Danny dies every night.
So! Danny's secret Ghost Powers remained a secret for about 6 Hours.
After turning back into a Human, he had immediately gone back to his room and tried to fall asleep, pretending none of it was even real, that it was just a dream. The idea that he had just died was understandably hard to swallow, not to mention the fact he had somehow come back.
All he wanted to do was rest and figure it out later. It was a problem for Future Danny.
Except when he woke up, something was wrong.
He felt Cold, Colder than he had ever been before. It was as if he had a chunk of pure Ice stuck in his Chest, the cold spreading across every part of his body. With a start he realized that his chest wasn't moving at all, either from the beating of his heart or the breaths he was supposed to be taking.
He wasn't breathing. His heart wasn't pumping. The Ice in his chest was the feeling of his heart not pumping, still and unnaturally cold. At that realization, he felt his Heart begin beating again.
He ran downstairs, hoping to get his parents help. He didn't know what was going on exactly, but they must be able to help him right?! They were the leading experts on Undead Biology, they must know how to help him!
When he reached the kitchen, he saw his parents and Jazz huddled together at the table, crying together for some reason.
"Mom! Dad! Jazz! Somethings wrong! I don't know what happened, but last night I-"
He stopped when he saw their faces. Their cheeks were tear-streaked, eyes bloodshot, but the thing he noticed first was the grief and absolutely confusion in their eyes. They were staring at him as if they had seen a Ghost, figuratively of course, and they seemed to he trying to connect the dots in their heads.
"Danny?" Jazz asked in a shaky voice. "Is that you?"
"Jazz?" He asked in return, "What do you mean, of course it's me?"
She looked hopeful for a moment, before his mom stood up.
"No." She said, her voice held a hard edge. "It's not."
Danny almost fell over when she said that. "W-what?" He asked, "What are you talking about Mo-"
"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" She yelled. She gripped the Blaster in her hand tighter, aiming it at him. "I checked everything when we found Danny's body! He had no Pulse, no Brain Activity, and his Ecto Levels were far higher than normal! Danny is Dead! And you killed him!"
"What?!" Danny yelled in shock, "I didn't kill hi-I mean, I didn't kill me-I mean-What are you talking about!?"
This time his dad answered, getting up from the table himself. In his hand was another Blaster. "Danny's Ecto Levels could only have been that high if killed by something with a large amount of Ectoplasm, enough to leave such a mark. The Portal was open for hours last night before we found it and sealed it up, and that's when you got through isn't it!?"
His Dad leveled the Blaster to him.
"No! I'm not a Ghost, it's me! It's Danny!?" He pleaded, "Mom, I always baked you a cake on mother's day! Dad, I helped you clean up the lab the last time you blew it up! It's me!"
"Nice try." His mother said, "Die again, Ecto Scum."
That day, Danny ran away from home.
...
Ever since that day, Danny had been running as far as he could from Amity Park.
After he got out of the house, he tried to find any place he could hide as he figured everything out. His first try was Tucker, but his parents had anticipated that and beat him to the Punch. The same happened when he tried to go to Sam's, he barely escaped that situation alive(?).
At first he tried to stay in Amity, hoping he would eventually find a way to convince his parents of his true identity, so everything could go back to normal.
He abandoned that hope about a week later, when his parents got the local authorities on their side and issued a public service announcement stating he was a Murderer who killed their son, and to contact the Police if anybody saw him. The mindless Ghost they captured and presented on the Local News cemented the publics view on him.
So he ran from Amity.
The first few weeks on the Run were the worst. He wasn't used to surviving on the street, much less evading the Law Enforcement that seemed to keep finding him. He had to constantly stay on the move to keep away from the pursuit of his Parents, the Police, and the weird guys in white suits who had shown up once he passed the State Border.
His new Ghost Powers were the only thing that had let him get away most of those times. He could turn into a Full Ghost whenever he wanted, unlocking all of his powers for the time being, but also seemingly sending up a Beacon to whoever was looking for him. He found it was much easier to use their weakened versions in his Human Form.
As for his Undead-ness, he had mostly figured it out. His body was lying to him. He was Dead, but his Body was just pretending to be alive for his own sake. He didn't need to breath anymore, and his heart didn't need to pump, but they did because he felt that they needed to. He probably didn't even need to eat anymore.
The problem was that it couldn't keep it up when he was asleep. No matter what, every time he fell asleep his Body would die again, and when he woke up he would have to make it Live again.
One of the main reasons he kept getting caught recently was because well-meaning civilians would report to the Police that there was a Dead Teenager under a Bridge, or on a Park Bench, or on one memorable occasion in a Ditch. He would wake up in a Body Bag, escape, and be reported to his Pursuers.
At least his pattern of movement was untraceable so far.
Turns out, the Portal's opening had much more of an effect than his parents had anticipated. The Shockwave in the fabric of Reality when they punched a hole through it (and him), had caused dozens of Natural Portals to form across the Country, opening and closing in random places, soaking the area of Ectoplasm.
As an apparent Ghost, Danny was somehow drawn to these places. Whenever he got to one he felt rejuvenated, as if the stress of the past few days had never happened to him. He could only assume that he was Absorbing the Ectoplasm in the area to feed himself, based on a few of the things he remembered from his parents constant ramblings.
Whenever he would go to one of these places, he would find a bunch of Ghosts. Some were friendly, defying all of his expectations, while others were...less so.
They seemed to resent the fact that he was still half-alive, some simply jabbing insults at him, others straight up attacking him. It seemed that Life was a sore subject among those guys. Or maybe it was him stopping them whenever they attacked humans...that was probably more accurate.
Sometimes the Ghosts he would meet were in the middle of attacking humans to fulfill what they called their "Obsessions". He learned that all Undead, and basically all Immortal Beings, have Obsessions. They are their Sole Purpose in existence, a built in defense mechanism against insanity by giving them something to dedicate Eternity to.
He didn't know if he had an Obsession, but if he did he hoped it was easier to manage than theirs seemed to be. One of them was obsessed with attention, but got it by hypnotizing humans into adoring her. She chilled out after a while. Another loved the thrill of the Hunt, but only wanted rare game. He chased after Danny a lot in pursuit of his "One of a Kind Pelt".
He fought then off and saved people whenever he could, although sometimes it was risky. Many of them were older and more experienced than him, so he was forced to use his Ghost Form against some of them, sacrificing his hiding spot to save the people being terrorized.
He sort of enjoyed it. Whenever he helped people, saved them from danger, he felt better about his situation. As if he was making the best out of the horrible situation his life had turned into by helping as many people as he could. He always felt a bit more motivated to keep going every time he helped anybody.
Maybe that was his Obsession? Helping others? He didn't really think so, he was nowhere near altruistic enough to consider that a possibility. Maybe it was Space? He always felt that same relief when he would camp out away from the Cities. Eh, he'll probably never know.
This cycle of finding a new hiding spot, getting discovered, and running away again continued for a while. Years even.
Danny had Died at 14. He was now 17, and had been homeless for 3 years.
He hoped this next hiding spot would last a bit longer than the previous ones. This one felt different, the Ectoplasm he was wandering towards felt older than the other places he had gone. His previous hiding spots had always been the site of a recent Natural Portal, and the Ectoplasm in the atmosphere would feel Fresh and Wild.
But the Ectoplasm where he was going tasted Older, Stronger, more Set in Stone than the others had. Wherever he wad headed to next, it had been soaking in Ectoplasm for far longer than any other place he had ever been, even in Amity.
He walked up the the Sign at the side of the road, introducing the City to newcomers.
"Welcome to Gotham City" it said.
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Really appreciate my partner being willing to listen to me while I vented things out about the recent drama here and then provide his own perspective, as a Latino (he's expressed he doesn't like POC as a term - too monolithic) looking in from the outside. Among other things, it reassured me that 1) it indeed wasn't worth getting into the weeds of it from where I've been standing, and 2) I'm nonetheless not being crazy or unreasonable for feeling what I do about this mess and the effect it's having on what should be safe spaces for all of us.
I'm gonna put some of those thoughts under a cut. And I'm considering turning off reactions for this post because while I hope it gets seen, I don't want to restart the discourse if it's dying down like I think (hope?) it is here.
At the end of the day, no one should be alienated for thoughtless mistakes (let alone personal preferences). But, those mistakes still need to be corrected, not just forgotten in the process of defending the one making them against harrassment.
And, by the same token, no one else should be alienated, either, for expressing that someone's stupid mistake is still hurtful. Nor should they be if they point out a lopsided amount of support to the other party involved, despite BOTH having been made to feel unsafe. This applies ESPECIALLY when all the facts of the situation aren't clear or present to everyone.
One person being threatened, and then feeling alienated enough to try to leave, has led to multiple other people then getting harassed, put down, dismissed, and/or alienated enough to also start leaving WHO HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE THREATS MADE AGAINST THE FIRST PERSON. And this is at least partially because all the relevant details surrounding the issue weren't put out at the same time, nor in the same places, and many people not even involved kept piping up in reaction only to what they DID see, rather than looking further into it, or even just waiting and listening first.
And to be just a little less abstract - guys - and by that, I mean to primarily address the other white people for this part - there's something to be said about white fragility here. Even without having spoken with the girl who accidentally kickstarted all of this, even though I can't confirm or deny it's actually the case, I'm still willing to bet money that that fragility had something to do with her initial reactions here being as strong as they were. I'm also willing to bet money that some of the people quickly jumping to her defense might have been feeling it, too.
When you take the anxiety already present from her prior harrassment, add in the pushback she got at the march for her mistake, and add whatever ??? negative messages she might have gotten privately during and after, if she did, that's already a bomb you've got there... and with white fragility on top of that, that magnifies the reaction by a lot.
The thing about that fragility is that it's often bad enough, and results in a strong-enough reaction, that it shuts down any and all conversation related to whatever triggered it. It's that cognitive dissonance that happens when you unwittingly do or say something racist, realize or (more commonly) get called out for it, and can't reconcile those facts with your beliefs that racism is not something good people do and that you can't be a racist, that's not what you're about - and it can lead to shutting down, tears, rage, denial, etc. And if you're engaging in any of those responses, 1) you're already stopping a needed conversation from happening, 2) you're making the other people involved feel unsafe and unimportant to you, and 3) you're encouraging others to come in to defend you and close ranks, allowing you to lick your emotional wounds while making those first two effects even worse.
It's not necessarily intentionally malicious? Given her behavior later, especially her apology... and her apparent disappearance right afterward... I don't think it was intentional on her part. It can certainly be weaponized, but it's also often a subconscious reaction (and that makes it even harder to address). But even though it wasn't intentional - it still caused a lot of damage! You can see that just from looking back through all the discourse and at how many other people are now disappearing or going on hiatus.
Again, not having talked to her personally, I can't confirm if that was also a factor. But it wouldn't surprise me at all. And none of us white folks are immune to it. None of us. If you had a strong reaction to the mention of racism in this discourse, and/or if you had one at the idea of your friend engaging in it... it was affecting you, too.
To step back from that part now.
Look.
Making sure that everyone involved in a community (or watching it) feels safe and welcome and heard is a balancing act, especially when anyone slips up. And guys, we borked that act up big-time.
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