#words of affirmation is. v obviously important to me too now that i think of it

[buckyownsmylife]

v e l o c i t y - chapter vi

The one where John’s your true mate, but he doesn’t want you to be his.

In a universe where fate grants you a new mate whenever you lose yours, John has lived quite comfortably for many years with the knowledge that he was alone after Mary. That all comes crumbling down the second that he meets you. How could the universe choose someone so young to be his omega?

for general warnings and author’s notes, please go to the fic’s masterlist.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Things changed ever since that night at the bar, even if in all the ways that mattered, they were still pretty much the same. John still didn’t claim me and seemed resolute in never doing it,  but I knew something very important now.

I knew that he actually desired me. And that important information changed everything for me. His indifference was hurtful, and it ignited the flames of spite inside my bratty omega body. But knowing that he actually was affected by me made me even more determined to get any sort of reaction from him. And I could tell that now that his resolve had been broken once, it was even easier to get him to snap again.

“Good morning!” I sang as he and the boys joined me in the kitchen, having already prepared the coffee and was now flipping pancakes to feed their insane hunger. “Have you slept well?”

Dean and Sam answered affirmatively, but John only grumbled. I knew he was trying very hard not to stare at my ass on the tiny sleeping shorts I was still wearing.

“There you go,” I offered them the plate with the mountain of pancakes and stepped away as each of them collected theirs, so I wouldn’t lose a finger in the process. Thankfully, they were polite enough to leave me at least three so I could join them for breakfast. “Is there any reason for you to be staring at me?” I asked, obviously directing my question to John, whose gaze I could feel burning my body, despite my focus being 100% on my own plate. 

The situation reminded me too much of the morning after we met, and it was hard to keep the smile off my face.

“I’m trying to understand who the hell would put on makeup right after they woke up. And can’t I look at you anymore? Why are you smiling like that?” A giggle escaped my lips, finally raising my eyes to see his furrowed eyebrows and just how overall irritated he looked at absolutely nothing.

“Can’t I smile anymore?” I parroted his response, and that earned me a growl. “Wow, you’re very easily annoyed this morning. What’s wrong? Is your rut coming up?” That seemed to be the wrong thing to say, if the way he almost broke his mug when putting it back on the table was any indication. “Jesus, calm down… For your information, I’m not even wearing any makeup.”

Instead of angry, John paled at my words, freezing for a second with his eyes wide before leaving all at once. I had to blink a few times to process the unexpected turn of events before I could look at the boys for some sort of explanation.

Still, neither of them looked as confused or startled by John’s sudden outburst as me. Dean was even chuckling to himself, attention completely dedicated to his food as he said, to no one in particular, “You two bicker like teenagers… or an elderly couple that’s been married for years.”

That comment kinda hurt, because it made me realize that there was a gigantic probability of me never having that actual future with him. So I turned to Sam, hoping he would distract me from my sad thoughts and provide me with some answers.

“Do you know what this is about?” He frowned when he noticed I was talking to him, like he wasn’t expecting my question. But then he noticed the genuine confusion on my face, and he seemed to understand that I really didn’t know what was going on.

“Oh, I thought you had picked up on it,” he commented, swallowing a huge bite of pancakes. “He really is nearing his rut. That’s why he’s acting this way, and that’s why your presence is that much more aggravating to him.”

The explanation was surprisingly a shock to me. Despite my teasing, I never actually thought that was the reason for his prickly behavior, and now that I knew what it was, I couldn’t help but to be concerned for him.

“Shouldn’t he be out there, looking for someone to help him get through it?” I asked, even if the thought of John with another woman killed me. I could only imagine the sort of pain an Alpha went through when they had to survive a rut on their own. And even if I didn’t understand why he didn’t want to claim me, I would never wish him to hurt.

I remembered just how bad my first heat had been. It was the only one I’d faced until now, the one where it became clear I was in fact an omega, and since I wasn’t prepared, I spent the most terrible three days dehydrating in my own room, getting by with just my own fingers and toys, until it subdued just enough to let me get some water and food into my system.

Omegas weren’t meant to go through heats alone, just as Alphas weren’t, either.

“He’s been going through them by himself ever since mom died.” My eyes grew the size of the plate in my hands, I was sure of it, just as my mouth hung open to stare at the man in front of me. He started laughing at my reaction but still somehow kept on swallowing down his food.

“What? You think he’d just bring a random chick into the bunker? Especially now that you’re here? No way. He’d never disrespect you like that.” The fact that Sam just knew that his father would take my feelings into consideration overwhelmed me. I didn’t know what to say, so I silently excused myself to wash the dishes and go back into my room.

“Damn, it’s hot,” I thought to myself as I looked at the sweatpants I’d planned to change into and decided to keep the shorts I was currently wearing. “Wonder if there’s a heatwave coming our way.”

[baodurs]

i want someone besides me and the 2 friends who know all the lore to meet my detective, but i’m too impatient to let you get to know her via fic so i filled out this questionnaire instead. she is veronica and she is so important, here is some stuff about her if you are interested :’)

QUICK READ OF YOUR DETECTIVE

Name: veronica langford

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: bi

Love interest: adam

Best friend: morgan

Main skill: science/technology

Secondary skill: combat/physical

Main personality trait: impulsive

Secondary personality trait: sarcastic

Why did they join the Wayhaven PD?: best use of her science skills

Relationship with Rebecca: not great

Relationship with Bobby: ex, finds it hard to be around him

Verda or Tina?: both! but she’s on verda’s branch

Murphy bite?: wrist

Murphy's fate?: captured

Rescue LI or Rescue Sanja?: sanja

GENERAL

Name: veronica “it’s been 3 years and i never gave her a middle name” langford

Nickname: just veronica. people around wayhaven called her ronny growing up, and a few still do despite her trying to grow out of it. maybe a few people from college and sometimes tina call her v or vee or something.

Birthday: please you all know i am so scared of concrete dates

Age: 26

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: bi

Hair color: brown

Eye color: dark brown

Height: 5′10 (178 cm)

Piercings: just one in each ear

Tattoos: something retro sci-fi on her shoulder. not a reference to anything specific, but like a little planetary landscape with a UFO in the background or something.

Clothing Style: casual. lots of tank tops and muscle tees (weather- and occasion-permitting), concert t-shirts, warm colors. flannels and leather jackets. jeans, sneakers, combat boots. think like rocker chick vibes, but cozier and more colorful.

Apartment Style: basic. she really did not plan on living there long and kept putting off decorating because it’d be a waste if she was just going to move out. this rationalization went on so long but since the end of book 1 she has slowly bought a few things to push it towards “cozy,” still pretty sparse though.

STATS

Personality:

Charming | Intimidating

Impulsive | Cautious

Sarcastic | Genuine

Friendly | Stoic

Easygoing | Stubborn

Traits:

Heart | Mind

Optimist | Pessimist

Team Player | Independent

Skills:

Main Skill: science/technology (but mostly science)

Second Skill: combat/physical

By the Book | Bend the Rules

KEY DECISIONS

Reason for joining the Wayhaven PD: best use of her science skills

Murphy bite:  Wrist | Neck | None

Murphy’s Fate: Captured | Escaped

Rescued: Love Interest | Sanja

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP

Love Interest: adam

Why them?: for veronica it’s kind of retroactive. the way i imagine their True Canon, they don’t have any real romantic moments in book 1, so she doesn’t seriously consider that adam might have feelings for her until well into book 2. (the training scene is when she’s like “oh. ok. i get it now.”) even then it takes a few more chapters for her to really process that, figure out how she feels, and recontextualize everything. like realizing that he loves her and then thinking back on their relationship, knowing that, makes her feel so held (sorry i have no better way to say it) in a way that just makes her want to cry.

to give some actual specific reasons, it’s his dedication and his constancy and hidden care/softness. and his very specific brand of... selflessness might be just left of the word i’m looking for, but hopefully you get me.

Bold, shy, or mixed?: neither! in theory it’s closer to bold, but it’s more just earnest.

What were their first impressions of each other?: disastrous. on top of finding him condescending and unpleasant, there are also a few moments where veronica genuinely wonders whether he’s even a good person. or, like, cares about people. but once she learns the truth of things, a lot of her initial anger gets transferred to rebecca.

adam, with the benefit of knowing what’s actually happening, has a slightly more favorable impression of veronica. yes he thinks she’s difficult and reckless and too emotionally driven, yes she’s making his job absolutely miserable, but he does begrudgingly respect that her accusations are always on the right track and she’s good at her job.

What do they find attractive about each other, mentally or physically?:

for veronica: she loooves his sense of humor. and how much faith he has in the people he cares about. physically, dimples <3. but everything about his smile really. and his nose!

for adam: veronica has a very blunt, unadorned sense of kindness to her that he really loves. the way she is kind before she is nice and values directness. physically, her eyes, they’re deep brown and so expressive.

What do they do to spend time together?: they’re both competitive so anything where they can compete on the same team is fun. (competing against each other is fun too, but also like. exhausting. for them and everyone.) maybe puzzles or other things where it feels like they’re “winning” or solving something together. i have spent an embarrassing amount of thought on veronica and overw*tch esp*rts and she would absolutely make adam learn how to play main tank so they could queue as a tank duo. but most of the time i think they don’t Do specific things together; they just hang out. just talk with each other. perhaps snuggle.

What is their favorite memory together?: in current canon... lol. veronica really just treasures any time adam relaxes around her but those moments always get Ruined. even once they’re well into a relationship, i think veronica’s favorite memory would still be something small like a random time he said something funny and they both laughed together and they were outside and the sky was pretty.

What are their love languages?: acts of service for both of them, but especially adam. veronica... probably lots of words of affirmation and physical touch. they’re both bad at blocking out time for themselves in the first place, so quality time can get neglected especially at first.

How do they handle being apart from one another?: pretty well i think! once they’re in an established relationship at least, before that it’s probably harder. but adam can distract himself with work, and veronica is good at focusing on whatever’s in front of her (whether that’s work or she’s away on vacation or something). if neither of them is too busy, veronica calls every night and they stay on a while, half talking and half just keeping each other company.

Do they argue? How do they handle arguments and disagreements? How do they make up?: i think arguments are fairly rare! yes they’re both insanely stubborn, but they also understand each other pretty well (especially once in a relationship) and are very sympathetic to where the other is coming from. unless both of them are extremely stressed, one of them crumbles when they start genuinely arguing like "i don't want to fight ok, let's take a second."

What does their future look like?: who knows! i haven’t decided whether veronica will turn. i think she probably will, just because i do not want my main pairing for this IF to make me very sad all the time, but like. i’m not fully committing until i see a reason pop up in canon. as of book 3′s final demo, it’s not on her radar at all; she knows she loves adam and wishes they could Talk, but ultimately doesn’t expect or even want a relationship right now (because she doesn’t want to deal with dating one of rebecca’s agents OR with the logistics of being in a committed relationship with an immortal being). it’s just all so foreign to her current state of mind that it’s really hard to say!

Anything else you'd like to share: do you know how hard it was to answer some of these considering veronica wasn’t sure they were even, like, on decent terms for such a large portion of the canon content

BEST FRIEND RELATIONSHIP

Best friend: morgan and farah are essentially joint besties but i’ll go with M

Why them?: i think they appreciate each other’s no bullshit attitude. morgan likes that veronica doesn’t take herself too seriously and respects/relates to the way she tackles problems (quickly, head-on, and without complaint but also without pretending that it doesn’t suck?). veronica appreciates morgan’s bluntness, likes bantering with her, and in general just likes being around people that have quiet/steady presences.

What were their first impressions of each other?: neither of them had much of a first impression honestly. morgan barely thought of veronica at all beyond “she’s annoying,” and kept to herself so much that any dislike veronica had of morgan took a backseat to her dealing with the rest of unit bravo.

What do they do to spend time together?: lots of just sitting in the same room and listening to (low volume) music, veronica spends a lot of time hunting for songs morgan might like. morgan is also her go-to sparring/training buddy. and there are semi-frequent movie nights where veronica shows farah her favorite old shitty B movies, and sometimes morgan will tag along just to sit in the room with them or affectionately talk shit.

Anything else you'd like to share: i’ll talk a little about N! obviously veronica and nate respect, trust, and like each other, but she finds him the hardest of UB to connect with. they’re both people who wear their compassion on their sleeves but keep a lot of their hearts/themselves held back, so they just kind of circle each other, especially since like... nate values politeness and is very sweet in how he relates to people, while veronica values directness and is more jokey/lighthearted to put people at ease. idk how well i’m communicating this; as of the book 3 demo it’s getting easier, but their friendship is still newer/more... nebulous? than the others.

OTHER RELATIONSHIPS (Feel free to go in depth!)

Relationship with Rebecca: so strained. veronica has come to terms with rebecca’s absences throughout her childhood, but there’s newer resentment over... a lot of things, but how she handled the murphy case especially. veronica hates being kept in the dark, and even more than that she hates being rebecca’s priority. it’s difficult to reconcile her childhood and present images of rebecca, and she’s angry that rebecca is so freely and recklessly choosing her, now, to the point of endangering others if she has to, especially when she never felt like rebecca’s choice before. and incredibly frustrated/confused by how often the lines between their professional and familial relationships are blurred and what rebecca actually wants from her.

Relationship with Rook: veronica takes after rook a lot. in stat terms, the only trait they don’t share is stoic, and even then that’s veronica’s least extreme stat. people always told her how like her father she was growing up, and it’s a comparison she took/takes a lot of pride in! she looks up to him based on the stories, but more recently is uncomfortable with the comparisons. veronica would never have even come back to wayhaven if her life panned out as planned, let alone become a detective or joined the agency. that makes her doubt herself, and she feels like that doubt is letting rook down somehow.

rook is also part of the reason her relationship with rebecca isn’t as bad as it could be. she knows that rook loved her, and that he would want his family to be there for each other, so she feels obligated to at least try to make things better. but it’s really hard for her to move past everything to connect with rebecca (which also makes her feel like she’s disappointing rook).

Relationship with Bobby: they were together for a long time and veronica thought she loved him a lot! it was her first relationship, so she wasn’t sure a) what a “bad partner” looked like, or b) how to even be in a relationship or rely on someone in that way. so they spent a lot of time together and had great superficial chemistry, but veronica didn’t have enough experience with not feeling neglected to realize how shallow it was, or notice the red flags when she did occasionally open up. the plagiarism fiasco was a slap in the face, especially because it cost her internships/grad school apps/whatever, i don’t have the details, and forced her to move back to wayhaven after school. she’s still very hurt by it and finds it hard to be around bobby.

Relationship with Verda: due to the above plagiarism fiasco, veronica was pretty depressed when she moved back home, and disliking her job didn’t help. she was extremely jealous when verda was hired and wanted to hate him. but it did not take long for that to crumble into respect/admiration, and eventually into close friendship! verda is a role model for her; they bond over science; they joke easily and have good chill fun. she was really excited to see him piecing together the truth about the supernatural and then devastated to see how he reacted. she feels insanely guilty and thinks it was selfish of her to let him figure it out, but is also cautiously optimistic about making it up to him as of the book 3 demo.

Relationship with Tina: very close! veronica isolated herself when she came back to wayhaven after school, and she is so grateful to tina for being her closest friend and link to the rest of the world during that time. hates keeping the supernatural from her, though. she didn’t like lying to tina to begin with, but she feels even worse about it now that verda knows, and now that tina has clearly picked up on something being wrong but she still can’t say anything.

Relationship with the Mayor: cannot stand him. hates the way he talks about rook, hates the way he talks to rebecca. she cooperates as necessary but doesn’t bother hiding her lack of patience/respect for him.

Relationship with Capt. Sung: basically fine. i think veronica might be a little too casual for him in the way she works, but she always gets the job done so he’s not too bothered by it. (she is ‘bend the rules,’ but more ‘strict rules aren’t important as long as you’re still doing good work’ than the ‘boooo fuck paperwork’ variety. so it’s mostly fine.) she also appreciates him as a minor link to rook.

Relationship with Haley: very friendly, but not super close. they get along great and could make pleasant conversation for hours, but ultimately don’t know each other super well despite the familiarity of growing up together.

Relationship with Elidor: such a comforting presence for veronica during her recovery! she is so grateful, so fond.

Relationship with Tapeesa/Vieno: veronica loves vieno’s cranky-yet-friendly vibe and they get along well! not close, but will stop to chat whenever they pass each other.

Relationship with Unit Alpha: loves their energy. always looks forward to the next opportunity to chat with them, and fully supports any harmless dunking on UB even if she rarely joins in.

Relationship with the Maa-alused: going through the house of mirrors and then coming home for them to appear in her apartment and infect bobby was one of thee worst experiences of her life, and it’s hard for her to get past that + the illness in general. sympathizes with them, and got them to sign the treaty, but is still kind of unsettled by everything that happened and by falk.

Do they have any other important relationships, past or present? (Relatives, friends, etc.?): some vague figures i have in mind but no one i’ve really developed. a couple friends from college, and maybe an elderly couple that lives on her childhood street and used to check in her.

PERSONAL BIO

Describe their personality: her usual demeanor is very warm and casual. sincere but private--she’s pretty blunt and likes to be direct with people, but steers conversations away from personal topics. likes to joke around and doesn’t take herself that seriously. but behind all this, she’s extremely stubborn and won’t shy away from conflict if she thinks you’re in the wrong (which is why she seems like a different person in the first half of book 1. UB is surprised by how like... chill and nice she is once they clear the air). a workaholic, self-reliant and secure but still pretty hard on herself, takes a lot of responsibility for the people around her.

Strengths: so dedicated. honest and trustworthy, has a strong moral compass and can always be counted on to do her absolute best. flexible and intuitive, her brain works really fast.

Weaknesses: cannot compartmentalize or separate herself from a case, throws herself so recklessly into everything (in terms of both physical danger and emotional burnout). doesn’t necessarily hold grudges but has a hard time letting go of hurt, still can’t think objectively about bobby or rebecca.

Where in the world is their Wayhaven?: somewhere on the US east coast idk what to tell you. perhaps a carolina or a virginia.

What is their personal history?: veronica was pretty social and well-liked around wayhaven growing up. she was known as just a really good kid; she was an overachiever and got along with almost anyone. in college, she felt like she was free of something and took a very work hard/play hard approach to life. always doing or going, whether it was for school or work or fun. she really enjoyed life during this time but crashed and burned pretty hard when she and bobby broke up; a lot of her plans were delayed until the plagiarism incident was resolved and she didn’t really have the heart to pursue them afterwards.

a year or so after graduating, she returned to wayhaven with the intention of taking one more year to regroup, and she has been stuck there longer than she meant to be and has kind of hit a wall when book 1 starts.

If they weren't a detective, what would their dream job be?: she was on track to become a biochemist and it was her dream job but then the main plot happened to her.

Anything else you'd like to share: i don’t really know enough to fully explain this, but no OC i love is a cop so like. i think maybe the job she took when she got back to wayhaven was a douglas-esque receptionist role for detective reele’s private office. then reele retired and small town politics + veronica’s history of useful contributions to cases in her downtime at work led to her being pressured to take up the mantle. it’s hard to explain why she’s a detective when she so deeply does not want to be one but i am Trying (or maybe she would have jumped at the chance to do something marginally closer to forensics?? who knows)

RANDOM FACTS

Zodiac sign: aries is what i assigned her when i first made her and i think it suits her! plus it’d be fun for her and M to be twins. this goes hand-in-hand with my birthday commitment issues though

Hobbies: music (she plays guitar and bass and sings a little), running, gaming unfortunately. i could also see her having been into boxing or some martial art but idk what exactly!

Likes: early morning stillness, DIY projects, t-shirts with inexplicable slogans and other weird thrift store finds

Dislikes: overly sweet food or drink, when cold weather lasts too long, being lied to or “protected” from the truth

Drink of choice: something with gin maybe. also feels a great fondness and gratitude for cheap wine.

Starbucks order: i truly know nothing about coffee. is it weird to order black coffee at starbucks

Favorite food: variations on spicy chicken soup! she eats a lot of crockpot meals for convenience and they’ve grown on her, and she has a few different recipes based on whatever she has on hand.

Favorite color: maybe like a rusty orange

Favorite music: she will listen to anything, but her favorite is probably folk rock, or sometimes stuff with soul or old school country vibes. big thief is a good example of an artist she’d be into i think! also was very into the indie music scene in her college town and still follows some of those bands.

Favorite genre (and favorite movie/book/etc): loves old, campy, unselfconsciously optimistic sci-fi. loves star trek tos. also a fan of documentaries of all kinds.

Favorite season: summer

Anything else you'd like to share: a kiss for you reading this mwah

[peachywise]

nullify

an umbrella academy fanfiction // klaus hargreeves x reader 

- part 6: the beginning of understandings || part i ⋆ part ii ⋆ part iii ⋆ part iv ⋆ part v ⋆ more to be released 

- synopsis: It was finally time to meet the bringer of the apocalypse– a petite girl wrapped up in a blanket drinking tea. Totally chill. Nothing unusual about the situation at all. At least Klaus was consistent with his irritating commentary.

- note: my bad sorry i haven’t updated in so long!! but i’m back! and since season 2 is now out, please just note that this story is my own continuation of the story after season 1. also, i am no longer doing a tag list. honestly i just can’t be bothered, and i’m sure most of the blogs have changed since the last one for this series. i post on ao3, so you can subscribe to the story there!! 

link on ao3 

_______________________________________

Okay. So you were going to face the person who allegedly caused the apocalypse. No big deal. This was just a normal day, and she was just a girl. Albeit one who had undergone pretty severe trauma in her life, but hey. Nothing you couldn’t handle with a pleasant smile and a cup of tea, right?

Maybe the tea was a bad idea. But you felt like you needed a peace offering. Something to break the ice before asking someone who was relatively a complete stranger, “I think I can contain your powers, so why don’t we try? Also, why don’t you move into my apartment for the time being? I promise the occasional cockroach that comes out the drain won’t do any harm. It would be nice if he paid rent, but I can’t complain.”

Yeah. Just a normal day.

An abrupt tap on your shoulder and Klaus’s breath tickling the side of your neck forced your eyes away from your previous stare down with the white bedroom door, and any and all courage you’d built up to walk in quickly dissipated.

“Hey, you think if this whole—” his voice caught on a sharp intake of breath as he tried to find his words, his hands rolling, “trying to convince my sister to not start the second apocalypse by moving in with you thing doesn’t work out, I can still crash there? You can’t begin to imagine just how stifling it is here. I don’t even think Five has changed out of his little uniform in a week, let alone had a shower. You smell so much better. Like vanilla with a bit of stale coffee and deep-seated cynicism.”

Turning your face fully towards his, your noses almost touching by how close he had leaned in, you kept your expression passive. And then you tipped your hand to let half of the scalding tea fall over the lip of the cup and on his bare feet.

As Klaus jumped back, hopping between his feet and hollering a string of “ow, ow, ow,” you took a small step back and replied with a drab and mocking, “that has to hurt.”

Klaus gave a curt laugh that was almost lost, given his teeth were clenched in pain. “You know, I don’t know if I like your violent style of foreplay.”

“You’re making it very clear why Vanya destroyed the world in the first place, Klaus,” you responded, voice raised. “You haven’t even experienced just how sadistic I can be. I can turn around right now and just let her cause the second apocalypse again.”

“How original of you, threatening to leave. What is it, the tenth time already? Maybe if we’re all lucky, you can get a couple more in before dinner!”

“You know what’s original? Your desperate need for attention because you never got any from daddy as a kid. I’ve never seen that before-“

The door opened in front of you, and someone’s soft cough had you and Klaus both turning in their direction.

Allison Hargreeves.

“Are you guys done?” She questioned, a tight impatient look crossed on her features. At a loss for words, partly embarrassed now that you’d raised your voice, you tried to find anywhere to look but her eyes. Your gaze ultimately got caught on her neck, and the healed, puffy scar raised on her skin. Right. They’d mentioned Vanya had injured Allison. Pretty horribly at that. You remembered what you were nervous about in the first place.

“Allison, this is Y/N, though they will reply to trouble or travel-sized Satan just as well,” Klaus offered, slipping past his sister, who stood fully in the frame of the doorway.

Reaching behind to scratch your neck, you forced a timid smile on your face and gave a small wave with your free hand. “Hey. Nice, uh… place you got here.” Totally casual. “Very clean.” Not awkward at all.

Allison snorted. “Uh-huh. Nice to meet you. Let’s see if this was all worth it, shall we?”

Straight to the point. You could respect that. Nodding, you kept the nervous smile on your face as you walked past her after she sidestepped away from the door. You didn’t really know what you were expecting. Part of you thought the room was going to be some weird pit of despair. Dark and broody, like it was supposed to set the scene for some comic book character about to delve into their villain origin story.

But nope. It was just a standard bedroom, very well lit, white linen, clean carpet. The only thing that really stood out was the sunny yellow blanket wrapped tightly around a petite frame huddled on the single bed, a sky blue polka dot teacup clutched in both of her hands.

Well, now you didn’t feel so bad that you’d poured out basically all the tea you were going to give Vanya on Klaus.

“I’m guessing you’re Vanya?”

No shit, she was Vanya. You literally knew what she looked like.

You shuffled your feet awkwardly as the girl’s eyes flickered up to you. You still had the teacup in your hand.

“I brought you this, but I… spilled a little,” you commented off-handily, moving over to set it on a small side table.

Klaus made a notably shocked look. “Is that what you call a little?”

Vanya nodded her head once, her tone quietly gruff as she added, “we could hear you through the door.”

Allison offered a very helpful, “I’m sure the whole apartment floor heard them.”

Klaus, unable to contain himself from continuing this rally of comments, added, “well, it’s not the only time my screams have woken up someone next door. Certainly won’t be the last, God hoping the world doesn’t explode again.”

All three of you groaned. Good to know you weren’t the only one exhausted.

“It’s nice to meet you, Vanya. Did they explain to you why I’m here?” You asked, moving closer to the girl in question.

Vanya’s eyes glanced quickly over to Allison, who nodded her head in encouragement. She then turned to look at you once more and gave a slight jerk of her head in affirmation. Despite what had happened between Vanya and Allison, you could see the trust between the sisters. You might have gotten the story of what happened three months prior, but obviously they had worked out some stuff. At least a little bit. “Yeah. Yeah, Five uhm, gave me the gist of it,” Vanya replied, her voice still quiet with an edge of hesitance.

“It really works,” Klaus stated, looking at you with a joyful look. “Not seeing Ben’s ugly mug for once…” he pressed his hands to his heart and contentedly sighed, “it was the biggest blessing one could have given me.” His serene mood quickly dissipated as he looked to an empty corner and bit out a tight, “zip it, ghoul boy.”

“I don’t know,” Vanya carried on, as Klaus and presumably Ben continued to have an argument in the back. “Our powers are different. I don’t know if I want to take the risk of using it again in case it doesn’t work.”

You sighed, and Allison brought her hand up to nervously to chew on a nail. Moving to sit on the edge of the bed, you tried your best to settle the situation. Yeah, the money you would get for this would be nice, but you could tell this all went beyond that. It was important. You knew they wouldn’t have just let you into their inner circle if it wasn’t.

“I get it. What happened was awful, but you aren’t in that place anymore, right? Panic makes you do stupid shit. You aren’t you when you’re in such a crisis. That doesn’t mean you don’t take accountability for those actions, but the you sitting here isn’t actively trying to blow up the moon and cause the end of the world.” Peering over to Klaus, who stood grumpily off to the side, you asked, “it was the moon, right?”

His attention quickly fixed on you as he replied back, “oh yeah,” making a sudden explosion movement with his hands and horrible sound effects to go with it.

Allison’s blunt, “Klaus,” was enough to quickly shut him up.

“But I could panic again,” Vanya pleaded, her hazel eyes cutting in their pain. As stable and as comfortable as she appeared now, you could recognize that constant fear that must have lived in her. You knew too much about regret. You could see that in her eyes.

“And that’s where I come in. I can stop that. But we have to try first to see if it can work.” Reaching out a hesitant hand, you placed it on her knee still covered with the blanket and offered, “this power is inside you whether you like it or not. I don’t have perfect control over mine. I wish there were things I had done differently.” People you could have saved. People who you accidentally hurt. “You tried suppressing it, but that only made it explosive once it was actually let out. We can try to make it so you can live with it. Even if you don’t use it, at least you can control it.”

Vanya bit her lip and drooped her head, her hair falling in curtains around her face. You were curious about what her thoughts were. The furrow between her brows tensed and untensed in a way you knew her answer to the proposition was continually changing.

“Vanya, I’ve gone the self-destructive route to try and drown the voices out,” Klaus chirped up in the silence, his compassionate tone odd to your ears. From the corner, he strolled past you and rested a hand on his sister’s shoulder. “But I’ve never experienced quiet so fully until they put their field around me.” Soft eyes met yours as he added, “I never thought it was possible. It’s all I ever wanted.”

Holding his look for a moment, you weren’t quite sure what to say. You’d never really been… praised for your gift. Whenever you tried to use it to help someone else, you’d get called a freak or something worse. Any other time, it accidentally (well, purposefully sometimes) harmed someone. You could tell Klaus was sincere. Listening to the voices of the dead so much must be harrowing. You never really gave much thought about spirits and their presence, but for all you know, there could be multiple in the room with him at any moment. Always in pain. Always sharing that with him.

All you could manage to offer in response was a gentle smile before you tipped your head back to look at Vanya. “You don’t know me. I can’t ask you to trust me to do this. But why don’t you stay with me for a bit anyway? Klaus will be there, and you can come and go as you want, the others too. I’ll show you a couple of things I can do with the force field, and when you’re ready to test it out, we will. This is in your hands, Vanya. You’re in control.”

That’s all people like us could ever want. Control. Certainty—

Understanding.

“I already called sharing the bed with Trouble, just so you know,” Klaus said.

Although, it seemed your understanding clearly had its limits.

“If you did that, I would have to burn my bed so I didn’t get fleas. How about I get you a nice doggy bed instead?”

That got a grin out of Vanya, and when Allison added, “I think a flea repellent collar would be a wise investment as well,” her smile grew a little more comfortable.

“very funny, really, ” Klaus muttered.

“Okay. I’ll come with you,” Vanya finally conceded, reaching over to set her cup on the nightstand. “I’m— I don’t think I’m ready to try it out yet, but I guess if I do lose control again, having you there will be a good safety net?”

“We’ll all be your safety net this time.” Allison’s tone was earnest, remorse and care wrapped up on one. “I promise.” She sat on the bed and Vanya gently rested her head on her shoulder.

Whatever had gone on with this family, whatever tragedy had occurred in the past or with the current ordeal, seemed to be mending. You were kind of in awe staring at the scene. You had never known this kind of support since your father, and even then, you were so young that your memories of those feelings of comfort had faded. You lived alone. Didn’t really have any lasting friendships. You had the old couple across the hall who you played cards with at least once a week— though you were pretty sure they cheated every single time— but that wasn’t even close to what the Hargreeves had.

Family.

Standing back up, you heaved in a heavy breath. “I’ll leave you to pack,” you offered with your best shot at a cheery smile despite the sudden growing muck (jealousy, sadness, regret) festering through your veins. “Would you mind if I use the bathroom?”

Allison started to talk, offering you directions before Klaus interjected, “I’ll show you where it is.”

You were going to argue that you were perfectly capable of managing directions in the single apartment, but he placed his hand on your back and was quickly ushering you out of the door and down the rest of the hall.

“You really okay with doing this?” His questioned jarred you, eyes widening as you stepped away from his touch.

“Klaus, are you kidding?” You shot back, your exhaustion entrapping your exasperation in one low, breathy air. “I didn’t see you caring about that when I had originally said no multiple times.”

“You didn’t have that,” he stalled, struggling to come up with words as he haphazardly waved his hands in front of your face, “that look before. You looked sad when Vanya said she would come.”

Ah. You thought you’d shielded your face away from what you had felt. Strange that he would pick up on it. “It’s fine, Klaus. I want to help.”

Klaus didn’t look so sure, but he was also resigned enough to accept that answer. It was the truth anyway. It was a brief second of allowing yourself to feel bad. We all had those. A desire for something else someone has, for love, for care. But maybe this situation would help. Helping someone else, someone relatively similar to you, given the fucked up freak birth that messed up all their lives, would give you a sense of purpose.

“Can I ask you something, though?” You said, biting the inside of your cheek in a sort of nervous gesture.

“Yeah, sure,” Klaus prompted, curiosity lowing his eyebrows as he slightly tilted his head.

“Did you mean what you said in there? Did my blocking your power really help you that much?” You just needed to know. He looked so earnest, almost… desperate to experience it again. You felt seized by a sudden warmth. You just wanted to experience that again, whatever that was. To feel like you had done right.

“Trouble, you have no idea how much that helped. I meant what I said,” his tone turned almost affectionate, his eyes almost pleading with you to believe, “It really is all I ever wanted.”

And suddenly, the warmth that you hoped would have a growing familiarity in your body came back. However, there was something else there, nagging at the back of your consciousness, that you couldn’t quite grasp. It almost felt like concern or empathy, but there was something more. Despite Klaus’s kind words, there was an undercurrent of sadness to them. The man in front of you, who sometimes seemed so much younger and fragile than what he was, had been through hurt. You could recognize it. You had the moment you had met him and all the Hargreeves. But you were finally beginning to fully comprehend what his particular sadness was.

“It’s horrible to have been forced with a burden that could probably do so much good, but we just haven’t been able to see it.” You murmured, speaking your thoughts out loud without really meaning to. “All of you guys were forced to do good with your powers. Be the good guys, get the bad ones. That in itself was another burden just on top of it. You were kids. You never got to experience normal lives and have your powers adjusted to fit normalcy. I guess I’m lucky in that regard.”

You didn’t really know what you were saying. Just looking at Klaus’s face and the emotions you couldn’t read had you spewing words so freely that surely he must have thought you to be the erratic one now and not him.

“Sorry,” you laughed lightly, trying to break the tension. “I guess I’m just trying to say, if my power can do good by helping you guys out, then I’m happy. Whenever things get too noisy, just let me know and I’ll try and drown it out for you. Maybe just… living for a while, not stressing about your next plans, will help too.” You could try to provide some sort of normalcy in your shitty little apartment, with shitty cable, and an even shittier view.

“I’ll do that,” Klaus’s voice was so quiet you barely caught what he had said. “Thank you.”

Averting your gaze to the floor, you rubbed the tip of your nose with the back of your hand and stood in silence for a few moments.

“So uhm. Where’s that bathroom?”

“Oh, shit! Ah, yeah, just down the hall and to the right off the kitchen,” Klaus laughed, tension easing.

“What, not going to lead to it?” You teased.

“No, I think you can manage pretty well,” he smirked, before walking off into one of the adjacent rooms, probably to go pack.

What a shame. You’d probably have to burn all his clothes before they touched your carpets, now that you thought about it. You know, because of the fleas and all that.

[speeding-fox]

Sorabon Flies Solo?! A Lesson in Heroing! (Part 2 of 3)

~~~~

Author's Note: The "~~" signify a scene change.

~~~~

[Back at the base]

Once everyone returns to base, Shiro softly asks the kids to give him some time alone, understanding the situation they just got out of, they agree to give him some space for the time being. He heads for the door leading to the hallway that leads to the bedroom, he enters as soon as the sliding door open, once he entered, the door closes behind him, leaving the kids to talk amongst themselves.

Tiiru speaks first. "Man, Shirobon-san is really bummed." 

Polka rests upon the waiting bench, and puts his crutch beside him. "I'm pretty sure any parent would be bummed after their kid told them they hated them."

Tosukana's fists shook. "Ooooh, Sorabon has really crossed the line! I get he didn't want to stop being the hero, but him telling his dad he hated him because he didn't want to get grounded is too far!"

Polka nodded. "I couldn't agree more, and I'm the one that usually blows things out of proportion!"

While Polka and Tosukana were talking, Tiiru was gazing downward, deep in thought, thinking about the fight between Shiro and Sora. Something just didn't sit right with them, sure, Sora was a jerk to his dad, but they noticed some things about him while they tuned out Shiro's lecture. They thought they should address these things to the others. "Maybe that wasn't Sora talking."

"Huh?" Polka and Tosukana turned to Tiiru. "What do you mean, Tiirubon? Please elaborate." Tosukana insisted.

"Yeah, I want to hear how that couldn't have been Sora saying all that shi- Ow!" Polka got nudged by Tosukana before he said a swear. "I mean, all that crap." He corrected as he rubbed his arm.

"While I was tuning out Shirobon-san's lecture-" They began.

"Can't blame you for that, lectures do get boring after a bit." Polka interrupted.

"Yeah, they do. Anyway," They continue. "I took a better look at Sorabon, and noticed his eyes, they were completely purple, and had no shine at all."

"Really?" The two inquire simultaneously.

Tiiru nods. "Not just that, but his biidama is purple as well."

Tosukana rests a hand under his chin. "Now that I think about it, they were purple, weren't they? I was so mad at Sora that I didn't think to take that into account."

"Ya sayin' that Sorabon got corrupted?" Polka questioned.

Tiiru nods. "That's what the pieces chalk up to."

Polka groans and grabs his head. "Not this crap again! Can't the Dorketeers not corrupt someone for one week or whatever?!"

"I don't think it was them that corrupted Sorabon." Tiiru countered.

"Polka, do you remember when you got corrupted?" Tosukana questioned.

Polka shuddered. "Ugh, how can I not? It's a day I would rather forget part of."

Tosukana gestured to him and went on to explain. [*Cue visuals*] "When you were corrupted by the Neo Musketeers, your eye was completely white and had an evil look, your biidama was swirling with dark energy, and your voice sounded almost robotic." He then gestures to Tiiru. "When Ti got corrupted, their eyes were purple and lacked shine, their biidama was completely purple, and their voice was low, but otherwise normal." [*End of visuals*]

"So whoever corrupted me also corrupted Sorabon." Tiiru added.

"My thoughts exactly." Tosukana confirmed.

"Huh, I thought it was just Sorabon acting like a jerk." Polka grabs his crutch and helps himself up. "I guess that's not entirely the case after all, and Ti, I'm kinda surprised you pieced that together before me or Tucker did, usually you're just distracted by something, how smart of you."

Tiiru turned to him after watching a bug fly by. "Huh? Sorry, you say something, Porukabon?"

A sweatdrop appears on the side of Polka's head. "I retract my statement."

Tosukana turned to Polka. "Well, at least we now know why Sorabon is acting the way he is. Let's go find Shirobon-san, this is definitely something he needs to know."

~~~~

In Sora's bedroom, Shiro was sitting upon Sora's bed, facing the window as he stares down at a framed picture of him and Sora, both armored, smiling and winking at the camera as they held their hands next to eachother and did the "V" gesture. That photo was taken not long after Sora finally got Sky-Soarer and he and his friend Tiiru put a stop to the Neo Musketeers' thieving scheme. That day wasn't too long ago, but Shiro can still remember how proud he felt of Sora's accomplishment, the kid had come a long way from being a timid young boy.

That is a sharp contrast compared to him now, the son that once idolized him and wanted to follow in his footsteps now hates him with a burning passion and wants nothing to do with him. He can still hear those three words ringing in his ears, and they still sting so much. What did he do wrong..? Shiro was right in punishing him, but was he too hard on him? Should the punishment have been more lenient? What is he even supposed to do now to bring his son back..? Little did the distraught father know there is going to be an answer to that question.

The door to the bedroom slides open, and in walks Tosukana and the others. "Told you he'd be in here." Polka told Tosukana.

Tosukana just rolled his eyes and approached Shiro. "Shirobon-san."

"I thought I asked for some time alone..." Shiro wasn't saying this in a rude way, he just thought he would get some more time alone.

"You did, but we have some important information you need to know regarding Sorabon's behavior." Tosukana explained.

There was a pause, then Shiro turned to face them. "What is it?"

"We all know Sora's been acting like a total jerk, but we found the real reason he could be acting like a butt." Polka claimed.

Tosukana nods. "We strongly believe that Sorabon got corrupted."

"Corrupted..?" Shiro repeated, a bit stunned.

"When Tiirubon got corrupted, their eyes were purple and their shine was gone, and their biidama was completely purple as well, the same exact thing is going on with Sorabon." Tosukana elaborated.

"So whoever had corrupted me had also corrupted Sorabon, and what he had done and said, I don't think he meant any of it." Tiiru adds.

Shiro was quiet, processing what they all explained. "That explains a lot actually." He said softly. Getting reassured Sora likely didn't mean those things brought some relief, but his son is corrupted by this mysterious dark being, he needs help. "But what it doesn't explain is if the Neo Musketeers didn't corrupt Sorabon, then why are they attacking the City?"

Tosukana scratched his head. "I'm not too sure, but after talking to some citizens, I learned neither of them tried stealing anything of value."

"Maybe they didn't get the chance before Sorabon beat them?" Tiiru inquired.

"Or this is a part of the plan of whoever corrupted Sorabon." Polka adds. "While the Dorketeers are a pain in the butt, they don't attack the city without reason, and I know they wouldn't let themselves get beaten so easily."

"That's right." Tosukana affirmed. "It's not like them to attack without a goal and go down without a fight."

"But if whoever corrupted my son isn't after anything, then what's their end goal if it isn't to destroy the city?" Shiro questioned.

Tosukana puts a hand under his chin and stares downward to think about his question, but couldn't come up with a plausible answer. "I'm not too sure..." He shifts his gaze to Shiro. "But whatever their end goal is, it's obviously not good, and we need to put a stop to it."

Shiro nods. "I couldn't agree more." 

"But where do we even start?" Tiiru inquired. "We don't even know where Sorabon went."

"I think I may have an idea." Shiro takes out his phone. "Lucifer and Dandylion are the only ones that have attacked so far, right?"

"Yeah?" The kids reply, unsure what he's going on about.

Shiro turns his phone over to show them a map, showing two red dots, one on the downtown part of the city, and the other near the harbor. "These two dots show where they attacked, and there's a pattern, they both attacked near the most populated areas of the city." He flips the phone over to input something else. "And since Hades is the only one that seems to have not attacked yet," He flips the phone over once more, now there's a yellow dot on the map. "I bet she'll make her next attack at the Metropolitan area, the most populated area of Biida City!" He lowers the phone. "So if we leave now, we'll be there right before Sorabon comes to stop her and we can try to save him!"

"Right!" "Sounds like a plan!" "Let's rescue our friend!" Tosukana, Polka, and Tiiru say one after another.

"What are we waiting for?! Let's go!" Shiro announces.

"Yes sir!" The kids all shout at once.

~~~~

[Evening; Near the Metropolitan area of Biida City]

"Do I really have to do this, Boss?" Hades questioned to someone on the telecom. "I do not exactly feel like getting defeated twice in one day like my brother and sibling."

"Yes Hadesu." A female voice answered through the telecom. "If everything goes just right, I'll finally have one of the Planet Emblem bearers, so do not deviate, I want everything to go according to plan, understood?"

Hades sighed loudly. "Yes, Boss." The call ends, and she sighs once again. "I REALLY don't want to do this, but I'll incur the Boss's wrath if I don't follow through..." She groans. "Here goes nothing, I guess." She transforms and enters mecha-mode with Escar-Goon, then takes off to the Metropolitan area, and begins launching a barrage of attacks, making the citizens flee in terror. 

As if on cue, Sora, armored up, arrives at the scene not long after her attack began. "Hades!"

"If it isn't the brat that took out my older brother and sibling! On their behalf, I will take you down and avenge them!" She proclaimed.

"As if! You don't stand a chance against me! I'll make you and Escar-Goon escar-get-out-of-here!" He quips.

"Not if we have something to say about it!" The two mechs turn to the sound of the voice to see it came from Shiro, approaching fast on Crys-Whiter, with Tiiru, Tosukana, and the Polka in the Biida-Dolphin following close behind, all four have their armor on, then the four get inbetween Sora and Escar-Goon, Shiro facing his son while the other three face Hades.

"YOU LOT!?" Sora bellows. "I thought I told all of you to stay out of my way!"

"We won't be doing that, Sorabon, not when you need help!" Shiro countered.

"I told you, I don't need any of your help!" Sora screamed. "Get out of the way!"

"Tiirubon, Porukabon, Tosukana Akabon, you three keep Escar-Goon busy, I'll handle Sorabon." Shiro ordered without turning to the three.

"Got it." They affirm without turning around.

"NO! I won't let you take the spotlight away from me!" Sora snarled. He jumps up from his seat, and he and Sky-Soarer transform into mecha form. "Since you don't want to get out of my way, I WILL DESTROY ALL OF YOU!"

Shiro closes his eyes, he knows his son is corrupted, but hearing that coming from him still hurts. "Very well." He opens his eyes, jumps up, then backflips rapidly, and he and Crys-Whiter transform, after the transformation, he tells Sora: "But as your father, Sorabon, I will do whatever it takes to save you!"

"I DON'T NEED SAVING!" Sora bellows before he double-fires at Shiro, which he promptly dodges, beginning their battle.

Tiiru and Tosukana has transformed to get ready for their battle with Hades. She growls. "Grrr, I don't have time for this! Would you brats not interfere with our plan for once?!"

"No can do, Hadesu!~" Tiiru sung.

"Not on our watch!" Tosukana shouts.

"And what do you mean by "our" plans?!" Polka inquired. "Who else are you working with?!"

"None of your business!" She fires at the group, which they all get out of the way, and both parties engage in a heated battle.

As both battles went on, Polka, Tiiru, and Tosukana gained the upper hand, while Shiro struggled, landing a hit on Sora was too hard as he was too fast, he avoids attacks with such ease. It wasn't long until Shiro went down, hearing the nearby crash, Polka, Tosukana, and Tiiru all turned to find Crys-Whiter had been downed! "Shirobon-san!" They all call out, all three try to help, but Hades took advantage of this distraction to fire sticky slime shots, gumming up their thrusters and getting them stuck to the ground! "No! We can't move!" "Eugh, this is both gross and not good!" Polka and Tiiru cry out one after the other.

Crys-Whiter barely turns his head to their direction. "Kids!" He tried to lift himself up, but he couldn't summon enough strength to pick himself up, and plops back onto the ground. "Dang it!" He whispered intensely.

Sky-Soarer stood in front of him, towering over him. "You should've listened when I told you to stay out of my way, now you're paying the price." He charges up a shot.

Crys-Whiter manages to lift himself up, straining as he did so, and look up at him. "Sora! Stop! Please, listen! This isn't you! Fight it! I know you wouldn't want to do this!" Some tears escape the mecha's eyes (how? No idea.). "I know you're stronger than this darkness! Please son, snap out of it!"

Sora paused for an uncomfortably long time, then aimed the cannons at Shiro. "I'm not your son anymore."

"S-Sora..." was all Shiro could utter.

"SHIROBON-SAN! NOOO!" Tosukana, Polka, and Tiiru all cry out.

They all thought this was it, Shiro was going to be slain by his own flesh and blood, corrupted by this darkness in his heart. Shiro just closes his eyes tightly. "My son... I'm so sorry I failed you..."

Sora suddenly freezes, the cannons stop charging, then he grabs the mecha's head, and starts to scream and turn away from Shiro, and everyone else watches silently. Shiro really hoped this was Sora trying to fight for control. He goes eerily still, then after a moment, he checks one of his hands.

"Sora..?" Hearing his name said by Shiro, he slowly turns to look at him, Sky-Soarer's eyes were now a glowing light purple.

Shiro glared into his eyes, this is not his son looking at him, the amount of dark energy Sky-Soarer is now giving off made him shudder. "You're not Sora..." Shiro said lowly.

"Huh, I guess you do think after all. You're not usually a bright and observant one." "Sora" quipped, when he spoke, another voice could be heard within his voice.

"You..." Shiro growled. "Who do you think you are, controlling my son and speaking through him like he's your puppet?! Tell me now you dastardly monster!"

"Aww, but what would be the fun in that? That would spoil the surprise.~" "He" says teasingly.

"Let my son go! NOW!" Shiro demanded.

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid that's not going to happen." "He" gets next to him and rests "his" mechanical hand on Crys-Whiter's shoulder blade. "I need the kid for my plan, however..." "He" gets in front of him and kneels down to stare Shiro in the eyes. "I am willing to make an offer."

"An... offer?" Shiro repeated firmly.

"I'll let your son free, but you will have to join me." "He" told him.

"Join you?!" Shiro was torn on what to do, he would absolutely not join whoever this, but his son is at stake. He isn't sure what to do: join whoever this is to free Sora, or don't join and he will lose his son to the darkness.

"Seems like you're having a hard time making a choice." A dark aura begins to emanate from Sky-Soarer. "Maybe this will help make it easier for you."

Shiro shuddered as the dark energy sent a chill through his body. What do they think they're doing?! Why is he getting this odd feeling? No, this isn't an odd feeling, it's his desire to bring his son back, he wants to save him more than anything, he couldn't think about anything else, he wants his kid to be okay. "If I join you, you will free my son?" He asked, almost monotonously.

"Shiro-san!" Tiiru cried out.

"Yes." "He" replied and held "his" hand out. "I'm assuming you've made up your mind?"

"You better not, Shirobon-san!" Polka yelled.

"I just... I just want Sora to be spared from all this..." Crys-Whiter slowly reaches out to grab "his" hand.

"Shirobon-san! DON'T!" Tosukana screamed, making Shiro stop right when he was just about to grab Sky-Soarer's hand. "Don't accept their offer! They may have no intention of letting Sorabon go! If you do accept, he might never get free!"

Shiro came to his senses and recoiled Crys-Whiter's hand back. "He's right..." He gets enough strength to lift Crys-Whiter to his feet. "You had no intent on letting Sorabon free even after I accept your offer, didn't you?!"

"He" growled, then swiftly turned to the stuck kids. "You BRATS! I was so close! Do you have to RUIN EVERYTHING?!" 

"For evil people controlling our friend, of course we do!" Polka quipped.

"He" turned back to Shiro. "I'll take you out, first!" Then turns to the stuck kids. "Then I'll deal with you three!" "He" looks up at Hades. "Hadesu, you are dismissed, I want to deal with them on my own."

Escar-Goon shrugs. "Sure thing, Boss, I guess." She flies off. "It was getting boring listening to all the talking anyway."

"He" faced Shiro. "Enough of all this! Once you've been dealt with, I'll get what I want! Defeating you should be easy, given your mech's weakened."

"Whatever it is you're after, I won't let you take it, and I won't let you take my son!" Shiro proclaims.

"He" charges up a powerful shot and aims it at him. "Not if I destroy you in one hit!"

Out of nowhere, Sky-Soarer gets hit by a strong red heated blast from behind, interrupting the charging, knocking it down, and heavily damaging it. "GAAAH!" The heated red shots then hit the sticky slime trapping Tuscan-Dragon, Tenacious-Tealer, and Biida-Dolphin, making it melt off and free them.

Tuscan-Dragon lifts himself up. "We're free!"

"Finally!" Polka exclaimed.

"Hot! HOOOT!" Tiiru screamed as they flailed one of Tenacious-Tealer's arms to shake the now hot slime off their arm-wing, then sighed in relief once they did so.

Everyone looks up to see where the heated shots came from, and see Crimson-Dragon hovering above them. "I believe that's enough from you, puppetmaster!"

"Sukarettobon!" Tosukana exclaims.

"YOU AGAIN?!" "Sora" snarled.

"Sukarettobon," Shiro winks. "you came just in time!"

"Sora" groaned. "Had I known you were going to show up and ruin everything, I wouldn't have dismissed Hadesu!"

"That was a mistake on your part!" Polka quips.

"I'm out-numbered, I need to retreat for now!" "Sora" tried to fly away, only to immediately fall to the ground. "AGH!"

"Can't take off when your wings and thrusters are shot!" Tiiru comments.

"Sora" checks behind him, and sure enough, the wings and thruster were too damaged to allow flight. "Frick." "He" cursed under "his" breath.

To make sure "he" doesn't try getting away again, Polka uses the Biida-Dolphin's new biida cannon feature to charge up a stun shot, then fires at Sky-Soarer. It successfully hits and stuns "him," making "him" yell. "HAH! Even if I don't have Bolt-Striker, I'm still shocking!"

The stun shot essentially paralyzes Sky-Soarer, "Sora" can't move anything no matter how hard he tries! Tosukana and Tiiru use this chance to pick him up and hold "him" in place. "We got him, Shirobon-san!" Tiiru shouts. "Fire your healing shot!" Tosukana shouts after them.

"Sora" chuckles darkly. "You think a simple healing shot will bring your precious kid back? Once I have control of him, that will not be enough to free him."

Shiro stood there, glaring at "him" in the eyes. "Not... enough..?" Is he already too late to save Sora? No! It can't be! He knows his son is in there, he can feel it! If an ordinary healing shot won't be enough, then he needs more power!

He closes his eyes to focus, his biidama in the biida-cannon beginning to glow. "By all the light invested in me..." An emblem appears on the cannon's biidama. "Emblem, give me the power to cut the puppetmaster's strings from Sorabon! Light..." He fires a beam of light at Sora! "SHOOT!"

Tosukana and Tiiru hovered away after "Sora" got hit by the beam. "Sora" let's out a near ear-piercing scream as the light enveloped him. "NOOOOOOOO!"

Soon enough there is a bright light coming from "him," and Shiro barely sees a dark cloud in the shape of a broken heart leave Sky-Soarer's body, then dissolve in the light. The screaming soon dies down along with the light, and Sky-Soarer collapses to the ground, and Sora reverts back to normal, out-cold, but unscathed (and his sunglasses had slipped off).

"SORA!" Shiro transforms back to normal and rushes to his son, removes him from the seat, and cradles him. His biidama looked like it was back to normal, but that wasn't enough assurance to Shiro, he needed to know his son is free from the puppetmaster's control. "Sora! Sora! Please wake up Sora!" He begins tearing up. "Please..."

Scarlett, having transformed back to normal but is still wearing her armor, goes over to them. "Allow me to check, if you don't mind, Shirobon-san." Shiro just stayed quiet, watery-eyed, and let her do her thing. 

She checks Sora's biidama for power, a trick her Uncle Kuro taught her. After a bit, she removes her hand from his marble, and turns to Shiro. "I sense no leftover darkness within his biidama. He should wake up soon."

That is such a relief for him to hear. "Sukarettobon..." Shiro bows his head. "Thank you so much for your help."

She returns the bows, then turns around and walks to Tosukana and Tiiru, them having transformed back to normal as well. "Are you two okay?"

"Yes, thank you, sis." Tosukana answered, while Tiiru gave her a simple "Mm-hm!"

Polka steps over to them using his crutch. "Are you going to ask if I'm okay?"

She turns to him, looks him over and notices the crutch and bandages on his arms, then looks at him with a straight-face. "Do I have to ask you?"

Polka flails his free arm. "At least some concern would be appreciated!"

"Okay." She paused, and stares at him for a bit. "Are you okay?"

"Could be better, but thank you for asking." He answered with folded arms and mild sarcasm.

She rolled her eyes. "If we're done here, I'm leaving, and don't let Sorabon know I was here, I don't want to disappoint him for missing me. Take care everyone, and Porukabon." Scarlett hurries to her mech, transforms, then takes off.

"And there she goes." Says Tiiru as they watch her fly off.

"Your sister is a piece of work, Tucker." Polka comments.

"She's a piece of work? You were the one giving her attitude." Tosukana countered.

"Kids!" Shouts Shiro. "Sora's waking up!"

"He is?!" They all rush over and gather around in time to see him stir and groan softly.

Sora's eyes fluttered open as he came to, the first thing he was greeted by were the worried faces of his dad and friends. "D-Dad..? Guys..?" He called out weakly.

Upon hearing his voice, normal and not with another voice within it, his dad and friends gasp out of relief, and Shiro started tearing up again. "Sora..." He pulls him into a hug. "Sora! I'm so glad you're back! I-" He sniffled. "I thought I had lost you to the darkness!"

"Dad..." Sora croaked before returning the hug and started crying. "Dad, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean anything I said or did, I couldn't control it! I'm so sorry for hurting you!"

Shiro rubs Sora's back to soothe him. "I know you didn't mean any of that, you were being controlled by someone, it's not your fault."

"Th-Thank you." He sniffled. "Thank you so much for saving me."

Shiro somewhat moved away to look Sora in the eyes. "It's a parent's job to help out their kids when they're in trouble. There wasn't any way I was going to let someone take you away from me. And besides," He turns to Sora's friends, making Sora do so as well. "I'm not the only one you should be thanking. If it weren't for your friends' help, I don't want to know what could've happened to you, or heck, happened to me."

Sora nods. "You're right. Ti, Taka, Polka, thank you guys for saving me too, and I'm sorry for everything."

"Don't sweat it, Sorabon, like your dad said, it's not your fault." Tosukana said first.

"Yeah, and we're your buddies, Sora!" Tiiru adds. "What kind of friends would we be if we just stood back and did nothing when you were under some meanie's influence?"

"Not very good ones," Sora quips. "but I'm glad to have friends that aren't like that." He glanced at Polka, he had his arms folded, and was gazing away from Sora. He is still upset about something, and Sora knows exactly what that something is. If he wants to make it right, now's the right time to do it.

Sora gets up and goes to Polka. "Hey Porukabon." Polka glances at him, but doesn't say anything; Sora rubs the back of his head and looks aside. "About what I did to you and Bolt-Striker, I'm..." He lets out a soft sigh. "I'm sorry. I admit, I was in over my head, you were only trying to help, but I wound up hurting you and damaging Bolt-Striker." He looks back at Polka. "Again, sorry for that, and trying to blame you for something I did. Do you forgive me?"

Polka stares at him for a bit, turns away to think about it, then turns back to Sora. "I'm still mad about what you did earlier, so I can't forgive you for that, but I do forgive you for everything else passed that since some bi-, I mean, witch, took control of you. It's going to take time for me to forgive you for shooting at me, but if you want some of my forgiveness, you owe me."

Sora smiles. "Fair enough."

Shiro stands up. "Now that's settled," He places a hand on Sora's shoulder, prompting Sora to look at him. "let's head home."

"Sounds like a plan." Sora pauses. "Am I still grounded though?"

"Yes you are." Shiro replied without missing a beat.

"Wait what? Why??" He questioned.

"Your storming off from earlier put the base into lockdown." Shiro answered.

"I'm not the one that told Uncle Aobon to lock down the base." Sora countered sassily.

Polka chuckles. "Heh, he got ya there, Shirobon-san."

"Eh- Well, you made me tell him to do it!" Shiro countered.

Sora shrugs. "Whatever you say, dad."

"Anyway, I'm not sure if Sora can drive Sky-Soarer when it's like that." Polka motioned to the damaged Sky-Soarer.

"What?!" Sora rushes over to his mech to get a better look. "Awww maaan! It's trashed!" He then sighed. "But I understand why it's like that." He shifts his gaze to his dad. "I guess I'm literally grounded too, huh?"

Shiro chuckles. "I guess so, don't worry though, I can give you a lift on Crys-Whiter if you like, Tucker and Tiiru can take care of Sky-Soarer." He glances at the two. "If you two are fine with that."

Tosukana nods "Sure, you can count on us sir!"

Tiiru slouches over and complains. "Ohhhh, why do I have to do heavy lifting again?"

"Hey, at least you have someone helping you this time." Tosukana assured.

Sora laughed a bit at that, then he was suddenly scooped by Crys-Whiter's hands, startling him. "Whoa!"

"Sorry sport, didn't mean to scare ya." Shiro's voice echoed.

Sora looks up at his transformed dad. "I didn't think you meant this kind of lift, but I'm not gonna complain! Just don't drop me."

Crys-Whiter gave him a wink. "You were let down enough times today, I promise I won't let you down again."

Sora rolled his eyes at the dad joke, then laughed. "Let's just go."

When everyone was prepared, they all made their way back to base, and Sora hung on tight as his mechanized dad carried him and he enjoyed the ride. "By the way, where did my coat and sunglasses come from?"

"Honestly son, no idea." Shiro answered.

"It's probably better you don't know, they look so tacky on you." Tiiru comments.

"Enough of that, Tiirubon!" Polka scolded.

~~~~

[At an Unknown Location]

Dark Desire held a trembling fist as she had her back to the Neo Musketeers, the siblings were covered in bandages, and are cowering as they were on their knees. "B-B-Boss, I-I'm sorry n-nothing went ah-according to puh-puh-plan." Hades stammered, fearing her boss's wrath.

Dark Desire imbues her fist with dark energy as she raises it up, then punches the wall so hard it causes the entire place to shake, and the three siblings hug each other, fearing she'll unleash her wrath upon them next. "Those stupid BRATS!" She punches the wall again. "I WAS SO CLOSE!" She pulls her fist out, and glares at it as it shook. "If it weren't for those stupid kids being there, I would've had one of Planet Emblem bearers! Why did they have to get in the way?! F*ck them!"

She snaps her attention to the shaking trio, making them flinch and brace themselves. "You three!" 

"Ye-Ye-Yes ma'am..?" They question shakily.

She turns her back to three and waves a dismissive hand at them, and speaks in a calmer voice. "Please leave. I need time to myself to think of another plan."

The siblings all quickly stood and saluted her. "Yes ma'am!" The trio then zoomed out of the room, leaving Dark Desire by her lonesome to think.

"If I get one Planet Emblem bearer, I can get the rest." She muttered to herself. "But with all seven of them being "goody-two-shoes" makes it difficult to turn their hearts dark..." She paused. "Though... which one would be the easiest to corrupt first..?"

~~~~

[The Next Morning]

Shiro was awoken by Violet's gentle nudging and soft voice. "Uncle Shiro. Please wake up."

His eyes barely open, he softly groans as he rubs his eyes. It wasn't unusual for Violet to be up early, what was unusual was her waking him up, she usually wakes up her dad if she needed something. When he's done rubbing his eyes, he looks at her and asks groggily. "Is something wrong, Baiorettobon?"

"No, but it's about Sora." She answered softly.

The mention of his son woke him up a bit more. "Sora?" He sat up. "Is something wrong with Sora?"

"No, nothing's wrong with him, but when I went to the garage to see what other fixes Bolt-Striker needed, it looked like it was already all fixed, and I found him sleeping in it." She replied.

He gave her a bewildered look. "Wait, really? May you show me?"

Violet escorts him to the lab, and sure enough, Bolt-Striker looks all fixed up, and Sora is sleeping in the driver's seat, his head resting on the control panel. "How'd he get there?" Shiro questioned.

"I believe he stayed up all night to fix Bolt-Striker." "What would make you say that, Violet?" She pointed to the plans and blueprints displayed on a nearby table, Shiro followed where she was pointing. "Bolt-Striker's repair plans and blueprints are back on the table, when I know Daddy and Grampy put them away before calling it a night last night."

He stares at the repaired hovercar, putting his wrists on his hips. "Huh, so he did wind up staying up all night repairing Porukabon's mech." He chuckles softly. "Heh, I know Porukabon said he owed him, but I didn't think Sora would pay him back like this. It looks good as new, I'm impressed." He approaches the snoozing Sora.

Violet gets out her trusty wrench. "I hope he didn't install anything unnecessary or put something in wrong."

"How about you check if he did or not?" He suggests to her as gently picks up Sora, careful to not wake him, and holds him close to his chest. "I'm taking him back to bed."

Her glasses shine. "Yes sir." She immediately gets to work as Shiro takes Sora to his bedroom.

As he carried him, he reminisced back when Sora was really tiny, and he would hold him close to his chest to calm the kid down when he got scared, fussy, or needed comfort. He will never forget the warm closeness the two shared during those moments, heck, even now he feels the warm closeness. He's going to miss this once Sora gets his growth spurt.

Upon getting to Sora's room, Shiro softly steps to his bed, carefully places him on it, and tucks him in. "Rest well, champ, you really need it." He gently pats his head, which makes Sora stir in his sleep and turn to sleep on his side, facing the door. Shiro softly chuckles, then silently leaves the room. He's going to give Sora a little surprise when he wakes up.

~~~~

[flcshbangin]

@warpulse​ | i like writing five times kissed things so i thought i’d start with that​

i.)

usually, the most gorgeous and stunning things in life are also the most dangerous. there’s beauty to be behold in a storm, sweeping over the lands to leave destruction in it’s path. there’s beauty to be behold in the eyes of a fierce animal, just getting ready for the killing blow. there’s beauty to be behold in fire licking up and devouring whatever it reaches.

comparing someone such as jack morrison to these things might seem a little out of place, maybe. especially when it’s the golden strike team all together – amari fits the description of an slender animal just waiting for the right time to rip someone’s throat out better; reyes is fire that burns all that it touches – but jack? jack is calm in the way a storm is. the softness right before it, but you can already see the force of nature coming up.

it’s one thing that makes people underestimate him, maybe. the un for sure – jesse has never been one for politics much, not in that high up and holier-than-thou attitude these people would play, but he can read between lines, and it’s clear they thought that this was their best shot to have someone they could rope into their biding, and they couldn’t have been more wrong. he knows this already three weeks into being on base, and after a total of seeing the man in person four times; combining to less than ten minutes overall. he also knows that, no matter what reyes says, if jack hadn’t liked him in some way, then there wouldn’t have been any deal. sure, his new commanding officer would say different, but it shows in subtle ways, and all the same unmistakable.

(don’t. don’t make things harder on yourself by pretending there is something when there’s not. you’re imagining, and that’s only going to complicate things.)

passing by the office, the door a rare sight by being ajar, he grins at the strike commander and blows a kiss in his direction – something not entirely atypical, but maybe still uncalled for given how unsteady his own position here is at this point still. figures the man won’t notice anyway; if he’s another thing, it’s constantly wrapped up in work.

so the brief smile? not directed at him.

 ii.)

he has seen him in action, alright. not often – blackwatch doesn’t often run operations with overwatch, but they sometimes lend one or two their agents to them. not the other way around, too risky. still, even then, the strike commander himself is obviously rarely with them on the field.

it takes no genius to know that he would rather be there than talk to the politicians who want to talk over everything a hundred and a thousand times, even more so when critical thinking and fast acting are of utmost importance. they don’t care about the individual lives on the line; as long as the numbers say under a certain threshold, they don’t care.

a more idealistic person than jesse might have condemned them, but he knows enough to understand that the greater good has to outweigh the smaller one; even if he doesn’t like it. he’s an optimist and a romantic, but he’s also a killer. a weapon to reyes and blackwatch as much as the gun in his own hand, and just because he occasionally works for overwatch instead doesn’t make it a hammer instead. destroy, not build.

(he wished differently.)

still, the very rare time one could witness jack? it was truly a sight to behold. a whole different man than the one behind the desk. fierce and efficient and breathtaking; a stunning spectacle. it makes it difficult to concentrate on anything else, really.

a storm made man.

on the transport back, the glow has somewhat faded, but it doesn’t make him less dangerous, or less admirable. exhausted, but in good spirits. they didn’t loose anyone today. the smirk he wears while mentioning that he’ll be watched with hawk’s eyes again so he doesn’t sneak off to fight himself again makes him look ten years younger, and jesse yearns, and the only way he knows to express this is with smart remarks and flirtations that could count as jokes, even though they very much aren’t. nervousness makes them more frequent with each smile and even laugh, and he wonders, briefly, if he died out there after all and this is both heaven and hell at once.

(you wouldn’t go to heaven, don’t fool yourself.)

he all but flees as soon as they arrive back home, and takes the longest cold shower of his life, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t still seeing him in front of his inner eye; transfixed on his lips, and he wonders, not for the first time, he’d imagine what it’d be like to kiss him.

by the time he falls asleep, later, he needs another shower.

 iii.)

it comes expected, and not at all.

when they actually do come together, it’s a whirl of it’s own, but at the very same time, it happens slowly, deliberately. there’s method to the destruction that happens within his heart, and he wonders, not for the first time, if this is reality or if he’s dying and his brain produces just what it had summoned countless times before, but adds new details here and there.

(ground yourself.)

(five things you see.)

the intense blueness of jack’s eyes, burning into his. his hair, disheveled. his very own hand, on the other’s hip. the very much closed door. that smirk that seems both sappy and absolutely shit eating.

(four things you feel.)

the shirt under his hand, stretching over defined muscle. the warmth of another body far too close and impossibly far. fingers in his hair, over the back of his neck, not pulling or pushing, but just… there. nice. lips on his, hot and pulsing and real.

(three things you hear.)

the rushing of his own blood in his ears. rustling of clothes against each other. shared breath, a bit heavy from a lack of oxygen.

(two things you can smell.)

a mixture of ink, cologne and gunpowder, just beneath it. the lingering smell of forgotten coffee.

(one thing you can taste.)

him. all over – deep and rich and unlike anyone else jesse has kissed before in his life – which doesn’t include a lot of people, but it’s still different, and in such a good way. a taste he could and might drown in, that absolutely fills his lungs.

real.

he almost laughs, but doesn’t because he doesn’t want to ruin the moment, and presses in again.

 iv.)

it’s late. the clock ticks away with its arms far closer to morning already than they are to the previous evening, but that’s nothing new. they both don’t sleep a lot, for many of the same and many different reasons. besides, they usually do this late, when there’s nobody to ask questions. it’s not that they hide because they want to, but there’s questions that doesn’t need to be asked. it’s easier in the overall picture. it’s better in case someone decides to poke around and make shit up that isn’t there. it’s easy to read into it with their vastly differing positions, but there’s nothing to it there. and neither wants anyone to put their nose into things that don’t belong to them.

it’s not that he doesn’t wonder, occasionally. what it would be like; being just about anyone where nobody cares who you want to spend your life with. actually, having a life to spend with someone, not just evenings between exhaustion and wars, be they real or on paper.

no question: he loves this man. he would go through hell for him. might even already do it, even if jack is unaware of some of the things he does to keep him safe. surely, the other way around too. maybe even more so. they don’t talk about it much; bad enough to weight it on one’s conscious, no need to share those burdens in detail. they do without words.

it might, at some point, prove to be a problem, but for now? for now it’s easy to drown out the voices and the whispers and the doubts with a gentle kiss, and soft touches, and the affirmation that feelings are shared, and returned.

(when has love alone ever been enough?)

 v.)

the world is going to hell.

less literal than the last time. maybe not even the entire world. no, definitely not the entire world – just his entire world. just the part that matters most to him.

they try talking, but it never works out. they don’t listen to each other. they never learned how to. maybe if they did from the start – no secrets kept, no parts of themselves still hidden underneath layers laid bare already, then maybe this could be saved. but the path they move on only holds doom.

in his mind, he begs. come with me. leave this all behind. we can start new, somewhere else where nobody knows who we are.

nonsense, of course, there’s nowhere they would be able to escape to. and even if: there’s no way he would come.

there are two options: he stays, with him. on a path that’s self destructive at best, caught between two opposing forces, and he will get crushed in between. in a way, fitting – he decided to move into the storm, nest in its heart, so it’s only fair if it tears out his very own. poetic, if you will. and maybe have a moment of peace before the end.

the other part – he leaves. breaks both their hearts for sure, but with some luck, it breaks the habit just enough for the man he loves to readjust his look at the world, and see what’s wrong. jesse can’t tell, he never could tell right from wrong, but jack did, once upon a time, and maybe he could again.

(that’s the lie that sets in his heart. truth is: he’s a coward, and he cannot stand watching the love of his life destroy himself even further. that’s what really breaks him here.)

seeing him less and less, he wonders if his absence would even be noticed. if he is, by now, anything but another voice to argue against, and a weight in the bed that’s barely shared anymore.

when he kisses jack now, it’s not warmth of liquid sunshine anymore, or the rich bitterness of his coffee. he tastes of ash, and a harsh winter. jesse’s heart bleeds, but he cannot watch them both rot away to nothingness. he can’t.

he leaves, in the first rays of the day, but he leaves his heart in their bed. it had been there for far longer than he had been.

 addendum.)

he hadn’t been at the funeral. too risky, even if he hated himself for it.

when he finally visits, it’s quiet. no wind at all. maybe that’s fitting. maybe. he doesn’t know anymore. he doesn’t know a lot of things these days.

he spends longer than he should. no words leave his lips – he does talk, just not out loud. if the words left his mouth without reply, he might as well just open up the earth and join the man he loved, and whom he left behind without any regard of how he might feel about it.

he wishes he could apologize.

he wishes, he wishes but oh – the wind is gone, and all that remains is an eerie silence, ringing in his ears, scorching the hollow hole inside his chest where once a heart rested. quiet.

[thewriterwithnoplan]

Dirty and Useless (Part 12)

Summary: Jason Todd had always said there were only two types of cop; Dirty and Useless. So when Y/N comes along with a spunky partner and a laughable code name it’s safe to say they don’t exactly see eye to eye. But if they’ve got anything in common it’s their secrets. Both are hiding behind masks whether they know it or not. Will the Robin get the Nightingale to come out of the shadows? Pairing: Titans!Jason Todd x Reader Word Count: 1543 Warnings: None.

Bruce Wayne was a man of many things. He was a billionaire playboy, a caped crusader, and a proud business owner. Over the years he had donned several masks, each one more intricate and fragile as the last. One thing he had never imagined being – a father. Or rather an absentee, poor excuse of a father.

He’d given it his all, taught his daughter every skill he knew. But somehow, he had still missed the important stuff, the little achievements that had nothing to do with beating a villain into a gutter in crime alley. He’d missed milestones and holidays, graduations and birthdays. But most of all he’d missed the warning signs.

Looking back at it, there had been plenty of signs that Y/N was not happy with her gold-encrusted canary cage. Her protectiveness toward the Sparrow had been the biggest warning. But by then – too busy with his new protégé Dick Grayson – Bruce was far too arrogant to see it. And then all at once, she was gone – in court on one day, out of Gotham the next.

What Bruce Wayne had never been prepared for, was the possibility that maybe the problem hadn’t been Y/N. He’d tried to replace her time and time again. First with Dick Grayson, who he’d molded into the perfect Robin. But even then, Bruce had missed the cries for help and Dick had left too.

But this time, with Jason Todd – whose only wish was to be close to the great Batman – there was no possible way that Bruce could screw this up. Or so the man had thought. Somehow, he’d managed to push even the ever-so-violently-brash Jason away.

“And how was your day Jason?” Bruce asked over dinner – despite the fact that Jason had made a point to ignore the man all afternoon.

“It was fine.” He sighed, with a deject shrug. “Y/N took me out after lunch, so it wasn’t exactly the worst.”

Y/N gave him a teasing pout, “You make it sound like seeing me isn’t the highlight of your day.”

Jason’s answering expression was something of an amused smirk, with a playful eye roll thrown in the mix. For whatever reason Jason’s grumpy mood was directed only at the big bad Batman. Y/N gave an exasperated sigh as she tutted into a spoonful of her dinner.

“Oops, sorry Jay,” She snarked, “I didn’t mean to get in the way of your whole teenage angst thing. How long does it take you to make your hair look like you could careless in a perfect sorta way?”

Bruce had no idea what his daughter was going on about but his newest protégé obviously did. The boy had to wait several minutes for his shoulders to stop shaking in silent laughter before he answered;

“It was your bike helmets, the style just seemed to suit me.”

Y/N cracked a smile, “Sure does, Boy Blunder.”

“Oh, like you’re not the clumsiest girl I’ve ever met,” He grumbled, running a hand through his hair unconsciously. “You tripped over like three times, at the park today.”

“Wait, you two went to the park?” Bruce interrupted.

“Well yeah,” Y/N shrugged, “Jason told you, I took him out of school after lunch so we could get ice cream.”

Jason scoffed loudly, eyebrows raised, “When you say it like that it sounds like you didn’t roll up on your motorcycle and threaten Gregory.”

“That was his name?”

“You what?” Bruce demanded. “What were you thinking? What if the press finds out?”

“Say they’re lying? I don’t know what you’re worried about, I’m the lost daughter of Gotham they’re not going to do anything.”

Bruce opened his mouth to continue ranting, likely about how she was being irresponsible and painting a bad picture for the Wayne name. She’d heard the same lecture a million times before, Jason probably had too. So, when her phone started ringing merrily, both were a little more than relieved.

Holding a silencing finger up – rather rudely, but what did she care – she held the phone to her ear for a moment. After grumbling a few affirmatives and answering a few no doubt strange questions, Y/N hung up and turned to Jason.

“I’m going to see a friend after dinner,” She gave a wicked grin. “Care to join me?”

***

Jason Todd was glad he wasn’t a villain. He’d rather fight Joker a hundred times over than spend more than a handful of minutes in Arkham Asylum. It was fucking creepy as shit. With damp corridors, low ceilings and rows of flickering lights it was straight out of an old horror story.

But Y/N seemed right at home as she strode beside him, navigating the halls like she knew the place inside and out. It was not reassuring. She strut between the barred doors, paying little attention to the cackling lunatics within. For whatever reason Jason had assumed that they were going to meet a level headed companion. Perhaps one of her colleagues from the bureau or a down to earth socialite that she’d befriended.

Instead, they were being escorted through a fucking prison. It seemed that the woman wasn’t done scarring him just yet. At first, he’d chuckled at the idea; how could she beat making a seasoned Gotham thug piss himself with only her eerie singing? The answer was simple – by dragging him through the prison of Gotham’s most wanted, most of whom were likewise pissing themselves at the mere sight of her.

“We just passed Bane,” Jason gawked, “He fucking bowed.”

“I’ve been at this a hell of a lot longer than you,” She shrugged as if it were that simple. “I figure that being nice to the villains gets you further in life, but some of them – Bane for example – think that’s weakness. So, I had to show him that my kindness is a blessing. One that he should be begging for.”

Jason reminded himself why he wanted her on his side. She was a different breed of vigilante, one that people thought twice about crossing. He doubted that the GCPD ever gave her trouble like they did to him and Bruce. Perhaps she had scared the shit out of them too, or maybe they left her be because all she did was sing her song and everyone fell to their knees.

Not for the first time he wondered what it had been like when she’d first started out. She must have done something to command so much respect. Somewhere along the lines, she must have been forced to prove herself. He wondered if she’d ever killed anyone in pursuit of the power, she now so carelessly wielded. It wasn’t exactly unlikely.

“So, who are we visiting?”

“Harvey Dent.” It fell silent for a moment, as Jason waited for her to explain. But the silence seemed to only stretch on further, as they made their way through the Asylum.

“Two-face?”He exhaled heavily, “Why the fuck are we visiting a half-retired, back alley villain? He’s got no stake in the upcoming war, I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t know shit about it.”

“Harvey knows something about everything,” Y/N assured as she straightened out her blazer. “He’ll have plenty of information about your precious little clown fight.”  

“You sound like you know him.”

“In the old days - before the whole acid to the side of his face thing – he worked with my father. Putting the criminals, we caught behind bars.” She tugged at her sleeves, hating the fact that she’d been forced to wear the stiff outfit to convince the guards they were on ‘official-business’. “Dad tried to rehabilitate him a few times but I… Look I’m not proud of it, but I set him up to take outa few low-level criminals.”

“You set him up to take people out?” Jason couldn’t hold in his snickers if he tried. “You, little Miss. Perfect Daughter of Gotham? I don’t believe you for a second.”

“That’s funny, bird brain.” Y/N pulled at the shoulder of his own suit, making sure it sat properly. “Anyway, when I was trying to get the court to let me leave Gotham, Harvey helped me. He’s an A-list Gotham asshole but he keeps quiet enough that he can discreetly provide information.”

“I could’ve gotten us the same info.” Jason rolled his eyes, “What’s the point of all this when we could punch it out of the Joker himself.”

They paused in front of a door, “Well that’s not exactly discrete is it? The point of calling me in, was to minimize damages, wasn’t it? If we can get the right information, we could defuse all this before it even starts. So, think of this as your second lesson.”

“Yeah, so lesson one; fight with the Robin symbol.” He scoffed, “Let me guess, lesson two; try talking first? Bruce would be so proud.”

Y/N sighed heavily. She dug a key out of her pocket, wondering how any of the criminals in Arkham, managed to stay there for long at all as she unlocked the door in front of them. A familiar half-melted face greeted her from the metallic table he’d been handcuffed to. Two-face’s signature coin, rolling between his fingers.

“Lesson two is shut up and do as I do.”

A/N: With the second season of Titans finally on Netflix, this story is going to be updated far more frequently so I’d like to ask; After the Joker v Harley fight is cleared up, would you like to see some things from Season 2? 

And further on in the story, there might be some discussion around who the reader's mother is. So if you have any thoughts or recommendations on who Y/N’s mother should be, feel free to comment them! 

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [so like evening like probably not expecting this] Janis: what you up to tonight Jimmy: What are you about to ask me to do? Janis: Sadly, nothing that exciting Janis: but I need out of this house so if you've got something going on, we can make some #content Jimmy: Find a party and I'll meet you there Janis: Okay Janis: it's been dry so far but not everyone can have decided to be boring all at once Jimmy: have you moved to a new town without telling me? Jimmy: bit rude to make me fake ldr Janis: God, I wish Janis: I need to be several towns over with the noise that being made in this gaff rn Jimmy: They're there and you didn't invite me? That's more than a bit rude, mate 💔 Janis: Oh yeah Janis: sleepover fetish is so real 🤤😍 Jimmy: You know how I feel about you in PJs Jimmy: how dare you Janis: I know you're just gutted you didn't get a chance to see 💀👑 in hers Janis: 💔💔 hurts Jimmy: [brings back the # he started about her only wearing pjs cos I skim re-read that convo post school trip yesterday] Janis: Fine, come over Janis: if you love a throwback that hard Janis: we won't be sharing a room with them though Jimmy: I'd 💕 some enthusiasm Janis: You can have all the snacks they won't eat Jimmy: Has my true love cleared that? Janis: You have to save her from herself Janis: they do it on purpose, it's a binge waiting to happen Jimmy: hot Janis: If you've got a saviour complex Janis: put on your cape, crown of thorns, whatever suits Jimmy: If you've got a short enough memory to forget me saving you from a life threatening injury and nursing you back from the brink Jimmy: suited you then Janis: I remember, if less dramatically and in your favour Janis: but I never said it didn't suit Jimmy: know my audience and how they remember it Jimmy: Give me your address then, Juliet Janis: Hmm, Grace would say you owe her damages, probably Janis: [does, lol soz] Jimmy: she knows where I am if she wants to claim Jimmy: I'll have 'em off you though for taking the piss Janis: Only my parents doing that Janis: I'll pay for an uber if you can cope with the flex Janis: desperate times, like Jimmy: shut up Janis: bit rude Jimmy: bit rude is sending me into the middle of nowt to get 💀🔪🔪 Janis: You can trust me Jimmy: Piss off Janis: 🙂🙂🙂🙂 Jimmy: Stop messing about, rich girl Janis: I ain't, look on street view or some shit, it's a big hippie farmhouse Jimmy: [does so a pause] Jimmy: 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 Janis: I'll get you an uber now, yeah? Janis: before they 💀🔪🔪 me in some sleepover satanic ritual Jimmy: I can't have them fucking with our pact Janis: my hero 💘 Jimmy: there's your first caption sorted Janis: I'll think of something as mushy for you in the meantime Jimmy: do you need owt other than a ✞? I'm at the shop Janis: 🤔 Janis: get a like meal for two I can pretend I cooked Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I assume you've got 🚬s Jimmy: I'll grab drinks though Janis: can do Janis: we have some shit here too though Jimmy: What's #goals when you're not drinking a flat white? Janis: if it's pink and alcoholic Jimmy: [sends her pics of different drinks like rose wine or pink gin or whatever else like ?] Janis: Better go gin Janis: it is an emergency Jimmy: [when that's got mum energy so you're lowkey triggered and don't reply] Janis: [when you think it's 'cos it was too pricey or something so you're like oh no faux pas] Janis: the rose would be fine too, I'm not fussy, as you know by now Jimmy: [thinking about Harry too now but sends a selfie from the uber with the gin secured like everything's fine] Janis: 😍 Janis: should I socials that? Jimmy: Why not? Janis: idk how vain you're feeling Janis: maybe you wanna fix your hair Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Jimmy: if I weren't I wouldn't be coming to mess up yours Janis: 😏 Janis: [does post it, with all that enthusiasm about him coming that is so fake uhuh] Jimmy: [a cute little back and forth in the comments while he's on route] Janis: [one of them clearly has liked it so now they know they know] Janis: There we go, committed now Jimmy: [love that though cos it gives them an excuse to go harder with it which he would and is] Jimmy: Is that a record or what? Janis: wait 'til you see their creepy faces fogging up the glass Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Jimmy: no horror films needed Janis: got the setting Janis: even if I 🤞 I'm here, like Jimmy: Promise you'll protect me Janis: 💪 babe Janis: you're safe with me Jimmy: Say it then Janis: What? Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: Oh Janis: I promise I'll protect you from 💀👑 and her underlings Janis: salt circles all ready, like Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 you Janis: you're feeling generous Janis: have you opened that pink gin without me Jimmy: you ain't feeling any trust towards me Jimmy: 💔🎻🎻💔 Janis: I'm trusting you with my life rn Janis: you've got to fend off the pillows in the night Jimmy: hot Janis: glad you think so Jimmy: oi, be glad you know it Jimmy: that's a #kinkunlocked Janis: Add it to my collection Janis: 🎟🎟🎟🎟 what do I win when I get enough? Jimmy: What do you want? Janis: fuck a 🧸 obvs Jimmy: If that's what you're getting me to this sleepover for, steady on Jimmy: he can buy me a drink first instead of making me bring my own Janis: 😂😂😂 Janis: stop Janis: his plans are set and he is gutted Janis: 🚫 sneaking out Jimmy: me an' all, put in loads of groundwork on that trip Jimmy: treating him mean and all that bollocks Janis: 💔🎻🎻💔 Janis: when it was all a cunning ruse to see Mr. Bear again Jimmy: It's my turn to cheat, Joanne Janis: you'll have to take your free pass to the bathroom 'cos we can't not share a room Janis: and I don't need to witness that tah Jimmy: It's alright, I won't kiss him on the mouth Janis: she probably practices on him Janis: it'll be sticky Jimmy: 🤢🤢🤢 Jimmy: I said I never opened the gin not that I ain't drank nowt Janis: such a lightweight Jimmy: Leave it out, pisshead Jimmy: I didn't know you were gonna 🍑📞 Janis: Do you feel cheap? Janis: 'cos that ride ain't, so don't worry boo 😘 Jimmy: I ain't been in an uber before, how could I not feel 🤑🤑 Janis: 🤞 you get here unmurdered and unmolested Janis: driver gonna ruin my night, like Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: that might make my night 💕👴 Janis: obviously, I am here to ruin your night Janis: 🍑📞 shoulda let you know Janis: were you out? Jimmy: With who, my other fake girlfriend? Janis: I can be that jealous Janis: they'd pretend they didn't love that but they so would Jimmy: I'd drink to it Janis: [a picture of 🧸 in the washing machine like 'bout to drown a bitch for you] Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: sod nudes, get you a girl who sends 💀💀💀 threats she's about to follow through on Janis: you're so welcome Janis: he'll be date ready and so will you 🍆💦💦 Jimmy: Depends if they've set a trap on the front door Janis: There's no way they'll be ready for gentlemen callers that soon Janis: you could be travelling from the fucking moon and they'd still be hiding Jimmy: Asia's always ready for me, babe Jimmy: The tall one an' all Janis: you're disgusting Jimmy: soz that you thought you were my only starcrossed lover Janis: Of course not Janis: just the idea of those two doing anything beyond 😭 makes me wanna 💀💀💀 obvs Jimmy: I might 🤢🤢🤢 which is 💀👑 ultimate kink so please shut up Janis: Errm they're your lovers, not mine Jimmy: sound more gutted, mate Janis: what is it this time Janis: 😍 for you or them Jimmy: Me obvs Jimmy: keep up, girl Janis: thanks for saying I'm doing a 🥇🏆 job Jimmy: You're not gay, Judith Jimmy: And even if you were, you ain't 🥇 enough to fake 😍 for them Janis: that was very affirming and then rude Janis: but I'll take it Jimmy: There you go then Jimmy: I'd offer you a gold star but that's a bit Janis: insulting at this point Jimmy: I never thought you were Janis: ? Jimmy: Why did you reckon I thought you were gay? Janis: 'cos you said I was obsessed with them Jimmy: Nah Jimmy: I said the bollocks they say and do is more important to you than it is to me Janis: You might wanna work on your phrasing then Janis: but idc Jimmy: Alright Janis: but for the record, I only think you're gay for Dan Jimmy: @iantaylor8 Janis: v offensive that I've not affirmed your heterosexuality in his 👀 Jimmy: I'll live Janis: I won't Janis: deeply wounded Jimmy: Tah for the warning so I don't go arse over in the blood Janis: not a very heroic way to die Janis: even Romeo did better Jimmy: He had Bill, I'm holding my own 🖋 Janis: hot Jimmy: 😏 Janis: [tweets that gem] Jimmy: [having another flirt via socials] Janis: [love that for you] Jimmy: Have you got a balcony? Janis: Sadly not Janis: been let down big time there Jimmy: And I couldn't fit the 🎻 in my overnight bag Janis: Just when we needed it most Jimmy: it's a piss poor shout, I'm sorry baby Janis: It's alright, in terms of convincing them we're fucking all night, probably need a less 💔 soundtrack Jimmy: 👍 or 👎 to Romeo + Juliet soundtrack? Janis: yes Janis: of course Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: For an all nighter we've got our Easter Rising one an' all, Tah Dan Janis: He'll be thrilled he's having a hand in our fictional fuckfest, I'm sure Janis: a hand in was the best choice of words there Jimmy: He'll be getting me through it 🍆💦💦 Janis: 🤤 hard same Janis: you were such a cockblock Jimmy: Invite him over, I'll go home Janis: He probably has a curfew Janis: God bless Jimmy: Bringing him into it an' all again Janis: He does reside here Janis: apparently Janis: I've never seen him and he doesn't do any chores but Jimmy: holy 👻 and unholy 👻 boy in your gaff Jimmy: might be a scrap Janis: you'll be buzzin' then Janis: making your night over and over, babe Jimmy: can't stop being #goals you Janis: not an amateur Jimmy: loads of time to prove it in a bit Janis: challenge accepted Jimmy: 👍 Janis: You do sleepovers with your mates before? Jimmy: Why? Janis: 🤷 Janis: curious Janis: not as talked about Janis: what do boys do Jimmy: What do you reckon? Jimmy: I'd be gutted to 💔 you Janis: Obviously I'm 💔 that you don't talk about girls and 'practice' kissing Janis: but if you confirm you just play videogames and drink cheap beers on the low, I think I'll survive Jimmy: We do talk about girls but there's no need to practice kissing when you're this 😎🏆 Janis: 😏 okay Janis: not sharing your expertise is selfish of you Jimmy: My ex shared it round plenty, don't worry Jimmy: Half the north knows my tips and tricks Janis: Bummer Janis: No thinking I'm special then, I hear you Jimmy: I can't stop you thinking owt Janis: It's alright, I'm specials in every other way Jimmy: Bighead strikes again Janis: yeah, try and deny it, dickhead Jimmy: That you think you're special? Janis: You know what I meant Janis: you 🙊 me 🙉 Jimmy: Oi I'm 🦍 Jimmy: Ask my man Janis: You're SO hench, babe Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 Janis: I'm SO lucky Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: You picked a film for us to not watch yet? Janis: I'm debating what the worst romcom of all time is Jimmy: [sends her a little list because he's had a nightmare girlfriend] Jimmy: off the top of my head Janis: kink unlocked Janis: that's worse than any of the others so far, God Janis: deviant Jimmy: Piss off Janis: No wonder they all love you Jimmy: They ain't unlocked any of my kinks, real or fake Janis: Are you sure? Janis: they're accomplished stalkers if fuck all else, like Jimmy: I don't have a tinder with 'em listed Jimmy: What are they gonna stalk? Janis: Yo 🧠 Janis: vampire style Jimmy: You're the only 🧛 I've met Janis: 😏 Janis: and I'd do it again Janis: were I not bound to protect you Jimmy: Crack on Jimmy: If we're meant to be pulling a 💕 all nighter you'll have to do something Janis: If we're convincing enough, they'll spread it 'fore us Janis: spare your precious skin Jimmy: Challenge accepted Jimmy: [is extra on socials again for the final time like see how convincing I am] Janis: I know it didn't hurt that bad, baby Jimmy: Do you? Janis: Did it? Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: That's not fair Janis: if I Mike Tyson'd you you have to say Jimmy: I'll tell you in my oscar speech Janis: You'll be thanking me then Janis: ha, knew you loved it Jimmy: for the adversity Jimmy: tah Janis: pisstake Jimmy: you Janis: ☝ boy Jimmy: Why are you trying to truth or dare me before I'm in the door? Calm it down, Joan Janis: Party don't start 'til you walk in? Janis: Psh Jimmy: I need an audience and a stage, Bill can relate Janis: Duh Janis: what it's all about Jimmy: #whenshegetsyou Janis: we're a step away from a contract Jimmy: 🩸🖋💌 Janis: trying to tempt me with some bloodletting Janis: 😳 is it hot in here Jimmy: I wanna get my 🎟🎟🎟🎟🎟 too Janis: you already knew that one Janis: #eargate Jimmy: Yeah but now you're in the mood Jimmy: might let loads slip Janis: You'll have to work harder than this Jimmy: [🔥 sext because why not] Janis: did your driver co-write that or Jimmy: You can ask him when you pay him, that won't be weird Janis: just wondering where the audience is Jimmy: Post it if you wanna find them, not gonna be far away Janis: [does not] Janis: I'm not going to make you meet my parents, by the way Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Should be a rule that Jimmy: I'd bleed to keep you away from mine Janis: Now you're just trying to be hot Jimmy: 😎🚬 Jimmy: #effortless Janis: you better not be in that car Janis: not paying your cleaning bill too Jimmy: It's behind the ear you didn't take off Jimmy: We're alright Janis: Can't say I'm not fair 😏 Jimmy: Not when anyone's about Janis: I know the audience too Jimmy: Be a long night if you don't Janis: shut up Janis: they'll crash before we do anyway Janis: then you can actually do what you want Jimmy: I know you wanna talk about girls and play videogames like a northern lad Jimmy: 🥧🥔🍺 weren't the meal deal though 💔 Janis: 🖕 Janis: oh no, however will I cope Jimmy: I dunno, mate Jimmy: I'll have to double up on the heroics, me Janis: you're allowed to sleep, you know Janis: overtime ain't an all-nighter too Jimmy: might do but I only chucked the one bottle in my basket Janis: we've got some great sleeping pills Janis: dessert 💕 Jimmy: You're alright Janis: 🤷 Janis: not on commission Jimmy: You must know the audience if you're trying to knock me out this hard Janis: How long can we be in each other's company before you try to seriously injure me Janis: nothing but self-preservation here Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I know my own 💪🏆 Janis: Doing it on purpose don't make it no better Janis: 'less I asked for it, obvs Jimmy: Are you? Jimmy: 'Cause if that's a #kinkunlocked I'll have my 🎟 Janis: 🙊 Janis: depends Jimmy: ? Janis: 💀👑 is definitely a freak Janis: probably just encourage her to keep 👀 Jimmy: 🍿 or 📹? Janis: cotton balls soaked in 0cal 'butter' spray Jimmy: 😋😋😋 Janis: though if she were to 📹 wouldn't be the first time Janis: still getting tagged 🙄 Jimmy: #same Janis: hmm, at least your tits aren't low-key out Jimmy: I'll get 'em out tonight Jimmy: Only fair Janis: 😂 Janis: clearly dying to anyway Jimmy: They're 🥇 I gotta keep it #goals Janis: this town ain't big enough for both our heads Jimmy: It's alright, I ain't gonna be here long Janis: Nah? Jimmy: 💔🎻💔 Janis: Yeah, well convincing that one Jimmy: Not on the clock yet Janis: 🍀 you Jimmy: 💀👑 got you plaiting or 💅? Either way you're gonna need some glue Janis: not touching her without gloves Janis: one of your girlfriends is asking about you Jimmy: Duh we'd get caught for the 🔪🔪💀 before we had chance to piss off anywhere Jimmy: Which one? Janis: you're pissing off anyway, I'll have to live, murder and die here Janis: now you're interested Jimmy: Oh come on, baby, where I go, you go 💕 Janis: you can drop me off the first place that isn't here Jimmy: 👌 Janis: kink unlocked Janis: have a 🎟 Jimmy: Common sense ain't one Janis: don't tell me what my kinks are and aren't, boy Janis: you're not in control like that Jimmy: I'm 👮🚔 remember Jimmy: might be a kink division Janis: you are ridiculous Janis: and garda ain't telling me nothing Jimmy: I ain't a paddy, law's different up North, that'll be why it's grim Janis: I've seen the procedurals, mate Janis: you aren't old and grizzled enough to be the maverick Jimmy: Stop flirting with me Jimmy: You'll make the driver 😳 Janis: 🤞 you crash, of course Jimmy: Not unless it's right outside yours and you can throw yourself in front as we do Jimmy: 💀💀💀 pact not 👻 me and widow you Janis: but you love black Janis: but fine, I'll throw myself on the wreckage Jimmy: on me, give a shit what you wear, hun Janis: fine, I'll go play dress up with them Janis: good luck faking 😍 then Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: 1. PJs or I ain't coming in Jimmy: 2. maybe I wanna be pretty an' all, bit rude not to wait for the love of your life Jimmy: 3. 🥇 or nowt Janis: 1. admit you care more Janis: 2. you're pretty enough, sweetheart Janis: 3. 💪 Jimmy: More than what? Janis: just more than you protesting Jimmy: About what? Janis: that you don't give a shit what I wear Janis: you started a # Jimmy: Mr Lucas gives a shit what you wear, I just fake it Janis: real mvp Janis: he'd be way more buzzing my parents were out Jimmy: probably a bit late to invite him Jimmy: I reckon I'm here near enough Janis: know how you feel about threesomes Janis: I'll come find you Jimmy: first off, it were you who 🚫 my proposition for us and that dickhead of yours to have one Jimmy: second, you better had, you did 🤞 Janis: Was not Janis: and he's not MY dickhead, just a dickhead, don't put that on me Janis: [meeting him dramatically 'cos they watching, turning her eyes up to the window so he can see] Jimmy: [we know he's gonna go with it and we know why so] Janis: [we all know you're both grateful for an excuse to kiss each other on sight] Jimmy: [pick her up boy even though you'll have to put down what you're carrying #priorities] Janis: [when y'all would NEVER let a man lmao] Jimmy: [we all know y'all are lowkey like DON'T TOUCH ME] Janis: [tbf a boy was like i can pick you up when i was like 13 and i was like you can't and then he tried and was like oh you're heavy rude you're just weak] Jimmy: [I'm so 😡] Janis: [don't need that potential trigger in your life ladies] Jimmy: [I'm dying though like get inside you two, there's never any need to go as hard or long as you do] Janis: [so method lol] Jimmy: [Gotta like throw the food at her as soon as you're inside because a second has passed without being rude and god forbid] Janis: [just judging his choices like hmm 'cos same] Jimmy: [😒 like oi as if he's not just been rude but opening the gin even before there's glasses #calm down] Janis: [raising a brow but not saying anything 'cos you're like yeah, fair, pointing him over to wherever the glasses are so you can fake cook this meal real quick] Jimmy: [raising his own like oh you fancy as if he was just gonna swig it from the bottle forever but pours some into her mouth first because so needed and shamelessly flirty all the time before going to sort glasses like nothing even happened okay] Janis: ['have some decorum, boy' 😏 until he does that then you're like 😳 'tryna get me drunk too' tutting dramatically] Jimmy: [just shakes his head also 😏 at the words and the tuts 'Don't worry, I know, wouldn't be very goals, that'] Janis: [shrugs 'depends'] Jimmy: [gives her a look like I know it would be for you but we don't set the goals] Janis: [looking back 'til the microwave pings and brings you back 'round 'you've seen 'em at parties, right pissheads'] Jimmy: [Shrugs 'You're a lightweight, and we've got content to create' realises that rhymes and does a little flourish in the air like he's writing with a pen cos poet and nerd] Janis: [when you can't help but lol, even though you're trying to 🙄 is creating #content already and making this meal look #aesthetic and #goals for the 'gram before pushing a plate at him like there you go] Jimmy: [control your 😍 over her cute laugh by acting like that food is so interesting and important] Janis: [but don't control it too hard 'cos cringe couples always take pics of each other eating so get ready for your closeup boy] Jimmy: [that's tea and you know they are seeing/interacting with all this nonsense so you gotta go for it] Janis: [hence you know to stay out the kitchen but you won't, like what you need ladies] Jimmy: [thank god they'd hear them coming so he can be like come sit on my lap for a sec as if that's where she's been the whole time, just not practical, I'd throw food all over you by accident boo] Janis: [again, doing things y'all would never do, and we know you two love this so] Jimmy: [like I'mma just feed you something girl let's see how hard we can trigger Mia] Janis: [how you don't lol, just permanent 😏 like living your best life] Jimmy: [we've only just begun to live] Janis: [classic 'oh you've got something here-' and shamelessly caressing his face] Jimmy: [shameless makeout sesh ensues because if you stay now gals you're the ones making it weird] Janis: [clearly overstaying your welcome for slightly too long before making a comment and running off giggling like you're 12] Jimmy: [let you go 🚬 once they're gone boy cos longest uber ride ever] Janis: [truly, the struggle is so real, wait 'til we make you go on the bus that goes all 'round the houses lol] Jimmy: [hasn't invited her cos we back to being rude obvs] Janis: [so charming lol, on the sofa like 😒] Jimmy: [when you're ages and we know it's because you always need all the moments after kissing her] Janis: you want me to pay for 🚬 or what Jimmy: Save the flex for one that's more #relatable to the fans Janis: I asked if you'd got 'em, could've warned me if I weren't getting none, like Jimmy: Come here Janis: You can save it for me Janis: take breaks in shifts Janis: professional Jimmy: Alright Janis: 👌 Janis: soz, btw Jimmy: For what? Janis: not brushing my teeth Janis: know its a big pet peeve Jimmy: used to how minging you are by now, Josephine Janis: if you gave some warning Janis: face hugger Jimmy: soz I can't always hear 💀👑's bones creaking, bit deaf, me Jimmy: might be the one ear Jimmy: and anyway it depends Janis: It's romantic, you wanna be a great artiste, don't you Janis: and what does it depend on then Jimmy: Why would I wanna be owt of the sort? Jimmy: It depends what lads you've had round before me, what else? Janis: get bitches get money Janis: obvs Janis: I was talking about being mid-dinner, don't act like you didn't know Jimmy: 👌 Janis: will ask about getting that revolving door installed though Janis: tah for the reminder Jimmy: Gracie'll be 👍 when you do Janis: yeah Janis: whole house full of slags, like Jimmy: you do live in the middle of nowt, gotta have something to do Janis: decent excuse Jimmy: only so much horse riding even a rich girl can do Janis: one in the same if you're that kind of rich girl Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: obvs Janis: have to have one to pay for the other Janis: basic maths Jimmy: Alright 🤓 Janis: giving you 💰 tips for nothing here Jimmy: can't take it with me Janis: why not Jimmy: What do you mean? Jimmy: I reckon hell's got a free bar in the very least Janis: Optimistic Janis: I've at least heard that passage, like Janis: you'd be so lucky Jimmy: if you want the pessimistic angle, it'll rot in the ground Jimmy: got that covered Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: [comes back in cos can't be out there forever] Janis: [puts hand out like gimme 'cos obvs you need to leave immediately] Jimmy: [does but also gives her look like bit rude] Janis: [a look like you started it but still saying thanks, not a heathen] Jimmy: [chucks her his jacket/hoodie or whatever even though it's april] Janis: ['good thinking' as she walks out the door] Jimmy: [drink your gin boy] Janis: [clearly taking a cute selfie in that, minus cigarette] Jimmy: [be extra fake to hide how good you think she actually looks please] Janis: [ah the fakery of it all this is fine lollol] Jimmy: [I'm gonna give her a bit then have him come out like he DESPERATELY needs something from his pocket suddenly 1. what even would that be boy 2. no you don't 3. you also don't need to be so hot about it like reaching over her and all that jazz] Janis: [just a LOOK] Jimmy: [when your plan was to just walk away but of course you have to give her a look back] Janis: [offering out the 🚬 like he didn't just have his own, but then doing the sexy blowback moment when he's like okay] Jimmy: [he's just dying now, aren't we all, like didn't expect that did you bitch] Janis: [definition of 😏] Jimmy: [walk away Jimothy you're in too deep] Jimmy: [but I like to imagine he walks into one of the flat whites when he's all flustered, feed that narrative even by accident lads] Janis: [joy of joys, poor boy lol] Janis: you can pick a film Janis: one you might actually wanna watch then one to switch back to Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: 👍 Janis: Brb, I'll go pretend to do what girls do Janis: [comes in but goes upstairs] Jimmy: [we all know he's watching her go, boy be careful] Janis: [we all throwing all the glances like this ain't a dangerous game] Jimmy: [take the time she's upstairs to calm down please and thank you sir] Janis: [we out here brushing out teeth obvs] Jimmy: [so soz Janis but at least being in there can give you the idea for bathgate] Janis: [🔥💡] Jimmy: [what could possibly go wrong like] Janis: [hohahaha] Jimmy: [sending her some of his fave comments from what they've posted so far cos shady bitch] Janis: [likewise 'cos likewise] Janis: wish Dan would comment though Janis: what's he up to Jimmy: 💔💔 Hang on Jimmy: [has a stalk and likewise sends her his fave things he finds] Janis: awh Janis: what a man Jimmy: that his missus? Jimmy: 🔪🔪 Janis: so jealous Janis: learn to be fake happy Jimmy: in a bit, gotta go arrange a 🥇 threesome Jimmy: be really happy after Janis: wait 'til you're off the clock Janis: do whatever you want then Jimmy: UGH Janis: it's mutual Jimmy: 🤞 that's what Dan's girlfriend'll say Janis: she's dating Dan Janis: her lack of sense and taste is obvious and in your favour, congrats Jimmy: I KNOW HE'S SOOOOOOOO 🥇👑😍🏆💪 Jimmy: tah for the #hype babes Jimmy: I reckon now I can 🎯 Janis: [comes down like let's get this over with] Jimmy: [puts on whatever he can bear to watch cos even the flat whites ain't gonna appear that quick] Janis: [and sitting as far apart as you can without it being impossible to be all over each other in 5 secs when needed] Jimmy: [does top up her drink for her though cos isn't as rude as he pretends to be] Janis: [cheers and drinks that too fast] Jimmy: [he's gone the other way and barely touched his because he's like I'm clearly too drunk rn after what happened with the blowbacks] Janis: [ah the confusion and awkwardness] Jimmy: [just on his phone even though he should wanna watch this since he picked it lol] Janis: [getting herself more drink that isn't gin] Jimmy: [wise move babe] Janis: [although mixing perhaps isn't, but rude like that and it isn't as if you've hung with anyone in time now nevermind the clusterfuck of what is this] Jimmy: [Christ knows what he had to drink before he got here so likewise a dickhead and likewise antisocial we know] Janis: [can't leave this forever though have some of 'em run through like we need drinks or whatever they're coming up with, so you gotta low-key launch yourself at him and get into some kind of snuggle position like oh hey but also not hey, only 😍 for him soz] Jimmy: [he changed it to a rom-com cos good reflexes though] Janis: [offering them the gin like I'm such a nice person and I'm so good here 'cos that'll piss Mia off] Jimmy: [when you have to snuggle her extra hard cos you're trying not to lol] Janis: [tickling him 'cos PDA comes in so many forms why are you just watching this lmao] Jimmy: [when he'd be so mad about it but all he can do rn is playfight cos gotta be 😍] Janis: [when you know it so now you're loling too with secret 😏 that only he gonna pick up on] Jimmy: [gotta exploit wherever she's most ticklish like 😏] Janis: [regrets, you have none, even though you're dying] Jimmy: [just having fun working out all the bae's ticklish places like this is so casual] Janis: [all 'oh my god, stop' in that fake ass don't stop way] Jimmy: ['make me' cos we all know what that means haha] Janis: [mmmmmakeout time, take your cue to leave] Jimmy: [when you're so into it you don't notice that they've left for a bit] Janis: [always think that like how you breaking this up just like, anyway] Jimmy: [honestly forever going 0-1000 and back again like this is fine] Janis: [no wonder you going cray] Jimmy: [literally, unrelated but did Mia take that gin or nah? lol] Janis: [I feel like Asia took it like yay and Mia will tell her off lmao] Jimmy: [that's real af so I second it and Grace is gonna drink it cos they are doing her head in] Janis: [when you need to get drunk to enjoy your friend's company, happy days] Jimmy: [when your friends are so obsessed with your sister and her man though] Janis: [soz it's a moment babe] Jimmy: [just you wait til bathgate gals] Janis: [oh lordy] Janis: what else do girls like them like then Janis: 'cos you got to admit, it's a laugh getting to 'em and winding them up Jimmy: [a really cute concentration face while he's thinking] Jimmy: Facemasks? Janis: [hiding your 😍 by pulling a pisstakey face] Janis: alright, but I ain't putting any of the weird shit on they do Janis: especially if I end up looking as rough as them Jimmy: Hang on, I'll go ask Gracie if she's got any of those bollocks sheet ones everyone 📷 themselves in Jimmy: What animal do you wanna be? Janis: 🤔 are you serious Jimmy: 🙀 it is then? Alright, I'll ask Jimmy: [Gets up and heads towards the stairs] Janis: you don't even know what room is hers Jimmy: I'll follow the 😱😱😱 Jimmy: [and is] Janis: your ⚰ Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: I'll chill here and ponder my inevitable grief-fuelled suicide Jimmy: hot Janis: soz you won't be around to 👀 Jimmy: 👻 Janis: a 👻 with a threesome to plan Jimmy: I won't be able to touch nowt so I might as well 👀 you 🔪⚰ Janis: love being 2nd choice Janis: 😏 Jimmy: Dan's missus is 🥈 you're 🥉 my dear Janis: fuck off and hurry up Jimmy: [Comes back with the masks like 😏 and of course puts hers on her even though she easily could herself but gotta have that whole MOMENT of him getting her hair out of the way first cos shamelessly loves touching it] Janis: [when this is somehow more intimate than anything you've done so far so you're like where do I put my eyes] Jimmy: [they're really sticky though and he isn't expecting it so he's like wtf and grossed out but then amused at himself and it's so cute bye] Janis: [yeah they're gross she's probably horrified so that'll break the tension just like what the fuck but lol too] Jimmy: [he's genuinely smiling and loling for the first time since god knows when] Janis: [when he's so cute you have to slap this ridiculous on his face fast] Jimmy: [what animals should they be? I think he should be a 🐼 cos lol] Janis: [that's a popular one, we can say there was a 🐱 'cos why not] Jimmy: [yass take your nerdy selfies lads] Janis: [when they'd still look cute too, arseholes] Jimmy: [I'm as fuming about that as Grace would be that he came to her room when she's been hiding all night] Janis: [things are only gonna get worse soz gurl] Janis: this is a great poker face Janis: [says something #shocking and ridiculous with the dead face it gives you to prove the point] Jimmy: [when you lol and yours slips cos they do and they are crap but you take it off and throw it at her anyway cos it's wet and gross and you hate it] Jimmy: decent weapon an' all Janis: [throwing it right back like excuse me] Janis: you're a child Jimmy: @iantaylor8 Janis: if you wanna go home, phones over there, baby Janis: [throws the masks in the direction of like an animal] Jimmy: [moves like he's gonna get up and go but nudges her playfully instead like what's next] Janis: [ponders seriously] Janis: I need to get this gunk off me Janis: [pulls him up like follow me, does not need to be hand-holding but are going upstairs so you know, just in case] Jimmy: [love it and so does he] Janis: [I say get in that bathroom] Jimmy: [gets in the bath like he did at the party just watching her sort her face out] Janis: [looking at him via the mirror like what are you doing but amused not annoyed] Jimmy: [hits her with a 'What?' like he's not shamelessly looking at her] Janis: [nods like 'you want me to run that or?'] Jimmy: [just reclining in there like a nerd and shrugs] Janis: [shakes her head and comes over, acts like she's leaning over to turn the shower on, but doesn't and instead gets in the other end like, see why you like it so much] Jimmy: [does a hand movement like he's splashing her with imaginary water cos oi] Janis: ['nerd' 😏 but reclining and putting her feet in her lap like don't mind me] Janis: his* Jimmy: [just being soft instead doing the this little pig went to market thing to her toes quietly like it's meant to be under his breath but it's not his own funny version probably cos he is a nerd] Janis: [just letting this be even though being soft freaks you the fuck out on the low 'you're so weird, new kid' under her own but nudging him just in case he's forgotten that that's a ref and not a massive drag] Jimmy: [shakes his head like ah good times cos he obvs remembers 'feels like ages ago that'] Janis: ['yeah' and pausing 'cos truly, so much going down in such a short space of time 'didn't think you'd still be here- not in my bath, like'] Jimmy: [nods cos same] Janis: [when you feel the mood shift so you're like away from that topic 'we'll always have the playlist'] Jimmy: [he obvs puts it on cos that bitch but quietly so Mia and Co don't hear it over their music or film or whatever and judge] Janis: [just like what kinda mood music lol, just grooving lowkey 'well worth the A'] Jimmy: [😍 cos I can't stop him if she's gonna be that much of a babe] Janis: [hitting him back with a 'what?' but in a challenging kinda way] Jimmy: [getting out of the tub like he's just remembered he's still got that mask residue on his face which true but like you don't have to literally deal with it this second] Janis: [just stretching out and back, closing her eyes] Jimmy: [taking his t-shirt off cos he said he'd get his tits out and also it means he can throw it at her playfully before washing his face] Janis: [shook and then 😠 'it stinks' and throwing it back like okay it so clearly doesn't babe] Jimmy: [😏 to hide the fact you're lowkey worried that you do smell like oh no and because you're awks and you don't want her to know, pulling her up to sit on the edge of the bath so you can take a selfie kissing her whilst topless for the fans because that's as far as your contribution to bathgate has got so far] Jimmy: [but then you stop to make sure the bath looks aesthetic and generally faff like she did with the food earlier so excuse to go again for the re-do] Janis: [taking it and reposting it on your story with 😍 over his nips] Jimmy: [🙄 even though you're actually amused cos can't let that show] Janis: ['you wanna be x-rated?' at the 🙄] Jimmy: [Gives her a look like well that depends what you mean even though he knows she ain't suggesting they get x-rated 'cause cheeky like that] Janis: [winks but then gets off of the edge of the bath, going through wherever all the bath lotions and potions are kept 'run it hot, lover boy'] Jimmy: [raises an eyebrow but obviously does and draws the infamous love heart with JJ inside in the steam on the mirror] Janis: [bringing over an armful of shit and picking a bottle and pouring a stupid amount in, looking at him like, fill your boots] Jimmy: [when you have fun putting loads of shit in like when you're a kid and you make potions] Janis: [Grace gon' be fuming again, so soz but not really, when there's an aesthetic amount of bubbles and colour going on, taking a deep breath and hoping you did that quiet enough as you take your clothes off like in we get] Jimmy: [puts loud music on so you can pretend you're busy with that not 👀 at her] Janis: [at least there's sooo many bubbles to artfully place lol this is fine this is normal] Jimmy: [when you wanna be like are you sure because you're a soft good boy but you also don't wanna ask because it's gotta be all so fake and you don't care so you're just lowkey taking an age outside that tub pretending it's because you're getting the lighting and angles right and bollocks like that] Janis: [just letting him 'cos not trying to be a pushy bitch but also like, well I've done it now boy so 'you can leave your pants on' but in a tone of, again, I haven't so] Jimmy: [well we know he won't and doesn't cos there's a challenge there and they are always accepted] Janis: [when you don't wanna 👀 but also don't wanna make a massive point of turning away 'cos that's not chill and idgaf attitude so you focus on looking at his face and then instantly regret that 'cos eye contact like oh, we doing this] Jimmy: [such intense eye contact being maintained like okay we just eye fucking rn this is fine] Janis: [when anything and everything you could possibly say rn sounds like double entendre, like is it hot enough for you etc, so you just settle for 'okay?'] Jimmy: [can only nod because likewise can't trust himself to speak atm] Janis: [taking a picture of the bath setup to be like #boydonegood about it but you know you're just buying time before the actual show of it all] Jimmy: [letting that happen because not gonna be a dick about it] Janis: ['you're the photographer, how do we get the best shot?'] Jimmy: [you move boy because we don't need to force her to and have a bubble nip slip when we've only just begun but like obvs position her however you do need to because we're obvs taking this very seriously here and the cute concentration face is back] Janis: [just shamelessly watching him work, but definitely moving closer than he positioned you like is this okay, testing those limits honey] Jimmy: [just says 'Alright' like are you asking her as a question or are you saying you are or are you like we're ready, what's the truth Jimothy] Janis: ['is it?'] Jimmy: ['isn't it?' Boy you're so annoying] Janis: [splashes him, using the water to mess up his hair appropriately 'just take the photo then'] Jimmy: [when you're gonna be like 😒 oi but that's actually a good idea when it clicks what she's doing and you take the shameless excuse to be like 'hang on' and run your wet hands through her hair too and we all see you taking your time with that] Janis: [just not breathing 'til he's done 'how do we look?' and a LOOK 'cos you can see how he looks] Jimmy: ['you look-' only breaking that LOOK to stare at her lips honey 'goals, obvs' eventually gets said because focus boy but it's so not what he was gonna say goodbye] Janis: [when you're so frustrated the 'come on then' comes out so easily] Jimmy: [taking so many pics from so many different angles and kissing her in so many different ways like do you need to be this extra, the answer is no but also yes] Janis: [when you're going in, like you're ever uploading more than one of these each like yes, we need all these options] Jimmy: [like we all know at certain points the camera ain't even taking pics but they haven't noticed/ do not care] Janis: [we all know with the amount of shit you put in its gonna be slippery as hell so gonna allow you to legit slip further onto him without it being a shameless oopsies moment] Jimmy: [add to that how good it would feel to not just be stopping and starting like you've had to all night #dangerous] Janis: [when the pretense of making noise for them is so thin at this point like okay] Jimmy: [regretting putting that loud music on now aren't you boy because yeah good luck not making all the sounds ever rn that only she can hear] Janis: [we know no one is stopping to turn it down rn] Jimmy: [they wouldn't stop if the bath fell through the ceiling rn lol] Janis: [true that, just gently pulling him down so he's laying on her like are you even in frame] Jimmy: [we know he's not and nobody's bothered god bless] Janis: [how far are we letting this go/how do we stop 'em lol] Jimmy: [that's what I'm thinking cos like someone could knock on the bathroom door like excuse you but that might just encourage them more depending on who they think it is] Jimmy: [maybe one of them actually could slip because actually perilous?] Janis: [orrr what if they didn't actually lock the door 'cos when you're faking it'd be bants if they walked in but now it ain't so you'll both be mad] Jimmy: [AMAZING we simply must] Janis: [💀#2 enter] Jimmy: [when you literally can't get out of that bath regardless of what happens because too turned on and even if you grab a towel that's not really gonna hide anything so you're just like ...........] Janis: [at least you can take the lead like get the fuck out bitch Jimmy: [he'd be actually shook though cos like this early on there's a part of him that still doesn't realise how far the flat whites are willing to take shit but then oh hey girl] Janis: [they're just so immature truly, like when Liv was like WE'RE NOT IN YEAR 11 ANYMORE' to Mini lmao like y'all are but still, we're mature laydeez now] Jimmy: [honestly, Grace and Janis would have a reason to be stuck cos their sister died when they were 12, what's y'alls] Janis: [#eatingdisordersquad Jimmy: [And Mia's weird daddy's girl energy ew] Janis: [this is why y'all are only friends with each other, lordy] Jimmy: [I'm intrigued to know what Ava thinks because she didn't exist before and like] Janis: [she'd think they were really tragic and cringe but it's not like she has to hang with them longer than the odd event like Grace's bdays so she wouldn't be like umm your friends] Jimmy: [poor Grace in a toxic relationship with someone for a decade that she doesn't even get to bang] Janis: [come get your toxic friend 'fore she get drowned lmao] Jimmy: [you know Mia would cos can't resist] Janis: [well that's that ruined, just getting out towels and taking one so he can get dried in some semblance of privacy, like] Jimmy: [the levels of fuming] Janis: [some time] Janis: my room is upstairs again Jimmy: 👌 Janis: but if you wanna go Janis: get that Jimmy: And let 💀👑 win? Piss off Jimmy: You're the 🙀 Janis: How am I Jimmy: You scare easily, we worked that out ages ago Janis: Bollocks, you take the piss and have done for ages Jimmy: How do I? Janis: not scared of anything Janis: least of all 💀s Jimmy: Easy to 🗨 Janis: Not as easy to live Janis: but I manage Jimmy: Can you manage to think of owt that'll pay her back or what? Jimmy: You said they'll crash before us Janis: I'm thinking Janis: sure could make her piss herself or shave off her eyebrows but not 12 and it needs to be something better Jimmy: Duh Janis: Clearly not that duh Janis: can't blame 'em for lacking the mental capacities I guess but still will Jimmy: Can't think of nowt when you're starving to 💀💀💀 Jimmy: #relatable Janis: you're thinking of your stomach rn Jimmy: Yeah? Janis: so fat Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: convention down the hall, go learn some tips Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Hope you're dressed this time Jimmy: They don't so I obvs am Janis: Exactly Janis: probably time for more desperate measures Janis: restraining orders all 'round Jimmy: When should I date yours for, Jules? Jimmy: About a week from now or? Janis: Suits me Janis: works both ways Jimmy: 👍 Janis: where are you actually Janis: it's sinister creepin' about like a 👻 Jimmy: ? Janis: I like to know where everyone is Janis: know where to avoid Janis: don't need repeats Jimmy: I'm outside Jimmy: Avoid the 🚬☁ Janis: Will do Janis: add it to the score I'm keeping though Jimmy: Or just keep up Janis: I'm avoiding your secondhand smoke Janis: put it behind your ear, I'll find it Jimmy: Like I said 🙀 you Jimmy: And you're meant to inhale not bite down Jimmy: so I probably won't put it there Janis: Now who's the pussy Janis: and you told me to Janis: not standing the opposite end of the garden like an overgrown gnome Jimmy: still you then Jimmy: dark's nowt to be scared of, babe Janis: stop saying I'm scared, dickhead Janis: I'm just not a smoker Jimmy: since when, dickhead? Janis: since forever Jimmy: Bollocks Janis: I'm a convincing fake, I know Janis: nothing real about me, remember? Jimmy: 🙄👏🏆 Janis: not that impressive a quote, honestly Janis: you've said better Jimmy: You've done better Janis: 💔 Janis: so sorry Jimmy: I'll be here with the orchestra lads Jimmy: [sends her a little vid of him doing a 🎻 mime] Janis: 🙄😏 Janis: keep that one between us Janis: dunno what that'd imply about the last post but nothing good Jimmy: ❌ my 💘 Janis: deflate your ego more like Janis: can't have you walking 'round like pinhead Jimmy: What ego? Janis: 🙊 Jimmy: Fake dating you, aren't I? Janis: Yeah Janis: you're so lucky Jimmy: Desperate more like Janis: That's obvious Jimmy: Gotta keep it #goals baby Jimmy: 😍😍🤤🤤 Jimmy: can't get enough ever, me Janis: Already said you're fat Janis: preferences in common with them is no surprise to me Jimmy: actually 💔 Jimmy: will have to go home for a 😭😭 Janis: Enjoy Janis: 👋 Jimmy: Enjoy your 🚬 oh wait nah Jimmy: Enjoy the IOU Jimmy: 🏃 Janis: Like you're the only boy with bad habits and a lighter Jimmy: Cavemen invented 🔥 so you'll be grand 🍀 girl Jimmy: if you 🍑📞 party boy now I can kick his uber soon as he gets out, job done Janis: I wanna be disappointed twice in one day like you wanna hang 'round this place Jimmy: so crack on Janis: Funny Jimmy: the joke is I'm still waiting for you to think up a proper idea to piss off them lot Jimmy: sort it out Janis: night's still young Janis: and where's your idea Jimmy: I get it, I look half decent for 45, stop flirting with me and concentrate Janis: What ego? Jimmy: 😏 Janis: I don't know Janis: the problem is everything pisses them off Janis: Grace cries at the drop of a hat, for fuck's sake Janis: it's too easy Jimmy: Alright, what if we give 'em something they really want instead Janis: Self-esteem and good hair? Jimmy: Something they reckon they want but they don't want from us Jimmy: Your gin trick but amplified Jimmy: 💀💀💀 with 💕 Janis: I see what you're saying Janis: bit too soon to hand out invites to the fake wedding Janis: but if you can stomach it, we can give them the attention they're after Jimmy: 🥇 me Jimmy: Nowt I can't handle Jimmy: Or stomach 'cause I'm obvs such a fat git Janis: if the XXL fits Janis: right, let's go invite ourselves to the sleepover, then 🤢 Jimmy: But it looks better on you, girl 💕 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: you just wanna get your tits out again Jimmy: for you 😘 Janis: I'm sure I won't be able to keep my hands off you, covered titties and company be damned Jimmy: Hang on Jimmy: What if this backfires? Jimmy: might reckon I'm bored of you and wanna swap you for my truest love Jimmy: bit too real that Janis: You'll have to resist flirting with them, obviously Janis: but you aren't any good at it so I doubt that'll be an issue Janis: just try not to embarrass yourself Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: I'm just saying if we're so 💕😍😘 why are we getting involved in their bollocks? Janis: Because, I'm such a nice person, and we're so sorry and so embarrassed about earlier? Jimmy: make it at least make fake sense, Jasmine Jimmy: But alright Janis: I don't wanna fuck any of them Janis: sorry 'bout it Janis: I don't know how else you reckon we can 💀💀💀 with 💕 Janis: soz you think you saw us fucking gift baskets Jimmy: Alright, shut up, I might be overthinking it Jimmy: Soz I'm proper 🧠 Janis: What was that about fake sense? Jimmy: What was that about you doing shit 'cause I told you to? Jimmy: 🤐 mate Janis: That's only when I wanted to do the thing anyway Janis: great at giving me excuses, you Jimmy: You wanna have a lovely chat with 'em all then, do you? Jimmy: Sound Janis: suit you if I did Janis: any excuse to ruin their night Jimmy: Suit me if we didn't have to do any talking Jimmy: I'm that romantic, obvs Janis: Done that part Janis: and you were given an out so you've got no room to complain Jimmy: Where and when was I? Janis: I've literally told you to piss off three times Jimmy: And I've told you I ain't letting 💀👑 reckon she scared me off Jimmy: Or reckon I just leave after we're done like every lad she hasn't 🐍 Janis: Alright, your choice Janis: why do you wanna look like an 😇 Jimmy: Why do you want me to look like a twat? Janis: It doesn't make you seem like a twat Jimmy: It makes it seem like a 🍑📞 that ain't what this is Janis: Obviously not Janis: we are love's young dream 🙄 Janis: my parents are only on a date night themselves though so we're gonna have to get in my room and hide you sooner rather than later Jimmy: If you want me to go, say that Janis: I don't care what you do Janis: I'm stuck regardless Janis: just saying, it's a rule, you said that Jimmy: What it is is a 🥇 excuse not to make the 💀💀💀 with 💕 a well slow death Janis: Come on then Janis: mercy kill it is Jimmy: [Appears like the 👻 he is] Janis: [avoiding eye contact like it's your job, just a nod like alright and making your way to Grace's room] Jimmy: [pulling her back like hold my hand bitch] Janis: [Clove has entered the chat, also Winnie] Jimmy: [don't think about how he'd look in whatever he packed to wear to sleep] Janis: [don't you think about it ladies, low-key giving 'em evils even though you gotta be nice Jimmy: [I'm loling because Mia would want to tell them to fuck off cos fuming he's still here but what Grace says goes because it's her house bitch and we know she loves Janis more than you so] Janis: [when you're tipsy and just happy they're here to save your night 'cos your friends have just been talking about 'em and boring you lol] Jimmy: [honestly] Jimmy: [they should be painting their nails because ofc and Grace be like offering to do Janis' cos ILY and Jimmy's like I'll do it cos that's the kind of pinterest bullshit but like he'd obvs do a good job cos artsy hoe and pick a colour she actually fucks with] Janis: [just prolonging hand-holding, we all see you boy] Jimmy: [return of the adorable concentration face] Janis: [we love to see it, when we're sneaking peeps] Jimmy: [Grace putting it on her story to do the work for you lads, Mia be raging] Janis: [hohaha, also blatantly gotta paint his 🖤] Jimmy: [Asia offering him the dregs of the gin back but he's like 'I'm alright' and 😍 at Janis cos so #nice and #lovedup bye] Janis: [smuggest happy face] Jimmy: [a little kiss that you so don't need to give her] Janis: [all pouting like you didn't gatecrash their night] Jimmy: [soz Grace you've done nothing wrong tonight but your friends suck] Janis: [we all know she's having more fun now like soz we're just doing this to piss 'em off] Jimmy: [nothing could ever piss Mia off more than how obvs it is that Grace would rather hang out with JJ so thanks babe] Janis: [doing us a solid] Jimmy: [what other cringe activities can we make coupley af?] Janis: [we could play some kind of game, as they are that childish, idk what] Jimmy: [Mia could suggest like never have I ever or something to that effect cos they're all hoes and they think Janis is such a virgin so she wants to show her up] Janis: [that's a good idea, and they could keep saying really mushy romantic things like #awh 'cos that'll really piss her off] Jimmy: [turn it around on her cos you've never had a bf have you babe so] Janis: [awkwar silence descends lmao] Jimmy: [soz again Grace] Janis: [Asia got her man god bless] Jimmy: [Grace would so end up going off to the bathroom or wherever upset so Mia would be buzzing] Janis: 😬 Janis: she doesn't have feelings to hurt Jimmy: You should go after her before 💀👑 does Jimmy: proper 😇 Janis: Ugh Janis: pains me that you're right Janis: on so many levels Janis: [goes] Jimmy: oughta be used to it by now, mate Janis: 1. ha Janis: 2. it's more about how badly I don't want to console her than it is about admitting you've ever had a good idea Janis: 3. massive headed twat Jimmy: Duh Jimmy: And I miss you already too Janis: you can run down a single flight of stairs and not get winded, yeah Janis: should you need to 🔪🔪🔪🔪 Jimmy: Is the 🔪 in my back or nah? Janis: I dunno where they'll wanna stick it first, babe Jimmy: hot Janis: if you say so Jimmy: I've still got a 💀💀💀 wish, baby, where's yours gone? Janis: you clearly don't get how much it kills me being nice to my sister Jimmy: I never said owt about being nice Jimmy: 💀👑 wouldn't be if she'd taken the job off you Janis: I'm not gonna give her a pep talk about how more dick the better either, tah Jimmy: Get your boyfriend on the line, he'll be up for having a go Janis: You're very helpful Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: Be why Asia's asking me how to make her lad more #goals Janis: She's shameless Janis: sadly don't have his # either or I'd dob her in Jimmy: @ [whatever his actual socials are idk because of course he knows that the shady bitch] Janis: 😂 okay gossip girl Jimmy: xoxo Janis: 😏 Janis: I'll anon it at him Janis: as I've got a rep as such a nice person Jimmy: 👍 Janis: oh Janis: he's unfortunate looking Jimmy: Did you think he'd be more 🤴 than 🐸? Jimmy: Come on Janis: 🐸 is generous Janis: tadpole, like Janis: I thought he'd at least have to be fit Janis: if she was airing you Jimmy: Piss off Janis: SHE 👏 HAS 👏 A 👏 BOYFRIEND 👏 Jimmy: I hate you Janis: Yeah yeah Jimmy: come back Janis: they're being that bad huh Jimmy: whatever you wanna call trying to dance with me, that'll do Janis: how horrific Janis: pick up your phone Janis: [calling him so they can hear being like 'we need your help to carry this' 'cos gone to make hot chocolates to cheer her] Jimmy: [a coupley af phone moment because those couples who stay on the phone til he's literally a step away from her] Janis: [nerds] Jimmy: [gives Mia the biggest mug like fuck you] Janis: [definitely put loads of baileys in and cream the whole works like drink up bitch] Jimmy: [chin chin gals] Janis: [sipping like 😏 getting cream moustaches then smooching 'em off, disgusting] Jimmy: [also they should dance cos he refused to dance with y'all] Janis: [obvs] Jimmy: [her like nah so he can be like oh please I really wanna, just to really annoy them] Janis: ['cos real also what a mental image like are you all gonna watch or are you gonna dance with each other like what's going on gals] Jimmy: [gaaaaaaaay] Janis: [just bopping sadly alone with your hot chocolate, amusement] Jimmy: [we all know Jimothy just wants to pick her up again so] Janis: [please 'fall' down onto the bed like whoops what are we like] Jimmy: [100%] Janis: [Mia's eyes boutta pop out] Jimmy: [Also Asia should 100% get a call from her man rn] Jimmy: [Jimmy trying not to cackle] Janis: [just biting your tongue so hard] Janis: 🙈 Jimmy: we need to go Janis: you don't wanna witness the downfall of your nemesis? Janis: I can always tickle you again Jimmy: You can try 💪 Janis: [does 'cos being that annoying like soz you're on the phone we're just so 😍] Jimmy: [lets it happen because he needs to lol and NO other reason NOPE] Janis: [try not to cackle lads] Jimmy: [HAS TO kiss her so he doesn't again no other reason so] Janis: [definitely not actually enjoying that, definitely doesn't have to stop it kinda abruptly 'cos will get carried away, no] Jimmy: [when you're like ? but you can't say or do anything because that audience but then 💡 you quickly trace an o and a k on her with a question mark sneakily like because I love when he does that] Janis: [just squeezing his hand like a yeah but drawing a 😒 face] Jimmy: [a genuine smile even though he should also be 😒] Janis: [I think Asia should run out to talk with her mans then come in crying so they can leave lol] Jimmy: [#mood] Janis: [ended that relationship whoops, run and lol run and lol] Jimmy: [don't be too happy tho boy you don't want her to think you actually wanna get with Asia] Janis: [she's gonna be on you harder than ever boy, oh my, like new boy guess what, god bless] Jimmy: [oh lord imagine] Janis: [at least she's not 💀👑 levels of snek, just dumb and tragic] Jimmy: [lowkey reminds him of his ex not in a 😍 way lol] Janis: [oh dear, getting to where the stairs are like 'lounge or my room?'] Jimmy: [shrug because can't answer a question] Janis: [nudges him like make a decision, boy] Jimmy: [nudges her back like no you] Janis: [looks at her non-existent watch and then pulls him up the stairs to her room] Jimmy: [off you go lads] Janis: [like cali could be home at any moment but not really #shameless] Jimmy: [you two and your flimsy excuses, love it] Janis: [is this the first time in her room?] Jimmy: [yeah because the other first time we did is when they actually hook up if memory serves so way after this] Janis: [enjoy that, boy] Jimmy: [we know his is no better and he can't judge] Janis: [at least there's shit still there from when you cared, shrugs and gestures 'round just like put some music on, do what you want] Jimmy: [👀 around like he's a nosy bitch but actually just doesn't know what to do with himself] Janis: ['you found plenty to fake do down there' 😏 but masking that you are awks too] Jimmy: [gets a pen and paper and starts doodling giving her a look like you happy now? all 😏 cos so awks] Janis: [sticks her tongue out at him, laying down and scrolling her phone 'cos we know it's popping off from #bathgate] Jimmy: [throws a paper airplane at her] Janis: ['excuse me?' sitting up, resting on her elbows like so #shook 'I'm checking we're still relevant, can I help you?'] Jimmy: [gives her a look cos they both know there's no need to check and it's all happening rn like my boo said] Janis: [mimes his head blowing up bigger and bigger then exploding, we all know she was just looking at the pictures again shh] Jimmy: [mimes a gun to his head then a dramatic fake death] Janis: [crawls over to where he is like she's gonna lick up the blood] Jimmy: [does a 🕆 with his fingers cos she such a vampire] Janis: [mimes a hiss like how dare you] Jimmy: [sets up a game of hangman on the paper and pushes it over to her] Janis: [😏 and writes down 'I?'] Jimmy: [---- -I-- - -I-- I -I-] Janis: ['E'] Jimmy: [---- -I-- - -I-- I -IE] Janis: ['D' 'cos got your number boy] Jimmy: [---- -I-- - -I-- I DIE] Janis: [lols 'L'] Jimmy: [what bit do you draw first when there isn't I've forgotten] Janis: [the pole that goes up] Janis: [pouts 'S'] Jimmy: [---S -I-- - -ISS I DIE] Janis: ['K' 'cos also got your number and a LOOK] Jimmy: [---S -I-- - KISS I DIE and blowing her a kiss IRL like we gotta keep this sassy and light] Janis: [buzzing 'cos you gonna win lol 'A'] Jimmy: [---S -I-- A KISS I DIE] Janis: ['T'] Jimmy: [T--S -IT- A KISS I DIE] Janis: [fills in the rest because now obvious 'THUS WITH A KISS I DIE' 😏 and also hanging the stickman still and making him look like him with shades and floppy hair and a leather jacket] Jimmy: [draws a stick person her crying but also a vicar and they've both got rings on and there's confetti and she's wearing a wedding veil etc cos throwback to the easter rising when she married that dude] Janis: [draws a union jack flag in the vicar's hand, then a knife in his 💘 and then draws a vial under her tears with ☠ and 'POISON' on the label] Jimmy: [😏] Janis: [adds vampire fangs to herself and two little holes on his hanged neck like excuse me thank you] Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [lays back down 'what else do you wanna play?'] Jimmy: [lies down too LOOKING at her 'What do you wanna play?'] Janis: [stops breathing for a sec, bye but turns it into serious thinking face] Jimmy: [just staring at her, waiting but like why you gotta be so hot doing that boy] Janis: ['don't have any new games' casting her eyes over to whatever the last console she got was before she stopped giving a shit about everything 'you can talk about girls for-' invisible watch again '-five minutes, if you wanna, northern boy'] Jimmy: [talks about how much he hates Mia for a 5 minute rant lol, lying down staring up at the ceiling] Janis: [when you're so 😍 unironically thank god he's not looking] Jimmy: [nudges her when he's done like it's your go] Janis: [quick snap into a 😏 'you stole my bitch' and nudging him back then turning her eyes to the ceiling and talking about Grace instead] Jimmy: [takes his turn to talk about 💀#2 because still fuming about bathgate not that he's gonna rant about that, be careful please] Janis: [just nodding like mhmm preach then takes her turn to talk about Asia but like, try not to mention you're potentially jealous of her 'cos he might like her] Jimmy: [throws something at her like he's so offended she's slagging off his bae] Janis: ['so chivalrous!' 'cos he hit her with whatever she's now gonna hit him back with, let us assume a pillow fight for the cliche] Jimmy: [yas we need that shameless flirty MOMENT] Janis: [doing it, pinning him and tickling him like 'admit you love Asia'] Jimmy: [when you just flip reverse it 💪 so you're doing the same to her 'admit you're jealous of our true love'] Janis: [getting out a 'never!' between your lols] Jimmy: [opening and closing his mouth cos was blatantly gonna say something but then aborted mission] Janis: [reaching up and opening and closing his mouth yourself a few times like a 🐟 'catching flies, Taylor?'] Jimmy: [just sniffing her dramatically like 🤔 and giving her a look like you're not that bad] Janis: [punches his arm but vaguely affectionately lol 'how could either of us stink after that bath full of shit'] Jimmy: ['answered your own question there'] Janis: ['We smell like unicorn farts and rainbow dreams, obviously, did you not read the labels?] Jimmy: ['Too Northern'] Janis: ['Too distracted' under your breath like who said that] Jimmy: ['What?' Even though he 100% heard] Janis: ['See' and poking him in the chest like, you just proved my point there, not paying attention] Jimmy: [moves her finger down to his stomach shaking his head like he's so hungry and deprived of promised snacks that he can't possibly survive nevermind concentrate] Janis: [🙄 and poking his stomach harder, bit rude, 'come on then fatty' and wriggling out from under him, where she still is btw, gesturing like come on] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna leave this room and risk seeing either flat whites or her parents so you've got such a lil pout on 'shit host, you'] Janis: [a look like really 'lazy and all, chat shit about my rich girl work ethic ever again...' 😏 and goes to forage] Jimmy: [throws the pillow at her as she goes cos so mature] Janis: I'm taking all the good snacks now Jimmy: I'll have 'em off your 💀💀💀 body when you get 🔪🔪 Jimmy: bit of blood ain't gonna hurt nowt Janis: I've turned you Janis: not gay Janis: just vampire Janis: should've had your ear off and ended you there and then Jimmy: brb gotta send that tweet Jimmy: #notgayjustvampire Jimmy: what a read Janis: you would wanna be that couple Janis: not rawring at people with you Jimmy: I've got the fucking 💅 for it Janis: deny that you love it Jimmy: You really want me to throw my 💕 about tonight, eh? Janis: Not calling you a slag Janis: or am I Jimmy: can do Jimmy: be a misread but what ain't with you Janis: Doesn't feel like a #kinkunlocked to me Janis: and you're the one who claims he can't Jimmy: Claim I can't do loads of things but here we are Janis: Total opposite, bighead Janis: so rare you aren't bigging yourself up like the complex is so real Jimmy: you wish Jimmy: I get that it would be easier to fake this if I was more your type but 💔 Janis: You can't say I haven't faked it perfectly Janis: everyone believes it Jimmy: That weren't what I were saying Janis: What were you saying then, elaborate Jimmy: for a start that the locked door ain't the only appeal of a bathroom for your boyfriend Jimmy: 🎻 that every surface weren't mirrored Janis: 🙄 Why do you keep bringing him up Jimmy: Why don't you want me to? Janis: because I don't like thinking about him, never mind talking about him Janis: he's at a lot of parties, I'm sure you'll get a chance to see him again, like calm down Jimmy: It weren't me who wanted to 👀 that dickhead Janis: Me either, obviously Janis: well busy looking at myself, does that suit you? Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: What? Jimmy: What? Janis: What would you like me to say? That I love him? Or even fancy him? 'Cos I don't so I'm not going to just 'cos you need me to, for some reason Jimmy: Why would I need that? Janis: You tell me Jimmy: It's bollocks Janis: Then you can stop bringing him up Jimmy: I can do what I like, tah Janis: Alright, be obsessed with him Janis: I don't have to listen Jimmy: keep being a dickhead Jimmy: you obvs can't help it Janis: 🙄 Janis: good one Janis: I never said I weren't and I've done fuck all wrong Jimmy: 👍 Janis: fuck's sake Jimmy: I'm just gonna go Jimmy: They don't need to know I have Janis: Fine Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I'll get you a ride Jimmy: It's alright Janis: don't be stupid Jimmy: I said it's alright Janis: I got you out here, I can get you back too Jimmy: I can get myself back, I'm in no rush Janis: The buses have stopped coming out this way and you are miles from yours Janis: take the ride Jimmy: Leave it out Janis: Why are you being a dickhead for Jimmy: Me? Jimmy: Yeah, alright Janis: Yeah, you Janis: if you don't want the ride, then use my bed and wait 'til the AM Janis: you'll be left alone Jimmy: I don't want your bed either Janis: then take another one, this house is filled with fucking empty ones Jimmy: that's not creepy Janis: I have siblings that've fucked off Janis: that's all Janis: guest rooms are the reward for having lots of kids Jimmy: bit late for my dad to crack on there but I'll @ him any road Janis: never too late for blokes Jimmy: Northern 40s is rest of the world's 90s Janis: Still Jimmy: Still, he can't keep a bird for any length Jimmy: it's all stacking up Janis: you're gutted, clearly Janis: who doesn't want nine brothers and sisters Jimmy: Love raising his kids for him, me Jimmy: Why not do it a load more times? Got nowt else on Janis: After the 5th you can delegate Janis: your sister is definitely old enough Jimmy: Tah for the insider trading tips Janis: what are friends for Jimmy: Do you want a real or fake answer? Janis: why would you need to fake it Janis: not being wire-tapped here Jimmy: I might be wearing one 👮🚔 Janis: Her word is only law if you've not got the upper body strength or brain function to fight her off Janis: so go ahead Jimmy: You admitting I have? Janis: I'm admitting I'd know if you were working for or with Mia Janis: she's not as smart as she thinks and I'm not a fucking idiot Jimmy: And I ain't got enough upper body strength or brain function for that many jobs Jimmy: fucking hell Janis: You're exhausted just thinking about it Janis: relatable Jimmy: I'm sorry for bringing him up, alright? Janis: Alright Janis: I just don't get it Janis: like yeah it was a dick move but you don't reckon I was punished thoroughly enough or what? Jimmy: it's nowt like that Jimmy: I just Janis: Well it's alright, forget about it Jimmy: maybe I don't get it an' all Janis: Yeah Janis: I get that Jimmy: Do you? Janis: 'course Janis: much as it pains me to admit I don't know everything, like Jimmy: I won't send that tweet Janis: Cheers Jimmy: come back Janis: Okay Janis: [back with the snacks] Jimmy: [going through 'em so you don't have to look at her rn] Janis: ['Jimmy'] Jimmy: [raising his head like ?] Janis: ['I-' and stopping 'just-' and again, before settling on 'don't go and get lost, alright, I'd almost feel bad'] Jimmy: ['alright' and shoving her a controller for whatever console she has so they can play retro games and be competitive about it for a bit] Janis: [a mood] Jimmy: [as is throwing snacks into each other's mouths so simply must] Janis: [all the competitiveness] Jimmy: [speaking of I'm gonna do another hangman cos she guessed that one too fast for his liking, hold onto your hat bitch] Janis: [it was fun honey] Jimmy: [-- --- -- ---- ---- -- ---- - -------- --- -- ---] Janis: ['A'] Jimmy: [-- --- -- ---- ---- -- ---- a -------- -a- -- ---] Janis: ['Y'] Jimmy: [-- --- -y y--- ---- -- ---- a --a----y -ay -- ---] Janis: ['T'] Jimmy: [t- --- -y y--- ---- -- ---- a --a----y -ay t- ---] Janis: ['S'] Jimmy: [t- --- -y y--- s--- -s s--- a --a----y -ay t- ---] Janis: ['D'] Jimmy: [t- d-- -y y--- s-d- -s s--- a --a----y -ay t- d--] Janis: ['IE' 'cos we can sense a theme lol] Jimmy: [pout like how you gonna guess two letters bitch but we doing it] Jimmy: [t- die -y y--- -ide is s--- a -ea-e--- -ay t- die] Jimmy: [*side I can't type bye] Janis: [sings it at him] Jimmy: [when we know she's a good singer but he don't cos karaoke ain't happened yet so control your 😍 by drawing the hanged person but as 💔 Asia this time dropping a phone with a speech bubble of whatever bollocks they heard her boyfriend say] Janis: [draws him as a tadpole having a party in a pond with lady frogs and fishes] Jimmy: [lols] Janis: ['do you reckon I should feel bad about breaking them up?' shoving more snacks in her face, like] Jimmy: [when you give her such a wtf no look 'do they feel bad about wishing we would?' doesn't give her chance to answer cos obvs a rhetorical question 'there's your answer, like'] Janis: [shrugs like yeah, true 'but their love is so real' but rolls her eyes 'cos I doubt they were ever #goals] Jimmy: [shrugs back does a 💔 with his hands 'nowt I can't fix' and winks] Janis: [🙄] Jimmy: [goes to her window and opens it really wide to 🚬 leaning out dangerously far so he doesn't get any smoke in her room cos still doesn't wanna leave and see anyone] Janis: [comes to the window and looks out 'their car ain't back' like does that mean get out or] Jimmy: [gives her a look like oh no cali are coming for their 👑 by being so goals] Janis: [makes a face like don't] Jimmy: [goes to pass her the 🚬 like a peace offering but then is like oh you obvs don't want it my bad kinda takeback gesture cos what she said before about only faking it] Janis: [walks away 'cos stubborn] Jimmy: [just 🚬 and watching the 🐈s outside casually] Janis: [just back playing a solo game, pretending you ain't pouting] Jimmy: [sending her highlights of bathgate even though she's already seen them all cos shamelessly like pay attention to me] Janis: good thing we ain't in school Janis: last time they got this excited over a #scandal they put Jesy Halls in isolation for weeks Jimmy: You don't wanna be in isolation? Jimmy: fakest bollocks you've ever chatted Janis: You know they'd put you in and leave me out to get torn apart Janis: ⭐ Jimmy: what you get for being such an athlete Jimmy: and hey, might learn your name while I'm in there so it ain't all bad Janis: What you get for being so soft Janis: think of my mystique, would ya Jimmy: keep that to yourself, tah, it'll make us both look properly un-goals Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: Go on, might get to eat some snacks myself if you're struggling Janis: Fuck off Janis: I'm not encouraging you to talk about your dick so you can 🐽 Jimmy: you started it Janis: Nah Janis: why would I ever bring that up Jimmy: Why did you just? You tell me, girl Janis: 😒 Janis: you're so annoying Jimmy: You're easy to annoy Janis: I think you'll find most sane people don't wanna discuss your genitals Janis: just them downstairs Jimmy: 💔 Janis: you're buzzing Janis: be sneaking down in a few Jimmy: busted me Janis: mhmm Janis: wouldn't be a good real cheat, you Jimmy: my dad's got that covered Jimmy: I don't want 🥈 Janis: fair enough Janis: Freud's all over that statement Jimmy: he can be next for a 👻🥊 Janis: this is what comes of violent games Janis: [throws a bag of snack at him] Jimmy: [catches it like 😏] Janis: [pouts] Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: are you nearly done Janis: freezing here Janis: [in your short shorts] Jimmy: [wasn't done but gets done immediately cos #whipped] Janis: [gets under the covers] Jimmy: [comes over and tucks her in like a nerd] Janis: [allows this to happen like you're gonna go sleep 😊] Jimmy: [just sitting on the edge of the bed like when you tell a kid a story] Janis: ['you do this a lot, like'] Jimmy: [looks at her like what?] Janis: [looks down like tucking in] Jimmy: [shrugs like it's so casual cos she knows he's got a little brother from the pool awks] Janis: ['never stop, eh'] Jimmy: [looks at his phone cos still blowing up and back at her like so many jobs so little time] Janis: [tugs on his sleeve gently like lay down 'they'll be consoling her for hours still yet'] Jimmy: [does of course] Janis: ['you want me to go?' quiet and soft like he's asleep already 'I do have 2 cigarettes to smoke now so'] Jimmy: ['do you wanna go?' because can't answer a q but also obvs does not want that but thinks she does] Janis: [shrugs 'cos like no but do you want me to lol, so helpful] Jimmy: ['it's your bed' and what boy you're not helpful either] Janis: ['you want a tour of all the free ones?'] Jimmy: ['Which one's most worth haunting?'] Janis: [a look like that's easy but then a 🤔 face 'but you're pretty chicken so' and rolling over like night then] Jimmy: [shoves her like oi] Janis: [loling 'don't push me out of bed, how ungoals, you twat'] Jimmy: [literally rolls her back over to face him #excuse you 'answer me, dickhead'] Janis: [when that was hot so you're like literally give me a moment here so you wriggle down under the covers so he can't see you 'alright, I'll show you but I can't promise the ghost will come out' muffled by the duvet like hello] Jimmy: [lifts the covers up and peeping at her like ? and has cupped his ear like what? because one ear jokes 5ever] Janis: [coming out the bottom of the bed like can't catch me 'come on scaredy cat' and we all know what room we going to] Jimmy: [can't catch her ever but can chuck a hoodie at her because she's so cold and it might slow her down a bit] Janis: [puts it on and pretend swoons 'trying to cash in some hero points now, I see'] Jimmy: ['just don't want you to freeze to death before we get there, Jennifer, can't be arsed with throwing myself down the stairs right this second'] Janis: [pouts and grabs his face like n'awh 'but we could frame them, where's your sense of fun, honestly'] Jimmy: [pushes her off but then is like 😏 looking at her like good idea and picks her up as if he's gonna chuck her down the stairs] Janis: [playfighting like get off me boy 'as if I'd let you go 2nd'] Jimmy: [we love a playfight moment 'as if you reckon you call the shots'] Janis: [the most dramatic 'pfft!' and just rolling further towards the stairs like actually be careful please 'but you love coming first usually'] Jimmy: [does a mime locking his lips like don't tell anyone that, very ungoals, boy stop making it sexual again thank you 'depends, time and a place, you know, Jules'] Janis: [rolls her eyes but is 😳 'How can I trust you'll go through with it, besides, Romeo dies first, I fake it, you do it for real, then I do, stick to the script'] Jimmy: ['fake something for me that convincingly and I might do'] Janis: [just looking at him 'rude'] Jimmy: [a LOOK back at her] Janis: ['you can't tell me those pictures weren't convincing' 'cos we know it's still popping off] Jimmy: ['I sorted them' okay boy we gonna act like just cos you did all the camera shit she didn't do anything? Really now] Janis: ['it was my idea, and you wouldn't have any pictures on your own so'] Jimmy: [a shrug but we all know he's still looking at her, like oh jimothy what kind of challenge do you think you can lay down right here right now that'll top bathgate you simply can't] Janis: ['so, it's your turn to think of something, actually' but getting up and going to Edie's room, which is thankfully not a creepy shrine moment] Jimmy: [Follows her obvs] Janis: [it's probably less of a guest room more of a quiet chill room for if they wanted to go think about her, that seems like some hippie shit, so obviously no one goes in here though 'cos no thanks lol, gestures like 'this is the ghost room, can you feel it?' so sarky] Jimmy: [just making himself comfy in there because he don't know] Janis: [when this was a bad idea but you have to front it out and sit down like] Jimmy: [when you're so busy trying to think of something to top bathgate that you're oblivious] Janis: [at least you can lean in to pressuring him just making tick tock noises with your tongue like] Jimmy: [he'd do such a fake OMG STOP like when she was being tickled in front of the fans] Janis: [just gets closer to the ear she didn't bite so it's louder] Jimmy: [when you wanna lol but you don't wanna give her the satisfaction so you gotta bite your lip like it's okay I'm just thinking here, total accident that he looks really hot doing it soz Janis] Janis: [just shamelessly looking 'not meant to eat yourself, such a rookie' 😏] Jimmy: ['if anyone can recognise owt like that, it'd be you'] Janis: ['duh, I turned you, I'm like your mistress' raises brows 'or daddy, if you prefer'] Jimmy: ['Don't be telling my missus I've got one of them, tah, right rookie mistake that'd be, she already reckons me and her are well fake' does a what can you do, women eh, kinda gesture]] Janis: ['I don't reckon she knows you've got a name' shakes head like imagine that 'enjoy being on the other side of that one, babe'] Jimmy: [😏 'Sounds alright to me, that'] Janis: [🙄 but not that mad ever] Jimmy: [zips up the hoodie for her like how you possibly be annoyed at such a 😇] Janis: [pulls is back down justto be that bitch but then you look like you wanna be undressed in front of him so you pull it up and down a few times like a bit] Jimmy: ['you break it, you've bought it, rich girl' but clearly amused] Janis: [shrugs 'meant to let me keep it anyway'] Jimmy: ['You want me to freeze to death, that's the big plan, eh?' cos she'd have the school trip one already] Janis: [nods but is lol 'how else will everyone know you love me?'] Jimmy: [100% has to give her a new lovebite because I can't not if you're gonna say stuff like that Janis] Janis: [just like 'of course' but with feeling 'cos always covered low-key and we know it 'what about you, what do you want?'] Jimmy: [when you give her another one because that's what you want and we all know it but then you have to look at her like ? as if you weren't listening] Janis: [just gripping the sofa you're on so tightly so you can otherwise pretend this is so casual, tracing your finger 'round and 'round his ear lobe like 'yours healed ages ago...'] Jimmy: ['Have another go then' yeah this is so casual bye] Janis: [does, with vigour lol] Jimmy: [his turn to abuse the sofa] Janis: [admiring your handiwork 'bruises don't lie' and giving him back the hoodie like there you go] Jimmy: ['No need for you to lie either' cos she was cold and putting it back on her because I love a hair lift moment especially because he won't jump back 6 ft like when he did that exact thing on school trip #progress] Janis: [the state of the hair after all this we can only assume, going to put it up or something like ugh 'I don't lie, ever' fully aware of the irony ;cos of their fake dating deal like 😇] Jimmy: [irl 👌 so sarky] Janis: [lols] Jimmy: [when she's so cute and you can see so much of her neck now she's moved her hair and you're just like don't 😳] Janis: [motioning for him to pass her a cigarette and getting up 'ghost ain't coming, soz mate' 'cos definitely needs it now] Jimmy: [puts one behind her ear cos can't be tamed about touching her needlessly ever] Janis: ['you want my second one? as I don't smoke' as she's going to go downstairs] Jimmy: [takes one for himself as an unspoken yes] Janis: [kinda wanna make cali come back to be evil[ Jimmy: [do it gal] Janis: [they'll just say hi but she'll be fuming lol] Jimmy: [and he'll be wanting to run away] Janis: [at least its dark so you can sit here bright red, angrily smoking in silence] Jimmy: I'll fuck off home, say the word Janis: You can Janis: they won't wake you up for breakfast and awkward small talk though Jimmy: That where you get being a shit host from? Janis: Funny Jimmy: Could at least fake 😂 for me then, babe Janis: [😑 at him] Janis: convincing, yeah? Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: don't give me pity medals Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: have another go Janis: [a look that's half a LOOK and half don't] Janis: lost track of time, didn't reckon they'd be back 🤷 Janis: they couldn't see you so it don't count as meeting, right Jimmy: no 👻 about tonight Janis: yeah Janis: go if you have to Jimmy: I'll go if you want me to Janis: [say Cali's room also faces the front, nodding to the windows] Janis: go in once their light is on Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hope one of 'em has been sick or something Janis: doubt it'll be as pretty and pink coming back up Jimmy: [when we know that'll make him feel sick but not gonna see the greenish tint in the dark so stay 💪 boy and throw a stone at Grace's window to see if there's any life in there] Janis: 🙄 oh great Janis: give 'em ideas, lover boy Jimmy: I can't help missing her, alright? Jimmy: [dramatically fake pining] Janis: Disgusting Janis: [but a small half-smile Jimmy: [nudges her gently like hey that's at least a small 🏆] Janis: [nudes him like piss off but it's as gently] Jimmy: [just staying leaned into her a lil bit like be comforted] Janis: Proper soft, you Janis: could make yourself useful and find some fuel so I can set the place on fire whilst all my worst enemies are inside Jimmy: can't stop lying, you Jimmy: I'm well hard, me Jimmy: [plucks at the hoodie she's wearing like this is so cheap it'll burn right up] Janis: [looks down like hmm 🤔] Janis: you give to take away, only just got this hoodie back Jimmy: [nods at a passing cat like there you go instead then] Janis: [snorts] Jimmy: I were thinking Jimmy: it's not about arson but Janis: disappointing Janis: but go on Jimmy: could've waited til you'd heard it to 💔 me Janis: tell me Jimmy: I dunno, just Jimmy: might not be the massive-stly shit idea to try and be mates Jimmy: for as long as I'm here and this Janis: Wait, are you friendzoning me, Taylor? 😂 Janis: [actually 😂] Jimmy: [is pouting actually] Janis: [pats his shoulder like my bad] Janis: Sorry, that's just not what I expected you to say Jimmy: I've changed my mind now, dickhead Janis: Probably for the best Janis: if you can't handle that, like Janis: insert that quote here Jimmy: weren't likely to handle nowt for long but you're alright Janis: I don't need mates and you don't want me as one Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Let's go in then Jimmy: [does] Janis: [stops off in the kitchen to get more drink first] Jimmy: [does not follow her for the first time ever] Janis: don't you want a nightcap? Jimmy: Is it a) pretty or b) pink? Janis: That's long gone, boy Jimmy: So what's the point, like? Janis: You know I've seen you drink drinks that aren't flat white approved before, yeah? Jimmy: Don't sound like me or very #goals to me Janis: I'll leave the bottle here then 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Don't be in a mood Jimmy: Or what? You'll be in a bigger one? Janis: I'm not in a mood Jimmy: nowt to worry about then, is there? Janis: Why are you in one? Jimmy: What are you on about? Jimmy: Stick to the script, Jodie, we've got no rules but that Janis: Suit yourself Jimmy: tah for stating the obvious Jimmy: it were like Asia was here for a bit Janis: How lovely for you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Fuck sake Janis: you can't give me any time to react, no Jimmy: you can have loads, we're off the clock Janis: Bullshit Jimmy: nah Janis: Yeah Janis: I said I didn't know you were gonna say that Jimmy: like you said an' all, bad idea Jimmy: we can leave it out Janis: right, cheers Jimmy: you're right, take the 🏆 Janis: Leave it out, like you said Jimmy: lasses first Janis: Whatever Janis: this is ridiculous Jimmy: nowt about any of this has ever been owt else Janis: No need to tell me Jimmy: you're trying to tell me Janis: I'm trying to tell you fuck all Janis: what's the point Jimmy: 🙀 Janis: I'm not the one that's scared Janis: or taking back what I said Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: I'm taking it back 'cause you're a knobhead Janis: You knew that before you said it Jimmy: you weren't for a second so I said it Janis: What second? Jimmy: What does that matter? Janis: Maybe I would like to try again, or maybe I wanna know what to avoid Janis: take your pick Jimmy: Maybe you're right again and I'm soft Jimmy: take your 🏆 Janis: Bollocks, that's giving yourself one for nothing Janis: like you've been so nice to me even though I don't deserve it, fuck off Jimmy: you fuck off Jimmy: I'm tired Janis: go sleep then Jimmy: Alright Janis: Night Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [just downstairs, getting drunk] Jimmy: [I'm so evil because I'm like ooh the potential for her to come up here when she is] Janis: ['forget' he's in your room like bonjour] Jimmy: [exactly though] Janis: [why not baby] Jimmy: [him just half asleep like mother is that you returning from the great unknown, oh no wait I'm not at home remotely] Janis: [ah the confusion, poor boy] Jimmy: [when you're relieved that it's her for the hottest of secs because where you been girl but also not because awkward] Janis: [when he's on the side of the bed you sleep on so you're trying to get in like 'budge up'] Jimmy: [so offended before he realises how drunk she is but then also like shhh when he does realise as if anyone's gonna hear this jimothy calm down] Janis: [just pushing him but much less efficiently than normal 'least you've warmed it for me'] Jimmy: [just so 😒 like stop pushing me but not saying anything] Janis: ['are you still cross?'] Jimmy: ['I've got nowt to be mardy about' sighing at himself like ffs boy as he's scooting over #foreverwhipped] Janis: [chuckling to herself, quietly, thank god, as she settles in 'well I'm not happy with you'] Jimmy: ['And I've done nowt for you to be mardy at me about' okay Jimothy if you say so] Janis: ['Neither of those is true, you know' fluffing up the pillow] Jimmy: ['start a # if you feel so strongly' cos v mature] Janis: ['you're stupid, stupid as I am' poking him] Jimmy: [gives her a look like don't, which he means on many levels rn] Janis: [pulls a face 'cos so mature too right now 'we could be friends, I'm just saying'] Jimmy: ['You reckon?' because clearly they can't] Janis: ['duh'] Jimmy: [shakes his head] Janis: [nods, way too hard, 'now you made me dizzy as well'] Jimmy: [goes to sarcastically pat her on the head like there there but strokes her hair instead because so soft always] Janis: [pouts but genuinely] Jimmy: ['what?' but in the softest way] Janis: ['I want you to be my friend but I weren't lying when I said you wouldn't want me to be your friend but I still wish you would'] Jimmy: [needlessly moves her hair out of her face like look at me 'it ain't up to you what I want, I said I wanted to try 'cause I did- I do'] Janis: [Hides under the covers again like sorry can't look at you 'okay' really quietly] Jimmy: [reaches under the covers so he can trace a o and k with his fingertip on her hand/arm whichever is reachable] Janis: [comes back up 'go sleep now' and closes his eyes with her fingers] Jimmy: [such an amused little noise because he was asleep before she came in, excuse you] Janis: ['shh shh'] Jimmy: [puts a finger on her lips like you shh] Janis: [frowny face 'stop it'] Jimmy: [holds his hands up dramatically like alright, calm down and gets comfy like look I'mma sleep] Janis: [smug face like that's right and does the same 'least it's not a single this time'] Jimmy: ['gutted, me' said really sarcastically but we know you are boy] Janis: [gets all up in his grill like there you go then] Jimmy: ['funny'] Janis: ['that's what you get for being rude'] Jimmy: ['you woke me, pisshead' but affectionately not actually annoyed at all] Janis: [waves hand like psh 'you were rude before then'] Jimmy: ['Alright, shut up' like you really care about going back to sleep rn okay Jimothy] Janis: [gestures like see 'gotta be nice to me' but rolling over like okay, you can sleep] Jimmy: [OTT dramatic sigh so she's knows it's fake] Janis: ['bet you can't say one nice thing about me'] Jimmy: ['you're not as shit at kissing as you were on the trip' because I re-read that and he kept acting like she was so bad like OKAY liar] Janis: [pushes him 'what kind of compliment is that?!'] Jimmy: [shrugs like you don't know exactly what you're doing boy] Janis: ['alright then the only thing I have to say about you is you're slightly less shit at being nice but potentially worse at lying so' blows raspberry] Jimmy: ['bollocks, you've got loads to say tonight, lightweight' but he's loling] Janis: ['yes well I've been very bored'] Jimmy: [does like the awh cheek squish she does to him always 'poor baby'] Janis: ['you know I'll bite you' squirming out of reach 'why didn't you come down?'] Jimmy: [does the thing where you check an animals teeth like he wants to see her vampire fangs, stop touching her mouth please! 'Why didn't you come up?'] Janis: [wipes her mouth like a child like gross 'I was getting drunk' shrugs like hello] Jimmy: [shrugs back 'I were sleeping' but like not for ages boy we know it] Janis: ['marding' in a him impersonation Jimmy: [pushes her cos oi what a read] Janis: [mhmm noise 'me too, but I had company'] Jimmy: ['like I said, shit host'] Janis: ['what do you mean?' resting on her elbow 'you keep saying that'] Jimmy: [just giving her a look like pretty self explanatory] Janis: [a look like obvs not? 'I've fed you, entertained you, what more do you want, fanfare?'] Jimmy: ['that lot did the did the bulk of the entertaining, girl, weren't you' more lies and more slander] Janis: ['not my fault you've got shit taste then' is pouting] Jimmy: ['@whateverAsia'ssocials are, might start her off bawling again, what could be more goals?'] Jimmy: [but obvs he's said them I just cba to think of one lol] Janis: ['kink unlocked you horrible boy' but lols] Jimmy: [I've known for ages that were one of yours'] Janis: ['making girls cry?' fake ponders 'hmm, don't tell anyone'] Jimmy: ['not just lasses' does the broken heart hand thing again] Janis: ['you aren't that soft' nudges him 'unfortunately'] Jimmy: [nudges her back 'bit of editing and you can tweet that'] Janis: [passes her phone 'you'll have to do it for me, I'm not that drunk and sad'] Jimmy: [tweets something hilarious instead cos that bitch and makes a big show of not giving her the phone back cos drunk] Janis: ['what did you do, tweet my nudes?' tryna grab her phone like 'scuse me] Jimmy: ['Mr Lucas wishes' having a playfight over this phone so casually] Janis: ['who do you think I'm taking them for' then an ew face 'cos truly] Jimmy: ['Save something for the wedding night' cos in the school trip convo that was also a running theme of her marrying him lol] Janis: ['tweet that and we lose all credibility'] Jimmy: [shakes his head 'I could make owt sound goals, even that bollocks'] Janis: ['yeah but bit off message' gestures at the lovebites 'stick to the script, no improv'] Jimmy: [touches the newest ones he gave her, boy stop 'Alright'] Janis: [shakes her head 'don't' and pulls up the covers between them] Jimmy: [when you're actually 💔 now, so just getting back in a sleeping position] Janis: ['it's just 'cos I wanna and it's not fair and' let this be vaguely incoherent so you don't fully out yourself immediately] Jimmy: [just pretending he's actually gone deaf like we don't need to do this] Janis: [sad sound but turning over like you actually believe he's asleep] Jimmy: [just moving about like you're trying to get more comfy but getting closer to her so it's like the in bed version of when he was leaning on her earlier] Janis: [just really quiet and still for a long time, sighs 'night, Jimmy'] Jimmy: [we know he ain't gonna answer even though he all also know you aren't asleep sir] Janis: [AM skip or?] Jimmy: [I think we should say he leaves like super early cos got so real there] Janis: [okay gurl]

[wolfdws]

WOO this got loooong Don’t really know if this needs any special tags or not; Very vague abuse things, mostly re: Jesse feeling that he is not Allowed certain things, but other stuff too. Some sexual stuff but its like, rated T. 

It was day one of LA Pride in California and Jesse and Lou had checked into their hotel room about an hour ago. Jesse was nervous. The two of them had set their bags onto the king-sized bed, breathing twin sighs of relief to finally have a place to relax and get ready for the big day ahead of them. It took 3 days for Jesse to drive out here and meet Lou – well, closer to 2ish with Jesse’s penchant for pushing the speed limit and sleeping almost never.

Lou had gotten straight to work on his makeup, extracting what looked to Jesse like an entire mini suitcase stuffed full of products and then taking over the bathroom. Jesse could hear him now, singing along to the music pumping out from his phone in front of the bathroom mirror. A glance confirmed he was deep in his own concentration – from where Jesse was seated on a cushioned armchair, he could see Lou’s slender body leaning over the sink, long tan legs gleaming with some kind of sparkling lotion, face close to the mirror.

Lou was already half dressed to head out for day one – strappy black sandals, a flowy chiffon blouse that would help him fare well in the midday heat, and bright red shorts so tiny Jesse wondered if Lou hadn’t found them in the junior’s section. Oftentimes an outfit like that signaled Lou might want to go by Lucy or use she/her on that particular day but so far Lou hadn’t said anything – Jesse got the feeling Lou wasn’t quite sure yet. So he’d just keep calling him Lou like usual.

Jesse turned his gaze away from the eye-catching red to glance at Lou’s face. He’d already smoked up his eyelids with shades of black and brown and was painting on a bright teal line to hide the seam of his lashes.

Jesse looked down to his own feet. Broken in black high tops, laces tucked in; blue jeans with the knees nearly bare; a plain grey tee shirt. He looked like he belonged somewhere else – he wasn’t sure where, but not at a Pride festival.

“You’re looking butch as always.”

Jesse jolted a little, looking up from his lap into Lou’s contoured face.  He hadn’t noticed him leave the bathroom and come over.

“Is that what you’re wearing?” Lou pressed. Jesse frowned self-consciously.

“It’s comfortable,” he offered meekly, slouched in the chair and frowning defensively. Lou’s eyes searched his face, quirking one chiseled brow upward. He seemed to consider how best to approach this, then sighed and rested one hand on a slender hip.

“What happened to your studs?” He asked, gesturing with his free hand to Jesse’s ears. The slouching man got even lower in his seat.

A minute passed this way – Lou poking and prodding over Jesse’s outfit, Jesse getting increasingly flustered with each comment, until at last the larger man snapped in nervous frustration: “It doesn’t matter, Lou! We’re just- gonna walk around, so what’s it matter?”

“Just walk around? It’s Pride!”

“I know!”

This last word Jesse nearly bellowed, leaned forward heatedly in his seat, then silence lapsed between the two of them.

Lou pursed his lips – painted red, like his shorts – and then perched himself on the arm of the chair, swung his legs across Jesse’s front to rest his shaven calves on the opposite arm.

“Your first Pride’s important,” Lou murmured, voice gone soft. A hand came up to toy gently with Jesse’s hair. “It’s supposed to be fun. What’s the matter here, Jess?”

Jesse’s frown persisted, but the heat had drained from him, leaving behind only vulnerability. Lou’s yellow eyes held him for a moment before he broke the stare to look down at his lap again. How was he supposed to explain the feeling he got just thinking of wearing anything other than this – perfectly invisible, unspecial, unnoticeable, comfortable clothes? The paranoia that everyone had to be staring, judging, the too much feeling.

“I…don’t wanna…look stupid or anything.”

A soft noise from Lou, somewhere between a hum and a sigh. A little grin stretched his bright lips as he tugged Jesse’s chin up with one skinny finger - an almost mothering expression, not quite calling the worry silly but the comforting smile of someone who knew better, knew what a useless worry it was.

“Baby boy,” Lou huffed with a smile, looking into Jesse’s face, “You are not going to look stupid. There are hundreds of thousands of people here all weekend, and if it helps you to relax, I can promise that they’re all going to be way too busy getting drunk, high, and laid to spend much time judging you.”

A brief pause, then Lou added with a smirk, “Plus, I’ll be beside you. They’ll for sure be looking at me.”

At this, Jesse snorted out a quick laugh and the anxious lines around his eyes softened a bit.

“Now,” Lou continued, gentle but firm, “I know you’re gonna be out of your comfort zone - but you’re gonna regret it if you don’t take advantage of your first Pride to experiment a little. So we’re gonna get you fixed up.”

Jesse’s worry returned immediately. “How fixed up?”

“Oh, relax,” Lou pretended to swat at Jesse (ignoring the micro-flinch it pulled from him) then stood to grab Jesse’s bag from the bed and dug out his diamond studs. “Your dad is three thousand miles away; it’s just me and a couple hundred thousand other gays.” He leaned down slightly to carefully put the studs in – one in each earlobe.

“Ahh,” Lou grinned wide, “Already much better. They make your eyes look so much brighter.” Lou trailed one finger over the clear sparkle of one diamond, looking into Jesse’s whole face for a moment before collecting himself and straightening.

“I’m guessing those are the only shoes you brought?” Lou asked while he dug around through Jesse’s bag some more. He heard Jesse’s affirmative grunt over his shoulder. Predictable. “Then we’ll have to do something about your pants…Is this really all you have? I need to take you shopping.”

“You can if you want.”

Lou paused, twisting to peer at the man still slouching in the armchair. “Really?”

Jesse gave one of his vague shrugs. “If you want.”

Lou was grinning, a genuine excitement to treat his friend – who so rarely let himself be treated kindly at all - running through him. A barely-contained squeak had Jesse rolling his eyes but looking amused.  

“You’ll still have to look like a bum for today but-“

“Hey!”

“-we can get you so much awesome stuff for later!”

--

In the end, Lou pushed Jesse into wearing darker, more fitted jeans (all the while asking how on earth Jesse would tolerate the heat, but the taller man didn’t seem worried) and the only not-greyish thing in his wardrobe: a fitted t-shirt of a very pale pink with a shallow v-neck. In Lou’s eyes, it at least wasn’t another grey sweatshirt. Jesse, for his part, felt very exposed but was doing his best to channel the nervous energy into excitement.

If Lou had been someone else, he might have hesitated or felt bad for making Jesse so clearly uncomfortable. But he knew that his friend needed to be pushed out of his comfort zone, that really he would be grateful for this in the long run, even if he was anxious for the moment. And Lou wasn’t faint-hearted; he could give out a little tough love and not feel bad about it in the slightest. His demeanor was not one for apologizing all day.

At last, Lou and Jesse left the hotel room and took to the streets for the first afternoon of Pride. The big parade itself wasn’t until tomorrow, so they had their Friday afternoon wide open to walk the beach in Santa Monica, visit shops, eat good food, and mingle around more LGBT people in one space than Jesse had ever seen in his life.

Jesse insisted on spending a good two hours at the beach – Lou tolerated this first because it gave him an excuse to show off the red hat that matched his shorts, and secondly because, although he hated to admit it, it was almost impossible to deny Jesse anything when he had that genuine pleading look on his face. Damn him.

Lou got his payback soon, though – spending almost the entire rest of their sunny afternoon dragging Jesse store to store for new clothes. Jesse was obviously struggling a little with it – but Lou pressed on, maintaining his usual flagrant positivity that left no room for self-doubt, but occasionally slowing down when he could sense Jesse really needed it.

Jesse had a sort of affinity for small and clean and soft, Lou soon realized. Flashy scared him away – he wouldn’t even touch anything with sparkle or glitter. But an otherwise simple crew neck sweater with a tiny stack of straight lines stitched into the chest, red, orange, yellow and on down to purple, made him pause. Lou smiled softly, watching him thumb at the pattern.

They argued over some pieces – Jesse had to get at least one thing that showed skin, Lou insisted. It was a crying shame that Jesse never showed off his midriff. Lou knew because he’d seen it plenty of times and never got tired of it.

By the end of the day, Jesse’s heels ached, and he wanted to sit down and recharge from all the energy that took from him – mentally, emotionally, physically.

The pair returned to their hotel room and dropped a half dozen bags onto the floor. Jesse groaned as he collapsed onto the carpet and set to neatly folding all his new things and reorganizing his bag. Lou helped out – sort of. He dug around Jesse’s duffel and tossed some of the oldest things with the most holes in them, chiding Jesse all the while for not putting enough effort into his appearance.

“You have to admit it’s at least useful to look good.” Lou appealed to his friend’s overly practical sense of logic. “People are willing to do more for you that way.”

Jesse hummed, partially won over, while he struggled to fold the crop top Lou had forced him to buy. “Sometimes.”

“Always.” Lou snatched the fabric from Jesse’s hands and did the folding himself. “You never know when you’ll need a favor from someone.”

Jesse only raised a brow at that, and leaned back against the edge of the bed, fed up with folding.

Lou tucked the crop top into one of the bags, now neatly folded, and turned yellow eyes on Jesse.

“Did you have a good day?”

Jesse’s blink was fatigued, but his grey eyes were honest. “Tiring, but yeah, good.”

“Good. I told you so.”

Then Lou grinned and slid smoothly into Jesse’s lap, knees planting on either side of his hips.

Another arched brow; the twitch of a tired smirk.

“I saw what else you packed in your bag.” Lou wagged his brows salaciously.

The brow lifted another notch, but Jesse remained otherwise unstirred.

“What, not a single one of those condoms is meant for me?” Lou pouted.

“They’re meant for whoever needs them.” Jesse rumbled, letting his tired head fall back against the soft duvet. Lou took the opportunity to peck kisses over his throat.

“I’ll do all the work.” He promised with a chuckle, and it got Jesse to snort.

“Hmmm,” the noise was low in Jesse’s throat, rough fingers petting a little at Lou’s sides, toying.

Lou gave an exasperated eyeroll, wriggling at the tingly feeling that went up his ribs. It was easy for Jesse to get under Lou’s skin, but Lou couldn’t ever manage the same effect with any kind of consistency. “You know, it kinda hits a girl’s self esteem when you have to think about it so-”

A yelp broke the quiet of their conversation when Jesse slipped an arm around Lou’s waist to stand and tossed him onto the bed, laughing.

--

They stayed together Friday to Sunday, and Lou got the rare treat of seeing his friend comfortable in his own skin, unafraid. He was also treated to the usual torture of fighting the bittersweet affection that welled up every time Jesse laughed or smiled – really laughed or smiled, the kind that lit his whole face up and made Lou wish things had gone differently between them. But it was so good to see him happy. Even if the broad-shouldered, rugged guy that hit on Jesse at the bar Saturday night and accompanied them back to their room got Jesse to sweat in ways that Lou never could.

Monday was their last day – the Pride was technically over as of 2 AM the night prior, but they stuck around for the morning after. Jesse had to start driving back by lunchtime.

Their last stop after breakfast was a men’s lingerie boutique that Lou had spied on day one and waited for until now, mostly because he knew otherwise he would have blown his whole budget on their first morning.

Jesse stood around and looked vaguely uncomfortable while Lou took his time fingering through piles of bralettes and garters. He wondered if any of them would get Jesse to look at him the way he wished he would. Probably not – Lou knew Jesse was only ever moderately into him. They had given it a chance, and Lou was forever grateful that Jesse had really tried for him, but they just didn’t click that way.

Glancing over, Lou paused and smiled to himself, spying Jesse a few displays over staring at something with a thoughtful frown.

Jesse jumped – like usual – when Lou poked suddenly at his ribs and peered around his arm.

“Whatcha lookin’ at, big guy?”

“Nothin’.” Jesse rumbled, retracting the hand that had tentatively reached out to trace the lace waistband on an otherwise normal pair of boxer-briefs. Heat started burning over his shoulders and onto his cheeks, flushing him an embarrassed red. He tried to turn away.

“Woah, easy,” Lou took him by the arm and steadied him. “I was just asking – they’re nice!” Lou reached out to feel the pair for himself.

Jesse stilled, slightly mollified, but didn’t reach out to touch anything else.

Lou pursed his lips while Jesse frowned, self-conscious.

“You should get some of this stuff.” Lou’s suggestion was soft but bright, encouraging.

Jesse rumbled low in his throat, a negative sound. “I would look like an idiot.”

“I wouldn’t think so.” Lou shook his head. “And I bet that asshole you like to sleep with wouldn’t mind either.”

Jesse shot a disapproving look down at Lou. “Mitch already knows I’m an idiot.” He found himself curious if Lou might be right, though.

“Then there’s nothing to lose!”

They stood at an impasse for a minute or two, Jesse looking over the display – it was really some of the most conservative stuff the store had; tame compared to everything else around it. Lou was a light, encouraging weight at his side. The store was mostly empty aside from them; quiet.

When Jesse heard Lou speak again, the softness there took him by surprise.

“You’re allowed to have these things, Jesse. Soft things. You’re allowed to have things you like just because you like them. Doesn’t have to be multi-use and practical and only the bare necessities, you know. They make you feel good? You like them? Get them. You’re allowed to have and feel good things. Good, soft things.”

Jesse’s throat tightened.

Carefully, he picked up what he’d had his eye on. Behind his arm, Lou hardly dared to smile lest he spoil the moment of bravery.

Jesse cautiously went to buy what he’d selected, and Lou bit his lip, eagerly picking up a few more things he’d seen Jesse’s eyes linger on – much needed gifts for his friend.

--

Jesse returned home from his first Pride and felt overwhelmed by how much stuff he had to hide now. Luckily, most of what he’d bought with Lou wasn’t actually that bad – things he could wear that nobody would think anything of except that he’d dressed better than usual.

But there was the sweater with the tiny, minimalist rainbow, a small pride flag pin, and of course the underwear.

He didn’t dare keep them in his usual drawers at home – sometimes Mathias rooted through his things just because he could. So he ended up simply keeping them stashed in the duffel bag he’d taken with him to LA, and left that at the off-white safehouse that almost nobody used.

He was too afraid to wear any of it at home, so he only got to wear it when he stayed nights at the safehouse. That usually meant Mitch was there – Lou was right, Jesse found; Mitch liked the lace. He didn’t wear them around Mitch often, though. The taller man was rough, which suited Jesse’s tastes, but usually meant clothes could get stretched or torn.

Instead, he took them out only rarely, when he was at the safehouse all alone. It made him miss Lou and California and how easy it was to breathe out there. He liked to lay alone in bed with his music playing, bathing in moonlight from the window, and idly let his fingers enjoy the feel of lace on his hips - or silk, or even the almost fuzzy soft lounge boxers Lou had snagged. Sometimes he didn’t want anything to do with them – days where anything soft made him feel unlike himself, and all he wanted was baggy and comfortable and grey. Lou could try all he liked, but that was just part of who Jesse was. Still, some nights he could enjoy deviating from his norm.

You are allowed to feel good, soft things. It was rare that Jesse remembered to try. After things with the family started escalating again, he forgot about the duffel bag – and its contents – almost completely, until it sat untouched in the safehouse closet, waiting for when he would need it again.

[shesdreamingofamonster]

His Queen (VII)

Word Count: 1,830

Genre:  Action, Romance, Mafia AU

Ship:  Reader x Yixing/Lay

Summary:  After Yixing overhears of your involvement, the exact plan against the enemy needs to be arranged. With the danger returning soon, there aren’t many options left.

I II III IV V VI VIII Epilogue

“What are you doing up?!” You sprinted over to him, taking hold of his waist, trying to stabilize him and take all of his weight onto yourself. He turned his head to look at you, a somewhat annoyed expression on his face. “I woke up and no one was there, all I heard was voices, so I thought I would come see what was going on.” You didn’t say anything, just fussed about with his waist, making sure he didn’t open the stitches keeping his wound closed. “I am fine Y/N, I just want to know what it is that you are up to, especially with all of the guys?” He gave you a leveled stare.

You looked up and gave him a loving expression, his face softened as it always did with you. “Nothing you need to concern yourself with, you just need to get better, let’s get you back to bed.” You started leading him back up the stairs but he wouldn’t budge. “I am not going back to bed. I have been laying down long enough.” You rolled your eyes and tried again, pulling softly on his arm. “Y/N, can you please stop treating me like a child! If anything, I should be the one taking care of you, taking care of everyone. Every second that I spend in that bed, the more likely it is for something else to happen.”

You looked around the room, seeing the looks of astonishment. He has never gotten angry like that at you. Of course, it was only because he felt like he wasn’t doing what he was supposed to. It wasn’t in resentment. You loosened your grip on him and backed away, lowering your head. “I am sorry. I only want to make you better.” He grimaced at the way you reacted. Moving forward to wrap you in his arms. “I shouldn’t have raised my voice.” You let him hold you, knowing that is the only thing that would make him believe you weren’t upset with him.

Then he looked up at the boys. “Will someone please tell me what is going on?” You raised your head, still in Yixing’s hold, and nodded. Junmyeon’s eyes looked for your approval. He knew that you would be the one getting the most grievances from their leader. “We may have devised a plan.” You looked back up at your boyfriend. He didn’t seem too alarmed yet. “And what exactly is this plan?” The maknae line seemed to be upset, the younger boys’ nervous glances in your direction were not helping with the angry boyfriend you would soon need to deal with. “Now, keep in mind that Y/N has just as much say in this house as all of us.” Yixing looked down at you and back at Junmyeon. “Continue.” Jun’s demeanor unfazed, “We need to either go to their base, or bring them to ours. They already know where we are, and we would need to find their exact location. Since we know this area the best, bringing them here makes the most sense. And what they want the most, as you know, is revenge. Their best shot at revenge is hurting Y/N. Well, she suggested we make an offer to them. Tell them that she is theirs, that you are still out of commission and we do not want any more trouble. That they can have their revenge, if they come here and get her themselves.”

The sudden tension in Yixing’s body was very evident. When your name was mentioned, he tightened his hold on you, protectively. Even the thought of you being a pawn left a sour taste in his mouth. “Absolutely not! That is completely out of the question. We are not offering her up on a silver platter for them to enjoy.” He brought your head to his chest and made sure there was absolutely no space between you. As if his body would keep you away from harm. You pushed away though, trying to make it easier for him to hear your defense. “Why not?! They are going to come for me anyways. And who says going to them won’t lead to a trap. This is our best shot. You are hardly in a position to go against them on unknown territory. Please Xing, just think about it.”

He opened his mouth to respond but stopped himself. He looked at all of the men he called brothers. They believed that this was the best option as well. Their faces all showed it. He trusted their opinions. Letting his emotions get in the way, that is something that a leader shouldn’t do. He knew you could handle them going away to danger. But you putting yourself in danger, voluntarily, he had no idea what your limits were. He taught you how to defend yourself from attackers, not how to put yourself in front of a bullet. His hands came up to cup your face, “Are you absolutely sure that this is what you want to do? You don’t have to be involved at all.” You put on a face which you believed showed your strength and determination, “I am positive.”

***

After fighting with Yixing for a good twenty minutes about getting him to lay down and him adamantly denying your pleas, you gave up. He was now sitting on the couch with you at his side, fingers intertwined as you listened to the ideas that everyone wanted to pitch about how things should go. Jongin suggested just having you stand outside of the house when they come, which was turned down as soon as it was said. “You just want her served to them on a platter?” Baekhyun couldn’t help but say what was on his mind at the moment. They broke into an argument as you looked over are your boyfriend who just looked tired and worried. Laying your head on his shoulder, you gave his hand a squeeze.

Junmyeon looked as if he was completely over the situation. “It is times like this where we need to be together, we need to be one. If we are going to get anywhere at all with this plan, and keeping everyone safe, we need to come together.” He made sure that he looked everyone in the eye when he spoke. He knew that the boys were just stressed, and that is where the aggression was coming from. You wondered if leaving the room would make things better. But as you moved to get up Yixing gave you a questioning look. “I might be making this worse,” you said the first part to him. The others immediately gave their responses to reassure you that they wanted you there to make the decisions with them.

“Would they be able to tell if I had a weapon on me?” After contemplating a few ideas, you wanted to see if the boys would like them. “Most likely,” Minseok stated with a concentrated look. “Do we happen to have any switch blades on hand, something she could hide up her sleeve?” Chanyeol and Baekhyun looked at each other, being the most familiar with the knives and other blades they had in their possession. Suddenly Baekhyun’s face lit up, “I told you it would come in handy!” Chanyeol looked entertained as Baekhyun got up to retrieve the allusive item. “We found one on someone, he decided that we should keep it. I am honestly surprised that a situation arose where it could be used.” Yixing let out a small laugh beside you, “Of course you two would stumble upon a switch blade.” Chanyeol grinned just as Baekhyun made his way back to the group. “That was fast!” You knew that the weapons room was located in the west wing, there is no way he went there. “I may have kept this with my personal possessions. I like to mess around with it from time to time, practice certain maneuvers.” He opened it to show you, the silver gleamed like he recently cleaned it. It was smaller than you thought it would be. In fact, it was about the size of a pen, even looked like one. You assumed it was custom made, for whoever the boys dealt with to retrieve it. But even a small blade could be lethal, if it is used correctly. “We could strap it to your arm, just above the wrist. You would need to be close, but not suspicious.” You nodded, affirming all of the information he was relaying to you. He showed you how to eject the blade, all you had to do was push down the button like on a pen. “I could get close, maybe flirt a little. Pretend that I was just his booty call, that the feelings weren’t reciprocated. I am sure they would take the bait of a beautiful woman.” Yixing seemed a bit bothered by your words, even though you were obviously more than a toy to each other. “All they know is that Yixing is infatuated with me, no offense babe. I could be a seductress.”

Sehun and Jongin burst out laughing. A little offended you shot them a glare. “If I didn’t know you, I would buy it.” Kyungsoo sat up. “An important man who fell for a beautiful woman, that happens all the time. Not to be cliché. Y/N’s plan could work.” You looked around to see if anyone else agreed. No one seemed to be outright upset by it, well other than Yixing you didn’t want you involved in the first place. “What if they don’t believe it?” Jongdae thought out loud. “Well that is all we have to rely on. They don’t know me, they have only heard about me. I can be anyone I want to them. I just need a chance. I know I can do it.”

“Anyone have issues with this? Of course we will need to prepare, give Y/N some blade combat training. When the time comes, we need to follow her lead. We know what is coming this time. This is our home, we know the landscape and the building, we have the weapons. Are we in agreement?” Junmyeon looked to Yixing for approval first, and then called for those in agreement to say ‘aye.’ Ten voices rang out in unison, including your own.

“I will send word to them somehow. Tell them about our arrangement, that Yixing is out of commission and that we do not want any more trouble. They are coming with the intent of taking Y/N from him, and we are not sure exactly in what way. I suggest we get some rest, preparations will begin shortly.”

This was happening. They were coming, and you were the main piece of the plan. They may not have been notified yet, but that didn’t make a difference. You are the prey. But instead of running away you are going to face it head on.

It is time to turn into the predator.

Next Part

Masterlist

[schraubd]

Evil Things Come in Normal Packages

One of the first bits of independent research I ever did, as an undergraduate at Carleton, examined how southern judges responded to Black litigants making claims in the Jim Crow era. Everyone is familiar with the Scottsboro cases, for example, and many lawyers know of the two Supreme Court cases that resulted: Powell v. Alabama (reversal of convictions due to failure to provide counsel) and Norris v. Alabama (reversal of convictions due to exclusion of Blacks from the jury pool). But before the Supreme Court heard those cases, they went up through the Alabama judiciary, which issued its own rulings. It will not surprise anyone that the Alabama Supreme Court had affirmed all the convictions. It might surprise some that in Powell, at least, that affirmance came over a vigorous dissent by the Chief Justice of that court. More to the point: if one reads the opinions in those cases, one is struck by their ... normalcy. The general sense of how the southern legal system treated Black litigants in the Jim Crow era might be summarized as "the litigant is Black, the litigant loses. The end." That's both right and wrong. On the one hand, the law really was -- consistently and systematically -- stacked against Black litigants, in ways that made it virtually impossible to achieve justice. On the other hand, the legal opinions always had the appearance and trappings of normal, unremarkable legal analysis. They looked the same, more or less, to how legal opinions look today. Sometimes, opinions aren't unanimous. Sometimes -- rarely, but sometimes -- Black litigants even won in the southern judiciary. Why does this matter? Well, it seems to me that we do -- at some level -- expect that systematic injustice of the Jim Crow variety is (for lack of a better word) aesthetically distinctive; coming in clear packages of snarling viciousness that makes no bones about its own evil. And a corollary of that is that, to the extent we don't witness that sort of snarl as widespread in the present day, we must not be witnessing systematic injustice (of the Jim Crow variety). But what my research indicated, and what I continue to believe, is that this presupposition is incorrect. Even then, evil was wrapped in normalcy and held the trappings of justice and civilization. Which means that any normalcy and civility we witness today is not probative evidence that we are not ourselves witnessing evil. All of this is, of course, warm-up to the discussion of that New York Times article on the "normal" neo-Nazi next door. I haven't read that profile, and it strikes me as quite plausible that it was done poorly. But I admit to significant discomfort over the notion that it's wrong to "normalize" Nazism (or antisemitism, or racism, or what have you) in the sense that it's wrong to present it as something that is perpetuated by people who in many respects appear "normal": not snarling monsters, not people twirling their mustaches and cackling about their desire to immiserate the universe. Now, not all the critics are making such a claim: Jemele Hill, for instance, recognizes that the genre isn't per se wrong but thinks the execution is off -- a totally fair claim.

The journalist in me understands that your job sometimes is to explain why awful people are so awful. It’s a delicate process. It’s a fine line between explaining and giving hateful people a platform that normalizes their hate. Swing and a miss, here https://t.co/KkEE2rmhTv

— Jemele Hill (@jemelehill) November 25, 2017

The JTA analysis likewise contends that the problem with the piece is that the author seems to just assume "oh, we all know these views are garbage" -- but of course, the actual moral of the story here is that lots of people, people who don't "wear it on their sleeve", people who maybe (gasp) read The New York Times, actually don't "know" that and will accordingly read the piece in a very different light than what the author intended. But contrast that critique to Ezra Klein's, who confidently tells us that there's nothing "new" about the observation that evil is banal. In a sense he's right, but the reason that Arendt's work still resonates is precisely because we're resistant to the message. This is why people wince when they hear the label "The New Jim Crow" -- we may have problems, sure, but Jim Crow? That was so ... explicit! The obviousness, the alleged abnormality of it, is taken to be the knockout argument against applying it to the present day. It seems trivial to say that Nazis, too, shop for groceries and like to pet puppies. But to the extent that many people really do seem to take the stance that "Nazism can't be a problem here -- all the folks in my neighborhood are normal folks who shop for groceries and pet puppies", then it actually does matter to reiterate that terrible people share those qualities too. In short: Our markers for extreme injustice are far, far off-base. We think we'll see head-to-toe swastika tattoos and street executions on every corner. And since we don't see that, we assume there's nothing left to see. But injustice doesn't always, or even often, come clothed in such distinctive garb. Most of the time, evil things come in normal packages -- and it's important to point that out. via The Debate Link http://ift.tt/2k6V7Jn

[shrack]

aftermath and growth

i dabbled in kingsman fic! i absolutely want to explore this fandom more and im excited to do so.

Merlin's always been good at noticing things about other people, but he's absolute shit at noticing things about himself. Eggsy inserted himself into his life after V-Day, and he's grateful. ao3 mirror

Merlin is good at noticing things. As easy as that sounds, over the years, he’s gotten good at reading people. He knows when someone’s upset by the slightest twitch of a frown, he can tell if someone’s lying within the first few words of a sentence. He sees how Eggsy acts after V-Day, and he recognizes some similarities.

Not being able to cope with the death of someone so close to you before having to go out and save the world takes it’s toll. After Lancelot’s death, they had time to process. Took the time to honor his life in their own different ways. But before they could even think about Harry’s death, while the gunshot still echoed in their ears, they were shoved back into the world.

And now, it’s quiet. Cleanup after V-Day has been tough, but that’s mostly on Merlin’s and other agencies’ shoulders. It’s amazing how many people were believers in Valentine’s ideology, but the more time Merlin spends on the cases, the more it doesn’t surprise him. Rich, white men in positions of power? Of course they’d want to rid the world of anyone who isn’t them. The Kingsman agents are resting, training for the future when something like this inevitably happens again, and Merlin keeps an eye on Eggsy.

Half because Merlin is worried, and half because Eggsy doesn’t trust anyone else to check up on him. Rightfully so.

He sees the way Eggsy clenches his jaw when someone mentions a new Galahad, and he remembers the poorly concealed pain whenever someone mentioned replacing his first dead colleague at Kingsman. He listens to Eggsy complain about his therapy sessions and remembers how pissed he was that he had to go, but how thankful he was that he could get everything he kept bottled up off his chest.

As much as Merlin hated distractions, he finds it nice that Eggsy has placed himself into his life. When Eggsy knocks--three fast, gentle knocks, with his second knuckles, usually standing sideways to watch the hallway past Merlin’s room--it’s second nature to let him in, and rarely does he protest when the younger settles himself on the couch and talks about his day. If he needs quiet, Eggsy listens. More often than not, Eggsy is the one to remind him that yes, he does need to eat meals like a normal person, or that no, he can’t pull another all-nighter planning an extraction that’s not happening for another few days. And he gets used to it.

Eggsy’s been stuck in the Kingsman HQ for a while now, but differently than everyone else. Singlehandedly saving the world takes its toll, mentally and physically. Between wrecked ribs and some nasty internal bleeding from blunt force, he’s been in and out of the medical wing time and time again. He’s going a little crazy, but Merlin doesn’t mind hearing him complain as long it’s not targeted at him.

It’s around the time that Eggsy typically storms in--a few minutes after his therapy appointment, before he goes to train to get back into fighting shape--when he hears someone knock. Differently, more polite, definitely facing the door using their whole hand, not strong enough to be an agent. His hand hesitates over the button that he didn’t even notice he was reaching toward, and he has to remind himself of the proper etiquette. (If you told Merlin a year ago that he would be throwing etiquette, something he’s followed for so many years, to the wayside, he would have laughed right in your face.)

The conversation that follows is boring and completely unnecessary. Someone he hasn’t bothered to learn the name of going over the details of Lancelot’s next mission, a short recon mission in Turkey following the latest trace of any Valentine’s associates that weren’t blessed (or cursed) with being immune. He understands the importance of knowing the ins and outs of everything that goes on from here on out, to prevent another... situation from occurring, but, feeding him information he himself has ironed out thoroughly over the past week and a half seems a little much.

He catches himself again later on, when he opens his mouth and turns to ask Eggsy’s opinion on something and he remembers that he’s not there. There’s a sinking feeling in his stomach-- disappointment? The hell is he disappointed about?--and he takes his glasses off to scrub his hands over his face. Maybe it’s the exhaustion hitting him, but he knows that’s not it.

He may be good at noticing things in regards to others, but my God, he’s shit at noticing things about himself.

He cares so much because he’s grown fond of the younger boy. Even during training, when he swore up and down he wasn’t allowed to have favorites, because every time in the past he hasn’t cared for any of them past hoping they stay alive. But Eggsy’s so...different, feisty in the same ways that Merlin remembers Harry was, even when Eggsy had failed the dog test, it was the first time he was upset that someone didn’t make it. (Not to discredit Roxy in any way, of course.)

Eggsy knocks later on, and as Merlin opens the door he’s already talking, about his day and training with Roxy that “kicked his fuckin’ ass, but it was worth it”, and Merlin has planned this. In the time between his...realization of sorts, and now, he knows exactly what’s going to happen. Tactful, smooth, definitely planned--

“I’d like to take you out sometime.”

He turns in his chair to face Eggsy, who’s standing stock-still in front of the couch, mouth agape, and Merlin internally groans. He’s not used to trying to handle his own emotions, he typically just relies on his ability to mask everything and anything that might distract him from his work.

“Come again?”

“I admit, I’ve been rather fond of you for a while,” Merlin says slowly, treading lightly over the words he definitely hasn’t rehearsed, “and I appreciate your company very much. If not, it’s perfectly alright, don’t feel obligated or anything.”

“Sounds fun.”

It’s Merlin’s turn to gape a little, as Eggsy plops himself on the couch and flashes him a smile.

“Oh come on, I would’ve asked myself if you weren’t so bloody unreadable.”

“Aye, I have that same problem with myself.” Eggsy laughs and Merlin’s heart swoops pleasantly.

“Am I gonna get in trouble for sleeping with my boss?” Eggsy asks, and Merlin turns back to his monitor with a shrug of his shoulders.

“Who said I was your boss?”

If he had been looking, he would’ve seen the idea come to Eggsy, and he doesn’t react when Eggsy pushes himself up and crosses the room to stand next to Merlin’s chair.

“So I’m not going to get in trouble for a change?” Eggsy asks, rocking back on his heels, and Merlin glances at him out of the corner of his eye.

“What are you on about, lad?”

“Just wonderin’,” Eggsy hums, watching Merlin, “I won’t get in trouble if I ask to kiss ya?”

Merlin snorts and spins his chair to face him, looking up at him with an amused smile. “You’re almost as smooth as I am.”

“Is that a yes?”

Merlin hums an affirmative and Eggsy’s quick to lean down, gentle fingers resting under Merlin’s chin to tilt him up, kissing him slowly, and quite frankly, and little dirty. And Merlin expected nothing different.

When Eggsy pulls back he still lingers a little too close, hot breath puffing against Merlin’s lips, that sly smile on his face.

“When have you eaten last?”

“Do you want the real answer or the fake one?” Merlin mutters, voice low and a smile creeping onto his lips.

“ Hamish,” Eggsy scolds, voice condescending as ever as he stands up straight, and catching Merlin completely off-guard.

“ How --”

“What, I’m not allowed to know things too? Up, we’re going to eat.”

“This doesn’t count as the date though,” Merlin says as he shuts down his station, the long and meticulous way that makes Eggsy tap his foot impatiently. He doesn’t have to look to know.

“Nah, you can take me somewhere nice with all that Kingsman money.”

“That you, lad, also have.”

“Yeah, but,” Eggsy bats his eyelashes as Merlin stands up and faces him, “you wouldn’t make me pay, would you?”

“Make you pay some other way, then,” Merlin deadpans, and he can’t help but laugh when Eggsy very obviously wets his lips and ducks his head before following Merlin out of the office.

[linkspooky]

Panem Et Circenses

Roma’s monologue from the latest chapter was what interested me the most more than any bloodshed depicted. (Yes, even more than Urie getting owned.) In particular her light reference to a latin phrase. 

Bread and Circuses or “Panem Et Circenses”, it’s a phrase used to describe appeasement of the masses, most particularly in the form of government. That public approval is best gained not through exemplary of excellent public service and police, but through distraction and satisfaction of the most immediate and shallow desires of the populace. 

The phrase itself originates from Rome in Satire X of the roman satirical poet Juvenal (about AD 100), citing what the roman populace cares about, forgoing both it’s historical birthright or political involvement. In 140 BC. Roman politicans passed a series of laws to keep the votes of poorer citizens, by introducing a grain distribution, and easy to access entertainment [x]. 

It’s also important to remember that Roman culture is based upon the culture of the Greek City States (most importantly the surviving culture of Athens), and for Latin culture the concept of every citizen having not only a right, but an obligation to participate in government. Athens was a direct democracy where all able bodied citizens had to paricipate, vote, sit in juries in order for the government to function. Rome was a republic, and then an empire, but still in those days there was a sitting senate and opportunities for even commoners to participate in government as long as they were citizens. 

Basically, it’s a very latin idea (that is combined Greek and Roman), that the improvement upon society relies on individuals stepping up to contribute. Therefore the mass of the government those who wield power, and the masses those who are subjected to power is almost one in the same. However the pacification of the masses, that is supplying them with bread and distraction to fill their most surface needs and stop them from rising up themselves while it helps a certain amount of individuals secure power, leads to the downfall of society. 

What, I wondered did he mean by society? The plural of human beings? Where was the substance of this thing called “society”? I had spent my whole life thinking that society must certainly be something harsh and severe, but to hear Horiko talk made the words “Don’t you mean yourself?”, come to the tip of my tongue. [...] What is society but an individual?

Osamu Dazai’s, No Longer Human 119-120

What Juvenal is satirizing is the decline of individual heroism, in favor of the satisfaction of the masses. Individual heroism in a sense of the ability of a single individual to stand up and make a difference in its simplest of terms: agency.

… Already long ago, from when we sold our vote to no man, the People have abdicated our duties; for the People who once upon a time handed out military command, high civil office, legions — everything, now restrains itself and anxiously hopes for just two things: bread and circuses (Juvenal, Satire 10.77-81)

This idea of certain forces being used to pacify the masses to make them easier to control is something that appears again and again in philosophy. Nietzsche accused Christianity of fostering a slave morality,

“I finally discovered two basic types and one basic difference. There are master morality and slave morality. . . . The moral discrimination of values has originated either among a ruling group whose consciousness of its difference from the ruled group was accompanied by delight - or among the ruled, the slaves and dependents of every degree [...]  The Christian faith is from the beginning a sacrifice: sacrifice of all freedom, all pride, all self-confidence of the spirit, at the same time enslavement and self-mockery, selfmutilation …” Nietzsche - Beyond Good and Evil

Nietzsche accused Catholicism of suggesting that by making our most cherished values originate not among those who were the best and brightest of their times, but among those who were the most oppressed and impoverished. That this encourages not pride in oneself and one’s own achievements but rather pride in keeping your head down and surviving. Therefore people are encouraged not to be revolutionary but to be ordinary. 

Jesus’ statement itself presents a paradox. “If the meek aren’t meant to inherit the earth, they cannot do this by remaining meek.”

Of course religion asks for faith that all suffering and losses endured in this world will be rewarded in the next one. It can quickly look like an excuse for further suffering in this world, hen people could just as easily work to make a paradise out of this one. 

Nietzsche calls this idea “Slave Morality”. It’s obviously connected with the dynamics of power.

Karl Marx in his critique of Heigel wrote this: 

"Die Religion ... ist das Opium des Volkes" and is often rendered as "religion... is the opiate of the masses."

Karl Marx

The full quote in context is this, though. 

Religious suffering is, at one and the same time, the expression of real suffering and a protest against real suffering. Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people.

The abolition of religion as the illusory happiness of the people is the demand for their real happiness. To call on them to give up their illusions about their condition is to call on them to give up a condition that requires illusions.

In essence, if people were to abolish their habit of simply looking for happiness to distract them from suffering, or even their need to give reason and justice to suffering which is by its nature unjust, then people could directly look at the suffering and then deal with it. 

Of course it’s not that simple, but this is philosophy and philosophy likes to deal in conjecture and abstract terms. 

As shown through Juvenal, Nietzsche and Marx, the tendency of the masses and therefore individuals to forgo deeper reasons to live for instead more on the surface pleasures is what leads to their own ability of making their will manifest. 

It’s all about individual agency. This is a theme that too, comes up time and time again in Tokyo Ghoul. Furuta, perhaps in reference to V’s many own roman references describes basically this as the way that V corrals the masses in “66- Old Guard.”

He mentions both things, food and distraction. Kuzen similarly, says that in his early life with V that he was supplied with a safe dwelling and all the food that he could eat in return for completing their heartless tasks for them. 

Kuzen describes it in different words, but what he feels before meeting Ukina is in essence the same problem that plagued Roma as she was growing up: He was bored. 

Boredom is another word for fulfillment, even if it’s not as poetic. Roma had no parents, no point of attachment, no people in her life no reason to continue living and yet she did. She looked at it and said why? Then she looked around her and saw nothing but people distracting themselves.

Roma was both disgusted, and envious. Envious that they had the opportunity to distract themselves despite being such weak and frail creatures yet she who had been fighting for her survival all this time did not have such a luxury. So Roma made humanity her distraction. 

Roma calls the common enemy of humans and ghouls “boredom” itself. Probably not something Urie could immediately sympathize with, but look back what exactly is Urie’s entire quest for anyway? 

To have his own existence affirmed. Without it, Urie was merely lost. Donato had to ask for him the questions he was putting off asking for so long. He simply suffered without reason. 

Urie’s quest is one for an individual identity outside of his father’s. He is plagued by the same questions then we all are, “Why am I fighting? Why was I born? Why do I exist?”

His answer to this so far though has been to surrender his sense of identity to the CCG above him, and hope that through ascending the hierarchy therefore he will get the affirmation he so desperately desired. He too was bored in a way. He did not have a reason to stand or fight. Too weak to stand on his own feet and fight for his own reasons and therefore he surrendered his power to a higher system and hoped the would make the decision for him.

“The weak wish to surrender themselves to the strong.”

Fura notices this same pattern in Sasaki and Arima themselves, he defines a good person as somebody who can struggle with and accept an answer they find themselves, while the opposite of that is somebody who accepts an answer from on high and nods “Yes, I understand.”

That people who are therefore mentally troubled by what they do are actually healthier than those who aren’t. At which point we reach the final panel of Roma’s monologue, where she casts Kaneki and Furuta in the same role. Conductors of a meaningless parade who aren’t going to bring any meaningful change to the world. 

Why is it that the both of them in Roma’s mind, are different from Aogiri who stated that they actually believed in a world for ghouls, an answer that bored her? 

Is it because they too, just like Roma but unlike Tatara and Eto of Aogiri have no true intention of destroying the cage placed around them, no care to follow through on the future that the both of them promised to their respective sides. “A perfect world without ghouls” and “A world where you walk freely up above.” They are completely different promises but at the same time they are in essence promising the same thing. Bear with it for now, and the world will be better. 

Perhaps it’s because Furuta and Kaneki both on their opposite sides of the game create exactly the kind of gameboard that Roma enjoys to dwell in. That they both lead the masses through distractions and promises, showmanship rather than substantive leadership that might actually bring a better change to the world. 

Furuta sets up a scoreboard, publicizes the gory details of the CCG, sets up executions on the streets as a way of inciting the masses. Kaneki en masse dumps broken Quiqnues in front of the crowds even as they are starving for food. Both of these are demonstrations, put on to convince the crowd. 

They only requires the masses to secede their agency to them, their individual will, to tie their strings collectively to both Furuta and Kaneki, and in return these two kings will supply you with what you need. 

Roma calls both of these so called revolutions for what they really are, “parades” simply a conflict to entertain the masses on both sides and distract them from the suffering of their lives rather than actually addressing it. 

The common evil then shared between humans and ghouls is not their propensity towards violence, but rather their propensity towards boredom. Attempting to fill the void of their meaningless existences causes them to stumble blind through their own lives rather than acting individually and with purpose. 

[championnatalia]

The words had burned into her brain, she had read the letter so many times.

Natasha Nikolayevna Stepanova,

I hear you were chosen for the triwizard tournament, although it is no longer quite three wizards. As you were chosen last, I expect you will be the weakest on your team. Do not be.

I hope to be pleased when I hear of your first task.

To Mother Russia,

Nikolai Ivanovich Stepanov

She supposed she should have been grateful that she had received a letter at all.

But God, she was burning. Not even dancing had helped ease the anger that dripped through her veins slow as honey, heady as vodka. The rage had started with the tiniest seed of him spelling out her full name--her full name--along with a nickname he knew she hated, like she was a stranger instead of his daughter, and had taken root with every cold word. Did her being last truly mean anything? Her father seemed to think so, his small, smooth handwriting that barely filled the tiny roll of paper making a cold analysis of his only blood left.

He had signed the letter carelessly, not cautiously, the spiky signature slightly smeared and the final "v" veering off into a different direction. He had signed those three, useless sentences off like she was an unimportant line on his oh-so-long to do list.

She shouldn't be thinking about the letter. Not now, not at all. It wasn't important.

The Task at hand was important.

She stood over the lake, which almost didn’t seem big enough to deserve that title, hands stuffed into her pockets to keep the world from seeing that they were trembling like autumn leaves in heavy wind. She had seen such a sight before, in the forests of her childhood, and had wanted to snatch the leaves from the tree and let them crumble under the might of her tiny fingers.

Now she was the leaves, and was bound to crumble at any minute.

She stood up straighter. Put her feet into first position, then second, then fourth, then back into first. She would just think of this as a performance, that was all. This was just another dance.

Nothing else.

A dance of death.

Natalia pressed her lips together. Now was not the time to be rattling off the list of dead champions in her brain. That was almost worse than thinking of her father’s stupid, stupid letter.

Besides, Headmaster Vladmska was approaching, a silhouette against the glittering green of the Hogwarts lake. She forced herself to straighten. A performance. Your makeup is immaculate, your hair is pulled tightly into a bun, your body is warmed up, ready to tell the story of a fail--

No. A hero.

“Champions, are you ready? You'll begin in a minute.”

Darting her eyes from side to side, she nodded. Only Katya looked as nervous as she was; the girl’s face was somehow several shades whiter than its usual pale state. Valeriya was stuck in her constant state of la-di-da, and Valya, as usual, seemed more concerned with everyone else--namely Katya--than themself. “Look sharp, Big Sister,” they said, concern tinging their voice as they patted the tall girl on the back, “you seem like you're about to pass out.”

If she did, Natalia would be the first to move ahead. She could hear her father’s voice in her head: “a good leader cuts dead weight if it can never help them again.”

She would cut her dead weight, if she had to.

Katya muttered a response that Natalia didn’t bother paying attention to, and Valeriya said something annoyingly positive. Sometimes it seemed that instead of talking the girl just spewed butterflies and cupcakes into the world. Which was nice, in a way; it could be relied upon, however irritating it was. Now, Natalia took a bit of strength from Valeriya’s light tone, dipping into a plié too small for anyone to notice, and began to pay attention once again.

“You got this.” Vladmska flashed a toothy smile. “Make sure you stick together.”

They had to, didn’t they? How stupid. Natalia was sure that her expression was utterly derisive, a look that, while she wore it often, was not suited to her softer features, but she didn’t care. It was such a silly rule, and she didn’t mind making clear her disdain for it.

Naturally, everyone else seemed on board with it.

Valya pulled a group of four bottles from their robe pockets, sloshing the muddy mixture around. It had an odd color to it, like pesto from one of those odd Hogwarts dishes gone moldy. “Here's the potion. It will last us the hour that we need. I also enhanced the effects of the gillyweed so that we can move underwater more easily. Hopefully the side effects won't be too much of a hassle.”

Side effects?

Well, if she failed because of those, it wouldn’t be her fault. Besides, Valya exuded champion better than any of the rest of them. They were effortlessly confident as they leaned on their heels and passed the bottles around, smiling winningly like the kind of hero one heard about in history books. Valya couldn’t botch this up too badly if they were a hero, could they?

Headmistress Mercier’s voice cut across the chilly air. “Are you ready, champions? Once I fire sparks, you may begin.”

“We wouldn’t be here if we weren’t,” Natalia muttered, examining the bottle. I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t. I’m ready. I have to be.

Her hand flew to the locket at her throat as the her teammates--and even Headmaster Vladmska--snickered appreciatively.

She was a performer, and this was just the beginning of the show.

A sound like a gunshot pierced the air, whistling through it as sparks flew up from the judge’s table. Valya wasted no time, shoving the bottles of potion into everyone’s hands as they uncorked theirs, raised it aloft like it was a toast, and said “bottoms up”.

Katya wasted little time either, grimacing as she swallowed with a single “cheers”. Valeriya, all for eagerness, downed the disgusting-looking potion in one gulp, eyes bright as she gave everyone a cheery “let’s go!” Seriously, did this girl have any other emotion?

She didn’t have time to think on that. Valya was already diving into the water with one fluid motion. Natalia hesitantly uncorked the bottle, sloshing it around. Some potions didn’t always mix everything into one fluid, and it looked like this one was no different. She could see a paper-thin wing stuck to the side of the bottle, and a little piece of something like seaweed floated up to the top.

It smelled like kelp, hazily salty with a dirty mask.

She held her nose, tipped her head back, and drank.

It was slimy against her esophagus, cold and dank and muddy-tasting. She felt like a worm slid down her throat and a moth fluttered its wings against it, once, before filtering down to its stomach where it beat nervousness against the lining.

Her team was already down. With one quick glance over her shoulder--there was a crowd, and a sun, and Headmaster Vladmska--she dove in.

The first thing she noticed was that it was cold.

It was cold, and her robes were heavy and coarse against her pruning fingers, and pain was blooming on the sides of her neck and her feet--no, not my feet, please not my feet, I need to dance, if my feet don’t come back I swear I will kill Valya--and they were there. Waiting.

“First we need to find this mermaid, right?”  Valya’s voice sounded strained; not warbled, but like their voice was a piano that decided to play a newer, higher octave today.

Katya nodded. She looked much more sure of herself underwater, like the salt water had cleared away any creases in her brow and sadness in her heart. “Natalia, you have the locket?”

Natalia felt the chain tighten around her neck. This was it. Her chance.

“Yes, it’s here.” Her voice was even. Controlled. She pulled it out from underneath her robes, the delicate chain sliding against her fingers with each tiny link. “I have a bracelet in case this fails, but it’s a prototype.” And by prototype she meant bad, very bad, in which she recorded her own miserable voice singing without words. But now she looked prepared and competent.

She needed to be prepared and competent. I expect you will be the weakest on your team...do not be…

“I’m sure it will work.” Valya nodded firmly. If she felt like being honest with herself, it was probably to reassure themself, but with Katya’s added affirmation it didn’t sound so terrible. It was easier to lie when more people agreed with the untruth.

“Okay, which direction should we go?” Valeriya asked. Natalia jutted her chin; down, obviously. She wouldn’t be the one to say it, though.

Luckily, after a bit of banter, Katya did, with a bit more dryness than Natalia could muster in an environment so wet, and so they continued.

The environment became even colder, if possible, and browner. Where they had been, closer to the surface, it was a perfect shade or turquoise, light filtering through the little murk there was to create a setting that could have been out of a lush fairytale. Now they were descending into a vague underworld, with blobs that could transform into nightmares floating alongside them.

She felt too fanciful. Life was for business plans as sturdy as oak, not for descriptions that reminded her of a child’s story. Or a ballet, she thought suddenly, and felt her muscles tighten. That was a waste of time, too.

“Does anyone see anything?” Katya asked, her voice vague and senseless. There was a current of anxiety racing underneath it, like the world was too muddled, too senseless.

Maybe that was why she wasn’t uncomfortable with the setting at all. It was home to her, thickly wooded and dense with secrets beyond every trunk. Just underwater without a sprinkle of winter gray that made everything seem more

“This reminds me of a forest. Everything is hidden. So no.”

But just as everything was hidden, everything wasn’t. A glimmer of light caught Natalia’s eye, and she turned towards it, watching it grow steadily brighter and brighter.

“Hey, what’s that?” Valya asked. Their voice was as hushed as it was bold. Natalia didn’t say anything; there was unease growing in the pit of her stomach like a yearling tree.

Katya swam closer, and suddenly it clicked.

“It reminds me of, what was it, a grindylow?” Or was it a hinkypunk? She had never been very good at Care of Creatures, magical or otherwise. Regardless, there was a creature that lured you in with its light for diabolical ends.

“I don’t remember anything about grindylows…”

Natalia tensed; her voice wanted to shout at Katya, tell her to back away. She clamped the need down. “That one creature that lures you in with its light…”

“Yeah yeah, I know what they are. I don't remember them being part of the Task, though?” Valya said. Natalia hummed, pressed her lips together, put these terrible fins in fourth position. A performance.

The light was getting brighter by the second. She could let Katya meet her doom, or show weakness, or…

“All I remember about them is that they are aggressive so let’s go around them.” And that was Valeriya, voice as wispy as her dark side. But she wasn’t calling Katya over, either.

No one was saying anything. Katya was surging forwards, leaving them behind…

Natalia sighed. “How do we know?  Katya!”

The light snapped, turning corporeal. A mermaid: her hair was a thousand different colors curled into one, rich browns and stunning auburns with some gold threaded throughout. Her tail was blue, and scaly, and glittered like it was a coin, or a sun…

Natalia felt something curl inside her chest. God, she’s beautiful.

Instinctively, she dropped into a curtsy. She was not underwater, poor by Koldovstoretz robes; she was in a ballroom, at age eight, meeting a woman that looked like her mother for the first time and trying to remember her manners.

The image faded. Valeriya’s eyes burned into her back.

“Not too fast, Natalia,” Valya murmured. “Don’t want to piss her off.”

She wouldn’t. She couldn’t. “I won’t, I promise.”

Her hands were shaking. The mermaid was smiling. Slowly, she began to unclasp the locket. In a moment, it dangled from her fingers, catching what little light was in the nether-regions of the lake.

A light flash, and the mermaid, once smiling and perfect and beautiful, was a slice of silver against the murky background, wriggling around frantically.

“What was that?” Natalia whispered. This now felt so unlike a forest, where she knew everything that might come across her path. She was a trespasser here, something that didn’t belong.

“A trick,” Katya whispered, and it sounded like a swear. As if her voice was a cue, the fish then popped into one of jelly, cloud-like as it bobbed away.

She reclasped her locket. “What a waste of time,” Katya whispered, and Natalia was inclined to agree. There were...how long had they been down here?

A low snarling came from the cluster of rocks the faux mermaid had been. “That was...odd,” Valya said, a frown carving their features like wood.

“You have fifty-two minutes left.”

They had to get moving, or they’d lose, and that was not a letter she wanted to read. “Wands out?”

“No!” Katya said, forceful in every way. “If it’s a mermaid, we could appear to be aggressive. Just...be on guard.”

Of course. Because just being on guard was helpful.

But then again, if they got attacked she could go get the eggs on her own…

“But if it isn’t a mermaid…” Valya clearly was already holding their wand, deep in their pocket.

The snarls were growing louder. Natalia was wobbling, teetering, slowing.

“No, you’re right,” Valya said, looking like they regretted their first response. Natalia did too, all of a sudden. She didn’t want to die, but...they wouldn’t let them die. The Triwizard Tournament had only passed through all the magical governments after severe safety warrants had been put in place.

Besides, they were champions! Chosen for a reason, not their bloodlines or their skills with a wand. There was something inside each of them--well, maybe not the unicorn princess, but still--that caused them to be chosen.

They were smart. They were ready. And her father--

“Yes, I don’t think mermaids make that sound,” Valeriya said, jarring her out of her thoughts. Her wand was out as she moved to examine the source of the snarling: a cluster of rocks.

It was Katya who spoke up for her now: “We’ll be fine, Natalia’s right.”

And Valya: “Careful, Valeriya!”

The blonde girl turned back to the group. “Okay!” she said, slipping her wand into her pocket and rejoining their little cluster.

She didn’t like that they were a cluster, yet she liked it more than she thought she would.

There was a pause, a beat of hesitation. “We’re not defenseless without wands,” she said. Silence was heavy in the water.

And then it wasn’t.

A creature sprang from the rocks, a blur of brown that almost blended into the environment. It could have been a mermaid, but it couldn’t have. Mermaids in Russia were elegant and graceful; Natalia had gotten the chance to meet a few, since they lived by one of her fathers’ farms. This one was a hag, her fingernails long and yellowed, her hair stringy, her eyes slitted like a cat’s.

“Is that a mermaid?” Valeriya whispered.

“That’s it.” Valya’s voice was just as stunned as she felt. “That’s a mermaid.”

Katya’s voice was a tone of knowing disdain. “We’re in Scotland, of course.”

The mermaid screamed, her head thrown back, bubbles shooting out of her mouth like a jetstream.

“I hate the British,” Natalia said.

Valya nodded, bending into a bow. “Stay calm, everyone. Natalia, open the locket.”

She didn’t want to stay calm.

The mermaid swam up to Valya.

Natalia opened the locket.

A tiny stream of song came through when she opened it, but not much of one. She was fairly certain only she could hear it.

Still, she unclasped the locket.

The mermaid was hissing in Valya’s ear: “Restore me to my former glory.”

Natalia’s eyes darted from side to side. Katya looked like she wanted to intervene but instead dropped into a less-than-graceful curtsy. What could the British mermaid mean, restore her to her former glory? Did the British have any glory that didn’t come from architecture, conquering, or Quidditch? Well, naturally there had to be, but--did she need an object? A new voice? A makeover?

The silence, though short, was stretching on too long. Natalia felt as though she was about to fold into herself. “We will do our best.”

Katya looked as though she was trying to prevent herself from panicking. “Will you tell us how to help you?”

Maybe the answer was music all along. Maybe if Natalia just hummed along to the music charmed into her muted locket, the one she should probably reclasp sometime soon...

The mermaid sneered. “I was once beautiful. A young mermaid: gorgeous, powerful, wanted. But I am now reduced to a withering mess. Restore me back to my former glory and I will let you pass.”

Beauty, beauty...Natalia’s mind skimmed over everything that made her feel beautiful. A perfect wing of eyeliner matched equally on both sides of her face, a compliment from her father, the clean serenity of her home forests, a win in a duel of some kind, a jeté, a plié, the tightness of the leotard against her skin, the movement of the music...

Katya mumbled a complaint. Natalia was too busy to listen as she imagined herself at the barre, going through the movements, trying to think. Maybe a duel for beauty could make the mer see her beauty? But tools for a duel for few and far between, down here.

Valeriya whispered to her, “do you know a good charm to change her appearance?”

But that wasn’t needed to feel beautiful...

Valya pulled their wand from their pocket. “Would this help?”

The mermaid glared. “Glamours don’t work.”

“No!” Natalia hissed at Valya, a solution dawning on her. She turned to the mermaid. “I can teach you things. Dance, music. When you perform, it doesn’t matter.”

Katya nodded quickly. “Natalia is right.”

The mermaid appeared confused, her brow furrowed. She had a nice, high forehead. “You...will teach me to dance?” she asked slowly. Natalia didn’t miss how long the mermaid spent on the word dance, like it was a sweet that she had to suck on for a while to be sure she liked it.

“Yes.” A beat. “I’ve been training all my life.” She began to move her fins into open fourth position: one foot directly in front of another, “heels” lined up.

Valya leaned over to her, whispering: “what kind of charm did you put on that locket again?”

Natalia quickly reclasped it, closed it. “A good one.” Did they doubt her? She had spent hours charming the locket to sing as a gift for the mermaids. “But if she wants to be beautiful, this is how. Do you know anything about dance, O Beautiful One?” The title fell easily from her lips; the mermaid had a gleam of intelligence in her eyes, and a childhood surrounded by those richer and more important than her taught her of the golden rule of getting what you wanted: flattery.

“Yes, I can tap dance,” the mermaid said, bobbing up and down in the water.

Natalia grinned, clapping her webbed hands. “Look! You’re practically glowing!”

Valya nodded energetically. The mer asked, “really?”

“Yes! You’re beautiful.” And she meant it. “When you dance, you’re happy, and that means beauty.”

“I hate tap dancing. My mom forced me into it when I was three.”

Well, that was better for Natalia, seeing as she only knew a few moves in tap. “Do you want to try ballet?”

Katya smiled at Natalia, and Natalia was shocked at how much it changed Katya’s expression from that of a girl with the temperament of an icicle to the expression of a girl that maybe, just maybe, Natalia would like to know. If she had ever had a propensity for friends, that is. “A very reliable source told me it’s the most beautiful dance of all.”

She felt lighter, like she was soaring through a jeté and there was nothing holding her down. Maybe she was smiling, soft and sweet. “It is.”

Valeriya nodded in agreement. “I have a feeling you’ll be a natural,” the girl said with a sly smile, exposing a bit of scrappiness she’d yet to show the group. “It emphasizes fluid movements.”

The mermaid growled, “teach.”

Natalia slowly looked the mermaid over. Unfortunately, they couldn’t do anything quite complicated, or even the foot positions, seeing as the mermaid had no feet. The emphasis would have to be on the arms, in order to teach something worthwhile. At least the mer already held herself like a queen; that was something that would take far too long to learn.

Natalia nodded. The mermaid hissed, “all you join.”

But that didn’t register yet. “The real thing about ballet for you will be in the arms. Your posture is excellent, which already exudes natural ballet skill and elegance.” Then: she was stumbling, disappointment tinging the world. “Oh.”

“I don’t dance,” Katya whispered.

“Nor do I. At all. Ever?”

She found it necessary to glare at them.

“Neither do I but we will learn fast.” Valeriya, at least, was willing to play along.

Valya gulped, clearly nervous. “Okay, I’m in.” They better be, especially because the mermaid was flopping her tail and shrieking “ALL DANCE!”

They attempted a spin. At least they were trying. Shaking her head in amusement, Natalia ran through the arm positions in her head. Fifth would probably be easiest to learn, especially high fifth. So she’d start with that.

Gracefully, she started in first position, her hands low on the body, elbows bended, before fluidly bringing them into high fifth--almost entirely above her head, although still able to see her hands, which were six inches apart. “Put your arms like this,” she instructed, watching her pupils attend to the lesson. The mermaid wasn’t doing so well; her hands lay atop her head like she was trying to knock some sense into her skull. Valeriya was probably doing the best of the group, though. While Katya had made a futile attempt to replicate Natalia’s motions and Valya hadn’t done much but their spin, Valeriya’s motion had been semi-fluid, and her arms had arrived at the position they needed too--if a bit too high over her head. Natalia thought to correct it, but there was little time, and it was key to flatter the mermaid senseless. Perhaps it would be best to provide some contrast first? “Valya, what are you doing? Pick yourself up.”

The mermaid growled. Perhaps Natalia better ease back on that point, then, even though Valya was clearly shuffling to get a better sense of posture. “Decent enough, Katya and Valeriya.”

Then she schooled her features into one of awe. “Oh...my...O Beautiful One, you have mastered this move!”

Valya muttered something sarcastic, too quiet to hear even for an experienced eavesdropper as herself. Natalia forced herself to focus, to keep the light shining in her eyes as she looked over the mermaid’s bad form. “I guess, but Valya, look at this creature of beauty. She’s so graceful.”

She could hear the shuffling sounds of her teammates--and God, when had she started to refer to them in such a way?--trying to prove the mermaid’s beauty to her. “I feel inferior,” Katya said, a smile hiding under the words. It was quickly followed up by Valeriya’s “that was great! I told you you’d be a natural,” and Valya’s “She has outshone us all!”

The lot of them were unbelievable.

“You have forty-three minutes left.”

They had wasted nine minutes. No, Natalia had wasted nine minutes. And without any result other than not being attacked, where were they? Had she done any good?

What would her father say?

The mermaid started swimming towards a seaweed forest growing on the lake floor. “Thank you for dazzling us, O Beautiful One!” she called, not sure if it would do any good.

The mermaid nodded. Parted the seaweed. And pointed down towards a cave.

Everyone immediately broke out into grins. Natalia curtsied. “You are ever so beautiful and kind. If you wish, I could come back later and teach more?” And she liked the idea of that, she really did. Teaching ballet down in a lake without any students around...it sounded like heaven.

The mermaid nodded, and something swelled inside Natalia’s chest.

“Thank you, beautiful creature,” Valya said with a bow.

“It was an honor,” Valeriya added.

Katya turned back to the mermaid. “Yes, thank you,” she said, before adding in a hushed whisper “remember the time limit.”

The time limit. A mark of Natalia’s imminent failure. Instantly, everything came rushing back: the letter, her father, the Task.

She shivered. She couldn’t think of her father in relation to ballet, or she’d cry, and she was being judged right now. Natalia would not be a tragic hero, she’d be an impenetrable one.

If she was a hero at all.

“You have thirty-nine minutes left.”

Natalia waved goodbye and refused to look back. “We should head to the cave. Are we ready?” Valya asked.

She wished she was ready.

Everyone was already in the cave. Checking herself for dignity, Natalia continued.

The cave was a small aperture in the ground that would have been bigger had stalactites and stalagmites not created jagged teeth all around the entrance of the cave. It looked like the maw of some monster, and if Natalia could have thought of anything, she would have. But she was reduced to asking “Katya? Do you have anything?”

Katya pulled out her wand. “I think so. Spongify!”

The rocks seemed to bounce, becoming rubbery and soft. Valya and Valeriya threw a few useless compliments Katya’s way. “Let’s go,” Natalia said, wishing she’d thought of it herself.

Katya nodded. “No time to waste.” Valeriya pulled out her wand and Natalia followed suit.

“We should be prepared for anything now,” Valeriya assured them. This time her voice had some depth to it, some meaning, like it wasn’t just empty positivity. It, more than anything else she’d said, made Natalia feel a little more at ease. “Does anyone see it?” Valeriya asked as their group entered the cave.

“Lumos!” Valya said. A stalactite brushed Natalia’s arm. It felt furry, almost. Soft. If nothing else could be said about Katya, it was that she was quite the charmer.

There were snorts coming from deep inside the cave. “Caution,” Natalia warned.

Valya hoisted their wand farther forward. “I can’t see anything.” It was as though the darkness would swallow them whole, Natalia thought, and then wanted to shove the thought away.

“Wait, let me set up the barrier,” Valeriya said before muttering the words of the spell under her breath. The air seemed to ripple in front of them, and Natalia gave an almost inaudible sigh of relief.

“Quickly, let’s go,” Katya said just as Valeriya chimed “finished!”

She felt a little less tense. “Let’s find this bad bitch,” Valya said, like they were trying to summon the spirit of some Muggle adventure hero.

Which she could understand, but “no cursing, please.”

This new mermaid was young, and beautiful, and the sight of her made Natalia’s chest thud. “Hey, do you need some help?”

Natalia’s mind raced. What might happen if she were to refuse? She curtsied. “Hello. We would like some help.” Another rule from her father: “accept the outstretched hand, just with metal-tipped gloves on.”

The mermaid smiled, her teeth blindingly white. “Of course! I can help you retrieve the eggs.”

The mermaid knew about their task. Which meant either that social circles were limited under the lake, or that she was a trap.

Katya appeared to have the same thought, warning her: “Natalia…”

“Be careful,” Valya warned.

And she was, she really was, only she was a daughter of Nikolai Stepanov, and she would not back down. She would fight clever with clever.

“Before we do anything, we’d like to thank you for your generous offer. Um…” She fumbled to get the locket off her neck and open it. Maybe, just maybe, if the mermaid liked her charm enough, she could toss it out the cave and be done with her. Or, if that didn’t work, the gift would keep the mermaid from attacking them and causing their downfall. A gift was its own form of flattery.

Tchaikovsky began to stream out of the locket. “Thank you!” the mermaid said, taking it for herself. Natalia felt her eyes widen and suddenly understood Valya’s inclination towards cursing.

“Remember the plan,” Katya told her.

“I’m trying.”

The mermaid swam ahead, sticking close to the walls. “Shh, let’s go,” she whispered. Natalia began to swim ahead, trying to stay close to the group as she asked the mermaid a question in a vain attempt to throw her off guard. The last thing she wanted was to be alone with the mer, especially with the warnings everyone else seemed to be whispering as they swam behind her. She quickly whispered, “what happens if we don’t say anything?” to the group before trying to catch up with the mermaid.

“Be careful!” the mermaid called as she beckoned to them.

“Oh, we are,” Natalia muttered, pressing her lips together. Valya cast a spell to enhance the brightness of the dark cave.

The mermaid turned back to them, whispering. “I'm Alessia.  I'm half Siren so I'll be able to sing and charm the Occamy into a lull.”

Valeriya asked, “what about us?”

With a jolt of fear, Natalia realized that Valeriya was right. Sirens...they were the ones who enchanted you with their voice, right? Couldn’t that work on the lot of them and not just the occamy? And if that was Alessia’s plan, then what would she do after that? Rob them? No, that wouldn’t make sense, unless the mer was planning to take their wands.

Natalia gripped hers a little tighter. “Okay,” Valya said, “Keep your spells ready.”

Did they doubt her? Did everyone doubt her? Her mind flew to her father for a fraction of a second, that grating letter, and her body tensed. “Of course.”

“I’ll distract the occamy so you guys can grab the egg!” Alessia said. Natalia was at once struck by how differently she talked than the mermaids in Russia, so informal and cheery. It felt wrong, like a bad chord struck on an instrument. A piano out of tune.

Katya seemed to be in a moment of hesitation, hands in a position that suggested they were about to do something but were unclear what. “This is too easy,” she whispered.

Maybe Alessia really was going to help. Maybe Natalia’s gift had tided her over. Maybe there was a chance.

“She will lull us to sleep as well, remember those ancient Greeks,” Valeriya chided, her eyes filled with worry.

Maybe there was no reason to be. “We can’t fight her,” Natalia whispered. Living with Nikolai Stepanov had taught her that some battles were futile to fight.

“Valeriya could be right,” Katya pressed. “We need to think of something.”

The mermaid started singing. Natalia could feel her body start to sway, like it was an adagio she just had to dance to. Quickly, Valeriya cast “muffliato!”

Katya glanced around at all of them. “Should we proceed with the plan, then?”

There was a moment built from pure hesitation between the four of them. “Well, no need to charm the eggs now,” Valeriya said, breaking the silence.

Valya was twitching nervously. “This is still... unnervingly easy.”

Some things were, Natalia wanted to say. But they were right. This was too easy, especially for a Triwizard Task.

“What choice do we have?” Katya whispered.

“But I can't think of a reason to turn back now,” Valya finished, a look passing between them and Katya.

There was a backup plan, if they needed it. Natalia's hand drifted towards the charm bracelet on her arm. “If we want to scare her away, my prototype wasn't good.”

The muffliato Valeriya cast was wearing away now. Natalia could hear the last few bars of a tuneless song, then a shriek that splintered the air like a knife. “Katya, want to try your x-ray spell?” Valeriya cried out, but there was no response from any of the other champions.

Her insides turned to ice, her heart to snow. No.

The occamy was waking up.

Her teammates’ curses faded into something dull as she numbed, recounting her failures. The mermaid had come up to her, and she hadn't lured Alessia away for safer passage. She hadn't done anything. She was the fourth chosen, and by her father's words, she was useless.

She wouldn't be, she vowed to herself, casting a “glacius!” at the occamy that missed disastrously. She wouldn't be the dead weight that needed cutting.

The occamy’s tail sliced her cheek. “Valeriya…”

Valya flung an obscuro at the occamy. Valeriya started casting the disillusionment charm on Katya.

She felt numb, and dumb, and useless.

“Find the egg!” Valeriya called. Natalia felt something like relief shudder through her. This, this was the task at hand. She would make this a performance worth watching.

With fast fins, she began to try to dart behind the nest, which was behind the occamy and its stinging tail. Only--it wouldn’t work. She was slipping, and sliding, the jagged rocks at the bottom of the cave slicing her fins.

Notmyfeetnotmyfeetnotmyfeet…

She could hear, dimly, the sounds of Katya’s frantic “transparo”s and Valya’s “fuck this!”--even Valeriya’s drone of disillusionment. But what mattered right now was the eggs, huge and heavy-looking in the occamy’s nest. What mattered now was her father’s letter, its formal tone, and the only way to prove him wrong and herself a true Stepanov.

“Guys try not to move too quickly, she can’t see you!”

She had to slow down. She...she had to slow down.

The cave reeked of death. Her feet felt like death.

“I have an idea!” Valya announced. Natalia took a moment to look back at the group--Valeriya, her hair ratty, her brow wrinkled in concentration; Valya, hurling rocks across the cave to distract the occamy; Katya, who, as the tail swung back, was falling, hard, onto the rocky surface of the cave.

Natalia was so close, but Katya wasn’t.

“Serpensortia!” Valya screamed, casting the snake that shot from the tip of their wand away from towards the occamy, who snapped it up quickly.

Thoughts flashed through Natalia’s brain quicker than lightning. “Poison!” she suggested desperately, noting the sudden openness of her path to the nest. Then: “Katya?”

Twenty metres. It was just twenty metres. Why was this so hard?

Her feet stung. Valya was screaming something.

Fifteen metres. I expect you will be the weakest on your team. Do not be.

“Everyone conjure snakes! Towards the opposite side of the room!” Valya’s words only dimly registered. Over her shoulder, she quickly cast “serpensortia!”

Ten metres. With a final spurt of energy, she ran up the slope to the eggs. Almost there. “Should I do anything? I’m closest!” Another serpensortia over her shoulder. I hope to be pleased when I hear of your first task...

“Careful, Natalia!” She couldn’t tell who it was, but the words registered somewhere in her brain. She was almost at the nest.

And then she was there.

It was hulking, and wooden, and each egg looked huge and as Katya hurled another “TRANSPARO!” it looked like something was coming to life, moving and glowing inside these eggs’ silvery shells.

“I THINK IT’S WORKING, KATYA!” Or something was working. But she was built from pure hesitation, and didn’t want to do anything. She was a performer, wasn’t she? Wouldn’t her not grabbing the eggs be quite the show?

I hope to be pleased when I hear of your first task...But did she want her father to be pleased?

Following suit with the rest of the group, she cast a quick “stupefy” at the occamy, then returned her attention to the eggs. She could...she could…

Hands shaking, she cast “reducio.” The eggs immediately shrunk to a size where they could fit in her palm, which is where she put them before stuffing them into the deep pockets of her robes.

She didn’t want to move. “We have to go, now!” Katya yelled.

She rolled the eggs around in the pocket. “Let’s all cast a protection charm! Mine just aren’t strong enough by myself.” Valeriya’s tone sounded urgent for someone who lived in a world where time didn’t exist.

“Bombarda Maxima!” Valya cast at the wall. Natalia forced herself to refocus, rethink. What was she doing right now? Nothing. Nothing important. Shaking her head at herself, she brushed off her robes, trying to maintain some dignity. Katya took her hand and pulled both of them towards Valya and Valeriya.

The cave was doing nothing, despite Valya’s spell. What could cause a gate to open? A key. And what was the key? Her gaze trailed to Alessia. “Singing...What if we sang?”

As if in response, the beautiful mermaid started to shriek. “Damn,” Natalia swore, pressing a hand against the cave wall. It was thick, but if magic was what solved it, there could easily be a hole created big enough for all of them to slip through.

“Sing?!” Valya was incredulous. A pebble knocked against Natalia’s bun, and she hissed in a breath. The cave was raining down rocks on them.

“Hurry!” Valeriya goaded, ducking beneath her hands as the deadly hailstorm of miniature boulders continued. Something seized Natalia’s heart.

“She sang! The cave likes her!”

“The Koldovstoretz Anthem?!”

Katya muttered something. Pressure speared Natalia in the stomach. “Yes! Do it!”

Slowly, voice breaking, Valya began to sing the Koldovstoretz anthem. Katya joined in after a few bars, then Valeriya, then Natalia herself. The sound of their voices grated against her ears, but it wasn’t nearly so bad as the sound of cracking rock above their heads. “IS THIS WORKING?” Valya roared.

She didn’t know, she couldn’t know but “Keep singing! They won’t let us die here!”

Cedric Diggory died during the Triwizard Tournament. So did Adalene Moreau, Teodory Woźniak, Carol Smith--

She began to sing again, her mezzo-soprano voice bouncing off the cave walls. Valya began to move rocks away from one of the cave walls, still singing the Koldovstoretz anthem.

--Anna Karkaroff, Lukas--

The entrance collapsed. Natalia heaved a sigh of relief. They weren’t going to die--at least, not today.

“You have four minutes left.”

Or maybe her father would kill her through his words.

“Go, go, go! Natalia first!” Katya began to usher everyone out of the cave.

“You have three minutes left.”

She began to swim upwards, hand buried in her pocket to make sure the eggs didn’t fall out. The water dragged her and her robes down.

All that mattered was getting to the top. It was so far away…

“Ascendio!” Katya cast, and Natalia felt something like relief wash over her body before she realized that the spell had done nothing but ripple away. The light at the surface was growing brighter, but without help, there was no way they’d be able to make it in the time allotted.

“Valeriya, is there something defensive for this?” she asked. Her arm muscles were straining themselves against the water, and had she not had gills, she would have been gasping for air. Even if it felt foolish to ask the silly girl for something, there could always be a possibility that Natalia had overlooked…

“Natalia! The mermaid!” Katya snapped, and Natalia glanced down to see her protégé slithering out of the rocks.

“O Beautiful One!”

The mermaid was swimming up to meet them, grabbing them all and placing them on her powerful tail. Natalia held on as best as she could, listening to the water rush past her ears and her too-fast heartbeat. She wanted to cry, to scream. “In exchange for getting us up to the surface as quickly as possible, I will dance with you every day that I can,” she promised, feeling her heart sink as she thought of what her father would say to that. You shouldn’t be wasting your time. You are Natalia Nikolayevna Stepanova, and you are the heiress to the greatest tree legacy of all time. Why should you learn to do something for lowborns, for Muggles?

That was the breaking point.

They emerged from the water, coughing and heaving up gallons of water. Everything began to crash down onto her shoulders like it was the lake and she was a mere mortal without the means to breath.

The Task. The letter. Her father’s eyes filled with disapproval, no matter what she did. The forty-nine seconds left on the time that surely, surely, Natalia could have made longer. Otherwise, what kind of champion was she? What kind of Stepanov was she?

She should have quit ballet long ago. She should have quit Koldovstoretz long ago, just lived on her father’s tree farm and waited to come of age to take over the family business.

She should’ve--she should’ve--

Tears like melted snow filled her eyes, and she forced herself to think rationally. Clear her mind and stop focusing only on what her father might think.

She dumped the colorful, tiny eggs onto the dock, half-listening to Valya and Valeriya’s pointless conversation as she waited for the transformation to overtake her body.

The sky was blue. Her feet were numb.

And she was not okay.

She was not able to pretend that her father’s letter didn’t matter, didn’t worry her. She couldn’t. It blazed through her mind like lightning to a sapling, and she was shaking, and it wasn’t from any sort of side effect from any sort of potion. It felt like a forever ago that she had gone under the water and disappeared from the ground, where Nikolai Stepanov graced--or was it cursed?--the world with his presence.

But to him, she was a marionette. And even as Valya put their hand on her shoulder and Katya walked over, even as Natalia made another excuse to keep dancing with the mermaid--Aella, whose appearance now showed off all the beauty she had inside--she felt empty, and alone, and too much like she was being made to dance when she didn’t want to. Her father put the marionette strings around her neck, and if she disobeyed, she felt like she might choke.

What was a world where these three, odd schoolmates made her feel more alright than any blood she had left? What was a world where she was afraid to dance for fear of a reaction? What was she feeling right now, in this cold, empty minute, that made her want to cry?

She was not okay. She was not okay.

She just couldn’t stop performing.

[rockofcalifa]

PART V: 1434

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It was a clear, chilly afternoon when Yesugei arrived in Sarai. He had spent a satisfying, successful month in Constantinople, but at the same time, he grateful to finally be back home.

 Home - well, not exactly. Moscow still registered as home, somewhere deep in his brain.

 Yesugei milled about outside while one of his men entered the Khan's antechamber to ask for an audience. He didn't have to wait long before an attendant came to sweep them inside, past all the glowering less-fortunates he had apparently bypassed in the line. Well, he couldn't help that he was a more important man carrying more interesting information.

 They entered the throne room, full to brimming with advisers, relatives, and general hangers-on. The first few times he'd done this, it had been terrifying, but these days he was less intimidated, more annoyed.

 Yesugei could do it in his sleep. All the formalities had to be observed - first, the introductions, the reading of his title and the name of every other man he had with him; then, the requisite abasements, the bowing and flattery, et cetera, et cetera. The silence of those in attendance who were his friends and the whispers and stares of those in attendance who hated him.

 Ten minutes in, Yesugei could finally get down to business. "My Lord," he said, and one of his men came forward with a heavy, scrolled document - a cue they'd rehearsed on the way here. "I have returned from Constantinople after a month of negotiations, and I am pleased to report a very favorable result. Trade is to resume immediately with an import tax of only five percent, which, as you recall, constitutes a significant decrease from last year's agreement."

 "Very good," said the Khan. "And how did they receive my gifts?"

 "They received them well, sir. And because of your impressive generosity, they told me that they are sending their own gifts with their next delegation."

 "Oh?" The Khan's eyes sparkled at the mention. "Tell me more."

 "I expect the delegation to arrive in the coming months, sir. We will be meeting here to discuss the success of the new trade agreement. Would you like me to continue discussing the trade negotiations?"

 The Khan waved a hand. "That can be taken care of later. And what gifts are they sending?"

 Yesugei tried not to sigh. "I was told to expect a pair of rare Moroccan birds."

 "Very good. That will be all. But - Yesugei - don't leave just yet. I am expecting an extremely interesting guest."

 Knowing the Khan, it was probably a troupe of dancers, a newly captured pirate, or, at best, a locally famous musician. Nevertheless, Yesugei bowed and obediently sought a place to stand at the side of the room, next to one of his colleagues, who leaned over to mutter in his ear: "Welcome back. Unfortunately, you're a couple weeks too late."

 "Why?"

 "This next ordeal - you're the only man in the city who could have prevented it."

 Yesugei squinted at him to show his lack of understanding, but his colleague shrugged as if to say, you'll find out soon.

 A few moments passed, and then another attendant came in, walked directly up to the Khan, and quietly gave him some information, to which the Khan replied with a nod. The attendant rushed out of the room, and then the front doors of the room were flung open, and in stormed a figure closely flanked by two guards - wait...

 Vasilii?

 What was Vasilii doing here? What business did he possibly have in Sarai? Where were his people, why wasn't at least Stanislav here with him?

 Then Vasilii dropped to his knees in a deep bow and Yesugei saw the rope tying Vasilii's hands behind his back.

 "What?" Yesugei hissed, and his colleague nudged him in warning.

 "Great Khan, I come before you as your humble and loyal servant," Vasilii said in clear, fluent Mongolian - and despite his confusion and alarm Yesugei felt pride wash over him because he had taught Vasilii that. "It is an honor to see you despite the circumstances."

 "Rise, child," said the Khan, maybe trying for magnanimity, the effect was obviously belittling, dismissive, implying that Vasilii wasn't to be taken seriously. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

 "Yes, my Lord. I'll make my case in a few words, as there is little that needs to be said. The facts are simple, sir. I have served you faithfully for many years. Not once have I disobeyed you or acted against your interests. On the contrary, I have tirelessly defended your throne in Moscow against those who would usurp it. My Lord, I know you must have your reasons, but I implore you to reconsider your decision."

 Yesugei didn't know what Vasilii had done to land himself in this situation, but as the man spoke he had to physically restrain himself, had to bite his own tongue to keep himself from yelling out to Vasilii that if he wanted to get back home in one piece, he needed to stop. Stop staring so directly, confidently, at the front of the room like he saw the Khan as a peer, not when his big, lovely eyes ought to be pointed ashamedly towards the ground. Stop looking so composed, so unfazed by the journey and the captivity, with not one hair on his head or fold in his robe out of place, not when he ought to appear shaken and afraid in the Khan's presence. In short, stop portraying himself as a competent ruler who could function without the Khan's help and supervision, not when a man like that was not the kind of man the Khan wanted sitting on Moscow's throne.

 "That is correct. I do have my reasons," the Khan responded, and Vasilii's eyes widened.

 "My Lord, if I have done anything at all to offend you or cause you frustration, I did not intend -"

 The Khan raised a hand. "That will be all for today," he said. "You are dismissed."

 Vasilii bowed and was escorted out. The room murmured.

 As soon as the big doors closed, Yesugei leapt forward, shaking off his colleague's cautionary grip on his arm. "What happened in Muscovy?" he asked, a little louder than he'd intended, hastily adding a "My Lord," at the end.

 The Khan regarded him with an amused smile. "Nothing happened. And that was precisely the problem." Some of the advisors sitting nearby hummed and nodded their sage agreement. "It's been far too peaceful in Muscovy of late. The region needs to be destabilized before it gathers too much strength."

 "And so to destabilize it..." Yesugei said, mentally working through the unfortunately sound logic of the Khan's plan.

 "Remove the ruling party and replace it with another one." Yesugei opened his mouth but the Khan answered his question before he asked it. "Dmitrii of Galich is my chosen candidate, but I'm not particular about it. As long as he understands the delicacy of his new position."

 Yesugei bowed. "Thank you for answering my questions, sir. Please excuse me." And with that said, he turned and all but ran back to his place in the back of the room, ignoring the looks he was getting.

 His colleague had been right. If Yesugei had been in town while the decision was being made, it would not have happened like this.

 He needed to see Vasilii. He needed to see Vasilii now. It was all he could think about. But several hours passed before he could politely take his leave from the Khan's assembly; and then another half hour or so for him to locate the building where Vasilii was being kept - a nondescript structure near the palace military installation.

 The guards seemed to have no issue with letting him in; the captain led him inside, unlocking a heavy door to reveal a chilly albeit well-furnished room. Vasilii - solitary, stony-faced, regal - stood facing the door.

 Their eyes met, and Vasilii's guarded expression softened into one of surprise, and then into a smile. "Ambassador Yesugei! It's been too long!"

 "I -"

 Earlier, Yesugei had felt that there were a million things he needed to say. But now that he was in Vasilii's presence, he couldn't get more than a single word out of his mouth.

 Vasilii turned to the guard captain still standing next to them. "Leave us," he said. "I won't create any problems."

 The captain looked over at Yesugei for affirmation. "Go on," Yesugei snapped. "You heard him."

 "My apologies, sir..." the captain muttered, taking one last, suspicious look at Vasilii before bowing and leaving the room.

 As soon as the door was solidly closed behind the captain, the rest of Vasilii's persona dropped and with a cry of "Yegi!" he all but leapt into Yesugei's arms. Yesugei held on tightly, trying to convey through his arms all the warmth and affection he felt, but - that didn't quite cut it, did it. He needed to open his mouth and say something.

 "It hasn't been that long," he grumbled. "Only..." He frowned. How long had it been?

 "A year," Vasilii supplied, pulling away from Yesugei and going to sit on the sofa. It was much colder without Vasilii in his arms. "A whole year since the wedding."

 Vasilii's wedding... Yesugei had pulled all the strings he could in order to be the Khan's representative at that particular event. He'd wanted to revisit his old home and see his old friends - something he hadn't been able to do since his father sent him off to Sarai after the old Grand Prince's death. He'd found Moscow largely the same as he'd left it, unchanged by the passage of time. Instead, it had been the inhabitants of Moscow that had changed. Vasilii in particular.

 It wasn't that the old Vasilii was gone - shades of the bright, endearing boy Yesugei had known in his childhood still peeked through, especially when they were able to converse in private - but he had been augmented by this new, basically-adult Vasilii: taller and wiser; more clever and more skilled; mature, deliberate, and (frankly) very handsome. So, understanding that he only had a week in Moscow and he needed to make the most of it, Yesugei had done as his emotions had demanded of him, staying by Vasilii's side as much as he could and keeping up a steady barrage of flirtatious remarks which Vasilii had playfully reciprocated.

 Nothing came of it, of course. Vasilii was obliged to give the better part of his attention to his fiancee, a pretty and - most importantly - well-connected young woman in whom Vasilii clearly had little interest and who had sent (well-deserved) foul glances at Yesugei at every available opportunity.

 Yesugei joined Vasilii on the sofa. "A whole year? I've been so busy it barely feels like a week."

 "A lot can happen in a year." Vasilii sat casually, torso turned to face Yesugei, his arm resting on the back of the sofa, and leaning his head on his hand.

 "Or even just a month, as I've learned today." He scooted a bit closer. "Look, Vaska. I arrived in Sarai from Constantinople just a few hours ago, and the first time I learned of what happened was when you entered the Khan's throne room. Ah -" He broke off and rubbed at the back of his neck. "I'm making excuses. The point is, I'm sorry; I'm so sorry I wasn't able to prevent this mess. If I'd been here, I could have convinced the Khan not to go through with his plan; I'm sure I could have."

 Vasilii, who had been listening carefully, shook his head. "Please don't blame yourself. You couldn't have known. And, even so, I don't expect you to put your position at risk to try to help me."

 He knew it probably wasn't Vasilii's intention, but the statement hurt. Maybe he wasn't obliged to help, but he wanted Vasilii to feel like he was able to depend on him.

 Vasilii continued. "Wait, so you were there? Earlier today?" Yesugei replied with a nod. "Oh, no." Vasilii covered his face with his other hand. "Now I'm embarrassed..."

 "Embarrassed?"

 "Didn't I make a fool of myself?" Vasilii peered out from between his fingers. "Terrified guy pretending to act all tough?"

 "No. Absolutely not." Vasilii let his hand drop. Yesugei wanted to take it in his own. "It felt like you were about to rip his head off, actually."

 Vasilii smiled sheepishly and looked at the floor. "Well, that's good to hear. I really thought I might pass out in front of everyone."

 Yesugei remembered feeling something like that during his first audience with the Khan. "I'm not sure that your fiery performance is necessarily a good thing for you, though."

 Vasilii sighed and sunk deeper into the cushions. "I know what you mean. He probably thought I was challenging him or something."

 Yesugei felt proud that Vasilii had arrived at the right conclusion on his own. "Yes."

 "I guess it was wishful thinking, but... I wanted him to hear me out. Some part of me thought my arguments would actually convince him."

 "And maybe it did sway him," Yesugei pointed out. "But in front of his court, he can't act like he could possibly be wrong."

 "Mmhm."

 They sat in silence for a few moments before Vasilii seemed to recall something. "I'm being a pretty poor host. Would you like some tea? They'd just brought it before you came."

 "Don't feel like you have to -"

 "No, I insist," Vasilii replied firmly, and he moved to stand - but as he rose, he swayed a little, wincing and bringing one hand up to his forehead, the other to grip the side of the sofa and steady himself. Yesugei leapt up and grabbed him, afraid he'd totally collapse, but Vasilii seemed to quickly regain his balance.

 "Are you okay?" Yesugei asked softly.

 "I'm fine." Vasilii responded equally quietly, avoiding eye contact, and Yesugei tightened his grip on Vasilii's arms.

 "If there's something going on..."

 Vasilii shook off Yesugei's hands and took a step backwards. "I don't want to talk about it."

 Didn't he realize that he was alone here? Didn't he realize that in this city, nobody but Yesugei had his best interests in mind, that nobody was going to go out of their way to even keep him alive? He spoke sternly. "Vasilii. Tell me what's wrong, or I'll come back with a physician and we can find out what's wrong."

 "Fine, sir, I haven't been sleeping, is that what you want to hear?" Vasilii snapped angrily, hands clenched at his sides. Yesugei closed his eyes and let the harsh words wash over him. "In case you haven't noticed, I've been completely alone among people who don't like me, and unless I somehow miraculously ingratiate myself to the Khan, I'm going to fucking die!"

 "Thank you for being honest with me," Yesugei said, regulating his tone and opening his eyes to the sight of Vasilii's defensive scowl. "I'm sorry for pressuring you. If you're having trouble sleeping, I can have somebody give you something -"

 "Do you not think I can do that for myself?" Vasilii's eyes shone, wet. "I don't need your help!"

 "I know you don't need my help!" Yesugei all but shouted, continuing at a near whisper when Vasilii squeezed his eyes shut. "I want to help you. More than anything. I want to make this less difficult for you, but please, you have to stop fighting me."

 Vasilii took a deep, shaky breath. "Okay," he muttered, his voice rising in frustration as he continued to speak and breaking back to a whisper as he scrunched his face up in what Yesugei assumed was an effort not to cry. He'd come here to make him feel better, not... like this. "I'm sorry, I don't - I don't know why I'm acting like this, it's stupid."

 "It's not stupid. God knows what kind of stress you've been under," Yesugei insisted. "If it helps, know that the Khan will touch a single hair on your head over my dead body."

 Vasilii covered his face with his forearm as his breathing continued to become more and more irregular. "You can't - can't just say things like that, it scares me."

 "Oh, Vasilii... I promise I don't plan on either of us getting hurt, okay?"

 Vasilii let out a choked sound, and Yesugei took hold of his free hand, tracing circles with his thumb. Fix this was the only directive in his mind. He's hurt, fix it.

 "When we were little... you would always come to me when you were upset." Stepping backwards, he led Vasilii back to the middle of the sofa, and sat. Vasilii remained standing. "I was the only one who knew how to calm you down. Do you remember?"

 "Yes."

 "Come here, then."

 He lightly tugged at Vasilii's hand, but Vasilii retracted it and swiped at his eyes, only really succeeding in smudging his tears across his face. "I was ten. This's." Sniff. "Different."

 "Not necessarily." He lifted his arms. How long had his heart been racing this fast? Was he making a mistake? "Baby," he said, and Vasilii's breath caught, his shiny eyes widening. "Let me make it better."

 Vasilii gave in, perching himself with a fake-annoyed huff at the edge of Yesugei's lap and slumping forward to rest his head on Yesugei's shoulder.

 "That wasn't so hard, was it?" He put one hand flat on the middle of Vasilii's back, hoping he could feel it through his many layers of clothes. This was a bit more difficult now that Vasilii was physically larger than he was, but he would manage. "Take deep breaths for me," he continued, drawing out the words, and Vasilii complied obediently, pressing the side of his face further into Yesugei's neck.

 But Yesugei didn't have full confidence that what he was doing was working until he dug his fingers into Vasilii's hair, applying a bit of pressure as he stroked the back of Vasilii's head; and Vasilii melted into him, sighing deeply.

 Sweet, strong Vasilii, whom he'd seen grow from an infant to a boy, whom he'd left, who had carried on without him and become this: Vasilii who tried to handle everything on his own, Vasilii who had fought so hard and for so long to keep what he had, Vasilii who had to be ruthless and invulnerable but at the same time was so young and made himself sick with worry.

 It was almost too much. Vasilii smelled like wet grass and horses - Yesugei supposed he probably did too, a byproduct of the long journey - but it didn't matter, not with Vasilii's warm, relaxed weight making him feel... making him feel. Too much because anything more and he might do something stupid, something reckless, something a little too forward.

 A few minutes later, Vasilii seemed to have stopped crying altogether. "I'm going to fall asleep," he said, and based on the way his words ran together, it wasn't a lie.

 "Good, you might as well."

 "Mmmh," Vasilii sighed, scooting a bit closer, and then, then it was too much. He could have stopped himself, but - he didn't want to. He tilted his head a little and planted a kiss right there, on the exposed skin of Vasilii’s neck, so gently he was almost unsure whether Vasilii would feel it at all. But Vasilii did feel it, clearly, because a shudder ran up his spine as soon as Yesugei pulled away.

 Both of them froze - could Vasilii hear his heart pounding out of his chest? was his face as red as Vasilii’s was? - before Vasilii laughed and sat upright.

 "I thought you were trying to help me calm down, Yegi." He gave a little smile. "You might have to reevaluate your methodology."

 "I apologize for my self-defeating behaviors," Yesugei quipped back.

 Vasilii slid off of his lap, sitting back on the sofa, and the return to normal - a happier normal, now - was completed. "Can we talk business again?" Vasilii said. "I'd like to redirect."

 "Go ahead."

 Vasilii paused, sighed. "I almost don't want to ask, but it'll worry me more if I don't know... what the Khan's plan is."

 "After you left, he told us he was replacing you with Dmitrii of Galich."

 Vasilii blew out a huff of air. "That Galich bastard. I'll never see the end of that fucking family."

 "Well, I don't think we've heard whether he accepted the offer or not."

 "He will."

 "And, if he does, we can't know what his intentions are or what sort of coercion he's under."

 Vasilii scoffed again and leaned over to rest his head back on Yesugei's shoulder. "Last time I checked he should be willing to die for the integrity of the state."

 "There are threats worse than just death, you know."

 "Why are you -" Vasilii cut himself off with a long yawn, reminding Yesugei that he did almost fall asleep a minute ago - "defending him so well? Is it in my best interest to assume anything less than the worst?"

 Dmitrii had been his friend too, once, and even though they had fallen out of touch long ago, Yesugei realized that he had never stopped regarding him as such. It was time to put that relationship behind him. "You're right," he acknowledged. "Just keep in mind that it might not necessarily be him that you're up against."

 "Right."

 Vasilii was silent for a minute, and Yesugei turned his head to see him drifting off. "Hey," he said, giving Vasilii a nudge before he stood up. "I'm going to head out, okay?"

 "Aw, okay," Vasilii pouted, lying down across the space Yesugei had vacated.

 "So... just to clarify what happens now..." Vasilii looked up at him with big eyes. "You ought to focus on your health, and on continuing to argue for yourself when you can. Meanwhile I'll see just how influential I can be."

 Vasilii closed his eyes. "Thank you," he murmured.

 Yesugei squatted down and brushed a lock of hair out of Vasilii’s face. "And you'll be okay after I leave?"

 "Mmhm."

 We'll fix this, he wanted to say. I'm certain of it. You'll be back home in no time. Instead, silently, he stood and saw himself out.

  The next available appointment he could get with the Khan was three days away. In the meantime all he could do was wait, over-think, over-prepare, and take care of his other business.

 He did not pay Vasilii another visit. He discreetly sent him an apothecary but he did not visit him. He felt that he had used all of his emotional reserves that night, and if he came back, it would result in Vasilii trying to bolster Yesugei's spirits and not, as it should be, the other way around.

 So Yesugei waited by himself. Was he nervous? Yes, absolutely. Usually, when he came to the Khan, it was with some relatively minor international news that he could spin in a positive way. The stakes were different here. No matter how Yesugei stated his case, and whether the Khan agreed with him or not, somebody was probably going to die. Maybe Yesugei, if he really messed up, but that was unlikely. If he was lucky, it would be Dmitrii or it would be the advisor who suggested this ill-judged scheme to the Khan in the first place. If he was unlucky, it would be Vasilii.

 He had promised Vasilii that he would protect him at all costs. But he wasn't stupid - he knew that if the Khan decided Vasilii was more useful dead than alive, there would be very little he could actually do. He saw how it played out in his dreams: the meeting went south; he bribed the guards to look the other way as he tried to take Vasilii and escape; they were caught, and Yesugei was merely arrested, which meant he got to witness whatever punishing death the Khan's forces had thought up for his companion - something different, of course, every night.

  The meeting was held in a smaller, office-type room, away from the public areas of the palace complex. The Khan, accompanied by two senior advisors, was in high spirits and stood to greet Yesugei when he walked in, taking his hand and warmly encasing it in both of his own.

 "Ambassador Yesugei. My brightest young diplomat. I wonder the reason for this... unprecedented visit?"

 Yesugei bowed. "Sir, I came to apologize."

 "Apologize?" the Khan exclaimed. "Sit down. Whatever do you have to apologize for?"

 They sat. "I wanted to apologize for my absence, sir. If I had been present last month I believe I would have been in a unique position to advise you on the situation with Muscovy."

 "Hm." The Khan leaned back with his arms crossed. "I was the one who sent you away, so of course you're forgiven. Do I recall that you have some sort of special connection to Muscovy? I believe your father lived there for some time?"

 "Yes. I grew up in Muscovy," Yesugei confirmed. "Both Vasilii and Dmitrii of Galich were among my close friends, so I feel I know both of them well, although Dmitrii is closer to me in age." A true but intentionally misleading statement.

 "Oh? That's quite interesting... And what would you have advised me to do?"

 And here was where he might come across as disrespectful. "I don't believe that installing Dmitrii was the safer choice."

 The two aides looked at each other. The Khan leaned forward, interested. "I wonder how you would convince me of this. I know you heard my own arguments the other day."

 "Yes. You theorized that, without conflict at home, Vasilii would turn against you; for another man, this might very well be true. But Vasilii is eager for peace as long as he can keep it. He spent years fighting usurpers for his position, so he's not going to jeopardize it on a gamble with such low odds. I would also reiterate Vasilii's arguments for himself, but you've already heard them."

 "I have."

 Yesugei took that as permission to continue. "Meanwhile, we've heard that Dmitrii has accepted the new position, yes?" He directed the question to the advisors, and one of them nodded. "Was any great effort needed to convince him?"

 "No, I hear he accepted without much trouble," the first advisor said.

 "Exactly." Yesugei, gaining confidence, looked right into the Khan's eyes. "He turns on his superiors easily - his cousin, no less -"

 "So he certainly has no proven record of loyalty," the Khan interjected. "I understand you. You think he is a man of this character?"

 "It disheartens me, but I believe he has demonstrated as much." The advisors fidgeted with their beards. "I have one last point, sir."

 "Go on."

 "You said that in removing Vasilii you hoped to make an impression of your power on Muscovy." The Khan nodded. "I would say that no man has learned this lesson better than Vasilii himself. He's the only one who has experienced firsthand what the consequences of opposing you might be."

 "But, sir," the first advisor said. "When you spoke to him, he seemed rather unfazed."

 "Anyone can put on a brave face for five minutes of conversation," the Khan said. "What do you think?"

 "I -" This was where he struggled to prioritize the mission versus his personal boundaries. He just had to tell the truth. "I spoke to him. He told me in confidence he was very frightened - I'm only telling you this because you deserve to have full information, sir."

 "Sir, imagine," said the second advisor. "If it was your plan all along to reinstall Prince Vasilii to the throne after teaching him a bit of a lesson. It could come across as brilliant."

 "People would certainly talk," the Khan acknowledged. "I'm going to need some more time to think about this."

 "If you were going to send Vasilii back, how would you get rid of Dmitrii? If I may ask?" Yesugei was alarmed at how well this conversation was going.

 "I imagine that would become Vasilii's problem. Yes... I need to think about this." He turned to Yesugei. "Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I know it takes guts to come in here and challenge our conclusions."

 Yesugei stood and bowed. "Thank you for listening to me, sir."

  Yesugei hung around the palace for the rest of the day, and in the early evening one of the two advisors came to share the early news with him: the Khan had changed his mind, and Vasilii was going to be reinstated.

 In other words: he'd done it. They'd done it. They'd won, and Vasilii was going home. Probably.

 He rushed to the palace military installation as quickly as his shorter-than-average legs could carry him, blowing past the guards outside of Vasilii's room, all but letting himself in.

 "Vaska," he panted, forcefully shutting the door behind him.

 "Yegi?" Vasilii rose from the sofa, setting aside some papers he appeared to have been reading.

 "Vaska," he repeated. "I did it."

 "What?"

 Couldn't Vasilii tell what he meant? Wasn't the exuberance Yesugei was radiating enough of an explanation? He stepped closer. "I talked to the Khan this morning."

 "You did? And?"

 "And he agreed! He's going to let you go home!" Yesugei exclaimed, throwing an arm out in what was probably the Khan's general direction.

 "Yegi, oh my God!" Vasilii crossed the room quickly and, once he was standing right in front of him, took Yesugei's face in both of his warm hands, tilting his head up to meet Vasilii's sparkling eyes. "You are amazing. You know exactly what to do, you are so smart, and brave, and talented, and..."

 Yesugei knew he must be blushing - how could he not, with the praise being directed at him, with Vasilii's bright, excited face so close? In this moment, how could he not want - oh, how could he not want to be kissed?

 Yesugei lightly bit his lower lip, a motion which Vasilii followed with his eyes, the smile dropping off of his face slowly, turning into something curious, searching, a little awed.

 "Pretty," Vasilii said, quiet, looking back up at Yesugei's eyes. "You're so pretty."

 Not daring to breathe, Yesugei closed his eyes and waited - just a few seconds, and he felt it.

 Vasilii kissed him softly, unbearably so, like he was unsure. Not enough. Yesugei put one hand on the back of Vasilii's neck, the other on his waist, and pulled him down, pulled him in, kissed him harder. Vasilii froze endearingly and inhaled sharply before giving in.

 Vasilii. He willed the feeling to sink into his bones. God, he wanted to keep this for himself forever.

 Without warning, the feeling was lost. Vasilii pulled away harshly and slapped a hand over his mouth with an audible smack. It sounded like it hurt, and Yesugei winced. "What -"

 Vasilii shook his head quickly back and forth, eyes wide with distress.

 Yesugei pulled Vasilii's hand away, frowning. "What is it?"

 "I'm sorry -" Vasilii yanked his hand out of Yesugei's grip. "I shouldn't have... I don't - I can't -"

 "Okay, calm down," Yesugei said, still confused. Vasilii dropped down to sit on the sofa, hunched over with his hands over his eyes. "Don't apologize, just... help me understand what's wrong."

 It took a few moments for Vasilii to start talking. "Did you know," he started, looking up from between his fingers, "that I have a son? That I'm a father now?"

 Yesugei didn't respond. He hadn't known, and it wasn't a concept he'd ever considered, although he shouldn't be surprised, seeing as Vasilii's marriage was a year ago.

 "Ivan is three months old," Vasilii continued, looking away again. "And he is the most important thing. Everything is for him. I have to be perfect. I can't... have everything I want. I can't - I can't be like this."

 With the whole 'fatherhood' development having occurred so recently, it seemed like Vasilii was still reeling. Yesugei allowed himself to believe that what Vasilii was feeling was temporary. He squatted down and, once again, took Vasilii's hands away from his face. Vasilii stared down the length of the sofa. "It sounds like you're under a lot of pressure right now, huh? Vasilii - look at me." He waited until Vasilii hesitantly obeyed. "I love you. And I have ever since I was three and you hadn't even been born yet. So, while I don't really understand what you're experiencing, I would never want you to do something that makes you feel this upset."

 "So you're not mad? I know you... wanted..."

 "I'm not mad." Vasilii seemed to relax a little at that. "But, can we still..." He looked down at Vasilii's hands, which he still held in his own, hoping that everything they already had hadn't been ruined. "We can be the same?"

 "Please. Yes." Vasilii smiled a little and patted the section of sofa next to him. Yesugei sat, and Vasilii's arm wound around him, pulling him close. So maybe Yesugei couldn't have everything - this was still good. "Thank you. For understanding."

 "Mmhm." Yesugei leaned his head against Vasilii's shoulder, and Vasilii rested his cheek on the top of Yesugei's head.

 "You're a diplomat," Vasilii said, breaking the brief silence. "You travel everywhere, right?"

 "I've been a lot of places."

 "Maybe. One day, you could take me with you? I want to see everything..."

 It would never happen, obviously. Vasilii knew they could never do that. "Anything. Anything you want."

 After another pause, Vasilii sighed. "You've done so much for me. I don't know how I can ever repay you."

 "You don't have to do anything, but..." Yesugei thought over what he was about to say, and whether he wanted to let himself hope for it or not. "If I can ever come back to Moscow, to stay, will there be a place for me?"

 "As long as I'm alive? Yes. But who knows how long that'll be?" Vasilii chuckled. "And we have to get back in first."

 "About that." Yesugei glanced up but couldn't make out Vasilii's face. "The Khan didn't seem overly eager to help get Dmitrii out."

 He felt Vasilii shrug. "It's nothing I haven't done before, and since Dmitrii has no legitimate claim, he won't have many supporters."

 "Sure. But this time it's personal," Yesugei said. "I have a feeling Dmitrii of Galich isn't going to go down easy."

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It Takes a Village? | by IV, V and Me

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It Takes a Village? | by IV, V and Me

Guest Post by IV, V and Me Visit her website by clicking here.

“It Takes a Village”

We have all heard it… shoot, I think I even said it last week, but is ‘it takes a village’ just a phrase or is it really truth? Honestly, this phrase never even crossed my mind until my son was born and all the villagers came out of hiding with the good, the bad and the ugly advice; but this didn’t really bother me until I got some parenting experience under my belt. My son is 9 months old so obviously I am now an expert… even so; I was now ready to bestow my “parenting wisdom” on other moms. As soon as another mom mentioned any struggle she was having with her kids, I wanted to jump in to save the day with my expert advice on the matter… queue the other mom holding back on rolling her eyes as I ask the question all moms know too well “have you tried this?” like she hadn’t googled every possible solution to the problem she was dealing with. Was I really going to be that villager, the one with the pitchfork of advice at the ready any time I talked to another mom? Is a village necessary to survive parenthood? If so, what is truly needed?

Getting to the truth

I decided it was time to actually get other mommy perspectives on the subject of  ‘it takes a village’.  So, I gave a shout out to the Facebook world with 4 questions, two for and two against parenting advice to see if the “village” was more helpful or harmful.

Once you become a mom, something that is needed is thick skin, so that when you do end up receiving unwarranted advice, you can take it with a grain of salt. My friend Jamey W. said it best “I have heard/felt things that while harsh at the time, as I reflected (and minimized my pride) realized they were probably right or at least something there that should be considered.” This is a mom with a teenager and a college student; her answer is why I need to have mentors in my village to explain, “Pride causes us to miss a lot of truth.” Yes, getting offended is a cultural phenomenon, but instead of pouting, I can take what has been said and use it to grow and become a better, more developed person. I learned pride gets in the way of even allowing myself to be surrounded by a village. One obvious way I realized I needed growth in was learning that my son could benefit from being around others.

At first, I was very hesitant to allow other people be around my son, I mean, I made him… I can be selfish, right? But once I got past that, I found how beneficial it was to have others interact with my child. They would play with him in ways that never would have crossed my mind, and truly showed me new ways to love my son.  “It is incredibly valuable to be in community with other people who pour into and love your child– they speak into their lives in a multitude of ways, and it’s powerful and humbling and so much better than doing it on your own. Other people can speak into their gifts, challenges, and behavior in a way that you can’t, and they see the things you have blind spots to.” –Annie M. This is why it is so important to have peers be in my village. Your peers can help you to be more creative with teaching and during play time as Jenna S. saw this as “a refreshing reminder to not let your child play her way right through her days without me, I just don’t want to miss It.” This has also opened my eyes to the fact that controlling every aspect of my life is just not attainable; I need help and support.

            Being a very controlling person, I really wanted to do everything on my own and then… well, exhaustion set in. The other night I broke down (my son has started waking up at 2:00am hyper and not going back to sleep until 3:30am), my husband offered to pray with me as I was rocking our son to sleep and I said, “no, I just want to get Ru to sleep.” It took me about 5 minutes to realize what I needed was my husband to pray over me and once I gave up that control, it was like a gospel choir came rising up singing “Hallelujah”! A wise friend stated, “Praying that the Lord would guide you in each situation and lead you on how to love, affirm, teach, correct, and discipline in a way that is honoring to him. Praying isn’t hard to do, but always feeling prepared and equipped can be hard when it comes to parenting.” This makes me realize that protectors are needed in my village. God allows us to lean on him and others just as a friend who is a fellow new mom has grown to “learn now more than ever to trust in God’s plan and have faith that no matter what, He knows what is best and He is leading our lives.” After recognizing all that was needed for my village to be a great support system, there was something gnawing at the back of mind, something that was missing.

             Out of all the moms I had asked these questions to, one specifically made me realize something most moms are afraid to say “I am one amazing woman and mom.” –Jen H. She is a single mom who has had to learn how to be strong for her and her kids. “But our God is good. And he put me through some tough times that led me to now. And who am I now? A fully functional adult who can clean and not lose her cool; I make doctors appointments and make sure the kids get their fruits and veggies.” This is when I realized confidence is needed in myself for the village. I am my toughest critique when it comes to my skills as a mother but why can’t I admit that some days I am doing a great job or some things I do rock at as a mother. I feel confidence could be such a great tool for us to spur on to be even better, to never stop trying to achieve the goal of loving our children fiercely.

The Do’s and Don’ts

Here are some of the BEST advice moms have benefited from hearing:

“You’re going to make mistakes, they grow up despite us, and they grow up fast so enjoy every moment.” –Jennie H.

“It is the ride of your life! Have fun! Find what works for you and do that.” –SueEllen H.

“Sleep when the baby sleeps” –Candace T., Chrissy S.

“Never let the kids leave the house without saying you love them.  And always say encouraging words to your children.” –Ann M.

“Each difficult stage is temporary and you will miss It.” –Calli K.

“Do what you feel is best for you and your child and not to worry about what others think.” –Amanda B.

  Things to keep in mind NOT to do:

“Saying things like ‘they are going to see it eventually.’  It doesn’t mean they need to see it now!” –Candace T.

“My sister-in-law never had kids and she always told me how to raise them, she would punish them in front of me when they would do something that was no big deal to me.” –Ann M.

“I felt pressured by others to use formula, feed her puréed and solid food, to sleep train when I wasn’t quite ready yet.” –Calli K.

“I have had a lot of people tell me that my daughter is big for her age and maybe I should watch what I feed her.” –Amanda B.

“As I was struggling to get my firstborn to latch I decided to pump and bottle feed her until our latch was successful. My MIL told me bottle-feeding wouldn’t create as strong of a bond as breastfeeding would. My bond with both my children is unbreakable and bottle shaming is as ridiculous and insensitive as breast shaming. Fed is best!” –Anonymous

“People trying to fix problems I’ve been working on forever like my child’s diet or showing distaste for the freedoms I allow.” –Jenna S.

So, is ‘it takes a village’ just a phrase or is it truth?

The truth is, it takes the right village… so choose wisely.

-IV, V and Me

We want to hear from you!

Tell us about the advice you have received, including the good, the bad, and the ugly!

What advice would you want to give new or expecting parents?

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[allah-higherself]

Healing Planet Earth

Revelation 12:11 Deuteronomy 15:12-17 The Hebrew Law in the Senate March 31,1864

The Holy Bible Public Law 97-280 1982, 97th Congress 96 Stat 1211 https://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/STATUTE-96/pdf/STATUTE-96-Pg1211.pd

Declaration: Imani Gray-Bey and (I) Rhonda Arrington-Bey As Naturalized Moorish Americans we reject to be taught Occultism,Witch Craft, Magic,etc, or learn about ourselves from those who are considered Demonic,Un-Clean Spirits. Those who are not Naturalize/Nationality under Our Divine Laws and Principles of Love,Truth,Peace,Freedom and Justice.Who haven’t “Affirm” to Protect,Uphold or Respect Our U.S.A. Constitution.Who have no comprehension of the Importance of Their Higher-Self-Allah and the Demonstration of this Divine Energy.

Koran Questions for Moorish Americans 101′s

70) What is the Higher-Self? The Higher-Self is the Mother of Virtues and the Harmonies of life, and breeds Justice, Mercy, Love and Right.

Dewayne,We have no desire to be taught by those that teach Occultism by those who Represent the Number #3(in a demonic manner),or by other Un-Clean Demonic covens or Sects.Many of these unclean Spirits(Souless)come in a disguise of a Religion”Imply,” Islam(Orthodox Muslim,Catholics,Christianity,Hinduism,etc).The major ones are Islam”Orthodox Muslim,Catholics,and Christianity. This is not everyone but they are the ones that I have seen Represented the Most.

http://clyp.it/2pidyorc My First Experience.“Perceive Muslim,engage forcefully mentally, https://clyp.it/sbbwc35c

As an Awakening Mu’ur Example:Buzzards Circling

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRstgC_xImw

Imagine Dewayne- Many Force Mental Engagements Mentally “Attacks Spiritually,” have come from the “Perceived,” Black Males/Females that “Imply,” to be connected to an Alumni,College/University Graduates, that are over 40 years of age..Too many to count.They seem to use the words “We Got You.” a lot like they are obsessed”possible “Stalkers”; but 99% of them don’t demonstrate to have a Nationality/Naturalized,have no Interest in Implementing President’s Abraham Lincoln’s Executive Will(Liberty and Freedom); But they Speak of “Stopping or Blocking someone from doing it Too many times to count. Especially if one of their male “Brother,#3” try to engage/Flirt and I am not accepting..Imagine

Note: When I continue to stand my Ground of Our Prophet Noble Drew Ali’s Teachings,I have had those that “Imply,” or represent Christianity and Islam use words that can be connected to a Terrorists.This is another way to Force Amalgamate into a Society that Encourage Bondage of the Mind,Spirit and Soul.

Imagine,Dewayne,Many times those who have the “Code,” that cause them to be Telepathic but behave as savages,who are of another kind,(A being)( Possibly Souless and Souls)Try to Force Amalgamate(Marry/Sex),which means they use Fear and Deceit to try to Force Amalgamate with me,My Son, and probably many other Awakening Mu’urs/Moors Forcefully. By using the Science of Thought.

Example:The Lord of the Rings Casting out Devils-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6wE2W3ag1g

This is Testimony of Jesus Casting out Spirits. The Holy Bible Public Law 97-280 1982, 97th Congress 96 Stat 1211 https://www.gpo.gov/fdsys/pkg/STATUTE-96/pdf/STATUTE-96-Pg1211.pdf

http://allah-higherself.tumblr.com/post/155212000027/religious-studies-dewayne-byfield-bey-from-rhonda

(A) Imagine Dewayne-When You or (I) are not Responsive or Accept their Advances willing,These Demonic Spirits( Possibly Souless)Create a situation.(B)Rather walking away as Civilized energies(Spirits) that Represents a Civilized Society,These Un-Clean Demonic Spirits will start Calling You or (I) a Racists among “Their,”Society.Try to demonize you,because they know they are a Legion(Mark 5:9).There are many who have Sold their Souls,or are Souless,that they are in Allegiance with.

The Fellowship of the Ring-A High Wizard Sold his Soul-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4QJwGTOny8

Imagine them Stalking to You Spiritually(this is a Challenge to be proven on the Physical Plane)Constantly Threatening You Via Body Language to Rape.

(1)Dewayne Imagine-One Agenda-To force an Awakening Mu’ur or Awakening Mu’urs to Marry or Latch on to one of them;one of the ”Souless” one of the Unjust;or allow the Souless unclean Spirit to latch unto you.Then when they aren’t successful with trying to Seduce,(using demonic methods of Seduction)in hopes you accept their Engagements(Mental/Spiritually),they Start saying or many(Legion Mark 5:9) “We Paid.”

(1)Never show proof they paid. Never speak of who they paid. Agenda-To speak of Payment is sending an Energy,(A Thought) of Bondage and Slavery in the Universe(Once again taking away from the Words “Acts of Terrorism.” ) Indirectly if Accepted You or I curse ourselves.

Divine Law that Freed Us(Moors/Mu’urs) Deuteronomy 15:12-17  The Holy Bible Public Law 97-280 1982, 97th Congress 96 Stat

President Abraham Lincoln Ratified The 13th Amendment with 20 Section November 18,1865(These Amendments Substantiates Our Freedom and Birth-Rights in United States of America). President Abraham Lincoln Ratified The Initial Emancipation September 22,1862,Supplemental Emancipation January 1,1863,The Compensated Emancipation December 8,1862, The Oath of Amnesty and Reconstruction in December 1, 1863.

(2)When this Legion(Mark 5:9)Speak the Words, “We paid,” it takes away from One of many Truths,Which is, we are among a Legion of Demonic Spirits who use the art of Telepathy To Abuse,To Manipulate,To Rape/Molest,To Subjugate(Force under Bondage)who are opportunists/Invaders who has Built this Unstable,Savage,Under World Society in Fear,Bondage,and everything that harms.The Cultivation of Fear gives these Un-Clean Demonic Spirits a False sense of “Power.”

(3)The Fear Tactics are Uniform Methods,That are definitely 100% Psychological and Spiritual.The possibility of Threatening Rape can Induce Fear if Allowed.Using a Water down Science(#3 in a Demonic,Negative Manner) to Demonstrate Witch-Craft,Occultism,Voodoo,etc. Can Induce Fear as well. Which in Return an Awakening Mu’ur may be Recruited willingly in one of their Demonic Sects and or Covens.

(A)Example:”Imagine,” with my third Eye on a Spiritual plane,I can see wolves protecting me since two to three years.Now Imagine those that are “perceive,” Mexican, Forcefully Invading my Mental Space,and Presenting themselves as Wolves. So now my (Caribbean Angels) have to protect me from them as well. Like they are trying to Recruit. Un-Clean and Demonic Spirits (Mark 5:9)

Remembering most of these Entities,Spirits,Souls,&Souless(Especially the Black American male/female,White American male/Female, haven’t re-claim a Nationality/Naturalized under U.S.A. Laws of Freedom)The Mexican and other Spanish speaking people,The Indian(Pakinstan/Bangledesh),Asains(others)have not been Naturalized in our Laws of Freedom either.

(4)Using a Form of Seduction by Speaking about a Male Loving a Woman,Continuously(while I am working),is a form (Psychological Warfare),where a female or male in time will be Comfortable,hearing A Demonic Male voice in his or her Room or house.

(5) As Awakening Mu’urs,They know many of us don’t know How Deep the Rabbit hole Goes.We don’t know we among those that look like us,but are not the same in Spirit and either are Souless or have sold their Souls.They know we Awake not Ready some of us to Fight this Battle against this Filth,that use Tactics of Rape,Molestation, threats of Murder, in order to Force Amalgamate with this filth. This is all connected to Bondage of the mind,Spirit,Physical and soul if allowed. This is in connection to the Healing and the rise in Vibration of the Planet Earth.

(B) “Imagine,”Many times These Filthy Spirits that Represent the number (3) in a Demonic Manner,will speak about the Esoteric/Exoteric aspects of life Trying to Present themselves as Teachers. These are the “So Called,” Witches,Warlocks, others

Repeat-- Imagine Dewayne- Many Force Mental Engagements Mentally “Attacks Spiritually,” have come from the “Perceived,” Black Males/Females that “Imply,” to be connected to an Alumni,College/University Graduates, that are over 40 years of age..Too many to count.They seem to use the words “We Got You.” a lot like they are obsessed”possible “Stalkers”; but 99% of them don’t demonstrate to have a Nationality/Naturalized,have no Interest in Implementing President’s Abraham Lincoln’s Executive Will(Liberty and Freedom); But they Speak of “Stopping or Blocking someone from doing it Too many times to count. Especially if one of their male “Brother,#3” try to engage/Flirt and I am not accepting..Imagine

1)This includes invading your Room with the Science via Telepathy,

2)Invading Your Mind(Induction of thoughts),

3)Manipulating Your Dreams while You are sleeping in a Sexual or Non Sexual manner(Some Demonic Spirits after that Force manipulation while You are sleeping They begin to think They are “Married,”to You or have a Right to be in Your home or room after they Molest/Rape a female or male.

4) Sending a Sharp pain to different parts of your body that can cause Illness; in return force you or a person to have to seek Medical Attention(cause a Debt).

5)Demonic Games and Behavior-They use Music,Those I work with,with “Help,” obviously from the Government(many Imply to be connected to U.S. Military) will sing a song,That same song.Maybe a few lyrics that are Sexual.Those same words would appear several times. While I am working

6)Imagine(We are among a Telepathic Society) I am at work, the radio is playing on the Speaker a song..The voice on the Radio is attuning to my thoughts where she is saying “Cod Words.” These are “Acts of Terrorism.” She or he could use words such as “Lay Down,”(This word encourage a molestation/Rape while sleeping “Spiritual,”) Find someone new, It could be a song about  having sex or meeting a partner.

(A) Then a male,who is obvious something other than what he seems to be, Appear inside the Restaurant trying to Flirt.The male seems to be Representing the Number #3 in a Filthy and Demonic Manner.

(7)Imagine,them Invading Your mind Forcefully,When they realize their advances aren’t accepted,They start to pat their heads (legion Mark 5:9), Say words over and over gain,to create a Ritual(Planting Thoughts.)They know our minds are like a computer,if they say things over and over again,We as Awakening Mu’urs might,eventually,accept and believe the thoughts they are planting are True. Possibly accept their Filthy Spirits invading our Righteous Minds;Subjugation to their Savage Thoughts and behavior;Subjugation to a Form of their Psychology.

Demonic rituals and games:

(8)Dewayne ”Imagine,” while working feeling a Sharp Pain on different parts of my body when I start to chant (Noble Drew Ali;Loving Dewayne Byfield-Bey;Love,Truth,Peace,Freedom,and Justice)Then a co-worker maybe a(Mexican,Black American,etc)say Stop.Then the pain Stops.

(A)Imagine,Hearing the same co-workers say,We paid,many times.This is a form of trying to Show Ownership.So when they “Force Mental Engage,” They will feel Justified in doing so.  

Dewayne,”Imagine,”Remembering most of these Entities,Spirits,Souls,&Souless(Especially the “Perceive,”(Black American male/female,White American male/Female)haven’t re-claim a Nationality/Naturalized under U.S.A. Constitutional Laws of Freedom.Too many “Perceive,”Mexican other Spanish speaking people,Too many “Perceive,”Indian(Pakinstan/Bangledesh),Asains(others)have not been Naturalized in our U.S.A. Constitutional Laws of Freedom either.

Dewayne,”Imagine,”Many times these Un-clean Spirits will keep saying the words,”You are Alone,” they yell the number (#3).They seem to enjoy demonstrating this Divine Number as a Demonic Energy and most of the time it is used by Un-clean,Souless”Possibly”,Spirits)This is a form of the Induction of Fear(Mark 5:9) The Holy Bible Public Law 97-280 1982, 97th Congress 96 Stat

Dewayne,”Imagine,”As my Third Eye started to opened and I saw there were other planes,I can see an Under World.Those that have this “Code,”(That cause many to be Telepathic but behave as Savages)Operate on this plane(ether) Daily. Whether it is causing Sharp pains to another person’s body, Invading their mental Space(Forcefully)without them knowing,Manipulating the innocent’s(men,women & children) Dreams,Forcing Thoughts upon the innocent when they are Most Vulnerable or sending Words(Speaking) forcefully(Mentally) in hopes to form a communication a connection or attachment.

(A) “Imagine,”An Awakening Mu’ur can think they are thinking their own thoughts,when actually one of these Demonic Spirits have latched on Forcefully and Engage mentally,planting their thoughts.

Clip from the movie,”They Live,”https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0BtLmit4N4

voice recordings while studying at Burger King, hearing Regulars (1)https://clyp.it/oobr1hkk   (2)https://clyp.it/ebprmdz2 (3) 1http://clyp.it/hwdzjeuz (4) http://clyp.it/kza5p3zr

(5)http://clyp.it/0utjmxdc

Imagine Dewayne,Those that practice the Occult Science,Covens, or call themselves Witches,Warlocks,Polytheist, Many are “Possibly,”Souless(Possible A.I.),Many are not in the U.S.A.Constitutional Fold, have been Naturalized,Many encourage or promote a form of Mental/Spiritual Bondage, by their Tongue,Thoughts, or Deeds(Actions),One of many Agendas is to deter Awakening Mu’urs from Re-claiming our or their Birth-Rights and Inheritance. Keep Awakening Mu’urs De-Naturalized(keep or maintain a form of Bondage via lack of knowledge,The Importance of Know Thyself) and Fearful- Use Awakening Mu’ur’s Energy-Mathew 21:42-44

Divine Law that Freed Us(Moors/Mu’urs) Deuteronomy 15:12-17(The Hebrew Law in the Senate March 31,1864)The Holy Bible Public Law 97-280 1982, 97th Congress 96 Stat 1211

President Abraham Lincoln Ratified The 13th Amendment with 20 Section November 18,1865(These Amendments Substantiates Our Freedom and Birth-Rights in United States of America).He Ratified The Initial Emancipation September 22,1862,Supplemental Emancipation January 1,1863,The Compensated Emancipation December 1,1862, The Oath of Amnesty and Reconstruction in December 8, 1863

IMANI GRAY-BEY AND (I) RHONDA ARRINGTON-BEY AS MOORISH AMERICANS REJECT THE SCIENCE THAT CAUSE MASSES TO BE TELEPATHIC AND BEHAVE AS SAVAGE (CANNIBALS)..

Mark 5:9 (Legion) The Holy Bible Public Law 97-280 1982, 97th Congress 96 Stat 1211

Dewayne,I started to Realize there was an Under world Society mask by the Outer Appearance of Religion in New York. Too Many of these Demonic un-clean Spirits “Represent,” Religions such as Catholism,Christianity,a form of Islam, Hinduism, Budhists or non-Religion.I didn’t know how deep the Rabbit hole goes. I will start breaking down my Experience by Experience at a time.

Subject Black/Negro & Pale Skin(White American?) American Occultist Trying to Force Recruit into their Society

(1)”Imagine,” I couldn’t comprehend the obvious attempt to Force Mental Engage by so many So Call “Black/African American women and men.” Many of them would yell the word or say the number #3 or “Brother.” Many after they force mental Engage would speak of how “They Paid,” to be able to do this. I Truly didn’t Comprehend how could those who are Obviously in Bondage Mentally,Spiritually and other ways, can Speak of Paying for an “Divine Energy.”

(2)”Imagine,” It is a challenge to see The “Perceive,” Black American(male/female) being Possibly Souless or those that are Melanated having no Soul. It is easier to picture those that have very little melanocytes or no melan to be Souless.Reality is, there are Too many “Perceive,”Black Americans or those who are considered Melanated who are Un-clean,demonic, in Spirit and are Souless.

(3)”Imagine,” I am still hearing many unclean Energies say,(especially from “Perceive,”Black Female/Male) “We need it.” Like they are obsessed.

The Kybalion Page 38

But the Hermetic Teachings go much further than do those of modern science. They teach that all manifestation of thought, emotion, reason, will or desire, or any mental state or condition, are accompanied by vibrations, a portion of which are thrown off and which tend to affect the minds of other persons by “induction.” This is the principle which produces the phenomena of “telepathy”; mental influence, and other forms of the action and power of mind over mind, with which the general public is rapidly becoming acquainted, owing to the wide dissemination of occult knowledge by the various schools, cults and teachers along these lines at this time. Every thought, emotion

Dictionary of the Bible David Noel Freedman

Spirit- In the Ot.Hebi Rugh means First of all wind and breath,but also the human spirit in the sense of Life Force and even Personal Energy

Spirit,Evil/Unclean

(A)A Spirtual being under Authority of Yahweh who carries out the more negative Aspects of his who carries out the more Negative aspects of his will.

(B)There are synonymous designations for these being, which unlike the evil Spirits in the OT,Operate Independently of God, Seeking to Lead human beings away from obedience of God,Often they are under the Authority of a Single Evil Spiritual Being who is variously name Satan,Mastema, Beliar

ABRAHAM LINCOLN

The Thirteenth Amendment of the The Constitution of the United States

Ratified : November 18, 1865 by ¾ of the Several States

Section-16

All Conspiracies in any State to interfere with lawful right in any other State, or against the United States, Shall be Suppressed; and no State, or the people thereof, shall withdraw from this Union without the consent of three- Fourths of all the States, expressed by an Amendment proposed and ratified in the manner provided in Article 5 of the Constitution

Section -17

Whenever any State wherein Involuntary Servitude is recognized or allowed shall propose to abolish such Servitude, and shall apply for Pecuniary assistance therein, the Congress may, in its discretion, grant such relief not exceeding one hundred dollars for each person liberated But, Congress Shall not propose such Abolishment or relief to any State.

Supplemental Emancipation Proclamation January 1, 1863

“That on the First day of January, in the year of Our Lord one thousand eight hundred and Sixty Three, All person Held As Slaves within any state or designated part of a State, the People whereof shall then be in Rebellion against the United States, shall be then, thenceforward, and forever Free; and the Executive Government of the United States, Shall be then including the military and naval authority thereof, will recognize and maintain the Freedom of such Persons, and will do no Act or Acts to repress such (P)ersons, or any of them, in any efforts they may make for their Actual Freedom

(The United States Constitution of America 1787) Article 1/ Section 8/ Clause 4

To establish an uniform Rule of Naturalization, and uniform Laws on the Subject of Bankrupties throughout the United States..

Rhonda Arrington—Bey and Imani Gray—Bey We as Mu’urs( One of Light) Moorish Americans have belief, faith, and fruition that we can only serve one God. We do not support abide by Treaties that are made with the enemies of ALLAH. The enemies of Love, Truth, Peace, Freedom and Justice, nor do we condemn those that do. So we forgive. We derive our Power from The (Holy Koran Circle 7 chapter IX, verse 22/ Chapter XXXV, verse 23—28, Chapter XLVII, verse 15,16, 17) The Koran Questions for Moorish Americans 70,71,72,73,90,91, (Revelations Chapter 13, verse 8,9,10,16) Revelations Chapter 12, verse 11, 12 ( Mathew Chapter 13, verse 33) Mathew Chapter 21, verse 42—44

We derived Our power from President Abraham Lincoln’s Supplemental Emancipation Proclamation January 1, 1863, Initial Emancipation Proclamation September 22, 1862, The Compensated Emancipation Proclamation December 1, 1862 , Proclamation of Amnesty and Reconstruction December 8, 1863

The Thirteenth Amendment with 20 section, November 18, 1865 ¾ of the Several States

IMANI GRAY-BEY AND (I) RHONDA ARRINGTON-BEY AS MOORISH AMERICANS REJECT THE SCIENCE THAT CAUSE MASSES TO BE TELEPATHIC AND BEHAVE AS SAVAGE (CANNIBALS)..

The Picture down at the bottom are  of  Three Women and One man who are Asiatics from Mexico. They Reclaimed their Moorish Nationality/MOORISH AMERICAN.”

This Message is for the intended Individual or Entity and may contain information that is privileged. If the Reader of this message is not the individual or individuals that I sent this message to, I hereby notify that any copying, forwarding or other  forms of retrieving the message that I have created  is strictly not allowed.  If you receive any of my E-mails by mistake, Please notify the sender immediately by E-mail and delete the original message immediately