#yeah life is tough when you’re in a great height difference relationship

[starrysnowdrop]

Thinking about the logistics of Hali and Aymeric kabe-don. Both directions are equally difficult

For those who don’t know what kabe-don is, it’s when one person hits the wall with another person in front of the wall, like they are pinning the person to the wall. Basically this:

But yeahhhhhhhhhh, they really can’t do this to each other very well, because uhh well, just look at their height difference.

No, there are other methods that they employ in order to pin their partner down, which I’ll just leave that to y’all’s imaginations. 😉

Thank you so much for the ask @saccharine-azure!! 💖

[burning-omen]

Sub!Logan howlett headcanons

Requested by @panclawman: Would you do some general Sub!Logan Howlett headcanons x male reader?

(Note: fuck yeah, perfect timing. Happy Valentine’s Day)

I’ve been saying this man is a sub for YEARS

No one believes me

But you’re an intellectual

You know what’s up

Okay onto the headcanons

Logan is a tough looking bastard, he has a reputation of being absolutely brutal in battle. So people tend to think he tops

But no he just wants to be HELD

When he would hook up with people they always figured he was a top, so they never really gave him the choice to bottom

Now he has a fuck ton of experience in being a dominant top and but none in being submissive.

Then he meets you and your amazing and he also wants you to rail him

After dating for a while he figured you were going to have sex at some point. He’d already decided that he definitely wanted to be with you for the rest of your life so he had to tell

Or pretend to be a top for the entirety of your relationship

Yeah no, that’d probably kill him

So he told you

Was nervous as hell about it and ready to sprint at the first sign of rejection

And then you said, “I know.”

The fuck you mean “you know.”????

You told him that at first you did think he was a top, then as your relationship progressed it became increasingly clear that he was very, very submissive

Was pissed for a little while but you just gave him a smooch and told him you were sorry.

His first time bottoming was a whole different experience, and not entirely what he expected.

All he’s ever seen of dominant people(including himself) is that they’re just assholes to anyone that’s into it.

But then again he’s never been in a long lasting relationship so he’s very under experienced in that area.

Okay no more emotions

Praise him for everything, he has no clue what he’s doing and needs to be told if he’s doing good or bad.

He’s easily embarrassed and his embarrassment can very quickly turn him off. So like I said, PRAISE HIM!

He’s not very adventurous, he likes to keep everything in the bedroom because if someone to ever walk in on him he’d simply have to murder them.

It is what it is.

He’s loves being marked

Hickeys, bites, bruises, anything. He knows they’ll be gone the next day and it pisses him off if he didn’t get to see them beforehand.

Despite what he tells literally every person he has ever met, he enjoys being held.

Logan is a big dude, sorta. He’s buff and strong, but he’s short. 5 feet, 3 inches.

He didn’t care until he got with you. He does dislike it, no he’s come to realize that he’s the perfect to be railed against anything

The wall, the desk, the door, the shower, the wall again.

All because he doesn’t have long limbs to get in his or your way.

Perfect height to get railed, 5 stars, would recommend.

His biggest kink is overstimulation

He recovers fast so you’ll have to fuck him for many, many hours.

This is probably the only way he’ll actually leave the bedroom.

Have a dildo/vibrator shoved up his ass while he has to be out and then coming home and getting fucked.

Personal headcanon that all mutants with healing mutations are extremely sensitive.

He’s pretty quiet during sex, but only because he forces himself to be.

It can take anywhere between 10-30 minutes for him to cum, it depends on what you're doing.

He loves cockwarming so damn much, doesn’t matter if he’s doing it with his ass or with his mouth.

Even though he’s impatient as hell and doesn’t like being told to wait. He thinks it’s part of the fun.

Okay onto ✨after care✨

Logan wasn’t a very good top, the pleasure part he was great at. But everything else? Completely ass.

He just fucked them and left.

So imagine his surprise when, after your first time with him, you ran a bath for you both.

He complained the whole time, mostly about how he could get up and bath himself. A complete lie, his legs were untrustworthy and would not hold him long enough for him to get to the bath.

Once you were both clean you got out and helped him get dressed, before changing the bed sheets and laying down with him.

This is the moment his lifelong addiction to being held began.

Even as he was falling asleep he could still hear you telling him how good he was and how much you loved him.

[batboyimagines]

Cold-Blooded [Damian Wayne x Male Reader]

Your Dad and your Ma’s relationship is... rocky to say the least. They were never actually together, no marriage or anything. It was just one night of bad decisions that made you.

So your birth wasn’t well planned. You think the reason your ma even kept you was because she was lonely. She’s raised you to the best her ability for they past fourteen years but it was only recently your dad found out. Now they have joint custody.

See, all of that isn’t normal per say, but it’s not bizarre or anything. Just two inexperienced, lonely people screwing up in more ways than one to make a whole nother screw up. However, your parents aren’t exactly average. One’s not even human. Anymore.

Medusa and John Constantine. By the gods, that’s probably the worst match imaginable. Moms great and all, you really do love her, but she’s a little crazy. Being exiled on an island all alone does that to you. And Constantine’s just... a mess. Not even a hot one.

Even so, you don’t mind being pawned between the two. They’re both great in their own ways and you appreciate the both of them. Right now you’re hanging out at your dad's house. Though it feels more like hanging out with an awkward uncle than a dad.

It’s nearing about 8:00 in the morning, not that you know that. You’re asleep on the couch, gazing blankly at the ceiling. You forgot to close your eyes while you sleep again. It’s sort of creepy.

A sudden pounding on the door startles you up, breaking the staring contest you were having with the ceiling. A contest which you totally won. You blink dazedly and the pounding starts up again.

Mournfully slipping out from under the soft, warm stack of blankets you slept under, you lumber towards the door. You squint through the peephole.

Through the peephole you see a warped view of six costumes lunatics of all sizes. You lean back from the door and let yourself have a begrudged yawn. Gods, it’s way too early for this. Dad’s still asleep even with all the racket.

The littlest lunatic in the hood pounds the door hard enough for it to shake in its frame and you decide you’ve had enough. You don’t bother with the chain latch and just open the door a crack.

“Do you know how early it is?” You groan. The little lunatic, who is actually around the same height as you, scoffs.

“It’s eight pm. A normal person would be awake and ready for the day by now.”

“Well, I don’t know how you people are up then because anyone who dresses like that isn’t normal.” The green guy snorts.

“Listen, we’re sorry to wake you, but is this the residency of John Constantine?” The guy in the black leotard asks.

“... no, why?” You ask suspiciously.

“We are the Teen Titans and we are in need of magical assistance.” The really tall, really exposed, redhead says. “We require his assistance, on behalf of the justice league.” You tense a bit at that.

Okay, you don’t hold the things that the gods did to your mom against those two members of the justice league, Aquaman and Wonder Woman. They seem like nice folks who really do want to do good and not for the selfish, vain reasons gods usually do, but…

They got their abilities from the same gods who really, really messed your mom up for no good reason. So call you petty, but you don’t want to associate with them.

“Sorry, he’s not here.” You say attempting to close the door on them. The hooded lunatic jams the door with his hand.

“This is a matter of utmost importance, you will take us to Constantine.” He demands. You scowl at him and try to shut the door on his fingers.

“Screw off weirdo, he’s not here!”

“He is, you are lying!”

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

“Am NOT!”

“Are TOO!”

“Christ on a cracker, what the bloody hell is going on?!” Your dad shouts, slamming the door shut, fully unlocking it and swinging it back open. Looks like the racket finally got him up. He sags at the sight of the troupe of crazies. “The hell do you people want?”

“We need your help.” Leotard man says.

“Of course you do. With what, I mean?”

“My father, Trigon, has possessed the justice league and we need a way to stop him.” The girl in purple replies. Your dad tenses.

“Trigon, eh? Sounds like a piece of work.” He says. You pretend to cough.

“Says the piece of work.” You tease under your breath because what’s even the point of a dad if you can’t make jabs at his life choices? He gives you a look and you just grin up at him.

“Why should I help you? The kind of magic that I’d have to use against that guy is expensive and tricky. I’m not gonna do it outta’ the good of my heart.”

“Because if you don’t help us, he could destroy the world.” Leotard says.

“Of course he could.” Dad breathes out as he sags against the door frame. You pat his arm. He looks at you and you give him an awkward smile. It seems to help him to a decision. He straightens up. “Well, I guess I don’t want the world to end. I need somewhere for this one to grow up.” He pats your head affectionately.

“Thanks.” You say, a bit embarrassed. Half because that’s the sappiest thing he’s ever said to you and half because, well, it’s nice to know you mean something to him. Even if he didn’t know that you existed until a few months ago.

“Well, come on in then.” He says turning from the doorway and into the apartment. The troupe of crazy people that nearly just broke into your house follow. You flounder for a moment.

“Wait, seriously? We’re just gonna let some random strangers, who nearly just broke in our house, inside just like that?” Your dad looks a bit guiltily at you. 

“Sorry bud, but this happens a lot more than I’d like.” He raises his hand hesitantly and gently lays it on your shoulder. “You can go back to your mother while I deal with this, if you’d like.”

“No, no it’s okay,” You quickly reassure, “it’s not bad it’s just… kinda weird. You know it’s weird right?” He snorts.

“Of course I do, but to be honest it’s almost normal for my line of work.”

“You should get into a different line of work then.”

“You know, I probably should.” 

Leotard man clears his throat- you know what? You want to know their names before they commandeer any more of your father-son bonding time. “By the way, what are your names? I feel I should know them before we do anything else.”

“Oh! My apologies,” Redhead replies, “I am Koriand’r, of Tamaran. And this is Blue Beetle, Beast boy, Raven, Nightwing, and Robin. We are the Teen Titans.”

“No offense, but you look more young adult than teenager?” She smiles sheepishly.

“Well, I was part of the original titans. I am now the leader.”

“Oh, okay, makes sense.”

“Alright,” your dad cuts in, “so what’s your plan for Trigon? What exactly do you want from me?” He and the Teen Titans begin to plan. You stick around for a bit, to get an idea of what your dad does. It’s not very interesting. So ten minutes into planning, you slip away to make breakfast.

Now, your dad is a mess. Not kind of a mess, a straight up mess. The kitchen is almost a reflection of your father. It’s a huge mess. There’s takeout boxes and dirty dishes strewn across every counter, no room for literally anything there is so much garbage. And this is only a few weeks worth of build up. Dad actually cleaned up before you arrived. 

Before you can even begin cooking you have to clean off the counters for some space. You’re trying to balance takeout boxes on top of the overflowing garbage can when a voice sounds from the doorway.

“This place is repulsive.” 

“HUAUGH FUCK!” You whip around flinging the takeout boxes across the room. Hooded lunatic, uh Robin you think, dodges them expertly. He seems a little surprised. You clutch at your chest, “Jesus, Christ man!”

“Apologies, I… did not mean to startle you.” He raises his hands a bit, as if calming a rapid animal. 

“Apology accepted.” You calm your rapid heart. Your freak out seems to have spooked any animosity Robin had earlier. The two of you stand around awkwardly. He’s a stranger in your house and he’s in a strangers house, which does not make for easy conversational partners. He looks around, avoiding your gaze. His eye catches on a painting on the wall.

“That is… an interesting picture.” He tries.

“Uh yeah, that’s actually a picture of my mom.” You say, playing with your hands.

“That is Medusa.”

“Yeah, she’s my mom.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I see.”

“She doesn’t actually look like that, that painting’s really inaccurate.”

“Why does your father keep it up?”

“I dunno,” You’d feel weird cooking with him watching you, so you make your way past Robin and into the dining room, “I think either pettiness or affection.”

“Pettiness?” He asks following you.

“Yeah, I mean, they aren’t together? I think they were at least acquaintances before they, uh, ‘conceived’ me. But they don’t seem to like each other very much nowadays.” You say, pulling a chair out from the table. You push the one across from you out with your bare foot and gesture towards it. Robin hesitates a moment, but decides to sit down. “What about your parents? They like each other any more than mine do?”

“No,” He snorts, “I think they like each other much less.”

“Oh.”

The conversation stalls. You shift uncomfortably. Robin stares a hole into the grimy table. 

“Why not?”

“Pardon?”

“Why don’t your parents like each other?” He seems to think over his answer. 

“They are on opposite sides of the law.” 

“Oh, that’s tough.”

“Yes.”

“There’s tons of couples on opposite sides of the law though.” 

“Not them. My father’s moral code cannot bend to suit my mother.”

“Ah, I see.” You lean across the table and pat his arm. He looks at it a bit suspiciously, you pull it back. “I’m sorry about your parents.”

“No need to apologize, I’ve already come to terms with it.”

“Yeah, well, still sucks.” You say standing up. “I was gonna make food, wanna lend me a hand? I’m still new to cooking appliances. And electricity.”

“How are these things new to you?” He asks, even as he stands up to help anyway.

“Dude. I grew up on an island with no electricity or WiFi. All of this,” you gesture to the space around you, “is totally alien to me.”

“Ah, I see. Yes, I will assist you.”

“Thanks.”

He failed to mention that he has never used a toaster either. You both nearly burn down the apartment, had it not been your dad’s fire extinguisher.

TO BE CONTINUED

[themilky-way]

Connections {s.r}

gif credit: nobravery on tumblr!

pairing: spencer reid x female! reader

summary: you work at the BAU and are best friends with everybody, except spencer. you think he just doesn’t like you until one day, he proves you wrong. 

warnings: just some minor hints of sadness, reader going through something, nothing major or specific. 

author’s note: ah yes I did miss writing and spencer reid has my heart entirely. stay safe guys! ALSO I’M BARELY ON SEASON 3 SO YA’LL BETTER NOT SPOIL ANYTHING ISTG LMAO

-------

working in the BAU, your job was never boring. five months in had changed your outlook on almost anything and everything in your life, and had your mind now racing at what seemed like a million miles per minute. it was an exhilarating  experience, regardless of how crude the crime scene could be, and it was about time you came to terms with that. 

the BAU team was just as thrilled to have you with them as you were to join. nobody expected-or wanted- a new member, and were ready to reject your application when they finally met you for the interview. however, after you demonstrated to everyone that you could profile a serial killer based on only the amount of blood at the scene and position of the victim, everyone basically wanted to give you the “welcome tour” of the headquarters. 

after you finally got an opportunity to get used to the layout of the job and your training ended, the team always looked forward to your “good morning” notes on their desk. being an early bird, you got there before everyone so you could get ahead on your reports, and always left small notes of encouragement on the person’s desk. it was a small and sweet gesture, and very much needed for the severity of the job. 

“seriously, this girl must be doing some type of hypnosis or something to everybody here. why is it that every time I see her, I just wanna hug her, huh?”

“not hypnosis, morgan. just plain ol’ appreciation,” jj said. they were huddled around his desk as they all read a note that said: “always keep your head up, champ. we appreciate the work you do around here :)”

by then, he was the last of the bunch to read his card. however, he didn't have a gold star attached to it, which meant he wasn’t the “agent of the day” as you liked to phrase it. derek flipped the sticky note over and attempted to find it, but stopped when he realized he wasn’t it. 

“wait, guys, so if I didn’t get a star, who did?” morgan asked, clearly puzzled. garcia shook her head and pouted, jj simply put a thumbs down, and prentiss muttered a “nope.” everyone knew hotch didn’t get it, because they figured he would call you in privately to thank you. everyone turned to look at you work in the conference room through the window. you were scribbling something on the whiteboard and had papers scattered everywhere on the table, unaware of the team’s puzzled expressions. at that moment, spencer walked through the double glass doors of the bureau and headed over to his desk as he normally would. as he did so, he found the team huddled together and looking at something, and when he followed their gaze he knew what this was about.

in truth, spencer never really cared for having a friendship with you. he looked at you as a coworker and just that, and developing a platonic relationship with you just wasn't anywhere in his mind. he did enjoy the words of encouragement and motivation every morning, though, and no matter how many phases of denial he went through, he looked for it as soon as he reached his desk. 

“hey, guys, wanna hear something I discovered about dolphins last night?” spencer teased as he made his way over to morgan’s desk. nobody turned their heads from your direction, and it wasn't until reid mentioned your note that everyone stopped profiling you and turned their attention to him.

“you guys wanna hear-yeah that’s what I thought-wanna hear my note (y/n) left me?” he held up the sticky note and everyone nodded eagerly. he turned the note so he was able to read it, and began. “ ‘the world is smart, but you’re smarter. have a great day, reid!’ how cool is this!” he smiled and at that point so did everyone, when they realized that the note still had more to it. 

“oh my god, reid! you got the gold star! congratulations sunshine,” garcia pointed out as she gave him a light punch on the shoulder. spencer’s mind started bouncing back and forth between thoughts when he looked at the tiny gold sticker below your comment. did this mean anything? should he mention it? 

the answer to that was yes, he should, but was he going to? probably not. pats on the back were given as the team got up from morgan’s desk and headed to their own when hotch came out of his office and told everyone to meet in the conference room in five to look over a new case. reid, as he walked back to his pile of reports, looked at you working on your own. he never really thought of you as a friend, and didn't want to for that matter. but the longer he looked at you he started to realize that maybe befriending you wouldn't be so horrible. as everyone entered the room and gave you a hug or cheery greeting, spencer opted to sit at the other end of you. but one thing was for sure: his smile was the brightest one in the room. 

the next few weeks went by quickly, and included a variety of new “agents’ of the day.” after reid, there was morgan, who practically wanted to kiss you after that. emily followed, who was beginning to turn into one of your closest friends. jj and garcia came next, and soon the four of you founded a girl’s night out every weekend. 

however, them being the best profilers in the entire bureau, they noticed that the notes progressively stopped. the team realized something was off with you, and they noticed that your demeanor was different. you began to come later than you usually did, at one point even later than derek. your hairstyle changed to a messier bun, your desk was worse than reid’s, and no more cute notes were seen for almost two weeks. 

“something’s wrong, you guys. she’s been here for months and she’s never once frowned or even forgot to put the cap back on her pen,” emily said, packing her files in her briefcase. jj nodded her head, “yeah I know, and I want to ask but I don’t want to make her uncomfortable. I mean, what if we’re reading too much into it?”

“reading into it? jj, we profile murderers who we’ve never even met, I’m pretty sure (y/n)’s going through something,” morgan stated, standing up from his chair and pushing it in adequately.

“we know one thing: when she’s ready to vent, we’ll be here. in the meantime, we should go home and get some rest. we fly out to oregon tomorrow,” hotch said. everyone agreed, and they stood up and gathered their belongings and headed for the exit door. they waved and said their goodbye’s to you, who was seated at the other end of the room. 

you were the only one left at the bureau, and you were more tired than usual due to your lack of sleep recently. you closed your eyes, took a couple of deep breaths, and began to massage your temples with your pointer fingers. it’s been tough for you, taking care of your grandparents ever since they came to live with you. arguments with your mother always lead to the same thing: leaving. you loved them, and you adored having family with you, especially in a job like the one you had. but you had to sacrifice your sleep and wellbeing in order for them to be safe. 

you were so concentrated in your thoughts that you didn’t hear footsteps coming down the stairs, moving towards your direction, and finally coming to a complete stop next to your desk. it wasn't until a soft voice broke you from your thoughts, or more so from your nap at that point. 

“(y/n)?”

you lifted your head rapidly, and looked up to find the source of the voice, and when you did, you managed to slur, “reid, what the hell, I, uh, thought I was the only one left.

“no, I was just catching up on my reports and was about to go home. by the looks of it, you should too.”

“alright, catch you in the morning, spence. I still gotta finish this case file,” you were looking at him now, and as you spoke you gave a tiny nod to your opened manila folder. “wait you’re staying later? do you know how dangerous it is for girls of your type to be out at these hours of the night? I read a study once that determined women who wandered at night suffered the most danger between the hours of 1 a.m. to 4 a.m.. I mean you don't want to put yourself-”

“I'm not gonna be long, dr. reid, I think I’ll be fine,” you cut him off mid fact. you returned to your paperwork and picked up your pen to write some notes on the margin, and when you looked back up a couple minutes later, you found reid staring at you, confusion clearly manifesting over his features. 

‘I suggest offering you a seat, sir. that way you can look at me in distress as long as you like,” you let yourself chuckle a little bit, and even though it made spencer want to laugh too, he restrained himself and asked you what had troubled him for weeks now. 

“(y/n), what’s going on? you’re not the same since garcia got the last morning note from you. seriously, I-I’m here to help you.”

dropping your pen, you swiveled your chair so you were in his direction and looked up at him to answer him. “in all honesty, and by no means full offense, I don’t think you care what’s going on with me.”

in his mind, reid was going nuts, and his silence? not helping very much. all he could do was look down at you with a shocked expression and his mouth opened and closed before he finally rebutted your statement.

“(y/n), I’m sorry I made it seem that way. I really am and the truth is I didn’t really care for your notes at first until I stopped receiving them.” he crouched down now to level with your height on the chair, a hand laying on his knee and the other on the ground for balance. 

“I didn’t really care for a friend, until I realized I wanted your friendship. I never even thanked you for giving me the privilege of being ‘agent of the day.’”

you realized he meant it, and it wasn’t some cheesy reponse you were so used to getting. he felt it, and you began to realize you could also trust him even a little.

“thanks, reid. sorry for lashing out too, it’s just things haven’t been so easy back home. do you mind?” 

“of course not. I’m all ears, (y/n).” you nodded and thanked him, standing up from your chair and kneeling down to ultimately sit down criss cross on the ground. he did the same as you, and his attention was fully yours.

you told him everything that had happened; the fights with your mom, your grandparents moving in, your lack of sleep and how you felt. you vented to him about almost everything in your life and he listened like his life depended on it. at the end, you were crying a little no matter how hard you tried not to. amidst everything, he had pulled you into an awkward sort of hug, considering your position and the fact he doesn't give much physical affection to people. nonetheless, he gave you the comfort you needed and you valued it. 

he pulled away suddenly, and lifted himself off the ground a little to get his phone from his pocket. he asked you to get yours, and you did so by reaching over to the top of your desk. the both of you exchanged phones and he wrote his rather rapidly, you still trying to think about your own area code by the time he was finished. 

you exchanged phones again, and when you grabbed yours from his hand, he held on to it as well. before he let go, he looked down at the ground and then landed on your hand on the phone. 

“you can call me whenever you want. even if you don’t have a reason too.”

his eyes flicked up to your semi-red eyes, and he smiled softly. you did as well, and he felt small butterflies forming in his tummy when you did. spencer reid didn’t care for affection, nor for personal connections with anyone. but perhaps you were beginning to turn into the only exception. 

and he didn't really mind it at all. 

[shadowgamerhalo]

Hello! May I please have a creepypasta romantic match-up and or a little scenario to go with it? (But only write what your up for) Tysm in advance! Anyways I hope you have a great day/night and tysm once again!

Zodiac sign: Leo sun, Aries moon, Leo rising

Personality Type: ENTP

Pronouns: She/her

Sexuality: Straight (For now might be bi but i'm going with straight) I'm 5'4 and I have a very tiny body frame so i'm extremely petite and pretty small. I'm not very curvy and I literally have the body of a cereal box...lol but its fine because I have nice hips and thighs. I have thick brown hair that goes down to my back and it gets tangled pretty easily but its kinda fluffy. I have brown eyes and tiny freckles all over my face and body. I also have a very strong grunge style, like Flannels, band t-shirts, combat boots, leather jackets etc. But i'd also always enjoy a nice oversized sweatshirt or hoodie with a pair of skinny, ripped jeans and some converses or something along those lines. For my personality.....this is where things get interesting. At first people find me very intimidating due to my resting bitch face and cold exterior but I promise i'm not like that ALL the time. When you get to know me, i'm goofy and about everything that comes out of my mouth is sarcasm or some dry humored joke. I'm also that one friend in a group where they literally will do the stupidest shit ever like for an example one time it was super dark outside and my other friend was there, while I was trying to climb a tree and I failed and fell out of the tree, and landed on my back. I got straight up after that somehow it didn't hurt.....like at all? But yeah i'm super reckless and sometimes people have to save me from myself if you get what I mean. I also have a very strong "I don't give a fuck" attitude and I will not hesitate to stick up for myself or my friends....like i'm the type of person where if someone glares at me, i'll glare right back.

I have bad anxiety and I can be very self destructive. This is where my feisty, stubborn, hardheaded side comes in. If I want something then i'll fight for it even if it hurts me and i'll get into a bad cycle of putting myself down and trying to do better even if I did great the first time but I always push myself too far and other people have to stop me because I usually can't see it when its happening. I also cover my emotions up and I have a lot of trouble talking about whats bothering me or what problems i'm having emotionally so I put up a wall and I act tough, or happy and sometimes i'll be the exact opposite but I try to hide it. Weird things about me: I've grown up in the south all my life so sometimes when I talk a few words they'll come out sounding WAYYY more country and southern then I wanted, I don't have an accent but sometimes my words just come out that way. I also love the smell of cigarette smoke....let me explain. When I was a kid my parents smoked a lot and I was used to smelling it and now it reminds me of home and is sort of comforting.

Things I like: I love swimming (I was on a swim team for about 9 years), I love horror movies, I like rain and the sounds of thunderstorms because its calming to me, I also love the smell of rain, I like cloudy days, cooking, listening to 80's and 90's rock but mainly 90's because 90's is the best, My favorite bands are Bush, Audioslave, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Linkoln Park, Pearl jam but i'm pretty open to anything.

Things I dislike: Spiders.......I will scream if I see a spider.

I pair you with the part tsundere Bloody Painter!

Helen doesn't fall easily. So your relationship was probably a bit rocky, with first impression, since Helen and you have that same problem. This though, did start the conversation which led to your relationship, so it was actually was good in the end!

In general Helen has a quiet exterior, though once you got to know each other, you can actually see why he hangs around Puppet. Cause this man, has one wicked sense of humor. As soon as you show your more goofy, sacrasm side. Helen is showing how devious he is. You'll likely see it first with your fear of spiders. Expect a bit of teasing, cause he will smirk at you, before he squishes it, and then proceed to tease you a bit.

He's definitely the kind of person to trick someone into doing something stupid, for his amusement. So he will make no exception of not pulling that on you. Though he will probably make sure you're okay in the end, just cause he loves you. The kind of person to deny it, but really you can tell. Cause for you, he's easier to read. If you stick up for friends, then expect him right behind you making the most threatening aura possible to the person you're fighting. Which means you'll win most of your fights, without having to throw a punch.

Your anxiety and self destructive tendencies, will likely have you seeing a very gentle and soft side to Helen, much quicker than you would think. He also has trouble explaining his emotions, though he will become good at reading yours. Likely you will become good at reading his, so it'll be a balance. Granted, Helen is stubborn too, though in a different way as he's also patient. He will stick with you once he's attached, no matter what.

You sounded southern with some words, actually makes Helen giggle and he will tease you for it. Though once you're around him long enough, you'll realize that he has that. Such as him sounding more cockney, such as whenever he tries to pronounce meter, and so on and so forth. Plus a bonus if you hear him say shit. I suggest recording that, to tease him back as revenge >;)

Helen surprisely smokes, not a lot but you can tell when he does. So you'll probably smell it in his clothes. Which means if you steal them, that means you'll get a flustered Helen, who probably will initiate cuddles afterwards. Cause he's not the tallest in the manor, being at 5'8, but you'll still be smol to him, which he adores. He won't mock you for your height, though he might pick you up like a cat. He also likes your hair, cause he can style it for drawings of you, and he likes running his fingers through your hair while cuddling.

Speaking of drawing, expect to be draw a lot. Like even when you're not too aware of it, Helen will probably be drawing you absent-mindly. If you're swimming, probably will be drawing you doing it. Helen will show you his art, as you've become his muse. No worries, not the blood paintings. He might even give you ones with things you like, like a cloudy day one.

You can introduce him to your music, and he'll likely listen to it with you while he draws or paints. Also, you'll have to remind him to eat sometimes especially when he's in creative mode, so practice for cooking. Also if you give him some shepherd's pie, he will shower you with affection.

This one took a while, as I tried my best to find on that fit. I hope this to your liking, I did my best. If you want a scenario based off of this then, I'm happy to provide. This goes for all who ask for match-ups.

[ppaperheartss]

Godzilla

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

word Count: 5.7K

Warnings: a lil angst, some swearing

A/N: Hey! I really hope you enjoy this, I’ve worked really hard on it. Inspired by Godzilla by Kesha. Any comments or feedback are appreciated!

-

Bucky Barnes wanted to find peace. His whole life had revolved around fighting and angst and fear, and now he decided it was time for that part of his life to be over. It took him a long time to readjust to a life without meaning, without something to fight for. He spent his days wandering around the compound looking for someone he could spend time with, but most of the time the compound was a ghost town. So he kept himself occupied with therapist appointments, catching up on pop culture and exploring different music genres.

(Rumour has it that Bucky was seen working out to Taylor Swift’s new album, but he always denies it regardless.)

He was proud of everyone else on the team. Sam took on the role of Captain America with both hands and was eager to help the country with the pressing issues which the Avengers never got the chance to handle. Captain America is now the frontface for Black Lives Matter and is tackling gun violence one day at a time. He is making America great again. 

Wanda has taken on the role of training new agents and works very close with orphanages in New York to rehabilitate young people who have led traumatic lives. She even introduced the Pietro Maximoff Foundation which aims to find people that had been injured in all Avenger fights as collateral damage and get them the help they so rightly deserve.

Scott spends a lot of time with Cassie to make up for all of the years that they missed together, and he even has another little one on the way with Hope. Though Bucky isn’t very fond of children yet he’s open to the idea of a miniature sized version of Scott running around the compound and causing havoc. Even the thought of it brings a smile to his face. 

Parker recently graduated high school and now works with Bruce a lot of the time in their own lab in the centre of the city to continue on with the work that Tony had started. After the whole fiasco with his identity being outed he tends to keep a low profile, taking his time to get used to the spotlight that is everyday life as an Avenger.

Bucky is still coping with that too, honestly. It’s strange walking down a street knowing that everyone probably knows his name and his history, and has an opinion of him, when he has never seen them before in his life. Maybe he has. He struggles with his memory too.

When he was diagnosed with PTSD and anxiety, it was a strange experience. He had a little knowledge on it from his uncle who had fought in war before him and suffered from the illnesses, but it was different knowing about it and being diagnosed with it he realised quickly. He’s cautious around strangers and struggles to speak to someone who he doesn’t know if he can trust yet, but his therapist Dr. Walker says he’ll develop with time. He just needs to focus on his breathing and find something to distract hunsekd. 

And he did. He went from not being able to open up the door for his takeout - which the app to order said takeout took him just a bit too long to understand - to being able to speak at veterans meetings with Sam in front of a couple dozen people. He connected well with the other veterans, especially those who had lost a limb in war, and found himself looking forward to the meetings for the chance to speak to people who shared similar life experiences and didn’t give him a sad look whenever he opened up about his nightmares. Knowing he wasn’t alone gave him a sense of belonging, something that he hadn’t felt in a very long time.

He retired from the Avengers and moved to a small apartment in Brooklyn that Sam helped him look for. He even went couch shopping with him, making sure that he bought the deepest and comfiest one there. He didn’t mind, he loved how comfortable modern things are compared to the 30s, but he wondered why he insisted on getting that particular one. That was, until one night Sam came to his apartment blackout drunk and slept there for 15 hours straight. He only woke once to complain drunkenly about how small the blankets were, to which received a pillow to the head.

Bucky enjoys having his own place to live. He wakes up early in the morning to go on a leisurely run through his neighbourhood and watch the sky turn from red to pink to blue. He stops at the cafe at the bottom of his street for whatever pastry is fresh and a sweet coffee.

He then comes home to his cat and plants, and spends his days loving and caring for them. He found Alpine on what could have been one of the worst nights he’s experienced in his normal life. It had been raining heavily for hours and Bucky was walking home from therapy when he was jumped by a group of men. In the panic of it all he lashed out, and having not been in the field for so long he underestimated his strength.

A civilian got hurt in the scrapple, but she was so scared of who he was that she refused to take help from him. The police then arrived and Bucky had to fight his case for an hour in the pouring rain with only a running tee on. It was a witness from an apartment block on the other side of the street who came to Bucky’s aid and explained how he hadn’t started the fight and didn’t hurt the woman on purpose. He walked home in a storm of a mood, his whole body shaking with anxiety and the cold seeping into his bones, when he heard a faint meow come from a dark alley. 

He quickly swooped into action without hesitation, fishing the small creature out of the soggy box it was in and shielding it under his arm as he started to jog home.

That’s how he found himself an hour later sitting face to face with a small white cat with eyes he thought resembled his own in a strange way. He knew he was going to keep the cat without hesitation, he just wondered how something so pure could have made its way into his fuck-up of a day.

He even got a job in a coffee shop for a short while when Dr. Walker felt he was ready for it, so he could work on his social skills and how to control situations positively. He lasted a whole month in the shop and he made fairly good relationships with his colleagues and frequent customers, but he was asked to leave one afternoon as they had had a complaint from a daily customer about him. Apparently Bucky has a resting face that looks intimidating, and made the customer feel anxious. He had a tough time in his head that night. It took him a few days of wallowing in self pity and several conversations with Sam and Dr. Walker to realise he didn’t do anything wrong. He had to accept the fact he couldn’t convince everyone he was a good guy, and this is something he is still learning to accept.

He had felt so much misery over his lifetime that he thought he would never get the chance to be happy again, perhaps this new life would be enough for him. Though, he had to admit, that the fact that the only constant human interaction he had on a daily basis would be with store workers when he went grocery shopping, it was starting to make him feel lonely. It was like he lived on the moon, only watching others live their lives from a distance as he lived his own mundane life. That, of course, was before he met you.

You came shining into his life like a beam of sunlight that made him feel warm and fuzzy on the inside. There wasn’t a moment where your beautiful smile didn’t grace your face, and the joy on you radiated instantly made his day a whole lot better. You had been neighbours for quite a while before your first interaction, though you would always give him a chipper smile when he passed you in the hallways to which he responded to with a bashful grin.

Bucky woke up with a feeling something was wrong one day, and his suspicions were confirmed when he got a call from the nursing home informing him that Steve was sick. He knew he had to visit right away, just in case, but he didn’t know how long he would be gone and refused to leave Alpine alone. He couldn’t ask Sam, he was too busy being Captain America and a dumbass to properly care for a cat, so he moved onto what seemed to be his only other option.

The super soldier stood in your door frame (which was just too small for him to stand at his full height comfortably in) with a cat carrier in hand, blue bag slung over his shoulder and a desperate smile on his face. “Hi, I’m Bucky. Barnes. Bucky Barnes. Your neighbour. Room 6? Anyway, I need to ask a huge favour of you. I have to visit a friend out of town but I can’t leave Alpine alone - she doesn’t like it at night, and I was really, really, hoping you could watch her for a few days. I understand if you’re busy or have plans, though!”

You listened to his ramblings with an amused smile on your face, hand on the doorframe and leaning forward slightly. “Alpine?” you mused, eyebrow raised slightly.

His cheeks tinted instantly as he nodded down to the now meowing carrier. “Yeah, my cat. She’s two. She’s lovely, I promise. Doesn’t scratch or anything, she’s a real doll. You won’t even notice she’s there.”

You had bent down to look inside the carrier as he continued to ramble, only to be met with remarkable blue eyes which matched its owner’s perfectly. Cooing softly at her, you look up to meet the other pair of striking blue eyes. “Of course I’ll watch her for you. What else are neighbours for?”

He smiles instantly, shoulders relaxing as he lets out a breath. Holding out the carrier to you with his metal arm which you took instantly, he starts, “Thank you so much…”

“Y/N. Y/N L/N.”

“Y/N.” he repeats, setting the bag at your feet. “My number’s in there if you need anything, please don’t hesitate to call. I’m better at calling than texting. Thank you, again, I owe you.” He smiles before waving quickly as you exchange goodbyes, turning on his heel and walking quickly to his car with keys in hand. 

After closing your door you set the carrier down and open it up, lifting out the small white cat into your arms. Smiling fondly, you press a kiss between her ears. You wandered over to your window to see Bucky climbing into his car as he held a phone between his ear and shoulder, and something deep inside of you knew this was the start of something special.

After that first encounter, you and Bucky seemed to be glued to the hip. It started off as a coffee date as a thank you after he got home from the weekend in which you watched Alpine, and you were glad to hear that Steve was well. It then evolved into a home cooked dinner from you the next day because Bucky refused to let you pay for your coffee even though you insisted and you wanted to pay him back somehow. He was always a gentleman with you. 

It then turned into weekly Friday night movie nights to catch him up on what he had missed movie-wise and supermarket shopping together the next morning because Bucky loved shopping in near-empty supermarkets just as much as you. Somewhere along the line you both got keys cut for the other’s apartment and you more often than not spent everyday together, even if it was just spending your hour lunch break from work sitting on a park bench chatting. You both had formed the best friendship possible, so it was no surprise to anyone that you wound up dating. It was meant to be, really. Soulmates. 

But not when Bucky went to the gym, because there was no way you would be caught dead doing physical activities.

You loved being around Bucky; he was sweet and caring and loved to try whatever new hobby you were experimenting with. He would always taste-test your cooking and baking and never say anything mean about it - even that time you made cupcakes and used salt instead of sugar he was quick to force it down and sing its praises. He cries at dog movies and volunteered at the local animal shelter weekly after you informed him one night that he could because he was just desperate for some interaction with the dogs. You were surprised he hadn’t come home with every single dog his first day there because he just wanted them to be loved so much. 

Bucky Barnes was a Saint sculpted by gods who had a heart of gold, and you could never see him any other way. Sure, you knew his history. Hell, you had even written a paper all about him and the Howling Commandos in your college History class, but none of that mattered to you. The Winter Soldier had been gone for over a decade, the trigger words meaningless and the mystery over, and you just wanted to know Bucky. Not his past - not that he could remember much of it anyway - but his and your relationship’s future together and what possibilities come along with that.

-

Bucky loved going shopping with you. He would give you an armful of clothes and make you give him a fashion show, where he would cheer for you and clap obnoxiously and shower you with the sweetest compliments, and you both savoured every second of it. You also had a fairly decent understanding of fashion, so you would help him keep up with all of the trends and keep him looking as gorgeous as he always is. So a Saturday spent together roaming the mall should be the perfect outing for the both of you. If only you could do it alone.

You held his hand tightly in yours, fingers intertwined and palms sweating slightly, but you were sure it was only his that was. You kept him near to know he was safe and coping, because crowds were one hundred percent not his thing. Maybe that’s why recently he had taken a liking to online shopping, because you could still have your famous fashion show in the comfort of his safe, judgemental free apartment. You could feel every set of eyes follow you and the six foot ex-assassin beside you for longer than necessary as they walked past you both, but you kept your head held high. No one was ever going to make you feel bad for loving Bucky. Not now, not ever.

“Oh my God.”

“That poor girl.”

“Stay back, he’s dangerous.”

“Do we just let murderers walk free now?”

You don’t know if the people walking by tried to be discreet with their whispering or wanted you both to hear, but you could hear them so Bucky definitely heard them. Looking up at him as you feel his breathing hitch, you follow his eye line and find a small girl being whisked away by her mother with fear evident on her face. The air around you grew thick, like you could feel his suffocating anxiety grow. He didn’t want to scare anyone, and this sight seemingly pushed him over the edge into a downward spiral.

Tugging on his arm you grab his attention, flashing him a reassuring smile.

“Why don’t we get food? I’m starving.” He simply nods in response, not trusting his voice.

You sit across from him in the booth in the corner of the food court, eating happily as you watch him visibly relax into his surroundings. He has a mountain of food in front of him but you know it’s never enough, and you just grin as he reaches over to swipe some of your fries.

You both talk mindlessly about insignificant things; a jacket that caught his eye, where you’d like to go next, how you both are craving ice cream, oblivious to the numerous pairs of eyes staring at you two. The flash of a camera and a series of giggles catches your attention. You quickly look to Bucky to see his reaction, but just smile at him distracted by his milkshake which has now covered his face. You lean over the table to wipe it away with a napkin before kissing his nose gently, and he smiles happily at you as his cheeks tint red.

“Why don’t we just leave after this?” He looks up at you, and it pains you to see the hope in his eyes at the thought of leaving. “We can go to that ice cream parlour at the bottom of the avenue and have a walk in the park instead.”

You smile at him. “That sounds so much better than shopping, baby. Let me go throw all of this in the trash then we can go.”

“No, I’ve got it. I’ll be two ticks.” He slides out of the booth, pecking your lips quickly as he picks up the trays and walks over to the trash. You still have a smile on your lips as you pull on your jacket and pick up your purse, but it fades quickly when you hear a crash and yells from behind you.

Jumping out of the booth quickly you turn, finding Bucky standing with a now empty tray between a bunch of chairs and a woman draped across the floor covered in the remains of your lunch. Bucky’s shaking as he tries to stammer out an apology. You assume that they’ve bumped into each other, and with Bucky’s strength she fell back hard. 

People had started to crowd around as the woman went into painfully fake hysterics about how he had attacked her, and Bucky just stood there like a deer in headlights. Pushing through the crowd you run to him, grabbing the tray from his hands and setting it on a table. You take his hand in his, holding onto it tightly, and he leans into your touch to try to make his body as small as possible.

A hush settled over the crowd as the woman’s cries turned into whimpers when she realised she had an audience. “That thing just assaulted me! Did you see it? Doing this to a vulnerable woman!”

A few people murmured agreements to her accusations, and it only made your blood boil more. 

“Bucky is a person, not a thing,” All eyes turned on you, and you only stood taller to secure your confidence. “and he wouldn’t harm a fly. I’m sure this was all just some sort of accident.”

She scoffed as she was helped up to stand from a few bystanders. “He’s a criminal. He knows nothing but hurting people. Just look at that,” she gestured to Bucky’s metal arm that he was now trying to hide away behind his body. 

Just as you tried to defend Bucky, the crowd started getting rowdy again and you felt a tug on your hand. Looking back you see a mortified looking Bucky with glistening eyes. His voice is so weak you almost don’t catch what he says.

“Just leave it, Y/N. Please. I want to go home.” You nod quickly, fixing your bag over your shoulder and delivering the woman a scowl as you turn and practically run out of the mall together. You didn’t want to make a scene, because it always affects Bucky worse. 

The car ride is silent, you in the drivers’ seat and Bucky bouncing his knee beside you, eyes shifting around frantically. You sit in the parking lot of your apartment block for a while, Bucky’s head on your shoulder and your hand running through his hair softly as he finally lets himself go. You stay there until his shoulders ache and he can’t find anymore tears to cry. You hold him close as you walk to your apartment, and he sits on the bathroom counter as you run a warm bath. You drop in his favourite bath bomb, and that at least brings a smile to his face.

He finally begins to relax as he sinks into the warm water and you sit on the edge of the tub, treading your fingers through his hair gently. It’s quiet for a while, but both of your minds are loud. 

“I wish they would see you like I do.” Your voice cuts through the air like a knife. He sighs, shaking his head. 

“They never will. Why should they? I’m a monster.” Bucky sounds weak. He’s tired of living like this, scared that he’ll make one wrong move and his face will be plastered all over the news. 

“You’re not a monster, Buck.” You keep your voice steady. “You're the kindest, sweetest person I know. I don’t care about your past at all, and I… I love you.”

You weren’t planning to tell him you loved him for the first time, but it just seemed right in the moment.  He’s quiet for a while, and you begin to wonder if he actually heard you or has fallen asleep from the warm water and lavender. 

Bucky takes a deep breath before he speaks again. 

“I love you, too.”

You can’t control the smile that takes over your face and you lean forward, planting a kiss on his head. You hear him smile and he moves to see you. The water swishes as he moves. A wet hand cups your cheek and you lean into the touch, watching his eyes stare at your feet as he struggles to get his words out. 

“I love you so much it hurts. I wake up in the morning and see you laying beside me, and I know that I’m where I’m supposed to be. I just don’t want to screw it all up.” He finally meets your eyes. They’ve turned a stormy blue, and you can see all of his emotions swirling around them. 

You turn your head to the side and kiss the palm of his hand, your fingers still running through his hair gently. He leans in, the tension escaping his muscles. He sighs as he pulls away, resting his forehead on yours. You smile at him, pecking his nose quickly. 

“You could never mess this up. You’re my soulmate. Now, how about we have that ice cream now?” the two of you share a knowing smile. 

You squeal as Bucky pulls you in for a hug, both of you laughing as he soaks your clothes and peppers your face in kisses. 

-

“This is wrong, this is all wrong. I told you I should’ve worn a tie! Even Steve agreed with me on that one! I look so stupid wearing, why the hell am I wearing a leather jacket to meet your parents? Can we turn back? I’ll change quickly. Let me cut my hair. Is it too long?” Bucky pulls down the passenger mirror to inspect himself, his forehead creasing as he tries to perfect his already styled hair. 

You sigh as you reach over from the steering wheel and take his hand, bringing it over to kiss his knuckles gently. “You look great. It doesn’t matter what you wear. They’ll love you no matter what.”

He grumbles a disagreement as he sinks back in his seat, changing the song playing through the car radio until he finds a depressing song to play to match his mood. You had noticed he did that a lot after only a week of dating. Whenever he’s happy you will almost always hear Michael Jackson or Queen playing from wherever he is in the apartment, and he had downloaded Spotify’s Sad Songs for whenever he felt down. 

You reach over and change the song quickly, which earns a sharp look from him. You scoff, but you both know that it’s not malicious. “Calm down, Buck. You’re just nervous. We’re having a barbecue, not a fancy meal in a fancy restaurant.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I just don’t want them to hate me. Would you leave me if they hate me?” He sounds like what a sad puppy would if it were able to speak. Stopping at a red light, you turn your body to face him. 

“I love you, okay? Nobody will ever come between us, not even my parents. Just flash them that charming smile of yours and they’ll have you hooked.” He smiles bashfully at you, and you grin as you kiss him quickly. 

After that the ride is short and sweet to your parents’ home. Honestly, you didn’t know how they were going to react to Bucky. You hadn’t told them who he was specifically, just that he was your handsome boyfriend who you loved very much. They had always been accepting of whatever life choices you made, even when you decided to drop out of college. They just wanted you to be happy. And Bucky made you happy, so that means they should accept him. 

You held onto his hand tightly as you walked up the driveway, and before flashing him one last reassuring smile you knocked the door. The air was tense and time seemed to stretch as you waited for one of your parents to open up the door. Even you were becoming slightly nervous. 

The door handle jiggles before the door flies open, and you smile fondly at your mother standing in the doorway. Bucky smiles too, though it’s a nervous one. 

It had been so long since he had felt any parental love - he thinks about his family everyday - and as selfish as it sounds he was hoping he could use this as an opportunity to finally have a stable father figure in his life. From the stories he had heard from you, he decided you had lived the life he had always dreamed of. Family trips, game nights, going out for special meals together. Even just the little things, like how you called them every night to say goodnight. He craved stability in his life, and this may be one way he can achieve it. 

She looks between you both, the smile on her face fading the longer she looks at Bucky. Just as you open your mouth you see her eyes flit downwards - straight age Bucky’s metallic hand. He adjusts his hand to loosen his grip on yours and swallows dryly. A strangled gasp escaped her lips before she grabbed your empty hand roughly, tugging you inside and scrambling to lock the door behind you. 

“Y/N! What were you thinking, bringing that monster here!” She searched your face as if she was hoping to find bruises under your makeup, and your blood boiled. 

“What the hell?” You shouted at her. Reaching back you feel for the door handle, but she takes your hand in hers before you can. 

“Do you not watch the news? He’s dangerous.” She pulls away, staring at you like you were crazy. “Has he been lying to you?”

“I know exactly who he is mom-”

“Then it’s… it’s Stockholm Syndrome. I’ve read about that! I think I’m using that right.” she says. You scoff at how ridiculous she’s being, fully conscious of Bucky standing behind the door. She only frowns. 

“I can’t believe you’re doing this. That’s my boyfriend that you just locked outside.”

“Whatever’s you’re feeling isn’t love, honey. I’ve heard everything about him. Did you know he attacked some poor woman in a food court a few days ago?” There's a tinge of pity in her voice, and it only makes you more angry. 

“Oh my god,” you moan. “He is my boyfriend! That’s the James that I told you about! And you just slammed the door on his face and called him a monster.”

Her movements falter as realisation dawns on her face. She actually loves the monster, is what you assume she’s thinking. You turn and swing open the door, only to see Bucky seemingly frozen in place in shock and mortification. He just blinks and stares at you, and you just want to swaddle him up into a blanket and hold him close right on the spot. 

You reach your hand out for him, but he flinches back and stumbles down the steps. 

“Th-This is all wrong. I’m sorry. I knew I shouldn’t have come.” He sounds weak, like a child after being scolded.

He stands there looking lost, like he wants to run away and never come back but is also too scared to turn his back on you. He isn’t leaving you, just the situation. He doesn’t know what to do. Will you hate him for this? Are you angry that he isn’t standing up for himself? But he doesn’t want to shout what he wants to say. He wants to be calm. He’s learned how to be calm. How can he learn to be calm after everything he’s gone through, but no one else can?

Your dad comes to the door and you know things will only get worse. You step down to stand beside Bucky, holding his hand tightly. 

“Y/N, what’s going on here? Who is that man?” Your dad seems just as confused about the situation as you are. 

“Mom just- ugh. I can’t believe this is actually happening.” You didn’t want to cause a scene, just because of the sheer fact that your mom knows about what happened the other day so if one person sees this who knows what it will be escalated to in the media. 

“She ruined today. Today was supposed to be amazing and she messed it all up because she didn’t want to give Bucky a chance.” 

“Sweetie, look at him,” your mom began to defend herself. “Can you blame me? All I know is that he is a killer with an arm made of metal. He could hurt you!” 

“Like you are?” She stared back at you in shock. “You took one look at him and decided he was a monster. He’s a person just like us, and he deserves to be treated like one. I’m sorry, but I can’t stand here and allow you to treat him like that. I love him and he loves me, and that’s all that matters.”

Your dad calls on you as you storm to the car, but you don’t listen. Slamming the door behind you, you push your foot in the ignition and drive away as soon as Bucky gets in the car. 

Bucky doesn’t know what to do. Normally he knows how to help you, but he’s never seen you like this before. You’re shaking, and he doesn’t know if it’s from anger or fear. Fear that you’ve lost your parents? He’s so lost and feels terrible that he can’t help you. 

It takes about fifteen minutes for you to stop seeing red and finally slow down to the speed limit. It was like something else took over your body and you were watching from five feet away. Everything happened so quickly. What actually just happened. Are you in the wrong? Maybe you should’ve told them about him before. You don’t want to have to but you know you should have. Explain it. Him. Bucky. 

Looking over you see him half smiling patiently at you. He’s the one hurting right now, but he’s hiding it so he can be there for you. You don’t mean it, but the look he gives you when your lip trembles causes the floodgates to open. 

He manages to reach over to the wheel and guide the car off the side of the road when the road begins to get blurry from tears. 

“I’m so sorry, Bucky. I didn’t know she was going to do that. Never in a million years did I think she’d do that! She-she’s horrible and nasty and-”

“Y/N, please.” Bucky reaches out and holds your hand, his other reaching up to wipe the tears off of your face. “You don’t mean that.”

“But it’s still not okay.”

“I know it’s not,” he sighs. “I just thought they would be more like you.” He smiles weakly at you. 

“So did I.” You sniff as you lean over, resting your head against his shoulder. His lips instantly reach down to kiss your head gently. 

“Let’s leave it for now, and you can call in a few days. Maybe we can convince them to come around to me. I know you want them to like me.” Bucky’s voice doesn’t sound as hopeful as his words, but he wants this for you. You’ve always had a good relationship with your parents and he doesn’t want to be the reason it’s all messed up. He knows he’s not worth it. Well… yes, I am worth it, he forces himself to think. 

He knows his worth in this relationship. He knows he means so much to you. You mean the world to him. He hopes you know that. But he knows how much your parents mean to you, and he would never want to make you choose. That’s selfish of him. 

You look up at him and smile. “You know I love you, right?” 

He smiles back. “You tell me everyday.” He bends down, capturing your lips in a kiss. 

Bucky still had a long way to go with his recovery, but you made everyday easier. He couldn’t imagine his life without you anymore. You were the reason he got out of bed everyday, the reason he cared for himself, the reason he smiled. 

Who knew Godzilla could fall in love?

[darlingpetao3]

Miss Independent (Nash Wells x Reader)

Rating: T

Summary: You’re a tough and independent and oftentimes stubborn member of Team Flash, almost to the point of self-sabotage. But when Nash Wells pops onto the scene and beats you in a fight, you refuse to accept any form of help from him in the latest Team Flash mission.

Tag List: @fandomdancer​ @bluesclues-1234​ @blogforhoes​

You’ve always been a do-it-herself kind of girl.

In school, when you carried your books to class, sometimes boys would ask to carry them for you.

“No thanks, I’m good.”

And there’s always that one item at the store that’s on the top shelf, just out of reach. A fellow customer or a stock-boy will check to see if you need assistance in reaching the pesky missing piece of your grocery list.

“Oh, that’s fine, I got it,” you’d say, and proceed to scale the shelves and channel the essence of your stretchy teammate and friend to reach it.

You may even reach a new level of stubbornness when you decline to accept help to carry said groceries up and into your downtown Central City apartment.

“I’m nearly there, thanks though!”

And you by no means need a man to save you.

Since the infamous Particle Accelerator explosion of 2015, and subsequently gaining your new-found abilities, you can do it all yourself. You can take care of yourself. Team Flash has lovingly dubbed you Miss “Indy” Independent.

Of course, one night of working your second-job as a vigilante for smaller crimes (muggings, corner store thefts, that kind of thing), you come face to face with a man who will turn your life upside down.

As if it hadn’t been turned upside down already.

***

You’re patrolling a different section of the city than usual tonight, near the Ivo Labs building, when you spot a figure in the alleyway at the side door to the premises. You press your fingers to your domino mask to make sure your identity is secure for this upcoming bust.

“Hey, you!” you shout. “Get away from there!”

Fully expecting the tall shadowy figure to flee, you are surprised to find the opposite. In fact, they step out into the dim light of the street lamps. It’s a man. It’s…

Oh hell, it’s another one.

You catch him stash something into one of his pockets. So this Wells is a thief. Huh… that’s different.

You’re still not going to take it easy on him.

“Whatever that is,” you call out, making careful advancements toward him, “you better hand it over.”

“Let me guess, ‘or else?’” This new, apparently cocky Wells replies. You laugh.

“You better believe it.”

“I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

“Then you’re in for a world of hurt.”

You break into a run, effectively charging Wells the Thief. Only, what you didn’t expect was for the man to shoot a grappling hook at a fire escape up above. He uses the propelling motions to fly over your body and land on the other side of you.

“Neat trick,” you say with a growing annoyance. But why don’t you fight me for what you took like a real man?” To emphasize the figurative throwing down of your gauntlet, you get into fighting stance and put up your dukes.

Wells walks back towards you, not even attempting to leave the situation. You can already tell this one loves a good fight. Hell, maybe they all do. This ought to be good.

You throw the first punch - pulling back tightly like a master archer - and letting it fly. What should have been his face, your knuckles meet his palm as he catches it.

How-?

“Gotta do better than that,” he says. You continue to throw a flurry of punches, all of which this Wells manages to block. And then, on your last one, disarms you and renders both your hands incapable of moving.

“You have beautiful eyes,” Wells remarks. “Are you married to that mask, or…?”

“Shut up.”

By hooking a leg around his you get him to stumble down to his knees, but he lunges at your middle and knocks you both down to the ground. Luckily, your head didn’t hit the pavement, but the crash is still not at all pleasant on the ol’ tush.

You take your chance and attempt to rifle a hand into the pocket you saw Wells stash the mysterious stolen object. Only…

“Call me old fashioned,” Wells says with a sideways smile, “but I’d rather you buy me dinner first, my dear.”

After being momentarily confused, you realize what you are rooting around for in his pocket is not, in fact, the thing he stole.

“Give it to me, now!” you demand before you’re forced to use resort to using your special abilities on this crook. This Wells’ eyes twinkle with mischief.

“Sorry Beautiful, I’m not that kind of guy.” The pair of you scramble to get up and just as you lift your hands to power up your energy blasts, Wells flashes the item he stole at you. He shoots you a wink. “Rain check?”

Suddenly, there’s a loud noise, followed by a dense fog of smoke. You run into the haze, hoping that didn’t just happen - that a thief didn’t get away from you. You’ve fought big bad metas! How could you lose against a cocky, ability-less, cat-burglar with second rate magician’s tricks?

Still stunned at your failure, you head home for the night while replaying everything about the fight in your head until it nearly drives you mad. You can’t believe you lost. You never lose! Consider yourself clocking out of this night shift. You hope you see that bastard again because when you do, you’ll be ready. 

And he’ll regret the day he messed with you.

***

“(Y/N), meet Nash.”

You can’t believe it.

You cannot believe Barry is introducing you to him.

“You.” Your voice seethes with disdain. Of course this Nash, the Wells from that night that shall not be referenced, lights up like the sun at seeing you. He points in your direction.

“I’d know those eyes anywhere,” he says smoothly. “How’ve you been?”

“You two already know each other?” Cisco asks, scanning you both on opposite sides of the main monitor desk. You give a flat “no” the very second Nash says “we sure do.”

“‘Know’ is such a strong word,” you explain vaguely. “You know he’s a thief, right?”

“Yeah, he kind of helped us with our own heist…” Cisco says.

Great, so now we’re thieves?

“Anyway,” Barry continues hastily, “we’ve come up with a plan to catch Pinstripe at last. But there is a catch…”

“Let me guess. I serve as a distraction?” It would only seem fitting. You happened to have had a brief relationship with Pinstripe, one of Central City’s biggest gangsters. To be fair, though, this was before he ‘made it big,’ so to speak. You had no idea so long ago that your boyfriend at the time would become a heinous villain.

“Actually…” Barry scratches the back of his neck. Oh, great. “You’d be the bait.”

Welp, this might as well happen.

“Okay,” the word comes out as a sigh. “He’s been trying to track me down for years anyway. Just let me know the when and where and I’ll get it done. I’ll bring him down.”

“We’re going to send Nash in with you,” Barry tells you, “to keep you safe. Meanwhile, Frost and I will-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” you interrupt your friend. “I don’t need anyone, let alone him to keep me safe.”

“I can help,” Nash steps in, “I have experience in-”

“-No, thanks. I got this all on my own. I don’t need your help.”

The Wells doppelganger holds his hands up in surrender. Barry and Cisco’s cringing expressions don’t go unnoticed as they exit, leaving you with Nash. As if to dissolve the extremely palpable tension, Nash leans against the wall.

“So, how about that dinner?”

***

You should have figured your ex-boyfriend would have shot you.

Really, the blast from his top of the line energy rifle nicked your shoulder, but it still hurt like hell. Part of the sleeve of your jacket has a singed hole. You could probably see the smoke coming off of it if you weren’t booking it up the stairwell of this office building. Pinstripe must have seen you dart inside…

“You won’t get away from me this time, (Y/N)!” the gangster calls up to you.

You press a finger to the comms in your ear. “You guys, I’m leading him to the rooftop.” There’s no reply. “Guys?” Well, shit.

Pushing through the exit door on the uppermost level, you keep running until you reach the ledge. You need to think fast. Maybe you have enough energy stored up for a good blast at Pinstripe? You have to try.

Pinstripe, with his suit that matches his Cisco-given villain name and slicked-back hair, he finally swaggers through the door. He’s no longer in a rush to capture you. There’s nowhere to run for you and still no sign of Barry or Frost.

“So, it’s come to this?” Pinstripe asks with a gross smirk. “Running away from our love again?”

“You’re a bastard. And I don’t love you.”

“Tell you what? You get away from that ledge, come home with me, and I won’t shoot you?”

“As if.”

You thrust your hands forward to let loose one of your energy blasts from your hands, but nothing happens. You have no stored energy left…

Pinstripe raises his rifle and aims. “I gave you a chance.”

Just then, your comms short-circuits in your ear, taking you by surprise and causing you to stumble back and hurtle over the edge. But an exhilarated shout grows louder, and before you know what’s happening, something catches you mid-fall. And now you’re… swinging through the air?

“Aw, (Y/N), are you falling for me?”

Looking up, you find yourself in the firm grasp of Nash Wells. The man smiles at you, but you are still in shock. You’re finding it hard to breathe.

When the pair of you finally touch ground again, Nash makes sure to set you down gently.

“Are you alright?” he asks you.

You do a quick self-check. “Yeah, yeah I think so.”

“Indy, are you safe?” Barry’s voice chimes in your ear. The comms are back online, it would seem. “We’ve captured Pinstripe. I’m taking him to Iron Heights.”

“I’m safe,” you confirm. “...Thanks to Nash.” The Wells beside you smiles at the recognition. “Seriously, thank you. I’d be pancake if you hadn’t…”

“Don’t worry about it.”

A wave of guilt and realization washes over you. “Listen, I’m sorry for biting your head off before. I was just bitter at having lost to you that night. See, I never lose. Apparently I’m on a downward streak.”

Nash simply nods, letting you get everything out.

“I was blind before, but now I know it’s okay to have help from others. Especially when you’re about to die!” You laugh awkwardly. “I don’t know why it took me so long to see it. I’m on a team, and I haven’t been acting like it.” Now you’re talking more to yourself. You proffer a hand to your saviour. “Welcome to Team Flash, Nash.”

“Thank you.”

You know, now that I think about it, this guy’s not half-bad looking...

“So,” you start, “how about that dinner?”

~

Requested by @emilyfandoms​: So the readers personality is more of a do it herself type of girl. She doesn't need a man outlook on life because she can do it herself. She is a strong meta and knows how to handle herself even without her powers. So on first meeting Nash maybe they get into an actual fight and she ends up loosing which she gets super salty about it and can't stand Nash after that with his cocky personality and all. So once he finally( flirty with her) joined the team they have to use her as bait to catch a villain who is specifically after her. She ends up getting hurt and Nash saved her literally sweeping her off her feet afterward. So she falls for him then because she never had a man actually save her and yeah she wanting some Nash booty after if ya get what I mean. 🍑 👀 😏

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you take lessons for anything? No.

Has something really heavy ever fallen on you? No, thankfully. 

If you wear makeup, what colors do you usually wear? I haven’t worn any makeup for like 3 years now.

Does your shower have curtains or a glass door/wall? One does, the other has glass sliding doors.

If you have more than one pet, do they ever get jealous of each other? I only have one pet.

Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in? No.

Do you remember the last question you were asked? What did you answer? “Is there a room in your house that you don’t like going in?” and I said, “No.”

Besides salt and butter, do you put anything on your popcorn? There’s this delicious garlic parm popcorn seasoning one of my local theaters offers that’s really good. You can actually get it at the store, which I have.

Are you lonely? I feel lonely in what I’m going through right now. 

What’s your favorite magazine to read? I haven’t read a magazine in several years.

Do you like pineapple? No.

Have you ever seen fireflies? Yeah.

Have you ever trespassed? No.

Do you tell your parents where you are going? I don’t go anywhere now except for doctor appointments, which my mom takes me to, but back when I had a social life and friends and actually did stuff I always let my family know I was going to be hanging out. It didn’t matter that I was an adult, that’s how my family is with each other. We don’t give a play by play, but it’s just nice to let someone know.

Do you raise your hand or participate in class? Ugh, I hated the classes that required that as part of your grade. 

Do you like visiting the mall? Why or why not? I used to. 

Have you ever purposely hurt an animal? No!

Would you ever see a therapist? Yes. I’m actually supposed to call Monday and finally set something up. 

Are you afraid of heights? Yes.

Are you afraid of the dark? I don’t want to be out and about at night and I have to sleep with my TV on for both light and sound.

Are you a jealous person? I can be. I haven’t felt jealous in quite a long time, though.

When is your birthday? July 28th.

What are you listening to right now? An ASMR video.

Have you ever been caught doing something you weren’t supposed to be doing? Yes.

Are you still friends with someone from kindergarten? I just have Facebook “friends” that I’ve known since kindergarten.

What is the most important thing to you? My loved ones.

Do you like whipped cream? Yeah.

Are you close to your mother? Yes, she’s my best friend.

Are you close to your father? We don’t have the same kind of relationship my mom and I do, but we don’t have a bad one or anything. It’s just different.

Do you walk around bare foot when you're at home? Or do you wear socks? I always have socks on.

Do you like chocolate popsicles? I did as a kid. I haven’t had one in such a long time.

Would you ever be your school’s mascot who wears that costume? No.

Would you rather see the Great Wall of China or Big Ben? Both would be an awesome experience.

Have you ever written a poem? I dabbled with it in my teens. It’s so cringe.

Would you ever be a tornado chaser? Uh, absolutely not. I’d be trying to get as far away as possible.

What is your favorite thing to eat with bbq sauce, if you even like that stuff? I very rarely use BBQ sauce, but it’s good with chicken tenders.

Your parents tell you that this summer, you get to pick the vacation. Where do you plan to go? I wish I could have a relaxing beach getaway. In the perfect scenario we’d be able to rent a beach house and have our own private beach area where I could rent a canopy bed and lie out at the beach. That’s what I need right now.

What do you think is a good theme for a prom? *shrug* My prom was over a decade ago now, I’m not thinking about that stuff.

Have you ever had to do a class in summer school? I had to take a math class in 6th grade because I missed a lot of school due to a long hospital stay after a surgical procedure and then I had to retake a math course once in community college. I also took some summer classes voluntarily as well at community college to speed things up a bit.

Do you get nervous when you go to the doctor? About what? Always. I just expect the worst all the time.

Have you ever been to the rainforest? No.

Have you ever created a website? Just like on those websites like freewebs or whatever it was called back in the day for fansites. It was just website that let you make your own simple websites.

Ever thought about writing a book? Yes.

Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone? No, but I’ve had nightmares where I’m being chased, attacked, and even shot at. 

Do you ever make up stories in your head and wish they come true? I mean, yeah.

Which is worse: stuffy nose or runny nose? Both suck, but a runny nose can really be a nuisance if it’s bad. I’ve had times where I had to stuff a tissue in my nostril cause it was so bad. Not being able to breathe isn’t pleasant either, though...

Which is worse: Sick to your stomach or sore throat? That’s tough cause I have a lot of stomach problems and it’s absolutely awful. I very rarely get sore throats, I don’t even recall the last time, but having it hurt when swallowing is not fun and swallowing is something you continuously do, so it’s not exactly something you can avoid. I also feel like there’s not a whole lot you can do about it either. 

Do you think your last relationship was a disaster? I wouldn’t say a disaster. 

Have you ever solved a Rubik’s Cube? Nope. I’ve never really given it a real try either, I give up quite easily and quickly. 

Who do you think is the easiest to talk to? It’s easier for me to talk to the void in surveys or on Twitter. 

Would you consider yourself to be emo? I’ll always be emo.

Do you have a favourite metal band or do you not like metal? I’m not into metal, but lately the surveys I’ve been taking it’s clear that the creators sure are. It’s likely the same person.

What is your current desktop picture? Alexander Skarsgard.

Thick or thin blanket? I just use a throw blanket.

Who are your favorite bands? Idk man, I haven’t really been into much music lately. <<< Same. I have my favorites that have been my favorites forever and always will be, but I don’t have any new ones or any I’ve discovered recently.

How do you mark through your word search puzzles? I prefer to use a highlighter, but circling with a pen works.

Have you ever sewn something? No.

What did you eat for dinner last night? A Lean Cuisine microwave meal.

Ever been grounded? Yeah.

Have you seen all of the Jaws movies? I haven’t seen any of them.

When was the last time you played cards? (not on the computer) It’s been a few years.

Have you ever drank Cherry Coke? Yeah. That was one of my favorites when I was younger.

Have you ever had a black eye? No.

Have you ever eaten a bug? Never voluntarily, that’s for sure. I don’t want to think about the times I unknowingly have. *shivers*

Do you like pranking people? No.

Did you ever take a cooking class in school? No.

Do you celebrate St. Patrick’s Day? Nah. On that day my mom just makes corned beef and cabbage, mostly cause my dad loves it. I don’t care for it, though.

Do you use Skype? No. 

Have you ever participated in local magazine cover girl searches? No.

Have you ever been called a skank/slut because of the way you dress? No.

Is your ex sexually attractive to you still? I haven’t seen him in like 5 years. He doesn’t post photos of himself on social media either so I honestly have no idea what he looks like now.

Describe the most romantic moment you’ve ever had. I don’t feel like it right now.

Have you ever cheated on a test? No.

Have you ever been to couple’s counseling? No.

How often does your employer ask you to work overtime? I don’t have a job.

Did you often read for fun when you were a kid? All the time. I’ve always loved to read.

When was the last time you were scared? I’ve been really stressed and nervous about some health related things.

What’s your favorite song by Rihanna? I like several of her songs. Can you speak binary? No. I know absolutely nothing about that.

Would you rather live somewhere that had hurricanes or tornadoes? Neither, thanks. 

Have you ever had a pet that you disliked? No.

When was the last time you saw hail? It’s been several years, actually. 

What is on your mind right this second: A lot of things.

Have you ever given a nickname to your pet(s)? Uh, yeah. Countless nicknames.

When was the last time you shaved your legs? It’s been awhile. Hair doesn’t really grow there for me, so.

Do you ever try free samples at the store? Not usually, but I have. Especially at Costco.

Do you like boys with long hair? My personal preference is short hair.

Do you like root beer? I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with Root Beer. I used to not like it at all, then I could tolerate it if that’s all there was and I wanted something, and then there have been times where I’ve actually wanted it and enjoyed it, so. *shrug* It was never a first choice, though. 

What is the best fast food place, in your opinion? I’m gonna count Wingstop as fast food. 

Do you have faith in yourself? No. :/

[thisisthepartwhereyou]

BEASTARS MINI-STORY #4: “A Different kind of Charity pt. 3” by JCL

--- OGUMA: "Well?" Juno blinks, but remains composed despite this unexpected development. JUNO: "Yes, yes I am. I am Juno." OGUMA: "I am sorry, I forgot introductions. I am Oguma." He then glances at Shigure. OGUMA: "And this is my assistant, Shigure." Shigure gives a curt bow without saying anything. Juno gives her a nod. OGUMA: "Are you enjoying your evening so far?" JUNO: "Well I just got here, but I have to say it is really quite something. How about you?" OGUMA: "It is as it always is." Juno discreetly examines Oguma. JUNO: "..." (Louis said he was adopted, but they have a similar feel to them) One thing in particular that she takes notice of is his eyes, which has her fixed with a sharp and unreadable expression. JUNO: (Their eyes and their tone of voice... It's like they're perceiving you from atop a great height) OGUMA: "Forgive me for being direct, but I need to ask you something: Are you the person that my son meets with twice a month?" We can see that this catches Juno a bit off her guard. JUNO: "Yes... Louis wants to keep tabs on the school and the progression of the club in his absence, so I keep him updated." OGUMA: "Is that all you do?" Juno thinks back to what Louis said to her earlier: 'You're here as my platonic friend.' JUNO: "That is mostly what we talk about when we meet." OGUMA: "Mostly?" Juno looks a little uncomfortable, thinking back to the moment when she held Louis hand and flirted with him. Oguma's hard stare does not help the situation. JUNO: "Yes." (What is this, an interrogation?) "Usually over some tea and something to eat... He has not mentioned any of this?" OGUMA: "He has, though usually without much detail. He never mentioned that you were female for instance." Juno looks down, trying to hide her growing anxiety. JUNO: (Or the fact that I was a wolf I bet) "I guess he didn't view it as an important detail." Oguma examines Juno. OGUMA: "Oh, I think he does." JUNO: "Well I... I..." (How the hell do I even respond to that?!) It is then that Louis comes into frame and joins Juno. He greets his father and his assistant. LOUIS: "Father. Shigeru." Juno looks relieved beyond words. JUNO: (Oh thank God!) Shigeru nods at Louis and Oguma greets his adoptive son. OGUMA: "Louis." Oguma examines Louis suit. OGUMA: "A red shirt huh? I never would have guessed that it was such a complimentary color on you." LOUIS: "Well, I wanted to match my company somewhat." He refers to the see-through shoal draped around Juno's shoulders, which has a shade of red. Oguma nods. OGUMA: "I see." Nobody says anything for a few seconds. Both Juno and Shigeru feel the weight of the awkward atmosphere. JUNO & SHIGERU: (Uncomfortable!) OGUMA: "I need to greet some old associates. I hope to see you again later." LOUIS: "Same here." Oguma turns to Juno, giving her a curt little bow. OGUMA: "It was a pleasure to meet you Juno."   JUNO: "The feeling is mutual, sir..." Oguma then proceeds to walk away together with Shigeru. Louis sits down in his seat and leans over to talk to Juno. LOUIS: "Did he scare you?" --- Once they're out of hearing range, Oguma talks to Shigeru. OGUMA: "Shigeru, find out all you can about that young lady. Her background, her activities at school, the circles she hangs around in. Anything that'll paint up a clear image of her character and her precise relationship with my son." Shigeru adjusts her glasses. We can see a great determination burning in her eyes. SHIGERU: "As you wish, sir." She proceeds to pick up her tablet, apparently starting with her search righ away. Oguma closes his eyes and looks a little self-conscious. OGUMA: (I hate to dig around in Louis private life, but if I had been more concerned about his activites at school, or at least more involved as a parent, he might have still had both of his legs) He looks back in Louis and Juno's direction. OGUMA: (What I don't understand is, having lost a leg to them, why does he always surround himself with carnivores?) We zoom in and see that Juno is talking to Louis about something. Louis smiles a reserved but completely genuine smile. OGUMA: (He said that he sacrificed his leg to help his classmate, a wolf. Now he is together with another. A young, well-mannered and attractive wolf of the opposite sex at that) Staring at them over his shoulder, his eye narrows a bit. OGUMA: "..." (Could she be the reason?) --- We skip ahead a bit. Louis and Juno has gotten their ordered meals by now. JUNO: "I mean he was perfectly civil, but it felt like he was staring into my soul or something." Louis gives off a little laugh as he picks up some salad and feta with his fork. LOUIS: "Yeah, I know all about that. When I was younger I was afraid of misbehaving, cause it felt like if I had done something bad, he would know about it, just by looking at me." Juno smiles at this. JUNO: "My big brother Hector is like that too. He can be downright terrifying if he thinks that you're up to no good." Louis look a bit surprised. LOUIS: "You have a brother?" JUNO: "Three of them actually. Though they're actually my half-brothers, from my mom's previous marriages." Louis nods at this with some thought. LOUIS: (Marriages? As in plural?) "Doesn't it get pretty rowdy with so many siblings?" JUNO: "Oh like you wouldn't believe! Though they're good boys whenever they try. Overprotective as hell though. I tell you, if they knew where I was right now anyway, they'd probably hunt us both down." Louis looks like he understands this; the confirmation that at least Juno's family has a normal degree of intolerance in regards to herbivore/carnivore-relationships. LOUIS: "They wouldn't approve of you having dinner with a herbivore?" Juno picks up her knife and fork with an annoyed look, thinking about her brothers. JUNO: "Knowing them they wouldn't approve of me going out with any guy, no matter the kind of vore. I'm the youngest, so they always baby me. They probably think I'm too immature to date." She then takes a bite from her omelette, at which her face suddenly turns into cartoonish deligth with stars for eyes and her tail wagging intensily. JUNO: "THIS IS SO DELICIOUS! OH MY GOD!" Louis sweatdrops at Juno's overly excited expression.   LOUIS: "What about your parents?" The mention of her parents seem to quell Juno's excitement a bit. JUNO: "If my mom knew that I was in love with a herbivore, she'd probably have a fit. She's the biggest worrywart." She takes a sip from her orangejuice.   JUNO: "I don't really know my dad. He left when I was like five. From what I've been told he wasn't exactly father-material." This prompts a curious look from Louis. LOUIS: (Quite a tumultous family history... Is that why she was sorted into the drama club?) Louis thinks back to the other members of the club, which has all been selected and drafted for the drama club on account of their troubled backgrounds. --- We see a group-image of all the members with cracks over it, as if seen through a broken window. LOUIS: (No, that couldn't be it. Having a mother that has been married a few times and a couple of halfbrothers sounds pretty mundane compared to the history of the rest of the clubmembers. Though what could it be?) --- Going back to the present, Louis continues to stare at her, curious but reserved.   LOUIS: (I want to know, but I can't ask her, in case it is very personal) Juno then puts her glass down. She now looks down with sad eyes. JUNO: "I don't like lying to them though, even if it is to spend time with you. It makes me feel like I'm sneaking around." LOUIS: "... You lied about where you were going tonight?" JUNO: "Uh-huh." LOUIS: "If they don't know that you're out here, where do they think you are?" Juno looks up. JUNO: "I told them that I was going with the rest of the dramaclub to Shima over the weekend. Bill is taking the guys out there to his uncle's beach house. I was planning to join up with them tomorrow." Louis blinks at this. LOUIS: "Why is he taking you out to Shima?" JUNO: "Because it's been a tough time lately. It hasn't been easy with the club getting suspended, and all the pressure that is now on us to keep it going." --- JUNO: "The herbivore members are picked on for intermingling with carnivores, and carnivores are picked on for intermingling with herbivores." We see a flashback of the all-herbivore basketball team picking a fight with the members of the dramaclub. Bill is held back by Aoba and Pina as he wants to fight with the smug-looking team captain, while a scared-looking Els looks on. --- We ten return to the present with Juno and Louis. JUNO: "Not even the teachers seem to have our backs. It's more like they see us as the troblemakers. Bill just figured that we could use some time away together. You know, just hang out and not feel like a bunch of freaks for a while." This makes Louis look a bit thoughtful. LOUIS: "I never did anything like that back when I was the president... Then again, Bill has different sensibilites than me." JUNO: "You wouldn't like to come too?" This makes Louis nearly choke on a cherry tomato. He looks at Juno, who gives him a hopeful look. He then closes his eyes and takes another bite from his salad. LOUIS: "I don't think me being around would change much." JUNO:  "Oh don't say that. Everyone misses you." Juno gives his hand a playful poke with her finger and blinks at him. JUNO: "Especially the girls." Louis clears his throath and looks away. LOUIS: "It wouldn't feel right." Juno looks a little surprised by his odd reluctance. She takes her glass up for another sip. JUNO: "Why not? It's just old friends." LOUIS: "That is the issue though. Back when I was president, I looked out for them, did everything that I thougt was right for the club and the school." Louis puts down his fork and crosses his hands. He looks down with a dark look. LOUIS: "But truthfully, it wasn't because it was the right thing to do, or because I really cared about them." Juno looks shocked at this and lowers her glass. LOUIS: "All I cared about was myself and becoming the next Beastar. Every little speech I made, every performance and all the concern I showed, at it's core, wasn't out of the goodness of my heart. It was all about asserting myself, standing out and getting the support I needed." Louis looks down, a joyless smile forming on his lips. LOUIS: "See... In a sense, I was no different from most of the people here: doing good things for the self-serving reasons. I don't really deserve to call any of them my friends. To be honest... My kindness back then was just charity." *CRACK!* Louis looks up in surprise. We see that Juno's glass has been broken in her hand, with juice and shards spilling down on the table. Tears have formed in the corners of her eyes. JUNO: "You're horrible..." Juno the pulls her hand back, realizing that she is hurt. JUNO: "Ow! My hand!" Blood trickles from inside her palm and drips onto the table. Louis swiftly gets up and walks over to Juno's side with a concerned look. LOUIS: "Are you alright?" Juno grimaces in pain and holds her hand. JUNO: "It hurts...!" LOUIS: "Let me have a look." Louis takes her hand, opens it gently and takes a look.   LOUIS: "There is glass imbedded in your hand." He grabs a napkin from the table and wraps it over her hand a well as he can. LOUIS: "The kitchen staff always have bandages. Let's go." Juno gets up though and glares Louis straight in the eye. JUNO: "I can take care of it on my own." Juno walks off while holding her hand, leaving a stunned-looking Louis behind. JUNO: "I don't need any of your charity." As she walks away, we can see that she and Louis are receiving a few stares from others in the restuarant section. ???: "Well that was dramatic." --- We then see that the unknown voice is coming from DUMAS (Peacock, male, 23 years old, black suit, foppish), who is sitting at a table a few meters away, opposite Georgette. Apparently he is her ´idiot-date´. Georgette has a glass of Chardonnay in her hand, while Dumas is eating from a plate with vegetarian spring rolls. The two are among those staring at the little spectacle that just occured. DUMAS: "Though I guess one should expect as much. I mean dogs and the like are quite emotional, not to mention lacking when it comes to a gentle touch. I bet even the females have hands like plyers. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would want to bring any of them as company." Georgette seems to ignore Dumas ignorant ramblings, taking a note of Louis regretful expression as he grabs Juno's veil, which she has left on her chair. DUMAS: "I mean if they're here and not carrying a plate, then what is the point?" Georgette continues to stare at them with a sharp look, but also with a hint of intrigue. TO BE CONTINUED...! ---

[engekihaikyuu]

Hyper Projection Engeki Haikyuu

Prince of Stage vol. 9 - Interview Translation with the new Karasuno cast!

======

Part 3: The Third Years Sawamura Daichi: Higano Shou Sugawara Koushi: Ichinose Ryuu Azumane Asahi: Fukuda Yuuya

=====

Full interview translation and more photos under the Read More! Please do not repost my translations or scans.

Please give us a highlight or something to watch out for in the upcoming play. Higano: I feel very strongly that the biggest thing to look forward to in this play is our completely new Karasuno cast.  Because the characters have in their reality spent all this time together, I think we have to show on-stage a real sense of teamwork and that team atmosphere between us.  And then I’d really love for people to look for those little details in our relationships and our gestures and mannerisms. Ichinose: As we’re rehearsing, I find it super fun and interesting to work on how to present scenes on stage that don’t even have my character in them.  Because we do all the extra parts too, like the random people that are walking in a crowd.  If people pay attention to those parts too, then they can find us and think, “Oh it’s so-and-so!” and then I think they could have even more fun. Fukuda: Shou-kun's already said it, but this is our first production as the new Karasuno cast so I think one of the things to look for is our team’s atmosphere and closeness.  And then of course because it’s a production with volleyball as the main theme, I would love for people to enjoy things like our rhythmic breathing, the tension, and the realism during the match.  

Please tell us something about how you relate to your characters. Higano: Sawamura Daichi has that serious and strait-laced atmosphere.  Evidently, people have that impression of me.  That I seem really steady. (laughs)  But in reality, I’m not like that at all.   Ichinose: Are you okay?  To say that. (laughs) Higano: I’m fine.  People usually say to me, “At first it was hard to talk to you.”  That was true for you too, right? Ichinose: That’s true.  Are you purposely trying to put out that kind of aura?   Higano: I’m not doing it on purpose, but it seems that I just do.   Fukuda: You’re overflowing with it.  (laughs) Higano: Even if I’m really not upset, at rehearsals whenever I cross my arms and put on a serious face, people will just say to me, “Oh I’m sorry.” Everyone: Hahahahah! (laughs) Higano: Even though I’m not mad at all. (laughs)  For other productions I get to appear in, I’m very often the leader, or the person in charge, and this time I’m the captain obviously.  So I feel like I’m pretty close to Sawamura in that sense. Ichinose: I had a time in my life where I played volleyball, and I think I really enjoyed it and kept doing it because it’s really fun to score points during a match.  I think that Sugawara has such an incredible kindness to be able to keep being this nice senpai to Kageyama, who joined the team as this genius setter and took his position.  Even though he can’t be in matches, he’s doing what he can for the sake of the team, and I think that’s really amazing.  I’m not sure I could do the same.  I’m the type to quit the team if I can’t be a regular.  So I have to learn by his example.  But we are similar in that we both get carried away and end up just messing around sometimes! Fukuda: I think that Asahi-san and I are pretty much polar opposites.  I’m the type that likes being boisterous.  But what we have in common is appearance, and we’re pretty much the same height.  So I think we have pretty similar physiques.  And I’m also very bad with ghosts and bugs.  This is just my assumption, but I think Asahi-san is also bad with them. (laughs)  I think we might be linked in that way.  

If you could pick a favorite character within the series, who would it be? Ichinose: I love my own character of course, and like I said earlier, I really respect that he can behave in a way I can’t.  Aside from Sugawara, I like Noya-ssan.  When I played, I was a left wing spiker, but the setter and the libero really save the team.  Lastly, the Ace is the one entrusted with the toss, and the libero will pick up all kinds of plays.  Since Noya-san can combine these positions he definitely is the guardian deity of the team and you feel really reassured to have him around.   Fukuda: If we’re talking about Karasuno, I like Nishinoya and Tanaka and Hinata... I love how fiery they are!  And how direct.  They also get a lot of the more famous lines from the series, but yeah I really do love the characters that get depicted as being very passionate.  They can touch the hearts of anyone, even people who aren’t into sports, and I’m always attracted to those types.   Higano: My favorite is Asahi-san. Fukuda: Ohh! Higano: Even though Asahi gets discouraged, he does get back up and move forward when supported by his teammates... I think I can really sympathize with that.  I think people who get discouraged, who hit a wall in their progress, are definitely strong.  If they can then overcome it, I mean.  And because of that I think Azumane is a really wonderful character.  He feels especially human in that sense.

Please tell us a story from your rehearsals. Higano: Whenever we have time to spare, we’re dedicated to playing volleyball. Ichinose: That’s for sure!  Even during breaks we’re always holding and passing balls. Fukuda: Normally we rehearse for 1-2 hours and then take a 10min break, and normally you’d rest, or use that time individually for whatever, but everyone just picks up a ball instead and goes at it.  It’s kind of impressive. Higano: During rehearsals, I think it’s really great how everyone will discuss and explain their opinions and ideas.  For the younger ones, I would normally think it'd be difficult to speak plainly if the senpai are around.  I grew up in a very sports-oriented environment, and the senpai were definitely scary beings.  But at rehearsals, the more experienced people are more informal and we’re the type to want to be more unified.  Because of that, I think it’s an environment where it’s probably easier for the less experienced of us to voice their opinions.  And because I’m in the position of captain, I want to accept everyone’s opinions and of course be assertive with my own. Fukuda: At rehearsals everyone always makes sure to properly greet each other, and do the obvious without being asked to, and I think it’s really great.  When you look at any two people who are talking, people are always looking their partners in the eyes and listening intently.  Although if it’s Shou-kun, he might have a scary face or whatever. (laughs) Everyone: Hahahah! (laughs) Ichinose: It’s not just Karasuno, everyone plays volleyball together without really paying attention to our designated teams, and people from different teams will give me advice, and I’m really grateful for it.  Even if you’re together on the same team, there are things that you miss.  Since I used to play volleyball, I’d like it if I can give advice on that front. Higano: This wasn’t during rehearsals, but yesterday the three of us went to dinner together.  I think the majority of our conversation was about the play. Ichinose: Well we’re happy to be able to talk about the play over dinner and stuff.  Is there anyone who hates doing that?  Who’s gonna say, “Just do that at rehearsals?”  I think it’s pretty necessary.  So I’m really happy that we get to do it. Higano: Among the third-years I think all of us all like talking a lot so we talk about a lot of different things, not just the play.   Ichinose: Just recently we were talking about how huge the bugs are in Hokkaido. (laughs) Higano: I was really terrified.   Fukuda: When we tried looking them up on our phones, they were shockingly big. (laughs)  Shou-kun just went, “I don’t wanna look, I don’t wanna look at it!”   Higano: I’m so bad with bugs, I’ve had to call an ambulance twice. Ichinose & Fukuda: Ehh?! Higano: I really can’t believe I’m talking about this but... when I was in high school, I went to a friend’s house, and we went into this store-house type room, and we moved this luggage that had been stored in there forever and... this cockroach came out and started flying in circles around me.  And then I started hyperventilating and that was the first time.  The second time, I was walking around the Arashiyama bamboo grove in Kyoto, and above me a crow flapped its wings.  At the same time, something fell, and then there were all these caterpillars on me, so I hyperventilated again.  In this group, I’m confident that I probably hate bugs the most. (laughs)

What were your first impressions of each other, and your impressions of each other now? Higano: Ryuu hasn’t changed that much from when I first saw him.  He doesn’t really have a hidden side, and he feels kind of like a little brother. Ichinose: I’m the one that’s a bit more removed in age* so the two of you really feel like adults to me.

*Shou and Yuuya were born in 1991, but Ryuu was born in 1997.  

Higano: How cute. Fukuda: Definitely cute. Ichinose: They really feel like older-brother-senpai.   Higano: Yuuya feels more like, how should I say it, the same type as me?  He looks tough, so when you first meet him you might think to yourself, “If this guy were to get angry, it’d be pretty scary,” but in reality he’s not like that at all.  He’s really friendly, he sort of calms down the place, that’s the kind of atmosphere he can create.  So in that respect, my impression of Yuuya has really changed. Fukuda: ….I’m a bit embarrassed now. Ichinose: Yeah Yuuya-kun was scary at first, but after going out to dinner and messing around, I could see another side to him, and my image of him has changed too.   Fukuda: Shou-kun definitely left a strong impression, because when he’s not talking, his eyes are really intense. (laughs)  Am I being monitored?  Kind of like that. (laughs)  But when you talk to him, he’s so gentle and just really really nice.  He has that older-brother disposition.  And contrary to what he looks like, he can be lamer than you can even imagine.  Just recently when we were riding the train he tried and said, “That was a joke just now, did you get it?” because I couldn’t pick up on the joke. (laughs) Ichinose: He’ll just do it so suddenly and smoothly. (laughs) Higano: Yeah.  A little too smoothly sometimes that nobody will follow up on my joke, and then I get a bit embarrassed. Fukuda: My impression of Shou-kun now is that if you can talk to him even once, he’s very easy to become close to!  The first time I met Ryuu, he didn’t talk at all. Ichinose: I’m not great with strangers... Fukuda: Well I’m the same way. (laughs)  But now when I try to talk to you, you can talk quite a bit.  At a glance, he doesn't seem the type to talk much, so it sort of felt like he didn’t have any interest in people.  But in reality he likes to talk a lot and he’s quite sociable.  He’s very cute. Ichinose: Yay! Fukuda: In conclusion, everyone is wonderful. (laughs)

Please give one final message to people who will be going to see the show. Higano: One of the themes for this production is “connect,” and there’s not a single one among us that wants to do this half-baked.  As captain, as an actor, I want to charge ahead at full speed.  I hope that everyone looks forward to it. Ichinose: Personally, I really love the manga, so I do have my uncertainties about becoming part of the new Karasuno generation and being able to connect with the production that I’ve watched all this time... but I’m trying not to worry about it and instead I hope to rely on giving my all into having fun!   Fukuda: We’re using the format of a stage play, but I would love for people to be able to experience it not like a play and not us as characters, but rather imagine us as real people living out the story in front of them.  So many people have worked on this and we’re going at this with a lot of passion, so I hope that the audience can feel that.  Please look forward to it!  

======

Translated by @nimbus-cloud Please do not repost my translations!  To me, this includes screenshots of bits and pieces taken out of context, especially if they don’t link back to me.

If you appreciate the work I do for this blog and want to support my translation efforts, please consider donating a ko-fi!  (x)

If you’d like to buy the magazine that features the original interview, you can find it on Amazon JP: (x)

[richtea-biscuit]

Thank you @a-fritterer for tagging me. Prepare for a lot of answers in the negative

1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?

It was my mum so I’m confident that she did

2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?

No, 18 is slightly on the young side. Plus, I had to deal with many of them at uni last year and it made me realise what a difference 3 years can make

3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?

Probably never, if I’m going to have mixed feelings about something, it’s not going to be that mix

4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?

I do if I accidentally make eye-contact just to be polite

5. Is there someone who’s mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

I’m not dating anyone so no

6. Have you heard a song that reminds you of someone today?

Yes, a song my grandad loved came on shuffle

7. What exactly are you wearing right now?

Gryffindor pyjamas

8. How often do you listen to music?

All day, every day

9. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?

Jeans

10. Do you think your life will change dramatically before 2014?

Wow, you can really tell the age of this game. In hindsight, I would say my life has changed, I feel like I know myself much better which has made me a lot happier. Even when life isn’t going great, at least I know who I am and no longer feel lost in my own body and mind

11. Are you a social or antisocial person?

I’m pretty social when I’m with people I know and like

12. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with the letter “A”?

Yes, it’s not a pleasant memory though

13. What about “R”?

No

14. Can you drive a stick shift?

Technically yes but not legally

15. Do you care if people talk badly about you?

Yes, I’m pretty paranoid about that. It’s turned me into a chronic people pleaser

16. Are you going out of town soon?

No

17. When was the last time you cried?

Whenever I watched series 2 of Derry Girls. The last episode made me cry, no shame

18. Have you ever told someone you loved them?

Platonically, lots. I tell my friends and family I love them all the time. Romantically, that person whose name begins with A and there are regrets

19. If you could change your eye colour, would you?

No, my eyes are the only thing I’m happy with

20. Is there a boy who you would do absolutely everything for?

Jeon Jungkook lol

21. Name something you dislike about the day you’re having

I feel like it’s been a day of Procrastination because I’m so tired-out from my mum’s birthday party yesterday

22. Is it cute when guys kiss you on your forehead?

I like the thought of it. And I love it in fanfic, it makes me soft

23. Are you dating the last person you talked to?

No

24. What are you sitting on right now?

My bed

25. Does anyone regularly tell you they love you (other than family)?

@penicillinjimin tells me at least semi-regularly

26. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

No

27. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to bed last night?

My nan

28. Do you get a lot of colds?

Yes, RIP me every winter

29. Where is the shirt you are wearing from?

I want to say Primark but I don’t know

30. Does anyone hate you?

Probably

31. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room?

I can drink legally, I do34n’t need to be hiding it

32. Do you like watching scary movies?

I can take it or leave it

33. Do you want your tongue pierced?

Honestly, the thought gives me the ick

34. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be?

If I had to, the year of the “A” but I don’t really want to. I think I wouldn’t be the person I am now if I deleted it, and for the worse because that was the start of a very long journey of realising I was asexual. I think that about all my experiences, good and bad, they shaped the person I am today

35. Did you have a dream last night?

No

36. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

My mum yesterday

37. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

And not push away and guy that pays attention to me out of fear? lol

38. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

Not anymore they don’t, I made sure of that

39. Do you think someone is thinking of you right now?

The person reading this? Am I funny yet?

40. Did you have a good day yesterday?

Yes

41. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?

No

42. In the next 48 hours, will you hang out with a girl?

No

43. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

No

44. What’s the best part about school?

I loved learning but I didn’t like the other children

45. Do you have any pictures on your Facebook?

Other than my profile picture, they’re all about 5 years old because I hide from cameras

46. Do you ever pass notes to your friends in school?

Do people actually do that?

47. Do you replay things that have happened in your head?

I try to surpress it

48. Were you single over the last summer?

I’m the hopeless romantic that’s forever alone

49. Is your life anything like it was two years ago?

Not really

50. What are you supposed to be doing right now?

Whatever I feel like

51. Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?

No, I don’t waste my time like that. I waste it in infinite other ways instead

52. Are you nice to everyone?

Even when I don’t want to be. I just can’t be rude

53. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

Friend-wise, yes

54. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

Definitely yes. Even if I weren’t asexual, it would be yes. I absolutely despise cheating. My friend cheated on her boyfriend once and we had a massive row about it because she didn’t like that I wasn’t on her side

55. Are you good at hiding your feelings?

Yes, I cover them up with other feelings. It’s my special skill

56. Do you think you like someone?

It’s very hard for me to tell. It requires a 10-page thesis for me to work these things out. Not that it really matters because like I said, I get scared and turn into a bitch to push people away

57. Have you ever kissed someone whose name begins with a “J”?

Yes - spin the bottle. I got dragged into it

58. Do you prefer to be friends with girls or boys?

Boys. I think that’s more because it’s what I’m used to from when I was at school

59. Has anyone of your friends ever seen you cry?

Yes

60. Do you hate anyone?

No, I get fairly apathetic

61. How’s your heart?

I’ll ask it. “Hey heart, how you doing?” It says da-dum

62. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about?

Yes

63. Have you ever cried over a guy

Yes, I was an idiot.

64. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?

Nobody I can think of

65. Are your toenails painted pink?

No

66. Will your next kiss be a mistake?

I hope not

67. Girls love it when boyfriends cry, correct?

I feel like “love” is the wrong word. Boys should be encouraged to show their emotions though, crying is good for you

68. Have your trousers even fallen down in public?

No

69. Who was the last person you were on the phone with?

My mum when we were in proper lockdown

70. How do you look right now?

A face only a mother could love. It’s bedtime so there’s no make-up and my hair’s a mess

71. Do you have someone you can be your complete self around?

No

72. Can you commit to one person?

Yes

73. Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?

No

74. Have you ever felt replaced?

Yes

75. Did you wake up cranky?

No

76. Are you a jealous person?

Yes, I try to keep a check on it though

77. Are relationships ever worth it?

I like tot think that they are, but maybe fiction has given me an idealistic view point

78. Anyone you’re giving up on?

No

79. Currently wanting to see anyone?

My friends

80. Name something you have to do tomorrow?

Brush my teeth

81. Last person you cried in front of?

I actually don’t remember

82. Is there someone you will never forget?

Many

83. Do you think the person you have feelings for is protective of you?

Yes, Jungkook is my man and he is protective of all ARMY (I’m joking, don’t worry I’m not crazy. Just spicing my answers up)

84. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

85. Are you over your past?

Is anyone ever? Like I said before, I think it’s all important to who I am now so I keep key elements of it fresh in my mind as reminders to not make the same mistakes and let myself get hurt like that again

86. Have you ever liked one of your best friends of the opposite sex?

Yes

87. Is there anyone you can tell EVERYTHING to?

No

88. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

I don’t know about “true love” but if the person I thought I loved came to my door, I would tell them to fuck off

89. The last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM, do you let them in?

It’d probably be an emergency and we’re not on bad terms as such so yeah

90. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

No, they hating came later

91. Will you be in a relationship in two months?

I highly doubt it

92. Is there anyone you know with the name Michael?

My mum’s friend

93. Have you ever kissed a Matthew?

No

94. Were you in a relationship in January? How was it going?

I was emotionally invested in my relationship with the Jungkook photocard I had on the wall next to my bed. It was at head height when I sat down so when I was going through tough times, I would talk to it so I didn’t feel so lonely. It was an amazing listener lol. And it’s answer was always “love yourself” and I’d say “You’re right as always. Thanks Kookie” (I swear I’m not crazy)

95. Were you happy with the person you liked in march?

Same as January

96. Is the last person you texted attractive?

Objectively speaking I think @penicillinjimin is very pretty. I don’t find her attractive but that’s nothing personal

97. Who do you have texts from?

Domino’s (with discount codes, it’s true love)

98. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

Ok?

99. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

No

100. Who’s in your profile picture with you?

It’s just me

101. Ever kissed under fireworks?

No, fireworks are there to be seen guys

102. Has anybody ever given you butterflies?

Yes

Tagging whoever wants to do it

[vcls]

look !! it’s valencia ‘v’ rivera !! she’s my favorite c-list stylist with  192k followers, even though she’s only twenty-six. i heard she can be undemonstrative and impatient, but i think she’s illustrious and passionate. when i first saw her, i could’ve sworn she was ursula corberó, but i’m sure she’s heard that before.

BASIC INFO.

FULL NAME: valencia rivera.

BIRTHDAY: september 14th 1994

ZODIAC: virgo

NICKNAMES: v, rivera, val ( by friends ), valencia ( parents ), cia ( by her sister )

HEIGHT/WEIGHT: 5′8, 130 lbs.

TATTOOS:  a few placed all over. working on sleeves

BASIC STYLE:  androgynous, more masculine than feminine, alternative

USUAL EXPRESSION:  resting bitch face or resting confused face

TRAITS: +illustrious,  +passionate,  -undemonstrative,  -impatient.

FEARS: letting her family down .

AESTHETIC: messy hair, under eye bags, takeaway coffee cups, scuffed up shoes, kind heart, unsent letters, 2am phone calls, late night adventures, long drives, worn leather jackets, doc martens.

TRIGGERS: negative mentions of her family, specifically her parents and sister

BACKGROUND & PERSONALITY.

valencia comes from a very loving home. she knows she’s incredibly lucky to have the family she does, her parents are still madly in love with each other and she couldn’t ask for a better relationship with her little sister. they are her world. 

growing up, the family were just comfortable. some months were better than others money-wise but they knew that no matter what they’d be okay because they had each other. 

as a child she found it a lot easier to get along with boys than girls. she enjoyed the adventure and play style most of the boys around her had rather than the girls. like imagination games and moms and dads was fun sometimes but she loved play fighting and getting muddy more... a thing that drove her mum a little bit crazy but she wouldn’t change valencia for the world!

gender norms weren’t a thing that val stood by either. she loved ‘boy things’ like playing sports, fighting, watching games with her dad and just being rowdy but she also liked playing dress up, giving makeovers, baking with her mom and being sensitive. 

all her life, she knew she was different. she could agree with her sister about the cute boys in their magazines and on tv... but she couldn’t picture herself ever marrying one. her sister would have crushes on various boys at school and v never found herself feeling anything. it all soon became clear though. and her name was sarah. 

from the age of 10 to 15, val and sarah were best friends and she was wrapped around that girl’s finger. they’d do everything together and quite clearly adored each other. it was so clear to everyone except val and sarah however that val’s adoration was a lot more than just from the perspective of a best friend. and it wasn’t until sarah had to move away that val realised her true feelings. she was heartbroken. the two girls wrote each other all the time but val never felt right confessing her true feelings to her friend. there had been a few times where she’d tried to write it out but always decided against sending them. 

she told her family about what she’d realised. she was a lesbian. they all took it well, her happiness being their only priority. her sister was a little bit taken back and took a little longer than her parents to come round but she was only 13 and didn’t totally understand the whole thing. 

being the 2000′s, being gay brought a lot of bullying and homophobia her way. older family members in spain even writing to her parents to tell them they need to ‘get her help’ to which her parents kindly told them where they can shove their opinions and let her continue to find herself. a lot of the girls at school treated her like she had some kind of disease and would refuse to be around her which made her feel like shit as you can imagine but she always pushed through with the support of her family. 

eventually, she came across a group of kids who didn’t treat her any different and supported her, some of them even being the same or incredibly similar to her. they opened her up to a lot of new things. new styles, new adventures, new music. and she loved it all. this group is why she is how she is today. they taught her about androgyny, about doing what you want and not giving a fuck about anyone else and about always being open and welcome to other people, even if you don’t totally understand them at first. 

all these years, one thing about herself had stayed consistent. she’d always loved a good makeover. she was the one her friends came to for their hair and makeup for parties/dates and she’d be the one they came to for style advice and she loved that! she showed a lot of promise, as told by her drama teacher who often recruited her for help with costuming and styling for school plays. so as soon as she was able to, v went to beauty school and grew her talents. 

never in a million years would she have thought this would get her to where she is today, stylist to the stars! and an incredibly popular one at that. fame isn’t a big deal to her though, she just happy to have a good job in an area she loves and being in a position to help her family out. 

relationship wise, val has always dreamed of having a connection like what her parents have but so far, her few short lived relationships haven’t exactly shown much promise. sometimes she jokes that she’s terrible at picking girls since they all either only like her because she has access to celebrities, only like her because she has a little bit of fame they can use or they’re just not great people! she still secretly holds out hope though.

v has gained herself a bit of a tough outer shell after all these years of dealing with rude celebrities, catty competition and just general homophobia. some find it hard to get close enough to truly know her beautiful personality but those that do know they have a friend for life in v. 

in her spare time she likes going to sport games, experiencing l.a, drawing and painting and occasionally going out with her friends. she’s very into politics and often attends protests, this isn’t something she usually talks about though like she prefers to just do stuff than talk about how she is going to or has done something.

her professional name is v rivera so to the majority of the people at shine, they would only call her v or rivera. she likes to save ‘val’ for her close friends, who are also welcome to come up with their own nicknames and ‘valencia’ is something only her parents call her (or sometimes her friends when she’s in trouble) and ‘cia’ is something only her sister has ever called because she struggled to say valencia when she was a toddler.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

sarah (this name can change): the girl who has always been a ‘what if’ in val’s mind. perhaps they lost touch and stopped writing to each other after a while? maybe they still write each other but just haven’t crossed paths again? maybe she also had feelings for val but was too scared to say anything or maybe she saw her purely as a best friend and we can find out her reaction to knowing the truth? maybe they could now be industry rivals and have to deal with the dynamic of their once best friend being competition? so much choice!

her sister: these two are as close as can be. they’ve had each other’s backs from day one and val would die for her sister no questions asked. 

best friends: your muse is one of the few in the industry who took the time to break down val’s walls and get to know who she truly is. you see the weird and wonderful things that go on in her brain and also the fire in her heart and embrace it all just as she embraces everything about your muse. ( would be open to probably 2 or 3 )

industry rivals: hollywood is cutthroat and there’s always someone better. these two have been head to head for a while. maybe they admire each other’s artistic ability and use that to better themselves? maybe they can’t stand each other and always want to one up the other out of spite? maybe they’re really good friends and a bit of healthy competition never hurts? maybe they were once good friends but the competition pushed them apart?

“boyfriend/husband”: this is valencia’s boy best friend. he’s her boy and if she were straight she’d marry the fuck out of him. they probably get each other valentine’s day gifts and make jokey relationship posts about each other on their socials. they have a lot of love for each other. they always wingman each other and bro out whenever they can. i also like to imagine val practising make up looks on him if she can’t picture how it’ll look on an actual person.

idk what to call it: they love to work with each other. so maybe an actor/singer/model/etc who whenever they’re given the choice will always ask val to be their stylist and if she’s available, val will always do it because they’re one of her favourites. they probably have a good vibe together and enjoy each other’s company and if they spent more time together would be great friends but maybe due to work they’ve never had the chance before?

ex-girlfriends: this has so much opportunity for plots and backstory so if you’re interested in this then we’ll have to talk about what went down and why things didn’t work.

exes who can’t seem to let go: (i’m v inspired by this song and need a plot like it) maybe they broke up because things weren’t working but they decided to stay friends because even though the relationship was wrong they still care about each other. and they keep trying to move on but everytime they see each other, something ends up happening even though they both know it probably shouldn’t.

flirtationship: maybe her and a straight girl or her and a boy or even her and a gay girl... they probably both know nothing’s going to happen but they enjoy flirting with each other. where’s the harm in flirting?

enemies: these two just don’t vibe together. it’s not a thing, it doesn’t work. backstory can be worked out but yeah, they’re really don’t get along.

[the-rebel-archivist]

OC Interview: Raynda Lavellan

NAME ➔

Raynda Lavellan. Or, rather, Rutherford, but you don’t have to use that, it’s still pretty weird to me too. It’s sort of like giving up part of your identity, right? But it’s also so comfy and homey.

[‘Raynda’ doesn’t seem like a traditional Dalish name, is there a story behind that?]

No.

ARE YOU SINGLE ➔

No, quite the opposite, as one might gather from the whole name thing.

ARE YOU HAPPY ➔

[She smiles and turns away before answering]

Ridiculously, stupidly happy. For such a long time after I… lost… my arm, I wasn’t.

[She traces the pattern engraved on the metal arm on her left without looking down]

It’s easier when you have someone looking out for you.

ARE YOU ANGRY ➔

I mean, I try not to be. It’s a remarkably unpleasant emotion and I’ve had enough of it. So many people in my clan were fueled by it; even I was to a large extent. I still have a short temper.

Sometimes I get angry when I think of former friends who turned out to be different from what I thought they were. Ultimately I think that people see themselves as good and try to do what they think is right, it’s just that that can conflict with what someone else thinks is good, so it’s important to look from their perspective before blowing up in anger. I don’t really know if I  even believe in an objective good, you know? Sorry, I’m a little off topic.

ARE YOUR PARENTS STILL MARRIED ➔

Yes.

[She has an impassive look on her face, interrupted by amused flashes of what looks like her thinking about whether or not to say what’s on her mind.]

They’re also dead, so there’s that. But they died married, so I’m not a bastard, which is cool.

EIGHT FACTS BIRTHPLACE ➔

Somewhere in the Free Marches, I’m not really sure where seeing as I wasn’t in a state to remember the location at the time. We moved around a lot. I know we’d recently moved away from Wycome, where my father had disappeared, but I don’t know where the clan went.

HAIR COLOR ➔ 

You seem to have a working pair of eyes - they’re a nice colour, by the way - so you tell me. And don’t give me any of that ‘ginger’ or ‘’auburn’ bullshit, it’s just straight up red.

EYE COLOR ➔ 

Alright, I’ll give you this one, because people tell me that they change depending on whether I’m inside or outside. When I see them they’re blue, but I’ve heard green a lot as well. Because Cullen is fancy he sometimes goes with ‘aquamarine’ or ‘sea green,’ but I’m not particularly pretentious so I usually say ‘greeney-blue.’

BIRTHDAY ➔ 

Sometime in Drakonis, I don’t know the exact date. I’ve always liked it because it happens right when the snow is melting and spring is in the air and the birds are flying back after winter. When I first started celebrating birthdays I picked the 15th because it’s smack dab in the middle of the month.

MOOD ➔ 

My mood right now or generally? Right now I’m really pretty neutral. Generally I’m… also pretty neutral. 

GENDER ➔

Well this should be self-evident, or are you trying to insult me? Don’t… don’t mind me, I’m just going to be in the corner weeping.

I’m a girl.

[She laughs]

SUMMER OR WINTER ➔ 

Oh that’s a tough one! They really do both have so much to recommend them. I think I have to go with winter, even though I do so love the sun in the summer, since winter means curling up in blankets and drinking hot tea in front of a fire. For some reason Cullen never joins me in the blanket, but oh well, his loss, more blanket for me, and he seems content enough in the freezing cold wasteland that is the blanketless living room.

MORNING OR AFTERNOON ➔ 

Morning, easily. The sun is just coming up and it’s lovely. Plus you feel like the day is so much longer! EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE ARE YOU IN LOVE ➔ 

Very much so.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT ➔ 

You know, I do. Although I’m not entirely certain that it was love at first sight as much as attraction at first sight. Helps when the person you’re falling for is easy on the eyes. Love at first speak, maybe? We had a great conversation about bows and it was the most engaging and delightful conversation of my life.

WHO ENDED YOUR LAST RELATIONSHIP ➔

I’d rather not discuss it, but me.

HAVE YOU EVER BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART ➔ 

This isn’t really a line of questioning I’d like to pursue. Probably a lot of people’s, probably not all romantically.

ARE YOU AFRAID OF COMMITMENTS ➔ 

Of the concept, no, but I haven’t really been in any place long enough to get committed. Not even to an asylum, though Creators know sometimes I think I belong there.

HAVE YOU HUGGED SOMEONE WITHIN THE LAST WEEK? ➔ 

So many people. What can I say, I’m a hugger. Do you want a list? Because I can’t remember a list. If there’s a person around I’ve interacted with I’ve probably also given them a hug. Do you need a hug? You sort of look like you do.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A SECRET ADMIRER ➔ 

When I was about fourteen, someone kept leaving me these really ridiculous love notes in my quiver. I still don’t know where they were from, I used to find them and laugh about them with Tam. They were the dumbest things, stuff like we can run off together, your eyes shine brighter than veilfire in the dark… He always said that we had to burn them after, I didn’t quite understand why.

It was Tam, wasn’t it.

Damn.

Well, now I feel bad.

HAVE YOU EVER BROKEN YOUR OWN HEART? ➔ 

How about we change the subject? SIX CHOICES LOVE OR LUST ➔ 

Why not both? If they must be separate, then love, but the best love has some lust mixed in there. 

LEMONADE OR ICED TEA ➔

Tea is hot, isn’t it? I like hot tea, though I’m not sure about how it would be cold. I should try it! So, uh, lemonade I guess.

CATS OR DOGS ➔ 

I like them both! Cats have a special place in my heart though, the way they’re social but on their own terms. They seem  solitary, but can be so good at keeping one company.

A FEW BEST FRIENDS OR MANY REGULAR FRIENDS ➔ 

A few best friends. I’d rather have a smaller number of real relationships with people who actually care about me.

WILD NIGHT OUT OR ROMANTIC NIGHT IN ➔ 

Night in, hands down. Although I do enjoy a good party, especially one that isn’t too crazy so that I can hear the people around me speaking.

DAY OR NIGHT ➔ 

I like them both - I mean, have you looked at the starry sky at night? Gorgeous. It’s so sparkly. But the sun is warm and bright, like a hug from the universe, so day. That’s my final answer. FOUR HAVE YOU EVERS BEEN CAUGHT SNEAKING OUT ➔ 

Oh, fuck yes, do you know how hard it is to sneak out of an aravel? Pretty freaking hard. 

There was this one time at the last arlathvhen I went to when I went to meet a boy in the woods and… well, maybe I shouldn’t tell this story. It was a pretty good time until the rabbits.

Tam’s mom was so mad. She wanted to make me sleep outside, but, well, that wasn’t much of a punishment so for the rest of the arlathvhen I had to sleep closest to the wall. It was hot.

[She laughs and looks down]

Good times.

FALLEN DOWN/UP THE STAIRS ➔ 

It’s really embarrassing, but both, more times than I can count. It got so bad that Cullen insisted we find a house with only one floor. I had a permanent bruise on my shin from falling up the stairs at Skyhold. What, they were an awkward length and I kept trying to go up two at a time! Think of all the valuable seconds I saved. When I didn’t trip like an idiot.

WANTED SOMETHING/SOMEONE SO BADLY IT HURT? ➔

I don’t know, can you get me my arm back? Haha, I’m just kidding. Or am I.

WANTED TO DISAPPEAR ➔ 

Wouldn’t you want to if everyone kept asking you what to do and you had no sodding idea what the best path was? FOUR PREFERENCES SMILE OR EYES ➔

Smile. A smile brightens up someone’s whole face. It’s also so much fun to make someone who doesn’t smile much burst out laughing, it’s like a ray of sunshine.

SHORTER OR TALLER ➔ 

I like people to be taller than me, with at least a good five inches of clearance, but honestly it doesn’t matter much. If I truly care about someone height isn’t important.

INTELLIGENCE OR ATTRACTION ➔ 

Oh, intelligence. I can appreciate a pretty man well enough and they’re good for some things, but for anything deeper I need someone who can make me think, you know?

HOOK-UP OR RELATIONSHIP ➔ 

Relationship. I’ve done the hook-up thing enough and it only leaves you lonely. Plus you can work on really tailoring your in-bed experience to your preferences in a relationship, constantly iterating on concepts and what not. Lots of iteration. Yup. FAMILY DO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY GET ALONG ➔ 

I assume you mean my clan, not my dead parents, but either way the answer is no. Cullen’s family is great though, they’ve really adopted me. They’re so… warm. I thought it was normal for families to be distant. But Mia’s more of a hugger than I am!

WOULD YOU SAY YOU HAVE A “MESSED UP LIFE” ➔ 

Maybe once I would have.

HAVE YOU EVER RAN AWAY FROM HOME ➔ 

Slept in the forest, yes, but I wouldn’t have run away. When you only have familiarity with one small group it’s hard to break out of that. Like, money - what do you do when you know how to barter but barely know the value of a coin?

HAVE YOU EVER GOTTEN KICKED OUT ➔

Let’s just say learning the value of a coin was the easiest part of a pretty rude awakening. FRIENDS

DO YOU SECRETLY HATE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS ➔ 

Absolutely not, if I hated someone I wouldn’t be friends with them. Sometimes people can get on my nerves, I’ll admit.

DO YOU CONSIDER ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS GOOD FRIENDS ➔ 

Yeah, I really do.

WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND ➔ 

Definitely Dorian, he’s persistent and won’t let me not be his friend. He makes me laugh so hard, and my fashion sense has really gotten an upgrade from being around him. Sometimes I look in the mirror at an outfit and just think, ‘Thanks, Dorian.”

Also did I say he’s funny? He’s uproariously funny.

Sometimes I want to twist his moustache just to annoy him. I do it, but I want to too. He hates it. But I think he also secretly loves it.

On a more serious note, he has a unique perspective and I’m pretty sure he’s the smartest person I know. He probably should treat me like an idiot in comparison, but he doesn’t.

WHO KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU ➔ 

Cullen. If there’s anything he doesn’t know about me it’s because I’ve forgotten about it or it’s just never come up, but he knows me like nobody else does.

[the-blind-assassin-12]

I See You: Part Five

A/N: As you get ready to hear what Billy has to say, both of you go through some of the last conversations you had. *this one contains a prompt from @littledarlinhavefaithinme ‘s “10 Marvelous Things I Hate About You” challenge. Prompt is highlighted*

Warning: Language, violence, tiny bit of lemon zest. 

Word Count: 3,920

Crimson leaves fluttered and fell from the sugar maples that lined your street, the sun shining through them like stained glass before they touched down on the cobbled sidewalk. The crisp September air made you shrug a little more deeply into the thick cable knit scarf that Lexi had given you for your birthday- along with a bottle of vodka that she’d helped you finish- but the below average chill did nothing to douse your spirits. You paused to lean down and tie the laces on your boots, adjusting your phone between your ear and shoulder so you could carry on your conversation without interruption.

“Can’t you send me somthin’ romantic next time? Why’s it always gotta be these deep, dark, melodramas?”

You rolled your eyes even though he couldn’t see as you finished with your laces and straightened up, taking your phone back into your gloved hand. “Because, Russo, you asked me to help make you seem cultured, not cliche. If all you want is some lukewarm, watered down garbage, just quote Romeo and Juliet at her. Chicks dig that bullshit.” You could picture him biting his lower lip to keep from laughing, that devilish look in those coal black eyes that you’d seen the first night you’d met. “But if you really want to impress a woman, you’ll show her your mind, Billy. So I’m sending you stuff that will make you use it.” You grinned preemptively, running your tongue along your top lip as you prepared to deliver your next line. “You’re the one actually choosing to read what I send you, ya know?”

There was a part of you, although you were perfectly content to keep Billy as a friend, that secretly hoped that he was reading all the books you sent him because it was you that he was trying to impress. You knew there were plenty of fly by night floozies and paper doll cut outs to occupy his empty hours, and that didn’t bother you. You knew he didn’t feel anything for them, knew he was only trying to keep an acceptable amount of booty calls on rotation by keeping them interested enough to put up with the extreme lack of commitment that Billy put into any of his “romantic” endeavors. But you’d be completely lying to yourself if you said you hadn’t at least thought about what it might be like to have something more than friendship with him. You reached the end of the block and stopped with a small group of pedestrians waiting for the signal to change.

“Yeah, yeah, you got me there,” you heard him expel a burst of air through his nose in a snarky, one-of-a-kind Billy Russo laugh. “Just sayin’, it’d be nice if you sent me somthin’ less...I dunno, serious?”

You mentally ran through the last few books you’d sent him- Wuthering Heights,  Frankenstein, and the one sitting on your kitchen counter, boxed up and ready to send to his next deployment in Kandahar, The Picture of Dorian Gray. Shit, he’s got a point. “What have you got in mind then? Any of these girls you see recommend any great works of fiction?” The light changed and the group of people around you started to move forward into the crosswalk on Charles Street. “You want me to send you one of those trashy romance novels with Fabio on the cover?” An older woman a few feet to your left caught your question and made a face, and you looked down to see a book sticking up out of her bag. swirling violet lettering reading Ravaged and the unmistakable luscious hair of the model you’d just mentioned in jest were just visible and it was clear from her scowl that she didn’t appreciate you deeming her literature of choice as “trashy”. You mouthed a “sorry” and shrugged at the disgruntled woman and choked back the giggles that were desperate to burst forth.

“The last one... Ashley?”

You pulled the phone away from your ear and rolled your whole head with a dramatic groan.Of course he doesn’t remember her name. Her bra size though, bet he remembers that. “Allison, Russo, her name is Allison. C’mon write ‘em down if they’re so hard to keep track of. Or, and stay with me here, ‘cause this one’s a doozy...you could actually get serious with one of them. Cut down the list of names you have to know.” You know my name, Billy.

“Right. Allison.” He ignored everything else you’d said and you wondered if he ignored Frank when he gave the same advice. “She suggested Hemingway, said he was-”

“Romantic? Hemingway? He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who squandered half of his life hanging around Picasso trying to nail his leftovers. Sounds like Allison knows about as much as you regarding the classics. You two are made for each other.”

Again he ignored the relationship advice. “Hey, Picasso probably had some good leftovers.” You heard a zipper being pulled closed and the soft thud of his fist hitting the full duffle like a punching bag. He’s all packed up, I probably only have a few more minutes…

“Billy,” your tone shifted as you came to another corner, turning right down Mt. Vernon Street, lined with beautiful red brick buildings, bright shiny front doors, and carriage style lanterns. It wasn’t as busy; there weren’t as many shops and cafes as there were on Charles Street, so there wasn’t as much foot traffic. You took advantage of the less crowded sidewalk to stop and lean against a concrete stair rail to finish your conversation. “You know you deserve more than leftovers…” Over the years you’d lost count of how many times you’d tried to convince him that he deserved much more than what he allowed himself to have.

There was a pause on the other end of the line and you dared to hope that he was thinking about what you’d said- that maybe the ten thousandth time would be the charm. But before that hope could swell too much, he poked a hole in it with his response. “I dunno, cold pizza makes for a pretty good breakfast.”

You squeezed your eyes shut, unable to keep your mind from shuffling through millions of moments before it reached the one and only time that Billy Russo had spent the night at your apartment, and the pizza that you’d shared both for dinner and as your first meal the following morning. You recalled walking out into your living room to see him sprawled on your couch, one long leg hanging down onto the floor, one muscled arm bent and thrown across his face. The soft pewter blanket that you’d given him was tucked up beneath his chin, his dark hair spread out over the white couch cushions. You remembered how peaceful he looked then, and how your heart had turned to cement and dropped through your ribs, wishing that you could flop down onto the couch with him. You’d wished that you could climb beneath the blanket and waste the morning in his arms, showing him what it felt like to be with someone who cared for him. You opened your eyes and you were back on Mt. Vernon Street, a maple leaf caught in your scarf. Plucking it out you realized that a good 6 seconds of silence had passed, and Billy was repeating your name.

“You still there? This fuckin’ service…” his voice sounded distant as he pulled the phone away from his ear to check if he’d lost the connection. “Keeps dropping out, you there?”

“Yeah, sorry, Billy, I’m here.” You cleared your throat. “Breakfast pizza. Right.” The leaf fell from your fingers as you tried to recover quickly. “Just saying, pancakes and eggs and bacon makes for a pretty good breakfast, too, Russo.” You deserve more than stale pizza crust.  

“You’n Frankie, I swear you’re tryin’ to turn me into some soft, domestic type.”

The laugh that slipped out wasn’t forced or faked at all, and you were glad that the awkward moment was over. “That what you think of Frank? He’s a softie?”

Then it was Billy’s turn to chuckle. “Hell no, not Frankie. Toughest son of a bitch I ever met.”

“Besides yourself,” you stood up straight, taking a step away from the railing that you’d been leaning against, and resumed walking.

“Besides myself, that’s right.” He repeated, and you could hear the grin you imagined he was wearing. You heard rustling on his end and knew he was shouldering his overstuffed duffle, and then another few seconds of silence. You knew he was heading out the door, knew he only had a minute or two more before he had to leave or else he’d be late, which was completely unacceptable. But you also knew that he hated ending the conversation, so you knew you would have to do it for him.

“You all set over there, Marine? Headin’ out?” You knew you had no right to feel the tightness in your chest that you felt, knew that you were already missing him, missing his voice more than you should, but there really wasn’t much you could do.

“Yeah, just about,” he’d answered quickly , and you knew he was grateful.

“Alright then, Russo, you take care of yourself, you tough son of a bitch.” Stay safe, Billy. Stay safe, come home.  

He laughed. “I will, always do.” You heard his front door open, heard the jingling of keys in his hand as he pulled it closed to lock it up. “Lookin’ forward to your next terrible book recommendation.”

“Ha. You know, one of these days I am gonna send you a flouncy Fabio novel, and then we’ll see who’s laughing.” You suddenly felt the chill that had been in the air the whole time, as though talking to Billy had kept it at bay, and now that the conversation was ending, it was back. You sniffed, rubbing your nose with one hand. “I’ll talk to you soon, Billy.” You had a rule, when either of you left on a deployment, and that was that you didn’t end a call with “goodbye”, both of you hating the way it sounded. When you were both stateside and as safe as any civilian was, “goodbye” wasn’t a problem. It was a different story when gunfire and bombs were involved, when there were rockets digging craters and IEDs buried in the sand, or submarines gliding below the deep blue depths, threatening your aircraft carrier with silent missiles.

“Talk to you soon,” he answered, and you knew that as soon as he could, as soon as he was settled and had a free moment and an internet connection, he’d fire off an email to you. He hung up then, because if he didn’t the call would never end, and you knew it, too. You took a deep breath of autumn air, and pocketed your phone. I’ll miss you, Billy Russo.

That had been one of the last real conversations you’d had with Billy… with the Billy that you knew. The last deployment had changed him, had been harder, different from the rest. His emails were short and lacked the sarcasm you’d come to expect. The few times he’d been able to call you he’d sounded deflated, exhausted, and not just physically. As you led him to the park in silence under the city lights, you wondered how those changes had affected the man you’d come to love. You’re still in there, Billy, I know you are...

.  . .  . . .  .

Billy had spent his entire shift shuffling through every conversation he’d ever had with you; every laugh he’d caught through the phone line, every picture you’d sent while at sea, every single time he’d thought about you since he’d deleted your number. He’d smirked at the security camera on his way to the time clock, knowing that Frank had access to it, making sure he showed up when and where he was supposed to. But where normally he’d spend the night mopping bathrooms and banks, seething about what Frank and Lieberman had reduced him to, tonight he’d been consumed with you. What to tell you, what not to say, what to ask and not to ask… wondering if it could possibly ever go back to the way it was, if you could ever possibly forgive him… if he even deserved your forgiveness. A vivid memory took hold as he dumped the mop bucket and finished up at his final location for the evening.

Billy’s breath was hot as he lowered his mouth to one thigh. His lips and tongue and teeth trailed towards his destination as his hands found the soft flesh of the ass that had been driving him crazy all night. A few strands of hair fell out of place as he looked up, dark eyes on fire, to enjoy the view before him. His vision was blurred from the bourbon, but his hearing worked just fine. He grinned as he flicked his tongue against the slick heat at the apex of the legs his head was lost between, the soft moan of his name urging him on. “Billy… oh, fuck…”

His eyes rolled back as that bimbo’s voice was replaced with yours in his mind, and he increased the pressure he applied with his tongue. Ashley? Allison? Fuck it doesn’t matter… she had her hands in his hair, holding him in place, and he groaned, imagining your fingers gripping and tugging instead. He slipped his tongue into her, dreaming of what you would taste like, and the thought alone sent him for a spin. Finally, completely spellbound by his secret desires, he turned to kiss her thigh, but it was your name that fell from his lips. And it wasn’t the first time, either.

She stiffened, instantly pushing away from him and sat up, a look of pure disgust etched into her carefully painted on face. “Are you fucking kidding me, Billy? Fucking again?” She pulled her legs back from over his shoulders and stood from the bed, scoffing as she tossed her long blonde hair and shook her head. She bent down to retrieve her discarded clothing and started getting dressed.

Billy just sat up, a complete lack of guilt, embarrassment or whatever Allison thought he should be feeling clear in his eyes. He shrugged and shifted so that he was leaning against the headboard, reaching for the phone on his bedside table. I could call her… tell her I’m back…

He’d called you as soon as he’d had his boots back on U.S. soil, but he hadn’t told you that he was back. “Gettin’ out of this hell hole in two weeks,” he’d said while he drank a coffee in his kitchen. “Can’t wait to get the fuck out.” Pinching the bridge of his nose, he lied through his teeth. Fuck, this is hard. He’d always been able to bend the truth to suit his needs before, but not with you, and he felt his stomach turn.

“Two more weeks? That’s not bad, Marine. You and Frank taking care of each other?” He heard the tingling sound of a spoon clattering into the sink and guessed that you’d just made yourself a coffee, too.

Billy set his mug down and rested his forehead in his hand, raking it back through his hair. His mind immediately went to that night, in that tent, after that mission had lead them straight into that ambush resulting in the greatest loss to their unit that they’d ever suffered.

“Did you complete the mission?” Rawlins barked the question repeatedly, even while his men bled and suffered- the ones that had made it back, anyway. His clean white shirt and well rested mind didn’t belong in that tent. Covered in blood, some of it his own but most of it Frank’s, Billy sat in silence. Wringing his hands, a dull hum drowning out the noise, he considered things he never thought he would- he considered a transfer to a different unit, considered leaving the military completely. This shit… its all wrong… this isn’t right, not what I signed up for… The abrupt sound of a metal folding chair crashing to the ground as Frank, still bleeding from a gunshot wound, launched himself at Rawlins out of rage as the entitled asshole asked his question again broke him from his thoughts. Aw shit, Frankie. In two strides Billy crossed to where Frank had just landed a brutal punch that punctured the man’s eye socket. He’s gonna fuckin kill ‘em. He grabbed his brother by the shoulders and hauled him into the next room, tossing him through the door.

“You’re gonna fuckin protect him, Bill?!” Frank’s voice was uneven, his eyes flashing. “Sends us into a goddamn ambush when we told him, I told him and you’re takin’ his side?!”

“I’m protecting you Frank. This is never gonna be on him. We’re here to take the fall, Frankie, not Rawlins… and I’m done. I’m out… and you should think about it too.” He left Frank gaping like a big mouth bass, needing to be anywhere but in the room with the words he’d just said aloud.

“Yeah,” he answered your question. “Yeah Frankie’n me got each other’s backs, like always.”

He heard you swallow on the other end of the line before you spoke. “Hey, you okay Billy? Something you’re not telling me?” Shit, she’s too good at this… at knowin me…

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. It’s just…” he rubbed the heel of his palm into his eye. “Things are different this time… just… lookin forward to gettin out, ya know?”

“Okay, well… just keep your head up, Russo. Two more weeks until beers and burgers.” His chest tightened as you tried to reassure him, tried to give him some tiny spark to get him through. I don’t deserve her… she’s … this is why I have to do this, cut her out… she’s too good for my bullshit… “Hey what’d you think of the book I sent?”

“Think it was perfect for me,” he answered, staring out his window at the gray New York City morning.

You’d laughed, and his chest tightened another notch. “It’s about a man who sold his soul to the devil, Billy. You may be dark and mysterious but you’re not the devil.”

Least I got to hear that laugh again. “If you insist… but I did like it… I highlighted a line for you. You’re always highlighting things for me so I did one this time…” the last time.

Behind every exquisite thing that existed, there was something tragic. That was the line that he’d selected, the line he hoped would help you understand; understand that he had made his choice, and that he couldn’t take you with him.

He shook his head, enraged shouts pulling him away from the memory of your last phone call, just a few days before. Allison was still berating him for being a womanizer and an asshole, for using her for sex- I use you because you make it too easy. Yeah, I’m an asshole, everyone knows that, what’s your goddamn point?- but he didn’t care, just scrolled through his phone until he found the photo he’d been looking for, the one from the night that he met you.

The fact that your roommate was perched in his lap barely registered when he looked at it. He didn’t even see Frank anymore. All he saw was the frozen laughter on your face, the happiness captured that night that felt worlds away now, even as he sat in the same city that the photo had been taken in. He used two fingers to zoom in until only you were visible in the frame of the picture. I really fucked up… He never told you, but that picture kept him going on some of the worst days; reminded him that there was at least one person who gave a shit about him, one person that believed in him...one person that saw him for who he really was and kept him in their life anyway, asking for nothing but the same in return. Allison was shrieking his name, trying to get him to pay attention to her as she made a show of gearing up to storm out. Billy zoomed back out on the photo before he pressed delete, erasing your number while he was at it so he couldn’t make any more mistakes with you.

“...knew you were fucked up, Billy, but Jesus. You want to fuck her that bad, go the fuck ahead, see if I care. Then she can feel like shit, too when you forget her name... ”

Rage bubbled up at the thought that he could ever forget you, at the idea that she meant anything to him, anything close to what you meant. He stood, tossing his phone on the bed and advanced on Allison, fists curled at his sides. She took a step back, bottom lip quivering but eyes locked on his. “Don’t you fucking talk about her. You don’t get to say anything about her, you hear me?” His nostrils flared and his eyes flashed. “You mean nothing to me, sweetheart. You’re nothin’ but a nice ass in a tight dress and that’s all you’ll ever be, and ya know somethin’ else? I don’t think this,” he gestured between her and himself demonstratively with his pointer finger, “is gonna work out anymore. Get the fuck out.”

She opened her mouth to unleash more insults, but Billy just gave her a look that shut her up once and for all. “I said get the fuck outta my place.” He growled, and she turned, walking quickly towards the front door, slamming it behind her.  Good. She’s gone. She’d never be you, and he knew that. None of the women he fucked would ever be you. I don’t deserve her… she deserves better than me...better than the bullshit I’m involved in… It sliced at his heart like shards of glass, cutting you from his life so finally, but you’d been the only one who mattered, and he wouldn’t allow you to become a target. Attachments are weaknesses…

He reached your apartment at 9:30 on the dot, and you’d been waiting like you said you would be. “Let’s take a walk,” you’d suggested, leading him down the block with the use of a long cane that you held out in front of you. His heart hammered and his mouth ran drier with every single silent step, as he prepared himself to tell you everything- everything he’d done, every choice he’d made, everything done to him and why he had to let you go. The curved wrought iron fence surrounding the small patch of green that New Yorkers called “parks” came into view, and you walked through it to a bench near a fountain. You took a seat and released a shaky sigh, and it hit him how hard you were trying to keep it together. You took your dark glasses off, folding them and setting them in your lap before turning your face up to his. Your eyes, once bright blue and always shining, we’re now a frosty, icy color, some light scarring around the edges of the right one, and his fingers twitched, aching to reach out to you. “Take a seat, Billy,” you softly requested, patting the bench beside you. “We’ve got a lot to talk about.”

@something-tofightfor @my-little-dumpster-fire @suchatinyinfinity @lexxierave @agent-bossypants @zaffrenotes @songforhema @thesumofmychoices @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @lysawayne @ethereal-heavcns @ymariejp

let me know if you’d like to be added or removed! 

[jharvas]

Character Questionnaire: Jharvas Suvorsath

BASICS -

1. Height?

5′10″. One of the tallest boys back home.

2. Eye colour?

Dark blue, I think? (He’s correct.)

3. Do they need glasses?

Nope. I can see just fine. It’s the communicating thing that I need help with.

4. Scars and birthmark?

None. I’ve been in a few...fights, but I’ve never gotten a scar. Maybe this year? 

5. Tattoos and piercings?

I have a lot. Should I take off my shirt? (He has a lot of tribal tattoos over his shoulders and back and torso. He doesn’t have piercings, though.)

6. Right or left handed?

Right-handed. 

7. Any disabilities? Physical or mental.

I can’t ...communicate without the aid of my familiar, my companion, Kiora. (Kiora’s the black mare that’s always with him. Back in the depths, she took on the form of a giant gray seahorse. On land, she’s a giant landhorse. Get it? Ugh. They were magically bonded by his own tribe when he was still a child after they realized he was never going to develop his voice.)

8. Do they have any allergies?

Nope. I’m allergy-free.

9. Favourite colour?

Blue. Any shade of blue related to the seas or oceans or water. It’s my whole thing.

10. Typical outfits?

Anything comfortable, anything I can run and swim in, really. If it’s easy to take off, I’ll wear it. I do a lot of things on the surface now, but I still end up wanting to be in the oceans, which is probably just a triton thing, so I lean towards clothes I can quickly take off or won’t be a hassle to me underwater. Of course, protection is still paramount, so I have few armor lying around for the exact same use.

11. Do they wear any makeup?

Nope. I don’t need to. (He also doesn’t know how.)

12. What weapon do they use, if any?

I like my spear, though I also have daggers on me as well as a light crossbow I rarely get to use. I mean, why waste crossbow bolts when I can just blast monsters from far away?

PERSONALITY -

13. Are they more optimistic or pessimistic?

Optimistic, definitely. I’ve been through a lot as a kid, before and after my tribe magically bonded me with Kiora, and kids can be cruel at times, so because of all my bad experiences, I’ve pretty much learned to look at the brighter side of things, especially these days.

14. Are they introverted or extroverted?

What’s the difference? Oh. Yeah, I’m an extrovert. Definitely an extrovert.

15. What are their pet peeves?

Hmm. That’s a tough question. I guess...if I have to name one...I’d go with...lines? I hate lines. 

16. What bad habits do they have?

I guess I can be graceless at times? I was never taught how to dance, so, yeah...

17. Do they have any phobias?

I don’t have one, I think? Though I can’t be too sure. Maybe I just haven’t found that out yet.

18. How do they display affection?

Passionately. I am a passionate lover. I like to tell someone I love them, show them how much, and celebrate with them and stuff.

19. How competitive are they?

I can be very competitive. I’m a triton, so I was brought up to believe we’re far superior to other races just because we spent all our time protecting the rest of them from the horrors of our plane, but I’ve seen some stuff and other races can surprise you...which is why I have to prove I’m still better than them. I’m just kidding. I just love the feeling of winning but if I lose, then I lose. No harm, no foul. It won’t be the end of my world. I’m not perfect.

20. If they could change one thing about themselves, what would it be?

Hmm. I honestly can’t think of a single thing to change about me. Maybe my weapon of choice? Spears are nice but three pointed ends would be nicer than one.

21. Do they have any obscure hobbies or routines?

Nope. I’m just a simple guy who likes simple things like beautiful women, protecting them, swimming, maybe a bit of fighting, and...oysters. I do love my oysters. 

BACKSTORY -

22. What are the names and ages of their close family members? Parents, siblings, etc.

My dad’s name is Jenres, and my mother’s name is Loryn. I have a brother and a sister, Jolos and Dhorimyn.

23. Is their family alive and are they still in contact with them?

Still alive, yeah. They’re still back home. Jolos and Dhorimyn have even stepped up to protect our tribe. They’re much better warriors than me, that’s for sure.

24. Where are they from? City, nation?

Our tribe’s settlement is east of Hegaehend, far east, deep within the oceans there. I doubt you’ve heard of it, but it’s called the City of Sh'lafijn. Some call it Marai.  

25. Did they have a childhood best friend?

Yeah, I had childhood friends but I don’t think I actually had a best friend. Wait, no, Kiora... Kiora is definitely my childhood best friend. She was always there for me. She’s the bestest friend.

26. Have they had any pets?

Nope. Kiora’s more of a friend than a pet.

27. Did they grow up rich or poor? What were their living conditions like?

We were smack dab in the middle. My dad was a great fisherman and warrior, and my mom was a witty merchant, so we got by really well. Growing up with two siblings and Kiora was pretty fun, though there were bad times. Still, the good outweighed the bad, so I can’t complain.

28. What is their educational background?

I was trained by the best, taught by the best. I wasn’t the best student but my mentors didn’t have a hard time with me. I learned fast and learned better through experience over books.

29. As a child, what did they want to be when they grew up?

A warrior. A guardian of the depths. A protector. Much like our people of old. I like to think I’m on my way.

30. What advice would they give to their younger self?

It gets better. It always does. Trust in your tribe, in your friends. They’ll keep you swimming.

31. Growing up, were they ever bullied or were they the bully?

I was bullied. On account of needing Kiora to communicate with others. Before her, I was bullied for not being able to communicate. It’s a bad situation either way. But I had my fair share of friends, protectors, people I can trust who helped me out. I’d do anything for them. Everything I’ve done is for them, because of them.

32. Who do they look up to/who is their role model?

My dad, definitely. He’s a great warrior and provider. My mom, too. She’s worked hard all her life. That perseverance is admirable.

PRESENT -

33. Do they currently have a place of residence?

I go where the current takes me. I rent rooms wherever, though I like taverns close by the sea. Arx is a good place for me. I go there a lot, even for just a swim.

34. What is their most treasured possession?

Oh, man. I don’t think I have one, really. My memories?

35. What is their drink of choice?

Bilgewater. Hands down. Best drink ever. (Bilgewater is the bluish-brown, sometimes jet black, concoction that's made by soaking the inner organs of various sea creatures soaking in a fermented brine and then running them through a sieve to remove the bones and viscera. It's on most tavern's menu for around 5 copper pieces a glass. Your friendly neighborhood fisher can also brew it for you for the same price. The only side effect of this drink is that the lingering taste of rotten, brackish seafood remains on the palette for a few hours.)

36. Which king/queen are they loyal to, if any?

I’m still checking the waters. So far, I haven’t really gotten the incentive to choose a side. Maybe when it comes to it, I’ll finally get to decide. But for now? Wherever the current takes me.

37. Have they ever killed anyone?

Yep. Part of the job. Protecting our tribe, people I like... I try my best not to kill but if I don’t have a choice, then I don’t have a choice.

38. What was their last promise and did they keep it?

To never stop growing. I think I’m keeping it.

LOVE -

39. What was their first kiss like, if they’ve had one?

Oh, wow, well, uhh, if I remember correctly, it was...fine, I guess. She was better than me, I think, though it was very straight to the point, just lips smacking and that was it. I don’t recall any hint of passion there, but it was fair for a first kiss.

40. Are they in a relationship/have a love interest?

Nope. Not really looking for one, but if push comes to shove, then I’ll happily shove back.

41. Have they ever been in love?

Once or twice. I was in love with a librarian before but she was too focused on her work. I don’t think she even knew I existed.

42. Have they ever had their heart broken?

Sure. It’s a normal thing, just life. That librarian thing, I guess. Losing a friend in a battle. Stuff happens in life. That’s how you know you’re alive.

SPIRITUALITY -

43. Do they follow a god, if so who?

For a time, I followed Melora. Just because everyone else back home was doing it. But then, Kiora happened, and I never really heard from Melora, so over time, that gradually slowed down. Also, I left for the surface, so it was like forgetting how to talk to tuna, their slang and lingo.

44. What do they think happens to them after death?

Uhh, I guess my body just...decays? Maybe I turn into seafoam or something. I don’t know. I don’t really care. I’d be dead by then, so there’s no use thinking on that.

45. What is their spirit animal?

Kraken. 100% kraken. Absolutely.

[melodiouswhite]

Oh No, Emotions! Ch. 07

7. Training with the flame-headed Cassandra

Edwina came to the training room and warmed herself up for half an hour, just like her agreement with Luise had been.

First the mandatory stretching and breathing exercises, then she moved on to sit-ups and that stuff.

“Alright”, she muttered, “If I don't manage a hundred sit-ups, I'll go fucking bal-”

“Don't overdo it before your combat training”, a foreign female voice interrupted her.

Edwina shrieked in shock and whirled around.

In the door frame stood a red-haired woman, who couldn't be much older than her. She was tall, freckled and overall pretty damn attractive.

“Whoa, calm down! Sorry, didn't mean to startle ya!”, the newcomer cried, lifting her hands in appeasement.

“What the fuck?”, Edwina gasped and clutched her heart. “You couldn't have knocked or something?”

The redhead ignored the reproach and asked: “Are you Edwina Hyde? The new lodger?”

“Uh, yes?”, the brunette comfirmed cautiously.

The other woman grinned: “Awesome! I'm Alma Donovan, Luise's youngest sister! So good to finally meet someone remotely my age! And a girl too!”

Oh. So that woman was going to be her training partner today? And she was really related to Luise? She didn't look anything like – oh wait, she had the same ice-blue eyes.

“Wow, you look just like I pictured you!”, the red-haired woman

Edwina scoffed: “What, you pictured a 4,8ft short, slight brunette with acid green eyes?”

Alma grinned. “Believe it or not, yes!”

The brunette laughed: “Either you're joking or you're crazy.”

“The latter. But that's the lot for people like me. But enough talk! Let's start training! After all, that's what we're here for, huh?”

Edwina sure had a fun training session with the youngest sister of her landlady. The redhead didn't treat her with kit gloves and she liked that. And the taller woman was certainly skilled at street fighting.

“For someone who didn't practise much in the last two years, you're pretty good. You sure can hold your own.”

Edwina shrugged: “Well, I learned it pretty early. And you?”

“Learned from Aoimoku and a professional street fighter. Aoimoku trained me in martial arts, so I'm pretty good at that too. But the freedom of street fighting just suits me more.”

“What kind of martial arts?”, Edwina asked curiously.

Alma shrugged. “A variety of stuff. I forgot the names of all the arts.”

They sat down on a bench. “But enough of that! Tell me about yourself! How old are you? What's your full name? What way do you swing?”

Edwina frowned. They had just met! This was way too intrusive!

“You go first!”, she demanded.

Alma beamed, obviously all too happy to talk about herself.

“Okay, so my full name is Alma Alexandra Donovan, I just turned 19, I like knives, dancing and getting into bar fights, I hate guys who don't leave me or my girls alone, I'm a lesbian – what's the matter?”, she asked worriedly, when the small brunette's frown deepened.

“You're not going to flirt at me, are you?”, she asked worriedly.

Vigorously, Alma shook her head. “Of course not! You're pretty cute, but Luise told me why I shouldn't do that. Besides, I already have three girlfriends.”

Edwina stared at her. “Three girlfriends?!”, she repeated incredulously.

Alma grinned and nodded. “Damn right! I'm in a polyamorous relationship! They're the best girls in the world for even putting up with a maniac like me! But now it's your turn! Fess up!”

“… Fine. I'm Edwina Aloise Hyde – but don't call me Aloise or you can say goodbye to your knee-caps – I'm twenty, dunno which way I swing, I like this place (so far), I hate people in general, was a street rat for half of my life and spent two years in prison for manslaughter and some other stuff.”

“Only two years?”, Alma queried.

Edwina nodded. “Mild circumstances. I wasn't quite eighteen yet, the manslaughter was in self-defence, I turned myself in and confessed everything. Then I tried my best to behave in prison.”

The redhead nodded appreciatively. “Smart of you. All that stuff usually lessens the sentence.”

“I know”, the brunette replied, “I read about it at some point. They would have caught me anyway. I saw surveillance cameras all over the place where I killed that fucktard.”

“Bummer”, Alma muttered, “Why did you kill him anyway?”

“Tried to rape me.”

“Huh. Happened to me too. I just castrate those fuckers.”

Edwina looked at the taller girl. “Have you ever actually been raped?”

“Nah. Close, but I always was able to hold my own. Stuff like this is why Luise forced me to train. And you?”

“Countless times.”

“Oh shit.”

“Yeah.”

Alma sighed: “Well, if my mum was still alive, she'd probably sympathise with you.”

That made the brunette curious. “Why?”

The other ruffled her own flaming hair. “You probably know that Luise is only my half-sister. We have different mothers. Mine was a prostitute. So she'd probably understand you.”

A sharp, red-hot pain went through Edwina's chest, as if she was being struck by lightening.

“Did she love you?”, she asked quietly.

Alma blinked in surprise. “Of course she did! I still remember her sweet smiles, her lullabies, her warm, soft arms, her gentle voice, how she always smelt like coffee and dark chocolate and how she called me her little fairy. But when dad died, my older half-brother took all the money he left to mum and me and ran off, Devil knows where. That broke mum's heart and she died too. I was only seven at that time, so Luise took me in.”

Now Edwina was hurting even more.

She'd been abandoned right after birth. Her mother hadn't wanted her. And Edwina knew for certain that she had almost been aborted twice.

And this other mother, a prostitute no less, had cared so much for her children, that the betrayal of one had caused her to die of heartbreak?

“Hey! What's the matter? Why are you crying?”, Alma asked bewildered.

I … I'm crying?

“I'm not crying, you're crying!”, Edwina choked, trying to fight back the other tears that wanted out.

Alma muttered a curse, before wrapping her hands around the brunette.

Edwina hated this entire situation.

She hated body contact, hated that a girl one year her junior was seeing her cry, hated that her memories about her childhood had been brought up like this …

But everything hurt, it felt like she was falling apart, and she now she was left alone, she would-

Another two pairs of arms joined Alma's.

When Edwina looked up, she recognised Luise and Henry looking at her with great worry.

“Edwina, what's the matter?”, latter asked gently.

“What happened?”, Luise demanded to know, looking at Alma.

“I don't know”, Alma replied helplessly and stepped back, “I just talked about my mum and she started crying!”

“You idiot!”, Henry cried in outrage, “How could you assume that it wouldn't hurt her to hear that you don't have mother issues?!”

“I'm not an idiot!”, she snapped back. “Besides, she asked me if my mother loved me or not! Was I supposed to lie?!”

“Enough!”, Luise said sharply. “Henry, don't call my sister an idiot. She's not. But Alma, he does have a point. You shouldn't have brought your mother up. Now away with you two. I will not have my sister and my friend start a catfight right here and now. This situation needs a professional.”

Edwina felt Henry's large hand stroke her hair once more, before he let go reluctantly.

They both left and the brunette allowed the Lady's arms to encircle her fully.

It hurt Luise to hear the girl's anguished wailing and to feel her quaking in her arms.

Poor child … she deserved so much better.

“That's right”, she whispered, “You can cry. Let it all out. Shhhh …”

Edwina cried harder and buried her face in Luise's shoulder.

This went for about half an hour, before the brunette's sobbing finally quieted down and her trembling ceased.

“Feeling a bit better?”, the blonde asked kindly.

The young woman sniffed and nodded.

“Come on, sweetie”, Luise cooed and dried Edwina's face with her handkerchief. “Here, wipe your nose. You're a mess.”

“Thank you”, the brunette croaked and wiped her nose.

“Anytime, dear”, she replied gently and pat her shoulder.

They were of the same height. Luise enjoyed having someone in her house she didn't have to look up to.

“I still don't get why you're so nice to me”, Edwina mumbled.

Luise smiled. “Because you need someone to be kind to you. And because, despite all of your hardships, you somehow managed to keep your good heart.”

“It has never brought me good before”, the girl muttered bitterly.

“Well, now it does”, the blonde chuckled. “When I first met you – when you tried and failed to rob me-”

“Don't remind me!”, Edwina groaned, “That was, like, super embarrassing!”

“-I looked into your mind. I saw so much anger, grief and pain. But it took me only a second to dig deeper and there I saw the selflessness and kindness you buried under your protective, tough shell.”

“You think I'm a good person?”

The girl's voice was hoarse.

Luise nodded.

“No one has ever told me that before …”

“Well, then it's about time that someone did, isn't it?”, the blonde asked gently.

“What were your parents like?”, the brunette wanted to know?

Luise frowned. “Don't make me hurt you more than you already are.”

“… So they loved you.”

“Yes, but rarely showed it. They were mostly really strict and pushy.”

That wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the entire truth either. Her parents had shown their love through small, simple gestures, but outright tenderness had been nigh taboo (at least in front of others).

“I got the supernatural thing from my father. He was even stricter than my mother.”

“On a scale from one to ten?”

She snorted: “Ten. It was like growing up in an army barrack!”

The brunette looked at her with huge eyes. “You're exaggerating.”

“No, I'm not!”, Luise laughed. “If I didn't get up at point 5am, he would strut into my room with a bucket of ice-cold water. He'd bark at me to get up, then give me one more opportunity to do so, before I got soaked! Five more minutes? Not an option in my family!”

“Seriously?!”

“Yep. Bad grades were no option either.”

“So you had to excel in everything?”

“Yes. Problem is I suck at higher mathematics and art. My father didn't care about art, but my mother was so disappointed.”

Edwina frowned. “One can't be good at everything, that's stupid.”

“I know”, Luise agreed, “Completely stupid. But with a high position come high expectations. I wasn't raised like a fairy tale princess, wearing pretty dresses and jewellery, dancing and playing with golden balls all day. That's not how being an aristocrat works. Being famous is like walking on glass. You can afford only so many mistakes, before your reputation is ruined for good. And without a reputation to speak of, you're practically powerless.”

Edwina considered.

The older woman's explanation sounded perfectly logical.

It had never occurred to her, that there could be more to it. All she had seen were those rich people drive around in expensive cars, wear priceless designer clothes and go to fancy celebrations with dolled up, fake-looking models at their arms.

“Some people are like that, it's true”, the blonde confirmed distastefully. “I hate them. They're spoiled brats who think they can do whatever they want. But if they suddenly became poor, they would be completely unable to take care of themselves.”

Edwina scoffed.

The countess continued: “You became homeless at the age of ten, went through the worst things and you're still here. Most of my rich acquaintances wouldn't last a week in the streets of London.”

“True”, the brunette muttered, “But you know … sometimes, I used to meet people who weren't the scum of earth, before they became homeless. There was a group of elderly professors skulking around Covent Garden. Smart people from rich families and now they have no home and must beg for each penny to survive. And other people who worked hard and still have nothing.”

She teared up. “It's not fair!”

“I know”, the older woman said gently. “I don't think it's fair either.”

“But you're rich!”, Edwina cried out in frustration, “You live in the poshest area in London in a luxurious villa, you employ over several dozen servants.”

The therapist nodded patiently. “Yes, that's true. But trust me, I know the meaning of the word 'suffering'. I learned it the hard way. When I was ten, I was kidnapped and used as a labrat in an evil scientific facility. They wanted to research the hell out of my abilities. That was awful.”

Holy shit!

“Then it happened again, when I was seventeen.”

“Whaaat-”

How could her parents let that happen?!

Luise, obviously knowing what she was thinking, raised her hands. “It wasn't their fault. First time I was kidnapped, while playing in the garden with our dog. Second time on a Ladies' restroom in a shopping mall. Both times, where it was possible for them to keep an eye on me. My father got hysterically overprotective after the first kidnapping, but of course he couldn't follow me into the restroom. And my mother was dead at that point.”

Oh … yeah, that makes sense.

“Then I got another hard lesson on life, when I was eighteen. That one was my fault though.”

“Really?”

“Yup.”

That got Edwina curious. “What happened?”

The old woman laughed: “Well, I was extremely explosive after the second kidnapping and on top of that I was going through my bratty phase. My father tried to be easy on me, but at some point, he just got fed up with my attitude. So he decided I should get a big piece of humble pie and learn a lesson about life and the world at the same time.”

“After being kidnapped twice?!”

“Yeah. To his defence though, I was a sheltered child at that time and knew nothing about the life of poor people. He got fed up with my bitchiness towards everyone and dared me to last a month on the street, with no access to my bank account or credit card.”

Edwina snorted. “And you agreed to that?!”

“Being a hot-headed, inexperienced 18-year-old, yes. So he took my phone and credit cards and threw me out. That was legal, because I was an adult and he technically did no longer have to provide for me. Of course I quickly found out that, even with the help of my training and abilities, life on the street was super difficult. It was pretty mind-blowing to me, that I suddenly wasn't a privileged blue-blood anymore. Just another street rat with nowhere to go. No better than all the others.”

“Did you last a month?”, the brunette asked curiously.

Luise snorted. “Kinda. I came crawling back to dad after a week, but he refused to take me back, until he could be sure, that I had learned my lesson. It baffled me how hard street life really is. I wouldn't have made it through without help, but all these people had done it for months, years or even decades! They were the ones who helped me and I saw that they were no different from you or me or the others.”

The ex-convict grinned lopsidedly.

She knew nothing but misery, but it still wasn't hard to imagine how stunning it must have been for a spoiled, rich teenager to no longer be spoiled and rich.

Still though …

“And your father did nothing all the while?”

“Oh, he watched over me from afar. He thought I didn't notice, but I totally did (he was never good at being sneaky). If I had got into real danger, he would have interfered.”

The countess said that with such certainty, that Edwina couldn't decide, if she was relieved, envious or sad. That woman's parents might have been really crass, but they had loved her in their own crazy way …

“Let's no longer talk about that”, Luise cut her off gently. “Let's see if the other two are still arguing out there. Knowing them, they totally are.”

Edwina needed a moment to understand whom the blonde meant, but then she suppressed a giggle.

“They don't like each other that much, do they?”

“Oh, they get along just fine”, the other laughed, “They're just the kind of friends, who bicker at every opportunity.”

The young woman grinned. Oh yes, she knew that kind of people.

Just like Luise had predicted, Henry and Alma were still bickering like five-year-olds.

She rolled her eyes, before speaking to them: “Good grief, still at it? How old are you two again?”

They shut up immediately and turned to the two women.

Alma began: “Henry said that I never think before I speak, even though he himself-”

“Well, you said, that-”, Henry interrupted her, but then Luise interrupted him in return.

“Shush! I do not wish to hear any of your nonsense this early. We will talk about this later.”

She shook her head. “Really, you two are lucky I love you so much!”

“I know”, Alma chuckled, “We certainly are, Lulu.”

“What did I say about calling me Lulu?! For god's sake, Alma, I'm fifty years old!”

“Oh sorry, I forgot … Lulu!”

Luise threw her a mock-glare and Alma stuck out her tongue in return.

Henry turned to Edwina. “Are you feeling better?”, he asked gently.

The brunette nodded and smiled. “Yeah, much better.”

Then she turned back to Luise and Alma: “One thing I wanna know, though. You said you are sisters.”

“That's true”, they answered in unison.

“So, if Luise has paranormal abilities … do you too?”

Alma nodded. “Yup. Precognition. That means I can predict the future.”

“Sounds pretty cool”, Edwina stated.

The redhead shrugged. “It can be. Not always, though. A lot of my visions are unpleasant. Then there is another nasty catch.”

The brunette tilted her head. “A catch to an ability you were born with?”

“Yep. Almost no one believes my prophecies. They strike me at random and to other people it sounds like I'm rambling, when in fact I mean to warn them, give them advice or cheer them up. Just yesterday I told my oldest girlfriend to take an umbrella with her, because it was going to rain. But the sun was shining, so she didn't believe me. Needless to say, she was completely soaked, when she came home.”

She huffed in frustration. “Maybe I should become a weather forecaster. Perhaps more people would believe me then.”

Luise didn't need Alma's prophetic abilities to predict what would happen next.

“So … I don't know, if I will be an exception in that regard …”

“You won't”, Alma deadpanned.

The small brunette scratched her head awkwardly.

“Okay, still though. I know it sounds corny as fuck and you probably get that question from a lot of people, but …”

Luise threw her sister a warning glare, before she could interrupt again.

“… Will I ever find true love?”, Edwina asked shyly.

Alma laughed: “Yes, but I don't need to be a prophet to know that.”

“She's right”, Henry agreed, “You're a loveable person, Edwina. You will find someone who will treat you with the respect, affection and care you deserve.”

“I can only agree with the other two”, Luise confirmed with a smile.

The twenty-year-old blushed and sputtered like no tomorrow.

“Seriously though”, the redhead continued, capturing everyone's attention. “Your soulmates are just waiting for you to find them, even though they don't know it yet.”

“Several?”, the brunette echoed confusedly. “But who-”

“I can't tell you that”, Alma replied, “My visions aren't that clear. And like I said, they strike me at random.”

Should I tell her, who it is?

“No”, Luise responded telepathically.

Meanwhile Edwina was frowning at Alma. “I don't believe it”, she said simply. “No offence.”

“None taken”, the teenager relented graciously, “I knew you wouldn't.”

Sure enough, Edwina's thoughts were speaking for her statement: Several people loving someone like me?! Impossible! That's fucking ridiculous!

Luise shook her head. That young girl would need an ego boost once they were done here.

Finally, it was Henry who relieved the awkward atmosphere.

“Let's not stand here in the hallway like a bunch of idiots. I'm sure everyone has better things to do.”

“Like what?”, teased Luise, “Your husband and mine are at work, you're on your holidays, my first client won't be due until 2pm, Alma's date with her three graces won't be until noon – until then you should better freshen up, young lady! – and Edwina has no duties to attend to at all.”

“Uhm …”

“Let's train once more!”, Alma suggested eagerly, “Let's fight and kick the awkward out of each other!”

Edwina grinned. “That works for me!”

“Sure”, Luise consented, “Give me just a minute, I still have to wear that dress later.”

She dashed off and returned less than five minutes later in a judoka suit.

“Alright!”, she said with a shit-eating grin and cracked her knuckles, “I'm ready to kick your collective behinds!”

The other women grinned back. “Challenge accepted!”

Henry couldn't help but being a little intimidated by how belligerent the three were.

“Not mine, please”, he begged, “I'll be more than content with being a spectator.”

He might have been comparatively fit for his age, but he was a poor fighter. Not to mention how vicious Luise and Alma could get during their training, especially when they used weapons …

“What's the matter, Harry”, the latter taunted, “Are you chicken?”

That hurt his pride – he wasn't chicken! – but he kept his cool.

“ No, but I'm a doctor and a scientist, not a fighter. And I'd rather still be able to move later, thank you”, he retorted.

“At least do the warm-ups with me”, Luise compromised.

Henry considered. He knew he wouldn't get away with just sitting there, but some warm-ups wouldn't hurt. Hopefully.

“Fine.”

He quickly regretted it. Not only, because he had much more trouble than Luise in the exercises. He got distracted very quickly, when he looked up once to see what the two younger women were doing.

Edwina and Alma were practising street fighting and martial art techniques.

And god, were they good at it!

Both seemed to be in perfect control in their bodies. It was as if they were gliding through the air. Like two hummingbirds. Just with the intention of overpowering the other.

It didn't seem like fighting at all.

It seemed more like a dance.

“Henry, are you still with us?”

Luise's voice startled him back into reality.

“Huh? O-oh, yes, yes, I'm present! What's the matter?”

Luise was looking at him strangely. “You just sat there like an idiot and stared at the two girls over there. Their training really entrances you, doesn't it?”, she added teasingly.

Caught red-handed, the doctor blushed bright scarlet. “I … I … it just looks so …”

“So expressive? So raw and powerful?”

He nodded awkwardly.

“Well, I can't blame you”, Luise laughed and clapped her hands. “Girls! I'm good and ready! And you? Are you ready to lose?”, she teased.

“Hah!”, Alma cried, “If anyone loses, it's you old woman!”

She mock-gasped and clutched her heart. “Look at this audacity!”, she cried, “Such language towards her own sister! Oh, it's so on, you two!”

Luise started and quickly proved, that she hadn't lost her touch just yet. She needed less than ten minutes to overpower the two younger women.

And still she stood up and noted: “Hach, I have to practise more again, I'm out of shape!”

“Out of shape?”, Edwina echoed incredulously, “You defeated us like it was nothing!”

“Well, it was my advantage, that you two were already exhausted. And I do have the power of experience on my side. Besides, I just warmed up.”

She helped them up and turned to leave. “That was fun. But now we should shower, since-”

“Aw, but I want to do sword training! I haven't worked off all my energy for the morning just yet!”, Alma whined.

Luise rolled her eyes and whipped her smartphone out of her pocket.

Why does she have her smartphone in the pocket of her sport suit?, Henry wondered.

Then she dialled a number, said something in Japanese and put the phone back.

In suspiciously short time, a small Asian woman in a black kimono appeared. Aoimoku, the Japanese handmaid.

“Your little sister wants to sword fight”, Luise told her.

Aoimoku responded with a coy, innocent smile that could only mean one thing: she was ready to kick arse.

“Also”, Luise continued, “I don't think you've met my new lodger yet? Aoimoku, this is Edwina Hyde. Edwina, this is Kurogawa Aoimoku, my handmaid and second youngest half-sister.”

“Konnichiwa, Hyde-san*”, the Japanese greeted politely and bowed.

Henry mentally facepalmed. Couldn't that woman at least put some effort into greeting English people in their own language?!

Of course, Edwina was confused. “Uhh … hi?”

The Japanese's ice-blue eyes widened. “Ah! Gomennne** – I'm sorry! I don't notice when I speak Japanese sometimes! Hello, Miss Hyde! Nice to meet you.”

“Likewise”, the brunette finally answered awkwardly.

“Don't worry, Aoimoku is very nice and friendly-”, Luise assured her.

Henry sighed: “Isn't that a trademark attribute of Japanese people?”

The handmaid giggled, obviously flattered.

The noblewoman glared at him sharply. “I wasn't finished, you twat!”

“Sorry, sorry!”

“-But you should know that she has the ability to make herself invisible. And she likes to play pranks. They're harmless, though.”

Aoimoku laughed awkwardly, but didn't try to justify herself.

Edwina snorted: “You mean the “this house is haunted by a ghost” variety of pranks?”

“Pretty much”, Luise, Alma and Henry answered in unison and chortled.

“Don't laugh at my expense, while I'm still here!”, Aoimoku huffed. “I'll make you pay for this!”

Then she took on a professional expression and handed the keys to her mistress.

Luise thanked her and unlocked the other training room.

Edwina's heart made a leap, when she caught a glimpse of the training room she had seen two days before.

“Can I watch?”, she blurted out.

The other three women turned to her, blinking.

“I won't touch anything, promise! I just want to see how you do it! Pleeeeaase!”

She made the cutest puppy eyes she could muster. Because, come on! It was sword fighting! Like hell she would miss that!

Luise rolled her eyes, but she smiled. “Fine. I guess I can't stop you.”

“YAY!”, the brunette cheered and beamed at the others.

The four exchanged fond smiles, before entering the big training room.

It was just like Edwina remembered. Too bad she had to stay in the background, while the other three women unlocked the cabinets and each chose a sword.

The brunette wondered, if they always regarded the weapons with such fascination, before using them for combat.

But then they charged at each other and her mind was captivated.

She stood up to see more, but Henry put his hand on her shoulder.

“Stay back here”, he said, “Once they got the flow, they're absolutely vicious in their sword fighting. It's so brutal, you'd never guess that they're just training.”

Five minutes later it was apparent that he hadn't been joking.

Luise, Alma and Aoimoku were moving like flashes, the clashing of their swords the only noise in the room. Aside from their breathing and occasional battle cry of course. They didn't just use their swords. They fought with their entire bodies.

Edwina could hardly follow their faces, but they looked so fierce and concentrated, as if they were actually fighting a deadly foe. Every move seemed to be perfectly masterful, enough to make all those martial artists pale in comparison.

“Wow”, she marvelled.

Henry nodded. “Compelling, isn't it? Aoimoku stars in martial arts movies sometimes, but most of the time, she's Luise's handmaid.”

“Who has a handmaid in the 21st century?”, Edwina questioned.

“Well, what can I say?”, Luise piped up through the fight, “I'm extra like that.”

Then the small blonde backed away. “That's enough for today, girls! I suggest that we all freshen up. Thank you for your time, Aoi, you can go back downstairs. Alma, you can use my bathroom and go first. Hurry though, I want to take my shower before lunch. And where do you think you're going with that sword?”, Luise added sharply, when the redhead attempted to sneak away with her weapon. “I thought I said something about any of my weapons leaving this room.”

“Oh come oooooon, Luise!”, Alma whined.

But the German shook her head. “No.”

Aoimoku did the same.

Alma looked at Henry, but he just snorted: “Don't expect any support from me! I would never trust you with any weapon out of Luise's sight!”

“Spoilsport”, she grumbled, but put the sword back in the cabinet, where it belonged.

Edwina laughed.

Good to know that the Countess wasn't only apprehensive towards her, when it came to handling her weapons. That was fair.

---

*Konnichiwa, Hyde-san - Japanese: Hello, Ms. Hyde

**Gomennne - Japanese: I’m sorry