#the confusion and resentment from being rejected over and over just for being you

[eddienashtonn]

there’s something so autistic about the riddler as a character. the frustration of having no one really see you, the need to prove yourself smarter and cleverer than all of them to make up for the fact that you could never fit in with them, the compulsive joy of forcing others to play by your rules, the obsession with truth and answers, the comfort of having your own space where you’re in control, the fear of inadequacy, the isolation and loneliness, the need to be acknowledged in your reality to be satisfied but never able to reach that satisfaction.

[uzurakis]

jjk men w gf who’s overly sensitive and they said something that hurt her feelings? ^___^

FALLING INTO ARGUMENTS?!

featuring: megumi fushiguro. gojo satoru. itadori yuuji. geto suguru.

n. nonnie, allow me to spice your req a bit by make them getting into arguments which hurts your feelings in the process. sorry it took a longer time to write this cause i really don’t want to mess their characterization on this one t—t you also didn’t say i need to end it with comfort so…

GOJO SATORU.

the atmosphere was heavy with tension, as if every breath you took stirred up a storm of unresolved emotions. the soft glow of the desk lamp cast long shadows across the room, accentuating the lines of frustration etched into gojo satoru’s face. his piercing gaze fixed into yours, a silent challenge hanging between both like a veil of uncertainty.

as you stood before him, the weight of his dismissive words bore down on you like a crushing weight. it was as if every syllable was a dagger aimed straight at your heart, each one leaving a deep, painful wound that threatened.

you cried out, "i can help, satoru," your voice quivering with a mix of hurt and desperation. "please, just let me help you."

however, his reply felt akin to a blow to the face. "i don’t need your help, alright?" he yelled, his voice snapping like a whip. "i've got this covered myself.”

the words hung in the air, heavy and suffocating, filling the space between you guys with a palpable sense of defeat.

you begged, your voice almost audible, "but satoru, we're supposed to be in this together. i thought you trusted me. isn't that what relationships are built out of?”. nevertheless, his expression remained impassive, a mask of indifference that hid the pain lurking beneath the surface. “trust has nothing to do with it," he replied, voice colder than you had ever heard it before. "i do better alone."

with those comments, the abyss between you and gojo deepened, threatening to swallow both whole. then as you turned to leave his room, the weight of his rejection settled like a stone in your gut, leaving only a hollow ache and the bitter taste of regret.

the silence of the room was deafening, broken only by the soft hum of the air conditioning and the steady rhythm of his own heartbeat. every fiber of his being screamed for him to go after you, to swallow his pride and beg for your forgiveness, but something held him back, he didn’t want to pull you into his mess any further.

with a heavy sigh, gojo sank into his chair, his shoulders slumping in defeat as he let out a long, ragged breath. the weight of his actions settled on him like a leaden blanket, suffocating him with its suffocating embrace.

tears threatened to spill from his eyes, but he blinked them back, refusing to let himself break down in the face of his own weakness. he had always prided himself on his strength, on his ability to handle any situation with ease and confidence, but now, in the aftermath of this argument, he felt more vulnerable than ever before.

MEGUMI FUSHIGURO

"are you okay, megumi?" you asked softly as you reached out to touch his shoulder.

his usually calm demeanor was replaced by a tense energy that crackled in the air, setting your nerves on edge as he flinched away from your touch, his expression hardening as he turned to face you.

he snapped, "i'm fine," in a tone that was unlike anything you had ever heard. "stop asking me that."

the words were like a slap to the face, leaving you feeling with hurt and confusion. all you had wanted was to help him, to ease the burden he carried on his shoulders, but instead, you found myself faced with a wall of anger and resentment.

you tried to protest whilst trembling with suppressed emotions. "you know you can always talk to me, right? you don't have to go through this alone." yet he shook his head, his eyes dark with pain as he pushed you away. "i said i'm fine!” insisted, tone slightly went higher. "just leave me alone."

the tears threatened to spill over, but you just held it down and bit your lips. with a heavy heart, you turned and left his room.

as the door closed behind you, megumi let out a frustrated growl, the sound muffled by the empty room. he cursed himself silently, his hands clenching into fists at his sides as the weight of his harsh words settled heavily on his shoulders.

"damn it," he muttered under his breath, very much thick with regret. "fuck you, fushiguro.”

the memory of your hurt expression haunted him, a reminder of the pain he had caused with his thoughtless words. he had never meant to hurt you, never intended to push you away, but in his fear and uncertainty, he had lashed out without thinking, building walls around himself to keep you out.

now, as he stood alone in the quiet solitude of his room, he realized the magnitude of his mistake. he had pushed away the one person who had always been there for him, the one person who had never given up on him, and now he was left to face the consequences of his actions.

with a heavy sigh, the man sank onto his bed, running a hand through his hair as he tried to make sense of the mess he had created. he knew that he needed to apologize, to make things right, but the thought of facing you again filled him with a sense of dread.

ITADORI YUUJI

under the soft glow of streetlights, yuuji and you found yourselves standing at the edge of a heated argument that threatened to consume the bond between you. the cool night air was heavy with tension, each word you and he exchanged hanging in the air like a cloud of unresolved emotions.

"i just wish you would trust me, yuuji." you said, sounding frustrated as you looked for any indication that he might understand.

however, he shook his head, his expression stubborn and closed off. "i do trust you, but this is different. i need to handle this on my own, babe.”

his remarks pierce deeply. it seemed that he was shutting you down even though all you wanted to do was to help him. you looked at yuuji and said, "i can't just watch you struggle."

"just, give me some time alone, okay?”

the hurt in his voice mirrored your own. as you watched him walk away, the sting of his words lingered like a bitter taste in your mouth. just as you turned to leave, you heard him call out your name, his voice filled with panic and regret. "wait! baby, i'm sorry. i didn't mean it like that."

you turned back to face him, the ache in your chest easing slightly at the sight of his vulnerability. in that moment, you understood that beneath his tough exterior, he was just as scared and uncertain as you were.

"it's okay, yuuji," you calmed him down, reaching out to take his hand in yours. "we'll figure this out together."

GETO SUGURU

you couldn't stand idly by as suguru pushed himself into further depression from time and time again, and tonight, you had finally reached your breaking point.

"suguru, you need to take better care of yourself," you begged, tinged with frustration and concern. "you can't keep treating yourself like this."

“is there really nothing i can do to help you?”

only he scoffed at your worries, waving off your concerns with a dismissive gesture, expression stubborn and unyielding. "i'm fine, babe.” with a deep sigh, geto suguru pointed out, "and what would you know about my problems, huh?" he reacted with resentment.

those words cut deep, leaving you mourning with hurt and disbelief.

"suguru..” you claimed, “do you really think i would just stand there as you destroy yourself? when you mean so much to me?”

his eyes softened at your words, a flicker of regret passing over his features before he shook his head, expression hardening as he turned away from you. "i don't need your help," he spat.

“i can take care of myself."

the finality of his words hung in the air like a heavy weight, crushing the last vestiges of hope that lingered in.

"fuck, i'm sorry," he murmured right before you decided to walk away. "i didn't mean to worry you."

“i, i just don’t know what to do with myself. shit, i’m so sorry.”

you turned back to face him, tears welling in your eyes as he crossed the room to pull you into a tight embrace. his familiar arms curled around you, providing comfort and warmth despite the tension. you could feel his heartbeat against yours, a rhythm that expressed both guilt and tenderness. at last, words were unnecessary as you allowed the quiet to envelope both, saying more than any apology could.

@uzurakis — requests are open! <3

[suuuupernovaaa]

nìfnu

nìfnu [nɪ.ˈfnu] adv. silently

Anonymous Request: Can I have a story where it’s Ao’nung x Metkayina Reader who’s deaf and a sweetheart. When the Sullys arrive she doesn’t really interact with them so when they see Ao’nung being kind and protective towards her it they feel confused? Just pure fluff.

Lo'ak leans over and nudges his older sister, Kiri, forcefully on the arm.

"Ouch!" she yelps. "What, Lo'ak?"

He points, and she follows the line from his finger. It leads her eyes to Ao'nung, just a few paces down the beach from them, and he's with a Metkayina girl that Kiri doesn't recognize. She's tall, nearly as tall as Ao'nung, with her long hair pulled back into one large, thick braid. She wears a thin, shiny net over her shoulders, and Kiri notes how pretty it is. It glimmers in the sun. Kiri also notes how, even though Ao'nung and this girl are above walker, they are using the hand-speak to communicate.

"That girl. Neteyam tried to talk to her earlier, but she ignored him. And there she is, being so nice to Ao'nung. Who's an asshole."

Kiri elbows her sibling. "To you, he is. He looks like he's being perfectly friendly to that girl. And, I mean, she's very pretty."

"Why are they using the hand speak? They're not in the water."

Kiri shrugs. "How should I know? Stop elbowing me when you want something, Lo'ak. It hurts."

He groans and rolls his eyes, and turns his attention back to Ao'nung and the girl who rejected Neteyam.

--

"How are they adjusting?" I sign to Ao'nung, who shrugs and rolls his eyes. It's no secret that he resents having to teach the newcomers their ways, but I think it's nice. Ao'nung needs to humble himself sometimes, be more like his kind little sister.

"They are slow," Ao'nung signs in return. "I don't want to teach them. It's a waste of my time."

I reach out, pushing on his arm a little. "They seem sweet to me, especially the little one. Try to have patience with them. I would offer to help, but they don't know how to talk to me."

"Yet," he replies, and I smile.

"Yet."

--

Neteyam asks Tsireya about the girl, Y/N, the next day. He's noticed that she only uses hand-speak as well, and wonders.

"She can't hear," Tsireya says. "She's only spoken that way her whole life."

Neteyam could smack himself. He'd taken her silence as harsh rejection, when really, she just wasn't able to respond to him.

"Oh!" he exclaims. "She's, uh, really beautiful."

Tsireya laughs and smiles. "She is, but I wouldn't trouble yourself. Ao'nung has been in love with her for years." She throws a glance to her brother over her shoulder, but he's too busy making fun of Lo'ak to hear.

"Ao'nung?" Neteyam replies hardly, and Tsireya laughs even harder.

"I know. He has a soft spot for her, and her for him. If you want to compete, you'll have to learn hand-speak."

Neteyam shakes his head. She's beautiful, but not worth getting in a fight with the chief's son over. He'll just have to admire her from afar.

--

Though I can't speak, I am very proficient in reading lips. This helps me observe conversations from far away; as long as I have a clear view of someone's face, I can usually figure out what they're saying.

"Ao'nung has been in love with her for years."

That's what Tsireya said, and though she was smiling, it didn't seem as if she was joking. I dropped the plate of fruit I was carrying when she said it.

Is it true? Has Ao'nung been in love with me, and I haven't noticed?

Fruit is scattered all around my feet, and I bend over to begin gathering it again, every interaction I've had with Ao'nung recently playing over in my mind. If Tsireya is right, maybe I have been blind.

Ao'nung has always been kind, and patient and gentle with me. I knew he wasn't like that with many people, but I thought it was most likely out of pity for my condition - not out of love of affection.

A hand reaches out, picking up fruit and dropping it into my basket, and I look up to see Ao'nung himself.

Feeling flustered, I stand up, kicking the fruit basket once again, undoing all my work.

"Are you okay?" Ao'nung signs. I tuck my hair behind my ears, feeling a little speechless. "Y/N, what's wrong?"

"Tsireya," I sign, "she told the new boy, the oldest one, that you are in love with me. Is she just teasing him, because he thinks I'm pretty?"

"He said he thinks you're pretty?" Ao'nung signs back, quickly and furiously, glancing over his shoulder at where his sister still sits with the newcomers.

I shove his shoulder. "Yes! Answer my question."

"Well... come with me." Ao'nung reaches out, grabbing my hand and therefore silencing me, and pulls me away from the beach. We move through many huts, past the fires, and to the edge of the beach, where the sparse forest and rocks begin. Here, we are alone.

"Ao'nung!" I exclaim, breathless. "What's going on?"

He rubs his forehead. "I had a plan, to tell you. It wasn't going to be like this. I'm going to kill Tsireya."

I stand, silent, waiting for him to finish. My heart is beating out of my chest, and my palms are shaking; I'm not sure I could speak, even if I wanted to.

"For a long time, I have loved you, Y/N. I have tried to be more... understanding, and gentle, the way you deserve. But it's hard for me. I wanted to be better, before I told you. Before I asked you to be my mate."

Unable to control myself, I gasp, and bring my hands up to my mouth.

Me, the mate to the next Olo'eyktan? It's unimaginable.

"Your parents approve the match?" I ask.

Ao'nung smiles at me softly. "Of course. When I told them how much I love you, they couldn't object. They believe you will make a wonderful Tsahik, because you are so kind and understanding. My mother will teach you everything you need to know - if you want."

That thought alone is a little overwhelming, since Ronal can be so intimidating, but I also imagine she can be a good teacher.

And really, that doesn't matter. What matters is the way I feel when I'm with Ao'nung; special, adored, loved, doted upon. I feel safe with Ao'nung. I feel seen and most importantly, heard.

"I would be proud to be your mate, Ao'nung. So proud. Of course, I love you."

The smile that spreads across his face transforms Ao'nung from the sullen, anxious, grouchy man most have come to know him as. It turns him into the carefree, light and happy man he is when the two of us are together.

I am proud to make him smile like that. I promise myself then, to make him smile like that every day, for the rest of our lives.

[cherryredstars]

First off, I love you.

Second off, I love you A LOT.

Okay so I’m losing my mind over a brain vomit where younger reader’s been harboring and hiding feelings for Miguel for the sake of being appropriate and it’s starting to make her frustrated like “fuck I’m gonna get actually fucking sick and vomit” because how much she’s crushing on him is CRAZY, so reader basically goes up to Miguel like “I can’t take this anymore.” Like reject me so I can move on type of thing. “ Do me a favor, and break my nose or something. Tell me to fucking go away” or something like that. My brain is burning.

Pairing(s): Miguel O'Hara x fem!reader, John Price x civil!reader

Warnings: Fluff

A/N: For my baby, I LOVE YOUUUUUUU!!!

Edited (just for you boo)

| Miguel O'Hara

If you look at him, you will actually throw up.

Like projectile 'make yourself a laughing stock' throw up. It's just the way your body- your stomach- reacts when you see him. It gets twisted, fluttery with a fix of butterflies and disgust. It's down right disgusting, inappropriate at the least. He's almost a decade older than you, yet here you are pining after him as if you're some teenage girl. You feel physically sick when you think about it for too long: throat contracting and your stomach hurting. You aren't sure which of your delusions are the cause of such a horrendous crush, but you promise you'll strangle it when you find out. There is simply no way this could have ever worked out in your favor. It's simply impossible.

Miguel O'Hara would never go for someone like you. Young and naive, haven't even reached the appropriate age to have a mid-life crisis (but you're sure this is the closest fucking thing to it). You know this, hammer it into your thick skull every day before you have to face him. Yet, it all comes crumbling down when you lay eyes on him. It takes less than a second for you to skip after him, a stupid, lovesick look flickering across your face as you help him with whatever he needs. You simply can't stay away, even if you tried. You always fall back into his orbit, gravity pushing you towards him until you're practically glued to him.

You're sure he must find it annoying. Probably relates it to something like babysitting. It's well known Miguel doesn't like to be bothered when he's working. But there you are without fail, sitting around on his platform entertaining yourself by playing with LYLA when you aren't out saving universes. You don't miss the way his eyes flick to you every now and then with some emotion you can't quite place. But if you had to guess, it's probably something close to exasperation.

In all honesty, you're tired of it.

Tired of the false hope you delude yourself into believing after every minor interaction. Tired of trying to justify your affection for the older man. Tired of feeling a bit of resentment towards yourself. You're just... tired. He must sense it when you walk onto the platform, judging by the look he shoots you.

LYLA is muted mid-sentence as he angles his body slightly away from his monitors and towards you, watching as you plop yourself in your usual spot. He waits expectantly for your usual greeting, brows furrowing with confusion when you do nothing but play with the elastic quality of your suit. You haven't even looked at him since you got in.

"Everything alright?" His all so familiar voice asks, making your stomach ache and the urge to punch yourself stronger.

"Yeah," you respond simply, silence lapping over the two of you.

Miguel waits patiently, expecting something more. But, you don't continue. Miguel hesitates for a moment before turning back around. His eyes study the screens once more, his finger hovering over the button to unmute LYLA before you speak up again.

"Can you like... degrade me or something?"

Miguel almost chokes on his spit when he turns around, not expecting you to say...that. You're still playing with your suit and staring at the floor, face painted with frustration. You look up when he doesn't answer, brows furrowed when your eyes meet his shocked face. You quickly divert your attention to his muscular shoulder, not really having the courage to face him head-on.

"Not like the... sexy kind. More like the heart wrenching kind." You clarify, not that it's any better for Miguel.

He turns to full face you this time, arms crossed over his chest as he studies you. The request doesn't really make sense to him. Why would you want him to do that? Is it some universe-exclusive culture he isn't aware of?

"Why?" Miguel asks, trying to recall your past interactions to see if they have something to do with your strange request.

"I dunno, just thought it might make it easier?" You shrug, your eyes flicking to his again and then looking towards the ceiling.

"Make what easier, exactly?"

Miguel isn't a fan of cryptic answers, but he tries to be patient with you. He watches as your face twists, unsure how to word what you're feeling. You let out a heavy sigh eventually, actually meeting his eyes and holding his gaze for once.

"To get over you."

The words cause Miguel to freeze, his body going rigid. You groan, hiding your embarrassed face in your hands and scrubbing ferociously. This is absolutely embarrassing. You wished a random portal would just appear under you, throwing you into another universe and far away from this particular moment in time.

You're so caught up in your embarrassment that you don't realize Miguel is walking over to you until he's crouched down in front of you. He pries your hands gently from your face, giving you the softest smile you have ever seen on him. His thumbs caress your wrists absentmindedly, doing nothing to calm your raging heart. It practically explodes when he leans closer, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. Your eyes are wide and dazed as you look up at him, trying to commit the curve of his mouth to memory.

"Now, why would I want you to do that?"

_____________

| John Price

You aren't exactly sure when it started.

But the moment you realized you liked John, you've started hating yourself. It feels wrong. Almost disrespectful in a way. You aren't particularly sure why, it just does. John Price is a nice man, a good man. A man that could be easily mistaken as your father if someone didn't look close enough. The man you had happened to meet and befriended one day after he had been so kind and gentle with you.

Not the man you should be liking and forcing your feelings on.

You're someone John goes to for comfort, someone he seeks out after coming home from a battlefield. Someone that's supposed to help him distress. The idea of taking advantage of that gently placed trust, of expecting something from John just because he goes to you for help, makes you want to throw up until you're nothing but a useless husk. It's shameful, eating you up on the inside until you feel like your organs are on the verge of failure.

So your solution: Avoid Johnathan Price like the plague.

Does it hurt seeing his texts flash across your phone screen, asking you if you're free throughout the week so he can spend time with you before he deploys again? Hell fucking yes. It makes you feel guilty as hell. But you try to justify it to yourself, reassuring that it's only temporary. That everything will go back to normal once these stupid feelings leave you alone and John Price goes back to being the sweet man you grab lunch with every now and then when he's home so you can catch up.

But of course, your plans never go accordingly.

You startle on your couch when there is a firm knocking on your door, your hands rushing to pause the telly to see if it was just a hallucination. But sure enough, that same steady knocking sounds again. You get up hesitantly, brows furrowed as you try to remember if you ordered take away or something. You peak through the peep-hole, hand planted on the cool wood of the door as you squint.

The alertness in your body dies away when the familiar frame of John greets you, only to tense up again. John Price is at your door. The same John price you've been avoiding for a week. The same exact John fucking Price you're practically in love with. Your hand slides down to the knob, gulping nervously as you unlock it and yank your door open.

John is standing there with his hand raised again to knock, decked out in his military gear. His hands drop to grip the strap of his vest, his mutton chops quivering as his face lifts into his soft smile. You blink up at him, feeling the knob warm under your hand and your heart slamming against your chest. Why did he have to be so handsome, goddamnit?

You step out of the doorway, silently inviting him inside. He accepts it, stepping in and examining the area out of habit. You close the door quietly after him, turning to face him as he turns to face you.

"Missed ya, love? Been busy lately?" He asks in that comfortingly rough voice of his.

You don't trust yourself to not choke on your words, scared he'll see through your lies. Instead you nod, letting out a weak hum that he returns in a more confident note. Your eyes drop down to his military gear, a frown slipping onto your face. Is he being deployed again?

As if sensing the underlying question, John's hands let go of his military vest and he stuffs them into the pockets of his tactical pants.

"Heading out tonight, just wanted to say goodbye before I go since I didn't get to see you this time around."

You feel a stab to your chest at his words, resisting the urge to lift your hand and smooth the pain.

"John..." You start hesitantly, your mouth going dry when he hums again. "Can you tell me you hate me? Or... or that you think I'm stupid or something?"

John tilts his head in confusion, brows furrowing as his lips thin. There is a silent question in your eyes, an aura of demand wafting from him that orders you to explain further. Your hand comes to rub your arm, socked heel digging into your ankle as you debate how much to tell him.

"It's just... I like you and I don't..." You sigh in frustration, turning your head away to glare at the wall. "I don't want you to think I'm trying to take advantage of how nice you've been to me or that I expect you to reciprocate how I feel."

It's quiet for a moment before John's chuckling fills the room. Your head turns away from the wall, meeting the sparkling amusement in John's eyes as he looks at you. There is a fondness there that makes your knees feel weak, your breath getting trapped in your lungs. John takes steady, reassured steps towards you, stopping when he's centimeters away. Your heart is practically lurching in your chest as you look up at him, watching as he slowly takes off his boonie hat.

Your eyes are wide as he places it over your head, chuckling when it slips down over your face before he readjusts it. He admires the sight for a second before he leans down, his facial hair tickling your cheeks as his lips press against the corner of your mouth. Your heart officially stops, your body dangerously close to swaying as he pulls away. You're in a daze as he pinches your cheek lightly, trying to call your attention away from the sparks lingering across your skin.

"We'll take about this when I get back, silly girl." He rumbles, his heavy paw landing on the top of his hat before he slips past you, closing and locking the door behind him as he disappears out of your flat. You're left in a daze as your shaky hands reach up and grasp the rim of his hat, the smell of him instantly invading your senses.

And when John reaches base and the lads pester him about where his usual hat is, he just shakes his head and replies that he left it at home for safe keeping.

[qtubbo]

Note: For people who were just watching Phil’s POV, while this was still present it much harder to notice how genuinely insecure Phil was making Sunny feel, being much more blatant with full context of who Sunny is through Tubbo’s entire POV of them.

QPhil was incredibly mean spirited towards Sunny, to the point where it felt much more purposeful rather than Phil just being in a weird mood, he was also unnecessary judgement towards Tubbo’s parenting. To an extreme unmatched by any of the other older parents to any of the new parents, constantly mocking Tubbo’s builds, abilities, and rules. While he started off very pleasant towards if not a bit confused, as the day progressed and later conversation from Phil about Sunny he became more bluntly resentful and annoyed. The easiest way to simplify his actions is to consider him acting like Tubbo’s cruel mother in law, if you know the trope.

I think this was done from the simple fact that he missed his kids, and was projecting his own relationship with Tallulah onto Tubbo and Sunny. A lot of how he treated Sunny at the beginning was more similar to how he treats Tallulah and as the day went by the more certain I felt that he was projecting Tallulah onto Sunny. He was more critical of his parenting because he wanted for Sunny what he would want for Tallulah, he rejected a lot of Sunny’s actual wants because he knows what’s good enough for his daughter and what Tubbo was doing wasn’t enough. This is also why he was rejecting of Sunny’s actual wants because he was coping through her, anytime Sunny strayed off what Tallulah wanted it was hurting his illusion and therefore needed to be squashed.

Sunny came off as cold to Phil, because instead of giving her bright personality to him it was given to Tubbo. The more they strayed from Tallulah’s personality the harder it was to continue pretending, he wanted Tallulah and got Sunny, and he resented Sunny for that. I fully doubt this was on purpose, rather Phil was subconsciously projecting is own daughter on to Tubbo’s. Nothing Sunny could have done would have made Phil love her, even though she was trying so hard to be loved by the man their Pa looks up to. This becomes even more obvious when you compare his relationship to Sunny to his one with Empanada. While I don’t consider Em and Tallulah to be very close in personality, I think they are similar enough to scratch that itch for Phil and Empanada was less reserved then Sunny making Phil feel that was kinder than Sunny. Which was inevitably why he ended up saying the most hurtful thing of all about Sunny to Tallulah.

“Sunny’s nice I’ve met with them, and talked to them about stuff. She likes money.”

“Oh look over there, there’s Empanada! You’ll really like Empanada!”

He said this to comfort Tallulah but he still said it in front of Sunny, Kids notice that stuff when you talk about them like an afterthought, and then the next kid with full blown excitement it hurts. You’ll like Empanada you won’t like Sunny.

Also I’ll analyze Tubbo and Phil’s relationship more in another post, since I’ve seen a lot of conversation around it right now and I wanted to say something on its own. As a second note I took out a lot of the crueler comments Phil said in private since while he did say them, I would only include them if I had quotes as to not accidentally villainize him through misremembering.

[valewritessss]

I saw someone on TikTok say that Percabeth is one sided and all I could say is that it looks like someone didn’t read Mark of Athena. Then I did some research and I found out they’re a Pereyna shipper(I had no idea that existed).

Personally, I don't get it, Reyna literally just tried to make a move on Percy but he rejected her and neither of them thought about it again so I don’t really see it. Either way, that's not the issue because I don't really care what people ship as long as it's not weird or creepy (I'm looking at any Artemis x Percy, Luke x Percy, Annabeth x Luke, or Percy x Nico shippers).

But back to the Percabeth is one sided thing, I’m a little bit confused. Because, did they miss the Annabeth pining silently but obviously for Percy for YEARS, Annabeth being jealous of Rachel partly because she liked Percy, Annabeth telling Athena that Percy is everything to her, Annabeth driving herself crazy those months Percy was gone and searching for him without giving up. So “Percabeth is one sided” where???

Then upon further research I found that of course, turns out they are an Annabeth hater(they don’t admit it but it’s obvious for apparent reasons). Some of their reasons: Annabeth's nickname for Percy, “seaweed brain” is degrading and implies he is stupid, Annabeth is mean to Rachel, and Annabeth is scared of Percy which made him feel like he deserves to die.

1. Annabeths nickname for Percy started out as teasing but became endearing for the both of them, just like the nickname “wise girl”. Percy even gets mad at Thalia for using this nickname because he considers it something solely Annabeth can use. In no way has Percy ever said or even mentioned that he feels put down because of the nickname. Also, Percy never hesitates to call anyone, even gods, out on their shit, so if it was really bothering him, he would most likely say something.

2. Honestly, the whole deal with Rachel was never that deep. Like, it did have a deeper meaning for Annabeth than many could comprehend but the whole catty part was never that big. A few snide remarks, sure, but it's not like she was bullying Rachel. If anyone thinks otherwise, that's okay, but in my opinion it was meant to be funny and it came off as such, and even Rachel and Annabeth themselves moved on and became fiends. Moving forward, considering the context of Annabeth's jealousy, it makes total sense for her to feel resentment towards Rachel. I'm not saying it's justified, but if a boy she'd been crushing on for years and is destined to die soon spends his last summer with another girl who is closer to normal than Annabeth could ever be, in what world would she not be mad? In fact, some of it was just teenage pettiness. And that's fine, she wasn't hurting anyone. Being a teenager with a crush is hard, and it's harder when you're a demigod with a huge prophecy hanging over you and your best friends heads. So is her anger justified? Maybe. But is she valid? Absolutely.

3. This is the most ridiculous reason yet. First of all, has Percy ever told Annabeth he feels like he deserves to die? I don't think so. Especially not before he almost let himself die with Jason there. I don't know if that person was just expecting Annabeth to guess, or what. Secondly, they were in Tartarus, and Percy did something scary. So of course, Annabeth is going to be scared. If Percy feels like Annabeth being scared makes him want to die, that's not really Annabeth's fault. And to expect Annabeth to make him feel better about something she is still recovering from herself doesn't make much sense, does it. At this point it just felt like they were going to hate Annabeth regardless, and these weren't actual issues they had with her they just saw a reason to hate her and went for it.

Hey, ship whatever you want and hate whoever you want, but don't come with false interpretations(that I know was easy to comprehend) as evidence for why you are right, please.

[traumxrei-archive]

Suddenly getting emotional thinking about Jamil and how his life was chosen for him when he was born. If he would take the chance to leave his position if he could- if he'd feel lost with his newfound freedom or resentment at all his skills that, while he's great at them, were gained because he served Kalim.

I wonder how it is that others can't notice Jamil, how others can see him as just Kalim's shadow, how anyone can say, "Just have Jamil do it." And then there's you, who will look past Kalim to look for Jamil. You, who can ignore Kalim unintentionally because your staring at and daydreaming about Jamil. When you ask something of Jamil, you're not asking because it's his duty as a servant or tossing him some task while not caring if he can do it or not- we ask specifically for him because we know he can do it.

And trying to imagine how Jamil would be able to see the difference. How he'd be used to not really being seen- the name Jamil is not an individual, just the name for a faceless, identity-less thing in the background who's supposed to live for others. How he is confused when you show up at the dorm and brush off Kalim's friendly advances because you came specifically for Jamil. How you invite him to be on the other social side that he's always served- "Jamil, you haven't eaten yet, come join us!", "Jamil, you keep doing homework, I can go get that for Kalim", "Leave it for someone else to clean up, we weren't the ones responsible in the first place."

How those sitting with Kalim don't even register that he's in the room, but when it's you, your whole face lights up when you spot him. How you can't look away from his face until you've given him a smile that's brimming with your love for him. And how foreign this feels to Jamil, but maybe he doesn't hate it.

(Aka how I hadn't fully understood how Jamil felt because I acknowledged him as an individual from the start and didn't think properly about how he's typically seen as just an object in the Al-Asim household)

anon.............anon you should open a writing blog. like. i am at a loss. because you put into words the inexplicable sadness that i feel about jamil... this is so perfect that i don't think i'll be able to add much onto it, but i'll try anyway. maybe we'll take jamil's perspective, since you wrote so in depth about the prefect's perspective....

of course, your existence kind of greatly irritated jamil—at first. especially after you ruined his perfect plan to take over scarabia....but that doesn't matter now. now, he's perplexed.

he thought that you would avoid him like the plague, especially after all that he subjected you to during winter break. but instead, he started noticing you. it did help that you had a literal flaming cat next to you at all times, but he started seeing you a whole lot more.

and he felt like you were seeing him.

usually, he would wait on the side in busy hallways as kalim chattered happily with his classmates, waiting to deliver him to his next class. but he found that he was the one being sought out by you. which was weird, everyone had always wanted to talk to kalim, not him. but there you were, asking him mundane questions like how did he make that potion so easily? (practice, he answered.) what did he have for lunch? (kalim's favorite shawarmas. no, he didn't have extras.)

and he wouldn't be lying if he wasn't waiting for a certain question. one where you would ask him for a favor of some sort, and where he would have to don a mask and agree to whatever they wanted but... that question never came. he heard grim hollering for you, and just like that you were gone. huh. now that was new.

jamil noticed it happening more and more as time went by, especially as your visits to the scarabia dorm increased. at first he thought you visited solely for the food. which would mean more work for him. but he found that you weren't with kalim most of the time. rather you were rejecting kalim's proposals for holding feasts quite effectively.

instead you came to him, sometimes for a quick chat, sometimes you'd ask if he needed help. (he would always say no, the response trained into him for years upon years) but you would insist anyway, and he always found a small smile on his face whenever he was faced with your antics. (of course, he tried hard to make sure to hide those smiles behind a carefully placed hand)

jamil didn't really know when "resenting you" became "tolerating you" and he was even more clueless on how that feeling had evolved into "being fond of you".

maybe it was the time where you pushed him right past a messy-looking scarabia lounge, claiming that it wasn't his mess to clean up. or maybe it was one of the times where he was about to bunk basketball practice because kalim had called, and you said you could could meet kalim on his behalf. or maybe the time you pulled him into the school kitchens to show off lopsided-looking vada pavs that you made from one of the cookbooks he lent you.

maybe it was all the little things.

but around you, he didn't feel like "jamil viper, firstborn of the viper family" or "jamil viper, attendant to kalim al asim". no, he felt like "just jamil viper".

and maybe that's why jamil doesn't stop it when he felt that fondness turning into something brighter and more explosive. maybe that was why he started going to you— sitting next to you in your shared classes, bringing you snacks he made during lunch, or even visiting ramshackle. he found that he couldn't get enough of spending time with you. and jamil found that he didn't hate that.

(though jamil never said it outloud, you could see it in the way his eyes sparkled when he was with you, as cliche as it sounded. though his expressions remained schooled, there was something there that told you that jamil viper really, truly cared about you.)

n e ways, that's it for me. i hope you enjoyed reading my addition anon,,,,even though idk if you'll even see this since it's been so long. but i thoroughly enjoyed that sudden jamil brainrot ^^

[ashprince-of-bel-air]

Do you have any thoughts about Rolan finding out his human female crush genuinely thinks he hates her even now? Thanks!

So, this is less thoughts, more of a One Shot kind of thing I hope that's okay? This was the only way I could get my ideas/thoughts to be somewhat coherent!

Rolan had always been a bit of a prickly person, people were not quick to warm to him due to his outwardly sassy and confrontational nature at times, even his deep thick voice made him sound constantly annoyed, not to mention the constant furrow of his brow that gave off the aura of pure annoyance. His siblings Cal and Lia were subject to a lot of his rants, they knew better to know he never meant it in an angry way, he just felt his emotions far too intensely and did not know how to convey them properly.

When Rolan had hired his new human assistant at sorcerers sundries he thought she was beautiful, her beauty transcendent to him even. Yet he did not have the time for her now, too much needed to be done in Ramazith’s Tower and to Sorcerer’s Sundries, he could not let himself be distracted by such a paltry reason as an attractive assistant. Rolan would keep her at arm’s length, not overly engaging with her, giving one word answers as she brought him supper or the tomes he had requested. Unbeknownst to her he would watch from afar, his affection growing deeper each day as he was transfixed upon her form, growing even fonder as he learned of her intelligence and capabilities, organising the staff in the shop without being told what to do, re arranging the extensive library to make it even more efficient. These were things that Rolan hadn’t even asked for, yet they made his life so much easier as the transition period of his leadership was taking place.

It was not as if she had not tried to gain Rolan’s friendship, she tried talking to him when she attended his needs in his study, throwing herself into her work hoping he would notice and praise her, alas it was not so. Each curt dismissal and one word answer to her friendly exchanges made her sadder each day, slowly making her feel like he resented her appearance in his tower and that he genuinely disliked her. The weeks would draw on and she would return the energy that Rolan was giving her, something that he would not notice as he threw himself further into his work now that it was nearing its end, wanting to reach the light at the end of the tunnel.

Once the final stages of the takeover of Sorcerer’s Sundries had been completed, it was decided that its entire staff would celebrate all their hard work at the local tavern, it was something that they had all earned at this point. Rolan would walk in with his siblings to celebrate, now finally free to speak to his enrapturing assistant, he sought her out in the crowd and attempted to walk over to her and catch her eye. She would not return this feeling and made a point to walk away, her thoughts were that he hated her anyway so whatever he wanted would not be good, plus she did not want him to ruin her night of fun now that she finally had a day off.

Rolan stopped dead in his tracks as he saw the look on her face and walk away, confused at the reaction, he was not aware that he had done anything to offend her, he had been polite and gentlemanly to her hadn’t he? Turning to face Cal and Lia with a confused face as he saw them giggling to each other, he knew they were good friends with her so he wanted their opinion, yet was shocked to see their reaction, why would they be laughing?

“Oh do share what is ever so funny won’t you” His voice curt and annoyed at their teasing of him, crossing his arms over his chest in frustration, he had told them of his plan to speak to her on the way to the tavern so why would they mock him for being rejected now is what he asked himself.

Lia was the one to speak, controlling the giggle in her tone. “You do know she thinks you hate her right?” The siblings were not amused at his rejection, but they had always found it hilarious at how clueless Rolan would be in certain situations.

“What? Hate Her? Why?” For once Rolan’s voice went soft and incredulous as his eyes widened and shoulders slumped, desperately hoping that she really didn’t think that, he could never hate her. She was beautiful beyond compare, so wonderfully intelligent and incredibly attentive, he had wanted her from the moment he laid eyes on her.

“Brother” The words fell from Cal’s mouth softly, not wanting to upset Rolan any further, as he could see the pain and confusion in his eyes. “Have you not noticed how you are with her? You do not engage and you dismiss her with far too much ease, if anyone treat me like that I would assume they hated me” Cal’s eyes went soft as he said this to him, he knew he was not the best with emotions but did not think he would be so dense as to not understand how his actions may have offended her.

A wave of realisation rushed over Rolan as his body slumped, finally coming to terms with how his actions may have upset her over the last few weeks, it was not his intention to be so cold and uninviting, he certainly did not want her to hate him. The rest of his night was sat at the bar, watching her from across the room, seeing her smile light up her face as he drowned his own sorrows in wine. He was now too embarrassed to go over to her, ashamed by his own behaviour, instead he would spend the night getting drunk and thinking of ways he could rectify his previous actions, proving that he does care for her rather than hating her.

[hagumiluver]

Why I Love Shizuku Hinomori

This is less gonna be a full blown analysis and more me gushing over Shizuku and her unit focuses but here we go:

From first impressions, Shizuku comes off as someone who's absolutely gorgeous, but also an airhead. This is probably how alot of people perceive in her in the fandom.

But — just from the main story alone, you can see that's she's much more than that. During MMJ's main story, she offers to help train Minori in order to pass her idol audition, displaying her kindness from the very beginning. However, an altercation occurs between Shizuku and Airi — a fellow idol who's also her rival. Airi lashes out at her, admitting feelings of jealously towards the girl for being admired as an actual idol while she gets reduced to nothing but a laughing stock.

Shizuku runs away in tears, while Airi immediately regrets her actions towards the rival that she admired and looked up to. The tall idol thinks about her past, specifically with how Airi encouraged her to keep going as an idol despite her low confidence — which is why Airi's words shattered her heart deeply, as Shizuku believed that she was different from the others who only sought after her looks.

We also get to learn about CheerfulDays, the now ex idol group that Shizuku was in. They held very strong feelings towards her due to the fact that she was favored by their managers, and got special treatment, even though they all put in the effort as idols.

I'll talk about her treatment in CheerfulDays in more detail later, but for now... The idol makes a sudden decision to quit the group, which surprises Minori, Haruka, and especially Airi. The three go and confront CheerfulDays, ending with Shizuku bidding farewell to the idol group, holding no resentment to them despite their mistreatment of her.

Shizuku's kindness is something that gets displayed as early as the main story, with her accepting Airi's apology quickly, and politely saying goodbye to her ex group mates, even briefly apologizing for being disappointing as the center.

Fast forwarding a bit, MMJ gets formed — and makes the decision to do livestreams, as they seem to be best option for independent idol groups such as themselves.

During Shizuku's first event story, MMJ officially announces their formation to the world, with them getting mixed responses — mostly from the people who supported Airi, Haruka, and especially Shizuku in their past groups.

We get more elaboration on what exactly happend with Shizuku while she was in CheerfulDays, and learn that she acted very drastically from the girl that people close to her know her as. She was elegant, confident, and flawless — essentially "perfect."

However — this persona of hers was heavily pushed by her managers, with them editing out any mistakes in talk shows, TV recordings, and more. Alot of the attention she got was mostly from to her looks, which led people to have their own perceptions of how she acted, only to get deeply disappointed by Shizuku's actual personality.

This led to Shizuku feeling very self conscious of how she acted, making sure that she behaved exactly in line with how she was in CheerfulDays. This is the main conflict in her first event story, the fear that her fans wouldn't love her anymore if she stayed true to her actual character, and didn't act "perfect."

This belief gets affirmed by a mishap that happens in one of MMJ's livestreams, where Shizuku admits to putting miso soup in her container instead of the expected water, leading to an onslaught of confused and negative commenters — but one specific comment hit her the most: "this isn't Shizuku."

This encapsulates the way that Shizuku's feigned image has dominated the publics perception of her to the point where anything other than the flawless, perfect her is rejected in its entirety.

Airi compares her to a swan, which is accurate to her character. Swans look graceful and elegant, but under the surface — they're quickly paddling their feet in the water in order to swim, just like how Shizuku on a daily basis tries her hardest and practices 24/7 in order to keep up the image she's maintained for so long.

In the end, Shizuku's fans accept her for who she really is — a clumsy, airheaded yet kind and determined individual who tries her damn hardest ever single day.

Now — onto Shizuku's second focus, which centers around her insecurity and lack of confidence in herself.

MMJ makes a competition where they all design stage outfits for the group — with the winner getting their idea officially made by their fans.

Shizuku struggles with an outfit concept for the group, due to her lack of confidence in her own ideas from the trauma she has with a lack of self identity.

She eventually confides with MMJ Miku and remembers her first time in CheerfulDays preparing for a performance — where she wasn't confident at all despite the continuous practice she did prior.

But — after she officially gets introduced to her unit outfit, she gains enough confidence and the performance becomes a success — due to the support from her group mates prior to their conflict, and the outfit she was wearing — which essentially "transformed" her into a different person.

Shizuku finally gets motivated, and manages to make separate outfits for each member of MMJ aside from herself — each incorporating their differences while still looking unified.

The story ends with her wanting to spread the "magic" that was put on her when she wore the CheerfulDays outfit with the rest of MMJ, determined to aim for new heights together as a group.

We finally get to Shizuku's most recent focus, where she with the rest of MMJ are forced to confront CheerfulDays and resolve tension between the two groups.

When MMJ first get the sudden announcement of them holding a segment with CheerfulDays, she puts on a strong face in front of the group and says that she's fine with the situation.

However, Airi privately goes and asks her if she's really fine with the arrangement due to her rocky past with group, but Shizuku reassures her that she's fine — and has known for awhile that there was a possibility of the two groups encountering eachother sooner or later now that MMJ is officially entering the idol industry. Infact, she sees this as an opportunity to reconnect with her old idol group, and show them show much she's grown and changed since then.

Before the segment occurs — a flashback starts that explains CheerfulDays current attitude towards Shizuku. At first, they supported her, covering for her mistakes, which made Shizuku feel like she relied too much on the others as the center of the group and wanted to make up for that.

But — as time went on, she got scouted for more and more independent work due to her sheer popularity, to the point where she barely showed up for actual performances with the group. Conflict started occurring when Shizuku missed a theatre performance that was very important to the rest of the group for a shooting on the same day — despite the fact that she had the power to move the dates in advance.

This is when CheerfulDays started turning on her, frustrated at her lack of motivation as the center of the group, and how they essentially got reduced to Shizuku's background dancers. This culminated into them relentlessly bullying her for the prettiest of things, like her stage outfit being misplaced.

Now onto the actual segment with CheerfulDays and MMJ. The two groups talk about various different topics, before Arisa, the new center of the group brings up a question that wasn't in the script — Shizuku's drastic behavior shift from the one she showed in CheerfulDays.

Everyone in MMJ gets caught off guard with the question, Airi and Haruka calling out the malicious intent veiled with curiosity.

But in the end, Shizuku answers that she put on that "perfect" persona of hers due to her insecurity — which is simultaneously the truth and a lie at the same time, because while she lacked the confidence in herself — her managers pushed the image of a flawless person onto her, with them making scripts for her and the like. She answers this way as to absolve her former managers from any guilt in the situation.

She admits to the public that she troubled alot of people due to how poor she acted as a center, and formally apologizes on TV.

However — she also says that the her in CheerfulDays days and the her in mmj are the same person, and won't fault anyone that feels betrayed by her major personality shift. Despite those grievances, she asks for everyone to support the current her, as she'll try her best to spread hope to everyone in her own way — as a member of MMJ.

Everyone gets impressed by her response to the question, with Airi in particular admitting her admiration toward the idol — saying how her real self is much better than the one her managers came up with.

After the recording is over, Arisa goes up to MMJ privately — wanting to talk to Shizuku. She's met with hostility by Haruka and Airi before Shizuku steps in, intending on apologizing to Arisa.

She apologizes to the CheerfulDays center for something she said in the past — her wishing that someone else took the role as a center. Shizuku now recognizes that she took advantage of the position of power that many people yearn to someday have, and strives to do better as an idol, now being able to stand on her own without relying heavily on other people.

Her apology gets cut short by Arisa, who wishes her good luck in the idol industry — and bids her farewell. She doesn't reconcile with CheerfulDays, but she does manage to resolve tension in her relationship with Arisa — which may serve well in any future encounters between the two.

At the end of her third focus, Shizuku reflects upon the growth she's had between not even being able to speak without a script to now managing to properly confront her old group despite being caught by surprise. She desires to spread hope to all the people who supported her — regardless if it was her in CheerfulDays or MMJ. With that goal of hers cemented, the event ends.

One thing that all of Shizukus events have in common is the determination to stay true to herself despite her fears — from her recultancy from her first focus to her absolute confidence in her third focus. Shizuku has grown alot from the main story.

This analysis of her character focuses alot on her personal growth — but that's just one aspect of her character. There's many things to love about Shizuku, like her ability to emphasize with other people, her hardworking nature, the kindness she shows to everyone she comes across — and even her silly moments, like her struggle with phones, her absolutely horrible sense of direction, her short attention span, and much more.

I could ramble even more about how she tries to help people regardless of the results, like her attempts to help Haruka relax during his first focus. (I use he/him pronouns for haruka)

However, this is where I'm gonna end this analysis. Shizuku is an absolutely amazing character, and I'll be happy if other people get to appreciate her from reading this. Live laugh MMJ, that is all.

[spencersties]

Want You Back - S. R.

Gif is by @nerys2

A/N: I don't write angst very often but I actually had quite a bit of fun writing this one.

Content/Warnings: cheating, kissing, gen!neutral reader, pretty petty and pathetic spencer, angst (obviously)

Word count: 768

Masterlist | Navigation

it was Valentine's Day. you should have been enjoying yourself.

instead you had to deal with spencer making petty remarks towards you constantly, while you tried to enjoy a nice evening with your boyfriend.

you hadn't thought much of it when you decided to bring the person you were currently dating to one of rossi's dinner parties. it was a special day, after all. and you liked him. you really did.

it wasn't fair that spencer was acting like an absolute dick at the fact that you had moved on when he clearly hadn't.

you hadn't slept together in months. being friends with benefits with a coworker who you had a major crush on wasn’t a good idea, especially when he was as closed off as spencer. you had asked for more, had even wanted to start a meaningful relationship with him. he was the one that said no, clearly hurt by his previous romantic attachments.

despite the rejection you felt at the time, you didn't hold it against him. sure, it had hurt then, but you were fine now. perfectly content with the man currently holding your hand as he laughed with garcia. your friends liked him and he was good to you. there was absolutely no need for you to feel anything but happiness with him.

and yet...

you couldn't stop meeting spencer's eyes, filled with resentment and hurt and something you couldn't quiet place.

you'd had enough of this. he had no right to be angry or upset.

you excused yourself from the rest of the group, trying your best to subtly pull spencer aside along with you.

soon enough, the two of you were in a dimly lit spare bedroom at rossi's, the door firmly shut behind you.

"you have to stop." were the first words that came out of your mouth.

spencer looked at you with faux confusion, clearly trying to act naive before saying, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm not the one that put a stop to us, okay? you were. I wanted more. you didn't. I found someone else that could give me what I need."

spencer just stared at you, silent, so you continued.

"you need to stop the hateful quips. stop the longing looks. stop the overly flirtatious banter. you just need to stop. got it?"

he blinked at you a few times before sighing and running a hand through his hair.

taking that to mean that the conversation was over, you turned to the door to leave. spencer grabbed your wrist gently, stopping you from exiting the room. you looked at him. waiting for him to speak.

"I want you back." he said. why was your heart beating faster all of a sudden?

"don't say that. you can't say that. not anymore." god, this felt wrong.

he stepped closer to you, crowding your space and backing you against the door.

"I want you back." he repeated. "I need you back. I just- I just need you." he leaned in, kissing your lips gently. "I need you all the time."

you'd lost all ability to speak. you could have pretended that you wanted to stop him, but you truly didn't. you felt like you would die if he didn't keep going.

luckily for you, he did.

he kissed your check, your jaw, your neck. carefully, as though he was afraid that any sudden movements from him would send you running.

"I'll be whatever you want." he was whispering now. "we'll be whatever you want. just tell me what to do, and I'll do it."

his hands reached for you, one cupping your face, the other tangling itself in your hair.

"leave him. you know he won't ever be able to love you as much as I do."

"you don't love me." you whisper back, your voice trembling.

"I do. I do. I love you so much, I'd beg for you every day and every night. as much as you wanted, whenever you wanted, " he said your name and followed it with a "please." and another gentle kiss against your lips.

he kept pleading, leaving light kisses over any bare skin he could find.

how could you say no to him?

you finally let yourself touch him then. tugging lightly at his hair and meeting your mouth with his.

the kiss was slow and deep, and when you both finally pulled away it left you with swollen lips and glassy eyes.

you just looked at him for a few still moments before you said "Okay." and that seemed to be enough for him in that moment.

Request to be on my taglist

[sukifoof]

I was thinking about Asriel as the Royal Scientist, and I remember in one post you said in the tags, how you considered drawing him as one for your Asriel survives AU, before saying you can't imagine him holding down any job without freaking out

Now, I'm not asking you to draw him anyway, I'll be fine either way. It is just important context cuz that's what gave me my personal thoughts right now about him, and I wanted to spread them because I think they're optimistic in the end, if cliché and generic (warning, I'm really bad at sympathizing with other people, so I might be just, completely wrong about what I say next)

I have little doubt Asriel would be very lost at first about what he is going to do with his life now that The Barrier is gone. Typical confusion after exiting a time loop, compounded by the years of untouched trauma and other mental health issues. Maybe spiralling further as he may consider himself a burden for all those problems he can't handle on his own

He would try resuming being The Prince, go back to what he thinks people want of him, but it's not going to work, he distrusts himself too much after everything he has done. When he inevitably fails, he hits a new low. But eventually, perhaps with Frisk's encouragement, he finds it in himself to open up about it, talk to other people, seek help

Alphys, who in a very real sense is his creator (slightly more metaphorical in this AU, but she's still the one who woke him up from his coma), and one of the few people who know how he works, might be one of the first people that Asriel speaks to about his problems, feeling that she'd understand. They talk to each other about the regrets that they have, bonding over similar troubles, and maybe shared interests (bonding as friends. Alphys is faithful to her wife, and Asriel is on the aspec, so it doesn't go further)

At some point one of them might just naturally suggest that Asriel help out around the lab, and while he's helping, and they're talking with each other, Alphys realizes just how much knowledge about all sorts of things Asriel has, and one day she offers that he become a full-time assistant at her lab. This freaks him out, and in the moment he rejects it and runs away, which both of them later despair over, in a sense of "oh god I was to hard on him/her, now I destroyed our friendship, I'm the worst, I can't do anything right"

But eventually they talk to each other about it (encouraged by their friends) and they realize that neither is harboring any resentment towards the other, and they make amends. Asriel starts out working with her part-time, and while it's initially very scary for him, and he probably has several other freakouts along the way, I think Alphys, being prone to freakouts herself, would be more than understanding. Eventually he becomes her full-time assistant after all

Hopefully combined with therapy which he really, really should receive, he eventually starts feeling good about himself again, even if it takes years to get there. And he realizes, yes, this is the job he wants to do. He can help people without actually having to be there, with a much more manageable amount of responsibility to handle. He's finally happy, as the Assistant Royal* Scientist (* although at this point it is possible that Asgore and Toriel would abdicate, seeing as their son won't take over from them, it might just be easier to end the monarchist government right then and there)

Of course, while Asriel is immortal, Alphys is not, and as the decades pass, she will get older, weaker, less able to do her job. The day when she resigns from her post to let the (physically) younger Asriel become the next Royal Scientist will be a difficult one for both of them, and even more so when she finally turns to dust, although I hope that by this point he would be better equipped to handle the loss of those close to him. It will still hurt, but I hope with new experiences and skills he's learned over the years, he'll be able to deal with that pain, or the pain when his parents or his other friends die, better than he did with the pain of Chara's death

Frankly, not being seen as royalty anymore, especially by the younger generations who won't remember monarchist rule, he might find life easier as he's no longer so isolated as he was as a prince, no longer has to reach the same standards as before

The trauma, and other pain that follows, they will never fully leave him, but he's got a quite literal eternity to learn how to live with them and not let them control his life. And if mortals can do it, then I think he too can, over the course of several years, or even decades, figure it out. I think, as fucked up as he is, at the end of this nightmare road there is happiness waiting for him, however long it takes him to get there. I just want him to be happy goddammit. And I think that a 30-or-40-something Asriel will be happy

Thanks you for listening to my TED talk, and have a magical day

HI IVE BEEN MEANING TO ANSWER THIS FOR SO LONG CUZ ITS SO GOOD AND IN CHARACTER!!! u are so right for this i LOVE this i dont have much to add on cuz ur points are all so good. asriel has so many issues and i think he would probably feel a Bit Better if he was able to put his knowledge to use to help people and it might help him come to terms with death a little better..... anyway they are siblings and they occasionally bother each other. extremely kind mayor who took over after papyrus and local freak scientist who is seemingly some kind of sludge <3 i may draw more of this when i get the chance cuz the idea of these middle aged freaks is so funny to me i love them dearly

[thefanboyhub]

My laundry is on the floor right now and I decided right now was a good time to do some digging into one of the most interesting characters in KOTLC.

It's time to dissect Fitzroy Avery Vacker!

So we all know Mr. Ritz Cracker,

Mr. "We're Cognate's!"

Mr. Golden boy

Mr. You-get-the-damn-point!

Fitz was the Elf who found Sophie in the Forbidden Cities. He was the one who introduced her to his— their— world. He was the first person to see Sophie cry, first person in the Lost Cities to support her.

From reading the books we learn a lot about how Fitz grew up, and you might be saying "uh... no?" BUT HA! YOU FOOL! You cannot just simply read the words, you must read behind the meaning and watch a characters behavior to learn how they grew to be who they are! (It's why I love characters so much, there's so many ways to learn about them)

From context clues and how he behaved in the books we know he was the golden child. First kid to manifest at the tender age of 13, and lose his leaping bracelet early too, not to mention he was a telepath and was basically flawless in school. He took pride in it, like most kids do. But you see here, that's the problem. He never had someone to take him down his pedestal that his parents practically built for him (fucking Alden). He grew up being told he'd do great things, that he was a strong Elf, that he was better then anyone else. So naturally he started to believe it and act like it. He wasn't necessarily vicious either, but he didn't need to be; he always got what he wanted anyways.

I think he felt alone. I mean he reacted so viciously towards his brother Alvar after finding out he was a traitor— UNDERSTANDABLY SO BY THE WAY! But my confusion with this was how angry he was. But I thought about it a lot through my rereading of the series and I realized that he was so angry because he had loved, trusted, looked up to, and felt inferior to his older brother. Despite— No— Because he was treated so much better by Alden(bitch) and Della(ILoveYouWifey) Alvar gained resentment for his siblings, mostly Fitz.

There was a part of Fitz sports thing in book 8.5 KOTLC Unlocked where he talked about playing with Alvar. He said it's no fun playing base quest (I think) with him because he'd stay invisible the entire time. What this tells me is Alvar agreed to play the game but would dip out of his own jealousy and pettiness. Which takes me to my previous statement—

Fitz felt alone. The one thing he never got was a brother who actually liked and loved him. The one thing he had been patiently waiting for and hoping for since he was younger and treated like the golden boy was his older brother. But he never got it, instead he got a traitorous older brother who hated him so deeply he'd hurt his friends without a second thought.

In my opinion, Fitz's rage over his brother is reasonable. It's honestly so real and raw that I can't even say he's being idiotic. Especially considering what I just said.

BUT

His fatal flaw his his anger— or more technical — His tantrums.

Like I said before, he always got what he wanted, he was spoiled and treated like a little prince. So every single time he didn't get what he wanted, his anger would rise. His emotional intelligence has been stumped because he never had someone say no to him or been rejected for something. So he's confused and angry; "Why not!? This never happens to ME!" Type of mentality.

This also comes along with jealousy and the need to compete with others. So when Keefe started to show his affections for Sophie a lot more openly back in book 4 KOTLC Neverseen, specifically when they ended up in Alluveterre for protection that was provided by the black swan, he started to act jealous. He realized how Keefe felt and noticed something about how Sophie acted and he automatically felt the need to compete which is why in book 9 KOTLC Stellerluna he has Sophie on a pedestal like a prise in his subconscious. He doesn't see her like a lover or a crush, he sees her as a prise to win over, subconsciously though. Consciously he thinks it's a crush. He went from thinking of her as a sister to someone he wanted to date; that doesn't happen for no reason.

Moving on from the relationship drama aspect of this, we can talk about his outbursts when something goes wrong. He needs someone to blame. Always. And it's never himself. He needs someone to push all this fear and anger out on because he's not emotionally or mentally equipped to deal with it. It's a self-destructive flaw he posseses. Same with his jealousy.

Which is why I love his character! He actually has some pretty bad flaws! But he also recognized it and is attempting to fix it; what he doesn't realize is that it will take time and whatever he broke will most likely never be fixed again. Simple as that. It's sad and will probably hurt him a lot but I will help him grow.

In conclusion: Kill Alden and get Fitz into therapy :D

[princesspastel8]

Chapter 30

Third POV

There, Eboni stood, crying over her parents' ashes. They weren't buried, the family thought that would be too expensive. Why pay thousands on two dead people? Something stood out to the little girl. Oddly enough, no one seemed to grieve at their deaths like she is. Eboni seems to be the only one distraught, besides her grandpa.

The young child watches on, her family hosting a small memorial service. It wasn't grand nor a great sendoff that her parents deserved. They were just trying to get this over with. Everyone that wasn't a part of the family would spare Eboni this pitied look, which seems to anger her. She never experienced such anger, not knowing how to handle it - she results in just screaming.

The screams were cut short by her aunt, who gave her a look of annoyance. The pain that look caused was enough to shut Eboni up. After the memorial, a social worker came to take Eboni, placing her in her first foaster home. She was confused at first, questioning why her father's family wouldn't take her in - why her aunt wouldn't take her in.

Those questions would fill her mind consistently during her first years with her foster family. The endless abuse causes those feelings of being unwanted to fester into anger - to rage. Her social worker didn't take much care of Eboni's case, placing her in random homes without holding detailed background checks.

It's no wonder this child grew to be a resentful, angry teen with many issues.

Tears flow down her cheeks, not bothering to wipe them away as she told her story to Jeff. She should be used to this by now. She thought she'd be used to her family rejecting her after her parents' death. She thought she forgave her parents for leaving without her.

"I wanted to die with them. To be with them. It wasn't fair - they weren't fair. Why didn't I die? I know I was supposed to... but why didn't I?" She questions, not excepting an answer.

Jeff's never good at comforting others. He never had to. He lives in a mansion full of serial killers - sympathy and empathy are never an option. But of course, Eboni is an exception. He turns her head, using his thumbs to wipe her tears.

"The universe has a sick sense of humor. Like its drawing from a hat at random to choose who's life to fuck with." The smiling killer sighs.

"It's not fair..", she pouts, looking up at him. "....what about you?" She asks hesitantly, playing with her fingers nervously.

He raised a brow, tilting his head. "What about me?"

Eboni is a curious girl. She's done her research on Jeff, but she always wanted to hear his version of the events that took place within his life. What made him like this?

"I...I wanna hear it from you..what happened to you.."

He scoffs, looking away. He moves his arms from around her, leaning his head against the head broad on the bed. The killer moves his hands to his face, rubbing it down in irritation. The thought of his past angers him. It's a trigger that he doesn't like to talk about. He looks at Eboni through his fingers, her honey brown doe eyes holding so much curiosity. How can he say no to her with eyes like that?

"....fuck - you bitch." He grumbles, crossing his arms over his chest.

She tiles her head, honestly confused. "What did I-"

"Shut up and listen-" he said, his tone holding no room for discussion.

Eboni turns her body a bit, resting her cheek against his chest as she looks up at him- giving the killer her undivided attention. Jeff rolls his eyes, flicking Eboni's forehead.

"...where do I even start?" He questions aloud. Eboni didn't answer since the killer ordered her to shut up.

"My family moved consistently. We never had a stable living situation. We would move from town to town with each new job my dad got. My mom was always anxious while my dad never gave a shit- always thinking the shit me and liu went through was for attention."

Eboni can feel his body begin to tense, so the teen moves to lay her hand over his own that rest against her waist.

"Liu and I weren't born...normal. I have albinism, and Liu...he just always had this weird vibe around him. Turns out the fucker has multiple personalities, Sully being the main one in charge. Our parents never found out until after that incident with those gang members." Jeff couldn't help the laugh slipping through his lips. "The bullying...all those fights- they aaaaaalways thought it was me having fits! I never started shit! Everywhere we went, the bullying never stopped. I always had to defend Liu."

Eboni turns around, moving onto her knees. At this point, she can tell that Jeff is becoming a rambling mess. Most of what he said makes sense, but his sentences always jump from one event to the next without adding details.

"Then those gang fuckers. That Australian bitch did this to me!" He shouts, pointing at his smile then his leathery skin. "All I did was steal a knife, and they did this! But its fine- it's perfect! You know, my dad called me a monster, and he was right- so I killed him first. Mom tried to call the cops- so I killed her too. Then Liu...he came home. I...didn't want to kill him, but I knew how attached he was to mom. It would've been best that he died with them - save him from his own issues, save him from becoming just like me! Oh- but I fucked up since he's still out there alive and well!"

Eboni faces Jeff, looking down at his hands that are now laying on her lap. She notices the slit of each wrist. She reaches to caress them with her thumbs, making Jeff flinch. The killer harshly grabs Eboni's face with both hands, tightening his grip.

"What? Think I did this shit to myself to!? Think I did it for attention!? Huh? ANSWER ME!" he shouts in her face, crazed eyes scanning for any ounce of doubt or pity - but Eboni doesn't flinch.

In the time she's known Jeff, the killer never shows any signs of being suicidal. He always seems ready to die but never the one to take his own life willingly. He's about living life to the fullest and doing what you want. How could he do that if he was suicidal?

"You were a high school kid with albinism. I'm sure you've gotten enough unwanted attention." She said calmly despite the harsh grip he still has on her face. She glances up at his hair, noticing his blood roots starting to show. "Blonde hair and red eyes. I'm sure you know that I relate to you in a way. When I go home, I'll get more hair dye and fix your roots for you - is that ok?" She asks with a smile, reaching to run her fingers through his hair.

Jeff is speechless. He finds himself leaning into her touch, closing his eyes at the feeling. When did he become so touch deprived? Granted, he's never been a fan of people touching him & colliding him. At this thought, he grabs her wrist, pulling her hand away from his hair. He stares at her for a moment, sighing.

"Turn around. Sit on her ass and open your legs." He orders dryly the look in his eyes dull.

Eboni pouts, a little concern but does as told. She gasps, feeling one hand go down into her shorts as the other goes up her shirt. The teen squirms, trying to break away from the killer's hold.

"Sit. Still." He warns, fingers tracing over her slit while the other grips her breast. "You were eight...I was seventeen. Seven years apart, huh?" He grins, slipping one finger into her cunt.

Eboni whines, gripping the bedsheets. "Wh-wh- Ah!...h..how old- uhnn~"

"Getting yourself tangled with an older man. I'm Twenty five princess - what a way to embrace your daddy issues - huh?" He teases.

Jeff adds another fingers, thrusting them as he curls them - his thumb rubbing against her clit. Eboni melts, her back arching off his chest. She never bothered to ask his age. The teen didn't care, she's eighteen after all. But the thought of belonging to someone with a wide age difference is just so appealing to her - so hot.

"Look at me." The killer commands.

Eboni does as told, meeting with his sapphire colored eyes. He grins, leaning down to lick her lips. "How funny would it be if anyone walks in on us? EJ didn't lock the door."

"J-Jeff...I- ahh!" Eboni moans loudly from the killer, pitching her sensitive bud. She bites her bottom lip, struggling to keep her sounds at bay.

He stops moving his fingers, giving the girl a sly grin. "No princess. You can't stay quiet just because the door isn't locked. So what if someone walks in? Nothing wrong with giving them a show. So open that mouth and beg for Daddy to keep going."

Eboni doesn't mind showing off any form of art the killer would make on her body. She doesn't mind becoming a complete mess in front of him, but in front of others? That's a different level of shameless the teen has no idea would get her off this much.

"Please...please daddy I wanna cum.." she begs, wiggling her hips to get his fingers to move.

"Kiss me, and I might change my mind."

Eboni listens, giving the killer shy kitten kisses, which irks him. He sighs, moving the hand from her breast to grip her jaw - making her lips pucker up.

"When I say kiss me I mean kiss me like your fucking life depends on it - bitch. You can do waaay better than that yeah? Show me how badly you want your reward." He challenges.

Eboni moves further onto him, opening her legs further as their lips lock onto each other. This time, she kisses with such passion and force that it takes the killer a little by surpise - but he enjoys it, drowning in the feeling of her roughness.

He picks up the pace, curling and twisting his fingers against her walls until he reaches her g-spot. Brushing against it causes the girl to gasp, her body tensing as she pulls away from their kiss - spit lacing their lips.

Jeff adds a third finger, thrusting them deep inside as he goes back to toying with her breast. He grins at the breathless look on Eboni's face as he repeatedly brushes against her g-spot.

"Daddy! Daddy, I'm gonna - uhnnn!"

"Go ahead, princess."

Once given permission, she cums all over his hand - toes curling and eyes rolling at the feeling of reaching her high. It felt like forever since the last time they've shared a moment like this.

Unfortunately, the moment is cut short by the sound of the infirmary door opening. Jeff is quick to throw the blankets over them, his expression turning blank to hide what just took place. Eboni, however, looks modified and embarrassed, her cheeks taking a rosy red tent - the look almost making Jeff laugh.

EJ raises a brow but doesn't question them. "The operator said you can go home today after your check up- Jeff will take you, of course."

"Fucking finally..." Jeff said, his fingers still deep inside of Eboni.

Eboni remains quiet, biting her lips. She looks up at Jeff, her eyes pleading with him to pull them out - will he comply? Of course not. Instead he begins moving his fingers again, the blanket muffling the sound of her cum leaking from her cunt.

She gasps, quickly placing her trembling hands over her mouth. EJ glances over but shrugs as he grabs the tools needed for her check-up. Jeff grins, knowing that EJ is fully aware of what's going on but chooses to play dumb for Eboni's sake. The cannibal checks the teen's eyes, noticing how dilated they are.

"Open her mouth, and stick your tongue out, please." EJ asks kindly.

Jeff stops moving his fingers, giving Eboni a knowing look as she moves her hands onto her lap. EJ flashes his flashlight into her mouth, nodding his head. Just as he finishes, Jeff quickly moves his fingers again, causing a loud moan to slip through her lips.

Throwing her hands over her mouth, she gives the smiling killer the side eye while he smiles wickedly at her. EJ once again chooses not to respond to what's happening. The eyeless killer runs a few more tests - Jeff continues to mercilessly torment the girl with his fingers.

"Alright. Her ribs are healed, just a bit of bruising. Her ankle is sprained, so she'll have to wear a cast but doesn't need crutches. Anyways, you two are good to go." He said as he walks towards the door. He places his hand on the door handle, raising his mask as he glances back at the two with a wide grin on his face. "Jeff, you're changing those sheets when you get back. And Eboni, slenderman said you're welcome here anytime - just make sure you're not followed." He chuckles, leaving the room.

"J-Jeff, that was f-fucking embarrassing - oh shit I-I think I'm gonna~"

The smiling killer cackles, leaving a trail of kisses down her neck. "But it was hot, wasn't it? I know you saw the tent in his pants - he sure did enjoy it, and so did you, getting this wet over someone watching you. Fuck you're a nasty little whore, go ahead and cum for me."

Eboni does as told, moaning his name loudly as her legs begin to shake. She whimpers, looking up at him. "S-So...so embarrassing."

"Stop your whining and get cleaned up. You can still walk to the bathroom." He laughs, patting her cheek before getting off the bed.

He looks at his hand, grinning at Eboni as he begins to lick his hand clean. "Fuck...why the hell do you always taste so good?"

Eboni blushes heavily, moving to stand quickly, though she wobbles a bit. "No idea! I'll be ready in ten!" She quickly said while rushing to the bathroom.

It doesn't take her long since she's eager to lay down in her bed. Eboni walks out of the bathroom, putting her shorts back on. Jeff helps put the cast on her foot and carefully makes sure her hand is wrapped and cleaned properly. He lowers himself down so the girl can hop onto his back.

Jeff carries the girl out of the infirmary, ignoring the surpise eyes from his fellow proxies. Once in the living room, BEN notices the two and waves to Eboni.

"See ya' later you cheater!"

Eboni grins, flipping him off, making Jeff laugh. The walk through the forest is rather short, neither of them sparking conversation - just enjoying the calm silence around them. Once at her home, the killer helps the teen climb up to her window, Jeff following behind her - grinning at the view of her ass.

Eboni pushes her window open, falling inside with a 'thud'. She giggles at herself, standing back up. Jeff witnessed the whole thing, his heart getting that fluttering feeling again.

"You're so dumb its cute - come here."

Eboni smiles, moving towards him with hast. Jeff closes the window before wrapping his arms around her waist and moves to kiss her deeply, forcing his tongue into her mouth. Both melt at the feeling. They part for just a second to strip out of their clothes- being left in only their undergarments.

The killer picks Eboni up, gripping her by her ass - moving towards her bed. He slames her down, breaking the kiss again while spreading her legs apart. "Damn I'm so horny - when was the last time I fucked your brains out?"

"I-I don't know~" she whimpers, feeling the killer grind against her as he begins to kiss down her throat and chest.

That's when Eboni's room is suddenly filled with light, three shocked faces staring back at the two in pure disbelief. Jeff notices the brightness filling Eboni's room, but that isn't enough to stop him. He starts pulling his boxers down while trying to yank the teen's shorts off ....which earns a knee to his groin, making him fall off her bed.

[sneezemonster15]

why is it that when the panel of sasuke’s family is shown after he reject sakura’s love confession it means she “reminds him of the love of his family” and loves her endlessly but when that same panel is used in VOTE1 and after VOTE2 sasuke says naruto reminds him of the love from his family… it’s because naruto is his brother? other than delusional SS hypocrisy LOL

Like I said, SS are foolish hormone filled bags of mush who conveniently skip or misinterpret anything that doesn't work in their ship's favor.

Let's take a look at these moments.

At this point of time, Naruto has already processed, that Sasuke is trying to actually kill him. He has already said - Can you kill me calmly, Sasuke?

He has already drawn from Kyuubi's chakra (not to be confused with Kyuubi chakra cloak), he has already introspected about his repressed feelings for Sasuke.

He has already tried to process Sasuke's words when he told him that Naruto was his closest friend. Naruto has already thought of those moments that solidified his feelings for Sasuke during the course of team seven's missions, he has already been reminded of the moment when Sasuke finally acknowledged his strength during the Chuunin exams and told Naruto he wanted to fight him. Naruto has already remembered how it made him so happy to be finally acknowledged by Sasuke, something that he had craved for a long time, as long as he knew him. Naruto thinks about how even though he didn't want to admit it to himself given his stubbornness, but he always looked up to Sasuke and wanted to be like him, reach his level, because he admired him so much. He wanted to befriend him but seeing how they were at such different levels, Sasuke being so popular and skilled, and Naruto being the outsider, the loser, Naruto was dejected but him being him, he simply redirected his energies at being just like him, and made Sasuke his rival. He trained and worked hard and finally reached a point where Sasuke started to take him seriously and then at Chuunin exams, acknowledged him. Naruto knows that Sasuke is not the type of person who would do or say things just for the heck of it. Naruto was under the impression, this whole time, that Sasuke really valued him, cared for him, thought of him as important. So Naruto is obviously devastated that Sasuke would try to kill him. Without hesitation. Naruto couldn't believe that Sasuke would try to kill him, even if he were under darkness.

Sasuke is operating on pure resentment and jealousy towards Naruto at this point. He is reminded of how Itachi wasn't even thinking of Sasuke when he arrived with Kisame to retrieve Naruto, the jinchuuriki. And then the fact that Naruto has gotten even stronger than Sasuke, which is underlined with the hospital roof fight, acts like salt over Sasuke's wounds created by Itachi.

In vote 1, Naruto keeps telling Sasuke that he won't let Sasuke to go over to Orochimaru because Naruto knows Oro's intentions are evil and he wants to take over Sasuke's body. Sasuke is frustrated with Naruto because Naruto doesn't understand what led Sasuke to his decision to go to Oro in the first place. Btw, this was all already envisioned by Oro, who knew Sasuke's goals and motivations, and he knew Sasuke would eventually come to him for more power. Sasuke was vulnerable and Oro did take advantage of that.

So at this point where Naruto is just hell bent upon not letting Sasuke leave, even if he had to break every bone in his body to stop him, Sasuke explodes with frustration and anger. So he remembers his family, because that is the root of it all. His family and his clan are the reasons why Sasuke was so vulnerable in the first place, they are the reason why he wants to get strong, to avenge them, to punish the person, Itachi, who killed them. And so after the family panel, we see this.

After which Naruto relents and talks about how even if he doesn't know how exactly it feels to lose one's family, he does know something about how it feels to have a family for a person who never had one. He considered Iruka to be his father because Iruka cared for Naruto how Naruto saw other parents caring for their kids. So he projected that on Iruka. And with Sasuke, he projected the idea of having a brother on Sasuke because that's what he thought brothers were like, playing, fighting, teasing each other, getting into trouble together, supporting each other, heh. Sasuke is puzzled because he thinks Naruto's effort in trying to bring Sasuke back is disproportionate with how Naruto acts around him. Which leads to Naruto telling Sasuke, that for Naruto, Sasuke is part of his FAMILY. That he finally was able to make. Someone who was never given one.

The same reason that leads Sasuke to go to such lengths to get strong (even if it means killing Naruto and abandoning Konoha and going to Oro who certainly has evil intentions that Sasuke already knows of) is the reason why Naruto won't let Sasuke go.

And this finally moves Sasuke emotionally to such an extent that he awakens his third tomoe.

Family is the crux of Naruto finally admitting what Sasuke means to him in words that he never admitted to himself before this moment. And family is the crux for Sasuke who is trying to understand why Naruto is going to such an extent to bring him back, when Naruto doesn't really understand why Sasuke is trying to leave. Family. Lack of it for Naruto and loss of it for Sasuke.

Naruto's focus is on the present and future because he finally has a family of which Sasuke is a part, the other being Iruka. And Sasuke's focus is on the past because he had a family to begin with and he wants to get justice for what happened to his family. That's why he says that his dreams are in the past.

In vote 2, the battle has already taken place and Naruto has already confessed to Sasuke (That he hurts beyond belief when he sees Sasuke get messed up carrying those heavy burdens of his) and Sasuke is taken aback by Naruto's admission which then leads to him thinking of his family wherein the emphasis is entirely fixed on the origin of his feelings for Naruto.

I don't really think it needs to be spelled out, it's pretty self evident, but SS are not so bright. The context is about how Sasuke is finally admitting to himself in so many words what he felt for Naruto from the start. Before this, we didn't really get to see Sasuke's inner thoughts about Naruto like this. Kishimoto had kept it for the end, so as to build intrigue and mystery around Sasuke's character because he is inspired by the bishounen archetype that is typically characterized to be mysterious. It's part of his allure. Sasuke feels very tender for Naruto and he always has, he loves him, which was the entire reason why he wanted to kill him off.

Here the context was that killing his closest friend would have given him access to Mangekyou Sharingan, as Itachi had instructed him. But in the end, he decides not to. He has a perfect opening but he didn't use it. The reason is simple. If getting strong through achieving mangekyou sharingan requires him to kill his most precious, his closest friend, then he would rather not follow in Itachi's footsteps. He would devise his own methods and he would do it without killing Naruto.

But when Sasuke saw Naruto trying to get attention from people, the way Sasuke tried to, from his own brother, the way Naruto would try and connect with people, someone who was as lonely as Sasuke was at that point, Sasuke started to relate with him. His feelings started to resonate with Naruto's. Their backgrounds might have been different but all it takes is that spark, doesn't it? That point of intersection where you feel connected with someone? That point that makes you feel vulnerable? A certain kindredness? Humans are emotional beings at their core. Sasuke and Naruto were kids who were starved of love. They couldn't relate with anyone else around them. They couldn't talk about their feelings, and it took them a long time to even find the words to articulate them, to even cross that barrier of denial.

Sasuke admits he felt warm and fuzzy looking at Naruto because here was Naruto, striving for a connection, a bond, that Sasuke once had but had lost, and it made him think of his family. What is this manga about if not about human bonds in the midst of strife? Human ethos and the desire to connect? Naruto and Sasuke's bond being the most elusive type of bond. Most desirable. Rare.

Sasuke considered it a weakness because he knew from experience that connection by nature is double edged. The more you experience love, the more you experience grief when it's lost. It's also true vice versa. The stronger a connection is, the more one suffers at the loss of it. That's why people build defence mechanisms and develop preservation techniques as they grow old. To protect themselves from things that have the potential to hurt them.

Being with Naruto and team seven, Sasuke, a child deeply missing his family, started to heal. The only cure to the pain of a broken heart is love. Like Yashamaru tells Gaara. One cannot fix one's own hurt. You need another person to do it for you. There's just no way around it. Emotional rehabilitation happens when one experiences love and care from another person. Trauma experienced at a formative stage of one's life defines a person in a very crucial way. Disconnect is the core of traumatization. Trauma is not only about what happened to a person but also what didn't happen. What was ignored, denied and not nurtured. When basic emotional needs such as safety, connection and authenticity aren't met, one tenses and disconnects as a survival strategy. For Naruto, it resulted in a destructive behaviour and he got his break when Iruka cared for him to the extent of putting his own life in danger, hence healing Naruto to the extent that his behaviour changed. For Sasuke, he found his emotional needs being met in Naruto and team seven, so he started to recover a bit. But then Itachi visited and it all went to hell, and Sasuke regressed. But Naruto gave him the inspiration and care he required in order to find comfort and emotional support that he had once felt with his family. So he is reminded of his family looking at Naruto. So he felt happy when Naruto was happy. And he hurt when Naruto hurt. Isn't that the meaning of true connection? This intimacy? Oneness?

Now to come to Sakura.

Let me just say it right off the bat that if you want to know what Sakura is truly like, listen to what Kakashi says about her. And invert it. That's what Sakura is actually like. The exact opposite of what Kakashi thinks about her lol. No seriously. Kakashi is dumb like that. More on it later.

He tells Sasuke, who was just so annoyed with her self absorbed ramblings and suspected she would pointlessly interfere in his business with Naruto, that Sakura was not trying to make him hers (LOLOL), and that she only wanted to save him, she feels for him because she suffers from loving him. Kishi, without fail, treats Sakura's character like this, like I have written in other posts. He would make several characters, Kakashi especially, to say things about Sakura that simply defy what Kishi shows Sakura 'doing'. Storytelling is about show, not tell.

Consider - If a hero is supposed to be super powerful and an awesome leader and the writer shows supporting characters admire him for it, but then establishes the hero getting defeated over and over again, with unsuccessful strikes and worse strategies, what would happen? What impression would it create in the audience's mind? It would certainly cancel out the impression that the hero is strong or clever or a good leader, won't it?

Narrative and visual language are intuitive by nature. Always. That's how stories are written. What are stories but intricately designed psychological manipulation? A story works on the principle of suspension of disbelief where a talented creator would create such a universe and a narrative that it wouldn't matter if it's fantasy or sci fi, not only the reader would find it immersive but would also relate to the characters and the story, resonate with them and as a result, get really invested. That's how a reader would enjoy a story. What is shown and how it's shown is an inherent building block of this suspension of disbelief which is, without a doubt, required for the reader to interpret and correctly understand a character in a given narrative. So what does Kishi do with Sakura (and Hinata but that goes without saying) in this regard? He subverts it. How? Show don't tell right? But Kishi? With Sakura, he tells. But shows the exact opposite. Lol. He tells, aka, makes several characters 'say' positive things about Sakura, but then right in the next panel, or next page, or the next chapter, or three chapters down, makes her do something exactly the opposite of it. Lol. It's true. He does it so fucking consistently but so shrewdly, that most fans aren't able to clock it. This is why so many fans hate her character. Because they are so disappointed in her. All credit to Kishi. This is ALL Kishi's doing. That clever fox!! Lol. If you were irritated/frustrated with her, it's because Kishi wanted you to. It's not coincidental or accidental. Nothing is. It's all psychological manipulation. He understands perception very well, any creator in the written/visual/audio-visual field is literally taught to manipulate the reader/viewer. That's why you like film makers like Nolan or David Fincher or Hitchcock or Tarkovsky. Because they know how to manipulate the viewer, as they understand the concept of perception so well. So they will use narrative/literary/audio-visual tools and tricks to manipulate you. This is all textbook btw. If you go to film schools, that's what they would teach you there. Deconstruct any film by a good film maker and you can tell exactly why and where a moment hit you hard or affected you. Always, always ask - Why?

And soon you will understand the How of it.

The 'why' of it is based on the effect of a certain moment or moments on the reader. With Sakura, the effect on one's mind (if one is truly following the story for the story's sake and not shipping) is always irritation, frustration, dissatisfaction, and disappointment. Because barring a couple of moments, she always ends up ruining the heightened expectations, that Kishi deliberately builds up with such effort, with some anti climactic action that Kishi makes her perform at the last moment.

Subversion. It's not only that which happens in a narrative, but also what doesn't happen in the narrative (something that the plot was building towards) that affects the reader/viewer and forms their impression of a character.

Anyway. So here, you see Kakashi failing to see Sakura's faults, which he does very consistently (don't even consider that Kishi was doing it unintentionally lol, it is testament to Kishi's talent as a writer that he does it not only consistently but so cleverly, that most fans aren't even able to tell how it happened but it does happen) and tell Sasuke that Sakura suffers from loving Sasuke. So when Sasuke says - "Perhaps those are ties of a failed past", he means to say the same thing that has been established before.

That Sakura 'suffers' because she is still hanging on to the past. A past where Sasuke still cared for team seven. And Sakura is also shown to consider a Sasuke from the past, where she thought he cared for her.

Of course, Sakura also has a selective memory because she only remembers what she wants to remember and forgets the rest, and if not forget, certainly dismisses it. Narcissism works like that. Anything that doesn't speak in a narcissist's favor will be dismissed/forgotten/repressed by the narcissist. It's important for that to happen so they can keep believing in what they want without question or introspection. If you don't think about it, it's not there. Lol. Sakura was obviously working from the memory of some past moments where Sasuke showed consideration for her. She obviously forgot that in the same scene, Sasuke also mocked her for her inability to change and for being the same shallow person she always was, who hadn't changed at all from when she had insulted Naruto for being an orphan, when Sasuke had mocked her the first time. Sasuke knows that she is a person who wouldn't change. I think he hoped, when team seven was still working together, that Sakura would change and become a better person, but then she confesses to Sasuke (when he is leaving Konoha) by making it ALL about herself while totally erasing Sasuke's own concerns. Which makes him say - Heh, I knew it. You will never change.

And she doesn't.

Anyway, coming back, Sasuke thinks of his family because what Kakashi says to him reminds him of his own family and how ties of the past can make you suffer. Like how Sasuke suffered.

Just like how Sakura 'suffers' (lol, maybe that's why she decided to kill him in Kage arc but then obviously couldn't do it) because she can only remember the Sasuke who once cared. Yes, it's true that she very conveniently ignores all the other moments that went along with that moment but lol, it's Sakura. She was written as self absorbed, imperceptive and shallow so it is totally in character for her. Even here, she makes the confession all about her, as if Sasuke would care. She wants to go to the old days, just like how Kakashi thinks that everything is back to how it was in the old days in chapter 699, when so many things actually have changed. Sasuke has changed, he is more mature, more knowledgeable, more aware of his reality. Naruto has changed, he is not the same person, emotionally. He has met his parents, he has saved the world, he has resolved to make the world a better place, he has understood the vicious cycle of love and loss and hatred. Nothing is the way it was. Which is highlighted even more in Gaiden and Boruto. Naruto and Sasuke are just the husk of the people they once were. But both Kakashi and Sakura had to be imperceptive, characterization wise, because if they were more perceptive, they probably would have not ignored how Sasuke and Naruto really felt for each other, Sakura would have treated Naruto and Sasuke much better, and Kakashi would have been more perceptive of Sakura's true nature, and empathetic towards Sasuke, given he knows the truth of Uchiha massacre. Like it would have been a narrative problem if Kakashi and Sakura were written to be emotionally perceptive people. A narrative at the end of the day, has to be believable, or else the psychological manipulation wouldn't work.

So yeah. These are the different contexts to these different moments where Sasuke thinks of his family.

SS would benefit a lot if they just paid attention to the story and let their intuition do its job. But I think their intuition was sacrificed at the altar of pink cotton candy girlboss Sakura that Sasuke the hot and popular boy 'loves' so much. Lol.

[mari-lair]

this is my thought on your 'pink and blue' fic.

omg it was so good (//∇//)\, you have me crack up at "what are we?" and Kou being dense at possible answer "people"?? lmao and Mitsuba being lovesick fool too. And terukaneaoi, their dynamic didnt show much in this fic but i know it gonna be great, having Teru and Aoi being guideless and Akane just like "oh sh*t I love someone other than Aoi??" moment. I do have a question that what happened after that with terukaneaoi tho… but consider the fic is very old so i dont wanna push you to answer. Just wanna say, this mitsukou verry good! (sorry my english isn’t good)

Thank you, I’m glad you liked the draft! Mitsukou is so funny, I’m happy you like my take on them :D

Unfortunately, I do not remember what I had planned for the terukaneaoi situation, when I got too invested I just started a new fic with them as the focus, but I got some background information of their current situation that might interest you (?) cause what Mitsuba catches in his narration is… Not that much. .

Akane loves Aoi since they were five but the more they grow up the less she believe him, having seen soulmates fight but never be unhappy together, certain once Akane met his other half he’ll abandon her.

Akane does his best to show her otherwise but Aoi is convinced she is unlovable: Even the universe couldn’t find someone for her after all, and despite her mom’s valiant attempt to seek love without being given a soulmate, her dad abandoned them the second he met his destined other half: Truly being guideless is a bad omen.

Still, she selfishly hopes Akane will be one of the 20% of the population that never met their soulmates, and feeling bitter by her own wishes.

Akane starts seeing color when he sees Teru and he rejects him on the spot, much to Teru’s confusion (Akane assumed he only started seeing colors when they walked past each other in the hallway, but in Teru’s perspective, a half-human went “I can’t love you. I’m sorry.” and moved along with no elaboration.)

Teru used to believe he have a soulmate when he was a child, liking the idea that someone will “love you for who you are and be there for you, just as you’ll be there for them.” but after he learned supernaturals are connected to the idea of soulmates he was convinced his family doesn’t have it. The occasional fans that tried to get close to him by claiming they are his soulmate made Teru’s lack of faith turn into resentment.

Akane’s situation impresses Teru, cause he is very honest, he admits that Aoi isn’t his soulmate, and when asked about his soulmate he keeps dismissing it “The only good thing about my soulmate is that he let me see Aoi's colors, purple is more beautiful than anything I could imagine.”

Aoi learns Teru is Akane’s soulmate before Teru, having implied in a conversation that Akane seems to be able to see colors now and getting a blunt answer. She doesn’t like Teru at first, but feels a strange connection at the knowledge he is guideless like her, with no idea Akane is his soulmate.

Akane assumes part of Teru’s aggression comes from being rejected since everyone put soulmates on pedestals and it must hurt to have such a 'wonderful fated meeting' ruined, so he tries to talk about it. Unfortunately, just implying they are soulmates make Teru look at him like he has never seen him before, almost betrayed, and act far more violently. Akane is convinced he is a sadistic demon.

Over time, Teru realizes Akane would only claim to be his soulmate if it was true, so he has much to think about, especially after he notices Akane keeps coming to the student council despite him not hiding his less pleasant side, not quite 'loving' him, but at least accepting him for who he is.

He isn’t nicer to Akane after he learns this, not exactly, but he gets a bit awkward at times, cause "He is my soulmate! My family do have it!! :D” and “I was rejected on sight” are two big realizations to have at the same time.

Teru is mostly resigned, it doesn’t really matter who the universe wants him to be with, not when Akane is so dedicated to Aoi.

I do remember there would be an event that made Teru and Akane closer, and this time able to properly talk about their situation, but I forgot what the event is. And when the 'oh shit i like someone that isn't aoi' moment hit Akane, he would be in denial af.

[baladric]

Oh bookstore maia my beloved <3 Oughh i knew you'd have some cool ideas about gods and faith and maz! I like to think they're related and come from similar sources but there's key differences- being a maza is having the skill and ability to consciously use and manipulate maz, which is like energy thats a product of the gods or whatever, and actively control and influence it, whereas with people like thara and clerics etc it's more like the gods work through them? Like they're more similar to a conduit and have the unique ability to act like a focal point for maz, they can't exert control over it in the way maza can and instead thara is more similar to a transformer in a circuit bridging the gap between mortals and the gods. Maz exists externally from the user and casting spells vs being able to witness for the dead are just different interactions with and reactions to maz. But if that's the case I'm not sure how the faith aspect of religion would come into it or play a significant role this is so interesting and confusing alsksjdj. And the fact thara can talk to the dead seems to suggest some type of spirit/soul does exist so I like to think cala is literally the protector of maia's mind and actual soul as maz can be used to interact with the soul and potentially harm it.

I was literally just thinking about this the other day too like the life of a priest or cleric sounds intense so I wonder how all these people in religious roles are chosen? Thara obviously enjoys his work and his relationship with his god but do all people with the ability to witness willingly join the prelacy? Are there some people out there with the skill who reject the life of a priest and resent being "chosen" by god and have to go into hiding to avoid being forced to serve the gods? Or would the gods not gift someone with their abilities if they weren't already willing in some way?

Also that post about thara and the bridge and evru oof if you wrote that I think it would emotionally destroy me in the best way, I can already feel thara's guilt and grief multiplying and nearly consuming him if it weren't for iana. What would iana think of evru if they ever got the chance to talk? Also would The Bridge mean maia would be able to speak with his mother once more??? Whew sorry that's so long, tumblr taking away the ask character limit was really rhe best/worst thing to happen to me

anon i am cradling your face in my hands and pressing a tender kiss to your gentle forehead, thank you for this GIFT

you crystallized all of this so eloquently into a really cohesive concept space?? maz and clerical powers w a relationship of Conducting v Channeling, one's a conduit and the other is a catalyst—i love this!!! and yeah, then there's that exact problem of "what exactly does this mean for religion as a fact???" the rabbit hole it tumbles you down is WILD (and Excellent)

i bet there are plenty of ppl who manifest clerical powers and either consciously reject the call, or like. possibly don't even notice? we have the example of tomasaran in grief of stones just never having encountered a dead body with the right proximity to witness for it, and if we extrapolate things out like—there's probably a farmer somewhere with the greenest thumb in the principality who chalks it up to understanding seed-starting and soil compositions, when actually he's got orshan moving through him (as well as knowing those things), or some kid in the flatlands of thu-istandaär who dreams of flying every single night, but doesn't have a roof strong enough to climb onto or a tree tall enough to properly scale to find out that when she stumbles off the edge in a moment of kid-shaped clumsiness, she never hits the ground as hard as she's supposed to, bc she's got salezheio bearing her up. and then there are 100% people who accidentally witness for a dead loved one, realize what happened and then run full-tilt in the opposite direction of anyone even vaguely ulis-oriented, bc! that's Scary!!! what!!! no!!!!! i just want to make sure the roan horse foals right and get my son to his majority!!!!!!

my take on the gods in this universe is they're for real out there, and they do gift people with powers, but i think their brand of godhood is closer to a force of nature than like the weirdly chummy interactive shit some people attribute to greek gods, or really anything involving direct pronouncement or volition. i feel like gifts are given out in sort of an act of sympathetic resonance—which, if you're not a musician, is a thing that happens where you play one note and the other strings of your piano or guitar resonate to match that note but in musical fifths and octaves, all by themselves—meaning a new soul comes onto the scene and something in it resonates with the tune a specific god is putting into the aether, and lo, a bond that sends a gift trickling down to that soul. spiritual alignments etc etc idk this metaphor escaped me at the end, i am sleepy

god im frankly sort of annoyed now that i hadn't really Thought about this shit before, but i guess i needed the in-roads in the form of someone poking me about it—so THANK You for that augh!!!!!

and listen, my internal super undeveloped take on evru is that he frankly kind of SUCKED ;alskdjfalw;df rip to him, things were terrible over there, i think he really truly did love thara etc etc and was doing his best, but in my head he's a wet blanket in the most frustratingly pass-agg way. consequently, i think iäna pel-thenhior would eat him for breakfast (not in a sexy way) and then complain that he was in no way nourishing and hunt down a full fuckin oslov.

and the bridge, in the 5 seconds i thought about it which will, unfortunately, haunt me for WEEKS probably (if not longer), would indeed mean that maia could speak to chenelo again—but the bridge would also really fuck up the entire world, and even if thara told him about it, maia would not want it manifested, which is good bc spoilers: the metaphysical bridge whose creation begins to plague thara is a compulsive seed planted by orava many hundreds of years ago with a web of maz geared to attach itself to the strongest witness for the dead presently living whenever orava was finally awoken again!! so!!!! no death bridge!!!!!! horrible terrible no good very bad idea (that will haunt thara for the rest of his life, but hey, the good news is he's well used to hauntings :') )