#these characters are so awful to tag lets be honest

[orphetoon]

why shouldn't i draw more totk roleswap its only been (checks watch) two years

[zepskies]

Hi Zep!! I love your writing so much!

How do you think Dean/Beau/ Ben would react to a surprise pregnancy and if the reader was unsure of keeping it?

Hi there! Aw thank you, anon. 💜

I know you asked me this a while back, but to be honest this is a touchy subject, so I wasn't sure if I wanted to answer it. All I can do is give my honest thoughts based on what I know of these three characters, with all their flaws and personality traits and humanity that goes along with that.

Headcanon: How Dean Winchester, Beau Arlen, and Soldier Boy (Ben) would react to a surprise pregnancy.

(And if you weren't sure about keeping it.)

Tags/Warnings: Established relationship, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff.

Dean Winchester

Once Dean gets past the initial shock, and the inevitable "how did this happen??!", he remembers just how he could've gotten you pregnant. Part of him wants to smile at the memory.

Good times.

He slowly realizes that he's...he's happy.

He never thought that he'd have any piece of "normal" after the way things ended with Lisa. Hell, he never thought he'd find what he had with you, let alone have a kid.

He hasn't told you this, because he's locked it deep within himself and hasn't allowed himself to open that door, but the part of Dean that considered what he would leave behind on this earth if he died--the part of him that wanted a family, is still there, beating in his heart. Maybe now he's finally getting his chance.

But he focuses on you.

He gauges your reaction, and his urge to smile falls away when he realizes you're more nervous and freaked out than excited.

Dean sits down with you, taking your hands to calm you down. He suppresses his own feelings on this for a moment, and he asks you the important question.

"What do you wanna do?"

You look up into his eyes, and you really don't know. The hunting lifestyle you both lead, how can you bring a child into this? Would that be right? Are you even ready to be a mom? Are you even capable?

"I don't know if I can..." you confess. "Dean, I don't know if I'm ready."

It breaks Dean's heart, though he tries not to show it.

For once, he thinks hard about what he's going to say next.

Eventually, he takes a deep breath and squeezes your hands.

"I get it," he says. "Whatever you want to do here, I'll back you up. But for the record, I'm right here with you. I might be screwed to hell in ways that I can't even...but I got no doubts about you, sweetheart. And I know we could do this together..."

If that's what you want. The rest is implied through his eyes. You read it there, clear as day.

You try blinking your tears away. When that fails, you sink into Dean's warm embrace and let him hold you. You press a lingering kiss against his prickly cheek in a wordless thank you. And I love you.

For now, you know that he's with you, and he's not going to let you go.

Beau Arlen

Like Dean, Beau would go through similar rounds of Oh, dear sweet Lord, and holy shit.

He thought you and him had been careful, damn it! But, apparently he's more potent than he thought he was.

For a few moments, it's just pure unadulterated silence between you two...until he looks over at you and tries to figure out what you're thinking.

He's got a half-grown daughter, sixteen going on seventeen. He's approaching his mid-40s. He hadn't even been thinking about the possibility of another kid...at least not yet.

Though he can admit, the thought of having kids with you makes him smile.

"So, uh..." he trails, earning your teary-eyed expression. He softens. "Aw, darlin'. Come 'ere."

He wraps you up in his arms and holds you close. You bury your face into his neck and sniffle, holding onto him tightly.

You love Beau. You truly, truly do, but you don't know if you're ready for this. You had plans, things you wanted to do, things you feel you have to do.

"I don't know, Beau. I don't know what to do," you admit. You don't want to hurt him, even though you know that you are. You can see it in his eyes when you pull back to look at him, though he tries to hide it.

"I'm not going anywhere. You know that, right?" he says. His voice is low and steady. He rubs your back to try and calm you down.

It starts to work. You nod and heave a shaky sigh.

Then you steel yourself, and you work past the fear making your chest tight to ask him an important question.

"What if I tell you that I'm not ready?" you ask.

For once in his life, Beau is quiet. He takes a long beat. So long that your heart begins to break.

But he does answer.

"Then I'd tell you...that I love you," he says. "That I'm with you. That I'll be with you, come whatever. But I gotta tell you...I got no problem being an old-ass dad. If I've got double-knee replacements in my future, then that's just what I gotta do. I'll break my hand building the crib and the porch swing. Hell, I'll build a whole damn tree house."

You can't help but break into giggles through your tears, in the way only Beau manages to accomplish. You stroke his cheek and rest easier against him.

Your heart eases quite a lot just being in Beau's supportive embrace.

Soldier Boy (Ben)

Ben isn't all that shocked when you tell him that you're pregnant.

His surprise quickly fades into a pleased grin, and he pulls you into his lap to kiss you. Fucking finally...

But he stops short, realizing that you're not as happy as he expected you to be. Actually, you look anxious, and even scared.

"What's the matter?" he asks, his voice deep and direct.

You hesitate to meet his gaze, but you gain the courage to do so, resting a hand on his chest.

"Ben, I wanted to be honest with you, and so I am. I'm just...I'm not sure about this."

His brows furrow. "What's not to be sure about?"

Your gaze drops from his, making him frown. Upset begin to rise in his chest, disguised as anger. When you rise to get off his lap, he grasps your hand to stop you from walking away from him.

"Hey..." But then it hits him. The realization dawns, and deep inside, it hurts him. "You better not be saying what I think you're fucking saying."

Tears begin to well up in your eyes. Your heart clenches tight in pain just watching him work it out in his mind. You try to tug your hand out of his.

"Ben, please. Don't make this harder for me--"

He stands, but doesn't let go of you.

"What, you think I won't take care of you? You think I wouldn't take care of my own kid?" he says angrily.

"That's not it!" you say, shaking your head. "I just need some time to think, for Christ's sake!"

"What's there to think about? If you give a shit about us, about what we have? What, all of that isn't fucking good enough for you?" Ben says incredulously, gesturing at the home you two live in, and the life he thought you were happy with. "What the fuck is the problem?"

You look up at him in frustration with tears in your eyes, slipping down your cheeks. You shake your head at him.

This," you say. "This is the problem."

This time, when you tug sharply against his hold, Ben actually lets you go. You walk away from him and slam the door to your bedroom.

Ben just stands there for a while. The silence is only broken when he can hear you in the bedroom, trying to muffle your weeping.

Something unsavory churns in Ben's chest, squeezing tight around his heart. It's the sting of regret, both unfamiliar and irritating.

Blowing out a sigh, Ben cards his fingers through his hair. He can either stand here like an idiot, or he can do something worthwhile.

He goes to you. You haven't locked the door (not that that would matter), so he opens it. He sees you burrowed under the covers, laying on your side away from him. You turn away from him again when he approaches.

Almost hesitantly, he sits down beside you, smoothing a hand over your hair.

"Sweetheart, you're gonna have everything you need. You don't need to worry about anything," he says.

"I told you, it's not about that," you say sharply. "It's not about money, or being comfortable."

Ben endeavors to be calm. He counts to five in his mind, then he squeezes your shoulder, taking pains to be gentle.

"Then what's it about?"

After a beat, you finally turn around to face him.

"I just don't know if I'm ready for this," you admit. "We haven't been together that long, and I..."

Ben shakes his head. He strokes your cheek with his thumb.

"Don't worry about that," he says. He hesitates to say anything more.

The truth is, he cares about you more than he's been willing to express. The thought of you leaving him, or even not going through with this pregnancy--both cut him down to the bone.

Is it that you don't trust him? Do you not trust yourself? He doesn't understand all of what's in your head, but if the reason you're not sure about having his kid really is because of him, then...

His curled fingers brush along your jaw and prop under your chin, until your eyes meet his.

"Look, whatever reservations you have about me, just know this," he says. "I'm not going anywhere."

You sigh softly. You know how long Ben has wanted to be a father. You know he wants a family. You don't want to take that away from him, but you also need to protect yourself.

You consider his words carefully, as well as his face, and you see that he actually means it. You believe him.

It doesn't take away other concerns you have, but it's a start.

You sit up in bed, letting the sheets slip away from you. You reach up a hand to cup his bearded cheek.

He lets you guide him down to kiss you, his arm wrapping around you strong, but noticeably gentle. Tears sting behind your closed eyelids.

Maybe he is ready to be a father, and a better man.

AN: 😮‍💨 This one was angsty, huh? I think Ben's part was the one that held me up the most. It still assumes he's had some character growth from having a "real," actually caring relationship, but I tried not to sugarcoat what I think his reaction would be.

Let me know what you think! 💜

Join My Patreon 🌟 Get early access to new stories, bonus content, and first looks at upcoming stories, send me requests, and more!

Dean Winchester Imagines

Dean Winchester Masterlist

Beau Arlen Masterlist

Soldier Boy Masterlist

Main Masterlist 

Dean, Beau + Soldier Boy Tag List (Part 1)

If you would like to get notified every time I post a story, feel free to follow my side blog @zepskieswrites with notifications on so you don't miss out. 💜

@hobby27 @kazsrm67 @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @mostlymarvelgirl

@thebiggerbear @roseblue373 @this-is-me19 @emily-winchester @riteofpassage77

@deans-spinster-witch @deans-baby-momma @sanscas @mxltifxnd0m @suckitands33

@kaleldobrev @spnwoman @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @pieandmonsters @trashmoutth

@globetrotter28 @adoringanakin @midnightmadwoman @chevroletdean @tayl0rfanatic

@chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @spnfamily-j2 @everything-is-all-clear

@deansbbyx @sarahgracej @chernayawidow @mimaria420 @stoneyggirl2

@fics-pics-andotherthings-i-like @waywardxwords @waynes-multiverse @twinkleinadiamondsky

@my-stories-vault @kayleighwinchester @rizlowwritessortof @cookiechipdough @sixxteenbullets

@tmb510 @syrma-sensei @artemys-ackles @malindacath @mrsjenniferwinchester

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

All In 15

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, power imbalance, low self esteem, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: you meet a mysterious man on a night out with your sister. (petite!reader)

based on the winning option for this poll

Characters: casino owner!Bucky Barnes

Note: Okay. Back again.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

You sit up as the faucet runs, the bathroom door slightly open. You look around, searching for your own shoes, not these annoying heels. As you get up, Bucky emerges, swiping his hands over his dark hair. You gulp and stop short. You gape at his shirtless torso. 

“You going somewhere, doll?” He asks. 

“Um, yeah, home,” you tear your eyes off of him. 

“Home? It’s late.” 

“I know but... my mom...” 

“I bet she’s asleep. She won’t know the difference, doll. I can’t let you go off into the night like that,” he insists as he comes closer. 

“But I...” you scour the room for your purse. You really don’t know how you’ll explain it all to your mom. You can’t go home in this dress and makeup. “I have to--” 

“Who say? You’re an adult, aren’t ya? You can stay.” He comes close and puts his hands on your shoulders, “you’re not gonna leave me all alone, are you?” 

“Bucky, I...” you chew your lip. “I had fun...” 

“But you can’t stay and snuggle. I get it. You’re a special girl, maybe I just don’t deserve ya,” he frowns. “And I’m not gonna make you stay but I can’t let you go off alone. So let me get dressed and I’ll drive you home.” 

You look at him. Your chest tweaks. He did all this for you. He’s already half undressed for the day and you can see the fatigue around his eyes. To be honest, you’re exhausted yourself. 

“No, I can’t-- I’ll stay,” you try to smile but you’re too nervous to do more than show your teeth. 

“You don’t gotta feel sorry for me,” he scoffs. 

“Sorry for you?” You pout, “no. How could I—what would I feel sorry for?” 

His throat bobs and he looks away, “you really are a sweet girl.” 

“Bucky,” you step closer, then stop yourself. You notice the muscles in his chest. He’s so strong and big. It’s distracting. “I’m just me. I... you—you own this whole place, why would I feel bad for you? It’s not... that. I’m just...” your lashes flick and your eyes drift down to his muscled stomach. You tear them away in shame, “nervous.” 

“Nervous,” he looks at you, almost bashfully as he keeps his chin tilted down. “About what?” 

“Well, er... everything. You. I... I’m just... it’s all so new, that’s all.” You twist your hand around your finger. “I didn’t mean to... hurt you.” 

He stares at you and takes a deep breath. He stands up straight and comes closer. “Aw, doll, no. Don’t give me that face. It makes me want you even more. To show you that you don’t need to be nervous. I wanna take care of ya. That’s the deal, isn’t it? I’m gonna give you everything you could ever dream of and all I’m asking is for you to keep being sweet to me.” 

He brings a hand up to cup your chin and you shiver. His thumb rubs along the line of your jaw as you peer up at him, “come on.” 

He gently urges you toward the bed. You put your hand on his wrist and stop him. You run your touch down his forearm. 

“I can’t sleep in this,” you look down at the dress. “Too tight.” 

“Ah, you want one of mine, doll?” He chuckles and reluctantly pulls his hand away. 

He turns and strides to the closet. To your surprise, there are clothes inside. Some of them you recognise from the racks of dresses you browsed earlier. He reaches inside and takes out a black button up. He comes back to you as he slips it off the hanger. 

He hands it over and you thank him. You feel the fabric, it’s soft. It’ll be nicer than the pinch of the seams. 

“Can I unzip ya?” He rasps. You sense the tension in his voice, as if he can barely get it out. 

“Oh, sure.” 

You turn your back to him, as much to hide your own burning blush as to hide from the heat roiling from him. You wince as his thumb brushes your skin and he slowly pulls down the tab of the zipper. You quiver out your breath and clutch the bodice of the dress as it slackens. You look at him from the corner of your eye. 

His fingertips trail up your spine and he steps closer. You brace yourself. He sniffs and pulls his hand away. 

“I’ll close my eyes,” he puts his hand over his face and turns on his heel. 

You don’t move right away. His presence is like a noose. You step away from him and put the shirt on the bed. You shimmy out of the dress and swipe it quickly off the floor. You put the shirt on and button it up. You unhook your bra and slide it off one arm at a time before pulling it through it free from beneath the fabric. 

You gather up the shirt and bra and clear your throat, “you can look now.” 

He accepts your invitation eagerly. He looks at you. Nowhere else but you. As you carry the clothing to rest on the dresser, he hums. Your legs tingle as they’re exposed to the room and him. They were before but now you feel even barer. 

As he approaches, you wrench back and face him. He stops to step out of his pants and you watch him in disbelief. He has only his dark briefs left. The twitch under the fabric gives you a start. You squeak and hurry for the bed. That’s not because of you... no, but... 

He follows. You climb up just ahead of him and his weight dips beside you. You push your legs under the covers as he reaches back to flip the light switch beside the headboard. The lamp goes out and he groans as he jostles closer. 

You lay down and just as quickly you’re locked in his embrace. His warm breath fans over your cheek as he nestles in close and brushes his nose along your cheek. His hand traces up and down your side and he clutches your hip. He pulls you flush to him. You can fill him—it—moving against your thigh. 

“Doll, ain’t this nice? Just us, just snuggling,” he purrs and tucks his hand under you, hooking a leg around yours. “I wish it could last forever.” You hum, unsure what to say. He kisses your cheek and hushes your silence, “sweet dreams. Don’t think I could sleep any better than next to you.” 

🃏

Sleep shrouds you in a shallow void. You can sense everything around you. Your mind won’t let go of your strange surroundings or the man next to you. Before you open your eyes, you try to convince yourself it was all a dream. 

You open your eyes to find the truth vivid before you. Bucky entwines himself in your as he snores into your hair. His arm is hooked around you and you’re not sure you’re okay about his hand being where it is. As you squirm, he kneads your ass. 

You reach back to stop him and he growls. The sound makes your chest twinge and you arch your back as his fingers curl deeper into your soft flesh. You cling to him as he holds you close. 

“Mmm,” he drones groggily, “you’re so warm, baby.” 

He rocks his pelvis and you feel just what you did the night before. He’s hard. The realization freezes you. You gulp and put your other hand over his thigh, squeezing him through the blankets. 

“Bucky,” you squeak, “Bucky?” 

“So good,” he continues to tilt his hips in a lewd rhythm. 

You turn to look at him, pulling back to see him. You’re caught in his hold. His eyes are closed as he lays beside you. Is he asleep? 

He continues to roll into you. You don’t know what to do. You’re embarrassed and helpless. He keeps on as you babble and blink up at the hotel ceiling. He grunts and jerks, shakes, then stops altogether. You shudder. 

“Bucky,” you say louder as you writhe in his arm. 

“Mm, ugh, huh,” he mutters as you tap his shoulder frantically. “Doll, what’s--” 

You look down as you feel something wet seep through the shirt. He releases you as he leans back and lifts the blanket. He peeks down and quickly sits up. Before you can say a word, he swings his legs over the edge and stands. He storms into the bathroom and the door snaps behind him. 

You gape after him. When at last you can move, you drag the blanket away from the mattress. You look at the wet spot on your shirt and push yourself up. You’re not sure but you are sure. It can’t be anything else. You’ve heard of it happening to men in their sleep but you always thought it only happened to teens. 

The door opens and you pop your head up. Bucky comes out with a towel around his waist and his hand on his forehead, “doll. I’m so sorry. I was dreaming and...of you, of course, but I got carried away. I didn’t mean to—I didn’t realise...” he swallows and closes his eyes. He tilts his head and drops his arm, “I’m so embarrassed.” 

“Uh, oh, I... I... well, I guess it happens, right?” You can’t look at him.  

“Well, not really. I gotta be honest, I mean, after this, there’s no point lying but... this doesn’t happen to me. Not often. Not since... well, it was a while ago,” he explains. “I guess you just do that to me.” 

“Erm, oh, I... I’m sorry?” You say. 

“Sorry, doll,” he chuckles and nears the bed. “Baby,” his voice grits in his throat, “do you know the last time a woman made me feel anything? At all? You got me feeling all sort of ways,” he exhales with a quake and reaches for you. 

You look at him as he latches onto your arm. He pulls you to the edge of the bed, “come here.” 

“Bucky--” 

He forces you to your feet and wraps you up in a hug, “I mean it, doll, I’m crazy for ya. And I’m tryna be patient but... you can see, I’m struggling. Huh? Can I have a little? Please.” 

You bat your lashes and dare to look up at him. His blue eyes are blazing and his cheeks are slightly tinged pink. Your stomach is flip flopping. 

“I...” you push your lips together and swallow, “what... what exactly... um, what did you want?” 

He trembles as he brings his hand up your arm and over your shoulder. He cradles your head and lets out another purr, “can I taste it? Please?” 

“Taste?” You echo thinly. 

“Baby, you don’t gotta do nothing. Just lay back, right? It’s like kissing. Mhmm. I’ll just be doing it...” his eyes drift lower and his nose furrows as if he’s snarling, “down there.” 

“I... I never...” 

“Promise, I’ll be nice. I just wanna try it. Alright? You say stop, I’ll stop, but baby,” his nails graze your scalp, “I’m getting hard again. It hurts.” 

You stare up at him, speechless. What do you say? What can you say? You’re in this hotel with him. The reason you’re there and could just as easily be the reason you’re not. And he’s you’re only way home. 

All of this, the room, the casino, last night, it’s all because of him. He gives and gives and you don’t see how you can keep taking. You squeeze your thighs together as they tingle. 

“Okay,” you whisper. 

“Okay?” He twitches. 

You nod as your eyes flit back and forth, “er, what... what do I do?” 

He exhales and puts his hands on your shoulders as he parts. He guides you back to the bed until your thighs meet the side, “you just sit, doll.” He shoves you down until you’re on the mattress, “I’ll do the rest.” 

You keep your eyes straight. Your body’s all locked up. You can’t move. He gets on his knees and moves toward you. He reaches under the shirt and grabs onto your panties. He tugs. 

“Help me out, baby,” he growls. 

You lift yourself slightly, just until he gets them past your bottom. You fall back down heavily. You’re buzzing in disbelief. He rolls your panties down your legs and off your ankles. He flings them away. 

He pulls your knees apart and you squeak as cool air grazes along your exposed cunt. He bends forward and kisses your thigh. You squeal. 

“Baby, I promise, I’ll be nice,” he speaks against your skin, his warm sweat smearing up your leg, “just be good. Be good for me, baby.” 

He shoves his head under the shirt and you exclaim as his tongue swipes up your cunt. You slap your hand against his head and thrash. He reaches back to hold your hand against his hair and buries his face into you. He hums and flicks his tongue. It sends a thrill through you. 

Your toes curl and your muscles strain. He keeps his tongue moving, and you push your head back as you lean your pelvis into him. Oh, wow.  

[rafeshow]

Part 2 of just for clicks 🥺😩🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼 please

just for clicks .. pt. 2

hasanabi x fem!streamer!reader

tags : probably extremely out of character hasan (it’s been a minute since i’ve watched a stream pls let me live), use of y/n, angst, comfort, tension?, english isnt my first language, probably lots of inconsistency’s and errors.. lmk if i missed any tags !

a/n : heyyy ppl.. sososososo sorry for how long this has taken !! i’ve been very busy in my personal life and i’ve had extreme writers block, and no motivation to write for men tbh LMAOO. if you have any requests for fem streamer fanfics send them my way ig 😭. all that to say, again; im so terribly sorry for the delay with this fic. sorry if it’s awful, i’ve been writing it on and off for MONTHSSS. read part one here.

You awoke around 3AM to a gentle knock at your apartment door. The current ‘situation’ Hasan had sprung the two of you into only mere hours ago had easily kept you up; having only been asleep for about 10 minutes at this point. It was like clockwork watching it play out; first the clips, then the comments against Hasan, followed by the people running to his defense, and of course the few content creators (who probably didnt meet him more than once) insisting they ‘always knew something was off about him’. It had been hours since it blew up, and other than responding to the few initial texts from your friends informing you of the situation, you had gone completely radio silent.

The saddest part was you werent even upset. Rather the opposite, your brain jumped through hoops trying to rationalize it. He just said it in the heat of the moment, he didnt mean it the way it came off, he was just defending himself, he just wanted to make his feelings clear. But of course, the rationalizing thoughts can only do so much to block out the harmful ones; you just really over-thought the way the two of you acted, it was never like that, you made it weird, its your fault.

But honestly, what else could you do? Sitting and ‘rotting’ (for lack of a better word) in bed was much more appealing than the other options. Yes you could hop online and defend yourself, be mad about it, say how gross it was for him to insinuate you'd do anything for views, talk about how weird it is for him to get that pressed over a fan video. Or, you could always flee and take the sad victim side, let all your friends do the talking for you, leave little comments like ‘i didnt know he thought of me that way’ and profusely apologize. But none of that would be you being honest. Of course you wanted to defend yourself, of course you were sad and beating yourself up about it, but you wanted nothing more than to just sit and wallow in it for a while. Avoid the inevitable for as long as possible.

Your friends had all been bombarding you with messages and calls, but your phone was long past muted and set aside. Before going awol you left most of them with a brief ‘im going to sleep it off’ message, but judging by the still persistent notifications, youd assume that didn't ease their minds at all.

Youd been aimlessly watching a show for a few hours at this point, lulling in and out of sleep and tuning out the sound of your phone for the most part. The sudden knock at your door was a change in pace though, the sound snapping you out of the static and fog buzzing around in your head. No, the idea of one of your friends driving over to check on you wasn't all that out of the question. You lived just outside of L.A, far enough from most of your friends to feel like a nuisance asking anybody to drive to come visit you, but not far enough where you couldn't justify driving there yourself. You sat up, adjusting your loose sweatpants where they hung low on your hips. After a bit of quick process of elimination, you figured it was QT; one of your closer (and most considerate) friends. Because of this, you opted not to throw a shirt on to cover yourself, clad in a just a comfortable sports bra.

You shuffled your way over to the door, throwing on the best smile you could manage before twisting the knob and opening it. You were surprised when you had to adjust your eyes upwards, the figure at your door towering over where QT would normally reside. As you took him in, it didnt take long for an exhausted sigh to leave you. It was Hasan. There he stood, still sporting his typical tall and broodingly aloof aesthetic, even despite being moderately hunched over and with concern etched in every inch of his stature. You couldnt help but notice how unsure he looked. Anxious. No, Hasan wasnt always the most outgoing and ‘go-lucky’ guy, but he looked almost pained as you met his eyes; his clothes twisted in ways that made you guess hed been fidgeting with them, his nail polish chipped away on most fingers, the way he took an almost comically large step back as soon as you opened the door.

“Can we talk?” He said, his voice a harsh change in the silence you didnt realize was resting between the two of you. “You can say no of course-” He rushed out, only his fingers flaring out in emphasis opposed to his usual hand movements, almost as if he was afraid hed startle you.

“Yea, sure.” You sighed out, hardly even mentally present in the moment. You rubbed at your eyes as you held the door open, leaving plenty of space for him to walk in. He took you up on the invitation, albeit looking incredibly unsure whilst doing so.

He padded into your apartment painfully slow before quickly snapping his eyes to you, almost as if waiting for permission to do something. For you to give him instruction. You didn't even look at him though, instead grumbling your way over to your previous home on the sofa, tugging your blanket to one end and leaving plenty of room for him on the other. He waited till you’d sat down to follow, trying his best to gently take a seat at his appointed spot on the couch.

“How’d you get my address?” You said plainly, opting to just stare into the tv as it lowly played some random show. He’d never been there before. You honestly didnt care, whatever his answer was. You just hoped it would spring him into getting the daunting conversation over with.

“Austin.” He breathed out, sounding even tenser than he looked. “He gave it to me so I could send you something for the podcast a while ago.” He pausued, but continued; “Im sorry, I know how fucking weird it is for me to just show up but I couldnt just sit there and-” He took a breath, and you could practically taste the oncoming ramble. “You wouldnt answer anybody, and you totally have the right to do that obviously but I couldnt just sit with myself not knowing what was going on.. I started driving here before I even thought it through, which is totally my bad.. but I couldn’t just go all the way back without even checking in.. -And I know my feelings are irrelevant in this and its about you I just-”

“Hasan stop.” You turned to him, trying and failing not to look as sympathetic as you did. “I dont-.. it’s fine, okay? I mean obviously it’s not fine, but we’ll get over it. Im sure you didn't mean what you said, or at least not like that- you know- it's whatever, okay?” You practically hushed the words out, opting for the soothing approach and acting way more casual about the situation than you felt. You threw in a horribly farse reassuring smile at the end, hoping to solidify your words.

“You really didnt need to come all this way, I wouldve answered in the morning. I was just sleeping.” You added, and you saw the way his face ticked. He knew you were lying, but he was definitely not going to pry, whether about the lack of sleep or your want to brush things off. He persisted for himself though;

“It’s not fine, y/n. Im not shoving this shit under the rug, it’s going to eat me alive.” He said, his voice switching between frustration, desperation, and forced softness. You could see the way he struggled with his words, trying so hard not to talk about the way he feels (and failing miserably at it). The way a ping of regret would flash over him after every word he spoke. His eyes flickered back and forth from boring into you and staring off into the abyss of meddled emotions he’d created for himself.

“I’ll just lay it out how it is, okay? It was beyond messed up for me to insinuate you’d maliciously do something.. Like that stuff, for views, okay? Especially when I was doing that.. shit to you too. I shouldve never said that, or even thought it for that matter. I was just- frustrated, okay? Thats not me justifying it or anything, I just wanted you to like, know that-”

“Hasan.” You cut him off, this time sitting up and reaching to put a hand on his knee. You swear you could feel his leg flex under your touch. You stopped for a moment, searching his face for answers to questions you couldn't compute.

“What is so frustrating?” Is the question you somehow managed to compose. You don’t know the answer you wanted. It was an open ended question, he could take the side that you secretly hoped he would; that it was the fans. The overwhelming shipping and attention your relationship got from the fans was suffocating to him, and that he didn’t feel the way they portrayed him to feel about you. Or he could take the side that scared you. That he felt exactly the way everyone was portraying it, and them rubbing his own feelings in his face before he even had a chance to do anything about them himself was driving him crazy. Instead, the two of you sat in silence, and it wasnt uncomfortable. The air almost felt thick around the two of you, a comfortable fog, but something in it possessed you to add a gentle squeeze to his leg with emphasis. And you definitely felt him twitch this time.

“Tell me i'm not the only one who's feeling this way.” He finally muttered, and suddenly the feeling of his gaze hit you like a ton of bricks. You almost wanted to cower away with the way his eyes bored into yours, almost needy, the look feeling even more pleading than the words he'd said.

You knew what you wanted to say, but how could you possibly admit to it? Through this whole situation, you’d been not only so terribly irked at him, but also so frustrated with yourself. How could you admit that you too had been feeling the same way, and you hadn’t done anything about it either? You’d be admitting that the ripples throughout the fandom and now the controversy had been from your actions (or lack there of) too. You’d already been beating yourself up about it all day. What answer did he truly want? If you admitted to him that you too felt the same way, would he be greatful or mad? If you lied and said you didn’t feel the same way, what good or bad would it do? It could wreck him, he’d beat himself up beyond belief, the fact that he not only projected his unreciprocated feelings onto you but also gotten mad over it live. All of it being his fault. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself. But you didn’t know which was worse, seeing him mad at you, or seeing him sad. You could only hope for the best, before the words spilled out of your mouth;

“Hasan of course I feel the same way.” A frown etched into your face, and you continued before he even had a chance to react; “I’m so so sorry I hadn’t done anything about it sooner either, I just beat myself up about it until I couldn’t-“ you withdrew your hand from his knee, shaking your hands, looking for the words you couldn’t form yourself. “ -I couldn’t tell how I was even feeling about it anymore..? I used to be so upset that you hadn’t done anything, I thought you were toying with me. I mean.. I tried making it obvious that I liked you so that you’d do something if you felt the same way but you never did so I convinced myself that you didn’t-“

“Hey, Hey,” He cut me off, and it was only then that i’d realized how close he’d moved to me during my rant. His leg rubbed against mine where I sat criss cross in the corner of the couch. His frame leaned over mine as he gave his best attempt at shrinking down to aid me. His eyes scattered across my face as his large hand cupped my cheek, hurriedly wiping at tears that I didn’t even notice were falling. It was only then that I finally realized the sound of my hurried breaths, the air practically huffing out of me. He looked frantic, broken, even though that’s exactly what I didn’t want. He pulled me close to his chest, i’m sure not only to sooth me, but also because he couldn’t bare to look at my tear stricken face anymore. I gripped onto his shirt, not even knowing I needed to cry this bad.

He didn’t say anything at first. I felt him pressing kisses into the crown of my head, and I couldn’t tell which one of us needed them more. He held me tight and close, all of his previous worries of hurting me more and being gentle replaced by the need to comfort. It was unspoken how much we’d both wanted to hold each other over the last few months, whether like this or otherwise, and after all our emotions boiling over, I think this was exactly what we needed.

We sat there in the silence for a long time. The humming of the tv still echoing through my flat, and the now present thumping of Hasans heartbeat against my ear was beyond peaceful. Of course, we’d pull ourselves together soon and have a realistic conversation, but for now, this was perfect.

[aventurineswife]

Gepard, Diluc, Kaeya and Sampo meeting their future child(ren)

The future child(ren) time travelled to the past to see what the characters and reader look like in the past or the future child(ren) messing with some device and it sends them tumbling to the past where reader and the characters were still not together

The Past Meets Future

Tags: Gepard Landau, Sampo Koski, Diluc Ragnvider, Kaeya Alberich, Time Travel, Future Children, Parent-Child Relationships, Alternate Realities, Family, Humor, Heartwarming, Surreal Situations.

Warnings: Mild Language, Minor Time-Travel Paradoxes (Not extensively explored), Light-hearted Mischief.

[Continuation]

It was a quiet morning in Belobog when Gepard felt the strange hum of energy near his quarters. He was in the midst of preparing for his duties as Captain of the Silvermane Guards, but something told him that today would be anything but ordinary.

The air shimmered briefly, and before him stood a young child—no older than twelve—dressed in unfamiliar clothing. The child had a strange aura about them, their presence both comforting and bewildering. The child’s hair resembled his own, and the eyes, though softer, were unmistakably his. They even stood with a quiet dignity, much like him, though they wore a curious look on their face as they took in the surroundings.

"Captain Landau," the child spoke, their voice clear yet tinged with a familiarity that sent a shiver down his spine. "It’s so nice to finally meet you."

Gepard’s brow furrowed. "And who might you be, child?" he asked, his hand instinctively resting on the hilt of his sword. Despite his confusion, his protective instincts kicked in.

"I’m... your child," the young one replied, somewhat sheepishly. "From the future. I... uh, sort of messed with a device and ended up here."

Gepard's eyes widened in surprise, and for a moment, the world seemed to freeze around him. His child? From the future? A million questions flooded his mind, but the most pressing was, "How did you get here?"

The child smiled sheepishly, holding up a small, glowing device. "I wasn’t trying to time travel, honest! But the device malfunctioned, and... here I am. I just wanted to see what you were like back then."

Despite the whirlwind of emotions crashing through him—astonishment, worry, and something else he couldn't quite place—Gepard knelt down to the child's level. "Then... you’re safe. That’s all that matters. I won’t let anything happen to you."

The child smiled warmly, and Gepard’s heart clenched. He didn't know what the future held, but with this child in front of him, the weight of his duty to protect the people of Belobog felt more personal than ever.

[Header credits]

Diluc stood at the balcony of his manor, gazing at the sky. It had been a peaceful evening, and yet, something about the air felt charged with an unfamiliar energy. His thoughts were momentarily interrupted by a soft voice calling from the doorway.

"Daddy?"

Diluc turned sharply, his heart racing. Standing before him was a young child, their hair practically glowing in the fading light, a small figure dressed in an outfit that looked both futuristic and out of place. Their eyes, a perfect blend of his own, looked up at him with confusion and a little bit of awe.

"Who are you?" Diluc asked, his voice soft but firm, wary of the sudden intrusion.

The child hesitated for a moment before grinning, their expression full of mischievous confidence. "I’m your kid! Well, I’m from the future, but I wanted to see you back when you were younger. So... I accidentally used a time-traveling device and, uh, here I am."

Diluc’s heart skipped a beat. His child? From the future? He stared at the child, momentarily lost for words. His gaze softened as he looked at the redhead who had inherited his fiery hair and, undoubtedly, a fierce spirit.

"You’re... my child?" Diluc muttered, his hand resting on the balcony railing, as if steadying himself. "How is this possible?"

The child’s grin widened. "I’m not sure how I got here, but I guess this is your present! Cool, huh?"

Diluc chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief. Despite the strange situation, he couldn’t help but feel a flicker of warmth in his chest. "You’re quite the troublemaker, aren’t you?" he said, his voice filled with affection.

The child laughed, and Diluc’s stoic demeanor melted for a moment, replaced by something akin to hope. Maybe the future wasn’t as uncertain as he thought, if this was what awaited him—someone to carry on his legacy, someone to share his heart.

[Header credits]

Kaeya was lounging in his office, his feet propped up on his desk as he sipped his drink, savoring the silence. That was until the air around him began to shimmer and warp, and suddenly, a small figure appeared at the doorway.

Kaeya’s gaze locked onto the child standing there, their his, and their eyes—bright and familiar—locked with his. The child was grinning mischievously, their posture radiating the same confidence that Kaeya himself carried.

"Well, well, who do we have here?" Kaeya raised an eyebrow, leaning back in his chair with a smirk. "You seem familiar, little one."

"I’m your kid from the future," the child replied cheerfully, practically bouncing with excitement. "I wanted to meet you, and—well—I may have messed up a little with a time-traveling device. Whoops!"

Kaeya leaned forward, his smirk turning into a full-blown grin. "From the future, huh? Interesting. So, what brings you to the past?"

The child put their hands on their hips, looking proud. "I just wanted to see you back when you were younger. And maybe cause a little trouble along the way."

Kaeya chuckled, the sound rich with amusement. "Of course, I’m raising a troublemaker. Seems like you’ve inherited more than just my looks, haven’t you?"

The child nodded enthusiastically. "Definitely! Got all your charm, too."

Kaeya’s heart warmed at the sight of the child—his child—standing before him. He wasn’t sure what the future held, but seeing this little version of himself made him believe that maybe, just maybe, it could be a future worth fighting for.

Sampo was busy in his workshop, his hands deftly working on a new "project" when he felt a sudden shift in the air. He looked up to find a small figure standing before him, their appearance completely out of place. Their eyes and mischievous grin were all too familiar.

"Well, well," Sampo said, raising an eyebrow. "Who’s this little troublemaker?"

The child, no older than twelve, grinned. "I’m your kid from the future! I wanted to meet you, and I might’ve messed up with a time-traveling device... but I’m here now!"

Sampo laughed, his usual charm never faltering. "Oh, is that so? A little time traveler, huh? You’ve got guts to show up like this."

"Yeah! I figured if anyone could handle a little mischief, it’d be you," the child replied, eyes sparkling. "So, what’s it like in the present or the past? I bet it’s all sorts of exciting!"

Sampo’s heart skipped a beat. His child. From the future. The idea was surreal, but there was something undeniably precious about this small version of himself standing before him.

"Well, the present is never boring," he said, grinning. "But I’m sure you’ve got a lot to learn before you can keep up with me."

The child grinned back, full of mischief and curiosity, and Sampo couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride. Despite all his faults, maybe this little one was proof that, somewhere down the line, he’d found something truly worth protecting.

[twig-tea]

GL Odds and Ends January 2025

I'm still trying to figure out what 2025 means for me in terms of where and how I spend my time, but one thing I am passionate about is making sure there is a record of GL media, so I'm going to try to prioritize keeping this up to at minimum monthly, though I might change up the format. Last one was end of December 2024. If you're interested in GL older than that, check out my GL rec list and my #gl recs tag for the other odds and ends posts. Series new to the roundup are marked with an asterisk*.

Currently airing (with thoughts up to 31 Jan):

Petrichor ep 9/10 (Thai, Saturdays, 10:00 AM ET, iQIYI) I've appreciated the struggle that Tul has gone through in terms of wanting to use her police powers to protect her family though that goes against her morals, and some of the procedural aspects I was grumbling about before have been explained by the plot. However, it still bothers me that she's not a very good detective. That being said, Engfa and Charlotte still have fantastic chemistry, and Na is having what seems like the time of his life.

*Us the series ep 2/12 (Thai, Saturdays, 8:00 AM ET, YouTube) I admit I think I have Chao Planoy fatigue. Age gap, both characters are lying to each other, there are abusive family members, and a guy who seems nice but I'm braced for a reveal about how he's actually awful. I'm feeling like I'm playing bingo. Honestly If someone gets hit by a car I might lose it. All my baggage aside, the pacing on this feels uneven and it doesn't feel like it has its feet yet.

*Call Me By No Name ep 4/8 (Japanese, Thursdays, 12:30 PM ET, GagaOOLala) Honestly I am not buying the romance between these two protagonists and I am finding them a little overwrought.

*Trunk Girl ep 1/? (Korean, possibly Thursdays, YouTube) This has just started, and the vibes are off. I am suspicious of the circumstances that led this runaway to stay with her friend, especially when she kissed her in her sleep (and I don't mean suspicious of sapphic feelings, those are already taken as given considering the genre).

*FirstLOVE ep 5/? (Korean, Mondays, YouTube) Toxic girlfriend gets replaced and then regrets letting her lover go. We'll see how this ends but this is another messy drama that feels pretty rough.

*I Am Devil ep 5/? (Thai, Saturdays, YouTube) Gonna be honest with y'all I watched ep1 and shelved the rest, it's a pulp in the style of high drama like Sastra and JPC below produce and just isn't my jam. If you're looking for high heat lakorn-style drama, give this a try.

[Note: Mate is still airing if you did not fast track, but since I did I've included it in the following section]

Recently Completed:

The Fragrance You inherit 8eps 25mins each (Japanese, 8 Nov 24-27 Dec 24, no official distribution but fansub on @isaksbestpillow's blog[thank you Siiri!] I loved this finale and wrote about it here. For those who don't want to click the link, in short this is not a romance but a really beautiful and sweet show about all kinds of interpersonal relationships.

Pluto 12eps 45 mins each (Thai, 19 Oct 24-04 Jan 25, YouTube) This series showcased the skills and chemistry of Namtan and Film, and had some of the most iconic product placement in a GL to date. The plot was messy but held together, and as much as I was unimpressed with their choices week to week, their choices made sense within the narrative (and genre) being told. I knew this one wasn't for me, but what it was doing, it did pretty well, and beautifully. The one real ding from me was the use of blindness as a metaphor that essentially got handwaved away; that and I think it was doing too much. But I am glad that before that, there was some great use of their platform to highlight the importance of universal design.

INTP 4eps 5 mins each (Korean, 27 Dec 24-22 Jan 25 YouTube) This is the latest short series from RedQ, who produced some of my favourite GL short series including More than or equal to 75 degrees C, and To the Ex who Hated Me. I said when this started that the setup of this one reminded me of Semantic Error if SangWoo realized he was attracted to JaeYoung at their first group assignment meeting, and I think that holds. These two fell for each other because they both care about the group project, and both protect each other. It's a bit short but I found it very sweet.

Mate, 12eps 50+ mins each (Thai, 26 Nov 24-28 Jan 25 fast-track or 4 Feb 25, WeTV (uncut version)) In the end this show remained a struggle for me. There were things it was doing that I really liked (the characters tried hard not to resort to noble idiocy, and when characters did resort to noble idiocy they were confronted with the consequences, for example), and things that I really did not, and there were parts that were really hard to watch and will haunt me. There are a lot of things I like about this show, so I don't want to discourage views. Just go into this one informed, and make the decision that's right for you.

*Adrenaline 4eps 15 mins each (Thai, 10 Jan-31 Jan 25, YouTube) This show is a cross between a travel ad and a lakorn. This is a major spoiler, but the main character has a secret condition where she forgets things that causes her to forget her first time with her girlfriend!? This show is so messy lol

Recent One-offs, Side Couples, etc.:

Fireworks of Yesteryear/When We Met has been made available on YouTube. A 35-minute Chinese GL that includes a makeout and as a result the production team have been working hard to get it in front of eyeballs. This is a moody piece with an open ending; there's an age gap too so YMMV (30s and 22).

GL microseries Your Name Engraved Herein (not to be confused with the BL feature film) has been subtitled by @douqi7s. Watch the original on Bilibili and enjoy the subs on YouTube. This one is also melancholy but it's some really tight storytelling in under 2 mins and manages to feel hopeful even though it's sad.

There is a lesbian side couple in Flirt Milk the series (airing now on iQIYI). This couple Noon and Praewa previously appeared as sides in Love Senior.

There is a new MV featuring a lesbian couple for the artist KnomJean on YouTube. This is one of those MVs that tells a story (TW for family violence) and after getting through the sad backstory, celebrates marriage equality in Thailand.

IdolFactory is re-running GAP the series on YouTube. If you've been putting off watching, now is a good time!

Speaking of re-runs, Yes Or No and the two sequel/spinoffs (Yes or No 2, and Yes or No 2.5) are all newly on GagaOOLala for streaming in some regions (I know for sure they're in North America, not sure about others)

Uranus2324 is starting to show up in particular places on the internet. I watched it and after all of the negative things I'd heard I actually liked it lol I'll see if I can write about it more this week

My suspected wlw sides in See Your Love ended up being implied only I was a little sad about this but at least I wasn't imagining the vibes.

Mom Ped Sawan is still airing but I still don't have a source for subs

Sastra film app YouTube channel has several short Cambodian GL series that come out weekly Honestly they are not to my taste but I don't like gatekeeping GL especially from smaller markets. I check in on these time to time and if there are any that I think are great I'll give them a shout-out

Ditto above with JPC media YouTube channel for Thai GL shorts if there are any that stand out to me I'll say so; that being said I haven't had time recently so if I've missed anything good let me know!

Starting soon:

Reverse With Me (sequel spinoff to Reverse 4 U), Thai, 5 Feb, iQIYI and Ch3+ app

Fragrance of the First Flower s2, Taiwanese, 18 February 2025, GagaOOLala ok this isn't that soon but I'm just so excited we're getting this second season after all!

As always, if I'm missing anything, please let me know!

[vivi-blue]

IT IS FINALLY DONE!

God, this took me way too long...xD

After days of work I finally finished the challenge that I set for myself: Sending out props to a lot of artist here on tumblr that I really enjoy! (Actually there are way waaay more people, but I really had to set myself a limit, I'm sorry fellas ;w; I still love you!)

These people inspire me every day with their creative concepts, stories, humor and passion for art and give me the drive to continue drawing myself. With this little collection I wanted to say "thank you" for all that you do and create. You rock, guys!

(I really hope I didn't mess up any of the tags and I apologize if I might fu**ed up your designs/characters ;3; I know I'm not the best in proportions and all, but I really tried. <w<´´ Also I really hope Tumblr compresses the text by itself, so that you don't get smacked by this wall of text. I'm still a rookie on tumblr, so I don't know what to do ;w;)

Okay, heeere we go! THE TAGS!

@tv-tower / @uuberwachen - with PB aka Swap Pizzahead (I really love the idea of the au and adore the character designs. PB sure is one of my favorites -w- He is literally the most reasonable of them all XD)

@technically-a-kiwi - with Cosmic Peppino ( The design of Cosmic Peppino is simply beautiful and the idea that this chef has strong star powers and needs to take care of Cosmic Noises shenanigans is super funny to me XD )

@sirtotallynotatimetraveler - with Mel Sproutbloom / Sagebloom (I'm sorry, I wasn't sure which name is canon ;w;) ( I loooove Mel! He is such a gentle, colorful guy and looking at him makes me all happy <3 )

@alextydaisuda123 - with their version of Vigilante ( I can't repeat enough how much I adore their artstyle. I love Vigi's design the most. I don't know it's just...THAT'S Vigi for me, you know? Simply fitting, cool, but also stylish -w- )

@alice-the-demon - with Vittoria ( I was first thinking of drawing Archangel Peppino, since this guy is the softness itself, buuuut I have to admit that I love the lively and passionate personality of Vittoria. She is great -w- )

@misdreavusplush - with Eyelashes ( I can't help it. I saw that character and was in awe. How adorable can you be?? I was barely able to draw her eyes as pretty as they are xD <3 )

@creature-of-pizza - with Pepp ( Seriously, the idea to see a "Fake Peppino" with more cat dna is such a win for me. He is dynamic, sassy, derpy and so damn cool! >w< Also love how colorful their pictures are.)

@eskariolis-con-salsa - with Gnocchi (I was thinking about drawing their version of Fake Peppino first, but...*looks at picture* ...let's be honest, you can't get pass that little guy. ;w; He purifies my soul. Have some soap, little guy.)

@oddpizza - with Caramel Jam aka CJ (Such a creative and powerful character! I've seen so many artworks of them and I adore them. You need more joyful people like this ^^)

@pizza-tower-secrets - with Lycheecheechee ( A small, adorable bundle full of surprises and of course secrets! I love their drive and colorful design. Simply a delight! :3 )

@rhaytronik - with Red ( A dynamic and enjoyable character with their love for adventures! Not only a great character but also the Pizzasona of my best friend. Thanks to them I was brave enough to start a tumblr account myself. So thank you for being there for me <3 )

@cutechan555 - with Mage Gustavo (To be honest, I had a very hard time to pick a character here, since their account is full of stories and ideas. I chose mage Gustavo, since I love his design and story. I'm currently into "Delicious in Dungeon" and to imagine that he goes dungeon crawling with his bros to safe Peppino is such a cool idea XD)

@bigbeastcyruspt - with Trion (I have to be honest, at first I was very startled of Trion, since his design is very mighty and scary. I mean, it's his chase form after all. But the more I learned about him, the more I grew to like him. Very damn cool design! Also couldn't help to add dah baby ;w;)

@lunar-dal - with Pizza Cruise Peppino (Another au I simply adore! The design of the characters is colorful and bright, and to imagine Peppino as a singing gondolier brings me great joy. Also I'm a big fan of otter Brick ;w; )

@smalltimidbean - with Pea Pod, Sugar Snap Pea and Snow Pea (Believe me, I never before had such a hard time to pick ONE of so many wonderful Peppi clones! THAT was torture XD But in the end I guess I picked my favorite. Such a tired, but very cute one. Not to forget about the little ones <3 To draw a PT character with 4 fingers and 2 thumbs on one hand was quite a challenge lol )

@tinderboxofsillyideas - with Coffee Peppino (Probably one of the most adorable au versions of Peppino. Seriously, if I had the chance to get my coffee in his café, I totally would! Give that guy all the tips! <3 First thought of drawing their wizard Peppino version, but the adorable barista won lol)

@xbeih - with Metal Peppino (One of the first au's I started following. Seriously, how cool can one person be?? I mean, the whole au is amazing and I enjoy every person in it. But damn...Peppino takes the cake. ówo He is so badass, you can't imagine <w< Also I'm very sorry, it was my first time drawing a guitar and aaaaaaa )

.....*looks left and right* ...ok, we did it. Wow!

God, I'm exhausted now...XD

Well, thank you very much for reading and sorry for the wall of text ówq I can only recommend you to check these people out. They are all very talented and should be appreciated!

Have a pleasant morning / day / evening / night everyone. (Depending your timezone lul .w. )

See ya next time! Vivi out!~

[forbebeandjam]

THE DINER | Bada Lee x Fem Reader | angst

Summary: you’d do anything for the girl you met at THE DINER

Word count: 2.1k

TRIGGER WARNING: this story contains sensitive topic such as murder, blood, jail, and psychologically issues.

READERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED

A/N: hi!! This is a short story inspired by the song “THE DINER” in Billie Eilish’s album HIT ME HARD AND SOFT. I was afraid that I might not be able to express the lyrics through this but I still hope you like it. I’m also not used to writing angst so… yeah. Have a good day or night!!🤍🙂‍↕️

You sat at a small diner in your hometown. All alone. It was almost two in the morning. You had a small cake with a candle in front of you. You, with psycho tendencies, celebrated your 25th birthday on your own. No kid ever wanted to befriend you and you ended up trying to make friends at some point.

So all you did was work from home. Your mother and father split up when you turned eighteen leaving you in that small home all by yourself. You learned that you could never lean on anyone for anything. All you could do was grow attached to fictional characters you watched after work.

You didn't go out much so no one really knew you. You didn't know anyone either. You never wanted to. What was the point either way?

They would end up walking away after a while, leaving you empty and lonely.

So you spent birthday after birthday in your bed, reading books and mangas that your online friend sent you. The only person you truly liked and trusted...

She forgot your birthday. How great! All alone again.

So maybe going out for your birthday wouldn't be such a bad idea.

You let out a deep sigh as you rested your chin on the palm of your hand. You twirled the lighter around your fingers, thinking that maybe setting the place on fire would bring some sort of warmth and comfort to your heart. Maybe even some satisfaction.

"Can I take your order?" You heard a sweet voice. As you looked up, your eyes met with her. The most beautiful girl you've ever met. You looked at the name tag and back at her eyes quickly.

"Um... no, I'm just here for a little bit. I'll blow the candles and vanish," you said and she gasped.

"It's your birthday? Oh my! Happy birthday!!" She said making your guts feel warm.

"Thank you, Miss Bada. But there is nothing happy about my birthday," you replied with a soft blush.

"Oh please. Call me Bada. Also, why not be happy? You're alive and healthy, right? Let's celebrate that!" She exclaimed. The diner was empty with only her and a cook in the kitchen.

"I am sitting here, alone, at two in the morning thinking about burning this place down. Don't you think that's kind of depressing? Crazy even?" You asked as you set the lighter in front of her.

She pulled out a cigarette out of her apron and placed it between her lips.

"You have me now, don't you? You're not alone," she picked up the lighter from the table and lit the cigarette. You started at her in awe. You couldn't believe how gorgeous she looked. How did someone so perfect live in this shitty town?

"Besides, let's be honest. If you burned this place down, you'd be doing me a huge favor," she said with a wink. That didn't. She had you. You were at your knees for her.

"Come on. Let's light your candles," she said as she lit the candles with your lighter. She sang you a soft birthday tune, and you blew the candles feeling the happiest you've been in twenty-five years.

That night, you ate food with her and chatted for hours. She told you she moved here to care for her parents and that she was pretty lonely herself, so you promised to come to the diner every night.

You did what you didn't want to. You let her into your life, hoping she didn't leave. It was just that, her perfect smile and the sweetness of her voice melted you. Her ey smile was now your weakness, and you couldn't think about anything else but Bada.

-

And so the days passed. You would be at the diner at midnight, and she would clock in to do her job. The place was often times empty so you two would have time to chat and laugh around.

However... you started to notice something odd about her. Her attitude was drastically changing. She looked tired and sad her clothes covered more of her body and she would sigh deeply when she was with you.

She wasn't laughing anymore, and you wanted to kill whatever was making her feel that way and make it suffer as well. 

One night, she didn't sit with you at all. She kept walking past as she served two tables. You wanted to call her name but she was just ignoring you. You had enough and grabbed her arm making her flinch and spill some hot coffee on your leg.

You hissed and she apologized as she bent down to clean your leg with a rag. The hot liquid left a red mark on your skin but you could only pay attention to Bada. 

"You shouldn't come here anymore. Please," she said and left without an explanation. 

"Wait!" you said but she disappeared into the kitchen. You saw the cook look at you from his window. He gave you a nasty look and a smirk before disappearing as well. At that moment something took over you. 

You stood up and fixed your skirt before walking to the kitchen where you found the cook holding Bada's arm tightly and he was about to hit her. You used your body to push him on the ground. 

You took one of the knives on the counter and stabbed his stomach with it. 

"No! OH MY GOSH!" Bada shouted. She pulled out her phone and called the cops. You looked at her in awe. 

"But... but I thought you loved me," you said and she covered her mouth. She ran out of the kitchen and you shrugged. You knew you'd do anything to protect her and she would come to her senses. 

You walked out of the kitchen where you saw people's horror faces when they saw you, covered in blood with bright smiles trying to look for Bada. 

She was in the bathroom trying to calm herself down when you walked in. 

"Y/N, you need to leave," she said as she grabbed paper towels and cleaned your hands and face with them. 

"But you, love me right? You need to marry me and kiss me on the head after an argument that you will most likely win. Please..." you said. 

You heard the sirens outside and Bada looked at you. 

"Stay here. Don't go anywhere," she said and you complied with her orders. You patiently waited for her to come back to you and take you far away but... 

The next thing you knew, you were being knocked to the ground and handcuffed. The people at the diner were cursing at you. Bada looked at you with apologetic eyes. She knew you were a lonely girl and you didn't mean any harm... at least not to her. 

You smiled at her and gave her a reassuring nod. 

-

As the days passed, you focused on seeing her again. You only got a restriction order after all since you did tell them it was self-defense and they believed you. Bada didn't speak or testify and what helped you was the lack of security cameras. 

You had never been charged with anything before either so you pretty much had a believable case. Still, you kept your profile on low to prevent alerting anyone but you needed to see Bada. 

The only thing that kept you alive was the memory of her beautiful eyes and smile while she talked to you. 

So you decided to go see her. when you arrived, you noticed there were security cameras all around. You sighed and slipped your hood on getting ready but stopped as you spotted Bada in a car. 

She was sitting next to someone. A man... 

Your guts twisted as you saw her smiling and giggling away and then it broke you. They kissed on the lips. Your blood left your body and you felt a cool shiver down your spine. 

"No... that can't be. She loves me. She can only love me," you bit the inside of your cheek letting the metal-tasting liquid fill your mouth. You didn't bother going to her. 

You went back home and tried to brush it off. You tried to make up lame excuses for her but they all led to the same conclusion- Bada didn't love you anymore.

So you knew what you needed to do. 

A normal person would simply cry and get over it but Bada was the love of your life. You had to protect her from anyone who tried to take her precious love away from you. You didn't sleep the entire night thinking about it...

-

The following night, you went to the diner again. You waited and saw the car pull up again. Bada was in there with the same man and you got angry. 

You waited till Bada went inside to approach the car. 

"Woah... who are you?" the man asked with a confused expression.

"Your worst nightmare," you replied before killing him. It was a quick death and you didn't care if anyone was watching. You took him to the woods behind the diner and dropped his body somewhere dark. 

You cleaned your hands and went inside the diner to find Bada. She looked at you with concern and dragged you to the kitchen where there was no one. 

"What are you doing here? You're going to get caught," she said. 

"Do you love him?" you asked. She pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. 

"Y/N, you shouldn't be here. Please go home," she said. 

"Bada... Do you love him?" you asked again firmly. She passed around the room. 

"No. I don't but he is my fiance and there is nothing I can do about it," she replied. 

"Do you love me?" you asked. Tears filled her eyes. 

"I can't be in love with a girl. It's not right. You should leave before he comes back," 

"Kiss me. If you love me kiss me and I promise I will make everything right," you stepped closer to her and could see her Adam's apple move up and down. 

And she did. She kissed you like there was no tomorrow and it was all well again. Every single one of your worries died down and you knew at that moment that Bada loved you. 

You could feel a tear roll down your cheek and when you opened your eyes she was crying as well. You wiped her tears and smiled. 

"I love you so much, Bada. You have no idea how much I love you," you said. 

"Let's run away, hm? Let's go far away where we can live together and no one will come between us," you said she nodded. 

She told you to go home and get ready. She would pick you up and you would go somewhere else and you agreed. You would agree to anything she told you to do and you went straight home to get your things ready. 

But Bada knew. She knew when you walked in by that small stain of blood on your cardigan that you had done something to her fiance. 

She knew by the way your eyes looked at her that you had committed a crime because of her and it broke her heart. She did love you. She loved you more than anything but she knew you were a dangerous person. She knew that all of your thoughts would soon turn against her and you would end up more hurt than you already were. 

So she picked up the phone and called the police. She gave them your location in detail and when she hung up the phone, she slid down the wall crying loudly. The pain consumed every bit of happiness left in her body and only the memories of you replayed in her mind. 

She felt the air leave her lungs and the tears wouldn't stop flowing. 

You on the other hand were sitting at the edge of the bed waiting for Bada when you saw flashing blue and red lights. 

You knew what was going on and you didn't care. Bada loved you and you knew that. You saved her from her fiance and that's all that matters. 

So you lived your days in solitary confinement. You called her number every day and sometimes she would pick up but never speak. She would never speak and would just let you talk, listening to your voice. You wrote letters to Bada and sent them to the diner. 

The diner...where your twisted love story began...

Thank you for reading 🩵

[redwidow616]

Thunderbolts Essay:

tagging some people who I think might want to read this: @loulooser @ncttcday @endofanera-startofanage

Okay so I haven't seen a marvel movie in forever, not even the captain America one, but i knew about the president turning into red hulk (?) thing but nothing apart from that. I was honestly kinda scared that this movie would be bad since, let's be honest, quality really has somewhat declined, and mainly of course that they would pair yelena up with someone but that didn't happen so yayyyy 🤗 okay im gonna get to the actual review part now.

The beginning shot was already so good and set the main focus on what this movie would really be about: depression and struggling. Yelena going on assignments in that hoodie tho made me laugh a little cus girl that does not seem practical?? Also I forgot how much I love her accent, I really do (also reminds me of Wanda's since they're both eastern european). It made me happy to see that she's still in contact with Alexei even tho I knew that already from seeing posters, but I love their dynamic also because it seems so unrealistic they would act like that at first, but when you think about it that's really what they are to each other, father and daughter. Then the court/trial scene bucky as a politician omg it was hilarious how much he talked like one already but also looked like he was so done with everything.

I love Valentina so much, she's such a bitch and she sucks and is so calculating and fucked up in everything she does but I can't explain it I kinda love that about her. Mel was also really funny, I can't believe they managed to introduce a completely new character that's cool on top of expanding on the other characters in the movie who we knew.

The vault scene was also really cool, but I have to ask is that the vault from aos????? Because I thought I recognised that name but I don't remember what happened to the vault there so idk. I was kinda disappointed that they killed taskmaster off so fast, when she was in all the posters and I don't really see the point in it because they only had that one scene where Ava and Yelena talked about it and she looked a little guilty but apart from that nothing 😐. The scene after they got out of the inciniration room was kinda funny ofc but that was the point, i don't have a lot to say to that. Except of course the memory yelena saw and how tragic it was and how we keep learning awful things about the red room (and will probably continue to). Them climbing up the elevator duct was also really funny and I loved every instance where Ava and Yelena made fun of Walker. It was also so funny how yelena tied bob to herself to fight omg, he really is just her adopted stray, I love it. John of course fucking everything up and then Bob sacrificing himself. And Valentina being such an awful person again during the gala and the raiding of the vault, I love women who suck. Alexei picking them up omg, considering how dark the topic of this movie was it did have a lot of comic relief but it didn't feel wrong, it always made sense in the moment. Then Buckyyyyyy!!!!! He looked so done again I love him, he just wants to be at home and not read the packages from the senators, but that scene was really really cool visually and not too long, because I often get bored very fast during action scenes but this one was good.

[atricksterproblem]

Trial By Fire

Link to AO3

Papa V Perpetua x Original Character (any gender)

Tags: ENM, EUM, CFNM, Embarrassment, Situational Humiliation, Teasing, Blushing, Love, Lust, Exhibitionism, Masturbation, Collars, Safewords, Aftercare

Summary: V's partner has arranged a particularly challenging scene for him. Tonight he's been collared and taken to a house party full of strangers. He knows his partner's going to spring something on him, but as pre-arranged, he doesn't know precisely when or what.

When the time comes, he'll have to follow his exhibitionistic desires farther than he ever has before, and he may even learn something about himself in the process. Assuming he doesn't die of embarrassment first.

Headcanon Notes: Quick note on the headcanons used in this AU: V is half-demon. His demonic father belonged to House Lilith. Her House is devoted to the sin of lust. Terzo's demon-sire also came from this House, by the way, but Terzo's sire was an incubus. V's father was one of Lilith's enforcers (the guardians and assassins of Her court).

V was questioning his sanity. It was far from the first time he’d done so tonight.

His partner, Satan bless them, was full of ideas. This was more than a little terrifying. He wasn’t sure why he’d agreed to this. Except that he was sure, really, if he were being honest with himself. It felt like madness, but he couldn’t seem to resist. He was filled with some combination of sick dread and excited anticipation. He wasn’t at all sure which one was uppermost, but here he was.

The collar his partner had locked around his neck tonight felt tight, and he ran a finger under it nervously. Again.

It was a measure of duration, in this case. For as long as it was on him, he was liable to experience…something. At some time while he was wearing it. He wouldn’t know when, and he wouldn’t know precisely what, until it happened. His partner was the one deciding that, although he had a pretty good idea of the sort of thing it was likely to be.

Which is why he had agreed to this in the first place. For this one night, he would permit himself to take an unknowable risk. He’d still have his safeword, but he knew himself well enough to know that it would take an awful lot to make him use it, and he believed his partner had a fair idea of his limits.

He hoped.

He’d been brought to a late night house party full of people he didn’t know, but his partner did. People from outside the Abbey, not familiar with the band or the Church. Perhaps 20 to 30 people milling around a few common rooms, drinking and talking.

So far, everything had been normal. There had been introductions here and there, and small talk. Not his favorite activity, but nothing he hadn’t had to put up with in the past.

The anticipation was sickening.

What would they do to him? He was half-expecting to get pantsed, except that he doubted he’d be let off that easy.

Knowing his partner, they wouldn’t have gone to all this trouble for something as simple as that. Hell, they hadn’t even warned him when they stole the towel he was wearing and locked him out of their hotel room.

The thought of these things was a little more interesting than he should probably linger over in public, though. He liked wearing tight pants, but there were some things they simply couldn’t hide.

Which he also liked.

His mind continued its well-worn path, spinning in circles. His stomach was in knots.

What would they do to him? And when?

The party went on. It had been quite late when it started, now it was later still, and most of the people there were at least a little tipsy. The main common room was pretty loud.

And then, suddenly, his partner was louder.

“Attention, people! I have an announcement to make.”

The conversations died down as everyone looked their way.

His throat went dry. Oh fuck. This was whatever they’d been planning, he just knew it. His palms were sweaty. He felt his heart begin to race.

Whatwasitwhatwasitwhatwas--

“My lovely partner here,” they went on, gesturing in V’s direction, “made the mistake of losing a little bet he had going, and now he has to pay a forefeit. This will require an audience.”

They smirked. “Who wants to watch?”

Nobody left the room. Several of them were snickering and elbowing one another. Clearly something entertaining was in the offing, and they didn’t mean to miss it.

Roughly 15 to 20 people, men and women both.

His partner turned to him. “All right, love.”

The evil grin they gave him then made his hair stand on end.

“Strip.”

His heart skipped a beat.

Oh, Satan. How would he make himself do it? This was so much more than any of his little games had been. He’d known he was in for something like this, but now it was happening, now it was real. He swallowed hard.

Don’t think about it, he told himself. Pretend you’re alone. Don’t look.

He couldn’t. There was no ignoring it. Everyone was looking at him now, waiting to see what he would do. Some of them just looked amused. Some were squirming a little. A few looked like they’d been given an unexpected gift.

All he had to do was unwrap it.

His hands were shaking. It was difficult to manage the buttons of his shirt; he had to pull off his gloves first to do it. He could already feel the weight of their attention. He gritted his teeth, forced himself to finish it. Tossed the shirt aside.

Had the room gotten colder? His nipples were hard.

He pulled off his boots and socks. There was no more stalling he could do. This was it.

Moving his hands to the laces of his pants was one of the most difficult things he’d ever done. He tried to tell himself it didn’t matter, they were so tight anyway and he was already hard and everyone could see it so would it really be so different?

He couldn’t fool himself. It was different. His face was flushed. His heart was pounding. He was going to have to do this. He was going to have to pull his pants down in an entire fucking roomful of strangers.

He undid the laces. The feeling of all those eyes on him was nearly unbearable.

Now or never.

He took hold of the waistband and slid them down in one quick motion. Stepped out of them.

Looked up.

That was a mistake.

Everyone was focused on him, some laughing, some blushing and giggling. He heard a few wolf whistles.

He squeezed his eyes shut and automatically covered himself with his hands as quick as he could, even though he knew it didn’t matter, everyone had seen him, and worse, they’d seen how achingly hard he was. His face felt like it was on fire, the rest of him felt cool air where it usually wasn’t and the unbearable weight of so many stares. He couldn’t stand it. He was dying of embarrassment, he’d never done anything like this, never deliberately exposed himself in front of so many people. He could hear their comments, their laughter, and Satan help him, he could feel their lust. It was agony, but it was so deliciously exciting.

All of this had been a matter of moments.

“No, sweetie. Eyes open. Hands down.”

Oh, Satan. He forced himself to look back at the crowd, to meet those stares, drinking him in, enjoying how embarrassed he was, some just openly longing. It was like being licked by tongues of flame on every inch of skin.

Moving his hands to his sides? That was even worse.

He’d always at least been able to cover himself that way. However pathetic a shield it might have been, it was something.

He was already blushing so much he thought he might faint. His self-consciousness was nearly unbearable.

When he forced himself to do it he had to dig his fingertips into his thighs a little just to keep his hands where they were, the urge to cover up was so strong.

All this time, there had been whistles and catcalls. Now there were more. It was bad enough to be forced to let strangers see his cock. The fact that he was painfully hard let everybody know how much he fucking loved it.

He bit his lip. Nothing in his life had ever been so humiliating, and it felt so incredibly hot that it just embarrassed him all over again.

He realized his partner was speaking.

“See how much this turns him on? Such a cute little slut. Don’t be fooled by those blushes, he craves the attention.”

Oh god oh fuck the shame of it too much he couldn’t he COULDN’T--

He felt his cock twitch, felt a bead of pre-cum form at the tip. Right out in the fucking open. Nowhere to hide.

“Tsk. Poor boy. You’re dying for it, aren’t you? You’d better take care of that.

Do it. Make yourself come.”

The room erupted. Some people were calling encouragement through laughter, some were red-faced, some were catcalling louder than ever.

His eyes flew open, went wide. He turned to his partner, gave them a wild-eyed look. Were they serious? Did they really mean--

“It’s that or your safeword, V. You decide.”

Unimaginable.

He was sure it would kill him. He was horrified. He couldn’t.

But he wanted it. Satan’s name, he did. It made no sense to him, but the worse the idea made him feel, the more he felt driven to do it. Fuck, the thought of it, stroking himself in front of a roomful of people, letting them see just how he liked it, letting them hear him--

He’d been through so much, so overwhelmingly much, that he was burning inside. It couldn’t have been more than a handful of minutes, but it felt like years. He’d taken all he could handle; he was a bundle of nerves. And still, despite the agony of it, despite his unending blushes, there was this. The core of this thing that he coveted despite himself.

He realized something, in that frozen moment.

He had an audience.

This was performance.

And no one, no one in the whole of the Unholy Church understood performance quite like he did.

He almost wanted to laugh.

How many nights had he been on stage in front of a crowd, teasing them for all they were worth, channeling every lustful impulse that was the birthright of his House just to make them scream his name?

If you follow me, I’ll give you everything you want, he’d told them.

Oh, yes. This he could do.

And wouldn’t his fans lose their fucking minds if they could see him now.

He knew he was still flushed. He bit his lip, lowered his head a little.

Looked up through half-lowered eyelids. Let his mismatched eyes burn, let them smoulder.

And then, slowly, he smiled.

His audience stilled a bit, at least the lustful ones did. He’d made them a promise with that smile.

Now he meant to deliver.

He arched his back a little, head thrown back, and ran his hands slowly down his chest. He lingered, teasing his nipples, let them hear his breath catch. He moved his hands down, bringing their gaze with him, highlighting the treasure trail, the soft curls below it. Everywhere he touched felt like it left a spill of heat in its wake, magnified by the feel of eyes on his every move.

Yes, he thought. Oh, yes. This. This was what he wanted.

He ran a hand slowly over his cock, stroking upward, lingering. Let out a moan, felt a shiver. He held nothing back. He heard a few gasps and caught breaths, and he knew he had them now.

They were his.

He took himself in hand, now, just the way he liked it. Slowly at first, drawing it out, all but edging himself, and fuck, it felt so good, it was so much more intense like this, sharing it with strangers. He heard himself making soft, pleasured sounds, he couldn’t help them, didn’t want to.

He couldn’t wait anymore and he stroked himself harder now, felt his breath go ragged, let it build. He was so close, he’d never felt like this, not alone, not even with a partner watching, this was beyond all that, amplified by every lustful gaze. He felt them wanting him and it broke the last of his restraint. He came hard, crying out from the force of it, spilling over his hand, breathless in its wake. He let his breath slow, and he opened his eyes.

His audience was a mess.

Some of the men looked pretty uncomfortable, but hadn’t looked away all the same. Some of the rest of the people there must’ve been taking care of themselves or each other, judging from the flushed faces and the hands that had been under skirts or down pants, only now being withdrawn.

Only the devil and he himself would ever know exactly how much it took to restrain the smug, shit-eating grin he’d otherwise have had on his face right then.

He turned to where his partner had been standing before all that. They were still there. They were just looking at him, slightly awestruck, judging from their expression. They shook their head and went to get him a towel for cleanup. He dressed calmly after that, saying nothing. Went to wash up a bit, and followed his partner out of the house without a word.

Only once they were back in the car did he permit that grin to show. His partner just gaped at him for a moment and then burst out laughing.

“Oh, you motherFUCKER. That’s what you were up to, huh?”

“Only at the end. I think-- I think I went through so much at first that I came out the other side, somehow. Like it burned out of me.”

“Satan’s name, V. That was…I don’t think I even know what that was. Actually no, I think I do. That was all you, wasn’t it? Your inborn House magic. You used it instinctively.”

“It’s part of me. I wouldn’t know where it ends and I begin. It was just-- my perspective changed. It was very strange. But very good.”

“Damn fucking right it was. I’m going to take you home, my love, and then I’m going to make a few demands of you myself if you don’t mind. You may have gotten off but I still haven’t, you know!”

He smiled, leaning back in his seat. “Don’t worry, angel. You will.”

[swifty-fox]

Fanfic Cutting Room Floor

What didn't make it into your fic? Tell us about a scene, a character, a plot point, a theme - anything (!) that didn't make it into your fic and why, and tag up to three people who might want to take part, too.

tagged by @middlingmay what a fun idea!!

This is a cut scene from Little Beasts part 4. I was planning for the skirt sex to take a different direction and it just. felt forced and inauthentic to where they were at mentally. I went back and forth sooo much and ran it by @stereobone and @reallylilyreally soooo much but ultimately decided that Gale topping for the first time needed to happen from his POV. I think it turned out much better in the final product!

“I want you to fuck me,” he says, the words rolling off his tongue wildly, “I want you to fuck me in this skirt.” 

Gale lets out a shocked, breathless sound. His fingers are knotted on the duvet on either side of him and he’s looking at John in shocked awe, something burning flickering in his gaze. Something John’s been chasing this whole time, that thread of honest want that the Priest kept locked up tight.

John leans forward and sucks Gale into a slow heavy kiss, fucks his tongue through the other mans mouth over and over until Gale is following the rhythm with his whines and rolling his body back down against John’s cock.

“It’s been months, Father,” John breathes, “I’ve been laying here at night fucking myself on my fingers and thinking how good your cock feels down my throat and wishing it was inside me again.” 

“You want that?” Gale asks, and for a single second John thinks this is the most honest Gale has ever been with him.

He presses another kiss to Gale’s mouth, nibbles his bottom lip and smiles.

 “So bad,” he breathes.

The two of them spend long momvents staring at each other, Gales eyes flicking back and forth over John’s face as if really making sure he was willing to give up the reins like that. John smirks at him and leans down to nuzzle against Gale’s neck.

“As much as I love your pretty cunt,” he murmurs, “I want to know how loud you whimper when you come inside me.” 

Gale’s mouth drops open, gasping out a desperate little whine and John reads the want in his eyes when he pulls back.

The lube is tucked under the pillow, shoved there after last night when John had fingered Gale to completion with his cock down his throat. He’s grabbing it, sliding his briefs down his legs and slicking his fingers, sticking them in two at a time because he’s a big man and he likes the burn. Bites the sting into Gale’s collarbones and groans softly in his ear. 

“Feels fuckin’ good Father.” He murmurs

Gale shivers, his eyes locked on the movement of John’s wrist behind him.

“You wanna try?” 

“I’ve-” Gale wets his bottom lip and casts his eyes to the ceiling. 

John wonders if he’s praying. He wonders if God has ever answered Gale in moments like these, or if whatever powers that be had turned its back on them both. 

“I’ve never done it for anyone before,” he finishes.

John groans and drops his head onto Gale’s shoulder, biting his tongue against the hot lick of flame up his spine, “Shit, Padre, you’re gonna make a girl blush.”

Gale tsks at him sharply and John snickers, nuzzles his lips along his neck with a quiet hum.

“Scoot down.” 

Gale goes down further onto his back, John moves up and forwards, slipping his fingers out of himself with a shiver. Gale leans up to mouth at John’s thigh, pressing his kisses to the crease of his hipbone and John can’t help the sound he makes just like every time he does when the priest went and snatched pleasure for himself. 

It’s fucking killer, seeing you let yourself want.

He uses his own fingers to slick up Gale’s, watches that elegant hand with it’s graceful wrist disappearing between his legs as he fists his own cock lightly and then theres a slow circle and tentative push. Two digits, a little chill and more than a lot hesitant but John tilts his head back and groans in encouragement. There’s a gasp below him and the fingers press up inside John with sudden pressure, crooking searchingly and John laughs, looking down to see Gale watching him with open-mouthed awe. 

It’s a squeeze but he bends down to kiss him, sucks on Gale’s tongue and prods back with his own, rides his fingers and letting Gale feel every gasp and rumble echoing in his chest. 

The other man is watching him, watching his face rather than his body, with that same devastated awe and John tosses him a wink. Gale’s fingers catch inside him, rough and dragging and a little clumsily too hard but the sting jolts through John’s body like electricity. He’s dripping his release onto Gale’s stomach, John can feel his hard cock brushing against his inner thigh and practically shivers with the anticipation. 

A hand on the back of Gale’s neck, he shifts them down onto the mattress, settles back against the pillow and tugs the priest between his legs. Throws his own over Gale’s hips and bites the other man’s lip until skin breaks. Gale growls down deep in his throat as John suctions the coppery flavor from his lip. 

“C’mon, Buck,” John cajoles.

Two fingers really isn’t enough but John’s not exactly opposed to self destruction and he muffles a noise into his palm as the length of Gale sinks into him. Above him Gale is a sight, mouth open and tongue slick and bright and his gaze fixed where he was pressed hips flush to John’s ass, the skirt half draped over John’s drooling cock. 

Gale reaches down with one hand to fist the skirt out of the way, pumps his hips a few times and John gasps through his teeth with every brutal stretch. The bed creaks as Gale fucks forward again, a weak sigh of pleasure escaping his throat. John grins at him, angles his hips so Gale’s hitting him perfectly every time.

“I’ve thought about this so fuckin much, doll. Knew you’d love it-”

“Shutup,” Gale grunts, something slightly ruined in his voice, hips stuttering.

John laughs at him, reaches up to pull him into a kiss and offers him another groan. 

And then Gale’s phone rings, the ID tag coming up in bright letters.

They both freeze, Gale craning his neck to read and then he’s reaching for the phone, the other bracing on the pillow by John’s head. John makes a noise of disbelief. 

“Seriously?”

“It’s Huglin – just –” 

“Jesus,” John says and Gale shushes him, answering the phone with a gruff hello. 

John can’t make out his words but he can hear the irritating pitch, the rhythm of somebody bitching and John noses his way up Gale’s shoulder. Presses silent kiss after silent kiss to the chill skin along Gale’s collarbone and feels the other man shiver. Gale pinches him and John just nips back, slips a hand around the back of Gale’s neck to pull him down to his shoulder. He tickles the sweaty strands and plants his feet on the mattress to fuck down onto Gale’s cock. 

The priest's whole body goes rigid and he pinches John a second time, harder. John bites him right back and does it again. Gale exhales so sharply John feels it against his cheek. Ignoring the next pinch he continues the slow pace, holding Gale by the scruff with one hand, the other guiding his hips into the eager welcome of John’s body. Gale is breathing in slow, measured breaths, and John presses a tender kiss to his temple before reaching up to tug the phone free. He sets it to speaker phone, presses the mute button and sets it on the table before gripping Gale’s hip and flipping their positions. 

tagging @reallylilyreally @blixabargelds @stereobone

[theyanderespecialist]

Brothers (Scenario) Platonic Yanderes Sanemi&Genya X Younger Sister (All adults)

[Hello, this is a Request from Tumblr, and right off They are ALL Adults and the Reader is a lesbian in this! Her Brothers are platonic yanderes which they are NOT Romantic! So let's do this! 

(Reminder To me: TRY AND REMEMBER TO TAG THE PERSON WHEN YOU POST IT ON TUMBLR)  @eyeofthetiger501

(Disclaimer: This is Platonic and not romantic at all! Sanemi and Genya are Platonic yandere in this! THERE IS NO SWEET HOME ALABAMA!!!) 

Disclaimer: Aoi is straight in canon! This is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all! 

Disclaimer: All the characters are aged up to adult Genya is 20, Sanemi is 25, and Reader just turned 18! 

Disclaimer: Genya and Sanemi are Not Yandere In canon! This is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all! Simping for fictional characters or wanting them to be platonic for you! Is fine! Just do not be illegal or gross about it! You know who you are! You dirty, Flaky, Biscuits! Yanderes are not ideal partners to have in real life! Also, remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon!) 

(Genya Shinazugawa and Sanemi Shinazugawa) (Overprotective Brothers) 

(No One's POV) 

Aoi and (Name) have been dating for a few months now. Aoi had taken care of her, and (Name) ended up working in the Butterfly Mansion with her. It made both of her overprotective brothers glad that their little precious sister was now safe and sound. (Name) and Aoi were talking about when they should talk about their relationship it is the late 1910s so it is not as acceptable. For them to be together. (Name) promised no matter what she would always love Aoi and Aoi agreed the same to her (Name). 

They were sitting down in (Name's) room and Aoi was spooning (Name) from behind. They did enjoy this time together. (Name) was unaware that her brothers were coming to visit her! 

"(Name)!" Genya's voice calls as he opens the door and both he and Sanemi freeze, seeing their sister partially undressed with Aoi!  "Genya! Sanemi!" She cries out and throws the blanket over herself her girlfriend. "Get Out!" 

They quickly left and closed the door. (Name) hides her face in the blanket and Aoi reassures her that it is going to be fine. What they did not know both brothers were pissed off that Aoi was corrupting their sweet little sister! She does not need love! She just needs her brothers! 

Aoi leaves and the brothers both glare at her. (Name) then waits for her brothers to come in. She took a deep breath she had to tell her brothers how she was dating Aoi. 

"What was that?" Sanemi asks seriously. He needed to know what that was! 

"I was laying in bed, with my girlfriend." (Name) admits. "Me and Aoi have been seeing each other." She tells them the honest truth. 

They looked at each other as if silently agreeing on something. "Alright." Genya and Sanemi say together. "Just be safe."  (Name) felt an uneasy feeling in her gut, she felt something was not right. 

And it was not right. Sanemi breaks into Aoi's room with his brother Genya to confront Aoi. 

"What the hell are you doing he-" Aoi did not get to finish as Sanemi backhanded her.  "Shut up!" He snaps at her and she is on the floor shaking.  "You think you can steal our little sister! That you can taint her!" Sanemi shouts. "Who do you think you are? Trying to take OUR Family away from us!?" 

Aoi was shaking in fear. Genya spoke up.  "You did not know that (Name) is ours, so we won't kill you, yet!" He says. "But if you do not break up her tonight, we will kill you and feed your corpse to demons!"  Aoi was so scared she could not move.  "You have three hours," Sanemi says and the two of them left. 

Aoi was crying for almost two hours. She loved (NAme) but she did not want to die! She made her choice and got up. Drying her face. She had to break up with (Name). She feels awful about it, but she has to protect herself!  She made it to (Name's) room, she knocked on the door holding back her tears. "(Name)?" She calls and (Name) opens up the door.  "Aoi it i-" She starts but Aoi cuts her off.  "I have to break up with you, I am sorry, it is not you! It is me, I-I don't love you." Aoi then turned on her heel and left tears running down her face. 

(Name) stared at Aoi then tears began to rush down her face and she sobbed in the entryway to her room. 

Sanemi and Genya were watching in the shadows. They knew (Name) was no longer with Aoi, and they will keep it like this! Their sister did NOT need anyone but her brothers! She does not need love or romance! All she needed was Genya and Sanemi, HER Family! 

The grin and knew that if Aoi tried anything they would kill her! 

[YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS another chapter done! I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter here, and please stay sexy, all of my supper sexy muffins!] 

[librivore42]

Well now that I've been fully victimized by Luxson (Samux????? what is the ship name there lmao) I obviously need to up the ante: for Lux x Samson "to drink together after a shared traumatic experience" from the comfort prompts?? 👀

I went a little off-base with this prompt, because there's no shared traumatic experience except possibly Just Existing In the Gallows lmao. But when the muse hits you, you must comply! Drinking and trauma ARE included! For @thedasweekend

Words: 1462

Characters: Raleigh Samson, Lux

~~~~

"Ser Samson."

He didn't even need to look up to know who that flat voice belonged to.

"Ser Lux," he said sardonically, shooting one of his more charming smiles up at her as he took a slow pull of his drink. "Am I late for patrol?"

Lux blinked down at him slowly, pale lashes flickering as they caught the light.

"No."

Eloquent as always. Still, she didn't really need to string more than a few words together, with a sweet face like that. Shame she stood like a parade instructor and stared at you like a damn Chantry statue trying to pick out your worst sin. Not that Samson cared about hiding them if she could spot them, they added character.

She could do with a little more knowledge of sin. Might make her less serious all the time.

The charming smile still didn't crack her as she tried to grapple with the rest of what she clearly wanted to say.

"I. Need advice. If I am not. Bothering you?"

"Advice?" he said, leaning back in his chair and propping a boot against the leg of the table, eyebrows high. "Didn't think you'd come to me."

Sure, she wasn't spoiled for choice when it came to people who'd talk to her, but the two of them weren't exactly friends. "What's the matter, was Thrask too busy for you today?"

The older man had taken to Lux like he was desperate for a daughter, and she as if she'd never had a father before. She seemed to go to him for everything, tagging at his heels as guilelessly as a newborn pup under all that armour and training. Samson was surprised Thrask hadn't warned her away from him, if he was being perfectly honest. And yet here she was, awkwardly hovering in his space as if he had 'advisor' painted across his forehead.

Her eyes flicked away self-consciously at the question, and a sudden grin split his face. "Oh? Something you don't want to talk to daddy about?"

A baffled blink. He buried a snort of laughter into his empty glass and waved at her to sit. "Thrask," he clarified. "I mean Thrask."

"Oh. No, it is. Not like that," she said uncertainly, settling herself with that ridiculously straight-backed posture.

"Aw, and here I was hoping you'd gotten interesting," he said with a grin. "Something salacious you don't want to disappoint him with."

There was the crack, his best one yet if he did say so himself. She gave him a startled blink, redness speeding over her face as she caught onto the extremely obvious implication. "No I. That isn't. I."

"Relax," he said, amused at the way her shoulders deflated in some relief. "Drink?"

"I… do not. Find it pleasant."

"'Course you don't." Did she do anything that was even remotely fun? He just shrugged it aside. "So it's boring, big surprise. Hit me with you problem."

"It is nothing bad."

"I figured."

"It is just not something… Ser Thrask can help me with. But you are good. At talking to people."

It was just as well he'd finished his drink, or it would have ended up on the table as he let out a sharp, surprised laugh.

"You're coming to me for people skills?"

She nodded so earnestly, and the weirdest part was that it made complete, logical sense. Samson was very good at being personable, at reading the room and giving people what they wanted to hear. And he was pretty sure none of that was going to be in her wheelhouse.

"Not sure how much I can help you either," he mused, kicking back further as he folded his arms. "You're not the type. Too straightforward. Too blunt."

Too earnest, easier to read than a signpost. Still, with how much she faded into the background, he was sure she heard a lot more than anyone realised. And she had a terrifying memory, knowing everyone's rotations and duties, where anyone was likely to be at any given time. That could be useful, if she was grateful.

He had always been hard to read, harder to pin down. Always knowing which way the wind blew, who to please, where to give his best salutes.

Ironic, then, that he was the one who ended up in the gutter. And today, with the gutter being a particularly shitty place to be, he wondered again if the Maker had just had it out for him.

The lyrium had burned so many empty spaces inside him that only it could fill. But when he couldn't afford it, and the emptiness grew too much, he tried and failed to fill those spaces with the worst alcohol he could find, the kind that could strip paint and made thinking an optional activity.

"Samson?"

He still didn't need to look up to know who that flat voice belonged to.

The loss of the Ser shouldn't have rankled him so much at this point, but all his wounds felt raw and fresh, and he bared his teeth at her as she knelt carefully, like approaching a feral dog on the street.

He might as well have been one, the way he growled and swiped a clumsy arm at her, which she simply caught and used to lever him to his feet. He glared blearily at her left ear so he wouldn't have to look in her eyes and find an expression of pity or disdain, which he'd quite had his fill of from his old Order brothers and sisters.

"Where is your home?"

"Get off," he said instead, not enough power in his soaked and heavy limbs to push her away as he wanted. Grateful and incensed in equal measure that she did not comply.

"Where is your home?" she repeated, infuriatingly calm, until he had no choice but to let her manhandle him towards what could barely, charitably, be called a hovel, shouldering the door open to manoeuvre him inside.

"Sit anywhere," he said airly, gesturing broadly to the one single chair as he sagged against her. She knelt a fraction, shifting to stop him from smacking his face directly into her pauldron, and he ended up in the crook of her neck. Freezing so suddenly that she stumbled as her forward moment to the bed was arrested.

"Samson?"

"You stink of it," he said into her neck, and he could see the baffled blinking in his memory without having to even look at her face. "The lyrium."

"Oh."

That made no sense, but he was a few days too far and a few bottles too deep, and wasn't interested in making sense. He could swear she smelled of it, her skin humming with promise like a bottle of top shelf booze he wanted desperately to crack open, to tear the cork off with his teeth and just drain it dry.

"You need to rest."

"I need my life back. Or Meredith to fall into the sea."

"I. I am sorry, Samson," she said, her voice gentle, careful as she all but carried him to the bed and pushed him into it. More personable than he'd ever remembered it being. "If you wish. I can try to find you a job?"

"I have a job," he pointed out as she knelt to take off his boots, leaning in to try and see if her hair smelled like lyrium too. "It's just been hard times."

She looked up at him then, her eyes deadly serious, and he quickly pulled his face back before they smacked into each other.

"Samson."

"Don't Samson me."

"… Raleigh?"

"That's not…" he laughed despite himself, exhausted and exasperated, and fell sideways onto the bed. "Go away."

"But—"

"You've done your charitable duty, Ser Lux. They should give you a medal."

"That is not why I— I want to help."

He sucked a breath through his teeth, pretending to consider. "Not sure how much you can help me. You're not the type."

"The type?"

"The type that's good company for a cold bed and a lonely night." He arched his eyebrows. "Unless you've done a lot more than just learn to talk since I was last in the Gallows."

He missed, he realised, the satisfaction of seeing her redden as he hit on an implication that was obvious enough that even she couldn't miss it.

"No."

"Thought not. So what, you're just going to sit here? Make sure I don't go walking off the docks, or swallow my tongue in a drunken fit in the night?"

She nodded earnestly, all soft blonde hair and big eyes and lyrium smell, and duty and responsibility and not the slightest interest.

"Yes."

Andraste's burning backside, this night was going to kill him if the alcohol didn't do it first.

[goshen-applecrumbledore]

20 fanfic author questions

tagged by @runawaydr3amerao3 to do this, excited as always to talk about myself, let's gooooooo

1. How many works on AO3?

52 and I can only ballpark how many have been orphaned. probably about 12.

2. Total AO3 word count?

953,146. Jesus christ

3. Top 5 fics by kudos?

all of these are old as hell which is why they're top. they are not all good.

transposition ciphers (9,010) fma, roy/ed

the hang of being alive again (3,600) the raven cycle, adam/ronan

not funny (3,573) check please (eugh), holster/ransom

awful wonderful (3,564) naruto, kakagai

hard reset (3,162) fma, roy/ed

4. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, technically, just spn, the bear, true detective and house md. but fma is never far from my mind. my otp no matter how much time passes...

5. Do you respond to comments?

Up until very recently I never did because it never occurred to me. I wasn't trying to be a dick, I just didn't know I was supposed to. then I went through a period during spn after learning that where I felt bad and replied to everything. Now I reply to comments that ask me a question or are thought-provoking. I want to answer and to applaud. people leave comments that are more beautiful than the actual fic, you people are very smart and insightful.

6. Angstiest ending?

I'm not good at writing sad endings!! I believe in love! but, for this audience, worthless cartography. sam and dean hook up for the first time right before ahbl pt 2 and then sam dies, so dean thinks it's his fault in a divine retribution kind of way, so when sam is alive again, dean rebuffs him. I always meant to write a second part, but without it, it's pretty sad.

7. Fic with the happiest ending?

I was going to say pine sweat but I remembered it takes place in S5 so sam is dead within a fortnight lmao. it's definitely hard reset, an fma roy/ed fic. it's 15 years post-canon and after a lot of yearning and trying to make it work, they make it work. very blue skies everybody wins.

8. Do you get hate?

Not much these days, but I used to. mostly for writing roy/ed, with a big age/power gap, and for my novel with the same. for writing hockey rpf ships people didn't like, someone threatened to call my office and tell my bosses I was a pedophile. also when I was 13 I wrote a very OOC house/wilson fic and someone said it sucked and I got so mad I started writing original works out of spite (because nobody could tell me they were ooc)

9. Do you write smut?

Very much so, as a treat/reward/resolution to a story, much like sex is irl, lol. I rarely write smut on its own (blood sacrifice sex magic type of thing would be the closest, or middle name) not because I have anything against it but because in my own work I wanna feel very much like it's THE characters, whoever they are, and plot is the easiest way to do that. if I wanna just crank my hog I can do that on my own time.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Nosiree, I'm boring. no crossovers or AUs. barry tells me I will want to write an spn/x files crossover though, and because he's the one that got me into spn I've learned not to tell him he's wrong.

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

Yes actually, someone put huge swaths of one of my yakuza fics into a majima/reader fic. I opened a ticket with AO3 but they said it wasn't clear cut enough. I didn't pursue because I don't care.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, this is my favourite thing!!! such a compliment and a beautiful reminder, in english speaking internet and under the shadow of the US, that there are other folks online. several of my spn fics have been translated into mandarin and 2 of my expanse fics have been translated into russian.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Once, in hockey fandom, with someone I didn't like very much. she wasn't a good writer and it was a disaster. I don't remember what happened to it. I wouldn't do it again lol.

14. All time favourite ship?

If I'm honest it's gotta be roy/ed from fma. what if this very annoying kid sauntered into your life but then he grows up and he's brilliant and noble and beautiful and haunted and also the specialist boy in the world, but you're a decorated military official in a corrupt dictatorship and the kid hates your guts and you will never be able to forgive yourself for your past war crimes so why should this beautiful genius like you anyway?? anyway. im over that now

15. WIPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

A wincest john finds out kind of full-house-of-wincest type situation. somebody with a fundraiser fic should email me and tell me to swap their fic to that one. who said that

16. Writing strengths?

Dialogue and canon-complianticity

17. Writing weaknesses?

Nobody tells me what I suck at so I don't FULLY know, but. Speed. Grammar. Flexibility. everything I write sounds like everything else I write and I reuse the same words and idioms, like same song syndrome but for writing. a greatest hits album.

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue?

Only thing I've done in my fics is kind of a crossed-out written words in an epistolary fic. I've maybe had a few french lines in a fic but I don't think so because it was referencing subtitles. haven't read much either, so, no opinions. but I will say it's shit to do a weird patois in your English language dialogue

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Naruto baybeeeee. when I was 11 my sister found my scanned fan art of naruto and sasuke kissing on deviantart. I didn't even think she was on deviantart. 

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Hangdog, easily, but I think that's only because true detective s1 is remarkably rich and good so I'm really just drafting off marty and rust's coattails. but also probably Matryoshka dolls for spn, because it feels very well considered and tied together and intentional and satisfying, to me. but it deserves merit because as any spn fan knows, you gotta have a rich inner universe in order to truly play in their space. cw gets no credit.

EDIT: or, actually, my venture bros fic, lol. there was something very lovely about writing fic for a show that in no way makes me horny. Just a show I love very much.

No tags because I don't know anyone anymore but tag me if you do it because of me and I'll read it!

[antimony-medusa]

I just have vauge thoughts about Fandom, and Creator Notices, and Boundaries, and I'm just gonna ramble for a second here.

Okay, so you end up really liking a show or event to the point that you want to make something for it, generally you want to show it off. You want to share it with other people who like the show or event, and have them go !!!!!!!. That's fun, that's normal. We all want to be enthusiastic about [show/event] together. That's our starting point.

Enter social media and official actor/streamer/writer accounts.

Now fan artists, a good portion of the time, can make their art and then thanks to the wonders of social media, they can go straight up to the actual people who made the show and show their art, and have them go !!!!, and get the actual creators to like it. Maybe not if they're drawing hard gore or NSFW, but if you're drawing a soft canon family moment, or a cyberpunk au, or behind the scenes look illuminated, or kick-ass character design, you can get a creator notice.

Fan writers, by and large, do not get creator notices. This is because looking at art takes two seconds, and reading a fic takes between ten minutes to ten hours. Creators can be out there scrolling art in a way that most of them, frankly, do not have the time to devote to Ao3 searches sorted by kudos. And I think among writers there's a little bit of a sense that that's unfair, and writing is just as much as art as visual art is, so we should be getting creator notices, and we should all act as though we might get a creator notice at any time. On all platforms. Cause what we're doing is real art, right? And we all saw the art get retweeted?

And this sense that creator notices— cause we've all seen them happen with art— spreads until we all think that they could happen at any time. Thanks to the wonders of social media. And very rapidly, the "you can get a creator notice" turns into "the highest honour is a creator notice", and we're all gunning for that, and you SHOULD be gunning for that. You should be looking for the creator to weigh in on your art. You should make sure that there's nothing in your work that the creator doesn't like. If you're an artist, you shouldn't be playing with gender in your art, or draw them being tortured, or anythign NSFW, and if you're a writer, you need to make sure that you don't have anything "weird" in your writing. In practice, let's be honest, this just turns into demonizing NSFW work and saying that anything we don't like is NSFW. Looking at you the "you can't draw the streamers with boobs" discourse.

Anyways, I think going after creator notices is a bad idea for many reasons— a, let them rest, b, bad atmosphere for the fandom, c, let's be honest, an awful lot of fandom stuff is weird from the outside. Let it stay in the fandom.

First thing is like, there are only so many hours in a day. Fan artists can tag their people but it's SO much of a huge and rude demand on someone's time to ask them to read your fic and tell you if it's good. That's the request you make cautiously to your beta reader, and then everybody else on this planet earth gets to opt in to your work. Do not TTS stories to people, do not hand them copies at cons, like— if they want to find it they can find it.

Second thing, creator notices hovering over the fandom like a sword is not a good attitude for creativity. Fan work is supposed to be transformative, it's about taking the original work and going "oh but what if they didn't die" and "what if they lived in space" and "what if they were a family" and "what if they kissed". Gunning towards a creator notice at all times takes you from an independent person following your creativity to a contractor working under someone else's vision. All the time.

Trying to adhere to the source material isn't bad in essence, there's a spectrum of "how do you feel about canon" in fan work that ranges from "trying to hit all the same beats just with a twist" to straight up adversarial attacks, and all of that is fine and part of what fan works are. But if the only stuff that gets written is the stuff that we think the creator would approve of, a) that's stifling to both creativity and people who have an adversarial relationship with canon, you shouldn't start to be branded as "weird within the fandom" cause you're mad at a plot arc b) you very rapidly run into the issue where you're adhering to someone else's morals, and sometimes you don't agree with random person's morals. Anne McCaffrey famously said that fan works were okay as long as you didn't make any of the dragon riders gay. I guesture at you about that. Sometimes a creator is way more comfortable with NSFW stuff than you are, that doesn't mean you should feel forced to make NSFW stuff for their approval! You shouldn't have to 100% agree with someone's vision for an art piece to be able to roll up and go "yes but I think there should be like 50% more evicerations in here" and acting like the creators are the ultimate authority in fan spaces is a bad atmosphere for making fan works.

Sure, absolutely, showrunners get to decide canon. But the whole point of fandom is that sometimes I have a better vision for my story, and maybe I don't want to think about what the creator says at all. If I'm not gunning for the creator's approval, let me stay in my little circle with the creator blocked and adding more pregnancy to the QSMP, or whatever. Follow your bliss.

Third thing, like, okay. There has been a move in fan circles, and especially in mcyt circles, to say that if we just cut the NSFW stuff out, everything we're doing isn't weird, and the creators can look at it. I honestly think this is a failure of both imagination and perspective.

If you have written someone being vivisected, it's gonna be a trifle weird for the actor of that someone to come into contact with that. It is doubly weird if you're depicting a character who shares the same name as the actor. Is it bad to write the vivisection? No, this is fandom, we get to do terrible things to characters here, and that's not for the actors, that's for the audience of two hundred people who saw the words "Schlackity vivisection cannibalism necromancy" and said "clear my schedule, I know what I'm doing tonight". Awesome, continue with the gore.

And like, again, this isn't just NSFW. You can have something that is the fluffiest most platonic story in the world, and I'm saying look at me, look at me honestly, consider this; isn't it going to be just a little bit weird for a grown-ass man to open up a story where they've been aged down to four years old and they're lost and sad and their friends are their family and rescue them and there's cuddling and petting and snackies and pet names and they get their blanket and suck their thumb and take a nap. Look me in the eye and tell me that's not gonna be weird for an adult to read that about their character who shares their name. Okay? We're all on the same page here? Awesome. Is it bad to write kidfic? No. Kidfic rocks. I am your target audience, I am clicking through. I am leaving a keysmash comment. It is also, like, look at me here, focus— it's weird if you're outside the fandom. Platonic? Yes. for the actors/streamers? No. And that's because it's not FOR outsiders to the fandom, it's for the fandom. It's for people who rotate the characters so much that they go 'wouldn't it be sooooo cute if they were babies wouldn't it be adorable', it's not for the actual guys who had a meeting with an accountant today.

MCYT in particular has a horrible practice of saying that because everything has to be for the streamers, nothing can be NSFW unless they've approved it specifically, but somehow everything else is cool? I cannot express to you how much stuff I've read and enjoyed that even the smallest amount of thinking about should let you know that we keep that stuff away from the guys driving the block men around. Fine to write it, I say again, go for it. Please completely divorce yourself of the idea of a creator notice for it at the same time.

Should we show the streamers porn? No. We also should not show the streamers the thing where they're physically abusive parents of their friends. We should not show them the stuff where they're babies. We should not show them things where they're bigots. We should not show them things where they have hybrid instincts that tell them to kidnap someone. Really not sure about showing them a story where they're a cop who takes bribes. Like come on now. Really, as soon as you diverge from canon you're getting into stuff that's probably going to be weird for the crdeators. And that's why again, we don't show it to them, because it shouldn't be for them, it should be for the other people who are like "oh you're doing something fun with the character there, awesome" and click through. Weird for the creators, because it's for us.

Fandom should not be for for the creators. We can make stuff for the creators ocassionally, but I really think it's healthier for the fandom, and probably a lot less weird for the actors/streamers/writers, if we stop acting like what we make is all for them and should be shown to them. Some of it is just for us! That's fine! Make it for the people who have an rss feed for "autistic technoblade" on Ao3! Make it for the people who show up in your inbox asking about your "Philza gets arranged married to a different QSMP guy every week" au! ! Make it for the people who have three spellings of "charlie slimecicle" followed on Tumblr! Make it for the people making helsmit fancams! Make it for the fifteen people who suscribed to you after you posted that fic about the various wilbur bursonas kissing each other! Make it for the people who have Puffychu art saved to their phones! Make it for the fandom!

Leave the creators alone, make the fandom for the fans.

[aston1sh1ng]

SHIPPING INFO.

answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog.

tagged by: burgled from @wid0wd ... tagging: whoever feels like it! Nab it!

what’s your OTP for your muse(s)?

Funnily enough, I think Scott is one of the few characters in the Marvel Roster where I can't come up with a romantic pairing I'm in awe with enough to be an OTP. Canon or not. Platonically, I'm partial to his relationship with Tony, but that's about it. All the more reason to explore potential ships over here!

what are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping?

Anything (NON-TABOO, ILLEGAL OR GROSS) besides Smut. Seems fun, but I'm horrendous at it so I'll often be willing to write preludes and fade-to-blacks on that front.

are you selective when shipping?

Just a little. We need to have at least interacted before, be it IC or OOC. As a rule of thumb, I ship with chemistry and don't do pre-established romantic ships since it takes a lot out of Scott to commit to that kind of thing. He falls fast, but takes a while to really work himself up to a commitment.

how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?

Scott's about 45. So anyone younger than 35's really pushing it ...

how far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW?

Beyond making out, that's NSFW. Meaning we'd fade to black!

who are other muses you ship your muse with?

Okay, well. Kinda same as the OTP question except I'll throw in Darla Deering, Sam Wilson & Reed Richards as little points of interest. But, to be honest, I just like dynamics where the other character is opposite to Scott one way or the other. Or if they underestimated him at the start. Bonus if they're a parent! HUGE bonus.

does one have to ask to ship with you?

Yeah! Promise I don't spit acid. Chances are I'd be at least willing to feel it out with ya!

how often do you like to ship?

Generally, I don't do it much. But that's because my other muses are characters like Dexter Morgan or Charlie Kelly where it would make little sense for them to be in romantic relationships under normal circumstances. Scott is my exception! I want to explore that side of him more.

are you multiship?

Yep!

are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?

I think I'm in the middle ground, but I will freak out once things actually develop - that applies to all sorts of shipping for me, romantic or not. I will try to be normal, but ...

what is your favorite ship in your current fandom?

Bruce Banner x Tony Stark because I'm a very well-adjusted man.

finally, how does one ship with you?

Have we written together? No? Let's do that! Yes? TALK TO ME ABOUT IT! I can get pretty nervy about asking for ships myself so please don't hesitate!