i guess i don’t actually know which came first but i do resent the tales from pixie hollow books for not continuing in the same tone and like. vibe. as gail carson levine’s books on the neverland fairies.
[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]
Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?
[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*
–
Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.
Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!
Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.
* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.
Part of what charms and compels me in Jeyne Poole's arc is her reaction to her predicament. All the female POVs in this book are dealing with a lot of gendered violence, and they all deal in different but dignified forms... Jeyne is not a POV character and she is absolutely not dignified lol. She cries and begs, she is utterly helpless. But unlike most women in this book who are utterly helpless, she survives. It's frustrating how fans refuse to celebrate that, simply because there is no glory in it.
Puhpandas had a great idea recently (glitchtrapped Tony.) And I wanted to take a stab at the concept.
More specifically at the "What happens after." bit. Hint- Tony gets lost and ends up back near his old house.
Under a readmore because it could be triggering if you've been physically assaulted before. There's feelings in this that could touch on nerves.
********
He'd traced his steps, along a familiar road. Now he stood on the street, facing his old house. He felt all dazed, and confused.
Why?
Everything hurt- his back, his stomach, his neck, his arms. And something bad had happened to him. His head ached, but not nearly as much as his heart ached.
'... Because it's not my home, it's their home, and I'm wanted no more…'
He couldn't go home. Because it wasn't his home anymore. It was someone else's now. He couldn't remember how to get to his Grandma's from here. He couldn't remember a lot of things.
(He didn't want to remember.)
What had happened? He'd gone to the pizzaplex? Gregory had been there?
Did someone jump me on the way home?
He knew what really happened. But he couldn't believe it- didn't believe it- it hurt too much- He could feel something poking around inside his mind. Something he'd been trying to ignore.
He didn't cry. Or sob. He just hurt.
Get out of my head get out of my head get out of my head-
He was on the swings suddenly, in the park that sat down between their street, and the next street over. He hummed a song absent-mindedly. One of those old songs that Grandma would play on her old record player. A song that his Mom sometimes sang along to.
I'm missing time? Did I got abducted by aliens?
Ellis would laugh with him about it next week, when they'd meet up at school again.
They used to play here a lot, when they were in elementary school together. Pretending the playground was a pirate ship. That the floor was a crocodile infested river- so you'd have to jump from circle to circle, never landing on the soft blue floor. Making the merry-go-round spin so fast, that they both would get thrown off it after a dizzy spell, and collapse to the ground laughing and carrying on-
It just made his heart ache more. His brain pounding against his skull.
He kicked his legs uselessly. He wasn't swinging. Not really. Just sitting. Just trying not to be still. He wasn't going anywhere.
The playground didn't have any lights that stayed on at night. It wasn't that kind of playground, where you'd need to worry about teens going there and doing bad things in the dark. This was a good part of town. Nothing bad could happen here.
The only lights were distant street lamps, and the starlight filtering down.
What time is it?
Tony had a watch. Had a watch- it was missing now. So was his entry pass to the pizzaplex.
Did someone mug me?
He also had a different shirt than he'd worn to school- a Bonnie longsleeve? Hadn't they stopped selling these? Where did he get it?
Did someone… reverse mug me??
The sun was starting to rise in the distance. He could understand why they'd given him a new shirt- his old one. That had... gotten stained, hadn't it?
How long have I been here?
His arms and belly felt weird. He lifted his shirt and sleeves to look at them. Well... He wasn't gonna stain his new shirt, at least. He stopped looking- it just made him feel queasy.
Lights were coming on in the houses, one by one. He could see a light on over at Ellis's house, through the back yard.
He could go there. And they could have breakfast together. They could pretend they'd had a sleepover together, like old times. Ellis could loan him a sleeping bag. A watch. A new head. And nothing bad would have happened to him and there would be nothing weird poking around in his head and his heart would stop aching and-
And Ellis's Mom was there. Standing in front of him.
How long has she been there?
He started a little, nearly falling backwards before clutching the chains tighter.
"Tony- It's okay. It's Olivia, do you remember me?" She had her hands in front of her, in a way that should probably have been calming.
He caught his breath, and felt panic start to ease out of him. He nodded. And she seemed to relax a little, too.
"Oh, good. Sweetie- listen. I've rang your Mom. She's on her way now. And so are the police. Okay?" She looked at him intently, and kneeled down in front of him. While he kicked his legs and stared off into the distant sky. The stars were going out.
"Tony? Did you hear me?"
"Um. Yes. Sorry Mrs Martinez."
He couldn't look at her. This is so embarrassing. Having to be picked up by his Mom like this. Had he and Ellis broken another vase trying to play skip rope indoors? That was a silly thing to do, Tony. You know better-
He could feel her eyes looking through him.
"Do you… want to talk about it, sweetie?"
He shook his head frantically, and choked out "No- no- no-"
"Hey, sweetie. It's okay. You're okay now. Everyone was so worried about you…"
Why?
She looked at him so pitifully. Had he said that out loud?
A car pulled up, on his old street. A familiar car. Mom's car.
And she was there. So quick, he'd barely seen her race up to him. He thought she'd grab him, and swing him around in a spinney-hug. She used to do that, when he was little.
Instead she stopped next to Mrs Martinez. It looked like she'd been crying earlier. She was still crying.
His head kept hurting. Pounding in a rhythm now. He couldn't take it much longer-
She couldn't get any words out. Mouth gaping open like a fish's would. But he could get the message- What happened to you?
He went to answer, but felt… sleepy. Really sleepy. He was gonna fall off this swing any second-
But he didn't fall. Instead he heard his voice talking to his Mom. It sounded strange to him. Like he was listening underwater…
"Mom, I… I lost track of time at the pizzaplex. It got dark, and someone h-hurt me when I was walking home… please don't be mad…"
He went to sleep as Mom pulled his imposter into a hug.
Ein wunderliche und erschröckliche Hystori von einem großen Wüttrich genant Dracole wayda Der do so ganz unkristenliche marrter hat angelegt die mensche, als mit spissen als auch die leut zu Tod geslyffen
A wondrous and frightening story about a great berserk called Dracula the voivode who inflicted such unchristian tortures such as with stakes and also dragged people to death
I cannot imagine being a Damian stan right now. You've got both Zdarsky's bullshit (where he clearly doesn't give a shit about your boy) and The Boy Wonder (where Juni Ba clearly gives so many shits about your boy) coming out on the same day. The whiplash must be insane. I hope y'all get some nice warm soup for your efforts jfc
I know this is a very unoriginal observation (much like any other), but I'm finally reading The Great Gatsby, and even I wouldn't describe men the way Nick does.
actually. the specific phrasing that boy Kevin wants to kill older Kevin with "I must disassemble him, piece by piece, so that everything inside of the Old Kevin comes out. Only then can the New Kevin truly begin." is so incredibly the idea that to heal from trauma and "improve" you have to destroy every "wrong" part of yourself, that everything "tainted" by it has to somehow be replaced by something untouched (which isn't possible)
Fit: Is there anything you want to apologize for, Pac? Like, oh, I dunno... maybe trying to murder me?
Pac: To be honest with you, Fit– Ok, to be honest with you: wasn't my fault, I tried like my best to protect you, I didn't even like hit you! And I told the guys to not kill you like, a dozen- a million times, and I stood by your body, I cried by your body, and I even made you a coffin. Wasn't me, Fit. I made a promise with you, and I kept that promise!
Yesterday's long-awaited Hideduo reconciliation.
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
Pac: Hi!
Tubbo: Hi, Pac!
Fit: Oh, look who it is!
Pac: Hello, FitMC, hello Tubbo the player!
Tubbo: –apparently no one, cannot hear him.
Pac: Hi, guys. What's happening? Why– [leans into his mic] Why everyone is blue? Why everyone is Blue?
Fit: Is there anything you want to apologize for, Pac? Like, oh, I dunno... maybe trying to murder me?
Pac: [Makes strange noises into the mic] Wasn't me! Wasn't me– like, to be honest with you, Fit– [Laughs] Tubbo just left, leave us. Ok, to be honest with you: wasn't my fault, I tried like my best to protect you, I didn't even like hit you! And I told the guys to not kill you like, a dozen- a million times, and I stood by your body, I cried by your body, and I even made you a coffin. Wasn't me, Fit. I made a promise with you, and I kept that promise!
Fit: Ok, ok...
Pac: You can blame everything on Tubbo, he's the one to be blamed on. I'm sorry, Tubbo.
Tubbo: [Laughs] To be fair– nah, that's fair, I– we had to kill you. It was a hit. We had to kill you.
Fit: No, it's–
Pac: Wait, I can't hear Tubbo. Oh, he's muted.
Tubbo: You have me muted. I had you muted as well, it's all right. [Laughs] We had each other muted.
Pac: Hi king!
Tubbo: Hi, how are you, Pac? Morning crew! Morning crew!
Pac: Yeah, morning crew!
Tubbo: We're so back!
Pac: We are so back, yeah! But like– it wasn't me– [stammers] Why were you are on Blue team, Fit? What happened? [Gasps] What happened?
Tubbo: Oh, a lot has happened.
Fit: Oh, yeah, but it's– Pac. I accept your apology, for trying to murder me. I accept it, I accept it. I accept your–
Pac: I didn't try–
Tubbo: He literally didn't hit you once!
Fit: [Laughing]
Pac: I didn't– I stood by your body! Man, I cried on your body!
Fit: Is that true?
Pac: It was true. Yeah, I can send you some- some like, some video tapes–
Fit: No, I believe you, I believe you, I believe you.
Tubbo: [Incredulous] "I can send you video tapes." That's crazy.
Pac: Not that I– not that I– I didn't record your dead body! No, that was weird.
Fit: Oh, that– I– thank you, thank you.
Pac: Ok, I was losing it, sorry.
Tubbo: He was just saving it for later, when he wanted to feel sad again.
Pac: Yeah, you know– not saving– yeah, saving for later to show you that– [stumbles over his words] –you know? I stand by your side. Ok, ok, I'm sorry Fit.
Fit: No, no, I believe you, Pac. I believe you, I believe you.
Tubbo: And they were roommates!
Fit: Enough, Tubbo! Just– shut your fcking mouth, Tubbo! We're just having a conversation here. We're having a conversation here!
Tubbo: I literally– I literally didn't even say anything, I literally didn't even say anything. That is crazy that you think I said something just then.