depresso-espresso-5150

[depresso-espresso-5150]

I keep all of the pain inside because I'd rather let it destroy me than everyone else.

idk not me

[depresso-espresso-5150]

I know I'm unlovable. Sometimes its just nice to pretend I'm not.

[depresso-espresso-5150]

Sometimes it scares me how much I think about going out for a walk, and never coming home. How willing I am to leave everything I have, and everyone I know.

s.m

[depresso-espresso-5150]

My thoughts have destroyed me more than blades ever could.

I dunno

[depresso-espresso-5150]

I don't reblog but this is important and I support it so here you go. Even when engaging in unsafe behaviors (self harm and other things) please be as safe as possible.

more harm reduction resources for people who self-harm

more resources on how to be as safe as possible when self-harming

more info on what tools are safest, how to prevent infection, what products to use on wounds afterwards

less shaming people who self-harm, less telling people not to self-harm at all when they ask how they can be safer, less stigma around self-harm

more harm reduction for people who self-harm

[depresso-espresso-5150]

"I feel trapped with no escape, but like a heart locked away inside of a ribcage, maybe this is where I belong."

by me

[depresso-espresso-5150]

ive never related to a song more than Melanie Martinez song dollhouse "when you turn your back she pulls out a flask and forgets his infidelity" is literally my mom. "Smile for the picture pose with your brother won't you be a too sister" my grandma hiding problems with pretty pretty pictures. An not in the correct context but "I see things that nobody else sees" I've been hallucinating scary shit since I was 9. Anyway just needed to get that out. I know no ones gonna see this but its a vent account so I don't care lmao.

[depresso-espresso-5150]

Suicide is illegal because it is a crime to destroy government property.

I dunno (But some smart bitch, that’s for sure.)

[depresso-espresso-5150]

One who is trapped within himself will do anything to be free.

I dunno

[depresso-espresso-5150]

I destroy myself so there's nothing left for other people to break.

idk not me

[depresso-espresso-5150]

"Just tired," she muttered. But you could tell that it was not just a lack of sleep, but a lack of hope and happiness that made her act the way she did.

(h.m)

[depresso-espresso-5150]

It’s loud inside my head...

I don’t know how to explain what this means. When I tried to explain to my mom, she only gets more confused. And if I’m being honest, I don’t evem know what it is.

It’s not like voices, not like racing thought. I have both of those too, and this is different. The “loud” isn’t thoughts, it isn’t like yelling or words, not buzzing or a high pitch screetching.It’s just loud. 

I hate that I can tell you what it’s not, but I can’t tell you what it is. I hate when it’s loud inside my head but I haven’t found a way to make it stop. 

[depresso-espresso-5150]

Everything’s just been too much lately—I’m not sure how much more of this I can take.

idk not me

[depresso-espresso-5150]

I know what it's like to wanna die, how it hurts to smile, how you try to fit in but you can't, how you hurt yourself on the outside, to try to kill the thing on the inside.

I dunno

[depresso-espresso-5150]

Too sad to cry, so she smiled.

Not me

[depresso-espresso-5150]

I'm here for you," "You're not alone," "You will always have me" Fucking bullshit. When it's 2:30 A.M, and ,my self-loathing claws it's way up my throat, and rips itself from my mouth in a silent scream, I am alone. When the blade parts my skin, when the cuts get deeper, there is no one, I am alone. When the only real thing is the blood running down my arms, I am alone. You say you are here, but you're not.

(a.m)

[depresso-espresso-5150]

There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel.

Ranata Suzuki