#we’re back to venting on main ig

[thinkingabout-girls]

i’m so fucking tired dude

[the-14th-ghost]

The Queen and Her Subject

Woooo boy am I excited to be writing this. Finally a fic I'm actually putting time into

Word count: 1,298 words TWs: Lovely-dovey gooey mushy stuff, kinda self-shipping ig? Also kinda OC x canon

And here’s what I imagine these characters would look like

But also the bendy in this would look like This (credit to the creator of this, it’s SO cute)

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I HIGHLY suggest listening to this before you read on, because one of the main characters and the main story of this prologue is VERY MUCH based off of this video. All credits I mentioned go to this creator on YouTube ⌄⌄

Now since that's out of the way, ENJOY THE SHOW!

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“M-My Queen? Are you all right?” A nervous wimpy voiced asked

“!!!” 

Jumping out of her skin, she is jolted awake. Already with adrenaline pumping through her body. Though as quick as a blink, poor Caz already has her hands up ready for any and all danger.

“W-Who are you? Where am I? What i-is this place?” She sputter with a twisted fear in her voice

“My Queen! I-It’s alright! You’re alright! Really, you’re ok.” 

Stopping dead in her tracks as if regaining her senses. She notices a few things off about this mysterious person helping her. 

1) He (or whatever it may be) called her a “Queen.” Why in the hell would it do that? 

2) The voice seems to be coming from…a bendy shaped figure? She notices stitches. Is it one of those many bendy dolls with a crooked smile? 

“W-Where…where am…where are we?” She questioned in low shaky breath

“...S-See for yourself” The wimpy bendy figure suggested. 

Doing as she was told, Caz begrudgingly gets off of the ground to soak in the atmosphere. At first, she notices they are on what appears to be an island with a door behind them. Surrounded by this…weird black stuff. The ink? 

With a tapping on her shoulder, the weird awkward alive bendy plush points another thing out. “Look…look at that” it asks with fear in its voice.

Caz then turns around, not knowing what to expect. What she sees makes her more confused than anything. A giant blocky machine with tubes and wires poking all around it. 

“Woah…what even is this place? Who are you?” Caz sternly asks the bendy doll. 

Without even giving it time to respond, Caz already starts to spew even more questions. Something about this small living bendy plush is weirding her out. And yet something about it seems familiar.

“What’swrongwithme?WhereamI?Whoareyou?Howareyoualive?Howdidthishappen?What’shappeningtome?”

With the freaked out tone and with her having a sudden panic attack, the nervous bendy doll tries to consult the paranoid newbie again.

“It’s alright! It’s alright! Your highness, please! It’s me.”

Who? How the hell is she meant to know who this stranger is if she can’t even remember how Caz herself got here. 

“You? I don’t know you! I don’t know anything that’s going on!” She vents out in feared rage. “I don’t even know how I got here…” the new freak-show murmured solemnly.

“Why, d-don’t you recognize me? I-It’s your loyal drone servant, Billy Bee. Well, I w-was a bee” He says as he looks back at his upside-down heart tipped tail as it whips around. Then it all clicks. Caz knew what this black stuff was and how she got here, “Oh, weren’t you that one-off character I one-off voiced in that one-off episode about bendy tryna steal honey? I was the….queen bee, right? Is that why you keep calling me royal names? You still must think I’m her. I really am not.”

Puzzled, Billy asks “Not h-her? Even if you…you aren’t, you’re still incredibly beautiful l-like her.” Finishing off with a giggle and his cheeks getting lighter. Or darker? Flushed or embarrassed.

“But how did…How are…How can I know you’re telling the truth.” 

“W-Well, I could never hurt you. Honestly, I w-would even dream of hurting you. Y-You my queen! I’ll never do that e-even if I wanted to.” He exclaimed passionately and happily.

“You seem…oddly cheerful despite the situation we’re in.”

Now with that pointed out, the color of the sides of his crooked smile deepen more in color. 

“B-Because I’m with you, m-my queen. Oh, your presence always…always calms me down.” Billy happily whimpered. 

With a huff, the supposed “queen” dusts herself off, ready to move forward. But just as she was about to look back at the moving bendy doll, she noticed yet another thing. Her arms. Then her torse. Then her clothes. 

Sharp dark golden bones seem to be protruding from her elbows out of the flesh of her forearms. Spider-like. Almost widow-like. It’s not causing her physical harm. But emotionally, her view on herself is almost completely shattered. 

“I’m…I’m…How did this happen?”

Then, the awkward bendy plush gently wraps its lanky tail around Caz’s ankle. Tugging away from the surrounding ink. With him being paranoid about something lurking in there.

“I really t-think we should…we should go, my queen”

“Wha- huh?!” Caz exclaims, almost like snapping out of a trace of anxiety. 

Billy couldn’t help but to be drop dead worried about his “queen’s” mindset. Question after question. Worry after worry. Almost as if she can’t let go.

“Wha- what are you talking about, Bills?! Don’t you see? I’m an inky monster! You’re an inky monster. We’re trapped down here!” She snapped. “I don’t know how to explain it but we’re trapped, what are we able to do?!” Caz couldn’t help but to yell. All of this, is getting to her head so quickly. There doesn’t seem to be any luck for them. The gods Joey was babbling about before this happened mustn't be on their side for now.

“I know, my queen. B-But…sometimes there’s only one thing to do. Press on”

.

.

.

With simply a defeated sigh. Caz has nothing left to do but to agree with the small “Billy” plush. Reluctantly though. Not too keen on exploring this horrible and disturbing place. Especially with the likelihood of easily getting lost with not knowing where to go. 

“...I guess we could try.”

Billy giggles happily. Glad his queen agreed with him after some persuasion. Adding a hop and a skip to his step, Billy the living bendy plush begins to flow the “queen” he so lovingly adores. But whilst turning to face the doorway, he caught something just out of the corner of his eye. 

“M-My queen…do you see that.”

Caz then snaps her head back, as quick as an owl. But she notices nothing out of the ordinary. Well, for this world at least. 

“No? What are you on about?”

“That.”

Caz tries to figure out where the nervous little Billy guy is alluding to. He seems to be worried about something about the giant machine almost a hundred feet away from the both of them. Everything is fine. But…the doorway in front of the large machine. On top it reads “GENT” Gent? Something about that word is scaringly familiar to her. Was it a union? A group? No it was a-

.

.

.

A cooperation

Gent cooperation

Shaking her head. Even just that word. Gent. Brings her chills. But it doesn’t go unnoticed. Though very tiny, Billy sees the fear form in Caz’s expression. But like clock work, almost instinctual. Billy scampers up Caz’s leg then arm up to her shoulder. Like a cat when its owner has a bag full of cat-nip. 

He kissed her cheek with a "Mwah" by pressing his tiny plush open mouth grin to her face. Similar to another person with yellow-ish felt. Despite the ink dripping from her eye and it getting onto Billy’s felt-like teeth, he doesn’t seem to mind. Only minding Caz’s state of mind. But not giving a word to the fact that her cheeks also darkened to a blush. Like a towel soaking up water. Getting darker.

“P-Please…don’t be afraid, my queen. I know it’s…it’s scary being h-here right now but, despite my new size I’ll try m-my best to protect you. I can…”

Billy then looks around, scanning the area to think of anything to cheer her up. Then he and his skinny tail spring up when he gets an idea. “I can be y-your second pair of eyes. I’ll stay r-right up here on your shoulder.”

His idea works out. Caz finally cracks out a smile because of him. She’s finally seen something, or someone, who’s willing to help her here. A feeling she’s been longing for all her life. 

“Th-Thanks, Billy. I haven't heard someone say that to me so genuinely in a long long time”

[idv-sunsxin3]

{Twisted Wonderland} Animatronic AU!

//Just Mod Sunshine having FNAF brainrots- don’t worry. And no, I don’t take feedbacks as I’m not the biggest FNAF enthusiast, this is just for fun~! uwu

Octavinelle Gang - Day shift

The establishment is a cafe for obvious reasons.

Azul is the leader and vocalist, he takes the right side of the stage and his instrument is an electric piano.

Jade takes the left side of the stage, and plays bass as main instrument.

Last but not least, Floyd takes the middle back spot of the stage and plays his role as the drummer.

Yes, newspaper saying the "Squeeze of 87" ig- *looks at Floyd*

Floyd is not only a drummer, but also an animatronic who is programmed to play with kids and give them lots of hugs and squeezes- So his surface material is squishy and soft to the touch- but you can still get strangled if he strengthens his grip-

The staff pretty much also found Azul’s behavior suspicious by how he frequently starts saying concerning lines to kids, like “don’t leave me” or “stay here forever”-

I feel like also adding my Octavinelle OC, Cath, into the animatronic gang as the souvenir shop employee bc why not-(feel free to drop yours since we’re short on staff and we want to bully the nightguard-/ih)

Octavinelle Gang - Night shift

Floyd is definitely the fastest of the trio, and definitely would approach you first at night 1 but sneakily(after all, eels don’t throw themselves very easily into unknown threats- they need to test the waters first~) along with Jade from the other door of the office.

The souvenir shop is pretty much a medium sized counter in a not a small nor a huge space on the corner- It lets you buy merch and collections with coin shells you earn from night shifts. During a night shift, you can buy a 15% battery for the office and even upgrade features to make your job easier(like baits, stunners, and spare detectors that help you know which door one of the trio will appear from.)

Instead of extra vents, there’s a hole with water covered by a metallic lid. It is located on the right corner of the office, right near your chair- which is where either one of the tweels can appear in their animatronic eel form at nights 4-7 through a water tub that connects with an outside aquarium of the cafe.

In front of the office desk, there’s a big, beautiful aquarium. But don’t get too distracted! If you squint harder, you can see specks of blood floating around the water near what’s behind one of the huge rocks from the aquarium; an arm-

You need to pull out your flashlight whenever the tweels appear inside it in their eel form.

Azul also has an animatronic octopus form, pretty creepy since parts of his face can actually open up or shift into inhumane angles. Azul usually would only expose his tentacles on the aquarium hole at night 5 then completely show his entire form if you insist to stay until nights 6-7.

At night 5, you’ll definitely have to avoid Azul’s tentacles from pulling your legs towards the hole and drown you- the struggling lasts for at least 5-10 seconds.

Voiceline ideas I got from my brainrotting-

Floyd

At night 1// HAHA- Who’s this new fry? Oh! A shrimpy! Helloooo!

At the right side door// “Hi hi! XD”

At the left side door// “Shrimpy! :D”

Appearing in the aquarium// *shows all his teeth as he leans near the glass, staring at your soul with a big grin- wait, bloody teeth are showing-*

At night 4// “…what do you think you’re doing…?” *makes a cursed look while staring at your soul through the camera*

At night 5// “Hey! I had a lot of fun for the past few days since you came! Would you come here more often? I promise I’ll be good to you,,,,! :D”

Game Over// “Why are you being mean to me, Shrimpy…?”

Game Over// “The tag game just started!”

Night shift completed// “Ahh?? Already over? I want Shrimpy to stay longer…!” *whiny noises*

Jade

At the left side door// “Fufu~”

At the right side door// “Over here, nightguard~”

Appearing in the aquarium// *shows you a mushroom with his happy, closed mouth smile in his eel form-*

At night 2// “Let’s spark things up a big, shall we, Floyd…~?”

At night 2// “Oya, aren’t you a fresh sight…? May I take a closer look, Mm? Please, open the door…~”

At night 4// “Mm? What’s the sudden behavior…? Though, Floyd will surely need a new friend to have here~”

At night 5// “Shhh, don’t struggle… You’re going to hurt yourself…~”

Game Over// “Aw, you’re tired already…~?”

Game Over// “Is alright, let me take care of you now…~”

Night shift completed// “Thank you for your good efforts today… May we do our best as well tomorrow~”

Azul

Wondering around the halls, heavy footsteps echoing can be heard from the office// Tra la la~

At night 3// “Ha… Let’s see what you’re actually made of…~”

At night 4// “Oh well, what do we have here? You came back to us, I’m so glad you’re here…~”

At night 5// “Everyday, dear friends like you tend to come and go, and never come back again… Will you do the same once everything’s over…?”

At night 5// “Please… Don’t go”

Pulling your legs with his metallic tentacles// “Stay… Stay with me forever.”

Game Over// “Your departure has been long-overdue since the beginning, my friend…”

Game Over// “I would give up many things for you… So let me hold you this time-“

Night shift completed// O-Oh..? It is time…? Ah, good work then… *sad tone while clapping slowly from the background*

X reader HCs because I love them so much-

The trio loves it when he gets the turn to get washed by you during maintenances or reparations- it feels like a massage session for them hhh

Jade loves to plant mushrooms in your locker as his annoying gesture of love-

Azul doesn’t directly admit it, but he likes to have his head laying and nuzzling on your lap whenever you sit- it pretty much helps him relax.

When Jade starts to feel deep affection for you, he would call you “Angelfish” as he lurks around the doors and when showing up at the aquarium.

Floyd likes to play with you, no matter how childish the games can be- just play hide and seek with him, oki…? owo

He loves to scare you when he appears from the aquarium hole with his eel form, but he loves it more when you pet him after doing so, he might stop scaring for a while if you do~

___

[jaekaicx]

you guys remember that one post i made abt an amphibia spidey au? well heres what ive got so far

(referenced amphibia spoilers, also ig spoilers? in case i actually make this a thing? which i doubt but who knows)

(edit: slightly outdated now)

(edit 2: even more outdated now, a good chunk of this has been changed)

semi-canon divergent where they dont get sent to amphibia, but all of the amphibia characters are human. also slightly aged up by a year or two

some sort of sashannarcy will happen i will make sure of it

these events take place over the course of a couple years, this doesnt happen all at once

marcy is an intern of dr. andrias “andy” leviathan, who is the head of some big science corporation. they met when marcy wandered away from the group on a school field trip and they hit it off well. dr andy made them his intern once they were old enough (age 15/16)

marcy still gets the news that theyre moving away, but this time he ends up running to dr. andy and venting to him.

on an unrelated note (/s), those moving plans end up falling through bc of a tragic accident w marcys parents (~ age 14)

marcy gets taken in by dr andrias (by this point ally has moved out and is in college. she wouldve took marcy in but she couldnt afford it at the time :(). they bond a lot more and andrias basically becomes marcy's main father figure

flash forward a bit, where marcy is helping dr andrias out with a project involving messing around with spider genetics and stuff like that. thing is, marcys still clumsy as hell, and he accidentally releases a bunch of the spiders. they try to contain them all but one of them sneaks out in marcys jacket (~ age 16)

it eventually makes its way to anne and bites her, and them boom, spider anne (~16/17)

she goes to sprig and polly for help (smth in her says not to go to marcy…) and they help her out with suit designing. theres a bunch of failed trial runs and they actually get help from ally and jess at one point (anonymously) and soon enough annes on her way to being a full fledged spider person

cut back to marcy, who’s been hearing news abt some spider-person vigilante or whatever and freaking out bc hOLY SHIT WE HAVE A LOCAL SUPER HERO?!?!??!! coincidentally, he finds out that his grip is rly strong? and their vision just got ten times better? and wait a minute i haVE FANGS?!?!?! and they figure out holy shit i have spider powers too?!?!?

so marcy quickly gets to work making their own spider gear. he decides not to tell anyone despite his excitement, and they dont rly need to tell anyone bc hes got all the resources to make a suit (dr andy’s lab) and the knowledge.

the two spideys end up running into each other a lot on patrol (which may or may not have been orchestrated by marcy). theres a bit of animosity at first but eventually they decide to team up whenever theyre together. however they decide not to tell each other their identities

i have not watched miraculous lady bug but based on what ive heard anne n marce have a similar dynamic. neither of them know the other is a spidey, so theres a ton of dancing around each other bc of it. also theyre gay so yeah

meanwhile andrias is observing from a far watching his experiments play out. turns out marcys powers DIDNT come from a spider bite. nah, andrias had been secretly experimenting on them, combining their dna with spider dna. kinda like a spider man 2099 type thing but not rly bc i dont actually know his lore

he’d been prepping marcy to become the ideal host for the symbiote hes been harboring. it claims to be the best of the best sent by their people to check out other worlds, and decided to have andrias work for it. (havent decided whether to call it the night or the core yet)

they work together bc andrias has access to a bunch of resources bc yk hes some big science ceo guy type thing. the symbiote doesnt just want some normal human bc we’re boring and squishy. so it has andrias do research on gene splicing and combining the dna of humans and various other species. which means that theres more than just radioactive spiders in andrias’s labs

andrias probably goes through some arc abt wanting to be the host for the symbiote but it doesnt want him. still not quite sure yet, but he goes through some villain phase that’s a combo of a bunch of spidey’s villains (lizard/doc oc/green goblin/etc) and he goes on a rampage after being denied by the symbiote. he almost gets captured and defeated by the spideys but hes slippery so he escapes

eventually they capture marcy and put the symbiote in him (he goes missing for a while bc they got stuck in the pickle jar). shit goes down w host marcy going on a rampage and anne trying to stop them and her maybe finding out abt marcys identity but i havent gotten there yet shhh

theres probably a whole arc with marcy running off and dealing with the symbiote, but eventually they work out some sort of arrangement and marcy gets back most control over himself

no i did not forget abt sasha, shes just not as fleshed out as the others

her parents are the heads of a sort of rival company to andrias’s and theyre kind of assholes. like theres a lot to them theyre not terrible parents to sasha exactly but theyre def not good people and they treat their workers like shit

sashas actually super good with tech in this au btw, and at some point she finds out abt some super secret project her parents are working on thats rly horrible and needs to be stopped. he tries undoing it from the inside at first but it fails horribly and gets her in huge trouble with his parents. (~16/17)

she ends up running off and finding this gang that agrees to let her join and take down the corporation. sasha becomes a leader-type figure among them, plus she helps out with creating weapons

eventually he tries recruiting anne into her cause, not knowing that shes one of the spideys and doesnt rly condone their cause (neither wanna get marcy involved). the two have some whole arc kinda like the miles morales ps5 game. HOWEVER unlike the game sash lives but like barely. he spends a long time in the hospital and maybe also serves jail time im not sure yet

this all happens a bit before host marcy is a thing, or maybe while marcys missing in the pickle jar.

she eventually becomes a vigilante type figure and teams up with the spideys sometimes. the authorities know abt sashas identity but he doesnt let them catch her

also heres some extra notes

anne (she/her):

inspo: “classic” spider-man type deal with a bit of miles morales

general spider powers: wall climbing, heightened senses + reflexes + agility, spider sense, super healing, super strength

extras: miles-type venom blast (kinda like her calamity powers in a sense); has spinnerets in wrists so she can make her own webs; more “power” based fighting style

mainly relies on polly (and ally & jess sometimes) for help with gadgets and stuff like that. polly’s a smart kid

hop pop almost dies on her watch, and it becomes her “great power great responsibility” moment

practices her quips with sprig.

marcy (they/he):

inspo: spider-man 2099 and mcu-ish spider-man ?? plus venom spider-man from the trilogy but he never got it out

general spider powers (see above) with some exceptions

Does not have spider sense. or at least it seems like but its just rly weak. also cannot make his own webs, so he made web shooters

slightly higher resilience/healing ablities

extras: miles-type camouflage/invisibility powers; FANGS THEY HAVE FANGS and they can inject a paralyzing non toxic venom :3; has super vision, but in the sense that its very heightened and they can see a LOT better than a normal human. so like night vision, and they can see a lot farther than normal (makes up for the spider sense sort of); more “gadget” based fighting style

(debating this) can communicate telepathically with others, acts as some form of an extension of their spider sense

had to wear sunglasses a lot once the heightened vision started kicking in bc they were rly sensitive to light

while the fangs were rly cool at first, they actually make it kinda hard for marcy to talk normally and theyre hard to hide. he tries wearing a face mask for a bit but they still struggle speaking normally at times

sasha (she/he):

inspo: phin mason (miles morales ps5) plus a bit of harry osborn(?)

no “powers” powers, but is an amazing strategist, pretty strong (by “normal” standards), and great w tech

dont wanna say her smarts are quite on marcys level, but shes up there. in school tho she barely puts effort into the work. also, tech/engineering is the main field he’s good in, everything else (language arts, history, etc) shes just around average

p much the same types of gadgets as the tinkerer in mm ps5, programmable matter gear (computerized nanomaterial that can reform into a bunch of different weapons)

im honestly not sure yet abt sash i’ll probably change stuff abt her soon. tho i rly liked the thought of her wielding smth like the tinkerer’s sword

[crystalessenceswrites]

Burden of the Survivors- Chapter Two

Burden of the Survivors

Pairing: Din Djarin x fem!reader Rating: T (at the moment- subject to change) Warnings: swearing, canon-typical violence *no spoilers- takes place in Season 1 timeline* Summary: Mando works alone- except for when the absolutely can’t. There are few people Din trusts – trusts as in he doesn’t expect a viroblade in the back the second he’s turned around. She’s one of them. Just as cautious and nearly as tight lipped about her past as he is, Din doesn’t mind her around too much. A/N: My inspiration is a fickle thing, I’ve been swinging back and forth between Shadows and BotS for a few weeks now. Finally got enough to sit down and finish this chapter, so cheers to that.

[Masterlist] [Chapter One] [Chapter Two] [Chapter Three] Cross-posted to AO3

Chapter Two

When Vero found you, you were nothing but a pickpocket on the lower-level streets of Coruscant-the byproduct of the horrors of the Clone Wars and the rise of the Empire. You were nearing sixteen and beginning to lose your touch. When you were younger-and smaller-it was easier to weave through crowds and avoid attention. Puberty and a growth spurt made it much more difficult for the teenage you to blend in. You made it work, you had to if you wanted to get by, but it took twice as much work to get folks to look the other way. Ever observant Vero caught on quick but said you had potential, just not as a street thief. The alabaster skinned theelin approached you with a job, a job that paid more than you could scrounge up in two weeks selling your stolen treasures. All you had to do was deliver a small parcel to a pilot friend of his at a docking station a few levels up without getting caught by the city guard before the pilot was scheduled to leave in two hours. It seemed easy enough and you desperately needed the credits. The last thing on your mind was what was in the package you carried. You knew better than to stick your nose where it did not belong, especially when you were getting paid. That decision changed your life.

The job was a test to see if you were capable and trustworthy enough to bring on for a real job as a runner, and you passed with flying colors. Vero took you under his wing and had you running smuggled goods and other products all over Coruscant. It was a reckless job, you knew that-even as a child-but it kept a roof over your head and food in your belly at a time in your life when you had forgotten what that was like. You were one of many street kids on Coruscant that had to turn to life in the underworld to get by, but you thank the Maker you ended up with the one crew on Coruscant that had some small sense of morals.

Vero worked for Shan Tillis, who had grown up on the streets of Corellia himself. Shan was sympathetic, smuggling had been his way out of the gutter, and he offered you that same opportunity. It had not taken long for Shan and the others to realize you were too smart and too quick on your feet to just move goods, that you and your brain could be used elsewhere. So, they taught you. Kom and Redarr, Shan’s lead muscle heads, taught you how to fight and how to fight dirty. Sola bought you your first proper viroblade (you’d nicked one years ago but it was made for hands much larger than yours so you’d always been rather clumsy with it) and taught you every trick in the book she knew, every weak spot on the body, how to wound but not kill and where to bleed someone out the fastest. Her lessons were always your favorite. Tala taught you how to pilot every kind of ship you could get your hands on, and how to hotwire a landspeeder- Vero was not thrilled when he discovered that lesson had been performed on his precious baby.

Everything that made you into the infamous bounty hunter you were now had been taught to you by that crew. Every cautious tick had been drilled into you by Kom and Vero. Redarr had schooled you on blasters, made you practice in-between jobs on how to take them apart and put them back together with your eyes closed. Zena taught you how to read people and how to know when a deal was about to go south.

Shan imparted you with the most practical wisdom of them all. How to know when you’re fucked.

This job seems pretty fucked to you.

The Mandalorian is silent as the two of you settle on the ridge above the compound. Scope out, he looks over the cluster of buildings. Even from a distance you’ve already counted ten nikto out and about, and you can safely assume they’re all heavily armed.

You tighten the various straps and holsters on your person before slipping your tactical mask into place. The contraption covers the lower half of your face and has always been more for the intimidation factor than much else. Redarr had gifted it to you all those years ago as more of joke than practical gear but you’d grown attached. Between the mask and its voice modulator, your hood and dark, nondescript clothes you could remained relatively anonymous when you wanted to, which was most of the time.

“If we come along the east side I think I can make it up to the roof without being seen, provide you with a little more cover.” You did always prefer the higher ground.

Mando nods, continuing to scan the scene, “there’s two on the northwest corner you’ll have to manage.”

Your scoff crackles through the modulator, “they won’t be an issue.”

He grunts before his head snaps back towards the edge of the compound, “shit. Bounty droid.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” You whip out your own scope, focusing in on where Mando was watching. Sure enough, you spot an IG unit bounty droid making its way up to the group of nikto lingering outside.

“Subparagraph 16 of the Bondsman Guild Protocol Waiver compels you to immediately produce said asset.”

You roll your eyes as the shooting starts. Droids had to have figured out by now it was never that easy. If it was, anyone with a blaster could join the guild.

The droid has a handle on the gunfight, but you groan as you watch the compound go into lockdown, all the blast doors slam shut before the last shot is fired.

“Droids.” Mando snaps as he stands, one hand clenched around the hilt of a blaster.

You jump up, following behind him. Again, with the acting first, thinking second.

As you approach the encampment Mando jerks his head up, “you take the topside.”

“Gladly.”

You scramble up the side of the building with relative ease, there are plenty of odd pipes and vents that make convenient grips as you haul yourself and up over the lip of the roof. When the droid had ruined any chance at a surprise attack, you’d lost sight of the two guards on the roof. You keep your rifle aimed in their last known direction as you settle onto your stomach, ready to cover Mando as needed.

“Subparagraph 16 of the Bondsman Guild Protocol Waiver compels you to immediately produce said asset,” the droid repeats.

Maker they really have no learning curve.

“IG unit! Stand down!”

The bounty droid has split second reaction times, shooting at what you can safely assume is Mando when he groans from somewhere down below and out of view. “We’re in the Guild!”

“So I suggest you stand down before you take a bolt to the brains, droid.”

Your quip draws the droid’s attention to your vantage point on the roof.

“You are Guild members? I thought I was the only one on assignment.”

“That makes two of us,” Mando grumbles. “So much for the element of surprise.”

That was a kriffing understatement.

“Sadly, I must ask for your fob. I have already issued the writ of seizure. The bounty is mine.”

“Unless I’m mistaken, you are, as of yet, empty-handed.”

“This is true.”

You have to restrain your eye rolling to keep monitoring the roofline.

“I have a suggestion.”

“Proceed.”

“We split the reward.”

How many people was he going to offer to share your credits with? This was beginning to get out of hand.

“This is acceptable.”

Well considering how much Mando hated droid he at least knew how to manage them considerably well.

“Great. Now let’s regroup, out of harm’s way, and form a plan.”

You were sorely doubting that the droid was capable of forming a decent plan or following whatever you and Mando came up with, but it was worth a shot considering the situation had become even more fucked thanks to him.

“I will of course receive the reputation merits associated with the mission.”

“Is this really the time?” You shout down at the pair.

Mando seems to have the same idea, “can we talk about this later?”

“I require an answer if I am to proceed-”

An orange head pops into view on the roof across from you, “we’ve got company!”

The nikto takes a shot at the droid, “oh, no. Alert. Alert. Alert.”

Whole lot of help this one was. You land a headshot just as the doors of the compound slide open, more soldiers swarming out, blasters drawn.

“Let’s go!” Mando dives for cover and the droid follows after.

Your spot affords you a decent line of sight into the courtyard but there’s more of them then you thought there would be out in the middle of nowhere guarding who knows what you were after. It takes you picking off three of them before they realize you’re shooting at them from above. There’s a flurry of shouting and pointing in your direction and Mando makes a run for the main set of blast doors at the back of the courtyard. You were going to have friends on the roof soon. Lucky you.

Rolling back you jump to your feet, taking a couple pot shots into the courtyard as you make for the far end of the roof. The droid is a decent shot, covering Mando’s mad dash while you focus on the nikto popping up across the roof. One hauls himself over the edge to your left, making a swipe at yours leg with his blaster. The loud crunch of your boot to his skull cuts through the blaster fire around you as the body falls into courtyard. Gross. Two more appear out of thin air, their shots barely missing your head. Losing your blaster you duck and roll, knocking both over as you draw a viroblade from your thigh holster. Neither have time to react before you’re on them, each taking one clean slice to the neck.

Mando and the IG unit have made it to the main door as you duck behind some ventilation equipment at the northwest corner of the building. You appear to have control of the roof for now, but you can see the soldiers in the courtyard beginning to regroup. They have Mando and the bounty droid pinned. Shit. You can hear Mando’s modulated shouts from below but you can’t quite make out what he’s going on about. Hopefully he’s chewing out the dumbass droid who go you into this mess.

The IG unit steps out again, laying out a spread of blaster fire that doesn’t seem to do much. The nikto have plenty of coverage behind debris and the series of pillars lining the courtyard. Their numbers also seem to be steadily growing. Just how many of them were set up out here? Who needed this many bodyguards? It was nearly a small army. The IG unit cannot keep up with the incoming blaster fire, even with your help from above.

Your stomach drops as you catch sight of another incoming nikto on a hover blaster at the encampment entrance. You were all fucked. All you can do is hope Mando’s found good cover down there as you drop to your stomach, bracing behind the ventilation unit. The nikto lets it rip, covering the area with a spray of bolts. Most sound like they’re striking below you, focused on where you assume Mando and the droid are hiding.

Then as suddenly as it started the gun stops. Poking your head out you watch as the nikto is flung backwards and Mando yanks the blaster to him. You thank the Maker for whatever good fortune he earned for that to work. It takes only moments for Mando to swing the blaster around and mow down the rest of the small army.

“Well done,” the IG unit cuts through the eerie silence following the blaster fire. “I will disengage self-destruct initiative.”

“Wait, you guys can self-destruct?” Seemed a bit counterintuitive.

Mando’s visor snaps to where you’re hanging over the edge of the roof, looking for a spot to climb down. He wordlessly offers you a hand and you toss your pack and blaster down to him. Its not too high up so you simply ease over the edge and drop to the ground, ignoring the harsh jolt to your knees.

“Manufactures protocol dictates I cannot be captured; thus I have a self-destruct initiative.”

So the droid could have killed you all if had deemed the situation too risky. Great. You’re glad you hadn’t been aware of that during the shootout.

Mando helps the droid back to its feet. “You know, you’re not so bad. For a droid.”

Had hell frozen over? Mando was as droid adverse as they got, and now he was complimenting one? The universe must be ending.

“Agreed.”

“That blaster hit looks nasty. You okay?”

“Running a quick diagnostic… it has missed my central wiring harness.”

“Is that good?”

“Yes.”

Mando glances back to you, “good?”

“Never better,” you grin. This could have gone significantly worse, so you had no room to complain at the moment.

“Well, now we just need to get the door open.”

The way Mando’s helmet whips back to the large blaster makes you groan. There were easier, less messy ways to go about things. You don’t attempt to talk the hunter out of it, he most likely wouldn’t listen to you anyways. It almost looks like he has fun shooting out the blast door until in collapses inwards.

You all take tentative steps inside the compound. One head appears around a far corner to the right. Mando’s quick draw has him downed before anyone blinks. “Anyone else?”

As if any survivors were going to offer themselves up to be shot.

“I’ll clear the west side,” you offer and Mando nods before heading off with the bounty droid in the opposite direction.

An unnerving silence settles over you as you stalk down the halls of the mysterious compound. The small army camped here had been prepared and well supplied. There are crates upon crates of food stuffs, weapons and ammunition. Some places are nearly packed floor to ceiling with it. What exactly was going on out here? How did they get all this out here in the middle of nowhere?

You worry your necklace pendant with one hand, an unconscious gesture you have yet to train yourself out of. Something was not right about this job, or at least more than normal. Over the years your own morals had morphed to accommodate your line of work. You worked for the guild and were often paid by unsavory individuals, but that was what you did to survive, and you refused to let that get to you. This however was picking at an old wound, long forgotten.

Another shot echoes through the compound and you find yourself racing back towards Mando and the droid, blaster held at the ready. Swinging around a corner you find Mando standing over a small floating pod, the bounty droid smoking out of its “head” on the floor. Maybe he didn’t want to split the bounty after all.

“Mando?” Your voice seems to cut through whatever trance the hunter was under, head snapping back towards you. “What happened?”

His shoulders drop, the tension seeming to fall away at your appearance. “He was going to kill the bounty.”

“I thought you said the client specified they wanted it alive if at all possible.”

Mando nods, “they did say that.”

That gnawing sense of dreads returns. Stepping up next to Mando you glance down into the pod-which appears to be functioning as some kind of traveling pram-and are greeted with wide dark eyes and pointy green ears.

Oh Maker no…

[raiseyourcups]

Cabur

Chapter Twenty-Two

Pairing: Din Djarin x OFC (Aili Verdella) Warnings: blood, injury, fire, cursing, the usual suspects being awkward and argumentative Word Count: 6k (it's a long one today) Also on AO3 

Masterlist//Main Masterlist

Summary: Mando is dying and there's only so much Aili can do without convincing him to remove his helmet. Not to mention the Storm Troopers and Moff Gideon still breathing down their necks. IG-11 just needs to hurry up and get the vent into the sewers open. 

Aili cursed quietly as she all but emptied out the entire contents of her med bag. She was not going to be able to get annoyed with Mando being out of charges now because somehow she hadn’t brought any bacta spray with her. She knew that Cara only had bacta patches and not many since she had used at least one on Karga the night before. 

“I’m not gonna make it. You need to go,” Mando said, his breathing a little labored as he tried to speak through the pain.  

“Shut up, you’re gonna be fine,” Aili replied quickly, bringing her hand back up to try to feel exactly where Mando’s wound was. She tried to hold back another curse when she realized that it had to be inside the helmet, further than she could reach without removing it. "You are not dying here."

"I am,” Mando said, wincing in pain behind his helmet. He was glad she couldn’t see his face or the blood covering it now. He knew she wouldn’t be able to heal him while he still wore the helmet and removing it wasn’t an option. As much as he wanted to, he couldn’t. Not if surviving meant he would be turning his back on the only life he had known since he was a child. 

"No, you are not dying on a dirty cantina floor, just let me take off the helmet so we can fix your stupid head." Aili went to lift the helmet when Mando grabbed her by the wrists as tightly as he could while in pain. She let out an annoyed growl but let him lower her hands anyway. She wouldn’t do that without his permission but she didn’t want him to die either. 

“No, leave me. Make sure Little Green is safe.” Mando hoped that using the nickname Aili had given the kid would make her take pause. 

“He’ll be fine because we’ll both be there to protect him,” Aili reasoned with him. He was just being dramatic like when he asked for her to give cover fire rather than use her numerous skills to help take down the troopers outside. 

“No, you need to go,” Mando said, having to pause a few times despite the short sentence. He had yet to let go of Aili's wrists but he was simply holding them now. She hadn’t even tried to pull them away for once which was a surprise to him. 

“Bantha shit, I’m not leaving you here because you’re not dying.” Aili didn’t know how many more times she needed to say it for it to get through his thick head. Obviously it wasn’t clicking for him but she was going to blame the blood loss and probable concussion for now. 

Mando let go of one of her wrists to pull something from around his neck off, handing it to Aili. She was surprised to see it almost matched the medallion that the Armorer had given her all those months ago. “When you get to the Covert, you show them that...tell them it’s from Din Djarin and that the foundling was in our protection, the Armorer and o-your ade will vouch for you.”

“You tell them yourself,” Aili said stubbornly. If she had to drag him down into the Covert herself. She knew Cara would help if she asked. She missed the way he tripped over his words figuring that the blood loss was finally getting to him. If he passed out that would make it easier for them to drag him along with them once IG-11 got the vent open. 

“Aili…I--”

Whatever he was going to say was cut off by a blast of fire coming from the window that the troopers had shot open. Aili threw herself over Mando to cover him from the flames. So much for her not caring. She really hated Incinerator Troopers and she wasn’t sure why she was surprised Moff Gideon had one with him. When the burst of flame went away, she pushed herself back up. Mando let out a pained groan as Aili glanced around to make sure Little Green was okay as well. 

She let out a quiet sigh of relief when she saw him standing there, near Cara and Karga, perfectly fine even as he kept looking at them with his wide brown eyes. She looked over to the IG unit who was still working on the vent. “Get that vent open! Now!” She shouted, her voice steady for the most part. If there was a slight wobble near the end, Mando wasn't about to comment on it. 

“You protect the kid, I can hold them back long enough for you to escape.”

“Now I know you’re brain damaged,” Aili shot back quickly. “I am not leaving you here.”

Mando let out a sigh that was barely audible. “Let me have a warrior’s death and take care of the kid, for the both of us.” 

“I. Am not. Leaving you here,” Aili repeated herself, glaring down at Mando now. 

“This is the Way.”

“Well it’s not my way,” Aili said shortly. She ignored the small part of herself that told her she had left behind people hurt way less in the interest of staying alive. She hadn’t cared back then, had only cared about finishing the missions she was sent on. There was another short burst of fire, Aili ducking over Mando to cover him again and when she looked up, she wished she hadn’t. 

The Incinerator Trooper walked into the cantina, quickly scanning the room for them. As soon as they were in his sight, he lifted his flamethrower up again aiming it straight at them all. From this close, nothing would stop the flames from hitting any of them. Aili looked over at Little Green in a panic when she saw him standing right in the line of fire. She tried to reach over Mando to pull Little Green towards them but she couldn’t reach him without leaving Mando’s side. 

As the flames shot forward, everyone ducked down so they wouldn’t have to see it coming. When all Aili felt was the heat but not the flames on her skin, she looked back up in confusion. Mando brought his own head up as much as he could, gritting his teeth in pain as he did. 

Little Green was using whatever powers he had to hold back the flames and they all stared as it looked like the fire hit a wall. He threw his little hand back and the fire flew back towards the trooper, throwing him out of the cantina with a surprised scream that was cut short as the flames overtook him. As Little Green fell back, cooing as his eyes closed, IG-11 finally got the vent open. Aili left Mando’s side long enough to scoop Little Green into her arms and away from the fire now spreading throughout the cantina.

“Come on, it’s open!” Karga shouted towards them. He didn’t want to spend another second in the cantina as it started to burn. He also didn’t want to wait for any more Troopers to get inside. 

“Go,” Mando said, his voice rougher than before. He took as good a look as he could from where he was laying at Aili and the kid in her arms. “You need to go.”

“I...we can’t just leave you here,” Aili still tried to argue. Mando was shocked that she was still trying to argue when they both knew he was dying. There wasn’t anything she could do for him and now that the kid was knocked out, neither could he with his strange powers. 

“Cara,” Mando called out as best as he could to the Shock Trooper. When Cara looked over at them he tilted his helmet towards Aili. “Take her.”

Despite the fact that she knew Aili would be pissed at her, Cara did as Mando asked and dragged the smaller woman up off of the floor being careful when she saw the kid in her arms. As expected, Aili fought against Cara’s hold even as she was getting all but carried over to the open vent. 

“Let me go,” Aili wrenched herself out of Cara’s grasp, giving the woman a glare before she turned it to where Mando was still laying. She couldn’t believe he would...actually yes she could believe that he would have Cara try to drag her out of there without him. She did not spend months of her life on that piece of crap ship, away from her girls, just for him to decide to die from an easy to fix wound. 

“I will stay with the Mandalorian, you protect the Child,” IG-11 said as it walked over to them. Of all the humans gathered there, the IG unit knew that the one currently holding the Child would be its best protector. Even with her emotions clouding her judgement at the moment. 

Aili paused for a long moment, looking down at Mando before she finally looked up at IG-11 with a dark look in her eyes. “You better bring him or I’ll shoot you myself and no one will be able to fix you this time.”

“Understood,” IG-11 said, holding out the bag that the Child had been in when the Scout Troopers had taken him. Aili took the bag, placing the sleeping child inside before she looked back down at Mando with an unreadable expression on her face. 

“Stay alive.”

Without waiting for Mando to reply, she turned to go down the vent, Cara following after her to make sure she didn’t try to head back when no one was looking. As soon as they were all in the sewers, Aili took the lead in front of Karga. It wouldn’t take them long to get to the Covert from the cantina if she remembered correctly. She just hoped she didn’t get turned around since she had never come in from the actual entrance aside from the very first time. 

“You know where we’re going?” Cara questioned, shock on her face. She had been sure that they were going to be stuck wandering around the sewers for at least a few minutes before getting their bearings. Unless Mando had been able to give Aili directions in between arguing with her about him staying behind. Somehow Cara doubted that was the case though. 

“Yeah, might take a while longer though, I never came in from the cantina,” Aili said flippantly. She didn’t elaborate any further than that despite the looks she was now getting from Cara and Karga. They didn’t need to know how or why she knew the way to the Covert. 

“You are still full of surprises,” Cara commented. Everytime she thought she knew even half of the things about Aili, the smaller woman went and purposely made herself more mysterious. This was actually more shocking to Cara than when she figured out that Mando and Aili had finally slept together, them not actually being together was less of a surprise. 

“You have no idea.”

They continued down the tunnels in mostly silence, Little Green had woken up at some point. He still let out tired coos which Aili couldn’t fault him for given how much energy he must have used to hold back the flames. They were getting closer to a part of the Covert that Aili recognized, close to where she usually snuck in from to be exact when there was a muffled explosion. 

Everyone turned around, ready to start shooting again if they had to. There was a bright light coming their way paired with steady footsteps. Aili tilted her head trying to figure out if she was only hearing one set or two sets of footsteps. She hoped that the droid had been smart enough to stay behind in the cantina if Mando didn’t make it. 

The relief she felt when she saw Mando and IG-11 come around the corner was short-lived as it was quickly replaced by her earlier anger with the Mandalorian. She let Cara move to help Mando stand, it wasn’t like she’d be very helpful anyway with her lack of height. Besides she was still carrying Little Green and she wasn’t nearly as upset with him as she was Mando. 

“Do you know which way to go?” Karga asked Mando when they came to what seemed like a fork in the road. 

“No, I don’t know these tunnels. I only ever entered from the bazaar,” Mando said, looking from left to right, unsure exactly where they were but he knew they couldn’t stop moving. It wouldn’t take long for Moff Gideon to realize where they had gone and send Troopers down into the tunnels after them. 

“It’s this way,” Aili said, nodding her head towards the right tunnel.

“Are you sure?” Mando asked, not because he doubted her answer but he still wasn’t even sure where they were. 

Aili looked over at Mando with a single raised eyebrow. “It’s not like I could use the front entrance any of the times I came down here.”

“Wait, what?” Cara asked, almost missing a step forward. “Exactly how many times have you been down here?”

“Every time I finished a job, it’s not that big of a deal.”

“But why come down here when you’re not--”

“Look, this isn’t the time or the place and no offense but I’m not gonna be giving answers anyway,” Aili interrupted before Cara could finish her sentence. 

Silence fell over them for a moment before Karga spoke, choosing to pick a different subject. “If we get the smell of sulfur and follow it, it’ll lead us up to the plains where the river flows.”

“And the Imps will catch us before we make it to the ship. We need the Mandalorians to escort us to safety,”

“And we need to warn them about the Imps heading their way,” Aili added without mentioning why warning them was needed. The existence of all of the other foundlings was something that could and would stay between her and Mando unless Cara and Karga saw them with their own eyes. She knew that if they did, they’d agree with keeping children out of the line of fire. 

They turned down another tunnel that Aili pointed out and she could tell that at least two of them were doubting her directions. She couldn’t blame them, it wasn’t exactly easy trying to keep all the tunnels straight. 

“This place is a maze!” Cara exclaimed. 

“We’re going the right way,” Aili said although now she was beginning to doubt herself a little. She had come through from so many different ways to avoid any Mandalorians on guard that they were all blending together in her head. 

“Stop,” Mando suddenly said, pulling away from Cara and Karga. “I can stand.”

“The bacta infusion is working,” IG-11 said and Aili slowly turned around to stare straight into Mando’s t-visor. So he let the droid remove his helmet after all? Even as she narrowed her eyes at him she had to admit that it made sense, no living thing could see his face and droids were technically not alive. Loopholes. Something they had clearly utilized after the disaster of a prison break. She shook the thought away, it was not the time or place to think about that. 

“I’ll try to find tracks,” Mando said, looking at the ground for a moment before pointing down the tunnel. “We’re close.”

“Yeah, I could have told you that,” Aili said, pursing her lips in annoyance. But she kept her mouth shut and let Mando take the lead now since it would be faster for him to follow the tracks with his helmet. She followed right behind him, Cara and Karga behind her, and IG-11 in the rear. 

“Turn here.” 

He led them into what Aili would assume was the main hallway which she had never actually seen before. She had always taken a different way, one that came out closer to the Armorer in order to not be seen by anyone else. Mando suddenly stopped in his tracks, shutting off his flashlight, and spun around to face them, specifically looking down at Aili. The way he was standing blocked her view of whatever was behind him. 

“What?” She raised an eyebrow wondering what he had seen. It couldn’t have been a dead end or anything like that. And it was quiet behind him so it wasn’t another Mandalorian.

“Wrong way,” Mando said shortly. 

“No, it’s not,” Aili stated, narrowing her eyes up at Mando. She may have never been this way but it was obviously the right way for someone who unlike her was a Mandalorian. She tilted her head and quicker than he could attempt to stop her, she ducked under his arms and stopped in her tracks when she saw what he was trying to hide from her. 

“Aili, no--”

“Oh.”

Aili slapped a hand over her mouth before she could say anything else, her eyes wide at the pile of armor before her. She knew she had missed Madsin’s birthday, had missed her swearing the Creed, which meant her armor could be in that pile and she would have no way of knowing. Meaning that would have left the other three without Aili and their big sister. Shaeli and Jaesa were still so young and Sula...she still looked to Aili and Madsin for answers sometimes.

She couldn’t do anything other than watch as Mando slowly moved forward to kneel down in front of the pile. He picked up one of the helmets and she wondered if he remembered who it had belonged to. A stupid thought considering how close knit the Covert was, Aili recalled learning several names that she would never be able to put a face or helmet to but Shaeli and Jaesa were hard to settle down when they shared stories of the Covert. Little Green let out a sad coo when Aili unconsciously tightened her grip on the bag he was in, holding him closer against herself. 

“We should keep moving,” Cara said quietly. She could understand why Mando was upset but Aili’s reaction was once again a surprise. It wasn't like she had ever mentioned knowing any other Mandalorians. But the smaller woman still had secrets that Cara didn’t know about since she hadn’t spent months on a ship with her. Mando had obviously been trying to keep Aili from seeing the armor for a reason though. 

“You go. Take the ship. I can’t leave it this way,” Mando said in a clipped tone. 

“Did you know about this?” Aili suddenly spun around to stare at Karga. He was the only one who could have called for an attack like this. Could have done it as soon as the Razor Crest took off all those months ago. She was so stupid, she should have fought harder to have the Armorer give her permission to help evacuate the foundlings immediately. She should have been there for...she should have known...

“No! When you two left the system and took the prize, the fighting ended and the hunters just melted away. You both know how it is. They’re mercenaries, they’re not zealots!” Karga exclaimed and Aili was ready to argue with him when Mando beat her to it. 

“Did you do this? Did you?” Mando got up quickly, getting into Karga’s face and shouting despite his voice still being rough and shaky from the still ebbing pain in both his head and body. It was taking most of his willpower to stay standing upright but now his grief and anger was fueling him on. He hadn’t seen any foundling sized armor in the pile yet but from what he knew, the oldest of Aili’s ade wouldn’t have child-sized armor anymore. 

“No!” 

“It was not his fault,” a voice familiar to both Aili and Mando said from another tunnel. The Armorer walked out, still looking like she had the last time Aili had seen her. The only difference was that she carried herself with what looked like the weight of the galaxy on her shoulders now. 

“We revealed ourselves. We knew what could happen if we left the Covert. The Imperials arrived shortly thereafter, this is what resulted.”

“Did any survive?” Mando asked, trying desperately to keep his gaze on the Armorer rather than turning to look over at Aili. He didn’t want to see her face if the Armorer gave bad news. 

“Yes, though I do not know how many,” the Armorer said before turning to look over at Aili who had taken in a sharp breath. “Aili Verdella, you should know that your ade are with what remains of the covert.”

“They’re--” Aili cut herself off, unsure she could even trust herself to finish her sentence. 

“Your ship was used to reach Oshriya. Your oldest said they owed you a favor and from there I do not know, only that the plan was to sell your ship for enough credits to spare for safe passage off planet,” the Armorer explained simply as she picked up the closest piece of armor on the ground. 

“They sold my ship?” Just like that, Aili went from being happy they were still alive to wanting to kill them herself. She had spent thousands of credits on that ship, making it livable and able to transport several bounties at once if needed. Had even made sure all of the crew quarters were ready just in case.

“Are you really getting mad about a ship?” Now Mando turned to look at Aili, disbelief in his voice. He would have expected her to be relieved at the very least. 

“It was a Glowzee-class, fully customized! Yes, yes I am now that I know they’re not dead. But they’re gonna wish they were when we find them." Aili was aware that it was stupid but she knew that it would have been Madsin’s idea to sell the ship and she would have been the only one brave enough to suggest it. 

“She’s got a point, Mando. That was probably a beautiful ship,” Cara said, wincing at the thought of losing a ship like that. Glowzees were not easy to come by, especially now in the New Republic. Only ship harder to get was a Razor Crest but no one really wanted those very much. Glowzees though...those were the equivalent of beskar to someone who wanted a ship off the grid for any reason. 

“Can we focus on the Imps that are still coming after us?” Mando said before Aili could go off about the ship. He agreed that a Glowzee-class ship was a terrible thing to lose but he wasn’t about to let Aili know that. Not until they were out of the very real danger of not being able to make it back to the Razor Crest. But now he understood why she always liked to comment on everything she didn’t like about his ship, it was definitely a step down from her own ship. 

“Fine.”

“Come with us.” Mando directed towards the Armorer who had been picking up pieces of armor and placing them in a bin as they spoke. Of course no one could see the look she was giving Mando and Aili from behind her helmet, the knowing look in her eyes along with a small smile playing at her lips. 

“I will not abandon this place until I have salvaged what remains.” The Armorer placed one more piece of armor into the bin before pushing it into the Forge. Mando and Aili followed after her silently while Cara and Karga gave each other a confused look before they too went into the room. 

“Show me the one whose safety deemed such destruction,” the Armorer said after she placed a cuirass into the Forge to melt it down. Aili stepped forward, holding Little Green up a little so the Armorer could see him. 

“This is the one,” Mando said, awkwardly shifting his feet. He wasn’t sure how the Armorer would react to Little Green. 

“This is the one that you hunted then saved?” Even Aili could tell that the Armorer was a little taken aback by the sight of Little Green. It was how she had felt when she had first seen him on the Crest, complete surprise that someone would place a bounty on a child. 

“Yes. The one that saved me as well,” Mando replied.

“From the mudhorn,” the Armorer clarified, wanting to be sure that she was understanding him correctly. 

“Yes.”

“It looks helpless.”

Little Green let out a coo, looking up at the Armorer with his big brown eyes. Aili let out a quiet snort at the thought of Little Green being helpless after what she had seen him do in the past couple of days. She still needed to ask Mando about this mudhorn story because she couldn’t even begin to imagine what that was about. 

“He’s injured but he’s not helpless. Its species can move objects with its mind,” Mando explained, hoping that the Armorer would know about these powers than any of them did. 

“I know of such things. The songs of eons past tell of battles between Mandalore the Great and an order of sorcerers called Jedi that fought with such powers,” the Armorer explained as she dipped one of her tools into the now molten beskar, gathering it up easily.

“Jedi?” Aili questioned quietly. She wracked her brain to try to remember if she had ever heard that word used before. She recalled hearing rumors about the Emperor and she wondered if this had been why certain girls got pulled from the Program as soon as they left basic.

“It is an enemy?” Mando asked and Aili turned her head to give him an unimpressed look. Even if Little Green’s kind were enemies to the Mandalorians, Little Green clearly wasn’t given how many times he had helped them. Neither of them even knew how long he had been away from his kind so there was no telling how much he had even been taught about his powers.

“No. Its kind were enemies but this individual is not,” the Armorer said, unknowingly speaking the thoughts that Aili was having. She turned away from them, slowly walking over towards a cabinet against the wall. 

“What is he?” Mando asked. Aili wondered just how many questions he had because even if the Armorer were to suddenly change her mind, she doubted even Mando would be able to harm Little Green. 

“It is a foundling.” The way the Armorer said it left no room for argument. The cabinet opened up to reveal the rest of her tools. “By Creed, it is in your care.”

Little Green let out a small gurgle, looking up at Aili before glancing over at Mando with his big brown eyes. 

Mando let out a quiet, almost scoff of surprise before he pointed at the kid, “You wish me to train him?”

“It is too weak. It would die. You have no choice, you must reunite it with its own kind,” the Armorer said bluntly and Aili was beginning to remember why she sometimes preferred to spend as little time as possible in the Forge after a job. Other than wanting to spend more time with her girls before she had to leave. The Armorer pulled something that Aili couldn’t see out and placed in on the workstation in front of her. 

“Where?” Aili asked before Mando could. She didn’t like the idea of it but as attached as she was to Little Green, she knew he would probably be better off with his own kind. Be it these Jedi or even just his own race. 

“This, you must determine,” the Armorer answered as if that would make it any easier for them. She poured some of the beskar into molds, setting the rest of the beskar aside. 

“You expect us to search the galaxy for the home of this creature and deliver it to a race of enemy sorcerers?” Mando questioned, unsure of this mission that the Armorer was giving them. He didn’t even have a clue as to where they would even start and the galaxy was not small by any means. 

“This is the Way.”

The way the Armorer spoke those words gave Aili pause, wondering if the other woman had meant to say it with that tone. The Armorer turned back around, using her hammer on the molds that she had just filled in. The sound was jarring with the silence coming from the rest of the Covert.

“These tunnels are going to be lousy with Imps in a matter of minutes, we should at least discuss some kind of escape plan,” Cara said, spurred on by the noise the Armorer was now making. It would make it easier for the Imps to find them now, the sound carrying throughout the room and more than likely throughout the tunnels. 

“If you follow the descending tunnel, it will lead you to the underground river,” the Armorer suggested as she placed her hammer down and picked up another tool. “It flows downstream into the lava flats.”

“I think we should go,” Karga said. He wasn’t going to mention that he had already said they should go that way. 

“I’m staying. I need to help her and to heal,” Mando said, turning to look over at Aili who already looked ready to argue. “You go with them to the ship, take it to Oshriya.”

“You must go.” The Armorer said before Aili even had a chance to open her mouth. She picked up the first of the molds and placed it in water to release the mold. She did so quickly doing the same for the second of the molds. “A foundling is in your care. Until you reunite the Child with his people or he becomes of age, you two will be as his parents.”

Cara barely held back the smile threatening to appear on her face as she glanced over at the look of shock on Aili’s face. She also noted the way Mando shifted one foot backwards as if he were about to keel over. She was liking the Armorer a little more now.  Little Green let out another coo, staring straight at Mando who had turned to look over at both him and Aili who was decidedly avoiding looking back at him. 

“This is the Way.” Now Aili knew the Armorer was almost mocking both of them with the way she said that. She had spent at least enough time to know when she was smiling beneath her helmet and this was definitely one of those times. She had basically just called Mando and her a pair. The Armorer spent a few more moments working on whatever had been in the second mold before she was finished.  

“You have earned your signet,” the Armorer said, turning around and holding the signet in her hand along with something smaller that neither Mando or Aili could clearly see. She walked over to Mando and quickly attached the signet to Mando’s pauldron. 

“Thank you. I will wear this with honor,” Mando said, standing a little straighter now.

Once the Armorer was satisfied, she turned around to look at Aili. “You are a clan of seven, the largest in recent times,” the Armorer said without preamble, holding out a pendant not unlike the one Mando had handed Aili back in the cantina except this one was also a mudhorn. Aili’s eyes went wide, even as she slowly reached out to take the necklace. It wasn’t like she’d be able to refuse anything from the Armorer. 

“Excuse me, seven?” Cara exclaimed quietly, eyes wide as she counted everyone present again. Sure there were seven of them there but she didn’t agree to join a Mandalorian clan even if she had grown to like fighting alongside one of them. And how could a droid even be in a clan?

“Don’t worry Cara, I have four girls that are off-world," Alli said. She wasn’t sure what to make of all the thoughts now going through her head. 

“Four, you look good for giving birth to four kids.” Karga commented, surprised he hadn’t known this. He had always prided himself in at least knowing the bare minimum about his bounty hunter’s personal lives, if only so he knew who to inform if they died during a job. But Aili always had been a mystery to him, never speaking of her personal life in the slightest. 

“They’re adopted, former Program like me.” Aili kept her explanation as short as possible, they didn’t need to know all of the details.

“Oh good, but also maybe don’t add to your clan any time soon because five kids is a lot,” Cara tried to joke despite her shock. 

“Two are considered adults now, you should be proud to know that Sula has indeed chosen to train as a medic,” the Armorer directed the last of her statement in Aili and Mando’s direction. She was aware that the younger girl had told her about her doubts of continuing down the path of the Fighting Corps like her older sister.

“I am, thank you.”

There were muffled explosions in the distance, too close for Aili’s liking since she knew sound carried itself differently in tunnels. “Time to go. Now,” Aili said, looking up at Mando who nodded in agreement. 

“IG, please guard the outer hallway. A scouting party draws near.” 

IG-11 did as he was asked, leaving the room quickly as the Armorer turned once more to pick something up near the forge. “I have one more gift for your journey. Have you trained in the Rising Phoenix?”

“When I was a boy, yes,” Mando responded. It had been a long time since then but he still remembered most of the training. 

“Then this will make you complete,” the Armorer said, turning back around to show him the jetpack in her hands. Aili and Cara let out low whistles of appreciation. The Armorer continued to speak as if they hadn’t done so. “When you have healed, you will begin your drills. Until you know it, it will not listen to your commands.”

“I understand. Thank you.”

Several blasters sounded and Cara and Karga pulled out their own just in case Storm Troopers appeared. Aili shifted her own hold on Little Green so she could unholster her blaster as well. She may be carrying the kid but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t be able to keep fighting. 

“You are protected,” IG-11 said as he stepped back into view of the entrance. 

“More will come. You must go.”

“Come with us,” Mando said, trying once more to get the Armorer to agree to leaving the now empty Covert. 

“My place is here, restock your munitions,” the Armorer said, leaving no room for Mando to argue with her. Not that he would ever argue with her. She went over to where IG-11 was now standing. “IG, carry this for Din Djarin until he is well enough to wear it.”

IG-11 took the jetpack without complaint and left the Forge once more. Mando did as he was told and restocked on charges.

“Now go. Down to the river and across the plains,” the Armorer said, watching as Cara and Karga left immediately. She took note of the way that Aili stayed in the entryway, obviously waiting for the Mandalorian that she had been travelling with. She looked back at Din Djarin as he finished restocking his munitions. “Be safe on your journey and protect your Clan to the best of your abilities.”

“I will. Thank you,” Mando said before taking out his blaster and leaving the Forge, Aili walking out by his side. The Armorer stood in front of the forge, watching as they left knowing that they would be fine despite anything the galaxy chose to throw their way. They would have to be strong with the remnants of the Empire after the Child in their protection but she knew they were stronger together. It was why she had sent Aili to him all those months ago afterall. 

[ambersky0319]

I keep having this recurring dream where I have 3 mom's, and they're all amazing!! They love me!!! I love them!!! We're all happy!!!! I feel happy 24/7!!! And it's great! One of them is Latina, I dunno how I know I jist remember ig, but she has black curly hair like you do. She looks kinda like your pfp? And I'm *assuming* that's a drawing of you, so pls correct me if I'm wrong. Anyway, I was curious if it was you in my dreams, being one of my moms. (1/?)

I have a  guess as to who one of the other moms is. I'm pretty sure it's Le?? ? (Lefaystrent, if you didn't know.) She has a black ponytail, and she sounds like Le. She calls me Taco as a joke, too, so I'm like 90% certain Le's invaded my dreams to become one of my 3 mom's. It's kinda weird to think about,,,,, :/ I'm kinda disappointed that you're not one of the moms asdfghjkl. Sorry sorry >

It's different!! I feel happy all of the time, I'm supported, I'm doing better in school!! The moms are almost always home, but they give me space but also hang out with me. We have this big house, and my bedroom has a hay window and my room is the way I want it to be. I'm,,, less fat, dunno how to say it properly, but I'm thin and uh,,, prettier? (They're unrelated, but I'm thinner and prettier) I guess. I'm exactly the way I want to be, but I'm still myself. Just the best version of me.  (3/?) 

We have a backyard, too!! We have 3 Cats,  2 dogs, a bird, and a rat, and 2 snakes. I help with taking care of them. My back doesn't hurt in the dreams. We have cool technology. We play board games every Tuesday,  and we go on daily walks. We're all so happy and perfect, it's great!! Iirc, I didn't get my period either, which is just odd. It's like I made the perfect fantasy world in my dreams. I don't like to think about it much, because none of my actual family members are there-  (4/?) 

-but Le is. And who I'm pretty sure was supposed to be you (but isn't,  bc she's latina). The third mother is actually who I based an OC off of (it's weird ik). She's a POC with vitiligo. She's really smart and happy, and i love her to bits (my oc and dream mom). But, I really don't like thinking about it because dad isn't there, and if it really IS a fantasy world, that means I don't like soemthing about my Real Dad, and I don't wanna dive into THAT. The only actual real family member in- (5/?) 

-in my dream world is my brother, Zack. But he's different, too. He's happier and he doesn't yell at me, and I don't yell at him. Which is reasonable, ig. I don't wanna fight with him, and I don't him to be depressed or upset ever again. And like. None of it is REAL, but it's starting to affect me. Zack yells at me, and I think about how in the dream world he wouldn't.  Dad tells me to do better next time, and I imagine my 3 mom's all hugging me telling me how proud of me they are. (6/?)

ANYWHO, this is getting kinda vent-y, so sorry. Didn't mean to that >

-----------------------------

I can guess why there was confusion 😅

My pfp is actually an OC of mine, one of the characters of Cinomed Chronicles- Leona! I just really like her design, though the only thing we have in common is pale skin. Since she’s one of the main characters of the story and I have a lot of fun drawing her, 9/10 times she’s my pfp on social media

Also? You have no need to apologize for sending so many asks, or for this turning a bit more venty! It was really interesting, hearing about all of this! Your dream world sounds like the closest thing to paradise I think I’ve ever heard about.

Since you’ve already based an OC off one of your dream moms, maybe you should do that for everyone else who’s in the dream? Or maybe write a story based on all this if you aren’t doing so already? It might help you figure things out or, if you want to distance yourself a bit from the dream maybe writing or drawing it can help with that?

Though I don’t really know if it would actually do that, it’s just an idea-

And like, I’ve sorta been in your place before where certain things make you question things that happen irl and it ends up affecting you and i honestly don’t know what it’s called but uh yeah you’re not alone

Sorry that I’m not one of your dream moms! They really do sound amazing

If you ever need to vent though hun, my ask box is always open! (you can also just message me if that’d be more comfortable for you)

Love ya too! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜❤️🧡💛💚💙💜❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

[migleefulmoments]

So... Abby responds to her family's intervention by obediently telling them she'll stop (ie. lying to them). She then immediately tries to find ways to keep the blog in secret, hiding behind various usernames, lurking on her coven's blogs, more time deleting posts from both blogs we know about. Meaning, instead of getting help, she spends even MORE time online engaging in more batshit crazy crap to cover her ass. Yeah, sure, that doesn't signal dire need for mental health intervention AT ALL.

It looks like that is what is happening.  We will have to see what the future holds. What does Abby do? 

So far the fandom is flailing. Cassie got a couple of anons- one that reads like those anons Abby used to send herself as it covers all the issues they are most upset about so perfectly well (My comments in parenthesis and italicized:: 

Anonymous asked: Even if I am unsure about CC itself, I don't buy M*arr*n. I just don't. And the other side is using doxing and the fact that you and others say things they don't like about M as an excuse to do so and as a way to detract from the fact that their couple goals have some pretty big, glaring plot holes in their love story. I've not seen anyone on this side of the fandom out or dox anyone publicly as a way of humiliation. M gave up her privacy by dating D, but Abby didn't and they were wrong. Period. 

cassie1022 answered: Nonnie, I swear every time they diagnose us as mentally ill or say we’re bitter hags, an LGBTQ angel gets his or her wings. We all know my beliefs, but there are MANY people that are like you and don’t know for sure about CC but sure as hell know Miarren isn’t a normal, healthy relationship. (Funny thing, I don’t remember anyone diagnosing Cassie as mentally ill. Cassie is alwasy the wallflower that nobody wants to dance with and she tries so hard to be part of the fun people. Last week she was sad because I hadn’t sent her a “hate” message (See comment in last post below) 

Even if I remove D from the situation, I would still think M is a lazy, spoiled toddler with no discernable work ethic coupled with a superiority complex that rivals the Cheeto in Command of the US.

You are absolutely correct. Our fandom just wants to be left alone. We don’t send hateful asks to the other side. We don’t have to. They feel they have the right to dox CCers because they don’t like what we say about M, a woman that would light a cigarette from the flames engulfing them and not call 911 to help them. I mean, honestly, it doesn’t get much lower than mocking someone’s death. Plus, as you correctly said, M put herself in the spotlight “dating” D. If she didn’t want that attention, she would have stayed in the background. There are plenty of celebrities married to non famous people and we don’t see them at every event like we do M. (It is BAFFLING to me that they can’t comprhend something as simple and obvious as the reasaon they “see Mia everywhere” is because they fucking stalk her and they hyperanalzye every photo Darren is in looking for her. If they started stalking Ben Feldman they would see his wife just as much as they see Mia).    

Bottom line is what they did to Abby was deplorable, but, just like their kween, they feel justified in doing whatever they want. This isn’t the first time they’ve crossed a line with regards to my friend, but it was the worst.

notes-from-nowhere Anon, they love to throw the guilt of their actions on our shoulders, it’s how they justify what they do to themselves. They need us to be the bad guys otherwise what is the only option left? (I never know what the hell Notes is trying to say- throw the guilt of our actions on their shoulders? I’d love an example of that. I can’t imagine what guilty action I put on their shoulder. As for needing them to be the bad guys or what do we have left? OMFG are you kidding me? We critcize the cc fandom for being misogynistic, homophobic, bullies who attack  Mia, Darren, Ricky and their own Nonnies. They have viscioulsy attacked people in their own fandom who dared to question them. But the biggest reason we push back is because THEY LIE. All the damn time. So what do we have left? Being on the right side, being correct, not lying, not needing to lie, and the joy of watching Darren live his best life)   

Leka got a couple of asks but her answers were weak, confusing and pointless. It’s clear she isn’t ready to take over as their leader. She repeated Abby’s main talking points, tried to use big words to sound smarter and basically ended up not making a lot of sense:

Anonymous asked: I could be wrong, and I hope I am, but I think the character on the HW poster holding the girl is D's character, it would fit if you look at the other guys on the poster, maybe this is already the first hint to show D's character is not gay and so technically not breaking the no more queer roles rule his team set for him. It won't make it any better because it's still a career on the bag of LGBTQ+ people with it's teams but it's technically not a broken rule. I just really need for things to change, I want them to so bad, it kills me seeing someone so kind in a situation like that, and I truly believe D is one of the kindest people in that horrible town. He deserves better than M, I wouldn’t even mind if he goes onto another beard but she and RR just need to go. I really think it’s crazy people still think everything HW is real and PR relationships don’t exist, I wished that place was just better and had a moral compass, people deserve more it kind of shows just how jaded this situation has made me, I can’t even enjoy amazing promo material without directly twisting it into something negative, I don’t want to be this way and if I feel like this I can’t even imagine how D must feel. He is stronger than I’ll ever be living through hell every day, even if he’s not ok he’s still here and holding on, I don’t know if I could in his position. Sorry for the long message and the unneeded negativity, I guess I just had to vent a little

*********************************

Leka answered: So let’s look at the way HW is described:

“Each character offers a unique glimpse behind the gilded curtain of Hollywood’s Golden Age, spotlighting the unfair systems and biases across race, gender and sexuality that continue to this day. Provocative and incisive, HOLLYWOOD exposes and examines decades-old power dynamics, and what the entertainment landscape might look like if they had been dismantled.”

I do consider this the very intriguing thing about the news. (And it just goes to show that believing everything you’re sold is being utterly and completely ignorant.) Let’s say you’re right because ofc it’s possible. How does R/aymond fit in here? Given the excessive way team shit has pushed that article, a technicality won’t be good enough. There has to be a better plan. This doesn’t match what’s been said in his name.

What I think is this doesn’t necessarily have to mean much. You know very well what you see doesn’t have to be the (full) truth. That doesn’t just apply to the real HW. Especially considering the time period of this show. And let’s not forget the pap pics we got at a gas station. This doesn’t rule out SB as an inspiration. I would advise anyone to read up on him. We don’t know at this point. As we keep saying, the best thing to do is to wait and see. I’m certainly interested in finding out more.

As time goes on, the danger of this situation keeps becoming even clearer to me. D deserves much, much better. He’s incredibly strong, but the most toxic person in his life needs to go and she’s more than welcome to take the jumping jackass with her. That’s definitely the most important thing right now. (I’m curious what the danger of Hollywood is?)

awesome-fanfictionada: @leka-1998I’m just wondering - it must have been D who got himself this job on HW, right? Couldn’t this have been done on purpose to counter that ridiculous statement - which wasn’t even accurate, if the source was that interview where he stated that he wouldn’t want to be a casting director? Could in this case RM be a friend?

leka-1998:  @awesome-fanfictionada Yes, he did that himself. Again. And he said the show’s been sold late in 2018. According to an article that came out later, it happened in February 2019. Not true.

HW has been a thing before that statement was made, which is indeed very different from the answer D himself gave during the interview. That’s what makes the article seem like sabotage by team shit. And standing in RM’s way is never a good idea. So while I will obviously never like him, I’m reserving judgment on his current role until we know more.

Anonymous asked: The underlying issue in general is really that social media has made it so people think they get an accurate glimpse into the lives of celebrities, when in reality social media, like everything else that is publicly released about them, is used as a marketing tool. People are actually more inauthentic than they've ever been because they feel pressure to maintain a certain image for social media at all times. So anyone who decides D is living honestly, it's because they want to believe he is.

Leka: True, nonnie. Just look at the text lines that are becoming more popular again. Not nearly as genuine as people want to believe. In D’s case, what has to be brought up? M. Oh Halloween and her amazing shopping skills praised on SM. The work fam honeymoon pic promoting the place they stayed at. Coa/chella for the H&M ad. Mardi Gras posted shortly after the mockery to promote the designer. I could obviously go on. Most of what we see on SM shows the person the 10 year crew wants him to be. And what looks like a split personality if you compare certain posts. Which brings me back to ‘they want to believe’, as what you’re saying clearly isn’t a secret. Anyone can choose to ignore it but at this point, if that’s the case even though you’re more or less paying attention, it’s really a conscious decision.

Oh btw, there’s a HW IG account now and it already has a D follow. Imagine that. R/oyalties co-stars, anyone?

Flowers didn’t get any asks. Amazing since she has more followers than I do and she bragged about getting more “notes” than me.  She did answer azscc who posted an odd rant that baffles me.  Who the fuck is azscc and who is posting anything about her? I realize I am not the only person in this fandom posting about ccers But I just checked all the blogs that I know of and nobody is talking about her; 

azsc  its so weird how chillarrens call me a bully while i only say something rude towards them if they write bullshit towards me. and its just ironic how chillarrens go around calling people bullies while they are the reason why tons of cc accounts use their accounts private or don’t post their opinions and etc. the real threat to the fandom are people like you. so instead of going around throwing shit on people and calling them “mental, delusional...” get a life. no cc believer goes around hunting for chillarren pics and insult the account owner so why don’t you all grow up and realize no one has to agree with your opinions. every crisscolfer blog/twitter page/insta acc basically stan accs never asked for your opinions on their pages so why don’t you just let it go? no one cares about what you all say or do so why are you forcing it this much?

call me a bully i am pretty much okay with that. its obvious that people are unable to understand basic sarcasm and irony and i am not judging because to actually understand what people say you have to at least have an average IQ level. and if you don’t have it, it’s okay but that doesn’t mean you can twist people’s words and post them all over the internet. but its lowkey really funny that i only had my instagram acc for something like 4/5 months and i received over 300 hate/insult/blackmail/death wish messages and etc. and who are you people to call us bullies? (Nobody is a Chillarren. Darren and Mia are married and Chris and Will are in a long-term relationsihp,  Nobody has to “ship” them in order to believe they are together. In America, we accept that when someone introduces their wife or their boyfriend they are telling the truth. It is customary to address that person as their wife or boyfriend respectively. The crisscolfers on the other hand, must use a fandom ship name because they are shipping two people who are not in a relationship and never were. All evidence indicates Chris and Darren are no long friends; they are nothing more than former co-workers-friendly and polite when they see one another but no longer involved in one another’s lives. Chris and Darren both have denied (more than once) that the were ever in a relationship).  .   

flowersintheattic254 I have never in my whole time here posted an anon to a Miarren account. I have no desire to. I’m confident in my beliefs.

The interesting thing for me is that I’ve been here for about four years now and in that time I’ve seen the head of the fandom disappear, other people disappear because their families have been doxed, established long-term cc blogs with a wealth of history deleted without warning. I myself have had my daughters threatened.  This sort of stuff doesn’t happen anywhere in the fandom but here here. If we are a bunch of delusional crazy middle-aged women then this shouldn’t happen. (Who was doxed? Who dissappered? It’s all “liar liar” with everything ccers say. In the last 4 years Abby has been the only leader of the cc fandom. Michelle left between 4 and 5 years ago because her outrageious cc comments threatened her ability to raise money for her little Klaine-fanfic rip-off movie. I vaguely remember someone asking flowers how her daugther’s would feel if they read what she writes- hardly a threat. If there was something more she never posted any proof. As for blogs being deleted- so was D-Criss News.  It happens. The only cc blog that I know of that disappeared was DisneyPrincessModelWorld’s original blog which had was a hot mess of lies and catfishing. She visciously bullied Mia. Hardly someone to mourn their blog being deleted). 

It’s shocking that an actor may lgbt causes such drama. (HUH?)

Flower’s comment is so disingenuous. While it is technically true -she hasn’t sent me anons, she HAS instead publically ridiculed me and frankly, I can’t see how that is any different? I’d say it’s worse because they wanted their followers to see what they wrote and the only way to ensure that is to post it on their blogs. Flowers and Abby posted many public “Michy” posts.  Here is her most recent: 

flowersintheattic254Oh and I guess Michy sent us all some hate today.

I guess I have way more followers than you and only about 4 that send hate. You haven’t for ages.

I think I have over 70,000 hits currently to my blog. I must be saying something interesting.

He’s been married allegedly for a year and people still doubt. That’s gotta hurt you. Anyway......

✌️

ajw720 Michy told me today today that the outing couldn’t possibly be promo, because JS was only cast in September!  What a moron who clearly doesn’t know how HW works.  Sweetheart, it was ANNOUNCED in September;)

I was waiting for a few more months, but in 4 years, since i have been tracking, i have almost a million! (976,695 to be precise).

It is amazing that so many people care about what us bat shit crazy, irrelevant, psychologically unstable, threatening, hateful tin hats have to say!  And that does not include people reading on their dash or that hit you on the app!  So yep, Michy, clearly what we are saying is being monitored by someone.  And clearing making people think!! But you keep wasting your time writing for your audience of 4:)

cassie102 I feel left out, Michy didn't come at me today. Must hurt like hell knowing you're a joke that perpetuates a bigger joke.

leka-1998 Birds of a fake feather flock together. When the right person says tomorrow’s Christmas, tomorrow’s Christmas. Get ready, everyone.

If I narrow it down to the last six months, about 10,000 btw. Hm strange.

flowersintheattic254 @ajw720 the number of hits you have give me oxygen. If Michy thinks they are haters then she is delusional. People know when they are being sold something fake and they look for answers.

[theexecutionerssong]

I’m replying to everyone who’s sent me a message regarding the being nicer thing from yesterday under the cut because I don’t want to be annoying by publishing so many asks. thank you, all of you ♥

Honestly, I think it’s ridiculous that people are accusing you of sounding mean/rude etc. sometimes I think you’re still too nice to the rude anons and I feel like a lot of this is passive aggressive on their part. They come at you because they think you’re an ‘insider’ fan and they’re jealous, and if you come back defensively, then they accuse you of being rude blah blah blah. If these people are making your experience on tumblr a negative one then just ignore those asks and enjoy yourself bb! 

Hmm idk I mean it wouldn’t cross my mind to go after someone because they know some things I don’t? So they probably have a point somewhere in telling me I should be kinder, I know I can be short when I answers asks because I get so many and sometimes the same ones every other day so it gets a bit tiring...

hello! for sounding "nicer" i know when it comes to like texting friends and stuff. i always over use emojis and 'lol' bc i think when you don't it makes people (including myself) read it in a kind of boring/unimpressed tone in my head. LIKE HOW CAPS MAKES ME YELL IN MY HEAD LOL. (disclaimer: i'm a recent follower and find you nothing but nice. and you definitely don't owe any of us to go out of your way to type differently so you come across as 'nicer'. your english is fantastic!)

if I ever use lol then it’s because I find the thing extremely not funny and it’s ironic ahah I try to use emoji but when on my computer I can’t really be bothered... Thank you very much for your message!

I don’t think you’re rude, I think sometimes you get defensive because you’ve been getting the same questions over and over again and you must get tired. And you’ve talked about having insomnia so you must also be physically tired on top of mentally. That’s normal, we’re all humans. Don’t worry about it.

Yeah it’s true, I do get defensive when I’m more tired. Sometimes when I need to vent, I read my inbox outloud to a friend - the asks I don’t publish I mean - and it helps but sometimes I don’t have anyone next to me to do that with so I get cranky when I see people prying into the cast’s lives, asking personal questions, things like that. It’s hard to ignore when you read the same disturbing things every couple of days. Thank you ♥

You're not annoying at all, on the contrary, you're the sweetest! It's just that I think people are frustrated that you know so much without sharing, and maybe also the fact that you continue to think you're a normal fan, even though you're clearly "in". I don't know, I'm trying to understand... I think it might be jealousy as well.

The thing is, I can’t say for now how I’ve come to know some stuff because it would spoil way too much and I don’t know if I’ll even be able to ever. I’m not really “in”, that’s the thing. I am a normal fan, as normal as a fan who’s lucky enough to live in Paris and who could go to a lot of events - and that’s a couple hundreds of us. I don’t know how much the international fandom is aware of that but David and Niels and the cast know hundreds of us by name just because we were lucky enough to meet them several times. I’m not really more “in” than those other people. Some from the cast have not a clue who I am at all and others only know my @ on instagram because I send them the pics. I’m a bit closer to some for reasons I can’t talk about. The team got a lot of complaints about everything always happening in Paris and some fans ending up being more priviledged than others. I’m hoping there will be more events outside of Paris, maybe screenings or something in the future so it doesn’t feel as ~Parisian elite~ as last year.

I think you’ve always been receptive when people came to you with a different opinion and from what I saw, you’re always willing to learn. Some people are just too entitled and come barging in and that’s when you raise you hackles. It’s not really on you, it’s hard to be kind to everyone when people don’t always deserve it.

Hmmm yeah, my friends have told me I have strong opinions and don’t change my mind easily so... idk. I could maybe be more receptive, like you said, at times. I went from getting one ask every six months to dozens a day in a few weeks last year and it still blows my mind. I wasn’t ready for that. There must be people who disagree with me in my followers. Idk. Something I need to think about. Thanks ♥

bonsoir tumblr grandma! 💫 in my humble opinion, you do not come off as rude. I just think sometimes people tend to read what they wanna read and make the worst out of it. Plus, the whole Even season is a really touchy subject because everyone would love one and when such announcements of possibles seasons happen, they can't help but be hopeful. So of course they don't like it when they're told it's not gonna happen. You're not rude, you're just saying things they don't want to hear. 🤷‍♀️ ily!

I know how much people must be upset to see their hopes crushed, I was disappointed too back when I first heard about it, and my hopes were not that high to begin with since David had said before Eliott wasn’t considered as main. I get asks every week about Eliott being main, almost every gifset I make will have a tag about how whatever is clearly a reference to Eliott being main and I’m just like... let it go. Or talk about it on your own posts. I’m sad it’s not happening. Don’t rub it in my face, you know? I didn’t say anything for months and accepted it was the way it would be so I couldn’t complain but then Henrik mentioned it to someone at HOS2 and I thought that finally those asks and comments would stop but they don’t and it’s very tiring. Anyway, thank you as always!

I don't think you're rude and i don't know you irl it's just that some of your anons are creepy and acted so demanding like you owe us something and it pissed me off actually. Like those anon who asked something like you know this right? How you know abt this? Why you know the cast? It sounds so suspicious that you know them etc. these anons are so nosy like why so negative. Istg i thought they would interrogate you yesterday after you mentioned abt working with assa before skamfr.

I’m gonna say something I haven’t really shared in details before but it’s weighting on me. Some anons are really creepy, so I don’t publish them. For exemple, somebody found my spotify recently and through it found my old Facebook. My friends have sent me screenshots of people following them on their instagram after being tagged in my stories and they are always Skam stans, even when my friends have never posted about anything Skam related. Someone once went digging into my personal life so far that they could have ruined the theme of season 5 in september if they had decided to make what they had found public instead of sending me an ask about it. That shit is not okay. I blew up about this once last year and somebody told me “why do you make it sounds like we’re creepy fans of yours” and well, because some stuff IS creepy. I understand being curious but I will never share anything about the personal lives of the cast or anything that could spoil the seasons so I’d just like it if people stopped asking, you know? Thank you for reaching out ♥

gaëlle you never even once came off as rude (i started following you in february-march when s3 was airing). you're always helpful and patient. it's obvious when ppl go to cons/projos/meet the cast they might unintentionally find out smth that's not public knowledge. and it's a good thing actually that you don't immediately run here to share bc maybe a cast member didn't mean to reveal smth etc. in any case you don't owe us any information and those who demand answers are the rude ones

Thank you, love. yeah I’ve lost counts of how many times they’ve accidentally spoiled something at cons or screenings or in the background of ig stories, especially in the beginning. They are more careful now and some even let slip fake spoilers to see if it will spread (and by some I mean Axel after his play when he stays to talk to fans lmao). The fans who’ve learned stuff that way are usually super protective of the show though so nothing really spreads and that’s really nice to see - sorry Axel, joke’s on you ahah

Hi Gaëlle! Just want to say that I followed you because you always sound soooo sweet and sincere when answering asks. Never thought you're rude, even sometimes I thought you could be ruder because the ask was rude😂 Anyway, just thought let you know my opinion on the last ask, have a good day!🥰

Thank you darling. I’m sure I must have been rude at some point, I don’t think the anon from yesterday would have said that out of the blue, and I’m very sorry that I don’t realize it. Unless when people are REALLY rude then I allow myself to tell them to fuck off dfghjk

You don’t know me but I saw you a lot at HOS2, I recognized you from your instagram. Every time I saw you, you were cuddling people, laughing, singing - I heard you sing with your friends and Maxence joining in, it was adorable! The cheers the cast let out when they saw you come up for the group pictures weren’t fake. You have an aura around you that brightens the room. I really hope this isn’t too weird of me to say. I don’t think you could ever be unkind. You wouldn’t have so many friends otherwise - I mean, it looked like you do - and the cast wouldn’t have reacted like that upon seeing you. That alone convinced me you were a good person.

Oh my god I don’t know what to say. This is very unexpected, why didn’t you come say hi if you knew who I was? I wouldn’t have minded at all! Thank you, I don’t know what to say, really this is so kind. Have a lovely day. Thank you. thank you.

You're one of the nicest people I know, you're a literal bundle of love and sunshine (I'm not even kidding, really). And you're always so considerate about everybody when you're responding to asks that are asked NICELY... so really I don't know how you can come across as rude. And you deserve all the love 💕

Merci @littlhedgehog love you so so much and I’m so happy Skam brought us together. It’s been way too long since I gave you a hug ♥♥♥

and at 3 parts anon with advice who told me not to publish, thank you too, I’ll remember everything you said ♥

[transkieran]

anyway, guarma & colm-odriscoll-is-my-daddy (& friends) think abusive ships are a funny way to get under someone’s skin

JUST FYI: I woulda had this conversation in private, but @guarma keeps calling Erin a bitch with a god-complex, even though everything she accuses Erin of is something I did, and she refuses to acknowledge me. So no more private, she called me a pussy for not confronting her. Well here's the confront ig!

background context: people decided to start shitting on the Yehaw Function server again in another server (let’s say ‘A’ bc I do not wish to drag the owner into this, they were rarely online). @ssupeck21 thought it was perfectly fine to mock the gender and race of a two-spirited native trans guy. nice transphobia and racism there! 

considering i remarked on it, they realized i knew him and suspected me of leaking the above screenshot to the YF server. i had already left this server at the end of february over several reasons, including erin’s server becoming my main one. i’m also reasonably sure i have mentioned no longer being in YF at some point. damage done: kate (guarma) and pongo ( @colm-odriscoll-is-my-daddy ) now think i’m “a spy” for YF. (ironic because @ssupeck21 let @jennyxbeans into erin’s server bc she was spying for jenn. and more irony later)

as proven in DM to someone later (oh no, a spied image?), they had the amazing idea to bait me and erin with something that is a massive trigger for me (bully/victim ships). some weirdness: by that time, i’d only made about 2 b/k posts on my blog, neither of which mentioned my trauma i’m pretty sure. erin meanwhile, wasn’t even in the original convi from the first screenshot, though she has mentioned she finds b/k gross. 

so whilst this in its entirety is already immature in itself (really? you think someone is sending screenshots and wanna get ‘revenge’ when you constantly rely on getting screenshots yourself? yes i know someone leaked you screenshots of YF, kate). but also: for someone who talked about being abused and having anxiety, she should know better than use an abusive ship to get back at someone. because i’m 99% sure she knows b/k is a trigger for me; whilst not on my blog, i have had plenty of rants and vents in servers about how b/k is not good for my mental health and that it will make me panic. 

conversation #1 (i do not have screenshots of this): someone asked what everyone’s ships are in rdr2. bill/kieran gets mentioned, at some point i put rooWut (a disgusted looking emote) and remark something about abusive gay ships being cute to them. it gets glossed over, i leave. 

conversation #2. the conversation moves to the nsfw channel, where they pin the message in the above screenshot. ha ha , bully/victim ships are a funny joke! conversation moves on to arthur and other things until Pongo clearly feels like she wants to force a reaction out of me and/or erin. (living dead girl is erin, i am dan’s achy breaky heart).

at this point, my anxiety spikes and i put something along the lines of “my fist up your ass would look cute” in the vent chat of Erin’s server. NSFW with b/k is not good for me, at all. it made me flashback to something, i’m basically just trying to not have a panic attack. but ! ofc , why stop now. 

pongo makes another comment, now not under a spoiler tag and clearly with the context of the DM to get another reaction out of me. erin puts a completely unrelated image to try and divert the conversation, because i’m like entirely losing it at this point---but kate and pongo think it’s hilarious to talk about actually shipping it and kate (micah bell’s dumb hair in the screenshots) is all “omg i wanna write a smut now for them”. 

also: my nickname in this server includes ‘trans kieran’ at this point , either as just my url or like “lion ♡ trans kieran”. they all know i am a gay trans guy, even if some of them currently like to pretend they don’t know me. (hi, @morlawny who doesn’t even wanna say my name at this point despite being all nice in erin’s server.)

i can’t entirely remember my own message, nor do i have screenshots of it because i send it and left and they deleted it like straight after it seems (because an older screenshot, from the day itself, also didn’t have my message anymore). i left because at that point, i lost all ability to think straight. because someone can remark on b/k before and they’ll still be all “ha ha funny!”

at this point, in erin’s server, two things happen. one friend of kate, who isn’t in the server this happened in, asks if she ships bill/kieran and kate admits her plan to just trigger me. because of this, kate starts acting like the victim and making me out like the bad guy who’s shittalking her and refuses to talk to her--which, during a panic attack and with my feelings very clear, i don’t need to. 

secondly, another friend of kate decides my trauma is funny and starts to send kate (on request) screenshots of the vent conversation in erin’s server, starting from the goddamn my fist up your ass comment. the conversation also includes details of my trauma. my trauma is being send around like gossip. 

also this happens in the server i left and i get send it: 

i dunno what planet anyone is living on but, apparently my melt down was only good for one thing: getting mocked. “kieran’s coochie” is transphobic as fuck when you’re laughing at a trans guy getting upset over bill/kieran. especially when it’s very clear i hc kieran as trans. yet, pongo, wolfy ( @soulheartthewolf ) and kate seem to think it’s fucking hilarious. 

kate and pongo then try to play the “we were just joking!” card. when everyone i’ve had read those screenshots agrees nothing about it reads as a joke, and we’re now very sure they weren’t joking about, they were being vile and malicious. (but hey, what’s to expect from someone who says they’d fuck a fictional racist if he was real! that’s ... excusing racism, kate).  

(guarma is micah bell? you mean my husband ;; pongo is arthur morgan is an incel. the other person is the artist who drew young micah, idk their url anymore)

“my mocking of the Bill/Kieran ship” I’m so sorry, Kate, but nothing about nsfw b/k and wanting to write a fic about it, reads as mocking. This entire “it’s just a joke!” doesn’t diminish the fact that you triggered a panic attack. Yes, I shittalked you, because I felt like it was goddamn deserved for "joking” about an abusive ship in a way that didn’t read as a joke. because after I left neither of you got the damn hint and just went straight for the transphobia. It’s not get together and hate guarma, it’s “lion has a panic attack and will actually react insanely aggressively about the things that upset him”. You can turn and twist this into you being the victim all you want, but you ain’t. You’re a pathetic example of a 19 year old who thinks it’s funny to trigger flashbacks and panic attacks. I didn’t talk to you, because at the time the only thing I would’ve probably said, which is also what I’m saying now, is: go shove an entire cactus up your ass, you pathetic cunt of a human being. 

Leave Erin out of this, it’s goddamn hilarious you keep going after a cis bi woman instead of after me, a gay trans guy, and god I fucking wonder why. 

You interact with people who think they can just be racist and transphobic towards anyone they like ( @ssupeck21 ), with people who’ll willing send you all the screenshots you want, with people who send anon hate ( @jennyxbeans ), you’re treating trauma and abuse like a joke and then have the gal to be all “i’d never because i have anxiety!” No. Own up to your shit. 

(I could go on in this post about how she’s just as bad a shittalking, leaked screenshot-wanting piece of shit but hey, the post is very long already so whatever). 

edit: i have deleted screenshot leaking accusations towards morlawny bc i can’t actually prove them but i’m keeping up the thing where you decided to be all nice to me in servers, but then turned around and were all “idk kate didn’t say any of that” (i literally know u were there for those conversations, your name in screenshots!) and tried to defend her constantly in a DM with someone. 

[dyrwoodan]

i want to have like,, more ocs. and i do have some wip ones. or more like.. i've had them for a while now but i don't have time or energy to make them into something more :/ just wanted to make a quick post about them with some basic points about what i have so far. and i want to include them in my oc page later but rn i haven't had much time to develop them both because i'm just not feeling overly creative lately and also because i'm not playing games much and since they are from games i haven't even finished yet,, ye, i don't have much.

skye - trans and angry, unpredictable and a bastard, because it wouldn't be a ravcore oc if they weren't a bastard in some shape or form - loves arson and his machete - he's from fnv. haven't played much so i need to finish the game first to have more on him lol but 'tis what i have so far - kinda uhhh a.. vent oc? idk?? same with rowan tbh. i made them both around the same time and like. i been havin some issues. i've chosen to address these issues by making them into ocs lmao because i don’t exactly want to talk about it - so they are (both) my first trans ocs ig - idk tbh i've been thinking about some of my other ocs being trans, like kaz caiwyn and ryon, and i'm still playing around with that but.. i just didn't feel like talking about it because i'm scared (??) of something?? - but i made skye and i made rowan and i was like... hm. they are trans. so there's that

rowan (??) - idk i liked rowan when i made them but i might change the name to somehting more elfy and longer and fancy - they are a dunmer, morrowind oc - same as with skye, haven't finished morrowind yet so,, - so i mean so far rowan is a potter in vivec lmao but we'll get to the nerevarine stuff later - but i like them... being just a potter tbh - because (being lost) wandering around vivec at one point i came across a pottery?? and it was?? so cute :/ i miss pottery. i used to do that. t'was relaxing. - so rowan is a potter. i'm still looking for morag tong. let me iiiiiin

ma'reisha - khajiit oc in skyrim - i wanted to start a completely new playthrough and play the actual game with main quest n shit because when i play as ravell i just goof around lol - but i don't have much on her yet? i just? like her board?? - her aesthetic is grey. i love grey. - so far what i have on her is that she is...... distant. - idk how to insert her into skyrim tho. into ravell-verse i mean. maybe she'll be a completely new dragonborn? in a skyrim where ravell doesn't exist? which sounds horrible tbh, can't imagine ravell not existing :/ - idk we’ll have to think about this a bit more

aaliyah - idk who followed me back on my old blog but i also think i had her for a while on this new one? - she was my first ever warden. cousland. i made caiwyn and he kinda took over so i deleted her from my oc page but - i still very much care about her lol i think about bringing her back because i've been updating her board anyway - i just felt like.. only caiwyn can exist... but what if...... she exists in caiwyn-verse.. hmm - gotta think on this a bit more. as with all of the above. like i said, i just didn't have much time to think but i want to because all i do is basically save things into boards on pinterest - and thank god for that tbh at least i feel like i'm not neglecting my ocs completely

wren - i know i had them on my oc page but since i'm not playing poe i removed them temporarily - but i would love to get back to poe one day and bring wren back :/

cassian - while we're talkin about poe - he was another oc i wanted to make in poe after wren's playthrough - idk much about poe and i also don't remember much from what i knew lmao rip but,, - i wanted him to be a fancy painter from old valia and he has a cool aesthetic and a neat board - thatse it - but when i made my morrowind oc (rowan) i thought about changing cassian from a poe oc to that in morrowind - so idk i might just merge them into one

ok i realized this is more like.. a stream of consciousness lmao and it's very incoherent and idk if i'll ever talk about some of these ocs again but.. i wanted to ramble. i don't feel like doing anythinggggg tbh but at least....... i had actual Thoughts about some ocs so, that's good. would love it if my brain returned from war tho. pleas e..... come back i want to develop my ocs.......................

[othernecessarythings]

back on my bullshit again

and once more!! if you happen to stumble across these posts of mine, please just ignore them.. they’re a way for me to reflect on my life (and improve my english), and while i can’t stop you from reading them, can i say that you probably wouldn’t benefit much from it lol. anyways let’s go

1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.

my lots of songs list: the love club-lorde, river en vacker dröm-håkan hellström, living dead-marina, why we ever-hayley williams, snälla bli min-veronica maggio, take this lonely heart-nothing but thieves

2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

oof um the person who will be the love of my life? no lol but like zendaya would be pretty cool ig

3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

“... and the top was red-and-white striped, and it all zipped up in the front.”

4) What do you think about most?

hmm my friends maybe?

5) Ever had a poem or song written about you?

not that i know of

6) Do you have any strange phobias?

nah i feel some trypophobia (?spelling) sometimes but that’s it

7) What’s your religion?

i’m kinda christian, but like i choose which parts to believe in and not, like i believe in the message of doing good and love, but not like homophobia or an actual god lol

8) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

sitting in the sun, listening to music

9) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

ah probably paramore, yeah it must be them

10) What was the last lie you told?

eh kinda basic but “i’m fine” i guess

11) Do you believe in karma?

ooh that’s a questioning worth discussing, no i don’t believe in the actual the-universe-is-constantly-judging-our-actions, but like that people who do good tend to get good things back? yeah that makes sense

12) What does your URL mean?

my main (neon-places) is from perfect places by lorde, and just neon bc it sounds cool

13) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

oh god if i only knew,,, i really need to improve my empathy, but my systematical skills are quite good

14) Who is your celebrity crush?

hayley williams

15) How do you vent your anger?

i don’t get mad😌😌 no but like when i get irritated do i just close my door to my room and like listen to music in headphones and solve a puzzle or something lol

16) Do you have a collection of anything?

i kinda collect things that mark an important/memorable event in my life, like my first pride bracelet, my favorite jeans from when i was like 15, lots of birthday cards,, yeah it’s not so unique, but they’re important to me

17) Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

yes!!!! me a few years ago would’ve never thought that i’d be like this now, but i’m proud of myself and what i’ve become!!

18) What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

fun fact i HATE sleeping to the sound of rain. it makes me really anxious,, i love the sound of waves though, or my little sisters pure laugh :,)

19) What’s your biggest “what if”?

what if i’m just faking everything, what if this is not actually me but something i put up to please others around me

20) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

not ghosts really, but there must be some sort of life in the whole fucking space,, while maybe not what we traditionally would categorize as “life”, must it exist something, somewhere

21) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

i’m in my bed so like. my nightstand to the right, my wall to the left

22) Smell the air. What do you smell?

absolutely nothing, i’m so used to the smell of my house

23) What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

oo idk??? i’m usually quite content with wherever we’re going, although fotografiska in stockholm was shitty though

24) Most attractive singer/s of your opposite gender?

oh um like tyler joseph maybe? gerard way, frank iero? yeah i’m an emo slut

25) To you, what is the meaning of life?

no don’t go there,, thereisnomeaningoflifesoitsallaboutmakingasmuchaspossibleandliveashappilyaspossiblyuntilourfleetingexistenceonthisearthisover

26) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

.. yeah you could say that i drove, i have a driving license after all, and i’ve never crashed but i’ve been stopped by police a few times lol

27) What was the last movie you saw?

no idea, i never watch movies... or wait!! we had legally blonde on at my friends house a few days ago when we got home from a party, i didn’t exactly watch it but it was playing

28) What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

i’ve had some bad allergic reactions in form of severe eczema

29) Do you have any obsessions right now?

‘the devil and god are raging inside me’ by brand new, doing my makeup a special way

30) Ever had a rumor spread about you?

yeah, that i’m gay and together with my earlier best friend (we were not)

31) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

not really,, i’m really fucking scared of conflicts so i simply forgive and move on, it’s easier that way

32) What is your astrological sign?

pisces baby

33) What’s the last thing you purchased?

a blue skirt second hand!! v cute

34) Love or lust?

um idk i’ve never really experienced any of them, but maybe love

35) In a relationship?

nope

36) How many relationships have you had?

a whopping amount of zero

37) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

I DONT KNOW someone tell me please how to get someone to like me,, but like more friendship-like is it usually to always choose my words very carefully to not upset anyone, it usually gets me quite far

38) Where is your best friend?

where? i hope she’s home? well like we took the bus home together a few hours ago, so i guess she’s home

39) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

aha ha funny,, i was having a small mental crisis so i sat and did math (by free will, school has ended for summer) while listening to melodrama.. yes

40) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

i don’t know, this is so hard.. but like. no? or it wouldn’t really work to have someone like me as a close friend, i’m to introvert, i tend to surround myself with extroverts who bring me with them to do stuff

41) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

oh um i call 112 (the swedish 911) and make sure someone else notice the dog too and help it while i hurry to my job

42) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

a) yes, i think so. only my closest though, to give them a chance to say goodbye properly, but i wouldn’t really like other just acquaintances to reach out just bc of the circumstances

b) i try to travel as much as possible, party all i can, tell everyone i love how much they mean to me and just. live

c) of course, i would be scared to death (see what i did there) but i wouldn’t have any other choice but to fully live my last month

43) What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

hard times by paramore!! it always makes me want to dance

44) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

no

45) How can I win your heart?

show any whatsoever interest in me lol

46) Can insanity bring on more creativity?

i guess,, i’m like the opposite of insanity though, i’m constantly numb and completely lacking any creativity, so it may work the other way too

47) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

hmm maybe my school application? i’m so fucking happy with my choice

48) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

hmm nothing too special i guess, just the usual loved and missed and so

49) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “heart.”

like the anatomy and stuff,,, i really like biology, more than romances lol

50) Basic question; what’s your favorite color/colors?

usually different shades of blue, but right now all pastel colors, especially purple

51) What is your current desktop picture?

my locked screen is two of my best friends, and my home screen is paramore ofc

52) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

trump would be pretty nice

53) What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

oh um like “name a few things you don’t like about me” or something, bc as i said, i hate conflicts

54) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

the ability to change the probability!!! it’s the ultimate superpower!!!

55) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

my tøp concert maybe? i was really euphoric then, and i haven’t really felt like that since, but i’m afraid i’ll destroy that memory if i could go back so idk

56) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

i’ve had quite a happy life yet, there’s no big thing i’d like to erase,, no i feel like every experience in my life has leaded me to where i am today, so i wouldn’t like to erase anything

57) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

hmm idk maybe alex turner. idk i feel like it would be pretty nice

58) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

italy maybe? my friends and i planned to go there this summer before the corona hit, so i’d like to go there lol

59) Ever been on a plane?

yeah several times

60) Give me your top 5 hottest celebrities.

idk idk i’m not really.. attracted to anyone rn? it’s kinda weird but there’s no one where i’m like wow this person is HOT,, nah i don’t really feel anything like that at the moment

[i-amthenugget]

long ass vent or something so read @ ur own risk

So we venting because I gotta type all this shit out so that I can get over it or something u know? Ok so. Vent undercut!

I had this friend who I never rlly felt like I could state my opinion with. They're rlly opinionated and a few times if I had an opinion they didn't agree with they would just not talk to me for like a day or two. We were in this group chat, and I'd be active in the group chat and I'd see them reading my texts and never responding despite them being one of the people who responded pretty normally most of the time. Obviously people can just be busy sometimes but it happened a lot after they disagreed with me and I feel like most of the time they were just ghosting me. So basically I agreed with them on a lot of things I didn't rlly agree on, and I'd put a lot of thought into some texts because some times I just didn't know what kind of things might make them ghost me. It honestly made me feel like shit a lot of the time and I never brought it up because what if they just ghosted me? And they're friends with a lot of my friends so I'm thinking "wow what if this makes them hate me, and then our friends decide they'd choose them over me, etc." and I didn't want to lose all my friends! Especially when we're all in college and don't see each other as much. Admittedly I should not have to worry that my friends will choose someone over me. But I'm anxious about it so I'm preparing for the worst. So I stay quiet about these things.

But a month or maybe a month and half ago, my mother volunteers me to babysit some kids. And I'm in the group chat like "I don't like kids why would I get volunteered for this, don't get me wrong I wouldn't be an asshole to kids but I'd like to avoid them." To which they disagree with me. Obviously they think it's pretty shitty of me to not like kids. I've gotten this a lot and I'm over it. I'm like. I'm not an asshole to kids. I think they're annoying and don't like looking after them and don't want any kids. But I know it's not they're fault their kids! I'm not gonna be rude to kids just because they're kids. But I still don't like them! I say this in the group chat but this friend ain't rlly having it so they don't talk to me for the day or whatever and I'm still going about my business like I normally would. But the time passes and I'm like. Nah fuck it. I'm sick of being ghosted. So in retaliation, I ghost them. I was like if ur gonna ghost me all the time I will simply ghost u back! And at the time I was upset with another friend in the group chat so I left the group chat. I didn't talk to the original friend at all, though I easily expressed my feelings to the other one and every thing was fine with them.

After a week this friend comes and dms me and apologizes for disagreeing with me about kids. This isn't the main reason I'm not talking to them, but they're actually apologizing and that's wild. As I said before they're rlly opinionated so I feel like they wouldn't often apologize for having different opinions. So I go back to the group chat and everything's fine for like a day.

But then they're just not responding to anything for awhile. I'm thinking. Well I didn't do anything wrong.... must be a personal problem? They're posting on their Snapchat story that they're crying a ton and so I dm them I'm like. "Hey idk how to show u I rlly do care about u other than saying I think u should talk to someone." I'm rlly trying to help! But they snap at me in response! They're like "what makes you think I'm not talking to people" and I'm really trying to be more open with them so I let them know, I say I feel like they aren't usually the kind of person to talk about what's bothering them and they tell me they are talking to people and I'm like. Ok then. Sorry for trying u know??? And then they go back to not saying anything.

A few days pass and they go in the group chat accusing me and another friend of vaguing about them on twitter. They had posted something about kpop fans never shutting up on their tumblr, and around that time I had posted on twitter saying that I never shut up about things way before I got into kpop. I had posted this because my dad was complaining about it and I was sick of it. But someone sent them an anon on tumblr saying that that's just how all fandoms are, and they thought I was the anon! So they stalked me on twitter (they never followed me so they wouldn't have seen my post otherwise) and concluded that I must've seen their tumblr post, sent them an anon, and then vagued about it on twitter. I don't follow them on tumblr so I didn't even see the post until they brought it up in the group chat.

But still they're accusing me of this. I tell them I wasn't vaguing about them, it was in fact about my family, etc. they're saying it's too much of a coincidence. But I didn't vague! So what am I gonna do?? I'm not gonna apologize because I blatantly didn't do anything? Not to mention they brought it up in the group chat. There were two other people in that group chat that had nothing to do with the whole situation, but this friend decided it was "their right to know the whole story" like. What? But they have nothing to do with it? But ok.

Anyway my other friend admits that she was vaguing, and they have their own argument, and then the original friend says we all need to change.

Like. I still never did anything wrong and I simply don't see how I need to change? So I say I have nothing to change and everything ends there and it's like. Ok awkward ig. But things eventually continue as normal in the group chat, except they seem to refuse to say almost anything to me.

A week passed and I'm like. I'm sick of this fr and I text them like "anyway do u hate me now??" And they're like "I don't hate u but I need some space and we both need to work hard but u said u don't need to change so it'll be awhile before we can become friends again" (ofc I am paraphrasing this all so take that how u will). I'm like. Wym I need to change? I didn't do anything wrong??? Ur the one who accused me of vaguing when I didn't??? Ur the one who ghosted all the time??? They're like "how was I supposed to know you weren't vaguing about me?" And "I was saying we all need to change so that we can all be more honest with each other and open with each other" like. Any time I wasn't honest with you I was just agreeing with you so that you wouldn't ghost me but okay I'm definitely one of the people at fault for not being able to trust each other. I STILL don't know what they mean "we need to be more open and honest with each other" like? Any other time I was open and honest with them??? But also they're like "you ghosted me for a week because we argued about kids" and then they accused me of saying they weren't important enough for me to think about! Okay I NEVER did that?? And I have a friend who agreed they don't remember me ever saying that. The most I might've said is "not everything's about you" harsh perhaps but! Not what they claimed I said. Not to mention I didn't ghost you for a week because of kids I ghosted you because I was sick of you ghosting me! But ok! Anyway they go on to say that "if we can't figure this out without fighting then we shouldn't be friends" Pretty much all I've done is defend myself against ur accusations and say I don't need to change because I don't. But like ok! I'm like. I never said you weren't important and I'm justified in my ghosting! They did that shit and just had everything go back to normal so many times I think I can be mad once okay. Im rlly like. U know what I've been a good friend??? And I don't think I need to change and this is ur loss. They're rlly like "I didn't say u weren't allowed to get mad but ur getting on my case for ghosting when u just did the exact same thing" like yeah me doing it once in retaliation to ALL the times you did it is definitely equal to u doing it over any disagreement..... ok! They were like "I've swallowed my pride and apologized" and I'm like. Honestly? U've hardly apologized u've been a shitty friend and I'm glad u think u need to change because u rlly fuckin do and I hope ur able to do that for ur friends in the future! So we ain't friends anymore and I'm not in that group chat!

But rlly y'all?? They're behavior was lowkey reminding me of this bitch of a toxic ass friend I had for a bit and due to the aftermath of that friendship I tried to kill myself so like?

But again the problem here is like. We still have mutual friends and I would never expect them to choose between us two or anything but. They've known each other a lot longer and I've never had friends for a long time due to having to move around a lot as a kid and stuff and I'm just sick of losing friends and being lonely y'all,

But I stood up for myself for once! jokes on me I stand up for myself one (1) time and everything goes to shit huh.

Anyway is this rant considering vaguing??? Smh they blocked me so I doubt they'd see it but. It's not vague enough to be vaguing and even if it was who cares I feel like I'm allowed to vent about it by now. On no I told all two followers about this, how terrible of me. 

 Perhaps im bitter,,, I'm going through it rn y'all