#which is not to say i was not as thorough as possible but. deserves a note .

[wutaijiemei]

後世人再會......

[qiu-yan]

I think if MDZS was truly about moral good, then Cultivation Society would have been fundamentally changed and everyone who tried to change it wouldn’t be dead. The fact that XXC and SL wanted to change cultivation sects from being dynastic to more merit based and they got such horrible fates is tragic. JGY wanted to use his power to help the more common folk, but he was struck down and any good he’s done is going to be tainted. WWX and LWJ choose to walk away rather than do anything in the novel, so I’m not sure if their actions can be considered a net positive. There’s only so much good they can do as wandering cultivators, there needs to be some kind of structure to help the community but most sects are unwilling to put in a lot of effort if it doesn’t benefit them specifically. There was no social change in MDZS.

thank you for the message! and sorry it took me five million years to get to it...

from a utilitarian point of view, i think you're completely correct: the one individual the novel holds up as the most righteous out of everyone has a far greater negative than positive impact on the world at large; society and the plight of the common folk are in a worse state at the end of the novel than they are at the beginning. postcanon, no matter how much individual nighthunting wei wuxian and lan wangji do, the life of your average commoner is probably going to get more dangerous. you are correct that there was in fact no social change in MDZS. shit did not change on a major scale.

two comments about this: first, the moral framework employed by MDZS is decidedly non-utilitarian. second, as you said, MDZS is not About Moral Good.

first, the moral framework employed by MDZS is not utilitarian at all. wei wuxian and lan wangji are not "righteous" in the way that someone who pulls the lever in the trolley problem can be called "righteous" via utilitarian reasoning; rather, wei wuxian and lan wangji are "righteous" in the way that someone who walks away from omelas is righteous. from a utilitarian perspective, walking away from omelas doesn't accomplish shit because the child is still suffering and one person's absence is not going to change that. from a non-utilitarian perspective, though, walking away from omelas isn't about bringing about a certain result but rather is about living in accordance to your own ideals and code of honor. it's not about helping as many people as possible or about bringing about the best possible outcome, but rather about living your own life without any regrets.

this isn't a philosophy i (a utilitarian) really buy into, but many people do find it persuasive. and though there are still some logical holes induced by protagonist-centered-morality, i do think that MDZS is overall thematically cohesive if analyzed through this non-utilitarian lens. unfortunately, one side-effect of this lens (as well as the general non-utilitarian sorts of philosophies this lens is based in) is that the story ends up somewhat handwaving actual negative consequences.

second, MDZS is not Purely About Moral Good. it has an internally consistent moral framework and it has a lot to say about what it thinks is righteousness, but it isn't a "ringing endorsement of the Correct Course Of Action" book in the same way many other works of fiction are. MDZS is about a certain kind of righteousness, but it's also a cynical condemnation of society, a remark upon the role and unreliability of rumors and hearsay, a subversion of typical xianxia/wuxia genre tropes, an interpersonal tragedy of love and duty and sacrifice and hubris, and a thorough rejection of the just world fallacy. it's also a romance.

i say that MDZS is also a social critique and a rejection of the just world fallacy because, in my view, we aren't meant to read characters like jin guangyao as "unambiguously evil characters who got what they deserved." i do think we're meant to see the way in which society turns on jin guangyao, the way in which that parallels wei wuxian's unfair downfall, and the way in which the genuine good jin guangyao did for the world is now at risk, as a tragedy. as a rather depressing insight upon the morally bankrupt nature of society. MXTX wrote it that way on purpose. you're not meant to read jin guangyao's downfall and go "he got what he deserved;" rather, you're meant to look at the black-and-white, hypocritical, and classist way in which society turns upon jin guangyao as a criticism of that society - one that builds off of the social criticism baked into wei wuxian's character arc.

there is no structural change in MDZS because MDZS is a criticism of society, not a story about how society got better. MDZS posits that this polite society is classist and morally bankrupt, and then does not fix said society. MDZS says "this polite society was hypocritical and self-serving then, and it still is now." in that sense, then, the ending is deliberately rather tragic.

in that sense, then, wei wuxian stepping away from the cultivation world does also feel like him giving up on society. which, from an interpersonal perspective, is fair: he already set himself on fire and literally died trying to do the right thing, so i don't think we can really begrudge him for not wanting to risk it a second time. maybe this time someone else can try to fix things (and die in the process). also, given his and lan wangji's absolute lack of any political ability, it's probably also for the best that they not try to involve themselves in politics to better the world, because realistically they'd probably just make a bunch of enemies and solve zero of the problems.

MDZS tries to give us some hope for the future of its fictional society: both the novel and the fandom (including me myself) posit that said hope for the future lies in the juniors, by whom wei wuxian's generation tried to better than their parents did for them. jin ling's generation certainly seems kinder than wei wuxian's generation. i think we're meant to conclude that things aren't completely hopeless because jin ling's generation, kinder and nobler than the previous one, will try to fix things.

but personally, i'm not sure how i feel about placing the hopes of social reform on the specific personalities of citizens and leaders, rather than the structures those people exist in. instead, i'm reminded me of what i wrote a few months ago about the granularity of morality in MDZS being the entire individual and not the action, by which i mean that MDZS seems to assess and conclude entire characters as "good people" or "bad people" or "complicated and morally grey people," rather than analyze the morality of specific actions. and i think it's because MDZS treats the unit measurements of morality as people rather than actions or policies, that MDZS is ultimately able to posit that the future will be better because a specific group of individuals from the next generation have kinder personalities - even though there was no structural reform. as if the state of a society is determined purely by the personalities of a select group of future leaders within it, rather than the laws and institutions that bind it and the material conditions its populations live in. to put it in other words, this is peak "we replaced the evil king with a Wise And Just king (and made no other changes), so we've saved the day!!!" thinking.

.

i feel like i rambled a lot in this response, so i apologize for its relative lack of cohesion. i hope i haven't misinterpreted your points and that i've continued the conversation in a relevant manner.

[prismuffin]

I feel like Tim Drake doesn't get the love he deserves, So could you possibly do a Tim Drake x affectionate Male Reader?

Tim hasn't really got a lot of positive attention while growing up, so I like he would get absolutely flustered when the Reader treats him gently. Like never yelling at him mean he gets angry. As well as treating him like he's made of glass, while patching him up after a mission. Or staying up with him all night so he isn't too lonely while doing research.

Summary: Reader is a sweetheart and the reader's kindness makes Tim fall head over heels.

Bonus points: Reader likes to stay up with Tim, because Reader suffers from night terrors. So when Tim asks about it, reader tells him, he's comforting to be around.

A/n: ofc i can do that for you! I hope you enjoy it thanks for being thorough and even including a summary!!

Loverboy

Tim Drake x affectionate!male!reader

( summary: Reader is a sweetheart who's kindness causes Tim to fall head over heels. )

Warnings?: breaking of glass, Tim being all sappy, tooth rotting fluff, mentions of injuries but no details

!-!more under the cut!-!

He doesn’t know what he did to deserve an amazing boyfriend like you.

That’s what Tim thinks as he watched you pick up the glass of your favorite snow-globe off the ground. His stress has made him very clumsy lately and he hadn’t realized it moved from its usual spot on the desk and so when he turned with a clipboard full of calculations and heard something shatter his heart dropped when he realized what it was, your head snapping in his direction. You rushed over but instead of dropping to your beloved snow-globe you immediately started checking him. Asking him if he was ok, he almost couldn’t believe it. He’d stuttered out apologies but you just waved them off saying how you thought he was hurt before kissing his cheek and noticing his fatigue. You asked him to go lay down which he didn’t want to do but with the promise that you’d join him after you cleaned this up, he folded. So here he sat, in a chair in the corner reminiscing about all the times you’ve helped him like this.

Like that one time he’d gotten back from a mission especially hurt. He expected you to be asleep, thinking he’d just patch himself up before joining you in bed but he was soon surprised when your form rushed over to him. You’d asked him if he was alright and ended up tending to his wounds. He found out later that you’d stayed up past 1am just to greet him when he got back. You’d shush him with small kisses whenever he winced in pain, apologies slipping past your lips. His heart fluttering at how delicately you touched him, as if he’d break. He knew he loved you but it was shocking how you can make him fall in love all over again.

He sighed, thinking of another memory of you and him. Batman had asked Tim for help on a certain project to upgrade the Batmobiles tech. You’d brought him coffee but soon switched to tea when it was getting primarily late so that he didn’t get burnt out. He watched as you yawned, leaning your head on your arms. Your eyes weren’t closed, you were simply staring at him as he talked about what he was working on. He knew that you didn’t understand everything he was talking about but you still listened and even gave him ideas when he became stumped. Checking the clock and noticing the lateness of the night he asked if you were gonna head to bed soon. You’d shaken your head and told him that you were gonna stay up with him so that he doesn’t get lonely and drown himself in his work which you noticed he tended to do. He could’ve cried right there watching you get up and stretch, grabbing his empty cup before heading to the kitchen to refill it. He sighed lovingly as you walked out of the room.

It was the little things, he concluded, the little things that made him head over heels for you. Like when he’s training with his bo-staff and you come in with water and orange or apple slices, asking him to take a break and recharge for a while. You’ll stand by him, holding the plate while he eats, complimenting him on his form and moves and even comparing it to how he was last week to show that you really were aware of his progress. What shocked him the most though was when you learned some basic bo-staff, knife, and katana moves so that he could train with a real life partner to help with his agility.

Or the times when he'd wake up from night terrors, vivid visions that plagued his mind at night. A frown made it's way to his face as he thought of them, though it quickly fizzled out as he remembered that you were there too. A light that drowned out the darkness of his thoughts. You'd been there for him when he wakes up crying and sometimes even screaming, calming him down and telling him that everything will be alright because you're there. The nights he'd find you watching over him as he slept to make sure that he'll be safe even in his dreams.

"Timothy!" He jumped, your yelling shaking him from his thoughts. "huh?" "Geez I've been calling you ya know." You frowned, "are you alright T?" Your rubbed his shoulder "you know you can talk to me about anything right?" He let out a breathy laugh, feeling one of your hands cup his face. He leaned into the touch, a hum falling from his lips as he smiled. "I know...it's nothing bad I'm just thinking." he shrugged, "about what?" You asked, and he smiled, his eyes stared into yours like a lovesick dog, his grin lopsided. "You." "Me?" He nodded, "I was just thinking about you, and how you treat me." Your eyes widened and your eyebrows raised. "Uhh- Did I...do something wrong?" He shook his head, "you're too good to me. Always worrying about me even now." Your eyes softened and you smiled, "well of course I worry, I care about you a lot you know." You kissed his cheek and he chuckled- mumbling an 'I know' back before standing and pulling you along with him. "Let's head to bed yeah?" He asked and you nodded, taking the lead and pulling him away to your shared bedroom.

----!----

BOOM THIS ONES OUT EARLY!!!

Thanks for reading! Have a great day/night!!

My requests are CLOSED but you can still send me messages to see if I'm close to opening them again!

See my DIRECTORY for upcoming fics!

Masterlist

[sky-fire-forever]

Happy DADWC day! How does some Fenris/Anders/Hawke sound with a bit of ❛  do you ever wonder what it would be like if things were different between us?  ❜

Thank you so much for this prompt!! I'm actually really proud of this one! For @dadrunkwriting

My Hawke in this one is Scorpius, who uses they/them pronouns.

The clinic is nearly spotless from Anders’ thorough clean of the place. He’s been scrubbing the entire area from top to bottom since this morning, trying to rid it of the bloodstains and stench and mysterious mold that grows on the walls. He wants this to be a place of healing, which isn’t made easy when the place is filthy. 

Not that he often has time to clean it. If he isn’t tending to patients, he’s out with Hawke, neither of which leaves a lot of time to actually give the place the cleaning it deserves. Which is why he takes every opportunity that’s dropped into his lap and holds tight with everything he has.

He’s no sooner finished tidying up when the doors burst open and Fenris storms in, supporting a limping and bloodied Hawke.

Anders jumps up immediately, tossing his rag away in favor of his staff. “Maker’s breath, what happened?” He leads Hawke to the examination table and gently sits them atop of it.

There’s so much blood that Anders doesn’t know where to begin searching for a wound. He begins frantically pushing at Hawke’s clothes, anxiously searching for whatever the cause of Hawke’s condition might be. He can’t heal it if he doesn’t know what it is.

“We got into a fight, what else?” Fenris snaps. “Can you heal them or not, mage?” There’s a growl to his voice, one that Anders knows well from whenever he’s concerned or freaked out by something. 

“Yes, of course.” Anders pulls at Hawke’s robes, tossing them aside to get a closer look at their body. “Where were they hit? Do you know?” 

“Everywhere,” Fenris growls like that’s of any use. 

“Did they at any point hit their head?” Anders needs details if he’s going to see Hawke through this. 

“How am I supposed to–”

“Fenris, please!” Anders turns to fix the elf with his best glare. “I need your help if I’m going to heal them.” 

Fenris grits his teeth, but doesn’t lash out again, which Anders takes as progress. “Yes, they hit their head after an arrow shot them in the leg,” he says, speaking slowly as though to control his anger and get his thoughts in order.

Anders nods and summons his healing magic to his fingertips. It comes as naturally as breathing to heal, to help, to undo the damage done by destructive forces. Ironic, considering what a destructive force he himself has been known to be. 

He brings his magic to Hawke’s head, watching their face as they hiss in pain. 

“I know, love,” he says sympathetically. “I know it hurts, but I need to repair the damage.” 

Head injuries can be rather nasty if not taken care of right away, which is exactly why it was the first thing Anders asked about. He pours his magic into repairing any damage done to the brain and skull, taking care not to worsen any of the injuries. When he’s done, he sets to healing the damage in Hawke’s leg. 

It takes almost an hour to cure Hawke of all of their ailments, patching up each injury as he discovers them or Fenris tells him about them. By the time it’s over, Hawke lays fast asleep on the examination table, drooling slightly as they dream. 

Anders is exhausted. His mana is spent and he’s completely drained, emotionally and physically. It hurts him to see his partner in so much pain, to be forced to be the cause of some of that pain in order to heal them. 

He takes a step away from the table, wiping his brow and sighing. “There. That should do it.” 

“They’re… alright, then?” Fenris asks from where he’s been sitting in the corner, watching on with rapt attention. 

“Yes, though they should rest as much as possible.” Anders watches Hawke fondly, taking in the sight of the drool smeared across their lips and catching in their beard. They’re beautiful, even like this. Even still drenched in blood after fighting for their life. Even out completely cold. Anders doesn’t think there exists a condition in which Hawke wouldn’t be absolutely beautiful. 

Fenris nods. “I should… take them back to their estate, then.” He pauses, as if uncertain. “Unless I should take them back to my residence in order to have someone watch over them?” 

“I can be at home with them,” Anders says easily. “I was just about finished in here anyway.” Except that there are now new bloodstains to be cleaned. Oh well, those will just have to wait. 

Fenris clears his throat. “You misunderstand. I would like to be with them.” 

“Oh.” Anders blinks, caught off guard. He can’t blame Fenris for wanting to be with Hawke to make sure they’re alright — he’s just as much their lover as Anders is, after all — but Anders still finds himself almost forgetting about Hawke’s relationship with Fenris at times. 

There had been a time when it had been just Hawke and Anders. For three years, in fact, after Fenris had walked away and Anders had stayed. Sometimes, on his worse days, Anders wonders if Hawke ever would have chosen to be with him had Fenris not walked away first, but Hawke is always quick to soothe those fears the moment they catch wind of them. 

This relationship between the three of them is still tenuous and new. It’s still in its infancy and Anders doesn’t want to do anything to break it. 

“Of course you can be with them,” he says hurriedly. “As long as… well, I’d like to be there too.” 

“Of course.” Fenris looks just as uncomfortable as Anders feels, which brings Anders some amount of relief. 

They wake Hawke just long enough to coax them back to their mansion, using the cellar entrance located not far from Anders’ clinic. They manage to get them through the estate without any trouble and tuck them into bed together. 

Hawke looks up at them both as they snuggle beneath their sheets, their mind still addled from exhaustion. “Look at you two, getting along.” They beam at them both. “I love you both so much.” 

Anders and Fenris look at one another, a blush rising to each of their cheeks. “And we love you, Hawke,” Fenris says in a softer voice than Anders has ever heard from him. “Now you must rest.” 

“Healer’s orders,” Anders adds. 

Hawke nods sleepily and less than a moment later, they’re out like a light. 

Anders smiles at his sleeping lover and brushes some of their hair back. They’re still quite bloody, but that can be dealt with in the morning. 

“Do you ever wonder what things would have been like?” Fenris asks out of nowhere. 

Anders turns to look at him. “Pardon?” 

“Do you wonder what things would have been like if things were different? Between us, I mean.” He gestures to the three of them. 

Anders doesn’t like this line of thinking. “What’s the point of wondering? Things are how they are.” 

“I think about it often,” Fenris says, either not picking up on Anders’ discomfort or not caring. “If I hadn’t walked out that night…” 

“Do you think they would have chosen you?” Anders blurts out before he can think better of it. “If you hadn’t left, do you think they would have been happy with just you?” 

Fenris eyes Anders curiously. “No,” he says after a long pause. “No, I think they would have loved you just as much as they do now, if not more.” 

Anders is honestly surprised by that answer. “You truly believe that?” 

“I do.” Fenris is silent for a moment. “I do not believe any relationship between Hawke and myself would have lasted if I had allowed it to continue,” he says. “I sometimes think this is the best way it could have been.” 

Anders scoffs. “Even though it includes me?” He can’t keep the note of bitterness from his tone. 

Surely Fenris would rather be with Hawke on his own, without having to share them with Anders. They’re like two wolves who have decided to share a piece of meat: there will always be too little for each of them and they’ll both be left hungry. 

Fenris watches Anders with an expression Anders can’t read. “Do you feel dissatisfied with your relationship with Hawke due to my inclusion?” 

“No,” Anders says quickly and he realizes it’s true. Hawke never leaves him out in the cold if he needs them and they’re just as doting and loving towards him as they’ve always been. It’s simply… different now. Now Anders can turn his head and see that same affection directed towards someone else. 

Sometimes seeing it makes his stomach twist with envy, jealousy brewing in his heart. A part of him screams that it’s unjust for him to have to share, to not get Hawke all to himself, but he knows that part of him isn’t true Justice. 

It’s just his own pride and jealousy and ego. He knows that, has always known that. He’d known it from the moment he agreed that Hawke should be allowed to pursue a relationship with Fenris. 

Sometimes it stings, but then he thinks of how happy Hawke is to share their love. The smile on their face when they look at Fenris is so similar to the smile Anders sees when Hawke looks at him and who is he to deny Hawke more happiness? All he wants is Hawke’s happiness. 

And Hawke needs someone there for them when Anders does what he has to do. When he betrays them and their trust, he needs them to not be alone. Fenris can make them happy, can help with the decision to put a knife in Anders’ back for his crimes. He can make it easier. 

“They love you,” Anders says. “That doesn’t stop them from loving me too.” 

“It does not,” Fenris agrees. “They are someone capable of much love.” 

Anders nods and takes a seat beside Fenris. “Thank you, Fenris. For being there for them.”

Fenris sits silently, but Anders understands. 

[inchidentally]

It’s giving engineering student Oscar on the first day of his Motorsport internship!!!!!

(BFBFFBFBFB he's lucky he's so gd beautiful bc he rly said 'let me find the most boring backdrop I possibly ca--ooh is tha empty tarmac? perfect')

dj!escort!Lando is booked at MTC for a gig to unveil their new car and decides to scroll their socials while flying back from Vietnam w Martin. first he sees Oscar posing stiffly in the new odd shirtdress race suit and decides why not zoom in on it. who he at first thought was just some kid turns out to have a beautiful slim waist and mile long legs under the suit. pretty little hands too. oh and the face... is very good. defined jaw and cheekbones, cute nose, pretty brown eyes. the kind of soft hair you want to run your fingers through after sex. the mouth is more intriguing than he'd first thought. pretty pink lips and sort of pouty. would probably turn hot pink after being kissed for an hour. maybe even a blood red after blowing Lando in the-- damn. Lando has to adjust himself and close out the photos.

so maybe he spends the rest of the plane ride ignoring the rest of the guys by going to this Oscar Piastri's accounts. gets absolutely stuck on a picture he'd posted that day with a middle aged emoji and terrible photo composition. but god if the pretty face and mussed soft hair doesn't more than make up for it. he looks like he's had nothing but vanilla sex, safe amounts of alcohol and the only excitement in his life is driving F1 cars. which to be fair looks fucking amazing.

but Oscar deserves to get wild sometimes. deserves to get absolutely wrecked. because from what Lando can tell, the guy almost never takes time off unless its to visit his family Australia. if he's not racing then he's in the simulator or he's in meetings or training. and god, the body he has under those team issued clothes. lean and strong in the arms and legs and waist but surprisingly thick and curvy in the ass and pecs. Lando can picture all that pale skin stretched out on his hotel bed, turning pink wherever Lando's big tan hands grope him. how embarrassed he'd get when Lando squeezes an entire pec in his hands and draws a nipple into his mouth. the cute way he'd flush up and probably throw a hand over his eyes when Lando slung each of the boy's knees over his shoulders and gave him a perineum beard burn he'd feel for days.

Lando startles when one of the road crew knocks over an entire bottle of champagne. by the time he looks back at the awkwardly smiling photo of Oscar out in wherever the hell he was, doing testing or whatever, Lando feels almost ashamed about what he has planned for this nerdy kid who clearly has no idea how hot he is.

but when he finally meets Oscar in person and realizes the boy has at least three inches height on him - most of which seems to run in his legs - Lando gives him a sharktooth grin, a thorough once over that has the boy blushing pink, and ignores everything the weird American dude is saying to him.

[swbbb6]

Regarding Scorch. A tangent…

I did not enjoy that ending for Scorch. I didn’t understand the use of Scorch to begin with, but I kept it to myself, because I foolishly wanted to believe it would/could make sense somehow.

But that didn’t happen! So it’s time for a fixit; a look into what (I think) it would take for it to make sense 😅

For starters, I don’t think it was a mistake to use a member of the Delta Squad; they are often regarded as a precursor to The Bad Batch, so we know they’re extremely capable commandos. Even more deadly than Arc troopers. It could have easily been a great parallel between the two special operations teams.

Having said that, if it had been up to me, I would have used Sev instead of Scorch; reason being, (aside from Scorch canonically having a big personality that was completely absent from his tbb portrayal) Sev went missing on Kashyyyk at around about the same time order 66 was given. Which begs the other question; if you’re going to use Scorch, where was the rest of Delta Squad?

When Sev went missing, the rest of Delta Squad wanted to go back for him, but they were ordered to leave him behind. In all the confusion that was order 66, it would have been a convenient time for the Tantiss scientists to round up as many clones as possible, from as many varied backgrounds as possible. I know that sounds like a stretch, but it’s the fact that the rest of Delta Squad was ordered to leave Sev behind that’s suspicious to me (when considering what Palpatine’s men were secretly doing to clones). A member of the famous Delta Squad would be a big get for them.

Moreover, it was something Crosshair said that stuck with me: when he told the rest of The Batch about the experiments being conducted on Tantiss, and the CX program, he said he couldn’t be brainwashed because he’s defective. But then why did they keep trying? Why did they keep torturing him? Especially after they got ahold of Omega the first time, why not kill Crosshair at that point, if he really was useless to them?

My theory is, the stronger the victim, the longer it takes to fully break them down. I could imagine Sev would hold out longer than the regs, and depending on how thorough they had to be, it would also explain why this once super-badass was reduced down to (a completely incompetent) Henchmen #1.

I’ve seen it mentioned that the light behind Scorch’s helmet didn’t go out when he fell, so he could’ve survived; I’m a little skeptical tbh, but sure, I’ll allow it. Go ahead and give The Bad Batch their happy ending (they deserve it!) but then (if we continue to say it was Sev and not Scorch), they could have given us a post-credit scene, or a May The Fourth/Revenge Of The Fifth teaser of the rest of Delta Squad finding Sev. Delta Squad is very self-contained, and isolated, even more than TBB, which would explain why it has taken them so much longer to find their missing brother; they don’t have the same resources TBB has (Rex, mostly).

So many people have asked “why include Scorch at all?” “That wasn’t Scorch!” “It literally could’ve been anyone else!” And I agree! I think with more background, a lot more questions could’ve been answered in a way that actually made sense, for both The Bad Batch, and Delta Squad, and made the fans happy in the process!

Not to mention maybe we could’ve gotten another Republic Commando game, or even a spin off series for Delta Squad??

[heliphantie]

It's not symmetrical or perfect But it's beautiful, and it's mine

Some long ramblings about Isabela under 'read more':

I originally didn’t use to be interested in Isabela, brushing her aside as yet another emancipated princess character, but with time, I figured she’s more dimensional and distinctive character of her kind, and possibly, most multifaceted one next to Bruno. More than that, the two, as opposite they look on the surface, have enough things in common for him to have more rapport with her than with Mirabel, as movie seems to suggest.

First of all, magnitude of their powers. All of original triplets have got gifts that surpass any others in the family, outright divine in nature – abilities of healing, conduct the weather and foreseeing future. While out of third generation, Isabela has got an ultimate divine power – of bringing life out of thin air, and in accordance with her emotional state no less. Thus, her powers also require thorough control, which may be another hidden reason for her always needing to keep herself straight. And it’s apparent too, bearers of greatest gifts are also under hardest pressure, with Bruno and Isabela even visually (in the sequence of “Dos Oruguitas”) indicated to be most subjected to.

Second thing is, external and internal presentation. Out of all characters, the two have the most conflict between public perception and genuine expression, and an array of different facades in case of both – from impassive and contemptuous to caring and heartful. We don’t get to see any objective view of Bruno’s behavior in the past, but from how he’s perceived in retrospect, it appears he used to give off impression of distant and uncaring to people around him, which could’ve been simply an effect of his professional duty, including acting impartial to the events he gets to witness as local oracle and avoiding personal interference with anybody’s fate (just my conclusion, anyway). Which is rather similar to Isabela’s acting around people – pleasant, but not extremely intimate, more like performer than participant, and impression of egoistic, haughty person she leaves on Mirabel. (Did encounter with and insight of real Bruno give no clue about what her sister’s situation would be? It’s not a Mirabel-bashing article, but she’s one dense protag, I must say…) In that, they’re two people in family who appear to bottle their feelings and maintain the constructed façade the most of all (“So much hides behind my smile…”). In addition, as parallel to Isabela’s built image of conventional feminine “perfection”, Bruno has his own invented persona of Hernando, which seemingly serves as “perfect”, and more stereotypically masculine version of himself. (Their natural selves are, of course, still properly feminine/masculine, just of more subtle and nuanced variety.)

And what is fundamental trait shared between two: the extreme selflessness and devotion, and sense of responsibility, being prone to self-sacrifice with long-lasting consequences and openly declaring their willingness to give it all for the family. Which also slips into coming to well-intended, but misguided, and even hurtful in perspective, decisions: no, making yourself a traitor in the eyes of your relatives, never getting rewarded for your good will, while for noble reasons, is not going to bring family together, and neither does confining yourself to lifetime of fake love relationship (and hell knows how suppressed discontent seeping through would manifest itself in the end of things… Mariano dodged a bullet, also not deserving such misery). Anyhow, willfully getting your freedom cut short for the rest of your life for the sake of wellbeing and benefit of your loved ones is tremendous sacrifice (and yet again, it’s such a short sight on Mirabel’s part to take confession of that sacrifice lightly, beside of not realizing she is a case of Isa’s predicament, what with approving a proposal behind her sister’s back). And that’s where Isa is deconstructing Disney rebellious princess archetype even before her breaking out: unlike Jasmine or Merida, she actually holds her family in priority over whatever carefree life she could lead, and makes mature move, total opposite of pampered princess Mira thinks she is. It should be said, marriage is not something exactly forced upon Isa, but rather silently accepted on the assumption she does return affection of would-be fiancé. While Isabela seemingly doesn’t have the same luxury as Jasmine to reject suitors left and right (it doesn’t seem there’s a lot of options…), nor fiancé in question is as obnoxious as any of Jasmine’s, or, say, Gaston, she definitely has enough authority around the town to deem any suitor unworthy of herself or make her own choice, so she’s not that submissive in that situation as it may look. (And nothing indicates any of older Madrigals were forced into arranged marriage, which makes me think that is not entirely in Alma’s hands to decide on whom or if her children going to marry.) It appears, based on observation of similarities between Alma and Isa being possible reason for her singling the granddaughter out as her favorite, Alma might just have been projecting her own perfect romance on the young couple, being convinced they’re destined for each other just as she and Pedro were, and have to make up for her own abruptly cut matrimonial bliss, not taking in account Isa doesn’t have to be her carbon copy. Note that, entering marriage, Isa is not simply getting what she (presumably) wants, she puts herself in a role of next (after Julieta, most likely) matriarch, a head of family, a ruler of town, accepting huge responsibility, quite an opposite of effort-free fairytale life.

Which brings me to connection between characters affirmed in the movie itself: what was exact output of Bruno’s words – either prophetic or not – for Isabela? She is the only one, whose prophecy wasn’t appearing to fulfill itself, and she doesn’t comment on it even in the moment of honesty. We never get closure on that issue, let alone any conversation between two (because poor Bruno was denied of opportunity explaining himself properly by his kind relatives…). One answer that seems to be likely correct in context of Bruno’s reputation: because his vision always undoubtedly becomes reality, promise of the dreams coming true was taken for granted, and Isa considered that, as long as she goes with the flow and doesn’t take the initiative in deciding for herself, she obtains happiness by default. So, she’s basically another princess in waiting for the miracle (hm…) until she gets to break free on her own, which is consistent with modern trend of Disney subverting and defeating their own fairytale standard.

But other possible interpretation is: what if that promise, while leading to wrongful and harmful conviction, was giving her strength to follow her path and assigned duty, vested with faith she, by doing right thing, eventually will become a master of her life and achieve fulfillment. (And probably, it makes sense for her to think Mirabel, revealed being linked with imminent destruction of miracle, somehow also leads to her miraculous destiny being dissolved with no hope left.)

Worth noting, it brings up a parallel with classic story about destiny – and also another one of Disney fairytale standard – tale of Sleeping Beauty, blessed with magical gifts and cursed with ominous future, outcome of which tale being basically the same as Encanto movie: fighting future is dangerous, some losses are inevitable, but what’s matter is what we learn and take from it to improve even more distant future. Also, there’s even visual parallel – Aurora’s two-colored in funky manner dress as result of fairy godmothers fighting over its color, and Isabela’s multicolored holi’d dress, I wonder how intentional it was.

And one another minor and not instantly obvious connection, not clearly visible in the movie: both Isa and Bruno may be “brains” of the family! Some concept arts depict Isa being something of a bookworm, and while you have to be really observant (or peek at production art), there’s hints in Bruno’s environment he’s one himself – in addition to some books in his hideout, there’s drawings on the walls showing doodles of rats in casting of stage plays of Shakespeare’s tragedies and “Don Quixote” (both are not exactly light literature).

And while Isabela being an intellectual isn’t something directly stated in the movie, it’s still part of her development and isn’t contradicted by anything on screen. Though she probably may give preference to non-fiction on the topic of biology. Speaking of nerdy inclinations…   

One last (rather tangential) thing worth of discussion: abandoned Bubo storyline and its connection to ultimate version of story. For the aspects that justify it being scraped for good: first, as I stated above, her being actually loyal to family, instead of trying to elope, makes for all more powerful presentation of her character. Second, is unfortunate implication of her being driven to person simply because he understands her (which is valid on its own) rather than because she likes him for his own qualities and personality. But it may be just lack of context for single scene, otherwise dynamic of two people with connection to nature and such contrasting behavior and appear is pretty endearing. (Official source states the storyline is written off so Isa in the end does not “defined by a man”, but then, Mirabel is treated like hero and she’s “defined” by two men, given she’s in need the word of Bruno on what action to take, and if we take literally statement that she was “send by Pedro” to save the family…) So while I appreciate her ending as more independent and decisive person, I still like how concept of that relationship speaks of her personality, and it did find its way in final version, even if in funny way, by replacing man with cactus:) Even as brief moment leading to big reformative number, having her admiring the “imperfect”, peculiar creature gives evidence of her carrying deep fondness for unconventional forms of beauty, fascination for irregular, whimsical (as opposed to what she’s assigned for -  Mariano, while having his own depths and not entirely flawless as well, kind of dorky in his own way, is simply that – conventional and too ordinary for Isa to spark interest). And considering that trait of her was maintained through the variations of story, it seems more than plausible she may develop profound fondness and connection with her eccentric (and definitely “fish out of water”, as Bubo is described) uncle, which makes it a loss that the story didn’t even tipped toe into interaction between the characters. (And it’s hard to overlook, Bubo’s personal and even physical traits also seem to transfer into final version of Bruno, so the character’s concept wasn’t entirely lost either.)

On the final note, bunch of random musings about the character of Isa, that neither here nor there:

Speaking of unpredictable nature of gift and popular parallel between Isabela and Elsa: may it be that Isabela had to teach herself to regulate her power for pretty much the same reason, given connection between emotions and outcome, and inability for child to properly control it? Even in suppressed state, Isa’s powers have dangerous side to them: we see her being able to use vines to restrain people, making flowers grow from every surface, and later she creates carnivorous plants and just unleashes botanical chaos all around the town, not to mention that her negative emotions resurface itself as plants that unsafe for handling. Between Alma’s worried notion that Isabela got “out of control” and Bruno’s reluctance to face her (which he only partially admits to be for the fear to meet Alma), there could be something that young (and simply not being in existence yet) Mirabel might not knowing about full effect of Isa’s power when unbound and under emotional affect.

And one aspect that felt conflicting to me for some time: as for type of person with “green thumb” she’s supposed to embody (and more prominent “child of nature” image with which her character was conceived at first), Isabela acts rather violently, shown destroying her creations, plucking roses out of her flower bed, ruining topiary and such. But considering she’s not simply nature lover and expert (who she seems to genuinely be), but embodiment of nature itself, like Pepa is an embodiment of atmospheric forces, it’s organic for her to having embraced its destructive side as well, as part of death and resurrection circle. /So she’s a bit of like Stitch, with equally creative and destructive inclinations at one because of immense abilities she’s packed with:)/

I definitely have a little more to say, and contemplate, about the character… but some of it going too far into speculative and fanfic-y territory, so it’s a topic for another time. And sorry for all incidental Mirabel kicking:) – I have things to say about her too, but in its own turn.

[ncityprincess]

the peeping jae

plot: perv loser jae listening to his jock roommate johnny and his hot cheerleader girlfriend fuck

MDNI!!! MATURE CONTENT this is extremely out of my comfort zone, but it's been sitting in the back of my mind. I love loser jae, you love loser jae, we ALL love loser jae. picture subway jaehyun and faster stage Johnny for reference. jae is a peeping tom in this story, just trying to listen in on some action. Johnny and OC are very mean to him, but it's somewhat deserved I guess? lots of degrading, voyerism, and overall smutty fun. but of course, NONE of this is reflective of how I think these men are in real life. this is just fiction. happy reading :)

it wasn't supposed to be like this. you weren't supposed to find out.

jeong jaehyun was a star engineering major at NCIT. all of his professors adored him. he always listened attentively in his lectures, took thorough notes, and aced his exams with flying colors. he was surely on track to be the valedictorian of his class.

that being said, his niche knowledge of rollercoaster mechanics and his overall...vibe wasn't exactly a mate attractor. he wore khakis and collared tops that his mom would send him each semester. he didn't care for, nor know about the latest brand name shoes or clothes. he kept a handkerchief in his pocket in case his nervous sweat got out of control. needless to say, the inexperienced college student was far from a ladies man. the farthest he had gone was a kiss on a cheek from his neighbor next door senior year of high school. their moms thought it would be a good idea for them to go to the prom together. he thought his soul might leave his body when his date leaned over and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

besides that and pleasuring himself to some good ole pornos, jeong jaehyun's sexual experiences were quite scarce. I guess it didn't bother him per say? I mean, did he want to know what sex was like? what boobs felt like in real life? how many licks it took to get a girl to squirt? of course! but the thought of actually talking to a girl makes his nervous sweat act up, cue his handkerchief drenched in sweat. so that's why he preferred keeping his head down, focusing on his studies, and staying out of the way.

that was until one particular Friday night came around.

you had always stayed over Johnny (and his) dorm thursday-saturday nights. Thursdays were party nights, and you being the darling cheer captain and THE Johnny Suh's girlfriend, it was customary that you two attend every huge NCIT rager. The handsome hockey captain and the gorgeous head cheerleader were never far apart from one another. of course, you couldn't bare to sleep away from your man in your clingy drunken state, which was why Thursday nights were a given. Friday and Saturday were spent simultaneously recovering from Thursday's events and loving up on one another.

the awkward engineering student usually stayed out of the way when you came over, not wanting to intrude on your couple time and possibly make the large athlete angry. jaehyun either spent his weekends back at home, or in his dorm room watching sci-fi movies. this weekend, he decided to stay on campus to get a head start on his engineering project for class.

after a few hours of setting up the blueprint for his rollercoaster design project, he made his way to the kitchen to get a glass of water. he had to walk past Johnny's room to get to the kitchen, but a certain sound made him stop in his tracks. it was a sound that shot straight to his downstairs area. a loud, drawn out moan ricocheted off the walls of their apartment style dorm. he instantly knew what you two were doing behind that door. his thirst was still there, but this time it was a different type of thirst he needed quenched.

he knew it was wrong. he knew he shouldn't have done it, but the second the thought entered his mind his feet moved faster than his brain. he tiptoed closer to johnny's door and gently put his ear up to it. blood rushed straight to his dick when he heard the sounds of you moaning and whining. he fantasized about what you two could've been doing in there right now.

were you getting fucked? were his fingers deep inside your tight little pussy? were you about to come? oh how he wished he could be a fly on the wall. he settled for being a fly outside of the door instead.

"mmm baby your tongue feels so gooood" you moaned out.

Johnny had his head buried under your skirt, his tongue making your sensitive bud feel so good. you were topless, letting your hands roam over your large breasts.

"oh yeah? how about my fingers? do they feel good too?" your boyfriend asked as he plunged two fingers into your pussy.

you squealed, rocking your hips against johnny's face, begging him for more.

jaehyun was so close to shoving his hand down his pants to relieve himself of the pressure, but he didn't want to go that far. it'd probably be best to savor these dirty sounds and store them in his memories for later tonight when he's all alone in the darkness of his room.

suddenly, the deliciously pornographic sound of you cumming broke him out of his thoughts, driving him absolutely insane. he wondered what it would be like having such a sexy girl like you in his bed, making those sounds all because of him. for now, he had to settle for being an outsider looking in.

"fuck, I gotta go grab a condom from my wallet, it's in the living room" Johnny said as he got up from underneath your skirt.

"um hello? don't we have plenty in the drawer right here" you asked, impatiently waiting for your boyfriend to stick his dick in you already.

"had–yuta snagged a couple during homecoming weekend, jungwoo and haechan took some for their camping trip with a few of your teammates, and besides… you KNOW we're not exactly prudes babe." he said wiggling his eyebrows.

you blushed, "whatever, just hurry up before I use my vibrator instead"

"only if I can watch"

you threw a pillow at him and he headed for the door

"alright alright, feisty"

Johnny opened the door and collided into a tall, lanky figure.

jaehyun jumped back and made a frightened, surprised sound.

you shrieked and covered your exposed chest with your discarded top.

"yo, what the fuck are you doing man!?" Johnny asked his suspicious roommate.

"uh I uh–I was just gonna–I–uhhh–" jaehyun frantically stuttered.

"were you just spying on my girlfriend and I, freak!?"

"n–n–no I was just"

"y–y–you were just WHAT jeong"

before jaehyun could come up with an answer Johnny grabbed him by the collar of his polo shirt and shoved him into the wall.

jaehyun's eyes went wide with fear, knowing he wouldn't be able to defend himself from the 6 foot 2 jock.

"baby! put him down." you said calmly

Johnny and jaehyun stopped and looked at you in shock, the latter also silently thanking you.

"what? this loser was probably getting off to us just now" Johnny said with anger evident in his voice.

you sat up on the bed, no longer bothering to cover your boobs.

"can't you see babe? jaehyun clearly liked what he heard. I mean, look at him"

Johnny snapped out of it a bit, and slowly released jaehyun from his hold. he stood back a bit and took in jaehyun's flustered form, and his very obvious hard on.

Johnny chuckled condescendingly "haha, you're right babe. the dork's got a raging boner. what's the matter jeong, huh? my pretty girlfriend's got your dick doing the thinking for ya?"

jaehyun felt his ears getting even more red, if it was even possible. he finally hung his head in shame and muffled out an apology.

"huh? what was that? couldn't hear you dork speak up" Johnny said

jaehyun took in a deep breath and finally lifted his head up to look Johnny in the eye.

"I said I'm sorry"

"hmph, sorry for what, loser?" Johnny replied, puffing his chest out and smirking

"I'm sorry for spying on you and your girlfriend. I shouldn't have done that" jaehyun wanted nothing more than to escape to his room and never come out again.

"ahem, where's MY apology?" you finally spoke up.

jaehyun looked at you from the doorway, trying painfully hard to not look at your exposed breasts.

"sorry y/n, I was wrong for listening to you guys"

"mmm, i'm not sure i'm convinced" you said with faux sadness.

jaehyun stuttered for a moment, not sure what else to say or do in this extremely uncomfortable moment.

"get on your knees and crawl to foot of the bed" you demanded in a soft voice

"uhhh, pardon?" jaehyun squeaked out

"she SAID, get on your knees and crawl to her. DONT make her tell you again" Johnny gritted in jaehyun's ear.

jaehyun immediately sank to his knees and made his way over to you, feeling even more shame than he felt before. once he made it to the foot of the bed you kneeled directly in front of him, breasts on full display.

"now, apologize again, like you mean it this time"

jaehyun could barely look you in the eye. shame and humiliation really setting in now.

"y/n, I swear it'll never happen again. I won't even look at you anymore please, I'm so so sorry for being a pervert. please."

you stared down at him for a few moments. you were disgusted by how creepy his behavior was. he barely so much as made eye contact with you whenever you came to johnny's place. where did he get the balls to do something so dirty all of a sudden?

but a part of you also felt a newfound sense of power. your boyfriend loved to call the shots and you loved letting him even more. but right now, you wanted a taste of that power. you wanted to show this peasant who the true king and queen were around here. you looked up at Johnny, who was still standing in the doorway watching this all go down. you two made deep eye contact, and the two of you instantly knew how the rest of the night was going to go.

you grabbed jaehyun's chin with your pink manicured nails. "listen you little freak, you like invading people's privacy huh? well now you're gonna sit here and watch my boyfriend rail the shit out of me all night long. and you're gonna sit there, be a good boy and keep your hands to yourself, do I make myself clear?"

the end💋

[empressofmankind]

Team Triassic I - Once in a blue moon

[Crocodile x Shivs (F!OC) ]

ft. their 12-year-old daughter wanting to go to dino summer camp

Teen and up - 4k / 10 pg

(A/N) - I love Camp Cretaceous and nobody can stop me from doing exactly what I want. Which, apparently, was making a cross-over of that series with @tiredemomama and mine highly specific One Piece content. Because what Benji and Iggy deserve is going on dino summer camp. And no amount of strict parenting from Crocodile and Benn Beckman, respectively, can stop it from happening.

Tag(s): Feel good slice-of-life. Mildly diabetes inducing romantic affection. Fluff with plot hints! Family dynamics. Warning for child-parent argument. Overprotective parents. Smoking. Crack fic. CC x OP cross over.

🏝️🏝️🏝️

The acacia wood double doors with their engraved mosasauri loomed over Benji as she stood before them. Her palms were clammy, her fingers leafing through the papers she clutched to her chest - the info brochure about the remodelled VIP resort, a detailed map of the tropical island, booking information and transport timetables. She'd even made a packing list and prepared a thorough estimate of the costs.

She stared up at the doors and swallowed.

He just had to say ‘yes’.

🏝️🏝️🏝️

“No.”

“DAD!” 

Benji stomped her foot before she thought better of it. The scowl that pulled her father’s lips down around his cigar spelled an imminent extinction event as surely as the K-Pg asteroid. She did her best to adjust her speech to a level, business-like tone. The kind her father was amenable to. “I mean, it’s not a big island?” She unfolded the map of Isla Nublar, smoothed out the creases and slid it across his desk in as casual a manner as she could manage.

The sudden shift in his daughter’s demeanour reminded Crocodile of her mother, and he took his cigar in hand to hide his smile as he leaned forward to study the map. “And where would you be staying?”

“Well, we will help the park rangers, sooo,” Benji started, trying to figure out post-haste how to make it sound as safe as possible.

Crocodile caught her gaze. “When you are not with an adult.”

“Oh! At camp, here.” Benji pointed to a spot marked ‘camp’ on the northern side of the island, some kilometres inland from the northern dock, in an area called ‘Sector B’.

Crocodile tapped the map with the tip of his hook. “What is this red marker right here across from where you are staying?”

“That’s the, um,” Benji clasped her hands behind her back and dodged her father’s gaze. “The compsognathus paddock.”

“Aren’t those carnivores?” Crocodile asked from around his cigar, noting similar red markers around the island. Many of them are in Sector B.

Benji rolled up on her toes and back down. “Well, yes. But!” - and she caught his gaze then - “They are quite small, barely above the knee. My knee! Not yours. I could kick them if they come too close.”

Crocodile took the cigar from his mouth, blowing out smoke as he watched her little nervous shifts. She really wanted to go, and he really did not want her to go. Even less now, with this map full of red markers awfully close to their camp.

“Why would you be close to it?”

“I wouldn’t!” Benji immediately agreed. “They’re in a paddock, like I said. People don’t go in the paddocks. That would defeat the point of them.”

“And I assume these paddocks are well secured?” Crocodile said, tapping the various red markers near the camp with the tip of his hook. There were abbreviations across them: MLS, CNT, TSR. The one nearest camp read CSN - compsognathus, she’d said. He frowned. There was an unmarked one, north of the second lake.

“Absolutely. All dinosaurs have ID-chips with which they are tracked at all times, even the herbivores,” Benji said as she tapped one of the green markers. “The carnivores are all in high security paddocks, so it is not dangerous at all.”

“Weighing several tonnes and being carnivorous is the very definition of dangerous,” Crocodile remarked as he leaned back in his seat, watching her little jaw work.

“There are regular boat schedules,” Benji said, as she gave him the booking information and transport timetable. “You and mom could come visit whenever you like?”

According to the timetable, a boat from the mainland arrived every four hours at the northern dock. Though the booking information suggested reserving spots well in advance of the tourist season you meant to visit in.

“Hm.”

It wasn’t a ‘no’, so Benji took it as a positive sign. Smiling widely, she leaned her whole conversational weight into her argument as she unfolded the flyer for the remodelled VIP resort, a short drive north of camp. “You would stay quite close by, here,” she said as she pointed it out on the map while sliding him the brochure, open on the flattering promotional photos of the brand new top floor luxury apartments.

Crocodile shifted his cigar to the other corner of his mouth as he leaned forward to inspect the location and pictures. The shots featured impressive panorama views of the surrounding rainforest, and snaps of modern beige-is-the-new-white interiors with floor to ceiling honeycomb windows. The text boasted of the exclusive resort having a top of the line gym, beautiful spa and a large rooftop pool.

“It has a helipad now, too,” Benji said. “So you and mom wouldn’t even have to take the boat if you didn’t feel like it.”

“That is convenient,” Crocodile agreed, flipping through the brochure.

“And you could take the new Cretaceous cruise,” she added eagerly, pointing out the easternmost lake and the river snaking down from it towards the sea. “It leads past dozens of dinosaurs - herbivores, of course, but very cool ones!” Realising her father’s notion of the word cruise differed from what this was, she quickly added: “Though it is not actually by ship, but with kayaks. But mom would totally love that!”

For one glorious moment, Benji thought she had him.

“Tempting,” Crocodile said as he took his cigar from his mouth to tap the excess ash off. “But no, you’re not going.”

“But dad!”

“I said no.”

“It isn’t even that expensive, and I’ve saved up,” Benji pleaded as she shoved her notepad with all the tabulated costs under his nose. “I can totally pitch in!”

“Benjamine.” Crocodile put the curve of his hook on her notebook and nudged it back to her. “It’s not about that.”

“I want to go.”

“I know you do, sweetheart,” he said as he watched her chew her bottom lip, staring at all the map instead of him. “But your mother and I think it is too dangerous, they---.”

“You think it’s too dangerous,” Benji said, biting back her frustrated tears. She’d asked her mom first. Something like this would have appealed to her as well. She should have said ‘yes’. Instead, she’d said ‘ask your father’. 

“---They have done nothing such as this before,” Crocodile continued, ignoring her comment. “Perhaps you can go next year. How’s that?”

“I want to go this year,” Benji said, bottom lip trembling despite herself. “I’d be… I’d…”

Seeing her small face crumble and tone falter nearly deflated his resolve. He pushed his chair back and beckoned her, and the little girl rushed into the hug. Benji didn’t want to go next year, she wanted to go this year. She’d be one of the first young rangers! She’d be famous for something! Like her parents.

“You can go next year,” Crocodile said as he stroked her long hair, holding the girl close. 

She glanced up at him and her resigned look dug into him. “You promise?”

“I promise,” he said and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

When the door to his office suddenly banged open, Crocodile shielded the girl on instinct alone.

“I am staying with Miguela in Venice in two weeks!” Robin fumed as she stalked straight towards them, boots clacking on the parquetry like a particularly angry woodpecker. Benji felt her father tense - always a bad sign. She glanced at her big sister from across the socket of his hook. Robin was so angry she was actually turning pink.

“Should have thought of that before you pulled that stunt,” Crocodile said. “You can visit your girlfriend some other time.”

“She’s not my! Hng.” Robin balled her hands into fists. All six of them. “It’s during the Venice Carnival! I am not going to the stupid dino dweeb island.”

“Dino dweeb island..?” Benji repeated softly.

Crocodile heard it though and he could now see the cogwheels turn behind her green eyes. “She’s going there as a camp counsellor,” he said as he preemptively raised his hand when Benji opened her mouth. “To work, not to have fun.”

“I am so not going!” Robin said, her voice pitching.

“I could work!” Benji said. “And if she’s going, I’ll be totally safe!”

“I will feed you to the nearest bitchy little sister eating dinosaur I see,” Robin threatened.

“Robin,” Crocodile warned.

“You can’t!” Benji grinned. “All the carni’s are in paddocks!”

“I’ll wrap you in leaves and find one of those big dumb ones!”

“Quiet, both of you!” Crocodile said, but neither of the girls even so much as looked at him.

“They’re not dumb! You’re dumb!” Benji called back, straight past him. “You couldn’t even find the right leaves if you tried.”

“Maybe I’ll find the wrong leaves and poison them,” Robin bit back.

“No! You can’t do that!” Benji exclaimed as she jumped up. “You’re---!”

“QUIET.”

The girls froze at his raised voice and finally held their tongues.

“Robin, pack whatever bags you think you need. You are leaving this Thursday,” Crocodile said in the sudden and oppressive silence. “Benji, you’re staying here and that is final.”

“Why can Robin go?” Benji demanded. “Why isn’t it dangerous for her?”

“She’s older and...”

Benji burst into tears then. “She always gets things first!”

Crocodile rose, moved towards her, but she stepped back as she glared up at him.

“Its not fair!” Benji shouted and stormed out of his office.

“Benji--!” he started, but she was already gone.

Robin shot him a look like a knife right before she pulled the door closed behind her. “I hope she hates you forever.”

Crocodile stared at the door. Then sat down heavily and rubbed his face, tapping his hook across his desk until it hit his box of cigars. Reaching for it, he flicked out a cigar and lit it. He closed his eyes and let the smoke fill his mouth and his thoughts. 

That could have gone better.

🏝️🏝️🏝️

Shivs watched the morning sun sparkle on the lagoon waters as she leaned back in her patio chair and considered the offer.

“I detect some reservations?” the East Asian woman seated across from her remarked. Her Spanish accent was smooth, her tone persuasive. Shivs’ gaze followed the shift of her long, light hair across her perfectly tanned shoulders, and lingered on the way her airy white tunic hugged her figure.

“I can assure you, it is the type of venture you would enjoy.”

The slam of heavy doors within the penthouse snatched Shivs’ attention just in time to see a furious Robin stalk through the living room, Benji in her wake and gaining.

“I hate you all!” Benji shouted, tears in her eyes as she stormed past them.

Shivs raised an eyebrow at Robin but was met by three middle fingers.

“You two have children?”

Shivs didn’t fail to notice the undercurrent of mockery in the woman’s tone. 

“Do you?”

A pleasant smile appeared on her face, setting a sparkle in her eyes that made Shivs wary. “I have velociraptors.”

Shivs pursed her lips. “Lucky you.”

Robin had been contrary from the day they had found her and was a troublesome teenager on the best of days. However, Benji’s outburst concerned her. She’d said ‘all of you’, not just ‘you’. Which implied she was angry with her father, too. And that happened less than once in a blue moon.

“We will continue this conversation later,” Shivs said as she rose.

“I understand,” the woman said, though Shivs noted her self-satisfied smile.

“Anthony will see you out.”

Appearing on cue as ever, Anthony strode towards the women, carrying their visitor’s stylish coat over his arm. “Ma’am,” he said as he handed it to her.

“Thank you, Mr Daz.”

“This way, ma’am,” Shivs heard him say as she made her way in the direction the girls had come from. The direction of her husband’s office.

🏝️🏝️🏝️

“It’s so unfair!” Benji yelled as she slammed the door to her bedroom, the air displacement sending a rustle through the Jurassic World posters covering most of the walls. Her bed had covers depicting a palaeontology dig from above, and an impressive collection of dinosaur plushies sat all along its length against the wall. A small flatscreen TV stood across from it, its stand buried in documentary DVDs. Beside it, a large doggy hatch and a red water bowl with a bone on it.

Benji dropped herself on her bed and stared at the glow-in-the-dark stars stuck to her ceiling. “She totally wouldn’t be able to tell a Carnotaurus from a Ceratosaurus,” she grumped as the hatch creaked. “I can.”

A nudge against her upper arm.

Benji turned onto her side and reached for the baby Sinoceratops’ shield to draw him towards her. “I hope she falls in every pile of dung she comes across, Stumpy,” she said as she pressed her face against its teal and orange scales.The baby animal warbled softly as it rubbed its stump nasal horn against her side.

“Robin always gets to do things first because,” she said, then mimed a painfully accurate impression of her father’s accent: “she is older”.

“Not because she listens better! Or do her chores!” she said as she sat up. “She never does!”

“It’s so unfair.” Benji wrapped her arms around her knees. “I always do, but I never get things first.”

Stumpy nipped her shin with his beak.

“Ouch, what?” Benji said from above her arms, leaning away from him.

Stumpy flopped down onto the carpet with an offended yip, watching her.

“Oh! I am sorry,” she said as she quickly moved to rub his stump horn. “I got you first. That is totally true.”

Stumpy warbled and licked her cheek, making her chuckle.

🏝️🏝️🏝️

“No, I am busy!” Crocodile called at the knock on his office doors.They opened anyway, revealing the wily shape of his wife.

“Is there any particular reason our daughter just stormed past me, shouting she hates us?” Shivs said as she approached him. Gauging by the impressive cloud hanging in the office, she’d been right about their fight. Stress made him smoke faster.

“She wants to join the first draft of a youth ranger program,” Crocodile said as he motioned at the papers Benji had abandoned on his desk.

Shivs raised an eyebrow.

He turned and pushed the map towards her with two fingers. “On Isla Nublar.”

“And you said ‘no’.”

He took the cigar out of his mouth and pointed at her. “I can’t just let her go play baby ranger on a dinosaur-infested island?”

Shivs came around his desk and leaned against the edge. “One that has upward of 20.000 visitors a day.”

Crocodile leaned back in his seat, taking a draw from his cigar. “The camp is in the island's north, away from the main park.”

She glanced at the map, noted the spot marked ‘camp’. “Less the trouble, I would think?”

He tapped the red marks on the map with the tip of his hook. “It’s practically surrounded by carnivore paddocks. Who knows why?”

Shivs nudged her knee against his. “Well, if they are in paddocks?”

“No. I don’t like it,” he said as she pushed herself off the desk. “They’ve done nothing like this before. They’re kids.”

“As are a good amount of those 20.000 visitors,” Shivs said as she walked around him, putting her hands on his broad shoulders. “If it gets dangerous, we gp and get her.”

“Hrm.”

“She’s becoming a big girl.” Shivs slid her hands under his jacket and rubbed his shoulders, kneading the tight muscles. “Wanting to do her own big girl things.”

Crocodile leaned into her touch, glancing sideways at her. “I do not understand why she is so intent on being the first.”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

A pause as he exhaled the smoke through his nose to not blow it in her face. “Enlighten me.”

“She wants to be known for something, too.” Shivs smiled at his askance look and stroked his cheek. “Like you.”

“It doesn’t matter.” He turned his face away from her hand, annoyed. “This year’s season is a closed draft and its three spots have already been allotted.” Shivs caught the undercurrent of disappointment in his grumble. “It isn’t projected to open to the public until at the earliest next year.”

“Well, that sure is inconvenient,” Shivs said as she kneaded his shoulders until he relaxed. “Who runs it?”

“InGen,” Crocodile said, fingertips idly tracing the back or her hand as it snuck to his collarbone. “Though now a subsidiary of Masrani Global Corporation.”

“Don’t you own significant stock in that company?” Shivs said as she toyed with the gold chain around his neck, warm from resting against his skin all day.

He took her hand and rubbed her knuckles with his thumb. “We do.”

“I thought so,” she said as she leaned against him, wrapping her arms around him. “I am sure you can come to an agreement with Mr Masrani so she can go.”

“No, I don’t want her to go.” Crocodile shook his head, but his grip on her hand tightened. “She’s my little girl.”

“And she’ll always be,” she mused against his cheek. “Let her go,” she added as she pressed kisses against the hard set of his jaw. “She’ll have fun.”

He glanced at her, and she smiled mischievously. “We could go too?” Shivs slid her hands into his dress shirt, her cheek resting against his. “Have a brief holiday, just the two of us,” she added as she let her fingers map the familiar shapes of his pecs. “Take your mind off of everything.”

“That does sound good,” he rumbled, and she could feel the noise under her palms as much as she heard it with her ears.

She chuckled, and they shared a kiss as she gave his right pec a little squeeze.

“It will be.” 

🏝️🏝️🏝️

Crocodile glanced up the stairs in between two bites of his dinner.

“I don't think she's coming down, Habibi,” Shivs said as she rolled up her wrap, pushing the falafel and grilled vegetables spilling out back into it. Beside the table, Stumpy was smacking happily as it ate its bowl of palaeobotanical salad. Normally, Benji would make it, but Crocodile had cut and diced it, this time, unable to ignore the animal's sad yips as it sat by its empty bowl.

Putting his utensils down, Crocodile dabbed his mouth with a napkin before rising. “I will go to her, then.”

Shivs pursed her lips as he picked up the envelope he'd put on Benji's plate when they'd sat down for supper.

Crocodile strode up the stairs two steps at a time and made his way down the corridor that led to the girls their rooms. “Benjamine? I want to talk to you,” he said as he pushed down the door handle to her bedroom. The door didn't budge. She'd locked it.

“Benjamine?”

Nothing but deafening silence. He knew she could hear him because the door had an oversized dog hatch for Stumpy. She was in her room. He could tell from the way heard her move about through to it.

“Benji, baby?” Shivs called as she came down the corridor to stand beside him. “Come on out.”

“I am not hungry,” Benji said from beyond the door, her tone curt and muffled.

“She's still angry,” Crocodile muttered.

‘Told you so,’ Shivs mouthed in Alabastan.

“There's no need to be angry, sweetheart,” Crocodile said, holding up the envelope in an apologetic gesture despite the closed door.

Shivs smiled at the soft but curt noise she caught from behind the door. A little scoff.

‘I have an idea,’ Shivs said softly, beckoning him as she turned away. With a last glance at the closed door, he followed her down the stairs and back into the kitchen.

At the table, Stumpy was chomping down on the last of his salad. Glancing up expectantly when he saw them.

“You want more, little cutie?” Shivs said as she went to the cupboards and retrieved a jar. She cracked it open and grabbed her spoon from the table, scoping up a lump.

“Peanut butter has too much sugar,” Crocodile scolded when he saw her hold out the brown lump. Stumpy did, too, and turned on its stubby legs faster than you'd think possible for such a chunky creature. He galloped to Shivs for a mouthful of the creamy, delicious goo.

“That's why Habibi loves it, don't you,” Shivs cooed as she gave the animal another big spoonful. “Come on, you little lump, this way,” she added as she beckoned it with a third spoon full, luring it up the stairs and towards Benji's room.

“It's going to be sick again,” Crocodile snapped in Alabastan as he snatched a fourth spoon full from her. Stumpy immediately turned to him instead, jumping up to reach it.

“No. Down,” he said firmly as he caught it by the frill and set it back down, drawing an angry nip at his hand for his trouble. “Down,” he repeated, holding its frill steady until it stopped struggling. When it was quiet for a minute, he threw Shivs a look before giving the animal the fourth spoonful. It stepped on his foot as it did so.

“What's the plan, Habibti,” Crocodile muttered.

‘Watch and learn, Wani,’ Shivs mouthed as she took the envelope and used one of her elastic bracelets to tie it to dangle from the hole in Stumpy's frill like a paper earring. She then took the spoon from Crocodile, scooped up another lump of peanut butter and lured Stumpy towards the hatch.

Stumpy happily followed and gobbled up more of the peanut butter.

“In you go,” Shivs whispered, and gave it a shove against its rump to make it walk through the doggy hatch and into Benji's room. With a sharp yip, Stumpy resisted, putting its stubby front legs wide and making them catch against the door frame, stopping her from pushing it in.

“A hand and hook, please?” Shivs complained as she leaned her entire weight against the animal to shove it through.

“We'll hurt its legs!” Crocodile said on a lowered tone as he crouched and tried to push the animal inside, but then noticed the way it had lodged itself. And was staring at the peanut butter jar he was holding. “It wants more of this junk. You two spoil it too mu--.”

Shivs snatched the jar from him, swung her arm like a bowling ball toss and slid the jar across the wood straight towards the doggy door. And Stumpy galloped straight after, skidding and sliding as it tried to catch up to it. The jar zipped past the flap, pursued by the scrambling dinosaur.

Followed by a thud, a thump, and a yelp.

“Stumpy!”

Benji.

Crocodile listened, holding his breath without noticing, trying to hear the tear of paper, of an envelope being opened. Hoping she wouldn't simply crumple it up and toss it in her bin. He flinched when the door suddenly banged open, nearly falling backwards off his haunches and onto his ass. The next moment Benji had flung herself around his neck, the boat ticket clenched in her fist.

She was crying, but not of anger this time. “You're the best dad ever,” Benji sobbed, as she hugged him tight enough with her scrawny little arms to hamper his breathing.

Crocodile wrapped his arms around her, holding his daughter close. “I would bring down the moon to shine only for you, if you wanted me to.”

Shivs smiled, happy they were no longer at odds with each other. It wasn't right. She wanted them to be happy.

After a long moment, Benji pulled back but didn't quite let go of him. “But what about Stumpy?”

Crocodile tucked a bang behind her ear with his hook. “We'll look after him exactly the way you'll tell us to,” he said, then added with a huff: “your mother has already been feeding it peanut butter.”

Benji glanced at Shivs, who shrugged with the peanut butter covered spoon in hand.

“Stumpy loves peanut butter,” Benji grinned.

“He sure does,” Crocodile said, and his tone made them laugh.

🏝️🏝️🏝️

PART II

[staybabblingbaby]

SKZ x Coordi (Chan Part) a1 d4

[Caution: These are not full fics, or even full parts of fics for some, these are part of my writing progress archive!]

Concept: Reader is a successful makeup artist with a notorious and prolific career and no self awareness. Reader joins JYP as a part of Stray Kids' team and encounters their hazing ritual for new coordis: flirting.

Word Count: 640

Notes: This feels more like a drabble than a full part, but I don't really want to add much to it either lol. As everything else, could use some editing for clarity. Maybe better descriptions or transitions? Idk, We'll think abt it later :p

Warnings: None that I know of? Reader has weird self esteem but it's not bad? Reader referred to with She/Her pronouns

Masterlist link :D | Prev Part Link <3 | Next Part Link ;3

The next few weeks pass by in a pattern of work and sleep with no real reprieve. It’s an excellent thing that you enjoy your work and that your coworkers are all very nice.

Ji-Won has you rotating between shadowing the various makeup artists on your team and doing little pieces of whatever look is being put together on each idol. You learn a lot about which shades match best with who’s skin tones and which sorts of styles are generally expected for which member. You don’t think you’ve ever been so thoroughly educated on a specific person’s face before. You’re usually in a whole other country by now.

You get this very thorough rotating education because the role you were hired for was to be a bit of a floater, to fill in where you’re needed. On the other makeup artist’s days off, you’ll be filling in. If someone calls off or the team needs a spare set of hands, that’s your job. You find that it suits you well.

Usually you move pretty quickly between jobs, always on the hunt for the next look, for new knowledge, for new adventures. Right now, though, you’re glad that you’ve stopped a while. Eight lovely faces to gain familiarity with, a variety of different projects to create for, and coworkers who seem very eager to teach and work with you.

You're having a great time and find yourself very glad you'd chosen this route for your career. You will admit that this little game that’s developed between you and the idols is possibly a very large factor.

It stemmed from Han’s little flirtation that first day, of course. The eonni who’d borne witness to it had congratulated you for your composure and explained that SKZ has always had a little game of flustering new coordis to break the ice. Their own form of gentle hazing, she tells you. It helps new coordis not be so nervous around them and, she tells you with a conspiratorial whisper, her personal theory is that it also tells them which coordis they have a chance with. You’re not sure how much you believe that part.

She went on to mention that she was surprised Ji-Won had allowed them to do it though, since your head stylist had been adamant that the whole team be on their best behavior with you. She hadn’t seemed to notice your confusion at her statement, so you chalked it up to Ji-Won doing her best to make the new stylist comfortable. She’d completed her explanation by telling you to expect the other seven to attempt it too before they’d stop.

When, the very next day, Chan prevents you from falling flat on your face and dropping towels everywhere and, like he couldn’t quite help himself, asks if this means you’d fallen for him, you decide that this means war. He immediately bursts into embarrassed giggles and you laugh along but internally you’re planning your retaliation.

As he releases you, still embarrassed with himself, and you steady yourself, you give the most obvious once over you can. As you meet his eyes again, taking in his already embarrassed face and reddening ears, you smile, making sure to lace it with the humor the situation deserves. And then, because you’re a bit of an asshole and you’d never denied that, you gently pat his arm, let the touch linger just a bit, and say “You’re cute. Thanks for the hand.” and walk off with a little nod in his direction before he can remember he’s older than you and technically your boss.

You hear a little pained whimper of embarrassment from behind you and mentally fist pump. Coordis - 2, SKZ - 0. And you’d gotten away with some blatant disrespect just then. It’s always a treat to let social niceties die.

[notaplaceofhonour]

I’m a hyper-self-conscious neurotic freak because I’ve been gaslit so many times about so many things that it’s almost second nature for me to keep thorough receipts & have a manila folder ready to go to back myself up, but sometimes I’m almost glad because it makes me super anal about fact-checking things before saying them publicly on the internet and

I momentarily misremembered something Chappell Roan said at the Gov’s Ball about “occupied territories” (possibly inclusive of Ukraine, potentially reductive if referring to Palestine, but not wholly inaccurate of Gaza & Area C) as something about “stolen land” possibly “no peace on stolen land” (the latter of which would’ve been a pretty clear incitement to violence, would weirdly cut out Ukraine since I’ve never heard anyone say that about Ukraine, and would be difficult to read as anything but a call to destroy Israel & remove Jews), but I wasn’t 100% sure so I doublechecked and yeah no she said “freedom for oppressed peoples in occupied territories”

both glad I have that habit of double/triple-checking before making big swings publicly (@ everyone who keeps libeling Jews: what’s your excuse?) & relieved that I don’t have to check off the “popular music artists who think people I love deserve to die” box for Chappell Roan

[yungvenuz]

Games I Played in 2024 #1: Pâquerette Down the Bunburrows

Genre: Puzzle Game (Evil)

Where: -> Here <-

Pâquerette Down the Bunburrows is a wolf in sheep's clothing. Everything about the premise and outward presentation of the game is cute. The bunnies are cute. The characters are cute. The levels are cute. Then, you try to actually catch a few bunnies and everything goes to hell.

The tutorial lasts for three rooms and explains three basic details of bunny movement behavior:

Bunnies run away if you get too close

Bunnies won't willingly enter a dead end

At intersections, bunnies try to run directly away. If they can't, they attempt to run left first, then right as a final resort

The mechanics governing bunny movement are much, much more complicated than this, but it's up to you to figure out the additional rules.

The brilliance of Down the Bunburrows' design is the way it forces you to solve each puzzle intentionally. Brute forcing a solution simply isn't an option when the decision space is as large as it gets even in early levels. Take this room, in the game's second area:

One bunny trap has been provided, which can be placed on a tile to block the rabbit's path. Exactly one tile in this room can be trapped to successfully catch the rabbit. Many more tiles look like they could work, but the damn rabbit won't enter a corridor it can see ends in a trap, per rule #2, which makes the solution that much more specific. The level designer has done an impressively thorough job of making sure that almost every one of the game's 120+ levels has exactly one correct answer, which is no easy feat given the complexity of the rabbit behavior and the tools given to the player.

To make matters worse, the third area introduces a pickaxe. It's innocuous enough at first- use it to dig a dead end you can catch a rabbit with! Then you realize you can use the pickaxe to burrow into adjacent levels, and horror truly sets in as you find out about Down the Bunburrows' heinously complicated animal husbandry system.

When 2 bunnies collide, they produce a bunny baby. each unique pair of bunnies produces a new bab, and there are more than 500 possible pairings in total. Hunting them down requires a perfect understanding not just of each level in the game, but also of how each level relates to its joining levels, and how to efficiently open paths between them.

If I have any criticisms, it's that the story is fairly barebones. Which shouldn't be that surprising, given the simple premise, but I can't help feeling the imaginative secrets and exploration needed to reach the bottom of the bunburrows could have been put toward something really cool, narratively. This could have been good like Void Stranger is good, is what I'm saying, but instead it's just an extremely rock solid puzzle game that definitely deserves a place next to the greats like Snakebird and Stephen's Sausage Roll.

[awakefor48hours]

What about Azulanette for the ship classification....

Ask Game

ANON I AM KISSING YOU ON THE MOUTH (or whatever form of intimacy you're comfortable with).

I know I'm definitely biased when I say I'd put Azulanette under makes sense and compels me but here's an excuse to talk about it.

First of all Marinette. When it comes to Marinette's love life she has gotten the most characters to fall for her (Adrien, Luka, Nino, Zoe, and Kagami yes, I'm counting her, I refuse to believe Kagami never had a crush on Marinette). But out of all these characters, Adrien has always been "the one" for her and Azula and Adrien do have similar upbringings.

First of all, Adrien's life has been compared to royalty (even though it's usually in a fairy tale setting) and Azula is part of a royal blood line.

Growing up, Adrien had a sheltered life and got a very thorough education (so thorough that his lowest grade ever was an A-) and part of what made Ozai love Azula more is that she was a prodigy.

*Gif taken from this video

As Adrien/as a civilian he has to be an unbreakable image that was meticulously crafted by his dad, like Azula. Everything about Azula has to be "perfect" in every way possible, no just her firebending has to be perfect but her appearance.

As Cat Noir/as a hero, he has the power of destruction and the way that Azula uses her firebending techniques are for destruction/destructive purposes.

You also have the fact that the both of them have poor social skills.

It's easier to remember for Adrien because he's usually talking to other characters (or saying the dreaded "she's just a friend") but Azula is also pretty weird/socially inept and for the same reason as Adrien (she lived a sheltered/away from other kids). The only difference is that Gabriel was trying to make Adrien "perfect" model but Ozai wanted Azula to be the "perfect" soldier (putting quotations around perfect because I don't think perfection exists).

This is another reason why I started gravitating towards Azulanette. As ML goes on, Marinette helps Adrien find courage in himself to start doing things for himself and I can see the same happening for Azula.

Along with Adrien, Marinette also helped Kagami break away from her mom's control and became her first real friend in Ikari Gozen. Then you have Zoe, Zoe was terrified of Chloe so she did her best to be Chloe's carbon copy but after meeting Marinette, she changed. Then you have Adoration, when we see Zoe finally stand up to Chloe.

If given the proper circumstances, this same thing could happen between Azula and Marinette. Azula is a child warrior who spent her life dedicating herself to a war that I don't really think she ever truly believed in. Azula deserves to have a chance to change and be better.

Also, even though there isn't much in the name of Azula's love life, the only love interest Azula has ever had has been Chan but due to her lacking social skills, she sent him away (I want to point out that having poor social skills/coming off too strong wouldn't scare Marinette).

Azula would probably be more attracted to stronger people/people who can protect themselves which is something that Marinette does well. She's the holder of the strongest Miraculous, has worn the most Miraculouses than anyone in history (and she's a kid, so she's only going to get stronger), and she's pretty clever too. I want to again point out that Marinette has gotten several different people to fall for her so Azula can be another one.

Also, they'd be toxic yuri, enemies to lovers, with a red/blue color scheme and because I'm me I love that. So I'd still put them under makes sense and compels me.

[things-keeping-me-up-at-night]

I just finished QuintonReviews video on Dan Schneider (go watch it, seriously: as always, he is very thorough and nuanced in his analysis and I think his way of deep-diving is something that deserves more support).

There is one thing I want to note that I have also commented on the video: his take on the character of Spencer possibly serving as stand-in for Dan Schneider in iCarly (which makes a lot more sense if you watched the video) makes me feel a little more justified in misremembering Spencer and Sam as dating on the show before rewatching it.

Let me explain: funnily enough, I also started rewatching the show a few months before the first part of QuintonReviews’ series came out. I had very blurry memories of the show; I did remember some parts, including the whole Sam and Freddie dating, breaking up, him dating Carly at some point thing, but my head had also put some correct memories together the wrong way.

I mean, sure, there was an episode where Sam moved into the Shays’ apartment and left her underwear lying around the apartment, but for some reason, I thought she was living there for a long time, at least a season, if not the rest of the show.

My brain also merged the ‘Heatwave’ episode and the Coconut Cream Cake episode into one; one of the most clear memories that I had of the show was the moment where Sam climbs into the fridge, except I thought that a) it was because she was eating the last piece of cake and she was trying to hide it, b) she was living in the apartment and c) she was not wearing short pants, but was in fact walking around the apartment in her underwear because that was what I remembered the whole ‘underwear issue’ to be.

Needless to say, remembering the show that way, I was very intrigued to rewatch it because, being a lot older now, I realised that my memories were either false or, if they were even halfway true, this had to have been incredibly edgy for a kids show and I needed to see if it was truly as wild as I remembered. Back to the Sam and Spencer thing: for some reason, I thought that, after Sam and Freddie broke up, not only were Freddie and Carly the main ship for the rest of the show, Sam instead ended up with Spencer, who I didn’t remember was supposed to be in his late twenties to early thirties at that point. Despite not having a specific memory of any romantic interaction between the two, I was convinced that these two dated at least at some point during the show’s run, which, in the context of the kind of show I remembered, didn’t even seem that far out there.

When I began my rewatch though, I quickly realised just how big the age difference between Spencer and the kids was, so I began questioning that memory because surely, it must have been false…but I had been so convinced of it that I thought that, maybe, just maybe, it was true? I mean, the show went on for six seasons, so the kids could have been 18 by the end…and Sam was living with them, maybe her and Carly were of age at that point? And don’t some shows do a time jump? Anyway, I had watched enough other shows about teens to know that these kinds of things have happened on TV…all in all, I wish I could’ve been sure, but I just wasn’t.

So I sat down and watched all six seasons- going into it with the expectation that through some weird development, then-26 year-old Spencer would end up dating then-13 to 14-year old Sam.

And can I just say one thing? It is wild, going into the show that way, how much actually ended up pointing to my assumption being correct. I now know that there used to be an actual (albeit small) shipping community for those two, but like…I really can’t blame my young person’s memory because that ‘ship’ is even canonically addressed and, as seen through an adult’s eyes, the way Spencer interacts with the kids is certainly unusual. I’m not saying the character was up to anything sinister by any means, but I do get why I processed what I was watching in a way that would have allowed for such a relationship to happen: apart from the whole ‘Sam has a crush on Spencer thing’, there were so many instances of what could easily be read (or is explicitly meant as) adults flirting with/being interested in dating minors and vice versa or even just hanging out with them in ways that seem a lot weirder the older you get. Going back to the Sam and Spencer example: one of the reasons why, despite logically knowing a show on a children’s network would not have featured a character who is established as an adult and a character who is established as a very young teenager dating, I was not fully convinced that that wasn’t going to happen for an alarming amount of time watching the show, was that they did hang out one-on-one in a way that I just didn’t know any teenage girl would with the significantly older brother of their friend in real life. Of course, Freddie and Gibby also had many plots alone with Spencer, but at least based on the people I know, innocent same-sex friendships between teenagers and adults are a little more common (though I’m not saying the ones on the show weren’t weird at times either). And while it is uncomfortable to think about their interactions that way, if you’re watching the show through the lens that I did, there is very little to distinguish the dynamic between this adult character and this character who is a minor from dynamics between characters who did end up dating on iCarly or similar shows.

And maybe I’m just weird, but I do think the nature of the relationships between adults and minors that is established in these shows is to blame for my false memory. In rewatching, I expected to immediately disregard that memory as false after remembering the ages of the characters, but up until the very end, even when it was very much confirmed to me that it was a false memory, the show failed to fully convince me that it wasn’t possible for an underage main character and an adult main character to end up together in its universe, which is very telling and (I think) fits the video series’ conclusion perfectly, though that of course puts a lot more factors into consideration.

I doubt anyone, never mind Quinton himself, is going to read all that, but I just wanted to share this since it has been on my mind for years at this point- all in all, my personal experience with rewatching iCarly was good, but very, very weird for this exact reason.

The strangest part was that, in my rewatch, I almost…wanted it to happen? Not because I genuinely thought it would be a good thing, more because I became so invested in figuring out if I was gaslighting myself or if there had really been such truly unhinged children’s programming just a few years back. And again, there was a disturbing amount of things in the show (at least kind of) backing my feeling up. The only comfort I have is knowing that I’m not the craziest Sam/Spencer theorist to have ever graced the internet: in trying to figure out why I remembered their relationship the way I did, I dove deeper into the whole ‘Spam ship’ (yes, that was a thing) than probably anyone ever should…long story short, if anyone reading this wants to go on a really wild ride check out this blog post:

(Please note that I did not put that last paragraph or the link in my YouTube comment, but I felt like if there was any place to share this internet relic I found, it would be Tumblr.)

[mirielwebster]

What better way to get started than with Fire Emblem's favourite word, dastard, which appears in just about every game, be it officially or unofficially translated? This shot in particular is from the new (fan)translation of FE4, but it was present in the older one as well. Fans often seem to assume it's just a butchering of "bastard" (for ratings reasons) without realising that it is a real word with a real meaning.

( "Implore" is also a possible candidate, and perhaps also "adore" and "undercut" as well if you want to be thorough. )

An Emblematic starting word, indeed!

Fire Emblem's relationship with pejoratives is an interesting one, and while dastard is definitively a distinct word from bastard, I do think there is a relationship between the use of old-timey insults and the need or desire to keep things "Nintendo-friendly." It was rare to see even a damn in the first localized games, and part of the way localization circumvented this was to have the characters use epithets that sounded... well, medieval. Hence your craven!s and your cur!s and, if you're feeling extra spicy, your craven cur!s. I'm actually hard-pressed to recall a usage of dastard in at least FE7 (which was fond of blackheart in similar circumstances); maybe the ESRB thought it was a little too close to the B-word for comfort.

Of course, as the series settled comfortably into a consistent "T for Teen" rating, sensibilities surrounding language loosened up. Awakening was the first game to see characters swearing on a fairly regular basis— up to and including bastard with a B! Yet we still see dastard often enough in modern FE games, which should put to rest the notion that it's merely a euphemism for a more offensive term. They're used differently, and that boils down to both meaning and tone.

(This is where I was initially going to expound on bastard, but just as that section of the post was getting to be too long, an angel of mercy sent an Ask for that very word. So stay tuned, all you beautiful bastards.)

Kidnapping is, of course, Dastardry 101.

So, what exactly does it mean to be a dastard? Merriam-Webster gives two definitions: 1) “coward,” and 2) “a person who acts treacherously or underhandedly.” 

While people do seem to assume dastard as it appears in FE is a willful typo, I’d wager most of you have actually heard its adjectival form: dastardly! Yes, that’s an adjective, not an adverb, despite the -ly ending— same with words like friendly and unsightly.

If the context hasn’t made it clear by now, these words are practically synonymous with villainy. But we’re not just talking any old villain: the key word in the above definitions is underhanded. Dastard carries the sense of cowardice with it because it’s associated with backstabbing, behind-the-scenes scheming, sneak attacks, and just generally dirty tactics. Arguably the most famous “dastard!” in Fire Emblem is directed toward Arvis in Genealogy of the Holy War, and it’s patently well-deserved. And even though Chagall in the asker’s provided screenshot might be projecting juuust a little bit, he actually does well to give us some context clues, as he accuses Eldigan of getting close to his father in order to get one over on Chagall— which, if it were true, would certainly qualify as underhanded. Not as underhanded as murdering your peace-loving king and father, maybe, but who’s to say.

So while modern audiences will sooner associate this word with being a villain than with merely being a coward, it’s important to note that not every villain is a dastard. Your big, strong, honest warlord types— Walhart, for instance— are generally not going to be very dastardly. Neither are your force-of-evil gods and monsters… after all, who needs trickery and deception when you can turn your foes to stone, incinerate them with your breath, or simply eat them? And while yes, dastard and bastard are different words, one commonality you might have noticed is how male-gendered they both are in practice. Nothing whatsoever is stopping a woman from being a dastard, but it’s unlikely she’ll ever be called one. 

As for the other words:

Implore basically means beg, though it implies a little more dignity. Rather than falling to your knees, folding your hands, and crying a lot, you need a more strategic and sophisticated approach when imploring. Eldigan’s completely sincere in his desire to put a stop to Chagall’s warmongering, but he doesn’t lower himself upon asking.

Adore means love, especially in a worshipful or fawning way. While it can still be used in an earnest way, it's just as often tinged with condescension, implying disdain for the adorer, the adoree, or both. I’m not sure when adorable came to be synonymous with cute, but I think there’s an intentional hyperbole in that usage that became lost as it became common. Chagall may likewise be hyperbolizing, intent as he is upon framing Eldigan as… well, a manipulative dastard. Having already learned his true feelings toward his father, what's meant to communicate sympathy for the king to Eldigan rings hollow and ironic to the audience.

Undercut as used here means the same as undermine, which is to weaken or make useless via subtle or covert means. It’s all very underhanded… or shall we say, dastardly. Undercut does have more of an association with direct competition or rivalry, though, which gives the sense that part of this may be personal to Chagall.

Well, I think that covers everything! Tune in next time, when we discuss dastard’s edgier, PG-13 cousin. Oh yes, I was serious.

[tarot-by-e11e]

Hi. This is my feedback for your "Encouraging Messages from your Higher Self" game.

First of all, thank you for this reading. Second, I think this is one of the few times I got a glimpse of my higher's self more comedic side? I'm not saying her advices for me are funny, but with the statements I read, she really is my higher self. Sarcastic and witty, but still caring. There were some statements where I couldn't help but laugh because of how much they reasonate.

I'm pretty sure me being adventurous would require me travelling. I also interpreted this as continuing to write my book but a lot of possibilities are entering my mind. I love how she's playing mind games with me <33

She also called me out with me being delusional about people not liking me and dreaming BIGGER than what I could ever imagine. I've always known that I'm meant for greatness but sometimes, acting on it makes me have second thoughts. She also picked up on my current situation right now. I am currently in a situation where I don't know which changes will come and most of them are not the most positive ones. I'll admit, it did affect me and made me question all the success I feel coming in my life but I still push myself. Weirdly enough, I can't seem to stop just pushing myself through more at the moment. However, I appreciate this reminder of hers.

This also proves I have a strong tendency to be a workaholic and not to forget my worth and self-care because of that. Like, yes girl, I also consciously aim to choose a partner who supports and grows with me. We don't need any man child in this house who'll just drag us down.

ALSO CAN I JUST SAY HOW FREAKY IT IS WHEN YOU MENTIONED ME TO SEARCH THOSE TWO THINGS 😭 At first, I didn't understand why there was that statement. I even searched wrong the first time, but the next time I did, I realize these two are books. Well, one is also a concept but there's a book about it. This just clicked for me since as someone who lacks connections atm, I consider books as mentors and my higher self was so scarily accurate and helpful with this one!!! I'll research more about it 🥰

And yes, I'll listen to her. I'll cut off these deadweight people in my life. Right away. I've also been told before that lots of people think I'm just nobody but things are about to change and everyone will be so shocked about it.

Well...let's surprise them, I guess?

Thanks again for this 🥰

Hi dear,

Thank you for taking the time to sending me a thorough feedback of your reading~

I'm really grateful I was able to showcase to you a different side of your Higher self~

Yes do let me know once you publish your book!

It's okay to work hard just don't overdo it, okay?

Yup, she's just reminding you to always balance your routines and schedules~

Yesss! Choose your life partner wisely and responsibly! Children can't choose who they have as parents~

Lol, those two things were such a shocking revelation even for me. I was like, why would your Future Self mention that? But yeahhhh I'm really glad it resonated with you a lot.

YESSSSSSS please cut off all deadweight!! You deserve better!