#uh. presented without comment lmao

[sleepyslag]

X

[t0ast-ghost]

Star Trek II: Wrath Of Khan thoughts:

For this post if I could simply embed the entire movie and just write the word, ‘queer’ I would. Unfortunately you are all stuck with this, happy pride month!

Spoilers for the entire movie will be featured in this post

Going forth:

- I know what the kobayashi maru is so I know they’re not in danger but that’s some good acting Bones

- “‘Physician heal thyself.’” “Is that all you’ve got to say? What about my performance?” “I’m not a drama critic.” Thinking about this pose thinking about this pose thinking about thi-

- “Galloping around the cosmos is a game for the young, Doctor.” He’s feeling something and projecting

- “Aren’t you dead?” That’s certainly a way to greet your husband

- They’re so cute. And sad. And cute.

- tiny guys hehe. The boots got sluttier somehow

- McCoy got him glasses cause he can’t read the book without it and bring up that post that’s saying how Spock and McCoy’s gifts go together but McCoy got the logical thing and Spock got the emotional one

- Don’t quote me on this but the things I would do to that man… I wouldn’t.. but holy shit that outfit is killing me.

- hi checkov

- Carol Marcus? Doesn’t she have Kirk’s-? okay then I won’t spoil that just yet

- Creature in a jar moving under the sand

- BOTANY BAY????? Oh wait a sec I should’ve seen that coming it’s called wrath of khan

- Did they kill Chekov?

- hello Khan. That’s a very long and dramatic reveal he’s kinda hot tho

- Thinking about genetic engineering and augmentation and how they’re illegal but star trek presents cases where people now exist and it’s not the fault of the person that they are what they are so they have to question if an entire person should be illegal because of the actions of others… anyway I don’t wanna get deep into this right now, back to the movie

- Are they going to kill Chekov? (edit: not sure why I’m so fixated on thinking they’re gonna)

- WOW THAT IS CERTAINLY A SWEAT DROP

- brain worms… this sounds recently familiar

- HES READING HIS BOOK WITH THE GLASSES THEY DIDNT NEED TO SHOW HIM DOING THAT BUT THEY DID AND ITS ADORABLE OMG

- The conversation between Savik and Spock is so precious. And it’s in Vulcan. And she says “He’s more human than I expected” and it’s like that’s her commenting on Spock’s husband

- Kirk does not want to do this inspection

- McCoy does a little bounce

- “For everything there is a first time. Wouldn’t you agree, admiral” “mmhhmm” “Would you like a tranquilizer?” *Kirk shakes his head*

- I think this one has a more solid plot. I’m enjoying so far :)

- Does McCoy serve on this ship or is he just following along?

- (Had to stop watching around here because I left for the weekend so these thoughts are potentially a bit different)

- wowah! Cool ship!

- uh oh. Chekov on the monitor with the brain worm!

- khan is kinda- yeahh

- I LOVE SAAVIK! RAHHH! Also apparently Saavik is canonically half Vulcan half Romulan according to the trivia

- I like how Bones is just there :)

- Putting Spock in black… they knew what they were doing

- They’re husbands your honour. Spock knows Kirk wants to take command and isn’t to proud to get in the way of making his wife happy

- “You are my superior officer. You are also my friend. I have been and always shall be yours.” Kissing would have been less romantic

- George Takei’s voice is majestic

- “He tasks me. He tasks me and I shall have him. I’ll chase him round the moons of Nibia and round the Antares maelstrom and round perdition’s flames before I give him up.” Not obsessive at all.. nope this is something completely and totally normal to say about your nemesis

- “Uhura, have Doctor McCoy join us (Kirk and Spock) in my quarters.” Hmmmmm.. gotta inform the whole polycule about the shady government experiment

- lmao BOTH Spock and McCoy know who Carol Marcus is

- oh so terraforming… NEVERMIND REALLY FAST TERRAFORMING

- “Really, Dr. McCoy, you must learn to govern your passions. They will be your undoing.” Flirting, gentlemen?

- How and why does Starfleet continually put Spock and McCoy together? Like this alert would be sent out 24/7

- Spock and his awesome daughter Saavik

- falling

- Kirk with the breast flap down

- such a good moment… such a great moment (sorry for shitty photos)

- Kirk has to put on his little glasses <3

- Kirk does NOT fuck around

- Poor Scotty. He’s got so much emotion about his dead crew mate and the doctor apologizing to him 🥺🥺🥺

- Saavik making up rules to make sure the admiral is safe. Love her.

- “Jim, be careful.” “We will.” MCCOY IS SO BITTER. Like ‘no wishes of luck for me, Spock? Fuck you!’

- The collar on that uniform is silly

- hehe McCoy got scared by a rat. OH HE ALSO GOT SCARED BY A DEAD BODY

- Kirk’s little disappointed “oh my god” as he finds Chekov in the cupboard

- “Suppose they went nowhere.” “Then this’ll be your big chance to get away from it all.” McCoy’s not leaving Kirk, but he still looks like he wants to strangle him sometimes

- Kirk not afraid to punch a bitch

- WAIT THATS KIRKS SON?!? Isn’t it?? I thought David was Carol’s brother. But nope!

- aww dammnit I knew they were still mind controlled :/

- Saavik saving David. Y’know it would be pretty cool if there was something about Saavik, David, and Johanna meeting and maybe serving on a ship of their own.. idk just thoughts.

- ewwww brain worm.

- OH THE ECHOING “KHANNN”

- mmmm Kirk without the jacket. The white turtleneck with sleeves… also McCoy and Saavik are slaying with their turquoise and orange turtlenecks

- “Food the first order of survival.” I bet the fanfic writers had a field day with this one (cause cause it’s a reference to Tarsus IV)

- Imagine this: you’re stuck underground with your husband, your other husbands adopted daughter, your ex, her son (who’s also your son), and your old Russian navigator who’s unconscious and tried to kill you while being mind controlled by a worm which came out of his ear

- David’s got Kirk’s curls <333

- Kirk has a thing for people who look good in blue. Change my damn mind.

- “I don’t believe in a no win scenario.” He immediately calls Spock afterwards cause he’ll never lose with his husbands around

- “You lied.” “I exaggerated.” Yep, he IS that bitch

- Saavik is learning so much from them

- They still just.. let anyone onto the bridge. Like David is just there now

- oh no Scotty! Well McCoy was miraculously there to catch him

- CHEKOV BACK ON THE BRIDGE!

- Once again. Kirk does not fuck around! He just killed those guys

- “To the last I will grapple with thee.” WOW. Okay. Well.

- Khan’s about to terraform this bitch

- McCoy stopping Spock from going into the chamber..

- “You’re not going in there!” “Perhaps you’re right. What is Mr. Scott’s condition?” SIKE BITCH SPOCK JUST FUCKING NERVE PINCHED HIM. McCoy you should’ve been tipped off by the fact he 1. Said you were right and 2. Gave up trying to self sacrifice so easily

- wait why’d Spock connect to McCoy’s psi points and say remember? Remember what?

- I like there’s just a sign that flashes the word ‘radiation’ in red letters

- McCoy and Scotty BEGGING Spock not to do this. Break my fucking heart why don’t you?

- Kirk’s little run to the engine room <3

- I know he’s dying but those boots are so slutty

- Solely watching Kirk’s face is already like watching 10 puppies get killed

- “Don’t grieve, admiral.” Has me crying already. Your closest and longest friend is watching your slow descent into death and you ask him not to grieve you. You want him to know your death meant something. It meant he’d be safe and that is nothing to grieve. I’m going to be sick

- don’t touch me I’m thinking about this

- SAAVIK IS CRYING OMG GIRL ME TOO

- Kirk’s voice breaking.. god. Shatter my fucking heart why don’t you?

- if they play bagpipes at my funeral I’m rising from the dead (violins would be nice though)

- NOO HIS CUTE LITTLE GLASSES BROKE

- “They’re just words.” “But good words. That’s where ideas begin. Maybe you should listen to them.” POP OFF DAVID ! Good line

- SON REVEAL! NOT CLICKBAIT

- There’s 8 minutes left of this. Did they leave this one with Spock dead?

- “He’s really not dead, as long as we remember him.” Good words McCoy. But perhaps maybe you might have some.. assistance remembering him?

- got distracted and drew Kirk but I love the last little Spock narration. Really brave to end a WHOLE MOVIE with one of the best most well known characters being dead

Well that movie did have its pros and… khans

…

See you next time

Masterpost

[lunar-knight84]

BACK TO BLACK

Cheater Marc Spector x reader, Steven grant x reader

Summary: you and Marc had an amazing relationship but suddenly he leaves without a word. What happens when you meet one of his alters years into your new life and he finally tells you the truth about the past and present ? What happens when everything is left unsaid and yet you feel something new in your heart for that special alter that you met?

N/A: this may be really bad i'm in my feelings and this is what came out lmao. This also took me a long ass time and idk how it is. I’m sorry if it’s terrible! Also feel free to leave a comment!

warning/stuff inside: the use of the word girl/girlfriend and she/her pronouns, Angst, not an accurate representation of DID, OOC, not proof read, Let me know if I missed anything!

You-red

Steven-purple

Marc-blue

Kind of inspired by the song back to black by amy winehouse

When you first marc you truly thought he was a free single man. The way he lifted you up in his arms that night and kissed you with such passion it felt like he was single and ready to take on the world with you. So of course when he asked you out on a date you said yes, of course you said yes when he said he could only call late at night. Of course you didn't mind when he told you he could only go to your place on random days while you could never go to his place. You were in love with marc…blinded with love I guess you can say. One day Marc just stopped seeing you. Completely. You called and texted him wondering where he was or what you could have done to upset him. You waited and waited till finally you gave up…your tears finally dried and you decided to live a new life in london. That was a few years ago and now you work as a bounty hunter in london, you have completely started a new life without Marc but never forgetting the scar that he cut deep in your heart. You were currently on your way to a museum that was filled with Egyptian artifacts and history, which honestly made you kind of excited. Of Course you were there for a specific reason, which was to stalk your bounty who was going to take a tour of the museum. As you walked into the museum you found your bounty and began taking the tour while watching your victim closely. You eyes watched but also looked around at the museum as you took in all of the artifacts and history. You stop in your tracks as you see a familiar and heart crushing locks of curls standing away from you in the gift shop. You can feel your heart beating in your ears like a drum as you walk up to the gift shop and grab a random candy placing it on the counter as you look at the cashier. The cashier looks at you and greets you in a British accent ¨well hello! Im steven! What can I do for you today?¨ he says with a smile as you continue to stare at those familiar romantic brown eyes. The eyes that would stare at you in between your legs, the eyes that you saw making you dinner on tired nights, the eyes that left you… alone and heartbroken. ¨uh miss are you okay?¨ Steven asks you curious and a bit nervous as to why you're staring at him. You swallow hard as you slide the candy over to him and give him 3.87 pounds as you continue to stare at him. Steven is nervous but as he looks down to put the cash away marc calls him from the reflected surface of a mirror nearby ¨ Steven do not talk to that woman…you need to just give her the candy and then leave¨. Steven looks at Marc confused as you suddenly speak ¨you said your name is steven? Is that correct?¨ Your eyes are blank and your voice is low and alluring as you speak to steven. Steven just nod as his nerves are getting to him as he hands you the candy. ¨well then steven… you must have a twin cause i used to know a fellow name marc who looks exactly like ya …you seen him lately..¨ you say as you stare down steven determined to figure out what the hell is going on. Steven tenses as you mention Marc as he stutters when he speaks ¨h- how do you know marc?¨. Marc calls out again in a stern but worried tone ¨ Steven dont… you dont need to know.. Stop talking to her!¨. You smirk as you lean forward ¨oh..he's just…an old friend..¨ you say as if the words are like honey on your tongue. Steven hears your words and is unsure of what to say next as he turns to you but before he can speak you give him your phone number. ¨heres my number steven…let me know when marc is around… tell him an old friend wants to speak to him.. Bye now..¨ you say as you walk away leaving Steven unsure about his feelings while marc is suddenly silent. That night Steven calls you. ¨ h-hello?..¨ he says nervously ¨hi steven…have you finally reached marc for me?¨ you say gently. ¨how do you know marc?...¨ he asks again a bit more strongly as he is determined to figure out how you know marc. You chuckle ¨he's an old friend…¨ you say slowly.

¨what does that mean?¨ Steven asks, unsure of how to proceed as Marc suddenly speaks to him from another mirror in Steven's home. ¨ dont steven…stop before you make this worse..¨ Marc says urgently, steven only moves the mirror away, dead set on figuring out who you are exactly. ¨it means what it means steven… now let me talk to marc..he must be near you if you called me¨ you say a bit annoyed. Steven chuckles a bit and mumbles ¨if only you knew…¨ . ¨what do you mean?¨ you asked confused ¨first you tell me who you are then i'll let you speak to marc¨ he says. You sigh as you say ¨i was marcs girlfriend? I guess you can say girlfriend but it was more of me being his entertainment…¨ you say with a bit of anger. ¨wait what?... Marc had a wife..well ex wife now..¨ Steven says deeply confused as it's only silence on your side of the call. Soon steven hears a laugh ¨the fucker was using me to cheat? Fuck! I guess I should've known..¨ you say in a surprised but hurt tone. Steven went quiet as he was unsure of what to say as he heard your voice again ¨who are you steven? Are you marc and have you just been fucking with me?¨ you say with anger as your voice is harsh. Steven panics as he quickly says ¨no no i'm not marc! You see we have DID.. which means i'm another personality of Marc’s …¨ steven says nervously as he just hears another round of silence from you. He finally hears you sigh as you say ¨i see…so can marc hear me and everything? I'm sorry if that's a rude question. I don't know how all of this works…¨ you say gently and with a hint of kindness. Steven smiles a bit being appreciative that you're worried that you're offending him by asking your question ¨he can hear you and don't worry it's okay to ask..it's better then just assuming.¨ he says gently. ¨i see…well steven did he tell you about us…like me and him?..¨ you say a bit nervously. “No he didn’t…he just told me about his ex wife…” Steven says with a slightly nervous tone “well would you like to know about me and Marc…” you say in a whisper as if the words were too much. “Steven, stop talking to her…you don’t want to know!” Marc says from another reflective surface as Steven ignores him and instead says “yes tell me…about you and Marc…”. You sigh “when I first met Marc I didn’t know he was married at all…back then I really thought it was just me and him…and yeah there was some weird stuff like he wouldn’t let me go to his place and such but i guess I was blinded by love that i didn’t really care to see any of that strangeness…” you say with your tone changing into a subtle sadness. You continued on “one day Marc just stopped…he stopped coming by, he stopped texting me, calling me, he stopped everything…”. “I’m sorry…” Steven says unsure of what else to say as Marc had gone quiet. “I truly did believe It was me and marc…” you said quietly. Steven sighed he was unsure of what to say as you cut him off before he could say anything “look Steven…it's fine” you hang up quickly leaving Steven with his head filled with confusion and silence from marc.

A few days passed and Steven couldn't get you out of his head. Marc had not spoken to him either and after learning what he did to you and his ex wife, Steven did fully believe that Marc would do that. Steven decided that he would have a chat with Marc and get all of this sorted out once and for all. ¨ Marc, can you hear me?¨ Steven said as he stared at the bathroom mirror waiting for marc. ̈ Marc, come on, we have to talk about this mate…¨ Steven said hoping Marc would finally show. A few minutes passed and Steven was about to give up when Marc finally spoke ¨you had no right doing that…¨ he said obviously upset. Steven turned to Marc in the mirror ¨I had no right? You're off your rocker for saying that! You had no right cheating on your wife with that girl! That poor girl had absolutely no idea that you were married and then you got up and left her?! Not to mention your poor bloody wife-¨ ¨ Steven shut the hell up!¨ Marc says loudly as Steven listens to him. ¨you don't understand-¨ ¨well then help me understand mate cause it seems you broke that poor girl's heart along with your wife… did she even know?¨ Steven asks while cutting Marc off. Marc sighs ¨of course she didnt fucking know steven…look…that poor girl your talking about her name is Y/N..and i loved her…I may still even love her…” Steven chuckles as he cuts marc off again ¨you love Y/N and yet you were still with your wife you wanker!¨ Steven says getting upset. ¨ Steven if you let me explain-¨ ¨no you're going to talk to Y/N tomorrow and explain all this bloody mess to her¨ Steven says as his tone is full of anger. Marc just sighs ¨fine steven..fine¨ he says with a frustrated tone as he leaves steven alone in his flat. The next day comes and You receive a message from Steven to meet him in front of the museum and that Marc will talk to you. You begrudgingly get out of bed and start yo get ready for the emotional storm that you were about to head into. You soon make it to the museum and see Steven standing there as you go up to him. ¨hey steven…so um…i don't want to make you feel uncomfortable or anything but how will i speak to marc?¨ you say gently and a bit nervously. ¨Oh we just switch out from the front..but before i give control to marc…just know everything is going to be okay..¨ Steven says gently and with a reassuring smile. You felt a bit of heat coming to your cheeks as you saw Stevens smile. Steven is different then Marc but yet that smile will always bring warmth to your cheeks as your lips curl up in a small smile ¨ thank you steven…¨ you say gently as you rest your hand on his arm gently.

You soon see his light and cheerful demeanor change into a tense and guarded demeanor as his face becomes tighter and his smile fades into a frown. ¨uh steven you okay?...¨ You say gently, a bit worried about what happened as you remove your hand from his arm. ¨Y/N…¨ was all he said as that chicagoan accent stopped your breathing as you immediately knew who you were with. ¨marc…¨ you said softly. You both just stared at each other unsure of what to say. You finally say “what the fuck Marc…” as you feel your rage take over your initial surprise. Marc just stayed silent, which only seems to anger you more. “You were using me to cheat on your damn wife and you made me believe that we were actually gonna be something together…do you realize how fucked uo this all is…and not make matters worse I met Steven and he ended actually making me feel better about the gaping hole you left in my heart.” You say angrily as you are dangerously close to him. Marc still was silent. “What the hell marc are you gonna fucking talk to me or are you gonna be silent…” you say annoyed. Marc looks at you…with those same romantic eyes…as you feel your knees weaken just by looking at them. “I’m sorry…” he said very softly. You look at him with all the hurt you’ve kept inside after he left you. “ you don’t understand what I have felt for years without you Marc….you don’t the anger the sadness the foolish hope that you’ll come back…and now all of this…” I say with a frustrated sigh “I don’t know what to do in this this situation….”I say conflicted. Marc just stood silently as his demeanor changed again to Steven’s light and relaxed demeanor. “Zoey?…” Steven asked carefully. You look at Steven again and give out a angry growl. “What the fuck! What the fuck Marc! Why won’t you talk to me!” You say with tears as you yell at Steven seemingly forgetting that he was Steven. Soon you felt warmth spread as you realized Steven was hugging you. As soon as you feel Steven’s warm safe embrace you just let out all the unknown tears you had for years as you cling onto him as if he was your only hope. You felt your heart beating again…it seemed it was beating for Steven…or was it beating for Marc? You were unsure…all you knew was that Steven grant gave the Best hugs.

[fuck-customers]

Pls tell me someone else has been through something similar.

TL;DR: Paid for a strangers groceries. Got asked out by him through his friend. Denied coz Idk why he did that & uh... he was deff not femme presenting so not my preference (& I still feel bad about it lmao). ���� #rip

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

I don't hate this customer, but I constantly wonder if anyone has had a shared experience like this so if you have, PLEASE leave it in the comments (or reblogs).

(*Shared experience as in... a stranger/customer asking you out for something you did for them while on the clock or something you showed them at work that's a work perk.)

When I was a cashier at the american grocery store "English en Español", I was in a low income area. I constantly had cis men hitting on me for no valid reason, as I'm not the socially accepted aesthetic for "attractive" (probably because it was a small town so there wasn't much selection & I live in cities so I dressed/acted differently than most? Idk. I'm a transman, pre-t & pre-surgery, but present as femme for safety reasons, espec in small towns). I often didn't notice until coworkers told me after they had left or until the man, himself, told me straight up. It was common enough that we had a signal bc apparently I suck at picking up on people hitting on me. NO ONE working that night signaled for this one, despite several of my coworkers seeing this.

So needless to say, I did NOT see this coming.

There was a guy with two girls checking out their groceries at my register. It was late at night, close to closing. When it came to the guys portion of the groceries, he split things up to afford everything. (I feel that lol.) His card declined on the last part. He was maybe $25ish(?) short (idr exact amount). He asked to take off a few things & I was like "Wait, wait." & jumped around & slid my own card & paid for his stuff. At that time (about a decade ago) my finances were mostly stable. I was doing what I could for anyone who needed it. It wasn't abnormal for me to pay for people whose groceries got declined by under $50 if I had it that month. I was stuck at a grocery store all day & people quite literally need food. It's the *least* I could do while financially stable, yknow? He wasn't someone I singled out... just someone else I managed to have the privilege of helping.

But this guy looked like he was both a) about to cry & b) incredibly embarrassed. He barely whispered thank you to me before grabbing everything & RUNNING out the door. His two friends thanked me profusely & followed him out *normally*. Lol.

I didn't have anyone else to check out coz it was almost 10pm at that point, so I was just vibing at my register. Maybe 5 whole minutes later (yes, THAT LONG) one of the girls the guy was with comes back in & runs up to my register.

I didn't say anything coz I was confused. Why is everyone running? Why does everyone have so much energy? Jeeze. 💀

She said, quickly & excitedly, "Remember the guy you just saw that you paid for his groceries?"

Me: "👁👄👁... yeah?"

Her: "Well, he wanted to know if you wanted to go out with him. Like, on a date."

Me, confused, not knowing what to say, stalling: "Uhhhhhhm."

In my mind, I'm thinking: 'Why would he want that? Because I paid for his groceries? Does he think I'm one of those dommes that gives money to their subs? Oh no. I'm a sub, not a dom! Maybe he just thinks I'm nice? Oh god, he's gonna find out I'm NOT nice if we date... but I really only like femme presenting people. How tf do I say that in a small town where I don't want that to get out? I don't know what's happening here, but-"

Me, without hesitation: "Sorry, but ...I like women?"

Her: "👁👄👁... Was that a question?"

Me: "...No?"

Her: "... 👁👄👁 ...Okay, I'll tell him. Thanks!"

Again, with the running. Running out the door. To the car. They looked about the same age as me. Early 20s. Like... where are they getting this ENERGY??? 😭

He NEVER came into the location I worked at again while I was there for 3 years lmao. The two girls did. Ik he lived in the area. This was before the time of grocery delivery. So uh... I feel awful lol.

I also feel awful because I never really say no to anyone in that context or break up with anyone. I always force *them* to say no or break up with me so that I don't have to do it. 😅 I'd never in a million years lead anyone on coz that's completely unfair, but I really just need the other person to do it & I couldn't in that situation so it still sits in the back of my mind like, "oh my god what have I done" kind of catastrophic thoughts spiraling from there. Meanwhile, he probably doesn't even remember I exist. 💀

So rip to me, I guess.

Please tell me someone else has had some kind of interaction where a stranger/customer has asked you out or tried to get with you based on something you did (or did for them) on the clock or a work perk you showed them/they saw. 😭 Pls make me feel less alone in this lmao.

Also make sure to give the follow up tea! Did you go out? Did it work? Are you married? ☕️ 🦊

When I was 19 I gave a lady a coupon for money off (I'm 50 I forget how much it was for.) and this lady tried to hook me up with her 13yo daughter. I dunno if that counts.

-Rodney

[diagonal-queen]

If the BSD girls were my coworkers

♡ characters: Kyouka Izumi, Yosano Akiko, Kouyou Ozaki, Gin Akutagawa, Higuchi Ichiyou, Naomi Tanizaki, Lucy Maud Montgomery

♡ synopsis: How would these girls be if they were my coworkers?

♡ cw: Swearing, knives, mentions of sexual harassment

note: Well this took forever to write, my bad lol. Uh I'm working full time rn so my posting schedule is a little silly and goofy ahaha anyways um. Apologies for errors and I hope you enjoy x

If the BSD boys were my coworkers

Kyouka:

She would try her DAMNED HARDEST OKAY

Scarily good at cutting (legally she's not allowed to be cutting stuff because she's too young, but she's good at it so I wouldn't snitch). Like she'll slice up a whole box of lettuce in like two seconds. We would NEVER run out of cuts with Kyouka on board

Also very good at cleaning, would clear out the entire store and kitchen in a manner of minutes

However she's bad with customers. Like REALLY bad. She would either just tell them the entirely wrong thing, falter and run away, stare silently in confusion, or just refer them to me lol

Always appreciative whenever people bring snacks to work and let her have some

Her favourite job is cutting and wrapping stuff because it's what she's best at and it makes her feel more confident in her ability

Constantly amazed by the pricing machine that just spits out price tags (me too queen) and is always so delighted no matter how long she'd been working there

I appreciate her doing her best and I don't care how many times she makes a mistake she will learn and continue as best as she can and that's REALLY what counts

Yosano:

Oh boy.

I'll start by saying that a very large percentage of my patrons are middle-aged to elderly men. Some of them are very polite and nice, sure, but there are...others.

These 'others' would not last half a second under the icy glare of Akiko Yosano. A single suspicious glance/comment at me or any other female staff would have her committing suable actions

She'd also be good at cutting stuff, but probably get a little too zealous when she gets to cut pumpkins (aka use a mallet and a giant knife at the same time)

Absolutely would answer the phone with no hesitations and be able to take orders and stuff properly without any training which is nice

BUT if someone called us asking for empty cardboard boxes or something stupid like that (which has actually happened) she would argue with them and then just hang up T-T

She should honestly be in a management position because she would be so good at that

Yosano has her ups and downs in vegetal retail. But regardless of all that, she would be like. The COOLEST coworker ever on god

Kouyou:

At first I'm not sure if she'd like a job like retail

She'd be like 'I'm really being paid minimum wage to cover my hands in rotten fruits and get verbally abused by pensioners?' (she's so right btw)

But she'd eventually get into the groove of things (probably just because she has nothing else do to) and would actually become quite good at it

She'd be good at organising, cleaning and sorting stuff out to make it look presentable

A respectful AND respectable queen who values neatness and maintains a good rapport with customers...except if they give the rest of her coworkers any shit. Then she's not maintaining as good of a rapport with customers

She's the kind of girl who would ABSOLUTELY talk shit about customers (and other coworkers ngl) in the back lmao

She would always wear gloves because she doesn't wanna get her hands dirty (I hc that Kouyou has perfectly manicured hands and does what she can to maintain them)

Would get frustrated easily though so we'd just have to try not to upset her as much as possible sksjkjfks

Gin:

I have this coworker who's not very talkative and can be a little awkward to talk to some times, but he's a literal godsend and does everything extremely quickly and to such a perfect degree that without him I am complete mess

THAT is Gin as my coworker

Also my coworker is like super nice as well and Gin would be really nice too lol

She would come off as frightening at first though. I get the feeling that a lot of customers wouldn't want to approach her lol

Might be lacking in confidence at first when she starts but she gets the hang of it quickly enough

Probably doesn't tie her hair up properly and is constantly asked about it by the manager

You would never have to ask her to do anything, she'd just be on top of it all and have everything ready

Would never answer the phone even if she were the only one there. She would probably freeze up and panic until someone else came and answered it for her (she really doesn't strike me as a phone person, because same)

Higuchi:

She is also doing her damned best and y'know what? Even if she continuously fucked up, I would forgive her

Even though I know Higuchi is actually very strong and accomplished she's still my favourite girlfailure and I love her

She's pretty good with customers but she would probably falter if one of them started getting mad at her or something (I would defend her guys)

A little bit clumsy, she might drop some things or her cuts might be a little janky, but like honestly the customers can DEAL with it. I feel like they wouldn't probably mind anyway because Higuchi is a pretty likeable person

Always sharing her snacks with her coworkers

Probably late to work a lot of the time but only by a couple minutes, and always makes up for it by staying behind after her shift ends (I wouldn't be surprised if the store actually ended up owing her some hours lol)

Really strong, so people are always getting her to help them lift/carry stuff

Leaves little encouraging/nice notes around for her coworkers because she's a sweetie <3

Naomi:

Naomi haters are gonna get so mad when I say that she'd be a brilliant coworker

We've seen how good at her agency job she is, why would retail be any different?

The best customer sweet-talker ever, would get herself and me out of any and all trouble and the manager would never ever know

Knows how to work all the machines and has memorised each of the numerical codes for each food like a walking dictionary (there's like five hundred of them fr)

Jun'ichiro sometimes visits the store to go shopping and that's the only real issue that Naomi has at work. She will drop everything to spend every second she can with her brother and it's honestly pretty annoying

If she gets overwhelmed she would forget how to do literally anything correctly and might have a bit of a panic moment

Dudes are probably trying to hit on her all the time and she might actually throw food at them I'm not kidding (and I would fully side with her)

She would also be so nice to her fellow coworkers and always encourage them :')

Lucy:

Lucy would consider this kind of work to be spectacularly easy compared to what she had going on in her orphanage and the Guild

Truly a testament to how absolutely shitty her life has been so far (sorry queen I could treat you better <3)

She's pretty good at everything, not perfect but generally quite good. An all-rounder, always getting called in on unscheduled days because she's just the go-to for everything lmao

Not that she would come in on those days, but yk

She would bring snacks for her coworkers but she would never admit it. She'd be like "You can have some if you want I don't care" while having entirely bought them for them lol

If a customer tries to strike up an argument with her or ask for something unreasonable, or try to guilt her into doing things for them (which is surprisingly common actually), they would FAIL

Would store extra stock in Anne's room (and would probably just keep rubbish from throughout the day in there to keep the kitchen clean, until the end of her shift when she can throw it out lol)

Alongside Gin she's EASILY the most valuable and helpful coworker (and also the cutest prettiest one <3)

taglist~ ♡ @gettinshiggywithit, @fyodorhatr, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl

[kyojurismo]

emergency request I just found out that a bunch of my friends who I consider close (they know numerous things about me, vice versa, and we've done multiple shows together) threw a giant party without me could I have some hcs of tengen and rengoku comforting reader after such events/throwing a mini party of their own? thank you sm,, you're a lifesaver <33

# tengen uzui

tags : gn!reader, kinda modern!au but it’s not clear lmao, comfort, tengen being the sweetest, not proofread.

a/n : hello anon, sorry it took me so long and if it’s quite short + i also apologise bc i didn’t include kyojuro but uh, i wasn’t in the mood to write for him too ( yeah i know, it sounds weird but anyway ). i hope you can appreciate it anyway, once again i apologise <3

tengen would definitely comfort you and remind you that they’re are the problem in this

you did nothing wrong

“it’s their loss, not yours. we’re gonna throw a better party anyway.”

and definitely does so

he would make sure there are your favourite food, drinks, he organises your favourite activities and stuff like that

definitely end up doing a karaoke but like acts super dumb just to make you laugh

and he’s successful, trust me

i believe he would act like it’s kind of your birthday so he even find a present for you hehe

“a special event for a special person, heh?” he would tease you and then shower you with kisses and hugs

he even asked the others to join so you won’t get bored with just him [ excuse me, sir? ]

god of festivals for a reason i guess

tengen knows that you felt bed about you don’t getting invited and that’s why he literally does his best to not only distract you, but making you forget about it completely

he’s here to seeing you smile as wide as you can

what’s the point if you’re not happy?

he’s the best ever, trust me

reblogs & comments are super appreciated! thank you for taking your time reading it, i hope you enjoyed it. have a good day / night <3

[mothervvoid]

saw this n decided that EYE was tagged

1. How many works on AO3?

168 fics + some tied up in exchanges or anonymized

2. Total word count on AO3?

637,568

3. Top five fics by kudos?

knee-deep in the morass - 1,190

cold linoleum - 911

cause for concern - 856

i'll give you my best shot - 814

itadori alone. - 686

4. What fandoms do you primarily write for?

at present i write mainly for MHA but i'll occasionally drop a new naruto fic. truly naruto was what got me super SUPER into the fic writing scene honestly, i have 69 published works for naruto atm. my first love...

im trying to dip my toes into wh40k as well but we shall see where it takes me.

5. Do you respond to comments?

absolutely!! not in a timely manner but i WILL respond!! i treasure each and every one <3

6. Angstiest ending?

im a bit of a baby when it comes to writing angsty endings but i think maybe believe me when i tell you that i'm fine? mind the tags on that one.

7. Fic with the happiest ending?

a tie between homespun and bubblegum kisses bcos they're both mushy-gross happy at the end.

8. Do you get hate?

LMAO. yeah. got hit so bad on one fic i straight up turned off comments and haven't turned them back on to this day.

9. Do you write smut?

yeah

10. Do you write crossovers?

i think abt crossovers and will construct elaborate ideas for aus such as the wh40k/mha au, the REDTAPE/mha au and the naruto/jjk au but most of them rarely if ever pan out. the only one that made it out of the drafts was my konan/uro naruto/jjk crossover yuri fic series

11. Ever had a fic stolen?

yeah

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

not to my knowledge!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

no but i would love to

14. All time favorite ship?

um oh god uh. i really cant pick just one. bakudeku, obito/kakashi, shikaino. thereabouts. probably more.

15. WiPs you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

they hide deep within the depths of my google docs bcos i dont post anything that isn't finished or nearly finished but i think abt them every day...

16. Writing strengths?

voice and banter, ideas

17. Writing weaknesses?

quality of my prose can vary WILDLY between fics or even within the fic itself, pacing issues, filling out the plot. i really, truly want to get to the good stuff, the good meaty bits but in order to get there i gotta put the sinew in and trying to do that without said sinew feeling like im rushing is very hard for me

18. Thoughts on mixed language dialogue?

very cool to me altho ive never done it myself

19. First fandom you wrote for?

young justice!! but that was abt ten years ago. all those fics are loooongg gone....

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

either my beloved go for the punch or my magnum opus back to the old house

tagging @nixalegos and @perpetuallyuneloquent ;3

[crowbasils]

6.

… OKAY so !!

I think SUNTAN shippers tend to get annoying since a lot comment on how “SUNFLOWER IS SO PROBLEMATIC!!!! ANYWAYS SUNTAN BETTER!!!!” especially those on tiktok. They also do tend to spread lies of SUNFLOWER being toxic and that they’re codependent (they’re not really??? I mean, you could interpret it as such, but please do realize that the signs are present in almost all BASIL ships as well. None of his interactions in-game are “good”, especially the ones with AUBREY. and SUNNY.). SUNTAN shippers also do tend to get annoying with like… stuff like the pinwheel placing. You could take that as SUNTAN proof yes but like… BASILHERO and stuff like that does also exist… And like, the dynamics are almost the same every time. It’s just sad wet depressed cat and happy dog. They also do tend to not acknowledge that KEL might be the one to forgive SUNNY and BASIL first. It might be HERO, AUBREY even. Just because KEL is the way he is, doesn’t mean he’ll forgive them first. Also like? Make KEL sad in a situation that isn’t just SUNNY killing himself. Please.

PHOTOBOMB shippers…. They’re actually pretty okay!! The only thing I dislike is when they call the BASIL in other ships “watered down” or misinterpreted for a totally wrong reason. I saw a take where one said that BASIL wasn’t concerned about SUNNY and instead was concerned about what SUNNY can do for him and put SUNNY’s needs second which isn’t the case. It really isn’t! BASIL was hallucinating in that fight. He genuinely believed SOMETHING was there. He wanted to protect him, because he truly believes that SOMETHING is there. BASIL is also scared of SUNNY leaving because he was one of the only ones who actually listened to his vents and rants enough to know almost everything about him. He’s panicking, and for a good reason. He doesn’t know if the truth will ever be revealed. The guilt eats him up alive everyday, the lies, the deception, it eats him up and leaves him paranoid. Which is why he acts the way he is in the fight. It’s his last chance to at least get the truth out, to see SUNNY again, but because of his hallucinations and delusions, the fight ended up happening.

That being said. I do also have a problem with the ones that don’t recognize that bullying is in fact abuse. I’m not calling AUBREY an abuser, but she Did do fucked up things. She was a horrible person, but she wasn’t evil. He’s not calm because he understands, he’s calm because he thinks the one at fault. He thinks he deserves it. He understands, yes, but that’s not why he’s calm. He’s calm because he genuinely thinks there’s something wrong with him, and that he’s the one who needs to adjust. Technically, what she did Is abuse, since bullying is considered abuse. It doesn’t matter if it was verbal abuse at first, it still counts as it. Verbal bullying is STILL bullying. It’s a pretty gray area when it comes to AUBREY, because I don’t want to be too harsh and call her an abuser, but yeah. She was a horrible person, not evil, but one with many mistakes and one who needs to actually atone. Words and feelings don’t matter without actions, much like how actions don’t matter much without the words. They need confirmation that you actually mean it, much like how they need confirmation you’re doing it because you’re sorry.

Also like. Most victims of bullying and/or abuse tend to feel for their abuser if they were previously close to them. Especially if they had a familial relationship or a friendship relationship. That’s what most people that ship it tend to not notice. PHOTOBOMB will take a lot of months, maybe years even to start communicating as close as they were in the past. They will have a phase where they have to heal. I’m sorry, but if you ship SUNTAN and PHOTOBOMB just because SUNFLOWER is toxic, you uh…. I don’t know. If you ship it for different reasons, I don’t mind, but that specific reason is bullshit lmao.

… I think I’m just a hater.

[spring-lxcked]

some notes on mr. john "jack" overton

vaguely mysterious owner who does not do public appearances (will show up pretending to be an employee or just a random person though because Ego)

very present in the pizzap.lex, which employees know, but guests never see him (they actually do, but he's quick to lie and claim he's a technician/etc)

gets away with lying about being the owner because the employees know he does this and they just figure he's a private person who doesn't like the spotlight

known for being eccentric and pretty withdrawn, but like. in a Wacky Fun Way lmao. still seems as friendly, but he's not really putting on his Classic William Af.ton Persona anymore

absolutely does not give a fuck anymore, will stab you to death without any warning just because you're alone with him and pissed him off. has only gotten better at covering up employee deaths

if you bring up william af.ton/the "stories" about the older pizzerias, he'll act like he isn't that familiar with them, but he's delighted on the inside

still has insane fashion and isn't questioned because it fits the glamr.ock vibe

long hair don't care—

not only does he make a new spring bon.nie costume (a la glitch), but at some point he like. starts feverishly working on making a new sprin.glock suit because he "has to do it"

sorry losing my mind over the idea of glamr.ock golden bon.nie. but like. a springl.ock suit. years of improving his skills making animatronics has gotten him here

"he built another spring.lock suit after getting almost killed?" we're talking about william af.ton jack overton here. also it's better built but STILL

literally has no life outside of the pizzapl.ex and his "work." will lie about this. his only thing now is rebuilding his family (or reclaiming if, for example, mike is alive)

lives in a family home with enough rooms for his kids. lives there alone. isn't there often because it's too quiet. still doesn't fully blame himself for that.

as for the pizzapl.ex being built over the PS pizzeria? shrug. without william definitely dead, i'm not sure it's likely mike would be able to move on. regardless, if the PS pizzeria exists, william DID build over it on purpose. goes down there obsessively without any real purpose because it has that connection to both michael and henry

not opposed to having van.ny kill/kidnap for him, but largely prefers doing it himself when possible

this man is teetering on the edge of sanity at all times and i'm begging you to give him that final push LMAO

glitch is fully under his control, although still a semi-sentient AI

does everything he can to hide his springl.ock scars since they're not, uh, easily explainable given how long springlo.ck suits have been out of commission

okay fun facts that are actually fun now:

has a, like, rolodex of coffee orders. was never a black coffee drinker much anyway, but enjoys the Starb.ucks experience. will pay ten dollars for coffee and then bitch about "the old days" and then order more tomorrow.

may vary by portrayal/dynamic, but generally actually likes the glamr.ocks?? like, he felt genuine sentimentality for the funt.imes, and this sort of thing extends to the glamr.ocks (particularly if he made them)

despite everything, does actually enjoy running the business and wants it to do well. i mean, this was always the case, but the man really hasn't got much else going for him anymore. something something his major goal was immortality and now he's achieved it so... what next?

definitely wants to or HAS expanded Fazbe.ar Entertai.nment beyond the Pizz.aplex. this may include other pizza.plexes, smaller chains, or just related businesses not directly managed by him

if you find a picture of william af.ton and comment on how weirdly similar they look, he'll laugh it off very awkwardly and then plan your murder

EDIT: call him jackie. do it.

[cannibalisticskittles]

General 2-4; Story 5, 10, 11, 14, and 17; Romance 1, 3, and 9; and 12 free space: a field banter with a character of your choice (hard(?) mode: not Astarion) for Amity!! (You can...pick and choose from these if that's too many, lmao)

under a cut because long

General 2. Do the other companions have special comments or reactions upon recruiting your Tav? i imagine she's recruited doing something silly/is at least somewhat in peril – stuck on the edges of the swamp behind some traps that seem to keep popping back up whenever she turns around (the redcaps are fucking with her), or caught in a web under the goblin village bc her pod crashed nearby and in her haste to not be seen, she fell thru the rotting floorboards and now she's stuck and she could burn the webs away but honestly it's a miracle that the bigger spiders haven't been drawn to her yet and that seems like a recipe for disaster, so uh, help please?

so i think more practically-minded companions – lae'zel for sure, astarion, maybe shadowheart – wonder aloud about how useful she could be, given how they've found her; the first two maybe remark that it would've been better to leave her there to figure it out for herself, lmao.  

wyll, karlach, and gale are a bit more sympathetic, and karlach just wants to pick her up and squeeze her like a lil teddy bear.

3. Does your Tav have any comments or advice when you recruit other companions? if you recruit her before astarion, she is livid on your behalf if you fail the perception roll and end up with a knife at your neck. she has incineration on her mind, like gale; unlike gale, she's too mad to be articulate: "if they don't walk away from this, neither will you."

she loves karlach right away. tiefling solidary is strong, and she knows devils well, and this is definitely a (pretty) tiefling and not a devil. she strongly advises hearing karlach out and helping her; she's extremely sad if you choose to fight and kill karlach instead. big disapproval hit there. don't fuck with tieflings. 

if she's in your party when you recruit gale, she doesn't say anything, but you quietly get a few points of approval if you slap his hand before rescuing him

actually wait there would be one reaction. if your party is full when you reboot Gail and he says he'll go back to camp and get started on stew, amity goes "fuck yeah, stew!!!"

4. What sort of general actions raise or lower their approval?

goody-two-shoes choices tend to net approval with her, no surprise there. tho honestly i think with amity, you'd be getting little 'amity approves!' notifications all the time, but then find out that they're mostly just +1s so even tho they can trigger often, it's hard to build high approval just with that. you get bigger approval for harder choices, naturally, and she does favor being good and kind, but it happens a bit less often. 

you can talk her into giving approval even if you decline the Extra Good and Generous option, as long as you present some logical/practical reason for it – sorry amity, helping tieflings is nice, but think about how many of them will die if we're too slow to remove our tadpoles and we all transform into mindflayers; greater good and all that, right?

…and you get approval when you do dumb, chaotic, fun things. like. you jump down the pit in the spider cavern without feather fall, and after withers revives you, amity says "that was very ill-advised, but in the moments before you splattered on the ground, it looked like a lot of fun!" and you get +10 approval.

you also get approval points when you're rude to/make fun of raphael or mizora, lmao. amity blatantly disrespects any devil lower than, like, a kyton in the hierarchy of devils. 

for specific actions, you get +10 approval for killing aunty ethel, even if you fuck up saving mayrina. fuck hags, all amity's homies hate hags. and also i think every single companion disapproves if you smear shit on your face when trying to get into the goblin camp, but y'know what? amity thinks that's very practical. fuck dignity, it avoided a fight, and she respects that. now hold still, she'll prestidigitate that off of you as soon as you turn the corner.

Story 5. How do they react to the Player Character taking their first tadpole power? she's a little horrified, but primarily at the idea that you willingly put that in your eye?? ouch?? and are you sure there's enough room in your cranium for another one of those suckers?? she does, however, ask that if you plan to do it again – not that she advises that, mind you! – that you let her watch and take notes. she promises to do her very best to suppress her gag reflex if you do. 

10. How do they react if the PC licks the dead spider in the Gauntlet of Shar? "oh! wow! that's – um. was that… good?" devnote: no part of her believes that could've been good. 

in response to a second lick: "oh, wow. are you okay? blink twice if you're ensorcelled and need help. no? it couldn't have been good enough to be worth it. …could it?" devnote: said in a tone which indicates almost enough curiosity to try it for herself. 

11. What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown? honestly, she's fucking delighted, she loves circuses and clowns. 

"really? me? are you sure you don't want to go up there instead? dribbles really knows his stuff, you'll be missing out! but okay, if you're sure!"

she's so excited that she's wiggling the whole time she's on stage. +5 approval at least. 

14. How does Tav react to the PC becoming a mind flayer?  Can they offer to become one themselves?  Does their reaction change if they’re romanced? the theological implications of the soul being destroyed in the process of becoming a mind flayer are… concerning – if the soul is gone, how can one ever be sure that the person isn't gone, and that the tadpole isn't just assuming the memories and characteristics of its former host?

but. the player character is her friend! (and maybe her partner, but either way – her friend!) and friendship is sacred! she's not going to let some tentacles get in the way of that!!! she's just sorry that you had to go through this, but you're so brave and kind for doing it – you've done the hard part, leave it to her to support you through this!

(a later bit of dialogue you might get is "hey, we match now – we're both purple! c:" )

as for herself – she'd want to take some time to think about it bc it is Not a decision that she'd be excited to make, but… honestly, what's lil' ol' her worth when compared to the entirety of the sword coast? so yeah, she'd volunteer herself, if need be. 

hey, don't feel too bad – she was only gonna make it maybe 40 if she's lucky, the way she keeps throwing herself into danger. hell, she's technically already died once already! and her soul was likely bound for the wall of the faithless when she died, so what's it matter if this destroys her soul now, right?

(this is not going to help her self-esteem issues AT ALL – people might distrust tieflings, but they REALLY distrust mindflayers – but She Will Do It)

((if you're romancing her and ask her to become a mindflayer and break up with her, she isn't even mad. she gets it. if you still want to be with her, she full on cries. says you don't have to do that, there's a better path for you out there; it's a whole thing.))

17. If romanced, how do they react to the Dark Urge trying to kill them in Act 2? i will be fully honest here: despite only doing like 10 minutes of a dark urge run so far, i get the impression that most companions… do not take the dark urge particularly seriously. even if the dark urge is upfront about everything and full on confesses "hey, i crave murder, i'm pretty sure i've done lots of murder before, and i want to do more murder."

amity would. she'd be tossing out suggestions on what to do and trying to get everyone on board – and if she couldn't sway anyone pre-alfira, she gets very serious about it post-alfira. everyone takes turns being on watch? they set up the alarm spell around the dark urge? …little bells on their ankles?

so i think in a sense she'd be prepared. she'd have to believe that the dark urge isn't in control of themselves in order to keep going after alfira, so therefore, she believes that whatever urge is driving them is both very powerful and likely to crop up again.

…unfortunately, amity Needs Sleep. she functions poorly on less than optimal sleep, and once she IS asleep, it's very difficult to wake her up and she gets combative if you try. if the dark urge tries to wake her up to warn her, they need to make a dex save to avoid either a fire bolt or a stray fist thrown their way. (it's okay if they fail tho, her aim isn't great when she's sleepy and she only has 9 strength.) 

dark urge has gotta get thru her grumpy-at-being-woken up phase before she's even close to coherent enough to understand what's going on, but when they do – she's ready. as ready as you can be for something like that, anyway. 

"you – now? shit. okay, we can handle this, we can – hand me my bag, i've got materials for a warding spell in there. you good long enough to find somewhere private, or does it need to be now-now? –shit, clearly it's now-now, okay–"

dark urge wakes up and she's all smiles. "hello, dear heart! you went down pretty quick, had me worried! slipped a pillow under your head, but your noggin might still be sore in the morning sorry. oh, not up for a chat? that's alright! i'm here anyway! :)"

i think some of her encouragement would be drawing on gleeful spite –like "hey, think about how pissed off this urge is gonna be that you've managed to fight it so far – i bet it's livid, haha. and look at you, you're managing it anyway! i knew you could do it; you're doing so well!"

and then she sits at the ready, telling silly stories of ways she's fucked up on adventures or of neat things she's seen until the dark urge is able to sleep

she's lightly dozing when they wake up but she's mostly sitting up – it's clear she's tried to stay up and keep watch all night. 

as she dismisses the wards, she throws some suggestions at them – consistent alarm spells around their cot at night? her knot-tying is pretty good, they could rely on that each night if spells don't seem like enough? well – no, that's not how she meant if, but if that's how you take it, she's not necessarily opposed to… wait, we're discussing important business here, save that for later!

and she passes them something from her bag and it's a sending stone. "annnnnd if you feel like there's something you need to tell me but you can't say it out loud for whatever reason, or if I'm not there, though honestly how often does that happen – well! this'll give you a direct line to me, even without the tadpoles :)"

sending stones as a gesture of love yet again (also she never travels anywhere without at least one set of sending stones on her. she has learned how valuable they can be)

Romance 1. Is your Tav a romanceable character?  Are there any specific requirements to romancing them? i think she would be, but it would be sloooooow going. so slow that players aren't always certain that they're correctly triggering it at all, damn it, where'd that guide go?

you've got to get her to be genuinely vulnerable with you, which is. difficult! she has self-esteem issues. and self-image issues. and she has issues with touch – simultaneously touch-starved and touch-repulsed (thanks a lot, hag curse, for fucking up the progress she'd made on that). she wants to be with someone, but oh, gods, is that frightening.

you have to tread carefully with her. lay it on too thick, and she thinks you're fucking with her (or just being nice, but either way, she believes 0% of it). gotta build a LOT of trust first. honestly, her friendship path and her romance path would be absolutely identical for at least the first act. sleeping with someone at the party wouldn't lock you out of that – you go have your fun! she's going to creep away soon for some air. it's lovely that everyone is having fun, but it is a bit overwhelming. but no, don't worry about her! …no really, don't worry about her, haha, she's definitely not going to slip away while you're not looking because she's having another bout of insecurity. 

you just have to talk to her a lot, and not be too mean – it doesn't even put an end to things if you're a little mean, bc hey, that can be kind of funny. but, y'know. don't shut her down. she warms up to you fast on a surface level, but you have to give her time to actually open up and not be so skittish. 

3. Are they a polyamorous or a monogamous option? she'd happily agree to either, honestly! she has Experienced Love for more than one person at once, before, but she feels no pressing need to seek that out for herself; as for the player character, i think she'd want a bit of reassurance that anything else they seek isn't bc of dissatisfaction with her, but then she's open to it, whether or not she herself is involved!

bonus; a field banter with a character of your choice  post-waukeen's rest – 

amity: wyll! wyll ravengard! wyll: that is what I've been called a time or two, yes. why? amity: i can't believe i didn't recognize you before! you've changed some, sure, but even still! wyll: had we met before? i'm sure i would have remembered you. amity: not exactly! more like… occupied the same circles? i was too shy to go to all those fancy parties as myself; once we'd made it past the entryways, i usually hid away, or disguised myself with a spell, if i couldn't find anywhere secluded. wyll: ah, a shame – i think we would've gotten along famously, you and i. amity: i'd like to think so! anyway, i got myself… banned from all of those events after some particularly unwelcome hijinks, so it only lasted a little while.  wyll: banned? there was a time when little wyll would have been dying to know how to do the same; i never could manage it. always dragged along to every meeting and soiree father had to attend. what exactly did you do? amity: ah – a lady doesn't kiss and tell! they may consider me too uncouth and unkempt to be much of a lady, but even i know that! wyll: now i must know.

and later – 

wyll: potions of fire breath in lady edmonton’s mead.  amity: uh-uh. wyll: frogs in the central fountain.   amity: not me.  wyll: otto's irresistible dance on the younger lord laurier? amity: gods, i wish, he was always such a prick – but no.  wyll: it was quite funny to see him flop about. let's see… replacing lady belmont's prized panther with a displacer beast? amity: did someone do that? really? i missed that one. and i'm pleased you think i would have been able to manage that.  wyll: stealing the left shoes of all attendees while they say for a feast? amity: no – well. i don't think so, anyway? sounds like something i would've done. so maybe. possibly. probably? but that's not what did me in.  wyll: hmm… [snaps fingers] the chandelier! amity: yes, you've got it! wyll: ha, i knew i would, eventually. amity: ...i do feel bad about that one, honestly, i really thought it was going to hold up against a few swings.  wyll: from what i'd heard, it did not.  amity: it did not.

[rigginsstreet]

So uh. I don’t think I have an answer for you exactly, but I do have some information? Idk.

I don’t like talk shows, but I do watch soap operas. Yeah, like some grandmother from 1984, whatever. Anyway, my dad asked me several weeks back how exactly they continue to run new episode amid everything going on, so I looked into it. Evidently actors on soaps are covered under a different contract than like nighttime television, streaming, and film people. So their contract is not under negotiation at present. However, many employees are non union employees, particularly their writers, so they continue to generate new content, thus the show can go on indefinitely.

Mysteriously I can’t really find current info, most of this is from like two months back or more.

Anyway, where I’m going with this. The same contract for soap opera actors covers pretty much all daytime television. I mean, news continues to run, obviously. I was also wondering when I saw drew barrymore was coming back, so I looked up the whole ordeal and to me, it sounds likely that they are basically going to emulate what soaps have been doing this whole time. As in, actors can be on daytime and talk shows no problem, and they could use non union writers. Still kinda unclear despite everything, but that’s what I’m getting.

You mentioned other talk shows as well. So the talk, also on cbs, has been on hiatus since the start of the strike, I think. But I think it was mostly in solidarity. Whether drew is actually crossing lines, I’m not 100% sure, because as you said it’s all pretty garbled right now. I think people are just thinking it is a change from previous views the show expressed and a bit disrespectful given the current situation. And maybe since she’s like a film star who just these past few years has a talk show? But essentially, other talk shows and soap operas have been operating under the same conditions this whole time.

Sorry, that’s probably not actually helpful. Yeah, just, sorry. I saw you talking about network television and latched on full force. I somehow have a massive headache and probably missed the point that I’m actually trying to make.

my mom and grandma are huge days of our lives fans (and my mom also watches general hospital) so i know all about the soap contracts lmao

but yeah i was reading through the comments on the insta post drew posted about continuining the show and all the comments are talking about how shes crossing the picket line and and they were organizing a strike outside the studio she films in today so everyones acting like she's doing something bad but from what i can tell... she isnt? technically?

because if the daytime shows are the ones that have different contracts and get to bypass the strikes, and the night shows arent, why back in the 2008 strikes was it fine for all the shows to continue on without writers? conan had like whole slots of time dedicated to being like "well we have no writers so lets do stupid shit to fill time". he wasnt crossing picket lines.

im sure many discussions were had before she decided to carry on with the show and i doubt anyone would have encouraged her to cross picket lines that would just be terrible pr

somethings afoot here it is very garbled like you said lol

[foli-vora]

danger! high voltage

A/N: So uh, I don’t know. I thought my threesome lactation fic was the filthiest thing I’ve written but uh... this might take the birthday cake. Absolute fucking filth. It’s all my favourite things, and some fun extras, thrown into one long ass piece with my newly favourite 6′2 military himbo as a present to myself so... happy birthday me lmao. ENJOY ANGELS!

Dedicated to the ever wonderful @charnelhouse​

Pairing: Rick Flag x metahumanf!reader

Word count: 4.3k

Warnings: swearing, obs it me. THE SUICIDE SQUAD SPOILERS (a few scenes from the movie but nothing detailed) SMUT 18+ ONLY. Jesus okay—slight dom/brat vibes, fingering, hand job, electro stimulation, oral sex (f receiving), titty lovin’ (rough handling/pinching/biting), choking, spanking, unprotected p in v sex, rough sex, overstimulation, hair pulling, semi public sex, spitting, anal play/fingering, creampie, cum eating... (if I’ve missed anything, let me know!)

I blame this on the yellow tee + cowboy hat combo. Also, this is my first time with Rick and the DCEU so uh... sorry lmao.

+++

Fucking yellow.

Yellow.

And eight sizes too small—not that you were complaining. It was the stupid hat that was doing it, though. Why did it look so fucking good? You find yourself tossing up what you prefer, the stupid hat and tee combo or the downright delicious vision you were greeted with when you found him—

Before. It was hard to feel remorseful for the unnecessary… brutality unleashed on the camp when he’s walking around like… well, like that. A damn treat. You should put in a word with Waller—no more shirts for Flag, and you’ll do whatever fucking bizarre mission she throws at you no questions asked. 

“Colonel,” you greet with a sarcastic little two fingered salute when he’s in ear shot, eyes flicking over his bare torso with a lick of your lips. “Lookin’ good.”

It’s all playful. It wasn’t the first time you’d had Flag on a mission, and poking him was something you’d taken an extreme liking to. He was a good sport about it—not like the other toffee nose higher ups that were too good for a bit of harmless banter. He wasn’t above chuckling at one of your shit jokes, or accepting comments about his appearance with a polite nod of thanks. 

Now is apparently not one of those times. He shifts, brows pulling together into an almost apologetic wince and the resistance lady beside him whirls on you. She scoffs in what seems like disgust, eyes narrowing sharply at you before she breezes past without a word.

Your gaze follows her before you blink in surprise, turning on him in question. “What?”

“Not really the best time.” Flag mutters, eyes falling on the blood and bodies scattered around the camp.

You frown defensively, following his line of sight. “Well I didn’t do that.”

He levels you with a look that just screams ‘bullshit’ and you grin, yielding with a little shrug.

“I didn’t do all of that. I did that, and that one… and those over—you know what? It doesn’t matter. It was a team effort and, I for one, think we should be commended on such a great execution of teamwork.”

You let your comments settle in the humid air before snorting, back of your hand slapping softly against his bare chest. Damn. Firm.

“Get it? Execution? I saw that smile, Flag, don’t fuck with me.”

Current. —it shouldn’t look as good as it does. On anyone else, it would be fucking ridiculous. It does look ridiculous, you decide. He just… fucking pulls it off. You follow him into the club, warming when he pauses to let you walk ahead, his palm firm and hot on the low of your back as he guides you along.

A greedy hand lands on your wrist, dragging you towards the dance floor, and you’re sneering into the face of a complete stranger, uncaring as his hands falls from you while he gives a shout of pained surprise, hand raw and blistered from the currents you had just delivered to him. 

You miss Flag’s own curl of his lips, his eagle eyes watching the man all but run away clutching his skin. Though you often called your… talents boring, him recalling you pouting about not being able to throw lightning bolts or mess with the city grids, they came in handy. You were like a mini taser, delivering just enough shock to kill, to be useful in the field—to Waller, anyway. He was just happy to have you on his team, zaps or not.

“Here’s to being alive in three hours!”

You snort, but raise your glass anyway, grin wide as it knocks softly with the others. Conversation flows with the more drinks that come to the table, giggling at Polka Dot Man’s adorably lame jokes, dancing in your seat when Sebastian crawls up your arm and starts to look like he was throwing his little furry arms up in the air to the music, Cleo cooing into your shoulder about how he likes you.

The group eventually parts, and your smile is easy as you watch the team on the dance floor, heart surprisingly warm considering they were complete strangers and only knowing them a short while. They were nice. They deserved a little fun, a little respite. You stick to the table with Flag, content with his company for what could be the last time.

“You can’t handle it.” He grins, head tilting as he appraises you from across the table and you suddenly can’t remember the topic of conversation, mind racing to catch up.

Something had been building around the table, the air slowly getting thicker, and while you originally thought it was just the night getting humid, you think maybe not the more his gaze falls to rest on the neckline of your stupid little sundress the resistance lady all but threw at you.

You didn’t mean to kill her men—it was like she’s never heard of a mistake. Christ.

Despite the low flames of attraction that had been burning for Flag for an almost ridiculous amount of time, indignation flares within your chest and you straighten in challenge. “I can handle anything.” 

He huffs, lips lifting into a grin and then his eyes find you from under the rim of that stupid fucking hat, something stirring in them that had your stomach falling to the fucking floor, heart lodged and beating heavily in your throat.

“Could you handle me, sweetheart?”

What? He did not just say that. 

Fucking—

“Any day, Flag.” You return confidently, resting against the back of the booth while your fingers run along the smooth bottle, tips collecting the small beads of condensation and smearing them across the glass as you tilt your head. “But the question is, cowboy… could you handle me?”

His tongue runs along his bottom lip and you follow the movement with darkening eyes, his low drawl soon following, “I’d like to find out.”

Shit yes. “...would now be out of the question?”

You can see he thinks about it, eyes falling to his watch before moving to survey your surroundings, to where the team are all dotted about and then he stands, smirking curling his lips into a charming little half grin. “We’ve got time.”

There’s a line for both bathrooms, and by the looks of the many couples interlocked in the queues, you weren’t the only ones in need of some privacy. Flag pauses, eyes quickly looking around before he rams his shoulder against a locked door to the right of him, grin wide as it gives in easily under his strength and then you’re being ushered in. 

He keeps there, face lingering so fucking close, almost teasingly so as he backs you into the room and kicks the door shut behind him. It rattles violently against the frame, a bit splintered from the violent entry but otherwise stays firmly shut, and finally you’re alone.

It’s a managers office, or something along those lines, with filing cabinets and a sturdy looking metal desk sat in front of blind covered windows you assume looked out over the bar. You see it all from your peripheral, but worry you’ll break whatever fucking trance Flag’s thrown over you if you break eye contact for even a second.

“You sure about this?”

“Are you?” You fire back, brows raising.

Unspoken words hang between you before something in the air just snaps, the both of you meeting in the middle in a messy kiss, uncaring when teeth clash in your hurry to get to the other or when the stupid hat knocks against your forehead, hands moving to grab whatever they could on the other. You’re stumbling back and soon feel the dig of the desks edge along your thighs and hop onto the surface, legs widening for him to step in between.

A hand cups and tilts your face, thumb brushing along your jaw before moving down, fingers slipping the small buttons of your dress through their loops before your chest is bared to hungry hands, rough palms sliding along your heated skin and tugging at the cups of your bra until it slides enough out of the way for your tits to be bared to the warm air.

The hands that move in on the flesh start soft, but soon turn harsh when his fingers pinch and pluck at your nipples, your quiet groan of approval at the rough handling encouraging more aggression, and you arch further into the touch when he pinches and twists them slightly, your gasp eagerly being swallowed by the hungry mouth working against yours. 

Eager to play, your hands dive for his pants and dive in, humming in appreciation when you find nothing more in the way of your pursuit of feeling him as your fingers wrap around his hard cock and pull him free from his pants.

The low moan that reverberates into your mouth when your hand starts to move is downright fucking sinful, and you chase more of them as your thumb swipes along the weeping head of his cock, smearing the bead of precum along his skin before reclaiming your grip, free hand falling to gently massage his balls.

A thought hits you in your haze of being swept away by his glorious fucking mouth fighting against yours, and you briefly wonder if it’s something you should try. It’s something you’ve done before, practised and perfected to not burn any skin, just enough energy to deliver some fun little surprises. 

You keep it light, barely there. A little shock—nothing too noticeable, but it’s enough to make his mouth stutter against yours, and your eyes snap open to watch the twitch of his brows with a small wave of amusement. His eyes stay closed as you pull away, but the frown remains, deepening when you repeat the zap through your palm, only just a little stronger this time.

“What—”

You hush him softly, taking his bottom lip between your teeth and sucking on it softly. “Relax.”

“Fuckin’, Jesus—” He jolts in your arms at another longer, little zap, bucking into your grip, and you laugh sweetly against the hot skin of his throat, tongue sliding along and tasting the tang of sweat and dirt hanging there.

“Not quite, cowboy. Think you could handle a little more?”

You move at his nod, keeping your grip tight as you jerk him while every now and then delivering little shocks, ranging in length and intensity. He likes it. You know by the way his frown twitches, the way his eyes crease along the edges...

“Shit wait, I-I’m gon—”

Like hell he was going to disappoint—

Scoffing quietly, you tighten your grasp and smirk slyly up at him, lashes fluttering. “‘Wait’? But this is what I want. Cum for me—Colonel.”

One last sharp zap, mixed with your sultry coo of his title and unforgiving jerks of your hand, rip through him and he buckles in your hold, face crumbling as his high crashes over him in unforgiving waves. You chuckle softly against his lips as he floods your fingers in heavy spurts, his cum hot and sticky as it catches under your touch and slides along his cock.

You keep going, even as he softens in your hold, squeezing and milking him until he’s spasming, his hands quickly landing on your arms in a firm plea for relief. Pulling your hand away, you keep your gaze locked with his darker one as your tongue moves across your palm and hungrily along your fingers, sweeping up the streaks of his cum left on your skin with an appreciative hum that has his eyes narrowing.

He drops, knees hitting the floor while his hands fight with the hem of your dress, soft fabric slipping through his grip in his hurry to get it the fuck out of his way. The dress survives, but your panties don’t—the stitches holding the seams of cotton together tearing as he rips them down your legs, his teeth clenching in irritation when they catch over your calves.

“Easy, cowboy.” You coo down at him, slipping back to rest on an elbow as your licked fingers flick the rim of the hat playfully.

He huffs softly in amusement, breath fanning over your exposed pussy and you shift on the table, legs widening further. You flood with heat the longer he stares, so deliciously open and exposed all for him. Fingers dance along the inside of your thigh, drawing steadily closer until they ghost over your glistening folds, up and down, teasing in their movements while you whine impatiently.

“You’re a fuckin’ pretty little thing.” He murmurs in his low drawl, eyes flashing up to meet yours, fingers parting and smoothing along your slick pussy until his fingers zero in and circle your swollen clit. “You want more, baby?”

“Stupid question.” You huff sarcastically, lips twitching when he grins.

“You and that smart fuckin’ mouth.”

His fingers move away from your clit and push into your wet pussy, curling deeply against your walls and patiently searching, probing, until he finds that sweet little spot that makes your thighs twitch. A hum of victory and then he’s moving forward, open mouth hot and heavy as it lands on your pussy, tongue lapping where his fingers disappear into you before hungrily gliding up and rolling against your clit with a quiet groan, that stupid fucking hat knocking and rubbing along your lower stomach, hindering your view of him.

Lips lock around the nerve and then he sucks on it sharply, tongue flicking unforgivingly over the surface while his fingers start up, steadily thrusting deeply and continuously hitting something so fucking good you feel yourself hurtled halfway to a peak already. 

“Fucking h—” your sentence evaporates into a sharp gasp, head falling back while his mouth works you over, his fingers moving with lewd squelches as his tongue and fingers work your pussy harder. You can’t help but grind into it, pushing back against his fingers and face as something deep in your core starts to churn and twist, tightening with every rabid flick of his tongue and curl of his digits.

He feels it coming, can feel the way your thighs start to spasm and shake where they hang and cradle his face. It pushes him harder, something in him desperate to see what sounds your smart mouth makes when you’re completely shaking from pleasure he surrounds you with, drowns you in.

Your breathless chant of fuck, fuck, fuck reaches its peak when you do and, for a split second, everything hangs in a timeless void and you float hazily between stars, mind wiping clean with no knowledge of where when how, before a flare of heat explodes in your core and you come violently crashing down with a dizzying cry that has his ears ringing.

He feels the buzz of your powers through your system as you shatter, a pleasant charge moving through his fingertips as fluid gushes around his fingers and coats his chin. Your pussy clenches violently around nothing as he rips his fingers away and locks his hands around the tops of your thighs, fingers unforgiving as they dig into your flesh, dragging you tightly against his mouth before his tongue buries itself in your pussy, coaxing your body to give him fucking everything—

It throws you into the heights of another, prolonging the ecstasy already pounding through your veins and twisting it into something deeper, stronger, the depths of it reaching out and curling over you, clawing at the backs of your eyes until tears form and spill down your cheeks. Whatever spills out of your mouth is jumbled and incoherent. A mixture of pleas, voice mewling coos of more, p-please, so so fucking close—

Blackness overtakes the edges of your vision as you outright implode, a flow of charged energy shooting from your hand as it knocks against the desk lamp and shatters the glass to complete pieces, your body twisting and arching and shaking on the desk as he still keeps going, mouth hungrily taking the fresh wave of arousal that coats his tongue, content to stay exactly where he was and push you to your fucking limits.

You ride it out, voice breaking into pleading little whimpers the longer he stays locked against you, ravaging every little gush and twitch until he breaks away with a ragged gasp of his own, chest heaving as his tongue runs along his lips, back of his hand catching whatever his tongue doesn’t.

Panting towards the ceiling, your lips twitch into a well-fucked little smirk, voice breathless, “I underestimated you, Flag.”

He grunts, standing and stretching his tall frame over you, briefly pausing to lick and bite at both of your tender nipples before continuing up until his face is mere inches from yours, eyes fiery. “For once, just shut your fuckin’ mouth.”

Your mouth opens to deliver a sharp retort, but fingers are shoving their way in before a single word can even form. The tangy taste of your arousal floods your mouth and you moan lowly, lips wrapping tightly around his fingers, tongue dancing along his calloused skin as he slides them softly in and out, watching the way your lips thicken and pucker with his leisurely strokes.

The challenge swirls in your eyes, and it’s ultimately your sly little eyebrow curl that has his fingers pushing deeper until they’re down your throat, your brows creasing while a whine falls from your throat as you fight off the urge your muscles have to contract and flex around the intrusion.

“You’d take my cock so well.” He mutters in quiet admiration, grinning at your little mhm of excitement. “Not today, sweetheart.” Lips press against your temple in a silent apology when you make a noise of complaint, running soft open mouth kisses along your skin until he hovers just next to your stretched lips. “I know. One day—just not today.”

His fingers slip from your mouth, a string of saliva spilling across your chin, and then his mouth is over yours, open and breathless as he coaxes your tongue to move along his. You knock the damn hat off his head, tangling your fingers in the short dirty blonde hair at the nape of his neck before tugging it, ripping his mouth away from yours and letting your lips breeze over his with a teasing coo.

“Fuck me, Flag.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

His hand disappears between you, rubbing the head of his thick cock against your sensitive clit and then moving, probing your still fluttering pussy and sinking in, face dropping to bury into your shoulder. He’s tender, hips careful in their strokes, almost testing the waters before he pulls away to check, eyes flickering over your face. Finding no pain or discomfort, he thrusts forward, hips meeting yours with a violent slam that has the breath leaving your lungs in a sharp gasp—

“Hold on.”

You almost want to scoff, but then he’s moving. Your hands scramble to find purchase on something, anything, while he drills into you, ramming so fucking hard into your pussy you start to slide up on the desk and away from the fury of his hips.

This apparently starts to annoy him after only a minute, his body ripping away from yours with a snarl before hands are grabbing your hips and dragging you up and off the desk, spinning you around and letting your front slam against the metal top, dress soon being flung over your ass and leaving you spread and on display.

A sharp slap rings around the room and you yelp in slight surprise as your ass cheek starts to throb with the immediate after effects of the strike, skin tingling with a thousand little bites. Your eyes find his over your shoulder and he grins darkly, smug, rough fingers digging in and massaging the tender flesh.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while.”

You smirk in return, shaking your hips ever so slightly against his touch, “Oh? Is that all you got, Colonel?”

The next is much harder, your toes curling in your boots as his palm lands harshly on your ass, your lungs barely getting a full inhale before his cock is pushing into you again, your pussy clenching around him when he aims another two to match on the other cheek. You feel his palms against your skin, squeezing and pulling at your ass cheeks and you know he’s spreading you to watch where his cock disappears, engulfed by the wet heat of your pussy as he starts to move.

It’s not long until the brutal pace is back and he abandons the little show in favour of keeping you pressed against the desk, large hand resting on your head as he tears into you, urged on by the moans you make when he hits that borderline painful limit within you. Your pussy coaxes him back in greedily every time he pulls back, and he’s weak to fight the pull of it, eyes slipping shut as workers harder, pouring weeks of pent up irritation and anger into his thrusts. 

His hand stays splayed on your head, keeping your face pressed harshly up against the cold metal desk, hips violent as they pound into yours from behind. You can’t help the wrecked little whines falling from between your lips with the harshness of his actions, ears ringing with the slap of flesh. His other hand splays across the bottom of your spine, heel of it digging into your flesh in time with his thrusts to keep the momentum.

You feel the brush of his thumb moving lower, cautious, curious, and you damn near melt through the fucking table—

“‘s okay,” you pant, eyes rolling. “Do it.”

He pauses his movements and you don’t know whether your cry is from him stopping the brutal thrusts or relief that you get a break, but it soon melts into a gasp when you feel a drop of spit hit between your cheeks, sliding down down down until his thumb rubs it softly over the puckered hole sitting above where the tip of his cock sits buried within you.

“This okay?”

Wrecked. He sounds fucking wrecked, voice almost non-existent between his sharp pants for breath, and you briefly wonder what’s doing it to him. Was it the workout of driving you into the metal; stubbornly motivated to keep you whining and boneless beneath him in some display of dominance? To prove that he can, and will, handle you wherever and whenever you’d allow him?

Or was it that you were so eager to let him do as he pleases? The fact that he had you bent over a desk in the middle of a hostile environment, spread and open, knowing anyone could just walk in and see how fucking filthy you are—all for him.

You’re nodding against the desk, sweat slicked skin sliding across the surface as you try to grind back on him, the only thing you could conjure rasping from your throat in a tangled line—more, more, more…

It’s slow, the movement of his hips starting up, just keeping to shallow, barely there thrusts while his thumb presses into your tight hole, sliding it in and out, softly pressing deeper and deeper until it’s buried fully in you and you’re whimpering into your arm.

“Please R-Rick—”

You’ve never called him that before. It breaks him.

The feral growl of “Fuck.” is all the warning you get before he’s moving again, thumb fucking and stretching your ass in time with the aggressive slam of his hips and you arch on the desk, head falling back as he drills into you further. Fingers grasp at your hair and pull, sharp and unforgiving, forcibly arching your back further until a hungry mouth could meet the soft flesh of your throat.

Teeth melt into the curve of your shoulder and you cry out, fucking yourself back against him as the hand holding your hair moves to wind around your throat, fingers tight and unyielding as they squeeze, and you’re just fucking done.

The hand slowing your oxygen supply, his thumb brushing deeply along the soft, sensitive walls of your ass, along with the bruising pace of his hips and the overwhelming ache of him hitting your cervix builds until you’re physically trembling in his hold, face creased and sweaty—

Lips brush along your throat, “That’s my girl.”

You shatter at the words, hands scrambling to hold onto his forearm wound tightly around you as his hips stutter, your pussy clenching so fucking violently tight around him along with the increased shockwaves of your powers shooting through his cock has him quickly following, his low growl of f-fuck melting into your throat as you sharply cry out, tears spiking your eyes.

The next time you meet the desk is a lot more gentle, his hands soft as they rest you down before removing himself completely from you. You vaguely hear him shuffle around the room before a cool wet cloth is carefully running along the swollen folds of your pussy, providing slight relief with the sting of cold before it warms against your body. 

“That better have been clean, Flag.” You mumble, face buried in your arm. The smile that curves your lips is soft when he chuckles quietly in return.

“I think it was.”

You make a low noise of disgust, nose curling at whatever the fuck could be on that cloth, while arms wind around your torso and help you stand straight.

“You alright?”

You hum, swaying slightly on your feet. “Fucked outta my damn mind. Good job, Colonel.”

He doesn’t get to reply—

“OI!” It comes sharply through the door. DuBois. “You finished yet? Or are you tryin’ to fuck this whole thing up?”

+

Tags: @infuriatinglyoptimistic @221bshrlocked @blueeyesatnight @januarystears @madhattervanessa @runic-belova @vvola13 @mrscrain-x7 @panemedited @southside-otaku  @lacontroller1991 @xoxabs88xox @h-hxgirl @whoopsiedaisez @witchygagirl​ 

[venenatd]

just friends; eren jaegar x reader

summary: you and eren are best pals and have both recently be dumped. so, a plan to get over your exes is needed! what’s better than going out on the town trying to find quick fucks >:) also eren is a smug bastard but kinda has a heart of gold??

content: smut / nsfw 18+. minors dni. (choking, unprotected sex, creampie drinking, drunk sex, possessiveness ig? dirty talk, both of them want to be dominant tbh. slight size kink, oral both m and f receiving. female bodied reader) 

i am new to this pls let me know if i should add anything!!

word count: 5.8k words of unedited content 

a/n: uh so i never thought i’d be back on my tumblr bullshit at 23 but hey after years without the app i’m back. i needed to get out the h-word and this is what happened. enjoy and i’m sorry if it’s terrible lmao

“You look different” 

Frowning at the man waiting ever so patiently for you on the sofa, you look a little defeated. “Is that meant to be a compliment, Eren?”. He sighed, raising his eyebrows at you. To be fair, maybe you did. Wearing a figure hugging black dress, that definitely just hid your ass cheeks, hair styled and sprayed in place, dark lipstick and makeup on your face. Usually Eren would have seen you in sweats, always running a little late for class, snack in hand. 

“Different isn’t bad,” he offered, checking the watch that lay on his wrist, “are we ever going to get to the bar? Your plan will fall through if you’re not careful.”

Ah, the plan. Both you and Eren were newly single. In your final year at university, having managed to keep each relationship going until almost the end. Ironic. Weren’t most meant to fail in the first year? But alas, your partners had decided it was the end within a couple of weeks each other, and as you and Eren had been close since you met on orientation day, you each took to the other for comfort. You had done the crying first, going to him the minute your call with the ex had ended. Leaving wet splotches on his shirt, he had calmed you, only for you to do the same to him later. Now the crying was done, it was time to move on, and what better advice to follow than getting under someone to get over another?

“I just need to look hot enough for a guy to fuck me.”

“What a romantic you are.”

“Shut up Er-”

Eren shifted from the couch, interrupting your usual sass, “and what about me, y/n? Do I look beautiful?”. He threw in a wink with his comment, his aura of cockiness always radiating. You rolled your eyes, before studying his figure. His dark hair half pulled back into a bun, the rest draping his neck and onto a deep emerald green silk shirt, with the top few buttons loose, tucked into dark pants. A ring on each hand, fingers with chipping black nail polish, and to top it off, a thin chain on his neck. You hated to admit it and add to his smug demeanour but... the man did look good. 

“Gorgeous as always Eren,” you said sarcastically, even if it was truthful, “I’m sure there will be a queue of women who are wanting to jump on you.”

“Not if they aren’t all taken already,” he taps at his watch. Whilst the two of you had already been drinking as he waited for you to get ready, it was definitely on the later side.

“Order the uber, and we can go.”

Walking over to him and adding shoes to your outfit, you present yourself before him, a cute little smile playing on your lips. He’s staring down at his phone, quickly going through the motions for the ride. Finally, he looks up to catch your eyes. His jade pupils flick down slightly, and he hopes you miss that they land at the cleavage you’re sporting in your current get up. He flicks your nose, earning a scowl from you and a smile from him.

“You look perfect”

The club is far fuller than you both expected, dance floor and tables taken up and crowded round. Luckily, you had managed to secure you and Eren a pair of seats at the bar, and you were currently on your third..? Fourth drink of the evening. Green eyes watch your lips carefully, as you finish the vodka and lemonade. 

“So, anyone take your fancy?” he prompts, looking around at the mess of people.

Humming, you scan the area. There’s some people you recognise from class, but plenty more you don’t know. Fucking friends seems like a bad move, even in your tipsy state, so you look to the strangers faces. They don’t look like him. Ugh. 

There’s a few options though, and as you point them out to Eren they come with brief descriptors: dark hair and stubble, wide set blonde. He tuts at the options, sarcastically letting out a “sure sure, I see the appeal”. 

“And how about you, anyone you like the look of?” you ask with a sigh.

Christ, Eren thinks to himself. It’s been long enough that he hasn’t had to look for someone else. Sure there were attractive people in the world, but with her around, he hadn’t needed to give anyone else a second look. His palm moves to the back of his neck, stretching out behind him with a huff. “Let’s look on the dance floor?” he offers, clearly not as eager as you were tonight. Moving his hand back down, he holds it out for you, pulling towards the throng of people.

He looks effervescently cool like this. Shirt open, hair starting to fall from his bun. Eren is looking around at the people surrounding the two of you. The two of you had been working in circles, allowing each other an eyeful as the club goers move around the space. As a group of guys push their way from the dance floor to the bar, you get shoved towards Eren. Heels were never quite your forte, and you stumble against him, hands on either side of his chest. Grinning down at you with that smug little smile that annoyed you so much, Eren brought large hands to your waist, pushing you away a little. But his hands stay there as he continues to sway to the music, making no effort to break the contact. And so you bring your arms up to his neck, allowing his movements to carry you on time to the song. For the first time in the past couple of weeks, you feel light. Your chest isn’t constricted by some foreign weight. It’s just you and your best friend, buzzed and free.

Colours change above you, as you look up to Eren, him down to you. A playful grin takes his lips as he pulls you a little closer, you so easily accepting the narrowing distance. Your black silk meets his deep green, chest pushing into his. You carefully analyse his features, seeing if he attempts to check you out like earlier. 

Was it the alcohol making your cheeks so warm? Lit up by a purple hue, you watch his eyes return to exploring the crowd, his hand still holding on to you. His smirk falters, his eyebrows creasing together. You’re not moving in circles anymore, Eren pausing in his movements as he thinks about what to do next. He shouldn’t lie to you, but seeing your ex at the bar would really harsh the night. Under his fingers, he can feel your body tense, suddenly unsure at how close the contact between you was. 

But Eren doesn’t want you to know, he doesn’t want you to be distracted by your ex tonight. He doesn’t want to see your hurt little face anymore. The way your eyes would be red and puffy the next day. The way he would feel your shoulders heaving under his arms. You don’t deserve that. Hell, you didn’t deserve the huge amount of shit your ex had put you through over the years he’d known you. Eren would sit back and listen to you rant, support you where he could. But fuck that guy. And he wasn’t sure what sparked in his chest, but Eren’s jade orbs are trained straight back on you. His eyebrows calm, tension releasing from them. As you can turn to scope out whatever had changed his body language so suddenly, he catches your jaw. 

Beginning to slowly move again, his eyes have narrowed, taking in the way the dress hugs you, the shine on your skin from the hot dance floor. Eren couldn’t quite figure out what was intoxicating him right now. Definitely a lot of alcohol, but also a sudden… possessiveness. He didn’t want you in pain anymore. Eren wanted you in pleasure. His breath is suddenly on your neck, making your hair raise. 

“I’ve only seen one person I’m interested in tonight.” 

“Oh?” you squeak, before clearing your throat a little. The new deep notes in his voice catch you off guard. It almost sounds like he’s… No. He’s your best friend. The little looks you’d been giving each other all night were just two people looking out for one another, two people seeing each other happy for the first time in a while. Your voice is calmer as you ask light-heartedly, “and who would that be?” 

His lips are so close to your ear. 

“You.” 

“Eren-” your hands move from behind his neck, resting on his shoulders. You need to see your best friend's face, you need to know if he’s joking right now. If he’s mocking you. When you draw back, you see his face. Smug, as always. Fuck you’ve always wanted to knock that cockiness down a peg. Cheshire smile showing his teeth and his eyes looking down at you. Half lidded eyes, pupils blown. He’s not joking. Fuck.

“Can I kiss you?” 

Your breath is caught in your throat. All too aware suddenly of each of his finger pads pressing into your skin, the contact feeling like fire with the added alcohol. But, you find yourself nodding, the yes just escaping your lips before he’s pressed into them.

Large hands travel to your hip, and up your back, pressing you into him. You can feel his body, tense in exhilaration against you, hands back around his neck. One travels up to the nape of his back, tangling into his hair and pulling him deeper into you. The music is all consuming, you can feel the bass in your body, you can feel Eren against you, you can feel the adrenaline coursing through your veins. 

Eren’s hand on your back travels up, echoing your placement on him, to hold the back of your neck. He doesn’t want you to go, you feel too good. The heat between your bodies could suffocate him. His thumb puts pressure under your jaw, he isn’t even sure you can feel it. But he can, measuring your pulse racing underneath the pad. He’s smiling into this kiss, this all consuming kiss.

His tongue swipes at your bottom lip, and you’re all too eager to allow him into your mouth. Tasting the whisky from your home, tasting the coke from the club. His teeth take your lip nipping slightly, before sucking the plump of it into his mouth. You both come up for air, eyes meeting in acknowledgment of the situation.

“Wanna get out of here?”

The drive home had only served to heap tension between you. As clearly that it was that you wanted each other, you would have to wait a while longer. Your thighs pressed together, slowly inhaling and exhaling. Going through your mind was whether this was a good idea, staring out at the city passing by you. Eren was your friend. You were dating another man two weeks ago. The same man that had previously asked you if he needed to be worried about Eren. You’d laughed it off, because it was Eren. You were brought out of your thoughts when you felt him grip your leg, a little too harshly at first, before settling, leaving a gentle pattern of circles and lines on your inner thigh. It was Eren.

Just one hallway. You had to make it one hallway to get into your apartment. One hallway left to come to your senses. And just like he read your mind, Eren is once again touching you, just his hand on yours pulling you backwards. You twist just in time, his hands instantly cupping your cheeks as he kisses you, deeply and intensely. Pushing you back into the wall, you pray a neighbour doesn’t walk out now. His knee is pressing gently between your legs, and you allow it. Your fingers sink into Eren’s arms, lightly covered by the fabric yet you can still feel the muscle underneath, relaxing and tensing as he pulls you closer. 

His lips are making their way to your jaw, lifting your chin upwards, tentatively licking the bone before moving downwards still, sucking and nipping and licking your neck. A whimper breaks through. You really need to get inside. Gripping his hair, you sharply pull backwards.

“Not going to play nice, huh?” 

When did he speak like this? The playful and shit-eating grin your friend Eren always wore was replaced by something darker, his words laced with intent. 

“Don’t challenge me.” 

You were off, finally at your door, making quick work with the lock, moving in first before he followed. The door shut as you pushed Eren against it, usual doe eyes being taken over with a deep lust. Your hands are instantly at his belt, as his hands find your face once again. This time he’s grabbing your hair, making you look up at him as he glares down at you. You’re constantly challenging one another in conversation, and it’s translating to the bedroom far too easily. 

Lips are on one another again, as you leave the belt and start towards his shirt. You bite down on his bottom lip, earning a hiss from him, and you feel his hand being brought around your throat. He doesn’t add too much pressure, checking if this turn is indeed okay with you. When you push against the weight, he takes the gleam in your eye as a yes, and uses the force to push you against the next wall, finally moving off the front door. 

It’s a constant battle to get to the bedroom, both of you taking control for short bursts. Eren pulling the thin straps of your dress down, you untucking his shirt. His muscular torso is on full display, and you had never viewed it in this light before. 

Finally he pushes you onto the bed, situating himself between your legs. Your kisses are sloppy and infused with alcohol. Hands are desperate with one another, both of you needing to be closer. Are you scared if the contact ends your thoughts will return to sanity? 

Eren’s hot and heavy over you, his hands seem everywhere at once. Smoothing up your thigh, digging in slightly to the flesh when you grind against one another. His hands rest at your hips for a moment, and he’s looking down at you, still fucking smiling. All at once, he’s flipped you over his prominent hard on pressing into your ass. He’s whispering in your ear, leaving wet kisses along your neck, to your shoulder blades. Fingers take the zip at the back of your dress, slowly and carefully pulling it down, leaving licks and pecks as he goes. It’s torturous. 

You attempt to speed things up by rutting your ass against his crotch, and you think you hear a quiet moan, before his hand is brought down to the fabric, smacking your cheek. You gasp, turning your head to look at him. Eren is too occupied in taking in all of your body, his green eyes are darkened with authority and lust. His nimble fingers play with the short hem of your dress, thumb dipping beneath, before he pushes the silk up. 

You both let out soft fuck’s, as his hands grab at the plump of your ass. It’s like he’s testing the softness, the way your flesh responds to his touch so easily. He slaps at you again, earning a sharp moan from you. Eren’s leaning down, his mouth once again trailing across the apex of your behind, leaving trails of saliva as he goes. Before you can even register the new sensations you can feel a soft pressure against your clothed cunt, just enough to let you know the presence of his hand, but not enough for you to get off on. You’re mewling, once again trying to get closer to him. This time he allows it, eagerly pressing his ring and middle finger to your clit, allowing you to grind upon them. 

Seeing you underneath him like this… it’s new and strange and so fucking hot. He’s watching you desperately try and fill the need building in your core, and he can only feel his cock twitch in his pants as he sees you coming undone. If you wanted more, he could definitely give it to you. Bringing his large hands away, to the flimsy fabric that was covering you, he pulls it down, exposing you to him. His heart and dick fucking jump. His hands return to your ass, watching the jiggle as you move and whimper. Spreading you, he brings his face down, breath tingling on your most sensitive areas.

Your breath catches in your throat as his tongue, gentle at first, licks between your folds. He’s tasting you, he’s moaning into your pussy, as you write beneath him. Eren’s hands are squeezing your ass cheeks, holding you still as you try to grind against his face. 

“Patience, y/n”, he says, with a slap on your behind again. 

“Fuck you,” you hiss. 

“You will be in a minute, baby girl, don’t worry.”

You go to make a retort but he’s instantly back, licking up your slit and a deep moan escapes you. Jesus you can feel the smile on his lips as he’s back on your pussy. Eren is so proud of the sounds he can draw from you. He wonders if your ex could make you come undone so easily. 

You taste sweet and saccharine on him, and he doesn’t hold back the groan as he further works his way into you. Hardened tongue moving it’s way from your entrance down to your clit. He swipes at it, before moving away again. Kissing your thighs, kissing the skin between your holes. Every now and then he’ll move back to your clit, allowing you a moment of pleasure before he’s teasing again. “Fuck, please”. Your whines are being smothered by the sheets, and Eren wants nothing more than to hear them, loud and clear.

Eren’s ringed fingers make their way to your hair, his face lifting from between your legs. He pulls you back round, and holy shit you can see how wet you are on his face. There’s a sheen to his lips and chin, and instinctively you reach up to his neck, pulling him back on top of you. Your tongue meets his, tasting your tartness on his mouth. A hand makes it way back down in between your thighs, playing and parting your folds. Your hand in turn reaches up his neck, pulling sharply at his hair once again. “Eren. More- please” you get out in between staggered breaths. 

“Aw, since you asked so nicely” his eyes watch your expression closely as his thumb rests on your clit, his finger swiftly moving inside you. Your eyebrows raise and knot, eyes wide and lips parted. But he keeps it still as your legs shaked around his arm. “Eren, move” you demand this time. 

“Oh, that’s not so nice. I liked it when you were polite.” He starts to retract his finger, thumb gently swabbing your clit so you’ll know what you miss.

“Please, please, please, Eren, please” you speak before he even gets the first knuckle out. All the teasing was creating a tightness in your lower stomach. 

“Much better.”

You whine as he continues to pull his finger from you, until he pushes it back in, curling his solitary finger up. Your fingernails are pressing deep into the muscle of his bicep, feeling how it moves as he finger fucks you. He’s hitting that perfect spot inside you again and again, and his thumb is swiping eagerly on your clit. 

Eren can feel you fluttering around his finger, desperate for more, desperate to release on him. He adds another finger, your wetness allowing him entrance easily. He wants to fuck you so bad, his cock so hard it felt like it was about to burst. 

He pushes your hands off him, leaving crescent moon indents deep in his skin, he works his way back down. He brings the black silk with him this time, fully being able to take in your body as you’re left naked before him. Holy shit you’re beautiful. He doesn’t want to stare too long and make you shy. But he still kisses his way down, before he’s back at your pussy. 

This time he allows you more movement, letting your fingers work their way back into his hair, letting you roll your hips against his tongue and stubble. 

With his spare hand he pulls out his cock, slowly pulling at it, before he realises he can’t do that for too long without cumming before the main event. Instead he reaches up, rolling your perked nipples in between his fingers. There are so many sensations on your body, and Eren can feel your cunt beginning to tighten around his fingers. You hold your breath before letting out little moans, building towards reaching your height.

“You want to cum on my fingers?

Your back is arching, whispering “yes, yes, yes, please” as your walls are tightening around him. He quickens the pace, making sure to hit that spot inside you over and over. Thighs around his face, he can feel your slick pooling in his mouth, and coating his chin once again. 

Your gummy walls are so tight around his thick fingers, he needs you to finish, watch you fully unravel below him. Sucking and licking at your clit, he’s pushing you towards the edge. 

“Eren-” his name is strangled coming out of you, and then your moaning, undulating your cunt against his mouth, riding out your orgasm. 

His jade eyes look up at you, watching as you pull your head up to look at him, before another wave of pleasure hits you and you have to arch your neck and look back up. He waits for you to come down, letting you fuck his face and fingers. Grinding against his stubble and tongue as you let out pitiful and beautiful moans. You’re so fucking wet, the sounds coming from between the two of you should be forbidden, as you release onto him. 

Finally he withdraws, using his forearm to wipe his face. He lies next to you, allowing you a moment as he draws little circles on your stomach. Eren has never quite looked at you in this light. Sure, you were pretty, and the two of you were obviously close. But now you’d walked a line that couldn’t be undone. You weren’t over your ex, and as okay as Eren was with what had happened between you, he didn’t want you to run. He’s overcome with thoughts, looking down to your chest and the heavy breaths you were taking. All he could pray was that you weren’t pretending he was someone else. 

But as Eren is getting caught up in his own mind, you’re twisting, hand reaching to his crotch, cock having been recaptured by his boxers. Palming him, you feel how big he really is for the first time. Fingers trace the edge of his pants and underwear, and he lifts his hips, allowing you to pull them down. Shit. His dick slapped back to his stomach, precum leaking from the top of his pink head. He was bigger than you’d imagined, because of course you’d imagined it a couple of times.

Your hand looks so small around his cock, but you slowly tease him, his deep green orbs following your movements. Bringing your head down to him, you kitten lick the precum from the top of his dick. He hisses gently, and you look up at him with these big doe eyes, so fucking eager to please.

You push your lips around him, hollowing your cheeks and flattening your tongue as you begin working along his shaft. He moans just at the sight of you, your eyes peeking up through dark lashes. His hand goes through your hair, eagerly pushing you deeper around him. 

He lets out a hoarse, “is this okay?” before you put your own hand on his pushing it for the both of you. You don’t even want to come up for air, you just want him close to you, inside you. 

You were learning far more about each other than you had expected, as Eren takes back over. He pushes himself further into you, muttering a good girl that has you whining. The vibrations around his cock make his hips buck, and now you’re gagging as his length hits the back of your throat. He holds you there instead of letting you off, and your nails are sharp against his thighs.

His head lolls back as he starts to move his hips under you, moving you in turn with your hair. He picks up the pace quickly, allowing saliva to drool from you and straight to his cock. 

Your eyes prick, big fat tears forming at the corners. But you’re enjoying this way too much, the moans and gasps he gives make you moan, pressing your thighs together for some kind of friction. 

He takes your jaw in his grasp, allowing you a moment to catch your breath. Your tongue sits out your mouth, him smacking the head of his dick on it. He notices your tears then, the mascara that’s running a little. He swipes at the corner of your eyes, leaning down to press a kiss into your forehead. 

Bringing you up to him, your dripping folds sliding across his length. His lips are on your cheeks, across your jaw, licking up your neck before reclaiming your plush lips once again. You continue grinding against one another, tongues slipping in and out of each other's mouths. Eventually Eren brings his hands to your hips, lifting you up as you hold his shaft up.

Your foreheads are pressed together as he slowly pushes inside you. The stretch is burning and all-consuming, eyes pricking up again as you feel him hit your furthest wall. Eren breathes out heavily, “So fucking tight”

You roll your hips, allowing some friction from him on your clit. It helps your muscles relax a little, and balancing your hands on his shoulders you push yourself up and down, using his length for your own pleasure. Eren’s eyes don’t leave your form, watching your breasts bounce and how your eyes flutter close as he fills you entirely.

“You really did want to be fucked, huh? Look at you” he teases you, watching as you go to talk back before he thrusts his hips up. It leaves the words caught in your throat.

His pace maintains, holding you in place as he fucks up into you, feeling your cunt clench around him. There are long moments where you hold your breath, holding his cock tight within you. Then you’ll release and moan, before holding it in again. Well, Eren is all too happy to help you with that. 

One hand grabbing the flesh of your hip, the other wrapping around your throat, he pushes into you at a punishing rate. Your eyes go wide at the sudden restriction of your throat, feeling the cold metal of his ring against your pulse. 

“Who knew this about you? That you were such a slut?”

As much as he knows you want to deny it, you want to smack the smugness from his voice, he can feel your pussy tighten around him. He sees your eyes roll back a little. 

“You’re getting tighter.” 

The hand on your hip moves down, attempting to hold you in place whilst letting his thumb press over your clit. The sounds of him slapping against your wetness is obscene, and he’s only distracted from it as you whimper out pathetic yes’s and please’s. 

“You wanna cum?” he’s grunting, trying to keep the pace going until you can reach your peak.

You nod against his wide hand, still tight around your neck. “Oh you can do better than that. I already know how bad you want it, slut.”

“Please Eren, please make me cum. I want to cum, please, please, please” you can barely make out the words, your head going light and body tightening.

“Cum for me.” 

You release, and as he can feel the fluttering of your walls around him, he lets go of your throat. The sudden oxygen as you cum leaves you overwhelmed. Burying yourself in his shoulder, he fucks you through it. Cock slapping up into your cunt over and over, somehow being sucked deeper in as you coat his length with more of your own slick. He can feel your nails breaking the flesh of his back as you’re holding on for dear life, moaning his name and even a fucking thank you into his ear.

As you begin to slow, legs shake as you stay straddled over him. He flips you, Eren now firmly on top, slowly moving in and out of you. The stimulation is intense, your cunt sparking at any sensation. 

Caged between his forearms, his hair is a mess thanks to you. You push tendrils back past his ears as he leans down to kiss you once again. This kiss is different. It feels… less desperate. It feels deep and meaningful, caring even.

Your eyes meet in acknowledgment, both of you too worried to speak about the shift in tone. 

He reaches down instead, pulling your leg up and splitting you on his cock. A tongue swipes at your nipple, biting and playing with each as he gradually picks up pace again. You’re still so fucking wet it’s easy for him to thrust into you at a dizzying pace. You can feel all of him against your gummy walls. Each time he passes that special spot inside you, you moan and gasp, and it’s the best sound he’s ever heard.

His thrusts were becoming more primal, holding your thighs close around his hips. Letting your sweaty bodies collide again and again, his balls slapping against you. The grunts and moans coming from his lips were so infuriatingly erotic. Eren just wanted one more from you, and then he’d let himself finish. If this was to be a drunken mistake, so be it, but he would at least make it memorable. 

Those jade eyes were on you once again, the power and dominance radiating from the immeasurable. He can see you barely being able to hold on, completely fucked out beneath him. You’re moaning and whining, hands moving over the swell of your breasts and playing with your nipples as if it’s going to keep you grounded. 

He sits up, eyes flicking down to where you were conjoined. It took so much restraint not to cum inside you right then and there. Your glistening sex was so tight around him, the wet slapping noises echo again and again. You’re pulling and sucking him in, cream pooling around his length. 

“Give me one more, y/n. I want to feel you cum on my cock.”  

You try to look up at him through heavy lids. Your friend Eren saying this is so taboo. The words he’s said tonight so far from normal for the both of you. You flutter around him, somehow your pussy still wants to be fucked, still wants to push you off the edge one more time. You can feel the coil inside your stomach tightening. 

Eyes rolling back, you can barely keep it together anymore. He’s pounding into you at a startling rate, fingers flicking over your clit again and again and again. 

“P - please, it’s s-so good.” 

Your breaths between words were quick, “you’re so big-”

“Yeah you like that? You like being so full of my cock? Such a pretty face you make when you’re all fucked out.” 

Holy shit.

Eren could tell how much words affected you, your back arching and legs pulling him somehow closer into you.

“Come on, baby. I wanna hear those moans.” he’s grunting, getting so fucking close to losing himself in your cunt. He knows what he wants to hear most though, “say my name. Tell me who’s treating you how you should be”

With that, you’re losing yourself around him again. Writing on the bed, gripping sheets in tightly balled fists. White light taking over your sight as you clench around Eren. This orgasm was the most intense, taking your body by surprise in its overstimulated state. You weren’t even making a noise, just holding on to the high for as long as possible. 

And then you shattered, whining and moaning, whispering his name over and over again. 

As you moved underneath him, Eren kept his punishing pace up until he watched you expel the last of your energy. Name forming on your lips over and over again he falters, releasing inside you. You can feel the stickiness inside you, the sensation of being filled up. Eren watches for a moment as he sees the white pearls forming around your stretched out pussy.

His chest is back on yours as he kisses your neck, shoulders, whatever skin he can. Thrusting back into you a couple of times, he finally pulls out. You feel his cum dripping out of you, but you’re too spent to do anything about it.

Eren lies next to you, both of your bodies attempting to regulate from that. 

“You okay?” 

He’s checking in, making sure he didn’t go too far with someone he genuinely cares for. 

You nod, turning to meet his stare. Giving him a drowsy smile, you’re not sure what comes next. But for now, you’re happy. Curling into his side, he puts an arm round you and lets you rest for a while. As he notices your breathing become deeper, he nestles into you, muttering something about clean up. 

Moving away from you, you can make out some noises of a tap, drawers opening and closing. In your sleepy state you feel him gently wiping at you, two glasses of water being put on the bedside table. Finally he makes his way back to you, and Eren notes how cute you look. Hot and completely fucked out, yes. But also gentle and at peace, allowing the heaviness of sleep taking over.

He rests behind you, wanting to be back in your warmth. He pulls you in closer, wrapping an arm around your waist. The fragrance of you takes over his nostrils, and he’s all too eager to move closer to your hair, pressing one last kiss at the nape of your neck. Whatever tomorrow brings, he hopes it’s not the last time he gets to be this close to you.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 315: I Didn’t Expect This to Blow Up

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “guess which plot that you thought was dead is actually not dead and is making a comeback!” and we were all “EVIL HPSC??” and he was all “girl you know it,” and that’s the story of how we got a sexy Lady Nagant flashback with lots of guns and murder. Flashback!Lady was all “gotta murder peeps to preserve the people’s trust,” but then a little while later she was like “actually wait that makes no sense,” and so she shot her evil boss and they sent her to jail. Back in the present, Deku was all “okay fair, the hero system might in fact be a little fucked up, but hear me out... have you considered not helping AFO take over the world so he can murder like a bazillion more innocent people??” The chapter ended with the not-all-there Overhaul finally revealing himself to Deku, and I honestly have no idea where this is gonna go.

Today on BnHA: In what is unfortunately the single worst plan ever concocted by anyone in BnHA, Nagant is all “I’m going to try and get this Deku kid to panic and freeze up by putting someone in mortal danger.” Deku is all, “[doesn’t panic and freeze up at the sight of someone in mortal danger].” Nagant is all “omg no way.” Deku, who is now all of a sudden being so OP that even I have to acknowledge that it’s OP lol, is all “[smashes Nagant’s gun arm to bits]”, which sucks but is also really cool, and which also apparently makes Nagant decide that she actually likes this kid after all. Deku is all “NAGANT I REALLY LIKE YOU AND THINK YOU’RE GREAT SO PLEASE JOIN UP WITH ME AND STOP BEING EVIL.” Nagant is all “aw shucks (✿ •͈ᴗ•͈) well okay then” and everyone is all “( ･◡･) ✰ ( ˆᴗˆ ) ( ᵘ ᵕ ᵘ ⁎)” and then Nagant FUCKING EXPLODES LIKE AN EGG IN THE MICROWAVE AND FALLS TO HER DEATH!!!! except not really because Hawks saves her??? In conclusion, (a) THE FUCK, and (b) AFO TURN ON YOUR LOCATION I JUST WANT TO TALK.

so I have to tell you guys something, which is that barely ten minutes after I made that “please don’t send me spoilers” post the other day, someone replied to the comments in a stunning fit of “tell me that you’re twelve without actually telling me you’re twelve” energy and posted what seemed to be the copy-pasted spoiler summary from reddit or twitter or whatever lol. so here is my good news/bad news rundown of all that

good news: I have very well-conditioned ABORT!! reflexes and have trained myself to immediately look away from the screen (usually in dramatic fashion) as soon as I realize that whatever I’m reading is a spoiler

bad news: unfortunately as I was subsequently deleting said comments, I accidentally read the very last one

good news??: said spoiler was so unbelievably, absurdly over-the-top that I’m almost positive this person was just trolling. like, there’s just no way lmao

bad news: but in the unlikely event that it is true I will absolutely lose my shit I swear to god

(ETA: “NAGANT DIES.” that was the spoiler I read lol. like, literally all I read from the person’s comments was “My Hero Academia Chapter 315 Title: “Beautiful Words.” Chapter starts with...” and then I noped out of there, and then of all the comments to read as I was deleting, it had to be that one lol. I seriously was just like “SURE, JAN.” all “just how gullible do you think I am” sob. but I was wrong. a troll, but an honest troll they remain.

but anyways like I’m pretty sure Nagant isn’t even actually dead lol, so in the end this whole little adventure doesn’t even have a point to it, but for me it was a journey!)

anyway, so there are apparently two versions of the chapter today?? no idea what the difference is, but I’m going to go with the Bean version, because it’s the one at the top and I don’t feel like making decisions today

huh, so Overhaul is actually more coherent than Horikoshi was letting on

look at him having a whole back and forth conversation with her. side note, how is he still this jacked when he’s been sitting in a cell doing absolutely nothing for the past six months

anyway so he says he’ll go with her on one condition. I wonder what that condition could possibly be. do you think it could be the thing he literally hasn’t shut up about ever since he reappeared lol

yep! and damn -- maybe this guy will surprise me after all

still would be nice if you also felt a bit sorry for the little girl you tortured and traumatized, but this is something at least. maybe Deku will yell at him for that other stuff lol

(ETA: also can’t help but wonder if he wants to make amends because he put him in a coma, or because his plan was a failure and ended up destroying the family. just hoping you’ve finally had that “hurting other people is bad” epiphany dude.)

anyways so now Nagant’s arm is transforming again, and this particular transformation happens to be the only truly unsexy thing that Nagant has done thus far so I’m just gonna skip right on ahead lol

aaaaand we’re back to the delirious ranting

buddy. just. read the fucking room, guy

wow she really is aiming at Overhaul, then. those theories were spot-on

damn she’s really out here all “it really fucks with kids’ heads when you kill people right in front of them and make them blame themselves” like yo

I’m picturing her saying all this in a very loud stage-whispery tone while making very significant eye contact with Deku lol

uh oh but wait

um. okay. who’s gonna tell her. Nagant I might have some bad news for you about the kid you’re trying to capture here. specifically about the way he tends to do the opposite of what you’re thinking that he’s about to do

holy shit

so it’s basically just “tap x repeatedly to charge up your attack” lol

and okay, so that’s cool and all, but is anyone else wincing at the thought of what that must be like on his knees. oh to be young

anyway, but so to the surprise of basically no one, Deku did not, in fact, freeze. I am very sorry, Nagant. he’s just like this

LMAO

someone wanna tell me how getting yoloed in the fucking ribs by this fucking slingshot kid moving at literal sniper bullet speed is in any way even remotely better than getting hit by the bullet itself lol

(ETA: this is 10x funnier now that we know the bullet wasn’t even gonna hit him lmao.)

anyway so now Nagant is having an extended “!?!?!?” reaction about how Deku just moved with no hesitation, and I’m starting to get an inkling of fear that the rest of this fight isn’t going to go very well for her and maybe that’s what all the “hoo boy” is about

oh my god Deku are you about to Gomu Gomu no Rocket yourself at her you insane little man

now Three is popping up again and he’s all “I see you’ve learned your lesson and are now only using three quirks at once instead of five” like with all this effusive praise about how great and badass Deku is and sob, okay, yeah. this chapter is basically one of those machines that shoots tennis balls at people, except instead of tennis balls it shoots hot piping discourse

OH MY GOD

YOOOOOOOOOO but also, NOOOOOOOOOOO

lol oh my god it’s literally two opposing reactions at once wtf. do I love this or hate this. like just for once can Horikoshi actually let a badass lady character win their fucking fight without getting their arm ripped off, BUT ALSO fucking look at that absurdly cool “SMASH” onomatopoeia though. it looks like it’s about to float right off the page holy shit that’s some seriously good art

anyway so is this really the end?? do I need to break out my ಠ_ಠ faces

lmao okay yeah I can definitely see how this would piss a lot of people off

he basically one-shotted her and she’s all “damn this kid is so amazing that I’m about to do a complete 180 turn on all of my previous angst” lmao. Horikoshi is really shounening it up today

on the plus side though, maybe this means there’s still a chance for her to join up with him after all? unless that spoiler was true lmao, then all hell is gonna break loose

YESSSSSSS

OH MY GOD AND HE SAYS THE BULLET WOULDN’T HAVE DONE MORE THAN GRAZE OVERHAUL ANYWAY, wow, I’m actually more relieved by that than I would have expected. I mean I would have forgiven her either way, but it means that there was still more hero in her than she was letting on

YES!!! FUCKING YES, THANK YOU

lol but I mean, it’s also like, “oh so today they get to have brain cells”, thank you so much lol. sometimes it’s really hard to tell which times we’re supposed to question these character decisions that seem dumb, and which times we’re just supposed to full on embrace them and switch off our critical thinking

but okay, so in this case it really was Nagant going easy on him on purpose, and not just her fucking up for no good reason even though she used to do this for a living and was the best in the game. and I know in this case it’s probably just Horikoshi giving us some consolation headpats to soften the blow of her losing so abruptly, but you know what, shit. I’ll take it

also you guys the light is coming back into Deku’s eyes again for just a moment here and I’m having feels about it?? the way it still comes back when he’s reaching out to save someone, and following his own hero path instead of the much darker and lonelier Christopher Nolan path that’s been laid out for him instead that he never wanted?? it’s both reassuring and also very sad

YESSSSSSSSSSS

DO IT LADY OMG PLEASE?? PLEASE COME BE HIS NEW IRRESPONSIBLE ADULT SUPERVISION YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO

AHHHHHHH SHE’S GONNA DO IT AHHHH

p.s. I am now absolutely scared shitless that that spoiler was actually true sob. swear to god, I will throw this manga into a fucking volcano. but we’re almost at the end of the chapter and this seems just WAY TOO GOOD to be true fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck f

UCK

NOPE NAH SEND IT BACK, NOPE, NUH UH, DIDN’T ORDER THIS. “GULLIBLE” OKAY FUCK YOU?? “COUNTERMEASURES” NOPE, DON’T NEED ‘EM, WE’RE ALL FINE HERE. WE’RE ACTUALLY GOOD SO YOU CAN JUST GO, OKAY. PLEASE

fuck, lol, I don’t wanna do it. I don’t wanna scroll down what have I ever done to deserve this oh my god

WHAT THE HONEY-ROASTED FUCK

WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT FUCKING VOLCANO IN ICELAND THAT I KEEP SEEING ALL THESE PICTURES OF. WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT. LET’S GO

ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW

can someone please give AFO a really good, sharpish kick in the balls. just really let him have it. I’m so tired, what the fuck

-- ARE YOU KIDDING ME LOL WHAT

bro. I was literally going through my Excel folders to find the spreadsheet about female characters in BnHA that I made back when Midnight died. was gearing myself up for a wholeass rant. and honestly I might just let all of that continue simmering on low to keep it warm just in case lol, because to tell you the truth I have absolutely no idea what’s happening right now

my girl straight up does not have a face. she used to have a face. people usually need those, idk. like, even if she’s alive, her gorgeous eyebrows are definitely not making it out of this and I’m gonna throw a funeral just for them

how the fuck did AFO just blow her up?? how did he know what was going on?? and if he had a quirk that could explode people at will, why is this the first we’re hearing of it?? you’d think that might have come in handy at Kamino or Jakku, like what

(ETA: present!me, who’s had more than three hours of sleep and can now actually remember facts about the series, would like to remind past!me that AFO gave Nagant a quirk, and so this is probably just more Vestige shenanigans now on his part. that’s also probably why Air Walk suddenly stopped working out of nowhere. still doesn’t explain why he doesn’t go around blowing people up more often though but maybe he thinks it’s gauche.)

Hawks just straight up out of nowhere. just Mirioed his way straight into the chapter just in time to be too late sob. here I was looking forward to seeing your face when Deku showed up with his new best friend. can’t believe Horikoshi deprived us of that moment

on the plus side, WELCOME BACK, HAWKS’S FEATHERS. I have no doubt that in this chapter of Deku being an almighty threequirk-mastering god, and Nagant losing anticlimactically only to be immediately blown up because girl characters in BnHA can only be cool for one fight and one fight only, there are still some people who are focusing solely on the “how dare Hawks get his wings back when he is a MURDERER this is an outrage what about CONSEQUENCES” discourse, and to hell with all the other discourses lmao

anyway, so yeah. wow. and now it’s just occurring to me that maybe the real reason why Overhaul is there is so he can get a head start on that amend-making by actually doing a good thing for once in his life, and using his quirk to heal Nagant. assuming he can still do that

and so now Horikoshi has got me out here actually rooting for Overhaul. you know what, on that note I think I’m just gonna go ahead and call it a day sob

[juletheghoul]

Oblivius Chapter 6

So I'm thinking next chapter will be... a big one.

You cannot know how happy I am to see all your comments and reblogs and messages and general kind words about how this story is making you feel. Love y'all. Keep asking! Keep messaging! I want to talk about this all day lmao.

Likes & reblogs are appreciated

Frankie Morales x F!Reader

Pairing: Frankie x F!Reader

Word Count: 2.1K

Warnings: Angst, slow-burn, yearning, 18+ language (Please let me know if I forget anything)

Masterlist Series Masterlist Prev Part Next Part Playlist

--------------

Age: 20

“Why did you even ask me out Frankie? Do you even like me?” She was embarrassed, walking towards the door.

“Yes of course, I wouldn’t have asked you if I didn’t.” He tried to walk it back but she was incensed, her cheeks burning bright with anger. She rounded on him when she got to the door, making him step back slightly from her onslaught.

“When you invited me over to meet your friends I didn’t expect to be ignored so you could flirt with her. Get your shit together Frankie, I’m not gonna go out with someone who’s too busy pining over someone else to notice me.” Her eyes were bright with un-shed tears, if she expected some sort of answer or explanation - he had none.

He watched her go.

“Everything okay Francis?” Spills had come looking for him.

“Yes, everything’s good. She had to go.” He had a big smile for her when he turned around.

“Will she be back?” Thankfully she hadn’t heard them.

“I doubt it.” He couldn’t be too sad about it though, not when she looked up at him like that.

——————

**Present Day**

He could still feel her wrapped around him as he walked to the shore. Could feel her moulded to his back, her legs on his waist. He had meant every word he’d said to her, he would gladly stay there with her forever.

“How was the water babe?” Claudia kissed him when he lay on the towel next to her to dry off, wrinkling her nose slightly at the water that trickled from his hair onto her face.

“Beautiful.” His eyes were on Spills, floating in the water. “You should take a dip.”

“No thanks, I’m perfectly happy here. Can you get my back babe?” She smiled up at him but he wasn’t looking at her, his eyes were trained on the water. “Francisco?” She had to tap him to get his attention. He tore his gaze away to face her.

“Sorry babe, yes of course.”

You can’t keep doing this Francisco. Get your fucking shit together and focus.

“You okay fish?” Pope's voice startled him slightly and when he turned to look at him his expression was serious. “You seem a little… distracted.” His eyes quickly flashed towards Spills floating in the water.

I never should have told him.

“I’m fine.” His voice was clipped, he really didn’t need this right now and he hoped his tone was warning enough. Pope didn’t say anything but he had a feeling he’d hear about this later.

“I wanna ask her out.” Benny had sat down beside Frankie and was staring out at Spills.

“You should! You guys would look cute together, wouldn’t they babe? We could double date or something.” Claudia was happy at the prospect but Frankie's stomach dropped. He felt the anger crawling in his gut, tensing his muscles at the prospect of Benny with her.

This isn’t normal, I shouldn’t feel like this.

“I think you should, Benny.” Pope clapped him on the back. “Fish - I think you should put in a good word for our boy.” It was hard for Frankie not to lash out but why would he? He was engaged and Spills was free. What reason could he possibly have to not want this to happen?

There’s only one reason why, and I can’t fucking help it.

“Yeah of course. I’ll talk to her.” It took everything in him to keep his voice neutral.

“Only ask her out if you’re serious, don’t bother if you’re going to fuck around because that’s his friend, she’s not a random.” Will chimed in, ever the voice of reason and Frankie was thankful.

“I know that.” Benny smiled, and Frankie had to keep quiet.

----

Everything was quiet. Your ears were submerged as you floated peacefully in the water, eyes closed. The ocean always managed to make you feel safe despite its size. Maybe that was what appealed to you, it was so vast and unknowable, you could get lost in it.

You saw the shadow obscure the light despite having your eyes closed. Pope was in the water with you and you smiled at him. Of all the army friends Frankie had introduced you to, Pope was the most mysterious. He guarded his words and you had the sense that he knew way more than he let on.

“Did you have anything planned for the bachelor party yet?” His question dropped a boulder into your stomach.

Fuck, I forgot about that.

“Nope - hadn't even remembered until you said it. I have no idea how the hell to plan one.” Your eyes widened at the thought of it and he laughed, not unkindly.

“I figured, I can help you out. He’s a simple guy - but I'm guessing you already know that. I’m guessing you know much more about him than we do in a lot of respects.” He was smiling at you but there was something underneath his words, a tone you couldn’t discern.

“Probably - known him a long time.” It felt like you were under the microscope.

“Years worth of stuff that Claudia doesn’t even know.” His eyes were burning into you and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was gauging your reaction.

“In all likelihood, but she’ll learn eventually I imagine.” Your voice sounded a lot calmer than you felt.

“Obviously no strip clubs, that’s not his thing. Just get all his friends together and get him drunk.” He was watching you closely but your eyes were focused on Frankie, he was laughing and happy - talking animatedly with Will about something and you couldn’t help but smile.

“I can see how much you love him.” Your eyes flashed towards him. “Like a brother, right?” He raised his eyebrows at you and you felt the colour drain from your face.

Am I that fucking obvious?

“Yeah… like a brother.” You were lying, even when you were younger you knew you’d always loved him, but it never felt brotherly. He knew. “See ya.” As much as you wanted to be in the water, you couldn't handle the scrutiny anymore and you made your way back to shore.

---

The rest of the day was spent mostly in your head, you tried to focus on the conversations you had. You tried to focus on the water and the sunshine but it seemed like Pope’s words and his implications followed you.

“You okay Spills? You’ve been distracted all day.” You’d been on the road for almost half an hour and you’d barely said anything.

“Yeah - sorry, just tired. Need a shower.” You smiled at him weakly.

“You sure? Seems like you have something else on your mind.” He glanced over to you and your heart swelled. His curls were defined from the salt water, his face was a little pink from the sun and he looked so warm and soft. You ran your fingers through his hair seemingly without thought. It was so soft and you had to fight the urge to keep touching it.

“I’m okay Francis - gotta plan your bachelor party.” You couldn’t keep the sadness out of your voice, hoping it came across as tired. You were both silent the whole ride home.

--------

You never would have thought it, but you were glad to be back at work. It was the one place that had no memory of Francis. You could come in, completely focus your energy and forget everything for most of the day. In all the time you worked there - you’d never been this productive but with the wedding slowly approaching, the anxiety was slowly creeping in.

Nowhere was safe now.

[unknown contact]: hey Spills! It’s Claudia - I got your number from Frankie. I was hoping you’d be able to come with me tomorrow to the bridal store. We have to make sure you match everyone on the big day!

Really fucking wish you wouldn’t call me that.

[you:] hey Claudia! Uh yeah sure what time?

[claudia😒]: great! Appointment is for 10am - I’ll send you the address, see you then! 🙂

[you]: sounds great - see you then!

Well that’s just great.

It had been a week since the beach trip and the peace couldn’t last.

—-

There was something about Claudia that got under your skin.

She’s marrying the love of your life, obviously she gets under your skin.

She was friendly enough, and she loved Francis - you could see that in her excitement; but there was something underneath. You got a sense that she was trying to pull a fast one on him.

“Spills, if Frankie and I move, would you come visit us? I think you’re holding him back a little bit.” She was standing as they made adjustments on the dress which thankfully had made it in time to be altered.

“What? What do you mean?” Where was this question coming from?

“Well, he wants to stay here. He wants to live close to his mom and you, but I’m trying to convince him to live back home with me. Maybe if you told him it would be okay and that you’d visit he’d give in.” Your blood was boiling. Give in? His wants and needs had to mean more to her than that?

I have to calm down, I’m overreacting.

“He already told you he doesn’t want to leave? Maybe you guys should compromise? Middle-ground?” You had to put your diplomatic hat on, couldn’t just tear into this girl. The logical part of your brain told you that this was normal - couples disagree about things all the time and it made sense that she’d want to be close to her family and her home.

“Yes he’s set in his ways. It’s frustrating.” She laughed lightly. “I just think that if you gave him your blessing he’d be more open to leaving with me.”

But you don’t have my blessing, I’m the wrong person to come to with this.

“I really think you should talk to him about this - he’s never been the kind of guy to be swayed. Won’t matter what I say.” You were being honest as well as telling her it wasn’t your problem in a roundabout way. She didn’t say anything else and you could tell she wasn’t happy with your answer. You left it alone.

---

You couldn’t put it off any more, as much as you were dreading this wedding you still had responsibilities as his best-person. You had to get everything together and throw this stupid fucking bachelor party.

You messaged all of the friends you knew he kept in touch with, telling them about the outing. They had things planned the whole week up until the wedding so it had to be the Friday before the wedding. Which means you had little less than a week to get it together.

[you]: Hey Francis - can you give me Popes number? Trying to plan your party!

[Francis]: Sure - sending it now. Hopefully it’s nothing too crazy?

[you]: Shit… you mean you don’t want your own parade? Should I cancel the army of exotic dancers?

[Francis]: You’re hilarious, honestly.

[you]: just taking you to a bar you fool, just want to coordinate with him because I don’t have everyone's contact info.

[Francis]: Sounds good, thanks for this - I never got a chance to ask but how did it go at the bridal store?

[you]: Went well

You thought about everything Claudia had said and debated on telling him. Would he want you to? Would she want you to? Somehow you didn’t think she’d be too happy unless you were on her side. Which you decidedly weren’t.

[you]: Think you should talk to her, she’s not happy with you wanting to stay here, after the wedding I mean. I support you whatever you decide but she seemed to think that you needed my blessing in order to leave with her. I told her she needed to talk to you - and I’m telling you the same thing.

Being honest and supportive was the best course of action and you hoped that neither of them (him more so than her) would be upset with how you went about it.

It worried you though when he didn’t answer and you had to trust that they would both understand that you didn’t actually want to influence anyones decision.

Liar, I want him to stay. Even if it’s not with me. I want him to stay.

You pushed the thought away and messaged Pope, the both of you came together and planned a dinner for everyone on the Friday before the wedding, which would turn into the bachelor party after. In five days, he’d be married and if Claudia got her way - far far away from you.

------

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[poursomesunaonme]

CONGRATULATIONS 🍾 🍾🍾🍾 i love celebrating milestones oh my god. okok. popping in for ur 50 followers event <3

1. eren *hella heart eyes 4 this boy omg*

2. yellow

3. non alc, orange juice, alc … bacardi

4. pumpkin picking + carving !! i’m really bad @ it tho LOL

5. i’m a turtle neck, jeans/sweats and giant ass coat kinda girl. and i either wear some form of boots or a ratty old pair of converse. but if i’m not looking cute it’s the first sweatshirt i find + sweats. i love love LOVE fall colors. i’m from a desert state so we don’t get fall, the leaves just turn yellow and fall to the ground, now that i’m in upstate ny for college , YOOOOOOOO. like COLORS. EVERYWHERE. has me cheesing like a little kid whenever i look outside my window. so i love leaves lol. i love the peacefulness that comes w cold weather … if that makes any sense at all. and the closer it get to christmas the more i get in the happy all the time spirit. bubble tea is the absolute love of my life.

6. sfw

(personal tidbit, i am a black woman so that’ll influence details such as hair, blushing, yadayada. thank u <3333)

elle, thank you soo much for this submission! this was really so fun to write (i was really hoping someone would send in a pumpkin carving date ugh) i do love me some softie eren hehe

word count: 2.7k

content/warnings: sfw, eren fluff, eren so soft i cant even comprehend how i wrote this, images of a penis (i dont know how to describe without spoiling LMAO)

author’s note: ahh my last submission:’) sorry to say that cuffing season is officially coming to an end, but i appreciate everyone whose submitted and interacted with my posts - y’all make me so happy!!!

cuffing season nav page

you’re greeted with the warmth of your house as you and eren stumble laughing through the door, each burdened with the weight of plump pumpkins. the two of you are all grins as your laughter peels clearly through the air. feet clamor across the floor, blindly kicking off boots as you and your man head to the kitchen to finish off your night with a bit of pumpkin carving.

“i’m gonna make…” eren trails off thoughtfully, tapping a finger to his lips. “no idea. i’m sure i’ll be inspired when i start.”

“yeah, right,” you shoot back at him, giggling at the pout that curls his bottom lip. a smile breaks through his poor excuse for a puppy face as he shrugs off your comment, moving to help you prepare for the mess that’s inevitably going to come out of this endeavor.

you gather up old newspapers and a bowl for the seeds as eren tears open the carving kits you had purchased on your way home from the pumpkin patch. as you spread the paper across the table, situating the pumpkins on top, you remember the ungodly amount of time you’d spent examining each one, making sure that the pumpkin you ended up purchasing was going to look perfect on your doorstep. eren, on the other hand, picked up the first one he saw and deemed it presentable.

before the two of you got started, you changed out of your clothes, swapping them for sweatshirts and pants that you didn’t care too much about. a happy warmth settles into your bones when eren’s hand brushes against yours on the way back to the kitchen, how your fingers intertwine automatically.

you sit down at the table, palms flat on the surface as you examine your perfectly round pumpkin. the task seems somewhat daunting now; you had spent so long looking for one that you didn’t want to mess up your one chance of creating a cute jack-o-lantern.

“so, uh, where do we start?” eren’s question tears you from your thoughts. you turn to him, seeing him resting his head on his hand, staring blankly at his pumpkin. your eyebrows furrow as the wheels turn in your head before coming to the right conclusion.

“wait, do you not know how to carve a pumpkin?”

his cheeks flame as he takes a few seconds to answer. “… no.”

“‘ren that’s just pitiful,” you laugh, scooting your chair and pumpkin closer to him to be able to show him what to do. the sentiment nearly makes your heart sink; you thought that everyone knew how to carve a pumpkin. but maybe that just wasn’t what eren’s family did when he was little. so, you relent in your teasing, not wanting to strike a nerve with him.

“whatever, teach me, o wise one.” the sarcasm in his voice elicits a surprisingly aggressive rise from you. albeit the venom is softened with the playful smile that toys with your lips.

“well if you’re gonna be sassy, maybe i won’t.” you cross your arms over your chest, trying your best to hold in a laugh as eren’s eyes widen into saucers. he turns to you, grabbing one of your hands and kissing it profusely.

“please, love.” his begging elicits a wide smile from your face, but you play off your relent with a dramatic eye roll.

“okay, but only because you’re being sweet now.”

“now?” eren releases your hand and crosses his arms instead. his theatrics are unparalleled by anyone you’d ever met. “i’m always sweet to you.”

you easily pursue the playful banter. “okay, you’re just pushing it now.”

he’s back on his proverbial hands in knees as he grasps both of your hands, leaning down to press his forehead against them. “i’m sorry, i’m sorry. please teach me, y/n.”

your laughter echoes throughout the kitchen as you twist your hands to cup his face and press a sweet kiss to his lips. “i was going to, i just wanted to see if you would grovel for it.”

eren bites his tongue, not wanting to press his luck. you gather the supplies and begin to instruct him in the mystic ways of pumpkin carving.

“okay, so first you carve off the top so that you can scoop out the seeds,” you begin, reaching to steady one hand on the top before plunging the knife into the solid skin. suddenly, an idea pops into your head. “ooh, we should make pumpkin seeds!”

you’re mouth is practically watering at the thought of the spice dissolving onto your tongue. eren perks up at the mention of snacks. “that sounds really good, actually.”

you clap your hands together enthusiastically. “okay then we’re doing it. anyways…”

you demonstrate how to jab the knife into the top and carve out a circle to make an easy handle, watching as eren struggles to control how his pumpkin shakes. the jagged lines that he creates won’t be easy to maneuver, so you have to fix it for him. when the caps are completed, you use the seed scoops included in the kit to remove the seeds from inside. you allow eren to roll up your sleeves before he does his own, and you both get to work.

a grimace contorts your features as the sticky, slimy ropes of seeds cling to your skin as you shovel them out in clumps. but, the work is quickly finished, and your pumpkins are ready for their makeover. he threatens to smear the seeds’ residue on you, so naturally you point a knife at him. needless to say, he relents.

“okay, they have a few templates that we can use.” you show him some of the traceable papers that were included in the box. he flits through them absentmindedly while you stare at the frankenstein’s monster that you ambitiously chose for your pumpkin. after a few moments, eren hands the papers back to you.

“i’m gonna go freestyle,” he announces, which you laugh at.

“you’ve never carved a pumpkin and you’re gonna go freestyle?”

“yes.” he’s dead set on making the worst pumpkin ever. you don’t pry into what his idea in, but needless to say, you’re scared at what his silly little mind had come up with.

“have at it, i guess,” you sigh, sticking the paper to your own pumpkin, trying to visualize where it would look best. once you sink your knife into the firm orange sink, the paper immediately tears. you swear, trying to piece it back together. the paper manages to stick together, but the image is severely warped; you know that your pumpkin is gonna suck.

“how’s it going over there?” eren teases, sneaking a glance at your failure. you swat him away, giggling at his nosiness. he hasn’t even begun to carve his pumpkin.

“oh, shut up, mr. freestyle,” you murmur, trying to fix your mistakes. as you continue poking the holes for tracing into the pumpkin, it continues to fall apart under your fingers. you eventually give up, trying to poke the holes yourself. as you inconspicuously flit your eyes to eren, you find that he’s already gotten to work on his carving. his eyebrows furrow together while his tongue sticks out in concentration.

the sight of him makes your heart melt as you turn your concentration back to your carving. the lack of confidence in your tracing seizes you as you attempt to begin to connect the dots, swearing as your flimsy knife breaks.

“ah, the passion of a young artist,” eren comments wittily as you roll your eyes as him, reaching for a spare knife. as soon as you resume your work, a crack resounds from eren’s vicinity. you adjust your gaze to see his cheeks flaming, looking at his now broken knife. neither of you say anything as he also reaches for a spare. your heart flutters at the way his hand cups the round fruit, his gaze intent on his labor.

at the end of your carving, after picking out the chunks of orange flesh that fall from the pumpkin, you find that you didn’t trace out the patterns correctly. the dimensions are all wrong, and half of the monster’s face had caved into the empty center. the physics of pumpkin carving were absolutely lost on you, not knowing how to carve correctly the right spaces that would create a gap for the light to shine through. you sigh and lean back, disappointed at how it came out, but it’s incredibly amusing to you.

“hey, look ‘ren,” you grab his attention, turning the pumpkin to show him. “i made you.”

his face contorts into a grimace at your sloppy work, but a guffaw escapes his lips as he leans in for a closer look. his hand immediately finds purchase on your leg, squeezing your thigh affectionately.

“babe, you got my face all wrong,” he gestures to the lopsided feature. you laugh, swatting away his hand as you stand to clean off the pumpkin seeds.

“wrong? hm, i don’t think so.” your fingers trace along his jawline as you saunter over to behold his pumpkin. “eren!”

he had carved a penis into his pumpkin. you choose to ignore his schoolboyish grin and go to make the pumpkin seeds.

you grab the bowl and immediately make a beeline for the kitchen sink. eren lets out a hearty laugh and follows you, finished with his carving. you call out the supplies you need as you wash the seeds clean of their sticky casing. the ropes easily wash off in the sink, flowing down the drain in response to you nimbly working your fingers over them.

eren’s arms wrap around your frame, pulling you closer to him as he buries his face in your hair. your heart skips a beat at his affection, but you continue to wash the seeds until they’re clean. the man that clings to you smells like fresh pumpkin, like fall, as he relishes in the warmth of your body.

“clingy today, aren’t we?” you tease him, moving to grab paper towels. he merely grunts, still holding onto you. you roll your eyes affectionately, even though he doesn’t see. at your departure from the kitchen sink, he lets go of you, but still follows you like a lost puppy.

you continue to teach him the ways of pumpkin use while dabbing the wetness off the seeds before tearing off a sheet of parchment paper to lay on the baking sheet. the tumble of the seeds is like music to your ears as you make sure they’re spread equally across the surface.

eren helps you out by sprinkling olive oil onto the seeds, marveling at how they glisten under the lights of the kitchen. deftly, you sprinkle salt, pepper, and other spicy seasoning while he watches you in wonder, pondering how he got so lucky with you.

and soon, the preparation of the seeds is finished as you pop the tray in the oven. you dust off your hands, leaning against the countertop as eren moves to corner you. his hands gently cup your face as he moves in to kiss you, the sweet smoothness of his lips slotting perfectly against yours.

you relish in the contact, hands traveling up his body to fiddle with his hair as the innocent kisses continue. he had been especially sweet to you today, knowing that the first beautiful fall day was his opportunity to shower you with an immeasurable amount of love. he had taken the long way to the pumpkin patch, letting you marvel at the scenery on the way there.

the onset of the changing of the seasons was apparent as the roads furled and unwound underneath his tires. the chill was something that you loved, as it gave you the opportunity to bundle underneath warm clothes (and your man). the leaves changing was enough to make you want to live a hermit life in the woods. the vibrant colors that exploded when autumn made her home in mother nature always amazed you. everywhere you looked, there were new colors to see, new palettes on every tree that you laid eyes on.

eren pulls back, his face somewhat serious. “hey, we need to go set out our pumpkins!” he reminds you.

“i don’t know if our neighbors are going to like a penis on our doorstep,” you tease, but follow him anyway.

“if they don’t like it, they can fix it themselves,” he annunciates dramatically, helping you gather supplies. you set a timer for the seeds on your phone while you get candles, a lighter, your sad excuses for jack-o-lanterns, and head outside. you’re greeted with the nippy autumn air enveloping your body, but with eren at your side, he provides more than enough warmth.

sitting on the stoop of the stairs, the two of you set up your pumpkins, lighting the candles and setting the tops back on. holding your hand, he leads you a few steps away to marvel at how the light flickers from within the orange fruit.

“let’s take some pictures!” eren suggests, unlocking his phone and propping it against a stone. the two of you take sweet self timers, serious, silly, and criminally cute ones too - the one where he literally whisks you off your feet to dip you in his arms, pressing a kiss to your lips is going to be printed and hanging in your house for the rest of your natural life.

your phone chimes at the end of the photography session, signaling the end of the seeds cooking. the two of you seek shelter from the bone-chilling cold inside, going to examine the seeds. the smell of the spices melding together floods into your nostrils as soon as you enter the house, causing your mouth to water. eren’s excitement can only be described as infantile as he runs ahead of you to retrieve the seeds.

they sizzle as he brings them out of the oven, marveling at how delectible they look, all browned and covered in delicious seasoning. the musky scent of the spices reaches your nose, eliciting an obnoxious amount of drool pooling on your mouth; you just want to sink your teeth right into them; but, you know restraint, unlike eren. you swat his hand away as he goes to grab one.

“do you wanna have your tongue burned off?” you tease, pushing his arm to set the tray down. he follows your lead, the sheet clattering loudly on the countertop.

“i guess not,” he sighs dramatically, arm wrapping around you once again. together, the two of you make your way to the couch to turn on a movie, getting only a few minutes in before eren is begging for the pumpkin seeds to snack on. you roll your eyes as he goes to get them, pouring them in a large bowl before returning to you.

as soon as he pops on into his mouth, he’s practically raving at how much of a goddess you are, at your perfection that he can’t even begin to comprehend. your heart swells at his affection, how his gorgeous green eyes glow with a love that you could never begin to comprehend.

“… and you suck at pumpkin carving, but pumpkin seeds,” he finishes with a dramatic imitation of a chef’s kiss, feeding you a bite. “that’s a different story. you’re amazing.”

you rest your head against his shoulder as the spice bursts across your tongue, absentmindedly tuning into the movie before eren’s fingers enclose around your jaw to turn your head to face him.

“i had the most wonderful day today, baby,” he murmurs. “thank you for everything. you’re just so amazing, i… i love you so much.”

a heat rises to your cheeks as you kiss him wordlessly, threatening to knock over the bowl of seeds at your passion. his arms wrap around you as the two of you forget about the snacks, forget about the movie, forget about the botched monster and penis pumpkin that sit on your doorstep; all you can think about is each other and how your hearts explode with an overpowering love when you tumble into his arms.

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