vixen-angel - Tumblr blog

[vixen-angel]

uhh???

[vixen-angel]

i feel like tons of people will always love the idea of me but will never *actually* love me, no matter all the lies you spew. you cant even tell me WHY you like me? its obvious. you're just lonely.

[vixen-angel]

having BPD be like don't split don't split don't split don't split don't split don't split don't split don't split don't spl- *splits*

[vixen-angel]

cute bpd things!!

paranoia

*small inconvenience* BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP

yeah im fine lol look at this meme :D

paranoia

mood depending on them

every text hurts or feels way too good

intrusive thought yeouch okay ouch thats another one yeOOUCH

the 50000+ articles on how youre abusive

paranoia

fp is bad for me but its ok i love them<3

"if i hurt someone its gonna be myself"

becoming completely obsessed with someone the moment they give you the slightest attention

never being able to cut anyone off ever. immediately go running back

cry because theyre talking to someone that IS NOT ME

oh my fp isnt here. okay. oh im dissociating okay i dont have any purpose to continue living without them okay my life literally revolves around them i want to die where are they are they safe i dont know what to do with myself

"just leave. everyone does anyways"

5 minutes later theyre the worst person ever

*looking for an identity* hmmm, where could it be?

dependent on fp like theyre a parental figure you never had

paranoia

[vixen-angel]

I saw your interest in psychology and it brings up something that I, and many others, have noticed that pisses me off

So many mentally ill people with scary illnesses/symptoms like psychology and I even study it in college now. And yet psychiatrists and therapists are often neurotypical and they look down on people like us!

I'm so terrified to go to therapy cause of their biases. Even if they claim to be okay with things like personality disorders or 'dark' thoughts, they often aren't. I have much more important shit to do than be hospitalized for being a danger when I'm actively trying to learn how to prevent it from happening!

completely agree! ive noticed many people get placed in wards for "being a danger" when all theyve done is admit to having certain symptoms and asking for help. why hospitalize someone whose actively trying to get better?? putting someone in such a situation only makes things worse. i dont believe someone should be hospitalized for something like lets say simple homicidal thoughts. im sure EVERYONE has thought about hurting another person at least one time, yet most never do it. most people who do have serious mental illnesses do not commit to the thoughts they have, though many seek help. and im sure psychiatrists and therapists know just how damaging it is to be put in a psych ward when youre already dealing with alot, and all youre trying to do is get better. I just dont believe the "professionals" really care, they know theyre going to get a check wether you get actual help or not. there needs to be more neurodivergent people working in those positions, or atleast people who ACTUALLY care and want others to get better.

thank you for the ask, i really appreciate it! and its also a very good topic to bring up on here I've been meaning to talk about this stuff so ill take this as a little push.

[vixen-angel]

i don't know why i even try to make people care about me. i know if they dont care, i should let them go. but if i let everyone who didnt care about me go, id have no one left.

[vixen-angel]

I’m okay.

it’s getting bad again

[vixen-angel]

purposely putting yourself in danger, or being visibly sad so maybe someone might ask if youre doin alright.. but then nobody bats an eye.

[vixen-angel]

just tell me you don’t want me around fuck

[vixen-angel]

In the hearts of the people I love the most, I will always be second place to someone else.

[vixen-angel]

worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean

[vixen-angel]

having bpd is actual hell on earth cause no one tries to fucking understand you and they write you off as being difficult and too much and they leave and we’re left with this fucking personality disorder that consumes my entire fucking existence and they act like its THEIR inconvenience that IM ill.

[vixen-angel]

[vixen-angel]

i wish taylor swift died and i never had to hear about her again

[vixen-angel]

i come on tumblr. i reblog eighty posts. i leave until tomorrow.

[vixen-angel]

hi welcome to my blog =] im not new to tumblr, just wanted a side account to rant on and be angry on.

speaking of, if you yourself are quite angry and wanna vent, i have asks on and you can go anon. talk to me, im always here. =]

heres a bit about me:

i won't be saying my real name for privacy reasons, you can call me rory though =] .

i use she/her pronouns, i am a cis lesbian.

i am german, though i dont know way too much of the language, i was taught english for majority of my life.

i have bpd and severe anger issues causing most of my thoughts. i have never and will never act on any of my thoughts, i am not a danger to myself or others.

i have no dni.

my only boundaries are that you dont flirt with me.

i like true crime, metal, psychology, music in general, cooking, writing, art, and slasher films.

i have a discord, dm me for that if you would like to be friends.

i am very open about my support for everyone who has any mental disorders, i have a whole separate blog for mental health where i talk mostly about bpd(mainly cluster b's like myself), npd, and autism

thats all i can really think about now =] thanks for visiting my blog <3