#too deep in this to work out if this is even insight at this point

[whinlatter]

Harry’s thoughts of Ginny in the Forest: a meta

‘Nothing too big, because you wouldn't be able to take it with you... I wanted you to have something to remember me by.' - DH, p. 99 (UK edition)

Here I am, on a rainy Thursday, doing re-reads for some writing and thinking about the parallels between Harry and Ginny's kiss on his birthday, and Harry’s thoughts of Ginny as he goes to his death. 

I’m thinking differently about Ginny’s motivations for the kiss these days. I used to think about her words to Harry that morning, and the act of kissing him, as a promise she’ll wait for when he comes back. Lately, I’m wondering if it’s not something sadder, and more profound. I think what Ginny does on Harry’s seventeenth is the act of a person who is starting to process the fact that the person she loves is likely going to his death — that he might not be coming back. It's a scene of a person bracing for grief and thinking about love after death, and it will set the stage for how Harry meets his own death in the Forest.

So here’s a much-too-long meta to help me think through these ideas - about the kiss, Ginny’s suspicions about Harry’s fate, and what it means that Harry returns to the memory of Ginny at the end of his life. (Stick the kettle on for this one and if you worked this all out long ago before me, just give me an eye roll and forgive me).

I’ve always taken Ginny's words to Harry before their kiss at face value. I thought of it not quite as a fun scene - it’s certainly sad - but sweet, a little sexy, and sort of reckless, even a bit mischievous on Ginny’s part.

It’s the birthday of the boy Ginny loves. They’re not together anymore. She knows he's going away. She wants to give him a birthday present, but she doesn't want to give him something he has to haul around or might lose. She does want to let him know that, despite their separation, her feelings are still the same. She craves a moment with him before he goes. She is still in love with him, she is deeply attracted to him, and part of her still feels a bit possessive. Although she’s not really concerned Harry’s going to crack on with some Veela, she does want him to have a memento of their time together. She wants him to have a happy memory, of physical intimacy and emotional comfort, to keep him going while he's away, to feel less alone.

Most of all, I used to think of the kiss (and whatever Ginny imagined might come after the kiss) as a promise. I still love you. Even though we’re not together and I respect why you have to go, I’m still all in on this. I’ll wait for you for when you come back. I want you to have the memory of this, as proof.

Harry’s reveal

But the more I’ve thought about it, the more I think about the context of when this kiss happens, after Harry and Ginny's last conversation before his birthday. It's the one a few days before, when Harry and Ginny are laying the table for dinner, and Harry lets slip to Ginny what he, Ron and Hermione will be doing when they leave:

'‘And then what does she think’s going to happen?’ Harry muttered. ‘Someone else might kill off Voldemort while she’s holding us here making vol-au-vents?’ He had spoken without thinking, and saw Ginny’s face whiten.‘So it’s true?’ she said. ‘That’s what you’re trying to do? ‘I - not - I was joking,’ said Harry evasively. (DH, 78-9, UK edition)

This is a desperately sad scene, but it’s also an important moment. Harry, so used to having his guard down with Ginny, realises he’s accidentally confessed something big: that he’s going on the run to try and kill Voldemort himself, with Ron and Hermione’s help. 

Ginny is shaken by this. As a character, she tends to either take things in her stride, or yells first, processes later. But this catches her off guard. Her words suggest there has been speculation about what it is the three of them are going off to do (‘So it’s true?’ suggests that Ginny, and perhaps other members of her family or the Order, have been speculating about this for some time). But both she and Harry realise here that he’s flippantly confirmed something huge that Ginny did not already know for sure. He’s spoken aloud the task is that Dumbledore has left him. 

It is a sign of how close Harry feels to Ginny, how safe he feels in her company, and how difficult he finds managing keeping secrets from her, that he lets this slip. He won’t come as close to telling the truth to anyone else, even people he trusts. The scene before this, in his conversation with Mrs Weasley, he didn’t let on nearly as much (though he admits that he found affirming the importance of secrecy difficult when he looked at Mrs Weasley and saw Ginny’s eyes staring back at him):

‘Well, Dumbledore left me . . . stuff to do,’ mumbled Harry. ‘Ron and Hermione know about it, and they want to come too.’ ‘What sort of ‘stuff’?’  ‘I’m sorry, I can’t—’  ‘Well, frankly I think Arthur and I have a right to know, and I’m sure Mr. and Mrs. Granger would agree!’ said Mrs. Weasley. Harry had been afraid of the “concerned parent” attack. He forced himself to look directly into her eyes, noticing as he did that they were precisely the same shade of brown as Ginny’s. This did not help… ‘Dumbledore didn’t want anyone else to know, Mrs. Weasley (…)  I didn’t misunderstand,’ said Harry flatly. ‘It’s got to be me.’ (DH, 77-8)

Later, he’ll also refuse to give any information to Lupin, for the same reason. 

'‘Can you confide in me what the mission is?’  Harry looked into the prematurely lined face, framed in thick but greying hair, and wished that he could return a different answer.  ‘I can’t, Remus, I’m sorry. If Dumbledore didn’t tell you I don’t think I can.’  ‘I thought you’d say that,’ said Lupin, looking disappointed.’ (DH, 173-4)

But with Ginny, he’s accidentally gone much further. He hasn’t said Horcruxes, but he’s as good as. The trio are setting off to try to kill Voldemort, the most dangerous task imaginable in this war. He tries, in vain, to undo it, but the damage is already done. Ginny knows more now than she did before: that the journey he’s about to go on is one that very likely will claim his life. 

What does Ginny know about Harry’s fate before this moment? 

It's clear from this interaction that Harry has never discussed any of this with Ginny before. In their breakup scene, Harry repeatedly said that he was breaking up with her for her own safety. He said he did not want her to be used as bait, as she already had been previously, and as Sirius was: 'Think how much danger you'll be in if we keep this up...' (HBP, 602). The focus was entirely on the risk to Ginny's life, a risk Harry says he cannot live with.

Ginny’s remarks at Dumbledore’s funeral told us something about how she, at that point, understood the path ahead for Harry. She made her half-joke that Harry was always busy saving the Wizarding World, and says she thinks he 'would never be happy', never fulfilled or satisfied, unless he were 'hunting Voldemort' (HBP, 603). She showed she interpreted his actions as choices being made by someone brave, determined, and personally committed to bringing about the end of Voldemort, not someone destined to. Harry’s motivations and reasons are ones she respects and empathises with. She knows the path ahead is dangerous. She doesn’t yet think of it as lethal. 

Harry didn’t respond to her assessments at the funeral, neither correcting nor confirming them. He didn’t let her know, at that stage, exactly what it is he is going to set off to do. The closest Harry came to revealing the road ahead for him in the break-up scene was this:

'It’s been like… like something out of someone else’s life, these last few weeks with you,' said Harry. 'But I can’t… we can’t… I’ve got things to do alone now.' She did not cry, she simply looked at him.’  (HBP, 602)

This is a pattern throughout their relationship, both as friends and later as romantic partners. Ginny knows a little, but not a lot, about Harry’s path. She thinks of it almost entirely as a decision he has made himself. Conversations about Harry’s destiny - about the Prophecy, about being the Chosen One, and, eventually, about the Horcrux hunt - happen near Ginny, but never with her. She does not seem to believe that Harry is the Chosen One or in any way bound to Voldemort's own fate. At the start of HBP, on the train in Slughorn’s carriage, Ginny states publicly her belief that any speculation about Harry being the Chosen One is nonsense: 

‘We never heard a prophecy,” said Neville, turning geranium pink as he said it. ‘That’s right,’ said Ginny staunchly. ‘Neville and I were both there too, and all this ‘Chosen One’ rubbish is just the Prophet making things up as usual.’ (HBP, 140)

Ultimately, before DH, Ginny has been given very little information. We can assume that she’s decided to respect Harry’s decision to keep any information from her and not to push for it. She has reason to fear he might be in danger, but she doesn’t yet know the full extent of it.

Ginny’s response

The immediate aftermath of Harry’s confession at the Burrow is very telling. 

‘They stared at each other, and there was something more than shock in Ginny’s expression. Suddenly Harry became aware that this was the first time that he had been alone with her since their stolen hours in secluded corners of the Hogwarts grounds. He was sure she was remembering them too.’ - DH (79)

It’s important that, immediately after this confession, Harry’s mind immediately takes him to private time spent alone with Ginny at the end of HBP. His certainty that Ginny, too, is reminiscing about them is typical of their wordless displays of understanding. They both reach for memories. And the memories of the last time he was alone with her, when they were still together, suddenly trigger an intense emotional and sexual tension. They are soon interrupted, and the dinner afterwards is extremely awkward. Harry wishes he were further away from Ginny, and tries, with great difficulty, to avoid touching her at the dinner table. The energy between them is intense and charged, anticipatory and frustrated. There are lots of ‘unsaid things’ that have just passed between them, and both are aware of it (DH, 79).

There are important themes being introduced here. Whenever Harry thinks about memories of his time with Ginny in DH, he does so consistently in two clear ways. To him, those times were private, intensely intimate moments which carried huge personal significance. It is strongly implied those were moments of sexual intimacy between the two of them, and where they shared an emotional closeness neither has found with any other character. But those moments with Ginny are also something Harry feels he was wrong to take. His relationship with her was something that, in retrospect, he embarked upon against his better judgement. He now feels it was something he was not entitled to, on account of his own burdens and obligations. Those were ‘stolen hours’ that were ‘something out of someone else’s life’. If we look to the wedding scene, we can see this most clearly:

‘‘Yes, my tiara sets off the whole thing nicely,’ said Auntie Muriel in a rather carrying whisper. ‘But I must say, Ginevra’s dress is far too low cut.’  Ginny glanced around, grinning, winked at Harry, then quickly faced the front again. Harry’s mind wandered a long way from the marquee, back to afternoons spent alone with Ginny in lonely parts of the school grounds. They seemed so long ago; they had always seemed too good to be true, as though he had been stealing shining hours from a normal person’s life, a person without a lightning-shaped scar on his forehead…’ (DH, 121) 

There are certain tropes at play here, that will that recur again and again in Harry’s thoughts of Ginny until the point of his death: the memory of time alone, the feeling of shared emotional and physical intimacy, to an intense degree; the sense of their time together being something stolen, both in the sense of it being snatched from within darker times, but also being forbidden, given with Harry’s fate when it comes to Voldemort. That Harry recalls these moments at a moment as two other characters make lifelong vows of marriage to each other is not insignificant: all is set up to maximise the sense of tragedy.

Ginny processing Harry’s fate

Ginny is not naive. Harry’s confession seems to change something about how she thinks about what he’s about to do. She may once have dismissed the prophecy of Harry as the Chosen One as nonsense. But she now has reason to suspect that might not quite be true.

She may well re-trace what she does know. After all, she was at the Department of Mysteries two summers prior, where she learnt that Voldemort, at least, thinks there is a prophecy of significance that involves Harry directly. She knows Harry has been having one-on-one lessons with Dumbledore: she even gave him one of the invitations (HBP, 228). She also knows that Harry and Dumbledore left school for a secret mission alone on the night the Astronomy Tower was attacked and Dumbledore was killed. She observed how Harry saw Dumbledore’s death as a catalyst to prepare for a path that required him to step back from her. Above all, we also know that Ginny is a character who understands Tom Riddle intimately. She is one of the people who comes closest to understanding the stakes of your life being bound, in some way, to Voldemort.

It is also significant that Ginny is a character canonically intrigued, and touched, by death, and by powerful Dark magic. The diary, and her own near-death experience, is the most obvious example. But in the Department of Mysteries during OotP, we are told she is also one of the characters most drawn to the veil, despite having far less direct experience of loss and grief than Harry, Luna, or even Neville:

‘[Harry] took several paces back from the dais and wrenched his eyes from the veil. ‘Let’s go,’ he said. ‘That’s what I’ve been trying to — well, come on, then!’ said Hermione, and she led the way back around the dais. On the other side, Ginny and Neville were staring, apparently entranced, at the veil too. Without speaking, Hermione took hold of Ginny’s arm, Ron Neville’s, and they marched them firmly back to the lowest stone bench and clambered all the way back up to the door.’ (OotP, 775)

I don’t mean to suggest Ginny knew what was coming for Harry, that she foresaw him having to go to his death. She knows nothing of Horcruxes, she doesn’t know the contents of the Prophecy, and she certainly doesn’t know Harry himself is a Horcrux. Harry, of course, doesn’t yet know the certainty of him going to his own death, at this point in the text. But given the information she alone has been handed, inadvertently, by Harry, she has plenty of reason to begin to suspect the path Harry is on is one that might end in death, moreso for him than for an anyone else in this war.

Ginny doesn’t appear much in the following pages, other than in her role helping to prepare the house for the wedding. Over the next few days, she has lots of time to consider Harry’s words. We know she’s also sharing a bedroom with Hermione, who is actively preparing for their imminent departure, and watching the three of them try to sneak off together to make plans. This is time for Ginny to start to digest the information Harry has unwittingly divulged. She can now begin to think about how she ought to respond to the prospect of him leaving for a mission that will, likely, cost him his life.

The kiss itself

We can see Ginny has planned this interaction with Harry in her bedroom. The false casualness of how the scene opens - ‘Harry, can you come in here a moment?’ - and the actions of the bedroom’s other occupant, Hermione, suggests some level of premeditation and collaboration. For the first time, Ginny brings him into her bedroom, with the door closed. The setting is obviously intimate and suggestive.

Harry describes Ginny as seeming nervous, but purposeful, like she is readying herself for something - she ‘[takes] a deep breath’. She is looking at him ‘steadily’. Harry is nervous, too: he cannot bring himself to look at her, finding it almost painful, like ‘gazing into a brilliant light’ (DH, 98). Her trademark blazing look is in full force. She doesn’t entertain his attempts at small talk: she is serious about what she’s about to do.

‘‘I couldn’t think what to get you,’ she said.  ‘You didn’t have to get me anything.’ She disregarded this too.’ (DH, 98-9)

Ginny opens by revealing how difficult it has been for her to work out what she could give him, under the circumstances. She is, in her own way, acknowledging how hard she is finding processing what it is he has to do now. She has been struggling with the prospect of Harry’s departure, and the possibility, even the likelihood, of his death. But she has decided she wants to make that path easier for him. Despite his reassurance, she insists she wanted to give him something. 

‘‘I didn’t know what would be useful. Nothing too big, because you wouldn’t be able to take it with you.” He chanced a glance at her. She was not tearful...' (99)

These lines are so significant. The first two lines in particular are deeply profound. They read very differently to how I first thought of them, if seen in this light. I didn’t know what would be useful, she says, because she doesn't know what she can say that will be useful. What could possibly make this easier, to help Harry think about the enormity of his situation, or to help guide him on a path requiring him to accept his own likely death? 

She doesn’t want what she gives to him now to be too heavy, too sad, or too serious, because she knows Harry will not be able to deal with it (‘nothing too big’). Anything too declaratory, too sentimental, or too enormous, would be impossible for him to leave with. In the last part of the sentence, her words are deliberately vague: because you wouldn’t be able to take it with you. 

I think this is the most poignant part, and it suggests the part of Ginny's mind that believes in, and is curious about, what happens beyond, after death: the voices on the other side of the veil. I think there is some part of her that thinks Harry might be going somewhere she can’t reach him - what Dumbledore will later call going on. Ginny does not openly speculate about where Harry will be taking whatever she gives him. That it could be to his own grave, or beyond, is left unspoken. He looks at her, finally, after these words, because he seems to understand, on some level, what she is trying to say to him.

‘She took a step closer to him. ‘So then I thought, I’d like you to have something to remember me by, you know, if you meet some veela when you’re off doing whatever you’re doing.’’ (DH, 99)

Ginny has decided: the thing she will give him is a memory, one that he can take with him when they part. Something to remember me by. She wants the memory of her, of them, to be useful, to serve him in some way, and to be something that he might be able to take on with him after death. She tries to soften what she’s trying to convey, with the joke about the veela. But both seem to understand what she is really saying: that she isn’t really asking for his loyalty or fidelity. She doesn’t say she’s giving him ‘something to remember me by’ for when he comes back and they can be together again. Her words are very final. The joke is supposed to make it easier for him to hear what she is saying: she’s telling him, quietly, how to think about her when he leaves, whatever leaving might mean.

Harry, for his part, continues the joke. (‘I think dating opportunities are going to be pretty thin on the ground, to be honest.’) She plays along, sort of, in a very sad way (‘there’s the silver lining I’ve been looking for’). But both seem to know that there is no real silver lining to this. 

And then there’s the kiss itself: 

‘There’s the silver lining I’ve been looking for,’ she whispered, and then she was kissing him as she had never kissed him before, and Harry was kissing her back, and it was blissful oblivion, better than Firewhisky; she was the only real thing in the world, Ginny, the feel of her, one hand at her back and one in her long, sweet-smelling hair —’ (DH, 99)

It all comes to a head here. Harry recognises that this kiss feels exceptional, unlike any other they’ve ever shared - that Ginny has never put so much into a kiss before. It is ‘blissful oblivion’, this moment of extraordinary intensity, where she kisses him and allows him, for a moment, to think only about her and them together. It’s heady and sexual (‘the feel of her’). It’s a gift for Harry  to be able to forget everything and let this moment be a vacuum, to focus only on her. The crescendo effect of the short causes and run-on sentences allows the moment to build and build, a crescendo effect that anticipates something to come. 

Of course, their moment gets interrupted, again. Unlike when Ron interrupted her with Dean, Ginny doesn't rage at him this time: she is subdued, a response that is far more appropriate for her processing the fact that she may have just had her final kiss with the boy she loves. Harry suspects she has started to cry, something he notes is out of character. Ginny had imbued a lot of meaning into this interaction: this is a portrait of a character whose heart is breaking.

When Harry and Ron are discussing the kiss outside on the lawn, after the initial shock of being yelled at by Ron for going anywhere near Ginny, Harry has his own, shattering realisation of what all of this means for himself and Ginny:

‘Yeah, but you go snogging her now and she’s just going to get her hopes up again—’ ‘She’s not an idiot, she knows it can’t happen, she’s not expecting us to— to end up married, or—’  As he said it, a vivid picture formed in Harry’s mind of Ginny in a white dress, marrying a tall, faceless, and unpleasant stranger. In one spiralling moment it seemed to hit him: Her future was free and unencumbered, whereas his . . . he could see nothing but Voldemort ahead.’ (DH, 100)

Thinking aloud, Harry says it would be idiotic for he or Ginny to imagine they could be together, either now, or at any point in the future. He expects her to find someone else; he cannot even begin to imagine a future for himself after the task set out for him. He does not say his inevitable death - he has not yet embraced that reality - but he remains caught in the certainty of an existential battle with Voldemort that he knows he may well not survive.

Later that day, Harry will receive the snitch from Dumbledore’s will. Though he doesn’t know it yet, he now holds the resurrection stone, the item that will open at the close in the forest. It is a birthday that starts and ends with hints about what little time he has left: the stage is set for an arc that, now, has to end in his own death.

Foreshadowing Ginny and the Forest

Moments foreshadowing the significance of the forest are all over Deathly Hallows. Sometimes, they mirror the moment of his own death; often, they are related to Ginny. When they leave the Ministry, with Ron splinched, clutching the Horcrux locket, they arrive in a forest. For a moment Harry’s heart ‘leaped’ at the thought that they were back in Hogwarts’ grounds, the site of so much of his earlier happiness with Ginny (DH, 221). When the trio hear that Ginny, Neville and Luna tried to steal the sword of Gryffindor, it is the Forbidden Forest they are sent to by Snape as punishment (248-9). Harry does not fear the Forest, and is consoled by the thought of Ginny serving detention there rather than anywhere else.

In the Forest of Dean, the scene where Ron returns begins with Harry thinking of Ginny. He sits at the mouth of the tent, wanting to look for Ginny on the Marauders’ Map, until he remembers it’s Christmastime and she is at the Burrow (297). Later, in a moment that mirrors his later walk to his death, he follows his mother - Snape’s patronus, the doe - into the woods, in order to recover and destroy the Horcrux, inching Harry’s own life closer to its close:

Though the darkness had swallowed her whole, [the doe’s] burnished image was still imprinted on his retinas; it obscured his vision, brightening when he lowered his eyelids, disorienting him. Now fear came: Her presence had meant safety. “Lumos!” he whispered, and the wand-tip ignited. The imprint of the doe faded away with every blink of his eyes as he stood there, listening to the sounds of the forest, to distant crackles of twigs…  He held the wand higher. Nobody ran out at him, no flash of green light burst from behind a tree. Why, then, had she led him to this spot?’ (DH, 299)

Foreshadowing Harry's end in the Forest means also foreshadowing Ginny's own appearance at the moment of his death.

Harry’s ‘death’ in the Forest 

In the final battle, Ginny is the last person Harry sees before he begins his walk into the Forest. He takes the words she says to the child on the ground as her final act of comfort. Harry hears them as if they are being spoken to him: 

‘He was feet away from her when he realised it was Ginny.  He stopped in his tracks. She was crouching over a girl who was whispering for her mother.  ‘It’s all right,’ Ginny was saying. ‘It’s okay. We’re going to get you inside.’  ‘But I want to go home,’ whispered the girl. ‘I don’t want to fight anymore!’ ‘I know,’ said Ginny, and her voice broke. ‘It’s going to be all right.’  Ripples of cold undulated over Harry’s skin. He wanted to shout out to the night, he wanted Ginny to know that he was there, he wanted her to know where he was going. He wanted to be stopped, to be dragged back, to be sent back home (...) Ginny was kneeling beside the injured girl now, holding her hand. With a huge effort Harry forced himself on. He thought he saw Ginny look around as he passed, and wondered whether she had seen someone walking nearby, but he did not speak, and he did not look back.’ (DH, 558-9)

Harry believes that this is his final moment with Ginny before he goes to die. A part of him wants her to know that it’s happening: he is leaving, at last. But he can't call to her, because he worries she will try and stop him, and he might let her. Instead, he walks on, and doesn’t look back. After watching Ginny comfort the girl crying for her mother, Harry then goes on to the Forest, and summons his own mother, his own family, to walk with him to his death.  

‘His body and mind felt oddly disconnected now, his limbs working without conscious instruction, as if he were passenger, not driver, in the body he was about to leave. The dead who walked beside him through the forest were much more real to him now that the living back at the castle: Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and all the others were the ones who felt like ghosts as he stumbled and slipped toward the end of his life, toward Voldemort. . . .' (DH, 561-2)

Harry is already preparing to go on from this world: his living loved ones are the ones he now feels furthest from. He stands now with the dead he has summoned, who recognise him and seem to have memories of him. He doesn't fear the dead: he is going to join them.

It’s the death scene itself that I think has subtle, but important parallels with the kiss scene much earlier. In both imagery and in writing style, the scene recalls that earlier moment, where Harry found himself on the edge of another kind of oblivion. There is this mounting, febrile sense of anticipation. There is a tension that is almost sexual, a dynamic injected into the scene through descriptions of Bellatrix’s body language and behaviour towards Voldemort:

‘Bellatrix, who had leapt to her feet, was looking eagerly from Voldemort to Harry, her breast heaving. The only things that moved were the flames and the snake, coiling and uncoiling in the glittering cage behind Voldemort’s head.’  (DH, 564)

The ugly parallel of Bellatrix and Voldemort is not supposed to show the pair as the mirror image of Harry and Ginny. Rather, it is a theme that recurs throughout the series to demonstrate the gulf between Harry, with his immense capacity for love, and Voldemort, with none. Bellatrix and Ginny are memorably paralleled twice in the series: once, at the Department of Mysteries, where Bellatrix moves to ‘torture the little girl’, and Harry steps in to prevent her (OotP, 783), and again in the final battle: 

'Bellatrix was still fighting too, fifty yards away from Voldemort, and like her master she dueled three at once: Hermione, Ginny, and Luna, all battling their hardest, but Bellatrix was equal to them, and Harry’s attention was diverted as a Killing Curse shot so close to Ginny that she missed death by an inch—  He changed course, running at Bellatrix rather than Voldemort, but before he had gone a few steps he was knocked sideways…’ (DH, 589)

As Harry waits for the killing curse, we see the most direct parallel with Ginny's final kiss to him:

‘None of the Death Eaters moved. They were waiting: everything was waiting. Hagrid was struggling, and Bellatrix was panting, and Harry thought inexplicably of Ginny, and her blazing look, and the feel of her lips on his — ’ (DH, 564)

There's such an intense physicality and breathlessness to the whole scene, and an enduring pseudo-sexual tension, with Bellatrix audibly panting. Even the sentence structure even invokes the kissing scene: the run-on build up of clauses, the repetition of the present participle to actively hold the reader in one present moment, building and building and ending on a dash, the promise of something more.

At the end of his life, Harry returns to the memory Ginny gave him. She meant for it to be useful, if he was to go to his death. And at the close of his life he chooses to use it, as he prepares to leave her behind in this world and depart for the next. Just as the Resurrection Stone helped accept death, so too does the memory of Ginny. He feels the memory of her, the sensation of physical touch and of being kissed, the look she gives him that he knows as one of love and great courage. As he is killed, he remembers her last gift to him, the certainty of her love for him impressed upon him.

--

There's a line in OotP that I think is such an underrated line that sums up who Ginny is as a character. Harry is trying to get to Umbridge's fire to speak to Sirius when he thinks the latter is being tortured at the Ministry; Hermione suggests using Ginny and Luna as a distraction, despite Harry's objections:

'Though clearly struggling to understand what was going on, Ginny said immediately, ‘Yeah, we’ll do it,'... (OotP, 736)

This is who Ginny is. It's especially who she is to Harry, during the war. She doesn't fully know what's actually being asked of Harry (and, by extension, what is being asked of her, as the person who loves him, and who has most to lose if he is to die). But even when kept in the dark, she is enormously selfless, and her biggest act of bravery is extremely quiet. She keeps the secret Harry accidentally bestows on her, and she realises, in some sense, before he does, what it will likely mean for his life. She chooses to let him go on, knowing that he is loved, to make the path that he is on a little bit easier, even when she has realised that it will take him away from her for good.

[23meteorstreet]

after finishing s14 it’s definitely the weakest season of the show... big mo was good but the eps before it felt like a chore to get through and i’d literally watch these characters do anything

[astrolovecosmos]

If you're a writer take a look at your Mercury placement for inspiration 🖋️

1st House: Baby you're the inspiration! Dig deep into your identity and practice introspection for your work.

2nd House: What do you value? What will you work hard for, protect, collect? Use that for your inspiration! Maybe take inspiration from the material world or nature as well.

3rd House: Pay attention to your community and family (especially siblings, extended family, and family arguments or rivalry) for inspiration. Knowledge and research may be your best friend as a writer. Speak your mind and explore your emotions through writing, journaling, or blogging.

4th House: Family, home, your private life, or maybe your own inner world of coping, emotional sensitivity, and depth are your muse!

5th House: Having fun with your words and stories may be a good starting point! This is the house of creativity, joy, and celebration. Here creativity should stem from passion, discovery, and maybe romance. Be brave and even dramatic or ridiculous in how you write and how you get inspiration.

6th House: The house of routine, health, and work may not sound very inspiring but things like daily writing exercises or challenges may be very helpful for you. Time management and aiming to reach goals with your writing is going to be highly productive. Inspiration for you may come from ideas around altruism and what makes you feel like you're making a difference.

7th House: Take your inspiration from your relationships, fights, competition, rivalry, deals, and romance. Seek inspiration in others. Find a true muse.

8th House: The skeletons in your closet may be the best inspiration. Your fears, secrets, pain, depth, and vulnerability.

9th House: Your beliefs can be a major source for inspiration/creativity. Taking inspiration from other works, research, and knowledge may be your style too. Diving into a subject like history, sociology, psychology, religion, laws, journalism, politics, etc. can be very motivating.

10th House: Rely on your sense of purpose to give you inspiration. Reflecting on society or authority can give insight too.

11th House: Look to your friends for inspiration and friendship dynamics! Zooming out to collective trends and feelings can be a powerful tool as well for your writings. Tap into your aspirations and highest dreams too.

12th House: Using writing as a tool to explore your subconscious may be useful. Taking inspiration from your dreams, imagination, and even the darkest parts of you may be key for you as a writer.

[coral-melon]

Tangled Nightmare!

Obey me! Brothers x Curly!MC (reader)

Genre: Crack/shenanigans, Fluff; slightly suggestive?

No pronouns said but probably AFAB

Hopefully isn’t too OOC ._ .🤞

Summary: Your hair is being impossible and you need help detangling your hair. This is for my hella curly hair peeps! Kinda slightly self-indulgent too.. but my other peeps are more than welcome to imagine themselves here!

You’ve been procrastinating over when you felt like washing and do your hair. Under normal circumstances, you do your hair once a week. You kinda skipped it though, saying it didn’t look bad at all — which it wasn’t, why even take the life out of it when it could last a bit longer? It’s been 3 weeks…

Today was the day you were ready to do your hair! Your take out your brushes, washing and styling products. You got everything ready to just be in a happy, productive mood. What could possibly go wrong?

-Dun dun- your hair was impossible! You wash and put plenty of conditioner but your brush just wouldn’t go through! Your arms were tired and your hands were getting cramps; you’ve been at it for a while and tried many things, but nothing! You were on the verge of giving up and going bald, but you go to your last resort, getting another pair of hands and eyes. So you summon your boyfriend!

Lucifer

This man was busy buried in his yet again endless mountains of paperwork. He was so close to just drowning himself in demonus to get by at this point..

But suddenly, he hears your call and the dreadful scene was changed when he was summoned… to the bathroom?

He then sees you, peeking through the shower curtains, bawling your eyes out. He was about to scold you for calling him at such a busy hour, but the thought was kicked right out the window at the sight of seeing your tearful eyes. He keeps his composure though; he needs to understand the situation at hand, after all.

— “My dear, what happens?” He asks as he got closer to you.

— “Lucifer, please help me! I’m on the verge of shaving it all off!” You say after taking a deep breath.

He’s a bit confused at first, but when you reveal the utter mess you had on your head, he understood what you were so frantic about; but at the same time, he was still dumbfounded. He clears throat, and asks you what you need him to do.

You wouldn’t be able to tell that he’s actively stressing on the inside, he’s graceful at everything he does even if he doesn’t have the slightest clue of what he’s doing.

He couldn’t help his mind to.. slightly wonder off. You had sat down on the bathtub with your back facing him, told him how he could pull your hair as much as he wanted.. as long as it detangled the knots, of course!

He had always been infatuated with your curls, but this experience gave him an insight of just how much effort you put into making it look how it always does.

This was also quite satisfying to him, it destressed him to the point where he almost forgot about the work that was still waiting for him at his office.. And for you, it felt like a heavenly massage.. he’ll check you every now to make sure you’re alright.

It took a while, but him being him, everything worked out in the end! Your curls finally softened and ever so defined✨

You thank him profusely, saying that you wouldn’t know what you’d do with yourself it it weren’t for him.

But he simply looked at you with a sinister gentle smile and darkened eyes..

— "I presume that you already know this means that you have a great price to pay for taking up my time, correct..? I suggest you don't keep me waiting for long."

Mammon

Your summon was literally a blessing, he was in a bit of a tight spot with some witches and you saved him in the nick of time!

— “Mammon, you gotta help me!” So I guess it’s only fair he helped you too..

You explain to him what’s going on in a frantic state, would ask you to go to a hair salon, but you starting crying about how expensive that would be. 100% understands and doesn’t question it any farther. So he tries to calm you down, saying he gots this!

— “Ha! Don’cha even worry about it! The great Mammon’s gonna handle this; no problem!✨💪🏽”

His confidence gave you reassurance and put you at ease, you were finally saved! He’d be decent at it, it’s not as unbearable at all and would be soothing to the point of falling soundly asleep.. if he wasn’t so on and off about it!

You’d eventually learn that he just couldn’t help but get distracted by your naked body. Your back facing him, fully exposed to him.. And your hair was just perfect.. ack! Nono! None of that right now! If he could, he’d worship you.

He’d be like: Lord have mercy.. We must stay focused, bothers! We must. Stay focused!

Fell in love with you over and over again every time he passed the brush through you hair. Watching intently how your hair curled so beautifully..

Every now and then, the thought of selling a bit of your hair also came to mind. But quickly gets rid of the idea; you worked how to maintain it, you’d kill him if he chopped it!

Overall, pretty nice and bonding experience. Later thinks about how he wants you to do the same for him.. But he could never admit that out loud!

Feels all high and mighty when you thank him! Of course you should be grateful to him; He took the time out of his busy schedule to help you out and everything! …Kinda forgetting the fact that he would’ve been roasted by witches if it weren’t for you.

— “Hmph, nothin’ I couldn’t handle! Though that’s gonna cost ya a hefty pri—! Oi wait wait! I’m jokin, I’m jokin!… Half joking..”

Leviathan

He was in the middle of choosing a spot to proudly display he’s latest figure collection. But that was soon interrupted when he was summoned to the bathroom.

You call for him as you peek through the shower curtain, motioning him to come closer. He freezes for a moment, until he finally realizes that his in the same room as you while you’re naked.

Proceeds to do that Finn scream*

— “Levi. Levi! Do not freak out, cuz I’m freaking out; and we can’t have two people freaking out! It just doesn’t work. You’re the only one that can help me!” You say, trying to have him not run out on you.

After some back and forth bickering and convincing, you finally managed to get him the courage he needed to help you out!

Don’t look at him though; especially not in the eyes, he’ll simply die.💀

He’s face will be completely red the whole time, you would think he’d pass out at some point… don’t get me wrong, he did — almost. You give him an idea to summon something that’ll splash him with cold water whenever he started to wobble.

In his head, there’s two voices: the one that’s been constantly screaming, and the one that is pretty much worshiping every time he strokes you hair.

Oh, Lemme give you some hope. -Ahem-🎤Don’t be fooled though! This guy does cosplay, therefore knows to do hair. Prove me otherwise!

Knows exactly how to deal with knots without ruining the hair, so at least it wasn’t painful! Your hair is far too sacred for him to mess up!

Once he finishes, there’s a short moment where he feels so proud of himself. But whatever was gripping onto the thin strand keeping his soul together breaks after you gave him a wide smile and thanked him for saving you!

— [ERROR] Levichan.exe does not compute.

Satan

He was getting mad over something, though he himself didn’t know what it was. So he was gonna go destress by flipping Lucifer off but you suddenly summonsed him.

He sensed you were frustrated before he could even see you. So it didn’t come as a surprise when you peeked through while gripping the shower curtains and heated tears in your eyes.

— “What happened, sweetheart?”

— “I’m this close to going apeshit and ripping my hair out.. Please help me!”

Doesn’t know how to handle curly hair, of course. But he’s willing to try. After all, He can’t just leave you like that! Your hair is like a work of art to him, so he wouldn’t want you shaving it off in a pit of rage! You got lucky this time, Lucifer..

Welp, he found a new coping mechanism! This was like a puzzle for him to solve, one that would also make you happy and him quite quite satisfied in the end. That was enough for him to get him going.

He was firm with how he handled you tangled hair, but in a good way. He did his best to not pull too hard and hurt you accidentally.

Keeps it respectful. But~ I do imagine his hands would go through your scalp and gently pulls on the roots of your hair in a very teasing manner. Will play dumb if you ask about it. ((Ever seen that hair pull massage video? Yeah, that))

And/Or, will play with your hair a bit like cats do when they’re massaging their paws onto something soft.

All in all, you’ll feel like you’ve ascended into a new level of lightheadedness with how at ease you head feel. Whatever headache you had a moment ago is long gone!

He comes to appreciate your hair a lot more after this; he’s a blond with short straight hair, so he didn’t fully grasp just how much work it actually is to maintain you hair.. See? A work of art!

He’s already thinking of the next time he could do this. Like I said before, this was his new coping mechanism and I don’t think you can’t do anything about it once he made up his mind.

— “You should let me do this again the next time you wash your hair, it was a very pleasing experience..”

Asmodeous

While in the middle of choosing what perfume and lipstick to where to the day, he could already sense beauty troubles before you could even think about summoning him.

When your call beckons him to come, he is ready. You peek through the curtains with tearful eyes, too embarrassed to really want to show him the mess that happened but not really having a choice at this point.

— “Love, Don’t even say a word! Asmo’s here to help~♡”

Gets immediately to work! He already had his hair products ready. You would think it’s kinda unnecessary to have as many products as he had on hand, but why even question it?

And ooh, how flawless he was.. You felt like you were at a spa with how at ease you felt. You could hear him cry out every now and then, saying how awfully tangled your hair was. But not once did you feel any pain.

But when he isn’t crying, he talks to you like hairstylists do at a hair salon. He tells you about some gossip he heard at Majolish and some products he’s planning on sharing with you. He asks you some questions and all in all, have a good time together. It’s honestly very fun!

By the end of it all, you’ve never felt more replenished. Your curls look the liveliest they’ve ever been, and you hadn’t even added your hair products or defused it!

He finished way quicker than what you would’ve taken. You probably still would’ve been only have way after all this time.

He’ll be fawning over you and saying how obsessed he is about your curls. ..but might start getting touchy since he hadn’t during that whole time. Which is kinda surprising he lasted this long.

— “Why don’t we go straight to my room? I’d love to try some hairstyles and new products on you!… Oh, no need to put clothes on, hon~ ;)”

Beelzebub

He was in the middle of doing some warmups before starting his regular workout routines. So imagine his surprise when he suddenly ends up in the bathroom.

But what surprised him even more was you peeking through the shower curtain, barely being able to hold your tears of frustration. Though you can’t stay feeling that way for long when you have a big fella worrying and asking you what’s wrong.

— “I need another pair of hands and eyes.. Could you help me out?” You say and laugh sheepishly.

— “Y-Yeah, sure! Just tell me what do to..”

The last thing he expected was to do your hair and has no experience whatsoever. But he’s washed and bushed Belphie’s hair before, so how hard can it be?

You two really need to stop underestimating the situation.💀👍

Has no idea what he’s doing but he will be so gentle! He also apologizes softly every time he pulls and brushes your hair, which is quite often.

His hands went through your hair so nicely, massaging your scalp and often playing with your hair. Your hair is so pretty..! So pretty.. it looks good… very good..

— “Beel, do not eat my hair!”

— “Oh, right. Sorry..”

But, I mean come on! Based on his logic, Your hair looks and feels so good.. it even smells amazing! So why wouldn’t it taste good too? It’s very tempting👀✨ if you want a speedy haircut, he’s your guy!

Very good at following directions, and appreciates that you tell him to divide your hair into sections to that it’s easier for him to detangle the knots. He makes sure to ask if it hurts or if you’re doing alright.

Also very respectful! Keeps his eyes where he should be putting them, doesn’t touch you where he shouldn’t and doesn’t make the situation weird; he would never want to make you feel uncomfortable. Though you can see that there’s a soft hint of blush decorating his cheeks..

This ends up being the most unique workout for him, one that required a hella amount of delicacy and patience. And self control.

You thank him for helping you out, joking about how you would’ve just shaved it all off if you couldn’t do it. He’s just happy that your happy.

*Growl..* “Oh, I’m starving now. I’ll head toward the kitchen so come join me when you’re done, okay?”

Belphegor

Obviously sleeping in some who knows where corner in the most uncomfortable position imaginable. Your summon kinda saves him from that.

This guy was dumbfounded when you asked him to help you with your hair. Like, don’t you know him?? He hasn’t even brushed his own hair this week, you think he can handle your hair?!

— “Belphie, Please! I can’t just ask someone else!”

— “Go to the hair salon or something!”

— “Don’t you know how expensive that is?? They’ll charge me a shit ton!”

He can’t refuse you when you’re this distressed about what’s going on. So he’ll reluctantly agree to help you, but doesn’t promise to do a good job. Will ask again if you’re sure you want him to help you; ..oh well, your decision.

Decides that the best course of action..! Is to look it up in DevilTube. Ain’t no way this mans knows what he’s doing.

There’s a 75% chance you’ll end up worse than when how you started. His movements are so stiff, and awkward, way too rough for your scalp, and all in all, just ass.

Will sarcastically tell you to just leave it like that, it’ll work fine as a pillow. That, of course, is not an option.

He’ll also play with your hair, making a bubble tower; and if possible? Make shapes with your hair. I’m telling you, your hair will get a lot worse with him ;—;

But lo and behold, if a miracle happens and somehow managed to detangle it? You’ll never skip a week of your hair routine. This horrible learning experience taught you that routines are very important or else all hell will break lose.

He never exercise, so imagine how how numb and exhausted his arms will feel after this?? Got to learn where you get most of your strength from even if you don’t look strong.. will want to make you just as exhausted as he feel. Do with that information what you will.

Moral of the story, don’t ask Belphie to help you. You’re better off doing it yourself!👍

— *huff, huff* “Your hair must be one of hell’s miserable wonders.. *Pant* You owe me a long cuddle session after this..!”

End

My magic wouldn’t work on Belphie’s dialogue.. ;-;

But Oh god, I had so much fun with this! I could stop laughing at some of them when I kept imagining them in my head. So I hope you too also had a good laugh when reading this! ^^⸝⸝

[luciddownloading]

Tarot Reading: What Are Your Intuitive or Psychic Gifts? 👁️

So, it's been a LONG time since I did a Tarot reading on here. I think it's more so been a case of not wanting to just spit one out to make more content and waiting til I felt inspired to do another one. So, the inspiration hit and guess who's back? Back again. Pick a card's back, tell a friend.

Okay, seriously, we are going to be delving into your intuitive or psychic gifts today. I do think there is a distinction between both. Psychic ability IS intuition but it's a particular gift, like being clairvoyant or a medium or a channeler, while intuitive ability is being able to effortlessly or unconsciously do something.

Intuitive powers are automatic and can't be taught or explained. Psychic powers are intuitive yet give you specific knowledge of or insight into something you otherwise wouldn't know.

Everyone has intuitive abilities. I personally don't think everyone has psychic ability (at least not at this point in human society) but most people who are very into spirituality do, like you fine folks, and even certain people who have not awakened yet.

So, we will be addressing both of these abilities in this reading. It may serve as confirmation for what you already know or it could open your eyes to one of your abilities. Pick the picture or pictures below that you're most drawn to and see what your pile has to tell you! As always, only take it if it resonates.

Today's theme for the pictures is cats. Did you know that cats are highly intuitive animals with very psychic abilities? They are able to easily see and interact with spirits. Ancient Egyptians also saw them as a bridge between the earthly realm and the afterlife. Maybe that's why some people these days are scared of cats or unsettled by them. They're too powerful! (Meanwhile, it's one of the reasons why I feel so connected to cats 😻)

PILE 1

PILE 2

PILE 3

PILE 4

PILE 1

Ten of Cups

(clarified by: The High Priestess)

Two of Swords

(clarified by: Nine of Pentacles)

Six of Wands

(clarified by: The Empress)

The Emperor (back of the deck)

First off, Pile 1, you are blessed with some super-powerful Divine Feminine energy. This femininity isn't something you have to learn. It comes so naturally to you. It could just be a matter of you needing to unlearn certain masculine approaches that would inhibit your authentic self. Of course, everyone has some amount of both masculine and feminine within and I don't think you need to be told that. You inherently know that. But, you are at your best when leading with your feminine traits. Having a more feminine approach to life.

The thing is that you win at life when you're leading with your Divine Feminine self. You might be surprised to find how amazingly everything falls into place when you're fully receptive or rely on your intuition (your intuition is very, very strong, by the way, but I'll get to that). It can make your life look or feel sort of "backwards" to other people. The things that everyone else does to succeed don't really work for you. So, when you try to "hustle" and "grind", you fall flat. But, when you allow yourself to flow with the natural rhythm of your own energy/body as well as life, then everything works out perfectly. This is a big message your Guides want to relay, maybe because you're struggling with this very problem currently. I think you know this, deep down, but you might still not be fully committing to this way of living.

I am also being told that you work very well with Gaia, aka Mother Earth. If you were thinking of taking up planting or gardening, you have a green light to do it. The energy of this pile is very green. You have a very green thumb as well as a really open and very powerful heart chakra. Everything and everyone flourishes under your warm, loving care, whether that's plants and flowers or actual people. You have this very grounded nurturing energy. It's earthy and solid and comforting. You might have either your Moon or Venus in an Earth sign, especially Taurus or Virgo. I am also being told that you affect people like Mother Earth. You play that role in others' lives. Just like our society is now realizing, too late, that it has taken Nature for granted and is feeling the very devastating effect of that, people feel the karmic backlash of not treating you right. For some, it's like, without you nourishing them, they start to wither away, on some level. (This is especially true of a few masculines from your past and you know who they are lol)

You also have exceptional psychic prowess, as any formidable Divine Feminine being does. I am specifically getting that you may come from a very matriarchal lineage, on either your mom or dad's side. Most likely your mom's. A very female dominated family. And I think you inherited certain psychic gifts from a female ancestor or there's something there about a past life with her involving magic, spirituality or esoteric wisdom. I feel like it could have something to do with clairvoyance or it might also involve paganism or the craft. Whatever it is, it is a birthright of sorts and is the key to you living a happier life. Maybe happier than others in your family who did not follow this path.

I feel like this female ancestor is acting as a Guide to you. For some of you, this is your mother or grandmother; someone you knew in this life. But, for most of you, she is an ancestor from further down the line that you might not have known in this life but are very connected to. There is a big message here from her about being in charge of your life. Because this pile has such a strong feminine energy, it's very easy for people to take you for granted or want to undermine you. People often resent your power and see it before you do and many try to tear you down or discredit you to control you. Another message that I feel is a big theme of your life.

This Guide is very familiar with that herself from her prior life in your family and I think she didn't quite have the chance to fully empower herself. Something about a controlling or toxic husband she had or maybe a father figure. I think you have gone through similar struggles but you have the ability to intensely take your power back. This is what some people resent. Part of your ability to do this is this Guide helping you but it's also your innate power. You might have a Scorpio influence in your chart. Your Guide wants you to put a lot of effort into developing whatever your magical power is, whether it's being a witch or clairvoyant or a spiritual teacher, because it will allow you to take control of your life. You might feel like you are sort of powerless right now but there is tremendous power within if you just tap into it.

///////

PILE 2

The World

(clarified by: The Sun)

The Lovers

(clarified by: Ace of Pentacles)

Seven of Swords

(clarified by: Knight of Wands)

Three of Wands (back of the deck)

Pile 2, I am getting a really interesting message here. Don't take this the wrong way but an intuitive ability you have is that you are like this trickster spirit in human form. The term "trickster" unfortunately has entirely negative connotations when that's not always the case. Although some tricksters are actually malicious and harmful in their deception, other tricksters "deceive" you only to shift your perspective. More high-vibe tricksters can create chaos or confusion but the creative kind that shakes people up and forces them out of their comfort zone. However, even good tricksters are often labeled as bad or scary by those who aren't seeing them clearly. Sound familiar?

Although you could be someone's worst nightmare if you chose, you're most likely the good trickster: mischievous, maybe maddening to some, but crucial to their growth. You might have a significant Gemini influence in your chart. People can project their negative feelings on to you and scapegoat you just because they're triggered or threatened by the energy you embody. But, you really don't mean any harm. Are you familiar with the "heyoka empath" concept? Because you could possibly be one and might want to look into that. The heyoka empath journey is all about being this psychological mirror to others, reflecting their wounds or flaws or even their strengths and potential back to them and triggering them to get them to grow.

(Side note: for anyone offended by the use of the Native American term "heyoka", I personally see it as more of a figure of speech. Not the literal cultural title. As someone who identifies as this type of empath, it's too resonant to dismiss. I also like to use "mirror empath" as a substitute, for those opposed to saying heyoka, as that's the essential meaning of it. But, do what works for you!)

Heyoka empaths are not the typical empaths, behavior wise. They are very sensitive but also defiant, headstrong, and unafraid to rock the boat. Sometimes even contrarian. You liberate people through your example, showing them that they don't have to conform or be a follower. Your fierce ability to think for yourself, to be your own person, is very much ingrained. I am willing to bet that you were not raised to be such an independent spirit. It's just something you innately understand. In fact, you might play this triggering role for your family, too, because you could fly in the face of outdated ways of thinking or doing things that keep them trapped. Yeah, I am getting that you have inspired your family majorly in this way, even your parents, although they may label you as "difficult" or the black sheep.

As an empath, you are especially clairsentient. In fact, you need a LOT of help in separating your emotions from others, which is something your Guides really want to help you with. The way people project heavily on you doesn't make it any easier. I think your psychic power also stems from how much you can predict people's reactions or behavior. This is why you can also be an expert button pusher. You might know what people are going to say before they say it or when people will call. This is your clairsentience because you FEEL it coming. You might also feel people's emotions from a far distance. Yeah, that is a specific message. There are certain connections you have where you know what the other is feeling from hundreds of miles away (it might even be long distance). Again, this can be very distressing or destabilizing if you don't stay grounded.

You definitely change people's lives. I am hearing "this stops with me". Heyoka empaths have this profound impact on others and leave people forever changed after knowing them. Whether you relate to this term or not, it's true of you! I feel like you have been in many relationships with toxic or immature romantic partners or friends. And, honey, once you call them on their shit, they are NEVER the same. Sometimes, this shift doesn't happen until you break up with them or leave them behind. But, whatever negative pattern they were indulging in before, they just can't get away with it anymore after being with you. You shine a light on their shadows that they can't ignore. And the thing is that you often don't even know you're doing it!

You could have a strong Fire influence in your chart (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius), especially Leo. You are this larger-than-life force and leave an indelible mark on others. I think you don't realize how very powerful it is when you call someone out or tell them off. (I am also getting the message to be a bit more careful with your words because of this) You leave others shook because they know you're right about them, whether they admit it or not, or they feel like you see right through them. There is clairvoyance here, too, in that regard. But, I think there's a pattern in your life where exes or former friends really change their negative ways because of you. Family members can do this, too, especially ones you've cut off. If you come from a toxic family, you are absolutely the cycle-breaker. And you may underestimate that but please pat yourself on the back for that because it is not easy and most people just continue the cycle. You work a lot on yourself because you are also quick to call yourself on your own bullshit. You're just exceptional and I can see your Guides applauding you for what you've done and are still doing. (Insert the "you're doing amazing, sweetie" gif)

/////////

PILE 3

King of Wands

(clarified by: Seven of Wands)

Ten of Wands

(clarified by: Eight of Pentacles)

Three of Cups

(clarified by: The Magician)

Ace of Pentacles (back of the deck)

Pile 3, you are my pile that is more resistant to your psychic powers. This is constantly coming up when I discuss psychic abilities in my readings. So, you may have heard this from me before. But, obviously, you need to hear it again! Lol you're a much more practical person. Even though I can see you are highly connected to Spirit, you ignore or downplay this connection to focus on the material/physical realm. And it is wearing you out!

You could have a strong Earth influence (the signs of Taurus, Virgo or Capricorn) in your chart. You prefer to look at and do things the pragmatic way. Take manifestation, for example. You are probably very skeptical of manifesting and would rather put in effort and work hard to get what you want. There's a big emphasis here on feeling like you need to "earn it" and this may come from a more conservative or traditional upbringing. But, here's the thing. You are actually exceptional when it comes to manifesting! That's a big message coming through. Part of this is because you know how to put in the physical effort. You'd never just sit back and do nothing and wait for it. Well... some of that is part of your problem. You don't realize that you don't have to DO so much to get what you want. That you can be clear about it, set your intention and let go. Yes, a certain amount of effort is required. But, not nearly as much as you think!

You could currently be having financial struggles that are either persisting or getting worse because you aren't sitting back enough. You either worry too much about your goals or try to control everything too much. You start stressing about the outcome and that disturbs the flow of events. You need to learn to trust in the Universe and let things unfold naturally. Everything can't be up to you! Your Guides, for instance, would love to step in more to assist you. In fact, they are very eager to and it is tough for them to see you burn out and try to do it all alone. Again, your upbringing may have made you like this. But, being hyper-independent or using self-sufficiency as a defense mechanism can keep you blocked spiritually. Your Guides aren't scolding you for this. They're saying it with love and also because they can't step in on your behalf unless you let them or call on them.

There is one Guide, in particular, who is always around you and always trying to help. This Guide has a very masculine energy, very fiery and vibrant yet paternal. Very paternal and protective. It could actually be a passed-on father figure from this life but I don't get that for all of you. He is specifically saying that he is always here. Whether you want him to be or not! Lol he is pretty cheeky and funny. I think also that some stressful things in your life or things you find annoying are actually his doing. Not to punish or irritate you but to show you where you need help. Essentially, he wants you to know that it's not bad to seek help or guidance. This is what he is there for! And your life would be significantly easier if you just accepted what he is trying to teach you or offer to you.

Interestingly, unlike the other piles, I am not getting a lot about particular gifts and abilities. This is more about removing or overcoming the blockages to your gifts and abilities. I think whatever it is you can do, on a psychic or intuitive level, is something you're meant to discover yourself. You could discover it through spiritual work and practices. You are being called to devote a lot of time to a particular form of divination or spiritual teaching; something like Tarot or astrology or Reiki healing. This can be a passionate hobby but, for many of you, I am getting the sense that it's meant to be your line of work. Your profession. You are meant to mix the spiritual with the practical, to apply your insane work ethic to something metaphysical (Random download: some of you may have Mars or Saturn in the 12th or Saturn in aspect to Neptune, particularly Saturn conjunct Neptune in Capricorn)

In dedicating yourself to spiritual work, you will begin to unlock and discover your psychic gifts. And you won't even realize you're doing it, much of the time! You could downplay your gift and say, "Oh, I'm just reading the cards" or "It's the birth chart, it's not me". All while not realizing that you're making yourself a channel for the Divine. I think a lot of this is meant to feel very automatic and something you're not aware of. This is how your Guides communicate with you, too. You might be especially clairaudient because you could easily interpret your inner monologue as your own thoughts instead of realizing it's your Guides talking to you and you're just hearing it in your voice. You won't be able to consciously access your psychic gifts until you indirectly do so via these spiritual disciplines (And I know I have given this message before in a previous reading)

Yet, you will need to protect yourself, stay grounded, and make sure you are managing your psychic energies. When you don't understand your gift, it can drain you of your energy. And you're very gifted! You could have clairvoyance, clairsentience, claircognizance and clairaudience, all at once. You are very blessed in this way. You also have to be careful what you wish for, going back to the effortless manifesting skills. Whatever you put out will take form, more so than the next person. On a more pragmatic level, I think you guys have the gift of either being introverted extroverts or just introverts who knows how to act extroverted in social settings. (Check your MBTI type!) You have the magical ability to manipulate your own energy and project whatever you want to others. And it's VERY convincing. It may be why people think you're incredibly capable or have your shit perfectly together, even if you don't feel that way at all inside. Sometimes, this means people don't really see you clearly, which is a blessing and a curse. They may have an exaggerated impression of you but this can also help you conceal your weaknesses or insecurities.

////////

PILE 4

Ace of Swords

(clarified by: Justice)

Six of Cups

(clarified by: The Fool)

King of Wands

(clarified by: The Devil)

Four of Swords (back of the deck)

Pile 4, you have this incredible ability to make people feel comfortable around you, like they can just stop worrying and relax. You disarm people and they may share their deepest secrets and feelings with you. If you regularly get people you meet on the subway or at a party telling you their life story, then this is your pile! You can easily feel overwhelmed by other people, though. The unfortunate thing about this ability is that people just take and take so much of your energy that you have nothing left to give. Being around someone so healing can be like a drug, especially for low-vibrational or especially unhealed people. While some may be using you or taking advantage of your kindness, others may not even realize they're having a negative effect or doing you harm. But, it would be no surprise if, after a long day of dealing with people, you need plenty of alone time to recharge.

Your Guides are coming through to tell you to uphold any practices that help you "spiritually/energetically/emotionally detox". There are many examples of this, from taking a long bath to being out in nature to meditating and centering to journaling. Whatever makes you feel good and at peace. You are also being told to not feel guilty for taking this time and to make space in your schedule for it. No matter what your situation is. You could run your own business or have a very active social life or be a busy parent. But, regardless of who needs your time and attention, you need to carve out a certain amount of daily time to replenish in whatever way you desire. If not, you will feel increasingly depleted and this can manifest in destructive ways. As kind and empathic as you are, you could become testy or sharp-tongued whenever you are being pushed past your limit. Or you could just become overwhelmed with anxiety and nervous energy. So, everybody gets the best version of you when you consistently recharge.

You give me empath vibes yet I am specifically being told about the healing arts, in regards to you. Reiki or shamanic healing or maybe even working with herbs to create natural remedies. You intuitively know what people need to feel better. You not only have a healing touch but a healing voice. People are very soothed, just by the way you speak. I can see some of you having a YouTube channel or podcast and getting comments from your subscribers that they listen to you to fall asleep lol. In a good way. I also think you're that person who knows just what to say to others in regards to their problems, in a way that's uncanny. Sometimes, you don't even know how you give such great advice or where it comes from. This could be a sign of claircognizance and/or clairaudience. Sometimes, Spirit just talks directly through you, using you as a messenger.

You definitely could have been drawn to other piles because you have a complex energy. Your abilities are multidimensional, as is your nature. While you are compassionate and loving, you are a ferocious protector of others. (Maybe because you are so compassionate and loving) If and when you become a parent, good luck to anyone who tries to mess with your child! I also think you can feel very protective toward anyone in a very unhealthy relationship, especially if you've been through one yourself. In the latter case, this is a gift because you can be that catalyst someone needs to see their toxic situation with someone else clearly and put in the work to get out of it. In general, you excel at being a soothing yet sobering voice of reason. People can feel absolutely lost until you set them straight or wake them up.

Yet, you also seem to have a playful side that has a much more powerful effect than you realize. You really lift people's spirits. I think your inner child is very active and at the forefront of your personality. This makes you really powerful in this bleak world where people feel pressured to color inside the lines. Because you don't, they feel emboldened to loosen up, have more fun, break some social rules. You could have a major Air influence in your chart, especially Aquarius (but Libra is also coming through). Your influence on others is tremendous and you usually don't even realize you're doing it. You're just boldly living your life and serving as this empowering inspiration to them.

Okay, so something specific is also coming through. I think there is a particular male deity who wants to work with you and he is very insistent about it. Not in a bad way lol. He will just let himself be known! He has a very masculine energy but is also pretty wild or chaotic. He's like a lovable troublemaker or a crazy big brother. Loki is the one coming through the most but I am also getting Dionysus and Apollo. But, take what resonates! If you have felt called by a particular god, then there's your confirmation. I think he is coming through to also tell you that you have some of his energy. You are a lovable troublemaker yourself yet your kindness makes you, at times, hold that back some. But, you are actually at your best when you are letting loose (not to extremes, though). Even if it runs certain people the wrong way, it helps others free themselves, in the long run.

(Side note: the being I just spoke of may not be a deity but just a masculine Spirit Guide with an incredibly strong presence, in general and in your life, who embodies the energy I spoke of. But, it feels like a deity, for most of you, who's very close to you. )

[abibliophobiaa]

Beyond — s.h. x f!reader

Chapter Two: I Think I Wanna Marry You

a/n: here’s chapter two of my purely self-indulgent fun, which shouldn’t be taken very seriously, if at all fic. haha. wanted to play around with one of my favorite tropes, so here we are with modern day!rich!fake husband!steve harrington x afab!reader.

warnings/tags: hugely unedited; mentions of alcohol; parent loss, both parties; r has a sister and father; smut in later chapters, so 18+, minors dni; additional tags to be added.

masterlist

-

-

The move itself brings a second dose of reality you never fully thought through.

Seeing Steve there, with his dark BMW, sunglasses on his face. He’s popped the trunk already and it’s with that sudden clarity you’re reminded that it’s happening.

That this is real and not some dream you’ve imagined in your mind.

You’re marrying him. In four weeks. Thirty days, exactly. A countdown to the next three years of your life. The other half of your “paperwork” you’re going to sign when you scribble your name along that certification of your marriage.

You work in comfortable silence. Robin and Nancy come along too for assistance, and with the combination of efforts, Steve’s car is packed in less than two hours. You’re shocked he’s even bothered to do it himself, and not order some sort of moving company. But when you point that out to him, he only shrugs and says he wanted to help.

Apparently it’s the least he can do for getting a wife at the end of all of this.

That and countless zeros on a check that he doesn’t even need or want.

Once your things are all settled in the trunk and backseat, Robin wanders over to where you both stand on the sidewalk, arms looping tight around your frame. She steps back and moves to tousle Steve’s hair, earning a sharp jerk of his body out of contact and an utterance of complaint from the taller man.

With a snort, she says, “You love me, don’t deny it.”

And he does. You know that much. He’s been closer with Robin for a year or so now. A direct result of her relationship with Nancy. Nancy’s job as a journalist, often documenting his life or the accolades of his family, has established a bond between the three. You try to tamper that slight jealousy.

The fact is that both Robin and Eddie have more insight into the man you’re marrying than you do.

You were always too busy, after all. Working or deep in your own studies and missing out on the many evenings Steve invited them all to join him in his outings. You suppose you’ll rectify that soon. There’s a lot two people can learn in three years—if he’s open to it, that is.

That awareness of truly not knowing him settles in as you clamber into the passenger seat, thumb sliding awkwardly over the band of your engagement ring to fiddle idly. He turns the dial on the music, something pop and current, and you lean back against your seat, letting the quiet of the morning wash over you.

You wake some time later to the sound of Steve’s voice in your ear, announcing, “Hey. We made it.”

Sleep lingers in your eyes as you shift in your seat to take him in. Dark eyes greet yours, sunglasses tucked into the neckline of his shirt. Your gaze then slides to the imposing building on a side of the city you’ve never really ventured outside of your coffee date with him some days prior.

It stands proud, tall and looming, with workers at the ready, prepped with carts for your things.

“They’ll take care of bringing everything up, and I thought maybe we could grab a coffee,” he suggests, moving to open his door. He tosses the valet his key and waltzes over to your side, opening the door for you. “How does that sound?”

You’re suddenly aware of the state of your clothes. Nothing more than a pair of baggy mom jeans and a striped tee shirt. Some white tennis shoes that are veering on brown in some areas from overuse.

Then there’s Steve, in dark wash jeans and a shirt you know likely still cost him a small fortune. Effortlessly handsome as always with a Chanel watch strapped around the wrist extended toward you.

You take his palm, nearl tripping over the bump of the curb as you go, your side thumping against his. He curls you there instead of letting you go, an arm around your shoulder, waving to the workers as they shift and swirl around you.

Keeping up appearances already, you suppose.

One pauses to dip their head your way, beaming brightly, asking, “It’s the girl from Instagram. Congratulations, Miss. Or rather, soon to be Mrs. Harrington.”

The name drops something akin to cool dread in your stomach. But you smile all the same. “You know what they say. When you know—” You tip your head up to look at him, gripping him by the jaw and giving him a soft wiggle. “You know.”

In your palm, Steve forces a grin. A little wild, a little smushed and silly, but the worker smiles all the same and wishes you both a good morning. Leaves you standing beside your soon to be husband on the side of an unfamiliar street, in an unfamiliar new town, ready to walk into your unfamiliar home.

“Coffee sounds good, actually,” you decide, wanting to be anywhere other than stuck in the awkward silence of the moment, and follow him down the sidewalk.

-

By the time you return, Steve’s been alerted that all your things have been brought up to the penthouse. Coffee in hand, you walk through the swirling doors, standing as close to Steve as humanly possible without truly touching him. There are people there to greet him, realizations in the back of your mind that he must be well-known. Amicable and kind, they offer warm welcomes to both you and your future husband as you’re led to an elevator that brings you all the way up to the top floor.

It’s from there, you’re brought into the place you’ll be spending the next few years. But what greets you is far greater than you even imagined. Endless floor to ceiling windows that overlook the cityscape. High, vaulted ceilings, impossibly white walls. Dark furniture throughout the living area, the kitchen. Against the living room wall rests the largest television you’ve seen, presently off, though Steve turns it on to allow some music to play and break the awkward silence as he walks you around.

He’s already told you the general layout of his space: two bathrooms, multiple bedrooms, a fully decked out personal gym, movie area, dining area, outdoor patio, a study that also poses as his office, a library. It seems impossible to have this much space, and yet the further into the suite you walk, the more real it becomes.

“Seems not lived in, though,” you comment out loud, taking in the impressively clean place. Especially knowing Steve doesn’t spend much time at all here. “Like there’s all this space and nothing to fill it with.”

He huffs out a laugh, not disagreeing. “You can spruce it up if you want. I’ll give you my card. Whatever you like to make it feel like yours. Because, well, it is yours.”

“Yours, mine, and ours, right?” You awkwardly laugh, walking over to look out the windows and take in the bustling city below. “It’s amazing.”

“It’s…yeah, you know, I guess it is.” He sidles up next to you, peering out where you are. He frowns, contemplative. “I guess I don’t think about it often. I wake up to it every day.”

Another stark reminder of just how different your lives are.

“How was wedding planning with my mom?” he asks, drawing you attention to his face. His fingers card through his hair, his feet carrying him over to the kitchen to pull out a glass. He adds a second, asking, “Anything to drink?”

“Water is fine,” you say, hands clasped behind your back as you join him. “We went over color schemes. I ended up with pale pinks, lavenders and a tiny pop of gold. More so the accents. We will be looking for a dress tomorrow. Kind of shitting myself over that one.”

“I can come—if you want?” He suggests, holding your glass in front of him.

“Isn’t that bad luck?” you tease, taking a sip.

“Pretty sure that’s only at the wedding.”

“Right.” The wedding. In thirty days. “I mean, if you wanted to come…”

“I’ll be there,” he promises, opening his phone and showing you the calendar app. “What time?”

“Your mother got us a private appointment at twelve. I told her she didn’t have to do that but—”

“She’s excited. She’s getting a daughter out of this. Sometimes I think she wishes I’d been a girl,” he laughs, though there’s a hint of bitterness there you don’t miss. “Here—let me show you your room.”

You trail after him in silence, eyes taking in everything you pass. Boring, empty walls. No pops of color. No personal photos. Nothing indicative of life. Not even a shred of memorabilia from his childhood, or something of sentimental value from his boyhood. It seems odd, though you don’t press him on it. Instead you allow him to bring you through the tour, before stopping in front of a closed door.

“This,” he says, tapping on the exterior, “is my room. In case you ever need me. And here…”

You walk further down the way and stop in front of another door. “Will be your room. All your things will have already been moved in. You just have to unpack and make it yours. I do have some work I need to get to now, but I’m around if you need me.”

“It’s the weekend…” you point out, fingers around the door handle.

“Yeah,” he agrees, pushing his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. “But with all that’s going on, I want to make sure everything is taken care of before the wedding and our honeymoon.”

Honeymoon.

Right.

To that private island in the Maldives.

A honeymoon for two people who are most definitely not intimate and, therefore, should not be spending money like this is anything more than a mere sham.

Still, your flights are booked, accommodations made, and itinerary is set. It was the first thing his mother had done other than figuring out what color palette you preferred.

“So, uh, I’ll talk to you…later then,” you say, shifting awkwardly on the balls of your feet.

“Yeah, later.” He nods.

And suddenly, you’re Cinderella once more.

Standing there in that doorway, in her too-big home, with that pumpkin instead of a carriage.

-

Though you’ve never spent much time fantasizing about shopping for your wedding dress, it never quite looks like what you see around you now.

For starters, you imagined your mother would be there. Kind, bright and smiling. There to tell you how beautiful you look, to coax you through your nerves, to remind you that this is the most special day of your life coming up and to just enjoy the moment.

But it’s not. And you’re left standing on a pedestal in front of Mrs. Harrington, your father, sister, Eddie and Robin. Further off in the distance is Steve, phone against his face as it has been since you woke that morning.

Steve’s always busy, you soon realize. In the private car to take you to the boutique? He had a work conference call. In the kitchen while you ate your breakfast? Another phone call. Now here, while a bridal attendant works with his mother to find you some options to try on? He’s got some major meltdown to help sort out.

You understand, and yet there’s a slight sting there you’re not expecting. The idea that he said he would be there for your try-on session, but he’s not really there. Not emotionally, at least.

“Still can’t believe you got Eddie to come,” Caroline laughs, elbowing the man in question as he snatches her up and shakes her vigorously. “Stop it, asshole—”

“Caroline!” your father snaps, leaning back into the couch cushion as another attendant passes out glasses of champagne for all present.

They even manage to find some juice for your sister, so she feels involved with the process.

“So, we picked a few beautiful pieces. A lot of these are brand new, so you won’t have to worry about someone else wearing the same dress—”

“Oh I’m not concerned about—”

Mrs. Harrington clears her throat, waving her champagne flute in the air. “Only the best for my future daughter in law.”

You shoot a weak grin Robin’s way.

Eddie gives you a reassuring thumbs up, arm still around Caroline’s neck despite her protesting.

The next few hours are a whirlwind of trying on dress after dress. Fancy beading, endless lace, plunging backs, dramatic trains, striking silhouettes.

You’re decked in beading from head to toe, diamond encrusted gowns, gowns that look like they’re better suited for royalty than on the girl who grew up in Hawkins. Who worked at her little hole in the wall restaurant and had a normal, unglamorous upbringing.

It hits you as you’re standing there, with a veil that looks to be studded with expensive jewels, staring at your own reflection that this isn’t you. None of these are. And even if you’re marrying someone to help them fulfill a will and to secure a debt for your own self, there’s a part of you that wants to do things your way.

If you’re going to get married to Steve Harrington, you want to feel like yourself while doing it. “Do you have something more…simple? Classic. Understated, maybe?”

The bridal attendant looks to your future mother-in-law like you have grown five dozen heads, and the look your mother-in-law then gives you tells you she is agreeing with the same sentiment.

Her gaze wavers, shifting over to where her son is pacing in the background, before she shifts back to where you stand on a podium.

The girl in a fancy ball gown that feels like a costume more than anything else.

“What are you thinking, sweetheart?” she asks, and you blow out a heavy breath.

Your guests shift on the couch awkwardly as you hop off the podium and peruse the dozens of racks. You point out the ones that seem more comfortable, more like something you would have picked up on your own even before all of this. Simpler designs, classical silhouettes, subtle beading.

All in all, you end up in a stunning a-line princess, v-neck wedding gown with thin straps and a pretty lace detailing along the low back.

A minimalistic veil is placed at the back of your head and draped around you like a billowing halo, trailing down the pedestal and onto the cream carpeting below.

Behind you, Eddie whistles.

Caroline snaps photos on her phone.

Robin’s shouting, “Holy shit, babe.”

And when you turn around to your father and future mother-in-law, you know you’ve made the right decision in trusting your gut. Both have snatched tissues from a nearby tissue box and dab ceaselessly at their eyes, sniffling audibly.

“You look beautiful, honey,” your father says around a sob.

Bottom lip wobbling, you whisper, “Thank you.”

Mrs. Harrington waves in her son’s direction, calling over her shoulder, “Steve, look at your bride. Stop being rude.”

When he turns around, there’s a moment. A brief one, you think, where he pauses. Maybe it’s a realization he’s making a huge mistake, the understanding that he’s going to have a wife in a few short weeks, the idea that he’s giving up his future for three years. But there’s a thought, however fleeting, where his eyes widen and you wonder if it’s actually none of those at all.

Without a name to place that emotion to, you simply swallow and mutter softly, “Well, what do you think?”

Eddie leans against the couch, fingers draping over the plush back as he asks out loud, “Yeah, Stevie, what do you think?”

It’s a threat.

Veiled.

There’s no danger, not really, but Steve swallows all the same.

Wavers a bit as he looks to Eddie, then back to you.

He swallows again, and says, “You’re beautiful, honey.”

Disappointment sinks like an anchor of dread, because you wonder if he even means it.

-

Cake testing a week later fares no better. You’re still getting used to your new routine. Waking up early to an empty home in an empty room that hardly feels like yours. Steve’s usually off to sort out something with the business, while you’re left to your own devices.

Which means phone calls with the wedding planner, pictures sent back and forth between Steve and your future mother-in-law about decisions made, which Steve always just sends and thumbs up emoji back to, and trying to make sense of a wedding that only one half of the couple has been privy to.

Sure, he’d been there when you picked out your dress. But he hadn’t been for the floral arrangements, for figuring out what the bridesmaids will wear as well as the groomsmen. And he’s definitely not there when you’re presented with options for musical entertainment.

So it comes as a shock when he does end up coming for the cake testing. And since he’s free to do so, his mother stays home, suggesting it’ll be an intimate moment for you two. Something about how the cake is important.

You hold back your biting remarks about how it’s just a cake, and instead thank her.

Whine a bit on the phone to really sell the fact that you ‘miss Stevie’—in case she doubts the validity of your engagement. She’s not really shown any indications of such, but you’re growing more mindful of the importance of appearances.

Because it’s in that first week your name pops up in the popular pages of instagram and other social media platforms. There’s even a TikTok of you walking on a busy city street with Steve and Eddie, where people bring to question if you and Steve are already fighting based on your body language.

Though, you do suppose there’s some weight to their remarks. In said video, you’re standing closer to Eddie than Steve, and Steve’s phone is in the hand nearest to you. The one they suggest he should really be holding if he’s as in love as he is. It sounds ridiculous, but it does make sense.

In their eyes, you’re more likely to be dating the famous rockstar based on body language alone than your fiancé.

Wedding planning should be butterflies in your belly, heart eyes for days, wrapped up in one another sort of affection. Steve and you, on the other hand, are two people walking side by side and yet not together.

You understand you need to change that. So as you walk down the street that evening on your way to the bakery, you mutter out, “Hold my hand.”

“What?” He’s typing on his phone, as always. The sound of keyboard clicking meets your ears, before he locks the screen and slides it into his pocket.

“Hold,” you say. There’s a little extra bite this time, “my hand.”

He exhales. “Why?”

“Because you’re in love with me and we’re getting married in less than twenty days,” you remind him.

Less than three weeks. Just under that, really. A thought that immediately has your skin prickling with nervousness and anticipation. Three weeks until you have a new name, a new husband.

“And we’re on our way to our cake testing,” you add, lacing your fingers through his. “People have been talking about us on social media.”

“Saying what?” He leads you down a side street, and then another.

“That we look uncomfortable with one another. That it seems like we must be fighting, because you don’t show me any affection in public—”

“I’ve been—”

“Busy, I know. But they don’t know that, so they’ll fill in the blanks when applicable,” you explain, giving his palm a light squeeze. “So I think we should get used to the public displays of affection, don’t you? I mean, we’re going to have to kiss at the altar, for one. And then there’s the dancing at the reception. Photos. Events.”

“I guess you’re right,” he agrees.

“I know I’m right,” you joke, allowing him to open the door for you to the building.

-

“Cake testing can be intimate. This is one of your first meals as a couple, so it needs to be representative of your relationship. The two of you. The love you share,” the cake maker explains, her hands waving to and fro in the air like she’s painting a picture.

You glance over at Steve. He offers a shrug, likely just as uncertain as to what the hell this lady is getting at. “Pardon?”

“You want a cake that is representative of your love. A symbol—if you will.”

“It’s just a c—” Steve begins, but the older woman narrows her gaze darkly and he clears his throat. Uncomfortable. “Honey, why don’t you handle this one?”

“Oh, but darling, you’re the cake connoisseur.” You pat the hand holding yours affectionately atop the table, forcing a megawatt grin on your lips.

“Is that so?” Madeleine asks, cat eye glasses sliding lower down the bridge of her nose. “In that case, did you have any ideas for what you imagined the cake at your wedding to look like?”

Steve’s hand nervously grows tighter around yours. You hiss at the throbbing pain that develops there when your knuckles smash together. The grasp immediately loosens, a thumb coming to slide gently over the sore areas.

You choose to ignore the rush of heat that swoops low in your belly, though.

“Well—I pictured…a cake,” he expresses lamely.

“What my dear fiancé means to say is…we’ve been so caught up with the rush of wedding planning we haven’t given it much thought,” you giggly airily, faux coyness filling your tone. “You know how it is. We’re just so excited to spend the rest of our lives together. So we were hoping maybe you’d be able to suggest some options for us.”

Because you’re also not sure how to tell them your cake needs to be representative of a mix of high levels of shame and “I was drowning in debt and Steve offered assistance, so long as I become his wife.”

Madeleine huffs and gets to work.

Later, the two of you stumble back onto the street with a cake picked out and designed to Madeleine’s liking. A red velvet center with some endless swirling flowers along the exterior in the color scheme of your wedding.

“A cake reflective of our relationship,” he mutters, shaking his head as he reaches for your palm once more. “And what was that? Sacrificing me to her?”

You bat your eyelashes prettily, shrugging. “My idea of a cake is a boxed Pillsbury one. I figured you were the closest to an expert we would get. Also—you nearly broke my hand there.”

“I was stressed,” he argues, though there’s a hint of a smile curling his lips. His thumb does another one of those low sweeps that has you pausing in your footsteps. “But that was a little ridiculous, wasn’t it?”

You bark out a laugh, following him down the still unfamiliar streets leading home. “A little? I don’t know where your mother and the wedding planner found her. It’s a cake. It’s literally a cake we’re going to have one bite of before the caterers feed it to the rest of our guests.” A shudder ripples down your spine at that. “Our guests. Weird to think, huh?”

“Less than three weeks,” he muses, the two of you crossing at a streetlight. “Still feeling okay with the whole thing?”

“Okay? That's still to be determined.” He waves to someone in passing. Likely a neighbor, you assume. “Backing out? Absolutely not.”

-

One thing you definitely didn’t consider in this whole…fake marriage plot with Steve, is the concept of bachelor and bachelorette parties. You are obviously well aware of the typical fanfare, have been in numerous weddings as it is, but there are no parameters or guidelines in place for a wedding that has been planned in thirty days in an effort to rush to the altar.

So, you leave that part of the wedding planning up to your friends.

And somehow the end result is a joint party.

What could possibly go wrong?

“Holy shit, Steve.” Robin’s head falls back as she enters your bedroom, mouth dropping open, taking it all in. It’s the size of both your rooms combined back at your old place. “At least you got a nice place out of all this.”

You shrug, dropping down onto your bed. Fingers splay across the sheets, soft and cool beneath. Against your closet rests the white jumpsuit you’ve decided on for your party. A sleeveless number that cinches at the waist and a sweetheart neckline that cups your breasts sumptuously.

Pretty.

But there’s the dawning realization that tonight all the attention will be solely on you and Steve.

So what do you do?

-

“This is a terrible idea,” Steve groans, wincing as his shot goes down.

“Actually, it’s probably one of the best I’ve had,” Eddie exclaims, clapping you both on the back.

The sting of tequila burns in your nose. The flowing sash across your chest that says Mrs. Harrington rumples when your arm reaches over to place the glass back down on the countertop. Robin’s there to adjust it, grinning despite your sour expression.

“Wow, look at you two,” she coos, pulling out her phone to snap a photo. “For your story. They’ll eat it up. Plus, better to get all the cute pictures now, instead of when you’re both drunk later.”

Steve pulls you closer to take a photo, grumbling. “We are not getting drunk.”

-

“Steeeeve.”

You’re drunk.

“Yeah, honey bunny.”

Aaaaand so is he.

“F—” You hiccup. He laughs, leaning bodily into your shoulder. “—uck. I’m gonna kill Eddie.”

Even though Eddie’s only responsible for your first drink. Not the second, or the third, fourth…you’re not sure where you’re at now.

There’s at least an awareness that it’s enough; enough to have the room spinning when you sit down, and Steve beside you like an anchor in a shaky sea.

So when he moves to stand, your fingers curl around his wrist and drag him back down again. “No. Don’t go. We’re…to death do us part.”

“Till,” he corrects, snorting playfully. “You’re gonna see me everyday for…three years.”

“But there’s so many people here. Soooo many. And most of them are your friends,” you whine, clasping your hand in his as he leads you back out further into the people spread out along the private rooftop. “You have soooo many friends. Did you know that?”

He simply laughs, just as Eddie’s voice breaks over the noise all around you. A loud shout of, “The soon to be newlyweds should do the next round of karaoke!”

“Edward Munson, you little s—” Another hiccup. Shit, you think, we’re giggly drunk tonight. “shit. I’m gonna beat your ass like I did when we were kids.”

“It’s like something out of a fuckin’ romcom,” Steve later whines as you’re both pushed onto the stage by a bunch of cheering friends. “And they picked our song already.”

“Oh no, which one?” You slur a bit on your words, one ankle rolling like a baby deer.

Steve grasps your bicep to steady you. “Marry You by Bruno Mars.”

“Nooo,” you moan, hiding your face in his collar bone. Shit, you think, I’m a flirty drunk tonight too. “Think we can escape our own party?”

One glance out to your awaiting guests tells you that’s not at all a possibility. Steve’s there, overly affectionate now that you’ve got a crowd, with a hand on your lower back, pulling you close.

To anyone else, you’re a couple celebrating their nuptials in the next few days.

To you, you know he’s laying it on thick.

Making sure there is absolutely no question as to the validity of your marriage.

Especially with potential co workers around, with those who can easily talk rumors in the halls, who might wonder why the speedy engagement and rush down the aisle in the first place.

“One song,” you shout over the crowd, over Steve’s shoulder.

And then, in a puff of breath against his ear you whisper, “Make it count, hubby.”

-

“It’s a beautiful night. We’re looking for something dumb to do. Heyy babyyyy! I think I wanna marry you!” You sing.

If you can consider it that.

To Eddie it’s screeching or a shrill wail, a high pitched thing that makes everyone around you wince.

There’s interference with the mic that has Eddie’s eyes slamming shut against the sharp pang against his eardrums.

“Think we should stop them?” Robin asks out loud, watching Steve awkwardly bob and sway beside you, never really sure of what to do with his body when it comes to music.

“No,” Eddie chuckles darkly, leaning back on his chair. “Those idiots are involving us in a literal crime, so we’re going to have our fun with it.”

“Is it the look in your eyes or is it this dancing juice? Who cares, baby, I think I wanna marry you,” Steve continues, and it’s clearly not up to your standard, because you grab his arm and wiggle it frantically.

“I am marrying him!” You giggle over the microphone, extending your ring to the crowd. “Can you believe it? Mrs. Harrington.”

“Oh no,” Robin mutters, gripping Nancy’s hand beside her. “She’s giggly now.”

“She’s fucked up. She’s going to kill us in the morning,” Eddie grumbles.

Robin’s eyes widen as Nancy says, “I really feel like you two should stop them. Because Steve just grabbed her and now they’re, uh, making out on the stage—”

Robin jumps to her feet. “Oh fuck.”

-

You wake in the morning to a bunch of tiny needles stabbing your skull. Like someone took a jackhammer to your brain and pushed an on switch.

Brain practically groaning in your head, you lift yourself slowly into a sitting position and moan at the throb that rolls down the nape of your neck and down your spine.

Wincing, you kick your legs over the side of the bed and insert your feet into the slippers on the floor down below, sighing at the immediate comfort.

The penthouse is full of chatter. Voices mill from the kitchen, soft despite the clanging cymbals you’re convinced are in your brain. And there, at the kitchen island, stands none other than your two (ex) best friends and your soon to be husband, cups of coffee held against their temples, shame ebbing from their forms.

“Good morning, beautiful,” Robin coos, turning around to gauge your expression.

You don’t miss the shock of brows curling high on her forehead, nor do you miss the tick in Eddie’s cheek as he fights a smile.

“I must look like shit,” you grumble, sliding into the kitchen between the group, uncaring as your shoulder brushes Steve’s. There’s already an iced coffee for you on the countertop. Steve must have ordered, you assume, fighting the flutter in your chest at the thought. “I feel like shit. Very unsexy shit. People keep talking about my bridal beauty, but I feel very much like a bridal beast right now.”

Robin shakes her head, hand on your shoulder. “No, you look fine, you look—”

“Like you’ve had better nights,” Eddie says nonchalantly, earning a cough from Steve to his left.

“I’m sorry, it seems like your invitation to my wedding was rescinded. So weird,” you say brightly, leaning against Robin’s shoulder, pinching your eyes against the bright kitchen lightning. “You’re no longer my best friend. Maybe you’ll fare better with Steve here.”

Why did Steve get a building with white walls as far as the eye can see? You also decide your first purchase will be curtains to block out the natural light coming through the large windows covering the entirety of your living room exterior.

“Tell me you guys didn’t have fun,” Eddie says with a roll of his eyes. “Unless you don’t remember much of it. But it looked like you were having fun.”

The thing is, you remembered every moment.

Every interaction with your guests, every brush of shoulders from your soon to be husband.

Every fleeting glance.

Every look over the top of your glass.

The way your heart danced in your chest as he led you onto that stage.

How his fingers had curled around your own as you sang that ridiculous karaoke song.

How his lips had felt when he dropped a hand to the small of your back and tugged you flush against his form.

The way his heart thundered against yours where your sternums pressed together.

The warmth of his palm.

The heat of his breath as you breathed one another in.

The fullness of his mouth against yours, gentle brushes at first that soon grew passionate.

Heated.

It had been scalding.

A burn that simmered.

A burn you relished, wanted to fan into flame, wanted to foster in the moment.

Just a silly, stupid, alcohol-fueled moment.

It means nothing.

Nothing.

“I don’t really remember much after we left here,” Steve says.

He stares at you. Eyes locked on your face. Imploring.

Eddie and Robin shift your way, too.

Curiosity brims, and your heart aches.

You open your mouth. “I don’t really remember much either.”

Seven days.

You’ll be a wife in seven days.

Don’t get it twisted now, you remind yourself.

-

-

[archivecon]

Statement begins...

Statement of ArCon staff, regarding the third annual ArchiveCon convention for fans of Rusty Quill’s The Magnus Archives/The Magnus Protocmagprool. Statement recorded 23/02/09 by the Official ArchiveCon Tumblr.

—

Hey archival assistants, avatars, and everyone in between!

Welcome to the official Tumblr for ArchiveCon 2024. We are proud to be hosting our THIRD (!!) ArchiveCon - a fan-lead, fan-run online mini convention for 18+ fans of the Rusty Quill horror podcast, The Magnus Archives (and now Protocol!)

Whether you are an old fan, a new fan, a deeply-rooted fandom denizen, or looking to make your first connections in our fan community, we hope you’ll join us. ArchiveCon may be online-only, but we’ve got all the energy and features of a traditional offline convention - everything from panels and special guests (voice actors, writers, and industry professionals!), to cosplay and games, streaming and discussion, and even an Artist’s Alley.  

Here’s the quick rundown:

- June 21-23, 2023 (that’s three days, folks - Friday to Sunday!)

- 18+, online only (Most areas of the con will be SFW, but you still must be 18+ to attend)

- FREE TO ATTEND! (Registration is required and must be done so before the convention starts; you can register here!)

- All events scheduled in PST, but all international fans are welcome and most panels (at the discretion of individual panelists) will be recorded for post-convention, on-demand viewing.  

- Primarily focused on The Magnus Archives/Protocol, but fans of all things horror, podcasting, and transformative works will find something to love. The Plain Old Curious are always welcome, too - we have to feed The Eye somehow, right? ;)

For more detailed information and FAQs, visit our website!

—

Are you an artist? A storyteller? A connoisseur of pulp fiction novels looking for an audience? ArchiveCon is here for you, beyond attendee registration. :)

Artists and artisans of all kinds are welcome (encouraged!) to apply for a slot in our Artists’ Alley. Do you take digital art commissions? Make soap? Knit hats?  All of the above?? (Kudos to you, you must be using superhuman eldritch powers to get all that done.) We’d love to give you a place to showcase and sell your work, reach a like-minded audience, and network with fellow creatives. 

Don’t have anything to sell, but want to share your passion for the world of The Magnus Archives and its fans? Then we’d love to chat with you about hosting a panel. ArchiveCon will host panels on a wide variety of subjects including (but not necessarily limited to!): 

- deep dives and meta on TMA/TMP characters, plot points, history, and relationships (we love a detailed ship manifesto)

- queer identities in horror and fandom spaces

- the evolution/history of fandom culture

- fan creations and transformative works (such as zines, art, fic and fic-binding, cosplay - you name it)

- friendly discussions and debates

- technical tutorials and discussions on podcast production, streaming, sound editing, etc!

For more insight and ideas, check out last year’s program schedule!

Applications aren’t open quite yet, but we’ll update all our pages when they are.  Hope to see you there!

[Statement Ends.]

[beautifulfuckup99]

Request is simple

Alpha JK * Chubby Girl 🫠

Babes, you know I got you! Gonna make this a bit of a part 2 to "I Can Handle It", which has reached 390 hearts so far. I'm so glad ya'll enjoyed it! Lol

Title: A Little Reminder...

Warning(s): SMUT! (Obviously), Body image issues, pregnancy S!X, And, yes, fluff too! Lol

Author's Note: This is for my beautiful Big/Curvy Girls. Love ya'll!

***************************************

Jungkook's POV:

My phone rang out as I waited for the light to turn green. I looked down at my phone expecting to see my wife calling, but it wasn't her number. I picked up the call and put the phone on speaker so I could talk without getting a ticket for it.

"Hello?" I asked and quickly heard a sigh of relief come from the other side.

"Finally. What the hell are you doing out there?" Namjoon's deep voice came out in an angry tone, and I fought the urge to roll my eyes at the conversation I know he'll be having with me soon. Even on hiatuses, he was still my Hyung...

"Joon please, I have enough people mad at me for tonight." I muttered softly, hoping for some mercy after the week I've been dragged through.

"Well, someone's gotta figure out where your damn head is at. Y/N says you're cheating on her?" He asks and I want to yell out. 'I'M NOT CHEATING!', but I hold in the frustration. Married. Married, living together, and expecting our first child, and Y/N's insecurities had found a way right back to us.

"She called me crying after you walked out tonight? Didn't I teach you to never leave just leave a fight unresolved?" He lectures and I hit my forehead on the steering wheel before looking back at the road as I drive around the city streets of Soeul. "She said you never touch her and that-" I finally cut Namjoon off from his worried rant.

"I know what she said! I hear it all the damn time. That's why I left. I'm sick and tired of her always accusing me of looking at different women when we're out together or saying that she's not attractive anymore. She's having my child, Joon! We're married for crying out loud! What more should I do to prove I'm not going anywhere?" I asked in pure exhaustion. I'd even taken this break for her, and it seems like nothing was working. This was honestly worse than when we were dating. I hear my Hyung sigh before he begins speaking again.

"You need to understand that she's very sensitive right now, Jungkook. Any and every little thing will find a way to set her off. Especially since you guys haven't been doing much-" I cut him off again.

"That's none of your business." I say fast and then pause. "I-I'm sorry, Joon..." I sigh, just angry that Y/N would even tell him all of this. He hums.

"Jungkook. Y/N said that she believes the reason you won't touch her is because you think she's getting fat." He says, and I huff in annoyance as I stop at another red light.

"Joon..." I whispered while shaking my head. "I still, and will always, look at Y/N like I did the night we met. I've told her how much I love her body!" I try and defend. Namjoon hums again.

"But her body has changed, Jungkook." He points out. "Have you given her a reminder?" He asks and I nod my head before realizing that he can't see me.

"Not a day has gone by where I didn't tell her that..." I stated before remembering the last few weeks. "I... Well, I mean... Work has been busy lately... And... Shit!" I groaned as I hit my head on the steering wheel again before quickly focusing back on the road.

"'Shit' is right." Namjoon sighs. "You know what you've gotta do now right?" He asks and I stay silent, secretly needing this advice. Even as a grown man with a kid on the way, I knew I'll always need the insight of my Hyung.

"You gotta go home and remind your wife why you wanted a ring on that finger." He stats and I chuckle softly before sighing and pulling over on some random street.

"You're right. I gotta go. Thanks, Hyung." I mumbled and heard Namjoon say a small 'goodnight' and also 'good luck' before hanging up.

I had to make this up to my wife, and fast.

**************************************

I get home just as the clock shows 2:30am, but I'm not tired at all. I close the door behind me and hear the stairs creak a bit as someone comes downstairs. Turning around, I see my beautiful wife standing at the bottom of the staircase, hands crossed over her chest as she bit the corner of her bottom lip as if waiting for the right words to come to mind... So was I.

I had everything I was gonna say ready in the back of my mind, yet now, seeing her there with her hair a mess, her cute little nose red, and her gorgeous eyes puffy, all from crying... I just felt shame for even putting her through this.

"Baby..." I begin as I started walking over to her, flowers in hand, her favorite. "I am so sorry for everything-" She cuts me off with a shake of her head.

"No... I-It's my fault." She states. "I should've known that you would never cheat on me and I'm sorry I accused you. I-It's just everyone talking about you having 'so much chemistry' with that actress in your new music video... I-I guess I just kinda... Kinda lost it." She whispers with her head going down in shame.

I open my mouth to speak again but my voice gets caught in my throat. What good are words at a point like this? I walk over to my wife and grab her chin, tilting her head up to look at me. "I want you Y/N..." I whisper as I look her in the eyes. She pauses and I grab her by the waist, pulling her against me, her curves working as amazing place holders for my arms.

"You don't have to-" I cut her off by picking her up bridal style so I could take her up the stairs to our bedroom.

"I thought I told you back when we were dating. I can handle you just fine. I think you need a little reminder." I whisper in her ear.

As soon as we get through the doorway of the bedroom, I pinned her up against the first wall I could. I didn't mean to be rough with her, but it's been so long since we've even made out... Lust clouded my mind when she moaned into the kiss because of the sting my hand had just left on her plump ass. I kissed her, my tongue shooting into her mouth so I could taste her for the first-time in... I don't know how long.

I pushed her up against the wall harder as my hands reached down to her legs so she could get the hint to jump up and wrap them around me. My hands went to the hem of my shirt she'd been wearing, basically ripping it off of her. I moved away to get a better look at her and moaned. She was wearing red lace. "You were prepared." I pant and she blushes. "I don't know what you're talking about..." She taunts quietly. I put her down to get a better view of her and her body.

Her gorgeous body...

With a spin of my index finger, I motioned for her to turn for me. She slowly and hesitantly did. She turned her back towards me and I slowly grabbed her hips and squeezed. Fuck, I love this view the most...

"I'd be insane to get tired of a body like this." I whisper in her ear, causing her to turn to look at me from over her shoulder. Her bright eyes made my heart flutter like always.

"You mean that?" She whispers softly, as if challenging my sweet words. Our relationship was always a tug of war, and I loved it. She always kept me on my toes, kept me sharp. I smile before cupping her face, the pad of my thumb stroking her cheek.

"With every fiber in my being." I whisper back before leaning in to kiss her, this time more slowly. Our lips move like butter on a hot pan, the motion is slow and consistent, her tongue licking at my lower lip makes me shiver. I pull away from her lips though as my hands pull her closer to my body.

"How did I get so lucky?" I ask as I eye her, and Y/N blushes slightly, thrusting her butt against me to bump me away a bit before turning fully towards me.

"You make it sound like I'm some goddess..." She tries to taunt but I notice how little sarcasm is in her voice, like now she truly believes that she isn't. It makes an anger spark inside me that is quickly replaced with a need to make her believe me.

"Y/N..." I whisper as I make her look at me. "You are a goddess." I state.

"No, I'm not..." She begins, but I lean in and kiss her again. She puts her hands on my shoulders to probably push me back, but I know what she likes. My lips wrap around her bottom lip to suck on softly, my arms wrapping around her waist to hold her as close as her stomach would let me.

As we make out, my hands move to grip her ass, loving the feel of it in my hands. I loved the feel of her cellulite, the stretch marks, how soft it felt when I squeezed. Like dough. I especially loved the noise it made when I...

Smack!

Y/n gasps against my mouth as I rub the ass cheek I'd just smacked. "Get on the bed. I fucking missed this body." I whisper, tonguing my lip ring as I eye her bashful state. She was always so cute...

"Jungkook-" I cut her off.

"Don't 'Jungkook' me. This is what you wanted, right? Why you've been so fussy? It's cause I haven't been giving it to you lately. I'm gonna make up for that right now." I say as I grab her chin firmly, loving how she breathes unevenly at the promise. "Now get on the fucking bed." I order, not in a mood to repeat myself. Not when all I wanted was her withering under me...

Y/N is quick to get on the bed and I drop my jacket finally before walking over while undoing my belt. I yank it off and use it on her wrists, not needing her hands wondering. "Let me take care of this body." I smirk as my hands roam her half naked body now.

I grope her breasts as she gently moans and it's music to my ears. I kiss the tops of her breasts as I squeeze them. Her back aches so I can reach behind her and take her bra off. I slip her bra off of her perfect body and take time to really look at her again. Her hair's a mess, her cheeks are flushed, and she's never looked better. 

"I am so fucking lucky." I begin. "I get to wake up next to you every morning," I kiss the middle of her chest. "Come home to you every afternoon," I kiss down her stomach. "And make love to you every night. I'm in heaven..." I whispered softly before I pull her underwear all the way off and throw it over my shoulder, not caring where it lands. I spread her legs and get comfy between them.

I focus on her inner thighs, wanting to mark them up, biting and leaving hickeys on her perfect skin. "P-Please... Kookie, please!" Y/N begs in need, and it makes me smirk. Being pregnant made her more sensitive. She was practically leaking on the bed already. My breath brushes over her soaked pussy as I tease her more.

"You want it? Hm?" I taunt quietly as she shivers. I smirk and move to face her. "You know what I wanna hear." I say.

"I-I'm a pretty girl..." She whimpers softly. "Please. Please give it to me..." She whines softly. I hum and cup her pussy in one hand, rubbing my palm against her clit. It makes her moan louder and makes me smirk.

"Fuck, you're so wet, I can hear it..." I say happily as I slide two fingers into her at once cause I know she can take it. And she does. She always takes my fingers so easily. Almost as easy as she takes my cock...

"Oh my god..." She whines as her hips hump against my hand. I move to lay next to her as I focus on finger fucking her, eyes almost rolling every time her walls milked my fingers.

"Look at me. Look at me." I order between pants, and her eyes are half shut as she does, forcing herself to stay focused and not lose it to the pleasure yet. "My pretty girl. You like it?" I whisper against her lips, her hands moving against the belt tied around her wrists.

"Yes! Yes! Please, faster. Please, I love-" I cut her off by adding a third finger and rapidly thrusting them in and out, making her head roll back, and I wasn't letting up. The gushing sound coming from her pussy as I finger fucked her was egging me on too much to let up.

"Baby! Baby!" She gasps in pleasure, hips halting as I get to her sweet spot. I relentlessly hit that spot, over and over again as she says my name and my ego grows. I always thought hearing my name from ARMY was music to my ears, but having my wife chant it as I hold her shaking body with my fingers buried deep inside her? It was just a better use of my name...

"Take me baby... Please. Please, fuck me." She whimpers and I feel completely lightheaded at her pleas. I pull my fingers out, making her groan at the loss.

"Don't worry, baby. I'm gonna give you something much bigger." I assure in her ear, making her squeal. I roll her on to her side with me behind her.

"My hands! Please!" She pants as I kiss and bite along her neck. I groan softly and kiss her ear before releasing her wrists. My hands roam her body before I finally undo my jeans that were acting as a prison for my cock. I moan at the relief of my bulge finally being free from it's trap.

Her hand is on my cock before I can even guide it between her legs myself. I smirk as I watch her eyes stay glued to the mirror by our bed. "You know exactly where to look. Good girl..." I praise as I help push into her.

She sucks in some air fast and I grab her leg to hold over my hip so I can push in deeper. "Fuck..." I groan as I feel my cock instantly become surrounded by her warm and wet walls that squeeze around my length in need. "Treat my cock so good, baby..." I pant.

"Give me..." She whines and it makes me smirk. So needy...

I start fucking her faster and her hand goes to mine that's around her waist. Her nails dig into my arm and the burn of her nails going up my forearm only makes me thrust faster. "Oh... Fuck, baby!" I groaned as I move my hips so I can find her sweet spot.

"Jungkook!" She moans out loudly and I smirk. Found it.

Y/N throws her head back, her hair everywhere and her chest moving rapidly up and down. My head moves to the cork of her neck so naturally. This was so natural. I could never experience this with anyone else. And if I had to fuck her speechless to get it through her head that she was my one and only, then so be it.

"So perfect..." I breathed out against her ear as I watch het through the mirror before slowing down. I wanted her to feel every fucking inch of my cock. I wanted to feel just how tight her walls wrap around my cock with need to keep me in.

"Look at me." I whispered and grab Y/N by her chin before she can move, making her whimper loudly. She locks eyes with me.

"Please. Please, fuck me. I have to cum..." She shivers and I smirk as I move my forehead, so it's pressed to hers. She gasps loudly as I give her hard and slow thrusts.

"You are so perfect." I breathed out and she just whispers my name shakily. I smile at her reaction, eyes rolling shut and mouth dropping open. My firm hand moves to her clit to rub it. The look on her face was one of pure need. Pure beauty...

"I love you. I love your body. I love your mind, baby. Fuck..." I pant. "I fucking love everything about you..." I ramble on as she blushes more, whining how much she loves me.

"Kookie... I... Oh god... H-Harder... I-I love you! Please, baby, harder." Y/N cries out, and I move harder. Her hand moves down to hold mine that's rubbing at her clit faster now. I kiss along her face as she trembles.

"Let go, baby." I breathe out. "Come on, beautiful... Cum for me." I continue and Y/N presses her lips against mine hard, but she barely kisses me, too lost in pleasure. I don't mind though. I swallow all of her moans as she cums hard, her whole body shaking as she throws her head back against my shoulder blade, breaking our kiss. I continue through her orgasm and after a few more thrusts, I cum just as hard inside of her.

We don't move after such an intense session. The silence in the room is loud as we try to catch our breaths. I do, however, spend time kissing all over her face, neck, and shoulder as she softly begins giggling, something she does when fully satisfied, and it's always enough to make me fall all over again.

"I love you." The voice is weak and shaky, but it belongs to the woman I love. So, it's perfect...

"I love you too, baby." I say back, my voice hoarse. I slowly move out of her, making her gasp softly at the loss. I pull her into my side to cuddle.

"I'm sorry. For being a handful." She mutters quietly and I chuckle softly.

"Don't be. I'll always be ready to remind you just how amazing you are. I can handle you, baby. Never forget it." I smirk before kissing her tenderly.

**************************************

Also, can we talk about the fact that I've reached 300 followers! Love you all!

[gabessquishytum]

Interior decorator Hob ask has infiltrated my mind BUT with a bit of a twist:

Whether or not he still stumbles his way into the business, he's found he really enjoys it. He enjoys it even more when he settles into a more niche corner of the market as a sex dungeon designer. He's built things from subtle changes for extra bedroom activities to full-on, intense dungeons. And with thr riche clientele thay he works with, there's little he hasn't seen.

Enter Dream: professional Dom who recently moved house and needs to renovate the basement for work. He'd normally do it himself but just shortly after moving, he injured himself to the point that his doctor told him to take it easy for the next few weeks (which would be fine if he didn't have set appointments starting right in a few weeks as well. That doesn't leave enough time to get his workplace situated). So he hired Hob, someone Desire had recommended.

Hob has seen lots of pretty people in his line of work but there's just something about this man that makes Hob want to fall to his knees for (and maybe test out his handiwork with later). He tries to stay professional throughout the process, but there's only so much willpower and Dream sauntering through the house without a shirt and low-rise pants after a shower does nothing to help. Nor does his face looming over Hob's shoulders to examine the plans nor that deep, velvet like voice giving strict instructions on what to fix just beside his ear.

Dream, after seeing Hob for the first time, knew he needed that man. So he's made it his personal mission to wear Hob down and give in like he knows Hob wants to.

After the renovations are complete and Dream is cleared for strenuous activities again, let's just say that freshly made dungeon is going to get plenty of use in-between Dream's appointments.

SEX DUNGEON DESIGNER HOB AKAJSJAJAHSN <3333 unsurprisingly I love it.

Hob is definitely on the submissive end of the spectrum, which is something he uses to his advantage in his work. His designs are more geared towards the needs, comfort and ease of the submissive partner. Other designers may tend to see things from the dom's pov, which is absolutely fine too! But Hob just has an insight into what it actually feels like to be vulnerable and trying to enter a submissive state. His designs have been quite popular with professional doms (Desire may or may not be in the industry just like their brother, and recommended Hob’s work very highly).

It's difficult to work around Dream. Not because he's rude or difficult. But because he can so easily render Hob weak at the knees with his voice or the merest hint of a smile. Hob can't stop fantasising about using every item in the new sex dungeon with Dream, and while he's following the client's strict stipulations, he also finds himself adding elements that he really wants Dream to use on him. Like, the breeding bench with the built-in spreader bar was a particularly vivid part of Hob’s daydreams, and now the real thing takes up a corner of the dungeon space.

When he finally finds himself spread out on the bench with four of Dream’s graceful fingers plunging in and out of his hole, Hob is pleased that he ordered extra cushioning for the part of the bench where his head rests. But mostly he's just whimpering and begging for more, because he's a good slut - Dream knew that he would be, the moment he walked through the door.

It's only fair that Hob gets to use the room he put such energy and devotion into. And after Dream spent the whole renovation time teasing and working Hob into a proper state, it's high time for him to make this poor sweet sub cum!

[kali-chaotic-neutral]

Advice

Pick a cat and get some much needed advice

This will include:

~Advice you might need ~Something you have to hear ~Insight on something

Disclaimer: this is just for entertainment purposes, and as a pick-a-card reading it may not resonate for everyone. Take what you resonate with, leave what you don't.

Please do not hesitate to suggest a few PAC reading topics as I am struggling with these type of posts.

Cat 1:

I feel as though you may be in a sort of identity crisis. Maybe you're going through a time of major change, and it is causing some crisis of sorts. You're worldview has been shaken and you're brain chemistry has been altered dramatically. Additionally, this could be some drastic change in your spirituality or maybe you're leaving a religion for another or just leaving religion entirely and being hounded by your community for doing so. I know it's stressful, I know you're probably extremely critical of yourself, picking and panicking over every little mistake you make. I want you to take a deep breath and know that this isn't the end of the world. Take the energy you use to criticise yourself to maybe journal, do some shadow work or gratitude journalling. You don't have to write paragraphs after paragraphs. Even one bullet point can make a difference. Let out your thoughts on paper so you don't end up blowing up on someone. and regretting it. Let it out, clear your head and do some damage control before evaluating what steps you have to take to get yourself out of this pit.

Try to reconnect with your inner child, let that child within you have their moment. Do something simple and childish, colour a book, draw. Do something you've always wanted to do, surround yourself with people you love and your friends, let them help you. Trust that those who care about you have your back. Do not let this temporary setback make you lose sight of what you want. This stressful and dark time you are going through is coming to an end. The only reason this moment seems endless to you, is because it is YOU that is unintentionally dragging this moment. Maybe you're stretching on an argument, or clinging onto a grudge, or just simply holding onto bad habits. You are hurting yourself at this point, and there is no one else to blame but yourself. Accept this pain, let go of this grudge or actually try to stop repeating bad habits. And it's not easy. I have a smoking habit myself, but I am taking steps. I haven't smoked for a month now and it has taken too many failed attempts for me to get here. Do not prolong this situation, because when you fall it will hurt even more. Try stepping out of your comfort zone, baby steps is perfectly fine. For me, getting out of my comfort zone meant wearing more form fitting outfits. I started with crop tops and a jacket over, then moved onto just crop tops and jeans. Then only recently have I gotten the confidence to get out of the house in flared leggings. Very simple, yet so effective in telling you: "Hey, it's okay. See, You're fine. You look so beautiful when you're confidently wearing what you want.". Everyone's journey is different, take your time, but taking the steps is what matters.

Cat 2:

There is someone (or was someone) in your life that absolutely changed your life for the best, someone that was there for you in your hardest time. You might be feeling a bit guilty in the sense that they are always there for you, that whatever you give them (or want to give them) seems inadequate, or maybe this person is not in your life anymore and you feel guilt for not expressing your gratitude while they were there. The guilt is weighing you down, and might be leading to insecurities as well. Just know that even a simple acknowledgement and thanks is a gift, while not the most extravagant, it does hold meaning. Open your heart, let them know how grateful you are. And if you struggle with this, a small simple, meaningful gift will always send the message. A gift is a gift, it's the thought that matters. Let this person know, that you appreciate them for more than the comfort they bring you. And if they aren't in your life anymore and it feels like it's too late, it can be as simple as a journal entry addressed to this person. Pour out your heart and write the letter as though you would send it to them if they were present. Or maybe you went through a rocky split up (romantic, platonic) and you want to reach out but you're unsure whether or not you should. Give it a shot. If the other person doesn't respond or responds very harshly, let it go. At least you tried. Or maybe things just fell apart. Me and a few of my high school friends went to different colleges and just stopped chatting with each other. And even now, it's so awkward to try and chat with them, but also so awkward to unfollow them.

Take some time off if you can, maybe during a special occasion. If you're celebrating something with this person, let it be more intimate. Maybe with close friends/family or even just you and this person. Make time for this person, like they do for you. Or maybe it's a day that reminds you of them, honour them by doing something they enjoyed. One thing my grandmother enjoyed doing when she was alive was travelling to sacred, religious places where I live. Every year, my family and I go to these places, pray for her and have fun because she would have wanted that for us. If you've had a split up with this person with so many unsaid things, reach out. Get your closure, clear the air of misunderstandings if there are. If it's with someone you've gradually lost touch with and the awkwardness has stopped you from reaching out. Don't. Reply to their story, send them messages or posts online. let them know that you want to rekindle the friendship. Let them know, that you are also wanting to have this relationship (platonic, romantic). I've said to try and rekindle the relationships/reach out so many times and here I am saying it again: MEND THE RELATIONSHIP!!! BUILD BACK THE FUCKING BRIDGE! Forgive them, but also most importantly, forgive YOURSELF!! It's normal being hard on yourself. This however, what you're saying/doing to yourself is not it bbg. You need love right now, sweet summer child, not criticism. Put your inner critic on the back seat, let your inner healer take control. Do some self care. Face masks, spa, massage, manicure/pedicure. Take care of yourself.

Cat 3:

You're in a crisis. You have conflicting emotions that are fluctuating so fast it's giving you whiplash. Maybe you're facing a choice where you have to leave what you have known. Maybe you're home for further studies or maybe you're planning on moving homes or cutting off contact with family or friends you've known for a long time. It's difficult, because you are potentially leaving what you've always known, what your comfortable with/or people who you've known for a long time. There will always be people who will not support your decision, especially if you're cutting off contact with close family members or friends who you used to always be with. This crisis/conflicting emotions are more so due to you not wanting to deal with criticism from people you've grown up with and less to do with whether you want to do it or not. Because you do. You know it is what you want, but the potential of people's reaction is what's stopping you. If you always walk on eggshells when making decisions, to appease the people around you, you won't make it far. Stop caring about the opinion of people who don't have your best interests at heart.

Maybe what you are pursuing (If it is further studies/a job) is something that you've always wanted to pursue but have been discouraged to do so because it: "Won't put a roof over your hear head and feed you". A creative job/study. Art, music, dance, literally anything that requires creativity. Don't let these people have you give up on your dreams and instead have you slave away at a stressful office job/"prestigious" job. Don't be afraid to splurge on yourself once in a while. Treat yourself to a nice dinner in a fancy restaurant, or buy yourself something you've always wanted. Or even simpler, take a self care day. Take your time bathing, put on a face mask, dress yourself up (even if it is just to go get groceries) If you want to see change, you must initiate it. Don't be a sheep that follows people around mindlessly, take control/the reins if you have to. Assert yourself. Let your opinions stand out, true and strong.

Cat 4:

You're stretching out something tense, maybe an argument, maybe something that really angered you. And i'm not saying that you're anger is not justified. It is, what's not justified is how you're dragging this out. Blowing this situation out of proportion, making a mountain out a molehill. You are getting on the defensive, feeling the strong urge to prove that you are correct or that you didn't do something (or perhaps did) But at this point you're arguing at the wall honey. Know when to stop your battles, get yourself in check before the universe slaps you in the face. The other party has already dropped out, not wanting to spend their time arguing an age old issue. Come to terms with what happened, and try to calmly speak your mind. If you can't, journal it. let it go.

This conflict has you shaken and feeling unsure. What I'm getting is to make sure you're not biased, make sure to listen to the other person's side as well. Just listen and make your decision then. Because if you make a decision right now, it will only be more chaotic. Don't make a decision yet, wait, give yourself some space to clear your head because you're mind is not in the right space to make important decisions right now. Maybe this conflict is between you and a friend or a sibling/family member. I'm feeling that this conflict could be solved if you were to communicate, but there is such a clear lack of it that I am quite speechless. Talk things out, calmly and clearly, let them know how they hurt you and let them apologize/talk as well. Forgive if you can. Enforce boundaries with this person, maybe they overstepped despite your warnings and it was what caused this conflict. Remember, forgiving is good but it's not necessary to heal. If this person has been constantly overstepping your boundaries, firmly set them and cut off contact if you must. Or just be very firm and strict with your boundaries, you might have a habit of caving in to this person walking all over you. Not anymore.

[a-d-nox]

I was wondering if you could do a simplified way to read a chart. like use an example chart and show where you start with and so on

how to read a chart: the planets' signs and houses

the most simple way to read a chart is to break things down by sign, planet, and house. its better to start with the basics then step it up to evaluating the aspects in a chart, degrees, house rulers, asteroids, etc. there is plenty more to look at but this is a starting point - if there is interest, i will continue the discussion in a series. i am going to do something that i have never done before and dissect my own chart in front of everyone who is reading this in the most non-biased way in which i am capable.

the ascendant

pisces: as we know, a pisces rising is a skilled chameleon. they are so skilled that they can vanish into their surroundings. it is uncommon for a pisces to stand out even though they can be thought of as beautiful. most people take them for granted - people don't often give them the recognition they deserve. and because they don't, a pisces rising will undervalue themselves. not that they really want tons of recognition and power - that can be too much for an aloof and dreamy pisces person. a pisces rising is likely to create a persona to present to others - they can very quickly lose their true self to it too...

sun

scorpio: its like a dramatic love story - sex appeal meets jealously and obsessiveness. scorpio suns are known for their depth, obsessive, and analytical thoughts. they, like sheldon cooper, "don't need sleep" they "need answers". they will take things to the extreme if they don't find the answers they seek. they seek insight and intimacy - they want everything they can get out of life. scorpios are natural chasers - persistent ones at that. they are a bit childish though because they want everything to themselves including their knowledge - they might even weaponize what they know to be cruel to those they feel wronged them.

8h: 8h sun people are deep people - they don't do fluffy stuff. they like things succinct and purposeful. often they are identified as know intuitives - i mean they have the ability, they just need to tap into it and use/control it. they often hunger for self-knowledge (stuff like shadow-work, psychology, astrology, philosophy, etc is attractive to them). introspection is an art form for them. they enjoy analyzing and obsessing over things like that. either a 8h sun is driven by sex OR money, growth, and power OR maybe all of the above.

moon

scorpio: they have a very deep well of emotional energy - they feel nothing halfway. they are easily provoked and can go 0 to 100 very quickly (they are prone to boiling over / experiencing sudden outbursts). every emotion is very pure/vivid. they can be harsh and even cruel in emotional situations... emotionally, they are possessive and tend assume that others around them don't have it as bad as they do. everything can be a comparison for them - if someone is upset over something, they will comment with something "worse" that they previously experienced. they are quick to respond/react - they aren't the type to think before responding when they are upset. though they are sensitive, they have great inner strength and have the power to overcome any difficult emotional situations.

8h: emotionality is like a sixth sense - these people are intuitively gifted; they can sense not only their own feelings but everyone else's around them too. they are often obsessive when they feel intensely like this, especially when they are romantic. trust to them is the most important part of any connection. they are naturally jealous and suspicious of others so when they can't trust someone to be honest with them, they won't be vulnerable at all - they become cold and stoic. their trust issues are next level and often need professional help to work through. security is important to them in all senses so monetary savings are of their interest too.

mercury

scorpio: these people are intuitive and are known for their intensity. they have the gift of being logical/rational and determined all at once - they make great sleuths and detectives. generally, they struggle to leave any stones unturned. they hunger for truth and honesty, thus they enjoy research and the search for such. there is a tendency to become obsessive with the hunt for truth and honesty. they are often more introverted and apathetic than those around them. they struggle to open up just as they struggle to find honesty/trustworthiness in those around them. they are intellectual individuals who are easily fascinated.

8h: pessimism and/or deep thoughts are real with this placement. they have a dark mind that might be best suited for philosophy (especially existentialism) and/or occultism. they are predisposed to being overwhelmed by their emotions and being overly sensitive. often they are overcome by fantastical thoughts due to their over active mind. they seek spiritual growth via research and exploring life's many mysteries.

venus

sagittarius: these people are warm, enthusiastic, and lively. they require their independence - feeling tied too one person can be suffocating to them, especially, if that one person only fills their sexual or intellectual needs. they require both to feel comfortable staying in a connection. even then they are likely to experience more than one great romance in their lifetime. their relationships are best built on friendship first.

9h: there is a great hunger for travel and experience when it comes to this person. they are extremely likely to fall in love with a foreign land or a foreigner. it is considered rare for them to never travel and to in the stay in the same place they were born life long. they are notably wise and philosophical people who have an idealistic view and opinion of the world around them. university is likely to be an enjoyable experience for them where they gain more than just bookish experience that impacts them life long.

mars

virgo: these are willing and hard workers. they have a lot of nervous energy and tend to want to keep their hands busy - they don't do well when there is nothing to do. it makes them edgy and tense. they require a steady routine and timetables. without such things they might lose motivation to get anything done and they likely feel pain bodily (they have a stomach ache, head ache, skin issues, etc). but when they have something to do they are patient and detailed with their work. if they lack self-confidence, their work could fail to come to fruition. too much attention to detail may lead to analysis paralysis.

7h: these people are passionate and are willing to work through anything in a connection. they do have the tendency to push their partners too much to the point where they push them away. their relationships are always with a sense of purpose and direction - they are unlikely to date without intentions of a long term connection. these partnerships are great for those that professionally work together as well - they tend to have a shared objective in that monetary matter.

jupiter

gemini: these people are knowledge starved. enough is never enough for them - they are intellectually restless. they could seem very scattered because they seek knowledge of all things. they need to be more consistent with their efforts if they wish to gain anything at all. these individuals are broad/open minded and tend to be very clever. they have a quick mind that critically thinks in the craftiest ways possible.

3h: these people feel a great need to exercise their mind, and they seek intellectual challenges. often they wish to share their opinions and they tend to impose them on to others (they frequently think their opinion is fact). they have excellent communication skills and a great sense of what is just and what is not. they are people of their word and that word is reliable. they love school and to learn - even when school ends for them, they will continue to seek education. they are restless people who need both mental and physical mobility.

saturn

taurus: these people are patient, careful, and cautious. they will persist despite suffering until they have or accomplish whatever it is they want. while they are typically kind they can however become mean and overly frugal. they are ambitious and often seek financial stability which can support their their lifestyle. they frequently will ask if they truly need something however. they are overly rigid and routine oriented. they grow to appreciate what is functional over what is beautiful.

3h: it is possible that this person hated school or didn't think they were good at it at some point. often, they triumph as time goes on however. they develop skills (and fill gaps in their education) to overcome obstacles they have in the educational sector and might even become first in their class or prominent in some other way. these people are sensible and practical - they tend to be cautious and conservative when it comes to their long-term plans.

uranus

aquarius: this generation is notably kind, friendly, and inclusive. they want everyone to feel comfortable and as though they belong and are supported. often everyone in the generation has a bit of a humanitarian streak. they wish to keep their independence in most every way. they can be a bit unpredictable, inventive, and original. they typically associate money as a means of charity to ease suffering in a practical way.

12h: these people feel the need to be charitable and make sacrifices for others. strangely, they have the tendency of doing so in a logical and unemotional/cool/detached way. they do so because of some subconscious belief/motivation. often, they will trying to understand what they do and why they do it using astrology, when they truly should leave it to the psychological professionals.

neptune

aquarius: i feel like this is why we are the way we are online as a generation. we can be hyper emotional one moment then cold and detached the next. we like to stand out yet we are followers of trends and prefer to blend in. we are sensitive and intuitive, yet uncomfortable with dependence and prefer a touch of logic.

11h: these people tend to have a lively social life that keeps them busy, however, they might not have the best circle of friends. their friends might take them in, only to use them. their caring nature is often used. they enjoy helping others. they aren't fans of having lots of responsibilities. they might be very worried or concerned when having such - heavy expectations cause them too much stress.

pluto

sagittarius: this group of people is in a mental tug-of-war. they are open but secretive. they seek independence yet are possessive. they are fun loving yet prefer intimacy and intensity. often, this combo appears to me like a purge moment - get all the terrible energy out every once and awhile and be civil the next period of time. we are the people of the revolution; we see it in how we stand up to political powers and fight for our rights. we do what we do because we are wise and know that all people deserve freedom and autonomy.

9h: this is a compulsive studier who loves a mental challenge. it doesn't matter how advanced the topic is, they desire it. often to the point of mental strain. they desire intellectual perfection - this is their downfall as they force themselves to the extreme and only become unhappy with their progress and frustrated with themselves. they frequently give up and walk away in a dramatic fashion to their detriment. apart from that, i recommend that they visit a country apart from their own as they are likely to gain significant experience and knowledge in a foreign place apart from the one they already know.

the midheaven

sagittarius: to an outsider they appear excited and enthusiastic to just exist in a space. people might see them as risk takers. they are boisterous to those that watch them - they are charming, flirty, and quite funny. but they need to be careful their charm and flirtiness can attract the wrong people or cause them to assume the wrong instincts. not everyone finds the jokes that are made funny - some find them insulting. they can also seem flighty and like they do too much at once. it is important that they read the fine print of any public or high up position that they take.

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[spiritualitygeek]

~ PAC: Your Mystical Mosaic ~

Where is your current energy leading you?

Disclaimer:

This pac is for entertainment purpose only. I am not liable for any actions or decisions taken or made based on the information presented in the reading. The interpretations and insights are subjective and open to individual perception. Please use your own judgment and intuition when applying the messages to your life or situation. Thank you!

Pile 1 ~ 🪄

the fool, 9op, aoc

All positive cards for you, Pile 1, which is amazing! I can clearly see you're about to embark on a new journey with a very positive and determined mindset. You're fearlessly diving into new adventures just for the thrill of it, without caring about what others think or even expect out of you. You exude a very warm and gentle energy, like someone who has faced challenges in life but hasn't let them dim their light. Your loving and joyful nature attracts people towards you, and you might find yourself being a natural healer to those in need.

Your current energy is attracting abundance, creativity, and happiness into your life. It's like a box full of blessings is on its way to you. You're manifesting your biggest desires, whether it's financial independence, glowup, specific person, or something else you deeply yearn for.

In this new journey, there's a strong possibility of finding a new love interest or forming a deep connection with a new best friend. For those not seeking romantic or platonic relationships, you could discover a new hobby or passion that brings you immense joy.

You've been seeking signs from the universe about your life purpose and career, and it seems like you're finding your true passion. Your faith in the divine timing is unwavering, and you're manifesting your dreams through pure belief.

If you're currently in the flow of life, trusting in the universe's plan, you're on the right path and a true winner. Your understanding of this concept sets you apart and leads you towards a fulfilling and abundant future.

Pile 2 🦋

the temperance, 8ow, knight-os

Okay Pile 2, you legit need to calm down/slow down. I just heard, "Hold your horses!" Your energy is everywhere.

What's the rush, love? You're running too fast as if there's a train or a flight you gotta catch. You're feeling as if you're running out of time, or that you're lacking behind. You're ambitious and it's good to be. But moving so fast and without caring to think before you act can sometimes put you in undesirable spot. It has happened with me recently and it happens almost all the time? I am quite like that myself. Sometimes, it can be out of overconfidence, other times it's anxiety. It's crucial to know the reasons and work on them.

I'm getting Mars dominant, Mars in first house or Aries/Scorpio energy. I'm a Scorpio moon and I have Mars in my first house so girl, I get you! I really do!

With the Temperance card, angels advise you to attain that balance, harmony, and modesty. You are encouraged to seek a middle ground, to balance opposing forces, and deal with circumstances carefully and composedly. In addition, it takes self-control and patience to get through life's challenges. You don't have to be so ferocious, fiesty, and overwhelmed. You're getting my point?

Also, are you juggling a lot and all on your own? You don't need to do everything on your own. Are you for real? I know you're awkward around people and you don't like asking for help but there's no loss in trying, love. There are people who are more than willing to help you. Atleast, ask them?

Lastly, I'd like to conclude with the fact that I saw the number 8 in my vision while shuffling for you and the card that came out was 8 of Wands and then I saw number 8 on my phone suddenly. So it's an 888. It can be a sign. Something you've been seeing frequently these days? Please check for the meaning of 888 angel number and decide what could it mean for you.

Pile 3 💭

8os, 5os, 5owX

Pile 3, I'm seeing you being trapped or restricted in a cage/prison, a prison you've built around yourself or have surrendered yourself, possibly due to past actions which you deem as mistakes. There's someone in your close circle of friends or family who you're mad at. For some of you, it's yourself who you're blaming! For not taking that leap of faith, or for leaving that job that offered you stability. For not being patient enough or not being careful enough. For not allowing you to be you or for not having enough freedom to try everything you wanted to.

You're feeling trapped in a cycle. A cycle that's repetitive, too mundane that you're sick of it. You want to go away to leave it all behind. You don't like the way things are. The way you are? And you're blaming them/yourself for it.

I know my words would come off harsh, but you're acting like a victim, not realising you can choose not to be one. It's not about survival, it's about existing! Life is a gift. And you're a divine being! Count your blessings instead of mishaps and you'll see a drastic change in everything, including your mindset. "Attitude of gratitude" ever heard of it?

Currently, you might be attracting situations that reflect the need to break free from self-imposed limitations and negative thought patterns. Financial problems, weakening relationships, unhappy job situation. You're aimlessly wandering for that funding for your project and so on...

You're determined, more than ever right now to go get it! But trust me anything that you start with this negativity within you, will only bring disaster in its wake. The self doubt and victimization will only bring more of it. There's things that need to be addressed. Matters that need to be resolved. Don't run away from them. Face your fears. Confront it head on! Don't avoid conflict. Be it with your own conscience or with your family/friends. The person or situation you're blaming, forgive them. Let go of them! It's nobody's fault. It doesn't have to be.

This combination of cards is your call to embrace self-empowerment, letting go of past grudges and forgiving yourself and others for past mistakes. What's done is done! Past is past for a reason. You have control over your present and future though. It's essential to confront any inner conflicts or self-doubt to find a sense of peace and clarity in your life.

The advice for you is to take a step back and reassess your current situation. Look for opportunities to release negative energy and work towards healing any emotional wounds. Embrace a more open and compassionate approach to yourself and others, as this will help attract positive and harmonious energies into your life. Remember, you have the power to overcome obstacles and create a more balanced and fulfilling future. Blaming yourself and others never helps. Trust me, I've been there!

Thank you all for taking the time to read my pac. I hope the insights resonated with you and provided some guidance. If you found this helpful, I'd be grateful if you consider following me for more spiritual content and future tarot readings. Wishing you all love, light, and positivity on your journey! ✨

- with love, Snow ❄️

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[ponett]

Hello, wanted to say thank you, I'm really glad I found your work and I find your insights very helpful.

I wanted to ask something strange, as someone who has gone out of their way to dedicate a very detailed blog to the works of an outspoken artist, can you give me advice how to maintain healthy distance with ideas and individuals I might outright oppose, but have morbid sense of curiosity about them? Or it it just better to not indulge at all?

It's a difficult balance to achieve, and I won't pretend I've always been perfect about it on TKP

The thing is that you have to not obsess over the person too much. You have to focus on their work, not detailing every single thing they've ever done or said to keep receipts on them. You do not, under any circumstances, want to turn into the freaks who make and watch hundred hour long "documentaries" on CWC and Sonichu, or the people who run the Bad Webcomics Wiki

The point is to do media criticism, not to make a callout blog. Details the artist has shared about their life may sometimes help inform your reading of the work - art isn't made in a vacuum, and artists' life experiences and worldviews often shape their art. But you don't need to pry too much and piece together their full life story and psychoanalyze them if that information isn't already available in an autobiography or whatever

On TKP, one of the most important things I do to try and keep that distance is simple: I don't follow Penders on Twitter. I don't need to know every single thing he says, nor do I need to report on it. I'll check in when I hear he's made some kind of announcement regarding his work, and when looking for behind the scenes info I'll sometimes term search on his Twitter because he's far more vocal about what happened behind the scenes than the rest of that creative team, but that's it. I'm not thinking about him every day. I also haven't gone in-depth on his non-Sonic work to help drive home the idea that TKP is a blog about the American Sonic comics with a quippy url, not a blog about shitting on Penders

(On that note: I don't interact with him directly, either. I do not need to dunk on him in his Twitter replies. I do not need to lure him into an interview where I totally own him. I am not sending him my criticism like he owes it to me to read it and improve his work. I leave the guy alone)

As the blog has gone on I've also tried much harder to be objective about him and his work. I'll admit that early on, before the blog blew up, I was eager to see what all the drama was about and why everybody hated the guy. But my goal isn't just to find excuses to hate on him, or to spread baseless gossip, and that shouldn't be the mindset you go in with. I've offered praise for some of his work where I thought it was deserved, and I frequently correct people on misunderstandings about him and the lawsuits, even defending him on certain points

This is an extremely basic and hopefully obvious element of good media criticism, but it should also be said that just because an artist depicts something doesn't necessarily mean they endorse it, and that your goal isn't to piece together the artist's beliefs based on their work and then call them out over it. It can go the other way around - you can analyze how an artist's stated beliefs and values are reflected in their work - but, like, Penders writing a story where Knuckles decides to forgive his shitty fascist uncle for no reason does not mean that Penders is a Nazi apologist. It's just a story.

Again: your main goal should be to criticize the work, not the artist

And, of course, a huge factor is simply how famous the creator in question is (and also if the creator is still alive). You wanna do a deep dive on the works of Steve Ditko and criticize his Randian objectivism? Go nuts, buddy! You wanna shit all over Lovecraft? Have at it! Wanna tear apart the neoliberal politics of Harry Potter? Well, okay, Shrieking Shack already did that one. But if the person you're thinking of doing a sprawling, in-depth teardown on is, like, a smalltime webcomic author? Some hobbyist indie dev? A fanfic writer? That sort of thing? Hell, even someone in the middle like a cartoon storyboarder, or a freelance writer who does articles for Kotaku sometimes? Maybe reconsider. Just because someone's online doesn't mean they're a Public Figure, and there's a line where a deep critical dive on someone's work quickly turns into painting a target on their back

(This ended up being more about Criticism than how to just engage with stuff you hate, but also you can just, like. Look away. And find something else spend your time thinking about.)

[jobean12-blog]

Under Your Skin

Pairing: Eddie Munson x reader (Tattoo!Artist!Eddie AU)

Word Count: 2,913

Summary: You and Eddie have been friends for some time but you still haven’t been in to visit him at work but you finally get up the nerve to do it and maybe even to do something even more exciting...and then some. 

Author’s Note: I’ve been wanting to write his AU with Eddie for a while and I cannot thank my lovely friends enough for all their insight into the world @sillyrabbit81 @mrsmischief209 @ysmmsy @buckysdollforlife @blizzspeaks This is for my sweet Jen’s @late-to-the-party-81 1k Follower Celebration and Challenge Yourself Challenge! This is the first time I’m doing this AU so it seemed like the perfect push! Thank you for hosting love and congratulations on a much deserved and amazing milestone! Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by @wannabehamlet thank you darling so much! 🥰

Warnings: fun and flirty tension and fluff :) 

GIF NOT MINE: Creidt goes to @barnesdjarin thank you sweets 🥰

Eddie Munson Masterlist

Your hand is clammy as it closes around the handle of the door and you give it a pull that’s too hard, the motion making you jerk back unexpectedly.

You crash into Robin with a muttered apology and step inside. A little bell over the door chimes and indicates your arrival. You take a deep breath and survey the shop.

The first thing you notice is the clean and sanitary smell. That, and the fact that the colorful paint on the walls is barely visible under all the artwork, photos and records that lines them.

“Wow,” you whisper in awe, taking it all in.

“Now that’s what I like to hear when people walk into my shop.”

Your attention is momentarily drawn away from the decorative walls when you hear the sound of his voice.

“Hello ladies,” he croons before his gaze settles on you. “So glad you finally made it in to see me.”  

You stop and stare, a new kind of nervousness making your heart skip a beat.  

It’s the first time you’re visiting Eddie at his new Tattoo shop and you’re already in love.

“Hi Eddie,” Robin says, elbowing you.

“Oh!” you squeak. “Hey Eddie.”

“So, what can I do for you?”

“We want a tattoo,” Robin says with a bright smile. She then points at you and says, “well, she does.”

His eyes are trained on you as they sweep down your body and back up to your face.

“This is your first one right?” he asks with a wink.

“Yes,” you declare and dip your head.

“Don’t worry sweetheart. I’ll take good care of you.”

He moves closer and rests a gentle hand on your lower back, ushering you forward.  

“Not gonna lie, I’m really fucking excited you’re here,” he says quietly, his lips just barely brushing your ear.

You shiver in response and turn your head, your faces only inches apart.

“I’m nervous,” you blurt out, your breath catching in your throat when his eyes drop to your lips.

“You’re in good hands,” he murmurs, sliding his fingers up your back before he motions for you to sit on the couch.

Robin joins you, grinning as she looks at the shop walls.

“Are these pictures of your band?” Robin asks.

“That’s us. Corroded Coffin,” he answers with a pleased smile while he rummages through supplies on the table.

“I like your guitar,” you say as you study one picture in particular.

“Thanks. She’s a beauty right?”

You nod and continue to look around. Without thinking you get up and start to move about the shop, noticing that some of the artwork is signed with Eddie’s name.

“Your artwork is amazing,” you point out.

“Thanks,” Eddie answers. “Wait until you see your tattoo.”

He waggles his eyebrows and sticks out his tongue, his silly face making you laugh and easing some of your anxieties.

“So, I sorta have an idea, but I don’t really have a solid idea. I kind of know what I want but at the same time I don’t have a clear picture and I’m nervous it will hurt and…”

Eddie gives you a soft smile as your words trail off and you shuffle your feet. You can hear Robins pained groan but you keep your eyes on him.

“I can help you bring your idea to life; you just tell me what you’re thinking and I’ll make it happen.”

“Really? It’s that easy?” you ask, your tone disbelieving.

“I’m a man of many talents,” he tells you. “Like I said, you’re in good hands with me sweetheart.”

You audibly swallow and will your heart rate to slow down.  

“Give me a minute. I was just finishing some paperwork when you came in,” he says.

He walks to the back of the shop and disappears behind a door. You swing around and look at Robin with wide eyes.

“He’s too hot,” you whisper shout. “I can’t let him give me a tattoo! This is too much.”  

“Oh don’t be such a dingus!” she answers, throwing her hands up. “And why can’t you!? You heard him. He’s talented and you’re in good hands.”

“His hands…” you nearly whine, rubbing your own over your face. “The rings…I’m not gonna make it.”

She smirks with a sparkle in her eye and you blow out an exaggerated raspberry.

“I’ve been here less than five minutes and I’m already making a fool of myself and if he actually puts his hands on me I’m going to faint for sure.”

Before Robin can give you a proper pep talk, Eddie saunters back into the front of the shop with a smile.

“So talk to me sweetheart, what are you thinking?”

He sits down on a rolling leather stool and slides himself toward you.

“Maybe on my shoulder and something with the ocean? A wave? A sea turtle? Some other cute sea creature?”

He smiles brightly and the skin around his eyes crinkles delicately, their warm color making you inwardly sigh.

“Can you take this off for me?” he asks, motioning to your hoodie.

“Sure,” you answer, feeling your skin heat.

You shrug off the garment and turn your body to show him the spot you’re thinking of putting it.

His eyes fill with heat at your newly exposed skin and you lick your lips and when he softly brushes his fingertips over your skin it sends a rush of warmth through your body.

Once you determine how big you want it and the spot you want it in he grabs what he needs to sketch it out.

“Tell me about your favorite memory of the ocean or the beach,” he says, placing his pencil to the paper.

As you rattle off your thoughts, Robin smiles and gets up from the couch to look around more. You don’t even notice that she’s gone and by the time you’re done talking Eddie has a sketch drawn up and he’s grinning.

“Oh my god, I’m sorry for my rambling. I hope that wasn’t too much.”

“Nah sweetheart, it was perfect. Are you ready to see?”

You nod excitedly and wait.

He lifts the sketch up and turns it around so you can see. You gasp softly, covering your mouth with your hand as your eyes take in the drawing.

“Eddie,” you whisper. “Wow.”

“That’s the second time you’ve used that word in my presence,” he teases. “You’re going to give me a big head.”

You giggle and take the paper from his hand. “It’s absolutely gorgeous. I love it. I didn’t even know I wanted this.”

He leans closer, studying first the drawing then your face. “It’s going to be even more beautiful on you.”

Robin’s playful scoff pulls both you and Eddie out of your moment and your heads simultaneously turn her way.

“What?” you ask with narrowed eyes.

“So cheesy Munson,” she states with a deadpan look.

Eddie narrows his eyes and throws her the finger.

She laughs and gives him one back.

“But it is really amazing,” she adds.

The corner of Eddie’s mouth lifts into a boyish smile and he winks at you again.  

“Ready to get started?” Eddie asks, taking your hand.

You visibly stiffen and your palm starts to sweat against his.

“I uh…I think so.”

He pulls you to your feet and tucks you into his side.

“Come on, let’s get you comfortable,” he says assuredly.

He brings you over to the tattoo bed and has you sit down.

“You have to sign this waiver first,” he explains, letting you take your time reading over the paper.

“Any allergies?” he asks.

“Nope,” you reply as you sign your name.

“Did you eat lunch?” he asks, giving you a lopsided grin when you look at him like he’s crazy.

“Umm, I did but that was about two hours ago.”

He holds up a ringed finger and jogs to the back of the shop, returning quickly with some juice and cookies.

“Here,” he says, holding both out. “Have a drink and a cookie. It’ll help.”

You open your mouth to say “wow” again, your lips shaped just so and Eddie grins, staring at your mouth before he drags his eyes up.

“Were you about to ‘wow’ me again?” he asks, his eyebrows raised.

“Yes,” you giggle. “You really meant it when you said you’d take care of me.”

“Of course,” he tells you.

“I’m sure this is how you treat all your clients,” you say with a lighthearted roll of your eyes.

“Nah, only the ones I’m hoping to keep around,” he simpers.

“Smooth Eddie,” Robin pokes from her spot across the room. “Real smooth.”

Eddie ignores Robin’s jabs and keeps his focus on you.

You catch your bottom lip between your teeth and lower your lashes, hoping to hide how his words affect you.

“Hey,” he says quietly and you bring your gaze back up to meet his. “You good?”

“I’m good.”

“I want you to talk to me the whole time and if it ever gets too much just let me know,” he says, giving you a pointed look.

“I will,” you whisper.

“Pinky promise?” he asks, holding up his pinky finger.

“Promise,” you smile and wrap your pinky around his.

You watch as he gathers his tools, double checking that everything is clean and sterile. He prepares the ink and the machine, explaining everything as he goes.

“Ok, we’ve gotta get these out of the way,” he says as he slips his fingers under the straps of your tank top and bra.

He slowly slides them down until they rest along your upper arm, before softly caressing your shoulder. The whole interaction feels intimate and you take a deep breath, relieved that he can’t see your face at the moment.  

“This might be a little cold,” he warns as he preps your skin by cleaning it.

Even with his gloves on you love the feel of his hands on you. When he places the stencil over your skin you can feel the press of his rings and you have to suppress a shiver.

“Here, take the mirror and make sure it’s where you want it.”

You stand and use the small mirror to check the placement, your eyes drifting to meet Eddie’s in the reflection.

“That’s the spot,” you say.

“Fuck yeah! Let’s do this sweetheart. I’m ready to start if you are.”

He straightens out the tattoo table and helps you get comfortable lying on your stomach with your face resting in the hole. You can see his spread legs as he rolls his stool closer and it momentarily makes you forget why you’re there.  

“Still with me?” he asks softly.

“Yes,” you breathe out, the combined nervousness of the impending tattoo and his close proximity mixing into some kind of dizzying intoxication.  

“Robin can hold your hand if you want,” he says, peeking over at her. “I would do it but I need both of mine.”

His charming words make you smile and some of your tension eases with your deep exhale.  

Robin rushes to your side and sits with her hand held out.

“You’ve got his babe,” she says confidently.

“You do,” Eddie adds.

The buzz of the machine makes you visibly tense and Eddie rests his hand on the back of your thigh.

“I need you to be a good girl for me and relax sweetheart,” he tells you when he leans down near your ear. “Can you do that?”

You make a small sound of agreement, holding back a whimper at his use of ‘good girl’ and decide that concentrating on his thighs is a good distraction. The first prick of the needle is painful but you start counting the rips in his jeans and the pain slowly eases into a mild discomfort.  

Heat radiates off his body and you soak it in, the smell of his shampoo lingering in the air every time he shifts and his curls bounce and sway.

After his third check in you ask him for a small break. He helps you to sit up, your arm curled around his neck and your body slightly shaky.

“You ok sweetheart?” he asks, pressing his fingers under your chin and lifting your eyes to his.

“Yea. Maybe just another sip of juice?”

“Of course,” he says, but keeps you in his arms. “Hey Robin, can you grab her glass for me?”

Robin gets it and starts to hand it to you but Eddie intercepts it and holds it to your lips.

“I can take a drink myself you know.”

Your words end on a giggle but you don’t stop him when he says “open up,” and gives you small sips.

“Better?” he asks.

“Much.”

He takes the glass away from your mouth and holds it out to Robin but never takes his eyes off your face, his gaze dropping to your lips. When he feels the weight of the glass disappear from his hand he swipes his thumb across your bottom lip.

“Just had a little spot of juice…”

His words are whispered and breathy as his head dips lower.

“Her tattoo isn’t finished you know!” Robin chirps from the other side of the table.

Eddie jerks his head away and shoots Robin a glare. You bury your face in Eddie’s neck and give him a squeeze.

“Alright then, let’s get this piece finished,” Eddie grumbles, still giving Robin a look.

Once you’re settled comfortably again he gets back to work, continuing to check in with you regularly.

“We’re almost done,” he says excitedly.

Robin squeals. “It looks insane!”

His fingers press against your skin, warm and strong and with a few more touches he’s finished.

“Are you ready to see it?”

His eyes are bright with anticipation as he helps you into a sitting position. You start to stand but he stops you.

“Slow down sweetheart, don’t stand just yet. I can get you the mirror to see.”

He positions you so you can see your shoulder in the reflection and your eyes go wide.

“Oh my god,” you gasp.

Eddie suddenly looks nervous, his palms sliding down his jeans and his shoulders tensing.

“Is that good?” he asks, his tone worried.

“Wow,” you say, turning your eyes to him with a huge smile.

“Another wow huh?” he grins, instantly relaxing.

“Eddie…it’s…it’s…wow.”

“That’s two!” Robin states, looking between you both.

“I’m so glad you like it sweetheart. Looks gorgeous on you.”

“Thank you, I really love it.”

You continue to stare at the piece of art tattooed on your shoulder and the longer you do, the happier Eddie gets.

“Can I stand up now?” you ask with a smirk.

“Sure,” he replies, taking your hand.

You stand on wobbly legs and fall into his arms. He catches you and cradles you against his chest, smoothing his hand along your back.

“I got you,” he whispers.

“I feel a little dizzy,” you explain.

“That’s totally normal. Why don’t we sit?”

He leads you over to the couch and sits, patting his leg.

“There’s plenty of room on the couch,” you tell him with mischief dancing in your eyes.

“Yea but his lap is better,” Robin interjects as she gives you a light shove.

You plop down into Eddie’s lap with a small oof and he wraps you in his arms, careful not to touch your tattoo.

“Better?” he asks with a smug smile.

“You’re very comfortable,” you say in response before glaring daggers up at Robin.

“What?” she asks incredulously. “You’re a dingus. I know that’s where you really want to be.”

Your mouth drops open and you huff out in frustration but regardless curl yourself into Eddie’s chest.

“How long should I sit?” you ask him.

“As long as you want,” he murmurs. “But I do have to go over a few things with you. After care and all that.”

He tilts his head, inching his face closer to yours.

“That’s my cue to leave, my work here is done! Bye dudes!” Robin sings with a triumphant grin and rushes out.

Neither you nor Eddie even notice.

“Uh huh,” you nod, twirling a piece of his hair around your finger. “Like what?”

“Likeeee,” he drags out the word and pretends to think as his eyes wander over your features. “Don’t go swimming anytime soon and stay out of the sun.”

“Eddie. It’s January.”

“It is?” he asks, dropping his nose to your neck and inhaling softly with a satisfied hum.

You make a small whimper and your nails dig into his shoulders.

“Anything else?” you manage to ask, your eyelashes fluttering against your cheeks.

“Hmm, you have to clean it 2-3 times a day and I can give you some ointment for it….and I have to clean it again and cover it before you leave.”

“I think I can manage that,” you tell him, biting your bottom lip when his nose runs the length of your neck and you feel his lips trail along your jaw.

“You did so well today,” he whispers, as he tilts his head and you feel his hands flex on your hips.

“I did?” you ask, your words nearly breathless as you squeeze your legs together.

A muscle in his jaw flexes and he smooths one hand up your arm until his long fingers cradle your cheek.

“Such a good girl,” he promises with the lightest brush of his lips, just a whisper, before he captures your mouth in a hungry kiss.

@dreamlessinparis @hiddles-rose​ @goldylions​ @blackwidownat2814​

[trashmouth-richie]

Series summary: Hawkins Annual Halloween Festival is in town, and this year you and your friends were lucky enough to work the event. But when some of your co-workers are missing, and a trail of blood leads to the woods behind the festival. Your friends work together to find out what’s going on. A killer is on the loose but who could it be? Or is it the town’s spooky secret of what really happened at Hawkins Lab?

ch 1: FLICKER

ch 2: A SCREAM AND A SLICE

ch 3: THE ROCKSTAR AND THR REDLIGHTS

chapter summary: flashbacks provide some insight on our favorite metalhead.

chapter trigger warnings: 18+ only, character death, references to child neglect, upside down references, poor parenting practices, etc, blood, character death, killer reveal.

CH. 4: FAMILY VALUES

1974

The tires on Evil Kneivel’s Stunt Bike trudged through the familiar path of the bare thread carpet in the back bedroom of trailer 8 in Forest Hills Trailer Park. Eddie was on his stomach, ignoring the rumbling noise from the hollow emptiness in his belly, he pressed his lips together to vibrate a motorcycle sound through his mouth, casually blowing dark curls from his vision. 

An annoyed huff echoed across the thin walls, “This is boring,” Billy snarled, he was laying flat on Eddie’s bed, feet on the wall, throwing up his stretch Armstrong to himself before tossing it across the room, landing with a splat on the broken closet door. 

Eddie pushed himself up from the carpet, the fibers itching through the holes in his jeans and scratching his knees. 

He shrugs, running his tongue through the gap of his latest pulled tooth, “wanna see my guitar?” 

“No,” Billy huffed, his thumb nail catching along the ridges of the zippo lighter he had stolen from Melvalds, lighting a small flame that he quickly extinguished with the flip of the lid. “I wanna do something fun.”

“Alright then, genius,” Eddie scowls, sitting next to Billy on the brown and burgundy ripped threads of an afghan blanket, “what do you have in mind?” 

Billy swings his feet around, landing with ease and standing before his friend, the smirk on Billy’s face was one Eddie knew all too well. 

—

Neil and Al didn’t hear the boys sneak out from the back room, too drunk and elbow deep in “work” to notice their sons had pushed the screen outward and hopped down to the ground. 

“The instructions are clear, Al,” Neil said, his mouth around a can of Pabst, scrubbing a dirty thumbnail through his eyebrow, “here let me see that.” 

Al blows a cloud of smoke into the air, handing over the poorly written note on the back of the Hideout napkin, clad with ketchup stains and spilled coffee. “Don’t know how you can even read this shit.”

“I can read that’s how I can read it dumb fuck,” Neil snapped, grabbing the napkin from him, he looks over the scratchy pen marks, pointing at the instructions again, “see right there, Creel laid it all out for us.” 

“Okay wise ass, but it doesn’t make sense. How the hell are we supposed to break int- into that place without anyone seeing us?” Al puts the butt of his cigarette into the overflowing ashtray, blowing smoke around the side of his mouth. “It’s under surveillance and the guards are armed.” 

“The guards are armed.” Neil mocks, “Jesus Christ you sound just like a woman, how many cars have we boosted?”

“That’s different, easy. Breaking into a secret government lab? This is above our pay grade, and your skill level.” 

“Yeah and your big brains are why you got fired from the mill right?” 

“Shit,” Al downplays, “they didn’t pay worth a damn, boosting and dealin’ keep my pockets lined just fine.” 

“If only it was enough to keep Liz around right?”

“Don’t say that bitch’s name in this house, I’ll slit your throat and use it for an ashtray, Hargrove.” 

“Ahh shit,” Neil quips, “don’t get your panties wadded up, but back to this,” he says waving the napkin around, “the tunnels, that’s our way in.” 

—-

Eddie’s van is barreling down the highway like a bat out of hell. Nancy hasn’t stopped crying, slowly wiping her tears, with the front of her shirt, sniffling every so often. 

You’re grief stricken, numb to whatever the hell just happened, and what those things even were— and to top it all off, Eddie somehow knows?

Steve is leaning on the center console between you and Eddie, back seat driving and giving him directions on how to get to his house. 

At first Eddie had thought about going to his trailer, he knew his dad and Wayne kept their rifles in the back shed, but decided against it at the last minute, hollering over his shoulder for anyone having an idea of where to go. 

How safe could he keep everyone if his house was bordering on enemy lines? 

—-

1983

The Hargrove’s house was nestled on Cherry. Older but comfortable, a damn sight better than the paper thin walls of the trailer, and the soggy couch that reeked of spilt beer. 

Billy was going on and on about his girlfriends, yes plural. The blonde haired Gina or was it Jenny? And Tanya, the rich one who lived by Steve Harrington. 

Junior year was different for the boys, where Billy excelled in popularity with the jocks being a basketball star, Eddie fell into a different crowd, the Hellfire Club.  

They were still friends, still causing trouble on nights you couldn’t hang out, Billy now refusing entirely to hang out with Eddie when you were around, which you weren’t complaining about. 

Eddie takes another swig of Mt. Dew and continues drawing a rogue for one of the older guys, Nico, in Hellfire. He was only half listening to the way Billy was describing the differences between the girls, body type mostly. 

“If you want in on the action big boy just let me know, Gina loves hearing Metallica play when we steam up the windows in my car if ya know what I mean,” the cigarette hanging limply from his lips wiggled as he spoke, sending ashes down to his black converse. 

Eddie immediately thought of you. He wasn’t sure of his feelings when it came to you but he wondered if you’d be weirded out that Billy was planning to get him a date. How would you feel if he went out with some chick?

The idea of you kissing someone made his stomach turn, and not in a butterfly way. 

Instead of listening to Billy bitch about how much he can’t stand you and how you’re holding Eddie back he just went along with it, “yeah man, sounds good.” 

“Sounds good?” Billy questions, racking the weights he was lifting with a thud, checking his traps in his reflection, shooting a look over his shoulder, “I’m trying to get you laid, dude.” 

Eddie looks up from his seated position in the corner of Billy’s room, his fingers were silvery from shading the lines of his drawing, pinked eraser rubberings littered the front of his new Metallica shirt. “Yeah man, I’m down, what’s her number.” 

Eddie wrote the number on the corner of his paper, barely registering what else Billy was saying, his mind wandering to what kind of shit his dad was up to this time. 

Al was home for a longer stretch than normal this time, but he seemed to spend every waking minute at the Hargrove’s.

Eddie wasn’t dumb enough to think that his dad actually wanted to hangout with him. 

Oh no, Al Munson had his priorities whenever he came back to Hawkins with his tail between his legs, and seeing his only son wasn't the top of the list. 

He went to the bar first, picking out the waitress with zero confidence, saying all the right things and tipping her just enough to make her think she was really something. When her shift was over, he’d bring her to a sleazy by-the-hour motel, giving her the ol’ Munson magic and then, when she was in the shower or cleaning up in the bathroom, he’d bolt. Driving to the nearest gas station casino and spending whatever money the waitress had in her purse. 

He’d finally crawl back to Wayne’s when he was bone dry, claiming he was home “for good this time!” And how he, “just wanted to hangout with my boy!” 

Turns out the “hanging out” was going over to Neil’s and getting shitfaced drunk, bringing Eddie to tag along, to prove to his brother that he was a good dad. He failed to mention that Eddie would end up locked in Billy’s room until dawn. 

So no, getting laid wasn’t on Eddie’s mind right now. 

“I told Tommy H to leave you alone, told him I’d fuck his girlfriend again if I caught wind of him messing with you.” Billy said, shoving his chest out proudly. Maybe if he helped Eddie spread his wings, he’d stop getting picked on, but in Billy’s eyes, Eddie brought alot of it on himself sticking up for those fucking nerds he always hung out with. 

The Hargrove kitchen table was covered in the same paperwork they always were when Al came over. Weird haikus, and riddles that were partly solved, a timeline of when and where everything needed to take place, and lastly, a complete blueprint of Lonnie Byers’ house. 

Everything was just about set in stone, the only thing the men couldn’t figure out is why Creel had decided that it had to be Lonnie’s son as the baited sacrifice. And whenever they asked, Creel would say the same thing, “an eye for an eye.” 

—

1986

“Right here,” Steve said, pointing his hand in Eddie’s face and out the window to his big behemoth of a house. 

The kind of house that belonged to a homeowners society, telling you when, where, and how to water and mow your grass. Not the type of neighborhood that housed the brown piece of shit on wheels that was arriving into the Harrington driveway at record speeds. 

Steve fumbled with the door and had to pry Nancy away from the van, she was petrified, her body shaking and tense, beneath his arm. 

Eddie turns to you, tapping you gently on the shoulder and when you don’t move he guides your chin towards him, his heart breaking at the sight of your tear filled eyes. 

“I’m gonna keep you safe, okay?” His eyes were large and the worry on his face only made you more scared, but he tried to put on a brave face for you, “c’mon, we gotta get inside.” 

Steve’s home was decorated with expensive paintings and gold fixtures. The kind of decor that wasn't available at a mall but ordered from some lavish designer in New York. The living room had vacuum lines in the carpet, as if it were never used. The wood floors in the foyer sparkled from the overhead chandelier, it was a catalog home, looking as if it were staged for a photo 

shoot rather than people actually living in it. 

Nancy’s cries echoed loudly around the empty Harrington home, Steve scooped her up like an infant and carried her down the carpeted steps to the open basement. 

Eddie still wasn’t acting like himself, his eyes were clouded over with something you couldn’t pinpoint, plagued with grief? But you felt reassured when his fingers curled into the spaces between yours as you followed Steve and Nancy to the basement. 

—

NOVEMBER 9, 1983

“You working tonight?” Eddie asks at your locker, ringed fingers working over the corners of a Polaroid of you and him last summer when he tried to teach you how to skateboard. One of his favorite memories. 

“Nope,” you answer from deep inside your locker, looking for the crumbled history notes you swore you still had for todays test, emerging from the locker and hitting your head on the way out, “ow fuck! Nah I’m off tonight, Don closed since Joyce’s son has been gone, why what’s up?” 

Eddie shuts your locker and shifts his worn notebook to his other hand, “it’s Wednesday, the Hawk has free popcorn, thought maybe we could see a movie?”

It wasn’t weird for two friends to go to a movie together, you and Eddie had done it multiple times. Completely casual. Even if the heat from his fingers bumping against yours sent flutters to your stomach and he quickly moved his hand like you were a snake that had bit him, a blush forming on his cheeks. 

“What time?”

“I dunno, seven? Pick ya up at 6:30, that way we can stop and get snacks to sneak some snacks in to go with our free popcorn.” 

His boyish grin was the same from when you were kids, dimple dipped cheeks, and the darkest eyes twinkling with mischievous glee.

The door to Mr. Stanley’s Chem 210 was open and you stopped before going in the classroom to give Eddie your answer, “fine, but I want twizzlers.” 

—

“What the hell do you mean it’s not enough? We did exactly what you said, solved each fucking riddle!” 

The weathered boards of the Creel House groan as a screaming gust of wind slaps loud against the old home, the late winter storm rattled the wooden foundation and pelted the window panes with ice, pinging loudly with each large gale that forced its way through the cracks of the poorly maintained home.

A small fire crackled in the sunken fireplace, wafting dark plumes of smoke into the living room and ashing soot onto the cobweb covered furniture. 

“He makes the rules, I do not, I am simply a messenger, a ves—,” a tattered mitten hand cups around his mouth, acting as a poor excuse for a shield against a barking, wet cough. Lungs burning with each wheeze of oxygen leaving. He clears his throat when the fit is over, wiping his mouth with a moth bitten scarf around his sagging neck, leaving blood behind, “..vessel, I don’t make the rules, Neil.” 

“A what?” Al quizzes, shifting uncomfortably from his left leg to his right, “we delivered that kid exactly where you told us to! The whole town thinks he’s dead! Hawkins PD put out the report last night that a body was found by the quarry.” 

Creel pokes the fire with the blunt end of his cane, crumbling a reddened log into pieces, adding a wadded mass of newspaper, the face of Will Byers’ missing poster front and center, his cherub smile warping with the heated flame. 

“The boy is hiding somewhere. The creatures can not find him, he is convinced that there is help from our side.” 

“Impossible,” Al scoffed, rubbing the cold of his nose on his sleeve, “I just talked to Chief Hopper at the Hideaway last night, and according to him it’s a closed case, Lonnie and his former ol lady were making funeral arrangements.” 

“What you hear, and what you see, seem different ways to hold the key.”

“Enough with the psychological bullshit!” Neil yelled throwing his beer across the living room, “tell us what he needs from us.” 

The blackened tooth smile creeps onto Creel’s face his red chapped lips split and bleed, and he holds back his cough just long enough to whispers the same fallacy he was given only hours before, in another dimension identical to this one. 

“A son.” 

—

The wind was ripping snow across the streets of Hawkins. The windshield wipers on Eddie’s van had frozen in place, stopping half way in the middle of the windshield, the shitty wipers no match against the freezing, winter rain. 

You were certain that the seat belt in the passenger seat had never been used before tonight, but Eddie was insistent that you wore it, foregoing his own with a you’re kidding right? look. The whites of your knuckles shine bright with each overhead street lamp that dances lazily on the windshield, and Eddie looks over with a laugh.

“Almost there Pebs,” he mumbles, his mouth snug around the filter of a cigarette, a half smirk on his lips, “don’t worry.” 

The storm foiled more plans than just good driving conditions, apparently The Hawk had closed earlier that day when the windchill dipped down to the negatives, Sal ensuring that his employees had plenty of time to get home before the weather took a turn for the worst. Thankfully Family Video was still open, and Eddie’s trailer was empty for the night, save for a couple of beers in the fridge and the heat from an electric blanket. Apparently the manager of Family Video didn’t give a fuck about the roads, neither did the factory. 

You and Eddie were met with the rolling eyes of Steve Harrington as you two shoved each other out of the way to get into the door first, bringing with you a cold gust of wind and chattering teeth.  After securing The Poltergeist and two boxes of peanut M&M’s, you and Eddie were tucked into the tin can death trap on wheels, trekking slowly to Forest Hills Trailer Park. 

The bumpy driveway was nearly covered by the falling ice and snow, causing Eddie to slide into his parking spot, well the front yard, of trailer 8. Before he jiggles the key out of the ignition, a man’s shadow illuminated the front door, the burning end of a cigarette glowing on a presumed inhale, and Eddie mutters a ‘fuck’ under his breath.

“Stay here, okay?” He says with a shallow voice, his eyes never leaving the front door of the trailer, “I’ll be right back.”

What the hell was his dad doing at home this time? Maybe he was confused, thinking it was Thanksgiving already— probably wondering where the turkey and green bean casserole were. 

The door of the van groans as Eddie pushes it open with his shoe, slamming it shut and hearing the crinkle of built up ice breaking away from the frame. Ice was gathering in his hair as he scurried up the steps, the shadow moving away from the door so Eddie could come inside, and once the threshold was breached, he wasn’t surprised to see his dad standing in the kitchen, smoking a cigarette, long fingers wrapped around a can of Wayne’s breakfast PBR.

“There’s my boy,” Al greeted with a false tone of cheer laced in his voice, “only been waiting here for an hour, I need your help with somethin’.”

“Sorry,” Eddie mutters, shutting the door tight and shaking his hair free of the elements, “must have lost my schedule on your flight arrival.”

“Watch it,” Al snaps, his eyes are bloodshot and dark rimmed, voice gravelly, “I’m in no mood for your shit tonight, alright?”

Eddie tuts through his teeth and shoulder checks his old man before walking to the living room, pulling the cord from the wall jack, unplugging the tv. Holding it against his hip to bring it to his room.

“What the hell man, I was gonna watch that!” Al yells as Eddie trudges into his room, shoving shit off his dresser with a sweep of his arm, putting the small tv down he turns to find his dad right behind him, glaring menacingly at him, nose to nose. 

“The rabbit ears haven’t worked in months, guess you’ll have to go to Neil’s..”

His insult is cut short as Al grabs him by the lapels of his denim vest, shoving him into the closet door, busting it off the sliding track. 

“Listen to me you little fuck…” Al spits, literally into Eddie’s face, “I said I’m not in the mood for your shit tonight, ya got me? I need your fucking help for once in your life, can you manage that?” 

“Get off me,” Eddie sneers back, trying to hide the trembling in his jaw as he grits his teeth, “I’m serious.” 

I'm serious, Dad! Al mocks, shoving Eddie harder into the closet, the splintering wood busting beneath his shoulder blades. “I ain’t ever asked you for nothin’ in your whole damn life, let you live here with Wayne, no rules no nothin’ and now it’s time to pay up. I need a favor.” 

His eyes were shocking in a desperate way, anger riddling his irises. 

Eddie thinks fast to his underwear drawer, the wad of cash shoved into an old sock underneath a sticky playboy, “I don’t sell whatever you’re on, and I don’t have any cash.” 

“Ain’t about money, or horse, Eddie boy, you remember my friend, the one that lives in the old house on Morehead?” 

Eddie thinks back to all the “friends” Al had ever introduced him to. There was Bud the one who owned the bowling alley in Bridgeport that had a fake eye and an gnarly looking scar on his face from a dog bite, Willy Jack who helped take the plates off of the van and scratch up the VIN number when they stole it from that scrap yard north of town, he even painted it any color Eddie wanted, but somehow the friend he was talking about wasn’t registering. 

Raising an eyebrow, Eddie shakes his head no. “Doesn’t matter,” Al said all too quick, “his son has been missin’ see, for years, and we need your boys’ help finding him.” 

“Who’s we?” Eddie asks, finally wiggling free from his dads hands, straightening his jacket, “and why the fuck do I need to find him?” 

A closed fist breaks through the paneled wall next to his chin, “enough with the questions Eddie goddamnit! I need you on this, and you’re not gonna tell me ‘no’ you understand me?” 

Eddie had never hated his dad more than he did at this moment. If he were older he’d swing a fist into his gut, knock his lights out once and for all, but he didn’t dare, shoulders slumped and the weight of the world and all its guilt piled onto him. He had no idea what kind of shit his dad was getting him into, only the gut wrenching feeling that something was terribly wrong, and the only thing he could do was nod his head, agreeing to lend his trembling hand. 

Across town on Cherry lane, Neil Hargrove was having the same friendly little “discussion” with Billy, but the conversation was different, lighter, happier, and the two Hargrove men seemed to be on the same page for once in their lives. 

—

OCT. 1986

The Harrington’s basement was set up much like the Wheeler’s but on a grander scale. Large tv tucked behind an oak cabinet,, a beige leather couch that seemed to stretch across the entire living room area, a surround sound system in each corner,  two bedrooms and a full bathroom. Setting Nancy down on the plus couch and covering her small form with a wool blanket, Steve opens a closet door and wrangles out a new set of golf clubs, leaning them against the wall, and running his hair through his fingers, as if he’s trying to make a mental list of household objects that could be used as a weapon. 

The phone rings noisily in one of the bedrooms and Steve leaves to answer it. 

Eddie still has your fingers between his, his rings leaving small indents but you don’t mind, it’s a comfort. He’s muttering to himself, in a tone only he can hear, biting the nails on his right hand with grinding clicks of his teeth. Looking at you his expression falters for a split second, trying to put on a calming mask, nonchalant-like even though inside he was screaming. 

It wouldn’t be long before the Demodogs came, especially if the Demogorgons were out, would he be looking for him? Wondering where he has been? Why he’s been gone? 

He guides you to the couch, a grand gesture with his nail bitten hand, grabbing a blanket and putting it around you. 

Steve emerges from the back bedroom, a tiny bit of relief in his eyes, “that was Robin, they’re on their way here, I guess they barely made it out.” 

You wince at the thought of everyone dead at the carnival, the way Argyle’s body was ripped to shreds, the howling cackle from Creel, the way he stood with his arms in a welcoming hug, just an hour ago you were convinced you were going to kiss your best friend, now the majority of Hawkins was dead. 

Steve turns to Eddie, with wide searching eyes, fumbling for the right words but failing, “I need answers man, right now.” 

—

Robin hangs up the phone, blood drying on her fingers from when she tripped over the gaping carcass of Tammy Thompson, her face covered with streaks of dirt and god knows what else, “ Let’s go! Everyone’s at St—”

A stinging in her spine brings heat, warm and dripping, then fiery hot, a hand on her shoulder she turns to see his maniacal eyes, the blood from the gash on his head now trickling into his mouth, white pearls stained in ruby. 

“I did you a solid Rob, killed that bitch for you—didn’t even think twice about it, because we’re friends,”  blood now trickling down her back into the waist of her scoops ahoy uniform shorts, she garbles a breath cusping on the breath of a question. 

“shh,” he reassures, wiping tears from her freckles lined cheeks, extracting the knife from the well in her back, he helps her lie down gently, “this isn’t going to kill you, it’s just temporary you see? I can’t have any distractions, I can’t let you get in my way, but don’t worry!”

 He moves to rip the phone cord from its hook, “I’ve done so much research on this meticulously studying over books on ways to cut the human body, what would hurt the worst, the least, the angle of the knife  was just right, I guess I could be wrong,” he scratches his head, the whites of his eyes rolling as the smell of blood starts to work him up, an ache he can’t scratch, “hmm… take care, yeah? I’ll be back.” 

A pool of blood blossoms from Robin’s back, flowing into the blue carpet fibers of her room��� in tandem with the slow blink of her eyelashes meeting. 

The ignition of his car engine backfires with a gunshot noise, the bloody knife he used to kill the others laid gently on the leather of his passenger seat. 

Driving down the desolate streets of Hawkins, he looks in the rearview mirror, and for the first time, Jonathan Byers likes what he sees. 

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[overgrown3d]

Messages from your person 🫂 (PAC)

💭What do they have in their mind? What words have they left unsaid? What is something they want to tell you the most, be it about love, gratitude, and friendship? !REMINDER! This is a general reading, take what resonates.

✨How to select your pile?✨

1. Slow your breathing, taking deep inhales. Focus on feeling present in your environment.

2. Looking from left to right, use your intuition to pick the pile meant for you (what you connect most with.)

3. Doesn't resonate? No worries! Pick another, it's message may be just right for you.

!!For Entertainment Purposes Only!!

Pile 1 -> Pile 2

Pile 3 -> Pile 4

🔹Pile 1 ;

Cards: The Hermit (rev), The Sun, King of swords (rev), 9 of swords, 10 of wands, 8 of swords

"Dear Pile 1,

There are so many things in my head that I want to say, but I struggle to say them. I feel so burdened with responsibilities and tasks, I am not the lover I want to be, I am not the person that I so badly need to be. I'm in a dark place right now, and it feels like I'm doing the wrong things to get through it. What I need the most is to step up for myself, to find peace and confidence. There are nights where I am kept awake, and days where I am kept moving. I'm sorry, I feel like I disappointed you, and I disappointed myself. Truth is, what I need is help. Carrying my burdens alone, I don't think I can make it out of here."

🌊~~~~

Alright, that was really depressing 🥲. Pile 1, this person feels trapped right now. Daily responsibilities can be taking a toll on them right now, I also heard that they aren't meeting expectations? They have pretty bad self esteem, undermining themselves despite all the work they do. I'm getting that this person is pretty impressive in how much they can handle. But right now, they are at their limits, they can't take anymore. A lot of their feelings of being "trapped" are their own insecurities, they have a lot of things in their mind that they can't control. Honestly, it's like they know they need to focus on themselves more, but their daily schedule and habitual thoughts don't allow for that change to come smoothly. I'm getting that they just need help to go through these things, they don't want to be alone. They do have a lot of things to say, but it's like they're not in a space where they can voice their thoughts out. Maybe it's also their role that they are considering.

If you chose this pile with your FS in mind, this is most likely where they are right now in life, or could be the same energy when the two of you meet.

🔹Pile 2;

Cards: Page of Wands, The Devil, Strength, The Hanged Man, 10 of swords, 6 of Cups, 10 of Cups

"Dear Pile 2,

You really changed me, you let me see the light in my future way beyond what I could've ever imagined. I never thought I could have my own happily-ever-after, but I learned that it wasn't too impossible in the first place. I'm so grateful for the new experiences you brought me, and experiences we went through together. I was able to learn a lot from you, like being introduced to spiritual concepts, and having more faith in the divine. I'm making the steps to change my life for the better, with newfound strength. I appreciate you for these new insights."

🌊~~~~

Pile 2, your person mentions you a lot in this reading. There is a lot of emphasis on their gratitude towards you, and whatever you've done, it really helped them open up to a new experience or thought patterns. Like, they have a lot of confidence in creating a future for themselves, and are enthusiastic to be walking down that path. Perhaps you gave them advice, or commented on how they can process their trauma and emotions, maybe even introduced them to Tarot, Astrology, Meditations, etc. They now adopt this in their lifestyle, and it's greatly serving them to the point where they give you a bunch of credit for it haha. Habits are standing out to me here, they could've been the type of person to really struggle with temptations & being lazy, but now they're psyched to start acting. I'm heavily feeling like you helped them break old patterns and gave them hope. You kinda changed the trajectory of their life. They think it's thanks to you, and want you to know it!

🔹Pile 3 ;

Cards: The hanged man, 6 of swords, the tower, the hermit, king of words, queen of wands, the star, 4 of swords, 4 of pentacles

"Dear Pile 3,

Life has been pretty good lately. I feel in control of things like my thoughts and emotions. They don't go haywire anymore, haha. I'm not leading the life I used to. I'm doing better each day with all this healing and stuff. I'm focusing a lot on resting, trying to build up my assets, and mature a whole lot more. Life has been steady, and I'm slowly rebuilding it. I'm lucky to have another chance at life, and I'll be sure not to waste it."

🌊~~~~

Your pile is different from 1 & 2! This message is addressed to you in the form of a check-in letter. I'm getting the vibe that this is a relationship where you aren't closely in contact right now, or interactions could happen occasionally. This honestly feels like they are telling you not to worry about them, since their life is going pretty well right now. This person could've been in a bad place before, which justifies you having worries about their life, but low-key they're kinda thriving lmao! They seem to be in a steady and good place, probably a drastic comparison to their past or how you first met them. Their life is in the process of balancing right now (though it can be that they are financially struggling), but this is more of their headspace being balanced. They're pretty zen, which might come up as a legitimate shock lol. You most likely were included in their old life somehow, enough for them to want to update you on their life.

🔹Pile 4 ;

Cards: 6 of wands, 2 of Cups, queen of cups, 4 of cups, 5 of cups, 5 of wands, page of cups

"Dear Pile 4,

I've been at a loss, and I know it's in my best interest to put things behind me. I still grieve, grieving over many things. Among the many, is the past. Nonetheless, I move on -- I'm still learning and growing. I know I'm not lacking in support, I have you among other things. There are days where I'm not sure how to pinpoint my emotions, inside of me are inner conflicts at times. It's a battle I'm going through, but do believe that after trial and error, it's one that I'll win."

🌊~~~~

Pile 4, this person cares so much about you. Honestly, it's tempting to say that this is romantic, but it honestly applies to platonic relationships given the context. They have a lot of care for you, so much so that they want to be emotionally open about these things. To them, you're their rock, their shoulder to cry on. You're the Queen of Cups while they're the Page. Honestly, you help this person process their emotions, because I'm seeing that they greatly benefit through having you around in tough times. From the 2 of Cups, this is definitely a union, energy is heavily pointing to this being a close connection. This person may be overcoming a loss, hence the help you provide. Arghhh it's like they want to improve themselves not just for their sake, but also yours. They want to move together as a team, but they feel that they need to develop themselves emotionally still. They do want to let you know of their appreciation, but it's like this is something they want to do alone, this will be their own victory.

🌊~~~ You reached the end of the reading, 'till next time!