Excerpt: Cypress Ascending
I was fiddling around with chapter two of Cypress Ascending during my breaks at camp this week, and I actually really love how this turned out, so I figured I'd share an excerpt.
Warning for the death of a parent and fictional funeral rites, please don't read if that's likely to upset you!
When she knelt beside her father's deathbed, Cypress seemed to stare through the candle's light to see only the old man. No, she stared through the old shepherd to see the brilliant young scholar he once was. Scholar turned heretic turned shepherd… Perhaps she stared through even that to simply see Acacia Schyley as he was, in every way that mattered. A caring man and a loving father. Father of Cypress Schyley.
Acacia Schyley opened his eyes one final time to gaze upon his daughter's soft face. She did not cry, and neither did he. He took her hand gently in his own. Cypress handed the lighting candle back to Pax without looking. Her small hands wrapped around her fathers' as he shook. He laid her hands on his chest and sighed.
"I go gladly into Death's warm light," said the old shepherd.
Pax stepped forward, sprinkling ground mushroom dust around the bed, commencing the ritual to usher the old man peacefully into Yarham's realm.
"I have embraced the four Stages of my life," said the heretic.
"Infancy, Taphla, god of beginnings." Pax's soft voice filled the small shack as they lit the first candle. "Adolescence, Hedaph, god of freedom." The wax from the lighting candle dripped a small trail of wax between the first candle and the second. "Adulthood, Raishadin, god of fortitude." The third candle was the largest. "Old age, Eadim, god of resolutions." The fourth and final candle lit, Pax stepped back again.
"I forgive Life for her darkness and thank her for her lessons," said the scholar.
"Haia, god of life, the foundation of all, thanks you for your contributions to the world." Pax's words rang out with an air of finality. "Yarham's light embraces you now."
"One last thing before I go," said Acacia Schyley. "Cypress, my darling daughter, know that I go in peace. I have only ever felt peace and wonder with you by my side. Whatever the gods have in store for you, you will blow them all away." He wrapped her small fingers around his wooden pendant. "Take this, as a reminder of all that I've taught you, and all that you've taught me." He took a shaking breath. "Cypress, you're named for the reaching trees and their deep roots. Don't you ever forget that."
"Don't leave me," Cypress said, her voice feather soft. He placed a shaking hand on her cheek.
"I love you," said a father to his daughter as he closed his eyes. "I love you more than words could describe."
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Dead on main au where
1. Danny wears a 1/2 face mask as a ghost to make sure his parents don’t find out who he is
2. The decision to start wearing the mask was a spontaneous thing that happened at school and he stole the mask from his high school’s theater department
3. Danny moves to Gotham as soon as he turns 18 on a scholarship but it doesn’t include dorm fees.
4. Danny hides out in an abandoned theater (the attic is surprisingly well insulated!!!!) and spends most of his time there as a ghost because he can’t anywhere else in Gotham.
5. An injured Red hood limps his way into one of his favorite old hideouts (the theater obviously), and promptly passes out from blood loss with the hazy image of a masked glowing spector as the last thing he sees.
6. He wakes up enough to hear soft reassurances of safety and feel cool hands carry him with no noticeable strain.
7. Jason comes to in a giant nest of blankets with his wound neatly stitched up, a killer headache, and a sticky note wishing him well/ promising the writer didn’t leak under the helmet (a fact Jason is well aware of considering his head is very much unexploded)
8. Jason tries to leave but he passes out again and is honestly too tired to try again when he comes back around. So he just…falls asleep.
9. Jason wakes up again to warm food on an old silver tray and an empty room, not knowing Danny is watching him from the corner to make sure he doesn’t fall again. Not that Danny wouldn’t catch him again, but he’d prefer it didn’t happen at all.
In short, Danny plays elusive nurse to the dangerous red hood while Jason sees a literal ghost that lives in an abandoned theater wearing a phantom of the opera mask and decides he’s found a keeper. Clearly he appreciates the drama.
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cw. none except satoru being disgustingly cute (part 2)
satoru isn’t used to people calling him anything other than his surname. gojo-san to most, gojo-sensei to others. it’s simple, and gets the job done.
only a handful of people stick to calling him by his given name. to them, he’s satoru. it’s easy, and rolls of the tongue, and he greatly prefers it over the sound of his surname. it makes him feel like an actual person.
satoru never entertained the possibility of being called anything else other than those two names. he didn’t think it would ever happen.
for once, he was glad to be proven wrong.
“tough day, pretty?” you ask gently, and he sighs with a nod as he throws himself into your opened arms. his body moulds easily into yours, and he lets out a heavy groan as he settles onto the couch with you. the groan is loud, and over-exaggerated.
it’s so satoru.
you have to stifle a giggle.
“everything went horribly wrong,” he grumbles, his voice muffled against the fabric of your shirt. “the higher ups were up my ass again, my students laughed at me again, and when i finally made it to that bakery you liked they were out of your favourite pastries so i couldn’t get them for you—again!”
“oh, my poor baby,” you coo, and gently push his bangs out of his face. he nods in agreement, faking an immense amount of sympathy for himself. “‘s okay, at least you tried, hm? i think that’s very sweet.”
satoru hums, as if he’s deeply thinking about your words. “’m still your baby?” he mumbles, deciding that’s the most important thing right now. his eyes briefly flutter shut, consumed by utter bliss as you play with the hairs on his undercut.
“mhm, still my baby.”
“yeah? what else am i?”
this time you do giggle. he does this sometimes. you aren’t exactly sure why—but on tough days, satoru likes to crawl into your arms and listen to you call him every cheesy nickname under the sun. it’s easily providable and makes him so very happy, so you always indulge him.
“my honey bun.”
“and?”
“my boo bear.”
“mhm.”
“my sweetheart.”
“yes?”
you laugh softly. “my mochi,” you coo, and pinch his cheek. it’s a little squished because he’s laying on your chest, but it emphasises your point.
he grins under your touch. it’s adorable.
“keep them coming, please?” he asks, and you do. you always do, unable to refuse him. especially when he asks so sweetly.
“my sugar cookie.”
“my muffin.”
“my baby cakes.”
“my angel.”
“my love.”
“my husband.”
“h—huh?” satoru stammers, looking up from your chest. he lays his chin on your sternum, baby blue eyes blinking up at you. they’re filled with awe, surprise, and utter glee. “that’s, i’m not. . .”
“just testing the title, baby,” you tell him, and continue playing with his hair. he bathes in your touch and you smile softly as he grabs and kisses the palm of your hand. “what do you think, hm?”
“i think you should call me it again.”
“oh?”
“mhm,” he mumbles.
“my dearest husband.”
“again.”
“my handsome husband.”
“again.”
“my sweet husband.”
“again, please?”
you hum, impressed. “my well-mannered husband.”
satoru chuckles, and lays back down on your chest. his white hair tickles against your skin, and he sighs in content.
“i think i want to be your husband for real.”
“yeah?”
“yeah,” he mumbles and nuzzles further into your hold. “y’ve got the same ring size still, right?”
“i sure do,” you say, a content smile on your lips as you watch him slowly doze off to sleep.
“hm, good to know.”
for satoru, those nicknames make him feel as if he’s something even greater than a person—it makes him feel yours.
he’s not just gojo, the strongest. he’s not just satoru, the at-times somewhat immature adult with the sweet tooth of a child.
he’s yours. your baby. your honey bun. your boo bear. your mochi. your boyfriend. your love. and for satoru, there’s no greater thing in the world than that.
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
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