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#there's questions I'd love an answer to but... but there's reasons I can't ask them including I already have and never got a response
elvhensinner · 2 days
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Which group do you fantasize about cucking the most? Is it the same as your most biased groups?
Could you list top 10 individual idols that melt your brain if they are involved with cucking?
I'm not sure if its pretty much the same as my biased groups/soloists. Really, my basis for it largely depends on the question "Will they cheat on their significant other?" if the answer is no then I am just drooling 😋
I made this list from the get go. I still stand by my statement about whoever I find hottest at a specific night trumps over whoever's below my top 3 girls of all time. Literally, if this was asked to me on a different day, I bet I'd have different answers
Top 11 idols that melt my brain if cucking/cheating is involved:
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11. Jeon Somi
She looks like the perfect recipient of hate sex. There's also something about this girl that screams "Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed my night with your girl. But not because I like her, I just really wanted to try her out".
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10. Kim Chaewon
I seriously do love all my IZ*ONE girlies, but asides from her body and cute personality, Kim Chaewon is just not on my radar. (In all honesty, idk why). Soooo many people love her so much, its insane. But hey, at least whenever I see people fawn over this angel, it makes my brain instantly jump to how I'd take her from them. Hehe.
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9. Jihyo
Big tits. Motherly love. Officially confirmed that she has a boyfriend. Beloved by many. Need I say more?
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8. Ahn Yujin/Jang Wonyoung
Being a WIZ*ONE, in my eyes, these two are my forever maknaes. I just can't deny value whenever I'm hankering for a "younger sister"-esque style of cucking.
7. Kim Sejeong
I've always seen this girl as the big sister type. Despite her tig ol biddies, I rarely lewd her, but my innards twist in every which way whenever I see someone gooning the fuck out of her. Its always equal parts "N-no... she's my big sister... sTOP LEWDING HER!" and ".....C-Can you maybe tell me more?..." 🤣
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6. Lee Chaeryeong
As my #1 girl's sister, this girl has starred in many of my "shhh your sister doesn't have to know"-themed nights. That, plus girly doesn't just look like the epitome of wholesome, she also looks like she's a great target for dubcon. I bet this naive baby girl would believe something as stupid as...
"My penis has a genie inside of it"
"Really?"
"Only if you rub it hard enough"
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5. Momo
Body made for sex. Hands down, she takes the crown for my BHF 'making me have a random hardon and fapping like there's no tomorrow' title. I've also cucked so many people using this girl, so at this point I can't not associate her with cucking/cheating.
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4. Irene
This one is a mighty curve ball, courtesy of my recent Taeyeon prompt + @planetaryupscaled's cucking smut. That signature man-hater glare of hers is just begging to be forced into a dubcon scenario. Seriously, imagine those eyes staring up at you, hating your guts, as her lips wrap around your shaft. Add the fact that she's totally of age to be in a committed, loving relationship 🤤
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3. Kim Dahyun
There's a reason this girl starred in my debut story. She's so pure. So light. So wholesome. She is love. I just know she's the type to fight tooth and nail to have the most romantic, traditional relationship known to man. And that's the very reason my brain goes cuckoo about all the nasty ways she can be used as a means for cucking.
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2. Kwon Eunbi
This woman is just BUILT to be in RPs/smuts. There are so many avenues to her. Subby. Dommy. Mommy. Baby. Wholesome. You name it, she fits into it. The fact that I've already thought of a prompt for her while I'm writing this already speaks levels to her writeability: Imagine her bf being the one who first encouraged her to go wild in waterbomb 2023. At the moment, BF pats himself in the back for being the one responsible for Kwon Eunbi's spike in popularity, but these days? He's forced to turn a blind eye at Eunbi's multiple meetings with different investors, promoters, brands, etc. all of which always leads to Eunbi going home late at night. "I got the gig!" the BF hears every night, with her outfit an inch away from being undone.
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1. Lee Chaeyeon
Last but not least is my #1 girl. As someone who is head over heels for this woman, I can say with full confidence that my brain will —and ALWAYS WILL— melt at the thought of Lee Chaeyeon being used in a cucking scenario. Hell, the small matter of her (rarely) being posted on lewding sites is enough to make me rockhard. 🤤
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medicinemane · 1 month
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It's just a fact that nothing I do matters or has any impact
I can prove it, and I do mean that
I wouldn't want to because I think it would bother people, but I have... endless proof
#functionally I don't exist#I exist only in the sense of a vague technicality in that I'm physically present and all the think therefore kind of trash#but I have zero impact or interaction with the world#it's not that unlikely that I'm a hallucination haunting a keyboard#a figment of my own imagination#...the only sad part is if that was true at least I could just stop dreaming myself alive#instead of having to take more concrete and failure prone measures#but I genuinely do not and never have existed#and I really can prove it a thousand times over#but... I think it would be upsetting to have it all laid out; so I never will lay out the proof#besides; even if I said every last thing that would just sink into the void too#... I could say a lot more but I won't#there's questions I'd love an answer to but... but there's reasons I can't ask them including I already have and never got a response#...shame I won't even have anything to drink on my birthday I don't think#...if only I could dissect myself and place myself in neat little piles for medical folks to use as parts#if only if only if only#what I wouldn't give for a crumb#mm tag so i can find things later#or less kindly; what I wouldn't give to be able to breath these feelings down the world's throat#see how you like it when lockdowns are enough to make you squeamish#just bitter on that one cause everyone talked big about how sad it made them... but not a shred of anything given my way#when that's just a normal day everyday forever for me#I literally forgot about lockdowns being a thing on a regular basis#my life then and life now are the same except I don't have to drive to the trailer to clean; just have to go to the storage room#so that's nice at least#but I see the exact same amount of people every day as I did then#you could make some money killing me you know; and I'd film a clip making it clear it's all my idea#only problem is I'd have to trust you with people I like despite you being willing to kill... but maybe I would if you get it's a mercy#eh... I can't even say what I really think... I should go to bed#and I can't even talk about the stuff that got me thinking on this
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shaisuki · 3 months
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SHIT! THAT HURTS, BUT IT'S AN ACCIDENT. RIGHT, SWEETHEART?
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ft. gojo satoru, nanami kento, fushiguro toji, geto suguru
content warnings ─── noncon, dacryphilia, implied kidnapping, punishments, forced affection, choking, stockholm syndrome, blood, forced marriage, delusions.
ᝰ synopsis .ᐟ accidents do happen. that's why you accidentally hit them but thank the heavens above, they understand. it would be easier if you just let them do what they want.
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GOJO SATORU
the accumulated perspiration coming from the deepest end of your dermis shows it appearance as it runs down to your forehead. goosebumps rising as you felt his presence getting nearer. there's no blood lust or the imminent danger that tells your mind to run. accustomed from the conditioning your body had done every time you sense his presence.
your grip on the edge of your book gets tighter as the pages crumple at your very touch. you hoped he's tired or isn't in a bad mood. in that way he would just force you to cuddle him until you fall asleep. one thing you knew with living with him that is he never sleeps or so you think. you didn't know. you never catched him being asleep. it's not like you're going to murder him in cold blood.
you shift in your seat. trying to find a comfortable position despite the weariness growing in you and pretends you're engrossed in your book. you didn't want to send him a message that you're scared of him but you weren't comfortable with him either.
cold palms holds your round cheeks and you were greeted by him smiling. his dimples deepening and he is yet to remove his blindfold. “i'm home, my love.” and he squeezes your cheeks a little hard. anticipating the words that will come flowing out of your mouth. it's a warning. your lips tremble a bit. “w—welcome home, satoru.” you managed to say out aloud and he was satisfied. hooking a finger in his blindfold before pulling it up and discarding it. a sign that his attention is all on you now.
“would you like something to eat?” you asked him. biting your tongue at the question. regretting at your choice of yours and you should have stayed silent. your brain screaming and hoping that he is actually hungry and you're not insinuating that will get him riled up.
gojo chuckles. “you could be so cheeky, mochi.” pinching your round cheek. “you know the answer.” he said and you panic for a brief moment before he takes it back. “as much i'd like to have you for dinner, i prefer us sharing a meal tonight.” you wished this was set on a different timeline. where you would be his from your own will. his good housewife where you will miss him for real and share the sentiments of being together despite busy schedules but it's not. you're still sane and you were just playing pretend.
a quick hot meal and the plates and bowls are already laden with food. you both ate in silence. aside from him spoon feeding you. watched in glee as you ate what he feeds you. your lips around the chopsticks while you chew and hums in delight.
the meal ends when the dishes are stacked in the sink and you told him that you'll take care of it while he takes a bath. he didn't look at you suspiciously. confident in himself that can't run away from him and you knew that too well.
you're almost finished drying the plates when he got out of the shower. never liked staying for too long when you're here. itching to get closer to you every time he's far away from you and he takes a little longer to admire his wife doing the simplest of things. the calmness of your face and your body moving in slow motion. it's almost he was being serenaded with such tranquility coming from you. he almost feels bad when he's the reason sometimes of your tears.
he slowly walks towards you. encasing you in his arms and he feels you stiffen against his touch. body turning rigid while his large hands dwarfs over to your smaller hands. helping you wipe the plate dry until there is nothing left to clean.
“satoru, not tonight. please.” your husband began to kiss you. he likes the word "husband". it brings him joy knowing that he is yours. “why?” he asks. his hard on poking through his gray sweatpants and is pressed to your ass. “i'm not in the mood.” you reason out. holding his wrists in a firm hold. his hands creeping under your blouse. his fingers digging in the plushness of your stomach. “then let's get you in the mood.” he breath out. kissing the side of your head and then to your jaw. his hands kneading the flesh in your stomach like dough. his touch were like fire. scorching and scalding. burning in your skin and causing you pain that you can't measure with.
“please! not tonight!” you snap out in anger. in frustration. sick to your stomach of letting him do whatever he pleases. of pretending that you like whatever he does.
he stops for a moment. listening to your plea and he grabs your shoulder. making you turn around to face him. he cups your jaw and forcing you to look at his eyes. you could stare at those icy blue eyes that looks like spheres where the universe is held forever. instead you loathed it. it's a reminder how vast the world is and here you are, imprisoned and is forced to this man's whims.
your lips are soft against him. he missed kissing you. he's been away for a week and you're here, denying him. he took it as an advantage to wrapped his arms around your waist before hoisting you above. your body beginning to struggle against him but he continued to kiss you until you were both in the bed. placing you down before his body traps you.
“is it because i was rough last week, baby?” his voice laced with concern that it's poison to hear. “no. i just don't want to be with you tonight.” your eyes begins to get heavy with tears. “not now, satoru.” you begged hoping he would stop. gojo grasps your cheek. “i'm sorry if i was rough but i will be gentle tonight.” he assures you but no words can convince you.
then you leave him no choice.
he puts his shin in your thighs preventing movements and lessening your resistance to him and then in a brief flash when your wrist got loose. his cheek started to sting. the crimson liquid seeping in the cracks of his dermis and he smiles. halting his assault to you and relish in the physical pain you put him through. since when did he got injured last? feel the pain of the surface of his body. he fought the strongest of curses. fought with toughest of foes. got stabbed with a blade and shaked the hands of death.
there's infinity protecting him and yet, he can't shield himself from loving you and he's more than willing to accept your touch and harm him in anyways you can.
he watched you as you curl up in a fetal position. protecting your body from him as you sobbed. the first tears rolling down in your cheeks and staining the pillows below you.
this won't stop. you would be always in this position no matter how you resist. you braced yourself for what to come and you were met with nothing. no greedy of his hands touching you and you were relieved. maybe, he gave up for tonight.
how wrong you are. you look at him through blurry eyes and his pale cheeks were colored in his blood. you did it. you inflicted pain in him. you wounded him. you take a gulp of air. calming your erratic heartbeat. not once did it crossed your mind you can harm him. with his infinity and those eyes and the endless power bestowed to him. you could never.
there is a look of animosity behind your eyes that he can see clearly. he's a little hurt aside from the wound. your soft body is sprawled beneath him. sobs racking throughout your body and it hurts him a little to see you crying.
“i thought it will change....” a hiccup interrupted your following words then when you regained your control to speak, you continued. “...my feelings for you. that one day, despite of what you had done. i'll learn to love you...” your fist clenching. your hands making a close-open motion before turning into a fist again. grasping the blanket. “nothing changed, i'm sick of playing house with you. i fucking hate you.” all the madness and you don't think it will reach to him.
a little. he knows how much you despised him. loathed him.
he don't care though. you were still his wife. no matter what you were feeling. be it hatred or fondness that he will never attain. you already hate him, what's the point of caring for your silly, little feelings when he can always make it up to you.
“i know.” he whispers. brushing a lock of your hair and leaning down to press his forehead to yours. his blue eyes staring intently in your eyes, tears at the corner.
alas, it never ends. your tears, your voice and will being taken away. how his hands latching at the lapels of your top. ripping it apart just like how he always do. your pajama shorts following.
bite your lips as he slowly penetrates you. don't make a sound. you tell to yourself. just don't. don't. don't. don't. don't. don't. don'—.
he promises to himself that after this, he would spoil you. buy all your favorite snacks, new clothes, a whole set of the book he knows you really like. he would take the day off to spend the rest of his days pampering you. kiss all the parts where it hurts but now, let him feel you as he kisses the salty streaks of your tears in your cheek. stare at your eyes and search for his reflection. his fingers intertwining at yours and when you squeezed his hands back, he'll convince himself that you really loved him despite all of that.
and it's more than enough.
NANAMI KENTO
you spend your days lounging around. the ankle cuffs weighing heavier than it is. search every cracks and cranny of the penthouse, hoping to entertain yourself and you've found some rather interesting things but it was nothing when you found the key to your freedom.
an old model of a phone. it wasn't damaged at the very least along with a few scratches and a minimal crack in the corner of the screen. you think it was nanami's phone during his high school years but you set aside the thoughts. this was necessary for your freedom.
pressing the key button, you let out a sharp gasp. the device vibrates and beeps with the model's ringtone. every second feels like eternity waiting for it to power up.
the screen lights up. showing you the screensaver and the date and time that was at least a decade ago. you check if there is network and you were graced with a full bar signalling that it was capable of calling someone. you changed the date and time to match with today and to avail the services.
your hands shaking as you tapped the buttons one by one. unaware of the door opening and the footsteps getting closer to where you are. you didn't even think he'd be home this early.
there's a sound akin to a purr when you pressed the button a little longer. it's the last digit of the number of the person you've been itching to call since you've been declared missing. they must be worried sick. your hands shake, getting clammy as you pressed the call button. there's static then the familiar hum of the number being dialed.
dialing.
dialing..
dialing...
“hello?” the familiar voice of your mom at the end of the receiver and your hands tremble. you breathe in and out. steadying your breathing and you want to break in a sob. this is it. someone is going to help you now. a tear falls before you can speak.
“mom! m—.” it happens in a slow motion. his large and warm palm in yours before he pulls the phone away from you. pressing the end call button swiftly and putting it in his pockets. since when? since when did he get back? wasn't he at work?
“give it back!” you yelled, reaching out for him. for his pockets. why did it have to be so close yet so far. “darling, you can't.” he says apologetically. pursing his lips in thin line and he can feel a migraine coming.
“no! stop telling me what to do! i'm so sick of you controlling me!” you almost spat at his face. desperately clawing him to get that device. he holds your shoulder, stopping your advances in him but you kept fighting for it. punching at him with your fists but what are you to the man who was built like a solid rock.
he's patient but sometimes his patience runs thin when things doesn't go in his way. he's already in a sour mood after having to deal with a colleague and you, his supposed to be sweet wife is fighting him. with no choice, he lifts you up. putting you in his shoulders like you were a sack of potatoes.
that didn't hinder you and you were putting up a fight. your freedom was that close and you couldn't let this chance slip. your arms hitting his back and your legs moving. squirming as you try to wrestle your way out from his grip.
“let me go! let me call my mom!” you sniffle. the tears flowing from your cheeks freely staining the back of his shirt. your arms still flailing and with a particular movement. your elbow made contact on his cheek. nanami remains stoic and he knows it will bruise.
you limply slide away from his body when his hold on to you got loose. clutching your arms and watch droplets of your tears fall on the ground. your hiccups were sudden and squeezes your chest with every breath. “i just want to go home.” you whisper.
when will you ever learn?
and why does it hurt him when you cry even when it's your fault. he loves you. a part of his brain tell him. it's an accident. he tells to himself. you were never meant to hurt him and you were just missing your mother. what a pain. you were supposed to be dead in the outside world. now, your existence are known and it would not take long before it spreads about you being alive. perhaps, he can make arrangements regarding to your family members.
he loves you and that's why he only tolerates your misbehaviors but now, he don't think he can put up with this tantrums again. you needed to learn.
nanami kneels down at your level. his hazel eyes warm and gives you the illusion that he'll let go of this but it was unforgiving. he cradles your cheek with his palm. “i'm sorry darling, you need to learn a lesson.”
the blonde sorcerer watch in desire as shiver runs down throughout your body. his fingers tracing the outline of your back where your spine is covered by your supple flesh. normally, nanami would take pleasure in this. watch as you writhe and squirm for him. it's considered therapeutic for him but in the next minutes it would be going to be hard for you.
your face buried in the sheet while your ass is in the air. bare and sore from the previous spanking and it's not enough. you needed to learn. take a lesson in what he's about to do and he's not forgiving at all times.
he rubs his fingers into your clit. flicking and pinching to get you nice and wet for him. although he's strict on prepping you first — stretching you properly with his fingers, tonight it wouldn't be present. he hopes you're already wet before he sinks his cock into you.
you feel him rub his cock to your slit before slowly inserting his cock into your hole. you winced as his large cock forces you to open for him. he's big and it hurts. tears stains the sheets under you as you bit the fabric. muffling your discomfort and the pain that spreads in your sex.
shit, all he can do is grit his teeth while your cunt engulfs his length. he can hear your whimpers and gasps and see the tears spreading in the sheets. he needs to do it or else it'll happen again. he can never let you go or leave him. you will always be forever with him.
when he taught that you're well and adjusted to him, nanami began to piston his hips at a brutal pace. the slam of his hips to yours makes your flesh jiggle and watch it stack in layers and fuck, it's beautiful how your body moves and responds to his every touch. just bare with it. he thinks to himself. he won't last too long from how good you are to him and true to it, he's already spilling his load inside you.
and now he regrets it. your back is pressed against his chest while he rubs the sore spots all over your body. you remained motionless. blinking the tears away and how you flinches away from his touch. remaining quiet and barely acknowledging his presence.
“forgive me, my darling.” he whispers to you. kissing your shoulders in attempt of redeeming himself from being too rough with you. his heart breaks when you ignored him. making yourself smaller in his presence despite being caged in his arms.
sighing, he continues his affections to you. knowing in due time you had your share and you wouldn't want to experience any of it again.
one thing he's sure of. you will never attempt again with his wrongdoings plaguing your mind and it's better. conveniently perfect for him until the next time.
FUSHIGURO TOJI
who thought you could put a fight.
although the damage was minimal, adrenaline pumps in his system. it's clear you were startled and your flight or fight response kicking in, in which you choose the latter to defend yourself.
a huge scratch mark decorating his arm and toji barks a laugh. licking his lips and the scar on the corner of his mouth twitches. it wasn't any different to the marks littering in his back from his artist of a wife. it wasn't bleeding but it stings when the cold air touches his peeled skin.
emerald eyes glimmers in amusement and toji crouches to your sniveling form in the corner of the bed. he cups your round cheek with his hand. “what do you say, princess when you've hurt someone?” he asks. humming to get that answer but you stubbornly avoided his gaze. rubbing your hands in your arms to comfort yourself.
toji clicks his tongue in annoyance. “it looks like you've forgotten your manners, huh?” he grabs your wrist and you pulled it away from him but toji kept his grip tight and bruising. almost crushing your wrist. “need me to teach it to you, sweetheart?” the sorcerer assassin taunts you. you shaked your head and toji sighs. you're going to learn it the hard way.
it's bruising. his hand wrapped around your neck and you see little spots of white in your vision while he drills his cock in your cunt. his other hand in your plush waist using it as a leverage to get deeper in your pussy. “are you really make me say it, you stubborn bitch.”
you can't speak. not when his hand are wrapped in your throat. you can't even make a sound and you stare back at him with tears in your eyes while you squeezed around him. earning a involuntarily moan from the man above you.
he loosens his grip and you took gulps of air before speaking, “i—i'm sorry.” you manage to croak out and toji chuckles. “see, it wasn't that hard to say. you really like being fucked by me before you can learn your lesson. keep it in mind, that me fucking you is second to me killing those monkeys outside.” toji leans down to whisper those words to you. looking at you side ways and watch your expression morphs into something of fear, desire as you moaned around him.
“don't be fucking stubborn to me the next time or you will get worse than this. i won't be forgiving you.” he warns. “understand?”
“yes.” you say nodding.
“good fucking girl.”
GETO SUGURU
you were absolutely mortified. he can see clearly how your lips trembled and the hue of your eyes being clouded with fear. shocked even. he knows you didn't mean it and you barely made a scratch on him.
“come here, sweet girl.” geto calmly called you but you shake your head. taking steps backwards like you were afraid of him. “now.” his voice now assertive and you slowly walk towards him. head hung low from being ashamed of harming your master.
“i—i'm sorry, geto-sama. i didn't mean it.” you drawl out to him and his fingers went to grasp your chin. meeting his gaze and you were nervous just by looking at them.
“i know you don't.” his hands finding your back to rub it. assuring you that it was fine and no harm was done to him and only the feeling of being betrayed that you felt unsafe around him. thinking that he will lash out at you and force you to unimaginable things that he's capable of but curse user is not like that. he values you that much but it doesn't mean you'll get away from it.
“but it is an accident i can't turn a blind eye on. are you scared of me?” he asks. his gaze turning dark as he looks at you straight in the eye.
you remained silent. truth be told, you are. you are scared of him. you've witnessed how he can commit such heinous acts without remorse and you're afraid that you'll upset him and you're going to end up like them. that's what you think but geto is far from that to you.
he noticed how your body trembles. the face of anxiety is visible for him to see and he chuckles to himself, amused. he was just playing with you and the answer is clear in front of him.
he brushes his lips to yours. “do not fear me, sweet girl.” he murmurs. the action enough to topple you in the edge and he hears your heart beating in your rib cage. your breath stuck in your throat and your eyes blown with lust.
“you always can make it up to me.” he says to you before turning his back to you and it was your cue to follow him in his private quarters.
that's why you found yourself bare in front of him. sweat glistening in your skin while you worked to please him. accident or not, you need to make it up for him. a way you can be freed from the burden you are now carrying by bestowing the most of heinous of acts to him. one thing that you promised yourself that you will never lay a hand in him unless he instructs you so.
you just love him so much that you're blind that you are only being exploited for his own gains.
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dalliancekay · 3 months
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Aziraphale does NOT need to suffer MORE
Can't believe I have to say this. TW: grief, mourning, death (sorry) I have, since falling into the fandom 6 months ago to escape real life, seen many takes on how Aziraphale needs to suffer in S3 to match Crowley's suffering. Mainly as the counterpart to the moment Crowley thinks he lost Aziraphale as he's looking for him desperately in the burning bookshop.
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Then drinks, we suppose, to dull his pain, waiting for the Armageddon. Also, the way Crowley suffers at the bandstand argument, the 'I Forgive You' moments, which many people find utterly devastating and incredibly heartless from Aziraphale. Not to mention when he doesn't react in the 'right way' to Crowley's confession in the Final 15. And then on top of that, 'abandons' Crowley. Oh and also for, and I quote: "The smug and entitled way Aziraphale went around in S2 assuming Crowley would love and follow him everywhere." And for all this pain that Crowley endured for him, Aziraphale should suffer in S3, to I assume, even out the scores. Some people want to see him lose it, show his emotions, to cry or beg or otherwise show how much he misses Crowley and how very sorry he is for what he's done.
Now for the TW grief content I motioned above. You can skip to the next sentence in bold.
WE ALL SUFFER DIFFERENTLY I was on holiday late September last year, visiting my mum, stepfather and my two younger brothers. We went to a cousin's wedding. It was great. The day after, as I was hanging out reading a book my mum got a call. The kind of call every mother fears. My youngest brother (he was 27) died in an accident. We needed to speak to police and the coroner. She cried and cried. She's still crying. She asks questions. She gets no answers. I did not cry. I talked to the police. I googled a funeral home. I bought my brother his last set of clothes. He lived in a hoodie and torn black jeans. Mum wanted a suit. But he died in the one he bought for the wedding. I texted a lot of people. I bought snacks for the many friends who came to the funeral and wanted to speak to us after. My grief feels like a vice. I am not sad. I do not appear sad. Contrary to what people expect. But I am ANGRY. I am furious. But nobody can see this. I am not fine and I wish no one would ever* ask how I was again. TW/Personal content over. Since I was small (because I am weird like that) I genuinely wondered if, finding myself in danger, I could scream like people in films do. I don't think I could. I cope with hard situations, fear and stress and anxiety by shutting down, sometimes by retreating too, by furiously trying to find a way out. And I think Aziraphale does the same. And that's why I love him so much. And why I feel get him and understand that people sometimes can't tell how much he's actually feeling. I also express love the way Aziraphale does - by organising things for people I love, inviting them places, making plans. When Crowley said you call me for three things (and it's basically any old reason) I felt SO SEEN. This is what I would do with a friend who I know is feeling unmoored, sad, stuck. I'd text them with any old thing. I'd never actually say I love you, how can I help though, I would try to get them to talk, meet me, go somewhere. Aziraphale does not express emotions the same way as Crowley.
But his emotions are valid nonetheless. He is worried for Crowley from around 3 minutes into their acquaintanceship. And he NEVER stops worrying.
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And are we quite sure he has never lost Crowley?
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How many times did Aziraphale's heart freeze in horror when he realised Hell has taken Crowley and he had no idea if he'll ever come back and what is happening to him?
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How did Aziraphale spent the night after vanquishing the demons and starting a war? He had no idea where Crowley was. He was probably sick with worry that Hell just took him away. We didn't see him drink, but surely, the worry must have been overwhelming. The wait for what will happen.
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ALL his worries over the Arrangement. Was he worried for himself? Do we really think that?
Crowley thought he lost Aziraphale in S1, yes, we saw that. And what happened to the angel then?
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He got blown into atoms which I bet wasn't pleasant and when he arrives in Heaven he limps. Why is he hurt? Why is he quickly pretending he isn't? Why is he always hiding how he feels? Also, he immediately deserts, wants no part in the Holy War and quickly finds an extremely unconventional way to get back. It's not a grand gesture, he doesn't deliberate, doesn't worry that he will Fall (although surely that must have been what he thought), there's no pomp around it, he thinks it and then does it. No hesitation.
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Is this coming from an angel who just can't leave Heaven behind and longs to be a part of it? Who loves to follow rules? And let's not forget in those moments Aziraphale thought Crowley was most likely gone. That he probably left for Alpha Centauri. Last he heard from him he was told he was talking to an old friend and had no time for him. Why we NEVER talk about how that might have felt for Aziraphale?
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Things are not as simple as Aziraphale has been supressing his emotions and lying to himself about how he feels and he should get over it and become free. That's not how this works. He was suppressing his emotions OUT OF LOVE. His main goal was always to keep Crowley safe. They simply couldn't run away or hoodwink Heaven and Hell. They had nowhere to go. They had no hope and yet they kept loving each other. That's courage. I know we all grew up with Romeo and Juliet and Heathcliff and Cathy and we FORGOT that those were CAUTIONARY tales. And this is not what Aziraphale wants for them. He would never allow himself to go so fast he would hurt Crowley. He feels guilty enough for agreeing to the Arrangement and for meeting Crowley at all when he knows they can be discovered and punished at any point. And Crowley knows it and RESPECTS it. He does not tolerate Aziraphale's decision to not go on a date and to hell with circumstances. He understands Aziraphale's reasoning and he respects Aziraphale's decision. Don't forget, they have NO POWER. They can't change Heaven and Hell. They can't stop believing in God and work on their religious trauma. Their Heaven and Hell are real places with real power and they BELONG to them. Aziraphale's trauma and his personality are deeply intertwined and he'd probably never be the kind of person who is open in showing their grief or stress. He will learn to be more open, I' sure. With his love especially, we see him reaching for and touching his demon in S2. Openly being with him, looking at him without guarding himself. They got a little bit of freedom for themselves despite ALL odds. So. Just because Aziraphale is not crying and screaming and I dunno, tearing his hair out or whatever some people would have him do, does not mean he isn't overflowing with pain, fear, uncertainty, doubts, worries, and so much anxiety that if he let it all out, half of the solar system would turn to ashes.
Aziraphale does not need to suffer in S3 to level out Crowley's suffering. They are, unfortunately, equal in their pain as they are in love. If there is one thing Crowley would never abide, it'd be this take from the fandom. * One more note on grief: (obviously from my personal experience) As initiated by @anthony-crowleys-left-nut in a comment
It's not that I mind to know people care and worry etc, but asking how I am can only end in me lying (fine, thank you) and both of us knowing it's not really true and feeling awkward or not lying (I feel like shit, mostly cos I can't sleep and think the world is a stupid unfair place) and both of us feeling awkward anyway. Does that make sense? I wish I could tell friends/colleagues to ask what I've been up to or something similar instead. What I've been reading (um, AO3, but I'll make something up), watching, do I want to go see some spring flowers bloom (I do).
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gemini-sensei · 9 months
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hello! your writing is really amazing!! can i please request robby keene with a sweet hyperfem gf that’s a cheerleader or a ballet dancer? maybe how his friends + dad would react to him being with someone pretty opposite him that doesn’t even do karate. thank you sm and once again your writing is awesome 💕
I love this, it's so cute! Thank you so much 🥰
Robby Keene x Cheerleader!Reader
This is a little hijinks and silly fun, so I hope that's okay.
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"What do you mean you can't come to training on Saturday? It's mandatory."
Robby stares at his father incredulously. Not for the fact that he's already told him this fact a handful of times, but for the reason that he's pulling shit out of his ass. He's ultimately unimpressed.
"It wasn't mandatory until you just said that," Robby tells him, rolling his eyes. He takes his drink from the fridge, where he'd been stopped, and walks by his oblivious father. "And I've told you this a hundred times now. This isn't new."
"Where do you have to be on Saturday that you can't come to training, huh?" Johnny asks, following after him.
They walk the short distance to the table, where Robby is trying to study for his GED. His father makes that infuriating difficult, however, he'd rather be struggling through that than answer his question. Though it's been long enough that he's been hiding this secret from his father and friends. It's bound to come out eventually, so why not now?
"My girlfriend has a thing," he tells him, intentionally leaving out what the 'thing' is. "I told her I'd go."
"Wait. Since when do you have a girlfriend?"
"Why does it matter?"
"Because my son has a girlfriend." Johnny smiles proudly as if this is some big accomplishment. "Is she hot?"
"I'm not feeding into this," Robby tells him, finding that question weird coming from his dad. He's not surprised by it, but that doesn't make it any less weird. "And that's not the point."
"Right, right," Johnny says, sitting back. He pops open a beer despite it only being four o'clock. "Well, just tell her you can't go. If you tell her something else came up, you won't have to go and she won't get upset at you."
"No," Robby sighs, shaking his head. "I told her I'd go and I want to go."
"Well, what is it?"
"Competition."
"What, like a pagent or something?"
"What? No. Just leave it alone."
Robby gathers up his things and takes them to his room, deciding it'd be best to leave the conversation there. Besides, he'd like to study in peace.
○○○
"Where's Robby?"
Johnny gives Daniel a look, his lips pressed thin. "He's not coming. He's going to something his girlfriend is competing in."
"Whoa, wait a minute," Hawk says, inserting himself into the conversation shamelessly. His voice as well as his next question draws in everyone else's attention. "Since when does Robby have a girlfriend?"
"Wait, you guys didn't know about this?" Johnny asks, eyeing Hawk and Miguel as they look back at him curiously. They shake their heads and his frown deepens. "Well, shit."
"So Robby is missing training for his girlfriend?" Demetri asks for clarification, though no one there doubts that he'd do the same if asked.
"Yeah, pretty much."
"And it's because of some sort of competition?" Miguel further inquires.
"That's what he said."
"Aw!" Sam let out with a smile. "That's so romantic. He wants to support her."
"Well, now I'm curious about this mystery girlfriend," Hawk grunts, smirking as he looks at his friends. "I wonder what kind of competition she's in and how much fun he's having there."
"Hold on a second," Daniel says, stopping the teens before they can get too ahead of themselves. "Hawk, whatever you're thinking, it's a no. Whatever reason Robby has for not telling anyone about this girl must be a good one. There's no need to overstep boundaries."
"Fuck boundaries, man. I wanna know who this girl is if she's so special to hide from everyone," Johnny huffs. Daniel glares at him and he glares back, then turns to Hawk and Demetri, the resident cool nerd and huge nerd. "Is there a way for you guys to find out where he's at right now without him knowing?"
"Well, we could check his snapmap and see his location," Demetri says, pulling out his phone.
Hawk watches Johnny's face turn confused and he can't hide his smirk.
"What the hell is a snapmap? Is that some sort of soundboard app or something?"
Everyone looks at him, then each other before Daniel lets out an exasperated sigh. This was not how any of them planned their day, but he seemed to be the only one complaining.
○○○
When they arrive at Robby's location, according to Snapchat of all things, they find themselves at some kind of arena. Johnny leads the pack of nosy teenagers inside but quickly finds himself lost as her tries to navigate the event signs that are posted around the place. Hawk takes the lead, deciding the best course of action is to follow the noise.
Daniel follows begrudging behind his nosy daughter, promising himself to keep them all out of trouble. He sounds like a parrot, repeating himself about how this is a bad idea and how Robby will never trust any of them again if they continue on. "Curiosity killed the cat, ya know."
It isn't long before a woman stops them. She wears a sticker on her shirt that says "Volunteer," but the stern look about her screams wannabe event planner or security, or some horrid mashup of both. "Excuse me, only family and school associates are allowed here."
Ever fast on his feet, Hawk said, "No worries. We're with one of the schools."
"And what school is that?"
Sam spies a board with a list of schools on it, happy to see a convenient option on the list. "West Valley."
The woman's attitude quickly changes. "Oh, are you with the yearbook? Your teacher said you'd be coming, but we never heard anything back from him."
"Yep, that's us," Hawk says, pulling on a photo-ready smile.
"Well, let me get you checked in," the woman says, walking them over to a table.
To keep up their little act, Hawk and Sam babble on about having "finally found the right place" and "getting their stuff out of the car soon." Everyone else stays quiet for the most.
The woman grabs a sheet of stickers and writes on them with a black marker, then passes them out to everyone. When she gets to Johnny and Daniel, she says, "You must be chaperones."
Daniel opens his mouth to say something, but Johnny cuts him off with a quick, "Sure we are." It gets them each a "parent" sticker slapped onto their shirts and they're permitted to keep going.
As they walk, Demetri scoffs. "I can't believe that worked."
They find the entrance to the arena and walk inside, hearing some sort of chant echoing off the walls. As they come out from between the seats, they finally see exactly what kind of competition Robby promised to attend.
A group of cheerleaders took center stage as they went through a routine on the mats. They wear bright smiles as they lift their pompoms into the airs and their pleated skirts swished around their legs. Off to the side, other teams sit as they watch with smiles of their own or talk among themselves, waiting for their turn to go up and show the crowd their moves. Upbeat music plays as the performing group does their thing, keeping the crowd in good spirits.
"Oh my god," Tory laughs. She grins wide, never imagining in her wildest of dreams that Robby Keene would ever date a cheerleader.
Miguel nods along slowly, still a little taken aback by the scene. "This wasn't what I was expecting."
Johnny smiles proudly. "Hell yeah. My son's dating a cheerleader."
"Your son's pissed off," a voice says from behind the group.
They all turn to find Robby standing with a small bucket of popcorn in one hand and a bouquet of flowers in the other. True to his words, he wears a less-than-impressed look on his face. If looks could kill, they'd all be dead where they stand.
Johnny steps forward. "Look, Robby, you can't really be mad at us-"
"The hell I can," Robby cuts him on.
"I told you so," Daniel chimes in.
Sam slaps his arm. "Don't even go there. You came here with us."
"Enough," Robby cut in, gritting his teeth. "I can't believe you guys crashed my girlfriend's competition all because I didn't want to tell you-" he points at Johnny, "about her yet. And shit like this is the reason why, on top of the fact that you make everything that is in the slightest bit feminine into some kind of win to men."
"I don't do that," Johnny says nonchalantly.
"Yes, you do," Robby, and everyone else, responds.
He gives them all a look, but then turns back to Robby. He opens his mouth to speak, but Demetri cuts him off.
"The second you found out it's a cheerleading competition, you counted it as a personal win," he says.
"Shut up," Johnny huffs.
Suddenly, the music stops and the announcer comes on over the loudspeaker. "What a great performance! Give them a round of applause. We'll take a ten-minute break, so refresh your drinks and get ready for the great team from North Hills!"
People start to get up and move around, causing things to get a little chaotic and crowded. Robby takes the opportunity, with a major eye roll, to slip away. He walks back to his seat or rather stomps back once he steps onto the bleachers.
His eyes scan the arena but it doesn't take long for him to find the group of cheerleaders he's looking for. Not too far away, North Hills stands, going through some last-minute stretches before their performance. Among them, his girlfriend is drinking from her water bottle. Her hair is done perfectly, there isn't a single crease in her uniform, and she looks absolutely beautiful. Her uniform shows off all of her curves whilst keeping things modest, giving Robby an eyeful of her shapely legs.
As she caps her water off, their eyes meet and she smiles really big. She throws up her hand in a cute wave and he smiles back, momentarily forgetting his anger. He waves back and she blows him a kiss. Only for her, he pretends to catch it and press it to his lips, which makes her giggle.
On the lower levels of the bleachers, farther away from Robby but not too far that they can't see him, his father, friends, and Sensei watch. They're still equal parts curious as much as they are feeling guilty - at least most. Unapologetically, Hawk smirks as he watches the little interaction between the no-longer-secret-lovers.
"That's Robby's girlfriend?" Demetri asks, pointing out Reader among the group of North Hills cheerleaders.
Tory smirks. "She's cute."
Hawk chides, "More than cute."
"I just can't believe Robby would hide the fact that he has a girlfriend," Johnny huffs. He shakes his head, still in a state of semi-disbelief as he watches the group, studying the girl who looks to be his son's complete opposite. "A cheerleader at that."
"Gee, Johnny, I wonder why he'd do such a thing," Daniel deadpans.
Johnny goes to respond hotly, but the announcer comes on to bring everyone's attention back onto the competition. Soon, the North Hills team is coming onto the mats and getting into formation. They take their deep breaths, smiling big and pretty for everyone. Then the music started and they began their routine.
○○○
After all of the teams performed and the winner was announced, the room became chaos, but Robby could care less about the people around him. He makes his way down the bleachers to reach Reader, who is celebrating with her team by jumping with joy and talking over each other. They hold a big, shiny trophy as they squeal and congratulate themselves for working so hard to win.
She sees him as he's walking over and she lets out a giddy squeal of his name. She rushes to him and he catches her in a hug, holding her tight as she squeezes him.
"We won! We won!" she cheers happily.
He smiles and kisses her cheek. "I knew you would."
She pulls back, smiling at him. Her eyes shine as she looks at him. "Really?"
"Of course," he tells her. He has always believed in her. This is what she's passionate about, so how could she not win? "I got these for you."
He holds out the flowers for her and she takes them with so much care and admiration. "Aww, thank you! I love them!"
She throws her arms around him again, this time around his neck, and kisses him. He happily kisses back, holding her waist. He pulls her close, against him so that they can deepen the kiss and really share the moment. It's her day and nothing beats a hot kiss from your boyfriend after all the hard work paying off.
However, a whistle interrupts them followed by loud clapping. "Hell yeah!" someone yells and Robby pulls away annoyed.
He looks over to find his father and the others watching him. He glares at his dad, letting him know that he is not at all amused or happy with his presence there. In fact, the anger bubbles back up and his jaw clenches as he stares down his friends.
"I still can't believe you're here," he grumbles, cutting each of them a look.
Demetri and Miguel at least look a little guilty and remorseful, whilst Daniel practically chastises Johnny for encouraging all of this behavior and invasion of privacy. Tory looks amused as all Hell while Hawk takes the moment to shamelessly check out some of Reader's friends.
Sam smiles kindly. "Well, all of our meddling aside, I think it's sweet you skipped practice to be here."
Robby wants to roll his eyes, but Reader grabs onto his jacket and catches his attention. He looks at her and almost melts.
"You missed your practice for me?" she asked cutely.
He hums and gives a little shrug like it isn't a big deal. "I told you I'd be here."
"Aww," she lets out, smiling wide. She plants a big kiss on his cheek, leaving a little lipstick mark there.
He blushes as his friends watch, but he can't bring himself to care too much with her in his arms. She makes it impossible to be a grump when she's around, easily the best part of his days.
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lostxdrcams · 2 years
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Tag Drop | Elijah Mikaelson | The Originals
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just-jordie-things · 4 months
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Jordie sometimes I think about Yuta dropping me off after our first date and then after saying bye and closing the door on him the doorbell would ring and as soon as it’s opened he steals a kiss help my brainrot
god LOVE bc he wants to be a gentleman and take it slow but...
as far as first dates go, it might not have been perfect, but neither of you would go home complaining. all night your heart was aflutter- from the way he opened every door for you, pulled your chair out for you, and made sure to walk on the outside of the sidewalk, you were swooning every time you turned your head.
you'd been crushing on yuuta for some time now, so this didn't come as a surprise to you. it seemed everything he did was charming or endearing. so when he got out of the car to walk you to your door, your heart rate only picked up knowing what would come next.
maybe it was just your crush taking over your brain, but you had a feeling he was a good kisser, and you really, really wanted to put the theory to the test.
"i had a really great time tonight," yuuta would say, and he'd mean every word. his smile would be bashful, his hands would be tucked in his pockets, and he would look radiant basked in the soft yellow of your porch light. "do you... think you'll let me take you out again?"
(you've already made plans for your second date after passing a cute cafe that just opened, but you think it's so cute that he asked you properly that you decide not to tease him for it)
((yet))
"i'd like that very much" you'd say, soft and sweet, your knees weakening by the second as you wait for some sort of signal. a flicker of his eyes to your lips, a lean, anything.
instead, he reaches out to squeeze your hand gently as he bids you goodnight. but just as you're about to get onto the tips of your toes, he's releasing your hand, and stepping off your porch.
for a minute, you stand there and stare at him dumbfounded as he walks back to his car. you don't know if you should feel disappointed or heart-warmed by the lack of kiss.
maybe he didn't kiss on first dates? maybe it wasn't personal? you'd made sure to pop a mint in your mouth after dinner after all- and it burned your tongue when you let it sit too long for nothing?
making your way inside, you tell yourself that there will be other chances- it's not like you absolutely had to have a kiss goodnight to mark the conclusion of a date- a really, really nice date.
but a kiss would've been nice.
you kick off your cute first-date shoes and drop your purse beside them as you move to shrug off your coat. you refuse to let disappointment cloud the rest of an otherwise lovely evening! but you can't help the slight sink of your heart every time you replay it all and come to the end.
on the fourth replay, you've hung up your coat and purse and are just about to tuck your shoes into the closet, when the ring of your doorbell startles you upright.
you answer the door almost embarrassingly fast- even though you were still standing there and there was no reason not to open it right away- but you're frozen still when you see yuuta there.
your surprise is quickly overridden by delight as you smile at him warmly, always so happy to see him, even if it has been five minutes.
was this puppy love? the honeymoon phase?
"yuuta," you greet him sweetly, tilting your head ever so slightly to display your surprise.
you don't have the opportunity to question him or invite him in or anything, because just as soon as his name falls from your lips, he's wrapping his hands around your waist and his lips are on hers and he's kissing her-
oh, he's kissing you.
the shock melts away into something more pleasant... something soft and warm and so consuming that you have to brace your hands against his collarbone to make sure you didn't get too dizzy.
it was the perfect first kiss, even with the delay. he kisses you the same way he compliments you, softly and surely, and yet again you find yourself swooning. yuuta was a charmer through and through.
it's not a long kiss by any means, but when you part, you have to gasp for air, eyes fluttering wide open with unadultered excitement, only to find yuuta already smiling down at you. his face is flushed, his tongue darts over his bottom lip to savor the hint cherry vanilla just a moment longer, and you almost dared to lean up and steal another kiss.
"couldn't leave without it, huh?" you can't help but tease this time.
yuuta chuckles, you had no idea.
"didn't even make it out of the driveway" ___
yuuta sitting in his car turning it on and off debating on if it was too forward to go up there and kiss you:
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were--ralph · 4 months
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Hey i saw you ranting about trans men on a post, and i was just wondering a few things. This is a genuine question, as a stelth trans man, i really cant find anything about a pre op transitioning body attractive. Especially a pre op Chest. Now i do take testosterone, and i think that the parts that i find gross (ex: tits mixed with chest hair) are a perfectly acceptable thing to deal with so i can look the way i want to look. I love my body hair and my muscle growth, i just dont love the obviously not cis parts of me. What do you find attractive about this? I truely cannot for the life of me understand why people find trans men attractive but i would really like to understand.
I think spicy food is disgusting generally. it's like. hot and not fun and to me it adds nothing good to the food experience. Genuinely I don't understand why people enjoy hot foods it makes like. literally no sense.
and yet, people do. it's weird. I've tried on multiple occasions to get into spicy food and it just. suks. every single time it sucks. But everyone else in my family lives by it. And I've asked why for years literally unable to understand it until I realized.
sometimes people just. like things. things I certainly don't like and cannot enjoy whatsoever. But at the same time, this is true for me and not for them. I fucking love coffee to the point I drink it more than water most days, but no one else in my family likes it. BUT other people outside my family enjoy it too.
Life is weird and what I'm getting at is something that took me a lifetime to understand and I still can't wrap my head around it all the time.
People just like things. People love things and hate things. What things mean to one person can mean the world to another and death to the third. There's not always a reason for it, but what you have to do is accept that there are things in life that you just might not like much right now. but as time goes on you'll find value in it the same way your partner will find value in you and all the minuscule things you do and become and like and dislike.
And to build on that point, there are things I hated as a kid that I'm fine with and even love now. Each day changes you more than you'll ever know and with those changes, the acceptance that comes with them may be easier or harder.
So, to answer your question, I don't know! I just love men. Men with tits or pecs, men with vaginas or dicks. maybe both at the same time or neither at all! I just think men are generally attractive no matter the design or what's different about them. and not just men but people who present as masc in general. If you're masc nb there's a chance I'm looking at you through the window of a bar as much as if you were cis-male or trans-male.
I do know for some men, the allure of masculinity displaced with the typically-feminine concept of a vagina intrigues them. Maybe it's the juxtaposition of them together, maybe they just want something unique and new to them. Maybe they just really like vaginas and it doesn't matter who it's attached to, or maybe they just like trans men. Same thing with boobs, some guys just like boobs. Some men have boobs. the overlap doesn't mean net-negative results, it could be double positive.
And I don't expect you to love everything about yourself, god knows I don't love everything about myself, and despite people telling me what's good about me I can still find flaws within it whenever I choose. I think men with chest hair are hot as fuck, but also I've seen some smooth men that are just as if not hotter. I love me a fat man or a man with muscles, but i've seen twinks i'd demolish in one sitting as well. I've seen men with dicks and boobs and scars and and hair pretty much everything under the sun and sometimes I want them to sit on me and forget I'm there and smother me.
What you do have to do though is accept that you have those things, and you are those things, and even though you may not like those things you have to accept that they're a part of you and find value in that. And it's not an easy task at all to love yourself, but you have to try because even if you don't right now, there's a partner who will be waiting for you somewhere. there's a future version of you who loves you as you are. there are friends who love your flaws, pets who don't judge, and there are a lot of things that accept you as you are.
So just say you have boobs and chest hair. even if you don't love it about yourself right now know that there are and will always be people who do, and personally I've said before, but I wish i had boobs and chest hair it's just a perfect look to me. I'm fine with whatever my gender is, i just think its a good look. If I had money for top and bottom surgery I'd get it and never look back. You just have to find the value in yourself we all know is there, and if you can't just know that we know it's there and let that carry you through the day!
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the-whispers-of-death · 3 months
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Home Again
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
Most gods would be happy that they were back in the paradise realm after previously being banished and stripped of their divinity, but Fallen God!Ghost aches for you.
His nights are spent dreaming about you, the mortal who showed him what love was. He dreamt of sleeping beside you, kissing you, even cooking with you. He dreamt of your beautiful hair, your breathtaking eyes, your jaw-dropping smile. His dreams were filled with memories of your laughter, your smooth and lyrical voice.
Paradise realm is a paradise, sure, but nothing could compare to you. Your beauty outshines the paradise realm's, your presence calms Ghost in a way the paradise realm can never. The air was always lighter when he was around you, the colors of the world always brighter. You are his light, his world, and everything is dull without you.
He spends week after week searching for how to get back to the mortal realm and back to you. His power is potent, he can just teleport himself down to the mortal realm to see you but that doesn't seem like a satisfying answer to him.
Ghost would eventually have to leave you and go back to the paradise realm, forced to be able to only visit you from time to time. He didn't want that, he can't bear the thought of leaving you. Of sleeping in his own bed, alone.
He also couldn't make you a concubine of his, bring you to the paradise realm. It didn't feel right for him to ask you to leave everything you knew behind just so you could spend hours alone in his temple while he worked. You deserve better than that.
So what else was there to do?
It takes Ghost a few days to realize what he must do. What he has to do in order to see you again.
He is standing in God!Price's temple, all of the deities summoned there for the monthly update of what the pantheon has been doing since they last convened. He can barely hear what the others are saying, it being meaningless as his mind finally reaches an answer to his burning question.
"I'm stripping myself of my godhood and powers, permanently," Ghost says, interrupting the conversation.
The entire temple is silenced at once, everyone turning their heads to stare at Ghost in disbelief.
A god deliberating turning himself mortal? That was unheard of. It was absurd to even those deities who loved the mortals so much.
Price frowns, clearly thinking Ghost has gone mad. "Now, Ghost, let's think about this," he says, his words slow and carefully curated. "You can't just abandon your godly duties, you're the God of Warfare. If there's one thing that the mortals do the most, it's engaging in war."
Ghost scoffs. "My duties can easily be done by our Goddess of War," he replies, gesturing with his hand towards said goddess. "I no longer want to be a god."
His words ignite a flurry of murmurs between the other deities, all of them shocked beyond disbelief. They don't understand why he wouldn't want to be a god, especially after centuries of hearing him look down on mortals.
"Is this because of the mortal you met during your banishment, {Name}?" Price asks, peeved now. "I hadn't thrown you down to them for you to fall in love with them, Ghost."
"No, you did it so I could learn the importance of mortals and I have," Ghost cuts in, his power flaring up as his anger spikes. This isn't up for debate. "I'm doing this no matter what any of you say, I was doing a courteous thing by giving you all a heads-up."
Price shifts in the seat of his throne, itching to get up and slap some sense into Ghost. "Enough of this, Ghost. You don't even know if they will take you if you're not a god. Perhaps that was the only reason they fell in love with you in the first place."
Ghost snarls in rage at the accusation and assassination of your character. "Even if that's the case, which I doubt it is, it is my choice. I'd rather spend the rest of my mortal life heartbroken if they turn me away than spend eternity aching for them," he says defiantly.
Immense power fills the temple, all of it Ghost's as he pools it all in his veins. Stripping himself of his godhood and powers is excruciating, the pain almost enough to stop him, but he keeps pressing on with the action.
It was worth it, for you.
"Someone stop him!" Price bellows at the other deities, but it's too late.
Just as God!Soap reaches for Ghost to try and stop him, Ghost's godhood and powers are stripped from him, his last act of being a god is to send his mortal form where it needs to be: at your doorstep.
His second fall seems euphoric, a laugh bubbling up in his chest as he falls through the clouds and lands on your front porch just like he had done months ago.
He looks to the side just as you open your front door, a smile gracing his lips at the sight of you. The weight on his chest is lifted, everything falling into place once more.
"Ghost?" You ask, surprised. You had thought you would never see him again. "Did... Did you get your godhood taken away again?"
Ghost stands with your help, his skin thrumming at the sensation of your hands on him again. "I took it away myself," he murmurs, breathless as he stares in your beautiful eyes.
Your face twists into confusion, which makes sense since he had been itching to be a god again the first time he fell. "Why?"
"For you, love. I couldn't bear to live eternity without you," Ghost says, secretly nervous that you won't take him now that he's not a god. "I love you, {Name}."
"I love you too," you reply, making him relax. You step closer, happy that this isn't a dream. "I don't care that you're not a god anymore, I only ever wanted you."
"You will always have me, for as long as you will have me."
Ghost steps closer as well, reaching up to gently cradle your face between his hands. He can't wait for you to lean in as well, though you do so as he gently presses his lips against yours.
The kiss can only be described as heavenly, all of the noises of city life fading away until there was only the sound of you two kissing. It's so gentle and slow, Ghost savoring what it's like to kiss you. He pours every ounce of love into the kiss, needing you to be filled with his love.
It feels like you are kissing for hours before you both pull away for air. Your soft pants fill the air between you two, you smiling at him.
"Come on," you say, gently grabbing his hand and intertwining your fingers together. "Let's go inside and have dinner together."
Ghost nods and follows you inside the house that truly feels like home now. He lets you lead him into the kitchen, not even complaining about having to cook with you.
He had been a fallen god when he had first met you but now, he was neither fallen nor a god. He was just Ghost. A man you loved.
Reblogs are welcomed & appreciated! Asks are open, feel free to pop in and talk or request something! (SFW requests only, please and thank you)
330 notes · View notes
leclercsluvs · 1 month
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CL16/DR3 | Already Over | smau
part 6
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5
an: i'm not really sure who she should end up with in the end, so if please do let me know if it should be charles or daniel pairing: charles leclerc x fem!reader, daniel ricciardo x fem!reader
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(time stamps aren't that important)
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yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 2.985.572 others yourusername got a few photos this weekend (don't let him tell you otherwise, he was NOT asleep in the last photo) tagged: danielricciardo
danielricciardo now why woud you lie? i very much was asleep.
yourusername no one looks that cute (except for maybe lando) asleep. dont deny it. you asked me to take a photo of you pretending to sleep danielricciardo wow why dont you go be with lando then 💔 landonorris well you can't deny, i do look adorable when i sleep danielricciardo do not start, or i'll take away your trophy. landonorris yourusername i don't look cute when i sleep yourusername fine danielricciardo we can pretend you were asleep
ricsbestglam he's literally shining! haven't seem him this happy since he was in red bull with max
wrldof3 no literally like they seem so happy! i love them so much 🥹
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yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 3.736.193 others yourusername went on a nice little vacation in between races, he got us matching hoodies 🥰 tagged: danielricciardo
danielricciardo couple goals fr 🤗
yourusername the exact reasoning you gave me to get permission to buy the hoodies (i don't know why you felt you needed permission LMAO) danielricciardo i'm just very considerate :) landonorris unlike other people 👀
sharlslvr charles is back in the likes????
f1wagsupdates
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liked by leclvr, sharlswiftie and 825 others f1wagsupdate charles has been looking extra happy lately, however his girlfriend has not been seen lately, though he's always smiling at his phone. do we think they're texing? tagged: charles_leclerc
leclvr want me to be honest? i think they broke up. she went to every single race before, and now she doesn't? if my sources are correct, she hasn't been to 4 races atp, which seems a little weird since she went to all the previous ones.
scfty/n my theory is he's texting yourusername trying to win her back. he started liking her posts again. i even caught him using a song of hers in his story. leclvr wait are you fr?? no way!! lowkey praying it's her i loved seeing her support him 😍 y/nswrld no because same!! and her and daniel does look happy, but i miss seeing her in ferrari and red 😔
charles_leclerc
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liked by carlossainz55, arthur_leclerc and 2.364.923 others charles_leclerc sent some flowers to my favorite girl today. hope you like them <3
carlossainz55 they are lovely mate! who were they truly for?
charles_leclerc my girl. as i said carlossainz55 not girlfriend? charles_leclerc if she would let me, i'd call her my wife, but i probably need to put in some work for that carlossainz55 you did not answer my question 🤨 charles_leclerc can't call her my girlfriend yet 🤷‍♂️
sharlswrld GUYS ARE WE SEEING HIS AND CARLOS LITTLE CONVO???? does this mean he sent flowers to someone else? someone he want to call his WIFE?? him and his girlfriend like JUST broke up and he's already moved one?? good riddance LMAO
scfty/n omg now stay with me. what if he's talking about yourusername???? like he's been back liking her posts (which he stopped during after their breakup) and he broke up with his girlfriend who we never got a name for? were they even that serious? y/nsnonsense omg no because we all saw the posts he made for y/n and he never made any for his girlfriend after? and he did never take those photos down. i'm thinking pr relationship 🤷‍♀️ y/nswrld omg you're so right! but heres the problem.. y/n and daniel are still together. so why would he be sending flowers to her? scfty/n to win her back ofc duuuh
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 3.729.391 others yourusername got sent some beautiful flowers in my favorite color the other day. couldn't resist making a little photoshoot. 📸 yourbff tagged: yourbff
danielricciardo god how do you manage to look so gorgeous all the damn time? 🤩
yourusername i was just born like that i guess yourbff we love a supportive boyfriend yourfriend do you not remember him literally chanting and hyping her up behind the camera? yourbff i do indeed
landonorris those look suspiciously a lot like the flowers from charles' post 🤨
yourusername are you being fr right now? landonorris wait you didn't know who sent them? yourusername no clues at all landonorris you have to go check out his post. they're like identical
scfty/n did lando just confirm that charles did in fact send these to y/n???
sharlvr i think he did. i don't know how to feel about this ngl y/nsleclerc omg omg omg it's happening THEY'RE GETTING BACK TOGETHER scfty/n hmm think about the fact y/n has a new boyfriend and charles treated her horribly while they were together. chill a little lmao
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-
that's all for this part. i don't know how long this actually is. i also didn't proofread it, so sorry if there's spelling mistakes lol i hope you enjoy this, i'm lowkey stressing with getting charles to "be better" but i'm doing my best lmao
part 7
217 notes · View notes
createdbytragedy · 3 months
Text
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LOVE CHANGES
A/N: This is like the continuation of my previous post Love and So... There's this girl. But it can be read without reading them too. Though I'd like you to check it out and tell me how I do.
Pairing: Lee Minho x reader
Genre: Fluff, crack
Warning: Reader is a well known fashion designer, Han being extremely dramatic,
Synopsis: Its been 6 months since you and Minho dated which means 6 months since Minho has been acting 'suspicious'
It has been too long. Too long since Minho started acting really, really suspicious.
Han occasionally peeked at Minho who sat across from him at the dance studio, smiling at his phone.
Why is he smiling?
Minho had been acting so, so, so weird lately. And Jisung had noticed it since the beginning. He was acting really suspicious.
How?
Well, since when did Minho start to randomly smile at his phone while texting? Since when did he start to wear bracelets? That too, that had a sparkly sun in it. It looked like something he would wear but when Han asked if he could burrow it, he was met with a stern glare and a cold 'no'.
Minho's been too excited to go home these days too. Like, he had something better to do than just lay on his bed and dream about his cats. Whenever the gang decides to eat a takeout and just go home together, Minho would deny and say he had to go home now.
Go home to do what?!
Now, Jisung watched as Minho once again smiled at his phone then started typing. He stood up from his seat and strided towards Minho.
"Who are you texting?" Minho immediately pulled the phone on his chest, like hiding it from him.
"No one. " He answered, the smile he saw just now long gone and he had this serious poker resting bitch face.
"You were smiling." Han stated, eying him suspiciously. Minho raised his brow at his friend's odd behaviour.
"I was?"
"Yes, you were. "
A silence followed after with both party in different reason. Han looked at Minho like he was a puzzle he was trying to solve and Minho looked at Han like he just lost his marbles.
"What's up with you?" Minho asked, trying to fake a laugh to lighten the awkward situation.
Jisung scoffed," What's wrong with me? No. What's wrong with you? "
His tone raised and attracted the attention of the other hyung line present in the room. They gave each other a knowing look and continued minding their own business while keeping their ears wide open.
"You're acting weird. " Han told him.
"How?"
"You're smiling randomly at your phone and you never wear bracelets especially the ones with sparkly sun draped around it!" He looked so serious it almost looked like a couple bickering.
"Can I not just smile at my phone and change my interest?" Minho asked back, getting up to meet Han's eyes. He found all these so ridiculous and amusing.
"No," Jisung shook his head ," you can't. Not you. "
"What are you trying to imply by that, hm?"
"That YOU ARE CHEATING ON ME WITH A REALLY PRETTY WOMAN!!" He screamed, sobbing onto the floor.
Minho's eyes widened at the accusations or rather the fact as all his members looked at them. Eyes wide, jaw dropped. Hyunjin let out a dramatic gasp and he could see Seungmin smirk from the corner of his eyes.
"Lee know, you are what?" Hyunjin asked, clenching his heart. Minho rolled his eyes but shot them wide open when even his hyung joined.
"You're cheating on Hannie with a woman?" Bang Chan asked, eyes wide.
"Why are you emphasizing the woman so much?"
"That means you are dating a woman!!" Felix screeched, pointing an accusing finger to Minho.
And before he knew it, all his members had surrounded him, sitting in a circle and asking him numerous questions.
"Who's the girl? Come on, tell us!" Changbin pleaded, taking Minho's arm and squeezing it like a little girl.
"Is she an idol? Is she pretty? Wait, do we know her?" Felix seemed just as excited as a teenage girl.
"You cheater!" Han scoffed, "is she prettier than me?"
"I can't really imagine you dating a girl or doing anything romantic." Jeongin stated, chuckling dryly. Seungmin agreed, scrunching up his nose while looking at Minho.
"Aish! You guys are so annoying!! Why are you so interested in my love life?! "Minho groaned, shaking Felix and Changbin off his arms.
"Then just tell us her name and her Instagram id and we'll ask her on our own. " Hyunjin suggests, rolling his eyes like it was an obvious thing.
Tch, as if.
"No way in hell you're getting anything of her, Hyunjin. " Minho simply stated.
"Why not??!! Come on....... Show us a picture? Is it true? Did she get you this bracelet?" Felix asked, touching the silver metal wrapped around his wrist. Minho extracted his hand quickly like Felix had a disease or something.
"I'd rather not hear it, to be honest." Seungmin muttered, like anyone was stopping him from walking out the wide open door. But he stayed seated, next to Jeongin.
"Okay, okay, guys, I think you should leave him alone." Bang Chan chimes. A few groans left their mouths. Mostly changbin, Felix and Hyunjin.
"Oh, come one. Don't be such a party pooper. Don't you wanna know who got Minho hyung's heart?" Changbin said, making a heart in his fingers and placing it in front of Minho's chest.
"If you just tell me who the girl is, I'll forgive you. " Jisung added. Minho rolled his eyes.
"I actually do want to know, though." Bang Chan agreed. Minho could only groan now as his only saviour gave him an apologetic yet teasing grin. He let out a sigh of defeat and looked around at his members who looked back at him with eagerness.
"Fine. " He groaned, " I am dating a girl. "
A teasing whistle echoed and Minho felt someone nudging his shoulder. Probably Felix. He didn't care to look. They continued to stare at him like curious kittens so he continued.
"Who is it?"
"(y/n). (Y/n) (L/n)." Minho replied simply.
"Wait, you mean the designer (y/n)?" Hyunjin asked, eyes wide. Minho simply nodded,"are you kidding me?! I'm wearing her autumn collection shirt right now!" He shrieks, pulling his shirt to show everyone the white sweatshirt he wore.
"Seriously?! You're dating her?! For how long?" Changbin asked.
"It's been 6 months, I think. " Minho said, calculating in his mind.
"You've been dating for 6 months and never mentioned her to us?!" Jisung asked, too dramatically for Minho's liking.
"I did mention her all the time. Remember the friend I went to dinner with? The park? The museum?" He rolled his eyes, trying to remind Jisung of the hints he dropped.
"You just said it was a friend . You never mentioned the friend's gender. " Jisung said defensively. Minho rolled his eyes for like the 10th time tonight.
"I can't believe (y/n) would date someone like you. " Seungmin commented, earning a glare from Minho.
"What do you mean by that?"
"Nothing. Just that, she's so...... Cheerful and loud, in a good way of course. And you're just gloomy and boring. " Seungmin nonchalantly added like it was a fact everyone knew. Minho gave him a somewhat offensive side eye.
"Yeah. I've seen her interviews, she's really cute and lively. Like a sunshine!" Felix added, which sparked a lightbulb above Jisung's head.
"Sunshine?! Is that why you have a sunshine bracelet?! Is it a couple's one? Oh my god!!" Jisung's exaggeration made a few laughs and a few rolled their eyes," which one does she have?! A star?! A moon?!"
"A moon. " Minho replied.
"Do you have a picture together?" Jeongin asked, ignoring the shocked Jisung beside him.
"I think so. " Minho said, unlocking his phone to search for a picture of both of you.
"Hate to chime in but are we allowed to date right now?" Seungmin cut in. All of them looked at him with a glare that said 'not now'. But he just shrugged.
"The dating ban is actually lifted for us. " Chan started," but the fan's reaction may not be very pleasant. Plus, she has her own fans. I heard they are quite protective."
"Who knows you might end up bald and jobless like the last guy she had dating scandal with" Seungmin added, snickering like it was the funniest joke he had ever heard.
"Shut up now Seungmin," Hyunjin said, nudging him by the shoulder," Hyung, tell us about her more. "
"Is she the reason you started drinking coffee too?" Jisung once again questioned, earning a nod from Minho.
"I think so," Minho recalled," we actually met at a coffee shop. " "So, love at first sight?" Felix asked, making a heart sign. Minho shook his head and looked straight ahead. Lost in thought. "It wasn't exactly love at first sight but something similar. The first time we spoke, I felt it. An ache, like a little electric burn. I felt my life change. " "Fate, huh. 'Cause what the heck were you doing in a coffee shop if you don't drink one?" Changbin questioned.
"I don't know. I just felt like I had to go there. Something was so alluring. " "Cringe. " Jeongin snarked. "You seem happier, though," Seungmin stated, others nodded along with him," In the last 6 months, you really changed. "
"Yeah, I haven't gotten any threats to be put in the air fryer in a while. " Hyunjin remarked, making the others laugh including Minho. "I can do that now if you want, Hyunjin. " "No, I'm good, actually." "Is no one gonna come to the fact that my husband has been cheating on me for the last 6 months?" Jisung interject. "Well, (Y/n) is actually very similar to you, Hannie. She is, in fact, just like you. She stuffs her face with food and she fall asleep anywhere. She sucks at cooking too. " Minho mentioned. "Are you saying she has all my bad qualities?" "Bad? No way, she's literally perfect. Those are cute qualities. You should've seen your faces when you're passes out on the chair." "It's to die for." Changbin added.
"So, you're not leaving me?" Jisung asked, pouting. "As long as we're in the same group, I'll have to be with you even if I don't wan to. " "So I'm still your baby?" "You were never my baby!"
"Stop it, you guys! It's disgusting," Jeongin coughed," But, we'd like to meet (y/n). " "Yeah, call her here! " Felix exclaimed after he was done listening to all of them. "Yeah, I want her autograph!" Hyunjin added earning some side eyes from others ," what? like you don't have all her summer collection too, Seungmin" "What? shut up!" Seungmin blushed having his secret revealed. "I think I'll ask her. " Minho said. "She really did changed you, huh Minho?" Bang Chan giggled, seeing Minho's cheeks turn red. "OOOOOOOOOOhhhhhhhhhhh~~~~~," Changbin sang," I see someone is blushing, huh~~~~"
The other members upon hearing that, looked at their Hyung with the same teasing smirk and started to tease him. "Minho hyung seemed a lot happier, right?" Jisung said, watching others tease Minho. "Yeah. I can't wait to meet (y/n). She must be so special. " Bang Chan agreed. "I still didn't agreed to sharing him, though. " "WhAT?"
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how much of a flirt is harvey specter with his s/o and what does that look like? 👀
Harvey Specter/AFAB!Reader
Warnings: Nothing, just fluff. Fluff and banter.
Rating: T
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"Is this seat taken?"
The question makes you lips curl with a smile, though you keep your eyes set stalwartly on your phone as you write out in email.
"The air's occupying it pretty heavily," You offer.
"Do you mind if I join you?"
"If you must."
You don't have to look to know that the remainder of the bar is unoccupied, and there's no doubt as to why the man's bothered to sit beside you. You don't even bother to get a look at your new companion.
"Do you come here often?" He asks, and you can't help but scoff a laugh.
"Really? That's your opening line?"
"Technically, my opening line was 'is this seat taken'. This is just my second ice breaker."
"The fact that you need a second ice breaker is concerning."
"You haven't answered it."
"It wouldn't help you. I never answer that honestly."
"Why not?"
"In case you're some weirdo stalker."
"At least I'd be a weirdo stalker with money."
"You'd have to be. A damn gimlet costs $40 here. It's horrifying."
"It's Manhattan."
"I know bars where you can get a gimlet for a reasonable price."
"Why aren't you there now?"
"Because I'm meeting someone. He'll need that seat, by the way."
"He won't."
"No? And why's that?"
"You'll be too in love with me by the time he gets here."
"Well. He is late already," You eye the time before you finally lower your phone, turning to get a look at the man. He's smiling warmly at you, his dark eyes glimmering with mirth. Sweeping your gaze over his suit, and you find his tie just a touch askew.
"...I guess you'll do for now," You sigh forlornly.
"I'm flattered."
"You should be. I'm throwing a good man over for you."
"A late good man?"
"Not the first time, certainly won't be the last."
"Any man that leaves you on your own ought to be drawn and quartered."
"I don't mind some time to myself."
"Secure. I like that."
"Is that all you like?"
"Hardly, but we'll start there."
"Erm...Ma'am?"
The two of you turn your heads at the sound of the tentative interruption by the bartender. You arch a brow, urging them on, and they add, "This man isn't bothering you, is he?"
You grin, unable to help it, and knowing that Harvey's doing the same.
"Yes, but it's alright. He's my husband, so he bothers me all the time."
"Oh," They chuckle, nodding, "Is there anything that I could get you, sir?"
"Macallan, neat."
"And another for you, ma'am?"
"Please."
"Coming right up."
You reach out, straightening Harvey's tie. His gaze lingers on you, and he catches hold of your hand before you can pull it away.
"You're late," You admonish.
"I know, I'm sorry. A deposition ran over," He leans in, lips brushing yours, "And traffic was awful."
"Why don't you just take the train?"
"Mm."
"I know it has some issues, but Manhattan traffic, my god—"
"Would you shut up and let me kiss you?" He murmurs, the feeling of it buzzing your lips. You grin, raising your free hand to cup his jaw and press your lips warmly to his. He sighs softly, lowering his hand to your leg and sweeping his thumb gently over the exposed skin of your knee.
"Let's bag dinner," He mumbles, "I want to take you home now."
"Dinner first, Specter," You pat his cheek and turn back toward your phone. "I'm willing to bet you haven't eaten since this morning."
Harvey just grunts in annoyance, leaning in and brushing his lips against your neck, only drawing away as the bartender sets his Macallan down.
"Your table is nearly ready, Mrs. Specter," They add, smiling at you and setting down your fresh drink.
"Thank you."
You hear Harvey huff softly, and you turn, brow furrowing.
"What is it?"
"Nothing," He shakes his head, a fond smile on his lips as he lowers his drink. "I just never get tired of hearing that."
TLDR: He flirts with them a lot
871 notes · View notes
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Could I request Miko, Lisa, and Navia with an author s/o who writes hot-selling stories based on them?
(Genshin Impact) Miko, Lisa, and Navia's S/O writing stories about them
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Yae can't help but laugh upon reading S/O's stories, quickly realizing who the protagonist resembles.
With a grin she leans onto the table S/O is currently writing on.
(Yae) "Well, it looks like you were certainly inspired by a certain someone. Do you really think that I'm that mischevious?"
(S/O) "Oh, I don't think it. I know it. The real question is if anyone else has realized it yet."
(Yae) "Hm, well your protagonist is already a woman, but not a kitsune. Perhaps we should add in that detail?"
She absolutely loves her own characterization, coy, mysterious, intimidating, it was anything but boring.
And that's all she really asked for.
Well, that and some mora for S/O using her likeness.
(Yae) "If you want to continue using me in your stories, I want a little bit of the share."
(S/O) "Yae, you already publish my books-"
(Yae) "Mhm, but I don't recall you ever asking permission to have me as your main lead. Therefore, I want some compensation."
(S/O) "Will Fried Tofu work?"
(Yae) "...Perhaps.
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Lisa has quite the amount of time to read books in the library, and it isn't long until S/O has her proofread some of their works.
She knows they sell well, and figures she might as well give her two cents on the matter.
Before realizing their protagonists sounds very familiar.
(Lisa) "Brown haired, green eyes, very flirty...How creative, S/O!"
(S/O) "They say write what you know, right? So, I figured I might as well make the main lead the most interesting woman I know."
(Lisa) "I'd normally agree, but she also seems to be very lazy. Are you trying to imply something?"
Lisa asks with a slight grin. Though her tone is teasing, S/O knows damn well to answer correctly.
(S/O) "Creative liberties, my love. It only means something if you think it does!"
(Lisa) "Hm, a reasonable answer. Any other traits about them I should be aware of before I continue?"
(S/O) "They're very smart. That one is based off you."
(Lisa) "Good answer."
Lisa finds it amusing to see how S/O views her on a daily basis put to paper.
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Navia doesn't take too much time to read books with how busy she is, but she makes an exception if her S/O is the author!
It takes her a good chunk of the book before realizing that the protagonist was kind of familiar...
(Navia) "S/O, the girl in this story is very reminiscent to the stories I told you about me."
(S/O) "Hm? I have no idea what you're talking about!"
Navia crosses her arms and raises an eyebrow alongside giving them a smile.
(Navia) "Down to the gun umbrella? Why did you not tell me sooner that I am your main star?!"
(S/O) "I wanted it to be a surprise, was it?"
(Navia) "Hah, I'd say so. But she's really ditzy. Do you see me that way too?"
Suddenly, S/O was silent.
(S/O) "You just have a lot of energy is all, I wouldn't really say ditzy."
Navia began pouting.
(Navia) "I am not like her at all, I don't make decisions out of the blue like that!"
(S/O) "..."
(Navia) "...Okay, not ALL the time!"
306 notes · View notes
shayyprasad · 3 months
Text
would you love me if i were a worm? | peter parker
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summary: you ask peter a very, very serious question.
warnings: nothing! (reader goes by rose sometimes... like a pet-name?)
pairing: frat!peter x bimbo reader
word count: 0.7k+ words
a/n: i honestly had so much fun writing intellectual, i wanted to add more to this little bimbo!verse! this trend feels like such a cute, bimbo-y thing, so i put it on here! (in no way is use of "bimbo" meant to be a patriarchal stereotype. please do not take it offensively, this is a work of fiction.)
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M.LIST | RULES/REQUESTING | ABOUT ME
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you're scrolling through your instagram reels, trying to pass your time. you're snuggled against peter - he's nice and warm - and lazily draped against him.
his arm has lost feeling at this point, but he couldn't care less, he's totally happy with it. being close to and loved by you is the best thing he could ever ask for. peter's lost a lot in his life, but you'll never be one of them.
he has his head laying on top of yours, tapping away at his laptop. peter's been busy with spider-man, to the point where the essay that is due tomorrow completely slipped his mind. he's trying to multitask since he hasn't spent that much time with you lately.
he's struggling, typing with one hand, but it's worth it.
you swipe to the next video using your freshly painted nails (they're a nice shade of pink, topped with a glitter coat). what's playing is a girl talking to her boyfriend; you can't hear the audio, but there a subtitles. the girl poises a very important question:
what would he do if she were a worm? would he love her still?
which leads you to think, what would peter do if you were a worm?
would he still love you?
or would he give you away? throw you into the dirt? would he step on you?
you gasp at the thought, and peter turns to look at you. "you good?" he doesn't look nor sound especially concerned, but the look in his eyes gives it away.
"petey?" you ask, eyes wide and wet.
"yeah, rose?"
"would you still love me if i were a worm?"
he's about to burst into laughter, he really is, but with one more look at you, he realizes that's not a great idea. the way you're looking up at him, expectant and weary, almost like you're afraid of his answer has him rubbing your shoulder, a chuckle slipping out.
if it's even possible, your eyes widen more. "you wouldn't?" eyes glossed over, lips pouted, he wishes he could take that stupid little chuckle back. he doesn't like the way you're tearing up, even if it's for a reason like this.
peter doesn't get fazed by much, he's spider-man, but watching you cry is number one on his list.
peter thinks it a silly question; he'd love you if you were a damn rock.
you're so gorgeous like this (not the crying), he can't help but think. with your hair in soft curls, satin hugging your figure. the curve of your lashes, how you blink up at him.
god, he's so happy he's with you.
"of course i would," peter says quickly, realizing he's been quiet a moment too long.
"really?"
"yeah," by the look on your face, it's not enough. "uh, i'd love you still."
"you'd carry me around with you?"
"sure. i'd figure out how to give you a cute pink bow, we could tie it around your waist- er... around you. and buy you a little dollhouse, you could use the rooms."
peter's committed now, and your eyes aren't welling with tears anymore.
"can it be a, like, pink dollhouse?" you ask, softly, voice moist from tears.
"with glitter," he adds, "and if we can't find a nice enough one for you, that's absolutely perfect... i'll make you one myself."
"oh my god, really?"
"anything for my favorite lady. in fact, i'd get you the finest food too. top notch- top notch whatever-it-is-that-worms-eat food."
peter's so glad none of his frat brothers are seeing this, he would've died of mortification. but here, in this room, where it's just the two of you - peter doesn't have a care in the world.
"and, y'know what? i think i'd even find you a pink little louis-v bag. that's right, my rose." he's spewing facts right now, he'd do all this. well, maybe not the bag. the two dollars in his bank account might not work out great with that.
but you don't have to know that part, it's fine.
"i'd read your, uh- fashion magazines and stuff to you. show you the pictures and everything," he loves the smile you have on right now.
"you'd be the most beautiful worm there is," he finishes.
"awww. i'd love you if i was a worm too," you say, nuzzling your nose against his.
"i've got no doubt, rose."
it's not all a lie though, hypothetical or not. he's made a promise to never leave your side, worm or not.
taglist: @whatsupstark @ell0ra-br3kk3r @idli-dosa @susvale @kdbsr-h @littlemsbumblebee @sflame15-blog @twinsunkithies @chocolateshepherddreamclod
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sanguinesky-if · 1 month
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This is a tumblr classic but the ros' reaction to mc having a hickey on their neck only to find out it's a mosquito bite later on? In crush stage
Hi, I apologize for taking so long to respond.
I know it's supposed to be an easy question, but there are too many complications for me.
The main issue is, it will take most of the ROs a while to realize they are in love with the MC, even if they've already kissed or gone further.
So, their reactions might change based on:
If the ROs realize they have feelings for the MC.
If there was already something physical between the RO and the MC.
The relationship dynamic between the RO and the MC (like K and a shy MC have very different dynamics than with a bold MC).
Considering all this and for the sake of drama (because to be honest, I think it's pretty easy to tell the difference between a mosquito bite and a hickey), I'll try to answer, but it will be quite general.
Kyle / Keira
Unconscious crush: K will be quick to judge, and as soon as they notice the 'supposed hickey', they will instantly feel contempt and irritation. K will sincerely think that what irritates them is the fact that the MC has no shame in openly displaying something like this, though in reality, it's just plain jealousy. Conscious crush: K will still be quick to judge, but this time, upon realizing the true reason, it will add anger to all the other negative emotions they're feeling. Anger isn't something K can hold in for long, so they will snap very quickly, not necessarily even because of that, but they'll let the MC know the 'real' reason right in the process of their snap. I imagine K will say something like, 'And for the fuck's sake, cover your neck!' When they find out it's not a hickey, K will need time to cool off, so it's either they'll leave or they ask the MC to leave them alone. Even after they calm down, the residue will remain: K will hate how weak and vulnerable their feelings make them, so they'll strongly try to deny their feelings, which will lead to them trying to shut themselves off from the MC and avoid them. K will berate and despise themselves for letting someone closer to them and now suffering because of it.
Lex / Lexie
'Anxious meow meow' mode is activated (I'd like to thank this anon for first mentioning it; I think that will become the official name for L's state from now on when they're feeling too worried). L will feel sick and devastated, worrying that the MC has found someone or was with someone, even if it wasn't serious. L fully understands they're just friends and shouldn't feel this way, but here they are. I find it amusing that when L finally gathers the courage to ask about it, they'll start with something like, 'Hey, so... we're best friends, right? How come you didn't tell me you were seeing someone?' When they find out it wasn't a hickey, they'll feel so relieved they might even feel weak in the knees. Given that the MC and L have known each other for around a decade, it'll be easy for the MC to notice L's true emotions behind their wobbly smile. I think it could actually lead to a heated moment between them if the MC dares to ask, 'Were you worried I was with someone?' (shy MC) or straightforwardly, 'Were you jealous?' (bold MC). Even if it doesn't happen, it will be another indicative moment for L, showing what might happen if they continue to do nothing about their feelings.
Morgan
To understand Morgan's reaction (or rather its seeming absence), you must know that Morgan struggles with several internal conflicts. Firstly, Morgan acknowledges their guilt towards the MC: they don't regret withholding information about various matters, but they do regret the distress it caused the MC. Secondly, Morgan struggles with fully experiencing emotions. Morgan can grasp what they're feeling but can't fully immerse themselves in those emotions. Considering these facts, Morgan will try to remain level-headed and refrain from saying anything to the MC when they spot the 'supposed hickey'. Morgan will recognize that something inside them feels 'off' but will try to convince themselves that it's good for the MC to have someone by their side, although it will be insincere. Despite their claims that 'it's for the best', Morgan will continue to watch the MC closely afterward, trying to figure out from other signs whether the MC has found someone or if it wasn't something serious, secretly hoping they still had a chance with the MC. I also think when they get a closer look at the MC's neck, they'll realize it's just a mosquito bite, and their body will immediately relax, only then let them realize how much they were tense because of it. It will still be a fairly indicative moment, showing Morgan that they're more deeply invested in this than they thought, particularly in their feelings towards the MC.
Roderick / Rebecca
Unconscious crush:  R will freeze, inside and out (which I imagine looks very noticeable and hilarious). Even though they'll quickly recover externally, inside, they'll feel a strong sense of concealed frustration. But they won't even try to understand why, so they won't ask the MC anything. And probably without realizing it, they'll avoid looking at the MC for a day or two. Conscious crush: R will feel angry right away but won't show it.   Reacting so strongly is a weakness for them, but it's not just about displaying it: the mere fact of having such a strong reaction, especially because of someone (the MC) also counts, which makes them even angrier. And that anger will dictate their actions. . . . R takes a few steps closer to you. "What's wrong?" you ask, tilting your head slightly, trying to understand what's going on. R doesn't say a word, and although their facial expression and posture look relaxed, you immediately sense a shift: the air between you becomes heavy, and their gaze seems to grow darker and colder. Their eyes never leave your neck, and you freeze as their hand reaches for the collar of your shirt, pausing for a moment before gently pulling it closer to your neck. Then, their gaze returns to yours. "It's nothing," R says calmly, turning away from you. . . . Even if the MC tries to explain that it's just a mosquito bite, R will say something like, 'I didn't ask.' They realized it wasn't a hickey the moment they stepped closer, and the instant relief would be replaced by resentment: they will be very angry that what they experienced literally controlled them. Usually, they let it happen by giving in to their feelings, and it was always a conscious choice. But the MC changes things, and changes they can't control will always provoke a strong reaction in them.
Theo / Tess
Unconscious crush (if there wasn't something physical between them and the MC): T treats physical intimacy as something casual, so it would seem obvious to them that someone so criminally hot as the MC already has someone. But when feelings come into play, everything changes: T had never felt so strongly about anyone but the MC (that goes for physical intimacy as well), so they won't understand why what they see doesn't sit right with them. However, they usually don't think too much when it comes to their affairs, so they quickly brush off this subtle feeling. Instead, their mind will be filled with... other thoughts, which they'll be sure to share with the MC. But as soon as they lean in closer to the MC and get a better look at their neck, they immediately realize it's not a hickey. . . . T leans closer to you, humming thoughtfully. You pull back a little in suprise. "What is it?" T looks up, your gazes lock. "You know, if you need someone to show you what the real hickey is supposed to look like, I humbly volunteer." You touch your neck, realizing what they are talking about. "It's a mosquito bite." "Oh, really?" T ask innocently, giving you a disarming smile. "Well, even so, what I said still stands." Unconscious crush (or if there was already something between them and the MC): ...No. Just no. I won't tell you. I mean, I will. But through the main story.
Isaac / Iris
Isaac / Iris never jumps to conclusions. Well, never until jealousy comes into play. The moment they see the 'supposed hickey', they feel bitter, disappointed, and frustrated. They avert their gaze, trying to take a moment to suppress and hold back what they're feeling right now, or rather, what they shouldn't feel. They realize that under the current circumstances, they don't know what they're dealing with and are unsure about what the MC is. Are they a victim, a threat, or simply a coincidental variable that signifies nothing? Since it's common practice for them to suppress what they're genuinely feeling and rely on the mind rather than the heart, they're able to calm down pretty quickly. But once they return their gaze to the MC, all reasonable arguments will die when their eyes flick back to the MC's neck. . . . "You have a hickey," I says calmly, but you notice a distinct change in their tone and demeanor. Their voice loses its warmth, and their gaze turns unrecognizably detached, yet it remains fixed on yours. You frown, caught off guard by such a shift. "I don't—Oh." Realizing what they mean, your hand involuntarily touches your neck. "It's a mosquito bite." You see them blink, and a moment passes before they look away. "I... That was... I shouldn't..." You notice they avoid meeting your gaze, but before you can ask what's wrong, they add, "I apologize, I need a moment." Without waiting for your response, they turn and walk away. . . . They'll feel foolish for jumping to conclusions, but they'll feel even worse for displaying their personal interest in the MC so openly. They understand that the MC's presonal life is not their concern, and any interest they harbor can never evolve into something more, and that's probably for the best. But if the MC begins to reciprocate their interest... They're scared that they'll have to refuse, but what scares them even more is the possibility that they won't be able to refuse.
Sebastian / Selena
Unconscious crush: I think S won't understand their feelings when they see the 'supposed hickey'. They'll want to know more about whether the MC has someone because it's information, and any information can be useful later (at least that's what they'll tell themselves). Even without realizing it, they'll secretly study the MC closely and quickly conclude it's not a hickey. And if it is, they'll consider it a 'pitiful imitation' at best. Conscious crush: They won't be able to just let it go for later and will behave more boldly, trying to get answers to their questions right away. A 'straightforward approach' is both uncharacteristic for them and very indicative of how much what they feel deeply concerns them. . . . Approaching you closer, their gaze momentarily drops to your neck, and the hints of amusement fade from their expression. Even though their lopsided smirk remains, you notice a subtle shift in their demeanor. Their hands gently touches your chin, tilting your head slightly as their gaze shifts to your neck, then back to your eyes. "You look good today," S says, withdrawing their hand before you can pull away, looking almost smug as they take a step back. "Although your 'neck adornment' leaves a lot to be desired. But that's a question for the manufacturer." You touch your neck, realizing what they're talking about. "It's a mosquito bite." . . . This will be a good chance for the MC to ask if S felt jealous. S might sidestep the question, but what's important is that they'll ask themselves this, which will give them something to think about. If the MC is strict, S will also say something like, 'Poor creature. It probably died after drinking your blood'.
. . .
Thank you for the question! (🥲).
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luza-wayne · 2 months
Text
why people bother with love.
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sawamura daichi x reader
wc: 9.2k
this is the longest fic that i've ever written, omg. i love daichi sm<33
also the story is inspired by taylor swift's song 'mine'! i was listening to it while on shuffle playlist and thought it was so good.
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a happy and lovely family.
it's the farthest from what your family was.
all your parents did was fight at every little thing that can be talked through.
it was also the reason why you and your siblings are not close with each other. they hide or run away whenever they're fighting, which means, always.
but, they did tell you once.
“they were so deeply in love with each other in the past.”
so, just in the past?
i don't understand.
“then, you shouldn't have spent it on useless things!” 
your father's voice made your ears ring. it's in the middle of the night.
they're fighting again. 
this is supposed to be a day for me. i just graduated from elementary school today.
“useless?! you call that useless?!” your mother shouted back.
you decided to get off of the bed and silently walk to where the voices are coming from, the kitchen.
“of course, it is!” your father replied.
“our daughter just graduated and you're saying that buying her a small gift is useless?!” your mother asked.
i knew it. it's about that.
you peeked from the opening in the living room which was connected to the kitchen.
“just tell her ‘congratulations!’ or anything! why bother spending money?! we're not rich!” your father rebutted.
“are you hearing yourself right now, huh?” your mother snickered. “what are you even mad about? it's not even over ¥500?”
“you could've used that ¥500 for something more important! like food stocks or bills!” 
“her, graduating is important! don’t you dare not acknowledge your daughter’s milestone!”
maybe i should just give them back a ¥500 that i saved from my daily allowance? would that stop them from fighting?
“arhg! you and your obtuse actions!” your father slammed the counter with his balled fist.
“what?! you're one to talk! that stupid "friend" of yours who always borrows money from you! where is he now, huh? out there partying and spending the money you lent him! what did he say? "i'll give it back tomorrow!" i never once saw him return the money he borrows, yet you keep on giving and giving him! what are you, a bank?!” your mother snapped.
“shut up!” your father shouted and clicked his tongue. “you always bring that up! you're always like that! i'm tired of you already!”
“guess who's tired of you too?” your mother crossed her arms and stared at your father blankly.
“is that so? then i'm leaving and never going back here!” your father had enough and walked out.
he met your eyes and was surprised for a bit, but he continued walking to the front door.
you looked at your mother.
she still had her arms crossed above her chest, but she clenched her hands tightly and was biting on her lower lip.
“mom, are you not going to run after dad?” you stepped out from hiding.
your mother flinched, but she quickly realized that you must've heard the whole conversation already.
“why would i? it was his decision to leave! i don't care about him anymore! i'm glad i finally got tired of his ass!” she said and went to get water.
what? 
you say that, but why do you look so hurt?
“your hands are quivering, mom.”
as your eyebrows furrowed, you heard the engine starting. you look at the door's direction and run towards it. when you stepped out, you saw your father just hopped on his mini truck.
he saw you running to him. he rolled his window down.
“dad, when are you coming back?” you asked him.
he just smiled achingly at you.
“sorry.” he muttered. you, confused, tilted your 
“don't worry, i'd still be there for you, siblings.” he shortly answered.
“what about mom?” you questioned.
“i don't care anymore. i can't bring myself to love her anymore. sorry.” he said and grabbed the steering wheel tightly. he then said goodbye and drove off.
i don't understand.
“they were so deeply in love with each other in the past.”
did their love for each other fade away?
i really don't understand…
love…
“why does everyone bother with it if it never lasts?”
why do we need to fall in love, just to experience the anguish of losing the feeling of it?
•••
“hurry! hurry! their match is already starting!” your friend pulls your hand, as you follow her lead.
“okay, okay.” you answered with no enthusiasm.
what am i going to do there anyways? i don't even know the rules in volleyball.
“why are we watching a boys volleyball game in the first place?” you asked her.
“it's our school's team! they can represent miyagi in the spring high tournament, if they win against the team they're playing today.” she said,
okay, still didn't anyways why we should be here.
when you two reached the bleachers, your other classmates waved at you and pointed at the seat they reserved for you both.
the first set just finished when you arrived. you just used the cheering megaphone they handed you and just created some noise as the players walked on the court.
“kageyama-sama, do your best!” you heard your friend scream her heart out.
that answers my question. also, what do you mean, "-sama"? you're older than him, right?
you sighed and just continued cheering.
the umpire blew the whistle and signaled that the second set was starting. you watched as a guy with bowl-cut from the opposing team serves.
your eyes widened a bit seeing how hard he serves, you were so sure no one could receive it.
but, the guy was there to break your thoughts.
he easily receives it, making your eyes widened even more.
as soon as he received it, they ran towards the net and he hit the ball over the other team, earning them the first point of the set.
wow. 
your mouth hangs open.
“h-hey,” you called for your friend's attention. “who was that?”
“who? the one who sets?! that's kageyama! he's a firs—”
“no, the one who hits the ball.” you immediately stopped her.
“oh, that's the captain, sawamura daichi, from class 4. i think he's friends with sugawara too.” she answered shortly, now that the topic is not kageyama anymore.
number 1… that means he's the captain, right?
the match continued and they won the set. they lost the third, but won the fourth.
you were hanging on your seat as the set, supposed to be just 15, goes over to 20 and you cling to your friend tightly as the final whistle was heard and karasuno was declared the winner.
“wah! kageyama-sama, congratulations!” your friend bawled out.
“he's amazing too, right?” you said as you clapped, seeing sawamura receive the trophy.
“of course! he's kageyama-sama's teammate, after all!” she said, still dragging kageyama to the conversation.
when it was time to move out, your friend said she needed to go to the toilet, so you went there with her.
as you two passed the entrance to the gym floor, you saw the black uniforms standing there.
oh, they're here.
“sugawara!” your friend suddenly shouted, calling for your classmates' attention. almost all of them looked in your direction. “congratulations!” she said,
“oh! thanks!” sugawara replied, waving his hand in the air with a big smile.
you thought you might as well congratulate your classmate.
“congratulations, sugawara.” you said, not as loud as your friend's voice, but enough for him to hear.
“ah! (y/n), thanks!” he thanked you.
you two then bowed to them and continued to go to the bathroom, all while your friend celebrated that he got kageyama's attention earlier too.
“okay, i got it already. just go and hurry up.” you shut her up when you reached the comfort room.
you just walked to a close bench to the bathroom and took a seat, waiting patiently for your friend to finish.
“hey,” you heard a voice say.
you're not sure whether they're talking to you or not, but you looked up at where it came from.
“you're…” you started and stood on your feet. “sawamura, right?”
“uh, yeah. i'm sawamura.” he said as he reached for his nape and rubbed it with his palms awkwardly.
“you were so awesome in the game earlier. congrats.” you told him and smiled.
“thanks. i actually think i look unsightly during the game, especially when i'm just running and moving on fumes.” he replied sheepishly.
“well, the fact that you think that and yet you still do it just shows how passionate you are about winning.” you uttered. “still, don't worry. you look cool.” you reassured him.
“really? that's a relief.” he said and sighs relievedly.
there was a few seconds of silence after that and you just stared at each other.
“um… why did you… uhm, approach me?” you asked.
he suddenly gets a bit of tint pink shade on his cheeks, that can be easily missed if you were not looking carefully. maybe the reason, you noticed it also was the fact that his bruised on his left cheeks got your attention.
“well, you see… we won against shiratorizawa.” he started and you hummed. “so, we're already qualified for the spring high, i was just wondering if you'll be watching there too.” he asked.
“why? is my presence needed there?” you confusedly asked, making him chortle.
“for me, it definitely does, haha.” he answered, straightforwardly.
it skipped a beat. my heart just did.
i know these feelings very well. it's the feeling i swore not to follow.
i know where these feelings would bring me to.
“i see. i'll look forward to it then.”
i should've declined back then.
•••
“ever since you moved here, it never got quiet here anymore!”
your old woman neighbor is once again shouting in front of your house. 
she's always there and she always just does it whenever sawamura is at work or out for something. it was easy to know since she knows he's a police officer and the police car is not in the parking lot.
you continued to bite your lower lip. 
trying to stop yourself from shouting back at the old woman was harder than you thought.
the neighbors said she has a mental disorder, but still her voice. her voice can easily break a plate or two.
normally, you would just ignore her until she leaves, but today you're not like those days. your menstruation started this morning, and the blood got onto the sheets, so you had changed it. 
moving around irritates you, but you had no choice but to do the chores, before your husband arrives, since it's just you two in the house and you're off to work today.
speaking of your husband, you looked at the clock and saw the time.
‘where are you?’ ‘your shift should've finished a while ago.’ ‘can you go home already?’
you stared at your phone and waited for him to reply, but he didn't. you just stood up and went to the kitchen.
ah, she left. you thought as you managed to peek outside the window while you walked to the kitchen.
thank goodness, finally.
“guess, i should reheat this.” you muttered to yourself and sighed.
you placed the dinner you cooked, inside the microwave. as you wait for it, you remembered that you haven't looked at the mail today yet.
you hurriedly went outside and opened the mailbox.
“huh?” you were surprised to see the mails filled with bills that needed to be paid.
you groaned as you held the envelopes in hand.
it's the same envelope you receive every month, but somehow these envelopes are more irritating to you right now. 
you just closed the mailbox and went inside. you one by one looked through the mail, while you walked back to the kitchen.
and every time you open one, your mood gets worse and worse.
“huh?! why is it so expensive?!” you shouted at the bill you're holding.
we need to spend our money more wisely, even if we're both working.
*ping*
you heard the microwave's sound go off. you immediately took it out forgetting to put on a mitt or even a pot holder.
“ouch!” you screamed. you hurriedly went to the sink and ran the water on it. “damn, what am i doing?”
“i'm home.” sawamura announced as soon as he stepped in.
he's home?!
“argh! wait–” you speed walked to the main door and saw your husband. “welc–” 
you stopped mid-sentence when you saw what he's holding.
“uh, i saw a friend of mine while on my way home, that's why i was late, so i thought i should get you something.” he said and extended his arms, a bouquet of flowers in his hands.
you accepted it, staring at it with a forced smile.
“don't like it?” he asked as he kissed your temple and walked to the living room.
you followed him, still looking at the flowers.
“no… it's just—” you sighed. “you didn't have to buy something this expensive…” you muttered.
“so, you don't like it?” he asked as he took off his uniform.
“no, it's not like that. i'm saying you shouldn't have spent the money on something useless—” you said, but decided to just cut yourself off.
you sighed. “thank you, dai.” walking up to him to hug him.
he returned the embrace, but he knew something was wrong.
we could’ve used the money to pay off our bills instead. you thought as you let go from the hug.
sawamura, puzzled, still decided to just give you a bit of space and not to pry yet. he went to take a short shower, while you prepared the table.
while waiting for him to join you, you looked at the envelopes you were just looking at earlier. your eyes then went back to the bouquet that’s now sitting on the center table in the living room.
you breathed deeply.
am i getting ungrateful for not appreciating his effort on buying that?
you got on your feet and went to get it. 
staring at it, you finally realized how pretty it was. also, it’s your favorite flower.
you can’t remember when was the last time you mentioned to him what your favorite flower was. 
was it when we were on our first date?
you chuckled.
“that guy really knows how to put butterflies in my stomach.”
suddenly, you felt two cold arms wrapped around your waist. you felt him snuggle his nose on your nook of neck.
“dai, stop it. i'm reeking of sweat.” you chortled as you felt a bit tickled by his now growing stubble.
he buried his nose deeper and even inhaled your scent like a man who just regained his sense of smell.
“smells like a pheromone for me.” he replied and lifted you up. 
hooking his arms behind your knees and walking to the table. he sat you down on the chair and took a seat adjacent to yours.
as he was about to scoop rice for both of you, you reached out to his cheeks and gave him a peck. he was taken aback, but then smiled at you. he held your hand on his cheeks and brought it to his lips, kissing the back of it.
“thank you for the flowers, dai.” you told him.
“anything for you, babe.” he answered.
maybe i was just thinking a bit too much about our bills. i should just appreciate that he got me these flowers.
“mrs. sawamura, please redo this.” your team leader sternly said.
you looked up from your desk and met with an eyes burning and a face that’s barely containing their anger.
“yes?” you asked while your hand was holding the lunch you were about to eat at the canteen.
“there are a lot of inaccurate reports and miscalculated estimates. what are you even doing? do you want our team to lose this project because of you?” she added and slammed the folder on your desk.
“but—” none of those are my jobs though.
i might probably have to add this to my piles of to-do work.
she was about to walk away, when she suddenly looked back.
“and i want them done today.” she said lastly, before walking back to her posts and leaving you with wide eyes.
all of this by today?!
“there’s no way i can finish this today.” you whispered and slumped your back to the chair.
i might need to stay for over time.
as you set your lunch box down on your desk, your phone vibrated. you pulled it out of your vest’s pocket and saw a message notification from your younger sister, who’s in college.
- we’re running out of mom’s medication. - she’s always staring and thinking about a lot of things, i’m afraid it might turn into depression. - and brother’s med maintenance too. - it’ll only last until tomorrow. - we need extra money, but i already used my income from my part-time job to pay off the debts when i borrowed money from my friend to pay for my tuition. she said she badly needed the money. -if you have extra money, can you send us some for your mother and brother? - i’ll try asking someone too.
you let out a frustrated sigh. you grit your teeth and lower your head.
just how bad will this day get?
you repositioned your body. taking deep breaths. you picked up your phone again and replied to your sister.
- no, it’s fine. i have some extra here. i received a bonus yesterday. i’ll send it to you and pay for the remaining balance on your tuition too. don’t forget their meds. let me know how much all in total. thanks for always looking out for them. take care there.
you put down your phone and covered your face with your hands.
well, there goes my bonus. i still haven’t paid for the other bills that i’m supposed to pay for.
“(y/n), you okay?” your workmate asked.
you just nodded and told him you’re okay.
i need to save money.
hours have passed since your supposed time to go home, but here you are redoing the whole project that wasn’t even your doing, yet forced to redo so.
“this… is wrong. who the hell put it here?” you said to yourself and immediately fixed it.
thankfully, you are already almost done with it. just a bit more and you can already give it to your team leader. she seemed to stay late too and was working on another project.
that doesn’t mean she should have me revise these mistakes when i wasn't even the one who did it.
“and… there! all done!” you raised your arms in the air and stretched your back.
“finally!” you expressed slumping your body to the chair with relief.
you immediately went to pass it to your leader. she didn’t even bother looking up at you and just said a monotone of “good work, you can go home now.” but, you could care less at this moment, you just want to get it over with and go home and take a bath and sleep.
as you were arranging your belongings, you remembered that you turned your phone off, in order to concentrate more.
you slid your bag on your shoulder and walked to the elevator. you waited for the phone to turn on. you’re the only one inside, so your mind wandered off while waiting to reach the ground floor and for your phone.
should i get a part time job too? ever since my brother got caught up in a motorcycle accident, it feels like money has been slipping out the moment i got them on my hands. 
you heard a ping and the door finally opened, the same time as your phone turned on too. while walking to the door, your notifications got bombed with messages from your husband.
- can’t wait to have dinner with you <3 - i think i might arrive a bit earlier than our call time - the chief will let us out early today - i’ll be waiting for you, but you don’t have to rush, okay? - are you on ‘do not disturb’ mode? - okay, you might be busy right now - good luck on your work, i love you
- i just got out, i’ll be passing by the house for a moment to change the car and maybe take a quick shower too - still no reply? :( - don’t overwork yourself too much please - i’ll be driving so i might not see your reply - i love you
- i’m on my way to the resto - i’m so excited haha - i’ll be waiting there for you - i’ll be sure to drive safely, because that’s what you always say when i say i’m about to drive - see you there, i love you
- i’m here already, but no need to rush - i’m just early by half an hour - just let me know if you’re seeing these messages - be safe on your way here, i love you
- hey, it’s been two hours already - are you still tied up with your work? - let me know if i should wait for you or pick you up at your work - i can still wait for you though - please reply, babe - i’m getting a bit worried now - reply to me please, i love you
- i just contacted your colleague - he told me you’re staying overtime to finish some things, but couldn’t you tell me sooner? - i’m still waiting here for about four hours now - i’m going home now - at least reply to me once you’ve seen this
oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! i completely forgot about our dinner!
you hurriedly ran to call a taxi, knowing that the train was about to close by the time.
i knew something important slipped my mind earlier! i can’t believe it was the date with my husband!
you told the driver the destination of your travel, while also asking him if he can make it so you will arrive faster there. of course, he said he can’t drive recklessly, but he’ll try to drive faster.
while the taxi driver did his job, you tried to reply to your daichi. you explained that you had your phone off, that's why you didn’t receive his messages. the thing is, your messages are going through but he’s not responding to your message.
gosh, i think he’s really mad. what should i do when i get home? we can just have another dinner. ugh, it’s too pricey. you sighed.
after a few minutes, the taxi finally arrived at the street of your house. you told him it’s okay to drop you off here and paid him. while walking to your house, your stomach churns with anxiety as you might find daichi mad.
as you reached your gated house, you searched for your keys only for you to realize that you didn’t bring it with you when you left the house. you contemplated whether to call daichi and have him open the gate for you or just jump over the gate.
while thinking, you suddenly heard the clicking sounds of the gate being opened. you turn around to see your husband in his shorts and t-shirt. he’s not in his night wear yet, so he must’ve been doing some work in his office, just like what he usually does when he gets some free time after eating dinner, though it usually doesn't take this long for him to do those works.
“o-oh, you’re still awake? i didn’t wake you up, right?” you asked, trying not to make it awkward.
“no.” he flatly said. 
he finally opened the gate and then waited for you to step inside, without uttering another word. you walked to the front door and opened it, going inside. you left the door open for him.
you set your coat on the rack and followed daichi with your eyes as he closed the front door and walked past you after throwing the keys in the bowl. you also saw your keys there.
i knew it he’s mad.
you walked to the living room to see him opening the television and munching on some chips. seeing this, you felt your stomach grumble. you went to the kitchen and found a bowl of some hot miso soup. your stomach felt even hungrier.
but, i need to talk to dai. you closed your eyes and accepted your hunger later.
you were about to walk to where daichi was when he suddenly stood up and went to the bathroom. he also took a towel, so it seems like he’ll take a shower.
guess, i should eat first then.
after eating and washing the dishes, since it’s only the ones you eat with anyways, you went to change your clothes hurriedly, in case daichi finishes his shower already.
when you went back to the living room, there you saw him sitting on the couch, eyes glued to the television. 
you walked to him and called his name.
“dai.” he didn’t look at you.
“dai. i forgot about our dinner.” you said and took a seat next to him, he looked at you.
i should just explain it to him and get this over with.
“our team leader was being a little bitchy earlier and gave me work i’m not even supposed to do, so i turned off my phone—” you were telling him about what happened earlier, when he suddenly cut you off.
“is it that hard to remember to tell me that you’re taking an overtime?” he stated. staring at you with a straight face.
“huh?” you asked, deflecting his straightforwardness.
“i’m pissed off that you made me wait for about four hours, but i’m more pissed about the fact that you can’t even tell me that you’re having overtime.” he uttered.
it’s like something just snapped in your mind. you know you’re the one who should apologize for forgetting about your date and even making him wait. but, it must’ve been the awful day that you had that’s getting the best of you right now.
“why is it such a big thing to tell you about that?” you asked him with a stress on the word ‘big thing’.
he furrowed your brows and was taken aback by your question. did you really just ask him why is that a big thing?
he stood up and was still not breaking eye contact with you.
“maybe it’s because i’m your husband, (y/n).” he answered back, now emphasizing his words. “of course, i need to know because i get worried why you aren’t back yet when your working hours are already done.” 
you raised your eyebrow.
“if you were that worried, then you should’ve come to my workplace and checked up on me.” you said and then stood up too, facing him.
“i was about to, when your co-worker replied to me and said you already have taken an overtime and possibly forgotten about our reservation!” he rebutted, his voice getting louder.
“then it's good timing! that was a waste of money anyways, we can always just eat somewhere cheap!” you shouted back.
“it’s you who wanted to eat there!” he pointed at you.
“i never said that! it’s you who wanted to take me there!” you told him and took a step forward.
“why are you always pushing the blame onto someone else whenever you're up against a corner?!” he gritted through his teeth.
“huh?! when did i ever do that—” you were about to talk when he talked over you.
and it was when you realized this is going like what happened with your parents.
“you never owe up to your mistakes, i always try to understand you because i love you, but (y/n), i’m a human too! i have a limit!” he started.
“wha—” before you could even finish, he added something that breaks your heart.
“i’m tired of you always being like that!” he said and stormed off to the bedroom.
you stood there in the middle of the living room speechless. 
your world seems to be spinning yet you’re not paying attention to it, you're more focused on the heavy feeling on your chest. it’s so heavy, it feels like your heart has fallen to your stomach and now you can feel the churning of it too.
your legs felt wobbly, you had no choice but to sit back down on the couch. your hand found its way to your chest.
it hurts here.
your eyesight started becoming watery.
“you’re always like that! i’m tired of you already!” “guess who’s tired of you too?” “is that so? then i’m leaving and never going back here!”
no! stop, stop, stop, stop!
don’t think about what happened to mom and dad!
“then i’m leaving and never going back here!”
stop! please!
you know daichi won’t leave you, right?!
he won’t leave you!
he won’t leave you!
he won’t.
…right?
i just have to apologize—
“they were so deeply in love with each other in the past.”
no…
i still love daichi!
stop thinking like that!
with all these thoughts, you didn’t even realize how much you’re crying, but somehow not making any sounds. your body is still adapted to your childhood habit of immediately covering your mouth and nose when crying in order not to let anyone hear it.
it’s a habit that started the night you realized that you’re the reason why your parents have broken off. if you didn’t ask your mother for a gift that day, then there might be a chance that your family is still together.
your body slid and now you’re lying on the couch sideways, still covering your mouth and nose.
i still love daichi.
but, daichi’s tired of me already.
i knew love never lasts, but i thought it might be different with daichi. i was too naive to think love would treat me differently than my parents.
everything comes and goes.
in the end, it was a cycle.
not the love, but what happened with my parents’ love story and mine.
it will never last. love is.
waiting for a bit until you stopped crying, you picked up your coat again and put it on. you were about to take your keys, but realized you don’t need it anymore. before leaving, you remembered one thing. you walked back to the living room and took off your ring, setting it down on the table, all while holding back your tears again.
daichi’s the type to sleep his anger until he calmed down, so you didn’t have to think that he might pop out suddenly and ask you where are you going.
you have already booked a taxi to take you somewhere that might not be a safe haven for you, but still has a deep hold to you.
“can you take me here?” you said to the driver and he said he can and then quietly drove you there.
you turned your phone off to avoid someone calling you. you slept on your way there and when you felt the car stop for a bit too long, you immediately opened your eyes. a bittersweet smile appeared on your face as you stared at the house from the window.
you thanked the driver and hopped out of the taxi. you stood in front of the house unlighted because it’s already midnight, though to you it looked more gloomy rather than creepy.
one of the rooms is still with lights on, you grabbed your phone and messaged your sister. a few moments later, she was out of the house, wearing her pajamas, surprised to find her sister out of the house in the middle of the night.
as much as how surprised she was, she knew it was out of ordinary for you to show up in front of the house on a random day. she knew you had your reasons, but never forced you to tell her about it. it’s not like you’ll travel for about three hours just to visit them, just because you thought about it, what’s more it’s in the middle of the night.
she helped you get your room ready, she can see from your eyes that you needed to rest your body and mind. when it was already done, you thanked her and encouraged her about the plates she’s finishing, that's why she’s staying up late.
you laid on your bed, the same bed that has been with you with everything. it is nostalgic to think about the memories, but you can’t help but think about those times where the family is still complete and somehow you are acting like a real family.
“i’m back. you’re seeing another pathetic side of me.” you muttered to yourself, referring to the bed and realized that maybe it’s the whole room too.
you turned your eyes to the pictures stuck on your walls. your lips quivered again as you stare at the picture you put up in the past of you and daichi when you had an aquarium date. 
it’s a picture of you two kissing that was perfectly photobombed by a large stingray, that made both of you look like you had wings.
“why do humans fall in love? it hurts my heart, yet i can’t stop loving the man i married.” you uttered as a tear fell out of your eyes.
you were about to close your eyes, when suddenly you heard a knock on your door. you looked up and stared at it, thinking it could be your imagination. again, three knocks came. you immediately went to get whoever it was. did your little sister forget something? or did you?
opening the door, you were greeted by your mother in a wheelchair. smiling up at you.
“i knew it. you came home, i see.” she said, still smiling affectionately at you.
“mom, why are you still awake?” you asked, kneeling in front of her. you held her hand and returned the smile.
“i was asleep, but i woke up when i heard your bedroom’s door being opened.” she explained and tapped you, asking you to stand up.
“huh? ah…” you were puzzled by what she said, but then remembered it.
“your door lets out a peculiar sound every time it opens and closes, right?” she chuckled and pointed at your balcony. 
you went behind her and pushed the wheelchair to your balcony, the breeze was chilly, so you went to your dresser and looked for something thick to cover your frail mother’s body. you came back with a jacket, and wrapped it over her shoulders while she was staring at the star-filled sky.
“it’s beautiful.” she spoke. 
you looked up and truthfully, it was beautiful but you were not in the mood to admire them. you just answered her with a simple, “yeah.”
for a moment, it was quiet. the only sounds you’re hearing are the sound of the wind brushing against the trees and leaves and the sound of the crickets.
it was quite, you thought it would be okay to just stay like this, but you know somewhere someone would speak up. it was your mother who did.
“did something happen at your house?” she finally asked the same question your little sister wanted to ask but decided not to.
you tried to stay quiet, but you were aware you have to, sooner or later, need to tell them the reason rather than keeping them in the dark.
and yet, you can’t find the courage to speak.
your mother smiled.
again, it was quiet. 
for a few minutes, it stayed quiet. actually, you think it might actually go until half an hour. half an hour of letting the noises of nature fill both of your ears, half an hour of feeling the cold blow of the midnight wind on your skin.
you looked down at your mother and noticed that she’s just staring at something far. it was like her mind was occupied by something.
“mom,” you called, she answered you by humming, “what are you thinking about?”
“i’m thinking about your father.” she said lightly.
you were surprised. the topic about your father was like a forbidden one, you and your siblings never talked about your father when in presence of your mother, yet she just told you that he’s running in her mind right now. 
i thought she hated him.
“why?” you asked.
she smiled weakly.
“i’m thinking that if i followed him back then, maybe i would be happy right now.” your eyes widened.
she still remember that? and… she regrets not running after him? but, he’s…
“i thought you said you didn’t love him anymore?”
she chuckled.
“i thought so too.”
it’s saturday and almost four o'clock in the morning, daichi was woken up by his alarm clock, he forgot to turn off before sleeping. it was already weird, because usually he never hears it. it was you who got woken up by it first and then turned it off. after that, you’ll be nudging him and even getting on top of him with your whole body to wake him up.
his body feels so tired. he stretched his arms out, only to feel the cold sheet next to him. he sprung up on his ass. 
“where is—” 
he shut his eyes tight when he remembered what happened last night.
“damn it. i decided to sleep again while i’m mad. i should stop doing that. she doesn't like it either.” he muttered as he got off the bed and stretched out his body.
he went outside the room to get water and find you. he searched the living room with his eyes, but he didn’t see you, he walked to the kitchen and you weren’t there either.
maybe in the bathroom? he thought and his feet dragged him there.
no. you weren’t there.
at this point, he was ignoring the thumping sounds of his heart. there’s no way you did what he’s thinking… right?
he went outside, even though he knows himself it’s ridiculous, to see you watering the plants. but, still there’s no sign of you.
he went back inside and searched every room, but still no one jumped out and said that you were just playing hide-and-seek with a just-woken-up him.
where were you?
he went to sit on the couch. short and fast breaths taking over his lungs.
please just tell me you went out to jog. or that you went to shop this early in the morning. anything that could be outrageous to do at this time you can do it and he wouldn’t even laugh. just show up before his eyes and calm down his heart getting scared minute by minute that he might’ve ruined everything last night.
“where are you, baby? please, just this once let it be a joke.” his said with a shaking voice. 
he looked down and finally saw it. the ring you left, before you went and left the house.
daichi laughed. 
“now, if this is a nightmare, i fucking hate it, haha.” he laughed as he picked it up with trembling fingers. 
it wasn’t happening. if he closes his eyes and opens it again, he’ll find you sleeping soundly beside him.
but it didn’t.
he clutched the ring in his palms as he wobbly stood up and went to the bedroom to get his phone. maybe if he calls you and apologizes, he can fix this relationship.
but, it wasn’t going through.
“did she block me already? please don’t. i’ll apologize for everything i did and said. just don’t leave me.” he muttered, shaking voice and tears finally escaping his eyes.
he kissed the ring, before deciding to get on his feet.
he’s not letting this relationship end, if he had to eat dirt for you to forgive him, he’ll go out of his way to search for the dirtiest mud and eat it for you. 
he checked the closet. his line of work will become handy to him, but he didn’t think that it’ll be useful in this way. you didn’t take any clothes with you. so, there’s a high chance that you’ll go somewhere you have a stock of clothes with them. but, the friend you’re always staying over whenever you have a girl’s night, is out of town right now and the other is attending a party just like what you’ve told him.
as much as he doesn't want to say it, he knows that you’re trying to save money, so you probably won’t stay at a hotel.
he picked up his jacket, phone and wallet.
he knows the only place where you could be.
“you thought so too?” you repeated.
“i thought i was tired of him, that i didn’t love him anymore.” she said, “but, i was wrong.” she added.
how can you love someone who hurt you just by thinking about them?
she looked up at you and smiled.
“i realized, i was not tired of loving him.” she looked forward again. “rather, i was tired of our fights. i was tired of always exchanging shouts with him, but i never stopped loving him. ever since that night, never a day passed that i haven’t thought about how i should’ve run after him and told him not to leave me, us.”
your lips quiver while listening. you always made sure not to talk about your father thinking that your mother would hate it, not knowing that everyday she reminisces about their relationship.
again, she looked up at you, but now with a warmer and larger smile.
“so, i thought once i get better, i’ll try and win your father back, even if it took too many years, haha.” she happily said, before looking back in front.
you weren’t able to contain it anymore, you shed a tear for your mother. you bend down and hug her from behind. she was startled when you suddenly wrapped your arms around her, but still caressed her daughter’s head, just like how she used to whenever she cries in her arms. you were happy to see your mother’s genuine smile, a smile that isn’t forced, a smile that isn’t there to show that she’s okay, so you don’t have to worry. you were happy, but you can’t help but cry.
knowing damn well that your father has already married someone else and is having his third child.
you know that and yet, you can’t tell her that. you don’t want to. not when she just finds inspiration to be well again.
but, you didn’t expect to hear what she said next.
“your father… he already found someone else, didn’t he?” she suddenly said that it made you freeze.
you felt wet drops on your arms.
“i-i— he—” you wanted to lie, but can’t bring another heartbreak to your mother by lying.
“i know, because you’re my child.” she sobbed and tears fell out of her eyes like waterfalls. “and i know, because that’s just the man i knew and loved.”
you went in front of her and hugged her by her waist, bawling like a little child.
“sorry, sorry, sorry, mom… it was my fault… i’ve always known it was because of me… if i didn’t ask you for a gift, maybe he would still be with us… mom, i’m sorry… because of me… i���m sorry… i’m sorry… i’m sorry… please, forgive me…” you cried and cried, begging your mother for forgiveness.
your mother who is also crying, but still manages to wipe your tears, nods her head with everything you say to let you know she’s listening. 
you kept on apologizing to her and she listened to everything. when you ran out of breath, she took this chance to calm you down. 
“(y/n), look at me.” she said as she cupped your cheeks, you looked at her with a messy face and probably snot coming out of your nose. “never have i ever thought that it was your fault. your small gift was not the reason we ended the relationship. i didn’t know that you’ve always carried the guilt on your back thinking that it was your fault. i’m sorry for never noticing.” she affirmed.
“it was not your fault, (y/n).”
this made you teary again.
“mom… thank you…” you cried to her as you held her hands that were on your cheeks. closing your eyes to feel the warmth of her palms in the coldness of the breeze.
“with that said, (y/n)...” she called. you opened your eyes and saw another of her real smiles.
“don’t make the same mistake as me.” 
it was a short sentence, yet it rang your ears so loud, you can’t hear anything else except that.
your lips showed a smile, a quivering and forced smile. your tears never stopped dropping, actually your eyes produced more.
“i’m sorry, mom. but i think i already did.” you cried, resting your head on her thighs. “it wasn’t your mistake that i’ve committed, but dad’s.” you added.
“i ran away.” you hiccuped, “i thought everything would be the same, so i ran away. i was scared to face it.” 
your mother made you raise your head. your eyes are red from crying so much and yet you felt like you haven’t let everything out. your chest still feels heavy. you want to cry everything out, but thoughts fill in double with every tear that escapes your eye. you just want to cry it out, but the longer you cry, the more it hurts.
“mom, what should i do?” you asked her, looking up at her. sniffing and catching your breath.
“i…” you stopped to inhale. “i love daichi, but i’m scared. what if it's all temporary. what if our love fades?”
“it was my fault. it’s always been my fault.” you wiped your eyes with your hands, only to be replaced by another one. “i… i don’t want to leave him, mom…”
“dear, calm down.” your mother squished your cheeks. “i’m sure you realize that whatever you did to your husband was wrong, but you don’t have to worry.” she said, making you confused.
“i was the one who ran away… what if he didn’t run after me?” you asked.
“then you’ll be the one who needs to go back to him. you need to talk it out.” she ran her hands on your hair. “you wouldn’t want to turn out like me, right?” she muttered, giving you a relieved smile. 
she knows that you already know what to do and that no matter what happens, deep inside you, you didn’t want to be something you saw happen to her and your father. she must’ve been subconsciously aware that you were afraid to fall in love. she saw when you looked at others with partners, not with an envious eyes, but rather a confused one.
she realized just now, that she might have been the reason why you think like that. with what turned out to be your mother and father’s relationship, maybe it’s understandable why you thought love fades along with the relationship. but, you’re wrong. after all, look at her. she will always love the man that was with her for most of her happiest moments. she’ll never stop loving him.
but, she knows it’s different for the both of you.
because, she saw something in daichi that your father has never done and never will. she knew from the day you introduced him to her. 
your father never looked at her the same way daichi looked at you whenever you’re not looking.
so, she knows. she knows it won’t turn as tragic as her story.
when she realized, you have already calmed down. you’re still sniffing and wiping your tear stains, but you’ve controlled it.
“let’s go. it’s getting late and you haven’t slept yet.” she tapped your back. you could only reply with a nod. 
you stood up and helped your mother turn her wheelchair around. you helped her get to her bedroom, but before walking back to your room, you thanked her.
“thank you, mom.” you said. she looked at you and smiled. “thank you for being the best.” you kissed her on her forehead and said good nights to each other.
you went back to your room and laid on the bed. you reached for your phone. your fingers fiddled whether to turn it on or not.
in the end, you chose not to. 
you know what to do right now, but needed more courage to commence it.
“i should get some sleep first.” you muttered, your body finally processing the amount of tiredness your body felt yesterday and today.
i’m going back to daichi. i don’t want to lose him.
the sun was up and it was hitting your eyelid. you were too tired and sleepy, you forgot to lay out the blinds.
you were about to turn your body to the side, when something was holding you by your waist. you were still feeling groggy, but you paid no attention to it. but, then you remembered you’re in your room, not at your house, but your mother’s house.
you swung your head sideways and saw daichi sleeping next to you. your mouth was wide open and was surprised.
how did he get here this early in the morning?
you stared at his handsome face that was wrinkled by his furrowed brows. you wanted to laugh, because that was his face every time he dreams about a weird but cute creature that he told you about before.. you tried to get out of his chain-like hold. after many unsuccessful attempts, you finally managed to free yourself. 
you sat on the edge of the bed as you felt your throat was so dry after that crying you did. you were about to get up when you caught daichi and started moving his hands.
he’s searching for me. you thought. 
you were on your way to reach for his hands, when he suddenly sprang up with wide eyes.
“(y/n)!” he called out.
you jolted because of his sudden movements. he was frantically rubbing his eyes in order to get that clear view of the room. his gestures made you worry, so you held and stopped his hands from doing so.
“dai, i’m here.” you told him, putting his hands down along with yours. “good morning.”
his eyesight has finally adjusted and you were his first view. 
your beautiful face that puts a blush on his cheeks. your sweet smile that calms his mind. your soft touches that makes him weak.
staring at your face, he realized that he’s not in a nightmare anymore. just like what happened earlier when we woke up for the first time today. you’re here in front of him, greeting him good morning just like always.
he pulled your hands to his face, feeling up the warmth it gives.
“g-good morning.” he replied, his voice cracking up from holding back his cry.
you smiled watching your husband snuggle himself to your hands, but it soon faded when you realized how scared and hurt he must’ve been when you suddenly disappeared.
“dai—” before you could even finish calling him, you suddenly found yourself caught by daichi’s arms again.
he buried his face on your chest and hugged you tight, tighter than he even did before.
“why…?” he muttered, words were muffled, but you can still hear him clearly.
“dai?” you called.
“why did you leave? you could’ve just slapped me. you could’ve just kicked me. you could’ve punched me. you could’ve told me to sleep outside. you can pull my hair, poke my eyes, hit my shin, step on my toes, throw all my clothes, burn them, spend all my money, cut my cards and everything to let out your frustrations and calm your anger, but why? why did you think of leaving me?” he reasoned.
you could feel your clothes getting wet, right where his eyes met your chest. his fingers on your back grasping onto your fabric. you wrapped your arms around his back.
“i was so scared. i thought i might never see you again. i thought we’ll never kiss each other good nights and good mornings again. i thought i’ll never be able to hold you like this anymore.” he continued.
“i’m sorry, i’m sorry. please don’t be mad at me anymore. i didn’t think through what was coming out of my mouth. i won’t ever do that again, please don’t leave me. i love you. you know, i love you so much, right?” he begged, finally looking up at you.
his eyes were filled with tears, just like how you were earlier. his face was desperate for your answer.
“dai.” you started. you pushed him away for a bit to look at him directly. he didn’t want to at first, but still complied with what you wanted, only if he held your hand. he’s scared that you might disappear from him again.
“why are you the one apologizing? it was my fault it all happened.” you told him, he was about to reply to you, but you halted him.
“i completely forgot our dinner. i forgot to message you about staying late to finish my work and i didn’t apologize for both. i got mad when you were only worried about me. i lied about not wanting to eat there and begged you for it.” you continued, looking at him straight in the eyes.
“and you’re right about it. i’m sorry for always dodging to own up for my own mistakes. i was scared that everything might be happening because of me again. i ran away from them, so i will not be blamed for it. it’s a bad habit that i need to work on.” you said, smiling at him.
you raised both of your hands to your chest level.
“and thank you for always understanding me. thank you for being so patient with me. i’m very lucky to have someone like you beside me.” you then went and hugged him.
“i’m supposed to be the one saying it.” you added.
“saying what?” he confusedly asked, but still hugged you back tightly.
“i’m going to be selfish and ask for it. i might be tiring to deal with at times, but please don’t leave me, daichi.” you said.
he suddenly chuckled.
“then that would make us both selfish then, since we're asking for the same thing.” he said before pulling you to his lap.
he sat you down there and wiped some tears that were escaping your eyes. he held your cheek with one hand and yours immediately followed it, holding his below your hands. he angled both of your heads and made your foreheads touch each other.
“i won’t promise that there will never be a fight anymore, but there’s one thing i will promise.”
you smiled when you realized that you know what he’s going to say next.
“i promise i’ll love you for eternity.” you said in chorus, making you two laugh.
you two laid in bed for a few minutes, before going down and eating breakfast with everyone. you ate in peace knowing you learned that maybe even just a little bit, you finally understand why.
the reason why people bother with love.
sometimes you will just find someone who will make you risk getting hurt as long as you get to be with them. sometimes it might not turn out the way you expected it, but sometimes when you overcome it and still be with them, it could be the greatest thing that would happen to you.
sawamura daichi, thank you for making me take the risk.
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hope you enjoyed it! stay hydrated you all, it's so hot!
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