#yeah he's really releasing Lights Up with an identity theme on coming out day you guys

[forcebewitht]

Hearts And Spades And Friendship With Games (Disneyland: Ace Trappola and Deuce Spade x MC!Reader) 

The time had finally arrived. You had been waiting for this day for a long time. After a good bit of convincing on both Ace and Deuce's ends for the upcoming spring season, you had convinced the pair to travel with yourself and Grim over to a very magical place- Disneyland. You had been gushing about wishing to go ever since you had heard mentions of the place- after all, there was nothing like that back where you were from. So, here you were. You were now sitting upon a bus and happily chirping away to both Grim and Deuce. Grim was beside you in your seat while Deuce and Ace were directly across from you. Ace snorted after a while, shaking his head and glancing over at you. "I can't believe you're this choked up about a kid's park. Pffft- how childish! Haha!" Deuce sighed and shook his head, sending his fellow friend a glare. "And yet, you agreed to come with us. So, maybe it isn't as childish as you claim." The boys were already beginning to bicker back and forth. Grim shifted over to rest within your lap, gazing up at you happily. "Nyaaaahhaaaa! This is gonna be fun, y'know! Think of all the food! La la la~" You couldn't help but to release a giggle at the monster beneath you, now lightly petting him upon the head. "I am really excited about this, Grim! It seemed so...magical when everyone started talking about it! Hehe." Deuce soon looked over at you with a wide smile, his eyes lighting up and practically dazzling in the sunlight from the outside of the bus. "We're gonna get lots of pictures and souvenirs, okay? I'm going to find something extra special for my mom while we are there." Ace shook his head and snickered, glancing on over at his friend again. "Pleeaaassseeeee. I'll just be on the lookout for some princess material ladies. Hehe." After an eyebrow arch from you, Ace rose his hands in defense and laughed. "I'm kidddddiinngggg, [Y/n]. You're more close to queen material, anyways. Haha!" 

Right as you were about to retort, the bus screeched to a stop. The doors slowly opened, multiple other park-goers now making their way out into the land. Your little ragtag group was the last to get off. You allowed your eyes to widen in wonder and curiosity at the sight of the grand park. Deuce seemed to smile as he gazed up at the grand castle, as though a memory was playing through his head. Grim leapt out and jumped onto your shoulder to get a better view, already singing out his joy. Ace was the last to get off. He seemed to be a bit more passive about it, but you would be lying if you said you didn't see a sparkle in his eyes as well. The four of you now began to walk over to the main entrance with the rest of the crowd. Multiple occurrences began to hit your senses all at once. Children laughing joyfully filled your ears, the sizzling sensations of nearby food trucks wafted out into the air and graced your nostrils with its presence, and the bright and cheerful colors of the park all melded together into one gregarious scene. A warm smile tugged at your lips at the sights. A costumed man suddenly stepped up behind the four of you. The four of you turn around to face him and begin to chat. The fellow waves his hand, sparkles raining down from his fingertips. Four little headbands of sorts appeared upon the head of yourself and that of your friends. A cute little headband with mouse ears and a red polka dot bow popped itself onto Ace's head. For Deuce, another little headband with mouse ears- except with a. starry, deep blue, mini wizard's hat. For Grim, a cute little headband with a sailor's cap had popped onto his head. And finally, for yourself, a pair of white gloved hands that stuck out on either side of your head like ears upon a black headband was conjured onto your head.

Ace began to whine about his headband having a bow on it, to which the staff member laughed. He explained that the headbands were complementary and strode off. You gently poked at one of the hands upon your own headband and giggled. Grim leapt around with his sailor's hat on for joy, already making a beeline for a food stand. Given prompting from yourself, Ace and Deuce soon followed you as you chased after Grim. The monster had grabbed a little ice cream bar in the shape of a mouse's head and was now eating it happily. The rest of you soon followed suit, already snapping a few pictures away and settling down onto a bench. Once the bars were done, the four of you arose and began to travel around to different stands. A roller coaster with water included by the name of Splash Mountain was soon selected, the four of you joyously laughing or groaning out after being soaked so much. After that, a frightening stroll through the Haunted Mansion was taken. The effect of the walk-in "ride" of sorts seemed to have greatly improved over the years- for Ace had leapt into Deuce's arms a couple of times in his own fright. You had to hold Deuce back from punching a few of the more particularly scary creatures in the face while Grim nearly lit the entire mansion on fire. More rides were traveled on, such as Big Thunder Mountain Railroad (Deuce screamed something about his magic bike during that one), some Pirates Of The Caribbean ride (Ace imitated a pirate the entire time and laughed about Jack's Halloween idea from before), Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage (Grim kept saying something about finding a live tuna and eating it), and many more. But nothing seemed to excite the pair of boys more than when your group finally made their way over to the Wonderland themed area. Ace and Deuce were both beside themselves in their joy. Ace madly tapped both you and Deuce on the shoulder, pointing at a nearby costumed park worker. "Look at that card suit guy! I wonder how they get those costumes so exact?!" Deuce followed his gaze, already pulling out his phone and turning to the both of you with a wide smile. "Let's go get a picture!" A giggle from yourself and a shake of your head is all that's given. You soon follow the pair over, Grim slowly making his way over behind you (he had to make sure people didn't step on him a lot). Ace soon grinned wildly and turned to you, eyeballing your form. "Ohhhhhh yeah. That'll be awesome." You couldn't help but to feel worried at the look on Ace's face. The Card Soldier slammed his staff down upon the ground, a dazzling ruby light now surrounding your form. Once the light cleared, you found yourself in an almost identical Card Soldier suit- but yours was red while the worker's was black. The worker gave a nod with another pair of slams of his staff in a farewell, now walking over to greet more park goers. Deuce pumped his fist into the air at the sight of you. "Aaaahhhh- you look so awesome, Prefect! This'll be perfect!" You couldn't help but to grin at the sight of yourself now in the suit, slamming your own makeshift staff upon the ground to accompany the look. Grim laughed and took Deuce's phone, now leaping up onto a high enough ledge to take a picture. He grinned brightly, making motions for all of you to make a pose. "Alright! Nyaha! Everybody say- hearts and spades!" All three of you copied what Grim had said and posed. Once a few pictures were snapped, you found the costume upon you began to slowly melt off of your form. A singular red rose was now upon your top with a miniature card with a heart upon it now clipped onto it in the costume’s place. 

By now, the sun was beginning to set. Grim stayed down below and got a few more bites to eat while the three of you went onto a ferris wheel. The sun was now slowly beginning to set, painting the sky a vibrant array of warm colors. You sighed out in bliss, allowing your chin to cradle within your hand. Ace and Deuce both glanced at each other for a moment and then looked on over at you. Almost immediately, both of their expressions seemed to soften. Ace was the first one to speak up, confident and boisterous as ever. "Hey, Prefect- I have something I want to tell you." Deuce choked a bit on the air and blushed, now gazing at you as well within your seat. "S-so do I! Ahem." You couldn't help but to arch a brow again, peering on over at the two boys. Your gaze flickered between the two of them, their skin seeming to glow and sparkle in the cascading sunlight behind you. At the exact same time, the pair looked up at you and spoke, "I love you, [Y/n]." Ace's expression was rather warm yet still held a flicker of his normal mischief within them. Deuce's expression was all around warm and rather soft in comparison to his normal outbursts of anger from time to time. They both soon began to blush and allowed their eyes to widen at their realization of their exact same statements. Ace and Deuce met gazes for a moment. They glared playfully at each other for a moment and then brought their intense gazes back to you. Your eyes slightly watered as you sniffed and wiped a free tear away, your smile now extending from ear to ear. You brought them both into an embrace, grinning sweetly in the sunset. "...Don't worry. I love you too, boys." Both boys seemed to exhale in relief. Ace raised an eyebrow at Deuce to which Deuce nodded. They both leaned in at the same time, kissing you on the cheek. As you froze and a blush began to spread across your cheeks, they both took their own moments to sweetly kiss you upon your lips in kind. Ace's kiss was fierce- all around passionate and a bit salty to the taste. Deuce's, on the other hand, combated Ace's kiss on the opposing spectrum. A sensation of overwhelming sweetness and a gentle touch was the kiss Deuce gave to you, truly displaying how much the male had changed at heart. You brought both of the boy's into a hug, the pair now settling within your arms. As the sun began to fully disappear beyond the reaches of the park, there was one thing you had to admit. This day had been filled with sugar, a bit of spice...but was all around nice. And the magic was just beginning. 💫

((Hey hey, lovely Readers! I've got something a little different for y'all today! Thought I'd switch things up a bit and give you guys some extreme fluff with a cute little Disneyland writing! Props to @leviskokoro-main for the "idea". Enjoy~💖

[yeoldontknow]

დ content tag game დ

tagged by the loveliest angel @augustbutwinter to do this fun tag. thank you so much my love! 

1. what fandoms have you written for (but do not currently)?  - harry potter, muse, merlin, supernatural, doctor who, sherlock

2. what fandoms are you currently writing for? - kpop only

3. how long have you been writing? on this blog?  - my first actual fanfic would have been when i was about 8? it was for sailor moon but it was literally only in a journal i had. i presume that counts. so that would put us at 24 years lmao - on this blog specifically, since april 2017

4. on which platforms do you post your stories?  - here and AO3

5. what is your favourite genre to write? - aaaaangst lmao and horror/suspense. i love really dark things, and have always had a fascination in writing things that disturb me? i think its from an analytical or psychological perspective, exploring the limits of humanity and processing for myself why these things make me uncomfortable/where i feel them on my body/what is fear vs disgust idk. also very much enjoy fantasy/supernatural. 

6. are you a pantser or a planner? - almost always i have a plan, however there are some fics that come out of nowhere and i just have to write them. examples of this are enough and love; always

7. one shot or multi-chapter? - i usually try very hard to keep things as a one shot, and reserve series for things that actually have substance enough to extend past 3 chapters. lately, all my ideas have been very plot heavy or come from worlds i am very interested in exploring and/or have aspects of emotion i want to work through. if i cant keep it to a one shot (like...under 30k) i will make it a series and ill be angry at myself lmao

8. what is the perfect chapter length in your opinion?  - anywhere from 5-9k is a solid, average chapter length for me. some chapters, in hero for example, need to be more than this because theyre the heavy plot chapters. i have been trying not to focus on lengths anymore, just want to write until the story is told

9. what is your longest published story? is it complete?  - the longest story ive ever written is 154k in a different fandom and yes its complete. at the moment, hero is breaching 98k and i imagine it will be my longest when its completed

10. which story did you enjoy working on the most?  - when it comes to series, hero and time runner will, and always will be, the most special things ive ever done. i feel at home and myself when im writing them. im in love with writing them. the ideas are so strong, and the characters are so loud and clearly defined it just is the best time making art ive ever had. - for one shots, light sakura was truly catharsis. i needed to write that. its the most personal, vulnerable thing ive ever written and will probably never produce something like that again unless theres another major event in my life. also absolutely adored writing molotov cocktail and empty vessels. those are both the easiest 30k ive ever produced

11. favourite request you’ve have written and why (if any?)  - brooklyn is burning was technically a request and im extremely partial to it

12. are there reoccurring themes in your stories?  - oh yeah. usually my female characters are working through bad relationships or finding their voices, seeking identity and power in worlds that dont necessarily provide that. i write what i feel and what ive lived, the worlds around the characters are just exaggerations of reality and my imagination. theres always a little piece of me in my stories, and usually that piece comes down to them learning to trust which is something i struggle with

13. current number of wips?  - please i cannot share this number, not when im ashamed of the amount lmao

14. three things you have noticed about your own writing? 1. smut is insanely hard for me 2. fluff is almost impossible, and could be considered my weakness. happiness is an external feeling, an outward experience. im a very bodied writer and finding joy or finding small bits of romance is difficult (largely because i live alone) so i will over explain aspects of the idol character or highlight small actions in the effort of holding onto them 3. i am still learning to trust the process

15. a quote you like from a published story.

‘Don’t confuse loyalty with strength,’ you say, as he releases you. You remain still, forehead pressing against the bars to get as close to him as possible. ‘I have no allegiance to you. My silence is not owed to you.’

‘Really?’ he says with disdain. ‘It was given so freely the last two days.’

‘Your ignorance proves you have never truly known a woman,’ you taunt. ‘We are always at war, even if we are silent.’

- from: hero - chapter 3

16. a quote from an unpublished story.

Would it have been easier for you both to survive if you could be a needy, fragile little thing - not ready to die, not ready to leave him on his own?

The night before, Chanyeol held you close, kissed you until your throat felt raw, and made you realize he didn’t want it, didn’t need it. He loved the war in you, handled you like a blade between his fingers, skin unmarred by your sharp edges. He didn’t want it, but you wanted it, at least a little. You wanted him to know there were still traces inside you of the girl you lost.

from: time runner - chapter 7

17. space for you to say something to your readers.

hello beautiful loves. every moment you even click on one of my works an angel gets its wings <3

tagging: @yehet-me-up @kyungseokie @jenmyeons @j-pping @jamaisjoons @yoonia @kithtaehyung @inkedtae @kookdiaries @kookingtae @xiaokoo @sunshinekims @biaswreckingfics @ditzymax @sugaurora @bangtanhome @yeojaa @sahmfanficbts @xjoonchildx @writtenwhalien @jinpanman @cutechim and anyone else who would like to do this <3 as always please only do so if comfy! 

[debbiechanclub]

“The Worst Thing in the World” - Matt Jackson x OFC

Title: The Worst Thing in the World

Theme: @12daysofchristmas Day 12 - Mistletoe

Fandom/Character(s): AEW/Matt Jackson x OFC

Warnings: Some cursing and sexual language, alcohol use

Word Count: 2,514

Notes: I’ve done it. I’ve caved and written a Matt Jackson fic. BUT I’ve done it my way *smug smile* Also, I’m honestly pretty pumped about this because it’s sort of a prologue to something in the works? And I’ll just leave it at that. Enjoy!

Find more of my fics here.

Tag squad: @champbucks @hotyeehawman @freshlysqueezedmox @comeasyoudar @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @librathepheonix13 @exe-sadboi-exe @gabbynorth98

“Do you think this is gonna be weird?”

Katrina felt her palms starting to get clammy as she and Violet got out of their Uber. She looked nervously up at the house in front of them, trimmed with festive bright white icicle lights that twinkled in the dark. Normally, she’d be all about a Christmas party with their friends. But the circumstances were a bit different tonight.

Violet gave her a curious look. “Why would it be weird?” she asked; and then she answered her own question as she shut the rear passenger-side door of the car. “Because we don’t work for WWE anymore?”

Katrina just nodded, the fluffy white ball on the end of her Santa hat bobbing with the motion. Violet frowned.

“It won’t be weird. They might not be our coworkers anymore, but they’re still our friends,” she reasoned. “Besides, it’s a blended party, anyway. You know Britt and Adam invited AEW people, too.”

Katrina rolled her eyes when she said that. “Don’t remind me,” she groused and started up the driveway. Violet followed, a cheeky grin on her lips.

“When are you gonna stop pretending you don’t have the hots for Matt Jackson?”

“I do not have the hots for Matt Jackson,” Katrina returned with a look over her shoulder.

“He thinks you’re hot.”

“What? No, he doesn’t.”

“Yes, he does. He told me so.”

Katrina scoffed. “When? Before you sucked his dick back in Japan?”

“Actually, yeah,” Violet bluntly returned. It made Katrina stop and blink dumbly at her as they arrived on the doorstep. She smirked. “And I did way more than just suck his dick.”

The front door abruptly opened. Britt Baker and Candice Larae beamed out at them, drinks in both their hands, red sequined reindeer antlers atop Britt’s head and a green Christmas elf hat on Candice’s. The sound of Christmas music floated out from the house.

“Finally, more girls!” Britt proclaimed. “It’s a sausage fest in here.”

Violet snorted a laugh while Katrina bit back a smirk. That was an ironic turn of phrase, given what they’d just been discussing. Thankfully, Britt didn’t question what was so funny.

“You two look festive,” Candice complimented. She smirked at Violet’s black and red checkered flannel. “You and Page are twins.”

Violet gave her a surprised look. “Paige is here?”

“Wrong Paige,” Britt returned. But she didn’t clarify before she motioned for them to come inside. They all exchanged hugs and proper hellos, and then Britt took their jackets and the bottle of wine they’d brought and told them to help themselves to the drinks and food in the kitchen. They’d arrived fashionably late—which was, as usual, Katrina’s fault—and the party was already well underway. She’d barely taken two steps toward the kitchen when someone called out to her.

“Kat!”

Katrina halted. There was only one insufferable person who dared to call her that. “Matthew,” she gritted.

“Long time, no see.”

He pulled her into a hug. She reluctantly lifted one arm and patted him stiffly on the back. “Yeah, I wish it was longer.”

“That’s what she said.”

She gave him a cruel smirk as he stepped back. “I bet you’re used to hearing that.”

“I’m actually not,” he returned. “And I’d be more than happy to prove it to y—”

“Hey, stranger,” Violet interrupted at the perfect moment. She wrapped her arms around Matt’s middle and gave him a much warmer hug than Katrina had. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, I was just catching up with my best friend Kat, here,” he grinned. Katrina rolled her eyes.

“I’m too sober for this.”

She started toward the kitchen again—but Matt caught her wrist. “Wait. There’s someone I want both of you to meet.”

His hand dropped from her, and he motioned with his head for them to follow. Katrina exchanged a look with Violet, but she just shrugged and walked after him; Katrina expelled a sigh and did the same. He led them into the great room where most everyone had gathered. Matt’s younger brother Nick stood with Adam Cole and a tall, blonde man dressed in a black and red checkered flannel nearly identical to Violet’s. Katrina knew who he was, but she didn’t know him. She presumed he was who Matt wanted them to meet.

“Hey, guys!” Nick proclaimed when he saw them. He exchanged hugs with them both, as did Cole, and then the awkward pre-introduction anticipation set in. Thankfully, it didn’t last long.

“Violet and Katrina, it’s about time you met Adam Page,” Matt said. “Adam, meet Violet and Katrina.”

Adam nodded and tipped his beer toward them. “Hey, it’s nice to finally meet y’all. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Violet smirked up at him. There was a glimmer in her eye that Katrina recognized all too well. She wanted to climb him like a tree. “Only terrible things, I’m sure.”

He smiled a handsome smile. “Well, you’re both from Virginia, right? So you can’t be too terrible. Plus, you clearly have impeccable fashion sense.”

He glanced down at her matching flannel. Katrina watched as Violet fidgeted. Yup, she wanted to fuck him.

“I heard y’all had a pretty intense rivalry with Matt and Nick back in the day,” he added with a glance at Katrina. She grinned.

“Oh yeah, we totally whooped their asses.”

“No, you didn’t,” Matt countered.

“Did too.”

“Yes, we did,” Violet added.

Nick’s eyebrows arched. “Are you shitting me?”

“It sounds to me like this rivalry isn’t settled,” Cole grinned. “Maybe it should be revisited. Your non-competes are up soon, aren’t they?”

Katrina nodded. “Yeah. But as if the TNT execs would let an intergender match happen.”

“You never know,” Nick shrugged. “And even if we can’t make it happen, I’ve already told you that Kenny wants you two in AEW.”

Katrina’s stomach did a little flip. But then Matt’s voice cut into her thoughts like nails on a chalkboard.

“Seriously, let us know when your non-competes are up. I know you’re dying to wrestle me again, Kat.”

He fixed her with that shit-eating grin she’d come to know so well. Her eyes narrowed. “Again, I’m too sober for this.” She looked back at Adam. “It was nice meeting you, but I need a drink.”

He nodded. “Yeah, we’ll get along just fine.”

She gave him a smile and turned to head toward the kitchen. Violet called for her to get her a drink, too, and when Katrina turned to tell her alright, she saw that Matt was following her. She rolled her eyes and kept walking.

“Come on, I was just joking,” he said.

“That doesn’t make it any less weird,” she returned.

“What? What’s weird?”

“Are you serious?” she shot him a look as she grabbed two cups. “You don’t think it’s weird that you flirt with me right in front of my best friend who you’ve fucked?” She ladled out mulled wine from the crockpot on the counter into the cups. When Matt didn’t say anything, she glanced expectantly him.

“Not really,” he offered. “Vi doesn’t care.”

“Well, I care!” she proclaimed. “It’s weird, and you’re not cute, so.” She left it at that and grabbed the drinks to march back into the great room, nearly smacking Matt in the face with her Santa hat as she whirled around, a period on their conversation.

But Matt couldn’t leave it at that, because of course he couldn’t. “Come on, I know you don’t hate me as much as you act like you do.”

“Pretty close. You’re literally the most annoying person on planet Earth.”

He laughed. “Oh, literally? Okay, so you’ve met every single person on planet Earth, then? All seven billion of them?”

She stopped and turned to face him again. “You’re literally the most annoying person I’ve met, then. Far and away.”

He shook his head. “No, that’s not true.”

“Yes, it is.”

“No, it’s not.”

“How do you know?”

“Because you’ve met Nick.”

“Whoa!” Nick proclaimed, suddenly appearing before them. “I am not the annoying one.”

“Yes, you are,” Katrina and Matt simultaneously returned. Matt smirked at her; she scowled at him.

“You’re both equally as annoying as the other,” she clarified.

Matt’s grin widened until he looked like the Cheshire cat. “Well then I’m not the most annoying person you’ve met, am I, Kat?”

Katrina growled in her throat. If there was anything she hated, it was when Matthew fucking Jackson got one up on her. But before she could think of a scathing comeback, Nick cleared his throat.

“Uh, guys. Look up.”

They both glanced at Nick, curious, and then they both looked up. Katrina froze. Hanging from the lintel above them was a small bunch of mistletoe, tied up in a neat red velvet bow—and they were standing right underneath it. 

She reeled back. “Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little.”

Matt rolled his eyes. “Oh, come on.”

“You two have to kiss now,” Nick said. “Them’s the rules.”

Katrina snorted out a laugh. “Yeah, not happening.”

“Why not?” Nick asked.

Her eyebrows arched high onto her forehead. “Seriously?”

“Yeah,” he returned. “If you ask me, I think it’s pretty obvious that you two have some pent-up sexual aggression you need to release.”

Katrina’s mouth dropped. One, that was ridiculous. And two, it gave her the willies just thinking about kissing Matt. He’d hooked up with her best friend! Multiple times! She stole a glance at him out of the corner of her eye and shuddered. It was weird.

She looked back at Nick, eyes narrow. “Well it’s a good thing no one asked you, then,” she bit, and she stalked away from them, ridding herself of the disgusting thought of kissing Matthew Jackson.

* * * * * * * * * *

Thankfully, Violet had been right: the party wasn’t nearly as weird as Katrina had worried it would be. She was happy to see all their friends, and most of them seemed excited at the prospect of her and Violet going to All Elite Wrestling once they could. Which was funny, because they hadn’t really discussed what was next for them. Impact had reached out, as well, and they had women’s tag team championships, and Katrina wouldn’t be opposed to going back to Japan. However, judging by the way Violet had been making bedroom eyes at Page all night, it seemed like he’d already been added to her list of pros for going to AEW. That was fine with Katrina—anything to get Vi away from that Carolina Bastard she’d been hooking up with.

She got what she could of what was left of the mulled wine and decided to step out into the Florida room for a little privacy. Truth be told, she was buzzed and thinking about texting someone, half for advice on going to AEW and half for other reasons; but as she pulled out her phone, the sliding glass door opened behind her. She glanced over her shoulder and let out a groan.

“What?”

Matt stuck his hands into his hoodie. “Jeez, I can’t come see why you’re out here all by yourself?”

She scoffed. “It didn’t occur to you I wanted to be by myself?”

He pursed his lips. “I know you pretty well, Katrina. You’re a social drunk.”

She rolled her eyes, trying to ignore the fact that he hadn’t used the nickname she loathed for once. “Page and Vi seem to be hitting it off.”

She looked at him out of the corner of her eye, gauging his reaction. As long ago as their Japanese fling had been, she had a feeling Matt still had a little crush on Violet. But if he was jealous at all, he didn’t give it away.

“I expected them to.”

Her eyes widened. “Like that?”

His brow furrowed. “What, you think I’m jealous?”

She smirked and looked back at her phone. “You said it, not me.”

“I’m not jealous.”

“Really? Because I think you have a little crush on her.”

“Why am I out here, then?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know, because you’re chickenshit and you know that Page is way hotter than you.”

He gave her a flat look. She let out a laugh and brought her drink to her lips. But it died in her throat at what he said next.

“You know, maybe Nick’s right.”

She lowered her drink to look back at him in shock. He couldn’t be saying what it sounded like he was saying. Could he? “What?”

He moved closer. “Maybe Nick’s right about what he said earlier, when we were under the mistletoe. Would kissing me really be the worst thing in the world?”

Katrina’s nose crinkled as she pushed her phone into the back pocket of her jeans. A smart-ass comment sat at the ready on the tip of her tongue; but, before she could fire it off, Matt was right in front of her. Close. Close enough for her to feel his body heat in the chilly winter air.

“Because, for the record, I don’t think kissing you would be the worst thing in the world.”

His eyes lowered to her lips. She felt her pulse quicken. Matt had never looked at her like that before. It made her feel… something other than aggravation toward him, for once. She blamed the mulled wine. But then he raised his gaze to meet hers, and her senses returned to her.

“You’re full of shit,” she dismissed.

He smirked, crooked and cocky as ever. “Oh, am I?”

“Yeah, you ar—”

He bent forward and caught her lips in his, cutting her off. Katrina made a noise of surprise into his mouth; but she didn’t pull away or stop him, and for a second he just stayed like that, his lips pressed to hers, unsure what to do next, as if he was just as surprised as she was that he’d actually kissed her. But then, slowly, he started to move his mouth against hers. His lips were soft, juxtaposed with the scratchy stubble on his chin. His hands found her waist. Her hand that didn’t hold her drink lifted to slide tentatively up his chest to his neck. He deepened the kiss, gently, testing if she’d let him in. She did. He tightened his hold on her, drawing her body against his. And then, unexpectedly, a breathy, muffled moan escaped her.

Katrina pushed him away like his lips had shocked her. She had not made that noise. Matthew fucking Jackson had not made her make that noise.

His grin was cockier than ever. “What, enjoying it a little too much?”

“It was the wine.” She pushed past him back toward the house, a scowl on her lips and a blush on her cheeks.

“Uh huh,” he smirked after her. “Sure it was.”

She glared at him over her shoulder. “This never happened,” she said, and as she ripped open the door and went back inside, she decided that kissing Matt was the worst thing in the world. Because she knew he was never going to let her live it down.

[pototters]

Strawberry and Cream

A/N: This piece was written for the BnHarem discord server collaboration. The theme was Pen Pal and it was seriously fun to write! It’s my longest piece, yet! Don’t come at me about the title, lol, it’s like that for a reason and you’ll see why.

To see the other fics in the collaboration, you can find them here!

While this collaboration was NSFW, the way that I have written it will allow for my readers who don’t want to read NSFW to still enjoy it without reading the smut. It’s completely SFW up until the fic reads “One year later”. This fic is complete before this line and the smut is just an added bonus for those who want to read it. So, please, enjoy!

Warnings: smut at the very end, face riding, blow job, penetrative sex

Todoroki Shouto x Reader

Words: 7,377

During their third year at U.A., the school thought it would be a good idea to come up with a program to help keep their students connected as they became more individually involved in their work studies. The idea was for future pros to build stronger bonds with their peers anonymously to give them a strong stepping stone to dealing more easily with civilians. 

There was, of course, nothing in place that said students couldn’t meet with their anonymous contacts, but the administrators highly recommended that the students wait at least a month before revealing their identities. The program was assigning interested parties a “pen pal”, and it seemed that it was a fairly popular concept, especially within Class 1-A.

The first day of the program, Mr. Aizawa showed up to the class with a sizable box under his arm. Setting it on his desk at the front of the class, he addressed all of you as he held a piece of paper with instructions. “For those of you participating in the ‘Pen Pal Program’, you will each be given a cell phone with one phone number pre-added to the contacts. That phone number will be your anonymous pen pal. This is completely randomized as there was no record taken of which phones were given which numbers. Also, there were no names assigned to any of the phones as you will be choosing your own from the box given to your homeroom teacher.” Mr. Aizawa patted the box and stared down each and every one of his students. “You all signed up to participate, so come up one at a time, alphabetically, to get your phone.”

You bounced in your seat as your classmates got excited around you and started to claim their own phones. You wondered who would end up being your pen pal and if you would have anything in common with them. Would they be in the hero class, too? Maybe someone from the support classes? The entire class was buzzing as everyone sat with their newly acquired phones.

Before anyone could get too excited, Mr. Aizawa addressed everyone once more. “Oh, yeah, the school administrators would like to remind everyone that this is supposed to be an anonymous program. Obviously, they can’t stop you from revealing yourselves, but they highly advise that you try to remain as such for at least the first thirty days. I’ll give you guys some time with the phones, otherwise you’ll never concentrate on your studies.” In the next moment, Mr. Aizawa was zipping himself up in his sleeping bag.

Your heart pounded as you stared down at the phone you’d picked up and held down the power button. The screen lit up as it booted up. Luckily it was a smart phone, though it was obviously a lower grade version. Not that you were exactly complaining as you watched the phone connect automatically to the school’s wi-fi.

A bout of nerves gripped you as you stared at the soft blue screen, wondering if you should be the first to message or if you should wait for the other person to message you. Before you could chicken out completely, you opened up a new text and sent a quick- 

“Hi!!”

At the same time your message was sent, you received an incoming message. 

“Hello.”

You inhaled sharply with excitement, a wide grin stretching across your face, and you quickly started to type your next text.

“I really want to introduce myself, but we’re supposed to stay anonymous. Does that bother you? Personally, I find it pretty exciting! I guess I’ll just start with something simple? I’m female, in the hero course, and… I would tell you which year I’m in, but that might be too much and make it easier to guess who I am!

If you’d like, you can call me ‘Strawberry’? I really love them and I think it would be a cute nickname. 😊"

You held your breath, almost immediately seeing three waving dots that indicated they were texting back. By the time that the reply popped up, you were smiling like a complete idiot.

“Male. Also in the hero course.

‘Strawberry?’ I like it. I agree, it’s cute. I guess... you can call me ‘Cream’, then?”

Your mouth fell open at the nickname that your male pen pal had suggested, stunned for a moment. Was he serious? That was what he wanted to go with?

“Uh, don’t you think that maybe you should go with something a bit more… appropriate? For your nickname? I mean, Cream is just… well, you know…”

The reply that came back nearly had you doubling over with laughter. This guy was serious!

“I’m not sure what you mean. I just thought Cream would be good because we were paired together and strawberries and cream is my favorite flavor for sweets. If you don’t like it, I suppose I could change it...”

Your classmates looked up as you laughed, suddenly curious about who your pen pal could be that they were so funny. You waved them all off, not wanting to risk finding out who it was. You stared down at the text, a warmth settling in your chest. Whoever this guy was, he was innocently cute and it made you feel glad. At least you wouldn’t have to worry about him making dirty jokes every thirty seconds- not that you didn’t take almost everything into the gutter with you. For this program, however, you felt a desire to keep your interaction friendly and light. Your fingers moved quick and light over the phone keyboard as you sent him your reply.

“No! I like ‘Cream’! When you put it that way, it’s absolutely perfect~”

The rest of the day was spent messaging each other and sharing little bits about yourselves with the other whenever you had a chance. You both strayed away from anything too specific. You talked about your families; how many siblings you each had, if you still had both parents, and other small details about life at home.

Cream was actually a rather interesting person, and you soon picked up on his texting habits. Sometimes his replies ranged from one to three words, or sometimes they were quite lengthy, and there was no in between. Strangely, it didn’t even bother you. You could only hope that the two of you wouldn’t run out of things to talk about and fall silent to each other.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A month passed and you definitely had plenty to talk about. You often spoke on your respective days and disagreements with friends. Whenever you felt something particularly strongly, you shared it with him. He was always receptive. 

If you were happy, he was glad for you. If you were sad, he’d let you pour your heart out and offer words of consolation. If you were mad, he’d let you vent until you calmed down and offer his support or give you another way to look at what had upset you.

Cream was not as forthcoming with his emotions as you were. He tried, you could tell that much, but it wasn’t often that he shared his feelings. When he did, however, he was always quite passionate about it and let you know exactly where he stood. You weren’t sure if he just wasn’t good at expressing himself or if he mostly closed himself off. You hoped that it was the former.

After having texted and sharing so much with each other for so long, the information you shared with him became more and more personal. You were sure you could tell him anything. One evening, however, you found yourself in an argument with him and couldn’t believe how unreasonable he was being. 

Throwing the phone on your bed out of anger, you stormed from your room and headed for the kitchen. There was no sense in continuing the conversation when you were so upset. You didn’t want to say anything you’d regret, after all. Despite being currently angry with Cream, you did still enjoy your conversations with him.

Once you were in the kitchen, you beelined for the fridge and brought out a single sized carton of strawberry milk before slamming the door shut. Opening up the attached straw, you jammed it into the hole and started drinking.

“Is something upsetting you, Y/L/N?” The voice of one of your classmates had you almost shrieking, but you inhaled your milk instead and fell into a coughing fit as you choked on the sweet liquid. Hands were immediately on you, taking your milk away before lifting your hands over your head.

As you sucked in a harsh breath, your watery eyes fell on the face of none other than Todoroki Shouto. You tried to give him a sheepish grin before you went into another fit of coughing, your lungs trying to expel the liquid they had breathed in. Todoroki gave you a sympathetic smile. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you. Just keep your hands over your head until you stop coughing.” The most you could do was flush hotly and nod.

A couple of tears streaked down your face as you tried not to stare at the guy currently grasping your wrists and holding your hands over your head. Just like the other girls in your class, you found Todoroki to be extremely attractive. For you, though, it wasn’t just his looks. You admired his drive and focus, his kindness towards everyone, and his openness in trying to look at things from others’ point of view.

It was a long moment before you realized that you weren’t coughing anymore, but Todoroki was still holding your wrists. You cleared your throat a little, your face feeling even warmer as he peeked up at him. He was watching you closely, though it was probably just to make sure you were okay. “Um, Todoroki, you can let go, now. I’m okay. Thank you.” His eyes widened slightly and he released you, his fingers brushing the tears from your cheeks before stepping away.

“My apologies. I wanted to be sure.” He offered you a small smile before moving past you to the fridge. “You seemed upset before. Are you okay?” It wasn’t strange that he would ask you about it. Being in the same class, the two of you were often paired together and worked really well together as a team. You often sat with him, Deku, Iida, and Uraraka during lunch, too. You definitely considered him a friend.

Returning his smile, you picked your milk back up and gave an experimental sip. “Yeah, I’m okay. Sort of.” Your smile turned rueful as he raised a brow at you while pulling out leftover soba noodles. “Pen pal trouble, I guess. We… got into an argument.” You scrunched up your nose as you took a seat at the kitchen island. “Pen pal? Maybe ‘text’ pal would fit him better?” You giggled a little. Todoroki sat next to you with his noodles, popping off the top of the container. He nodded slowly as he listened.

“So, it’s boy problems, then?” Your face flushed brightly. While your pen pal was certainly male, you’d hardly classify it as ‘boy problems’. It wasn’t as though you were dating him or had a crush on him. You… didn’t have a crush on him, did you? You tried not to think about having a crush on someone you’d never even met in person.

“T-Todoroki, it’s not like that! ‘Boy problems’ don’t apply to this situation.” You knew about Todoroki’s misunderstanding of basic social concepts from time to time, and always did your best to explain things when you could. He really was too adorable, sometimes. “I’ll explain it later, but that’s not what’s going on here.”

He slurped up some of his noodles as he stared at you, chewing slowly before swallowing. You couldn’t help but notice the way his neck moved as he did, following the line of his shoulder to his strong biceps. A shiver ran up your spine as you imagined those arms surrounding you. “Anything I can help with, then?”

You snapped out of your daze, flushing brightly at being caught lost in thought. A bright smile flashed across your face as you shook your head. “Nah. I’ll work it out with him. I just needed a minute to cool my head before I made an idiot of myself.” You glanced away. “I can have a tendency to say things that I don’t mean when I’m angry.” He smiled at your words, his eyes lighting up.

“That’s good that you know that about yourself. I’m sure that’s helped in a lot of situations.” Your eyes met his and you felt your heart leap.

“Yeah, it really has.” You took another sip from your milk before speaking, again. “You signed up for the program, too, right? How have you been getting along with your partner?” His eyes darkened slightly at your question for a slight moment before going back to neutral.

You watched him as his hand slipped into his pocket and he pulled out the school-issued phone for the program. “Yes, I did. My partner is very nice. She’s interesting. I think… I may have said something to her that I shouldn’t have, or maybe in the wrong way. I’m not really sure, though.” His brow furrowed and you felt your heart sink just a little. His ‘text’ pal was a girl, then.

Shaking your head free of the thought, you offered Todoroki a sympathetic smile and a pat on the arm. “If you’d like, maybe I could help you fix it? What did you say?” The heterochromatic boy fixed his gaze on you and shook his head politely.

“No, I think I might take a page from your book and just talk it out with her.” Picking up the phone, he slipped it back into his pocket and started cleaning up from his snack. You gave a shrug and drank the last of your milk.

“Well, if you change your mind, you know where to find me.” You tossed the milk carton in the recycling. “See ya later, Todoroki!” He smiled and gave you a wave as you left the kitchen and headed back to your room. You felt better now that you’d spoken to Todoroki and were ready to try mending things with Cream.

When you picked up the phone, however, there was already an apology and you quickly responded to work things out. By the end of the night, the two of you had completely made amends and were speaking normally again as though the argument had never happened.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several more weeks passed and you found yourself looking forward to your evening chats with Cream. Your conversations had lessened as your studies had increased, the only time you could find to chat were now at night just before bed. You wished you had more time in your day, but hero work was nearly all-consuming.

Cream had become an important part of your life, though. You felt closer to him than even your friends in class. You were even sure that you were falling in love with him. It was an odd sensation to feel such a close attachment to someone you’d never met face to face. However, you couldn’t deny the beating of your heart or the flutter in your stomach each time you received a text from him.

Even as you felt yourself developing a strong bond with Cream, you also noticed how much closer you were getting with Todoroki. You found yourself confused and unsure of what to do. Two boys and you weren’t sure where to turn more of your attention.

Todoroki went on frequent morning runs and usually you went with him. He had invited you to go with him one morning at the beginning of the school term and it had turned into a regular thing. As you prepared yourself to join him one morning, you found yourself wondering about how he was doing with his own text pal.

You struck up the conversation as the two of you jogged at an even pace. “Todoroki, did you ever work things out with your text pal? I never did ask you.” He glanced over at you briefly and gave a shrug.

“Yes, we talked it out. Things have been fine since then. What about you? You seemed pretty upset back then about yours.” You copied his shrug, but you weren’t able to stop the smile that spread across your lips.

“Yeah, we were able to recover. I think that we’re actually doing better, now.” You were quiet for a moment, contemplating. You didn’t want to push Todoroki, just in case, but you wanted to gauge his thoughts and, possibly his feelings, towards you.

Todoroki was patient and waited quietly while you decided on your next words. You were distracted a moment, though, when he took a slight lead on you and you were able to glance over every inch of his muscled arms and legs. Needless to say, your imagination took off in a million wild directions. The light sheen of sweat on his skin made you want to lick it off-

“Y/L/N?”

Todoroki’s voice brought you back to reality and you shook your head, smiling a bit sheepishly. “Sorry. I was just thinking.” You blushed as you covered up your true thoughts with your more innocent ones. “I just was wondering what you thought?” He gave you a reassuring smile, though his focus remained on where he was going. “Do you think… it’s possible to fall in love with someone you’ve never met?” Your voice had dropped to nearly a whisper, but Todoroki had definitely heard you as his head snapped around to face you, his eyes widening.

Your eyes mimicked his as you started to panic. Had you said something wrong? Todoroki stopped running and you skidded to a halt a few steps ahead of him and turned back. His brows had furrowed in contemplation and his eyes had darkened somewhat. You could tell that your question had more of an impact than what you’d intended.

As you approached him, his eyes lifted to yours and seemed to be searching. You would have given every possession you had to know what he was looking for. “I’m surprised you asked me something like that. I can’t say I’ve ever given it much thought. Maybe Mina or Tsu would be able to provide better advice?” Your gaze softened and your body eased as you understood. “Maybe it is, though.” Your blood ran cold.

What did he mean by that? Was he talking about his own text pal? Had he fallen in love with her and just not realized it? And you had held his hand and led him straight to the conclusion. You did your best to smile. “Maybe.” You halfheartedly agreed before turning from him to continue the run. You soon heard his steps following behind you. The rest of the run was quiet between you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Finals were approaching and everyone was busier than ever. You found that you had started to tiptoe around Todoroki while your relationship with Cream had taken off. The two of you had decided that it was finally time to meet and reveal yourselves to each other. The date was set for the day after final exams to avoid being too much of a distraction for each other.

You were constantly smiling and humming to yourself and your friends noticed. After they’d spent countless nights badgering you, you finally confessed that you’d be meeting your text pal. They barraged you with questions, wanting to know who he was. You still didn’t know, though, as you had both decided to keep the anonymity until the actual meeting.

The day after finals couldn’t arrive any faster and you were bouncing around your room as Mina helped you pick out the perfect outfit. In the commons, the other girls fawned over how great you looked and wished you luck on meeting your text pal. You barely caught sight of Todoroki staring at you from the couch. Was he blushing? If he was, it was only a little bit.

Feeling that you had ruined your chances with Todoroki, you didn’t dwell on it and headed out of the commons. The location the two of you had selected was a small ice cream shop just on the edge of the city near campus. It was a pretty popular spot and it was pretty busy. Luckily, you were able to place your order of strawberry ice cream and find a table close to the street on the outdoor patio.

Fishing out our phone, you sent Cream a quick text that you were at the shop and seated outside. You waited for a reply, but one didn’t come in right away. Not at all worried, you set the phone on the table and started eating your ice cream. Your nerves were twisting your insides, equally nervous and excited.

It wasn’t until you were halfway through your ice cream that you finally received a text. It was an apology. He wasn’t coming. Your heart sank as you read his excuse. Apparently, his agency that he was interning with had called him in for an emergency. Hope fluttered in your chest, however, as he offered to meet you the following day, instead.

You almost laughed as he asked if they could meet at the same place. Cream was disappointed that he had missed out on the ice cream. With a grin, you took a picture of your mostly eaten treat and sent it to him.

“Definitely could have used some help eating it!”

His reply was almost immediate.

“Are you sure? Looks like you’re making enough progress on your own. :P”

A grin lifted your lips at his cheeky comment.

“Yes, I’m sure! See you tomorrow, then? I’ll make sure to grab two spoons.”

“Yes. Tomorrow. I look forward to it.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day arrived and you again headed to the ice cream shop. You managed to dodge your friends to avoid any prying questions. You didn’t want to admit that the previous day hadn’t worked out. Even if he had a perfectly good excuse.

However, as you waited, you gradually got a sinking feeling. Sure enough, a text came in and disappointment gripped you as he announced that he would not make it, once again.

“My father, this time. I’m sorry. I told you about him, so you know how he is. Usually, I ignore him, but this was unavoidable, unfortunately. Intern related. I’ve been scouted at several agencies and he wants to go over all of my options.”

It was true that Cream had painted his father in a less than pleasing light and you understood why Cream had to give his internship priority. It didn’t make you hurt any less, though.

“Okay. I understand. Tomorrow, then?”

It was a couple of minutes before there was a response.

“Actually, I won’t be free again for another two days after tomorrow. Instead of ice cream, why don’t I take you somewhere nice to make up for it? Maybe that one restaurant that you mentioned was your favorite?”

You blinked at the message, unsure of how to respond. You didn’t feel any better about being stood up, again, and the restaurant he was offering to take you to was a pretty pricey one. Sighing heavily, you messaged back.

“No. Ice cream is fine. I’ll meet you on that day, then.”

You didn’t wait for his response, this time, as you left the shop and headed back to the dorms. Your feet felt heavy and your heart was sporting a decent sized crack in it. Mina noticed how down you looked and tried to cheer you up, seeming to sense not to bring up the meeting with Cream. Along with a couple of the other girls, Mina took you up to her room where the group of you could watch movies and talk about nonsense and hero work.

The distractions were nice, keeping you from dwelling too much on Cream and how he had left you hanging a second time. You didn’t want to think about the doubt that was slowly growing in your heart or whether Cream really wanted to meet you or not.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Todoroki put his school-issued phone in his pocket with a deep frown. He really hated that he had to cancel on his text pal a second time. It ate him up inside to imagine what she must think of him. Strawberry was the best thing that could have happened to him.

After failing to secure a connection with you, Strawberry had been there to fill the void. She was so much more than someone just filling a void, though. It had taken you asking about the possibility of falling in love with someone without meeting them that brought it to his attention. He wasn’t sure, however, until recently.

It was possible. Very possible, in fact, and he was so sure that he had fallen in love with Strawberry. She was easy to talk to, kind, and never ran away from their arguments. She always faced any problems they had head on and was usually the first to offer solutions and never pointed fingers. 

Todoroki really respected the way she never demanded an apology, either, giving him the time and space to do it on his own. Strawberry was often the first to apologize, though. Given his past, it usually took him more time to come to the conclusion that he may have been insensitive or said something that could have been easily misconstrued. She never held a grudge and was quick to forgive him every time.

The warmth he felt whenever he texted her was incomparable, and how was he repaying her? By standing her up on the most important part of their relationship and meeting face to face. He could only hope that she would forgive him for this, too.

The next few days seemed to drag by. Todoroki wanted nothing more than to meet you and he was feeling anxious. He practically ran towards the ice cream shop, only to realize that he’d missed his turn a few blocks too late. As he turned around to correct himself, there was a spray of glass beside him and something collided hard with his body, knocking him to the ground.

Recovering quickly, Todoroki realized that a villain had run into him after just robbing the jewelry store he was passing. As an upcoming hero, Todoroki couldn’t ignore the situation and immediately took matters into his own hands. 

There were three robbers in total and Todoroki single-handedly apprehended them all, then called the police. As he waited for them to arrive, he remembered his date with Strawberry and pulled out his phone. Dismay filled the pit of his stomach when he saw that it had been smashed. He silently prayed that Strawberry would still be at the ice cream shop by the time he finished with the police.

The police made Todoroki come into the station to file an official report after questioning him. It took well over an hour to file the report and Todoroki bolted from the police station at a dead run towards where he hoped she was still waiting. It was three hours past the time he’d agreed to meet with her and he doubted that she would have waited so long after being stood up twice, but he couldn’t help keeping that small light of hope.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A week had passed since you had been stood up a third time by Cream. This time without even a single text. You had sent several to him without even one reply the entire week. It was two days before graduation and you were supposed to return the phone within the next twenty-four hours.

You sat alone on the couch in the commons, hugging your knees to your chest as you stared at the silent phone on the coffee table. Had it all been a facade? Had Cream pretended to want to meet you the whole time? Tears welled in your eyes until they spilled over and you buried your face in your arms. You were thankful no one else was around to witness your embarrassing display.

“Y/L/N?”

Your head jerked up and you quickly swiped away your tears as your gaze was drawn to who had spoken your name. It was Todoroki and you offered him the best smile you could, which wasn’t very much. Alarm took over his features as he realized you were crying and he immediately joined you on the couch. “What’s wrong? Should I get some tissues?” Your smile warmed at his concern and you sniffled as you shook your head.

“No, you don’t have to do that.” Reaching forward, you picked up the phone from the coffee table. “It’s just that I never got to meet my text pal and… I think he only agreed to meet me, but never wanted to. He kept coming up with excuses, and now he won’t even message me at all. It’s been a week and the phone has to be returned tomorrow.” Your voice cracked at the end and a few stray tears escaped the corner of your eyes.

Todoroki frowned, not really sure what to say. His heart was aching over his predicament with his own text pal. He’d tried to get a replacement phone, but since the program was entirely random, the administrators had no way of knowing which number he’d been assigned. He’d been at a total loss. He couldn’t ignore your tears, though.

His hands found your face and he gently wiped away your tears. You were his friend, even if you had drifted apart lately. Your wide eyes met his gaze and he gave you a gentle smile. “I wish there was something I could do to help, but we both know I’m not great at social interactions.” You blinked at him, your eyebrows furrowing.

You sniffled and wiped your nose with your sleeve. “Todoroki, what are you talking about? You’ve really grown over this past year. I think you’re really great in social situations, now.” You smiled back at him, much warmer than before. Lifting your hand, you offered him the school phone. “Maybe you could look at the messages and tell me what you think? Did he ever want to meet me, at all?” Todoroki’s eyes grew wide as you unlocked the phone and pressed it into his hand.

You had placed your trust in him and he couldn’t turn you down. Not when you smiled at him like that. Even though he knew that you weren’t being completely honest about his advancements in social settings, he couldn’t refuse you. Despite himself, he looked down at the phone and opened up the messages. He frowned as he saw several messages that you’d sent that had no reply and immediately scrolled up to older texts.

Todoroki’s hands shook as he immediately recognized the messages. He took his time in reading every single message that you’d sent since his phone had broken. They ranged from angry to hurt and back to angry, again. You had turned your face from him as he looked through the texts and he stared at you for a very long time before he could speak.

You were Strawberry and you’d been right in front of him the entire time. How had he not seen it? He should have noticed right away considering you’d held his attention for far longer than the pen pal program. If he could have asked for anyone to be Strawberry, he would have picked you. Words could not describe just how happy he was to have found you.

Leaning forward, he set the phone down on the coffee table and turned his body towards you. “I wanted to meet you more than anything. I never wanted you to feel like you were being played with, or to make you cry like this. My phone broke, though, and there was no way to get a new one-” Your gaze snapped back to him, confusion coloring your features.

“What are you saying, Todoroki?” Your gaze held his and he reached out to you. You didn’t move away, but you didn’t lean towards it, either. Your heart kicked into high speed as you watched the emotions that filled Todoroki’s hetero-chromatic eyes. Was he trying to make you feel better by pretending to be your missing pen pal, or could he actually be…

“I’m Cream, and you’re Strawberry.” Todoroki smiled. “Because you picked Strawberry first, so I picked Cream for my favorite sweet.” A slight frown muddled his features. “Although, I’m still uncertain why you tried to get me to pick something different…”

Relief and happiness spread throughout your body as he recounted your very first conversation. Your limbs moved before you gave it much thought, your arms wrapping around Todoroki’s neck as you embraced him tightly. His arms took barely a second before they were wrapping around you, too. “I promise I’ll explain everything, Y/N, if you’ll let me? You aren’t too mad at me, are you?”

You sniffled as fresh, happy tears slid down your cheeks. “Only a little bit, but I’m mostly just really glad that it was you all along.” A shaky laugh left you as your hold on him tightened and he did the same. “I had the biggest crush on you for the longest time.”

Todoroki felt his face flush at your confession, his heart rate picking up speed. “And now?” He hesitantly asked you.

Very slowly, you loosened your grip on him and pulled back just enough that you could look him in the eyes. You felt heat rise to your face as you blushed brightly. “Now? Even before I knew that it was you, I… I’m in love with you, Todoroki Shouto.”

A rush of relief overtook him and his mouth was suddenly covering yours in a heated kiss. You gasped in surprise, immediately feeling his tongue invade your mouth. As he explored your mouth, a small groan escaped you and he held you even tighter. You were consumed by him.

Todoroki was thrilled to have you in his arms. He’d thought that he lost his chance to make a connection with you, but he’d been getting to know you all along. He had allowed his heart to shift from you to Strawberry after your last run with him, thinking that you loved someone else. Was it destiny that you were Strawberry all along?

He didn’t care. He had you and that was all that mattered to him. Never had he wanted to kiss someone as much as he’d wanted to kiss you. He would have been content to do so for the rest of the night until the front doors to the dorm suddenly opened and the two of you wrenched apart.

A fierce blush overtook your features as the rest of Class 1-A returned. A few of them that had come in first paused at the door to stare at the two of you. Mina was first to break the silence. “Oh, thank whatever gods exist! You two finally got together! The tension was killing me!” 

As your other classmates laughed in good nature, you covered your face and a pleased flush colored Todoroki’s cheeks as he smiled. Your classmates huddled around the two of you to tease and congratulate you, milling about as all of you eased into conversations about what you’d all be doing after graduation.

It was two more days until graduation, and your high school lives would be ending. However, for you and Todoroki, things were only just beginning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One year later…

Strong, but gentle hands gripped your hips as they tried to pull you back to bed. You giggled as you let them, turning around to face your lover. “Shouto, I’m hungry…” You mock whined, not really complaining that he wanted to pull you in for another kiss.

You attempted to pull away, again, but he wouldn’t let you. A grin spread across his face as he tugged you back into bed and settled you over his body. “Maybe I wanted to eat you for breakfast?” You gave a breathy laugh that quickly transformed into a moan as his left hand found your slick folds where you straddled his waist.

His cold fingers had you whimpering and he knows well enough by now to know exactly what you want. His hands gripped your thighs as he helped ease you up his body until you were straddling his face, a mischievous smirk on his lips. A shiver passed through your body, feeling the contrast in temperatures on each of your thighs. “You’re so beautiful, Y/N.”

A high-pitched keen fell from your lips at Shouto’s warm tongue slipped between your folds and slid along the length of your slit until he found your clit. Your thighs clamped around his head, your hands flying to grip his hair as he sucked your clit into his mouth. His hands moved around to grip your ass, holding you in place as he teased you, his tongue suddenly turning cold.

You gasped at the temperature change, eliciting a moan from you when his tongue dipped down to your entrance. His tongue flashed between hot and cold as it explored within your tight inner walls, seeking the spot that he knew would have you seeing stars. You panted heavily as your fingers tightened in his hair, barely keeping up with the changing temperatures that left you shaking in his hold.

Shouto brought a hand around your hip, slipping between your legs to press his thumb against your clit. It wasn’t until you felt a searing heat that you realized it was his right hand, your head falling back on lewd moan. You ground your hips against his face as his tongue inside you went cold, needing more of his contrasting temperatures. 

The tightened cord finally snapped when he switched hands on your clit, the temperatures between his thumb and his tongue suddenly switching making you orgasm hard. You cried out and reached for the headboard to help keep yourself upright as you rode out your orgasm, still grinding against his face. “Sh-Shouto…” You moaned his name as his hands gripped your thighs, again, and he slowly lapped up your release.

Your hips jerked as his tongue ran along your sensitive folds and you whimpered softly. Letting you lift yourself, Shouto smiled up at you and licked his lips. “You taste like strawberries and cream, Y/N.” Your face flushed, as it did every time he said that. He made the same comment every time he ate you out. Even though you were sure that you definitely didn’t taste like strawberries and cream, it made you smile as it reminded you of how the two of you got together. 

Shouto wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he watched you climb down his body until you were nestled between his legs. His eyes blazed with heat as you took his hard cock into your hand and gave him the same smirk he’d given you before eating you out. Your tongue darted out to capture the leaking pre-cum from his slit, making him hiss with pleasure.

Not wanting to tease him too much, you closed your mouth over his swollen head and sucked hard. Hips jerked as he groaned, his fingers threading into your hair and gripping tightly. You slowly sucked in his length, your tongue gliding over each prominent vein along his girth. A low string of curses escaped Shouto as the tip of his cock hit the back of your throat and you swallowed him down until his pubes tickled your nose.

His grip on your hair tightened until tears pricked the corners of your eyes, holding you in place until you tapped his leg to indicate you needed air. With a deep moan, he loosened his hold and let you ease back so that you could breathe, again. Once you’d taken a deep gulp of air, you dove back in and filled your mouth with his length.

Shouto was always reduced to little more than a puddle whenever you went down on him. The pace your mouth set as you swallowed him down was perfect, making him a mess of moans. Just as he was getting close, the tension building in his groin, you reached a hand to cup his balls and massage them gently while your other hand stroked his length when your mouth wasn’t covering him.

A string of curses fell from Shouto’s lips and his grip on your hair pulled you down fully on his cock as his hips jerked, spilling his hot seed down your throat. You happily drank him down and waited patiently for his grip to ease on your hair so that you could pull off of him. The moment you lifted off, he was pulling you back up to him.

You grinned at him. “Hm. You taste just like strawberries and cream.” Shouto grinned at you as he held you to his chest and pressed sweet kisses to your lips. You returned each one, shivering as his hands caressed over your skin. He wasn’t done with you.

You squealed with delight as he suddenly flipped you onto your back and he smothered you with his body. His mouth covered yours with a passionate kiss, tongue slipping between your lips with ease. You moaned, feeling his thick cock pressing against your thigh, and lifted your hips off the bed as you tried to get more of him. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders to pull him closer, and he obliged.

Reaching between your bodies, Shouto angled himself until his tip teased against your entrance, making you mewl until he pressed himself fully inside you. You shared a moan with him at the sensation of him filling you so perfectly. Shouto had to take a deep breath to steady himself as he felt your inner walls fluttering around his cock. “So tight… Y/N…”

You lifted your legs and wrapped them around Shouto’s waist, urging him to move. “Shouto… please… ah~” Your pleading seemed to do the trick as he pulled back and snapped his hips forward to fill you, again. You cried out at his forcefulness, fingernails digging into his back as you held on for dear life. 

You did your best to meet the delicious and relentless pace that Shouto set, pleasure overriding your senses. His mouth closed over the juncture of your neck, his teeth latching onto your skin as he bit you. The added pain to your pleasure made you moan loudly, your head falling back against the pillows.

Shouto moaned as he released his teeth from your neck, feeling your walls clench tightly around his cock. His hips stuttered slightly as he felt himself near the edge. Reaching between your bodies with his right hand, his fingers found your clit and massaged sloppy circles over it to push you closer to your release.

It wasn’t long before he had you plummeting over the edge and your orgasm washed over you as you cried out his name. “Shouto!” A harsh curse fell from his lips as your walls quivered and clenched over his cock as though trying to milk him for his own orgasm. It worked as he found himself following your release, painting your insides white with thick ropes of his cum. 

His thrusts finally stilled when he had finished filling you with his seed. Panting heavily, your hands found Shouto’s face as you pulled him to you for a sweet kiss. He returned it, then proceeded to pepper more kisses over your face and neck as you both basked in the afterglow.

You smiled blissfully as you matched each of his kisses until his mouth found yours again. It was a long moment before he pulled back from you, sighing as he rested his face against your neck. “I love you, Strawberry.” Your smile warmed at the nickname as you held him close.

“I love you, too, Cream.”

[georgiaswarr]

georgia warr

never been in love - gatlin

a song about wanting to be in love but not being able to be in love, which is very fitting for georgia’s initial situation. i’ve put this at the beginning of this playlist because - spoiler alert - the last song on here is also called never been in love and i think these two songs symbolise georgia’s journey in a very mint way. also, the first line of this song is “that boy from georgia was so sweet” which i think is pretty funny

somebody to love - queen

the title says it all. georgia wants to find somebody to love. i mean, she’s already found them, but we’ll get to that later.

paradise - coldplay

georgia is a big dreamer and yearner and i think this song really encapsulates that on so many levels. i mean “when she was just a girl / she expected the world / but it flew away from her reach / so she ran away in her sleep” that’s georgia !

tous les garçons et les filles - françoise hardy

french song because i’m ~quirky~ but this song is basically about seeing everyone else be in relationships and feeling lonely/wanting one for yourself

waiting for love - avicii

georgia is a hopeless romantic, but she’s still waiting for her own grand romance (she still hasn’t realised that the “love” she’s “waiting for” has already “come around”)

dear no one - tori kelly

georgia “i want someone to be in love with but there is no one” warr, at least at the beginning of the book

chaos - miki fiki

this song can be interpreted with various themes of the book in mind such as yearning for something you don’t have, feeling lonely, emotional turmoil, etc, it’s a banger

i walk a little faster - fiona apple

highjacked from @kindaorangey’s loveless playlist (they’ve done a great rundown here). this song has similar themes to dear no one, anticipating that romance will come to you, but it hasn’t, despite how hard you chase it, how fast you walk

when - dodie

shoutout to @drarrystar for recommending this song to me because so many of the lines reflect georgia to the core. just look up the lyrics and you’ll agree

deeper - ella eyre

“cause i’m scared, i can’t lie / i don’t feel the same inside / i can’t decide if i have the heart to confess” georgia thinks she can learn to love jason romantically if she just digs a little deeper

loneliness for love - lovelytheband

“anything at all not to feel alone / anything at all just to feel whole / ‘cause i keep mistaking loneliness for love”

a little more - alessia cara

“there you are with your college friends / you played in a marching band / i can't help but wish i knew you then / but i guess i know you now // it looks as if i've stumbled right into the palm of your hand // hey, you / hey, mr. knock on my door / i'm sorry that I've been emotions galore / am i crazy for wanting a little bit more? / a little more of you” georgia about sunil. she needs their guidance and wishes he’d been there for her earlier.

stuck in california - rightfield

a song about feeling alone and alienated by everyone and everything around you, and waiting for your “stars to align”, which fits georgia if you ask me

seven - taylor swift

georgiapip song !!!!!! it’s also about how alienating it can be to grow up and lose your childhood innocence, and i have a lot of thoughts about a very specific brand of growing pains that come with being aspec, but that’s a topic for another day

te amo - rihanna

this is a song about having someone be romantically in love with you and the heartbreak that comes from not being able to reciprocate those feelings --> georgia about jason

love love love - of monsters and men

same as te amo. it hits especially hard when you do love the other person so fucking much

ceiling won’t break - finish ticket

this song gives me georgia’s emotional turmoil vibes, also the line “i see no lights ‘cause the lights weren’t aimed at me” can be interpreted in a “cupid’s arrows didn’t hit georgia” way if you get what i mean

lack of emotion - skott

once again we are dealing with themes of not being able to feel the emotions that you “““““should”““““ feel for someone

let me go - hailee steinfeld

another song about georgia and jason’s (romantic) relationship and how it was doomed to fail from the beginning so she hopes he can let her go

i’m so tired - lauv, troye sivan

i’m just thinking about that line in loveless where georgia resentfully realises how many songs are about romantic love. she’s just so tired

crush culture - conan gray

and another song about being resentful of our romance-obsessed society, which georgia certainly is plenty of times throughout the book

home - ella eyre

christmas break time babey !!!! georgia has reached her low point and she’s going home

i love my car - belle & sebastain

“I pressed a cold hand against my car, which was as far up the drive of our house as it could get. I’d missed my car.” - loveless by alice oseman, celebrating all kinds of love since 2020

i’ve never written a song about a boy - eva westphal

this was actually recommended to me by @michaelholdenn for this playlist ! a song about the liberation that comes with not having to force attraction anymore

this is home - cavetown

i think months ago some ask told alice that this is a loveless song and i agree

why can’t we be friends - jordy searcy

this is about georgia’s strained relationship with pip and jason after the bailey ball and how she wishes they could just be friends again, the way they were all throughout their childhood

chiquitita - abba

okay fuckers THIS is literally the LOVELIEST song about friendship and wanting to be there for your loved ones and i’m sure georgia relates

open up - matt simons

“you’re hard to talk to with that wall around you” vs. “rooney had a solid brick wall round some part of her that nobody was allowed to know.” basically, georgia wants rooney to open up to her

just fucking let me love you - lowen

okay, yes, this song is very gay, but i think it can be applied to georgiarooney too ! the frustration this song expresses of wanting to shake someone and scream at them to just fucking let you love them is definitely shown in loveless when it comes to those two

less than i do - the band camino

georgia about pip. she hopes that pip will forgive her eventually. i mean look at the line “i still have your denim jacket” in the song - georgia still has pip’s jacket too, it’s perfect !!!

friends will be friends - queen

if loveless taught us anything it’s that friends sure fuckin will be friends

stick with me - olly murs

“we all get lonely / trying to find a place where we should be / trying to find someone to set us free / there are times a friend is all you need” you know when alice said that every character in the book feels “loveless” in some way at one point or another, but they all learn the value and importance of platonic love? yeah.

your song - moulin rouge

“and then, with three accompanists, i stood on a boat on the river wear and sang ‘your song’ - the version specifically from moulin rouge - to pip quintana, who didn’t yet know me as well as i wished she did, but despite that, was one of my favourite people i had ever met.”

wherever i live - alessia cara

you know the scene after georgia leaves pip and rooney to their first kiss? yeah, this song really reflects that mindset of half loneliness, half acceptance to me. listen to it.

take time - honest men

accepting your identity takes time ! even by the end of loveless there’s still days when georgia wishes she wasn’t aroace and the book presents this in an amazing and properly nuanced way !

die alone - finneas

"you asked me, ‘do you wanna die alone / or watch it all burn down together?’ / i said i’d rather try to hold on to you forever” this song is very much georgiarooney - finding each other in their darkest of days and watching everything they thought they knew (amatonormativity) burn down. together.

no lover - jetty bones

the next few songs are basically just one aro anthem after the next. this is another recommendation from @michaelholdenn - “maybe i don’t need a lover, i just need the friend”

solo - carly rae jepsen

highjacked from @kindaorangey’s loveless playlist. amazing anthem about how it’s okay to be single and how romantic love isn’t as fulfilling as society makes it out to be anyway

trust my lonely - alessia cara

i think in georgia’s case this song can be interpreted as her learning to finally let go of her pre-conceived notions of what love is and what she should want, her learning to “trust her lonely”, though lonely here just means romance-less

love is a town - josh gilligan

“if [romantic] love is a town then i’m passing through" yeah, romance is not for georgia and she’s starting to accept that.

new romantics - taylor swift

the loveless gang is the new romantics !!! they’re redefining love and romance !!!

team - lorde

“and everyone's competing for a love they won't receive / 'cause what this palace wants is release” anyway, let’s go found family song

wild things - alessia cara

now, i don’t know if alessia cara is queer but I DARE YOU to look at the lyrics of wild things and not tell me that this is the ULTIMATE queer anthem about found family and saying fuck you to respectability politics. i DARE you. anyway, loveless is also about found family and saying fuck you to respectability politics so it’s very fitting

never been in love - will jay

full circle babey !!!!! this is THE aro anthem so obviously i had to add it and comparing the “never been in love / and it’s all good” to the “never been in love / and i fucking hate that i couldn’t make it past a crush” message from the first song we can really reflect georgia’s journey of self-acceptance in loveless which i love a lot

[plounce]

my Concepts for aj2

so these are my thoughts and ideas about the game that would follow aa4 in a timeline where we got a coherent apollo trilogy rather than aa5 and aa6. as such, i am discarding aa5 and aa6′s apollo backstories because i find them incoherent as an arc and only slapped onto him for the plots of the games. etc etc. theorizing on squandered potential is me-bait. trucy and klavier get to have THEIR place in the narrative as important characters!! (sorry athena. you will get your own trilogy with good writing and a better design in this timeline too)

this is very stream of consciousness and while i think it’s fairly coherent it is also not chronologically organized as i build on ideas. i am genuinely sorry if the read more doesn’t work on mobile because this thing is stupid long.

containing:

apollo, trucy, and klavier being a firm Trio and getting character development and growing closer :)

themes about found family, letting yourself love/be loved, performance and persona, love giving you strength to do good, you being the one to determine your identity

exploration of the trio’s backstories and the development of their skills

prosecutor franziska chipping away at the corruption within the legal system

klavier being the assistant for a case

kristoph continuing to be a corrupt bastard

buildup to the sibling reveal & canon klapollo in the conclusion of the trilogy

- apollo is the main character

- phoenix is absent for like the entire game besides maybe a couple tiny flashbacks, later revealed to be working with edgeworth on anti-corruption stuff (which is also tied to kristoph & kristoph’s ties within the legal system, “old boys club” etc)

- trucy is assistant for first half of the game

- klavier is assistant for second half of the game. his hair is in a little bun or ponytail :) no drill hair for THIS individual person

- klavier is prosecutor for trucy assistant cases. in the 3rd case klavier was supposed to prosecute against apollo but things keep getting fishier and fishier and things keep reminding them of kristoph. klavier is ordered off the case from on high. mysterious replacement. klavier is too invested in seeing truth & justice come to light so he helps apollo

- franziska prosecutes cases 3 & 4. she has short hair and it’s super sexy and hot.

- kristoph set things up so that klavier is implicated in things. dig into how klavier and apollo feel unable to escape kristoph’s influence - “he’s too foundational”

- 4th case klavier is on trial. oh maybe 3 isn’t about kristoph but it’s just background stuff about the rampup to the 4th case - klavier is put on probation while things are investigated but he doesn’t know WHY, but he’s still committed to his ideals

- trucy is pursuing her magic career, klavier still loves music - has been releasing solo stuff maybe, just some EPs for free/charity, but isn’t touring. focusing on law

- case 4 has a family friend (NOT A WOMAN FOR THE LOVE OF GOD... A MALE DAMSEL PLEASE) get accidentally poisoned through something klavier gave them. that’s the trial itself. kristoph was the source. klavier is arrested. it’s more complicated that this but it gets to this point. day 2 of the trial is when klavier is implicated and he gets yanked into cuffs from the defense bench

- one of case 4′s pillars is a memory from the gavin brothers’ childhood. discuss how kristoph was as a child. klavier has been realizing how... odd certain things were, and trying to pass it off as like “haha yeah kristoph would dissect dead birds and convince our parents that every mess was my fault. i guess that makes sense considering how he ended up haha? I Don’t Feel Strongly About This I Just Think It’s Funny :)”

- apollo’s perceive abilities expanding to be able to perceive general emotional states as well - along with learning to practice more empathy, being considerate. No Klavier And Trucy, You Are Not Fine. this is kind of like athena’s thing actually huh

- trucy, meanwhile, is learning to be more like. emotionally... independent? no. emotionally... self-caring. both independent in that she’s a young adult and also caring in that she is trying not to force herself to take care of everyone all the time and show her less pretty emotions to apollo. take care of herself

- case 1 has to do with something happening at trucy’s show/her career/her school etc. she’s still a real person etc. trucy’s friends mostly being adults, her feeling isolated at school. nah wait this is a slightly absurd world she’s not overly weird for her classmates necessarily. yeah ok it’s about magic

- case 2 has to do with klavier being a rockstar, the pressure of celebrity and public fascination with his persona. stalker fans, music industry, talk shows, etc. someone trying to convince him to come back to music. klavier has to arrest someone he’s fond of again. no big stadium performance in this game

- the trio all dealing with themes of hiding and trying not to feel “bad” emotions: apollo going “im fine” and suppressing his problems & just trying to do his job so he can cope with how overwhelmed & stressed he feels constantly etc etc + trucy hiding the secrets of her magic which is sort of representative of her hiding a lot of her sad/”ugly” feelings because she thinks she needs to because she thinks phoenix depends on her being cheerful all the time + klavier dealing with having a public persona and the pressures of being Himself, trying to be the person others see him as/want him to be, who is klavier when he is not performing? who are all of them when they are not performing? who are they performing for?

- yes i am a “woman” yes i am obsessed with the idea of performance

- trio all dealing with/feeling lonely wrt family: apollo learning more about jove (possibly during the music industry case - someone knew his dad, who refused a big contract), who he was & one of the cases involving someone from his past in the foster system - maybe it’s even clay! - but in general feeling very disconnected from “family” in general esp compared to trucy&klavier’s family troubles being so immediate and raw for them + trucy feeling lonely and kind of abandoned as phoenix is increasingly gone in this game and seeming very distant from her, similar to how zak abandoned her, and also the pains of growing up + klavier’s parents either are dead or are somewhat estranged after he got kristoph imprisoned, klavier feeling very lonely in general after his pursuit of truth&justice has snipped many of his connections from him

- yes i am gay yes i am obsessed with found family

- franziska having a moment of “i get how it is and it sucks” with klavier about Complicated Feelings About Family

- she eventually does realize during case 4 that klavier is guilty but has to hide it in order to push one of kristoph’s allies out into the open. sorry kid uh... what do you like. i will buy you. an ice cream? or something. look do you want a gift card i’ll buy you a gift card

- kristoph’s lawyer shows up near the start of the game to give things to apollo which he is deeply suspicious of but ema tests them and they come up clean. guy shows up here and there throughout the game. maybe tries to bribe apollo or something. apollo gets invited to a Fancy Lunch because he’s the one that bested kristoph gavin and that shows Promise. in a sense. or something. apollo being manipulated by people who refused to hire him when he got kristoph convicted etc

- themes about being young in a world full of secrets and webs of alliance that you feel barred from because you have ideals and won’t compromise them and also either come from nothing or burned all your bridges. just aa protag things <3

- oh maybe there’s a new judge who is also In On Nefarious Plots

- catching these people doesn’t fix everything but - it’s something. they got a couple shitheads

- trucy continues developing her gramarye abilities. more emotional depth. more exploration on complex feelings wrt phoenix and her childhood and her adolescence and how she’s fairly well-adjusted as one can be but also... the shit still hits yk... she’s like 16 years old so she’s maturing

- ema is there. she and apollo get along a bit better. asks after phoenix. provides evidence against klavier, and then evidence for.

- followup on apollo-edgeworth klavier-phoenix parallels - who is the one bringing them further into the light, chaser/chased, the one who wants more/the one who pushes away, etc etc

- follow through on implied gramarye mafia connections

- klavier isn’t super in the first case besides the courtroom and maybe one appearance, but he is like. worried about trucy if there is cause to be worried about her. set up their dynamic beyond trucy just liking the gavinners

- trucy&apollo and klavier&kristoph compares&contrast

- franziska is(/appears to be) very doubting/dismissive of apollo’s belief in klavier bc it’s like... are you pursuing the truth? or trying to shield your friend?

- apollo does end up almost very close believing klavier was in kahoots with kristoph/kristoph’s friends because it just looks. really bad. like it genuinely looks VERY BAD. and he’s like “i have to find truth like prosecutor von karma said”. yknow how with a lot of aa cases it starts out “oh no it looks open and shut” and then is like “NO WAY THEY COULD HAVE DONE IT... BUT HUH”. this one is reverse. and then straightens back out again. dig the hole then climb back out

- yeah the theme is like. “are you trying to find truth or do you want to protect your loved ones. what is your duty as a person, your job or your loved ones.” this carries through on klavier’s thread from aa4 where he has to work against his loved ones. meanwhile apollo, who is a bit more cool-tempered irritable grump, is the one going “oh god, am i biased towards my friends?” so it sort of flips. what kind of stories will you weave to clear your friends of blame? kristoph’s boys club.

- echo back to “evidence is everything” - this line of thinking (in a certain way) is what saves klavier when kristoph is trying to punish him for his betrayal

- since phoenix is away, the gramarye siblings aren’t revealed yet. but more info is dropped to compensate - stuff about jove and apollo’s childhood in the foster system and how that’s shaped him into someone who keeps people at arm’s length to keep himself safe; trucy and apollo getting closer despite that, trucy busting down those barriers because she needs his support and he’s like “oh my god i have to support her.” older sibling stuff.

- maybe the trucy case involves like. a mafia guy trying to collect on debts or smth and tries to ruin trucy, and threatens apollo. there’s a hint that is very obvious to the audience but is like “wow apollo he thought you were my brother!” like the mafia guy calls apollo “the other child” and apollo is like “hey, i’m 24!” which is humorous but also the audience is like Oh My God I Know What That Means

- there isn’t a deliberate withholding of information from phoenix - he literally is not there to withhold it. but there is still tension and stakes and weight to their relation - apollo keenly feeling his absence of family and trucy feeling sort of abandoned by phoenix

- phoenix is like “ok trucy you’re almost an adult so i’m trusting you to stay safe and responsible while i’m away. apollo will technically be in charge but i’m still trusting you” and privately to apollo is like “If Anything Bad Happens To Her. Your Head Is On The Line.” so it is just them making it on their own

- klavier drops the line “watching you two is like what kristoph and i should have had” and then there’s a couple “...” dialogue boxes as the audience is like I KNOW WHAT HE MEANS and then apollo is like “... are you for real comparing me to kristoph.” haha funny but also THERE IT IS

- very carefully walked tightrope. acknowledged enough that there is still tension/suspense around it but not too much as to be slightly infuriating

- before the last case trucy gets mad at apollo for something - trucy is allowed by the narrative to be angry for real. stand up for herself. trucy and apollo come back together to defend klavier. they see each other in the detention center when theyre still mad at each other - trucy was visiting klavier (he wasn’t there for the fight). “you made fraulein trucy very mad, hm?” then during the trial trucy busts in dramatically with important help when things look very bad for klavier

- aj3 has emotional revelations/high points of the trio - siblings reveal and klapollo canon. aj2 is a lot of building of these connections and building suspense and tension. more more more of these relationships before they emerge fully formed in aj3

- the last trial echoes the “im the only one who can save prosecutor gavin” or whatever gay thing apollo says in the last trial of aa4 because he literally is. just a lot of hinting and them getting along. case 3 is very important because that’s when it’s just them and it’s “oh! we work well together! we’re complementary!”

- implement the dual investigation mechanic from dgs so it does feel collaborative

- just build on the fact that klavier is the first friendly, helpful, cooperative prosecutor. he wants to help you. make that a very positive, very important feeling while still making it extremely enjoyable

- resolves in “you can have truth AND the ones you love”. or smth like that but more nuanced. it’s very inspirational and sentimental etc

- you get to meet vongole and it’s a Pet The Dog moment for klavier. look! how nice he is. he truly loves this insanely sweet and lovable dog. trucy is enamored with vongole as well. “it’s strange that she was kristoph’s dog, hm? with how affectionate she is.” “well, i guess being owned by kristoph doesn’t means she’s an equally bad dog ... ER i mean--” “hm, you always struck me as a cat person, herr forehead?” “uh - well yeah, you’re right. but... that doesn’t mean i don’t think vongole is a pretty great dog.” IMPLICATIONS. SUBTEXT. TASTE IT IN THE AIR

- oh there’s definitely a moment in case 2 when you get to examine klavier’s apartment and you can look at a couple albums and for a gavinners album apollo is like “ugh” but then you get one of his solo eps and apollo is like “trucy made me listen to this. it... was okay. not as bad as the gavinners stuff. sounds more honest. or something like that.”

- oh also when you examine the guitar klavier offers to teach apollo some basics. hee hee (BUT ALSO... JOVE!!)

- maybe for case 2 The Industry Suits want klavier to stop releasing his eps for free/total charity so it’s a whole coordinated scheme. his manager, a devoted fan who hates to see him going his own way and being happier for it, etc. “we want you to be the person you were. the one we could possess.” be more like gavinners klavier instead of honest relaxed current klavier. be who we want you to be so we can make you dance like a puppet. music industry kristoph parallels.

- “i’m sick and tired of being a plaything for other people!” >:( face moments

- a fan broke into his house and defaced the solo stuff etc. >:( face.

- who determines who “you” are? what role do your loved ones have in your life? those who truly love you can save you and make you better. loving and being loved sincerely and genuinely and truly have positive effects on your life. letting people love you and letting yourself love them is good.

- ugh but this kind of contrasts with the “the old boys club is controlling and using/shaping the institution of law to amass wealth and power for themselves while throwing others under the bus.” well actually wait

- lunch with apollo = they don’t actually care about each other, would throw each other under the bus for their own benefit

- contrast between sacrificing the weak to protect the strong and protecting the weak to depower the evil strong

- love and bonds can motivate/enable you to chip away at the system and can help you make a difference. les mis etc etc etc

- the old boys club are all putting up fronts of appearing strong and tough and above everything and in control. real love and friendship let you show vulnerability and weakness and help you & your bond come out stronger for it. (tumblr voice) the mortifying ordeal

- additional stakes of “if you are found aiding this criminal and hiding evidence etc etc we will disbar you” or smth. stakes for sticking with klavier, for winning the trial, for demonstrating care. franziska is kind of like “... apologies. but you had nothing to worry about so don’t worry about it.” 

- klavier and apollo damned by association with kristoph, especially as a kristoph scheme was just found to happen, and it depended on kristoph being in jail, so maybe they were the ones to enable that part of the plan... it’s a long con...

- it feels like there should be another legal reform here to make aa4′s jury implementation but maybe this one is more about how reform is often very gradual and like chipping away at a mountain

- in aj3 the death penalty gets reformed. (tension there about kristoph being on death row and this game piles on a lot more GOD KRISTOPH SUCKS but then it’s like. no. we have to fight for True Justice and the legal system is extremely imperfect (how many of our clients narrowly avoided a wrongful guilty verdict!) so we have to prioritize protection over punishment)

- “it’s like chopping heads off the hydra. it feels like we’ll never actually change anything.” “yes, but hercules didn’t defeat it by himself. he had a partner that burned the stumps after he sliced off the heads. ... one person to hold the sword, one person to hold the torch.” NARUMITSU KLAPOLLO PARALLELS. HI

- okay i had some really good discussions on twitter w @henriettamarias about this and here’s a couple more things

- trucy’s case involves her inheriting the gramarye secrets and the legacy. the weight of tradition and the burden of what has happened in her family. trucy’s estranged grandmother shows up - it’s kind of similar to the feys kind of. the grandmother is a complex maternal figure who doesn’t know trucy and trucy doesn’t know her and it’s sort of the idea of... even if your “new” family is related by blood, you still have to choose them. and trucy’s like !!! because she’s openhearted but the grandmother disappears - doesn’t choose trucy. it’s not a Villainous Action it’s just... it’s complicated. maybe it’s to protect trucy or something. it wasn’t done to hurt trucy is what i’m getting at, but it still hurts

- one of the music industry people in klavier’s case is a gavin uncle/aunt/cousin who is pressuring him to go back to being an Extremely Profitable Rockstar. and klavier has to deal with more disappointment from a family that values extreme success and is sort of cold (this contrasts with the warmth of the WAA found family). they liked klavier when he was very successful and famous on two fronts but now he’s opened the door and invited in shame on their family’s name so everyone’s kind of mad at him. trucy and apollo get to be really defensive of him

- apollo’s case is one i’m still thinking on what it’ll be about because i’m deeply uninterested in his aa5+aa6 backstories but there’s not A Concept to go deeper into like trucy magic and klavier music... it does involve his past from being the foster system. i think maybe there’s a teen who he was kind of the older brother of for a while before the kid got adopted who contacts him for help defending himself.

- while trucy and klavier’s stories are about rejection from their blood family, apollo’s is about warmth with a boy who he met and made a familial bond with

- at the end of this case there’s some piece of evidence that mentions kristoph and this is never resolved within that case but it sort of leads into the next kristoph-focused case

- trucy doesn’t get angry at apollo over being like jealous there’s something else that happens in this case... it doesn’t end super satisfyingly and tidily wrapped up in a neat bow. there are a lot of lingering questions and it makes everyone uneasy

- in case 3 apollo gets injured and is feeling really defensive and kind of scared and trucy is upset with him for putting himself in harm’s way to save her and they have a fight and they’re both kind of hiding their true feelings with anger to cover up how scared they were (gramarye secrets) and it just. boils over. klavier tries to mediate but it’s... a lot. they both say some things they don’t mean. :(

- oh my god. the person who got poisoned in case 4 was apollo’s foster brother from case 3. and it HURTS because we’ve spent a whole case getting to know him and working so hard to save him from a guilty verdict and it’s like :D yay he’s ok! and then he just. dies. and it’s so fucking sad

- he got poisoned because kristoph looked through papers and found that him and apollo were close so he’s like “oh i can use that ^_^” because he’s a bastard. but klavier was the one in constant contact with him recently so it’s like UH OH! UH OH! plus other aa level complications etc

- the tightrope of trucy being mad at apollo and the tragedy of apollo’s foster brother dying is one that will have to be very carefully walked bc we don’t want trucy to look like an asshole because above all she does love apollo

- i guess it’s also apollo pushing her away because I’M FINE. STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME CONFRONT MY TRAUMA. IF I THINK ABOUT MY PROBLEMS I WILL GO INSANE. yeah that works

- OH and also she’s mad at him for not telling them about the lunch with kristoph’s lawyer friends. klavier is kind of mad about that too so apollo is like STOP GANGING UP ON ME

- so the setup of case 4 is: day 1: apollo and klavier investigating, in court klavier is implicated and is put in detention, day 2: apollo investigating by himself and missing his friends :(, franziska being like “where is your sister” and apollo being like “ok first she’s not my sister. second IM FINE I CAN BE ALONE, I CAN’T TRUST ANYBODY ANYWAY” and franziska is like “... yeah being betrayed sucks, i get it, but like. are you sure about that. fine whatever you idiot be a fool”, but then in court trucy busts in at a dramatic moment and narrowly saves klavier from getting a guilty verdict, day 3: trucy and apollo investigating and Saving The Day!!!!!

- for franziska in case 4 there’s this tension between her belief that klavier is guilty (because shit looks BAD and also kristoph sort of sent shockwaves through things etc) and franziska being older (she has short hair and it’s hot) and more emotionally mature and being like “baby lawyer. it’s okay to chill. it’s fine. you’ll be okay”. but also being extremely wary and hating the corruption and collusion within the law community because MvF dealt with a lot of that and she will be BETTER than that, she has to work hard to erase the harm that her father did. she’s kind of a superhero in terms of tackling a lot of corrupt-lawyer/cop cases - it’s her specialty now. god she is hot

- aw in case 4 ema is like. kind of reluctant to help implicate klavier. because while she thinks he’s annoying she doesn’t think he’s a bad guy. she feels really conflicted :( like she blusters to cover it up but she does say to apollo at one point “hey... you better do your job right. don’t slack. defend your client.” awww she care him

- kristoph gets brought out from prison as a witness in case 4. this really negatively affects klavier (and apollo too kind of but less so), but the strength of Found Family helps him be strong :) yay

- there’s mention made of kristoph having Secrets, but since apollo doesn’t have a magatama and phoenix isn’t there, the black psyche-locks aren’t explored. it gets revealed in aj3

- apollo does have a conundrum similar to the aa5 stuff where his perceive ability is going haywire at klavier’s entire emotional state because BOY is it screwy (suppressed memories from childhood??) so he just has to rely on plain old logic

- (cw animal death) god what if one of those childhood memories is kristoph poisoning klavier’s pet - experimenting, doing trials. klavier realizes that during the trial. jesus christ. evil bastard kristoph i hate his guts. at least klavier gets to go home and pet vongole so so much

- OH on a happier note we get to meet mikeko... mikeko loves trucy and klavier so much. it’s like a big gooey hint that LOOK APOLLO LOVES THESE PEOPLE - HIS CAT IS PURRING AND CUDDLING ALL OVER THEM :) Express Your Feelings, Apollo

- i think for aj3 it’s apollo & co having their own schemes and plans sort of. bc in this setup, klavier and apollo (and trucy too) are being yanked around by the machinations and plots of the older generation like in aa4. i think in aj3 is when they finally get a leg up and have control over things for once. good for them! good for them

- oh also in aj3, it’s revealed that thalassa has been held hostage by some bad guys, which is why she didn’t come back after some time away to figure herself out to tell them. and then apollo and trucy get to know they’re siblings :)

- okay that’s it. maybe i’ll add more if i think of more. hope u enjoyed :~)

[sie-werden-nie-vergessen]

“Ruth and Ephraim as a couple” headcanons/AU, ft “Sarah in Boston”

@shapeshiftersandfire, so here it is. I finished way earlier than I anticipated, but I just started typing and here it is!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muFFeiBUffQ (this song is required listening when reading these headcanons. It IS Ephraim and Ruth’s theme song. I recommend starting it at 3:14 because that point of the song is the section that really gives me Ruth and Ephraim vibes) 

First off, there is SO much covert flirting. SO, SO MUCH FLIRTING.

Ephraim is definitely having an identity crisis on the way home after the card game.

He gets home and Deodat asks him how the party went and he just kind of stands there like an oaf.

“It went fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“No Yes”

“...okay”

Deodat doesn’t believe him but he assumes that maybe Ephraim was just rejected by a date or something. Little does he know…..

“Fire Meet Gasoline” is a very good analogy to their relationship.

Because not only would it be passionate

But their relationship would probably also develop very quickly

They wouldn’t rush things, per se, but the “crush” phase is definitely very short for them

They’re both very outspoken and confident, so they very quickly open up about their feelings rather than beating around the bush.

They’re both very passionate people in terms of personality, and even when Ephraim is open-minded enough to fall for Ruth, they still inevitably clash with their opinions

They don’t fight but they definitely debate.

But in a healthy way. The debates can get heated but not in a hostile way. They’re just both very opinionated and they get very passionate about their opinions and their different thought processes.

 “I know I’m right!” “Yeah well I know that I”M right!” “Well I think I’m right because xyz” “Well my reasons are abc” “...that’s a good point. But I’m still right ;)”

So it probably looks like arguing to some people, but they both know that it’s all in good humor so neither Ephraim or Ruth are actually hurt by it or anything

They actually think it’s a good source of entertainment.

They once got into a heated debate about the correct color of socks in the middle of the new Mill Valley department store just to see the reactions of the cashiers

The aforementioned cashiers were horrified

Ephraim was arguing in favor of brown socks, and Ruth in favor of gray.

They ended up buying both colors.

Ruth now buys him brown and gray socks for a gag gift every Christmas (were gag gifts a thing in 1898? No clue, but I like the idea so I’m running with it and not researching something for once).

Ephraim keeps her a secret for a long time, for obvious reasons.

Ruth doesn’t mind this because she understands his reasoning behind it. 

She takes it as an opportunity to introduce him to her family and friends.

Ephraim gets along great with her brother Charles, and almost immediately the “future brother in law” jokes start.

Ruth is surprisingly embarrassed by this.

Ephraim teases her for days about that fact.

“Finally! I finally found something that embarrasses you!”

Ephraim goes to her performances and cheers her on (he always brings a bouquet too)

He sits in the front row right at the bottom of the stage and claps the loudest when she comes on stage.

Ruth is big into theatrics and has an entire setup of smoke cannons and mood lighting that announce her entrance.

She steps into this cloud of smoke and raises her arms dramatically and announces herself

Ruth loves to wear the color red because it looks so striking against her pale skin, but she secretly loves lighter shades of blue even more (they just don’t give off very strong “mystical” vibes, so she sticks to dark reds when she’s in the spotlight)

She works as a fortune teller and does card tricks as well

She loves to hear the ridiculous rumors and urban legends surrounding the “mystical powers” of albinos and then she incorporates that into her routine

“ALBINOS CAN READ MINDS” okay, well now she does mind reading as a new trick

In reality she’s just a very analytical person so it’s easy for her to pick up on small body language or vocal cues

Ephraim always asks her to tell him her fortune and it inevitably turns into some sappy “well I think you’ll end up marrying an amazing circus performer who just so happens to also be the most beautiful woman in Pennsylvania” thing

Ephraim definitely agrees with her “fortune”

He tells her about Sarah pretty early on in the relationship. He doesn’t want to hide anything from her.

He isn’t sure how she’ll take it, especially considering the fact that he was complacent in Sarah’s abuse for years until he really got out into the world and realized that everything he “knew” about albinism was wrong.

Ruth is definitely shocked but she assures him that he’s not some sort of monster, because he realized that what his parents trained him to think was wrong and he was able to grow from that.

One day when the rest of the family is out, Ephraim sneaks Ruth into the mansion (with the help of Sylvie and Lou Lou, of course) and she goes down to the cellar to meet Sarah.

Sarah is absolutely floored that there are others like her.

Of course she knew, because Ephraim told her when he returned from college and made amends, but when she sees it infront of her eyes it’s still a shock.

Ruth and Sarah hit it off instantly, of course.

Ruth promises to take Sarah to see a circus someday

Sarah can’t wait to see the elephants.

A few days after the secret meeting, Ephraim decides to tell his family about Ruth.

He tells Harold, thinking that maybe Harold would understand

But Harold just rats him out to Deodat and Delanie

They’re furious, of course

They don’t tell Gertrude because they claim that it would give her a heart attack

And tbh, it might

Gertrude figures it out anyways from the deranged yelling that comes from downstairs

“After all we’ve done to hide Sarah, and now you do THIS?!!”

“Mother, there’s nothing wrong with her.”

“She’s a circus freak!”

“By choice. She enjoys working in sideshows. That doesn’t make her a bad person.”

“Are you sure she isn’t just trying to mooch off of OUR money?!”

“She’s very wealthy, Mother. She works because she enjoys it.”

Deodat has more or less the same reaction.

Harold just can’t believe that Ephraim would “betray” the family in that way.

Ephraim tells Ruth the next day, and they decide to take Sarah away and leave for Boston.

Charles helps with the legal side of things, and pulls a few strings with his lawyer friends in Pennsylvania to have Sarah legally emancipated from her parents.

The trio moves to Boston and temporarily lives with Charles and his wife Louisa.

Louisa is smitten with Sarah from the start and insists on baking her ridiculous amounts of gingerbread.

(For no reason, really, but Louisa just has a thing for gingerbread. Sarah doesn’t complain)

Sarah gains quite a lot of weight in those first few months, and for the first time in her life she weighs a healthy amount. 

Ruth takes her clothes shopping often, and she insists on buying Sarah the nicest and newest fashions (even though she grows out of them so quickly now. It’s as if 18 years of growing have finally caught up with her at once).

Sarah hugs Ephraim for the first time after she and Ruth return from their first major shopping trip. Ephraim almost cries, and Ruth grins so hard that her face hurts. 

Ephraim wasn’t sure if Sarah could ever forgive him, but that was proof enough for him.

Ruth gives Sarah her first diamond necklace. It’s the one that Ruth wore the day she met Sarah. Sarah had said that it was the prettiest thing that she had ever seen, and Ruth saved it for her until they reached Boston. It was an informal adoption gift, really.

Ephraim and Ruth eventually buy a nice brownstone in Boston. It’s a few streets away from Charles and Louisa’s home, and there’s a large park across the street.

Sarah loves to sit in the park and watch the swans and ducks on the pond.

Sometimes Ruth and Ephraim go with her, but a lot of the time they let her go alone. They know that she’s been through a lot, and that sometimes she needs time alone to process everything. 

Sometimes she comes back with tears in her eyes, but no one mentions it. Ruth brings her a cup of tea or a piece of gingerbread (Louisa is always sending over fresh gingerbread) and offers her a shoulder to cry on, if she needs it.

Ruth takes Sarah to meet her fellow albino circus performers. For once in her life, Sarah feels truly accepted and understood when she stands in a room surrounded by people like her.

There are so many children in the room, and they’re all so loved by their family members, regardless of their albinism. It makes Sarah sad at first, but she’s also happy to see that they were raised in loving households instead of abusive and hateful ones.

For their first Christmas together in Boston, Ephraim buys Sarah a Kodak No. 2 Bullseye Camera. When the first Kodak Brownie camera is released a few years later in 1900, he buys her one of those as well.

He tells her that she can use it to document her new life in Boston.

The first picture she takes is a picture of a sleeping Ephraim.

He’s sitting in an armchair next to the Christmas tree, surrounded by wrapping paper and plates of half finished cookies.

Once the picture is developed, she puts it in her new photo album that Charles and Louisa gave to her.

When Ephraim woke up, Sarah asked to take a picture with him. 

Of course he obliged.

She keeps that one in a frame by her bedside.

Sarah has a whole pile of her “treasures” that she keeps beside her bed, but that picture is at the center of it all. 

Ephraim notices it one time when he’s helping Ruth collect the laundry, and it touches him more than he can say.

For her gift, Ruth arranges for Sarah to take some writing classes at the local women’s college.

Sarah is thrilled. She starts to write stories other than horror.

She still loves scary stories, but she finds a new love for children’s stories and romance novels.

Little Women is her favorite (Ruth is delighted! It was her favorite book too!)

In 1900 Ruth and Ephraim have a son. They name him Eli, in reference to Sarah’s middle name (Elizabeth).

Sarah is the proudest aunt you’ve ever seen. 

Ephraim and Ruth go on to have more children, but Sarah has a special bond with little Eli. He is the first baby that she ever held.

The odd little family on Pearl Street is probably the happiest family you’ll ever see.

Sarah eventually marries the son of one of Ruth’s circus colleagues. 

His name is Thomas, and he’s a quiet man.

He loves birds too, just like Sarah. 

He and Sarah go bird watching often.

They go on to have a large family. 2 out of the 5 children have albinism, but they love all of their children the same.

They live a long life.

Neither Ephraim, Ruth, or Sarah ever return to Mill Valley. They’re more than happy to let the past remain in the past.

Bonus: Harold In Boston Headcanons/AU

Once Ephraim does reach out to Harold, and he’s surprised to learn that Harold has also distanced himself from their parents.

Gertrude died in 1899, and shortly after that Harold’s fiancée Violet died of tuberculosis. With his ties to Mill Valley significantly loosened, Harold took an extended business trip to Philadelphia where he eventually opened his own publishing company. After the mercury scandal at the mill, Deodat and Delanie are essentially ruined and Harold is free to pursue his own interests independent of the mill.

He goes to visit Ephraim in 1900 to congratulate him on the birth of his son. 

It’s tense at first, when he see’s Sarah. He isn’t sure how she’ll react to him.

She’s wearing a white lace dress with small puffs at the sleeves, and pale blue ribbons at the cuffs and waist of the skirt.

Her hair is in a soft gibson girl-esque style, and Harold realizes that it’s the first time he’s ever seen her in anything other than the old gown she always wore back in Pennsylvania.

“Hello Sarah”

“Hello Harold”

He isn’t sure what to do at first, but Ruth quickly introduces herself to abate the awkward silence.

He’s never met Ruth, but he quickly understands why Ephraim likes her so much.

After he meets the baby and pleasantries are exchanged, he wanders off into one of the upstairs rooms of the home.

(Sarah left the room once Ruth brought out the baby. She loves Eli, but she feels awkward being everyone all at once, as if she’s intruding on something she isn’t, of course).

He accidentally goes into Sarah’s room, only to find her at her desk writing.

Her room is nothing like the dark basement she used to call home, and Harold is thankful for that.

“So, you still write?”

Sarah jumps in her chair a little, before suddenly whipping around. She’s still not good with loud or sudden noises, even after 3 years of safety.

Harold cringes when she jumps. He hates that he still scares her.

When she composes herself, she smiles a small smile. “Yes, I still write.”

Harold asks what she writes about these days, and she tells him that she writes children’s stories.

It’s a sad irony, considering the mercury scandal, but Harold doesn’t tell her about that yet.

She had left Mill Valley before the worst of it, and he knows how much she loved those children.

After they talk for a while, Sarah eventually invites him to sit with her.

They sit side by side on her bed and she shows him her notebooks.

He’s surprised by how much she’s grown since he last saw her. She’s a little taller now, and she’s gained a lot of weight. Her face isn’t hollow anymore, and her eyes are bright now. Her hair is shiny and thick, and she truly looks happy.

She only shakes a little when he’s so close to her. Harold still scares her a little, but Ephraim promised her that no one would ever hurt her again.

Sarah trusts Ephraim immensely, so she’s willing to trust Harold too

Still, it’s a little hard for her to have him in such close proximity.

Harold notices her discomfort and moves a few inches away (still close enough to see her notebooks, but far enough that it gives Sarah a safe buffer). Her nerves calm down once she has a “safe zone.”

Harold finally works up the nerve to say something.

“Sarah, I-”

“I know. Ephraim told me.”

“He did?”

“He did”

“Well...that’s...that’s good.”

The next thing that Sarah does shocks Harold to his core.

She reaches out, her hands shaking, and grabs his hand.

“I know that you didn’t mean it - what you did to me -...not really, anyways. I know you’re different now.”

Harold squeezes her hand in return, and she stops shaking.

“Thank you”

Sarah smiles

“Of course”

Ephraim happens to pass Sarah’s bedroom on his way upstairs and nearly dies of shock at the site of them. Harold doesn’t notice Ephraim, but Sarah does.

She bursts out laughing, because Ephraim genuinely looks horrified, shocked, and immensely confused.

“He said that he was sorry!,” she explained in a half yell in Ephraim’s direction.

Ephraim is still in shock, so he doesn’t say anything.

Harold is also in shock, but because of Sarah’s laugh.

The man genuinely didn’t think that it was possible, and yet here she was laughing.

When everyone recovers from their respective shocks, Harold is invited to stay for dinner.

This dinner invitation turns into a long term stay, and eventually Harold moves his business to Boston.

He buys the brownstone next to Ephraim and Ruth’s home.

He remains a bachelor all his life, never having truly recovered from Violet’s death.

Harold definitely earns the title of “World’s Greatest Uncle” in regards to Sarah and Thomas’ children.

By 1980 the neighborhood block is so full of Bellows descendants that it’s unofficially renamed Bellows Square

Ruth and Ephraim’s house becomes a local historic landmark, considering the fact that Ephraim went on to become one of the country’s early geneticists who (humanely) studied genetic disorders and medical conditions.

The house later becomes a museum in the early 90s, having been restored to the same state that it was when they once resided in it.

Sarah’s Kodak No. 2 Bullseye is put on display, but the crowning achievement is her collection of photo albums and notebooks. She went on to become a children’s writer and illustrator, basing many of her books on her experiences in Boston. 

The old Bellows Paper Mill is torn down in 1948 to make room for new housing following the G.I. Bill and the post-war Baby Boom.

None of the surviving Bellows are sad to see it go.

[starryknight09]

Unforeseen dangers ch. 5

Summary:  As Peter recovers from his capture by Ross, a photo of him with Tony and the Avengers leaks and is splashed all across the media. Luckily, no one can figure out who he is and everyone thinks the buzz will die down. However, the public’s interest has been ignited. While Tony worries it’s only a matter of time before Peter’s identity is exposed, Peter isn’t as concerned. Besides, what’s the worst that could happen anyway?

Read on AO3.

________________________________________________________

“Hey rugrat, what have you been up to?” Clint asked as Peter walked into the common room.

“Homework.” He answered and jumped over the back of the couch, landing with his back on the cushions and jostling Clint.  “My brain is dead.” He complained, not caring if he was being melodramatic.  He’d spent all morning and afternoon working on it, and he still had a lot left to do.  Missing almost two weeks of school was something he definitely planned to avoid in the future.

“Rough, huh?” Clint asked with a half grin.

“That’s an understatement.”

“You’ll survive.” Clint patted his shin.

“Yeah I guess.” He sighed.  “I just want to be done with it so I can actually start to enjoy my winter break.”

Clint nodded in understanding before gesturing toward his right thigh.  “How’s the leg?”

“Fine.” He shrugged.  “Pretty much back to normal.”

“Good.  That’s quite the healing factor you have.  If that had happened to me, I would’ve been laid up for weeks.”

“Yeah.  It definitely has its uses.  Although personally, I like it better when I don’t need it at all.”

“I’m sure everyone feels that way.” Clint nodded.  “But we’re all just happy you’re ok now kid.”

“Me too.” Peter tried to smile, but he didn’t know how well he succeeded.  The whole event with Ross had been nothing short of terrifying and thinking about it still left a stale taste in his mouth.

“Hey, and don’t worry about this media thing.  Your dad’s got it covered and we’ve all got your back, you know.”

“I know.” He nodded.  Maybe he should be more worried than he was about his picture being splashed across all the news channels, but he had too many other things on his mind.  He didn’t have the mental space to start worrying about something that hadn’t caused an actual problem yet.  He figured he’d deal with it if it became an issue, but hopefully it wouldn’t.

“Hey it’s the squirt.” Sam announced as he walked out of the elevator and into the room along with Steve, Nat, and Rhodey.  They all had their sweat laden workout gear on.

“Hey guys.” He greeted them with a lazy wave.

“You two hungry?” Steve asked, making his way toward the kitchen.

“You know me, I could always eat.” Clint replied.

“Me too.” Peter agreed.

“I’m starving.” Sam said dramatically as he fell backward into one of the armchairs.

“Ditto.” Rhodey said, sitting on the other empty couch.  Nat hummed in agreement before she slumped down next to him.

“Whatever happened to the no coming in the common room without showering first rule?” Clint complained.

“That sounds like a made up rule.” Nat said tiredly.

“Didn’t you hear us?  We’re starving.” Sam reiterated as if that explained everything.

“You guys reek.” Clint shook his head.

Nat flipped him off.

“We do not.” Sam sniffed one of his arm pits.  “I smell great.”

Rhodey shook his head and turned the TV on.

“What’s for dinner Cap?” Sam asked as Steve walked over.

“Well since it looks like there’s no food in the kitchen, I ordered some pizzas.” Steve answered, sitting in the other empty armchair.

“Mmm, pizza sounds great.” Rhodey said.  He stopped channel surfing and settled on a news station.

“What do you mean there’s no food?” Clint asked.

“Exactly what I said.  The cupboards are bare.”

“Sounds like Stark’s been slacking.” Sam snorted.

“Can you blame him?” Nat quirked a judgmental eyebrow at him.

Peter pretended to be engrossed in the TV so he could ignore the not so subtle looks they all turned toward him.

“I’m sure FRIDAY can handle it.” Clint waved a hand dismissively then directed his eyes to the ceiling.  “Right FRIDAY?”

“Indeed.  I will order the usual shipment to restock the kitchen right away, Katniss.”

“FRIDAY.” Clint groaned in complaint as everyone else grinned or chuckled in amusement.  One of Tony’s favorite things to do was to program FRIDAY to call his teammates by their many nicknames.

“…and in other news, no progress has been made in identifying the boy next to Tony Stark in the photo that has been displayed by media outlets across the world.”

Peter’s attention snapped to the television as the two newscasters on the screen discussed him.  Well, the picture of him.  The photo popped up in the upper right hand corner of the screen.  It was really weird seeing a picture of himself on television even when no one else recognized it as him.

“Maybe we should turn this off.” Steve suggested but Peter shook his head when Rhodey made a move toward the remote.  

“No.  I want to hear what they’re saying.” He said softly.  He’d been avoiding it, but he figured it’d be stupid to try to avoid it forever, and there was no time like the present.

“Tony Stark has remained conspicuously silent on the matter.” The male newscaster said.

“And if that’s not telling, I don’t know what is.” The female newscaster agreed.  “This is the man that couldn’t keep his identity secret as Ironman for more than a day, but this he makes no remark about?”

“And not just him, but Stark Industries and the Avengers are all keeping quiet.  There’s definitely a story to be had here.  The only question is who is going to figure it out first.” The man smiled.

Peter scrunched his face up at that.

“And although there’s still no official word from any of the staff involved in the signing of the Accords amendments, our sources say that the government aide responsible for the leaked photo has been fired.” The woman added.

“Well that’s certainly not surprising,” The man said as he nodded and straightened the stack of papers in front of him, “especially if you consider—”

“FRIDAY off.” Tony’s voice interrupted whatever the man had been about to say.  

Peter craned his head back over the armrest to see his dad standing there with his arms crossed across his chest.  

“Why are we watching this crap?” Tony nodded toward the now blank TV screen.  “There’s really nothing more interesting on?”

Guilty silence met his question.

“It’s not their fault.  I wanted to watch it.” Peter spoke up.  He didn’t want anyone getting in trouble because of him.  “I should know what they’re saying about me.”

“They’re not saying anything about you.” Tony argued, and Peter swallowed hard when his dad turned his displeased expression on him.  “Because they don’t know it’s you.  They’re speculating on some as of yet unnamed person.  And that’s how it’s going to stay until they eventually lose interest and then all this will die out.”

No one argued with him.

“Got it?”

Peter nodded.

“Trust me.  It’s all going to be fine.” Tony said, voice softening as his hand landed in Peter’s hair.

“Ok.” Peter gave him a small smile.

“Ok good.” Tony rounded the couch and gently picked up Peter’s feet to make space so he could sit on the couch before settling them back in his lap.  “So, now that that’s settled, maybe we can watch something of actual substance?”

Rhodey turned the TV back on, but was quick to change the channel, searching for something better.

After a few long seconds of awkward silence, Clint asked with a smirk, “So you got the aide fired huh?”

“Of course.” Tony answered as if it was obvious.

Peter protested in surprise, “Wait.  You got them fired?”

“Don’t worry about it kid.” Tony patted his knee.

“But—”

“What they did was illegal.  They’re lucky all I did was take their job away.  I could’ve done a lot worse.  I wanted to, actually, but Pepper talked me out of it.” Tony said more darkly.

“Better be careful Stark.  For all you know, all they need is this grudge against you to turn into an evil supervillain intent on revenge.” Nat joked, lightening the mood.

Tony snorted.  “That is kind of my MO, huh?”

“I wouldn’t be proud of that.” Nat said dryly.

“Hey, maybe it’s a good thing.  I eventually have to run out of enemies, right?”

“Not at the rate you make them.” Rhodey chimed in.

“Hmm.  That may be true.”

“Definitely true.” Clint nodded.  “I’m one more stupid nickname from FRIDAY away from taking you out myself.”

That made everyone laugh and even Peter quirked a smile.  He still felt bad that someone had lost their job over him, but if releasing that picture had been illegal then it had probably been deserved.  He figured he could live with that.

Tony had been right.  A couple weeks passed and the media buzz finally started to die down as they came no closer to figuring out that he was the kid in the picture.  Everyone around the Tower started to act a little less uptight, which Peter figured could also be because of the holiday season, and not just his picture’s fading notoriety, but either way, it was nice.  

Tony went all out and literally decked the halls with the rest of the team’s help.  Peter had never seen so many Christmas decorations.  He and May usually decorated a tree and put some baubles up around the house but that was the extent of it.  Tony took it to a whole another level.  

He’d bought a ten foot tree and the whole team had spent one morning decking it out in an assortment of ornaments while they listened to Christmas music and drank hot chocolate with candy canes.  The kicker was the addition of everyone’s specially made superhero ornament, including Peter’s Spiderman.  But the tree wasn’t all.  Garland, poinsettias, lights, and Christmas themed decorations adorned every available surface.  It looked like an elf had thrown up in the room, and more often than not, Tony walked around with a Santa hat perched crookedly on his head.  Peter loved Christmas, but it was almost too much even for him.  

Peter didn’t know if this was the usual for Tony or if he was doing it special for him, for their first Christmas together.  The offhanded comments Pepper and Rhodey had made along with some of the other Avengers made Peter suspect it was the latter, and he appreciated it, but he also couldn’t help the melancholy that sometimes threatened to overtake him as he prepared to celebrate his first Christmas without May.  Tony seemed to sense it every time he started to feel particularly down because he’d show up out of nowhere and pull him into some festive activity.  

So far, he’d gone ice skating at a rink Tony had rented out for the afternoon to keep it free from bystanders, he’d made a gingerbread house, he’d gone upstate to go sledding, and he’d decorated Christmas cookies, the activity he was currently attempting.  He and May had never really done the Christmas cookie thing since most of her cookie baking attempts ended up blackened.  The store bought kind had been a Christmas staple in their house ever since Peter could remember.

But Peter had to admit, Steve’s homemade cookies tasted way better.

“You’re supposed to decorate them, not eat them.” Tony said as Peter munched on his only partially iced gingerbread cookie.

“I can’t help it.  They’re too good.” He said through a mouthful of crumbs.

Tony shook his head in mock exasperation.  “Well hopefully Cap doesn’t mind making more or all his hard work is going to be gone by the end of the night.”

“I don’t mind.” Steve said from the other side of the kitchen where he was rolling out more dough to cut with the cookie cutters.

“I’ve only had like two.” Peter rolled his eyes.

“I counted at least three.” Bruce piped in but didn’t take his concentration away from frosting the snowflake cookie in front of him.

“Five.” Nat said with a quirk of her lip while she sprinkled green and red crystal sprinkles over her tree cookie.

“No way I’ve had that many.” Peter protested.  “You must be losing your touch.”

Nat sent a fake glare his way and Peter tried to act appropriately cowed in the face of the Black Widow’s displeasure.  It didn’t work so well.  He broke into a grin instead.

“I also counted five.” Vision added from where he decorated his cookie, which looked more like something out of MOMA than a Christmas cookie.  He and Wanda had returned the night before, from wherever they’d been, to celebrate the holiday with the team while Clint and Scott had left a couple days earlier to spend Christmas with their families.

“Whose side are you on?” Peter asked with feigned betrayal as Tony cackled beside him.

“I was not aware there were sides.” Vision cocked his head sideways.

“There aren’t.” Wanda answered as she laughed softly next to Vision.  “It’s a joke.”

“Oh.  I see.” Vision nodded and went back to his cookie.

Peter reached to grab another fresh cookie, a sugar cookie this time, in the shape of a candy cane, but Tony lightly swatted the back of his hand.  

“Nuh uh.  No more cookies for you.”

“I’m going to decorate it, not eat it.”

Tony shot him a flat look of disbelief.  “You said that last time.  And the time before that.”

“Well this time I mean it.”

“Fine, but if you eat this one, you’re cut off for good.”

“Way to stick to your guns Stark.” Sam snorted over his snowman cookie.

Tony flipped him off without looking up from frosting his own cookie, but he didn’t stop Peter from grabbing the candy cane cookie.

As good as it looked, and as tempted as he was to eat it, Peter resisted and started frosting it instead, going for red and blue stripes instead of the classic red and white.  

“Are spiders colorblind?” Rhodey poked fun at his miscolored candy cane cookie as he finished sprinkling his own bell shaped one with silver sprinkle balls.

“No.” Peter said and checked to make sure the frosting had hardened enough before he leaned over to start piping white frosting in a thin and delicate rendition of his spider webs over the blue and red.  

“Because last I checked candy canes are red and white.”

“Hmm.” He said, distracted as he concentrated on finishing one of the webs and then starting on another.  “It’s my theme cookie.”

“Your what?”

“My theme cookie.” He explained as he finished the webbing overlays and leaned back.  “See?  Spiderman candy cane.”

“Nice.” Rhodey nodded and raised his eyebrows, clearly impressed.

“That looks good kid.” Tony smiled, clapping him on the back.

“Damn.  Why didn’t we think of that?” Sam asked.

“Yeah and what would your theme even be?” Rhodey asked.  “A bird?  What are you going to do, put one in a tree?”

Sam glared at him.

“If he made it look like a pear tree he could put a partridge in it.” Peter joked.

Everyone laughed.

“Not a bad idea kid, but it’d have to be a falcon, not a partridge.” Sam argued.

Peter shrugged and grabbed another cookie to decorate.  “Semantics.”

“Two turtle doves might be cuter.” Wanda offered with a smirk.  “One could be Falcon and the other Hawkeye.”

That got even more laughs.

“Ok.  That’s enough of making fun of the bird themed superheroes.” Sam said.  “Especially when Clint’s not even here to defend himself.  Besides, pipsqueak here is the only one who’s identity can even be turned into a cookie.”

“What are you talking about?  I just did it.” Nat smugly held up the cookie she’d just finished, an ornament shaped one, decorated black with her red Black Widow logo embossed in frosting on it.

“Nice.” Peter grinned.  It looked awesome.  “The spiders for the win.”  He reached across the counter and high fived her.

“Where did you even get black frosting?” Sam asked, looking around the countertop and not seeing any.

Nat just smiled.

“I don’t know.  I think I like this one better.” Tony said and held his own cookie up.  A snowman with red and yellow Ironman armor on and a blue arc reactor in the center of its chest.

“That looks awesome.” Peter said, impressed.  He didn’t know Tony could draw like that, even if it was only with frosting.  When he thought about it, though, he didn’t know why he was surprised.  Creating and engineering probably required a lot of skill in drawing.

“I know.  Don’t eat it.” Tony pointed a finger at him in warning as he set it back down on the counter to finish drying.

“No, this one’s definitely the best.” Bruce said, holding up a gingerbread cookie he’d frosted completely green with purple shorts.

“Nice.” Peter nodded.

“Looks good.” Tony agreed.

“How does this look?” Vision asked, holding up his own, an elaborately decorated tree cookie with two birds in it, one adorned in red and black with large wings and the other in black and purple with a bow across its back.

“That’s amazing Viz.” Wanda nodded.

“Yeah.” Rhodey agreed.  “See Sam?  You get your cookie after all.”

“Ok but seriously, where the hell is all the black frosting coming from?” Sam asked, scanning the counter top again.

Peter couldn’t help it.  He burst out laughing and everyone joined in.

The theme cookie decorating turned into a thing.  An ornament decorated to look like Captain America’s shield was next.  A snowman in the War Machine armor followed.  Then Vision made a gingerbread man cookie with the mind stone affixed to its forehead and Wanda made one with red in its palms and eyes.

Peter had to admit, it was a great way to spend the afternoon of Christmas Eve.  The easy camaraderie and happiness of the season was infectious.  There was no way he could stay sad even if he’d wanted to.

“You good?” Tony leaned in and asked when he’d been uncharacteristically quiet for a few minutes.

“Yeah.  I was just thinking.”

“Uh-huh.  About what?”

Peter smiled at the man that had become his dad as he answered, “May would’ve loved this.”

“Yeah?” Tony gave him a soft smile in return.

“Definitely.”

Tony wrapped an arm around his shoulders and tugged him in for a sideways hug.  “I think you’re right.  And I have to say, this has been one of my favorite Christmases so far.”

“Really?”

Tony nodded.

“Why?”

“Because I get to spend it with you.”

Peter’s eyes were twinkling as he smiled up at his dad.

“And I know it’s probably tough for you, but I hope you’re having at least a little fun.”

“I am.  You’ve been trying really hard.”

“I have.” Tony admitted.  “Is it working?”

“Yeah.  It’s working.”

“Good.”

Tony ruffled his hair and they went back to cookie decorating.  And eating.  

A part of Peter’s heart still constantly ached from the emptiness of May’s absence, but a larger part was filled with happiness and the joy of the season that Tony’s efforts had inevitably brought.  

He knew May wouldn’t begrudge him his holiday cheer.  Just like he knew she wouldn’t mind him changing his name.  He wondered again if the whole Ross kidnapping him and almost dying thing had been worth it in the end just to know that his family loved him and only wanted the best for him.  For him to be happy.

A wet tap on his nose snapped his attention back to the present.

“Smile Rudolph.” Nat grinned as he touched the tip of his nose where she’d smeared a glob of red frosting.

Peter gaped for only a split second before retaliating by flinging a handful of his white frosting at her.  She tried to duck but still ended up getting it on her cheek and in her hair.

“Oh, now you started it.” Nat warned.

“No, you did.” Peter countered.

“No!  Don’t even think about it!” Tony warned holding his hands up between them, but Nat was already dipping her hand into the red frosting bowl next to her.

“Guys let’s not—” Steve tried to reason with them.  He was cut off as Nat splattered Tony and Peter with a fistful of red frosting.

“—do this.” Steve sighed.

Peter laughed at Steve’s resignation and his dad’s face covered in frosting.

“You’re dead Romanov.” Tony threatened, and then it was an all out frosting food fight.

As Peter ducked down beneath the counter to avoid getting splattered, he had to admit that the Avengers sure knew how to liven up the season.

[fmdjaewonarchive]

► alarm.

date(s): 25 july - 20 august 2020 mentions of: soo (very briefly, like, literally once) word count: 1,439 warnings: n/a details: a solo for the first two episodes of our songs filming, mainly focussed on the creative process behind writing alarm.

‘i’m feeling pretty confident’ had been one of jaewon’s closing remark when they had interviewed him as they had finished the first day of filming when they had just received the mission.

of course, that was a big fucking lie.

jaewon’s confidence was nowhere to be found, neither were any actual ideals as to how to tackle the mission. all there was was the overwhelming anxiety about how he was going to mess this up, how he was gonna fail before he even got to properly try.

a song that would convince everyone to listen to his music, that had to be a damn joke right? jaewon couldn’t name a single reason as to why anyone should listen to his music, he just made something that sounded good to his own ears and hoped anyone would share the sentiment. the longer he thought about it, the more he felt like truly he had nothing to do on this show.

what had he gotten himself into?

-----------------------------------------------------

the thing was, jaewon wasn’t a composer. he had dabbled around in it a little bit but none of it had ever been shared with the world and that was for a very simple reason, he didn’t think his work was anywhere near professional enough to be released for other people to hear.

dimensions entertainment seemed to agree with that, which was why the had put him in one of the companies many studios with one of the in-house producers.

(a part of jaewon felt like this was cheating. surely, plenty of the other contestants possessed the skill to manage the entire creative process behind their songs themselves. didn’t that in itself mean they were much more talented than he was? what did they still need this fucking show for?)

“the theme is identity right?” the producer asked. he knew the man decently well, they’d worked together on a few songs through the years which at least meant that he was familiar with jaewon’s music to some degree. “so what of your currently released songs describes your identity the most? that should give us a decent starting point for creating an instrumental you can work with.”

jaewon’s eyebrows furrowed together at the question. a long, silent moment passing as he contemplated the answer. “anything from biorhythm.” he responded, expression wry as he remembered his last album, what a mess that had been. “roommates only or still if you want me to get specific.”

“and you want another song like those on biorhythm?” the producer asked. it was a fair question. if there was one thing jaewon had been guilty of so far with his music it was probably getting stuck in his comfort zone, any songs that he had a big creative input in had always been written for himself, not because he had been tasked to do so but because they came easily to him. he had yet to really branch out of that safe zone.

but this mission was about his identity and if anything described his identity well, it was probably the biorhythm album.

“yeah, for now i do.” jaewon admitted with a light nod. “might i actually manage to get somewhere on this show i can worry about experimenting or thinking outside the box or whatever.” if he would even get that far and with how it was going so far, jaewon didn’t know if he dared to hope for that. “for now i think i need something familiar, something that fits in well with the rest of my music.” in an afterthought he added “like, my actual music, not whatever dimensions decided my sound was for that cluster fuck of a last album.” and the comment earned him a humored scoff from the producer before they got to work.

they ended up working way longer than the initially scheduled studio time, evening bleeding into the night before either of them really realized it. but the hard work paid off because by the time he bids the producer a good night and goes home, jaewon has the bare bones of a song. so far, the track was a gentle piano tune that blended into a deep, more electronic bass sound in the chorus that added to the overarching melancholic feel of the song.

most importantly, it sounded like his song. the producer had painstakingly made sure that every sound, every beat had been to jaewon’s liking, perfectly tailored to a song that sounded so entirely his that it felt like the man had been reading his mind. only it sounded better than anything jaewon could have ever made with his own two hands.

it managed to calm his nerve some, having a solid starting point to start working from. maybe, this wasn’t doomed to go wrong after all, maybe jaewon could manage to stand his ground in this competition after all. for the first episodes then at least.

also, he really owed this poor producer something for keeping him up till like 3 am.

-----------------------------------------------------

logically, the next step was to write the lyrics, simple enough right?

except it wasn’t.

it hadn’t been for a lack of trying, there had been multiple days so far where jaewon had locked himself in his home studio, trying to force himself to write the damn song already with very little success. there had been a few drafts, all of which he had abandoned long before they could really take a solid shape. none of it was simply good enough.

how was he gonna prove himself as a songwriter if he couldn’t even write one fucking song?

the biggest problem was that jaewon was slowly running out of time. he had told himself to make sure he had the bulk of his work done by the 7th of august. not because he would be pushing the deadline too soon otherwise, hell, the final version didn’t have to be in till the 30th. but unity made their comeback on the 7th (their first one in over a year) and jaewon knew it would take a huge toll on the time he had to write, he had to be done before then.

instead, the 7th came and went without a single lyric written.

it was the 12th already (or maybe technically the 13th already judging by how late at night it was) when he found time to withdraw himself into his home studio again and truth be told, jaewon had little faith he would actually be able to get anything done. he was absolutely drained, the day had been long and hectic and judging from the fact he had to do the whole circus over again the next day as well, starting way too early in the damn morning, he probably direly needed his sleep.

god, all jaewon wanted was to sleep in, just one day, no alarms or anything.

now wait a damn minute…

maybe tonight would amount to something after all.

for someone that had been so lethargic mere minutes ago, jaewon managed to pull up audio file of the track in mere seconds, listening to the instrumental in it’s entirety a time or two, tapping his fingers along on the desk to the music before he began writing.

don’t set it today alarm, alarm, alarm, close, close, close your eyes

he finished the entire first draft that night, only forcing himself to put the pen down so he would at least sleep. the irony of the situation mocked him as he put his alarm for 6am before getting in bed and wrapping himself around soo for a mere 2 hours of sleep but he didn’t dwell on it.

-----------------------------------------------------

it took him another two late night sessions to finish up the lyrics for the final product but truth be told, said studio time was divided between nearly falling asleep and actually writing as unity’s promotions began to weight down on him harder the more they progressed.

not that there was much of a rush. the official recording was only scheduled for the 20th of august to incorporate whatever working points that had come from the live preview he had given during filming a few days earlier into the final version of the song.

he was yet again aided by the same producer that he had been working with before, the one that had so kindly composed the instrumental for him. “you ready?” the man asked through microphone connecting to the recording booth.

“yeah, yeah let’s do this.” jaewon responded, words followed with a half-hearted thumbs up before adjusting the headphones on his head. he looked almost confident in the whole thing.

almost.

[for-bucks-sake]

An Apron is Just a Cape On Backwards (Not a Superhero).

Pairing: Stucky x Reader Word count: 6K. This is a whole beast. I hope that’s not too bad.  Warnings: all the fluff!, some angst, smut!! (threesome, DP, fingering, attempt thigh riding.) ,some bad language, LOVE. And for the mad people who haven’t seen it yet: Endgame spoilers.  Summary: Everything was lost, but then it wasn’t. Reader, Steve and Bucky have to make up for lost time. Soon they find it not as easy as they thought, especially because one of them didn’t actually lose anything.  A/N: Some guy was annoying the shit out of me, trashing Steve and Bucky’s friendship, so I cheered myself up by writing a second part that literally no one asked for (also I might’ve written this only bc I’m obsessed with naming my fics weird shit). So this is part 2 of Missing Is a Recurring Theme! Hope you like it! (Also, I am a whore for artist!Steve.) **If anyone is interested, I actually have some spare time, so...Requests are open!

Gif is not mine.

“Hot Stuff Coming Through?” Y/n squinted to read the printed words on Bucky’s ridiculous apron, realization hitting her and she threw her head back, ringing laugh pleasantly filling the room, “when did you get this?”

Bucky was the only one standing in the kitchen. No sign of Steve. His growing hair was tied up on the top of his head in a failed bun, miserable strands of hair escaping it only to be coated with sweat and unidentified powders. Somehow, he managed to already severely stain the black apron and the breathable black t-shirt he wore underneath, spatula in one hand and a knife in the other.

“We got it yesterday,” he said innocent enough, flexing his impressive biceps in different poses, showing off his great new purchase. Y/n breathed, shaking her head, “Wait until you see Steve’s, and yours, of course! Which reminds me, get out of the kitchen!.” “You called me here!” She protested, hitting Bucky with the book she held; Oh, how she wished it wasn’t a paperback. “We’re working on a surprise for you, Darling. You have to keep your eyes closed, or at least stand with your back to us.” “Sure thing, Hot Stuff.” She chuckled, turning around just in time to face Steve going through the kitchen door, wearing a nearly identical apron, clear bag in his hand.

“I got the colors but I’m not sure we have enough blu-“ startled, he stopped talking when he saw her, just in time to hear Bucky’s loud demands he shuts the fuck up. “Colors? What are you two planning? It’s not even my birthday.” Steve gifted her with one of his loop side smiles, “I only said it to throw you off, sweetheart.”

He went around her and passed the plastic bag to the metal arm reaching for him in a sleek motion, pausing for a second above her head indecisively before  kissing the top of it. Bucky’s heart nearly skipped a beat.

Y/n touched Steve’s shoulder as a response, brushing the bare spot the white fabric of his shirt didn’t cover, it was somehow quieter than before.

Bucky cleared his throat, “hypothetically speaking, if we wanted to bake a cake.” Y/n opened her mouth, but was cut when he continued, “hypothetically! Do we really need to add eggs? Back in the day only flour and water were enough.”

“OH MY GOD.” She groaned at Steve’s amused face,

“So…Is that a yes?” Bucky asked again, looking genuinely lost,

“I’m out of here!” Y/n almost sang, stressing the the last words. She left the room, unlocking her phone while imagining the horrors said room is going to go through.

She stepped back, pulling herself closer to the kitchen space, but never entering - only her head visible - “I sent you a link, there are thousands of recipes for cakes. Just choose one.”

They looked grateful, hands petting their pockets, already looking for their phones, “thank you, doll”

She nodded, almost leaving again; “you sure you don’t need help?” She asked on a second thought, blinking and bringing her arms to her sides,

“We’ll be okay,” Bucky said, “besides, this is supposed to be a surprise, c’mon, let us do something nice for you for once.”

She bit her bottom lip and sighed, “Ok, whatever you want.” She stepped out of the kitchen again, “Just, please don’t paint the kitchen with food coloring, it’s going to be a hell to clean up.”

“I told you, there would be no colors involved!” Steve yelled after her, followed by a not so subtle snort from Bucky.

“I thought superheroes weren’t supposed to lie!” Y/n fired back, making herself comfortable on the sofa, opening the book at the marked page. She heard Bucky laughing again, this time joined by his partner in crime,

“Well, good thing we’re not ones anymore!”

Domestic really suited them, she then thought, and happiness might make her explode.

-

“Stevie, this is…I’m at a loss of  words. It’s amazing.” Bucky always did love to praise him, all the way back to the 20th century. He could feel him, soft man inside soft clothes, behind him. Breath warm and light on his neck, making the small hairs erect from the proximity.

“It’s not even finished yet, you really think she’s gonna like it?” Steve eyed his work, melting into Bucky’s touch as he wrapped solid arms around his waist, kissing his shoulder and humming into his skin.

“I know she will.”

Steve shifted his body, turning around to meet a beautiful pair of eyes, today more grey than blue; like ocean skies early in an April morning. It’s a little game he likes to play with himself - what did Bucky’s eye color resemble today? In all the years he played, he didn’t get the same answer twice.

“What?” The skies in his eyes chuckled along when Steve stared too long, the skin around Bucky’s eyes wrinkled, a pleasant reminder of how his life had changed, laughter so acquainted with his face it decided to leave a permanent mark.

“Nothin’.” Steve smiled at the thought, feeling the hands around his middle tightened, “I just love you.”

Bucky licked his lips, gaze falling quickly to a pink, delicious mouth he could never resist. Their breaths were heavy, warm, mixing in the small space between them until Steve reached for his hair, resting his elbows on Bucky’s broad shoulders as he found his bun, fingers digging into it, messing it up impossible more, strands of hair falling to frame his face.

“Steve,” Bucky swallowed, nose brushing against nose, so close to him, he spoke into Steve’s own lips.

“Yeah?” He breathed, teeth nibbling at Bucky’s bottom lip, beard grazing his smooth jaw,

“Kiss me.”

Their mouths connected, Steve’s hands still in Bucky’s hair, knotting and pulling harder, forcing him closer; Bucky gasped, head tilted right as he found a better access, his tongue moving slowly over Steve’s lips, sucking on the corner of his mouth. Steve panted Bucky’s name, releasing one of his hands from his hair and bringing it to cup his jaw; right hand pulling his chin up, allowing Steve to trace his tongue on the warmth of Bucky’s, pressing his teeth lightly into his lower lip. 

They smelled like baking, with the faintest hint of sweat. Bucky’s pulp lips sugary to the taste, probably from all the bites he snuck into his mouth, ignoring Steve’s protests.

Metal hand soothed up and down his back, chilly material still unusual to the skin even through a t-shirt. Steve leaned his back against the counter, parting the kiss with a wet sound. Bucky smiled lazily, eyes hooded  as he nuzzled his face into Steve’s neck, fluttering kisses into his most sensitive spots,

“God.” He signed, brushing lips against the sharp edge of Steve’s jawline, “I miss your beard.”

-

Screams from the kitchen was all she heard before she threw her book to the side, cursing everything in the world she had to abandon the last ten pages unread.

Muffled swearing, a terrified “Steve.”, a burnt small and when she entered the kitchen, grey smoke.

“What happened?” Y/n asked, catching her breath but still very much alarmed.

“Nothing!” One of them said in an unnaturally high squeak she couldn’t recognize. Steve cleared his throat, “nothing.” He said again, more composed, fanning furiously the smoking oven along with Bucky.

Once the loud beeping sound stopped - smell still strong and unpleasant in their noses, but the black screen died down - they faced her, the epitome of innocence with their boyish smiles, posture hunched as they fiddled with their hands, looking astonishingly alike.

“We’re sorry.” Steve said, eyebrows furrowed as he struggled to look up, “it’s m’fault. I was so busy paint- working on something else I got distracted-“

“No no, we both know it’s on me, I should’ve-“

“I’m gonna stop you right there.” Y/n said, arms crossed against her chest as she cut them both sharply, they could be so serious sometimes. “All you did was burn half the kitchen! Lighten up guys.” She continued before they had a chance to speak, “there are no faults, I’m not mad.” She smiled, as to convince them she was telling the truth.

Both men exhaled at the same time, relieved the mess they made wasn’t gonna get them in trouble. “I can’t be mad at you, c’mon.” Y/n said wholeheartedly, bringing her arms to the side and walking forward, nudging their shoulders as to cheer them up, “I’m just upset you worked all day for nothing.” She sighed, searching for their hands, she took Bucky’s metallic palm in her right, and Steve’s in her left.

“It’s not entirely for nothing.” Bucky motioned, cupping her face, calloused flesh holding delicate features. He smiled at her, then at Steve, standing inside their impromptu circle made of limbs- “Now,” a dopey grin smudge his red lips, looking proud of himself, “we can get pizza!”

-

“You seemed a little too keen on throwing out all the food you’ve worked on, don’t you think? And look at the road!”

Bucky chuckled, stirring his gaze from her to the black sedan in front of them, “I’d much rather look at you, sugar.” He teased in a sickeningly sweet voice, y/n rolled her eyes, pretending to puke. “No one is moving anyway.” He hit the wheel in frustration, she swore she heard it creaks, “and for your question, darl’,” Bucky looked at her again, “I am extremely,” he stressed, “bummed out it didn’t work. And I mean EXTREMELY. Besides, it wasn’t the main surprise, Steve’s still working on it at home.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she huffed, gently touching his jaw and guiding it to face forward; he opened his mouth, tilting his head down to try and bite her finger, he grazed it with his front teeth and kissed it. Her smile turned to a loud laugh as a very enthusiastic driver honked his horn off behind them, universal way of signaling someone to fucking drive. Bucky didn’t have to look to see the “I told you so” all over her face.

“Shut up.” He muttered under his breath,

She pursed her smiling lips, looking innocent as ever, “I didn’t say anything.”

-

They drove in silence, Bucky hummed to the beat of her fingers drumming on the window.

“Is something wrong?” He said suddenly, making y/n jolt herself up.

“Is there something that should be wrong?” She asked, confused by the unforeseen question,

He sighed heavily, “with you and Steve…I mean.”

Oh shit. “I don’t think so, no.” She swallowed, picking at her fingernails.

“I thought superheroes weren’t supposed to lie.” Damn them, both of them and their way of knowing exactly what she feels.

“I’m not a superhero.”

“You are to me.” He said quietly, both looking intensely at the road.

“I’m not lying,” she exhaled, bringing her abused nails to her lips, biting, “it’s just… Everything is good, you know? Great. I love you, I love you both more than ever.” She shifted in her sit again, visibly uncomfortable.

“We never talked about this.” Her voice was quiet now, barely above a whisper, “I mean really talked about this. When you were gone…it was hard to keep going like everything was normal, so we somehow adjusted to a new normal, our normal. And then you came back, which I’m grateful for, everyday.” She bit her bottom lip, bringing her legs closer to her lap.

“I wake up and I see you, I see him, and I want to cry. Cry because I never thought I would be this lucky again. But when you came back we had to discover the old normal again, remember it, face the damage our previous poor way of coping did to us. Five years is a long time, Buck.”

She was holding her breath, Bucky could tell, the way she was holding her thoughts up until now.

He often forgot. He hated the feeling of memories disintegrating from his grip, in small, unnoticeable bits that he worked so hard scraping together. Most of the things come back to him eventually, the good and the bad. But this was a different type of forgetting; this time he had nothing to remember.

Sometimes it just hit him, when he watched them. How everything so drastically changed when he was gone. He saw it in the dark circles around her eyes, never seemed to fade or to brightened, no matter how much time had gone or how well rested she was. Sometimes it was in the new crease on Steve’s forehead, a grounding reminder that they, too, can run out of time. Sometimes he saw it in their faints attempts to wake up early for morning runs, can’t keep up even when they do. Sometimes it was in the hesitation in Steve’s eyes, every time he came in contact with her skin, almost afraid she doesn’t want his touch anymore.

For Bucky there was nothing to remember, but for them- there was too much to forget.

And he hated it, blaming himself in true Bucky Barnes fashion. Like he had any say on the matter. Sometime, he thinks that if he had, he’d tell them to move on.

Bucky’s life were hard on him, cruel, even - but they also taught him that time was invaluable. Precious seconds and moments had to be clenched on to, not be wasted, not be overlooked; that’s how he knew they should’ve let go. Instead of latching onto the memory of him, distant fading version of  the man he is in their minds, they could’ve started over, make their new normal a permanent one. They could’ve learned to love each other without him. They could’ve healed.

In a greedy, ugly pit inside the dark depths of his heart he was glad they didn’t, selfishness getting the best of him, thinking he might have killed himself if he woke up only to realize he doesn’t have anyone to wake up to.

Five years is a long time.

He gripped the wheel harder with two hands, nearly creating small valleys in the shape of his fingers, “He loves you.” He hushed, in a way that was almost intimate, like a secret.

“I know.”

“Sometimes I think he is going to break. He lost me so many times. Too many times in one lifetime. If he didn’t have you…He would’ve.”

“I would’ve, too.” Y/n whispered,

“I know.” He said softly, body loosen up as he spoke, “you kept each other together, you saved each other from falling apart. That’s love.”

She stayed quiet as Bucky found a parking spot, squeezing the car in a tight fit.

Her mind was roaming, she had a lot to think about.

“Let’s go?”

-

“God I missed this place.” Bucky beamed at the smell, his entire demeanor changes as they walked into the small pizzeria. Fresh dough was baking, a game was on on the beat up TV screen near the freezers, fluorescent lights planting small stars inside his eyes. Suddenly, y/n felt different, too.

They found their way between the tables, an old woman with a child were sitting to their right, a young couple to their left, some elderly men yelled at the television, heating up in a meaningless argument over the players.

They reached the cashier, first in line. His eyes looked tired, yet he treated them with a smile accompanied with a cheerful “what can I get ya?”,not letting the long shift get to him. “We’d like two large pizzas please, one with extra cheese…” Bucky’s voice faded as she dived deeper into her thoughts. His left hand was light on the small of her back, chilling the narrow strip of skin revealed when her t-shirt rode up.

Y/n looked around, tuning down the talking and the noise even more, only to catch a glimpse of a familiar face, now very less bearded, somehow younger looking. A small towel in a soft yellow hung from his shoulder, and the friendly smile that was always there didn’t disappoint, directed to her yet again. He nodded as their gazes crossed, an undisputed spark of recognition floating inside his eyes as he glanced quickly at Bucky.

The old man didn’t stay much longer, responding to the loud “dad!” calls from the back by returning quickly, not before he caught y/n nodding back, latching Bucky closer.

-

They drove in silence. Y/n trying to balance the square boxes on her lap as Bucky allowed himself to steal a slice, taking a bite every time they stopped at a red light.

“This is,” he announced with his mouth full, defying the quiet, “the best pizza ever!”

She chuckled, tightening her grip around the sides of the steaming carton, “save the declarations for Steve, I don’t really care for it either way.”

“You have to decide which side are you on!” Bucky said, finishing and swallowing his bite, looking at her, “playing both sides isn’t going to work any longer baby.”

“ROAD!” She grunted, momentarily losing her balance and falling forward, almost covering her entire sit with cheese and sauce.

“Y/n? You okay?” Bucky’s voice was concerned, and he was looking at her, again.

“I’m fine! Stop looking at me!” She moved, adjusting to a more comfortable position,

“C’mon now, you know I can drive us safely with my eyes closed.”

“I’m sure you can, you’ve had a lot of practice, too?” She scuffed,

“As a matter of fact,” he tensed, smiling sadly, “I have.”

They didn’t talk for the rest of the drive, and Bucky didn’t stir his eyes from the highway.

-

“Time for the surprise!.” Bucky announced after they sat down, eating wordlessly except from his occasional blissful moans, and Steve’s grumpy noises of disgust.

Y/n looked down at him, baffled. Her hands paused their continuant motion in the past twenty minutes. He sat between her legs, hard feelings long forgotten - placated by tender twining of fingers through his hair; chipped nails gently scratching his scalp and slowly descending to the top of his shoulders.

Steve looked up as well, tossing his pepperoni slice back to the box, willingly abandoned. “Sure. I’ll go get it.”

Y/n glanced at Steve, immediately bringing her gaze down to Bucky again, “C’mon, you really shouldn’t have.”

They both dismissed her, getting up and disappearing in the kitchen.

Y/n followed them with her gaze, despite her protests she was giddy with excitement, what it was didn’t matter - the thought of how hard they worked on it all day was enough to make her happy with whatever they made.

Blond head emerged from the room first, quicker than she thought, followed by Bucky- their hands bearing gifts;

Steve held three aprons, and what looked like a tray with a knife on it, laying next to something that was covered, she couldn’t see what it was.

Gently pushing the nearly empty pizza boxes, Steve placed the tray on the table, tossing each the matching clothes.

“Are we really gonna wear them?” Hers was different, printed colors all over it, and even in its folded state she had a vague idea what was on it.

“Open it!” Bucky clapped after he finished tying his behind his back. He was a little too enthusiastic. She caught a glimpse of Steve smiling conspicuously, can’t keep a straight face as she unfolded the apron, revealing a picture of a very detailed, hairy belly. Rolls that seemed like they were acquired by abusing the use of beer, and a pair of man boobs that horrifiedly were too similar to her own for her liking.

Both men howled with laughter, can’t contain themselves any longer when she put it on.

“Do you like it?” Bucky snickered, wiping tears from the corner of his eyes.

“You know what?” She raised an eyebrow, checking herself out, “It’s kinda growing on me.” How unbelievable it was that technically, those men were over a hundred years old.

“Good.” Steve tried to keep a straight face, failing miserably, “because you’re never, you’re never taking this off.”

“Oh, never? Not even for…?” Y/n bit her lips suggestively, looking at them as they looked at each other. She was just teasing, getting them riled up as a payback. She was trying to be funny, but their expressions weren’t as playful.

She stayed in her place, untying the ridiculous apron, unbuttoning her jeans and letting it fall down to her hips.

That was quick, she thought as they walked towards her in unison, trapping her between them and the couch.

Bucky pushed down the denim, letting her step out of it while he sat, parting his legs and pulling her down for a kiss.

Steve tangled his long fingers in her hair, smoothly pressing her against Bucky’s lips, deepening the kiss as she moaned into his mouth; Bucky groaned, hoisting her up on his lap, desperately seeking more friction. His metal arm clutched her waist with a force she knew was going to leave bruises, his other hand was holding her head in place, replacing Steve as he began to kiss her neck, sucking at the skin until it was red and angry. He smirked when she cried out, breaking the kiss only for Bucky to pull her back in. Steve licked at the ruptured blood vessels, soothing them with his tongue before he moved to a new patch of skin.

Y/n gripped Bucky’s shoulder, dire for even the slightest relief, grinding against his clothed crotch, using him to keep her balance. She was suddenly stopped when his arm held her hips steady, not allowing her to move.

“Uh, uh sweetheart,” She heard Steve rasping in her ear, biting at her earlobe, making her squirm under him, “you’re not getting off that easy.”

It was like they found their rhythm again, like buying a new record of old songs; they held her between them, undressing themselves and what’s left of her clothes, not even bothering to leave the couch.

Being so close to them was like a cure; nothing could touch her, nothing but them. She felt the weight of Steve’s lips on hers, tracing his soft tongue on her teeth, breathing lightly into her, opening her mouth for him. She didn’t need anything else.

Bucky found her right breast, bare and soft, with only the contrast of her hardening nipple reacting to his slow circles around it, only stopping to pinch her pink nub, rolling it between his fingers. He chuckled softly when her breath hitched, clinging to Steve’s naked chest and pushing her ass closer to Bucky’s cock.

She shifted on his lap, somehow; now facing Steve, mouth on his, and her back to Bucky, allowing him a better access to her sex.

Slowly, he lowered his hand, the cold of the metal meeting her heat, creating a contrasting sensation that made her whole body shiver with pleasure.

“Look at you,” he whispered in her ear, syncing the movements of both of his hands on her, “you’re so wet.”

Y/n hummed in response, hand shaping into a fist around Steve’s bicep when he caught her other breast, giving the same attention to it as Bucky.

“You’re so good for us doll.” He kissed the edge of her jaw, “Such a good girl, so wet for us.”

She groaned as Bucky slid a smooth finger inside her, slowly pumping it in and out, stretching her enough to insert a second finger between her folds.

“Faster, please.” She cried, mouth now free as Steve resumed working on marking her skin, sucking at her collarbone, allowing her to be as vocal as she wants.

“Steve, Bucky,” she bit her bottom lip, unable to divide her attention; Bucky moving faster inside her, thumb teasing her clit, and Steve squeezing her tits, bringing one of them to his mouth and scraping her sensitive nipple. It was all becoming too much.

Her hips buckled, breaths becoming more urgent as she moaned their names,

“Do you want to cum, darling?” Bucky asked from behind, not any less urgent than her, his cock becoming uncomfortably harder against his stomach and her ass by the second.

Y/n nodded furiously, swallowing a sob when a third digit entered her, “oh shit, I’m so close.”

Steve caressed her cheek, tracing the shape of her red lips with his thumb. She kissed it, taking it in her mouth fully, tongue spiraling its form and coating it with her saliva, hollowing her cheeks around it.

The heat rose to her face, knots tying up inside her stomach and going higher and higher, taking her closer to the edge.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. Come for us.”

She didn’t know who said it, too caught up in her own pleasure, but it was enough; The waves of her orgasm hit her all at once, she moaned loudly around Steve’s thumb, as Bucky didn’t stop, riding her high with her, fingers still being pushed in and out of her, milking her of her pleasure with sweet reassurance in her ears.

Bucky kissed her shoulder as she came down, still sensitive when he pulled his fingers from her heat. He growled when he saw how drenched they were, the metal collecting a good amount of her juices, “Fuck, baby.” Bucky smirked, both men fascinated by her reaction to them as if it was the first time, “I always miss your taste so much.”

He brought two wet fingers to his lips, relishing on her cum, moaning in pleasure for how sweet she is. Steve shuffled closer, bringing himself so close he was sharing Bucky’s lap with her.

He bit his lips, hungrily eyeing Bucky’s forefinger, untouched, still dripping with her. 

Steve secured his hand around the metal wrist in a firm grip, waiting for Bucky to lick his fingers clean, and taking the third one into his mouth, sucking at it until there was nothing left.

Bucky swallowed, cock twitching at the sensation of Steve’s tongue on his body. The subtle reaction captured Steve’s attention, and he moved even more forward, squeezing y/n between them, her eyes hooded in a post orgasm bliss, renewed arousal starting to form in her core again when she felt the weight of Steve against her sensitive pussy.

“C’mere.” Steve motioned, voice deep from lust. Bucky swallowed again when he felt a tug at his hair, pulling him forward. Steve crushed his lips on his, the delicious flavor of y/n still on their tongue as they tasted it off each other, breathlessly exploring. Steve took a hold of Bucky’s thick shaft, stroking him from the base to the tip, removing the precum with his thumb and smearing it on y/n lips blindly, not breaking the kiss. She whimpered, eagerly licking it off.

Steve’s hips jolted involuntarily, forcing them to part, barely catching their breath.

“Fuck, Steve…Please.” Y/n moaned at the new friction, suddenly needy for more. He positioned himself farther, just in front of her entrance, teasing her with his tip, as Bucky parted her thighs, holding her in place.

She shifted, head shaking as she turned to Bucky. “I want both of you.”

His breath hitched in his throat, the clutch of his fingers tightening around her, “it’s been so long, baby. Are you sure you’re read-“

“Please? Bucky, Steve?” She was begging now, voice small, eyes pleading, the pink blush on her cheeks matched the scarlet color of her lips, reminding Bucky of a rose. The red tint casted a celestial shadow across her face, highlighting the splatter of freckles on her nose, her dilated pupils overpowering the color of her eyes. There’s so much self restraint a man can have.

“Okay.” He said hoarsely, barley able to control himself, “whatever you want, darling.”

She smiled, biting her lips to obscure it. She didn’t care it’s been years since they were both inside her. She wanted them. Needed them.

Bucky dipped his fingers inside her soaked core, coating himself in her fluids. She gasped when he pulled them out, slowly, his other hand was parting her asscheeks, searching for her entrance.

“Shh,” Bucky kissed her left shoulder, rubbing circles around the tight ring of muscles, using her own juices as a lubricant, “relax for me, baby.”

Y/n sighed, feeling Steve length on her folds, still not pushing inside her. He stroked her hair, leaving fluttering kisses on her neck, so different from the aggressive lovebites he previously left there.

She felt her muscles loosen around Bucky, slowly but surly opening her up for him.

“Buck.” She inhaled sharply as he managed to get a finger inside her. Steve was rubbing lazy circles on her clit, and she thought she’ll cum again, the familiar coil in her guts starting to form.

“Again already?” Bucky chuckled behind her, recognizing her rapid breaths and the clutching of her walls around him. He added a second finger, sliding inside her smoothly, “I guess we’ll have to pick up the pace.”

A couple of pumps later, and he pressed a third digit into her hole, it was a tighter fit, muscles resisting it at first, but he was persistent.

“So tight.” He exhaled, humming at the nape of her neck. Y/n opened her eyes, not realizing how hard she shut them, only to see Steve’s hungry look on them, devouring both of their naked forms.

She felt the fire igniting in the pit of her stomach, a softer pleasure washing her when she came, panting and hiding her face in the crook of Steve’s neck.

Steve chest vibrated with laugher, placing a hand on her back, “Are you okay?”

Y/n nodded, leaving the safety of his neck to look at him, words too difficult to form.

“We’re almost there,” Bucky reassured, gathering her newly found slick to coat his cock, pulling out his fingers. He moved himself to her entrance, stretching her painfully even with all his caution.

“Yes, just like that baby, you’re doing so good.” He praised her while caressing her arm, moving another inch deeper until his base hit her ass.

She let out a strangled gasp, shutting her eyes and correcting her breaths. Steve squeezed her palm, signaling her to open her eyes. She looked at him, already looking wrecked; “Are you sure, y/n? It’s okay if you-“

Y/n bit her bottom lip, smiling at him as sweetly as she could, “pretty please?”

The man huffed, letting out a low chuckle and placed himself against her dripping cunt, thrusting his hips into hers, gradually filling her up.

“Oh shit.”

It was always overwhelming at the first thrust. Being so full she forgot how empty she used to be. The stretch opening her up, reminding of something she hasn’t felt in five years. Right now, she might’ve felt complete.

She wasn’t ready, until now, having them both in the same level of intimacy like before. But this was so impromptu, so raw, so them; it was only natural for her to feel like herself again.

They stayed still inside her, giving her the time to adjust, already twitching, and she felt every inch of them against her damp walls, clenching around them, making it unbearable for them not to budge.

Y/n was the one to initiate. Recognizing how restless they grew, she rolled her hips, a whine escaping her lips just when Steve and Bucky moaned deeply, holding onto her.

She did it again, this time it stung less, her body getting accustomed to the presence of them inside,

“Y/n.” Bucky groaned, holding her hips in a steel grip.

“Yes?” She blinked at him, innocently.

“Stop that.”

“Why?”

“You’re hurting yourself.”

There was a pause, “I’m not, it’s okay.”

Steve and Bucky shared a look above her head, brief but meaningful. Steve pulled himself back slowly, stopping at the half of his length, only to pound into her again; she shut her eyes, her hands on Steve’s bare chest, feeling the flex of his muscles under it.

Bucky did the same thing- he drew himself out and pushed back in, knuckles tightening around her middle.

Beads of sweat formed in the valley of her breasts as they slammed harder each time, picking up a pace between themselves, moving in turns and then together, whispering words to sooth her pain.

Y/n was a mess under them, being so completely full, any discomfort long gone or replaced by pleasure.

“Guys,” she whimpered, “I’m close.”

Her eyes teared up, head shot back and met Bucky’s shoulder; she squirmed, able to taste her edge now. She couldn’t take it, her hips shifting involuntarily to the sides as they fucked into her.

They held her still again, nearly collapsing over her from how close they were, how good she took them.

She was the first one to come. Waves on waves of pleasure striking harder than before. She could taste her salty tears and hear herself screaming, nails clawing at anything she could find.

“Fuck!” Bucky grunted, hips thrusting into her repeatedly until he came inside her, leaning his head on her neck, holding her close for Steve to continue until he got his release.

“Shh, baby." Bucky whispered, “It’s okay, we’ve got you.” Steve rocked her body, crushing his hips into hers desperately, his eyebrows furrowed, cheeks rosy. He was close too.

She whined, clutching walls around him for the last time, not having any energy left in her to do anything else. Steve inhaled sharply, the tightness of her pushing him over the edge.

He spilled hot shots inside her, nearly collapsing on top of her in a tangle of sweaty bodies.

They stayed like this, not daring to move, still buried deep within each other.

“We forgot the cake.” Y/n laughed breathily.

“You weren’t supposed to know it’s a cake.” Bucky muttered, toying with a couple wet strands of her hair lazily.

“We kinda gave it up, Buck.” Steve admitted, “I’m pulling out, sweetheart.” He gave her a few seconds to prepare -say goodbye to the comforting warmth of the both of them surrounding her- lifting himself up using the arm of the sofa. In one slick motion he was no longer inside her, the sudden emptiness alien and unwanted. A mix of her juices dripped down her legs slowly, blending with the shots of cum Bucky left in her, too, as he mirrored Steve’s actions, removing himself from her hole.

It was awfully lonely all of a sudden.

“C’mon baby.” Bucky lifted her up as well, handling her as gently as he could, “let’s get you cleaned up.”

“No, no.” Y/n protested, “I wanna see the surprise.”

“It can wait for tomorrow.” Steve said, piling up the boxes on the table, cleaning up after them.

“You didn’t spend all day making it so I would see it tomorrow, show me.” She was stubborn, persistent, they knew too well it was a losing battle once she sat her mind to something. And she was already set on the couch again. They exchanged looks, sighing and sitting down to her sides.

“It’s not much.” Steve said, suddenly feeling self conscious about his work.

“It’s amazing,” Bucky reassured, knowing Steve isn’t going to uncover it himself so he did it instead, peeling the cover off to reveal it.

Y/n gasped, drinking in the work of art in front of her; It was a rectangle shaped chocolate cake, completed with white frosting evenly spread on top.

There was a painting drawn into the cream, light strokes of brush that only one person could create, a beautiful mess of blue and red, like watercolors fighting to create harmony between them. It was them, it took her a while to find sense in the chaos, but eventually she recognized three figures, fitting into one.

 Beautiful.

“Steve.” She breathed, “we’re never eating this.”

“We’re not sure how edible it is, anyway.” Steve laughed in relief, embracing her and kissing her temple.

“We are.” Bucky all but jumped on them, wrapping his arms around the two in an awkward yet loving hug, their laughs ringing together in a gracious melody, “It’s not.“

[niniandthenine]

No Attachment -Part 5-

Word count: 2,774

Pairing:  Jongin x reader, 

Warning: This is a exo mafia au that many contain themes some may find uncomfortable. events such as kidnapping, spiking, stockholm syndrome, objectification of a Minor (17) are within.

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'Left, slight right, past the blue door, down one staircase'

The girl was tugged to the left by her wrists, her eyes scanning around the new corridor. 'Left' The girl shut her eyes repeating a long sequence of directions in her head 'Two rights, Left, slight right, past the blue door, down one stairca-'

"Sweetie~?" A smooth purr, closer to her ear than expected, made the girl flinch back and open her eyes to glance up. As their eyes met, Baekhyun's hand enclosed around the girl's opposite shoulder, pulling her towards him as they walked, his other hand still tight around her wrists. "What are you murmuring?" 

A shiver down her spine attempted to shake her body, the haunting weight of the man's fingers around her shoulder causing an automatic response. "...I'm sorry" The next shiver that went down her spine, at the snickered laugh that left Baekhyun's lips, was too strong to suppress. Baekhyun's hand gently released its grip and rose from her shoulder to comb back a few strands of her hair. The girl flinched again, pulling her head in the opposite direction to his hand. "It better not have been the directions back to Jongin's room" Baekhyun's voice whispered right into her ear, causing her breath to catch in her throat. The man snickered and grabbed her opposite shoulder again, keeping her from pulling away from him.

"It's one right, two lefts, up one staircase and the 2nd door on the left-oh no, wait.." As Baekhyun finally leaned back, away from her ear, the girl unconsciously followed with her eyes, "...That's my room" With that, Baekhyun's steps came to a sudden stop and the hand on the girl's shoulder gently swung her around till her back to collide with the wall.

"Since Sehun's gone and Chen hasn't shown up yet, I can take some time to show you the way there" Baekhyun whispered with a  sickly-sweet voice. "And maybe time for a few more things, like.." Baekhyun's voice trailed off teasingly, admiring the mortified look on the girl's face before pressing his lips to the corner of her own "the kinds of things you must have done with Jongin, hmm?" A weight formed in the pit of the girl's stomach. "Uh, I-I already-" Baekhyun didn't let the girl finish before pressing another kiss to her lips. "I think I could do a better job training you... don't you think?"

"Baekhyun, that's enough" A voice called from further down the hall, surprising the girl who looked in the direction it had come from, but didn’t so much as make Baekhyun blink.

Baekhyun scoffed, his breath fanning over the girl's neck as he rolled his eyes "Of course you show up now"

The man who the girl remembered as Chen approached with a small scowl directed towards the other man, not acknowledging the girl rapped between the wall and Baekhyun.  "We still need her relatively innocent so refrain from harassing her too much"

Baekhyun let out a small sigh, opposite to his previously hostile reaction to the other man and pulled the girl from the wall. "Yeah yeah, just take her, will you?" Baekhyun roughly shoved the girl towards the other man, making her stumble forward. Before she could fall, two hands balanced her by the arms, the short distance she had stumbled between Baekhyun and Chen saving her fall.

"If that's all then" Baekhyun turned on his heel, heading back in the direction they had come, leaving the girl with Chen.

"This way" Chen released the girl's arms, directing her in the opposite direction with a gesture. Timidly, the girl nodded and continued to follow Chen down the hall.

Much like the hall she vaguely recalled whilst being carried by Jongin, the hall was a dark cement colour with steel doors divided down the corridor.

"W-what is this place.." the girl couldn't help but mumble in concern, multiple ideas about what they hid behind the steel doors raiding her imagination..

"It's where we keep all of you" The calm voice from beside her, made the girl jump not expecting him to hear her thoughtless comment, let alone confirm one of the horrible answers she had imagined.

"Herd up like little sheep, don't you think?" The chuckle that followed would have been considered quite normal, if not charming, had he not said such a creepy thing before it. The girl shrunk back a little under Chen's laughter, not wanting to know any more of what went on in his head. Silently walking half a step behind the man, the girl tried to push her hair away from her face, the strands tickling her noes and cheeks occasionally as they continued to stubbornly get in the way.

"145. here" Chen's voice broke the girl from her thoughts, his hand reaching back to grab her wrists gently, tugging her towards the door he stopped at. Like the ones she had seen all down the hall, the steel door showed no difference to every other she had seen except the small number engraved above the handle. Chen unlocked the door with a key connected to a large ring with hundreds of identical of keys. The lock unlatched with a rustle clink before Chen pulled the steel door open by the handle.

Gesturing with a small head movement for the girl to go in, Chen fiddled with the keys before looking back at the girl. "You'll be in here till the auction Sehun decides to put you up at. It'll probably be ta couple after the next so you have a while to get used to..." Chen trailed off, making the girl peaked up from under the stray strands of hair that refused to stay tucked behind her ear. The blank stare on Chen's face made the girl blink and start to divert her eyes, not wanting to upset him more than he already appeared to be. But before she could, Chen reached out and grab a hold of her collard shirt. Pulled forward by the action, the girl shut her eyes on instinct waiting for him to hit her, toss her back or something more creepy like Baekhyun went for.

"that's probably annoying" But instead of either, the girl felt the man hold something in front of her eyes. "A-a hairpin..?" The girl stuttered, still in Chen's hold that he seemed oblivious to how rough it was. "Don't let the others seen it" was all he said before dropping the pin into the girl's shirt pocket. Without another word, Chen stepped back into the hallway and closed the steel door without even glance. The rusty metal clink of the lock rung around the small cell.

From the corner of the small bricked in room, she couldn't tell if time was passing slowly as it felt it was or otherwise. The silence left her with her thoughts. Her mind first wandered back to hours before with Jongin. Remembering all the words he had whispered into her ear and where his hands had reached before Baekhyun and Sehun had stormed in- Quickly shaking her head, the girl felt almost disgusted at the first thoughts she had when finally alone. Because she had fallen to sleep, willingly and not, on a few occasion She didn't even know how long it had been since she was first snatched from the 'detective's car. Surely, someone from her class would have noticed her missing by now and had people searching for her. She thought of Jongin before even thinking what was going to become of her. But despite her attempts to divert her thoughts from Jongin and his gentle fingers, soft voice and every moment they had spent together, they wouldn't move aside. Her attachment to the man had grown severely. He was no longer someone she just looked to when she needed damage control but now he was someone who had kissed her and stolen a part of her heart.  Staring down at her bound wrists she fought back the urge to cry fruitlessly.

Whilst only the small hiccups and soft cries filled the room a sharp noise broke slice through the room, leaving only stunned silence.

The rustle click of the lock being unlatched  sent a loud chalky crack echoing through the small enclosure.  The sound suffocated her, echoing in her head over and over.

"I must have heard wrong..."

But the sound still echoed in her mind,long past the time it dissolved into the room, as clear as day. With sweaty palms, the girl cautiously scooted over to the metal door that had been unlocked with no result.

She felt the skin on her knees break a little from the rough cement ground, but her mind was too plagued with the click of the door unlocking and confirming whether she had really lost her mind.

As she stopped before the door, her left hand slowly reached up to rest on the handle,  waiting with sweat to test if it would turn. Worried that her timing would be wrong, the girl put her ear to the door, listening for any footsteps or sign that someone might be behind it. but she heard none. Whether that was because of the thickness of the metal door or if there was no movement on the other side, she had no clue.

"W-where would I even go..?" The girl had only seen parts of what seemed the be the large estate that extended underground and had no idea where an exit would even be. Even with the door unlocked she knew it wouldn't be the only obstetrical to escaping the place.

Despite the caution alarms going off in her head, the girl gently pulled the door open. The hinges creaked painfully loud, making the girl’s whole body freeze in fright for a second. After steadying her breath she pushed the door wide enough for her to slip out.

The eerie concert hall felt larger than before, making the girl look both ways down the hall for some time before even thinking of moving a muscle.

Walking in the direction she had been lead by Chen, the girl constantly glanced over her shoulder and tried to make her steps as light and soundless as possible. Just as she remembered, the hall seemed to go on forever, making her heart go wild in her chest imagining how much longer she would have to endure the eerie silence. Despite that she barely even know where she was going.

The girl approached The first two-way turn that ended the long hall she had been locked in. Looking back, all the mental doors looked so similar that even if she wanted to go back, she wouldn't be able to tell which one she had been inside.

Directions that she had been so memorising surfaced as she looked between the left and right turns. The girl, confident in her memory, turned right, deciding the only way she could have a chance at getting out would be to find her way back to Jongin's room. Following the directions she had memorised 'one right and two lefts' she reached the staircase faster than it had taken her to walk to the end of that hall

Taking a deep breath the girl clutched onto the railing, taking the stairs up from the cement walls and eerie hallways into the nicer upper ground level.

"2nd door on the left..." uttering the last direction the girl stared down the hall before taking a step onto the push corridor rug that ran down the hall with only two doors.

With each step closer she got the second door on the left, her head flooded with doubt again, nagging at her till her feet came to a stop just before the door.

How, why did she even trust Jongin?  The girl rethought the logic in what she was doing, getting a chance to escape and immediately running back to one of her captors.  Why did she blindly make her way back to his room? Because he had helped her a few times? He was still apart of her kidnapping and involved in the mafia despite the affection she felt from him. "Why..why the heck did I come here.." the girl felt another strong breakdown surfacing, staring with the familiar sting at her eyes.

The door she was standing close to opened suddenly, making the girl stumble back slightly. "J-jongin-" As the girl looked up the name caught in her throat. Stepping back again, she shook her head , suddenly remembering the directions she had followed.  

"Don't tell me you really remembered the direction here rather then to Jongin's room" Baekyun grab a hold of the girl's arm, staring down at her darkly. "I can't tell if your stupid for following directions to my room or smart for getting out of your cell"   

Baekhyun let out a deep chuckle, pulling the girl with him back down the hall. "If we're lucky, you really will be thrown over to me"

Instead of being lead back down the stairs Baekhyun took the girl further into the main building. He walked too quickly for her to even be able to look at her surroundings or remember the directions back. Only getting to feel disgusted at the expensive looking area compared to underground where she was stored for the short time.  Stopping suddenly in one of the halls, Baekhyun opens one of two large wooden French doors, pushing her into the room before him. As the girl was lead in further by Baekhyun she noticed the room was occupied .The young,tall looking man sat behind the large oak wooden desk, stopped in the middle of talking to Sehun, Chen and Jongin who turned to look over. not wanting to see the expressions she geussed would be on the other two men’s faces, the girl felt a sting in her chest when her eyes met those of Jongin’s, more so when his eyes slightly narrowed upon seeing her. "Guess who I found outside my door" Baekhyun sung, pushing the girl further into the room with a tight grip, stopping her to stand between Jongin and Baekhyun, in front of the desk and important man who sat behind it.

Upon the girl stopping beside him Jongin quickly shot a glare towards Baekhyun and gently, as if unconsciously, placed a comforting hand on the girl’s forearm. 

Jongin snapped before the man behind the desk even had a chance to speak. "Then why'd you bring her here?! You should have just put her back" Jongin 

"That's not the point, Jongin" Baekhyun hissed back, redirecting his eyes back to the man behind the desk. "Chanyeol, we need to get rid of this girl"  Baekhyun spoke, the man behind the desk didn't respond but only briefly glanced at the girl.

"If she got out of the cell then that's Chen's fault, isn't it?" Jongin argued after seeing the Chanyeol’s conflict. His hand on her lower arm tightened slightly as if reassuring her he was there.

"My fault? I locked the door. How am I supposed to know if she somehow got out?" Chen scoffed before looking at Sehun "Besides, isn't she Sehun's find?"

Sehun heaved a sigh before rubbing his temples with his index finger and thumb. "I think Baekhyun is right, this girl is getting annoying"

A cough from the man behind the desk finally brought their attention forward again. Chanyeol, who seemed to have the most authority, stared at the girl for a moment before finally speaking.

"How did you get out?" The girl hesitated slightly, knowing her answer would sound extremely suspicious. "T-the door just unlocked by it’s self..and it opened.." she hadn't meant for her voice to come out so weak but under the stares of all four mean, cracked. "It unlocked by its self?" Chanyeol looked most utterly unconvinced with her answer,  just she had thought.

"Well, how else would she have gotten out..? You don't seriously think she could have broken out" Jongin defended the girl once again, not only making the girl look at him but the other three men as well.

The short silence was broken when Chen stepped over to Jongin and the girl, shifting everyone's attention over to him. "It's possible. She could have picked the lock" Jongin scoffed at the other "With what?"

The girl flinched as Chen got closer, remembering back to when he had casually grabbed her by the shirt and... Her eyes suddenly widened. she recognised the small scheming smile on the corner of his lip before he plucked out a hairpin from her shirt pocket.

"A hairpin like this would have been perfect"

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I’m sorry this update took so long but I hope that you all enjoy this 5th part. If you have some time please let me know what you think it really helps me and makes me so happy!

@junztar @kimjongninie @heartshapedenchiladas @mononymie @taeskosmos @lovestrucked-again @yoshisbug90 @yanjunnies @ninibears-erigom @velvet-junmyeon 

If you would like to be @’d in future chapters please let me know!

alsoooo I’m sorry Jongin isn't in this much I promise he will be in the next part. 

[straykidsupdate]

Stray Kids Talk Songwriting, Career Goals and Their First U.S. Tour

“Authenticity” is a keyword thrown around a lot more often in K-pop these days. With crossover potential in the foreground, there’s more at stake when it comes to shaking the dismissive notion that it’s “manufactured.” Companies are investing more in idols — not just as performers, but as visionaries of their artistic direction. It just so happens Stray Kids have emerged as a rookie boy band challenging these preconceived notions.

This nine-member group hails from one of Korea’s “Big 3” music agencies, JYP Entertainment. They’ve only been around for a year, and they’ve already hit huge career milestones. After snagging several Rookie of the Year trophies at Korean award shows, they just won their first music show at M Countdown on April 4.

“When we won first place for the first time, we were so happy and thankful towards our Stay,” main rapper Han told Forbes, referring to the group’s fandom. “We thought to ourselves that we would need to work even harder now to show an even better side to our Stay. One memory we have from that day is when our win was first announced, Seungmin and I cried a lot.”

Part of what sets Stray Kids apart is their heightened emphasis on self-composition. While it’s increasingly common for idols to pen their own songs, you’ll be hard-pressed to find a Stray Kids track that doesn’t feature a member in the liner notes. They even have their own in-house songwriting team: 3RACHA, featuring members Bang Chan, Changbin, and Han.

“We’re given a lot of freedom,” said Bang Chan, the Aussie leader of the group. “It’s mostly what we want to speak. It is our lyrics and our melodies. So we would write all our songs. We finish a song, and we would show it to our big boss, JYP. And he would give feedback on it. And yeah, it’s beautiful teamwork.”

The fate of a K-pop group’s lineup is often pre-determined by top-down management, but Stray Kids are presented as having an unprecedented level of autonomy. Auteurship is in the details, from Bang Chan hand-picking the members to his handwriting forming the group’s logo.Their discography — which has rapidly grown since their March 2018 debut — is representative of K-pop’s genre agnosticism. One minute, they’ll throw a bit of rap-rock your way. Next, they’ll hit hard with a well-timed EDM drop. They excel at blood-pumping bangers like latest single “MIROH,” but they can get more pensive on songs like “Grow Up.” While they have built a sound around a razor-edged intensity, they still make room for playful and light-hearted fare like “Get Cool.”Despite the diversity of their catalogue, there’s always a few song components they have to keep in mind when constructing a track. “BPM is very important especially because we are the ones who are performing on stage,” said Bang Chan. “Another important factor is the song structure. In my opinion, the song structure represents the flow of the whole song, so depending on the mood of the song, the song structure is quite important.”He’s not kidding. Take their third single, “My Pace.” The flow is disjointed by plenty of vocal breaks, speeding up just as soon as it slows down again. It’s a delicate balancing act, the way they anchor the hooks while keeping the listener on their toes by switching up the rhythm. But this temporal shapeshifting has a larger purpose. It feels conceptually poignant on this track, where the lyrics explore the theme of going through life at your own speed.

“Honestly, having the opportunity to even write songs for the team is a great big honor,” the 21-year-old leader said. “But because we still have a long way to go, we hope to become songwriters who can inspire others and give energy and hope to people in need.”

Stray Kids are already off to an impressive start, wrapping up the three-EP I Am series in less than a year. The group threaded together a whole narrative cycle across the albums I Am Not, I Am Who, and I Am You. Their world-building began in the dystopian “District 9,” where they escaped authoritarian uniformity to forge their own paths.

I Am is fundamentally a bildungsroman brought to life by a group in their teens and early 20s, taking the listener on a journey to self-discovery. “The message of I Am Not is realizing that I don’t feel like myself,” Bang Chan previously explained during 3RACHA’s “pre-talk” with JYP. “I Am Who throws a question, ‘if I am not myself, who am I?’ As for I Am You, it sounds like we made a conclusion. But in fact, we have yet to find out about our identity.”

That lack of resolution makes sense because it reflects the group’s own transitional state of entering into both adulthood and celebrity status.

“While I was going through school, I would think, ‘What’s my dream? Do I really have to do this? My parents expect me to do this but is this what I want?’” Bang Chan said. “Honestly, I haven’t found the answer yet. I still don’t know who I am. But I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who thinks like this, right? I just really want to reach out to people who are having the same problem like me — well, not problem. It’s not a problem, but I guess [people] who are going through the same thing. This is the reason we wanted to express that in the I Am series.”

Naturally, these themes also bleed into their follow-up album series, which kicked off with March’s Clé 1: MIROH. In particular, “19” — with lyrics solely written by 18-year-old Han — paints vignettes that dig deeper into his hesitations about entering adulthood.

But the connections between the I Am and Clé series go beyond shared thematic content. “In the music video for ‘I Am You,’ we were looking down at a maze-like city from the rooftop [in District 9],” Changbin said. “This city’s name is MIROH, and MIROH is our new world.”

Stray Kids are practically building their own cinematic universe, and their latest album teaser for Clé 2: Yellow Wood — which will be released on June 19 — could be mistaken for a movie trailer. Note that the setting is in an elevator, which brings to mind their pre-debut single, “Hellevator.” Visual callbacks to their previous work are part of the fabric of their ongoing narrative.

“It is a bit challenging,” said Bang Chan. “But when we write our songs, we do think about what we’ve written before and how we need to continue off of that and what we need to think about writing on next. It’s okay, it’s not that difficult. But we do need to think about [it].”

When they’re not dreaming up dystopian cities, they’re taking their tagline “Stray Kids everywhere, all around the world” seriously. Just last month, they headed out on their first U.S. tour, making sold-out stops in Newark, Houston, and Los Angeles. Come July, they’ll take their Unveil tour to Europe. “Through these stages and performances, we want to be able to show later on more people in more cities what we’re made of,” main dancer Hyunjin said.

On May 17, they played a show at the Pasadena Civic Auditorium that was simultaneously characterized by the sensory onslaught of their adrenaline-inducing performances and the vulnerable affability of their frequent ments, or speaking segments. Their raucous spin on K-pop maximalism literally left the 3,000-seat venue shook, as Stays rattled the balcony in their excitement.

But the nonet also made use of the relatively intimate space, placing more emphasis on fan engagement than your average concert. By the time the evening rolled around to their goodbye talk, the members had some heartfelt words for Stay. “I always read our Stays’ letters, and you guys are always afraid of the future,” Han said on stage. “I just want to tell you [to] believe in yourself and just don’t look back. We are on your side.” It was a moment that captured Stray Kids’ penchant for speaking about issues faced by young people.

“We’re always showing and sharing our own music,” the youngest member I.N said over the phone. “We want to be known as a group where we can give good emotions and influences to people around us.”

(source)

[glknight]

HOROSHIBA HORRIFICA: A Horror themed Magical Girl property

Synopsis: Nera Valakuzo is not the most skilled of the Witch Apprentices in the city of Horoshiba. She’s barely able to ride her broom, she gets easily confused when trying to remember the right incantations and her natural clumsiness makes her potion making skills something to be desired. But her eagerness to learn and Can Do spirit more than makes up for that.

But it isn’t until she accidentally finds the most forbidden tome in Witch Society’s library that she learns that she’ll need more than just motivation. Because when an ancient prophecy is fulfilled, she will need the power of the Horrifica Magnificarum and some new friends to stop the powerful evil that she accidentally released before it takes over the world!

Background: Growing up, I had a lot of things I was really into. Horror is easily my most obvious fandom, as I still try to create things in that genre to this day. But when it came to anime, I was actually a fan of a genre that most boys (particularly straight boys like myself) were always told by others our own age that we’re not supposed to like: Magical Girls. Magic Knight Rayearth needs to be treated with more fondness, Creamy Mami was a bittersweet show, and Sailor Moon was always awesome, To this day, I still say that both Sailor Mercury and Sailor Jupiter are Best Senshi. And I still say that if you want to know about what modern anime’s like, you have to watch certain shows: K-On! for Moe for example, Evangelion for melodrama, and most importantly for this project, PRETTY CURE for how modern shows handle character empowerment.

Pretty Cure is easily one of the best Anime franchises NO ONE here in the United States cares to think or really even talk about. Cute girls in costumes kicking bad guy butt? Come on! That’s like saying “here’s a great pizza from your favorite pizza place, and I’ve got your favorite ice cream for dessert”. It’s just something that most Anime fans would not turn down in a heartbeat. And then on top of that, you add “Oh yeah, and they’re played like actual superheroes and not just poseable dolls, with super strength, martial arts skills and the same level of high intensity fight scenes as some of the best Shounen series”?

JESUS CHRIST, WAS THE ONLY THING GETTING IN THE WAY OF THIS SHOW BEING BROUGHT OVER WAS BECAUSE THE HEROES ARE ALL GIRLS?!

Yes, and that’s an absolute shame.

So, after about 30 years of denying my interest in the genre, my heart started telling me “You know, since you’re trying to be honest about things you actually like, maybe you should, you know, be honest about your taste in Anime by working on something you actually love”. And that’s what Horoshiba Horrifica is. My love of two genres: Magical Girls and Horror (because let’s face it, I have to stay on brand for Horror/Fantasy/Sci Fi Weirdness).

So, mixing Pretty Cure with the iconic manga/anime horror property GeGeGe no Kitaro, I reached the blend I wanted that eventually became known as Horoshiba Horrifica.

But enough of me talking about WHY I’m creating H2. What is this series about?

SETTING: Horoshiba Horrifica’s about a Witch Apprentice named Nera Valakuzo that lives in the city of Horoshiba, home to Witches, Demons, Werewolves, Vampires, Phantoms and Humans who, after a millennia of co-habitation, look almost identical to humans except for maybe one or two details. Nera is, for all intents and purposes, a klutzy girl with a thirst for knowledge and more than a little energy. With her Frankenyan familiar, Francesca Nyancy Porohezora (or Poro for short) by her side trying to convince her to stay out of trouble, Nera is unable to turn a good tome down. And after finding out there’s a SECRET book she had never heard about, she goes and gets her hands on it.

It’s not her fault that her finding the tome is part of an Ancient Prophecy. And that said prophecy would unleash the exact Evil Queen that the Unity of Six Dominions has been trying to erase from History for the past 1000 years.

After unleashing the Dark Queen Zarafine back into the world, Nera must now use the power of the Horrifica Magnificarum to find the other descendants of the Heroes of the Unity that trapped Zarafine in the pages of the tome before darkness and ruin falls upon the world again.

THE CHARACTERS: 

-Nera: Klutzy bookworm that is always trying to improve herself. With a bit of a sweet tooth, and more than a little gumption, Nera is always working every day to do better than the day before. As the descendant of the Witch that captured Zarafine, she is the Magical Girl of Light, Horrifica Magi.

-Poro: When every Witch becomes an Apprentice, they receive a familiar. Some receive dogs, others receive regular cats. When it came to Nera, she bungled the procedure so much, she received a Frankenstein amalgamation she gave a really long name to, so everyone calls her Poro. Like all familiars, Poro is able to talk. Unlike most other familiars, Poro can fly and has unusual strength for something her size, being able to carry a full sized adult. Being Nera’s familiar, she is naturally trying to keep her out of trouble, and is more than a little high strung for her efforts.

-Ulya: Calm and collected, the school beauty Ulya is the envy of every other student. Naturally graceful, with some of the highest marks in the school and a legion of fans, Ulya is always the center of attention. Which usually gets in the way of her time with her girlfriend. As the descendant of the Vampire that captured Zarafine, she is the Magical Girl of Night, Horrifica Bram.

-Yagi: Formerly the quiet type, Yagi was the kind of girl who would start off the journey for self improvement in certain anime titles. With an overbearing mother, an overly dramatic sister, and a part-time job at a pet store, Yagi’s schedule is usually filled to the brim on a day to day basis. Imagine her surprise when she’s pulled into the battle against Evil... As the descendant of the Werewolf that captured Zarafine, she is the ferocious Magical Girl of the Wild, Horrifica Howl.

-Vevi: Due to a life of illness, Vevi is not the most athletic of girls, instead choosing a life of books. With dreams of being a writer one day, Vevi voraciously reads any and every book she can get her hands on. Despite seeming dispassionate, the eternally sleepy bookworm can and WILL talk your ear off about any topic (and we do mean ANY topic). As the descendant of the Phantom that captured Zarafine, she is the Magical Girl of Gates, Horrifica Geist.

-Rona: Ever the troublemaker, Rona is the oldest of her siblings but never able to stand out from them. Mischievous and a little antagonistic, the diminutive devil may have a tendency to think or speak before she acts, but never means to actually cause any real harm. As the descendant of the Demon that captured Zarafine, she is the Magical Girl of Fire, Horrifica Inferno.

-Sen: In the same grade as Nera, Sen is the boy that everyone just seems to like. Good grades, good at sports, good at pretty much *EVERYTHING* he sets his mind to, Sen is just competent in every category all around. It’s no wonder that Nera has fallen kinda hard for him. But the eternal thorn in her side in this matter is Sen’s twin sister...

-Yun: Considered the monster of the School, Yun watches over her brother like a hawk in a bid to protect him. If you ask her why, she’ll tell you she doesn’t really know. But no matter what she says, the sadistic smile on her face when she scares people away from him tells you all need to know. But there’s a really good reason why the pair are like this...

-Zarafine: The Dark Queen that was sealed away before. After discovering a means to conquer several realms, she was *THIS CLOSE* to becoming the Lady of Darkness when the Heroes of the Unity put a stop to her plans. Now free once again, she is gathering her power and forces to start a new campaign of terror.

And with that, the initial setup for Horoshiba Horrifica is complete. If you enjoyed it and would like to see me continue working on it, please feel free to let me know your thoughts. I just really want to make this the best I can.

[thegizka]

What’s In A Name?

New to the superhero business, the Shazam family has a lot to learn if they're going to make this vigilante stuff work. Step 1: Figure out secret identities and hero names.

Written for Writer's Month 2019 Day 6: Kids.

Note: I do not own these characters.

Read it on Ao3.

“Okay,” Freddy began, turning to face his siblings after checking the security of the bedroom door.  “If we want to do this superhero thing right, we have to establish some ground rules.  I hope you brought paper to take notes because there will be a quiz at the end of this.”

“Wait, seriously?”  Eugene’s eyes were panicked as he glanced up from his computer screen.

“Of course not.”  Billy rolled his eyes.

“Besides, if you did write anything down, we’d have to burn it afterwards so no supervillains could trace it back to our secret identities.”  Freddy smiled sarcastically.  He was really laying on the dry humor, a sure sign that he was nervous.  He was the closest thing to a superhero expert they had, even though he’d only been in direct contact with the superhero world for a few weeks.  It wasn’t like there was any pressure to keep his family safe or anything.

“That’s a good place to start,” Billy jumped in.  As the only other family member with marginally more exposure to superheroing, he was also partially responsible for the success of this meeting.  “Let’s talk secret identities.”

“The number one superheroing rule,” Freddy announced, “is never tell anyone your secret identity.”  He looked pointedly at Darla.

“But what if it’s someone who can help you, like a teacher or a police officer?” she asked innocently.  “Rosa says we’re not supposed to lie.”

“Leaving out your name isn’t lying,” Mary reassured her.

“But you can’t make friends unless you tell people your name.”

“Well you’ll have a superhero name.  You can use that.”

“Do I get to pick my own name?” she asked, an eager shine in her eyes.

Billy found everyone looking at him.

“Uh, I think so?”

“Great!  I’m going to be Princess Purple Sparkle Rainbow.”  Darla beamed.

“How can you be both purple and rainbow?” Eugene asked.

“Anything is possible through positive thinking and imagination.”

Someday they’d have to collect Darla Wisdom and sell it as a book.  They’d make a fortune.

“That name is too long.  No one will be able to remember it, not even you,” Freddy declared.  Mary shot him a warning look.

“I will,” their youngest sister declared confidently, “and all of my new friends will, too.”

“Pedro,” Billy said, eager to avoid the potential of an argument, or worse--Darla being sad.  “What’s your name going to be?”

The quietest member of the family just shrugged.

“The Jolly Green Giant,” Eugene suggested while he tapped away at his keyboard.

“That’s the veggie man.”  Freddy dismissed it with a nearly offended frown.

“The Shield?” Billy offered.

“I think that one’s already taken.”

“Wait,” Mary commanded, and instinctively they all followed the eldest’s lead.  “Should we work with a theme?  We are a team, after all.”

“The Justice League doesn’t have a theme,” Freddy pointed out, “or the Teen Titans, the Justice Society, the Doom Patrol, the-”

“Okay, okay,” Mary conceded even though half of those teams sounded made up to her.

“But those teams aren’t family,” Darla said softly.

“She’s right,” Pedro agreed in his quiet, honest manner.

They digested these truths in silence for a while.

“What about something Greek?” Mary suggested.  “Our powers come from Greek legend.”

“Mercury is technically Roman,” Eugene clarified.

“Solomon’s from the Bible, isn’t he?” Billy added.

“Besides,” Freddy continued, “a theme based on the source of our power could give supervillains a clue about how to defeat us.”

“Well how do other heroes come up with their names?” Mary asked.

“I don’t know.  My knowledge of superheroes starts after they’ve already come up with their costume and name.  And even if I had tried to figure out some of their secret identities like a total nerd, there’s no way for me to verify whether I’m right and ask them.  I mean, it’s not like I have a way in to superhero society, such as, I don’t know, a brother who knows Superman or something.”  He looked pointedly at Billy.

“Dude, just transform and introduce yourself next time you fly to Metropolis.”

“How can I introduce myself when I don’t have a superhero name?”

“Yeah, are we going to figure that out right now or not?” Eugene demanded.  “Because there’s a Twitch stream going live in twenty minutes that I don’t want to miss.”

“Well Billy already has a name,” Pedro observed.

“Right!”  Darla beamed.  “Because when he said ‘Say my name’ we said Shaz-”

“Shh!” everyone hissed.  Mary covered her sister’s mouth before she could finish the word.

“Not inside, remember?  We don’t want to blow the roof off.”

“Sorry,” she sighed.  “I got too excited.”

“It’s okay,” Mary reassured her.  “We just have to be careful.”

“It’s a bit dumb not being able to say your name,” Freddy mused.

“Hey, I didn’t choose to make it like that.”

“Yeah I know.  That’s why we should come up with an alternative name so we can actually communicate on the job and stuff.  Ooh, wait a second!” Freddy cried, face lighting up with that look he always got when he discovered a new and interesting fact.  “I think I have an idea…”

-----

That night they tried out the new nicknames.  While Rosa and Viktor were enjoying a rare night out, they hit the streets to stop what crime they could.  Of course, whenever it was easy to sneak away and do superhero stuff, there was never anything notable to do.  They helped stop a car chase after the first few blocks, cleaned up a park, and adjusted one family’s TV antenna so they could watch Phillies games in perfect clarity.

“We’d better head back soon,” Maelstrom suggested, trying to check the time on the watch she habitually wore, but it had disappeared when she’d transformed.

“Can we get ice cream on the way back?” Lightning asked with hope in her eyes.

“Not if we didn’t bring money with us.”

“We don’t need money.”  Vortex shrugged.  “Bil- Uh, Storm and I discovered during his early days that when you ask nicely, people are willing to give superheroes all sorts of things for free.”

“That sounds like stealing.”  Tornado frowned.

“It’s not if they willingly give it to you,” Storm argued.

“If I asked Tech Stop for a new PS4, do you think they’d give one to me?” Thunder wondered.

“We are not using our new roles to ask for free stuff!” Maelstrom said firmly.  “Our main purpose is to protect and help people, not abuse their trust in us.  Besides, how would you explain a new PS4 to Rosa and Viktor?”

“Sh, no secret identity clues!” Vortex hissed.  Maelstrom just rolled her eyes.

“So we’re not stopping for ice cream?”  Lightning’s expression was dangerously close to a pout.

“I’ll buy you ice cream,” Storm promised.  “I brought some allowance along just in case we’d need it.”

“Thank you big brother!”  She zoomed over to him and gave him a big hug.

“Lightning, we agreed to use hero names only,” Vortex sighed.  “We can’t give hints of our secret identities!”

“You sound paranoid,” Thunder warned.

“It’s the number one rule!”

“I can’t remember everyone’s names yet,” Lightning admitted.

“Don’t worry, I’ll help you memorize them,” Maelstrom promised.

“If we want to grab ice cream, we should go now,” Tornado quietly reminded them.

“We’d better hurry!” Lightning cried, ready to save time by flying there directly.

“Hang on, I have to get my money out.  SHAZAM!”

In a flash of lightning, Billy replaced Shazam Storm.  He dug into his pants pockets, eventually passing a wad of crumpled bills to Maelstrom.  With another shout and another flash, he was once again a superhero.

“Okay, let’s go.”

“Maybe I’ll get butterscotch, or chocolate chip, or birthday cake!  There are so many yummy flavors, I don’t know how I’ll decide!”

Lightning continued chattering on the way to the ice cream shop.  The late-night workers looked a bit shell-shocked when six large and brightly dressed heroes stepped into the shop talking and teasing each other like children.  Maelstrom tried to keep them on task, but Lightning kept changing her order, Vortex was shooting irrelevant questions at the overwhelmed workers, and Storm was nervously calculating whether they’d have enough to pay.  Twenty minutes (and a few photos) later, they poured back out onto the street, sweet treats in hand.

“Home?” Tornado suggested.

“Race you!” Thunder dared, already taking off.  The others released surprised shouts and followed.  Lightning, normally the fastest of them, trailed a step behind.

“Hang on!” she cried around her spoon.  “I don’t want to drop my ice cream!”

x

I tried finding comics-based names for the Shazam family, but only Billy, Mary, and Freddy have been around long enough to have options. Wikipedia mentioned Shazam Thunder, Shazam Lighning and Shazam Strong for Eugene, Darla, and Pedro respectively, though I'm not sure where those came from. I liked Shazam Thunder and Shazam Lightning, and since their symbol is the giant light-up lightning bolt on their chests, I decided to go with storm-based hero names for the squad.

[professorpalmarosa]

Weird Nutmeg Dream: The Chris Chan Escape Room

This is not the first time I have chronicled a weird dream brought on by diffusing Nutmeg Essential Oil. If you diffuse the correct amount, you increase your chances of having a lucid dream...or at least something fun and interesting.

Too much, and you’ll end up with dreams about bees building hives on the other side of your window or psychic hipsters with man-buns stealing your identity so you’ll kill everyone he hates with your brainwaves.

Wednesday night, I had a real doozy...

In this dream, one of my old high school friends had just turned 30. To celebrate, they wanted to get a big group together to play a brand new room at an escape room company close to my city’s amusement park. I was eager to play for a number of reasons:

I love escape rooms. I played my first one in 2016 and have been hooked ever since.

I have played two escape rooms at this facility already. Their rooms don’t have the ambient lighting, expensive sets, and mood music like my favorite place does; but their puzzles tend to be trickier (and honestly, sometimes pretty funny).

The engineer who owns the company and designs the rooms is a very nice guy. Once you finish a room, he loves to nerd out and explain how he constructed the room, how the puzzles work, etc. He also has a cool “replay room” where you can watch your gameplay. Sometimes, he’ll slow it down. Other times, he’ll speed it up and play Yakety Sax from the Benny Hill Show.

This was a brand new room. Only two groups had beaten the room so far, but no one had successfully unlocked the “special bonus ending” yet. That probably thrilled me more than anything else.

My group arrives on time and we’re all eager to find out what the theme of the room is. I try to weasel some information out of the owner, but he’s being uncharacteristically mum about all of this. That’s when our “guide” steps out to greet us.

He’s a chubby fellow dressed in a blue and red striped rugby shirt, a pair of blue jeans with a stain near his fly, a pair of thick glasses, an amethyst high school ring…and something around his neck that gives away what the theme of the room will be. My friends are confused and more than a little grossed out by the stain, but it’s all I can do to hold in my nervous giggling.

‘Oh my god,’ I realize. ‘It’s a Chris Chan escape room.’

For those unfamiliar with who Chris Chan is, Christine Weston Chandler (formerly Christopher/Christian Weston Chandler) is a high-functioning autistic internet personality famous for creating Sonichu: a hybrid between Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu. She occasionally releases comics; but nowhere near as frequently as she once did. This is due to stress, repeated harassment from online trolls, financial problems, and a deteriorating mental state due to all of the aforementioned.

Her life is pretty much what would happen if the Truman Show were real…if Truman was autistic and the show was 100% guest-written by internet trolls. Everything she does is chronicled by “Christorians” and broken up into sagas. Sagas are typically categorized by personal life events, failed romantic relationships with (sometimes real, sometimes fake) women, and whatever troll/trolling group is harassing her at present.

As a side note, I know that Christine’s preferred pronouns are now she/her. When speaking about her in the present tense, I will use those. However, since (1) this room dealt with Chris almost a decade before the transition was announced and (2) even Christine herself tends to treat the past Chris as a separate entity (she even kicks him in the nuts in the Sonichu comics, if I remember correctly); I’ll be using he/him for the purposes of the dream. This room was designed around Chris, not Christine.

I don’t have an account on the Kiwi Farms, nor have I ever contributed any articles or attempted to contact Chris. However, I’ve been following Chris’s antics for nearly ten years and fancy myself to be a bit of a closeted amateur Christorian.

No one in my group knew this and it was about to become relevant.

“Hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all teen ages!” Fake-Chris greeted us. I’m trying my best not to crack up because I recognize that quote. I know where this is going. The actor does not disappoint. “My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I’m here, and y’all are there!”

My poor friends look like they’ve just crash landed onto an alien (Little Big) planet. They have no clue what hell they’ve just unleashed, but it only get crazier from there. I won’t go into the full specifics of what the actor said—again, this was a dream and not reality. Some of the details are hazy now that I’m awake—but I’ll go ahead and tell you what the general premise for the Chris Chan escape room was:

The Sonichu medallion around Chris’s neck was a copy. He wanted to give the original to a “sweetheart” he was courting online, but he lost it somewhere in his room. Just to humor the actor, I asked who the sweetheart was.

Fake-Chris’s face lit up with glee, probably because a real girl was talking to him. “Blanca Weiss,” he tells me giddily. “Blanca’s real. Yeah. I talked to her!”

By now, most of my friends are having second thoughts about entering that room. The actor has creeped out most of the ladies in my party, as well as my gender nonconforming friend who is really uncomfortable when people make comments about their chest. They haven’t had top surgery yet and it’s a very sensitive subject.

There was one more twist for the plot of the room: Chris believed one of us wasn’t being “true and honest” and was, in fact, a troll from the internet. This brings me back to the “special bonus ending” I mentioned earlier. Each group of players would have one troll among them. This person would have a slightly different objective from the other players.

All of us were tasked with finding the Sonichu medallion, but the “troll” player would need to:

Go undetected by Chris and the other players for the entirety of the game.

Find the Sonichu medallion.

Steal the Sonichu medallion from the rest of the party.

Leave the room before the hour was up.

If the troll could successfully do this, they would be rewarded with a free full booking of another room. Escape rooms tend to run anywhere from $15 to $25 per person in my city, so that’s about a $250 value! I don’t care who the hell the troll is in my group is. I’m not going to dox them because I want the free game.

In an attempt to convince my wary friends to move forward with the game, I reassured them that I’d probably be able to catch most of the inside jokes in the room. “I know my Christory, guys.” They looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language. “I know this stuff! We can do this!”

Unfortunately, my enthusiasm and can-do attitude bit me in the ass. Not only had I outed myself as some kind of online weirdo to my friends, but Fake-Chris proceeded to hit on me for most of the game. Initially, he tried his best to give every player an equal amount of interaction. I guess he noticed the other people in the room were uncomfortable and I seemed “nice.” I was asked multiple times if I was “boyfriend-free.” (Spoiler alert: I am, but that’s because I’m a super choosy and super, super gay.)

I was right. My Christory knowledge came into play multiple times during the game play. There were puzzles based on:

The “Gitars of Fail” (Guitar Hero guitars Chris customized after Sonichu and Meatwad from Aqua Teen Hunger Force, just to name a couple)

The Sailor Moon poster Chris used to look at every day to reaffirm his “straightness”

Rearranging the members of the Chaotic Combo in chronological order of their first appearance in the Sonichu comics. Their Amibos were spread around the room and needed to be placed in that order, otherwise a box with a magnetic lock wouldn’t open.

The Orange Fanta cans. If you don’t already know what those are for, you DON’T want to know.

The Sonic Totem

The Pixelblock Heart Torch

The “Yep! I’m on TV!” DVD.

The “Wall of Originals” custom Pokémon cards.

Chris & the Hedgehog Boys. My guy pal Patrick had to sing a rendition of “So Need a Cute Girl” and it was godawful.

Finding the one game in Chris’s massive collection where one of the characters was incorrectly colored (Sonic Boom, which Chris doesn’t own. Chris boycotted that game and even pepper sprayed a Gamestop employee).

A scavenger hunt inside the Manchester High School Year 2000 Yearbook. We had to look at every gal pal.

Having to pull half a key out of Officer Nasty and another half out of Kimmi: Chris’s inflatable sex dolls.

A DDR Mat that (once the four combination locks were unlocked) opened a portal to CWCVille. The four codes were SONICHU, ROSECHU, NAITSIRHC, and CLYDECASH.

One of my friends found the Sonichu medallion inside the CWCville portal. It was hidden inside an empty jug of OxyClean. I heard several cases of “oh thank Christ” muttered among my friends. I could tell they were having fun in here, but were ready to leave.There was just one problem:

Someone had to give the medallion back to Fake-Chris and none of my friends wanted to talk to him.

The clock was running out and Fake-Chris had become increasingly paranoid. “Aw, come on!” he kept whining, sweating and panting as he made grabby hands for the medallion.

“Okay,” I told my friends as I held out my hand. “I know none of you want to do it. Give me the medallion. I’ll take care of this.” My friend handed over the medallion without a second thought, but I didn’t head toward the actor.

I headed toward the door. I was the troll all along.

[meggannn]

(based on your previous ask) do you mind if I ask how you feel about lok? is there a general consensus if it's good or bad? youre really insightful and just wanted to know if there were any major issues you had with it

yeah sure, i’ll do my best. if you want a quick answer to your question, here is a link to some of my other korra posts where i say pretty much the same thing as i do here, just in fewer words. cause this post will be mostly an unhappy summary of my experience watching the show. this post will contain spoilers, and disclaimer, i am a really biased, disappointed asshole, so i’ll just admit that now. 

short answer: i liked the concept of lok more than the product we got. a lot of that is because you had a physically buff brown wlw protagonist written mostly by cishet white men and, as you can imagine, it wasn’t handled great. when i think of lok now i tend to fluctuate between bittersweet nostalgia and quiet, simmering rage.

if you don’t care about the show summary, skip at the middle paragraph break down to my tldr.

so for those who don’t know, LOK was really my first “big” fandom on tumblr. when it was announced, a bunch of ATLA purists were already hating on it because 1) brown woman, 2) it was unrealistic to go from ATLA’s technology to streampunk in 70 years, and 3) it wasn’t ATLA, basically. it was my first big interest that i got to participate in as it was airing, and i was really excited about it. i defended it, i wrote meta, i liveblogged, i wrote tons of fic and spammed theories/wants before the damn show even had a release date. all that is to say, i was Invested, and i believed in it before i even saw it. people called me a bnf, i’m not sure if that’s true, but i did gain a lot my followers in my first few years on tumblr by posting korra stuff. a lot of them – hello – i think are still around today (i’m not certain how all the video games hasn’t scared them off yet)

i should say at this point that my opinion of LOK the show has been really wrapped up in the ugly stain left by the fanbase. korra the character has been the subject of tons of racist, misogynistic criticism since the moment we saw her back; when she showed up on screen as a proud young woman who fought with authority and stood up for herself, that was the nail in the coffin for her reputation. i agreed that she had a bit of growing up to do, because ATLA/LOK have always been stories about coming of age and maturing, but i disagreed strongly with this notion that she deserved to be “humbled,” which is what a lot of fans were looking for.

the overall consensus on if it’s “good” depends on who you ask. most people agree that ATLA is better overall: it was better plotted because it benefited from more writers in the room and more episodes to flesh out the world. opinions on LOK specifically range based a lot on their opinions of the K/orra/sami pairing, if they were involved in or what side they were on in any of the fandom wank, and also just complete random chance.

i’ll go more in depth into my ‘history’ with the show below, but i just wanted to mention that all the while the show was airing, korra was being hit with waves of criticism by so-called fans for basically being a confident brown woman who were calling for her to learn her place, respect her elders, etc. another common theme was fandom’s brilliant fucking idea that asami, a light-skinned feminine non-bending woman who was more polite and reserved than korra, would’ve made a better avatar. because you know why. (korra was often described as brutal, rough, unsophisticated, next to pretty, perfect asami. and asami is a fine character, to be clear, but that’s what she was – fine. nothing really stands out about her, which is a fault of the writing, because she had a lot of potential too.) so anyway all of this did sour my mood toward engaging with other fans outside my friend circle.

–

it was around maybe the middle of book 1 that i realized the writing for the show was simpler than what i was expecting – not that it was childish, which it was (because it was written for children, i understood that), but i felt like the plot meandered and the twists came out of nowhere. it felt like they were making it up as they were going, and it opened threads it didn’t answer. one of the biggest threads was the equalist revolution, which was a very sensitive topic that got jettisoned when the leader was revealed to be a fraud, and that devalued the entire movement in an instant. really disappointing, because i was looking forward to seeing that addressed. for a lot of people, this was a dealbreaker, and they started walking. i stuck with it, but loosely.

book 2 aired, focusing on the spiritual world and some really cool history. it still suffered a lot from awkward b-plots and loose threads it didn’t know how to tackle. korra lost her memory and then regained it 2 episodes later with no consequences, mako flip-flopped between korra and asami because bryke don’t know how to write teenage romances without making it a love triangle, and at some point bolin kissed a girl against her will and they didnt acknowledge that at all? i honestly don’t remember. anyway at the end of book 2, even though korra saves the day and prevents the world from descending into darkness for ten thousand years, due to events beyond her control, korra loses the spiritual connection that ties her to all of the previous avatars – aang, roku, kyoshi, wan, everyone. and people hit the fucking ceiling. “korra’s not a real avatar if she lost her connection to the old ones! that’s the entire point of the cycle! this show is bullshit, it’s not canon anymore!” (the entire point that finale demonstrated that korra’s power alone was enough to save the world and she didn’t need anyone else. but people found that ~unrealistic~ i guess). as you can imagine, being a fan of LOK is starting to get a little tiring by now.

books 3-4 is where the korra haters got to love the show again, because they were both straight-up torture porn. after everything she did saving the world, this is the arc where korra got beat down, tortured, dragged into the dirt, swallowed and spat back out. book 3 is a lot of people’s favorites because it was the first book that felt fully plotted out before it was put on air, which is why i enjoyed it too. but for me it was difficult to see a girl, whose identity revolved around being the avatar after being raised and sheltered to think it was all she was good for, effectively abandon her life and even her name by the beginning of book 4 because the events of book 3 were that traumatizing for her. somehow this was character development. we were encouraged to stick with it because we hoped korra would find herself again. and she did, sorta.

but it makes me furious that people who had quit in books 1-2 came back during 3 because they heard these books were better – aka book 3, the book that featured korra the least, and books 3-4 in which korra got her ass handed to her in some of the hardest fights vs some of the cruelest villains of the series. (nevermind that the book 3 villains suffer from the anime villain curse: they quickly went from “cool character design” to “wait, how does this rando group of villains show up with powers literally no one in the universe has ever heard before?” – questions no one ever answers)

anyway book 4 is a mish-mash of… i’m not sure. i’ve rewatched all the books but i don’t know if i’ll ever touch this one again. the culturally appropriating airbender wannabe, zaheer (a complete rando who somehow masters airbending enough to fly, which was a huge middle finger to airbending masters aang and tenzin for no reason) a guy who literally tortured korra one season before and put her in a wheelchair, is the one who the writers send korra to for her spiritual awakening that lets her save the day. not tenzin or jinora, her spiritual teachers with whom she has positive, healthy relationships – they send her back to her abuser who terrifies and degrades her a bit more before deciding to help. this was a pattern: the writers made both korra and asami face their abusers (in asami’s case, her father) for catharsis instead of gaining peace over their trauma another, healthier way because…. i’m not sure why. there is no reason why. and then there’s the guilt tripping nonsense of asami feeling as if she had to forgive her father, who tried to kill her, because he said he was sorry and sacrificed himself for her in the finale. it’s angst galore, if you like that kind of thing, which i normally do, except this is less angst and more just the writers trying to hammer in torture porn, grimdark, and poor attempts at morally gray nonsense into their finale season.

anyway at the end of her journey, korra, our buff brown woc, learns that she had to suffer to learn how to be compassionate and relate to her enemy. i’m not exaggerating, she literally says that. which is lovely.

–

tldr: i wasted a lot of emotional time and energy into this show and was extremely disappointed when some of the ending’s notes were “you had to suffer to become a better person” and “forgive your abusers/villains because aren’t we all the same in the end?”

but also on a strictly narrative level, LOK also bit off way more than it could chew both emotionally and thematically. it had an amazing premise, but it was not committed to

utilizing the steampunk genre to its best potential in the bending world (after the creativity in the rest of the worldbuilding, the LOK series finale was literally fighting a giant robot – seriously?)

giving its hero the respect and character arc she deserved. and i don’t say that because i think korra had no growing up to do in b1, she did, but she didn’t deserve for it to happen like that.

so basically i realized that a lot of the writers that made ATLA great weren’t brought back for LOK, and it showed. i realized that the LOK writers, when they listened to fans, were listening to the fans that whined the loudest, or (more likely, since they plan seasons years before we see them) they thought from the beginning that it was a good idea for korra to go through years’ worth of pain just to be spat out a humbler, “better” person

the reason i told you all that about me defending LOK in the beginning is because i need you to understand that i believed in LOK longer than i probably should’ve. i wanted it to be everything i was expecting in a diverse children’s show with an unorthodox female protaganist. but just because they had a brown wlw heroine doesn’t mean that they deserved to be praised for it when they treated her like garbage.

and korra and asami walk into a beam of light together in the last second of the show and i’m supposed to applaud the writers for their bravery or something