#what i find funniest of all is that these people are always like 'ugh i don't wanna discourse but this trann- trans woman is a bi lesbian'

[boymoding]

beyond dismal how people are still doing el gee bee tee quote unquote discourse in their mid twenties(!) during pride(!!) seemingly as their way of celebrating pride(?!?!?) fully posting about pansexuals or bi lesbians talking like they're nancy reagan or whatever. fuck off back to twitter you should spend pride month doing the one thing it was conceived for. which is giving trans girls rimjobs

[celaenaeiln]

What's the deal with fanon Tim bc I read some comics with Tim and I've seen him in cartoons but all I see people talk about is "haha coffee addicted nerd who doesn't sleep!" and that just seems weird and wrong. Like my view of Tim has always been "he's a nice and extremely smart guy who sometimes pushes things a bit too far and maybe a bit set in his own ways/Batman's ways" but now I'm not even sure of that because I really haven't read THAT much (mostly seen him in other series) lol

No you're right!! Anon you're so right!!!

What the heck is up with fanon Tim Drake??

The thing about him not sleeping is actually true though

Detective Comics (2016) Issue #937

Batman: Contagion Issue #11

(I agree with Catwoman, Tim is so cute)

So I understand where the coffee addiction in fanon comes from but Tim's not actually addicted to coffee in the comics. I actually don't recall him mentioning coffee at all. At some point he might have but if he did, then those instances are so little in the grand scheme of things it might as well be called negligible if it's trying to be called an addiction.

But more importantly, Tim is so much more than that!! My favorite Tim Drake aspect of him is how sassy and sarcastic he is, it makes him so endearing!!

UGH NO ONE APPRECIATES HOW MUCH OF A LITTLE SHIT HE IS!!

Robin (1993) Issue #58

CMON CMON CMON LETS TALK MORE ABOUT THIS!!

Tim, you little shit, you know exactly what they say - cause you did it!!

HIS SELF-SATISFIED SMILE!!!

In all honesty I find Tim the funniest of the entire batfamily to read because he's so-he's so wholesomely quirky in a mean way. That's such as awkward way to describe it but reading his comics, you just can't get enough of them because he's just too funny!

At one point he has a massive fever and stuck underground with a bunch of weird kids and one of the girls is just like "please get better, please get some rest!" as she's wiping away his sweat and Tim has like no breath or energy at this point. But with the last remains of will power, he uses his breath to push one last question between lips.

Robin (1993) Issue #70

And as the audience waits in baited anticipation we get this-

Robin (1993) Issue #70

It's actually a very valid question and shows his detective thinking and yada yada yada but THE COMEDIC GOLD OF HIS TIMING!!

Like his situation and his question there's a massive gap that's almost incomprehensible about it all which is why it's so fantastic!!

The way he sasses batman is top 5 fav moments with him.

Azrael: Agent of the Bat Issue #91

Thanks @paladin-of-nerd-fandom65 for finding it again <33

But Tim overall is just like a normal kid. He's what authors tried to do with Stephanie but failed. They were able to make him relatable to the audience because the way he acts, it's so quirky but funny. Yes, he's a boy detective genius but he likes messing with people, he likes solving crime, he likes hanging out with his big brother, he asks for relationship advice, he can get insecure, he can get upset without acting cold, he gets tired, he gets anxious, he's determined, and he's super dorky.

Robin (1993) Issue #25

Like really dorky.

But what I think really defines him is this panel

Robin (1993) Issue #48

This scene is probably what explains him best. Tim is someone who ponders a lot. He thinks constantly all the time whether it's about cases or his personal life, he just goes over the choices he makes constantly because he's just soul-searching alot.

He always means well even if he's awkward about it and he's just a diverse personality overall. The fanon interpretation of his character doesn't really do him any justice because it doesn't address how funny he is or confused or just a likeable, real person in general.

[suzukiblu]

For your ask game, what’s your favorite thing you’ve ever written?

. . . god I don't even know, man, that's a LOT of things, hahaha. And like, that answer definitely changes depending on the day/year/phase of the moon. So you're getting a couple answers here! Also I'm gonna keep this mostly to DC and only include finished fics, because me picking between WIPs would take a thousand years and also probably kill us all, lol (ignore the fact that a couple of these fics have sequels in-progress right now, STILL COUNTS OKAY??).

everything happens for a reason. sometimes that reason is that you are stupid and make bad decisions. is one of the funniest fucking things I've ever written, full stop. Lex is SO fun to write, seriously, I could write him all fucking DAY.

I'm really proud of blondes really do have more fun, both because of how much it seems to have affected/touched people who read it and because I think it was my first experience with writing gender euphoria as a major thing and writing, like, an actual explicit trans narrative? Like, I definitely wrote genderfuckery and implications and metaphors before that and probably even some trans characters, arguably, but that's the first story I really remember deliberately just making about being TRANS. And also holy shit, man, did I ever love writing gender euphoria for the first time, especially because I'd mostly only seen gender DYSphoria as a focal point in other stories and it just didn't/doesn't resonate with me the same way. I'm not trans because everything else makes me miserable, I'm trans because that's what makes me HAPPY. I don't remember if I was intentionally thinking that at the time, but that's the story I wanted to write for that one.

one day this will all be yours and you found me when no one else was looking are both concepts I love and found really cathartic to write and was very pleased to finish. I love that they're sort of "families of choice" fics about, like, actual BIOLOGICAL families (like, in the context of the fics, anyway), which probably sounds weird but is a concept I'm sort of painfully fascinated by--like, about the fact that you CAN choose your family, obviously, but sometimes you're lucky enough to find out that you had someone worth choosing already and just didn't necessarily know it, or to both grow into people who CAN choose each other even if you had problems or lashed out due to outside traumas or didn't always understand each other. That's, like, very personally relevant and meaningful to me, the idea that maybe the thing that got all fucked-up and the choices you made when you didn't fully understand the consequences of them can still be worked through and repaired and made into something new and better.

Also, special mention because this one is back a few fandoms but zero humble on it: best friends means you get what you deserve is just really, really good, and I did GOOD on it, hah. I took a three-word prompt/concept and turned it into 17k of "hey, doesn't this make more sense for why this character is the way he is, and isn't this what the main character actually wanted??" in genre-savvy explanation of why the sidekick character might stick around for the antisocial asshole hero and seem perfectly happy to base their life largely around them no matter how said hero treats them, and then I made the Consequences(tm) happen to Jaskier and Geralt, both bad AND good. I am just SO dang proud of that one, UGH I love it. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ FRIENDSHIP, AND THE CONSEQUENCES THEREOF.

[ghcstao3]

Read the other two Sleep Talker!Soap x Burglar!Ghost and need to finish this trilogy or something.

So, three years or so of dating and Ghost finally proposes. He’s cleaned up his act, stop robbing shit, works a full time successful job, and Roach is doing pretty good too!

They’re doing great! Except, as the wedding date gets closer he feels bad that he hid his burglar past and decides to confess before the wedding, giving Soap an out.

He pushes it off for so long it’s nuts. After a long day they settle into their bed in their apartment and try to sleep. Ghost lays awake for 20 mins staring at the ceiling before Soap says something.

“Something in your mind, Si?”

Ghost sighs, he doesn’t want to but knows he should.

“For a long time, including the job before my current one, I wasn’t actually working to make money…”

Soap sits up and looks down at him curiously, “don’t tell me you were an assassin or something.”

“What…”

“Cause that’s super hot and it totally wouldn’t change anything-“

Ghost sat up too, putting a hand over Soap’s mouth, he continued.

“No, I didn’t kill people. I-ugh I was a burglar. Roach was my partner.”

Soap removed the hand from his mouth and held it in his lap.

“Ok, that doesn’t change anything. I still love you and want to marry you.”

Ghost groaned again. That was the EASY part. He knew for a fact Soap would be understanding and kind, but finding out that Ghost was going to rob HIM was questionable. Soap either dies laughing or kills him.

“Si, what’s this leading to? Did you steal something you shouldn’t and now you have this insane price on your head and have to run away with me?”

Simon chuckles to himself, he can always count on Johnny to make him feel better.

“No, just- we didn’t meet how you think we did. No don’t give me that look, let me finish. The first time I met you, you were asleep. I was robbing your place, going through your room when you started talking. Said all this crazy shit about ‘its going to eat you’ and like ‘leave or die’. Then you just shot up from the bed, pointed to a shadow, said something in Gaelic, and collapsed back in bed. I put everything back and left because I was CONVINCED you were possessed. Then you showed up at the hardware store that I get my supplies and I was kinda afraid of you. You asked me out and told me about that dream that wasn’t actually a dream and I thought for sure you knew it was me, but you never said anything so I didn’t say.”

Johnny squeezed Simon’s hand tight, his head was bent down and his shoulders trembled. Simon was sure he was about to be kicked out, making his own fiancé cry! What kinda man was he!

Then Johnny fell backwards, howling with laughter. Tears in his eyes and hands wrapped around himself, side clenching hard with laughter.

Simon just looks at him, stunned. Johnny eventually calms down and beckons Simon to him. Simon lays down on his side next to Johnny.

“Simon, I think that is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. This doesn’t change anything and I still would love to be your husband. Nothing, even being a cool assassin or dumb robber with a price on his head, will change that.”

Simon smiles “I feel like you’re disappointed that I’m not an assassin more than me not telling you about this.”

Johnny laughs and turns onto his side, burying himself into Simon’s chest. “Nah, you’re still pretty cool. This explains a lot actually.”

Simon shifts, “what?”

“Simon, nobody carries around a lockpicking set.”

“Oh yeah, keep talking shit. We’ll see who’s laughing the next time you get locked out and I’m not home.”

Johnny gasped, “I never said it was a bad thing! Besides, that look on your face when you get the door open is super hot. You do this whole smirk to yourself thing and I’ll admit that after the first time, the next three times I lost my keys were on purpose.”

Simon laugh and hugged Johnny right, “Whatever, go to sleep weirdo.”

“Right back at you, hottie.”

Simon snorted and they relaxed. Johnny quickly drifting off to sleep. Yeah, Simon had no idea what he was worried about.

He never had anything to worry about, really.

Johnny’s understanding, always has been, and of course he’d be about this, too. He understands Simon just needed to make ends meet somehow, and given that Simon has since given up robbing, it helps his case just a little more.

It doesn’t stop Johhny from asking a million questions a day after he finds out, though. Or making jokes at Simon’s expense. Or ganging up on Simon with Roach because apparently it’s hilarious, or something.

Oh well. It’s a funny enough story to tell, and now that Simon has long since gotten used to Johnny’s sleep talking tendencies, he supposes a little teasing is better than having ruined what he’s built up with Johnny.

-

what a lovely. Silly conclusion (also!! everyone make sure to say thank you @snootlestheangel for the initial idea!! and go look at her post!!)

[markosbabymama]

The outsiders x a reader that is taller+ stronger than them?

|| the outsiders reacting to a tall strong reader ||

darry curtis:

doesn’t mind at all that ur tall!

he honestly loves that ur tall, thinks that it’s the prettiest thing ever

loves having a gf that’s his height.

darry’s a giant so obvi when he met u he got so excited.

it was so hard to find a girl that didn’t look like an ant compared to him LOL

he loves giving u forhead kisses, especially because he doesn’t have to break his back to do so LMAO

also doesn’t mind that ur strong

he loves cause you can do things for yourself, and offer to help him with stuff time to time.

loves to hug u from behind. his favorite thing ever.

overall loves you the way you are. 🫶🏻

.

.

dallas winston:

Dallas winston has the biggest ego ever, especially about his height. 

so when he saw you for the first time, his ego was a lil bruised lol.

even tho you’re only 3 inches taller then him, he still got aggervated.

would literally roll his eyes when he saw you, THATS HOW INTIMIDATED HE WAS.

the guys would tease him so much about it.

“aw, whats wrong dally? you made cus’ y/n’s taller than you? don’t go cryin’ now.” “shut the fuck up randle.”

learns to love you for it tho.

tbh dally definitely makes those shitty tall jokes

like, how’s the weather up there?, giraffe, jolly green giant.

loves when you cuddle.

he will literally slip into your arms and knock out in two seconds.

.

.

sodapop curtis:

thinks your height is absolutely beautiful!!

he doesn’t mind at ALL that ur tall.

he loves forhead kisses.

literally has his arm wrapped around ur waist 24/7.

LOVES to hug/cuddle, literally loves them.

soda is clingy so obviously he’s gonna be be ur side 24/7

also dosent mind that you’re strong

you’re his little partner at the dx, no matter what it is he’ll ask u to help him

and when u get insecure about ur height, he will shut it down immediately

“y/n, there’s no reason to be sad about being tall. you’re height is beautiful and so are you.” *kisses ur cheek*

cutie 🥹

.

.

steve randle:

he was definitely intimidated by ur height, especially cus he’s a short king.

wouldn’t show it like dallas, but definitely got aggervated by it sometimes.

but he honestly never tried to make you feel bad or make jokes or anything, steve wouldn’t do that to his girl.🫶🏻

you definitely ruffle his hair to get him mad

“hi steve!” *ruffled hair* “aw that ain’t funny man, stop fuckin up my hair.”

he doesn’t mind that you’re strong tho.

honestly loves it

he loves to help you out with shit even tho ur strong, he’ll just do it to show off lol

he’ll definitely vent abt not being as tall as the other boys to you, he gets insecure a lot.

“steve hon, just cause you’re not as tall as everyone else doesn’t mean a thing. you’re still a very good man, and very handsome too.” *kisses his cheek*

LOVESSSS when u kiss his neck.

he will melt when you wrap ur arms around him and kiss his neck n collerbones.

UGH i love steve.🫶🏻

.

.

johnny cade:

honestly johnny would not care about height or strength, just wants a loving relationship.

sometimes he’ll blush a lil when u wrap ur arms around him, or kiss his forehead lol

loves holding onto u.

this boy will hold onto ur hand, or arm for dead life. no matter where you are.

thinks you’re beautiful and amazing the way u are.

thinks it’s funny how much people get intimidated by u LOL

only thing he gets insecure about is that he feels he can’t protect himself, and he thinks that he’s weak compared to you.

but u constantly reassure him that it’s definitely not like that, and that he’s not weak and that u love him for him.🫶🏻

loves when you run ur hands threw his hair for sure.

loves hugging as well.

.

.

two bit matthews:

isn’t too bothered about it

definitely wishes he was taller then you, but doesn’t let it get to him too much.

always asks for piggy back rides cause he’s mentally 9

thinks it’s the funniest thing to make a tall joke

his jokes are already corny so imagine what the tall ones would be.

loves that ur strong.

he always invites u to rumbles to help the gang out. thinks it’s so hot cause u can defend urself without a man’s help. LOL

if anyone says shit abt ur height he’s getting on their ass bro

he will NOT tolerate y/n slander.

pulling that switch blade out SO MF QUICK.

loves you and ur height so much.

.

.

ponyboy curtis:

definitely pressed the first couple times he saw u.

pony is scrawny and short for his age, so when he saw that you were 5 inches taller and stronger then him, he lost his shit ngl.

pony tries so very to be macho, so obvi he’s not gonna show how he feels. but it boiled on the inside for a good week LMFAO

ur height grows on him and he definitely ignores it after a while

so when ppl bring up ur height he’s kinda like “tf u talkin bout bro” then remembers ur tall and is like OOHH

but he won’t let anyone talk shit about u

especially socs

“what’s up with that broad y/n?, she’s taller then half those bums.” “why does it bother you any,? you mad a girl is taller than you? sounds pretty sad to me man.”

HAHAHA

but srsly pony grows to luv ur height

and the forhead kisses u give him heheh 🤭

A/N: okay guys this wasn’t that good but again this is my second time writing ff aND i’m on vacay rn so it’s kinda hard to write rn but hope u enjoy!

[shock]

my favorite things to come out of 'he fucked that old man' are - people who think that referencing harry potter at all is a crime even when you're razzing on it and get weirdly mad when they find out it came from a harry potter post and are like "UGH its such a shame this ICONIC post is a HARRY POTTER REFERENCE" like it could possibly be better as anything else - the same people making their own versions to "reclaim" it by making their own posts with characters who will never be what snape and dumbledore are. it just doesnt hit when dumbledore was a wizard over 100 years old. its so fucking funny - finding a new way to immortalize the act of spoiling that snape kills dumbledore bc it has always been one of the funniest early internet trolling activities to partake in

-the fact that it was a post in smarmy protest of the new tumblr censor rules at the time like it was only made because people were getting banned left and right for nothing and i thought it was so funny to pretend i could go down for saying a book spoiler from 2005

-my friend tuesday trapped in screenshots with me forever :)

[shirefantasies]

do you have a fave member of the company and of the fellowship? if so, who and why?

⭐️⭐️⭐️

Oh ho ho! Well I’m glad it isn’t too overly obvious 😉 as far as the fellowship goes I’m a big Pippin girlie! From the company I love Ori so much, such a sweetheart and I love non traditional masculine characters every single time! And innocent cinnamon rolls are my kryptonite. I just love him! Bofur, he’s just so adorable and heartwarming and goofy and ahhh! Plus his early exchange with Bilbo is so iconic. “Think furnace with wings.” To quote what my personal blog @spacemanxpaninis has on its page about all my favorite characters:

On Pippin-

“My childhood fictional character crush! …that kinda carried into adulthood… I’m a sucker for humor and adorable innocent dorks, plus Pippin is extremely neurodivergent-coded and it does my clumsy screw-up heart good to see a clumsy screw-up type character. But you know what? Pippin is a hero. He overcomes so much and matures a lot and he’s not perfect, but that’s part of why I love his character. He’s different from all the other unique figures and has a heart of gold, but doesn’t always know how to use it. He wants to help and it breaks his heart that people around Pippin think otherwise and that in turn breaks MY heart. He’s just the cutest, sweetest man and I want to make him happy forever. Plus PLEASE that scene at Sam’s wedding I WILL maintain that is the funniest thing that happens in those movies darnit he is HILARIOUS. That and mission…quest…thing. Iconic. Who is doing it like him.”

On Sweet Ori-

“It kinda kills me how little screen time we got of each dwarf from The Hobbit because of sheer numbers and how much screen time they wanted to give to bigger names mostly the line of Durin. Because here we have dear sweet Ori, canonically in the movies the youngest company member and one of the most polite, this young scribe finding his courage alongside his big brother on a quest to reclaim a homeland he’s never even been to. Yes, more patterns, another cinnamon roll. I never said I had no blorbo type ok? I just adore Ori’s innocence but also the way he balances having traditional dwarf interests with other things like his art, writing, knitting, and such. He doesn’t entirely conform to his people’s standards, but seemingly isn’t too outcast for that either and I find that to be a high word of the dwarrow. Ori is just a little sunshine character for me that always makes me happy :) I wish others appreciated him more too!”

On Bofur:

I mean come on, everyone loves Bofur right??? If not THEY SHOULD! Like, his whole thing is being lovable come on. One of the most unique designs among the dwarves, Bofur looks far different from the stereotype and that’s a wonderful element of ‘not all of any given people look the same’ plus it makes him stand out even more. Bofur is such a comfort character- you know he gives the warmest hugs EVER and he holds you for as long as he can. Bonus points for being one of the first to really welcome Bilbo because he’s just that kind and accepting of a person, someone who would take a lot to really dislike somebody. Beyond being kind he’s also a great listener AND a great party companion, the epitome of ‘get you a man who can do both’ as equal gusto goes into dancing and singing and being with the people he loves and being there for them too. I just know he would be the best dad too ugh.

Lomls fr thanks for letting me rant and plug my personal blog anon 😉🥰

[runespoor7]

Re: What would one of Jiang Cheng's incarnations react to transmigrating into him after reading mdzs?

Dealer's choice! Maybe they're all alive. Maybe everyone who survived/died in canon did the same in transmigrator!JC's home reality. Maybe it's the reverse. Maybe they're all dead. Whatever you think is most interesting!

Hmm. Hm. I don't think a lot about transmigration AUs (I get sad/confused about the transmigrators/transmigratees), so lemme think.

Okay I do know there 100% cannot be a JL or a JYL or anything that JC is responsible for back in the real world, because otherwise that man's main priority would be to go back.

If there's a WWX behind I think the funniest possibility is that that WWX manages to open a transdimensional portal and find JC - no dead/disappeared JC allowed! (Incidentally I would prefer if canon!JC and transmigrator!JC had swapped, so canon!JC can return and each pair of WWX-JC can talk it out)

I feel this goes against the spirit of transmigration AU 😔

Maybe it's about JC's failure to connect with the people he meets in mdzs, and he feels some dark satisfaction when he realizes that that's largely what people expect from him - aside from JL, canon!JC always kind of had that arm length aura of not wanting to get close (thanks WWX). He'd feel pretty sad and guilty about JL, though.

He might probably still do his best sect leadership wise, because these people are depending on him, but eeerrrrr he's not actually a sect leader. He leans on his disciples but it's frustrating how little he feels equipped to be in control of things. I think he tells them what's wrong with him after a while - the person that he's quickly learned was his SIC in all but name (because canon!JC never did name an actual SIC; transmigrator!JC would pretend that he's surprised, but no, he's not, canon!JC couldn't be more transparent if he'd tried, this is embarrassing), a couple others.

I think one of them probably involves WWX. Their Sect Leader isn't their sect leader, okay. They've lost their sect leader and they need him back, and who do you go to when you're familiar with Jiang Wanyin and faced with the impossible?

So WWX and his husband come crashing into LP. (the person who sells the secret out is fully prepared to grovel and/or be exiled once canon!JC is back. if that's the price to pay, so be it, it will be shouldered gladly! (LWJ develops an unexpected kinship for that person. the person in question doesn't care, but that only serves to make LWJ like them more.))

It's WWX! It's a lot! ...for transmigrator!JC who has a falling-out with the WWX in his world back then, and ugh WWX is just so WWX, and also JC did read mdzs, and he knows exactly how WWX feels about canon!JC! How could he not! It's laid out plainly in the book! Every petty resentment, every unkind thought, every intent of WWX to misunderstand canon!JC and only ever see him through the most unflattering lens, culminating in the worst "it's not me, it's you"-- sorry, he means "it's not me, it's that my debt toward your family is repaid and you really really really don't owe me anything more if you would just kindly let me go and get out of my life forever" of all times. So transmigrator!JC is kind of very annoyed at WWX, and he doesn't have the best temper.

It comes out one day, when WWX starts one too many sentences about canon!JC and cuts him off with a sigh and a shake of his head, like he's so disappointed in canon!JC, but not surprised. Transmigrator!JC ends spills the secret of the golden core like poison, turning it into a weapon to stab WWX verbally with. It's cruel but JC means it to be cruel. Canon!JC would have died without letting WWX know the truth, too bad, canon!JC isn't there anymore, all there is a tired transmigrator who frankly dgaf.

and then, I suppose, they switch back.

[illarian-rambling]

Thanks for the tag @nczaversnick!

OC Mega Questionaire

Random number generator suggests Djek :)

Five things that make you happy:

I mean, money in my pocket. That's like, the main one. A hopped-up party is probably second, with a crowd of rich drunks to follow. I guess after that... card games? Oh, and my friends! Can't forget those losers.

If you could save just one other person who would it be?

I... Am I an idiot if I say Tyche? She betrayed me, left me for dead. I doubt she- I doubt she ever cared about me in the first place. But I wish she could've. I wish she could've been better.

Tell us one of your funniest jokes:

Why does the sea roar? Well, you'd be hollering too if you had crabs on your bottom.

Where would you like to visit?

Oh, tough question. I've really been around, you know? Hit up most of the big cities - I don't got much use for hiking bullshit. If I could go anywhere, I think I'd pick Seluthena. Yeah, yeah, it's underwater, but there's magic. Sepo talks about it sometimes, and it sounds pretty. Plus, I want to see if all sirens are such hard asses.

When do you usually go to sleep?

Uhhh.... Probably three? Don't get on my ass about it, ok?

Are you a jealous person?

Totally not. I'd never be jealous of someone when I can steal whatever fancy digs they've got instead. ...I guess I used to be kinda jealous of Twenari’s sorcery when we first met, but she'll use it better than I ever would.

Have you committed a crime?

Seriously? I'm not gonna dignify that with an answer.

Do you have a chore you usually hate?

Ugh, what chore don't I hate? Laundry is probably my least favorite. Remembering to fold it feels like pokers in my brain.

Tell me an embarrassing childhood story

Ok, ok, ok, this is a good one. So, some of the bigger street kids were chasing me - I had some food they wanted and this one teen, Miks, just had it out for me anyways after he found me sleeping in this drain pipe he liked. They chased me all the way up into this warehouse, so I figured I'd hide, yeah? I jumped into the nearest crate only to find, oh shit, it's full of flour. It's getting all up in my nose and mouth, and I just know I'm gonna sneeze any second now, but the other kids are in the building. That's when I had my glorious idea. I stagger up outta the flour, groaning like some unholy spirit and waving my hands all menacingly. I conjured up some shadows and all those kids started screaming like nothing else, thinking I was an actual ghost. Miks even pissed himself! Course, they caught on a second later and beat the ever-loving snot out of me, but I kept looking up at that stain on Miks' leg and giggling the whole time. ...Ah memories.

Are you a good person?

I try. I know I've failed in my past, and I'll fail again in the future, but I still try as best I can. I think that counts for something, right?

What’s the worst thing you have ever done? Do you regret it?

I let a little girl watch her mom get beaten to a pulp in front of her eyes. I let my best friend be taken by a demon she'd spent her whole life fighting. I killed an evil man and stopped him from doing an evil thing, but I still wonder late at night if he could've been redeemed. I regret all three.

What’s the quickest way to make you laugh?

Heh, tell me a dirty joke, and I'll probably be on the floor.

What is your favorite song right now?

The Kindly Vixen. It always has and it always will be a visionary among bad bar songs.

Do you sometimes wish to be someone else?

Oh, every day, my friend. I don't usually mean it, but yeah, every day.

Do you push forward or take time to rest?

What, do you think I'm some sort of soldier type? Some expert mage who stays up too late and doesn't remember to eat her breakfast? Nah, I take it easy when I can because who knows when the next opportunity will come around.

What is your favorite drink?

Dryuenya tyri. It's sweeter than regular tyri, and people usually mix it with cherry juice.

If you had to pick an item of clothing or accessory to wear for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Shit, maybe a bandana? It's a pretty versatile piece. Or, wait, maybe glasses would be more practical. Damn, I wish I had glasses.

If you were forced to forget one memory, what would you choose?

One of those hungry street nights. They all run together anyways.

What is a positive thing your worst enemy would say about you?

I'm a determined little bastard, I'll tell you what. I'd like to think even my enemies can appreciate just how many times I get back up after taking a beating.

I'll tag @dragonedged-if @pluppsauthor @watermeezersworldofkaldria @wyked-ao3 @uraniumwriting and anyone else who wants in :)

[unorthodox-oblivion]

Lost :P

Thank you for the ask @obsessivedaydreamer and @eponine119 who also asked for LOST

TV ASK TIME

Favorite episode and why

I don't really have one. It's always switching around between one of Kate's or one of Jack's or one of Sawyer's or one of Juliet's. I can't really pick one. But yeah, it's a switcharoo of one of those. They're some of my favorite characters and I like getting more character development for them, that's the main reason.

2. Funniest/crackiest/it’s-terrible-but-I-still-love-it episode/scene

Oh I love the scene with the glasses. Even seeing the gif on my feed gets me laughing and makes my days better. The disgust in Sawyer's face, the way Kate teases him, the tone Jack uses (that I can't even hear in the gifs, except in my head it's so clear), my god... lol

3. It’s-terrible-and-I-hate it episode/scene

To not go with Exposé, the Fire + Water episode. Ugh.

4. Best episode/scene for my favorite character

This is probably the hardest question, but either Tabula Rasa or Eggtown. At least right now. Ask again tomorrow and it might change lmao

5. Best episode/scene for my favorite ship

the scene where Kate catches Jack reading to Aaron and they make out after lol nah. I really, really like their first kiss. There's a lot to unpack there, but it had me squealing because I didn't see it coming.

6. Best episode/scene for a particular supporting character

Define supporting character lol

For Lost that's kind of hard, because a lot of the "main" cast feel like supporting characters more than main characters, even though the names of the cast pop up in alphabetic (last name) order to insinuate that they'd have roughly the same amount of relevance and screen time which is untrue since most of it falls to the A-team. And then sometimes I find myself thinking of some characters as supporting characters even though, technically, they're main characters. You know what I mean? ugh.

And I don't really like the characters that are ACTUAL supporting characters. But to go for like a side-side-side (more of a side, than a supporting really) character, I really like the post-rescue scene of Kate and Cassidy together talking about Sawyer.

7. Best episode/scene for a character I don’t usually like

Any scene between Sharon and Sayid. He made her character more interesting and more bearable for me.

8. Most visually beautiful or interesting episode/scene

Aside from that shot of Sun on the beach? lol God... the pilot. The pilot has incredible shots. Most of season 1 does, really, but the pilot is outstanding.

9. Most emotionally affecting episode/scene

Idk. I wasn't really... moved by any episodes (the friend that got me watching the show was so mad at me for actually being happy when a few people died lol) but... I guess the scene where Kate leaves Aaron behind, not because of the scene itself but because I couldn't help but picture the hell that kid would have to go through in the morning, even though she had told him who Carole was. She was still all he knew and the poor thing would be heartbroken.

10. Most powerful use of music in an episode/scene

Make your own kind of music as a season opener. Period.

11. Episode/scene that changed my perspective on the show

I don't think there was one other than the pilot. I watched the show cuz I made a trade with a friend. He would watch my comfort show, I would watch his. (I've done my part ¬¬) So I guess the pilot? I thought I was gonna hate it and I loved it and I couldn't stop watching the show.

12. Episode/scene where the acting stands out

Gosh, anything with Michael Emerson? His character frustrates me but he plays everything so well. There is so much subtlety to his acting that you notice especially on gifs or upon a rewatch.

13. Overall best-written episode

The Constant.

[ddejavvu]

(the anon is me) Honestly, when I saw the discussion, I HAD TO JOIN sjsjsj so tyty

I get that- honestly, the only reason I got into kpop was because my cousin forced me at first because I was obsessed with Motionless In White and she wouldn't let me come over until I learned everything about BTS so I had to put that obsession on pause for BTS . So, I did and learned I actually did like their music so far! I mean, I'd prefer to have found them on my own but I mean, at least I get to say I was there from the "beginning" sjsjsj (not saying that being there since the beginning is more important or anything, it's just nice to find people surprised when I tell them.). but honestly, happy for you that you found your ults <33 and SAME, love them <33 I just got into Monsta X so please, anything you'd like to share, I'd love to hear???

LITERALLY WHAT I'M SAYING. Some people in fandoms become so toxic, even to others in the fandoms. How about the fans that believe you aren't fans unless you can remember every members birth-date, blood type, place of origin, etc. LIKE I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY OWNNNN. I get wanting to know about them because they're your idol or whatever your reason may be but you don't gotta hassle others about it, others aren't obligated to know such information and plus, some are multi stans, such as myself, and literally can't harbor ALL that knowledge. We are NOT spencer reid sjsjsj- NGL twitter stans scare me sometimes but some are absolutely lovely. But I still keep my distance like you do, better safe than sorry. But the tiktok edits are always something else LMAO the amount I've seen posting the funniest shit ever of the idols really make my day. (I will now send you some when I see them, if you're cool with that-) and I block people who do fanwar stuff. I just think everyone has their own taste and if you don't like anothers, you don't have to say anything, just leave it alone and block the person if it bothers you so much.

SOWJOIJSOIJ stahop you're literally so sweet, thank you <333 I barely meet any metalhead kpop stans T-T to be honest, when i see other metalhead pages, most of the time in their DNI is just Kpop stans and I'm literally making the ಠ_ಠ face cause dude, why so mad?

YOU'RE SO REAL FOR THAT sjsjsjs Honestly, I saw Hobi and was like, yes. HIM. and to see how far they've come WARMS my heart. But the enlistment always got me on my toes.

LMFAOO my bsf showed me chewing gum by nct dream and shine by pentagon and i was hooked.. but yes i definitely know what you mean!! ugh yes mx is so so so good i really recommend their series that they did called 'puppy days' (?) it's just them hanging out with puppies for the day and they literally have to nap halfway through the day bc they're so tired LMFAOO - it's so cute!! that's my favorite piece of mx media hehe

don't get me started on fans that gatekeep FROM OTHER FANS.. i'm really really bad at remembering dates so like kim mingyu my love!! i'm sorry but i don't have enough space in my brain to remember your birthday and my mom's birthday, and only my mom will be upset if i don't </3 you literally won't know </3 i always see their posts about it and silently wish them a happy birthday but like i do not always remember and that is okay!! ugh or people that scold you for not streaming mvs.. babe i have a big girl job and i go to big girl school i do not have time to stream an mv!! i am going to listen to the song if i like the song.

i think a big component of internet drama like that is age/maturity.. i'm not saying that every young person is immature and every older person is mature but like,, even just looking at my 15 year old self is so different in terms of maturity and i would have totally engaged in stupid pointless fanwars just to be right on the internet.. now i don't even fight with people on the internet for good reason lmfao i just block and scroll and it's SO BENEFICIAL to my life

not the dni... people get so creative with those omg i feel like mine is just generic lmfao - it astounds me to see some of them!! i don't necessarily think it's a bad thing, they're just curating their online experience like they're supposed to, but it is interesting to see everyone's preferences laid out in the open like that bc i'm not used to it

YES i love bias-at-first-sight <3 aw yeah i know that's coming up soon!! i wish you the best <3

[emodennis]

Always Sunny podcast was top-tier today. They talk about the ep longer than usual. They talk about starting S16 and writing processes. They talk about having to play gay stereotypes on The Job. Glenn and Megan spill some tea on assholes in other sets/shows. Glirst is also achieved. Ugh I want to hope we get this level of commentary for S5E1. Btw, would you by any chance be able to clip some of this ep if you have time? (Sorry for asking!)

hi anon! thanks for the ask :) i just finished watching the podcast.

i read your message before i watched it and for a sec i thought you meant they talk about playing gay stereotypes as mac and dennis in the episode kjashdakjh but i for sure thought it was interesting that rob said he plays mac at a 0/10 (on the stereotype scale)... becauuuuseeeee well idk. i go back and forth about whether or not i like his characterization after he comes out. i think he maybe meant that his choices were specific to mac's character (but sometimes happen to be stereotypes). because there are plenty of gay people who display stereotypical gay behavior. so idk. i just wouldn't call it a 0. (i know that's not what your ask was about but i had Thoughts).

see i wasn't as interested in the episode commentary this ep, just because it's probably in my bottom 20. i don't hate it but like they said about a lot of people, it's not in my top rotation, for exactly the reasons rob said (i don't like departures as much). BUT on episodes i do really like, i LOVE the commentary. so YES i hope they go that in depth about mortgage crisis!!!

i loooved hearing what they shared about the writing process (and i wanted more!!). tell me all the terms and the steps and all of it!! i hope they continue to share tidbits as they write :)

hmm i'm not sure what you wanted me to clip. as i was watching the episode i was thinking what i wanted to clip but there wasn't anything that rly stood out to me. i usually clip stuff that's either gay/macdennis related, cute/interesting glenn moments, or really funny jokes. the episode got maybe 4 or 5 laughs out of me but none of them were really big laughs, so this episode is not going on my favorite episode list :( (i prioritize what's funniest. idk that's what i like). (btw i just screen record youtube on my phone so if u have a clip u want to post it's rly easy).

i did find glenn's story about not taking shit from a director funny. i mean i find any time he's dramatically angry funny. *sighs dreamily*

anyway thanks for your thoughts and for giving me an opportunity to share my thoughts!

[matildashoney]

I’m back bestie 🤭 sorry it took so long, I’m the worlds slowest reader lol but I can proudly say I am just as invested in Harry and Hera as I am Harry and Ames (and that is saying A LOT) but you’re just that good! Also, prepare for a long novel, just like you gave us 😘

The way you wrote this beginning scene of them wrapped up together in bed makes me so soft and cozy. Our house. Still not over it. And the smut. Ugh. As always, perfect perfect perfect.

Isla waiting on the front steps lmao and her saying Harry is stealing her like girlfriend isn’t about to get married 😂 also, not me forgetting Hera’s first name is actually June whoops. Hera saying she thinks her and Grant are fine, but I have a feeling those not so fine feelings of his are about to come OUT. I love love love Hera and Isla’s friendship. I need that 🥹

Bad Bunny! Go Hera!! Also, why do I feel like Grant is going to say something to Harry and then shit is gonna go down….and maybe not even intentionally or maliciously, but I just feel it. I am happy to see that he is so happy for her though!

I am so sad that that moment with Harry on stage was ruined by that phone call. He is always there at the right time and is so so good to her. Her chosen family the just the best 😭

I’m scared to know what will happen when Harry finds out she’ll be touring with Bad Bunny and not him…And her thinking she’ll tell him at the wedding. I just know grant will say something…. Watch me be wrong 🤪

That speech was SO good 😭 and the hug after 😭 and the way Harry supports her 😭

God I fucking knew it!! What an asshole…but I’m so glad it didn’t cause the stir that I know grant wanted (and that I thought). They are so perfect together and their communication during this is just pure love and respect.

I need to get drunk with Hera 😂 she’s so funny and Harry is so sweet on her. And her continually asking if he’s still mad at her lol

That secret is so sad…that she’d miss her best friends wedding bc seeing Harry with another girl would absolutely break her

I like your nose ajsjdbns same, Hera. They are the actual dream. I love them as much as they love each other ♥️

MY LOVE! MY NOVELIST LOVE! (I NEED TO START TAGGING YOU AS NOVEL ANON SO I CAN COME BACK AND READ YOUR SWEET COMMENTS ALL THE TIME! I HOPE THAT'S OKAY!) OKAY, HERE ARE ALL MY THOUGHTS ON YOUR THOUGHTS.

you are literally the sweetest ever. i was always really afraid coming out of the harry and ames high that i wouldn't ever make people as invested in a story as i had with theirs, and it makes me so happy that people are just as invested, if not more. totally makes my day.

you are so cute. in the initial outline for the chapter there was no smut, but something unholy happened to me and there we have it

isla is getting married but that doesn't mean harry can steal her best friend! she had her first! also, her first name is hera! she just introduces herself to most people as june because that's what her parents always called her. it's a bit of a long story, but i'm sure i'll write about it later on. only certain people call her hera: harry (and his family) and isla (and her family). yes, grant is "fine", so she says! hera and isla's friendship is something i want all of us to have. it's just so pure and sweet.

hera is living her best life with the best artists in the game. she deserves the world for all her hard work!

harry really knows how to comfort hera in those moments, more than anyone else ever could, i think.

your predictions! you were right!

isla's speech made me tear up a little, i can't lie to you.

harry definitely had to control himself more than he wanted to, for the sake of hera and keeping her calm. harry will have his moment with grant, don't you worry.

writing hera drunk was actually the funniest part of this chapter. like anything i thought she might say was written down. she was just spilling her guts the whole time.

hera was destroyed after the breakup. we, obviously, don't see much of it and i think people thought she was doing way better than she was because of everything with grant, but hera was so broken. it was one of the worst times for her.

the 'i like your nose' part came as a joke at first, but then i thought about how much he kisses her nose and she kisses his and it felt so real for her to be like, i just like your nose.

ah! i am so happy you loved the chapter, and i can't wait for you all to see what's coming with the next one.

also, i wonder if any of you got the easter egg / hint about where all the drama is going to go down in the middle of the story ...

[robininthelabyrinth]

3. I have no idea if this time line would work, but MYX and XY get attached to each other, so when the time comes that MYX and XY need to leave Koi Tower, JGY helps them get married in secret and run away to Dongu. Anyways, a few years latter, JGY has a kid that needs to go and people in a removed location that owe him favors! Isn’t that a wonderful combination! A Jin(?) Rusong raised by Uncles Mo and Xue, or whatever they go by these days, would be very chaotic. Bonus: they start a relatively safe demonic cultivation sect, maybe with some guidance from the Nie (has NMJ never been killed by the Jin in this Au?), or more specifically, Huaisang. SL and XXC who got a happy ending decide to check out this no blood line sect (it looks slightly dubious, but surely can’t be to bad! Right?) A-Qing at least is enjoying her new friend -🟪🦋

Should Have Been Listening - ao3

“Let go of me.”

“I won’t,” Mo Xuanyu said, clutching Xue Yang’s arm. “I won’t, I won’t! You’re my only friend here!”

Xue Yang looked down at him in what he thought was mostly exasperation, but might have also been a little fondness – after all, if it’d been anyone else who’d grabbed him, he’d have stabbed them.

He still didn’t know why he didn’t stab Mo Xuanyu, too, but in all honesty, he wasn’t that interested in exploring it. He did what he wanted, and right now, he didn’t want to murder Mo Xuanyu.

Irritating as he sometimes was.

“Little brat,” he said. “I have important business to go do.”

“It’s not something that he ordered, though!”

“So what?” Xue Yang bristled. “I don’t just do what hetells me!”

“But that means he won’t cover for you, and that means you’ll get in trouble!” Mo Xuanyu argued. “How can I let you go all alone to get in trouble? You have to take me with you! What will you do without me? Who’ll keep you entertained and sneak sweets for you if not for me?”

Xue Yang’s lips twitched. Okay, maybe there was a reason he kept the brat around.

“You don’t understand,” he said. “This is something I’ve got to do – something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. I’m going to kill a lot of people and get into a lot of trouble, more trouble than ever before. I’ll probably lose my life. How can I possibly take you with me?”

Mo Xuanyu scowled up at him. It was a very weak scowl – barely more than a pout. “You think that’s going to make me not want to come with you?”

Xue Yang’s eyebrows went up. “You cry at the sight of blood!”

“I cry at a lot of things!”

Xue Yang wasn’t sure how to respond to that. It was true, Mo Xuanyu cried at a lot of things.

“Maybe if I come with you, it won’t be so bad!”

Yeeeeah, Xue Yang wasn’t going to count on that.

“Or maybe you don’t have to go…?”

“I have to go,” he explained. “If I don’t go, I can’t get revenge, and I have to have revenge.”

Mo Xuanyu blinked up at him.

“I don’t really understand, but okay,” he said, and tugged on his arm. “Let’s go together, then. I promise I won’t cry!”

-

He cried.

He cried a lot.

-

“Stop fucking crying.”

-

“Just – ugh. Listen. You’re ruining the mood.”

-

“If you can’t stop crying, go away. Now. Or I’ll stab you!”

-

“Okay, see, look, I just killed the leaders, see? Just the old men. Everyone else is just locked in their rooms. Once the sect leader comes back, I’ll kill him too, and that’ll be all. Okay? Everyone else lives. I promise. Now stop crying, okay?”

-

“I don’t want to know,” Jin Guangyao said when they got back. “I don’t want to know at all.”

“Good,” Xue Yang grumbled. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Enough people heard about the reason for what you did that opinions are mixed as to whether your actions were the Chang clan’s just rewards for their former misdeeds or if they were actually wrong,” Jin Guangyao said. He looked irritated. “But you still killed high-ranking members of a sect, and you left enough alive that they’re demanding your head on a platter. You’re going to need to run away.”

Mo Xuanyu hesitantly gestured as if he wished to speak.

“Yes, you can go with him. Now that my father is dead, no one cares where you are.”

Mo Xuanyu beamed.

“You’re just going to let us go?” Xue Yang asked suspiciously. “That seems unlike you. What’s in it for you?”

“Oh, I’m not just going to let you go. I’m going to give you money, too,” Jin Guangyao said. “And all you need to do for me is one little tiny favor –”

Pity that that was when Xue Yang stopped listening, too busy staring at Mo Xuanyu’s delighted face and counting all the way he was in for it now.

-

“I’ve always wanted to take care of a baby,” Mo Xuanyu said happily.

“Good for you,” Xue Yang said darkly as he stalked through the streets.

He would rather that Jin Guangyao had needed a body buried and a death covered up or something – and judging by the baby’s perturbed expression, it probably agreed with him. Fuck, maybe Jin Guangyao had meant for them to murder the baby once they got it far enough out of the way. It was just as plausible as Mo Xuanyu's assumption that they were supposed to take care of it.

Damnit, maybe he should have been listening.

“Listen, neither of us are equipped to handle a baby. Go find a woman to help us – someone poor and helpless who doesn’t have any other choice.”

“Okay!”

-

Xue Yang shut his eyes. “What exactly,” he said slowly, “did you think I asked you to get us a woman for, exactly?”

“To…watch the baby?” Mo Xuanyu guessed. “When we’re busy or sleeping? Anyway, what’s wrong with A-Qing, anyway? She’s nice!”

“I’m not nice,” A-Qing said. The damn brat was smirking – and for once it wasn’t his damn brat, but some blind brat with a cocky expression. “I stole your wallet and you burst into tears and it was really embarrassing.”

“He does that,” Xue Yang said wearily. At least he’d noticed the theft this time – all of his lessons in ‘how not to be a sucker and get constantly taken advantage of’ were maybe having something of an impact. Maybe. “For some reason I’m apparently into it.”

He couldn’t explain it any other way.

“…loser.”

“I will stab you,” Xue Yang threatened. “I don’t care if you’re blind.”

“Won’t someone tell me why A-Qing isn’t a perfectly good babysitter?” Mo Xuanyu demanded. He was holding the baby in his arms again – the baby liked him more than it did Xue Yang, which meant that between Mo Xuanyu and the baby, the baby had better self-preservation instincts – and he was trying his best stern scowl which was of course barely more than a pout and a so-called ‘fierce’ expression that made Xue Yang want to laugh.

Not even Mo Xuanyu’s horrific make-up skills could make thatface intimidating. Or maybe it was just that the person behind the face was just so completely unthreatening that there was no help for it?

“Well? Tell me!”

Xue Yan opened his mouth, then shrugged and shut it again.

A-Qing patted Mo Xuanyu on the shoulder. “I’m too young. No milk.”

“…milk?”

“You know. The thing babies eat?”

“…milk,” Mo Xuanyu repeated, only now he looked absolutely heartbroken at having failed the mission that Xue Yang had assigned him almost entirely just to get him out of the way while Xue Yang collected some spare cash and threatened their way onto a ride out of this piece of shit town.

“It’s fine,” Xue Yang said hastily. “We’ll just get a goat or something, I don’t know.”

“Okay, I actually only came here to laugh at you,” A-Qing said. “But now I’m legitimately worried about this baby. Don’t you two know anything? How’d you even get a baby, anyway?”

-

“Stop laughing. It’s not that funny.”

-

“Seriously. Stop laughing, or I stab you.”

“Don’t worry, A-Qing,” Mo Xuanyu said. “He doesn’t mean it! Threats are just how he expresses affection!”

“It most certainly is not.”

“That is absolutely amazing,” A-Qing said, wiping her eyes. “Best thing I’ve ever heard., if by best I mean worse-but-hilarious. I mean. If that’s what he considers affection, what must his flirting be like?”

“No one is flirting with anyone!”

-

“Are you going to leave at some point?”

“Obviously not,” A-Qing said. She’d caught the same ride as them, using Xue Yang’s cash no less – Mo Xuanyu had insisted that it was the least they could do after the whole milk misunderstanding, which was stupid, she ought to be paying them for wasting their time. Xue Yang couldn’t wait to get rid of her, although he had to admit that she’d been pretty useful in terms of putting on the ‘poor sad blind girl and her two brothers all alone in the world’ act to get them a room at the inn at prices even Xue Yang felt comfortable paying. “Are you joking? This is so much funnier than walking by myself. Anyway, I enjoy watching people crash and burn.”

“Aren’t you too young to be such a bitch?” Xue Yang hissed. “And, I don’t know, blind?”

“You know what I mean.”

“I don’t care what you –”

The sound of crying came from the other room.

It was quickly followed by a second set of crying.

Xue Yang felt the onset of a headache.

“…truce?” A-Qing suggested sweetly, as if she knew exactly how much it pissed him off and thought it was the funniest thing ever, which was…probably accurate, actually. “I’ll get the baby to stop crying if you do the same with Mo Xuanyu.”

Yeah, that was definitely a headache. The sort of headache called why do I like that brat.

Mo Xuanyu owed him so much candy for putting up with this shit.

“Fine,” Xue Yang said begrudgingly. “Truce. Temporarily. And then you leave!”

-

“So we live here now, huh?” A-Qing said, looking around the house they’d claimed. “That’s neat.”

“Why do you live with us again?” Xue Yang asked her, though by now he barely even meant it. A-Qing was clearly another one in the same mold as Mo Xuanyu: you just couldn’t say no to her…or, rather, you could, at length and top volume and with threats, only it just didn’t stick. “I definitely did not recall asking you to stay.”

Though it was nice to have someone else around that wasn’t going to get immediately ripped off by literally anyone who came their way. Mo Xuanyu’d started getting conned by the literal infant that they were taking care of – he was completely hopeless.

Also, questionably blind or not, at least A-Qing had no hesitation about beating people with her stick if they struck her the wrong way, which was a life approach Xue Yang agreed with wholeheartedly.

“She’s going to learn to cultivate!” Mo Xuanyu chirped from where he was applying his make-up. “Demonic cultivation, too! We had a whole discussion about it while you were out getting groceries!”

That made a certain amount of sense, Xue Yang supposed. You didn’t need talent to be a demonic cultivator – technically speaking, given his bloodline, Mo Xuanyu was more naturally gifted in cultivation than Xue Yang, which was just wrong on all sorts of levels – and it was certainly more effective a defense mechanism than A-Qing’s stick. If there were two of them, they could protect Mo Xuanyu and the baby more effectively, taking shifts when needed, and Mo Xuanyu, who was also going to learn demonic cultivation no matter how many times Xue Yang had to hammer it into his head, could be the last line of defense, largely since no one would ever expect him to be able to do…anything…and they’d be right, too.

So it wasn’t the craziest idea in the world, only…

“…who is she going to be learning from, exactly!?”

-

“Have you ever considered charging for your skill in teaching cultivation lessons instead of your skill in stabbing people?” A-Qing asked one day. They were lying on the ground and having the corpses they’d raised fan them to try to reduce the temperature – it was that sort of day. Also, Mo Xuanyu, who might’ve objected, wasn’t around. “You’re not actually that bad at this. Might be more profitable, and less work. Just a thought.”

“Shut up. I’m great at stabbing people.”

“Yeah, but then after a while we have to move because people get annoyed at that, and it’s getting a little annoying to have to pack up all the time.”

“We’d have to move anyway. We’re wanted criminals, remember?”

“We could be wanted criminals with a house. Besides, wouldn’t you like to be called Teacher Xue?”

“What? No. Gross.”

-

“So you see, it turns out that they were teaching demonic cultivation in a safe and organized fashion,” Xiao Xingchen explained enthusiastically. “They’d even gathered up their own little sect! And of course everyone heard what the Chang clan did, so there’s no need to worry about them going around and murdering people at random – it was a targeted revenge scheme.”

“We’re working on teaching them regular cultivation,” Song Lan agreed, nodding. “To help mitigate the negative effects of demonic cultivation…well, we started out by just teaching them.”

“It turned out that they’d been secretly teaching all of the local delinquents, too, or at least Mo-gongzi had been teaching a few and Mistress Qing was teaching a few others, and even Sect Leader Xue had a few disciples,” Xiao Xingchen said, politely omitting or possibly having not noticed the fact that Mo Xuanyu had been teaching his ‘friends’ (read: scammers trying to take advantage of him), while A-Qing and Xue Yang had each been trying to form competing gangs and/or obtain lackeys. Xue Yang didn’t mind the oversight, largely on account of the fact that A-Qing had been winning, damn her – he’d kept getting distracted by inventing new things. “And a few of them had real talent – and you know that Zichen and I have always wanted to start a sect of our own, with no bloodline ties –”

“We’re joining their sect,” Song Lan said. “We’ll be leading the orthodox side, while they lead the demonic cultivation aspect – safely, of course.”

“I guess it’s better than them being crazy,” Jiang Cheng said. He sounded dubious. “I don’t like it, but at least all the demonic cultivators can be in one spot, you know?”

He made it sound like they’d be dropping off new ones there in the future.

Like they’d opened up some sort of pet rescue and were taking in unwanted puppies or something.

“Agreed,” Nie Mingjue said. “To the extent that they aren’t causing active harm, containment seems an appropriate remedy here. Who seconds the motion?”

“I do,” Lan Xichen said, and smiled at the newly agreed-upon sect. “Welcome back to the cultivation world, Sect Leader Xue.”

-

“I don’t want to know,” Jin Guangyao said, glaring.

“Don’t worry,” Xue Yang told him. “This comes as much of a shock to me as to you.”

The glare intensified, but that was fine. Jin Guangyao’s facial expressions, however minor and generally overlooked, had been the only thing getting him through that awful, awful meeting just now where people kept trying to salute him and make him salute back and if he didn’t then he was letting down Mo Xuanyu (who would send him a sad look) and A-Qing (who would hear about it from Mo Xuanyu later and then find a way to step on his foot right when he was concentrating on something).

Not to mention their two new resident lovebirds, who looked so righteous and proper from the outside but who also may or may not have accidentally full-on actually resurrected some dead asshole cultivator more or less the first time they’d joined Xue Yang in his demonic cultivation laboratory – which would have been fine, you know, that happened in demonic cultivation though not normally to quite such a wow-is-he-actually-alive extent, except that the guy’s intermittent moments of clarity suggested that his two new sect members might have just brought back the Yiling Patriarch himself, which was going to make all of them wanted criminal again the second anyone found out about it.

Ugh.

Being called sect leader was completely not worth this shit.

Xue Yang comforted himself with the reminder that later today he was planning on publicly introducing Jin Guangyao to the Xue sect’s head junior disciple “Xue Song” and announcing loudly that the brat needed some lessons in manners, that he’d heard that that was Lianfeng-zun’s specialty, and nominating him to take care of the kid while they were visiting.

See how the fucker liked that.

“I always knew Xue-gege could do great things!” Mo Xuanyu said, clapping his hands as A-Qing rolled her (by now, Xue Yang was almost definitely sure not actually blind) eyes behind his back. “As long as I went with him!”

[prettyboyhub]

haikyuu boys as insecurities they find attractive/ they’d help you with

[osamu, suna, tendou, kuroo, iwaizumi, mattsun, nishinoya]

a/n: these are all based on insecurities of mine LMAO and they turned out to be mini drabbles, but if you’d like to see any more characters OR insecurities you’re more than welcome to ask <3

OSAMU loves food. sometimes you think he loves food more than he loves you. he has yet to deny that, but one thing stands true: he’s happiest after seeing you enjoy a good meal. however, as soon as he hears you complain about how much you ate, he lets out a big scoff and glares at you. you’d say something like, “ugh, samu, i’m so BLOATED, i look fat. :(“ (queue the rude scoff-glare combo.) he’d soften his gaze and come closer to you, place his hand on your belly, and kiss you on the cheek. “ya look gorgeous, angel. ’m so happy ya ate dinner with me.”

SUNA is low energy by nature, so it only seems fitting that his s/o is too. if you come to school looking TIRED, it would make his heart swoon. of course he’d tease you (“did you do something new to your hair? go girl, give us ratsnest <3”) but there’s something about your eye bags and messy hair that makes him so soft. and if you rest your head on his shoulder???? he’s yours forever

TENDOU has been bullied his whole life, so he knows what it feels like to be insecure :(. that means, as your s/o, his only mission is to hype you up until you feel like you’re the greatest thing in existence (cuz you are to him!) but if you’re ever insecure about your ADHD, whether you can’t focus in school, or you just can’t seem to slow down, he drops everything to help you. “what do you need, love? i have a fidget cube, a coloring book, or you can play with my hands. pick your poison.” he’s very empathetic and observant of your adhd, and he always knows how to help (since he struggles with it himself and he never had anyone to help him :|) pls cherish him forever

KUROO labels himself the “funny guy” of the team. most people roll their eyes at his dad-like humor, but you think its the funniest thing ever. you can’t help but LAUGH, and i mean really laugh. snorting, tears rolling down your cheeks, slapping your knees, the whole bit. it’s an ego boost to see you laugh like that, but his heart drops a little when you cover your mouth to try and stifle your reaction. “baby, don’t hide yourself from the world.” he says gently as he takes your hand from your face. “every part if you is beautiful and unique, and i want to hear you laugh at my super hilarious jokes, okay?” you roll your eyes at his obnoxious self-confidence. “okay, tetsu.”

IWAIZUMI may be rough around the edges, but there’s no denying that he takes care of his loved ones. when you go to the gym with him and get discouraged by failure, he’s always there to lend a hand. “‘zumi, i can’t do this. i’ve been eating constantly and cutting cardio like you told me too, but i’m still WEAK. i can’t gain muscle even though i’m trying so hard :(“ he’d be a little hurt at the way you talk about yourself, but he won’t show it. “y/n, you aren’t weak. not even close. the fact that you’re even attempting to set goals for yourself and stay consistent means you’re on the right track. the results won’t be instant and i know that frustrates you, but i’m so proud of you. now finish this set, and we’ll figure out a new workout regimen for you tonight.” he doesn’t necessarily like seeing you so frustrated, but he feels honored that you trust him to help you.

MATTSUN undoubtedly is not the most punctual or organized guy around. he’s not really insecure about it, but he knows that you are. you’ve been called MESSY by your close friends and family, but he doesn’t mind that you leave a small trail everywhere you go. whether it be a kitchen cabinet open, empty containers in your room, or knickknacks you set down and forget about. in all honesty, he finds it endearing that everywhere he looks there’s a reminder of you.

NISHINOYA is our short king. he’s confident in himself, and dear god he loves you so much. good luck trying to explain to him why you’d even think you’re TOO TALL. he’ll go rabid. feral, even. perhaps he’d bark. there is no excuse for anyone thinking that you’re not the most gorgeous thing on this planet. in a rage, he’d start listing off every reason to love being tall. “you can reach so many things! you would be great at volleyball! your legs are so long! your hoodies give me sweater paws! your stride is twice mine, it’s so awesome! did i say your legs are long?! you can jump so high without even trying! you’re the perfect hugging height!” he’s so excited to love you that it doesn’t make sense to him why you don’t love every part of yourself???

[princess-of-inarizaki]

Haikyuu manager headcanons!!

Okay so these adorable teams all have the softest spot for their tiny little manager-chan, and here's how they all treat her.

[Ari's note: okay manager fics and headcanons are my absolute favourite and I love writing them]

*.` | Karasuno

They are extremely laid back with you, compared to some of the other teams. They give you your space, at the same time listen to you when you have something to say.

Respectful simps. Similar to how they act with Kiyoko (ugh yes queen-chan) they're in tears whenever you do things to motivate them, like cheer at their practice matches or give them good luck charms.

They still have the good luck charms you fastened on their bag before one of the matches.

Tanaka and Noya would literally worship the ground which you walked on. Like wow how did they get so lucky as to have three?? Cute managers?? On their team??

Yachi and you would probably subtly simp over Kiyoko with them too ngl.

Hinata and Kags would probably see you as an older sister, eventho you're their age because you're so caring and responsible.

Suga is literally your mom and Daichi is your dad. They make sure you're all healthy and you're doing well in school.

Asahi gives you hugs whenever you're sad or upset! Fite me but I think this gentle baby gives the best hugs ever >:( he's like your comfort senpai and you'd do the same for him, especially when he's feeling insecure or down.

Yams would probably be very shy around you, but he'll warm up in time.

Ahhh the best part. Tsukki! He'd find you annoying and simply not get why you're so Mcfreaking happy at first (shut up u salty beanpole, manager-chan is just a ray of sunshine, okay?) But he soon finds it endearing and slowly gets closer to you.

You walk home with Yams and Tsukki every day since your houses are close, and Tsukki walks you to your door to make sure you're safe!

Ennoshita, Kinoshita and Narita all see you as a little sister and often help you with your managerial duties.

The team cares and respects you so much, and are so thankful you've joined them!!

Meat buns at Ukai's are your hangout spot, and everytime you see them chilling you're so thankful to have such great friends.

*.` | Aoba Johsai

Aaah we're at the team of one of my favourite characters!! I'll start with Oikawa (can't you tell I'm so biased omg)

Oikawa absolutely adores manager-chan because although she's tiny, she's very strict, and doesn't let his fangirls near the gym when he's practicing, which he appreciates.

"yn-chan, you're so good to me, can I take you out as a thank-you?" Cue Iwa-chan's ball which comes flying at Oikawa's head. "Stop flirting with the manager, shitty-kawa"

Iwa's very fond of you too, but he doesn't let it show too often. Sometimes he picks up your favourite coffee from the vending machine and claims that he bought it by "accident". (How believable<3)

Kunimi probably sends you weird tiktok videos and tags you in funny memes. Very wholesome 10/10.

Kyotani just?? Doesn't understand you?? Like wow, she's small but the team listens to her?? Why?? He later finds out you're the manager. Mad dork here didn't know you were managing the team for the past month, and thought you just came to the gym to watch them practice. Smh.

Matsukawa and Hanamaki give you headpats and like taking selfies with you, much to Oikawa's dismay. He wants to be the only one taking pictures with you.

Like no manager-chan. Stop. Get away from them. My phone's right here I wanna take selfies with you :(

Kindaichi is cool with you. Y'all are bros and you game together sometimes.

Watari and Yahaba join too, and they're surprised to know that you're so aggressive when you game.

Cue a jealous Oikawa who struggles learning how to game just so he's invited to play with you. Simp smh.

They're all very gentle with you, and since you're their first female manager, they make sure to never make you feel uncomfortable.

You guys like grabbing ramen together and having eating contests. They really bring out your aggressive side but you love them for it.

*.` | Shiratorizawa

Can I just say Semi bsf material? Yes? Yes. Semi Eita is best friend material.

Makes you cute little Spotify playlists and you help him write lyrics to songs occasionally. You play an instrument too and you guys can just jam out for hours on end together.

You get the idea of applying to be the manager because of him, and it all took off from there.

Goshiki loves you. You're fond of your kohāi, and you genuinely just give this touch-starved future ace a lot of hugs and cuddles, which he's SO grateful for.

Like wow, y/n-chan isn't just pretty?? She's also so sweet? And smart? And capable? Semi why have you been hiding her for so long??¿ >:(

Goshiki is just so protective of you, he'd commit murder if he had to.

You have to earn Ushiwaka's respect, yk? And slowly but surely he comes to realise how dependable and responsible you are, and treats you like an indispensable member of the team.

He's got your back. And if he ever senses you're upset, he's trying to cheer you up as best as he can.

"do not feel upset, those grades will mean nothing to you in the future. I doubt you will be able to remember what you got in your second year, third monthly test." You think he's being sweet, and yes he is (in a way), but he's also trying to be reasonable and logical.

Tendo loosens you up and you tend to play pranks on the others with him.

The funniest was when you tried to prank Ushijima by adding wasabi to his onigiri and he?? Didn't get it??

Like "y/n-chan, Tendo, why did you add wasabi to this onigiri? It would've been so much better with tuna mayo??" And he has no reaction whatsoever?¿?

Cue Goshiki who tries the onigiri because he wants to prove he has spice tolerance like Ushijima, eventhough you can low-key see him tearing up.

Shirabu is your voice of reason and you and him often study together. You also have deep and philosophical conversations at 12 a.m. over text, and it is just so wholesome.

He respects you so much, not just because you care for him, but because he finds your brain so fricking smexy.

These eagle babies bring out the best in you and you're always eager to push them forward and bring out the best in them.

*.` | Fukurodani

First thing's first, besides Akaashi, you are the only other person who can cheer up an emo-mood Bokuto.

Just say "Hey Bo, you're gonna look so much cooler when you spike the ball like the true ace that you are" and his hair's all perking up and his eyes are shining.

Akaashi thinks you are an angel sent from heaven.

You're very soft on your baby owls, and they genuinely just love getting positive affirmations from you.

Akaashi always blushes when you compliment him on his sets. And you can hear him murmur genuine words of gratitude.

The other members do too. They're glad because sometimes people focus on Bo too much and forget to give them recognition, yk? It's easy to get overlooked :(

But thanks to manager-chan who's so attentive with all of them, and who's aware of all their quirks and moods, they're all so touched and so so happy.

You have a habit of getting cold pretty often, especially since practice finishes late and it's pretty chilly by then.

Konoha always lends you his jacket and walks you home, since your home's are the closest. There's just something about you that makes you soft.

You get along really well with Kaori and Yukie, and you'd definitely consider them your best friends, considering y'all are in this thang togetherrrr!!

The Fukurodani team are just all a bunch of crackheads, but they're your crackheads and you wouldn't trade them for the world.

You're a very tight-knit family, (like ugh I just get lots of comfortable, safe vibes from Fukurodani :(( <3)

You guys hang out at the store near your school pretty often to recharge after grueling days of practice together.

*.` | Nekoma

My second favourite team, Nekoma!! They are precious, gentle, soft babies and I love them to bits and pieces >:(

I'll start with Kuroo. You've always had a tiny soft spot for Kuroo ever since you've become his lab partner in chemistry class.

His notes are immaculate. I mean, cmon we're all hoes for pretty notes

You think he's so incredibly smart and talented, so when he suggests you become the Nekoma manager, you just agree right away.

You guys grow closer since you've started spending more time with him, and you banter around more often than not with chemistry pickup lines.

"hey kitten, let's form a covalent bond"

He's so whipped after you retort back. Like wow she called me sodium fine and said I'm like an exothermic reaction? Permission to simp??

(Ari stfu this isn't a Kuroo fanfic)

Kenma and you definitely play animal crossing together, and he even lets you try his switch, after you guys grow closer.

Kuroo is so insulted, he's never even touched Kenma's switch before >:(

You also push Kenma to do better during practice and he starts to care more about volleyball, since you seem so enthusiastic about it.

Yamamoto isn't even subtle about his simping smh T-T unlike Kuroo, he shamelessly flirts with you, and can't wait to show you off to Tanaka and Noya at the next camp.

"we have such a gorgeous manager now, Nekoma is ThRiViNg" he says in his head with this ridiculous dopey ass smile on his face +_+

Since deep down inside, you're a huge baby, you, Lev, Shibayama, and Inuoka get along so well. They're just happy energetic kittens, and they make you feel so happy.

y'alls energy just match, yk?

Although Fukunaga is shy to tell jokes, he tells them to you, because he knows you'd never judge him, and you actually kinda enjoy laughing along :) he's so touched.

Momma Yaku!! Yaku always lends you his jacket and makes sure to carry snacks for you in his bag. He knows you care so much about the team that you often neglect your own health, which is why he's always there to make you're feeling healthy and good.

Kai and Teshiro help you with your homework and like talking about their favourite singers with you.

They're all just such amazing human beings who treat you so well, and you feel so blessed to be a part of their team. You adore them so much, and they adore you back tenfold.

*.` | Inarizaki

[Ari's note: Ello there luvs, you've made it to the bottom of this sweet hc post and just get ready for Inarizaki :( they're my favourite team of all time, and I'm just so biased, I'm sorry ;-;]

Inarizaki's entire team just adores you so much, they think you're the light of their lives.

They're all super touch starved babies, and once you realized that, you've made sure to ensure they never feel that way.

Aran is kinda like your protective senpai, and his heart flutters ever so slightly when you call him that senpai kink oops and give him headpats, and he loves patting your head in return.

The twins are so incredibly soft for you.

Their fangirls are sometimes pretty mean, but one glare from the duo is enough to shut them up.

Osamu cooks bentos for you and gives you the warmest hugs when you ask for them, burying his head in the crook of your neck.

Your hand is almost always in Atsumu's because he's so slick?? Like y'all, this mf would be like "y/n-chan, my hand has been aching for a while now" and when you go to observe it, he just pulls your hand into his and pulls you to follow him.

His entire body heats up when you kiss his cheek after a particularly good game, and his brain literally goes "grrrr empty", when he's usually so sly.

The twins are your bodyguards, they follow you everywhere and protect you all the time.

Enter Suna Rintaro, your meme king. He definitely records funny moments that happen during practice and send them to you, just to make you laugh, or memes of the members.

He also definitely takes pictures of you when you aren't noticing, simply because he likes the way your hair looked, or because you looked so beautiful.

Like the twins, his eyes widen whenever you kiss his cheek or ruffle his hair, and it's literally like suna.exc has stopped functioning.

Congrats manager-chan, you broke the kid -.-

Omimi might come across as stoic and cold but he's actually a huge softie, and you often give him positive affirmations.

He's also definitely a huge lover of your hugs, and looks forward to them as motivation to play well.

He'd never tell you though, he's shy™.

My baby Kita compliments you all the fricking time.

"y/n-chan, I mean this is the most sincere way, I think this hairstyle looks stunning on you"

Or "you're so capable and you work so hard, I'm so thankful to have you by my side"

And he has the most genuine expression on his face, his eyes are so earnest and shining so bright.

And when you smile at him, he's like oh shit I made her smile, depression whom? I only know serotonin.

Ginjima is usually rash but with you, he takes his time and weighs everything he says.

He doesn't wanna accidentally hurt you and regret it since he was being careless and not thinking at all.

You calm him down when he's getting too hotheaded with gentle words and he's suddenly a blushing mess.

Unlike some of the other teams that tease you a bunch, Inarizaki treats you so gently. Their little princess, as they think of you.

So mf-ing protective, like if someone looks at you wrong, you can totally bet Atsumu's going for their ankles, sangwoo style, or Osamu is trash talking them to their knees.

Would drop anything and everything to help you if ever needed.

They think you're they're entire world because you go above and beyond for them, and they genuinely love you. Like actually LOVE you to bits and pieces.

—*.`

[Ari's note: AHHH so the manager fic is done this was literally such a joy to write!! I hope you enjoyed it

Big big hugs <3 have a beautiful day, luvs!!]