#stealth trans

[turtwig387]

If my friend is a trans girl who is presumably stealth and another friend of mine asks me if she's trans, what is it that I should say or do?

I hope this doesn't come off as ignorant or offensive, I'm just genuinely wondering what would've been the right response / course of action. And if I should do anything now.

(I told the asker it's not my information to tell and that I don't like that he’s asking, but I really was so bothered and I have no idea what I was supposed to do)

I suppose I could've asked her before hand if it comes up what should I say, but the thing is she never really talked about being trans so I didn't want to make her talk about it or make her uncomfortable

Also now that it already happened should I do anything? Should I tell her he asked or.... I think I shouldn't because it could make her uncomfortable? I don't know?

[bioplast-hero]

I'm still on my way

29k • explicit • BakuJirou

Jirou isn’t sure they’re ready for change, but it's miserable standing still. Katsuki is the only person who knows — who notices — and if that means he has a hand in helping them open up about being non-binary, that’s only the first surprise.

aka enby Jirou has gender feels in their final year at UA and Bakugou is by their side the whole way. T4T pride month special. ;)

[Read the fic on AO3]

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

[stories-from-a-stealth]

How I Started Being Stealth in School!

Woo boy, this comic took a while! Really hope this helps, just trying my best here :)

Also a special shout-out to @zj-needs-sleep who woke me up from my Tumblr coma and reminded me about this blog! Hope I can help you pass, man!

Also here's that final panel without the text, thought it looked nice :)

Thanks for the patience! Comics are gonna take a while to finish, sorry!

[gay-otlc]

The people who think gay trans man have straight privilege because they have the "option" to "escape" homophobia and live as straight women are blatantly disregarding the fact that for a lot of trans people, the options aren't "gay trans man" or "cis straight woman." It's "gay trans man" or "dead."

[trans-androgyne]

Interesting when people recognize that “afab only” housing is shitty but think “safe spaces” that exclude trans men for being men are totally fine. So it’s okay to exclude people for being perceived as inherently dangerous when you think it’s gender-affirming?

[lumberjackloverboy-moved]

Pride is here so yearly reminder that stealth trans people owe cis people absolutely nothing. what they do with their lives and their bodies is none of your business, and if they choose not to (or never to!) come out to you, then that’s that. cis ppl have no right to their gender, including during dating or on the job or with friends. Stealth trans people don’t need to be ‘exposed’ or ‘fixed’, they aren’t liars or manipulators. They’re just people

[kaibascorpse]

honestly i get so frustrated sometimes with the emphasis placed on ‘passing’ in conversations abt trans issues. like, i am nonbinary. it is literally impossible for me to pass around most strangers, because most strangers don’t even have a concept of gender that includes my particular identity and expression. even people who are ‘accepting’ of nonbinary identities are still more often than not going to make assumptions about what’s in my pants, and use that to label me as ‘girl nonbinary’ or ‘boy nonbinary,’ even if they never say it out loud. there is no way for me to exist as myself in a way that doesn’t visibly identify me as having a queer gender. i couldn’t be ‘stealth’ even if i wanted to because society has no framework for accepting people like me without forcing me into some kind of binary.

i have absolutely nothing against trans people who pass/are stealth or who want to be some day - all i’m saying is that we need to do better by nonbinary and gnc folks when we discuss these things. we need to acknowledge the ways in which we are so often left out of conversations and frameworks entirely, or only included as an afterthought (and again, still often expected to ‘sort’ ourselves into binary categories.) we deserve better than that.

[spitblaze]

You know I probably would have figured out something was up with me genderwise sooner if people assigned female at birth were not conditioned from a young age to absolutely loathe their bodies in order to sell beauty products and diets and unattainable standards

[hypogryffin]

i cant believe i wasn't following u b4,,,,,ive just been silently scrolling through your blog for like a solid YEAR and just haven't even noticed????? n e ways what are tha thoughts on literally anyone in p4 being trans bc i live for that 🎤

the way my brain decided that this was asking for pronoun headcanons and did not reread to make sure that was what you were asking before drawing all of this…... well anyways

[platodefide0s]

[nekhcore]

another one of my comics about being trans. this one’s from over a year ago when i was still working at a sportsbook (like a casino for sports bets)

[stories-from-a-stealth]

Happened the other day, why was this necessary info???

[sirenium]

You're allowed to like being trans.

You're allowed to hate being trans.

You're allowed to not feel strongly about your trans identity.

[genderqueerdykes]

I really like the reminder that "being out" or "being in the closet" isn't a zero sum game where you have to let absolutely everybody know everything at all times or else be totally hidden. You can choose to only disclose parts of your identity to certain people or in certain situations for any reason, that's been really helpful to me ad a queer person with a somewhat complicated personal identity that very few people know all the layers of.

this is a super awesome reminder! thank you, i think a lot of people can benefit from being reminded of this!

[trans-androgyne]

The moment a transmasc person stops identifying as a girl their misogyny is no longer internalized but oppressive? Really? Or could you take one second to consider the situation might be more complex than that.

[strawberrymeriadoc]

If you’re stealth this pride, you’re still a valuable member of the community. I see you posting on bottom surgery reddits or making your own tumblrs about transition and helping out the trans folks in the midst of their transitions anonymously. I see you sticking up for trans folks and using their pronouns IRL when no one else will. I see you taking on the role of trans ally and queer ally. I see you living your best life and doing what you want to feel safe and secure and affirmed in your gender. You’re a valuable part of the community and I’m sorry it feels really lonely sometimes when you can’t tell folks your trans history without suddenly their whole view of you changing. It’s not fair. But I know you’re out there and always have been!