#this was supposed to be hot

[deadmomjokes]

PSA: tomatoes are not spicy. Tomatoes and tomato products should not be spicy. Pizza sauce isn't inherently spicy. Tomato-based pasta sauce is not spicy. Ketchup is NOT spicy.

If tomatoes are spicy, you have an allergy to tomatoes.

This announcement brought to you by my almost 29-year-old husband learning for the first time in his 2.8 decades of putting food products into his mouth that spaghetti and saucy pizza aren't spicy foods

[navree]

my adventures with superman turning deathstroke the fucking terminator into an anime twink is the single greatest thing i've seen in the history of animation i have not been able to stop laughing

[canisalbus]

Yeah sorry I drew this.

Hope you feel better soon ♡

.

[idyllcy]

winter heatwave - zayne x reader

"It's so hot..." You grumble, sprawled out on Zayne's couch in his office as you grumble. "Global warming my beloathed..."

Zayne swipes his hand in the air, chilly air brushing your skin as he continues at his documents.

"That's not enough, doctor." You sigh. "Can I hug a snowman?"

"The AC is on. You can only blame your body for being naturally warm."

"Well it's usually bearable because I'm cuddled with you when it's hot." You groan. "I can't believe it's supposed to be winter and it's hotter than you outside."

"That comparison doesn't work. I'm naturally cold."

"Which is why we work together so well, duh." You sit up, yawning slightly. "Can I sit on your lap?"

"That's unprofessional."

"Didn't say no." You settle yourself in his lap, lashes fluttering shut as you snuggle into the ice of his skin. Much better.

(You miss the way Zayne's face flushes pink down his neck and to his ears as you do)

[blackkatdraws2]

There are more things in the Parable than Stanley knows about. [Blank Scripts AU]

[i-beepoll3n-inluv]

Man, I'm so fugging single

[chipartwork]

"Get out."

[tariah23]

oooooo white people in my replies really saying ‘I can excuse racism but I draw the line at homophobia’

Not surprised since this is the site that only talks about racism and thinks it’s a big deal when they see it demonstrated in the cartoons and comics they like *coughs* dungeonmeshi *coughs* (for example at least. I haven’t seen THIS many white ppl talk as in depth about racism on here as much as these fandom nerds, man. I stg. Like “Ohhhh, so you all DO acknowledge that racism is real? Just not in real life even if you could feel it slapping you in the face at high speed. Gotcha.” It’s crazy.

Tumblr is like, 90% white and is extremely centered around them. That’s why you barely see stuff that’s important to black and brown people ever trending here or being talked about. It has to be something incredibly huge to the point where even white people can’t ignore it like they usually do, to talk about it here.

They only talked about George Floyd here because the topic of his death became world news. Even people in other countries were talking about it. Before him, it was probably Ferguson and Trayvon Martin… most of them are still trying their best to ignore the genocides because it’s a “touchy subject.” What do you expect from white people who live in their own bubbles of comfort and refuse to pop it with a needle??? They find comfort in their privilege and faux ignorance (they love playing stupid to avoid conversations about important things outside of fandoms like, are these mfs born with half a brain dedicated to fandom or what.) That’s literally all these mfs make a big deal out of, especially on this annoying ass platform. The ao3 mfs will go to war for the site that allows racist ff and cp like it’s no big deal. I wonder how many people here even donated to the site while actively scrolling past dono posts from folks who really do need help. They act like they’re doing a civil service by defending this site that makes over the amount of it’s intended dono goal in minutes.

Then you already know as soon as you even bring up racism in the stuff they like, they start ganging up and harassing black bloggers especially, calling them TERFs and the whole nine. Anything to make that person look bad for being concerned about the racism that they have such an intense aversion to. God, it’s absolutely exhausting knowing that these people would have no problem choosing a cartoon character over your entire existence if they COULD. Isn’t that fucking sad, man?

[kasirose]

Mirror selfie malec <3

[galacticsuperstitions]

i kept thinking about that one edgy phase Amiya post so i drew it out. when are we getting the fully black outfit for her HG

[l3viat8an]

Levi and somniphilia is the best scenario

Like you'll both be sleeping and he'll be having spicy dream and all of a sudden his tail is slowly pushing your panties to the side and pushing in

And the best part is you'll wake up but he'll still be sleeping!!

-🕸

Nsfw content MDNI

Taillllll tail!!! Shkshsuywjababa wjgejsgs- oh fuck his tail!

Cuddling in his bathtub always means you’re basically laying on top of Levi in your big comfy t-shirt and underwear.

Levi’s arms and tail usually wrap around you, pulling you closer in his sleep as he mumbles your name.

Slowly his tail uncurls from around your middle and snakes it’s way down your legs, sliding just the tip underneath your underwear, rubbing around almost tantalizingly slow between your folds, moving and teasing your clit.

The sudden pleasure spiking through you jerks you awake and Levi’s arms instinctively wrap tighter around you at the same moment his tail slides its way inside your eager sex earning a breathy moan form you. You bite into your lip to keep quiet.

And his tail speeds up on your clit and you can’t stop the whine of Levi’s name that slips past your lips, utter need laced into the word not that he can hear you.

His tail continues it’s work, shifting and twisting in on itself a little so the thicker part is stroking back and forth between your folds as the tip continues playing with your clit, working you closer and closer to your orgasm.

You keep your legs spread as his tail sides in and out of you, slightly increasing his pace. The thought of being so full of him and of him needing you this bad even in his sleep helps push you closer too.

You whine with need, thoughts rendering completely incoherent as your brain starts short-circuits, only able to focus on the pleasure you practically crave now~

Your back arches, which ends up urging his tail deeper inside you, and it doesn’t seem to mind, working its way and going so deep it hits that spot inside you that leaves you panting and moaning as you cum.

A louder cry of Levi’s name on your lips, has the demon jerking half awake, his tail slips out of you and he see it covered in your slick ‘n cum, “Fuck….that’s hot…” he mumbles, still mostly out of it as he presses a few hot, open mouthed kisses to your neck and cheeks. “You did so good for me…….M-MC, so good…” and Levi’s already falling back into whatever wet dream he was having.

[la-cocotte-de-paris]

A lesson in the lustful female Gayze™: LA RELIGIEUSE / THE NUN (1966), dir. Jacques Rivette

[eskildit]

i think a lot about hot sauce and jeannemary. two young girls so ready to kill and to die. a comparison made all the worse when you recall that hot sauce lost all her family to the cohort, that she can specifically recall fourth style necromancy (using corpses as bombs). a fourteen and thirteen year old that could easily have been on opposite sides of the same front line. 

[moonlight]

JOSH HARTNETT AS DANNY WALKER

Pearl Harbour (2001) dir. Michael Bay

[guinevereslancelot]

what was with cameron house md she spends 90% of the episode saying she wants their patient to die bc he's a genocidal dictator and her colleague husband says "babe it bothers me for ethical reasons that you want our patient to die :(" and she said "hm maybe you're right :/" but when it comes down to it the genocidal dictator lays a finger on her in an aggressive manner and chase instantly commits medical malpractice to murder the guy and then when he tells her she LEAVES HIM bc boo hoo he's a murderer now like GIRL he killed a man for you!!! he's wracked with catholic guilt!!! he's being crushed beneath the weight of his sins because he chose his devotion to you over his devotion to god!!! he literally could not get any sexier at this moment in time!!!

[sorio99]

Knowing “Nerdy Prudes Must Die” was the first idea the Lang brothers had for Hatchetfield makes the whole series so much funnier.

Like, did they know in “The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals” that the weirdo who demanded a hot chocolate would be the leading man of the high school horror show?

Did they know the prude they mentioned a few times would be a homophobic murderer who defiled a corpse, fucked a ghost, and became a vessel for dark lords?

Was the homeless man joke in BEFORE the recast because they were still brothers, or not?