#sorry to the blue lovers out there unfortunately i hate the colour

[leafrue]

ask game

i was tagged my @moodnamars + @astralsi 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🫶

fav color?: maroon is my all time fave but atm i’m into bright funky fresh colours!! think pink orange purple (NOT blue)

currently reading?: fire + blood by george r.r. martin

last song you listened to?: 3am by haim

last series you watched?: heartbreak high (the og series not!! the reboot. there’s 210 episodes pls wish me luck 🙏)

sweet, savory or spicy?: spicy!! and savoury!!

craving?: maccies sausage mcmuffin??

tea or coffee?: coffee unfortunately ☕️

working on: girls girls boys: the original: the redux

tagging @cheesehair @itsmariejanel @orphyd @ldobmm @sojutrait @sashima @lake-lunvik + you if you’re reading this and wanna do it

[xoxoxoz]

heyy :D it’s the jeemin anon again ! can i request again? really enjoyed the one you wrote for me b4 😞!! jeemin x fem!reader, fake dating into lovers tropes! soo your two friend groups dared the two of you to fake date each other because they’re the only one who knew that you both like each other >< !! (jeemin is the top! like u said not in nsfw way 😭) take your time writing this!!

THANK YOUUU 🩷

Hi Jeemin Anon! Thanks for another adorable request💘

Bang Jeemin x F!reader

⚠️: fluff, comedy, soft, cutiepatootie JeemY/n

Jeemin hated group projects for one reason only and that was people’s lack of focus on their task. Unfortunately, she was that person. Her reason?

You.

“If you want us to pass this stupid poster assessment, I suggest you keep your eyes on your laptop instead of Y/n” Yunah mumbled tiredly.

Moa, Jihyun, and Chanelle looked up from their laptops.

“How about opening your eyes Yunah? We’re not gonna get anything done with you sleeping all the damn time” Jihyun fired back, slapping a stack of paper into Yunah’s face.

“Ow! I wasn’t sleeping okay? I was resting my vision”

“You’re unbelievable. And Bang Jeemin, if you don’t stop staring at Y/n, I’m gonna stab these crayons in your eyes so you don’t have to ever see her again!”

Jeemin jumped at the threat and began typing away. “I’m sorry. She just looks really pretty”

“You say that every single time. She looks the same!” Jihyun exclaimed as all heads turned to your group’s table in the classroom.

Your group are known to be the pretty girls of the school, consisting of Funa, Minju, Moka, Jiwoo, and of course you.

Although Jeemin did find the other girls pretty, you caught her eye (and heart) easily the day you were introduced as the new student. Being Funa’s cousin, you fitted in and became very well liked by the entire school.

“Jeemin’s looking at you again” Jiwoo whispered.

You turned your head and caught the girl’s eyes just before she averted her attention back to her laptop like nothing happened.

“She totally likes you, Y/n. Just ask her out” Moka said.

“Just because she looks at me doesn’t mean she likes me. She has a line of girls going after her so there’s no way she’d pick me” you slouched in your seat and pouted.

“Y/n, I swear on my DPR Ian album that she likes you too. She looks at you like you put the stars in the sky, do I really need to go on?” Minju smiled but you shook the delusions away.

“You guys are just trying to make me feel better”

Funa pursed her lips and leaned towards Jiwoo. “I’ve never met anyone more oblivious than my own cousin”

“I agree. Didn’t you tell Moa to convince Jeemin in confessing? These two have been liking each other longer than I remembered, it’s killing me”

“Me too but Moa said Jeemin isn’t budging. Apparently Jeemin thinks Y/n and Minju are secretly dating”

Minju heard the conversation and her eyes widened. “What the—I like Jihyun! I thought I’ve made that obvious”

“Not obvious enough for her to finally ask you out on a date” Moka teased, earning a playful glare from Minju.

“What are you guys talking about?” You whispered.

Funa suddenly had an idea. “We were just discussing Jiwoo’s plan of going to the fun fair tonight!”

Jiwoo frowned. “We were?”

Funa pinched her thigh under the table and spoke through gritted teeth. “Yes. We. Were”

“OW—Oh yeahhhh. I think it would be nice for us to hang out after all these assessments”

You slowly nodded. “Oh that sounds fun”

Minju smirked at Funa and played along. “We should invite Jihyun’s group too. The more the merrier right Moka?”

The Japanese girl smiled cheekily. “Yeah so I can see Chanelle”

“Wait we’re gonna invite them? Oh my god, I need to shop for a new outfit. What’s Jeemin’s favourite colour? Sky blue right? Oh god oh god” You rambled and opened the Pinterest app on your phone for some inspiration.

The girls high fived each other before Funa stood up and walked over to Jihyun’s group. “Hey there”

All were surprised to see the pretty Japanese girl smiling at them. Moa felt her face go red.

“H-Hey Funa. What’s up?”

“Just wanted to ask if you were all free tonight?”

“We’re actually studying tonight—OW!” Chanelle hissed as Moa kicked her under the table.

“Yes we’re free. Why do you ask?” The Thai student chuckled shyly.

“The girls and I are planning to go to the fair. Some extra company would be great” Funa put on her best flirtatious tone and effortless wink towards Moa.

“Sounds good. We’ll all be there”

Funa chuckled and brushed her fingers under Moa’s jaw. “You better be. 6pm sharp. Don’t keep us waiting”

The group watched Funa walk away before sending a glare towards their Thai member.

“Moa seriously? We aren’t even halfway done with this poster” Jihyun huffed.

“Hear me out. Funa brainwashed me”

“Oh shut up” Jeemin mumbled.

“No no keep hearing me out. All your crushes will be there hello? It’s about time we stopped being cowards and finally ask them out! Especially you Jeemin—Hold on I’m getting a phone call” Moa awkwardly chuckled and took out her vibrating device.

“You’re seriously taking a call in the middle of class?” Jihyun pinched her nose bridge.

“Funa why are you calling me? You were just here a few seconds ago” Moa whispered, seeing the girl stare at her from the other table.

“I know I’m sorry but I didn’t wanna wait until lunch. We have a plan but make sure Jeemin isn’t listening”

Moa looked towards Jeemin cautiously, seeing that she was daydreaming again. Typical.

“What’s your plan?” Moa sighed.

“Y/n and Jeemin are the biggest cowards I’ve seen in my life. I can only think of one way to try and get them to finally be together”

“And that is?”

“Daring them to fake date. Now I know it sounds a bit childish but I’m sure it’ll get one to finally say something”

The Thai student massaged her temple. “If I didn’t like you so much, I would’ve found this idea silly. But I’ll trust your word on this”

“Did you just say you like me?”

“ANYWAYS how are we starting this plan of yours?”

“Make some space at your table. We’ll join you in a bit”

“Alright” Moa quickly responded and ended the call. “Scoot over everyone”

The group blinked with confusion but moved anyways as Funa’s group took their belongings and slid into the empty chairs across Jihyun’s table.

“Hi!” Minju waved directly at Jihyun.

“H-Hi?”

“Hope you don’t mind us joining. We need some inspiration for this project” Minju smiled sweetly that got Jihyun running laps.

“And also to talk about the plan tonight. I’m very happy you’re all coming with us” Jiwoo said, eyeing Yunah a bit longer than usual.

Yunah shifted in her seat uncomfortably.

“Hi Jeeminie” You waved at the taller girl.

“H-Hi Y/n! You look pretty”

You looked down at your uniform and giggled. “We’re all wearing the same clothes”

Jeemin face palmed. “You’re right but you just make it look better than everyone else”

“Aw that’s so sweet of you to say. Thank you”

“Yuck. This hurts to watch, but anyways, tonight sounds like a lot of fun” Moa commented.

Jiwoo slowly smirked. “But you know what’ll be fun right now?”

You looked cluelessly at her. “What?”

“A little game of truth or dare”

Jihyun leaned back and sighed. “We have an assessment due”

“And it can wait. This would be a good break for us”

“Well Jiwoo, since you asked for it, truth or dare?” Chanelle grinned.

“Easy. Truth”

“Is it true your pants ripped in front of everyone during P.E?”

“Fuck you. I pick dare now”

Chanelle wiggled her finger. “No no no. You have to stick to your first decision”

“Ugh yes it’s true! I don’t know why I got detention for it” Jiwoo crossed her arms, rolling her eyes the laughter from everyone else. “Moving on. Jeemin, truth or dare?”

“Uh…truth?”

“Do you find Y/n pretty?” Jiwoo asked and batted her eyelashes as a little tease.

“Of course I do”

“Then I dare you to date her—OW!”

Funa slapped the back of Jiwoo’s head. “That’s not how you play truth or dare, idiot”

“And you’re ruining the plan” Moka added within a whisper.

“Sorry Jiwoo’s old brain forgets the rules sometimes. Let’s continue” Funa flicked her wrist.

“Y/n, truth or dare?” Moa asked this time.

“I feel bold today so I choose dare”

“I dare you and Jeemin to fake date until the end of the fair tonight”

“What?!” You and Jeemin yelled in unison.

“Scared?” Moa mocked.

You straightened your posture and puffed out your chest. “No! That dare is gonna be a piece of cake”

‘If only I didn’t get a limited time’ You thought.

“And if Jeeminie is okay with the dare too”

The taller girl used her book to fan her face. “I don’t mind it at all. What do we get out of this dare?”

“You’ll see later” Moka patted your back.

“So Kim Y/n, will you be my fake girlfriend tonight?”

“I’d love to, Bang Jeemin”

(Time Skip cuz we need our JeemY/n content asap)

“What did I say about biting your fingernails?” Jihyun gently slapped Jeemin’s hand away from her mouth.

“I’m nervous okay? Do I look good?”

Jihyun took a step back to scan the outfit.

“You look great Jeemin, don’t worry so much”

“There they are!…Holy shit” Chanelle pointed, her jaw slowly dropping.

Jeemin turned around and almost went into cardiac arrest when she laid eyes on your beautiful group. Mostly you.

She felt the world go into slow motion as you approached closer in a sky blue sundress and a smile so bright that it put the stars to shame. The lights from the fair made you look angelic and Jeemin concluded that she didn’t need to know what heaven was like anymore.

“Hey guys!” Funa waved excitedly and clung onto Moa’s arm.

“Minju you look stunning” Jihyun breathed out with amazement, making Minju smile shyly.

“Thank you”

“Ready for a fun night?” Moka booped Chanelle’s nose who nodded enthusiastically.

“I’ll count this as our first date, Noh Yunah” Jiwoo winked and put her arms around the taller girl.

“D-Date?”

Jeemin still had her jaw on the floor which you laughed at. “Do I look that good Jeeminie?” You asked and did a little twirl.

“Good? You look so…wow. I feel so lucky to be your girl-FAKE girlfriend!” Jeemin quickly corrected herself, not catching the slight disappointment in your face.

“Yeah…fake girlfriend”

“I think we should all split ways and meet up at the food area just before the fireworks start” Jiwoo suggested, earning a approving nod from everyone.

Jeemin offered her hand to you. “Ready to make this night memorable?”

You held her hand gently.

“Lead the way”

Throughout the night, Jeemin managed to impress you with her amazing skills in almost every game, winning plushie after plushie that she had to get you a wagon to carry it all. She ended up dragging the wagon in the end after claiming that a Princess should never carry all her stuff.

You two shared some cotton candy, milkshakes, and made each other DIY bracelets that matched love heart charms.

As it was almost time for the fireworks to happen, you and Jeemin stood by the food trucks, waiting for the others arrival. The taller quickly took off her jacket and wrapped it around your shoulders.

“A Princess shouldn’t get cold”

“Aw Jeemin, you’re such a sweetheart”

The girl smiled before looking at her phone, seeing a message from Chanelle, Moa, and Jihyun.

[Jihyunnie 🍫: It’s now or never, Bang Jeemin. Tell her how you feel]

[Nelle🌙: don’t back out girl. This is your only chance]

[Aom 🍒: CONFESS YOU IDIOT!]

Jeemin felt the uneasy feeling in her stomach as she put her device away. “Hey Y/n, can I show you this place while we wait?”

“Yeah sure”

She took your hand again and led you to a hill that showed a great view of the entire fair underneath the moonlight.

“Wow” you exhaled at the beautiful scenery. “It’s gorgeous”

“Y/n, there’s something I want to tell you”

You looked into her eyes and felt nervous at how serious the taller girl had looked. A face you’ve never seen before. “What is it?”

Jeemin started hearing the 10 second countdown from the crowd for the fireworks. She held your shoulders and looked deeply into your eyes.

“First of all, I had an amazing time tonight, and that’s only because you were by my side for the entirety of it. I don’t think I can handle bottling my feelings anymore because it’s hurting me so so bad”

“Jeemin? What are you saying?”

“I don’t want you being my fake girlfriend anymore, Y/n. I want it all to be real. I love you so much that I can’t bear to imagine seeing you with anyone else”

Your eyes widened. “You love me?”

“So much Y/n. I’m sure it’s not the first time you’ve heard it from someone, considering there’s a line of people who want you just as bad as I do. But I completely understand if you don’t feel the same you know—“

You had to admit seeing her ramble was super cute but you didn’t want to waste any more time and there was only one simple way to shut her up.

You cupped her face and your lips melted into her soft ones. At the same time the fireworks had erupted into the night sky, coating it in a variety of beautiful colours.

Jeemin’s heartbeat was ringing in her ears as she finally comprehended that her crush was kissing her. After tears, daydreaming, and staring, she finally got you, and there was no place she’d rather be than holding you close as you continued to share a romantic kiss.

“We did it!!” Funa screamed, coming out from behind the bushes with the other girls.

They all jumped around and cheered.

You pulled away from Jeemin’s lips and became shocked at seeing all your friends. “What are you all doing here?”

“We finally got you two together!” Jiwoo applauded.

“And it took a long time” Moa scoffed and wiped the fake sweat from her forehead.

“Wait, you all knew we liked each other?” Jeemin questioned while back hugging you.

“Duh! The whole world knew besides you two”

“So you’re welcome” Chanelle chuckled, holding Moka’s hand.

“Let’s go eat more food to celebrate!” Jihyun yelled and dragged Minju with her to the food trucks.

The other girls decided to follow, leaving you alone with Jeemin again. You faced her and leaned your head on her shoulder. “I love you Jeeminie”

She kissed your head and swayed you gently. “I love you too. You just made me the happiest woman alive”

“You complete me”

She continued holding you in her warm embrace as the fireworks continued, leaving it as the best night of your life.

A/N: Jeemin anon I’m honestly not proud of this fic because I think I could’ve done so much better SO IM SORRY IF ITS NOT AS GREAT AS YOU WANTED IT TO BE T^T I can make you another fic as an apology🥹🫶🏼

[ali-kitkat]

Strangeness and Charm

MGI 2021 One-Year Anniversary Gift Exchange

hello, im back for a little post for @khneltea you are the recipient for enemies to lovers and by gods i hope you like this! romantic, or well its implied, daminette enemies to lovers! also tagging @issaxcharlie as per requested in the server!

fic is under the cut!

Marinette understood that the bat team was sent to Paris to help her; now that it was just herself against Papillon, but she really wanted to kick Robin’s teeth in. She couldn’t stand him. He was a self-centered, entitled, little shit. How dare he come into her city and tell her how to do her job? 

The akuma attacks had been sporadic since she had revoked Chat Noir’s miraculous and the only attack that had occurred since Robin and the rest of the bats had arrived was Mister Pigeon. However, if she was being honest with herself that hardly counted as an attack in her or anyone’s books anymore. 

It took all of her self control to not throttle him on the rooftop, after she had cast the miraculous cure, when he said “If this is what qualifies as an attack for you, I would hate to see how you would fare against even one of Gotham’s villains.” She was livid, he had based his opinions on akuma attacks by one attack and one attack only. 

He had only been in Paris for a week and this is how he treated her, because of one little flare up by their resident akuma magnet? He had no idea what even counted as an attack in Paris nowadays.

Mister Pigeon? Definitely not. 

Siren? Absolutely.

Due to him being close to her in age, she had constantly paired up with him during her nightly patrols and she hated it. She wondered if this was his team's way of trying to get him to socialize or work on his people skills. If so, they were doing an absolutely shit job of it. 

At this point she really had debated whether or not being on Batman’s shit list would be worth dangling Robin from the Eiffel Tower by his ankles. She could do it. She knows she could, she had done it before in fact, to Chat before she took his miraculous away from him. In the end, she decided that it wouldn’t be worth the trouble it would cause her; but if she did accidentally hit him with her yo-yo while patrolling with him that night, no one would be the wiser. 

She elected to ignore the muttered curses and detoured from her usual route in an attempt to get away from the miserable bastard. Of course, Robin then scolded her for running away and being an inferior hero. At that point she decided to put even more distance between them, only to prevent herself from injuring a potential ally. If he could even be called that with his constant berating and demeanor.

It was then that she heard a scream, an akuma. Kwami, she hoped it wasn’t Sandboy again, especially since his usual appearances were during the night. 

She cast a quick glance at Robin and decided to leave him be. She took off in the direction of the scream, he was preoccupied by something on his gauntlet, if the blue light it was emitting was an indicator. Besides she had been fighting akumas for years now, the last thing she needed was Robin’s attitude and chiding rather than his help. 

He didn’t need to see her nightmares either if it was in fact Sandboy who was akumatized as well.  Sure, she wasn’t exactly the same thirteen year old girl she was when she first started battling akumas but Robin certainly didn’t need any more ammunition to use against her. 

He didn’t need to see that her nightmares were of herself, whispering in her ear, telling her to give up. That she was a failure, that she should just let Papillon have the miraculous. It would all be over, it wasn’t like she would remember that she was Ladybug anyways. Whatever wish he would make would erase the current timeline out of existence. She hated seeing it.

When she touched down on the street, the first thing she noticed was that it was empty. There was no sign of any akuma, no destruction or frozen bodies. There wasn’t anything, it was too empty, as if the people had just up and disappeared. It was incredibly unnerving. 

Casting another look around, she saw something dart into the shadows of an alleyway. She jumped to a neighboring rooftop and looked down. There it was, the akuma. They didn’t look like anything special, no obnoxious colours or outrageous outfits. Just someone in a simple, sleek suit in muted colours, their hair tied back in a dark braid and a drooping butterfly mask that looked like ruined eyeliner. 

They looked up and made eye contact. She flung herself back on the rooftop. The akuma’s eyes looked empty, there was no emotion or life in them. It was disconcerting. 

She looked back down into the alleyway to try to get another read on the akuma. They were gone. She rose to her feet and looked around again, just in case she missed something. 

“Well, well, well. Look at what we have here,” a low, gravelly voice called out. It sounded as if they had gargled glass. Marinette quickly turned around to see the akuma at the other end of the rooftop. “A little ladybug all alone. Let us see what kind of memories you hold, heroine.”

Then suddenly the akuma was in front of her, arm outstretched and their hand was pressed against her forehead. She watched as her memories played out in real time before her and the akuma. She watched as her memories played side by side, all at once. It was headache inducing. 

Marinette saw the first friend she made in almost a decade. She saw Lila threaten her and her friendships. She saw the day she had met Tikki, and the day she had received guardianship of the miracle box from Fu. She watched as flashes of her homelife flashed by, the few happy memories of her parents before the bakery’s popularity increased, before they began to neglect her. Before Lila’s honeyed words ruined what little she had left of them. 

She watched as memories of previous akuma attacks played out. Of how Chat Noir acted away from the crowds and cameras, how treated her like an object to be won rather than a person. She watched as she had scrubbed herself raw in the shower after he had touched her, as she scrubbed her teeth after he forced a kiss on her.

She watched as the attacks ended and her reunions with her friends had turned into screaming fits. The shouts of how she was flakey and that if she was just going to hang out with them only to ditch them halfway through their time together that they were no longer going to be friends anymore, that they were better off without her. She watched as Lila smiled from across the room, where she comforted her former friend. As Lila’s promises came to fruition.

She watched as her nightmares flashed by just as quick of her looking in the mirror, looking at the scars that the miraculous cure hadn’t healed. As her reflection had started to speak. That she should give up, let Papillon have the miraculous. That she wasn’t worth it, that she was all alone. As the whispered words of her former friends had joined in. She watched as images of Chat had appeared telling her that she was his and no one else’s.

She watched as she was left to pick up the pieces of her life.

Suddenly she was wrenched back and someone was holding her against their person. She could see one of the bat-themed vigilantes fighting against the akuma, it looked to be Red Hood with the way the streetlight was glinting off his helmet. She could hear herself breathing heavily and could feel the tears streaming down her face as she was swung away from the akuma.

When the person holding her landed on a different rooftop, she wrenched herself out of their arms. She hit the rooftop with a thud and scrambled as far away from them as she could possibly get; then she buried her face in her knees. She covered her ears with her hands, hoping to block out the unrelenting images of her memories and nightmares. She didn’t want to see or hear anything. She certainly didn’t want to see anyone’s pitying looks or hear their scorn. She just wanted to forget, this akuma was most definitely Papillon’s newest masterpiece. 

She flinched when a hand settled on her shoulder and tried to inch away from it, without removing her hands from her ears. Unfortunately, the hand remained, grounding her ever so slightly. Finally she gave in and looked up. Robin was watching her, but rather than disdain or pity, his face was pinched with concern. She huffed out a laugh, it was weak and made Robin flinch. She shrugged his hand off and stood; she held her head high and wiped her tears away. Ignoring his questioning looks, she tossed her yo-yo out. 

“Ladybug,” he said softly. 

“Don’t. Whatever you have to say, keep it to yourself. I don’t care,” she croaked. She didn’t want to hear anything he had to say, she just wanted to be done with this night and its horrors.

“Ladybug,” he repeated. “Regardless of whatever you might think or feel, you are not alone. There are plenty of other heroes who know exactly how you feel, who have been exactly where you are.” 

That stopped her in her tracks. Of course Robin of all people had seen her memories, her nightmares and her fears. She turned and glared at him, though she imagined it wasn’t all that effective. What with her tear streaked face and red eyes. 

“I know how you feel,” Robin sighed and she deflated. “That your best is not enough, that you, yourself are not good enough. I have been in your shoes. I have felt alone.”

“Well, you certainly don’t act like it,” she sniped bitterly, closing in on herself.

“I apologize,” Robin stated. 

“What?” 

“I am sorry,” he repeated. “I realize that I may have come off as too brusque and in doing so have diminished your accomplishments.” 

“Why?” she asked. “Why are you apologizing? You have nothing to be sorry for. You were right, I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m just playing at being a hero. My villain just found out my identity and so did all of you and your team.”

“That being, it was not, nor is it, your fault,” he replied. “I made assumptions of which I am at fault for, and of which caused the predicament of which you have found yourself in. You cannot quit or give up because of several imbeciles, because if you do, you let them win. You do not strike me as a sore loser, Ladybug.”

Marinette let out a laugh and watched as Robin’s expression shifted. He no longer looked concerned, but was now smiling wryly at her. She returned the smile. “Thank you Robin.” 

“You are welcome,” he said. “Now I believe you have an akuma to take care of? Would you care for some assistance?” 

“I would,” she replied.

“I look forward to working with you more,” he said, “Marinette.” 

Marinette nodded, feeling her face flush at the way Robin said her name. “I do too Robin. I do too.”

[siriusmydeer]

For the Thank You Next can you do Imagine with James Potter?

thank you, next.

james potter x slytherin!fem!reader

summary: you go through the stages of love till you find your person.

word count: 2.3k

warnings: mutual pinning, over use of sarcasm it’s so bad, SWEARING, kissing, mentions of kissing, mentions of an arm falling off, mentions of injury

—0:00

‘Thought I'd end up with Sean

But he wasn't a match

Wrote some songs about Ricky

Now I listen and laugh

Even almost got married

And for Pete, I'm so thankful

Wish I could say "thank you" to Malcolm

'Cause he was an angel’

one day, when you’re young, your mother tells you, ‘there’s lots of fish in the sea, but you have to wait for the right catch’ or maybe that was just your deranged mother. normally, you thought all of that was bullshit. a slytherin princess should never be mistreated, someone whomst you honour and adore with all in your beating heart; turns out slytherin boys didn’t get the fucking memo.

the only person who did understand was the one and only, regulus arcturus black. but you unfortunately lacked sexual attraction to him so therefore you couldn’t date him, so that was a feigning issue. evan rosier was fit, top of his classes and a quite nice mop of blonde on his head, he was a quidditch player and a pureblood slytherin; so etiquette is to be clearly expected. too other schoolmates, especially the fawning girls of almost every house, he was probably the full package, one of the alpha males that roamed the hallways at hogwarts; oh were those girls the biggest knob heads to exist.

turns out he was just the biggest fucking dick to ever walk the planes of the earth, he ran around with idiots like lucius malfoy— another mistake of the century, and little severus snape; thank merlin, and salazar slytherin themselves you never resorted to him.

‘One taught me love

One taught me patience

And one taught me pain

Now, I'm so amazing

Say I've loved and I've lost

But that's not what I see

So, look what I got

Look at what you taught me

And for that, I say’

normally your first couple of boyfriends should teach you something out of the relationship, maybe what you needed to strengthen for the next time you were in an intimate relationship, like trust, communication, maybe even sexual intimacy.

all these absolute dunces taught you was to pick your boyfriends better, and to stay away from every slytherin male that had ever entered hogwarts. evan— oh, he only taught you that everyone and everything was a priority over you, always the ‘talk to you later.’ and the casual, ‘blowjob?’ comments; absolutely fucking arse. lucius, couldn’t forget his moto in your mind even if you jammed it in your strongly-witted brain that money was power and money over any atom to every exist.

regulus understood, strict pureblood parents but he still understood how to treat a partner. i guess it was nice not picking up every habit of walburger and onion— sorry, walburga and orion, noble heirs of the house of black. yeah, did i mention they were second cousins?

‘Thank you, next (next)

Thank you, next (next)

Thank you, next

I'm so grateful for my ex

Thank you, next (next)

Thank you, next (next)

Thank you, next (next)’

“you could always hang out with my brothers mates, i see them not casually oogling you.” oh regulus, sometimes you did lack the slytherin wit and ambition. he was sprawled on the malachite coloured couch, a pearly white quill fumbled between his slender digits as he started aimlessly into oblivion at the dying out fire in the midst of the frigid common room.

“yeah, let me go hang out with my best friends brothers friends, slytherin haters! such a good idea, reg. maybe they should’ve put you in ravenclaw from that amazing idea!” if you were sarcastic before, there aren’t a non-vulgar amount of words in the universe to describe the tremendous mockery in your tone; as you intensely stared into the crevices of the ceiling while laying on the opposite viridescent sofa.

“merlin, tone down the sarcasm a bit? i was just offering, it’s not like your a pureblood, or a prat.” regulus offered, looking at your form, your elbow now covering your eyes and making recurring heavy sighs every few minutes. “being a half-blood is enough for hatred, regulus, m’dear.” you sighed again, in defeat. hopeless romantic and hated by many, fantastic, am i right?

‘Spend more time with my friends

I ain't worried 'bout nothin'

Plus, I met someone else

We're havin' better discussions

I know they say I move on too fast

But this one gon' last

'Cause her name is Ari

And I'm so good with that (so good with that)’

don’t think, breath and just do what your heart tells you to. fuck that— panic, cry, scream, whatever, be scared. you were gaping at the red mass and overdue of shades, it wasn’t ugly but definitely not the prettiest colour to exist; mixed with mustard yellow. gryffindor students absolutely covered in both. well students, no, james potter, yes.

he happen to be your victim, well friend of sirius; regulus did say after all they oogled you, whatever that meant. you both played quidditch, pretty decent grades, both had good humour, your more so, i mean c’mon you couldn’t find that wit just anywhere, and well you could be best friends. well friends, acquaintances, maybe one, possibly. if only you had the confidence of a leo male, all you needed was to strut over to the damn quidditch field and say something, literally anything.

so that’s exactly what you did, your shoes crunching against the no-longer damp grass, dry after morning dew showers. your bag hanging off of your left arm, your head preoccupied with ways on how to greet someone because slytherin etiquette right now was not the way to go; it would only cause assumptions and stereotypes. i mean who the actual fuck says, ‘how do you do?’ anymore.

‘She taught me love (love)

She taught me patience (patience)

She handles pain (pain)

That amazing (yeah, she's amazing)

I've loved and I've lost (yeah, yeah)

But that's not what I see (yeah, yeah)

'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)

Ain't no need for searching

And for that, I say’

enemies, nope. acquaintances, don’t think so. friends, getting there. close friends, i would say. if someone ever said they saw james fleamont potter hanging around a slytherin they would’ve assumed that someone was knocked upside the head with the biggest beaters bar you could find, but the green and red weren’t that bad of a mix after all.

henceforth, here you were giggling like school girls with james fucking potter right by the black lake. “james, respectfully, stop carrying that stupid snitch everywhere. doesn’t it weigh down your pockets?” you queried the boy who was fumbling with the golden snitch for the past three minutes, flipping his hair so he could knock the brunette tendrils from his eyes while he gaped at you.

you were glowing— the sun at its highest peek, he could’ve been on his knees thanking albus dumbledore in his office for free period; knowing james we would’ve offered to comb his beard and maybe even a shampoo and condition it while he was at it.

your eyes glittered as you chortled at him for dropping that stupid ball for the third time, your hair dancing in the wind like it was a routine, a perfect routine, your teeth glinting at the suns ethereal rays that hit you just right. imagine if james’ foolish cocky mask instead would’ve rejected your offer of friendship that one humid day on the quidditch pitch— he would’ve been the biggest git to ever stride the planet.

‘Thank you, next (thank you, next)

Thank you, next (thank you, next)

Thank you, next (thank you)

I'm so grateful for my ex

Thank you, next (thank you, next)

Thank you, next (said thank you, next)

Thank you, next (next)

I'm so grateful for my ex

Thank you, next

Thank you, next

Thank you, next’

friends, that’s what it was suppose to be. pals, mates, schoolmates, whatever the fuck you called it. it wasn’t suppose to be frenemies, to friends to lovers! you weren’t suppose to notice the navy blue flecks of colour in his cerulean eyes, the way his lips curled in a smile after he caught that silly snitch that blazed the thick sure after a hefty match, the way he brushed the tresses of hair behind your ears when the wind was assaulting your face and you were basically swallowing your hair.

now sitting with him in the library you were mentally stabbing your stygian heart, why men. why do they do things, why do men sometimes have the decency to show sympathy, and partiality with their friends. he hugged you, he kissed your forehead when you felt dejected, james potter went through the slytherin common room to bring you chocolates on your period. which fucking gryffindor would do that, huh? definitely not frank longbottom or fabian prewett.

his hand scathed yours as he pointed at how to make a draught of peace potion, his hand was warm and smooth but only from what you touched— you could see slight callouses forming on the pads of pads palm from broom handling, and the small cracks in his knuckles from the lacking use of lotion. you felt the rapid rate of your heart merely increasing at the minute from the slight touch, a rush of rose clouded your cheeks. this was so embarrassing.

‘One day I'll walk down the aisle

Holding hands with my mama

I'll be thanking my dad

'Cause she grew from the drama

Only wanna do it once, real bad

Gon' make that last

God forbid something happens

Least this song is a smash (song is a smash)’

you were mid flight, smashing a bludger in the direction of the vermillion colours. even when you were immensely sweaty, intensely panting, abundantly tired, and your arm looked like it wanted to fall off he wanted to kiss the energy back into you. james loved winning against slytherin, it might’ve been his favourite thing at hogwarts; but he would murder a pack of death eaters if it meant he got to see your smile when your emerald-clad seeker clutched that small golden ball.

both teams landed, a handshake due for the game to be over after almost two continuous hours of playing and that stubborn ball blazing the air. he meant to walk over there, a hug overdue in his prideful way of saying congratulations but he did not think that he would’ve strided over to your panting figure and clasped your soft cushion lips with his own parched ones from the continuous heaving in his breath.

your lips tasted of peach, hints of mango. your lips dried of chapstick but still smooth— feeling the grooves in your lips, they were puffy and swollen probably from the tremendous amount of times you had bitten your lips in anxiety. your lips disconnected for a moment, suddenly realizing that you had an audience of your fellow slytherins, your enemy gryffindors and not one but two shocked crowds of hufflepuffs and ravenclaws suddenly watching the private scene unfold.

james cleared his throat, looking at your grinning face that was encased between his palms, your face was significantly flushed, your chest moving every millisecond at the loss of breath in your lungs. “good, uh, good game james.”

‘I've got so much love (love)

Got so much patience (patience)

I've learned from the pain (pain)

I turned out amazing (turned out amazing)

I've loved and I've lost (yeah, yeah)

But that's not what I see (yeah, yeah)

'Cause look what I've found (yeah, yeah)

Ain't no need for searching

And for that, I'll say’

cocky, quidditch captain, school prankster, pureblood gryffindor, and head boy. that to the peering eyes of hogwarts was james potter, but he was so much more than that. he was like an onion, gross comparison but for the sake of it you’ll use it, he had layers but everyday it’s like you cried a little less and you peeled just a bit more.

he was benevolent, he guided first years to common rooms and sometimes he studied with fourth year hufflepuffs. he was sensible, sometimes, he helped out madame pomfrey in the healers wing when remus had been injured from a full moon along with any remaining students in the ward from previous incidents, not to mention, you did uncover remus’ ‘furry secret’ and swore to secrecy. and most of all, james was cherishing, he actually did give a fuck when you had a bad day, he stroked your back and hummed you stupid baby lullabies.

i mean could you imagine lucius malfoy and evan rosier humming a girl lullabies when they were upset? celebratory kisses after quidditch, bringing you snacks while you were overwhelmed in school work and actually made an effort in the relationship? they would’ve bought you a pair of red bottoms and called it a day.

‘Thank you, next (thank you, next)

Thank you, next (thank you, next)

Thank you, next

I'm so grateful for my ex

Thank you, next (thank you, next)

Thank you, next (said thank you, next)

Thank you, next (next)

I'm so grateful for my ex

Thank you, next

Thank you, next

Thank you, next

Yeah’

there was infact one thing that your past relationships taught you;

never date a man to ever be put in the slytherin house ever again.

taglist: @kittykylax @ronbrokemyheart @aspiringsloth20 @maddoxsmythologicalmind @amourtentiaa @msmb @five-cups-of-coffee @emmaev @serenitywilderness @spencerfuckingreidswhore @artemis1orion @famdomhideout @hufflepogue @dear-luna @luvvninaz @miraclesoflove @black-like-my-soul @sirius-animagus

[ficforce]

Handle With Care

Shinmon Benimaru x F!Reader

SFW

No set timeline

Established relationship

The weather was particularly hot and on days like this, the Town was quieter during the afternoon. People were content to stay in the shade to drink and talk, even the children were willing to wait for the sun to move a little in the sky to cool things down before they played again. Y/N hummed softly to herself as she continued to knit a new blanket for the Guardhouse’s supply. It was an unfortunate fact that sometimes people’s homes got destroyed when someone turned Infernal but the Hikeshi always did their best to provide for their people.

She looked up when a shadow crossed over her and smiled at the man stood in her light, a bored-looking expression on his face, “You’re in my light, Benimaru.” She pat the space beside her on the raised walkway of her friend’s home and the Captain dropped down beside her, “I was going to come home as soon as I finished this blanket, my friend came back early so I wasn’t stuck babysitting all day.” Y/N watched as Benimaru picked up the corner of the blanket to take a closer look at her handy work, “Were you passing by or looking for me?”

“Looking.” Benimaru next picked up one of her needles and gave a small grunt as he accidentally dropped it onto the ground where it seemed to simply vanish, “…Shit. Sorry, Y/N.” He knew she hated when he messed with her tools, he glanced at her face and her soft sigh felt as bad as being told off, “I’ll make sure to pick some new ones up.”

Shaking her head, she finished off the row and put everything down on her lap, “It’s okay, they were getting a little blunt for needlework.” Benimaru watched her reach to the side and hold up her flask, the outside was cracked and the handle broken, “Could you get me a new one of these?”

He blinked at it in silence; wasn’t that one only a few weeks old?

Then he realised that she probably hadn’t had enough to drink, he’d watched her prepare the tea the previous night so that it would be perfect for icing but it seemed her effort had gone to waste.

“Sure,” it was then his crimson gaze caught sight of the tea stain on her favourite yukata, “Did you drop it all over yourself?”

“I was drinking it and then someone walked into me… it was just an accident.” She didn’t dare tell him that the guy who walked into her called her a klutz and gave her a shove - it wasn’t worth the man being beaten to a pulp over a flask and her clothing.

“Tch, they could have offered to replace it for you” He sat up straighter, “Who was it?” he knew Y/N was too kind to make a fuss; she was always letting things like this slide even when it wasn’t her fault. Benimaru wished she would get mad sometimes, she wasn’t weak in the slightest and nor was she shy. She was just too damn nice.

It meant that, sometimes, she was taken advantage of.

He had hoped that maybe it would stop once they became an official couple but it was just the same. “Benimaru, It’s okay, it was just an accident.” She reached over to stroke his cheek and he huffed, “Did you fix the bar you broke last night? I went and apologised for the mess this morning, the owner was still sweeping up glass.”

“Y/N?!” The man she has walked into rushed to help her up and began apologising for knocking her down, explaining that he had been wrestling with two of the other guys there. “We were just messing - you okay?”

“It wouldn’t have happened if that guy hadn’t have touched you…” She should have been firmer in telling the drunk to get lost but she had asked so nicely the man laughed and grabbed her again. “You’re too forgiving, Y/N. If I didn’t know you could handle it I would worry all the time.” Benimaru leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek, “I’ll get you a new flask whilst I’m out with Konro. The Twins found something suspicious so we’re gonna check it out.”

Once the hottest part of the day was over, Asakusa bloomed back into life and Y/N headed to the butcher to pick up something a little special - the Hikeshi had been working flat out and she figured they deserved a little something. Not all of the Hikeshi lived in the guardhouse; some of them had their own homes and families. They only stayed on the nightshifts, if there was a party or if Benimaru had totalled their house. Most of the time everyone liked to meet in the evening and share a meal; this often included wives, girlfriends and children. Dinner was often loud and fun but it meant the kitchen was always busy during the day.

Removing her shoes at the genkan and stepping up into the main room Y/N walked straight into another body. She let out a surprised yelp and fell backwards onto the floor.

The other laughed, “Not if he’s gotta refer to that cripple, Konro. If you can’t fight then just die, ya know!”

Smiling at the three grown men who looked like scolded kids, she shook her head, “It was an accident, don’t worry about it, okay?” Her elbow throbbed a little but it wasn’t worth mentioning, “I’m going to get changed then help out with dinner. You three make sure you don’t hurt each other.”

“Y/N, you’re too nice! Waka woulda kicked our asses.”

“You can have a free hit, we’re men, we can take it!”

Y/N waved them off, “You’ll have to do far worse than knock me down to get a reaction, boys.” It wasn’t that she wasn’t annoyed or that she didn’t want to knock their heads together - she just didn’t like to lose her temper over small things. Maybe she was too forgiving and maybe she was a bit of a doormat but she had people who liked or loved her to get mad on her behalf.

Placing the shopping down at the doorway of her shared room with Benimaru, Y/N removed her yukata and tossed it into the laundry basket before pulling out a fresh one from the drawers. She liked the colour of this one; she also liked that the twins had picked it especially for her to do chores in. It wasn’t like she had to help out around the Guardhouse but she liked doing it… she couldn’t slack just because her lover was the Captain.

Grabbing the shopping on her way toward the kitchen she hummed quietly to herself, grabbing the sliding door to enter she paused when she heard her name from the other side.

“Do you think she’ll notice?”

Another male voice scoffed at that, “Even if she does she’ll not do anything, she’s such a wet blanket - why’s Shinmon even with her?”

“Maybe she’s just a really good lay?” It was only two voices, surprising as the kitchen should have been busier but she recognised the voices as two of the new recruits. They didn’t know her… they had no right to be talking about her this way.

She had heard it before, people made fun of her, they tried to take advantage of her too but she could usually ignore it. Once she got in there she knew they’d be too cowardly to say it to her face.

“She suits him, Shinmon is pretty pathetic - sure he’s strong but he’s not cut out to lead.”

Y/N’s hands were shaking as anger coiled low in her belly, her usual calm demeanour cracking as they mocked the people she loved most. They could say what they wanted about her but that was her family and she couldn’t just ignore that. “Well, the poison I picked up should be enough to see the Lieutenant and kids off. Just gotta hope if weakens Shinmon enough for us to handle him - then we get the old gang back together and take the town. Fucking Hikeshi think they run the place.”

Her eyes widened as she heard their plan, her mind going blank as she dropped the bag she had been carrying and slid open the door to the kitchen.

x - -

Hinata and Hikage both sneezed at the same time and Hikage complained loudly, “Someone’s talking about us!” Hinata nodded and then they both let out a surprised squeal as the ground shook slightly. Running to Konro, they each grabbed his pant leg and looked up at the smoke rising in the distance.

“An Infernal?” Konro looked at Benimaru whilst placing his hands on the girls, “…The alarm isn’t sounding though.” They were already on their way back from investigating what they had thought was a White Clad hideout but turned out to be a secret club for a bunch of kids playing ‘gangs’.

“Not an infernal.” Benimaru answered and squinted at the sky, “There’s a lot of heat and I didn’t hear any explosions…”

“Y/N!” Konro yelled as he got through the crowd and started shouting orders to have everyone moved back, “You’re gonna hurt someone! The fire is already spreading out of control!” She didn’t seem to be able to hear him and he knew she’d never forgive herself for causing this much destruction, “We’ll fix it, Y/N, just stop!”

Benimaru and Konro seemed to realise at the same moment what was happening and Benimaru called up one of his matoi, “What set her off?”

From above it was easier to see that a large crowd had formed outside the Guardhouse, smoke billowed off the burning blue flag that hung by the entrance and he could see part of the wall of the Guardhouse was blown out into the street.

There were a few Hikeshi trying to stamp out the sea of blue flames before they jumped from house to house and in the middle was Y/N.

Benimaru hopped off the matoi once he was close enough to the ground, standing between her and two cowering men, “Y/N.” He hadn’t seen her like this before, he had heard she could get angry but he had never once witnessed it; the bottom of her yukata was burning from the intensity of her ability and her eyes blazed. The way her face contorted in rage was so different from her usual calm expression, all of her anger was on the men behind him, “Whatever they did I’ll handle it - you need to cool down before you get hurt!”

Her ability had one of the highest temperatures on record, she had burnt him on occasion and Benimaru knew that she could burn out fast, he could see her chest heaving already as her oxygen ran low. “Y/N!”

Benimaru approached her after getting a few of his guys to grab the two battered men Y/N wanted to cremate, he reached for her shoulder and just before he could touch her he felt a sharp pain in his stomach and stumbled back a few feet.

She sent two tendrils of flame towards the men behind Konro, they skirted past Benimaru and Konro to catch the clothing of her targets. They screamed in fear as their clothing burnt and the heat started to break through their resistance, the Hikeshi holding them let go immediately. Her hand raised to deliver the finishing blow - she’d lost her senses. All she wanted was for the two men to vanish, to stop existing so that they could never hurt her family again.

“Enough!” Strong arms wrapped around her, Benimaru’s clothing began to smoke within seconds - her yukata was turning to scraps the longer she used her ability, “Stop,” he said into her ear, “This isn’t you, this isn’t my sweet girl - you gotta stop.” He didn’t want to knock her out but he also didn’t want her getting tephrosis.

He was hugging her too tightly for her to finish her attack and instead she increased the heat around her to force him to let go; the buildings on fire nearby lit up more violently than before. “Let me go! They were going to kill you! They were going to poison your food! They didn’t care that they’d kill Konro and the girls too!”

“And you’re gonna burn down the town to punish two cowards.” He felt her stiffen and then her body relaxed against him, the air around her began to cool rapidly and the fires on the buildings began to shrink. “We’re safe, you kept us safe but this is enough.”

“B-Beni…” The man didn’t say anything as she hid her face in his neck and clutched at his coat, “I’m sorry, I… I just- I can’t lose-!”

“I know,” He murmured. Earlier he had wished she would get angry more often but not like this. Not to the point of destroying property and losing her mind, “It’s done… leave the destroying to me from now on.”

“I’m sorry…” She whispered, “I thought I was better than this.” Y/N really thought she had a handle on her anger; it had been years since she had reacted like this. She had lost her family as a child, her mother had infernalised and killed her father before she could be put to rest. Y/N had been angry afterwards, hating that people could burst into flames, hating that the Hikeshi couldn’t get there in time to save what she had left; when her ability came in she could hardly control it and caused fires whenever she got angry. It had taken nearly killing another family to make her stop and change.

To start forgiving people and letting things slide. “D-did I hurt anyone?”

“No one important.” Benimaru picked her up into his arms and turned his head to catch Konro’s gaze, “They were gonna poison us, I’ll leave them to you, Konro.” The Lieutenant nodded and Benimaru headed inside to look after Y/N.

The twins ran after the couple to help, grabbing Benimaru’s clothing whilst occasionally glancing back, Asakusa didn’t treat traitors well and the hearing how they planned to use poison didn’t go down particularly well. “Konro looks real mad.” Hinata giggled.

“They shouldn’t have made Y/N angry first.”

[alovesongshewrote]

Kiss Me | Hisirdoux Casperan

Plot:  A fight between Douxie and the reader attracts some unwanted attention, and the only way out is to kiss.  At least in your opinion.  [Hisirdoux Casperan x Gender Neutral! Rival!Rreader]

Word count:  1,734

Warnings:  fighting, rivalry, tension (owo),  a lil’ spicy (bc rivals to lovers, so you know how that goes), swearing

A/N: I used some dialogue prompts from the blogs corvidprompts and dialogue-prompts because witty banter is hard to write

Magic was weird.

It was colourful and glowy, and it lit up the night.  Magic was super pretty, but also super noticeable, and that made it really hard to fight your arch-rival in the dark of the night without anyone noticing.  That didn’t mean you weren’t going to try.

And try you did!  With a blast of blue light, your back collided with a tree, ripping the breath from your lungs.

“Oh, come on Casperan,” you wheezed, “I know you can do better than that,” you paused again to violently cough, supporting yourself with the tree you had hit.  The tree was loose.

“Seriously (L/N)?” Hisirdoux emerged from the tree line, “Now is not the time for witty banter,”

“This isn’t banter, it’s flirting.  Now keep still, it’s harder to hit you when you move around like that,”  

He groaned as you steadied your hands, taking aim at the wizard.  He did the same.  The two of you moved against each other in sync, letting your magic fly towards your opponent.  Red and blue collided in the air, illuminating the night sky with a purple glow for the briefest of moments.  Your hits landed, and you were both blown back.

“Ugh,” you groaned, making your way up from the ground, “You… suck,”

“Oh, what, no more witty banter, darling?”

“Ok, you know what?  Fuck you, fuck this, when I’m done kicking your ass I’m going out and buying white flowy shirts and tight pants and we’re doing this like proper rivals!  You wanna insult me?  SEND ME A LETTER,”

“You talk too much,”

“Shut up,”

Red magic threw him back this time, you ran to his body, eager to kick him while he was down.  And you did.  He groaned, “Ugh, harder dadd-”

“Jesus, Casperan, you could at least buy me dinner first,”

“Cheeky,” he laughed out.  You allowed him to rise from the ground, getting yourself into a combative position.

“You’re so strange, you know that,”

“Yeah, I’m not the only one,”

You ran at him, throwing punches and spells in his direction.  Red and blue mixed, turning the world around you purple.  Eventually, it was enough to knock him onto his back.  Unfortunately, he took you with him.

You also landed unfortunately, straddling his lap, “Like I said emo boy,” you exhaled, “Dinner first,”

He made a noise between a groan and a screech, flipping you onto your back and jumping off of you, “Bold of you to assume I could afford that,”

“Oh god, do they not tip in this town?”

“Nope,”

“Oh, honey, I’m sorry,”  you let your guard down for a moment, relating to the hell of retail all too well.  Douxie, of course, used this against you, taking your legs out with his staff.

“Ahhh, ow.  That hurt, you bastard,”

He sighed, kneeling next to you, “You know we could avoid this if you just did as I asked,”

“Never gonna happen,”  You sprung up, grabbing his shoulders and pulling him to the ground.

“I will smite you,”

“Yeah, yeah,” you said, struggling to your feet, “You couldn’t smite a paper towel if it set itself on fire.  Get some perspective,”

You threw another spell at him, the red light threw him back a few feet.  He crawled to his knees.

“Awwe, Doux you’re on your knees in front of me.  Looks like you’ve really hit rock bottom,”

“It might, but I’ve brought a shovel and I’m ready to dig!”

“You really didn’t understand what I meant,”

You lifted your fists, red light surrounded them, Douxie did the same, still on his knees.  His frame was illuminated with blue light.

“I should’ve left you on the street corner where I found you,” he said, preparing to curse you. “BUT YA DIDN’T,”  you wasted no time, springing at him from your spot.  This time it was Douxie who hit a tree.

“C’mon now Doux,” you stalked over to the wizard, “Why do you hate me so much?  Is it really you?  Or did Merlin tell you I was a big bad bad influence and you instantly believed him?”

Douxie growled,  “That’s enough.  Get out of Arcadia (L/N),”

“Awe, but I was just starting to like it here,” you smirked, “Just tell me,” you dragged out the last word,  “Why do you want me gone so badly?”

“Because you’re a threat!”  the wizard sprung up and threw a spell your way.  It just missed you, but there was no time to celebrate.   Another curse was headed your way,

“You have no morals!  You don’t care about anyone but yourself!”  Douxie’s magic shot out at you.  With each spell, his control lessened, the blue light becoming more and more chaotic, and more and more of a threat.  

You too were losing control of the situation, and now you were struggling to regain it, mostly through banter.

“That’s not true!  I care about my dog,”  Your response only enraged the wizard further, making the situation worse.  More spells came your way.  You did the only thing you could and kept dodging, backing up and away from Douxie, who advanced on you.  It was becoming more and more clear that Merlin was not a card you should have played.

“You don’t take anything seriously!  You’re cruel and unusual, and,” Douxie stopped talking.  You took the moment to catch your breath, staring down your opponent.  Usually, the rivalry between you and the wizard was light-hearted, but the look in his eyes told another story.  Your heart sunk as you realized he might actually hate you.

The thought made you sick.  Did you even want to keep fighting if that was the case?  

You didn’t.

So, when Douxie came at you, you did nothing.  You just stood there as he advanced, backing you into yet another tree and pining your arms above your head.  You gasped slightly, feeling your heartbeat pick up speed in your chest, the sound of it roared in your ears.  Could he hear that?   You hoped not.

He leaned closer to you, his lips beside your ear.  You pressed your eyes shut.  If he hated you, what came next?  This was a very strange way to kill someone.

“You’re cruel and unusual, and you keep distracting me,” “What!?”

“I said, you keep-”

“Sorry to interrupt,”  Archie’s voice nearly drew a scream from you, “But someone is coming!”

You took a moment to curse the light show that was magic before looking around.  You could see bushes moving nearby.  Someone was definitely headed your way.

“Shit,” you muttered.

“Archie, hide,”  Douxie’s familiar did as he asked while you pondered what the hell to do next.  If anyone found you and Douxie in this position it would raise a lot of questions.  There was only one thing you could think to do.  It would also raise questions, but hopefully, there would be fewer of them because there were no other options.

“Kiss me,”

“What?”

There was no time.  Whoever it was was only moments from finding the two of you.

So, you broke from the wizard’s hold, grabbing his face and bringing your lips to his.  The kiss was soft.  His body was warm.  Your eyelids fluttered closed as you moved a hand from his face to the back of his neck.  His hands moved too, finding their way to the small of your back, pulling you closer to him.

The two of you moved in perfect sync as if the universe had made you for each other.  The kiss became more passionate, stealing your breath and making your heartbeat even faster than before.  Sparks ran through your body, demanding more, more what you didn’t know.  Every nerve was on fire.  Your body burned like an ember smouldering in the night.  

Unfortunately, you couldn’t focus all of your being into the kiss, as much as you wished you could.  You stated alert, listening for whoever had come to investigate the bright lights in the forest.  You said a little thank you to the gods when the person missed you entirely and disappeared back into the trees.

And then you cursed them because that meant you had to separate yourself from Douxie.

Your lips came apart, leaving both of you breathing heavily.  You shut your eyes again and brought your forehead to rest on his chest.  He didn’t let go of you.  If anything, he only brought you closer to him, burying his face in your hair.

“So,”

“So,”

You looked up at him, “That was nice,”

“It was totally nuclear,”

You smiled slightly, before moving your hands from his neck to encircle his waist, “I’m sorry.  For what I said about Merlin, I’m sorry,”

“I’m sorry too, love.  For everything, all of this.  I-I didn’t mean-”

“I know,”

“And I know you care about the world outside of you, and your dog and-”

“Douxie?”

“Yeah?”

“Just shut your mouth and kiss me again,”  

The wizard did what you told him.  This time, you let yourself melt into it.

The kiss was too short in your opinion, but you had more questions, “So, I guess you don’t hate me, huh?”

“(Y/N), darling, I could never hate you.  I think you’re amazing.  You’re so strong, and fearless, and you’re one of the most skilled magic users I’ve ever met.  You distract me because you’re just so-”

“Beautiful,” you cut him off, not talking about yourself, but rather to yourself about Douxie.

“Yeah, that,”  

You kissed again, this time, the length was more satisfactory.

“So, what do we do now?”

“I still wanna go to dinner sometime.  And I’m getting the bill because the tips in this town suck,”

“I-”

“No, seriously, I got it.  I invested in Apple back in the day,”

“You’re brilliant,”

“Thanks, I know,”

The two of you shared a smile, reveling in the moment until a small cough came from one of the bushes.

“Oh, yeah, hey Arch,”

“Hi, Douxie.  (Y/N),”

“Hey Archie, how are you?”

“I’m just fine, but right now Douxie and I need to get back into town.  The bookstore won’t guard itself,”

“It literally will with warding, but ok,”

“Go home with your familiar emo boy, your bookstore needs you,”

“What about you?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be around.  I’ll pick you up sometime on Saturday for dinner?”

“Nuclear,”

You giggled again, pecking him on the lips one more time before letting him go.

“Goodnight. Casperan,”

“Goodnight, (L/N),”

[planetjisungie]

détester- l.dh

characters; slytherin! haechan x gryffindor! reader ft. gryffindor! mark (its just a given at this point) and slytherin! jisung

summary; enemies to lovers, you and donghyuck had always just hated eachother. you dont know when it started, or why it started but it was starting to get annoying.

an; i WILL finish my hogwarts series tonight we only have chenle left but now we have more fluff than actual crack because simon says is playing

congratulations you have reached gryffindor level you lucky prick

only the finest gryffindor

you are the embodiment of courage, literally if there was a ditch and someone fell down while everyone was too scared to help them, youd dive in before they could even say ‘dumbledore’

and you just so happen to be the younger sister of mark lee

the infamous mark lee,, that is

lucky prick part 2

but one thing made you seem not so lucky

your sworn enemy, lee donghyuck

or haechan as he liked to be called because apparently all evil villains needed a fake name

thats what you said anyway, he just liked the name haechan for its meaning

but he was also the emodiment of a slytherin, ambitious, cunning, resourceful and he was a pretty damn good leader

hence him being the captain of the quidditch team (no we are not going down the jisung route)

you didnt actually know when you started hating him, in your first year he had just decided to tie your poor, poor cat like a pig for roasting (he was in his second year already)

mr snuggles was traumatized

after that day it was small things to annoy you

like when he put hair dye in your conditioner bottle, resulting in your hair turning out a seafoam green colour

which you actually didnt mind so the joke was really on him, you pulled that shit off

or when he put spiders in your school shoes

that was unpleasant

and he also put a cockroach in your pocket, scaring your poor best friend who was terrified of the creatures

jisung was shaking, he hates cockroaches

to this day you still didnt know why he was a slytherin, but you guessed it was because he was a pureblood, very ambitious and resourceful but not so scary

but today was no exception

you walked towards the gryffindor table, robe billowing behind you as if you were walking in a movie

you were a lee sibling, you were both good at literally everything and deserved all the praise on earth

you fucking go girl, i stan

jisung sat at your table, the gryffindors appeared not to mind, especially as he was actually super nice

"y/n haechan told me to give you this"

ah there it was

the small hufflepuff girl handed you the letter before scurrying off back to her table

"y/n im scared"

jisung was already frightened of what that letter would hold

and you were a good friend, who knew no good would come from that letter

so you shoved it in your pocket, letting it crumple up before turning back to your breakfast

rip donghyuck

that was a fat L for our boy

he just wanted your attention

at first at least, he just wanted to be noticed by you so he pulled the cat stunt, making sure he didn’t actually harm the creature because he is still a decent human being and the grey furry animal did nothing to him

but now he had taken things too far

and he realised that after the stunt he pulled which resulted in you

yes, you, the brave, courageous gryffindor, crying

yeah he fucked up

he casted an illusion spell that infiltrated your sleep, creating nightmares with your deepest fears

and he regretted that

prank gone wrong *nearly killed her* (not clickbait)

you were still pissed at him for that

but that letter in your pocket was no ordinary letter

it was a confession letter, because he; yes him, the infamous slytherin, was too scared to talk to you about it in person

yet you literally just crushed his heart

which he kinda deserved to be fair

but jisung sent you a grateful smile and you went back to your conversation of which cereal brand was better

the answer is obviously lucky charms or frosted shreddies pengers mate

so our baby slytherin needed to find another way to get his feelings across because he was failing

and brother mark was: not happy

mark was a friend of haechan but despite his complaints every goddamn time that he needed to stop his stupid jokes that weren’t actually jokes, he didnt listen

maybe he shouldve listened

mark knows best

apart from jenos fic, mark was a real bitch but this is mark 2.0

mark really doesnt know best

anyways moving on

its time for innovative hyuck™️

so its back to the drawing room, sitting next to yuta (his head boy) to discuss the next plan of action

cutie yuta felt that haechan opening up to him about his feelings was the biggest achievement during his time at hogwarts

so right, the next plan

it was to leave flowers on your bed and then when you turned around to see who put them there (hypothetically) he would be there and he could make his outstanding apology

but of course, this isnt some fanfiction where everything goes right

who do you take me for?

so later that day he gathered his flowers, tying them in a cute dark green ribbon

staying with the slytherin theme

and he put them on your bed

they were some seriously nice flowers

you noticed them as soon as you walked in and your heart swelled

unfortunately that wasnt the only thing that swelled

you were allergic to pollen, and your eyes had puffed up slightly, itching a little and you had some sniffles

that was another L for hyuck

and he ran, he fucking booked it out of his little hiding spot back to his common room aka the dungeon

"YUTA I FAILED"

"how the fuck do you fail giving someone flowers hyuck?"

"shes fucking allergic"

so you never found out who gave you flowers

but

but you did keep them, despite your obvious physical irritation to them

they were pretty :(((

so you pressed them into a random notebook you found, because seriously you couldnt just chuck them out

unfortunately for hyuck, he was not so slick to mark who narrowed his eyes on the boy

he knew something was up

what kind of torture device was flowers ?? this was too soft

and so he found out that the same boy who had been making your life a little

how should i say

s p i c y

had a fat crush on you and was just a pouty baby who wanted your love and attention

cute

mark didnt know whether to support this?? like ?? he knew that underneath your front of disliking the long legged boy, you had some feelings, maybe small but they were there

you wouldve called it fondness

because

i promise youre not a sadist or masochist

but you would see him in class

he was very focused and had a beautiful smile

and laugh

he may come across a little... stand offish and arrogant at first but hes actually a kind soul

from how he made a mess in the grand hall but when he thought everyone was gone, he stayed behind to help clean it, having fun conversations with the staff (elves? who tf cleans the great hall??)

that goddamn melodious laughter constantly ringing in your head

shawtys like a melody in my head

but moving on

you noticed the pranks he pull decreased

and that was because he was spending time with yuta and mark, planning the perfect, foolproof (unfortunately not jeno this time) way to confess

and he sent you small smiles ?? what ??

this is so unlike the hyuck you knew

like he did a 180

i did a full 180 baby crazy

i said this was gonna be less crackish but when regular comes on and you hear jaehyuns queso line you cant not feel qUirKy

(bbq- bb—s mY DIAMONDS I DONT NEED NO LIGHT TO SHINE- jungwoo)

okay so the next plan

you loved quidditch too, mainly because your brother was the captain for the gryffindor team

so the plan was for you to attend the slytherin v gryffindor match and

mark somewhat willingly agreed to have a friendly match so that hyuck could show off his skills

this was an awful plan

because it was raining the day of the match

so you and jisung huddled together for warmth, shivering as you watched the match

and hyuck couldnt feel worse, he felt like you were now going to be sick because of him

damn, you really couldnt catch a break

the groan of pure frustration yuta let out was amusing at least

he was just as invested in this as haechan at this point

like he was germinating a seed??? he was fathering this relationship

so with another L, haechan felt super super bad

and this baby cooked for you

he got his best friend jaemin to teach him how to make chicken soup

because you were actually not a herbivore

(thats the category i put vegans and vegetarians in)

omnivore tings

so he carried his little pot of soup, his fingers kind of burning as it was piping hot

he legit walked right past a suffering jisung in the slytherin dorm, the pot of soup still in hand not even sparing a thought about taking pity on the poor kid and giving him some

so he walked to your dorm, being let in by mark who was being big bro™️ and looking after your sick ass

you looked dead

pale skin, eyes closed, lips tinted blue, your body was shivering but you felt fucking boiling

peak peak times

but haechan still thought you looked gorgeous

mark vacated the dorms, leaving to his lessons so hyuck could look after you

this wasnt a plan ?? but hyuck rolled with it

setting his lil pot down he sat in a seat next to you, staring at your asleep awake form with closed eyes

his eyes held so much love and adoration for you, you really are lucky

he took off his robe, just sitting there in his shirt, trousers and green tie and watching you sleep

you were actually awake, just vibing and breathing to stay alive

and he had a lot on his chest

"i know ive been a massive prick to you and im really sorry. i know you’re asleep right now but im too much of a coward to say this to your face. i really only just wanted your attention because i seem to have feelings for you and i am sincerely sorry for going about it the wrong way"

your ears were {}

wide open

boy were you listening and taking this all in

oh shit

realizashun xx

so you fluttered your eyes open gently, watching his face morph into an expression of pure terror from his previous one of literal love

*whipping noise*

"youre awake!" he squeaked out, eyes darting around the room to look at anything but you

which you couldnt help but smile at

shifting to the side in your bed slightly, you lifted the covers, lazily patting the now open space

"c’mere"

your voice was kind of croaky and hoarse

that made hyuck feel guilty

baby it wasn’t your fault

but he complied, kicking off his leather school shoes and sliding besides you, staying as far away from you as possible

not to offend you, his heart was just going a million miles a second and there was no way you wouldn’t be able to hear it

this boy was like blushy sausage face part 2

arrogant hyuck has left the chat

you pouted seeing him shuffle away from you, shuffling to move yourself closer instead

power move, he either had to cuddle with you or fall off the bed

"can we just forget what i said earlier?"

that made you frown

the fuck?

hell no

"hyuck wait-"

"no dont bring it up its embarrassing"

whiny baby is back

"hyuck i-"

"nope nope nope nope"

"LET ME SPEAK FOR FUCKS SAKE"

he had no choice but to listen

your voice sounded strained already and he didnt want to make you feel worse

"i have feelings for you too you big baby"

double take

you what now?

haechans mouth just kinda froze open

so you shut his jaw gently

cant let him get jaw ache

"wait what?"

his soul has returned

he felt elated, completely happy, dare i say like he was high on a drug and said drug was not THC it was your TLC (LMAO GET IT IM PROUD OF THAT)

and so thats how mark returned to your dorm room to see you and hyuck cuddled in your bed, your head laying on his chest as his chin rested on your head, nuzzling into your hair (which was still half seafoam green might i add)

hyuck wasnt awake to celebrate, so yumark had their own small celebration, counting this as their success

you only found out he had put the flowers on your bed about two months after you started dating

a month after that you read the letter he gave you

[hysteriium]

Can’t Help Falling In Love

(A/N): Okay so I originally made this for one of my bois @jane-may​ though I extend it to everyone who’s having a tough time! Y’all are strong and I stan you! 

Summary: Arthur calms you down during a panic attack. 

Pairing: Arthur Fleck x reader. 

Word Count: 2465.

Warnings: mentions of anxiety; 

////

Anxiety Headcanons: 

Incredibly understanding - he’s well acquainted with anxiety and just how bad it can be. So, he knows or at least likes to think he knows, how to help. 

While he had to endure a lot of it alone, he doesn’t want you to suffer the same fate - that’s literally the last thing he wants. 

His favourite thing to do is try and distract you, to try and get you to focus on your surroundings, as opposed to the actual symptoms themselves; uses the 5-4-3-2-1 technique. 

Will tell you to take deep breaths as he seats you somewhere comfortable, either the couch or the bed. 

If you weren’t home, he’d promptly pull you aside and pull you into him, whispering soothing things into your ear; a gentle hand would reach up and rest against the back of your head as he did so. 

Whether you were having panic attacks, negative thoughts/spirals, or perhaps, the whole shabang, he’d tell you how much he loved you and how proud he was of you for coming as far as you had. 

He’s a sap, meaning he’d downright compliment and praise you until his face turned blue (lol). He wouldn’t let you doubt yourself, and if you didn’t believe his reassurances, he would 100% make it his mission to prove it. 

Lots and lots of kisses. Hands, cheeks, your forehead - you name it. 

Arthur is BIG on affection. He really loves hugs, and he feels as though a really long one could solve any problem. 

Literally hates seeing you sad and stressed, so he’ll tell you one of his jokes from his journal. Anything to distract you. 

Sometimes he does panic when you have a particularly bad attack. It isn’t because he’s overwhelmed, it’s more so him freaking out about how his tactics aren’t working - about how he’s unable to assist. He’d pretty much feel helpless. Like stated earlier, he really hates seeing you so distressed. 

Regardless, he sticks by you for however long you need. He wouldn’t dream of leaving you in the middle of an attack. 

One of his favourite things to do when he sees you stressing is to play with your hair or trace soothing patterns into your skin.  

After the attack - HE WILL DANCE WITH YOU. 

SORRY, THIS IS NOT OPTIONAL. 

This bad boi will pull you into his arms and start swaying with you to some funky jazz tunes whether you like it or not. 

Will not stop until he’s seen you laugh, or, at the very least, smile. 

////

Today had definitely not been your day. While you had been on edge for most of it, feeling the sinister itch of anxiety in the back of your mind, you tried your hardest to work through it; to get on with your day. Some part of you, faded along with the negative thoughts - a gut feeling - knew, however. Knew that the crucial question wasn’t if you were going to have a panic attack - it was when. In all cases, it felt inevitable. 

Rain pelted the window - Gotham’s signature song as you found yourself alone in Arthur’s apartment. He’d left a little bit ago, promising to only be a moment as he mumbled something about groceries. 

In the space of what had probably been an hour since Arthur’s departure, your theory had been correct. Like the opportunistic beast it was, your anxiety had decided it was the perfect time to flare up. The telltale signs - ragged breathing, the hammering of your heart which matched the booming of thunder, upon the multitudinous concoction of other symptoms created the perfect storm; much like the one outside. 

As the seconds passed and the poor weather continued its total pandemonium, your neurotic state worsened. The last straw was when your chest started to close up, constricting as if you had been sat on; about to be crushed. Familiar were the knots in your stomach, twisting and turning. 

In one cataclysmically exhausting whirlwind of thoughts, one that virtually took all your energy to keep at bay, you felt the jitters in your leg and the compulsive fidgeting which followed behind, manifest. In the dim lighting of the room, you curled up into the sofa’s side, trying to remember what you had been taught for times precisely like these. How you were meant to breathe, use your logic, even if you were, for the most part, stripped of it. To try and focus on other things, repeat the mantras that you had once found calming. You conjured the reassuring voice of your lover, remembering Arthur’s soothing words and how he worked you through prior attacks.  

Yet still, you couldn’t breathe.

Perhaps luck had been shining down on you in that moment. You certainly felt so when you heard ruckus behind the front door. The key scraped against the lock, a recurring phenomenon which was then followed by a soft curse, leading to Arthur’s eventual success as he stumbled inside. 

“I’m ba-” 

Arthur froze when he saw your cowering form. 

He pushed the door closed with his foot, knowing immediately what was happening and abruptly dropped the bag of groceries onto the floor with a thud. Without stopping, he hurried over. 

“Hey, hey, look at me,” his voice sweetly requested as a hand gently moved your face to look down at him. 

In his crouched position his leg was tucked underneath him while his other rested against the couch’s foundations. Arthur’s thumb started to rub soothing circles into your flesh once his hands fell to yours, immediately snapping to your action plan. 

“Tell me five things you can see.”

Nodding, you obeyed. The mere euphony of his utterance already had you calming, a tender warmth which began to thaw out anxiety’s glaciers. After your eyes darted across the room, you listed the first things you could see. 

“I-I” You swallowed as you tried to get a grapple on your wobbling vocals, “I see the curtains.”

“Tell me about them.”

 “They’re hideous,” You replied, prompting a laugh from your lover. The delicate creases around his eyes - laughter lines - had been enough to momentarily halt your disquietude, a short-lived delight replacing it. 

“What else?”

“An-and I see Murray.”

You moved to point towards the tv in front of you. Arthur moved aside when your wobbly arm extended. A small smile graced his features when he drank in the man dancing along to the intro, perfectly in time with the sporadic notes of the live band. 

No matter how much he loved the show however, he loved you more. This was evident in the way he quickly turned back to you, a silent signal to continue; to reduce your apprehensive state. While the twitching of your fingers was yet to pause, their ache to squirm overbearing, you were sure Arthur picked up on the way your breathing had started to regulate.

“Um, the” your eyes darted to the floor, your toes wiggling against the fluffy feeling of the synthetic fibres, “the carpet...”

Moving your foot slightly, you watched as the action revealed a sinister blob. You weren’t entirely sure how it got there, even Arthur was confused when you had casually brought it up. Arthur must’ve followed your gaze because you both spoke at the same time.   

“And its stupid stain-”

 “The stain.” 

You breathed through your nostrils in a subtle amusement as his lips upturned; relishing in fact he knew you so well. You hadn’t been kind to that rug, not even in its debut, and you knew he felt as though he was more likely to witness hell freeze over before he’d witness you display a shred of warmth towards the piece. 

Once more, your eyes bounced around the room to find another object. Placed delicately against the closed window, you noticed small green stems protruding from a red brick coloured pot. 

“The plant we’ve somehow managed to keep alive.” 

An arrangement of white rings wrapped around each extension, the mere sight of the potted plant brought on a deep fondness - reminiscence with a tone of yellow; of sunshine and fresh air. You and Arthur had somehow ended up buying a zebra succulent. It was an impulsive decision, one that had almost led to its unfortunate death an embarrassing number of times. 

From overwatering to all too friendly bursts of wind threatening to topple the plant, to forgetting to water it entirely, the succulent that had been named ‘Victory’ for its unlikely survival. Most certainly a hero to all succulents out there, the flora continued to trudge on, despite life having tested it. In some strange way, the plant had binded the ends of your relationship together, strengthening it with a flame - prevented it fraying. 

  “Victory…” Arthur furrowed his brows, “Tory.” 

“Tory,” you repeated, smiling. 

“One more left,” he squeezed your hand. 

Your eyes remained on him, flickering over his dishevelled appearance. You had only managed to notice his state then, with the heavy burden of worry elevated. His hair was wet, soaking really, and his clothes were just as much. It was a miracle he wasn’t shivering. 

“You’re all wet.” 

His brows upturned at your laughter, his own amusement following behind. He mumbled something about managing to keep undercover for the most part, and the imagery of him trying to do so was something you found adorably amusing. 

You had somehow forgotten about the turbulence of the weather, and when you were so rudely reminded with a clap, you jumped. It had caught you off guard, and the sound was so loud it shook the window frame. Whether that was just the shitty Gotham apartment you found yourself in, or if it had hit the building you weren’t sure. 

Arthur perked up when he saw you jump at the thunder, his lips instinctively pressing against the soft skin of your hand, leaving a warm tingle. 

“You’re okay,” he whispered, “you’re doing so well.” 

“Now tell me, what can you touch?” 

“Your hands…” you gave them a quick squeeze before pulling away, his arms moving to rest against his knee while yours moved to your sides. 

“The couch.” 

Arthur nodded at your words, his bright blue eyes reflecting encouragement. 

“My hair,” you said, twirling a strand with your trembling hands.

“Your hair” you laughed again when they dove into his wet locks. Arthur scrunched up his nose and shut his eyes with a smile. Then, he shook his head against your hand. The goofy action sprayed gentle droplets of water on your skin, making you giggle in surprise. 

His hands interlocked with yours once more.  

“What can you hear?”

“Rain...cars.” 

“Gotham never sleeps,” Arthur quipped. 

By then, your breathing had completely righted itself, a lot of your symptoms had dissipated, and you were starting to find yourself more grounded in the moment. Thoughts no longer raced. Hot and cold flushes no longer gripped you. You had started to feel some semblance of control. 

“Smell?”

“Vanilla - the candle I lit earlier...your...your cologne.” 

The scents tickled your nose, the latter smell, Arthur’s cologne, a particularly welcoming scent. You mentioned often enough how much you liked it, and it was apparent it was no coincidence that he started wearing more of it. 

“And finally, what can you taste?” 

“Strawberry lip balm,” your nose wrinkled as you focused on the strange flavour. 

Arthur gave you a funny look, one that challenged your disgust. 

“Trust me, it’s not as good as it sounds.” 

“Let me check,” a cheeky grin befell your lover.    

You responded by playfully pushing his shoulder. In seconds, he had shot up from the ground, hands latching onto your forearms, pulling you up with him. A surprised gasp left your mouth, though it hardly wiped off Arthur’s evident joy. With a certain finesse, the man twirled you into him, his lips finding yourself sweetly. They moved against yours, a simple, yet mind-numbing act; an act in which completely transformed the last of your nerves into dazzling butterflies. 

When Arthur eventually pulled away, his stunning eyes searched yours for any traces of your panic. 

“You’re right, it’s not as good as it sounds,” he said, urging you to jokingly roll your eyes. 

“How are you feeling?” 

“Better now,” you giggled, brushing your nose against his.

The smile was still yet to leave him when he gradually pulled away, arms leaving your waist, “wait here.”

You watched him skip to his record player - a beautiful antique thing. It was a delicate and cherished object, one adored by the man who was about to place a record into it. As the circular frame was hidden from your perspective, you were forced to wait, rendering the song a complete and utter mystery. His skilful movements eventually produced a scratch, and then, a song. 

It was a song you instantly recognised. 

Wise men say only fools rush in

The realisation made you giggle while his twirling form made his way towards you. 

But I can’t help falling in love with you

Shall I stay?

You watched his shoulders sway with the tune, and the way his feet moved oh so gracefully - better than you could ever hope to coordinate.

Would it be a sin?

If I can’t help falling in love with you?

Then, suddenly, he was in front of you, hovering over you while an inviting hand extended. When you wordlessly accepted, you were suddenly in his arms again. 

Like a river flows surely to the sea

Darling so it goes

Some things are meant to be

His guiding hands found your waist, encouraging their soft sways. As music filled the apartment, your worries melted away. No longer conscious of the storm outside, which had yet to halt. No, you were transported into your own personal bliss, your head resting fondly on Arthur’s shoulder. Anxiety was no more than a distant memory, no longer gripping you in an iron chokehold; it had evanesced entirely. 

Take my hand, take my whole life too

For I can’t help falling in love with you

Before you knew it, the song neared its end, and Arthur’s frame had pulled away to glance at you.

“For I can’t help falling in love with you,” he sang adoringly, finishing the lyrics with a lightness. His eyes then flickered towards your lips. 

Not missing a beat, you softly captured his in another kiss. Tilting your head to deepen the affection, your arms crossed behind his neck. Your giddiness went straight to your head, leaving you dizzy, while the swirls of infatuation bubbled from deep within.

When you finally pulled away, his head rested against your forehead. Nothing else mattered in that moment - not even Arthur’s drenched clothes. All that mattered was the way you felt in his arms.

Just him. 

[hawkinshellfire]

Right Where You Left Me

Chapter 12 - Lover

 Chapter 12 - Lover

  We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January

And this is our place, we make the rules

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you dear

Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?

“Let me help you with that.”

 “I can do it,” Joyce says stubbornly.

 “What the hell is in there?” Hopper asks, pointing to Joyce’s duffel bag. 

 “Clothes?” she replies.

 “Why do you need so many?”

 “We’re going for two weeks, Hop.”

 “The cabin isn’t that far, we can always come back if you need more clothes.”

 “But then we have to come back to reality and I was planning on spending two weeks very far away from it,” she smirks. 

 “You aren’t saying that because there are a bunch of books in that bag, are you?”

 “There may be  one, ” she admits, “but it’s not what I plan on distracting myself with.”

 She steps towards him, drops her bag on the floor next to his feet and runs her palm along his chest. Rocking forward on her toes, she brushes her nose against his and pulls back with a devilish smile.

 “Tease,” he calls after her. 

 Joyce looks back and tosses a wink over her shoulder then reaches for her bag and walks it over to Hopper’s car.

 “Jesus son, get her bag,” Mr. Hopper remarks as he comes up behind them.

 “She won’t let me,” he tells his father, “I offered.”

 “You make sure you take good care of Joyce while you two are up there. And be sure to stack some extra wood so you don’t run out. Remember, you can always come back early if you need anything.”

 “Don’t worry dad, we’ll be fine.”

 “Joyce, if this one starts causing you too much trouble you make sure to give him hell, yeah,”

 “Will do Mr. Hopper,” Joyce smiles. 

 They arrive at Hopper’s grandfather's cabin just after lunch. The wooden house, surrounded by a wrap-around porch, sat in the middle of the woods near a small pond. 

 Joyce excitedly leaps out of the car, leaving Hopper to get the bags while she checks out the cottage. 

 There was an old fabric couch in the center of the room across from a large fireplace, a small kitchen with a yellow fridge and a bedroom and adjacent bathroom off to the side. 

 Her heart leaps when she realizes there is only one bed, despite knowing that she was going to get to spend every evening curled into Hopper’s side and every morning waking next to him, the reality settles in and makes it all seem so real. They were going to have two uninterrupted weeks together and she was giddy with excitement.

 Hopper comes up behind her and drops their bags to the floor, his arms circling around her waist while he drops his head to her shoulder.

 “So? What do you think?”

 “It’s perfect,” she smiles.

 He squeezes her, pressing their cheeks together before placing a kiss on the top of her head and moving to the kitchen. 

 “Why don’t we unpack and stack some firewood before I make us some dinner?”

 “Sounds nice.”

 He begins to unload the freezer bag, filling the fridge with goodies while Joyce slowly walks around the cabin and admires the art hanging on the walls. A photo of Hopper and a man she assumed to be his grandfather hung over the mantle. 

 Running her fingers along the throw blanket hanging over the back of the couch, she wanders into the bedroom. 

 This was the perfect place to spend the next few weeks. Away from the chaos that consumed real life, she could focus on the two of them. Just her and Hop. The world could wait. 

 Peering out the window over the bed, she smiles at the swans swimming in the lake and moves closer. 

 “Joyce?” Hopper calls from the kitchen. 

 “Yes?”

 “Do you want one burger or two?” 

 “Two please!”

 “Great. It’ll be ready in a few minutes.”

.

.

She’s nervous. Hopper can tell by the way her hands are folded in her lap and her shoulders are slumped. They’re sitting at the two person table located next to the kitchen, enjoying the burgers he prepared for them. 

 “You’re quiet,” he observes out loud.

 “Sorry, I was just thinking,” she admits.

 “About?”

 “How nice this is,” she smiles softly. “The food is good.”

 “Joyce,” he says in a near whisper. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

 “I’m just a little nervous,” she tells him. 

 “Nervous?”

 “It sounds stupid,” she looks down. 

 “It’s not stupid,” he reassures her. 

 “What if after this week you decide that you don’t want this?”

 “I’ve wanted this for a long time, I was just afraid to admit it to myself,” he tells her, reaching for her hand over the table. 

 “But what if it’s too much, spending all this time alone together? Doesn’t it just feel so - serious?”

 “Come with me,” he demands, standing up and tugging her towards the living room. 

 She follows his lead curiously, their hands still wound together and she watches as he excitedly brings them towards a stack of old boxes. 

 He drops her hand and begins rummaging through the cardboard boxes one by one. Triumphantly, he turns back to her holding up a string of multi-coloured Christmas lights.

 “Lights?” she says confused.

 “We’re going to put them up. Make things more fun,” he explains. 

 “But it’s summer?”

 “So?” he shrugs, “who says we can’t put the lights up whenever we want? This is our house, we make the rules.”

 Skeptically, she accepts one end of the light strand and stares up at him. “You really want to put them up?”

 “Absolutely! Go grab me that tape in the kitchen.”

 When Joyce returns with the tape, Hopper already has three strands of lights stretched out along the floor. She passes him the tape and waits for instruction while noticing he put a record on. 

 The soft sounds of jazz fill the cabin only ceasing when a crackling sound from the old needle in the vinyl interrupts. 

 The two work to string up the lights in tandem, Joyce ripping off pieces of tape and Hopper using the pieces to attack the multicoloured bulbs to the ceiling. Only when the ceiling has become a sea of reds, blues and greens do they take a step back to admire their handiwork. 

 A strange comforting sensation overcomes Joyce as she stares up at the lights with her arms folded across her chest. Somehow, Hopper knew this would comfort her. She adored him for always knowing exactly what she needed. 

 From behind her, he watches as she marvels at the decorations and proudly smiles to himself. 

 “May I have this dance?” he asks.

 Feeling calm and bold, Joyce accepts his hand and allows him to twirl her into him. She crashes into his chest laughing and smiles up at him while he brushes her hair out of her eyes. 

 “Feeling better?” 

 “Much,” she smiles. “Thank you. You’re always so full of surprises.”

 “Speaking of surprises,” he grins and releases her, “I have one more.”

 He disappears into the bedroom and re-emerges holding a Polaroid camera.

 Proudly, he holds it up and snaps a photo of Joyce beneath the lights. 

 “Where did you get that?”

 “My parents said we could borrow it. Smile.”

 Embarrassed, Joyce pulls her arms around her chest and casts her gaze to the floor while he snaps another photo. 

 “You don’t have to do that,” he says softly, stepping towards her. “You know you’re beautiful.”

 The moment she smiles at his compliment, Hopper snaps another photo and lets it fall to the floor. “There’s  the smile.”

 Joyce gestures for the camera with an open palm and takes it in both hands when Hopper hands it over. 

 She raises it and snaps a photo of him, allowing it to fall to the floor alongside the one of her. 

 Hopper scoops both photos up from the wooden floorboard and turns them towards her. In her photo, Joyce looks petite beneath the lights and her smile takes up most of her face, while Hopper has his eyes closed and his nose scrunched in his photo. 

 “Oh god let’s get rid of that,” she says, pointing to the picture of her.

 “Not a chance. This might be one of my favourite pictures of you.”

 “You’re kidding?”

 “Nope. You look perfect.”

 The pair fools around with the camera some more before clearing their dishes and working as a team to wash and dry the plates. Joyce yawns as they work and nods when Hopper asks if she’s ready for bed. 

 He allows her to go into the bedroom ahead of him to change into her pyjamas. When he joins her a few moments later, he finds her propped up against a pillow in a pair of sweatpants and an old shirt with a book in her lap. 

 With a childish grin, he snaps a photo of her before setting the camera down on the nightstand and joining her. 

 “What was that for?!” she exclaims when the flash goes off.

 “I just want to remember this moment.”

 He slips beneath the covers next to her and uses one arm to pull her closer to his side. 

 “Do you mind if I read?” she asks. 

 “Not at all.”

 Joyce is fast asleep against Hopper’s arm in a matter of moments. Carefully, he places her page holder back into her book and slides the novel from her hands. Once it’s on the table next to the bed, he reaches for the light switch and turns out the lights.

 The next morning, he wakes before her and gently rolls her away from him so he can slip into the kitchen and surprise her with breakfast. He stumbles upon the Polaroids scattered across the floor on his way and decided to put them in a stack on the table.

 The final photo he picks up is the first one he took of Joyce, the one she claimed to hate, but there was something about it that made him want to preserve the memory. So, he slips it into his wallet before beginning to prepare eggs and toast. 

 .

.

That afternoon, Joyce trails behind Hopper as he leads the way to the lake behind the house. He places a blanket down on the grass and begins to unpack the picnic basket he prepared while Joyce stares out over the lake. 

 “It’s so peaceful,” she remarks.

 “It was my favourite place as a kid. Still is.”

 “I can see why. I don’t think I ever want to leave.”

 “Then we’ll stay,” he nods. 

 “Yeah right. Unfortunately, we have to go back to reality eventually,” she sighs.

 “Says who? Who’s to say we can’t just run off and start our adventure out here?”

 “Your parents, for starters,” she points out. 

 Joyce joins Hopper on the blanket he’d delicately laid out for them and folds her legs beneath her. 

 “Nah, I say we do it. Let’s just be crazy impulsive kids and we get the hell out of Hawkins. It’s not like anything ever happens there anyway,” Hopper says. 

 He leans back on his palms, legs outstretched between them and pinches his eyes shut. He knows what he’s saying sounds foolish, but a large part of him would love to leave Hawkins with Joyce and never look back. He hadn’t had a chance to tell Joyce yet, but lately, he’d been dreaming of leaving Hawkins more frequently. His father had been on his case about applying to serve and he wasn’t sure how he felt about it. While he knew it was the right thing to do, he and Joyce had a good thing going here and he didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize that. Was it childish to prioritize his teen romance over the duty he had to his country? Absolutely. But despite his father’s claims that he was a man (who should go and make the Hopper men proud) he was young and in love and a large part of him wanted to remain an impulsive, love-sick kid. 

 “We can’t,” she laughs, “but wouldn’t that be fun?”

 “C’mon Joycie. If we don’t leave now, then when?”

 Joyce laughs, placing her hand daintily on his shoulder, “One day,” she muses. 

 “Besides,” she adds, “we have to go back because I start working in a few weeks.”

 “Of course, my little librarian in training,” he teases. 

 “I’m not a librarian in training! I’m helping out for the summer!” 

 “I’m just teasing you, Joyce, I think it’s great that you’re going to be working at the library.” 

 “Really?”

 “Really. It’s literally the perfect job for you. Besides, now  you  can take me on a date,” he winks. 

 “Speaking of dates, do we get to eat on this one?” she giggles.

 “Of course,” he says, retrieving two wrapped sandwiches from the bag he packed. “Grilled cheese.”

 The two dig in and begin making plans for all the things they want to do during the week when the first drop of rain lands on Joyce’s cheek. Within minutes it’s absolutely pouring and the pair scramble to their feet and prepare to take cover. 

Hand-in-hand, Joyce and Hopper dodge the raindrops as they sprint towards the cabin. When they reach the back steps, Hopper releases Joyce’s hand and pushes the screen door open to let her inside. 

 She’s drenched from head to toe. Her cotton t-shirt now stuck to her chest, showing off her pale purple bra, despite her efforts to stay warm by folding her hands across her chest. 

 Joyce follows him into the main area of the cabin and he shakes his arms and chuckles. 

 “I didn’t see that one coming,” he says. “Come here,” he calls her over when he sees her shiver. “I’ll start a fire so we can warm up.”

 Hair leaving a trail of water droplets on the floor, Joyce makes her way over to the fire where she stands with her palms pressed to her sides while waiting for the fire to start. 

 Hopper rummages around in the pit, eventually turning back towards her once the flames begin to burn to life. “There we go it shouldn’t be long until it warms up.”

 “Thanks, Hop,” she smiles. 

 With his wet hair slicked back and his shirt pressed to his chiselled arms, Joyce has a hard time tearing her gaze away from him. He catches her staring and she quickly looks away. 

 Stepping towards the fire, she stretches her palms out and falls to her knees so that she can be closer to the heat. Hopper follows her lead and kneels down next to her. Outside the sky has turned an ominous grey, leaving the fire to be the main source of light inside the cabin.

 Joyce shivers again and instinctively reaches for the hem of her soaked shirt and pulls it over her head. She notices Hopper staring as she sinks back against her heels and shyly grins at him. 

 “What?” she asks.

 “Nothing,” he lies.

 “You’re supposed to remove wet clothing or you’ll freeze. Hasn’t anyone ever told you that?” 

 “I might have heard it somewhere,” he shrugs. 

 Staring down at her petite frame clad in only her jeans and bra, he slides himself closer and reaches for her shoulder with a calloused hand. 

 Slowly, he runs his thumb along her exposed collarbone and she shivers.

 “Are you still cold?” he asks.

 “No.”

 Gently, his hand glides down her arm and he moves closer, taking up the majority of the space in her orbit.

 They lock eyes as his hand falls from her arm before he reaches for the hem of his own shirt and tosses it somewhere behind him. 

 Her palm settles on his bare chest and Joyce looks up at Hopper through hooded eyes. His heart lurches at the way the fire makes her face glow. She looked absolutely radiant. 

 “Hop,” her voice snaps him out of his trance.

 “Yeah?”

 “You’re staring.”

 “Sorry, it’s just. Jesus Joyce, you’re beautiful.”

 Unsure of how to respond, she leans forwards, placing both hands on Hopper's shoulders and kisses him,  hard .

 He responds by placing open palms on her bareback and tugging her as close as their knees will allow. 

 Hands roaming Joyce’s bare-back, Hopper begins to kiss along her jawline and down her neck. She tilts her head back in response, granting him more access. 

 From where they sit on their knees, their upper limbs tangled, Joyce reaches for the button in Hopper’s jeans and undoes it while he licks along her collarbone. His palm settles on her inner thigh and the soaked material of her jeans suddenly becomes hot beneath his touch. 

 When kneeling becomes an inconvenience and they are forced to part for breath, Hopper looks over at Joyce with a caring smile and whispers.

 “Can I try something?”

 She nods in response, a mixture of nerves and excitement.

 “Lay back,” he whispers.

 He guides her as she lays against the blanket on the floor and slowly slides himself down her body. When he reaches her naval he pauses before looking up and locking eyes with her. 

 “Is this alright?” he asks.

 She nods again.

 Wordlessly, he helps her slide out of her soaked pants and tosses them to the side. Leaning down, he places a hesitant kiss on her inner thigh and she trembles. 

 He reaches towards the elastic waistband of her cotton panties and again pauses to smile up at her. 

 “It’s okay,” she gives him permission before he has a chance to ask. 

 Joyce draws in a deep breath as Hopper once again kisses her inner thigh. 

 Her hands lay limply at her sides but she immediately reaches for his hair when he uses his tongue to lick along her center in one fluid motion.

 He smirks as she bucks forward, the hand clutching his hair a sign that she’s enjoying this but he wants to be sure so he asks again.

 “Is this-?”

 “ Yes, ” she hisses before he can finish asking, the desperateness in her tone something he’s never heard before. 

 Once again, he leans forward and runs his tongue along her slit, this time following the motion up by teasing her with his index finger. 

 Joyce tightens her grip on him and admires the way his flexed arms look in the firelight. Propped up on her elbows and sprawled out on a blanket in front of the fire, she closes her eyes and tosses her head back while Hopper’s head bobs between her thighs. 

 It isn’t long before she’s trembling beneath him, coming undone around his tongue while she whispers his name harshly beneath her breath. 

 They manage to stumble their way through the dimly lit cabin towards the bedroom afterwards, where Hopper manages to make Joyce come undone yet again. 

.

.

 After breakfast the next morning, Joyce finds herself wrapped in one of Hopper’s flannels while they sit on the back step and watch the sunrise over the water. 

 With the sky painted a faint shade of pink and the stillness of the water only shifting beneath the ducks that swim across, it felt like a scene from a movie. Leaning her head on Hopper’s shoulder, she reaches for their shared cigarette and takes a long drag. 

 They sit in silence for the majority of the morning, Hopper occasionally shifting next to Joyce when he reaches into his back pocket for another smoke. She keeps her open palm resting on his lap, where he’s tracing gentle circles with the edge of his thumb.

 Before lighting another, he shimmies from beneath her and cups her cheek in his hand, sliding his thumb along the curve of her jaw before his fingers settle on the nape of her neck and he brushes her lips with a gentle kiss. She smiles against his lips, caught off guard by his abrupt, tender action.

 He chuckles under his breath when he feels her smile and she demands to know why he’s laughing.

 “What’s so funny?”

 “You’re smiling,” he teases with a grin.

 “Well, it’s your fault for kissing me like that!”

 “I couldn’t help myself.”

 Their laughter fades and Joyce shifts back into her previous position with her head resting on his shoulder. 

 “What are you thinking about?” she asks. 

 “How much I love you.”

 “No you were not,” she forces a laugh. At this point in their relationship, it wasn’t unusual for Hopper to tell Joyce he loved her. Though she’d yet to say it back, she adored the way he’d become comfortable with saying the words to her. He seemed to like to remind her with any chance he got and she received butterflies in her stomach each time the words rolled off his tongue. She also knew that he wasn’t hurt by the fact she hadn’t said it back. He wanted her to mean it when she said it and she was confident that when the time came, she would. Besides, she was certain that she loved him, she was simply unsure of how to process those feelings.

 “I was,” he admits. “I think I’ll love you forever.”

 “You can’t love someone forever, it’s not possible.”

 “Fine. Then I’ll love you until the clocks stop ticking.”

 “What does that even mean?” she challenges. 

 “It means exactly what you think it means. My heart will belong to you until the clock stops ticking.”

 “Hop, the clock is always going to tick, that’s the entire point of time.”

 “Exactly. So you know I’ll love you long after we’re both gone too.”

 “That’s morbid,” she teases.

 “It’s romantic.”

 “Says who?”

 “Me.”

 After a few moments of silence, he speaks again. “I mean it, Joyce. ‘Till the clock stops ticking.”

.

.

That evening, Hopper invites Joyce to join him fishing but she declines and opts to spend her evening reading instead. After he sets out with his tackle box, wearing a hat Joyce describes as “ridiculously cute” she draws herself a bath and climbs into the tiny tub with plans to finish her novel. 

 It’s a quiet evening, the only sounds interrupting her thoughts coming from the crickets that begin to chirp with the rising moon. She loses herself in a world of fiction within moments and without a window in the bathroom, there is no way to tell how long she’s been reading. It’s perfect and blissful and everything she never knew she needed. 

 With a few chapters to go, Joyce places her bookmark between the pages and drops her head back against the tub, pinching her eyes closed as she absorbs the calmness the silence brings. 

 Moments later, the creaking of the floorboards on the back deck announces Hopper’s return and she finds herself smiling. 

 “Joyce?” he calls out as he enters the cabin.

 “In here!” she yells through the semi-shut door to the bathroom. 

 The sound of his footsteps gets louder as he nears the door and she hears him come to an abrupt halt just outside the door.

 “You can come in,” she laughs in an almost teasing tone. “I was just reading in the bath.”

 “Are you sure?”

 “Yes.”

 He pushes the door to the bathroom back slowly, the mere thought of Joyce sitting naked already overstimulating his senses. He finds her sitting in a tub with hardly any bubbles, book in hand. 

 “How was fishing?” she asks without looking up.

 “Not bad. Caught a few,” he says, though his focus is elsewhere. “How was your evening?”

 “Wonderful,” she beams, “I’m almost done with my book.”

 “I’ll leave you to finish it then,” he offers, rocking back on his heels.

 “Stay,” she whispers. 

 “I don’t know if you’ve noticed how small that tub is Joyce but I don’t think we’re both going to fit,” he chuckles.

 “I meant here,” she pats the empty air next to her. “Sit with me.”

 “Alright. Why don’t I read the rest to you?”

 “Really?”

 “Really.”

 Hopper waddles over to the side of the tub and plops himself down onto the tile floor. With his legs outstretched he reaches for Joyce’s novel, careful not to lose the page she’s on. 

 He begins to read, pausing every now and then to admire how she crinkles her nose when she becomes invested in a particular sentence. 

 “Earth to Hop,” she reaches over the side of the tub and waves a hand in his face. “Why did you stop reading?”

 “I got distracted.” 

 “By what? You were  literally  reading the words off the page.”

 “By  you ,” he smirks, lowering the book. 

 Hopper places the novel down on the floor next to him and pushes himself to his feet. With a dopey grin, he grips both sides of the tube and looks down at Joyce. Her eyes widen when she realizes what he’s about to do and a shriek escapes her lips just as he slips into the water, fully clothed. He hovers over her to steal a kiss and brushes her cheek with a soap-soaked palm. 

 “Turns out we both do fit,” he beams.

 “Barely,” she laughs. 

 Waiting until Hopper climbs out of the tub, his clothes heavy from the weight of the water and pressed to his body, Joyce grabs a towel and dries her hair before stepping out after him. She stands before him in nothing but a tiny towel and smiles shyly. 

 No words are exchanged. He glides towards her in three large steps and cups her face in his palms. He walks them backwards, towards the door and down the hall while they kiss. They bump into the doorway and two parts of the wall before making it to the bedroom, where Hopper lifts Joyce and carries her towards the bed. She wraps her legs around his centre and allows her fingers to dance through the baby hairs at the base of his neck while he carries her across the room. 

 After placing her down on the bed, her petite frame still damp from the bath, he looks down at her with hungry eyes. 

 “I’m not made of glass Hop. I’m not going to break,” she reminds him. 

 He nods.

 Desperately, he moves forward to close the distance between them, greedily gripping the back of her neck while snaking his tongue into her mouth. She reaches for the hem of his soaked shirt and helps him remove it. His belt and bottoms are quick to follow and their damp naked bodies collide once again while their kisses grow sloppier and more desperate. 

 They tumble to the left and Joyce finds herself in a position to climb on top of Hopper. Straddling him, she looks down at him with wide eyes and grins. In a hushed tone, speaks while running her hands down his bare torso. “Tell me what you want.”

 It’s a question while simultaneously a demand and it sparks something animalistic inside of him. He tosses both arms around her waist, tugging her closer while his lips curl up into a massive smirk. He presses them against hers hard, the force of them catching her off guard. Hopper pulls back slightly so that his lips ghost over hers while he speaks and in a deep sultry tone he replies, “I just want you.”

 Cupping her chin in his palm, he greedily kisses her before leaning back against the pillows, tugging her with him while whispering, “Come here.”

.

.

 Sitting on the back porch steps, Joyce passes her joint to Hopper and smirks when he coughs on his initial inhale. After a few hours of trying to convince him to get high with her, Hopper had finally conceded and agreed to split a joint with Joyce. He’d been high a handful of times in the past but was always hesitant when it came to smoking. On the other hand, Joyce enjoyed an occasional joint whenever she could. She found it eased the chaos swirling in her mind and it served as an escape from the hell that was her Hawkins life. She had never, however, been high with Hopper.

 She watches as he focuses on his breathing and laughs beneath her breath. It was so typical of him to try and be good at everything; even something like this. As if on cue, Hopper inhales incorrectly and begins coughing.

 “Jesus Joyce, how do you smoke this stuff?”

 “They are no worse than your nasty cigarettes,” she says. 

 “They’re way worse! I don’t even think you can compare them.”

 “I can and I will. Your cigarettes are ten times worse.”

 “Agree to disagree?” he asks.

 “Fine. But you know I’m right.”

 “I never said that.”

 “You didn’t not say it.”

 “You’re infuriating.”

 “You find it fascinating.”

 “What can I say, you intrigue me,” he admits.

 “Does that mean once you get me all figured out you’ll get bored?”

 “Bored? Of you ? Not possible.”

 “Oh c’mon. You won’t be bored of me a few years from now?”

 “I won’t be bored of you a hundred years from now,” Hopper smiles at her. 

 “Now I  know  you’re lying,” she half-laughs.

 “I’m being serious Joyce. It’s me and you from now on. Come here,” he says, standing up and gesturing for her to do the same.

 Joyce slowly rises to her feet and follows Hopper into the cabin. He marches straight towards the support beam next to the couch and fetches a pocket knife from his pants. 

 “What are you doing?” she asks when he raises the blade to the wood.

 “Carving our initials.”

 The next forty-five minutes are spent carving their initials into a heart while discussing the exciting future plans they both had. 

.

.

A day before they were set to return home from the cabin, Benny and his girlfriend Helen drove up to spend the night with them. The day was packed with outdoor activities and by the time the four of them settled around a campfire with some beers, Joyce was absolutely drained. She curls herself against Hopper’s chest, not caring that Benny or Helen may find it odd that she chooses to sit in his lap. 

 They decide on playing truth or dare. Despite Joyce’s initial protests that it was a childish game, she finds herself having fun. 

 “Alright Joyce, truth or dare,” Helen asks.

 “Truth,” she responds. 

 “Tell us about your first kiss with Jim.”

 Joyce blushes and casts her gaze downwards before beginning to speak. Rather than describe the kiss they shared at her party, she begins describing a party they both attended in the ninth grade.

 Hopper nearly chokes on his drink when she begins telling the story, knowing exactly which story it is. All these years and he never thought she remembered that kiss. They were both drunk (her far more than him) and it was never mentioned again. It hadn’t even been mentioned now that they were together, which further convinced him she had no memory of it happening. 

  .

“Joyce!” A young drunken Hopper called after Joyce as she sprinted from the party. “Joyce, wait up!”

  When he finally catches up to her on the sidewalk, he’s out of breath and panting. 

  “What is it Hop?” she asks with an exhausted sigh. 

  “Don’t let them get to you okay? It’s just a stupid game.”

  “A really stupid game,” she mutters. 

  The two of them were attending Randy Smith’s birthday party when a game of spin the bottle broke out. When Joyce refused to participate in such a “childish” game, Randy stood up in front of everyone and exclaimed it must have been because Joyce had never been kissed and everyone laughed. 

  To prove that she was cooler than everyone else, Joyce downed three drinks and stormed away from the party, leaving Hopper to chase after her. 

  Hopper knew that this was the exact reason Joyce hadn’t wanted to play. Just a week prior she was telling him that she wanted her first  real  kiss to be with someone special. She asked if he thought that was stupid and he told her no, in fact, it was sweet. 

  “Can I walk you home?” he asks, noticing that she’s far drunker than she’s letting on.

  “Sure,” she nods. 

  The pair walks home in comfortable silence, Hopper occasionally offering his arm to steady drunken Joyce on the bumpy pavement. Midway through the walk, Joyce starts rambling about the heap of trouble she’ll likely get in at home and that’s when he knows she’s had far too much to drink. She never talked about her home life like this. 

  As they’re approaching her house, Hopper asks if she’ll be alright. She looks him in the eye and meekly smiles before replying that of course, she would be, she always was. 

  Unconvinced, he follows her to the door where he spontaneously wraps his arms around her and makes her promise that she’ll call if she needs anything. 

  While pulling back, he locks eyes with her and before he has the better sense to stop himself, he’s leaning down to place a brief, chaste kiss on her lips. 

  Joyce says nothing in response, instead, she offers him a shy smile and a timid wave as she turns towards the front door. 

  He feels like an ass his entire walk home. She wanted her first kiss to be with someone special and he just took that away from her. With any luck, she wouldn’t remember it and he could carry on as if it never happened. 

  The next day at school she doesn’t mention it and he thinks he might be in the clear. A month later she tells him all about her first kiss with a boy from her art class and he’s convinced she doesn’t remember that night on her porch.

  It was his first kiss too. He never forgets it. 

.

 “That’s so sweet!” Helen coos. 

 “I didn’t know you remembered that,” Hopper whispers to Joyce so that only she can hear. 

 “You never brought it up. I thought you wanted to pretend it hadn’t happened,” she admits. 

 “God no Joyce. I was embarrassed and thought you either didn’t remember or if you did you wish I hadn’t done it. We really did suck at communicating huh?”

 “You did,” Benny interjects. 

 In the midst of their confessions, their whispers had somehow turned into a full-blown conversation without them realizing they had an audience. 

 “Everyone at school has known you two were into each other for years. You’re literally the only ones who couldn’t see it,” he informs them. “I can’t believe it took you two  this  long to figure it out.”

 “But we figured it out,” Hopper smirks, leaning down and placing a chaste kiss on his girlfriend’s lips. 

 “Gross,” Benny whines, which causes everyone to laugh.

 “Alright, Benny, truth or dare?” Joyce asks.  

 .

.

Tossing their bags into the trunk of the car, Hopper leans over and smirks down at Joyce. 

 “What?” she asks when she catches him staring. 

 “Remember last night when you were teasing me about being a typical boy that’s fascinated by cheerleaders because of, I believe your exact words were ‘they wear stupidly short skirts’?”

 “Yeah?” she replies skeptically, “what about it?” 

 “Well, it’s not too late for you to join the squad for next year.”

 Joyce’s eyes nearly pop out of her head and she swats at his arm to scold him for making such a ridiculous statement. 

 “You wish,” she scoffs. 

 “I  do  wish.’

 “Hop!” Joyce exclaims, “stop picturing me in one of those ridiculous little skirts!”

 “I can’t help it. You’re already hotter than the rest of the cheerleaders without the skirt. If you wore the skirt I think time might standstill.”

 “Oh yeah?” she laughs.

 “On second thought, maybe don’t join. When I told you I’d love you until the clock stopped ticking I was hoping that would last longer than the first pep rally of senior year.”

 “I can’t believe we’re going to be seniors,” she muses. 

 “The seniors that everyone wants to be,” he reminds her. “I’m going to go after a football scholarship and you, my genius girlfriend, are going to get into any college you want, I’m certain of it. Then we can get the hell out of this small town.”

 “Me and you?” she asks softly. 

 Hopper closes the trunk of the car, sealing in their bags and smiles over at Joyce, “Me and you." 

 “‘Till the clock stops ticking,” he adds with a cheeky wink before tossing the keys into the driver's seat and beginning their trip back to reality. 

  My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

All's well that ends well to end up with you

[bow-woahh]

Heal Me After Hurting chapter 2 DVD commentary ask?

Send me your favorite scene/chapter from one of my works and I’ll post a DVD commentary on it.

Heal me after hurting! it's been a while since I've revisited this so I'm excited to talk about it! It's crazy to think it was nearly a year ago when I wrote it. It genuinely feels like just yesterday.

Chapter 2 ("Sick of saying nothing back") is the chapter where Catra and Adora actually start to communicate their feelings about each other and past together (hence why it's pretty dialogue heavy).

Catra has obviously just woken up from a nightmare and is still feeling pretty out of it, so it makes sense she'd be a little less closed off as a defense mechanism. Plus after hours of not actually speaking to Adora, she actually really wants to.

"Catra? Hey...hey, babe— don't, don’t cry, what’s wrong?”

I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure Adora says babe at least once every chapter. Maybe just one and two. But yes, that was purposeful.

(“For many, closure is a good tool to put an end to lingering questions and thoughts in one's mind, for others, all it does is remind them of things you needn’t reminders of. Over due time, you’ll figure out whether you want that closure or not, or whether to move on and look towards the future.”)

It's so sad that S5 completely destroyed the Micah as Catra's father figure/advice giver character but hey I still love the idea of this dynamic and I stand by it with him as her therapist in this fic.

Also, closure is a very important theme in this chapter, as neither of them got that: Catra because she literally wasn't allowed to get any and by the time she was it was too late; Adora because although she did break up with Catra, it was over text and was the last thing she wanted to do. Lots of unresolved issues were left behind.

“You—” Catra stops herself, takes a breath, then tries again. "You just...disappeared out of my life, left."

There's an obvious reason as to why Adora left and completely cut her off (because of Catra's mental health and how she wasn't just a danger to herself but others too) but it's so unlike her that Catra wants to believe that there was some other reason, that is wasn't just because—in her eyes—that she wasn't good enough. And actually, she turns out to be kind of right.

“I wasn’t well,” she says, mouth dry and words meek. It comes out like an excuse, even though it’s anything but.

This is at the moment the closest Catra can get to an apology, because she knows what she did was wrong and has grown a lot since then, but it's still so hard to admit that, especially to the person the hurt the most.

"It's just, I just...I dreamt about—"

Adora scoots closer. "Everything that happened that night? Yeah, I, um…I do too sometimes. It must be worse for you though, especially because…” she hesitates, then says, “still– you're not supposed to use your voice, you need to fully recover, okay?"

She cares SO much like ❤️🥺

"I didn't know what to do, or say, what was allowed." Adora replies, still apprehensive.

Adora likes rules, and boundaries. Before, although their relationship was obviously still kind of convoluted, for all it's faults it worked. After the incident, even once Catra was leading a healthier life, Adora had no clue how to approach her, if she could approach her. All the boundaries once there were gone with new ones that were so blurry that there was no point in trying to cross them. It was as if they were strangers, which is something Adora wasn't equipped to deal with.

Adora also says before this: “Everyone said– they said to give you space. So you could recover. So...I listened.”

Because she didn't know what she could do, what the boundaries were, she followed the guidelines set for her by others, which may or may not have been the right thing to do.

“You still care,” Catra whispers, bringing her knees up to her chest, head starting to pound as she begins to regret the bold statement.

Despite everything, despite Adora taking care of her the whole day, it's only now that Catra realises (or let's herself acknowledge) that Adora does still care greatly for her. Adora is obviously amazed at how Catra can even imply otherwise, because Adora never stopped caring and she thought it was pretty obvious.

Closing the lingering distance – the lingering tension – between them, Catra moves to sit opposite Adora.

“Adora... I’m sorry. For everything. I wish that– I wish things were different. That I was different.”

This!! Line!! Okay first — the fact Catra said the same thing in S5...I'm a prophet. But also, this is so important because now, just like in the show, now that Catra's finally admitted to the person she hurt the most that she does feel remorse over her actions, she can move forward now. Obviously, the contexts are a little different but I'd say it mostly applies.

Maybe things were always destined to happen this way.

Listen Catradora are simply star crossed lovers, but only for a little while. I just feel like in every universe it only makes sense of they fall out/grow distant before coming back together. They get their happy ending, but it just takes a little while yknow?

"No, it wasn't right, I should have spoken to you sooner, instead of lurking in the background…" the colour seems to rush to her face at the statement, and Catra can't help but be curious about what she actually means.

I remember when I was outlining literally writing how Adora would like,, low-key stalk Catra to see how she was doing. Nothing like super creepy, maybe just sitting in one of lectures or watching her with Scorpia and Catra at a coffee shop that she just happened to go to as well. Completely coincidental.

Catra wants to say 'me too'. She wants to shout it out at the top of the lungs, because all throughout when she was recovering she thought of Adora, love or hate – or a mix of the two – she thought of her.

Obviously drawing from the show here. Like it was clear they never really stopped thinking about each other and the same can be said here. Catra could never quite get rid of Adora from her mind. Partially because of how much she cared and loved her but also because of the fact she'd had so little closure from Adora.

“I didn’t even have my phone. The old guy was pretty careful with who I talked to in the first month or so. But…” she halts, and can’t help but wrap the arms around herself tighter.

A little extra info that I never put in the fic because it just relevant — Catra has a dad in this, which is who she's referring to here. Also, if you couldn't tell from the few context clues here and there, Catra is also pretty rich too. She wasn't exactly spoilt when she was growing up because, for a while, her dad was married to SW (picture evil step mum) but by the time she was around 16, 17, she's out of the picture, because of an,, unfortunate accident. Shadow Weaver is either present or dead in all the fics I write, okay?

“[...]They all told me to cut all ties with you, so you’d be able to focus on yourself, so I could do the same, and what I had wanted to say wasn’t exactly what everyone else expected.”

[Adora taking about the message she sent to Catra] I imagine before Adora agonised over what to say to Catra for days, much to Glimmer and Bow's dismay that they ended up sitting down and helping her right the message that she actually sent, but she obviously hated it then wrote the message she actually wanted to send in her own, before being unable to send it and going with the other one.

“Catra, I’m here babe, talk to me,” Adora says

She said babe again?!? Damn I went to town lmao

“Don’t...don’t cry,” Adora says, unconvincingly and accompanied with a weak smile in an even weaker whisper of her own. That’s all it takes for the dam to crumble completely and overflow. When those tears finally pour down, her first sob sends shivers down her spine, and it quickly worsens from there.

Ouch...this scene hurts to read. I'm sure when I was writing it I was laughing manically at the pain I was going to inflict on you all but...damn. Like the way Catra is trying so hard to stay strong but as soon as she sees Adora distressed again she just breaks down. God how an I getting hurt by my own fic??

Carefully, cautiously even, she wipes a straggling tear from her cheek, and with her lips just slightly upturned, mismatched eyes piercing through sky blue ones, she whispers, “it’s okay now though? Isn’t it?”

This moment is. Everything. So far, a lot of this has been Adora comforting Catra, Adora literally looking after Catra, but this is finally Catra reciprocating that by comforting Adora back, by letting her know ‘I'm here for you too.’ Also the brief tension that this causes.. wonderful.

Catra can see, smell, is Adora, and her lips are right there, looking soft and alluring like they always have, like they'll be enough to dissipate all worries, cast away all her doubts. But she’s scared, scared for this to happen, because it’s all so soon, too sudden, and moments before they'd been crying, and what if she messes up, what if this gesture messes it up?

I loved finding out how I actually fooled people into thinking they were gonna kiss. I'm sorry. But I'm not. Most people actually said they were glad they didn't, which was very much the response I wanted, so I was pretty happy with it.

“I was kinda worried you'd never come around, or that we'd get close and one of us would shut down once the serious stuff was brought up. If I’m being honest, I nearly didn't come— when Scorpia asked.”

"I don't see why she asked or why you'd want to." Catra shrugs

Yes. Scorpia was 100% being a bit of a shit stirrer. She knew these two fools needed to talk to each other.

Casually, Adora let's out the next statement as if it were fact. “They weren't you.” she answers with a shrug.

At this point Adora has long accepted that there's no one like Catra. That there's no one who can replace her. What she was to her. Obviously she tried, but Catra was still there the whole time in her mine. Catra is just it for her and she knows that. So for her, admitting this is as easy as breathing because she's come to terms with it.

But she can't, she's too far behind, she's still processing, and she hates that, because Adora feels – is – a million miles ahead of her, and she wishes it could be easy, that she could be easy on herself, that she could let Adora hear what she wants, no, needs to hear…though she just isn't there yet.

I feel so bad for Catra here because she feels like she can't keep up with Adora's pace, how well she's handling this, but it's not even her fault, like, it's just harder for her to deal with it like :((

Catra never saw the need for it anyway– Adora already looks stunning without it. Expecting her brain to chide her for even thinking that, Catra is practically amazed when there’s no little voice in her head condemning her for thinking such a thing, for going back there.

Progress,, we like to see! Obviously, in the last chapter we see more of this as well, which is great.

Adora, who broke up with her. Adora, who was once her everything. Adora, the one she had hurt the most, was here; talking to her, accepting her, smiling at her, forgiving her.

Callback to chapter 1,, we love to see it lmao

Anyway I hope you enjoyed this! Sorry it took 59 years but to make up for it, chap 8 of bloom will be up in like 2, 3 days! (:

[edengarden]

Hi! May I have a romantic heaven box BNHA matchup, please? :)

I'm Flo, a 19 years old bisexual girl.

Appearance: I'm 164 cm(~5'3) tall, with slim, kinda athletic body. I have medium long brown hair and same coloured deer-eyes(probably most attractive part on me), I also wear eyesglasses. I have thin mouth unfortunately. Also, I have a tiny little scar above my right eyebrow(I opened our car's door on my head years ago lolol), it's barely visible. I'm vain and always dress like a lady: so dresses and skirts, I have a classy, elegant or cute style, depends on my daily outfit. I wear light makeup, but not all the time.

Personality: Ambiverted, Virgo with Leo ascendant and Pisces moon. Slytherpuff. Needless to say, these already represent how confusingly dual my personality is. My behaviour constatntly changes, depending on who I am with: I try to sell myself, being two-faced, wearing a mask(sometimes I appear to be talkative, other times full-stoic), but to people I really do love, I'm quite blunt. Most of the time I'm caring and relatively kind person(but can be an asshole&harsh if tired emotionally). Highly critical, opinionated and rational-thinker, and I usually analyze everything: movies, books, other people, myself. HATE small talk, I always want to talk about some deep shit, sharing my opinions, thougts(only if you ask for it). Enjoy debating. Also, I'm the REALLY clumsy, like clumsy af and I have an invincible talent in getting myself into the most embarrassing, cringe situations. Hate appearing to be weak or crying in front of others(I never do), and generally I can get melancolic and depressed easily. I don't really trust even my loved ones, I always hide my deepest emotional(or whatever) issues, I just can't stand the fact being emotionally vulnerable. Also, I bottle up feelings well. But I can be soft sometimes which suprises people. One of my best friends said, I am suprising, always doing something unpredicted. Additionally, I stress over something all the time. About my humour, it's kinda ironic, dark, morbid, troll-ish; roasting, teasing people 24/7. Don't worry, despite my sometimes serious act, I can be a total dumb idiot. Selfish, vain, lazy,  snobbish hahah. Quite liberal, and I almost never judge people, I mind my own buisness. When I can talk about something I love or just sharing my opinion, I am passionate and be ready for a LONG rambling. Oh, I love alcohol and going out with friends, also I smoke those occassions. Plus, I have god-like hands, everyone told me that I could earn money bc of my massaging skills(I just know by instict how to touch people lol). Oh, and I daydream and zone out a lot. I love going out and drink alcohol with my friends(and sometimes somoke too), the drunken me can be a real asshole, but also hugs out of the blue, I get softer. Oh, and I curse fucking much, I have a disgustingly flithy mouth, bc of my rather innocent appearance and behavior ppl are suprised how much is... cruse.

Relationship: I don't really have a 'type' but I get bored easily: I takes a lot for me to really like in long-term a person, so I fall easier for complex and charismatic ones(but like I said, I can fall for other personalities too!!). I'm a quite difficult person to be with and to love, so I'm suprisingly flexible in a relationship. Only thing I need and without it wouldn't work at all: DEEP CONVOS AND SOME INTELLECT. Also, I have a quite roasting-bullying type humour, so my lover should understand and being able to handle that. Anyways, I'm not much of a PDA person(but I don't mid handholding, short hugs etc. if my partner really want to), and not romantic at all(also cannot flirt hehe), and for a long time I can be bit distant. Love language is words of affirmation&quality time, and if I have to express my feelings I'm best with acts of service. I love cuddling, ppl are suprised when I initiate hugs but tbh I love physical affection. I'm probably more likely the 'friend' lover. I need a lot, lot, lot alone time.

Hobbies/Likes: classical literature, theatre, politics, hiking, sightseeing, mysteries, reading about disappearances(crimes), trying out new things, yoga, running, horse riding, table tennis, listening to music, cats, thunderstorms, rainy days, cider, tequila

Music taste: Oh man, MIXED. I listen to literally everything except techno, it depends on my mood honestly. But if I had to say something, I think indie, alternative rock, electronic and psychedelic songs are the closest to me, but I've grown to listen more and more rap. Most of the songs are depressive as fuck, I mean I can be at my happiest, but I'd still listen some dark shit. But still, I enjoy pop(2000s pop at parties FUCK YEAH), jazz. Also, some occassions all my ears and mind need is some good ol' classical music. Some faves: Tame Impala, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Jack Stauber, Fink and some Hungarian bands that no one knows unfortunately. :(

Sorry if I was too long and more sorry if I've already requested before(my brain just rots lol), then just ignore me, hehe~♡

Did you,,, did you just copy paste like 3/4 of who I am

Man when I was reading your persona I was going “RinRinRinRinRinRin-“ but I decided against it UwU

ALL IN ALL you honestly sound like my type of person?? Like deadass I’d wanna befriend you. Fuck them small talks tell me what you think of the expansion of the universe and let’s talk about what if drugs are illegal bc they make us perceive true reality-

I’m going to match you up with... Shindo!

This one is a Battle of Wits, I swear. You didn’t trust him a single bit when the two of you first met, no one even thought you’d ever become friends. Shindo could practically see the gears turning in your head and quite frankly he was impressed?? You’re a highly intelligent individual who was able to keep your guard up and seclude yourself from others while not appearing TOO unapproachable? Boy was whipped and he didn’t even realize it. While others thought you were sort of cold and pragmatic, he thought you were the most well-balanced human in the world.

You guys 100% had an enemies to lovers thing going on, but it was slightly different. YOU started off completely uninterested in him, but while he made you think the feeling was mutual, I think Shindo found himself gravitating towards you. You can bet he secretly celebrated every little victory and step forward he made with you. Boy did NOT let up.

I seriously think he’s entertaining enough for you to keep interest in him. Shindo is as two-faced as you are (if not more), and he WILL change his behaviour within a second to keep your interest (somehow no one noticed his habit of doing that when he was crushing on you?? SUSPICIOUS). Also not a big fan of small talk; if he’s interested in you, he wants to know how you tick. He wants to know what you enjoy, what you like and what you dislike. And when you tell him while trying to still keep an emotional distance from him, he takes it as a challenge. No, he doesn’t think your relationship is a game, but he does think it’s highly entertaining and interesting.

When you start softening up to him, he won’t even grow bored. He’s worked so hard to get close to you and it finally pays off and he’s so happy??

But he won’t ever initiate PDA, just because he too has an image to uphold lmao if others don’t personally know you they’d never know y’all are falling for each other.

Songs!!

- One of My Turns, Pink Floyd (“don’t look so frightened this is just a passing phase one of my bad days” just hits different for the two of you?? I’m not saying your relationship is toxic bc it really isn’t but the VIBE is there)

- Do I Wanna Know?, Arctic Monkeys

- Dollar Days, David Bowie

- You Give Love A Bad Name, Bon Jovi

[yastaghr]

Broken Things Shine Brighter 19

So here’s the next chapter of BTSB. So much research went into this one. Why do men not name the different styles of collars and necklines on their shirts? Frustrated costume designer wants to know.

Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13431909/chapters/56859664

Blue definitely wasn’t expecting to wake up like this. Yeah, he and Razz had been sharing a room, but they weren’t to the point of sharing a bed yet. Razz was still nervous about being touched, and both of them had night terrors after everything they’d been through. Maybe it was one of those that had inspired this. It didn’t really matter why. All that mattered to Blue was how the heck he was going to get out from underneath the sprawled body of his soulmate. It wasn’t anywhere near comfortable, not with his chest still so raw. But Blue knew the rules. If someone falls asleep on top of you, whether they’re a friend, a lover, a family member, or a pet, then you can’t wake them up just because you wanted to move. So Blue was trapped here, under Razz, until he woke up.

Some unknown amount of time passed. It could have been minutes. It could have been hours. Blue had no idea. Eventually, though, Razz yawned, stretched, and sat up. Unfortunately, he was still sitting on Blue, so no freedom yet.

Razz smacked his lips and looked around. He must have sensed something wrong. It was probably just that he was waking up somewhere other than where he had fallen asleep. Whatever it was, he stiffened. Blue, quick to reassure him, said, “hey, razz. what’s up? besides you, that is?”

His soulmate looked down and blinked at him. Then a hand smacked his forehead and he groaned. “PLEASE, NO WORDPLAY BEFORE BREAKFAST. I’M SIMPLY NOT PREPARED FOR IT.”

Blue couldn’t help the cheeky grin that spread like warm butter across his face. “what, the magnificent and terrible razz isn’t ready to handle a measly little pun first thing in the morning? i’m shocked. i thought you said yesterday that you were always vigilant against crimes against the sanctity of the spoken word. always would imply first thing in the morning, too. or is there some special definition of ‘always’ here that i’m not jibing with?”

Purple stars were eclipsed by narrowing eye sockets. “THIS IS EXACTLY WHY I INSTITUTED THIS RULE. I AM EVER VIGILANT ABOUT THIS. I’M JUST NOT CAPABLE OF A DECENT REPLY UNTIL AFTER I’VE EATEN. ALSO, PLEASE NEVER UTTER THE WORD ‘JIBING’ AGAIN UNLESS WE ARE ON A SAILING VESSEL. IT MAKES MY SOUL SHUDDER.”

Blue’s smile spread even wider. “sure thing, razz. i’ll just make a note of that in my ever increasing lexicon of word uses i don’t know. what does j… that action have to do with a sailboat?”

Razz grinned back, pride and smugness radiating down their bond. He seemed to love it when he knew something that Blue didn’t, so Blue now took every opportunity to let him show off. “TO JIBE, OR TO GYBE AS IT IS ALSO SPELLED, MEANS TO CHANGE YOUR SAIL ANGLE AND HEADING WITH THE WIND DOWNWIND. DO YOU WANT ME TO DRAW YOU A DIAGRAM?”

“yeah, why don’t you do that,” Blue said, always eager for new knowledge. “but first can you get off my chest? it kinda hurts to have you on top of the bandages.”

Razz clamored off of him, blushing. “OF COURSE! LET ME GO GET A NOTEBOOK WHILE YOU GET DRESSED. ACTUALLY, DON’T. MUFFET MENTIONED THAT YOU NEEDED SOME NEW CLOTHES. YOU ARRIVED… NEARLY TWO WEEKS AGO? WOWIE, IT CERTAINLY FEELS LIKE LONGER THAN THAT. EITHER WAY, WE SHOULD GET YOU SOMETHING NICER THAN THOSE RAGS YOU’RE WEARING.”

Blue looked down at his clothes. “i thought they looked pretty nice…” Then he took in the holes, stains, and fraying hems. “at least, they used to. stars, when was the last time i had new clothes? it feels like forever ago.”

“IT PROBABLY WAS,” Razz said tactlessly. “IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BEFORE YOU CAME HERE, AND ALMOST CERTAINLY BEFORE THAT HUMAN OF YOURS FELL DOWN.”

He winced. “true. well, come on, then. let’s at least get some breakfast before she subjects me to her measuring tape. and you can draw me that diagram. i really do want to know about this ‘gybing’ business.”

Razz grinned. “DEAL.”

=====

The third human made it significantly farther than the last two had. Slim was sure that he would need to recheck his cameras. Something must have gone wrong with them for him not to be alerted until the human reached the long bridge. Then again, that was why he had so many of them. No matter how many failed, there would always be another one to catch the human in the act of moving through the Underground.

Slim shortcutted in behind the human. The first thing he noticed was his hair. It was a bright orange. Then he noticed how pale his skin was. Neither of those things meant much to him other than the fact that he had never seen them before. He was sure they would mean something to another human, though, just like the colour of another monster’s soul told him something about them. He wondered whether humans knew about soul traits. Surely they had to notice that people didn’t all behave the same? Maybe that just didn’t matter as much to them as it did to a monster. To him, the colour of a monster’s soul was a huge indicator of how he needed to act around them. Then again, he didn’t go around dragging out people’s souls just to see what colour they were. It used to be because he didn’t care. Now it was because it was rude.

He wasn’t sure what alerted the human to his presence, but something did. He spun around to face Slim. That was when Slim noticed the freckles. There were so many freckles. So many.

“Monster! What’s your name?” The human shouted.

“slim,” he answered simply.

The human grinned. “I’m Sean, and I’m on a quest! Are you prepared to help me with it?”

Slim shrugged. “depends on the quest. i’m kind of on one of my own, and if there’s a conflict of interest i’m going to go with mine. sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry!” Sean insisted. “That’s just the nature of a quest! Now, my quest is to find the voice behind the door. I have a message for the monster that chats with my friend, who I promised I wouldn’t name! I’m prepared to fight any number of monsters in order to complete my quest! Can you help me, or do I need to fight you, too?”

“heh, kid, you don’t want to fight me. i’m pretty sure that i’m the monster you’re looking for. i’ve been telling knock knock jokes with a voice on the other side of the big door for years,” Slim said with a grin.

Sean narrowed his eyes. “Why? You have to tell me because the other monster told me what you’re supposed to say.”

Suspicion. Slim admired that in a monster. He wished he didn’t have to admire it in a human. “i do it so i can perfect my most annoying jokes to use on my brother. he hates puns, deeply, and i love getting to see his face when i deliver a whopper. you could say it’s a san… actually, never mind the pun. it’s funny.”

Sean smiled and shot him a thumbs up. “You got it right! Okay, here’s your message: I heard about the revolution. Next time you have time, come tell me about it, please.”

Slim froze. How… how had he heard about that? As far as Slim knew, he was the only person this guy behind the door ever talked to. Why did he care? He lived behind the door. What did the world on this side of it matter to him? “th-thanks, bud. now, uh… do you know what’s coming next?”

Sean nodded. “I’m going to get to see my dad again. It’s okay, Slim. I knew what was going to happen when I left the man behind the door. He’s got a bunch of us living there, but he only sends through the ones who are ready to die. My dad… my dad was killed by a mountain lion. He was trying to save me from dying. I wanted to fight it, but… I fell down a hole and ended up here. I want to be with my dad again. I’m not afraid to die. Besides, helping an imprisoned species to escape to freedom is badass!”

“heh, you’re not wrong there, kid. are you sure you’re ready to die?” Slim needed to hear it confirmed one last time.

“Yep!” Sean said, sitting down on the edge of the bridge. “Just try to make it fast. I don’t really want to bleed to death. That’s… how my dad died. It looked like it really hurt. Not that I’m afraid of pain! I just don’t want it to be the last thing I feel.”

Slim summoned his weapon. It’s citrine fire rose like smoke from the glaive’s blade. “i can help you with that. now, do you have any last words?”

The human considered. “Death to all tyrants?”

Slim chuckled. “you can’t get more badass than that. okay. close your eyes.” The human did, and Slim swung his blade. Just like he had promised, there was no pain. An orange soul floated into the air, and Slim captured it in the vacuum tube. “heh. three down, four to go.”

=====

Blue stared at the latest sketch Muffet had produced for him. “no. i’m not wearing that.”

“Oh, please, Blue! This design is all the rage amongst the upper crust! They love these bouffant sleeves at the moment, and the asymmetrical hemline would be absolutely darling on you!” Muffet wheedled.

“i’m not wearing a dress, muffet, no matter how good you think it would look on me! i’m not a girl, and i really don’t like it when people think i am!” Blue shouted back.

“So you have worn one, then,” Muffet said smugly. He hated that smug expression. This wasn’t some kind of gotcha game where the winner was the one who got the most information out of the other. This was way more serious than that! This was a matter of what he was going to wear, and he took what he wore very seriously! … Okay, no, that was a lie. He liked to put as little energy into his appearance as possible. And yeah, he got that right now that reflected badly on her, but that didn’t mean he could be convinced to wear a dress!

“yes, muffet, i’ve worn a dress before. i was a curious kid. i wanted to know what one felt like. i didn’t like it. everyone acted like i was a different person that had to obey different rules and i hated it. so, no dress, and that’s final.” He meant it, too. He wasn’t going to budge on this one.

“I suppose that’s fair,” Muffet said with a sigh, “Not everyone is up to bending the laws of gender expression. That’s a shame. Well, then, how about this?” Muffet held up her latest sketch. Blue studied it.

He could see that the top would be roomy on him, which was something they had negotiated earlier. He hated tight clothing. The sleeves were three quarter length and would fall just beyond his elbows. The sleeve was a notched turnback hem, although he probably wouldn’t turn it back. The hem of the shirt was the same length all the way around, which he liked. The neck was a shallow v neck, the kind that was used on sweaters and had reinforced stitching. The pants only had the words “classic blue jeans” written on them. He could dig that. There was only one thing about this set up that he didn’t like.

“i need a hood, muffet. it’s a thing for me, hoods. they’re safe.”

Muffet eyed him thoughtfully. “I think I can accommodate that. A hood would definitely change the lines, but I think it would work better on you. Here,” She grabbed the sketch, erased the neckline, and sketched in a simple hood. “Does this look better?”

Blue slowly nodded. “looks good to me. what kind of material were you thinking about using?”

“Dearie, were you really thinking I was only going to make you one copy? You need at least three changes of clothes, and I also want to make you a set of formal wear and pajamas. I’ll sketch those up in a minute. For now why don’t you go pick out the fabrics that appeal to you the most? Go for at least three. You know what textures work best for you.”

Blue nodded amiably. He ambled over to the cabinet and started going through the choices. Eventually he settled on a plain steely blue, medium-weight, soft knit fabric, a soft, navy blue swirled, lightweight cotton, and a thicker flannel with a pretty blue, black, and purple check pattern. Those seemed like good options to him. They would cover the range of temperatures that could be found in the Underground, and the textures and colours all appealed to him. He brought the bolts back for Muffet to inspect.

She nodded absently. “Those look nice, dearie. How do these designs work?”

The first design was obviously the formal one. It was a three piece suit over a button up and tie. He reluctantly resigned himself to an outfit without a hood. They just weren’t what you wore in a formal setting. The second outfit was a short-sleeved caftan with a reinforced neckline and simple geometric embroidery sketched out. It looked comfy, and, with only one piece, was definitely lazy enough for him. For a moment he considered protesting something so close to a dress, but decided against it. Besides, the design was very obviously masculine, and he wouldn’t be wearing it around anyone who didn’t know him well.

“they work for me, muff. do you want me to pick fabrics for them, too?” He asked.

It was Muffet’s turn to nod. “Go ahead, I’ll get started on the full patterns.”

Blue set out and found another set of fabrics for the clothes. The suit itself would be in a slick grey. The button up would be white, and the tie would be a bright blue to match his magic. The caftan fabric he picked was a nice linen done up in a light purple and blue tye-dye. He picked the softest fabric he could that would still work for the design, and the tye-dye appealed to his inner kid.

When he showed the fabrics to Muffet she nodded approvingly. “Those work nicely. Now, why don’t you pick a fabric and start cutting?”

He saluted jovially. “yes ma’am. right away ma’am.”

Muffet’s eight eyes were twinkling when she said back to him, “Good work, soldier. I expect you to do as good a job as you did on the former Queen’s dress.”

“you got it!” With that, Blue grabbed a bolt of fabric and got to work.

[daraanna]

“Arranged Love”- Part Three „Golden chrysanthemums”

So at the beginning I want to say I have no idea about fencing, sooo... some things can have no sense. Still I hope you will enjoy it.

................................................................................................................

To his surprise, his life after marriage did not change much. He could do whatever he wanted, and his wife hardly bothered him. At first, he liked it. He spent all his free time with friends or watching the dances of beautiful dancers. However, after two months, the lack of interest from the black-haired girl began to bothering him. It wasn't normal ... Every woman he knew was charmed by him, or at least interested. At first he understood it, after all he was a stranger to her. However, now the indifference his wife give to him began to irritate him. This feeling also caused that he lose interest in other women. Basically, they were no longer a challenge or entertainment for him.

"Maybe try to do something for her?" One day Mitsuki suggested "when I have fight with Chõ-Chõ I arranging a great feast in our chambers as apology and then we take chocolate and ...”

“Mitsuki, really none of us want to hear that. It is disgusting and do not convince me that such are the charms of love in books they do not describe such things“ Inojin interrupted him.

"But the idea is not so bad ... You should do something that pleases her," Shikadai said.

"She doesn't like anything" blue-eyed sighed looking at the chessboard, "And this game is still boring ...

"Because you can't win," Nara said, checking his king.

“Maybe some gift? Jewellery or other fringe girls like these things.”

In this way, the idea of buying her fabrics and threads arose. This did not bring any result. Not only his wife still didn’t speak to him ... Expensive fabrics were wasted, because what she did with them did not resemble embroidery... More his sister's doodles. Really, black-haired girl hated him so much?  "Maybe she has a lover?" Shikada finally said. "That would explain her disappearance ..."

At first he laughed at the idea. However, the longer he thought about it, the more angry he was. He felt bad that only he cares ... Not to mention the fact that her behavior offended not only him, but the entire royal family.

 Not long after, one morning, the creak of the floor woke him up. When he opened his eyes he saw his wife standing in front of the wardrobe and preparing her kimono. He looked at her for a moment.

“Sarada ...” he was able to see her body stiffen at the sound of his voice.

"Yes?" She replied turning towards him.

"Come here," he looked at her approaching figure, he didn't know what he wanted from her. The girl stopped next to their bed and looked at him surprised . From this distance he could clearly see her face, her long eyelashes, black onyx eyes and pale skin. Her hair was loose and in slightly mess was falling on her shoulders. She was only dressed in a thin, translucent Hadajuban. The fabric created to be worn under a kimono allowed him to see every curvature of her figure. Against his will, his eyes stopped on her not too big but full breasts to escape to her wide hips and long legs. He swallowed involuntarily. His wife was really beautiful. Shikadai's words popped again in his head. He felt a strong squeeze in his stomach at the thought of another man who might have had her. On impulse, he grabbed her wrist, pulling her close to him, catching her lips in a kiss. The girl did not resist, she did not react at all when he embraced her waist pulling her body to his. She smelled of lavender, forest and a bit like incense, her lips were soft and her body warm and at that moment it was hard for him to remember the last time he wanted someone else's touch so badly... However, when his gaze crossed with hers he felt his heart freeze.  She was even more frightened than on their wedding day. He pulled away from her feeling guilty. He quickly got up and headed for the bathroom. When he returned, his wife was sitting exactly where he left her. He felt even worse, but did not know how to fix it.

"You can go ... you're free," he said after a moment of silence. After his words, the girl covered herself with a blanket and fled to the bathroom from which he had just left.

....................................

After this incident, his wife avoided him even more. If at all possible. He spent the next weeks with friends avoiding women as much as he could. He felt overwhelmed by all this, and flirting made him feel even worse. Of course his servants were not delighted. That day he walked alone in the gardens when he heard laughter. Normally he would ignore it, but at this point it caught his attention for some reason. Looking out from behind the tree, he saw Sarada walking with a pink-haired woman. He was shocked when he noticed that his wife was smiling. The girl was relaxed and really happy. She looked even more beautiful. However, he felt as if someone had kicked him in the stomach. She was never like that with him. It was at this moment that their eyes crossed and her face changed immediately.  The woman with her, however, gave him a friendly wave, embarrassing him. Although she looked familiar, he had no idea who she was.

"Good morning, Boruto-chan," the pink-haired woman greeted him, shocking him even more, because no one with right mind would addressed the heir to the throne like that. “Oh, how you grew up, I mean I saw you at the wedding, but they dressed up both of you so much that I barely recognized my own daughter.

It took him a bit to add two to two, but finally he realized that he was talking to the wife of ex-Shogun and the best healer in the Fire country Sakura Uchich, and which means the mother of his partner.

“O-Oh good morning ... “he replied the only thing that came to his mind.

The appearance of the woman was different from what he remembered, her hair, though still pink, lost its shine and intensity of colour. Her skin became unhealthy, pale, almost cyanic. The whole posture of the healer, who once aroused him in fear (especially when he pissed her off) was more frail. It was obvious that she had lost a lot of weight, in some places the shape of her bones was clearly visible. While standing, she had to be supported by her daughter. Something was clearly wrong.

“Uh, but you should have some time for each other I so often take Sarada from you” sighed green-eyed stroking the head of mentioned girl” I will go back to myself and you two should talk ...”

Black-haired girl was about to protest, but her mother interrupted.

"I am able to walk alone yet" she sighed and slowly goes back toward the palace.

Younger Uchiha was clearly worried.

“Um ... Uh”blond broke the silence, but did not know what to say” What is wrong with your mother?

He immediately felt the chilling look of brunette.

"She is sick," she replied briefly.

"Then she shouldn't rest until she gets better?" He asked, trying to continue the conversation.

"It's not this type of disease you can't get out of ..." she replied much quieter.

“I mean the curse !?”

“Tch. Some say so.”

“ And you don't think so?”

“I think it is more complicated... And, I doubt anyone would have reason to wish her death.”

Once again, the girl's hands began to tremble. And despite the fact that it was once again in his presence, he knew this time that he was not the reason. He remembered the days when his mother was unconscious after the birth of Himawari. The court doctor said that he might not survive this. He thought he understood what the girl was feeling, even though his fear lasted not a whole week.

“I'm sorry...”

"It's not your fault," she replied.

Despite her words, he felt even worse. It all explained her behaviour since she arrived at the palace. She didn't have a lover, she just took care of her sick mother.

“Uh ... I ... As for what happened ... I don't know why I... I mean it won't happen again. I'm sorry” he stammered.

The girl shuddered and looked at the ground.

"Nothing happened ... The duty of the wife is ..." she started, but the blond interrupted her. “I don't want it to look like this ... I know that this marriage doesn't suit any of us, but... I don't want you to act like my slave ... I know I'm a bad husband, but maybe we would try differently. I mean ...” he knows that he was babbling, but he had no better idea to solve this problem. What is worse, the black-haired woman didn’t answer him, just stood and watched.”Maybe we could try to be friends?”

Again, embarrassing silence and her gaze. As if those onyx eyes were able to look into his soul. "We were friends ... As a child," she said uncertainly. This time he looked at her, her expression changed, and her eyes showed curiosity. However, it was obvious that she still didn't trust him.

"I think so, I don't remember much of that time," he sighed, scratching his head.

“Me too. Although it was probably easier then ... To make friends ...”

"Then I thought you were a boy," he said before he had time to think about it. As soon as he realized what he said, he felt embarrassed. Sarada, however, was too shocked to say anything.

"N-nani?" She finally asked.

"I have to go!" He replied, making a tactical retreat.

.......................................................... Despite the embarrassing end of the conversation, his relationship with Sarada warmed. It might not have been a big change, but they talk sometimes, have meal together, and he was convinced that he saw her smiling at least twice in his presence. However, it made him feel so good that it was noticed even by his friends. Who did not fail to tease him without mercy. Now when Mitsuki returned to Oto and Shikadai and Inojin were on training, he spent most of his time alone practicing sword fighting. Once again, he repeated the figures, he had recently been taught by Uncle Kakashi, but unfortunately he stepped on his own legs and landed on a ground, miraculously without hurting himself with a katana. If pain after this fall were not enough, when he was gathering from the ground he heard laughter. Definitely feminine and familiar. He looked around and saw his wife standing not more than 3 meters from him. The girl covered her mouth with her hand to stop the giggle. He couldn't tell if he was more embarrassed or surprised.

"Do you think it is easy?!" He grunted, dusting himself off.

Sarada stopped laughing and stood in silence. She looked at him clearly thinking about something.

"What?" He finally asked in confusion.

“You do it wrong ...”

“Nani?”

"Your posture and the way you hold the katana are not correct," she replied calmly. At what he laughed.

"Are you saying that you know better how to fight than four sensei who taught me how to use the sword?" He came closer, looking at her rashly.

“I do not deny that your movements look beautiful, but they are not very effective.”

"One of my masters was Kakashi Hatake, I'm really supposed to listen to a 14-year-old princess from a small health resort village?" He couldn't resist irritating her when she saw her face. She was clearly annoyed by his behaviour, which she had never expressed so openly before.

"Should I prove it to you?" She growled, coming closer and never losing eye contact with him. There was a determination in her, which in combination with the pink-purple kimono she wore looked cute.

“Okay if you want it so badly.”

He watched with a mocking smile as the girl stripped off a layer of her outfit, showing a simple white shirt and light pink hakama. Typical Naka attire would probably be considered inappropriate for a woman by many. Pulling out the ribbon that was part of her obi, she tie her hair. She looked around and picked up a long stick.

The blond man rolled his eyes. 'Of course,' he thought, remembering their childhood times.

Black-haired girl adopted a fighting pose, waiting for him to prepare for the fight. Boruto smiled as he pulled out his katana. They looked at each other for a moment. Finally, the heir to the throne decided to attack. Sarada dodged and struck the flat part of his sword with a force that Uzumaki did not expect at all. His weapon slipped from his hand, hitting the ground two meters away. Moments later, he felt the tip of a stick touch the skin on his neck. Shocked, he raised his hands, giving up. His wife smirked as she took off the stick.

"I told you," she said, dressing her coat back and tying her belt.

The boy was still looking at her with wide eyes.

"How?" He finally said.

"When you fight, you should use the strength of your whole body, not just your hands," she explained more calmly. "You lack balance and you should work more with core muscles ...

The heir to the throne sighed because he had heard it before.

"How do you know that?" He asked.

Black-haired girl turned away from him, focusing her gaze on the nearby flower bed.

"I had seen my father train," she said. Blue-eyed knew that the knowledge she had could not be gained by mere observation, but he did not know how to draw a conversation. Especially since the subject of the deceased Shogun was still delicate.

"Chrysanthemums are blooming," she said, changing the subject. "Autumn is coming..."

He came up to her and looked at the golden flowers.

"It's getting colder," he said, looking at her. The girl looked thoughtful. She clenched her hands on a basket of herbs. It was now that he noticed that she had it with her.

"I have to go," she said sadly, "I can come back later today ...

Boruto nodded as a sign that he understood.

"See you later," he replied, watching as he headed towards the palace.

.................................................. ......

It was not more than two weeks, as once upon awakening, to his surprise he saw his wife's back. Normally Sarada got up much earlier than he did. For a moment he wondered whether to touch her hair, which, without any hairpin, spilled over their bedclothes, covering her entire pillow and also started attacking his .However, he thought that he should not risk waking her up. If she slept that long it means she must have been tired. Getting up as quiet as possible, he went to the wardrobe, and then to the audience with his father. He noticed at the door that something was wrong. His mother also was in the chamber, holding Himawari on her lap. Everyone was wearing a black, mourning outfit. His parents looked depressed, only his sister, probably not understanding what was happening, was playing with her fox. Concerned, he entered the room and bowed. Moments later he was in the arms of Hinata.

"How is Sarada doing?" She asked him.

He felt panic rising in him, but even though the matter seemed obvious, his brain couldn't connect all the dots.

“What happened?”

"Sakura," his dad replied, placing a hand on his shoulder, "I mean Sarada's mother died tonight."

For a moment he was shocked, and then he immediately run out of the room back to the bedroom. He found black-haired girl exactly in the same position she was when he left the room, but she was awake. She lay on her side blankly looking at the opposite wall. He slowly approached her and crouched beside him.

“Sarada ...” he started but the girl wasn’t reacting “I'm sorry ...”

She looked at him for a moment, with gaze filled with pain, and then turned away from him. Again, looking at her back, he felt even worse.

"I know you feel bad, but ... This is not the end of the world ..." he replied, grasping the opposite of what was intended.

“You know how I feel? “ Her voice was silent but firm “ You don’t know a shit about me ... You have no idea what I'm going through!”

She continued, and with each word she spoke louder and louder.

"I lost the only family I had, I lost my home, I don't have anyone to live for, so it could be the end!"

Moments later he heard her sob. He didn't know what to do. To calm her down, he sat down next to her and put his hand on her shoulder, but the girl quickly turned his palm away, turning back to face him.

“What now !?”

He looked at her. Tears rolled down her cheeks, her face and eyes were swollen from crying, she also had bags under her eyes, most likely caused by not sleeping at night. Her hair was in total disarray, and her body was shaking under the influence of emotions tormenting her. She looked completely different than the quiet and composed, almost looking like a porcelain sculpture  woman he saw on their wedding day. He felt strange, because just as terrifying this view was it was also extremely beautiful and painful. Then he realized that he couldn't do anything to take this suffering from her. He, the heir to the throne, the person who has everything, was completely powerless.

"You are not alone," he said much quieter. "You still have your people in Naka ... My parents care for you, and Himawari ... She adores you and loves you like an older sister ..."

He took her hand uncertainly and gently and, to his surprise, did not pull her away.

“You also have me ... I know I'm not a ideal husband  ... Actually, I have no idea how to build a real relationship. As a friend I am any better at this moment, but ... I promise I will not leave you. If you only let me be by your side, you won't be alone ... “

He had the impression that what he said didn't make any sense and that he probably made everything even worse when he felt a certain weight on his chest. Sarada leaned forward, laying her head against his shoulder. He instinctively embraced her in the waist, pulling her close to him. Her body became limp, occasionally she trembled. It took a while before she was so exhausted that she fell asleep. Boruto was sitting still, only gently stroking her back. It was hard to determine what he felt. He had vague childhood memories of Aunt Sakura, no doubt he was sorry about her death. He was worried about Sarada, he could not imagine what she could feel now. If he lost his parents ... All he knew was that he was confused.

………………………………………………………………………………

Soooooooo…  there is another part... Finally! Although I am not exacly satisfied with the last part. And I know... I killed Sasuke and Sakura. I feel terrible too, but they will appear in flashbacks ( you know It is Naruto fanfic after all), and they are happy together now trust me...

One more thing about the title  chrysanthemums are the flowers which are very popular to use to make cemetery bouquets in my country. They are so popular at cemeteries that traditionally it is consider to be bad luck If you give someone alive  chrysanthemums  bouquet.

  <<first part                                                                            next part>

[greensconnor]

i’m asking about your dragon age characters

molly i would KILL for u im ur personal hitman now

anyway i said my city now because the entire bioware writing team sucks shit xoxo and i’m so much smarter than all of them but also fully incapable of having a normal amount of ocs for anything (see: the time i made 20 rwby ocs in less than two weeks) so i have. five worldstates here r some assorted thoughts

uhhh so the worldstates r as follows

eira mahariel (two-handed berserk/champ spec), rhett hawke (two-handed berserk spec), alas lavellan (mage knight enchanter spec), romanced alistair/fenris/dorian respectively

shiv tabris (dual wield duelist/assassin spec), radella “rads” hawke (mage spirit healer spec), kat adaar (two-handed reaver spec), romanced morrigan/isabela/cassandra respectively because im a pc gamer and i think i should be able to date whatever video game woman i like because im infinitely better than cishet men

this world state said yeah i respect mens rights. mens rights to shut the fuck up

twins bronson (sword/shield reaver spec) & bryant cousland (archer ranger spec), carmine hawke (archer assassin spec), syracuse trevelyan (dual wield tempest spec), romanced zevran/anora/josephine/bull. if ur wondering how that works my city now and the warden, hawke and the inquisitor should all meet and so they do because i Said So

riva amell (mage arcane warrior/battlemage spec), graham “gray” hawke (mage force spec), hellathen “hela” lavellan (archer assassin spec); romanced cullen/anders and later blackwall because hawke only likes men who will break his heart. hela doesn’t have a romance because she’s literally 20. who let her lead the inquisition (me it was me). also it should be noted the version of cullen i have in my head only vaguely resembles actual cullen because i write better than dragon age writers ever could and i gave him an Actual Cohesive Narrative and he gets bullied relentlessly for being scrawnier than his mage boyfriend

malien “mal” surana (mage spirit healer/keeper spec), jules hawke (sword/shield reaver spec), ash adaar (mage rift spec), romanced leliana/merrill/krem because i should have been able to kiss krem and its a Crime that i am not allowed to

knight enchanter is a Very op specialization and by Very op i mean it makes a mage with their built-in low constitution stats able to solo the biggest baddest dragon in the game on nightmare mode in under five minutes so like. alas lavellan fist fights dragons for fun send tweet

i think lavellans should be able to hit ppl with bricks for all the shit they endure. thus solas gets pranked by mahariel and alas by which i mean they just tip buckets of water onto him from the rookery

kat might be my only competent inquisitor but she did also try to knock out the right hand of the divine and attempt to gap even tho there’s fucky magic burning up her hand so does she have a brain cell? you decide

also its fantasy land and i do what i want so kat has blue/gold sectoral heterochromia

gray “mage rights” hawke is best friends with fenris which surprises literally everyone. their friendship started because they got into a fist fight and then they were like okay i respect u now. hawke is like hey fenris give me ur sword i have a fun trick to show u [uses his sword as a foci to zap carver in the ass with lightning]

i am Always thinking abt like how cullen could have been one man anti-chantry propaganda machine if he hadn’t so blatantly been shoehorned into every game past origins so anyway bioware forgot about a wholeass moon i can write what i like. [holds up cullen by the scruff of his stupid armor] not only are you bisexual you are also a bottom

i also Hate the whole uwu mage haters get fixed by romancing a mage

unlocked secret dialogue option where my inquisitors verbally cuss out dorian’s dad instead of whatever sympathetic narrative the writers were going for cuz its bullshit.

riva is a showoff and a Menace about being as good as he is because he unabashedly loves being a mage and hes like oooh look at me im sexy i dont need to use my hands to cast magic because i’m just that good ;)) and you know what. hes right.

gray, on the other hand, does Not want to be mage. he wants to be a druffalo farmer and retire in the hinterlands and be left the fuck alone. unfortunately he is gay and has one brain cell and terrible, terrible taste in men. ribbed relentlessly for this by riva (altho does he have room to talk hes been hung up on cullen since he was like 13)

shiv is trans n kieran is the result of doing the dark ritual with her wife and he looks a Lot like shiv (dark skin pointed ears, shock-white hair) and morrigan always just Assumed she dyed it or did something magic with it so seeing their kid come out like that was a WEIRD time for her

leliana almost Murdered by cassandra in worldstate 5 because the warden is Actually There The Whole Time, but its been 10 years, mal’s cut off all her hair and gotten full facial tattoos and she’s like “no one will know its me its fine” and she’s right. she gets away with it. only cullen like, Knows, because he knew her before the blight but he doesnt have a death wish n he like. will Not piss her off

shes dalish by birth n she was stolen from her clan by templars and thus is vehemently anti-circle and anti-chantry in general

uhhh the vallaslin (elf face tattoos) of my 4 dalish characters are:

eira = ghilan’nain (chose em cuz shes rlly interested in the navigation aspect of the goddess)

alas = falon’din (god of the dead n he picked them because he’s Also the god of fortune and alas is like tee hee fun but also he can and will kill u if u fuck with him so yk its fitting)

hela = june (god of the craft bc she likes to Make things but june is also the god who taught the elves 2 hunt and hela is. a hunter.)

mal = elgar’nan (allfather/god of vengeance bc. she is Vengeful. she is Angry. but yk fucking with shem politics and fucking their divine is like. mal may have little a retribution. as a treat.) yes she has the full half-face solid colour tattoo she does NOT fuck around.

bronson and bryant r not genetically identical but they Look similar enough 2 anyone who doesn’t know them well enough 2 play spot the distance. anora and bronson think this is a super fun game to play, especially when nobles realize they’ve swapped out the king but they’re too nervous to say anything

eira mahariel has two hands. one is for holding hands with alistair and the other is for throttling elven gods, apparently. she’s killed one before so solas she’s coming for your bitch ass next. watch urself.

speaking of eira and alistair are married thru dalish tradition and humans don’t recognize it n alistair loves 2 re-propose to her with random things. he’ll just pick up like. a bit of cheese and be like “marry me ;)” and she’s like GASP but whatever will the chantry say!!!! all of their friends r sick of them

“vhenan if you love me bring me a sword” “you think i could do better than a sword made out of space rock?” “:)”

eira is my youngest hero at 18 at the start of her game and kat is my oldest at 32 at the start of her game.

none of my hawkes are under six foot. rhett is the tallest (6′8″) and rads is the shortest (6′2″).

syracuse trevelyan would have been the Perfect inquisitor if he were not a pretty boy himbo and a gay bastard who does Most Things just to spite his parents.

[corypheus pointing at syracuse’s visage in his crystal orb thingo] i want that twink obliterated

i love the companions from older games return thing i truly do so i make it a point for Every companion to return in inquisition so the gang rlly is all here because i am a Slutte for found family

i lie in my keep worldstates because i dont want to choose between hawke and alistair during here lies the abyss but i never make him king and every time i play inquisition and cole has the wicked grace line it makes me Scream. alistair baby im so sorry i did this to you but i didnt actually do this to you

yes this is my everyone lives au but like. all the time. i have never left hawke in the fade and i do not intend to.

fuck whatever nonsense about wardens not being able 2 have kids. by sheer divine power (me) anora and bryant have three daughters; eleanor, sabina & cecelia n both bronson and zevran make Excellent uncles because i think anora deserves good things because i’m tired of bioware being like women bad, actually,

so like most of the time i have the warden & hawke turning up after the move to skyhold n then staying on, with the exception of bryant, carmine & mal. mal is as mentioned previously just There the whole time with her girlfriend. bryant steps in as king of ferelden w/ interests in closing the big hole in the sky spewing demons in2 his kingdom yk. carmine shows up because she wants to help & she wants protection for bethany but she outright says she’d rather die than be inquisitor so cassandra is shit out of luck.

“CHANGE HER MIND VARRIC” “she once doubled down on insisting amaranth was a shade of blue because she didn’t want to admit to being wrong. no one’s changing her mind seeker”

alas is the middle child of eight and is thus very good with children and also bossing around people older than him. 2 of his older siblings come to the inquisition when stuff in wycome has been settled

i left ash with the basic canon background with Some variation (he grew up under the qun and left of his own free will when his magic was discovered n he realized he couldn’t take living as a saarebas

kat on the other hand was raised tal-vashoth and has bounced around basically all over thedas and leads her own merc company when the conclave blows up. she also speaks multiple languages. is there a language she doesn’t speak? probably not

just realized how long this got so im gonna like. stop my general rambling now but lmao yeah theres some basics. waves hands.

[jananabread]

Lydia - Reminisce

Hey, so I did some writing, it’s a 1800 word or so piece of fiction about a Noble lesbian couple. It was super fun to write and I think I might do some more with these characters/this setting in future!

If you enjoy it reblogs and stuff are appreciated.

[CW for blood and death]

“We met at a ball, at least I believe that’s the first time we met”

The words left Lydia’s mouth without her realising she’d broken the silence as she gazed vacantly out at the vast fields she was meant to inherit, now aflame. She slowly crouched then sat cross legged as the sunset began to dye everything not lit by flames a deep golden orange. 

“Father had me in a dress he’d had tailored based off of old measurements and his sense of fashion, which is to say it had far too much gold and silver thread woven into it for my taste, I have worn chainmail that’s less heavy. This is to say, I was thankful I’d smuggled my suit in with me.

“I think, some part of him actually cared if I was happy with who I was married off too, that part must have been largely ignored in favor of his incessant want to ‘secure a strong blood-line’ or to attempt to play some role as a genius social manipulator within all of this mess.”

The sun, hanging low, caused Lydia to appear entirely golden, glowing. The light trapped in her long white hair, as her pale hands undid the binding that kept it in a tight bun it fell over her back, strands of it catching on the studs of her leather armour. The blaze, burning through the fields of wheat, had begun to engulf a windmill. There was only another hour or so left before it wound its way to the ancestral home of House Mordia. 

“Of course, I never was one to indulge father’s plans, this was always going to be the end result” She remarked, her head indicating the flames creeping up to the gates of the estate.

“That night, However, had she not been there. I would have been on my best behaviour, but to see her, in black and gold, forgoing the colours of her family to dress in the garb of colours chosen entirely of her own volition. I felt almost compelled to watch as she glided through the ballroom, enchanting everyone she came across, a smile and a polite laugh being all they got before she had drifted to another group. She was radiant, glowing and seemingly entirely unreal as she finally approached me.

“I’d been talking with some barons from the western stretches, saying how lovely it was to make their acquaintance, the usual pomp. She caught me off guard as she approached. For someone who had such a presence her footsteps were so quiet, for someone so mesmerising it was almost a shock to see her approaching me, eyes locked. Her visage, such as that of angels, was even more beautiful up close. I nearly found myself too lost in the forests of her eyes ask if she cared to dance.”

A torn banner off in the distance was kissed by the embers as winds pushed the fire closer and closer to the manor Lydia had spent her youth. Silver and blue were on their way to become blackened ruins of their former bright selves. 

“Fortunately, for myself, the answer was yes. We made a rather large impression that night, her in colours of no house in particular, and me, outside of the garb one might call traditional for my gender. Spectacular as both of us appeared, I have to say that it’s a miracle the two of us were able to dance quite as well as we did. Somewhat talented though I am, she did confess to me that she was normally rather terrible at it herself. 

We spoke a lot that evening, spending most of it neglecting the particulars of us being there. Awful dancer though she was, her way with words more than made up for it, her articulation leaving me feeling more flustered than any point we were in contact. 

Do you want me to continue?”

Lydia tentatively glanced to her side as she said this, finally having worked up the courage to check on her companions form. Emile was still, in the light of the fading sun he almost looked peaceful, his dark hair appearing wet from rain, as opposed to the copious blood loss of losing his ear. The light glistened off of his breastplate, making the rift in it even more apparent. His ragged breathing had steadily slowed more and more, the sound was absent now, the crackle of distant flames and the sound of the wind being the solitary thing to keep silence from setting in. 

“I suppose I’m already aware of the answer, you always hated unfinished stories. Very well, I suppose I shall continue, you always were insufferable about this sort of thing and I don’t think it’s fair to stop humouring you now.

“We spent some time that evening planning possibilities of correspondence, planning how it was that we should continue the romance it appeared had formed between the two of us. We settled on the idea that, as opposed to spending time discussing things through letters, that because of the relative proximity of our lands, we should simply meet and as we would both be able to manage a relatively short journey. 

“The next time I saw her was in neutral territory, it belonged to some baron, Durst I believe, We met in an inn that surprisingly, served finer food than I have been served at several banquets. We spent the night drinking, jesting and flirting, of course. We planned to go hunting in the nearby forests the next day. However, would you imagine the shock we both felt upon finding the Inn in which we stayed only had one bed prepared for us, something neither of us could have expected.”

A small smile crept upon Lydia’s face, the embellishment somewhat cliched among romantic stories, normally such a detail wouldn’t be and addition Lydia would have considered. However, Emile always did enjoy cliches in stories of romance, even if the ending was unfortunately predictable. 

“The next morning I learnt that though she had a hard time picking up footwork her skill with both Crossbow and Rifle were unmatched. She managed to secure both a boar and deer that day. We donated the meat and pelt to the tavern owner and the next time we visited the place, two new trophies were hanging upon the wall. 

“I don’t know if you’ve ever seen someone you already considered beautiful show off a talent she kept almost entirely hidden from you. It was as if another face had been shown to me, and it was somehow just as beautiful despite being kept hidden.

We made trips to that Inn happened every two months for almost a year, we attempted writing letters, however we both found it only made us long for each other’s company even more.

“Eventually a point came when we decided that meeting for only two or three days at a time simply wasn’t enough. We organised a trip to a cabin in the middle of her territory, in the mountains. We intended to spend a week or so there before travelling back to our respective families. This “Hunting Trip” was the point I intended to discuss some things with her in more length, regarding the future of our relationship. I believe at that point I would gladly have given anything for her, even my title as Heir. She was worth it.” 

Lydia’s eyes dropped at this. Though she had been content to gaze at the flames as they licked up towards the mansion she ish to watch as they began to catch it’s walls, beginning to end the legacy of her house for good. Unable to place her eyes anywhere else but her friend she opted to close them, images of her love filling her mind. 

“I believe you’re smart enough to know what interrupted all of that.

I don’t think the surprise and frustration I felt at the declarations of war being formed and sent out was anything in comparison to my worry for her. My mind raced to figure out which side of the battle-lines her house was on, to see if there would be any way I could protect her. I felt my heart break upon the realisation that, try as I might, I wouldn’t be able to. I am not a religious woman, I still prayed that I wouldn’t face her on the battlefield.

“She was here. I wish I didn’t know she was but amongst the chaos I saw what hit our flank, A cavalry unit, all wielding rifles and muskets. I almost didn’t notice them, they were in the shadow of the forest, but I saw the gold glinting from their uniforms. I attempted a counter-charge but, well you know how we paid for that. I wonder if she paid me any kindness, knowing I was here, knowing I might have been hurt. 

“It would have been a weeks time I would have seen her again. There’s an irony, I believe, to the fact that I no longer have to give up anything to be with her. I don’t know if Mother, Father or either of my brothers managed to retreat successfully. It’s not like there’s much left anyway.”

It took Lydia another moments to pry her eyes open, to look at her dead friend, and the dying fires of a land once meant to be hers. The sun still shone, though it’s light was slowly getting dimmer and dimmer, leaving the fires of the mansion to cast flickering shadows in the woods near it, as though there may still be something living within them. It took another few long moments, and a great deal of effort for Lydia to stand. She briefly unsheathed her rapier, running her eyes along it’s blade to check if it had been chipped or damaged within the previous battle. 

“I am sorry, my friend, that the last story you heard took so long for me to tell you, and that you were unable to hear all of it. That said, I hope you are satisfied Emile. May the ravens feast on you, as you always said they would. I may join you soon. Fool that I am, I intend to find her, though I am not sure yet as to my purpose. Though I would, in my anger, run through with my blade. I still want to kiss her, to join at her side, to be with her once again.”

With that, Lydia turned away from the departed friend, one who had seen her through so much, who had aided her to leave unnoticed for a year, without much questioning. She began to walk towards the path left by the army that had just pushed through, the best route to her lover. Though not a religious woman, Lydia prayed she’d find her in the best circumstances.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

🏰⚔️ DMODT 17... bed time for me!

Eren's heat was a beautiful thing, the omega so soft and warm in his hold. Sleeping in his arms, Levi couldn't stop himself from stealing soft touches. Eren's smooth and soft stomach was distended with his seed, the swell barely noticeable, yet drove his alpha wild. The way Eren moved. The way his magic wrapped around them as if creating a world in which only the two of them existed. The soft whispers of "thank you", "my master", and declarations of "my alpha". He didn't want their time to end. He didn't want to return to life outside their room. There were so many things to do, and he and Eren had barely talked. Perhaps because of their combined heats and ruts starting early, or their compatibility, instead of 5 days it lasted for a full seven. Having fallen asleep in Eren's arms, the last thing he'd expected was to wake alone with sunshine streaming through the windows... which had been repaired. He doubted Eren knew the chaos or damaged he'd caused in his fevered state, but he also hadn't expected to be waking alone... or to feel so incredibly lonely because of it. It was ridiculous. He was a grown alpha, yet when he woke, he'd felt for a moment like he was back on the streets starving and neglected. Checking the bathroom, he found Eren had showered before he left. That probably meant Eren was ok then. Cleaning himself up, Levi hated washing Eren from his skin, and he bitterly regretted not sinking his teeth into the teen's nape. Eren had offered his neck up so many times, but each time Levi had fought down the desire as he reminded himself that there was a whole world out there that Eren had yet to see. In a way, they was trying as good as bonded anyway, but not the way he wanted to be bonded with Eren in the future. * Eren was busy... hiding from Levi in his original room. He wasn't embarrassed over sharing his heat with Levi. Just everything else that had come after it. His heart was still racing and his mind was scattered over by everything that had happened since waking to find glass across Levi's quarters, then finding most windows covered when he stuck his head outside in an attempt to figure out what had happened. He'd use his magic to repair what he could in the castle, absolutely mortified to think about what his loss of control has caused, and equally as mortified that he'd given up so easily. Levi was getting married. The man had said that he was what he needed "right now". Right now wasn't the future and Eren's future was in doubt. Using Levi's personal bathroom, Eren had been shocked to see himself in the mirror of the man's bathroom. Along both cheeks, beneath his eyes, were two fine lines of small green and silver scales, that glittered and changed colours depending on the angles. While peering at them, he'd noticed a small amount of dried blood on his nape. Rubbing the peeling skin across his nape had revealed even more scales in the shape of the vow there. There were no words for the panic he felt at the sight, nor the confusion. He didn't know why scales would appear across his flesh, but they appeared to be the only ones on his body. And nothing else had changed in his appearance. He still had his scars of his misspent youth. His hair was still shaggy, not quite long, and not quite short. His eyes were still the same green they'd always been. He'd even checked his teeth and nails, relieved to find they hadn't turned into something monstrous. But he was so fucking scared by the way he looked... and sure Levi would take one look and be disgusted. He couldn't face the man. Not until he found some way to cover them, and had some kind of answer for why they'd grown. Despite his hiding, Levi found him. Probably using their bond to track him through the castle. Staying buried in the thin sheets of his old room, Levi had been annoyingly concerned about him. If he wasn't so scared of his new appearance, he would have wrapped his arms around the alpha and soaked in his comforting touch. With the command in place, it was hard to find a way to tell Levi he just needed time to recover after his heat, without lying about his current medical health... or admitting to Levi that he may have done something awful. Making him promise to talk later, Levi left him to wallow over his earlier choice to send a letter to Draecia. Scales had to be dragon related... and he vaguely remembered Levi saying something about them visiting Draecia before losing himself to whatever his magic had decided to put him through. Part of him wondered if it was because he'd touched the dragon's corpse, or the egg and sword without showing proper respect. He didn't want to be alone, not after being the centre of Levi's word for the last few days, but what else could he do? Levi was to be wed, and now he was some kind of freak. * Sitting in the sunroom, life seemed to particularly dislike Levi. The court advisors hadn't found anything about marriage arrangements made by Marley being legal and binding, but every aspect of the castle's day to day running had been affected by Eren's storm. The court mages had done what they could to repair the castle, but the wild winds had torn through their magic, with most inhabitants forced to take shelter in rooms without windows, such as the library. The problem was the woman sitting across from him, with her father. Erwin had been pissy enough about the damage to his castle, though Eren had repaired some of it. As was he pissy that the militaries training oval was now a field of sprawling white roses... so standing behind him, he could hear the constant grating of Erwin's teeth as he tried to keep his cool. Of all the days Petra has to come, it'd been the afternoon he'd come out of his rut and into the shit storm. Petra's father had already decided the wedding would be going ahead, mentioning that the woman intended to give herself to him. Petra had blushed deeply, but hadn't denied it. The woman dressed in the finest deep blue dress she owned, or so Levi guessed. He wasn't particularly into clothes and fashion, with his interests limited to the face he couldn't deny he preferred Eren wearing none. He'd hoped to have the four of them sit down to speak, yet there they were. The wrong four of them in an awkward silence that still hung from Levi saying he didn't wish to be wed. "Are you saying my daughter isn't good enough?! Are you implying there's something wrong with her?!" Pushing his chair back, the old man looked almost desperate as he slammed his hands down on Levi's desk. Petra was trying to keep it together, but Levi could smell the pain in her scent, and see the fine twitch in her cheeks "I never said there was anything wrong with Petra. I am merely not in the position to marry. I'm sorry you were given the wrong idea, but this was arranged by Prince Zeke of Marley, without my knowing or permission" "Then why... Why did you tell him that you liked her?! I met the Prince, and he assured me that you..." Petra placed her hand on her father's arm "The decision has been made, father" "But Petra, your reputation..." "If the crown prince finds me lacking in some way, then that is all there is to it" "The whole kingdom knows you are to be wed! You! You've destroyed my daughter's honour and reputation! Is this just a game to you?! To destroy everything Petra has worked hard to achieve!" Levi had had enough. Rising to his feet, he fought down a growl "Your daughter has fallen victim to an unfortunate rumour and misinformation. I may have expressed admiration for her skills, but I assure you that was all there was to it" "Surely..." "I have a lover already! I am sorry this is not what you want to hear, but you are free to stay within the castle until the situation is sorted" Erwin and Eren were both going to scold him for letting it slip... "If you have a lover, why would you ruin my daughter like this? What man will her marry her now?" Or woman. Really, there were no end to those who'd heard of Petra's bravery in battle "I had no say in this decision. It was made by Prince Zeke and if you are seeking some form of restitution, then you need to write to him. Petra, I am sorry you've made this journey to hear this news, but I had intended to contact you before the storm hit and threw everything into chaos" Petra swallowed hard, her eyes slightly wet as she nodded "I appreciate your honesty and hospitality. My father and I would be grateful to accept" "Good. Levi, please see that they are made comfortable. I have my own letter to Prince Zeke to pen" Actually, he didn't. Erwin wouldn't let him express his anger via letter, but he needed to bring the meeting to a close before he ended up making things worse. Plus, he wanted to check back in with Eren. Erwin had said Eren wasn't in his room, so it'd taken trekking through the castle under the pretence of checking for damages, to track the mage down to his old room. His tall blonde bodyguard hadn't been impressed to find he'd been tricked. The whole atmosphere between them had been odd. He'd made Eren promise to talk to him, but he'd never be able to make it through the day unless he made sure the omega was actually alright. Clearing his throat, Erwin moved around the desk, gesturing to the door "Yes, Prince Erwin. Please, won't you both make yourselves comfortable in the sitting parlour. The maids will bring you whatever you need, and notify you once your quarters have been made ready" Collecting herself, Petra adjusted her tight dress, leaning forward as she did as if a pair of tits to the face, was going to change anything at all "Prince Erwin, I trust this won't affect my military rank or position?" "No, Miss Ral" "Thank you. I guess we shall see you for dinner?" "Indeed. Once again, I am sorry for this" "As am I" What the hell was he supposed to say to that? Her "sorry" was most definitely not the same as his, and though he'd made the offer for her, and her father, to stay, he hadn't actually wanted her to... he just thought it was what he was supposed to do. Watching the trio leave, Levi was just about ready to kick the old man through the door. If he thought dragging his wrinkly old arse slowly, was magically going to change Levi's mind, he was wrong on too many levels for the human mind to comprehend. By the time the door closed behind them, Levi swore he'd grown at least a dozen grey hairs. Gathering up his papers, he didn't want it to appear as if he'd bolted from the responsibility the first chance he got, even though he technically was... but then again, Eren was his responsibility. And they could hardly afford another storm. Which was all the more reason he needed to figure out what Eren was hiding from him. Rushing from his room, Levi smacked squarely into a solid form. With everything happening, he'd forgotten that Farlan and Isabel lived in the royal capital, and that they would have heard of his royal engagement. Caught in Isabel's hold, Levi was like a fly in a web. There was no way he was getting out of this one without some kind of miracle. A miracle that didn't come. * Levi kept his word, and didn't come to visit him until long after the sun had set. Covering the glow stone in his room with a blanket, the light in Eren's room was just enough to move without tripping. The omega had napped, then spent most of his time staring out his window at the world. He'd tried to lift the scales from his face, clawing at them until blood had mixed with his tears, the mess rolling down his cheeks as he cried over the futile struggle. He couldn't get his nails beneath them, and the tiny scales at the edges that did lift, left him screaming with the pain lifting them tried to bring. He felt disgusting. He felt like his whole life had been some kind of lie. That the person he'd been before they'd formed, had tricked everyone into liking the monster he didn't even know he was. Sitting on the window frame, Eren was wrapped in another blanket, jumping when Levi knocked, despite knowing the man was coming. Clearing his throat, he didn't know what to say "Eren?" "Come in" Listening to the door creak open, then closed. Eren's heart started to race. There was anger in Levi's scent, but he could tell it wasn't directed towards him "Eren?" "Sorry. I'm just feeling a bit down right now" "I was hoping we could talk" "About what?" "You and me? I know it's not the best, but Petra came to the castle and I've told her I don't intend to marry her" There couldn't be a "you and me". Eren doubted that Zeke would let Levi just walk away from the marriage... and he could be with Levi while he looked like this "Eren, please. Will you look at me?" "I'm sorry..." Levi's boots clicked as he approached, Eren not expecting it when Levi wrapped his arms around him from behind. Letting out a sob, he lashed out, pushing Levi away as he screamed "Don't touch me!" Despite his outburst, his magic didn't flare. He couldn't hurt Levi. He just couldn't do it... he'd tricked Levi and seduced him... "Eren? What's wrong? Are you hurt? Did someone hurt you?" God. Why did Levi have to care? "I'm... I'm a monster..." "Your magic went a little crazy, but the castle's been taken care of. And most of the windows probably needed replacing" "No. Me! I'm wrong. I'm a monster, Levi. We can't ever be together. You need to marry Petra, or Zeke might..." "I don't need to marry her" "You do. You deserve a normal life" "There's nothing normal about my life, and I've made my choice. I want to date you... I've fallen for you" Eren hated how happy that made him. He couldn't be happy. When Levi saw his face, he wouldn't understand "Y-you're wrong. It's lust, not love. Even if you don't love Petra, you could make it work. You're a strong man, Levi. Maybe even the strongest in all of humanity" Rejecting Levi, felt like he was cutting off a limb. The man had become his support, but now he was cutting his own leg off "But we aren't a thing. We don't have feelings for each other. You are my master, and that is all it is" It hurt to hurt Levi, and it hurt to fight the command on him. Sinking down, he covered his face. He'd told himself that he wouldn't cry. That pushing Levi away was for Levi's own sake... "If that was true, you wouldn't be so pained..." Striding over, Levi tore the blanket off the glow stone, Eren letting out a cry as he tried to hide his face "... and if it is true, I want to look into your eyes. No one is as bad at lying as you are" Moving to squat in front of him, Levi wrapped his hands around his wrists "Don't! Don't look at me! Please. Please, don't... please" "Why? What are you hiding?" "I'm disgusting! I'm disgusting... I'm disgusting..." "You're not disgusting. Just show me your face" "I don't want to... please don't make me" Levi tugged on him, so Eren was almost in his lap "Eren. Hey. Nothing about you is disgusting. If someone hurt you, or if someone hurt you, I need to know" "God! No. No one hurt me. Please, don't look at me. I don't want to fight" "I don't want to fight either. But you're all I've thought about it. You and I. I told Erwin that I have feelings for you. I do. I don't expect to jump right into courting, or anything more than you want to give. I... I want to date you. I want to see where this goes" "It ends with you marrying Petra" "Get it through that thick skull of yours, I'm not marrying her!" "You don't have a choice! If not her, Zeke will keep going! He hates me! I stopped them taking the egg and the sword, and this is his revenge. Taking the man I'm fucking out of the picture" "I don't care if he does! We can..." "Go to war?! How many people died in the last war?! My mother was killed! My father went missing! Armin lost his grandfather and that was just us! Every day, people will die. Eldia isn't strong enough to repel an attack, and it's not just us. Draecia will be drawn into it. Eldia has dragon items that Marley's after..." This was bigger than him and Levi. This was thousands of lives, both on the island and the mainland... "I don't care. Now, show me. Nothing you show me is going to make me hate you" "You can't know that" He was wavering. He'd steeled his heart and tried to lock his growing affections away "I do. Now show me" Letting Levi pull his hands from his face, Levi swore softly "What happened?! You've got blood across your cheeks... you're filthy with it" "I couldn't get them off" "Get what off?" Could Levi not see them?! "T-the scales" "Scales? You know what, enough. We can't talk here, like this" "S-sir?" "Don't start with that "sir" shit. We're going back to my quarters, and we're going to talk all of this out" "I don't think I should" Eren was exhausted from crying. He couldn't remember the last time he'd cried so much, and he hated himself for it. He just... he'd let himself fall for Levi, now the man engaged, and Eren had just found out he was a monster who'd grown scales and half destroyed the castle. It was... a lot, especially with his hormones all over the place from his heat. Levi wouldn't let him walk, no matter how many times Eren tried to. Brought into the man's bathroom, he'd hid his face from the guards, who had to know more about their sex life than they'd ever imagined. Sat on the edge of the bath, Levi retrieved a cloth, wetting it then taking to his face to scrub at it. Whatever Levi was feeling, he knew his expression neutral until the blood was gone. With the silence between them too much, Eren let out a shaky breath "Do they look bad?" "No. No, they don't..." "I'm a monster, aren't I?" "You're not a monster. These are just... unexpected. When did you notice them?" "When I used your shower. They're on my neck too" Leaning forward, Eren pushed his hair out the way so Levi could see "Your whole vow is made of them" "I know... what does this mean?" "I have no idea. I assume you didn't do this intentionally?" "No. I... I can't get them off" "Sit up properly so I can take a look" "I'm sorry. I didn't know I wasn't... right. I didn't mean to trick you" "You think you tricked me?" "I tricked everyone, didn't I? I thought I was a mage, but it turns out I'm a monster" "You're not a monster. Let me ask you a question. Did you know about this?" "No" "Then you didn't trick anyone and you didn't lie" "But what am I?" "I have a suspicion, but I won't know for sure until I send a letter out" Eren shot up in shock. He didn't expect Levi to have the slightest idea, yet the man did! "You've seen this before?! Please! I need to know! I wrote to Draecia, but I haven't heard anything!" "Calm down. You wrote to Draecia" "I... I wanted answers. I didn't know what to do" "And you didn't think to talk to me?" "And say what? I broke the castle, but it's ok, because I'm a freak" "If you insult yourself one more time, I'm going to lock you in a room with Erwin" "Don't even joke about that. I don't know what to say to him. I blew out the windows, and then there's thunderstorm..." "And the rose field. Don't forget the rose field" "What rose field?" What the fuck was with him and roses?! And what rose field? There was no rose field on castle grounds. He definitely would have noticed if there was... "It doesn't matter. You were feverish from your heat" "It matters to me. Anyway, stop changing the topic, what are these scales? How do I get rid of them?" "Dragon riders from Draecia have similar. Though theirs are usually larger, and look more like gemstones than scales. They match their dragon" "They do?" Reaching out, Levi ran his finger tips to Eren's face "Yeah, along here, then where their hairline starts, just here..." Levi tapped the place Eren's temples lightly "... they flare into a large scale. It diverts the wind from hitting their ears when they fly. There's usually a few smaller scales in front. Their teeth are also sharper than ours, and their sense of smell is incredible. The first time I saw one, it scared the crap out of me" Eren had read the descriptions, but he'd never found an image of one in the castle libraries. Not that he'd gone out of his way to search for them "They're scary?" "They're built bigger than both of us. Even the women are taller, around the same height as Erwin, but thinner. Muscles and strength are prized attributes. They also have a longer lifespan" "Wow..." Levi let out a soft laugh. Eren's heart skipping a beat at the pure sound, as Eren blushed. Levi probably thought him stupid as hell for not knowing anything about their neighbours to the north "Trust me, they're scary as fuck, but if you show them respect, they'll return it" "I think I was polite in my letter..." He'd introduced himself and explained that scales had formed on his face and neck. And that he was a mage... that shouldn't be too bad? He was as polite as he could be, possibly to the point of rambling "I guess we'll find out. Even if they don't reply, we're headed up to Draecia in a few days" "We're" as in we. He and Levi... and probably Erwin. Would Erwin permit him to visit a place like Draecia? The idea of seeing the man was scary to him, as it had been to show Levi his scales "You said something about that before?" "You remember? I shouldn't be surprised. But yes. I told them I was bringing a young mage with me to return the sword and egg. I just didn't expect you'd suddenly sprout scales" Moving his hands back down, Levi ran the pads of his thumbs across the fine layer of scales "Don't be like that. I didn't either..." "I wish you'd told me. I want you to rely on me" It was too dangerous to keep relying on Levi... The man was usually so down to Earth, that he'd understand why saying "no" to this wedding would only lead to trouble. He couldn't afford to believe Levi's words, no matter what he and his omega felt for the man. He was young and naive, while Levi had been through hell and survived. Other than extremely compatible sex, what did they really have in common? Nothing... With the news of his engagement so new, he shouldn't expect the shock to have worn off so quickly. Once Levi's mind had cleared, he'd see that he only had on choice.