#the wine incident

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Behold: The Wine Incident.

Basically, the twins wagered that they could outdrink Legolas.

They were wrong.

Arwen and Legolas split the winning.

(Sorry it’s a bit blurry. I lost interest near the end and have no energy to fix it.)

[verawhisk]

[CONSTITUTION] Survive Astarion’s New Year kisses.

[bbonnenuit]

chrollo x reader.

notes: no warnings, other than the fact that this was written in 20 minutes max. fluff. chrollos a loser (again)

"I'm telling you..." You release an exasperated sigh, "It tastes like hand sanitizer at best." Your fervent pleas are almost running dry, no longer opting for softer approaches on expressing your displeasure of being forced to taste test wine in the middle of the night. You glace at the the red liquid swirling in your glass and immediately wince as the aftertaste you had to endure a few moments ago suddenly comes back to memory- an odd concoction of acidic, bitter, sour, and sharp resulting in a terrible pang to your taste buds. As attractive the deep, dark shade of red looks, it does not taste as good as its visuals intend.

"...I see." Chrollo says, his compliance suspicious to you. He does not seem that all amused that he's practically wasting what seems to be the most high-end wines on you. Five bottles of wine- all he had assured would be your favorite as it is his- situated on top of the cold dining room table. All each 'exquisite wine' have earned your ire, each more than the last.

"Perhaps you'd prefer ones of the medium-bodied wines instead." Chrollo smiles as he turns around to one of the cupboards and you groan. You're in your pyjamas, sleep mask shoved back messily creating all sorts of odd curls and spikes of your hair, and you don't know where your other slipper went so you're barefoot on your left foot. Your irritation only grows by each moment you're not warm and engulfed under heavy blankets, under dim lights and some light music in your ears. Instead you're in this cold, annoyingly bright room with the sour, sharp stench of wine stabbing your nasals.

"Chrollo, please. I know your last name's Lucilfer or whatever but don't live up to it." If you had more energy, you would climb over the table and (try to) strangle the man. But all you can do right now is amp up the complaints, which you don't have to guess are entering his ear and escaping the other. "God, it's almost one the morning. Don't you have an... Oh, I don't know, a heist or something due by 12 tomorrow?"

"Yes." He turns around, two more bottles of wine in his hand. You instinctively cover your glass in caution. And the vermin has the audacity to chuckle. "I'm thinking of heisting wine houses."

You think about smashing every single bottle he brings back on his head.

[anns-works]

16yo Jay with 14yo Lloyd on his shoulders. They have a trenchcoat on in a cartoonish atempt at a disguise. Going to a store in the middle of the night to purchase candies and one (1) alcoholic beverage (neither old enough to legally do so). They make the cashier's day and get grounded by Kai when they get home.

[incorrectquotesideas-deactivated]

Person A: I know how this works and you’re not the one who talks, you’re just a party planner. One of you is supposed to have the guts to speak up instead of hiding behind this chick. One of you has to have the balls to say something to me. Do you? Any of you?

Everyone: …

Person A: Okay. Great intervention. I have been intervened upon. I will see you tomorrow.

[expolikestoart]

Day 6: Sunset!

Return of the Solar System AU because they dress pretty:)

@anaroceitweek

[stesichoreanpalinode]

The Freddie Mercury Trivial Pursuit Story

Everyone should listen to Crystal telling this story but it needs to be as widely known as possible so I am writing it up now.

Basically Crystal describes how alongside the epic Scrabble battles there were also epic Trivial Pursuit battles, and one rule that was made was that the answer had to be the one on the card. Because otherwise imagine the fights...

So, one time it’s Freddie playing against Crystal and Roger, and they reach the last triangle Freddie has to get, and it’s music. And by some turn of fate the question is, ’Who is the lead singer of Queen?’

Imagine the scene: the others cursing because damnit now Freddie is going to win and Freddie convinced that he has this in the bag.

Freddie, probably with a dramatic swooping hand gesture: ’It’s *me*, darling!’

Crystal, and I can imagine the deep joy with which he says it and the realisation sweeping across Roger’s face as he gets the point and Freddie’s howl of rage: ’That’s not the answer on the card, Fred. It says  « Freddie Mercury » ‘

From this interview with Crystal, which everyone should watch anyway:

[chickensoupleg]

Murder husbands/wives is fun and all.

But just. Accidental murder Platonic Besties.

They didn't mean to, but somehow people keep kind of stepping on their toes and alas a best friend that has defeated monsters can and will kill for their best friend. And, well, not their fault they're more wrapped up in each other's wellbeing than the fact one of them pushed a guy off a rocky cliff to their death.

It keeps happening, they kill people who make their best friend really uncomfortable/In a bad position, and they continue on. Sometimes they just do it themselves, no harm no shame.

And like. Of course they'll give chances, everyone deserves chances, but they better watch out.

It depends if like. They mentally soak in the fact they killed people? Maybe they do, and are freaking out every single time, maybe they don't and just believe that 'Hm, maybe they left?' because they don't really... Look down.

They're very protective of each other.

If we go farther, maybe it extends to the others as well. They love the family they've created, and they're 100% down to be scary guard dogs. Maybe they would have some sort of unconscious moral code, so they're not running around killing children for children, but everyone else is mostly up for grabs.

It's not that weird Robin wields a little knife now, life can be tough. Or that Steve's got permanent 'Can-And-Will-Take-A-Bullet-For-You' Syndrome, his friends keep getting themselves in danger of likely possible death.

[eastgaysian]

misc dak-wai lore. they enjoy alchemy they love mixing shit together and making concoctions but seem to have a knack for terrible poisons. they also have a tendency to hold onto old containers, glasses, bottles, or anything that 'might be useful later.' they also don't tend to label their experiments but keep track of what's what through some mysterious internal logic because as long as they know why bother. this makes it extremely dangerous to assume that any random bottle or cup at camp that they keep near their tent is safe to drink from, and has led to them smacking shit out of people's hands in a panic more than once

[shopcat]

going to an italian restaurant and asking for some garbage bread 🧄🌿🍞

[ribstongrowback]

see the reason why I'm not a billionaire is that when people bring me data that suggests that most deaths at sea are caused by user error my immediate thought is to remove the user (me) and put them far far away from the sea forever, where a more enterpreneurial spirit will say ah, but you see, that will change if I am the user, RIP to Fortunato but I for sure will be able to identify this bottle of wine.

[o-wyrmlight]

So far I'm really enjoying the Great Ace Attorney Chronicles by the way. The themes in it seems to take itself a lot more seriously than the original Ace Attorney Trilogy, and while it does have its own strange cast of characters, it feels a lot more realistic, if that makes sense. There are parts of it that are 'out there' but it feels more grounded to the universe itself. You can really see where Phoenix gets his tendency to find the truth in every case from.

[divorcedyaoi]

i need a glass of wine

[potatoesandsunshine]

it is nice to not care about the fake geography at all though. this mountain range is as big as i need it to be and has unlimited caves and as many small settlements as i want it to to tell the story. and approximately four thousand skeletons just, around.

[tims-missing-spleen]

(I like to think that) Lex Luthor gets clowned on by literally everyone, and Bruce is the absolute worst.

Like he'll attend an event and a literal millisecond later, Bruce will roll up and steal all the attention. And when they're inside, him or one of his crazy "children" will "accidentally" spill very red wine all over his expensive ass suit.

And what can Lex even do?

Last time he retaliated and mildly shoved Bruce, the man very dramatically flung himself across the room and fell straight into a table. He hadn't even gotten hurt- not a single bruise or cut- but that drama queen didn't appear in public for an entire month after the incident. The backlash Lex had gotten was so not worth it.

And it doesn't stop there. His kids join in on the "fun" and bully him too.

Tim permanently bans him from all the platforms owned by Wayne enterprisese, which is like borderline illegal, so Lex sues and somehow always loses.

Jason Duke and Steph team up and make it a game to throw things on his head without him realising. And when Luthor catches one of them, he can't even shout at them or whatnot cause hes actually scared shitless. Jason, the absolute tank of a man, just grins at him while placing his hands on the very noticeable gun at his hip. Duke and Steph stand on either side of him, gripping literal knives in their hands.

Damian just outright walks up to him and begins insulting him in a couple of different languages. He always gives Lex a final disgusted look before turning and walking off.

Dick might seem the sweetest, approaching him while smiling in that nice way of his. He's the worst, though, cause he always makes sure to bring a few reporters with him before he innocently starts outing Lex's latest evil scheme in front of the audience. He makes sure to bring solid evidence of the nefarious plans, but right at the end, he goes, "idk I could be wrong," before shrugging and walling off.

Cassandra doesn't do much, but she's definitely the scariest. Whenever Lex has had enough and is about to call a hit on Bruce, she appears out of nowhere, stares straight at him, and just shakes her head while saying, "No. Regret"

Basically, Lex Luthor, public enemy #1, gets (justifiably) bullied by the entirety of the human population (honestly, only the Waynes).

[prokopetz]

One of my favourite recurring tropes in children's and fantasy media is small, whimsical creatures randomly being depicted as extremely litigious. They're three apples tall and live in little mushroom houses and spend their time singing and dancing and making wine out of sunlight and morning dew, and then there's an Incident and suddenly they have judges and bailiffs and a thousand years of abstruse jurisprudence which they cite from a big book of statutes and precedents which is just regular size in human terms but is comically large to them. Like, where did all this come from? To all textual evidence there's like twelve of you – how do you have bureaucracy?