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Mermay post!!

Superbat mermay,,,

Designed bruce after the species of chimera (or ratfish) called the ghost shark, a relative of sharks like skates and rays.

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Repeating patterns

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Dick Grayson, age 25: *gets shot at daily, does back flips off of buildings for fun*

Also Dick Grayson, age 25: "Bruce can you come with me to the dentist 🥺? I have to get a filling... 🥺🥺."

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Very quick decompression sketch because the last few weeks of uni semester are kicking my ass. It’s mermay so have some mer!Clark and baby kon from a superwonderbat mer!Clark/pirate!Bruce/princess of themiscyra!Diana AU that lives only in my head

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I don't mean to sound jealous or ungrateful but I'm kind of getting tired of looking out my window and seeing Superman give Batman the best back shots he's ever probably had in his life I just wish at least once a week they would choose a different building to do that on

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do u think Bruce ever thinks about chatterbox dick and thinks about when he was nonverbal and think I’m glad he expresses himself

He’s come a long way :)

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it’s mermay so have this old sketches of ra’s and damian as mermaids. damian is so tiny he has to hold on to ra’s’ spines so the currents don’t sweep him away. (he is also immune to the spines’ toxins)

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Jason makes it his mission every holiday season to get Bruce drunk. He has never seen him drunk. None of the Batclan have. They make bets on what kind of drunk he’d be should they ever be lucky enough to bear witness to it.

Clark catches wind of the bets and struggles between making a bet himself that he’d be sure to win or revealing that the only difference between drunk Bruce and sober Bruce is that drunk Bruce likes to talk with a French accent.

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Bruce visiting Clark after getting accidentally hammered: “Zis room is very dark, mon cheri.”

Clark: “Bruce. That’s the broom closet.”

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The Batcave has a “Do Not Talk To Me” couch. It’s sacred. It’s unspoken. It’s real.

okay so. picture this:

the batcave has one couch. it's in the corner. it’s hideous. it’s like beige or green or something equally offensive to every one of their aesthetics. no one likes the couch.

and that is exactly why it became sacred.

because one night jason just. drops onto it. full gear. bleeding. absolutely done with life. says nothing. doesn’t even take off the helmet. sits there in silence for 3 hours and then leaves.

next week tim uses it. sits there post-mission. face in hands. someone tries to ask if he’s okay and jason throws a batarang at them.

and thus it began.

Rules of the Do Not Talk To Me Couch:

You sit there? No one speaks to you.

You cry? No you didn’t.

You eat cold noodles off your chest at 4 a.m.? That’s sacred time.

If someone tries to comfort you? They are excommunicated for 12 hours.

Dick (sitting on the couch):

Damian: Grayson, are you—

Jason (from across the cave): HE’S ON THE COUCH.

Jason: I don’t make the rules.

Steph: You LITERALLY made the rules.

Jason: And I am the defender of the rules. There’s a difference.

one time damian storms in. covered in blood. absolutely furious. 10/10 rage goblin energy. throws his sword. marches to the couch. sits. arms crossed. steaming.

tim takes one look at him and goes: “i’m making tea.”

jason: “that’s acceptable. tea is allowed. talking is not.”

bonus:

once bruce sits on it.

and the ENTIRE CAVE goes silent.

tim literally freezes mid-typing. cass stops mid-flip. jason just mutters “oh shit.”

they all leave. immediately.

the couch is not ready for bruce.

extra bonus:

alfred vacuums around the couch. never says a word. leaves snacks in a silent offering. once placed a weighted blanket gently on jason’s shoulder. that’s different. he’s allowed.

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"All vigilantes date aliens" factoid actually just statistical error. Average vigilante dates no aliens. The Batclan, who live in a cave and only date aliens was an outlier and should not have been included.

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I've never drawn these two but a little mermay Superbat for your soul??

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As promised, I’ve painted one of the sketches from this post. Based on my fave superbat Mer!AU, Salinity by @batman-katflap

I love how unimpressed Bruce/Blue gets with Clark sometimes, so I had to paint this one

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i’m sorry but this is fucking hilarious

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Clark doesn’t text like that on a daily basis he’s just messing with Bruce (*・ω・)ﾉ

Also the sketch version under bc they looked too cute for me to discard

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When the Batkids all realise Bruce is so tooth rottingly supportive of his family, they start a competition to test just how far this support goes.

Jason makes tshirts with crude sayings and even cruder drawings on them.

Bruce wears them without question.

Tim makes an app that just tells you what your nut of the day is.

Bruce uses it everyday.

The rest of the clan try it themselves and only stop when Dick hires out a theatre and preforms a one man play slash interpretive dance for all the family.

Bruce is the only one to not pull out their phone or look bored even when the performance goes into its forth hour.

After that they realise there is no ceiling. They could do anything and Bruce will be behind them 100 percent.

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again, Batlantern isn’t my wheelhouse to write (god sometimes I wish it was) but I feel like the more explicit fics have kind of ignored the massive smut potential of Bruce canonically knowing how to break a Lantern’s concentration and using that in bed while Hal tries to hold out. here you’ve got Earth’s most powerful Lantern desperately trying to keep a construct up just to prove he can while one (1) human man more stubborn than the gods themselves is trying to break that concentration.