#twitter drama making me do some actual reflection....i do not like it

[misclogarts]

i think i like ptn's gray mirror event so much because it reflects how genuinely weird online culture is and how it can bleed into and affect reality (ultra long ramble in the tags. it cuts off abruptly because i hit the tag limit unwittingly and tumblr didn't warn me beforehand 😭👍)

[somenerdfromwhatever]

Dear Parents who think disowning their kids are cool

Hi. Apparently I still have this. It’s cool, I’m going to use it for my long thought pieces anyway. Regarding recent events in the LGBT community scene, namely Vivian, a trans-girl going against her dad, Elon Musk himself, I reflected a lot on a question I asked onto Reddit recently (I know I know Reddit sucks but it got me thinking):

Why are some parents so okay with disowning trans kids when they gave birth to them?

This is a pretty tough question with some pretty rough answers, but after seeing the shit I saw last week and now, something has to be said on the matter. Content warning because we're dealing with heavy hitting topics like abandonment, and family drama. Also content warning for what I am about to present because, well, I'm pissed.

It is no secret why I bought the Vivian and Elon Musk thing up to tackle this question as having a billionaire shit talk their own kin that they gave birth to is sickening and inhumane. Heck even before his venture into buying Twitter, he was constantly berating her for just being her own genuine self. Heck in her thread on Threads, her father was a massive deadbeat to her. Unsupportive and hostile who wasn’t there in her life all because her crime was being herself. It’s sad isn’t it? This is one of the most wealthiest humans on the planet mind you, the guy that can end world hunger, have massive funds to pool into medical care to accelerate a cure to cancers, but instead he chooses to defame, harass, and downright abuse his own child for being their true self. And given the recent lights of Elon being a dead beat, I also say in my opinion, he just left her to die. He bought Twitter under the guise of fighting censorship, but yet only to impose his own narrow worldview on others to fuel his slander to his own kin. This hypocrisy is disturbing given recent events as he was fighting for the very thing he fought against.

It’s not just the LGBT community, does anyone else remember that mom from an Autism Speaks documentary about how she wanted to commit a murder-suicide on her daughter just for being autistic? Her name was Alison Singer. A name all too well in the community when discussing neurodiversity and programs that don’t speak for us. You also have the case of Kelli Stapleton who ACTUALLY DID IT.

You also have parents like the ones from Toddlers and Tiaras, where Carly developed a spilt personality disorder thanks to their own MOM because Carly loathed being forced into competitions. Heck I even grew up with the whole DaddyOFive situation where Mike abused Cody. So now the question becomes this:

Why are parents willing to disown their children for being who they are? And regardless of their differences, why would they do that when they are the ones who gave them the life to live on this planet?

And with the rise of LGBT hate, disability hate, it seems like every difference a human makes can make a parents cut ties with them in a heartbeat. With no answer in sight, I might as well make one.

Now, look. What I’m going to address next is harsh, but it’s a reality that every parent needs to accept.

If you are pregnant, and you gave birth to a kid, as newfound parents, that child you are holding in your hand is not your property. They are their own soul, and you better let them be their own soul. They have one life to live on this planet, make their moments count. If you toss them aside, berate them, and even disown because you can't handle differing ideologies, interests, etc. don't call yourself a parent. A parent by definition is being there for your children. A parent who tosses them aside over them being different no matter how or what isn’t a parent at all. And parents who disown them, and kick them out... well. I consider them brain-dead murderers, as they are tossing their kin out to die in society. Yep, I'm going there. Parents who disown and kick their kids out to fend for themselves in society (which they all die too sadly) are murderers.

So what if they express their identity?! So what if they have disabilities they grew up with?! So what?! You still gave birth to them! You lead and support them! And YOU need to give your next of kin independency and not turn them into a slave you can mold in YOUR IMAGE.

This is the TRUE PRO-LIFE STANCE. The actual truth to being PRO-LIFE. To be PRO-LIFE, you have to be PRO-CHOICE as the truth about PRO-CHOICE is letting a human appreciate how they want to live their life and appreciating their own say on the matter. To put it in words that are easier to understand, I inputted this mombo jumbo into GPT to explain it in Caveman:

To support life, you must let people choose how they live. Respect their choice and let them decide. That is true PRO-LIFE.

How is that a hard concept to understand? Like seriously? My parents support my career path to becoming involved heavily in post-production! Heck I'm still on that goal and still dreaming on working on my favorite show on Netflix, Wednesday! They were surprised back when I was a pre-teen about to be heading to high school for this to happen! I was a kid who loves to hold camcorders, a kid who edited a YouTube Poop which landed me into a one-day suspension from school, and a kid who loved making these every day. My parents accepted me for who I was especially since I grew up with autism and it was a new thing TO THEM. Heck even with my Wednesday video gaining traction, my Mom accepted me for being non-binary! So you tell me then, answer me the following: Do you think for just a second that you're doing the right thing by throwing kids like us out? Do you think you're justified in abandoning your own flesh and blood just because they don't fit into your narrow-minded ideals? Newsflash: you're not. You're failing at the most basic level of parenthood. You brought a life into this world; you don't get to just walk away when things get tough or when your child's identity challenges your beliefs. I never watched the Saw movies, but I do seen the complexities of the character John Kramer, the infamous Jigsaw killer. Say what you want, but is he wrong about how we should appreciate life?

To appreciate life, it's means to value all life. All HUMAN life, including the individuality and identity of the next generation. Whether it's your kid you birthed, or a kid passing by, the fact is they are their own soul. You don't control other people's souls, you have to appreciate their own life by their own choices. It's this freedom to be themselves. Letting children grow into their true selves.

Parents, your role if you birth a kid is so straightforward it is astounding how you ignore this.

This isn't about you. I've been on this planet for 25 years now. 25 years. We get it, parenting is hard. My parents had to adapt with my autistic video making non-binary self. They supported everything that I do. You chose to bring a child into this world. You owe them love, support, and acceptance UNCONDITIONALLY. Anything less is a failure on your part, not theirs, YOURS. Disowning your child is the ultimate act that makes you no different then a murderer who kills people just for being different. It's choosing your comfort over their happiness. I would never leave any next generation of mine out to die, and I will accept who they are no matter what they are regardless of interest, disabilities, and identity. I also find it hilarious when this happens, they happened to label them as groomers. Last I checked, the definition of it on every dictionary is "to make (someone) ready for a specific objective". (Verb Definition 3a on Webster's Dictionary for example) Sure it has been co-opted with the abusive nature, but the original definition set is stone is forcing someone onto a specific act. So if you disown a kid for not conforming to your standards on the basis of identity or something else, remember that you, in fact, are the one trying to "groom" them into your image. And if your kid is LGBT, well, that is telling on yourself at this rate, because under this logic and definition that's been there since the dawn of time... you, the parent who disowned them, are the real groomers here and the kids you raised are doing as you said, protecting themselves from groomers like you. You excuse and shift blame onto other people when you are the living definition of it raising your kid in your own image instead of living their own lives. And yes. I fucking said it. It deserves to be said. I stand by this notion.

In this current climate, where LGBT hate is on the rise and intolerance is being amplified by those in power, it's more crucial than ever for parents to stand up and protect their children. And if you are a kid and your parents are like this, abusing you, grooming you into their own perfect image, call them out, because this toxic generational trauma has to end. The world is already a harsh and dangerous place for anyone who doesn't fit into the so-called 'norm.' Take it from me, a neurodivergent who has to mask just to get through. Imagine how much worse it becomes when the very people who are supposed to love and protect you turn their backs on you. Oh to all those deadbeat parents I mentioned, Mike Martin (DaddyOFive), Elon Musk, Kelli Stapleton, Alison Singer, and others. Yeah they are hitmakers, advocates, and superstars in their minds, but to end it with a familiar Kendrick Lamar lyric, they are "fucking deadbeat that should never say more life."

I hope you read that Kendrick Lamar lyric well, because if you disown your kids just for being who they are, you shouldn’t say you’re “for the kids”.

I beg you parents of old and new, please take these words seriously. No kid would ever want a parent like that.

Good night.

[memes-in-a-half-shell]

Hallo 🙋‍♀️

I realize I haven't posted here in quite some time!!

Am I braindead? Always 💅 Am I abandonning this fandom? No, simply taking a mental break 🙆‍♀️ What's up? I'm in Baldur's Gate 3 brainrot hell and I'm LIVING FOR IT. 💃 (I shitpost a lot on Twitter)

I've straightened up a lot of priorities in the last few months: - Commissions are now forever closed. No more. Never. Nada. I am absolutely done with it. The last few ones I did over the last few months made me realize that I do not enjoy drawing for others anymore unless it's for shits and giggles, or a trade with friends. (no, do not try to be my friend to get free art. been there, done that)

- I am revisiting my deep love for medieval fantasy stuff. That is where I've always felt more creative and generally inspired. The last few drawings I did and texts I've written really reflect that. (I do plan on continuing some of my tmnt fics tho, that's for sure)

- I do not see the need to push content as much over the years. I am satisfied with doing things for myself, and frankly I've been gaining less and less traction over time because of how sporadically I post in general. The internet is really strange now with its algorithms and views and "for you" pages, etc. BLEHRG. If people find my stuff and like it, good for them. Otherwise, I post for myself or just don't post at all 🤷‍♀️ as long as I'm happy, that's what matters.

- Not gonna lie, I'm also doing this to prepare myself mentally to not be so dependant of the internet and having my sole source of happiness come from it. My partner and I have some plans for the future - some which involve actually starting a family - so I know the internet cannot be a priority.

- My career is taking a lot of twists and turns. I am more involved in the video game development sphere and I'm aiming for roles up high in management. Things are moving fast this year and I might get where I want to be sooner than later. That is going to take a lot of my time and energy. So any free time I have, I want it to be for ME.

So uhhhhhhh, that's the big lines I guess. I see lots of drama on the internet and I will have none of that. I'll stay in my bubble and enjoy my stuff however I want. I'll post stuff to make people laugh 'cause the world is so ugly and sad these days. We need some sunshine 💜

Love you all 💜

[codecurucho]

I have some thoughts about cc!Forever’s apology, specifically the choices he made while scripting his response, so if you’re not here for that, please keep yourself safe and skip this post

Obviously a massive tw for pedophilic comments

A few things struck me in the video he uploaded to Twitter, bear in mind I don’t speak Portuguese so take this all with a pinch of salt

Things I believe he did purposefully:

The use of photos to convey how old he was/how much he’s changed: creating a degree of separation between himself currently and “that other person who did that stuff”

The implication that “Twitter drama” forced his friends to cut ties instead of the likely possibility of them not wanting to associate with someone who made flirty comments to minors, regardless of if they were friends.

The use of the montage. This use of “happier times” could be chosen to rile up the little supporters he has left, and guilt the people who are currently advocating for him to leave the server

The terminology he used which I found interesting (NOTE: this is coming from his translation and may not be fully accurate to the meanings in Portuguese):

“Cancellation” to minimise what he was accused of to “Twitter drama”

repitition of time passed: “2016”, “20 years old” and “8 years ago” once again minimising its impact because of time passed

“kicked out of the qsmp” instead of what most companies (Quackity studios) would choose “leaving the qsmp” to imply it was amicable. “Kicked” shows it was unwilling.

Things I believe he did right by this apology:

Stating his regret. Actually apologising and acknowledging, to some degree, that what he did was wrong

Acknowledging victims and people he has triggered

Discouraging hate, to other members or to himself. No one deserves death threats to their families or themselves

Rationalising and giving context to his actions before this point: explaining his headspace when deleting all those tweets and when he made legal threats on stream. Actually retracting those comments (I think?).

Do I believe he had help with this apology? Yes. I think, after all his legal threats, he ended up getting a lawyer who maybe co-wrote this apology to make sure it reflected him the best way it could.

I’m not making this post to stir up drama, I want to state I am not a supporter of Forever anymore, I just made this because I noticed some of the common YouTube apology traits and pattern recognition is my thing™️.

I’m not claiming he used these tactics maliciously or purposely, just stating that he is using them in this apology.

[tetsunabouquet]

I cannot wait to see Ruby Gillman: Teenage Kraken no matter the mixed reviews and numerous spoilers. I'm thinking of going this weekend to the cinema. This, is for a very important reason:

Chelsea Van Der Zee, is the reason. When I initially saw pictures of her, I was hyped to see how DreamWorks is going to poke fun at the live-action remakes. Because come on, production of this movie started 2 years after the announcement of the live-action Little Mermaid. BUT, there is another layer to the parody of her character that will fly over most people's heads: She's a Dutch mermaid. Her faux-Dutch last name is a proper sounding Dutch surname, it doesn't falls into the pitfalls of writing it as Vanderzee, and whilst on the nose it's a well-constructed surname. Like, the people who created her last name were aware of HOW our surnames were constructed and didn't end up creating a non-realistic surname that simply sounds Dutch like Gossip Girl did. I remember trying to playback a moment in the trailer several times, when Chelsea confronted Ruby about being a kraken in the trailer, she says a word at the end that I couldn't place and no matter how many times I rewinded it I didn't understood what she said. Until I came across the scripted version of the quote yesterday; “I know your secret. You're a kraken, hiding as a human. And soon, everyone will know the truth. Kusjes!” Kusjes is horribly butchered, but it's Dutch for 'kisses' and we actually do use that and XOXO, just like English speakers do so the usage of Dutch that I have seen so far is correct. Now, I have actually seen people speculate she's Dutch because of That's So Raven, but as a Dutch person myself I see it from a different angle: There's a phenomenon I like to call the 'Dutch Default'. Historically, the English had difficulties recognizing which Germanic speaking culture was which. You can even see this reflected in our English name, 'Dutch', when that's how the Germans refer to themselves, as the Deutsch. We calls ourselves Nederlanders in our tongue. Pennsylvanian Dutch? I was told the area was mostly Swedish. I can continue with examples. Whilst I noticed the UK has became a little better educated about the topic, this is still perpetuated by Americans to this day. When The Little Mermaid live action was announced, there were various people who actually confused us for the Danish. Some were harmless comments like calling the novel Dutch instead of a Danish novel. Others were not. When there were Danish people speaking on social media about how disappointed they were with how Disney treats one of their national symbols, there were hate comments from people defending The Little Mermaid, but various were directed at the Dutch because Americans were too lazy to even Google which culture they are hurling insults too. This, was all taking place during the production of Ruby Gillman. Now, how likely is it that Chelsea is a Dutch mermaid because of That's So Raven, and how likely do you think DreamWorks noticed Twitter and decided to use the Dutch Default as another layer to the parody of Chelsea's character? Because it's not like the entirety of Hollywood seems to be unaware of this phenomenon. The Umbrella Academy S2, actually has this scene with the Swedish brothers being called Dutch even though the characters were already told they were Swedish, and Five corrects them like, "No, they're Swedish." Paired with how Luther shouts at innocent Olga through the phone, it gives a perfect portrayal of how clueless Americans are about foreign cultures. There are people in Hollywood who do notice how little Americans know about other cultures and will harass innocent people on false misconceptions. For DreamWorks to poke fun at Twitter wars for doing so, makes me love Chelsea Van Der Zee.

If I ever see one of those stupid Americans again because this whole drama isn't completely over yet, I will summon Chelsea to drown them to the bottom of the Ocean.

[yukidragon]

I always wonder about the time-line in mafia au with Bo and Jack

I know in aphrodesia they have cellphones but what about the mafia au?

What year do you think it is?

I think the year itself is meant to be ambiguous for Aprhodesia, as well as the other series by SnaccPop Studios. That's likely why we don't get exact ages for the male leads in their bios, and only Jack is given a birth year due to the year of his death playing an important part of the story.

I'll admit I don't know a lot about the lore of Aphrodesia yet, but I do know it definitely takes place in an alternate version of Earth. There's a lot of fantastical and sci-fi elements, including robots and angels becoming crime bosses in the city of St. Valen's. I don't think it's meant to really reflect our Earth's timeline, but instead be its own thing based off aesthetics, kind of like fantasy worlds tend to be based off of medieval aesthetics.

In that spirit, I don't bother trying to give the Mafia AU an actual year. This is an alternate Earth, with alternate events that mean the timeline as we know it on our world no longer really applies.

I mean, the clothing that Bo and Jack wear in the original piece of art Sauce made that started this AU is pretty timeless, in my opinion.

Isn't it so nifty? Full credit to Sauce as always for their stunning art and being cool with me using them in my rambles. In the spirit of supporting them and the rest of the team who makes such awesome visuals and ideas for us to play with, why not consider joining the SnaccPop Studios patreon? There's a whole bunch of artwork there that you can only see by joining.

Remember, don't share anything privately posted on the patreon. Doing that only hurts the team. Instead, just encourage others to sign up as well, or just spread word about these fun games and audio dramas they're making.

Anyway, this picture, as I recall, was inspired by this comic drawn by Rain over on twitter. As you can see, it's a different sort of crossover, but it has the same vibe of the Mafia AU.

Sauce then did something of a genre swap with their characters. Here we have Jack and Bo as a crime boss and wise guy respectively in an Aphrodesia-esque setting. This picture's sister image was Jambee wearing a kids-show appropriate thief costume, complete with a black and white striped shirt and domino mask, as if he was an antagonist character to the SunnyTime Crew.

While this AU is a crossover between Something's Wrong with Sunny Day Jack, DachaBo, and Aphrodesia, I don't worry too much about sticking close to whatever timeline any of the three actually have, or their original continuities. This crossover is about being inspired by some stylish art and letting whatever urge feels fun to me when it comes to pulpy mafia crime drama indulgence, with a nice splash of sci-fi and fantasy elements thrown on top.

As such, the timeline itself isn't all that set in stone yet. Even the original ramble's timeline of events when it comes to Alice's influence on the world isn't completely solid, as expanding the King family's lore changed some things in this follow up post. This universe, as well as its timeline, is very much a work in progress.

Also it's an excuse to have Jack be touch starved and need to have very intimate (and especially spicy) contact with his sunshine as often as possible.

In essence, the year is modern day, only modern day in this world isn't the same as our world. We have cell phones, computers, and the internet, but also some classy retro-style aesthetics for clubs and the like. Or at least that's how it is in my version of this AU. Others might take it a different way.

On that note, why don't I give a shout out to some of my fellow artists who have also played with this particular crossover?

Glassy Shards over on twitter has a really cool take on this AU, giving Bo this creepy "glitch" ability that allows him to no clip through realities. Her take on Bo is pretty creepy and intense, as you can see in this delightful art here and here.

Fun fact: it was actually Glassy's audio dramas that made me inclined to have Bo be more promiscuous, violent, and rebellious in my version of the Mafia AU. The audio dramas are really well done, which makes sense considering she was Bo's original VA. I suggest giving them a listen here, here, and here if you want to hear Bo be a very scary alpha on the hunt.

Lilith Rose on twitter made a fun comic, which really pops in her colorful and distinct art style. It's just another day in the city of St. Valens with some goons getting pummeled, and Bo falling for his puppy. Check it out here, here, here, here, here, and here. Oh, and a cute piece of art that isn't part of the comic, but Bo in suspenders and Lilith in a dancer outfit are just so cute.

CheriiHoney on twitter and here on tumblr also has an adorable comic for this crossover. Jack is lovestruck, and Bo is just dumbstruck. There's also this very delightfully spicy follow up picture of Jack being so yandere for his sunshine and Bo is still annoyed by his boss, hahaha.

I'm sure there's plenty more takes on this crossover out there. If you have any favorites I missed, feel free to tell me in a reblog. Also, consider checking out these awesome artists and leaving a kind word or two. It was Cherii's birthday yesterday, so you could also consider giving her a belated happy birthday as well.

One thing that always tickles me about this AU is how much we've inspired one another when adding to it. It's almost like a community project. Rain inspired Sauce who inspired so many others. We're paying it forward artistically, which is why I wanted to shout out so many of my fellow artists in this post who have given me so much inspiration. You're all awesome. Keep on creating. 💖

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur @kurokrisps

[g-oblincat]

The other manga I've been keeping up with that recently just ended! And I'm going to talk about it!

Ayaka-chan wa Hiroko-senpai ni Koishiteru (Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko!) by Sal Jiang

A lesbian office drama written by a Twitter artist I really like! Ayaka has a crush on her senior at work, Hiroko, and constantly tries to make Hiroko notice her. Hiroko is a lesbian who’s closeted at work and trying her hardest not to fall for Ayaka, who she thinks is an oblivious straight girl. The appeal is the comedy of watching two women made stupid by love freak out over each other, underlined by queer angst.

Things I like about it:

Charming characters! The main couple is SO easy to fall in love with and root for- they are so earnest and funny and have great chemistry. It also doesn’t hurt that they’re drawn REALLY well with fun, expressive faces and cute designs.

Themes of queerness as identity and community! More in the spoiler section, but my favorite scenes in this story take place in in a gay bar with a character’s WLW friendgroup as they talk about being gay. The community is my favorite part of being queer and I never see it reflected in manga, and I love how much fun and love is put into the scenes with the friendgroup.

You can read the official English comic online here! I think this is the most affordable I’ve ever seen a manga actually, so it’s definitely worth a buy! I will admit I am using the Dynasty Scans pages in the spoiler section of this post, since that’s the version I read before finding out about the official English version.

Expanding on my two points above in the spoilers section!

Time for the section where I play show and tell

That’s the premise!

Great characters and chemistry

Ayaka is SO cute. I love pretty femme girls who are kind of bratty, and she’s portrayed in a way where you know the author’s having so much fun with her.

Some random out of order/context Ayaka faces from the earlier chapters! I forgot how cute and sweet she comes off in the earlier chapters, she’s a total goblin later lol

Hiroko is also such a fun character! I love the contrast between a really serious, straight laced, determined-to-not-fall-in-love person at work to uhhhhh womanizer at night lol.

Speaking of fun, a character interaction trope I’ll never get tired of are “characters who comedically overreact when they’re in love with someone” and that fits this couple to a T!

What a cute sequence….

Both characters’ POVs from the same chapter. Hiroko focusing on how hot Ayaka is, and Ayaka imagining wedding bells when Hiroko looks at her LOL.

I could keep showing screenshots of these two until I basically go through the entire comic lol.

But even outside the main two, I really like the side characters as well! A standout is Risa - Ayaka’s colleague who’s also a baby gay and has a crush on her. I’m unusual in that I usually like love triangles, but I do think this one is written really well! She’s sympathetic, her doomed longing for Ayaka is delicious and relatable. (Spoilers) I love how her selfishness and selflessness is balanced- her crush and competition with Hiroko makes her sabotage Ayaka’s crush in small ways in the beginning, but she fundamentally cares for her friend and roots for them in the end. Also, (BIG SPOILERS) she and Ayaka end up dating and breaking up but still remain friends, which is another favorite trope of mine. (HUGE SPOILERS) I love this page, any manga that includes a scene like this is top tier for me…. She feels realistic and her story is really sweet!

(Left) Baby gays smashing braincells against each other and (Right) Risa’s eyes wander….

Queer community and identity

This section has more spoilers than the last one!! If you haven’t read this comic but plan on it, I recommend you not read this part!!

In my last post, I said that Yuri as a genre doesn’t need to have anything about queerness as an identity to be good, but then I realized that most of my favorites did have a focus on identity…. Yeah IDK what to say LOL. But the identity aspect is a big plot point/theme of this story, and it’s written SUPER well.

First of all- Hiroko’s backstory centers on homophobia and her being super closeted at her workplace. I’m iffy on homophobia stories (just cause I’ve read a lot of them and they tend to hit on the same points), but the homophobia theme leads to one of my fav scenes:

Context: Risa knows Hiroko is closeted and rants about it to the bartender at a lesbian bar who knows Hiroko.

I love this focus on how queer people interact with the straight world, and the generational divide between older and younger queers. I can only speak from a US perspective, but progress around LGBTQ acceptance has come so far and so fast the past few years that if I was born a few years earlier or a few years later, I’d have a radically different life experience. It’s something I think about a lot when reading memoirs and articles by older queer people, and contrasting that with my life and the observed lives of people younger than me online. This theme is explored well in this story- the cultural tensions between Hiroko and Ayaka and Risa, how straight people may react more positively to queer people now but it’s still not perfect, and how Hiroko has changed her workplace for the better.

Also speaking of the lesbian bar- I love the girls at the bar lol. Right after the scene with Risa, a gaggle of lesbians come in and comfort her and it’s SOOOO heartwarming and cute. I love how this friendgroup is written- supportive, but also will call you out.

It’s so fun to read these guys gossip, give each other relationship advice, bicker with each other, and be horny at women together.

Hiroko’s relationship with the girls is more bickering, but Risa and Ayaka end up going to them for advice a lot which is so sweet and the elder/baby queer relationship I need (not portrayed because I can’t find a screenshot that doesn’t reveal a big plot twist)

Anyway…that’s it…. If you’ve read this comic please talk to me about it…if you haven’t please read it. Thank you.

[edvinception]

I hope you don’t mind me sharing since this might fuel more unwarranted drama but I wanted to share some thoughts — from Felicia deleting her twitter account and looking at the pics from monaco, I feel really sad for her. I think the (v unnecessary) hate is beginning to take a toll on her. She (and Edvin kinda?) look pretty sad or at least despondent from what I have seen from pics/videos.

From everything we have learned from YR, re: Simon’s storyline and how he received hate from sm, it just feels so fucking meta and I know it’s not the fandom as a whole, but the hate does seem louder now that the show is over - I wish people could just be more empathetic or reflective. Like she has been w Edvin for a while now && is actually pretty fucking quiet about it (if i were her, i would totally only post about my relationship more & shove it in people’s face just to be petty but she’s more mature than me lmao) and yet people have trouble separating fiction from reality??

Like her, E, and O are all friends and yet people try to make her into some type of villain??? The internalized misogyny (since most who are spewing hate identify as women I think …) is unreal. And I know even using that as an argument will be considered an attack…

I mean what outcome do people want? Why can’t people just accept and move on??

Sorry for the long message - I feel so much empathy for E and F since I think he might feel guilty since it does seem now that he is on the rise to fame, people will always find a way to hate his partner. It’s with every male actor/celeb w a large fan base and it’s disgusting. I hope he and F have a good support system and ignore the white noise from social media echo chamber.

I agree with everything you say.

But also, I think they are okay, obviously getting hate on a daily basis is gonna take a toll on you but I think they have become good at distancing themselves from it, even before taking a step back.

That's not to say that this behaviour is okay by any means no matter how hard people try to justify their behaviour or claim it's all fair. It's really not and deep down they know it. Or they will grow up and be embarrassed when they lool back at their behaviour.

They are in the wrong, there's no buts, no excuses, nothing to legitimate it. But there's no reason to discuss or reason.

Just know that they are still in a minority and they seemingly have a lot of issues. One day they are gonna be like "yikes" at themselves. And if they won't then that's even more of a yikes because jfc what kind of a person are you.

[jxnisnotfunny]

(long post ahead. sorry if anything i say is wrong. please, respectfully, correct me where necessary)

btw i'm not reblogging anything regarding yesterday's fiasco on twitter of motaz and bisan being called out as antiblack.

the bisan part of it was made up with zero evidence by the person on twitter who wanted to stop """supporting""" palestine as soon as possible. literally, they straight up pulled it out of their ass and hit send tweet.

as for the motaz part however, there was a video of what he said, but it's still being questioned whether the video was actually antiblack or not (sudanese people- being a group of black people- have the right to say what is and isn't antiblack. hope that helps). however, motaz nonetheless apologized in this tweet and clarified the situation, to which an ACTUAL sudanese person (who btw is currently still being harassed for claiming what motaz said was antiblack) has forgiven him in a quote tweet.

this strike was supposed to be better than last time... flooding the timelines with information and uplifting palestinian voices (and the voices of others undergoing genocides in their countries, like sudan), not starting unnecessary drama. i'm saying this as a half black person: if you guys continue to make a big stink about this now, you have effectively failed the strike within its final hours and never cared about the strike in the first place. if you stopped supporting palestine because of this, you're a fickle piece of shit who only cares about yourself and the people in your own space and never cared about palestine or its people in the first place. for some reason, you've seemingly forgotten, there ARE black palestinians. what happened yesterday, whether you consider it antiblack or not, does not reflect the views of all palestinians, and they still need your help right now.

also, i think this goes without being said now, but motaz and bisan were NEVER meant to be these ultimate pillars of the palestinian voice. while it is important that they are journalists, and some of only a few surviving ones left unfortunately, it's important to not forget the roughly 2 MILLION OTHER PALESTINIANS fighting for their lives physically, emotionally and mentally in their homeland right now, especially with ramadan approaching evermore and the threat of a mass bombing campaign looming over their heads and ours.

this is what zionists want (if i heard correctly, they've already started weaponizing the motaz video against us). this is what "israel" wants. this is what the governments aiding "israel" want. this is what the big corporations being boycotted want. this is what the people who never gave a shit about palestine want. they want our silence, so that they can continue their genocidal settler colonialist campaign and show all oppressed people everywhere that we've learned absolutely nothing. do NOT give them that satisfaction. do NOT let them rest. they need to keep writhing in their own suffering of knowing that humanity actually cares about oppressed people.

the strike continues all throughout today. make this last day count, and every day after that.

[indestinatus]

Hi, different anon, i dont know who sent the others. i want to say some things but please don't take any of this in the wrong way. ive followed you for a long time, you're well liked and well respected in the tiva fandom for good reason however, i agree with the anon that there has been a change that has nothing to do with your life commitments (which im happy for you BTW!)

You said its overwhelming on twitter because of the number of people there now but this isn't accurate, if there were a large number of people being kind on there then there wouldn't be a problem but these people are continuously unkind to anyone who isn't in their "troops".

You reference "tiva fights" on twitter but i don't remember a time before the spin-off was announced that there was drama on this constant scale like this in the fandom. you say you won't support "content stealing or random rudeness" yet the only people you now interact with on twitter are the very people doing this (i think this is an issue the anon was talking about).

You say you've made real friends here over the years and that's true! but like the anon said its like you've dropped these friends and are only focused on the people who are intent on tearing this fandom apart for their own egotistical gains.

Your "new" friends have created nothing but trouble since they appeared when the spin-off was announced. they have been rude, insulting, belittling, condescending, aggressive etc towards anyone who doesn't share their mindset. they gang up on people who say one thing they don't like and are also attacking random people not in the fandom who comment on announcement tweets. either you don't know the full extent of the damage they've caused inside this fandom to people who are friends with you (which is fine because there are many people who can explain it to you), or you know what they've done to people and you simply don't care. i think the ambiguity of this particular part is unsettling people because it seems as if you're condoning what they've done.

I think you yourself are a really nice and kind person but the friends you've now got are affecting the way people see you. i saw also you had quote retweets from hawaii fans and that's because your new friends have done nothing but attack them for months, so now you are receiving it too because you associate with them.

Overall it just seems like there is confusion to you not talking to these new people at all to suddenly they are the only ones you talk to. I know you can't control what other people do but this is more of a reflection of what your friendship with them is presenting.

hello, anon. this ask has made me immensely sad.

first of all, who am I in the grand scheme of things. for you to be monitoring my activity and debating who I should be talking to like... I admit I am a person moved by fandom. In the ncis fandom, especially the tiva fandom, there are waves of activity both here and on other socials like twitter and instagram. I've spent almost 2 years not posting on twitter and only making content for tumblr, both gifsets and fics, and talking to the fandom in here. Likewise, when it's more active there I tend to float toward where people want to talk about it. And who share fandom content and who are actually excited about what I also share.

I talked about some stuff you allude to in this ask only in my private twitter which means you're one of my closest friends in the fandom, and it makes me sad. And no, I never categorized myself in any friend group. I don't take sides in fights inside a fandom (which, idk if you know this but the ncis fandom was really big in 2010s and every big fandom has fights and wow do I even need to talk about the drama back then) and if you monitor my activity so closely I think you also know I wasn't aware of the details of this until a few days prior. Since then, I've collected myself again and I haven't shared content I know is from other people whom I respect and I don't interact with arguments about cancellations and other drama like this. I hate it. I'm here to talk about fictional characters and share stuff I'm excited about.

that said, I haven't dropped any friends. I'm not inside any "new troops". from what I remember, I tried my best not to be "rude, insulting, belittling, condescending, aggressive" against anyone. My real friends from this fandom know who they are and we talk constantly, they have my private phone number and my personal instagram. we support each other. I don't know anything other than seeing a few friends talking about having their gifs been stolen (so no, it's not like "I simply don't care") but also idk if I'm interested in fandom drama. since then, I voiced my opinion about taking someone else's content as one's own and focused on making my own content again, sharing the ones I know are from people who created them and staying silent.

since the spin-off news dropped I've been overwhelmed with the number of new people who suddenly arrived in this fandom and also with the zero amount of time I now have to create fandom content about stuff I'm so excited about. I didn't even have the time to digest this news and am constantly bombarded with new things and no time to process them like I wanted to. no time to make the gifsets, fics, or talk to people like I did before and also who aren't as active anymore anywhere. it breaks my heart to be excited about stuff in a way my life doesn't allow me to be.

anyway, after this whole ramble, I hope you realize I hate fandom drama and that is why I post my content, voice my opinion, and make myself scarce. if you want to explain what happened or simply talk to me, feel free and I'm OK with being judged. but also I don't intend to be as active anymore currently because of things like these and asks like these from anons. I'm sorry. if anyone wants to talk about tony and ziva, let me know.

[literaticat]

i'm sure you're soooo over author/agent drama, but there's been more, and honestly, i'm freaked out. i feel like a lot of agents close to mine (not my agent but in the same circle) have been making some bad calls and getting trashed online, and it's making me worry something bad will happen for my agent/agency. am i being unreasonable? should i be worried?

A LOT of agents? Yikes. I did log on to Xitter just to see what the drama was this time, and I saw something about ONE agent, so I don't know about LOTS.

Long story very short, and what I presume you are talking about, this weekend an agent did a terribly ill-considered tweet basically saying that they loved the premise of some query but didn't love the material, and would love a story like that if somebody else wanted to write it. Which is a bonkers thing to tweet -- first, because the smallest child should realize that would be insulting as hell to the author whose work with that premise you JUST TURNED DOWN -- but also, because it makes YOU look like you are an idea-thief encouraging idea-thievery.

Naturally, the writers of Xitter took umbrage and had themselves a dog-pile, the agent deactivated their account, and by the end of the day, the agency announced that agent had been fired. Meanwhile, there are a ton of agitated writers talking about "toxic and predatory agents" and how "this is so typical of agents" etc -- which just ISN'T TRUE, actually.

I would say that this is not an example of a schmagent, or predator -- it's an example of somebody whose brain was on vacation while their fingers were working overtime. Agents should not be talking about queries publicly at all, and should CERTAINLY not be insulting queriers -- it's hard as hell to write a book, and it's brave as hell to put your work out there!

That being said, I don't really buy the "idea thievery" of it all -- they gave general comps in their tweet, not any kind of specifics; if you gave 30 writers the same comps, you'd come up with 30 different works. LOTS of books have the same comps or similar premises and in fact are totally different from one another. Authors put their own premises and comps on twitter all the time, and don't seem too worried that somebody is going to steal them. ALSO, If an agent were TRYING to idea-thief, they wouldn't do it on twitter, they'd do it under cover of night. But hey -- it's for sure not great.

Here's the thing, though. OK actually multiple things:

a) The agency in question is a reputable agency with great agents and amazing clients, and they took decisive action pretty much the moment they realized an agent of theirs EFFED UP, which is far from an easy thing to do. I don't know the agent in question, but the boss is my friend -- but even if she weren't, I'd know she's a GREAT AGENT with GREAT CLIENTS, and pretty much a walking green flag.

b) This comment was careless, yes. Ill-considered, certainly. EVIL, probably not. But in any event, it's truly NOT reflective of how most agents think or behave.

c) twitter is not the real world -- long-term, this will not be likely to have a negative effect on the agency's ability to make great deals or anything else. The authors who just had their agent vanish will continue to either be supported by other agents at the agency, or they will find other agents quickly if they decide to leave. The other authors repped by the agency will, I'd assume, remain loyal to their fine agents who had nothing to do with anything. The agency, then, will continue to have good agents, good clients, and work with good publishers, and this rough weekend will be in the rearview except for maybe now and again some twitter snark that most people will not even understand because the origin of it will be forgotten and most people aren't on twitter, actually. Perhaps most importantly,

d) Dumb internet comments are not contagious.

If you are happily agented, I see zero reason you need to concern yourself about what internet buffoonery MIGHT happen. It probably won't happen! And if something unforeseen and weird ever DID happen with an agent at your agency, I would hope that the agency would handle it with grace and you'd be affected as little as possible. I just don't think that's something you need to worry about, there's enough to worry about IRL without INVENTING bad scenarios!

[somedreamlove]

My very controversial opinions on all the Quackity drama:

As far as I’m concerned, Quackity can have any sort of business practices he wants, that’s literally on him, but nobody is obligated to accept working conditions that don’t treat them well. Like I’m seeing so much ‘Quackity didn’t treat his employees well’… but why did the employees let themselves be treated in such a way then? Why did they stay? Why did they continue to work?? And don’t tell me they stayed for the money (which is also a form of consent, by the way, if you’re treating yourself badly for money, that’s on you), because they weren’t even getting paid!

So I’m sorry, I’m not really sympathetic to someone who accuses another person for not upholding their own self-worth. Why did you work full time for months for free? Like genuine question.

I’ve also seen people apparently criticising Quackity for having his brother in the company, which is just so unserious I don’t even know what to say. Of course people are going to involve their family members in their business, that’s literally just that. Frankly I’m glad some familial relationships are stronger than twitter opinions.

And about Quackity’s merch company—once again, what do I care? Quackity can have any sort of merch company he wants. I’m not obligated to buy anything from it, and it really doesn’t matter to me if it exists over there somewhere where I’m not, because I’m not interacting with it. So again, what does it have to do with me? If someone wants to buy something from there, that’s their choice. Am I supposed to be the knight in shining armour protecting someone from their own decisions? You have to be responsible for your own life experiences. Seriously guys I cannot overestimate how important for your inner peace it is to realise that people can do whatever they want, and the only way it can affect you is if you consent to it and accept their product.

It’s like the analogy of a kitchen—a kitchen that is fully stocked and has every ingredient imaginable. Say you want to make some pumpkin pie—you aren’t going to get mad that the ingredients for a salad are there, because they’re not something you’re going to put into your pie. It’s fine for them to exist! But you don’t have to put them in your pie.

So, Quackity is making a sunday roast somewhere over there, but you don’t want to eat the sunday roast, and nobody can make you eat the sunday roast, so what does it matter?

(I say this as someone who is deeply neutral about Quackity as I am about most people. If you feel strongly negative about another person, you’re actually only seeing a projection of yourself. Try replacing all the mentions of him with yourself in all your sentences and self-reflect until you understand what you’re projecting.)

[sinsiriuslyemo]

It's been a long, long time ya'll.

I know you've heard (or rather seen) this more than a million times before, but for the last several months I've been doing some real thinking about what I want my online presence to look like. For years, it seems that I've been operating in a sort of chaos, allowing myself to easily become overwhelmed with not just the number of platforms on which I had a presence (yes, had. we'll get there, I promise) but also taking on new ventures and getting burnt out rather quickly.

As I reflected on my online activity, I realized that there was one place where I felt most at home, and happy. Here. With you, my fandom buddies. And so, this is a post to announce that I'm coming home. I'll still have my twitter account, but won't be posting there too often, really just when I have a quick thought that I want to get off my chest or find a fun thread/conversation to join. I'll be posting here again much more often, and I'll also have an Ao3.

Yes. For years I resisted creating an Ao3 account because, frankly, I was intimidated by it. The interface was confusing to me, and I was easily overwhelmed with the sheer volume of fics to choose from.

I also wasn't the greatest fan of the fact that there is no social media aspect to it, like there is here. But in the last few months, I've learned how to work the search feature on there and have read such amazing fics that has reignited my hunger for fandom interaction. I miss being nerdy with ya'll! I miss fangirling over gifs with you and gushing about a new edit that someone posted, or a fic that makes me giddy with feels of every color. Most of all I miss immersing myself in my favorite characters and creating stories and head canons.

So yes, I'm back!

Just a few things though, and I hope you'll hear me out.

Currently, I have been completely out of the loop with respect to SVU. I still love the show and will likely catch up on what I've missed eventually, but it's simply not where my interests lie at the moment. Lately, I've been steeping myself in the Harry Potter fandom (though I want to make it perfectly clear that I only support HP fan works and fanmade products. Fuck JK Rowling) and have been working on some fics for that fandom.

If this isn't your bag, I get it! But I just want to be up front that that is likely the content you will see for the foreseeable future, moving forward. That said, I may still post in other fandoms once in a while, including the SVU fandom, but for the most part, you can expect HP works for now.

That brings me to my asks. I still have around 20, and I've decided NOT to delete them. I will get to them eventually, but I don't know when that will be (likely whenever the mood strikes). Also, I have The Lawyer and the Pianist that is as of now unfinished. I will be finishing that story, but again, the updates will be sporadic. And of course, there's also the RAUL series. I will be updating the ongoing story I have there, but again, sporadic updates and likely won't be expanding that concept much more for the time, unless of course the inspiration bites me in the ass. It very well may, but for now I'm only going to be finishing the story I've already started, nothing more. I know that may not be what you want to hear, but it's the truth, and that's the least I owe you guys.

There are also other fandoms that I'm interested in that I may start to write fics for at some point. Those include Hawaii 5-0 (yes, I'm aware it's been off air for a few years, but whatevs lol) and The Orville (I'm actually not sure whether there's a fandom presence for this show in here). Scott Caan has also started a new show called Alert, which is another procedural drama that I may begin to watch at some point and maybe will get inspired to write for. I don't know yet.

I'll also likely post some personal things or just stuff I'm interested in or want to talk about that may or may not have to do with fandom. It may have to do with writing, or just some feelings I have that I want to write about, or even personal updates, including when I have new original stories coming out. I also want to start posting book reviews of the stuff I'm personally reading A) because I love talking about books anyway and B) because I'm about 75% certain I'm going to be deleting my Youtube channel, where I normally would've posted it, and 100% certain that I won't be posting anymore videos. It's just too much, I get overwhelmed, and I let my followers there down just as I've let ya'll down before. I'm trying to change that.

That said, I do have indie authors who sometimes ask me to do reviews of their books (I have one that I'm going to be reading after I finish The Bone Witch) and I still want to be able to do that for them and offer a platform for me to promote their works. These are amazing writers who do not have the benefit of a publishing house resources in order to market their books, and I want to use my platform to share their wonderful stories with ya'll. I hope that's okay. I'll review mainstream books as well, but I want the majority of my reviews to be my fellow indies.

But for now, ya'll, as far as any fanfic I post (and I'm working on several atm) it's gonna be Harry Potter central up this bitch. Likely Sirius Black central because A) he's my absolute favorite character (do not @ me) and B) Gary Oldman can get it.

I also have coming up (as in literally done and waiting in my queue to be posted) reviews for And Straight On Till Morning, The Bone Witch, and Splinter (indie), a do's and don'ts post for writing summaries, and chapter one of a fic I've been working on for the last few weeks. As for my posting schedule, I'm gonna start with once a week for now and see how that goes. I'll be here every day though, reading other writer's works, commenting, reblogging, etc.

Along with posting here, I will continue to work on my original stories, which you can find on Amazon. And if you want to support me, you can also buy me a Ko-Fi. I used to hesitate hardcore to post those last three things on here. Because this was what I mainly used for fandom, I thought it would be presumptuous and also kind of a dick move to ask for support, but I've been working on recognizing my own worth, and realized that just because I ask, doesn't mean anyone has to do it. Therefore, there's no harm in asking, and for those of you that want to support me financially, you should be able to do so. But just know that I don't expect anything. I'm here because I love it here, and I will still be writing fanfic for free.

I know tumblr isn't the same as when I was last here (like, really here, not just saying I was here) but that's okay. I just want to be here, and post my fics and that's enough for me.

One last thing, from now on I will be signing off with my pen name (Hero West) instead of my actual first name. The main reason for this is because I've decided that for my mental health and for my safety as well, I need to keep my private life off the internet as much as possible. So, I want to stop using my real first name. I'm perfectly aware that I've used it to sign off in the past, and I'm going to try my hardest to edit all of those posts, but as you can imagine, that will take a very long time.

Still, I hope you'll understand and refer to me using "Hero" instead of my real first name.

With peace and love,

Sinceriously,

Hero

PS - Needless to say I'm going to be watch A Murder at the End of the World just for funsies because it looks interesting and also, Raul Esparza 🥰

[inyourwildestdreams22]

You don’t have to post or anything but the posts you posted/deleted on Sunday after Taylor’s aoty win as well as some you’ve reblogged were in bad taste. I hope you understand that people have valid criticism of Taylor both in the results of the Grammys as well the capitalistic side effects of her lifestyle. Not saying you don’t have the right to love her and her music! But you acted dismissive of others, especially women of color, who voiced their valid critiques of the woman’s wins and actions. You writing their opinion off as just being “haters”  was wrong. Your words came across petty and distasteful. I hope you understand the inherit bias the media/industry has for Taylor versus her contemporaries. Some of us are tired of seeing only her be rewarded for things many others (especially other women/woc) have tirelessly worked on and accomplished. This corner of tumblr has so many diverse voices and your posts (to me) wrote their perspective/commentary off completely. Frankly that just seems mean to me. 

If Taylor fans can’t handle any valid criticism of her then it may be time to reflect on your relationship to her. These past few days have been so jarring on here! If you can’t take a step back and acknowledge that you’ve completely disregarded valid critique of that woman you’re going to continue to lose connections/followers on here by writing others voices off. I realize that I’m not Taylor’s target audience as a poc so I do tend to critique her as an outsider. But it was lowkey hurtful to see her fans write off our voices/opinions. Not trying to police what you say/do on here bc it’s your blog but maybe don’t be petty or rude because it didn’t paint you (or the other swifties in this corner of tumblr) in the best light. Realistically these small things don’t matter in the grand scheme of everything but it’s been on my mind the past few days. Idk it changed the way I view your blog and how you interact with the poc voices present here. I hope you continue to be open and understanding next time. :/

I accept criticism and I get not liking someone but you have to understand that when you keep reading over time nasty things about someone you are a fan of it gets tiring, specially when some people write it in a way that translates to the people who enjoy her music, basically implying that we are basic or white supremacists because we enjoy it and honestly I shut up a lot of times but you get fed up at one point, I am the first one to criticise people I am a fan of but acting like she is a terrorist and wanting me to stay cool reading that it’s a bit too much, my main Taylor fandom is not even in this corner but on twitter, as I am here mainly for TZ. Also when you mention the capitalist sideffects of her lifestyle, do you really think she is the only one that is doing that? Seems kinda hypocrite to me because every single millionare has that, you gotta be aware that all these HW people are capitalists.

Also I think that a lot of people deserve awards and recognition as much as she does (to me its crazy that Beyonce has not win AOTY) but to completely discredit her ? You can be frustrated and talk about all those conversations about woc having to work harder and that’s completely normal and valid but not to act like she is completely undeserving.

Lastly honestly you are judging me by calling me rude and mean and you don’t know me at all, you don’t know how I am in real life so making all those judgements based on a moment of lashing cause I was fed up seems unfair to me, I actually deleted it cause maybe some comments were taken the wrong way and I did not want to bring drama here and not make it weird for my tz mutuals I have here out of respect. Anyways this is the last thing I’ll say about this, I want to protect my peace of mind and this for me is about fun so yeah not dwelling on negative discourse.

[arrow-dodger]

I have been spending increasingly less time on social media. I basically don't even use Twitter anymore and haven't for like at least this entire year so far. I mostly open Facebook to look people up for things or keep track of events, and I basically never spend time scrolling on there because videos autoplay with sound enabled and that's fucking insane to me.

I'm on here sometimes, if this even counts. I kinda don't think so. I only have TikTok so I can view things people send me, but I actually legitimately hate being on there for more than a video or two at a time. It gives me anxiety.

When I open my phone for mindless scrolling I actually typically end up on reddit now. And I was a reddit hater in the past, believe me. But the idea that I can follow pages for all the different things I'm interested in, and those pages are what make up my entire feed, is so novel amongst all these other sites that constantly push OTHER shit in my face. I know there's an algorithm there, but it's kind of fine? I mean I'm still just seeing fandom discussions, posts of cute animals, uhhh kinda everything tumblr was for me in like 2012, if I'm being honest.

One thing I do that is probably actually bad for me though is read those "relationship drama" kinds of subs. There are a lot of those and I kinda can't get enough of them. They definitely make me think deeply about human relationships and how complicated that shit is, and playing thought experiments like that is fun for me I think.

And man, I used to think that the people writing posts on those subs were the people with issues, but the people who frequent those subs and COMMENT on those posts are the ones with the worst issues, I'm finding. Every single post has at least a couple of people very concernedly explaining to OP some variation of "your boyfriend is an abusive narcissistic sociopath and is going to murder you and you need to get out YESTERDAY," no matter the conflict. It's actually wild to me to see people talking so confidently and prescriptively about the lives of strangers they've only read a few paragraphs about. It's like they're trying to explain to the poster what that person's own life is sometimes. The lack of nuance and critical thinking often startles me, but the patronizing tone REALLY does me in.

It reminds me of the black and white thinking of a teenager (which I was guilty of a thousand times over, as evidenced by this blog), except it's way worse because everyone these days fancies themselves some kind of psychology expert because they've read and watched things on the internet. They've read all the pop psychology "facts" and articles, they listen to true crime podcasts, they watch youtubers and TikTokers spew psychology jargon with the confidence of someone with a PhD even though they're like 22 and probably work at like, Target. So now everyone knows all the big fancy words and uses them freely.

But I personally can't get past the idea that being overly clinical and pathological about every human interaction or characteristic just leads to a lack of real empathy, self reflection, and accountability. If everything everyone else does that is bad or harmful is because of some disorder you are deciding they have that makes them Evil, then they're irredeemable and you can write them off entirely. You can take yourself completely out of having contributed to any conflict you had with that person. And if you have some self-diagnosed disorder that is an untreatable innate part of who you are that you can use to attribute any bad behaviors YOU have to, that means you may get trapped in a cycle of feeling like you never have to grow or work on yourself ever again. Which is... bad!

I dunno, it's like, sometimes people just suck. There doesn't have to be anything deeper to it. They're selfish, maybe, or a bad communicator, or they have trauma they've never worked on, or something "ugly" like BPD, or maybe you and them aren't compatible honestly, or in VERY few cases in my personal opinion, yeah, they're just vindictive. I think less people are truly cruel and vindictive than we like to think. People aren't sitting out there in armchairs with their fingers steepled, plotting evil plots about how they're going to next ruin your life. And if you think they are then consider that you're not the main character. They're usually reacting to things moment to moment just like you, and they're the hero of their own story, even if they're a shitty hero. A Game of Thrones tier hero. Hot take, but even people who are abusive are usually not evil fucking masterminds.

We should, uh, cut each other more slack. In general. We're all out here learning how to person, together, in a world and a society that is constantly trying to crush us. So yeah. Also, existing systems of classification are not the end-all-be-all and are not meant to be. Those evolve over time, and I truly think we're seeing at a rapid rate these days how a lot of our current ones are broken as fuck.

[limeade-l3sbian]

This is such a weird message for you to get but I wanted to get these feelings out somehwere and you are very comforting.

I feel like i’m forever done with social media. I’ve spent so much time on social media since becoming a teenager. I’ve neglected my actual social life completely for years. And it’s not been good for my social development, as an already awkward person back then i’ve only become increasingly more so. But I kept going back to social media. It would make me anxious to be here but also without it. It would make me angry. Having to interact with people and seeing peoples extreme emotionality. It ruined my mood very often. People were always extremely toxic over the smallest disagreements and would throw extremely severe buzzwords at everyone. Like radical feminists being called genocidal or fascist. Even though I knew I was none of those or some of the other stuff others have called me, it felt incredibly burdensome and tiring to have such serious terms thrown as me and others similar over very small disagreements. Then there’s the threat of doxxing online. It got me so scared from years ago when a friend of mine was doxxed over an anime disagreement. Yes you heard that right. She thought a character in a show was overrated and someone took it upon themselves to doxx her and out her sexuality to her family. Luckily they were accepting though surprised. But the mere fact that stuff like that was becoming more and more common place in the online space to do was frightening. Especially nowadays when i’ve been part of communities regarding much more heavy subjects. The odds are higher and I’m too old. I’m only in my twenties but I feel simply too old for all the drama online. It’s exhausting. Seeing people try to argue over the most insignificant stuff you might say in an afterthought on twitter or on here or wherever. People will find a way to start arguments. Always. And im simply not in that mindset to engage anymore. I can’t. While I’m still exhausted I’ve stopped being anxious in the way where i shake. I’m apathetic largely in my reaction towards others online now. I cannot connect to others anymore. I like some more than others but I don’t trust anyone even the slightest bit anymore. My anxiety is mostly focused around the lack of trust now towards the people, not the actual spaces.

You might say it’s odd for me to say all this, online. It is I guess. I’m not leaving the internet per se. I’m just not addicted anymore, i think? I’m not reliant. And i’m completely fed up with social media. I do not wanna make friends or connections. I do not wanna argue my POV with others anymore. I don’t wanna try. Sometimes it’s nice to just exist without having to justify said existence and I think the online space have become nothing except that, people trying to justify their opinion and feelings and push them onto others. I’m doing it in a way now. You will be my last online interaction. I’m sorry. But you are my favorite account on here and you remind someone from my past. In a positive way.

My mother always say that people online are not a real representation of humans. But I always think to myself that I disagree. I think online, people are their truest selves, without the fear of repercussions in most cases. But peoples true selves make me irritable and anxious. So goodbye social networks.

merry belated christmas btw

This was very insightful and actually gave me quite a bit to think about on my end as well, anon! You've perfectly worded what it means to be chronically online. Not in the way meant to offend, but in the literal sense.

I appreciate the kind words 🥹 and I wish you the best of luck! This sounds like a really good decision and the amount of self reflection you have is gonna do you a lot of good now and later. Best of luck! 💜💜💜