#when I wasn't even rooting for them in the first half of the show

[dropthedemiurge]

It's funny how it already happened several times to me -

I love complicated and thoughtful shows. I love subtext and deep meaning and hidden details. I really struggle with silly comedy in BLs unless they do it thoughtfully and balance it well with meaning (bless you, shows like Be my Favorite)

I have nothing against silly romcoms but maybe I don't need them right now. I can't even watch We Are Series because I suffered in first episode :(

And yet! And yet sometimes I watch a show that I know technically isn't great or even if cinematography is bad but that show fills me with a lot of warmth and joy. Somehow I absolutely enjoy stumbling upon those weird anomalies. Somehow I lower my expectations based on how they present themselves and I enjoy the heck out of them till the end.

That's what happened to me with Twins the Series and now Boys Be Brave lol

And then I come on Tumblr, and everyone is trashing them xD

I guess I should not be surprised but I think genuinely I just see the potential and I'm content with having the rest of it in my head if the story at least shows where they were going with them and what they wanted to say. Instead, I'm filled with absolutely rage in the finale when the show poses itself like being meaningful and groundbreaking and then completely ruins their own messages and characters (looking at you, Only Friends)

This post doesn't mean anything, I'm just really curious why I don't particularly enjoy averagely-made stories but every once in a while I get truly happy watching one.

(putting this out of my tags - i had a funky thought about the dissonance, jinwoo x kiseob are living in a romcom world, meanwhile inho x balgeum live in a grey shelter world. No wonder we got the similar ending for them, right? Does anyone know what I mean?)

[xanasaurusrex]

comforting clarisse after breaking her spear

clarisse la rue x reader (any godly parent) a/n: i promise this was supposed to be a drabble but i got carried away (:

clarisse was stomping through the camp after capture the flag. everyone was practically jumping out of her way, no one wanting to face her very clear wrath.

by now, everyone knew what had happened right before the blue team won capture the flag. percy, the new kid, and clarisse had been in a pretty heated fight. the ares kids that usually followed clarisse around had backed off, realizing that the fight was a little bit more heated than they anticipated.

percy and clarisse both had a hold on the spear, and when clarisse threw him over her shoulder, the spear had snapped in two.

nobody had seen clarisse this angry in a really long time.

clarisse knew that she hadn't been this angry in a long time. honestly, she couldn't remember the last time she had wanted to rip the world apart half as much as she did right now.

clarisse had spent enough time being forced into therapy by her mother to know that being this angry wasn't good. she was determined, even in her rage-induced haze, to not approach percy jackson right now, because she would only make things worse. yes, she hated the kid more than anything right now, and yes, if the opportunity arose, she would twist his arms right off his body, but again, that would only make things worse.

there was only one person right now who clarisse knew could calm her down enough so that she wouldn't go on a killing spree.

y/n.

clarisse didn't know exactly where she was, but she had a pretty good idea. if y/n wasn't there already, she would be soon.

clarisse completely bypassed all of the cabins and headed straight for the woods. a few people looked at her in curiosity, but a quick sneer from clarisse got them to mind their own business.

the second clarisse had passed the initial wall of trees into the woods, she took a second to take a deep breath of the pine-scented air. just taking a break from practically stomping through the camp, she felt a lot of the tension in her body relaxed. she was here, she was away from the prying eyes and nosiness of the other campers, and most importantly, she was away from percy jackson.

that was a big step in the right direction.

she looked up and to her right, and caught sight of the first tree. it had a circle carved into it. she walked past it, and a few feet later saw another tree with a circle carved into it.

she followed the trail of circle-carved trees into a clearing that she'd found during her first summer here at camp.

originally, clarisse never planned on sharing this area with anyone. it was only hers. it was her safe place from the world, from all the stresses and anxieties that plagued her day and night, an escape from camp.

the clearing was mostly used as her calm down spot, where she came when she was so angry all she could see was red.

like right now.

but then she met y/n, and at the end of their first summer together, clarisse took her here, and showed it to her. and so now, whenever they needed to, they met up here. to just... be for a few hours.

together.

when clarisse finally pushed past the tall grass that was closing off the clearing, and she stepped foot on the grass that clarisse cut every once in a while, she finally caught sight of y/n.

just seeing her made everything feel as if it was going to be okay.

clarisse felt her muscles relax completely, and all the angry thoughts were quieted as thoughts of her girlfriend climbed into her mind, took root there, and made themselves comfortable.

clarisse was okay with that, because thinking about y/n was much more pleasant than thinking about that punk percy jackson.

clarisse stood there for a few more seconds, admiring y/n. the way the sun shone on her hair. the rings that glittered on her finger, every single one of them gifted to her by clarisse. seeing y/n wear them always made her happy, made her feel like she could climb a mountain and barely break a sweat.

she was sure that she had never loved anyone as much as she loved y/n.

it was at that moment that y/n turned around. at first, there was a slight look of alarm on her face, but it calmed as soon as she realized it was clarisse.

"clarisse," y/n murmured, and just that one utterance of her name felt like a siren's song for clarisse, immediately drawing her to her.

y/n was sitting on one of the large boulders in the clearing, a thin blanket already spread out over the surface of it so she could safely sit on the rock without burning her legs.

y/n stood up, and walked towards clarisse. clarisse took a step closer to her, and then they were right in front of each other, faces just a few inches apart.

"hi," clarisse muttered.

"hi," y/n smiled.

the two looked at each other for a few more seconds, before y/n opened her arms, and clarisse immediately fell into them. clarisse's face buried itself in y/n's neck, and y/n didn't hesitate to start stroking clarisse's hair in the way that she knew she loved. the way her mother had always done when she would get overwhelmed as a kid.

clarisse let out a heavy breath, one that y/n suspected she had been holding for quite some time.

"do you wanna talk about it?" y/n asked quietly.

clarisse shook her head harshly, and then hugged her arms tighter around y/n's waist. "not yet."

"okay." y/n responded.

the two stood there hugging for a few minutes, clarisse's tight hold on y/n never wavering. clarisse's breathing was labored and heavy, and y/n knew it was because she was holding back tears.

clarisse was the kind of person who didn't like to cry. even though y/n knew that there were probably tears glistening in her eyes, clarisse was going to refuse to let them fall, because clarisse was determined to be as tough as possible.

y/n couldn't even begin to imagine the pain clarisse was feeling right now. her spear, the one gift clarisse had from her father, was now snapped in half and unusable. that spear had been clarisse's prized possession, the thing she regarded with utmost love and care, and never allowed anybody but her touch.

there had been one time that clarisse had allowed y/n to hold it for a few minutes, but even then clarisse was anxious at the idea of not being in complete control of it, even for a small amount of time.

y/n had heard clarisse's scream as her and the rest of red team chased after luke with the flag. she had been so close, ever so close, and had run even faster when she heard the scream clarisse let out.

when she stumbled onto the beach and saw the snapped spear, she immediately knew what happened.

y/n didn't stay to find out what happened after that, she just saw the way clarisse stomped off in anger, and she immediately rushed away to get to the clearing, knowing that clarisse would need to be calmed down.

and now the two of you were here, standing in the middle of your clearing, holding each other.

finally, after a long time of just standing there in an embrace, clarisse whispers, "that was the only thing i ever got from my dad,"

y/n pulled away to look at clarisse, and felt the small patch of wetness that clarisse had left behind on her shoulder. "i know, honey," she whispered. she took hold of clarisse's hand and pulled her towards the boulder that she had been sitting on previously.

once the two were sitting, y/n directed clarisse to lay her head in her lap. she began stroking her hair again, and occasionally stroking her cheek.

"i'm so sorry this happened," y/n whispered in clarisse's ear. "i love you,"

"i love you too," clarisse whispered back.

clarisse closed her eyes, wanting to block out the visuals of the world, and focus only on the way y/n's hand felt when it was stroking her hair and her cheek, and the comfort she felt whenever she was in y/n's presence.

she loved this. she loved that she had a person who she knew she was safe with, safe to tell anything to.

clarisse was sure that she had never loved anyone as much as she loved y/n.

[servicpop]

AUGH THE COWBOY FIC WAS SO FUCKING CUTE FHSHJSBUSKFDSKUS I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!!!!! OUUUUUU

I ALREADY HAVE ANOTHER IDEA FOR THEM!!!! so the reader eventually has to get to the next town for a week or two for a series of shows, reader tells Cole where he’ll be and where he’ll preform so Cole can send him a letter if he’d like. Cole obviously send a him letters and reader writes back every time. But one day Cole doesn’t send reader a response and this makes him think Cole lost interest for some reason, so readers moping around and complaining about it to other show girls until Cole shows up at the place their preforming. Reader spots Cole in the crowd and gets excited immediately and the rest of the show he has a wide smile up until he can go out and talk to Cole who has flowers for the reader!!!

THIS CAN END FLUFFY OR SMUTTY OR BOTH IDC I JUST LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCH YOU DONT GET IT IM CRAZY RAH :3

-🎱

✶ ﹑ㅤletters & flowersㅤ﹏

NOW STARRING : Cole the cowboy x 'showgirl' m!reader

「ㅤSFW & NSFWㅤ」ㅤhalf is sfw and half is nsfw (the nsfw part will be separated and labelled as nsfw!)

✙ NSFW warnings — sub!top cole, dom!bottom/power bottom reader, cole is a virgin, riding, tummy bulge, cole is more vocal than reader, first time

notes ,, go to part one if you haven't read it already! Not proofread !!

You were able to extend your stay at Pinecrest just for a little while, and during your time here you were able to meet so many people and learn so many things about agriculture, farming, taking care of animals, and you even got to meet the local dog, Scout. More importantly, you were able to spend more time with Cole. He took you out almost every night to go sightseeing, taking you to his favourite spots whether it was in the mountains or by the lake. He even taught you how to ride your own horse and named her Taffy after you; since you were so sweet.

Nothing could've replaced those star-filled nights where it was just you and Cole with your horses, Taffy and Spirit, enjoying the cool breeze and endless conversations that seemed to meander. However, you were a busy man, especially while being in the entertainment industry you didn't have time to stick around forever. You could feel your heart sink just a little bit when your manager had announced that another show would be held in the next town for a few weeks. Of course you enjoyed your line of work, you loved performing, loved being on stage and hearing the cheers of others, but you also loved Cole's company. You knew that Cole had a role here at Pinecrest and it would've been selfish of you to ask him to come with you. But, it wasn't like you were going to keep this whole ordeal a secret from him.

"Cole?" Your voice seemed to break the silence; his head turned to look at you, "Yeah?" Cole's voice was warm, and gentle with a hint of ruggedness like honey dripping over gravel, and the way his eyes glittered when they met yours was enough to make your legs weak under the eye contact, causing you to splutter when you decided to speak again. "I– I have to leave tomorrow, I got another show I need to do at the next town," You mumble, shying away from his entrancing gaze. The cogs in his rusty little brain were visibly turning as Cole stared at you blankly with his lips parted like he was trying to comprehend your words. You can tell it finally settled in his mind when his face deflated like a sad puppy, "You're leavin' sugar?" His voice wavers as he stared at you; the fingers that were once tracing the rim of his glass paused, and the bartender took this moment of Cole's sad expression as a cue to refill his cup with root beer.

Oh, you couldn't do this to him. It was almost like kicking an abandoned puppy on the side of the road — totally cruel. You proposed the idea of sending letters and his sad puppy expression lifted just a little. Fishing in your bag you pulled out a flyer of your next show, sliding it across the counter so he could keep a copy for himself, "Here, send them to this address," you tapped the words in bold that say where you were performing. Cole — of course — takes the flyer eagerly, scanning over it to mentally note down the information written on it, "I'll definitely be sendin' you letters honey," Cole smiled with his dimples peeking through. He picked up his glass of beer and placed it between his lips to take a swig before he started blabbering about whatever came to his mind, a common habit of Cole, and you were always keen to listen to his rambles. You could listen to his voice all night long.

Unfortunately, Cole's most dreaded day came when you had to leave for the next town. He most definitely was one of the first people to wake up at the crack of dawn to catch you before you left, pressing a light, lingering kiss on the back of your palm as if you were a prince and he was nothing but a humble knight. After the townspeople waved you off, you and your fellow performers left via the vans. It was approximately a four hour ride, it would've been quicker if you took the train but your manager insisted to go by car for the scenery. You felt yourself missing Cole more than ever, more than anyone else that you've met and being in multiple towns and countries, you've met alot of people.

Your show was held over four days with a one day break in between and a few free days to explore the area — a total of one week and 3 days. As promised, after settling down in the new town, you received letters every morning from Cole. They usually contained heartfelt messages about his day, his animals, what he ate for every meal, some local gossip, and of course expressing how much he missed you. He even signed every letter with small doodles of what you assumed to be him and Scout. Sometimes, he'd even attach small poloroids of himself usually with Taffy and Spirit in the back. Every night when you had time to spare you scavenged your hotel room for a spare piece of paper and a pen, writing back a response with your signature and some doodles that were definitely not as good as Cole's. It's corny, but you kissed the envelop after sealing it before sending it off back to him.

One day after your 2nd show, you stopped receiving letters, and it really messed up your mood. Did Cole lose interest? Had he found someone better than you? Was it because you were away? All these thoughts ran through your mind and you found yourself slumped at the vanity, complaining and whining to the other showgirls on how you felt like he didn't like you anymore. Knowing how supportive the girls are, they always attempted to comfort you, patting your back and reassuring you that he might’ve just not had any time to write back, that he was busy tending the cattle and whatnot. But no matter what they said, that feeling if a pit in your stomach lingered for the 3rd show. Your aura wasn't the same, your energy wasn't the same, you couldn't perform as well as you did the first two shows.

But suddenly, you felt a strange, familiar pair of eyes staring at you from the crowd. Mid dance, your eyes scanned the sea of people and caught on that dear smile that seemed to light up even the darkest of nights. Cole. That stupidly charming cowboy was nestled in between the bodies of others looking at you. Just you with those eyes filled with admiration. Your heart skipped a beat — or multiple — and you felt your lips involuntarily curl up into a smile.

"That's it. That's the smile I love."

With a new-found burst of energy, your limbs no longer felt sluggish and that fake smile was replaced with a genuine one. All of the sudden, the spotlight seemed to focus on you, highlighting the sequins that glittered on your costume and your bright smile. The other showgirls seemed to notice your change in mood and they all shot you small smiles, watching at how your hips swayed with the beat of the music and how your dance lightened up the atmosphere. You couldn't wait to see him.

Once the performance ended and you and the other performers bowed, you immediately ran out into the crowd, searching frantically for Cole but no matter how hard you looked and pushed through the people, you couldn't find Cole. Your feet picked up in speed as you ran outside, looking around to find Cole leaning against a streetlight with a bouquet in his hands. "Hey," You huffed, catching your breath from all that running around. "You were— amazing, sweetheart," Cole smiled, extending his arm out for you to take the bouquet of dasies, "U–uhm, the daises are hand picked if— if you were wonderin'." From the way he was stuttering over his words like a highschool boy confessing to his crush, and how his eyes focused on anything but your face, you could tell he's never given flowers to anyone in such a romantic way. They were beautiful, all thoughtfully placed together to make the bouquet aesthetically pleasing with a white ribbon tied around the stems with a small bow. You took the bouquet before wrapping your arms around Cole in a warm embrace. He didn't expect you to hug him so abruptly but he for sure did not complain, taking only a second to return the hug, wrapping his arms around you protectively. "I've never seen you smile so wide before darlin,' were you excited to see me?" Cole chuckled, keeping your face pressed against his cheek as he tangled his fingers through your hair. A small laugh escaped your lips too as you teased back, "Don't get ahead of yourself now."

After catching up a bit on the way back to your hotel, you found out through Cole that one of his cows gave birth to an adorable baby he named 'Choco' from its brown coloured fur. He really did have a quirk in naming animals. Once back, he helped you find a vase for your daisies, filling it up with water before carefully plopping your flowers in them. You flopped onto the bed, bouncing slightly from how plush the mattress was, and Cole followed shortly, laying right beside you. As you laid on the bed with your eyes staring up at the white ceiling, you felt a hand tangle with yours, turning your head to meet Cole's grin and his hands holding yours tightly. "Thanks for coming tonight," You were more than happy that he actually took the time out of his day to come all the way here to watch you perform again, "You know I'd do anythin' for you sugar," He cooed, squishing your cheeks between his fingers before he brought your face to his, giving you a small peck on the lips. You always loved how soft and gentle Cole's lips felt agaisnt yours, and they always had a faint taste of strawberries on them.

"That's too corny,"

"You want corn? We can go to the corn fields sometime if that's what you want"

And that earnt a pillow straight to his face.

One kiss turned into two, maybe three, with you leaning over Cole's body while he was still laying down. His arm snaked over to hook around your waist, pulling you closer to him and tangling his legs with yours. As he presses his body agaisnt yours, you felt him poke at your thigh. He was excited, something that you didn't expect from sweet little Cole. He seemed to notice and it was evident through the blush that creeped up his neck, "S–sorry... it's instinct y'know?" His words stumble over eachother and he brings a hand to his face, hiding behind the comfort of his palms as embarrassment ate away at him. It was adorable! This guy being such a flustered mess just from a few kisses and you haven't even done anything that intimate yet.

You reassure him, obviously; you tell him that it's natural and that it's okay to react this way. But then it strikes you. He seemed so inexperienced, so shy about everything. Was Cole a virgin? "I've never done anythin' like this before... I've never felt this way about someone else," His usually loud and confident voice was now reduced to a soft, nervous whisper. He shuffled slightly, pulling you up and onto his lap, his eyes glittered with nervousness and excitement, "D'you think you could show me a thing or two?" Damn. The way he's looking at you with pure love and sincerity made your blood pump faster from how quick your heart was beating. You've been dying for this too, so why not?

You helped him undress before following shortly after, discarding your clothes somewhere in the hotel. He was surprisingly big— like really big. His pretty pink tip was already glistening with pre-cum from the previous kisses and he had a prominent vein that ran down the underside of his cock that was bound to be a sensitive spot for him. Cole was also more built than you expected, he had toned muscles that were most defined in his arms and he had pretty big pecs. They were like pillows, you'd have to convince him to let you sleep on them later. Cole refused to look you in the eyes while you rummaged the beside drawers for lube. You put a generous amount on your palm before placing the bottle down and turning to face Cole, who was trembling like a little mouse.

"Relax," you cooed, wrapping your lubed up hand around his shaft, pumping slowly to coat him. His body physically jerked once he felt the cool substance around his cock, and a low whine slipped from his lips. Cole's breathing became more heavy as you slowly stroked his length, his eyes fluttered with every movement. Once you deemed that to be enough, you slowly moved to hover over his lap and Cole's hands immediately went up to grip your hips for stability. You knew this would hurt; you weren't properly prepared but you didn't care that much. Slowly, you sunk down on Cole's cock, feeling the slight burn as you bit back small whimpers. "You okay sugar? 'Mnot hurtin' you am I?" Cole grunted, his fingers gripping your hips even more, guiding you down his length. He was concerned, yes, but he also couldn't help from twitching inside you.

"I'm fine," you replied with a small huff once you were able to take Cole in fully, relaxing a bit so you could get used to his size. Cole on the other hand was certainly not relaxing. You could almost see the muscles on his arm tense and he had this unfamiliar look in his eyes like he was desperate for something, any sort of movement from you. After awhile of just silence and stillness, Cole's resolve finally caved in, "Oh, please sweetheart, please move. Anythin'! I need to feel you, please," he whined like a little puppy, staring into your eyes as if he was going to die if you didn't give him any sort of relief. But that wasn't any fun now was it?

You leaned down, your hips rolling slightly in accord to your movements, and pressed a honeyed kiss on the outer corner of Cole's lips. That little movement with your hips almost made Cole cum on the spot. "You can't do that t'me," Cole's eyes gleamed over with tears, dampening his eyelashes. All wet and pretty. He swore he'd actually start crying if you didn't move. "Alright, alright, sorry," you apologised but didn't really mean it — he was so adorable begging you just to move. But, you weren't that cruel. A string of 'thank you's poured out of Cole's mouth as you rocked your hips rhymically, grinding down on his cock. His head tilted back against the silk pillows, his brown hair cascading across the pillowcase like flowing water. Cole's lips were slightly parted, and his chest rose and fell intermittently, some breaths short and stuttered, while others were deeper.

"It feels so good," Cole muttered out between pants. His voice was nothing short of a whiny mess mixed with a few moans and grunts. You lifted yourself off of him, almost lifting completely off of him before dropping your hips back down, earning a muffled whimper from you and a loud moan from Cole. He was undoubtedly alot more vocal in expressing his pleasure. His eyes opened with heavy eyelids, as he looked up at you; you could practically see the hearts in his eyes. Cole's gaze flickered down to your tummy and his mind went blank when he saw the small bulge in your stomach, "Oh mercy," he breathed out, his hand moved to touch your stomach, "You're gonna be the death of me if you keep— hah, keep teasin' me like this."

Your mind was just as lost as Cole's with the way his dick was able to reach your prostate so easily. It drove you crazy; his cock angled perfectly to hit it over and over again with each bounce. Your own neglected cock was sliding along Cole's happy trail, the warmth of his body made you twitch everytime you grinded your hips. "I'm— im close, so so so close, please— please let me cum." Beads of sweat rolled down Cole's temples and his forearms flexed, digging his fingertips into your hips hard enough to leave an indent — he was careful not to use his nails, Cole would never want to hurt you. "Im—" Cole sat up from his laying position, enveloping you in his arms and buried his face in the crook of your neck, needing something to hold onto while he orgasmed. His moans were muffled by your neck as his thigh spasmed faintly while he spilt his seed inside of you, filling you up to the brim. Your own orgasm followed after his, coating his abs with your fluid.

You two sat in the comfort of eachothers arms and the sound of your heavy breathing; your own arms were lazily draped over his shoulders with one hand stroking his hair. "When's your next show?" Cole asked, moving his head off your shoulder to look at you, "The day after tomorrow, but I have rehearsal tomorrow morning," a small pout spreads across Cole's lips as his eyes flicker to loon at your thigh instead. "Do you think you can walk properly tomorrow?" "Oh right..."

Bonus ♡

You winced as you settled down into the chair infront of the vanity. A few of the showgirls walked up to you, noticing that something was off, "You okay honey bun? You seem to be in alot of pain today," one of the girls ask, placing a comforting hand on your back. "He obviously got some action last night with that cowboy guy." "No I did not!" "It's obvious in the way you're limping sweetie."

Cole on the other hand, was still soundly asleep in your hotel bed, curled up with the blanket he stole from you during the night.

a/n ,, Cole oh sweet Cole . To be honest ,, I'm still not used to writing smut . I guess it's because I'm trying my hardest not to make it sound off or weird ,, maybe I'm just immature . The word cock sounds funny to me . Anyways !! I kinda rushed the smut . To be fair my main focus with Cole is how he's an innocent n' sweet guy but ya know ,, nsfw is what gets people going these days

[skam-in-every-language]

Randomly watched My Life With The Walter Boys and I'll say this...

Alex in the first half was so endearing. His anxiety, his mannerisms and literally everything about the way he acted and spoke made him extremely likeable and just someone you were absolutely rooting for. And you could tell they wanted us to root for him.

Then in the second half it was like they were actively attempting to assassinate his character, to the point that even within the show itself Jackie was calling out his OOC behavior. But this was an obvious attempt to make Cole seem less problematic and the better choice for Jackie. What the show failed to realize however is that the thing that made Cole almost redeemable was finding out he wasn't the asshole that hooked up with his brothers girlfriend on purpose, so to have him turn into the asshole that hooks up with his brothers girlfriend on purpose is crazy to me. I mean this dude spent the entire season on his soap box claiming to be crucified for something he "would never do" to his brother and then in the end did it anyway knowing how much that affected Alex the first time.

I'm sorry but I cannot root for them. It's disgusting what Cole and Jackie did to Alex. And as much as they tried to make it seem like Alex was being insecure, clingy and generally overbearing in the relationship he had his reasons and to be fair they were completely understandable. Alex 100% did not deserve that from either of them. This will crush him and his relationship with his brother is now probably ruined beyond repair. I'm on Alex's side on this one. He can do so much better than a girl who would kiss his brother right after he tells her he loves her.

Cole and Jackie deserve each other. He's a mess and so is she. They'll be great together until they're not and when it's over he would have ruined his relationship with his brother and she will be licking her wounds wishing she had chosen the guy who treated her kindly from the beginning.

[flowerandblood]

The Fall from the Heavens (8)

[ canon • Aemond x Strong • niece female ]

[ warnings: sex content, smut, angst, violence, swearing, humiliation, chauvinism, suicide attempt, descriptions of wounding, coercion ]

[ description: A cool distance turns into friendship and more when two children see that they can find refuge and understanding in each other. However, naïve dreams collide with the reality in which every event has consequences and what once could have been love becomes a dark, newly painful obsession. Angst, sexual tension, obsession, violence, madness, very dark Aemond. ]

The story in this series is an alternate reality from the oneshot Stay and love, leave and die, in which Aemond reads the letters his niece has sent to him over the years. They are the same characters and it shows what would have happened between them − I have changed the background story from their childhood slightly for the sake of the plot.

Characters & Series Moodboard Lady Strong Moodboard Aemond & Lady Strong Moodboard Aemond & Lady Strong Childhood

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Next chapters: Masterlist

_____

That night she awoke in her uncle's embrace; the bed they were lying on was cramped, forcing them to lie with their legs and arms intertwined. When she fell asleep for the first time her uncle stood up and covered them with some blankets, immediately pulling her close again.

She felt with her rapidly beating heart that he was bare.

She let his fingers completely slide her nightgown off her, his such shameless closeness, the heat of his skin was shocking to her and took her breath away.

"− sleep −" She heard him whisper softly in a low murmur, his hand combed through her hair, his half-hard manhood throbbed hard against his words and hit her stomach.

Despite what he had done, the fact that she was sure she would not be able to sit up the next day, she let him take her a second time that night.

Their lips, innocently at first, sank into each other, the tips of their tongues began to lick again, and after a moment his hand lifted her thigh, throwing it around his waist, the thick head of his cock pushing into her again from below.

This time it was she who slid her fingers down to her slit, opening it for him to help him − they moaned into each other's mouths, drunk and sleepy as the thrust of his hips slid his manhood deep inside her.

"− fuck, little one − I'm not sure I'll be able to stop −" He muttered, immediately beginning to root into her, with sure, deep pushes sinking into her again and again, her oversensitive, sore muscles clenching even tighter against him, whimpers on the edge of pleasure and pain escaping her lips.

She wasn't sure what he meant, but she knew that they were doing something from which there was no turning back.

"− I know − just a little longer − your uncle is close −" He breathed out, speeding up his pace, no longer paying attention to the helpless sounds that rushed out of his throat with each of his thrusts, the bed beneath them creaked softly. His one hand clenched on her buttocks, the other on her hair as their eyes closed, her nose pressed against his cheek, her breasts cuddled into his bare chest.

"− so good −" He hummed, rooting into her harder as she mewled at his words, her walls squeezing against him in involuntary reflex, sucking his fat erection inside.

"− Aemond −" She moaned, horrified at how her body reacted to him, how hot she felt, feeling their mingled moisture run down her thigh onto the sheets beneath them, their bare bodies slapping against each other with a loud clicks.

"− fuck − fuck − fuck − fuck − mghmm −" He gasped; she heard his low, surprised groan of relief and pleasure, before once again that night his warm seed spilled deep inside her.

There was something obscene and terrifying about how close they were, that they were one in the proper sense of the word, one body, one quivering flesh.

She could feel his thick, swollen cock pulsing inside her for a moment longer as his mouth placed wet, messy kisses on her forehead, cheek, neck and bare shoulder, his hands trailing down her hot, sweaty back.

"− mine −" He sighed out in a shaky voice from which a shudder ran through her, as if he was moved, as if his throat tightened with the tears of relief, regret and fulfilment.

Her hand, clenched earlier on his arm, rose higher, to his cheek, directing him to her face, to her mouth, which after a moment joined his in a loud, sticky kiss of their lips and tongues.

She heard him grunt in pleasure, his half-soft length pulsed inside her betraying that, true to his word, with short breaks he could do this all night.

"− no more, uncle − too much −" She mumbled, feeling like she wouldn't be able to walk because of him, her poor muscles were barely able to fit him in when he was fully ready to take her again.

"− mmm −" He hummed and kissed her forehead before his arms snuggled her face into the hollow of his neck; she sighed in relief as he slowly and gently pulled his manhood out of her, sliding his knee between her thighs, their bodies entwined in a hot embrace full of their scent, the smell of their moisture, of what they had done.

"− you did so well for me − I'll have your evening meal brought to your bed tomorrow − you need to rest −" He whispered, as if she had performed some heroic feat by allowing him to sink into her twice in the same night.

She thought with a smile of amusement as she snuggled into his sweaty skin, sticky from the exertion, that he himself could not imagine his body could survive something like this and not be sore.

He clearly understood her need for recuperation and that as her husband he could not dissuade her from this, as it turned out, overpoweringly pleasurable act.

Although she tried to sleep, she kept returning her thoughts to what they had done, to the way he had undressed her, to his hot gaze filled with desire on the verge of madness when he had said to her, kneeling over her, untying his breeches with his fingers, that he needed to feel her, that he would not be violent.

She believed him, and he was not only not violent.

He was tender.

His soothing words, his slow thrusts full of uncertainty and longing, his eyebrows arched in pain as if he was suffering as much as she was, made her feel not that he was taking something away from her, but that they were experiencing something together, joining in each other's pain, never to be separated again.

She knew the wine had helped her to relax, her head humming wonderfully as each of his thrusts again and again teased some spot inside her from which shivers of pleasure ran through her.

"− you are so warm −" He whispered with pain, as if he had finally returned to his haven like a ship that had spent years on the open sea during storms and tempests; she could only moan at his words, stunned by the pleasure and how much he filled her, struggling to fit him inside her.

It was so rough, so simple, so natural.

At the same time she was afraid of the consequences of their actions, on the other hand she was happy and satisfied, because she no longer had to be afraid of their wedding night, of whether she would live up to his expectations, whether she would not disappoint him.

She knew that in this rather brutal and unobvious way they had regained something, the kind of closeness they had been deprived of, and although she knew that big words would not leave their mouths and that some things they would never forgive each other for, she felt relieved.

He tried to find common ground with her, to speak with her, to show her that he could control his aggression, his grief, that he would do it for her if she would only reciprocate, if she would also make the effort.

When she was awakened by the first rays of sunshine she turned lazily to the other side with a quiet creak of the bed, meeting his chest into which she snuggled in a subconscious need for closeness, his arms immediately enclosing her again in his embrace, a quiet sigh escaping from his nostrils.

It was so peaceful.

They both flinched and pulled themselves up when they heard the loud voices of the guards.

"Out! Get dressed, everyone to the dungeons! Immediately!" Shouted one of them; she hugged his arm, terrified as someone's fist slammed hard on the door of their chamber.

"Leave it, there is no one here. Lead them to the cells, we need to find Prince Aemond and his little whore." Said the other man. She looked at him in disbelief, feeling the rapid pounding of her heart. She saw that he was breathing fast, in his eye confusion and something else.

Fear.

"Uncle, what's happening?" She asked in a trembling voice, feeling betrayal hovering in the air, thinking only that he had taken her because he knew something was coming, that he had lied to her, that he surely intended to expose her to mockery and humiliation, that they were plotting against her mother.

"I don't know." He said coldly, swallowing loudly, his voice breaking as if he himself was shocked. He got up quickly from the bed and began to dress hurriedly, not looking at her, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

"Uncle, please, tell me you didn't plan this." She mumbled with tears of pain, helplessness and grief in her eyes, covering her mouth, feeling her naked body begin to tremble.

Only then did he look at her, frowning his eyebrows as if he didn't understand what she had just said to him.

"Stop it. Don't panic. You have to stay here until I find out what happened. Don't open up to anyone and don't go anywhere, do you understand?" He asked matter-of-factly, fastening the buckles of his tunic. She did not answer him, laying down on the bed without strength, letting the tears run down her cheeks, looking blankly towards the door.

He approached her slowly, kneeling in front of her; she shuddered when his large, rough hand ran reassuringly over her bare back.

"− don't leave until I come back for you − lock the door behind me −" He said coolly, returning back to the stronghold of his mind, distancing himself, changing back into that terrifying man she didn't recognise.

She shuddered as he hummed under his breath and rose from his place, moving unhurriedly towards the door, pulling back the bolt only to disappear behind it a moment later.

She stood up on trembling legs, hurriedly putting on her nightgown, immediately locking the door, listening to the restless noises and sounds from outside.

What was happening?

Maybe she should run away, warn her mother?

But what if someone caught her, if there really was a rebellion?

There was nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide.

She had no idea what to do, didn't know if she could trust this man she had given herself to that night, who had taken her for himself only to leave.

She covered herself with thick blankets and sat in silence, thinking about everything that had happened between them, finding with mockery and regret that she had lost her guard, that she had allowed herself to feel safe in the lion's den and was now paying the price.

She thought with tears in her eyes that Daemon had warned her.

Her terror increased with each passing hour when he did not return for her and she already knew something serious had happened. She prayed with closed eyes to the gods of her ancestors, asking them for strength and courage at the moment of trail.

She had no intention of begging them for mercy.

Even though she had sensed it, even though she had repeated to herself that she had to prepare for it, the voice of Criston Cole banging his fist on the chamber door, ordering her to open it immediately made her feel a chill of disappointment and bitterness fall over her, a confirmation of her worst fears.

He had used her.

He had betrayed her.

She knew there was no point in resisting, because she had nowhere to run to anyway, so she opened up to him. Seeing her negligee and the fact that she was wearing only a nightgown, he ordered several servants to be brought in, who, as terrified as she was, helped her dress. Cole stood near her with his head turned away, pretending to give her any kind of privacy.

When he told her to leave she simply did so, walking at his side through the completely empty Red Keep; she felt her heart pounding like mad and wondered what could have happened.

Did they keep her to come to terms with her mother?

She pressed her lips together at the thought, feeling tears of shame under her eyelids, and lifted her chin higher, refusing to let them flow, recognising that whatever happened, she would remain true to her family, that she would never allow herself to be humiliated in such a way again.

She was startled when Ser Criston led her to her old chamber, where the Queen was already waiting for her; she stood up at the sight of her, fiddling with the rings on her fingers.

She saw to her horror that she had open wounds around her nails that were bleeding.

The door behind them closed with a loud clatter of wood and they stood facing each other in silence for a moment – Cole stood just behind her, apparently making sure she didn't try to do anything that might endanger the Queen.

She should have bowed to her, but she didn't, looking straight into her eyes with fatigue and sadness, seeing in her gaze that what she suspected was happening was happening, that perhaps after her husband-king supported the idea of her and her son marrying again, Alicent and her father had proceeded to act.

She wondered if they had killed him.

"The King is dead, my love." The Queen said softly, and she involuntarily smiled, as if it amused her. She saw the discomfort on her face from which she felt satisfaction, a mental advantage she could use.

She answered nothing.

"Before he passed away, he confessed to me that he wished my eldest son to be crowned as his successor." She said in a voice straining for calm, and she burst into uncontrollable laughter full of mockery and disbelief, involuntarily covering her mouth with her hand, shaking her head.

He was busying himself with her body as they crowned this drunkard and fool King.

"You had it all planned, didn't you? Is that why you kept me here?" She asked coldly. Alicent shook her head quickly, pale, her fingers involuntarily began to scratch the wounds around her nails.

"No. I know you both ran away yesterday. What you did. You need to tell me if my son did this against your will. Do you need help." She muttered, lowering her gaze, as if she was overwhelmed with shame at the thought of what she had apparently imagined in her head.

She snorted under her breath, looking at her in disbelief, wondering if this was part of their game, or if they wanted to fool her into not knowing what was true and what wasn't anymore.

"Your son has done nothing against my will. I want to return to Dragonstone." She said dispassionately, wondering if she felt now as he did when he lost his eye, when she didn't come to him that night, when in his mind she chose her family over his.

An overwhelming emptiness.

"It's impossible." The Queen said in a trembling voice. She looked at her with rage, feeling fire rather than blood pulsing through her veins, her lips clenched into a thin line.

"I am your prisoner now?" She grinned feeling her whole body begin to quiver in rage.

Eternally pretending to be saints and wronged, fucking traitors.

"It would be better if we make sure there are no unpleasant…consequences." She said tiredly, as if she hadn't noticed her anger or heard her question; at her words her heart stopped, her anger turned to sudden, overpowering fear, cold sweat on the back of her neck.

No.

No. No. No. No. No. No.

"No. You will not force me." She said in a trembling voice, stepping backwards, falling right into Criston Cole's hands, which clamped painfully tight on her arms, like pincers from which she could not break free.

"Please, do not resist. It will be better for all of us." Said the Queen and nodded, the door to her chamber opened; she looked in horror at the servant with the small kettle and vessel, behind her several guards stepped inside.

She shook her head, breathing loudly through her mouth, looking at her pleadingly, feeling tears squeezing under her eyelids.

She didn't want this, this was her body, if the gods so chose, her child could grow in her womb.

"− no, please, please, please −" She mumbled, forgetting what she had promised herself, her dignity, her coolness, for here, though she was filled with the seed of a man who had betrayed her, who had humiliated her, the fruit of that could be a child she could perhaps love, who would possibly be the cause of any reason for joy in her life.

With the eyes of her imagination she saw a small, laughing child with his white hair and her bright eyes looking at the great vessel from which steam was rising, warming the dragon's egg.

She felt the guard's hand clamp down on her cheeks, tilting her head back, forcing her to open her mouth, warm tears running down her cheeks. A squeal broke from her throat as the other man began to pour the disgusting liquid into her mouth − she tried to spit it out but to no avail, she felt it run down her throat.

It was done.

When they finally let her go she simply fell to the ground, her breath loud, shuddering and hitched, her face red with tears of sorrow.

Some part of her wondered why he wasn't here, why he hadn't stopped it, whether he had wanted to condemn her to such suffering from the very beginning.

She heard the rustling of Alicent's gown as she approached her slowly, felt her hand on her back and moved away immediately, looking at her with hatred.

"Get out." She said to her coldly without any courtesy.

She could see the tears in her eyes but decided that they were mere theatre, that she had no right to sympathise after what she and her son had done to her.

She felt Criston Cole grab her tightly by her hair, tilting her head back in a sudden, violent gesture.

"How dare you speak to your Queen this way, you…" He didn't finish as she spat in his face; he closed his eyes quickly and hissed, wiping away her saliva with his hand. She heard Alicent scream as he slapped her across the face with all his strength − she fell to the floor, panting heavily, feeling like everything was spinning around her.

"As mother, so daughter. Fucking whore."

"Criston, for gods sake! Get out, now, all of you!" The Queen shouted, pulling him away from her; she could hear his enraged breath, and after a moment, he and the others assembled stepped back, leaving one by one.

Although she could feel her gaze on her, she no longer bestowed a single glance on the mother of the man who only a few hours ago had been the one she had chosen.

"It will be better this way. I wish to come to an agreement with your mother so that she can marry you off to her cousin according to her will. Rest now." She whispered in a trembling, quiet voice and left, closing the door behind her. She heard the sound of the key turning in the lock.

I wish to come to an agreement with your mother so that she can marry you off to her cousin according to her will.

She grinned involuntarily at the thought that her uncle had never had any intention of defying his mother, that this was all just a spectacle, his revenge − that he would marry one of Lord Baratheon's daughters, that he would watch with pride and satisfaction as she walked away, stripped of virtue and dignity, robbed of everything she could value in herself as a woman.

She lay on the cold stone floor for a moment, staring blankly ahead, feeling that the cheek Criston Cole had slapped her on was pulsing all over. After a moment her hand slowly slid down to her womb; she clamped her fingers on the material of her gown and wept quietly, clenching her eyes shut, allowing herself to experience some kind of grief.

She lasted like this for some time, wondering what she should do and she decided that there was no other choice.

As long as she was here her mother had no option to act, she could not reclaim the crown that was her inheritance.

She thought she was to blame and had to rise to the occasion now.

She had to make a manly decision, as Daemon had always told her, and turn the situation around, take back their advantage.

When she was still a child, her mother had given her a small dagger, which she had told her to keep in a place only she knew of, so that when she needed to defend herself against someone she could reach for it.

She stood up slowly, heading calmly towards her bed, putting her hand deep between the wooden frame and the bedding − she smiled involuntarily as she felt the cold steel beneath her fingers.

She pulled it out, laying back comfortably on the bedclothes, turning it in her hands, thinking that this was her escape, proof of her independence, of the fact that she had the last word.

She hesitated for a moment as she pressed the blade to her wrist, feeling terror, fear of death and of pain, regret that she could still see so much, experience so much.

She sighed quietly and felt tears running down the sides of her face onto the pillow under her head as she began to slice her skin with her trembling hand − she shuddered when she saw that immediately blood began to run from the red line.

She pressed her lips together trying to hold back a hiss of discomfort as she repeated the cut on her other wrist, and then just lay back, feeling the rapid pounding of her terrified heart, thinking with sorrow that she had never felt so alone and miserable than she did now, at the moment of her death.

She wondered if this was how he had felt that night when he lost his eye and cried, mourning for herself and the little boy who had died then.

_____

Aemond Taglist:

(bold means I couldn't tag you)

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[wileys-russo]

grace clinton, “i forgot it gets dark at 6….”, pitch

was struggling to finish this so changed up the location! the best view II g.clinton

"baby come on! you'll love it." your girlfriend begged as you shook your head again, eyes focused on the monitor in front of you. "i need to study and i can promise you i won't." you chuckled with a shake of your head.

"its just a lookout babe, and we can take a little picnic, watch the sunset, very romantic!" the girl bargained as you only hummed, half listening as you scribbled down the key points you'd need to use to bulk up your opening argument.

"grace!" you huffed when she snatched your pen out of your hand, swooping next for your notebook and holding them behind her back making you groan. "we're going, i've decided. think of it as a self care break baby." she announced still with a grin, thick scouser accent always making the corner of your mouth tug up into a small smile.

"you're not going to give me a moment of peace until i agree, are you?" you sighed knowingly as your girlfriend shook her head stubbornly. "well exactly where is this wonderful view then clinton?"

your girlfriend had failed to mention that in order to get to this wonderful view she was so excited to show you, there was a hike nearly entirely uphill which had taken you around an hour to even get near to the top.

"are ya done sulking now?" the girl in question called from a few feet ahead with an amused grin, one you very much so wanted to slap off her face as you stopped with your arms crossed over your chest sending her the most deathly glare you could manage.

"taking that as a no." grace nodded as you strode off past her, ramming your shoulder into hers with a huff as you marched ahead, her chuckles behind you only spurring you to put as much distance between you both as possible.

but in hindsight that was not your smartest move as your girlfriend had to run to catch up with you, and while keeping a cautious eye that you were following the trail she missed the tree root which caught her ankle and sent her hurdling to the ground.

you heard her scream and whipped your head around, eyes widening as you hurried back to her and dropped down to the ground. "what happened!" you asked with a gasp, your girlfriend clutching her ankle with a moan of pain.

"fucking snapped me ankle on that stupid branch! which i wouldn't have had to if you wasn't running away." grace grunted, trying to roll it around and hissing with a wince.

"my fault? this is my fault?" you scoffed in disbelief. "you dragged me on this stupid hike grace, and then you weren't watching where you went and you tripped over! see the common factor babe? you!" you huffed standing to your feet.

"yeah alright alright fine. you're gonna have to carry us baby, i think its broken." grace backed down with a scowl at her ankle as you raised an eyebrow. "lets try to get you up." you spoke softer this time as she nodded, reaching her hands up which you took in your own.

"okay on three? one, two-" you pulled her up and the blonde let out a squeal before her weight collapsed into you and sent the pair of you tumbling back to the ground with a thump.

"you're a head taller than me. this is not going to be easy!" you groaned as you rolled off of her, both of you dusting yourselves off with a sigh. "well we don't have a choice baby, at least its all downhill?" she smiled charmingly as you rolled your eyes.

"okay, but we go at my pace."

"baby..." you inhaled sharply as the girl on your back started to speak once again after you'd banned her from doing so, her running commentary and attempts at conversation as you were struggling to catch your breath.

"have you maybe perhaps thought that-" she started cautiously as you exhaled, shifting her on your back with a grunt. "i'd urge you to think very very carefully about your next words grace, or i will drop you on your ass and leave you here for the wolves." you warned.

"okay first; we don't have wolves here. second; do you think we could maybe go just a little bit faster? the sun is...setting." the girl spoke softly as you stopped for a second, feeling her grip on you tighten as she panicked you would in fact drop her.

"well. whose bright fucking idea was an afternoon sunset hike grace?" you spoke calmly before you kept walking, your legs absolutely burning but you knew with each step you got closer to the bottom where your car was waiting.

"stop with the grace baby, you're hurtin me worse than the ankle." your girlfriend huffed as you rolled your eyes. "and i forgot it gets dark at six..." she trailed off as you hummed, the sky rapidly darkening with each fleeting moment.

"i will hurt you much worse than a rolled ankle if I get lost and trapped here in the dark with my useless one legged girlfriend." you grunted, adjusting her again as your neck twanged.

"harsh, but fair." grace sighed and you sagged a little in relief as finally after a few moments of silence you could see the car. "not a word grace, not a word." you warned hearing her open her mouth to make a comment as it quickly snapped shut again.

"you sit. i'll bring the car around." you lowered her down onto a bench and grabbed the keys from her pocket, though spotting a sign you stopped right in your tracks, squinting as you read it over and over.

"baby what are you-" the girl hobbled over to you, sagging her body into you as she fell silent reading what you had been before, feeling you tense up beside her.

"grace. the park closes at six, the gates are locked at six, it is now six twenty two." you spoke terrifyingly calm, your girlfriend rapidly hopping away from you on one leg with wide eyes as you turned.

"baby now before you speak i want you to remember this sunset hike was just me trying to be romantic, and loving, and kind, and sweet, and-"

"come here clinton i'm gonna snap your other ankle!"

[sylusjinwoon]

{ 183 }

slow it down.

academy arc

jinwoo sung x fem.reader

{ ain't it funny how it changes? | how the future rearranges | i get nervous, oh, i'm anxious | maybe loving you is dangerous. }

you lived in a relatively safe neighborhood, spending most of your childhood years in the same area. your parents had a good relationship with the other families, yet you didn't find many teens close to your age.

any children that lived close by tended to be in their elementary or middle school years. at times, you were hired to babysit them for a couple of hours when needed, and other than that, you had little to no interaction with the neighborhood kids.

it wasn't until you began your second year of high school that a brand new family moved into the neighborhood.

they were settled in the house to the right of your own home, and their move was quite the event for your tight-knit cul-de-sac. as you watched the large moving truck and the men that carried the heavy furniture within their new home, you couldn't help but wonder if they had any kids.

as you observe the scene from the safety of your window, you suddenly saw a tall boy stepping out into the yard. the mere sight of him was enough to make you straighten in response. with your lips parted, you felt as though your breath was stolen from you at the mere sight of him.

he was dressed casually in a simple shirt and jeans. he had perfectly styled ebony locks of hair with strands that fell across his forehead, coupled along with stormy grey eyes. the perfect clarity of such eyes was what kept you mesmerized as you watched him, noticing the way his full lips were tilted up in a half smile.

as if sensing your gaze, the boy suddenly turns his head, seeing your curious gaze from behind your glass window. a sudden heat was felt creeping up your skin, pure embarrassment at being caught staring at him. like you were a deer caught in the headlights, you were frozen, unable to look away from him or step away from the window, being completely and utterly rooted to the spot.

but he doesn't show you an expression of disgust or disdain when meeting your gaze-

instead, he smiles at you sweetly, lifting up a hand to give you a wave before turning away from you, as if hearing someone calling out his name.

"oppa! mom says she needs your help!" a cute girl looking to be around 9 or 10 years old with light brown hair and matching eyes starts pulling on his hand, making him chuckle before he disappears back into the house, leaving your heart a pounding mess.

that was the first time you had ever seen sung jinwoo, the boy who had become your new neighbor. he appeared to be close to your age, and you briefly wondered if he would attend the same high school as you.

your suspicions were confirmed when you saw him just a week later, donning the male version of your school's uniform. he was walking several feet in front of you, yet you kept a safe distance away from him. despite how much you longed to talk to him, your lack of confidence prevented you from doing so.

when their move was complete, your parents went over to introduce themselves to the family with some gifted pastries in hand. it was through them that you realized that they were known as the sung family, with their oldest son, jinwoo, being the same age as you. you were shy even then, unable to bring yourself to meet the new neighbors as you made up an excuse about needing to complete some homework.

after all, you still felt so awkward at being caught staring at him so blatantly when he first moved here.

but now that jinwoo was heading to the same school as you, you knew you were running out of excuses to avoid him.

so, you kept trying to keep a fair distance between you and him. however, luck didn't seem to be on your side when jinwoo physically stops, glancing behind him to see you walking the exact same path as him.

even when he was further away from you, you could have sworn you saw his eyes glow momentarily when he takes casual strides back to you. his hands were kept hidden within the pockets of his jacket when he greets you, "morning neighbor."

"h-hey, good morning." you tried to hide how flustered you felt, brushing back your hair while simply looking ahead. jinwoo ends up walking beside you, silently bringing you closer against the safety of the sidewalk whilst he took the side that was close to the open road. his quiet kindness fills your heart with warmth, and your ears perk when he introduces himself.

"i'm sung jinwoo."

you tell him your own name, and he repeats it with the same lazy smile he had given you that first day you had seen him. "what homeroom are you in?"

"ah, i'm in class 2-b."

jinwoo clicks his tongue in response. "that's disappointing. i'm in 2-c."

you pursed your lips, unsure as to why he felt disappointed to begin with. you continue walking in silence beside jinwoo, arriving at your school as several girls begin giggling at the sight of him.

"oh, who's that?"

"i heard that's the new transfer student."

"he is so cute. i'm going to talk to him later."

your eyes go wide, hearing everyone's whispers, but jinwoo seemed unfazed. he simply ignores them all, placing a hand behind your back while walking you to your class. once class 2-b was in sight, he removes his hand from you and gives you another smile, "have a nice day, and wait for me. i'll walk home with you when classes end."

and when jinwoo leaves you all alone, heading to his own class, you felt your heart performing somersaults from within your chest.

he truly was the perfect, boy-next-door type.

soft,

achingly handsome,

kind-

it came as no surprise that he had you so captivated in such a short amount of time.

{ ... }

ever since jinwoo and his family moved into your neighborhood, both of your families developed a deep friendship. your parents would invite the sungs over for dinner, while they would do the same.

and each time, jinwoo would always be there, wishing to sit next to you as his little sister, jinah, would sit across from him, teasing him throughout the night like little sisters would do to their older brothers.

yet it felt like as you and jinwoo got to know each other better, he would start steadily begin displaying his interests and affections toward you.

when he came over for dinner, he would purposely sit across the table from you, and you swore you could feel his legs gently intertwining with yours while giving you a soft smile. such intimate touches were enough to make your head spin, and you admittedly struggled to keep a straight face while making casual conversation with everyone at dinner.

you walked to school together every morning, and when jinwoo had track practice, you would end up waiting for him, simply working on your homework while seated on the metal benches. once he completed practice, he would come to you, dressed in his track clothes with his duffel bag in hand, ready to walk home with you.

it was a routine you had gotten used to, yet you wondered what type of relationship you had with jinwoo.

at the moment, it seemed too easy to simply refer to jinwoo as your best friend. oh no, the way he treated you teetered on the edge of being far too intimate-

far more romantic, in a sense.

but he never put a label on how he felt about you, and you never asked.

as you were caught up in your reveries, you were simply reading by the light of your nightlight, not really taking in the paragraphs or what was going on within the plot of the novel. when you found yourself re-reading a certain phrase over and over again, you gave up reading and slammed your book shut.

that was when you heard it-

several tiny taps felt against your window.

with a frown, you place your book on your bed and go to your window, eyes going wide when you see jinwoo on the ground with a handful of pebbles in hand. opening your window, you called out to him in hushed tones, not wishing to awaken your parents.

"jinwoo! what are you doing here?"

he gives you a smile, "it's the weekend, come on and take a walk with me."

you look around your house and bite down at your bottom lip. "i can't... my parents will kill me if they see me gone."

"don't worry about it... it's late and they're in a deep sleep. come on, climb out your window, and i'll catch you."

you could feel your heart skipping its beats at the sight of jinwoo with his arms outstretched, ready to catch you as his eyes were once more glowing purple with mirth.

a part of you didn't want to face your parent's wrath for sneaking out so late at night-

yet the stronger, more irrational part of you wanted to be with jinwoo and spend some time with him.

letting out a sigh, you climb out your window with your eyes clenched shut, taking a plunge when you allowed your body to fall directly into jinwoo's arms.

he captures and holds you with ease, letting out a hum of your name before proceeding to carry you out of the parameters of your home. feeling his grip on you tighten makes your face heat up, and you weakly tell him how you could walk-

but jinwoo simply shakes his head, "i don't mind holding you like this, sarang."

your heartbeat became erratic at the sound of that term of endearment, making your mouth go dry when he continues to carry you to a nearby park illuminated with a few streetlights. he keeps walking with you in his arms, not stopping until he reaches a hilltop. with his destination achieved, he sets you down on the grass before sitting next to you.

feeling jinwoo's warmth radiating off of him, you tried to ignore staring at him as you honed in your gaze at the night sky, admiring its beauty as you could see the crescent moon illuminating the night sky as the stars twinkled in response.

"i thought i had plans of meeting someone i once loved and admired."

jinwoo's sudden words and confession makes your heart twist a bit painfully in response. you end up facing him with a questioning glance and a tilt of your head, "is that so?"

he doesn't meet your gaze, simply continuing to look up at the skies. "yeah, i know that she's a star athlete... with track being her strong suit. i joined our school's track team in hopes of meeting her in a competition someday..."

"oh..." you prayed that your voice didn't show just how disappointed and hurt you felt, yet all feelings of pain disappears into thin air with jinwoo's next words.

"but ever since my dad had a promotion, and we moved here, such a change brought me to you instead."

you felt his hand reaching out to you, gently taking a hold of your chin with his gloved hand as you were forced to meet his gaze. his eyes were still glowing a vibrant, violet hue, yet this time, you could see the affection and adoration in his gaze.

"and i found myself not caring about that other girl anymore... i found myself not caring about anyone that wasn't you."

jinwoo lets out a rich chuckle upon seeing your wide-eyed, yet hopeful expression, resting his forehead against yours. "you're so damn cute. i love how i'm able to live so close to you. i get to see you every morning, and walk home with you every evening. you mean everything to me... and i can't help but wonder if me being here with you was simply fate."

your heart was practically skipping beats now, feeling warm and soft all over when he leans in closer to press a kiss against your forehead. upon feeling such a gentle sensation did you finally find your voice as you spoke, "is this really happening... jinwoo... i... i've had the biggest crush on you. e-ever since i first laid eyes on you, i was so mesmerized by you."

you felt his smile against your skin, feeling him kiss your forehead one more time before meeting your gaze again, "i could say the same to you... ever since i saw your cute face watching me from your window, i was hooked."

"so let me put us both out of our miseries and do this..." jinwoo trails off before leaning in closer to you to perfectly slot his lips against yours in a sweet kiss, making you let out a dreamy sigh in response as you carefully kissed him back, basking in the softness and first blossoms of true love while in his embrace.

{ so slow it down, take a moment now | we're too young to drown deep in dirty waters | full of hopeless doubt, let me pull you out | let me hold you now, let me slow it down. }

a.n. - i had another fluffy and soft jinwoo brainrot.... i was thinking about boy-next-door jinwoo and felt my heart melt at the thought.... hhh i needed to get this fluffy story out of my system; please do enjoy (/ω＼) ♡ this is currently unedited bc im lazy and exhausted lmaoooo

all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.

[moonselune]

Do you have any thoughts/headcanons for Astarion (and possibly Gale if that’s not being too greedy) with a tav/durge that’s first language isn’t common so they sometimes blank on a word and it occasionally makes them insecure about being the leader! Thank you Angel<3

Ooo so this is a bit short but I love the idea of this !

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Astarion:

OooOo he would adore this

watching your fumble for the right word

so adorable and endearing

he's jsut such a perfect gentleman sweeping in and finding the right word for you

that wasn't it? But he thought you had a rather salacious vocabulary

adores it when you speak your mother tongue

turns him on to no end

but when you are feeling insecure, he will be serious

he will be there for you

he will listen to you rant even as you switch languages half way through and if he doesn't know what you are talking about he will at least pretend that he does

Gale:

Gale would find it so cute when you struggle for the right word, always ready to chime in and help you

he has a practised tongue remember?

and an extensive vocabulary

he often says words that you could not even deduce the meaning of

but you are very appeciative of his help

most of the time

other times you could hit him over the head with a book with long rants he ends up going on explaining to root of the word and it's derivations and blah blah blah

but when you show insecurity about not being able to find the right word, and Gale sees that you are upset

this man sits down and learns your entire language

it takes him a while and he may butcher the pronounciation

but the fact he tried actually just brings you to tears

you help him learn it properly and it becomes a fun thing between the two of you

[v7lgar]

Mayhaps james walking in on barty eating reg out

NSFW | 658 words | tw: cheating

James knew whatever happened between Barty and Regulus, it didn't end when he and Regulus started dating.

It wasn't that he didn't trust Regulus, it was because he knew Barty. He knew Barty was addictive, he had been there.

Before Barty and Regulus, it was James and Barty.

But yeah, he couldn't blame Regulus for that, because he got it, he really did. It was hard to resist him. He wasn't even sure he properly got over Barty, that topic was more like a deep-buried subject.

So it wasn't unexpected when he walked on them.

They didn't notice him at first, they were busy enough to not notice.

Regulus was in his Quidditch uniform, and that was the only thing covering his body. His legs were spread and Barty was between his legs, and by the sound of it, he was having a delicious meal.

“Fuck— your tongue,” he heard Regulus’ loud moan, they weren't even trying to keep it secretive.

As far as he could see, Barty was eating him out, and James was familiar with what his tongue could do to a man.

“I want it, I need your fingers in me too, oh fuck—”

Regulus arched while grabbing Barty’s messy brown hair and pushed him onto his pussy. James took a step towards them, not hiding behind the door anymore.

He couldn't see if Barty did what Regulus asked, he was nearly controlling himself, he took further steps until they noticed his presence.

“Well, well,” he said in a mocking tone, “Bon appetit, Barty.”

Regulus and Barty looked at him at the same time, he could read from their expressions that they didn't even consider getting caught, and that made him laugh.

“Fuck, James—” Regulus began, but Barty cut him off, “Wanna join?” he offered to James before diving into Regulus’ pussy like what they were doing wasn't wrong.

James got closer to them and Regulus wasn't even trying to not moan, whatever Barty was doing, it was good.

James didn't answer, instead, he got on the bed right next to where Regulus was laying his head on the pillow and he started unzipping his pants.

Barty lifted his head from eating Regulus’ pussy, “Oh, so you are gonna join. Didn't see that coming.”

James didn't take his eyes off of him as he got his half-hard cock out and he stroked himself from base to the top. He was getting harder and harder just looking at his boyfriend getting eaten out by his ex-fuckbuddy and he wasn't even going to deny that what he witnessed was hot as fuck.

“Open your mouth,” James ordered and Regulus slowly parted his lips, he was ready to take him in his mouth, maybe he was as starving as Barty.

“Fuck, I'm sure I saw this exact moment in my dreams.”

James ignored Barty and shoved his cock into Regulus’ hot mouth, lips wrapping against his dick. He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, he dipped his fingers in his hair to control his mouth.

Regulus grabbed him by his balls as James liked and opened his mouth wider, James was thick and even though Regulus could take him all inside, it was still a bit hard at first.

He watched how Barty was sucking his boyfriend's pretty pussy, he could see how wet he was from Barty’s mouth area. It was all over him, and he also could see clear that Barty was three fingers in him, fucking his cunt with them as he sucked him off.

James couldn't decide which one was more arousing, seeing his exes going at it or watching them while getting sucked off by his pretty-cheating boyfriend.

Well, he had enough time to decide.

He grabbed Regulus from the roots of his hair and slammed his cock down his throat, fucking it fast.

He wanted to show them what he got, and then leave them for good.

[genericpuff]

Persephone has a very nasty habit that needs to be talked about.

Have y'all ever really sat down and observed the when of Persephone's actions towards others?

There are three actions specifically I want you to recall and try and remember what happened preceding those actions:

1.) Persephone turning Minthe into a mint plant

2.) Persephone cornering Tori at his job

3.) Persephone invading Leuce's home with barn animals and low key threatening her life

Think very hard for a second about the when of those events. What happened leading up to them?

First, Persephone turning Minthe into a mint plant. This happened right after she made out with Hades at the shopping mall, but more specifically, this happened while she was hiding out in Hades' home from Zeus, while also fearing the worst of her situation with Apollo.

Second, Persephone cornering Tori at his job. This scene came right after she saw the "Apollo for President" sign in Olympus.

And third, Persephone invading Leuce's home. This came shortly after she had felt insecure over Hades calling Hera 'Bunny', which for some reason she pinned on her own "jealousy" instead of calling out the elephant in the room.

It also came right after the Zeus/Dionysus incident and Demeter trying to force her to stay in the Mortal Realm, but I think the Hera incident is the most damning because it's the most related to Persephone's clear insecurities that are being compounded by dating / being married to a serial cheater.

What do all three of these things tell us about Persephone?

It shows that Persephone has a bad habit of projecting all of her problems onto other people that have nothing to do with the bigger issues.

Minthe ratted her out, yes, but she was still running from her inevitable trial, attempting to use the Underworld's policies to play the system and get herself off as scot-free as possible. I mentioned this already in a previous post, but these aren't the actions of a person who claims to feel as guilty as they do over committing mass manslaughter. Point is, she would have gotten caught eventually, and she still had to answer for her crimes. Minthe was an easier target for her anger and frustration than Zeus.

Tori gossiped about her in college, yes, but it came from a very real incident in which Hades ripped out his roommate's eye and beat him half to death. Tori wasn't even gossiping at that point, he was deadass just telling his side of the story and warning people that Persephone was affiliating herself with an abusive man. None of what he said about her being "Hades' dark concubine" was untrue, but he had the unfortunate luck of being at the bank right after Persephone was triggered by the Apollo sign. Tori was just an easier target for her anger and frustration than Apollo.

Leuce attempted to 'seduce' Hades, yes, but she was manipulated by Thetis in an attempt to get her planted just like Minthe and I think a lot of people forget that. Not to mention, Persephone says that she had "ten years" to make the moves on Hades, but like... no she didn't, because Hades was either possessed by Kronos or in a coma for those 10 years, and then he got married to Persephone like 5 days after that LMAO (not saying that excuses her trying to seduce him, I'm just wondering when she was supposed to find the time in those 10 years to talk to him LOL). And finally, and most importantly, Hades had already rejected her advances. She was already embarrassed. She clearly wasn't going to attempt it again. She is of no threat to Persephone, the now wife of Hades and Queen of the Underworld. So Persephone raiding her home was purely just for her own entertainment and, again, to satisfy her own insecurities. Leuce was just an easier target for her anger and frustration than Hades and Hera.

Point is, instead of actually dealing with the root of her issues, seeking legitimate help for her trauma, and/or learning any amount of self-care techniques to manage her frustration and refocus herself on the bigger issues, Persephone is instead relegating herself to a bully who takes out all of her issues onto people weaker than her, oftentimes people who have nothing to do with those bigger issues or have no real bearing on her life.

I'm sure now that I've written about this (because I'm not 100% convinced Rachel isn't reading this lmao the odds are low but never zero) there's gonna be some arc where Persephone goes "aw, I saw the bigger issues but now I'm a different person so life goes on!" without actually doing anything to make up for how she's harmed people (there already is sort of a 'twist' like that in the newest FastPass and it's uh... yikes) but until that happens (again, odds are SEVERELY low but never zero) Persephone is literally the worst person in her own story. She doesn't need a sugar daddy, she doesn't need power, she needs some bitter doses of reality and, most importantly, help.

[hellwantfuckme]

shameless.

summary: she hates solstices, but Azriel has his own way of making her liking the solstices.

warnings: smut, fingering, oral (f receiving)

words: 4.7k

author's note: I'm not sure if I like this or I hate this. English isn't my first language and is my first time writing smut after years of reading it😭. Just let me know if you want a second part:).

Every solstice, since Eclipse was of use of reason, had been the day on which she had kept herself the furthest away from her family, from the paranoid mother, who was a ticking time bomb that when exploded burned and scorched forests, dried up oceans. From the exhausted father, who still maintained his mocking humor from his younger years, when he still had his youth, when the weight on his shoulders was light, unaware that the burden would increase over the years.

In reality, for years she had had a flame of hope under layers of sharp ice, that someday, they could spend the holidays in a somewhat normal way. But over time that flame had done nothing more than extinguish, leaving in its wake smoke. Smoke that filled her lungs and didn't let her breathe, smoke that oppressed her chest, that made her so overwhelmed that her eyes clouded with tears.

That smoke hadn't disappeared to this day.

The warm room by the fireplace, the orange light, gave her a perfect view of everything that was happening throughout the large, lively living room. She heard Cassian's laughter and Mor's insults towards him. The more or less trivial conversations among the rest that spread throughout the room like grains of sand in the sea.

Eclipse just knew she didn't have enough wine.

In reality, she hadn't wanted to be here, it was Feyre, who with puppy eyes, had almost begged her to attend. Just for one year, to try to see what they did, how they did it. And she promised that if she felt too overwhelmed she could leave.

Eclipse had been thinking of leaving since she had walked through the door and greeted every member of the inner circle, even those who didn't sit so well with her as Mor. She couldn't help but feel that, in some way, the smell of her anxiety would become thick enough for everyone present to smell it, even through the glamour she had put on the scent of her emotions, and ruin the party for them.

The glamour was a band-aid on the crack in the earthquake floor, it did nothing to help her mental state. She just took another sip of the expensive wine, if only she didn't have that suffocating predestined feeling rooted in her chest, she would have admired the taste of the good, very expensive wine.

The warmth in the room was probably just right to keep them comfortable in the cold winter, but Eclipse felt it was too much, even the thin dress with an opening that showed her leg and a tremendous neckline felt like too much.

Everything was too much.

But she could leave, right? She could get up from the corner of the couch where she had been sitting for the last half hour, leave, and no one would judge her. She had her issues with some people in this court, but everyone had matured enough not to judge her if she suddenly left, end of story.

The place next to her on the couch sank slightly under the weight of an Illyrian who smelled like cedar and mist. Some of the tension in her shoulders left her. Just a little.

He didn't say a word, just glanced at her. Eclipse knew that was enough for him to know everything she was wondering about; after all, he was the Spymaster.

But the look wasn't heavy on her, it wasn't overwhelming. Eclipse looked at him too, turning her head just slightly to meet his gaze.

He seemed relaxed; it was one of the few times Eclipse saw him without his usual Illyrian leathers, without the bright siphons. Eclipse knew he enjoyed these festivities, the solstices. She could understand why, his family, probably the most precious thing to him, all in one room. No problems or anxieties or fights. Just them.

Another reason why Eclipse didn't feel like part of all this. She looked away.

Azriel drank in every expression of hers, hated the tension in her shoulders and back. Hated the way her brow furrowed slightly, her fingers squeezing the wine glass. Something inside him urged him to provide her with comfort of any kind.

Maybe it was because he had already consumed a reasonable amount of wine, maybe it was because he couldn't bear to see her so uncomfortable, especially in a time when she was supposed to be happy. Each of his cousins had managed to overcome whatever was haunting them because something was still threatening them, and Eclipse seemed to be doing the same, until the solstice. Where everything fell apart. Azriel wondered why and only remembered the firm, somewhat sad words Nesta had once said about Eclipse:

"We all demanded too much of her," Nesta had begun, speaking in the past, her voice tinged with regret. Cassian's hand had rested on hers, offering support for whatever she was feeling. "And she accepted it, she dealt with it as best as she could. If she still can't handle the festivities, if they're still too much for her, no one will demand that she heal quickly, get over it all at once, and fit into this too."

Azriel wondered if her words were, in addition, a reflection of how she would have liked them to behave around her when she was still struggling with constant bad habits.

He thought for a second, just one more look at the anxiety dancing in her eyes was enough fuel. Azriel placed his hand on her exposed knee.

Eclipse froze, her gaze slowly dropped to where their skins met, looked for a second, two. Insecurity filled Azriel; he was almost sure she was looking at his scars, and his own shoulders tensed.

But just a second later, as though she had sensed his intention to pull away, her hand settled on top of his. A gesture so natural, comfortable even, that it made his heart skip a beat.

Eclipse leaned back against the couch's backrest, bringing the edge of the dark red wine glass to her lips for a slow sip. She looked at him again, with a half-expectant look, bright with what, if he didn't know any better, he would describe as innocence, and the touch went from simply resting her hand there to a gentle, firm grasp.

Firm enough to keep her grounded. To keep her from wandering in whatever was tormenting her.

Eclipse refrained from licking her lips, definitely not wanting to ruin the lipstick.

"You know, maybe you should stop wearing those leathers so often, you look good, more than good." The comment escaped her lips with such naturalness, sincerity, that Azriel couldn't help but feel his cheeks redden slightly. The words stuck in his throat.

"I don't mean you don't look good in that outfit either, just that..."

Eclipse's hesitant words stopped as she noticed the color in his cheeks, a tiny smile pulled at Eclipse's lips.

"I'm sorry, I think I've had too much wine."

"No," Azriel hurried to reassure. "It's okay. You look... splendid, absolutely."

His eyes drifted away from her face, roved over the exposed collarbones, the particularly tattooed one underneath. "Born to die." Then over the neckline of her dress, and he couldn't help but linger there a fraction of a second, no more than what was appropriate.

Eclipse, it seemed, hadn't noticed the way his eyes had moved. Her cheeks had a barely noticeable blush, her gaze slightly lowered, embarrassed, he recognized quickly. Then it was Azriel who couldn't help the amused little smile that tugged at his lips.

His hand moved up her exposed leg slowly. Her heart skipped a beat as Azriel continued to raise it almost too slowly, her own hand still on top of his. It climbed until it was on her thigh, moving his hand so that it was on the inside, burying his fingers minimally.

Eclipse held her breath, her cheeks turning a darker pink. Her eyebrows arched just slightly, looking at Azriel out of the corner of her eye, but he looked straight ahead, as if nothing was happening, as if her pulse wasn't racing, her heart hammering against her chest as the contact burned.

Eclipse swallowed, and took a sip of wine, her head spinning.

I probably should be thinking that they were in a room full of people, and Azriel had his hand buried in the middle of her. But as she glanced around the room, and felt Azriel's hand moving inch by inch upwards, so slowly that she felt like she was going crazy, no one was really paying attention. Mor and Cassian laughing at something Nesta had said, and Rhys with a furrowed brow. Eclipse thought she heard something about the smaller wingspan of the three Illyrians in the background. She didn't really pay attention. Feyre and Elain were chatting quietly across the room while Amren was sitting in Varian's lap, the heir of the Summer Court leaning in to whisper something in her ear.

Azriel buried his fingers more forcefully. Eclipse crossed her legs with the intention of pushing Azriel's hand away, feeling the soft wetness between her legs increase.

She thanked every existing entity for the glamour to her emotions that she had put on before entering, and thanked Rhysand for teaching her how to put on and take off glamours months ago, because otherwise the smell of her arousal would be out there, mingling with the air particles.

Azriel looked at her, although she didn't dare to look back at him until his hand slipped between her crossed legs and separated them, resting the back of her thigh against the couch again, guiding her leg to spread further than before. Her heart skipped a beat, and she looked up at him.

There was something shining in those hazel eyes, something primal well hidden. Heavy eyelids as she swore he was devouring her with his gaze. His hand dug deeper, higher, until it was inappropriately close to her center, and he squeezed the tender skin.

Eclipse looked around the entire room again; she really didn't want anyone to see this interaction, especially because she was aware that she was blushing. Azriel seemed to understand, leaning in, his body blocking out hers. His mouth mere inches from her ear, as if about to whisper something. His wing engulfed them, darkening what she saw, giving her only an illusion of privacy that she didn't fall into so easily. But at least it hid the direction of his hand.

A musky smell, carrying Azriel's essence, softly reached her nostrils. The almost imperceptible scent of his arousal. She might have sighed.

His hand continued its path, shamelessly upwards, until the pads of his fingers brushed the skin extremely close to her panties. She heard Cassian's voice in the background, slightly louder.

"Azriel," Eclipse gasped, with a soft warning tone, but Azriel just let out a soft growl.

His fingers touched the damp fabric of her panties, more roughly than he had been fondling her thigh. His fingers pressed onto the wet patch, and Eclipse grabbed his wrist, stopping him instantly.

"All of this for me?" Azriel purred. Eclipse didn't miss the subtle amusement in his voice. His hand stayed still, but his fingers were still pressed, right above her nerve.

"I think you're the same or worse, Azriel," she didn't need to look down at the bulge in his pants to know what was there.

A shadow curled into Azriel’s ear, and he tensed. He immediately pulled away, returning to his previous position, his scarred hand on her knee.

Eclipse looked at him, totally confused, wondering what had caused his attitude to change so abruptly. She sighed through her nose, her gaze wandering around the room again.

Feyre had a little smile tugging at her lips, one she tried to hide ridiculously while looking at her, in particular.

A gentle caress against her mental barriers, ones that were still not very strong but were on their way to, Eclipse reluctantly let Feyre in.

"So close Azriel was just a few seconds ago..." her cousin's voice, amused, curious, and eager for gossip, sounded in her head. Eclipse refrained from rolling her eyes, feeling Azriel's gaze on her.

"I had forgotten how absolutely nosey you are."

A giggle sounded in her mind.

"Cassian has been teasing Morrigan, didn't understand why until I looked where he looked for a second."

Eclipse inevitably cast a glance at Cassian, who was now listening attentively to something Nesta was saying. She looked back at her cousin.

"I think Azriel felt me looking, that's why he moved away."

"You think, Feyre? How do you know?" She sarcastically replied, sweeping Feyre out of her mind, raising her mental barriers again. Feyre just chuckled, Rhys then looked at her, as if he wanted to know where the source of her amusement was coming from.

Eclipse sighed, taking another sip of her almost-empty glass of wine at this point.

At the end of the night, they had decided to go to Rita's. Neither Eclipse nor Azriel had wanted to go, although Mor gave them both a suspicious look, with some tension on her shoulders. She insisted a little more than everyone, a little more on Azriel, to go to that club. Eclipse wanted to ignore it, really wanted to. But she couldn't, especially not when their gazes connected, and Eclipse didn't like what she saw. The glint of jealousy in her eyes appeared and disappeared, barely a millisecond, but she saw it clearly.

She had never particularly liked Morrigan, or at least not since Eclipse started exchanging words with Azriel and she tensed every time they had the slightest interaction.

Eclipse made sure to keep the real, and somewhat venomous, opinion to herself.

Azriel's hand had moved very little from her knee the whole time they were sitting there, although his thumb traced circles. And he gave gentle squeezes every time Eclipse seemed to get lost in her own, hurtful, thoughts.

Eclipse felt a ghostly touch on her calf, she didn't have to look down to know it was one of his shadows. They swirled around her soft skin, and at one point, they seemed to bite her, only gently. Her cheeks took on a pinkish hue as she found herself looking for a way to lean into the contact that wasn't quite a contact. Eclipse had the feeling that the bite was just to see how she would react.

The dark irregularities crept up her skin, slowly, torturously. They crawled, sending shivers all over her skin, climbing and climbing until they caressed the inner part of her thigh. Eclipse had the impulse to close her legs, but Azriel kept a firm grip on her knee, preventing her from closing them together. The shadows explored what they wanted, all the skin they had available, without really reaching what was the desired center of her.

Eclipse found his gaze, fixed on her as if he were studying every reaction, memorizing every small expression with dilated pupils, heavy eyelids.

Eclipse opened her mouth, ready to make a comment, but before any sound could come out of her mouth, the ghostly sensation danced over her panties, swirling in circles above the fabric. Her teeth found home on her own lip, refraining from moving closer. The touch was hesitant, curious. But not enough, Eclipse had an idea of what would be enough.

"Azriel." the plea escaped her lips before she could contain it, before she even wanted to contain it.

"Yes, darling?" his raspy, lust-filled voice filled her ears.

The shadows pressed more firmly against her, pushing the fabric aside. And they roamed all over her wetness, revolving around her clitoris, probing her entrance.

A gasp escaped from her lips, her hips involuntarily moving forward, the shadows retreated, the touch becoming lighter. Eclipse refrained from groaning. Her hand found Azriel’s still resting on her knee and almost desperately pulled it towards her center, but his hand refused to move past the middle of her thigh.

Azriel smirked.

"Needing, darling?"

Eclipse glared at him, he leaned towards her until he was millimeters from her lips.

"Tell me." he told her, ordered her. "Tell me what you want, and it's yours."

The shadows circled tightly against her clitoris, Eclipse let out a shaky breath.

"I want you."

Those words were enough to make him lose his mind. In one moment they were separated by millimeters, and then his mouth was on her. There was nothing gentle in the way Azriel kissed Eclipse, punishing lips against hers. The shadows probing her entrance dove deeply, and Eclipse whimpered.

Azriel took advantage to slip his tongue into Eclipse's mouth, his hand finding its place on her nape as his tongue explored Eclipse's mouth, swallowing every sound she let out while his shadows, teasing, barely satisfied the desire that made her dizzy, that made her unable to form a rational thought. His tongue took control almost instantaneously, perhaps because Eclipse was too excited to reciprocate the kiss in the same way, or maybe because naturally she submitted to him.

Azriel's hands found their place on her hips, and then lower, until he could lift her and sit her astride his lap. His mouth didn't leave Eclipse's, every time their tongues brushed, Eclipse felt as if she was dizzy and the wetness in her pussy increased. As if Azriel felt it, he drew her closer to him until her center was against his hardness. Eclipse moaned. But then, Eclipse felt everything around her disappear. Everything. And she felt herself in freefall, instinctively placing her hands on Azriel's shoulders, holding on. But a second later, reality reappeared around her again.

The smell of him was all around, Eclipse glanced at her surroundings and quickly realized where they were; Azriel's room. He was sitting in the middle of his bed, his back against the headboard, and she was still in his lap. The smell of him was all around, Eclipse glanced at her surroundings and quickly realized where they were; Azriel's room. He was sitting in the middle of his bed, his back against the headboard, and she was still in his lap.

"You didn't expect to stay in the living room, did you?" Azriel teased, one of his hands finding its place on the nape of her neck as he pulled her back to his lips, and the other on her hips, he guided her forward, and then back, the command was clear: rub against me.

Hesitant, Eclipse moved her hips against him, finding herself needing that delicious friction that made her delirious. Eclipse broke the kiss to breathe, but his lips didn't leave her. They kissed the corner of her mouth, the jaw, all the way down to her neck and stopped there, deciding to take his time adorning her neck. Eclipse rubbed against him again, more needy, less hesitant, managing to elicit a growl from him. His teeth sank into her warm skin in response, her eyebrows arched as she murmured his name like a prayer.

He licked the small mark, his tongue soothing the sting. He kissed and sucked and bit a little more, all the way down. Down to her collarbone. He licked the letters tattooed underneath, and if it was possible, she felt herself harden underneath him.

His hand moved up to the straps of her dress, and he looked at her, asking for permission. Eclipse nodded, granting him permission. More than enough permission for him, and he slowly lowered the straps, freeing her breasts and pausing for a moment. Admiring her.

"You are beautiful." he breathed. "The most beautiful thing I've seen in my life."

Sincerity dripped from his voice, and as if he wanted to prove it, he took a hardened nipple into his mouth, sucking on it.

Eclipse rolled her eyes at the heat her nipple was receiving, her back involuntarily arching. Her hand buried itself in his black hair, feeling his teeth graze her sensitive nipple as his fingers caressed the other, giving it the same attention.

"Azriel." she moaned. The need between her legs was almost painful.

Azriel pulled away, releasing her nipple with a small "pop". The same hungry need from her reflected in his eyes. Azriel dragged Eclipse's mouth back down to savor her once again. Kissing her hungrily.

Eclipse felt pressure against her center again, but it wasn't the shadows this time, but Azriel's fingers. They pushed her panties aside and slid between her folds, spreading her wetness. Eclipse let out a moan against Azriel's lips as the pad of his finger rubbed tight circles on her clitoris, needed after all the teasing of his shadows. Azriel smiled into the kiss, his tongue delving into Eclipse's mouth once more.

Azriel used his other hand, his grip on her hip, to keep her from moving for greater friction.

His fingers traced her entrance, and he inserted two fingers, the gentle touch of before forgotten in a corner of his mind, after craving this all night. Eclipse let out a small tortured sound, the stretch producing a slight sting, and Azriel noticed how incredibly tight she was. He couldn't help the slight furrow in his brow, not when the evidence of the slight pain was as clear on her features as water.

"Eclipse." he called, her eyes fixed on him once more. "When was the last time you did this?"

The question caught her off guard, Eclipse blinked.

When was the last time she had had sex? The answer quickly reached her. Years. It had been years since she had touched anyone in this way, and she hadn't wanted to either.

As if anyone could blame her, with everything she had experienced to get to this point.

Eclipse didn't open her mouth, but she was sure that Azriel could see the clear answer in her eyes. He didn't hesitate, he brushed some strands away from Eclipse's face, his hand cradling her cheek and kissed her again.

He swiftly maneuvered to sit Eclipse on the edge of the bed and position himself in front of her on his knees. Eclipse looked at him with curiosity, expectantly. He just smiled at her, his mouth attacked her neck again and made his way down, leaving marks along the way. Marks that would last until tomorrow.

His scarred hands found the back of her knees and pushed her forward. He didn't bother with foreplay.

He lifted the fabric of her dress until it ended up bunched up around her waist, and took the edge of her black panties and removed them, throwing them somewhere in her room that he really didn’t care about.

He pressed his swollen lips against Eclipse's inner thigh and listened to her pant, taking a slow, torturous path upwards. And just before reaching her needy, soaked sex, his lips found the skin of her other thigh.

"Azriel." Eclipse whimpered, a complaint. His teeth sank softly into the skin in response.

"Patience." was all he said as he pressed kiss after kiss, each one closer to where she needed it most, each slower. He stopped for a second to observe her, his cock throbbing painfully against his pants as he saw her. He raised his gaze to find Eclipse's flushed face looking at him, her lipstick ruined, probably he had the remnants of the red tint on his own lips as well, but he couldn't care less. He just lowered his gaze back to her wet pussy, begging for his attention, and licked his lips before placing each of her thighs over his shoulders and burying himself deeply between her legs. Devouring her as if she were the elixir of life.

His tongue licked between her folds, from her entrance to the apex and back down until his tongue was soaked from her essence and went back up, easily finding her clit and using the tip of his tongue to draw tight circles, her taste intoxicating him, making him eager for more. He sucked the nerve a second later and Eclipse trembled under his expert mouth. His hand rested on her lower abdomen, keeping her in place as his tongue played over her clit. Eclipse let out a moan from the depths of her chest. Her head thrown back, sensations engulfing her, ravishing her.

His tongue felt so, so good against her that her moans were almost whimpers as he devoured her, like a hungry man. She didn't know how much, how much, she had longed for this until she had it. And there wasn’t a part of her that he hadn't licked, nibbled, or sucked. The tension in her lower stomach became more prominent, the knot tighter, her hips moved involuntarily against his face, his hand pushing her down, the grip firm.

"Azriel." she breathed, her face contorted by pleasure as she felt her legs tremble. Barely able to process a rational thought, unable to contain the sounds that came out of her mouth again and again.

Azriel inserted a finger, slowly this time. Her soft walls welcomed it eagerly, urging him to go deeper. He pumped gently and when he was sure she could handle it, he inserted another finger. The rough touch from his scarred hands made her roll her eyes.

Eclipse felt a ghostly touch on her breasts, then circling her nipples. She let out another whimper, feeling like everything was too much and nothing at the same time.

His name came out of her lips frantically, the tension building barely bearable.

"Are you going to come on my face, sweetheart?" Azriel murmured, sending vibrations through her core. He only heard a moan, or a whimper, in response. He caught her nerve between his teeth, a gentle pressure.

"Words, dear. Use your words."

"Y-yes." Eclipse breathed, Azriel curled the fingers he had inside of her, looking for that sweet spot that would make her see stars. Azriel knew he had found it when another moan, one that made his cock ache with how hard it was, came from her lips.

"Then do it, come for me."

His lips found the sensitive bud and sucked it, hard.

Eclipse felt the knot in her stomach tighten until she couldn't take it anymore, her eyes filled with tears as she came, the climax hitting her faster than she would have believed possible. Her legs trembling, waves and waves of pleasure breaking her into a thousand pieces and making her whole again as Azriel continued working on her tender center, more gently, to carry her through her orgasm but not overstimulate her.

A thin layer of sweat rested on Eclipse's skin.

The sounds she let out were the most exciting thing he had ever heard in his life, music to his ears.

"Do you think you can handle another finger, darling?"his hesitant voice filled her ears when she had calmed down, come down from her height. She hummed an affirmation, her breath irregular.

Azriel knew he would need a third finger inside her if he even hoped she could handle it entirely. Although the primitive need to taste her was much greater, the need to bury his tongue deep into her and taste everything she had to give him, he vowed to himself that he would. At another time, he would devote himself to testing her limits, to taste the essence of her climax. But for now, he simply added another finger.

Eclipse felt so full and sensitive, her internal walls inevitably tightened against the three fingers, which expertly curved against that spot.

Azriel ran his tongue gently over the swollen bud, reminding himself that she had just come, stopping himself from being rough against her sensitive clit.

Eclipse whimpered, Azriel's fingers entering and exiting, and the shadows curved over her nipples. Biting gently.

"Azriel." Eclipse begged, composing herself on her elbows. The sight of him, kneeling in front of her, with his mouth working on her pussy, was enough to send her to the edge again.

The only thought in her mind, as her entire world fell apart around her and there was only the devastating pleasure that ruined and repaired her at the same time, was that a long, very long night awaited her.

And perhaps, just perhaps, she wouldn't hate solstices so much from now on.

[hiriajuu-suffering]

Kamala aunty and the Hindu vote

Getting this out of the way, I'm voting for Kamala Harris. Biden really should've dropped out two months ago, and there's no other corporate democrat I would really endorse besides her, and not because of the identity politics. Well, sort of. If the Republican primary taught us anything, is a person of South Asian descent will continue to be the ideological punching bag of the white community.

South Asian men get deleted so hard I can't even find a GIF of Vivek Ramaswamy

How Kamala was treated the past four years by the democratic administration of Biden's was nothing short of egregious. Every impossible problem to solve she was blamed for with no tools address the root cause, and she stayed in there looking dumb like a loyal corporate employee. Now the entire system is banking on the political capital they were sweeping from underneath her to stop a literal convicted felon from retaking power and pardoning himself.

Not to mention the states where votes actually mattered 8 years ago were too sexist to put in a woman in power before, so now we're hoping a woman of color would go over better?

Candace Owens already showed how envious she is of Kamala's biracial swag with some really dumb comments.

Her black half isn't what's the issue is, because she embodies a lot more blackness than Asianness in her disposition to the American psyche. And the precedent for half black Presidents that perfectly fall within the cookie-cutter corporate democrat on policy has already been set.

It's her Asian side that might stoke the xenophobia that caused the whitelash red wave of 2016; y'know, because she's going to be subject to nearly the same misogyny Hilary was.

As an Asian-American, Kamala Harris and Andrew Yang weren't just the two candidates I identified most with, they were the best candidates in that primary, period. But they got dismissed and belittled so immensely because of the need to appeal to milk-toast whiteness. Republicans pander hard to grab minority votes, Democrats just avoid putting any minorities in significant positions influence. Don't believe me? Seen any LBGTQ+ positions in real moving and shaking positions?

The DEI stuff the right is going to criticize the entire scope and sequence of how Kamala became the candidate isn't good or fair, but it's not entirely wrong. Because of just how hollow the Democratic Party treats anyone with the poor affliction of being a minority.

There's a key part of the South Asian diaspora Biden lost exactly that Kamala herself is a part of, which makes things interesting to say the least..

Kamala does have the best policy on Israel of any candidate, but that's not saying much since her policy is essentially Obama-lite.

But that means she might lose her own identity vote on just that considering how abhorrently Islamophobic naturalized Indian-Americans have gotten in their support of Narendra Modi

I don't care how effective the Quadrilateral Security Dialogue has been at curbing Chinese aggression, the Nationalist imagery isn't a good sign for any society, really.

Especially when Muslim civil rights in India have all but evaporated. Nikki Haley wasn't particularly bad on Muslim civil rights compared to other Republicans, even as a half-Indian, she didn't buddy up to Modi (probably because he's done more to encourage gender-based violence in India than stop it), and I expect Kamala to actually get the misogynistic slander from conservative Indians because the hyperpatriarchy only comes when it comes to the opposition.

Being half Brahmin though certainly can't hurt her chances with her Hindu base, right? Well, Hindu men certainly have deeper roots in the red pill movement then we'd like to believe, and the first ones they point the finger towards are Hindu women that didn't choose them. Nikki Haley was polling better but Vivek Ramaswamy ate up her press pretty handily. Everyone sees Asian feminine beauty as valuable, but our misogynistic standards prevent us from seeing that type of ethnic image as leadership-worthy.

At least it's not Gavin Newsom. But that might not be enough for South Asian American males dissatisfied with their lot in life. Trump's message is appealing to us because it feeds into our vanity and takes responsibility off us as to why our sisters are meeting the model minority myth and we aren't. While we're not solely to blame, at least the right has some crazy narrative that explains why life didn't turn out to what was expected of us, even if that narrative twists it in a way that will end up just making us feel more isolated, because the right has the most racist women in the country, bar-none.

Well, women on both sides of the political spectrum are equally pretty racist in their courtship preferences, it's just liberal women will explain things in vague externalities and icks rather than being a sign for public restrooms in pre-1963 America.

In either case, this is a biracial black woman who was never in touch with the struggles of an Asian man, never really having been related to one even though she's an Asian woman. To a lot of Asian men, Trump is just more of what we expect of the lunacy of American politics, versus Kamala might be one of those people who actively makes us feel subhuman by being of the same race but still treating us as less than, like many desi women have been doing since biracial marriages within 1st generation South Asian Americans began getting normalized.

The normative view has to become where femininity isn't inherently more attractive than masculinity, especially so that women aren't just fit to be more educated and start making more, but actually lead society in meaningful ways.

I think if you're an AAPI in any capacity and you're not voting for Kamala Harris, you're missing the point somehow. But we're not the movers and makers of these elections, because we always reside in states that are firmly blue or red (well, at least until 2016 when Georgia did a thing). Kamala Harris's black vote definitely extends further than Biden's, but by less than makes actual sense. Can't do much worse than Biden on the Hispanic vote, but Kamala Harris if anyone is how you do that.

So if there's fundamentally just about how identity works in America, we will have a POTUS 47 in 2025. But we've learned the two decades in America has been anything fair to identity. Heck, as a Muslim teacher of a liberal arts content area in a red state I feel at the time. My supervisors won't make exceptions for me they readily make for anyone else, not that they were requirements to begin with, just because my identity bears the ugliest parts of the model minority myth. I don't look Asian enough to be Asian, and the media makes my ethnic identity look to threatening to be trusted with novel ideas, at least.

That's at least something this candidate and I have in common. Biraciality and Multiethnicity isn't well understood in our discussions of intersectionality in social and political discourse. The only people that try to make sense of it are the ones that actively try to erode the ethnic barriers enclaves self-segregate on. Kamala has had to think about that because it's a fundamental part of her identity.

I'm not voting on identity or identity politics, as the right would claim I will. I'm voting because at least this candidate has the capacity to understand me, because they're not a white, entitled, spoiled brat that tried to overthrow the government when he didn't get his way. Y'know, fundamental stuff like that.

Because I'm still American through-and-through, regardless of what my ethnic background is. What's more American than having a minority prosecutor in a liberal enclave? That's literally one of the top 5 career options every desi child is given when they think about their careers.

So yeah, Kamala2024. Bite me.

[wolfawaycamp]

LauraMax & Rylan go on a double date.

🌦️ I realised, as I was writing this, that this is also sort of an answer to your lauraryan besties who hate each other+maxdylan besties ask. enjoy :)

To both Laura and Ryan's dismay, Dylan and Max got along like a house on fire.

Their boyfriends having other friends was not at all an issue— for Ryan at least, he knew Laura could have a little bit of a possessive streak. No, the issue was this: awkwardly sitting across from each other in a restaurant as Dylan and Max caught up. They weren't being forgotten— Dylan had his hand on his knee, squeezing it intermittently, and Max was definitely holding Laura's hand under the table— but it was just weird. That tension had never really gone away, not completely, even though they'd saved each other’s skins.

They just had nothing in common— nothing concrete, at least.

“Inigo rolled in mud again on a walk, so we had to put him in the bath— well, you know how bathing him goes down. Laur got completely soaked. I have pictures actually, wait,” Max said, and started scrolling through his phone.

Dylan responded, “You sure he wasn't a cat in a past life?”

Max found the pictures and faced his phone towards Dylan and was flicking through them. Ryan was reminded of when his grandparents showed Dylan his baby pictures. “Oh my god,” Dylan laughed, “Is he a waterbender?”

Max pointed his screen at Ryan so he could see and Ryan immediately had to try to hide his amusement; he could feel Laura's death glare on him. In the picture, Laura’s mascara was all over her face, and her hair was drenched and limp. Her face looked defeated, and the dog was a blur of movement. He was sure he was failing at hiding how funny it was, because Laura’s glare intensified.

He was saved by the arrival of the waitress, who asked for drinks, first turning to Dylan.

“Cherry soda?”

She nodded and turned to Ryan. “Uh, orange juice. Please.”

Laura blinked at him. The waitress wanted her order. “...Orange juice, too.”

Honestly, Ryan half-thought Laura was going to order hard liquor to get through this interaction.

Finally, Max’s order was: “Root beer!”

The waitress tapped her pencil against the notepad. “You guys ready to order food?”

“Yeah,” Laura answered for all of them. Ryan quickly decided on ordering the veggie burger. He'd been turned off red meat after that night.

Max ordered spaghetti. Laura ordered… “A veggie burger, thanks.”

It was Ryan's turn to blink at her. What was going on?

“Um. A veggie burger for me. Please.”

Dylan ordered lasagna, probably because his conversation with Max had a detour talking about Garfield at one point, then smiled at Ryan knowingly.

Ryan looked at Laura, and found she was looking at him, trying to figure him out.

They had something in common, he supposed.

[clay-tries-his-best]

! atsv spoilers !

when i sat down in my theatre seat to see atsv im telling you i was being the most autistic fuck you've ever witnessed. you could practically see the sparkles in my eye, dude.

the spot. my godddd he's so silly. the marketing ploy to make him seem like the side villain from the trailers was so fucking smart. I really thought that Miguel was going to be the main villain considering him fighting miles in pracgjcalky every trailer ever and being in the post-credits scene of itsv. and miles dealing with having to be everywhere at once was very realistic and gave me the classic "oh my god this poor boy this is painful to watch". oh and gwen's beginning scene of the drums just gave me the feeling that the movie was going to be fantastic. like, betrayal, amazing visuals, more gwen?? already a wonderful start. also the fact that the spot's whole reason to turn into a major villain is that nobody, not even the person who caused his disfigurement, would take him seriously- like- HUH???? perfect. wonderful. bro just wanted miles to pay attention to him for a little while.

Pavitr and Hobie were also really great additions to the spider team. Despite the fact that Hobie's accent was so thick and deep that I couldn't understand what he was saying a good third of the time, he still managed to work his way into my top 5 characters of the movie. THAT is good character building. At first I thought he was going to be the stereotypical love rival, considering his first mention was miles getting jealous of him and gwen being friends. I was worried that was how the story was actually going to go when he upstaged miles by breaking done the collider force field, but hes actually a really chill and cool guy. pretty sure he even roots for gwen and miles, so that's pretty funny. Pavitr was also super funny with a great character design. " Chai means tea, you're just saying tea tea! " was probably one of my favorite lines / jokes from the whole movie. His world was also very pretty and SUPER detailed. Props to every artist for Mumbatten.

Miguel and Peter B.'s dynamic was really fun to watch as well. This cryptic emo ass mastermind vampire who has watched people die and destroyed a universe next to this middle aged man in a pink fuzzy bathrobe who's oogling over his daughter. also, the line where Miguel said " I've had the right amount of you today " to peter b instead of " I've had enough of you " like the normal saying goes was kinda queer. just saying. but yeah, great villain, and I do want to see him in the final battle against spot, but I eventually don't want him to be the one to beat spot, y'know? If it was to be anyone, it's obviously going to be miles. Whether it's just miles or miles and gwen or miles and the gang gwen assembled at the end of atsv (WHICH HAD SPIDERNOIR YESSS SPIDERNOIR FANS LETS GOOOOOOO I HAD THE STUPIDEST SMILE ON MY FACE WHEN I SAW HIM IM TELLKNG YOU), in the end it's still gotta be miles.

the collider scene with the spot was really cool. spot may be silly, but he's not dumb enough to be " saved " by his archnemesis who only cared about him when he was about to become a transdimensional eldritch horror. boss move. his final form was really pleasing to look at because you can just see the detail that went into it. Looking at some screenshots, I noticed there were a lot of eyes and I'm pretty sure I saw a version of spiderman (original world 1610 peter, possibly?) staring at miles / the audience. despite him not showing up for another hour, hour and a half, I wasn't mad. If a movie can avoid showing the main villain for that long and still have them integrated properly, just, wow. blown away. oh and this part made me even more interested because his beginning ost, spot 1, I think? his random beats and tunes sounded more silly and disorganized and clumsy, like him trying to take the atm. near the end, he got spot 2, which was more shrill and frightening. I'm not musically trained, and I could still tell that it was scarier, and to me, they sounded very similar. To not have too far of a difference between the two and stroke two entirely different chords is just. ugh. wow.

don't even get me started on prowler miles... RAHHH THE CHARACTER AND WORLD DESIGN FOR UNIVERSE 42!!!! it was so beautiful and scary and breathtaking because there is. no. spiderman. when miles's mom didn't know what he was talking about and gwen wasn't really outside, it hit me like a brick in the head. and alternate aaron??? hello??? he made me physically uncomfortable because of how terrifying his face was. i couldnt even tell if he was wearing makeup or he was just that dramatjcally shaded. the turn miles does to see that it was his dad painted on the wall instead of aaron.... GRAHHHHHH

as an aspiring artist, I can say nothing but wow. that movie, the fact that it was 2 HOURS AND 20 MINUTES???? HELLO??? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH WORK THAT MUSTVE TOOK??? unbelievable. and you know that sony felt bad for making us wait on a cliffhanger, so they probably were around 3/4 done with atsv and started working on beyond, so we didn't have to wait as long as we would've if they finished atsv and then started beyond. I'm so glad that those 5 years in the Sony team paid off, because that. was. amazing. my depression is vaporized. im going feral, going wild, going insane. i will not think of anything else until beyond is out. can't wait to see my bbg spot have his villain moment in March 2024!!! <333

[emblazons]

Saw this post and article (not for the first time, but for the first time related to Stranger Things) and started thinking.

Thinking about how M*leven's relationship (at least at the start) is the full embodiment of the "Born Sexy Yesterday" trope in the way that even its existence is a play on the relational and sexual insecurity of nerdy and insecure young men.

Thinking about the way Mike kissing El when she has no idea what romance means is literally this trope watered down because they're younger...and you can't deny its rooted in insecurity either, because even the pitch of the show says that Mike has a lot of insecurities he thinks will be resolved by the presence of a girl.

Thinking about how a lot of people who struggle with social relationships and romantic endeavors for the same reason have projected the same fantasy of "Born Sexy Yesterday" onto Mike and Eleven's romance...even though The Duffers have repeatedly made clear their plan is to subvert the trope by giving El autonomy and independence...and showing us that they don't view women as a means to cure insecurity in men...even in science fiction.

Thinking about how the reason people don't want Mike to be queer or M*leven to break up is because Mike is the one who represents the "gets the girl in spite of his rampant lack of desirability" in science fiction, and Mike not getting the girl means that a show they've projected onto is throwing a mirror in their face and saying "this wasn't right when he did it, and its not right when you do."

Thinking about how the more Eleven gains autonomy--the more she hangs out with Max (which also leads to Mike feeling insecure)--the more their relationship crumbles, because El no longer needs the insecure boy to lead her, or to give her insight into the world....which is core to this relationship trope's survival.

Thinking about the way the only thing Mike says about El is that she's his "superhero," because he never learned to view her as a whole and autonomous person--the exact same way this trope does to its female love interests. About how we know this for a fact, because Mike coming to terms with the fact that the naive girl he tried to use to fill his insecurities no longer exists or needs him is what the entirety of his first digression monologue to Will is based on in the van...including the line that made this explicit, though its been moved to the subtext again in the show itself.

Thinking about media illiterate people who think the "trope subversion" in Stranger Things is El being the one with powers isn't a subversion at all, because science fiction has been doing that shit for half a century by making women entirely out of men's leagues their partners by making them naive to the world...which is why people expected the same from Mike and Eleven after Season 1.

Thinking about why people pointing out that S4 "showing the cards" meant of Mike and El's crumbling relationship, El's full fledged autonomy combined with her now losing (removing the superhero effect even more effectively than her losing her powers did) on top of Mike having feelings for another guy is so angering for people--

--because the characters they thought were filling their toxic trope fantasies were actually turning into something else: a girl with a full independent identity and autonomy...and a boy who learned how to view his partner as an equal...once he realized he was actually in love with another boy.

The only way to deny this is to either be entirely unaware its happening or deny the subtext of this trope being turned upside its head...which is also why they probably hate people talking about subtext, right before screaming "its not that deep."

But I mean. You didn't hear it from me. ☕️

[pastelwitchling]

The Missteps of Bridgerton Season 3

I love Bridgerton, I love Polin, and I enjoyed the first half of the season fine... but as someone who'd started watching Bridgerton only because of Polin, who'd read the book, and who had been looking forward to this particular season from the very beginning, I have to admit that I was a little disappointed by what we got. Not because it wasn't good, but because it wasn't as amazing as it could've been.

And no, I will not be tagging this as 'anti.' I've gone through the anti tag, and it's some very vile bull from people who genuinely hate the show or hate the characters (or hate other fans), and I love them. I just have some criticism of a few choices made.

So. If you can't handle any critique to the show at all, then please don't read the rest of this. Otherwise, grab some tea and a snack because I have quite a few thoughts.

I don't even know where to start.

I think the most frustrating thing for me in the beginning was how many other plotlines they tried to shove into this season. I don't want to sound mean, but I don't care about Will and Alice's business, I don't care about Benedict's boring relationship with another dArInG wOmAn WhO dEfIeS sOcIeTy'S eXpEcTaTiOnS (more on that later), I don't care about Cressida's redemption.

In fact, let's start with her. This was such a bad fucking idea. Not the redemption itself, though I don't know why some storytellers think there are no unlikable people in the world, why every woman especially has to be redeemed and forgiven. Some are just awful, they exist, it happens. It's okay to have scenes of our characters just reacting to these people and navigating kindness and forgiveness in spite of them. But anyway, working on Cressida's redemption in this kind of story doesn't freaking work. Why? Because we've seen this character put Penelope through endless shit already, and her season is not the season to work on her bully's redemption. Because Penelope already lost her best friend to this girl, and trying to redeem her now isolates Penelope even more, because instead of Eloise getting to properly realize how much she's lost in giving up Penelope as a friend, we're getting her genuinely bonding and getting closer to someone else. Most importantly, redeeming Cressida now doesn't fucking work because you have her and Penelope competing for the affections of the same guy.

You can't pit the girl we want to see win and root for against her bully for the affections of a man, and try to make us sympathetic for the bully. Are we not supposed to want Penelope to get him? Are we not supposed to root for Penelope? I get the idea of complex characters and relationships, but for the love of the gods, Penelope has been crapped on over and over and over in this series. I don't know about anybody else, but I got so excited when I saw her with Lord Debling in the promos because I thought, "Finally! We're going to see Penelope actually be pursued and cherished by someone else!" And instead? We have her embarrassing herself in cringey and awkward conversations against the bully we're also supposed to sympathize with? This was the show's chance to finally give Penelope someone who values her, but oh no, we have to show how tough things are for Cressida, so we have to make her actual competition who actually connects to Debling as well. So which is it, writers? Are we supposed to root for Penelope or Cressida? When Penelope wins, which is already unfair because she's had to bust her butt to get this guy so it's always her in pursuit, how are we supposed to be happy for her when Cressida is in the corner all sad?

Don't get me wrong, when Cressida chose not to gossip about Penelope at the ball, I was really touched. But the problem in trying to redeem her is that it works, which then creates a whole other problem when her and our heroine are then competing for the same guy!

Speaking of that guy; Lord Debling. I'm conflicted on him because I like how much he comes to learn about Penelope (arguably more than Colin does, but we'll get into that later), and I like how genuinely kind he is. But I hated seeing Penelope have to embarrass herself in front of him. I hated that we had to watch this girl who already feels like less than everyone else not even properly get this guy's attention for half the time we know him. Why did the writers think that would be fun to watch? I thought a majority of the time with him would be spent with Colin's jealousy, but even in those brief moments when Colin was jealous, it was from a distance, and we knew that in reality, those conversations Penelope was having with Debling were awkward and kind of degrading to her character.

Which brings me to my biggest pet peeve in this whole thing. The changes made to Penelope herself. Look. I'm not a stickler for accurate adaptations, okay? I don't care if the adaptation matches the source material so long as it's entertaining, which is why I enjoy the Percy Jackson movies more than the actual show. How I see it, we get two different, very fun and likable versions of a beloved story. So I didn't come into this season hoping it would be like the book, I just hoped it would be a good time. However...

Something I did appreciate in the book, and in the past two Bridgerton seasons, was Penelope's wisdom. She was hopeful with Colin, but realistic. She knew she would probably never be with him, but she was determined to be happy anyway. Lady Danbury even calls her something along the lines of the cleverest person in the room, and that's why she takes such a liking to her. Penelope is supposed to be clever, witty, amusing, and wise enough to know that even if she may not get everything she wants, she has her best friend and a guide in Lady Danbury and the small joys of being alongside the Bridgertons, and that was enough for her. Colin saw her for that wisdom and wit, saw the love and joy and pride she had in her work, saw that her priorities were the people she loved and the craft she'd perfected, and fell in love with her for it.

Here? She's the butt of every joke, she's a subject of mockery and dismissals, she's someone to be pitied, not appreciated. Yes, she was a wallflower in the book too, but she had at least a few supporting figures who she admired and helped her be happy where she was. I don't care SO much that they switched the scene of him finding out she's Whistledown, so much as the fact that they changed the meaning behind it. Her and Colin honestly spent so little time together because the show was trying to shoehorn in all these other plots, and so when he suddenly decides he's going to stop her marriage, it feels like he just does it because he's horny! In the book, he's impressed with the strong, talented, and passionate woman she is. In the show, I technically know that he wants to be married to his best friend, but the scenes I was most looking forward to with Colin and Penelope properly talking more and getting to really know each other aren't even there, so based off what friendly interaction had he suddenly learned to see her differently?

Finding out she was Whistledown was a shock to him, and it pushed him over the edge of his feelings for her. Not to mention, him finding out she was Whistledown told him so much about her as a person. Really think about it; what does Colin Bridgerton in the show know about Penelope? Nothing! Lord Debling knows more about her interests and what she enjoys better than Colin does! Knowing about Whistledown also gave him access to a secret part of her that no one else was privy to! Taking that away means that when they get married, Penelope knows everything about Colin and his travels and what he enjoys, and he knows next to NOTHING about her! So we spent the season with her being a joke to everyone, her having to compete for a guy and fail for a good long conversation, and then her ending up in a relationship with a guy who never bothered to get to know her? Fun.

In fact, why don't we talk a little more about Colin, too. Um. What the fuck was he writing? I don't care that it's sexual, but him describing Greek beaches and Scottish pubs in the book and interactions he's had with people shows exactly how grown he really is without him even knowing it. In the book, Colin hated being known for nothing but his charm. He even resented it and turned bitter when Penelope brought it up! He wanted to be more than that, he wanted to have a real purpose and be taken seriously and even be perceived more like Anthony. Writing about the landscapes he'd seen on his travels and his interactions showed that he wasn't just travelling to sleep his way through Europe, but that he was actually learning about new cultures and experiencing new worlds and lands. Here? He's just writing smut! In itself, it would be fine, except that he CLEARLY had a problem not having a purpose in his conversation with Anthony and Benedict and when Penelope praised his writing, so he does want the same thing Book Colin does, except... doesn't just writing erotica completely undermine his whole thing of wanting to be known as more than a charming flirt??

Not to mention, Book Colin ends up publishing his travel journals, so how's this version going to do that? You can tell us he's doing it at the end, but it will ring hollow because we all saw what he's been writing, so if they try to divert at the end to Book Colin's ending, it won't make any sense when we've already heard what he's written. In that time period, how the hell is he going to publish that? AND Book Colin ends up giving his stuff to Penelope to read once they're married because he wants her opinion on it! How the hell is that going to work, giving your wife your erotica with other women to test read? I know it could be done, but the charm of the book version is then gone because it feels like you've reduced a cultured man to a rake who just wants to gloat about how many foreign women he'd gotten to sleep with. Doesn't even that then undermine the whole flirty act he put on in the first episode when even Lady Whistledown could tell he was just pretending to be someone he wasn't??

I'm so tired, so I'm going to end this with a few final notes:

Why does arguably the most charming Bridgerton brother, Benedict, always get the most BORING storyline? I hate the woman he's with, there's absolutely nothing original or charming about her, and I am SICK TO DEATH of these so-called "quirky, strong women who don't care what anybody else says because they're edgy like that," it's just so cliched, and I need that archetype to die already. I thought they were going to do something with the fact that she's clearly a lot older than him, but they don't address it at all, so there goes that interesting concept.

Francesca's fickleness was getting on my last nerve, and I was so bored with her storyline until she met that guy. Their relationship is a cute and unique one, but before he shows up, nothing of what she wants is clear. She doesn't mind meeting a guy, but the second someone actually tries speaking to her, she backs off. She wants to talk about music, but when someone tries to speak to her about music, she backs off. I just couldn't get a reading on what she wanted.

I really don't care at all about Will and Alice's business. It's the same storyline every freaking season.

Eloise's whole "It's not nice when Whistledown writes about you, is it?" is very stupid because Lady Whistledown has written plenty about Penelope's family before that point (and in the book, about Penelope herself). You can't have Colin acknowledging that Whistledown outed Marina in the first episode, and then have Eloise forget that Penelope threw her own family name under the bus to protect Colin.

The carriage scene, I'm sorry, was cringey and came a little bit out of nowhere. And I really didn't like that Colin was backing away until, again, Penelope put herself forward. She's always the pursuer, and I'd hoped for something different this season. I also didn't like that she had to be dumped first. Like, yeah, let's really not give her a single break until Colin deems it time to actually do something for her.

That's all I've got that I can think of, at least in terms of negative criticism. I'm sure more will come to me later, but this was the big stuff. And I don't want to hear anything about, "But Rin, the season's not done yet!" Yeah, but half of it is. No matter what happens in the last four episodes, this was how they started. I guess when the cast said it was their most graphic season so far, they meant the most graphic for everyone but the main couple, and isn't that what you wanted to see?