#when I started doing these no one was doing proper recaps

[jq37]

The Report Card – Fantasy High Junior Year Ep 6

Post Shrimp Jump Conspiracy Board Special

Hey y’all! Welcome back to Seacaster Manor where the shrimp party is still raging and the Bad Kids are balancing being cooler than ever with some serious sleuthing. We get a lot of new information this episode so I wanted to try out a new format for this week. I often talk in a metaphorical way about putting items up on a Conspiracy Board but I want to actually try that now that we’re a little over a quarter of the way in and have multiple overarching things happening. This is going to be a lot less linear than usual but bear with me. Gotta shake things up a little so I don’t get burnt out! There’s still fourteen more episodes to go! 

The Rat Grinders

The Bad Kids’ de facto rival party got a lot of screen time in this episode, which makes sense: Adaine declared the party their nemeses over Goldenhoard or anyone else they’ve fought, which is saying a lot. Before this point, we knew the following facts about them:

1) They got their name because the only enemies they’re recorded as killing are low level ones (including rats) that they grind in the woods behind the school, showing a willingness to follow the letter but not spirit of the rules but also an impressive amount of dedication. 

2) Their leader seems to be rogue, Kipperlily Copperkettle who is type A as hell and has a LOT of free time to kill having found the rogue professor (or at least having the rogue professor find her). She’s running for class president on a platform based around “fairness” which is a theme that’s come up more than once this season. 

3) Also on the team are emo Bard Reuben (who seems to be related to the new Artificing teacher and who shares an agent with Fig) and nonplussed Barbarian Mary Ann (who is buffing herself magically somehow).

4) Kipperlily specifically asked about where Kristen was able to create a new god. Now how, where. An odd question. 

This episode, we learned a lot more, so let's throw them on the board and make some connections!

5) The Rat Grinders have a new cleric named Buddy Dawn (something Kristen’s brother mentioned two episodes ago). He’s from Highcourt and moved with his grandparents. He’s got super Mormon+Southern “Bless Your Heart” energy and Kristen doesn’t like how familiar it feels. His vibes are clocked as well meaning but kinda judgey. 

6) Buddy Dawn was *specifically requested* by the party. Of course, requesting a cleric isn’t weird–why wouldn’t you want one? And Helioism seems a pretty common religion in the region so odds are good that if you get a cleric is would be a Helioic one. But, paired with KP’s question about Kristen, it makes you wonder if the plan is to recruit a Kristen expy and try to get lightning to strike twice.  

7) At the beer pong table, we meet the RG’s archer who is an elf named Ivy Embra. She’s got some flirty, catty energy (which we see when she interacts with Fabian and Mazey respectively).

8) We also meet the party wizard, Oisin Hakinvar, who is a Conjuration specialist with a focus in summoning. He’s a blue dragonborn which means that he has a great great great (etc) blue dragon ancestor he can ping when he needs barrels of diamonds, no problem. He has so many in fact that when Adaine lies badly that she’s also swimming in diamonds, he kindly offers to let her borrow some of his “extras”. But she turns them down, calls him great, and then panics and runs away to commiserate with Fabian who is also panicking about a flirty moment with Ivy. Oisin, for his part, seems driven to distraction and can’t make a single other shot all night. Cute! But–

9) As much as I want to wholeheartedly love Oisin (and honestly do and will until I am given direct evidence to change my mind) I have to point out that KVX, known evil bank, did change its logo from red (Goldenhoard’s color) to blue (Oisin’s Ancestor’s color) and there is a shot in the trailer of the party fighting a blue dragon. Connected? Maybe.

10) From investigating some yearbooks, the party also learns that the Rat Grinders have existed since Freshman Year but, at the time, they were called the High Five Heroes. They all look a lot more smiley and a lot less intense–Rebuen’s not even emo. It was the lineup from above, minus Buddy and plus a frost Genasi cleric named Lucy Frostblade. They learn that she supposedly died in their Sophomore year but specifically during a period near the end of the year where grades are locked and it wouldn’t affect their party comp which is…convenient. 

11) Fig tries to investigate this by disguising herself as Lucy and seeing how Ivy and Oisin react. Only Ivy sees her but she doesn’t seem shocked at all to see her allegedly dead party member She just raises an eyebrow and ditches the game to talk to her. Fig bails (and rolls only a 12 to stealth away) so we don’t get any extra info but just the fact that Ivy reacted that way is pretty juicy info as is.  

12) The other Rat Grinders don’t seem to be at the party but the members are skeptical about that. On the other hand, when Ivy leaves, it’s because Oisin pulls her aside and says, “Kipperlilly’s calling”. So it’s possible there was a Team A and a Team B for whatever the Rat Grinders were doing that night?

13) And speaking of what they're doing, we do have a theory. When Fabian checks some damage in the basement where Max and some other kids were smoking "gorgenfern" he sees that something called a cloud rider engine was smashed up pretty bad and in a suspicious way–gorgenfern doesn’t make you rowdy. Fabian checks the security tapes he obviously has and sees that some ice mephits came in and riled people up to the point of crashing into the engine. Adaine conjured some earlier in the party and as far as her arcana check can tell, they’re here, but there’s suspicion that Oisin–a conjuration wizard–could have done it. It’s certainly within his skillset. A cloud rider engine allows a vehicle to fly on clouds and it’s not clear if it was simply smashed or if something was stolen from it. 

14) Max isn’t a Rat Grinder but he did ask them all if they wanted to smoke with him and Ivy offered Fabian snuff so Riz is suspicious that the RG’s are trying to get them kicked out of school for drug use now that they have a non-Aguefort principal who presumably cares about silly rules like that at the murder school. 

That’s basically what we know about the Rat Grinders! So, to sum it up, I’d say the conspiracy board bullet points are:

Supposedly dead cleric Lucy Frostblade: What actually happened to her and why isn’t Ivy surprised to see “her”?

New cleric Buddy Dawn: Why was he specifically requested? 

The High Five Heroes: What caused them to turn into the Rat Grinders? And, as they seem like they were more gung ho their first year, why did they never pivot to fighting things other than low level monsters?

Do they actually have beef with the Bad Kids specifically or are their vibes just terrible? Were they trying to sabotage them by offering drugs? Did they break the engine on purpose and, if so, why?

Oisin: Is he chill or is he working an angle? That question technically goes to Ivy as well but I’m almost certain she’s fully working an angle, lol. I’m getting straight up Aelwyn vibes from her.

Class President: What is KP’s angle re: running for class president? This seems like something she’d want to do either way with her personality but her policy of fairness dovetails too neatly with Grix’s appearance and Cassandra’s inability to say the phrase, “It’s not fair,” last episode.

How did KP find the rogue professor and is that relevant?

And finally, why did KP want to know about where Kristen created her Freshman year god? Well, that question may be partially answered in our next section. 

God Stuff

There is a lot going on this season with celestial shenanigans between Cassandra and Galicaea and even Yes! So let’s mark out what we know.

1) Cassandra was possessed by some kind of rage entity via crystal shards that were expelled from her body. Her status is kind of up in the air right now as the party was shunted away to safety by Connor Counterspell (RIP) and all Kristen has left of Cass are some glowing, purple shards. 

2) Earlier in the fight, while lucid, Cassandra said, “I thought you were dead” about some unseen entity. Later, Kristen heard from a creepy voice that said, “She is at my side once more”. It then threatened her and slid out the rotting corpse of Yes! as a sick joke. Likely that these are the same person or at least connected. 

3) Gorgug identified that the rage stars are similar to what’s going on with Ragh’s mom, Lydia so it was put on the docket to get in touch with her about that–especially because Kalina specifically told them to track down Ragh with her last lucid words. 

4) Tracker’s Galicaea rebrand is going really well. Her social media is really popping and the endless night probably didn’t hurt. 

5) Kristen on the other hand, hasn’t been doing so hot. Due to a bunch of negligence based in lack of time management and personal uncertainty, she hasn’t been evangelizing much which means only she and Craig stand between Cass and her permanent destruction. 

6) Kristen can’t contact Cass telepathically and says she can’t use her magic which is Not Great if you're as danger prone as the Bad Kids. 

Alright, that’s all the old business so let’s move to the new business. 

7) When Kristen talked to her parents, we learned that Helio doesn’t have a chosen one since she left but we learn that it’s more serious than that. Helio also can’t choose a new chosen one. He only gets one. With Kristen gone, the whole religion is without a chosen one.

8) At a certain point, Tracker finally gets a hold of Kristen and says some harsh but true things about Kristen but, more relevant to the conspiracy board, she talks about her girlfriend Nara and Adaine, as a fellow high elf, clocks her as coming from a family of moon goddess clerics in Falinel. That raises the question: is this run of the mill teenage rebellion a la the theme song, or is she some kind of plant? We’ll hopefully get some more info from Aelwyn since Adaine texted her about it.

9) The real juicy stuff happens when we talk to Ragh’s mom. The fiend in Lydia's gem is called Bakur. Her having him in there doesn't make her rage--she's raging to keep him trapped but that's it. Her personality is the same. 

10) Bakur was a pit fiend and the right hand guy of a dead god whose name we don't know (hmm, another dead and nameless god). Bakur can't even say the god's name. It's like, weird god rules and Lydia explains in a weird vague way: gods not being able to use loopholes and saying names being powerful and rules changing for non-mortals when gods die.

11) The one very concrete info we get is that a god can only come back in a place where they were born or created. The reason Bakur’s plan failed is that he tried to bring back the nameless god in the Red Waste and not where they were created. 

12) Rana (Lydia’s party cleric) is away and Cormyr (the party sorcerer) is dead but Lydia offers to put the party in touch with Rana and Cormyr’s family because they have more stuff related to this and they were the ones who knew more about this than her. 

Following? Good. So let’s distill this down to bullets again:

Holy Helio. The corn god doesn’t have a chosen one anymore because Kristen up and left. What does that mean in a concrete sense? What can a chosen one do that a normal cleric can’t? Is Helio gonna ask Kristen to do anything this season now that we know that this is a special position that only one person can fill? Is it until she dies (or at least dies for real)? Would a fanatical Helioic person try and kill Kristen to open up that slot?

KP specifically asking WHERE Cassandra was created seems clearly tied to the info Lydia gave about only being able to resurrect a god where it was created. But what does that mean exactly? Is she trying to resurrect the same god as Bakur? Did she just assume that wherever Kristen made her god is probably where most gods are made and, thus, her best bet? What’s her angle? Is this an evil plan for just a “this will get me a good grade” plan?

Where in the world is Cassandra right now? She is MIA right now which means Kristen’s powers are too. Though I wonder if she can draw on those shards to cast spells.

We obviously can’t be sure but it seems like the voice Kristen heard and the person that Cass thought was dead is likely that unnamed god. What’s his deal? I’m sure we’ll have more info for this bullet soon. 

Is Tracker’s new girlfriend Nara, much like Ecaf, a turncoat? 

With Helio, Cass, and Galicaea all being in the mix, is there any kind of family angle being played. It doesn’t come up a ton but they are very much related. 

MISC

This is a section for a few points that don’t yet fit under the main two headings of the season but still need to go up on the board. 

Why would Aguefort program a robot that acts like Grix? Is he supposed to be like or is he hacked? If he is hacked, who would be able to do that? The new artificing teacher? The old one?

We learn that Aguefort has made a lot of contradicting proclamations and all of them are canon, so you’re able to pick and choose what you want to cite (I feel like I’m in law school again). Lots of room for loopholes which could be useful later. 

Adaine, while very drunk, had an oracle vision of Kristen at a birthday party, giving a victory speech to a bunch of teens on election night as a crescent moon hangs in the sky. The Crescent moon potentially gives them a time frame if they look into it (and it specifically being mentioned makes me think of Galicaea even though not every moon thing has to be connected to her). And we know Gorgug’s birthday is near the Frosty Folk festival so maybe that’s why the hats.

Speaking of, we know there’s a connection between Riz’s mom defending someone for money crimes re: that Festival and Gorgug’s parents hosting it so that’s something to remember. 

This isn’t something for the pin board per se but this season introduces a stress token system for downtime! I’m sure I’ll talk about it more when we use it for the first time next ep but, for now, gotta say he’s really ramping up the pressure on our kids! And, to that point, let’s do a quick check in with everyone and see what they’re up against!

Character Board

Adaine

-Adaine is still facing major money troubles. After last episode, not only is her job terminated, but she actually owes 2.5 gold for her uniform. 

-It looks like she might be developing a bit of a crush on the cute dragonborn (yay) but he’s a Rat Grinder (nooooo). I will say though, cross party romance could be a lot of fun and also my favorite NPC in this show is Aelwyn whose top 2 traits are famously Criminal and Loves Adaine so I am honestly fine with this either way lol. 

-Speaking of Aelwyn, I’ll put the sister stuff together: When Adaine calls her to ask for dirt on Nara she says, “Working, will call in five.�� And when Adaine questions the fact that it's 5am on a Saturday, Adaine just gets a winky face emoji back. Suspicious! 

Fabian

-Fabian has to juggle the new 150% course load (bard/fighter) as well as his new party house reputation.

-He has a lack of adult supervision which also means a lack of adult care and it seems to be affecting him more than he’s willing to let on. 

-But honestly his biggest obstacle is probably himself right now, lol. He made himself a new nemesis in Gertie Bladshield and I am not confident he can handle this honey trap mission with Ivy without the tables being turned on him. 

Riz

-Riz is also facing money troubles, but for him that’s kind of business as usual unfortunately.

-He has a TON of extracurriculars to keep track of but he so far seems to be handling it pretty well and is picking up some interesting allies (that double as votes for Kristen’s campaign–campaign manager is also an extracurricular he’s taken up): the aforementioned Gertie Bladeshield (Apiary Club), Sprak LeFevre (Aviation Club), and Molman Holden (Soil Club). Always good to have new allies and Aviation Club seems like it could be really useful later! I can see him making some luck checks to successfully say, “I know a guy” in a tight spot based on how many clubs he’s joined. 

-He also has the Reliable Talent ability now which means he’s incapable of rolling lower than a 21 on things he’s proficient in which includes Investigation. We’re about to be getting some INSANE lore dumps. 

Gorgug

-Gorgug has his insane 400% courseload happening and I didn’t notice this until it was pointed out to me but Zac actually leveled Gorgug DOWN in Barbarian to take an extra level of Artificer! That’s commitment. But I can’t imagine Porter, who already has a problem with him, is gonna like that. 

Fig

-Fig would hate it if I didn’t start this list by saying that she hella misses Ayda and that’s her biggest problem. 

-But she also has her album to worry about and we actually get the bombshell during a conversation with Mazey that she’s not even sure that she still wants to be a bard.

-On top of that, she’s taking Barb and Warlock classes along with the Bard classes she’s finally going to. 

-She has her gnarly Gilear curse happening that’s seemingly connected to whoever the boss who owns the pride armor is. 

-She has beef with Rebuen and is living her double life as Wanda Childa to try and learn whatever she can about him/the Rat Grinders. 

-Both she and Wanda are wanted by the Solace FBI.  

-On a positive note, she really endeared herself to Mazey by sweetly sticking up for her when Ivy was being catty. If Fig wasn’t so devoted to Ayda I could have read their interaction at the end of the ep as flirty. Regardless, nice moment and great ally. 

Kristen

-Welp, her god is, if not dead, MIA which is arguably the biggest deal of anything on any of these lists, especially since it’s tied to her magic AND her grade. 

-Next of course is the potato to her meat on her plate: her campaign. But that’s actually going really well, especially after this party. Her biggest issue is whether or not she can get Fetty Wap to homecoming and, lbr, in a pinch Fig can just disguise herself as him. When has that ever not worked?

-She also has this unnamed god (or whoever it is) taunting her and threatening her specifically which isn’t ideal. 

-But I honestly think she was more fucked up by the conversation which Tracker where her ex basically outlined everything she needs to get together in her life and then posted a pre-written pic with her new girlfriend. That’s gotta sting. 

And that’s it! I wanted to focus on the specific nuggets of info we got this episode and start to connect them with what we knew so far. Different format, I know, but I’m feeling experimental this season and I might switch it up a few more times as Junior Year goes on. I love covering Fantasy High but, like I said at the top, I have to keep it fresh so I don’t burn out. See you next time when Brennan makes the stress we’re all feeling an actual game mechanic! Fun!

[tizeline]

TSAU Season 1 Finale - Part 1

It's about damn time I go over the TSAU's version of the remaining season 1 finale, as well as episode 1 of season 2, so HERE WE ARE! I am too lazy to adapt the entire thing into a proper comic, especially considering several plot points remain rather unchanged from canon, so we're doing whatever this format is instead.

(You should read Cell Talk and Gearing Up before this if you haven't already)

But a quick recap, the Gearing Up comic ended with Draxum in the Dark Armour going up to the surface with Mikey to start with the whole conquering humanity thing. Raph and Leo have offically joined Team Good Guys and they, alongside Donnie, Splinter, April, Shelldon and Mayhem went after Draxum to stop his evil plans.

When they make surface, Draxum and Mikey have already started their rampage and are just kinda wrecking the baseball stadium. The Foot are also at the stadium, clearly still expecting The Shredder to show up or something. Team Good Guys (yes that's their name now) figure it's probably good to try to get whatever info about the Dark Armour they can so April and Mayhem teleport to where The Foot are to try to gather some intel that might help them in the fight against Draxum.

Meanwhile, the others start fighting Draxum and Mikey. Draxum is low-key kinda baffled that Raph just straight up switched teams lmao. Leo is one thing, but Raph has always been so loyal and responsible so it's real suprising that he's completely disobeying orders. None of the Draxum family members are really enthusiastic about fighting each other (except maybe Mikey he's kinda pissed at this point) but they engage in battle anyway. Donnie, Shelldon and Splinter are less hesitant about kicking Draxum's ass and don't really hold their punches lmao. Despite that they're kinda struggling considering both Drax and Mikey are so strong, but that's when April and Mayhem teleport back with that useful intel!

What April learned from her intel-gathering is that The Foot think there is some kind of flaw with the armour, like in canon, you know the deal. What differs from canon is exactly how that flaw occured. Turns out that Donnie when he was younger got a little bit carried away with giving Shelldon cool powerful weapons and Shelldon enced up accidentally shooting up the teapot to smithereens, oopsie! Donnie managed to reassembe it before Splinter saw, but with one of the pieces having gone missing he had to sacrifice his Atomic Lass figurine to plug up the final hole (he's still upset about that to this day btw). BUT POINT IS, like in canon this means that the armour has a obvious weakpoint and if they hit that it might be enough to knock Draxum out of the armour!

You know what happens next, they resume the fighting with this new strategy in mind and eventually they manage to get a lucky hit in and as predicted knocking out the Atomic Lass toy causes Draxum to get knocked out as well. Except YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS and you know it's not quite that easy. Lo and behold, the Atomic Lass figurine was the last thing keeping The Shredder from being resurrected, so now that it's gone? Yeah, the Dark Armour is finally completed, it slurps Draxum's life-force or whatever and then spits him out.

The Shredder is back.

... Except not entirely of course, like in canon he's acting like a wild animal attacking anything that moves, but regardless it's still a new threat they have to deal with. With Draxum being so hurt, Leo makes the decision to portal him back home, and to also send Mikey with him. Both because Draxum probably needs someone to look after him and also Leo doesn't really wanna deal with Mikey's attitude at the moment with everything else going on lmao.

From here on out the battle against Shredder begins. This too goes mostly the same way as in canon, Shredder kinda kicks all of their asses before suddenly teleporting away, and then that song and dance repeats a couple of times before Team Good Guys figure they need a better strategy. Splinter brings up how Big Mama would probably have a way to subdue Shredder, only problem is that it's BIG MAMA and he does NOT wanna go anywhere close to her. In canon Leo brought Splinter with him to BM anyway, but in the AU he kinda respects Splinter, or rather Lou Jitsu, too much to force him to come along. Instead Leo decides he and Raph will go to BM for help, while the others keep Shredder from completely wrecking New York.

The rest of the finale continues in Part 2!

[fanfictionismyaddiction]

WAG Bootcamp

Part 2

Word count: 767

Pairing: lando Norris x reader, but mostly just Y/n and the WAGs

Summary: Y/n, Lando Norris’ new girlfriend, attends her first F1 race and is swiftly taken under the wing of the WAGs, who teach her the unspoken rules of f1

________________________________________________________

Y/n had been to big events before. Red carpets, premieres, and fashion weeks—she could handle a camera flash like a pro. But standing at the entrance of the paddock for her first-ever Formula 1 race, wearing her McLaren pass around her neck, she felt completely out of her depth.

The world of F1 wasn’t just about fast cars; it was about politics, strategy, and—most terrifyingly—the WAGs.

Lando had kissed her goodbye at the hospitality entrance, promising to see her after FP1, and that was when she was ambushed.

“Alright, rookie,” Kika, Pierre Gasly’s girlfriend, looped an arm through hers, her honey-blonde hair bouncing as she steered Y/n toward a private table in the paddock. “Time for bootcamp.”

“Bootcamp?” Y/n repeated, feeling a bit like a deer in the headlights.

“You think you can just waltz in here and be a proper F1 girlfriend without guidance?” Lily, Alex Albon’s girlfriend, teased, sliding into a seat with a knowing smirk. “No, sweetheart, it doesn’t work like that.”

“You’re lucky,” Alex, Charles Leclerc’s girlfriend, added. “Not everyone gets the full WAG orientation on their first weekend. Usually, we just let them suffer.”

Y/n blinked. “Should I be scared?”

Rebecca, Carlos Sainz’s girlfriend, gave her an encouraging pat on the back. “Yes.”

Lesson One: Pre-Race Preparation

“You need to know how to handle Lando before a race,” Carmen, George Russell’s girlfriend, started, flipping her sunglasses onto her head. “Every driver has their own pre-race routine. If you mess it up, congratulations—you’re the reason he finishes P12.”

“Wait—what?” Y/n’s eyes widened. “That’s a lot of pressure.”

“Not really,” Kelly, Max Verstappen’s girlfriend, said with a shrug. “Just don’t be annoying. Keep the energy calm, don’t talk too much, and if he’s in the zone, let him stay there.”

Kika nodded. “Pierre needs hype. So I tell him he’s the best, kiss him, and send him off like a gladiator into battle. Meanwhile, Lily literally has to trick Alex into thinking racing is just a fun little game so he doesn’t overthink.”

Lily grinned. “I gaslight him into thinking it’s no big deal. Works like a charm.”

“Susie?” Y/n turned to Susie Wolff, the ultimate WAG and wife of Toto Wolff. If anyone knew how to manage an F1 man, it was her.

Susie sipped her espresso like a woman who had seen it all. “Toto is different. He’s not the one in the car, but believe me, he’s more dramatic than any of the drivers.” She sighed. “My advice? Just make sure Lando doesn’t forget to eat.”

“Got it. No messing with his pre-race mood, gaslight if necessary, and make sure he eats,” Y/n recapped. “I can do that.”

Lesson Two: Media Management

“Now, the media,” Alex said, leaning in. “You’re dating Lando. People will analyze everything you do. What you wear, how you look at him, whether or not you smiled when he crossed the finish line.”

“You need to learn the ‘paddock girlfriend’ face,” Kelly instructed. “Not too excited, not too miserable—just engaged enough to look like you care, but also mysterious.”

Lily demonstrated, tilting her head slightly and pressing her lips together in the perfect neutral expression.

Y/n tried to mimic her but ended up looking mildly constipated.

“We’ll work on it,” Carmen assured her.

“And social media,” Rebecca added. “Fans will stalk every post, every like. If you breathe near another driver, they’ll start a conspiracy theory that you’re cheating.”

Y/n groaned. “Oh, fantastic.”

“Just own it,” Kika advised. “If they start a rumor, make it worse. That’s what I do.”

Lesson Three: Surviving the Race

“You are now a part of the emotional rollercoaster that is watching your boyfriend risk his life at 300 km/h,” Susie said with a knowing look. “You will feel stress, anxiety, and possibly rage.”

“If someone crashes into Lando, you are obligated to hate that driver for at least two weeks,” Kelly informed her.

“And you need a coping strategy,” Rebecca added. “I stress-eat.”

“I online shop,” Alex said.

“I start manifesting,” Lily said dramatically.

“I drink,” Kika said, holding up a glass of champagne.

Y/n exhaled. “This sport is insane.”

The women all nodded in agreement.

As the session wrapped up, Y/n felt a new sense of confidence. Maybe she wasn’t fully prepared yet, but she had an elite team of WAGs ready to guide her through the chaos.

Just then, her phone buzzed. A message from Lando: How’s your first F1 day going?

She smiled, typing back: I think I just joined a secret society.

And so, the newest recruit of the WAG Bootcamp was officially initiated.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

lilia dorm uniform vignettes + book 7 parallels

I was rereading Lilia's Dorm Uniform vignettes recently and honed in on the third part, which reminded me a lot of the events of book 7. I think it's highly likely that part 3 here foreshadows book 7, similar to how Ortho's Precision Gear vignettes foreshadowed the original Ortho's passing, revealed in book 6.

***Lilia Dorm Uniform vignette(s) and Book 7 spoilers!***

Quick recap, these vignettes focus on Lilia looking after a baby bat with an injury. The third and final part involves Malleus chatting with him about the experience. Lilia describes parenting as thus: "There's never a guarantee in life that someone will be there to support you. Once you fly out into the world, there may be days when you go without a proper meal and sleep on an empty stomach. You'll experience failures and setbacks. You may have days where your heart feels like it'll shatter into a thousand pieces. As long as you're alive, there will be moments—many moments, in fact—when you must face adversity entirely on your own. A parent must ensure their child can handle such harshness while the little one is still under their protection."

Knowing what we know now... It sounds as though Lilia is reflecting back on his time traveling the world in hopes of finding a way to hatch Malleus from the egg. Firstly, Lilia (especially in the past) has expressed sentiments about being alone. He was an orphan taken in as a ward by the Draconias, yet he still never felt as though he "fit", not with the way the senate treats him like a lesser being, and not with his two best friends (Maleanor and Raverne) marrying and conceiving a child--starting a family, something Lilia feels he does not have and cannot have himself. There's never a guarantee in life that someone will be there to support you. And that's true of Malleus as well. His father is missing and presumed dead, his mother died in a battle to ensure his safety, and his grandmother is kept busy with royal duties to be there for him all the time. That's why Lilia had to step up as his father figure--because otherwise Malleus would have no guidance, just like Lilia did in his youth, which led him into becoming closed off and unwilling to learn about the world beyond Briarland. He doesn't want Malleus--or any of his "kids"--to perpetuate the hatred and distrust that claimed so many lives and left scars on the survivors.

Once you fly out into the world, there may be days when you go without a proper meal and sleep on an empty stomach. This line is reflective of the experiences Lilia had on his travels. In the beginning, it was particularly difficult due to the prevailing anti-fae sentiments among humans. Lilia was not welcome in their communities; he'd have things and nasty words thrown at him and literally be chased out of towns. True, he's also had to deal with rations and always being alert while serving as a general, but it feels particularly frustrating in this context because 1) none of his men are around to support him in these moments; he is lacking the feeling of being a part of a group, and 2) the harsh treatment is being committed by a group for which he cannot retaliate, so it forces Lilia to stand there and just take it... Both conditions which are also true of Lilia when he is able to safely bring Malleus's egg to Castle Blackscale. The senate gang up on him, isolate him, and deem him unworthy of touching the heir... and Lilia can't do anything about it. He isn't accepted at home and he isn't accepted by the world. This makes it that much more meaningful when, later on his travels, he meets an elderly couple in Harveston that welcome him into their house and home. They offer him a warm bed, food, and, more importantly, they are his company. They want to hear his stories, learn more about him and his life experiences. They’re that light at the end of his tunnel--but those things aren't promised to him, and Lilia knows he can't count on them all the time, especially as he travels to the most remote regions. And don't we all fear that dreadful realization of being out on our own with no net to catch us if we fall?

You'll experience failures and setbacks. You may have days where your heart feels like it'll shatter into a thousand pieces. As long as you're alive, there will be moments—many moments, in fact—when you must face adversity entirely on your own. Again, Lilia is also speaking about himself. He was forced to abandon his princess and flee with her child. He lost his best friends and large sections of his home country to a bloody conflict. He took the senate's verbal abuse and degradation. All of this, he faced alone--even when Baur tries to stand up for him, Lilia silences his ally because, deep in his heart, he thinks he deserves this. The wild bat incapable of love, only able to slaughter, doomed to be alone forever. It's through his forced exposure to the world that Lilia learns to open up, and it's through the connections--after enduring so many hardships, so many trials and tribulations--he makes with others that he comes to learn he is capable of love. As Silver says, this must be why the happiest moment of his father's life is the moment of Malleus hatching. A dragon's egg can only do so with the love of a parent--and Lilia has always been that for him. Diasomnia is Lilia's new family, and he's no longer alone. The problem now is that it's Malleus's turn to learn harsh life lessons, and he isn't exactly prepared for them. A parent must ensure their child can handle such harshness while the little one is still under their protection. I think this line perfectly summarizes Lilia's motivations for leaving in the fashion that he does. When Lilia attempted to depart NRC without so much as a formal farewell to Malleus and Silver, many fans were confused as to why he was acting so callous towards his children. Some theorized that Lilia was lying about losing his magic or had some other ulterior motive for lying--when, really, I think the answer is much simpler than that. Lilia wanted to leave as soon as he could, without facing his kids, because that's just in his nature. As Malleus points out in the vignettes: "Is that why you took the approach you did? [...] I suspect this bat will thrive in the wild." This entire time, Lilia hasn't been the gentlest or the most prudent with the baby bat. He fed it milk from a cup instead of a bottle (which resulted in getting the bat all wet), roughly toweled it off, allowed it to hang in a tree when it may not be ready to fly yet, brushed off the possibility of it being hurt again if it falls out, etc. On a surface-level, it looks like bad caretaking. But Malleus wonders if it's intentional. Because the bat was put through those experiences, it can take care of itself once it has parted from Lilia's care. I suspect Lilia may think the same of how he raises his own children. After all, Silver and Sebek sometimes bring up how hellish Lilia's training sessions with them were. Some of his bad childcare is due to Lilia being disorganized and just winging it in the moment, yeah (something which Malleus comments on at the end of the vignettes)--but a lot of how he raises others is also built on the idea that this should make the kids stronger and able to stand on their own.

When Lilia goes to return the baby bat to its flock, he says, "Go on, little one. You can't cling to my hand forever. Get flying." Then Malleus laughs and remarks, "Heh, it seems rather attached to you. It doesn't want to let go." Lilia continues with, "I'm shaking my arm and it's still not letting go... Goodness gracious. I didn't raise [the baby bat] to be so clingy. There comes a time in every creature's life when they have to take action. This is your time, little one. Don't miss your window." And, at last, when the bat is able to take off, Malleus realizes, "[...] I must say, it was rather harsh of you to forcibly shake off the poor fellow when it clearly liked you. Did you intentionally act detached so that it wouldn't fall too far behind the colony?"

THIS WHOLE SCENE IS AN ANALOGY TO LILIA TRYING TO LEAVE NRC WITHOUT SAYING GOODBYE TO HIS KIDS.

In this analogy, Malleus is that bat that Lilia has reared--and when it comes time for Lilia to leave, Malleus won't allow for it. Malleus is the clingy baby bat gripping onto his caretaker for dear life. I wonder if Lilia knew that his prince would have a hard time with it, so he tries to have one last happy send-off--so he can grant Malleus the happiness of being invited to something, to be included, and to provide him ample opportunities to socialize with his peers from all the dorms and make other connections so they can be there for him when Lilia is no longer able to. Then Malleus was late, and the time for Lilia to depart has already arrived. But maybe it's better this way, Lilia may have reasoned with himself. If Malleus doesn't appear, maybe he can't be hurt. If Lilia acts detached, maybe... just maybe... it will give Malleus the final shove he needs to let him go, to open up to the people who are going to be present around him, so he won't "fall too far behind the colony", like what happened with the actual baby bat he raised. This is especially suspect because Lilia makes the same plea to the first years earlier in the party by asking them to please give Sebek a lil' push if he ever needs it. "Just... If you notice [Sebek is] ever stuck at some point during your time here... I would ask that you card soldiers give him a little nudge."

THE LILIA DORM UNIFORM CARD FIRST CAME OUT ON THE JP SERVER IN FEB 2023 ALONG WITH SOME EARLY BOOK 7 UPDATES 😩 It’s such good foreshadowing for what happens much later in the same book… OTL I just hope that Malleus is able to learn the lessons Lilia wants him to. Then Malleus can finally be the baby bat that’s able to take flight on his own and join a flock without his guardian at his side forever and ever…

[hai7ani]

inspired by this tiktok

Ran gifts you a Jellycat bunny on a random Thursday, right after you reach home from class.

You're in his lap talking about your day, twirling hair around your fingers as you ponder, recap, and speak. He still sees glistening stars in your orbs despite the heavy bags under your eyes, the youth in your crooked smile while you tell him about the campus cat who'd recently gave birth to five sweet kittens 一 all in different colours.

And then he reaches beneath his bed to shove an expensive looking box into your hands. He had been waiting for the right moment to show it to you, and he finally found it.

You grow red after seeing it. Ask him why he even bought it at all because it's so expensive and it's not a necessity. At all. It's just gonna sit in your bed and attract dust and it has no proper practical use for someone your age. You're living together in a one-bedroom apartment juggling studies and gigs and a little bit of this and that while struggling with paying rent on time and a Jellycat is definitely not something that he should be spending his money on.

He gets annoyed as you go on and on about it, because this is something that he wants to do for you. He got it for you. Why are you even doubting him? Scolding him for something innocent that he poured effort into?

Though the frown on his face disappears very quickly when he sees the little red on your nose, the tears pooling in your eyes after you stop and take a deep breath.

You're trying so hard to be brave. To remain a big girl.

He knows.

Because despite this stupid toy not being a necessity in your household; despite the awful things you'd said to him and to yourself 一 and about the poor bunny stuffed with cotton that has no feelings 一 to try and make yourself believe that this is as useless as you said it was 一 it is still something that the little girl in you have always wanted.

He sees right through your front 一 right at her, small and shy, crouching in the dark, little hands holding onto the bunny that you've said mean things about just earlier 一 and he softens.

A part of childhood that you never got to have.

You couldn't deny it after all.

He knows.

"You're not worried?" Your voice is small, just like the way you're discretely pushing the bunny close to your chest, squishing its cheeks, flapping its ears, hiding a wet sniffle in between. He hums as a question, for you to continue.

"You spoil me too much. People are gonna say you're dating a spoiled brat."

He knows you're referring to the gifts he likes buying from time to time. Just last week he'd gifted you a pair of earrings way out of your budgets and you'd given him the same reaction then.

Angry and confused.

You're not used to being pampered. Being treated so gently.

And it is true 一 Ran spoils you way too much to be seen as normal, or 'appropriate', traditionally. Been this way since you've started dating. He likes pampering you in his own ways, though you've still yet to grow used to it and you're not sure why. Perhaps it's the guilt for spending money on yourself, or because you're used to not being important at all.

He combs fingers through your hair.

"It's alright." A kiss to the side of your head. Ran has always been open with affection.

"Who the hell cares?" A hand is pressed against your back, pushing you closer to himself.

Into his heart.

"If I don't spoil you, who will?"

[satorrruuu]

WAIT I’M REMEMBERING THE FIC I FORGOT TO WRITE DOWN

“I could give you a baby.”

━━ decide which jjk character it is in the poll at the end? <3

So, you’ve been in what you hoped to be your final relationship for a while now. You’re in your late 20s or early 30s at this point, and it’s always been your dream to have kids. One or two, you’re not super picky, but you really want to have that - a loving partner raising a couple of kids together in a lovely house.

Everyone knows this about you: It’s been your dream since high school to have a baby. And it’s not like you were super traditional. It’s just smarter and safer to have a kid when you have the proper funds and support, maybe even taking a few years off work. So, you’ve been saving and planning your life around making that happen.

Your current partner, whom you’ve been with for YEARS, knows this. He’s an all-around nice guy who gets along with your parents and friends, and seemed happy to be in that future-father role. Sometimes he was a bit dismissive when you would ask occasionally what opinions he had on how to make a nursery, what sort of parenting style they should use, etc. He would say, ‘He didn’t really have an opinion’ and ‘now wasn’t the right time to start executing’ and ‘he wanted to get another work promotion and vacation before doing all that’.

Surprise, surprise, the dude was happy that you were treating him like your Provider Baby Daddy before he was one, and since you were so on top of creating plans and driven to make something of your own, he was ready to just coast through life on your hard work. — Maybe that was a mean take on it, but you really were frustrated! He told you, to your face, that he had hoped you’d change your mind about wanting to be a mom. He felt comfortable with you, and because this was the only setback, he wasn’t willing to end the relationship over differing opinions.

So you broke up with him—thank god it was before you both bought that house you were looking at together—and now you’re back to square one.

This is basically all you’ve been telling your friend since you sat down at your monthly coffee meet-up.

It’s all so ridiculous! He wasted your time! This is the window you’ve been planning for, where you were financially ready to have a baby. Even though you still wish to have that extra savings cushion, a partner could give you that if anything were to go wrong or if you’d just like to take more leave from work.

Your body is healthy, and you’ve been researching and preparing to be in your best shape and diet for so long to make it easier to have a smooth and relaxing pregnancy.

God, it was all coming apart. Now you are worrying about your age. You weren’t at the limit by any means, but the longer you wait, the more at risk you are for complications in your life and body. And your parents are getting older, and you really, really wanted them to have a chance to play with their grandchild before their bodies started slowing down.

And fuck, it’s not like it’ll be easy to find the perfect match to commit to spending the rest of your life with - or even just dealing with, if you ended up separating.

But maybe you didn’t have to stress about all this stuff. Because your dear friend had been listening wordlessly through your entire rant, and when you finally went silent, he says to you, dead serious,

“I could give you a baby.”

Poll’s duration will be long because I really want you to think about it lmao. I’m kidding, I’m just busy finishing up a project on my main, I just had to get this idea down before I forgot again. I think I’d write a little teaser recapping all this information first, but I don’t imagine the fic will be super long—it’s a quick-read mini-series at most. There will be baby-making, of course. Love you, thank you for helping me!💕 + Those pretty dividers were made by @/saradika-graphics !

[mattsobvimyfav]

roommates (matthew sturniolo)

pt 11-

TRIGGER- smut

a/n - this one is LONG

The next morning, I was dead to the world. After staying up late with Matt, Chris, and Nick, I couldn’t bring myself out of bed for their game. When Nick shaked me awake asking if I was coming, I mumbled something about being exhausted and pulled the blanket over my head.

“Fine bitch,” he said, shutting the door.

I slept until the afternoon, waking only when I heard the sound of keys jingling and the door opening. Matt and Chris were back from their game, voices low as they recapped the highlights.

I yawned, stretching as I rolled out of bed. Matt looked up from the couch, his damp hair still sticking to his forehead.

“You sleep all day?” he asked, a smirk tugging at his lips.

“Pretty much,” I said, grabbing a bottle of water from the mini-fridge.

He stood up, grabbing his keys off his desk. “Come for a ride with me before the party tonight?”

I blinked, caught off guard. Matt never asked me to do anything with him, let alone spend time one-on-one. “Yeah sure”

“Good. Let’s go,” he said, heading for the door without waiting for a proper response.

The car ride was quiet but not awkward. Matt played some music, the bass thumping lightly as the wind rushed through the cracked windows. I couldn’t help but wonder why he’d invited me along. He’d been spending a lot more time with me lately, and I wasn’t sure what to make of it.

After about ten minutes, he turned onto a narrow street and pulled up in front of a small, run-down house.

“What are we doing here?” I asked, glancing around.

“Business,” he said vaguely, turning the car off.

Before I could ask for details, the front door swung open, and a girl came bounding out. She was tall and lean, dressed in nothing but tiny shorts and a lace bra, her blonde hair cascading down her back. Her face lit up when she saw Matt, but the second her eyes landed on me, her smile twisted into a scowl.

“Who’s this?” she asked, glaring at me as she leaned against Matt’s window.

“No one,” Matt said flatly, reaching into his hoodie pocket and pulling out a small plastic bag.

My eyebrows shot up, and I crossed my arms, leaning back in my seat. The girl was clearly trying to get his attention, twirling her hair and giggling as she handed him some cash, but Matt was all business. He took the money, handed over the bag, and didn’t say a word as she leaned further into his window, practically shoving her chest in his face.

“You should come inside for a bit,” she purred, running her fingers along the edge of the car door.

“Can’t,” Matt said curtly, starting the engine.

Her eyes flicked back to me, narrowing. “Right. You’re busy with… this.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but Matt didn’t give me the chance. He pulled away from the curb without so much as a goodbye, leaving her standing in the street.

The car was silent for a moment before I finally spoke. “So, that’s your ‘business’?”

“Don’t start,” he muttered, his knuckles tightening on the steering wheel.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Good,” he said, glancing at me briefly before turning his focus back on the road.

When we got back to campus, I still wasn’t sure what to make of the whole thing. Matt didn’t bother explaining, and I didn’t push. He parked the car, and we walked back to the dorms in silence.

Whatever that was, it was just another layer to the enigma that was Matt.

After getting back to the dorms, I started getting ready for the party. I wasn’t about to half-ass it tonight. The energy between me, Matt, and Chris had been different lately, and if I was going to keep their attention—especially Matt’s—I wanted to look good.

I rummaged through my closet and finally settled on a sheer red tank top with a black bralette underneath, paired with a leather mini skirt and my favorite black leather boots. The outfit hugged my curves perfectly, and when I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t help but smirk. I put on minimal makeup and curled my hair into loose waves.

As I finished up, I heard the door swing open and the loud chatter of Nick, Chris, and Matt filtering into the dorm. Nick, always the most extra of the group, immediately gasped as he saw me.

“Damn, girl,” he said, leaning on the doorframe with a grin. “You’re getting fucked tonight.”

I laughed, adjusting my skirt. “You think?”

“Oh, for sure. Hell, I’m even thinking about it,” Nick replied. “Come on, we need to take pictures before we head out.”

I rolled my eyes, finally turning to where Chris and Matt were lounging, both freshly showered and dressed. Chris had his usual easygoing smirk, but Matt gave me a once-over, his expression unreadable as his eyes lingered on my outfit.

“You good?” I asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah,” he said shortly, looking away as Nick grabbed his phone.

“Stand up bitch, I want to leave soon” Nick commanded, waving us into position.

Nick started with group shots. Chris slung an arm around my shoulders, grinning like an idiot, while Matt stood on my other side, his left hand snaked around my lower back and waist.

After a few shots of all three of us, Nick directed Chris and me to take some photos together. Chris was all about the camera, pulling me into playful poses that had me laughing and trying not to trip over myself.

“Now you and Matt,” Nick said, motioning for Chris to step aside.

I glanced at Matt, who sighed but stepped closer anyway. Unlike Chris, Matt wasn’t as playful. He just stood there, his expression a little softer than usual.

“Come on, Matt, loosen up!” Nick teased.

Matt rolled his eyes but managed a small smirk, pulling me into his side by my waist.

“This ok?” he leaned over and whispered in my ear.

I simply nodded, too caught off guard and flustered to form a response. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to make my heart race.

After that, Nick insisted on taking solo shots of me. He hyped me up the whole time, positioning me in different angles and making me laugh.

“Yes bitch! You’re serving cunt,” he said, snapping away.

“Yeah, yeah,” I said, but I couldn’t help smiling.

By the time Nick was satisfied, we were all laughing and ready to head out. The photos turned out sexy as fuck and I was satisifed as we headed for the door. Tonight was going to be interesting—I could feel it.

The party had already started and the music was loud enough to feel in my chest. It was in a house a little further off campus, so Matt had offered to be the designated driver, leaving Chris, Nick, and me free to let loose.

As soon as we got inside, Chris handed me a shot, and Nick grabbed one for himself.

“Shot for shot?” Nick challenged, raising an eyebrow.

“Bet,” I said with a grin, clinking my glass against theirs before tossing it back.

It didn’t take long for the drinks to kick in. The three of us were a mess of laughter and downing shots until the burn barely registered anymore. Chris eventually found himself a seat on the couch next to Matt, who was content to just sit back and smoke, watching the chaos unfold.

Nick, on the other hand, dragged me to the middle of the living room, where the makeshift dance floor was packed with people.

“Dance bitch,” he said sarcastically, spinning me around.

I laughed, swaying my hips to the beat as Nick danced around me, hyping me up like only he could. We were surrounded by other college students, but it felt like I was in my own world.

From the corner of my eye, I could see Matt and Chris watching us. Chris was grinning, clearly amused, but Matt just sat there as he passed the joint between his fingers.

And then it happened.

I was mid-spin when I felt someone shove me from behind, hard enough to make me stumble.

“What the fuck?” I turned, only to come face-to-face with a girl I hadn’t seen in years, or so I thought.

It took a second for it to click, but when it did, my stomach dropped. It was her. The girl from earlier, the one Matt had sold to. Only now, I realized why she looked so familiar—she’d gone to my high school.

“You really think you can just waltz in and take Matt from me?” she snapped, her voice loud enough to draw attention. “I’ve been after him for over a year, and now you think you’re something special?”

I blinked, stunned for a moment before finding my voice. “Take him from you? I don’t even—what are you talking about?”

“Don’t play dumb,” she sneered, stepping closer. “I saw the way he looks at you. You’re pathetic.”

I wasn’t about to back down, especially not to her. “And you’re embarrassing yourself,” I shot back. “Maybe focus less on Matt and more on getting a personality.”

I felt the rage bubbling up before I could stop it. The second she walked off, I yelled after her, “You’re just mad because he doesn’t want you, you desperate whore!”

The music wasn’t loud enough to cover my outburst, and people started turning their heads. My voice carried through the room, venom dripping from every word.

Suddenly, Matt was there. I didn’t even see him get up from the couch, but he was standing right in front of me, his hand gripping my shoulder firmly, his other hand quickly covering my mouth.

“Shut up,” he muttered lowly, leaning down until our faces were inches apart.

His hand on my face didn’t hurt—it wasn’t rough—but it was enough to catch me off guard and silence me. His fingers lightly brushed my cheek, and his intense eyes locked onto mine.

“Don’t do this,” he said quietly, his voice low and steady. “I’ll handle it. Stay out of it.”

For some reason, the way he looked at me—calm but dominant, with that rough edge only Matt had—did something to me. My anger melted away, replaced with a heat I wasn’t ready to admit to.

Matt straightened, his hand dropping from my face as he turned around, his whole demeanor shifting. His jaw was tight, and his light eyes zeroed in on the girl, who was still throwing daggers at me with her glare.

“Listen,” Matt started, his voice sharp, loud, and cutting. “I’m not anyone’s property. Not yours, not hers, not anybody’s. So why don’t you fuck off before I make you leave?”

Her mouth opened to argue, but Matt didn’t give her the chance.

“And another thing—Y/N is my roommate. She’s off-limits to all you psychos. So leave her the fuck alone. Got it?”

The room was dead silent, tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. His jaw still tight, and shot one last glare at the girl before heading back toward the couch.

I stood there, stunned, my heart racing from the spectacle he’d just caused. My mind was spinning,

The party was buzzing again, but I couldn’t focus on anything except Matt’s outburst earlier. The way he’d shut that girl down, stood up for me, and then made it clear to everyone that I wasn’t to be messed with—it had my head spinning. And if I was honest, it wasn’t just my head.

After grabbing another drink, I found myself wandering back to the couch where Matt and Chris were sitting. Chris had some girl perched on his lap, laughing at whatever stupid joke he’d just told. Matt, on the other hand, was leaning back, his usual brooding self, passing the blunt lazily between his fingers as if the whole scene earlier hadn’t even happened.

I didn’t say anything as I walked over. I just plopped myself down on Matt’s lap, settling in like I belonged there.

His body stiffened for a second. “What are you doing?”

I shrugged, leaning back slightly into his chest. “Sitting.”

“You’ve got your own seat,” he muttered, taking another hit from the blunt, the smoke curling around his lips.

I smirked, reaching up and plucking it from his fingers before he could pass it to Chris. “This one’s better.”

Matt exhaled sharply, a mix of annoyance and amusement flickering across his face. “You’re drunk.”

“Not as drunk as you think,” I said, taking a drag and handing it back to him.

Chris glanced over, the girl still giggling in his lap, and raised an eyebrow. “The fuck? Y/N and Matt playing nice for once?”

“Shut up, Chris,” Matt said flatly, taking the blunt from my hand and pulling another slow hit.

I smiled, settling more comfortably against him. Matt didn’t push me off or tell me to move, and his hand eventually rested on my thigh, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Chris chuckled, shaking his head. “Whatever, kid. Just don’t kill each other before the end of the night.”

I leaned my head back slightly, turning to look up at Matt. “You’re not mad at me, are you?”

His eyes flicked down to mine, the corner of his mouth twitching. “Should I be?”

I held his gaze, feeling that familiar pull between us. “Nope.”

“Then stop overthinking it and sit still,” he muttered, grabbing my hips “Your moving to much and your not gonna like where that leads you” He whispered into my ear sending a shiver down my spine.

If Matt was letting me sit here without a fight, I wasn’t about to question it.

When we got back to the dorm, Nick immediately claimed Chris’s room, muttering something about needing a good night’s sleep after dealing with “party chaos.” Chris just rolled his eyes and doordashed a late-night snack, leaving Matt and me alone in our dorm.

As I kicked off my boots and flopped onto the couch, Matt hovered by the door for a moment before finally speaking.

“You wanna watch a movie or something?” he asked, his voice casual but not dismissive.

I glanced up at him, a little surprised. “Yeah, sure. What are we watching?”

He shrugged, already flipping through the streaming options. “Whatever you want.”

We settled on a horror movie neither of us had seen before. Matt grabbed a blanket from his bed and threw it over us as he took the spot next to me on the couch.

Maybe it was the leftover buzz from the party, or maybe it was how he’d stood up for me earlier, but I couldn’t shake the electricity between us.

About halfway through the movie, I couldn’t focus anymore. I was too aware of the way his arm brushed mine every time he shifted or how his jaw tightened during a tense scene.

Without thinking, I turned to look at him. His eyes were locked on the screen, his face unreadable as always. Something about his calm, controlled demeanor drove me insane.

And then I did it.

I leaned over and kissed him.

It wasn’t planned, wasn’t calculated—I just went for it. My lips pressed softly against his, and for a moment, he didn’t move. I froze, suddenly wondering if I’d made a mistake.

But then, his hand moved to my cheek, and he kissed me back. Slowly, deliberately, like he wanted to make sure I felt every second of it. His lips were warm and soft, and when he pulled back, his thumb lingered on my skin, tracing a gentle line along my jaw.

“What the hell was that?” he asked, his voice low and gruff, but there was no anger in it.

I shrugged, trying to play it cool even though my heart was racing. “I felt like it.”

He smirked faintly, his hand still on my face. “You’re unbelievable.”

“And yet you kissed me back,” I shot back, leaning in again.

This time, he didn’t hesitate. His hand slid to the back of my neck, pulling me closer as our lips met again, deeper, more intense. The movie played on in the background, forgotten, as we stayed there on the couch, lost in the moment.

I waste no time opening my mouth and letting his tongue explore every corner and crevice. He kissed me desperately and with such passion that had me curling my toes while I moaned into his mouth.

His hands leave my cheeks and travel down my body; feeling up every curve as if he was trying to memorize it. At last, his hands find their place on my hips and pulls me on top of him. The only thing between us was our sweatpants and hoodies and I wanted nothing more in that moment than to rip it off.

I bring my own hands up and thread them through his wavy and dark locks. I tug at his hair slightly and he groans into my mouth, sending vibrations down my throat. I press against him even closer.

At this point, every part of me that could be touching him, was touching. But it still wasn’t enough. I wanted to feel him on every single inch of my bare and aching body.

Matt is the first to pull away. Both of us gasp for air without breaking eye contact. The movie had ended and the credits were rolling so I could barely see him at first but my eyes had adjusted to the dark and I could now make out every beautiful and delicate feature he had.

Before I had any time to really admire him, Matt stood up, carrying me with him and pushes me back gently against his bed.

I fall onto it and he leans on top of me; forearms placed and holding him up on both sides of my head. He leans down but instead of kissing my lips, he kisses my jaw. He leaves sweet kisses around my cheeks and under my ear.

As he got closer to my neck his tongue started lighting grazing it. I arch my back and curl my toes when he sucks on my sweet spot.

He continues to suck and bite; certain to leave marks. He took his time savoring the moans I was letting out just for him.

My stomach and lower abdomen were pressed against his core from my arched back and I could feel his imprint pressing against me through his sweatpants. It was driving me insane. I bring my hands up and weave them through his hair; pulling at it again.

I let out a whimper when I feel his length twitch against my stomach. My whimpers quickly turn into moans as he starts to slightly move against my lower abdomen and core; creating the desperately needed friction.

I throw my head back and cry out when he pushes against me with such force that my body jolts. He lets out a throaty groan at the same time.

We both lift our heads and look at each other. If that's how we were reacting from simply grinding on each other then I couldn’t begin to imagine how incredible it was going to feel when he was inside me.

He seemed to have the same thought as me because one look into his eyes sends sparks tingling through my body.

“Please, Matt. I need this.” I beg “I need you.”

Whatever chain he was holding himself back on had offically snapped. He strips us both down quickly, leaving me in my bra and underwear and him in his boxers. He grinds against me with the same force and dips his heads down to my neck; sucking and biting even rougher than before.

I moan even louder and arch my hips into him even higher; desperate for any sort of friction that can help relieve the painful desire between my legs. His kisses trail down from my neck to my chest, leaving marks in his wake.

Once he reaches the strap of my black bra, he lifts his head to look at me; a silent request.

I nod even though I know there would be no returning to what we used to be after tonight.

He slowly pulls off the right strap and then the left, making sure to run his fingertips down my body while he did it. Not once did his eyes leave mine until his mouth attached around my peaked breast and he closed his eyes, groaning around me. I clench around nothing as he flicks his tongue over my hardened bud; sucking and grazing his teeth over my nipple.

I squirm underneath him due to the pleasure being so good. He lets go of my left breast and brings his face back up to my jaw; leaving sweet kisses all around that area.

“I can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted to do this” he mumbles into my neck and I whimper at his confession.

If only he knew how badly I had wanted it too- needed it.

Shit, I didn’t even know how badly I had needed it until now.

My core throbs as I feel his erection brush up against my inner thigh. He was so big; practically stretching through his swim shorts. I couldn’t stop myself as I reached down and grabbed his length in my hand, slowly palming it. He let out a raspy moan and one of his arms buckles underneath him.

“S-stop” he stumbles over his words, trying to gain his composure. “I’ll finish way too fast”

Heat starts profusely pooling at my core again. I give it another stroke with my palm and this time he completely drops his head into the crevice of my neck. The only part that wasn’t entirely against me was his hips which he kept raised so my hand could fit in the space between us two.

I was getting more and more turned on every second about how he was becoming so unraveled beneath me.

I had to have more of this.

I lightly brush the tips of my fingernails up his erection through the cloth, earning a loud and shameless groan from the back of his throat.

I was going to explode.

I could feel every one of his groans against my neck as I palmed him slowly. Watching him become undone by my touch was one of the most magnificent things I have ever experienced.

I push him off me and flip over, causing me to straddle him on the bed. His wide eyes and parted lips were enough to suppress my self-consciousness and continue. I trail my fingers down my body gradually, making sure to watch his expressions as I got closer to my entrance.

Just as I was about to reach the hem of my underwear, I stop and run my fingers back up my body and toward my breasts. Matt groans in irritation and throws his head back.

I giggle at his impatience but waste no time lifting a leg and slowly and sensually removing my panties then dropping it onto his lap. Matt is quick to put one hand under my arm and raise me slightly. He grabs my disregarded underwear off of him and throws them across our room.

And now here I was, completely naked and straddling him. I could already feel the hickeys bruising and forming on my breasts and neck. In this position, I was beginning to feel a little insecure so I avert my eyes from the boy underneath me and look straight ahead.

I shiver when I feel Matt’s large palm on my lower stomach. I look back down and see his warm eyes peering up at me, flickering with reassurance. I smile down at him and he smiles back. With new confidence flowing through my veins, I sit up on my knees and begin to pull down his boxers. He throws his head back as the air hits his newly exposed crotch.

A breathless sigh escapes my lips when I pull his shorts completely down, revealing the thick and intimidating length of him.

How is that supposed to fit inside me?

Matt must’ve seen the surprised and slightly panicked look on my face because he chuckles lightly and flips the positions; I'm back on the mattress and he’s on top. I squeeze my eyes in anticipation when I feel the tip brush between my folds.

He does this a couple of times before neither of us could take it anymore, the sexual tension eating away at both of us.

“I’ll go slow, okay?” he whispers. I nod in approval and open my eyes to see him hovering only inches above me. My eyes instantly close again and my mouth gapes open when he pushes the tip in. I desperately grind my hips lower in need of friction. He continues to push into me at an agonizingly slow pace.

I needed more.

“Please, Matt” I whimper “more”

He pauses; hesitating for a moment before sighing and slamming all eleven inches into me with no mercy. I scream out as my walls pulsate and stretch vigorously around him, trying to adapt quickly. He stills inside me, letting me get used to him. Once I get comfortable he pulls out a couple of inches before colliding back into me with the same force.

He almost instantly hits my cervix and I cry out in pain. He was so big that it was unavoidable for him not to hit it but God, it hurt so bad in the best way possible.

He continues to slowly thrust in and out of me with gentle strokes but I didn’t want that. I wanted all of him, everything he had to offer. I wanted to feel him in every corner and crevice of my body. I wanted him so bad and in ways that were so disgusting that there weren’t even words to explain it.

“Don’t hold back,” I moan into his ear and I feel him groan lightly under his breath.

He begins to pick up his pace and my cries grow even louder. I try to contain myself since there are hundreds of other people in the building but I couldn’t control it. Matt brings his hand up to my face and pushes his palm over my mouth; shushing me.

My body rocks with each forceful stroke and I could feel my climax coming soon. I didn’t want this to end. Not yet.

I whisper to him to switch positions which ends up sounding more like a mumble of gibberish. Somehow he hears it and stops immediately. He grabs my back and flips me around onto my hands and knees. He pulls back and without any warning, he smashes every inch of him inside of me again.

“Fuck- oh my god!” I cry out, Matt letting out a gasp while I grip tightly onto the sheets. My eyes water and I clench my jaw. This time it was a little less painful but the strech still hurt. He gives me a second to adjust to his size before pulling nearly all the way out and slowly pushing himself back in even deeper.

My back arches as he brings one of his hands to my head, pushing it into the pillows. The pain quickly is outdone by pleasure. In this position I could feel myself tighten around him.

“Fuck” he groaned, throwing his head back and I was sure he could feel it too. His pace begins to speed up as he brings both his hands to my hips to hold me in place from moving.

The room was filled with the sound of skin slapping and both of our moans and groans. He reaches over me and grabs my neck, pulling me up so my back is flush against his chest. He continues to fuck hard into me as he points to the vanity mirror on my desk across the room.

Once I see it I automatically close my eyes and look down. He leans forward and whispers in my ear “Look at how good you’re taking me”

When I still don't open my eyes he uses the hand around my neck and moves it to my jaw. He grabs it and forces me to look up.

I reluctantly open my eyes and what a sight. I watch through the mirror as Matt takes his other hand and places it between my breasts. He slowly and sensually drags it down my stomach and lower abdomen until reaching my clit. He starts off with slow circles, barely any pressure. My thighs threaten to close at the teasing but he thrusts in and out of me harder, making me spread them even wider. He begins to add more pressure against my clit, still continuing with the slow pace. My whole body shudders and I release a loudy and raspy moan

“You like that?” he groans against my neck. I could only whimper in response. I’ve never seen this side of Matt before but god was I enjoying it. I never wanted it to stop.

Right as I could've sworn that I felt his cock twitch, he abruptly pulls out and flips me over onto my back again. He drops down and shoves himself back inside me while reaching up and grabbing one leg to hold over his shoulder, hitting even deeper in me than before.

I scream out as he thrusts harder and faster into me, so overwhelmed by the pleasure.

“Matt” I choke out between moans.

“Chris make you feel this good?” he asks from above me, looking at me dead in the eyes.

I shake my head from side to side as I squeeze my eyes shut.

“No? Tell me then. Let me hear you say it, Y/N.” He commanded and even with my eyes closed I could hear the smirk in his voice.

“Chris couldn’t make me feel this good.”

His pace picks up and your core tightens. “Yeah? Who does?”

You moan, opening your eyes and peer up into his. “You, Matt.”

His smile is devilish when he responds. “Yeah and thats why he couldn’t make you cum until you saw me, right?”

I nod as I tighten around him at his words.

“Yeah thats what I thought. Fuckin’ pathetic.” He kept fucking his hips into me. Beads of sweat ran along his neck and the veins in his arms were popping out. His dark brown hair was disheveled and his lips were parted in pleasure. His cheeks were red and flustered and his alluring blue eyes were fixed on mine, clouded with lust and I couldn’t help when the knot in my stomach snapped.

Before I could warn him, I let out a loud moan while my nails dig into his back and my legs shake as I finish. But he doesn’t stop there, he keeps at the same pace, thrusting just as rough and deep into my newly sensitive core.

“Matt,” I cry out “Its too much, I can’t”

“Yes you fuckin’ can” He breathed out heavily. I nod through the tears in my eyes due to the pleasure being too good.

He loops his arms around my back and pulls me towards the edge of the bed in a sitting position. I straddle him with him still inside me. He looks at me for a second before shaking his head and pulling me off him.

He takes my hips and flips me around so my back is to him now. He slowly pushes me back down on his throbbing cock. My walls immediately suck him back in and I let out a cry of both pain and pleasure as he hits my cervix.

“That's good baby, you’re doing so good” he comforts and kisses my shoulder as I sit down fully on him, back against his chest.

Normally this would have had me whipping around in confusion since he never would say something like that, but I was too cockdrunk to even fully register it.

Once he’s completely inside me, he brings his hands to my hips and pushes me forward a little. He begins to move my hips up and down as I bounce on him. The pain slowly disappears as he makes gentle thrusts in and out, letting me adjust. Once I become comfortable he starts to go faster and much harder, hitting so deep inside me. He brings one of his hands off my hips and presses on my lower abdomen.

I can feel him grin against my shoulder. “I can feel myself inside you”

This must’ve boosted his confidence because he starts going even harder. At this point I didn’t even need to bounce because of the strength he put behind his thrusts. My whole body jolted with each powerful stroke.

The hand that was on my abdomen comes up and begins to fondle with my breast while the other was positioned at my waist, holding me in place while he fucks into me with no mercy.

I started to tighten around him. Since I was already sensitive from cuming already, it didn't take long for me to get there again. His thrusts become sloppy and slower and he begins to start groaning louder.

My eyes squeezed shut, his name falling from my lips as I released on his cock. The most magnificent and sexual groans leave his mouth and his eyebrows furrow as he twitches and cums inside me.

“God,” he breathes heavily against my neck. Matt was still inside me but I didn't make an effort to move or stand up. I fell back onto him, the back of my head resting in the crook of his neck. Neither of us spoke a word as we were both trying to catch our breaths and recover from our highs.

Slowly, he shifted, pulling out of me with deliberate care, and I winced faintly at the sensation. He didn’t say a word as he sat up, his movements quiet and purposeful. I expected him to just fall back into bed, to leave us tangled in the mess we’d made, but instead, I felt the mattress dip as he stood.

I turned my head slightly to watch him move toward the bathroom, his frame illuminated briefly by the dim light spilling through the doorway. When he came back, he had a warm, damp cloth in his hand. Still silent, his expression unreadable, he knelt beside me and started cleaning me up. His touch was gentle, almost reverent, as if he was afraid of breaking the fragile quiet between us.

My cheeks burned, but I didn’t say anything, too overwhelmed and embarrassed. Once he was done, he discarded the cloth and turned to his dresser, pulling out one of his oversized shirts. Without meeting my gaze, he slipped it over my head, the soft fabric falling around me like a blanket. The shirt smelled like him—warm, clean, comforting—and for some reason, it made my chest tighten.

I sat up slowly, unsure of what to do or say. The weight of the moment hung heavy in the air, and I didn’t want to overstay my welcome, to push past whatever unspoken boundary he might have.

So, I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, intending to slip out quietly and retreat to my own bed. But before I could even take a step, his hand shot out, firm and decisive, grabbing my waist. My breath hitched as he pulled me back toward him, his grip unyielding yet gentle.

“Matt—” I started, but he didn’t let me finish. Without a word, he tugged me back onto the bed, guiding me to lay down beside him. His arm wrapped around my waist, anchoring me to him, and the warmth of his body against mine was impossible to ignore.

I blinked up at him, searching his face for an explanation, but his eyes were soft, his features relaxed, as if this was the most natural thing in the world. He didn’t say anything, and neither did I. Instead, I took his silence as a sign to stay.

Slowly, I let myself sink into the mattress, into him, and his hold on me tightened just slightly, as if to make sure I wouldn’t try to leave again.

The exhaustion from everything we’d just shared began to weigh on me, my eyelids growing heavier by the second. I shifted slightly, nuzzling into the crook of his neck, and his breath hitched against my skin. He exhaled quietly, his voice rough and low.

That was the last thing I heard before sleep claimed me.

tags -

@namelesssav @hanta-seros-wifey @chrisstopherfilmed @larnieboox88 @sturnrc @christmastreecake @tbfaptbfae @emma-sturniolo @2muchofaslvt @sturnioloshottiekay @rockstarchr1s @simply-a-simper

editor -

@ch0llies

[transmascutena]

we watched the black rose musical last night and i'm still thinking about how much akio goes around just.. touching other characters, even in scenes he isn't actually really supposed to be part of. it's a really interesting directing choice. sometimes it's just a touch, like a hand on someone's arm or shoulder, but most of the time he's pushing people. very much like in the show, he is putting the actors (the characters) into the positions he needs them in. only here it's very literal. and instead of just telling them where to be, like a stage director might do, it's physical, hands-on, even kind of violent at times, yet still subtle enough that nobody notices. nobody ever reacts to it, they just move to where he needs them to be, stumbling into place and continuing to play their roles.

and i could talk about exactly who gets pushed when and to where (like how the first and last person he does it to is anthy-as-mamiya, how it's a light push, really just a touch to keep the momentum of what they're already doing going, as opposed to the way he kind of shoves other characters), but the thing that really stood out to me is that the only character he does touch but doesn't ever really push (aside from i think anthy, and i do have a lot of thoughts on the scene where they're dancing together that i may get into in another post) is utena. what he does instead instead is pull her.

in the opening number, there's a moment where it seems like utena is about to walk off-stage (like tokiko does in the scene, because their choreography is mirroring each other. very clever), but before she can, akio grabs her arm and turns her towards the center of the stage instead, where she lies down in her "coffin". the show proper starts, of course, with the once upon a time story of utena meeting the prince, and a recap of the first arc/musical. and of course akio is the one who puts her into position for it. she's still trapped in her coffin.

and, i don't know, there's just something especially unsettling to me about it compared to the pushing. maybe just that it's different from his interactions with every other character. or the contrast between the pushing being more direct and aggressive, compared to him subtly and gently guiding her around the stage, into the chair or closer to him. there's something horribly personal or intimate about it i guess, especially since he often takes her hand to do it.

[nights-at-crystarium]

Fragments - episodes 47-52 author notes

You can find similar breakdown posts on older episodes in my pinned!

Time to recap the first proper wolgraha miniarc. See what you might’ve missed, or simply enjoy the extra content in form of my rambling.

47 stands out as a bit disconnected, floaty, introspective episode fully focusing on Exarch’s pov. I’ve scattered some breadcrumbs for him throughout the entire comic, time to pick those up. He may be an oblivious fool in certain moments, but I believe he wouldn’t keep insisting on staying deaf and blind when evidence’s shoved in his face. So, this moment of recollection and rethinking marks the start of the canon divergence, all of his future actions are colored by this.

Vivi has a dire effect on some people even without trying to manipulate them.

The composition forms a star here :3c

This panel should make their likeness even more obvious, they’re mirror reflections, albeit deliciously twisted ones. Also, the V sign is literally something that Vivi. Just. Does.

Exarch's heard from Vivi himself that they might be the same, Urianger literally tells him to go to a mirror and ponder, but when he does, and tries to look a bit more like he imagines Vivi, he can't stand what he sees in the mirror. They still aren't the same in his heart of hearts, even if reality itself tries to prove otherwise.

Hidden Angst Time! I can only hope that most readers are familiar with the flashback bubbles by now, and that this panel reads as it should: Feo Ul embraces Exarch while pointing out that they’re also being ostracized by their kind. Though the ultimate fae wisdom lies in accepting something the way it is, and just not caring too much.

More under the cut~ 

*rewinds all the way back to episode 1* hehe

“Does a hero have to be happy about his job” is one of my personal fav lines so far, I think it hits hard, pointing not only at Vivi, but at Exarch as well, and the visual supports it. I think this encapsulates Exarch’s ideology.

Exarch’s GASP could be interpreted as saying GASP out loud, which only makes it funnier.

Vivi carefully plans his entrance in order to make the atmosphere less formal. Approaching normally just wouldn’t do it. Also he just feels relaxed and safe to be silly. Remember how lowkey he was since his arrival to the First? His behavior all but contradicted what I said and showed about him in the ARR arc and outside of the comic.

Well, that’s in the past now. He’s finished assessing the situation and concluded that it’s okay to be more himself.

Feo Ul's upset that Exarch used his “radar” to detect Vivi’s ambush while they’d just used a similar ability to make sure that no emet-selchs are around.

If you catch a flirty vibe from Vivi in this episode, you're correct.

Vivi when he's remotely interested in a man:

My flavor of lampshading the obvious exposition dump. Oh Exarch, you asked for this, no take-backsies.

Another few hard-hitting questions from Exarch. It's easy to gloss over these, but if you slow down and think, it's decent angst material. Has anyone ever been concerned about Vivi's feelings, or was it more convenient to look away, even if intently, even if both sides knew they're better off not talking about that, for there's indeed no wol replacement. What good does acknowledging the situation if you can’t change it.

This's Vivi's memory, thus he appears small against the looming forms of the world leaders. Rigid, formal, impersonal. Raha's memories of the Ironworks seem to have a different vibe, despite all the parallels of the duty imposed by the world on one special guy. Also yeah I do wanna make my own version of the 8UC timeline and characters someday, for now these are just random characters that I consider as placeholders. And the dunmeshi cameo x’D

Yes, he mocks the people that he's saved. He's VERY frustrated with his job.

I offer you a fun game: spot all the mannerisms that make Vivi and Emet so alike. I genuinely never thought about this until this year, while this scene's pretty damn old, i.e. Vivi's always been like this, it precedes my Emet brainrot.

I swear that this line also was there before my Emet brainrot, but now it makes for a hilarious kind of foreshadowing.

You could already tell how "fit" he is for solving trolley problems.

This’s his “oops I talked too much shit” face.

The way Exarch just quietly TURNS and LOOKS at Vivi cracks me up. Don't undermine the tone with random jokes, dammit. But is this random? I’ve already analyzed this moment somewhere but for the sake of keeping important things in one place: they wrestle for control here. Exarch winds up for something serious, while Vivi wants to steer the convo towards more casual. It does somewhat lower the tension, though Exarch doesn’t relinquish his lead in the convo.

This doesn’t save him from becoming Frank forever from here on.

This miniarc’s rich with raw, hard-hitting words, so I’ll bring this up again.

We’re finally getting the explanation and context for a lot of previous episodes:

And the following episodes only help driving this point home. Vivi already sees the First as a viable escape from the Source with all of its shitty people and endless problems.

"This's why I... enjoy my time away from the Source": even at this seemingly high level of trust between them Vivi won't openly tell Exarch about his plans to stay here, a variable he doesn't want to become a risk.

Yes, he does an entirely calculated and strategic flop. A literal thirst trap.

Meme provided by my discord server:

Vivi casts provoke, it's..... not effective

^ This’s one of my personal fav exarchs I’ve ever drawn DADDY PLS

A panel that everyone loved to bits :>

I pair angst with other flavors to make it fun and non-repetitive. It's not "boohoo I can never kiss my hero, the world will end if I do, I'm so aggravated with myself", it's the hooded Exarch (duty) being mad at the unhooded Exarch (human), and delivering the same notion in a fun exchange. You can't help but laugh at the comical chibi violence, at the same time you acknowledge that it's a pretty fucked up act of suppressing one's innate human desires.

It's not a date, they just sit and talk <- the water in which Exarch is being slowly boiled.

I rarely talk about the visuals, but here I intended to make it look like a magical moment frozen in time. It's immersive, whimsical, full of color and movement. Despite the perceived warmth, the composition splits them apart, they're alone together. It’s still Raha’s pov, Vivi doesn’t seem to have any fond memories of the Source at all, we only hear about the past from his current jaded self.

An in-universe acknowledgment of the ARR arc lasting only 11 episodes x’D Though it’s all by design, it was meaningful only to Raha, while being a forgettable blip in time for Vivi.

Episode 52 opens with.... *drumroll*

NIP SLIP

I lovingly rendered that nip and I’ll make you look at it.

Ibuprofen meme would be the first thing that comes to mind, but consider the better/worse caption: "come to daddy". In all seriousness though, it’s a cool panel that I wanted to appreciate again. This IS Vivi’s pov.

The grimy beaten up Vivi creates questions that are answered in episode 53, which is yet to be released publicly at the moment of writing this. Some episodes, like 52-53 and 42-43, come in pairs that only make sense together due to the non-linear storytelling.

Yes this’s Aymeric, no I won’t say anything else :’> One thing that’s worth noting is the face Vivi makes here. And the distant, emotionless tone with which he recalls the moment of his own near-death.

Lemme spell it out even more plainly: Vivi romanticizes the moment he almost died. Exarch just happened to be present in that moment, and Vivi latched on to him as someone who would grant him escape, freedom, peace.

“A kindly wizard from fairytales”. I regret to inform you that we have two delusional fucks on our hands. Both see each other as some kinda dreamt up, idealized, mythical figures.

This miniarc isn’t over yet, but I’m wrapping up the recap here. Thanks for reading till the end~

[lakesbian]

What was he doing?  Why was he so focused on getting Bitch to admit it was over? Reputation, yet again.  He needed to salvage this situation, and the surest way to do that, to recoup his losses and come out of this looking okay, would be to get the meanest, toughest, most notorious of us to bend at the knee and concede defeat. He really didn’t know Bitch, though. She pulled her cheap plastic dog mask off and threw it to one side.  It was only a formality, really, since her face and identity were public knowledge.  Her smile, as it spread across her face, wasn’t the most attractive.  Too many teeth showing. “Lung underestimated her, too,” she told him, looking at me.

okay, continued forcing myself to spend time analyzing rachel lindt instead of letting her live in my worm blindspot for no reason. to recap: at this point in the story, she's gone on the ABB raid with rachel & had that gay little moment where rachel gave her her jacket when she was cold walking back home + got so close to taylor to inspect her injuries from lung that taylor thought she was going to kiss her. it had deep connotations of blossoming romance and taylor narrated some shit about still kind of being cold despite the jacket but the warmth in her core keeping her warm all the way back to the loft. now, although taylor is still only consciously ranking rachel at "i don't hate her" in her mind, rachel has now started doing shit like this.

one of the primary rachel/taylor theses is that taylor isn't rachel's dog, rachel is taylor's dog. it's established over the course of the worm that she trusts taylor completely implicitly. there's the part in the behemoth fight where the entire world is falling apart around them and rachel is still smug and happy about taylor having a plan. there's the part at the end that makes all of us want to smash our heads into the wall:

she trusts taylor in the same way a dog would trust their owner even on the table for euthanasia. she sees taylor as smarter than she is not in a self-deprecatory way--there are plenty of people who you might call smarter than rachel that she'll happily call morons--but because consistently, time and time again, taylor goes up against smart pieces of shit who are trying to fuck the undersiders over and figures out what to do about it. and this scene here, where she's responding to armsmaster's attempt to put her down by insisting that he's underestimating taylor, seems to be the first instance of rachel's trust in taylor shining through. in fact, this happens even before taylor considers them to be friends, before they've had any significant bonding. one of the very first positive things rachel feels about taylor--maybe even the first positive thing--is that, when people are putting her and her team down, when odds look grim, taylor can be trusted to solve it. it's actually, like, kind of bonkers compelling that rachel's first seed of positive response to taylor isn't "well, actually, i guess she seems nice" but "my teammate taylor could beat up this dickhole armsmaster."

it's worth explicitly noting, by the way, that rachel interprets smiles as like dog growls. the reason her smile is a little too wide with too many teeth is because it's not actually a proper smile. it's rachel being a growling dog, placing all of her trust in taylor. I Love You Rachel Lindt

[soullesssenpai]

WWE Titan Takedown Post-Mania State of the Union

Hi, Intrepid Viewers!

Happy Tuesday! We now live in a post-WrestleMania world, and a few headlines directly involved our righteous wrestlers, so I thought it might be a good idea to do a little rundown/recap of what happened at WrestleMania and how it impacted the ongoing storylines our wrestlers are involved in!

As an aside before we get started, thanks so much to all the folks who have reached out with questions and/or reblogged previous titan takedown/wwe posts of mine!

On to Mania! So, as I previously noted, three out of four of our righteous wrestlers were on the card for mania: bayley, kofi, and xavier all had matches when I wrote my original post, but boy have things changed since then! Let’s start with the less complicated news: The New Day are NEW tag champs!

That’s right, our boys (who are still VERY heelish, rocking lots of sparkles and saying everybody needs to get on their knees and thank god for them) took the WWE Tag Team Championship titles off the War Raiders in a solid match during night 1! They won and literally sprinted out of the ring and up the ramp, like true chickenshit heels. This actually marks Kofi and Xavier’s seventh reign as tag champs, the most times anyone in wwe history has held them. New!! Day Rocks!!!

Talking about heel work is a good opportunity for a little wrestling 101/explainer, since a few folks asked about faces/heels and fan reactions. In wrestling, the best heels are the ones that make you love to hate them. Dominik Mysterio is a GREAT example - he just won the intercontinental title, and gets booed to all hell every time he walks out, but he’s one of the most cherished wrestlers in the company. Fans boo as a form of love for the really good heels, letting them know you see the character work they’re doing and you’re eating it up. When the new day comes out and the crowd boos, or kofi’s mother disowns him (which happened recently) it’s all in good fun.

That being said, there certainly are heels who are being booed because the audience hates them. Logan paul was also there this weekend, which is all i want to say about that.

But on to the slightly messier situation: the Bayley of it all! This time last week, Bayley was scheduled to challenge for the WWE Tag Team Championships with Lyra Valkyria. Though they’re not really a proper tag team (more of a mentor/mentee duo that’s still figuring out their chemistry) Bayley and Lyra did go through a gauntlet to earn their title shot against the champions, Liv and Raquel.

We were all set for Bayley and Lyra, until during Friday night Smackdown, they showed footage backstage of Lyra tending to Bayley, who had been mysteriously attacked. (wrestling 101 note, bayley was not attacked in real life. This is what you’d call an ‘angle.’) with Bayley writhing in pain on the ground, a distraught Lyra is told that she’s got 24 hours to find a new tag team partner.

I might’ve accidentally spoken this into existince for saying I hoped she’d return in my last post, but when the time came for Lyra’s tag match versus Liv and Raquel, her mystery partner ended up being none other than her fellow Irishwoman and mentor, Becky Lynch. I could write essays on essays about Becky and her importance to wrestling, but she’s been away for a year, so this was a big return.

Becky and Lyra went on to *win* their match, making them the new WWE tag team champions. Because Lyra is also currently the reigning intercontinental champion, a lot of folks were wondering what the plan was, because even though she and Becky are very close, they’re also not really a tag team, and it’s a strange choice to put a singles champion (Lyra) into the tag division.

Nonetheless, Lyra and Becky showed up to Monday Night Raw last night as the new champs - Liv and Raquel invoked their rematch clause, and got a chance to take their titles back. The rematch between Liv/Raquel and Becky/Lyra ends with Liv pinning Lyra, meaning Lyra and Becky lost their belts after just a day. We then got a heel turn!!! Becky, angry that Lyra lost them the titles, attacked her protege, turning against her.

Shock! Betrayal! Becky, how could you!? (Side note, I prefer Becky as a heel, and her husband Seth also just turned heel, so very excited about this development). What does this mean for Bayley, you all ask? I’ll give the in-kayfabe answer/prediction first, which is that Bayley will likely disappear from tv for a few weeks before returning to feud with Becky. She’ll get her lick back and probably pick up her feud with Roxanne Perez, who’s still running around on Raw.

However, some recent interviews Bayley’s done have definitely given some insight into the situation. There was (understandably) some outcry after Bayley was taken off of the WrestleMania card so last minute. It’s a big deal to have a mania match, and for a veteran like her to be yoinked away like that sucks.

Again, I could write oodles and oodles about how wrestling contracts work and i don’t want to get into the weeds on things, but this is kind of the latest development in an ongoing thing where Bayley isn’t getting the respect she’s due. She’s one of the four horsewomen of WWE, but as she said in the interview, she feels like she isn’t on the same level as the others (even if she absolutely is).

So that’s the titan takedown state of the union! New Day are heel champs, Bayley has been “attacked” and we’re waiting for her return/see what her next move is. If you want my crackpipe theory, I’m hoping she heads to All Elite Wrestling soon, but that’s a discussion for another day.

[starberry-cupcake]

Welcome back!! I hope you're doing well and, if not, I hope my silly ramblings can make your day somewhat better, like the wildcats used to say: we're all in this together ♥

previously, in harrowcita del 9:

this happened

for those of you recently tuning in, this is the tag of all the ramblings

also, I'm officially in the sixth house now, palmolive can't stop me

CHAPTER 46

we're back inside the emperor's bolthole, which is infested

this is what happens when you have a lyctor orgy without the proper protection

gideon is doing her very best to fight the infestation of herald bees swarming and attacking her

she's in harrow's feeble small kitten baby body, so she's dying a lot

I'm gonna try to represent this visually

gideon keeps apologizing to harrow for getting her bits chewed off and her insides pouring out

and puts emphasis on things she wants harrow to remember

"I saw it eat your thumb—these details are important, so keep up with me—and your thumb was back in the next half minute"

"Child, that bee smashed you"

"I touched your intestines, which is usually what, fourth date"

me:

so, gideon takes off harrow's excess bones, which are no use to her, and goes further into the emperor's infested bolthole, where she finds mercygirl

mercygirl thinks gideon is harrow at first and, turns out, she was the one who stabbed her

these lyctors istg

can't trust any of them

mercygirl thinks harrow should be grateful that she stabbed her

and she was aware that harrow had "stuffed the soul of the cavalier in the back of her brain"

NOW WE'RE GONNA GET INTO SOME TERRITORY THAT MAKES ME GO ABSOLUTELY BERSERK, SO BEAR WITH ME

I NEED TO GET MY NOTES BACK FROM MY PREVIOUS RECAPS FOR THIS

she asks what happened with gideon's eyes and, as we have seen in the previous gideon-centric chapter, gideon's eyes are in harrow's face atm, if memory serves

"You're not her—she isn't driving you—but you have her eyes. Why? When they showed me your corpse I didn't think to check the eyes"

"I thought I knew what you were, though I didn't want to believe it..."

now listen, we're starting to tie some loose ends and some of those loose ends are linked very closely to my previous theories

I have been considering the Commander Wake is Gideon's Mom and Has a Personal Connection To Gideon The First and Is The One Connected With The Harrow Notes In Canaan AU for a while now

I need to link the specific recaps where I said this because I need to be transparent about where my brain was at

Evidence A, Evidence B, Evidence C, Evidence D

there's probably more but those are pretty clear

I swear to god if I was right about this I'm gonna screencap my own recap and put it here when the time comes

I've been marinating this one for months

I actually forgot how much of that I had written down in the recaps until I re-read them

mercygirl says that she thought the commander was a bad girl workaholic who put business before family, that she made her "the dolls" and she must have "played silly buggers with the emission" and that "gideon was on her tail"

"And then Gideon ruined everything. Then the commander ruined everything. Then you ruined everything. This could have been over eighteen years ago"

apparently gideon the first was "obsessed" with the commander, which accounts for some of the notes harrow read

I'LL GET BACK TO THAT WHEN WE GET TO THE SLEEPER, MY THEORIES CONTINUE

mercygirl starts calling gideon all sorts of names, including mutant, and keeps being bothered about her eyes

"Lipochrome. Recessive. You are the evidence. He lied to us...and you are all the proof I needed" "Cytherea would have known as soon as she looked at you"

is gideon the first gideon's dad??????? I mean, I always though he might have Something with the mom but my money was on gideon being made through science rather than Traditional Means

I mean, having lyctor genes in some way would account for gideon being a demigod, something I said with those words when I was reading gideon

also, remember when not!dulcinea told gideon she was prettier than the other gideon?? because I've never forgotten

mercygirl confirms that gideon the first was sent to kill gideon's mom

who, according to mercygirl, would have hated to be called a mom

mamá luchona intensifies

all of which aligns with my theory very nicely so far

she calls gideon more names, including "abomination, you heresy, you failed ambition nineteen years too late"

gideon reacts not wanting mercygirl to touch her instinctively

man, my theories are RIGHT THERE to be fully connected I'm BITING THE DESK

but there's no time for any more talk because mercygirl is trying to kill gideon in harrow's body

but she is stopped

she is shot

by not!dulcinea

but I don't think this is not!dulcinea, I previously mentioned her maybe being used by someone, not sure if it's possession or being used or what's going on but I don't think this is her

I thought about gideon the first being the one to do it but if he wanted harrow dead, I'm not sure he'd save gideon now

not!dulcinea says "with a tone that wasn't" hers: "goodbye"

gideon ends the chapter with "what the fuck is going on?"

CHAPTER 47

we're back at canaan au and it's time to perform an exorcism

harrow has a new note

I've been connecting those notes to gideon's mom possibly commander wake (as linked above)

the latest note continues to add to my theory

"end of the line. falling. oxygen can't last the distance and won't redirect power from the payload. instead I will make you watch every moment as I get the last privilege you cannot enjoy you bygone son of a bitch. I hope you're both as sorry as I am."

I still think this is gideon's mom because that's how she died, I mean, she got to the ninth in a suit without air and gideon still had some, allegedly

I've been thinking that one of the two people involved in the situationship triangle described in the notes was gideon the first, and that maybe the other was dr reverend emperor john

he's the most likely to be a bygone son of a bitch, so maybe I'm right

so, if harrow connects the notes with the spirit that's haunting her

and I'm connecting them to gideon's mom....

what if it's her that's haunting harrow?????

I mean, Waker

I NEED TO STOP GETTING INTO THEORY TANGENTS

anyway, all of the ghoulie ghostie friends are getting together for a sleepover exorcism

I didn't use this when I should have, back when the different aus were going by, but here it is

real!dulcinea says "Pal always said I'd be the death of him. And I was..."

he died being a weenie but he's not all the way dead, so it's fine

harrow questions why everyone wants to help her but everyone's totally fine with all this, for different reasons

real!dulcinea is "horny for revenge" (that's a tshirt for the seventh girlies right there)

protozoa is there because duty is his full personality

abby is really grateful to be asked to help (she also really likes tombs, very lara croft of her)

magnus loves his wife

ortus wants a redemption arc and now has a polycule

martita is behaving better than judith

abby asks harrow if there's anything she can remember from the slasher waker sleeper to try to pinpoint who tf it is

there's a suit, blood, a gun and gideon's sword, which is the only thing harrowcita recognizes and doesn't know where it comes from

my money is on gideon's mom, commander wake, probably also the woman in the shuttle poster that harrow saw but didn't recognize back when she met camilla

I'M PUTTING MORE CHIPS IN MY BETS EVEN IF I GET NO MORE INFO RN

harrow is very interested in how abby and magnus make it work as a married couple who are also a necro and a cav

I wonder why she's so interested

anyway, everything goes to shit on the exorcism

like, it goes really, really badly

group project off the rails bad

I mean, they didn't even have blood

apparently the spirit is also tethered to an object out there (the sword??????? possibly?????)

and she (she's a SHE) is pretty much invincible and shooting everyone and performing parkour while she's at it

harrow says camilla would be impressed, which is the highest praise

the sleeper waker slasher potentially gideon's mom (but not sure because it hasn't been confirmed yet) calls harrow by her name, but in a way that sounds like she's never said it before

she says it like a curse, which maybe means she knows, to some degree, how harrow was made????

she's basically doing whatever she wants over here, shooting ghosts, punching ghosts, throwing them around, regenerating, not bleeding, pulling guns out of thin air

I mean, ok, we got it, calm down lady

where was this energy when it was time to kill the emperor

she says there's "no magic" there and that "she's been doing this for years"

she wants harrow, so she can kill her and use her body to "finish it"

WHICH MAYBE MEANS KILLING THE EMPEROR???

OH MAN I DO WANT THAT TO HAPPEN

BUT NOT AT THE COST OF HARROW

also, mrs potentially gideon's mom, even if harrow dies, there's also gideon in the body right now so, it's a bit crowded atm

maybe find another way to kill the emperor

use not!dulcinea instead, if you can get the current tenant to leave

the chapter ends with: "ortus cleared his throat"

MAN, I HOPE HE DROPS SOME POETRY LINES, WE SURELY NEED THAT

and that's it for today!!!!!things are certainly heating up in the emperor's bolthole!!!! see you soon for the next installment, fingers crossed for my theories!!!

[neplusultros]

war is the father of all things

thinking a little bit about yoru as a parent. obviously, makima-as-the-mother imagery was key to part 1 both visually and as part of its ongoing interrogation of abuse, love, and the family structure. similarly, though yoru as peer and lover to denji is a popular framing (particularly after chapters 191-193), i think there is a lot to be gained by reading yoru not from denji's view in which she is a possible equal, but from asa's perspective of her as a mother figure.

spoilers through chapter 193 follow.

if you're here voluntarily reading this post you probably don't need an explainer on the makima-mother stuff so here's a quick recap image

clockwise from top-left: fujimoto interview with shueisha, ch. 82, ch. ch. 76, anime ED1, ch. 82

wow! what a shitty mom.

a lot of analysis about yoru and asa and denji situates and investigates yoru as either 1) a peer (to the extent a devil can be a peer) or 2) a part of asa's personality. either way, she's considered and framed as someone roughly on par with asa and denji, not least because just as they are teenagers struggling to find their place in the world and understand romantic feelings, yoru seems to be doing a lot of the same! the visual imagery contributes; not only is yoru positioned against denji as an equal (versus makima looming over him, or crouching to speak to him), she's also made an equal to the missing asa via the empty chair. a lot has (understandably) been made of contrasting this against, again, makima and denji.

ch. 12, ch. 193

but of course, yoru is not just a peer to these teenagers. on one level, this is true because she is an ageless and ancient devil. though we don't have a sense of how "old" potoo-war is when it first meets asa, it's clearly not "young"; it remembers that it used to be more powerful and also that nuclear weapons existed, so clearly it has at least some understanding of its past.

but more than that, it's true because yoru's not like other teens. she's a mom. a cool mom.

ch. 176

in a very real way, from moment 1, as soon as war (let's call her by her maiden name, shall we?) shows up, she's mothering asa. wake up, welcome to the world, now go to school or you'll be punished. are kids bullying you? i'll deal with them. i'm here to give you tough love, but i'll also tell you when you're being too hard on yourself.

ch. 99, ch. 100, ch. 121

war is making a conscious effort to teach asa how to behave, to impart values to her, and it's generally working. of course, the realization that one is behaving just like one's mother might be a point of filial frustration and irritation just as it is a point of parental pride.

ch. 145

in this frame, it's easy to see war not just as a facet of asa, but as someone external to her that is protective of her, that wants what's best for her and also wants her to get what she wants, but can also be impatient, demanding, overrides her autonomy, and acts like she never knows best. she doesn't just want to help asa achieve her desires, but to make sure her desires are the proper ones.

ch. 124, ch. 168, ch. 135

but of course, some degree of discord exists because asa's concerns are not 100% how war perceives them, and the heart wants what it wants. children don't live in the same world their parents imagine they do. a child can see rules and invisible lines a parent doesn't, particularly with respect to their own relationships and social life. and even when they're wrong about those, their feeling a line has been crossed might actually be communicating something more complex and sensitive about their own problems, or their efforts to form an identity.

ch. 168, ch. 113

i don't think any of this motherhood framing is all that accidental. in fact, i think it's there from the very start. when war makes a contract with asa, it exactly parallels how she thinks about motherhood.

ch. 177, ch. 98

"children are their parents' property, no?"

"if you want to live, your body will be mine."

being (re)born is neither a voluntary task nor an independent one: a child is entirely at their caretakers' mercy until they are capable of fending for themselves, and of course, would not have been born if their parents hadn't conceived a child. to many parents, this state of contingency and guardianship implies ownership, which implies the right to abandon or destroy. "i brought you into this world. i can take you out of it." war might care for her children. but ultimately, their lives and their bodies are hers to do with as she pleases. if she wants you to do something, she will steal your body and do it for you. the ultimate helicopter parent.

when read in this way, war's fascination with denji can feel like she read her daughter's diary and is aggressively and disastrously intervening in her personal life. she's taking it on herself to teach asa's crush about relationships and courtship, and even make sure he's properly fed.

ch. 192, ch. 193

of course, in doing so, she's usurping asa's place, enacting not what asa wants, but what she thinks asa should want (a kiss, a handjob, a date, sex). the daughter vanishes entirely, erased and replaced by her mother's facsimile of her.

ch. 193

to be clear, i don't think this does much to change or negate the reading that yoru is experiencing her own feelings for denji. if anything, i think it adds interesting nuances and wrinkles to it as not just a fight internal to asa, but as a complex case of what is almost covert incest.

i do think one advantage of this reading, however, is that it centers asa's relationship to yoru. most conversations lately have focused on yoru's relationship to denji, for understandable reasons: it's been the main action of the manga for the last few chapters, and asa has been intentionally sidelined.

i believe that it is extremely intentional the last major interaction asa and war have before everything kicks into high gear emphasizes asa's horrified response to her philosophy on parenting.

ch. 177

and almost immediately afterward, war exploits asa's affection for her to override her control of her body and do exactly what asa wants her not to do.

ch. 179. read right to left. yes i know the pages are on the wrong sides.

your mother doesn't trust you. she thinks you're weak. she takes control of your life, tells you where to go and what to do. she forces you to go on a date with someone you don't even like, then berates your performance the whole time. she tries to erode your personality and desires to replace them with hers. when you object, she tells you not to think. you can do nothing but watch as she exploits her other children and hurts people. when you try to stop her, she leverages your real affection for her to guilt you into acquiescing. either she's developed feelings for your crush and is sincerely trying to have sex with him, or she's pimping you out to him for her own gain.

what's a girl to do?

[bellabrady]

Why many people dislike Tommy Kinard

Listen, I don't like to try and dictate what characters others can like. However, I do find it concerning how quick so many people are to forgive a bigot who didn't even get a proper redemption. So, especially for those who simply don't really remember Tommy, here's a quick recap of him:

Let's start with Chimney Begins. Tommy is one of the firefighters at the 118 when Chimney becomes part of the team. The first thing Tommy says when Chim arrives is 'Hey Eli, did you forget to tip the delivery guy?' On its own, this isn't really bad, because it could very much just be a harmless joke. But in combination with Tommy's behavior throughout the rest of the episode, one could argue the comment has racist undertones. But this one's up to interpretation so let's move on.

Although not explicitly stated, it's very obvious the 118 captain is racist which is reflected in the way he treats him: he only lets him do annoying chores, is a jerk towards him, actively isolates him, and so on.

The rest of the team, including Tommy, does nothing to try and change this. In fact, they actively take part in isolating him too, for example by letting him sit by himself at a tiny table instead of the group table while they eat. Even when Chimney attempts to talk to them, everyone but Eli (the paramedic who ends up training Chim) blatantly ignores him.

One time, Chim and Tommy are alone in the locker room and Chim says: "Hey man, let's build a bridge here." Tommy doesn't even react. Chim keeps making suggestions of things they could talk about, like movies or sports, to which Tommy still doesn't react except by rolling his eyes. Chim then asks: "You just really don't like me much, do you?" and Tommy responds: "If I thought about you at all, honestly, I probably wouldn't."

Mind you, he doesn't even know Chimney and yet he's pretty sure he wouldn't like him. What exactly is he basing that on? Race, perhaps? (Tommy is very close to some other guys on the team by the way.)

Eli tells Chim that the treatment isn't personal and that the reason everyone is so distant is because in this job, friends die and that the team isn't just gonna give Chim their friendship until they earn his respect. "You don't name a puppy until you know it's gonna pull through."

In my opinion this is absolute bullshit though. You cannot tell me every single probie at the 118 has been treated this way for weeks (maybe months? I don't remember exactly). Also, keeping someone at a distance doesn't mean you have to treat them like literal dirt. It's also worth mentioning that once the captain, Tommy and his best friend leave the 118, no probie seems to ever be treated this way again. So if it's about the nature of the job, why wasn't it like this for everyone? So, despite what Eli said, I think Chim's treatment was definitely caused by racism.

Eventually, Chimney is finally allowed out on calls and risks his life to save Tommy's, which basically makes Tommy go: "Oh hey! Maybe I could treat this guy like a human being?" He thanks him for saving his life and from this point on they're friends. I don't know about you guys, but personally I think someone who doesn't see it fit to treat you like a person until you save their life doesn't seem like a very great guy.

Let's move on to Hen Begins. The 118 is still under the same captain, who is also a misogynist. Unlike the racism, this isn't only implied but confirmed.

I've seen people argue that Tommy can't be blamed for not standing up to his captain because that's his boss. And yet, when the captain says "This is our new diversity hire" about Hen, Chimney says, "You know, Cap, there's another way to say that," which immediately proves that Tommy could stand up to him as well, and simply doesn't have the guts.

They treat Hen similarly to the way they treated Chim. Tommy, along with everyone else but Chim, for example throws some gear on the ground before Hen's feet so she takes care of it, not saying so much as a single word to her in the process.

Chim tries to make conversation with Hen and says "I would've bet money that you were from the east coast, you just kinda have that vibe." Hen laughs and says "Thank you for the compliment?" to which Tommy replies: "New York bitchiness is a compliment?"

He doesn't even know Hen and she's done nothing that could be seen as 'bitchy.' Just some good ol' fashioned misogyny. Chim also recognizes that comment for what it is immediately because he goes "woah, woah, nobody said anything like that, come on." Tommy only huffs in annoyance as a response.

The captain then goes on a rant about how training female firefighters is a waste of money and Chim once again stands up for Hen, unlike everybody else, including Tommy, who just lets the misogyny stand.

It isn't until Hen rescues someone on a call that Tommy and his friend admit they wouldn't have found in time, that they finally treat her like a person. You'd think they'd have learned from Chimney that maybe people shouldn't need to prove themselves to you in order for you to treat them like a human being, but apparently not.

Ultimately, the team submits complaints against the captain and supports Hen but if you ask me, this should've happened a lot sooner and not only after they deemed her worthy.

And that's pretty much all we see of Tommy, except for some short scenes in Bobby Begins Again in which he just interacts with his team until he leaves for a different station at the end of the episode. There's no redemption, no proper apology and, if you ask me, considering the fact that he treated Hen the same as Chim, there's also no development.

And yet there are people who will defend this man with their lives as if 90% of his screentime wasn't him being a bigot or at best a coward without the guts to stand up to his bigoted captain.

So yes, personally I think liking Tommy Kinard is weird.

[pandorasprongs]

EPILOGUE | you and me, always and forever.

'it's nice to have a friend' masterlist + playlist | previous chapter

PAIRING: jamie tartt x fem!reader

WORD COUNT: 3.7k

SUMMARY: jamie and reader go to liv's wedding and after, jamie has a magical moment of his own prepared.

WARNINGS: language

A/N: and welcome to the final chapter and epilogue of inthaf! i can't thank you all enough for reading and enjoying this story, and joining me on this ride. from the title and summary, i think you can tell what's going to happen and i hope you enjoy their happy ending!

"Marry me today, so you can get double the gifts!" Jamie proposed enthusiastically, but you shook your head profusely. Not because you thought it was a bad idea — you two were always trying to come up with ways to get more presents, — but because you knew you were both too young to get married.

Jamie, both disappointed by you turning down his proposal and the idea of more gifts, stands up from where the two of you were seated in the backyard and starts marching back inside the house with purpose. "I'll ask Auntie then if she'll let me marry you!"

"Jamie, you're such a dork! Hold on!" You chased after him.

"Oh, honey it was so sweet and so cute! He was so shy about it, too, you know. And I know you didn't like it when I mentioned it, and you were blushing so much even if you said you didn't want to marry Jamie! Oh, if they could see you two now, on the way to a real proposal this time..." 

Your mom trails off at the end, after going on a whole recap of the first time Jamie proposed to you (four more instances followed, each one getting less and less serious as you two got older).

"Mom, I'm glad you're happy that Jamie and I are together and I know you've been wanting grandkids, but please slow down. It hasn't even been a year!" You remind her, plopping down on your couch in exasperation. 

You're not really sure either how you and your mom got to the topic of marriage. You called her to ask about their travel details since they were coming to visit in a few weeks and you mentioned brownies once, which led your mom down a slippery train of thought.

Your mom sighs into the phone, "Oh sweetheart, you know you and Jamie's relationship has been a long time coming. That boy has loved you since you were kids! I'm surprised he's even waited eight months at this point before popping the question. I mean, don't you want to marry him?"

"Of course, I do!" You answer a lot faster than you intended, so you take a moment before continuing. "It's just that I don't want you to get in my head so much that I end up pressuring Jamie to propose when he isn't ready." Which really was the truth. You and Jamie had never been happier than you were now after you two started dating. 

After he recovered from the injury after the Man City game, Jamie took you on a proper first date. You went to a formal restaurant and had a great time, but the two of you were already hanging out since that morning. The "date" was just the end of an already great day spent with him, and that's usually what most of the days you were together would be like.

Today was just like that, though you would be a little busier compared to your usual days since you'd also be a maid of honor for Liv the whole time.

You glance at the clock and suddenly realize you have to start getting ready to leave. "Mom, I have to go now, but remember to send me your schedule, okay? See you soon, love you," you hang up the phone and head to your bedroom to get your dress ready to pack.

Liv had already organized that the bridal party would be getting ready together and you were now running late. You start bolting for the door when it opens wide and you're greeted by your boyfriend with an identical surprised expression on his face.

"Jamie!" You exclaim, before noticing how he's already in his wedding attire, minus the coat which he had hanging on his arm. He looked incredibly handsome and you almost let yourself get distracted by it, but focus back on the wedding. You can let yourself be distracted later tonight. "You didn't have to be this early. We could've just met up at the venue."

"I know, but I wanted to see my beautiful girlfriend before she got too busy to kiss me," Jamie wraps his arms around you and gently kisses you. You appreciated the gesture and deepened the kiss, but pulled back after recalling the time.

"Well then, since you're here, help me carry my bags to the car." You hand him your duffle bag and grab your purse before you two head out. 

Jamie left his car running, which was amazingly still there when you reached it, and you two headed to the venue together. He had brought you to the place enough times when Liv would call while you two were together so that you didn't have to direct him there.

As you two usually did when you were together, you spent the whole time talking about the events that happened when you weren't. On the way, Jamie narrated the new bizarre training sessions with Roy as their new coach and how he always happened to be the main target of the painful ones, to no one's surprise. You then talked about how one of your students nearly caused a biohazard after knocking over multiple trays of cultured bacteria.

You weren't sure how many stories you exchanged till you finally reached the venue and started heading to where the bridesmaids were getting ready. 

"What're you going to do till the wedding starts then?" You ask Jamie as you reach the room, who simply shrugs.

"Eh, I'll find something. Go on, I'll see you later, love," he kisses you on the cheek and smiles before heading back to the car.

You smile to yourself, before heading into the already hectic dressing room. There were already several people there getting ready, so you silently make your way to Liv to cater to her every need. She was never one to be a bridezilla, but any person would be stressed out on their wedding day, so you wanted to try your best to soothe her worries.

By the start of the wedding ceremony, you were standing in front of a fan to stop all the sweating. You were glad you had already mastered running around in heels with how much you did it that morning alone.

"Okay, we're starting soon," the wedding organizer reminded the party. "Get into positions, please."

You move in line with the other bridesmaids and take the arm of your partner, who you think is one of Freddie's college friends but never really took it upon yourself to get to know him better. He was quite nice, in your limited interactions.

Once the doors open and you start walking, you try and focus on the actual procession, but your eyes immediately start looking for Jamie. You try and be subtle with it, not even moving your head, and you manage to spot him on the left side. When he catches you looking, he gives you a quick wink and you have to hold back a smile as you reach the end of the aisle.

The wedding went smoothly, much to your relief. You had spent most of the vows portion trying not to cry or not to protest when Liv stated that Freddie was her best friend. But it was a beautiful ceremony, so it was worth it.

You were now at the reception and after a quick scare with one of the entrees, you were now relaxing at your table next to Jamie, who had not let go of your left hand since you found him. He had been caressing your fingers and weirdly, it was soothing you.

Because of it, it was easy for him to invite you to dance. Neither of you were much dancers as kids — you discovered as much when you went to most of your school dances together, — but Jamie seemed to have improved enough that he could lead you through the movements.

"Christ, maybe I should take you to some beginner dancing lessons together sometime." Jamie teased, and you faked offense. All he could do was laugh at your reaction before adding, "Learning proper footwork wouldn't hurt."

"You truly are a charmer, babe," You roll your eyes, but still allow him to pull you closer as you continue to slow dance.

As the song ended, you pulled away but kept your hands in his. You smile and he mirrors the expression, but there is something else in Jamie's eyes as he looks at you. You had already seen the look of love from him, but this was different like it was something stronger.

Without thinking, you immediately tell him, "I love you, Jamie." It didn't matter how many times you said it, Jamie still felt the giddy feeling in his chest when the words left your mouth. He'd never felt like that with anyone else, and he hoped it never went away.

"I love you too, (Y/N)," Jamie replied and now you were the one with the warm feeling in your heart. You look away from him for a second and realize that it's almost time for your surprise.

You turn back to him, "I gotta get on stage. I'll see you in a bit."  Jamie looks confused, but you wink at him and start heading towards the microphone.

"Hello everyone, I hope you're enjoying the night so far." You start, drawing everyone's attention to you. Christ, you can't believe you agreed to this, but it beat making a whole speech instead.

"For those who don't know me, I'm (Y/N), Liv's maid of honor! You may now be asking yourself why I'm standing in front of you today. Well, for some backstory, Liv and Freddie had been scrambling for a performance for their wedding a few weeks ago. They then just so happened to pull up some of my old videos from university and decided, hey, why not get a close friend to perform for free, then? So, I've decided to honor their wishes and perform the song that was playing the night they met, becoming the soundtrack to their relationship. This is 'Kiss Me,'"

You spent the entire performance making sure you didn't mess up and finally, luck was on your side. Liv and Freddie never looked happier to be in the middle of the dance floor, as if they were reliving the first time they saw each other. That was enough motivation to continue the show, making sure you hit every note.

After everyone claps for you, you make your way down the side of the stage, where Jamie had been waiting for you. Without another word, Jamie takes you in his arms and kisses you deeply. You're lucky you were in the corner of the room, otherwise you'd have to deal with everyone's whistles and 'oohs and aahs.'

"What was that for?" You say breathlessly after pulling away and Jamie just smirks.

"You've been singing it for the past three minutes. Didn't you want someone to kiss you?" He points out and you can't help but laugh.

"Yes, very much so." You affirm.

You two head back to your seats and for the first time, you can just sit back and enjoy the wedding, while also promising yourself that you won't be a bridesmaid again till you get married. 

"Okay, it's time for the bouquet toss!" Liv announces and the women at the wedding start crowding in the middle of the room. 

You sigh and look at Jamie, who simply smirks and nods toward the group. "Go on, love. You have to be one with the team, right?" You stick your tongue out at him, before getting up from your chair and standing at the back of the group. Lessens the chances of catching it.

But they're never zero. As Liv tosses it up, it seems like it was aimed towards you and before you knew it, the bouquet was in your hands. It takes a second to sink in before Liv starts squealing at the sight and you're brought back to your senses.

The girls start circling around you and you can hear some of the guys start teasing Jamie, who seemed unfazed by it all. Once the crowds disperse, you walk back over to your boyfriend with an amused look on your face.

"Well then, Jamie. Guess you have to start getting ready then." You tease, simply just to mess with your boyfriend. You laugh before he pulls you in and wraps an arm around you.

Little did you know, he's been ready all night. And truthfully, Jamie had been ready all his life. In the past, he never understood what people meant by marrying your best friend, but now he did. He understood it clearer than ever.

As the party starts to die down and people start to depart, you decide it's time to get some rest too. You walk over to Liv and Freddie to bid them goodbye and both newlyweds hug you tightly as a show of gratitude.

"Really, thank you so much," Liv repeats and you just smile at her. Your best friend looks right past you, but before you can follow her line of sight, she asks, "But before you go, could you get my purse in the dressing room?"

You agree, thinking nothing of it since you had seen Liv leave a bit earlier, but the moment you leave the reception hall, Liv and Freddie move closer to Jamie. "Is everything ready?" Liv asks and Jamie nods confidently.

Some of his teammates as well as Roy and Keeley had been working all day to decorate his house. Like he always was, Jamie was stubborn about how he wanted it to be designed, which is why so many of them had to come over and why he made them update him with pictures every hour.

But weirdly enough, the whole day, he's felt relatively calm. There were nerves, sure, but being with you was already enough to relax him. Jamie had no doubt in his mind that he wanted to marry you and was sure you wanted the same.

"Okay, make sure to keep your back straight when you kneel. It looks weird in the pictures when you're hunched over," Freddie reminded him and Jamie nodded in acknowledgment. 

There weren't going to be any pictures though, since Jamie knew you wanted it to be private. And frankly, with how much of his life was open to the public, he wanted something like this to be just for the two of you.

But of course, the carefree feeling didn't last long. As you were on the way home, the anxiety started to rise up in Jamie and he decided to keep one hand in yours to try and calm him down. You had started to notice him getting fidgety, so you started caressing his hand with your own like he did earlier.

"Hey, let's just stay at my place tonight. It's nearer to the venue and it's pretty late, anyway." Jamie had pointed out before you got in the car and you didn't see any reason to argue. 

You spent half your time there anyway and have been victim to Roy Kent waking you up at ungodly hours for Jamie's training, where many times you've stopped yourself from pulling Jamie closer to stay with you because you knew he'd give in and the knocking would never stop. You loved Jamie, but you loved your peaceful sleep more.

Maybe it was the stress of the day getting to you, but you truly didn't notice anything too out of the ordinary from Jamie. When you pulled up to his house and got out of the car, you still hadn't suspected anything. Jamie rushed ahead to the front door though, which you did find interesting considering he never cared how his house looked before.

As you reach the door, he comes back out carrying a blindfold and you're alarmed. "Jamie! We're still outside, oh my god!"

He stifles a laugh, "It's not that! Christ, when did you become so dirty? I just have a surprise for you. Come on," he slowly wraps it over your eyes and you keep a hand on him as he guides you through the house by your waist.

"Okay, one more step... and there," By the feeling of blades of grass making it into your heels, you know you're in the backyard though it feels a bit warmer than it should be in October.

Jamie finally takes the blindfold off and reveals his backyard, though it's decorated with candles all over and a string of fairy lights hanging above you. There are other strings too, and as you look closer, it's photos of the two of you with some writing from Jamie in the corner of them. He gives you time to look around and you pick out some of the pictures. 

One was from the first football match of his that you ever attended, with your mismatched gloves and hot chocolate. We had such small hands then.

I knew I loved you in the dairy aisle of the grocery, was written in the corner of a photo Jamie took of you after your failed first date when you two were 15. You had wiped off your make-up but were still in your dress as you sat in the cart.

Annoying bloke, but thank Dani for taking this photo. A more recent one from when you first agreed to be Jamie's girlfriend on the way home from the Man City game. Despite the celebrations, you happened to fall asleep, so the photo has you sleeping and resting your head on Jamie's shoulder with your boyfriend scowling at the camera and cradling your head.

Did you see this coming, love? The photo was taken recently you suspect because it's you with your back to the camera while seated on the couch and Jamie showing off the ring box and sticking his tongue out.

You turn back at Jamie, who looks incredibly pleased with himself but even then, you can still detect the small traces of nerves on his face. You run back to him and plant your lips on his, and he happily reciprocates the kiss.

He pulls back and steadies you, before starting, "Look, you've always been so much smarter than me, so I'm sure you know where this is leading. But please, let me have my big speech, yeah?" You laugh but nod and allow him to go ahead.

"I love you. I'll never get tired of telling you. I never told you how much I wanted to be your friend when you first moved in next door. I thought, this girl seemed so smart and pretty, and she would be a good person to play football with. I was right, but you were so much more, too. You were what anchored me in the world, one of the only people that I was never afraid to be myself with. In the best and worst moments, you were always the first person I wanted to be with."

"Looking back on those memories made me realize there wasn't just a moment where I fell for you because I just always have. You owned my heart before either of us knew it. Even in the hard times when we struggled, when I became a different man and broke your heart, you were still the one in mine. And for all that I put you through, I don't think a million sorry's will ever be enough. But you forgave me anyway and now, I have a chance to spend the rest of my life with you."

"I love you wholeheartedly. I know it's only been a few months, but I can't imagine my life anymore without you. Everyone knew it since we were kids, but the moment I saw you in Nelson Road again, I knew it too. It was always going to be us, (Y/N)."

Jamie lets go of your hands and gets something from his jacket pocket. He kneels down and shows you the ring box. "Now, before I open this, I picked out two rings. You get to pick which one you'll wear, okay?"

You're surprised at this, but you decide to nod anyway. Jamie reveals the first ring, which was inside the box, and it's the first plastic ring he gave all those years ago. You burst out laughing and simply can't believe what he'd done. Only Jamie would pull something like this while proposing.

"So, what do you think?" He pulls it out of its position and holds it up to you.

"I think... this one might be a bit too small for me, Jamie." You point out and Jamie fakes disappointment, before tucking it in his pocket.

"Well then, good thing I'm always prepared." He then pulls out the actual ring. A silver one, with small petals engraved as if to replicate a plant, with the bud of the flower being substituted with the diamond in the middle. It was a small but beautiful cut, and you were always one for the simpler things. It was the perfect ring.

The sound of your full name moves your attention back to Jamie as he prepares himself to say the words he's been practicing in the mirror for the past three months, to you now. "Will you marry me?"

You kneel down in front of him to look him straight in the eye. You cradle his face with your hands before saying, "Jamie Tartt, you are the biggest dork in this world for this. And yes, I will marry you."

Jamie lets out a sigh of relief and smiles, before slipping the ring onto your finger. He immediately kisses you after, cradling your face this time. You two get up again without separating before Jamie separates just to carry you in his arms, bridal style.

He kisses you once again, and says, "I knew I was irresistible to you."

You laugh and roll your eyes, "You were the one on your knees for me."

You lean in to kiss him this time, and after, Jamie rushes back inside the house for you two to celebrate the start of the rest of your life together.

TAGLIST: @moonflowersandsparkles @faith-alons26 @rexorangecouny @aiyaiy @thegirlthatwantedtowrite @giggling-sewer-ginger @katdahlali @higherthanheroes @guccilongboard @alipap3 @rockchicrebel @ellietartt @shineforever19 @skewedcherries @jamietarttdodo @meg-ro @deepdarkvelvet @taytaylala12 @loveforaugust @crownofdecitreadingrespectfully @dickgraysonspersonalwhore @jess4rush @scaramou @rae4725 @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo (couldn't tag you for some reason?)

[respectthepetty]

The Loyal Pin - Episode 9

I love that this episode started with one color-coded brother being so happy after a night of partying.

And the other one losing his color because he is internally freaking out trying to convince himself that Anin basically had sex with her best friend on the lawn for everyone and God to see because she was drunk. Keep telling yourself that lie, dear brother. I used that excuse in college too. Alcohol just makes people gay . . . er. Sure, Jan.

But we all know Anin is sexing up her girlfriend, SOBER, so now it's time for a color-coded beach trip, so TV can lie to us again that sex in the sand is romantic and not torturous. However, the skin is awfully soft after rolling around it in for a bit, so I guess beach sex has its perks beyond, you know, it being sex.

But the heteros do not understand the queer agenda and immediately start wrecking Pink Person Pin and Blue Beauty Anin's beach sex plans.

However, Ueangfah is color-coded yellow, and Pranot is in shorts, so even though it's looking bad for the lesbians, the bisexuals are thriving, and the bisexuals are ME!

Shesus Christ! Nevermind, nobody is doing well now that Kuea has shown up IN BLUE! This is actually why I stopped writing this recap because I was livid when I saw this mediocre man wearing Anin's color. The audacity of a cis hetero man will never stop amazing me. It's cool that he picked up that Pin likes her love interest in blue but he missed one important factor in that equation. HE NEEDS TO BE A GIRL! All that money, yet he can't buy a damn clue.

Yet the girls are still trying to Live, Laugh, and Love under these terrible color-coded conditions!

But Aon is playing these color-coded games too in order to get Anin's attention and wearing versions of pink and purple throughout the trip. Basically the love rivals are waging a strategic color-coded war, and if I wasn't so pissed off at them, I'd be really proud of the wardrobe department for acing this assignment and earning its paycheck.

But I AM pissed because these rivals are doing the most to get in between the ladies and make color-coded fetch happen when IT'S NEVER GONNA HAPPEN, GRETCHEN!

One of them even decides to go as far as DROWNING to get attention! This is like the extreme version of "instigating a fight so his hands can be on you" but because we are dealing with lesbians it's "drowning in the beach trip so her lips can be on you." And I know she didn't do it on purpose, but the structural sexism in this scene with all the men refusing to give her CPR because it wasn't proper is why feminism is for EVERYONE! There is nothing inherently sexual about lips touching lips, yet even when SAVING A LIFE, everyone made that shit sexual (INCLUDING PIN!) and I'm looking at a show set in the 50s (60s?) and feeling like it's about 2024, so now I'm pissed about it.

And this is how I know Aon is not showing her true colors because unlike everyone else who has a consistent color, she is flip flopping like those fish she almost drowned with in the water.

But it doesn't matter because now that Aon is out of commission, the girls can get a moment together to try to make beach sex happen. Spoiler: It doesn't happen because Pia is not about that "Be Gay, Do Crime" life (fun fact: public sex on a beach is illegal in most places, like Thailand).

Which means the beach sex is on hold AGAIN because the color-coded brothers must make sure they throw a party (which Pranot does not plan and it's probably why everyone hates it!), and it also means that the love rivals are at it again with the color-coded shenanigans starting with Aon, in purple.

And now Kuea enters in blue.

But my sunshine Ueangfah is looking hella fine and doing her best to bring a smile to Anin's face who is pressed that Pink Person Pin is dancing with Kuea even though it was her own color-coded brother WHO IS A PRINCE that keeps forcing Pin to do this little song-and-dance, literally. I'm gonna grab my girl Ueangfah and head out because she deserves better and by 'better,' I mean me.

Pranot is judging this entire shitshow safely from his seat because 1) he did not plan any of this so this is not his shitshow, and 2) unlike these other men, he knows better than to get in the way of lesbians and beach sex, so he makes sure to keep his ass seated and not ask none of them to dance instead opting to down this awful wine that he knows damn well does not pair well with the food. He is a king among peasants.

But because of the hard work of Prik and Pia, the real VIPs here, the color-coded girls in love finally get beach sex!

AND A PROPOSAL! A sand version of the pink sasa bunny that Anin gave Pin with A 💗 P on it holds the ring that will forever tie Anin to Pin's heart (and will cause them a lot of problems, but those are tomorrow's problem, not today's).

The girls' skin is soft (from beach sex). They are glowing (from beach sex). And they are practically engaged! All is well and they can now live happily ever after.

That is until this Blue Bastard pops back up.

He instantly clocks the ring on Pin's finger and instead of minding his own business, he apparently will make it everyone's problem because the man is determined to marry a lesbian who doesn't love him nor want him, and I am once again standing in front of y'all screaming that feminism benefits everyone including men who think they need a wife to be complete.

Pia and Prik pick up what I'm dropping off, and are backing up their girl in this battle for Pin's hand as they wear blue . . . and orange . . .

And this is where some of y'all really lost your minds because Anin wore yellow thinking it might have been connected to my babygirl Ueangfah, but have no fear because I offered a Wild Ass Theory way back in the second episode.

As the color-coded girls in love age and inherit more adult responsibilities, I think they will incorporate another color.

And those colors are the ones that belong to their mothers.

The girls have been living in a nice little bubble in Pine Palace, but Anin is a princess and Pin is not, so the expectations for their positions in life are coming at them quicker than they want to believe. Pin's mom has mentioned several times that both girls must marry, and Anin's brothers have made similar comments, so even though the girls are growing closer, I think harsh reality is already sneaking into their plans and the colors might be telling us that.

So I think the girls need to be careful or they will turn into the mothers, and because I think Pin's mom is a lesbian who vowed to be the perfect woman rather than love someone else after status tore her and her girlfriend apart, the truth might be closer than I realize, and her color-coded story is similar to the girls in more way than one.

But the colors could all be meaningless, and I could just be crazy. Who knows, you know?