#therapy humor

[waitingforthesunrise]

And today, my friends, marks the day I was asked by a therapist what is your motivation for staying alive? And I looked that poor woman straight in the eyes and said, I haven’t worn a dagger in a thigh strap yet.

[troublegoblin]

i love having trauma from an alarmingly young age because when I can't remember stuff from my childhood I get to play a game called "Is This Normal Memory Loss From Growing Up, Or Do I Have Severe Trauma-Induced Memory Repression?"

[alicerader]

[allthebooksandcrannies]

Me, joking with my therapist that my brother's puppy is the perfect match for my personality since I constantly want to give pets physical affection and get sad when they don't want it, and the puppy constantly wants to receive physical affection and gets sad of he's not getting it.

Her, killing me instantly, "you know I've heard some people say the way we show affection to kids and pets is how we wanted to be loved as children"

[tinypawsllc]

Talkin to my therapist about the situationships

[mixedbag-o-beans]

walking out of therapy visibly sobbing: sometimes you crank that soulja boi and sometimes that soulja boi cranks you

[at-least-i-think-im-funny]

my therapist told me she hates swifties...

[zippyzstuff]

[adventures-in-therapy]

[study-of-happiness]

My therapist: so I found your tumblr and i...

Me:

[bourneblack]

Shoutout to my therapist who say “no you’re not” when I answered “good!” to her asking “how are you?” when she walked in. girl if u knew then why’d u ask.

[awetistic-things]

[ ID — emoji search bar shows the emoji with dollar signs for eyes and money as a tongue popping up after someone searched up “therapy.” — END ID ]

[shitpostingisanaesthetic]

I’ve started a “Red Flags and Who Inspired Them” book (my version of a burn book) to keep myself honest about who I let into my life.

[unicornstherapy]

Leaving therapy after a rough session like

[break-me-open]

Therapists hate them!

Local client won't stop making PowerPoints!

[rusty25]

therapists be like: "oh what a nice little delusion you have there, let me dismantle it real quick"