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#which i know that isnt how it works but this is how my mind views it lol
clangenrising · 3 days
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So many thoughts:
"the birth of his eldest kits": he wants more!!! which isnt a bad thing but the way its phrased its like, an expectation not just a want. He WILL have more kits, and that makes me a little nervous for what will happen later on.
Also i know they aren't raising them together but the "his" only is interesting. And backed up by what Mystique says later: "I feel like you made it pretty clear they were your children." The kittens belong to Russetfrond. I'm sure this won't impact them as they grow up at all.
"Be warned though: the kittypet is in a mood" MISS MA'AM. SHE JUST GAVE BIRTH. GIVE HER A MINUTE. And as we see from her interaction with Russetfrond, she's kinda upset they aren't going to stay with her! or have a relationship! (seemingly). I'm sure she's in a mood!!!
Kitten Crash!!!!! That's such a cool in universe name for PPD, do you mind if i yoink it for my own warriors ocs??
"You should probably stay out of the den, at least for a while." While good advice for not upsetting Mystique, and even tho the kittens are to young to remember what happens, I feel this is likely to have some affects on how they view Russet... and an inevitable downfall when Mystique leaves and Russet pressures them to uphold his legacy...
Overall I loved this update. I know writing is good when I'm inspired to go into an english class literary analysis of it 👏👏👏
AAA Love this! 100 RisingBucks for your literary analysis!
Most of this, I don't have much to say about, although I really enjoyed reading all of it. I will say though, you've definitely misread why Mystique is upset in your third paragraph. She doesn't want them to stay with her at all, she definitely doesn't want a relationship with Russetfrond. She's been pretty clear about what she wants.
Also, feel free to use Kitten Crash as a name for PPD in your own works, all of you. If you post them I would love a shout out but it's not required at all. We're all just making art, I'm not gonna try and stop you from using my work as inspiration.
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thedeafprophet · 4 months
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the other thing is like. i know its partially my self esteem and imposter syndrome stuff but i dont always feel like the quality of my art is consistent....and i feel bad at the concept of money being involved and things not being Perfect lmao
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thedevotionaltour · 1 month
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none of this writing has charming soap opera drama appeal i feel like im reading bad wattpad fanfic turned novel drama instead.
#im sorry to be a hater but absolutely nothing has primed me to like remotely any of this. i feel bad not even trying to find some worth#but i cant 😭 i just cant. i do think mike is fun though. some meaning there.#but i've been stuck in silver and bronze land and the last most recent run i reread was w.aid#i mean. i did just read some of so.ule's run. it was alright but i had to read a very select portion so. didnt help to build up with me#sadly. wasnt bad tho. but im like mannnn... i miss the current character voice im used to so i feel so Huh when im reading rn#bc those two matts feel quite different than the ones i am particularly fond of. which is like yes natural character development#but it also just feels So different. this is my own problem though#i have a very particular mix of matt character voice in my brain. silver/ very early bronze + n.ocen.ti + w.aid. this is my matt soup#so im still like. dumb as it sounds Adjusting! also b.en.dis resides in there too but is harder to remember#bc the last time i touched it really was in my freshman year of college.#so it's been a minute and is not quite within that soup but it's an underlying flavor. same w/ ann. though underlying in a different way#bc even tho i read this year it isnt the most Thorough sticking and super distinct to his voice (i have a very broad meaning when i say tha#but it is definitely an informative flavor. but soapy antics and happy matt are highly definitive of my current view#so im like huh. im not quite into grittier writings of matt yet. aside from like. be.nd.is. but i still dont find it the same brand of grit#ok rethinking even though i say it's not in there it is it's very much one of those things you dont realize is like something carrying#a lot of the flavor within the soup but if you took it away it would be mega lacking. ok. there#done with my soup metaphor. anyways. point is Im Still Trying To See How This Matt Works In My Mind#not bc im resistant (to s.oul.e. im highly resistant to z.da.rsk.y) to him. but it's like. it's not quite the best to work with all these#other variations and informative to my viewings. i know i said i was done with soup metaphor but i lied. it's like they arent. terrible. bu#and dont necessarily ruin the soup (im gonna be real and say this only applies to s.oul.e. the other guy is ruining the soup). but dont fit#the flavor profile of it very well. like it kinda works. but it throws it off. just a bit. NOW IM DONE.#static.soundz
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maplesyrupsainz · 6 months
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙do-over | MV1˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: max verstappen x fashion designer!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au, "enemies" (exes) to lovers
warnings: i just be making shit up fr
summary: in which they meet again and rekindle their relationship much to the delight of their fans
a/n: tbh i got no idea how to do enemies to lovers so i went for like a past messy breakup nd rekindle of the relationship now they're older nd more mature or wtvr let me know what u think!!! this was a req but it was super duper vague so i jus pulled this together nd pls fr bare in mind tht im not a max verstappen fan by any stretch lol
request!!!: Enemies to lovers with Max please
fc: maggie lindemann
my masterlist
alternate ending
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, yoursister, and 83,238 others
twitter ->
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messages ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, yourbff, and 927,194 others
yourusername heard you need inspiration
view all 18,293 comments
yourbff my girl forever nd ever ⭐️
liked by yourusername
user1 new fan gained
user2 omg i rmmbr her from when she dated max & now im just rediscovering her she's sooo gorgeous wtaf
user3 i can't believe max fumbled her
user4 my competition for her hand jus tripled
user5 quadrupled more like
user6 max verstappen found dead
user7 cant wait for a new collection
yourusername posted a story
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff, and 318,928 others
ynupdates I LOVE YOU SO MUCH
yourusername i love u 🫀🫀
user8 u are fr the coolest girl in the world
yoursister so proud of you 🥹
yourusername stop it you'll make me emotional 😭
user9 you are so so loved
user10 nothing you could've said would put us off supporting u forever🤟
messages ->
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instagram ->
maxverstappen1
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liked by landonorris, yourusername, and 719,948 others
maxverstappen1 life lately ⏰
view all 15,283 comments
user11 Y/N IN THE LIKES I REPEAT Y/N IN THE LIKES
user12 no freaking way
user13 i need to know what's going on have they spoken since the podcast ?!!
user14 exes to lovers arc incoming🥹
user15 he's so cute
landonorris why is your comment section so full up of drama max
maxverstappen1 i didnt ask for this
user16 max is so tired of us LOL
user17 not sorry
user18 i love drama
user19 max acting dumb like he didnt post this to get her attention
ynupdates
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liked by user17, user3, and 18,294 others
ynupdates y/n y/l/n spotted today outside a cafe with ex beau max verstappen, following the release of a podcast episode on which y/n discussed her feelings on how the relationship played out. the meet up has come after they were seen liking each other's instagram stories & posts, however the discussion they were having reportedly seemed heated and as though they were having a disagreement. rumours/theories of them rekindling their romance were rife but what is the consensus now? we are sending our love to y/n as always!
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user20 omg what is happening
user21 im so surprised she even met with him
user22 he wants her back & she cant deny him bc every girl has a soft spot for their first love
user23 agree but tbh it's probs good tht they argued or wtvr coz she isnt giving in to him she's making sure he fights for her 🤷
user24 some of u guys are delulu af
user25 what i would give to be a fly on the wall in that convo
user26 i hope he's changed or at least fr lets her move on
yourusername
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yourusername never lonely 🖤
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user27 omg first time we've seen y/n with her guitar in ages
user28 the guitar omg
yourbff best girl in the world
yourusername i love u 🫀🫀
yoursister hard at work or hardly working?
yourusername shut up you
danielricciardo you better not be drinking tequila without me!
yourbff we wouldn't dream of it
user29 omg daniel publicly being friends with y/n !!?
user30 something is changing here
user31 there's something in the air 🤔
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, danielricciardo, and 88,294 others
danielricciardo hang tight
yourusername lol thanks??
user32 send locaysh 🤟🤟
user33 we miss u y/n
user34 omgggggg i cant wait for more designs from u
maxverstappen1 posted a story
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liked by danielricciardo, landonorris, and 213,293 others
yourbff MAX WHAT ARE YOU DOING
maxverstappen1 getting coffee what does it look like
yourbff i know you're not taking that to y/n
danielricciardo if y/bff/n msgs u ignore her
maxverstappen1 👍
user35 SOMETHING IS HAPPENING HERE
user36 is this for y/n
user37 this plus y/n's story .... the maths is mathing
user38 No freaking way
yourusername posted a story
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charles_leclerc im on the edge of my seat!!
yourusername 😭 hi charles
yourbff I KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING Y/N U GUYS ARE NOT SLICK
danielricciardo ignore y/bff/n
yourusername done & done
user39 im spinning around
user40 i've connected the dots
twitter ->
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yourbff posted a story
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liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo, and 22,293 others
danielricciardo have you forgiven me yet
yourbff i'll forgive max before i forgive you
maxverstappen1 have you forgiven me?
yourbff what do you think max emilian
yourusername you are not mad at all
yourbff of course not. i always loved max
yourusername 😜
ynupdates posted a story
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user45 oh my god it's real
user46 NO WAY IS SHE BACK IN THE PADDOCK
user47 & she said she couldn't ever be just friends with her first love...
ynupdates NO YOU'RE RIGHT
user48 they are soulmates for real
user49 i can't believe all it took was a podcast episode
yourusername posted a story
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liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo, and 548,293 others
charles_leclerc i will say i am shocked but happy beyond words to have you back!
yourusername ❤️❤️ catch up soon!
danielricciardo she's back for goood
yourusername don't speak too soon
yourbff can i come
yourusername max said only if you forgive him in writing
yourbff 😑
user50 shameless 🥹🥹🥹
user51 YOU GOT THAT GLOW OF A NEW OLD RELATIONSHIP
ynupdates not you trying to pretend you aren't ecstatic
user52 i want whatever max verstappen has
ynupdates posted a story
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liked by maxverstappen1, user44, and 128,103 others
user53 the lol
ynupdates trying to pretend i care about racing😕😕😕
user54 he's down bad for her always has been always will be
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc, and 828,045 others
yourusername weekend off
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user55 they're just friends they're just friends they're just friends
user56 i dont believe it for a second
yourbff get back to work
yourusername im busy right now
yourbff oh i wonder what with
user57 max max max max
user58 she gets prettier everytime i see her
maxverstappen1 so glad to have you back on the paddock y/n ❤️
yourusername glad to be back !
user59 they r so stiff
user60 trying to trick us into thinking they arent in love
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff, and 982,193 others
yourusername all the good in my life
tagged: maxverstappen1, yourbff
view all 21,283 comments
user64 SHE LOOKS SOOO HAPPY
ynupdates her smile😭😭😭
yourbff the way you're glowing
liked by yourusername
maxverstappen1 i love you ❤️
yourusername i love u too 🥹🫶
user65 i'll never recover
user66 the new (old) f1 it couple
user67 best wag of all time
user68 cant wait to buy all of y/n's new collection
user69 literally same it looks soo cool
maxverstappen1
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liked by yourusername, yourbff, and 1,284,083 others
maxverstappen1 i won
tagged: yourusername
view all 34,838 comments
ynupdates omg she is so hot what the hell
maxverstappen1 you're telling me
user70 OH MY GODDD
user71 her in max's car oh myyyy
yourusername wow
yourusername i love u fr
maxverstappen1 ❤️
danielricciardo you're welcome everyone
yourbff you do not get credit for this
danielricciardo have you forgiven me yet
maxverstappen1 and me?
yourbff no never
yourusername tell the truth y/bff/n
yourbff ok fine i was never mad
THE END 🤍
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wickjump · 1 month
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I don’t know why but I just don’t like ink and underverse didn’t really help change my opinion can you tell me some of his good qualities?
i’m going to tell this to you right now if you ever want to get to know ink as a character do not go to underverse. i love it so so much, but underverse is not canon to him at all and isn’t good to get to know ink in the way he actually is in his canon. so instead im going to blab at you for a while
a lot of people tend to fanonize him as ‘emotionless who doesn’t care about anyone and i’m EVIL’ which is also not him at all, and definitely skews peoples' perspective on him. emotionless ink could never be canon, as ink without his vials turns into what comyet described as a 'husk', unable to function or do anything, much less evil apathetic activities.
the concept of emotionless ink can work with individual stories, but the fandom really messes things up with how they portray him. (all art used here is by comyet and either explicitly canon to ink, or dubiously/half-canon)
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literally look at him. that is the face of someone who is not pure evil.
this isn't the fault of the people who write him that way btw, but rather the fandom for being unable to tell the difference between fanon and canon sometimes. anyway, ink appeal:
i, and many other people, enjoy him because the way he acts is very similar to people with autism/adhd. being rude without intending to be so, hyperactive, memory issues, struggles with empathy, social situations, and connection to others, xyz. even little tidbits, like losing his pencils a lot, can be reminiscent of people with poor object permanence often caused by adhd or other disorders (me fr). aaaand, their adhd is actually canon!! he's not intentionally an asshole he's just neurodivergent and cannot read a room for shit!!
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for that reason, he's used for neurodivergent people to project onto him. also because his canon story is unique in a way never seen before, just. ever. he expanded the idea of the multiverse in a way that helped allow other people to build on it. so in a way, we owe a lot of the utmv to ink (or comyet for coming up with the idea of him in the first place). i highly recommend you read the comic! it's on comyet's tumblr page, or dubbed on youtube by a few people.
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also, to those who say he's completely faking his feelings, what do you think his vials are for? he canonically experiences grief and other strong emotions, even if they're not the same way others’ feelings are. booyah stop making him an asshole i beg i just want one piece of content where ink isnt evil im pleading
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^^^^ ink after one of his father figures dies. he tries to cope by saying it's in the script for his au, something ink has sworn himself to protect, despite his grief. he's coping :(
a lot of other people also enjoy ink because of their moral greyness and their priorities being rather interesting. and before you think 'oh thats just underverse': no it is not! ink's priorities are keeping aus on script and protecting them rather than the lives of individual people, however acknowledges them more as people if they're aware of the multiverse (such as his father figures, zephyr and top). otherwise, he views people as characters. ink does not harm people for the sake of harming them, they avoid fighting and would not be abusive or antagonistic for the sake of being an antagonist.
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this is actually what influenced the god headcanon, a headcanon where ink is the god of creativity (often paired with error as the god of destruction), as many people interpret this distanced behavior as similar to gods in many media.
his dynamic with other characters is also really interesting, and how he intertwines in their stories. despite none of it being canon to him, he's used in many other stories and he's moldable to each of them. he's canon to dream, while dream isn't canon to him. same with cross! (ok i lied its not all comyet, this art is by jakei (left) showcasing ink in underverse) mind you, this is not canon to ink, only cross/dream respectively. comyet seems fine with this though, and is friends with jakei, creator of underverse (im unsure about joku). ink is a flexible character!
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the way he impacts stories that, on his part, aren't canon to him is unique and something generally unseen in other fandoms. even though he and error have never canonically met in either of their stories, their dynamic is so multiversal that regardless of the story, or their relationship in it, 99% of the time their tales are intertwined. the idea that two characters have impacted each other so much despite never canonically being aware of each other, much less meeting, is so appealing. comyet actually made non-canon art of them as friends :)
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this is why people who hate errorink for the sole sake of "they hate each other in canon" are incorrect and wrong. comyet also drew ship art of them forever ago which i appreciate so much thank you for the food
ink also has two canon (adoptive) father figures!! i love that for him!! they’re one of very few sanses with two parents. they are the silliest of guys. he's killer but with better morals because he isn't a murderer (its ok i love killer too he can change its all nightmare's fault pls believe me)
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also he's french. imaginez être français. épouvantable. /joke (he is french tho)
also, he's canonically he/they and aroace! this is why you see many more qpr headcanons for him than other characters, though some people interpret him in other ways. though he's not non-binary (referred to as a male by comyet several times, even in the same sentence stating his pronouns), just flexible with pronouns, many people also headcanon him to be non-binary or otherwise trans.
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overall, i think his appeal comes from how unique he is, how the fandom has expanded upon and used him in so many different ways, and generally his relatability to many neurodivergent people, me included. i love u ink sans.
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UGH HES SO COOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! consume more content of them where they aren’t pure evil for one reason or another and you'll grow to like them i prommy. he's been screwed over by the fandom so many times
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silliest-heartaches · 8 months
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Ohh my god DRINKKK!! Dude I love them sooo muchhh. I just love imagining them being head over heels for each other yet constantly denying their feelings, because of how they view themselves, yet still finding comfort and solace with each other. They are so. YES. PERFECT. AUGH.
SHARE MORE ABOUT THEM PLEASE!!!
And I love how you use they/them for Ink and she/her for Dream!!
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GOD YEAH I LIKE THEM SO INCREDIBLY MUCH... tbh the main reason i started liking them was bc i was thinking abt them and how doomed yuri coded they were and. The worms Wormed in from there,,,,
I actually use he/they and she/they for ink and dream respectively but!!!!!! I love all hcs and interpretations of them for REAL. nonbinary people who are gay as fuck for real,, very inherrently queer ship regardless of how u see either of them i think...heart seeing them as t4t transmasc and transfem forever personally though so thats what i see em as hehe,, also in my head theyre both aroacespec (though the specifc kind varies from au to au though i do consistently see ink as ace and dream as demiaro :>>)
Im not sure how long these will be so...hcs under the cut lol
- okay well while in my mind while error is technically the First Entity ink sees that isnt just a normal entity, dream is like their First. Friend. you know. Like when error first saw him he was screaming and crying for the hills bc it was also his first time seeing another outcode so. that reaction BUT with dream she was more filled with gentle confusion... this is a bit after she unstoned in the apple incident but still was new to au hopping and naive to most danger so they became friends!!! Questionably so.
-to elaborate, when they first meet dream is still stuck on the ideals of toxic positivity and pushing through hardship no matter what... i think this is something they eventually grow out of and dream will eventually learn to see the need for balance eventually but one of their first disputes happens when ink is running low on ink and most of whats left are the Negative Emotions within him alongside the especially strong panic that he usually feels when they get like this... dream would try to comfort him and try to say that itll work out in the end no matter what and that they just need to push through and that itll be okay like normal comforting words because dream is an empath and can sense feelings right,,i feel like its comforting in some cases but when things get Really Bad and especially when the main reserves of feelings that ink has are Negative, they heavily override his normal sense of self and i imagine they get a lot more. Snappy.... theres also the additional hc thingy of ink also really overexaggerating his feelings and overplaying them a lot for the sake of trying to feel more intensely (doesnt work, just drains him faster and will never truly feel natural to him...personally think that ink feels a lot of disconnect from his feelings) which could be considerably offputting to dream (though before adding swap to the group she thought it wass normal because she had only seen the fake pretend nice joy of the village influenced by her aura and not Genuine Feelings)
I think eventually through the years they would learn a lot from eachother...like with ink learning to be more naturally charismatic and dream learning to see past toxic positivity and have his perception on emotions change for the better (ie in learning that having different emotions are okay, so long as there is a balance)
id do alot more hcs but tbh what it boils down to is: toxic codependent yuri. intensely up and down relationship where theres an insane amount of love and attachment but also a lack of self from the both of them because they are only able to see themselves as a Thing to the other. Also exes who turned out to be besties. Thry got together and broke up wayyy before blue (they casually tell him stories about it and for the parts that he does know about he is horrified for.) Oh and they share hobbies and do parallel play alot. dream is more music oriented and can play the cello and flute. ink can play the ukelele but hes more familiar with drawing and painting duh. Also they have a garden. they love growing flowers but their favourites are sunflowers. Also have writing sessions together. Also may/may not also have beautiful princess disorder. (The both of them)
im so sorry this is so incoherrent but erm. yeah im very normal abt them (half of this stuff comes from oc projection the other half is like. Mental illness while in the shower tbh)
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ilynpilled · 11 months
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i feel like ive seen too many very odd reads of this whole thing, so i do wanna go through jaime & the brutal murder of rhaegar and elia’s children situation.
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first of all, we know jaime’s main function as a kingsguard at 15: he is a pawn in aerys and tywin’s beef. he is a hostage and a means to rob tywin of an heir
this is what rhaegar tells him too. despite jaime’s guilt, it was not a “i am leaving everything in your hands 💔 you are my most trusted knight” being said to an unseasoned teen, rhaegar isn’t dense, but a: “he is tywin’s son, he is the ideal hostage to keep him under control. a crutch for aerys and his dangerous paranoia (even if just to satiate him, which is why he was kept close, again, people knew that aerys was erratic atp.)” we have the actual conversation. rhaegar is open about this, he isnt really tricking jaime here. they also emphasize that he has to stay near aerys. that is his primary role, not anything else. what rhaegar didn’t take into consideration is that tywin, when it comes down to it, will sack the city anyway (neither did he know what would happen at the trident, and how badly the tides will turn, how it will affect aerys and how he will think he was betrayed by lewyn and dorne, how he will not let elia and the children leave etc), the stakes are too great for house lannister and we know tywin will not pick the losing side. it is already a pretty grim situation for jaime, who had witnessed the brutal executions of a bunch of people at this point, to be left alone in the hands of a mad man as someone who eventually becomes solely responsible for the red keep, while also being functionally a hostage while his father decides to betray the crown, but of course, aerys has a bigger plan to retaliate and therefore jaime also has bigger things to worry about.
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jaime feels guilt and responsibility about the whole thing anyway, and the way it is read in the most bad faith way imaginable is kind of odd to me. the dream is extremely integral. it reveals things to us that jaime pushes down as a narrator. it peels off the layers. first of all, jaime is explicit about ned’s judgement, the kingslayer complex, and the role that played, and his concious expects ned to show up in the dream as well, but it is revealed to be not actually about that. he, and that external source of judgement and scorn, is not the thing that haunts him. we see that it is a deep sense of failure over being unable to triumph over contradictions. he reflects on this after the dream too: “it was not him. it was never him.” and the message is deliberately delivered by the ghosts of the people that embody that initial quixotic view of the world that he had as a boy.
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i have seen people claim that the “light dimming” is meant to indicate jaime lying about not knowing (being aware that tywin can be very brutal and is capable of hurting innocents is different from jaime knowing or suspecting this order). even if that wasnt contradicted in the text (ill get to this), it doesnt seem to work with the dream? the fires also gutter out when he gets condemned for killing the king right after, there is no clear him “lying” consistency here. and even if you go by that interpretation, the flame is unaffected by the claim of “i was with the king”, which would then have to be true (and it is—so again what is jaime meant to do here?) because we know the scaling of maegor’s holdfast was happening simultaneously with aerys being murdered and the wildfire plot being stopped. the main function of this part of the dream is jaime’s light, a “romantic burning out” as george puts it, being destroyed by contradictory oaths and a fundamentally unjust and cynical world. the light being withered is about losing hope & purpose, and failing to keep vows that actually matter. rhaegar’s children, his guilt over them, and the oath they embody (protect the weak, defend the innocent) plague his mind. the “I never thought he’d hurt them” is relevant in a different way. jaime is guilty of being an extension of the lannister regime. he is guilty of enabling it. and this is more relevant to him after this event, in the present. the whole dream operates on three levels: past, present, and future.
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it is why this idea comes up with the tysha situation as well. whether he knew or considered it at the time (and i do not personally think he did, or it was compartmentalized) or not is not whats truly relevant. i think the point that is being emphasized is that tywin and his legacy is something that has to be rejected entirely in the present. he knows by now inarguably. no more “looking without seeing.” this justification does not work anymore. anyway, the point is that his light goes out because of the terror of being confronted with these contradictory oaths and impossible situations where these heavy choices have to be made, with devastating costs. the vows cannot compromise. these are situations and choices that destroy a nonexistent ideal that he had always romanticized in every aspect of his life. it is a culmination of the build up of everything jaime held close to his heart being torn down during those two years serving in the kingsguard. it is about the conflict between ethics and morals: “In some queer way, that had been worse than Lord Chelsted’s screaming. “We are sworn to protect her as well,” Jaime had finally been driven to say. “We are,” Darry allowed, “but not from him.” & “After, Gerold Hightower himself took me aside and said to me, “You swore a vow to guard the king, not to judge him.”
but this situation is intentionally impossible in every aspect. morals and ethics conflict. we have the obvious of what do you do when killing the king breaks the oath you swore to protect him? what if not doing it means breaking the oath to protect the innocent? what if your heroes condemn you despite you telling them the full context of this dilemma and make the fire gutter out permanently? what if being with the king (be it to protect him or kill him to save a city) means you are not there to protect the children from your own father (who you are also sworn to obey)? the moral constructs that this society operates with is nonsense, and it is not confronted by people. can the horrors be fought at all? this is how you have someone described as a “very idealistic young man” by george turn into the amoral bitter cynic we see in the actual series who proceeds to revolve his life around another delusion instead, the only one that remains to him, and loses his own moral code due to how extremely it all conflicts with all code of ethics. it results in a cowardly acceptance of the horrors, his selfishness and faux nihilism, and leads to the enablement and perpetuation of evil.
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there is a reason this whole thing haunts jaime and his narrative, and starts blending together with the starks in adwd (something jaime is directly accountable for), and is a huge factor when it comes to jaime effectively contradicting tywin’s dogma when he goes with brienne. jaime became that “knight” in many ways, he, by his own admission, became the smiling knight, who he later also labels “the mountain of my boyhood.” but he is not anymore, which is why there are notable anti parallels in that chapter.
when it comes to how much jaime knew back then, i think the text is pretty clear:
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1. if jaime knew or suspected that tywin had the massacre of an entire family already in motion the hope of “leaving to make terms” would not really be there. 2. after he is found, crakehall informs him that they secured the city and the castle. jaime points out in retrospect that this was only half true, and that he couldn’t have known about the scaling (and other things) still happening by this point. jaime is under the impression that everything is secured as a result. he orders everyone who yields to be spared. he is also under the impression as per his narration that aegon is still there, safe and alive, and could be a potential king. however, he does become concerned about the possibility of another aerys. there is a reason he climbs the throne here imo. i never read this as “jaime too busy fucking around lol” or “is intentionally letting them die because his blood is in both of them.” again, he orders everyone who yields spared, and is under the impression that the castle is already secured. he even entertains the possibility of tywin being hand to aegon as king (clearly not possible with what is in the middle of happening —and if he even suspects this threat, why is this considered a possibility by him?) until he gets an aerys flashback, and decides against it despite it serving his family. he has a lot of things on his mind right now anyway to figure out tywin’s current strategy when it comes to house lannister (not to mention this is not really how jaime’s brain works, he is not very machiavellian minded) considering he just damned himself by committing one of the most significant oathbreakings in history, and that someone will fill the hole left by the person who had the power to nuke a city, something that jaime has nightmares about nearly 20 years later. and even if he was aware of this threat that he clearly wasn’t, considering the fact that it was happening simultaneously with jaime killing aerys and being found, if he knew and tried to rush over there after killing aerys, judging from the distance, it would have been too late. hence “i was with the king…” in the dream.
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luvrxbunny · 9 months
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hi, im loving your work and i'm not sure if this is like where your at cause it's just regular old eddie but i was wondering if you'd write something like reader and eddie are both really into each other but haven't said anything and she knows how into d&d he is so she makes on of his campaigns into a comic but shes been so busy she unintentionally pulls away and eddies worried she finally "woke up" and realized hes a freak. maybe something like she's from new york banished to her aunts in hawkins aunts cause she has to repeat senior year again and eddie immediately is like wow. but happy ending obviously, maybe some smut if the spirit moves you. i hope this isnt too specific i know your last request was more vague but i had the idea and thought it'd be cute, if your not into it though that's fine i figure it never hurts to ask right 😘
hi! thank you for requesting! there actually isn't smut in this one but if you'd like some you can request a part 2 kinda thing!
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Pairing: Eddie Munson x F!Reader
Summary: Eddie feels you pulling away and assumes the worst.
Warnings: smoking (weed), misunderstandings and emotions (lmk if I forgot anything)
WC: 6.9k
A/N: idfk this might be word vomit- i tried please have mercy
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Eddie was the first friend you made here in Hawkins after being abandoned by your family. The sting of failing your senior year was enough, but the pain of your family being too embarrassed to house you anymore made it even worse. You had to watch all summer as all your other friends packed up for college while you were packing to be sent away. You were forced to go live with your aunt, which wasn’t the worst situation you could’ve ended in. 
She’s nice to you, understanding. She doesn’t believe in traditional schooling, she says it’s ‘no wonder’ that you failed. She claims ‘You’re a special girl with the mind of an artist’ and ‘schools aren’t built for people like you two’. You love her, you just can’t stand some of her habits. 
She lives a very hippie lifestyle. She forces you to walk to school, even on the first day, saying it was good for your mental health but all it did was make you incredibly sweaty for your first day. Although it ended up working out for the best. 
You arrived panting and sweaty from your rush over. She hadn’t told you the night before that you’d be walking so you didn’t wake up early enough. You could not stand being late to first period, not wanting to deal with the entire class watching you find a seat. So you had to haul ass to school. You had planned out an incredibly cute outfit that was now ruffled, mussed, and damp with sweat. You wanted to cry as you sat down in the back left corner of the classroom, getting a nice view of the field beside the school, the trees and flowers that live there. You’re huffing and puffing, your breathing all out of order from you trying to regulate it as students pour in. You watched as the cliques formed themselves, having been established in the previous years. You took out a notebook and buried yourself in it, hoping no one would approach you. 
The other students settled down and the teacher began her orientation. You aren’t listening as she speaks, watching the rain that's pattering gently on the classroom window. She was going on about the syllabus, informing you of the incredibly boring things you’d be learning in her class when he burst through. Opening the door with so much force that it slammed on the wall behind it, he was huffing and puffing, nearly soaked in rain with a bag loosely thrown over his shoulder. The thing about him that stuck with you though, was the blinding, dimpled, smile that was on his face. Despite being drenched, late, and the current center of attention, he had the largest smile you had seen all day. It was so genuine that you were smiling along with him without even realizing it. 
“Mr. Munson. I see you’re in my class again…” She spat the words at him so venomously you expected to see his smile drop, falter at least but it widened instead. 
“I am! Yes. I am! And I’d like to focus more on what that says about my… my determination, rather than what I may lack in this particular subject.” Again? Maybe he’s a repeat like me?
Something about the thought made you feel a bit fond of him. 
“Mhm. That’s nice. Have a seat.” She continued to drone on as he looked around for a seat, his eyes widened at you, seeing you already smiling and staring at him. This snapped you out of your trance and you tried desperately to avoid his gaze, pretending like you hadn’t been watching him since he came in. 
He decided to sit next to you and you guys hit it off instantly, later finding that you had almost every class together. You felt so lucky, he was so, so kind. He spent your first two periods and lunch together. He introduced you to his friends, let you know the special ins and outs of the school, and even offered you a ride when he found out your aunt was leaving you hanging. He told you that you’d have to wait with him after school because apparently, he ran a club called “Hellfire”. 
Honestly, in the period after lunch, without him, you questioned if this was the kind of person you should align yourself with. In the next period, with him, when you walked in the door he waved you over and moved the backpack that was on the desk next to him. “Hey! I saved you a seat.” He had that shining, dimpled, smile again and you decided it didn’t matter what kind of person he was. He was kind to you and that’s what mattered. 
You learned a lot about him and you feel like that’s when you started falling in love with him. 
He told you about his struggles with his family, and why he lived with his uncle. He told you about his childhood and got a little teary-eyed, although he still kept his butterfly-inducing smile. 
He told you about his struggles with this town and warned you that you may be subject to ridicule by befriending him. That was the only time his smile fully dropped, he got this kicked puppy look in his eyes as he lied to you, telling you that ‘he’d understand.’ or that ‘you don’t need to feel bad’. You told him you’re not afraid of some small-town hicks. 
He apologized to you at the end of the class, saying it must’ve been awkward to listen to him blubber about his life all class but you, stars in your eyes and in love, adamantly assured him that you didn’t mind. 
You ended up loving his club, the planning, the theatrics, and the suspense, were unbelievable. You were engaged the whole time, obsessed with how Eddie told his story, and invested in the team and their survival. You told Eddie about how cool you thought it was the whole ride home. By the end of the ride, you were apologizing profusely for how much you had talked about it but he, red in the face and flustered, adamantly assured you that he didn’t mind. 
You guys have been almost inseparable since. It’s been about seven months here at Hawkins now and your little crush has snowballed into a bit of a colossal crush on Eddie. Nowadays, your Hellfire visits are filled with you just watching him. You don’t pay attention to the plot, to how the characters are doing, or anything… just him.
 It’s getting a bit embarrassing in fact, because you’ll have fewer things to say on the ride to your house than you usually do and he’s begun to question it, asking if you thought he needed to work on anything and not believing you when you say that ‘he doesn’t need to change anything’ or that ‘it was so perfect you have no notes.’
A secondary reason you’ve started staring at him more is because you’ve been working on something for him; a way for you to confess how you feel about him in a way that you hope he’d like. You’re completely unsure of how he may feel about you. You’ve noticed a few things… the way he’ll save a seat and always give it to you, no matter who arrived before you, how he seemed to be somewhat softer with you than he is with everyone else, but you chalked it up to hopeful thinking. 
You were trying to make a comic of the first time he invited you to Hellfire. You can remember it almost perfectly and for anything you don’t remember you can just refer to your journal. You’d written all about it after you got home. 
You’ve been spending most of your time in the art room now, trying your absolute best to make it the most professional-looking, homemade comic anyone had ever seen. You think about the smile that Eddie would wear, even if he didn’t reciprocate your feelings, you at least hope he appreciates the art. 
You’ve gathered help from a lot of unsuspecting people. You found out that quite a few girls on the cheerleading team are a great help when it comes to designing the outfits. They’ve started to meet you in the art room at lunch to help with the comic, slightly invested in the plot even though you’ve explained multiple times that it’s technically Eddie’s plot. They’ve also become quite interested in your love life, knowing that it’s for Eddie. They actually root for the two of you, they were all much nicer than you expected them to be. 
You’ve started to miss a few club meetings as well. To be fair though, you aren’t technically part of the club. Eddie explained that since you don’t play you’re technically just a consistent bystander. It had hurt your feelings at first, feeling left out of the group but now it’s just convenient. You don’t have to tell Eddie in advance that you aren’t going and you don’t need to tell him why. You always go to the art room instead to work on your comic. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, the cheerleaders join you after practice to help you work some more. You started to fall behind in school work, not paying attention to anyone or anything in class in favor of working on your comic instead. This little picture book has consumed your entire life for a few weeks. Unbeknownst to you, Eddie was suffering the whole time.
He noticed it when it first started. At lunch one day, instead of eating and engaging in the conversation you kept opening your notebook and doodling little things he couldn’t see. He kept having to get your attention and re-explain everything that was happening whenever he tried to include you in the conversation. Eventually, you just told him, with a soft laugh, that you’re not listening. You giggled and went back to your doodling, not even realizing that what they had been talking about, was the idea of you joining Hellfire officially, even if you don’t play. Your disinterest almost broke Eddie’s heart, it hurt a lot actually but he reasoned with himself. 
Maybe she just doesn’t want all the heat, and bullying that comes with being a part of Hellfire. She’s soft, she just doesn’t want to say that right now, in front of the whole table. She’s so cute… She’ll tell me why, later.
You never did. You never explained to him why you cared so little about being in a club he cared so much about. 
You began to pull away more and more after that. He would plan campaigns with you in mind, creating twists and turns he knows you’d love, imagining the look on your face and the excitement in your voice when you’d tell him about it on the ride home. However, you started telling him you couldn’t make it to Hellfire. You never gave him an explanation and he never asked for one, you guys are just friends… he has no right. 
A little piece of his heart would chip away every time you canceled on him, breaking even more whenever he had to receive pitiful stares from everyone else when they noticed characters in the campaign that were so obviously you-coded. The confused looks from every member whenever they asked where you were, only to be met with a sad shrug, became a bit too much for him. He was still giving you a ride home, you’d arrive at the end of Hellfire with a shy smile on your face for it every day so you had to be staying somewhere at school. He was determined to find you. 
He ended Hellfire early one day and set on his quest to find you. He knows you love to read so the library was the first place he checked, only to find the doors locked. His next stop was the art room, stopping to peep inside the cafeteria on his way over and shaking his head sadly when you weren’t there. At this point, he’s sure that you’re in the art room, but what confuses him is that he can hear girly, popular, giggling coming from the very room that you must be in. He rushes over in a half-sprint, thinking that some girls were picking on you but when he gets to the door he can see you laughing along with them as you doodle on something. 
“I mean he’s… cute..” Chrissy Cunningham says to Eddie’s intense confusion. Who are they talking about..? What is she doing with Chrissy Cunningham? The other cheerleaders burst into a smaller fit of laughter at her words. 
“I think he’s cute!” You say and Eddie’s heart sinks at your words. Who? He waits there for a while but you guys never give specifics. He watches the cheerleaders giggle and tease you about your mystery crush. He only witnesses the way you fiddle with your pencil with the biggest smile he’s seen all day splitting your face. It hurts him to see you so happy over someone else, he watches you as a dark, numb, pain spreads inside his chest before walking away with tears in his eyes. His hands were in his pockets, shoulders hunched defeatedly as he heard you girls cheering behind him.
When you came for your ride he wasn’t in the Hellfire classroom waiting for you, instead, he was leaning on his van smoking. He never smoked around you, not cigs at least. You had explained your many bad memories with men who smoked and how it caused you to just despise the smell, that it even caused you a bit of anxiety before you even knew that he smoked. 
Out of kindness, Eddie just avoided smoking around you all together, but right now he was stressed, hurt, and on the verge of a breakdown and a cigarette was the only thing that could keep him from that. 
He didn’t care too much if you minded, you’d already decided you didn’t want to be around him anymore, choosing to hang out with the cheerleaders instead, letting them coax you over to the dark side from right under his nose. He should’ve held onto you tighter, he should’ve known they’d try and snatch you. You were so beautiful, and you’d be so popular under their watch but they’d also corrupt you, turn you into them, murdering the sweet, caring, and loving girl you were. The thought broke his heart, hence the cigarette in between his fingers when you approached him for your ride.
“Hey, Eddie! I was starting to think you left me!” You say with an adorable giggle that he wishes he could smile at. He blows smoke up into the air, avoiding your face, and puts it out. 
“Yeah. I was actually thinking the exact same thing.” He says with a humorless laugh that shocks you. You’re about to ask him if he’s okay when he gets in and starts the van. You rushed over to your side to get in before he drove off in silence. This is when you’d ask him about Hellfire and he’d give you the outline of what happened, but this time when you ask, he responds with “Same old, same old.”
You never thought you craved his voice as much as you do now. The drive is longer, some strange traffic blocking the way and the silence in the van gets to be too much for you. 
Forget about wrapping. 
“Eddie?” He hums at you, letting you know he heard you but doesn't turn to look at you. His eyes stay on the packed, unmoving road. “I- I made you something.”
His head turns to you so fast you can almost hear it crack. “You made me something?” The shock in his voice is surprising. It’s like he never, ever, had even considered that with all your artistic talent, you’d want to make him something. You have all of his attention now. 
“Yeah…” You reach into your bag and pull it out gently while Eddie gets off the road, pulling into a parking lot. “I- Well, I was going to wrap it but I’ll just give it to you now. I- I hope you like it…”
He’s smiling at you as you rummage through your backpack gently for whatever you have for him. He tried not to get too excited but he couldn’t help himself… 
“I’ll love it, sweetheart.” His heart is swelling at the idea of receiving a gift from you. That means at some point, somewhere you had seen something and thought of him, you thought of him so much that you just had to buy that item and you planned on gift wrapping it for him. 
Maybe it's a goodbye present. Fuck- be cool. 
Eddie tried to shove his thoughts to the back of his head, his heart was pounding as you pulled it out of your bag. It was a little book… A comic book? “Oh! What comic is this?”
He grabs it from your hand to read the cover and sees “The Brave, Bold, and Indomitable, Eddie the Banished VOL. 1” He reads it over again and again, believing that his eyes are playing tricks on him before slowly turning to look at you. You had a sweet, shy, and scared smile on your face as you awaited his reaction. “No fucking way.” His voice is a low, stunned, whisper as your smile spreads and he quickly flips through the little book. 
He opened the first page and felt like he couldn’t breathe, the art inside was breathtaking. “No fucking way.” He examined a character that was definitely him, running his fingers over the pages in awe. 
“Yeah, t-that’s you.” You scoot closer to him and lean over the center console to point him out on the page. “Here’s the rest of the party.” You point out more details to him, explaining why you picked some of the outfits you did, and why you chose certain trees and times of day but Eddie isn’t paying very much attention. He’s not even looking at the book anymore, he’s just watching you. You’re explaining every aspect of the page to him as he inspects every aspect of your face. Until you abruptly stop and he watches embarrassment creep into your features. His eyes flicker back to the page as you take your finger away from where you were pointing and he notices a little person in the corner of the page, almost hidden in the bushes as the party makes their way through a forest. 
“What-” He recognizes it on further analysis. “Is that you?” He asks with a chuckle of disbelief as he pulls the page closer to his eyes, admiring your little character. “Why are you in the bushes, sweetheart?” 
You’re stumbling over your words at the pet name. Eddie has used it twice in this car ride alone and you’re struggling not to lose your mind. “U- Um well… I’m- I’m just a bystander so… so I’m just by-standing.” You end the sentence with a sad giggle and your eyes shift to your fidgeting hands in your lap. Eddie’s smile falters at it and the memory of him inviting you to be more than. 
“Yeah. I mean- not for lack of trying y’know? I guess you’d rather be a cheerleader.” He tried to keep his tone light and jovial as he turned the page, now looking for you in every bush. He’s chuckling at your drawings as you’re overcome with confusion. “Eddie. What are you talking about?”
He doesn't look up from the book. “C’mon, love. We offered you a membership without gameplay and you just-” He takes a deep breath as he feels a small lump form at the base of his throat. “You couldn’t have been less interested.” He’s giving you that humorless laugh again as he flips the page. You’re searching your brain, racking your memories, trying to remember when this happened but coming up blank.
“Eddie, I don’t remember that happening.” He sighs, shuts the book, and shoves it under his thigh before starting the van back up, sad anger bubbling in his chest. 
“Listen, I get it. Y’know, you wanna be popular. I understand the pull, sweetheart. I don’t blame you at all.” You’ve never felt more confused as Eddie pulled out of the parking lot. Your silence makes him nervous, and nerves make his mouth run. 
“I mean… When you got here- poor unsuspecting, you- didn’t believe that the first friend you made was-” He lifts his hands from the wheel for a moment to make air quotes. “The town freak.” He gives you that laugh again.
“I’m honestly surprised that it took you so long to leave us losers for the popular crowd!” His voice is still upbeat, and light, as though he wasn’t breaking your heart and insulting you to your core at the same time. “OH! I- I guess you just needed a ride, right? It’s alright, sweetpea.” He’s so frustrating, that fake smile plastered on his face as he pulls up to your house. 
“Eddie.” Your voice is strained around the ball in your throat but still angry. “I don’t know what you’re talking about and I don’t even like what you’re saying so either explain or just stop talking.” He parks the van on your curb and stares at you silently. You take this as the ‘stop talking’ option. “Okay. Thanks for the ride…” You hop out of his van sadly and turn around. “I- I hope you like your comic, Eddie…” With that, you slam the door closed and rush to your front porch. Eddie waits to watch you enter the house before pulling out of your driveway, trying not to let his guilt override his anger. 
On the whole drive home, Eddie is mulling over everything you said. Your seemingly genuine confusion over the invitation. He thinks over the original scene, you did say you weren’t listening. Eddie thought you meant it in the sense where you knew what the conversation was about but you wanted to stay out of it… but maybe you literally were not listening. Maybe you legitimately did not hear what they had said. 
Eddie pulls into his driveway and opens the comic book, deciding he needs to read it before heading in. He didn’t realize how long he’d end up spending in his van, reading your comic but when he finally looked up from the pages, getting butterflies from your art and how vividly you remember his campaign, the sky was dark. He chuckled to himself and headed inside to get ready for bed. 
Eddie flipped through the comic all night, noticing a pattern within your art. You were on every page that the Hellfire party was on, watching what he assumed was all of them. He was obsessed with your art, especially your character, and was psycho analyzing her when he noticed it. She was staring at his character. On every page the two of you were on, you were staring at him, your line of sight fixed on his character. 
He felt as though he was losing his mind as he frantically flipped through every page. His heart raced as he watched your character watch him. He loved it, whether you did it on purpose or not, it was doing something to him. Heat rushed to his face as he put the book away and calmed himself down. He didn’t want to read too much into it but he couldn’t help the way his heart raced when he approached you about it the next day. 
He wanted to work up to the subject, he wanted to pretend that it hadn’t consumed his every thought since he noticed but instead, he just blurted it out to you the moment he sat down.
“Why are you watching me?” His face goes red after the words shoot out, wishing he had taken more time to craft what he wanted to ask. He watches humored puzzlement bloom over your face as you giggle softly, giving him butterflies in his tummy.
 “Eddie, you just got here. I was gonna say hi…” Your voice is timid, still careful after the little argument yesterday and fear begins to curl in Eddie’s stomach. He forgot he had been an asshole to you yesterday. 
Maybe it’s a coincidence, maybe she was just drawing her “good side”. Why would she be staring at you, Munson? Get a grip, Jesus.  
He tries to play it off. “I- I’m just sayin’ you could’ve waved or something.” He tries to sound upbeat, and cheerful, but he can’t get it to sound genuine. All night he’s been fantasizing about what it would be like if you actually liked him back. How he would give you hugs and kisses no matter where you were. He thought about how in love with you he’d be, it’d be pretty annoying to everyone else but he wouldn’t even care. 
He knows you’d love it too, he’d give you everything he has, everything he had and ever will have. 
He shouldn't have gotten so far ahead of himself. 
He thought about how he would follow you to whatever college you wanted to go to- if you wanted to go. He would get a job nearby and you guys could rent an apartment together. He’d wait until you’ve graduated to ask you to marry him. He’d take you to your favorite spot, with all your favorite things, and propose to you in whatever way you’d want him to. He’d spare no expense on the ring- if that’s something you’d care about. 
He’d start a mechanic shop with Wayne and they’d be so rich that you wouldn't even need to work if you didn’t want to. He thought about your kids, he’d hope that they look like you, they’d get far in the world being as beautiful as you are. He wants them to be like you too, good, sweet, and caring. He spent the night going over your whole lives together, his cheeks sore from how long he’d been smiling. But you don’t like him like that. 
Eddie distantly hears the bell ring, not realizing he’d spent the whole class moping over the fact that you don’t like him. He looks around to see you’ve already left him. You usually wait with him, you like to chat on the way to the next class. Your absence has never felt so painful for him. 
Once he’s gathered his things he heads to the next class where he sees your seat surrounded by cheerleaders, a small smile on your face as they seem to dote on you. He decides he doesn’t need to sit with you today, you have enough people to keep you company. He actively avoids looking at you for the duration of the class, rushing out once the bell rings. 
He rushes to the bathroom, bumping into people and getting insults hurled his way in the process. He gets to his stall, with all his graffiti, and slumps against the wall to the floor. His mind is racing, his chest heaving as he tries to cope with losing you. She’s with them now I guess? But- 
His memories flash back to all the times you guys hung out, just the two of you. He felt as though you were just a better, female version of him. You were an outcast but in the best- or worst- way possible. You were like a gem he had found in this pile of shit town, everyone else had overlooked you, not wanting to wash the shit off to see you shine, but he had. He didn’t care about the shit, he wanted to be there for you in the way no one was there for him when he arrived. 
He thinks he fell in love with you the moment he found out you were also repeating your senior year, not for the third time like him but still. He thought it was cute how embarrassed you were about the fact that you were repeating, he loved the way he was able to help you be more comfortable and help you understand that it’s not your fault.
 He felt like- He thought that he was something special to you, he hoped he was something special to you. He treats you like you’re something special to him because you are- or at least he thought he treated you like that. 
Maybe he didn’t. Maybe he should’ve invited you to play in Hellfire more often, invited you over more, given you more of his lunch when your aunt forgot to give you money, and given you a better discount on his weed. Maybe he should’ve just been less of a freak. 
Tears are gathering in his eyes as he angrily rubs at them, feeling pathetic. Crying over a girl in a bathroom stall. I really am a fucking loser. 
He takes a few deep breaths before getting off the ground, leaving the bathroom, and heading to the cafeteria. He expects to see you at his table, and the butterflies in his stomach come back to life when he imagines the tone you’ll give him when you ask where he’s been like you always do when he’s late. He grabs lunch and sits down… you’re nowhere to be seen. 
“Where’s your better half?” Gareth asks, gaining a laugh from the table. It just hurts Eddie more. He stays silent, pulling out his Walkman and letting music drown out every voice or thought in his head until he sees people getting up to leave. 
“Hey, Ed.” Gareth is the only one who waited for him.
“I’m sorry if I was an ass earlier. I know you like her, I just- I thought you actually did know where she was.” Eddie feels his throat close up and almost rolls his eyes at himself. 
“It’s fine, Gareth. She’s probably off with Chrissy Cunningham.” He says with a gruff, tense voice, ignoring the shock that plasters on Gareth’s face.
“Cunningham? What- How does she even know her?” Eddie shrugs and starts walking to his next class, Gareth following close behind. “She’s like what? Friends with them now? She’s gonna be a cheerleader or something?” Eddie feels his emotions building inside him, like an overfilled balloon and he’s about to pop. 
He stops walking and turns to him. “I don't fucking know, Gareth.” Gareth’s gaze shifts from Eddie immediately. “I don’t know why she’s hanging out with them now. I don’t know why she doesn’t come to Hellfire or why she doesn’t talk to me on the ride to her house anymore. I don’t know!” Eddie is met with silence at the end of his rant. “Oh! I know.” His voice has dropped to a low, condescending, whisper. 
“Maybe she got tired of being one of the freaks, hmm?” He rushes off to his next class and for the first time, he’s grateful that you’re not in it. 
You’re in class and your thoughts could not be further from the material. You’re thinking about Eddie of course. The way he acted in the van yesterday, the way he acted in first period, and even second period. You noticed he came into lunch late and didn’t even speak to anyone when he did come in. He didn’t look at you, talk to you, or anything. It hurt. 
You’re anxious, leg bouncing and chewing on your pen as you watch the clock. You need to see him, ask him what’s wrong. 
Maybe he figured it out. Fear shoots through you. Maybe he figured out that I like him from the comic. I didn’t get to explain much but he’s smart enough to figure it out on his own. Is this his reaction to my liking him? No. It can’t be. Even if he didn’t like me back… I don’t think he’d treat me like this. I think he would let me down gently.  
It’s a nice thought but it just leaves you back where you started. What is wrong with Eddie?
You’re ready to ask him. You got there first and pulled his desk a little closer to yours, hoping to have a full, meaningful conversation with him. He never shows. 
This isn’t alarming to anyone but you, everyone scoffs when the teacher reads out Eddie’s name the second time. There are murmurs of “took him long enough” and “I’m so shocked” hurting you with their lack of care. You wait for attendance to finish before asking to go to the bathroom. You take your bag with you and no one questions it, knowing you as the ‘good girl’, not realizing you’re about to skip class for the first time. 
You roam the school looking for Eddie. You check Hellfire’s room, the band room, even the art room but you can’t find him. You check places he wouldn’t be, the library, the computer lab, and even the abandoned school basement. Your heart is racing as you rush out to the parking lot, hoping at least his van is still here and that’s where you find him. Coughing on what you assume is cigarette smoke by his van.
“Eddie!” You shout his name without thinking and his head whips in your direction, shocked. A smile spreads on his face as you stomp toward him. Despite all the unknowing pain you’ve put him through today, the butterflies in his stomach are still alive for you. 
“Eddie, what the fuck?” His smile falters but quickly returns as he goes to hand you the joint he’s smoking. 
“You’re skipping!? You look like you need this more than I do.” You take the joint and inhale the most smoke you can without burning your lungs, Eddie looks impressed. 
“I do need this more than you.” You speak as you exhale. Eddie is staring at the joint, waiting for you to pass it back but instead, you take another hit. “I need this more than you do because I’m not the one who is stressing you beyond oblivion! What is going on with you?” Eddie’s eyes are on the ground as he kicks the little rocks there. 
“Eddie. You know you can talk to me, right? If anything is going on with Wayne or- or maybe something else? I don’t know I- I just- I can’t figure out why you’re acting so… different.”
He laughs. He fully laughs at you. His hand on his chest, leaning back and roaring his laughter into the air. “I’m acting different?” He snatches the joint from your hand. “I’m the one acting different, sweetheart? Miss ‘So sorry I can’t come to Hellfire today! No! I’m not going to explain!’, you’re telling me that I’m acting different?” He takes a drag 
“You don’t care about my campaigns anymore, you never have time to come over, you never have time for me to come over, and now you- you don’t sit with me at- at lunch anymore?” His voice breaks at the end and he turns away to take a hit before you can see the tears in his eyes. “Don’t tell me that I’m stressing you out.” He scoffs and holds his hand out, passing you the joint. 
It strikes something in you; Eddie still passing the joint back to you even though he’s upset. You take it from him with a small ‘thank you’ and take a hit before responding. “I was- It was the comic Eddie… I was working on the comic. It was harder than it looked I guess. I- I couldn’t get your hair right and-”
Eddie hasn’t reacted, he feels like he’s in shock, like his heart has stopped, he’s having a stroke, something. Your voice sounds far away as he’s buried in his thoughts. 
I’m a dickhead. I’m an asshole. She was doing it for me and I’m- I was yelling at her for it. I’m a fucking asshole. She’s still talking to me so softly too. Fuck. Why isn’t she upset with me? Why isn't she yelling at me? Why aren’t I apologizing? 
“I’m sorry!” His voice is the epitome of pitiful, he didn’t notice the knot that had made home in his throat or the tears that had been sitting on the ducts. Your eyes are wide and you almost drop the joint to hug him, knowing he gets emotional when he’s high. 
“Why are you sorry? You don’t need to be sorry- what’s wrong?” His arms wrap around you, crushing you to his chest as he huffs out breaths into your hair. He’s trying to calm down, trying to not completely break down in front of you but he’s failing so far. 
Fuck- fuck. Stop crying- what the fuck happened to you? Stop blubbering like a bitch- She’s she’s so soft- oh fuck she’s so warm. She’s so fucking sweet. I fucking love her. She’s- She’s so stupid.
“I do ne- need to be sorry what are you talking about?” He pulls away, leaving one hand on your shoulder as he runs his knuckles and the back of his arm along the bottom of his nose. “I was being an asshole- an asshole. When you were just tryna do something nice.” He’s breathing out shuddering breaths as he speaks. 
She’s too sweet to me. She still has her arms around me- such a fucking sweetheart. I love her- I want her, I wanna tell her. 
You don’t know what the fuck is going on. Eddie is a blubbery mess in front of you, holding you close as he tries to calm himself down. He’s gripping your shoulder so hard you feel like he may puncture your skin but you never want him to move it. 
You should be focusing on the fact that he’s crying because he thinks he was mean to you but all you can think about is one thing.
His lips are wet and pink from his tears and his teeth.
You try to ignore it; the urge to kiss him. You try to think about how to comfort him but your arms are still around his waist, it would be so easy to just pull him in…
“Eddie. I don’t mind, I should’ve told you.” You separate from him and he gasps softly. 
“I was actually spending so much time on it for a more selfish reason.” Your heart is racing but not as much as it was the last time you planned to confess. 
How nice he is to you has to mean something, he gives you a ride home every day. That has to mean something. He gives you discounts on weed when you know he makes Gareth pay extra. How upset he is over possibly being mean to you. That has to mean something. The way he’s looking at you right now… That has to mean something. 
“Eddie, I like you.” You shove the words out of your throat, leaving you breathless after they come out. “I- shit.” You looked at him. His face is blank. “I really like you, so much that if you don’t like me back I- I don’t care- We- we can just be friends. We can- I can pretend that this never happened… It’s okay.” You’re a little frantic as you get the words out, nervous at Eddie’s silence. 
You risk a glance at his face and there are tears in his eyes again. “Can I kiss-” He inhales a gasp. “Can I kiss you?” His face is full of wonder like he’s genuinely in disbelief at what’s happening. 
You want to cry. “Yes. Please.” You try not to sound too eager but you’re already taking a step toward him and your hands are reaching for him. 
He’s all over you in an instant, whimpering into your mouth the moment your lips meet. His hands are covering both sides of your face, pulling you into him desperately. He’s twisted you up against his van, his hands moved to your waist to bring you impossibly closer. You pull away with a smile to breathe but Eddie whimpers and leans back into your lips. 
You can’t help the giggle that comes out, breaking the kiss and causing Eddie to whine again. “I thought you wanted to kiss me? Kiss me.” 
“Wait- I’m a-” Eddie pulls back to let you speak, although you can see he wishes he didn’t have to. “Eddie… You like me?” His eyes widen and his face turns red at the question. 
“How is that even a question you’re asking me right now? I- of course, I like you. I can’t believe that you like me.” His voice is gentle as he speaks, tense like he’s waiting for you to change your mind about him. You shake your head with a smile and pull him back in, humming happily as his lips eagerly press into yours. 
You guys left school then, Eddie drives you both to his place and you guys finish the joint on the way. His hand was on your thigh the whole time with that shining, dimpled smile, beaming at the road the entire ride. It was the best ride of your life, it had you thinking about your life with him. 
How much you’d love him. How you’d give him hugs and kisses no matter where you guys were. You thought about how in love you are, it’d be pretty annoying to everyone else but you wouldn’t even care. You know he’d love it too, you’d give you everything you have, had, and ever will have. 
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Thank you so much for reading! and thank you even more for requesting!! Please please please give any feedback you may have! I want it all!
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serpenndragon · 4 months
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cw for horror-esque design art!
Just some concept art of Bad but it's intentionally spooky this time so :P
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+ some fountain pen doodles so It isnt just a text thumbnail O-o
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ignore that he doesnt have his scars or uhm. hair
We need more BadBoyHalo being a scary monster so I am here to deliver 🫡 If you havent seen my other art this is his "true" form and what he's worried about the other members seeing, even though a few already know (like quackity, wilbur, niki, tubbo, ect) and the other's probbaly wouldnt judge him or see him differently other than being a bit surprised.
This is turning into a bit of a species info dump but that's what tumblr is for I guess so !
Some things to know- This strange looking ten foot tall monsterish form is what regular Wither demons normally look like! Ofc they're not always pissed like how I drew here but the unsettlingness can still stick around when theyre not trying to be threatening just because of their large teeth, claws, and well being large LOL Bad, coming from the nether originally got the gist firsthand how the overworld viewed WIther Demons and most people were scared of him, so as a safety measure and for his own anxiety he learned transfiguration magic over the coarse of a few years to create himself a smaller, less thretening form. At first it was hard and painful to maintain his smaller form (which is about 5'6, gets rid of most of his teeth, smaller horns/tail/wings that can't fly and less defined leg joints) but after a while of using it frequently along with getting better with his magic he's able to maintain it prettymuch constantly! Though he does have to revert back for at least 30 minutes a day to avoid health issues and longterm transfiguration detriments. (I had a breif idea that during purgatory he would be forced into his true form to defend himself and/or because he kept his smaller one up in front of everyone for too long) Anyyyways Dapper and most of the other babies know about his real form! He lets them ide on his back sometimes and teaches them how to fly/roar and other silly things. hmm another fun fact, Bad has the demon equivelent of a dad bod, if you notice he shed the spikes on his upper back and neck (which parent demons do so their babies can ride on their backs safely), and gained the barbs on his lower neck (which he can rattle to better communicate and imitate the call of a baby demon, it doenst serve much of a purpose with the baby dragons seeing as they aren't wither demons but they've grown fond of the sound when Bad would make it on accident, and can mimic it <3) AKA with the addition of the dragon babies his body went into dad mode like it had when JR was born, he can't really control it but doesnt really mind and it does kinda help him with them anyways. In addition to the physical changes, he's also beome incredibly protective over them Despite them not being his bloodborn children (this is common for wither demons, since their species is scarce they evolved to get these paternal instincts and hormones when they take a paternal role which was meant for ophaned baby demons but works with other species too, Bad's just like oh okay I have a handful of baby dragons my body thinks is its own now woah okay
Went off on a tangent there LMAO i could talk about him all day anyways hope you like my ideas :D
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just-antithings · 16 days
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When antis go on about "writing fictional problematic ships will ruin the young impressionable minds" i just dont take them seriously.
1. theres a certain assumption that impressionable people will only copy fictional media and that the impressionable person will seek out taboo themes within that fictional media instead of avoiding it.
2. everyone has someone around them that they'll copy, someone that will leave a sort of 'influence' on that persons mind before they even can read, even if its just a passerby with a simple comment. that can stick in someones mind and it can be useless or useful, harmful or helpful. fiction is not the only way for impressionable people to be influenced by bad things
3. i feel like there's this idea that the people around the impressionable person are blank slates who showcase no opinions, no emotions or no physical reaction to anything and does not speak about anything regarding emotions, boundaries, relationships etc so the impressionable person is not able to get even a grasp from whats right or wrong unless it's from the internet
so what im curious about is why do the fandom wank go full force with fanfics / fanart and not touch upon about how irl people can fuck you up with how you view the world or even just share resources on healthy relationships, how to enforce boundaries etc or go after any real people for that matter who promote bad shit like those 'self help gurus' that spread dangerous misinformation and dangerous ideas (like the dating courses that say shit like if a woman says no shes playing hard to get). obviously i dont think they should be harassed but it definitely should be talked about if antis were really so concerned about peoples safety
i personally have the assumption they only value a fictional character over actual children, not only because their reasonings for how fanfic is 'normalising' shit which is fucking stupid but the first thing shouldn't be 'Fiction is at fault' when talking about kids (who are not the most reading inclined demographic and not the target audience for more graphic works that *might* influence them) it should be more 'What are kids being taught or why are they not being taught this' ,
for example why aren't kids being taught how to make sure to place boundaries, why do they not know whats a healthy relationship, why are they not being taught about what is and isnt illegal and are they being taught how to be safe etc.
the biggest part of peoples lives are school, family and friends. not the random ass fanfic authors and fanartists who just like being creative.
sorry its so long, needed this off my chest
.
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luvmyoui · 1 year
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four - why?
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previous masterlist next
gp!myoui mina x fem!reader
warnings: toxic relationship, cursing, infidelity, sexism, pregnancy, teacher x student thing (v brief), mentions of sex, tell me if there's anything else!
word count: 2,313
a/n: PLEASE tell me m if this is going too fast, i feel like it is but i need an opinion frm someone reading it, bcz i have a faint idea but i think im going too fast yk?
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before mina’s birth, due to the ultrasound pictures, mina was thought to be a boy. unlike most intersex girls, there was nothing unusual about her anatomy. when mina was born, she was recognized as a male and grew up being treated as one. mina wasn't always as bad as she grew up to be, in fact it wasn't until she started spending more time with her grandparents that her view on others changed. 
mina’s grandparents were very old fashioned, they had strong beliefs and they tried their best to instill them in mina. due to the time spent with her grandparents mina eventually started acting the way they did and started to believe the same things as them. they believed that women were meant to stay home and take care of the children while her husband provided for her. their beliefs were passed down to mina who was the sole heir of the family, having had no cousins or siblings. 
7th grade, that's around the time where most hit puberty. the same was for mina, when she turned 12 she finally hit puberty, but it didn't go exactly as expected. 
“dad, my chest keeps getting fatter but i'm not fat, it’s like i'm growing boobs!” mina exclaimed to her father, she had never been more confused. what was going on?
the thought of mina being intersex had never crossed her fathers mind before the day this happened. It also could have been just the hormones from mina hitting puberty which was causing her to grow breast tissue. due to the fact that there could be 2 explanations to this mina’s father saw it best to have her tested. It may have just been her hormones, but just to be safe he decided to get her tested. 
when the results came back it was uncovered that mina indeed was intersex. this information came as a shock to everyone in the myoui family, especially mina. 
“does that mean my dick will fall off?! am i gonna become a girl?!” was what mina first said when she was told that she was indeed intersex and she was growing breasts. 
“listen kiddo, your penis isnt gonna fall off. and technically you are a girl, but that won't change anything. you're still you.” mina’s father replied, trying to comfort her. 
due to how many changes mina was going through because of her gender identity her parents decided to move to a new city to allow mina a fresh start. in mina’s new school she presented herself as a female saying that she didn't want to be trans and she would stick to the gender she looked like. 
mina had never experienced something like changing schools, she didn't know anyone there.  people had tried to bully her, tried to insult her. but it had always backfired, mina would never allow any disrespect towards her. especially from someone below her. mina often got into trouble, but her parents always bought their way out of it. 
mina always seemed to be stirring up trouble at school, her parents figured it was because she didn't have anything else to do. due to this thought they put her in boxing, she seemed to like starting fights so maybe boxing would work as an outlet for her anger instead of her classmates. when proposing the idea, mina was ecstatic, she could now learn new ways to beat up the kids in her school.
despite her hard and mean demeanor, mina fairly quickly rose to be the most popular in her school. It had always been like that, mina being the most popular and sought out student by others. being the most popular girl in her school and the prettiest, she had many admirers, majority of them being males. her many male suitors quickly diminished though, when she was caught in the boys locker room comparing sizes with the quarterback. 
ever since that day it was made known to everyone that mina had a dick, and a big one at that. 
mina’s popularity wasn't just among her peers, mina was also quite popular among the teachers. she always turned her work in on time and was constantly participating during class. not only was she an exceptional student, but the money her teachers were gifted during teacher appreciation week made them like her all the more. for this reason whenever mina would get into trouble with other students the teachers would often turn a blind eye or take mina’s side. along with being arguably the most favored student, there were many rumors that she was favored in other ways too. 
“hey mina, you know the new teacher, the hot one?” shawn asked, the quarterback of the football team and mina's best friend. 
“yeah, i have her for history, why?” 
“you’re always talking about how you can pull any girl in the school, so i dare you to fuck her and record it.” shawn said to mina and her eyes widened in shock, this was only their sophomore year. how early did he want her kicked out? 
“fuck, okay. by next month ill get you a video of that bitch sucking my dick.” mina responded, she would never turn down a dare, especially one that included fucking someone. 
and true to her word by the next month she had sent a video into the group chat with all her friends of the said teacher on her knees sucking minas cock. It made sense to them that the teacher would sleep with mina but to let her record it? everyone was baffled at how she did it. In response mina just said that the teacher obviously didn't know she was being recorded. the video for obvious reasons didn't make it out of the group chat but it did cause many unconfirmed rumors amongst the students. 
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although mina was known for fucking around, and never taking anyone seriously, that all changed when she met y/n. y/n was different, her beauty was on another level. The moment mina laid eyes on y/n she knew she was done for. that was the moment her reputation changed from fuckboy to lovergirl. she pursued y/n for months before she was given a chance but even while pursuing y/n there was nothing more that mina would want to do. y/n was it for her, she knew she wanted forever with y/n. 
mina had never acted this way, she would skip out on parties to spend time chasing after y/n. she refused all advances from other girls saying she was taken, it might not have been official but the moment mina saw y/n she was taken. It wasn't like you were a nobody either, everyone knew the y/n l/n you were only second to mina in popularity. mina for some reason had never noticed you, too focused on her own life; she never knew of your existence until she saw you laughing with your friends at a party. 
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dating someone like mina wasn't always the easiest thing, mina had this huge superiority complex. your relationship with her was always you compromising on things. she acted as if she owned you, you weren't allowed to have any male friends, but she was allowed to be friends with anyone. 
mina would never tell you, but she liked the power trip she got whenever she was with you. you were the perfect girlfriend, you never complained, and you always did what she said. mina never wanted to lose you, no matter how it seemed or how she treated you she knew that she’d never find someone like you. 
when you had first told her you were pregnant mina couldn't believe it, it was like a dream. she had always wanted kids, especially with you. You were her girl and you were gonna have her baby. she honestly had no bad intentions, she always loved kids, having a son was always something she wanted.
the day she was told you were pregnant she called her grandparents, they were in japan so she couldn't personally meet them but she wanted their advice. the one person mina respected the most was her grandfather, and now that she was going to have a kid she wanted his advice. her grandfather told her that she should treat her girlfriend exceptionally because she was carrying the next generation. he told her that having a son was the best gift she could be blessed with. 
with her new found advice and information mina tried her hardest to be an amazing girlfriend to y/n. she obviously wouldn’t lie and say she enjoyed staying up at night while y/n cried and vomited but she still loved y/n and her child on the way. sometimes she would question herself and why she was even doing all this, why she was missing out on sleep for this stupid reason. y/n could do this herself, why did she always insist on mina staying up with her. mina never voiced these thoughts but they stayed on her mind.
mina felt so accomplished when she found out that she had in fact gotten y/n pregnant, and not only that, y/n was also going to keep the baby. all of her friends were surprised when she told them and didn't believe that mina had in fact knocked up the y/n l/n. y/n was known for her reputation of being a virgin and never getting intimate with anyone, much less getting pregnant. 
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when the baby was born and the gender was seen to be a girl, mina was incredibly disappointed. she knew that y/n could have another baby but mina knew y/n would never agree to it. she resented y/n, it wasn't the child's fault for being born the way she was, it was y/n’s fault. deep down mina knew that no one was to blame but she could help but need someone to blame. 
maybe that's what led her to seek comfort in the arms of another, y/n’s body wasn't as desirable as it used to be. you had gained weight due to the pregnancy and mina hated that, she would often make comments on your body and weight in hopes that you would change it. the change was taking too long and mina was getting tired of waiting. she had needs and if you couldn't fulfill them she would have to find others to. 
mina tried to tell herself that it was you who made her do this, it was you who forced her into doing this. she left the home when you were sleeping and left to go to a party, ‘this is y/n’s fault, it’s on y/n’ is what she’d repeat to herself. she found someone pretty in no time, and she dragged them up to one of the rooms not letting her lips leave their skin. 
as she fucked the other girl all she could think of was you, the way your eyes squinted as you laughed, the smell of you, the way you said her name. she couldn't do this. mina didn't realize it, but the tears were pouring out of her eyes and onto the back of the girl under her. she never hated herself more, she wanted to throw up. She hadn’t drank anything, but she felt sick to her stomach. she pulled out and pulled up her pants, the other girl was confused and as she went to ask mina what happened mina left. 
she went back to her shared apartment with you and showered, she needed to wash it off, she felt disgusted with herself. how could she have done this, she sat in under the shower crying to herself. she hated herself for what she had done, she never thought of herself as cruel but there was no other word to use for her actions other than cruel. 
her skin was all pruned up by the time she exited the shower, she laid behind you in bed crying quietly into your shoulder. feeling the wetness on your shoulder you slowly stirred awake and turned around to see mina crying. she refused to tell you what upset her but she kept repeating ‘i love you’ and ‘i'm sorry’. you had no idea why she was saying this but you just wrapped your hands around her as she buried her face in your neck. 
after that day mina changed, it was a confusing change, and it led you to believe that mina was now cheating on you. after that day mina started acting more distant. you didn't know what happened but you could smell perfume that wasn't yours on her clothes when you washed them. mina was confused, maybe if mina was a different person she would've found herself wrong and changed. but in the end mina was still mina and she kept the thought that you made her do it in her head. the cheating stopped, but the way she treated you stayed the same. 
the thought that mina was mistreating you never crossed her mind once, you were made to take care of children, to cook, and to clean. her telling you to do this was the bare minimum, in mina’s eyes she treated you amazingly. 
mina never treated you badly, she loved you so much and she would never mistreat a loved one. her wanting to become an idol shouldn't have been a surprise for you and you should have supported her. she was the victim in this situation. maybe she wasn't as present in her child's life as she should've been, but if that really bothered you then it was your fault for not saying anything. 
If mina really hadn't done anything wrong then why did she feel so empty as she boarded the plane to korea only accompanied by your words. 
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a/n: lets ignore that mina never had a boy name and all the other things that don't make sense🤗🤗 also im sorry if this is bad i didn't know what to write😭😭
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taglist: @moon-ellie @lisas-earlobe @cocojy @second-daughter-of-clexa @runassimp send an ask if you wanna be added to the taglist!
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dangopango00 · 4 months
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After Last Night
Waking up with him after a hookup
Pt. 1 | Pt. 2 |
FAT/LBC men x gn reader (William Included for all my Aris out there)
CW: very suggestive, maybe dubcon?? (Mentioned that Lars and reader were both drunk in his)
A/N: waking up with cael is waking up behind bars thats croomf, groomf even 😭😭😭 im jp u dk him since ur childhood here ok this is a safe space
Edit: Alkaid rewrite 🥶🥶
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more utc
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LARS / LUO XIA (罗夏)
- SCENARIO: You’re in a similar or complementary industry to him and he’s had his eye on you a bit, admiring how you present yourself but you never really became too closely acquainted. One crazy night of drinking during a negotiations meeting later and two lonely busy old people get busy (30 isnt old sorry. Uncalled for)
- You wake up first; he is KNOCKED OUT
- He wakes up with the wildest bedhead normally and even moreso today. He’s drooling and sprawled out across the couch with a loose hold on your body (Just his arm slung around you as he sleeps)
- His grip on you tightens if you try to leave the couch but if you’re insistent he’ll just let you go; whine grumbles about it in his sleep
- He has work and he’s very busy so he’ll have to leave soon but he wants to make it up to you because he wasn’t being professional; he makes the effort to at least chat or have breakfast with you before leaving which you don’t mind since you’re busy as well
- He usually doesn’t do hookups since he’s busy, doesn’t want to lead anyone on and knows he’ll get attached too easily so he rlly dk what happened, he was lonely but ayayay this is a mess. He does his absolute best to make things less awkward for you
- This scenario would actually be so wild bc if you wanted to do it again while sober I don’t think he’d say no LOL as soon as you had breakfast/chatted he started to like you even more I think and remembers last night being really great so
- I don’t think he’d initiate it if you did do it again though because he feels really bad about being unprofessional but ever since that night if he ever sees you his eyes are glued to you, your body and all its curves and/or edges; he’s so distracted help him 😭😭
- It’s even worse if he’s pent up, he actually will just. Avoid you if you don’t assure him it’s alright he doesn’t want to be weird and he knows he wont be able to focus so he gets a little nervous around you from then on
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ALKAID / LU CHEN (路辰)
- SCENARIO: You’re his classmate and more importantly, his film dealer. You’ve been selling him film and camera repairs for a pretty good price compared to how high the quality is from a small shop that doesn’t get too much traction because it’s more of an antique shop but you do offer more. He was usually standardly polite and short maybe with an extra question out of curiosity here and there before becoming a regular over time. You eventually started tacking on a few more comments and questions than necessary but not so many that it’s noticeable, chatting him up a bit im class as well until you started actively seeking him out, being curious about him and you two became friends. Since this is an edit I’m gonna say like Ayn, you’re probably already in a situationship by the time you hook up but unlike Ayn you haven’t kissed yet (he’d at least ask you out or vice versa before kissing i think) You were over at his apartment to study and help bathe Sparkle; just generally hang out and after a PAINFUL amount of tension building with playful comments and little touches so much so that you ended up kissing him and one thing lead to another !!
- You wake up first but likely go back to sleep and he wakes up during that time tbh. I feel like his home is cozy as hell not to mention Sparkle climbing up and cuddling with you
- He let you wear his clothes to bed since yours got messy and he noticed that you were shivering, freezing from wearing. Well. Nothing. So he let you borrow something and his entire face is red including his ears an neck, it’s quite a view— both you and him
- He ghosts his thumb over your features, his gentle touch almost unnoticeable as he notes each unique thing about you as if trying to identify different stars in the sky
- You had already cuddled up to him in your sleep and he lays in bed with you in his loose embrace for an absurd amount of time until he decides his heart has had enough and gets up to make you both breakfast, you stirring a bit in your sleep in the process
- He kept trying to find an opportunity to get up before but you clung to him so he couldn’t find it in himself to leave you gn but when he did eventually get up he just kissed the crown of your head and gently pulled your arms off of him, then laying you down
- His bed head is just his normal hair honestly and he doesn’t move too much, just snores a little bit and slightly drools
- He’s embarrassed the rest of the day, his usual charismatic persona failing on him when he needs it most and he’s a bit nervous not knowing if you’d felt the same as him or if it was just lust. Though all that is quickly nipped in the bud when you give him a kiss on the cheek and confess properly, holding his hands in yours
- Deciding he’s wasted enough time being a dork He offers to take you on your first date in a nearby cafe since it was pretty impromptu but he still says it with a helpless smile and slight blush. On this date he def took pictures and has them pinned on his wall; they’ll quickly become some of his most prized photos
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CLARENCE / SI LAN (司岚)
- SCENARIO: You two went to the same high school all four years and maybe even the same middle school at some point but you never really interacted because he was busy with schoolwork and so were you so you really never felt the need to bother him. Little did you know Clarence had the biggest crush on you since you met and after being acquainted through the student council you became friends. Upon growing closer and some worrying about how little he relaxes later and you mayyy have accidentally made out with him a little in the council room after hours 🥺 then took it back to your apartment 🥺🥺 and ended up sleeping together 🥺🥺🥺
- He wakes up first and just stares at the ceiling. how did this happen oh my god. Not in a bad way but oh my GOD. -Clarence
- He’s so embarrassed by last night especially with his own behavior. Just remembering the sounds he made and the words he said has him reeling; he must’ve told you he loved you 100,000 times
- he just stays completely still hoping you’re still asleep and once you wake up he shuts his eyes so fast kind of trying to pretend to be asleep but with how tightly his eyes and lips are shut you know he’s awake
- You give him a little kiss on his eyelids and lips and he knows he’s caught; he blushes but then kind of just lets a small exasperated smile wash over his face; he really doesn’t know what to do
- His bedhead is basically the same as his normal but more messy around the bangs also he snores a tiny bit but thats pretty much it
- He’s pretty happy and normal when he isn’t thinking about the specifics of last night’s events
- He even goes ahead and makes breakfast for you and him as well as his cats (they’re probably the ones who woke yall up lol)
- He doesn’t do hook ups and he’s liked you so long so he reaalllly realllllllllyyyyy hopes you’ll consider getting to know him more and let him take you out on a couple dates because even if his hands are clammy the whole time he’d be so happy
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WILLIAM / CHEN ZIHAN (陈子涵)
- SCENARIO: You two have always been best friends with no question of whether or not your feelings were platonic. Well he had no question. You on the other hand had been crushing on him for a while now but didn’t want to ruin the friendship. That was until college. He started noticing you more and your qualities: how you’ve matured and how you’re there when no one else is, so his feelings have gotten a little bit more than just platonic. He justified it as appreciation and normal friend things all the way up until you two suddenly decided to “test out” what kissing and making out would be like. Platonically of course. Since neither of you had ever been in a serious relationship. The sex part was just testing too, trust 🙏
- You wake up first but that doesn’t stop him from having an existential crisis when he wakes up
- You’re excited although a bit nervous from anticipation honestly since you already knew your feelings were not platonic but you didn’t know what he’d think so instead of worrying you just poke his face and admire him sleeping
- His bedhead is crazy, some of his hair sticks up and he has a pool of drool under him. He snores too— finally getting to release his feelings has him K.Od it was tew good
- You go to make breakfast or shower or something and he’d probably wake up during that time bc he doesn’t feel your warmth anymore
- Like Clarence, Liam wakes up perplexed and embarrassed and he’s worried he may have crossed a line doing what he did last night since you were supposed to be just friends! He’s freaking out so bad! come back he needs reassurance 😭
- When you get back he’s so apologetic and is just so nervous around you until you broach the subject, reassuring him that you don’t mind what happened
- After you sort out your thoughts on what happened and have a loooong talk about it you’re pretty much back to being normal and you even hang out for a bit longer, watching some movies and baking together although he does still blush and fumble his words around you a little
- He’s scared to tell you he would rather be yours than be your fwb (friend with benefits) bc this is his first hookup but considering he’s been your best friend and crush for so long you feel the same way so you end up dating pretty soon after
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storiesofsvu · 2 months
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I don't understand why people are so insistent on pushing Emily's sexuality into being lesbian. Don't get me wrong, I also want Emily to have a girlfriend (though not JJ for me, sorry—I don't understand the urge to pair them together, especially when JJ has been married for 10 years with 2 kids). However, with Tara, for example, I'm all for it. I know the initial plan was for Emily to be a lesbian, but throughout Criminal Minds' 16 years, we've seen Emily love men too. Why couldn't Emily be bisexual? Why do people keep pushing her sexuality into something she might not be? And why do people love to tear apart a marriage for their ship? I'm all for it if JJ isn't married; I shipped them before JJ got pregnant and got serious with Will. But now, in my opinion, Jemily is as bad as Jeid, sorry. I really just want to understand; this isn't a hate ask
Bruh I am on the same page as you.
In early seasons, yeah I ship jemily hardcore, there’s so many little moments that linger and toe the line of platonic relationship. Then the writers/show runners knew what they could tease/bait into getting more views/people to come back week after week & continued to do it. (Aka 200/them hallucinating each other).
And that’s the exact same thing that AJ’s comment in that interview was… bait. Theyve already clairified that Will isnt dying/divorcing, the actor just isnt returning. To do jemily in s17 makes no sense, esp after the health scare in s16 that will came out on the good side of, if theyd killed him off in s16 then maaaaaaaaybe.
Now imo, Temily in s17+ does work. They used s16 to establish tara as queer, and then could easily use that progress of emily either saying that she’s bi or having her start to question her sexuality & bonding with tara over it until they realize feelings.
YES. THANK YOU. And yeah she was supposed to be a lesbian originally but there is no erasing the men she dated in canon, no matter how much people may hate them. (Imma get hate for this but i didnt mind Mendoza…) and THAT likely comes from such biphobia/bi erasure within the lgbt community, which is unfortunate. If emily was to be queer in s17+ she would either be bi, or be a late in life lesbian, realizing that maybe that’s why things never seemed to work out. Honestly, i’d prefer her to be bi. We dont have enough representation on television.
I guess i dont really have an answer, but those are my thoughts 😂😂
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utahlive · 1 year
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im sorry utah nation. I played videos game instead of working on an episode,, orz
on an unrelated note, I wanted to ask: does anyone have any tumblr themes or ways to make posts chronological? We have roughly 150 episodes of UtahLIVE, and although most of them can be read out of order, there is a timeline (plus it would be more convenient for new readers. Ive gotten a lot of asks about topics or scenarios that have already been answered). If there are any tutorials/themes/tips let me know via DMs or ask box!
additionally:
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LETS GOOOOO!!! This is insane! 4000 people... thats roughly twice the size of the student body at my school. I dont know how many of you guys are porn bots, but im still going to take this W. I feel like I should do something special? People usually do community events for milestones I think so if you have ideas let me know?? Otherwise I’ll have something fun to post in the next week.
+ some quick q&a below
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avoiding potential lawsuits 🙏
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I know this one is meant for Wilbur, but alas thats just how I draw eyes. Sorry my art style gave your fave character cataracts. yeah its permanent. no sorry we cant fix it. um. insurance doesnt cover the surgery so hes like that forever. yeah. sorry
(i do like to mess with how I draw eyes, but the white color is a stylistic choice)
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its a psycho-competitive relationship that can be construed to be romantic (but it's not explicit). obviously
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anon im holding your hand so tenderly and lovingly. it means a lot that people like my art! more than I can say, which is why ive been trying to figure out how to answer this ask for the past like... two+ weeks since you sent it in! Im probably gonna hold off on sharing my other accounts for a few reasons (there might be some people who already know my other blogs which is fine idc welcome to my twisted mind etc im just not going to advertise them here). My main blog is basically a spam blog where I dont tag anything. I dont really post original art and my fandom art is few and far between. 90% of my work just goes in discord DMs or servers 💀 I think the main reason though-and this may or may not make sense to some of you-is that I don’t want your opinion of me to change how you view the story. This is a super specific example, but for all my fic readers out there: have you ever joined an authors server, and then after meeting them you feel a bit odd about the fic since the creator isnt exactly the person you thought them to be (not necessarily in a good or bad way)? That’s exactly what I don’t want happening with this blog. Basically: Nooo what if you find out about me as a person and realize im cringeeee aaaaa [image of the werewolf transformation (you know the one)] That being said, we’ll see how things go, I guess! At the very least, I’ll probably put my socials out when I’m done here (we got a ways to go before that happens though, so dont even start to worry about that) that was a lot of text for one answer. yeesh 😬 sorry about that
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sneak-a-cat · 7 months
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fucking. miraculous au where chloe got sent to a damned private school. like that shit fucks you up - speaking from experience - and is where she should have fucking gone like girly is the mayors child why is she there. why. it makes no sense. not saying that children of people of import cannot be sent to public schools but judging by the Everything about Andre and Audrey she shouldn't have ended up in a public school.
like i'm sorry but i truly believe she and some of the other characters should have gone to private schools and then there would be that fucked up rivalry between schools that happens - [redacted] die please. your not better at hockey or rugby than us. your rancid (not really but its funny to get so heated) - and like the friendships people have across schools... fr they are so funny.
bonus points if they go to an all girls school paired with an all boys school. wdym i'm speaking from experience and projecting? of course i am.
but back to the original point. WHY IS SHE THERE. people explain it in fics like her dad was making a public statement being like "wow guys the public school system i fund and help organise is so good i sent my daughter to it" BUT NO ONE WITH HIS MONEY WOULD DO THAT BECAUSE A LOT OF PUBLIC SCHOOLS ARE UNDERFUNDED
like i get that thomas astruc was just wanting to put "bitchy rich girl with powerful parents" in there as a trope but like.. buddy please... think it through.... i know thats asking a lot when talking about this man but pls
miraculous would be ten times funnier if they were all at a private school and were forced to wear uniforms and got weird fucking assemblies about breaking the uniform "individuality is for after school girls!" - quote directly from my old headmistress
like genuinely with fashion as a core theme in miraculous it would be so much funnier if they had to wear uniforms, and on non uniform day - generally charity work, pay to not wear uniform money goes somewhere good, it works well - everyone would go buck wild except for Adrien who in my heart he would escape in a hoodie and joggers
Alix would have the exact same hair and probably more piercings, i'm sorry i don't make the rules every year has at least one person who looks like that and we love them for that (yes she would go to the private school IN THE WIKI IT SAYS SHE LIVES IN THE LOUVRE WHY DOES SHE LIVE THERE THATS A FUCKING MUSEUM)
wait. never mind. Juleka and Alix are dyed hair solidarity girlies for realsies, plus in my head Juleka has fire makeup and nails which are amazing for the goth aestehtic but don't really go with the uniform but She Sticks To It. she is committed
oh and Luka my beloved weirdo who doesn't seem to go to school, yess they would be there Jagged pays child support in droves for Luka which is also used to pay for Juleka to go (they aren't twins to me don't talk to me. Luka is older and they are half siblings ok. )
maybe i'll just fucking write this who knows. idk how the french school system works, never mind the private school one but i damn well could figure it out
plus from my experience, private schools have extensive grounds with just enough upkeep to be fancy but not enough to block the view of the fucking road like so its kind of funny like what were you going for
which could be a banger place for an akuma attack which isnt - yknow - the Eiffel tower. again.
objectively sending a bunch of them to poncy schools would do fuck all, however, its a really funny alternate universe to create... this minor change would fuck up the timeline because i'm in charge and bored
i don't know what this turned into. to be frank with you i think this idea is just actually so fucking funny so i'm going to stick with it who knows where that will take me
also, objectively, this is the funniest continuity error to focus on in miraculous
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hiiragi7 · 6 months
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Hello! We saw your post about wanting to find non anti-endo spaces and misinformation on CDDs and wanted to just ask, what changed your opinion on endos? We ourselves are anti-endo but not aggressively or with malice (we dont even post things or interact with the community really, just lurk, so its not like were ANTI-endo ya know? Just that we dont believe or support them) we just want to understand because we ourselves havnt found any compelling evidence or experience that would point to the existence of DID(plurality) without trauma. This isnt to say we wish to challenge your own belief's at all!! Rather we honestly would like to know your thoughts because we see a decent amount of systems say things like "I use to be anti-endo until I was informed" and so if thats the case I would rather be informed! The only compelling argument ive found at this point is people connecting it to spirituality and while I find that a bit offensive as an ashiest who sees that a bit more like appropriation for the sake of religious belief's I understand its a bit of a gray area for most. Very sorry if this came off at all offensively or if this ask is upsetting or unwarranted in anyway please feel free to disregard if so! Its not our intention to cause issue or upset asking this, thank you for your time.
Hi there,
I've never been anti-endo, so I wouldn't say I really changed my mind regarding endos as much as I would say my understanding of endogenic plurals, traumagenic systems, and CDDs has deepened and shifted over time. When I first began learning more about plurality and DID, I didn't know much about endogenic plurals or how they worked nor how they related to DID, but I decided I would trust people on how they perceive their identity regardless of if I understood it perfectly or not and try to learn more.
Regarding your ask, I feel it is important to distinguish the concept of plurality from that of DID. Plurality is very broad; It simply refers to being more than one, which can take a massive variety of different forms because it relates to how people view the self and identity, which is subjective. It may be altered by spiritual, cultural, or individual beliefs, and in many contexts (especially regarding endogenic plurals) it is better understood through the lens of how both sociocultural and individual beliefs regarding the self interact and develop rather than through the lens of pathology.
The plurality seen in endogenic plurality is not the same per se as what many refer to as plurality in DID, or what I personally prefer to refer to as multiplicity in these discussions for clarifying sake so as to not use the same word with a differing definition.
In DID, the multiplicity has been theorized to reflect a divided personality system, or dissociated parts, which is not the same as the plurality described by endogenic plurals. In practice, however, the lines may appear very blurred, as clinical understanding and pathology also interacts with individual beliefs regarding the self and the state of their multiplicity; as an example, many people with DID strongly reject the framework of parts, and prefer to refer to their system's members as people they share a body with, often because they hold individual beliefs regarding what defines personhood that affects the language which they use to describe their system. As endogenic plurals also often describe their headmates as people they share a body with, the difference may not be immediately clear.
To further complicate matters, individual beliefs regarding the self, one's life, and one's identity may also alter the view of how a person believes their system to have formed even if they are DID. I've met many systems who are DID but who also identify as endogenic for a variety of reasons related to how they make sense of their life and memories as well as their sense of self and identity. To give a more specific example, I've known several DID systems who say they were born plural for a variety of reasons (some psychological, some spiritual) but who additionally experienced childhood trauma which they view as the origin of their DID seperate from the origin of their plurality.
It is my opinion that these differences in beliefs and labels are not inherently harmful nor misinformed because they are based in subjectivity, and they may even be beneficial for many people as it gives them a framework to make sense of themselves in that is unique to their individual experiences.
Regarding evidence and endogenic plurality, I also believe that fixating so much on clinical evidence or proof through studies is to misunderstand fundamentally that plurality and multiplicity both relate to an understanding of self that is not objective and as such cannot be easily measured through objective means. The self is not something that is easily understood solely through the context of clinical study; rather, by only examining the self through this lens, you limit your understanding of the self. Rather than a fixation on an evidence which is not easily obtained nor measured, I instead encourage a frameworks-based understanding of plurality, which is already done for multiplicity (the Theory of Structural Dissociation is a framework).
To summarize, DID is a trauma-based disorder, however the multiplicity described in DID is not necessarily the same as the plurality described by endogenic plurals. As well, while a clinical understanding of DID is incredibly important, it is also meaningful to consider how sociocultural and individual beliefs interact with this understanding and how they may alter the way people identify, especially regarding the aspect of multiplicity and self. Lastly, a frameworks-based approach to endogenic plurality such as plurality through the lens of individual beliefs regarding the self may be more useful to understanding endogenic plurality than a focus on clinical evidence is.
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