#we need ur money haha

[holiestartthou]

Having a disability but not being able to get proper aid for it is the literal fucking worst. “You have X disability” my doctors tells me, but i am not disabled enough to require help bcoz obviously I am able enough to keep a job haha :)

A job that is wearing me down physically that I can’t keep up with but can’t afford to loose due to the current economy :)

A job that leaves me bed ridden on my days off and barely able to feed myself when I get home bcoz of how much fucking pain I’m in :)

A job that is making it extremely hard for me to do any of my hobbies bcoz of the physical and mental fatigue, which in turn makes my clinical depression worse :) b

A job that would do wonders for me to quit but is unfortunately the only high paying position around me and again: bills too high :)

[iamnmbr3]

wow. the leaks about the She Hulk finale were true. I can’t believe it. It sounded so dumb I thought even Disney couldn’t fail that hard. Looks like once again my standards were too high. bet they did this so then they can have their stans be like 'oh you thought the VFX sucked? no it was on purpose! that was the joke. u just don't know how to have fun. all the bad writing and bad VFX were on purpose'

which is ridiculous. 1) even if u intentionally bake a cake with sewage it still isn't a good cake 2) obviously this is ppl who suck trying to play off their suckiness as intentional bc they are incapable of producing anything of quality and don’t care to even try and still expect people to give them money 3) if ur baking a cake with sewage on purpose don't advertise it as regular cake bc ppl are gonna be disappointed 4) good cake is still better than a cake made with sewage and if u made ur cake with sewage it is bad and u should feel bad

[racew1nn3rs]

─ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦 𝘪. (𝘪'𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘸𝘯𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦) 🧶

⤷ summary: the world meets the newest mclaren team member, and they are loving it! it's poor oscars first day and shit's already hitting the fan sorry dude ): LMAO. lando just experienced love at first sight, while y/n is ready to fist fight

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liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 32,890 others

mclaren oscar's first day of kindergarten, done. pre-season testing, done. (we'll be even faster soon 🙏🏼 don't worry guys)

2,568 comments

user2 HELLO??? WHO HACKED THE MCLAREN ACCOUNT

user6 we'll be racing past redbull in no time

mclaren a girl can dream

user7 lando is this you??? 😭

user8 budget dropped so low they had to hire the drivers for social media

user3 this is haas money behavior

mclaren excuse you i am NOT LANDO

user8 oscar????

mclaren no sir, i'm the owner of this house 🫵

user9 idk if this is a new admin but this is so unserious

mclaren new year new me babe

user9 give her a raise mclaren 🙏🏼

mclaren REPOST REPOST REPOST

landonorris first day on the job and already asking for more money?

mclaren i'm so sorry lord lando, you forget that us lowly peasants aren't on an athelete salary 🙄

user10 HUMBLE HIM, WE LOVE TO SEE IT

user11 mclaren admin beefing with lando was NOT on my 2023 bingo card

user12 she really said, "ik we're slow but LET US COOK"

mclaren TRUUUSTTT THAT COMEBACK IS COMING (im manifesting)

oscarpiastri KINDERGARTEN??? i'm nearly 22 mate

mclaren teensy weensy baby basically

oscarpiastri your fired /:

mclaren HAHA YOU CAN'T DO THAT 🏃🏻‍♀️

user13 petition for all the f1 team accounts to be run by young admins, this is tooooo good

mclaren screenshotting this for my boss so they don't see these comments and fire me

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user14 she. looked. up. his. salary. 💀 ICON

user15 hiring her was such a rare mclaren W

user16 MCLAREN ADMIN HEAR OUR PRAYERS AND MAKE TIKTOKS 🙏🏼

user17 OMG CAN U IMAGINE

user18 HOW MUCH MONEY DO I HAVE TO PAY MS. MCLAREN FOR THIS OMG

user19 will our team win? probably not BUT AT LEAST WE'LL BE GETTING CONTENT 😘

user20 AYYYYEEEE

user21 LANDO MAY NEVER WIN, BUT THE FANS NEVER LOSE 🤞🏾

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liked by mclaren, maxfewtrell, and 60,050 others

landonorris don't mind me, just living my lord life on my athlete's salary. bahrain here we come!

10,750 comments

user22 WHERES THE MCLAREN ADMIN

user23 lando nowins flexing on us poor people

user24 someone come get this man's phone

user25 oh i KNOW pr is mad 💀💀💀

user26 daniel ricciardo leaves and mclaren loses it's mind

user27 daniel leaves and all of us lose our minds 🥲

oscarpiastri jesus christ mate, log out

mclaren i'm not sure he knows how, he might need to pay someone to /:

user28 CRAZZZYYYY

user29 THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING

user30 "f1 is a serious sport." the serious sport in question:

user31 the papaya hat 🫵

user32 HE'S SO FINE IM GNAWING AT THE BARS

user33 BARK BARK WOOF WOOF

mclaren phones. on the table. NEOWWW

user33 holy shit this is actually so embarrassing

mclaren at least ur self aware!

user34 she clocked ur asses 😭😭😭

maxfewtrell lord lando flying economy

landonorris I AM NOT

user35 bro took that personally

user36 me thinks the man doth protest too much

danielricciardo i leave you alone for a few months and this is what you're doing

landonorris i learned from the best

danielricciardo DONT BLAME ME FOR THIS

maxverstappen1 ... that's my plane???

landonorris SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

maxverstappen1 you can't just take credit for my private jet. its mine.

mclaren this just in, little lando norris is a little LIAR

mclaren when he steals a plane and wears bucket hats 🫵🤣 everyone point and laugh

landonorris I QUITE LIKE BUCKET HATS

mclaren i quite like bucket hats 🇬🇧☕️🤓

maxverstappen1 🫵🤣

danielricciardo 🫵🤣

charles_leclerc 🫵🤣

carlossainz55 🫵🤣

maxfewtrell 🫵🤣

oscarpiastri 🫵🤣

landonorris OSCAR????

oscarpiastri 🫵🤣 🫵🤣 🫵🤣

mclaren damn he got you there

user37 this cannot be real

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There were quite a few things Lando expected to be on his agenda when he arrived in Bahrain after him and Max went seperate ways to their own teams. He figured he would meet with his engineers, spend some time getting adjusted to working with Oscar (especially given he hadn't had very much time to meet or bond with the rookie over the break or during pre-season testing), and doing some press interviews as per usual. However no where on his list was an impromptu meeting with Zak Brown. Oscar seemed clueless as to what was going on as well, and Lydia, Lando's personal assistant of two years, was just as clueless.

Lando and Oscar filed into the board room, bottles of water in hand, only to be met face to face with their team manager. Nothing seemed suspicious which Lando hoped was a good thing, but after their underwhelming performance in pre-season testing he knew anything was a possibility.

"Have a seat guys, it's good to see you both. I hope you've been well-rested since testing," Zak greeted with his usual cheerful attitude. Lando and Oscar looked at each other warily but nodded at their boss nonetheless. Zak was usually more of a 'get to the point' kind of man, so this change of pace was unnerving to say the least. Normally it scared Lando a little bit, but truthfully, right now, Lando wanted to be done with this meeting and to get to race preparations.

"That's good, you need all the rest you can get if we're going to try and put up a fight this weekend. In all honesty, I think within the next two years we have a chance to become real competition here. I think we can give Red Bull and Ferrari a run for their money and earn plenty of points this year. Hell," the older man chuckled, "maybe we can win it all."

Lando didn't want to seem skeptical, but he was definitely skeptical. He did not think the car he was given in testing could win the championship, but he would sure as hell be trying.

"But no matter how hard the engineers work the car, and no matter how many sims we do, the one thing we're lacking in is presence. McLaren is notable, we have a famous team and a long roster of famous, successful drivers, including the two of you, but we don't have the same dominating media presence that Mercedes or Ferrari do. And that's what gets us sponsors, and celebrity visits, and fans, and funding. We may not be struggling for money, but if you guys like your multi-million dollar salaries and you want your car to keep being better, we need more media presence. Which is why we decided we wanted to go a bit of a different route this year, with media and all of that."

Oh god. Lando knew where this was going. This was about the new social media admin that had been ruthlessly harrasing him- albeit teasingly- for days now. Only employed for less than two weeks and already stirring up the pot across platforms. Lando looked at Oscar, noting that his teammate was clearly following as well now.

"I know you both have come to realize this already, but there is a new social media manager who runs all of the McLaren accounts. We wanted someone young, someone trendy, someone who knew what the internet is looking for, and who can help us connect and start getting more eyes on McLaren. We want her to meet with you guys today to share a couple of ideas so you can be on the same page for what we'll be doing online. The new manager is just outside. Let me get her so you can speak with her."

Lando nodded dumbly. Right, ok, he could do that. Lando was young, he was online, he was trendy. Plus, most of if not all of the F1 drivers had some kind of media presence already. Lando streamed, he had instagram accounts and twitter, and he even had Quadrant. Lando steeled himself. This would be just fine. An adjustment, but fine.

Zak greeted someone outside of the door and a small bit of shuffling sounds were heard. Before Lando had a chance to stand, Zak was turning and nodding a quick goodbye. Leaving the office room, as a smaller body replaced the space he had been in.

Lando felt like the air had been knocked from his lungs and hoped he hadn't made a noise out loud. He stared, he couldn't help it. He was sure he was slack-jawed, mouth agape and flies coming in. Somewhere in the back of his mind he registered that he should be professional and behave like a normal human being. But the other part of his brain, the dominant part of his brain, was in awe.

Lando looked at the girl in front of him up and down, probably far too obviously, and was stunned. He saw jean shorts, a faded and a mid-washed denim. A colorful-tighter cropped shirt and some layered gold jewelery. Rings on her fingers. Sunglasses in her hair, making her look way to cool to ever speak to him. She rocked on the balls of her sneaker-clad feet- sneakers that matched her clothes perfectly much to Lando's delight- and quickly moved to set her laptop down of the table. She left her small colorful handbag on the table alongside a cup of iced coffee that was already melting in the Bahrain heat. She looked as if she had jumped straight from a Vogue cover (or one of his favorite dreams) and landed right in front of him.

Was it the heat that was making it so hot? Because Lando was becoming suddenly aware of the heat beneath his shirt collar. A stifled cough from Oscar drew Lando from his observation- or rather his creepy, stalker staring- and Lando realized this was not the social etiquette that the situation called for.

Before Lando could even take a step, the girl smirked.

"Nice to finally meet you guys. Hello Oscar," the girl leaned over and shook the taller man's hand. "And Lord Lando, is it? It's nice to finally meet you. I'm Y/N L/N, i'm the new social media manager for the season."

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Y/N could now officially say she is not a fan of Lando Norris. The online feud she had cleverly created to generate some conversation about McLaren before the season started had been banter. She had taken no offense to Lando's jokes at all, but now that she was in front of the man and could feel his judgement, her opionions had changed.

From the second she walked in Lando had begun unabashedly staring at her. Looking her up and down, from the shoes she had recently bought to the hair clipped back on her head, and was not sparing a single detail. She felt vaguely like a mannequin on display and it unnerved her.

Oscar smiled at her politely as she set her things down, and she felt thankful for the reprieve from the judgement and critcism she had been recieving since she arrived and was now experiencing again from Lando in full force.

Y/N was aware that her outfit wasn't uniform or professional, but those were not the qualities she was hired for. Y/N had been confident coming in here, feeling like she would likely connect better with people her own age, but was thoroughly dissapointed to find this was not the case.

Oscar ultimately cleared his throat awkwardly, and it appeared as though this finally snapped Lando out of his judgemental stupor, so Y/N decided to finally make her introductions.

"Nice to finally meet you guys, hello Oscar," she leaned over and shook the taller man's hand. "And Lord Lando, is it? It's nice to finally meet you. I'm Y/N L/N, i'm the new social media manager for the season."

Lando groaned loudly and Oscar laughed.

"Lando I don't think you'll ever live this one down," and Y/N forced a laugh and nodded in agreeance.

"No, probably not. But that's good, that's what I was hoping for." Y/N stated bluntly.

"You were hoping to torture me?" Lando stuttered out and Y/N rolled her eyes, "You'll live I promise." Oscar laughed before pointing out, "at least your not a kindergartener."

Lando stifled a laugh but agreed.

"What purpose did Oscar's baby jokes serve?" Lando asked, and Y/N forced herself not to punch the man at his judgemental tone. He clearly didn't believe in her ability to do her job.

"It's funny, that was it's purpose," she stated, gesturing to the table for the boys to sit as she opened up her laptop. She turned to face toward them, lifting herself slightly so was seated criss-crossed in the chair. She never had liked sitting normally. The boys across from her stared at her expectantly.

"So you create jokes the make people look at us more?" Oscar asked.

"In a way yes. My job is to manage the accounts, but I've also been hired to help get you guys more fans. Fans love to be interacted with, they love seeing you guys joke around, they like feeling like they have content to consume," Y/N explained.

"By playing into these desires, you get more fans, because they feel they 'know you" in a way they don't know the other drivers." The boys nodded their head in understanding.

"So the plan is for me to keep interacting with fans through the McLaren accounts, playing up jokes with you too, and for us to give the fans new content in a way they don't usually get it. Livestreams, youtube vlogs, inside internet jokes, TikToks, the works." Y/N stated.

"Essentially," she said dragging the word out, "I'm going to make you guys the internet's little papaya stars," Lando laughed but nodded. Y/N, despite her first impressions and her developing dislike for the driver, found herself smiling. She could see the vision. Both Oscar and Lando would be awkward and loveable and humorous. The perfect mix for internet support.

"So where do we start?" Oscar asked.

"I'm glad you asked," Y/N smirked. "Have you heard the clip of 'Cuffing Season' by SZA? There's a TikTok trend I think will be perfect for you to do."

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user38 can we talk about how gorgeous admin is?!?!? LIKE OH MY GOD

user10 only hot people go to mclaren

user40 that check better be huge for her

user41 oscar was so mf stiff 💀💀 free my boy

user42 who had a gun to oscars head, he was so scared

user43 lando thirst trapping ICB 😭 I NEED A BIG BOYYY

user44 god admin is so sexy and smart, that was art

user45 CAN WE DISCUSS HOW LANDO LOOKS AT HER

user46 ikr 💀 get off the floor lando your drooling

user47 i want a man to be that down bad for me

user48 lando loverboy era unlocked

user49 meanwhile admin didn't look him in the face

user50 f1 2023 is going to be a WILD RIDE for us mclaren fans if this is before the first race even starts

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hope you all enjoyed! please let me know your thoughts and feel free to leave a request for me to write something for your fav <3

-

𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

@lemon-lav @slutforpopculture @m4rt10ne

[brossession-collection]

Becoming His Type (Male Possession)

"Ur a nice guy man! Seriously. But ur just not my type. Like 'em beefier haha. Happy to train ya still if you're okay with that."

Jason read the text over and over. "What a fucking douche" he thought, teeth clenched, as he gripped his phone.

Two weeks ago Jason had built up the courage to talk to his beefy gym crush, Carson. Jason wasn't the biggest dude. His 5'8 frame and 155lb stature wasn't anything to brag about, but he had gotten to a lean athletic build that he worked on for months. He thought, atleast, Carson would hold a conversation with him now that he was kinda lean.

And he did. Carson nodded at Jason as he walked up, Jason quivering as he asked the big guy if he had any diet tips.

The two hit it off, or at least that's what Jason thought. "Hey I gotta get back to my set bro, but what say we keep chatting later? You free tomorrow morning?" Carson's deep voice put Jason into a horny stupor. He repeated his question which brought Jason back to earth.

Later that night...

Jason sat up in bed, rubbing his b*ner, as he thought about Carson's thick biceps and pillowy pecs. "I can't believe he fucking TALKED to me!" Jason squealed as he tweaked his nipples, imagining Carson wrap his arms around him, the smell of his musky armpits wafting into his nose. He barely remembered anything that the big jock actually said, but he couldn't care less. Jason drifted off as his fantasy turned into a dream.

The next morning at the gym...

"And that's all there is to it bro. Track the macros, eat a ton of protein, and don't stop bulking for a year. Then you'll get a belly like mine heh." Carson gave his protruding stomach a slap as Jason winced while he watched the strong mass jiggle.

"W-wow uh yeah I'd love that..." Jason managed to get whimper out. "I-I mean... yeah! I'll definitely do that! M-m-maybe you could also show me some exercise tips?"

"Hah sure little guy we can have a first sesh. On the house." Carson got off the bench he was sitting on and nudged (pushed) Jason down. "Let's see what you got baby. Bench presses first.

Jason then worked his ass off the entire morning to try to impress his crush. Every once in a while, he'd notice Carson looking off across distance, obviously eyeing a big bear slightly older than him. Carson would eventually get back to Jason, but the lean man knew something was up

Later that night...

"What the hell should I text him? 'Thanks for hanging with me earlier big guy wanna date?' 'You're super cute wanna cuddle?'" Jason lied in bed anxiety-ridden.

He saw a text come in instead.

Carson: "Sup Jason how ya doing?"

Carson: "Muscles aching yet? Srry if it was too much for ya."

Jason flinched for a second before typing back. "Oh sup Carson. Yeahhhh haha kinda hurts."

He waited for a second before sending another text.

Jason: "oh and thanks for the session today dude I appreciate it"

Carson: "yea bro anytime. Need more good looking guys like you getting big"

Jason blushed as his boner came in. "Should I just ask him out?" he thought. "Fuck it."

Jason: "Yeah! I'd love to keep doing this with you man. You're super hot. Honestly could be fun to date if you're down."

Jason put down his phone in fear. He felt a vibrate and slowly picked it up.

Carson: "Bro what lol"

Carson: "Shit sorry man didn't realize you felt like that."

Jason gripped his phone as he watched Carson type.

Carson: "Ur a nice guy man! Seriously. But ur just not my type. Like 'em beefier haha. Happy to train ya still if you're okay with that."

Jason felt his teeth clench. He stopped texting and threw it onto his night stand. "What a fucking douche," he thought. "Dude just saw me as another client. As a walking fucking money bag." Jason felt tears start to streak down his face.

The next morning at the gym...

Jason watched from a distance near the locker rooms as he saw Carson laughing with the muscular daddy bear he was eyeing yesterday. "He already fucking forgot about me" Jason muttered under his breath.

He squinted as he watched the two big men take their phones, possibly to exchange numbers. With a grin, Carson gives the man a hug before the two walk off in opposite directions.

"Oh shit he's coming this way!" Jason started to whistle as he the big bearded daddy strut past him to go into the locker room. Jason shuddered as he noticed the pure gargantuan size of the man. "Fuck... He's huge."

For some reason, Jason felt compelled to follow the bear. He hopped into the locker room and watched as the man posed in front of the mirror and took a selfie.

"He's probably sending that to Carson..." Jason thought.

Suddenly, the big guy turns around and sees Jason stalking him.

"What the fuck do you want twink? Been seeing you follow me around all morning."

Jason flinched from how direct the huge man was. "U-uh fuck I'm sorry man!" Jason wished his voice was more threatening.

"Answer the question: what the fuck do you want?" The bear came closer, ready to shove Jason. "Get the fuck outta my way!"

Jason felt his frail body smash into the wall, his back taking the full brace of the impact as his vision started to blur. He saw the big feet of the man step next to him before he blacked out.

...

...

In a snap, Jason felt his torso lurch up as he came back into consciousness. But something felt off. Jason looked down.

"WHAT THE FUCK!? Wh-why are my hands... BLUE?" Jason looked at his palms incredulously before glancing further down at his physical body slumped beneathe him. His blue ghostly form sticking out from the pelvis-up.

In the corner of his eye, Jason saw the big bear standing around. "Fuck. Didn't realize he'd go flying." He heard the man say.

Jason got up with virtually no pain, seeing his ghostly ectoplasm oozing off his limbs as he leaves his physical form. He looked up at the big man, anger seething through his ephemeral form.

"Oh you're gonna fucking pay for that man! I don't care how big you are!" Jason yelled. The big man, completely unaware of Jason, just picked at his nose before kneeling down to check on his victim's pulse.

"Kid's still got a heart beat. He'll be fine." For a split second Jason felt some compassion come from the bear, which all shattered as he saw him spit at his corpse. "Fucking stalker. Better not be here when by the time I'm done showering."

Jason pounced at the man, attempting to claw at his big shoulders. The bear fell forward onto all fours before looking around in a panic. "What the fuck was that!?" he yelled into the empty locker room.

Looking down at the beefy bear with his ass up in the air, Jason had an idea. "If I'm a ghost, maybe I can..." Jason connected the dots in his head before acting out his plan.

The big man started to get up before he felt his body get pinned down by something that felt like a foot. "OooFFF" he groaned as the air left his lungs.

Jason had to work fast. He reached down and carefully attempted to grab the man's waistband. He felt a tactile sensation and grinned before pulling it down to expose the man's bulbous cheeks.

"AAHHH wh-what's going ON!?" the bear whimpered as he felt a cool air skim his cheeks.

Jason eyed as the sweaty, hairy, musky mounds jiggled before slowing to a stop. He'd never been this close to such a big *ss before, and it was causing Jason to get a huge ghost b*ner.

The bear started to panic as he felt a slimy, cold finger run down his tight crack. "A-ah f-fuck!" he moaned as the finger playfully pushed in and out.

Jason grabbed both of the bear's *ss cheeks and ripped them apart, exposing his surprisingly loose *sshole. He glanced down at the pulsating hole, questioning for a second if he was really going through with this.

"Hope that Casper movie wasn't bullshit! Coming through!!"

The bear winced as he felt something larger than a d*ck shove itself into his *sshole. "Ho-Holy SHITTT!!!!"

Jason gripped onto the bear's cheeks as he used them to push into the man's tight hole. Suddenly there was a "POP" and he realized he was in. "Fuck yes! Here I come big guy!!!" Jason yelled happily.

The bear looked around in a panic as he heard a familiar voice echo in his mind. His mind quickly turned to his physical sensations, though, as he felt slimey shoulder squeeze in. "OOOOF!" he groaned.

With a giddy smile on his face, Jason tunneled through the dark expanses of the bear's body. His arms and tight lean waist slipped in as the bear groaned uncontrollably.

The big guy mustered all his strength to turn his head, only to see blue lean legs and feet protruding out of his asshole, inching their way deeper and deeper in. "F-f-fucking HELL!" was all he could yell as the crammed sensations worked their way up his torso.

Jason, torso-up inhabiting the bear's body, reached down to pull his small dick through the asshole. Suddenly, he felt the rest of his legs slurp themselves in too.

The bear felt himself getting filled up to the brim as another being literally shoved himself into all the crevices of his fat body. His yells reaching it's loudest as he felt the blue ectoplasmic feet slide in with a "PLOP!"

The bear reached back and pawed at his loose asshole, scooping up the ectoplasm that was left behind. He tried to get up but lost his balance as he felt the ghost inside of him lurch forward.

"Here comes the fun part fatty!" Jason yelled with a mocking chatter. Jason wasted no time shoving his limbs into the man, pressing his arms and legs into his vessel's like gloves and boots.

The beefy bear, finally having gotten up, felt his body start to dance around beyond his will. His right arm flailed as his left hand tried to stop it before betraying him and slapping him on the face. "Fu-fuck! GET THE FUCK OUT OF ME" he yelled at his belly wiggled uncontrollably.

Jason shoved his hard c*ck into the bear's girthy one, filling it up like a sheathe. His lined up his ghostly balls with his host's tennis-ball sized one, feeling them expand with a "POP" "POP".

The bear, pounding at his belly to get the invader out, suddenly lost control of his arms and hands as they reached down to stroke his huge 8in d*ck and finger his fat ass. He heard a laugh followed by a "BOOM" as his butt and legs filled up with ectoplasm.

With the bear's hands and feet under his control Jason realized there was only one step left.

"Puh-puh-please m-man! G-get out of- *gurgle*" The bear's neck started to bulge as Jason hurriedly squeezed into his host's head. The bear gasped for air as he gagged on ectoplasm, the pressure in his brain close to popping before-.

...

Jason opened his eyes and took a deep breath, his belly filling up and stretching out the tank top he was now wearing. "Oooh fuck yeah" he cooed, using the bear's sexy voice for the first time. He looked down and immediately reached for his beefy pecs, massaging his new nipples with his host's stubby fingers. They were sensitive, hard-wired to his new girthy c*ck as he felt his sweaty jock stretching to the limit. He pulled his waistband back up and felt the airy fabric wrap around his fat ass, immediately nesting between his cheeks.

"Can't believe it fucking WORKED. Hell YEAH BABY! I'M A FUCKING BEAR!" Jason danced around a bit, waving his new jiggly belly around in the air before he heard the door to the locker room open.

Jason watched as one of the bodybuilders stumbled in, so distressed from the workout that he didn't even notice Jason's lean body slumped against the wall. He tiredly glanced at Jason, who was at eye-level with him, and muttered a "How's it going Roy" before walking deeper into the locker room.

Jason's heart skipped a beat, but then calmed down as he realized that no one can tell. He walked up to the mirror and grinned at his reflection as he crossed his arms. He was fucking HUGE.

Jason felt sweat drip down from his forehead, chest, and pits. He carefully lifted his new beefy arms and immediately got hit by a wave of ripe musk. "Fuuuuuck. I smell so... GOOD" he moaned, using Roy's vocal chords. "Not gonna wash these pits" he chuckled.

In the corner of his eye, Jason glanced at his old slumped body. "Damn. I'm so fucking tiny... No wonder I flew into the wall" he reflected. Jason daydreamed for a second, then realized he could live out a huge k*nky fantasy of his. He picked up his old body with ease and took him to a secluded part of the locker room.

Jason started to eagerly rip off his old body's clothes, pulling down his pants and revealing his musky thin yellow briefs. He slipped them off and took the briefs up to his nose, taking a deep inhale of his old musk.

With a smirk, Jason dropped his host's Size XXL gym shorts and jockstrap, revealing his girthy hairy cock. He then started to slip on the Size S yellow briefs up his thick tree trunk legs, making sure the fabric didn't rip. Jason grinned as he felt the tiny briefs get eaten by his new gigantic asscheeks. He grabbed both of his cheeks with his meaty paws and ripped them open, making sure the fabric would touch his new musky *sshole like a thong.

"Ohhhh fuuuck yeah!" he groaned, as he sealed the entrance that he came in from. His d*ck was leaking profusely, more so than his old one did.

Jason pulled his host's shorts up. He grinned at the fat *ss in the mirror before he felt his new phone vibrate. "That who I think it is?"

He unlocked his phone and saw "Carson" had texted him.

Carson: "Hey handsome. What are you up to tonight?"

Jason couldn't help but chuckle, his big belly jiggling with every heave. He pawed at the keyboard with a huge grin.

Roy: "Hey baby. Nothing much. You wanna get k*nky tonight?"

Jason shoved Roy's phone into his pocket before running out of the locker room in a hurry, his big a*s jiggling with every step. His phone vibrated a ton, but Jason knew he needed to do something before he replied.

Later that night...

Jason stripped naked and laid in bed. He opened up his camera and saw the handsome grizzly face of the man he possessed. "Don't know how much time I have in you man but I'm gonna take advantage of it. Gonna get you real k*nky. Make you say shit you'd never say. And I bet Carson would do anything to fuck your musky fat*ss." Jason reached down to finger Roy's *sshole before giving his finger a lick.

"Haha. Alright alright enough fun. Got a video to send to a lucky guy."

Jason started to record.

FIN

[pumpkinsy0]

I like the idea of Ponyboy being a sneaky little shit and getting Curly a book on horticulture ("Haha, you said whore." -Curly) and Curly being all "why the fuck do I want this?"

Ponyboy says nothing, just smiling as he turns the pages to show one how to grow marijuana and Curly's all "Babe, I'll fucking marry you."

Trial and error, good days, bad ones. It's all worth is cause in eight weeks time Curly has his first sprouts. They are wrapped in a baby blanket under a heat lamp in the shed. The sprouts grow and soon enough he's ready for business. He dubs himself "The Greaser Gardner" cause it's kinda true, but also tuff when he puts it into perspective (it's not cool. Angela told him he sounded like a hick grandpa)

Speaking of names, he names his plants too. "This one is prickles, this one is stabby, that one back there is pluck and this one. . . . . this is Ponybabe. I named it after my wife."

Curly makes 50 bucks a month selling the stuff.

Tim is baffled. Perplexed. Because when the hell did Curly prove he could a.) read, b.) comprehend what he was reading and c.) put what he read and comprehend into action all at once?

i giggled at horticulture too, i am NO better than curly

im ngl i IMMEDIATELY thought of that yrailer park boys episode where ricky and julian were growing weed in that one empty ass trailer, I FORGOT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED BUT IT WAS THAT EPISODE WHERE THE STRIPPER FUCKING STOLE EVERYTHING😭😭

curly going from “babe ill fucking marry u” to “i named it after my wife” what plot development THIS is what we need to see more of ☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽

he only sells stuff from the ponybabe™️ plant to special customers so i like to image he gets really really dramatic talking about that plant, pretending like he’s a wife at sea at the lighthouse waiting for his husband to return from the war

and look rule #1 is “dont get high iff ur own supply” but curlys always like “i gotta test it out before it gets to my customers” (he just rlly wants to get high and doesnt feel like spending money)

i think tims more baffled at the fact that curly is actually able to take care of a living thing without it going to absolute shit, curly is SO heavy handed its not even funny

he likes to spend or give some of his profit to pony, he wouldnt b here without him🙏🏽🙏🏽

[66sharkteeth]

HIIII omg i am a H U G E fan of you and cob! cob is literally my favorite webtoon ever.... its not enough to just read it, i feel like i need to be enveloped in it (if that even makes sense 😭) every episode literally leaves me shaking with adrenilineeeEEEEE!! (side note i dont have a question i j wanted some way to communicate to you and im sorta new to tumblr so idk any other way lmfao) i literally talk about cob atleast once a day. at this point its an addiction lmfaoo

ive noticed that your tumblr posts are so sad and frustrated recently and i wish there was some way i could help :( if you ever wanted to share ocs or just talk im here and im sure all of your fans would appreciate your art too! maybe you could make another tumblr acct devoted to ocs - ik id definitely follow it immediately :D

also if you decided to take a mental health hiatus your fans wouldnt mind and would in fact encourage it! (ok sure wed be upset cause cob is SO GOOD but overall health is more important!!!) and youd also have more time to work on ocs and to just relax and think about yourslef for once (AND TO NOT LOOK AT THE MEAN COMMENTS ON UR POSTS FROM JEALOUS MEAN PEOPLE WHO HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN CRITICIZE PEOPLE WHO ARE BETTER THAN THEM >:( )

also side note but the more popular you are the more haters you have...its just statistics! so in some twisted overly optimistic way its actually a positive 😉 anyway those ppl r just jealous and have terrible taste.

anyway idk where this is going im j rambling at this point but idk i obviously know barely anything about you but what i can inference from ur posts is that you seriously need a break!!!!! we love cob ofc but we love the health of the creater (YOU) more!!! and if you ever want to talk to anyone or to share ocs youre exited about you can always reach out to me or anything :DDDDD or like anyone you know in real life too lmfaooo--

so uh idk how to end this....so BYE YOURE AWESOME YOURE SLAYING <3333333333

lol you're too sweet! i appreciate every word.

tho unfortunately, taking breaks aren't that easy, since when i don't make episodes, i just don't make money. besides, i actually don't mind the workload that much? it's everything...outside of working that seems to bum me out haha. i kind of like turning off my brain for 10 hours each day to draw episodes. usually when i'm sad, it's after work when that distraction is gone.

also, i do post more freely here already as is! i tend to be a bit more selective about what i share on twitter and IG, but since like 20 people follow me here, i'm a bit more open and share more things, both personal and CoB/OC related lol. i just haven't had a ton to share lately outside of text essays and answering asks.

[flutteringfable]

venti appearance hcs bc i love him he is so silly and has never done anything wrong at all

khanri'ah? destroyed? haha i have no idea what you’re talking about venti is so innocent and soft and would never do such a thing

all jokes aside, i like thinking about scars he might have, or little quirks about his outfit etc. enjoy my silly brainrot about this goofball

this post got very long but honestly considering its about one of my favorite blorbos i’m not surprised

no content warnings aside from maybe mentions of injuries and scars? nothing crazy tho 👍

starting at the top, his hair!

venti tends to sleep in trees a lot (he probably has his own actual house somewhere but he likes to nap in the wild for some reason), so he often has leaves or moss in his hair. he does his best to brush or wash it out when he can, but he hangs out outdoors so often it kind of doesn’t help

the tips of his braids glow when he’s excited, angry, flustered, etc.

no one (except for a choice few people, of course) has really guessed that the hair glow happens because he’s an archon

venti is so eccentric that people are just like “yeah we dunno he’s just like that it’s probs something to do w his vision idk”

sometimes, on particularly hot days or when he needs to keep it out of his face, he pulls it into a sort of half-up ponytail and pins his bangs to the side.

he likes to put feathers in the ends of his braids! he finds finch feathers pretty, and he also likes to use dvalin’s feathers sometimes

dvalin’s feathers glow with his hair, for some reason. maybe its the anemo? maybe it’s their strong connection? who knows

his hair is very fluffy and soft. he washes it often, and it tends to fluff out a little bit when it gets dry. having it braided and then undoing it after a while adds to the fluff.

moving down a bit, his face!

*clears throat into mic, standing in front of thousands of venti fans* glowy freckles.

he has a mix of regular and glowy freckles! they’re a lot more prominent when he’s been out in the sun

he has a really bad habit of chewing on his lips when he’s writing or thinking very hard about something, so while they are soft, there’s always marks and cracks from where he bites them.

his cheeks are almost always rosy since he spends a lot of time outside.

he has some small scars around the edges of his face from when dvalin was a baby and liked to climb all over him (mostly onto his head)

i know archons technically don’t suffer ailments like eyestrain as badly as mortals do, but venti has been writing poetry for thousands of years. he probably gets migraines, and might wear reading glasses to write sometimes.

the glasses are intricately designed, and they’re one of the only things he’s ever saved up money for other than alcohol.

he just liked the pretty ones a lot, especially since they had a sort of winged/angelic theme to their design

i’m not really sure what shape the lenses would be, but i like the idea of them being round. they have a little chain on them that has a feather charm attached. the frames are golden (not actual gold, of course. though venti may or may not have been willing to pay the extra expenses had they been real gold.)

the handles are also golden, and they have feather shaped accents near where the frames connect.

anyway, he wears them out once in a while when he wants to work on his wips at the tavern or on the barbatos statue. he doesn’t drink much when he has them with him, because of course he would prefer to not break his favorite and only pair of glasses by passing out or otherwise.

venti has a bad habit of staying up too long and losing track of time, so occasionally he gets dark circles under his eyes

next up, his build and scars etc!

venti stands at about 5’ 4” (~163 cm)

his clothing hides a lot of the way he’s built, aside from his legs

he has a soft chest and tummy (perfect for putting ur head on for a nice nap)

he has surprisingly toned arms? he’s not noticeably buff like alhaitham or itto but he has a lot of muscle in his arms from using his bow.

speaking of his bow, he has a lot of scars from when he was still learning to use it

there’s a mark on his inner left arm from when he accidentally hit it with his bowstring. it used to happen so often that there’s a faint permanent scar there.

he has a lot of soreness and issues with his hands and wrists because he writes and uses his bow a lot, but it used to be MUCH worse when he was still learning

nowadays he knows how to handle the cramps and aches, but when he was learning, he had no idea how to ease them. he could barely write or play his lyre for a while because archery combined with composing music and poetry was taking a serious toll on his arms and hands.

he gets ink marks on his hands a lot

he paints his nails! he has a lot of different colored polishes but his favorite is a soft teal.

everyone knows about the archon markings on his chest and leg, but i raise you:

archon markings where his wings should be when he isn’t in his god form

which is why he wears the cape, since all his markings tend to glow dimly all the time and his shirt is kind of thin.

and finally, his outfit!

in his mortal form, venti loves to collect feathers, crystals, and flowers. he puts them wherever he can fit them, since he oftentimes doesn’t have a pocket or bag aside from his mora pouch. so, when he goes out to windrise for inspiration (or a nap) m, expect him to return with a windwheel aster weaved into a braid and maybe a dove feather tucked behind his ear.

when he’s embarrassed, venti will pull up both sides of his cape to hide his face in

he also tends to fidget with it and his hair when he’s nervous or bored

in my heart he wears thigh highs, idc what hoyoverse reveals them as if they ever do

somehow, venti has some sort of crazy luck and his socks always stay up. they might get a little bunched up in some places after battles, but they never fall completely.

is it archon stuff? black magic? just a venti thing? top ten questions science still can’t answer

he tends to keep a lot of things in his hat. he doesn’t carry much very often, so he can put a quill, his notebook, and a corked bottle of ink underneath it and carry it wherever he pleases.

the ribbon on his cape is only decorative. the cape actually has a small button and a loop that connects to keep it fastened.

that’s about it! if i think of any more i might edit this list, but i think i got everything i wanted out there. hope you enjoyed, and feel free to share your own venti headcanons! i love him sm i would love new perspectives on him from people who are just as normal about him as me <3

[ohwell-itsme-but-danganronpa]

Situationship to Exes to Lovers [Saiouma Prompt]

Clown: Thinking about saiou being in the middle of completely mundane activities where shuichi casually brings up "I think I'm in love with you" And kokichi immeadiately responds with "You're insane" And they have this conversation like 6 times Ajsgdhdb I just want them to completely brush over it and continue on with whatever they were doing like nothing happened

Dra: Is it done for the "wait that was akward I'll just pretend it didn't happen" way or "I'm unlovable and will ignore it" way

Clown: Hmmm, in like the this is a fun fact we've both fully accepted but aren't ready/ don't feel the need to have a full discussion about it yet But it can be angst, as a treat

Dra: Aww,, waiting until ready my beloved

Beez: i interpreted this as like, theyre already dating, and its just a running inside joke between them kahdkshdjdk

Ves: "love you" "ur just trying to get my money huh" (he is broke) "love you" "YOU POISONED THIS DINNER DIDN'T YOU"

Clown: In the middle of a game of chess "I love you" "your psychological warfare is cheap, really."

Hina: Oh shit we all had different interpretations I thought that this was the first time he says it and it's just. "I love you.", "You're insane." And then they don't adress it, just comfortably live with it

Dra: They move in together and confirm nothing [!! emoji]

Ves: shuuichi knowing kokichi loves him back but he isn't ready to say it yet,,,,,

Clown: I really like the thought of it being really casual, they've found a place that's really comfortable with each other. Enough that shuichi doesn't think twice before casually dropping the bomb because it feels right. And there's no need to pursue it immediately because there's no rush, no judgment between them hehehehe Shuichi just does it whenever he feels like and there's no expectation attached to it because they'll keep going as they are for now

Dra: They comfy,,,,,,,,,

Clown: Okay so now we can angst it

Ves: insecure shuuichi,,,,,,,

Clown: Shuichi becoming really anxious at the lack of answers Maybe meanwhile ouma takes it mostly as shuichi joking around

Ves: i think when kokichi finally says it back it'd be sometime when he doesn't have to face it mumbled into the back of shuuichi's neck in bed..

Dra: Why is he like this [sob emoji]

Ves: terminal clown disease "haha wouldn't it be funny if you actually loved me??? ANYWAY" olympic sprinting from that commitment

Dra: Me @ him

[this wasn't necessary to include, but consider: funny to me]

Clown: Shuichis burying his face in his pillow after the 3rd time ouma seemingly brushes off his confession and meanwhile ouma is just. "Heh, he really though he could get me with that one, oldest trick in the book I'm 6 steps ahead-" Ouma is allergic to heart to hearts he's breaking out into hives

Dra: What would Shu gain from pretending to love him please [sob emoji]

Ves: his CRIMINAL EMPIRE smh dra his WEAKNESSES

Clown: The fact that he feels like he's losing is a crime in itself Shuichi stole his lunch money (feelings)

Ves: seriously though…shuuichi can't wait forever. bro better shape up or he's getting left

Clown: Shuichi starts to distance himself and ouma doubles down on trying to get his attention But its not working and he doesn't quite understand what he's done wrong Maybe shuichi just got tired of him too

Dra: Shu is in "You just want me to entertain you but never care for me back" mode now fuck

Me: oh, they're doomed

Ves: NOOOOOO THEY CAN MAKE UP I BELIEVE IN THEM

Dra: He also blames himself for being distant bc "I fell in love with him who cares if he just wants to use me at least we could spend time together"

Ves: shuuichi's gonna end up The One Who Got Away frrr he breaks the news of a job out of the country.. he leaves. they still never talk about it they basically cut contact but they can meet again years down the line bc i can't take them breaking up FOREVER

Clown: THEY HIT THE SPEEDRUN BUTTON They weren't even dating and they broke up, why are they like this [sob emoji]

Dra: How kicked puppy are they when away from each other

Ves: Maximum for at least a year kokichi never quite gets over it shuuichi moves on a lot more and then they do something stupid af like end up as coworkers

Dra: PETTY ARC

Ves: WOULD THEY BE,,,, i feel like it'd be more awkward and sad kokichi never forgave himself yknow yknow

Dra: I think he'd be "You left me" to Shu a lil

Clown: he tried to confess to him before shuichi left but circumstances made it so shuichi couldn't hear him

Ves: OKAY BUT HE'S GOTTA BE BETTER NOW OR ELSE THEYRE NEVER GETTING TOGETHER- DICE bullied kokichi into therapy after he turned into goo post-breakup okay. he's a leeeettle better at communication now

Dra: One of them sees the other crying over something and they just hug for way too long instead of talking

Ves: they get tipsy at a company bonding outing

Dra: They fall asleep clinging to each other !!

Beez: its the best sleep theyve had in ages /hj

Clown: Okay, okay. Shuichi arriving at the company post a messy breakup who's wary as all hell about hanging around ouma again. He doesn't wanna be hurt again. But its so easy to fall right back into the place he had with ouma and bicker despite the lingering tension. Ouma is post neet era. Took him a bit to accept help from dice and friends but he's finally breaking in there. Shuichi lighthearted asks about his plans to rule the world with his orginazation and ouma shrugs and says "I guess we grew up." They don't talk about anything until the alcohol lmao They're dapper buisness men at a soul sucking company I'm assuming aksbdkdh Where do they work actually??

Ves: i was assuming a detective agency

Dra: And what do they talk about when drunk enough [eyes emoji]

Ves: the good mediocre old times? "we were real stupid back then huh. wanna make out"

Dra: Did Ko become a detective too help

Ves: IT'S ONE OF THE BEST JOBS FOR HIM I'LL DIE ON THIS HILLLLL

Dra: They get fired for this/j [making out]

Ves: they hide in a corner it's fine

Clown: Fully silly speedrun one night stand that they both don't know how to deal with and now they're working on a case together whose events they're going to metaphorically link to their current lives/j

Hina: "This murder is just like the death of our relationship"

Ves: "see how these people didn't communicate, kokichi?? SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM???????"

Dra: Who wakes up/gets sober first [eyes emoji]

Ves: kokichi unfortunately shuuichi is a Squeezer so no escaping for him <333

Clown: He's going to jump out a window to escape alshsk

Ves: NUH UH he tries but shuuichi wakes up they cook breakfast together. it's. An Experience

Dra: They get eggshells in the yolk because fuck them/pl

Ves: these eggshells are also a metaphor for their-[GETS SHOT]

Me: Shuichi waking up groggily, what could he mumble to destroy Kokichi who's already been dying for half an hour?

Dra: An ex's name/j

Me: noooo that's not how I meant it!

Ves: an old petname

Me: YESSS

Ves: for a minute he doesn't even realize all those years've passed,,,,, kokichi's hair is still FUCKING ITCHY-

Hina: No but this was my first thought too It was that or "This was a mistake" Or even "Who are you?"

Ves: THIS IS MEANT TO BE THEIR RECONCILIATION GUYS WGAT THE FUCK

Me: that's as far off from what I wanted as it gets, I was trying to think of something cheesy with extra cheese, like "you stayed,,," is not enough

Dra: He says darling in the most eepy voice ever methinks

Hina: Or even just a "Stay…"

Ves: my goto for Maximum Sap is bunny but i know that makes some people cringe SNDJSBHDFJBGF….hitting him with darling could be an instakill… is he aware of the situation or is it more of a 'nooooo it's too early babe,,,,'

Me: something that was more personal to them, a pet name that clearly has a story behind it unaware, more than half asleep

Ves: if there has to be a Story than i am once again proposing bnuy

Dra: While yes they definitely have that Saiou are also the type of mfs to call each other a random object for the funnies and it sticks

Me: that counts as having a story and being something specific to them

Ves: i maintain that all their petnames start out Stupid

Clown: Called him bunny because ouma wouldn't stop trying to eat cardboard/j

Ves: it was their pens and cords actually. but i think he'd try cardboard if you put it in his hands when he was distracted enough but also a random object? does shuuichi just wake up and say paperclip?

Dra: Yes

Checkers: Kokichi starts calling him Baby Carrot

Ves: did i tell you about the 'punk' one i watch a streamer who apparently started calling her husband pumpkin -> then punkin -> then just punk. i know this because when he comes in the room she says PUNK!! in the most affectionate voice and it's hilarious every time very saioucoded

Clown: Shuichi lovingly calling ouma "punk" beloved

Clown: Okay, so saiou waking up together. Do they talk about it? Or is it an unspoken thing? And will there be a dramatic scene where ouma is physically ripped from his silly little dodging commitment Era when there's a real threat he might lose shuichi forever? /hj

Dra: Maybe not forever but something happens and Shu might have to leave again and he DOES NOT want that

Clown: Ajsgdjdh I was gonna shoot shuichi BUT YES

Me: it was a christmas office party and they got snowed in together I'm talking like. Snowstorm hits as they're eating breakfast, Ouma is watching his plans of leaving asap after they eat and not touching any heavy topics slip through his fingers as it's howling against the windows

Ves: ah, getting snowed in…mother nature's get along sweater the discussion is very stilted but it HAPPENS okay and then they kith <3

Dra: What if they like. Use metaphors. It's hard to actually talk about it so they pretend they're only talking about the weather

Ves: shuuichi starts it as a way to give kokichi an out but still make him Talk

Clown: Shuichi finding ways to get what he wants without sacrificing ouma's lying shield YES

Ves: they communicate strangely but they still do

Dra: Something something "The windows can't hold the snow out forever, they'll either need stronger support or the wind should be considerate and calm down" (I knew you weren't ready but it kept hurting me when you avoided me and I couldn't take it anymore.)

Ves: as the serious conversation (and coded apologies) eases down it just gets. Silly bad adult film dialogue they're both giggling like 'hmmm maybe the wind should get on over here then-' 'i sure like the feeling of the wind on my face' and they just double over wheezing they're so fucking annoying <3 their coworkers have a bigger storm coming than the snow one smh it turns out they're insanely good at solving cases together. but GOD are they obnoxious-

Dra: PDA is officially in

Clown: Everyone's walked in on them making out in the closet at least once

Dra: Imagine them praising each other in the already small cubicles after solving cases sjgjdj

Ves: i am a coworker kinnie now. if i have to hear about shuuichi's massive sexy throbbing wrinkly brain one more time i set off the fucking bombs they are communicating their affection TOO MUCH!!! GO BACK [after everyone starred it] so ur enjoyers of shuuichi's sexy brainmeat then????????

Hina: NO Shuichi Saihara is not sexy

Ves: -kokichi, in the denial phase

Dra: They call each other partner. Work and gay

Dra: They solve a really heavy case together and it impacts one of them and hurt comfort,, Points at Shu He can relive the first case tm methinks

Ves: he stumbles away from the scene and kokichi chases after to let him hide his eyes in his neck just huggin on the curb,, he doesn't want anybody to look at him :((

Dra: Can they be silly for a moment,, Kokichi tells him to close his eyes and just guides him until Shu feels better

Ves: he slaps his little babyhands over shuuichi's face "cmon, cmon, don't you trust me??"

Dra: Makes him walk into stuff for the funny/j

Apollo: Ngl, I love the 'guess we just grew up stuff' because you can angst it so fucking hard if you try hard enough

Like they always talked about ruling the world but they actually meant making a safe space for misfits like them. They wanted to change the world for the better and if at least one kid didn't have to go through what they did, it meant they'd won.

Shuichi knows this and to hear Kokichi say it was all just childish wishes? It hurts so much because Shu knows that he can help people. Hell, he's done it by becoming a detective.

Yet he gave up so easily… He's not the Kokichi he left behind that's for sure

Shuichi doesn't know how to react. Here's the guy who broke his heart (by accident mind you) who had an honestly noble dream and he just…Gave up. Kokichi Ouma gave up on something.

Now imagine this. DICE also broke up. They all decided it was time to grow up and felt they couldn't if they stayed in their silly little clown group

They have some contact with each other but have sorta drifted away like multiple friendship groups do Kokichi pretends it doesn't hurt him as much as it does

Shuichi doesn't know how to react. He can tell it hurts but he also knows Kokichi will deny it.

Theres also a tiny sick part of him that wonders if it's a good thing Kokichi is suffering at the breakup of his group because Kokichi broke his heart. Shuichi hates that part of him

LIKE A SMALL PART THINKS IT'S KARMA THEN HE WANTS TO PUNCH HIMSELF BECAUSE YEAH KOKICHI PLAYED WITH HIS FEELINGS OR WHATEVER BUT DICE WAS KOKICHI'S FAMILY AND NOW THEY'VE SPLIT UP AND KOKICHI IS THROWINFG HIMSELF INTO HIS WORK TO AN ALMOST UNHEALTHY DEGREE TO DISTRACT FROM THE LONELYNESS AND PAIN

Clown: AND PART OF HIM IS RIGHT. EVEN OUMA THINKS SO. HE KNOWS WELL ENOUGH THAT OUMA WAS ENTIRELY CAPABLE OF NOT BEING GOOD. Sometimes Ouma sucks and sometimes that has consequences. It doesn't mean he hasn't learned, but it also doesn't mean those effects went away. Ouma blames himself for a lot and somehow it hurts a bit to come to the understanding ouma's feelings aren't that far off from his own in that case They're better now tho

Apollo: They're better but it takes time Shuichi is glad that Kokichi had gotten better but those consequences are low-key permanent but at the same time, that's life Shu gives him a big hug though when he finally breaks down over it all

Clown: With ouma slowly growing distant to dice to the point where they rarely talk…I think it would partially be his own fault too.

They're family, they'll never not love each other. But they have their own lives, own goals, own families now. And so they'll never be as close as they were when the corralled behind ouma as their leader. Its a big change. And there's only so much they can do when their schedules conflict or Ouma doesn't respond to their texts.

They know Ouma, you don't spend a good chunk of your formative years together and don't learn something. And what they've learned is that ouma has to do it by himself.

He has to make the effort to reach out to them, he has to start extending his hand out to them again. They'll be waiting for when he does

Shuichi being the first push into getting him to do that and rebuild his family, its different now, but its just as good

Apollo: With Shuichi, there was no promise that he'd be coming back nor a promise he'd answer any messages but DICE? DICE was with him through thick and thin and know how his mind ticks.

They know that despite not talking to them for ages, he still cares about them.

He just doesn't want to bother them is all but thanks to reconnecting with Shuichi, he's able to reach out to them and become apart of their lives again

Ves: he's pushed himself out of his heartbroken NEET era and reconnected with shuuichi but DICE is harder DICE are divided on Shuuichi Opinions on the one hand it was super kokichi's fault they broke up. on the other SHUUICHI BROKE HIS HEART >:(

Apollo: Kokichi's right hand man eventually pulls Shu to the side to talk everything out and reminds him of how unused Kokichi is to being cared for by people other than DICE and that's why he never said 'I love you' back and just treated it like a joke. He wasn't used to be loved and still isn't in a way that's not family

Ves: "also he never got over you and if you leave him again i think he might actually die. good luck!" /J/J kokichi is so demi to me it's crazyyy he has no idea how tf to handle romantic love (or how to get over it!) it's not something that's supposed to Happen to him

Apollo: Poor Shuichi though. He got to move on and Kokichi never did

Ves: he mentions someone he dated in those intervening years and kokichi is so violently reminded of his miserable lonely NEET time that he makes up a guy

Apollo: He's just fumbling to describe this guy and Shuichi just nods along

Ves: HAHA YEAH WE BOTH HAD A LOT OF FUN HUH. LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY VERY REAL VERY SEXY EX JEFFERSON RYAN GRANT HE HAS. SKIN. AND HAIR

Apollo: "Oh and we totally did alllll the sex!" "Sure Ko."

Ves: hey so they were just in an unnamed roommates situationship before right did they even HAS KOKICHI OUMA EVER KNOWN THE TOUCH OF ANOTHER

Apollo: HE'S A NEET THE HELL DO YOU THINK? /J

Ves: HE WASN'T BEFORE HE ENTERED NEET ARC OUT OF HEARTBREAK THEY HAD A BREAKUP THAT MESSY AND DIDN'T EVEN FUCK!?

Apollo: DO YOU THINK KOKICHI 'CAN'T TELL PEOPLE MEAN IT WHEN THEY SAY THEY LOVE HIM' OUMA FUCKED SOMEONE?

Ves: this is so embarrassing for him was. was that drunk one night stand his FIRST TIME?????????

Apollo: OH GOD WAS IT? IMAGINE HIM TELLING SHU THAT YEAH WE WERE DRUNK AND YOU TOOK MY V CARD Shuichi just pauses because he knew Kokichi had becoem a NEET after he left but he somehow didn't expect this Shuichi said Let's get drunk and throw out that card /j

Me: no… I was under the full assumption that they did, and were dating, Kokichi just didn't believe Shuichi loves him & didn't say he loves him because of that, the pet name scene doesn't make sense otherwise, it was because he was thrown back to waking up together

Apollo: Me waking up every morning: How can I ruin the Pit's day today?

Me: today by trying to make Ouma a virgin, apparently, but I won't let you they fucked, I know this in my heart, it's okay of course they were fucking, they were roommates, fucking is a lot easier than talking about feelings bet they even had a situation (or multiple) when things escalated that way as to avoid talking about feelings, Kokichi kissing him so he doesn't have to reply to something

Ves: you can ABSOLUTELY have a petname for ur roommate but i see the vision actually. ouma using physical affection to avoid verbal,,,OUGH

Me: yeah, but it's about waking up together and slipping into the old act because he's done it many times it just felt so familiar to wake up this way that he said it without thinking!!!

Clown: Thinking about ouma calling one of the dices members for the first time in a long while and they don't yell at him, they aren't even disappointed. They just start immediately gushing about how wow! They have so much to talk about. And ouma has a moment where he finds they've grown so much without him realizing. He doesn't have to protect them anymore. And they're having lunch on a Saturday and a weight falls of his shoulders for the first time in a while

Apollo: Kokichi gives a wobbly smile and they ask what's wrong and he says he's so relieved they're doing so well and that he missed them. He gets teased for being a sap despite them tearing up as well One of his former classmates is also at the cafe and is just like Fuck they're back together Maki screaming internally because Kokichi knows where she works

Clown: What crimes will they commit? Maki Cafe worker real??? :0

Apollo: Kokichi makes the worst sugar riddled drinks. He just grins while requesting the worst thing ever

Clown: He can't even finish them half the time he's just doing it out of spite

[nomizombie]

König’s first CNY 🧧🥢🎊

boyfriend!König x afab?GN!reader

[SFW/Fluff/Wholesome] ; basically celebrating lny/cny with ur boyfriend, könig (very self indulgent haha), i guess this one is aimed towards people with female bodies? … since the reader wears a qipao, but if you wanna wear one and you have a male body thats okay too! :)), no usage of pronouns, no y/n

[A/N] ; 新年快乐 (xīn nián kuài lè) to my fellow chinese/singaporeans/anyone else celebrating!! Just got my ang paos from my extended family. Ahh I think my back is gonna break from the amount of bowing i had to do tho…

He had never seen so many people wearing red at the same time. Red floral qipaos, red bows, red shirts, and of course… red envelopes.

That morning, you handed him one too, although you arent technically aren't supposed to.

He accepted it, a puzzled look in his eyes as he opened it and expected a letter of some kind. Instead, a couple euros laid within.

“Lieb, what is this?” He asked, very very confused.

“It's an ang bao, silly.” you laughed.

He stared at it again, even more confused. Perplexed eyes roaming all over the package.

“An, ang… bao?” He struggled to pronounce it, german accent and all.

“For chinese new year.” You happily smiled at him while he clutched the bright red envelope in between his massive fingers.

“You give me… money?” He asked again, worried you thought he was in need.

“You really dont have to i have enough schatzi-“

“No, no, no! Its a tradition!” You giggled, “every CNY you give away red packets to kids and other adults!”

He blinked at you.

“So you give me money for…?”

“Just take it!” You pressed the envelope against him.

He smiled at you.

“Chinese new year is awesome.” He laughed.

Later that day, as the two of you were getting dressed to visit your relatives, he stumbled into your room looking for his watch. Thats when he found you staring at yourself in the mirror, donning a scarlet qipao.

He couldve sworn his jaw dropped.

You turned around, red, fitting since its chinese new year.

“König! Youre done already?”

He continued staring at you, eyes wide and mouth agape.

“You look… really good.” Is all he could manage. How was he supposed to put your beauty into words?

You stared up at him as you tugged at the sides of the floral garment nervously.

“Thanks.” You said, eyes dropping to the floor in embarrassment.

He smiled at your bashfulness. He had seen you wear dresses a million times at this point but for some reason, a qipao was different.

Once the two of you arrived at your relatives home, he was immediately bombarded with a tsunami of aunts and uncles fawning over him. Labelling him as your “tall boy”.

While he was left in a encircling swarm of relatives pinching at his cheeks and asking him questions that were much too personal, you were free to eat as much of the feast without any ‘thats too much’ remarks. Also free to pray to the shrine in the corner without some stingy uncle saying your ‘qipao was too short’.

You would have to cuddle him for a few hours at least as an apology. His limit is 2 people for a maximum of half an hour.

When he finally broke free from the crowd of relatives, he found you curled up on the couch watching a lion dance performance on TV. He playfully slapped your shoulder, clearly feeling betrayed after you abandoned him.

“Sorry.” You cheekily grinned at him. You were full of delicious food and he was drained of all his energy. Eh, he’d live.

“Can we go home now..?” He said meekly, voice raspy from all the answering he had done. More words said in one hour than he had ever said in a year.

You rubbed his head as he dropped it into the crook of your neck.

“Sure. Just let me get one more bite of the roast duck and then-“

He stopped you, pressing a finger to your lips.

“I swear I will die here, schatz. If we dont leave now, I might go insane.” He hissed at you.

You laughed. He was always so dramatic. Either way, he would have to get used to it. You planned on bringing him to every gathering from now on.

“新年快乐, König.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek, snickering.

新年快乐 = xīn nián kuài lè ("happy chinese new year")

oh god my back still hurts from all the bowing 😭😭 ang paos make the pain worth it tho :33

[mayasaurusss]

WAIT if ur still taking adult lottie requests im obsessed with the idea of going shopping or something with her or otherwise spending her family money lmao,, she doesn’t leave the wellness center a lot and I feel like she doesn’t spend a whole lot of money in general after it becomes self sustaining so any time she would go out with reader into the “real” world in public she would almost make a mission of spending as much as she could just because she can

and she has such style too with her clothes and everything ,, im imagining trying on outfits and showing each other and picking out clothes for each other to try on

and she would get so smug too buying you things!!! we know she loves to flex in any way possible

Sorry, this is a little bit shorter than usual... I hope you can enjoy it regardless!! (also sorry for the long wait!)

Everytime you and Lottie go shopping she will buy you ANYTHING.

When your relationship started, you mentioned to her how growing up your family couldn't afford to buy you presents for your birthday.

From that moment on, Lottie makes it her life mission to spend for you as much money as she can.

You just had to buy some new materials for her beekeeping but your attention is chaught by a beautiful set of clothes. Lottie immediatley notices how you look at them and insists in buying them.

You try to convince her that you don't really need them, but it's set. She's more stubborn than it looks.

That cute t-shirt you saw? Bought. That book you've been meaning to read? Bought.

At one point you will beg her to stop buying you stuff, but she can't help it, "But I want to make you happy, love".

If you already scolded her for spending money but she saw you eyeing something, she will subtly buy it regardless.

She waits until you've stranded away from her and buy whatever you wanted. You will get a bit angry at her, but you know she means well.

She will think to herself smugly "Haha look, I'm a provider" while you hid your face in your hands.

She will drag you to a niche hippy clothes shop. It's where she gets her singatures dresses and clothes. She will pick many of them, and to you they all look the same, but she insists that "This one is heliotrope while this one is purple, keep up".

Then, comes the time for the 'private fashion show'. Each of you has already tried on clothes but you will show your partner how they look on you.

Lottie will have countless vests, dresses and some tight shirts, but her wardrobe is pretty uniformal. She always sports the biggest smile when showing them to you, puppy eyes staring at you and all that.

And when it's your turn, she looks absolutley memersized. "How did I ended up having such a beautiful person at my side?" she murmurs with love and affection in her eyes.

Sometimes if you're lucky you and Lottie will have more... intimate moments. She will run her hands on your shoulders, lips to your ears "So, shall we take these off?".

[yelenasdiary]

https://www.tumblr.com/yelenasdiary/716709431072768000/i-will-be-closing-my-requests-in-24-hours

Could I request dkol where Dylan finds out a little smth about what his beloved auntie Nat does? Like obviously not the whole truth but maybe he finds out a little bit about her darker side, and r and nat need to scramble to hide it from him or smth? Idk HAHA if nothing comes to mind no worries! Thank u for all ur amazing writing!

Drabble || Questions

Pairing: CEO! MobBoss! Natasha Romanoff x Single Mom! Reader (Platonic)

Summary: After Dylan listens in on one of Natasha’s calls, he has a few questions for his favorite aunt!

Angst? | Comfort | Dark! Nat | Slight Language Warning | Mentions of Blood | Keep in mind Dylan is a child so dialog is meant to be a little off | 0.7K | 

Notes: It’s been a while since I revisited this little AU! I hope you enjoy this x 

Different Kind of Love Masterlist

"I don't fucking care!" Natasha shouted from her office, causing Dylan to stop playing with his toys almost instantly. You'd gone out for coffee with a friend and of course, Natasha was more than happy to watch Dylan to give you some time to really enjoy yourself. "I want my money!" Nat shouted once again. 

Curious as to why his aunt was yelling, Dylan crept down the hall to the room he was forbidden to ever enter. The door was opened a slight crack and the little boy was just wanting to make sure his aunty was okay as he pressed his ear against the door to listen more about the conversation. 

"If you care about your life, you'll transfer me the money. If not, I promise not a single fucking soul will ever find your body!" Natasha spoke with deep anger. "You have until 7pm tonight, I won't warn you again!" she added before slamming the phone down. Dylan slowly pushed the door open and looked at Natasha with worried eyes. 

"Aunty Nat? everything okay?" he asked, playing with the hem of his t-shirt. 

Natasha looked up from her desk and saw the young boy looking at her with his big, worried eyes and scared body language and instantly she knew that he had heard her harsh threats towards the businessman. "Hi love, everything is just fine. Come here" she opened her arms wide for him. Dylan ran to her, crashing into her arms as she picked him up and placed him on her knee. 

"What are you doing down here?" she asked before gently brushing some of his locks of curls back out of his face. "I heard you yelling at the phone" he replied, still playing with the hem of his t-shirt, "why do you yell at the phone? Did somebody hurt you aunty Nat?" he asked before slowly looking up at Natasha. 

She shook her head, "no baby, I was just a little angry. You know how sometimes you get a little angry at school when somebody doesn't share the coloured pencils with you?" 

Dylan nodded, "well, that's how Natty feels" she assured him. 

"But you said nobody was going to find the person's body" 

Just as the words left his lips, Natasha heard your voice announcing that you were back. "We're in the office!" Natasha called out before swallowing the lump in her throat while she tried to think of a way to explain to Dylan why she was so mean to the man on the other end of the phone. 

"Hi!" You smiled as you saw Dylan sitting on Natasha's knee, "were you good for Aunt Nat?" you asked. 

"He's been great" Natasha replied but you could sense there was something wrong, Dylan didn't look like his normal happy self. "Is somebody tired?" you asked your son who shook his head, "Aunt Nat was yelling at the phone" he replied. Your eyes shifted to Natasha, "I was just explaining that sometimes people get mad at others and we say things we don't mean" Nat explained but Dylan was buying it. 

"But what about the blood on your shoes?" Dylan asked. 

"What blood?" both you and Natasha asked in sync. 

"You asked the maid to clean the blood off your shoes" Dylan explained. "Oh, that? Well som-"

"Aunty Natty helps training people in boxing" you interrupted, your eyes shot open as to hint to Natasha to go along with it. "That's right, and the man on the phone hasn't paid for his training session and I got a little too mad" Nat added, going along with your lie. 

"I thought you worked with mommy?" The little boy questioned. 

"I do, I have two jobs" 

"Why don't you have two jobs mommy?" Your son looked at you. You couldn't help but chuckle, "I don't need two jobs baby, if I had two jobs, I would never have time to spend with you. Aunt Nat is lucky because she's mommy's boss so she can make her own hours and she also makes sure that mommy doesn't have to spend too much time away from you" you explained.

There was a moment of silence before Dylan spoke again, "I hope I can have two jobs when I grow up!" he said as he slid off Natasha's knee, and ran towards you, "can I please have a strawberry milkshake now?" Dylan looked up at you. To your relief, it seemed that Dylan was no longer worried about the activities that Natasha kept in the dark. 

"Of course, come on" you smiled, taking his hand.

Taglist: @marvelogic | @randomnessbecausewhynot | @blackwidow-3 | @lilsmeaux | @mmmmokdok | @wandanats-goodgirl | @toouncreativeforausername | @agent99galanzo | @marvelwomen-simp | @its-just-geek | @fxckmiup | @loneliestafterparty | @pikachooo3 | @monaekelis | 

[spiritual-messages]

~from your guides pac 🤍

Hey there

First of all i'd like to thank you all for showing so much love on my first reading .I appreciate all the feedbacks , likes and reblogs 🥺

Bless!

Here's the christmas pac im doing

So todays reading is all about messages and advice from your spirit guidesss .. (So those who don't know each and every person has a spirit guide that help them a guide them throughout this journey of life and you can have 1 or more spirit guides )

So before we start I want you to take a few deep breaths and center yourself .. Now pick a pile you are attracted to the most haha!

:) letsss take a moment to appreciate how beautiful all the pictures are

The pictures aren't mine and are taken from pinterest credit to the owners thank yaaa! Bless

Pile 1 ------ pile 2

Pile 3

Pile 1

Alright pileee oneee welcome to your reading

Current Energy :

Ahahaha .. So I heard " emotional healing " 👀 you guys are healers... I see alot of water and earth energy coming.. Wussup virgos and scorpios , heyaaa taurus hahaha alrghtieee so lets get it lets go..

So right now i see you guys healing .. Smth damaged you emotionally I see .. stop worrying about ppl who dont appreciate your care please don't cry becz of those stupid brats .. Why hurting yourself .. Thats not righttt ...

Message from your guides :

" I know that you are empathetic and I know that you can't see people in pain... You can't help but lend a hand to those in need .. Even if it emotionally drain you... But you need realise that some people are just energy suckers .. Vampires who drain you and leave you tired and overwhelmed. . you need to realise that your energy and well being

comes first .. You are not caring about your cup trying while to fill their's and that leaves you being exhausted .. Stressed and overwhelmed .. ( please stay away from energy vampires they mean no good and helping them isn't worthy at all becz they will be the same again they never learn pleasee watch out...) Dear one we cant even blame you becz you have an ability to attract all those unhealed souls ( scorpio moon energy) they are attracted to you becz you have so much power to heal others and to make others feel comfortable with you ( you might even have noticed that people get comfortable around way tooo quick and you might even have noticed them opening up to you way faster .. Letting you know all their secrets .. You might also feel other's pain as if they are ur own and you don't judge them .. Also you guys are masters in manifesting) but first heal yourself .. Watch out for such ppl who comes to you only when they are sad .. You have such positive aura around .. But you are letting those people kill your vibe don't do such stuff .. Focus on yourself.. Give time to yourself .. ( you might even leave all your work to listen to ppl who are sad you are so pure)"

Advice :

your guides are telling you to start being protective over your energy and be cautious about who you decide to pour this energy on.. Make sure that they learn and grow by your help.. If they are stuck even after helping to much just let them go .. Universe is fair to all .. Don't trust people that easily .. I also feel as if you guys helped someone with money and they aren't returning it ? And are even asking for more.. don't!👀 telling ya they lying about what they need that money for.. Dont invest in such ppl 👀 ... So if you have a question like " is this the truth " or anything else.. The answer is yes! Bless please make your friend circle smaller and cut out all the toxic ppl.. It will get lonely but trust me .. The journey will lead you to pure brightness

Thats all.. I wish you a very best future and advice you to meditate atleast 15 mins per day . cut out those vampiesss otherwise they will continue to make you feel overwhelmed. . invest your energy in ppl who are worthy of that

Bless ❤️

Pile 2

Current energy :

Alrightie pile 2 welcome to your readinghhhh Uffff so heavy energy here.. I feel as if im stuck somewhere and am unable to move .. Oh my god guys are you alright ? chin up you got this alright! Dont give upppp... Guys i see your are dealing with family issues .. I see conflicts and abusive family (that's sad.. ) so for some of you I see that you wanna move out and wanna be separated from your family and for others I see your family causing trouble in your relationship ..

Message from your guides :

" my dear I know what you have been through .. I know that they never supported you and gave you love like other parents did to their children. . I know that you never showed that it hurted you but deep inside you wish to have a cute loving family .. I know you just want someone to call a family and one to embrace when nights get colder.. One to support you when you are broken and one to pour all your love on .. Its okay love .. Be positive and move .. Have faith on us on universe .. You'll be able to achieve a great family in future .. We are sending a soulmate into your life who can love and cherish you and give you all the precious things you deserve .. Stay strong . we know you feel stuck and often feel like you cant get outta this situation but thats no truth.. Trust the universe.. Transformation will occur.. And things will change.. You'll get all the money you ever wanted to get you life in balance and get a love who will hug you so tight that all those broken pieces of your heart will stick right back ( guys for some of you I feel like someone in your family do drugs and have unhealthy addiction .. And that person cause chaos .. Your inner child is completely traumatised... please have faith .. I wish everything best for you .. You are too precious ) I know that your family doesnt value your opinions and you often feel controlled and manipulated. . but soon there will be someone who will help you.till then help yourself. And move .. You can create a life that you want and you will .. Have faith on yourself!"

Advice :

All right .. Your guides are telling you to trust the universe and be positive .. Dont give up and try to cheer urself up by positive affirmation. . they are telling you to notice the signs they are sending you " 222 , 111 ,555 and 2222" very soon a transformation will occur that will change your life .. I see a soulmate coming in your life .. For some of you this will be your future spouse .. They will help you to get outta all this dumb shit created by your family .. And will heal you till then make decisions and be determined have faith u got this done... Let's go so proud of you you did greattt job

I wish you all the best

Bless ❤️

Pile 3

Energy:

Alrightie pile threeh welcome to your reading 😂 haha .. So so soo i see alot going on .. I see that someone from your past is coming back into your life .. Possibly an ex ? Someone whom you cutted all the cords with.. .. I see you guys rn in a healthy relationship or living a great life .. But this past person steps in and the chaos begins ( well fuck past and fuck maths thats what I was used to say when I was a teenager )

Message from your guides :

" .. The lights thats around you .. Is coming from yourself .. Thats because you are positive ans you have to let that light shine within yourself.. Dont let past come back. . remember all the lessons you learnt .. Trust that once a cheater will always be a cheater .. You worked hard to build what you are to day .. Dont let some cheap chipmunks destroy that progress .. They must have realised how good you were but trust it they just want you for what you are today ans will continue to hurt you again . dont let people use you .. ( lets go girl/ boi you are the baddest bitch .. You got it!! Go walk all over him/her .. Let that punk rub his nose on the ground for you .. Fucking spit on his wreakass ugly face .. Dont let that rotten fish destroy your future fuck ittt!!) Remember why you choosed to move on .. And now you have new opportunities waiting for you so get it "

Advice :

I heard " beat that ass up bitch go beattt that ass like damn" damn you are kicking asses i see wooho cheers to my pile three damn im smiling proudly.

Okay so lemme calm my damn self down and continue the reading bruh 😂 so your guides are advising you to kick ass well not really ( well good idea ah mhmhmmm ) well they are telling you not to look back because I see you have manifested a soulmate .. And if you aew in a toxic relationships break up just go free yourself from that shit .. Work on yourself and be proud of you have achieved pat yourself on the backs ❤️ if you are in a relationship which is healthy and someone from past came back just kick that past person out .. Becz you are or will be in a relationship with your soulmate thats healthy .. Just go ittt rhrrrrr

Bless !

so I hope it resonates thank you .. I wish you a great future and an awesome day ... Remember that you are the creator of your damn reality and you fucking know how to handle that power .. So chin up .. You rock this shit .. Keep grinding ( i caught you u naughty little not that grinding you dirtyminded bitch)

Lemme know what pile you picked haha and this is a general reading so take what resonates and let other shit flow off

Feedbacks are appreciated ❤️ so much grateful for the love you showed on my last reading 🥺 thank youuu

Bless bahhhbayeee

[gurathins]

Hi I still love Toby and I got a new question 🙈 again I'm sorry if you have shared this before, but in cynosure, why did Toby leave the project? And why does Toby come back? Did it not trust anyone else? 🤔🤔 Tyyy 💗

HIIIII oughhh thank you so much for asking hehehe i love talking about it and all the others sm so dw abt it hehehe <3

Toby left the original project (that happens ~20 years before Cynosure events) because, well, it kinda got thrown out due to trying to whistleblow the project (and fucking up during that 😭). Basically long story short, some of the corporate bosses decided to use the med tech it was designing for something else instead of what Toby & co were originally thinking. Toby's then-boyfriend (and honestly almost fiance) Jack found it out while looking through steering group reports and finding this one that they forgot to classify and told Toby abt it and it basically started panicking and thinking it's its fault or something.... which is not really what happened but our little butch loves blaming itself for literally anything 🥴 um anyway.

They both decided to contact media to bring this up, and some anonymous guy replied to them that he needs the full report. Well, sure. The problem? It's on a physical data drive in a secured place.

So they plan a small heist with their friends, etc etc, and at first everything was going smoothly, until some guard that wasn't supposed to be there shows up.

Jack ends up shooting the guard and Tobias, instead of escaping with them all, decided to stay and help the guard so they wouldn't die. Jack tries to persuade it to come with them and Tobias tries to persuade him to stay instead, and Jack just ended up leaving :/ Toby stays until more guards and med personnel arrive.

They take it for questioning and ask what the fuck it was thinking and all. Normally Toby's corporation doesn't really react lightly on whistleblowing attempts and honestly its thoughts were basically going "ohhh fuck they're going to kill me" or something the whole time, until some of its bosses pulled some strings and went "hey this guy's kinda important and smart we should keep it alive look at it even saved a guard".

AND SO they get a deal: Tobias gives all its information on the project it ever had (all the notes, materials and stuff like that, even some 3am random thoughts about the project), and basically helps out with one small thing. The project is closed, with all things related to it saved in an archive. Toby's file is classified in the corporation's database and they basically leave it alone as long as it leaves them along. Everyone is happy (kinda).

Side tracking here but, what happened to Jack, you may ask? Well, Toby asked the same thing from the corporates. The answer? Well, they explained to it that they were shadowing it, trying to find out who commissioned the heist, but when they arrived they only found Jack & co's bodies... Clearly whoever wanted that information didn't want to share the money 😬 (this gets an explanation a few years later when Toby's doing its chemistry master's and its new friend Klara needs some help haha).

UM ANYWAY. CYNOSURE! Like I said in the intro, the two corporations get into a violent fight and to "make it up" decide to work together on some project. Someone somehow managed to find the files of this old project and went "hey look at this we should bring this back". And so they start to look for the lead scientists to work on the team.

Due to connections of academic world, some corporate guy manages to reach Toby's boss and go "hey so u r friends with this guy, right? we have a job for it" and Toby's boss tells that to Toby and it goes "uh. no. nope."

Klara, as someone who works in intercorporational relations of the same organization, gets chosen into this weird admin team of the project and her boss is like "hey we really need ur wife here can u tell it that 🥺" and, well, let's just say that Klara is a very good negotiator. Though let's be honest the only way she managed to get Toby on board was going "hey if something happens i'll protect you" or something. well, technically that happened yeah. a bit too late but yea.

While Klara is the biggest reason it actually considered it, Tobias has been in fact a bit salty that it never got to finish trying out the idea that brought it a pharma phd, so it was also interested in seeing it through 😭 It also thought that maybe going there as someone who's been there before it could maybe do things better and make sure that the corporations won't ruin it again. Plus it loved the idea of getting to take care of a group of chemists and help them 🥰

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

Lmfaooo I know I already yapped my way into ur inbox earlier but. Sighhhh aroace reader has been on my mind again and I’m literally screaming clutching my torso rolling around on the floor crying thinking about it no joke <///333

I think that aroace reader + stsg comes with SO much comedic potential I physically cannot 😭😭 especially with reader who’s pretty much romance averse with satosugu (secretly) being their exception… like maybe shoko and utahime end up talking about their love lives and ask reader about THEIR love life and reader just deadpans “oh I don’t do romance. Doesn’t interest me” and satosugu (particular toru) are just like “….🙁ok but but but but but but-“ LMFAOO BUT THIS ALSO WORKS WITH READER WHOS COMPLETELY UNAWARE OF HOW STSG FEEL ABOUT THEM DESPITE IT BEING OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE ELSE???? imagine being with them out in public, being all affectionate n shit and then a cashier asks “oh are you guys dating? :)” and before either of them can get a word in ur just like “oh no, we’re just close friends haha!!! I know it looks like we do but none of us having feelings for each other at all haha!!!!” And they just look so fucking dejected like satorus shoulders slump and he puts on such a babyish pout…… and sugus just nodding and smiling along (he’s trying not to start screaming and crying on the floor) or maybe someone comes up to you and asks for your number before noticing suguru with his arm wrapped around your waist and satoru who’s got his arm around your shoulders and is looking at you like you hung the stars with your bare hands n the person is like “oh sorry I didn’t notice you guys are dating!!!” But reader is just like “huh?? No we’re not dating u can have my number!!” LMFAOOO I CAN SEE SATORU PULLING THIS FACE

They’re so funny I actually cannotttt 😭😭😭 another thing that’s been on my mind is that if sugu didn’t leave and stsg + reader sorted out their feelings for each other, they could all be teen parents to little Megumi ☹️☹️ satoru gets some money from his rich aah family (cause no way they aren’t rich cmon he was spoiled as a kid) and buys a nice apartment for you all, maybe somewhere by the sea… firm believer that suguru is the mother of all time like. He absolutely makes pancakes with syrup and blueberries and whatever else for u all in the morning……. U guys wake up early in the morning sometimes when it’s still a little dark with Megumi in his tiny little raincoat and take him out for walks by the beach….. collecting pretty rocks and seashells….. megumis dogs swimming in the ocean and satoru skipping stones while sugu reminds him not to go too close incase the tide comes in unexpectedly and he gets his shoes soaked…… I gotta stop myself now or else I’ll go on the lengthiest sugu rant you’ve ever seen but. You get the idea. Sugu being a caretaker mommy for one actual baby and one baby that’s actually a tall pouty bastard that’s so insufferably charming <//333 and you ofc!!! (His favourite baby) (joke he adores you all equally) (even if he lovingly pretends satoru is his least favourite)

HAAHHAAAAA I SERIOUSLY CANT STOP THINKING AB THEM I NEED HELP 😭😭😭 AS ALWAYS I HOPE UR DOING ALRIGHT N TAKING CARE OF URSELF!!! AND ARIIIII the merman sugu asks you’ve been getting have actually been making me laugh my ass off everytimeeeee 😭😭 sugu flopping around like a seal and hating all humans except reader is so fucking funny to me like he’s just straight up dissing the human race but just looks you dead in the eyes and says “but you’re one of the good ones” GOODBYEEEEE 💀💀💀 ANYWAYS HOW HAVE U BEEN???? UP TO ANYTHING INTERESTING??? :3 🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤 gives u a flower + pancakes (sugu made them) u deserve it mwah mwah hope ur ok <333 🌷🥞

OLLIEEEEEE IT’S ALWAYS GREAT TO SEE U IN MY INBOX DW !!! we are yapping together 🫂🫂

PHDJDGDHDH THIS CONCEPT MEANS THE WORLD TO ME I HOPE U KNOW THAT 😭😭…. aroace!reader makes us all insane god bless. u are so REAL for mentioning the comedic potential bc it’s literally so beautiful….. i think i’m biased towards this option:

reader who’s pretty much romance averse with satosugu (secretly) being their exception… like maybe shoko and utahime end up talking about their love lives and ask reader about THEIR love life and reader just deadpans “oh I don’t do romance. Doesn’t interest me” and satosugu (particular toru) are just like “….🙁ok but but but but but but-“

IT’S JUST SOOOO FUNNY AND SWEET…. but i think stsg would also be so smug abt being reader’s exceptions 😭😭 losers. lovesick fools. utahime is just like… don’t you and those idiots have a thing 🤨🤨 and reader just goes well yeah but that’s different. they’re satoru and suguru. <- as if it’s just the most obvious thing in the world and stsg are sitting there all quiet and smug….. mentally squealing……… idk i just lovelovelove the idea of reader being very blunt with their emotions because they just don’t view romance in the same way others would and it flusters stsg Every Single Time. they used to always daydream abt being teasing bfs and making them flustered by acting all lovey-dovey but as it turns out they’re the ones who keep getting caught off guard by reader….

this is rlly just a random thought but. i’m just imagining them in the future, living together, not necessarily labelled in any way but they very much Love each other… suguru is smoking by the balcony late at night (he’s planning on quitting bc he doesn’t want to worry his babies <3) while satoru & reader are keeping him company… and reader just casually mentions that they want to live with stsg forever. that they’re happiest like that and don’t ever want it to end. and they’re just bluntly telling the truth but suguru and satoru are genuinely Losing It bc????? did we just get proposed to ????????? satoru is oddly quiet bc he’s trying to stop himself from blushing and suguru just clears his throat and tells reader that they feel the same way ….. but he’s not nearly as suave as usual bc he is in fact getting choked up LMAOO i love them sm they’re so silly ….. T—T

ok but back to ur lovely thoughts !!!! the idea of aroace!reader being oblivious is also rlly charming to me 😭😭 SATORU MAKING THAT FACE LMAO HE SOOO WOULD ……. i picture suguru just kinda twitching lol like he’s trying sooo hard to keep it together but a part of him kinda wants to kiss reader all over their pretty face so that they get the message. (jokes on him bc reader would somehow still assume that it was just … platonic kissing … just kissing the homies goodnight …..) sigh. it’s tough out here for stsg BUT i think they’d also be really endeared by it …… their oblivious lil reader….

AND WAHHHHH LIL BABY GUMI 🥺🥺🥺🥺 OLLIEEEE YOU’RE KILLING ME a nice house by the sea…….. taking walks by the beach…… and . mommy sugu ..,, our lord and saviour ……. makes u breakfast every morning and wakes u up by kissing u :(((( lets u cling to him while he cooks .. sighhhh. sigh sigh sigh. being a househusband could’ve fixed him idc 😔😔

Sugu being a caretaker mommy for one actual baby and one baby that’s actually a tall pouty bastard that’s so insufferably charming <//333 and you ofc!!! (His favourite baby) (joke he adores you all equally) (even if he lovingly pretends satoru is his least favourite)

AND THISSSS PLS u know the way to my heart….. caretaker mommy sugu 🥺🥺🥺 he would thrive off taking care of his babies like truly. he’s the Mother ever. and now he has one lil baby to Actually Mother and two overgrown babies to coddle and tease…… his dream life tbh. now i’m just imagining reader, toru & gumi waking sugu up on mother’s day to celebrate LMAOO they made a cake and everything….. he’s exasperated but secretly very touched :’3 maybe tears up a lil later when he’s looking at the world’s best mommy <3 cup u guys bought him LOL he’s such a sap …..

AND ARIIIII the merman sugu asks you’ve been getting have actually been making me laugh my ass off everytimeeeee 😭😭 sugu flopping around like a seal and hating all humans except reader is so fucking funny to me like he’s just straight up dissing the human race but just looks you dead in the eyes and says “but you’re one of the good ones” GOODBYEEEEE 💀💀💀

PHDJDJJD NO BECAUSE SAMEEEE i still have a couple more mer!sugu asks to get to actually… they’re all so great…… my anons have converted me fully into a mer!sugu stan and now i can’t stop thinking abt him 😭😭 HE’S SOOOO FUNNY U GET IT COMPLETELY LIKE …. he’s just a grumpy little seal man ……. ”you’re one of the good ones” NO BC LITERALLY!! THAT’S HOW HE FEELS…… reader is his emotional support human <33 he doesn’t like anyone else and WILL consider drowning anyone who gives them trouble but then reader gives him a Look and he’s like. sigh. 😒😒😒 you’re no fun. <-… he’s insane actually BUT WE LOVE HIM <33333 silly lil fishy !!

WAHHH URE SO SWEET OLLIE 😭😭🥺🥺 thank u for the flowers and sugu’s pancakes…….. i am munching on them gratefully…… here are some nice sunflowers 🌻🌻🌻 and croissants 🥐🥐🥐 for u <333 I’M DOING WELLL trying to catch up on asks + cooking up a lil sashisu/reader thingie.. 👀👀 i haven’t been able to post fics as regularly bc of uni but hopefully i can get it out by next weekend :33 and thennnn i think i’ll focus on mer!sugu…

ANYWAY WHAT ABT U ???? how have u been ?? tell me tell me 🎤🎤…… i hope it’s sunny wherever u are, here it’s still cold n gray T—T but spring will be with us soon … stay strong …….

[puffyducks]

DCRC Week #7

All right you guys buckle the fuck up cause it's time for absolute peak. Yeah that's right I'm talkin PKNA #4: Earthquake bitch!!! Which also happens to be the EXACT VOLUME THEY STOPPED PRINTING IN ENGLISH FOR, come on man we were so close 😭

(Long and image-heavy post heehoo)

Giant money symbol on the floor..... I wonder who this oil rig belongs to

Donald stop doing some kind of ritualistic sacrifice with your little cookie men and drink ur fuckin coffee. Also Unooo hiiii :3c

A tectonic emergency has occurred on the west coast and these two bitches are busy arguing like an old married couple GET IT TOGETHER!!!!

Raw asf introduction panel for Flagstarr

Do you guys think Everett Ducklair paid his taxes

Most logical you say? I'm sure that's not a trait that will come up later-

BRO IS JUST BAILING 😭

Lmfaooo I love framing Angus Fangus for federal crimes get rekt bozo (also really good looking panels hii Flagstarr hiiiii)

Donald being held at gunpoint like a week after the whole nuclear blast thing, he really can't catch a break can he?

Btw I am CHEWING on the colors in these pages. Who knew purple and green gradients could be so menacing?

Looove the background of this page being made up of the X-transformer.... mwah 👌

sorry

(Spam don't read this part) OK listen I know that losing the west coast is bad and all, but also like, do we really need California? I'm just saying like-

PK: "IF WE DON'T STOP THOSE EARTHQUAKE MACHINES IT'S GONNA UNEARTH A SUPERCONTINENT AND MILLIONS OF PEOPLE WILL DIE" Uno: "Uuuuh idk that actually sounds kinda dope haha. Like a new continent sounds sick as fuck. Maybe we should just let the entire western US die idk lol"

THEY'RE GETTING DIVOOOOORCED 💔💔💔

btw guys I'm getting a playlist set up for this issue send me song recs

let go of him PK

I mean WOAH who said that that's crazy. heroes don't kill people umm do the right thing... also we need him for the code I guess that's important too-

I was explaining the plot of this comic to a friend (one who knows literally nothing about the duckverse) and she was like "oh Fairfax's motivations sound exactly like Team Magma from Pokemon Ruby" and like... yeah... I GUESS

It doesn't help that his design lowkey looks like Maxie in ORAS- like if you squint really hard-

I don't have any riveting commentary here I just adore the entire way this page is set up

Raw asf line coming from Donald Fauntleroy Duck

Yeah it really DIDN'T work out. You're telling me he wanted to keep the keys apart and his master plan was to give the second key to the only other person on the plane with him? Just huck it in the ocean or something cmon Fairfax use that big brain of yours-

I said before in my last post but I just love this issue. I'm sure someone better at literary analysis could explain better than me, but the artwork, the COLORS, the story is all just sooo good and I'm putting it all in my MOUTH. I especially love the messaging between doing what's logical and doing what's right, cause at the end of the day morality is a subjective human trait, and who's to say that killing millions of people for the potential benefit of billions isn't a noble thing to do? Also a rare Uno L in this issue but he's LEARNING okay. He's just a little guy he's just a little hyperintelligent sentient building ok.... leaf him alone........

Btw in case you haven't noticed by now this issue also happens to be what the blog description of @duckblr-book-club is based on and no I'm not the one that wrote that. It is true though, the Pangea Project will be real in 24 hours if certain people don't catch up on reading these comics. SEE YOU NEXT WEEK FOR ODIN TIME!!!!!!

[onlyjaeyun]

thinking about the sb!universe so here are some scenes/headcannons i have:

• one day jay’s dad shows up to the office with shiah’s dad and shiah herself. jay’s dad drops that he believes it’s time to start the marriage process. shiah slips jay the ring she’s always wanted and tells her to make the proposal big and grand, and that they’ll act like it was all a surprise for the media. yn overhears and is devastated. my poor girly :( . that meeting is like 3,000 steps backward for jay and yn.

• yn showing up to flowers on her desk from the one guy she starts seeing from another dept. jay has someone send out a notice reminder that sending gifts with intent and dating amongst coworkers, even those in other departments is not recommended. he even asks giselle to investigate it as she works in HR, and she’s like uhmmm, ok?? giselle doesn’t take it seriously and snitches to yn. she’s like “GIRL UR MAN IS JEALOUSSSSS” 🤭🤭 when jay asks for a follow up a few days later giselle is like uhmmm…no response yet from my manager haha, we’re like super busy rn.

• the other boys of the seoul 4 and nayeon finding out yn is casually dating again and throwing random options at her in front of jay who can’t show jealous he is to prove a point.

ok enough of the jealousy, some cute stuff:

• yn and jay taking a weekend vacation when they get together and just being glued to each other all weekend. yn is so cuddly, especially after sex, which is new to jay. usually he keeps his distance in bed after his 3 rounds with miyeon or she leaves right away. he’s ready to go crazy when yn leaves the bathroom and comes back to the bed after being cleaned up and she just closes the distance between them (pee after sex so you don’t get a UTI girlies). his breath hitches in his throat and he knows he can stay like this forever.

• IK IK IK it’s too early in the smau to think about sb!yn and jay getting married and having children but i had to 😭 jay’s like in a serious emergency meeting after something goes wrong and his face is just stoic and he looks like he’s gonna kill someone in a few minutes. but then his 2 little children burst through the door after yn took her eyes off them for literally 30 seconds. they were supposed to wait outside of the meeting room to surprise him but their 4 year old daughter and 2 year old son don’t care. jay’s mood instantly changes when his children are suddenly jumping into his lap and gripping his arm with their little hands. he hasn’t seen them all week because of all the time he’s been spending in the office so he lets them stay. he gives him his pen and notebook to play with as they sit on his lap. yn opens the door a crack and makes silent eye contact with jay to say sorry, but he just silently assures her it’s fine and laughs at how one of the kids started drawing on his suit sleeve. when the meeting finishes he kisses their cheeks and thanks them for being so good during the meeting.

• yn and jay taking their first trip together and deciding to go shopping. jay buys everything for her and she’s like no no i didn’t even want it that much. he’s like baby u tried it on and stared at yourself in the mirror for 15 minutes smiling before u put it back. whenever yn needs something he just puts his black card in front of her and assures her that he has more than enough money for himself and that his princess deserves to be spoiled. and then yn fights him at the boba shop, insisting she’ll pay for this one thing 😭😭

a little nsfw hc for u too heehee

• sb!jay is probably obsessed with creampies, he loves to come in yn and watch it just drip out ooooh. if yn’s on bc, he’d go crazy 😭😭 when yn’s like yk i still have the chance of getting pregnant, jay’s just like well baby we’ll be parents then, i don’t mind. we love a man who accepts that pleasurable actions have their consequences.

this one for shits and giggles:

• jay learning about yn’s family and deciding enough is enough. he hires a hitman to get them 😍😍😍

i literally love all of these so so so much and am just super grateful to know you guys enjoy this as luch as i do. i'll absolutely use a few of ghese ideas as inspo and genuinely can't wait to indulge in most of them. ESPECIALL THE CREAMPIE ONE BC THATS SO HIM 👀👀👀 and pls involving the boys and nayeon when she does start dating again will make things so much better so you bet your ass i'll use that one 🤭🤭 thank you so much baby, your brain is so sexy i hope you have the best day ever and know i love and appreciate you so much 🥺🤍💖🧸