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#take this whole thing with a grain of salt because it’s just my own personal thoughts
lume-nosity · 2 years
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it's ok ig... like we are awkward but he hasn't shut me out. i think, that he thinks i want something serious; no i don't. it's just a silly, "happy-happy" crush. tbh i want to tell him that, but i'm not sure because i wasn't even the one who said that i liked him 💀. i can't be 100% sure, because i asked him what my friend said and he told me that he didn't get what they said - but my friend who told him said otherwise.
so basically, we're awkward, still being shipped together, and terribly distanced.
i see, i do hope that didn’t affect your current status (whatever it may be) with him too much
the misunderstanding ☹️..
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noyasaur · 9 months
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make shifting fun for you ♡
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do you ever find yourself spiralling after every 'failed' shifting attempt? do you stress whenever you do your shifting method? or worry about what step is coming next, or worry whether you will shift? find yourself doubting your abilities?
shifting is supposed to be fun.
and this does not sound fun.
the number one thing i have been making sure to do when shifting, is to prioritise my comfortability and enjoyability when trying to shift.
i always try and make the process as enjoyable and comfortable as much as i can for myself.
shifting is supposed to be fun, right? it's exciting! shifting should be fun and enjoyable- heck, you're going to experience a whole other reality! a whole other life, a whole other self, experiencing your wildest dreams and fantasies!
how are you going to expect yourself to shift if you're still stressing over the process of shifting?
find or make a shifting method/process that'll make YOU enjoy shifting, and keep you motivated!
do things that you LOVE doing that will make YOU feel motivated to shift/more connected to your dr!
shifting should not feel like a chore. going to shift should not drain you. shifting should not be boring.
it should be a fun and exciting experience!
don't worry about what method is the most popular or most effective or easiest to the general community. ignore the trending shifting methods, subliminals, or guided meditations.
everyone has their own personal journey with shifting and there is no right or wrong way to shift.
focus on yourself first. work out what you like doing the most/what you enjoy doing the most, what your strengths and weaknesses are, and then work from there to find a method/process that works for you!
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for example, whenever i shift, i always ensure that during my method, i:
a ) am feeling good! that i'm feeling excited, happy, good, comfortable and am enjoying the ride! i do not force myself to shift if i feel drained, tired, bored, or i feel that i am forcing myself to shift (you can still shift when feeling these things btw! but for me, i don't like to because personally i don't get good results when i do. however, remember that this is just a me thing!)
b ) that whatever method or steps i'm doing to shift makes me feel confident and assured that I WILL SHIFT. by the 'end' or at some point of my 'method' i truly feel that i am going to shift and i can shift, and this whole thing isn't just me 'attempting' or 'trying' to shift.
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you love imagining random scenarios of your desired reality, but worried it's not 'proper visualisation' and you're just daydreaming or imagining? who cares! imagination IS reality and if it makes you feel closer to your dr, do it!
you hate visualising and you just want to say affirmations over and over again because that's what you're the most comfortable with and makes you feel confident, despite what other people tell you?
do it.
in my experience, all the times where i've just done whatever i feel like and makes me feel like i'm having the most fun, i end up feeling the most confident i ever will be in my shifting abilities! it's because when you're doing things you enjoy/love, naturally you'll shift to have a more positive and happier mindset!
it also helps me to stress less about the 'process' of shifting and rather, focus on the destination and anticipation of my desired reality!
however, this is just a small tip from me! please take this with a grain of salt 🌷
and if you've made it to the end, just know that YOU WILL SHIFT!
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kosmicdream · 2 months
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Hello. After drawing webcomics for 10 years and making about 10,000 pages of comics, here are some things i have learned/observed in that experience..
1) making comics does not get easier.. Not really
Making comics is a tedious and slow process and with so many different facets of the experience to learn - you’ll never run out of stuff to learn or weaknesses to work on. I’m not saying this to discourage but to just give the frank reality that it really takes a lifetime to understand. Be patient with yourself and try to set healthy expectations. 
2) Read your own comics after making them.
I don’t know if this is as important to other people as it is to me, but I do think that sometimes its easy to not re-read your own work and just go from your own memory of it, or maybe you’re tired of looking at it because of all the flaws. I don’t personally get sucked into the “rewrite/remake” cycle that I know is common with comics, as I sort of just accept things as they are, but re-reading my work does help me see where I have come from and where I need to go to next. I personally don’t like to lose sight of that, and I think re-reading helps ground me in the planning process of my work and gives me a better perspective on all aspects.
3) A lot of comic advice should be taken with a grain of salt, because its the person talking to themselves. (including this)
I see a lot of advice that never would have worked for me, or just simply wasn’t something I was ever going to follow. “Dont start with your big epic long stories”! Is a common one. I don’t think that’s bad advice exactly, but how many young artists are going to listen, especially if they’ve never told a story in the first place? Yes, the advice to start small and build yourself up with experience sounds great, I’m sure people do it, but if you’re an artist you’re probably not gonna be that responsible. And for me, when i tried to do this with eggshells, my house burnt down and i kinda gave up comics for a while because i lost a lot of work. 
Writing short stories is still something I struggle with, its just not easy for me. I have gotten better at it but i don’t think that makes me less of a comic artist because I haven’t gotten good at that particular format, or that I jump around on my projects. Is it more impressive to have more completed work under your belt, sure. But I also think that.. Idk.. what is the advice actually saying, because with that one it sort of feels (often times) as a warning that you’re setting yourself up for failure/embarrassment by attempting a comic like that. I don’t know how to tell you this, but comics are gonna be embarrassing no matter what you do and there’s no guarantee you’ll be more successful/not experience failure by avoiding your passions. Something to think about anyway. 
4) Don’t draw every leaf. Unless you really want to.
I’m the kind of comic artist that kind of doesn’t care about the art as much as the whole package of the comic. When i see a very impressively drawn panel/page, with laborious detail that is well drawn and maybe even colored ect.. That usually is kind of, I guess, a turn off for me as part of the reading experience. The thing is, when i encounter that, it usually signals to me that someone has poor planning skills for comics. It says to me that comic is probably not going to see its end or that artist is overworking themselves in an unnecessary way, that ends up concerning me about how they’re doing. Because i know how hard it is to draw comics. When an artist phones things in a bit, or has a limit on how much they work on a page, its a relief for me to see! because I understand they have healthier boundaries and expectations, and the art itself usually is less stiff too. This is all an overgeneralization, but I think with a lot of webcomic artists we are usually drawing a comic for the first time ever, so it makes sense we want to do our best and try as hard as possible - that just usually isn’t the smartest plan to put all the stock in the visual department. This also kinda frustrates me to see because most comics (professional or not) will also (generally) not reel the art in ever or make a more simple style. Generally I see it always trying to outdo itself, which leads to burn out. I personally only work about 1hr on each page i draw, that hasn’t changed in the 10 years I have been drawing comics, but i used to spend hundreds of hours drawing detailed lineart for eggshells and it didn’t even read well and i’d be disappointed with the results, feeling more lost with my goals than ever. PLEASe.. Just draw worse, its usually better looking in the end too. (because you wont have the experience to judge visual clarity until you’ve been drawing comics for a while imo..)
5) Don’t draw ahead, draw those inbetweenies.
“Inbetweenies” are the pages for the “boring” ones. They are also usually the most common KIND of page. Its the pages that are necessary, but “inbetween” the action. The impact moments in a scene, ect. You gotta draw them. They’re always gonna be there. They’re the pages where maybe, the character is walking somewhere, thinking, ect. The after impact from an action.. There’s a million examples, but hopefully you’ll understand what I mean when I say they’re both necessary pages/panels, sometimes so mundane/redundant, but also required for telling the story.. As a comic is a sequence of images. This is why, the previous advice is also important IMO- because if you really want to “draw every leaf” - maybe you should save that energy and effort for those impact moments that you want to impress the reader with.. And not for the inbetweenies, which are the foundational support, but also not the most important moments. If you conserve your energy a bit, the contrast OF that effort will also pop more. I personally find it funny when I put more effort into a page and end up tricking my readers into thinking I got better at drawing, when really i just have been able to draw better and only save it for moments like this instead of always.
Also, when I say don’t draw ahead.. I mean I draw each page at a time before going to the next one. I have no idea if this is an unusual practice or not, and I know a lot of people will draw their chapters/episodes/whatever in sections like sketch/ink/color/ect.. But I personally draw and finish page by page, unless its the thumb/sketch stage. Even then, i don’t go ahead much. I think that you can control flow/pacing better by doing chapters all at once of course, I see that as a benefit. But i also think that makes things very overwhelming and can also result in a lack of flexibility if something isn’t working. No matter HOW much planning you do- comics are always going to have an aspect of IMPROVISATION with the result you get in the end. There are way too many factors in play to be in complete control of all of them and always know the result of the reading experience. SO for me, this technique is easier and has been something that continues to get me to working effectively. Plus, rumiko takahashi said that’s what she does. And i think she has some of the best visual flow/compositions in comics. So that’s what I do.
I could write more personal advice or rules that i follow..but I think those are the ones I find are the most important to me anyway. Of course, comics are a strange medium and not everything that works for me will work for you. That’s all for now.. Bye bye…! 
Oh by the way, my comics are here: feastforaking.com nastyreddogs.com https://kosmic.itch.io/ Support me on patreon! https://www.patreon.com/kosmic
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homosexualworkaccount · 3 months
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Jason Todd’s “Replacement” nickname for Tim Drake, Origins and Popularisation
So, making a 2500-word essay on how a fanon nickname that only me and like two other people care about is not how I expected to spend my time in between exams.
A lot of Batfam fans are very, very much aware of the fanon “Replacement” nickname Jason has for Tim, and a lot of us very, very much hate it due to the connotations of fanon characterisation that it has. I don’t personally, I think it’s an alright enough one that fits into the established canon ones – but to be fair, I haven’t read the comics in a hot minute, so my memory could be screwy.
I got curious one day on where the nickname came from when a user on TikTok mentioned that it might’ve originated from a Batfam incest fic (They weren’t too sure and told me to take it with a grain of salt) – so shout out to them for starting me down this rabbit hole! I looked over on here and saw that notion repeated, though no one could pinpoint me to a specific fic beyond “It was popularised from a Batfam incest fic.”. I also saw a few people say that it was derived from canon, which piqued my interest further so I decided to go down a rabbit hole of fandom history purely for some fun.
The aim of this essay is just to clear up some misconceptions around the origin of the name, all fun and no harm. Don’t send harassment to people referenced in this either over a silly nickname, it's been well over a decade since they wrote the works used here.
Preface
Alright, first things first – all sources are going to be ones that were published after August 2005, the official date the first issue of Batman: Under the Red Hood was published, where Jason was established to be alive again.
While there could be a chance that the nickname was derived from a website/fanfiction before 2005, it’s highly unlikely due to the fact it was only popularised in the early 2010’s, and well, because Jason was dead and no one gave a shit about him. Also good to remember that most websites that ran before 2005 are defunct and purged from the internet now, particularly fanfiction websites (such as Quidzillia) due to various issues (taboo, copyright, costs to run ect).
Small note to make again – the Batfam fandom was fairly small at the time, the more fandom-y part of the DC community usually sticking to their own websites like Quotev, Quidzilla (again, defunct now), AO3, Fanfiction.net, LiveJournal and independent websites (again, defunct) while the rest stuck to discussion sites, so the entire fandom functioned more as a insular community from what I could tell. I will be working with the assumption that the nickname was created on one of the larger platforms, as any other platform didn’t have large enough influence to popularise the nickname.
The nicknames that I specifically looked for was simply Jason calling Tim Replacement in place of his actual name. Something like “Replacement Robin” was on very thin ice, but still counted as an offshoot. Anything else was off bets.
This whole thing will be split into a few sections to make some things for myself easier. Preface, Sources, Pre-cursor Fanfiction, Fandom Opinion and Language, First usage, Popularisation, Conclusion, Questions, Final Notes.
Sources
Fanfic.net – Created 1998, was and remains one of the larger fanfiction sites. Note; Fanfiction.net had various periods of time where there were large scale purges of fanfictions that held more mature content. Most notable instances were in 2002 and 2012.
Archive Of Our Own – The holy grail for my research. Created in 2008. For the information I got from there I used the search filter Date Updated, tagged Jason’s and Tim’s individual tags and followed from there.
Live Journal – Created 1999 and was used as one of the larger sites for fandom and fanfiction. Was used by DC fandom goers regularly so I used it to get an idea of the fandom at the time.
Tumblr – Created 2007. Theres various people on here who have compilations on DC timelines and comic sourcing that helped me correlate fandom growth with specific comic releases (Shout out to @ectonurites for their meta posts and timeline posts, they were a major source for this!). Dogshit filtering system, so I couldn’t find posts pre 2012 about DC.
Note; Quotev and Wattpad weren’t used in this as their filtering systems don’t account for searching for older fanfictions, so sadly had to be discarded as most fanfictions between 2006-2010 on those websites are now very difficult to find.
Pre-Cursor FanFiction
So, before we get to the actual first proper use I could find of “Replacement”, I first want to mention a fanfiction that had something very similar that I think would be important purely for archiving reasons around how the nickname came to be. And also because it fits the nickname criteria I mentioned earlier.
Published on the 29th of November 2006, last updated on the 28th of November 2007, was the fanfiction My-Enemy-My-Brother on Fanfiction.net by user theunknownvoice – featuring the first use of Jason referring to Tim with a nickname including replacement, Replacement Robin. Kudos to theunknownvoice, they created the very first nickname that would kickstart the rest.
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While Jason doesn’t explicitly refer to Tim as Replacement – the main subject of this essay, it comes very damn close, so I wanted to include it. There is a part where Jason repeats replacement in his head multiple times, and I think he’s supposed to be referring to Tim, but the sentence isn’t very clear on that part, so I won’t count it, but it is important to acknowledge.
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Though this isn’t the fanfiction that influenced the development of Replacement. This fic had barely enough reach to influence any future works years later. I couldn’t find any connection with this work and later works that officially did just have Jason call Tim “Replacement”
Fandom Opinion and Language at the time
I promise this is important and that I’m not a pretentious linguistic, English isn’t even my first language.
I like to think we all know how fandom discussion just seeps into fanfiction (See; the nickname green bean for Deku from MHA leaking into fanfiction) so I just want to quickly point this out.
Discussion around the two blew up after Jasons return in late 2005, people going “What does this mean” and “What does that mean for Tim”. Through the few posts I could dig up from this time and up to 2011, it seems people came to the conclusion that Tim was Jason’s replacement, and that their dynamic was Jason dealing with the fact that he had one. You can definitely see that in some of the posts and fanfiction written at the time that usually had Jason dealing with Tim being his replacement.
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(Just a few examples from LiveJournal but more like this are still floating around, if they aren’t deleted anyway)
It’s very likely that the authors themselves engaged in similar discussions/had independent thoughts that ended in the same conclusions, seeping into the fanfiction itself later. In the comics pre-New 52 I couldn’t find any major instance of Jason explicitly referring to Tim as his replacement (only implied through speech), so this was mostly contained in fandom discussions from what I can tell. (Note, this was probably similar on comic discussion websites, but I couldn’t find any that still exist pre-2007, so I’m going to assume literacy skills are not any better on those sites. See; Batman dick riders)
The fact that Tim is explicitly described as having replaced Jason, and sometimes as “Being the Replacement” on posts/fanfiction definitely had a hand in the creation and popularisation of the nickname, influencing the fan content made around the two.
First usage of Replacement
Cain! Cain! Is the first use of the nickname Replacement really from a Batfam incest fanfiction?
Nope, thank God.
After filtering their character tags together on AO3, going to the oldest page and clicking through over 10 pages, reading every single fanfiction on each one (yes, even the weird ones, I was dedicated) I found the first instance where Jason explicitly refers to Tim as Replacement, that still exists today anyway.
Published on the 24th of January, 2009 by user shiny_glor_chan, is the fanfiction Four Calling Birds, a fanfiction detailing Stephenie Brown returning from faking her death (a whole headache from the comics that I can't be arsed to explain) and getting to meet Jason and Dick for the first time. Genuinely sweet, and a corner stone of fandom history, officially. Hip hip Hooray! Congratulations shiny_glor_chan.
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I tried tracing to see if this person had any other accounts that I could find to see where they got the nickname from, but it seems it’s mostly a nickname they thought up out of the fact that they had consistently wrote Jason explicitly stating that Tim was his replacement
And reading through several more pages of fanfiction again, feeling like I want to bleach my eyes out, I found the second instance of the nickname being used. Published on the 26th of May, 2010 by user axiel-neesan, is the fanfiction The Only Piece You Get, where Jason basically acts as Tim’s cabbie and bonds with him. Another corner stone of fandom history, hooray.
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These two authors are completely unrelated and have no connections to each other besides both frequenting LiveJournal, having taken prompts and having friends from that website, despite having no accounts I could find. I personally think they had a similar train of thought of “Huh, that would be a sick ass nickname.”. Chances are that axiel-neesan saw shiny_glor_chans fic and got inspired as the fandom was dead small on AO3 at the time – around 20 pages worth of fanfiction from 2008-2010 (And thats being generous if we’re counting now deleted ones)
These two fanfictions are immensely important because it’s the only early instances I could find of the nickname being used, and for about two years after the nickname pops up occasionally – but by no means was it popular, or even regularly used, I had to look for the fanfictions that used it.
Props to shiny_glor_chan and axiel-neesan! I pray that you two don’t see what the fandom thinks of that nickname now.
Popularisation
Early 2012 saw the proper explosion of fandom for the Batfam, and by extension the nickname.
By this point there were so many fanfictions that I couldn’t read them all, so I started picking random ones that tagged Jason and Tims relationship, platonic or not. Pre-April-ish of 2012 the nickname popped up every other page or so, but sometime after mid-2012 the nickname was in almost every fanfiction that I skimmed through – so that’s its official growth period.
Why though? Several factors probably.
The New-52 was in full swing by this time, DC massively promoting the reboot to get new fans interested, so people picked up comics from there. Young Justice – the more mainstream exposure of DC to surface level fans aired its second season in April of 2012, introducing people to Tim Drake and his story and getting them interested. Fanfiction and fandom as a whole was becoming less taboo and more accepted in fan spaces, so encouragement to write it was much better than it was in the early years of the internet (Example; Teen Wolf’s production team)
As for a specific catalyst for the growth of popularity for the nickname? There might be something worth pointing to.
Kudos for @ectonurites for helping me on this (Hi Sam! I was anon!) and giving me a publishing date on Tim’s and Jason’s first New 52 interaction – Red Hood and the Outlaws #8, published on the 18th of April, 2012. It features an instance of Jason and Tim interacting in a very friendly and familial way, Jason explicitly calling Bruce their Dad. Compared to their last major previous interaction of Jason leaving Tim for dead, fans of the two who enjoyed the more familial potential (and tragically, romantic potential) took it and ran with it.
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All of these combined in some way to contribute to the popularity of the nickname in mid to late 2012, and lead to it’s infamy in DC fanfiction.
Conclusion
In conclusion, how do I think the nickname came to be?
I think it’s a combination of factors that led to it’s creation. As already established people very much did see Tim as Jasons replacement at the time, and the language could have shortened down from “Tim replaced Jason” to “Tim is Jason’s replacement” to “Tim is the replacement” which I think could be the train of thought the 2006 author went down to create the nickname Replacement Robin.
This definitely influenced the AO3 writers as shiny_glor_chan was present on LiveJournal at the time (where this language was very prominent), so they were already down the line of thinking this and probably went “Huh, replacement is kinda a funny nickname” and added it. As already stated, I think axiel-neesan probably had a very similar train of thought or may have seen shiny_glor_chan’s fic and was inspired.
And from there people saw it, used it in their own works, getting leaked over onto LiveJournal, which was the main website for prompt sharing, getting used a decent amount there before the explosion of fandom in mid-2012 that lead to it’s regular usage in fan works.
Questions
So, is the nickname from a Batcest fic?
Nope! The nickname mostly makes an appearance in platonic fics between Jason and Tim, it’s actually a chore to find it in their romantic ones, as in I think I found one instance of it being used somewhere in late 2010 but I can't think of it in a fanfiction that predates that. All early uses of the nickname were in platonic fics between the two.
I think this rumour is based around three fanfictions specifically on Ao3 that people are pointing to, I think, no one seems to be wanting to name names. They’re the ones that pop up when you search Replacement in the word search after tagging Tim Drake and Jason Todd together.
Wings to Fly. Published October of 2012. Jason Refers to Tim as Replacement. Jason/Tim
Replacement. Published 2009. The title implies it’s referring to Tim, but Jason never explicitly nicknames Tim replacement, the narrator only calling Tim “His replacement”, him being Jason. Jason/Tim. Non-con
The Replacement. Published 2011. Can't figure out if the title is supposed to refer to Tim or is simply just titled that for the sake of it. Jason talks a few times about Tim being his replacement, but the nickname never makes an appearance. Jason/Tim
Does the nickname have any bases in Canon?
From what I can tell, no. I haven’t read all the Batfamily comics Pre-New 52, or from after Batman: Under The Red Hood, I mostly stray towards Hal Jordans comics lol. I don’t think theres any major instance where Jason talks about Tim replacing him by specifically using replacement or replacing (It can be inferred from his speech sometimes, but Jason’s relationship with Tim was much more complex than that. I’d recommend reading @ectonurites metas about the two to get a better idea) Theres a few instances in 2015 post-New 52 reboot where Jason says explicitly that Tim replaced him, but that was way after the nickname was popularised.
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Red Hood and Arsenal #7 (2015)
Final Notes
That’s about it! That’s the result of my month long dive into almost twenty years worth of DC fandom history as a fun side project. Please don’t harass anyone linked here, this was just project to pass the time and not a call out post for anyone that did contribute to the popularisation of the nickname.
Feel free to ask me anything else about this or any other DC fandom history and I’ll try to research it!! This was genuinely a fun thing to do to pass the time and work out my research muscles.
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anemoiashifts · 2 months
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the first time i shifted & motivation in the shifting community.
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“this demotivated me”
“am i going to shift tonight?”
motivation should come from with within. if your belief is dependent on other people’s words then you are setting yourself up to get let down. if you can’t trust yourself on what you believe in, who are you going to trust ? when i see questions like “is shifting real?” then that tells me everything i need to know & you don’t actually believe in shifting or at the very least you don’t have a strong belief in yourself or the practice. it’s okay to question things but at the end of the day, you decide what resonates with you & what you believe in. you are looking for exterior validation & no about it “yes shifting is real”(’s?) will determine your beliefs. “is this a sign?” if you have to ask for & said sign does not resonate inward where you have an internal sense of knowing that it’s for you, then it’s not a sign. don’t go looking for things constantly because you will forget to appreciate when you do see something that you know is meant for you. the same goes for angel numbers. if someone says to you “you won’t shift” or “shifting is fake” why are you putting others words above your own ? at the end of the day, you decide who gets power over you & when you do you tend to lose sight your own power.
i hate to say this but it’s so easy to lie on the internet & you never know who is being truthful vs those who are doing it for attention or profit. which is why it’s so important to take everything people say with a grain if salt & it’s even more important to be your own advocate.
“but people have shifted without believing it”
okay? that’s them. but has that worked for you? stop using other people’s success’ as a crutch to not put in the work. i think that’s where people get stuck. seeing other people achieve their manifestations & desired with seemingly such ease frustrates us; “the grass is always greener on the other side”. what we don’t see is that persons own struggle within their shifting journey. we don’t know what they’ve endured or what conclusions they’ve come to to be “successful”. people don’t like hearing about struggles & the hurt that takes place when you’ve been trying to do something for a while that you so desperately want & i think that’s needed sometimes to balance the scales. it removes shifting from this higher then thou status people place on it. your resilience & powering through doubts should be celebrated.
for me personally, ive shifted once & ive never been able to to it again (excluding what people refer to as mini shifting). though, only recently have i started calling it my first time shifting because it pushed me away from shifting as a whole for a while. in my eyes, it wasn’t successful because i didn’t enjoy my time when i shifted that first time & i wasn’t sure what happened to me even if I did technically shift by definition. that definitely plays a factor in why ive gone years without achieving that kind of shift again & it can sometimes feel absolutely like a lost cause & like i wasted my one chance at it. i didn’t have a pleasant experience & that plays a part because I probably subconsciously became uncomfortable over the thought of it.
the reason i don’t speak about it in detail is because i didn’t want to turn anyone away from the desire to shift & inject fear into people. just because my experience wasn’t great doesn’t take away from the dozens of positive shifts. the human mind tends to cling to negative experiences even if it’s only one negative vs hundreds of positives. it’s important to observe past experiences because we can analyze what works & what didn’t. im happy that i shifted & im happy that im able to have my own unique experience with the practice. that bad experience made me dig into shadow work to uncover my lingering fears about going to a new place & the fear of the unknown — not just in shifting but discovering what i struggle with in general. then once im aware of them i can properly cope & address them. it doesn’t benefit only my shifting journey but my confidence & how i chose to live life. this is something i still struggle with daily & am learning to become better because of my negative experience. for lack of better wording, it made me face things are are unpleasant head on & the longer you stay in a bubble the more scary it’ll be once it pops.
sadly, some people have to put in more work then others to get things done to achieve the same results. ultimately, yes, it does come down to your core beliefs & your own confidence but practicing things like meditation & leaning / focusing skills to focus are things that may benefit you. this is why the concept of self is so important & to not become dependent on others experiences.
to clarify, i don’t hold an issue with motivational shifting content. i think it’s great way to help others & reinforce your own beliefs. the issue i have is that people forget that they can be their own source of motivation by looking to your own personal goals you’ve set for yourself. this had been said before but there is no one method that will make you shift, there is no one position to lay in that will make you shift, there is no routine or sole piece of information that will make you shift. you make yourself shift. sure, others can point you in the right direction but at the end of the day it was you. everything you need to shift already lives within you.
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cardboardheartss · 6 days
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NEWJEANS Overall Reading
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⚠️DISCLAIMER! TAROT CARDS ARE NOT 100% ACCURATE! TAKE EVERYTHING WITH A GRAIN OF SALT! IF MY INTERPRETATIONS ARE INCORRECT FEEL FREE TO CORRECT ME!⚠️
*NWJNS current thoughts*
Minji : 7oC rx
In all honesty, from my cards, it seems as if Minji still wants to continue fighting. She is aware of the consequences that she’ll be facing but she honestly wants to fight. It seems like she will continue to demand change within the company, she only demands change for the sake of maintaining NWJNS creativity and image.
Hyein : 2oC rx
Hyein is completely tired. She wants to end her contract with HYBE, she is aware of the issues that HYBE and Fraudor will put her through and for her own sanity, she really wants to leave.
Haerin : 3oW rx, 9oP rx, The World
Haerin honestly wants a break! She is tired, and is literally on the brink of losing her mind atp. Haerin is also aware that HYBE will sabotage the girls careers on purpose, and she honestly does not want that for herself. She just wants to possibly go on a world tour and continue her career as NWJNS before April.
Hanni : AoW, 3oC rx
Poor Pham Pham, this situation has really made her question herself A LOT! She probably sits in her room and asks herself, “Why am I here?” “Why did I choose the fame life?” “Should I even continue being in NWJNS at this point?” Many thoughts surrounding her current situation as a member of NWJNS.
Danielle : Judgement rx, The Sun rx, 6oS, KoC rx, KNoP
The hate comments are hitting Dan Dan really hard, she has had the most difficult time. Since I watch NWJNS content, I can tell that she is honestly outraged and depressed too. Her whole vibe and personality has just become so closed off, it’s actually quite sad to witness. She really hates BSH too, many many negative thoughts about that man. Just views him as a money hungry coward tbh.
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*thoughts on Jungkook’s support post*
Minji : QoC rx, WoF, KoS rx
“Oh no.”😤 She knew what was coming, the fans. She just knew that it will bring them more bad luck, because of the hate comments they’ll be receiving (which is happening as I type this). She’s thankful for the post, in a way but she knew that the fans will downplay this post and cause a ruckus.
Hyein : 3oC rx
She was worried about his fans turning against him. She is also worried about how the higher ups will react towards Jungkook after the post had been made.
Haerin : 5oW rx
She’s so glad someone with so much power finally stood up for her group. In the back of her mind, she’s probably thinking about how other groups could be envious about this moment that took place. Overall, she’s honestly really really grateful to have Jungkook on their side because she really thinks the group needed that one person to just shake things up a bit.
Hanni : 6oC
*do y’all know the “that’s a real black king right there🤪” sound from TikTok?*
Hanni in all honesty said, “that’s a real sunbaenim right there.🙂‍↕️” Wouldn’t be surprised if Hanni actually cried a bit after seeing that post and statement. She is soooo grateful, she honestly is so relieved to actually see someone with so much power and influence in the industry stand up for her group. She honestly is so grateful! My gut tells me that she probably saved that post as her Lock Screen or just looks at it every night for motivation.
Danielle : 8oW rx, Devil rx, The Empress
Initially, I don’t even think Dani was aware of the post. Poor Dani probably has her phone off or has deleted her social media for the sake of her peace. After she was aware of the post, she was quite taken aback because she doesn’t believe how Jungkook, actually had the guts to stand for NWJNS while being aware of the situation her group has with HYBE. She really respects him and applauds him for what he did.
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*overall HYBE groups thoughts on this situation*
5oC rx, 2oP
Seems like these groups really be avoiding each other like a PLAGUE! These groups are completely and totally aware of the support NWJNS has, and I could say it kinda rubs them off the wrong way because they’re going through similar situations but they’re not getting the support from the rest of the industry and majority of the population of Korea (before y’all come for me, yes, support from this population matters the most, I’m sorry… I don’t make the rules!) It seems like they’ll try avoid thinking of this, and focus on support they receive from their own fandoms and promotions.
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*will NWJNS stay in HYBE?*
5oP
No, the girls will eventually be leaving HYBE for good. In all honesty once again, these girls will have to leave this company for the sake of their own peace. They’re going to have many financial difficulties as they depart from this company but they’re going to have to either way.
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*outcome of HYBE, once NWJNS leave*
AoP rx, The Lovers, 4oP, 10oS
lol. they’re going to be broker than ever! they will attempt to reconcile with their stock brokers or brands, to jump start their stock market value again, but it seems like all these businesses will stay clear from them to protect their own money because they’re aware, they’ll not be benefiting themselves with working with HYBE. HYBE will have to work really hard for positive public support again but it’s going to take a while.
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*publics perception of NWJNS departure from HYBE*
6oW rx, Justice rx, Strength
the public will be divided ; Token/HYBE stans & Bunnies/K-Industry/Public & Rest of the public. The first group of people will be dissatisfied and angered by NWJNS leaving and claim that they’re ungrateful and stupid. The rest of the public will feel remorseful and encourage NEWJEANS to not give up but at the same time, should take a break!
OR!
the public will hate HYBE even more, and question their motives as a company overall. many people will not support HYBE any longer and believe they need their names tarnished as much as well. Would not be surprised if HYBE releases a media play article that day, in a celebratory manner about NWJNS departure but the public will remind them that they (HYBE) has not won in this situation, and will in fact be weak in terms of revenue.
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*NWJNS careers once they depart from HYBE*
everybody say this with me : “NEWJEANS NEVER DIE!”📢
Pregnancy, Open Up Your Heart, Communicate, Manifest, Caution rx
*while shuffling the cards, the words NEWJEANS entertainment, came out my mouth lol! I would not be surprised if NWJNS establish their own company or they could possibly be moving to a different company, depending on their financial positions*
Anyways, the girls will come back better than ever! They will be expressing their gratitude to all the people who were on their side from the very beginning til the position they’ll be in once they’ve departed from HYBE. It seems as if the members 11:11 wishes will come true, and they’ll be a bit more stable and peaceful but it also seems like the girls will overwork themselves a bit too much because they want to prove to HYBE or the public that’s against them, that’s NWJNS as 5 shouldn’t be underestimated.
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*individual messages from my cards for NWJNS members during this situation*
>this is so random lol but my gut is telling me to do this so I guess why not.🤷🏽‍♀️
Minji (Divorce) : my cards are telling her to consider canceling her contract with HYBE.
Hyein (Moving) : my cards are also telling her to consider canceling her contract with HYBE.
Haerin (Commitment rx) : my cards are also telling her to also just end her contract with HYBE.
Hanni (Health) : my cards are telling her to watch out for her physical and mental health! urgently so!💢
Danielle (Mercury Retrograde) : my cards are telling Ms Aries Mercury to hold herself back because people on social media will continue to attack her for what she says and supports.
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That’s all for NWJNS today! The cards came out a bit better-ish than I had anticipated. I’m just relieved and touched to see how NWJNS will be okay after this situation. It will take some time for them to get back on their feet but they’re honestly going to kill it!
nwjns never die!🩷💛💚💜💙👏🏽
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skeltrr · 29 days
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it's time for some p1 headcanons
My thoughts on p1 and the kind of guy he is have morphed around a little bit in the last year I've been into Postal. In fact he's gotten so much development it's probably safe to say I've created a whole new beast lmao. He is fairly removed from the guy in the game just by virtue of p1 dude having almost no characterization. Take it all with a grain of salt.
Anyway, lets get this goin.
First things first I want to talk about his personality. In the past I've talked about my hc that he is a very standoffish and rude kind of guy that would sooner take advantage of kindness than repay it. I still think this is a fair assumption to make considering P2's personality, but there is a little bit of nuance that tends to get lost when I talk about this stuff. I'll see if I can convey it this time.
P1's depression and anxiety are definitely present. In the past I may have made it seem like I think he's Doomguy, all beef and no fear, but that's not the case. What I think is that p1 would act out and show his discomfort in a very hostile way rather than in a... I dunno. "people pleasing" or avoidant way. He is still afraid, he is still suicidal and lonely and sad, but showing his 'weaknesses' is not an option. If people find out, they'll have the upper hand on him. They'll try to fuck with him. The solution is to use threatening and hostile words and body language. To make himself unfuckable. In his own mind at least.
So, he's not trusting. Not that it matters because he doesn't have a desire to make friends. Not in any real way. He wants people around, but his idea of the perfect buddy isn't anything achievable, because a person can't be there when you need them and then dissipate in to thin air as soon as their presence gets annoying- and not only that, but they gotta be cool with getting ghosted whenever Dude feels like ghosting them, only for him to return like nothing happened.
But this is really only the tip of the 'Dude acts like a loser creep toward the general public' iceberg. His social skills are shot, both from neglect throughout his life and his general unwellness, and that makes talking to him pretty stressful. He's always ready and willing to stroke his own ego, and he will do so in both lighthearted and underhanded ways. From poking fun, to outright humiliating people.
I do think, though, that with his type of fears n such, and the way his biggest issues seem to stem from misanthropy, that he would be able to read people very well. Not only that, but he also has charisma that everything else 'wrong' about him coasts along on. People tolerate him in their presence because from the outside he seems very confident and sure of himself and he's funny (if you like his weird and often depressingly gruesome humor).
When the schizophrenia hits fully sometime in his early 20's, that's when his personality takes a shift. His depression worsens and his distrust of people grows into a wholehearted belief that people want to hurt him and will do so if given the chance. Good people stop existing, anyone who tries to help him has an agenda. His hostile nature gets worse, his ability to be charming or even just seem normal dissipates. People can see it, they look at him differently, they avoid him before ever speaking to him. Even where there are no threats he sees them and eventually he's subject to total self-imposed social isolation.
The social isolation aspect is important. This is where he comes to the conclusion he has nothing left to lose. He becomes so detached that he stops being able to relate to his own species. People and human life stop having meaning because he's started believing he isn't part of the group. They might as well be cows. Complete detachment.
There's nuance to this as well, of course. Not everyone who has schizophrenic delusions or goes into social isolation is bound to decide killing everyone around them is a good idea. So... What makes Dude different? A lot of things, I'd assume. A lot of bullshit. Probably a shitty upbringing, one that taught him to be violent and to emotionally detach. But I'd have to write for days to explain what I think his childhood was like or whatever. This is already so fuckin long.
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valley-of-headcanons · 4 months
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I just stumbled across your blog and I really love your headcanons! If you had the time, I was wondering if you could do the bachelors reacting to a mute farmer?
bachelors with a mute!farmer || headcanons
being mute isn't as hard when you have these considerate men around <3
warning: this is under the assumption that the reader cannot speak at all! all include sign language as a form of communication :) other warnings are that certain townies are VERY SLIGHTLY ableist (jodi, george). take this whole story with a grain of salt, as i am not mute! i tried my hardest, however, please let me know if something is wrong/offensive/just straight up stupid! i'd love to learn where i went wrong :)
requested by: anon, thank you so much for requesting! and i deeply apologize for the fact that this took around a year to come out ... oopsie daisy ... my stardew valley hyperfixation went bye bye but guess who's backkkk?? anyway! here you go, better late than never :)
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alex
• Alex honestly had no idea what to do when he realized that you were mute. He had no idea what to do, and you saw it on his face. He wanted to interact with you, you looked pretty interesting, but ... he had no idea where to start. So, you offered to teach him sign. He was surprised to see that you had that much faith in him, and he rejected initially, but ... he really wanted to have a new friend. It seemed like you were a genuine person, and he needed that in his life. So he did.
• You taught him sign, and this was probably one of the hardest things he's done. He believes he's not very bright, so he's incredibly nervous. But he works so hard for you! He didn't really know why he did, as you were just a new neighbor. Maybe you could be more? You could be a true friend! That's what he's looking forward to the most.
• As he began getting fluent and he learned more about you, the more he enjoyed being around you. Someone actively took a chance on him, and he's forever grateful. He opened up a lot to you, and you reassured him through all of it. He was the smartest person you knew because of how well he picked up sign ... he cried a little bit, although he really doesn't want to admit that.
• He realized how close you've gotten, and how his feelings haven't stopped growing for you. So, he had to do something about it! A soft, well-candlelit dinner was prepared for you, and he asked you out fully through sign! He had worked so hard on preparing a fully thought-out speech through sign for you ... it was so incredibly sweet. He really does love you.
• Alex was incredibly defensive of you, and would probably fight anyone who tried him. He even had several arguments with George. He wasn't the most supportive and definitely had some comments, especially since he literally couldn't see the sign ... but through Alex, he was convinced. Everything was fine, especially with Alex doing his best to convince those around him.
• Overall, Alex loves you and it shows. It shows through every piece of sign that he learns, every action that he does for you, and everything that he says to you and others. He adores every aspect of you, and he loves your bravery and your amazing soul. He can't get enough of you.
elliot
• Elliot is definitely a romantic, and when you didn't respond to his minor flirting, he was very confused. But when he realized you were mute, he dramatically gasped and apologized, basically dropping to his knees. He felt horrible, and promised to make it up to you.
• For a while, you talked back and forth through letters, since he was often stuck at home writing. He finds that he can write a lot more through his letters to you than he can his own book. Isn't that strange? He brings it up to you in one of his letters, and he eventually invites you over to his cabin. He bounces ideas for his book off of you, and strangely, it's so much easier to communicate with you ... how strange.
• He ends up learning sign for you in his free time, although it takes a while due to his busy schedule. He still prefers to write letters to you, it seems much more personal and definitely more romantic. He eloquently writes about his life and inquires you about yours.
• Elliot realizes that maybe this situation isn't just romantic to be romantic ... maybe there were feelings underneath, feelings that Elliot had never truly felt before. He ended up writing poetry about you, pages and pages. He can't get you out of his head! He had to let you know. You found out through a book of poetry sitting in your mailbox, and after reading through it, it was undeniable that it was about you. He was infatuated ... and so were you.
• He's incredibly protective of you, making sure to keep you out of harm's way as much as possible. If anyone were to say so much as one hateful word to you, he'd make a scene. With his dramatic flare, he'd declare them an imbecile and swoop you away to a safe place. It's in his nature, did you think anything less?
• Elliot'e romantic side has never been greater than with you. Romance and genuine feelings have always been apart in his mind, but they've both culminated in a beautiful love with you. He doesn't mind your muteness, he finds it beautiful and inspiring. You're his muse, of course.
harvey
• Harvey is incredibly understanding, and he tried his best to understand you as much as possible! He has no problem learning how to communicate with you and how to help you out as much as possible! He's the most understanding of your condition, and asks many questions about how and why you're this way. Not in a hateful way or anything, he just wants to understand you fully!
• As your doctor, he's definitely concerned for your health at first, but his nerves are calmed eventually. He slowly works toward getting to know you despite your condition, and he loosens up a little bit. He's so sweet and kind toward you, and he can't believe he's befriended someone as lovely as you.
• He opens up about his color blindness soon enough, and how debilitating it can seem. You bond over that, and he finds it easy to open up to you. He's used to being the listener, it's literally his profession, but it's nice to be listened to for once.
• Harvey realized this was a lot more than just a friendship, due to his heart racing when he's around you ... wow. He didn't expect this, and he really doesn't know how to act on it. But as you two hang out on the pier of the beach one night, he can't help but admire you instead of the stars. You notice, and he can't hide it anymore. He asks so nervously if you feel the same way he does. You answer with a gentle kiss on his cheek. He melts.
• He is very defensive of your condition, if someone says anything slightly derogatory, he will go off on a medical tangent. He justifies everything with an array of medical terms, enough to put anyone at a loss for words. Once Harvey silences the other person, he apologizes heavily, but still defends his love.
• Harvey loves you, and it shows through his concern for you and his deep affection for you. You're such an amazing and brave person, and he admires every bit of it. He admires you more than anything, and he would reshape the world if it meant to keep you safe.
sam
• Sam, despite his loud and energized nature, doesn't mind the fact that you're mute! He finds interacting with you regulating, in some kind of way. He has to calm down a bit to concentrate on communicating effectively with you. He enjoys talking to someone who has such a different viewpoint on life!
• Sam actually knew sign language before he met you! While in the war, Kent had sent a letter home that he had gone have deaf due to the constant noise of the war. Jodi then forced her family to learn sign language as soon as possible, so communicating with him was incredibly easy!
• Being able to actually use his sign language is actually pretty fun! He's very fluent, and he enjoys seeing your personality through your sign. He also enjoys your personality in general, how you overcome not speaking and your bravery. He finds that you both enjoy music, and it's a major bonding point between the two of you.
• Showing each other different songs that you enjoy was a staple of your hangout sessions. He finds those evenings the ones that he looks forward to the most, watching you smile and bop your head to the music. It's soft, it's sweet, it's ... lovely. As his feelings approach him, he can't get you out of his head ... his writer's block comes to an end. Eventually, he ends up playing a song for you. The love that he has for you is evident through the lyrics. And then ... a soft kiss as the song goes on, you would probably scream in joy if you could.
• His mom is ... not the most fond of you being mute. He doesn't really care, as he mostly just ignores her. He loves her but good god, her views ... so, he chooses your friendship more than anything. And when you two travel to something more, he chooses that over the relationship with his mother. She has a few passive aggressive comments, but she eventually gets over it enough to only give you a few side-eyes.
• Despite every hardship, Sam loves you. Every aspect of you is perfect in his eyes, and he wouldn't change anything about you. Sam adores your wonderful personality, despite not ever really hearing a voice behind your wonderful words. He doesn't care, you're you, and that's what matters.
sebastian
• Sebastian is the most quiet of all of the bachelors, so it makes sense that he would be naturally drawn to someone with a similar vibe. He doesn't mind the fact that you don't speak, and he finds ways to adjust.
• At first, he doesn't put too much effort into learning sign language to communicate. He doesn't see the reason why, you're just another person in town. But after Sam started speaking to you through sign language and you crossed paths more ... he decided to, why not?
• After talking to you, he realized that you have a lot in common. This makes him excited to finally have someone to relate to, and more and more, he asks you to hang out. Most of the time you end up doing things together in silence, but when you do talk, it's deep and personal.
• Falling for you was not his intention and came out of absolutely no where. He thought he was destined to spend the rest of his life shrouded in darkness, but this one quiet beam of light pulled him out of that. Huh. How odd. It took a lot of mutual pining for this to come to the surface, however. You called out that he accidentally used the sign for “I love you” when saying goodbye ... his pale face went bright red. Safe to say, you didn't say goodbye that evening. A long talk and a kiss goodnight, you two ended up together. As you should be.
• He doesn't really give the time of day to the people who don't understand you. A deep side eye and an aggressive sigh usually escape him, but he tells you not to worry about it. He shows you that he loves you no matter what, and “people fucking suck.”
• Sebastian relates heavily to you, and really loves you. He can't believe he's found someone who relates to him so well, but also has such a kind and genuine soul. He loves you more than life itself and enjoys your company more than anything on this planet.
shane
• Shane is probably the most guarded person in Stardew Valley, and it shows when he meets you. He could care less about you at first, pretty much ignoring your every movement. He doesn't really care that you're mute, he just doesn't care about you period. He's not really there yet, mentally.
• However, things change when you offer him a beer. He's confused by your kindness, and you can't really explain yourself because he doesn't understand sign. His curiosity is piqued. So, he asks Marnie if she knows any sign, and she refers him to Jodi, who eventually refers him to Sam. He hates the idea of having to work with Sam, but he can't help himself. He was too curious.
• After picking up a bit, he ends up offering you a beer in solidarity. He then thinks for a moment before showing the sign for beer. Your excitement warms his rather cold heart ... that's new. He just communicates by speaking, but he can read sign, so that seems like enough in his eyes.
• He finds it easy to talk to you, as you're such an interesting and perseverant person. It inspires him to begin working on himself. He pushes himself to work hard ... for you. Huh. Then, as if the sky was falling around him, he realized he was falling for you. He began pushing you away, until you basically cornered him at the bar. You took him to a private room where he rambled on about how perfect you were and how he was just going to ruin you. You eventually just signed “love ?” He looked like a scared child and just nodded. He signed “I love you” with shaking hands. But of course, so did you.
• His assholery is on full display when someone tries to come at you. He doesn't do it as eloquently or kind as some others, he just curses and insults until they shut their trap. They have no room to talk in his eyes.
• Despite his cold nature, Shane really does love you. He has no problems with your nature and sees it as a contrast to his own nature. He finds that enamoring and beautiful, unlike himself. He's working on himself, for you.
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bnhaobservation · 3 months
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My two cents about chap 426
Hum... maybe I should call this my SIX cents about chap 426 because I'm gonna look at that chapter from three different perspectives.
The first is the Doylist one, in which I'll try to discuss what I think Horikoshi meant with what he represented in the chapter. I'm not Japanese and I might be wrong so take everything with a grain of salt.
The second is the Watsonian one, in which I'll focus on the story itself.
The third... is watching the chapter not keeping into consideration the chapter as a story filled with Japanese culture aimed at Japanese readers but as if it were a story that follows my culture and is aimed at me. This third analysis is here because there's actually a huge cultural clash between how many scenes would look to a Japanese audience and how they look to a person of my culture.
It's food for thoughts about how different cultures can see the same things differently and, while I'm a western, this doesn't mean I expect allt he western to feel the same as there are plenty of countries in the west and while they've similar views... they still can be different among them so it's fine if other westerns would read the chapter in an even different way.
Also this is not meant to be a compaint at Horikoshi or a critic to Japanese culture, just an acknowledgement different cultures see things differently.
Of course you can choose to skip to read one of those three parts if it doesn't interest you.
It's up to you.
Said so let's start.
Doylist commentary: So I’ve already discussed in a previous post how normally, the general attitude of a family would be to dump Touya to his own devices… so, as to prove the Todoroki instead are there to see Touya because they care about him, we’ve the opening discussion in which it’s clearly said not only they are all there but also that they aren’t there merely for a sense of duty. It’s Horikoshi’s roundabout way to say the family CARES.
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By the way Fuyumi, Rei and Natsuo got a haircut. While it's obviously due to the hair burning cutting off hair in ancient Asia (Japan, china, Korea & possibly some other Asian cultures) used to symbolize being banished or rejected from their home (which fits with how the family is kind of a social pariah) but currently, cutting long hair into a short cut means to forget the past, leaving the old and starting anew (which might fit with how the family is starting a new life).
So I think Horikoshi also kept this into consideration when he had them cut hair.
We aren’t told where they are but it’s probably either a Villain hospital (they got mentioned in the Overhaul arc)...
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...or just a prison as the guy in the room is dressed in a way that’s similar to the guards that were in Tartarus.
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Touya is in a medical contraption which looks like a coffin as the guard explain he’s slowly dying.
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He looks terrible, Horikoshi even got rid of his hair, which Touya had instead kept through the whole battle. He looks so bad (there are even nails that, I guess, hold still his head and what seems to be mechanical contraptions  around his jaw and neck, never mentioning the restrains that hold his body still… though we can’t see anymore the cables that were visible in the previous chapter… guess Horikoshi retconned his previous design…) some readers have compared him to a Cenobite. For who has no idea what a Cenobite is, they’re characters from the Horror movie “Hellraiser”, extra-dimensional beings who are mutilated and brainwashed into torturing humans for all eternity. Likely the visual look is to sweeten the pill that Touya is meant to die. In such a state it will seem cruel to keep him alive.
The announcement Touya is about to die is likely meant for the readers, not for the family, as they probably already know, hence not only there’s no reaction from them but this is also meant to be Horikoshi’s attempt to clue the readers in the fact we’ve to let Touya die.
His family has no hope he’ll survive and it’s doing nothing in this sense which is also a way to tell us we’re meant to deal with it... and Horikoshi likely chose this as this is the most ergonomic solution for Touya's ending.
Japan has death penalty, and fighting so that Touya would survive, only to sentence him to death for his crimes afterward, would be counterproductive for the story as it would only stretch it and make it sadder.
I’m pretty sure Horikoshi thinks letting Touya die on his own is a good compromise.
The following talk between Touya and Enji is a mean to conclude both Enji and Touya’s arcs.
The remark that Enji always meant to retire is here to tell us it’s not just because he can’t fight anymore, so he’s forced to. You might remember Enji himself said ‘Endeavor’ died back when he woke up in the hospital at the end of the first war.
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The fact Horikoshi also had Enji’s body being basically destroyed (along with Fuyumi and Rei getting scarred) is part to show the consequences of their mistakes, part to symbolically have the family also share what Touya went through (when he burned himself over and over).
We’ve a lot of close up on eyes, to go back with the theme of looking, of how Touya only wanted for his father to look at him and how he’s been looking at him the entire time.
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There’s another visual good reason why Enji is on a wheelchair.
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When Enji says he’ll come to talk with Touya, Horikoshi represents Touya as standing, dressed as Dabi and with the scars Dabi had prior to his reveal but with Touya’s hairstyle. Visually it’s to tell us both identities have merged. Touya isn’t dead… but he’s no more just Touya, Dabi is part of who he is. His arm is missing but HE IS STANDING, he’s not trapped in that contraption. Enji is also represented without bandages or burns… but he’s still seated on a wheelchair. This forces him to look up at his son, while Touya looks down at him. Even though now Enji isn’t saying sorry, his words and the visual imply this is also an apology to Touya, even if Enji already said to him he was sorry after the end of the fight.
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This is BIG in Japan so in this way Horikoshi makes the scene more emotional.
Now… previously Touya didn’t want to talk, he wanted to be seen by Enji. His catchphrase was ‘look’ not ‘hear’ (as this chap itself remind us).
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He was desperate to show his father what he can do. In chap 390, moments before Shouto saved the day, Horikoshi introduced the idea he wanted to talk with his family.
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It wasn’t a bad idea, first of all because now he’s not in the state to show much, so either Horikoshi were to kill him short after he almost blew up Japan, or they wouldn’t have much to watch now. Introducing the idea he wanted to talk as a way to ‘translate’ his ‘I want to be seen’ gives them something to do with the additional time they’ve with him and could be considered foreshadowed by the times Touya tried to talk with his family and they didn’t really listen to him. So the idea that seeing him could also be done by talking with him works.
It’s also an extra attempt to make clear to the readers Touya’s soul will be soothed/saved even if he’s going to die (I’ve discussed how this might be important for Japanese readers while it often falls flat to western readers in another post).
Horikoshi also kind of give closure to the Touya/Shouto narrative. By giving them the same favorite food he draws a connection between the two siblings.
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The reminding of their fight isn’t just here to remind us of how the battle. What Touya said before that bit was they shared the same blood but were really different. Now instead he’s shown Shouto has something in common with him, something good and nice like a shared taste for a certain food. This denies Touya’s words that they run in parallel but forever apart and with Touya apologizing to Shouto, in a single blow Horikoshi ends the feud between the two siblings as well as giving Touya the chance to do what he wanted to do when he woke up in the orphanage, apologizing.
It can also be that this little exchange was something Horikoshi long planned, as for a long time he had kept Touya’s tastes hidden in his profile so that he could reveal it here.
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I know there had been wondering if Touya’s tears are real (hence either his tear ducts regenerated or he lied previously) or bloody or something else. I think the whole point of it according to Horikoshi is that Touya, who used to cry a lot as a kid (and whose tears eventually almost killed him as the fire at Sekoto Peak started from them)...
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...then became unable to cry.
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Touya was (almost) killed by his own pain and desperation and once he was forced to not show it... well, this also lead him to become a Villain.
The message was not that he wasn’t suffering anymore, but that he couldn’t express it anymore (which is not a good thing)… with Horikoshi going for alternative ways to show him being in pain (his losing blood the hair die dripping  from his eyes and so on) that you would notice only if you were paying attention, in short ‘looking at him’.
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Now Touya is being looked at and can express his pain as well, though this time is a bittersweet one.
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So I don’t think the idea is we should ask ourselves how he can cry, and if it was a lie he couldn’t, but just enjoy the message.
It’s bloody tears? Is he magically able to shed tears again? Or it’s just a symbolic scene? Repeat the MST3K Mantra and just enjoy the fact he’s finally capable to express his pain and WHY because it’s hugely unlikely we’ll get an answer on the why (though maybe the anime might show if they’re bloody tears or not).
Horikoshi gives less space to the closure of the Rei/Touya and Fuyumi/Touya narrative, just having them tell him they want to talk with him.
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I think Horikoshi considered the Rei/Touya narrative closed when he had Rei apologize to Touya. Yes, Touya said he wanted to also apologize to his mom, but I think the idea is that Touya’s apology to Shouto is meant to work as a reminder Touya wanted to apologize so Horikoshi doesn’t feel the need to show us that scene.
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As for the Touya/Fuyumi narrative… Horikoshi hardly paid it any attention. The only interaction we see between the two of them prior to disaster striking has a 3 years old Fuyumi telling him she doesn’t want him to get hurt, which lead Touya to claim she doesn’t understand. When Fuyumi shows up on the battle ground she fundamentally say something similar by claiming she can’t bear to lose anyone else.
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However Horikoshi might have meant for the closure not be her words but her actions. Fuyumi accepts to get burned in order to try to save her family parallels how Touya got himself burned to try to get his father to see him, they both burned because they couldn't bear the pain of not doing anything.
Long story short the reason why Horikoshi hardly give space to Rei and Fuyumi might be that he thinks he had closed their narratives with Touya already.
If, Enji, Rei, Fuyumi and Shouto were all the Todoroki family members I’ll say that the story of the Todoroki family has definitely ended with this chapter. Don’t take me wrong, there’s plenty of things I would wish to see them do and say with Touya, but Horikoshi might feel he had them say all that truly mattered and leave the rest to the readers’ imagination.
However… there’s still the matter of Natsuo.
This chapter mostly seems to close the Enji/Natsuo narrative, but not the Touya/Natsuo one.
In fact it’s noteworthy how through the discussion the only one who said nothing to Touya and tried not to look at him is Natsuo...
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and the only moment Natsuo is shown looking is the moment Touya close his eyes.
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There’s basically zero interaction between the two of them.
Now… I don’t blame Natsuo for failing to help his brother when he was solely a child of 8… but the story did. The interaction we were shown had Natsuo dismiss an already crying Touya, causing him further grief. In two chapters (302 & 388) Horikoshi has Natsuo thinks if he has talked to Touya or heard him out it would have made a difference.
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Now though, Horikoshi leaves him silent.
There’s more.
I know there’s plenty of people who is cheering on the idea Natsuo won’t meet Enji anymore, which seems also how Horikoshi closes the Enji/Natsuo narrative … but this however indirectly means Natsuo won’t meet Touya anymore. Touya can speak with people only few minutes per day and Enji will be there all the days. This means there’s no time for Natsuo to meet his brother outside of the time his father will also be there.
Either the closure to the Touya/Natsuo narrative is that the two will never meet again (so they won’t have a chance to talk again and reconcile) or we’ll get another interaction between Touya and Natsuo.
Since Horikoshi raised a point previously that implied the importance of Touya and Natsuo talking, to me it feels a bit weird he would decide to go this way.
Let me be clear again, this is not about denying Natsuo the possibility to decide he’s furious with his brother and doesn’t want to see him anymore. This is about Horikoshi tossing in previously the idea it would have been important for Natsuo to talk with Touya and him regretting not doing and… then having him not do it again. While it’s a legitimate choice for Natsuo to make, in terms of story writing is kind of an odd choice… especially because Natsuo’s words seem to imply he’s trying to leave the past behind (even the visual places him ahead, in front of his family which is behind him)…
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...which again, fair choice, but there was a whole narrative in the story about how the past doesn’t die so I’m not sure why Horikoshi would want instead let Natsuo go this way.
So I think it’s possible we’ll get another Touya/Natsuo interaction… which might include a Todoroki family/Natsuo interaction as well. Maybe Natsuo will bring his girlfriend to meet Touya. It would make a good chance for her to be introduced to us readers as well before the end as so far we only caught a glimpse of her.
On another note Horikoshi apparently has this chapter ends the narrative of Enji’s atonement.
No, it doesn’t mean Enji has finished atoning, just that he has find his way to atone.
Enji is taking responsibility for how his actions caused what Touya did (taking responsibility was something he refused to do before) and now he’ll spend his life protecting his family. It’s a compromise of the narrative Heroes hurt their family to save others. Enji is trying to do both so this narrative is also in a way closed by having a Hero who tries to do both.
Natsuo says responsibility has been taken and punishment dished out…
‘........ Shōjiki sekinin wa hatashita to omou batsu mo uketa to omou… mō ī nja ne ̄ no?’
「........正直責任は果たしたと思う 罰も受けたと思う…もういいんじゃねーの?」
“...Honestly, I think responsibilities have been taken and punishment has been received... isn't it enough now?”
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…Enji continues to say he’ll keep on taking responsibility and try to protect his family (and therefore their future). This was what he had assumed was the duty of the Number 1 when he had talked with All Might so that discussion comes to a full circle as well. He faced Touya (aka accepted to dance with him in hell) and will keep on protecting the future of the people and his children by trying to protect them by the scandal/sparks/fiery fallout.
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What’s the scandal/sparks/fiery fallout?
Many wanted Enji to be legally punished for the abuse he forced his family to undergo… but that’s not something Japanese society really cares, that’s viewed more like a personal family matter between all the Todorokis… and none of the Todorokis is asking for legal compensation that’s why Horikoshi won’t have Enji be put under trial.
What society blames THE WHOLE TODOROKI FAMILY for (yes, even Shouto even though he hardly had a part in this) is being the family that gave birth to Dabi who was among the ones who went at war with the current society (again, I’ve talked about it in a past post). It’s legally not a crime to have a child who became a criminal… but Japanese society will give you hell for it, hence Enji wants to protect his children from this and take the whole blame on himself.
Horikoshi likely means for THIS to be punishment for Enji’s mistakes (along with the death of ‘Endeavor’ and the damage his body suffered). As Natsuo said THIS WILL BE HELL (at least in theory) so it’s not like Enji is supposedly getting off lightly.
However a foreign reader might miss it because we don’t really get to see the ‘hell’ part. Shouto is in class A who’ll protect him (normally they won’t, Shouto would be ostracized at best, bullied and forced to leave school at worst), Natsuo’s girlfriend is still willing to marry him (normally she would dump him), Fuyumi had to leave her job but she was immediately helped find another one (normally her chances to be hired by people who were to know who she is would be 0) while all of Enji’s sidekicks and Kurumada are there to support him (normally they wouldn’t want to support him) and Hawks is there to support him too (and the story forgot about how Hawks too was involved in a scandal as the fact Hawks is the son of a criminal is a big deal too, even if Hawks’ situation is better than the Todoroki’s). The hell part is a given for Japanese readers so Horikoshi doesn’t feel the need to show it but he shows only that it won’t be only misery.
There’s also something else here. By remarking how things will be fine for the Todorokis because they’ve people supporting them, Horikoshi clearly means to underline the importance of having people supporting others. In the story those who had support always managed to handle things in the end no matter how hard they were, so it’s likely this what Horikoshi is stressing.
Two words about Nagant and La Brava and Gentle.
As I’ve said in a past post, contributing to the fight against AFO was going to be the way for Villains to get forgiven for their crimes. It’s a recurring trope in manga and it works in real life too so I’m not surprised Horikoshi presents them as they’re all pardoned.
The only downside I see in this is that by representing Nagant as okay to stay in prison he forgets how he represented Tartarus as a place where violation of the human rights was an okay thing. Yeah, his idea is probably she was moved and placed in a better prison but still, the narrative has kind of washed away how Tartarus was terrible in more than one situation (prisoners like Stains were first shown to be kept tied all the time but when there’s the escape they’re all free and La Brava said being put in jail was beneficial for Gentle).
Horikoshi clearly let everyone cover up how the Commission jailed Nagant for the wrong crime and it’s not presented as something bad. Revealing it is avoided because it would create chaos and distrust again so the story now only place Hawks, a person who means well, in charge of the commission and this is all the insurance the Japanese audience need to know things from now on will go on well.
It’s possible the idea is also Hawks’ narrative has ended. He lost his Quirk which in a way saved him as it was due to it the Commission took him away from his mother but also it was due to it he became the Commission’s lapdog and now he sits at the top of the commission. He’s basically free and can use the Commission’s power to make a better world. As I said it seems Horikoshi cut short the whole scandal part which regarded Hawks to close his narrative in a positive light.
In a way it almost seems there’s a clash in how the Todoroki family narrative involves the scandal being still alive while the Hawks narrative just let it go. In real life society would probably still give Hawks hell because in Japan you’re just not supposed to have a relative who’s a criminal.
In the story though, while the Todoroki family was held accountable for what happened with Touya (Touya was stated to be the Todoroki’s family sin and hence Shouto had to deal with it), Hawks wasn’t hold accountable for what happened with his parents so Horikoshi gave him a free pass thinking his readers wouldn’t mind (just to make clear I DON’T HOLD HAWKS ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE FACT HIS FATHER WAS A CRIMINAL… but Japanese society often thinks differently).
Hawks is even missing the cut Himiko gave him on his cheek as it apparently left no scarring (or Horikoshi forgot it).
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So this might be the last we see of him… unless Horikoshi is going to address him a little more due to the Hawks/Jin/Himiko narrative. Will he be involved in sparing a Villain’s life instead than urging Heroes to kill them or killing them himself? We’ll see. I’m not taking him wanting to get Nagant out of jail as an answer to this as he was supportive of Nagant previously as well. Long story short it’s possible we’ll see more of Hawks but it’s also possible that’s all we need to see.
Lastly, the scene with Shūichi at Central Hospital is clearly meant to imply the next chapter will address his narrative.
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We know Midoriya was meant to bring to him Tomura’s last words. Shōji might drop a visit as well to talk about Heteromorphs and ways to cope about discrimination or he might want to talk about the future of Heteromorphs. On another note, Horikoshi might remember in his world building he has decided who carries more than one Quirk, unless it’s All for One, will have a shorter lifespan (remember Hikage?) so he might be planning to tell us Shūichi, who now has three, will soon die of old age. Killing him too like it was done for Tomura, like it will be done for Touya and, possibly, like it was done for Himiko (unless they saved her) is ergonomic as it spares Horikoshi from telling us  Shūichi  will be jailed and sentenced to death to give us a tamer ‘he accepted 2 Quirks from AFO and now he faces the unavoidable consequences’. Not that it makes me happy but we’ll see.
So here ends how I think Horikoshi wanted us to read this chapter. I’m not Japanese, I might be wrong as I might have missed some cultural clues but I like to hope I was, at least, close enough. I think for Japanese readers it will be an emotional and fulfilling chapters and they’re probably going to enjoy it a lot.
Watsonian commentary:
So as I expected the Todoroki family is gone to see Touya. This seems the first time they see him, but since he seems to be in some sort of Villain hospital it’s possible it took time for them before they were being allowed to see him. That or for a while Touya was in coma or something like that because yes, some of the Todorokis might not have been up to see him immediately after the fight but some others weren’t so bad.
Of course there’s the possibility they preferred to wait for everyone before going there but I prefer to think they either had to wait to be legally allowed or that it was Touya who previously couldn’t see anyone.
Touya is in some sort of contraption… but the most it’s doing is keeping him alive a little longer as we’re told he’s slowly dying. This tube in which he’s put in is more like a coffin than the one in which Tomura was put in and it can be conveniently placed horizontal and vertical. To allow Touya to talk with the others they put him in an horizontal position. It’s worth to mention the room Touya is in seems dark and, anyway, the others can’t be in the same room as him, they see him through a glass.
The family is composed and calm despite being told Touya is about to die, Touya, seeing them there is sarcastic, pointing out he’s not a tourist attraction. He’s keeping distance from them, even though they all came to see him during the war and now, his words point out how he doesn’t seem to believe they came there for him, that if they were to be there it would be because they thought to find some ‘amusement’ in seeing a tourist attraction.
It’s a jab meant to hurt, as they never looked at him before and the little they did previously came too late… but it’s also possibly a hidden plea to point him wrong. Touya wants to be seen.
Enji fundamentally tells him he succeeded in killing ‘Endeavor’ and in having flames that are way hotter than his own.
Touya insists it’s too late, that Enji is playing nice now when it’s all over and that he’s being a coward.
While Enji agrees with him, now he keeps on staring at him and takes responsibility again. Midoriya has said Touya wasn’t Endeavor so Enji couldn’t be blamed for his actions but Enji takes blame for them anyway.
He says something interesting here.
‘Dare ga nanto iou to........ Omae no honō (netsu) wa ore no HELLFLAME da’
「誰が何と言おうと........ おまえの炎(ねつ)は俺の『ヘルフレイム』だ」
“Whatever people try to say… Your flames (read: heat/rage/mania/madness/passion) are my Hellflame.”
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This seems a nice way to also call back how Touya said that the fire inside him was lighted by Enji and wouldn’t go away… as well as a nice tie with how Touya thought he was in hell and invited Enji to join him. Enji’s rage/madness was passed down to Touya, burned inside him and became Touya’s rage/madness. Enji is no more telling him to just forget and move over, he’s accepting Touya couldn’t.
We see Touya’s eyes squeezing a little, even if he’ll hardly talk through this chat and we hardly can see clearly his emotions his eyes tell a story of their own.
Enji acknowledges it’s far too late but promises he’ll spend the rest of the time Touya has talking with him. In short this time he’ll be there for him, he’ll pay him attention. Touya says nothing but his heart speeding up shows he’s affected. Enji encourages the rest of the family to do the same and encourage Touya to tell him whatever he wants, even if he hates him, which is a repeat of what he told him once they managed to stop him. Fuyumi and Rei also say they want to talk with him but Touya closes his eyes.
For once he won’t be looking at his family, though more likely the reason isn’t he doesn’t want to see them but that he’s just keeping his emotions bottled inside.
Natsuo instead says nothing and this is the first time he looks at his brother… though he has an uncertain expression. It seems as if Natsuo hasn’t quite decided what to do with his brother. His last words to Touya were a scolding… but also moved by how Natsuo felt guilty because in the past he didn’t listen Touya.
In the past Natsuo used anger to hide his pain so back then Natsuo probably used it to hide his sense of guilt. In a way he’s similar to Touya and Enji. Now though… he seems uncertain, he probably hadn’t come to term yet with what had happened.
The family is told to leave and return tomorrow. I guess they’ll be allowed free access. Shouto though still wants to ask Touya about his favorite food but, at first, he gets no reply either, Touya’s eyes still close, while Natsuo turns away his face. It’s when the family is about to leave and Touya is lying down in that dark room he finally replies, telling Shouto his favorite food is Soba, which Shouto confirms also being his favorite food.
It’s meaningful Shouto is the only one who got his brother to reply to him in a somewhat normal tone… even though Touya needed to do it once he was kind of hidden by everyone’s sight… or that he did it  when he thought everyone was leaving as if to say he didn’t really want that.
That tiny word is Touya accepting to talk with them peacefully, but, more importantly, with Shouto. His family has tried to reach out for him, and, of all of them, he reacted to Shouto’s question. It’s probably also Touya’s way to make peace with them. He had hated Shouto, he had said he wanted him dead but now… he’s starting from him to talk with his family. And the fact they have in common something, their own favorite food, makes everything even more tragic because those two siblings could have gotten along, they had things in common, if they had been given the chance they could have gotten along and loved each other just fine but… now it’s late and they’ve only a short time left.
Touya cries when he hears Shouto, like him, loves Soba, he’s finally able to see his brother not as someone way too different from him for him to connect to Shouto but as someone likes him and this allows him to apologize to Shouto, even if the visual seems to imply Shouto didn’t hear him as it was done when Shouto was already out of the building… or at least that’s the impression I get from the images.
As said before, apologizing is a BIG DEAL in Japan so this matters a lot more than it would in the west.
Once they’re outside what’s probably some sort of Villain hospital, Natsuo says he’s cutting bridges with Enji and won’t see him anymore. By default, this means he won’t see Touya anymore either, as Touya can get visits only for few minutes at day and Enji promised he’ll go there all the days.
Likely it’s not just for all he said in past chapters when he admitted being angry with Enji and feeling bad when he sees him.
Touya is a criminal and his whole family, but especially Endeavor as he’s a public figure and a Hero, is held accountable for this. Touya has made a video for the purpose to make sure society, who would have already normally blamed his family for Touya’s actions, had even more incentives to blame Enji. As Natsuo himself said, what expects them after what Touya has done is hell. Society will hold them accountable as if they had agreed to what Touya did.
Cutting bridges with Enji (and Touya) is a common way for many criminals’ family members to try to escape the social hell that await them.
You might notice Natsuo said:
‘Kanojo to seki iretai-shiki wa agenai shōkai mo shinai.’
「彼女と籍入れたい式は挙げない紹介もしない」
“I want to enter in the family register with my girlfriend, but we won't have a ceremony or introduce each other (families).”
In Japan all the family households (basically defined as married couples and their unmarried children) have a family register, also known as koseki (戸籍). The words Natsuo uses imply he’s registering himself in a Koseki that already exists, not that he and his girlfriend are starting a new Koseki.
Now, from what I could understand, generally you start a new Koseki when you marry or when you become independent…  Natsuo isn’t married yet and, although he said he doesn’t want to see Enji again, he didn’t make clear if he wants to become economically independent. It would be difficult as people would be unwilling to hire him and he hadn’t finished university yet (Fuyumi had to leave her job and could find another only because someone supported her).
It’s still possible Natsuo wants to ask for his own Koseki but I think part of what Natsuo want to do is to register himself on his girlfriend’s Koseki so as to take her surname.
Changing Koseki and surname will help him distance himself from the Todoroki. Differently from his mother and sister Natsuo has no facial scars marking him. If he manages to sell himself for someone who’s not a Todoroki he might escape hell.
Natsuo then asks Fuyumi what she plans to do as she had to leave her job. I think he wants to know if she has a plan to escape hell too… but while Fuyumi confirms she has lost her job, she says she has found another thanks to a person who helped her and it’s clear Fuyumi doesn’t plan to cut bridges with her family or Touya. She said she wants to talk with him after all.
Natsuo claims he believes responsibilities have been taken and punishment has been received... asking if this isn't it enough. To Enji it’s not.
He states he’ll be making amends and apologize for his sins for the rest of his life.
‘Okashita tsumi no baishō to shazai o isshō o kakete tsudzukete iku. Mite inakute ī. Kodomo-tachi (read: omae-tachi) ni furikakaru hi no ko o dekiru kagiri ore ga uketomeru, ikinobita imi ga aru to sureba sore dake nanda.’
「犯した罪の賠償と謝罪を一生をかけて続けていく。見ていなくていい。子どもた(おまえたち)ちに降りかかる火の粉をできる限り俺が受け止める、生き延びた意味があるとすればそれだけなんだ。」
“I will continue to make amends and apologize for the sins I committed for the rest of my life. You don't have to watch/look after me. I will take upon me as much of the sparks/damage that will (try to) falls on the children (read: you) as I can, and that's the only meaning of my survival.”
As said before, apologizing is a big deal in Japan and what’s more Enji wants to keep on doing it and making amends and therefore taking responsibility when, previously he had always avoided doing so and pushed responsibility on others. Natsuo remarks again it will be hell but, although Enji agrees with him, he also says he accepted it because he accepted to dance in hell with Touya.
‘Ā DANCE no sasoi o uketande na.’
「ああダンスの誘いを受けたんでな。」
“Yeah, I was invited to the dance.”
He has changed a lot from where he started, to the point even Natsuo, who’s the one sibling who has the lowest opinion of him, acknowledges it.
‘… Hajimeteda yo otō-san no koto kakkoī tte omoeta no.’
「…初めてだよお父さんの事かっこいいって思えたの。」
"...It was the first time I thought my dad was cool."
This sentence from Natsuo means MUCH more than it might seems like as it’s the first time Natsuo refers to Enji as ‘otō-san’ as he previously only used ‘anta’ (“you” in a kind of rude/angry way) or ‘Endeavor’ to talk with him. Now he calls him ‘otō-san’ which you can translate as father/dad, but it’s much more respectful than the ‘oyaji’ Shouto uses.
Basically, even though Natsuo is cutting bridges with him, with this sentence he’s acknowledging Enji as his father for the first time. The first time Natsuo yelled at Enji, Shouto said he wanted to see which kind of father Enji could be. I’ll say the idea is that now he’s the sort of father they can appreciate.
Shouto assures everyone he’ll be fine too as he has the people in class A to support him so he can become the person he wants to be. The Todoroki children leave and we see that Endeavor’s sidekicks as well as Kurumada are there to wait for Enji and Rei. I take that means they’re back together. Enji receives also messages from Hawks, who’s worried for him.
Basically, even though the Todorokis are supposed to be in hell, each of them has people supporting them (Natsuo has his girlfriend, Fuyumi the mother of one of his students, Shouto has class A, Enji and Rei Endeavor’s sidekicks, Kurumada and Hawks) so things will be fine because they’ve people supporting them (in this story who didn’t have people supporting them broke down and ended up a Villain and prey of All for One).
We move to Hawks who’s likely the youngest president of the commission and would like to free Nagant but now, differently from when she escaped, Nagant is all for staying in jail so that she won’t be exploited again. Well, she worked for the Commission and by AFO but… well, the Commission exploited her because they caught her when she was really young… but AFO… he hired her and she said she agreed to work for him because she believed the resulting world would be better. So he used her but I wouldn’t say he exploited her unless the idea is he blackmailed her into agreeing… which it’s possible but wasn’t shown. I’ll be honest, I’m probably losing some sort of clue about Nagant’s narrative post her meeting Midoriya because her actions after meeting him never quite felt that smooth. It’s probably me but, due to this, I’ll leave this part of the story as it is and focus on Shūichi who’s not in a Villain hospital but in Central hospital even though he’s a Villain bedridden and in a poor shape. With three Quirks he might end up dying soon of old age but I don’t know if the story will refresh our mind with this detail.
Shūichi is likely about to meet Midoriya and, possibly, Shōji, maybe with Kōda. I don’t think the ones who followed Shūichi till Central Hospital then changed their mind will drop to say ‘hi’.  I do not look forward to this part. Midoriya had to tell him Tomura’s final words, which, I guess, will be sad and emotional.
As I wasn’t a fan of the Central Hospital arc I do hope it’ll be only Midoriya who’ll visit him because I do not look forward to a retake of that arc. I think that arc is another thing that cause a huge cultural clash but, while this chapter still managed to have good point the Central Hospital arc felt even more distant from me and I’ve no wish to resume it. Still, we’ll see.
A not-Japanese person (aka me) commentary:
I’ll refresh everyone’s mind again. This is a commentary done as if I had not the slightest idea of how Japanese culture works and were reading the story SOLELY through the lenses of my culture… and I’ve to say this is one of the chapters in which the cultural clash is more evident and reading it merely through the lenses of my culture brings me really far from Horikoshi’s intended message.
It’s not here to criticize Horikoshi, it’s just food for thoughts that shows how the same scene can be interpreted very differently according to which lenses you use to look at it. If this is not your cup of tea, just don’t read it.
Now… I’ve said how, in Horikoshi’s intention, the first discussion is meant to show that the family LOVES Touya and that they aren’t there for a sense of duty. To Japanese readers I think it works wonderfully. Ironically, if this were a story placed in my country it would have a different effect. Opposite to Japan in my country is a given they would go to see Touya. All that talking about not having to go there (when it would be normal to) seem to drive home the family thinks NO ONE cares about Touya. Yes, Shouto would then set things straight but you’ll get a really different impression than the one the author intended.
The scene with Touya being held in that tube gets even more horrifying as we often would let inmates who’re about to die go back home so that they can die in their home, with their family, especially if they clearly aren’t in the shape to escape. What’s more the family wouldn’t just leave, as Touya is about to die they would want to remain with him even if he just were to sleep.
The Todoroki family is very composed, very calm, they don’t need to show their pain or their love because in a Japanese mind setting just the fact they’re there and want to talk with him proves it… but since here it would be a given we would need it to be more grief stricken or the family comes out as cold.
We don’t have death sentence. The fact that the family isn’t scrambling to try and find a way to keep Touya alive in such a Quirk world (with Garaki indeed saving him from a similar situation and him surviving for 10 years) again feels as if they don’t care about his survival, as if they thinks it’s more convenient if he dies.
So what for a Japanese audience is meant to work as a way to let Touya go, here gives out a very different vibe… we would have needed Touya to die on the battlefield, before medical aid could be carried to him to accept this.
Touya’s initial mockery, his refusal to talk afterward and his last moments with Shouto instead work here too and are emotional enough.
I wouldn’t expect Enji to face legal punishment for what he did to his family not because we consider it a private family affair but because… he should have faced it ages ago. When little Touya started burning himself at the tender age of 3, the family would be put under scrutiny. They couldn’t let him under vigilance. When Shouto was burned, this would worsen. When Touya would be assumed dead there would be for sure legal consequences. If Enji hadn’t faced it back then, my conclusion would be the BNHA world doesn’t care about all this and won’t lift a finger to protect children (never mentioning the time to make a complaint would be expired). If the idea is that Enji covered things up back then, then the characterization would break down when he would admit things, making it bad writing so yeah, I would just expect the BNHA world to be built to not care to punish such abuse… but the story to criticize it by punishing Enji with his physical disabilities.
Continuing on this… yes, I would be in the camp of ‘just an apology isn’t enough’ because in my country saying ‘sorry’ isn’t that big of a deal as in Japan and wouldn’t even begin to cover it. Combined with how Enji isn’t fighting to save Touya’s life nor improve his condition but he’s saying he’s just willing to talk… it feels he’s doing too little.
Natsuo’s narrative would feel concluded even with Touya. Deciding not to see him nor his father again would feel okay, and since we wouldn’t really hold Touya’s siblings accountable as much as in Japan, Enji’s idea he’ll protect them from the scandal wouldn’t feel like the big deal it is in Japan.
The sidekicks’ narrative would feel... weird. Horikoshi showed them as supportive of Enji in previous chapters because he was a great Hero despite his family situation. There was no real criticism for how he handled his family but in such a setting it could have worked because they were focused on the war. Now that the war has ended the fact they all brush away Enji’s past without having a chance to be critical to it (even if only to say ‘you did terrible but now you’re trying to fix it so okay’) would reinforce the idea of a messed up theme in which for people is okay to abuse people. Yeah, I guess we might fill the blanks assuming they confronted him in a scene we didn’t see because they aren’t really important but it still would feel weird.
The same goes for Hawks, who doesn’t plan to reconcile with his abusive parents but never felt discomfort at how it was Enji’s neglect what caused Touya to do what he did, nor showed sympathy for Touya.
I won’t really dig much into why Japan and my country handle this matter differently, because the difference was established long ago, it’s just that we would have kept on expecting that Hawks’ lack of reaction didn’t mean he was okay but merely that the whole thing was being postponed so it would be confusing when, even now, it wouldn’t be addressed at all, while for the Japanese narrative is clear there’s nothing to address.
Now… remember when I said in Horikoshi’s intentions showing us that the Todorokis will be fine because they’ve support is to remark the importance of support and that he doesn’t show the struggle of the Todoroki being in hell because it’s a given for Japanese readers?
Well, since for my culture it wouldn’t be a given, all that would be seen is the Todorokis not having troubles at all… and their life being made even easier because they got so lucky they accidentally met up with people who would support them. The importance of support gets dimmed by the fact the hardship isn’t really shown much but is supposed to be taken as a given (to be fair we see a little of it, but it’s easy to miss it), and them having support as well just make things seem even easier for them.
Something else worth mentioning about Hawks is that for us the scandal wouldn’t be so much that he was the son of a criminal and hid it, but that he killed Twice… and the press probably even recorded that he said to kill the Twices again. The problem is… here the police is not really allowed to use lethal force (I’ll go for Heroes paralleling the police) unless it’s a life or death situation.
In Japan it’s exceedingly rare the police will use lethal force but… they can do it in the event that a person who is actually in the act of committing, or is suspected on sufficient grounds of having committed, a violent and dangerous crime which is subject to the death penalty or life imprisonment does so much as TRY TO ESCAPE. Bubaigawara was escaping yes, but he was a dangerous criminal and Hawks said he had no choices and so it makes it fine. So basically for Horikoshi this narrative was likely kind of closed with Hawks’ press conference and him apologizing for not managing to find a better way to handle things. It makes it to the news because it’s supposed to be rare… but not because it’s wrong.
Yes, generally the police is investigated if they kill someone but since the police in BNHA was aware of which danger Twice represented it’s no surprise they shrugged it off. And Hawks apologized which, as said before, is a big deal in Japan so to Japanese fans this narrative is, by now, long closed. The same instead wouldn’t work for people of my country.
Nagant’s narrative feels weird to say the least as not only she can’t decide to remain in jail when she’s told she’s allowed to get out but I would expect the situation to be investigated as she ended up in jail for a crime she didn’t commit instead than the one she did. Of course this would means to put the commission under investigation as well instead it seems like all is being hushed which I would totally take for corrupt government. Hawks being a person who means well wouldn’t be reassuring because he’s covering previous crimes.
So that is. This would be my reaction if I were to analyze BNHA from the lenses of my country’s culture. As you can see it would give off a very different vibe because since we’re different for us things would need to go differently to get the same message.
THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT TOWARD THE STORY HORIKOSHI WROTE.
It’s just accepting if Horikoshi makes a story that’s strongly tied to a specific culture (his own Japanese one) people from a different culture who might not be aware of how things work in Japan, will perceive what he says differently. Which is fair, many of us will be handed off the manga without additional cultural notes that help us to understand it the way the author wanted us to understand it. Some stories aren’t meant to work in the same way through all around the world and, as a result, this might cause them to feel ‘bad writing’ in some countries just because the message they want to deliver ends up not being understandable by everyone.
I still think it’s worth to read BNHA even though I just can’t get the same warm feelings Japanese readers get from this ending. I like to think I understand what Horikoshi is trying to deliver (I might be wrong) but it feels more like cold understanding after rationalizing things than an immediate emotional response. It’s very interesting for my curious mind so again I don’t regret in the slightest reading it but… it’s not equally emotionally satisfying. But well, that’s me, if you managed to find it working perfectly well than that’s great!
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Bound SMP Characters Coded as TMA Fears:
(I think @sniffingstarss already did one of these here, so you should go check that post out. But here are my personal thoughts because I have a returned hyperfixation and a new character and I need to get them ouuuut)
Armor: The Flesh
He literally got turned from bird to lizard. Idk what you want from me.
Ashril: (redacted)
Teehee
Ava: The Desolation
Something something traveling to find your long lost sibling figure and doing everything you can to protect them indicates you probably have a really strong fear of losing them… but also I just think Ava should get to burn things, for funsies.
Cosie: The Corruption
I feel like it fits cause of the sickness with her brother and (redacted).
Erin: The Stranger
Not knowing who you are?? Not remembering things you should?? Bestie, the stranger’s got you in a chokehold.
Gaverin: Darkness/the lonely
I think Gaverin’s fears lie at the intersection of the Dark and the Lonely. Being never fully seen, being never fully known, always just a pretty thing who is admired but not heard.
Marcel: The Buried
What’s worse for a guy who likes to travel around than being stuck in one place forever?
Mojave: The Eye
This little guy just wants to hear everyone’s stories and I’m sure that’s all
Pietro: The Slaughter
Okay so Pietro’s is specifically the Slaughter but in the sense of the attacker, not the victim. Just- the fear of being consumed by one’s own nature.
Rune: The Vast
A love of flying?? A fear of falling?? Welcome to the Vast my friend. (Plus it’s funny cause… yk… gay)
Sylph: The Stranger/The Lonely
There’s nothing lonelier than not even knowing who you are or where you came from. (Plus the whole changing last names thing, and the little conversation they had with Vast when the island fell during the race)
Talesin: The Spiral
🧍🫵 Michael Distortion 🌀
Vast: The Hunt/The End
He’s so afraid of turning from hunter to hunted. And he’s so worried that doing so will not only condemn her, but everyone else too.
Virgil: The Eye
Paranoid little motherfu- Heyyyy how’re the conspiracy theories going?
Anyway, these are not canon and absolutely just based on my own silly little observations so please take them with a grain of salt (and fight me about them, I wanna hear y’all’s thoughts).
But yeah!! I’m part of Bound SMP now! I’m so excited to get to share Mojave’s story with you all and I hope you guys will stay tuned for all of the exciting stuff we have in store for ya! 💕💕
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yermes · 4 days
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The world that existed when you were a child is gone and will never exist again 🫐
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Pick a meme
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Disclaimer: please take what I say with a grain of salt and not as the gospel. I just want to share some ideas of practicing and giving advice using the medium as often as I can with school, work, and my own personal studies and practice. But I am working on sharing my notes soon so that will be exciting! Liking and sharing does a lot 🥰
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The cards
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Prince of swords 🪽
21° Capricorn-20° Aquarius, Air of Yetzirah, Tiphareth
The nostalgia of your past, the past, what made you who you are today inspires every waking moment even if it no longer is and perhaps never was. Our perceptions of things are so powerful. What inspired you as a child has driven you to where you are today. Thank that inner child.
The Sun ☀️ 
Sun, Hod - Yesod, fire
Things are fluid. Just live in the joyous moment of now because with nothing ever being stagnant means you may enjoy every waking moment. Enjoy the change. Enjoy the new life. Enjoy what gives in every single moment and the moments that gives and gives while we live is the whole reason it is called the present. Do not stay complacent though. Use this energy to grow.
Lust 🍷
Leo, Chesed-Geburah, fire
The fire and passion of the past may burn up and eat you whole. Enjoy life, do not drown in the allure of the past. The sexiness of what was can overshadow the hope of what could be. When you wallow in what has happened you no longer focus on what’s happening. Be present in the moment
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Im nervous for the upcoming term
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farshootergotme · 17 days
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Oh you and your friend make some interesting points about why Bruce adopting Dick so late in his life was a problem. It’s something writers clearly didn’t take into account when the trying to make this scene work while also not letting go of the not being adopted thing plot line while also trying to have their cake too by having Dick and Bruce makeup and finally having Dick be adopted by Bruce.
I know the writer writing Protugal wanted it to be a touching moment between the two of them. But the problem is it isn’t about what Dick wants and it written in a way where Bruce while has good intention offering him the adoption papers, he doesn’t own up to the fact he caused this issue in the first place if I am remembering correctly although I will have double check and reread that scene so take my statement with a grain of salt. Poor communication is truly the worst emery of them all and cough comic book writers loving to hammer in unnecessary drama and conflict even if makes no bloody sense at times or take into account how it effect the characters going forward. 
The thing about what is a good Batman writer is not necessarily if they nail Bruce Wayne and Batman as a whole but rather if they care about Robin as a concept or even like characters Dick Grayson in general. Same goes to Nightwing writers as well you can absolutely love Dick Grayson but do you actually understand Bruce Wayne as a character and are you willing to explore that aspect of their relationship Ie father/son. (Then again some of Nightwing writers do him so bloody dirty it’s honestly mind boggling to me.)
Another thing to think about is how most modern day writers and even some of older best writers from back in day of Batman is that they refuse to let him be wrong or admit he has messed up. Like my god, I like Bruce as character I really do but it’s so frustrating to see how he is treated in modern books like my god just stop the drama already with his family, I’m tired of Batman being regressed to his younger less mature self mentality and acts like he has learned nothing. Why is it so hard to just let him be a flawed but well meaning dad who yes messes up sometimes but is willing to get better and grow as a person because at the end of the day he truly cares about his children.
My problem with Richard getting adopted as an adult is well mainly with how it was handled. It never about what Dick wants if it was the writers would have made Bruce apologise for his failing as a father to him and make it so it’s up to Richard if he decides to forgive him or not because let’s be honest Bruce hurt his eldest son by his selfish actions but Bruce should also just be honest with him about he has always seen him as a son maybe not at first but it grew into that overtime and that he was wrong for assuming how Dick felt about being adopted and should have done sooner in fact he should have done around the same time as Jason. Again he should have done the minute or at least offered it when he and Dick had a heart to heart in the Marv wolf man run at Donna wedding but I don’t know. You know what amusing about his run is before this story was made he refer to Dick as Bruce adopted child early in his run which is an interesting thing to think about or maybe I misremember and it was a different writer altogether. OvO’)
Or maybe we can just skip all the stupid drama of adopting or no adopting bs and just have Bruce adopt Richard as a young teen which gives Dick enough time to think about it and probably change his mind. It also gives them time to bond as father and son, now I am not asking for Bruce to be a perfect father figure mistakes will happen as he learns what it means to be a father figure to Dick. Like come on give me fun and compassionate Batman please I miss him like geez why are the writers afraid to just let Bruce grow and move on from his past to some extent. 
Another to get off my chest with DC is well isn’t time to just retire the whole ward thing because it not really used anymore and might as well change to Dick being a foster child because that is what he is. Like the 2004 cartoon The Batman made this change to just that. Like I get Ward is historically important to Richard but I don’t know. Another thing I wish for is just to let Dick be adopted earlier at this point because the drama of not being adopted is just hurting both Dick and Bruce as characters at this point. 
When you could instead be focusing on why Dick wanting space and independence from Bruce like how his parenting style can be quite old fashioned the strict yet overprotective father figure and how he shows his love through his actions rather then his words. You could also explore how Bruce being a dad with a mental health issue aka ptsd, being kind of a control freak and suffer from self loathing issues and how he thinks he never be a good enough parent to his adopted soon. Effects Dick development and how Dick felt like over-coddled and suppressed by Bruce being overprotective and at times being super critical of his decisions as a young teen and young adult.
Honestly what frustrating about Tom Tyler run of Nightwing is that the scene with Dick and Bruce in the bat cave is so good but the problem is it is not earned because Tom Tyler hasn’t really taken the time to explore Dick’s and Bruce’s relationship as father and son or having the balls to actually explore the nuances of it and gasp let Dick call Bruce out on where he has hurt him and that Bruce needing to take responsibility for his actions as father. 
This is why I hate when people say they aren’t father and son or god damn family because one it makes it out Bruce actions aren’t as bad because they’re just “coworkers/partners” which just gross to me and also takes away Richard agency and why he repels so heavily against Bruce and why he is so upset about not being adopted you can’t just sit there and tell me they’re not family because it’s simply not true because this effects Richard heavily because in his mind he thought he wasn’t good enough to be Bruce’s son and felt replaced. Literally Eldest feeling replaced by the new baby sibling coded right there.
Another thing, I feel people will have come and accept about superhero comics mostly by Marvel and DC is well they’re kinda like fairy tales in a way, writers giving their own spin and takes on the world and the characters that function within it. They only things that keep them connected is how characters themselves and if they develop and grows carries over or sticks within that part of the lore. I also feel that writers are afraid to take big risks like changing how Dick Grayson became Nightwing even though they’re already one or two versions where it doesn’t lead to him fighting with Bruce and getting fired.
Now I am not saying ignore canon completely but I feel you’re at the mercy of the writers or eras of comic book runs and I think people should pick the writers they like rather try to stitch all these different takes and continuities together. Then again, I guess it doesn’t help that most media has Batman alone and completely disregard the concept of Robin or his found family in general and that honestly such a shame because Robin aka Dick Grayson is the reason Batman comics stayed alive for so alive for so long, hell he was created even before blooming Alfred.
Which leads to final point this whole thing about Dick Grayson not being adopted, has made so that is all is ever talked about. Who Dick Grayson the character like what are his goals who he is like yes he relationship with his father figure is important as it what lead him to this pathway and wether he likes or not he can quite similar to Bruce in terms of his beliefs and parts of his personality but also what about his friends the titans or his journey into adulthood and he finds himself that’s more interesting to me. Modern writers what are you doing with Richard he has so much potential and yet it feels like they have no idea on what they want to do with. No more Tony Zuuco no more changing to his backstory leave it alone please it’s fine how it is there is no reason to make it more complicated and by doing that you take away how the parallel between Bruce and Dick backstories 👏👏👏Hot take I know. 
Also, there is nothing wrong with wanting to write Dick and Bruce patching up their relationship as father and son, I love Bruce being a good dad that is trying to best despite being mentally ill himself. But keep in mind how you go about writing Bruce and make sure he faces consequences for his decisions and actions as a parental figure to  Dick Grayson and his other children. 
Oh wow sorry for making another kinda essay in your ask box again. 😅 (Hmm, I could talk about how Dick parents and his lifestyle at the circus effect his personality and how his flaws were already there before Bruce took him in but that probably for another time ha ha.
Anyway, that is enough of my rambles and inner never ending thought of this complicated father and son duo.
Hey, thanks for sharing your thoughts! I personally can agree with a lot that you're saying.
The problem when it comes to writing Dick and Bruce is that their characters are so old that many of the things from the earliest comics would be very different if one wants to write them in a more modern era. But many writers seem to choose to keep things (despite also changing things that are actually alright and should be left alone, but, oh, well...)
I mean, I don't think the drama of Bruce not being able to adopt is all that bad. For example, in one of the origins, there was woman, Sister Mary, who took care of Dick during his time at the orphanage. She mentions doubting Bruce's capabilities as a father because of his reputation as a womanizer, but that she was convinced she'd be good for Dick after talking with him in private.
They could still use this conflict in modern era and how his image as the playboy billionaire could influence the jury's decision to only give him custody of Dick as his new guardian rather than his adoptive father. Plus (I don't remember if it was in the same origin or not) Dick at the beginning wasn't fully ready to have a 'replacement' for his dad, so Bruce would respect that and accept the responsibility as his guardian.
However, here's where I'd say that they screw up; they let the years pass, no mention of adoption whatsoever (despite both clearly growing to see each other as father and son, respectively) and they just leave it at that until, check this out! Jason is adopted! I would assume now the jury is okay with letting him adopt a child because he's proven himself by taking care of Dick all these years. But, yeah, actually, back to Dick, what about him, then?
I don't believe for a second nobody would bring up the adoption issues. Like, if not Bruce or Dick (maybe because they're both afraid of being rejected by the other if they bring it up) why not Alfred? He's not shy about voicing his thoughts to Bruce, and I'm sure he could convince him to have a chat with Dick about a possible adoption because Dick is only getting older and one day it'll be too late to ask.
(Except not apparently because DC wrote Bruce asking a Dick in his early twenty's if he can adopt him which is definitely not late at all! Not to mention they had the first real conversation about adoption years ago, but Bruce just ignored Dick clears desires to be adopted and only brought it up when he thought it was the right time because why make a father that cares also about his son's emotions, am I right?
It just feels like a cheap compensation for all the years they (specially Dick) waited to become an official family. So what if the bond is more important? Maybe Dick wanted the reassurance that no matter what he would still be Bruce's family without meaning the end of their relationship everytime he left the manor to make a life for himself, is that so wrong?)
And it just makes Bruce look so bad when someone comes up with the excuse that "Dick didn't want to be adopted so Bruce was only respecting his wishes". Well, of fucking course he didn't want to get a new father a few weeks after he saw his dad's bloody corpse laying on the floor of the circus! But years later? When he's already learnt to deal with the grief and has found a new family in these two older men that chose to take care of him? What excuse does Bruce have then to not have ever brought it up again? The only 'excuse' I could think of is that he was insecure that he wouldn't be a good father to Dick (or as good as Jhon Grayson) or, as I mentioned before, afraid of being rejected. But this isn't just about him!! And as the adult in the situation he needs to save those feelings for later and communicate with Dick first without coming to any assumptions. What will change from the current relationship, anyway? Other than the security that Bruce can't just get rid of Dick whenever he wants since he's just his guardian and he can pass the responsibility to anyone else which sounds a lot more like a plus to me than a negative change.
And Bruce himself said "it doesn't really change anything" when he gave Dick the papers, so it really was a non-issue since the beginning.
I get he can have doubts and insecurities, but when it's between putting your feelings first or the ones of the child you're raising, I think the decision should come pretty easily. (Not to Bruce, apparently)
So, yeah, if DC really wanted, they could just change the early years again (we know they can, they've done it enough times already) and make Dick Bruce's officially adopted son during his Robin years and fix the whole issue very easily.
Now, I wanted to address the part about Bruce's parenting and DC not letting him develop and grow as both a character and a father, but I don't want to make this too long and you already said enough about the topic, so I'll leave it at that.
(also, would definitely love to hear about your thoughts on Dick's upbringing at the circus and how his issues began from his early childhood and not everything was for Bruce's influence. I have my own thoughts about that and it'd be great to discuss them with you)
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twosoulss77 · 6 months
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but you are allowed to have a favourite ship, canon or not, out of a particular show.
Shipping is just a way for artist and what not to explore different dynamics, or even their own. That’s why I believe we should let people enjoy what they like, without forcing our own image of a certain spectrum into them. Especially cause shaming those people, for trying to explore their identity through art, might cause actual harm to them or cause them to not enjoy doing what they like anymore, bc of hateful comments from someone who hides behind a fake identity to hate on a fictional ship, which in itself it’s a very sad and pathetic way to live, but just cause your life is miserable doesn’t mean you need to make others people’s life miserable you know. Go touch Grass when you feel like being a dick!!!
As an AroAce fellow with no desire for a sexual relationship, I applaud and adore all those people making content of my fav husbands, let it be a fics smut or just normal fluff, I love it all SO MUCH Hazbin Hotel ep 5 changed my whole chemistry, and Say what you will about radioapple / appleradio, but I will always be entertained by the idea of Lucifer angrily doing acts of kindness for Alastor because it's what ‘Charlie would want’, and Alastor being a stupid ‘Bambi’ and try to wiggle himself out of it at the beginning, but then realise that he actually doesn’t mind the king of hell company at all. Both slowly growing to actually tolerate and maybe even like being around the other. Exchanging snarky remarks in a more playful way, playing music together, telling dad jokes, hating on the same delusions glorified iPad …like there is so much potential there that it’s crazy how much it pisses people off. It might be cause I am a sucker for Enemies to Friends to Lovers, but by God if that isn’t the best trope.
I know there will be some smart people out there, that are gonna be like “Alastor is ace”, but so are half the people who ship him!!! I hate when people make assumption on us, on who and how we want to love. I might not be interested in participating in sexual stuff myself, but that doesn’t stop me to explore my own ace-spectrum with these two characters, who if they wanted to could and would kiss each other, Cause for one I says so, I have the power to make that happen *insert hysterical laugh* And second It was confirmed that Alastor is a repulsed Ace, but would also be down to date someone if they were strong asf, (Confirmed in a stream, take that with a grain of salt) still makes this ship more possible than others.
Al being Aroace, doesn't mean he can't date or have sex, he's just not all that interested in it, but that could also derive from the fact that he hasn’t found the right person yet, so it doesn’t feel important to him yet. (fun fact aromantic wasn't the part of my struggle accepting that I was aroace it was actually accepting I was ace bc of my hyper sexual tendencies)
Also Alastor being aro just makes radioapple infinitely more funny to me, or any relationship with him for that matter. He is just this 7 feet tall demon with zero interest in romance, but always managing to find himself having beef with someone, possibly a guy, and act like he is either about to kiss or kill him XD
I really needed to get this off my chest and I absolutely mean every thing I said in here. Everyone has their own likes and dislikes, but you'll be surprised to see how much happier you will be when you stop focusing on what other people are doing and instead focus on what you like.
Thanks for listening 😊💜
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changbinsboobs · 17 days
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can u do skz how theyd be during fwb?
*For entertainment purposes only, take with a grain if salt!
How would Skz be in a fwb?
Chan - 2 of Cups
I think he would for sure get a crush on the person😂🥲. And i think it be the fruits of his delulu ass tbh. I think he would just start of as fwb but would play into the bf role way to much and shoot himself in the foot and get a crush.
Lee Know - 9 of Wands
I don't think he's someone that would be open to fwb. And i don't think he thinks well of the whole thing in general so im not getting any further specifics on the matter.
Changbin - 10 of Wands, 5 of Pentacles
I don't think he's one for it either, but contrary to lee know i think he has been open to it and tried it. And the whole experience was very underwhelming for him, he felt empty in the connection so he's found for himself he's not someone to be good in or enjoy fwb. Although if he were in a connection like that he would be very confused on how to act, where the boundaries are like where does friends end and lovers beginn, stuff like that. I think he had difficulties navigating the whole thing and instead of having fun and enjoying himself he stressed himself out much more than the fun he was actually getting, cuz he's not a guy to enjoy sex without feelings so there was little to no fulfillment in it for him.
Hyunjin - 3 of Swords
I can't exactly pick out if he has tried it and got hurt, or if he just has very strong opinions on the matter where he's strongly against it. If my own opinion is asked i think his strong opposition and feelings are because of a personal situation. Maybe he has had a crush he had big feelings for, but they didn't, they were open for fwb tho and for him it wasn't an fwb it was a relationship or at least a chance for one. Like there was hope for something more comming out of it - but it didn't. And so he got heartbroken over the situation, realizing the person didn't love him. Its not necessarily fwbs fault😂 but i think hyunjins someone to blame whatever's at the sight of a negative experience he has had, just because he feels such intense negative emotion that later on he associates with this certain thing and so he doesn't like it cuz if that association his brain makes.
Han - 4 of Wands, 9 of Cups
I think he's someone that would be really good in a dynamic like that and i think he would really enjoy it too. I think he would like the freedom and lack of committment, at the same time he'll have the loyalty and company of a hood friend, without having the responsibilities and pressure a relationship brings with itself. I think he'll really flourish in a dynamic like that - i don't think he knows that about himself tho😅😂. Maybe sometime later in life he'll learn this about himself. Oh also im getting he'll need or enjoy variety.
Felix - Knight if Pentacles, Page of Wands
I think he's curious about that. I don't think he's ever tried it out tbh which shocks me a little😅 but i think if he were in a connection like that he'll be open to a lot if stuff and would rather let himself be led by the other person and just follow along and enjoy the ride if i can say so. An di think he'll learn along the way. He'll be very excitable and open and fun to be around and i think the friends in fwb would be very prominent in a connection with him. Even the steamy parts would feel very friendly i think. Looks very nice, i like the energy a lot☺️ got me intruiged🌝
Seungmin - 7 of Cups
If he were single i think he would have quite a few arrangements. He likes variety, he like having friends he can habe fun with, he's a gentleman and he can organize it all well so that its respectful, friendly, fun, within boundaries and idk, just overall good. I think by now i like his approach/energy regarding the topic the most. Idk what else to say about it😅 its just good. Something that in my opinion is bound to go wrong/get toxic in most cases - he seems to actually be experienced/mature/healthy enough to be able to execute it in a good, balanced manner.
I.N - Knight of Swords, 5 of Swords
I think he runs away from offers/people like that. I don't think he thinks well of the whole thing and i don't think he has or ever will have a desire to try it out as again im seeing he's actively running away from it, removing himself from such opportunities, shutting them down coldly etc. Lee Know for example was milder in his coldness towards the topic.
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A Terribly Organized Almost-Essay About Suzanne Collins and Why I Think She Writes
Lukewarm take because it's been years, but here it goes: if there's anything I've learned over the years, it's that Suzanne Collins is not a people pleaser. (The author, at least. I don't know her personally lol). And she be pleasing the people, that's not what I mean! I just kept hearing the same question being asked over and over again. "Why Snow? Why him?? Why not anybody else? Really?? A prequel about HIM??" It really made me think.
And don't get me wrong! I'd slash someone's tires for a Finnick prequel just like the next person (Suzanne please!), but that has never been the point of her writing. The Hunger Games novels, and by extension, the prequel book The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, aren't just fun fiction reads. Yeah, they're gripping. The world-building is superb. Young people are at the center of it. And all these characteristics are great, but the thing that draws us in, that keeps us consuming her media like hungry little caterpillars, is that they are, time and time again, a captivating and accurate criticism, analysis, and deconstruction of the broken systems society experiences in the real world. I can only speak from my own experience as a Mexican American woman in the United States, so take all of this with a grain of salt.
The Capitol is colorful and fun and interesting and horrible and sadistic. And it is all those things because it is a symbol of our own real-world 1%, except our own glittering Capitol members here in the real world feed us the hope that we may reach their status if we only work hard enough for long enough. The Hunger Games system never makes that claim. In fact, they are fed the narrative that the system only works because they're stuck where they are. Suzanne Collins is taking everything one step further in her writing because it is a type of satire, a critique of the things we already know. So as an author, she blows it out of proportion so that her reader will say "look at this! How ridiculous! How would someone let the system treat them this way!" And it is ridiculous, it's downright laughable that an entire society, an entire country, would let itself be oppressed in such a cruel way by just a few people in charge instead of rising up and- oh wow, yeah, I see it. She wrote about us.
Suzanne Collins just organized everything neatly into boxes- well, districts. Because every district comes with some form of product that they manufacture, but much more importantly: a class. We go in order from 1-13. District 1 manufactures luxury items and District 2 makes weapons (but mostly trains Peacekeepers), so they have the most privilege and wealth. On the other end, Districts 11 and 12 are the agricultural and coal mining districts, respectively. That's back-breaking work. Not to mention District 11 puts kids as young as 12 to work, and District 12 is poverty-stricken and starving. "But what about District 13?" You may ask, "They make nuclear weapons! Why aren't they up there with 2?" Fantastic question. If we know, and the people of Panem know, that the hierarchy is very clearly set by literal number order, why would one of the most powerful and competent districts be given more power and be put at the top? Placing them at the end lets them believe that they aren't powerful or competent. I mean, jeez, look at 12 and they're before 13? I wouldn't believe I could make it on my own either. (We know now that's not how things go down, but it's a clever power move regardless.)
But after all this, would it hurt Suzanne to give us a single book just for fun?
Yes, I believe it would, that's the whole point. We're not meant to fall for the Peeta/Katniss/Gale love triangle. We're not meant to be interested in Finnick's secrets and early life. We're not meant to want to know the morbid details of how Haymitch won his Games (with double the contestants! Ooh. Aah.) We're meant to be horrified at every turn, at every story. We're meant to ask ourselves how things got so bad, how anyone let this happen. Suzanne Collins has written wonderfully fleshed out characters that grip us and make us want to know more, but the point has never been them or even their loved ones. It was never about Katniss or Prim or Peeta or Finnick or Annie. It's always been about the systems that let this story happen, and where Suzanne got her inspiration: the very real lives we lead. The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes shows us the same thing.
So why Coriolanus Snow? Because he is the catalyst to a broken system that only serves the powerful. If Suzanne were to write a novel about any of our much more beloved characters, then she would be writing the exact same book over and over about the same oppression happening in the same system. She does not write for the sake of bringing her very well-written characters to life, but to flesh out the poverty, the starvation, the power struggles, the horrors they experience. We know this because she writes a lot of her characters as symbols. (Coin, for instance, as the symbol for a power-hungry figurehead, or Prim as the innocent during war.)
Snow is living in a slightly different biome than what we know from The Hunger Games series. He has to make sacrifices and decisions for him and his family, but it's different. It is a view and critique from the inside looking in. This is not Katniss getting to experience the Capitol for the first time and understanding just how terribly unfair everything is. This is someone who is very aware of the way things work and playing the game to stay in power and keep their privilege. Not only that, but it's someone who feels entitled to all of it. In this novel, Suzanne plays around with power and people's position in it. What if a mad scientist was in charge? What if the creator of the thing that brought a semblance of peace was just as horrified as the reader? How far is one person willing to go for power? What if we saw the dawn of a world we're already familiar with?
So I hope she keeps writing, because I love seeing our world through her eyes and the parallels she writes from our world to hers of the injustices happening every day. Even though we'll probably never get the stories we crave, but that's okay. Keep putting those kids through hell, Suzanne.
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renamami · 9 months
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Facts About Romani People Because That One Person Asked For it On My Post About Azusa
A while back I made a post about how I wished people in the Diabolik Lovers fandom focused more on how Azusa is a Romani man and how cool that was for an otome game. Somebody reblogged and asked for somebody to make a post about Romani people so we'd have more reference on how to incorporate Azusa's heritage into more content of him so here it is!
I wanna preface this post by saying that I am not Romani or of Romani descent! I simply like learning about other cultures and groups of people and want people to learn more information about a race that has been villainized and oppressed for centuries. While I'll be discussing basic history, myths and stereotypes, and basics in culture, please make sure you go find Romani creators and people to get more information from! I love Florian on TikTok and YouTube so I recommend checking him out first!
As somebody who is not Romani, there might be some things that aren't completely correct since I'm relying on what is available. Always listen to Romani voices when looking for information. I'm just providing basics and am definitely NOT and expert!
Basic Terminology & History
First off, you might know Romani people often being referred to as the G-word. It's a racial slur that came from people believing they originated in Egypt and has been used for centuries to degrade and demean Romani people. NEVER USE THIS WORD.
The Romani people have a very closed culture and language which has helped them preserve it throughout the years. Translations and translators are hard to find and I don't recommend trying to find any out of respect for the community. What is known, though, is that there are masculine and feminine ways to refer to Romani people.
Romani: The race and communities as a whole
Roma: I'm slightly unclear on this one but it's another way to refer to the race and community itself. Take this with a grain of salt and do your own research
Rom: Way to refer to men as masc Romani people
Romni: Way to refer to women and fem Romani people
Romanipen: The Romani philosophy, rules, laws, and culture (note that there are a bunch of different communities since Romani is a race. There is Christian and Muslim Romani groups and people who's rules differ from others. Like all races, every community is different.)
Gadjo/Gadji: Someone who has no Romanipen, typically someone who is not ethnically Romani but can also mean a Romani person who does not live in Romani culture
Contrary to myth, the Romani people originate from South Asia, more specifically India. It's not clear when in India they came from but it's speculated that they came from the North-West region about 1,000 years ago. From there, they migrated to Europe and other continents. There are Romani populations all over Europe, commonly known mostly in Romania and Spain. Even now, the Romani language still has Indian and South Asian influences as well as Persian and Arabic influences.
From the very beginning, Romani people were discriminated against. They were labeled as wizards, thieves, baby-snatchers, etc. They were enslaved and coerced into chattel slavery in the Middle Ages by the Danubian Principalities where they were divided into groups by their owners. In the 16th-18th centuries, anti-Romani sentiment grew around Europe which led to many Romani people being murdered without any justice being served. They continued to be persecuted and blamed for a range of thing for centuries even up to this day.
In WWII, Romani people, along with Jews and black people, were at the very bottom of Hitler's totem pole and were targeted for ethnic cleansing in the Holocaust. While it's estimated that the death toll came in 150,000 people, others estimate it to be around 1.5 million victims of the Romani Holocaust. Unfortunately, the Romani victims are still very overlooked when the Holocaust and WWII is covered.
Right now, Romani people are still being persecuted and stigmatized. In Romania, they live in squatter communities with high unemployment. While some live a "nomadic" lifestyle, most migration is forced because a ton of communities don't accept Romani settlements. Discrimination is still rampant and all the violence and propaganda that racism entails is still alive and well when it comes to the Romani people, especially in Europe.
Please note that this is a VERY vague history and absolutely does not cover nearly a fraction of Romani history. This is just the cliff notes and I've only scratched the very surface and left out a lot of details.
Myths & Stereotypes
You ever see this shit before?
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What you're looking at right here are racist racial caricatures and oversexualized fantasies of Romani women, specifically "fortune tellers".
Let's quickly get into myths.
Fortune Tellers: Romani people who were impoverished and desperate and down on their luck turned to earning money where they could. It was already a prevalent stereotype that Romani people were witches and mind readers, so many women turned to fortune telling and giving tarot readings because that was what was available to them and were thus painted as occult-loving scam artists. No, they are not supernatural being or seers. In the same way that somebody can practice spirituality, that's what they did. Nothing more, nothing less. Extra tidbit: tarot is not a closed practice specific to the Roma. Saying that it is is like saying banking is a closed practice for Jews. It's racist to push that narrative and if anyone tries to just know they're a dumbass.
The Exotic Wanderer: Romani people very rarely travel out of desire. They travel and migrate because everywhere pushes them out and denies them permanent residence. They aren't free-spirited nomads and portraying them as such further harms them. Speaking of exotic;
The Mysterious and Sexy Romani Woman: Notice how all the women in the picture above are super sexualized or have this air of mystery to them? That's because art, theater, and propaganda has painted Romani women as sexually available and provocative, gaudy, and "exotic". Women of color, you know what I'm talking about because we all deal with it. One of the biggest examples in recent history and the most popular in modern culture is Esmeralda from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame adaptation. She's portrayed as this mysterious and enchanting dark-skin Romni woman who all the guys are after in, again, stereotypical and oversexualized traditional Romani clothing. I mean, they had her essentially pole dance within the first hour of the movie. This portrayal of Romani women in media actively contributes to sexual violence against them. DO NOT ENTERTAIN THAT SHIT.
Thieves, Criminals, and Baby Snatchers: This one has been around for centuries. It's rather self-explanatory so I won't heavily explain the first two. Romani people have been painted as violent outsiders for as long as they've been in Europe and other places. Blaming disease, crime, and things going missing on them was (and often still is) a European's favorite pastime. The baby-snatcher narrative is common in media, again like in Hunchback where Esmeralda was originally a white French girl in the book who was stolen and replaced Quasimodo by Romani people. Obviously this is fucking gross and a vile narrative to push. When I talk more about Azusa, I'll get into adoption more.
There are obviously more myths and stereotypes but these are the biggest ones. Now, to cleanse your eyes, have what real Romani clothing and women look like.
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See the difference? Modesty is a huge aspect of Romani culture.
Culture & Society
Again, much of Romani culture is closed and has been kept alive through remaining closed. This is just what they (or scholars) have chosen to tell and what I have personally learned. It is important to remain respectful of what Romani people do and do not want to share. That said, not much is left of Indian influence in Romani culture save for the people who still celebrate Hindu holidays. However, what has survived is the concept of universal balance. Many believe that everything, or almost everything, fits into a natural place. For example, birds are supposed to fly right? It's chill to eat those if your faith allows it. But a penguin? That bitch doesn't fly, it's a freak of nature, so don't eat it. A penguin is out of balance and, therefore, bad luck. That's why Romani people traditionally don't eat hen eggs because girlie can't fly. Of course, other faiths like Muslim Roma, who have special recipes, eat hen eggs.
Like every race, every community and individual has a different faith. Most popular is Christianity and Catholicism and it has become the primary faith among Romani people. Other religions like Islam and Hinduism are also practiced. These faiths have their own set of rules that they follow alongside Romanipen, which is not written and passed down orally. Romani people even have their own patron saints: Ceferino Giménez Malla, The Virgin of Hope of Macarena who is specific to the Spanish Calé, and Kali Sara who is an Indian deity and protector of the Roma. For Christians and Catholics, they also worship the Virgin Mary and Jesus Christ.
Cleanliness is another big facet of Romani culture. Your genital area is considered impure and unclean. Because of this many Roma do not have pet cats or dogs because they lick their genitals. These rules are so strict that food must be entirely discarded should a strand of hair from these animals get into it as the whole meal is then contaminated. Additionally, tops and bottom are typically washed separately as to not mix pure and impure fabrics. This is especially true for AFAB menstruation, which is also seen as impure, as is childbirth. This is because of Romani code which is the most important part of Romanipen: pillars both honor and shame.
Like many societies, importance is placed on the men and subscribe to expected gender norms. In typical Romani home consists of a married couple, their unmarried children, at least one married son and his wife, and their children. Extended family and family in general are an integral part to Romani society so they will play active roles in a Romani child's life. It is possible to be expelled from your community, however, should you go against your community's rules or, for example, marry a gadjo. This is because, depending on the community, it would bring dishonor.
Every since the 16t century, Romani people have either made their livings or enjoyed their time through music and dance. Both still have Indian influences but have also added other elements depending of the region. For example, belly dancing is big among the Turkish Romani. Have you heard of flamenco music from Spain? Did you know that it came directly from the Romani Calé? Romani music has had a huge influence outside of the community, as it has inspired genres like bolero and jazz music.
Before I go onto how I want to see Romani culture integrated with Azusa content in the future, I want to touch up on adoption and interracial marriage. While interracial marriage is frowned upon in some communities, if a gadjo learns Romanipen and lives their life as if they are Romani, they are accepted as fully Romani. This also goes for adopted children. If they live by the rules and codes, dedicate themselves to the culture and society, then they are fully Romani.
Azusa Mukami, His Romani Identity, and What I Want To See More Of
While Diabolik Lovers does have it's problematic moments when referring to Azusa's past such as calling his community but the g-slur, it's super important to recognize how freaking awesome it is to have a Romani character who is largely not a racial caricature and not portrayed as less than simply for being Rom. He is a fully fleshed out and romancable character which is so cool.
It isn't explicitly stated whether Azusa was adopted by his community or is Rom by blood, but given the time period around the 1960's to 1980's (I recommend looking at @i-write-hurt-not-comfort's blog for more information on the Mukami's timeline) I would recommend steering FAR away from the idea of him being picked up since the baby-snatcher stereotype was and is still big. Plus, it's just so much more fun having a non-white Rom love interest. Let him be brown, y'all. Also, he's Romanian Romani, let me see him be Romanian Romani.
Speaking of which, know he's super pale but I want to see him be South Asian and anemic! It's so rare that Romani people are white and Azusa would look cute with tan or dark skin. I'd love to see more art where he has melanin. Brown and black people can be pale too due to things like anemia. Don't be afraid to make him look like a vampire that has not seen the sun in days who happens to be brown!
This man canonically loves spicy food! You know what race's food is super rich in spices and flavor? Romani food! I'd love fics where we get even a throw away line talking about him eating spicy stew or chile mole. Make him hold Ruki at knifepoint in the kitchen having him make some stuffed peppers.
Even small things like him not eating eggs or separating his tops and bottoms because that's what he learned to do as a child would be so damn nice to see. Tiny things that connect him to his race and heritage would be so cool to see in more content of him.
Final Thoughts
Romani people, each community and each individual, have such rich culture and history. They are incredibly interesting to learn about and have had so much influence over things we might not even thing about. They're not only in Europe. They're every where. South America, the US, Asia, every where. It's about time people started recognizing them outside of what governments and white supremacy teaches us and admire the resilience and beauty of the Romani people. Please do your own research and look for real Romani people to get more information from on TikTok, YouTube, hell even the damn bird app. I hope this helped whoever wanted to know more about the Romani people. Thank you sm for reading too, this was a long one.
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