#the true limits and capabilities of humanity. to feel and love and all there is to know

[tunapesto]

so when I die which I must do,

could it shine down here with you?

[elitadream]

Mario instinctively lifted a trembling arm before he even registered the embrace, powerless to resist the pull. And when Luigi tightened his hold, wordlessly inviting him to do the same, he found himself entirely unable to hold back any longer. It was then that the stupefying reality of it all finally hit Mario with full force, and he broke down crying as he gingerly engulfed Luigi in a tender hug.

-

There it is, folks. My last entry for the body swap concept I shared over the past few weeks. 🤲💝 This is a direct continuation of these two scenes that I wanted to explore through both illustration and text. I hope you've enjoyed this tangent! I will surely revisit it again at some point. ^-^

(Full scene below the cut 📝)

-oOo-

Mario stared, mouth agape, frozen in place.

He had been about to voice his surprise as he had looked up and spotted a second figure walking into view, but had fallen silent the second he had recognized who it was. Unable to finish his sentence. Unable to articulate a single word.

The man currently standing a short distance away from him appeared similarly struck, as if lost in a daze. His eyes were wide open and his stance unsteady, but his breathing was slow. Quiet. Calm, even. His hand slid from the rocky surface on which it was resting, and he shuffled his feet slightly as he stood a little straighter. A movement that Mario had seen a million times before and knew by heart. The detail was painful in its candid simplicity, the familiarity it emanated feeling both out of place and strangely grounding. The young man blinked, his shoulders dropping somewhat, and Mario noted that his expression wasn't one of horror or dismay.

It was one of solemn awe and sympathy.

Mario felt his jaw twitch and move feebly, but no sound came out. Distantly, he registered Princess Peach gently patting his neck in support, her touch warm and comforting. He could feel his eyes begin to sting as he swallowed, then resolutely tried again.

"L-Luigi?" He finally whispered, his voice wavering.

It didn't seem real.

Mario wasn't sure how long he had remained chained up in his cell, although the time he had spent imagining the worst scenarios imaginable had seemed to him like an eternity. The confinement and loneliness, he could handle. But no punishment or torture remotely equaled the threat that Bowser had dropped as he had turned to him, his human features distorted by an ugly and cruel sneer.

"If you do anything to try and get out of here, they're dead. That lovely Princess you're so enamored with? Dead. That miserable coward you call your brother? Also dead. I guarantee you I will kill them both, and I will make sure they thoroughly suffer to make you pay for it. Is that understood?"

Mario had already been heavily restrained at this point, faced with a squad of Bowser's best guards and Kamek hovering menacingly above them, wand in hand. But that didn't matter. He might as well have been alone with the tyrant, free and fully capable of defending himself; the dark promise would have halted him in his tracks all the same, paralyzing him with an identical wave of sickening dread.

He had only managed to give a single, haggard nod in response, and as soon as the malevolent king had departed with his troops, he had caved under the weight of his own despair. There, left alone to rot in the deepest dungeon of Bowser's fortress, he had spent many hours stagnating in emotional agony, overwhelmed by a crushing feeling of helpessness and guilt.

This was all his fault. He had fallen into his enemy's trap, and now his loved ones were in grave peril because of his foolishness. Worse yet, he couldn't protect or even warn them.

It was a nightmare come true, and the torment it had plagued him with ceaselessly had made it impossible for him to rest or think about anything else, exhausting him beyond his limits.

He was still reeling from the shock and astonishing surge of hope he had felt when the princess had entered his cell. To see her there, alive and well, reaching to offer him any form of reassurance she could despite his horrendous mistake and appearance had felt almost like an absurd dream in itself…

But to find Luigi there as well stunned Mario in a way that he couldn’t put into words even if he tried. To think of all that his little brother had braved for him - and still continued to brave, even now - was absolutely staggering.

Mario was vaguely aware of the sound of Peach's voice as she offered him a few hushed words of encouragement, but he could barely hear her. His mind felt as though it was wrapped in a thick layer of wool, fuzzy and packed. The prickling sensation at the corner of his eyes intensified, making his vision blurry and unfocused.

Luigi took a tentative step forward, then another. He was being cautious, his movements measured and small. Something in his demeanor told Mario that he wasn't doing this out of unease, or to mentally steel himself, but for another reason entirely. He was observing him attentively, trying to gauge his reaction, and it was suddenly clear that Luigi was being careful for his sake instead of his own.

The pressure at the back of Mario's throat became all at once suffocating, and he made a choked noise as he tried to press himself further against the wall he had backed into, hiding his beastly face in his hands.

"Per favore… Non avvicinarti di più", he whimpered brokenly, vainly trying to conceal himself from view.

He didn't understand how Luigi could remotely find it in himself to look at him, and less even approach him. His little brother had always been frightened of fierce creatures. Mario recalled many nights where he had held Luigi close when they were young, assuring him that no monster would ever come near him. What good could he accomplish now? In a cruel twist of fate, he was stuck as the one thing he had vowed to protect Luigi from, and there was nothing he could do to change his predicament.

He couldn’t handle the mere thought of his brother staring at him with terror in his eyes. He just couldn't. It would be too much for him to bear.

"N-non ti v-voglio spaventare", he stuttered weakly, amidst the ragged breaths shaking his entire form.

There was no audible response to his plea, and for a few harrowing seconds, Mario believed he was alone once more. Wondering, despite himself, whether he had wished so dearly to see Luigi and Peach again that he briefly managed to persuade himself that they were indeed there with him. But then, he heard a faint sigh, and was deeply startled when two very small hands took hold of his own, gently prying them away. The contact was meek but insistent, and Mario found that he didn't have the resolve nor the willpower to fight it. Gradually, his clawed paws were withdrawn from his face as he heaved and shuddered, his eyes still shut tight in mortifcation.

He couldn’t move, could hardly even breathe. He was petrified.

"Ciò non potrebbe mai accadere…"

With a start, Mario gasped and looked down to see Luigi fondly shaking his head. He was smiling, albeit in a pained and wobbly manner, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. His gloved fingers went to cup the underside of his jaw, grazing the scaly area in a gesture completely devoid of hesitation, and with seldom seen certainty, he serenely held his gaze.

"…caro fratellone," he added in a fragile murmur, before leaning forward and past his snout.

Mario instinctively lifted a trembling arm before he even registered the embrace, powerless to resist the pull. And when Luigi tightened his hold, worldlessly inviting him to do the same, he found himself entirely unable to hold back any longer. It was then that the stupefying reality of it all finally hit Mario with full force, and he broke down crying as he gingerly engulfed Luigi in a tender hug.

"Sei qui! Sei davvero qui!" He repeated like a mantra, sobbing profusely.

"Io sono qui," Luigi returned, his kind voice muffled against his neck. "Non vado da nessuna parte."

Never had Luigi been the one to comfort a scared and distraught Mario before, but in this exact moment, nothing felt more right. They both needed this, they knew, and for more reasons than one.

Standing respectfully off to the side, Peach looked on as Luigi whispered something else in Italian, causing both brothers to huff in incredulous mirth. She watched as Mario ever so gently angled his head downwards, ruffling Luigi’s hair with his cheek as he lightly stroked his back. And as she did, it occurred to her with stark clarity that they were really - and truly - two halves of a whole. Separating them seemed as awful and unnatural a thought as a world existing without either night or day. It was simply inconceivable.

Walking out from the shadowed spot where he had quietly observed the whole exchange, Junior wandered closer and stopped a few timid steps away from the princess, his gaze riveted on his feet.

"I understand, now," he mumbled dejectedly.

Peach turned to the young prince, giving him a soft and curious look. Before she could inquire about his statement, he feebly kicked at the dust and joined his hands behind his back, purposely averting his eyes still.

"I understand why this was so important to him," he elaborated, designating Luigi with a slight jerk of his chin. "Why he did all of that, and why he wouldn't back down. I didn't know they were so…"

He trailed off as he looked at the bros, a glimmer of wistfulness and empathy shimmering in his eyes.

"Inseparable?" Peach supplied for him, knowingly.

He nodded, his outwardly nonchalant demeanor however made less than convincing by his troubled frown.

"Do you… Do you think there's a chance Mario will still want to be my friend?" He eventually asked, his voice plaintive and small.

Peach blinked at him in mild shock, and with a compassionate smile, she bent down to his level.

"You have reunited him with his brother," she reminded him, emphasizing the sheer significance of that fact through her tone. When he tried dismissing it with a rueful shrug, she laid a hand on his shoulder and waited for him to look at her. "You did a wonderful thing, and we're all very grateful for it. Mario loves you very much no matter what. He'll want to thank you himself, no doubt."

Though he tried not to let it show, Junior was visibly elated and relieved by her response. He rocked on his heels with a boyish grin, looking proud and hopeful for the first time that day, and Peach found that his enthusiasm was contagious. With a pleased hum, she smoothed out her dress and motioned for him to follow her just as Mario and Luigi finally parted.

They didn't know how they would solve this issue, and if they were all honest with themselves, they were also very apprehensive about what was yet to come. But something had changed. They no longer felt defeated, lost or isolated. Where there had previously been nothing but fear and sadness, there was now love and support. A newfound assurance and sense of security. A powerful warmth that helped soothe the pain.

They were all together again, and this already felt like a victory in itself.

-oOo-

[thesiltverses]

Hello! I found the silt verses about three weeks ago and have listened to it several times since. I have a few things to say.

I absolutely adore that episode about the national grid workers. I think it’s my favorite episode of any podcast I’ve ever listened to. My favorite part of that first episode Paige is in is how she justifies not standing up for Vaughn, that cognitive dissonance that you wrote so well. This episode gives me what I wanted from that episode, the workers all banding together to stop the wasteful sacrifice of one of them. The actor who played the foreman did an incredible job as well. I think that having him discuss which of his workers he would sacrifice was such a significant moment, despite how brief it is. It cuts right to the big question that I took away from the podcast which is, “How much is someone willing to sacrifice in order to maintain their comfort?” And the utter disrespect of Glodditch (apologies for the spelling) refusing to cancel even the radio but asking grid workers to kill themselves for 200kw/h! Top tier episode.

I grew up in the south and went to college in Appalachia. I saw the disparity in technology and “advancement” if that makes sense that poverty brings, and the way you set up the world invokes that feeling in me again. You are an amazing world builder and storyteller.

I really enjoyed the cameos - I’m a big fan of malevolent/devisor, Old gods of Appalachia, and all of Jonny sims work, so hearing familiar voices was an absolute delight. Harlan Guthrie as an acolyte of the snuff gods might have been a bit too on the nose with some of the things that man writes, though… /pos

I’m transmasculine, and something that I really appreciate is how you manage to make a trans man do some objectively awful things, but still manage to make him a complex, full character that I was rooting for very frequently. Brother Faulkner is so, so important to me as a character. Paula Vogel has a play called “Indecent,” which is about the true story of a troupe of I believe German Jewish actors between the years of 1910ish and 1940s putting on a show called “God of Vengeance” by Sholem Asch, also a Jewish man. “God of Vengeance” has queer themes and received a lot of criticism from the Jewish community for showing Jewish folks in a “bad” light at a time when there was already so much hatred for Jewish people. Brother Faulkner being as complex and, in my opinion, malicious and cutthroat as he is at a time when trans people face so much bigotry, especially legislatively in the United States, brings this conversation about “God of Vengeance” up again for me. I also love how normalized non-binary people are in this world, without question. “Sibling this or that,” the hunter, adjudicator Shrew - big thanks from me for all of this.

All of this to say, I love this podcast. Can you talk more about the rhetorical gods? Is Babble one? What makes them one if they are, or why aren’t they? I’m fascinated by them. Can you talk more about the propaganda gods too?

Thank you so much for the thoughtful and kind words!

I'll check out Indecent, it sounds really interesting and I'm very glad to hear Faulkner works for you as a character. I think the topic of how to include and write queer characters who are capable of terrible things and thoughts (because, after all, these characters are human beings and not tutelary exemplars), within the context of both a rising movement of transphobia right now and centuries-old scapegoating / pathologising portrayals more generally, is a really knotty but a really important one, and I always want to make sure I'm approaching it with care and due responsibility as well as a sense of humility around the limitations of what, as a cis writer, I can actually achieve.

To that end, I don't want to ever take the audience response for granted, but I'm always really grateful to hear that the portrayal is working for a listener!

Propaganda gods: gods whose prayer-marks or ritual verses are fed directly to the enemy, enforcing destructive or sabotaging changes to reality (so rather than sending a destructive saint or angel to rampage over the foe, you might drop pamphlets or send radio messages to the enemy to 'convert' them).

Rhetorical gods: gods whose followers possess reality-warping powers of language itself (which is why 'rhetorical god' is a polite way of saying 'liar's god'). In other words, the paranoia around them comes partly down to the fact that a disciple like Val may appear to be a limitless shaper of new forms, rather than shaped into a limited form of their own, as a result of their worship.

[midnightsunnyday]

Thinking a bit about Mammon and what we know of him canonically, his behavior, values, principles, and conduct, and how they seem entirely different from what we know of his fanon interpretation.

Canon Mammon is…well, let’s just call a spade a spade, he’s a clown. The certified Butt-Monkey of the brothers, if something bad is going to happen, nine times out of ten, it’s going to happen to him. Dude is a truffle pig for trouble and for the most part, loves to sniff it out and roll in it.

Have the fans explain it, and Mammon is a saint who's never done anything wrong in his life ever, yet story-wise, Mammon’s downfalls and shortcomings are usually due to his own dubious inclinations, though to be fair, are a consequence of him being the literal physical manifestation of one of humanity’s sins: greed. We see this through his gambling habits, his tendency to engage in shady deals or practices, his lying, and his cheating, but what really gains him the ire of most of his siblings and others is his tendency to steal and sell any and everything he assumes may bring him a profit, regardless if the item is sentimental or not.

Needless to say, Mammon isn’t the most respected of his brothers, and they remind him of it every chance they get, specifically with the words “scumbag,” ‘moron,” “idiot,” “money-obsessed moron,” etc. Mammon even suffers for his actions physically, with Lucifer finding little issue in stringing him up and leaving him there to rot for a while.

There’s also the fact that in the first season of the OG game, like most of the brothers, Mammon is kind of an asshole. Your typical Tsundere archetype, his personality is initially brash and not too keen on learning of his forced role as a human attendant, constantly insulting the MC while bemoaning his position all the while, a position he almost fails in upholding more than once when the MC’s life is threatened.

Yet because this is an otome game, Mammon eventually begins to have feelings for the MC as soon as the fourth lesson, and that whole being your “first” thing holds a lot of weight to Mammon, so much so that he’ll bring it up repeatedly. He becomes a bit more clingy, vying for the MC’s attention, to the point where personal space is but a mere myth to this man.

For you see, beyond his salty attitude is a man with a huge heart. Canon Mammon is competent and capable of showing a surprising amount of wisdom, intelligence, strength, and kindness when he puts his mind to it (the man admits himself to being sensitive, after all).

Despite his shortcomings, there’s a reason Lucifer entrusted Mammon with the MC, as out of all of his siblings, he is the only character capable of keeping his “bloodlust” in check. And despite his flakiness at times, Lucifer relies heavily on Mammon to complete certain tasks, to the point where he’s accused of showing favoritism towards the secondborn. Speaking of which, that second-born title also includes his power level, having the ability to clearly fight and defend himself, yet choosing to either run or hide from altercations, if possible. It’s rare for him to get angry or fight back, which is why it’s so scary when he does.

More importantly, Mammon is completely and utterly in love with the MC. This is true for all the brothers, but Mammon is the most consistent, a constant in his character that never changes and is the main drive to his appeal imo. Unlike the other brothers, who seem to have interests and relationships outside of the MC, Mammon’s focus is single-targeted, and it’s one of the many reasons why he’s the most popular character in the game. There are no limitations to his affections. No scary or overly complicated parts to his character. We are his “first,” and that’s a comfortable place to be because regardless of what we do or how we look, Mammon isn’t one to give up and will literally fight, yell, and cry his way into your heart, whether you choose someone else or not.

However, you wouldn’t be able to tell this with Fanon Mammon, a soggy wad of therapy session tissues. He is an absolutely miserable wreck of a man. A traumatized, suicidal-inclined, helpless dude in need of a serious hug. A prone character to hurt/comfort fics, he's the trauma dumpster for the fans who like to project, which would be fine if it weren’t for the fact that these traits are sometimes treated as actual aspects of Mammon’s canon character. Fanon Mammon is essentially boiled down to his most pathetic traits, woobifying him. In fics where the brothers are present, such as Lucifer and Asmodeus, expect them to be written OOC to make Mammon appear even worse. In essense, Fanon Mammon not only has his complexity completely taken away, but takes away the complexity of everyone else around him in the process.

I'm not certain why this happens to Mammon more than other characters. Maybe because of his "kick the dog" status in canon, which causes people to sympathize with him more. And if you're someone who can relate to a lot of Mammon’s shortcomings, then that probably adds to his "woobie" nature.

And this isn't to say you can never go beyond canon and write Mammon any other way, yet it's like I've stated before, there's your headcanon and there's canon. You can think what you want, write what you want, yet something doesn't become a fact just because you want it to be/are emotional about it. And you also don't get the right to attack people for it.

Anyway, these are just things I've noticed about his fanon vs canon that I personally don't like, though opinions are always appreciated.

[uneducated-author]

I love how Bungou Stray Dogs writes Geniuses.

Dazai and Dostoyevsky are very obvious foils, but BSD never lets that feel lazy, because the two still have distinct ideologies and strategies. The line is less blurred with the two. Both are willing to kill, to manipulate and to utilise any means necessary to achieve their goals. In the script distinguish themselves majorly in one particular way, which is their understanding of God (or at least fate) and their perspective of humanity. Fyodor believes fate rewards perfection and harmony while Dazai posits that the works of destiny are happenstance and absurdity. Fyodor thinks he's controlling the situation while Dazai says the ones making the World move are the people trapped in contingency. They both agree that humans are sinful and foolish. But to Fyodor that makes them undeserving and boring, while Dazai says that their inherent flaws make them great. They aren't different in an intellectual level, only an ideological one.

Then compare than to Ranpo, noted as the strongest man in the agency. A kind of walking deus ex machina with Ultra Deduction, but a really complex character. We saw him as a strategist in Cannibalism, except that he largely was supporting Kunikida, but now he's essentially running all of the ADA operations. He fails to account for all the contingencies that Dostoyevsky would implement, but arguably knows the limitations and capabilities of the ADA better than even Dazai (think of that scene where they're planning to take down the moby dick).

I like how Ranpo and Dazai are portrayed in their respective arcs right now. Ranpo's strategies are explained clearly to the audience, with flashbacks to him explaining their route of action occurring as the plot unfolds, and clear agendas and techniques used in real time. In contrast, Dazai's plans are kept secret even from the reader, so we are left oblivious to his true agenda and plan.

Then compare that to Mori, who is a very grounded genius. He's smart enough to calculate that Fukuchi is Kamui, which before only Ranpo had deduced, and has been running the port mafia, even maintaining it during intense internal turmoil from when different factions were fighting against him. In the dark era we even see him out manipulate Dazai, with him being the one to smuggle Mimic into Yokohama and leak the location of the orphans without Dazai knowing. But he doesn't have aspirations beyond keeping Yokohama safe, so most of his schemes are directly for the city or for the Port Mafia. He utilises peoples access to information, and affects their circumstances to influence their actions. He has a great understanding of how individuals will both act and react, and how to manipulate both.

There are multiple 'genius' characters, but they all have distinct skill sets and ideologies, and I love seeing how the narrative handles each if them.

[lovemyavatar]

May I request a Jake Sully x reader where she’s also involved in the Avatar program somehow? And Jake is convinced she’d like him better as an avatar when really, she just likes him period!! I feel like human Jake doesn’t get enough love round these parts (the avatar fandom) lol

this is my first ever full length Jake fic! I loved this idea and hope you enjoy :)

All of You

Human/Avatar!Jake Sully x Human/Avatar!Reader

Warnings: slight angst but mostly fluff, some smooching

“That was so cool!”

You practically throw yourself from your link unit, shoving the door open and tumbling out hastily. A wide grin splits your face as the unit beside yours pops open, revealing a chuckling Jake who merely shakes his head in amusement.

“Seriously, did you see that shot I landed?” You bounce on your toes excitedly, adrenaline coursing through your veins.

Your body hasn't caught up yet, doesn't realize you're no longer surrounded by dense forest, riding pa'li (direhorses) and firing arrows from handmade bows. Your heart thrums wildly between your ribs, pride swelling within your chest as you replay the day's events.

Nearly every day for the last several months has been dedicated to learning the ways of the Omatikaya clan. You’ve done things that so recently felt impossible, accomplished feats beyond your wildest dreams. It’s overtaken your life, blurred the lines between realities. At this point, you feel more like yourself when you’re in the Avatar, than when you’re just you.

It’s awe-inspiring and terrifying all at once. Getting lost in the breathtaking terrain of Pandora is easier than you anticipated. Hours pass within the blink of an eye when you're exploring the moon, almost like the whole thing is nothing but a fantasy.

When you're back at the lab, the world out there feels too good to be true. Whispers of self-doubt flood the back of your mind, convincing you that there's someone better, someone more worthy of experiencing such beauty. But the second your Avatar's eyes open, and you begin another day of exploration, everything feels right again.

Throughout the turbulent ebbs and flows of the program, the only constant, the single force keeping you sane, has been Jake.

You catch the way his eyes leave you, flicking downward before settling on his withered legs. A rough sigh falls from his lips, shoulders sagging as if, though only for a moment, he forgot his own limitations. Instinctively, you take a small step forward, arms outstretched.

You know he’s more than capable, know how he feels about people helping him, but it’s simply a reaction to the forlorn expression etched into his face. It has nothing to do with his ability, and everything to do with the fact that you can’t stand to see him upset.

One of his palms blocks your path, narrowed eyes cutting toward you harshly.

“I got it.” The words are clipped as he forces them through a tightly clenched jaw.

You’re quick to move back, spine rigid as remorse floods your chest. The last thing you want to do is make the transition harder for him, or give the impression that you doubt his ability. His attention gradually falls back to his legs, fingers griping the rough material of his jeans.

You nod curtly before briskly walking away, stomach twisting with unease. His gaze snaps toward your retreating back, lips pursing to contain a sigh of disappointment.

He's an idiot. A complete dufus because he can't fight the urge, the overwhelming knee-jerk reaction to push you away when he's like this. It's a challenge he never considered having to face, wrestling with another version of himself that's everything he's ever wanted.

Out there, in the forest, his body excels at things he's long resigned himself to never doing again. He can run, leap, climb like the adventurous child trapped within him has always begged to do.

But here? Here he’s just…human.

For the entirety of his adult life, he's struggled to make friends. The problem was only exacerbated after his accident, when he became closed off and callous to the world outside his own struggle.

It's been glaringly obvious from the beginning that he's nothing like the other Avatar program participants. He never wanted to be here. Not really. But what did he have to lose? His twin was already gone, legs rendered useless, and his life was going nowhere fast.

But then there was you. You, who—for reasons unfathomable to Jake—accepted him right away. No questions asked. From day one, the two of you flocked together like long lost buddies who hadn’t seen each other in years.

As the days tick by, your unlikely friendship has blossomed into full-blown co-dependency. Early on, the two of you requested a shared desk, opting to complete debriefings together more often than not. Your supervisors don't usually mind, since your structured nature reigns in Jake's tendency to wander.

You're glued to each other's sides almost every waking hour, whether in the Avatars or not. It just comes naturally, finding comfort in the solid presence of one another, especially when dropped in the unfamiliar environment of Pandora.

The clan has no qualms about your desire to stay together, and readily agreed to teach you their ways as a pair. It's enriched the experience, and led to both of your success in the program. Jake's heart flutters, a warmth blooming in his chest at the mere memory of your days spent together under the Pandoran sun.

But with every shared smile or lingering glance comes a wave of confusion at the inevitable switch in his demeanor once he re-enters his human body. You're accustomed to it by now, have come to expect it, but that doesn't lessen the sting of his dismissal.

He can't help the way he curls in on himself, can't even entertain the idea that you may adore him just as fiercely in this form. It makes him cold, abrasive despite the way his heart clenches every time your face pinches with hurt.

Stillness has settled over the lab, the rhythmic droll of typing the only interruption in the otherwise quiet workspace.

Your fingers pause over the keyboard in front of you, gaze wavering from the computer monitor for a brief moment. Just long enough to catch the beginning of a cheeky grin pointed in your direction. You quickly divert your eyes once again, using every ounce of self-control to ignore the distraction only inches away.

Just as your lips part to continue the day's video log, something hard smacks against the back of your hand. You freeze, glancing down to spot a wadded up piece of paper laying on your desk.

“Can I help you?” You lean to the side, keeping your voice low as to not disturb those working diligently on either side of your desk.

“I’m bored.” Jake whispers in return, leaning forward to rest his chin on his crossed arms.

Your stomach flips when he looks up at you, rounded eyes blinking innocently. His lips tug into a small, hopeful smile. A sigh fills the few feet between your side of the desk and his.

“That's because you're not working.” Your gaze flicks over the room before you dip forward to meet him halfway.

“Let’s get outta here.” His eyes dance with mischief, while yours pop wide at the suggestion.

“Jake…” His name is nothing more than a weak protest, because truthfully, you would love to avoid the remaining tasks piling up in your inbox.

Even so, using the Avatars outside of approved hours is strictly forbidden. He knows this, of course, but he's been antsy since returning that morning. He's losing his mind a bit, just sitting here reminiscing about all the ways his body is so much more out there.

A twinge of regret still weighs heavily in his chest from the way he snapped at you. He wants things to feel normal again. A piece of his soul aches to be back in the dream-like world of Pandora with you, where no real life bullshit can get in the way.

“I won’t tell if you don't.” His lips stretch into that dazzling, heart-stopping grin, and you're done for.

Sometimes, you can't help but wonder if he's aware of the effect he has on you. The way even a simple glance lights you up, makes your stomach flip as warmth blankets your skin.

He can't, can he? Otherwise he wouldn't be so hot and cold. Wouldn't make you think there could be something to the tension between you when you're in the Avatars, only to pull back the second you return to the lab.

Right?

A giggle bubbles in your chest, gaze flicking over your shoulder as a light touch caresses the tuft of hair at the base of your tail.

“Come on, I thought you were faster than that!”

The sore muscles of your legs protest as you pivot suddenly, hurriedly climbing the nearest tree for safety. You only make it a few feet before strong arms wrap around your middle, effortlessly peeling your weak grip from the rough bark.

Another laugh echoes through the quiet forest as Jake spins you around, pressing your back against the tree. Your chest heaves from the chase, ragged breath fanning his face as he crowds you. One of his hands rests above your head, the other firmly cupping your hip.

The innocent touch sets you ablaze, makes something warm pool in your lower belly. His lips pull into a lopsided grin, golden eyes searing a hole straight through you.

“Gotcha.” His heated gaze flickers over your face, lingering on your lips for just a moment too long before he forces it back to your eyes. “Again.”

“Alright, this time, you run.” Your palm meets his chest, with every intention of pushing him away, but the second his warmth seeps into you, you're frozen in place.

Your fingers twitch against his skin, eyelids growing heavy as you glance over the swell of muscle beneath your hand. He takes a slow breath in, terrified that you can feel the way his heart pounds between his ribs.

“I don't think that'd be very fair.” He rasps lowly, not trusting himself to speak any louder.

Your eyes raise slowly to meet his, breath hitching at the sweltering desire already locked firmly on you. His free hand leaves its resting place above your head, tentatively dropping until his fingers curl around the side of your neck. A shiver rolls down your spine when his tail gingerly wraps around your thigh, bringing you even closer.

You lean into the touch, eyes fluttering as your lips part in anticipation. His thumb hooks beneath your jaw, gently tilting your face upward as he slowly leans in.

Your stomach dips, heart racing when his nose brushes yours, dragging along your skin for several long moments. Ragged breath mingles as both of you simply enjoy the newfound proximity. Your eyes close, mouth bracing for impact, until a sudden realization strikes you.

“Wait!” Your hand pushes against his chest, eyes popping wide as anxiety grips you.

Jake rears back, spine instantly rigid at the change of pace. He blinks down at you, utterly confused, searching your face for a sign that he did something wrong.

“We should—um...we should get back.” Your voice wobbles slightly with the declaration, chest tightening at the sight of him deflating before you.

Dread fills him, regret nearly splitting him in two as his heart clatters into his stomach. His mind races, wondering how he could've possibly misinterpreted the signals you were so clearly giving him. His hands and tail leave you, a dumbfounded nod the only response he's capable of at the moment.

You're quick to scurry away, chin tucked into your chest, tail lowered between your legs as you make a hasty exit. All he can do is stand there, watching you disappear through thick foliage, unsure what just happened. Fear prickles against his skin, panicked thoughts of your friendship being ruined plaguing him the entire journey back.

Much like that morning, you rush from the link pod the moment your consciousness reenters your body. Your feet hit the ground before Jake's pod is even open, but it doesn't stop you from crossing the small distance quickly. You wait with baited breath for him to emerge, heart threatening to give out at any moment.

He's surprised to see you waiting for him, avoids your eager gaze as his stomach turns at the memory of his earlier humiliation. He wants nothing more than to wheel his sorry ass to bed, and stay there for several days.

“Well...I’ll see you tomorrow.” He mumbles when he's safely in his chair, unable to leave you with nothing, though his eyes remain locked on the floor.

“Jake.” His traitorous arms stop the instant you call out to him, his already battered heart leaping hopefully.

You round his hunched form quickly, leaning down in an effort to catch his eyes, He still won't look at you, glancing at anything and everything to avoid the source of his turmoil.

“There's just one thing...”

Your fingertips hook under his chin, forcing his face toward you. Without allowing time for doubt, you duck down, capturing his lips with yours. His eyes pop open, brows raising in shock. He's only stunned for a split second before his hands leave the wheels of his chair, instead cupping both sides of your face tenderly.

Your mouths move together feverishly, months of pent up desire releasing through the passionate kiss. He groans into you, the low rumble landing firmly between your legs. His tongue prods against the seam of your lips, quickly taking control of the situation as his large hands pull you in.

Suddenly, he leans back, leaving just enough space between you to catch his breath.

“Trust me, I’m enjoying every second of this, but I thought…” His nose brushes along yours, eyes fluttering open to search yours.

Warmth blankets your cheeks, a coy smile pulling at your lips as you gaze down at him with every ounce of adoration you've been containing since the day you met.

“I didn’t want our first kiss to be in the Avatars.” Your murmur quietly, hands falling to his wrists, fingers curling around the steady hold on your face. “I want you, Jake Sully. The blue guy is just a bonus.”

A huge, boyish grin splits his face, matching your expression. Your admission washes over him, a pleasurable shiver rolling down his spine. Within seconds you're thrown off balance, a surprised yelp leaving you as he sweeps your feet from the floor, easily settling you onto his lap.

Your giggle is swallowed as his lips claim yours again. One of his hands leaves you, wheeling you toward his quarters blindly as he all but devours you, pure joy igniting in his chest.

@fanboyluvr @minjix @daeneeryss @aonungsmate @glimmering-darling-dolly

[hbyrde36]

Honey, You're Familiar

Written for the @strangerthingswritersguild Hozier Project

Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson

WC limit: 3000 | Song prompt: From Eden by Hozier

Rating: G | WC: 2998 | also on ao3

Steve and Eddie had been best friends since The Beginning. 

From the moment angels were blinked into existence, in a flurry of wide powerful wings and otherworldly beauty, they were inseparable, happy, right up until God made something new. 

Humans.

Curious creatures with souls and hearts capable of a full spectrum of emotions, given the one thing angels had been denied. 

Free will. 

Eddie hated them. Part of their job as angels was to watch over these new creations, but the more they watched, the more withdrawn Eddie became. 

He claimed God favored them, these beings who hardly knew of divine existence and whose lifespans were so short they barely mattered in the grand scheme of things. Steve disagreed, arguing that God didn’t play favorites, and surely, even if They did, the angels who’d been gifted with power and immortality were the preferred children. 

They debated about it– a lot, until friendly arguments turned into shouting matches. 

Was this anger?

This unpleasant thing that served no purpose except to make Eddie fly away from him in a huff. Was it sorrow that made his friend’s eyes shimmer, his lips turn down in that awful way? 

Eddie was changing, and Steve didn’t know what to do. He much preferred the days when they could laugh and smile together. It always left him feeling warm inside.

“You envy them.” Steve accused one day when Eddie was especially prickly. “Why? Is it not enough to be as you are and live here in Heaven with God? With me?”

“No! It’s not enough!” 

Eddie’s hands wound into his own hair and pulled, as if he’d tear it out from the root. “Why do they get the freedom to form such relationships? Why do they get to have it, and I don’t?!”

Steve tilted his head, perplexed. “To have what?”

“Love!”

“But, you do.” Steve said, still not understanding. “God loves us, and we love Them.”

Eddie sighed mournfully, all the fight draining out of him at once. “It’s not their love I ache for, Steve.”

It was no surprise when Eddie sided with Lucifer in the war and consequently fell from Heaven. Steve was there when it happened, forced to bear witness to the first and greatest loss he’d ever known. 

He was… sad, when Eddie was gone. 

Steve tried to pretend otherwise, but whenever he was alone and he thought of how he would never see his friend again, his eyes leaked and he would feel a terrible pain in his chest. 

Was he broken? 

He hadn’t thought angels were capable of such sentiments, but that couldn’t be true. Eddie’d had these things, feelings. They were what led him on his doomed path.

It was possible, it just wasn’t allowed.

He did his best to go on as before. It was difficult, nearly impossible sometimes, but it all became easier when a new flock of angels was made to replace their numbers, and Robin came barreling into his life. 

Part of him wanted to resist, to keep the space next to him forever empty, preserving the memory of who’d been there before, but he’d been alone for so long. 

Robin grew on him, and they quickly became close. While she could never replace Eddie, their friendship went a long way in filling the hole losing him had left behind. 

They complimented each other well. Where Steve was quiet and contemplative these days, Robin talked almost constantly. Not one to sit in silence, she always preferred to fill it. 

Just like Eddie. 

They were quite alike actually, Eddie and Robin. Steve couldn't help thinking that if they’d ever met they would’ve become fast friends, or killed one another. 

Things were ok for a while, Steve managed, until he was sent to Earth for the first time. He begged Robin to come along, nervous to walk amongst the humans when he’d only ever watched from afar, but she wasn’t allowed. 

Guardian angel for a day. An easy job, mostly watching and waiting, ensuring his charge remained safe. In all likelihood, he wouldn’t even be needed. 

The human in question was a kind older man, who ran a small coffee counter in a park, in a city Steve couldn't remember the name of. He ordered a drink and took a seat, doing his best to go unnoticed.

He observed much over the course of the day. Joyous reunions and somber goodbyes. First kisses and last kisses, and not one but two chance meetings where sparks flew. It was a magical thing to see someone find their soulmate. 

Steve returned to Heaven with a heavy heart. 

It'd been a very long time since their last conversation, but he could still hear Eddie’s voice… how resigned it had sounded, how devastated, when he’d looked at him and said “It’s not their love I ache for.” 

Finally, he got it. Eddie had loved him. 

Steve loved Eddie too, though he hadn’t realized it back then, so caught up in what they were supposed to be. He’d witnessed it up close now, love. Recognized it and the power it held, even as it made the wielder feel powerless. 

It was agony. 

Unable to hold it in anymore, he told Robin. 

It was probably the most words he’d ever said to her at once. He didn’t mention Eddie’s name, or admit whether the object of his desire was angel or otherwise. He didn’t want to rebel, but he couldn’t continue on as if nothing had changed. Couldn’t live the lie anymore. He was supposed to love only God, and it simply wasn’t true. 

Robin said he should talk to God, convinced that They had grown softer since the fall. Steve wasn’t so sure about that but he trusted her, and had little choice.

Thankfully, she’d been right. God was understanding, in Their way, and not wishing to see Steve so unhappy decided to gift him– a chance.   

He didn’t know what it meant, and that was as ominous as it was thrilling. It had felt a little too easy, in the end. All he knew was he was bound for earth, and as he prepared for the journey he could only wonder what the catch would be.

Steve woke up feeling like he’d been having the strangest dream. He couldn't recall the details apart from a beautiful boy’s face framed in soft dark curls, but wasn’t that always the way? 

He hopped out of bed with a spring in his step. It was a big day, the grand opening of his and Robin’s new coffee shop and he couldn't wait to greet their first customers.

Eddie cut ties with Lucifer shortly after the fall, uninterested in trading one leader demanding blind faith and allegiance for another. 

He was still a demon, technically, as were all who fell, but although he hated humans, he had no desire to harm them. 

He wasn’t evil, he was angry. 

At them, at God, even Steve, but mostly at himself. 

He’d let his feelings overtake his sense, and in his effort to fight for more he’d somehow wound up with less, only managing to get himself banished– sent as far away from the one he loved as it was possible to be. 

Eddie didn’t spend much time on Earth, still too bitter. He wasn’t exactly welcome in Hell either, but over the years had found his fair share of quiet corners to inhabit. 

He kept in touch with some others who’d also refused to follow Lucifer as he made the transition from fallen angel to Devil. Gareth, Jeff, and Grant. They became friends, of a sort. Kept an eye on eachother, gave warnings of trouble on the horizon, and a heads up about other interesting goings-on.

Which was how Eddie found out about the first time Steve set foot on earth. 

He’d gotten rip-roaring drunk once, on a rare night where all the boys were together in one place, and spilled his guts about Steve.They teased him a little, but only in good fun. They’d had their own motivations for taking up the cause and agreed love was as good a reason as any.

When Gareth came by to say an angel had been spotted in Central Park who bared a striking resemblance to his Steve, Eddie panicked. He’d been existing as if he’d never see the angel again, because he’d honestly thought he wouldn’t, and spent many long years pushing it all down, pretending he didn’t care anymore because it was the only way he could function.

Suddenly it all came rushing back to the surface, his heart becoming a gaping wound, open to the world all over again. 

He wanted to go to him, of course he did, but it’d been eons since they last spoke. Would Steve want to see him? Would he care? Even if he did, what would it matter? 

It would change nothing.

Deciding it would be more painful to see him now and lose him all over again than to never see him at all, Eddie buried his head in the sand. By the time it hit him that regardless of the pain he’d regret not going forever, it was too late. Steve was gone, nothing but an empty cup of coffee on a table to prove he’d been there at all. 

When fate conspired only days later to give Eddie a second chance, he knew he couldn’t waste it.

He’d gotten an address from Jeff and had to huff a laugh when he spotted the place. A cute little indie coffee shop. Was Steve the fucking coffee fairy now or something?

The front of the cafe was a wall of windows, and Eddie’s heart skipped a beat as he spotted Steve through the glass. He froze with his hand on the door, unsure if he was ready to face whatever was about to happen. 

Steve stood behind the counter next to a girl with a mischievous smile, laughing raucously at something she’d said. His eyes shone bright, and he was as beautiful as Eddie remembered– though he did miss the way his wings had framed his body. A pity angels weren't allowed to use them down here. 

Just when Eddie was building his resolve to finally go inside, Steve turned and their eyes met. The angel’s smile fell, mouth twisting into a curious expression, a wrinkle forming between his brows. 

He’d been prepared for a number of reactions, for Steve to be happy to see him, or angry and hating him, but he was wholly unprepared for Steve to look at him like that– as if he didn’t know him at all.

Eddie fled.

He didn’t run far, taking refuge in an alleyway across from the shop, well-versed in hiding in the shadows by now. 

He watched for days, unable to leave while Steve was near, but just as unable to approach him again.

In the evenings he would follow Steve home, never knowing where the girl went. Robin, as her name tag said. One second she'd be there and the next, poof, but Steve always walked to a small apartment where he’d spend the night hours alone before leaving again early the next morning.

What was he doing?

Who was his charge? 

Eddie had assumed it was Robin but the more he observed the more convinced he became that she was an angel too. 

None of it made sense. 

It all came to a head one night when he was lurking in his spot waiting for Steve to walk by, and found himself getting bodily thrown into a brick wall. A figure stepped into him, her small hand strong and firm around his throat, skin glowing ever-so-slightly with heavenly power.

Eddie raised his hands in the universal gesture for, I come in peace, and finally Robin let him go.

“What do you want, Demon?”

“I prefer Eddie, actually.”

She smirked, raising a single eyebrow. “Eddie the demon? What, you didn't want to come up with some fancy new name like all your buddies?”

They weren’t his buddies, not the demons she was referring too anyway, but she wasn't likely to believe that.

“Never been one for conformity, I guess.” Eddie grinned, stifling a laugh.

Understatement.

“Seriously, why are you watching him? What are you planning?”

“Nothing, just… looking in on an old friend. I swear.”

“Sure, you and Steve used to be friends. I’m supposed to believe you're not here to ruin his chance, attacking an old ally turned enemy now that he’s vulnerable?”

“What do you mean?”

She narrowed her eyes, considering him carefully.

“You actually don’t know, do you?” She backed away, looking him up and down. “You came to the door that first day, but never came inside. Why?”

“The way he looked, I… don’t think he remembered me.”

She snorted a laugh. 

Which Eddie did not appreciate. “Jeez, way to kick a guy when he’s down.”

“Sorry.” She said, not sorry at all. “Look, it’s nothing personal. He doesn’t remember anything. He’s human now.”

“What?! Why?”

Robin shrugged. “He wanted more. He loved another before God and They took mercy on him, sent him here for a chance at a different life.”

“Who?” Eddie gasped, reeling.

“Who, what?”

“Who did he love enough to leave Heaven for?”

“What do you care?!” She sneered, throwing her hands up. “Y’know what? Don’t answer that, It doesn’t matter. Not even I know who it is, and I'm his best friend.”

Best friend.

Eddie deflated. Had Steve replaced him so easily?

Robin plowed ahead, either unknowing or uncaring of the pain she was inflicting. “I know your kind. You’re bad news. If you really were friends before, if you ever cared about him, you’ll leave him alone.”

Eddie tried to go back to his life, such as it was. He wandered the underworld aimlessly, plagued by thoughts of Steve.

Was it Eddie… that he loved?

Was he okay? Was he happy? Was he safe? He was so vulnerable now– to sickness, and injury. Shit, humans dropped dead from heart attacks all the time!

Eddie could deal with it before, knowing he was out there somewhere, even if they couldn’t be together. But now… now Steve would grow old and die one day, and he couldn’t take that.

The idea of living forever in a world where Steve no longer existed was intolerable.

He went to Lucifer.

It was a long shot, he knew. He’d abandoned his de facto leader long ago, but back in the war Lucifer had been fond of him and Eddie hoped against hope that their history would help his case now. 

The former angel all but laughed in his face. He held no such power, not that he would ever grant Eddie’s wish if he did. 

“What a waste that would be,” the Devil had said, still holding out hope that someday Eddie would break and join him. 

Desperate, he returned to the coffee shop, taking up his old post, and waited for Robin to confront him.

As she stalked angrily into the alley, he hurried to explain. 

“I know what you’re going to say, but hear me out. I love him, Robin, always have. That’s why I fell. I was outraged at being denied this thing that humans were given freely to take for granted.” 

She pursed her lips. 

“You don’t believe me.”

Robin sighed heavily. “I can’t believe I'm saying this, but I do, actually.”

“Really?”

She pulled a scrap of paper from her pocket and handed it to him.

Eddie unfolded it with shaking hands, a perfect sketch of his face.

“I found this, along with several others. Apparently he’s been drawing them for weeks. Somehow, deep down, he remembers you.”

Tears poured down his face as he continued to stare at the proof of Steve’s feelings for him.

“Why did you come back here?” She asked.

“To beg you to take a request to God, plead my case… please.” 

“What for?”

“To make me human too.”

“Are you sure? If They agree to it you’ll be just like him, vulnerable, with no memory of who you were.”

“I know. I’ll just have to trust that we’ll find each other again.”

Eddie woke up feeling like he’d been having the strangest dream. He didn’t have time to dwell on it though, rent was due soon and he still hadn’t found a job.

He set out for the corner store to pick up a newspaper and found himself drawn to an adorable little coffee shop along the way with a help wanted sign out front. He knew the prices at a place like that were well out of his budget, but one look at the beautiful man behind the counter was enough to have him thinking– screw the budget. 

Besides, it couldn’t hurt to put in an application, even if he had no experience as a barista.

The man looked up as Eddie entered the empty shop, and their eyes met. There was something familiar about him. The man paled, eyes going wide. It was a curious reaction, but Steve, as his nametag read, shook it off quickly and forced a smile. 

“Good Morning, what can I get you?”

Gorgeous and the voice of an angel? Eddie was half in love already. 

He ordered the cheapest thing on the menu, a drip coffee, which Steve poured with shaking hands, cursing as a little of the hot liquid sloshed over the cup’s side, burning him. 

“You okay?”

Steve turned, offering his first real smile, laughing at himself as he shook his head.

Without a word he reached into his apron pocket and pulled out a small sketchbook, sliding it across the counter. “This is going to sound crazy, but I think I've been dreaming about you.”

Steve showed him then, page after page filled with drawings of Eddie's face. 

Eddie’s stomach flipped, suddenly realizing why Steve had looked so familiar. “I think I've been dreaming about you, too.”

As always, all my love and thanks to @penny00dreadful beloved friend and beta.

Also to @hitlikehammers and @theheadlessphilosopher for listening to me talk about this and reading it through as I attempted to parse this down from 3400 words to it's current form.

Some tags of those I recall expressing interest or i think might like this? (sorry if i miss anyone or if you didn't want to be tagged!): @griefabyss69 @pearynice @eriquin @cranberrymoons @momotonescreaming @kikidoesfanfic @brbsoulnomming @estrellami-1 @manda-panda-monium @hellion-child @dreamwatch @mentallyundone @finntheehumaneater @goodolefashionedloverboi @vegasol

[zeravmeta]

they were all fakers huh. not just koyan but all the alter egos of the foreign god even the foreign god itself with its quest for dominance they were all fakers who tried to surpass the original and who all had no true place among humans. koyan and limbo are obvious examples but it also applies to muramasa and rasputin (noted freaks and outcasts of their era and inhabiting individuals that reflect this accordingly) and holmes himself as a hidden traitor and reflection to moriarty.

koyanskaya wanted to emulate the monster that tamamo no mae once was, something that could freely torment and destroy humans, but tamamo was a being who had always strived for understanding yet was never shown compassion. shes so committed to the good wife role because its something that will have her accepted by other humans, and more specifically something that will help her understand human love. tamamo had always wanted love and acceptance by humanity, but koyanskaya already holds human love within her whether she likes it or not, not only because of her status as a beast but also because she's representative of the animals that have walked alongside humanity from the beginning. its why tamamo is her mirror, why koyanskaya was even classified as an alter ego of tamamo in the first place, and it's also why there's even a koyanskaya of the Light and a koyanskaya Go In The Dark: they not only represent the death and life zones of her reality marble, they're another emulation of tamamo having split herself apart into the tamamo nine (the bnuuy two?). koyanskaya isnt the tamamo no mae or a part of the nine, nor is she daji as well, but she is a being similar to them because she exists with the same natural dichotimatic feelings towards humans. they hold a love for humanity that is fundamentally at odds with their own nature as natural enemies of humanity.

I feel like this is in part why ibuki douji was the only servant that could be brought in from the outside: She's also a living calamity towards humans, a literal force of nature with a will of its own. she had amnesia entering tunguska because it was a world antithetical to humans, reflective of koyanskayas mindset but also her ideal vision of a world, full of beings removed from humans and defense mechanisms celebrating the murder humans are capable of. if you took her history with humanity away, the ibuki douji that's left is quite literally just a happy go lucky free spirit of nature in a world made for herself, no longer a venerated god or feared calamity.

deep down, it's what koyanskaya wanted for herself.

taigong knew that the fair faced golden fox was a being that couldn't help its nature, it was specifically born as a monster that was meant to torment and destroy humans, but he still fell in love with her not in spite of her nature but because of it. he knew that she was a monster that would only terrorize humans but as he sees her struggling to survive he can't help but empathize with that as a fellow human, and more than anything taigong follows through on dajis curse of immortality because that's what it meant to love her, to achieve her final dream. to carry the memory of someone you love

taigong and nikitich were the only servants able to be summoned into tunguska because they were the only ones who would have compassion for koyanskaya, and compassion, understanding is what's needed to defeat beasts of humanity. it's never about defeating the big enemy, its about reaching an understanding.

anyways they just needed like 1 extra tidbit to foreshadow this beforehand so that tunguska wouldnt have been so poorly received 2ish years ago (and i mean. we do have that moment in SIN with QSH thats even called out in koyanskayas profile) + proper scheduling to not have this critical story piece be a time limited raid event (lol epic of remnant gudaguda moment) but hey they're funny

[dangermousie]

Finished.

God, what a glorious, glorious, glorious ride, a truly solid epic drama in a way I haven't seen in a very long time - there were two other flawless cdramas for me this year - Lost You Forever 1 and The Ingenuous One - but TIO was a smaller scale story and LYF ended in medias res. AJTL was the only complete, epic cdrama this year for me, but oh boy, was it beyond.

First, my two tiny niggles - this is a drama where the 40 episode limit fit badly, like tightly pinching shoes. You can tell how they had to speed and cram to get in the resolutions of dynastic struggles in An and Wu and the war with Beipan. This drama really needed to have been 50 eps. (The cramming also resulted in the sole plot arc that made me go huh - LTG random decision to try to marry Ruyi before he rides off to what he thinks is his last battle and his just as random decision to go "oh well" and agree to release NYZ and then when NYZ shows up before he can be released because he broke out and wreaks havoc, let them walk out. Maybe if they had more time, it would have made more sense, otherwise it felt like an aberration in a character arc that before and after was consistent and made sense.) Second niggle is not really one because it's clearly due to censorship - the last minute redemption of the Wu emperor etc - the writer made is as believable as she could but you could feel the censorship sticky hands all over it.

But those are minor complaints. Overall this was solid from beginning to end, very adult and with secondary characters who all felt real and complex and interesting. A few thoughts:

Our main OTP was incredible. So adult, so competent, so badass but still feeling human. I bought that those two were larger than life legends AND flesh and blood people. And that chemistry!

I loved that this drama allowed relationships to be messy. Yes, we have our epic main couple but I especially loved what happened with Chu Yue and Shisan and LTG and Ying. I loved that neither was an epic romance. With CY and Shisan, I loved that they didn't make him realize he loves her forever blah blah - he was an incredibly consistent character - charming, loyal and utterly clear he's incapable of permanent commitment to a single woman and she never could change that. And yet he died in large part to protect her, and it's in keeping with his character and it makes sense that this solidified her remembering him forever - he's not just the one who got away, but he DIED for her. It's very clear if they both lived, this would have gone nowhere and ended with him wandering off or her moving on wanting commitment from someone who is capable of it, but as it is, it froze the possibility of love in ember.

And I loved the narrative of LTG and Ying. They both come into marriage in love with someone they can never have (Ruyi and YL), they both have similar backgrounds (royals but neglected and looked down upon), they both share the same goals (power but to take care of people) and they really are friends. I love that when we last see them, they have what is a great period marriage - no love but respect and common goals. And she still mourns YL and he probably still thinks of Ruyi but the thing is, I love that the narrative leaves the possibility of them eventually falling in love with each other (or other people) because as she tells him - you think you will always love a particular person but life is long. (And it's so true - she will remember YL until she's old, once again in part because of the unfulfilled possibility of it - but it doesn't mean she won't be able to open her heart to someone again.) It's a surprisingly hopeful ending for them and I love it. I'd totally watch a show where they discover love with each other tbh.

I did love that no character (except possibly Prince Danyang) got everything they wanted even if they emerged alive. They got some and had to give up some.

I loved what it had to say about having to be worthy of your power and position - you are not owed fealty by birth but you have to earn it. It was a surprisingly anti-imperial show for a recent cdrama.

All the deaths of our faves gutted me, none as much as Yuan Lu's. Oooof.

As to the ending, I can tell people are gonna have fits but I like it. I love many an ending legendarily reviled in cdrama fandom (Princess Agents and Novoland Eagle Flag have perfect endings in my opinion; I realize that opinion, especially about PA is enough to get me throttled in certain quarters but it is what it is) and I came to cdramas back when pretty much every costume cdrama ended horrifically tragically - think of the endings of the Chinese Paladins, The Myth (for a long time my n1 drama even though it made me cry so hard I threw up, ending-wise), The Young Warriors, Little Fairy, even Lan Ling Wang, Glory of the Tang Dynasty and Bu Bu Jing Xin if we are going somewhat later. I mean, one of my favorite dramas ever is Royal Nirvana and that ending is like drinking a thermos full of depression. This is nothing.

Honestly, I would have been fine if the ending for our OTP really was them dying pretty much together, in their different battles. That hint that they are alive and living with their kids is lovely and welcome, but I'd have been fine without it and it raises a lot of questions (though if anyone could fake their deaths and survive that sort of thing, it would have been them so fair enough.)

Anyway, this is basically my love letter to this drama. It was amazing and I am so glad I watched it.

[highpriestessaset]

Pick an image: allow your intuition to guide you in your selection.

NEO 🕶️

[Superpowers:]

Patient, sees the bigger picture or different perspectives, inquisitive, hard-working, looks to long term goals or delayed gratification, adaptable

[How to use:]

These skills help you to see eye to eye with other individuals and species. I see someone who is caring and eager to understand how another maneuvers throughout their life. Where many would be fearful or judgmental, instead, you are curious.

You may be interested in marine biology, veterinary duties, care giving, or anything that allows you to study, interact, care for, or capture the beauty of life- whether it be plants, animals, humans, etc.

[Message:]

It seems like a dream you may have is put on hold due to financial concerns. It feels that a fixed mindset may be at the root of the issue. The message for you says that utilizing a growth mindset will bring you a lot closer to achievement.

(Click here for resource.)

————————————————————

TRINITY 🕶️

[Superpowers:]

Leader, has a good sense of direction, bold, initiative, innovative, independent, free-spirited, energetic, playful/fun, light-hearted, innocent

[How to use:]

These skills help you to travel or maneuver around situations that may be difficult. It seems like you have your own level of inner peace you are able to maintain by knowing when and how to go at things alone.

[Message:]

You are fully capable of capturing some sort of entrepreneurship or self employment opportunities. There may be some confusion amongst yourself or from outside voices with opinions about what you should do.

The message for you is to release the expectations of others and any you have placed on yourself that limit your options. This may look like going along with a loved one’s vision for you that you may not be passionate about. Whatever those expectations are, in releasing them, you give yourself permission to take a risk on your own idea that can make YOU happy and provide financial security.

Let go of the fear of failure, let go of the “what will they think”, let go of the thoughts that keep you from making any moves at all. Life is a journey of discovery- discovering what we like or don’t like. Even when we discover things we don’t like, that is information that brings us closer to knowing ourselves. Use your superpower of maintaining your inner peace to step away from negativity and simply discover yourself.

————————————————————

MORPHEUS 🕶️

[Superpowers:]

Intuitive, intelligent, thoughtful, truth seeking, assertive, advocate, wise, private or reflective (introverted), health conscious

[How to use:]

I see someone fit to be some sort of an educator, speaker, writer, influencer or advocate for a cause. The Star card shows me that you are passionate about freedom and peace.

Someone specific here may be interested in justice/law by advocating for people wrongly incarcerated.

Another specific person here may be interested in advocating for body acceptance and/or health related topics. Sharing your story can be powerful.

[Message:]

The truth speaks for itself. When you communicate, it is important to remove the ego. We can speak on what is true for us but, we cannot force anyone to believe anything. If what you say resonates with another, they will be interested in hearing more from you.

The message here says it is important to remove the ego because at times, it makes it hard for others to listen. Your messages may be powerful but they can only impact those who hear AND receive them. Let go of the need for others to hear and receive your messages WHEN and HOW you want them to. Remember, the truth speaks for itself.

*Readings are for entertainment purposes only.*

-// Blessings 🌺

[artist-issues]

thinking about how Lady & the Tramp is all about the loyalty of love

Who better to teach that lesson than a pair of dogs?

Lady’s character looks like a naive young woman who’s always stayed in her place in society. Tramp’s character looks like a rough-and-tumble, “live a little” bachelor of the world.

But because they’re dogs, they get to tell us something about how staying in your place is the best thing to do; as long as your place is centered around love, you should be loyal to it.

Tramp jumps from girl to girl in the name of freedom.

To him, breaking the rules and living for himself, taking advantage of everyone he needs to, is freedom. The whole world is his. But when he’s faced with a choice between the whole world or the love of one sheltered girl, he realizes that loyalty to that love is better than the whole world.

Why?

Because Lady teaches him. She seems like the naive one, the one who needs looking out for, but she’s actually got the most important thing figured out—she’s all about staying loyal to those you love.

Even before she starts her romance with the Tramp. When her place in the home is jeopardized, does she get jealous of the baby? Does shy try to fight for her place in her owner’s hearts? No. With their help, she just makes room in her own heart to include the baby, too. She shifts her own position in order to stay true to her people.

Tramp’s never learned that people can make room in their hearts before. He thinks people only have a limited amount of space in there. But you can tell that he believes the same thing about dogs, not just humans—he, himself, keeps bouncing from place to place and girlfriend to girlfriend because he’s afraid his own place in their hearts is temporary.

That’s why he tries to impress his worldview on Lady. He’s trying to warn her. But he’s wrong, and she proves him wrong by making room in her heart for the baby, the new element, the one that looked like it was crowding her out.

When she’s at her lowest point and has been mistreated by Aunt Sarah, with no knowledge of when Jim Dear and Darling will come back, and has fallen in love with the Tramp, he tries to convince her to leave them for good. After all, he just heard how insecure the human baby was making her when they first met.

But Lady’s response is, “it sounds wonderful. But who would watch over the baby?”

So Tramp gets to see that she’s different than the other girl-dogs. She’s different than anyone he’s ever known. She has all the potential to be like him (he saw a glimpse of it when she helped him con the beaver, and started falling for her) but she won’t. She’ll stay loyal to what she loves—even when what she loves is hard, and at one point made her feel like she was losing her place.

Of course, then she gets taken to the pound and learns that he is the opposite of her—he’s like, anti-dog. He has no clue how to be loyal. He’s never been loyal, not even to dogs. He’s had all these other girls!

So that throws a wrench in everything, because he’s changed. He’s ready to “settle down” like the pound dogs predicted. He sees that to have love worthy of being loyal to is all the world he’ll ever need. Lady’s a dog’s dog, capable of endless sacrifice to stay loyal to her family, and he wants to be a part of it. But you know, everything gets screwed up.

And you can tell he’s changed, and learned from her example, and really believes in loyal, selfless love because even after she’s rejected him he comes back. As soon as she needs help, he finds a way into the house—which to him would have been like breaking into a prison before — and gets himself hurt helping a baby he doesn’t even know. Lands himself in the pound. Sacrifices himself and his precious freedom because loyal love is better than empty freedom.

But then Lady saves him. Because she’s loyal. She could’ve remembered that he’s a triple-timing jerk. She could’ve considered how much trouble he got her into. She could’ve even said to herself “they’re taking him to the pound, the single most terrifying location I’ve ever been to, and my family is here, so goodbye Tramp.” But she doesn’t do that. She leads the family to the rat, then to Tramp himself.

So even though Tramp is the world-wise one, it’s Lady who teaches him the most fulfilling place for a dog; loyal love. And it’s way way better than “a big hunk of world with no fence around it, all ours, nothing but the best.”

Which is why dogs are such a great choice of character to teach that lesson. Because they really are at their happiest and most fulfilled when they’re loving others, even if, in our minds, the happiest and most fulfilled beings would be those that are free.

Disney should go back to making ‘em like they used to.

[carica-ficus]

Review: "Evil Roots: Killer Tales of the Botanical Gothic"

Authors: Nathaniel Hawthorne, Arthur Conan Doyle, Lucy H. Hooper, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, H. G. Wells, Edmond Nolcini, M. R. James, Ambrose Bierce, Howard R. Garis, William Hope Hodgson, Edith Nesbit, H. C. McNeile, Abraham Meritt, Emma Vane

Editor: Daisy Butcher

Date: 03/01/2023

Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

________________________________________________________

I think I ordered this book some time during summer, after I accidentally stumbled upon it on an online bookstore. I love anthologies and I love plants, so this title definitely intrigued me enough to order it. I finally decided to read it around Christmas and finished it during a recent trip, so it's officially my first finished book of the year.

"Evil Roots: Killer Tales of the Botanical Gothic" is an interesting anthology of short horror stories by quite a few well-known authors. From the creator of Sherlock Holmes, to the acclaimed writer of "The Yellow Wallpaper", all the way to the legendary H. G. Wells, this collections features some hidden gems of the late 19th and early 20th century. While the stories are certainly old-school, they could still be regarded as timeless classics and masterful creations.

Most stories revolve around the fascination of the exotic - of unknown plants that are in some way dangerous to humans (or other organisms) and which originate from far away places, like South America. There's mentions of exquisite poisonous flowers, murderous liana, mysterious wisteria, and the weirdest of them all - carnivorous plants.

It is interesting just how much the writers and, by default, the general public were fascinated by exotic flora which, in one way or another, transcended the known laws of nature. Plants were considered sedentary, passive, and at the bottom of the food chain, but as new discoveries were being presented and as more people, professionals and amateurs alike, from the western civilization started their expeditions in new places, society was being introduced with oddities that seemingly didn't follow any established rules. So while the horror in this collection is displayed through various flora, the true horror is derived from the simple fact that humans fear what they cannot understand. One of the most frightening things a person, especially a scientist, can experience is realizing that they will never be able to fully predict nature's capability to adapt and to evolve.

Of course, this theme goes hand in hand with the understanding that it is dangerous altering the natural order of things. While this could also be understood as criticism to the human tendency to play god, there isn't much religious commentary throughout the collection. The stories are centered around ecology, evolution, and biology, highlighting how humans shouldn't meddle with something as powerful as nature - which they will never fully understand, let alone be able to control. Even though the writers do create a feeling of dread through the fear of nature, the horror is actually realized through characters that underestimate its abilities and that have the need to disfigure nature in order to measure their own capabilities.

Furthermore, this collection highlights the uncomfortable fascination western civilization had with other cultures. The urge to study new exotic phenomena on their own accord, to test the limits of human science on something they don't fully understand with little to no regard of the laws of nature and the test subject's true needs, is somewhat perverse. These scientists are conducting experiments in uncontrolled environments, and playing with their test-subjects in order to test their own abilities and knowledge. It is a portrayal of poor research. They're acting out of curiosity with little to no regard of the consequences. It is not their subjects that are evil, for they have been brought up and mistreated in an environment completely unnatural to their habitat, but their tormentor, who butchers them through extreme studies. This is usually evident through a secondary character, most often a colleague, who tries to stop the scientist in their mad experiment before it's too late. The horror is, therefore, found in the abuse executed by the brazen oppressor, not in their vicious, abnormal creations.

The fact that the aforementioned themes barely scratch the surface of all the ideas featured in this collection, prove how layered and compelling all the featured stories are. The editor also did a marvelous job with a lovely foreword and an intriguing introduction to each of the authors and their respective work. Of course, as with every short story collection, not all works are equally strong, but "Evil Roots: Killer Tales of the Botanical Gothic" is still a gorgeous anthology and a noteworthy testament to a relatively overlooked category of horror.

[raayllum]

Quick run down: 4 is the lowest typical score given, 10 the typical highest score given (although you can technically go up to 12). Making my post because I noticed Callum’s Justice ranking was at 6 (lower than I’d expected) and I always meant to do a lil more formal comparison between the trio so here it is I suppose.

Devotion: This is value is about duty, faith, and friendship. You’re motivated by the bonds of loyalty and your love for others.

Truth: This value is about fidelity, certainty, and authenticity. You’re motivated by finding strength in facts and by the principle and pursuit of knowledge

Glory: Have you ever wanted to be celebrated by history? This value is about legacy, fame, and fortune. You’re motivated by praise, acclaim, and your desire to be remembered.

Justice: Have you ever been compelled to fix what’s wrong? This value is about balance, virtue, and reward. You’re motivated by adherence to fairness and what you think is right.

Liberty: Have you ever resisted the control of others? This value is about freedom and autonomy. You’re motivated by a world without oppression or suppression.

Mastery: Have you ever needed to rise above your own limits? This value is about control, achievement, and skill. You’re motivated by power, growth, and progress.

Similarities:

Glory is a 4 for all of them. Utterly unsurprising I think - they’re all willing to do things regardless of recognition and aren’t motivated by any real self importance

Truth is a 6 for all of them. I find it interesting that Callum gets the “hide the truth to protect others” rather than Rayla, but we do see elements of that in TTM. For Ezran, it has less to do with a moral truth (Rayla) or how to handle the truth (Callum) but more to do with maturing to see the truth (“I ignored something that is true” —4x03)

For anything other than their Most Important Feature, everything else has roughly an 8. This makes sense as it is still a core value, i.e. Callum jumping off the mountain is very devotional, Rayla works very hard to find real justice, Ezran cares a great deal about placing autonomy in other people’s hands (S3), etc. 

In Betweens:

Ezran and Rayla both have Mastery at a 6 with Callum having it at an 8; this makes sense as he is driven to look for knowledge and power (through magic) in ways they are not / are mostly settled and/or disinterested in

Ezran and Callum both have Devotion resting at 8 - high, but not their highest values. This makes sense as according to the game, Devotion is how obligated you feel to others. Ezran feels beholden to Katolis but that’s something he’s largely grown into, and he feels a wider responsibility to the world at large, moving in between them as he can. Callum is very devoted to his loved ones (mainly Ez and Rayla, but also Zym in a lot of ways) and his desire for freedom often interplays with a desire to have autonomy/capability to protect and/or provide for them in key ways. 

Rayla and Ezran have Liberty at an 8, showing that they value freedom (Rayla’s bio includes her goal to free all people from terrible fates like the one she almost had with the binding ceremony, we’ve gone over Ez’s, etc) even if it’s not as high as Callum’s - but more on that later

Highest Values

Ezran’s is Justice at 10. This makes sense as he is the series’ embodiment of Justice thematically as well as the series’ Witness. This reflects his role as the peace maker for elves and humans and dragons, both politically and interpersonally with Callum and Rayla in S1 and S4 in particular. It is also embedded into the fact that his death itself would have been Justice and his survival is what allows true justice to actually continue, his decisions as king, and the fact he’s king at all, per Harrow’s words: “My father told me that about all, I must be a Just king.” 

Callum’s is Liberty at 10. This foreshadows his arc in season four in terms of a complete loss of control/freedom and why it screws with him so royally. While many of the characters agonize over making the right choice (or a choice at all), not having a choice at all is what torments him the most: “I can’t do anything!” (2x07) particularly when it comes to protecting or helping his loved ones. We see this especially in his quote under Liberty in which despite being crown prince and heir to the throne, he states that he is beholden to his inner circle rather than a sense of duty. In S4 he is concerned about Aaravos hurting his loved ones, and that fear of doing awful things to other people is what has him so especially worried over the situation, reaffirming his statement that “I value those close to me more than anyone or anything” certainly. 

Rayla is Devotion at 10. At first glance it’s easy to take her “My only allegiance is to my heart and those that know it” as a similar kind of sentiment to Callum’s “I value those close to me” statement, but we know what Rayla’s heart is aligned with: “My heart for Xadia.” Her heart is given to whatever she feels her duty is, to what feels right, hence why she risks everything for Phyrrah, someone she doesn’t know at all, simply because leaving the dragon there results in “every fibre in my body is telling me this is wrong.” Bloodmoon Huntress also expands on this further, drawing comparisons to her and Runaan’s sense of duty and love for the whole world, as well as precisely what led her to take on the assassination mission in the first place. In S1-S3 Rayla gets better at listening to her heart rather than shutting it down, although this has changed in S4. She’s learning to prioritize her loved ones more and more, but at the cost of her actual heart.

Misc Notes:

For Callum, it’s worth noting that Devotion and Mastery (magic) are of equal value to Callum and are definitely two cornerstones of his more hands on arc. Thus, we can likely deduce that as much as Callum undeniably values Liberty, the fact it’s his highest value is also because it’s the value that informs and guides his arc the most Thematically. This means that his desire to learn magic and be there for his loved ones is of equal measure in terms of his decision making, but we also see him clearly prioritize his loved ones in ways he does not do with his own pursuit of magic. 

[ Side note: And just as a comparison, Claudia - Claudia’s - devotion is also an 8, but Mastery is her 10, even though so much of her arc is driven directly by devotion to her family (although her bio makes it clear it is supporting her family and her father, not merely her valuing them, as the distinctions are important too). ]

Following this “Two Pillars holstered by One Theme” logic, we can break Ezran and Rayla down into a similar manner.

Rayla is defined by her initial quest of Justice and a growing sense of Liberty (cue: being literally freed from her binding, other symbolic cycles, etc) but this is bound together and streamlined through her Devotion to a cause to people and her family. We can see S4 bring this together directly in her devotion to Callum and her family and how they are both either already literally or becoming entangled / entrapped in forces beyond their control with Rayla wanting to free / protect all of them.

For Ezran, this means he is defined by his place as Justice thematically first and foremost, with Devotion and Liberty as his two tether-hooks: re a child king being put in chains to try and give his people a choice > forced conscription, as well as the work he’s doing to try to create peace and a Narrative of Love (devotion) in S4.

Thus, the highest value for each of the Trio is what informs them at their core and subsequent thematically, with their two respective pillars as how those things are motivated and manifest throughout, with of course a good dose of overlap beyond all three. But either way, I just thought it was Neat™

Closing Note

One thing I found interesting when actually going each beat of their bios is that Rayla and Ezran are inverses of each other and very closely aligned. They share the exact same 3 values, all in similar amounts (either 8 or 10) and just rotate one out for their respective highest: for Rayla, Justice is at an 8, and for Ez, it gets bumped up to a 10 and his devotion down to an 8. This closeness between them, and how Callum diverges, lines up with how I’ve thought of and how I’ve written each of the trio for a while now, re: meta dated September 2021 about this exact difference, well before TOX came out.

Because Callum, strangely enough, does not have Justice™ as a particularly high value. It’s actually on the lower end of his scale, with other heroic characters like Amaya, Janai, and Aanya having it as a 10, an 8, and 8. The only none villain adjacent character (Soren, Viren, Claudia) with a Justice as low as Callum’s is Lujanne, and Callum’s justice ranking is the lowest of the trio’s. This is interesting particularly because Justice is defined by fixing what’s wrong/broken, a sense of fairness and balance. And while Callum wants to have positive impacts on the world and make things better, it shows that his big heart is also equally if not more so tethered to pragmatism, perhaps, compared to his family, even in decisions made like leaving with the egg in the first place being what was also safest for the egg and particularly Ezran during the attack on the castle. 

And well, if you know, you know ;) 

[jessamine-rose]

So question with all darlings and how they all act towards each other how would they be meeting Pierro’s darling and what would their dynamic be (if that made any sense)?

Read my Yandere! Harbinger fics and the first Darling Crossover here!!

Thanks for your interest in my darlings, Anon!! Savior has officially joined the group (๑･̑◡･̑๑)

꒰ Savior/ Pierro’s Darling ꒱

♡ Savior is the first and oldest darling. Because she is rarely seen by the public and Fatui, few people know of her existence. From afar/ by Pierro’s side, she gives off a mysterious and solemn first impression. But up close, she is regarded as extremely kind and friendly <3

♡ Savior is genuinely eager to interact with the other darlings since she rarely gets to socialize. She’s…bothered by the details of their love lives, and once asked Pierro why so many Harbingers are twisted like him Regardless, she only met each darling after she was broken, so who is she to destroy their false happiness??

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ Assistant/ Dottore’s Darling ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ

♡ Savior is most familiar with Assistant since they’ve known each other for 400+ years. She finds her very smart and capable for a human. During their rare interactions, they engage in long conversations and chess games. Unfortunately, Pierro warns her not to get too close to Dottore and Assistant :<

♡ Assistant became curious about Savior after Dottore once called her a “fascinating albeit off-limits specimen.” She’s noticed that Savior gets tight-lipped whenever she asks about her previous life or mentions the Fatui’s Archon Residue experiments. Who exactly is the Jester’s darling?? For now, she can say that Savior’s company is enjoyable.

⬩ Kitty/ Pantalone’s Darling ⬩

♡ Savior finds Kitty adorable and secretly wishes to pet her cat ears. Because Kitty is the only darling who makes public appearances, Savior asks her for gossip/ info on the Fatui’s diplomatic relations. She was very concerned upon hearing that Kitty once owned a Vision, but the most she can do is socialize with her.

♡ Kitty finds Savior’s friendliness refreshing as a fellow lonely extrovert. She admires her maturity, embroidery, and pretty outfits + veil. On a less genuine note, she knows that befriending Savior could benefit Pantalone’s relationship with Pierro. Best-case scenario, their future children will be friends >:3

✿ Damsel/ Capitano’s Darling ✿

♡ Savior is curious about Damsel since she is the newest darling. She was very surprised to hear that Capitano got married, but recognizes their compatibility and “loving” relationship. Given Damsel’s melancholy disposition, asocial nature, and refusal to talk about her past…….it’s no wonder that Savior feels the need to treat her with extra kindness ;-;

♡ Damsel doesn’t know how to interact with Savior. She finds her kindness too good to be true and questions whether it is genuine—or mere pity. She’ll give her credit for the one time Savior saw her newly-pressed achlys flowers and gave info on the plant. But essentially, the Jester’s darling is a stranger whom she won’t see again for a very long time.

Thank you again for this ask!! It warms my heart whenever someone expresses their love for my darlings, and I'm glad that y'all enjoy Savior's character ヽ(；▽；)ノ

[nikethestatue]

How would you respond to those who claim that Azriel doesn't want Elain to grow as a person, doesn't want her to learn about her powers and prevents her from going on any missions? Kind of how he did it in ACOSF?

I don't think it's true at all.

I think Azriel is thoughtful, protective and cautious. And I think it extends to everyone--not just Elain.

Also, unlike Cassian and Rhys, I don't know if he is so gungho on training all these newly Made women. I think he feels they should be comfortable first, before throwing them into dagerous, unfamiliar situations.

I feel like it goes very much along with his mysterious personality--we know that Rhys is defined by magic and power--so he teaches Feyre about her magic and power. Cassian is defined by his physicality and his warrior background--so he teaches Nesta and the others how to use their bodies and how to fight.

Azriel, it seems, is not yet defined quite so concretely. He's got magic, a LOT of magic, but he isn't (yet) a High Lord who utilises it like Rhys, for example. He is a warrior like Cassian, but we don't necessarily equate him with that part of his personality.

He is a shadowsinger, he is a spy. Elain is a Seer. They both see and hear things that others don't. He was the one who uncovered her Gift, and the one who encouraged her to use it, explain what she was Seeing and feeling. He didn't hide her Gift from her. He didn't argue about her using it. He was perfectly fine with having her understand what she was dealing with and was a catalyst for that.

BUT, he is also very rational. And he understands that sending an untrained individual hunting for Death Troves isn't a great idea. Nesta's scried before. The nature of Nesta's power and relationship with the Cauldron is different from Elain's powers. He saw firsthand how Elain was lured by the Cauldron and I think he is aware of the Cauldron's 'love' for Elain. So yeah, no way in hell would he want her out there, traversing the world looking for magical items. I dont think it's him limiting or stifling her. I think it's being protective and understanding her capabilities, probably better than Rhys and Cass. He did the same with Mor--a very trained warrior, full of power and magic--and yet he absolutely forbade her from going to the Human Lands. He knew her limitations in that situation as well.

Unlike Rhys, and even Cassian, I don't think Azriel is the one to put others in unnecessarily risky situations. He reminds me of Ruhn, who is protective of Bryce, and doesn't want her to do stupid, dangerous crap all the time. But, he equipped Elain with Truth Teller for the final battle, and didn't insist on hiding her somewhere. I think, more than most people, he understands the time of what's appropriate and when. Amren knows that Elain is powerful and can take care of herself, but Azriel understands that as well. I think he is just a lot more reluctant to send these girls into situations that are wrought with danger.

[muzzleroars]

I like to think that what partially motivated Lucifer to finally snap and Rebell against hell was him actually meeting and talking to Adam and Eve and realizing "Holy fuck I dont want them nor their future gens to be tortured forever" and seeing them grow, change and learn as well as having a choice in who they wish to be (smth angels cant really do) and maybe just maybe the hypothetical that if everyone in heaven, both angels and humans are immortal they'll all eventually land in hell to be tortured forever (considering eternity is a long time and a long time to accidentally Slip up)

i definitely think the human issue is primarily what drove his dissent, and i think the idea is supported well enough by the testament alluding to lucifer's fall. initially, of course, he was thrilled by god's new design - "we will make man in our image" is a pretty intriguing pitch, but lucifer's questions quickly began to rise to the surface as that idea took shape. a creature made in god's image, taken to mean that human beings will be boundlessly inventive and have the capacity to create endlessly, something the angels don't have, means they will have a world just BURSTING with new ideas and more to love. however, humans will be restricted, beings of flesh that have a much smaller scope of awareness and limited senses, but that isn't necessarily a terrible thing - they will live in their own world of peace, a beautiful garden made for all their generations to grow in. something goes wrong though, something feels off to him when he begins to understand how curious they will be, how they will learn and how they will be self-governing - they will truly possess themselves as god does and in ways he did not impart to his angels. yet humans were to be tested, and if they were fail then their lives become ruinous, they bring pain, disease, violence, and untold burdens into the world as their punishment, until death takes them in the short lives they have. they will be subject to all evil, a design cruel enough in itself, but hell put the nail in the coffin for him.

because he is left with the how. how can beings so small, born without any knowledge or inclination and living for just a few short years, in a world filled with evil, confusion, and anxiety, be expected to hold god's laws in perfection? it planted a growing seed of misgiving in him, of doubt in god's goodness - a place of eternal torment for what would be, in most people, a small life of mistakes. it shook lucifer's love....because his love burns for all of god's creation now too. he couldn't bear to see these humans tortured beyond all time and it's true too that it made him fear for all of them. could hell house them all? could heaven be emptied? could god, in all his power and all his growing need to be obeyed and adored beyond what his creations even seem capable of giving, cast them all out and simply make new children that he thinks could satisfy his demands? because humanity feels an awful lot like god wants something else from what he has, beings of pure free will that will love him endlessly because his angels just aren't enough. nothing is enough. and i think that thought sparks his unease to the point of rebellion. nothing is enough for god. he looks upon heaven, he sees the seraphim like himself that are wholly devoted to singing praises all day and all night in god's presence, he sees the archangels made to hold up and exalt his throne, he sees an expansive kingdom full of worship by all who inhabit it...and god wants more. will he keep creating to this end, over and over, beings made out of nothing and then soon enough cast off into the pit? cycles of endless torture, for all time. it was a heavy, harrowing thought, so ghoulish it seemed unthinkable, yet hell was there, and humans would be condemned to it if they "failed".

if he did meet adam and eve in any way, that if would be erased and hell's usage would become a certainty. not because he finds evil in them, but because they are curious, they want to learn and they like to share with one another. they have god's essential spark in them, yet he denies them the fundamental knowledge of good and evil knowing full well their divine nature and the intelligence he gave them. what's worse is that it seems likely in this scenario that the serpent in the garden is likely from god as well - while traditional christian belief holds that the devil tempted them, the serpent, canonically, has no identity (satan is HIGHLY unlikely given genesis's age besides) and so...adam and eve obeyed, yet god decided to push them again. he gave his orders, they listened, but it wasn't enough. i like the idea that maybe lucifer finally broke when god sent that serpent, when he saw that no matter how humans obeyed, they would be tested until he found a way to make them fail. because they hadn't touched that fruit. they took god's word and did good, despite all their contrary nature. it just furthers the fear that they are all destined for a fate of damnation, that god will push and push and push until his creations fail him, that whatever goodness he has is being devoured by something within him that lucifer is sure he cannot fathom.

yet i think, even until the end, lucifer believed he could sway god's mind. he is the satan, the adversary, part of his role meant to question and now, to accuse. so maybe he was meant to call this cruelty for what it is, maybe he was meant to condemn hell as an institution...at least, maybe he can change this before it goes too far. yet even if he had any anxiety about what punishment this might incur, his stand had to be taken for humanity and for the host of heaven, lest they be subject to the same tests and wrath. unfortunately, lucifer would find out god's brutality is unending when one dares threaten to remove an ounce of their adoration for him.