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#the real reason dogs howl
thelifeofjord · 11 months
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The Real Reason That Dogs Howl
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todayisafridaynight · 6 months
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would it be okay if u told me why u like aoki😭/gen😭😭😭😭BEEN TRYNA LIKE HIM FOR SO LONG I JUST CANTT but i love ur art so much so i still consume it otherwise lol
i liked tohru adachi in high school and tbh i think that alone is enough of an explanation for why i ended up liking aoki
#snap chats#haha see i told you last post's tags were relevant#anyway vLKVJEVLKAEJVLKJ IM CRYING ANON youre so funny. this is the funniest ask i coulda got thank you so much#i dont know why i like him either <- yes i do#fine lets get Real Talk about it#well first off all i thought he looked hot rolling out the elevator and i was playing the eng dub and i think his voice sounds hot there#and thats like. not athing that happens to me ever <- literally thought sawashiro was hot two frames into the game but anyway#i like politician characters. or characters that are in a position of power ESPECIALLY if they have to act like they dont suck balls#like i very much love the idea of the power of charisma and that type of thing not to mention the 'strategizing' as aoki puts it#that comes with politics. LIKE HE SUCKS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE SUCKS BUT //shrug emoji//#like its why i love the mine rggo stories i like seeing mine's thought process and how he uses his intelligence#smart's sexy to me idk what to tell you but moving on#its fun watching him lose his cool too ESP IN HIS FIGHT LMAO HE STOMPIN HIS FOOT LIKE A TODDLER SHUT UP#i also really love the arakawa family in general and thinking of aoki's relationship with each of them makes my brain explode#especially him and sawashiro that shit is painful to watch and i love it so much#i also thought him going from goth to republican was the funniest shit in the world like i howled at that AND i was distraught#aokis so interesting to me from the notion that he IS loved by his family but he has so much hatred for himself it eats him up#and as a result he cant be happy no matter what he does- how hes constantly seeking validation even if it's nothing meaningful#his lil. Dog-Eat-Dog world world belief to ichi also appealed to my edgy depressed high schooler brain. sorry.#his speech at the lockers also got to me. unfortunately. sorry everyone i empathized too hard it got too real it wasnt funny anymore#like as much as i complain bout the very end the ending is what solidified me liking aoki if not also cause of ichi's impact in those scene#plus... analyzing him and the environment around him is so much fun too....#idk reasons for why i like aoki also boil down to personal reasons. he still sucks tho so i cant be upset when people hate him LOL#i probably have more reasons or could elaborate more i love rambling but i mean. who really wants to read all that 💀💀#maybe for a character that WASNT the worst but. aoki is so LMAO#thank you for loving my art regardless :) im sorry i have to be attached to the worst guys ever
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thwipsthrown · 1 month
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Gee Remy! How come your mun lets you have TWO wives?
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"Dey know what Gambit 'bout, cher."
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electricpurrs · 1 year
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the more and more i look at wolves the more itchy i get. i want to be a wolf. i want to draw a wolf. would yall still love me if i was a catwolfboy. a wolfcatboy. an ex wolf girl cat boy. i fucking love wolves
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todays a good day not only is good omens finally here but outsidexbox have a new ttrpg video out and most importantly the neighbours don't have the builders around so they won't be treating the entire street as their own personal nightclub
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dadsbongos · 4 months
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dog and rabbit
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9.5 k words / summary - When your party is locked into a stuck trap, you and Laios are the only ones who can bare each other. You both want to be consumed, one literally, and know that only the other can fulfill your desire.
warnings - reader with she/her pronouns, cannibalism as a metaphor for love/cannibalistic thoughts and imagery, fully romantic but no upfront confession, allusions to spoilers but everyone should be safe to read, reader has ego issues and parental issues, laios and reader are both FREAKS, starvation as a plot device
~~~
pt 1 - dog eat rabbit
Mama’s hands are crusted with drying mud, dirt flakes up her bare arms as she smooths a lumpy plot. She’s knelt down, across from her is Papa, and beside Papa is his dog -- tail wagging and mouth dangling open to pant, pant, pant. Between them all is the small rectangular grave Mama just finished pampering. A thin stick sits up straight from the head of the filled hole. You stand at the other end, staring at Papa’s dog with ambivalence.
You wanted to sanitize her vibrant scratches and swelling bite marks, and you wanted her scrapes to get infected. You hoped she would recover to her yippy self soon, and you prayed the mounting limp from her front right paw was permanent. You’d be devastated if she died of her injuries, and you’d find the death to be just.
She’s terrible.
You mock up a world where she was the one eaten instead.
She’s your sole best friend now.
You hope she’s full, no longer at risk of starving to illness.
“Sit, girl,” Papa beckons, a calloused, wrinkled finger directed towards the gaping spot by your mother’s side, “Be respectful. You wanted this memorial, now be part of it.”
“I didn’t want- !“
As if sensing your following words, Mama hisses a sharp shush, then pats the ground beside her. Papa raises a brow at you, testing. Sunlight burns your back, and you spontaneously decide the shaded spot by your mother is more appealing (entirely unrelated to your parents’ demands).
Now, you are face to face with your new best friend because she is your real best friend’s murderer. You hate her. You love her. You want her to feel every shred and tear and pierce she inflicted upon your bunny.
“Darling,” Mama coos, fingers dancing up your shoulder and through your hair, uncaring for how she ruins the strands, “be realistic. A simple marsh rabbit was never going to survive out here.”
“He followed the river out for a reason,” you murmur, now looking down from the big, remorseful, wet eyes of Papa’s dog, “We were meant to be best friends.”
“You’re not a baby anymore,” Papa snaps, rising onto his feet, he glares at you. He glares at you with deep lines retracing their places in his forehead, and his hands clench so hard they shake, until they suddenly go lax. He waves both hands out, shaking them free of all tension as he sighs and turns and prattles down towards the ocean.
His dog follows, slower than she used to with a pause and caution fresh to her gait, licking his hand as he pulls free his fishing pole from the sand. Mama pats down your back and mutters apologies.
You rise shortly after and whistle the dog back into your small shelter, knowing how her wounds will burn should she follow your father into the lapping sea water. She licks your face and you pet around the open scratches from this morning.
You dream that night of what would happen if you let her wander into the ocean.
You wake up with an incredible sense of guilt.
“I’m so tired,” Marcille dregs her weight onto your back, causing you to stumble under the sudden hefty addition, “We should stop soon!”
“Agreed,” Chilchuck huffs, stretching his arms out in front of him.
“How about you?” Laois coils at the waist to glance back at you, brows raised high, “Packs wearing you down?”
“No!” you howl defensively, hands wriggling deeper into the leather of Chilchuck’s waterskin when Marcille moans in protest to your denial, “But! If everyone is tired then we should settle down, probably. I think.”
“I think so, too,” Laios nods, deferring to Senshi -- the pair murmuring about which of the dark archways lining the dungeon hall leads to a safe rest stop.
Your party finally piles into an off-room, Marcille still slouched against your back to send you both careening towards the far left end of the cellar.
“Hmm,” Chilchuck points up towards a series of holes in the cobbled archway, “It looks like this room’s rigged to lock us inside. So be careful to not step on this tile, it’ll activate the- !”
Senshi grunts over the sudden sinking in his left side, foot slid over the edge of the stone Chilchuck’s index finger is aimed at, “Whoops.”
A scream escapes the half-foot, Chilchuck narrowly rolling out of the way of downcoming spears. Pointed ends stab towards the cobblestone floor, tips scraping rock, effectively trapping your lot into the cellar.
“Eek!” you scream, both hands pawing at Laios’ arm, “We’re gonna die in here!”
“Shut up, we’re not gonna die in here,” Chilchuck groaned, rising to his knee to inspect the lock attached to the middlemost bar, “I’ll get it open in the morning. If anything, it might help keep us secured overnight, so I can’t be mad.”
“Are you sure that’s okay?” you ask, Marcille nodding in backup to your question.
“It’s a pretty simple lock, so it shouldn’t cause me too much grief in the morning.”
Laios nods, stepping back carefully to avoid jangling you off his arm as he sets out his sleeping bag. You stand over him now, hands splayed gently across his back as he flattens his mat, “If you’re gonna stay by me, could you help me get my armor off?”
If anyone except Laios were to ask, you’d probably take offense to the wording -- but it was Laios, and you know Laios well enough to know he’d never want to hurt your feelings.
So you nod, despite the fact he cannot see you, “Of course!”
Neither you or Laios is certain when physical contact became so normal between you, only that now it's strange for Laios to remove his heavy plating without you. So he tries to suck up every opportunity he can now, requesting your assistance whenever the party stocks into a room with a door to keep out ambushers.
“Hey,” Marcille beckons from across the room, already having set out both your mats, “I thought you’d be by me tonight.”
“I will be! Just… helping…” you return focus to Laios, giddily undoing the leather straps of your leader’s grieves before rushing off his pauldrons.
“Thanks again,” he works off the clasps on his arms, slinking free from each piece with a noisy series of clunks and thuds.
“I love helping,” you rationalize quickly, face alight with glee as you wait for Laios to set aside his gorget. Once given a go-ahead nod, you eagerly grasp the lip of his cuirass by the waist and tip upwards. While you’re not lying about your natural proclivity to be helpful, you’re also not terribly against feeling the broadness of Laios’ body up close.
You blame it on admiration.
You admire how he can move so smoothly in such heavy pieces. You admire how despite the both of you being tall-men, he’s managed to occupy the stature to a fuller extent than you. He’s not just big because of his race, but he’s got real discipline to continuously train and hone his combat skills. His muscles are as aesthetically pleasing as they are a sign of his dedication.
In a weird way, you think every monster to be eaten by him should be honored.
Ironically, that night you dream of the party’s first encounter with monsters you couldn’t eat: Orcs.
“First ones to die are the ones with the weapons!”
“Aah!” you shriek, immediately releasing your daggers so the blades crash by your knees with a faint tink, tink, tink, “I’m unarmed! Please don’t kill me!”
“Have a backbone!” Chilchuck shouts at you, though beads of sweat are pouring down his face as well.
“I don’t wanna die, Chilchuck!” you cry, sniffling.
“I don’t either, you know?” he hisses in your ear.
Your eyes are too clogged by waterworks to make out the following dispute between Senshi and the Orcs. Now hugging a pair of onions to your chest for support rather than your teensy needlepoint daggers.
“Them veggies be something you grew, I guess?” despite the lilt in his tone, you don’t take the Orc Chief’s tone as a question, “We’re on a supply run lookin’ for food. ‘Preciate if you’d share them with us.”
“Sure, be happy to. What you got to trade for them?” Senshi must be crazy to expect a trade with big, hungry Orcs with big, shiny weapons surrounding you all.
“No trade. Tribe’s desperate, we barely got up to this floor alive. You’ve been a good friend and I hate to do this, but… hand over everything you got. Right now.”
You fumble the onions between your arms, then shirking off the carrots tangled in your bag’s side pockets. Senshi glares at you through his peripherals, grumbling quietly for you to pick the crops back up before returning to his parley with the Orcs.
Unfortunately, your obvious compliance earns you no favor compared to your comrades.
“Coward,” Marcille thunks her head against the cabbage in her hands, “Coward!”
“I was scared!” you wish you had your forfeited onions back, even if only to provide something to cling to. The space between your arms feels so glaringly empty it makes your racing heart swerve to overdrive.
“Everyone was!” Chilchuck glares up at you, then toward Senshi, “Except that idiot.”
“Be nice,” you knot your fingers together, only to watch them unravel again as your group is herded towards the Orcs’ makeshift camp. Then, you look to Senshi for backup, “Besides, they were getting thrown out if we couldn’t trade, right? What’s the harm?”
Senshi shakes his head at you disapprovingly, and it oddly cuts deeper than when your father would do the same, “You need to stand your ground, that’s the difference.”
“Don’t antagonize her,” Laios jumps in, voice level in spite of the agitated pinch in his brow, “You all know she hates pain.”
“Who doesn’t, dumbass?!” Chilchuck grits, quickly hushing himself, “None of us want to suffer.”
With admittedly no comeback, even with all your prayers that he’d clunk one together, Laios shrugs, and -- as if sensing your dilemma -- sticks out his bicep for you to hug to your chest.
You woke up feeling despondent, gloomily rolling up your area and preparing for the day’s adventure while Senshi made breakfast. And as much as you wish Laios’ curiosity could inspire any excitement within yourself to try the lumpy larvae porridge from cellar-dwelling insects, you’re really not craving any.
“Hey!” but there the blonde is, calling to you and restlessly patting the floor beside him, “Come on, it’s almost ready!”
With weak, frizzly resolve, you conceded in an instant. Just as instantly, you regret it.
Faint, tangy iron clings to the gum of your mouth. A sourness washing over your palette soon after. Your lips press tightly before your tongue lolls out and you’re scraping the harsh edge of your spoon down your flesh, “Blehhh…!”
“Seriously?” Chilchuck sighs, though not withholding his own scrunched face, “You’re acting like a kid.”
“It’s gross!” you whine, bowl clattering between your legs, “It hurts my mouth!”
“Really?” Laios leans in from your left, his chest, while still unguarded, crushes against your shoulder, pointing down into your bowl with his own spoon, “Mind if I have yours?”
“Be my guest,” you slide the bowl his way, then squishing the tip of your tongue into your top gums, “I think it burnt a dent in my mouth.”
Chilchuck groans this time, loud and abrasive, eyes narrowed at you, “It’s not even that bad.”
“You’ve been brainwashed! Monster guts are monster guts, and this time their stomach acid burned my mouth!” you look to your right, at the elf contently munching on Senshi’s cooking, “Right, Marcille?!”
(Senshi’s rebuttal of, “Ain’t no guts in this.” goes unnoticed)
“Hm?” she withers under your pointed stare, shoulders shriveling towards her chest, “I mean, yeah, it is weird…” then she lifts her bowl level to her face, dodging your gaze, “But I don’t think it's burned my mouth.”
“Maybe I’m allergic,” you drivel, focus flitting to Laios’s hands as he grabs your serving to dig in -- even licking the excess off your abandoned utensil, “If I’m allergic I might die…”
“Or you’re just crazy,” Chilchuck intervenes.
“Be nice to me!” you cry, raising a fist as if to strike the man over your fire. You’d never, you don’t have the courage.
Laios nods, “Be nice.”
“You’ll be hungry later,” Senshi chastises, “Eating is the privilege of the living. You’re squanderin’ it.”
“We’ll have lunch later,” you curl your knees to your chest, binding them with both arms tight around your thighs, “I can wait.”
“Who says we’ll find anything worth eating?” you doubt Chilchuck cares about either your stomach or Senshi’s cooking, you instead boldly assume he just wants to keep lecturing you.
“We will!” you lay your head against Laios’ shoulder, peeking up at the man through your lashes, “Right, Laios? We’ll find food again today.”
“I mean, yeah,” he blinks down at you cluelessly, “Deeper we go down, the more we’re bound to find!”
“See! We’ll find food!”
“It’s too early to be fighting…” Marcille frowns, eyes flicking from you to Chilchuck, and back to you.
Chilchuck retires his own bowl and grossly wipes his mouth off with his arm before scooching to the door, waving off whatever retort could follow.
Senshi takes both yours and Laios’ bowls once both are emptied before turning to you, “You may want to dig into the spare snacks in your bag anyway. Ain’t good to start the day on an empty stomach.”
His sudden warmth inspires a molten ooze in your own chest, you shyly nod before muttering, “Sorry for calling your cooking gross… it isn’t, actually. I liked- !”
“Larvae pods can’t be for everyone,” he cuts you off with a speedy recovery, “More for the people that do enjoy it.”
“Thanks for sharing!” Laios claps your back, trying to be friendly and only rattling your balance.
Senshi and Laios begin packing up as you spindle onto your hands and knees to crawl the couple of paces towards your bag. Creeping a hand under the flap to dig for treats, your whole body spiking with goosebumps and raised hairs when you distinctly miss any indentation of rations in your palm. You prattle forward another two knees-worth and unlatch the golden clasp to dig through your bag.
“Oh, no…” you mutter, movements growing more agitated the longer you go without finding food, “No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no…”
“You okay?”
You jump back, clenching both hands over your heart and nodding rapidly, “Yeah, fine! No worries here, Laios!”
“Sounds good!” he backs away to continue assisting Senshi.
“No!” suddenly, Chilchuck’s voice stabs through the room, “No, no, no, no, no!”
“What’s wrong?” Marcille rushes over, clutching Ambrosia between unsteady palms.
Thankfully the party’s attention pivots to the screaming lockpick and you get the grace of pretending there’s absolutely more food left for your group. No problems here!
“It’s jammed!” Chilchuck wrangles the silver bars, then latching onto the boxy lock itself as if to choke all life from the metal, “How am I supposed to pick a lock if the lock isn’t sufficient quality?!”
Or, apparently, you cannot pretend. At least not for long because a problem arose on the opposite side of the cell.
“You can get us out though, right?” Marcille’s grip on Ambrosia loosens, even calm enough to lay the staff against a wall.
“Of course, I can. Who do I look like?” Chilchuck scoffs.
Silently, you beseech Chilchuck’s expertise surpasses this lock’s apparent lack thereof.
“So, how’s the door?”
.
.
.
“Still not open!”
“I thought you were a specialist on these things, Chilchuck.”
All fiddling and knocking ceases in an instant, Chilchuck now staring dead-eyed at Laios for his unwelcomed quip.
“So scary,” Laios whispers beneath his breath, then turning towards you with a subtle downturn of his lips, “What’d I do?”
Hugging yours and Chilchuck’s bags closer to your chest with a stilted shrug, you reply, “I guess he didn’t appreciate the input.”
“I thought- “
Chilchuck’s icy stare kills your leader’s words in his throat.
“Well, we still have leftovers, so we aren’t in trouble of starving for awhile,” you fabricate, digging a hand through your bag to aid your illusion of ease, “When we do run out, I have a plan! So don’t worry about going hungry.”
“Hm?” Laios quirks a brow at your uneven grin.
Before he can prod for more direction, Marcille’s popping back and relieved groan creak through the room. She arches up from her recline on the ground, gold tresses fluttering out around her head. With more huffing and moaning, she flips onto her stomach and stablizing onto her elbows to stare at Chilchuck’s twiddling. Poking and striking various chords and rods within the lock’s bottom hole, you can hear Chilchuck’s frustrated swears in both common and native tongue (though the longer he goes without success, the more obscure and foreign his curses sound).
You’d hate to see Chilchuck face more defeat than he’s already bore. Few hours have passed since waking to find yourselves locked in the dungeon cellar. Chilchuck will soon be considering blood sacrifices made from all four of you, you fear.
“You know, it’s been awhile since I could wash my hair… would be nice if we were out so I could take care of that,” Marcille grins, already knowing the response she’ll pull talking like that.
“Marci, be quiet…!” you whine anxiously, eyes narrowing on Chilchuck’s back.
The man slowly turns his head to narrow his eyes at Marcille, “Huh?” she shrugs coyly, curling a finger into framing strands of her long hair, Chilchuck laughs. Rage thinly veiled by (obviously forced) lightheartedness, “Didn’t quite catch that.”
“Guys!” you wail, “Please!”
Senshi sighs through his nose, murmuring about kids bickering as he polishes the knife you only see used for cooking.
Tense silence descends upon your group once again.
Turning to the blonde at your side, you murmur, “I’m more worried about how to keep from getting bored. I feel like boredom is when everyone starts hating each other…”
Laios straightens up at your concern, twisting noisily through his personal bag to drag out a leather bound journal, “I could show you my notes about monsters! They’re pretty long so it’ll take awhile, perfect way to kill time while Chil’ gets us out!”
Nodding, you lean into his side, watching intently as he recites each tidbit and offbeat scribble as if by heart. You notice that none of the writing is as softened by print or recognizable as what’s scrawled in his guide on edible monsters. You don’t think this book has been exposed to the party yet, and that thought is patently delightful. That you are so dependable to Laios he’s willing to show off something born from his raw passion.
“It was something I teased when I was by myself,” he confesses, cheeks glowing rosy at the vulnerability of it all, “When I started wondering about the integrity of the Gourmet Guide, it inspired me to make a real guide. So, even though I’m sad the author probably never ate the monsters they wrote about, I can still honor the passion it gave me.”
“Wow,” you turn onto your hip and cradle his arm against yours. Perhaps overly casually, you sling a leg over one of his and rest your head against his shoulder, his chill shirt icing the heat on your own cheek (his simmering skin beneath quickly reheats it), “You’re really cool, Laios.”
Marcille’s side-eye goes unacknowledged when you say that.
“Seriously?” you’re easily distracted from everyone else when Laios is grinning so brightly at you, “You think so?”
“Mhm!”
“You’re really cool, too,” he wishes he could say more, but your pretty face so close to his is strangling his bravery.
That night, you have the strangest dream.
A lion of gold fur and pearly wings looms over you, globs of His drool hanging and dribbling onto your forehead. Temptation to reach up and comb your fingers through His mane rushes through you -- but you cannot move. Limbs bogged by a weight unseen, and then there is a dog.
Big black eyes pour down on you, front paws plastered at each side of your waist to hold himself up. Pointed teeth peek through its panting snout -- bloodthirsty growls verberating low through its body. You blink and the dog is different. Yipping like a friend, tail wagging at the sight of you, it licks your cheek. You blink and the dog is gone, replaced with a fellow tall-man. Armor removed and shirt hanging low, you can make out his collarbones and the dip down towards his chest -- if you dare to stare straight down then you could make out the handles of his hips.
Blood stains the seams between his teeth, chin glistening with crimson gush. Faintly, you can make out the sensation of lips puckered around your fingers; sucking and nibbling at your nail beds. Chilchuck, Marcille, Senshi. They all seem so at ease, faces completely lax similar to those of nursing kittens.
Laios’ lips press into your neck, hot and cold clashing when he introduces teeth. You can’t even feel the pain as he digs in -- instead, you feel just as calm as your friends look.
You feel serene.
Marcille snaps a finger bone like it's a carrot between her molars. Chilchuck and Senshi lave the spilling blood from her cheeks. They can’t get enough of you. Laios burrows his arms beneath your waist, pressing your body closer into his as he desperately tongues your flesh down his throat.
Hungrily and contently, they swallow you down. Every morsel.
You feel most loved.
You woke up feeling grateful.
Chilchuck has not yet gotten your party free. As the day progresses, you feel that gratitude leaking over the floor. It curdles in the open air and soaks into the bottom of Marcille and Laios’ shoes as they ask you to unlock your food pouch.
Cheerful, expectant faces haunt you from above. Marcille, of course, has nothing but patience for you, but the killer is Laios. Obviously. Laios, who so, so fervently and imperatively trusts you so, so wholeheartedly is your biggest problem in this fiasco. He always looks at you like you could never do anything wrong, and you’ve never hated it until now.
Wide, twinkly amber eyes drill into you, “It’s been awhile since we’ve had to dig into the rations, I don’t even remember what’s all in there.”
Marcille nods in agreement, excitement at the prospect of eating obvious in the drool pooling in the corners of her mouth, “Right? It’ll be nice to have something non-monster related, at least.”
“You think so?” Laios pouts, “I thought you were warming up to eating monsters.”
“It's still not my first choice!”
In the midst of their spat, your attention is split between trying to conjure a plausible reason to deny them; and manifesting a destiny where they forgot why they approached you.
By the time Marcille’s tummy croaks through the cramped room, neither has come to fruition. She cups the pouch of her stomach, embarrassed at its echoing rumble.
“Jeez, thought I was hungry…” Chilchuck teases from his post at the door.
“Hey! That was a totally reasonable sound for how long it's been since we ate. And who’s to say that was even me? It could’ve been Laios!”
“It wasn’t,” Senshi adds.
“Definitely wasn’t,” Chilchuck’s sly grin cracks upon the sound of his own gut joining the conversation.
“Ha!” Marcille’s joy is usually able to cleanse your dreary moods, but usually you’re not keeping such a destructive secret.
Usually, you don’t freeze yourself in place like it’ll prevent your party from noticing you’re still alive -- all to avoid them asking the same question from minutes ago,
“So, can you open up the food pack?”
You are not so lucky.
Laios has asked you again.
Rare is it for you to refuse him, because rarer it is for him to ask something outrageous or impossible (or impossibly outrageous) of you. This is the one in a billion chance that you must turn him down. But how can you when he’s looking at you so kindly?
A frazzled, puny No trapped in the back of your desiccate throat when suddenly Senshi says it for you.
“Best to save our rations so we can eat right before we leave.”
Senshi’s trust in you makes you somehow more nauseous. Marcille’s downtrodden agreement makes that stacked nausea triple. Laios curling up beside you to keep you company makes you so electrified you’re certain to be hiccuping bile soon.
(you don’t end up puking, thankfully)
That night, you dreamt of the time you and Laios met.
He’s really beautiful, it's the first thing you notice about him. Too beautiful to be a dungeon crawler, Laios’ face is more befitting of royalty. To be praised and swooned over and kissed.
“It’ll be less pay than, well, our swordsman or mage.”
You think his thoughtfulness makes him more beautiful.
Strangely, you feel the need to comfort him. Overcompensate the mediocrity of such a position simply so he doesn’t feel guilty hiring you (because in the back of your head is the fear that if he feels guilty, he simply won’t take you on).
“That’s fine! I don’t mind at all, as long as I get any money I couldn’t care less.”
You just want a house. You just don’t want to suffer.
“Alright, then, looks like we have a carrier,” Laios looked to Falin, the girl nodding with a cheery smile.
You just want to be as close to the beautiful, shining, gnashing sun as possible.
You woke up feeling thirsty.
You’d twisted over to dig out your watersack when you found that your entire pack was missing. Ice spilled across your entire body at the sight, a swelling, obnoxious anxiety aching through your nervous system. You could feel your heartbeat in your throat, and you could hear the blood pumping through your ears.
Slowly, your head swivels around the room, until you find your pack in the arms of another -- who is now settled across the room rather than beside you.
Peculiarly close to Senshi’s pseudo-camp, Marcille is scratching your bag tightly to her chest.
“Marci,” you call, dredging the boys’ curiosity towards you. You don’t know if she’s taken the liberty of looking inside, “Give that back…”
She does not, merely hugging the leather tighter. Such desperation clues you that she’s most likely just as oblivious about the bag’s contents as everyone else is. Her stomach rumbles loudly, you swallow dryly and wet your lips to beg.
“Marci, please!”
The elf hisses back, not unlike a pestered kitty, and clutches your pack tighter to her chest. She glares through her lashes, kicking her legs out when Laios reaches to take your bag back.
Senshi shakes his head and rises from his own spot in the corner. Marcille’s gaze hones in on the dwarf instantly, and she whirls around to face the wall -- now caging your bag to her chest.
“Marci,” you retry weakly, “please, hoarding isn’t- !”
She silences you with another shortburst glare over her shoulder, “Who said I was hoarding?” she ‘hmph’s and shakes her head, “How do I know you won’t just eat it all as soon as I’m not looking?! Huh?! You’ve gone the longest without food after all!”
You gasp at the accusation, then sparing a glance up at Laios to see if he’s buying her tale, “How could you say that? I always share! It’s everyone’s food!”
“Marcille,” Senshi commands cooly, standing at your side, “you should know that isn’t like her. We all share our food so nobody goes hungry. To intentionally starve others is just cruel.”
“Exactly!” you plea, shakily reaching out only to yank your hands back to your chest when she snaps at your fingers with full teeth, “Just give it back, please?!”
Laios frowns, visibly uncertain how to bring you and Marcille back to the giddy lounging gals you were mere days ago, “Marcille, you two are friends -- if you know she’s never stolen before, why would she start now?”
Marcille sharply redirects her stare into the corner, shrugging and clutching the pouch tighter.
Chilchuck bangs his forehead into the door, “Children.”
“Marcille…” you whimper, hot in the face and barely believing you’re even telling the truth right now. You’re delirious with dehydration and hunger and skepticism that you’re being honest, making it hard to see straight. Elf and tall-man faces blur together, Senshi is blotted out by the black dots in the corners of your vision, and Chilchuck is a mere speck. Far, far away. You feel far, far away. Like you could die, like you’re dreaming, and oh as the words come out of your mouth you’re actually hoping that you are dreaming, “it’s empty.”
Every head snaps to you. All dizziness snaps into hyperawareness. At minimum it's two degrees colder than it used to be, you can hear the sound of your own breathing, and the smell of mold rots away every other scent in the room.
You shrink into yourself and barely scrounge the courage to keep from curling into a rocking ball of apologies. Your disbelief doubles when you realize you’re still looking Marcille in the face -- eye to devastated eye.
“It’s empty?”
“It’s empty…”
Senshi steps back from your side, you want to dig your nails into his ankles and drag him back. You don’t. Laios retreats as well and you selfishly wish he’d just pierce you with his sword, if only to end this humiliation and regret. Now that everyone’s staring at you, you realize you probably should’ve said something from the start.
“I thought maybe Chilchuck would’ve gotten us out by now… I didn’t think we’d still be here…” you try to reason.
The harsh clatter and clang of Chilchuck’s picks against the ground draws your attention, he’s got both hands knotted into fists. His face drawn in a slant, as if he’s silently asking you to repeat yourself. As if he didn’t quite catch that.
“Then it's my fault?” he swiftly dodges the arm Senshi puts out as a blockade, now in your face and far more threatening than usual, “You’re saying it’s my fault your pack is empty?”
“No! Just- !”
“So why even mention that?!” he huffs, “Why even say my name?”
“I just thought that once we were out we’d find more food and then it wouldn’t be a problem!”
“So you still wanted to lie to us?”
“I never said that! You’re putting words in my mouth! Stop putting words in my mouth!”
“Your plan was to intentionally hide the truth -- that’s lying!”
“No! It’s just hiding!”
Chilchuck screams, raw with frustration and unbridled by cumbersome words. He covers his face with both hands as if he’s in pain just to look upon you.
“I’m sorry!” you plea, now turning to Laios with weak sobs bubbling right beneath your skin. Your face feels as though it's been scorched with dragon’s fire, though your eyes are flooded wet, “I just didn’t want everyone to be scared. I would’ve told you once we were out! Promise!”
Laios always liked being close to you the best, including Falin. In the wake of her disappearance, his inclination towards your presence has only magnified. You engage his interest in monsters, you’re forward and blatant with your compassion, and your skin on his is always so soothing. Laios doesn’t guess if you’re genuine, he knows you are. He imagines that’s why when you touch him it’s so warm and calming whereas others’ makes him itch.
Your soul itself must be as sweet as the bottom innard of an ivy tentacle.
“I know,” Laios nods, smiling thinly, “I know you would’ve.”
If you say you thought it was for the best, then you really must have, and he can’t berate you for having a heart.
You return his grin threefold, overtly thrilled he’s believed in you, yet again.
“You’re kidding!” Chilchuck shouts, now tugging sharply at his hair in frustration, his face red, “Laios, how can you let her get away with this?!”
Marcille shoves your pack into your face, standing over your toppled form. She looks like she hates you.
Now you’re the one cradling a food-barren bag to your chest. Laios assists you to your feet, prying your bag from your arms with gentle fingers to settle it along the wall. It sags, giving way to its empty stomach and collapsing over itself, folding into halves.
Marcille inhales deeply, mouth popping open to speak, but it's your resident half-foot’s voice that cuts through the air.
“Why are you here?” Chilchuck grumbles, glaring up at you.
His sudden venom stuns you into silence. Chilchuck’s face round with a specifically unfamiliar malice. Through his wired irritation at mimics and tentacles, he has never looked so particularly irked. So vexed. He looks like he detests your very face.
“I need money…” you murmur, curling into yourself the longer his terrible stare goes, “Just like you…”
“No. You’re not just like me, we’re not alike,” he’s unnecessarily defensive at your claim, “I’m useful. I work. You don’t do anything. Why are you here?” he lowers his voice, but you can’t mistake the change for any sense of relief, “There’s lots of things you could do for money.”
“Chilchuck!” Marcille wails, eyes wide -- snapped from their previous disdain and now fraught with shock and dread, her hands hover at her chest as if she could physically slice, rearrange, and mend the tension, “Don’t say that!”
“Be nice,” you wring your hands, “Be nice to me,” you frown, “I didn’t want to work a hard job, and being a carrier pays well enough. Then, uh, then I thought maybe I could be useful if I died… I could be like a meat shield, and then when I die you could eat me. You know, if you ever got stuck down here… like now.”
Chilchuck guffaws, jaw dropping and brows furrowing in distraught, “Eat you?! You thought we would eat you?!”
“I wouldn’t be offended,” shrugging, you crane your head down before subtly ticking sideways towards Laios, “You’ve never eaten human, right? I’m sure it’d be interesting.”
“How could you say that?!” Marcille buds in, once again on the offense. Senshi lingers in the back of your party, beneath the shaded hood of his helmet his gaze is steely. Determinately opposed to your very ideals. He’s eerily quiet, as if complying with Chilchuck and Marcille’s side will mistakenly motivate your own. That, or he’s so horrified none of his nerve endings will respond to his brain.
Laios does not refute your claim.
He swallows roughly, eyes darting to the floor.
“Everyone,” still staring at the ground, Laios steps between your group’s semi-circle, “Enough fighting,” his voice is quiet, too, but not calm. Ragged and soft, exasperated, “Please, stop fighting.”
A sturdy markdown of your offer never escapes his lips, though.
You nod slowly, “I’m sorry for being so useless. I thought I was doing something good…”
“You do,” Laios takes you by the shoulder, spinning you the other way towards your lone mat. His voice grows quieter, by the echo you can tell he’s talking to the others now, “Don’t antagonize her.”
Your sleeping bag is cold, it ruffles stiffly everytime you move. The fluffed material beneath your head fares no better, frost biting your cheek and lapping your splayed, exposed eyeballs. Tears prick as both eyes crisp dry -- cooled droplets dripping across your cheeks. Sorrow mixes with the salt, you thought you were doing good.
Perhaps by volunteering yourself to be used to the very last shred of meat, you could be more treasured. Cowardice outweighed by willingly absorbing the worst of your party’s instincts. By this method, you are more desired.
So you thought, but you’ve been rejected.
Squealing with protest, your sleeping bag retches around shivery shoulders as you smush your quivering lips into the material of your mat.
“These past couple of days have been hard on you, huh?” Laios unrolls his own sleeping bag beside yours. You flinch at the unwelcomed rumble of his voice, unfortunately he continues, “I get it. Everyone’s on-edge,” his comforting words fail to reach you, he slips into his bag, staring at you, “I hope you’re not sleeping yet… That’d make this kind of pointless…”
“Laios.”
“There you are,” he sighs, relieved, and you cannot imagine why. You don’t think there’s anything to be relieved about as long as you’re around, sucking up space and precious resources.
“Laios,” you call, “We should just do it. Right here.”
“Huh?”
You twist your head to peek over your shoulder, chilled tears drying tracks into your cheeks, confirming each of your friends is tucked and slumbering on the other side of the room. Surely, none of them would hear so long as you didn’t fight back; and you’re certain you won’t. Laios isn’t the type to make you suffer. He knows you hate suffering. He isn’t sadistic, after all, the only pleasure he takes in killing is the follow-up: eating.
“You want to, right?” you usually wouldn’t be so daring as to make the suggestion on your own, but food supply has dwindled too drastically by now. Everyone else can maintain their delusion all they want, but you know Laios is not one to deny himself, “Laios, you want to?”
He inhales sharply, molten amber eyes blazing through your face -- faint candlelight shines against his irises and bounces back the lump of your silhouette. Stubbornly, he says nothing -- neither nodding or shaking his head. Instead, he lies still, as if bitten by a Cockatrice.
“We can do it right now. They’re all asleep.”
Laios sneaks a hand through the neckhole of his sleeping bag, arm slithering out to soothe the pad of his thumb over your cheek. Silently, he appreciates the roundness of your face, the slope of your neck.
He does want to sink his teeth in, but this feels stranger than consuming monsters. It stretches far past the walking mushrooms or slimes on the top level; the problematic nature of your proposal even surpasses Chilchuck’s humanoid debate. You’re not a mere humanoid -- you’re human. Another tall-man. Your muscle composition is just the same as his -- your skeletons indecipherable from one another.
It shouldn’t be difficult to decide, Laios knows that much. He shouldn’t have to think about it. He shouldn’t shut down every time you mention it.
Despite that, he does -- he considers how the flesh of another tall-man would roll between his molars. Would the meat be salty? Or savory? How much fat should he trim -- or should he boil it all down just to save?
But aside from that, the reason he wants to mark your neck is not those taboo urges. Completely unrelated, in fact.
Laios’ fingers trail from your pulse point, curving along your exposed shoulder and dipping beneath your bag to dig blunt nails into your arm.
“No,” he squeezes your shoulder in what he hopes is a reassuring gesture, “Not you,” his hand retracts, coiling back to his chest, “I don’t want to eat you.”
“We’ll all die…” you frown, eyes of an iridescent sunshine sheen maintain their hold on you, “It’s better for one to go rather than the rest of the party, right? I can be useful like that…”
“I don’t want to eat you.”
“Oh…”
“Yeah,” his eyes flutter shut, brows pinching towards the middle of his face. And he cares not for what that may say about him as a leader. He’d giddily offer up the entire party to be found by corpse retrievers before gobbling you down.
“But then why keep me around? I don’t do anything special like Chilchuck or Marcille. I can’t cook or fight like Senshi. And I’m nothing like you.”
“You don’t have to be,” he tucks his chin by his chest, still avoiding your stare, “I prefer you as you. I’m glad we know each other, I don’t care if you feel useless because you’re not. Just having you around makes me feel more alive. More excited to explore the dungeon, even before Falin got taken. I feel like I need you around more than before. Since Shuro said he hated me… I guess it’s been tougher to trust that I’m not annoying everyone. With you, though, I don’t even have to question it. Outside the dungeon, too, when we’re in town. It’s nice to be around you the most.”
His eyes are clenched tighter and tighter the longer his spiel goes on -- he cannot bear to look you in the eyes while guts and bile spew from his lips. His cheeks are red, raw from self-imposed exposure.
“Do you mean that?” you ask quietly, eyes so wide in shock he’s forced to meet them as he opens his own, “Am I useful to you, just because I’m me?”
He hums, nodding softly. Crude emotion overwhelms you at the admission; confusion and disbelief and desire tangle in your stomach, loose tendrils flapping up into your gullet and knotting around your uvula until you spit up a meek,
“Can I sleep with you?” as if he would refuse you, you tack on, “I don’t want to be alone.”
Wordlessly, Laios unzips his sleeping bag -- you crawl out from your own to invade his space. His body is soft yet firm against your back, and he makes a clear effort in keeping his breaths shallow. You can see the worsening red tint of his cheeks, even in the wavering candlelight.
Laios’ body goes limp once you’re settled beside him. Selfishly, you press into his lax form -- exhaustion and hunger making your head light. You’re not concretely sure you’re conscious right now. Maybe this is your final dream before you are culled by starvation.
Your stomach grumbles, and Laios pouts at the sound. Bringing one hand over his own abdomen, Laios edges his fingers around his ribcage. He can feel the bone’s impression. He hasn’t been able to feel the protrusion since splitting from the traveling caravan with Falin. He’s unaccustomed to starving himself, he’s unsure how much longer he can hold himself together. You, however, pay no mind to the sound.
You don’t so much as crimp into yourself.
“It’s kinda weird,” you muse suddenly, turning in Laios’ bag so your chest is pressed to his. Oddly, for all its intimate implications, the contact feels natural, “I hate suffering more than anything else, but I can’t bring myself to regret giving you my breakfast a couple days ago. Even though the suffering that nasty junk gave me was a lot better than how I feel right now.”
“You shouldn’t say things like that,” Laios’ arms wrap around you, tucking you even closer to him and forcing your legs to mingle with his, “Eating is the best thing you could do for your body.”
“I’m happier you got to eat than I would’ve been after eating it. Besides,” you cant your head up, chin digging into the center of his thick chest -- looking up at Laios, “I prefer sleeping to nourish my body.”
“As soon as we’re out, you’ll have the most delicious meal we can make in the dungeon.”
He hugs you tighter.
You don’t dream that night. But Laios does.
pt 2 - rabbit eat dog
Laios’ cheeks sting in the frosty air, forearms and knees stubbornly tingling through the puffer of his red long-sleeve. Attempting to make out the space even five inches before his face is impossible through the thick, icy fog, but he knows the way. His feet pivot in perfect tune to each divot and roll of the plains.
He’s grown up here. Ran over these lands since he could lift one leg over the other, though now he is alone. Wandering with only the intent to find, and even then he is alone. Laios never feels more alone than when he is in a room full of people, at least in solitude he cannot be ridiculed or judged. Cowardly as it may seem to run from his problems, Laios chases relief -- where exactly that is, he’s unsure. His relief comes in forms that move, much more inconvenient than ale or tobacco but also much more divine. Moving sister, moving moon, moving monsters.
A cursory, confirming glance up gives sight to the real moon hanging above Laios -- a pale face beaming down to give light, only to be choked out by this unabating fog. Fond for night, Laios feels eased by the celestial. Nighttime, childishly, is something he’s always associated with terrible creatures in the bowls of dungeons. Besides that, is how quiet the house becomes past sundown, when the only conscious soul is his. Sometimes his sister stood up with him, too, and that was nice.
Nice, still, is the other moon’s presence. One less large and pale. One that walked at his side.
A soft glow scourges through the plumes of gray, encouraging Laios to quicken his pace. Warmth blooms across his frosted extremities, thawing stiff joints until suddenly he’s too hot beneath his puffer. Stripping the material, he’s left to sweat in a simple pullover shirt as he begins stumbling towards the glow.
Fog clears, drifting apart seamlessly.
Laios trips abruptly, seemingly over his own footing, before tumbling to his knees, hands scraping on hidden rocks and dirt clots. His eyes water from the intense sear of light painting the ground.
“Hey.”
Laios, against better intuition, feels a bizarre sense of calm wash over him at the voice’s intrusion. Perhaps specifically because of whose voice calls to him.
You loom over his huddled frame, just as bright and welcoming as the moon, and just as pretty too. Prettier, he corrects.
“Hi,” he returns your greeting lamely, rising slowly to a stand.
“You look hungry.”
Recently, Laios has discovered that even after a hearty meal his appetite is not quite satiated. During the brief moments where his mind can wander, he spends it contemplating what he could be eating in that moment. Well, that when he’s not thinking about you. While his stomach is not a bottomless pit ever unfilled, more often than not he’s adopting the attitude of well, i could eat. Not quite greed, not quite temperance. He’ll take what is offered and be gracious.
So, yes, in short, Laios supposes he is always hungry. Admitting that to you is particularly embarrassing, however, because you never seem hungry. Even when your stomach sings with starvation, your discomfort is completely invisible.
He used to assume it was your resilience -- a sign of your courage, to continue adventuring regardless of your terror.
(now, he’s starting to think differently, with your fresh disposition of raw nerves and desperation to be enjoyed)
“You’re hungrier, right?”
“Not really.”
“Oh…” he’s unsure how to respond. Trapped to stare at you while you stare back.
These parts of the fields are entirely unfamiliar to Laios.
“You should be hungry,” he tries to reason.
“Why?”
“Don’t know. Just a feeling, really.”
“What should I eat?” you frown, inching closer.
“Whatever you want,” he answers honestly. Laios believes in free will, but in some strange, completely unintelligible way, he thinks you deserve the most free will. He thinks you should do whatever you want, whenever you want, and he’s left confused how you don’t feel the same.
(feasibly in light of the night’s cannibal-themed fight) You suddenly suggest, “What about you?”
Laios freezes at that, all fire radiating from you icing over in an instant. Gaze sinking to his feet. Could he realistically agree to that? End his life to feed you? Does his devotion stretch so far?
Laios would hate to (permanently) die… but he would hate more for you to (permanently) die before him.
He dodges your question with one of his own, “Would you still like me if I was a monster?”
When he’s feeling distinctly indulgent, Laios flashes into long past fantasies of becoming a tri-headed beast.
And if he were to become one, would you gaze upon him just as kindly? Would Laios still be Laios to you?
His eyes follow each twinge in your face as you think, brows scrunching and bottom lip sucked between your teeth. Eventually you nod, slow and measured, “Yes. I would.”
Laios believes that, honestly. You would have to. You’re just that amazing. So, he should be amazing in equal measure -- or more, he should aim to impress you with his greatness.
So, yes. If you really wanted to. He could feed you with himself.
You wake up feeling unrefreshed.
Senshi, Marcille, and Chilchuck continue to bar themselves across the room from you. Laios freely travels from one end to the other despite your party’s annoyance with him. Grumbling stomachs echo from each person in the group now, and you wonder if maybe you should circumvent Laios’ rejection to feed your friends anyway. To make up for your various mistakes and blunders. It's only right.
You stare at Chilchuck’s back -- his arms no longer flailing with movement, hands instead paused around the box lock itself. He’s glaring at the mechanism, you think he’s hoping nobody notices his lack of effort. Marcille and Senshi are murmuring amongst themselves, casting wry glances your way every other sentence. Perhaps they’re discussing potential ways to make you suffer when they finally gut you.
You wouldn’t fight back, you know you wouldn’t. For the good of the pack’s survival, you’ll let them feast upon you.
(it does not once cross your mind that they could be talking about how to best convince you you’re wrong for writing your own consumption off so easily)
Laios sits at your back. Not moving. Not touching. Watching.
Your eyes drift from Chilchuck’s petrified frame to the floor, then to one cobbled block slightly lower than the others. About an inch below level, but not sunken in completely: the stone Senshi stepped on.
“Senshi?” you call.
No response.
“Hey, Senshi?”
He’s staring at you, but his eyes are hard to make out beneath his helmet. You shift upon your knees despite Laios’ soft bleat of disapproval. Marcille now stares as well, eyes much easier to spot when they’re wide with worry.
“I think this stone is…” you shove the step with your meager might and it budges a mere centimeter.
Laios’ hand overlaps yours, pushing down as well. The stone thuds loudly, and Chilchuck suddenly jumps back as the spears clink and shoot into the holed ground. He rockets back up to fuddle the lock, this time it clicks and pops open first try.
“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” Chilchuck kicks up at the retreating bars in vain. He whirls around to see you and Laios hunched over the stone and sighs, silently passing you both to collect his bags and exit.
Senshi and Marcille follow example.
Laios unlatches from your back, and you miss his warmth more immediately than you thought you would.
“I think I should leave the party.”
“Why?” he frowns so genuinely, you’d be unable to buy his cluelessness if you hadn’t known him for so long.
“They don’t like me anymore,” you settle both hands in your lap, plucking at the skin around your nails, “They know I’m useless.”
“So?” his tone is soft, so opposite to his callous start, “I want you here more than anybody. I’m happy to have people I trust and who are good at their work, but I think if you didn’t come with us back into the dungeon, it’d be another thing I’m always thinking of instead of what’s in front of me. And nobody gets my fascination with monsters like you do.”
“Senshi does…”
“I like you more than I like Senshi.”
“Why?”
Laios opens his mouth, teeth white and glistening in the soft flicker glow of dancing orange candle flame. You await his bite. He closes his mouth. You wish you were so confident to pry it wide and press yourself into his cheeks. You wish he’d just eat you whole. Spare no mind to how the others thought of it. If they won’t accept you bones and all, then you’ll continue to long for Laios. You can do that easily. You’ve been an expert in the matter since you joined his group.
“Nobody else will take me, Laios,” you greedily grasp him by the shoulder, “I’m being so selfish, but I need you to- !”
He slaps your hand away, reaching over your offending hands to snag you by your own shoulders, “I don’t want to hear that, you shouldn’t talk like that! You deserve to live, and eat, just like everyone else! We’re friends as much as we are party members, right? They wouldn’t stick around if they weren’t. Your friends wouldn’t want you to be eaten either.”
You glance at the archway, none of the three others are visible, “Is that why they were mad?”
“I can’t speak for them, but you should be up front about how you feel. Talk to them before leaving,” he lowers his head, “If you’re planning to leave still, anyway. Though, I really hope you stay.”
Laios is too afraid to say he’ll beg, if it would enrich the offer. The mere idea of your face twisting angrily or an annoyed rejection slipping past your lips kills him. With both you and Falin gone, Laios would feel a sense of estrangement he hasn’t since his army days. Loneliness amplifying until it's unable to be ignored. The grief and confusion of your loss would muddy the remaining friendly faces in his party -- the taste of monsters would even be dulled. Humiliation would rattle his sense of self everytime he remembered that you’re not even dead, just drifted away.
He’d never survive without you, but he refuses to steal your entire life that mercilessly so he pretends he could.
“If we all just talk to each other, then nobody has to get hurt,” Laios’ hands lower to yours, he squeezes gently while avoiding your eyes, choosing to study the way you lean into his touch, “I don’t want you to go. And I don’t want them to be hurt.”
“Okay,” you rise onto unsteady feet.
Laios separates from you to begin stowing away both your belongings while you squirm into the hallway in front of your party. They shuffle awkwardly, with only Senshi capable of meeting your eyes. Yet he stands the furthest from you.
“I- “ the words dance over your tongue, you thought you were prepared to say them. You’ll leave. You’ll leave. You’ll leave. But you can’t. The words trip and fall and tumble back into your throat before you surrender, “I don’t want to leave the party, but I am sorry for lying. I know I don’t do much, but I love adventuring with everyone. Really, I only- !”
“We were stressed,” Marcille steps forward, releasing one hand from Ambrosia to lay on your hand, “I don’t think it’d be easy on anyone to say the leftovers were actually gone. Especially when you knew that’s what we were relying on to not starve.”
Senshi nods slowly, “We weren’t expectin’ you to run off as apology. You’re young, you make mistakes.”
Marcille elbows your party’s half-foot.
Chilchuck sighs, shaking his hands out at his sides in the way your father used to, “I’m sorry. For calling you useless. I get why you lied, I probably would’ve done the same thing in your position to keep the party from freaking out. But, please,” his usually (deceptively) friendly and pleasant face has morphed into one of weary, a grown man concerned for a child, “Never say anything like that again. We don’t want you dead, let alone to eat your body. You have to plan to stay alive with everyone else, otherwise what’s the point of even joining the party?”
“Right. Sorry,” you blurt, increasingly ashamed of your suggestion earlier.
Their rejection stems not from disgust, then, but love.
They don’t want to eat you because to them you shouldn’t even die.
What a strange conclusion to now be forced to draw. You’re not sure how to swallow it, every time you try it rushes back up. Your friends’ concerned faces give you the determination to keep trying, though.
Laios barrels through the doorway -- redressed in his armor with the remaining bags slung over his shoulders, grinning broadly, “Looks like we can start walking again.”
Much to everyone’s chagrin, the trek towards the next floor begins on an empty stomach. When you reach up for the packs you usually carry, Laios jerks them from your grasp, you whine quietly, “Hey, that’s my job!”
“I know,” he shrugs the bags around his broad frame to fit them more comfortably, “but you haven’t eaten longer than me, and you didn’t sleep very well last night. So let me.”
His strides quicken until he’s by Senshi, you watch him point towards you and Senshi hums thoughtfully.
Your stomach rolls with hunger, and the sting makes you reach out for Laios. You slip your arms around one of his and cradle his elbow into your gut, reducing the ache with a different digging sensation. Laios leans towards you to make the work easier, all while continuing his conversation with Senshi about what the most delicious dungeon meal they could make you would be.
~~~
i like relationships where they dont understand each other but want to try anyway :3
i also love writing readers that are insane and fundamentally insufferable, but still loved
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halcyone-of-the-sea · 9 months
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PAIRING: Hunter!Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Werewolf!Reader
SYNOPSIS: There’s blood on your hands again.
WORDCOUNT: 16.8k
WARNINGS: Intense gore, body horror, death, mutilation, weapons, firearms, knives, intended harm, violence, blood, descriptions of wounds, angst, fluff, protective!Simon, religious mentions, period time standards for men/women (1700s), etc.
A/N: The first of my reverse AUs is finally here! Enjoy!
*I do not give others permission to translate and/or re-publish my works on this or any other platform*
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The tale of the Werewolf extends back to around 2100 BC. It was written in The Epic of Gilgamesh, scored into a clay tablet by hands long buried—a corpse forever still in the earth so deep, the bones have yet to be found by greedy eyes. Perhaps the oldest surviving story in human history, and there is still a passage that bleeds into stories hundreds of thousands of years later.
In such, Gilgamesh, a man on the search for immortality, rejects a woman for the reason of turning her previous husband into a wolf. 
“You have loved the shepherd of the flock; he made meal-cake for you day after day, he killed kids for your sake. You struck and turned him into a wolf, now his own herd-boys chase him away, his own hounds worry his flanks…”
And then, the tales spread, changed, through history and through spoken words of caution. Like water trickling from a well, down the shape of the wooden bucket delving deeper and deeper into a pit of age—of caution. 
“The Beast of Gévaudan. Man-eater.” Through France
“He has a wolf-head, you know? Tall thing—short brown hair all over him.” Through Scotland
“Beware the man that changes shape under the full moon.” England.
Now, in the late seventeenth century, it all comes to a head. Even the people in 2100 BC knew that someone who changes into a wolf, or some bastard-like imitation of one, was very much real; it is very much an affliction that overtakes sense and reason. A curse. 
Transferable down to the saliva of one entering your bloodstream.
You must never get within the beast’s sights. 
There’s blood on your hands again. 
Hunched over, your body quivers, and the bareness of your flesh in the moonlight is of little concern to you—trapped in a fetal position while the chilled wind howls.
Howls.
Howls.
“Get out of my head.” Your fingers grasp at your scalp, pulling; ripping. A sob jaggedly slashes your throat open. “Please,” you rattle in a fast breath, the grass snapping as you writhe. “Get out of my head.”
It had happened once more, and you can’t remember any of it. 
The forest is deathly still. No birds sing their songs—no breeze moves the long grass, patches trampled down around you as if a beast had staggered into the small clearing you’re lying in. Maybe it had. There are shadows that listen to your quiet panic, the low whines and gasping quivers of your throat; from behind the trees that speak in the way that only they could. The deep night creeps into you, and the moonlight bathing your flesh doesn’t push back the terror in your bloodstream. 
Your body burns like you’ve broken every bone twice over, and judging by the blood stuck in between every line and dip of your skin, to anyone walking past, the analogy could be very real. Fingers flexing and bending, you try to force out the venom inside of your head with desperation befitting a dying dog, spine visible out of the skin of your back as you sob all the harder. 
You tried to stop it—you had; you always do. But, just like every month when the full moon mocks you with its silver-hued face, it never works. 
It never works.
Your eyes stare at nothing as you lay here, in this place of grass, blood, and bile, of corruption as deep as a vile sin of flesh. It came over you like a wave, fingers trapping your throat and bearing it to the caress of fangs. There were different names for it here, miles from your village and the terrified eyes that search the tree line; names coming from the hunters and their black deeds. 
Shapeshifter.
Demon spawn.
Werewolf.
“I can’t take it anymore,” you shove the side of your head into the ground, pushing the torn earth away from the cuts of long claws. Tears flood the dirt until it’s wet and muddy, pushing the crimson stains on your skin away in long streaks. “It hurts, God, please, it hurts.”
The sound of your hysterics rises and falls in the stillness—the inactivity of fearful birds and beasts wondering if your fangs would rip from your gums and your claws would tear from your fingertips. Fur along your body the color of which leads to stories of their own spreading far and wide. 
The White Wolf. The Specter of St. Francis’ Village. A hound from Hell. 
More pale than snow, and sharper seen than a knife or blade through the black trees. Even if the memories of your shifts were fuzzy at best, there were flashes of those who’d seen your gargantuan form from the confines of their stone-cut homes. Those wide eyes. Yelling—screaming; sprays of blood as heads were separated from bodies—
“Stop!” You scream, your legs kicking out as your toes scrape the grass. “It’s not me! It’s not!” 
There’s a call of alarm from deep within the woods, the flash of torches and bellow of hunting dogs. They’re running you down, you’d forgotten that in the depths of your breaking mind and body, and by the time your elongated limbs had set themselves back into a more human-like appearance, your spine cracking at every vertebrae, it had slipped your thoughts entirely. It always took you a long time to understand what had happened after…everything. 
But even now, the shouts of the hunt are pointless to the visceral breaking of your consciousness, stuck between leaving bloodlust and knowledge of horror. There’s flesh in your teeth, and you wail before your fingers drag down your face, cupping over your ears. In the back of your skull, the panting of dogged breath echoes; running, blood, blood, blood. It’s a dance of fangs, of pale fur, staining every inch and flooding the back of your mouth. Drinking it down like water.
Flesh—lovely, disgusting, flesh rent and torn to the bone with smacking gums belonging to a square snout. 
Who had you killed this time?
By the time the dogs had tracked your scent to your curled body, it was already too late. 
“Here!” Male voices shift in and out on the backs of crows, hard and cruel. “It’s here!”
“Get the dogs on it!” 
“It’s not me,” you mutter incessantly, not truly understanding what you’re saying as hounds burst through the bushes, all snapping teeth and slobbering tongues your eyes widen in an instant. Panting, your jaw clenches; long whines move your throat. 
“What…?” Blinking quickly, the dogs surround you—having to be at least ten of them on their nimble legs and thin tails. Everything is distant to you; separated. A knife could be driven through your heart, and you wouldn’t even realize it until minutes later, bleeding out on the grass. 
The hounds are afraid of you. 
They dart forward and balk back, your scent driving them up a wall until rabid slobber drips from their maws. Torchlight pulls through the trees—quicker now, running. Fangs nick your shoulder and you yell, shoving up to your backside as the world swirls, shuffling away as the dogs snarl. Their eyes are red-huen. Drunk off fear and order. 
Your head darts and shifts, blood dripping off your chin to travel down the flesh of your stomach and navel—so much crimson that the whites of your eyes are violent under the moon. Hands slipping over the wet grass, your face pulls and slackens in delirious confusion as you try to stand but fail. You cry out in sharp pain, and the dogs go wild in their kill circle, nearly attacking one another in anticipation. 
You glance down and see the black crossbow bolt sticking out of your thigh. 
The scent of wolfsbane in the air only then becomes clear to you, and the realization is slow. Wolfsbane—you’d been told about it by the village priest. It makes beasts of the night dumb and weak; minds unclear. 
In a moment of clarity, the reason behind your incurable hysteria becomes clear.
Lungs heaving and eyes far-off, the hunting party bursts through to where you stay, and you look up in animalistic fear. Figures dip and slip into one another, faces becoming demons as the visages melt into twos and threes. You yell out, sniffling and sobbing, trying to back up until the hounds grapple onto your shoulder and rip a chuck out of your arm. Screaming, your hand moves back, shoving at its snout before hands staple themselves to your wrist. 
“No!” You wail, injured leg dragging as you’re forced back into a heavy chest. Hot breath fans against your neck as multiple grips pull and touch you—shackling you down with rope and chains. Your throat screams itself raw, kicking and struggling futility. “Let go!”
You’re too weak—too drugged off wolfsbane and blood loss. Rotting teeth move across the canvas of a smeared painting, you can’t focus beyond the riot of your heart inside of your ribs.  
Grubby hands snap under your chin, digging into your flesh as you cry, not able to move as the restraints are tightened. A silver muzzle is slapped over your jaw. Dark eyes shimmer as you rage—aggravating the bolt wound until fresh blood forms a puddle on the ground, which the dogs lick their lips at. 
“Look at that,” a low, lust-filled voice eases out, and hands around your body tightening as you squirm, head spinning. Silver and wolfsbane. Your eyes snap to fight the sudden flood of fuzzy heaviness in your body.  “Pretty little Hell-Beast, eh? Almost seems a bit strange to have the Spector be her. Think that hunter shot the right bitch?”
“Course,” another grunt, a hand grabs the top of your head, jerking it up as your head lulls along with the force. You can barely focus on the words being said. “He isn’t a fuckin’ twat. Killed a werewolf in the next village over, too. Heard he skinned the fucker and took its head for his mantlepiece—just like the vampire skull he wears.” A pause. The dogs are still barking—echoing out in the trees. You can’t feel your legs. “Isn’t that right, Hunter?!”
A shout is sent into trees as your panic breeds with the drug, eyelids drooping as your head is snapped and moved by your hair. Your buggy eyes don’t focus on the man until he steps into the torchlight, the crowd parting for him as the metal of your chains drags and clinks together. 
It’s as if the very blackness of night takes human form. 
The man, the Hunter, is tall—very tall. He looms like an aloof animal over most of the others here with his dark boots and his black hood, and yet, under the fabric, there is no whisper of his face. 
Only the upper visage of a pure white skull, and two long, needle-pointed teeth where canines should be. 
“Ghost,” one of the men laughs, groping at your bleeding thigh before you shriek, muffled from behind the muzzle, and weakly kicked out. “Good shot, Mate. Right in the meat of the thing. Gave a good trail for the hounds.” 
Ghost blinks slowly, grunting under his breath as the large crossbow in his hands is shifted. He stays silent as your visible pulse hurries on as if you were a rabbit and not a wolf, watching from under the cover of his hood. The darkness of his clothes is blue in the moon—silver buttons down the length of a loose shirt and pants stuffed into boots. The hood is attached to a jacket, which itself extends down to his knees and sways lightly with every shift. The silent resting of weapons and tools is not lost to anyone. 
Belt of filled vials and large knives; a firearm over his back, and two pistols hidden on either thigh. That crossbow was still in his hands.
Brown eyes openly dig into your soul, dead as a corpse, and your voice whines as your thigh is finally released with a laugh. Your vision blacks and comes back a moment later as you try to breathe from behind the muzzle, gasping. That skull on his face…you don’t like it. It scares you. 
And the Hunter only continues to watch numbly as his wide shoulders stay stationary.
“Get the cage!” Someone roars, and you flinch, shrinking until a dog with short fur comes and nips at your ankles, the man holding you grinning sharply as you sob and shake.
“C’mon—expected more of a fight from you, Spector. Getting bullied by dogs, now? Ain’t that a twist of fate, then. Bet this devil’s whore can’t even walk with all that wolfsbane in ‘er, eh?”
A grumble of chuckles as the rattle of metal is in the distance. You grow more fearful, mind flashing to a burning stake and the trials you’d seen in village after village. No—no they can’t put you in a cage; they can’t put you on trial.
They’re going to make it hurt.
“Say we try it out.” A shadow comes closer and grabs you by the arm, ruthlessly shoving you to the ground. You cry out as your spine meets the earth, arms and legs kept under chains that tangle and screech in their metallic way. The rope that holds the muzzle pulls against your neck until you can’t breathe except in ragged wheezes. 
“Go on,” they taunt, some holding back the rampaging dogs just to watch you flail and shimmy. Your face grows hot as you struggle to sit up—shaking so violently you can’t focus on anything but the quiver. “Put on a show for us, Beasty!” 
Death would be better than this.
Tears hit the ground as the cage is finally brought into view, the men all groaning and annoyed that you hadn’t even attempted a forced shift or a desperate run into the trees. 
Ghost’s fingers, you notice from the side of your blurring eye, tighten minutely around the body of his weapon. You do not doubt that he’s wondering if it would be easier to just put a bolt through your eye right now. 
“Get it loaded up,” the Hunter’s voice is accented and gravel-like. As if rotting wood is being peeled back and scraped along gravel, he stares at you for a long moment and then glances at the dogs. “And get those fucking mutts under control.”
“Which one?” Is the low-blow joke, and the ruckus of loud amusement that follows makes you want to die. 
It’s not your fault, how do you tell them that? It’s not your fault.
Your throat bobs in an attempt to speak, but you can’t move your jaw from behind the restraint of your face—held tight to you as the men come back over and grapple for you again. The priest was right, wolfsbane makes werewolves sluggish.
You can do nothing as you’re ruthlessly dropped into a silver cage, borrowed, no doubt, from the Vatican itself, and christened with holy water. But it was a funny thing, really, and the dark humor wasn’t lost to you even like this. There was nothing godly about this contraption.
Locked in, you shove yourself immediately into a corner and hunch over, grasping at your thigh as the bolt still leaks fluid in a long trail over the ground. The pain is so great in your head, that the physical agony is little—a bullet wound to a sliver. 
Your temple slams into the metal, smacking into it as your eyes shove themselves closed. 
Head hurts—hurts. I can’t think. Can’t think. It’s humming, my skull is breaking open.
Bile pools in the back of your throat, but the muzzle keeps it in, leaving you gagging as the cage is lifted with a grunt and carried by long poles; back to St. Francis' Village, no doubt, but you can’t…focus.
“Think you might ‘ave given her too much, then, Hunter,” one calls, slapping Ghost on the shoulder as the crowd follows after the panicking quarry. The large man only gives him a look from the side of his eye and the villager pulls away immediately, awkwardly chuckling before hurrying off after the others.
Brown eyes watch your bare body hunch and spasm, pupils wide as you’re carted off. 
He’d been generous with the wolfsbane, truth be told. He’d expected you to be…Ghost’s dark brows pull in from behind his grim mask…he’d expected you to be different.
Humming under his breath, the Hunter watches the torches disappear into the trees and lets his gaze linger on you. 
There was something…off.
Blinking, he turns, eyes studying the place where they’d found you with sharp attention that misses nothing—not even the birds that come back to settle into the trees again. Large boots shift through the grass, and as he’s re-settling the crossbow in his hands, his eyes find something glinting. 
Watching, Ghost takes another step and brings his body to the item in the grass, hidden, before he kneels. Digging with large digits, the Hunter’s hands loop through the chain of a necklace, dragging it through the torn earth until he can gaze at it fully under the light of the moon.
Blinking in slight surprise, Ghost finds the body of a silver bullet hanging from the confines of a leather strap. Brown eyes shifting to look over his shoulder, the man listens to the cheers and merriment of the hunting party mutely. A simmering understanding brews in his gut. It’s only one that you could know from years of experience doing just as he had—hunting and being hunted in turn with a knowledge of all things dark and unholy.
It could never be easy, could it?
A low grunt later, the man sighs out a deep, “Fucking hell,” and moves to slowly stand, slinking back into the darkness. 
They kept you in the cage and set it on display in the middle of town for days.
Shivering now from the cold more than the wolfsbane, you stay collapsed into yourself as people come past to poke and prod at you—even sticking knives into the slits of the cage and digging them into you like an animal until your flesh was marked and brutalized. 
You don’t remember what it’s like to not be bloody.
The bolt wound was festering; infected. You dare not touch it, because the pain only makes you want to vomit, and if you do, you’ll most likely suffocate on your own bile before the trial ever happens. 
Yet, on the fourth night of this, as your eyelids flutter and your body grows weaker, a shadow comes to visit. 
“You weren’t born one.” It isn’t a question, but the sudden voice makes you startle. 
Eyes locking onto Ghosts’, your mind flies with fear—thinking that perhaps there’s more abuse that you’ll be put through. But no…the man has no weapons on him tonight. Only a long knife at his belt. The mask stays. 
You stare, unable to speak as your fingers twitch.
Grunting, Ghost’s head tilts, gaze moving up and down as you curl in tighter around yourself. A cold breeze rips through the square, and your eyes clench closed with breaking will. When you open them again, the Hunter is kneeling by the cage, and holding up something in his hand loosely. 
“You going to behave if I take that muzzle off?” You nearly gasped at the hanging image of your necklace—a silver bullet on a leather strap; that dark and heavy thing usually kept around your neck. A reminder.
After a moment of wide-eyed staring, you nod quickly to his question, a desperate, pleading thing without the need to utter words. Please, you want to scream at him, take it off.
Ghost’s eyes are as dark as a mound of dirt, sharply intelligent and filled with an unflinching reality. He doesn’t care what you are, and he won’t until you speak to him and let him judge your character far before any courtroom can. The man knows what a lie is better than any priest. 
“Good,” he says curtly, accent far more deep as he thinks, re-capturing the bullet in his palm and standing before he shuffles it into his pocket. 
You can’t help the anxiety as Ghost moves forward, loping to the side of the cage with the side of his eyes on you incessantly. It’s obvious how his other hand lays limp on the hilt of his blade that, with only one wrong move, you’d feel the chill of the edge with no time at all. 
But the temptation of getting this muzzle off was too good to ruin, and so, you stay as still as you’re able as crows call in the distance and the deadness of the town leaks into your blood. 
Ghost moves his free hand and orders, blankly, “Closer.” 
You hesitate, body tight before you drag your face closer to the bars, angling it parallel with the metal so the tight bind on the back can be taken up. The fear can be smelt the second your eyes have to break contact with his with the turn of your head—neither of you trusts the other. 
Ghost hums under his breath at the sight of your broken body coming farther into the open light of the moon, the whites of your eyes all the more visible from under the slathering of blood and tears. He hadn’t been absent to witness the abuse you’d been put through, even if the coin from his successful hunt was feeding him at the inn, a small window allowed the tight view of your torment at the hands of the people you’d once lived around. 
But the reality was that you’d killed people—scores of them—and yet the worst part of it was that he wasn’t sure if you even knew that.
It took four nights for him to break his only rule: never get involved after the job’s done.
But the hunch he had was too important to ignore. 
Large fingers latch onto the knot at the base of your skull through the cage itself, Ghost grunting at the sight ahead of him. The rope had been gradually chafing over your flesh, peeling back hair and skin until only the bloody meat was left—Simon had to wonder if the people of this village even wanted you alive for the trial or not at this rate. You’d be dead by tomorrow if that infected bolt at your thigh wasn’t taken care of.
Despite himself, a part of his chest tightens at the sight of the thing sticking out of your leg, dripping a yellowish puss. It had been a good shot, and he had overcoated the bolt in wolfsbane. 
Ghost hadn’t expected you to be so susceptible to it—most werewolves only got slower, but you…you seemed to have a stronger reaction. He files that fact away and tilts his masked face to the side. 
Grasping at his blade, the sound of a knife being slipped out of a sheath makes you startle, jerking your head back and shoving away even as your muffed whine of pain falls out. Ghost momentarily readies himself for an attack, but the way you force your mangled body to the opposite corner has him grumbling out a hard, “Easy.” 
The Hunter raises the blade, watching you with unblinking eyes. Your body shakes; panting. It was like calming a feral dog.
“You want the thing off or not? Have to cut it.” Once more, the man rises and walks over, boots almost silent over the small raised platform the cage had been set on like a trophy, you inside are comparable to the golden coins that greedy eyes touch and run their dirty hands over. 
Your mind is a troubled thing as you watch this Hunter and his crude knife come closer, kneeling again, and motioning with two fingers to shift your head. 
“Out ‘ere,” Ghost says, brown eyes not letting you guess anything about his true motives. “Don’t have time to fuck around. Guards’ll make a round soon and I’d rather not get caught wide-eyed.” 
Your brows pull in, hands clenching and unclenching in your lap as goosebumps travel the length of every limb. You were tired—hungry and thirsty; there were open wounds that burned with infection and ones that were crusted over with dirt and grime. You can’t feel your toes, and the tips of your fingers have long since gone numb. 
The thought of getting this muzzle off was like the promise of heaven being dangled in front of your nose. Your hesitation this time is far longer than the first, moonlight glinting off the visible blade in Ghost’s hand as he stares. That mask holds death. 
The hood is gone from him—only that pale bone left and sewn into dark, dark, fabric. The sharpness of the teeth leaves your throat bobbing in a nervous swallow as your head carefully shifts to rest on the bars. Bending, you present the knot once more and try not to focus on the way Ghost’s attention is fully on your expanding lungs; the pulse that is seen through the meat of your neck. 
But he says nothing before his fingers once more grasp the rope and the tip of the knife slips up. You don’t even feel it before the sudden slackening of the muzzle, and then the thing slips from your face before it slaps the bottom of the cage with a dull thump. 
The first thing you do is vomit. 
Spine pulling in, your body jerks as the bile that had been in the back of your throat rockets out, restrained hands slapping the ground as the acidic concoction leaks from between your torn lips. Face on fire, you choke and retch for what seems like minutes before you can finally breathe in the damp air—the innate shame and disgust rolling through as you cough raggedly. 
It’s only after you’d forgotten the man kneeling outside that he seems to remind you of his presence with a grumble. 
“Breathe. It’s no use if you can’t speak to me.”
A weak, quivering glare comes across your eyes, saliva dripping off your chin as your tongue moves to lick at your lips. But the brown gaze is as immovable as stone. Finding it pointless, your hands come up and delicately touch the base of your skull, only making you flinch when the fresh blood pools down and over your neck, licking at your shoulders. Tiny droplets fall to hit the metal one at a time. 
Ghost’s fingers twitch as he puts the knife away. 
“Who bit you?” You stare at him, hands falling before your wrists rub at the aggravated skin of your jaw. He shifts his head, voice slow but heavy. “Speak.”
“...I’m not a dog,” your voice is scratchy, hoarse. You send a small glance his way, mouth open and nostrils flaring in an attempt to bring in the oxygen you’d been lacking. 
“Really?” A hidden eyebrow is slowly raised. “Hell, coulda fooled me.” 
“Damn you,” you whisper, not meeting his gaze as you shuffle back. The crossbow bolt catches on one of the cage’s bars and you bite on your lip to stop the shrill yell that threatens to exit. Head moving, you lightly slam your skull into the wall in pain. 
Breath hitched, you clench your trembling jaw tight. 
“Speak or don’t,” Ghost grunts, and he makes a move to stand. “Your funeral.” 
A spark of fear stabs you as he begins to shift, and you can’t explain why. Perhaps it was because it was the first conversation you can remember having lately that wasn’t one-sided or on the edge of a blade.
“W-wait,” you stutter, blinking through the blood. The Hunter doesn’t slow, and then he’s on his feet and fixing the gloves over his fingers, flexing his hands before his foot begins to pivot— 
“Please, don’t go,” your voice is thin and pleading, echoing through the street. “I’ll answer your questions, any of them you want,” the sentence cracks through a dry throat, tears welling. “Please, don’t leave me here alone.” 
Ghost had half of his body turned away before it went rigid; the side of his dead eyes flash to you, swirling with specs of moonlit silver. A hunter and a werewolf lock gazes, great beasts respectively brought together in seconds that seep into slow minutes of delicate need.
Knowledge and company. Understanding and a horrible fellowship. 
The Hunter’s eyes twitch in their ever-narrow resting place, glancing away before he mutely moves back to where he was before. 
He wastes no time.
“Who bloody bit you?” 
You stifle a pathetic sigh of great relief, taking company with a man who had shot you not days before. Yet the ability to speak and be heard was a commodity that was dimming each and every day.
“It was already fully turned,” you speak quickly, tongue tripping. “A big wolf—a gray one with eyes like the sky.” 
Ghost glares to the side. Gray? There were no contracts for gray werewolves with blue eyes in the area. Only you—only Specter. The next question is just as stiff. 
“When?”
“Three years ago,” your lips move. “Only three years, I promise.” Brown eyes narrow slowly, fingers tapping the fabric of his pants once before he makes a noise in the back of his throat. Ghost’s jaw clenches, mind working through the hoops that need to be jumped. 
To you, the questions might seem pointless, but to a hunter, they were important—very important. Werewolves who are born afflicted with this moon-drunkenness are different from those turned by a bite. Not only are shifts from turned werewolves more violent, more deadly, but they rarely know their own actions from that of the frenzy under their skin; those that are born as such are rarely out of control, unlike your faction. 
The only question now was if Ghost could condemn you to death when it was obvious your human form was entirely different and you had no semblance of an idea of what was going on. Was it even his problem to care about? Even looking at you now, the man blinked away from cuts and inflicted injuries—the muzzle on the ground. 
The blood and the bolt.
He’d known it had been a foolish play to bring all of those townsfolk with him on this hunt but he needed their knowledge of the terrain; he hadn’t passed through St. Francis’ before. At the time, Ghost hadn’t been averse to assistance as long as he got the job done in his own fashion: capture or kill, the contract had stated. Rarely was he known for capture.
Maybe, deep down, he’d known something was already wrong about this.
“Show me it,” the Hunter grunts, staring you down, a deep anticipation growing in his bones. He had to make sure you weren’t lying.
You lick your lips, face pulling with every twitch and sway of your form. The black at the edges of your vision was coming back, and you blinked quickly, chains dragging before you shifted your back with a quivering breath. The punctures were difficult to see through all of the gore, but Ghost made do as he grabbed at the waterskin at his waist and the rag hanging from his belt. 
Flooding the fabric in the lukewarm water, he hums out a firm, “Don’t move. Cleanin’ it,” before you feel the press of the rag to your back. 
Gasping lightly, you almost jerk away before the sensation becomes a nearly welcomed one—the drag and slight scrape of rough material. Your averted eyes dip lower, staring at nothing as your heart momentarily slows to a normal pace. Ghost cleans the areas where the swell of scar tissue is the most obvious, and, one by one, the violent groves spread out like a slash of paint over canvas. Along the left side of your waist, the blood gives way to a dented ‘v’ shape of healed punctures. Deep, dragging; a point to where your side was almost ripped away before it broke off swiftly. 
Ghost’s dark eyes fight the need to widen, and that hidden blankness stays. 
A great gray wolf with blue eyes…
His mask tilts, head shifting as his gaze moves slowly. Gloved fingers twitch to touch them, moving in an almost examining way that befits a surgeon and not a decapitator. Your breath is held in the back of your throat, but you sag nearly entirely into the bars of the cage, growing more unsteady by the second. 
The scent of infection is so strong it makes your head burn, and you’re overtaken by it as Ghost’s presence suddenly disappears. 
You don’t know if it’s minutes or hours before you understand that you’re alone again, but when your limp neck finally turns to wonder where your silent captor is, you are greeted with nothing but moonlight. Blinking through the sludge behind your eyes, the sinking in your gut was stark and sudden—like a knife dragging itself from gullet to navel. 
But all you offer is a light whine as more blood moves to cover the places where Ghost’s rag had just cleaned. You were scared of him, no doubt. A hunter through and through down to the vampiric skull on his face and the shroud of death at every inch of his form. 
He’d shot you and drugged you with wolfsbane. Found your necklace. 
So why had he talked to you?
Your head is too muddled for this, too delicate. Like the crimson under your nails, it dries and flakes off of your brain as the lack of distraction breeds stored agony. There wasn’t anything left to focus on besides the upcoming trial, your death, and the pain that doesn’t let you sleep except for now, on the brink of not rest but unconsciousness. 
And at the sound of a key being slotted into the silver of your cage’s door, only then does your body slump with the weight of doom. 
You don’t even feel the hand that grasps at your ankle.
The sway of the horse makes your teeth clatter with every clop of hooves. 
Your conscience mostly comes and goes, only staying in thin seconds where you feel the press of clean bandages on your afflicted flesh and the tipping of warm broth into your mouth. Grass under your head. 
Blankets being shuffled over your clothed body when you shiver. 
When you’re finally able to speak, when the horse is moving along and hands keep your back stuck to a strong chest, it’s a low, garbled, “Ow.”
Ghost barely blinks down to your head as it slumps to the gait of his horse, glancing before his attention returns to the thin forest trail ahead of him. You’d made noises in your sleep often enough—this was no different except for the fact he felt your shoulders flex.
Slowing the horse with a pull on the reins, the dappled mare settles to a walk. 
“You up, then?” Ghost hums, his hand around your waist tightening as you groan under your breath. “Good. Thought I was dragging a corpse—would have wasted my bandages.” 
Your eyes shudder as they open into the light, having to focus on moving them before the sting of the sun makes them water. But you do, and then the confusion outweighs the numb stinging of tended wounds. 
Head shifting, you look behind you slowly with wide eyes as the horse under both of you snorts.
Brown eyes watch you before a dark brow twitches upward. “What is it?” 
You just blink, mouth slightly open. 
“Where…am I?” 
“Forest.” Ghost states matter-of-factly. 
If you had the energy to glare, you would have. Seeing that nothing will get the man into a proper conversation—he was a brick wall even now—you look down at yourself and land on the scarred forearm that keeps you secure on the saddle. Ghost’s gloves were still on, but the sleeve of his dark shirt had ridden back to his upper forearm, and in the wake of pale skin, you find the black ink of all manner of warfare. 
Werewolf skulls; vampire fangs and fire. The slash of inkish chains with skeletons. 
Your lips thin, your senses slowly becoming your friend again as you stare at the snarling face of a needle-hewn wolf. Eyes tightening as the horse moves to the left, your body follows the reactive action before Ghost’s pressure tightens once more, visibly veins behind the pale flesh. You move on, seeing the thin tunic and pants over your body—feeling under that, the bind of wrappings with the scents of mashed yarrow leaves in the fabric. 
They’d been re-applied recently, too. 
“Stay still unless you want to re-open them,” Ghost utters, eyes scanning the trees for unseen threats. It was midday by now, the sun high above the trees watching the both of you on your trek to seemingly nowhere. “We’re far enough away, but I want more distance before I take the time to close them fully.”  
“The trial,” your arm moves up, fingers grazing the side of your nose before it falls back down. Ghost can feel the air heat with unease. “The…the cage?”
“Trial was two days ago,” he draws, thighs shifting over the saddle. “Give or take.” 
The confession isn’t as shocking now that you have woken up here, but the lack of remembrance on your part of that time startles you. It’s a blank slate—just like the aftermath of your shifts. You don’t like not knowing. 
The next question comes out with a haggard cough, sweat dripping off your nose. “Why?”
“You’re going to tell me ‘bout the werewolf that made you,” the Hunter grunts. “And you can’t speak if you’re lit up like a pig on a spit. Took you the night we met in the square.” 
Through it all, Ghost barely looks at you—always his attention keeps to the trees and the shadows that linger; seeming to listen. He knows more than anyone that they do. 
The horse continues on, your pain surfaces again, and with a shuddering breath, you fall into a fitful sleep once more. The arm around your body tightens, and the warmth it lends is accented when Ghost’s shifting gaze glances at the top of your head. He wears an expression he can’t name yet.
When the throws of fever pull their curtains back for the last time, it shows you the slats of the attic above your head, wood polished and clean as the heat of fire moves over your body. Pulling a large inhalation of air into your lungs, you blink softly as if clearing away cobwebs with a broom—willing sense to return in the few seconds it had flown away. 
The furs are warm. 
In the village, you weren’t anyone of standing. A simple woman—unwed, and, thus, unimportant due to the era the world sees itself in. It wasn’t all bad…namely, it hid your affliction far longer than you could have hoped it did. You had a small piece of family land passed down to you on the edge of the village, and that was where you stayed. Nothing fancy; a hearth, a large, single-room property with a garden and a well. You were known to keep sheep, a fact that had caused perhaps a few hysterical chuckling fits when, every full moon, one or two went missing, but it gave you the ability to accumulate money and, more importantly, an alibi. 
Who would suspect a werewolf to own sheep?
But this home already had a more detached feel to it—something removed. The air was sterile, somehow. Groaning, your face tightens before you rise to the palms of your hands, muscles quivering to keep the strength your stubbornness gives to them. Half-vertical, you turn and study the area. 
Square, the four walls are stone with mortar and clay to keep the rounded blobs together. You’re on the ground floor, a staircase to the far right while the bed is stuck into the left corner; a nightstand sitting void of all except a single chamber-wick holding an unused candle. A sturdy table with one wooden chair, a stone fireplace set into the same wall the headboard is level with, and a large oak door.
There are runes written on it. 
You can’t make sense of what they mean, but when you see them, your tiny-pupiled eyes slip to the rest, all placed at windows or near some point of entry—unassuming things until you realize why they were red in color.
Your shoulders tighten, and whatever bit of magic moves through your skin lets your nose pull to the scent of human blood. 
You clear your throat and look away, licking your lips with a dry tongue. Moving your toes under the two bear furs that rest at your abdomen, you notice the lack of earth-shattering pain that accompanies it, and, shifting a hesitant hand, you grab the edge and push it back a bit farther. 
Bandages with perfect ties meet you, void of any crimson staining. 
Truth be told, you expected more of a Hunter’s home—skulls; trophies. The town always spoke of burnt bodies strung up on crosses that mark the property of those in this profession, a ward and a sign of grim hope. Vampires mostly, wasting away in the brutal sun. Others as well. Werewolf fur and witch bones shoved in blessed boxes. 
This place is almost normal, you think, thighs shifting over the dip of the bed as your finger runs the white wrappings where the bolt should be. Your mind dares not go to how he got the thing out of you, and at the stretch of sutures, you take your curious grip off of it entirely. 
Looking around once more, your brows furrowed tightly. 
Where was the man? The hunter responsible for your current predicament? Ghost. With his vampire skull mask and his black attire—a hellhound with dark ink and intentions. More importantly…
Why were you still alive?
Your memories come back slowly as you stand, bare feet moving to the floor as the tunic over your upper half falls to your knees at the verticality of your spine. They creak a bit, the bones, at the ability to stand fully upwards and not be impaired by bars of silver. A strength seeps through you slowly. 
In the deafening silence, you clear your throat tinily and lightly itch at the clean flesh at the back of your neck where the muzzle sat; rubbed raw now scabbed and healing with the spread of natural oil balms. Taking in a slow breath, you step forward with a heavy limp and watch the door, glancing at locked trunks and cupboards, eyes blinking. Your muscles ached, but the sting only served as a way to remind you that you were still here—living. Few in your position were granted second chances. 
You’re about to study the runes at the door when you’re called to with the creak of the stairs in your left ear. 
“Wouldn’t recommend it.” Your head snaps over, blinking quickly. 
Ghost carries the leather holders of his twin pistols in one hand, the bodies of the weapons in them hanging as he comes to ground level one step at a time. Brown eyes glance over through the confines of his skeletal face-covering as he walks to the table, placing down the items. 
“Keeps the spirits out—smudge ‘em and the house gets haunted,” he grunts. “Rather not bleed myself again to get the runes copied.” 
You stare in mild shock, sound sparking from the back of your throat. “...Right.” 
Side-eyeing the markings, you shiver and step back from the door, silent as Ghost seems to focus on his task at hand—looking over his weapons.
Large hands running the metal and wood, the pistols in his grip shift as the drying light of the day streams in through the curtains of the windows. He touches them intimately, knowing every grove and dip until he tilts one and rubs away a slash of dirt from the barrel with his bare thumb. 
You quickly turn awkward, looking down at yourself and the bareness of your lower legs. It wasn’t lost to you that the man was the reason you were in this situation in the first place. 
“You shot me,” you grumble—not unlike someone who had a knife to their throat. 
“Affirmative,” Ghost says nonchalantly. You get a slow, blank glance and nothing more. 
“Have you drugged me?” You ask, heart speeding up. There wasn’t anywhere to go—not without an escape plan and with Ghost in front of you.
“Wolfsbane?” The Hunter shifts his thighs, boots moving over the hardwood. “Negative. Not yet.” 
“Yet?” An attitude seeps in, lips thinning. 
Ghost sighs under his breath, slipping the pistols back into their holsters. “Forgetting about how we met, Love?” 
“No,” you huff. “Not really.”
“Perfect.” Eyelids pull down slightly. “Don’t.” Ghost nods his head to the table's chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “Sit.” 
“I told you I’m not a—” A sharp, numb look makes your snappy reply stall itself, and you stand there for more than a minute before you find the pointlessness of this.
You limp forward and sit in the chair.
Looping your arms around your waist, you glare to the side as your skin crawls at the unblinking eyes that stare. Ghost rolls his shoulders, tilting his head. 
“What do you know about the werewolf that bit you beyond appearance?” 
“Nothing,” you chuckle hopelessly, moving a finger in confusion. “I…I don’t know why you’re asking me about it—it’s not like I had a conversation with him.”
The Hunter blinks at your sudden confidence, unable to separate your form now from the one in the cage; blubbering ceaselessly in a grassy clearing. But lesser pains always bring out someone's true colors. As long as you told him what he needed to know.
Ghost explains with a sheen of dull annoyance. “Every turned werewolf holds a connection to the one that bit them. It’s pack mentality.” At your blank look, his brows pull in, the mask shifting. “You telling me you’ve never come back into contact?”
“...No?” Your lips dip. “For three years I’ve been by myself with this.” 
Brown digs into your face, a small sheen of confusion slipping in to tighten them, around his biceps, Ghost’s fingers twitch. 
You lick your lips, speaking up in the impending silence. “I don’t remember anything after I turn. Is that normal?”
“For you?” He mutters, still not taking his eyes off of you. “Yes.” 
“I’m not going to pretend like I know what’s going to happen,” you shrug. “But at the very least I want to try and understand why I’m like this.” You open and close your mouth for a moment. “Before you kill me, anyways.” 
“If I wanted you dead,” Ghost grunts through a half-amused tilt of his head. He doesn’t beat around the bush. “...You would be.” 
“‘Capture or kill,’” you huff. You’d seen the flyers; heard from word of mouth. “Right.” You sigh. “They’ll track you down, you know. They’re not going to just let you take me.”
“They won’t make it through the forest. Bastards would get lost on the trail.” The Hunter moves until he can grasp the waterskin from the counter, dragging it over with his hand. He tosses it to the main table in your direction after he comes back over, and you hesitantly reach forward and pull the top off. Ghost changes the subject back to his studies of your condition closely. Dark eyes slip down your front as your lips part to take up the liquid. “Before your shift, tell me what you see.”
Your throat bobs as you drink the water, thirsty as it soothes your dry mouth. You hum, but the inquiry makes your hair rise. Your arm wipes at your mouth as you lower the waterskin, a small thankfulness in your heart. “It’s less of what I see and more of what I hear and smell—blood; metal. River water. I…” Your chest tightens. “I feel my bones breaking and I hear howling mixing with whispers.”
“Whispers?” Ghost leans, eyes alighting with dim interest. “What’re they saying?”
“I try to block it out,” you whisper, not exactly answering. “Makes it go faster.” 
A long nothingness ensues. 
The impending night grows deeper, and then Ghost finally speaks again after you begin to shift with unease. He nods firmly, tilting his head as if it’s already been decided. 
“Next full moon, you’re going to listen to them.” 
Your horrified face snaps up. It’s a moment of stuttering before you force out a heavy, “What? No!”
He’s already turned, moving back over to the stairs and placing one foot on the steps. 
“Ghost!” You yell, face devoid of blood.
He side-eyes you. “Go back to bed. You’re dead on your feet.” 
And then the same man who shot you in the thigh with little remorse disappears into the attic.  
The Hunter was a strange beast.
The days the two of you spent together were mostly silent—left with tight stares and tense shoulders. Clipped sentences. 
Ghost, for what it was worth, gave you space in this small house; as much as you could get. He kept himself up above while you stayed on ground level keeping yourself occupied. You’d gotten spare trousers and socks, a jacket, and the bed was practically yours with how your scent rolled off of it now. Yet, you had never been permitted to go outside. 
You’d seen the land from the windows—careful of the runes, of course, and it wasn’t anything… ghastly. A vegetable garden, a single-stall stable with a dappled mare, and a beaten-down trail out the front. 
No livestock.
No bodies. 
It was only when you had become ever more curious about your lupine curse that you braved the stairs to the attic—one week into the impromptu stay. It’s funny due to the fact that Ghost had never said that you couldn’t go up there sooner.
You stand now in the flat room with a sloping roof and find the man making bullets. It’s a long table, parallel to the walls in the center of the room; dark and covered in all manner of books and tomes. Grimoires tied up and locked. Racks of weapons with markings and blessings tied to sheets of ribbon…it was something you’d never seen before. 
Studying it now, the contents were a dark fascination. 
Ghost fiddles with his silver shell, mixing in gunpowder into the hollowness. He doesn’t speak until you do, but he knows you’re there.
“Tell me more about werewolves,” you speak through the air, and he waits before answering. “The ones who are born with it.”
“Rare,” Ghost comments, and you’re stuck by how willing he is to tell you about this. He puts down his bullet and picks up another. “Harder to find, even harder to kill. Unlike you, they know what goes on when they’re running ‘round. Fuckin’ nightmare to pick up the pieces—bloodbath.” You thin your lips. “Not all of ‘em are murderous, but they’re unpredictable. Can’t help but make packs.”
“Instinct,” you murmur, coming a bit closer. Ghost pauses, looking at you before huffing in the form of a gruff ‘yes.’ Your wondering continues. “But why am I alone then?”
“That’s the question,” the hunter says slowly. “Need to figure out why.” Brown eyes slowly move to you. “‘Fore more people end up dead. Or turned.”
“Can I,” you stop at the table, standing opposite the man. “Can I turn people, too?”
“No,” is all you’re given. Ghost’s eyes glint. “And I’d rather you didn’t bite on me to try.”
Your face heats.
Your attention focuses for a while on how he works—prepares for something unseen. He’d said he’d kept you alive to help him find the one who bit you, but he’d also cleaned your infected injuries, bandaged you, and fed you. Kept you warm. Safe. It was far more than could be said about your village.
However, it was strange how Ghost’s stark muteness was something that you found in the darker hours, a small comfort. When the moon was coming in from the windows, and you hid from its rays as if being stalked down, he once found you sleeping under the bed on the floor because of it.
He never said anything, just offered you a silent hand and helped you back out with a slow blink and a tilt of his head.
There was a distrust, obviously, but there was also an unspoken nearness. No one would make any sense of it—you couldn’t either. It was like a wolf and a raven; something built on hesitence but necessity. You didn’t like Ghost’s mask or his brutalist profession of shooting his wolfsbane-coated bolts, and he didn’t like that once a month you turned into a rampaging werewolf. 
Comparable things, really. 
But even here, in this workshop in his attic, you saw the need for this—for hunters. If you couldn’t stop yourself, there came a time when you had to be stopped. Truth be told, you expected it to be a quick and final end. Maybe that was just a foolish hope. 
A silver bullet would have always been your final song, you believed. Perhaps the very one that had once swung from around your neck; the one you’d never taken off until now. 
But then, perhaps that would have been your own brutalist profession.
“Thank you,” you nod. Ghost pauses, fingers stained with gunpowder. He blinks at the bullet in his hand as you continue. “I know you don’t care about anything beyond your work, but if you hadn’t gotten me out of that cage they would have burned me alive. Skinned me.” Your tongue pokes out of the side of your mouth. “I don’t know, but it wouldn’t have been kind. Job or not…thank you for getting me out of there.” 
“I shot you,” he utters, voice gravel. Ghost seemed confused.
Your lips flick. “I never said I forgave you for that part.”
A smooth chuckle wafts out over the attic and your own softly mirrors. Your head tilts somewhat quizzically. “But, about that…did you mean to put so much wolfsbane on it?”
Ghost shakes his head, grumbling. A small sense of honesty leaks out. “...Expected you to be bigger.”
You blink, and then, a few seconds later, a loud snort echoes like a ringing bell. 
The Hunter's unimpressed look only leads you to find him all the more enjoyable. “Shut it. Fuckin’ hell.”
A hand is waved from your party, dismissing the harsh snap. “Sorry, sorry.” You puff out amused air. “Spector not up to your expectations?”
Ghost nearly rolls his eyes, trying to focus on the task at hand. He didn’t mind your company, at the very least he knew he needed to keep an eye on you for any potentially forced shifts or hostile attitude. What he hadn’t expected was to find you so…different from your muzzled counterpart, your shared physical inhabitant. 
He could almost call you endearing if he wasn’t so numb to the sight and scent of reality. 
“Sightings were far between,” Ghost grunts. “Here-say. I took an educated guess—better to put something like you out of commission than drag my way out of a forest without legs.”
“No apology?” You try, tilting your head.
“None,” is the drawn response. “I don’t have regrets. You’re alive.” 
Your fingers touch the outside of one of his journals, tracing the bumps and grooves of age and wear. You hum, but don’t reply. Most of your pains have been pushed back now, even if you still weren’t up to full strength. Food and rest helped, but the anxiety that perpetuated only lengthened the healing process. 
When you can’t trust even yourself under the drunkenness of the moon, it only makes your fear of the sun worse. Everything made you afraid—most of all your mind; most of all, the future. 
“Why do you want to find the werewolf that turned me?” You have to speak this, have to push. Your curiosity demands it.
Ghost puts the bullet down and grabs a rag from his belt, mask turning to look your way as he brushes off his hands. He pauses, looming with that gargantuan height—natural intimidation in the span of his chest and the trunk that makes up his front. You find yourself in his shadow as he rubs at his fingers with the rag, taking it away and slotting it back into his belt a moment later. 
The man’s heat leaks into your body as he blinks over, glancing your form up and down in a single look; keeping a respectful distance but still making his attentions known. 
He stares. “If it keeps biting people, there won’t be any villages left to take up contracts from.”
“Money?” You frown.
“Principle,” Ghost counters, chest rising and falling steadily. “There needs to be a middle ground. Too many feral werewolves, too few people. Cut off the head.”
“Ominous,” your form turns to his, itching at the back of your head again—the scabbing skin. “If what you said was true, how do you know the thing isn’t already dead? If it hasn’t tried to get to me, what was the point of making me?”
“Because you hadn’t left St. Francis’ by the time I put a bolt in you.” Ghost grumbles, rubbing a hand on his bicep, itching above the fabric of his tunic. He stretches with a grunt—and you see his shirt ride up and the pale skin underneath. You gawk for a moment at the length of scars and brutal muscle.
“Charming,” you dryly utter, stuttering in a brief second of pulling back your senses, but the Hunter continues on, ignoring you.
“That was where you were turned—your territory. You stayed because your leader is still close by waiting.” Legs shift, and all of a sudden, a body is over you, hands are on the base of your skull, pushing your own away as brown eyes dig into the injury you pick at. 
Your breath hitches, tensing for a second as your spine straightens. You watch widely from the corner of your eye as Ghost runs a careful hand over the flesh. He puffs a breath, chest moving in a grunt that is both commonplace and expected, yet the brush of his chest to your shoulder is not. 
You restrain a shiver, nostrils moving to the overwhelming swell of leather and gunpowder. Bone fragments; the tang of whiskey. 
His skin as he runs a thumb over the edge of your wound.
“It’ll start cracking.” Ghost utters, and through his fabric, you feel the brush of speech. “Have to apply more balm. Stop messing with it unless you want stitches soon.” 
It takes a moment more of his surgical study and a small clearing of your throat before you can speak. Your mind changes the subject for you.
“So…if my bite can’t turn anyone,” you breathe, nearly sagging as Ghost’s fingers catch in your hair, shifting it under his attention to get a better look. He listens, you know. He wasn’t good at talking, but he always listened. “Why did they muzzle me?”
For a brief instance, you think you feel the Hunter’s fingers jerk a tiny amount—some reactionary muscle twitch that leads your body to still. 
Ghost can’t say why he did that, though perhaps it was the sudden flash of the injuries that he’d wrapped on the road back to his property that went over his eyelids. Or the cage—your pleading face aching for whatever small sliver of brutish company you can get. 
The silver bullet that he still had in his pocket, attached to that leather cord. He knew the purpose; the intent. Just as he knew the scrape of scabbing under his fingertips. 
“Control,” he grumbles, and it’s all he’ll say. 
Your burning face is somewhat down-turned, letting him do as he must, study what he can. He hadn’t made any moves to endanger you, and besides the upcoming full moon, there was nothing here that screamed imminent danger. Danger as a general, yes, of course. You were a werewolf in a hunter’s home—it would always be…your eyes flutter when his fingertips drag over your scalp…it would always be danger….dangerous.
Ghost doesn’t think you notice it, but your eyes are drooping. 
He watches after the slight shock wears off, a tiny smirk flickering the hidden skin of his lips after he realizes the reason. If you had a tail, he’d assume it would be moving in a soft arch by now. 
The man was mildly amused at that, and before he moved away fully, he had to stop himself from uttering a sarcastic, ‘like that, then?’ 
He had to remind himself not to get attached to whatever…this was. He was using you as bait, as some key to his problem. Not a companion. The distance here had to be firm and heavy-handed. 
“The balm is down in my packs,” he grunts, leaving just as his name implied before you had the chance to gather your bearings and the lack of caressing heat. You startle back to the attic room, eyes wide and face loose before Ghost’s retreating footsteps echo on the stairs. “Don’t bloody use it all, then.”
The front door opens and closes with a pull of weighted wood.
“I can’t do this,” you mutter, pacing alone in the middle of the night down in the living room 
The full moon was tomorrow. 
“I can’t do it,” you itch at the back of your head, peeling at the nearly healed flesh harshly. Your nails dig into the soft tissue, drilling like a knife. A bead of blood slips around your fingers, but it doesn't stop you.
It’s late—late enough to know that Ghost should be asleep by now. For days, the paranoia, just like always, builds until you are nearly as mute as your Hunter. No more curiously searching his attic; no more questions about his job or how he got into this business. Brown eyes had been lingering more as the days went by, this strange companionship growing. You knew, in his own way, he was…worried.
So silent, even he had been getting noticeably uneasy. Shifting legs and quick glances. Nights where you hid under the bed from the moon until lunch came around, Ghost speaking as easily as he could to try and coax you out to no avail. You, a feral dog with white-rimmed eyes. 
At supper, only hours before this panicked pacing, you had told something to Ghost that made him double-take. 
“If I can’t stop it…I need you to shoot me. In the head.”
He’d never answered, but his eyes seemed to get ever-sharper as the hours continued on. More tense. Ansty.
But…that was his job, wasn’t it? 
“Can’t do it,” you murmur. Blood slips down your wrist. “It isn’t right—”
“Spector?” Ghost’s voice had become so familiar to you that the only thing that made your heart skyrocket was the sudden call of it. Your gasp is sharp from behind a panted breath, hand flinching away from the crater you were steadily digging in your skull. A long string of blood trails into the air as your fingers jerk away, and it’s only then that you notice the deep pangs of pain.
Your eyes shudder for a second as Ghost’s form makes it to ground level. He comes over slowly, attention staying on the way the moonlight makes the crimson stains glint from the dripping line seeping into the sleeve of your tunic. He blinks, and you both stand.
The man’s skeletal adornment was missing, though the fabric under remained. A loose sleep shirt and pants, stained by the rays of night. 
“Let me see,” he sighs under his breath, a tiny rasp telling of the sleep he’d been awoken from.
“I didn’t mean to wake you,” you utter. He doesn’t seem to care, grabbing your wrist and pulling the limb away as his body takes up presence behind you. 
“Was already awake,” Ghost grunts, eyes narrowing in hidden worry. You calm down a bit at that, one less problem to worry yourself about. 
The Hunter, quietly, leaves for a second and grabs his pouch near the door. With a muffled command, he nods to the bed until you’re backing up and hitting the back of your knees off of it, sitting. 
Ghost lights the candle on the nightstand and opens his belongings with stiff glances your way. He noticeably doesn’t ask why you’ve harmed yourself like this.
“I can’t,” you say it like a plea for help. “Ghost, I can’t do it again.” 
Hands fiddle with clean bandages and take out his waterskin. The man douses a rag with the liquid and comes over, shifting onto the bed and lightly turning you so your back is to him—legs half hanging off. 
The hard press of cold water makes your breath hitch, and you bite your lip.
“It hurts,” you push out. Ghost knows you’re not talking about the newly opened wound. 
“Breathe,” he says to you, seeing the way your sides expand with heavy lungs. Brown eyes flutter from the push of his large hand to the warmth of your shaking flesh. “Tell me about your home, yeah? Heard you lived in your own place.”
The question makes you double-take.
He’s asking me that? Here? Now? Hours away from perhaps another catastrophe?
Yet, you can’t help the slippage of your tongue as Ghost’s fingers rub into your scalp. The rag is lessened, and, soon, the material is rubbed gently over the sore itch of weeping skin. You fight a whimper and reply with an addled mind. 
“It…it’s quiet. Calm. I always keep the candles going because I don’t like the dark.” Ghost works quietly and quickly. 
“There,” he grunts, glancing at the flickering light of the candle he lit. He’d have to remember that. “And?”
“I kept sheep.”
He pauses, and, without meaning to, a soft scoff bounces off the confines of his chest. It catches your attention far better than a bullet could. Ghost shifts a needle and thread out of his gathering of items, taking away his limbs only for the short while it takes him to loop the two together. 
“How many?” The masked man asks, amusement gone just as quickly as it had come. 
“Only a handful,” you whisper. Your mouth opens and closes, glancing over your shoulder as the candle-light spills out over the room; casting shadows over Ghost’s face, catching on his long eyelashes. Those browns of his glint like tree trunks covered in dew.
“Please,” your words are muffled. Eyes wide and fearful, there isn’t anything that can console you on this. “You need to kill me.”
There was a dichotomy to you—a violent thing. You didn’t want to die, no, you feared it heavily, more than the moon, but the truth was that you couldn’t keep going through this. The unknowing. The breaking bones, the blinding pain. The understanding that nothing that you do can stop it. 
“It hurts, Ghost,” your breath stutters. “More than taking off a limb, more than slicing yourself open and ripping out your intestines—it burns more than the light of the moon.”
The Hunter listens through all of it. He sits, he stares, and he hides the brimming sense of concern behind his dead eyes.
With a pulling of his eyebrows, Ghost’s free hand moves upwards and grabs your chin. Freezing, you study this phenomenon from over your shoulder, face on fire with eyes wide to the pale skin visible to your view. You hadn’t realized until now, but this was the most you’d seen of the man’s face. 
You could make out the point of his crooked nose—the strength of his jaw under the form-fitting fabric. Cheekbones and the heaviness of his brows. Wisps of hair. He had eyes like a cat, you had to admit; something sly about them despite the numbness that seemed to extend bone-deep. 
But his hands had been kind to you. 
Firmly, Ghost’s fingers run your flesh, and he blinks softly before a low sound echoes in his throat. He pushes carefully on your jaw and shifts your head back forward so he can help you. When he lets go, your heart quivers in your breast
“I’m ‘ere,” he mutters, and you feel the first stitch enter the thin flesh of your head. You take down deep breaths, focusing on the scrape of his fingertips and not the point of the needle. Ghost can understand the fear of it—of pain. It’s instinct. He tilts his head and pushes out, “I can only ask for one full moon from you, yeah? No more. I just need one.” 
“And if I can’t find the werewolf?” Your voice vibrates with emotion, staring down at your hands as Ghost’s chest brushes your spine. The scent of him was addling your brain; the rub and slide of his hands.
The Hunter’s jaw clenches softly. “...Then I let you go.”
It wasn’t what you were expecting, but anything from the time you’d gotten a bolt through the thigh was unknown territory, and, like a dog without a leash, you’d run into it. Your brows furrow, blood oozing down your neck before Ghost’s grip shifts to place the rag back again, swiping away firmly. 
“Go?” He nods, but you can’t see it. “But what about the hunt?”
“I can manage.” The stitching pauses. The air is broken up nearly a full minute later. “You’re not evil.” Before they start up again as if nothing was uttered aloud. 
The confession makes the sting in the back of your eyes start up again—a strong thing of confusion and vulnerability. Ghost continues his task, pulling together your skin one suture at a time until the injury is fully closed; clean. 
“Chin,” he lowly states, and you allow him to tap your jaw, shifting it up so the wrappings can loop above your ear and over your forehead—securing them. 
Even far after the blood has seeped through, the two of you stay.
Come morning, you already feel wrong.
Your body stays in bed, shaking—sweating. A large pain flairs in your chest over and over like a pulsing well in the earth, skin twitching with the spread of blood. Ghost sits beside the bed all the while, having dragged over his chair. He leans back into it, one arm over the side, hanging with the thing ever so often moving to rub at the back of his neck. 
You don’t think he’s moved since he brought it over last night; since he got another candle to stick into the holder—push back the dark. To watch, to study, or just to stave off your rising anxiety is another question. 
It’s only after the fourth time you try to rip at the stitches at the base of your skull that he finally grabs your hand and holds it silently. Now, his thumb moves over your knuckles—his gloves back on. 
At noon, he tries to suggest eating.
“Hungry?” Ghost asks. 
“No,” you say instantly, sweat dripping over your temple, your body partially buried under blankets. “No, I’ll just throw it up.” 
Brown eyes glint. “Just one bite?” 
Your mouth is already salivating—thoughts of wet flesh and blood in the forefront until you whine and shove your face into the pillow; panting heavily. 
Whispers dance in the shell of your ears. 
I’m here.
I’m here.
I’m here.
“Go away,” you whisper quickly to them. 
Ghost pauses, hesitating. After a moment, his thighs tense with the action of movement, thinking you’re speaking to him. Something swirls in his chest, but he starts to stand nonetheless.
Your eyes widen.
“No!” Both of your hands latch onto the Hunter’s wrist, fear a needle stuck in your gaze. “No, not you. Stay, please.”
A silver cage covered in blood slides across Ghost’s slightly shocked look, but he only licks at the corner of his mouth and slowly leans back once more. 
“Not going anywhere,” he says, accent dipping. “Tell me what you’re hearing, yeah?”
His hand slips back into yours, and he presses into your pulse softly, counting. The sun continues across the sky.
“I don’t like how it sounds,” you say, shaking your head. “It’s wrong.”
“Focus,” Ghost breathes, looming closer. His grip squeezes once. “It can’t hurt you.” 
You shiver, eyes tightly closed as tears burn the back of your nose. “It’s howling.”
A suddenly gloveless hand spreads up your cheek, resting there and pushing back the sweat that pools. It’s calloused—scarred. You whine, head spinning.
I’m waiting. 
Find me.
Find me.
“I don’t want to,” you utter under your breath, words an amalgamation of slurring gasps. 
“Spector,” Ghost calls, head moving closer. “Eh.”
“I don’t want to hurt anyone,” your hurried panic is similar to a mind overdosing on wolfsbane. “Gotta go away—gotta get out—”
“Spec!” The Hunter’s quick bark makes your eyes pop open, and you lock instantly with brown orbs. 
They’re tight, unblinking just as always. They offer just a few moments of clarity. 
Ghost holds your head still while the rest of you shivers with cold sweats, you can hear the blood inside of his veins; his heart pumping. The scent of his skin was addicting to the point of memorization on the airwaves. You watch, gulping down breaths as your throat bobs. 
Eyes dart you up and down, fingers spreading out to offer what little comfort he can. The man wonders if he’s completely in over his head. 
Ghost pulls his face-covering up to his nose, and your heart skips beats at the sight of ravaged skin and stubble, scars spreading out like your own. Long ones, short ones, burn marks, and hyperpigmentation. He wasn’t pretty, but he was real. 
Oh, he was real. 
His grip on you strengthens until all you can focus on is him. 
Ghost blinks, and you see his lips move. The gravel of his voice was never more clear. “Fucking hell, keep that head on, okay? Nothing’s going to happen as long as I’m here. I’ve got you.” He sighs out a low breath, thumb running your undereye as the small dribbles of tears begin to sneak out. Ghost murmurs. “I’ve bloody got you, alright? Let it happen—we can figure it out.”
He’d grown fond of you over the course of a month. You were curious; not pushingly so. Honest. Good. You’d been dealt a bitter hand, and damn him if his stone heart wasn’t stretched thin at the raw fear on your face. This wasn’t your fault, but he needed to find who turned you and stop them before it got any more out of control than it already was. If more unstable werewolves went running through the woods, there wouldn’t be anyone left in the territory alive.
“When you turn,” Ghost says as clearly as he’s able. “Go. Don’t fight it. I’ll find you.”
“Promise?” You ask, a weak flicker coming to your lips—eyes vulnerable. 
Ghost nods once, and it’s all you need. “I’ll find you,” he repeats. “Doubt me?”
“No,” you ease, clearing your throat. “But…one more thing?”
“Anything,” the Hunter instantly says. 
“Just don’t shoot me in the thigh again.”
When the claws start protruding from your nailbeds hours later, you’re bolting to the door with only one last glance at the Hunter and his half-pulled-up mask. Booted feet hitting the wood as he stands, he lets you go even as his thighs tense in a need to run after you. Patience was his beast to tame, but it seemed to have left him in the form of a woman disappearing into the tree line. 
There is companionship in broken things.
Your body slips into the forest just as the creak of your bones begins to shift and bend. You fall into a heap, hearing the gargling of marrow under your skin like a call to sea. An urge grows to infect you; a feral need to run and hide. Biting back a shrill scream, a hoarse yell escapes instead—flesh rippling as your mouth opens, fangs breaking the supple mushiness of your gums as blood floods like a river. 
Find me. 
Find me.
Find me.
“Ghost,” you whisper, hands snapping to your head. “Ghost, please.” 
Your bullet, you want your silver bullet.
A rabid scream rips from your throat, and back in the house, Ghost’s hands tighten into fists as he glares at the open door. He growls under his breath, eyes tightening in a certain type of anger that brews in his gut. The nights your shuffling woke his light slumber were more common than when you hadn’t, and every utterance was clearly heard to his ears. It had become a curse to him—how you’d met.
A regret was seeping in, a care, and now, as he forces himself to back up and head into the attic, Ghost clenches his jaw tightly. So unaffected by the horror of monsters, he was now at a loss of sense for this growth of feelings. 
He wasn’t dull, he knew that some of the contracts he took marked him as a tool and not a person of stable mind. He’d done things he wasn’t proud of, and he would continue to do them for no other reason than they were the orders he was given.
But you had broken a piece of that off of him, somehow, someway, your face had seared itself into his retinas—speared him at the brutality that your community had treated you with. The muzzle. It was cruel, and while Ghost was precisely that, there was a limit. 
He did his job, and that was that. Anything after wasn’t his problem. 
You became his job, and the one who turned you was an add-on. Maybe if he justified it to himself, he could understand his actions better. 
But he was already sprinting to grab his gear when the first howl shattered the night.
A white beast prowls the forest. 
It stands on two legs, but it isn’t human—isn’t natural. It’s taller than a grown man is; snout pulled back in a soundless snarl that puts dogs to shame with rows of teeth so sharp, they look like pale knives. Its feet—large, splayed—soundlessly skate the ground until clawed fingers slam to the earth. 
A nose inhales the scent above the dirt, tongue lulling as a shaggy tail lays limp behind a curved spine. In between the erect ears, under the thick skull of the werewolf, the rolling bumps of a brain spark. A pull.
Find me.
Your eyes are tiny black dots—and they blink once before you rise once more. A great growl moves inside of your chest, the large collection of hair around your neck standing on end.
I’m waiting.
But there’s something that keeps you here—standing in the grass as the moon shines atop your head, your fur nearly glowing even with the stain of bloody injuries. The remains of clothes are about a meter away; only strips of what was. 
Your gaze looks over your shoulder, and your gargantuan frame lumbers backward until you can stoop to them—nose once more sniffing with your arms reaching.
Your fingers twitch, blackened claws digging through the ground as a near purr echoes in your throat. The scythe-like additions card across the strips.
Gunpowder. 
Leather.
Whiskey.
Something you can’t quite name, but feel drawn to despite the tightening noose at your throat. There was something there you can’t focus on…something that you need. 
Your drooling jaws snap, saliva coating the fangs until they drip off one at a time to stain the grass. Body shifting, your head lowers until your wolf-ish visage rubs against the fabric, licking at the sides of your gums as delicate grumbles slip out of your mouth. 
A far-off howl leaves your frame freezing.
Eyes slipping back into the feral-inhumanity of a wild animal, your body jolts up, gaze to the forest trees and the rustling of bushes. The swell of rain on the clouds is in the back of your nose, and the previous attraction to the ripped clothes is lost as simply as it had come. 
You were being summoned. 
Ears twitching, the entirety of your body refuses to move to the sound; tensed and ready to spring on anything that moves if only to let off the spike of anger at the lack of control. The pull grows stronger, and it feels like something is trying to drag you away into the wilds.
This was the sensation you were always trying to fight—the one that led to the aggression; the hunt. You knew that if you followed that howl, whatever was left of your human sense would be gone entirely before you could stop it. 
Yet, this time, there’s a nagging need to find the owner, and you can’t remember why.
Your large head tilts, feet spaced as the curve of your spine grows more aggressive—hunching forward as you snarl at nothing, claws shaking as your fur is more bristly than sleek. 
Like pure white spikes. 
In the back of your head, a thin sliver of a memory slips in. Fingers on the back of your head, caressing calluses and dark, dark, eyes. Clean bandages and gentle touches.
I’ll find you.
If the side of your vision picked up the shadow shifting from far off into the trees, your curled lip never turned that way. If your nose twitched to the heavy weight of a man’s sweat, it never shifted to point as a mutt would to the rustling bush.
Your body bolts after the resounding echo of a wolf’s howl, and it’s no later that Ghost slips after your clawed prints to follow.
Crossbow in hand, the hunter’s mask gleams in the darkness, his pale eyes twinkling. Bending down, he glazes at the long pushing tracks of your form—seeing the spray of dirt to the side and the broken branches. Ghost blinks, shoulders tense before he swiftly stands and continues on. The firearms at his thighs lightly rattle, and the bolts in his crossbow are already laced with wolfsbane; silver tips smelt a week ago. 
He passes a river with only a single glance at the tossed rocks from the bed, sloshing through the water as the bottoms of his pants get weighed down. Ghost’s mind is on one thing only: make sure this plan won’t get you killed. 
The bolts aren’t for you—the silver bullets aren’t for you. 
He grunts under his breath, the dark woods casting phantoms over the ground. The Hunter’s legs shift through tall grass, and he carries himself with the ingrained confidence a man of his station requires. If he were anything less than a monster himself, he would have died ages ago. Ghost shoots and lets others come up with the questions, but he could never be called dumb. 
Seeing what fast glimpse he had of your shifted form after the last time, he was struck by how erratic it acted. Snapping head, twitching ears, and roving eyes. If he didn’t know any better, Ghost would have called it rabid. 
Yet, your actions with his borrowed shirt were…body-stilling, to say the least about it. It had made his gut swirl.
“Give me a trail,” Ghost utters to himself, brown eyes still picking up the dash you’d taken. His agile feet splash through a puddle, the beginnings of raindrops hitting his head. 
The man grabs at his hood and pulls it up stiffly, frowning under his mask.
Rain would wash away the tracks.
“C’mon, Love,” he grinds out, body hunched. “Leavin’ me to do the dirty work, eh?” 
It’s too quiet—even a collection of minutes later of hard hiking, the trees barely move. There aren’t any birds; no animals beyond the black bodies of crows in the far-up branches, waiting, watching with obsidian eyes that don’t blink. 
Ghost isn’t off-put, but the length of his strides gets far tinier, carefully stepping over twigs and rocks like a soldier at war. Then again, he was at war. And if he was caught unawares, there wouldn’t be a bullet to pull out of his side, but, instead, a chunk missing. 
His ears were almost ringing from how hard he was focusing. 
Brown eyes shift from one area to another, and then, suddenly as if a deer, he freezes. 
Ghost’s body winds up, fingers twitching from the stark trigger discipline of his crossbow downward instantaneously. No one but him can explain what just happened, but he knows when he has to listen instead of act. Stuck in a clearing not unlike the place he’s first met you, his feet rest shoulder width apart and his eyes stare blankly into the trees ahead.
Your tracks end here.
From behind him, just as the large raindrops slap the side of his bone-ed visage, the small crack of a twig makes his ears twitch.
A low snarl sets his hair on end. 
Looking over his shoulder, Ghost is met with the same color that he’d become so accustomed to in a full month completely blacked out. Void. Lifeless to anything besides rage and bloodlust. 
Your white fur was infected with dirt, blood, and leaves—a mosaic of ferality ingrained into your body; pale fangs snapping. The beast slips through the treeline, slapping a veined hand into the soggy earth. 
Ghost only watches, eyes a mystery. 
His finger shifts over the trigger, and for the first time in his life, he hesitates. 
The man looks into your glinting orbs, the dripping saliva on your lulling tongue as your esophagus pants for breath. One hesitation, he always knew, would mean death. One mess-up. 
You’d asked him to end it, he shouldn’t feel remorse, guilt, perhaps—he was still human, despite his appearance, but remorse was deeper. It left wounds that were harder to lick clean again. 
…So why isn’t he sending a bolt into your forehead?
Ghost remembers the times he’d found you under the bed, your shaking, and the way you hadn’t allowed him to change your bandages the first few weeks you’d stayed with him; didn’t want him to touch you. The nightmares and the small smile you’d gain when he’d spew his dark, sarcastic words as if this was a joke. How you’d always thank him under your breath for the food he’d give you, hunted by his own hand. 
A silver cage. Crimson blood. The sight of your pleading eyes when you’d told him to shoot you.
Maybe the two of you were far more alike than he’d dare to admit. And he currently won’t, not even on his deathbed. Not even now.
Ghost watches, and he waits. 
He can’t do it.
Your body slinks closer, stalking with the sound of anger, nearly rib-shaking in its volume. Ghost’s jaw clenches, and his body shifts to face yours head-on. At the sight of the crossbow, your snarl turns into an air-biting rage, saliva flying through the rain.
“Spector,” he keeps his voice low, even. The sight he’d seen as you smelled his clothes had to mean something. Ghost tilts his head, moving out a hand from the side of his weapon in an appeasement gesture. “I’m not going to shoot you. We have a job to complete…get those fangs away.”
He wonders if ordering you around will even work. You had told him before—you’re not a mutt. Ghost agrees. No mutt was the size of a fucking boulder.
The werewolf’s claws drag—goring the mud as if a pig to tear apart. 
“Spector,” the Hunter tries again. But something’s different about his tone; he drops it, letting it pull on a softer string. “I’m here to end this. We’re here to end this.” He blinks and lowers the crossbow completely. “Breathe. The night can’t last forever.” A breeze whips the trees. “I made you a promise.”
There’s a second, he thinks, where he can see something shift in your gaze, pupils slightly widening above the deluge that wets down your fur into a sopping mess that hangs off muscle.
“That’s a girl,” Ghost grunts, taking a small step closer. “Never told you,” he utters, eyes locked with yours. He sees your nose twitch minutely. “But if we get this right, Spec, there’ll be no more painful shifts, hear me?”
Your dog-ish mouth is closed, hanging off every word as Ghost comes even closer.
“I kill this bastard,” the hunter breathes, gloved hand still outstretched, nearing closer to the near-silver of your form. “The moon’ll have no claim on you. She’ll let you off the leash, Little Wolf. You get to decide when it happens.” 
He thinks he has you now, back to some state of recognition in the addled brain that tries to see him as prey; as competition. Ghost’s fingers are close enough to almost touch you, but just before he can brush his gloves over your wet fur, your mouth opens in a display of untamed challenge. Your growl is enough to make the man unconsciously reach for his pistol, and in the time it takes him to realize the fault of it, you’ve already rampaged forward with an unhinged jaw.
Ghost’s eyes widen, taking a quick step back. 
Your legs push off, and you shove the hunter out of the way just before the fangs of an immense beast can clamp down on him, your own finding the shoulder of gray, thick fur.
Fighting as wolves do, Ghost only needs a moment to recover and get to his feet, though the sight in front of him can rival any that he’d seen before. His crossbow clatters a few feet away, sending the bolt off into the trees with a metallic ‘twang’.
The two werewolves roll around the pouring clearing, snapping teeth and rending claws drawing blood that’s deep enough to swim in to the green grass. White and gray meld together—blue eyes like a knife to Ghost’s chest when he takes it in from between the sound of tearing fur. 
“Bloody fucking…” the man trails, staggering as his palms slap to the pistols at his side. He blinks, shouting in more of a bark than even a dog could imitate. “Spector!” 
The wolves pull and rip the other to shreds, flesh torn and limbs grasping for purchase. Bodies are slammed to the ground before getting tossed to the side, fangs flashing in the moonlight. Ghost watches crimson stain your fur a pinkish-red.
He can’t get a good shot.
The werewolf that turned you sinks its claws into your sides, dragging them downwards as you yowl, eyes tiny with aggression before your jaws connect with its snout, biting down with more force than a horse’s hooves. The monster screams—a garbed thing of fangs and saliva. 
Just as easily as it called you here to it, as it stalked your Hunter, it bashes your body back into the earth and takes you by the scruff of your neck. Eyes wide in that lupine way, you lock on Ghost’s profile before your body is lifted, and tossed away violently. 
Spine slamming into a tree, you hear the cracking and bending of your bones in your ears just after you hear the sharp shout from the man in the clearing, body dropping to a heap into the grass and mud. Angled head flopping back and forth, black infests the edges of your vision, coughing up blood that seeps from between your gums and slips down the back of your esophagus. Fur and flesh are stuck at the base of your throat. 
Whining, your limbs drag and pull futility, eyes flooded over with crimson and fogged by rain. A great roar worries the air, sending long shivers over your spine as you try to rise to your limbs, a five-fingered hand slamming you back down. 
Just before the fangs can clamp your throat, two great booms burst through the forest. 
The wolf atop you reels back, great bellow escaping its throat when you can finally drag your head to look over. This beast was clawing at its chest, shaking its large head in an arch to try and dispel the shock of having two silver bullets entering its back—the gray head snapped around to Ghost, who held his twin pistols aloft with eyes burning with anger from behind his mask. An avatar of vengeance; a bringer of death. 
The orbs inside of your sockets widened, nose twitching wildly as you bleat a quick warning bark. 
Blue-Eyes rises, body far larger than yours would ever grow to be—on two feet more powerful looking than a bricklayer many years into his craft; tall enough to reach to the sides of black-shingled homes and pull itself up. Ghost takes one look and growls under his breath, knowing there would be no time to reload the weapons in his hands. 
So he drops them and pulls slowly at the cruel blade in his belt until the gleam winks in the low light like a curved smile. Setting it in his hands, the small flicker of a sharp smirk on his lips is lost to you. 
Yet, there isn’t a chance for some brawl between two beasts—there’s only the flash of pale fur and the final crunch of a body hitting the ground. 
You bury your fangs into the wolf’s neck; the one responsible for all of your pain and torment spanning years of isolation. You feel the body seize as it drops, the last remnants of a dying brain trying to fight the inevitable nothingness that ensues, and, you only hold on the harder, the bloodlust seeping back in with every drop of life pooling into your locked jaw.
Your throat releases tiny growls of pleasure, biting a bit to make sure there wasn’t a sliver of a chance that something living was walking away from this scene. 
Ghost pauses, and in the back of his head, he knows he should stop you. Brown eyes see the animalistic sheen of enjoyment at a fresh kill, the way you pull at the flesh until chucks peel away from a gurgling wolf. Even when the thing is long dead and the rain still slaps the earth, you barely let go until you get a hold of the meat and tear with a backward jerk of your snout.
“Love,” the Hunter sheathes his knife, taking a step forward. The blood was pooling under your body. How many of those were treatable? He had to know. “Let me see what’s—”
The eyes that lock on him are not yours. 
Up to your ears, the entirety of your face was awash with the stain of life, dripping off the whiskers at your cheeks; your chin. 
Before he can utter another word, he finds himself on his back with a snapping snout right in front of his face, two dead eyes staring deeply into his own. Ghost sucks down a quick breath, hand snapping to the large wrist shoving down on his chest.
He pants out, gravel accent far more deep than it was before. 
“Easy, Spector. Easy. Eh—focus on me.” Your tongue licks at your fangs, body shaking. Ghost pushes out, “That’s it, then. It’s over, yeah? You did it; let's pack it up and head back home.” He grunts. “Recon even dogs get cold in weather like this—the bed’s waiting. Get a nice fire going.”
Ghost sees your face move closer, and his hand minutely shifts to the vial of wolfsbane on his belt. It wouldn’t kill you, but it could put you out of commission until your body shifted back into its proper form. He could carry you back—that wouldn’t be a problem at all. 
But he was worried about your injuries. Even now the droplets of blood roll off of you faster than the water can. 
Too much.
Brown eyes crease, darting a look down. 
“Fuck,” he growls, seeing the carnage and the open meat. “Sweetheart, we need to get you checked out—you need to listen to me. Can you do that?”
He can see the conflict; the internal fight. 
Your mouth moves with fast pants, claws stuttering over his gear futilely. You blink rapidly, shaking your large head in fast increments with small snarls. 
“C’mon,” Ghost says slowly, fingers looping the vial. “Keep listening. Know my voice is utter shite, but only you can tell me it.” 
Your head drops to his chest just as the wolfsbane is popped open, and, for whatever reason, Ghost pauses. He waits. 
You take a long inhale of his gear—of the leather and the gunpowder, and just before the Hunter can dump the vial over your skin, the long blackish claw on your finger loops the bottom portion of the fabric under his bone attachment. 
The man’s breath hitches as you let it rest along his nose bridge…holding it there as you drag your head upwards as if it were an impossible chore. Your mouth dribbles out gore to his cheeks, but the Hunter stares upwards into your eyes as they soften in a lupine way. 
Inexplicably, you let out a bone-rattling sigh and slump into oblivion. 
Come morning, you sleep under the spread of large fur blankets—clean bandages over your bare frame as the man has tended to you for hours. He mutters for you to slip your arms into a spare shirt after he finds your eyes open, not uncomfortable by your nakedness, though he wants you yourself to be at ease. 
His brown eyes are creased, and you can’t remember what you’ve done. 
You comply with small grunts and moans; more sore and cut up than you can recall ever feeling as a large tunic is slipped over your head by scarred hands. 
Gunpowder. 
“What did I—?”
“You finished the job,” he says, sparing you a glance as he shifts back with his eyes averting themselves from your visible legs. The sun seeps in through the windows. “It’s morning.”
You blink slowly, and the man eases you back down into the furs. 
“I’m tired,” your voice yawns out—weak and brittle like the hope you’d had that this plan of his would work. Eyes half-closed, they blink at the hunter with a soft kind of care that you can’t remember showing before. Whatever pain medicine he’d given you, it was working. The underlying itch was still as strong as ever, though. 
“Tired is good,” Ghost nods slowly, standing still until he crosses his arms and sets his feet. He’s in a fresh shirt and pants. There’s blood under his fingernails; traces smeared over his flesh. “Means you accomplished something.”
“Don’t think that’s entirely true,” you breathe. A pause. “...Why is your mask like that?”
It was half pulled up—showing off his lower jaw and the stubble. The scars that you already have memorized. Ghost shrugs, blinking those dead eyes of his. 
“Ah,” he grumbles. “Forgot. Here.”
He reaches up and slips the thing off in one motion. Your loose brain takes a moment to realize the entire face you’re staring into, but the second it does, the image is engraved into your mind forever. You make a noise in the back of your throat. 
“Better, Little Wolf?” 
“W—” Your lips stutter, new sutures pulling tight. “Why would you…?”
“Hungry?” Ghost asks, quickly changing the subject. “Know you like that venison that I caught.”
“No,” you breathe. “No, I’m not…I’m tired, Ghost. My head hurts.”
A hand sweeps over your forehead, staying as you sag into it with a hum and a fluttering of your eyes. 
“Bloodloss,” the Hunter murmurs. “Normal. Go back to sleep; take however long you need. I’ll be here.” 
The bond between the two of you has strengthened to that of a silver rope.
“Stay,” you plead under your breath, already slipping back into nothingness with no promise to wake up again soon. “Hold me, Ghost?”
“Simon,” he grunts to only himself, knowing that the words are lost to you. Perhaps that makes him all the more eager to share it with you when you’re better. “Stay still.”
It wasn’t like you could protest.
The broad man slips in, shifting the furs until you’re covered back up and your forehead is to his chest—keeping himself closest to the door where the runes still sit in their bloody glory. If he listened hard enough, he could even hear them humming him a tune.
No song was better to him than the one of your breath at this very moment. Alive. Moving. There were many times in the night that he thought...hm.
“Better, then?” The dry tease slips out. 
A kiss to the side of his mouth is what he gets in answer, and he doesn't say a peep more until he knows you’re back in the clutches of a dream—a good one, he knows, because he watches your expressions like a loyal guard dog would.
Ghost, Simon, rests his lips on the top of your head, and in a delicate murmur, eases, “You did good, Love.” 
There was much to do, but for now, all he had to do was hold you a little bit tighter and let his stone heart beat a little bit faster.
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maythearo · 1 year
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" Welcome back to Night Raven College's 'Ghostly Gossip'! The school's unofficial main online source for the latest news, articles and trending topics circulating around campus! "
" Your eyes don't deceive you. He really is real. And an actual monster too, not just a 'weird looking dog', as those funny human legends say... "
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Navigation:
R. Rosehearts - T. Clover - C. Diamond - A. Trappola - D. Spade - L. Kingscholar - R. Bucchi - J. Howl - A. Ashengrotto - J. Leech - F. Leech - K. Al Asim - J. Viper - V. Schoenheit - R. Hunt - E. Felmier - I. Shroud - O. Shroud - M. Draconia - L. Vanrouge - S. Zigvolt - Silver
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I have mixed feelings over his design. On one hand, the outfit itself looks cool... and on the other hand it turned out to be nothing like what I had envisioned in the beggining 😭 I wanted to stick with muted colors, in the vibes of that pic next to howleen's I guess, but it's like Ruggie's design had a mind of its own, and would always lean to more punk-looking no matter how hard I tried to avoid it, which don't get me wrong- punk style does fit him well, the problem is that I had it reserved for another character already, and I wanted to repeat themes as little as possible between entries of this project.. that just may be my perfectionist side speaking though, and there is no reason why I shouldn't post this version here for the time being! If I don't get tired of working on this series by the time I finish all the main cast's designs, then I suppose I could try to make an alternative version of Ruggie with a slightly different theme! I'd do the same with Jamil's entry since he is yet another character I have mixed feelings about the design lol
Aaaanyway, the mood for chupacabra Ruggie is grunge/thrifted fashion with diy details he would add to make his looks feel unique to him I think? The spikes on his skin, although he can partially control (?) them, still get stuck on cloth every now and then. Nearly all items of his closet are a bit torn from it, but he doesn't mind all that much. I got no particular designs for the pins and badges he wears, maybe except for the brazilian flag and the trans pin which I rlly wanted to include somewhere on his clothes whsdbdshewbdi
The chupacabra's appearance vary from place to place, but for this, I based his looks on how I personally grew up hearing and imagining this creature to be like! Baisically a fucked up looking dog, sometimes with spikes and scales on its body? Yeah 👍
And he remains the same personality-wise in the AU, pretty much! At the moment I can't think of many fun facts or character quirks for him, aside from how impossible it is to take a selfie with him, much to Cater's dismay. He swears he doesn't do it on purpose! The moment the camera clicks his body moves on its own to be out of frame. Ruggie's entire instagram (or whatever the monster high equivalent of that may be) account are either pictures of a moving blur or a vaguely distinguishable sillouette of him, taken from far away and zoomed in 10x
I think that's all I remembered to say? Here's a Ruggie core meme I found on reels as extra content lol
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nadiajustbe · 3 months
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Sophie's denial is literally the best part of the book because in 300+ pages she:
a) Managed to convince herself that the smile Howl was using was a special smile that he used specifically to attract women. And that's the only reason she "fell" for it.
b) Listed absolutely everyone around, from people to dogs, as the reason for her recent anger, but didn't mention the real reason, which she knew perfectly well was Howl visiting ms. Angorian.
c) Describied Howl's beauty in one line with insults in his direction, and thought it was completely normal.
d) Sewed a suit for him and accidentally enchanted it to attract women, them began to explain any positive feelings towards him with this.
e) Was ready to literally destroy the garden when it turned out that the suit was not the case and so couldn't blame her emotions on one from now on.
f) Created a murderous weed killer among her jealousy and specific dislike for lilies. Still couldn't explain it to herself.
g) Almost killed that one crazy daredevil who decided to come and tell her that she's actually down for him pretty bad with it.
h) Went so far into her denial that the thought that the person she was in love with did not love her was a relief for her because it meant that nothing would change and she could continue to be in it.
i) Almost killed the above-mentioned person with the above-mentioned weed killer because she did not want to face her own feelings And because she chose murder.
j) Pushed a person out the door out of sheer jealousy. Still didn't do what she was expected to do, though.
k) When her own crush on Howl finally started to dawn on her, she decided to go save the person she thought he was in love with. He very obviously wasn't.
l) And, in the end, continued to think so even when Howl came to save HER in an absolutely terrible state, almost afraid of the thought that his appearance was a sign of true love.
What a woman.
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venus-haze · 1 year
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Dawn Patrol (Homelander x Reader)
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Summary: You never thought you’d see him again. Your soulmate, your other half, your partner in crime-fighting, the man you were going to spend the rest of your life with. It seems like the universe is giving you a second chance when you end up in this place with Homelander. Except, this one isn't quite like the man you remember, but he's not letting that stop him.
Note: Gender-neutral reader, and no descriptors are used. This is based on an anonymous request and also a different take on the “love of your life died and came back but something's wrong” horror trope. Title comes from the Megadeth song (which is about living in a dystopia). Do not interact if you’re under 18 or post thinspo/ED content.
Word count: 3.3k
Warnings: Extremely unhealthy relationship. Intense feelings of loss, confusion, and self-doubt on the reader’s part. Some elements of unreality? Homelander is extremely manipulative, possessive, and gaslights the hell out of the reader in this, but no physical harm is done. Do not interact if you’re under 18.
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The man standing in front of you wasn’t John, not your John, at least. He acted strange whenever you called him that. Homelander felt so impersonal, though, a title and persona rather than the man you loved your whole life. You silently scolded yourself. You shouldn’t complain so much, not when he believed you, against all reason, despite never having met you before in this version of reality. If it were even real. 
You had crumbled the first time you saw him. Weeks of being locked in a lab, poked and prodded and tested before he entered with an unfamiliar coldness. It had to have been a cruel trick, these people using your greatest vulnerability against you. John had been presumed dead for years. The ache that consumed you at his loss made it hard to even breathe sometimes, and you’d spent countless nights alone in your formerly shared bed, wracked by guilt for not doing more as you silently implored the universe to give you one more chance. You should have known it’d come with plenty of strings attached.
His name echoed through the room in a desperate howl. You strained against the titanium cuff you were chained to, and he froze upon hearing one of the links break. Rabid, desperate, tears streamed down your face in your delirium. You needed to touch him, to feel for yourself that it wasn’t your brain tricking you again. It has to be real this time.
His breath hitched as he approached you, the way animal control does a feral dog–cautious and gentle, but still regarding you with a level of distrust. Your struggle subsided with each step he took, until he was finally in arms’ reach. Looking into his blue eyes for the first time in years, your hand trembled as you lifted it to caress his cheek. Soft and warm like you’d remembered. 
“Who are you?” he asked.
“I’m your–Gemini,” you said. “‘Cause I can–”
“Make duplicates of yourself, they told me. Who are you?”
“Not here, but somewhere else, I'm your partner in, well, everything. We grew up across the street from each other,” you told him. “Your powers showed up sooner than mine, but your mom always said we were a package deal, so when we started fighting crime together, it just made sense that we’d fall in love too.”
“My mom?” he whispered.
“She was the one who came up with the name Gemini for me.”
His gaze softened, his eyes turning cloudy. You recognized that look. Deep in thought, a million miles away, the only place John wouldn’t take you. This one didn’t seem eager to do so either. Did he and his mom not get along here? Was she dead, even? 
He cleared his throat. “Go on.”
“We called ourselves Dawn Patrol because we’d get up before school to do our superhero stuff, and it stuck.”
“How did you end up here, then?”
“I already told them–”
“I want to hear it from you.”
You recoiled a bit. Your story began at the end, and while you managed to tell it to a group of seemingly indifferent white coats, recounting it to the man himself, or some version of him, was almost too much to bear. Still, you pushed through.
Phantom, that’s what he called himself, selfish and conniving with the ability to teleport in the shadows and seemingly shift reality itself. He was a particular menace that you and Homelander could never quite get the upper hand on, the situation imploding when Homelander, your Homelander, tackled the supervillain mid-teleport. The last thing you saw of him was his back as he disappeared with Phantom. 
No one had seen him since. Despite Phantom’s insistence that he didn’t know what happened to Homelander, you kept an irrational, unrelenting grudge against him for taking the love of your life away from you. Guilt and rage fueled you, and in your most recent, and presumably last encounter with your arch-nemesis, you made the same mistake Homelander did, and ended up wherever the hell you were.
“Either you’re telling the truth, or you’re an unprecedented liar,” he hissed through his teeth, grabbing your wrists, “but I believe you.”
A beastial imitation of your first and only love transformed before your eyes over the following weeks. In his absence, your yearning had grown teeth, long and sharp, hungry to tear through flesh and for your flesh to be torn. This new man’s rib cage cracked open to offer part of himself to recreate you. You looked into the crimson void and saw his beating heart, a long-suffering shrine to you as yours was to his, or at least some memory of him. A loneliness you were all too familiar with was already settled deep within him. Why needlessly suffer though a monastic existence any longer?
You, in turn, indulged in him. Allowed your hunger to overtake you and break your involuntary fast as you devoured him. Insatiable, your lips pressed against the skin of this stranger that nevertheless you knew by heart. In your grief, in your anger, you’d pulled him out from the ether. You wondered if you could put him back together as the man you knew he could be, bloody your hands raw clawing back the damage that had been done to him by whoever came before you. 
The first few days, you tried as much, the two of you hardly letting up from your entanglement in his bed. You stared at the mirror on the ceiling, taking him in with the attentiveness of the crowds that gathered around the tragically small Mona Lisa in the Louvre. Then, in the quiet moments, in tones hardly above hushed whispered, he’d ask you questions about this other life and upbringing he never got to experience, pensive at your answers, almost bothered at times. 
Most of his questions seemed to be about his parents, especially his mother. Though your phone had been returned to you, it had no signal, but you were able to show him photos. Some of the last ones of you and John together was at a Fourth of July party in his parents’ backyard. One of his aunts had taken a candid photo of you, John and his parents sitting together at one of the patio tables, smiling and laughing. You had everything documented, from weddings to birthday parties to school days. John always poked fun at you for taking the phrase “take a picture, it’ll last longer” so seriously. 
Now, reflecting on these times with his other, you clung to him as you watched him swipe through this other version of himself’s life. Studying it, silently reflecting on your stories and anecdotes as if to memorize them, be able to recite them by heart.
Despite the distorted period of reunited bliss, you could tell something was off about Homelander. He talked his way around your questions about his own upbringing, never quite giving you a straight answer and occasionally snapping at you when you pressed for more details. Your eyes widened the first time he did so, heart skipping a beat or two, you couldn’t recall John raising his voice at you like that before. Homelander noticed your reaction right away, soothing you with reassurances that he wasn’t mad at you, he could never be.
It seemed like he was mad at a lot of other people, though. He’d go on long rants about people at Vought, this corporation that didn’t exist where you were from but somehow controlled so much of his life and that of every other superhero. Walking around the tower with him, you noticed the way people’s demeanors shifted when he was there, a nervous submission he seemed to bask in but made your stomach feel sour. 
His attempts not to scare you, to put you at ease with the prospect of spending the rest of your life with him were never quite as successful as he hoped. The warning voice in your brain knew something was off about him. You ignored it as best you could, figuring you could manage a way to handle him and chalking it up to the loneliness he was entrenched in before you came along. One night, a rarity wherein you were alone in his suite and finally had a chance to think the situation through, you panicked, hatching a messy escape plan.
Leaving a duplicate of yourself behind in the living room, you slipped out of the suite, walking down the long hallway to the elevator. The tower was so tall that it required switching elevators to get from the top floor to the lobby, and so you made the initial descent to the 50th floor.
The ride down was excruciatingly long, and every time the elevator stopped to let someone in, you felt yourself freeze up. No one acknowledged you at any point during the descent, filtering in and out, minding their own business. 
When you switched elevators, you knew you were in the home stretch. Your heart raced as you pressed the ‘L’ for the lobby, the star next to the button assuring you that the ground floor would be your ticket out of there. By the time you were on the single-digit floors, you were alone again.
At least, you were until you reached the lobby. The doors opened, revealing Homelander waiting for you behind them. You backed into the wall on the opposite side of the steel box, as if that’d do anything to protect you.
His smile didn’t reach his eyes. “And where do you think you’re going?”
He entered the elevator, reaching over to press the button back up to the 50th floor. Silence for nearly twenty floors, though you were sure the sound of your rapidly beating heart was deafening to him.
Finally, you spoke. “How did you know?”
“Your duplicate’s pretty convincing, but they don’t have a heartbeat,” he said. 
John had never told you that. Your duplicates were perfect copies of you, your abnormal physical strength sapped to create each one so that they could take damage from attacks in your place. It never occurred to you that they were so blatantly lifeless.
The doors opened on the 50th floor, and instead of going in the next one over to continue the ascent, Homelander pulled you into an empty office. He closed the door, darkness engulfing the room. When you reached for a light switch, he caught your wrist in his hand instead.
“If you have a problem, you talk to me about it. You do not try to fake me out and run,” he hissed. “Do you really think the fucking white coats I saved you from would just let you walk out of here? You’d end up right back in that room. All of those things that he had, the loving parents, the pretty suburban life with your childhood sweetheart that's straight out of a fucking romcom? I didn't get that because of them."
"I'm sorry," you whispered. "You didn't deserve that."
"No," he said, almost shocked at your acknowledgement of how horrific his upbringing was. "I didn't. You're here, now, though, so we're both getting what we want."
Not like this. Not you.
Yet, you were stuck with the hand you had been dealt. This corrupted imitation of the man you loved, who nevertheless was so desperate for the intense emotions you felt for him otherwise that he was willing to believe you despite all logic telling him otherwise. 
The way he spoke about the people back in the lab you’d been held in, as if he knew, experienced what you did and even worse. Saved you from it. Maybe you could try. Maybe that could get you somewhere.
You wrapped your arms around him, burying your face in his chest. Being around him rendered you emotionally vulnerable. He looked just like him, and at times acted almost exactly the same. If you closed your eyes long enough, you could convince yourself it was him. How long could you go on doing that before you walked around blindly?
“Babe, did you hear a word I just said?” Homelander asked.
You looked up at him. “Got distracted, sorry.”
He rolled his eyes, the slightest smile on his face. “I’ll chalk it up to my good looks. I know you’ve been cooped up for a while, so I want you to do a team-up with me tomorrow night. It’ll be Dawn Patrol, just like old times.”
Old times? There were no old times. Not with him. 
Nevertheless, you agreed. “Yeah, it’d be nice to get back out there. Haven’t done it in a while.”
“Once you’re back at it, you won’t even have to think about it, like riding a bike,” he paused for a moment, “I guess.”
His excitement the following day was infectious. You hadn’t done any crime-fighting in a long time, and doing so with him would surely help you ease into it again. He was always the best of the best, but it seemed like here, not only was he deified, but he reveled in it.
When he brought you to his superhero team’s private gym to train, he was almost shocked at how well your powers and fighting style seemed to compliment him. Elation filled your chest. Maybe you’d jumped to conclusions too soon about him. You just had to be more flexible, willing to compromise to make it work. 
You were thrown off upon being presented with a crime-fighting schedule that night. A self-professed crime analytics team explained their methodology to you. When you looked to Homelander in disbelief, he seemed unfazed by the information. Being able to predict crime down to the minute just to bolster careers and social media followings seemed far from ethical, but from what little you’d learned of Vought in the weeks you’d been there, that wasn’t a concern of theirs.
Flying with him again was almost too overwhelming, bringing back memories of you and John in your teenage years. Instead of partying with your peers, the two of you would pick up fast food late on Saturday nights, sitting on suburban rooftops with your police scanner, eating burgers and listening for trouble. He’d grab you by the waist, flying off with you to stop some bad guys. Of course, people complained to your parents that you’d leave chicken nugget boxes and ketchup packets on their roofs in your haste. 
By the time Homelander landed in an alley just a block away from where the crime would supposedly take place, you were crying. 
“You okay? I thought you’d be used to it.”
“I am. It’s just been a while. Brought back a lot of memories.”
He smiled, kissing your forehead. “You won’t have to go so long without flying with me again. I promise, babe.”
You sniffled, giving him a weak smile. “Let’s go get some bad guys.”
“That’s the spirit!”
The next few minutes were silent as Homelander listened for the sound of a bank alarm. Late-night robbery, the crime analytics team had told you, it couldn’t be easier. You weren’t sure what time it was when Homelander grabbed you, the familiar gesture of his arm around your waist making you feel overwhelmed again. 
When he landed, you could see the glass doors leading into the bank had been smashed, leaving shards of glass scattered on the sidewalk that crunched beneath your boots. There’d be three bank robbers, one lookout while the other two took what they could from the vault. You and Homelander already agreed that you’d take on the lookout and then join him in subduing the others.
You hesitated for a moment when you and Homelander split up, but you didn’t let it distract you too much. The lookout froze upon seeing you duplicate, his hand shaking as he pointed the gun between you and your temporary clone. Whichever one he shot, you’d heal fast enough, though you’d get less damage if he shot the duplicate rather than you.
His impulsiveness proved to be his downfall, as your duplicate began to walk toward him, and he pulled the trigger, nearly passing out when the clone de-materialized before him. 
In his moment of distraction, you knocked the gun from his hand, grabbing a nearby desk phone and hitting him in the temple with it. You kicked the gun to the other side of the room before he could reach for it and hit him in the head again. He dropped to the ground, unmoving on the floor.
You set off to find Homelander. The vault was empty when you got there, a mess of valuable and still smoldering scorch marks in the wall where either the thieves had used explosives to break their way in, or Homelander had lasered them into oblivion. Regardless, there was no sign of anyone.
“Homelander?” you called out. 
No response. You looked around frantically for any sign of him.
You couldn’t lose him again, not even this terrifying version of him. “Homelander, where did you go?”
Silence again. Your pounding heart rang in your ears as you turned around, setting off for another part of the building in hopes of finding him. There wasn’t anyone else you could count on here, and for all his faults, he was the only person you trusted. 
Just when it felt hopeless and your brain was about to implode on itself at the sinking notion that maybe he was gone, a loud bang came from the other side of the bank where the vault was. You rushed over without a second thought for your own safety. Besides, the injury your duplicate had taken on your behalf was already healing. You'd do it a thousand times over if it meant keeping him safe.
Homelander stood in the middle of the previously empty vault, the two thieves knocked out, or maybe they were dead. It didn’t matter, because he clearly wasn’t.
“Where were you?” you asked, your voice cracking.
“I’ve been here the whole time.”
“No you haven’t. I came over here and there was no one. I called out for you and—“
“And what?”
“I wanna go home,” you cried, clinging to him. “Please, let’s just go home.”
He nodded, his superhuman strength allowing him to scoop you up in his arms with ease. You always felt safe in them, and you pressed your head to his chest, trying to focus on the sound of his heartbeat as he flew back to his suite at the tower.
His heart always beat faster than anyone else’s, having to maintain the life of the most powerful superhero to ever live. It was a heavy burden, though you tried your best to offset it, you sometimes felt too reliant on him. He never made you feel bad for it, neither version of him did.
You were still a bit dazed when he landed, shuffling into his living room and leaning against the back of the couch. He said he had been in the vault, but you knew it had been empty when you walked over to it. You knew what you saw.
“You did great with the lookout. I can help you train more, and we’ll try again in a few days,” he said. “I’ll get the crime analytics team to find us another softball one.”
“Homelander,” you began tentatively, “back there did you–did you do that on purpose? Disappear on me?”
“Of course not, darling, why would I do something like that after everything you've been through?” he asked, his voice soft enough that if you let yourself, you could pretend for a few moments he was your Homelander. “I told you, I was in the vault the whole time.”
“I can’t lose you again,” you said, your voice cracking. “I can’t—“
“You won’t. I’ve always been here. I love you.”
He’s lying, the voice in your head screamed, he’s not your John. There’s something wrong. 
You ignored it, choosing instead to kiss him, to drown out the rational with the feeling of your lover’s lips again. You would take this Homelander over none at all. “I love you too.”
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justcressida · 10 months
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How Do Record Of Ragnarok Characters Deal With Turkish Women?
(The reason why the reader behaves annoyingly towards the Greeks is because of the confusion of food and culture)
(Actually, they can't cope, but that's a secret. Also, the nationalist cat in me is acting, don't blame me)
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THOR
You look at his damn face and think he's calm, right? You're absolutely wrong.
You're not much different from a pair of rabid dogs. Thor isn't much of a social God, and no one can figure out how this guy came together with a chaotic leg.
He saw a lot, he didn't think he would be surprised by anything for the rest of his life... Until I met you.
You howled as you gave the middle finger to the Greek Gods??? Like a real wolf??
Really, truly in his immortal life, he had never been so surprised. He wasn't very interested in races, but when he learned that the Turks were descended from wolves, that strange gesture made sense
He observed that he was a very passionate person. You were proud to be proud of your culture and treated your ancestors with great respect.
You also said that you were going to make him eat a weird thing called kebab once and if he didn't like it you would shove the skewer used to cook the dish called kebab up his ass??
LOKİ
A scary couple that you have to run away from no matter what.
Similarly, he found you eating fish and grinning wickedly in front of Poseidon. You were eating while looking Poseidon in the eye, and Hades had to intervene to prevent Poseidon from killing you
FOUND IT VERY FUN
You are such a chaotic couple. Even Loki is sometimes very afraid of you, though. I mean, what madman would have a big 'National Anthem' painting made in the room and then have the entire Scandinavian Pantheon read it at knifepoint?
Whenever he doesn't like any Turkish food, you recite an epic of Turkish profanity to him, so he has learned to go to your senses.
Your favorite activity is to make people hell with life.
You speak so much Turkish that he knows all the Turkish swear words thanks to you.
BUDDHA
The love of his life.
Buddha always does whatever he wants, similarly you are the perfect couple as your favorite activity is breaking the rules.
Because his stomach is a black hole, you and your whole family are constantly cooking a lot for him. Your possessive attitude towards food surprises him a little, but at the end of the day, he doesn't care much because it's profitable.
You drive him crazy by speaking in Turkish. Really... You grin wickedly after saying a lot of Turkish things to kill him out of curiosity.
.... After a while, he ate so much lahmacun that his stomach hurt for a long time.
POSEİDON
The funny thing is that you do everything to drive Poseidon crazy, and what's even funnier is that you're married.
He might actually laugh if he stopped freaking out because of your disrespect, but for Atlantis' sake, why look at the sirens and "If we cut this, we'd make 2 pounds of anchovy pan... I'm craving it." What do you need to say?
(In Atlantis, everyone runs away from you because they're afraid you'll grill them)
He decided to stay away from you because you broke the painting 'Gençliğe Hitabe' to Apollo in his head.
... He is scared and aroused.
APOLLO
You broke a painting in his head and told him, and you said 'Yavşak piç'
He later found out that it meant "Squirrel bastard" and was defeated because of your audacity.
No one knows how you came together, but they're most surprised that you treat Apollo like shit.
"How are you today, little bitch?"
Although Apollo was partially accustomed to your chaotic behavior, what surprised him was that you loved each other by beating each other. When your best friend hit you on the buttocks in front of everyone, you tore her hair out and then hugged each other on the floor???
Also did you love each other by swearing???
Strange, but Apollo liked it
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getou2001 · 1 year
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c. redfield .. come on baby
You and Chris had been sent out together right after your messy breakup. 'Too into work' your ex would repeat. You're about to be really into some work.
Chris Redfield ;;
fuck away the pain — divide the day
You and Chris had been sent out together right after your messy breakup. 'Too into work' your ex would repeat. You're about to be really into some work.
You were no stranger to being alone with Chris, or frankly any other S.T.A.R.S man on missions. Though this time you were as distracted as ever. Right before you left home for Romania your long time boyfriend had pulled you aside and dropped the news on you.
"You're too into your work. This just.. this isn't working between us. I'm moving out while you're gone. Next month's rent has already been sent. Good luck."
As you stood in the forest covered in mud you were still thinking about it all. What had really prompted this? Work? But you were an important member. You had to be this 'into' work. Was there a real, underlying reason? The redhead across the street? Were you becoming boring? Did you leave the dishes out a night too long after you had come crashing onto the couch? Did you smell? Was it your new haircut? A million piling reasons popped into your head before you were nudged nearly falling over.
"Hey, come on. You've been standing there too long. See something weird?" Chris had come behind you to nudge you along. "We're almost there, don't get distracted now."
You nodded and kept on towards the torchlit village in the distance. You took another look back at Chris and saw the dedication you tried to mirror in your own work. Was he the reason you were such a hardass too? Did your boyfriend— ex—think you were in love with Chris? Or another man on your team? No. That couldn't have been. You turned forward again and jumped back at the sound of a wild dog running past you two. Thankfully not infected, or not yet.
"Chill out, (L/N) , you're freaking out. What has you so startled?" Chris didn't sound concerned, you knew this tone was code for 'cut it out and focus' so you buckled down.
"Nothing." You shot back, pushing back a bush and stepping into the opening. There was no one there at all. Where the fuck did they all go? A howl or two sounded in the distance but besides that it was your breathing and Chris' footsteps inching closer. "There's no one here."
"Clearly." He stepped up beside you and took another look around and then down at his watch, still timed for home, and then at you. "Well. I'm going to sleep before we get jumped this far past a nap."
In the moonlight his muscles glistened, shiny with sweat he got from the long trek here. His eyes also shined for the moment yours met. Kind of dreamy for a second. You snapped out of the trance and nodded, following suit silently.
When you two had finally found a place to settle that was left empty Chris didn't waste a second before checking every crevice. You opted to immediately slipping into a creaking bed. The only one, you realize when Chris stands beside you as soon as he's done with his rounds.
"Clear. Scoot over." He checked his gun's mechanics one more time before putting the safety on and lying it on the dresser nearby. "I am not sleeping on the floor."
You grumbled and moved closer to the wall and held out your own handgun. Chris repeated his checks and put the safety on before slipping in beside you. He took most of the bed up but at least he had the decency to hang halfway off the bed so it wasn't terrible.
After a few minutes you turned back over to watch Chris and noticed him staring at your weapons. "What?"
"Debating if I should take the mags out."
"Hm. Thinking I'm going to shoot you? I can put the mags back in, Chris." You snickered.
You didn't see it but you could hear him gasp a bit, turning towards you. "Was that a laugh, (L/N) ? Was it?" Slight amusement in his voice as well as a creeping smile.
You went into defenses, shaking your head and lightly shoving him which caused him to titter on falling onto the ground. "No! I didn't laugh. I was sighing! Sighing, disappointed at your stupidity. Why would I laugh on an important mission?"
You both sat there for a second smiling stupidly at each other before Chris shook his head and propped his head up with his arm, sitting up slightly. "I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before. Always so serious." He teased.
"Me? Serious? Look who's talking! Mister Alpha has some nerve to talk to me about being so serious." You followed his actions, propping yourself up on one arm. "I bet your girlfriend is ready to breakup with you too." You snickered.
"Too? You've finally gotten dumped? Lemme guess.." He tapped his chin. "You're too into work. You have no free time for me. You are always in the office." Chris bellowed a laugh. "Yeah, yeah. That shit hasn't happened for a while, but I remember it good."
You blushed a little hearing him in such a mood. "Yep!" With Chris now it didn't hurt to talk about it. It felt comforting, even. Unconsciously moving closer, you could smell Chris better from here. Deep musky tones, for sure. Or is that just the air? Either way it was mesmerizing. "Just like that.."
"Just like that." He repeated, scooting closer to you. His free hand moved, hovering around your hip before it pulled back and laid on the tiny area between you two. He looked around, whistling for a second before you spoke up.
"Oh, fuck it." Was the only warning you gave him before pulling him against your lips and tugging him onto the bed by his belt loops.
Chris pulled away from the kiss for a second to hiss an "Ah shit—" before diving back in for more.
You crawled up onto his lap without breaking the kiss. Moans being exchanged every few breaths, panting from both of you. His dick made a rock hard place to grind against. And grind you did. Pushing your hips against him while you struggled to stay on top. His rough hands grabbed your uniform pants and began tugging every direction to find which was going to bring them off. You broke the kiss to give him a hand, pulling them down and getting off just to struggle off Chris'.
A second later he got too impatient to get them entirely off so when they reached below his dick he yanked you back onto him. His face was calm as ever but his shaking hands showed restraint.
"C'mon.. c'mon.." He whimpered, puppy dog eyes beaming at you. How did Chris become the boy next door? He shoved his boxers haphazardly down and you moved your panties to the side. Chris put your hands on his shoulders and you took it as a warning. You gripped his black polo as tight as you could and he thrusted up into you. It was so perfect. Not entirely long but it was thick as ever. Perfect for you.
He groaned as soon as he felt inside of you, more of those cute whimpers escaping him. He wasted no time thrusting into you like a sex toy.
"Chris.. chris.." You whispered into his ear. You could feel the heat radiating off his cheeks even if the night didn't show it entirely. His thrusts became desperate very quickly. You sat up on his lap and almost tore the shirt as his dick hit the sweetest spot in you. Your sudden tightness set off alarms in him.
He grabbed your hips and flipped your positions. For a second he stopped, trying to remember where to abuse. "Right.. right here, yeah?" He slowly pushed against it. Your fist pounding on his chest confirmed it and he started the relentless thrusts. Each time they hit that spot. Your hand started dipping down to your forgotten clit but Chris pushed your hand aside.
"Ah.. allow me." Such a gentleman. His thumb rubbed the swollen bud so gently before he turned his hand and began to palm it. A small groan came from him and he changed positions once more so he could sit up and have you face outwards. A better position to focus on both parts. His mouth mindlessly kissed and nipped along your shoulders, thrusts getting shakier.
"Please.. please more.." He whispered against your ear, you could hear how needy he was for you. "More, more.. Ah.. Right there.." His voice melted into moans as he felt you tighten up once again.
"I'm gonna.." You whimpered, you could feel Chris nod behind you.
"Please do.. Please?" Chris whined, using his knees to spread your legs further apart. He continued palming and thrusting up into you. As soon as your pussy started to stammer and release he did as well. "So.. so good." He whimpered, placing more kisses along your shoulders as you both bottomed out. "So nice and warm.." The sleepiness was creeping into his voice.
You turned around and kissed his forehead. At least on his lap you could reach it. "That felt.. so good." You breathlessly laughed, settling down on his lap.
"Nice and warm.." he lazily repeated, drunk off your pussy. Laying back on the bed he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close. You snickered, feeling his dick deep inside again and decided to just stay there. Your legs wrapped around his and the two of you fell asleep. Chris' nice chest and arms as your pillows. Chris' nose breathing deep in your hair before nuzzling it and falling into his own slumber.
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pascaloverx · 5 months
Text
To Begin Again
ONE
Summary: You're a new teacher at a large and influential school. It's a risky step for you, as you've been running from your ex for almost two years. But when Dumbledore asks you to take on a class at the renowned Hogwarts, you can't refuse. However, your life as a newly arrived teacher won't be easy. Especially when the other teachers don't seem eager to make friends. Or rather, two teachers in particular: Sirius Black and Remus Lupin.
Author's Note: Welcome, dear readers. Please leave your comments if you enjoy fanfiction. This fanfic takes place almost in the real world (with the addition of werewolves) and is not a wizarding fanfic. There will be some differences and changes in things from the Harry Potter story or other fanfics in the HP universe, but I promise to do my best writing this fanfic. There will be a love triangle coming in this fanfic.
AO3 LINK TWO
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To flee is easier than to face your problems, than to confront the demons you left behind long ago. And your life has become an eternal escape. Not only moving from place to place, teaching from school to school, you were living a temporary life each time.  Until one day, a letter arrived, yes, a letter for you from London. It said that you were invited to teach temporarily at Hogwarts Academy. Dumbledore needed you. He was a great friend of your father. They even taught at the same time, but when you were born, your father and mother decided to move to the United States for some undisclosed reason. But Dumbledore's letter comes to you as a good excuse to cover your tracks. Restart.
"What a piece of crap. My cell phone is out of battery and I'm lost in the middle of nowhere." You mumble to yourself. No one is listening anyway. A beautiful full moon night is in front of you, lighting your way. Hogwarts, despite being influential, seems to be located in the middle of nowhere. You jump back when you hear a loud howl. Are there wolves near a school? Isn't that dangerous? 
You look at your phone wishing there was some battery left so you could call someone. Noticing that it might be dangerous, you walk towards what you think might be the path. One step hurriedly each time. But the howls get closer and closer. Until you see a sign saying that Hogwarts is nearby. But as soon as you look ahead you see a dog. I mean, something similar to a dog but bigger. Or will it be a very hairy man?
"Leave or I'll throw my suitcase at you. Whatever you are." You say threatening the furry creature with your suitcase. The creature seems to stare at you, but not understand you. At that moment you laugh at your foolishness. Now who in their right mind would try to reason with a creature that doesn't seem to reason?
"Listen, I don't want to hurt you. I'm against animal abuse and I've participated in campaigns to rescue many from the streets. But if you come any closer, I won't have any other choice." You speak and while the canine creature or something looks like it's ready to attack you. When the creature gets a little closer, you throw your suitcase at it. With all the strength and aim possible. And then you run. Run as fast as possible, hitting some trees along the way but maintaining your speed. You hear the creature's grunts of pain. Then everything is silent, you rest a little. Your legs hurt, your arms are sore and bruised. And then you hear a long howl that alerts you that the creature is coming. And then you run again, as fast as you can. 
"I can't believe I'm going to die here, like this." You mumble as you run. You're so distracted that you don't notice a stranger in front of you. Until you bump into him. Making you both fall.
"Fuck. Don't you watch where you're going?" The stranger speaks in a rude tone and you look at him in confusion.Isn't he noticing that you're running from death? Or is he not hearing the furry creature's noises?
"Shut up and follow me." You say, holding the stranger's hand and asking him to follow you. Why you helped him, you don't know. But you wouldn't be able to sleep with guilty conscience if he died. Strangely, he follows you a little further into the forest. But who designed a school that has a forest with ferocious animals on the loose? 
"Come here." The stranger pulls you close to a hiding place. Hideout that actually seems designed for this type of situation. It's a small hut covered in bushes. You think about saying something but the stranger covers your mouth and points outside. Your eyes follow the stranger's fingers and you observe the creature outside. From a distance this creature looks like something from another world, from a fantasy world. A werewolf better said.  The creature sniffs for a while and then disappears into the forest.
"You saw that?" You ask the stranger who is currently adjusting his somewhat long, silky, and slightly wavy hair. Sweat is dripping down his forehead, but he seems fine. I mean, he's attractive. I mean, what the hell are you thinking?
"I did see it, still got the ability to see after some lunatic knocked me down out of nowhere. And you're welcome, by the way." The man says as he rummages through a closet. You look at him indignantly. What do you mean you should be grateful to him?
"Sorry to wake you up from that illusion you're in, but it's you who should be thanking me. That creature was about to attack both of us, and I pulled you to come with me. So, Prince Charming, get off your imaginary horse and thank me yourself." You respond proudly, starting to feel the pain of the bruises you accumulated along the way. 
"If that's how you feel, would you prefer to go out into the forest right now and try your luck?" The man says mockingly, and you glare at him angrily. What an idiot.
"Look, I'm new around here, and I don't want to sound presumptuous, but you seem like a jerk. But unlike you, I'm going to appreciate your help. Thank you for helping me escape from the big hairy creature out there. Satisfied?" You say, swallowing your pride, and then you extend your hand to the stranger. He gives a smirk, almost charming. What a jerk.
"Very satisfied. But now that we're here, would you mind telling me your name? I find it strange to spend the night with someone whose name I don't even know." The man says, sitting on the wooden chair next to you. You, who are sitting in an armchair, look at him, feeling strange about the idea of spending the night together.
"My name is Y/N. And yours?" You speak to avoid seeming rude, but the truth is, you want to know the reason why you'll have to spend the night together.
"Sirius. Sirius Black." He pauses before continuing, "And before you wonder, we have to spend the night here because it's still out there. But don't worry, as soon as dawn breaks, I'll take you to Hogwarts." Sirius speaks, squeezing your hand firmly. You shake hands, and he looks at you as if trying to unravel all your secrets.
"How do you know I want to go to Hogwarts?" You ask, and he smiles as if he finds it amusing.
"Let's just say I have a good sixth sense. Now, I suggest you rest. Tomorrow will be quite a day for you." Sirius says, handing you a pillow and a blanket. You thank him softly as you watch him grab another pillow and lie down on the floor. It looks uncomfortable, but you're too tired to be polite and offer to sleep on the floor instead.
"Hey, Sirius. Thank you so much for today. I might not be alive without you." You say sweetly and sleepily as you settle into the armchair. Sirius lifts his head and looks in your direction. Wow, he's handsome.
"I echo your words. The only difference is that I'd be alive with or without you. But I'm grateful for the company. It tends to be pretty boring around here." Sirius replies before turning over to sleep. You try not to dwell too much on what he said and then let sleep finally take hold of you. When morning comes, Sirius seems a bit more grumpy than before. You deduce that he might not be a morning person. You both leave the cabin early and walk for a while towards Hogwarts. The journey feels almost endless, but when you finally arrive, you're dazzled. The beauty of the architecture almost makes it worth almost dying to get in here.
"Well, princess, you're delivered. I won't be able to come in with you because I need to go check on something, but I'm sure we'll see each other again soon. Until then, take care. I won't always be here to save you." Sirius says, kissing the palm of your hand before leaving without giving you a chance to respond. You find him presumptuous but decide to move on.
Walking through the corridors of Hogwarts, you observe children playing from side to side. A boy with glasses and dark hair is hitting another boy with white hair on the ground, which startles you. You immediately run towards them. As you approach, you manage to separate the two, pulling the dark-haired one off the light-haired one. They both seem a bit bruised, and as you separate them, you realize that the effort has caused you significant pain in your back.
"You shouldn't be fighting. At least I think so." You say with some difficulty as you feel the pain growing. It's strange that despite the dark-haired one being the aggressor, he seems to take you more seriously. Meanwhile, the light-haired one is smiling mockingly with his arms crossed.
"And who are you to say anything?" Asks the child, around eleven or twelve years old, with a bruised face but intact hair. He's the one with the light hair.
"You must be thick, Malfoy, if you didn't notice that she must be our new teacher. Or maybe I hit you too hard." The dark-haired boy responds, already angry again. He seems both fearless and temperamental.
"Stop. Both of you! I don't want to hear insults or nonsense in my presence. You, with the white hair, I am your new teacher, so I suggest you change your tone when speaking. And you, with the dark hair, violence is not a solution to anything, not even insolence. Both of you, go far away from each other and think about how to be better." You speak calmly but very seriously. Despite their reluctance, both boys stop fighting and move on.
You feel the pain in your back get worse and walk to the first place you see an adult. Until you find a room, which seems almost abandoned. There is no one inside. You observe the room that has some old books scattered around and appears to be someone's room. 
"Can I help you?" A male voice speaks from behind you. You turn around nervously thinking it's rude to enter someone else's room. 
"I need help..." You were going to say more, but you were startled when you noticed a mark on the face of the man in front of you. You figured he must be in pain.
"There's no need to be afraid. I got involved in a mess last night and was a little injured." The man says getting closer and you feel like you're being rude.
"I'm sorry, I imagine it hurts. I'm sorry for my rudeness." You say, getting a little closer and looking deep into the man's eyes. Eyes you felt you've seen before.
"No need to apologize. It really hurts. My name is Remus and this is my room." Remus speaks as you watch him and before you can say anything, you simply pass out. 
                       
 To be continued...
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dinocanid · 8 months
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If you read Xem's post, you will see that she states you should know the basics about that animal before confirming it. You should know that a wolf is a canine that is a pack hunter that lives mostly in the northern hemisphere. That they howl and usually hunt deer or some deer relative. The have fur and are pursuit predators. Those are the basics. No one except you and your friends said you're only a real wolf therian if you can name top ten unusual facts about wolves. How can someone confirm a wolf if they do not know what a wolf is? You yourself said that you differ from wild wolf behaviours. So you know you're not a wild wolf because of that. But twist words and play the victim I guess.
The OP claimed, very blatantly, that if you make a mistake about some species fact that someone else considers "basic knowledge" then they shouldn't be allowed to identify as that species anymore and should be gatekept from the label. Said basic knowledge included very common and easy-to-make mistakes. Someone can identify as a hyena without knowing at first they are feliforms and not caniforms, the OP said that they can't. Someone can identify as a wolfdog or a leopard, and mistake a wolfdog for a husky mix or a jaguar for a leopard in a photo. That happens, they can look very similar to each other. Idk how to explain that a hyena looks like a dog(canine), just like a thylacine looks like a dog. You can go most of your life before finding out the former is related to cats and the latter is related to kangaroos. You can put a leopard and a jaguar next to each other and it is difficult as hell to tell the difference a lot of times. Not all wolfdogs look like wolves, some just look like dogs especially if they're low content. Some dogs just look like wolfdogs or wolves without being wolf hybrids. See: the pile of movies and shows with "wolves" in it (it's wolf-like dogs being casted as wolves, lots of people don't notice). It's not common knowledge, it's fun facts you might stumble across in a "10 Things You Didn't Know About These Strange Animals" YouTube compilation at 3am.
The OP was stating very clearly that your identity becomes invalid the moment you fail a game of spot-the-difference. The OP post is capped off with:
"So yeah. You should know a lot about the animal you claim to be. If not? Don’t claim it."
I'm gonna be blunt that the OP had one of the most rancid takes I'd seen in a while. Knowing the creature exists was not stated anywhere in the post to be enough, you have to "know a lot".
Someone might not know that animal's realistic behaviors, or where they all live geologically, or what all of their body language means. Someone can know their theriotype before they figure out that later stuff, it's happened all the time and continues to happen. This also isn't covering non-earthly animal identities and how you can't even do ecological research on those. Someone can't go on wikipedia and read up on the ecology of their specific dragon species that has zero record of ever existing. Plenty of those with non-earthly animal identities are not less real as a result, it is an absolute buckwild take that earthly animal identities are somehow different with a higher bar of entry. That's not even mentioning people that identify as earthly animals with unrealistic ecology, because that's also a thing.
For the second part of your ask, I'm guessing you're referring to this recent one. You missed this entire chunk of the post:
"...I do not know most things about wolves off the top of my head. Don't ask me anything about wolf ecology outside the bare basics, I couldn't tell you. When I was really young I thought my nonhuman identity was a dog until one day I had the epiphany that I was actually a wolf. I didn't have to bury my head in research to figure that out, I just knew for not much reason. Any information on wolves I know today is stuff I picked up here and there over the years, independent of my identity"
To condense all of that into something shorter: I just knew I was a wolf before I knew much of anything about wolves. I didn't know I wasn't a wild wolf because I know a lot about wild wolf behavior. I genuinely don't know how that conclusion was drawn after reading that.
"Wolves are canines that live in packs and eat deer" isn't research, that's "I watched a movie once that had wolves in it", which is honestly the extent of what a lot of people know about wolves unless they're invested or something. That's not enough according to the OP, and if that's not what was meant then the entirety of the post was worded extremely poorly.
And this last part isn't related to anon, but I've seen a lot of responses since yesterday about "but why is research bad"? No one has said that it was, and I scroll the alterhuman tags almost daily. That's not something people are arguing. The point isn't "research bad, grr learning about animals sucks", the point is that this discourse is old. Like, old as hell. We're not gatekeeping nonhuman identities based on if you "know a lot" going in. We're not going to claim someone isn't a "real therian" if they get one thing wrong about their theriotype.
Let's say that someone is a leopard therian and posts a picture of a jaguar in some moodboard or something. You know the decent thing to do? You might let them know one of the photos is actually a jaguar, which will usually get you a "oh huh, thanks. didn't catch that". At no point do you suddenly have imply they aren't a "real" leopard therian. You can ask if they've maybe considered jaguars, but they are fully able to respond "yeah but no, I'm a leopard". And that's fine. Someone can be a hyena therian, accidentally say that hyenas are canines. It is absolutely fine and possible to say that hyenas are feliforms without pointing fingers and going "you're not a real hyena, because real hyenas would've known that already".
It's not 2012 anymore, we've grown past this. It is the strangest thing ever to see in the year two-thousand-twenty-four.
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ladyelissarose · 1 year
Text
‘Slow Ride’
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Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x female civilian reader - Y/n is used.
The story is all in Jake’s POV.
Summary; Jake is looking for someone new, trying to find the one he wants forever. But he comes across obstacle after obstacle while trying, thinking he’ll still lose in the end. But what if he’s proven wrong?
Warnings: mentions of one slightly suggestive thought, Jake being a really shy guy behind his facade of being a cocky pilot, overall it’s Fluffy and sfw
“Hangman!! You’re unfortunately the only one with great taste in music!! So fix that damn jukebox to something that awakens this place!!”
And that was Javy ‘Coyote’ Machado howling across the Hard Deck to the one and only me, Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin. Now, the only reason why the music was so dead today, was because my frienemy Bradley ‘Pussy- ehem… ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw just got his hand slammed on his dumb (a very nice truck) Bronco’s car door. So yeah, that hand of his was so swollen I thought it was his foot for a second. But no, it was still his hand, but just swollen. So I, with the pride of being known for having a great taste in music, I confidently walked towards the jukebox. Honestly, I didn’t even spare any woman that gawked at me a second of my attention, cause I was about to fuck the damn jukebox into oblivion with my greatest hits. I knew I was good looking, my eyes were brightly jaded, my skin was so well tanned after playing dog-fight football with my Dagger Squad. (My team won by the way) and my hair, can’t go wrong with that. I even beat the girls in all kinds of fashion competitions, they don’t stand a chance against me. Oh and my white t-shirt fit on me so nicely, all my workouts at 5am were showing off, and my Wranglers… yeah, about those. (I overheard Rooster tell my girl frienemy Natasha ‘Phoenix’ Trace that my ass looked good in these.) So yeah, I looked great and had the will power to give or deny attention to anyone. I’d get what I wanted in the end, with whoever was lucky enough to have me. Even though for the passed few months, I haven’t gone home with anyone… I grew out of one-night stands, only because I didn’t feel the same hype anymore. Before I was alright with waking up from a great night with no one next to me to prove it, but now… I craved and desired to have a beauty to wake up to and have forever. But anyways, I was now at the jukebox winking at Rooster who was having his hand nursed by Penny Benjamin, the owner of Hard Deck and the girlfriend of my boss, Pete ‘Maverick’ Mitchell. My full attention then went on this gorgeous piece of machinery, I caressed it’s side as I spoke to it, (yes, I was in desperate need of attention)
 “Helloooo gorgeous.. so what are we playing today? Huh girl? Do we stick to 86? Slow Ride? Yup, I thought so too baby girl.”
 I let my finger fall on the numbers ‘8’ then ‘6’. Soon I was waiting to hear the boring music change into the sound of Heaven’s choir in Rock. My chest puffed up and my face warmed at the first beat I heard, 
‘Damnnn I could fuck this song..’
Diiiing!!!
I heard the door open, and my eyes followed it to see who had arrived, but… that’s when my heart dropped, in… adoration? The beat of the song continued to flow, as my green eyes found home on the most, mother natured, beautiful woman. God, I felt like I was going through palpitations as I watched her move in sync to the music, as if it was her own theme song. My knees were so ready to bend and hit the floor at her command, that’s just how powerful and strong her presence felt. Her skin was so unrealistically glowy, like if it was covered in the right amount of glitter. Oh! And her hair, shining in the light in its authentic shade of color made me want to run my fingers through it and feel it softness. Her bright smile was so real and graciously given to everyone, lighting up the room with every step she took. Everything on her adorning face was so perfect, I’d be damned if I put a name to it to compare it to anyone, because she was so unique and incomparable. My breath left my lungs at the sight of her goddess-sculpted body, the sundress she wore situated on her sweet curves so nicely, oh how I wished my hands could find a place on them, just to have the true word to say I was worthy to hold someone of pure ecstasy. I watched her every move, from the minute she walked in and took a deep breath at the entrance. I saw how she took each step so confidently yet slowly. How as she arrived to the bar, she helped the older man pick up his cap from the floor and return it. How she greeted Penny with utter happiness and a tight hug over the counter. Her fingers twisted her hair playfully as she went on to giggle about something Penny said, damn… if I could only hear how heavenly it most likely sounded, oh I’d want to hear it on repeat until I lost my hearing. 
 ‘…. what a slow… gorgeous ride.. who the hell is she-‘
 “Jake you’re such a freakin’ creep-“
“-SHIT!”
I jumped at the sudden voice and turned around to see the only and only Bradshaw break my moment of adoration, he was wearing a smolder but with a smirk, his brow raised high as he popped his hip at me. I clapped my sides to show my frustration,
“What the fuck Bradley-“
“What the fuck you Jake? Phoenix told me that you’ve had your damn eyes on her best friend sense she arrived.”
 ‘Oh shit..’
I took a swig of the beer I just stole from Bradley’s hand to drain out my thoughts as he went on to admit in a low tone,
 “Listen, I know she’s hot and all-“
 I choked on the beer as I corrected with a finger on his chest, poking lightly,
 “No Bradshaw… she’s not hot.”
He stared at me with confusion as he whispered with a hand now on my shoulder,
 “what?”
I leaned closer and confessed,
“That right there… is a goddess on this damned earth, Rooster. Hot is an understatement.”
 I probably sounded like a mad man because Bradley was looking at me like I was, but then his face changed in seconds and now he was giggling like an idiot. I punched his arm lightly as I scowled at him,
 “What!? Why are you giggling like a little girl Bradshaw-“
 “I can’t believe the one and only Seresin has been whiplashed by that girl, of all people.”
 ‘Of all people? What’s that supposed to mean?”
 “What are you talking abo-“
 “- first of all, she denies every guy, like EVERY guy. And plus, my girl Phoenix doesn’t let anyone around her… or at least anyone she thinks isn’t worthy enough for her friend. She’s a protective friend to her.”
I could feel my chest pinch a little with sadness and hopelessness, only because if Phoenix was this goddess’ protector, I wouldn’t be able to get to her. (Because I’m one of Phoenix’s greatest frienemies.) 
Ughh!!! Damnit but I want her! I NEED her!! To hold her so close to me until she becomes one with me or- or like blends into me- I don’t know!!! Anything that keeps her in my reach and never let’s go. I’d kill to run up to her and kiss her blushed cheeks and intertwine my fingers with hers, get the smallest whiff of what heaven probably smells like. Man I’d make it my most important heartfelt mission, to give her complete and irrevocable happiness… she’d never have to pursue it, I’d just give it to her in any way I possibly could. If she wanted the stars or the moon, I’d find a way to hand it to her personally and wrapped up with a pretty bow. I don’t even know what her voice sounds like, ‘Slow Ride’ continues to play loudly over my head blocking it away from my desperate ears. But I’m more than 100% sure, that the minute I hear it, I won’t ever have enough of it for forever. Imagine waking up to that melody? Or being the cause of that melody? Damnnn… The things I would do to get those pretty sounds out of her… even if it was just for a moment- wait a FUCKING minute!! She’s drinks… oh my God she’s definitely a dream.
 “The goddess drinks Old Fashion… man in all the years of my life I’ve never seen a woman drink an Old Fashion.. that makes her so so much more amazing-“
“HANGMAN!!”
Once again I was freaking snapped out of my trance, by the same old Rooster cock-o-doodling in my ear.
 “Bro you’ve got to get a grip of yourself you drooled all over the floor-“
 My instincts pulled my fingers to instantly check my lips and chin, but I found I wasn’t wet from drool, because I hadn’t drooled.
 “Bradley I thought you had left-“
 “-No, I hadn’t… I was trying to tell you that there will be a bonfire going on right outside of here in a few minutes… and she’s going to be there-“
My chest warmed up like it was set on fire as I gasped,
 “REALLY?!”
I perked over Bradley’s broad shoulders to make sure she was still there, but he pushed me down and scolded lowly,
“Jacob. No one’s going to get her… I’ll make sure of it- I’m mean… you don’t even know if she’ll like you.. your heart will be broken.”
 I pouted at Bradley’s words, he’s so fucking right.
‘I literally could be making an idiot of myself for her and she might not even see me.. well damn that sunk faster than the Titanic-‘
“Hey hey hey… don’t weary yet my pal.. there’s still a chance… you’re still in the ‘What If’ point.”
 I could feel my shoulders sink a little as I looked at Bradley worriedly, man I was really taking his words personally and really needed more. So in the bliss moment of us being nice to each other (for once) I asked for more advice. (I mean he pulled off getting to date Phoenix and get her to fall head over heels for him. So he knows how to work in this kind of field of love) 
 “So.. what do I do then… I’ve never done this before.. you know my history with girls-“
 “-Forget about them… that’s gone.”
He patted my chest lightly as he went on,
“… Just, be yourself and try not to change too much or over impress. You want someone to love or like you for who you really are. Kind of forget that they’re there, and just enjoy your night, and be that charming gentleman you are.. maybe you might pull it off.”
 ‘Man Rooster… you’re my platonic soulmate… we’re we married in another life? Ha! Perhaps. Hot bastard.’
I clapped Bradley’s cheek softly, showing my sincere appreciation. He winked at me and nodded before walking away. As soon as my eyes left him I was immediately looking for that goddess, 
 ‘Come on where are you? I just need to make sure you’re still here-‘
“Hi handsome! You babyguarding the jukebox?”
 Suddenly out of the blue this girl pops in front of me as she bounced on her heels, looking at me with huge blue eyes. I mean she was cute, but wait out of my league after I saw the goddess. Which her presence got me annoyed right away because she was taking time away from me as I was looking for my girl. I then realized I was blocking the jukebox and replied shortly but politely,
 “Sorry, Go ahead ma’am.”
She then squeaked loudly and chuckled a little to hard as she said,
“Oh! Can’t wait to tell my friends you just called me ‘ma’am’!! Such a sweet man.”
She continued to bounce on her heels excitedly and giggle, I only smiled back as I was trying to be polite and make her not feel awful or weird about her over obnoxious behavior? I then was about to move over but her finger landed on my chest as she pushed on,
 “Oh don’t move honey, you’re ok right there.”
She then began to lower her finger, and got me a little disgusted, cause I didn’t like how it felt. 
 ‘Ok you’re pushing to far with your acrylics running down my nice white shirt.’
“Ok that’s enough there-“
 “My friend said no buddy, now back off!”
‘Woah! Was that Phoenix’s voice? Where’s Bradley?’
I immediately forgot the girl was there clawing for my attention as I then averted my eyes and ears towards the door, where Bradley was trying to guide a couple of men outside, but Phoenix and the goddess were trying to get someone off of them too while sitting at the bar. He was a tall man, truck driver looking guy.
 ‘You better back off buddy- OH HELL NO!! Who in God’s name is that prick?! Why’s he getting close to her- OH HE WANTS TO TOUCH HER WAIST??- OH!! Oh shit… nice punch Phoenix- OH OH!! She can fight too.. she got him right in the nuts… that what he gets for trying to touch her.’
 I seriously just witnessed these two women knock out this guy, he looked like those kind of men that don’t take ‘no’ for an answer and have disrespectful grabby hands. Those kind of men make me angry, I hate when they treat women like toys and hurt them, they don’t belong here in Hard Deck or anywhere. 
 ‘I’m getting him out of here-‘
“Did you hear what I said? Or are you too busy think about me-“
 I groaned lowly as I finally put out kinda straightforwardly, because this chick had not left my side yet!! 
 “No, I’m not. Now excuse me.”
I heard her whimper but I didn’t give a damn as I left the jukebox. And before I knew it, my hands had found this man’s collar, and I picked up his sagging body from the floor, he looked drunk and old.
 ‘What a pig.’
 He didn’t even help himself stand up, so I began to drag him out while I sputtered out threats,
 “You come in here again to hurt or bother anyone I will make sure it’s the last thing you do-“
 Then this manpig tried to explain drunkenly,
 “I was jus’ tryin’ ‘ave fun!!”
I glared at the guy being pulled by his collar by me,
“Yeah! Well I don’t like your version of fun!! So take it somewhere else and don’t ever come back!!”
 I pushed him through the open doors and watched him fall on his face in the sand. I didn’t spare time to check if he was ok, screw him.
‘Asshole…’
“Jake! Thanks!!”
I whipped my head towards the familiar warm voice, of course, it was Penny. She was holding out a beer for me that made me head towards her. As I got closer she confessed,
 “He’s been bothering us for a while now… but today he got worse-“
She lowered her voice while shaking her head disappointedly,
 “Trying to touch my girls-“
Then Penny looked back at me and went on,
 “But I hope your threat keeps him out. This is on the house.”
 I smiled at Penny and took the cold beer,
 “Thank you ma’am… if he’s ever back you let me know. I’ll deal with him first then I’ll call the cops. You have my word.”
 “I do… Thanks for taking care of that as usual.”
 “Of course.”
Then I noticed by the corner of my eye that a woman was right next to me, as she pushed her empty glass forwards towards Penny’s reach and kindly said, 
“Thanks Penny, keep the change.”
I subtly watched the short interaction as Penny begged her to keep the $15 of change but she insisted it was a nice tip then. She turned to look at me while trying to slide off the tall stool, and nicely said,
 “Excuse me.”
I quickly moved out of the way, but held my hand out without a second thought, she took it right away and helped herself off, and smiled while looking at the ground shyly,
 “Thank you.”
I kept my eyes on my beer as I replied kindly,
“You’re welcome.”
 She then turned around and walked off, now allowing me to see who it was, and I didn’t notice who it really was until she was already walking off,
‘NO FUCKING WAY!! Omg.. that was her… the goddess- I-I just talked- stupid how come you didn’t look at her. Spare her a glance!??-‘
 “Are you going to stay for the bonfire? Mav is already setting it up, I’ll be out in 10 when we close. A few regular customers will be there alongside you pilots.”
 I snapped out of my personal scolding as I looked through the window to see the sun setting and some familiar people outside with Maverick around a pile of wood. They all looked happy and relaxed… So I replied to Penny,
 “Yes, I’ll be there. Do you need anything before I go?”
 From under the counter she pulled out a large basket that held the contents to make s’mores, and a large box of caprisuns. 
 “Take these for you kids, and that should be it. You can go already, don’t worry about me-“
“-Are you sure?-“
“Jake, I’m positive… you already kicked out the guy and I’ll be fine. Rooster lent me his wooden bat from high school to protect myself. And Phoenix got me a pepper spray.”
 I huffed a small laugh as she showed me her items, I felt a little more relieved.
 “O-Ok… sounds great. I’ll see you in a minute.”
 “You too son, go on.”
San Diego had the best weather for the evening, it wasn’t as hot anymore, and the breeze was warm like a cozy blanket. I walked down towards the bonfire that was already lit and growing little by little. There were sitting logs all around it, maybe two people fit on each, but it looked comfortable. So I made my presence known in my favorite line as I approached my buddy Javy, mostly called Coyote by me and everyone else,
 “Evil be gone, Hangman’s coming!”
Coyote turned his head towards me and flashed me his biggest smile as he teased,
 “More like Santa Claus, cause you brought us gifts!!”
 I chuckled at his idiocy but immediately warned him as I saw his hands ready to snatch a pouch of caprisun,
 “Hey! Get your damn hands out of here! Wait til we all sit down-“
Mickey aka Fanboy, one of the pilots I treated like a little brother came along at hearing my bantering and said,
 “Sharing is caring Bagman! Didn’t know you packed snacks soccer mom!”
 ‘Ok now that’s not cool!’
I defended myself rightfully,
 “Hey I got this basket from Penny, I was just helping her out-“
 Of course Reuben aka Payback had to add to the tea,
 “Awww he’s helping his mommy like a good ol’ boy!!”
I heard Phoenix laugh out loud as she too joined in,
 “Such a golden boy Bagman- ooooo s’mores!! Hey Y/n!! They have s’mores! Your favorite!”
‘Y/n? Who’s Y/n- oh! OH! Y/n… such a beautiful name for a goddess… man she looks even better while close up- ok keep it together Bagman! Stay cool, stay you!’
My heart just about stopped beating when the presence of this goddess walked closer up to me and cheered happily like a little girl,
 “Oooooo!! I haven’t had these for a minute!! Was it your idea to bring them along mister?”
I didn’t realize I was inthralled by her in silence until I felt a kick in my shin and Bradley scowling at me. I held in a groan of pain as I replied realizing she was talking to ME!
“I-I uh- no. Um Penny- it was her idea.. I just brought them o-out.”
Her eyes found mine as she smiled cutely and giggled, I guess at my mediocre response that was filled with stuttering.
 “Oh ok! Well hey you’re a part of it if you brought them out right?”
I felt my cheeks grow so hot I had to look away and pretend that the package of Hershey chocolate bars was damn more interesting than her as I replied,
 “Uh- Yeah! Yeah yeah.”
 “Alright I’m here now!! I left a door open in case y’all needed the restroom or something.”
 Rooster came close and whispered in my ear subtly,
“Yeah yeah? Seriously?”
I glared at him as everyone looked at Penny who had just arrived. I took that chance to glance at Y/n who was smiling at Penny, but kept looking back at the basket I was holding. She was eyeing the caprisuns. Instantly I grabbed the basket in a different way and used a free hand to pull one out and hand it to her,
 “here-“
“Awww thanks!! I tell ya he’s such a sweet soul.”
That was the blue eyed girl who was annoyingly back, snatching away the drink I held out for Y/n. Y/n stepped back and shyly looked away, she looked sorry for even trying to reach out for the caprisun, which made me feel upset. I then saw a hand being shoved in my face as that voice squeaked,
 “I’m Beverley! I’m a Baywatch girl here on this beach. I’ve seen you play with your friends before.”
 ‘You spy on me? Ew.’
 I didn’t want to shake her hand, so I held it under the basket as if I needed to hold it with two hands as I calmly replied,
 “That’s nice- Um Bradley! Want a drink?”
Bradley’s eyes found mine as he let go of Phoenix’s waist and quickly gave her a kiss on the cheek, as he saw me sending him puppy eyes of desperation, he was smart enough to know what was happening as this Beverley kept staring at me. He jogged towards me while saying,
 “Sure Jake, thanks pal. Hey Beverley, uh I thought you had a party to go to, I remember you telling Nix about it-“
 “Oh it’s ok!! I prefer being here with you guys!!!”
 ‘More like prefers to try and get the guys!!’
Phoenix then all of a sudden called her over for some reason, saying something about her having to grab some napkins at the bar, hence sending her away from me. I sighed in relief when she ran off to the Hard Deck. I knew Phoenix was a savior and had my back while she sent me a wink as she approached me whispering,
 “She works for Penny, although she does a great job, she’s not a good girl. At least not for you ok?”
 I nodded right away,
 “Ok, thanks… for getting her off of me.”
“Anytime.”
She then went back into Bradley’s arms, leaving me alone for a minute, until I heard a soft voice ask,
 “May I grab one?”
Of course it was Y/n, probably now worried to grab without asking, but I made sure she knew she could grab as much as she wanted as I smiled,
 “Of course, don’t have to ask ok?”
She sent me a small smile while raising her hand to grab one, I instinctively lowered the basket so she could grab one easily. 
Her doe eyes already glistened with the light of the fire hitting them, but I could swear they glowed brighter as she took it from the basket, her fingers brushing against it as she beamed,
 “thank you!”
My mouth went dry for gods sake before I could respond, so I dumbly shook my head with the best smile my nervous self could offer. But she seemed to appreciate it, because she sent me a gorgeous toothy smile before working on opening her caprisun. Soon Penny walked up to me and cooed like a mother, not helping the fact that my wing buddies kept teasing me about being a ‘mommy’s boy’,
 “Jake, son, you could’ve put the basket down. It’s a picnic basket so it can go on the sand. Let’s set it here in the middle so everyone can reach.”
 I let out a simple ‘oh’ and listened attentively and followed her simple instructions. I then stood up to my full height and stretched a bit, while watching stupid Bradley come up to me while swaying his hips like a model and mimicking in a high pitched voice,
 “Jakey, son, I want the basket here instead-“
 “Bradley leave him alone or he’ll push you into the water like last time.”
‘Thanks Mavdad.’
It was nice that Maverick treated me nicely too, always being on my side when needed. He patted my shoulder before picking up a caprisun, and walking off so calmly after giving me a smile. I felt bigger than Rooster as I ‘threatened’,
 “He’s right Bradshaw, so be nice to me.”
Phoenix smacked both our arms at once as she scolded,
“Hangster! Sereshaw! Whatever you two like to be called, don’t start or we’ll tie you up til midnight. Now sit down.”
 Coyote put his hands on his hips as he mocked the both of us,
 “Now sit down boys-“
 “-Shut up Coyote. Nuh- uh, move over I’m sitting next to Bob, Rooster and Hangman can have each other tonight. I’ll take Bob.”
I watched Bob blush lightly as Phoenix ruffled his hair then bopped his nose as she situated herself next to him. He was usually very quiet (a stealth pilot in the flesh) but he was great company. A couple of times when I couldn’t sleep at night. I’d call him over to the near by cafe and we’ll literally just sit in silence and read each other’s newspapers until our coffee ran out. Or he’d do the same. Anyways. I sat down like Phoenix asked after I got my pouch. Without realizing who sat next to me, on my left, because Rooster sat on my right on a different log. I began to smell something sweet. Like cashmere woods? But with a hint of vanilla? Smelled like something you’d want to walk into after a long day, and just find comfiness in that aroma. That was until I heard the sweetest voice ask me,
 “Is it ok if I sit here?”
‘Oh holy cow… there’s no way.’
“Uh..”
The words ‘Yes have a seat’ were hanging off my tongue but wouldn’t come out!! I was acting like an idiot, but before I could say anything, that DAMNED squeaky voice god forsakenly returned,
“I took this spot already sweetie! See my sweater there? You can sit next to me on the next log though?”
Y/n raised her bows slightly and sent her a small smile,
 “oh, sorry. Sure.”
 I frowned at seeing this chick’s sweater next to me, claiming the spot.
 ‘How did I not see the stupid sweater!??’
 And I couldn’t move away, cause then I’d look like an ass for leaving her alone, because the rest of the spots were taken. So Beverley sat next to me, as I watched my girl walk slowly away after giving me an apologetic smile, she sat at the next log, but she was accompanied by Coyote, who made her feel welcome by patting her upper back with a small talk. 
 ‘At least I know she’s safe with Javy… he’ll keep her safe and good company.’ 
 I then felt vey uncomfortable, Beverley kept scooting closer to me, bumping into me quite on purposely. She giggle it off and squeak out ‘sorrys’. But I did my best to ignore her as Maverick began to tell his good old stories about his days with his pal Iceman. His best friend and Wingman. Those stories always made my heart sore with warmth, they were so real and very relatable sometimes. On the funny parts of the stories or when Penny and Mav would playfully argue back and forth about him exaggerating some parts I could hear the sweetest melody of laughter near by, and it was Y/n who would throw her head back and laugh so freely. I’d feel myself smile at such a lovely sight, she was so carefree and involved. Soon conversations were held between one another, as we enjoyed our s’mores that Penny made and passed out. (She really likes to treat everyone like her kids, and enjoys doing everything for us, like a mother would.) Y/n had gotten up with Phoenix to help her out, they were happy swaying with one another while toasting the marshmallows and listening to Bradley try to play the ukulele with a hurt hand.
 ‘Damn I wish I could take a picture of her and frame it above my bed-‘
“Do you have a girlfriend?”
“Gooooooood damnit… here we go. Be brave and short Jake.’
 “No I don’t, but I’m happy without it for now. I like being alone.”
I made sure to be so damn clear. But I could see the gears turn in her head as she went on,
 “Oh! That’s ok, I feel the way sometimes too, maybe we could practice dating if you like-“
 “Noooo I’m fine.. haha.. yeah. Seriously.”
She sent me a small frown but then scoffed in a tone she thought sounded seductive,
 “You’re just afraid of having a good girl like me around huh? Just admit it Jake.”
 ‘Yeahhhh no.’
I laughed it off, still trying to be nice, 
“I’m not afraid of anyone, I just don’t want someone right now-“
And that’s when my words pushed to her to make a move that had me standing up, she had placed her hand on my thigh, but WAYYY up my thigh and squeezed it,
 “Ok! I-I-“
Everyone looked at me shocked at worriedly, like if I was the crazy one when I abruptly stood up. Silence filled the area for a few seconds which drove me nuts right away. I then collected my thoughts for a split second as I said,
 “I’ll be right back.”
I then didn’t spare anyone a glance as I darted towards the restroom, hoping I wasn’t being followed by anyone. 
I took a few minutes to wash my face with cold water, and cool down. I got a little upset at the whole situation, wishing that this girl Beverley hadn’t ruined it, I had my chance with Y/n, but she took it away. Maybe now Y/n thinks that I don’t want anyone in my life, because I had said that quite out loud, and then I was stuck next to Beverley who was all over me and talking so loud and so much, acting like if we were together and stuff. I now wanted to go home, but at the same time I didn’t... I wanted to see Y/n one more time. 
 ‘Maybe I’ll say I had too many s’mores and say goodbye. That’ll give me a chance to see her one last time-‘
Knock knock knock!
I stiffened while leaning over the sink, if it had been one of the guys they would’ve just walked in, but this person knocked, meaning it was a girl. 
 ‘Please don’t be Beverley! please don’t be Beverley!-‘
 “Hi Jake, um… it’s me Y/n. Phoenix wanted me to check on you.. are you ok?”
‘Oh! Damn an angel has arrived.’
My feet took me to the door immediately and my hands opened it right away, my breath left my lungs once again as there she stood, with a concerned look on her face. 
 “I- uh. Yes, I’m ok… just needed a breather. Too much s’mores you know?”
She nodded with a small huff of laughter, 
“Yeah… I had like 4 already… but uh, you sure you’re ok? Phoenix thought you were a little off, And I thought the same.”
‘So you were watching me? Did you see I was in desperate need of your attention? Of your hands on me, your eyes on me? How I crave YOU?’
By then we had walked toward the bar, away from the restroom as I answered,
“Yeah, I’m ok. Thanks for…”
And the words died on my lips, as I finally focused on her, beaming in the light of the moonlight shining through the windows. I couldn’t describe it, oh god I couldn’t. If I could wake up to this everyday, I’d be a happy man forever. Satisfied to the brim, never letting go. Her height reached up to my chest, which I thought was the most adorable thing, I could embrace her and cover her with my arms, keeping her completely safe. My heart beat wildly in my chest, and I couldn’t get enough air in my lungs, she definitely took my breath away. She hadn’t said a word either, she just looked up at me, with hope and what looked like love in her eyes. And that… was when my desperation to claim her caught on, I leaned forward quickly towards her and closed my eyes. Waiting to feel-
 “Oh! Jake..”
She whispered my name as she stopped me by putting a hand on my chest, her eyes now wide. I immediately regretted it and felt stupid and wrong, 
‘How could I be so stupid?!’
“I’m so sorry- that was so wrong-“
 “Tell me the truth.”
‘What?’
I was confused as I asked,
“Wait what?”
She kept her hand on my chest as she repeated out of breath,
“Tell me the truth, if you really want this too I’m all in.”
 ‘Oh heaven..’
I sighed a relief, and raised my hands to grab her face, I smiled as I felt her fit perfectly into my hold. I leaned my forehead on hers as her other hand raised on my chest, resting them there.
 “Jake? It’s ok-“
 “I want you.. I need you. Please I know I’ve barely heard your voice and have seen you for the first time, but this feels so right- oomph!!”
And her lips caught me off guard as they locked onto mine. Her delicate arms wrapped around my neck and pulled me flush against her. I dipped my head to kiss her deeper as I lifted her off the ground and held her tightly. This was better than checking off anything on my bucket list, she completed me. Her soft lips touched mine so lovingly and softly, though I could feel the passion in it all. If I died like this… I’d die a winning man. A cute whimper fell from her lips as I pressed harder and squeezed her hips, not getting enough of feeling her on me. I had instantly grown addicted. We made out there at the bar, passionately and freely, feeling like we were the only ones on earth. She gently pulled my hair as her other hand held my cheek, I let out a low moan which gave her entrance to slip her tongue through my lips. Once she did that, it got a bit more intense and heated, but still very nice as we held one another. But soon nature called, asking us to split apart to take a good breather in. But we didn’t separate far, keeping our cheeks pressed on one another. I could feel her warm labored breaths hit my ear, and I heard her whisper,
 “Phoenix never asked me to come… I just wanted to find you.”
I awed lowly at her confession, and only held her tighter as I admitted,
“I thought I lost you.”
She hummed and pecked my temple,
“You had me the minute you helped me off the stool. Literally.”
I moved my head to look back into her eyes shocked at that fact. She smiled and nodded, while I leaned closer once again as I said before I kissed her,
 “So getting to you was a slow but blissful ride then.”
She laughed through the kiss, and feeling her smile through it too, only made me fall harder for her… damn having her now was a winner, but indeed a slow ride.
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shaunamilfman · 11 months
Text
Werewolf!Shauna drabble
summary: "Vet!reader is walking through the woods near your house one day when you meet a particularly large looking dog."
A/N: spent half this fic seeing how many times I could embarrass werewolf shauna lmao
You're walking through the woods near your house one day when you meet a particularly large looking dog. You eye it curiously as it has an oddly human look of weariness as it looks back at you. 
You squat down slowly while holding your hands out placatingly. You carefully reach a hand towards it while asking softly, "Will you let me pet you, gorgeous?" It tilts its head to the side in interest. 
You grin teasingly. "Yeah. You have such a pretty coat don't you? You must take such good care of it." You say, as if talking to a child. The dog puffs its chest out in pride and trots over to you. You smile in earnest as you immediately start rubbing behind its ear. 
You murmur praises as you gently pet it, taking the time to look it over. "Oh, you're a girl aren't you." You mutter distractedly as you check for a collar, missing the way her ears flatten in embarrassment. "Can't believe no one's put a collar on you. Do you want to come home with me, girl?" You ask. 
The dog looks down, unable to look you in the eyes. You hear the distant sounds of a wolf howling. You give her a concerned look as you say, "We should get you away from here. That wolf would eat a small thing like you right up." You've seem to have taken one liberty too many as she runs off toward the howling with her tail between her legs. 
… 
It's been a few weeks and you've yet to find the dog again, even after you really looked around. You really hope it didn't get eaten. 
It's not a big focus of yours currently, as you've had the creeping feeling that someone's been following you. You obviously can't prove it, but you could have sworn you saw brown hair whip around the corner of a building when you turned around on more than one occasion. 
You know you can't do anything about it, but it makes you unusually anxious as you start locking your animal clinic up. You were extremely proud of your practice, even if it wasn't in the most luxurious of locations; it's located just on the outside of town bordering the woods. 
You've already sent everyone home for the day and are just about to lock up as you hear a persistent scratching at the backdoor. You eye it wearily as you creep towards the door and peer through the peephole. You fling the door open looking dumbfounded: It's the dog!
She trots in slowly as she carries what looks to be a blonde wolf on her back. She stands in the middle of the room looking at you expectantly. You glance back in forth between them and decide just to accept it. Surely, it couldn't get any weirder. You think.  You kneel down to examine the wolf's bloody leg and realize that she got her leg caught in a trap. 
You manage to get the wolf up on the table, with the surprisingly helpful assistance of the dog. You disinfect and treat the wound while the dog watches you carefully. At some point the wolf wakes up and starts whining but the dog walks over and calms it. 
"There you go! Right as rain!" You say as you finish up, reaching a hand up to pet the blonde wolf gently. "Aren't you a gorgeous little thing." You compliment. The wolf preens at the compliment but flinches away at the sound of a low growl. You eye the dog curiously. They both take off and you slowly lock the door behind them. What the fuck. 
It may have been the first time it happened, but it certainly wasn't the last. This town seemed to have a real wolf problem, and for some reason they all turned up in various degrees of injury at your clinic after hours. You offer a sticker one day to a brown wolf that's much bigger than the others. The wolf looks extremely pleased as she bows her head so you can stick it on her forehead. She seems to show it off smugly to the other wolves as they leave. You shake your head in disbelief.
… 
You're closing up yet again when you hear a soft knock at the door. You eye the back door wearily, wondering if they've finally managed to learn how to knock. Your whole body relaxes when you realize it's coming from the front door. That would have been too much. You think. 
You open the front door to reveal a gorgeous brunette bleeding on your doorstep. You immediately look down at a hissing cat that's clearly done a number scratching up her arms. "Would you mind looking at my cat?" She asks softly, "I think he might be sick." You eye the obviously feral cat wearily before inviting her in. 
The two of you make conversation while you take a look at the cat. You announce to Shauna that he seems to be fine to her badly feigned relief. As you're walking her out she seems to gather the courage to ask you on a date. 
You watch her closely for a long moment as you consider. You're pretty sure she's the one that's been stalking you. You'd recognize that brunette hair anywhere, but as you get lost in her brown eyes you decide to risk it. As long as you didn't have absolute proof there was no harm, right? Right? 
… 
Your date goes surprisingly well once you get past the disgust of how rare she ordered her steak. You couldn't help but laugh at the irony of a vet dating a butcher, but you couldn’t deny how charming she was. 
After you've gone on a few dates with Shauna she practically moved in. You'd complain but it seems the old adage holds true. You asked her once who took care of her cat while she was staying with you all the time and she guiltily claimed he ran away. Sure. You thought. 
After you came home from work to see Shauna picking up one half of your couch with one hand while vacuuming under it with the other you decided to just get her a key. 
She always seems to be away for a few days near the end of the month, claiming it's for 'business'. You're not sure what on Earth a butcher would need to go on a business trip for, but you always managed to snag some of her flannels to wear while she's gone. Shauna, for her part, readily offers them to you. 
When you finally found out you avoided Shauna for a few days. Not because you were upset about it, but more because you were embarrassed. It seemed extremely obvious in retrospect. Shauna shows up at your house sheepishly, insisting that she really thought you knew already. 
… 
Shauna always puts herself between you and any perceived threat. It's cute at first, but she seems strangely territorial when she jumps in front of your neighbor's mean dog. You watch her curiously but she absolutely refuses to make eye contact with you. You laugh hysterically as she leads you away as she tries pathetically to justify her reaction. 
Shauna comes home a lot half covered in dirt with twigs in her hair. She's always had a real superpower for always showing up five minutes after you get home, which makes a lot more sense now that you know. She'll hold out her hand with whatever meat she brought from work today and watches you hungrily as you cook it. You made a joke once about how she looks like she fought it herself, but she puffs up in pride so much that you realize it must be true. 
She's always very energetic those days, immediately trying to pull you into the bedroom as soon as you're done eating. She'll run off to take a shower at your gentle reminder. If you're still dressed when she comes out she'll shake her hair out at you like a wet dog. You're really not sure why you find it so charming. 
… 
You keep finding small game on your porch. At first you'd sweep it off, but you started waiting until after Shauna left as she'd look weirdly offended one time when she'd witnessed it. Your eyes widen in realization as you turn to look at her. "Shauna." You say slowly. 
"I'm taking care of you." She defends. "Look how dull your teeth are. You couldn't hunt anything." She's blushing to her hairline, obviously embarrassed. You smile, strangely pleased. 
"Of course my big strong hunter would take care of me." You tease. She scoffs and walks back inside to the tune of your laughter.
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