#they want me to respect him but its so hard

[youreverydayfangirl]

Death By A Thousand Cuts

pairing: lando norris x fretwell! reader

summary: y/n y/ln has always been in love with lando, or in which lando brushed y/n off until its too late

warning: angsty tbh, attempted sa, roofie, swearing

a/n: i like this one tbh, also this takes places over a couple years tbh

Y/n wasn't entirely sure when it happened, whether it was love at first sight or something more gradual, all she knew was she was entirely and irrevocably in love with Lando Norris.

Y/n first met Lando when she was 10 and he was 11. To him she was his best mates little sister. He found her childish and annoying. She found him kind and attractive, although she barely saw him because he was always off karting.

The moment that solidified her crush on the boy was when their families went on their first family vacation together. They had booked a holiday house at the beach for a week during summer. Both families had made there way done the beach.

Max and Lando were playing catch on the beach, chatting about random things, there parents were busy gossiping and sunbaking and Flo and Y/n were swimming in the ocean.

"Y/n sweetie, don't swim out too far please." Her mother called out to her and she nodded back.

"I'm gonna give this to my mom so I don't lose it." Flo said, gesturing to the bracelet her grandmother had given her for her birthday. Y/n nodded in response and watched as Flo ran back ashore, heading over to her mom.

Y/n watched everyone, feeling peaceful. Lando was currently watching Max strike out with a girl who was definitely to old for him and Flo was talking to their parents.

Suddenly she was dragged underwater, getting completely disoriented. Her lungs screamed for air, a burning sensation spreading through her chest. She tried to swim to the top, splashing above the water for a split second before being pulled back down.

Her legs were powerless no matter how hard she tried to kick. Her vision was spotty, she struggled to fight off the black spots dancing in her vision when she felt herself being pulled up above the water and dragged onto the beach.

She fell to her hands and knees and began coughing up salt water, someone holding her hair behind her head. She looked up to see Lando looking down at her worried and annoyed.

"Are you crazy? He asked the girl. Before she could answer her parents came over to her wrapping her around in a towel and fussing over her. She felt the blood rush to her cheeks at how she had embarrassed herself but also at the fact that Lando had come to save her.

Y/n looked at the diy grave she had made. Her pet hamster had died and she was holding a full funeral. The Norris' had come aswell, paying there respects.

"I'm sorry about fluffy Y/n." Lando said, moving to stand next to her. She looked up sending him a small, sad smile and he held out a bouquet of flowers for her. They were scrappy, definitely picked from his moms garden which he would get in trouble for later but the thought counted. She gave him large smile and took them from him before wrapping her arms around him.

"Thanks Lan." She said.

"Its alright to cry you know, you don't have to be strong." He said, whispering into the top of her head before planting a kiss on it.

She began crying into the boys chest and he let her until she felt better.

By the time she was 14 Y/n felt so out of place in their little group. Flo, Max and Lando had all become quite close due to their closeness in age and interests. She didn't feel out of place in the social sense, it was more out of place in life. The boys had karting, Flo had riding but what exactly did Y/n have. She had no clue what she wanted to be, a doctor? A journalist? Something in fashion? She just had no clue.

She felt a nudge in her side and turned to look at Lando whos eyes were trained to the TV. He looked at her, "Are you okay?" He whispered to her. She nodded. "Y/n, tell me the truth." She sighed, Lando could always see straight through her.

"No. Yes. I don't know. Its just, I feel so out of place, all of you guys know what you wanna do and I - I just don't know." Lando snorted and Y/ns eyes shot to him.

"What? What's wrong?" She asked, suddenly feeling very self conscious. Lando felt bad seeing the panicked look on her face.

"Sorry, Its just you shouldn't be worried over something like that. Whatever you end up doing is going to be amazing just like you, don't stress Y/n." He said, sincerity in his tone.

She smiled, thankful that he couldn't see how red her face had gotten and turned to face the tv.

Once she had turned 15 two things were pretty obvious. Y/n was head over heels in love with Lando Norris and Lando wasn't interested, shutting her affections down a million times with the excuse of her being Max's little sister.

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2015

yourusername has posted

liked by yourbsfusername, maxfretwell and 234 others

yourusername summer 2015 so far

tagged: yourbsfusername, maxfretwell, landonorris, flonorris

maxfretwelll get off instagram your a baby

yourbsfusername LITERALLY SO FUN

→ yourusername I KNOWWWWW

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Y/n found herself drunkenly dancing with Y/bsf, the girls opting to go to a party instead of staying in. She started dancing with the random guy when she felt herself get pulled away. "Hey." She stuttered out, not coping well with how much she had already had to drink.

"What the fuck are you doing here Y/n."

Lando.

Still, she defiantly crossed her arms, glaring at him. "I'm having fun, what are you the fun police."

Lando faltered at the attitude he got, before glaring at her. "Your too young to be drinking, and your definitely too young to be at Thomas Bakers party." She just rolled her eyes, "I'm sixteen, not a baby anymore."

"Yes you are."

"No I'm not." She said again.

"You sure are acting like one right now, now come on." He said grabbing at her wrist but she refused to move. "Where are we going." She asked him, not wanting to move.

"Home, Max is literally going to kill me." Lando responded, trying to grab at the girl but she refused to budge.

"Y/n."

"Lando." She said back to him, "You know I'm not going to move." She stated, Lando raising his eyebrows at this, as if it were a challenge.

"Really?" Lando asked, challenging her right back, she faltered for a second before nodding firmly. He smirked a little, before grabbing at her waist and tossing her over his shoulder.

"Lando? What the fuck! Put me down." She said, people at the party watching but being to drunk to properly care.

"Nope, your going home Y/n." The girl sighed defeatedly, letting it happen. Lando walked over to his car, putting the girl down and helping her into his front seat.

He hopped in and began to drive back to her house. Y/n looked at the window, resting her head against the glass. Once they got home, Y/n saw a familiar figure standing on the front porch. "Really? You had to call Max?"

"Goodnight Y/n." He said, she rolled her eyes, about to exit the car before she decided to plant a cheeky kiss on his cheek before hopping out of the car.

"Y/n get inside now." Max said sternly.

"But I-"

"Inside." He raised his voice, not shouting but Y/n could tell he was mad. She went inside and watched from her bedroom window as Max and Lando talked about something before Lando drove off. She sighed and fell back on her bed, just wanting the day to be over.

--------------------------

2016

yourusername has posted

liked by yourbsfusername, maxfretwell and 321 others

tagged: yourbsfusername, maxfretwell, landonorris, flonorris

yourbsfusername oh heyyyy

→ yourusername heyyy

flonorris I LOVE YOU AND I MISS YOUUU

→ yourusername I MISS YOUUU

maxfretwell cringe tbh

→ yourusername loser tbh

----------------------------

"Maxiieee." Y/n stumbled out of the kitchen onto the back porch looking around for her older brother. They host was a mutual friend of theirs which is why they had both been invited. The girl was about the fall down the porch steps when an arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her back firmly onto the porch.

"Woah, be careful there little Max." She heard that familiar voice say. She turned around to face him still slightly dazed and confused, a pout on her lips when his words registered in her head. "Landoo." She drunkenly whined, "I told you to stop calling me that, 'm no little. "

The boy laughed, smiling down at her "Yes you are little max," he teased, smiling before noticing the faint tear tracks on her face. Landos body language changed, worry seeping into his gaze. "Y/n whats wrong?" He asked, brushing her hair out of her face so he could see her more clearly.

"Tom." She said shakily, ready to burst into tears. Lando tensed at the mention of the girls boyfriend , a million different things running through his mind, if she was hurt, if he had hurt her. Lando began checking her up and down, making sure she wasn't injured, once he was certain that she was alright he looked back at her.

"What did he do love?" The nickname slipped out, Lando hadn't meant to say it, it just felt so natural. Luckily for him, she didn't catch onto what he said, her brain to scattered to pick up on it.

"He cheated on me. I walked in on him and some chick." She wailed out, throwing herself into Landos arms, a gesture that Lando was not against. Lando wrapped his arms around her waist, rubbing small circles on her back.

"Oh dove, its gonna be okay." Lando rested his head on her hers, squeezing her tightly before pulling away. "I'm gonna take you to the car, can you wait there for me and Max to come out." He spoke softly, waiting for a nod before heading towards the car. Once he walked her to the car he instructed her to wait there while he went back inside to look for Max.

Max came out of the party, far less drunk than the other two and immediately went to his sister, forcing her to look up at him. "Are you okay." He asked her, Y/n just nodded and quietly mumbled something about wanting to go home.

On the car ride back, with Max driving, Lando opted to sit in the back seat next to Y/n who nearly fell asleep on his shoulder. The drive back was silent, no one feeling up to making conversation. When the car stopped Lando looked down at the girl sleeping on his shoulder, "Feeling better?" He croaked out, Y/n turned to look up at him. She paused for a second, absorbing the moment when she felt bile rise up her throat. She paused, trying to undo her seatbelt, before opening the doer landing on the grass, puking. "Ah shit moms gonna kill me." Max groaned while a pair of hands grabbed her hair in a makeshift pony tail, rubbing her back. "Lets get you inside." Lando said, helping the girl up.

When they got to her room, Lando grabbed her a change of clothes passing them to her. "Put these on, I'll be right back."

Lando came back up the stairs, opening the door to Y/ns room. "Look I need you to - oh shit." Lando said, closing his eyes tightly. The drunk girl turned around to look at him, clad in her bra and underwear. "Landoo, can you please help mee get these offf." She said, still clearly drunk. Lando swallowed hard, cursing whatever God was out there. "You can't get it off yourself." The girl shook her head.

He swallowed, putting the things in his hands down before moving the girl towards him. He ran his fingers up her back, definitely slower than he should have, goosebumps forming on her back at the touch. He reached her bra and unbuttoned it slowly, eyes looking at all of her bare skin. He shook his head spinning around. "Now put you shirt on." She did without a fuss.

He then took her to the bathroom, stating that she would regret not taking it off in the morning and while that was true, he really just wanted more time to hang around the girl.

He grabbed a cotton pad and makeup cleaner, instructing her to sit on the bench as he walked between her legs. He gently wiped her makeup off, Y/n looking up at him, admiring his features. "Your pretty you know that." She mumbled, not entirely meaning to say it out loud.

"Oh am I." Lando said teasingly, a grin making its way across his face. "Mhm." She nodded, Lando wiped the last bit of mascara off before looking down into her eyes. The pair stayed their, Y/n could have sworn he leaned in slightly but the jingle of the front door was heard, Max having returned from dropping his girlfriend off. Lando pulled away quickly, throwing the cotton pad in the bin. "Done." He mumbled, ready to walk out the room and never return.

Y/n followed him out of her conjoining bathroom into her room. "Goodnight Y/n." He said, making his way to her bedroom door as she climbed into bed. "Goodnight Lan." She said, the duvet pulled up to her chin at this point. Lando paused at the door to looked at her, "And Y/n?" She hummed in response, "Next time pick someone who isn't a complete dick okay." He continued before closing his door gently.

Y/n felt her hear shatter all over again, it was just a reminder that no matter how much she wanted to, Y/n and Lando were never going to be together.

The next day when Y/n went to pick up her stuff from Toms she noticed a huge black eye but Tom refused to tell her how it got there.

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2017

yourusername has posted

liked by yourbsfusername, maxfretwell and 678 others

yourusername officially the big 17

tagged: landonorris, yourbsfusername, maxfretwell, flo_norris_showjumping

landonorris happy birthday little max

→ yourusername your the worst

yourbsfusername besties legal nowww

→ yourusername yayayaya

→ maxfretwell nononono

maxfretwell happy birthday little sis

→ yourusername thanks loser

flo_norris_showjumping YAYYY

→ yourusername YAYAYYAYAYAY

friend1 happy birthday

→ yourusername thank you

friend2 hope you had a fun birthday

→ yourusername i did thanks

--------------------------

Y/n sat watching the fire. Her family and Landos were having a bonfire and celebrating Y/ns seventeenth and Lando who was doing really well in his Formula 3 season.

She felt the bench she was sitting on dip and looked to see Lando sitting next to her. "So the big seventeen huh?"

Y/n sent him a warm smile, "Yeah actually, its funny though cause I don't feel older even though I am." She said.

"That's what happens, any big plans for the future." He asked her, staring at the fire. Y/n glanced at him confused for a bit, Lando never really was willing to have proper conversations with her if he could escape it.

"Um yeah actually. I signed a campaign with Louis Vuitton so next month I'm flying out to Paris." She said excitedly, a fond smile crossed Landos face.

"Thats great Y/n, I'm really happy for you." He said, giving her a small nudge which she giggled at.

"How are you holding up Lan." He rolled his eyes slightly at the nickname, it had been something that she had never stopped calling him, despite his protests against him.

"Um alright, everything is going so well at the moment, but I'm kinda scared I guess, like I'm worried its all gonna go wrong and I'm gonna fuck everything up." He said, slightly shaky, Y/n turned to look at him and that was the first time she truly saw him, she could see how broken and scared he was. She smiled.

"The last thing your gonna do is fuck this up Lando, this is your dream, this is what your good at. I know you well enough to know that your not gonna fuck it up." She said, seriously and wholeheartedly which mad Lando believe her.

It was silent for a moment and then Lando spoke up, "Thank you."

"Always Lan."

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2018

yourusername has posted

liked by landonorris, yourbsfusername and 25, 678 others

yourusername sometimes you need a little break

tagged: landonorris, maxfretwell, flo_norris_showjumping

landonorris no pic creds????

→ yourusername SORRY guys ill just repost this because lando needs creds

→ user1 HELP SHES SO FUNNY

yourbsfusername miss you so much

→ yourusername I MISS YOU MOREE

flo_norris_showjumping y/ns everything and landos just there

→ yourusername don't speak to loudly hell hear you

→ landonorris HEY rude much

user2 whos the man

→ user3 Lando hes y/ns brothers best

----------------

It had been nearly a year since Y/n had last seen Lando, things had gotten busy with her modeling. The families had decided to go on a beach vacation together, forcing Y/n and Lando to spend the next two weeks together.

Flo had decided that the four of them should go clubbing together, a group catch up or something like that. After not seeing her brother and one of her best friends for so long it was necessary.

"Drink up Y/n." Flo said, passing a shot to her. Y/n downed the shot quickly scrunching her nose slightly.

"Slow down there sis." Max said whilst Lando bit back a grin, snorting slightly.

A while later Max had left the booth to go dance with his girlfriend whilst Flo had wondered off to get more shots. "Hey Lan." Y/n said giggling drunkly, Lando smiled back at her.

"You might wanna slow down on the drinks there Little max." Lando said, acting nonchalant but eyeing the drink in her hand.

"Oh come off it Lan, were here to have fun." She said raising her eyebrows slightly before downing the whole drink in front of him, acting as if it were a competition.

His face changed, into awe and an expression that she couldn't quite place. She smiled slightly before getting more serious, "Lan I-"

"Oh my god Lando?" They both turned to face the girl standing on the outside of the booth, Lando scooting away from her as if he had been burned.

"Alyssa what are you doing here?" Lando asked, shock taking over his face. Alyssa. Y/n felt the bile come up her throat, the burning hot jealousy. The pair started talking but she tuned out what they were saying until Lando turned to face her. She quickly fixed her expression into a smile when he faced her.

"Do you mind if I?" He paused, she shook her head. "No go ahead." She said, moving to leave the booth.

"Y/n you don't have to leave." She smiled, falsely and it was something Lando saw right through.

"Its fine really I just need to go to the toilet." She said, moving to leave again.

"Y/n, wait what were you going to ask me?" He asked her, she smiled at him, heart fluttering at the fact he was paying attention.

"Oh um- just if you wanted another drink." She said, lying through her teeth.

"I'm alright thanks." He said before turning to face Alyssa. Y/n headed straight to the bar, her plan to go to the toilets long forgotten.

"Two shots please." She asked, leaning against the bar.

"Rough night?" Y/n turned to look at a man standing next to her, he wasn't ugly in any sense, but definitely wasn't her type, he wasn't Lando.

She just smiled, muttering something under her breathe before turning back to the counter praying for the bar tender to hurry up.

"What's your name gorgeous." The guy asked, stepping closer, obviously not being very happy with the way he was being ignored. Before she could answer the bar tender came back and she quickly downed the two shots.

"Can I buy you a drink?" The guy asked, clearly annoyed at this point from the lack of response. She turned to him, about to tell him to fuck off when her eyes locked on something, Lando and the blonde. He was smiling at her, looking at her in a way Y/n could only dream of being looked at. She turned back around to face the man, unaware of the eyes that had clocked her and the guy. "Sure." She said with a forced smile and a shaky voice.

Once she had gotten a drink from the bar tender she moved with the guy onto the dance floor. As she danced Y/n noticed a pair of eyes staring daggers at the guy behind him, Lando. She decided to test the waters a little, grinding up against him. Her eyes clocked the way Landos grip tightened around his glass, knuckles going white. She smiled a little and drank the last of her drink. As she took a sip she noticed that she had begun to feel hazy, out of place.

She pulled away from the guy, "I'm gonna go to the bathroom." She slurred out, shaking the black spots from her vision.

She stumbled into the corridor when she felt someone's hand grab her and pin her against the wall. "What are you doing? Stop." She got out, trying to fight the urge to slip unconscious.

"Don't act like you didn't want it slut. The way you were acting, Grinding against me." Her wrapped his hand around her throat and placed sloppy, drunken kissed down it.

"Stop get off me." She said, to weak to push him off. He didn't.

She kept muttering at him to get off when someone ripped him off of her. She sunk to the floor, trying to pick up on her surrounds.

"Lando get off him you've already done enough damage." She heard someone say. Lando. Her eyes locked in on the head of curly brunette hair, punching the guy over and over again, rage present on his face.

"Lando." She called out to him, he stopped instantly throwing the guy down. Two hands came to cup her cheeks. "Y/n hey. Can you hear me." He asked her softly to which she nodded.

"Were going home alright, woah hey stake awake for me love." He said, grabbing onto her as she fought off the spots.

"Your okay." He muttered, more to reassure himself than her.

"Flo hey." Lando said, grabbing onto his sister who was dancing. The girl spun around, face dropping at the barely conscious girl Lando was gripping onto like a lifeline. "I need you to find Max now okay? I'm bringing her to the car."

She nodded and walked off, "I'm just gonna have one word with the bar tender okay? Then we can go home."

He walked over to the bar, "Hey were you the prick who served her." Lando asked one of the bar tenders who spun around to face her.

"I uh-"

"I suggest you keep a better eye out, my girlfriend got drugged because of you." Lando spat out, anger filling him. The bar tender nodded shakily, unsure of what else to do. Lando exchange a couple more heated words before heading over to the car.

His phone rung in his back pocket. "Hey Flo whats up?"

"I can't find Max, do you just wanna take Y/n back to the hotel and we can uber back." Flo said, worried for her friend.

"Okay sure." Lando said before chucking the phone in the back seat. Once he was sure that Y/n had gotten in the car safely he started driving back to the Hotel and Y/n blacked out.

"Y/n" Lando asked softly. "Y/n." He called out more loudly this time, no response. Shit, he muttered to himself, changing the route he was headed.

After sending a quick text to Flo, he sped up taking her to the hospital. When he carried her to the hospital a nurse immediately came over. "My girlfriend was drugged." Was all he could seem to say.

Y/n woke up to a beeping sound, the light was very bright when she opened her eyes. The nurse turned around to look at the girl, "Oh great your up, your boyfriend was very worried about you."

Y/n furrowed her eyebrows in confusion now picking up on the sleeping boy beside her. Once she had finished talking with the nurse she turned to look at the boy beside her.

"Lando." She said nudging him with no response. "Lan." She called out more and the boy shot up awake confused, he quickly got out of his daze when he saw the girl who was staring back at him.

"Y/n." He said, standing up and cupping her face. He stayed there for a moment, but then realised what was happening, where he was and stepped back awkwardly.

"Where's Flo and Max?" Y/n asked, trying to break the awkward tension.

"Oh, um back at the hotel, they needed to sober up and everything." Lando said.

"Oh right. And you stayed because?"

"I wanted to." He said quickly, much to his embarrassment.

"Right." She said, nodding slowly, causing a flush to run through his body.

"How are you?" He asked, clearing his throat, worry taking over his face.

"I'm fine." She said, brushing him off.

"Do you want to-"

"No Lando I'm fine." She said more sternly, causing an awkward tension to rise up in the room. After a moment she spoke up again, wanting to keep a lighthearted conversation with him since they barely talked.

"So girlfriend hey?"

"Fuck off."

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2019

yourusername has posted

liked by landonorris, yourbsfusername and 283, 686 others

yourusername couldn't be prouder of you landonorris i knew you could do it ✨🧡

tagged: landonorris

landonorris 🧡🧡

→ yourusername GO LANDO

→ user1 HELP shes too cute

maxfretwell Lando gets posted 3 times and i don't get 1 measly slide

→ yourusername sucks to suck

→ landonorris im juts better🤷

yourbsfusername GO ORANGE

→ yourusername actually its papaya

→ yourusername better fruit anyways

mclaren our fav papaya girl

→ yourusername my favourite papaya team

user2 EVERYONE SHUT UP!!! new y/lando lore just dropped

→ user3 no frfr they have to be a couple now just look at them

--------------------------

Y/n could hear the click of cameras following her as she headed towards the Mclaren garage. She had come to the Bahrain Grand Prix after missing Landos first due to scheduling conflicts.

"Y/n, its good to see you here." She heard a voice say and turned around to see her brother.

"Maxie." She screamed excitedly, jumping to wrap her arms around him, making him stumble back slightly.

"Easy there, how are you dove?" He asked his sister, pulling back to take her in.

"Pretty good, just exhausted." She said, rotating herself so could lean back against him and watch the track.

"Does Lando know your here?" He asked his sister, noting the familiar hue that still spread across her cheeks at the mention of the boy.

"No, I thought I'd surprise him." She responded, taking in the surroundings. Everything was so much bigger, a vast contrast to what she was used to watching Lando race at. She smiled slightly thinking about how far he had come.

"Hes gonna be really happy to see you, I'm really happy too see you." Y/n smiled up at her brother before looking at her watch.

"I'm gonna go surprise him now before things get to hectic." She said, patting her brothers arm before the siblings split off.

Y/ns eyes went everywhere, taking in her surroundings as she walked into the McLaren garage, eyes finding Lando instantly who was staring at something on his phone. She walked over to him, covering his eyes as she reached him.

"Guess who?" She whispered in the boys ear and he spun around immediately to face her.

"Y/n." He said excitedly, a huge smile spreading across his face as he took her in. Once he felt like he had fully looked over at her to make sure she was really there he pulled her into a tight huge. "What are you doing here?"

"Mf, thought I'd surprise you," She said her voice muffled in his chest, "I'm sorry I missed your first race."

Lando shook his head, "I don't care, as long as your hear now." He said, placing a small kiss on her head.

"Let the girl breathe Lando." Y/n heard someone with a thick accent say and the pair both turned to face Lando teammate, Carlos Sainz. "Carlos, pleasure to meet you." He said, sticking out his hand.

"Y/n." She said, shaking his hand, Landos arm draped protectively around her shoulders. A flicker of recognition crossed Carlos' face.

"Ah, So your the famous Y/n I've hear so much about."

"That would be me, all good things I hope." She said smiling.

"I don't think he could ever say bad things." Carlos said, giving Lando a pointed look. A confused look crossed her face for a second before she went back to smiling.

As she went to say something else someone called the two boys over. Carlos left but Lando lingered for a bit, "Stay here, please, I want to know you'll be here when I finish." He asked her, nearly begging.

"Of course." She said softly, up at him. A smile took over Landos face as he looked at her, quickly placing a kiss on his cheek and a quick goodbye as he was called for the fourteenth time.

"Y/n right?" She spun around to see a pretty girl looking at her, missing the way Carlos nudged Lando before whispering something to him.

"Yeah I am." The girl said blushing.

"I'm Isa, Carlos' girlfriend. Come sit, we can watch the race together."

The two girls sat together, watching the race and chatting although Y/n spent half the time forcing down her nerves. She watched in anticipation as the race came to a close, celebrating when Lando got sixth, his first points in Formula 1.

After everything came to a close, Lando came over to Y/n, wrapping her in a tight hug. She hugged him back tightly, disregarding how sweaty the boy was.

"I'm so so proud of you Lan, you did such a good job today." She said beaming from ear to ear, pulling back to look at him.

"Nothing without my good luck charm here." He said, making a rosy blush make its way across his cheeks.

--------------------------------

2020

yourusername has posted

liked by maxfretwell, yourbsfusername and 967, 394 others

yourusername conragulations lando 🎉

tagged: landonorris, lilymhe

lilymhe i MISSED you so much

→ yourusername stop i wanna see you again alreadyyyy

yourbsfusername GORGEOUS GIRL OML

→ yourusername STOP I LOVE YOU

maxfretwell missed you by one weeked

→ yourusername I'll BE HOME SOOON TRUST

user1 no lando interaction

user2 something feels off about this one tbh

user3 this seems so forced

user4 SHES LEGIT HIS GOODLUCK CHARM

----------------------------------------

Y/n and Lily walked towards the bar when she felt an arm wrap around her wrist, pulling her to the.

"What the - Carlos?" She asked, confusion and shock present on her face. "What are you doing."

"Your over Lando aren't you?" Carlos asked her making the girl stop and stutter.

"I- How did you- why?" The girl started and stopped, not sure what to say.

"Come with me, we should go find Isa or-" Carlos said, pulling her away from Lily.

"Carlos what's going on." She asked confused, turning around to look back at the Lily, and thats when she saw them.

A gorgeous brunette had her arm wrapped around Landos. She was slim, tall and had a gorgeous smile and made Y/n want to hide in a corner and cry. Its not like Y/n was jealous, she knew she was gorgeous, she was a model after all but this girl ha d something Y/n didn't, Lando. And he seemed infatuated with her.

Lando couldn't take his eyes off her, he was beaming. Y/n watched as the girl grabbed onto his arm, playfully swatting at his chest. Y/n felt like she had been stabbed over and over and Lando was just watching as she slowly bled out. "Oh."

"I'm so sorry, I knew he was talking to someone but I never thought it was serious enough for him to bring her to a race." Carlos said, pity laced in his voice. Y/n shook it off. "No, its fine, I'm fine. I guess I just didn't really think." She said.

She turned around and headed off in a random direction, Lily following behind her. It was at that moment Lando looked up, eyes finding the head of hair that was making its way further and further away and Carlos looking at him disappointedly before shaking his head and following after the two girls.

Lily was rubbing a comforting hand on her back when Carlos caught up with them. "Y/n." He said softly before engulfing her in a hug. She finally broke down, all those years of built up hurt and frustration caused by Lando was all let out.

"I just don't understand why he can't love me, whats wrong with me?" She sobbed, Carlos hugged her tighter.

"Nothing is wrong with you, Nothing Y/n. He's the one with the problem." Lily said so her. Carlos knew that when he had the chance he was going to rip into Lando.

"Why can't I just be happy?"

It had made one thing crystal clear, something that Lando had seemed to be repeating to her for years, he didn't want her. It was time to move on.

Landos first podium felt bittersweet, she gave him a small half hearted hug, but it had become obvious that it was over. This was the last moment for a long while that Y/n knew she would share with Lando, she needed space.

On her way out she accidently walked into to something, someone.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry."

"No its completely my fault, I should have been paying more attention." Someone said to her. She looked up to see a rather attractive man. She recognised him from around the track but they had never spoken before. "I'll buy you a new coffee." He said again.

"You don't have to but if your offering a doughnut with that I might just have to accept." She said to him.

"Of course, wouldn't want you to miss out on a free doughnut now would I." He said, matching her tone.

She smiled up at him, "Y/n Y/ln by the way." She said, sticking out her hand to him.

"I know - I mean nice to meet you, George Russell." The boy stuttered out, blushing slightly.

--------------------------------

2021

yourusername has posted

liked by landonorris, yourbsfusername and 1, 209, 394 others

yourusername nothing like monaco grand prix guys. so excited to be here and enjoy with those closest to me. ✨

tagged: maxfretwell, yourbsfusername, lilymhe, carlossainz55

maxfretwell always fun with my sister around

→ yourusername RARE!!!! max showing love to his sister

yourbsfusername BESTEST TIME WITH YOU

→ yourusername I KNOWW IT HAD LEGIT BEEN AGES

lilymhe STOP I MISSED YOU

→ yourusername agghffghhgfhfg

carlossainz55 my number 1 supporter

→ yourusername ferrari is legit my bae so...

mclaren 😢😢

→ yourusername IM SORRY

scuderiaferrari our favourite

→ mclaren back off she was ours first

user1 doesn't feel right without lando

user2 wheres lando

user3 i miss lando tbh

→ user4 so does everyone else in the comments tbh

user5 lando camping out in the likes frfr

user6 y/n here means a lando podium

→ user7 no cause shes his good luck charm fr

------------------------------------

It was the first time Y/n had been to a Grand Prix since Austrias Grand Prix the year before. Monaco was a big deal in the Formula 1 world and she knew it, the glamour, the elegance, it was one of her favourite races for a reason.

The day also marked the first race that she would go to since she started dating George. The pair had decided to keep their relationship lowkey and away from the public eye until they figured out how they wanted to function as a couple.

After meeting at the Austrian Grand Prix, Y/n and George had become good friends. Y/n trying to give herself sometime before jumping straight into a relationship. George was patient, he knew that there was history between Lando and Y/n but didn't push it. He took her out on picnic dates, would make dinner for her and was overall a loving a respectful boyfriend, never pushing her boundaries, he had been the perfect candidate for Y/n to move on.

The pair had gone long distance for a while because of busy schedules, but Y/n had made an effort to come to the first Grand Prix back.

Y/n had organised to meet at the Paddock Club with Lily and begun to make her way over when she bumped into someone.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry." She said, bending down to pick her stuff up. The person helped her and she felt a spark touching his hand as they both went to pick something up. "Lando." She said in recognition.

The boy tilted his head as he looked at the girl, "Y/n? What are you doing here?" He asked confusion laced in his tone. It didn't make sense, Max wasn't there and she only ever went if Max went.

"I came here to watch the race." She said curtly, shooting a small smile, the tone in her voice sounding as though she was saying 'duh.' She began to walk away from him. Lando chased after her confused, grabbing at her arm to make her stop walking and face him.

"Yeah but like why, you never come if Max isn't, you don't like being in the garage alone." She rolled her eyes. Lando felt his heart clench in his chest, why was she acting like this.

"Have you stopped to think maybe I won't be alone, maybe I'm not here for you Lando." She said and Lando felt as if Y/n had personally stabbed him herself. He had never experienced this side before.

Y/n forced herself to look at his face, trying to distract herself from how hot he looked, and how hurt he looked. Lando opened his mouth to say something but a voice called over from the side.

"Y/n." They both turned to see George. He came over and planted a kiss on her cheek, wrapping an arm around her wait. Lando tensed up immediately. "Hey baby." She said, leaning into him slightly, although she felt very tense.

"Lando." George said, nodding towards the man. Lando ignored him, eyes focused on the arm wrapped around her waist, heart hammering in his chest and blood pumping in his ears. When he noticed the look that Y/n had given him he responded to George, venom laced in his tone. George didn't notice but he did sense the awkward tension.

"So you guys are-"

"Dating, its pretty new though." Y/n cut him off, wrapping her hand around Georges which was sitting on her waist. "We very happy."

Lando could pick up on her tone, one telling him to leave them alone. He excused himself, coming up with some bullshit reason to get away. Once he had gotten far enough away Lando turned to watch Y/n and George, she hugged him tightly and placed a kiss to his cheek before walking off.

Lando felt sick. That should be him. He hated George. He hated himself. He didn't understand why he was feeling like this, maybe he always had. He just knew if he cared for Y/n the way he claimed, his heart wouldn't be hurting so much to see her and George together.

Carlos watched the whole interaction painfully. Lando had been in love with her for a while now and Carlos knew it, but Lando had never admitted it. From day one Lando talked about Y/n. How she was caring, kind, one of Landos best friend. He liked her in a platonic way he argued, he just admired how she would always stop to pat random pets, would bring him food after each race, could tell when he was upset. He even admired the way she would bite off the heads of gummy snakes so they wouldn't feel the pain. After Lando had spotted her at the last grand prix he broke it off with his girlfriend. He had argued that it had nothing to do with her he just didn't feel the same way about his girlfriend anymore.

Lando should be relieved that Y/n had moved on, its what he wanted for years. So why did he feel so uneasy about the whole situation?

-----------------------------

2022

yourusername has posted

liked by georgerussell, yourbsfusername and 1, 586, 986 others

yourusername brazil with my fav

tagged: georgerussell

georgerussell 💙

→ yourusername IM SO PROUD OF YOU

yourbsfusername your so sexy ml

→ yourusername I LOVE YOUUUU

francisca.cgomes my fav

→ yourusername STOP ILY SO MUCH

lilymhe CUTIE

→ yourusername YOUR A CUTIE

mercedesamgf1 OUR FAV

→ yourusername stopppppp

user1 missing the y/lando content so much

→ user2 grow up shes moved on

user3 idk something just feels wrong

user4 anyone find it so interesting that the two races Y/n came to was Landos only podium and a dnf

→ user5 NO FRFR SHE AFFECTS HOW HE DRIVES I STG

---------------------

Y/n wasn't a hundred percent sure how she had ended up there. It was Christmas time and she had brought George home with her. Her family and Landos were doing there annual Christmas celebration and somehow Lando and George both had to be there.

Lando was unable to keep his eyes off of her the whole night, it was getting creepy and he knew it. Max had also noticed Landos borderline creepy staring. Lando had been rotating between pouting like a toddler and not subtle staring through the whole night and Max was sick of it.

"Come grab a beer with me." Max said standing up off the couch.

"What-" Lando started but Max forcibly grabbed him up, pulling him into the kitchen.

"You need to stop Lando, I'm sick of it. You either like my sister or you don't. She's happy and I don't want you ruining it." Max said in a threatening tone.

"What are you - How?" Lando stuttered.

"Its obvious." Max sighed, "Just answer me this and I'll be on your side."

"What is it?"

"Do you love her?" Before Lando could answer Max's question the girl in question walked in. Lando felt his heart jump, she looked gorgeous as ever.

"Interrupting boy time?" She asked teasingly, moving past them to pour herself a champagne.

"No, just grabbing a beer." Max said uncomfortably.

She nodded, "I see how it is." She said, heading back into the living room.

Lando turned back to face Max once she left, not giving Max a chance to speak before speaking up, "I'm so in love with her it hurts me. I need her more than the air I breathe, I need her more than the moon needs the sun. She's everything."

Max nodded, engulfing Lando in a tight hug, the boy bursting into tears. He wasn't a hundred percent sure why, but he was.

Y/n was frozen in her place in the door frame, there it was, the words she wanted to hear her whole life. It wasn't fucking fair. She left with George pretty soon after, making some excuse about not feeling well when really she couldn't be in the same vicinity as Lando.

She was done, she had decided. She was fucking done with Lando Norris.

-------------------------

2023

yourusername has posted

liked by yourbsfusername, maxfretwell and 1, 384, 734 others

yourusername life out and about

tagged: yourbsfusername, friend1, friend2

friend1 last night was WILD

→ yourusername not worth the hangover

yourbsfusername never again

→ yourusername NEVER I SAY

maxfretwell are you coming home soon???

→ yourusername if i have time

fransica.cgomes missing my baby

→ yourusername i miss you too

lilymhe HOT

→ yourusername HOTHOTHOT

user1 sorry but shes spiraling

user2 i miss the old y/n era

→ user3 nah this era is the best era

user4 LANDOS IN SINGAPORE ASWELL

-------------------------------

Y/n had lost track of how many drinks she'd had at this point. She was in Singapore for a modelling event, conveniently Lando was in Singapore for the Singapore Grand Prix.

She had convinced the other girls to go drinking with her, needing to get Lando out of her mind. She was spiraling and she knew it. Ever since Landos confession the year prior she had completely gone out of control. Her and George had a messy break up, not for the lack of trying from George to make things work out. He had finally called it quits when she cheated on him during one of her many drunken escapades.

He wasn't certain but George was pretty sure her completely 180 had something to do with Lando, after that Christmas she had started acting weird. After her breakup with George Y/n completely lost it, going out every night, a million different hookups, everyone close to her knew she was out of control.

They wanted to help but they didn't know how. She didn't listen no matter how much they tried to shut it down. They all just wanted her to get better, to feel better. This lead them to hear, at a random club in Singapore. With much reluctance she finally convinced her friends to go out with her.

Y/n swung her hips to the beat, leaning against some random guy. He was her prey for the night she had decided. She turned around to face him. "I'll be right back." She whispered in his ear, heading over to the bar, aware of his stare on her ass as she walked away.

"Another shot." She said the bartender when someone slide next to her.

"Can I get a whiskey please." A familiar gravely voice asked. It couldn't be. The girl turned to look at the guy standing next to her. Lando.

The boy felt someone's gaze on him and shot a glance to the side before double backing. "Y/n." He whispered her name out like a prayer, like something had saved him.

"Norris." She sent him a tight lipped smile. Lando could hear his heart shatter, the indifference was killing him.

"What are you doing hear." He asked her.

"Just a modelling gig. Thank you." She said to the bar tender before taking the shot, making Landos eyebrows raise in surprise. "Look I have to go but it was great seeing you."

Somehow Lando could tell that it was insensire.

Y/n had felt Landos eyes on her all night, she basked in it but also hated in. It was so conflicting. She had bumped into Carlos one her way back to the dancefloor and they had talked for a little while.

The dudes hands started to explore her body, running up her chest to cup at her boobs. She embraced the feeling, imagining it was Lando instead. The guy began to kiss down her neck and she lifted her hand to grab at his hair when all of a sudden he was pulled away.

"What the fuck." She turned around to see Lando holding the guy and yelling in his face. "Lando what are you doing." He ignored her. The dude pushed Lando off him.

"Fuck this shit, this pussy isn't worth it." The dude said, Lando went to chase after him but she held him back.

"What is your problem Norris." She yelled at him in his face, not caring who was watching.

"What's my problem? Whats your problem Y/n. And can you stop with the Norris, what happened to Lan or even Lando? When did you start hating me." He said, emotion thick in his voice.

"Hate you? I don't hate you I just really fucking sick of being treated like shit. I loved you Lando, and you just lead me on for years. I got sick of it, of you never doing anything." She screamed at him, Lando deflated slightly.

"Loved?" He asked her. She rolled her eyes, stepping away from him.

"I'm done listening to this bullshit." She said, walking off, he pulled her back to him.

"You still love me. I know you do." He said, taking step closer.

"No I don't, I don't want you anymore Lando." She said, her resolve crumbling.

"If you didn't you wouldn't have been dancing with some other guy, trying to make me jealous." He said, pausing slightly. "Tell me, were you imaging my hands instead of his, wishing it was me." He whispered, Y/n felt a flush break over her because it was true, she felt like she had been caught red handed.

"Come on, baby, you miss me, I know you do." He said, pulling her chin up lips closing in on hers.

Y/n was in a daze, breathing in the familiar smell of his cologne after so long without him. All of a sudden she felt herself get pulled out of the trance she was in. She pushed him off, Landos gaze filtered in confusion.

"You know what I'm so done with you. Of course you want me now, I'm trying to get over you Lando, I need to get over you." She said, her voice breaking a little. He wanted to grab her, hold her, apologise.

"What if I don't want you to." He said.

She completely stepped back, tears in her eyes.

"Fuck you Lando Norris."

-----------------------------

a/n: tbh did not spell check this so it might be completly shit also tell me why it took me a whole week to write this and also ignore if timeline is completely wrong - 8K words which is insane

[lvdr-haze]

hii, can you write joost x female reader angst? they argue, he yells/says mean stuff but it ends with fluff? thank youuu 💋💋

here you go love, sorry for the late btw. :))

TW!! : mention of the death of a friend, angst with comfort ending

words : ≈1000

english is not my first language sorry if you can find some mistakes in the ff.

everything is fictional !!

REQUESTS STILL OPEN!!

NEVER FELT SO ALONE

Lately, Joost and you had been distant because he had a lot of work, and you knew that he didn’t like being disturbed while working, and you respected that.

But today was different. As you were walking home from work after an already bad and long day, you received a call from an unknown number. You usually don’t respond, but this time you felt the urge to pick up the call; you didn’t know why.

When the person on the other end of the telephone line announced the death of one of your dearest friends, your body just stopped moving, your eyes immediately filled with tears, and you felt quite dizzy.

You couldn’t believe it. How was it even possible?

You couldn’t even talk to the person who had called you, your body just moving from your sobs and your hands trembling.

The call ended and you stayed there, incapable of moving, just trembling and sobbing, trying so hard not to fall to your knees. You needed someone to hold you right now, and that someone needed to be Joost. You didn’t want anyone else because you knew that he would exactly understand how you were feeling right now.

You walked home with tears still rolling down your eyes, and after what seemed like an eternity, you finally entered your apartment.

You knew Joost was still working on his song in the room he had transformed into a studio, but you had to see him and you had to feel his arms around you.

You entered the room, but sadly for you, that clearly wasn’t the moment to do that because your boyfriend was so angry. He had just lost one of his songs and couldn’t find it anywhere on his laptop. So when he heard the door opening and felt your presence, he immediately yelled without even looking or checking on you.

“FOR FUCK’S SAKE, Y/N!! Just fucking leave me alone. Why are you pissing me off like this? Stop acting like a fucking child.”

His words were harsh, cold, and hurtful, but you didn’t want to fight. You didn’t have the energy for it. So you just stepped out of the room, crying even more.

You’d never felt so alone in your life.

You hated when people yelled at you, and Joost knew that. So after a little while, he came out of his room just to find you crying really hard on the couch. You couldn’t stop yourself, and your body was aching from sobbing. Joost immediately ran to you and took you in his arms to hold you tightly. He could feel that something else had happened, so he gently said with his calm and deep voice:

“What’s going on, lieverd? You can tell me everything… everything’s okay now…”

You looked at him; he was so comforting at the moment but yet really scary after how he had yelled at you five minutes before.

Joost could see the fear in your eyes, and that broke his heart. He never wanted you to be scared of him, so he held you as long as you needed to open up to him. And you finally did. You explained everything—the bad day at work, the call, the announcement of the death of your friend, the fight you had with him, and how you were feeling so lonely right now.

Joost’s heart ached at the mention of your dead friend. He had lost several people when he was young, and he knew how much it hurts and how hard it is to accept.

He sighed and played with your hair before finally speaking up:

“First of all, I’m really sorry that I reacted like this. I didn’t mean to, and I don’t ever want you to be scared of me. For your friend, you know I understand you perfectly, but the only advice I can give you is to let time do its work. Maybe it will take a while for you to heal, but I’ll be there to support you even when it’s not easy. You are not alone, Y/N… you’ll never be alone as long as I’m with you…”

Your sobbing had calmed down and your head was now resting on Joost’s chest, listening to his heartbeat as he was speaking to you with all the tenderness in the world.

Your eyes were feeling heavy and your body just needed some rest right now.

“Thank you, Joost… I love you…”

Joost kissed your forehead and smiled at the sight of you falling asleep on his torso.

“I love you too, Y/N… I love you so fucking much…”

[inkdemonapologist]

Way back before we got the BatDR trailer I had this wild theory -- basically, that the reason they couldn't show any concept art/trailers/etc was that BatDR was gonna pull a wizard of oz and suddenly be in colour partway through. So then that's why we were getting teasers like "look, its a model of A SHELF," because all the actual interesting stuff would've obviously been in colour and spoiled the surprise.

Part of the reason I thought this would work really well was that I assumed Nathan's acquisition of the Bendy IP and "revival" of the franchise in-world would be thematically relevant, rather than just... an excuse to have a second game. Like, Bendy is in new hands now, the cartoons are essentially being rebooted, and there's a LOT of thematic potential in that concept of Old vs New or the good and bad aspects of Change, and the idea that reviving Bendy in the real world would impact the ink realm was a fascinating concept to me. Now that we know the main thrust of the story........... actually I still think this could've worked with it? The sepia-toned Memory of Joey's Regret and the evil of the Ink Demon lingers over the studio and corrupts this new colourful world, while Wilson, the Man Who Killed The Ink Demon, is the one trying to forcibly extinguish these old stains and make the machine useful again.

Geez, you could tie Wilson's motivation in pretty directly actually if you dropped the ENTIRE thing where he says he's trying to BETTER THE WORLD THRU THE POWER OF THE MACHINE or whatever and instead just make him an actual janitor whose dad just gave him this bottom-tier job at his company. Give Nathan one audiolog about how his son is neglectful at work and its hard to find a job he can actually do or some such, and then you have Wilson as someone desperate to prove he deserves more. He sees his father's idolisation of Joey is naive, is able to realise the memory of Joey may be literally corrupting the business through the machine, and wants to eradicate that -- including Audrey, the most subtle infiltration of Joey Drew's influence. He's essentially the force of the New applied with no respect for the Old -- and then you could still give Wilson ties to that psychedelic neon ink from the Shipahoy battle; in fact, you could probably lean into it more: colour taken to the extreme, colour taken too far, something just as destructive as Joey's monochrome obsession.

(I've always loved the idea that Wilson isn't actually an artist and just stole the Shipahoy design while janitoring, which works great with the Shipahoy Monstrosity at the end being part crab because he couldn't actually create an isolated model to feed the machine... in this current era of The Threat Of AI Generation, the idea of wilson introducing a lot of mechanical innovation and incompetently dumping artwork into the machine to make new, too-colourful horrors in the interest of impressing his father while destroying all the old things these cartoons were first built on feels apropos lmao. obviously AI wasn't a huge talking point while BatDR was in production, but "ppl who assume more technology automatically makes art better while inadvertently destroying its heart" is extremely not new)

So the ink realm could be partially in colour (a world changed by the new cartoons), partially sepia (the infected memories of the old studio), and partially glowy neon (wilson's overzealous renovation). It'd be neat if Audrey became a bit of both -- partially colour, partially sepia -- and represented the new cartoons' ties to the old. Learning about the horrors that befell her father's old studio and the Gent technology that Wilson is now using are both relevant -- Joey's exploitation of actual artists who care was bad, and so is Wilson's complete disregard for the heart of these artists' work. The memory of Joey can't fix it because he is part of the problem -- he and the demon are the source of the monochrome infection -- so you have to be the one to bring heartfelt colour into this world, a power none of the others have; find a way to heal those trapped by old wrongs and restart the cycle in a better direction. Then, when Audrey says she wants to create a kinder cycle at the end, we have an idea of what that means and that she can do it b/c there's simple symbolism associated with it -- the new, colourful world that's neither corrupted by festering wrongs nor torn apart by Wilson's machines.

anyway. thats my half-baked idea. i still think its a shame that there WAS colour in there for like 2 seconds and they did NOTHING WITH IT!!!!

[rahuratna]

Nanami Kento: Relationship Headcanons (now a fic), Part 4

Contents: pre-relationship headcanons, slow burn, pining, humour

The day after receiving the honey cakes, you felt slightly nervous at the prospect of meeting Nanami in the break room. You knew, however, that you could easily avoid the encounter.

Except, you didn't want to. There was a delicate balance to be maintained here, a dance of two birds hovering around the same flower and never alighting. If you didn't meet him as usual, you knew that a silent message would be sent, and received accordingly on his part. At the same time, your presence in the break room was a message on its own.

Shaking your head to clear it of these thoughts, you wondered for a minute if infatuation (you didn't want to use other terms for this feeling that you might regret later) really had to be this complicated. You didn't have time to think on it further, because the door to the room opened and the subject of your fixation stood right in front of you.

You couldn't be entirely certain, but Nanami seemed relieved to see you there. He took off his glasses and approached your table with his usual quiet greeting, which you returned. You decided to throw caution to the wind and take the initiative.

"Thank you for the cakes."

"No need. They were meant as a thanks to you for helping Yuuji," he countered smoothly, opening up his bought lunch and preparing his chopsticks.

You paused, wondering how to query after what you'd been wondering, but Nanami was back to his tricks of reading your mind. Just as you opened your mouth, he placed his folded napkin neatly to one side and said, "I've noticed you going to that bakery often. I also appreciate good quality food and have purchased their savoury range before."

You brightened immediately upon hearing that.

"Oh! Then did you try their focaccia? And the cheese and garlic bread?"

"Naturally. I'm particularly fond of the focaccia. The herb blend they use is quite splendid."

You clapped your hands together and leaned forward, all nervousness about this encounter now forgotten.

"But then, you must have tried the brie and bacon ciabatta at the place down the road, right?"

"Yes. The rocket leaves are a nice touch. They give a certain freshness and bite to what could be a heavy sandwich."

"Exactly! And the tomato tart is to die for!"

"Oh? I confess, I haven't tried that yet. Perhaps next time."

"And pair it with their French coffee. Great combination."

He took a bite of his lunch and chewed, carefully and contemplatively, as he did all things. He placed his chopsticks across the top of the container, then turned his entire body to face you, those earnest hazel eyes unflinching in their regard.

"I'm not very familiar with the menu of that place, though. Perhaps you could accompany me, to provide a few recommendations?"

You didn't have enough time to process the query. For once, your mind would not allow you to hesitate as you beamed at him and nodded.

"I'd be happy to! Let me know when you'd like to go."

"Of course."

It was only when your lunch break was over, when he'd bowed his head in a respectful greeting and left, that you realised just how rapidly your heart was beating and how your hands were experiencing small tremors, as if some mischievous sprite of the air had taken up residence there.

It felt a little like diving into the ocean, from the top of a cliff. The water may receive you, hard and turbulent at first, and then cradle you, allowing you to open your eyes and see the wonders that lay beneath. Or a treacherous rock could break your fall. Permanently.

It wasn't as if you didn't see the direction this was heading. It was the nature of the world you inhabited that made this so potentially damaging. He must know it too, so why ... But something was stopping you from going beyond that point in your thoughts. Was it intuition? Was it some innate instinct for doing what you should? Or was it plain illusion, a blindfold of obtuseness and stupidity that had somehow descended over the both of you?

Nanami sends you a message two days later, informing you that he had some time off after his morning mission and that he would like to visit the bakery, if that was fine.

Before you are able to stop yourself, to hesitate, to really think about what you are doing, you type 'Yes, perfect' and forward it to him.

You are beginning to realise that however you spin it, your answer will always be yes. Yes, yes, yes, a hundred times over. Consequences be damned.

When you finish your shift, you receive a message, punctual to the minute.

"I am waiting in the garden."

You glance into the small hand mirror you carry in your bag, brush fingers through your hair and pause before touching up your lipstick. As observant as he is, Nanami wouldn't miss something like that. A treacherous little part of your mind whispers to you, "Good. Let him."

Slamming the mirror shut, you head out, past the fairly empty rooms, through the corridors and out into the afternoon sunshine. Nanami is waiting exactly where he said he would be. His hair gleams like the glaze on those honey cakes in the buttery light of your office lamp. As you approach him, you're struck by how tall he seems, now that you're not seated at a table together.

He turns to you and offers a soft greeting. You both pause, and it seems that even Nanami is sometimes at a loss as to what course of action to take. You assert a winning smile and adjust your bag on your shoulder.

"Let's go and pick up some tarts, then."

Nanami's mouth twitches slightly.

"Oh ... I mean the tomato tarts, of course."

You can feel that tell-tale heat rising in your neck again. God, what a sentence to utter.

"I'm not sure what other tart you could mean. Let's go."

Your embarrassment turns to good humour as he turns and leads the way, his pace unhurried. He starts to point out changes on the campus that have been made since he returned to work here, some of which even you hadn't noticed, what with the blinker-vision that your job induced.

"Hmm. Those statues. They came up just last year."

"I remember. Had to call a whole crew in to install them correctly."

"What do you think about them?"

"Well, to be honest, I thought they were a little pretentious."

Nanami is silent for a minute and you glance at him curiously.

"Why? Do you like them?"

He can barely conceal the smugness in his tone when he says, "No. They were Gojo's idea."

You laugh and whatever tension or uneasiness there had been between the two of you evaporates. As you head slowly for the main entrance, Nanami types something on his phone and soon after, a black sedan, one you recognize as a Jujutsu Tech vehicle, draws up beside the two of you. Nanami instructs the driver to take you both into the nearby town where the bakery you frequent is located.

When you have been dropped off at a street corner some distance from the cafe, Nanami glances at you with a trace of uncertainty.

"I thought it would be nice weather to walk for a while. If you don't want to, then we can call for the car again."

"Of course I want to. You're right. It's a beautiful day."

You continue your stroll with him, suddenly hyper aware of his arm brushing against yours gently, the way he was deliberately keeping pace with your stride, the distinct masculine scent of him that was always evident when you were close together. You look down at his hands, the broad, elegant fingers calloused slightly at the inner curve, where they would drag against the hilt of his weapon. You wondered how they would feel under your own exploring digits.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks, softly.

You. Always.

"When did you decide that your weapon was the most suitable one?"

"Hmm."

His gaze is on you now, intent. You meet it, them allow your eyes to travel down to his hands. You've broken many vows already, but this new one, to be more open about what you think and feel, seems to be one you can adhere to.

Nanami follows your gaze and then lifts one hand, palm up, so that you can see more clearly.

"I assume you're wondering how it feels to wield a blade?"

"A little, yes."

"When we trained as sorcerers, they asked us to try out different weapons, become proficient at a few and then narrow it down to those we felt most comfortable with. I tried polearms, axes, swords, bludgeons. I found that I liked the weight of the heavy weapons, but also the precision of the blade. I told this to... a friend of mine. He went digging through the whole shed looking for something that suited me. I told him to drop it, that what I was looking for was unlikely to exist among cursed tools."

"But he kept looking, I assume?"

"He did, indeed. Day after day. He'd go looking after every training session, until even I became sick of asking him to stop. He was ... persistent like that. Haibara."

He says the name as if exhaling a weighted breath. You decide that the heaviness it bears must be pain. You think you can guess what had happened to Haibara.

"So he found your current weapon?"

"Not quite. He found an old knife, the type used to cut through dense bushes and branches. He said it felt right. I took it from him and ... he was right. It felt good in my hand. Balanced. I showed it to our teacher at the time and they had one designed for me, to the specifications I described."

He turns to you, and although the lines at the corners of his mouth seem a little deeper, his expression is more open.

"Does that answer your question?"

"It does. And I have another."

"Well, it's going to have to wait until you answer mine."

"Oh?"

"Are you in the habit of picking up tarts?"

"Nanami!"

"Pardon me. Then I'll ask something a little less personal. What is it about crosswords that you like so much?"

"Hmm. I suppose ... because I never used to be good at them."

"You weren't?"

"I was hopeless, actually," you laugh, "But I did love the challenge. I've always been good with languages. Eventually they became second nature to me."

"I see. It has to do with your stubborn streak, then?"

You splutter a little.

"What do you mean stubborn streak, as if it's a habit?"

"So you admit it, then."

"I - all right. Yes. But you're not telling me much about - "

"I overhead you talking to someone in the supply department once. You asked for a type of cubicle for the students' classrooms and they didn't make those. You drew something that looked like a beehive and sent it to him by email."

"Is there something wrong with shelving that looks like a beehive?"

"The craftsman certainly thought so, until you wore him down through sheer persistence."

"At least I'm consistently annoying."

"I don't find you annoying at all."

Your smile belies the pleasant frisson those words send through you. Honestly, your standards shouldn't be so embarrassingly low.

"Oh really? Maybe that's a character flaw, then."

He glances over and another small smile toys at the corner of his mouth.

"Possibly. I am known to possess a very high tolerance for certain persons."

By the time you reach the bakery, Nanami's speech is already less formal than you're accustomed to. He has loosened his tie slightly and his arms swing with greater freedom as he walks. He looks like he's actually having a good time and you know that you probably look much the same. It's almost too easy, this quiet camaraderie, the flow from one topic to another, the humour that bites and leaves such a teasing, pleasant sting in its wake.

You never thought it would be like this, but now you're perusing the menu, and you push that thought aside. Nanami has found you the perfect seats in a small private corner of the cafe, where you can see the street clearly, but are shielded from the view of those coming in through the main entrance. Nanami had pulled out your chair for you before seating himself and the sun's warmth is comforting against your back.

"Have you decided?" he asks, after a short while. 

"I think I'm going to try the camembert toast with fig preserve and honey."

"Feeling for something sweet, then?"

"Today, yes. What about you?"

"I'll try that tart."

You struggle to keep a straight face and Nanami eyes you slyly over the top of his menu. Clearing your throat, you continue.

"I'm glad you're taking my recommendation."

"I see it has goat's cheese. Quite the complement. I do trust you in matters of food."

"Are there matters with which you don't trust me?"

He folds the menu away and regards you seriously.

"I wouldn't trust you in matters of dancing."

You stare at him. For someone so unassuming, this man really had a penchant for stating the unexpected.

"Dancing?"

"I've noticed you trip on the corner of your desk more than a few times."

"Oh God." You cover your face, mortified. "Really? Is there anything you don't notice?"

"Little escapes me."

The waitress arrives and saves you from his merciless analysis of your clumsy nature. She takes your orders and there is a small lull in the conversation as you wait for your drinks. You take the time to examine him, and he you. There is something intimate, but relaxing about this, the way your eyes can openly take each other in now. He seems to hesitate before asking you his next question.

"Do you like this kind of thing?"

"Eating at cafes?"

"Exploring new places to eat in general."

"Oh, yes. I do it quite often by myself."

The unspoken question was answered and Nanami's expression was suddenly closed and vulnerable. He looked away from you, out into the street. His next words were considered and quiet.

"I eat out with my colleagues sometimes. After a job."

Your hands clutch the menu a little too tightly, crinkling the corners.

"You mean, like this?"

He looks you in the eye, and what you see there both exhilarates and terrifies you. There is a softly burning fire there, a quiet longing, a wound that has been picked open many times by uncontrolled fingers. His answer sounds clear, even amongst the noises of chatter, dishes clanking and the hiss of the coffee machines.

"No. Not like this."

@tsukimefuku @g-kleran @actuallysaiyan @kentocalls

[alpydk]

Writing Prompt! (No pressure) -

Tav and Gale move into his tower after the fight, Tav is a druid who feels out of place - Gale makes the tower feel more like home for them.

Finding Balance

Thank you for another beautiful prompt that again got a way from me. Word count - 1939 - Angst/Comfort - M/M

Gale had noticed how distant Tav had become over the recent weeks. What should have been a honeymoon period of days nestled in the comfort of warm cotton sheets, bodies entwined in ecstasy were instead being met with moments of hands being tentatively pulled away, of distant gazes from the balcony over the extending seas.

Waterdeep, the city of splendours, was the wizard’s home. He loved the bustling streets, the worn cobbles that shone with the fresh autumn rains, the lines of shop windows he could peruse on quieter days. There had been so many aspects of the area he’d wanted to show Tav, and yet all had been met with the same indifference as the tower. He’d cook the druid’s favourite meals, rub scented oils into the muscular shoulders, tense from adventuring, from conversations avoided and yet Tav still seemed to pull further away, and Gale was losing hope.

He’d, of course, tried communicating with Tav about the problem, his stoic friend, providing little in the ways of feedback as to what the matter was, and so despite the inner turmoil he was feeling, he let his friend leave. Days the druid would be gone from home, coming back dirt covered and bruised, choosing to sleep on the hard wooden floor rather than under the soft blankets Gale had provided. He conjured stars on the balcony, read sonnets of his love, wooed Tav, and in those moments they were together again, only to part as the stars faded, night becoming day. His moon Tav, vanishing with the light of the morning dawn. He knew he needed to trust his love, needed to respect their boundaries, that in the end they were two different people who had their own ways of living, and yet he felt lonely, desperately alone in the confines of his beloved tower.

The rains poured from the slate tiles above the balcony; the thunder rumbling in the distance from the flashes of lightning. Gale had longed to spend days like this; wrapped in the embrace of Tav, a book shared between them and the safety of one another’s hold, acting as a protective shield from the storm. But there was no Tav, no embrace. There were only the icy winds whipping the pages of the tome with little regard for his wanting hands. It was at this moment he went against his unwritten code and cast the scrying spell, peering at the druid without their knowledge.

---

Tav sat in the forest clearing, his hands absentmindedly stroking the head of a white wolf that dozed next to him. The rains had not reached this part of the lands yet, but even if they did, the druid knew they would only bring new life out into the woods. Rabbits and birds would become the frogs and earthworms. The gentle breeze in the trees would become the pitter-patter of raindrops on the leaves. Prickling blades of grass would turn to soft moss under his boots and each step would be another of a freedom he felt he was losing.

He loved Gale, that much he was sure of, but Waterdeep, the cracked stones of the packed roads, the soulless windows he’d seen his own reflection in. That he did not love. Gale’s tower, which had been spoken of fondly in the past, was more of a stone prison, its large open windows taunting him with the world he wished to be a part of. The bed was too soft, the meals too exquisite; the sonnets he’d once loved now brought him guilt. He wanted to be honest with Gale, to tell him everything, and yet he instead pushed away the only person who’d ever grown close to him. Tav knew the wizard had been away from home for so long, had nearly lost everything at the orders of Mystra, and so this was the sacrifice to be made. Nature would have to come second, Waterdeep first. Freedom lost.  

He felt the sensation of being watched, lifting his head and glancing around the clearing. The wolf tensed next to him, and he heard the distant rumble of thunder that came with the storm. His eyes were sharp, years of hunting in difficult conditions giving him the advantages he needed to spot both prey and predator and with them he saw the scrying sensor hovering by the treeline. He didn’t need to approach it; he knew immediately who was watching him from the comfort of their sky bound throne. It was Gale, his love, his warden.

---

It was some time later before Gale heard the oak door of the tower creek open and Tav enter, a heavy thud against the wall as the leather boots hit it with force. As the druid had spotted the sensor, Gale had been quick to dispel it, his heart pounding in his chest, guilt clutching his throat tightly. He’d been overbearing in his search for answers, in his attempts to save the marriage that may have been doomed before it had even began. He listened for the footsteps, sipping his tea in a hope it would steady the rising nerves.

Tav entered the room, his jaw tight, his hands clenching and unclenching, as if trying to relieve the tension. The once warm eyes that Gale had longingly gazed into were now cold and glinting with the fires of a rage not seen since Baldur’s Gate. “You were spying on me.”

Gale swallowed deeply, his mind racing, trying to find the right words to diffuse the situation. He wanted to apologise, but he also wanted to unleash his own simmering anger at being ignored, at being pushed aside and abandoned. Just as Mystra had done… “I’m sorry, my love. You must understand, though, that I was merely concerned about you, what with the storm.”

Wind rattled the balcony door, the heavy rains now battering the tower; though Gale questioned which would be the worse storm to withstand, the one outside, or the building tempest within the walls.

“The storm?! Don’t give me that bullshit.” Tav threw off his leather overshirt, raindrops still travelling down the contours of his firm arms, and marched into the bathroom, his voice raised and intimidating. “As if it wasn’t enough to keep me holed up here. Now I must be monitored in the wilderness as well?”

Gale leaned forward, putting down the teacup and registering the complaints his companion spoke. He didn’t understand what was being accused of him. He could accept the fault for the spell, but anything else was lost to him. “I apologise for the spell. It was a failing on my part, but holed up? Is that truly how you feel here? With me?”  

Drying his hair, the druid left the bathroom, his shoulders no longer showing the glistening remnants of a previous life outside the walls. The few moments alone had given his temper time to calm, his blood flowing slower, his mind realising that this was the time to confess all if he was to reclaim any balance in this relationship. “I…” He took a seat on the floor at the foot of the bed, his weathered hands flat on the cool floorboards beneath him, the darkwood frame of the bed, a support for his arching back. “The city, the tower… it’s not my home.”

Lowering his head, Gale sighed. He’d suspected as much but hadn’t wanted to admit the truth, unwilling to give up his own home after so long away. He wanted to speak, wanted to find out what it was Tav needed, but he dreaded the answer that would come: that it was over between them, alone again.

The druid’s voice was quiet as he spoke, a softness that Gale had heard very little of during their adventure together. Tough was the persona that Tav had used so often, driving forward with determination until eventually returning to saying very little when resting in tranquil glades. “Gale… I want to be with you. I never doubt that. But here, in Waterdeep. I don’t think I can do it. Aside from you, there is nothing for me here. There is no nature, no life aside from that of the people that push and shove in the streets below. There’s no peace like that I find in the forests.”

The wizard nodded, a relief that at least he was not the primary issue in this scenario. He searched for solutions, thinking of past conversations with Halsin on the matter of nature versus humanity and the balance that needed to be found for them to truly exist together. “I could…” He hesitated, pondering the mechanics required for such a feat. Would it be enough to keep Tav with him? Would he be enough?

Tav looked over with curiosity in his eyes. He’d be open to try any solution at this point. All he wished was for them both to be happy, as they had been on their travels, as they had been during their night together under the stars at Moonrise, bodies flowing together on crisp conjured grass.

“It would take time and resources, but I could come up with something that would work for you. Would you be willing to let me attempt this feat for you?”

The druid nodded, his shoulders relaxing, and he gave a heavy sigh. “Ai armiel telere maenen hir.”

Gale heard the familiar words and smiled softly. He stood, approached his love, and knelt in front of him. His knees screamed at the position not felt in so many nights, but he cared not. He brought his hand to the chiselled jaw in front of him, his thumb running lightly over the bristles of unshaven hair. “And you mine, my sweet galanodel.”

---

Over the following months, the tower changed dramatically. Wildflowers bloomed on the balcony railings, blues and purples; their petals scattered on the sea breeze. On more than one occasion, Gale found his bookmark replaced with a leaf from a mighty oak or the feather of an unseen bird. Wild wines now wrapped around the bedposts, their forest green leaves casting dancing shadows under the candlelight. The smell of water lilies permeated through the musty tomes, and the sound of trickling water could be heard as the sounds of the city quietened with the descent of the warm sun.  

These were not the only changes that had been made. Gale’s desk had been moved, the large stone wall behind now left blank. Mystra’s statue had been placed in a shaded corner, no longer an unspoken altar, but a memory of a time long since passed. He would glance at the wall often during his studies, knowing what lay just beyond it. As evening would fall, the bright light would erupt into the room, the ever-present portal of his creation creating the balance needed.

Tav would often step from it with small gifts bundled into his arms. Sometimes it would be a selection of ingredients, Gale’s cooking now involving an additional element of research which he relished in. Flowers and herbs of various types as we well as interesting stones and crystals gathered were found too, which Tav knew the wizard would find interesting to read about.

The most treasured discovery, though, was that of a large branch which had been collected, and working together, the married pair had created a small piece of artwork. As the springtime sun had shone in from the balcony, the harbours waves licking upon the shore; they’d hung it from the rafters with an auburn ribbon, the knotted wood wrapped in dried orchids and the torn remnants of purple robes.

-------------------------------

"Ai armiel telere maenen hir." - You hold my heart forever.

"galanodel" - moon whisper

[amonsteronmaplestreet]

Have I ever told y’all about the strangest job I ever did?

“Oh, here we go,” you’re thinking. “Some fella in a seedy bar in New Alms is wanting to tell me about a job he did. I’ve been here before and I know what’s coming. Whatever the job was, I’d bet all the water in the bayou it was something illegal.”

And of course you’d be right to think that. This city ain’t exactly known for its upstanding citizenry. New Alms is the ass-end of civilization, perched on the southernmost tip of the Peninsula, out of sight and out of mind for respectable folks. It’d be easier to list the jobs here that aren’t illegal, I should think.

But don’t you worry. I ain’t here to spin some sordid tale of murder or kidnappings or anything of that nature. No, my friends, those sorts of jobs were never very much my style.

Jackson Balor’s the name, and I was sitting not far from here when a man came strutting through that very door, marched right up to me, and said: “I’ve heard tell that you’re the finest thief in the city.”

Well it was a mighty flattering thing for him to call me that, but truth is I couldn’t say for certain if I actually was the finest thief in the city or not. New Alms is a city of thieves, ain’t it? I could’ve been the finest one, sure, or there could’ve been thieves finer still, and besides my Granny—rest her soul—always did tell me to never be too prideful. “Lord Cerenis frowns on the prideful,” she used to say.

Still, this man who’d come up to me? He was dressed in these cheap clothes that were too clean to have been anything but a recent purchase, and he had on a hooded cloak that was bundled tight round his head. My eyes dropped to his boots and sure enough, they was a bit too shiny and pristine for him to have spent any significant time in the Muck Quarter. So I reckoned that what I had here was a wealthy client—or at least a representative of one—who was trying hard to remain incognito.

My Granny might’ve raised me to be humble, but she also didn’t raise me to be a fool. And as far as I’m concerned, when a man dressed like that comes up to you in a bar and says he’s heard that you’re the finest thief in the city, there ain’t but one thing you should say to him in response:

“That I am.”

The confirmation that I was indeed Jackson Balor, allegedly the finest thief in the city, seemed to calm the man—which was peculiar cuz I hadn’t even noticed he was stressed in the first place. He’d hid it so well that it weren’t even noticeable til he relaxed a bit, and then the difference was so obvious you couldn’t help but wonder how you’d never seen it in the first place.

“I have a job for you,” the man told me, which I’d already figured out on account of his whole demeanor. While he took a seat for himself on the stool beside me, I studied him. His hair looked to be clean and well-cut, and it was that sort of sandy color where you’re not sure if you should call it brown or blond. And he had these gray eyes that kept darting all over the place like he expected to get jumped at any moment—rich folks always expect they’re about to be jumped whenever they come to slum it down here with the rest of us. He kept his hood bound around him, especially round his neck, and wore long loose sleeves and gloves. In fact, it looked like his head was the only part of him that wasn’t covered up.

“It’s a dangerous job,” the man went on after ordering a glass of whiskey. He held it in front of him but didn’t take a sip. “And it’s vital that I have your absolute discretion.”

“Of course,” I told him. “But I don’t work for cheap.”

“Naturally.” He relaxed a bit again, in that peculiar way of his where I didn’t even realize he was stiff til I saw the change. I guess talking money was familiar and comfortable territory for a rich fella like him. “I am prepared to offer you three thousand Crowns; half up front and half upon completion of the job.”

Now the first rule of negotiating is to never look too impressed by the first figure, but I don’t think it’d shock anyone to tell y’all how hard that was for me. By Perdition, my rent was fifty Crowns a month and that was most of my living expenses right there! This fella was offering me, frankly, more money than I knew what to do with, and it was a struggle not to just stare at him like an idiot when he said that.

But again, my Granny didn’t raise no fool. I stayed as cool as I could manage, and I decided to see how far I could push Mister Moneybags here. So I told him: “I’ll do it for five thousand.”

Honestly, I was half-expecting him to laugh in my face, or maybe to get all indignant and storm out, or maybe just call me an imbecile, or something. Instead, he simply smiled.

“Four thousand,” he said. “That’s my final offer.”

’Course I accepted. Haggling’s all fine and dandy, but you don’t want to push your luck too much when a man’s waving that kind of coin around. I was feeling pretty good about myself, but I was also starting to get a bit scared, because if a man’s willing to pay a thief four thousand Crowns for something, it’s because he either has one doozy of a job lined up for him or he’s just plain stupid—and neither of those is a great possibility to consider when you’re a professional filcher like myself.

A professional’s what I was though, and like a professional I kept my cool and heard him out. And so two nights later, I was quite a few Crowns richer and hanging by my fingers off the wall of Lady Imogen Lugh’s lavish manor grounds.

Lady Lugh was a relative newcomer to the city, having only moved in and established herself about five years previous. Her place wasn’t really in the best part of town for this sort of nocturnal work, neither. It was down near the West Docks, not far from the bayou, where the air gets thick with bugs and the cries and moans of the sundry beasts who make their homes out there in the wild. Those bug lamps they’ve installed every few feet down there help a bit with one of those problems, but the extra light creates a whole new problem for folks like myself.

But one thing I can say about New Alms is that it ain’t lacking in nooks and crannies to hide in. There was this little spot along the manor’s outer wall where the street got real thin because they’d built some big office building a bit too close to it. Really, it felt more like an alley than an actual street, and I can’t imagine carriage traffic ever passed through it. But the bug lamps was scarce along that little stretch, and it made for a great little pocket of darkness for me to ply my trade in.

I was there and climbing up the wall as soon as I figured the streets were clear, which didn’t take long at all at that time of night. It never ceases to amaze me just how few police patrols there are in the wealthier parts of the city. It’s like they think rich folks are never up to no good or something.

Shows what they know, right?

Now, when I’m out on the job, I always dress for the occasion. What you wanna do is wear dark colors—but keep actual black to a minimum, alright? Black stands out against all but the deepest shadows something fierce, and if you’re ever in the deepest shadows it ain’t gonna matter what you’re wearing anyhow. Personally I always preferred very dark grays and browns. They just blend in better with the natural shades and hues of the city, in my experience. I always keep my hood up, too, and I’ve got a scarf that goes over my nose and mouth so only my eyes are visible.

As for my gloves, I got myself this real nice pair. Paid decent coin to get them specially treated so they’d grip real good. Only drawback is that they’re black, but I suppose that was alright. I said you gotta keep blacks to a minimum, right, and the only black on my person being my gloves absolutely counted as a minimum, far as I was concerned. Man who did the chemical treatment was a real nice fella too, and his prices were more than reasonable. If any of y’all are interested in pair, I’d be happy to give you his address, though I can’t say for certain if he’s still there nowadays.

Anyway, where was I?

Oh, right.

So there I was, hanging off the wall surrounding Lady Imogen Lugh’s illustrious home. The perimeter of her grounds was marked by an eight-foot-tall brick barrier, so it weren’t too difficult to run and jump and grab onto the top. Climbing the rest of the way was also no issue, cuz the top of the wall was adorned with these evenly spaced iron spikes which I’m sure were meant to keep people like me out, but instead made for some right convenient handholds.

All I needed to do was grab and lift, and if I had any issues lifting myself I just needed to use my feet to walk my way up the wall. Soon enough I was all huddled up at the top of the structure, which I imagine would’ve looked mighty strange to anyone who happened to pass by. My hands were on the shafts of those spikes, and my boots was planted on the narrow ledge beside them. My knees were all bent and my back was arched forward in a sort of curled-up crouch, like I was doing my best impression of some manner of beetle.

This next part was a tricky bit. The spikes might’ve made for some lovely handholds, but they was also two feet long with points as sharp as the Wild God’s own horns, which made the prospect of getting over them without also losing my balance, falling down, and breaking my neck a bit difficult.

But I’m Jackson Balor, the finest thief in all of New Alms—according my client at least. And I wouldn’t’ve put myself in this position if I didn’t have a plan. See, the dark narrow street was but one benefit to my chosen point of entry. The other benefit was the cypress tree that grew on the other side of the wall, whose branches extended over the top of it and looked more than sturdy enough to support a grown man’s weight, at least for a moment or two.

In fact, I’d go so far as to say that the thought of someone passing by at that moment didn’t even bother me none. Odds were that I’d just blend in with the clumps of needles all around me.

One hand firmly on a spike, I grabbed the sturdiest branch in reach. I held it for balance as I stood, and then I grabbed another branch and lifted my feet over the spikes below me. Soon enough, I’d hooked myself over the branches, and I was climbing my way over to the center of the tree.

I reached the trunk, then paused. Our bodies are heavy things, and tree branches tend to bend and shake when heavy things are moving on them. I waited til it stopped shaking, then peaked out through the greenery to examine the manor grounds below.

Can’t say I was all that impressed. You seen one noble’s manor, you seen them all. They love their sloping roofs and their pillars along balconies. This particular manor had one or two flourishes that made it stand out, I suppose—I noticed a few towers, all classical and castle-like. But it was mostly just more of the same. I also didn’t notice any lights on in the windows, which was good news for me.

Less good though was the glow I could see coming round the corner. The wall was only a few feet from the manor itself, and the tree was almost up against the wall, leaving space for a narrow side path below its branches. If I’d wanted, I could’ve shimmied down a branch and gone through a window—but I didn’t. My client had been clear about where the loot was, and heading inside the manor at this point would’ve just complicated things.

I needed to stay still anyway. The glow coming round the corner of the manor was getting brighter, and as I watched it I saw three figures walk into sight. They were guards. Two carried lanterns in their hands, and they each had a sword hanging from their sides. That was all well and good and expected, but the third guard gave me pause. He had this funny looking stick in his hands. A crystal had been fitted on the end of it, and there were all these copper wires running down the sides. The end opposite the crystal was carved like the handle of a crossbow, with a trigger and everything.

Nowadays they ain’t such an unusual sight, but at the time I had never seen an arcblaster in person before. Sure, I’d heard of them—fancy new weapons cooked up by the Cerenites over in their viarc labs—but they was still pretty new, and Lady Imogen must’ve spent a small fortune outfitting even one of her guards with that sort of cutting edge equipment.

Faced with this threat, I did the only a thing a rational man could do in my situation: I held my breath and froze. I sat crouched in that tree as stiff and still as a board, doing my best to stay as calm and unobtrusive as possible. The human eye tends to be drawn to movement, if you didn’t know, so if you’re fixing to be all stealthy and sneaky-like, you need to learn to be patient and still.

And that’s what I was putting into practice. I was still as a statue up there in that tree, silently praying to the Civilized God himself that I’d blend into the shadows and the guards wouldn’t notice me. There was a small sword strapped to my side, but I’d never had cause to use it before, and I knew damn well that it wouldn’t protect me at all if that fella with the arcblaster starting shooting his weapon off.

But I had one more thing going for me: folks don’t usually go around looking up above them. If you’re hiding out above a man’s head, then nine times out of ten he’s gonna walk right on past without ever realizing you’re there.

That don’t apply if a man’s distant, of course. Cuz then the high up stuff is in his field of vision. So I had to stay still and hope the tree provided me enough cover. I watched the guards approach, and it was only when they was directly under me that I let myself relax a little.

“Quiet night,” one of the lantern-holding guards noted as they passed under the tree. They were all wearing leather coats and black boots, and they had black caps on their heads.

“It’s always a quiet night,” replied the guard with the arcblaster. “Don’t know why Miss Lugh bothered buying this thing.”

“If you don’t want it, we can trade,” said the other lantern-holder.

Mister Arcblaster scoffed at that. “By Perdition we will!”

By then they’d walked right on by me. I turned my head and peeked out around the tree trunk, waited til they was turning the next corner, and then hopped down into the grass below. I landed in a crouch, then crept on after them.

Most folks don’t usually have much reason to look behind themselves neither, unless you give them one. That’s why I figured it was safer for me to follow those fellas, rather than try creeping round the other way and risk getting caught by a different patrol. Well, that and the fact they was headed for the back of the manor, and that happened to be my destination as well. I followed them round the corner to the big garden back there.

Y’all ain’t never seen a garden til you seen a rich folk’s garden. I’ve pilfered from many a noble in my day, and I seen all sorts of gardens, each more elaborately arranged than the last, but let me just say that I ain’t never seen one quite like Lady Lugh’s. The ground was all carved up and filled with water, making all these little ponds and streams. Machinery was installed here and there to pump the water and keep it flowing, but it’d been covered up with sod and vines and flowers to disguise it. There was wooden bridges crisscrossing the waterways, and stone paths connecting the bridges, and all sorts of bushes and plants growing wild and free betwixt them.

’Tweren’t much like any other gardens I knew of. Rich folks—civilized folks—tend to like things to be orderly, with everything in a neat little row and not even a single leaf out of place. By contrast, Lady Lugh’s garden was this wild and chaotic mess of a thing, with all the plants growing about however which way they pleased. Even the pathways through the garden didn’t seem to follow any set pattern.

The guards didn’t bother with heading into that garden. Truth be told, they seemed to give the fixture as wide a berth as they could, like they was nervous about it. I suppose I can’t really blame them for that—I was pretty nervous too seeing that garden. My Granny raised me to respect Cerenis and treasure his gift of civilization, like any good god-fearing sort, and that crazy garden reminded me too much the dangerous wilds he lifted mankind out of for my comfort.

My trio of guards cut through the garden exactly once, when they crossed over the path connecting that greater wild thing to the manor’s solarium. There the plants were slightly more ordered, with little flower beds planted neatly beside the intersection of the pathways. That was a bit of a comforting sight for me, seeing as the solarium also happened to be my destination.

Pardon me. I don’t believe I’ve mentioned what it was I’d been hired to steal, have I? Please excuse my poor form, fellas. It’s been a right long day, and sometimes I have difficulty getting all my thoughts in order.

See, my client was interested in a very particular mask. He told me that it was an old relic—one of those really ancient pagan pieces from before Cerenis graced humanity with the light of order. Despite its age, the mask was well-preserved, and it was therefore worth quite a bit of coin to anyone who knew its true historic value.

He’d stressed that last bit a mite more than he strictly needed. I reckon he thought I’d be tempted to steal such a high-value item for myself, and figured I’d be smart enough to know that not a single fence in New Alms would have the know-how to recognize the mask’s true worth. But he didn’t need to worry about that. Like I been saying, I’m a professional, and even if I wasn’t, I sure would’ve been willing to be one for four-thousand Crowns.

So while the guards continued walking the manor’s perimeter and rounded the next corner out of sight, I crept my way over to the solarium’s back door and gave the handle a try. I wasn’t too surprised to find it locked, though I’d be lying if I said it weren’t a bit disappointing. My job would’ve been so much easier if folks forgot to lock their doors every now and then. But luckily situations like this were exactly why we invented lockpicks, and I pulled my set from my pouch and got to work.

Funny little things, locks. You just see a keyhole on the outside, but on the inside there’s all these itty-bitty pins, and how it’s supposed to work is that the key pushes those pins into their proper place and then a-click and you’re good. But when you ain’t got the key, and instead all you got is some picks, then what you instead gotta do is jiggle the little metal stick around in there and listen and feel for the little clicks the pins make when they slide into place. Then once they’re all lined up right and proper, you can apply a bit of pressure and turn the thing.

One last click, and the way is open.

Lady Lugh’s lock was a simple one to pick, but I reckon most locks seem simple when you’ve been picking them since you was a kid. I was just sliding the final pin into place when I saw something out of the corner of my eye—a glow of lantern light, coming round the side of the house.

Turns out there’d been a second patrol after all, and now they was making their way over to me. I probably had a few seconds at most before the guards’d be right on top of me, and I weren’t too eager to get myself all chopped to bits by swords or shot to pieces by an arcblaster—or even worse: removed from the premises, which would have been a right embarrassing thing to happen to a professional thief like yours truly.

But did I panic? No I did not. I’d been doing this far too long to panic just cuz some guard might see me. I kept myself calm and I kept my hand steady, and I turned that lock and opened up that door and slipped myself inside. Closing the door as gently as possible, I heard the soft click of the latch right as the lantern light was washing its way over the back garden and seeping in through the crack along the floor. I crouched down behind that door as quiet as a mouse, and I watched the light as it passed by the windows of the solarium.

There’s quite a lot of windows in a solarium, in case y’all didn’t know. Not sure how familiar y’all happen to be with upper class architecture, but having lots of windows is sort of the defining feature of solariums.

Once this second patrol had passed me by, I relaxed a bit and stood up. My eyes had adjusted to the darkness about as well as they could, and I could make out enough of what was in the room with me that all that relaxation I just did was immediately undone.

That garden outside was a wild thing, sure, but it weren’t nothing compared to the garden Lady Imogen Lugh was keeping inside her home.

First off, it was huge. I’d known it was big seeing it from the outside, but the inside was so big I had trouble wrapping my head around how it could fit. It was bigger than any solarium had any right to be, and the air was warm and thick with humidity.

There was another pond in here, and the surface of the water was covered in algae and lily pads and moss and all sorts of other kinds of green. The vegetation was so thick it took me a moment to even realize a pond was there at all. Thorny bushes lined the edges of the solarium, and leafy vines crept up from them along the walls and windows. More vines hung like snakes from above, and I thought I could catch glimpses of various critters moving up and down them, but it was too dark to be sure.

None of that was the first thing I noticed about that big glass room, though. No, the first thing I noticed was the fact that there was a great big tree in the center of it, growing straight out of a small island in the center of that pond and looming large over everything else. The vines were in fact hanging from its branches, and though I couldn’t tell what sorts of leaves it had, I was damn sure I could see movement up there in its foliage, and I shuddered to think of what sorts of creatures might make their nests there.

By this point I was wondering—hoping, really—that my client had some bad information. Aside from the door behind me and the glass of the windows, I saw nothing that looked manmade in that solarium. If someone had come along and told me that I’d crossed through some manner of portal and been magically transported to a strange and freaky forest, I reckon I would’ve fully believed them without a second thought. The idea that a valuable mask, or really even anything of value at all, might be somewhere in all this nature seemed ludicrous.

Still, I figured I might as well sweep through the place, just to be sure. I took a few steps forward, and received the shock of my life.

Golden light bloomed around me. The floor was covered in grass and soil, and all throughout that grass were these little yellow flower bulbs that bloomed open when I got close, and when they did soft light the same color as their petals emanated from their cores.

I froze, thinking at first that some unseen watchman had spotted me and illuminated my now-conspicuous form. Once I ascertained the true source of the light, however, that fear was replaced with a new one. I cast my eyes back at the windows, and took small comfort in the fact that they was all covered up in vines. Those would block a lot of things, but not light. After all, I’d been able to see the guards’ lanterns through them, hadn’t I?

With nowhere else to go, I sprinted forward, toward that pond and the big tree in the center of the room, and I was gratified to look over my shoulder and see the flowers closing back up and dimming as I drew away. ’Course my motion was also drawing me into the vicinity of more flowers, which bloomed and shone in my presence then folded and faded as I passed, but I figured that the further I could get from the windows the better, and the less likely any passing guard would be to spot the lights coming on and off within the solarium.

I made my way round the pond, hoping to use the big tree to block the flowerlights from view, and as I rounded the bend I stumbled onto the one piece of evidence of human hands in the whole place: a wooden bridge, extending in a lovely arch from the edge of the pond to the great tree in the center, lined with finely polished handrails and looking sturdy and new like it’d just been built yesterday.

There was more flowers on the other side of the bridge. A cluster of vines had grown up along the trunk, and blooming gold flowers lined them, illuminating the pale shape of a wood-carved mask nestled against the bark of the tree. But that ain’t all.

The vines beneath the mask were thin, and they’d grown in a peculiar and dare I say alarming fashion. They wove around each other in a shape that at first implied the form of a man, but which seemed less and less like one the longer I looked at it. Men, after all, do not possess claws or horns or a tail. The mask was perched on the shape’s head, and my blood ran cold when I realized exactly what sort of pagan business this old relic was truly connected to.

What I was standing in was none other than a shrine to Ferengris, the Wild God, wicked brother to the Civilized God Cerenis, and the Master of Chaos and Enemy of Civilization. I’d never been foolish enough to believe New Alms was a city of virtue—not even as a child; I got eyes and ears, don’t I?—but even so I was taken aback by the blasphemy before me, and in that moment I was struck with a terror such as I had never felt before as I realized that Lady Lugh was not simply some eccentric rich woman, but rather a heretic and a Wild cultist.

All at once the nature of her garden and her solarium made a sickening sort of sense to me. I was trespassing in her house or worship, walking among the fruits of the Wild God, and everything within me demanded that I flee now and return to the safe embrace of civilization, maybe run down to the Temple and tell the Cerenites all about what I’d seen.

But I did none of that. I’d come here for a job, after all. Sure, I was terrified, and sure, I wanted to wash myself in holy oil and beg the Civilized God for absolution, but there was four-thousand Crowns and my professional reputation on the line, and I weren’t about to leave here without my ticket to that big payout.

So I walked up to the bridge, ready to cross it and take the mask. But when I reached it, I realized I was not alone.

Curled up on the grass just before the wooden planks began was a black cat. It was a relatively big cat, I guess, but not outside the realm of what was normal for its kind, and it was lean and didn’t seem to resemble a wild beast at all. It was a normal house cat, curled up and asleep, snoozing away as content as could be.

Not wishing to disturb the rest of this fine feline, I stepped lightly, and I stepped over the sleeping creature and snuck my way over the bridge. The face carved into the mask seemed to be watching me as I drew closer.

I did not appreciate that face. It had a big grin carved into it, and that grin made it look like the shape of Ferengris in the vines was smiling at me, as though I were amusing him with my mortal antics, or as though he were inviting me to try and steal the mask away.

When I reached out and snatched the mask off that tree, a part of me expected something right awful to happen. Maybe a slavering beast would burst forth from the waters below and attack, or maybe the vines would spring to life and grab me. But nothing of the sort happened. Instead, I was left standing there with a wooden mask in my hands, looking at the vine-shape of the now-faceless Wild God.

It was warm, like skin is warm. And I thought I could feel a faint pulse in the wood, like a heartbeat. But I concentrated and felt nothing, so I figured—hoped—that I’d just been feeling my own racing bloodflow.

Enough was enough. My nerves were frayed and I wanted desperately to get out of this unholy place. I turned around just in time to see the cat stand up and stretch.

Its long body went taut, then relaxed. It shook itself in the way animals sometimes do when trying to shake that last bit of sleep away. Then it looked up at me with big green eyes.

It looked at me with three big green eyes.

Two of them were where you’d expect a cat’s eyes to be, and the third was smack-dab in the middle of its forehead. It cocked it head to the side like it was studying me, trying to figure out what this human was doing in its home, and then it sauntered off unhurriedly and disappeared somewhere into the myriad plants that filled the solarium. Its footsteps did not awaken the weird flowerlights.

Well if I thought I’d had enough before, I had definitely had enough now.

I made my way back to the door as quick as I could, crouched down behind and close to it, and waited for a guard patrol to pass by. Once it was gone, I opened the door up and fled back to the tree I’d used to sneak onto the grounds in the first place. A quick climb, and I was gone, with none but that freaky three-eyed cat aware that I had ever even been present at all.

Had I not been so shaken, had I had my full wits about me, then I like to think I would have noticed that the mask had grown cooler to the touch, or that the cat had followed me out and was watching me as I fled.

The Thief and the Wild will release on July 19th! Pre-order the ebook for $3.99 HERE: https://books2read.com/u/b5JRVR

[chandajaan]

I'm going to be burnt at the stake for this but...I feel like so far cruel prince is just OK, like I needed more freak behaviour

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Thank you. I'm sorry.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[naturecalls111]

I think I love Sanji so extra much because he’d acknowledge my ‘girl-ness’ in a way that I feel like has not ever been acknowledged in a way I wanted it to be wails

The chivalry intended not with hopeful reciprocation but with admiration. WAILS.

[dailykugisaki]

Day ninety-five | id in alt

Long time no Nanami💥

[milf-harrington]

its so fucking disheartening realising that no one actually sees me as a guy, they just pretend to - and yeah its great being called theo but its less great being lumped in as one of the girls in the same breath

[petorahs]

me, gearing up to explain why the dragon prince's latest seasons have continued to disappoint me, that while i love the lore and worldbuilding and characters there are clear pacing issues that are so jarring it takes me out of the experience, and that i say all of this with great love for the series but there's only so much good concepts can do before animation has to catch up in order to retain the average viewer's attention. that although season 4 and 5 have been branded as "the mystery of aaravos" the titular character barely appears and that is a crime to me, that even if it's for the suspense and intentionally leaving the viewer/main characters in the dark it's not doing a good job at building up his character and i fear for the exposition dump that will inevitably happen later on. that i will be harsh in critiquing this series because i love it so much and want it to be the best it can be: *inhales*

also me the moment i actually finished the goddamn season:

[hecksupremechips]

Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩

[kn11ves]

yall gotta give other old russian authors apart from dostoevsky and tolstoy a chance. pushkin bunin gorky bulgakov turgenev goncharov and chekhov are all whimpering and crying in a corner im so for real

[sarioh]

love how we all expected all the hermits to be super generous towards etho when he came back and give him a bunch of stuff to get back on his feet but instead he gets pranked 3 times by 4 different people in the span of 15 minutes and also gets relentlessly bullied and shamed by beef for his embarrassing RNG . the hermits were all like Oh look etho’s finally back let’s make his life a living hell <3 awesome

[vaugarde]

ohhhh thinking about the parallels between odin/maya and frost/marlow/valerie rn