#this .. gives me miah feels

[cunt-dracula0]

SPEAK SOFTLY LOVE

— “WE’RE IN A WORLD, OUR VERY OWN. SHARING A LOVE THAT ONLY FEW HAVE EVER KNOWN.”

pairing; post spray jeremiah valeska x fem!reader

summary; jeremiah takes you to see the first part of one of his favourite film franchises of all time. the godfather. and when you return from seeing such a cinematic masterpiece, jeremiah decides to dance with you to one of the songs from it.

note; HII!! i can’t even explain how excited i am to be writing this. i love the godfather and gotham, so i’m glad the thought came to me. nothing wrong with appreciating my love for both jeremiah valeska and michael corleone;)

also, here’s some of the italian words used in this fic, and what they mean! (if these ain’t accurate just blame google translate)

non smetti mai di sembrare raggiante, tesoro. - you never fail to look radiant, darling.

grazie - thank you.

MASTERLIST

You and Jeremiah panted as you had ran back in the rain to the entry of his hideout. Tonight he’d took you to see one of his favourite cinema classics. The Godfather.

He’d had this planned for AGES. Years even. He knew one day he wanted to share with you the joy he felt in watching such an amazing cinematic masterpiece. And today, he had successfully got what he wanted.

There was tons of abandoned theatres scattered throughout Gotham. But Jeremiah didn’t want to take you somewhere shabby and wrecked. No.

He’d taken you to Gotham’s oldest theatre. A building that had been stood even before the very first time The Godfather came to cinemas. It was high class, and full of money people at all times. The theatre was known for showing tons of classics. So tonight was Jeremiah’s lucky night.

He’d made sure he booked out the whole screening. He didn’t want a soul interrupting any moment he was planning on enjoying with you. Only thing was that because of how high class the theatre was, it would cost a shit load to buy tickets, let alone the whole thing.

Jeremiah made sure the owner knew that money wasn’t everything. Well.. after holding a blade to his throat.

The whole thing went smoothly. And you’d never seen him so happy. He looked more like an excited child rather than a grown man thrilled to see the most loved mafia movie on the big screen.

As the heels of his shoes tapped against the flooring, you heard him softly hum the Godfather waltz. And he did so with nothing but pride.

You sat on the couch, your fingers slowly tracing circles onto the beautiful fabric. Jeremiah always had ways of making you feel so expensive.

“A glass of Chianti, darling?” He called out.

You looked back and nodded as he swiftly poured the Italian wine into a tall crystal glass for you.

Jeremiah carefully strutted over to you, two glasses in his hands. He placed one down in front of you, giving you a kiss on the hand.

“I must say,” He said, sitting down beside you, already motioning for you to move closer. “My expectations for this night with you were perfectly met, my dear.”

Jeremiah put a gloved finger on your cheek, and you practically purred at his touch. He held your waist as you moved into his lap, grinning.

“I suppose now I see why you always used to be so persistent on having that slicked back hair, Don Valeska.” You mocked. You’d known for years Jeremiah took a deep liking to Michael Corleone’s character. You couldn’t blame him, of course. Michael and Jeremiah both shared a great charm.

He rolled his eyes playfully, taking a sip of his wine. He let out a small gasp as an idea struck him. And you furrowed your brows the minute he took you off his lap.

“Miah?” You said, curiosity clear in your voice. He held a finger up, hurrying into another room. You just sighed, wondering what he was planning now.

Jeremiah soon returned, a vinyl in hand. He flashed you a smile, before darting over to the record player. He set it all up, and you started to giggle the minute the song started to play.

Speak Softly Love by Andy Williams. A song that included an instrumental theme used in The Godfather. Which had made the song a true gem to listen to.

He rushed back over to you, and you could see the amount of joy dancing around in his eyes despite the song only just starting.

“Shall we?” Jeremiah grinned, putting his hand out for you.

You accepted it, and he immediately pulled you up. Gracefully, but you could tell he was desperate to finally dance with you to this.

Speak softly, love and hold me warm against your heart..

I feel your words, the tender trembling moments start.

We're in a world, our very own..

Sharing a love that only few have ever known.

Another soft giggle escaped your lips as he directed you to sway around with him. You’d never admitted it, but Jeremiah was an incredible dancer. Always so careful with his partner.

Wine-colored days warmed by the sun..

Deep velvet nights, when we are one.

“Non smetti mai di sembrare raggiante, tesoro.” Jeremiah whispered into your ear. God you loved when he spoke Italian.

“Grazie.” You replied, planting a kiss onto his cheek. However, he redirected your lips. He tilted your chin upward, and soon you felt his own velvety smooth lips brushing against yours.

He put one hand on the back of your head, caressing your hair. He pulled away as the rest of the lyrics played on the vinyl, and the two of you went back to swaying again.

Speak softly, love so no one hears us but the sky..

The vows of love we make will live until we die.

My life is yours and all because..

You came into my world with love, so softly love.

You both waltzed around the room as the strong instrumental part of the song really kicked in. You caught a glimpse of Jeremiah’s face glistening from the moonlit sky outside throughout Gotham.

You’d truly began to admire his new features now. His ghostly white face, red ruby lips, and those icy green eyes..

Some were scared, meanwhile others like his followers found it intriguing. But you.. oh.. you found it hauntingly beautiful.

His change in attitude was also something you were secretly enjoying. Before the spray, Jeremiah had been incredibly shy with showing you affection. His overthinking always crept in, giving him the hint that perhaps you did not feel the same way towards him as he did for you.

Now, he was incredibly bold whilst showing his love for you. And he wanted every single person in the city to see that.

Wine-colored days warmed by the sun..

Deep velvet nights, when we are one.

His gloved hands made their way down your body, cupping your hips. Jeremiah loved your curves. You were so womanly. And it was another part of you he’d always admired.

“This is…” He breathed. “Rather.. exhilarating.”

Speak softly, love so no one hears us but the sky..

The vows of love we make will live until we die.

My life is yours and all because..

You came into my world with love…

“It’s definitely-“

“A night to remember.” Jeremiah cut you off. You dipped down as he hovered above you, his grip tight. He bent toward you, kissing you once again.

So softly love.

THIS WAS LITERALLY SO FUN TO WRITE. either that or it’s the concept of mixing my two favourite interests together. but man i love jeremiah more than anything.

[onwardevan]

Double cheat

Warnings:cheating,high fuck,weed,smut,grinding, sub Evan,Dom y/n,idk if there's any others?

Since it's Christmas I decided y/ns mom will have a family gathering and yeah.Y/n gets overwhelmed and thank god Evan smoked weed?

"Okay,these are my relatives so please don't pull anything." I grin towards my bf.

we had just arrived at my moms house for a family gathering since it's Christmas. Everyone has a +1 invite so I decided to bring my bf with me.

"I promise." Erin smirks and pulls his pinky out.

We walk to the door and I ring the doorbell,holding Erin's hand nervously since I haven't seen my relatives since like...never.

"Y/NNNN!HEYY!" My sister greeted and opened her arms for a hug.

Thank god she was the one to answer the door.She was the only one that I have actually had a good relationship with since I went in the mental hospital at fucking 12.

"Heyyy!" I said and hugged her back.

I walked in the house to be met with my other sister Miah."Hey y/n...and Erin.." she said,giving Erin a weird look?

"Who's he?" I asked,pointing towards this man next to my sister.He was decent height,brown curls,a nice beard and dark brown eyes.

"Oh- this is Evan!" She said and hugged his arm."my boyfriend,soon to be fiancé!" She smiled.

"That's good!" I said and walked Erin towards the couch everyone was sitting at.

-----

For some reason Erin wanted to sit next to Miah and Evan??I don't think much of it and think it's just them wanting to get along?

"Yeah- and that one time y/n FACE PLANTED the concrete while riding a bike!" My dad laughed.

"DAD?!" I covered my face as i awkwardly laughed."I'll be back." I said,still slightly laughing.

I walked down the halls and to the bathroom,closing the door but not locking it.This house is so full it's overwhelming.I can't go anywhere without someone being in the room.the living room had me panicking!I thought I could come to the bathroom for some peace before I heard a knock.

"Oh my god..." I sigh.

"What?" I say.

"You alright?" He asks through the door,Evan's voice?

"Yeah I'm good it's just- it's overwhelming with how full this house is!" I say and plant my head into my hands while leaning onto the counter.

"Oh.. I can help calm you down? that's actually the reason I came here." I heard him laugh.What....did he mean?!?

"What??" I asked.

"Weed, I have weed."

"Ohhhhh!"

-----

We were sitting in the dry bathtub. Our legs hanging off the edge of the tub as we passed the joint back and forth. I had texted my mom earlier telling her I had to go, making Erin stay here by himself.

I grabbed the joint and put it to my lips, taking a puff and that's when Evan told me something u thought I would never fucking hear...

"Erin's cheating." He calmly said as he turned his head to look at me.

"What?!" I said,coughing up all the smoke and almost dropping the joint.

"Yeah. I went through Miahs phone this morning and found out they were planning to have sex today. In this very room." He said.

"No- Erin wouldn't do that? What are you talking about??" I said and sat up.

"But he would." Evan said and went on his phone,showing me a screenshot of text messages.

"She finally said yes." -Erin

"Omg about time?!" -Miah

"Yeah. but what about Evan? Isnt he gonna be suspicious of you just leaving like that?" -Erin.

"He probably won't Evan notice, we'll be fine.Be ready 😉" -Miah...

"Oh my god..." I said as I read more.

"Yeah." Evan said and put his phone away.

An instant wave of jealousy and revenge rushed over me.I remembered my family went out earlier to the movies,but Erin and Miah stayed...

"I have an idea." I said.

I climbed on top of Evan, straddling him. His eyes went wide when he realized what I meant. He quickly put the joint out in the edge of the tub and placed his hands on my waist.

"O-okay.." he said.

I started to grind down on him as I felt him slowly harden. When he was fully hard I stopped grinding on him but he stopped me.

"No...d-don't stop...please." He sighed.

"I can make you feel even better if you let me.." I whispered to him.

"Mmmmm.." he groaned as he let go of my hips.

"Please." He whimpered. Trying to make me hurry.

I quickly pulled his shorts and boxers down, setting his cock free. I moved my shorts and panties down to my anklesI was gonna go slow before Evan grabbed my waist and slammed me down

"Ohhh~" I moaned at the pain of the suden stretch, enjoying everything bit of him in me

"Mmm!Shit!" He moaned, throwing his head back and moving his hands to my thighs

He

"Ohhh fuck!" I moaned.

"WHAT ARE YALL DOING?!" Erin banged on the bathroom door

"HAVING THE BEST FUCKING TIME HOLY SHIT!" Evan yelled out.

"OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR!" Erin yelled

"Y-YEAH ONE SECOND IM ALMOST THERE!" He moaned out and laid me down in the tub so he could thrust faster.

"OH FUCK-" I moaned at the way his speed fastened.

"I'm so close!fuck I'm so close!" Evan moaned and pressed his lips to mine as he slammed into me,Again,and again,until I finally orgasmed.Tightening around Evan.

"SHIT-augh...." he moaned as he spilled his white release into me.

"Y/N?!OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR!"

[idkfnok]

11:11: Let Me Show You (p2)

Main Characters: Jehraye "Jay" Guidry; Alani "Lan" Sanders

A real slow-burn

PT 1

I  get back home to Georgia after 11p.m. I lowkey wanted to call Jehraye, but I figured he would’ve been asleep. I get in my car and drive, I loved going back to N.O. but, I did miss downtown Augusta. It’s similar to a lot of places but, still aint nothing like it. I get home, take my bags up to my apartment, take a shower, reheat that white chicken chili I had left, I ate and went to sleep.

I woke up the next morning around 10, with A missed call from My mama. I know she’s calling to ask about New Orleans. I made a mental note to call her later. I brush my teeth and get dressed before heading over to the Tattoo shop that Nya owns and doing a little voluntary receptionist work for awhile. I love coming to her shop. Because not only did I get free reign to the little snack bar she had. I  got to interact with some cool ass people too. Nya’s a traditional tattoo artist. The people in her shop though, were cartoonist and realist, shit, she even had a traditional stick -and - poke artist too. Dymo, the Realist, actually did the portrait of my great grandma I got  three years ago after she passed. All of their work was top-notch. Nya wouldn’t stand for anything else. Which showed, not only in her work, but that of the one’s she hired too.

 She was always playing music too. It jumped all over the place. She went from indie artists like music by this  dude named Money from Atlanta, Russ to Rodwave, Kodak black, Jacob banks, King von, Kirk franklin to Gallant and Marco Mckinnis ; all the way to Panic at the Disco and all things in between.Crazy enough, the dude “Money” is one of her  best friends.   Her only preference in most aspects of her life  was “I like it.” Music was no different.  Mari Walked in at about 11:30. I knew then, my voluntary duties were done. I got up from the desk, hugged Mari, yelled that I was leaving and made my way out of the shop and to the Mall so I can go stare at the back of Spencer’s and ponder not buying shit before I made my way to Victoria’s secret and sniffed around for perfume to buy at their semi annual sale. I picked up the Rainbow Shower, Desert Sky and Cactus Water. 

What does the schedule look like for the rest of the day?

“Consultation at 11: 45, Surgery at 12:30 , then lunch ;  You’re  tightening Miah’s braces, check the schedule for tomorrow and we should both  be outta here by 4. 

Cool.”

“ So how was your wednesday?”

It was good, why you ask?

“Jaelai told me you went on a date or something yesterday morning.”

Tell yo wife to mind her business.

“My wife, yo sister.”

I bet she the one who sent Toni ass to my table.

“Nooooo. What she say?”

She was chill until I give her the tip, then she talmbout “Make sure you get yo child”

“No she didn’t”

The hell if she didn’t!  had my date looking at me funny

“😂”

That shit ain’t funny. Im tryna support her and she throwing salt in the game 😂

“Toni was always fucking with you. She’s been doing it as long as she’s been with Kieran 

I know. But, damn if she don’t do it at the worst times.

 “Well you got the crybaby today so, be prepared.”

She never cried with me.I don’t know what you be doing to my niece but she don’t like it 

“I’m her daddie.”

Maybe it’s because you white.

“I have been white her whole life.”

Ion know maybe she just like me better.

“ Yeah because you always give her what she want.”

She ten , why not?

“I feel sorry for any  man who dates any of your daughters.”

Why you say that?

“Cause her like whoever her mama gonna be, is gonna be spoiled to hell. Cause you brother, are a Hopeless Romantic with a damn good job and a real love of women.”

Always. Speaking of  romance, you just reminded me that I gotta call Lan once I get off.

The rest of the day went by smooth. The consultation led to another appointment next month for braces, I tightened my nieces braces and The surgery; started and finished quicker than I expected. I was outta the office by 4: 15 . I got in my car and called Alani.

“Hello.”

Hey gorgeous, how you doing?

“I’m doing aight”

That’s good. , how has your day been? Give me details please

“It was pretty good. I woke up, ate, brushed my teeth, got dressed and I went to Nya’s shop.”

Which one of your friends was Nya again?

“The one who had on the red bodycon dress.”

Okay

“ Yeah she’s a tattoo artist. I go to her shop sometimes to help and steal snacks.”

Uh huh

“ Talked to some customers and chilled until Mari got there.”

That’s the one with the red hair?

“Yep.”

Before you continue. Speaking of jobs, what do you do?

“I’m a doula. 

Oh Okay, I’m a Orthodontist.

“ At 28?!”

Yes, I have been for like a year, almost two.  Anyway, continue on.

“I left the shop, went to the mall and called my mama back after I left Victoria’s Secret, and i’ve been home for a few hours. 

Foreal? Cool, i'm bout to Facetime you. 

I press the camera icon and wait for her to answer. When she does, the first thing I notice is how shiny her lips are. She has this 90’s lip combo. You know the one with the 5% tint around the edges and it looks amazing on her. I compliment her and our conversation continues. She tells me that she is a birth doula and some of what that entails. I ain’t ever see anybody give birth but, the way she describes it makes it sound like one of the scariest and most beautiful things ever. Most of her clients are Black women, second time moms who have had terrible experiences in the hospital. From women almost dying because nurses and doctors try to write their pain off as “normal” shit.  

If the person dealing with this is telling you that they can’t breathe, they have a splitting headache or can’t feel their legs long after the epidural should’ve worn off, you should listen. Hearing her recount some of these stories pissed me off. You shouldn’t fear for your or child’s  life coming into the hospital.  I learned some things like water births are really popular and are often more relaxing for the mother. That tidbit of information I tucked into my back pocket. 

We talked about the time my tooth went through the bottom of my lip and left a scar when I was a kid, my first sexual experience at 14 that involved licking whipped cream off of some pussy once or twice. She told me about the time she ran head first into a brick wall when she was 8 and how she snorted salt up her nose when she was 13 because she “wanted to see what  it felt like if she ever snorted powder.”  on some wild shit. I was really enjoying the conversation. So much so, that I hadn’t realized I was home, sitting in my car for the past five hours. I looked at the time on my  phone and it was 9:40 and I needed to get in the house so that I could shower, eat and go to bed. 

Things continued that way for a few more days. Us updating one another throughout the day, nightly phone calls, early morning voice messages. Sending badly angled and funny looking pictures of each other from facetime calls. I've watched her get dressed and she’s watched me get undressed. We’ve fallen asleep on the phone only to wake up and one of us has hung up. And it’s usually her.  We’ve given one another recipes. Her recipe for brown butter chocolate chip pecan cookies is top tier and she  gave me  a lot of praise on my five cheese macaroni.  Before I knew it,  the Thursday of our date had shown up. I woke up that morning to the reminder and was hella excited. I had been thinking about what to cook for two days now and I decided on Smothered Okra with shrimp and tomatoes over rice. I called her, told her what I had in mind; she said it sounded good and she was going to cook the same; but add chicken to it. 

We Facetimed each other while shopping for food. I helped her pick out the proper seasonings and ingredients needed for the dish and advised her to pick up a bag of  Basmati rice instead of “regular” rice.  I picked up cut okra while she wanted the whole Okra.I grabbed a bottle of wine and she passed on that. We went back to our houses and started preparing the meal. I ain't feel like chopping onions, so I bought the pre-cut ones. She was all about the full process. She chopped her onions, peppers and all while I watched as she struggled to cut some of ‘em because she don’t know how to properly handle a knife. She more than proved my point when she sliced her damned finger, dropped the knife and probably almost cut her foot too.

Baby, be careful, please!

“I’m fine Jehraye, it’s just a little cut. The knife ain’t that sharp”

And that’s probably the problem Lan. Get you some better knives Bae. 

“My knives work just fine.”

No they do not, clearly. You were struggling to cut the bell pepper.

“That’s because I don’t know how to cut shit.”

Aight, so you got one option, start buying pre-cut vegetables.

“I will not.”

Then I suggest you get on youtube and learn how to use knives because I'mma order you some new ones.

“Jay-”

No, bae you don’t wanna use pre- cut stuff, I'm getting you new knives. So go ‘head and give me A FedEx drop off, P.O. box, your address or something. 

“How about this-”

If ain’t no solution in this baby, don’t even say nothing.

“How about when you come visit me, we can look at  knives together.”

 Aight that sounds- wait! You gonna let me come see you?!

“Yes sir. Just not until the end of the month.”

Baaaaaabbbbbbyyyy, that’s like 3 weeks away.

“You’ll be fine.”

Nuh uh…. My doctor said if I don’t see you in two weeks imma die.

“Ohhh you so dramatic 😂 yo ass is not gonna die.”

When I am touch deprived for a long time, I start to waste away into a pile of dirt.

“I can’t with you. Jehraye Guidry, you are something else.”

We talk while finishing up the food and once she turns her smothered Okra and shrimp down she announces that she’s about to get in the shower so she can get dressed and the rest of our date can continue. We hang up and about 35 minutes later she’s calling me while she finishes up the rest of her routine. I don't mind because I am also on the tail end of finishing up my hair. I choose to go with a braid out because I know she’s wanted to see my hair. She calls back when I am almost done taking out my last braid. She’s putting on lipgloss and perfume. When she looks at the camera, she gasps and says “Your hair!”

Yeah. you said you wanted to see it out so, I decided to wear it out.

“You look so cute. Now I really wanna play in it.”

Well, when I come to see you; you can play in it for a few minutes

“Why only a few minutes?”

You think Imma come to Augusta and just sit around? We gotta order  knives and I wanna go to the mellow mushroom. You said it was a cool bar and I wanna see a lil bit of  your city.

“But what if I wanna just lay up with you and play in your hair?”

We can do that. But, you already told me that you like rubbing on folks and I like being rubbed on. That goes on for too long, We might end up in a few more positions than you intended , and you gon be doing a hell of a lot more than playing in my hair.

“ I’m down for wherever that leads us.”

Alani

“Jehraye”

Let me be clear, you rubbing on me…we fucking.

“I understand what you’re saying.”

Yeah, but are you okay with that happening?

“Yes, I want it to.”

Aight. Listen, I've been waiting for this.

“What do you mean?”

I purposefully ain’t been jacking off for about a week.”

“Okay.”

And imma hold off until I get to you.

“Oohhhhh”

Yeah so, you better be prepared.

“I hear you.”

We sit down at our tables and begin eating.  I wait to see her take her first bite.  I wanted her to like it because the recipe I gave her is truly my own and I wanted to know if she fucked with it. The way my eyes lit up when I saw  hers damn near bulge out of her head; the only way I coulda been any happier in that moment was if she and I were sitting in front of each other. I spooned  some of the food into my mouth as she moaned satisfactorily at the first taste of my food, she had no idea she was eating.  After telling her that I couldn't wait to see her, our conversation took a very sexual turn as we discussed some of the things we were and weren’t willing to do.

“How do you feel about aftercare?”

I rarely ever do it, but the times I have; i’ve enjoyed it.

“Why don’t you do it more?”

My goal is to satisfy the woman and myself, if that puts her to sleep; so be it.

“So aint nobody ever put you to sleep?”

Some have. 

“Well, I expect aftercare.”

And you gon get it, if you aint sleep.

So what’s your views on sucking dick?

“I like it. I only do it like a spur of the moment thing. I don’t plan it.”

Okay. I like kissing.That’s before, definitely during and after sex.

“Me too.”’

 Aight so, how would you feel if I wanted to eat yo ass?

“That’s a “no”.”

How come?

“I like to kiss, eating ass and kissing don’t usually go hand-in-hand.”

Gotcha 

You can bite and choke me though

“For real?”

Yes, Guidry. I’m cool with that; spanking, and to some degree, restraint.

“Oh baby, you gonna have the time of your life.”

And another thing.

“Yes?”

I am loud, and it ain’t always cute, especially if i’m enjoying it.

“Bae, I’m trying to put you in a position where you NEED aftercare. I don’t expect it to be cute.”

Speaking of, what is a typical aftercare routine for you?

“ simple shit.Take you to the toilet, sit with you while you pee.  Run you a shower, help clean you up. I’ll carry you if I have to. I’m a cuddler so, after I feel like you’re situated, I’ll clean up and cuddle you for a while. I might fall asleep, if I don’t within the hour; you can expect waffles to be made. But that is the least I would do.”

I want somewhere closer to the most you can do.

“Then you can’t fall asleep or I can do some of it during or before we fuck.”

Okay , I'm cool with that.

I’ll be honest, having this conversation with him right now, was definitely making me horny and in times like this, I am very grateful that I was born a woman. I have no doubt in my mind that if we were next to each other right now, he would be able to smell how badly I wanted to fuck him.  Just thinking about it, my thighs clenched together and I felt that familiar tingle in my stomach. He didn’t help any with his hair falling into his face, licking his lips and kissing at me. The rest of that date, I was going back and forth with mindfulness and imagining what he would feel like inside of me. What his tongue and fingers felt like. What he sounds like when he moans, is he a hard or soft dom. What does he say, if anything while he’s having sex. Just then, I decided to ask. 

Jehraye.

“Yes, ma’am”

Do you talk during sex?

“Yes, I do. I talk, moan, cuss, I might say something in french.

You speak French?

A little, 

“Oh okay. I might make it my goal to hear some of that from you.

“ You get some French outta me, we locked in. the last person I did that with, we was together for 3 years.”

That ain’t THAT long .

“When you 17, yes it is.”

Fair point.

I don’t know why I decided to ask him that knowing it would lead me directly out of mindfulness and into fantasy land. I was still eating and talking but I wasn’t at this date. I was in my bed with this guy I just met three weeks ago, with my face buried into a pillow while he fucked me as I screamed his name in pure ecstasy. Jay must have noticed because when he finally got my attention back he said “ I’m thinking about it too and  I’m bricked the fuck up, baby.”  “Jaaayyy” his name comes out way more lust-filled than I intended.“ When I get ahold of you, you’ll know I meant what I said on our first date at Nana’s.” He says. “ All I ask is that you don’t run from me. If you need me to slow down or stop, that’s fine. But DO NOT RUN.” “Why not?” I ask. “ It aggravates me and I'm gonna want to punish you for it.” “How come?” “ cause if we fucking, you wanted this dick. So,  unless you say “stop” or I feel like I'm hurting you, you taking EVERY inch I got.” “Damn, It’s like that Jay 🙃?” I say. He comes back with “Ion get in no pussy I don’t wanna be in.”

At that moment,  I wanted this man more than I have the past few weeks. We talked some more about our personal “Do’s and Don'ts” of sex, and by the time this date was over, Jay had put his hair back up, I was wishing that I wore underwear.  Maybe it was best that I didn’t. I’m not a fan of that cold shit  hitting my pussy when I pull my underwear back up.  Our date continues on and we finish our food. We stay on facetime for the rest of the night, of course we fell asleep on the phone. This time though I didn’t hang up and awoke to see Jay getting dressed. I watched him for a few minutes before saying “Good morning.” He looked at the camera and said “good morning bae.” 

Uh uh, where you going?

“ 🙂I’m taking my nieces out for a lil bit of fun today.”

awwwww , what are ya’ll gonna do?

“They wanna go to the trampoline park and the movies.”

Okay, what are ya’ll gonna watch?

“They wanna see Tiana's Place”

Oh okay, I saw a few commercials for that.

“yeah”

Why y'all leaving so early though?

“So I can catch the matinee, These girls are pricey.”

You shouldn’t be worried about that.

“What you mean?”

The way you did and were willing to spend on me in Nola…

“Yea, now Imagine that on a slightly smaller scale, times three.”

Yep. Baby catch that matinee 

Exactly 😂that, on top of gas and feeding them whatever they wanna eat when one of em, wants crumbl cookie and  subway; the other one gonna want wendy’s but, a blizzard from sonic and the baby, she aint eating nothing that ain’t a 6pce nugget happy meal with apple slices and a mcflurry wit extra oreos. 

Ohhh with the way you spend money, you must be a damn popular Dentist.

“I make good money but I also have a roommate so I can save a bit more.”

Oh okay. Good Well, Imma let you go so you can enjoy your day with your nieces.

“Aht aht.”

What?

“When did we start hanging up without kisses?”

I blow a kiss at the phone and Jay says “Thank you” and hangs up. 

My Friday was pretty laid back. Until it wasn’t. My client went into an early labor, so I turned off Law & Order and made my way to North Augusta. When I got there I was the only part of her birthing team present. Because she hadn’t called anyone else yet. She’s one of the patients I offer free advice and to some degree birthing services to, as part of my program where I help young single mothers cope with, prepare for  and assist during birth. Despite this being her second time giving birth, she was terrified. I could see it in her eyes. She feared the pain, the uncertainty and a second breech birth. About five minutes after I got there we made calls to the rest of her birthing team, and set up the pool. 

We sat her in it and talked through the contractions and tried to keep her calm until it was time for her to push.  I held her hand, and fed her some strawberries and ice chips while she focused on breathing and pushing. About 3 hours later Her son had started to crown. When we told her, she started crying. This baby wasn’t breech and maybe this labor would be easier. Forty-five minutes after that baby  Eanion Ahzi  Rivers was born. He was so adorable.  We got him cleaned up and I stayed for a few hours after and took care of the baby while she rested.   I Picked my phone up and saw I had 2 missed calls from Jay. Eanion’s mama was a wake so I stepped out to return bae’s calls.

“You musta been sleep.”

No. I just helped deliver a baby a few hours ago.

“For real! How’d it go? Are mama and the baby okay?”

Yes, She had a little boy.

“Awwww. How are you doing though?”

I’m fine, we were prepared for a breech birth but he came out head first and he is the chubbiest lil thing you ever did see. How was the day with ya nieces?

“ listen, next time, they can’t get the Aux.”

Why?

“I fuck with Gracie’s corner but, I wanna hear some Akeem ali, Russ, D4L, Ludacris or something while i’m driving .”

 Jay, you don’t wanna know what sound the letter makes 😂?

“Hell no, I’m outta school shit 😂”

Well, It seems like you had just as good of a day as I did.

“I did. I love spending time with my nieces and nephews. I’m their favorite uncle.”

I bet you are. You’re definitely one of my favorite people.

“Awwwww, you mean that?”

Yeah.

“Aight, then sit on my face when I get to Augusta.”

JEHRAYE

“ALANI”

GUIDRY

“Quit calling me by my government like that.”

Well what do you want me to call you ?

“Jumbo dick Jay”

OMG you-

“I’m bullshiting. It ain’t that big. It’s just right for the body it's attached to.”

I bet. When are you gonna book your flight?

“Next week.”

Good, that way I can set my schedule up right. How long do you plan on staying?

 “Two days.”

Okay.

“Yeah, clear that schedule.”

I will.

After that she had to go back and attend to her client. I went to hang out with Kieran and Asa. Asa, my best friend since middle school and  the one who leaves me stranded on these road trips is a High School AP Calculus teacher. Kieran, my best friend since junior year of college and now  roommate, is an HR consultant. Asa has always wanted to be a teacher. Despite the pay and us trying to convince him to at least go into the college sector, loves what he does. He had a hard time with math when we were little and it frustrated him so, he decided he was gonna do what he had to. He wanted math to come almost as easy to  him as English and history did, and he made it happen. This nigga is one of the smartest people I know and he deserves every praise he gets. He’s worked hard for it.  Kieran on the other hand, Is married; well was married to Toni and they have a 4 year old son together. My Godson Kieran Jamez “KJ” Landry Jr. He always had a thing for Toni so, when they started dating, she became his girlfriend and I became both of their friends and  the third wheel. And despite going through a divorce; which I think is stupid because they clearly still love and want each other; these motherfuckas are hard headed and are hurting because  they tryna teach eachother lessons.  But I can’t force them together.  Me and the guys hang out for a few hours and then we head to our respective homes. I get in, Call Alani, we talk for awhile and I go to sleep.

PT 1

[lessyandmina]

Alright guys, the moment we all been waiting for (even though nobody asked). ANYWAY!! Bruce Wayne is finally gonna get his on my skit, but Selina would probably have to save his neck. You'll see. (It's been 4 months since I have this part begging to be let out. This is all your fault, Bruce!!!) Enjoy everyone. 😉

Me: *Side-eyed Bruce Wayne this time while Jerome is laughing his ass off at us in the background*

Jeremiah: *covering his mouth and trying his hardest not to laugh*

Bruce:

*trying his best not laugh as well, knowing damn well that he's about to get cussed out.* Okay, now hear me out -

Me: NO!!

Jerome:

Jeremiah: *Starts snorting and giggling, still covering his mouth.*

Bruce: Oh, come on!!! I thought you would like this one!!

Me: I get Jerome and Jeremiah because they love to torment me with Sonic 06 and Remorses(Aka Sonic forces). But YOU!!!! I EXPECT MORE FROM YOU, BRUCE!!! YOU'RE THE ABSOLUTE WORST!!! YOU FUCKING ASSHAT!!! WHY WOULD YOU ASSUME THAT I LIKE THIS GARBAGE?!

Jerome: *Starts to recover from laughing* Brucie, come on, man. She likes a lot of sonic games. THIS AIN'T ONE OF THEM!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Selina: Bruce, I told you that she didn't like it, but no. You thought you were going to give it the benefit of the doubt. I can save you from her beating, but I can't save you from her roasting your ass.

Jeremiah: Oh, that reminds me. Bruce, darling, you owe me $50. 😏😉

Bruce: Damn it. I was hoping that you forgot about it. *Gave Jeremiah $50*

Jeremiah: Oh, dear heart. I never forget. *Takes it from Bruce*

Jerome: HA! BRUCIE LOST THE BET!!

Me: I'm sorry, what now? What bet?

Five: Bruce and Jeremiah made a bet not too long ago about the game. If your reaction was good, Jeremiah owed Bruce $50. But if your reaction was bad, like now, Bruce owed Jeremiah $50. So, of course, Bruce lost.

Me: 🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️I can't believe you two!!!

Jerome: Come on, it's really funny how it turned out. 🤣🤣🤣

Selina: Good thing that I save you from Bruce's torture. So I got you this:

Me: Selina, did I ever tell you that I love you?

Selina:

A million more, bestie. A million more. 😉

Jerome: Now hold the fuck up!!! How the hell did give her the good game?! 😡

Selina: Cause unlike you three, I've known her great taste in games. *Looks at me* Remember when you and I played Mortal Kombat?!

Me: Oh shit. How can I forget? You killed it with Mileena, Selina. There's a new one coming out in September.

Selina: Well, consider this as your birthday present.

Bruce: Then I would have Alfred set up a mortal kombat party at Wayne Manor in September.

Me: That's very sweet of you, Bruce. Thank you.

Bruce: You're welcome. But now you gotta play Sonic Boom.

Jerome: *Starts laughing again*

Me: *Bombastic Side-eyed. Criminal offensive Side-eyed* You're still a asshat, Bruce.

Bruce: I'll bring you extra large coffee.

Me: Not gonna happen, Wayne.

Bruce: Extra large French vanilla coffee from Dunkin Donuts.

Me: *Side-eyed Selina once more, then looks back at Bruce* Two extra large.

Bruce: Okay, deal.

Selina: You've drove a hard bargain on that one, Bruce.

Jeremiah: That's one of the reasons why I love him.

Jerome: Sap.

Jeremiah: Amy Rose lover.

Jerome: You better take that back, Miah!! I'm Team Princess Sally all the way and you know it!!

Jeremiah: Now we both know that's not true.

Five: At least none of us are team Elise.

Selina: Thank goodness for that. I feel sorry for those who are.

Me: *Scoffs* I'm not. They're gonna get what they deserve.

Jerome: Yep, cause it's no use!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Jeremiah:

Jeremiah: I prefer Shadow over Silver anyway.

Me: 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[dandylion240]

Jonah’s gaze swept over the guests “should we be worried?”

“No. He’s not a bad kid,” Cecil put a reassuring arm around Jonah’s shoulders. “He’s a bit more animalistic than me, but not all dragons have a chance to be raised in a community. He seems to make your friend Cory happy.”

Jonah’s eyes sought out Cory and smiled “Cory does seem happy.” In the past he had wondered if he had made a mistake in choosing Ethan over Cory. Cory would have seen to it that he had everything he needed but it wouldn’t have been love. It would have been safe. 

Cecil added “I’ve asked Jayden to order more pizzas so that Miah doesn’t attack the cake before we have a chance to cut it.”

“Good thinking,” Jonah chuckled. “He is eyeing it suspiciously. I think Cory has tied his foot to the table to make him sit still. I think he’s sulking now. I almost feel sorry for him.” He leaned in close, giving Cecil a soft peck on the cheek “I can’t wait to marry you.”

“Only a few more minutes,” Cecil let out a few melodic chirps in response.

[lollo-sw-br]

SW: Winglia AU: Shadow 1 (introduction): The Rise of the Winglis

Years ago - Close to Wind Forest

Dierah was in Wind Forest when a young woman appeared sad and thoughtful about something, it was about a member of the Super Wings.

- Ah Jimbo, I so wanted you to be valued like the popular Super Wings but unfortunately it's not because of the arrogance of the popular members - said the young woman - They must pay! You and the Lesser Known Super Wings Need Justice!

Dierah seeing the frustration of the young woman went to her.

- Do you want justice for the Super Wings? Do not want? - said Dierah - Mainly to Jimbo, her favorite.

- Yes, I want to - said the young woman - Popular Super Wings Have Succumbed to Arrogance and Power, This must end!

- Then follow my voice - said Dierah leading her to Wind Forest.

Arriving there Dierah appeared to the young woman

- Hello young lady - said Dierah - my name is Dierah the witch and I can help you

- My name is Miah and How can you do this? - asked Miah - How will you help me do justice to rare Super Wings?

- That way! - said Dierah and a black cloud covered Miah and turned her into a ghost

- What happened? I turned into a ghost! - said Miah - why did you do that?

- You were too naive, now only your favorite Super Wing can get you out of this curse! - said Dierah - But it won't help if nothing, the popular Super Wings are the maximum evolution, the rare ones are disposable for them now

- Please don't tell me I'll be like this for the rest of my life - Miah said desperately - Rare Super Wings need fans like me to help out!

- In the morning you will be a normal person, but at night you will be exactly as you are now and this Forest will be your hiding place until dawn. - said Dierah - Don't worry, I'll bring friends super wings fans so you don't feel alone, Plus rare Super Wings don't care about useless fans like you

- You are a very cruel person! - said Miah - You hurt fans of rare and less popular Super Wings, at what price? Rares Super Wings need fans!

- It doesn't matter to you, I'll do whatever I can to get revenge on the Super Wings, Rare or Popular it doesn't matter, I'll take them down - said Dierah - attacking rare Super Wings fans

- I will not allow it! - said Miah

- You can't do anything - said Dierah - you are trapped in this curse

- I will break free! - said Miah - and I will stop you!

- We shall see - said Dierah - enjoy your time like ghost

The villain is gone leaving Miah destined to live this double life, by day a normal person, but by night she will be a ghost. miah

Dierah had turned other young fans into Winglis, Miah became queen and was willing to punish the popular Super Wings for their arrogance, and thus will give the justice that the rarer Super Wings need

At the moment - World Aircraft

Jett was reunited with Dizzy, Jerome, Paul and Donnie who had a story about the Winglis, but for Donnie and the others, they were just an internal legend, but little did they know that it was actually true.

- The Winglis are fans who have been turned into the ghosts of lesser known Super Wings and to do them justice, they punish the most popular by making them dance the night away. - said Donnie - They normally live during the day, and when night falls, their ghostly form is revealed and another night begins.

- They scare - said Jett - but they are unfortunately right, sometimes because of our arrogance, we overshadow the less popular Super Wings and this payment is a form of alert for us

- Jett's right - said Dizzy - we shouldn't let fame go to our heads

- That's why we must treat everyone with equality and respect - said Paul

- Ah, that's a lie - said Jerome - are you going to trust an internal legend of ours? Oh what a joke! I see no reason to believe that

- Believe if you want Jerome - said Paul - soon the consequences will come, then you will believe in us

- Said it all Paul - said Jett

Jerome didn't know it wouldn't take long for him to change his mind

[wannabecoyote]

"Hey Michael? You've been staring at me.”

"Oh shit. Sorry dude, you're just really fucking pretty."

"That's sappy and also gay as fuck,"

"I'm gay as fuck." Michael says, turning his head to look more intensely at Jeremy. "And I'll be as sappy as I fucking want. I love you. Shut up."

Jeremy groans and covers his face with his hands. Hoping Michael doesn't see the blush taking over.

High Michael is too much for his poor heart.

"Fuck you too." He says against his palms. "Love you too."

He whispers it. He half hopes Michael hears. Half hopes Michael knows.

But Michael is already focused on his weird documentary. His brief but intense moment of affection forgotten in favour of jellyfish.

Just his luck. He loses to fucking sea jello. They don't even have brains!

He's brought out of his internal jellyfish slander when he feels Michael's arms wrap around him. He turns and his face is so close to Jeremy's one small insane decision is all it takes for them to touch.

"You're so soft, Miah. How'd you get to be so soft? How'd you get to make me feel so warm?”

It's nothing more than intoxicated ramble for Michael. It's nothing more than drunk ramblings of his best friend high off his poison of choice. It's nothing more than a small addition to the massive ache he caries for Michael.

He forces a laugh. Don't lean away, you'll upset him. Don't lean in, you'll hurt yourself.

"I don't know, Micha. I think you've had enough," he says and reaches over to snuff out Michael's blunt.

It takes him two breathes to get over the need to kiss Michael's pout of his lips.

"You don't let me do this when I'm not high," he says, leaning against Jeremy's shoulder like he's agonizing over Jeremy's hesitance to let Michael touch him when he's sober.

"You don't want to do this when you're high," Jeremy answers with patience. His eyes are on the tv and honestly jellyfish are actually entertaining and interesting actually.

He's not at all struggling to focus on the jellyfish when Michael is breath against his shoulder is blowing down his neck.

"That's not true at all! I wanna hug you all the time! I want cuddles! I want homoerotic subtext! I want homoromanticism!”

He's going to die. Jeremy is going to die and it's because Michael is fucking adorable. He's done for.

"I don't think homoromanticism is a word, Micha."

He says I read because what do you say to that.

"Whatever, you don't want romantic relations with me anyway. You're so straight, Jer."

"I'm not straight, Michael. And I would like romantic relations with you. Very much so. Except you're high and unable to consent and you don't actually want this."

"Ask me tomorrow."

"What? No! You ask me! I don't want to breach this when you're sober! Do it yourself, I'm not sabotaging our friendship for shit."

"I just told you I want romantic relations, Jer."

"So ask me. When you're sober. Tomorrow."

"Will you say yes?"

"Are you fucking kidding me? If you ask me while sober I'll kiss you senseless!”

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Naturally Jeremy stayed the night and slept in. Michael woke up before him. They were still intertwined, Michael has obviously not let go throughout the night. He's still holding on to Jeremy.

Memories of last night hits him slowly. Like the rays of the rising sun. It's slow and warm and golden when it unfurls in his chest.

He runs out to make breakfast for them. Breakfast in bed was a good asking out gift right?

"Dude, it's so fucking early where are you going?”

"Uh... I'm just gonna pee, Jer. I gotta pee, my guy."

"Eugh, mmmhh, okay but I want cuddles. Give me cuddles. Wash your hands!”

Jeremy is already half back to sleep when he moved to stand up again. Fuck, he's too adorable.

He makes quick work of pancakes with slightly shaky hands. Never had pancakes been given a bigger responsibility. They have to be as good as Michael can make them.

They turn out okay. Anything bad can be covered with chocolate syrup and Hot Chocolate.

When he comes back to his room Jeremy is laying curled where he was grasping Michael's pillow close to him.

"Hey, Jer? Jer, buddy. I made you pancakes, dude." He lifted his tray a little as if Jeremy could see it. "Also I made you hot choccy cause you are a fucking baby."

"Fuck you," Jeremy says already sitting up. He looks soft and warm and content.

Michael wants to devour him. Wants to see if he's as warm as he looks under his tongue. Wants to know if he's as soft as he seems between his teeth. Michael wants to lap up his contentment and stroke it bigger and brighter.

"Mmhh, maybe later." He murmurs, unheard.

"Also I love you, thank you , I love you." He's mostly asleep still but the warmth of the Hot Chocolate has made him more pliant. More receptive.

Well, Michael hopes so, anyway.

"I love you too," he sits beside Jeremy and leans to kiss his cheek. Red flushes through his face. "So what do you think about romantic relations? With me?"

"I — I didnt think you'd remember that."

"You said you'd kiss me senseless. You promised and yet here I stand, unkissed and still with my senses about me,” he waves a hand at the space between them. There's barely any of it.

"Are you asking me out?”

"Yeah, duh. Jeremy, I made you breakfast in bed."

"I thought you were just being nice," he says and leans closer. Looking at Michael and asking with his eyes for permission.

Michael gives the tiniest nod. Fearing that if he moves too much this moment might flee from him.

Jeremy connects their lips. Hesitant at first. Asking, inquiring. When he gets his answer, he draws Michael in deeply. His hands on Michael's face, pulling him deeper and deeper.

Jeremy's lips are warm and soft and oh so desperate. Michael can feel his senses leaving him.

There's lips and tongues and teeth and desperate pulling and yanking and moaning.

When they pull away Jeremy is looking pleased to see Michael in a daze.

"How's that for senseless kissing?"

[your-nanas-house]

Oh that is such a mean event Jerome vs Jeremiah girl ahhhh how am I supposed to choose 😢

I like them both in different ways cuz they're very different from each other. I do think jerome would be a little more/ a lot more soft hearted towards his s/o but I do think he would irritate me quite a bit and hes reckless like actually reckless whereas jeremiah puts more thought into his shenanigans so your more likely to get into some type of disaster with jerome than with jeremiah.

Pre spray/ sane jeremiah 10/10 not interested 😂

Pre matricide jerome 10/10 love the guy 💖 psycho jerome 10/10 love the guy💖

Crazy gas Jeremiah 10/10 love the guy 💖 (but hey we have Jerome to thank for him)

I think if (as evidenced by the ecco situation) if it were convenient for Jeremiah he'd toss you aside easily and think he's done you some kind of favor even allowing you to have existed in his presence. Jerome, though, if you love him and have stayed by his side boy would not throw you away for anything, he definitely wouldn't give up his lifestyle for you or change his ways but he would absolutely not kill you or let anyone else kill you, i think he'd respect you more as a person whereas to jeremiah you'd always just be replaceable property that should consider itself lucky that he even gives you the time of day

The angst with Jerome would be perfect

The vulnerable soft moments with Jeremiah would be perfect

Plus Jeremiah is kind of prettier I mean his fashion sense is impeccable and his face isn't held on by staples or stitches 😂

Jeremiah is also a tad more frightening which shouldn't be a bonus but hey the soft comfort from him after he's 'accidentally' scared you 😍

You could have actual conversations with Jeremiah about normal stuff he might not care but he'd still understand you

Jerome would not care for boring tedious small talk-y sane people conversation

This so hard, I want them both but at the same time I don't want anything to do with either of them 😂

Sorry for the rant hahaa uhh for the activity thing horror movie marathon in a blanket fort?

(Yo they would both be seriously good at making blanket forts!!)

First of all don't worry, I'm happy to read your thoughts, second of all you read my mind..literally, wow. 😱

I agree with you on everything. 😌

I also think that Jerome is the one with a little bit softer heart of the twins, maybe because of the past or I don't know, maybe it's not even like that but I like to think that; his attitude might be annoying to some people but also Jeremiah's in some ways. 🤔

I also agree with your thoughts about what a relationship with them would be like, Miah feeling superior and Jerome considering the fact that you are on his side. 🥺

I think you can also have short conversations with Jerome, maybe not like Jeremiah and maybe not even that sane. I like to think that it happens completely at random, no matter what you're doing Jerome's mind travels and then he opens his mouth and you find yourself momentarily confused about his question or the topic he started talking about because it came out completely at random. 😂

Now that I think about it maybe they' re not short conversations because Jerome seems to me like someone who talks a lot and that likes to be heard so he might start a monologue at the least convenient times and he would continue even if you are not listening like for example at night, maybe he would be silent for a few minutes after you say good night and then he would start talking about a topic like 'is jam good if you put it on a chicken? ' and he would start talking for hours while you want to sleep but you can't because he wants you to answer him so if you don't you might get hit by his elbow that wakes you up for sure or your name repeated until you open your eyes and answer him. 🤣

And yes, they would both be good at building a blanket fort, Jeremiah's all planned and Jerome's made randomly but it would still work. 😂🤔

[riickgrimes]

Do you not think belly actively choosing jere over Conrad (knowing Conrad was still into her) taints their relationship for s3? I feel like they’ll make Jeremiah’s choice to break up too (if they stick with bonrad endgame)

Interesting question. Honestly I don’t think it taints anything. For one, as far as Belly knows Conrad took back what he said about still wanting her, so in her mind either he didn’t mean it when he said that he wanted her, or he just doesn’t know what he wants, so that’s why she felt fully comfortable in her decision to be with Jer*miah. Granted, she had already made her decision to be with him anyway, but and which brings me to my second point, I think a large part of Belly deciding to be with Jer*miah was out of fear or getting hurt by Conrad again. I think that’s why she was so upset when Conrad took what he said back, bc it hurt and it’s exactly what she thought he’d do if she let him back in, so she felt totally confident in her decision.

And for me personally, I don’t think it taints bellyconrad at all bc I don’t give Belly’s feelings for Jer*miah any credibility. Her feelings for him imo are so wrapped up in guilt (from hurting him when she chose Conrad and “abandoning” him after Susannah) and fear (over getting hurt by Conrad again), that I just don’t see any actual feelings for him. In my eyes, they’re barely even a real couple, just a point of conflict for Conrad and Belly. So like to me, that relationship affects bellyconrad but only in the sense that it affects Belly and Conrad as individual characters, not their relationship or them as a couple, if that makes sense.

[how-the-light-gets-in]

i can't believe i'm back here again.

what is it about me that draws in the same broken souls over and over again?

it was miah. it was matthew ryan. it was him. and now it's you.

i am trying so hard to believe that you're just lost for a moment, stuck in the fog in an empty street. i'm trying so hard not to stare at my phone. i'm trying so hard not to ask you if this is already over, even though you promised me so many times that you'd never hurt me and never leave.

and everyone wants to talk about what i deserve. i know i deserve you and you deserve me. we both deserve what we've felt for 7 weeks (how has it only been 7 weeks???? time doesn't follow any rules when it comes to you). i know this connection isn't going to just fade away without a care. do you?

i wasn't even remotely present today. my son barely saw my face because it was buried in my phone, reading and re-reading the same old texts. what i wouldn't give to get one now. just a simple "i miss you" or "when can i see you" or "can i come over." it would change everything.

but instead, everything feels gray. it's like whatever has its hold on you has now transferred to me, like you breathed it into me with your last kiss, which was noticeably abrupt and free from passion.

so which is it? are you the one i've known for two months or the new person who's taken his place for the past four days? i know, i just heard it myself. it's only been four days.

i wish we'd never made plans for you to stay over this weekend. i hate the idea of asking you if you're still coming when it seems impossible that you'll say yes. i wish my friends weren't coming into town in a week and expecting me to be happy, and expecting to meet you. what am i supposed to tell them? everything fucking hurts to think about.

not that it would help, but i wish you'd at least say it's not me.

and the guilt i feel is overpowering. i thought i was better than this? i thought i was past this? how quickly everything comes rushing back — those same feelings of insecurity, the fears of abandonment, the pain in my stomach when i think about starting over yet again. i thought i was healed? i thought i was good? and now it's all the same.

[now-we-say-c0ral]

January 10, 2014

Slept for 10 hours, I think. Woke up with a full bladder. I’m still craving for more sleep but I really have to get going now. Caught the train just in time and got to work at 8am. I was assigned in TH15 with Ate Imelda and my baby girl Ate April. It’s been a good, busy shift. I just did 1 lap and a fistula repair. This day took forever because 1 patient had 3 joint procedures. Otherwise, the day was pretty uneventful. Again, I’m learning so much from Ate Imelda. She’s been such a good support and a good ate to me. I really appreciate that.

Went to get a smoothie and went to the gym after. I did chest, triceps, and some abs. It was a bit difficult doing the sets while doing chest. I was okay with them last week now it’s been a but difficult trying to finish them. I did finish the sets but I wasn’t happy with the way I was lifting. No matter. Winter blues is the one to blame.

Got home at 8:45pm and cooked my tuna cat food dish for tomorrow. I have to apply for a Band 6 position in Kingston just to piss off one person. I have to do it by tomorrow because it’ll be closing on the 12th. It’s been an okay day. 2 more days and then I’ll finally have the weekend for some ME time.

January 9, 2024

This weather is literally not doing me any good and I’m having an even harder time waking up. I got to work a bit late but it’s fine because it’s our protected teaching day. It’s boring. Another “what to do in a fire” seminar. Lateral exit my ass. I’m going out of the damn hospital.

I was assigned in TH12 with Ate Imelda and our new HCA Miah. It’s been an okay day. I’m learning so much from Ate Imelda. She’s a god-sent, really. In the afternoon, Janefer was with us so it was even more fun. A lot of gossip and shenanigans are bound to happen whenever we’re together. I did one lap case and learned how to use the Olympus when we’re doing OGDs. It’s been honestly a real good experience especially when you’re with people who support your learning. NMCs emailed me that I should do my revalidation really soon. I honestly don’t know how to do it since it’s my first time. It’s going to be an interesting weekend for me trying to sort this shit out. I’m really done with paperworks at this point in my life and I’m only 28 years old. Honestly, it takes the life out of me.

I didn’t go to the gym today because 1. My body’s just not feeling it and 2. I’m really not in the mood emotionally. I’m just done today. It’s so hard to move in this cold. The only good thing about proceeding is that everyday the sun will set 1 minute later than yesterday and that’s giving me life but I need more motivation now than ever because it’s really difficult. My asian mind and body is just not happy with what we have at the moment.

Got home at 7:45pm. I just slept from 8:30pm.

[adayin-the-life]

January 4th

Dear 2023, is this a joke to you?? Yesterday I thanked you about lifting my cold a bit, and you responded to that by giving me a fever last night?? You had me worried sick I wouldn't be able to do anything for my exams today!! >:( Luckliy, you seem like a prankster of sorts, so my fever only lasted during the night and I slept very well actually, which is nice.

I worked so hard today. I got 6 out of 8 exam tasks done, the 7th task is half-finished as well. Tomorrow I can take my time to finish the remaining two, and give them a last look over before I put them online for my teacher. I feel so productive.

Miah and I cleaned the bathroom together. I promised her last week I would do it but I forgot, then I got sick. She was annoyed it didn't happen and was about to do it all by herself, stating I had other things to worry about. I insisted on helping her, and we got it all done in like half an hour. We quickly compromised over which music to listen to by listening to my Arctic Monkeys playlist, so it's her favourite band, but only the songs I know. I also did some laundry, which made me feel very productive as well.

Dad went to his band's rehearsal room, so we needed to cook for ourselves. Elijah mentioned something being on TV from Eurovision, and that she could record it if we wanted to watch Anubis (which obviously we did), but we all got reminded dad got a new provider for the house and we weren't sure if we could still watch TV. If that wasn't the case, Elijah would follow it online. But luckily, the TV still worked fine so Elijah recorded it and we watched Anubis.

Talking about Anubis... Holy fucking shit. So I guess that new teacher Wolf is the masked person who Victor talks to, right? Miah commented they have the same buttchin and I kinda see it, but I wonder what the bigger part of it would be. Seems like he has the students wrapped around his finger, especially Jerome ever since he gave him that pyramid to fight of his bad dreams (my bb finally getting some sleep like he deserves). Mara left for Dubai, so now it's Noa's time to shine. Honestly? I didn't remember her to be that confident, but I like her. And Jerome, apparently, does too. That boy is completely smitten. I wonder what is going on with the Amulet and him though, why he burned his hand that badly when touching it? Maybe that pyramid-thing from Wolf has something to do with it? Oh yeah, Fabian and Nina have the chicken for science class now - which cockle-doodle-doo's like a FUCKING ROOSTER. It's hilarious.

[awesomefringey]

how much do you wanna bet that louis' sitting at home right now, smacking his head against the countertop going:

"I PHYSICALLY CAN NOT MAKE HIM PREGNANT, I HAVE TRIED, BUT IT DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY, PLEASE STOP TELLING ME I NEED TO GET HIM PREGNANT"

cause it's ALL I'm seeing on my dash (rightfully so, I must say, harry should have all the babies)

It won’t stop Louis from trying, Miah!

When Harry says he feels extra sexy because he maybe possibly ovulated, then Louis WILL give it a try. It’s his damn duty! He vowed it to Harry to never ever stop trying!

[melchron]

Nightmare Time 2 Episode 3 Thoughts

I didn't get a chance to do this last time so I'm doing it now because I really do love these episodes

MIAH?!?!?!?

Can we talk about how good Jaime is at making music videos? This and Where I Wanna Be are amazing

Ok but where did Jaime get those Care Bear plushies? They look like they're from the iteration I grew up with and I want them

Jeff sounds SO good

If I remember correctly, Jaime said that Andrew noticed her nips in the bathtub scene and she had to edit them out. Thank god he caught that omg. And great editing on Jaime's part.

I love how passionate Frank is about Toyzone. He truly cares for this place.

OOOOUuUuUTT!!!

Death to Bezos

This is so TRAGIC!!!! Not Buddy please no!

I wish Miss Retro's was real so bad it feels like the most vibey place ever. This is the type of place teens in 80s movies hang out. Mutuals I want to be teens in 80s movies with.

STAAHP I'M SAAD

Jaime is so good as Sherman

Sugar Gliders seems like something I would have LOVED when I was little. Honestly I'd probably still enjoy it now.

Frank that is weird to say that right in front of Sherman

SHERMAN DON'T SAY THAT

I want his dino bowtie so much

Don't shame me!

Oh hello Lurch Marco

Ok but can we talk about how next episode we see how quickly the CaliforMIA trio had to grow up because of their financial circumstance. Like Sherman isn't wrong in his statement but his thinking behind it is

Call him out Holloway

Frank I love you but that was a douche move. She has mouths to feed at home!

"I'm not going anywhere." Can anyone tell me what foreshadowing is?

Oh uh uh I do not like this. Bad vibes. Bad vibes! Shelia stop that right now. Please don't treat Frank like your servant. Not the black man, you rich white woman.

Oh hi Becky :D

SheLIA WHAT THE HECK HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING

PLEASE HE'S SUFFERED ENOUGH

Why do I want all of Sherman's stuff? Gimme the dino jammies!

YES TELL HER OFF FRANK

WAIT STOP SHERMAN DID NOTHING WRONG! DON'T TAKE HIS STUFF!!

Do you think Sheila's ever gone "Pull the lever, Marco. WRONG LEVER!" Because I do

It's a nightmare TIME. Get it right Frank

BARRY SWIFT!?!?! This name works on multiple levels and I love it. It works as a pun and a Flash reference.

Stop I'm sad again

Two weeks and your done grieving?

I wish rich people would do more cool stuff with their money! They're so boring and stupid. Give me your money if you're not going to use it properly

Oh hello Feast Or Famine

#Barlen #Helry #OTPIAH

The acting skills Frank

This episode is making me miss Toys R Us. Or when I went on my monthly trips to Claire's for Shopkins

I do kinda feel bad for Sherman in all of this. It's not his fault he was raised to believe he deserved his privilege simply because he was born with it. Frank really could've made him better if Shelia allowed him to

Shelia is brutal. She really didn't need to kill Ted

Frank is so good. He meant it when he told Barry that they were both making it out. He really wanted to and tried his best. And him saying sorry to Lex-

M-Make?!

So is Shelia part of the cult herself or does she just have access to it through Sherman's father

"I did." SHE THOUGHT! GET HER!

Frank: 👁👄👁

So like. does he have to get re-enrolled into school or?

Sherman. Babe. I know you're experience with being parented isn't the best but they don't usually do whatever you want them to

Yall Corey killed it. Never did I think I'd care about Frank this much

I LOVE NEEDY BEAST SO MUCH!

THRASH IS SO FUNNY! THIS FIGHT IS SO FUNNY! LITERALLY NO ONE IS DOING ANYTHING

Wait I just remembered the end! Kale's introduction is tragic actually. He just wants to die

Hey! Dennys is for the theater kids! Not the punk rockers!

This flirting is so awkward. They both think they're so edgy. Calm down sweeties

Not the "Hiya, Duke. Thanks for coming." Dblwjhslfnjd so he's that type of dad

I love Duke. He's trying not to overwhelm Rose and trying to make her feel comfortable with him. He's showing he has similar interests and trying to make her laugh and showing her that he'll listen. He's good at his job!

Rose looks like she's trying so hard to hide her fear. She looks so uncomfortable but she has to keep up the punk front. Guys she doesn't care at all trust her

What's wrong with Barbie, Rosarie?

Yo Holloway kinda scary ngl

She read you like a book and ripped you to shreds dang

Rose is adorable

God I forgot how demonic the killer track actually sounded. OOUOUUWAAHAHAHAH Jeff understood the assignment jeez

Shh bby don't think. Eat your pie. Everything's ok

The mess up in blowing out the candle

Duke. My guy. We all have the same knowledge you do.

DUKE! MY GUY! LISTEN TO HER!

Why doesn't he just like. move?

This must've been the craziest night for Rose. She met a witch and is now (in her eyes) responsible for her death

KITTY! So much pet lore this season

What??

Duke: :0

CAME TO HATCHETFIELD FROM WHERE?!?!???

Aww she keeps telling him even though she knows he'll never remember :(

Dude that's so much smoke!

HAILEY-

Wait why does she have honey for that?

Ted let me see you be kinder to your brother first and then we'll see about your own kids

POTSEED!!

THRASH IS SO FUNNY! I LOVE HIM AND COURTNEY! I LOVE THEIR VOICES!

Kale kinda cute ngl

Yes 👏👏 the character arc we needed. They're done being try-hard edgelords

Kale does not seem like he's strong enough to punch her that hard. Did the killer track give you super strength? I'm guessing since he also knocked out the audio guy

Skud looks like he has no idea what's going on (and tbf no one does). Thrash is stressed out of his mind. Needy Beast is funny

This music video is so great!!!!!

Noooo I don't want Kale to die :( I wanted him to get help!!

Rose: 👁👄👁

Holloway!!! Letting him have his moment of glory

This is SO. TRAGIC. Holloduke is tragic guys

Soooo what kind of potential do we have with Holloway Holiday working at Hannah's school?

I LOVE THIS VERSION OF THE THEME SO MUCH! I recorded the end of it back in November and I love listening to it every once in a while. The. Vibes. Also Irish Becky is back!

[dandylion240]

Taking Miah’s hand beneath the table he gave it a squeeze. “Damn,” he muttered beneath his breath “give me the phone. While we eat I’ll figure out where to go once we leave.” He should have known the news of their arrival would have reached the old man. “We’ll have to take turns keeping guard. I have a feeling nowhere is going to be safe as long as we’re here.”

“Okay…” 

Nehemiah nodded, handing Cory the phone. They looked back again, watching as the person who had alarmed them walked out of the restaurant. As they watched a waiter came with their orders, giving them a polite smile.

“Pizza!” 

[ttuesday]

Hello! How would the gang members react to their s/o asking to eat them out? 👀

Alrighty I’ll be real with u, I was so confused with this cause I didn’t know who was supposed to be eating out who ;-;

I did it so it’s the gang member eating out the SO but if I’ve gotten this completely wrong pls just let me know <3

Arthur

Arthur doesn't think he's worthy to date you nevermind go down on you. But if it's what you want then Arthur will try his absolute best. Of course he mumbles "Don't be expecting much" and "I ain't really great at this" and a few other things like that.

But that does NOT reflect his skill. Arthur may not be confident in his ability but he's just being modest. He gets into a good rhythm, pays attention to what you like the most and isn't afraid to use his hands too.

Every noise you make encourages him to keep going and Arthur won't stop until you're fully satisfied. Afterwards, Arthur's a little surprised at how well that went. Honestly he expected himself to fuck it up somehow.

Charles

Charles is a very giving person so it doesn't take long for him to go down on you when y'all get into a relationship. He takes his time, making sure to appreciate every part of your body before finally settling in between your legs.

Charles knows exactly what he's doing so you don't need to worry about giving him any instructions. All you have to do is enjoy, which is pretty easy to do when you've got his mouth on your ~sensitive parts~

He is so goddamn dedicated to your pleasure, this man won't stop until you've came at least twice. Someone pls give him a gold medal cause he is E L I T E.

Dutch

Dutch likes it when you ask him. There's just something about you asking him to touch you and go down on you that really strokes his ego.

He rents a hotel room so ye can really make a night of it. Dutch strives off making things as intimate and sensual as possible so there’s a chance he might suggest you wear a blindfold or use some rope to make things more interesting.

Dutch edges you so goddamn much. He knows exactly what he's doing with his mouth but he won't let you finish until you're practically screaming his name.

Micah

This isn't exactly Micah's speciality. He's used to being the one receiving, not the one giving. But he does like you a lot so he's willing to give it a go. Micah won't admit this to you but at first he's a little intimidated. He knows you're good with your mouth but now he has to show his skill.

You can tell he doesn't have as much skill in this area as he'd like to admit but he definitely puts a lot of effort into it. With a little guidance from you, Miah starts to get the hang of it.

Turns out, Micah actually likes going down on you. He surprises himself with how much he gets you to moan and whimper by just using his mouth. It is a massive ego boost and he loves to tease you for as long as possible. Micah regrets not trying it sooner, he had no idea it'd be so much fun.

John

When you bring this up to John, it's when you're both out scouting a job. It's the only time alone you've had with him all day so you took the opportunity to talk to him about it. He raises his eyebrows and glances around "Right here? Now?".

Honestly if you want him to go down on you straight away then John has no problem doing that. It's actually a big turn on for him and it'll definitely make scouting more interesting than he'd thought it would be.

John really focuses when he goes down on you, making sure he catches every little thing that makes you moan or arch your back. When you grip his hair and apply some pressure, John instantly groans which makes the whole thing so much better.

Javier

Javier's excited. He talks himself up, promising you a night of pure bliss. He's a little nervous that he won't live up to expectations but he knows you and what makes you squirm so he thinks he'll be fine.

He's very generous and is quick to study your reactions to see what you like best. Javier is living his best life when his mouth is getting to work on you.

Afterwards, he showers you in compliments. Javier holds you as he tells you all about how beautiful you looked moaning his name.

Sean

Sean is ready whenever you are. He doesn't have a lot of skill or experience but he loves making you feel good. Honestly he's shocked he hasn't done this yet but he's confident he'll make it up to you.

He's very eager and doesn't hold back. Sean doesn't really know what he's doing so if you tell him to focus on a certain area or touch another part of you too, Sean does it without question.

When he starts to feel his length harden, Sean might start to go faster because he wants to get his own release soon too but just give him a few more orders and he'll settle down again. Oh and if you tug at his hair too harshly, he'll stop what he's doing to quickly complain before getting back to work.

Hosea

C'mon now we all know Hosea's got experienced so he knows the basic techniques to please you.

Not only that but Hosea likes to keep track of what really gets you going in general so he already knows what he should incorporate into it.

Hosea loves the idea of going down on you and honestly it's probably one of the first ~activities~ y'all do.

This man has the power to make you come within 2 goddamn minutes. He definitely has a talented mouth.