#this took me so long ffs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jtl-fics · 1 year

Text

Fluent Freshman - Part 35

"Andrew, wake up." Andrew felt a hand on his shoulder and he lashed out as he always did. He found himself rocketing towards consciousness as he heard Neil's pained grunt. Panic lances through him as he realizes what he had hit instead of the intruder and he's glad they compromised when he and Neil had started to sleep in the same bed.

Andrew pulls Neil in closer to protect him even as Neil groans at the sudden jolting movement.

He needs to get-

"I already moved your secret pillow knife Andrew." The intruder says as Andrew's hand grasps at nothing. He has a second one but the intruder is now armed and Neil-

"Erik and the Hans Moretti Sword Box are the only combination of me, another guy, and blades being stabbed at me that I will accept. Now, wake up." The familiar sounding intruder says.

Andrew blinks awake.

Nicky's frowning face is staring down at him.

"I need to borrow the Maserati, or you need to drive me to Abby's house. Right now." Nicky says without a hint of the fear.

Or, at least, not fear of Andrew.

"What's wrong with Smith?" he asks holding out his hand for his pilfered knife as he rubs Neil's side where he had lashed out instinctively.

Nicky looks at him for a long moment before handing the knife back to Andrew, "There's...I just feel like something isn't right. I want to be there with him, I shouldn't have left him there." Nicky says.

Andrew didn't disagree.

FF had been relaxed and at ease, drinking the disgusting smoothie that Kevin had forced on him, and Andrew had noticed a hint of a smile on his friend's face.

Then that fuckface showed up and FF had looked worse than when Andrew had stabbed him. He still remembered the garbage that piece of shit had spewed and Andrew hated knowing things about his friend that his friend hadn't told him.

Hated that his brain could piece moments that made a horrible amount of sense now. FF staring at his car the first time before climbing in, how he had requested that Andrew focus on the road, Nicky looking at all of them exasperated "Smithy was going to walk back", and-

“See, you’re still upset over what that guy did. Why are you clinging to the last name of the guy that did this to you?” Fuckface asks from behind them, “He almost killed mom and you. He did kill our two-“

"Stop."

Andrew makes himself stop thinking about it. It wasn't something FF wanted to talk about.

"The keys are where I always put them." he says because he thinks if he gets out of bed he might go hunt fuckface for sport. The thought of seeing fuckface's well fucking face as he hits him with the Maserati is not a bad one.

"Thank you Andrew. Sorry Neil." Nicky says and Neil waves it off having mostly drifted back to sleep as Andrew had rubbed his back mindlessly.

Nicky leaves without another word. Andrew settled back into bed hand still mindlessly rubbing Neil's back. He closes his eyes. He thinks about how FF had looked at those two kids a few weeks back.

He'd looked like a good older brother.

He holds Neil tight, focuses on the feeling of his even breathing on his neck, and listens to Kevin's snoring to think about a monster consuming Daniel whole.

******

Sometimes Matt feels like he misses out on things with his friends. It didn't happen that often and he doesn't regret the Thanksgiving he spent with his Mom and Dan. Not a single atom regrets making hand turkeys with Dan or holding Dan and his Mom's bags during their Black Friday spree.

He still felt ice in his stomach when he heard that some of Nathan's men had come for Neil and that FF had gotten hurt. FF hadn't seemed overly bothered by the injury and Matt was looking forward to having the freshman as a roommate once he was fully cleared by Abby.

FF was a good kid and Matt had a hard time disliking someone who so obviously looked up to and liked his best friend. He'd told Dan about the 'Captain Neil' title and the two of them had just about died talking about how sweet they both found it.

Which is why he feels a certain kind of way when he finds out his Skype date with Dan had him miss out on a face that, based on what he heard from an incensed Aaron, was in desperate need of a punch.

"Where's Nicky?" Matt asks.

"He couldn't stop worrying about Smiths, he doesn't have Friday classes so he mentioned something about sticking with Smiths." Aaron explains over his oatmeal and Matt turns his head towards the wall they shared with Neil, Andrew, and Kevin's room as he hears the blender going. Aaron shovels the remainder of his oatmeal into his mouth, "I gotta go. I'll see you later." he says.

Matt waves his roommate off and wonders what the sudden rush was but it was hardly three minutes later that Kevin Day was bursting into their room without knocking. "Aaron, I need your-" Kevin stops gaze settling on Matt. "Where's Aaron?" he asks.

Matt looks at him, "He just left." he says. Kevin looks to the ceiling in obvious frustration, "Anything I can help with?" Matt asks while at the same time cursing himself for asking.

"Have you had breakfast?" Kevin asks immediately.

"Uh...no?" Matt says.

"Perfect. Drink this." Kevin says shoving a smoothie into Matt's hand. Matt looked at the blue-ish smoothie in his hands and then back up to Kevin. "You asked if there was anything you could help with. Tell me how that tastes." he points at the beverage and Matt recognizes the distinct smell of one of Kevin's health shakes.

"I don't want to do this." Matt says setting the smoothie to the side.

"I'm trying to improve the flavor." Kevin says, "It was brought to my attention that it isn't very...good tasting." Kevin adds sounding like the admission costs him something.

"Just now? You just figured out they taste like butt, just now?" Matt asks incredulously.

Kevin flushes, "Smiths drank it without complaint!" he exclaims.

"Yeah, 'cuz Smithster is nice! Also I think his face is just stuck like that." Matt says.

"There was no way I could have known they were gross!" Kevin argues.

"Kevin, most people TASTE the things they're giving to others." Matt points out and Kevin only grows redder.

"Are you going to help me improve the taste or not?!" Kevin demands pointing at the smoothie, "that's phase one right there." he points at the beverage.

Matt considers it, "This is to make these god awful smoothies taste better for Smithster?" he asks finally feeling like there was something he could offer his friend.

"Yes." Kevin says.

"And you can't just taste them yourself....because?" Matt asks.

"I need multiple datapoints, it can't just be me." Kevin answers immediately.

Matt rolls his eyes but he was not one to deny the scientific process, "Fine." he agrees and grabs the smoothie, "You said this was phase one of improving the flavor?" he asks.

"Yes." Kevin says.

Matt nods and brings the smoothie to his lips.

Bitter. Slimey. Why is it spicy? So Bitter. It's liquid how is it chalky?

He immediately spits it out, "Why does it taste like that?!" Matt demands immediately. "You said it was phase one?!" he hisses.

"That's the control. I needed your opinion on where I was starting." Kevin jerks his head to the side towards the entrance of Matt's dorm, "C'mon, we've got work to do." he says leaving the room without taking his godforsaken smoothie with him.

Matt looks to the ceiling like Kevin had earlier. Honestly, the world had been a darker place since Kevin had to take the required science course last year.

****** There was no singular more 'freshman' thing that FF had done, in Nicky's opinion, than the fact that the kid had early Friday classes. Nicky had gotten to Abby's place late and hadn't slept before, too caught up in a conversation with Aaron.

FF had been awake when he'd gotten to Abby's, staring blankly into the fridge and based on how cold his friend's pajamas were he couldn't help but wonder how long FF had been there. So he herded FF back to bed and FF had pressed his face into Nicky's shoulder and hadn't let go. So Nicky had crawled into bed after FF had nodded his consent.

Nicky had slept terribly.

Still, he woke up with FF's alarm. FF's gaze was about a thousand miles away but he got ready for his two early Friday classes robotically. Nicky shot a text to Aaron and Andrew to let them know that he'd stick with FF for the day to make sure that if Daniel showed up he wouldn't bother FF.

FF walked into a wall as he was texting. "Aw, bud." he says and sets him on a new course.

Andrew texted to tell him that Neil was going to talk with Wymack about not giving Daniel a chance.

He heard another thud, "Oh, Smith don't run into that." he hears Abby say worriedly.

Nicky puts his phone away.

Focus.

He gets FF through breakfast and through the walk to campus. He takes a seat next to FF in his Math class and ignores the narrowed eyes of the person who's usual seat he has obviously taken. He turns in FF's homework, pays attention, takes some notes, answers the clicker questions for FF, and guides him out and over towards his next class.

He sees Daniel being shown around campus by Jack.

He texts Aaron for back-up. The two of them manhandle FF across campus just in time for his Japanese class and Nicky and Aaron swear up and down that they are just there to look in on the class. Nicky hands the clicker off to Aaron since the future doctor's handwriting left a lot to be desired.

Eventually it was done and Nicky and Aaron had to maneuver FF through a truly STARTLING amount of people who wanted to 'have a word' with FF. Nicky remembers that kid from months back. 'The Adonis of the Foreign Language Department'

Eventually through a combination of Nicky's polite declinations, Aaron glowering, and FF walking into another wall they managed to escape the Foreign Language department of Palmetto State University.

"I think we deserve a treat." Nicky says, "Everyone who agrees raise your hand." he adds and raises his own hand before lifting FF's hand up and looking to see Aaron lift his own hand up.

"Are we sure he's okay in there?" Aaron asks waving a hand in front of FF's face as they made their way to an ice cream shop that had excellent waffle cones and was the place that sold FF's favorite triple berry milkshake.

"Yeah, this happens sometimes." Nicky says even if it had never gone on this long with FF having to reboot his system. It feels like his friend may have blue-screened but Nicky's willing to wait it out.

"If you're sure." Aaron says expression giving away how unconvinced he is but he moves along, "Did you do what we talked about last night?" he asks.

"Yeup." Nicky says popping the 'p' at the end.

"Good." Aaron says as he opens the door to the ice cream shop.

****** Andrew is walking to Abby's with Neil, Kevin, and Matt to pick up his car. Nicky had texted Andrew that he and Aaron were hanging out at Abby's trying to get FF to snap out of whatever daze he had fallen into.

"We have to let him tryout and there will be someone from the university there making sure it's all fair." Neil spits the word out with obvious disgust. "Like any of this shit is fair!" Neil kicks a pebble on the sidewalk.

Andrew keeps his thoughts to himself that if Daniel just doesn't make it to the tryouts then there's no issue. This whole mess kicked off because he stabbed FF and Andrew wanted to make it right. FF may not blame Andrew and may still reflexively tell anyone who asks that Romero did it, but Andrew can't forget the moment he looked over and saw his knife in FF's stomach and realized that the blood on his hands was his friend's.

"He might be a good addition to the team." Kevin says.

"Kevin, if you say that one more time I'm going to dump phase 3 down your throat." Matt hisses.

Kevin recoils in visible disgust and notably keeps his mouth shut. Andrew will have to get the recipe off of Matt if it's that effective at shutting Kevin up.

They make the final turn onto Abby's street and Andrew's eyes narrow as he looks at Abby's driveway where there was only one car.

"Where the fuck is my car?" he asks.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

#Fluent Freshman AU #AFTG #AFTG AU #FF - Pt 35 #Fluent Freshman Friday #Ya'll are getting a long one because the Matt POV took me #Jack is showing Daniel around the campus #And the two of them are both growing INCREASINGLY irritated with the other #Because it's two people who can't help but be so far up their own asses #That having to listen to someone be up THEIR own ass? TORTURE.#Jack was showing him around because the Wymack asked him to.#Wymack was hoping that Daniel would leave #Neil was his usual charming self to the board of directors #Which is to say he ripped them apart #Honestly if Andrew was there at the board meeting the last scene wouldn't have happened #Andrew and Neil would be too busy sexiling Kevin to be walking and see FF #But alas #Andrew was doing homework and eating ice cream #Also Matt and Kevin got up to Phase 13 #Because I'm a sucker for keeping up with themes #Andreil

282 notes · View notes

juergenklopp · 7 months

Text

NBCSPhilly Sounds like Bryson Stott has been in Trea Turner's ear about who stole more bases in 2023

— for @mattstrahm

#WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK #Bryson Stott #Trea Turner #Philadelphia Phillies #MLB #baseball #baseballedit #sportsedit #usernrzr #MLB 2024 #Spring Training 2024 #.gif #.original #(I've forgotten how to make gifs though this took me so long ffs)#@ N it started out with a spring training vision now we're here comrade

37 notes · View notes

icarianstars · 2 years

Text

#happy birthday to everyone’s favourite grumpy wolf boy #let’s just ignore the fact that I’m posting this at 11:20 and there’s only 40 minutes left of his birthday #honestly it’s fairly standard for me #also that cup took me SO. FUCKING. LONG.#it honestly had no business being as hard as it was #like it’s a plastic cup ffs #anyway I’m tired and therefore grumpy #but I couldn’t let myself go to sleep without posting this #remus lupin #remus lupin fanart #marauders #marauders era #marauders fanart #happy birthday Moony #my art

286 notes · View notes

abysswalkersknight · 8 months

Text

Bloody finally finished a fic! It might just be the longest one I've ever done and it certainly felt like it when writing it. This is the first fic for my twst x final fantasy au so I did a lot of research with ffxiv and ffxvi I hope you like it, I did my best to keep the Eikon names out because I have know idea what to call them if anyone has any suggestions? I might eventually decide to put it on ao3 as well if anybody was interested.

Apologies for the rushed ending though, it was much longer then I intended for it to be and I was running out of paper. But other then that please enjoy!

........................

Where did his little one go?

Was what was spiralling through the old general’s head when he returned home to an empty house, there were no soft greetings from his precious dear or even his cute pale face peeking around the corner. ‘Silver? I’m home!’ He calls out, wondering if his son was simply playing outside with his animal friends. There was no answer. He was met with a heavy silence, my, how odd.

Normally Lilia wouldn’t have minded his son’s absence as the boy had often the habit of falling asleep in the most random of places and would need a bit of encouragement to wake up, but Lilia’s checked in all the cupboards, the bathroom, their bedrooms and closets, hell he’s even dropped down onto the cool wooden floor to peer under the beds themselves. But there was simply no sign of his boy, perhaps he’s just having some alone time, while that in itself was just fine, the silence furrowed Lilia’s brow and stirred something deep and restless within his chest, he glanced outside the window, thankfully the snow that day was only light but the darkening clouds above spoke of a daunting blizzard approaching, I should go look for him, the storm could be here by nightfall. Oh well, an extra walk wouldn’t be much of a bother and the racing in his heart will only be quelled with his darling boy either nestled within his arms or safely within his sight.

And all because of his blasted heritage.

Silver had hardly experienced a few years of a normal life, only for those few short years to be shattered the moment it was discovered that Silver was a Dominant… And in possession of a very special Eikon.

Typically it was rare for a kingdom to possess even one Eikon, their Dominants often dying off too soon from overuse and the Eikon vanishing into thin air until they chose another poor soul to haunt.

Briar Valley, on the other hand, knew how to take care of their Dominants and has had the pleasure to lay claim to two Dominants, soon to be three with the strongest being their very own prince and future king. Many would foolishly dream of receiving such a privilege, to be ‘blessed’ by a being akin to a god, Lilia had always loathed this high ‘honour’. It was no blessing, nothing to gaze adoringly at, this curse was nothing more than a fancy name for the tight chains shackled upon all who were burdened with such power, he should know, he himself owned a very old pair. Earlier on in his life Lilia had quickly discovered that a Dominant nothing more than a mere shiny weapon to use at their kingdom’s disposal, they were not seen as a living, breathing being but something only meant to slash, cut and chop at the enemy until their blade shattered into tiny, brittle pieces, and even then those pieces were used until every granule was worn down. And now to Lilia’s horror, those very same shackles were suddenly clamped around his precious little one’s tiny delicate wrists.

But cruel as it was, that was not the worst of it.

Growling deeply in his throat Lilia quietly shrugs on his weary cloak and stealthily slips out into the cold, making sure no one was around despite living in the middle of nowhere, just as they liked it.

A year ago within the Black Scale castle’s throne room, the senate had not at all been pleased when their eldest Dominant had announced that he would be moving out of the castle, and taking the newly found Dominant with him. In fact they had been quite furious, spitting curses at him, as he remained kneeled on the stone floor with his little one clutching onto Malleus’s clothes while trying to hide under the prince’s comforting arm and cloak.

‘How dare you forsake the privileges that were so graciously given to filth like you!’ They screeched and so forth. Lilia hadn’t cared for a single inane word they spewed at him, but then those harsh insults were instead suddenly thrown at a petrified Silver, ‘as if we’ll let you run off to let such a dangerous creature roam freely!’

‘It must atone for the sins of its kind! Did you forget what it did to our beloved princess?!’

‘Get that vile human away from the prince!’ as they yelled and shrieked all of these accusations and scorn, his poor darling little Silver trembled and whimpered as frightened tears silently fell from the child’s cheeks. Malleus even had to hold back a grunt of discomfort with how hard those little fingers dug into his hip, Lilia saw red.

He couldn’t remember much of what happened next, only how it took several guards dogpiling on top of Lilia to hold him down as Malleus, with wide eyes, suddenly pushed Silver back behind his legs fully as he tore into the senate ‘you dare question my judgement!’ he snarls, forcing the senate back with a hot plume of green flame ‘it is with my authority and blessing that Lord Vanrouge has permission to live elsewhere, opposing such is akin to opposing House Draconia itself. Need I remind you of your place, senate?’ In the end, before Malleus could set the senate aflame in Silver’s honour, it was thanks to Malleus’s grandmother Maleficia, who had made sure that Lilia was able to leave the capital safely. Along the way it had taken all of Lilia’s willpower to ignore all the hateful looks and scorn that all of a sudden seemingly spurred from every noble citizen he’s passed, it set Lilia’s blood ablaze as they were all directed at his stunned child, what utter fools! How dare they blame such a small child for all the wrongdoings of their kin! For the seven’s sake, Silver wasn’t even old enough to have been born during the war against the silver owls, let alone play a part in it! It was not as if the fae were free of guilt either. His poor little one had been so frightened from earlier that he stiffly hid inside Lilia’s cloak while keeping his wet face buried in his neck and had refused to move a single muscle until they had arrived at their new home. Lilia even worried at some point in their journey that Silver had stopped breathing with how tense and still he was.

Lilia sighed, had he known the full extent of Silver’s ancestry, he would have never brought him to Briar Valley in the first place. If only I hadn’t killed his father.

At that thought Lilia shook his head, dislodging some snow particles. No, he didn’t have time for the past, what's done is done and he still had to find his son. The cool winter air nipped at his nose and ears, numbing them as his long dark hair lashed out with the gradually drifting snowflakes. Ever since the calamity five years ago, Briar Valley has been thrown into an eternal state of dark winters, harsh though it may be, the townsfolk have adapted well enough that they could still live comfortably. With every few steps he takes Lilia passes by warm braziers, dancing with green flame as he enters the city.

‘Oh! Lord Lilia!’ a woman suddenly called out as the old general made his way through the rapidly falling snow. Cupping above his eyes and squinting, it was getting hard to properly identify anyone within the plaza, but thankfully with signature flowing locks as green as the richest of forests and a voice as boisterous to match, it wasn’t hard to tell who exactly was calling him, and wasn’t she a sight for sore eyes. He sighs in relief as Baul’s daughter cheerfully waves him over to the stall she was currently at once he was in clear view ‘how pleasant it is to see you down here my lord, are you out shopping as well?’ She chirps, paying the merchant as they packed her purchase, Lilia smiled tiredly and waved off the merchant when they gesture to their wares ‘no, no, not today at least, I’m just looking for a wayward son of mine’ he suppressed a rush of worried fear that threatened to wash over his whole being, he could still hear those heartbreaking wails and pained whimpers as his little one cradles a spasming hand close to his chest. For the past year Lilia hasn’t been without Silver clutching to his side for more than a day or two, and even then he’d make sure that his boy was in either Malleus’ or the Zigvolt’s care, for good reason as well.

It was part of why they had to move. While there was the fact that the castle was already a pretty little cage for Briar Valley’s Dominants, the sole reason they moved was because of the Eikon Silver possessed, and all the abhor and scorn that came with it.

If anyone had ever thought the rough treatment Lilia received for being an ‘unworthy’ Dominant was bad, then his sweet little one had it even worse, he was already ridiculed for being human, and then to add fuel to the fire it was found that he bore the very Eikon that had ultimately slain their late princess who had been the prince’s predecessor… And his mother. Thus writing in big bold letters where and who exactly Silver’s lineage were.

Lilia frowned, he’d always had his suspicions but to have this as confirmation. He’d rather have stayed blissfully ignorant, thankfully Malleus didn’t give a chocobo’s arse who Silver’s Eikon was or what it’s done with his predecessor, it’s only a burden either way one that we now both share, he claimed when the senate had so viciously revealed the truth, the prince had solemnly looked down to the small child, in that sense he is just as cursed as I am. Lilia suspected they did that to further Malleus’s dislike for humans, only to have the opposite reaction to Lilia’s tremendous satisfaction.

Unaware of Lilia’s harrowing thoughts, Mrs Zigvolt’s sharp eyes narrowed into furious slits ‘you mean they haven’t told you yet? Those blunt headed fools!’ if he weren’t for his training, Lilia would have jumped at the sudden volume though he did back off a little, just in case. She then turned to him ‘apologies my lord, I’d thought that the boys would have told you by now but it seems I had too much faith in them,’ she shook her head ‘you needn’t worry about Silver, he’s actually gone off with my father and Sebek to the training grounds, father said he’d send a bat for you but it seems it didn’t show’ did he hear her right? Baul took his son to the training grounds? The castle training grounds?! Has the old crocodile gone senile? Baul better pray to his gods right now because Lilia’s going to bite his face off! Or at least he would if he wasn’t so confused as to how Baul managed to convince Silver to leave the house at all, it was hard enough for Malleus to get the boy to leave the forest’s safety. Before he could blink Lilia was already teleporting to the castle where he flies past the guards who were left stunned in the disturbed snow, clutching their polearms with bewildered expressions. He’s eventually stopped when a strong yet delicate hand suddenly grabs him by the shoulder ‘Lilia!’ exclaimed Malleus, he seemed shocked to see his guardian so frazzled as being compared to his usual carefree nature, coming at such a speed that his long hair was all over the place and damp with melted snow, his eyes soften with understanding though when Lilia ignores him in favour of frantically looking around for his dear Silver ‘don’t worry Lilia, he’s safe and just over this way’ he leads Lilia to peer around the corner where, in a secluded area that was usually abandoned came a barrage of determined youthful yelling.

‘Come, have at thee!’

‘Hiya!’

The shouts came from the middle where two young boys clashed together, their wooden lances slashing and faking fatal jabs. Snow sprayed and danced at their swift movement, either aiding or hindering them. From the sideline stood Baul Zigvolt, watching with an unconcerned yet stern eye, he waves over the prince and general while barking for the boys to continue ‘how has he been?’ Lilia asks, watching as the boys fought with precision and reckless abandon, just as he taught them. He was unable to take his eyes off his boy, as those beautiful silver locks spun in the cool air, that pale skin that made him seem gracefully spectral but it was those exquisite auroral eyes that captured Lilia, ever since the discovery of his Eikon Silver’s eyes have been dull, full of guilt and fear, but now as he parries another blow from Sebek, they were determined, a light returned to those big eyes that were once full of wonder. ‘How did you get him out?’ he breathed, Baul nods knowingly, after all he was there when every with the senate happened ‘don’t ask me, ask my grandson’ he grumbles proudly gesturing to the younger Zigvolt who blocked a hit from the side ‘he saw the boy training alone then brought him over demanding that they spar together, I honestly don’t know what he told Silver but it was enough to convince him to come’ he then looks sheepish ‘ah, apologies as well general, I did intend to let you know about this as soon as possible but we couldn’t have just waited around without risking anything.’

‘Baul.’ He was smiling but there was something chilling in Lilia’s tone. Baul blanched and sweatdrop ‘ye-yes general?’

‘While I appreciate what you’ve done, know that after this I’m breaking your old legs.’

#knight's writing #silver twst #lilia vanrouge #malleus draconia #sebek zigvolt #twst #twst x ff #this took so long oh my god #I swear I can write cute fluffy stuff as well this just took a hold of me #and now here we are

39 notes · View notes

iamthepulta · 2 months

Text

i did it u_u

#actually rather pleased with my Bronze Age abstract #Advisor is going to demolish the Other one but that's okay because I at least did something so I got the practice and I can sleep now.#It's kind of funny I was writing the Bronze Age one and I can already feel the struggle of compressing a dissertation's worth #of information into 15 minutes. Like ffs I'm supposed to speedrun oil as an extraction reductant and also talk about Egypt's alum trade?#But this is My Fault. I have done this to myself.#Okay but I'm already bubbling with excitement to talk about Leather Tanning again. Nobody was here when I went on this massive #5 hour long rabbit hole of leather tanning research because... I think I was trying to find out if you could use mushroom collagen #to replicate leather? (The answer is yes.) But it took me down this road of Leather tanning because I was trying to understand the #ion exchange that makes it supple and TLDR there's this massive exploitative industry in the Middle East and Southeast Asia that uses #Cobalt salts because the Co 3+ sits really nicely in the collagen site and you can quickly dye and destroy most of the organics from the #animal itself; but because of that you've also destroyed the texture of the leather. I forget why Al 3+ isn't used. I think it's because it #weathers over time and the leather becomes stiff and hard again. Same with Fe3+. ANYWAY. Try and find thick leather when you #do buy leather because leather IS great and I will die(dye) on this hill. But it's the exploitative textile industry that causes problems.#Honestly I've forgotten 90% of the chemistry but it's so fucking cool and a really interesting peek into an organic affected by inorganics #rather than affecting an inorganic mineral with organics. UGH I love chemistry so much. It's so fucking cool.#ptxt #christ this might be my worst tag essay lol

10 notes · View notes

1driedpersimmon · 1 year

Text

Shop opening!!

I'M FINALLY OPENING MY SHOP !! I will be opening it this Friday!! (9/8) at 3pm PST !!! This will be my sale for all my left over stock from the pre-orders! I do not plan on restocking after this sale!! (Store link in thread!! It won't open till the date!)

All charms are $14! btw! And I ship internationally!

(Also!!! I've officially sent out every pre-order that has been paid for!! If you never got an email with tracking, haven't gotten contacted for a pre-order, please contact me before Friday to secure your pre-order!! (or else it will go into the shop stock!))

#shop #I am #So sorry it took this long um so #My excuse is that i didn't know how busy I'd be with school and work so I got side tracked alot...#Also me playing ff does not count that's my self care mental health healing time ok #anyways... Finally!!!!!!

26 notes · View notes

jilyandbambi · 1 year

Text

labels like psychopathy and sociopathy are too hastily ascribed to Shauna Shipman not least of all because, A) all of the #unhinged behaviors & actions we've seen from her are more accurately attributable to a combination of 1) PTSD, 2) post-partum depression, 3) grief, 4) arrested development

AND-- more importantly insofar as it concerns definitions:

B) the key hallmarks of antisocial personality disorder (the clinical term for sociopathy/psychopathy) distinguishing it from mere jerkass behavior are 1) lack of remorse/regret or guilt for past actions, 2) inability to feel empathy* for others.

*empathy: the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another

two things Shauna is not are unempathetic and unable to feel remorse.

From the moment we meet Shauna as a kid she's writhing in guilt, and--I would argue--empathy. The whole reason she can't bring herself to tell Jackie she's planning on going to Brown is that she knows the disappointment will devastate Jackie and she doesn't want to hurt her best friend's feelings. Yes, she resents herself and especially Jackie for this but Shauna's empathy is what paralyzes her and keeps her from being honest.

Adult Shauna is just as capable of remorse/guilt and empathy:

When Tai shows up at her house and confides in her that she's started sleepwalking again, without Tai even having to ask, Shauna invites her to spend the night and promises to watch over her

after Callie shares with her how Shauna's unwillingness to discuss her past has deeply hurt Callie, Shauna acknowledges how her inability to confront her trauma has hurt her child and immediately tries to make amends by giving Callie what she needs and opening up.

And this is without getting into how Shauna's immense guilt and shame over her actions in the wilderness compelled her to punish herself post-rescue by not going to Brown (her dream school) and instead transforming her life into a living memorial to her dead friend.

Even adult Shauna's most violent action--killing Adam--wasn't an act of cold-blooded murder but rather happened as a result of PTSD-induced psychosis, as evidenced by her hallucinating that her journals are missing from the safe in the first place, and the flash to teen Shauna right after she guts him. She wasn't in her right mind. Does that excuse her? No. But killing someone during a bout of psychosis brought on by untreated PTSD is not the same as intentionally killing someone to solve a problem or in a fit of rage.

Is Shauna a violent person? Yes. Is she a selfish person? Yes. Is she self-destructive? Yes. Does she often behave irresponsibly and inappropriately? Yes. Is she dangerous? YES. But these qualities don't make her a psychopath. She's got too much empathy and is too burdened by guilt to have APD.

Shauna Shipman is what 2 1/2 decades of untreated PTSD & PPD + unresolved grief does to a person

#shauna shipman #yellowjackets #yj s2 #shauna x jackie #jackie x shauna #yellowjackets meta #bc y'all are on my nerves again #i h8 when you people learn a new word and put it on everything like a damn trapper keeper #making me defend a ww?? the week leading into juneteeth??? a ntiblack #THE GIRL TRIED TO KILL HERSELF IN THE WOODS WITH AN UNDERWIRE ABORTION #JUST SO SHE WOULDN'T HURT JACKIE'S FEELINGS #SHE WAS READY TO BURN TO DEATH TO SAVE VAN HELLO??#SHE NEVER TOOK CALLIE'S FAVORITE TOY OUT OF THE CAR #SHE RISKED HER LIFE TO GET IT BACK #learn what words mean ffs #long post

22 notes · View notes