#the using it for my to do lists also has the extra benefit of me not losing to do lists

[readingwriter92]

I love how on stressful weeks recently I’ve actually been managing to massively use my little agenda! Like I’ve actually so far stuck with it! It’s got all my funky little things in it. I’ve been using it to write me to do lists. Like. It’s been good vibes and I’m enjoying

[narafeedee]

Top 10 weight gain hacks?

In no particular order:

1. Replace everything you can with the higher calorie version. This may seem obvious but also consider alternative ingredients and increasing quantity of ingredients, for example swapping milk or water with heavy cream, adding double the butter that’s called for, etc. I know that that’s a no-brainer but it really does make a difference if you’re cooking a lot at home.

2. Surround yourself with snacks. When I shop and get a bunch of snacks, I just leave the grocery bag next to where I sit on my couch. Cookies, chips, poptarts, pastries, hand pies, you name it. So any time I’m feeling peckish or I’m just bored and need something to do, I have something within arms reach. I can mindlessly pack away an extra couple thousand calories a day this way and not even notice.

3. Create smaller goals. This one can be a little challenging, of course we all want to hit our ultimate goal as quickly as possible. But it’s so easy to get discouraged when you’re looking at a number that seems so far away. Breaking your goals up into manageable chunks makes the process quicker and more successful than lamenting over not gaining “fast enough” and losing steam. It also gives you reason to celebrate more often than if you’re only looking forward to the next 50-100lbs. For example, say you’re starting on 01/01 at 300 and your ultimate goal is 350. For the month of January your goal is to hit 310, for February it’s 320, and so on and so forth. That way you’re only really “pushing” for the gain for a few days at a time, if you even need to push at all. I hope that makes sense lol

4. That belly tapping thing actually works, lightly tap above your navel and continue tapping as you move from center to left. It may take a couple rounds of this, but in less than a minute you should feel your stomach start feeling empty again. It really really works, it’s also great for when you’re stuffed to the point where another bite will make you sick - just do the tapping thing and the pain and nausea dissipates. I don’t know the science behind this but it’s something I use on a weekly basis and has been a lifesaver.

5. Diet soda. I’ve always been a Diet Coke addict but I’ve found in my gaining journey that the days I drink Diet Coke I am OBSESSED with sweets and sugary treats. Otherwise I’m not too into sweet things, but when I’m chugging aspartame? Oh god it’s game over, I’d eat straight sugar if I had to.

6. Buy the bigger clothes in advance and wear them. This one is hit or miss, cause I love feeling my clothes bursting at the seams, but on the other hand it takes a lot of effort to get super fat and maintain it, so being comfortable as possible is also a must. I do wear the super tight ones still too, but I alternate depending on the day. If you have clothes that are (temporarily) loose on you, not only will you be comfortable but you’ll also have the added benefit of feeling yourself outgrow those too, which to me is more impressive than outgrowing something that was already a little snug.

7. Preset meals; if you’re a fast food junkie like I am and eat every one of your meals out of a greasy brown bag, this is a game changer. Spend a little time making lists of what you like from fast food places and their respective calorie counts. Then come up with realistic 2000+ calorie meals from that. Not stuffings so much as just a casual everyday lunch. So if you know that you need to hit a minimum calories per day, it’s super quick to order exactly what you need and you don’t have to put any effort into it. A lot of apps let you save your favorites to a separate list anyhow.

8. Fast food apps. If you don’t have a rewards app for every fast food place in a 20 mile radius of your home, are you even a feedee? All jokes aside, the amount of free or deeply discounted food I get every day is insane and I am so proud of my points balances lol this is one of my top hacks, I eat so much fast food anyway why wouldn’t I reap the rewards from that?

9. Eat before bed. Most of my eating happens within 2 hours of me falling asleep at night. I would conservatively say half of my daily calorie intake happens in the evening. It works, do it.

10. I’ve been gatekeeping this website for the last 9.5 years, but this is the most accurate calorie calculator I’ve ever used. It tells you your estimated weight over the next few months based on your body metrics and estimated calorie intake (or rather your daily goal lol) and has been consistently accurate for me in my gaining. I use it to plan my gains/other feedees gains and our daily and weekly calorie goals 😉

[delulu-with-wandanat]

International Affair

Welcome to my shameless self-insert series🤭 Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Last

Reader Description: Masculine style, They/He, AFAB, International Student, 20 Years Old. Sometimes will be describe using masculine terms (man, boy, handsome, etc)

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x InternationalStudent!Reader

Warnings: Specified age gap (Wanda is 34).

Summary: For their summer break, Y/n decided to spend it in a little town called Westview. It was there when they met Wanda Maximoff. A woman in her 30s with two kids, who seems to be attracted to the college student despite being married.

New York University's tuition was fucking ass. It really is, at a whopping $64,000 tuition fee per year. And that's only the tuition fee, the total estimate of studying in NYU plus living cost was probably over $90,000. Exactly it's fucking insane. Despite receiving a sponsorship from their parent's good friend and also financial aid from NYU, he still needed to figure out how to pay it back.

Sometimes they feel like smacking their head for choosing to study in a city where it's known for its back bank breaking living cost. Can you blame him though? Those tall buildings, shining lights, bustling nightlife, sounds of gunshots, and a huge opportunity for a creative person such as themselves, along with a dash of capitalism. Y/n couldn't help but be fascinated. That American dream that he had been chasing since he saw the Devil Wears Prada.

It was now summer vacation. Instead of going home for the summer, Y/n decided to join this Homeshare Summer program. Basically an elderly person provides home for students to share during the summer. The benefits are plenty, but most notably, cheaper housing rent. His roommates also joined this program, together they sublease their apartment. Adding extra funds to their breaking bank account.

In return, the students must help their elderly host with basic domestic needs. Mostly light household tasks; preparing and sharing meals, tidying up, chores, walking a pet, etc.

Y/n ended up matching with someone in a small town called Westview somewhere in New Jersey. As much as he loves New York, he wanted to spend his summer somewhere else in America.

He matched with a lovely widow named Melina Vostokoff. He learned that she has 2 daughters, both whom are adults with their own respective career. She needed a companion, understandably so, and Y/n was more than happy to assist her in anyway she might need.

"Y/n." Melina called.

"Yes, Mrs. Vostokoff?" Y/n looked up from their laptop, they were sitting on the dinner table editing some footage.

"Oh dear, please, I told you to call me Melina."

"Sorry, Melina. Force of habit." He said with a smile. "What's up?"

"Would you please send all this batches of cookies around the neighborhood? I already have a list of houses on where you can drop them." Melina is known for sharing batches of cookies for free around the neighborhood. Why? Out of kindness.

And also the fact that she loves baking, but ended up not being able to finish it all. So she shares them around the neighborhood.

"Sure, Melina! I'll do that right away."

So he sets of to drop off delicious dessert for Westview citizens. Melina had told them that this was a good chance to ask around for a summer job as well. Which is what he had initially planned to do anyway. Finally they reached the last house, Maximoff Household. They weren't so lucky with the other neighbors, but last one's a charm right? He rang the doorbell.

A person then opens the door. "Hello, I was just-" Holyfucking shit. This woman was absolutely gorgeous.

"May I help you?" She ask, god her voice is sexy.

"Uhhh..." Snap out of it! "Sorry! I'm Y/n, I'm the student staying over the summer at Mrs. Vostokoff. She told me to drop off her Bi-Weekly batches of cookies."

Wanda wasn't stupid, she noticed their nervousness and found it adorable. "Lovely to meet you, Y/n. I'm Wanda, Wanda Maximoff." She offered her hand.

"Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mrs. Maximoff." He shook her hand.

"Do you go to Westview University?" She was rather intrigued by the younger one.

"No, ma'am. I actually go to NYU, I'm studying film production."

Wanda raised an eyebrow and smiled. "How impressive. Though I must ask, why choose to spend your summer here?"

Damn... her smile.

"Mainly a much cheaper living cost, other than that I figured It'll be good for me to explore other parts of America. New Jersey is not far so it's a good place to start."

"Ah, an International student I see. Is it one of those Homeshare programs?"

"It is!" The student beamed.

What a charming smile he has, Wanda thought to herself. "Say, how old are you, Y/n." She ask while leaning against the door frame, her tone was... rather flirty.

"Um... I'll be turning 21 this year." Wanda hummed at the answer. For what reason Y/n doesn't know either. "Here are your cookies, ma'am." Well shit, he was getting nervous again. Obviously, Wanda staring at him with a look he can't quite pin.

"Oh! Thank you, dear. My sons absolutely love Melina's cookies." She took the container from them.

"Well that's no surprise, I could live off from those cookies alone." They said while laughing lightly. "So I take it you've lived here for a while?"

"Yes, I've lived here for years with my twin boys and husband." Damn it, they thought. "Anything you would like to know?"

"Yes actually! I've been looking for a summer job, but I haven’t had any luck."

"Well, lucky for you, a friend of mine who owns the Cafe in town is looking for a new Barista. She just recently opened the position."

"That's great news! Thank you so much for letting me know, Mrs. Maximoff." They said with a smile, Wanda had another idea in mind.

"However, I think they're only offering part-time. If you're looking for some extra work, I may need a few... help around the house. Would you be interested?" She asked with a devilish smile.

Y/n, being too excited at the possibility of finally landing a job, failed to notice the flirty undertone in Wanda's sentence. "Absolutely!"

"Splendid! Come over to my house tomorrow and we'll discuss the details."

"I will see you tomorrow, Mrs. Maximoff. Thank you again!" The young man said with a bright smile, he started walking backwards onto the sidewalk.

"See you tomorrow, Y/n." Once they turned their backs on her, Wanda bit her lip. She had multiple things in mind for Y/n to help her with.

I did a quick research on the law of international students working in the US. I didn't get into detail but it basically said yes but there are restrictions. So ignore the actual laws, and y'know just - whatever man it's a fanfic :') When I saw the estimated cost of studying in NYU i almost cried-

Also I hope you guys don’t mind I go with a more masculine reader for this one (i really want to be called a good boy by Wanda)

I hope the reader description doesn’t confuse you guys, if it does. Its ok, i self inserted myself and im very confused abt my gender-

[astro-ellie]

you should write about how the reader gets mad at abby and tells her she dont want nothing to do with her and gives her back all her shit and abby is just like “oh okay, whos hoodie is that? i want it back, and the shirt under i bought that for you. i think the whole outfit” which leads to something ykykykykk ☮️

it’s immature.

it’s immature, childish and stupid, but after your last fight, you can’t bring yourself to care. you’re fed up with abby and her antics, and on top of that, you’re angry.

you’re angry with her attitude and how she seemingly doesn’t really care about your relationship. she’s always been flaky, cancelling dates last minutes and not showing up to important things- well, things that are important to you.

abby is a busy woman, she always has been. you’re also busy, but you still manage to make it to her stuff. the only time you’ve missed a game of hers is that time you had the flu, and you even show up to training sessions that are extra important to you.

but abby doesn’t do that for you. there’s always something that she just can’t miss, and it has started to feel like you’re at the bottom of her priority-list.

it was an ongoing issue in the relationship, and something you needed to deal with, but you still expected her to show this once. not even abby was clueless to not know how important your birthday was.

when she didn’t show up at the restaurant, you had waited at first. checking the time every five minutes, giving her the benefit of the doubt until the feeling of embarrassment became too much.

you tried to call her, just once. when she didn’t pick up, you took your jacket and left. the way the staff had looked at you in pity only made the feeling deep in your stomach grow.

just like you expected, it takes two days of radio silence from your side for her to come crawling to your front door. you know this all too well, she’ll be pounding on your door with that guilty look on her face.

never even apologies before she uses your hidden spare key to open the door, then she’ll slip into whatever room your hiding in. press a kiss onto your cheek, and it’s like nothing ever happened.

not this time though. you’ve dumped all of her stuff in your hallway, and you’ve just been waiting to hear the sound of her car pull up next to your home, just waiting for her to use the spare key, just waiting for her to see the boxes with all her stuff in.

you can hear the door being unlocked, hear the front door open and you certainly hear abby’s exclaim of; “what the fuck?” all the way into your bedroom.

it’s immature and childish, but it’s working.

it has abby stomping into your bedroom, with furrowed eyebrows and a hand on her hip. you know you’re being immature, but still you feign nonchalance and look down on your phone. act busy, act busy, act busy.

“why is all that shit in the hallway?”

“your shit.”

“what?”

“it’s your shit. your shit is in the hallway, abby.” the tension in the room becomes thick, and it seems that abby now can feel it too. you see the way she shifts her weight around on her feet, the way she opens her mouth only to close it again.

“are you fucking serious?” her lips are pressed into a thin line, and she’s moving towards you with unsure steps.

you can’t help but let out a sigh, leaning back on your elbows on the bed. “yes, i’m fucking serious.”

“why is all my shit packed up then? can you tell me that?”

this all feels bittersweet, ‘cause abby is right where you wanted her, she’s getting angry and upset and that means she’s feeling exactly how she made you feel.

but the fact that she can’t see it, can’t see what pushed you to put all her belongings left behind in your apartment in those cardboard boxes makes you feel worse. why can’t she just see how bad she’s been treating you?

“your shit is in the hallway ‘cause i’m sick of you. i’m sick of your shit, abby.” you’re noticeable upset now, the pitch of your voice going up as you speak.

the room becomes silent, and god, the way abby looks at you is almost enough to make you feel guilty. almost. she looks like a kicked puppy, she nervously takes a step back and you see the way her lip trembles.

“are you- are you breaking up with me?”

her question is met with silence. if you speak now, you won’t be able to stop the tears from flowing. it’s too much, and you’re afraid that you’ll let her win. that one more look at her sad expression will have you apologising and pressing a kiss to her forehead, then going back to your normal lives as if this never happened.

you’re not looking at her anymore, your eyes instead trained on your lap. if you were looking at her, you would be able to see how abby’s expression was changing from her sad, sad puppy look into an angry, aggravated one.

when she says your name, you almost wince. it’s dripping with anger, and it hurts. ‘cause abby has never said your name like this before.

“if you’re just going to fucking dump me, i want all my shit back.” now that catches your attention, looking up in confusion. before you can open your mouth, point out the fact that all her shit is already packed, abby’s voice booms out again.

”like that fucking shirt for example, oh, and the hoodie. yeah, you know the fucking one.” she’s storming over to your closet, ripping it open, and rummaging around. you know which hoodie she means, and you feel heat creeping up your neck.

it’s the hoodie you stole from her a few months into your relationship. abby let you keep it ‘cause wearing it helped you sleep when she wasn’t there, making it feel like she was physically there with you in the bed.

“fuck you, abby.” you’re standing up in anger now, hands clammy. it’s her time to be immature, childish and stupid.

“oh now you decide to speak up. so, will you tell me what the fuck is up with you?” when abby is met with silence, she barks out a menacing laugh. “okay, then give me my fucking shit back. now.”

your eyes are burning, and you’re desperate to do something back. so, you pull abby’s shirt, the shirt you’ve been wearing, off your body and throw it at her. “here, happy now?”

she looks shocked for a few seconds before a taunting smile appears on her lips. she's raising her hand and pointing her finger at you, taking one, two, steps forward and saying something. you can't make it out, too busy staring at how her lips move.

it's the adrenaline from arguing, that must be it. that must be what pushes you to take a step towards her, and suddenly you're pressing your lips against hers. or was it abby that pushed hers against yours?

everything after that is a blur. abby brings her hands to your face, holding your face in between the rough palms of her hands. she walks you backwards until your legs hit the edge of the bed. when you sit down, abby pulls away. if you weren't so far gone, you'd be embarrassed by the whine you let out at the loss of her lips.

abby stands between your knees, moving her head to your ear. you use all your energy to focus on her voice, to try to hear what she's whispering against the side of your face.

“i’m not going to- not going to give it you” she’s panting in your ear, and all you can do is whine in frustration as you try to grind your hips, seeking relief. “you’re not getting anything. not until you fucking talk to me, you get that?”

moving your hand to the button of your pants and grunting out a “fine, i’ll just do it myself.” you almost except abby to try to stop you, for her to just cave in.

instead, she leans back and gives you a teasing smile. “fine, get off on your own. you know it won’t feel as good as me though, right?”

and you hate how she’s right, but you can’t let her know that. so, in a haste you shimmy your way out of your pants and move your hand towards your underwear.

the way abby’s eyes follow your movements with lust makes you feel good, powerful. for a few seconds, you forget why you’re here in front of her on the edge of the bed. forget about the look of anger and hatred a few moments ago. you almost even forget the way she made you feel at the restaurant, that humiliation.

the spell breaks when you hear abby’s voice again, her voice brings you back to reality.

“what are you waiting for?”

clearly, abby wants a show. so you’ll give her a show. slowly pulling your panties off your body, letting them fall down onto the floor next to her. the way abby’s eyes fixate on your cunt spreads confidence throughout you.

slowly moving your hands from your bra clad chest, relishing in the way abby looks at you, the way she bites her lips while looking at you.

you’re teasing her, moving one of your hands to the back of your back and unclasping your bra. the bra gets thrown to the side of the bed, and abby lets out a breathy sigh at the sight of your naked chest.

the way abby is still completely dressed in front of you, still standing in between your legs, while you’re completely undressed sends a wave of pleasure throughout your body.

you’re now fed up with your own teasing, moving your hands from your upper body downwards until you reach the space in between your thighs. abby’s eyes almost roll to the back of her head when you slip a finger inside of you, the sight making her weak in the knees.

leaning your head back in pleasure as you slowly start moving the digit, you quickly realise it’s not enough.

so, instead you try using two fingers. moving them in and out of you at a slow pace, you almost don’t notice it when abby suddenly sits down on the floor, on her knees, eye level with your pussy.

when she grabs the hand you got between your legs, you huff out an annoyed “what?”. she’s just sitting there, completely quiet, before she eventually says “fuck it” and before you can question her she dives right in.

abby’s tongue feels heavenly, she knows you well enough to bring you pleasure quickly. her nose is bumping into your clit, and you can’t help but let out a pathetic moan at the feeling.

the way her eyes are hazed over with desire is enough to make you grind up against her face, desperate for more. you swear, you swear, you see abby move one of her hands down to her own crotch. you crane your neck to try to get a better view of it, and when you do you can’t help but let out a whine of her name.

she moans against your slick, and works her tongue faster. when she moves her face slightly upwards and suck on your clit, you reach your peak. heart beating fast in your chest, completely out of breath, you feel how abby moves away from you.

before you can feel disappointed by her distance, she sits on the bed and pull you upwards, further from the edge.

still fully clothed she lays beside you, who’s still coming down from your high. you’re too gone to think about the way she lays besides you, the way she moves her arm and tries to carefully hold you.

the room is silent once again, but the thick tension seems to have melted away and instead there’s something else in the air, something neither abby or you can quite put your finger on.

“can you please talk to me about it now?”

there’s a beat of silence, and it makes abby nervous. you don’t look at her, instead you close your eyes. after a few seconds, you cuddle into her side and whisper a quiet “tomorrow”.

[inklore]

—🍊. 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐒 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐀𝐔'𝐒 𝐎𝐔𝐓

this is not a writing challenge, this is just a list of summer au's that have been collecting dust in my google docs that i'm both sick of looking at, and also feel like for those who also really enjoy writing summery fics, could always use more inspiration or ideas for au's or scenario's (even if it's just smutty or fluffy blurbs).

please make note that anyone can use these for any fandom or character. it's literally for everyone, for whatever ship, gender, or verse. no one owns au's and everyone makes them their own and writes differently. so please do with the content below as you wish!!

you don't gotta tag me if you use one but would i love to read your beautiful work? hell yeah so feel free to if ya feel like it.

i separated each into categories + some might have added context or prompts because i have zero self control and like to be extra and add ideas onto things lmao.

hopefully someone finds these fun and helpful, happy writing my loves <3

LOCATION.

beach

ocean

ice cream parlor

lake town

ranch

summer camp

summer school

island

boat

fishing town

resort

the woods

national park

public pool

destination wedding

renaissance fair

lake house

bar

theme park

capecod

italy

winery / vinyards

country club

cruise ship

concert

RELATIONSHIP BASED.

brothers best friend ('unfortunately' spending the summer with your family)

neighbors au

exes back for the summer

bodyguard au (character a has to follow around reader whose some princess/rich girl on a vacation, bonus points if she's supposed to be on lockdown but refuses to stay at the hotel, even more bonus points if her parents sent her on this vacation as a rehabilitation for her bad habits)

best friends dad (you're spending the summer with your bestie and god her dads hot as hell)

mermaid x human

frat boy x good girl (last minute studying together before summer break, or maybe the frat is throwing a big grad party and reader decides to let loose for the first time in forever)

frat boy x sorority girl (it's giving rich hoes who can't stand each other who get caught doing something and have to do community service with each other alllll summerrrrr long, can you think of anything worse?!)

sitcom stars (they're both on some summer love show but fall for each other instead, or you're two celebs supposed to be fake dating on some mtv drama show in palm springs but you actually fall for each other)

park ranger x someone who thought going camping alone would be fun but oh shit i know nothing about the wilderness au

ex-best friends ex (a summer love but put revenge and 'we're only fucking because this friend screwed me over and it'll really show them' au anyone??)

lifeguard x parent au (or you saved my life let me repay you wink wink)

dads best friend

house sitter x house owner (or neighbor, or family member who came home early and wtf are you doing here and who are you?? or even the old i asked the neighbor to watch our house but also my wife wink wink)

babysitter who tags along on vacation with the family au

fake dating (for the summer)

friends to lovers was made for summer au's!!!

superhero x vigilante (nightly meet ups to keep the streets safe)

friends with benefits but only for the summer au

painter x muse

body found on beach x person who found them (+ the added bonus of the two of them working together to figure out wtf happened and how they got there)

sugar baby x sugar whathaveyou (free vacation? hell yeah)

roommates (renting a room for summer what could go wrong)

tour guide / local x tourist

camp counselor x parent of camper

friend group on a drama filled vacay au

the only single people at this resort for couples au

sad housewife x pool boy

DARK THEMED.

cult au

slasher au

hitchhiking gone wrong (or right)

monster au (summer is the perfect time to go exploring for the monster in the woods or the lake, ocean even, obviously)

haunted house au

ghost hunting au

hunter x prey (bonus points if they don't know they're being hunted until it's too late)

safe house au (gone wrong)

kidnapping au (it's giving 365 days but less shitty ok)

stranded au (on an island, in a creepy town, etc)

bestie's trip gone wrong au (the innocent looking guys at the pool who are gorgeous are actually super shitty and deadly omg, or the couple in the hotel room next to us are insane wow, or someone is killing us off...but it's someone within the friend group)

stuck in an abandoned amusement park au

INSPIRED BY.

grease au

dirty dancing au

x au (70s-80s pornstars au + added slasher element if ya wanna make it dark)

daisy jones & the six / rocker au (summer tour anyone?)

the white lotus (cheating au?? a couple hoping a vacation will fix their marriage, maybe even the whole shitty husband leaves you there and you fall for one of the resort workers)

50 first dates au (but make it 'i bet i can make you fall in love with me by the end of summer)

jurassic park au

i know what you did last summer au

friday the 13th au

the final girls au (aka you end up in your favorite movie and have to find your way out with a side of 'oh shit there's my fav character what if i stayed and made them fall in love with me instead', or go full final girls au and you're stuck in a cult horror movie and have to survive the night to get out of it)

outer banks / goonies au

schitt's creek au

romeo and juliet (1996) au

mama mia au (the prequeal tho aka boning a bunch of people and omg i'm pregnant who is the baby daddy tho??)

overboard au

OCCUPATIONS.

naturalist

farmers market vender

dog walker / dog sitter

dive bar singer

surfer

swim instructor

vet

journalist

camp counselor

author

cowboy

undercover pi

contractor

car wash attendant

lifeguard

gardener / landscaper

summer intern

tour guide

tutor

nanny

theme park owner

bartender

house sitter

summer farmhand

golf course caddy

sign-holder

movie theatre worker

uber driver

wedding photographer

hotel receptionist

RANDOM.

heatwave (how ever will we stay cool?)

shipwreck / stranded on an island au

rainstorm / hurricane au (stuck inside oh no what will we do??)

love triangle that shit

matchmaking au

love letters in a bottle au

drunken karaoke

kissing in the rain is top tier

workaholic letting loose au

(illegal) car racing au

road trip au

[coldresolve]

are you a torture apologist, or are you just dumb

... said with all the due diligence this subject warrants, etc etc. i’ve written posts about this before, it’s fallen on deaf ears, people either aggressively ignore it, or they go out of their way to take me in bad faith, and when the latter doesn’t work, they fall back on ye olde reliable: tone policing. but we’ve had that conversation too, haven’t we? it’s my culturally determined value of blunt honesty versus your culturally determined value of politeness. i express my opinions in a way that’s admittedly harsh and hyperbolic, and in so doing, my intention is to treat you like someone who is mature enough to distinguish my point from its delivery, and emotionally well-adjusted enough to deal with whatever the fuck some rando on the internet has to say about what you wrote. i also do it because its more fun this way. are we still cool? ffs lol

the thing is, right, it’s fucking easy not to write torture apologia. very straight-forward and simple, in my humble little opinion. you learn what the usual arguments are, and then you try to avoid accidentally making them – a bit like how, when you learn that white supremacy is a thing, you typically then go on to try and not write some wildly racist shit. same principle.

and i genuinely don’t understand why people are so opposed to this, specifically. they don’t know they’re doing it, which is fine, but then when you try to let them know they’re doing it, on the off-chance they even acknowledge that you said anything, they’ll hit you with an “its just for entertainment,” or “it’s not that deep.” so you tell them they sure seem to spend an awful lot of time weaving torture apologia into their vapid, shallow entertainment. and they don’t like that, jesus. but what else are you supposed to say?

i figure i just havent bullied people hard enough about it, honestly. and by bullied i mean pointing out the mindless use of torture apologia as plot points in the slop everybody writes. i would happily tell all of this directly to the writers of 24’s jack bauer, but those guys aren’t here, so.

you probably won’t be surprised to learn that the majority of the myths surrounding torture are rooted in facistic, reactionary thinking. might makes right is big among people who endorse corporal punishment; the ends justify the means is in play when governments try to excuse the use of t-, ahem, enhanced interrogation tactics. allegedly.

and among a much, much longer laundry list of bullshit i’ve seen spewed – oh, not by shady governments, but by you:

torture as an interrogation method yields reliable information

some forms of torture are more sophisticated than others

torture makes people obedient

torture used as a punishment deters unwanted behavior in others

brainwashing is a thing that is possible (usually through torture)

it’s not torture unless it leaves a physical mark on the body

see to me, it’s fucking easy to rework that scene in your story where torture results in the perpetrator gaining trustworthy intel. fucking easy to reconsider that arc where a character gets rewired by torture into passive obedience. fucking easy, when writing a story, to not accidentally send the message that torture is a tool that works. but hey, allow me to really dig my teeth in.

you drumming up your torturer as “skilled” in the “art” of torture feeds real nicely into the myth that torture works as an interrogation method, here under the condition that you should at least do it properly. is that what you believe? or do just believe that there’s an extra special way to cause extreme physical or emotional destress in a person which, for vague unspecified reasons, superceeds all the other, more amateurish ways one could go about it? the former would make you an direct torture apologist – the latter, a fucking twat. ask yourself why “some torture methods are more sophisticated than others” is an idea that needs to be perpetuated. who benefits from that idea? who would feel really validated by that idea? which government on this green earth of ours, hypothetically speaking, could use this idea as a way to paint their own acts of torture as more cultured or civilized than, say, hypothetically speaking, the torture used by those other nations where the brown people live? allegedly.

alternatively, your little good boy slave fantasy seems to imply that being subjected to torture will make a person obedient. is that what you believe? is it true that might makes right? say, wouldn’t state-sanctioned corporal punishment be justified as a tool to make people obey the law, then? no? okay, hear me out then, cause this is really out there, but. could the idea that violence is a tool that makes people more compliant with the demands of their aggressors, possibly maybe perhaps, be something you only find it acceptable to greenlight as the result decades of war propaganda? naaaaah. fiction isn’t reality, and it means nothing, and victims of torture are weak and malleable and broken, and also what they say can’t be trusted cause they have no real fucking agency anyway. fuck me.

“but elias,” i hear you say, “how am i supposed to write an interesting story that features torture in a way that’s in accordance with scientific consensus on its effectiveness and/or consequences? realism and compelling storytelling are diametrically opposed to one another!”

here’s my take: you just straight up lack creativity. cope and seethe.

if you’re interested in writing about torture, read up on what it is, instead of assuming everything you’ve been told by military-sponsored action movies is true and valid. we’re talking about some pretty extreme facets of human behavior and psychology here, but ones that none the less exist in reality. the bare minimun is to not buy in to the myths and propaganda surrounding it. the next step is to write what it can look like in reality. the big boy galaxy brain move is to write torture in a way that challenges the status quo on how we culturally view torture, and how all these false myths affect victims and perpetrators alike. you just have to fucking think about it.

torture for information doesn’t work – but your perpetrator might be convinced that it does. so instead of going the easy route and proving them right – explore how they're wrong. show torture failing. show your perpetrator’s desperation as they gain nothing. they conceptualize their actions as the lesser of two evils, but whoops, there is no second evil. hows that for a change?

is there such a thing as “torture lite?” does it make any real difference whether it leaves a physical mark behind or not? where do we draw the line between interrogation and torture? is that question not interesting enough for you?

is complying with demands under threat of torture the same as genuine obedience? maybe your victim is forced to pretend in certain ways, through feelings of absolute powerlessness. their survival is pitted against the guilt that comes from following the demands of their perpetrator/s. the sense that they’re betraying themselves, the hatred they feel against their aggressor for making them obey, which is otherwise completely uncharacteristic of them. they’re never reduced to a blank slate, there’s always an internal conflict. what if they reach a point where they have nothing left to lose? real torture makes people more defiant. human beings are amazing at adapting to impossible situations. how is that not a wicked fucking cool thing to explore?

brainwashing isn’t real, but your victim’s loved ones believe that it might be. this means that their attempts to talk about their complex feelings toward the more humane sides of their torturer, or recount moments of a strenuous mutual understanding, are met with vehement denial from the people who are supposed to facilitate their recovery. “don’t talk about him like that, he hurt you.” and a desperation to get people to understand that it’s just not that simple. they’re not just saying it because they’ve been brainwashed – people just aren’t black and white, torturers included. the way they feel compelled by the pressure of their loved ones to just… keep quiet about that aspect of their trauma.

here's a fun fact: not only is torture absolutely useless at everything it sets out to do, but rates of PTSD are equally high among victims and perpetrators. the latter is something called participation-induced post-traumatic stress, or perpetrator trauma. you see it in murderers, too. nobody talks about that. and i get it, it’s a touchy subject, we wouldn’t want to portray torture as something human beings do. but, and here’s my counter-argument: maybe reality is just messy and complicated. and maybe exploring that messy complicated reality in fiction can serve as something interesting and worthwhile. emotionally cathartic. no?

if you read up on torture in psychological studies, regarding the psychology of both victims and perpetrators – and possibly also read some sociological studies about how governments have used a lot of the myths i’ve mentioned about torture to excuse their own actions (allegedly) – you start to get an idea for just how comprehensibly it fucks with people, and how effective that propaganda machine has been. real life torture is not rare. torture will continue to not be rare as long as people believe in the idea that it is useful. so maybe it’s a good idea to approach the subject with a little bit of thought beforehand, you know? we could approach fictional depictions of torture with the same amount due diligence we take with the topic of rape or child abuse, instead of, you know, literally affirming all the myths that justify its use and then brushing off criticism like mine in that aggressively uncritical fiction-isnt-reality,-depiction-isn’t-endorsement,-zero-further-introspection way.

or whatever. maybe im just a big meanie, i must be fun at parties, etc

[texasthoughtsaboutnothing]

The Stranger and my thoughts on where each LCB Sinner is at (Long)

Hey, I actually sat down and read L'etranger, Meursault's source novel. I've got some fucking feelings about it, especially relating it to Limbus Company and what it might mean for his Canto in like 2 years.

Firstly, you should read or listen to this book. It's short, surprisingly punchy, and easy to follow. I (probably) don't have autism but I can absolutely see a read of this where the character does or is neurodivergent in some other way; beyond his relationship and evaluation of social queues and norms he also seems to deal with sensory issues. There are better people than me who should talk about this and I'm probably not adding a lot to the conversation but keeping this reading in my head for the climax added an extra layer of discomfort (intentional discomfort for the benefit of the story's message, I should say) to the whole book. But It's worth experiencing even if you disagree with that reading or have a different one.

Limbus Brainrot/Spoiler stuff from here on in.

There's always the question of where exactly each Sinner is in their story as they're on the bus. Their stories have been reinterpreted and/or jumbled in ways that make it fun to guess, so to go over each Sinner and where they are based on what we know or my theories:

Yi Sang - I'm not gonna front, I don't really get The WIngs, but this seems like a Good End AU for him. He already escaped his "Wife's" control and the sunless room and is now flying again (metaphorically, or maybe literally? i dont know help me).

Faust - Likely in the middle of the part where she's using Mephistopheles' power to do good in the world and prior to her being damned to hell. Side note, she's last to get a Canto and I bet it's not a coincidence that (afaik) she and Dante are the only two with Hell in their stories directly. My long shot call is that Faust is also Beatrice and there will be so much DantexFaust ship art in 2026.

Don Quixote - The biggest enigma. La Sangre de Sancho has gripped the imagination of the fandom and I am no exception. She's next after Heathcliff so we'll get her some time in August at the latest and I can't wait. My best guess is she's currently gallivanting and will be forced home in her Canto, assuming Don is Sancho theory isn't true. Praying her Canto is called The Impossible.

Ryoshu - In Hell Screen, the reason the painter is obsessed with torture is that he can only paint what he has seen and is trying to paint the Buddhist Hell. In his quest for his art he destroys his life and those around him, and ends up committing suicide over it. But there is a villain in the form of the Lord who beyond driving the story by requesting the screen in the first place is guilty of SA and murder. I'm expecting we're post story; the Lord is related to the five fingers, the daughter might be recast as a friend or something, and the sword Ryoshu carries is likely the screen. Nothing revolutionary in my guesses here, but it's either going to be that straight-forward or insanely abstract, where she's the lord and the painter and the daughter and the screen and the sword is the monkey or some shit.

Hong Lu - I have not yet read Dream of a Red Chamber, it's next on the list. Forgive me!

Heathcliff - Oh boy. Like many, I expect he is post-spurning by Catherine and is on his journey for his fortune on the LCB. So, his Canto will be about coming home to a beloved who is with someone else. Yes, the beloved blorbo will suffer for my amusement. Let's go 3 hours Heathmael sex scene!

Ishmael - We now know her story already kinda happened, as many expected, making this a bizarre sequel to Moby Dick. I think it gave PM a lot of room to do whatever they wanted to while still sticking to the themes of the story. Already wrote about what I loved about this and the recontextualizing of Ahab as a whale unto herself (which I don't actually know if it's in the original novel, but it wouldn't surprise me).

Rodion - A weird one. Her inciting incident happened, the murdering of the landlord/pawnbroker, but the unintentional death of the innocent sister was shifted to the entire damn block. So if I had to guess she's in the period after her crime trying to avoid being caught, but no police officer allegory has really been introduced yet. I read Crime and Punishment years ago so I can't say for certain but it feels the most loosely adapted and suffers a tad for being part of the intro. Rodya's story is in no way finished so it's up in the air. Praying for a Petrovich just so people can meet the OG Columbo.

Sinclair - Still need to read Demian, but I have a rough understanding of the plot. Also unfinished in his story, Sinclair has a long way to go to his self-realization. This feels more intentional however, I remember someone made an observation of Cinqlair as representative of his drunken college years where he's popular but unfulfilled, and I think we can extend that to all of his IDs. He seems to have the most potential of all the Sinners, so much so that I wouldn't be surprised if there's a mirror world where he's a Color unto himself. I digress, the point is he's pre Frau Eva (who if she turn's out to be the Purple Tear I will lose my mind) who is also called Beatrice at some point so what's up with that PM?

Outis - Another big mystery, especially as she isn't Odysseus but Outis, a name referencing a particular part of the Odyssey with the Cyclops. I have to imagine she's on the Odyssey, journeying home after the Smoke War (which might have some parallels with the Trojan War beyond the obvious). It's interesting all the Greek myth named Abnormalities are Hospital themed, might be something there but nothing I can parse from my limited knowledge of Greek society and folklore. While she' might be a traitor, I'm thinking she's joined Limbus Company to hide while on her journey; she might be wanted dead by something and is concealing her identity after what happened in the war.

Greg - Again, a character post-story. He was locked in a room, he metamorphized, and... well he's alive? So we've diverged from the source novel, as it's taken the allegorical meanings and made them more literal, but Hermann is still around and a major player so who knows where this will go?

Meursault - I have so many thoughts. Meursault could be anywhere in his story, but I'm going to guess it's one of two places. First guess, we're completely pre story. His Canto opens with him getting a message that Maman died today, or maybe yesterday, he doesn't know. So the whole story plays out over the course of the Canto. But more likely, and my prediction, is that he's currently in "jail" awaiting his execution or acquittal. He has already murdered a man (or done some other crime) and instead of being tried for that, he has been tried and sentenced for his peculiarities of character. Bound in the chains of others, the multitudes have tightened their hold (I'm very clever and not cringe at all).

So I have to wonder what light blinded him, overwhelmed him so much that it led to his crime? The Bright Nights and Dark Days are an obvious choice, and I'm not the first to suggest it. Perhaps he distorted? Anyway, his story ends with him having given up on acquittal and instead hoping for a crowd of people hating him as he approaches the guillotine. I'm super interested in how this will play out in Limbus, especially as he must survive for gameplay purposes.

Also, Meursault is so horny. Like, oh my god. Half of his thoughts are of Marie, specifically of wanting her and all the connotations that contains. He spurns God in the face of a Chaplain, saying that He is worth nothing compared to a single hair on a woman's head. Meursault is not a romantic but not just some horndog either, his desire for sex and women and their bodies feels like an extension of his worldview centered on the immediacy of life and not just debauchery or hedonism. It's a part of the idea life is lived as today, yesterday, and tomorrow, and there is joy and happiness in that simplicity. I feel like this will get cut for Limbus but I hope it isn't, I want Meursault to casually admit he desires every Sinner on the bus carnally (yes the men and NB too, probably just a HC but I do believe that the City is a binormative society based on its already loose relationship to gender identity).

So uh, that's the thoughts so far. Merry Christmas, I guess.

[inalignment]

GET OUR SH*T TOGETHER IN 2024

If you are someone like me and you have been slacking in the self department in 2023 join me and we can do it together! <3

I have been drafting up for the last couple of days some tips and tricks that I feel will help me and hopefully you too :)

Firstly I want to say that glowing up or trying to work for the better version of you can be manageable, by starting small and building the certain habits that you feel will suit you, at first it doesn't even have to cost money or a lot of your time, however it does require a lot of discipline and patience with yourself.

Journaling

How does Journaling help?

Journaling helps you understand your emotional reactions more clearly, and puts you in control of your emotions instead of the other way around.

Meaning that through this you will be able to figure out the things you might feel might be harder for you at the beginning, its important not to rush this progress.

2. Routine

I know everybody often talks about this topic, and often times no one talks about how hard the adjusting period actually is, it is hard to change everything or even a small significant thing around you especially when you've been getting used to not having such an active life or perhaps some of us feel additionally on top of our other lifestyle arrangements to add ourselves on top is too much which takes me to my next point which is time blocking.

3. Time Blocking

Time blocking is the process of breaking your schedule down into individual blocks of time  it can be a great way to increase focus and productivity. I usually do this in 3 steps

Choose in advance what to work on. (I usually do it 2 nights or the night before)

Decide when to tackle priority tasks, this can be done in whichever interval you would like, I usually do it hourly.

Block off a chunk of time on your calendar for each task.

Now that we have the 3 basics down, we can create the routine we want to and implement the goals we wish to achieve:

BODY

In 2024 I certainly and Im sure alot of us have certain gym goals that we would like to achieve, this in turn working out has great benefit not only to your body but also your mental health over time. Even 30 minutes a day will make a big impact especially at the beginning if you are someone like me who hates the gym at the beginning but feel great afterwards, try to start small, a small walk, a small 10 minute YouTube video work out and slowly add more time as more weeks go by.

SKINCARE

One of my biggest goal is definitely towards my skin.

Its important to get out of the habit of not washing or being gentle with your skin, whatever you do one thing i will always say to prioritise is moisturising, MOISTURISE, MOISTURISE!

I have had acne and bad skin since I was a teenager no matter what I've put on my face from retinoids, to all these different creams and acids one thing I will ALWAYS say makes all the difference now and even long term is keeping your skin hydrated and wearing sunscreen, you can even get a 2 in 1 moisturiser and sun cream.

CLOTHES

Basics will be the way to go, if you're looking to investing into a new wardrobe in 2024 one thing my mother and over time i have learned that basics will never run out of fashion its the accessories that you'll need to put an extra time and eye on, a bag, jewellery, coats, sunglasses, focus on certain things that will bring out a staple to your outfit.

BONUS

I am of course adding manifestation and the songs, reprograming your thinking into this as a bonus, this is for the ones that want to either practice this or already do BUT I feel that making your affirmation playlist/ song will work better at time rather than the ones on youtube, don't get me wrong subliminal on YT they do work but if you were to make it yourself it has that extra pull. I made my own about a month ago and it has been working great for me.

Additionally I would also like to mention the importance of paying more attention to the songs and the words you listen to, the things you watch on social media, not everything has to be consumed, either a social media cleanse or trying to change your algorithm I feel is a key when it comes to wanting to grow within one self.

GRATITUDE

When you journal, try to leave a section at the end of the day for the things you feel grateful, i promise, try it for a week, it'll change your life.

Andddd that's it for now! If anyone else has any tips and tricks please drop them in the comments! Lets help each other by also reposting this <333

[starrytowonder]

Success Stories ʕ⁠´⁠•⁠ᴥ⁠•⁠`⁠ʔ

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My posts on success stories seem to do well anyways, so here's so more to help motivate you. :')

Revising that my dog didn't run away: this one is more of a tear jerker. So I have a little Pomeranian dog, and for the time being he was being kept outside because we were doing house remodeling that had wood dust and other chemicals in the air that would be bad for him- so I thought keeping him outside would be safe. My dad decided to let him out of his closed area, and for a while my dog was just having fun running around! I decided to take a nap and just relax for the day since I had to do some writing earlier lol. Anyways, after I woke up, it was already late and around 6-7 pm, my dad walks in and he goes "is the dog in here?" while bursting in my room, and I said "no." and he just kinda scrambled off. My gut feeling just KNEW something was up, and I felt like shit for a good few seconds. I decided to try revising in case of the worst case scenario happening - having some more context, our house is literally next to a busy open street, if our dog got loose the chances of him being run over were extremely high. So anyways, after I "revised" (i simply stated "i have nothing to worry about, my dog is safe and in his house that he has outside), I just persisted. Throughout the day my parents and sisters avoided talking about my "missing" dog because they knew if I heard that he was gone, id have a meltdown. However they are not good at whispering or keeping secrets, so whenever i overheard them talking I would just affirm and remained calm. At around 10pm, my sister comes in my room annoyed ASF and this was the interaction:

Sis: do you know what just happened?

Me: Huh?

Sis: Oh...sorry we didn't tell you, *recaps what I just said*.

Me: the dogs missing?!

Sis: no, my dad went to go check in the dogs house and he was in there! He was inside of a hole where there were light cables ...blah blah blah.

So in conclusion for this story: by persisting that my dog never escaped and was in his house the whole time, he was. Simple.

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Having desired fanfictions written: this is more of a funny one that I do but just noticed that I do it. Whenever I join a fandom and absolutely drool over a character, i always want specific fanfictions written for them that don't exist when I join the fandom. So I'm always like "damn it'd be nice to have a fanfiction that does x" and then usually a few hours later a fanfiction with EXACTLY what I wanted is posted. Granted - they sometimes aren't written that well but regardless...they exist 😏🤞

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Remember how I was struggling with feeling pretty? I started using Slade's Incarnated sub to help. For the first few nights I looped that bad boy on repeat all night, and yeah the results were great! My acne faded and I lost tummy fat, and overall I felt so much prettier. For extra context I had some meltdowns before this (three to be exact) where I looked at myself in the mirror and burst into tears because I felt ugly. Now, after reading Slade's description for the sub, I realized that one of the benefits was sorta listed like: this sub works by also you not needing to overused it- which made me stop using it completely for one night. That night that I stopped using it, I woke up with some of the clearest skin I've had in a while and also longer lashes blah blah blah... basically how Slade said the sub would work. It's been a few days where I've done this and I've noticed that the results from the sub seem to be multiplying very well, I've started to feel even better by the day about how I feel and I know what I wanna look like etc. etc. I also used to have an awful neck hump cus of my shitty posture, and now it's basically gone!! My back so smooth now and my posture is also getting better lol dw.

All in all, ive gotten prettier both internally and externally, and i am so happy about it!

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[mel-1n-hell]

Safe Foods + Diet Foods Masterpost

(I live in the Midwest)

This is a list of a bunch of my personal favorite foods and ingredients to utilize when I’m heavily restricting. I usually love making the highest volume possible out of the lowest cals, but I also sometimes eat smaller amounts of higher calorie/denser foods if I’m, say, wearing something tight or whatever and don’t want to be water bloated. I believe in the importance of being at least mildly sated, and also in the importance of multivitamins+supplements! If you’re restricting, there is a 100% guarantee you are not getting enough vitamins to maintain external functions you really don’t want to start failing on you. I lost a lot of hair when I dropped a fuck ton of weight for the first time because I was 14 at my worst and didn’t understand anything/didn’t care at all about body chemistry, but after I was forced to recover, after my hair began growing back and thickening up, it became very important to me—as did many other aspects of my body that are influenced+enhanced by the ingestion of vitamin supplement (also hair oils like rosemary and castor and almond, leave-in conditioners, good conditioner in general // all of these things will support hair health and maintenance, specifically!) So take your vitamins! Especially capsules, because gummy vitamins are easier for your body to flush out. Plus, a lot of them are just placebos dyed a fun color and rolled in sugar. (The “Now” brand offers very high quality supplements and multivitamins in capsules/pill form)

Also, now that I’m an adult and can buy my own groceries, I have much more access to helpful tools that I wouldn’t have been able to access at 14 or wouldn’t have known enough about to even bother figuring out more. I’m much more educated now and feel almost as if restricting is too easy, too fun. Will it become a problem? Maybe. But until then, and as long as I know we’re all bent on our own destruction anyway, I’ll share what I know, because I wish I would have known about some of these things the first time I decided to dive headlong into the pits of despair (‘:

I can share my favorite combos/meals in another post if anyone would like to see it! First, though, a few general rules I follow, as a sort of context to the masterpost:

1. Caloric intake matters first and foremost. It’s just the simplest way for me to track what I’m eating. (Now don’t do this, but) You could be eating the shittiest, sugariest, most processed diet on the planet but if you’re in a caloric deficit, you’re still going to lose weight.

2. All vegetables are safe. A vegetable is not out here making anyone fat or unhealthy. Certain vegetables, like potatoes, are denser in calories, so it’s just a matter of learning how to use them, but if that scares or triggers you, stay away! For me, I always try to maintain that plants are nothing to be afraid of. I’m neurotic enough without being afraid of the food that literally comes from the earth.

3. All fruits are safe. Moderation is more important to keep in mind when it comes to fruits versus vegetables, because fruit contains more sugar, which means more calories overall. But fruits are my favorite additions to breakfasts, or as sides/snacks later on in the day. It’s a little extra something to crunch/chew on, and all fruit is just so yummy.

4. There’s nothing wrong with a chocolate fix!!! Dark chocolate (the higher the percentage, the better!) has numerous health benefits because it contains a plethora of antioxidants, vitamins, and minerals. It can be high calorie, so enjoy it in moderation, but there is absolutely nothing I love more than taking my time on a lux little square of dark chocolate while I’m reading a book.

5. No eating after 10pm. (I know most people choose an earlier time, but I’m a college student in a stem field who walks from her apartment to campus, so I get home later than traditional dinner time most nights.)

6. No eating before 7am. (8am is preferable.)

7. Eliminate as many sugary, processed carbs as possible. They aren’t really satisfying your body, and consuming these kinds of foods while restricting often leads to uncontrollable bingeing.

8. Eliminate fried foods (unless you figure out an air frier for a cheat night or something).

9. If you’re going to focus on any macros/micros, focus on protein and fiber! Protein is greater sustenance; fiber makes you shit.

10. If you binge, you binge. It happens. It comes with the territory of ED’s. Your body is literally pre-programmed to react this way to starvation because it’s a self-defense mechanism, and for many people, it’s an emotional defense mechanism. Just make your best mental and physical effort to minimize damage. Screwing yourself into the ceiling and just eating more will make you feel cosmically worse. Try to catch yourself before saying “fuck it” and continuing to binge harder, because even you know you don’t really mean that, and you know you’ll hate yourself to the moon for it later. Take a deep breath, name a few of the five senses to ground yourself or whatever, and then walk away. Listen to some music. Chew some gum or start sipping on lemon water. And remember: one pound is 3,500 calories. You would have had to eat that much on top of your basal metabolic rate (how many calories your body burns just existing) to gain just one pound. Water retention can be flushed. Fat cannot be.

11. Drink at least two quarts of water a day.

12. Take your fucking vitamins. xoxo

Okay! Now that I’ve rambled enough, here’s the masterpost (:

🥗 vegetables 🥗

1 cup broccoli, chopped (31 cals)

9-10 baby carrots (30 cals)

2 stalks celery (15 cals)

5 garlic cloves (20 cals) / (great roasted in the oven or as a flavor edition! stuff also makes you shit like crazy depending on how much you eat)

1 cup kale (16 cals)

1 cup spinach (7 cals)

1 cup baby spring mix (7 cals)

1 cup cauliflower, chopped (27 cals)

1 medium/small white or red onion (41 cals)

5 mini yellow/Dino egg potatoes (110 cals)

1 medium/small sweet potato (110 cals)

5 asparagus spears (15 cals)

5 medium white or baby bella mushrooms (20 cals)

1/2 cup sliced water chestnuts (45 cals)

🍑 fruits 🍑

6 mini sweet peppers (60 cals)

1 medium green bell pepper (24 cals)

1 medium red/orange/yellow bell pepper (37 cals)

1/4 avocado (75 cals)

1 medium tomato (22 cals)

1 medium banana (100 cals)

1 medium apple (100 cals)

1 medium grapefruit (104 cals)

1 large orange (87 cals)

1 clementine orange (35 cals)

5 medium strawberries (25 cals)

1 cup blueberries, frozen or fresh (80 cals)

10 raspberries (10 cals)

10 grapes (20-30 cals, depending on size + size variation; one small/medium grape is usually around 2 calories)

1 kiwi (40 cals)

1 cup red cherries, frozen or fresh (80 cals)

1 small champagne mango (80 cals)

1 cup honeydew melon, diced (61 cals)

1 cup watermelon, diced (46 cals)

1 cup pineapple, diced (82 cals)

1 medium cantaloupe (186 cals)

2 medium medjool dates, pitted (110 cals)

🍞 grains 🍞

1/3 cup flour, wheat or white (152 cals // for use in mug cakes, personal pancakes, personal cookies, etc.)

2 slices Healthy Life wheat, honey wheat, or white bread (70 cals)

1 Country Hearth light bun (80 cals)

1 mini bagel (100-125 cals, depending on flavor+brand)

1 bagel thin (110 cals)

1/3 cup rolled or quick oats, dry (100 cals)

1 cup plain Cheerios (100 cals // 140 cals for honey nut)

1/2 cup rice, brown or white (108 cals, brown; 102 cals, white)

1 “Ole” X-Treme Wellness wrap, tomato basil, spinach, or traditional (50 cals)

🍗 meats 🍗

3 oz (about the size of your palm) boneless, skinless chicken breast, cooked (120 cals)

5 medium chicken fajita strips, frozen (110 cals)

2.5 Simple Truth Organic homestyle chicken tenders (170 cals)

1/2 can Good & Gather chunk chicken, canned in water (50 cals)

1 can Chunk Lite Tuna (90 cals)

11 medium Member’s Mark cooked shrimp (60 cals)

1 tilapia fillet (112 cals)

4-6 pieces thin-sliced deli ham or roast beef (60-70 cals, depending on brand)

4-6 pieces thin-sliced deli chicken or turkey (50-60 cals, depending on brand)

🧀 dairy / imitation dairy and animal products 🧀

1 medium egg (66 cals // 78 cals for large)

1 tbsp I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter, light buttery spread (35 cals)

1 tbsp Blue Bonnet, light buttery spread (40 cals)

1 tbsp Blue Bonnet, buttery stick (60 cals)

1 slice Kroger fat-free American cheese slices (30 cals)

1 stick Sargento Light mozzarella string cheese (45 cals)

1/4 cup shredded fat-free mozzarella cheese (45 cals)

1 slice Sargento Ultra Thin cheese, Swiss, provolone, pepper-Jack, sharp cheddar, or Colby-Jack (40-45 cals)

1 cup unsweetened almond milk, vanilla or original (30 cals)

1 cup Silk unsweetened cashew milk, vanilla or original (25 cals)

1 cup Silk unsweetened coconut milk (40 cals)

1 cup Almond Breeze unsweetened chocolate almond milk (40 cals)

2 tbsp sugar-free International Delight or Kroger coffee creamer (30-40 cals, depending on flavor and flavor’s brand)

1 Kroger Carbmaster Yogurt, any flavor (60-80 cals, depending)

1/2 pint Favorite Day low calorie protein ice cream, Mint Cookies n’ Cream (180 cals)

1/2 pint Favorite Day low calorie protein ice cream, Cookie Dough or Mocha Coldbrew Coffee (185 cals)

1/2 pint Favorite Day low calorie protein ice cream, Chocolate Peanut Butter or Mini Donut (190 cals)

1/2 pint Favorite Day low calorie protein ice cream, Caramel Maple Bourbon Pecan Pie (205 cals)

additional: any protein ice cream brand is a great dessert choice and so unironically delicious! I just listed Target’s because it’s cheapest, cost-wise, but Halo Top, Frozen Farmer, Enlightened, etc. -- they all market low calorie ice creams for anywhere between 270-470 cals per pint, depending on which flavor and brand.

🍚💰 god-send diet foods 💰🍚

1 bag shirataki noodles (20 cals)

1 cup shirataki konjac rice (30 cals)

1 pint Frozen Farmer sorbet, peach, strawberry, honeydew, watermelon, or mango (70 cals)

1 pint Frozen Farmer sorbet, strawberry lemonade (80 cals)

1 pint Frozen Farmer sorbet, raspberry (90 cals)

Walden Farms syrups, chocolate, caramel, pancake, maple walnut, strawberry, blueberry, etc . (0 cals)

Walden Farms dressings and sauces, Ranch, Buffalo Ranch, Caesar, Thousand Island, Chipotle Ranch, Bacon Ranch, Creamy Bacon, Italian, French, Honey Dijon, Balsamic Vinaigrette, Spicy Buffalo Vinaigrette, Super Fruits Balsamic Vinaigrette, Raspberry Vinaigrette, etc. etc. etc. (0 cals; there are literally endless flavors and all of them are zero calories. No joke. Look it up, order some on Amazon, Kroger and Walmart carry the most popular flavors)

Walden Farms coffee creamers, vanilla, mocha, peppermint, caramel, hazelnut, etc. etc. (0 cals; these might need to be ordered on their website or on Amazon)

Diet Soda, any flavor or brand (0 cals, obv)

2 tbsp Great Value peanut butter powder (50 cals // PB Fit = 60 cals per 2 tbsp)

Stevia or erythritol sweeteners (0 cals)

PICKLES!!!!!!!! (0 cals)

🥨 munchies 🥨

1 cup SmartFood white cheddar popcorn (70 cals // moderation)

1 cup Skinny Pop popcorn (39 cals // moderation)

18 mini twists, Rold Gold fat-free pretzels (110 cals // moderation)

23 twists, Clancy’s Everything-Pretzel Slims (110 cals // moderation)

3 Twizzlers (100 cals // moderation)

2 Zachary’s Thin Mints, mini dark chocolate peppermint patties (65 cals // moderation)

1 Brach’s Candy Cane (50 cals)

2 Hot Cocoa Kisses (36 cals)

2 Cherry Cordial Kisses (40 cals)

1 square 85% Lindt dark chocolate (58 cals // moderation)

1 X-Treme Wellness wrap, cut into 8 slices and salted+baked into tortilla chips, with 1/4 cup salsa (75 cals) or 2 tbsp Good & Gather queso blanco dip / Tostitos salsa con queso dip (90 cals // moderation)

1 slice Healthy Life bread, toasted and with 2 tsp I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter! buttery spread, garlic+onion powder, and some salt (60 cals) OR toasted and with 1 slice Kroger fat-free American cheese, melted (65 cals)

1/2 medium banana or apple with 1 tbsp PB Fit powder + 2 tbsp Walden Farm’s pancake syrup for PB drizzle (80 cals // other sugar-free syrups add 5-15 cals, ex. Maple Grove [5], Log Cabin [10], Kroger brand [15], etc.)

2 slices deli rotisserie chicken / turkey, thin-sliced, spread w 1 tbsp Kroger fat-free cream cheese, rolled around 1 baby dill pickle (40 cals // without cream cheese, 25 cals // don’t knock it till u try it😒😒unless u just don’t like pickles lol)

10 strawberries and Walden Farm’s chocolate syrup (50 cals)

1 sugar-free Jell-O cup (10 cals)

1 sugar-free pudding cup (60 cals)

🧂🥫 other sauces / dips / condiments / ingredients 🥫🧂

Mustard, yellow, Dijon, or spicy brown (5-10 cals per tsp, depending on brand)

Miracle Whip Lite (20 cals per tbsp)

Stubb’s Sugar-Free Smokehouse BBQ sauce (10 cals per 2 tbsp)

Prego Marinara No Sugar Added (60 cals per 1/2 cup)

Chi-Chi’s Salsa (40 cals per 1/2 cup)

Tostitos Salsa Con Queso dip (40 cals per 2 tbsp)

Good & Gather Queso Blanco dip (40 cals per 2 tbsp)

Any sugar-free or fat-free dressing!! Just check labels.

Maple Grove sugar-free maple syrup (5 cals per 2 tbsp)

Cocoa powder (10-20 cals per tbsp, depending on brand and purity of cocoa)

Dark spices are said to speed up the metabolism, and they also allow your brain and stomach to feel more sated after eating, so use lots of seasonings! Plus, flavor :P (chili powder, paprika, cayenne, red pepper flakes, cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, cloves, etc.)

I hope you all found this post to be useful in some way, or maybe inspiring or motivating! If anyone has anything they’d like to add, don’t hesitate to reblog with your own list of favs. I plan on adding to this if I find anything new or remember something I might’ve glossed over when writing it.

That’s all for now. Stay hydrated and take your vitamins angels❣️

[ovaruling]

@non-suspiciousname @junipercastor i’m not a dietician or doctor disclaimer disclaimer if you have preexisting conditions this may not be for you disclaimer disclaimer i cannot account for every human experience disclaimer disclaimer BUT the easiest way to do this is to first learn what “high fiber foods” means.

and before i begin, here’s how much fiber we more or less need via a helpful Harvard health article.

so, to recap: for women—the ones who matter to me—that’s 25g for adult women who are 50 and under. women 50 and over, that’s 21g.

and i included the extra paragraph about Metamucil etc bc that is important to note. a lot of people do think they’re getting quality daily fiber in these powders.

here’s a helpful article abt the differences between soluble and insoluble fiber. both are important in their own ways!

and just so we’re clear on the benefits of upping your fiber intake:

so!

i recommend a quick google to see the fiber content per serving of a variety of foods that i don’t have time condense here. but, like, beans are a really inexpensive way to do this (add some rice to it and you have a complete muscle-lovin’ protein btw! all the essential amino acids are covered when you combine rice and beans 🫶). beans and legumes are incredibly rich in fiber, and they’re budget-friendly, shelf-stable, and easy to make and easy to incorporate into infinite delicious possible dishes.

but your fiber can be gotten from so many different sources! (my data here is approximate from individual checking. pls allow 1-2g of fiber for margin of error in case i mistype!)

for fruits: 1 cup of blackberries OR raspberries has 8g of fiber!!!!! 1 medium apple has around 4-5g of fiber. an average banana or a serving of strawberries have 3g of fiber. an average avocado has 10g of fiber. and so forth

for grains: steel-cut oats have 5g of fiber per 1/4 cup uncooked (oats are generally rich in fiber anyway, but steel cut in particular). a slice of whole grain bread should have around 3g fiber. brown rice contains 3.5g fiber for every cooked cup. one cup of cooked quinoa (which is also a complete protein!) contains 5g of fiber. bran is almost 15g per one cup serving.

if you’ve got access to chia seeds, a 1oz serving provides 10g fiber. here’s a yummy super easy recipe for peanut butter chia pudding!!!

nuts and seeds provide a lot of fiber too. 1oz of walnuts contains nearly 2g fiber! 1oz of almonds contains 3.5g fiber. peanuts contain 2.5g fiber for 1oz. sunflower seeds are 12g per 1 cup serving (though that’s a lot of them to eat—1/4 a cup would be closer to 3g)

and my fave prunes are 12g per one cup serving. again, that’s a lot of them to eat. 1/4 of that would be 3g.

beans/legumes are king for fiber. 1 cup of cooked black beans contains 15g of fiber. 1 cup of navy beans contains around 19g of fiber. 1 cup of kidney beans contains 11g of fiber.

split peas are i think around 8g per cup when cooked? cooked broccoli is around 5g. corn is around 4g.

i could go on but i’m literally hooked up to an IV for medication rn so i’m one-handed lol i apologize for how cramped this is

but here’s a great list from the Mayo Clinic of high fiber foods and another list of 40 foods from a women’s health mag and also another from healthline, which also has a handy chart for fiber requirements for more specific age groups based on sex

and yes, there are also high-fiber cereals, but beware of the much-touted and rightly-feared ingredient of psyllium husk. it’s more or less used as a laxative and can be outright dangerous for your digestive system and is very painful if not consumed in militant moderation. ask me how i know lol. please please be careful of psyllium husk. like, for real. just stay away from it altogether imo.

sorry this is a lot of discombobulated info, but again i’m one handed at the moment. but hopefully that helps a bit! fiber is linked to longevity and good colon health and that’s what i want for women forever

EDIT: go slow with this! if you’re not used to the recommended daily intake, you will need to gradually work up to this so as not to upset your gastrointestinal system. you may otherwise find yourself in discomfort. GO SLOW. add fiber-rich foods in small portions over time to allow your body to adjust. it is well worth the patience—but don’t overload your system by eating a ton of prunes and thinking you’re doing yourself any good that way. introduce gently and in moderation until you feel comfortable with how it makes your digestion feel!

[jellyfishloveletterghosts]

My Harringrove Au List N-Z

PART 1 A-M

Necromancer

Baby Did You Come Back Wrong - Steve brings Billy back and he needs more than a burger and fries to survive. 

I’d Sell My Soul to a Devil - Steve sacrifices himself to save Billy at Starcourt. Billy makes a promise to get him back, it's going to take him a while but he plans to keep that promise. Even if he has to make a deal with a demon to do it. Even if the price isn't right.

Necromancin Dancin - Billy died at Starcout, he doesn't stay that way for long.

Sear Through Me - Billy is an asshole with magic, the upside down latches onto him, and he is an unwilling puppet. When he faces the mind flayer at Starcourt he knows he is going to die. Steve doesn't let him.

You Can’t Kill Love - Chrissy dies and Eddie goes to Steve looking to bring her back.

Omegaverse

Beauty and The Beast - Mr. Harrington takes a rose and instead of paying the price the beast of the castle demands himself, he sends his son in his stead. Billy is not sure what to do with an omega who not only does not cower away from him like everyone else but also seems to think he is a slob and keeps trying his patience. (Magic and Royalty)

Benefits of Surviving - Billy finds Steve at the gate when the demobats attack.It would be a happier affair if they weren't trapped and Steve wasn't on the brink of a heat.

Come On Alpha - Steve is tired of waiting for Billy to make a move, so he takes matters into his own hands.

Everything I do Is To Bring Me Closer To You - Billy has a long way to go before he can make his dream of marrying Steve a reality. (Royalty and Magic)

Find Comfort In Me - Billy needs a comfort omega after surviving Starcourt. Steve is absolutely not who he expected Hopper to hire. He didn’t even know Steve was an omega.

First Impression - Alpha Billy meeting Steve for the first time at Tina's party.

Flirt Like A Bird - Billy wants to woo Steve, he tries a couple of options that haven't gone well. He tries a new tactic.

Giants Blood - Highborn Omega Steve finally realizing Alpha wildling Billy has been courting him. 

Hay In Your Hair, Mud On My Boots (Series) - Loose Yellowstone inspired au

Need An Alpha To Pop A Knot - Steve's an alpha who's never popped a knot, not until Billy comes along.

Omegas Like Us Have To Stick Together - Steve presents at the mall and bites and cries when any alpha or beta gets to close. Luckily Billy shows up more than willing to help when the end game is getting to keep Steve.

Smoke - Billy is ditching class for a smoke break when Steve comes along.

Track In A Crowd - Billy and Steve find each other by scent at a party. (Model Steve/Musician Billy)

You’re My Bitch - Omega Billy fucking alpha Steve and the one time he finally lets Steve knot him.

You’re Extra Special, Something Else - Billy and Max escape Neil and move to Hawkins, where Billy sets his sights on Steve Harrington.

Party Clown

Clown Shoe (Series) - Billy gets a job as a party clown, Steve has some mixed feeling about it but mostly he’s just horny.

Pirates

Part 1 and 2 - A pirates of the Caribbean/ Princess Bride mash up

Professional Athlete

Thaw the Ice - Steve needs a new Coach. Billy is here for the job.

Reanimated

You Will Be Made New Again - Jonathan and Tommy succeed in brining Billy back from the dead, Steve their exasperated neighbor is the only thing that can get him to cooperate. AKA A Frankenstein's monster Billy fic. (Collage/University Au)

Royalty 

Dragons Are Hoarders - The kingdom of Harrington offers up anything in the treasury for the return of their lost heir. Billy just so happens to need something they have in their possession. Things of course do not go to plan. (Magic)

The Jester and His King - King Steve getting railed by his jester. 

Pretty Fool (Series) - Snapshots from King Billy and Jester Steve’s exploits around the castle. 

Roommates 

And They Were Roommates - Steve and Billy are roommates, Billy is less than pleased when Steve gets a boyfriend.

Avoidance Techniques - Billy keeps getting drunk at frat parties, and Steve is his roommate who keeps getting called to pick him up. (College/University Au)

The Case of The Missing Clothes - Steve's clothes have been going missing, he finally finds where they've all been going. (College/University Au)

Fill That Hole in Your Life - Pandemic/Quarantine Au - Billy and Steve figure some stuff out during the pandemic when all they have is each other for company. 

Scarecrow

Have Some Fun - Steve gets drunk and wanders into Billy's corn maze.

Sea Creature

A Bargain - Steve is a lonely merman who seeks out the sea witch to help him find love.

Salt Skin - Friends don’t plan and construct elaborate surprises that take weeks to prepare and involve a contractor, no that’s beyond friend behavior and edging dangerously close to courting behavior. Except Steve had gone and hurtled right over that line and presents Billy with a gift so fantastic he can no longer ignore his feelings. 

The Whale and The Danio - Steve loses his school, and Billy finds him.

Secret Relationship

The Hard Stuff - When Steve comes over and follows Billy to his bedroom, Tommy over hears them fucking and misunderstands what is going on. 

Serial Killers 

Bloody Summer (Series) - Billy meets Steve at summer camp where the counselors keep dropping like flies. 

Sex Worker

Billy with a Cane - Billy never expected to find Steve working in a strip club.

Camboy/Farmer Steve - Billy comes to help Max with her form and runs into his favorite camboy.

December To New Years - Camboy Steve and his budding relationship with Billy.

Roommates with Pornstar Billy - As a joke Billy gets Steve a subscription to the site he works for. If he’s hoping Steve watches his videos well that’s his business. 

Virgin Territory - Steve accidentally admits to knowing about Billy's cam work, things go a lot better than he ever thought they would.

Soulmates

Let Me Take Your Pain - Billy and Steve are soulmates, they don't find that out till they fight.

Love at First Fight - Love at first sight is bullshit as far as Steve is concerned, he has given up on it. 

Space

Frozen Beauty? - Billy sees Steve cryo frozen for the first time when he’s eight, the older he gets the more obsessed he becomes until he finally has his boy.

WSwaBEwaB - Bounty hunter Billy takes a job that leads him to cyborg Steve.

Star Wars

Come To The Dark Side - Steve and Billy are separated by the Jedi. Billy joins the Sith as a way to find his way back to Steve and get some revenge on those who would keep them apart.

Step Brothers

Step Brothers - Steve and Billy’s mom get together, that doesn’t stop their relationship. 

Suggardaddy 

Hardhat Daddy - Steve works at a hardware store and Billy is a rich contractor. 

Sugar Sugar (Series) - Years after Starcourt a rich and successful Billy runs into a struggling Steve. Billy just wants to take care of him.

Trans

All I Want For Christmas - Billy makes a request for Christmas.

Transmasc alpha Billy - story idea for how he ends up in Hawkins and meets Steve. (omegaverse)

Transmasc Billy/ Nonbinary Steve -  Just some hc’s for them.

Tramsmasc Billy rocking Steve’s world - Thinking about trans masc Billy rocking Steve’s world and blowing his back out with his monster strap.

Vampires

The Calling - Steve gets caught by the demodogs in the tunnels, torn to shreds. He’s on the cusp of dying, no way around that but Billy makes sure he wakes up again. 

Vampire/Werewolf

Bite - The fight at the Byers doesn't happen but Steve still finds his back against the dirt.

Sink Your Teeth In - Billy isn’t going to let Steve starve.

Werewolf

Shifting Pleasures - Billy takes things out of hand one night. Steve might have fun but that doesn't mean Billy isn't in trouble for not asking first.

Time Travel

If I Could Turn Back Time - When they find themselves in the past Steve is willing to risk the future they know if it means a chance to save Billy.

Zombie

Reunited - Steve and Billy reuniting during a zombie apocalypse.

[neverchecking]

Thank you for giving me permission to let me send any idea I get ^u^ your list has given me more ideas and thoughts 🩵 and it has helped play into a specific one ✨ so I am here to share one that had been at the forefront of my mind that I need to share with you and your amazing brain

Btw will be using fem pronouns cause it’s a bit easier for me to write this all out, but you don’t have to ^u^

I genuinely can’t stop thinking of all the possibilities that could arise from the chain— which now includes Cal and Sage whenever I talk about the chain as a whole, they deserve all the love 🩵— knowing that their goddess has a darker side. Before I get into that, will add that personally, I feel like y/n would never abuse that power, maybe cause she has some morals; never targeting kids ofc, but also those that flirt with her but back down immediately upon seeing her boys? Those people are fine, because they’re respectful at the very least— and don’t have the audacity to think they could ever measure up to even a fraction of her perfect boys. But others that keep pushing? Target acquired. But also I imagine she doesn’t want to abuse her power cause she doesn’t want to be even remotely close to Hylia or even Zelda; she actually genuinely loves and cares about her boys, and they already do so much for her, she would never want them to feel like she’s using them. Which, I mean to be fair, if we’re being technical, she kinda is using them, but it’s for her and her boys benefit ✨ she’s just giving them permission to deal with the scum of the earth

Anyway, back to the number one thought at the forefront of my mind, me thinks, as a treat for the boys since you mentioned that they find it hot as hell, them getting to witness their goddess as she chooses her next victim ✨

Before I do that, I wanna bring up some things you wrote, like from Sage figuring out reader knew what they were doing; “They enjoyed teasing the scum of the Earth, dangling their own supple body in front of them like a treat on a stick only to set their guard dog on them the second they overstepped.” This. This imagery right here is scrumptious. 10000/10 delicious. It sparked this idea in the first place. But also the fact that it’s not just one guard dog, it’s eleven guard dogs at the ready ✨ because even when the chain know the truth, that reader knows about their darker impulses and even encourages it, she still doesn’t stop goading those people into crossing a line so her boys can deal with them— at least, she won’t unless it genuinely upsets her boys, cause while she enjoys riling up the chain and seeing how possessive they can be, she doesn’t want to actually make them upset if they really don’t like it.

Which actually plays into another thing you wrote for the list— thank you for the list 🩵— specifically on Twilight’s part; “He's just a simple country boy who was raised in a village where everyone was honest, so he can only think the same of everyone, especially his Goddess, until proven otherwise.” Which again, this. I love this— I love everything you write but this had me going “awww” out loud, he’s so precious 🩵 but also this plays into the whole thing with reader not wanting to upset her boys. If the chain doesn’t actually like that she uses her body in a way that goads those scum, she’ll respect their wishes and just straight up tell them. Especially since well, she has nothing to hide if her boys know the truth, cause I feel like y/n— in an effort to not be in any way, shape, or form like Hylia or Zelda— would be honest with them about it. Literally straight up about who’s on her shit list.

And if we bring up the point system, the higher on her shit list, the more points the chain gets for dealing with them ✨ like if someone was flirting with her and wouldn’t back down? On her shit list but not very high up there, so extra points if the chain deals with them quickly. Someone saying some insulting shit about her boys?? Higher up on her shit list, extra points if the one who was getting insulted dealt with the person. Someone who insults her boys, flirts with her, and doesn’t back down???? The highest you could ever be on her shit list, extra points if they make it a painful death ✨ no one insults her perfect boys and gets away with it

So imagine this, the chain and reader at one of their castle towns, and y/n overhearing from one of the men they pass making a snide comment about that Hyrule’s Link and the chain getting to witness for the first time the way their goddess’s sweet smile tightens just the slightest bit, how her kind eyes shift into one that craves bloodshed but flickers back into that kind look so quickly, but now her eyes and smile hold something much sharper— except now she’s not directing that smile to them, she’s looking at the man that had the audacity to ever say anything about her boys. Now this is where the idea splits into two routes, cause I can’t be 100% sure whether or not the chain would want her to stop trying to goad the scum of the earth, so I shall give you both versions ✨

If the chain truly doesn’t mind, they would get to witness it with new eyes how their goddess expertly plays into the innocent role, how she maybe pretends to be lost or something and just uses her body in a way that gets her the exact reaction she wants from the man. Just like how you said, she dangled her body in front the man like a treat on a stick, just waiting for the man to overstep, and once he does, whether the chain pull their goddess away or she just drifts back to them, she’s content now that she’s gotten what she wanted, which is a target painted on that man. And she patiently awaits for her boys to deal with him like she knows they will.

Is the chain does mind, she gets closer to the Link of the Hyrule they were in, and since she would be honest, she would ask him if they knew that man, if he was of importance, and if anyone would notice if he just, disappeared. Never to be found again. Whether she has to be outright honest and bluntly asks them to deal with the man, or if that’s enough of a hint for them to have a target painted on the man, she’ll make sure they know exactly who she wants them to deal with.

Regardless of the route, the one(s) that deal with the man get lots of affection after they’ve dealt with the scum ✨

— 🫐 anon

🫐anon. Listen here-

Everything you just wrote up there?

I AM (s)CREAMING.

THERE IS SO MUCH TO GO OVER AND IM SO READY-

First, you didn't need permission lovely! I'm more than happy to read what you guys send and start a conversation. I feel like I've made some great friends here with all of you guys! And I'm so ready to hear all of your ideas. Because your brain=just as amazing man

Now, I love including Cal and Sage because those two when with Wild are such a delicious trio. Full of resentment and bubbling anger just waiting to boil over? Drives me nuts. There is just so much potential there and I wanna love them all because it's what they deserve.

I totally like that entire idea of Reader not abusing their power. I imagine they view themselves as a benevolent being rather than a strictly Godly one. Like you said, kids are out of the question. People who respect their boundaries and understand that they could never measure up to the deities that are their boys are imposing on another person's relationship (Whether it's poly, a cult, etc., etc.) are also safe. It's the ones who don't respect that line. Who cross it and view Reader as nothing more than a piece of meat. Who want nothing more than a quick lay. Those are people who Reader deems as expendable. Because, really, Hyrule would be a better place without them in it.

And they would have to really push it. Reader is only instigating it if they push. From then, it's just baiting the boys into seeing it. Because you're right. She doesn't want to be at all like Zelda- or Golden three forbid, Hylia. They did nothing but use and abuse her perfect companions, with little to no second though to the aftermath. While, yes, she is also using them to a degree, it's more of a trade. She'll give them companionship and someone to lean on rather than them relying on no one but themselves.

When it comes to them knowing their Goddess has a darker side (Should we give this an AU name? I feel like we should-), it absolute riles them up.

🫐anon. Lemme let you in on a lil' secret- When writing that line, I was literally giggling to myself like a whole ass school girl. Like I was damn proud of that line so thank you for noticing.

Imagine having eleven guards dogs, prowling about, waiting to attack first and ask questions later. All their waiting for is the command. If it does genuinely upset her boys, she can definitely step back.

I'm glad you like the list so much! It was fun to figure out! Yeah, honesty is a huge difference between Reader and Hylia/Zelda. They never came outright with anything, lest it be a life or death situation. They've all had issues like this with their Zeldas, who simply didn't tell them something until they were facing down death itself. She'll straight up be like, hey, this happened, deal with how you want to, or, better yet, I'm dealing with it, i'll be back in a few minutes.

Now. A point system.

🫐anon. Your genius knows no bounds.

Now, imagine, if you will, someone not only insults her boys, and flirts without backing down, but dares to try and touch whats not theirs. That is the absolute pinnacle of fuckery.

I imagine this would happen in like Warrior's Hyrule because, let's face it, his is the messiest. Most people, half of them absolutely hate Link for starting a war, the other half want him in their bed, very little in between. And their ballsy because who's gonna stop them? Those jokes they call knights? Yeah, right.

Now, option A)

The man has already pushed. He pushed a fragile dam and it snapped, now he's left to deal with the anticipated torrent. She's sauntering over to him, fluttering her lashes and puckering her lips, doing all of the cheesy moves to get what she wants. And it works. Once he's hooked, his fate is seal. Because the boys are not the one to truly fear. No, Reader is. She makes the calls. She'll determine if you are worthy of their time. If not, if you've failed her test before it even begins?

Count your hours because they are fleeting and they are fleeting fast.

Option B)

Let's say this is Warriors Hyrule, she'll go to him on how to deal with this directly. Depending on the Hyrule, she'll let that Link lead the way. Some, like Wars, require some tact and poise when it comes to dealing with unwanted pests. With populations as heavy as they are, there are some hurdles they have to jump to make sure its done properly. They can't be sloppy, or they'll get caught. If it's someone like Hyrule's or, hell, even Sage's Hyrules, they can get as sloppy as they want as long as they remain out of sight.

You bet your ass that they are absolutely soaking up all the attention bestowed upon them for a job well done. Anything for their Goddess.

[icannotgetoverbirds]

Email template!

So your local mall has a Papa John's inside, or maybe there's a Domino's operation out of the nearest Walmart. But wait! Those are both being targeted by the BDS boycott list at the moment! Why should you care if you're not getting food from them?

Because, my friends, you can also stop others from getting food from them as well.

Sure, you could arrange a sit-in (highly recommended), but maybe you're just too busy to do something like that. Capitalism, right?

Are you too busy to send one extra email per day using a template? If you answered yes, I wish you the best of luck avoiding burnout. You'll need it.

If you answered no, boy have I got the direct action for you!

So you're gonna want to find a company that's partnered with a BDS boycott target

The restaurants in the bottom right are probably your best bet, but by all means feel free to translate this to work for other targets. Just be sure to share so that others can get in on the fun!

Find their contact information, preferably an email. Here's what you're gonna send them.

"Hi there! I am extremely disappointed to see that you are still partnered with (bds boycott target), as they are currently sponsoring/profiting from an ongoing genocide in Palestine. I'd hate to see (target partner that you are emailing) on the wrong side of history, especially when it's clearly repeating itself. Might I suggest a partnership with (non-targeted non-partnered competitor of previously mentioned bds boycott target) instead? Their (product - specifics optional) is far better, anyways. (optional bonus: list some benefits of choosing the competition!) Thank you for your time. I look forward to seeing (partner) back on the correct side of history where it belongs. Cheers, Your name/pseudonym (Bonus: Add a ps full of evidence of the genocide!)"

All you have to do is find a partner of said target (for instance, the aforementioned walmart location with a bds boycott target operating inside), track down their email or contact page, fill in the blanks accordingly, and send your complaint their way.

If you can send one email per day, fantastic. If you can send more, even better. I would, again, highly recommend arranging a sit-in and other kinds of physical direct action. Remember, do NOT harass the workers.

For those of you working at bds targeted locations, i would highly recommend that you look for some other form of employment. I know it's a shit job market out there, but the sooner you start looking the more likely it is you'll be able to find something. This is especially true if you are in a location that is partnered with a non-targeted corporation.

I have no hopes of this email campaign getting big enough on its own to make significant change, certainly not if I and my friends are the only ones participating, but I have to do something or else this sense of helplessness will eat away at me. One more voice amplifying the message of the victims and survivors can only help.

Please reblog! If enough people get in on this, we could make these corpirations hemorrhage out more money! I know y'all like to see them get their asses whooped.

[wonderinc-sonic]

🔄What would you change about them, if anything?

🐜 What's your smallest headcanon for them?

For Team Dark! (And if you can make the headcanon somehow Omega-centric, that would be wonderful, because I am very predictable.)

Heyyylo my friend! Apologies for delay, I have been away on holiday and had a bit of a social media break, what have I missed?

This is from this ask list I made to be applicable to many dynamics.

🔄 What would I change about them?

TRICKY. Very hard. I'd like to go away and think about it, but this is an ask, and you can't save them as drafts properly on mobile.

I think for the whole Team dynamic, I would possibly not have had them be the Serious Team. I was just ruminating on the comics, as well as some of the racing type games, and how Team Dark often only gets involved when there's a big ol' crisis, or they're dragged in. I get why they do this, and it's probably saved them from being mucked about with too much, but I think it reduces some of their more fun aspects, and also makes it seem like they only exist to work. I believe they have hobbies!

Specific to each member though:

Shadow's has had arcs, but not consistent characterisation over the games. I don't mind this loads - hell, I'm a guy who has good days and bad days, and they can be night and day - but every time we see him someone (often Sonic) has a line like 'heh, typical Shadow' and I'm just like ❔️. So, I guess, one throwaway line about Shadow being in 'one of his moods', and then him getting extra stroppy about it, would suit me well.

Rouge is most linked to the Team one, but I need her to be bad sometimes. I get that she is now a mainstay of the cast and solidly in the good team, two things maybe not originally planned for her character, but the recent characterisation of her as a sassy and tricksy but ultimately well intentioned hero tires me. I think its also where some of this mothering characterisation comes from in the fandom. Let her be three steps ahead in the wrong direction for once. Let her be the cause of a problem for everyone else and too stubborn/ greedy to help out. Let her be prideful and spiteful and take revenge when she shouldn't. It's not that she's out of character now, she just lacks the breadth she used to have.

Omega could do with some variety in who he interacts with and where he goes. I would like to know how Omega deals with a complex problem when he's on his own or without his team to do the peopling for him. I hesitate, because I don't want him to come across meatheaded (pun intended) or get softened, but if done well could be fab.

🐜 Small Headcanon for Team Dark:

I answered one of these, so I'll give another one centering around Omega, and some fic I've been lazy-writing when I get the time: he doesn't like being in cars, boats, planes or any mode of transport unless he controls it. It messes with his sensory inputs to be changing locations without taking an action, a bit like car sickness, and it makes him cranky. So, he can be really badly behaved in car journeys, and it can come about quite suddenly. The first time he liked it was in TSR when he got to pilot the vehicle himself, and it gave Rouge and Shadow the terrifying idea that it might benefit them if he had a driving license, even though it could be so much worse for everyone else. At least you'd know if Omega crashed into the back of your car at a light, it was absolutely not an accident but a calculated demonstration of his opinion of you!

Thanks so much for the ask measly! Still happy to do these, I like this list and haven't thought of anything missing just yet!

[zahmbie]

If you’re comfortable can you write fluff and comfort for Evan and habit with a reader who has FND or seizures? Struggling atm and need some comfort - 🌸 anon

Evan and HABIT comforting a reader who gets seizures

Note: This one took a little longer than I hoped because unlike the other things I’ve written so far, I have no experience with seizures! I’ve been researching them cause I didn’t want to get anything wrong, but I’m basing a few points in here around stuff I read online. Please let me know if I got anything wrong and I’ll be more than happy to fix them! And I hope you feel better soon anon <3

(No content warnings I know of)

Evan

Evan gets a little panicky when he learns you get seizures. You tell him that you’ve been living with them for longer than you’ve known him, but he loves you so he’s going to be a little worried. Just give him some instructions on what to do in the event of a seizure and he’ll do literally everything in his power to help you. He also asks Jeff for any advice on seizures, his closest friend works in a hospital, Jeffs gotta know something right?

Jeff told him that stresses can be a trigger and healthy habits can help with some seizures and Evan is on it. He’s offered to teach you yoga if you wanna try and use it to destress, and he’s very good at making sure you’re always drinking water and keeping a good sleep schedule. 

He struggles a little with some of the things he has to remember, but he’s never once forgotten about any meds you need to take. He’s not gonna baby you about it or anything but he’ll give you a gentle reminder about taking your pills if you need it.

Evan’s by far the best cuddler out of the EMH group, and the best at comforting by extension. He’s gotten his bedroom set up with snacks and drinks, he’s got your favorite CD playing, and he dug a bunch of extra pillows out of his closet to make his bed as soft as it could be. He’ll stay next to you as long as you need him- he’s honestly considering calling out sick to work the next day if you want him to stay with you for longer- talking to you about anything that comes to your minds. Any shows or books you like, some new xbox game he got, how work or school’s going, how filming EMH has been. There’s no place he’d rather be than next to you.

HABIT

Adding to my list of “things HABIT can sense”: seizures. He’s like a medical support dog, he can just smell it coming before you can feel it.

You two are just hanging out, playing with the cat, and he suddenly sits up straight, looking alert. Before you can ask him what’s wrong he goes into some grounding stuff. He’s good with distractions and decent asking questions to help you with reorienting. Some reorienting questions just don’t work great with him. “Where are you” and “what year is it” don’t have clear answers when you’re hanging out in HABITs weird little hell dimension.

Very bad at reminding you to take your meds but he still wants to help, if you didn’t have a pill case before he’ll steal find you one the next time he goes out.

The longer he’s been around you the better he’s been getting at comforting, at least physically he’s still working on verbally. He’ll curl up with you in a blanket on the couch, put your head on his chest, and ask about your day. He’s normally the more talkative one of you two so it’s an interesting change.

Sometimes when he gives you affection he’ll act like he’s only doing it for your benefit, like you cuddling him isn’t something he adores, but during these times he’ll let you see a peek of his true feelings. He’ll drop everything he’s doing to be close to you, and if you want anything you only have to ask and he’ll set out to get it. Yeah he’s got a guy tied up in the attic but that’s not important right now, you take priority for him over anything else.