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acourtofthought · 6 months

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How do you think Lucien is going to react to having Helion as a father? I know everyone is excited about it and thinks Lucien will be happy to find a different father but I just don't feel like he's going to be happy with Helion. At. All. Not after what his mother has gone through; I know it's not exactly Helion's fault, but I think Lucien will attribute Helion as a major cause for much of his mother's abuse. Also, she waited for him and he didn't come for her. Also, I don't think Helion is going to be a "cool dad;" I'm not sure how he's going to feel about having a son who grew up in the Autumn Court. How do you think Helion will react? Anyway, this is why I'm more invested in Lucien and Eris repairing their relationship.

I definitely don't think Lucien is going to run straight into Helions arms, thankful for a decent father figure at last. I imagine he'd have too many unanswered questions at first (not to mention they haven't been written as having any sort of relationship in the series so far, even one outside father / son).

Did Helion know Lucien was his son? Did he suspect?

If so then Lucien would definitely want to know why he never attempted to have a relationship with him.

Though I can't imagine SJM would write a scenario where Helion knew and didn't have a valid reason for keeping his distance, she has spoken of being weirdly obsessed with Helions character so I don't imagine she'd want to turn him into the bad guy especially when Lucien already has one of those in his life in Beron.

I think eventually, we're going to see Helion and Lucien getting along well. They're too similar in their sassy personalities with a flare to their style not to find common ground and recognize a likeness to one another. But Lucien is grown now, he doesn't need a dad to play catch with, so any relationship that does form isn't going to look the same as what it would have had he been much younger. Maybe there will be a scene where Helion offers him advice on his situation with Elain, about not giving up on hope when it comes to the right female and that will be a representation of their bonding, something Helion personally has experience with and could share his wisdom on. However I think we'll see them connect on a more equal level rather than Helion suddenly morphing into Super Dad trying to constantly guide Lucien without Lucien asking for his advice.

I hope Lucien doesn't blame Helion for what happened with his mother because Helion was no more capable of stopping Beron than Lucien and Eris were.

Lucien is centuries old at this point. Not as old as Rhys and the others in the IC but maybe 300? 400?

The LoA was twenty when she married Beron and had many sons before Lucien. Helion only came into power about 40 years ago while UTM as Amarantha killed the HL of Day and most of their family when they tried to rebel.

That means when the LoA married Beron, Helion had no idea he'd become a High Lord and that means he may not have had the power to stop Beron who already had internal ties to power. It also sounds like neither Helion or the LoA had any chance in what appears to have been her arranged marriage.

I also think it's important to remember that the LOA chose to stay.

The LoA did not reach out for help, she did not request someone free her from Berons shackles.

So who was Helion to interfere in her marriage? What he thinks she should do and what he'd like to do doesn't trump what she herself did.

I actually have had personal experience (not my own but family members) who are victims of domestic abuse and I can attest to the fact that you can't force someone to leave unless they want to. You can offer them all the help and a place of safety but there is truly no interfering and insisting they leave if they themselves aren't ready to walk away.

I do agree that I'd also love to see Eris and Lucien repair their relationship if there is some valid reason behind the years Eris spent treating Lucien cruelly. I think that's the direction SJM is heading, she's laid a few hints that maybe he could have been protecting Lucien in a way that wouldn't raise Berons suspicions but we still haven't gotten a true explanation for it all.

Really, I want all the relationships for Lucien.

I want to see him reconnecting with his brother so he has one decent sibling.

I want to see Helion and Lucien working towards a relationship, in whatever capacity that is.

I want he and Tamlin to find peace with one another even if they don't end up being extremely close.

I would like Az to finally acknowledge Lucien is a worthy male and for the two to move forward as friendly acquaintances.

I want him to be blissfully happy with his mate.

He's spent so many years alone and there would be nothing more satisfying than seeing him surrounded by love in every court.

#pro lucien vanserra

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sinhasaheart · 2 years

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Hal getting Sinestro's soul from hell

There's a chill across the scene, inspiring true fear from those who have been apathetic to Sinestro's threats and demands so far. At first, he believes he is the cause, he has finally succeeded, but the back of his neck is prickling with the sensation of some vast shadow looming over him.

Carefully, cautiously, Sinestro turns. There is no inhuman monster, no grotesque demon such as he has seen in this miserable place. Standing before him is Hal Jordan.

Nothing can be more plain and simple than that human figure in his dull clothing carding his fingers through mussed brown hair with an awkward smile. It's possibly too perfect of an unassuming image but it's real enough and every function of Sinestro has been seized control of, a paralysing infection.

For vastly different reasons is Sinestro wary than to the common dwellers of this dimension. They sense the power beneath the illusion, everything that is not Hal. It doesn't threaten Sinestro. He's concerned merely about Hal Jordan, and for good reason. Hardly can it be considered shameful.

Sinestro's hand is grabbed and it's like ice as the image of Hal pulls him into a corner. None of the demons or spirits, whatever they are, seek to lend Sinestro aid. They are wiser than to interfere with the powerful force in their midst.

"Abomination," Sinestro greets when he finally yanks his hand free. "I have no interest in speaking with you. There is no history between us."

That gets a faintly annoyed look, partly fed up and disbelieving. "Not this again." It's Hal's voice too, a perfect copy. "I am Hal Jordan." And it is true, even as the image is no more than an image, an interpretation of being.

The interpretation is not the entire story and Sinestro will not be deceived. "You are not only Hal Jordan," he retorts.

Automatic is the answer, given without a hesitation, cracking like a whip. "And whose fault is that?"

Their eyes meet, yellow on brown. Nothing can be read in Hal's eyes, a mystery to Sinestro as they rarely are, and he cannot decide who has given the response, what is being referred to. So he remains quiet, waiting for some hint.

Finally, the brown gaze is dropped. "We're not here to talk about me," is said. "And you don't belong here."

A startled laugh escapes Sinestro for it is the very last thing he ever expects to hear from he who stands before him. "Perhaps you are less of Hal Jordan than you believe. To be so unaware, so disconnected from who you claim to be... Pathetic."

Something Sinestro has said appears to have made an impact. He's grabbed by the front and the fierce creature is glaring at him. "What do you expect? I'll put you inside my head so you can talk to the only part of me you give a damn about?"

Trying to appear unaffected, Sinestro tosses his own head and says, "You don't have a head, Jordan." Then he curses silently, the moment he realises what he's just said.

Grinning, Hal rests his hand against Sinestro's cheek and maybe, just maybe, it's a little warmer than before. "I'm getting you out of here," he says without further preamble. "Whether you like it or not. So shut up and do what you're told."

Sinestro bares his teeth but he says nothing, sulking but ultimately obeying. Resisting further is a waste of time. The will of Hal Jordan is impossible to deny.

#halsinestro #hal jordan #sinestro #my fic #ask

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myatuesday · 1 year

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May 7/8, 2023

[I'm just gonna put this right here]

So, someone posted this:

And then someone in the comments went on a long rant and kept going and going and going about personal responsibility and forgiving yourself and the importance of positive thoughts and just ALL this cliche known it all BULLSHIT. And called it "straight facts". But she's definitely under 25 (if not under 21). So I finally had to be like:

Look, you mean well. But you aren't the authority on life and mental health.

I'm simply saying what you're saying might work for you or others, if the shoe fits. But EVERYONE is dealing w different shit. You can't call anecdotal experience "straight fucking truth".

I'm a grown ass woman. I've been in therapy for 20+ years. I recovered from BPD in my 20s (had like 10 good years) just to go through so much trauma in my 30s, I relapsed into it yet again. But this time, they called it CPTSD.

Just a few things that happened (not even half of it): I got hit by a drunk driver and it caused my career to suffer. Then I got hit AGAIN when I was in recovery from surgery from the first wreck and now my back is FUCKED FUCKED. Changed my entire life. Then I lost my housing. Then XYZ 123. Shit just spiraled from there. Then when things were finally looking up after years of trying to recover from all that, I was diagnosed w cancer, abandoned by basically everyone close to me during that time (that alone will change someone's world view real fucking quick) and my closet friend died within months of me getting dx w cancer. And I kinda just gave the fuck up after that. Because WTAF.

So like... don't tell me shit. I lost everything too many times by events that were 100% out of my control. Despite doing everything right and being in a good place before life decided to fuck me again and again and again.

I'm not saying this as a sob story or pity party. I'm saying this, so that you understand your one size fits all solution doesn't fit every situation. It's dangerous to speak on matters you don't fully understand and call them fact.

I'm glad what you're doing is working for you. But no part of recovery and mental wellness is one size fits all. And we're all fighting very different battles, even if we may have similar diagnosis or some issues in common, etc. It's not as simple as mind over matter and all that jazz all the time.

I used to believe in everything you're saying. Said it myself too, I'm sure. Then life came at me fast, just when I thought I had it all figured out. So yeah. It's important to know that not all destruction is self destruction by any means. We can be doing our best and still being going through the worst shit.

Even people who are healthy and living their best life go through life altering shit that turns their world upside down (fire, car crash, death, rape, natural disaster, fucking worldwide pandemic, whatever. Hell, maybe all of it all at once). It's hard on anyone. It's just even harder on those of us who do also have pre-existing mental health issues to cope with ALL of that shit all at once in one lifetime. It's a fucking lot.

So just keep that in mind. That's all I'm suggesting. Not all trauma or mental health issues or whatever is making our life fucking suck is the same experience as someone else's. And the solution (if there is one at all) isn't going to look the same for everyone. Give people some grace or like benefit of the doubt that they may understand their own situation better than you. You can be supportive without being preachy.

I just know the worst thing, especially when dealing w people dealing w BPD, anxiety, depression, is to make them feel like it's their fault or that they're the ones standing in their own way. Unless you know *for a fact* that is the case. And, even then, tough love isn't the best approach. Because people can just go into self loathing mode and spiral more.

Just it's better to listen than to talk sometimes. You have to really understand where someone is and why in order to attempt to help them help themselves out of that place. If you even can.

That's all.

I don't really feel like writing out why I responded, why that was my response, or why I'm posting it here now.

I'm just putting it here. x

#mental health #mental wellness #healing #recovery #BPD #actually BPD #CPTSD #actually cptsd #life

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queen-thinky-thoughts · 2 years

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What are your thoughts on freddie calling mary his "common law wife", that is assuming that he said it? Do you think that was him trying to adhere to his public persona and make sure his privacy is protected, or he was being truthful or literal? Or do you think it's a bit of both - that he meant there was a "marriage" in their relationship even though they're not officially together or romantically involved?

Yes, he did say that.

I think it was a mix of a few things, personally. Firstly, I don't think that, to the end of his life, Freddie ever came to see marriage as anything but something that existed between a man and a woman.

Please hear me out before you all get the pitchforks and burn me at the stake. I beg. Thank you.

I'm not basing this just on Phoebe saying exactly that. I think what Phoebe presumed - that Freddie would never have married a man because he believed marriage was between a man and a woman - is not a logical presumption to make, because if Freddie had lived, he too would have experienced the changing times and likely re-thought a thing or two which he used to believe. Phoebe is basing this on Freddie's beliefs at a time when marriage between two men was impossible, unthinkable, ridiculous, in the eyes of the world.

Given the amount of internalised homophobia which comes into play when we're talking about Freddie, to me at least it seems that he never stopped believing that there was something wrong with him. That being gay was ultimately wrong. That the right/natural/normal thing would have been to marry a woman and start a family. I think the highest level of self-acceptance he reached was that he accepted he was "abnormal" and was as okay with that as he could be. As many marginalised people do, he embraced being different, in that way. It makes perfect sense to me that he would have believed marriage only existed between a man and a woman. The vast majority of people believed that, at the time. (Please have a look at this, for example, which only goes back as far as 2003. In the 80s gay marriage was barely even on the table as a future possibility. In 1985, the first bill had only just been passed to allow registration for domestic partnership in West Hollywood. The entire concept of same-sex marriage equality was in its infancy.)

But wait! - you'll say. Freddie called Jim his husband! They were married in their own eyes!

Yes, and no. Freddie and his friends also called each other 'she' and women's names, Freddie also referred to himself as 'Mother' when writing letters to his friends. Another trend which originally stemmed from gay culture is calling your partner 'Daddy' without any connection to the actual meaning of those words. Were Jim and Freddie as good as married? Absolutely, they were in a committed relationship which was as meaningful and loving as any marriage. (Just by the way, no two people have to be legally married to love each other. A marriage certificate is not proof of real love. I know that should be obvious, but it's worth saying.) Did Freddie and Jim really, truly think of each other as husbands, in the same sense as they thought of hetero couples as husband and wife? Who knows. Maybe. Personally, I find it unlikely because same-sex marriage equality is a concept which is more modern than the times they lived through and grew up in.

Having said all that, back to Mary. I think that Freddie believed for the entire duration of their relationship (the romantic part, followed by their friendship) that it was his fault the relationship had failed. That the problem was him, that he 'owed' it to Mary to provide what he would have provided, had he been her husband, and that she was the closest thing to a wife (in the traditional sense) he had. So, with all that in mind, I don't find that quote surprising or strange at all.

To him, she was the woman he should have married but didn't because he was gay. He thought she was the only who should have been his wife, and so, aside from there being no romance involved, he viewed her as such. I doubt he ever even stopped to think about it much. She played his girlfriend in front of the press, in front of his parents, that was her role. There is nothing sweet or romantic about it, for me. It simply speaks of the mindset of a man riddled with guilt and internalised homophobia. What does "common law" mean, by the way? "A common law marriage is a legally recognized marriage between two people who have not purchased a marriage license or had their marriage solemnized by a ceremony."

So, as good as married. And what did the concept of "wife" mean to Freddie, who grew up with parents who'd had an arranged marriage?(This isn't a confirmed fact, but the chances that theirs wasn't an arranged marriage are very small.) I think wife would have probably meant to him a woman, specifically a woman, by his side, both for public image and as somebody who offered emotional support, somebody he trusted and could rely on. Mary certainly was that.

Did he also say it because it helped misdirect speculations about his actual lifestyle? Oh, of course. That part would have been such a natural thing for him to do, something he would have done instinctively and constantly - the hiding of his true self - that he would have done it quite without thinking.

#ask response #Freddie Mercury #Jim Hutton #Mary Austin #marriage #same-sex marriage #internalised homophobia

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purplerose244 · 3 years

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My thoughts on Seabound!!! 🌊🌊🌊 (1/4)

SPOILERS ALERT!!!

Finally Nya's season! Our queen, our water goddess, our amazing girl gets what she deserves! 😍😍😍

What I know about the season beforehand is that Nya's powers apparently are getting problematic for some reasons? Which is a pretty common topic in other shows but it's a first in Ninjago, usually the elemental powers don't have focus and I LOVE that we now get to see stuff like that 💕💕💕

I know there should be Wojira involved, trusting The Island to deliver that little foreshadowing at the end of the episode 🤷‍♀️ Also Maya is back... MAYA IS FINALLY BACK AFTER SEVEN SEASONS YES!!! 😭😭😭

I have nothing else to say, I have no idea what this will bring, hopefully something as good as Master of the Mountain! 🖤

Alright, here we go!

GENERAL THOUGHTS

Warning reader, I might be fangirling to an extreme because I love mah girl Nya and I've been wanting Kai and Nya's parents to be back ever since Hands of Time ended. So yeah... screaming alert 😅

At this point I don't doubt that the intro is great, we reached such a level of animation and we got The Fold 😍😍 Love the marine vibe and how it's similar to The Island, because it's a great intro 👌

NOW I like the writing! Maybe they rushed the dialogue's quality for The Island to get here? It's just fun and in character, maybe it's just me but I'm enjoying it a lot for now

How many episodes are in this? Wiki says ten, then I checked again and it's sixteen like with Master of Mountain... eh, it looks good so far so it's fine whatever happens 🤷‍♀️

A BIG SPLASH

Oohhh, new villain! One that uses... flames... huh, does she know there's literally a master of fire in the ninja team? Eh whatever she looks cute, give it up for Miss Demeanor!! 👏👏

Wait... OMG IS THAT ERIN MATTHEWS??? WE GOT MACY!! ❤❤❤

Whoa, we're finding out where did the order of the vengestone from season 13 come from?? YAS! CONTINUITY!

Yep, there it is, Nya lost control... her attacks look so cool 😍

Lol that kid trying to be a nindroid and Zane being offended 😂😂 Sorry hun, you're that popular

Aaahhh, thank you Ninjago! You gave me back Nya the perfectionist 😂 I was worried her reaction to her powers wasn't going to be in character but it looks fair so far. Brings me back to Possession, my favorite season 💙💙💙

WE GOT BACK THE FACT THAT SHE CAN MAKE IT RAIN!!! YAS!!! I might be easy to please but I love these details 🤩

🤯🤯🤯 Okay they are definitely going somewhere this time and I LOVE IT, because wow. WOW. Are we actually addressing the forever questioned fact that wind and water weren't elements that Chen needed at the Tournament? Are we giving a reason for them to exist outside the main set of elements and the elemental masters?? Duuuude, season 15 don't let me stop you, keep going 😍

Mm, so water and wind are connected to Wojira (now I see the connection with the special). Are we setting the ground for a new master of wind? 😏😏 It's risky going for a Morro replacement but it's a super intriguing idea! Oooor Edgy Boy TM might come back? WHO KNOWS I'M CURIOUS ANYWAY 🤩

Love how it is universal knowledge that Nya is super indipendent 👌

YES YES FINALLY WE'RE TALKING ABOUT MAYA!!! 😍😍😍 Is it too much hoping into a Ray cameo as well?? Pleaaaase? Also addressing Krux after so many seasons, this feels exciting!! 😊

This is what I'm talking about, training, fighting scenes, show me everything that water goddess can do! 🌊🌊🌊

Aaahhh, Nya flexing her mightiness through anger, just to remind us that she is the descendant of a water master as much as of a fire master 😅

YES YES YES YES IT'S HAPPENING FINALLY AFTER SEVEN SEASON THE FIRE WATER PARENTS ARE FINALLY BACK!!! 🔥🌊🔥🌊🔥🌊 I'M SO HAPPY I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR SO LONG!!! 😭

RAY IS THERE TOO HECK YES!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 I shouldn't get this excited at only the first episode... WHO CARES RAY IS BAAAAACK!!! ❤❤❤

Omg Maya is definitely different from what I expected, turns out Kai's enthusiasm came from her 😂

Oh look at my flame babe 😍

He's so happy his parents are here, he's a total family man ❤❤❤

Nya is maaaaad... 😅

THERE SHE IS

WELCOME BACK JILLIAN I MISSED YOU 💚💚💚 Would it be too much having a "Your voice sounds familiar" moment with Maya and Lloyd? 😂

I'm so stoked for this! I want all the interactions I've missed for all of this time, asap!! HECK yes!! 😍😍😍😍

Oh, are we looking over the Miss Demeanor, vengestone situation? Mm... for now at least... WHO CARES FIRE WATER PARENTS!! 🔥🌊🔥🌊🔥🌊

THE CALL OF THE DEEP

Imma just slow clap for The Fold because this is another amazing intro, one of those things in this show that stays awesome no matter what happens 👍👍

So Maya gave Nya her discipline and perfectionism, but not the passion behind it 😂 I like this, it's not your conventional master of water, although I'd say it's different from the impression she gave me back in HoT. Maybe this is how she is when she's not trapped for fifty years? 😅😅

Is it too much asking for Kai and Ray bonding while the water women get the work done? 😅😅

Is this the sequel of Green Eggs and Ham?

Green Pancakes and Ham? 😂

Oh it's seaweed nevermind... at breakfast? I'm all for sushi rolls but this is a little 😅 Although since Maya missed their childhood she probably never cooked meals for them... how did I get myself sad 😢

Whoa, Maya is a strict teacher! I got flashbacks from my first and only dance lesson, teachers nitpicking every single pose, uuurrrggg I feel ya waterlily 😡

Again, not a fan of Misako, but coming from her the whole speech about wanting to be there for her child makes a lot of sense

Yes. YES.

YEEEEESSSS KAI AND RAY FAMILY BONDING THIS IS EVERYTHING I'VE EVER WANTED I'M GETTING ALL OF MY WISHES GRANTED FOR THIS ONE ❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤🔥❤

AND MY FLAME BABE IS SO GLAD HE GOT HIS PARENTS!!! 😭😭😭

Lol with Kai's new hair they look even more related 🤣

Ray also sounds so happy he gets to have his moment with his son 😢 I feel so blessed in this moment 👍

Also this scene makes a lot of sense. Nya grew up to be indipendent, one that succeed in most of stuff without problems, she built her life without any help and doesn't look for it. Kai grew up more insecure, he got some walls up but loves to take care of others and be taken care of. With a childhood lost he looks forward to a bit of softness ❤❤

Did Maya make real bacon for that sandwich? Do I smell some favoritism? 😅 Or maybe she really wants Nya to get onto the water mind setting idk 🤷‍♀️

Little tiny complain, why isn't Jay doing the fixing? Did he give up mechanics completely? It feels like we haven't seen him do tech stuff in so long, I miss techy boy in action 😞

And no, having to check on the bathroom doesn't count 😅

Aww robot date 💜🤍💜🤍

AAAHH ROBOT DISASTER 😱😱😱 ZANE DANG IT YOU WERE DOING SO GOOD NOT TRYING TO DIE IN THE LAST TWO SEASONS!!

Oh that was weird, weird magic purple wave thingie?

I DID NOT ASK FOR A SEASON WITH A BEST GIRL AT THE EXPENCE OF ANOTHER BEST GIRL PIX DON'T YOU DARE DO THIS TO ME 😱😱😱😱😱

"Well this is troubling." I love this samurai so freaking much 💜💜💜

GUYS THIS IS ONLY THE SECOND EPISODE, I'M A LITTLE SCARED NOW 😢

Okay Nya admitting that something's wrong looking so apologetic, girl you don't need to do that you already own my heart 😭

Alright, I'm guessing this is Wojira's power or something, and they will have to go down below and find out why... just throwing this in, maybe Maya did something? Because she wanted to finally be with her family and needed an excuse? JUST A THEORY WITH NO BASE I REALLY HOPE I'M WRONG!!!

Okay, two episodes and I'm BEYOND engaged, let's keep it up! 😍

UNSINKABLE

Getting an idea how this episode might end already 😂😂

Look, I love best girl Pixal, but I'm kinda sad that she seems to be the only one tinkering at this point. Like, I saw Nya fix little stuff, while Jay dropped engineering altogether, I miss my engineers team 😭

Aww, the guys didn't want to crush Pixal's dream of an unsinkable boat 💜 But honestly yeah, I agree with Cole, this might end badly 😅😅

Thank goodness

I was worried they forgot about Jaya ❤💙❤💙 Jay is such a cutie omg

Nya: Mm, going on a potentially dangerous mission with unstable powers in the heart of my element or... mom's tofu pancakes... *yeets herself over the ship*

I'm making too many screenshots of the Smith family... WHO CARES THEY ARE BACK AND THEY ALL LOOK SO GOOD!!! 😍😍😍😍

Aww Ray wants to play with his son and his friends so CUTE ❤❤❤ Still can't believe they play Prime Empire after everything that went down 😂😂

Whoa whoa whoa, Kai and Cole are sitting this one out? That's actually interesting, I'm pretty sure I saw Cole's scuba suit in the sets though so I didn't expect it... lol it's actually kinda fair that the two that used to be afraid of water aren't going 😂😂

Bet Kai is happy to stay behind because he gets to spend time with his dad 😭

Also studying the fire elementals?? Uhm, yes please?? TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT MY FLAME BABE!!! 😍😍😍😍

I'm sure this one scene...

... made so many lavashippers happy ❤🖤❤🖤 Cole you got Ray's blessing

Ninja team acting cool while Jay is being Jay, it's how it always goes, it's the entire show's description and I absolutely love it 😂 That wink though 💙

PIRATE ZANE IS BACK 😂😂😂 Haven't seen him since Possession, and this time he's not even malfunctioning 👌 Pixal is so done with his dorky boyfriend 😝

Of course Jay already has a ghost butler theory going on 😂

OF COURSE IT'S MAYA 😂😂

To be honest muffins would sold me too 😅 Not sure if she will make them out of tofu again though...

It's actually really interesting that we still haven't met the actual enemies, it does build up excitment! Very curious about these squid guys 👍

Well what do you know, the Unsinkable sank. Who would have thought?

... yeah same, sorry Pix 😅

FIVE THOUSANDS FATHOMS DOWN

Aaaahhh, Nya fixing stuff! That's more like it!! 😍😍

Oww, that one speech, I've been waiting for so long for that! Maya just wants to catch up with her daughter and it's not her fault she was separated from her children, but Nya did everything on her own with Kai. Only fair she isn't seeking for her help right now... still sad 😢

Pff, with this ninja team there's not a moment of privacy 😂😂

Maya cleaning his future son-in-law's laundry what the HECK 😂😂😂 To be fair Jay has a bit of a history of having to change underwears during sea travels 😝

Zane was attached to a battery? When?... are you talking about that one scene in Prime Empire? Cause that's not really a flashback I wanna ha- whoops never mind got the flashback 😱

Maya looks more calm now, I think she's trying to act more reasonable and she's got good points 👍 I know people were a little weirded out by how more cheerful she looks in comparison to Hands of Time, but I think she gets the most serious and rational when time needs. That's actually fascinating of her 🤔

CALLING OUT AN ATTEMPTED MURDER

THIS GIRL IS TOO GORGEOUS MY HEART CAN'T TAKE IT 🤩🤩🤩 Like my gosh that smirk, what the heck Pix 💜💜💜

Okay but Jay looking at Nya until the doors are completely closed?? CAN YOU FEEL MY JAYA HEART BEATING?? ❤💙❤💙

Whoa green gas I thought this was Nya's season 😂

MAYA WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS STUFF YOU'RE SCARING ME 😱😱😱 I SWEAR LEGO IF YOU BROUGHT BACK WATER MOM JUST TO KILL HER OFF I'M GONNA SUE YOU 😭😭😭

I really REALLY like the atmosphere of the entrante of the temple! Super sealike and ancient! 🌊🌊🌊

Maya: off we go, into the spooky old temple! (Why does it feel like something Kai would say? 😂)

Oh gee, someone sleeping in the deep, who could that be? Coff Wojira coff

Whoa the jellyfishes look pretty lifelike!

HERE HE COMES

WELCOME BACK GILES!!! ONCE AGAIN ON A LEGO SHOW I MISSED YOU SO MUCH YOU AND YOUR GODLIKE VOICE!!! 😍😍😍😍 Gosh he's a villain but he's got Clay's voice, how can I even try to hate him?? 😅

Alright, knocking down my water girls, that is pretty hateful material... BUT CLAAAYYY 💙💙💙

So they need the two amulets to wake up Wojira? Isn't one on the island? Fire dad and son coming to the rescue? WHO KNOWS BUT I'M ENJOYING THIS A LOT SO FAR KEEP GOING SEABOUND 😍😍😍

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codenamesazanka · 3 years

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Warning: Rant, character bashing, lots of opinions

I'm saying it outright. I hate Deku. He is entirely underwhelming as a character, much less as the main character, the shonen protagonist of the series.

It's a 'different' type of dislike, though. I feel like I could've like his character. There's nothing greatly disagreeable about him, he's as inoffensive as can be, he's an optimistic, considerate, and polite boy, he's as plain as he is said to be, and that's fine.

My issue is that he's not the character he's said to be. I, personally, just don't buy that he "possesses a drive to save others that eclipses all common understanding", or that he's super intelligent with great analytical abilities that he actually applies on the battlefield, or, in general, he's as amazing or heroic or compassionate as he's apparently supposed to be. How can he be inspiring if he barely challenges any aspects of the society he lives in. Deku is a super good example of the terrible use of "Tell, Don't Show". We're told about his amazing traits, but he rarely follows through; when we do see hints of it, it's lauded but frankly I think it's typical behavior and (this though is not quite his fault) written so stiffly and awkwardly I'm not convinced.

(Honestly I might even call him a Canon Mary Sue. He has no interesting or distinguishable flaws, unless having a shit for brains attitude is one but that's not acknowledged by the narrative. Breaking bones is not a personality trait. If he has a Hero Complex, it's not even the interesting ones where he fucks things up even more; or carries crippling guilt about circumstances beyond his control; or focuses completely on saving people to the point of rejecting almost all human connections and keeping deadly secrets - which is All Might's big flaw.) (Well fair, he does this in the most recent chapter but did it need to take 300+ chapters? Plus I sense the way it's framed is that it's the radical, but right course of action.)

Say what you want about Villains and redemption/shouldn't be redeemed/too evil to be saved/justice/etc, but I think this 'Incredible Drive To Save' should've included Villains from the start. Why does Deku want to "Save people with a smile on his face"? Assuming it's empathy, he should have felt some towards everyone he encounters, whether it's sensible or not. "Why are you so angry?", "You shouldn't go about things this way", "What caused them to be like this?", "Why is there evil in the world?" even. I'm still fuming over his Mall Encounter with Shigaraki, where Shigaraki pretty much reveals his damage: "All Might acts like there's no one he can't save"; but ultimately Deku goes "Wow, that sure is an opinion."

What kind of inane response is this??? There's little pushback from the narrative either, so this isn't pointed out as a failing of his (because, again, he has no big flaws). And he's supposed to be smart and caring. Yes, he does ask All Might right after the Mall Encounter, "Was there anyone you can't save?"; but essentially the replies he gets is "Don't worry about it" and Deku immediately largely puts it out of his mind "Oh whew, I was about to do some introspection and reflection". There isn't even the daunting, kinda-existential anxiety that people get when they realize it's impossible to save/help everyone - which is something, like, medical workers have to learn to deal with - that sharp sense of the inevitably of death, of loss, failure, guilt. I'm not asking for him to come to the conclusion that everyone should be saved - he could've decided nah, Shigaraki is too ugly to be saved and I would've been fine with that, it's part of the character role and potential development - just that he should've had a conclusion at all.

There are the latest chapters where Deku decides he wants to try saving Shigaraki first (though killing him is still on the table), true. Him wanting to save Shigaraki after seeing AFO merged with him, after seeing The Crying Child - but see, I don't think it qualifies because I think it's the bare minimum about of consideration, the typical response to seeing the body horror of warped, fused flesh, to seeing a small sad little boy. I think it shouldn't require "You look like you needed saving" for a true Hero to consider saving someone. Not for someone who is supposed to be unique and special in this regard.

I've complained about this before, but the trouble with Deku was evident from the very beginning.

Again, Deku wants to save people with a smile on his face, and again, I’m assuming it’s empathy. We're shown this on the very first page, as he attempts to protect a friend(?) from bullies, but imo like it felt groundless because who was the kid he was protecting? We never see him again. Did Deku's standing up to Bakugou work, and the kid was saved? Or did they both got beaten up; but afterwards, being the kind boy Deku is supposed to be, he still gets to his feet to help the boy, to apologize for failing.

But more significantly, this theme of saving was overshadowed immediately by his focus on superpowers - that he was quirkless. Next page, his focus was on ‘Woah, giant villain and superpowers!’ Instead of like. Helping people. (Though I chalk this up to early installment weirdness)

What should’ve happened if the theme was ‘SAVE PEOPLE’ Is something like: The opening sentence being “People are not born equal. This is the harsh truth I learned when I was four. I knew that... but despite my powerless, I still wanted to help. That was my first and last setback.” And the panels/images themselves (of little Katsuki and his friends) implies that people on the world thinks you need power to help people.

When he saw the villain attack on way to school, Deku can be wow’ed by the spectacle! But then he notices a kid crying and offers to help find his mom. He can be interrupted by a Hero saying he (the hero) will take over, he can find the mom and realize he’s late for school (and so that shows he’s willing to sacrifice something of his to help others! Because of his altruistic nature!). A scene like that, of him helping the lost kid, we would know that he wants to help *anyone*. At school, though, he still gets bullied for not having powers. So he’s mulling over that when he meets All Might, and asks the question.

It proceeds as usual for the next few events: When the sludge monster attacks Katsuki, he can still go gawk at the scene. He can still hesitate. In canon, it's only when he realized the victim was his friend that he jumps into action, which I thinks undermines the theme of 'wanting to save indiscriminately'. IMO, it would've been better that Deku sees it’s his friend, but he still hesitates. “There’s nothing I can do right? All Might himself said so...” But when he sees Katsuki’s *face* of fear, he runs to help. Instead of seeming like he helps only because he realizes it’s his friend, he helps because he feels too deeply about trying to save Katsuki.

Admittedly these are minor, personal critiques; but all in all, the first chapter fails to establish Deku is the willpowered, champion of wanting to save people he's supposed to be.

--Which is fine, if it's acknowledged in the story later, that maybe he wasn't the True Blue Hero he's supposed to be at first, but he can change and still become one. But it's not - Deku is apparently special, without anything special to show for it.

I read the one-shot "My Hero" - the prototype for this series - that Horikoshi published years ago, before My Hero Academia was created. I also found it underwhelming, but that was due to personal tastes (I wanted more explosions and dumb violence); as a story on it's own merit, the logic and progression was solid.

The Villains Heroes fought were 'Aberrations' - true inhuman monsters that showed no sentience that would eat people - so the focus could be solely on saving humans. The main character - Jack Midoriya - his original goal was less 'save people' and more 'become a cool hero', before learning that saving people is what true heroism is about, hero license unneeded. (Moreover, he really did 'save' someone without being a hero - by working hard, he was preventing the company from becoming ruined completely, which the CEO had confessed and thanked him for. )

This version of Midoriya didn't exactly needed deep empathy or compassion for that, just a strong willpower, which he effectively demonstrated by chasing after a childhood dream even as an adult salaryman in a tanking company, even though he had anemia and no training and no license. He insisted on this, to the point of getting hurt by being dumb, of being petty over someone dissing the Hero who inspired him in the first place, of skipping out of work and going vigilante. Not the most upstanding guy, but he came through in the relevant themes of the story, in being the character the story needed him to be.

Jack Midoriya was an unimpressive, weird-looking, weak, pitiful, somewhat selfish, awkward salaryman with no great aspects that 'eclipses all common understanding'. But he was a far stronger character than his incarnation Izuku Midoriya could ever be (so far).

#rant #nalslastworkingbraincell #character bashing #negativity #warning #I hope these tags are enough #:P

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jackcinephile · 3 years

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LO Fans: "I love Lore Olympus because it deals with serious themes, like sexual assault, abuse, gaslighting, trauma, and mental health issues!"

Me, who spent my life discovering and obsessing over masterpieces like this:

"You're gonna have to try a lot harder than that to impress me."

Yeah, I never understood that kind of praise. For one thing, people act like LO is groundbreaking for that reason, despite there being countless movies, books, tv shows, comics, and video games that also deal with the same themes. That isn't to say there can't be more stories like this, however. I, for one, am begging for another video game that comes close to the emotional resonance of Silent Hill 2, or for a faithful adaptation of Dracula and/or Phantom of the Opera, or for a horror movie as unsettling as The Howling! But to say any new story that deals with these themes is unique for doing so, is just simply not true. Lore Olympus is no more unique than any of these stories. Also, I don't understand the praise that Lore Olympus is great just by virtue of having these themes in the first place. Just because a story has serious themes, doesn't automatically make it good. Far too often does LO use its themes as a crutch for a plot that is standard issue among romances, as opposed to stories like The Howling, which has a very intriguing, outlandish plot that serves as a catalyst to explore themes of very real and relatable horror. Lore Olympus, without its intense themes, is just another story about the CEO falling in love with his intern. And don't get me wrong, I LOVE those kinds of stories, but Lore Olympus just doesn't really do it for me. And the poorly executed themes just hamper it even further for me.

If it wasn't already apparent, has anyone noticed a pattern between these titles? All but one are horror stories. In my opinion, that is one of the key differences between them and LO: Horror! The themes within, are ones that illicit terror, and the stories reflect that (even Phantom of the Opera--don't listen to anyone who says it's a romance). Starting with Dracula, one of the scenes that horrified me the most in the book was the one where Count Dracula sneaks into Mina's bedroom. The book describes him slitting open his own vein and forcing her to drink his blood. Mina then expresses feelings of violation, much akin to what rape survivors feel. It doesn't pull any punches in its shocking, horrific portrayal, but it never comes off as exploitative. That's because the best horror stories rely on the audience's empathy. In this case, nobody wants to feel violated, so we feel as horrified as the characters do when we read about this grotesque event. And because it is about illiciting fear through empathy, Dracula succeeds where Lore Olympus fails. Lore Olympus, before all else, is a romance. And rape should not be in a romantic story. Especially not when the narrative of LO uses this trauma to validate the relationship between the two leads. I'm not a fan of stories that use trauma to validate a relationship between romantic interests, and I think that partly stems from reading the Phantom of the Opera.

If you ask me, Phantom of the Opera is one if the best books to discuss abuse and gaslighting ever written! Despite misconceptions generated by the popularity of the musical, PotO is very much a horror story with hardly any romance at all. And it's one of the best examples about why using trauma to validate a romance is a very bad idea! You see, all the conflict of the story begins with The Phantom and his trauma. He was born with multiple physical deformities that cause him to look like a living corpse. Because of this, he is despised and rejected by the world in order to escape the hatred of the world, he commissions the construction of the Paris Opera House, complete with intricate catacombs where he can live out the rest of his miserable days. Then one day, a woman named Christine comes to work at the Opera as a chorus girl. She is sad and alone due to her being orphaned, without a friend in the world. She too is emotionally damaged and the Phantom thinks this means she'll understand him. The trouble begins instantly when he claims to be a character from a folktale that Christine's father used to tell her. This is when the manipulation and gaslighting begins. Part of what makes this so effective is how we see it from an outside perspective. The protagonist, Raoul, is in love with Christine and we get to see his confusion and growing concern when he starts realizing Christine is showing signs of an abusive relationship. What makes the relationship even worse is the fact that Christine actually does understand The Phantom. So she doesn't run away not only out of fear, but also compassion. She knows what it's like to feel isolated and dead to the world and The Phantom uses that against her. The more I describe this, the more parallels I begin to see to Hades' and Minthe's relationship. Yes, Minthe abused Hades in much of the same way as The Phantom abused Christine. Notice how Minthe keeps convincing Hades that they're the only people who understand each other, even going so far as to say, "We're the same." The funny thing is, that's exactly what the narrative uses to validate Hades' and Persephone's relationship! It tries to establish that Hades and Persephone relate to each other and they say, several times, "We're the same," to each other. But this is exactly how Hades got stuck in a toxic relationship with Minthe, so why is it suddenly okay now? Relationships that use shared trauma to validate themselves are almost always doomed to become toxic, in one way or another.

So what about the healthy relationship in Phantom of the Opera? Well, it's kinda interesting actually. You see, Christine eventually comes to realize that she needs help, so she turns to the protagonist, Raoul, to get her away from the Phantom. Raoul has an interesting character arc because he starts the novel being pretty immature and kinda selfish. He doesn't really take Christine's feelings into consideration. It's more like a boy chasing his childhood crush (actually that's exactly what happens). However, over the course of the story, as he becomes increasingly concerned with her well-being, he learns to care more about her feelings and her needs. This culminates in the climax, when he's willing to crawl through hell itself for her sake. I bring all this up because I wanted to compare Raoul with Hades as well. Hades is a very consistent character. He doesn't need an arc like Raoul because, from the very beginning, he's willing to put all of Persephone's needs before his, to a fault! That is his entire purpose within the narrative of LO. He exists to serve Persephone. Raoul didn't exist to serve Christine. He had his own journey of growing and maturing. And Christine didn't exist to serve Raoul either. It bothers me that a novel from 1910 has a more well-rounded relationship than a modern comic! Actually, now that I think about it, isn't Persephone's entire character arc supposed to be her learning that she shouldn't exist to serve others? Well, that totally contradicts Hades' role in the story, doesn't it? He exists to serve her! I guess, in the eyes of LO, it's only okay if men serve women, but not for women to serve men. Newsflash: neither is okay.

Now Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931) remains, to this day, one of the most terrifying movies I've ever seen! That's all thanks to its brutal depictions of domestic abuse. So Dr. Henry Jekyll believes the solution to enlightening the human race is to separate the good and evil in our souls. He solves this problem by creating a drug to do just that, which transforms him into Edward Hyde, but he becomes addicted and starts terrorizing a woman who was once a former patient of his. I think what makes this so effective, when compared to LO, is one simple factor: Fear. I am terrified of Edward Hyde, but whenever Apollo shows up, I'm just annoyed. That's because Hyde isn't being used to sell an agenda, while Apoll is. Apollo is all about making a statement about toxic masculinity, which always bothered me from the very beginning! Being an abusive cunt who rapes women has nothing to do with masculinity! It doesn't matter if you're masculine or feminine, anyone can be a cunting abusive rapist. If you are a rapist, it's because you're a monster who lacks empathy, not because of masculinity. And if you think masculinity has something to do with a lack of empathy, fuck off! Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is not about toxic masculinity. It's about how drug addiction can often hurt other people around us just as much, if not moreso, than ourselves. It also doesn't use rape to validate a relationship between characters. I'm sorry, but that is just the laziest storytelling technique. When the antagonist is a rapist OF COURSE the male love interest is going to look better by comparison! But when you take Apollo out of the equation, Hades stops looking like a desirable love interest real fucking quick.

So yeah, I think Hades makes for a bad love interest. That's mostly because he's so much like Shinji Ikari from Neon Genesis Evangelion. Yeah, the one title from the list above that's not a horror, but is no less relevant. The thing is, both Hades and Shinji have a lot in common, such as hating themselves, having a bad relationship with their father, and not caring at all about their own wants and needs. Oh, also Asuka's a better written character than Minthe, but that's a whole other topic. What makes Evangelion work, in my opinion, is that Shinji's whole journey is about learning to love himself, while Hades is portrayed as being perfect the way he is. Hades in LO is like a flawless beacon of virtue, solely because he worships the ground Persephone walks on. But the guy just doesn't care about himself at all! Like I said earlier, Hades guilty of the same self-destructive behaviors as Persephone but he's praised for it, while Persephone is encouraged to look after herself more often. Compare this to Shinji, whose life only gets worse the more he neglects himself. The only time Hades does something beneficial for himself is when he breaks up with Minthe, but immediately after that, he starts devoting every ounce of energy to Persephone! All that matters is her! He doesn't give a single fuck about himself. Sorry, but that's not good qualities in a male love interest. In all fairness, this is a problem with the romance genre as a whole. Most romances give priority to the protagonist (in this case Persephone) while neglecting the love interest (Hades). It's why I have a serious problem with the entire genre.

Now what could Silent Hill 2 have that is in any way relevant to Lore Olympus? Two words: Nightmare Fuel. Personifying trauma as literal demons is one of the smartest ideas anyone's ever had, because speaking from personal experience, that's how it feels. I just don't feel like the trauma experienced by the characters in LO is a waking nightmare like it is in real life. For one, the characters' trauma only pops up when it's convenient for the plot. Like whenever Persephone starts experiencing ptsd, it happens when she's with Hades so we can get a scene with Hades cuddling her. After that, it shows up in a scene to make her look badass by confronting Apollo. No, just no. The Howling did it better too, by making the protagonist's trauma such an inconvenience in her life! I never felt that way in LO. When you uss traumatic encounters to make your character look like a badass, kindly fuck off.

#lore olympus

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g0ttal0ve101 · 3 years

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Eddie in Wonderland (Part 3 ❤️🖤)

There sat a beautiful table full of tea pots, tea cups, cookies, candies, anything that a child could wish for to have the perfect tea party. Eddie rushed up to the table, letting out a soft 'wow' before feeling two hands grab his shoulders tightly. Eddie froze up from the touch, feeling his heart drop all the way to the ground and splattering on his shoes.

"Hello, dear child. Would you like some tea?"

Eddie shuddered at the voice before turning around to face the man who owned it. "I-I'm sorry, did I interrupt?"

"No, you're just fine. Have a seat, dear." The Mad Hatter coaxed, pulling him a chair out to sit in. Eddie hesitantly sat down, looking up at the man with a worried expression. He sat down across from the boy, grabbing the tea pot and pouring some tea in a small flower cup. "Would you like some tea?"

Eddie nodded slowly with a slight smile. "Yes, thank you..."

"May I ask your name? And perhaps where you're headed?" He asks, handing him the steaming tea cup.

"Ah, my name is Eddie..." he softly replies, grabbing the cup. "And...I'm trying to find a whit-"

"Eddie? What a lovely name for a lovely boy. Here, drink up."

"...What is your name?" Eddie questions.

"I'm the Mad Hatter, but you may call me Danny." He quickly told him. "Now, drink up. Drink up! Would you like some sugar? Milk?"

The ginger grew concerned and a bit uneasy about how pushy the man was being towards drinking the tea. He peered down at the liquid, seeing it looked pretty safe. "No, I'm fine...thank you for asking..." He then took a sip, finding that this didn't taste of tea at all, more like alcohol. He coughed a little, only to see Danny staring at him.

"Does it taste good? More sugar? More milk?"

"A-Ah..." Eddie coughed again. "I-I don't think this is t-tea..."

"More sugar, I see." Danny takes the cup away and begins pouring sugar into it, at least, Eddie thought it was sugar. "Here, try it now." He hands it back to the boy, only for the liquid to taste totally different.

Eddie smiles softly, nodding. "This tastes much better, thank you." Danny watched the boy drink intensely, making sure he got each and every last drop of it. After he was done, the boy began to feel dizzy and bubbly. "Ahhh...what type of tea was that...?"

"Did you like it?"

"Hehe...yeahhh..." Eddie looked around obliviously, finding everything was mixed colors and sparkles. He was incredibly happy at the sight of it, leaning back in his chair while hiccuping. "Hehe...hahahahaha...hahaha! Hahahahaha!"

Danny stood up, approached the boy slowly, and grabbed his face. Eddie was in no condition to realize how creepy the man was being, giggling constantly at him. To Eddie, he began to look more and more like his father. "Now, those eyes of yours are so beautiful. Hazy and dark..."

"Hahaha!"

"Like you've lost yourself. Like you're mad."

"Hahahahaha! Hahahahahaha!"

Danny grabs the boy's hand, lifting him up out of his chair. "Come, I rarely have guests. I would love to examine those eyes more."

"Father," Eddie spoke cheerfully. "why would you wanna see my eyes? They aren't even that pretty! Hahaha!"

"They're beautiful, Eddie. Now, we must hurry. That 'tea' won't last very long, no, not at all."

"Huhhh? What are you talking abouttt?" Eddie wobbled his way towards the other side of the table, following the Mad Hatter. "I dunno whatttt...sgghhh...waaa..."

"Hush, now. I'll make this quick."

"Huhhh? Whaaat?" Eddie questions, feeling himself being pushed against the biggest chair at the end of the table. He then saw Danny grab an eating utensil off of the table, supposedly a spoon, and holding him down by his chest. Eddie felt a sudden change of mood and began to struggle away. "No! No! No!"

"Is it already wearing off-?"

"NO! LET ME GO! LET ME GO, YOU HOOLIGAN!" Eddie cried, kicking the man in the chest and flinging himself onto the table. Danny was stunned for only a moment before grabbing Eddie's ankle and yanking him back. "NO! NO! LET ME GO!"

"Have some more tea."

"MOM! DAD?! AL! PLEASE, SOMEONE! ANYONE!" Eddie screamed, kicking and pulling away from the man. "PLEASE!"

Suddenly, as if he had heard his cries, the white rabbit jumps onto the table laughing hysterically. Eddie felt a lump in his throat, almost wishing he hadn't screamed at all; Not if this man was going to kill him instead.

"YOU AGAIN, FIVE EYES?! GIVE ME A BREAK! YOU ALREADY TRY TO GET QUEEN RAY'S EYES!" He hissed at Danny. He let Eddie go, only for Zack to pick the little boy up instead. "AHAHAHA! DO SOMETHIN LIKE THAT AGAIN AND I'LL TEAR ALL YER EYES OUT!"

"Mister. Rabbit!" Eddie gushed with a grin.

"OI, DON'T BE GETTIN HAPPY ALL OF A SUDDEN! THAT REALLY TICKS ME OFF!"

"I was merely trying to checkup on his eyes!" Danny exclaimed, hiding the spoon behind his back with a sickening smile. "Believe me!"

"NOT FOR A SECOND, YA PERV!" Zack jumps from the table, holding Eddie like a sack of potatoes, and running out the back gate. Danny called for the two to come back, but neither of them had the intention to.

"Mister. Bunny-!"

"Call me Zack, lil-shit!"

"Mister. Zack!"

"ZACK!"

"No formalities?"

"WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN, RICH BOY?!"

Eddie laughed at the rabbit-man's response, shaking his head. "Nevermind that! Where are we going?"

"The castle. I'm late, remember?!" Zack grumbled, swinging from branch to branch. This confused Eddie a bit, since he was supposed to be a rabbit, not a monkey.

"Oh! Yes, I do remember you saying something of the sorts."

"UGH, YA SPEAK TOO PROPER!"

"My apologies."

Eddie then remembered his stolen mask, peering at Zack's back pockets to see if it was there. However, there was no sight of it. Before he could question the bandaged man, he was dropped straight on his back. He looked up at Zack, only to see he was entering a large metal gate which led to the castle. "See ya later, lil-shit."

"Wait! My mask! Could you give it back?!" Zack doesn't answer, rushing through the entrance of the castle's garden. Eddie stood up and brushed himself off, walking inside of the beautifully decorated gate that the man had left open stupidly. Eddie shut the gate behind himself to make sure no one else could enter the castle grounds, since it was common sense. He then began to chase Zack once more. "Please! I really need it back!"

Eddie tripped over a can of red paint, spilling it out on the grass and landing face-first onto the ground. He rubbed his forehead, small tears forming in his eyes from the hit. "Ouch..."

"Ah! I'm so sorry! So sorry!"

"That voice..." Eddie's head perked up as he turns to see the boy who spoke to him. As he suspected, it was his older brother, Carl. Immediately after realizing it was him, he began sobbing. "CARL! WAAAAAAHHHH!" He grabbed onto Carl and pulled him in for a hug, ignoring the fact that he was dressed as a soldier.

"Uh-do I know you?" Carl asks, pulling the boy away from his grasp.

Eddie's eyes widen as he hears that question. "Carl...we're...brothers...! Do you not remember me?!"

Carl tilts his head, giving Eddie an odd look. "Uhm...dude. I have no idea who you are."

Eddie stood up and wiped his tears away, holding his head in his hands. "Oh goodness...I must be dreaming...!"

Carl grabs the bucket of paint and ran off towards two other soldiers that were with him. One was rather small, looking to be around six and the other was tall, looking to be sixteen. Eddie recognized them to be his brothers, George, Albert, and Carl, but they didn't seem to have the slightest clue who he was. So, instead of continuing to push them to remember, he decided to play it cool and go along with what they were doing.

"What are you three doing?" Eddie asks the boys.

"We're painting the roses red!" The littlest one, George, boomed happily. "We planted the wrong ones, so now we gotta fix them before the Queen comes and cuts off our heads!"

Eddie felt his heart splatter when he heard that. "What?!"

Albert, the oldest one, paid no mind to Eddie, continuing to paint. Carl grabbed George and led him onto a stool to paint more roses, explaining to Eddie. "That's right...we have to paint them red before we lose our heads!"

"Let me help then!" Eddie grabbed a paint brush and a bucket of paint, beginning to do the same. They all were panicked and rushing, hoping that they'd be done on time. Eddie didn't know the time limit, so made sure he did them quickly without really paying much mind to how good they looked. Little George couldn't do them very well either, considering his age, so some of them looked quite messy.

"Are you sure none of you know who I am?" Eddie asks while continuing to paint.

"You look like one of us, but no." Carl reported. He didn't take his eyes off of the brush, doing his best to paint every spot.

"Mhm! You do, you do!" George sang.

Eddie then heard some trumpets in the distance, seeing all of the color drain from his brother's faces. All three of them looked like they were terrified, hiding the paint and getting on their hands and knees, bowing. Eddie got down too, seeing that it would be silly to stay up. He gazed at his brothers, seeing that Carl was crying and the other two looked mortified. Was it really this fatal to have the roses red?

Suddenly, a whole army of soldiers lined up against the bushes and a red carpet was laid on the ground. The soldiers all had burlap masks on, exactly like the one that was stolen from Eddie. Confused, he looked up to see a beautiful young lady walking down the carpet and towards the four boys. Her dark crystal eyes were gleaming down the bushes, no facial expression was visible on her face. Carl began crying even more, which made George start to cry. Eddie knew that something was wrong.

Another trumpet was played, showing the rabbit-man who was playing it. "Announcing the Queen of Hearts! Or whatever..." he spat.

The Queen approached the four boys, coldly staring at them. "Who painted the roses red?" She bluntly asks, with no emotion at all. Her voice was quite pretty, but at the moment, Eddie dreaded it.

"I-It was my fault..." Carl lowered his head, tears streaming down his freckled cheeks.

"It was my fault." Albert looked up at the Queen with a harsh glare. "Don't believe that idiot."

"A-Al!" Carl sobbed, only to have Albert shove his head to the ground.

"IT WAS ME! DON'T KILL MY LITTLE BROTHERS FOR SOMETHING I DID!" Albert thundered, now having tears rapidly streaming down his face. "I DID IT! SO JUST LEAVE THEM-!"

"Off with their heads."

Eddie's head snapped up. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. His three brothers all were surrounded and dragged away, seemingly to their demise.

"NO, PLEASE NO! IT WAS MY FAULT! DON'T KILL THEM! DON'T-NO! THEY'RE JUST BABIES!" Albert screeched on the top of his lungs, begging for the Queen to let his little brother's go. However, the Queen didn't even bat an eye at his cries.

Eddie knew that he had to take action. These were his brothers afterall. Hearing them cry for mercy was enough to drive the young boy mad. "WAIT! STOP!"

The whole garden went silent. The crying stopped, the soldiers stopped, and the Queen stared at Eddie with her cold eyes. Before he could say another word, the Queen lifted his chin with her finger to get a better look at his gorgeous face. "Oh, a little boy."

"Y-Yes..." Eddie stuttered, standing up and panicking. "Please, don't k-kill them! Uhmmm...th-they're my brothers...a-and..."

The Queen's long golden hair danced behind her from the wind, staring deep into Eddie's ivy green eyes. He kept eye contact to let her know he was serious about this matter. With a small sigh, the Queen lifted a hand and the soldiers let his brothers go. "All three of you, get out of my sight."

Without another word, Albert picked little George up and grabbed Carl's hand, running away with them. Eddie remained standing tall, feeling completely overpowered by the girl. However, he didn't want that to show, so tried his best to keep his calm. "You, come with me."

Eddie followed the Queen's order, staying close behind her like a lost puppy. Each and every soldier stared at Eddie, almost sympathetically. Now Eddie felt really nervous.

"Now, where do you come from and where are you going?" The Queen asked.

"W-Well...I'm trying to find my way home-!"

"Your way? It's my way." She snapped, her blue eyes looking piercing.

"Y-Yes, you're right, b-but I was thinking-!"

"Bow when you're thinking. It saves more time."

"Yes, your majesty..." Eddie bows.

"No need to call me in formalities. I like you. You may call me Rachel." She informs him before beginning to walk again.

"O-Okay, I was only g-going to ask you-!"

"I ask the questions," Rachel grabs Eddie's hand, giving him a fake smile. "Do you dance?"

"Why, yes, your maj-I mean, Rachel." Eddie stammered, flustered by the touch. He was rarely touched so gently after all. Her hands felt like ice, just as her stare and heart. She leads him inside the ball room, many soldiers following behind.

"I would like you to dance with me," Rachel spoke in a tender tone, placing one of her hands on his cheek. "You are very charming...what was your name?"

"Edward...but people call me Eddie more often..." he blushed heavily, looking away. "You may call me whatever you'd like..."

"Eddie..." Rachel repeated slowly placing her hand on his shoulder and grabbing his other one. "What a beautiful name."

Eddie looked away briefly before placing his hand on her hip and holding her hand. "Thank you, R-Rachel..."

"Music." Rachel hissed at the servants, only for them to run and put it on. She smiled at Eddie once more, beginning to dance with him. It would be a lie for him to say he didn't enjoy it, but he was terrified of messing up. Her hands were so small and her stare was adoring but cold. She really seemed like a doll that a little girl would own. He peered away from her eyes for a moment, seeing that Zack was tearing up his mask for all to see. Eddie felt an overwhelming sense of anger and fear, wanting it back as soon as possible.

"Ah, Rach-!"

"Hush now, Eddie."

"But-!"

"Hush."

"GIVE IT BACK!" Eddie finally yelled, letting go of Rachel and jumping onto Zack. He began biting and scratching, desperately wanting his burlap mask back. By the time he got ahold of it, it was almost completely destroyed. Eddie fell to his knees, holding the mask close to his chest and thinking about the day he got it. "W-Waaahh...I WANNA GO HOME!"

Zack picks Eddie up by the collar of his shirt, giving him a good punch to the stomach before throwing him back towards the Queen. Eddie held his stomach in pain, coughing violently.

"Off with his head."

"R-Rachel..." Eddie sobbed. "Please...I-I wanna...I WANNA GO HOME!"

The soldiers began to surround him, reaching out towards him to pick him up and drag him out. He shut his eyes tightly, knowing that he was doomed.

"Edward!"

Eddie opened his eyes with a small gasp, hearing his mother's voice calling for him. The soldiers were still reaching for him, so he quickly crawled underneath their legs and began running towards the voice. "Mother! Mother!" He cried, looking back to see a crowd of black and white suits chasing him.

"Edward!"

"MOMMA!" He sobbed, rushing through the tea party, the caterpillar's smoke, the flowerbed, the forest, all the way back to the small door where it all began. He slammed his hands against it, shaking the door knob violently. "LET ME OUT! LET ME GO! I WANNA GO HOME!"

"OFF WITH HIS HEAD!"

Eddie took one look back at everyone chasing him, letting out one more scream. "MOM!"

And just like that,

Eddie woke up.

"Edward, are you even listening-?!"

"MOMMA!" Eddie bawled, jumping into her arms and holding her tight. His mother was shocked from these sudden tears, but nevertheless, wiped them away. "M-Momma...*sniffle*...mommy..."

"It's alright, my dear." His mother coaxed, patting his head delicately. "Shhh..."

After a short while of comforting Eddie, his mother grabbed his hand and her book, patting his ginger locks once again. "Edward, it's nearly three o'clock. Time for tea."

Eddie picks Sadie up, holding her close to his chest with a small sniffle and sigh. "Yes, mother."

✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿

[Author's note: That took a long time and I am NOT editing a 6935 worded AU nOPE- I hope you all enjoyed! Sorry for not updating more frequently ♡♡♡]

The cast:

Eddie as Alice: Woah, okay. That was fun. I loved how proper and sweet he was! Such a kind gentleman throughout it all~❤

Zack as the White Rabbit: Okay, this fit him 👏so👏damn👏well👏 I loved writing his character throughout this! He was a wild card, that's for sure~❤

Shin as Twiddle Dee and Twiddle Dum: I just HAD to add these two in, they fit PERFECTLY. I hardly ever write about them in the first place, so this was a great opportunity! Never steal from a grave-keeper~❤

The girl as the White Rose: Loved this role for her, so sweet, so kind, so talented~❤

Cathy as the Caterpillar: Sass. Sass all day. Didn't even let my poor boy finish a sentence. ✋😔

Gray as the Cheshire Cat: THE CHESHIRE CAT WAS MY FAVORITE CHARACTER AND STILL IS (other than Alice) SO I LOVED WRITING HIS CHARACTER~❤

Danny as the Mad Hatter: Creepy. As. Crap. I made him creepy as much as possible, since I didn't want him to be TOTALLY crazy, still rational and smart. I did like writing his character as well~❤

Rachel as the Queen of Hearts: She slayed it 🖤❤🖤❤🖤

The Mason bros as the Soldiers: This made me tear up Q^Q They really do care for each other...❤

Old man as the doorknob: Almost forgot him! Ahhh, he was so heartwarming to write about! Yes, this is the old man from Zack's backstory! ❤

Thank you so much for reading, I love you all! ❤

#eddie in wonderland #angels of death au #eddie mason #albert mason #carl mason #george mason #danny dickens #zack foster #rachel gardner

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fancifulwhump · 4 years

Note

Pssst jaskier prompt if you're interested: I'm a sucker for geralt being soft and caring while refusing to acknowledge it - so a fic where there's something wrong with jaskier - maybe he fell into an icy lake, or is getting sick or something, and geralt takes care of him like a total tsundere? *angrily shoves blankets at him* *stoically checks his temperature* *gruffly makes him soup* *WE'RE NOT FRIENDS BUT ALSO I WILL SIT AT YOUR BEDSIDE NURSE YOU BACK TO HEALTH UNTIL YOUR SINGING AGAIN*

@hurt-comfort asked: Hey hey! Loving your writing. I'm @hurt-comfort. I would love ANY Jaskier whump (use any prompt on my blog). I'd love to see like, Geralt just needing to comfort Jas (because he WANTS to even though he has the social IQ of a potato.) "When the whumpee is in like a daze, just sitting and staring at nothing because of something traumatic. Then someone forces them to either eat, get changed, or just move. Like shellshock" and Geralt has to be like "Jaskier, listen, it's okay"

AN: okay, okay, there was a lot to work with here, but hopefully I hammered it into a scenario that makes sense? “Falls through thin ice” is such a great whump trope and also a real nightmarescape of mine, so… let’s all enjoy the trauma together, guys!!

It’s not as though Geralt doesn’t care. That isn’t it at all. If he cared less, Jaskier probably wouldn’t get into scrapes like this --- he’d find his own trouble, of the ‘incensed husbands and fathers’ variety, but would cross paths with far fewer monsters. If Geralt didn’t care at all, he’d have abandoned the fool in some insignificant village long ago and never thought twice on the subject.

If he didn’t care, he wouldn’t have fished Jaskier out of the damn lake.

Fine. That’s... not true. He would have done it anyway. The terror he felt when he heard the ice crack --- that heart-plunging, vein-chilling terror --- he could have gladly gone without. Instead, he was almost frozen by it. From the ominous creak of the ice beneath their feet, to the sudden sharp scent of unfrozen water, to Jaskier’s half-hesitant “Geralt ---”

Before the ice gave way.

It took him too long to move. Too long to spring into action, too long to force his body to cooperate with his racing nerves. Witchers are trained to never be caught unaware, to react on instinct --- a slow witcher is a dead witcher --- but he wasn’t fast enough to catch Jaskier before he plunged through the ice.

Where he vanished, only a hole remained --- and the water underneath, black and churning, small chunks of ice bobbing like forgotten fragments amidst the inky depths. Nothing thrashed; nothing moved. Geralt plunged both arms in, ignorant of the cold. His lone thought was catching something --- an arm, a foot, the collar of a jacket, anything to prove that Jaskier was down there. Yet as he groped through the murk, he found nothing.

“Jaskier!” he bellowed, the sound echoing across the frozen lake. If the bard could hear him underwater, he gave no indication. Beneath Geralt’s knees, the ice creaked alarmingly, but Geralt fought through the natural instinct to retreat. Not without the damned bard. Dead or alive, he wouldn’t leave Jaskier beneath the surface.

He began to scramble, clearing snow from the frozen laketop to reveal the hardened ice beneath. It was like looking through a mirror into another world. Above was all he knew, all he’d ever known; below lay a foreign realm of darkness and desolation. Some battles even witchers could not fight, and a frozen lake was one of them.

Jaskier was nowhere, nowhere. Nowhere at all. Beneath the ice was a vortex of blackness, no thrashing body in sight. He must have sunk, Geralt’s furious mind realized, sunk right to the bottom, dragged down by that damned lute, and that’s the end of him ----

With a roar of fury, Geralt’s fists slammed down on the ice. “Jaskier!”

For a beat, nothing happened. And then the ice broke.

This time, Geralt’s reflexes served him well. He scrambled back, finding his feet half a second before the frozen ground he’d been kneeling on shattered. Back, and back, the ice splintered and broke, widening the crevasse of churning water. No longer was it safe to stand on; the ice would not tolerate any more weight. Geralt took a step back, gaze fixed on ice’s open mouth, gaping and hungry…

There, a movement.

There, something white and fluttering, like a bird in its death throes.

There, a fucking hand.

He moved too quickly for even the ice to catch him --- but Geralt caught Jaskier, and that was the important thing. In one swift movement, he hauled the thrashing man up, out of the water and onto solid ground. Not solid for long, though. Even at the weight of Jaskier’s body flopping onto its surface, the ice groaned and gave way some more. A hand still locked around Jaskier’s forearm, Geralt seized hold of his companion’s other. There wasn’t a second to waste, even to make sure he was alright. Heaving Jaskier’s pliant body up and over his shoulder, Geralt ran.

Ice breaks fast. Witchers run faster.

He would have tried to save Jaskier anyways, Geralt thinks as he sets the bard’s limp body down on solid ground, but it would be so much easier not to care. At the moment, he cannot stop caring. The crack of ice still rings in his head, dogging him like one of Jaskier’s songs; though he takes little notice of the water’s lingering chill, it’s obvious in the stark whiteness of Jaskier’s face. Somewhere in their mad flight, Jaskier vomited up any water he swallowed. Now, he simply shivers in his damp clothes, still gasping like a fish on land. Something in the icy air doesn’t agree with him, because he keeps coughing, and he’s trembling —

Geralt does care. That’s the difficult thing. Because caring for humans is a fragile process, a risk with limited possibility for reward. Humans are so breakable, and there are so many things that can go wrong.

Caught in a moment like this, he isn’t sure how to care for Jaskier.

“You’re fine,” is what he settles on, drawing back to survey Jaskier’s shaking form. “Damned ice.”

It wasn’t Jaskier’s fault, of course. For once, he wasn’t blindly catapulting himself into mortal peril. Even Geralt hadn’t realized the ice was so thin… which is the real bitch of it, because Geralt should have known. He’s the one with heightened senses, with the ability to smell damned ice in the air — Jaskier couldn’t have known, but he should have. He should.

“You’re alright,” he says again, awkwardly patting Jaskier’s shoulder. Even under his touch, the bard quivers… but he’s still in wet clothes, and the afternoon is frigid. Right now, they need to get him warm.

Surely that will bring the blood back to his cheeks, and chase away that expression — a wide-eyed, blank look, so utterly unlike Jaskier that it’s unnerving. His open mouth still gulps in greedy lungfuls of air, which he proceeds to choke on. Any chance of regaining his composure is clearly beyond Jaskier right now, so it’s up to Geralt to drag him back.

Literally, as it turns out. When, after a few minutes, Jaskier tries to find his feet, his knees immediately give out on him. He winds up crouched on the frozen ground, hands digging into the dirt, practically curled in on himself. His head ticks against his chest as he trembles, eyes squeezing shut. Geralt waits a moment, weighs the cost of Jaskier’s dignity against his own, and finally offers a hand.

Jaskier doesn’t take it. He doesn’t even look up.

“Damn it all,” Geralt grunts. This was exactly what he didn’t want to do — yet it seems there’s no choice. Either he leaves Jaskier to freeze in the middle of a frozen wood, or lead him along like a child. Since Jaskier isn’t in any condition to give his preference —

Tucking one strong arm around Jaskier’s shoulders, Geralt hauls the bard to his feet. For one frightful second, his legs seem ready to give out beneath him again; but Jaskier slumps into Geralt, trusting his weight, and manages to stay upright. Geralt takes one step forward. Jaskier manages to follow. Another step, and another, and soon they are walking. It’s not much — Geralt is basically Jaskier’s walking stick, used to ground him despite his violent shivering — and Jaskier still hasn’t found his voice, but it’s enough. It gets them where they need to go.

When Great grunts and nods to the horse, it’s enough of a shock to resurrect Jaskier’s voice. “You —“ he croaks, then clears his throat with a wince. “You w-want me — t-to ride —“

“Get on the horse,” is all Geralt says, turning away. Chances are, he’ll regret it. Chances are, Roach will resent him for it. But with Jaskier riding, they’ll make it to town within the hour. Given the choice between an inn’s roaring hearth or defrosting over a sickly campfire, he can guess which one Jaskier would prefer.

By some small shred of common sense, the bard doesn’t hesitate. After a few pained grunts — which Geralt does not turn around to investigate, because it’s not his damn job — Roach lets out a huff of her own, and Geralt starts walking. The steady rhythm of hooves behind him reassures that Jaskier manages to make it up.

His estimate isn’t far off, either. They make it to town within the hour, riding past rows of dreary brick-and-mortar buildings towards the heart of town. Usually, Geralt is welcomed with stony silence by suspicious village folk; today is no different. Having Jaskier as a companion does come with rare advantages; he burns so brightly and appears so guileless that people can’t glare at him the way they do at Geralt. When Jaskier rides into town at his side, they are often given far warmer reception. Jaskier charms cart-vendors, smiles at children, winks at passing ladies (and gentlemen)... he makes himself welcome wherever he goes. Geralt May be a far more imposing presence, but he finds himself swept up in Jaskier’s tide, carried with him where he goes.

At the moment, however, Jaskier is in no state to charm and cajole his way into a dreary town’s good graces. He simply hangs low on Roach’s back, head bowed, as they ride through the streets. His shoulders still quake with the occasional shiver; his breaths are a bit too heavy for Geralt’s liking, and he’s too quiet. Somehow, Geralt finds himself more preoccupied with Jaskier’s state than the hostility radiating from the wary villagers.

The local inn has a spare room for the night, a warm bed, and a bath. It’s good enough for Geralt. He slides their coin across the table, steps back outside to collect Jaskier off of Roach — he’d trembled too hard at the notion of coming inside — and makes short work of hustling him up the stairs. As soon as the door closes behind them, Geralt guides Jaskier to the bed, form hands pushing both shoulders down. Jaskier doesn’t even bother with a token protest.

“Your clothes,” Geralt says. When Jaskier stares at him blankly, he curses. “They’re still wet.” Frozen, in fact, hardened with a thin sheen of frost against the night air. Leaving them like that is guaranteed to lead to problems later on; Geralt has no desire to leave town tomorrow with a pneumatic bard trailing behind. He reaches out, giving the sleeve of Jaskier’s jacket a tug. The leather is stiff, sending a hail of ice crystals raining down onto the mattress, Jaskier doesn’t react at all.

So, that’s how it’s going to be?

If Jaskier won’t do his own damn job, Geralt will do it for him. Scowling, he manhandles Jaskier’s jacket and jerkin off. In moments, he is left in nothing but his undershirt. That’s soaked through too, but the fabric isn’t as frozen; Jaskier could easily shrug out of it on his own. Still, he makes no movement to.

“What’s the matter with you?” Geralt demands.

Jaskier says nothing at all. His gaze shifts away from Geralt, across the room towards the closed window. Something about him — be it his hunched posture, eerie silence, or the far-off look on his face — feels as though he isn’t here at all. Jaskier has wandered off without Geralt noticing, going somewhere far away. Wherever he’s gone, Geralt doesn’t know how to get him back.

After a long moment, he sighs, casting the half-frozen clothes aside. When he strides across the room, his footsteps resound against the wooden floorboards. It’s easier to fill the silence with something instead of nothing at all. Somehow, it leaves him feeling less alone. The inn’s portress has filled a metal tub with steaming water, leaving it right outside their door; Geralt makes quick work of dragging it in, grunting as he goes. By the time it’s set up, the floor is littered with puddles, and his pants are uncomfortably soaked — but the memory of Jaskier emerging, white as death, from the black depths stifles any complaint instantly.

Looking back up at the bard, he’s shocked to see Jaskier showing signs of life. He’s found his feet again, and even removed his undershirt. Now, his hands fumble at the laces of his breeches, but they’re shaking too hard to manage.

Geralt allows himself exactly half a minute to settle on absolutely not, before caving in. It’s either this or watch the bard bathe half-dressed, which would be even more pathetic. That’s what he tells himself, at least, as he roughly shoved Jaskier’s hands aside and undoes the laces himself.

“You — you don’t h-have—“ Jaskier’s murmured protest cuts off. The job’s already done. Geralt looks back up at him, unconsciously seizing one of his wrists; automatically, a hiss escapes past his clenched teeth.

“You’re still freezing!” Geralt has met ice wights with more heat in their bones. No wonder he’s trembling so badly — shock mixed with potential hypothermia is a dangerous combination. Either one on its own can be debilitating, but both of them bad enough could be lethal.

“Bath. Now,” he orders brusquely, giving the bard a shove towards the steaming tub. Still dazed, as though caught in a waking dream, Jaskier stumbles into it. He doesn’t even whimper as the hot water envelops his freezing limbs, though it has to hurt. His thousand-mile stare shifts away from Geralt and down to the water. After a moment, Jaskier goes utterly still.

“You need to soak. That won’t stay warm all night.” When Jaskier gives no indication that he’s even heard, Geralt grunts in frustration and kneels at the side of the tub. “Hey!” He gives Jaskier’s shoulder a jolt, and he jerks to attention abruptly. The blatant fear in his eyes takes Geralt aback. He expected exhaustion, even irritation, but not — whatever this is.

“The water closed over my head,” Jaskier exhales, and evening his voice sounds a thousand leagues away. “It happened so fast… like I was swallowed. And I couldn’t — I couldn’t breathe, Geralt, I couldn’t — couldn’t swim. It was so cold —“

“Jaskier.” His hand is still gripping a bony shoulder; now, Geralt’s hold tightens, pulling his companion towards him. When Jaskier tries to pull back, he won’t let him. “Look at me. Hey.” Jaskier is still trembling, but Geralt grounds him with the contact, forcing him to meet his eyes. “You,” he says slowly, “are safe. This water is warm. It’s not going to hurt you. Nothing’s going to hurt you as long as I’m here.”

“It almost—“ Jaskier starts, then cuts off. Geralt understands anyway. It feels like a blade to the gut.

“I know,” he says after a long moment. “I’m… sorry.”

“Sorry?” Jaskier blinks at him, as though slowly awakening from a deep sleep. “Geralt… you saved me.”

But he wasn’t fast enough. “Still.”

Slowly, Jaskier shakes his head. His legs relax in the water, fully submerging, and he sinks up to his chest. Finally, finally, he’s no longer trembling. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

It’s not what Geralt deserves, but this day has given Jaskier nothing he deserves either — not a near-death in a frozen lake, not the clumsy care of a brute who has no idea what he’s doing. This bath is the first nice thing to happen to him all day… and suddenly, Geralt is determined that Jaskier shall enjoy it.

Reaching in, he cups a palm full of water, and releases it over one pale, bare shoulder. Unwillingly, Jaskier lets out a gasp. Steam rises and quickly evaporated off of the chilled skin, but the mere touch of water is enough to make Jaskier want more. He quickly sinks down, submerging himself up to his chin. Geralt watches carefully, intently, just in case.

He will not be too slow to save Jaskier this time.

After a long moment, the bard shifts in the water and says, in a small voice, “Thank you.”

Geralt has no idea what he’s being thanked for; he simply huffs and turns his head, looking away.

#the witcher #jaskier #whump #Anonymous

148 notes · View notes

brandstifter-sys · 4 years

Text

Projections

Word Count: 2530

Characters: Patton, Deceit, Remus, Virgil

Rating: M (not smut)

Warnings: Suicide Attempt, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Sutures, Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Patton is fed up with himself because of how strangers online see him. It takes three unlikely sides to save him and help him work through things.

The following is not an attempt to critique the fandom in any way. This is a vent fic and I was working through my own shit via Patton. I hesitated to post this for a long time out of fear that it would blow up in my face.

Patton stood in the bathroom under the artificial light. The only part of his room that was free from clutter and the one place he could see himself as he truly was, the bathroom was the only place he could go where the memories couldn't reach him—except the ones at the top of his head.

Manipulative…

Strict…

Overbearing…

Abusive…

Tears streamed down his flushed cheeks as he thought about the recent surge of hate. He stared at the flushed yet pallid face in the mirror and shuddered as bile crept up his throat. He couldn't bring himself to fight the voices in his head, screaming at him.

Did he split Creativity all those years ago? Was it his fault that Roman was insecure and that Remus was unhinged? He couldn't tell, they were all just toddlers. Even so, he knew he was to blame for the divide in the mindscape. No matter how hard he tried to lessen the impact, tried to see value in the gothic sides, tried to make amends slowly but surely, no matter what he was still to blame.

Strict…

Overbearing...

He had been strict recently, he found that out the fun way. But at least it was Logan who said it, not the other side who knew early on. He wanted Thomas to be a good person and a good friend. He wanted to be there to guide Thomas, but he was so confused! Right and wrong shifted and he lost his footing. He should have said something, but no he buckled down and tried to force the morals he knew back into place. He hurt everyone with that decision, especially Thomas. He failed at his job.

Manipulative…

He leaned over the sink, tightening his grip around the handle. Maybe this next step was just a new way to weasel some pity out of the others, a threat for attention. He overstepped his bounds in terms of influence and with his family. How did Roman forgive him for the guilt trips? Why would he? Because of morals. He manipulated everyone by existing.

Abusive…

Was he abusive? The theories and stories he read painted him as a monster. Was his own perception skewed so badly that he pretended to be a good guy while being the real villain?

"Patton, you messed up everything!" he growled at his reflection, "You fucked up so bad! It's time for Thomas to have a new, better morality!" He dried his eyes and pressed the blade to his wrist, pressing until red oozed from the wound. The joyful catharsis that filled him only grew stronger as he opened his arm. It was time.

"Patton!" two familiar voices yelped. In an instant he was being held to one side's chest while the other took his box cutter. He squirmed in the tight grasp and fought with all his might.

"Remus hold him still!" Deceit ordered as he conjured a suture kit.

"This is going to hurt. Bear with me." Deceit said flatly to Patton as he tied a tourniquet around his upper arm to stop the bleeding. Patton's eyes widened and he squirmed in Remus' grasp. They were not going to take this away from him! It was the only service he could provide for the mindscape and he would see it through!

"Hey!" Remus hissed when he was kicked in the shin. He shared a look with Deceit as if asking a question. Deceit nodded as he cleaned away the blood.

"Hey Pattycake you should skip the Crofter's in your next batch of cupcakes—ocular fluid would do a better job."

"There won't be a next batch!" Patton wailed, "Let go!"

"No? I was gonna offer you my eyes too!" Remus giggled. Deceit internally groaned at the duke's attempts and lifted a free hand while he threaded the needle.

"Why the hell are you—?" Virgil grumbled low and peeked inside the bathroom door.

"PATTON!?" he shrieked upon seeing the fatherly side with blood oozing from his arm, clearly miserable—and not because Deceit was holding his arm still or because Remus had him pinned to his chest.

"Virgil, thank you for your prompt arrival." Deceit hissed, "Be a dear and paralyze Morality with fear, he has to stop moving." Virgil swallowed thickly, and nodded. He was scared enough that only the slightest touch could freeze Patton in his tracks.

He slunk in next to Deceit and pressed his trembling hand to Patton's throat, letting it become enveloped in black smoke. For a second, Patton hoped Virgil would choke him to death to finish the job. He was wrong. His muscles tightened and his breathing became shallow.

"Oh dear," Deceit tsked, "I have to use quite a bit of grafting material. This could take some time. It will be as pleasant as Remus' fingers."

Remus shoved a surprisingly clean hand in his mouth and growled, "Bite." Patton did, and it was unpleasant.

"It's gonna be okay, Patt." Virgil breathed with tears welling in his eyes. Patton doubted that as the needle went through his vein. He screamed and bit down hard on Remus' hand. Virgil cringed at the muffled sound. Deceit blocked it out and continued his work, using all six hands to make sure everything was perfect.

"Did you do this to yourself, Patt?" Virgil asked, lip trembling. Patton's eyes watered and he averted his gaze. The sorrow and confusion were agony. He didn't deserve pity.

"Yeah, with the sharp knife on the ground." Remus answered for him as he screamed.

"Why?"

"He believes he is only causing harm." Deceit grunted and carefully moved as swiftly as possible, "Unfortunately that is a lie and I was summoned."

"And I showed up because he was having some fun ideas. And then I realized that they weren't just passing fancy and I got scared." Remus frowned.

"So why didn't I get summoned when you were scared?"

"I'm always scared! Have you heard the shit that comes out of my mouth?" Remus giggled awkwardly as a muffled "language" escaped Patton between screams.

"Is there a way to numb him or knock him out?" Remus grunted when Patton's teeth broke through his skin.

"I can," Virgil said, "But we need to lay him down."

"Do it." Deceit ordered "And keep him down. Remus we're going to the lab, don't think about holding him like a baby when he's out cold." Patton shrieked and argued, his vision blurred with tears. Virgil moved his hand to the back of his neck...

And everything went black.

Patton blinked and glanced around the room. He was in the common area, but not his usual commons. The walls were too dark and the air was too cold. He could smell something tomatoey and delicious cooking in the next room, but his stomach was not interested.

He tried to sit up, but he yelped and fell back against the couch. He lifted his arm and stared at the dark stitches running along the underside—that nightmare was real. He was so close! He couldn't even die right!

"Morality!" Deceit gasped and hurried into the room. He was surprisingly without his hat and gloves. In fact he was dressed in black sweats and a yellow hoodie, not at all his usual attire.

"Deceit?" Patton groaned as he tried to sit up again, his head spinning. Deceit hurried over and gently pushed him back.

"No, stay right where you are. You lost a lot of blood and you need to rest." he said and sat on the edge of the seat, studying his face.

"Why?" Patton breathed as two more sides entered the room without saying a word.

"Why did we save you?" Remus asked and shrugged, "Because we need you, Daddy—oh! Daddio!" He rubbed his shoulder where Virgil punched him and pouted.

"But Thomas could make a new, better Morality. A Morality who wasn't the scum of the Earth."

"Pat, what are you talking about?" Virgil questioned and sat next to him on the ground.

"I'm bad. I caused a huge rift in the mindscape, I manipulate the people around me, I'm abusive and strict, and I—"

"Abusive?" Remus questioned, "Since when?"

"Since I caused you and Roman to split. Since I valued one twin over the other."

"You did nothing of the sort. You couldn't have, if you could, Anxiety would be Fear and Vigilance, separately. I would be Self-Care and Deception, in the same way." Deceit scoffed, "Sides split themselves based on Thomas' development."

"I'm the demonstration. Roman is the inspiration. He might not remember what the King planned but I do." Remus explained with a regal air the Patton never expected from him.

"Too bad he was a kid with no foresight with no way of knowing that we'd be so different. He had no idea I would be plagued with intrusive thoughts, violent urges, and a nearly manic state of being that could cause the entire mindscape to implode, splattering side guts against collapsing walls." Remus continued, losing that dignified aura. Patton winced at the implications.

"Hey, Douche, zip it. Literally." Virgil hissed and shifted to his knees to run his fingers through Patton's hair, just enough to ease his tension.

"Patton, you aren't the only one who caused the rift. That was all Thomas as he was growing and learning. You're as much a product of that time as we are." Deceit sighed.

"Besides you weren't the only one forcing the divide, Deceit and I are just as guilty." Virgil added.

"What gave you the idea it was all your fault? Who told you that you were abusive and manipulative?" Remus asked. Virgil shot him a look and Remus zippered his mouth shut, with a cartoonish zipper.

"Well, I kept seeing all these theories and stories and—" Patton began.

"They're absolutely right, a character who they're projecting onto without all the information has to be exactly as they invision." Deceit droned sarcastically, cutting him off.

"You can't please everyone, you have to focus on the people who matter most." Virgil said, "And those things that a bunch of strangers say aren't necessarily the truth. Take it from us."

"But those things have to come from somewhere!" Patton sobbed, "And what if they're right?"

"You can choose to believe me if you want," Deceit sighed, "You are not the exaggerated character in most stories—abusive, or stupid, or naive, or without bias. None of us are merely common tropes, despite the way the series is scripted. Sometimes people need a character to use as a stand-in." He averted his gaze an inhaled slowly.

"Deceit?" Patton whimpered. And that's when Remus unzipped his mouth.

"They made him abusive, murderous, conniving, the scum of the earth, a victim of abuse, suicidal, a soft little baby, a skeezy flirt, and the villain only I could come up with, all after appearing one time!" Remus cheered. Deceit and Virgil glared at him but that didn't stop him.

"They like to make me an obsessive, out-of-control, homicidal maniac who wants Roman to suffer—I mean that's not entirely inaccurate, I have my moments with Princey and I can get pretty manic, but they don't know me! Some of them make me a deranged puppy, suffering from horrible thoughts and isolation. And don't get me started on the shit they put Virgil through!"

"No! Not you too Virge!" Patton cried. Virgil zipped Remus' mouth shut again and sighed.

"Pops, you know I'm not a soft little innocent baby. You know how I'm mean and judgemental and I make threats. There's fics and theories about me being abusive too and fics that make me out to be a shy timid softie. Fics that make me the villain to make these two look better. But you don't believe those, or anything about the rest of us that you haven't learned first hand." Virgil replied.

"Yeah, you have a point there," Patton pouted, "but I can't come up with an outsider perspective for myself."

"You rely too much on how others perceive you." Deceit hummed, "In both positive and negative lights. Take it from any of us, falling for the diverse opinions of strangers is harmful."

"Especially when they're so varied." Virgil added.

"mphhhhh hmmm mmmm mmmph!" Remus grumbled enthusiastically. Then paused to banish the zipper.

"We all get shit, but only the finest compost is allowed in." he chuckled, "Think you can sort out the critique to let your garden bloom?"

"That was incredibly well thought out and positive." Patton commented all too soon.

"And then you'll have your choice of poisonous plants to play with and make the people in your way suffer an agonizing death!"

"There it is." Virgil grunted.

"Well at least the first part was uplifting." Patton pouted.

"Indeed. And if you find it hard to sort out the truth from the projections, my door is open." Deceit said, offering a half smile, "I know how hard it is to let them have their catharsis and keep a sense of self."

"For better or worse you have the three of us." Remus smiled, "The sly, the mad, and the stinky!"

"Pops, you have a whole lot more family than you think." Virgil added, and stood up,

"But right now I gotta go, teach Remus how to be you."

"Why Remus?" Patton questioned.

"Deceit is busy." Remus shrugged, "Byeeee!!" Then he and Virgil sank out. Patton was confused but oddly comforted. Deceit was watching him with concern and a certain fondness.

"After all I did to you, why did you come running?" Patton questioned and tried to sit up, "Why not get Roman and Logan?"

"Neither of them are quite equipped to handle that situation, not when Roman would blame himself and doubt his capability as a prince, and certainly not Logan, who's been bottling his feelings for far too long, seeing you like that would break him."

"But what about you and the other two?"

"Fight-or-flight is an instinctual protection, I am self-preservation, and Remus is a far more hands-on creativity, thinking on the fly and worming his way out of danger as quickly as he finds it," Deceit answered, "We shadowlings are here to protect Thomas, all of him, as prevention and damage control. We care about all of him, even if we don't see eye to eye."

"But Princey and Lo care about him."

"Despite his insistence on being a heroic knight, Roman is not a form of protection. Logic can provide some insight, but overall he is a guide, the three of you are."

"You have it all figured out." Patton pouted. Deceit shook his head and returned that pout in earnest.

"I don't." he sighed, "I'm not going to pretend that I do, unlike a certain educator. But I do know one thing for certain."

"What's that?"

"Thomas needs all of us, especially his emotions and morals. He needs you, Patton, no matter what anyone says."

"How do I know you aren't lying?"

"Actions speak louder than words. Who was it who stitched you up and made pasta for you?"

"You made pasta?"

"With your secret ingredient." Deceit chuckled.

"Cumin." Patton said with a knowing grin.

"Yes." Deceit responded, flashing a snakey fang.

#sanders sides #patton sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #virgil sanders #suicide tw #suicide attempt tw #blood tw #gore tw #self-hatred tw #patton angst #angst tw #hurt/comfort #sandyscribed

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witchescauldron · 5 years

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Sagittarius Sun is an adventurous soul, they hate to be tied down by anything be it a job, responsibilities, friends, family and especially lovers. To love a Sagittarius is to never fully embrace them, you have to love their willful, adventurous nature. They have many friends in many different social circles, they like the odd array of people they know with different hobbies and likings, this suits them best. In their younger years as a teenager and young adult they could easily have been known as a party animal, at an age of not much personal freedom, partying and drinking gave them a moment's freedom from family, responsibility, and school. They are wild in their youth, chasing their hearts whims without a second thought. They feel their emotions deeply like any other fire sign but rag is especially present in this fire sign, it starts off as a small flicker and quickly builds into a full on dumpster fire, their rage can be messy and violent, braking things is a common outlet, or driving fast. Once a Sagittarius grows older typically they calm down and can better control their anger. Sagittarius make for great teachers, they give life lessons to others through storytelling, and all the stories are true, because they have lived the life lessons they give out. They make mistakes because they are so eager to jump before looking but they think that is half the fun never knowing where they will land, but they are always taking mental notes and improving upon themselves and a situation. They love to learn new things, this sign must always be stimulated physically and mentally they can't just lay a idle, they must be learning something or doing something. Up for some rock climbing? Then after while you let your body rest why not go for a local tour and learn somethings about the culture and town. Sagittarius is always looking for a new joke, they love to laugh and they love to tease. Teasing is their own love language. Sagittarius are rather optimistic and have a blind faith in many people and situations that's why they're so confident that they can just jump into any situation and everything will work out. They have surprisingly good luck so most of the time things go their way, but when things do go awry they have an exceptionally calm attitude and level head and to easily get out of most situations. They get along with almost everyone, but if you want to attract a Sagittarius or catch their interest offer them some interesting facts, they're very curious and always loved learning any new information you can provide them is greatly appreciated and will definitely peak their interest in you.

Gemini Moon is a very knowledgeable, intuitive, and curious individual. They're most happy when they're learning something be it from a book, documentary, surfing the web at 3 a.m. because they just never fell asleep, poor people. they love learning about all different kinds of things about Mayan civilization, aliens, other worlds, physics, and human behaviour. Gemini Moons have a very calming effect on others, they can be soft-spoken and gentle putting others at ease when they are on edge. Unfortunately, many Gemini moons experience anxiety, and stress getting too many sleepless nights and a few existential crisis. Your mind is always working and never wants to shut off, this wears them down and sends them into spirals. Gemini moons are very witty and charismatic finding it very easy to get along with others and to attract people towards them. They tend to have a different collection of friends they don't stick to one specific group they get along well with a lot of people almost anyone who mentally stimulates them is considered a friend. As I mentioned before Gemini moons have a tendency to overthink, they also have a tendency to talk a lot, and read a fair amount. They're generally well-informed and can go on quite a bit of a few tanjuns but most people around them enjoy these long-winded explanations in philosophical moments hanging onto every word the lunar Gemini has to say. They're not big fans of chores, their tastes always change so their home is in a constant state of in progress. their house can be a bit messy from the neglect of chores, but they call it home they feel comfortable in the disorganization. Lunar Gemini's are we and sociable, fun and easy to pick up a conversation with a complete stranger to pass the time. When irritated or upset this usually friendly whitty do you sign can become snappy, and impatient, using their silver tongue to cut through even the toughest of skin.

Pisces Rising is a kind, perspective, and lost looking individual. And their younger days they often struggled I was feeling like they didn't belong, feeling different, and trying to understand why they felt as if the world was multi-dimensional. The experience spirital things a bit deeper than others, often feeling drawn to the unexplained, and Mystikal. Artistic by nature and a little bit of an oddball they follow the beat of their own drum, it's hard to tie a Pisces Rising down there is fluid as water, and very hard to control. Almost constantly in a rebellious stage they tend to enjoy body art, piercings, darker fashion, and colourful hair. Mini mistake a Pisces for being a soft child, but many with a Pisces in their chart realize that Pisces is more like a spiritually mature teenager. They act on their whims, feeling the greatest satisfaction from fulfilling their own needs. They are kind and caring soul, often to a fault. Having a hard time saying no to giving to a charity, always helping out whenever they can, we're even going out of their way to pick something up for somebody they they enjoy doing Small deeds no matter how small it fills them with a self of accomplishment, and most believe even just subconsciously one good act can make a difference to somebody. Very artistic you need a source for an outlet comedy writing, poetry, singing, painting anyting. Pisces Rising has a lot swirling in their mind and then their hearts that's why a group of supportive friends and family are almost imperative for the sign to make heads or tails of their emotions and thoughts. Many people are just drawn to a Pisces Rising, they're soft and caring nature pull many towards them.

@kiko-kanari

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punkscowardschampions · 4 years

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Bea & Ro

Bea: What time were you planning to go to mass on your birthday? Ro: [a time that is ridiculously early af] Ro: You're going to be there to present me with my rosary right? Bea: I thought it was just before the party, when is that starting? Ro: Traditionally, yes, but I don't want to hurry through it as if it's not important Ro: [a time for when the party is starting] Bea: Right Bea: it's just that it was going to be a struggle to get back for the party as is Bea: That's essentially adding an extra day to my stay Ro: but you're the closest thing to a godparent I have, spiritually Ro: I don't know who else could do it Bea: and I know that you really want to do this Bea: I'm just not sure if I can make this happen, the schedule doesn't have much wriggle room Ro: okay, I suppose you can lead the last doll ceremony at the party instead Ro: I was intending to have Ali give it to me, since she made the outfits and everything but I'm sure she'll understand Bea: I don't mind if Ali does it Bea: it isn't as if this is actually traditional to us Ro: I'm trying to create my own traditions, it means something to me in that sense Bea: I'll try to make the party Bea: Yes, I know Bea: but I can't have my life revolve around it for a full calendar week Ro: I can't help when in the calendar my birthday falls in relation to your university terms Bea: Of course not but this is a lot, Ro Ro: No, it isn't Ro: it's a party that you'll try to attend Bea: I don't know of any other party you have to attend church to go to Bea: unless it's a wedding Ro: I haven't thrown any other parties prior to this Bea: You know what I mean Bea: this doesn't need to be such an event, does it Ro: It's my birthday, it's allowed to be whatever I want it to be Bea: Right Bea: well I don't know if I can come, alright Ro: well, if you want me to tell you that's fine, I won't, because it isn't Bea: What do you want me to do? Bea: The workload is insane Ro: if you are unable to cope with it approximately a month after Christmas break, what would you like me to say or do? Ro: *before Bea: Don't talk like you have any idea about the workload, firstly, that's what you can do Bea: You haven't even done your leavers yet Ro: You only just got back, that's common knowledge Ro: being snowed under is a poor excuse Bea: They set the assignments at the start of term Bea: even if I have all term to do it, would you suggest I leave it to the last minute? Ro: I would suggest you learn more effective time management some time before you graduate Ro: since you asked Bea: Please Bea: You're in a strop but don't be a brat about it Ro: you're well aware of when I was born, it's nobody's fault but your own if you can't handle your own schedule to coincide with long established party plans Bea: I'm aware it's in the middle of term, Ro Bea: and I go to school in another country and am living on student loans Bea: I'm not flying back for every little thing Ro: it's one of the shortest possible plane rides and you're more than happy to take advantage of that when it suits you Ro: or Fraze Bea: That's my business Bea: and I don't come back as much as you're trying to put on Ro: and I don't ask you to come back ever, or for anything Bea: It's clear you're only concerned about yourself Ro: for one day a year, why is that so uncalled for? Bea: Because, all this is just ridiculous Bea: you aren't Latina Ro: look for the ridiculous in anything and you will find it Ro: or if you prefer, all great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning Bea: You do it with Ali, as per Bea: you don't need me for any of this Ro: that's just as well since you can't be relied upon to take part in any of this Bea: If it was important, I'd be there Ro: it is important to me Bea: I can't say you've inspired me to make any greater attempts than I already have Ro: of course not, your mind was already made up when this conversation began Ro: however inspiring I am or am not is irrelevant because of your unwillingness to prioritise me regardless Bea: You seem pretty convinced of a few things yourself Bea: It isn't exactly the easiest time for me, regardless of my time management Ro: it's my 15th birthday that approaches, not my 5th, I'm utterly convinced that waiting at the window for you is an empty pursuit Bea: You're being dramatic Bea: and if you'd like to compare 5th birthdays with me, feel free Ro: and yet I'm the one who's supposedly being dramatic Ro: one great sacrifice and you're content to never consider making another in my honour, however big or small Ro: okay then Bea: I didn't sacrifice anything for you Bea: They died, there's no good behind us Bea: I got help, we got out of there, end of Ro: maybe that's the end of the story as far as you're concerned Ro: it's the beginning of mine Bea: We aren't even talking about that Bea: yet another topic you know nothing about and I'm not willing to endure lectures on Ro: they died on the same day, it's impossible to talk about one without the other Ro: if I were being dramatic, that would be cause enough Bea: What does it matter? Bea: Can you remember it? No Ro: that in itself matters, having nothing to remember them by except you and your memories which you're as unwilling to share with me as you are to make any time to celebrate with me now Bea: I was 4, I don't have any memories either Bea: That's how it is, there is nothing to celebrate there Ro: Fine Ro: I'll leave you to your assignments then Bea: I will send your present Ro: Thank you Bea: Right Bea: if anyone asks, tell them what you like Ro: it's unlikely anyone will given how selfish I'm apparently being and how air tight your reasons for not showing up supposedly are Ro: besides, I have enough to do without indulging in any games of chinese whispers as to your whereabouts Bea: Then you best get on with it Ro: I have my own schedule under control Bea: I've not got the time to have this petty back and forth with you and if you're as busy as you say, that shouldn't be a problem Ro: finally, something you're right about Ro: it isn't a problem Ro: continuing this conversation with you is a waste of my energy Bea: Off you go then Ro: See you at Christmas, assuming you decide that's worth returning for Bea: Either way, you won't be waiting at the window Ro: precisely Ro: and you'll have my present sent if you don't appear yourself, little else mattering at times like these anyway Bea: You aren't upset I'm not coming, you're only upset your plans are compromised Bea: because if you remotely gave a shit about me being there, you would've approached this whole conversation differently Ro: experience has taught me what you value and what you don't Ro: I'm not about to make any kind of impassioned plea in order to be a hastily added footnote Ro: particularly if it follows that I'm to be blamed for your ensuing university hardships should you dare to attend Bea: You know me so well Bea: wait, no, we both agree that is laughable Bea: so spare telling me what I will or won't do or say, my sides are splitting as is Ro: perhaps I will when you respond in kind and stop telling me how I feel or why Bea: Experience isn't something you are solely blessed/cursed with Bea: I can only react to what I'm presented with Ro: you don't want to come, of course you're reacting in line with that, that's what I'm being presented with Bea: Of course I don't, but it's about obligation regardless Ro: you've long been free from any and all obligation towards me Bea: Don't be delusional Ro: you should make time for church if you're going to make yourself such a martyr to my existence Bea: Guess what, we're not Catholic either Ro: There is no we, my faith is my own Bea: Nah Ro: you don't speak for me on any subject, especially my personal beliefs Bea: It's bullshit, Ro Bea: no one chooses to be a Catholic Ro: I have Bea: Yeah, well you would love to be special Ro: I'm so unsurprised that you manage to find enough time to be confrontational Bea: If I were to actually call you out on all your bullshit, we'd be here 'til your 18th Ro: feel free to write the most urgent of your grievances in the card you'll send Bea: You don't deserve a gift that good Ro: that much we can agree on Ro: I don't deserve any of this from you Bea: For god's sake Ro: Stay there, as we said, nobody but me thinks it's unfair that you aren't coming Bea: I'm sure they do Ro: Well, I have not and will not ever care what your boyfriend thinks Bea: As I understand, it's mutual Bea: and he's more than just my boyfriend to you Ro: no, he isn't Bea: How do you think you get to pick and choose? Bea: you can't claim Ali and ignore everyone else, they exist too, like it or not Ro: In much the same way you and he both did, I would imagine Ro: if I were to claim him as my brother, being your boyfriend would be abhorrent and it's obvious what you would both rather by now Bea: Your choice to not integrate and be part of this family has nothing to do with me Ro: Likewise Bea: Fuck you Bea: you had every chance, this is the only one you've ever known Ro: by your own admission you had all the same chances, no sacrifices made for me and no memories of the former Ro: you chose him and he chose you, you're the one being delusional if you think there was room for me and him to still play happy families afterwards Bea: Now you want to believe me, convenient isn't it Ro: and you want to have your cake and eat it, it's an appropriately timed idea, at least Bea: This isn't about me, it's about you being ungrateful Ro: No, it's about you attempting to tell me how to behave as if you reside in an ivory tower instead of a glass house Bea: You're having your teenage rebellion phase, fine Ro: again no, I'd be more than willing to listen to you had you actually said anything worth listening to Bea: Sure Ro: Undeniably so Bea: No, bullshit, again, Ro Bea: you don't listen to anything anyone has to say because you think you're right about everything despite the obvious Ro: you can't garner a receptive audience because you're just talking and talking without pausing for breath or to listen yourself Bea: This might be a big conversation for you, but that's only because you never talk to anyone but yourself either Bea: I'm actually busy, with things far more important than your tantrum Ro: Go and devote yourself fully to those things then, I already told you to do so Bea: You think you tell me what to do? Bea: No Bea: I'm not so single-minded Ro: If I had any desire to waste my breath I'd do so during a piano lesson with one of my more challenging students, when I'm paid to Bea: Yes, that about sums you up Ro: thus allowing you to draw a line under me Ro: and all of this Bea: No Bea: that's your move Bea: if you're going to be as callous as to want it, at least have the follow-through Bea: I'm not making this one easy for you, lest I be accused of martyrdom again Ro: I wouldn't dream of trying to compete with you in the stakes of who is the most callous Bea: I miss a birthday, how much have you skipped out on, Ro? Bea: When are you ever fucking here? Ro: such a convenient scapegoat for you when you no longer wish to be held to your own account Bea: If you want to be a ghost, you don't get to defend yourself Bea: dead people don't get to prove or deny any claims made about them Ro: the dead are far superior conversationalists than you, in my experience Bea: Your imagination, it'd have to be Ro: boundless though it is, no Bea: You don't know any dead people, and that's the truth of it Ro: I've met lots of them Bea: No, you haven't Bea: and how many people turn up to your party is going to reflect that Ro: yes I have, and how many people turn up to my party reflects how many people I chose to invite Ro: for all the things you deign to lecture me on, having a select social circle is perhaps one of the most hypocritical Bea: If there was any element of choice, it'd be you and Ali Bea: it's obligation and the guestlist of your not family reflects that both ways Ro: this repetition is neither effective nor amusing Bea: It's the sad fucking truth and someone needs to smash it through your thick skull Ro: a chore you'll never be too busy for when you take such delight in it Bea: I hate talking to you Bea: do you seriously not understand how much you make my skin crawl Ro: and yet here you still are Ro: how ghoulish Bea: because I am your sister Bea: your actual sister, and it isn't optional Ro: hardly, we both opt out regularly as previously highlighted Bea: No, I don't Ro: you currently are Ro: and you have on many other occasions Bea: Not being able to stomach a whole performance from you trying to be someone else is not opting out Bea: I wouldn't still be here if that were an option Ro: you'd have to know who I was in order to have the slightest indication of whether or not I was attempting to be someone different Bea: I know who you are Bea: but don't insult me by pretending you have the slightest inclination Ro: you insult me with such a barefaced lie Ro: you don't know me at all Bea: You wish Ro: I'm not in the habit of wasting wishes Bea: How's that working out for you? Ro: Perfectly Bea: Then that's really sad Ro: You're a very convincing adult Bea: That's allegedly what you're preparing yourself for Ro: sober disenchanted maturity, so Wuthering Heights asserts among many other turns of phrase Ro: you're more suited to it Bea: You know, drunken, enchanting or youthfulness aren't words anyone would apply to you Bea: so I'd be more careful with what I asserted if I were you, you aren't likely to be thrilled with what you get back Ro: I am content without the constant appraisal of others right now, perhaps when I find my own way to university we can swap places though Ro: if nothing else, it'll grant you a rest Bea: Of course you are Bea: you haven't spent this entire conversation doing just that Bea: at least package your delusions as somewhat believable to anyone else or you just look wholly derranged Ro: this entire conversation is centred around the disruption of my plans and thus my self discipline is the only thing seeking to be placated as you yourself commented Bea: You've sought out every opportunity to assert your appraisals of me, unprompted and unforgiving Bea: I wasn't going to come out of genuine lack of ability, but the poison of spite and bitterness was barely held back between your pursed lips, no need to push hard for all that to spill forth Ro: however you decide to excuse your absence makes no difference to me Bea: It makes no difference because nothing does with you Bea: you'd rather I wasn't there because at least then you have something to lament over Ro: I'd rather you weren't because you've made no secret of the fact you don't want to be, as always Bea: because it's fantasy, none of it is real Bea: what is the point of us going through the motions of pretending to have this life-affirming bonding experience when it'll be nothing close Bea: how easily I could be swapped out for any other bit player confirms that, it isn't true, and this all means fuck all to you Ro: you could be so easily swapped out because necessity has dictated it on more prior occasions than either of us have the time or inclination to call to mind Ro: you kept yourself at a distance long before you left for Cambridge, lecturing me about my lack of integration or whatever you called it doesn't change that Bea: Because it was not me you needed to intergrate with, is the point Ro: romantically aligning yourself with Fraze and babysitting Rocky on occasion doesn't mean you can point out my perceived failings as if you're an expert, moreso Bea: This constant comparison is pointless and not what I'm talking about Bea: you were meant to be a part of this family Bea: YOU, not me Ro: and I am Ro: if only because they're obligated to care for and about me as you're so quick to point out at every single opportunity Bea: if you think that's the only reason, legitimately, for them, then you're proving my point about how out of touch you are Ro: you're the one who keeps propping up this conversation with that as the reasoning Ro: whether or not it has ever crossed my mind hasn't been brought up for discussion Bea: No, it's you failing to do your part, that obligation is a two-way street Bea: you're the one giving it negative connotations Ro: being in someone's debt rarely has positive ones Bea: That's what family is Ro: and contrary to what you believe, I fulfil my responsibilities to this one Bea: If you say so Ro: I do Bea: Then that's all that matters Ro: I'm well aware of what does and doesn't matter Bea: Okay Bea: not me you need to convince Ro: I'm also well aware of where to place my conviction so that it isn't misplaced Bea: Seems like it Ro: Goodbye Bea

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irepookie · 5 years

Text

Infinity

Summary: QUEEN AU where Roger (akaRow) is a teen single dad and aspiring rock star

Warnings: fluff fluff fluff and some cursing.

Words: 2090

I changed the names Cause I feel more comfortable writing it that way (idk why) but I could re-change them if that'd help you getting more into the story.

Rowan Queen: (tho you can imagine Ben as well. This is my take)

Chapter 1: I'm here

Written from his mother's POV, which gives us some insight on the family background and history as the first day of the rest of their lives unravels.

Gina Marie Queen (neé Thomas) had always been ahead of her time. She was never a fearful woman. Not for men anyway. She hadn't had a father -that alcoholic piece of shit was nothing close to that.-

And for all she knew, she hadn't had a husband either -another waste of space-. She had finally kicked him out hers and her son's life after 10 years of hell when that drunk asshole's rehearsal fits had made her lose the daughter she had been longing for since she could remember.

He could throw plates at her, and she'd fight back burning his beloved match tapes. Or intoxicate his food. Those were her favorite paybacks.

He could verbally abuse their son, and wake up with pink hair the next day. (Rowan's idea when he was 10)

But the night he had pushed her and she had broken waters at month number 5, that was it.

It should have ended earlier, she knew. Her unborn daughter shouldn't have had to suffer the consequences for Gina to finally throw his shit out the window and soak them in the Jack Daniels bottle he hid under his side of the bed and light them with the lighter he'd switch his bloody cigars.

But unfortunately that's what it had taken.

And she would have strangled him in his sleep if she had known Rowan would be taken care of while in jail. But she wasn't. And someone had to think of the rebellious trouble maker too.

And when her son -yes, she decided that rebellious trouble maker was, more or less, worthy of the title despite being the spitting image of the his father- became a father, Gina feared her granddaughter would have the same fate. Row had it in his genes and , as much she had tried to raise him as best as she was capable of, that fear never faded.

So when the phone rang

"Rowan Queen?"

""I'm his mother"

"I'm from the Hospital's maternity aisle. We call to inform you that his daughter's mom has disappeared after giving birth..."

That was all she needed to hear before dropping the phone and leaving it hanging upside down

"ROWAN EUGENE QUEEN! GET YOUR FUCKING ASS HERE THIS INSTANT!"

"I've got rehearsals with the band..."

"YOU GOT SOMEONE PREGNANT, YOU IDIOT??!"

"Me? No!"

"WELL THINK AGAIN!"

"Mum..."

"Just got a call from hospital saying your daughter's mother has disappeared after birth!!! And they called us!"

He was high school's infamous Playboy. Blonde, Blue Big eyes, and a charming smile. And on top of that, one of the four members of a wannabe rock band. The Hot Drummer, they call him .Gina knew. She didn't need to hear about his reputation to know the likelihood of him getting someone pregnant was high. But she had pictured it differently.

She grabbed him by the wrist and pulled, but he didn't move. He kept staring at nowhere.

"Rowan!!!"

No reaction.

She had to slap his cheek in order to get him out his shock

"What do you want?!"

"We're going to hospital, right now"

"What? Why?"

"To work this shit out!!"

"But we have to rehearse"

"Fuck that shit Rowan! They've just told us you got someone pregnant and she run off! That's the most important thing right now so get in that this instance!!"

He did as told. It was a tense car ride. And Gina remembered Elsa. Her baby girl. And how for her father's fault she wasn't there.

"So what now?" Row asked

"We're putting her up for adoption, unless they can contact the mother, although I don't think she should have a say. But if you're the so called father and your name is in the file, we can leave your part signed and then go home."

"Oh"

Gina thought she caught a hint of disappointment in his voice.

It had to be her imagination. Disappointment over what? Missing the wonderful experience of being a teen dad? Ha.

He did look thoughtful. He hadn't even turned on the radio.

Something was off.

But she figured he'd just want to get this whole thing over with, and that he'd sign her over to a better family. As anyone with minimum common sense would

Right?

Then, as they waited for the application, he asked if he could see her.

Her answer was immediate "No"

"Why?"

"How come Why? Why on Earth would you want to see her?"

"Well I'm here. You've been freaking out , and freaking me out as well. Might as well see who this fuss is about"

"A baby. That's it. You don't need to see one. They all look the same. Small, Wrinkly, like a large prune. There you have it"

"Well I wanna see my... That small wrinkled prune"

Damn. He had said <<mine>>. He already considered her his.

Gina changed her strategy.

"Your name is on the certificate, right. But that means nothing"

"Why would it be there otherwise?""

"A mistake. Or maybe the mother just wants to tangle you up."

"The mother's gone"

"Yes. For now. It's called Baby Blues, and when it's gone She'll have you exactly where she wants to. Because I'm guessing she won't be no straight A student either, and you'll have to sustain them both -if you ever make it to college- and you'll end up getting married, and maybe you don't even love her, but divorce is even more tedious than getting married. That's why I've Never done it. So you'll both be stuck as cashiers in whatever low cost store, and then she'll confess that you were her high school crush but that the kid is actually her ex boyfriend's and then you'll throw a fit, and you'll get in a fight and you'll end up grabbing whatever is on your reach to hit whoever's on your reach...."

"Wait mom. I just... I just wanna see her." Row cut her off " Whoever the fuck she may actually be, I'm the one who's here. And I ain't signing anything without knowing who I'm making decisions for. That's all. I just want to see. I don't even want to touch her or whatever. Just knowing who's the reason I had to turn the boys down today. Then I'll sign the paper and we'll go home."

"She's in the NICU anyway. Doubt they'll let you in"

"What's NICU?" Gina caught genuine concern in his voice.

"Nothing bad." She reassured.

They handed the files, and she took them "I'll fill them"

She got through the first page, and he was gone.

Shit. That stubborn bastard.

She didn't want him to be a father. He was 19 for fucks shake. Had never had one of his own. He had only moved out a couple months ago. Nothing lasted much for him. Wether it was a girlfriend, a job, clothes... His longest pet had reached one year alive. And he couldn't go long without getting injured

Not even his drum kit had survived the move, and was litterally patched up. She'd consider herself guilty of murder if she allowed a baby to be on that list. Not to mention the alternative was that she'd be the one, sooner or later, to take over. Because he was never patient and would stress too much -if he didn't lose interest first- or get fed up and cause her shaken Baby syndrome. And just as she was too young to be a grandmother, she was too old to raise a second kid.

So she stormed inside the NICU aisle ready to get him out of there. And what she saw was quite breathtaking. The look in his eyes was priceless: such fondness and marvel... Only comparable to when he had first seen that red Ludwig drum set through the glass of the local music store.

"I've never seen something so awesome in my life!" He had said.

They had never been able to afford it. He had tried to get a job after school, to save up everything. But it hadn't been enough. And he'd go everyday to that street, and just stare at the shiny wonderful kit for hours, hands on the glass, knowing that the likelihood of ever owning it was almost non existent.

He ended up making acquaintance with the owner. They tried to bargain for it, but his lowest price was way too high for them. He did get to play it once tho, and it was an undescribable experience. Murray, the owner, let him give it a try out of pity when someone else bought it, as a farewell. And had never seen anything like it again.

Now this baby was, technically, his -regardless of what biology could say- and he was about to give it away.

Gina did know on first hand it was, having been a volunteer on midwife assistance with her aunt. And 10/10 woman who swore to never want anything to do with their child changed their minds as soon as they laid eyes on them. Only those who really followed through -take it away, I don't wanna see it- walked out there with empty arms.

Now Row was looking at that baby ad if she was a treasure, but that meant nothing in the long term. His father had done something similar to Elsa's sonogram.

Her poor little girl. So young.

So helpless. She had been so naive thinking he would ever change.

But she wasn't gonna make that mistake again. She loved her son, but he really wasn't good at anger management.

She couldn't expose another innocent child to such danger.

"Rowan, come here now. You've seen her. Got what you wanted. Met her. Now let's get this over with"

His hand was resting on the top of the incubators glass, even if he had unglued his eyes from the tiny being inside and nailed on her now, as if he had been staring at the sun for a long while and was now blinded.

"Why the hurry?"

Was she hearing correctly?

"How come Why the hurry? Because we both have things to do"

"I've already cancelled the one plan I had..."

"Well I still have an errand to get done."

He didn't reply, eyes back on the child

"Rowan" she approached him, making sure not to look at the kid. "Rowan Eugene Queen, look at me when I'm talking to you" she ordered in a strict tone

"What?"

"Papers. Signature. Now"

"I'm thinking about it"

"Thinking about...?! Thinking about what? What's there to think? Sign these and we'll go home, and we'll never have to look back at this! Nobody has to know."

"And what about the raisin?"

"The what?"

"Her. What about her?"

"She'll be fine. Adopting couples love newborns. She'll go to a fit, nice marriage and will be very happy. And we'll resume our lives"

"And I'll never see her again?"

"Why do you care?"

He just shrugged and turned his attention back to her. Gina watched him watch her. Goddamn. She was losing him.

"Are you the father?" A nurse asked, walking towards.

*Don't say it. Don't say it. Don't say it*

Gina prayed.

"I suppose I am" He said it so naturally, with such a bright genuine smile that Gina almost forgot how critical those words were.

"Well, I'm Callie, and I'm on charge tonight. Congratulations, Mr... Oh, Queen." Her eyes widened When reading the tag on the incubator. "We're glad at least someone's here"

"Yea, well..." He scratched the back of his head nervously

"Don't worry. Her mom will get over it." She turned to Gina "You must be Gran..."

"No I'm not" Gina snapped harshly before she could finish the sentence "We were leaving"

"We were not"

"Rowan, I will not repeat it. Sign those bloody papers and get your ass back in the car"

"What if I don't want to?"

"This is serious! There's no other way!"

"Yes there is!"

"You can't be serious!" What 19 year old would ever choose this?

"Well I am"

"You don't even know what serious means! You have no sense of responsibility! You've never finished anything you've ever started!"

"Maybe I want to change! Maybe I can grow up if you stop pestering the shit outta me day In day out! This is not your decision!"

"I'm not letting you do this Row!"

"Then go! Leave me the fuck alone and stop getting in my way!"

Before Gina could answer, a small cry came from the incubator.

And she found herself walking backwards.

It was right she couldn't stop him but she wasn't gonna take part on it.

So she turned around and left, as the nurse explained Row how to hold his newborn daughter.

"You're not gonna break her, I promise. You'll do fine. Because you're here. Just because you're here I know you're gonna be a great dad. You already are" Callie said, putting his trembling arms on the correct position before lifting the small white bundle out the incubator.

They usually didn't do it unless it was necessary for a feed or a change, but she thought this was even more important: they had to meet each other properly: The little one needed to hold on to someone after being abandoned. And there was something in the young boy's eyes that told her he needed just the same.

So with a reassuring smile Callie placed her on Rowan's arms, who brought her closer to his chest by instinct, a small smile already on his lips as he took in her features.

She was gorgeous. And he didn't know why, but he found her to be the most perfect thing he had ever seen. He instantly knew he was gonna protect that wrinkled prune at all costs.

"Hey there, lil'raisin. I'm..." He swallowed the lump in his throat "I'm your Dad and... I'm here now."

🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶

Hope you guys liked it

It's my first fic on Tumblr so I still don't have the formatting completely handled and my phone won't let me select all the paragraphs at once to put it all in regular font.

Let me know what you think. Thank you all!!😍😍😍😍

~Pookie

#bohemian rhapsody #queen band #roger taylor #roger taylor baby #roger taylor daughter #single dad! roger taylor #ben hardy! roger taylor #fluff #queen fic #queen family #queen #queen fanfiction #queen fandom #queen fluff #fathers and daughters #Rowan Queen #Infinity fic #music #infinity fic

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arethereanyoriginalusernames · 5 years

Text

CHARACTER SPOTLIGHT

ADDISON WOODS, P 1

Requested by @zoophobiapika

For anyone who does not know what this is, Character Spotlight 1 is where I criticized how a specified character is written. Part 2 is where I analyze the character and make predictions. Also, I'm doing these in a slightly different format, so if you see me redo my Damian character spotlight, don't be surprised (plus I'm not proud of that one). I am also specifically criticizing how the character is written. I'm no expert when it comes to art, so if you'd like a critique on his design, I'd recommend bugging @rzphhs.

Zoophobia belongs to our fandom's Lord and savior, Vivziepop. This, however, is not a critique of her CURRENT writing skills. Not sure if you noticed, but zoophobia is kinda old. The reason I'm doing this is because I believe that when we analyze stories we love and find flaws within them, we can find ways to improve our own writing. I do not hate Vivziepop, and this is not meant as an attack. Also, you're free to disagree with me. I'm not some godly figure who's always correct. However, I ask that any comments remain civil. If any arguments or whatever break out over this, Imma Chase some bitches with a pool noodle. We good? Let's go.

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" BREAKING NEWS. LOCAL CANADIAN HAS DECIDED TO ONCE AGAIN TALK BAD ABOUT AN INCREDIBLY CUTE CHARACTER! IF YOU HAVE SEEN THIS INDIVIDUAL REPORT THEM TO THE DEPARTMENT OF WHOGIVESAFUCK AND TURN THEM IN IMMEDIATELY. THIS PERSON WAS LAST SEEN ROBBING A STARBUCKS, WHICH YOU'D THINK WOULD BE A BIGGER CRIME, BUT HEY, WE ALL KNOW WHAT TAKES PRIORITY! "

Oh what a lovely day. I haven't slept all night, and I have ammonia or something. Lovely. What a perfect time to talk about a fictional character. Look, if it's any comfort to the fan girls who come across this, part 2 will have me being more of a fan than a critic. Just bare with me for this, and if worse comes to worse, blame Pika.

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As per usual, let's get started with some criticism I don't agree with.

Addison looks like a girl

Alright, first of all, don't read my stories. Second, maybe this is because I live in Canada where the need for equality is pounded into your head every other hour, but...yeah? Dudes can look girly. Have you never seen a girly guy before? If so, how? Now, I'm aware that some people have an issue with this because Addi is gay, and girly gays are a common trope when gays are presented in media. While yes, this is true, Addi being a sort of trope isn't necessarily a bad thing. A trope-y character can still be written well and be entertaining. Besides, it's been said that all original ideas have been done before, so good luck trying to ever find a 100% original character anywhere.

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That's about all, but before I tear this character limb from limb, I'd like to go over things I DO like about this character.

He was ok in chapter 3

Yeah, he had problems there too, like when he just stood around and had little to no reaction to his bff turning into a mini cuthulu, but those are not problems exclusive to Addi. He didn't stand out much, per say, but what we got wasn't terrible. His banter with others was fine and even funny at some points.

He has a character motivation

Yeah, his goal to find love is a boring one, but unlike some of our other important characters, he actually has one.

He might be more interesting in the future

Addison is basically an artificial life form created by Xirxene, and not only is Xirxen after him, if Vivz still goes with this concept in the reboot, he apparently has mad sword skills yo, a dark side called Adder, and can summon two giant ass snakes. If that concept is still going to be used, then hell yeah, I'm down for that shit

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Now the moment we've been waiting for. What do I have against Addi? Why do I find him annoying as a critic of zp? Grab a cup of maple syrup, because this'll be a doozy. I'll order my issues from least bothersome to the most.

His relationship with Gustav

Ok, I think we can all agree that this relationship was poorly done. While I myself have no problems with this pairing, the way Vivz had them come together was shit. Gustav looks like a pedo creep hitting on a student, and Addi looks like an idiot as he just lets Gustav insult one of his friends. Their relationship is hasty, and the only apparent attraction they have for each other is their looks (and Addi looking like a 12 year old doesn't really help Gustav's pedo case. Don't worry, any concerned readers, there isn't any pedophilia going on. Addi has apparently been aged up to 17, and Gustav is 19)

Just to clarify, hasty relationships in stories aren't in themselves a bad thing. This could serve as a reflection on both the characters. Perhaps they fall in love easily. Perhaps their just the type of people who'd do these sorts of things. The problem here is that Addi is the only one of the two who seems like he'd do this. It's stated by Dame (who could be hyperbolising here for all we know ) that Addi throws himself at guys very often. Gustav, however, doesn't seem to have anything about him that'd suggest he'd be down for dating someone he just met.

You know how this relationship could be fixed? Gustav is 19, so he would've graduated only a year or so ago. So, have him and Addi be old friends who hung out before Gustav graduated. Perhaps have them have an attraction to each other that was initially waved off by Gustav at first, but now he's back, he might be interested now. Also, have them be attracted to each other for more then just looks. Perhaps they respect each other's talents, perhaps they have similar interests. That'd make their relationship a little more believable.

His personality

You know, in all my time spent in the zp fan base, I've noticed that the majority of Addi fans like him because he's cute. Not because of his personality. Just because he's cute. I mean, I don't entirely blame them for focusing on his appearance more because his personality. .....woof.

Zoophobiacomic.com describes his personality as the following;

" Addison likes to keep to himself and spends most of his time working in the Art Wing. While he doesn’t often open up to others and can sometimes hide away an air of elitism, he has developed a close friendship with his classmates Damian and Sahara. Their outward energy and enthusiasm has begun to counteract Addison’s typically introverted nature"

So he's shy, and a bit of an elitist, and he's slowly becoming more self confident. Ok.....now let's look at what the comic itself presents us. For one thing, he's surprising sassy, especially in ch3, not just to Dame, but to Leeson the crazy priest as well. He's also surprisingly self centered. Look at how he reacts to Dame being a shit to other people compared to how he reacts to Dame being a shit to him. Orchestrating an event that gets your cousin set on fire? That's ok. Preventing Addi from going on a date? That bastard! He doesn't even seem to care when Gustav insults one of his best friends. He also doesn't show any regret about attacking Mackenzie. Him having these traits aren't a problem, but this raises a bit of a concern for me since I don't think this is the impression we're supposed to get from his character.

His dumbass decisions

Yes Addison, go off on a date with some sexy random dude when there's an entire organization after you and you have no way of defending yourself. 10/10. 100/100. A+. Gold Star, Gud Job, Perfect Logic, Go buy a colouring book you infant!

His PTSD

Let me get one thing strsight (so at least one thing in this post isn't gay af), I don't have an issue with him having PTSD. My problem is how it's handled. The story acts like Addi attacking Mackenzie is just peachy keen because it was triggered by his ptsd. Except guess what? It isn't.

I'm going to be honest, I (someone with more then one handicap) hate it when those with disabilities are treated like babies, and The world must conform to their needs, and nothing is their fault because mashed potatoes. Look, a handicap can affect how you live your life, but it doesn't mean you get a free ticket to easy street. If anything, your life gets harder. And guess what? People babying you and pretending that your disability prevents you from any fault DOESN'T HELP. IT MAKES YOU WORSE. I'll use one of my own handicaps as an example. I have Auditory Processing Disorder. One symptom is that I can't hear myself, do I often talk incredibly loudly without realising it. Now imagine I went through life always yelling because no one told me to take it down a peg. Soon, yelling would become a habit, and it'd be a much harder problem to fix.

You guys starting to realize why other characters acting like Addi did nothing wrong bothers me? That's not how you react when someone with a disability does something like Addi does. It also makes me concerned that the comic will continue down the route of "oh, he has a disorder, so he's not really at fault ", excusing various bad things Addi does on his PTSD.

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So now I've typed out enough words to rewrite the American constitution, I'll end it here. Thank you for reading, and tell me what you think. If you'd like to see me critique another character like this, feel free to request it.

I apologize for wasting your time.

-ATOUN

#zoophobia #zoophobia addison #zoophobia critique #zp #vivzmind

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