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incorrect-ikevamp-quotes · 3 years

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What’s your opinion for Leo’s reaction to finding out the mc was immortal as well- not necessarily a vampire, maybe they’re some other type of supernatural. I’m really curious because Leo seems like he’s mainly in love with the mc bec they are human.

Hi lovely!!! Always wonderful to see you, hope you’re well! 💛💛💛💛💛

Tbh I think my opinion remains the same about something like this? I'm going to link to an ask I wrote up a while ago, only because it's v pertinent to the subject matter and good background for what I’m going to expand on here.

That being said, I'm happy to kind of tl;dr/expand on what I talked about there. Basically I had the feeling that Leonardo choosing MC as a lover was more circumstantial--regarding the state of his life in the moment, regarding his general feelings about vampires and vampire society, and regarding his unresolved trauma as a young kid.

I guess my answer to that question--and forgive me if it seems like a cop out--is that it really depends, I feel? I think his attraction has a lot more to do with the kind of person somebody is, their sensibility, more than it has to do with mortal vs immortal. If it was an immortal MC that showed ridiculous fortitude and self-control, measured patience and maturity, I really don’t see him not noticing that? I think he would be wary at first (assuming it’s all a front) but with time would likely feel a great deal of love if they were interested in a life together. If they were able to see and understand what he needs and answered those needs, I guess I just really doubt his ability to say no. It’s all he’s really looking for, and the fact that he hasn’t found it after so long really speaks to his frightened evasiveness and the rare nature of that kind of unshakeable strength.

I also think a lot of his hinging away from purebloods (true immortals, in other words) is that he 100% does not want his familia having any involvement in his meaningful relationships. Which might be why he shows more acceptance towards turned vampires, or potentially different supernatural beings.

But I also don’t like giving a vague answer without some kind of explanation as to how I got, to that conclusion, so a boatload of analysis follows below the content warning.

Spoilers for Leonardo’s route and a few mentions of JPN ver content:

I think he has less of an obsession with the idea of mortality, and more like a constant association of goodness and freedom and maturity with humanity. And while it's understandable, there are signs that--when he has the proper time and space to heal--his views seem to soften from those extremes. I mean his decision to live with Comte is pretty much his first step in that direction; it was him acknowledging for the first time that vampires aren't inherently loathsome or incapable of normal living. (On a revealing note, I think it says a lot that he agrees with MC that she is living in a “wolves’ den” but also feels the need to clarify the men are basically the domesticated equivalent. They don’t pose the same threat other vampires typically do to humans because of their lifestyle and sire.) Additionally, his tsun-like behavior towards Comte also seems to solidify this concept for me: Leonardo’s trying to come to terms with something he's sworn to reject since he was young, but also can't entirely deny that Comte is as chill and mature as purebloods come lmao

[There was also an event in the JPN ver–which seems to be approaching the ENG version rapidly, though only the first part is here right now–in which Leonardo fully offers to turn her. MC is essentially on her death bed, and Leonardo doesn’t want to lose her after so little time together; it’s MC that rejects the future as a vampire out of sheer principle. Even more noteworthy is that, when a reincarnation of MC is reunited with Leonardo in modern times, he is revealed to be exceptionally shaken by that loss. There are suggestions he can’t take losing her again, which could mean succumbing to the desire to bite her.]

Two things I feel are necessary to hit home:

The first being that, at least within the storyline so far, the most mature and human-like vampires we’ve seen are Leonardo and Comte. They seek to emulate the maturity they see reflected in the human beings they’ve known all their lives. Given how vampire society and their hierarchies work, I get the feeling humans are nothing more than amusing tools to them--a way to survive and creatures to exercise control over. There’s an objectification and delusion that comes with what I’ve seen, and I think it’s important in this discussion? If the vast majority of vampires behave this way (because I’m ngl, Leonardo and Comte don’t seem very keen on remaining in touch with other vampires all that much) then it only makes sense they prefer the company of humans who can at least share this sensibility of “been there, done that--stop hurting people bc you’re bored/repressed, grow up.”

One event story where this was exceedingly evident was actually Leonardo’s proposal story. If y’all remember, an old pal/acquaintance of Leonardo’s finds out he’s gunning for a human woman and basically goes “lmao not on my watch.” His name was Adam iirc, and he felt he had every liberty to try and pressure Leonardo into turning MC. Failing that, he insisted they should break up and not be together anymore. Now, on the one hand, it’s fair to say that he was looking out for Leonardo in a way–he didn’t want him to end up miserable and alone when she was gone. But at the same time I feel that Adam’s behavior is deeply revealing of vampire society as well lmao. He doesn’t really try to understand the situation, just immediately assumes it’s the only appropriate outcome. It does insinuate a lowkey cultural disdain for humanity: they are imperfect, they do not last or cannot have real value without preservation. If Adam was really Leonardo’s friend, wouldn’t he realize that Leonardo considers vampirism nothing more than a burden that he would wish on no one, much less his future wife? Additionally, wouldn’t he also keep in mind that Leonardo considers human beings beautiful just as they are? Since he fails these basic requirements to understand Leonardo, my impression is that he is influenced by the larger vampire culture to some extent. Furthermore, it underscores just how thoroughly Leonardo has been trained to keep his cards close to his chest for fear of ridicule/violent reprisal: no vampires know his true feelings on the matter because he would be vehemently rejected outright.

[One can also offer that maybe Adam wasn’t being malicious, maybe vampires find human women they fall in love with all the time and turn them (or any other permutation of companionship that occurs), so he doesn’t understand why Leonardo wouldn’t. But even then, to try to force them to break up if she doesn’t turn? A bit overkill imo but also revealing--Leonardo’s will is being ignored for the sake of upholding a kind of ill-founded superiority complex lmao]

While Leonardo does have a somewhat overbearing need to control the pacing of his relationship and who sacrifices what, I don’t think it’s wrong to be cautious--to want to think things through. I think it’s fair to be afraid that the person you’re with can’t handle what you’ve seen/known. But that also leads me to a core issue I have with MC: she doesn’t inspire much confidence that she can handle the life he’s lived, and that’s a problem of both incapacity and incompatibility. I have to wonder how he reacts when he’s with somebody at the same maturity level, or at the very least somebody with whom he can see her strength with time. When MC’s life was dying out he was desperate enough to accept biting her because he didn’t want to lose her–human or not. It’s MC that rejects this solution, which leads me to further believe that he just doesn’t care about the divide when it comes down to it; it has more to do with his difficulty with being vulnerable and fully trusting someone to care about him. (Assuming they also have the fortitude to stay hopeful and relatively strong over the course of a very long life.)

In line with that, the second thing I think it’s important to acknowledge is how deeply hurt Leonardo is as a result of his family treating him like a fool/black sheep. He outright says and heavily insinuates that his family would write her off as worthless, that they’d never accept her--that's his first thought:

Leonardo: “My familia would call you frail. I think you’re strong and beautiful. You do more with your time than we try to do with ours.”

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MC: “And those letters were from your familia?”

Leonardo: “Yeah. I don’t talk to them or see them anymore. We don’t agree...on a lot of things.”

[Brief intermission here. But lmao. Who does that sound like? If any of you guessed Isaac, that’s exactly what I’m alluding to. Isaac says in his own route smth along the lines of “Why bother trying to get through to people when no amount of talking does any good or gets you any closer to being understood?” Which also explains the way they get along to uncanny degrees: they find comfort in making things/researching because it means being able to avoid the distress that comes with being blatantly misunderstood by others. Their pain simply comes in different dimensions; for Leo it’s about loss and hiding who he is out of fear of rejection, for Isaac it’s about betrayal and people turning on him--ultimately abandonment for both. But I digress, back to the main argument.]

Leonardo: “Once they discovered my location, they began hounding me with letters again. They don’t want me to be with just anyone...They want more purebloods. I’m no more than one half of an equation for them.”

There is a clear implication that his desire to choose somebody that truly makes him happy means jack shit to them. They keep talking over him and trying to wear him down to force him into what they want. It’s no wonder--imo--that he has such a hard time just saying what he wants in his life, to feel like he has the freedom to wish and pursue anything freely. It’s no wonder he just expects MC to spit on everything that’s important to him. It appears as though only other human beings in general and Comte have ever come close to understanding him.

At some point MC realizes that his insistence on being compagni provvisori was originally just another act of sacrifice, and that he was fine with giving up his time and a little privacy if it meant she would be safe. The thing she doesn’t seem to realize in the course of this--and he struggles to say it until later on--is that it stopped being blind generosity. He really did start to fall in love with her, and that’s the whole reason things became even more messy; because he didn’t anticipate not being able to let go on top of the vulnerability. And it’s a big part of why he’s hesitating to speak. He feels he has no right to those feelings, and that he’s imposing on her--not that he’ll be welcome.

And when she did finally admit those feelings were welcome, it was compounded by the parroted views of his family and larger vampire society as a whole. Saying that she herself wasn’t enough, that she had to become a vampire to make him happy. Imo that sounds very potentially retraumatizing given his experiences (people trying to force him into marriages with other vampires who didn’t remotely understand or care about him because it was “the right way of things”). It’s no wonder he freaks out and does something incredibly stupid and insensitive–which is pretty insanely ooc for him.

Leonardo: “...It shocked them. Quieted them down a bit. Hard to get peace when your familia is immortal. Grazie, cara mia.”

Leonardo: “You’re strong, and you’re kind. So probably you won’t cry while I’m here to see it. But when I’m not looking, you’ll cry. If I had done that to you (bitten her, in other words), you’d still be crying when I wasn’t watching... Maybe it’s selfish of me, after what I did, but I just wanted to make you happy. You always look pretty, cara mia, but your smile takes my breath away...It’s not your destiny to love someone who will only make you cry.”

This man literally cannot handle anyone deeply sad or in despair. He’s always going to try to cheer people up and care about them, but general tragedy/emotional discord affects him very powerfully--and it’s likely a reflection of what I’ve mentioned before. He can’t bear to see people feeling helpless or miserable because he’s just been there too many times to be able to cope. He wants to help and heal (even if he’s suffering from prolonged compassion fatigue), but he knows that his powers are limited--even if he is a pureblood.

And the thing is? While it’s misguided to believe she would cry alone when it comes to the context of healthy romantic love (bc the idea would be that you lean on each other when something upsetting happens) he has zero reference point. He was not born as a result of authentic love (his parents never married, he was the result of a procreative arrangement), his family talks over every wish and belief he has and they still claim it’s done out of love/honest concern for him. One can only imagine the serpentine and obnoxious lengths to which his family has deceived or tried to force him into reconnecting with them. Every person that ever did know him/care about him in a real way is gone. Love, for him, has only been a series of losses that left his heart hollowed out; I don’t really blame him for expecting further disappointment and isolation and exhaustion.

He’s also not wrong in the sense that he partially saw MC do what he outlined, and it’s a big part about what he loves about her. When she was feeling alone and lost–powerless–all she did was shrug and move forward. That doesn’t make it hurt any less, but focusing on what you can do instead of what you can’t do is healthier. And they both have the tendency to hide when they’re in pain or feeling lost, all because they don’t want to trouble anyone. Remember that when he says this, it’s a reflection of himself too: because even if he was heartbroken beyond measure, all he would do is hide it every second; he would never expect anyone to see right through him or care.

I mean I tend think of that one post I saw that talked about how people often see themselves as a social burden when most of their life has just been a series of neglect and loss. They don’t really have a concept of “you’re not heavy because I want to stay with you. It’s my choice to care about you.” How do you feel worthwhile an existence when four hundred years later your family still won’t treat you with basic dignity. The men in the mansion also all look to him for guidance and soothing because of the kind of person he is–he’s either silent in the periphery or helping. He never betrays so much as an inkling of insecurity or distress.

I mean the whole reason Leonardo comes to the mansion is because he has absolutely no issue helping Comte in a pivotal time of need without seeking much of anything in return. Remember that Comte explains how Leonardo came to the mansion in response to Comte’s distress about the future. This makes sense considering Comte was rapidly trying to stop Vlad by beating him to the punch, and had only enough time to plan the basics. He had no certainty things would work out, much less that his boys would thrive. But Comte, unlike the boys, has become acutely aware of how much Leonardo is hiding his fatigue and despair in the course of being helped. As such, he wants to return the favor--and tries to be a good friend to him as much as he can (handles his insane familia, keeps things light and silly time between them, takes him seriously as a person, doesn’t pry beyond what’s fair.)

[I also think of that psychology concept of “the good enough mother.” It’s not always about being perfect every second of your life. It’s about paying attention and acting where it really counts. I feel like people who grow up under an enormous burden of neglect or parental/mentor abuse have a hard time coming to terms with the idea. This notion that just trying is enough for a lot of people, that showing them they’re not alone is enough to make difficult memories bearable. Because it’s the oppressive silence and apathy that tends to kills people, imo--not people who mean well. But Leonardo doesn’t really understand any kind of reciprocal or non-self-emptying model because the concept is beyond him. He has no experience with it beyond Comte and a select few humans he’s befriended.]

Let’s continue on this point of MC crying where he can’t see her, shall we? The reason this scares him so much is not because he doesn’t care, or doesn’t want to make the effort. It’s precisely that he cares to the point of madness. It’s that he is legitimately convinced nothing he has to say, nothing that he can do, no part of him is enough to ease what she will have to trade away to stay with him. The core issue is not one of disregard or objectification, I find it to be more about his belief that he just isn’t enough. He doesn’t trust that anyone can love him to the point where just the sight of him or time with him can heal. And while there is a foolishness to this belief, it’s understandable when you consider where he’s coming from. You can call it selfishness, but it just feels involuntary--he has a lot of fear when it comes to love.

I mean Comte even says it himself? His words here always strike me: “I want you to understand, it’s because he cherishes you just as you are--more than he cares about his future or his well-being.”

Comte is openly identifying the way that Leonardo has a tendency to give more than is healthy. That Leonardo isn’t hesitating because his feelings are lacking, he’s doing it because he knows it’s going to hurt like a bitch trying to love her and never ask beyond what feels reasonable. (Spoilers: no request is reasonable. That’s the problem here. He’s convinced he deserves nothing.) Therefore turning her into a vampire to stay with him is--consequently, to Leonardo--out of the question. This is the literal hingepoint at which Comte and Leonardo divide; Comte simply tells MC he’ll take full responsibility for asking so much of her. He intends to make her happy with every single resource and skill he has at his disposal. Even if he doubts his ability or fears losing her to vampire rhetoric madness, he’d rather try than live with the regret and immediate loss. Leonardo is more resistant because of his dour outlook, that her fear of immortality is never going to be something that either of them can overcome. And/or he’s likely afraid she’s only going to regret being together after so long, and might succumb to the ridiculous sort of power/greed complexes vampires seem so attracted to by nature.

I think Leonardo is still coming to terms with the idea that he isn't alone in the world in a lot of ways, and I think he's also coming to terms with the idea that immortality does not equate to evil. Sure, human beings on average are probably more open to flexible modes of thinking and living compared to vampires--their maturity is in some ways guaranteed due to the instances they're forced to adapt to survive. However, just one look at the ruling class and oligarchies of all kinds (even just stubborn human beings) reveals how they are not immune to the same sort of megalomania, arrogance, and thoughtless violence purebloods/vampires are capable of.

So I guess I hesitate when it comes to the thought that he only loves her because she's human. If anything, I think he loves her for the fact that she's very rooted in reality--not quite so bound by the extremes that trouble him. It's one of the many reasons I believe Leonardo needs a lot of maturity and patience; the ability to differentiate between his panicked/overwhelmed/hurt reactions versus his calm is a skill in and of itself considering his capacity for concealment. To say nothing of getting him to slow down when this happens, too.

I suppose I think about it in a way that’s similar to how Napoleon’s main story narrative is framed. While Leonardo’s route doesn’t focus on the grandeur of being a former emperor, there is a clear insinuation here that he also craves normalcy? Just a little life, with a person he loves dearly, where he can rest and be himself for once. I think because he gives off such an appearance of steadiness, people fail to see that he is barely holding on--not to mention the kind of experiences he’s been deprived of (the exact security and understanding he so expertly emulates).

Closer to your question, it’s worth mentioning that Leonardo’s life goal for a while was the creation of an immortal human being--in that he fully recognized human beings could not offer what he needed as they were.

He loves humans because of their adaptability, their frequent desire to keep seeking out hope and making the best of the broken pieces they have. But then again, it has more to do with the nature of how frequently that sensibility occurs in humans vs vampires (and immortality in general): mortality does demand some level of necessity to change and grow. Which is one of the largest trauma points for him; the vampires around him just refused to grow up, always demanding at him like children and obsessed with their power complexes.

Thing is I also don't know enough about vampire society to know how correct this perceived ratio is. However, given Comte's similar avoidance of other vampires and general inability to live with them (he and Vlad were literal childhood best friends and Comte can't stand him anymore lmao) I think Leonardo may have more validity here than people give him credit for. Which begs the question--why did he quit trying to make a human immortal? What was it that stopped him? Was it the horror of what needed to be done to achieve it? Or would a potential companion start to fall more in love with the idea of immortality than they do with life itself/him? I think it’s a worthwhile question to ask, given the disdain he seems to aim at Shakespeare in particular--once human, but now emulates all of the violence and insatiability marked by vampirism.

This is where the transition from human to vampire/immortal contains another hingepoint: is Leonardo so incapable of finding a middle ground because he feels like any choice he makes will be a wrong one? Marry a human, deprive them of a normal love where they can grow old together. Marry a human and turn them, what if they are reborn with immortal wounds/psychological harm? What if time proves they get bored of him or hateful, what if they begin to act like the predatory purebloods he hates so much? Marry a pureblood/immortal, and be hounded by his family for heirs--risk being with somebody who will never love him or their children, and only inspire more misery in the world.

Does it make sense how this can really start to become an anxious downspiral for someone like him? How the personal insecurity and life history comes together to just compound stress endlessly?

That's the thing that's important here, I think. Leonardo just needs somebody who is open-minded, firm, and not easily deceived. If one takes a look at Leonardo's main story route, the whole reason everything goes to shit so disastrously is because MC stops listening at a critical point. Granted Leonardo could have been more forthcoming for sure, but when she started assuming Shakespeare was right instead of seeing how Leonardo was feeling/reacting, she responded in ways Leonardo wasn't prepared for. He never wanted to shake her faith or insinuate whatever she is is not good enough for him, and tbh I think Leonardo downspiraled because it was just the same thing all over again. What he is--a vampire and immortal--keeps ruining everything he wants with his life.

#asks #ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp meta #ikevamp leonardo #ikevamp leo #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp comte #can you tell i think too hard about these things kjhdglshf #sorry this reply took me a little longer than i meant to--but i really did want to do the topic proper justice!!#leonardo is such a dear person to me and I can't help but sympathize #people are free to disagree with this but it's just how i feel about the topic #the more i see about him in event stories--the sense this his trembling heart is slowly easing--the less i can believe such things matter #to him all that much tbh #i also think the event where he loses her is just all the more telling too?#i feel like if it really was a matter of principle and not love he would have just accepted it #humans have a v short lifespan--what can be done #sort of reaction #but that's not how he reacted at all: he was a man beside himself with dread and sadness #and even when he meets her reincarnation he can't help but want to be with her again #iirc he starts shaking at the slightest mention of when she died--and shows a lot less ability to resist the urge to turn her #so anywho brief summation is that i think this is more about so many sad boy hours and fear of widespread immortal megalomania #than it is abt hatred for immortality #he has no confidence good things can last without being warped--and that's the key issue here #'nothing gold can stay'#long post #rambles #not incorrect quotes #if you manage to read this without falling asleep i applaud you ajkhldghkfjsdg #thanks for the ask tho--i love any excuse to yell abt leo <333

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queenofcats17 · 3 years

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The Ink Demonth 13

Today is Trust

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There was no one Bertram trusted at his company more than Lacie. She was his second in command. He trusted her input both in matters of business and mechanics above all others, and there were some attractions of his that only Lacie was allowed to work on.

Lacie returned this trust in kind, trusting that Bertram would have her back in times of trouble and put the safety of her and his workers first.

It hadn’t always been this way, of course.

When Bertram had first transitioned from architecture to theme parks, he had still been unlearning quite a lot of the things his parents had taught him growing up. One of these things being his father’s stances on race, gender, and class. As such, his first meeting with Lacie had been…less than ideal.

Although he was actively trying to unlearn these things, his first instinct upon seeing Lacie when she entered his office for her interview was disdain. She had three strikes against her, going by his father’s logic. And although he tried to banish these feelings, he was sure the momentary disdain showed on his face upon seeing her.

“Would you rather I leave, Mr. Piedmont?” Her words were polite and her tone was calm and even, but he could feel the venom that hid behind that calm.

Bertram awkwardly cleared his throat. “No,” he replied. “Please sit down, Miss Benton. Let us begin the interview.”

Lacie didn’t look entirely convinced, but she sat down anyway and they began the interview. She was more than qualified for the position of engineer, so he had naturally hired her. He had wanted to compliment her qualifications, but had thought better of it. It seemed inappropriate to go out of his way to try and ingratiate himself to her.

Earning her trust turned out to be a long process, which he had expected to a certain extent after his disastrous first impression. Their interactions were overly polite, with both of them only ever exchanging words for work. Lacie made no effort to interact with him unless he absolutely had to. Bertram had to keep reminding himself that she had every reason to be wary and distrustful of him. It was his responsibility to prove he was worthy of her trust. Actions spoke louder than words, after all.

He made sure to pay all of his employees a fair wage, made sure they would be compensated and protected in the event of an injury, made sure they would be protected from being taken advantage of. If a contractor or client disrespected his workers, he would defend said workers. And if the client tried to take advantage of the workers, the client was promptly dropped. It certainly hurt him in the early days, but Bertram was determined. This was not a principle that he would budge on. He would be a better man than his father.

Lacie took note of these actions, her opinion of him slowly beginning to change.

Still, it was a good many years before she trusted him enough to be open with him. She had to make sure that this wasn’t just a one-off thing for him, that he wouldn’t abandon these practices once his business got off the ground. But he seemed genuine and determined to keep to these practices.

He was so genuine it was almost embarrassing.

So, she started to talk to him a bit more, saying hello when she saw him or remarking on books she was reading. Bertram’s visible excitement at her slowly opening up was even more adorable. He started to ask for her opinion on designs more after that, taking her thoughts into account when constructing the attractions.

It took another year after her beginning to open up before she began to think of him as a friend.

It was at that point that she started to actually spend time with him when it wasn’t necessary for work. They began to share their feelings and thoughts with each other. Lacie felt safe expressing her concerns to Bertram without fear of repercussions. Some of the things she had to say were hard to hear, but Bertram tried to take them to heart.

From then on, Lacie was Bertram’s second in command. Not everyone was pleased with this, but Bertram left no room for argument. This was the person he had chosen to put his trust in, and if they didn't like it they didn't have to stay.

#bendy and the ink machine #fanfiction #the ink demonth #bertrum piedmont #lacie benton

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cruelfeline · 4 years

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Watching season one, and remembering some of Catra’s time with the Best Friend Squad in season five, I’m having thoughts about reactions to magic.

Both Adora and Catra, upon first leaving the Horde and interacting with magic for the first time, are generally uncomfortable with it, even alarmed by it. It appears weird, unnatural, and uncontrollable to them. It makes them wary and near-panicky (see: Catra on Krytis). These reactions make me wonder about Hordak’s initial days on Etheria.

I think I remember that, during the last stream, Stevenson mentioned that Hordak, upon first coming to Etheria, found it to be a strange, unwelcoming place, a world that followed magical rules he was unfamiliar with.

Between that little tidbit and Adora and Catra’s own initial reactions to magic, I find myself thinking about how frightening Etheria must have been for Hordak, upon his arrival. He, a Horde clone born and raised and sheltered aboard a sterile ship, likely knowing nothing of magic given Prime’s disdain for it, suddenly alone on a world teeming with it. He likely had no idea how it worked, or how to manage it. The rules and principles it followed likely made little sense to him. Or, even worse: he might have learned that magic was dangerous and sinful, given Prime’s views.

So not only was he stranded on this world without his brothers, without the comfort of the hivemind, with his body failing him, but he had to deal with what were essentially unpredictable (and potentially blasphemous) aberrations of physics happening on a near-constant basis.

It’s no wonder he didn’t just settle down on Etheria. It’s no wonder he sequestered himself away among machines and technology. Not only was he still under the influence of a lifetime of brainwashing, but the planet, with its alien magic, must have been absolutely terrifying to him.

I think that that, among other things, is important to remember. Many of us viewers, conditioned to see magic as something lovely and whimsical, look at Etheria as a fairy-tale paradise, but to Hordak? To Hordak, it was likely utterly incomprehensible and thus very, very frightening.

#hordak

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lambs-rest · 3 years

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Echoes of a Fallen Star

Track: Uta Yo - Kaho Nakamura (Spotify | YT)

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The return to the Crystarium was one of relative silence and introspection. It didn’t last, once they entered the Exedra. Crafters, guards, labourers and healers all gathered in a crowd, each cluster resembling some sort of order as they milled about, eager to meet with the leaders of their professions. G’raha stood at the front of it all, watching, tension in his face. When he spotted them, he forced a smile.

“Dare I ask what’s going on?” Alphinaud said, keeping a wary eye on the people as they met off to the side. Perhaps Elidibus had made a second pass at the Crystarium?

“The vast majority of those gathered here are presently in the employ of the guard, or else one of facets…and no longer wish to be so.”

Granye had to double take at his words. “What? Why?”

She had dabbled in work at the Mean several times, and found it easy to do business with them. The pay was fair and the folks in charge had been friendly enough. And the guard. How could so many of them want to leave? Surely they knew that Lakeland was still in need of protecting, even without the threat of Vauthry and sin eaters?

G’raha looked at her tiredly. “We have the ‘Warrior of Light’ to thank for this. Apparently, he is quite the inspiration.”

Granye wrinkled her nose in disdain and folded her arms. “If they knew half the shite a ‘Warrior of Light’ goes through, none of ‘em would be so eager to leave their jobs.”

“We’ve managed to convince most of them to postpone their resignations until others can be found to take the vacant jobs. In principle, all are free to change vocation at any time – but a city does require a certain number people in these positions if it is expected to function.”

Of course. The fewer hands to made goods, the less there would be to trade. The fewer guards, the more inhospitable the surrounding lands. She had to wonder if it was all part of Elidibus’ grand scheme. Knowing full well how cunning Ascians were in general, she wouldn’t be surprised to find that the case.

But still, why was he so pressed to inspire them, and under the Warrior of Light mantle nonetheless? Elidibus was unlike his comrades, no matter what he told them to think. Maybe that’s why they were having such an impossible time figuring him out…

“It’s you! The Warrior of Darkness!”

She almost jumped at the sudden call that interrupted her thoughts. When she looked to find the speaker, she recognised the Galdjent in his red-cloaked Crystarium tabard, and his Hume friend in blue. Lyna noticed them peel from the Crystarium guards who were planning to resign, and Granye was not oblivious to the muted disappointed in her expression.

The duo approached her, Vonard nodding. “You understand, don’t you? Someone’s going to have to look after this place once you’re gone. We just want to be ready to do our bit when the time comes.”

Theyler nodded in agreement. “And not only here, but everywhere! Which is why we’ve got to get out there and lend a hand to those in need.”

It was hard, to look at their eager, well-meaning faces and feel the words well up inside her.

“I’m sorry, but I dinnae agree with ye.”

There was a moment of silence in their group. G’raha’s ears pricked, startled. Vonard and Theyler stared, shocked, disbelieving of what they heard. Granye’s face scrunched as she struggled to find the right words.

“I’s nae that folk dinnae need the help. But if everyone decides to become adventurers, what’s s’posed to happen to the folks left behind? The Crystarium’s only as safe as it is because o’ the guard. It only managed to rival Eulmore because o’ folk like the traders an’ crafters who suddenly want to leave. Someone like me can help with irregular threats, or the little things here an’ there – that’s how I started, really. But I started at all because I had no-one who counted on me to stay.”

She huffed and shook her head. “If yer set on it, fine. But I just hope yer nae doin’ this because ye want to be heroes. Crystarium folk wouldnae be free an’ safe if it wasnae fer guards like you lot. Guards, if I remember ye sayin’ just the other day on the road, that’re already too thin to run proper patrols. If ye just want to help folks, then take a good look at where yer really needed, an’ go from there.” Granye nodded her head over them, towards the resigning flock. “Ye ken the Crystarium better’n I do. Ye tell me what’ll happen if everyone who wants to leave does, all at once, right now.”

Thelyer glanced back, seeing the faces of men and women he knew and spoke to every day. He knew their roles, where they worked, who they were.

Thoughts of a derelict Crystarium flashed through his mind: gleaming crystal sheets missing from their panes, shattered. Unkempt plants, running wild from the plots at Sweetsieve and the Hortorium. Broken gates of the Rookery, swinging open on rusted hinges…

“…Where I’m from, adventurer’s are so common, there’s even a guild that spans three states for em. Think of an area from the Greatwood to Kholusia! But I’ll tell ye right now, I’ve never found a place as peaceful and safe as the Crystarium, and it isnae heroes or adventurers who make it so.” She leaned to one side, brows pushing together when she saw their dampened spirits.

“I ken i’s nae what ye want to hear, ‘specially from me.” Granye offered. “But believe me when I say the Crystarium’s nae the only place where people suddenly want to leave. I’s easy to look at a place like Sullen or Wright an’ think one good deed can make things better. Sometimes it can. But a town or a city’s nothin’ without good folk to keep it safe and runnin’.”

She reached out and clapped the now brooding Vonard on the shoulder, prompting him to look at her. “Look. Give it a shot. I willnae say it’s a terrible life. But if it dinnae work out, dinnae force yerselves to keep on it. Think about comin’ back, or even settlin’ down somewhere else ye really feel like yer needed there.” Granye looked from Vonard down to Theyler and smiled. “I will say, yer already smarter’n me when I started.”

The Hume shared a look with his friend. “How?”

“Yer headin’ off together. Ye ken how long it took me to find this lot?” she laughed, thumbing at the Scions at her back. “Four years. An’ they found me! Travellin’ alone sucks, an’ it’s dangerous. Keep each other safe, an’ dinnae get upset over little disagreements. Talk through it, an’ fer the love of yer freshly returned night sky, do not go into suspicious ruins. Especially ones that lead into mountains or caves or underground! Ye find all sorts of weird shite in those, an’ rarely anythin’ good!” She held her chin thoughtfully. “What else… Be nice to the locals, and dinnae be afraid to ask fer help if yer lost or hurt. An’ if somethin’ gives ye the heebie jeebies, listen to yerself and steer clear. If I had a gil fer every time I thought ‘Oh, just a quick peek!’ before gettin’ into all sorts of shite, I’d be rich enough to buy the whole bloody marketplace out.”

Alphinaud snorted, earning Granye’s stare. “Ye got any better advice, Alphie?” she challenged.

“Hmm… Find a healer if you can. Having an ally to help your stay on your feet in a fight is invaluable, wouldn’t you say, Granye?” he promptly cheekily.

Granye reached over and wrapped her arm around him in a gentle headlock. “Aye, aye, yer a wonderful healer, ye little menace. I’d be dead five times over if not fer yer shields.”

“Always ask about local legends.” Thancred offered suddenly, ignoring Alphinaud’s flailing. “You’ll find there’s often a grain of truth to them, but you have to use your wits to decide if that truth it in your favour, or against you.”

Alisaie raised a finger. “I might add; don’t slack on your training. You may have put aside the Crystarium guard routine, but the wild beasts beyond Lakeland can come in particularly ferocious forms that such a regimen will hardly have prepared you for. Oh, and if you must crack your coinpurse at Mord Souq, pick the Everburning Bounty, trust me.”

Granye let go of Alphie and shuddered at the memory of Rhon Ron’s stall.

Urianger lowered his arm from his head. “…The fae are tricksome beings. With pixies, think not as though thou art negotiating with an adult, but a child. Treat them kindly, and bring to them gifts shouldst thou require their aid. Colourful glass and shimmering insect wings are much favoured.”

Ryne could only offer a shrug when the two slowly looked at her, bracing for another sudden outpouring of wisdom. “I can only say to know your limits, and rest when you need to.”

Vonard and Theyler looked at each other once again, before the Galdjent spoke. “All of you, thank you. We’ll remember what you’ve told us – every word.” he added, pointedly looking at Granye.

They stood tall and made the Crystarium salute one final time before they turned and left, saying a brief farewell to Lyna as their commander.

G’raha sighed. “I thank you for giving them such a valuable farewell. It pains me to be unable to back their decision in such a situation.”

“Ye have yer own responsibilities, robin.” Granye soothed. “Ye need them here. Hardly makes sense fer ye to wave them off with a big ol’ grin.” She looked out behind them watching the duo head to the stairs leading to the Landing. “…I do hope they have a good go at it, really.”

Thancred nodded at her. “You know, I feel like we learned more about your days before joining the Scions right now than you’ve ever shared with us.”

Granye made a face. “There’s just nae much to tell, really. It was bloody miserable. Find a bar, drink some grog, play a song, pass out in me room, or a stack o’ hay if it was really bad.”

“What brought you to Gridania, then?” Alisaie asked.

“That’s right. I had nearly forgotten we three shared a carriage to the city.” Alphinaud laughed. “It seems so long ago…”

As Alphinaud’s voice faded, another sound rose in their ears. A strange rumbling, crackling noise, high above them in the sky, like a storm, thought I was a perfectly clear blue, sunny day.

Until, suddenly, it wasn’t.

All lifted their heads skyward as darkness rolled over the sky. Churning, silken dark grey clouds swept over the Crystarium in a wave, blotting out the sun, drowning them all in the darkness of a storm. A flash of lightning arced from the nexus of the swirling mass of clouds, snapping over them with a tremendous crash. Granye expected rain to suddenly come pouring down…not a pinprick of golden light to swell and grow and split the clouds open like a vortex. Not for screaming streaks of fiery light to fall from the heavens and rocket over their heads and into the horizon, the light from their passage bouncing and shimmering off the many-faceted front of the Crystal Tower.

She froze, staring up at the sight with wide eyes and an open mouth.

She remembered this.

Had the very same vision not come to her, some four years ago, when she rode in the back of the very carriage Alphinaud mentioned seconds earlier? The sparkling comets that streaked out like fireworks, reaching every corner of the sky, plummeting to earth like-

“…The Final Days…”

Could it really have been…? Did she see that calamitous event, years and years ago, when the world in her mind was still only as big as the Allied States?

The world grew darker still, with only the harsh orange glow from above to light the frightened faces of those below, tainting the blue crystal domes and Tower with a haze of warm light. The people were frightened, frantic, cowering and shaking.

“Hear… Feel… Think…”

Ice gripped her veins suddenly. Those words…that slow, echoing feminine voice. Hydaelyn.

But why? Why, after all this time, here, on the First-!?

“I-I hear a voice!”

“You too? B-But, why does it feel like it’s inside my head?”

Voices in the crowd reached her ears, and Granye whipped her head toward them in horror before she spun to her friends, fear gripping her tight. “Do ye all-?”

Alisaie’s slow nod was all she needed. They were all hearing Her.

“What’s She doin’!?” Granye hissed, looking back up at the sky. Her first instinct was to grab them and run – to stuff them in the deepest pits of the Tower and shield them from Her influence.

“Did I not tell you, my friends!?”

Granye shuddered, turning slowly, eyes settling on the familiar stolen form that confidently strode into the Exedra. Elidibus made his return amidst the end of the world, still wearing Ardbert’s face and speaking those awful, wrong words in his voice. She wondered spitefully, as she glared at him, and a low whine built in her ears, if he had gone to such lengths to steal such an intangible aspect of Ardbert’s being as his voice, just to get under her skin.

The whine built into a pressure, crushing down on her senses until she was forced to shut her eyes and grimace against it. Only when she felt Ryne’s hand on hers, and heard her concerned, quietened voice, did Granye open her eyes.

And the sky….was clear. The comets were gone, and the blackened clouds, vanished.

“What you hear is the voice of Light itself, and it has blessed you with its power! Welcome to the fold!”

Ardbert’s mangled voice spouting those words poisoned her ears, and the murmurs of the bewildered and excited crowd rose higher, as Granye lowered her gaze back from the sky. Elidibus was leaving, his back turned from the crowd, no doubt planning to get himself out of their sight before he teleported away. Again, as before under the boughs of the Greatwood, Granye felt consumed with the urge to stop him.

This time, she allowed it to drive her steps forward, to carry her into a run across the stone floor, skirting the distracted citizens.

“Wait.”

Her first attempt fell on deaf ears, flat and hoarse.

“Wait!”

Though her voice lifted, surely to his ears that time, he continued to the stairs.

“Seven hells, I said wait!”

Her fingers caught the crook of his arm, halting him dead with one foot on the stairs and the other still on the floor. Barely had her touch landed before he reacted, pulling his arm free and twisting it out of her grasp. The move came so violently and abruptly that Granye stepped back, her hand hovering outstretched as Elidibus turned on her, his eyes sharp and cold and furious. She could only hold such a stare for a moment before she lowered her eyes and her hand. Too intense. It was much too intense to pretend she could face such a stare, such a hateful response to so small a touch.

Even if someone had seen and it had imperilled his scheme, he could not have helped himself from behaving so extremely. Her touch was poison, draining the life from even that which was eternal.

“…Why’re ye suddenly doin’ Her dirty work for Her?”

Elidibus narrowed his eyes at her. “Emet-Selch may have entertained your questions, but I shall not.”

The Scions had reached them by then, attempting not to attract attention from the crowd but close enough to listen, and to act if need be.

“But it was yer doin’.” she pressed. “Why…that?”

She managed to look at him, and his ire had quelled enough to recover his impassive attitude – enough to give her an answer, and to search her confused eyes for one of his own. She knew the truth. Suspected it, at least, about the connection of the falling stars and their fragmented souls. All she wanted was confirmation.

“It is the most convenient illusion apt to awaken what little remains of the power that once resided in such sundered souls. A power which you and yours call the Echo.”

Elidibus fancied he could see the gears in her head turning – the revelation dawning over her face like a new morning.

“You think it a rarity, but the name with which you refer to it is more accurate than you can comprehend. An echo indeed; of a symphony. It is a mere fraction of what men, in their completeness, once possessed. Even those among you who tower over others in the gift have only the faintest trace of it. But though sundered and forgotten, through death and mocking rebirth…it has persisted. A whisper of our past, burned into your very aether – along with the sight of our end.”

Something he said had struck her, evidently. The way she leaned back from him, finally, and looked down at the floor, how her eyebrows pinched and her eyes flickered here and there, as if visually piecing something together.

“Through the rekindling of memory, I have awoken the ability – just as Hydaelyn is wont to do when she has need of new minions.”

She slowly lifted her head. He could see the question on her lips…but he would entertain her no more. The darkness enveloped Elidibus, tendrils from the blackness at his back creeping around his discreetly and absorbing his form into the shadows.

-~-~-~-~-~-

Hear… Think… Feel…

White-gold eyes flew open with a start.

Lahabrea stared up at the ceiling of the inn room with gasping breaths, his hands crushing the blanket he’d dozed off atop in their grip.

He closed his eyes firmly, silently chastising himself. He wasn’t even directly confronted with Her at the Glacier, and he was having nightmares about Her! Such weakness…

Lahabrea inhaled, calming his breaths before sitting out and getting off the bed. He’d been thoroughly exhausted after moving Gaia’s luggage into her new room. To be sure, so was she. He would vividly remember the struggle to push the cart up the ramp, and the distant cheers they’d heard once they reached the top.

Why Glynard and some of his patrons had been watching them from the Wandering Stairs, he would never understand.

Gaia had collapsed back on one of the beds in her room, and Lahabrea had tottered off, exhausted, to his, both of them eager to rest.

The room was dark, he realised as he stood up and made his way across to the kitchen side. He really hadn’t meant to sleep all afternoon. Granye wasn’t back, which meant there was probably some new crisis or another in the Greatwood they were dealing with. He blearily stared at the fruit bowl on the counter before picking up an apple and meandering his way back up to the desk.

Maybe it was a straggler sin eater causing a ruckus, or the Children of the Everlasting Dark? He lifted the apple to his mouth, about to take a bite, when a streak of light rocketed past the open window and stopped him dead. His eyes panned over to the left and he lowered the fruit, slowly and cautiously approaching the window.

He knew the sight that greeted him well. The soot-black roiling clouds, the burning light in the sky, spitting comets over the world.

But why would Hydaelyn be prompting such an image now, when the First had only just been saved from the Light? Surely the First was not so swiftly and so dangerously imperilled by the return of night?

Lahabrea’s face crumpled with discomfort. He could feel pressure rapidly building in his ears and hear a whine, rising in pitch until it was all he could hear…and then it all stopped at once, and the scene of the Final Days melted away like snow before his eyes.

The apple fell from his hand, bouncing on the floor and rolling away as Lahabrea sprinted to the door and pulled it open, causing it to rattle on its sturdy hinges. The Master of Suites called out to him as he ran, the door to their room left open carelessly in his wake.

There was only one explanation for the starshower that ended so suddenly. Visions of such images were usually imparted or invited upon individuals – a private moment in the mind. Real, tangible events of comets falling from the heavens did not end so quickly.

Which meant it was an illusion. And there was only one person left with the strength to conjure such a thing on such a magnitude.

He ran towards the Exedra, towards the crowd he could see in the distance. Surely that was a sign! Surely that would lead him to-!

Lahabrea skidded to a stop before he even entered the Exedra proper. He didn’t need to take a step further to see the achingly familiar darkness, swirling around the figure of a man upon the steps leading to the aetheryte plaza.

A man that was gone before he could even open his mouth to shout the Emissary’s name.

He could have howled for the injustice of it all. Of course he was moments too late to call out to Elidibus. Of course she was left there, standing dumbly in the Emissary’s wake, so clearly having spoken to him before his exit.

His hands curled into tight fists, shaking, his chest rising and falling with his breaths, and his anger.

It was with a clenched jaw and a ferrous scowl that he turned and marched back to his room.

They knew Zenos had reclaimed his flesh, and that Elidibus had been unaccounted for. More than that, Granye’s odd behaviour in the morning told him all he needed to know – she was keeping him in the dark. From a logical standpoint, it was to be expected. Emet-Selch had bucked the trend and ingratiated himself in her routine, and Lahabrea had been lucky enough to have arrived to see the Architect introduce himself to the Scions.

How far that had gotten him…

The Manager watched him return, walk past the desk silently and return to his room, quietly shutting the door. When inside, Lahabrea stood there, numb, his eyes falling upon the abandoned red apple that sat on the floor, innocently out of place. His expression twisted.

Emet had said it to him often enough that he’d made no bother to contact Elidibus and tell him he was alive and with their enemy. Lahabrea would be lying if he said he didn’t know why.

Elidibus…was not as he once was. None of them were, really, but with Elidibus the change was on a deeper, fundamental level, and neither Lahabrea nor Emet-Selch had any idea how the Emissary would take Lahabrea’s stunted state of being…

Lahabrea bent over and picked up the apple, rinsing it clean before biting into the flesh, eating the fruit before it bruised from the drop.

He couldn’t afford to think about the fear of what Elidibus might do. Instead, he clung to his own anger at Granye, for what she did do. He thought about how to bring it up with her, what he would say – if he should say anything at all!

By the time he tossed the apple core in the bin, he had decided. He would say nothing, He would pretend he was ignorant of the Emissary’s presence on the First, and when next Granye had to leave him unsupervised, he would leave. If he took the Grani, it would be almost impossible for them to catch up to him in a timely manner. He would find Elidibus and he would…

He would what? Beg not to be penned in some place for his own safety? Beg not to be assigned another supervisor in his even weaker state? He was nothing when put beside another member of the Convocation – even the fragments raised to their seat. He could do nothing to help the cause.

Lahabrea found his hands curled into a fist yet again as he leaned over the sink and stare into the basin. His mind ran in a circle of anger and despair at his own weakness. Around and around and around until-

Until the door opened, and he turned to see her, standing in the doorway as she closed the door, her every move subdued and slow.

Granye’s mind was a mess. From the moment Elidibus’ words clicked, and Urianger’s later expansions on the Echo’s true nature in their private meeting in the Ocular, she was stuck on why?

Why, if the power resided within them all, was she the one to take on so much? Why did she have to be the Source’s only ‘Warrior of Light’? Of course there were those with the Echo – Arenvald and Krile, and even Fordola with her artificial Resonant – who fought and struggled on the front lines.

But how many of them had stained their hands with the blood of ancients? Of mad wyrms and madder still men, who dreamed of gods and power and a wonderful death?

Why had she been the one to throw away a life of blissful ignorance and peace, for one of war and suffering? And unlike Ardbert, she had done it alone, without a group of friends who could stand by her side at every hurdle, through every fight without risk of losing their minds.

There were others in of the Source who were of better character than her – consistently brave, skilled leaders with morals and firm beliefs. So why was she the only one to be forced down such an excruciating road, forced to deal the killing blow, always?

She took off her bow and leaned it on the dresser.

“You cannot hide me from him.”

Granye stilled under Lahabrea’s snarl.

“You cannot keep me separated from my brethren!”

‘I know’, was what she wanted to say. But her lips would not move, and her mouth was dry.

“How long did you think you could obfuscate the fact that he was here?” Lahabrea hissed, coming to stand at the bottom of the steps, to glare and seethe with unexpected anger at her lack of words.

When Granye turned her head to look at him, his next string of outraged words evaporated. Her expression was dead. Exhaustion seeped into every part of her face, except her eyes. She stared at him with as much intensity as he did her. Her eyes were angry and hurt. Had she the strength to voice the questioning accusation that burned most hotly on her tongue, Lahabrea might’ve heard her ask him why he never told her the truth about the Echo, and Hydaelyn’s call.

But Granye knew, that Lahabrea would never answer her. He never answered questions about the truth of their world, especially not when she wanted to know. He would never tell her why he refrained from correcting their assumptions, only scoffed at them for it.

He would never impart their pathetic mortal minds with more knowledge than he deemed they were due.

As she stared him down, he read it in her eyes.

‘How do you like being the ignorant mortal?’

——————————

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#muse; insufferable lover #muse; mister lahee #granye #granye x lahabrea #trying to write all the way up to where i've left Granye to languish in the msq fhkhsajkdas #because if i got forward I'M NOT COMING BACK #the song is just really nice in general but i like how it has these melancholic highs and lows

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petitepistol · 4 years

Note

“i brought you a blanket.”

Elena was not on the best of terms with Cloud Strife.

This was a funny thing, the fact she'd managed to carry a grudge for years. By now she was amiable with most of the posse formerly known as AVALANCHE, but she did her best to carry a torch of disdain for Strife himself. Mainly on principle. He liked to make it difficult for her though, given the fact that these days he'd save his colder glares for her male colleagues. Rufus was the one who was truly worth his glower, Reno was a perpetual pain in the backside, and as much of a gentleman as Rude was she couldn't imagine Strife wasn't aware of the fact that the man in shades was very interested in Tifa. It was probably in much the same way that he was wary of Tseng because though the Gainsborough girl had long since returned to the lifestream, one does not just forget a threat.

These were Elena's theories on the subject of why Strife was being so godawfully nice to her, as she huddled herself in the blanket he'd offered. Her eyebrows were furrowed as she forced the lump in her throat to pass. If he was going to be civil, she had to be civil as well. It just wouldn't do to let the weird stolen valor wannabe ex-SOLDIER turned Sephiroth clone turned legitimate hero to one-up her in the decorum department.

"You didn't have to, but...thanks." There. Her courtesy quotient had been met and she could return to regarding him with a vague sense of ever softening derision.

@backwaterheroics

#asks #ic #backwaterheroics #damn strife why you gotta be all nice and make my girl look cranky lmao

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acathea · 4 years

Text

The Ridiculously Detailed Inquisitor Questionnaire that No One Needed

I’m just five years late for this. Taashath edition, impossibly long. @customhawke‘s inquisitor quiz was extremely time consuming to fill out but so fun!

PART ONE: APPEARANCE/PERSONALITY/BASIC FACTS

Give some basics for the Inquisitor:

Name: Taashath Adaar

Age: 32 (By the end of Trespasser, 34.). Born on Drakonis 3rd, 9:9 Dragon.

Race: Qunari

Gender/preferred pronouns: Trans Woman – She/her

Class (warrior/rogue/mage): Warrior

Preferred weapon/spell type: Two-Handed Swords

Specialization: Champion

Romance: Josephine

Give a detailed description of your Inquisitor.

Taashath has coppery, almost metallic-looking skin and bright red eyes surrounded by a black sclera. She has thick, long crimson hair that falls past her waist, which she keeps tied in a simple braid when out on missions. She takes excellent care of it and is very proud of the way it looks. Her eyebrows are dark, thick, and arched, of a red so dark it almost looks black if the sun is not shining on them. Her face is heart-shaped, with high and pronounced cheekbones and deep-set eyes, where subtle crows-feet rest, made more apparent when she smiles. Crowning her head are two large, dark horns that end in an upwards tip, chipped in places from her many fights throughout the years.

Taashath is tall compared to the other races, but stands at a rather short height for a qunari - at 6’9’’ft (205cm). Her body is muscular and toned, shaped from years of fighting and travelling. It’s scarred in numerous places, and it’s why she tends to wear clothing that covers her entire body not to show them.

Does the Inquisitor have any scars/tattoos before the game’s events? If so, tell how they got them/their meaning (for example, what elvhen god does Inquisitor Lavellan’s vallaslin represent, and why did they choose them?)

A horizontal scar crosses the length of the right corner of her mouth to her cheekbone, that she got on a job while still an inexperienced warrior. The debris from the explosion at the Temple of Sacred Ashes also hit her left eyebrow, leaving a nasty mark. Her body is scarred in numerous places due to her life work as a mercenary, notably her arms, and she always makes a point of covering them. Even when it should be too hot for long sleeves.

She wears mostly practical clothing, with little space for frivolousness. Usually in the dark colours of the Inquisition. After the events of the main game, she allows herself some prettier clothing and lighter colour schemes.

OPINIONS. Give your Inquisitor’s stance on:

The Chantry: Taashath dislikes the Chantry and would rather not be called the Herald of their Prophet. She doesn’t have any fond memories regarding priests of the Chantry, but only of the stones they would throw at her and her parents when passing through a village. She is interested in the history of the Chantry. She especially takes time to study it all in her time in Skyhold, but she holds no illusion that most in the Chantry want her dead. She has no issues with the Maker or Andraste, per se, however, even though she doesn’t believe in any kind of higher power.

Tevinter: Taashath has mixed feelings about Tevinter. She knows of the complicated history between the Qunari and the Imperium – but also, she’s Vashoth. Does that really apply to her? Of course, she holds mostly disdain for the way Tevinter controls its people and enslaves everyone they deem inferior. But she’s also intrigued by the culture of knowledge-seeking, were it not corrupted by lust for power.

Ferelden: It’s… brown. And cold. And it rains a lot. Taashath is more used to the warmth of the north, the brightness of it, but she falls in love with the culture and the people. Would she live in Ferelden? Absolutely not. But she doesn’t hate it.

Orlais: Orlais is… a very sore spot for her. For a chunk of her young adulthood, Taashath worked towards being admitted into the University of Orlais, her biggest dream. She wanted to study history and languages and geography. She wanted to walk in the University’s library and devote her life to knowledge. They laughed in her face, refused her entrance and kicked her out. Her experiences in Orlais after that were riddled with anxiety. When she visited the Winter Palace, however, she enjoyed beating the orlesian nobles that looked down on her at their own Game. She doesn’t like orlesians much, except a select few, and visiting the country is always the last thing she’s looking forward to.

Mages/Magic: Magic has always served Taashath well, and she sometimes envies those she encounters who have the gift. She is a big supporter of the mages’ freedom, although she agrees that they need a place where to study their magic – one where they’re not prisoners, maybe. But she’s not a fool, and she knows it can be dangerous – just like the weapons she carries.

Templars: While they never bothered her personally, Taashath is acutely aware of the abuses the Templars perpetuate and how power-hungry they can be, as she heard of the events of Kirkwall. She thinks their abilities may be of some use. Still, their affiliation with the Chantry and their methods don’t align with her moral principles. She would only ally with them if it was the only thing she could do. There must be some other way to protect people from demons other than Templars.

The Mage/Templar War: She believes it was inevitable. Wherever she went in Southern Thedas, she would always hear of the abuses of the Templars – either from apostates who wanted to join the Valo-Kas, or from the people they encountered. When the Chantry in Kirkwall exploded, she was surprised it didn’t have major consequences in all of Thedas sooner, taking another three years for the rebellion to fully take place. She supports the mages’ freedom.

The Dalish and City Elves: She is fascinated by the ways of the Dalish and would trade everything of value she has for the chance of learning more of their history and culture - and Shaevra is more than happy to share her culture with someone who seems to deeply appreciate it. She fails to make the connection between the nomadic way of the Dalish and the life she was living travelling with her parents. In regards to the city elves, she never knew much about them. It was only after becoming Inquisitor that she learned more of them from the servants in Skyhold. Then she sees first hand their living conditions in Orlais, and she feels much pity for them – although she admires their strength and sense of community.

Dwarves: Taashath hasn’t had much chance of seeing how the dwarves live in their thaigs, although she’s very curious about it – again, only after becoming Inquisitor does she have an opportunity to experience more of their culture. She’s more used to dealing with the Merchants’ Guild and surface dwarves. While she doesn’t have a particular liking for them, she also has no issues with them – unless they call her an ox-woman, which has unfortunately happened on more than one occasion.

Qunari/Tal-Vashoth (do they even know the difference?): It’s… complicated. She’s qunari herself, although she is Vashoth. For followers of the Qun, she is nothing – like she doesn’t exist. For non-qunari, she is just like them, so she’s seen as a violent savage before a person. The only other example of qunari outside of the Qun are Tal-Vashoth like her parents, which she ran from because she believed she’d be better off without them. The others are either the Tal-Vashoth she is hired to kill, or the ones she works with, with whom she doesn’t feel any real connection to. It’s because of her feeling like she doesn’t have a culture of her own that Taashath is so interested in those of others. She feels like a fish out of water and is both interested in the ways of the followers of the Qun and wary of them. As I said, it’s complicated, and the only subject that genuinely makes her head hurt when she thinks about it.

Humans: In her youth, Taashath used to idolize humans. She wanted to be like them, to be one of them – mostly because she only wished to have a roof over her head and not be thrown out of villages having sticks and stones thrown at them. She used to think that they must have been right about her parents, that they were savages and if only they allowed her in, they would see she was not like them. Now it’s different. Taashath has been hurt too many times by humans. She is wary and distrustful of them – the reason why she was convinced she wouldn’t have survived the events of the Conclave is that she was a qunari amidst angry humans. Of course, she can be swayed to think differently of some humans, but she treads very carefully when dealing with them. She likes the Avvar, though, and enjoys her time in the Frostbacks because of them.

What is their favourite place to travel to?

The Hissing Wastes. She loves the vastness of it, the climate, she loves the oasis. It’s also where she tames her wyvern mount, so it holds a special place in her heart.

Their least favourite?

Val Royeaux/the Winter Palace. It makes her feel anxious – she always has to watch her step and her mouth, always has to make sure she appears perfect in every way. It makes it hard to enjoy the architecture and pretty colours.

Honourable mention: the Fallow Mire. She hated being there, hated the climate, hated the mud and the water and the rain and everything that was there. She was glad to be out of that wretched place.

Describe what your Inquisitor is like before the game’s events–preferably, choose three words that describe best. Then explain why those adjectives are appropriate descriptors.

Quiet – During her travels, Taashath learned what misunderstood words might bring her in human society, and afterwards, it just stuck. She rarely spoke unless spoken to, and she much preferred entrusting her thoughts and musings to diaries and poetry rather than spoken words.

Apathetic – Or at least, on the surface. Taashath forces herself to appear unbothered and undisturbed by anything because, as usual, people will assume the worst when she expresses any kind of positive or negative emotions. This actually drives people away from her, which is… not what she’s aiming for when she does that. This also results in her basically shutting down her emotional side - which is ironically exactly what people expect of a qunari. It’s hard for her to trust people, to let herself go and be who she is – something that she only allows herself in private - and in turn, this created a sort of shell around her that, at some point, became more of prison than a protective measure.

Level-headed – Taashath takes a lot of time to think things over. What she says, what she does is always the result of careful calculation and pondering. Not just in dealing with people, but with situations that come about as well. This makes her an excellent leader because she – usually – does not let emotions speak for her. There are a few exceptions, though.

Does your Inquisitor change over the course of the game’s events? If so, how? What events affected their character arc the most?

It’s a mixed bag of feelings. Taashath learns to voice her feelings, her opinions, not to filter herself as much as she was used to and learns how to make friends. But after the events of the main game, the weight of being Inquisitor starts being too much. Every decision she makes leads to major consequences for the people involved - and even those who weren’t! - and they’re not always predictable. Each failure weighs on her even more. Sometimes, she feels herself becoming paralyzed by fear and doubt, and it’s only through the connections she’s made over the years in the Inquisition that she doesn’t break.

Being a lover of history and knowledge, seeing what happened to Ameridan shocked her quite a bit. Not only does she now doubt everything she’s ever read, but she’s also afraid that – with time – the Chantry will do the same to her. That they will erase her from history, make her a human, and rid the records of there ever being an Inquisitor named Taashath Adaar, of the qunari peoples. It’s disturbing, and she feels much pity for Ameridan and what was done to him. The events of the Descent also shake her, but mostly because she realizes there is so much more to Thedas than she realized. She wonders what other things there are still to discover or uncover.

The events of Trespasser truly break her. She fears and dislikes what the Inquisition is becoming, and she feels that everything is slipping out of her control. Even her advisors start making decisions without her, taking actions she wouldn’t have approved of. She thinks that finally, the charade is over and that she will be revealed for the fraud she is. She is glad, in the end, to disband the Inquisition. It was getting too big, too frightening, and something she was not proud of. She feels like a failure, honestly. Losing her arm also does not help, as her fighting style depends on it, and now she cannot even write – the only thing that brought her comfort for so many years. She feels that in some way she’s been stripped of her identity and made into something she doesn’t recognize.

Solas betraying her was the worst thing. He honestly acted as her mentor, because he was the only one that knew something about the Anchor and how to control it. Taashath feels everything spiralled after he left. When she finds out that not only is he an Ancient Elven God, he is responsible for everything that happened, and what he is about to do will destroy the world, she just really doesn’t know how to cope with it. She is broken for a while. But, like always, she picks herself back up out of sheer willpower. She wants to save her friend, even if it means protecting him from himsef. It’s the only thing giving her purpose, now, the only thing she will not allow herself to fail at.

Use three words to describe your Inquisitor at the end of the game, and explain why they are appropriate. (If there are any that are still the same from the beginning of the game, explain why they are still appropriate DESPITE the game’s events.)

Authoritative – Taashath, through her knowledge of history and nobility, through being a good strategist, learns to use her voice and make herself heard, learns to make decisions and take control of the situation, and to live with the consequences of what she does. She’s also less afraid of not appearing perfect in front of the nobility – she knows who she is, and nothing will change that.

Paranoid/Insecure – She makes decisions. She lives with the consequences. But each day, those decisions and their repercussions weigh more and more on her, with the death count rising, always. She doubts herself, she is afraid she is not suited for the role and that she should pass it down to someone else instead. But she doesn’t do it, because she is also afraid of what someone else might do with the power of the Inquisition. In the end, it was never its fate to last, and she knew that.

Dedicated – Despite her doubts, her fears, Taashath simply cannot give up. She will do anything it takes to find Solas, to make him see that this world is worth keeping, and to save him from himself – and the people of Thedas from him. It’s her only goal, and she puts everything she has in herself towards it. She will act, even if it means more decisions, and more weight on her shoulders. She can take it.

Life Before the Conclave

What is their combat skill level before the events of the game? Are they already skilled fighters, or can they barely hold their weapon of choice properly?

Taashath’s father was a Karasten, well trained in the way of fighting. He always believed that his daughter should be able to protect herself, given their nomadic lifestyle, and trained her with sticks first and real swords later from a very young age. She is quick and agile, nimble for someone of her stature and the weapons she wields. She’s an excellent fighter, despite it being something that she does only to defend herself and not because she actually enjoys it.

How well do they improve after becoming the Herald/Inquisitor?

With The Iron Bull’s help, Taashaths learns quite a few tricks. Not just that, but he teaches her how to make training something to actually relax with, something she can do to wind down and keep her body and mind sharp. She does indeed come to enjoy sparring with him, Cassandra and Blackwall (as the other soldiers will not fight her). Losing her arm, her fighting hand, is absolutely the worst. If all else fails, now she cannot even fight. Of course, after Dagna makes her a very flexible prosthetic, she starts training again – as if she had never held a weapon before. She’s not at the level she used to be, but she’s still quite the fighter.

Does the Inquisitor have family they left behind? Friends?

She learns this during her time in the Inquisition, as for a long while she thought they were dead, but her mother and father are still alive and well. Moreover, she’s got a younger sister and brother. Her ex-partner, a Tal-Vashoth mage, also asks for her help in the Emerald Graves and helps the Inquisition as an agent. Taashath’s mother, Asala, was a Tamassran under the Qun. She taught Taashath everything she knows and, when she came out to them as a child, Asala wasted no time in making Taashath comfortable and teaching her about herb mixtures to help her growth. Taashath’s father, Berestaar, was a Karasten. He often had more trouble than Asala in expressing his feelings and emotions, and could appear like a distant father, but he always loved and cared for her daughter and wanted nothing but the best for them.

Hissera is Taashath’s younger sister, a little spitfire that causes trouble wherever she goes.

Finally, Kost is Hissera’s twin. He’s not as restless as she is, and is also a mage.

Hissra was Taashath’s first love, and they lost each other for a couple years before the events of Inquisition. After Taash helps her personally in the Emerald Graves, Hissra joins the Inquisition as an Agent until its disbandment out of loyalty and gratitude to Taashath.

How do they feel about being separated from them?

It’s very complicated. When she was young, Taashath resented having to always be on the run. She hated that they had nowhere to stay, she hated the way people looked at her parents – her. She hated that they did not speak the King’s Tongue well, she hated that they didn’t seem to make an effort to at least appear less threatening. When she was fifteen, before her mother found out she was pregnant again, she ran away and never looked back. She felt that, on her own, she had more chances of being able to build a life for herself in human society – and she was wrong. By the time of Inquisition, she is very ashamed of what she did, the words she said to them, and wishes she could take it all back. She fears they might be dead. She reveals this to Josephine one evening, who in turn informs Leliana and asks her to look into it as a personal favour. They reach Skyhold, and it’s a very emotional reunion. Now she knows she won’t let go of them ever, and bought a house for them to stay in Antiva, near where she and Josephine live.

What is the most important/influential moment of their life before the Conclave?

There are a couple, at least. Running away from her parents was one such moment. Her breakup with Hissra was another. But most definitely her most defining moment was when she got turned away from the University of Orlais. Even after all those years on the road, and having to work as a mercenary to gather the coin because no one would hire qunari for anything else, she still hoped she could make it. She was genuinely convinced that if she argued her points well, they would admit her. After all, the University was the only place elves were allowed to study in, so how far of a stretch could it have been to allow a qunari in as well? It was the moment she gave up on her dream, forever, and resigned herself to a life of mercenary work just to get by.

Why were they sent to the Conclave?

It was just another job with the Valo-Kas. Go there and look threatening, make sure no one started anything. She knew the importance of the Conclave and was interested in seeing its outcome. Still, she knew nothing would personally change in her life. Or at least, she thought so.

PART TWO: MAIN PLOT REACTIONS/CHOICES

THE WRATH OF HEAVEN/THE THREAT REMAINS

How does the Inquisitor react to the Anchor and the idea of closing the Breach–do they want to do the right thing, are they only along because they are a prisoner, or something else?

Taashath is thoroughly freaked out the entirety of the prologue, even if she tries hard not to show it. She knows she didn’t do anything, but she can’t remember what happened. She’s surrounded by angry humans who blame her for the death of their religious head figure, and she knows how much humans hate and fear qunari. She wants to do the right thing and accepts anyway, but she honestly thinks that she won’t survive the ordeal – Anchor or no.

Do they take the mountain pass with the scouts to the Temple, or do they charge with the soldiers?

The mountain pass was without a doubt the safest and smartest choice – charging aimlessly to fight a force she does not yet know is not her style at all.

How does the Inquisitor react to being called the Herald of Andraste?

She doesn't like it, and asks everyone not to call her that. Not only because she does not believe she’s the chosen of Andraste or the Maker, but because she’s afraid of what will happen when other people realize she’s neither of those things.

Do they believe it themselves?

Absolutely not. Taashath is an atheist, and she believes Andraste was just a very powerful mage who communed with a spirit. She holds no illusions of being the chosen of any God.

How does the Inquisitor react to Chancellor Roderick’s presence and the threat of the Chantry?

Taashath does not like him, and definitely does not like the way he calls for her beheading every two seconds – but he’s nothing new. She knows how much power the Chantry and its lackeys hold, so she can only hope that he won’t bother her too much.

Does the Inquisitor decide to approach the mages or the Templars?

Taashath does not want to be affiliated with the Chantry in any way. However, she’s working for an organization that is technically under its banner. Still, she chooses the mages because she figures they can help more with this magic rather than following Cullen’s conjectures.

IN HUSHED WHISPERS

How does the Inquisitor feel about mages and about recruiting them?

She has a deep respect for magic and mages, and is a supporter of their cause. She goes to the mage without seconds thoughts because she genuinely feels they are the only way to help, and if she can help them in return, she will do anything in her power to do so. When she finds out they basically sold themselves into slavery she’s perplexed as to exactly why they would do that – but she also sees that they thought this was the only way they could escape the Chantry. This just further convinces her that she wants to help them and their cause.

How does the Inquisitor react to the idea of allying with Tevinter to gain the mages’ support?

Very practically. She is not allying herself with Tevinter, she is helping the mages and making sure they are not going to be slaves in a foreign land.

How do they react to being thrown a year into the future? Do they believe they can get back? Are they focused on their goal, gathering information? Or are they just freaking out?

Taashath, as usual, is very calm on the surface. She is very freaked out about the whole situation and what she sees, but she’s also very fascinated by how this was achieved. Having Dorian with her also helps, as even if she initially did not trust him, he quickly proves to be a valuable ally. Shared trauma is the quickest way to make friends, apparently. What really disturbs her is seeing how her companions have suffered, and seeing them die for her does a number on her. Her top priority after that becomes making sure there are the least number of casualties possible.

Did they ally with the mages or conscript them? Why?

She allies with them. She’s not about to force people to help her, and she doesn’t want the mages to go from one prison to another. She figures that the only way the Inquisition will survive is if it makes allies rather than enemies, as it already has quite a few of those, and conscripting people is not the best way to make lasting friendships.

What is the Inquisitor’s relationship with Fiona?

She is confused at first by Fiona’s reasoning, but she does not blame her more than what she feels is her right because Taashath is neither a mage nor an elf – there is clearly nuance there that she is lacking the life experiences to fully get. However, as they spend more time together in service of the Inquisition, she becomes fascinated with her stories and her life, and often comes to her for counsel.

IN YOUR HEART SHALL BURN

Does the Inquisitor help Harriet and save all possible citizens of Haven? Why?

Of course! She saved everyone, and was willing to die herself to see the innocent people of Haven survive. Even if she did not like some of them, they had all given themselves to a cause and she is a firm believer that even the most “insignificant” of people has value. Everyone deserves to live, and she makes sure everyone makes it to the Chantry safe and sound.

How does the Inquisitor feel about being a distraction for Corypheus while Haven flees? Are they resigned to their fate? Resentful? Determined to defeat the enemy/survive?

In a way, she figured she would not survive Haven. She is afraid, and while she feels like shaking in fear, she knows she cannot show any weakness at this moment. She is resigned to her fate, and she only hopes the Inquisition will be able to defeat Corypheus. They have Cassandra to lead them, after all. She has closed the Breach, her duty is done, and although she is not ready, she wants to give everyone a chance.

Does the encounter with Corypheus change their opinion of being Herald? Does it make them believe they are the Herald, lose faith, or affirm to their previous belief?

Nah, it doesn’t. It just makes her believe that she has to stop him at all costs - although she’s fascinated by what he said about the Black City.

How do they react to Solas telling them the orb is elvhen?

She’s so fascinated, and asks tons of questions. She wants to know more about it. She agrees nobody else should know the orb is elven in origin because she fears the reaction of the humans in the organization, and what it might mean for the elves working for it.

How do they feel about being chosen for Inquisitor?

It’s the first time in the game she actually shows some emotion – mostly, bewilderment. She can’t believe a bunch of humans are making them her leader, and she doubts anyone will follow her. She thinks someone like Cassandra is more suited to leading the Inquisition, and gets a bit teary-eyed when she sees the outpouring love and support the people she helped save show her. She enjoys it - initially.

What do they say are the principle foundations for the Inquisition?

Uncovering the truth, protecting the people, defending the freedom of the people of Thedas – of all its people, not just humans.

FROM THE ASHES

How does the Inquisitor react to Hawke’s presence?

Taashath has read the Tale of the Champion quite a few times, and is fascinated by meeting the Champion herself. She asks lots of questions, and she is surprised to see how mellow and quiet Hawke seems to be – so different from what Varric had written in his book.

Does the Inquisitor side with Varric or Cassandra during their fight?

Varric. He is not responsible for what happened at the Conclave, and she does not fault him for not trusting Cassandra.

How well do they get along with Hawke? Do they agree with Hawke’s decisions?

They get along pretty well. They find much in terms of common ground and Taashath values Marian’s help a lot. Taashath doesn’t know what she would have done in Hawke’s place, so she does not judge her. Marian has had many dealings with qunari of all backgrounds, so seeing Taashath does not really phase her.

HERE LIES THE ABYSS

Who is the Warden contact?

In-game? Stroud. In my personal canon? My own Hero of Ferelden. After getting news from Varric of who is responsible for the Breach, Marian contacts Anthra for help, and Anthra interrupts her search for a cure (close to bearing fruit) because she believes Corypheus is the Wardens’ responsibility. Her wife Everelle follows in tow, and they’re joined by their daughter Fen’na shortly afterwards.

How does the Inquisitor get along with them?

With Stroud, she doesn’t form much of an opinion. He keeps to himself and gives her directions and information, and so she does the same. With Anthra, she is very fascinated by her and asks her tons of questions. She’s read the Chronicles of the Fifth Blight a thousand times already, but she doesn’t pass any chances to inquire about something with the Hero of Ferelden herself. She respects her, admires her, and admires her prowess in combat.

How do they react to finding out the Wardens are being used by Corypheus?

It went against everything she knew about the Wardens. Honourable warriors dedicated to defeating the darkspawn, allying themselves with a powerful one? She did not understand, and was pretty shaken after discovering it.

How does the Inquisitor react to being in the Fade?

Extremely enthusiastic, despite the circumstances. She takes notes of everything she sees, until it becomes a little too freaky for her liking. She never expected to see the Fade in person.

Do they ever believe the spirit is actually of Divine Justinia?

For a brief moment, yes. And for a second, she started freaking out that if the spirit was truly Divine Justinia, then maybe she was really the Herald and all that other nonsense. She was thoroughly pleased to find out it was all as she believed initially - no higher power to speak of.

How do they react to the revelation regarding the Wardens’ involvement in the Conclave attack?

Disturbed. She had hoped they had no part in what happened at the Conclave, purely out of the respect she feels for the Order, but seeing her memories made it impossible to keep staying in denial.

Do they agree with Hawke or the Warden more?

In-game? Neither. Stroud’s “how dare you judge us” feels like he’s trying to avoid any kind of responsibility, while Marian would never blame what happened on the use of blood magic. In canon? Marian feels pity for how the Wardens were tricked. At the same time, Anthra can’t believe the Order let itself be fooled and forced into slavery by darkspawn. There is nothing to agree with, they all feel it’s a shitty situation.

How do they respond to Hawke’s and the Warden’s fight?

In canon, no fights happen, while in the game, she tries to make Stroud and Hawke realize that fighting while they are held hostage by a Nightmare full of demons is probably not the best decision.

How do they react to learning it was the Divine behind them in the Fade, not Andraste?

She feels relieved that it was not Andraste, sad for the Divine’s death, guilty for failing to help her.

What would the Nightmare Demon have said to rattle the Inquisitor?

“Try as you might, you won’t be able to hide forever. One day, they will all see what you really are. And I will be waiting.”

What is on the Inquisitor’s tombstone (what is their greatest fear)?

“Lost herself.”

Who does the Inquisitor leave behind in the Fade? Why do they choose to do so?

Both in-game and in canon it’s not actually Taashath’s decision, but I’ll explain the canon version: Anthra was ready to give herself for the cause, believing that Corypheus is the Wardens’ responsibility. However, Hawke believes otherwise. She failed to kill Corypheus, so in a way, she feels it’s her fault this all happened. She pushes Taashath and Anthra away with magic and forces them out of the rift before it closes. It’s her responsibility. She will pay the price.

Does the Inquisitor decide to exile the Wardens or have them fight alongside the Inquisition? What is their reasoning behind the decision?

Despite their mistakes, despite the revelation that the Wardens are not as infallible as she thought they were, she is not so stupid as to exile them. Two Old Gods still lie in the Deep Roads waiting to be awakened by the darkspawn, and when that time comes, the Grey Wardens will once again need to save Thedas.

WICKED EYES AND WICKED HEARTS

What is their opinion on attending the ball in the first place? Do they think it’s a waste of time, a necessary duty, or something exciting?

It’s a necessary duty, but one she dreads. She dreads appearing in front of the same nobles and scholars who regularly mock her and call her ox, and she fears she will make a blunder and ruin the Inquisition’s reputation.

Do the companions/advisors believe the Inquisitor will do well at the palace, or is there a fear they’ll be kicked out within five minutes?

Everyone fears the outcome of the evening because they are attempting to stop a murder. But while no one is afraid Taashath will bring shame to the Inquisition, they do have to sit down with her and try to get her to be more warm and friendly - teach her to recognize some of the nobles. Vivienne especially helps in this situation, as she’s familiar with having to appear perfect in front of a group of people ready to eat her alive.

How does the Inquisitor actually fare? Are they the belle of the ball, or do they barely scrape by?

Taashath does incredibly well. It’s like the nobles are at her fingertips, she manoeuvres and manipulates them all. She finds the Game quite delightful, and discovers herself a good player.

Does the Inquisitor gather blackmail information for Leliana? Gather caprice coins and stone halla? Find the Red Jenny caches?

If there was a chance, yes, but she didn’t go out of her way to find stuff that was not directly related to the mission at hand – save the blackmail for Leliana. That was valuable and essential information that would have helped them even after the evening at the palace was over.

Does the Inquisitor fight Grand Duchess Florianne, or expose her?

She exposes her. Taashath fears that a divided Orlais will be worse for the balance of Thedas than Corypheus might be, and she does what she can to make sure there is someone to rule it.

Who does the Inquisitor support for Orlesian rule?

She forces Celene, Gaspard and Briala into a truce. She holds no love either for the Empress nor for Gaspard, and wishes to see Briala and her people thrive. Still, both the Empress and Gaspard have numerous allies and enemies that balance each other out, and her only interest was a united Orlais for what was to come.

She also, not so very subtly, enjoyed the humans having to bow to her demands, for once.

WHAT PRIDE HAD WROUGHT

How does the Inquisitor get along with Morrigan?

She asks her questions, but she is wary. Morrigan seems more interested in the power she can find in the Temple of Mythal rather than stopping Corypheus, and this concerns her. She also sees how her Dalish ambassador and her clash, and she can’t help but take Shaevra’s side.

Does the Inquisitor take the Pilgrim’s Path, or fight their way through?

She follows the Pilgrim’s Path. She takes in as much of the Temple of Mythal as she can, having never had the chance to be so close to Ancient Elven culture. She wants to see everything for herself.

Does the Inquisitor ally with Abelas and the elven sentinels?

Of course. If she could, she would ask them tons of questions, and would love to hear their stories. She is very frustrated that there’s just no time to do that, and she has no wish of fighting them.

Does the Inquisitor weaken Samson’s armour before fighting him?

Yes. Weakening an enemy’s allies is the first thing she takes care of.

Who drinks from the Well of Sorrows? What is the reasoning behind the choice?

In-game, Taashath takes the knowledge of the Well for herself. Ancient history? Culture? There was not a chance she was giving that up. One of the only selfish choices she made during the game, as she knew Morrigan would benefit from it more. In canon? My own Lavellan, Shaevra, drank from the Well, as Taashath would never take that away from her. It’s her people, her culture, and she finds Morrigan’s comments terribly out of place, and a confirmation that she was more interested in the power of the Temple rather than helping fight Corypheus.

THE FINAL PIECE

If the Inquisitor drank from the Well, how do they react to finding out they are now a servant of Flemeth/Mythal?

She regrets it a bit, because she realizes she didn’t think about the consequences - and she always thinks of the consequences. It surprises her to find out Mythal is in a human body, but she’s still fascinated by everything that’s happening.

Shaerva is not bothered by being a servant of one of her gods per se, but again, she is surprised first and angry later that Mythal chose a human vessel. She’s angry with Mythal, because she could have helped them all those years, and she didn’t. She doesn’t know what to make of it.

DOOM UPON ALL THE WORLD

How does the Inquisitor feel about facing Corypheus for the last time? Do they feel confident? Do they believe they will survive the encounter? How do they cope with the possibility of failure?

Honestly, Taashath believes that this final confrontation will be the last. The Breach, again? Corypheus and his dragon? This has to be it, she thinks. Her biggest regret is not having had enough time for her family, but at least she knows she’s done all she can.

Who becomes the next Divine? Is the Inquisitor in support of the decision?

This is actually the hardest decision Taash had to make - who to support. She, of course, realizes that the Divine being someone who used to work for the Inquisition is extrmely important and valuable. Her heart says Leliana, because of her outspoken support of nonhumans and mages. Vivienne also was a candidate in her mind, and talking with her personal apprentice, Sefridi, she was swayed to her side. It is only after Anthra herself gives her opinion that Taashath finally comes to the decision that Leliana is the best suited to become Divine.

How do they react to Solas’ disappearance?

Confused, sad. She always came to him not just to have stories told, or to have him walk her through the Fade, but also when she had doubts, second thoughts, when it came to the Anchor. They spent a lot of time together, and she deeply respected him. He was very much her mentor. She misses their ritual of greeting the morning on the roofs of Skyhold more than anything.

What does the Inquisitor decide to do after Corypheus is defeated? How do they focus the Inquisition?

There are still rifts out there that need to be closed, and the Inquisition’s work is not done. Corypheus’s mess is not entirely dealt with, so she doesn’t feel like there is any other path for her aside from continuing to lead the Inquisition. She wants them to keep the peace and protect the people of Thedas, though she realizes the organization is getting too big and slipping out of her control. After the events of Trespasser, Taashath dedicates herself to finding and stopping Solas, and try to save him from himself and make him realize this is a world worth preserving.

PART THREE: SIDE QUESTS/WAR TABLE

SIT IN JUDGMENT:

How does the Inquisitor generally judge prisoners?

If there is a way for her to make use of her enemies so that they bolster the Inquisition’s forces, that is what she will do.

What are the specific judgments passed to prisoners in-game?

Gereon Alexius (If Mages Recruited): Execution/Imprisonment/Work With Mages/Made Tranquil/Research Magic

She has him researching magic, especially the time magic he was able to use in Redcliffe.

Florianne’s Remains (If Confronted and not killed): Encloisterment/Recruitment/Farm Work/Exile/Jester

Recruited her. No way she’s wasting that potential.

Magister Livius Erimond: Imprisonment/Execution/Made Tranquil/Remand to Grey Wardens

She sends him to the Grey Wardens, as she is sure they will punish him appropriately.

Ser Ruth: Divine Forgiveness/Humiliation/Imprisonment/Refuse Judgment/Exile with Wardens/Exile to Deep Roads

Refused to judge her.

Captain Thom Rainer: Pardon/Give to Wardens/Servitude

She gives him to the Grey Wardens – she can see he regrets what he’s done and willing to make amends, so she sends him where he was initially supposed to go anyway.

Samson (If Mages Recruited): Serve Inquisition/Give to Dagna/Remand to Kirkwall/Exile/Imprisonment

He serves the Inquisition.

Chief Movran the Under: Banish/Public Display/Arm and Exile to Tevinter/Assign to Abernache

Arms and exiles him to Tevinter.

Mayor Gregory Dedrick: Give to Grey Wardens/Exile/Death/Imprison in Fereldan

She has Ferelden authorities deal with him, as even though the crimes pertain to the Blight, she still feels it’s not her place to make that call.

Crassius Servis: Imprisonment/Returned to Corypheus/Recruited (Informant)/Recruited (Smuggler)

Recruits him as an informant.

Mistress Poulin: Rebuild Town/Released/Put to Work/Execution/Money Confiscated for Trevelyan

She had Poulin use her own funds to rebuild the town.

WAR TABLE

Does your Inquisitor generally use Force, Secrets, or Connections to complete War Table Operations? Why?

She rarely, if ever, uses Cullen’s forces. Only when it comes to something military-related does she call on him, otherwise all the work goes to Leliana and Josephine’s agents.

What does the Inquisitor usually spend Inquisition Perks on?

Secrets. Taashath knows that, to use the Inquisition to its fullest potential, she has to know everyone and everything about Thedas.

FETCH/GATHERING QUESTS

Does the Inquisitor take time to collect the shards? Do they complete the Temple of Pride? Why or why not?

It’s secret knowledge – of course she’s not letting that slip out of her hands. She is, however, horrified to find out how the oculara are created.

Does the Inquisitor complete the Astrariums? Why or why not?

She loved testing her knowledge of the stars and enjoyed completing the puzzles – always refusing any help.

Does the Inquisitor take time to complete side quests/recruit agents? Why or why not?

Unless she was on a mission that required to make haste, Taashath always takes the time to help people in need and spread the word of the good work the Inquisition does. As for agents, she recruits as much as she can, and never turns down help or a chance to gain more influence.

PART FOUR: RELATIONSHIPS/COMPANION QUESTS

GENERAL

Who does the Inquisitor prefer to have in their party? Why?

Cole, Solas and Dorian/Vivienne. They take turns. Cole is a spirit in a very unique predicament, Solas knows much about magic and the Fade, and Dorian is her bestie. She also really loves Vivienne’s company.

Which advisor is the Inquisitor closest to, if any?

Josephine. She helps Taashath a great deal adjusting in Haven and then in Skyhold, and she feels really drawn to her. She also really loves hearing about her time in Antiva and Orlais, but she comes to Leliana when she has doubts about what she’s doing or the Inquisition itself.

Who does the Inquisitor most often turn to for advice?

Solas, mostly. They have this ritual where they will greet the morning, relaxing their bodies, stretching them, it helps her relax a lot and start the morning with a clear mindset. She also finds venting to Dorian very helpful, and the two grow very close.

Who is the one the Inquisitor hangs out with the most in their free time?

Dorian, absolutely. They’re both bookworms and spend their time talking about what new things they’re studying, their favourite scholars and the like. He tries to get her to loosen up a bit, and although met with some initial resistance, the two grow very fond of each other.

Who would be the one the Inquisitor tells their deepest, darkest secrets to?

Cole already knows them all, and she knows it. Her deepest and darkest secrets? Leliana, the only one who will treasure them carefully.

Are there any companions the Inquisitor wishes they were closer to? If so, which ones?

Sera. Taashath feels that winding down with Sera is the best time she has in the Inquisition, but her duties always make it so she can spend little time with her, and she wishes she could be more like the elf - wild and carefree. However, after some time, they find solace in each other and help each other deal with their issues regarding their own heritages.

LELIANA

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Leliana?

She’s the voice of reason compared to Cassandra, and she trusts her from the beginning, purely because she’s level-headed despite what is happening.

Does the impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

Taashath always trusts Leliana and considers her a powerful and valuable ally. However, during the events of Trespasser she grows frustrated with the liberties Leliana takes, and her failures as well.

What does Leliana think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Leliana sees Taashath as a wonderful woman. Knowledgeable, well versed in the fighting arts and a diplomat to heart. Honestly, Leliana couldn’t have wished for a better Inquisitor.

Does the Inquisitor help Leliana find the Divine’s last message for her in Val Royeaux?

Of course she does. Having her advisors be at peace and entirely focused on her work is a top priority.

If so, do they “soften” Leliana or confirm her “hardened” nature?

Leliana doesn’t need Taashath to tell her who she is. She only tries to remind her that there can be space for a gentle heart even when making the toughest decisions.

Does the Inquisitor support the idea of Leliana being Divine?

She swings back and forth between her and Vivienne until she finally decides to support her. The Chantry needs radical change, and Leliana will bring just that. She loves how outspoken she is in favor of non-humans and mages, and she knows she will be a friend of the Inquisition. It’s an all around win for everyone, she believes.

CULLEN

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Cullen?

He’s angry, he’s got a sword, he’s giving her the stink eye. She doesn’t like him.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

Not really. She’s apathetic towards him at best, or wishes they could find a better replacement for him, but the soldiers seem to like him, and she only wants the Inquisition to be united.

What does Cullen think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Cullen knows full well the Inquisitor doesn’t even think him necessary to the operations, and he tries to make her see things differently. When she challenges him on his views and his methods, he realizes he only buried his bigoted views under the false pretence of having “gotten over it”.

Does the Inquisitor play the chess game with Cullen? Do they let him win, play fair, or cheat?

She doesn’t really like spending time with Cullen outside of work, so no.

Does the Inquisitor convince Cullen to stay off lyrium, or tell him to start taking it again?

She’s not gonna have him keep taking lyrium – it’s going to lead to madness eventually, and she urges him to push through it despite the pain. Genuinely, it’s when she feels sympathy for him. What he goes through cannot be easy, and even though she doesn’t like him and him being free of lyrium addiction would help the Inquisition, it’s mostly for his own good that she pushes him to power through it.

Does the Inquisitor assist Cullen in finding Samson’s base?

Yes. She is disgusted by him calling Maddox “Samson’s Tranquil” like he is some sort of pet, but in the end the only thing she cares about is weakening Corypheus’s allies.

JOSEPHINE

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Josephine?

Taashath thinks Josephine is lovely, and appreciates her efforts to make her feel comfortable. In her opinion, Josie is also a very beautiful, striking woman.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

She thinks Josephine is, along with Leliana, the most important asset to the Inquisition. Her knowledge and network of contacts is vital and she cherishes having such a prepared and professional woman by her side.

What does Josephine think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Josephine is initially nervous about Taashath’s apparent stoic nature, but eventually learns to recognize the subtle tells of the qunari’s feelings, learns to read them, and becomes her confidante. She greatly appreciates Taashath’s interest in politics and eagerness to help.

Does the Inquisitor initiate a romance with Josephine?

Yes. To be honest, in the beginning, Taashath went to her to vent and relax. She would compliment her constantly in what could be considered flirtatious comments, but to her she was only admiring the woman she was speaking to. It didn’t even occur to her that she was developing feelings for Josephine, as she would never assume Josephine would waste her time with her, and it is only when Leliana gives her “the talk” that she’s forced to think about her feelings and realizes just how much she cares for her.

What is it like? Why are they attracted to each other?

Taashath is interested in Josephine’s work and stories, and she enjoys her quiet company. Josephine appreciates Taashath’s work ethics and driven mind. It’s all professional at first… until it isn’t.

Does the Inquisitor find Josephine an example of her old family crest?

Yes. Taashath takes any chance she has to make Josephine happy, and spends a great deal of time finding that antiquity – she loves collecting old wine bottles as well, and thus she knows where and who to look for when it comes to trinket-hunters.

Does the Inquisitor duel Lord Otranto for Josephine’s affections? Do they confess their love to Josephine when she intervenes, or allow Otranto to marry Josephine?

Initially, she wasn’t going to. If Josephine said they were done, Taashath was not going to force anything on her. However, this caused her a great deal of suffering. She was a mess, and this to her was just reaffirmation that no one would ever love her the way she loved them. She got blind drunk and collapsed on the sofa in her chambers. Ironically, it was Hissra – her previous partner – who found her in that condition and made her realize she had to fight for Josephine. Her yelling “because I love you!” in the middle of the square was probably the most emotional she’s been, and has allowed herself to be, in quite a bit. She poured her heart out for Josephine in that moment, and to have her love reciprocated was… more than she could have ever hoped for.

They get married sometime before Trespasser.

Does the Inquisitor talk to Josephine about her work to help her relieve stress?

Yes. They go on and on about it, and Taashath tries to give helpful advice, or just offer an understanding ear.

Do they enjoy it? Does it continue to occur?

Oh, yes. It becomes a regular occurrence, so much so that Josephine is always ready with wine and appetizers for Taashath’s visit. Yes, those are dates. No, they don’t realize it for quite a while. Everybody else knows but them.

Does the Inquisitor help Josephine reinstate her family’s trade in Orlais?

Of course!

If yes, do they kill the agent from the House of Repose?

No. The agent came to speak, and so did she.

Do they decide to take Josephine’s route of nullifying the contract, or Leliana’s?

Taashath would prefer doing what Leliana suggests because it’s fast and easy, but ultimately chooses to follow Josephine’s route and elevate the Du Paraquettes. Having nobles owe you favours is convenient.

CASSANDRA

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Cassandra?

She is mostly afraid of her, because she understands she’s in a position of power and is very, very angry at her for something she didn’t do. Does not bode well.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

They become good work colleagues after the events of the Temple, and sometimes they share book recommendations and advice. However, Taashath does not like how Cassandra pushes for her to believe in the Maker, and her general lack of tact when it comes to asking about Taashath herself prevents them from becoming fully friends, although there is much respect between the two..

What does Cassandra think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Cassandra is surprised by Taashath’s prowess as a strategist and warrior, and is content with her being Inquisitor, although she disagrees with some of her choices.

Does the Inquisitor initiate a romance with Cassandra?

Nah. Taashath likes Cassandra well enough, but she regards her more as a colleague rather than a potential partner.

Does the Inquisitor find out about Cassandra’s “guilty pleasure?” If so, do they convince Varric to make the next chapter of Swords and Shields for her?

Yes. She finds it all amusing, really. She’s read Sword & Shield herself, and finds it very shallow – not to the level of poetry books that she usually reads. However, she sees how much Cassandra likes it, and sees no harm in nudging Varric towards finishing another chapter.

Does the Inquisitor help Cassandra track down hunt down criminals left unchecked by the Seekers’ absence?

Yes. She has Leliana check their backgrounds herself first, but she helps her in the end.

Does the Inquisitor go with Cassandra to Caer Oswin to find the missing Seekers?

Yes. She sees how important it is for Cassandra, and wants her at peace.

If so, does the Inquisitor support Cassandra’s idea to rebuild the Seekers, or do they discourage her from doing so?

Taashath knows what the Seekers mean to Cassandra, and she sees she’s horrified by the secrets they kept and wants to do better by them- Plus, she believes Cassandra is the perfect fit to guide them, so she lets her go. Her hope is that the Seekers of Truth will now be worthy of their name.

Does the Inquisitor support the idea of Cassandra being Divine?

Nah. Cassandra is not suited to deal with nobles, or politics. She is a firm believer, sure, but that alone is not enough. She would keep the peace at the cost of people’s lives – as much as Taashath’s respects her, she does not trust her with the Sunburst Throne.

VARRIC

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Varric?

She doesn’t ever really know how to respond to his jokes, but he’s an accomplished writer and a good person at heart, and she sees that. For her, it’s good enough.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

Varric’s charisma gets to her, too, and she often drinks with him. They share stories and writing tips, and after Taashath has him read some of her own writing, he tries to hook her up with someone who might publish her poems under a pen name, successfully. Sometimes, occasionally, she vents to him, but she deals with things that are so far beyond a normal person’s understanding that he rarely knows what to say, so she tries not to make him uncomfortable. Like Dorian, he tries to get her to loosen up, but it’s actually because of their shared passion of writing that they grow fond of each other and become good friends.

What does Varric think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Varric’s dealings with the qunari in the past have left him wary of the people, but he also sees Taashath is genuinely trying to do what’s best. He only hopes things will turn out better than they did with Hawke, but Taashath seems better suited to deal with the situations thrown at her than Marian was.

If Varric could give the Inquisitor a nickname, what would it be?

Red. Her red eyes are the first thing he noticed about her, not to mention her red hair and coppery skin, and how she dresses. Red, to describe her, is the first thing that comes to mind.

Does the Inquisitor find and destroy the Red Lyrium sources across Thedas after learning about them from Varric?

Absolutely. It’s vital to her in destroying Corypheus, not doing so would be irresponsible.

Does the Inquisitor help Varric and Bianca find the thaig inside Valammar?

Yes.

Does the Inquisitor blame Bianca for what happened?

Yes. She loves learning more, and knowing more, and figuring out stuff. But lying? Putting people in danger? Refusing to take responsibility? That does not sit right with her.

SOLAS

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Solas?

She's' very uncomfortable with him grabbing her and yanking her arm, but she quickly comes to trust him - especially once she finds out he kept her alive while she was unconscious, and thanks him for his help.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

She immediately trusts him with her doubts regarding the Anchor, and often comes to him for advice. She loves walking with him through the Fade, she loves listening to his stories, they have their own little ritual in the morning. She considers him her mentor.

What does Solas think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

He is… surprised. He knows what she really is, where she comes from, what she comes from, and expects her to be nothing but a savage who will not understand the power she holds in her hand. Instead, Taashath reveals herself to be level-headed, reasonable, eager to learn, and interested in everything he has to say. Maybe he misjudged her people.

Does the Inquisitor help Solas find and activate elvhen artefacts to strengthen the Veil?

Yes. It’s part of the Inquisition’s job to deal with the Veil now, only natural that she would.

Does the Inquisitor help Solas rescue his friend in the Exalted Plains?

Of course. She sees how distressed he is, and she only wants to help him.

Does the Inquisitor choose to destroy the summoning stones or fight the Pride Demon?

They’re there to help Solas’s friend, even if the friend has been corrupted. Solas will deal with it when everything is over.

Does the Inquisitor let Solas kill the mages or do they stop him?

She stops him. It was all a mistake, one that was not supposed to happen, she doesn’t want him killing mages who didn’t understand what they were doing. Let them live, and learn from their experience.

How does the Inquisitor react to finding out Solas is Fen’harel?

It’s all a whirlwind of emotions. Some things make sense, others are completely upside down. That she was spending her time with an Ancient Elven God all this time, when she didn't believe in any higher power, shook her to her core.

Does the Inquisitor choose to look for Solas after he disappears? Why or why not?

Of course! She needs to know more, and knows that – deep down – Solas wants to be stopped. And she will.

SERA

Is Sera recruited?

Definitely. A network of spies that uses people no one ever expects to do this kind of work is exactly what Taashath needed.

If she is, does she ever leave the Inquisition, and why?

Absolutely not. Taashath values Sera’s network greatly, and she clearly wants to be with the Inquisition. Why turn down her help, when she gives it freely?

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Sera?

Amused. She doesn’t really know what to make of Sera, but her skill with a bow and her quick-witted nature are a breath of fresh air for her.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

They have a complicated relationship. Taashath sees a lot of herself in Sera, and not in the best sense. The way she looks down upon her own heritage, the way she shuts down when something becomes too overwhelming – it’s like seeing a younger version of herself. Taashath tries to help Sera in coming to terms with her own “elfyness”, and Sera ends up doing the same for her. They help each other like that.

What does Sera think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Sera finds Taashath to be a beautiful woman, and she’s captivated by her. Helps her relax and keep her eyes looking towards the little people. Sera is always watchful for the moment Taashath becomes like the nobles she hates - and yet this never happens. Sera and Taashath remain good friends even after the end of the main game. She has her loyalty.

Does the Inquisitor initiate a romance with Sera?

No. Taashath finds Sera to be too young for her.

Does the Inquisitor complete the Red Jenny War Table missions?

Yes. After all, that’s why she recruited Sera in the first place.

Does the Inquisitor agree to send a presence to Verchiel for Sera?

Yes. She trusts and values Sera’s input, despite what others might say.

How does the Inquisitor deal with Lord Harmond? (Do they ally with him, force him to work for the Inquisition, let him leave, or let Sera kill him?)

Normally, Taashath tries to find a way so that her enemies can become her allies. However, after seeing how Harmond treats people, and seeing how distressed Sera was, she allows her to kill him. People like him would bring no good to the Inquisition, anyway.

VIVIENNE

Is Vivienne recruited?

Yes. Taashath is aware of who the Madame de Fer is, and is very intrigued by her invite.

If she is, does she ever leave the Inquisition, and why?

No. Taashath deeply values Vivienne as an ally and friend.

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Vivienne?

She’s… almost enchanted. The way she handled the confrontation with the noble, the way she got straight to business immediately. Everything from the way she was dressed to the way she acted told Taashath this was someone to keep close. Maybe she even flirted a little bit with her, with no hopes of achieving anything, of course. She’s not that deluded.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

Taashath wished Vivienne’s opinions on the Circle were somewhat different, although she still understood where she was coming from. But she comes to respect and regard Vivienne as a dear friend, and often came to her for advice or to vent. Vivienne was always willing to help, and to offer a listening ear. They enjoyed quiet evenings together, discussing politics and drinking fine wine.

What does Vivienne think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

At first, she saw Taashath as a rather weak leader, because of her demeanor. It does not fool VIvienne that a lot of her perceived stoicness is actually a shield. Then, she came to respect her and what she did, and regard her as a friend and valuable ally. Taashath became someone Vivienne could rely on. Does the Inquisitor help Vivienne look for the three tomes for the Circle of Magi?

Yes. It’s not exactly related to the Inquisition, but she always wishes to keep her closest ally content.

Does the Inquisitor agree to find Vivienne the heart of a Snowy Wyvern?

Yes. It’s the first time Vivienne directly asks for her help in a private matter, and she realizes this must be terribly important. Madame de Fer seems distressed also, and Taashath jumps to her help because she finds it so uncharacteristic of her.

Do they actually give Vivienne the heart, or do they give her the heart of a regular wyvern?

There is no reason to give her a fake heart, no reason not to trust Vivienne. After seeing Vivienne’s soft side, she feels more connected to her and was glad she tried to help, even if ultimately the Duke died.

Does the Inquisitor support Vivienne, the idea of Vivienne being Divine?

Not at first. She resonated more with Leliana’s ideas, and she had a mind of supporting the Left Hand of the Divine. After her personal assistant and apprentice, Sefridi Trevelyan, spoke to her in private, Taashath was more willing to support Vivienne in becoming Divine - especially because she is a mage. However, after more careful consideration and a talk with the Hero of Ferelden, Taashath ultimately chose Leliana.

BLACKWALL

Is Blackwall recruited?

Yes. The help of a Grey Warden when dealing with a darkspawn? Yes, please.

If he is, does he ever leave the Inquisition, and why?

No.

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Blackwall?

She is… honestly disappointed. She expected Grey Wardens to be different. For one, he does not offer much in the way of information, the very thing they recruited him for. Second, he is even reluctant to speak of his life as a Warden. But he seems like a good man and gives himself to the cause, so she values his help, although she’s not really sure he’s the best Grey Warden they could have come across.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why? She is hurt that he would lie about it all, when he could have simply joined the cause as a normal warrior. She wouldn’t have kicked him out for that. After some thinking, she figures that he is truly seeking atonement, and that he should be allowed to do that. He’s helped her all this time, after all, even if it was under a false name. She’s not one to not repay favours.

What does Blackwall think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

Surprised that Andraste would choose a qunari. But then he sees that she is a good woman, willing to do what it takes to close the Breach and defeat Corypheus, and vows to do better in regards to his own prejudices.

Does the Inquisitor help Blackwall find Grey Warden information across Thedas?

Yes. The more information they can gather, the better they can understand what’s going on. And it makes Blackwall happy, anyway.

How does the Inquisitor react to finding out Rainier’s true identity?

Very hurt at first. Why would he lie? Why would he not trust her with the truth? And then, angry. What are Leliana’s spies doing? Do they just believe anything they hear reported, not doing background checks? It’s a moment that makes her a bit paranoid, and becomes a little harsher in the way she deals with possible allies.

Do they leave them in Val Royeaux or bring them back to Skyhold for judgment?

She brings him to Skyhold for judgement. He is her soldier, she will deal with him herself. And then, she sees that he truly regrets what he did, and decides after all this is done he will become a real Warden.

DORIAN

Is Dorian recruited?

Yes. Shared trauma through time travel is the quickest way to friendship, as I said.

If he is, does he ever leave the Inquisition, and why?

No. He and Taashath basically become best of friends, always with their noses buried in books, chatting, supporting and confiding in each other. They enjoy their fair share of nights spent talking about life - lots of “I wish I could have” conversations - while enjoying some wine. Always in moderation, of course..

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Dorian?

Distrustful. He’s from Tevinter, and when she meets him she’s dealing with hostile Tevinters. It’s not really the best of introductions, but she’s willing to hear him out.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why? Yes, absolutely. After what they’ve been through in Redcliffe, they spend much time together. Taashath is quick to trust him after their ordeal and comes to him for questions regarding magic and Tevinter – as she’s never met someone from the place besides her ex-partner, and she has no fond memories of the place. As usual, she compliments him on things, sounds flirtatious because she has kind of a way with words, he flirts back because that’s just entertaining. This goes on for a while, until he comes forward and tells her he’s not interested. It’s… awkward, she tells him she’s not interested either. Wait, you’re gay? Wait, you’re lesbian? They laugh a lot about it, and it sorts of become their way of joking with each other. She finds his opinions on slavery gross, and tells him of her former partner’s experiences in Tevinter. It’s hard for him to accept, but she doesn’t let it go until he realizes he has much to think about.

What does Dorian think of the Inquisitor? Does this change? At first he is nervous. He’s afraid this qunari will punch him down and not trust him, but she demonstrates herself to be a valuable ally. After what they’ve been through in Redcliffe, he knows he can count on her, and slowly comes to considering her his best friend.

Does the Inquisitor help Dorian find and track down Venatori?

Yes. It’s not only a favour for Dorian, but beneficial to the Inquisition. Two birds and all that.

Does the Inquisitor learn that Dorian’s father wishes to speak with him?

Yes.

Do they tell Dorian about the letter or not?

Of course. It’s not her place to keep anything of the sort from him.

Do they urge Dorian to reconcile with his father, or do they let Dorian leave without reconciliation?

She understands, and she doesn’t want Dorian to feel like she’s forcing him to do something, but she tries to reason with him that this might be the last time he sees him, and if he wants to try – she’s there for him. It’s personal for her due to her own relationship with her family.

COLE

Is Cole recruited?

Yes. She found him immediately very interesting.

If he is, does he ever leave the Inquisition, and why?

No. Sometimes Taashath doesn’t know what’s best for him, but he feels useful and she finds him interesting. Almost feels a maternal instinct towards him.

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Cole?

His existence is something she didn’t think was possible, and is intrigued by the possibilities. She also finds his way of speaking very soothing.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? If not, why?

As they spend more time together, she comes to appreciate and grows fond of Cole not just as a strange occurrence, but as a person she has grown attached to. Sure, she wants to know more about him, but she’s also eager for him to experience the world as a person, and not just a spirit perusing beyond the veil.

What does Cole think of the Inquisitor? Does this change?

She tries to drown her own light to survive, but she’s still so bright. She is gentle, kind, and she understands.

When Cole helps people, does the Inquisitor encourage their spirit-like methods (such as making people forget him and mercy killings), or convince him there are different ways to help?

She encourages him to seek out different methods of helping, and tries to help him make connections with people so that he can help them better.

Does the Inquisitor urge Cole to forgive the Templar and embrace his spirit nature, or learn to grow by confronting the Templar and becoming more human? Cole – the spirit of compassion – was in pain for what Cole – the boy – suffered through. That boy’s pain was his pain, and was she going to tell him to just forgive and forget? For starving a helpless boy? She encouraged him to do what he thought was best, and this led to Cole confronting the Templar.

IRON BULL

Is Iron Bull recruited?

Yes. He’s a valuable asset.

If he is, does he ever leave the Inquisition, and why?

No. His contacts are important, and she… gains insight into an actual follower of the Qun.

What is the Inquisitor’s first impression of Iron Bull?

Surprised. At first she thinks he’s another Tal-Vashoth, but is left astonished when he confesses he’s a Ben-Hassrath. Asala told her of Ben-Hassrath, but still, she did not think he would be… so animated. She herself is prejudiced regarding qunari, as during the years she internalized what people said about her kind. She doesn’t know what to make of him, and this makes her anxious. She still recruits him, as his presence offers various advantages, but it’s almost like she’s studying him as well.

Does this impression change over time? If yes, how so? if not, why?

Definitely. He teaches her more about what it means living under the Qun, and helps her reconnect to this part of her heritage that she was so detached from. Their sparring sessions become a little relaxing ritual for her, and she enjoys the company of the Chargers, and admires the family bond he has with them. She envies him, in some ways. In time, this envy turns to admiration, and the two become great friends.

What does Iron Bull think of the Inquisitor? Does this change? She lives outside of the Qun, her parents are Tal-Vashoth – yet she is no savage, purposeless beast. She is a great warrior, a leader – an inspiration to many. He makes sure she knows her people well, makes sure her mental health is kept in check – it’s his job, after all. But after a while, it becomes less of a job and more something that he does out of his own volition, because she cares about her and considers her his friend.

Is the Inquisition approached by the Ben-Hassrath to secure a formal alliance?

Yes. It’s a strange moment for her. It’s still difficult for her to deal with qunari business.

During the attack of the dreadnaught, does the Inquisitor sacrifice the dreadnaught and the alliance, or Bull’s Chargers?

She knows the Chargers. She loves them. She knows how the Iron Bull loves them, and she doesn’t want him sacrificing them because he feels he’s obligated to. To hell the alliance, to hell the contacts, to hell the information – these are her people. The Bull taught her well, but doesn’t realize it. It’s one of the only “selfish” choices she makes in game.

#adaar #dragon age #dai #the inquisitor #taashath adaar #videogames #.txt

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bigfan-fanfic · 5 years

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About Tash Adaar

I know nobody asked, but I want to tell! :) Check out more about Tash using the tash adaar tag - link here or at the bottom.

what is your inquisitor’s name & race? Ataashi “Tash” Adaar - later Lord Ataashi “Tash” Adaar Hawke-Tethras of Kirkwall.

what is their sexual orientation? When Tash grows up, he prefers the company of men.

what do they look like? Drawing here.

how did they feel about being called “the herald of andraste”? Tash finds it strange, but to be frank, enjoys the preferential treatment he gets from it.

what are their religious beliefs, if they have any? Tash believes in the Maker, but he doesn’t subscribe to the Chant of Light. He has a pretty philosophical belief for one so young, and often wonders if all the gods of all the cultures are real, or if none of them are, or both. Solas’ musings on the Fade do nothing to help him determine the answers.

what is their opinion on the mage/templar war? Tash really wishes everyone would stop fighting each other and talk things out more. He understands why people fear mages, but thinks templars are supposed to protect mages and help them become better, not fight and abuse them.

who is your inquisitor’s best friend? Technically Varric or Cole, although they’re more surrogate family. Being so young, most of the Inner Circle serves a parental or uncle/aunt/older sibling role. So... his best friend might have to be Kieran. Morrigan is a bit surprised at the friendship between them.

who is their rival? Tash has not found it in him to forgive Sera for putting a sack full of lizards over his head and seriously freaking him out. But even so he considers Sera a friend, and while she didn’t apologize, she told him she’d prank anyone he wanted if he asked.

who is their love interest, if they chose one? do you ship them with anyone else/non-romanceable options? Tash is a kid of about 11-12, so no love interests. However... I do sort of ship him with Kieran, as they both are sweethearts, and I think when they’re older, they’ll be really sweet together.

warrior, rogue, or mage? Mage. Knight-Enchanter.

how do they feel about the dalish? Tash thinks the Dalish are unnecessarily unfriendly. He thinks that generally they’re rather mean. However, he is fascinated by the stories of their gods, and pesters Solas to no end for more Dalish tales.

how do they feel about the qun? Tash thinks that the Qun is no better than slavery, and is absolutely disgusted by it.

how do they feel about the chantry? Tash feels persecuted by the Chantry due to his magic and his horns. He wonders if Cassandra is right and it does more good than ill, but Tash believes that it is unlikely for mortals to actually know the will of the Maker.

which demon is most frightening to them? Imshael was the most frightening demon Tash encountered, even more so than the Nightmare, because Imshael could likely convince anyone to do anything.

did they choose the qun or the chargers in iron bull’s personal quest? why? The Chargers. Not only does Tash have utter disdain for the Qun, he realized that it was a test for Bull and can’t stand how they put him through that. He saves the Chargers without hesitation.

when are they the happiest? Before the Inquisition, he was happiest when his fathers and brother would take him to the Grand Tourney to see the melee. Now he’s happiest sitting in front of the fire, writing or reading while Varric writes on the desk behind him and Hawke plays with the mabari.

how do they feel about the mark/the anchor? Tash feels weird about the mark. It’s definitely useful, and is indirectly responsible for him making so many friends, but he hates when it hurts him, and it makes the whispers he hears grow ever stronger...

upon first meeting cole, were they afraid of him? Tash adores Cole, and loves how he can voice the strange thoughts whirling in the back of his mind. Tash also uses Cole as a human teddy bear sometimes when the nightmares get to be too much, as it reminds him of when his brother used to hug him.

did they use the templars or the mages to close the breach? Tash used the mages, although there’s a part of him that feels very guilty after hearing that Therinfal Redoubt fell to demons.

what was their court approval like at the winter palace? did they have any fun at all? Tash quickly achieved 100 Court Approval at the Winter Palace, mostly by just being polite, despite starting out at a huge deficit due to being a Qunari and a child. Tash loves dancing, and also danced his way to the top of the Court, even getting in dances with Cyril de Montfort and Lady Mantillon.

someone is encroaching on their love interest. how do they respond? Young Tash will be very petty, maybe even set Sera on the encroacher. As he grows older, he becomes more proficient in the Jane Austen school of polite put-downs under the tutelage of Vivienne.

what is their favourite weapon? Tash likes his staff, but he really admires warriors using swords and shields. This stems from his early crushes on the warriors, knights, sellswords, mercenaries, and chevaliers in the Grand Tourney of Markham.

are there any creatures in the wild that they refuse to/are reluctant to kill? why? Fennecs, because they are adorable. He also cried when they had to hunt rams. Tash likes meat, but he prefers not to see it when it was alive. Also Tash doesn’t like killing snofluers because they don’t do anything but waddle around. Tash tends to have a way with animals, even once befriending a bear in the Hinterlands, so he doesn’t like killing any wild animals he’s bonded with.

what is their opinion on blood magic? would they ever use it, if given the chance? Privately, Tash thinks blood magic isn’t so bad if the blood is given consensually. Mostly Tash is afraid of the sight of blood, so he probably would never use it and publicly displays a conservative opinion of the practice.

what is their favourite place within playable regions? The Storm Coast. Tash loves the combination of the rain and ocean, although the shiny and sparkly Val Royeaux is a close second.

did they feel suspicious of dorian upon first meeting him, because of his tevinter heritage? Tash was slightly afraid of getting to know Dorian because he was afraid the whole Qunari-Tevinter thing would mean Dorian would hate him on principle. But he quickly warmed to Dorian after the altus correctly determined he was a Vashoth.

as a whole, how do they feel about tevinter + the imperium? Tash likes the idea of mages being able to govern, but hates the idea of slavery. Besides, Tevinters tend to hate him on sight, so he’s wary of them. He’s also SO over their pointy outfits and asymmetrical fashion.

did they encourage cullen to continue taking lyrium, or to stop? for what reasons? Tash urged Cullen to stop, not only because Tash gets really weirded out by lyrium, even the blue kind (sometimes he thinks he hears it whispering and refuses to even take lyrium potions) but also because he doesn’t want Cullen to lose his mind to it. Cullen was so ashamed when he threw his lyrium kit and nearly hit Tash in the head with it that he became that much more motivated to quit.

does it bother them to sleep in tents when on the road with the inquisition? Tash dislikes sleeping in tents, because his horns don’t let him get comfortable. It gets even worse after Josephine commissions special horn cushions for him at Skyhold.

are they an optimist, a pessimist, or neutral? An eternal optimist. An optimist who is scared of everything. Although living with Varric and Hawke makes him slightly more of a cynicial optimist.

if varric wrote a book about your inquisitor, how would they feel about that? Tash loves Varric’s writings, and is super excited and honored to be written about. Of course, it gets annoying later when people start expecting him to be more like his self in the book.

do they get along with vivienne? Tash gets along exceptionally well with Vivienne, to the amusement and confusion of many of the Inner Circle. He respects her skill in both magic and the Game, and although he disagrees with her about the Circles, he even becomes known as her protegee.

are they afraid of anything specifically? Spiders, all insects, Tranquility, blood, darkspawn, dragons, heights, the dark, the Qun, archers, and nugs.

what was their reaction to the destruction of haven? Tash was more than a little traumatized by the events. He already had a fear of dragons, and now he is terrified of them, as well as iffy around fire. Thankfully he helped get most of the people out of Haven or he’d be even more fearful.

how do they feel about “the game”? Tash enjoys playing the Grand Game of Orlais, as he has a natural flair for etiquette, and loves being able to use it to his advantage. He also loves the sparkly masks.

are they especially protective of certain inquisition members, even those capable of defending themselves? Tash had a huge crush on Blackwall, and was very protective of him. Tash is likewise close to Cole, Josephine, Varric, and Cullen.

do they like their skyhold pajamas? Tash finds them to be comfortable, but wants to wear something in brighter colors, immediately going to Vivienne or Josephine to make it happen.

are there any insults they find to be especially offensive? (i.e. “knife ear”/”rabbit” for elves, “oxmen” for qunari, ect.) Tash hates being referred to as an “ox,” but also can’t stand being called “Qunari.” He prefers to be known as a Vashoth, or at the very least a Tal-Vashoth.

if varric gave them a nickname, what would it be? Tash’s nickname is Dimples, for the little divots that appear whenever he smiles, which is frequently.

do they enjoy being the inquisitor? Tash enjoys being able to help people and influence events towards helping people. However he was slightly traumatized at losing his arm and immediately stepped down afterwards.

#my inquisitors #OCs #tash adaar #dragon age

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roxiefreeman1995-blog · 5 years

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14 Principles of Success in Online Earning

In the event that you've been keen on web based procuring, you've heard in any event once that 98 out of each 100 advertisers neglect to perceive any obvious profit on the web. On the off chance that you've additionally perused any of Dr. Napoleon Hill's works, you have perused in some structure that 98 out of each 100 individuals who are disappointed with their reality don't have an unmistakable picture in their brains of the world they might want for themselves. This is no negligible incident. The very reason that such a significant number of individuals who begin off with the enthusiasm of acquiring cash from their work area or PC never achieve that fantasy is the way that they do not understand what gaining on the web ought to be for them! Not to stress, on the off chance that you are one of these individuals who aren't getting what they look for from web based acquiring, Dr. Slope likewise gives us a diagram to really making the progress that you want; the 17 Principles of Success. These standards hold extraordinary influence to whatever you pick, including getting the wealth you want on the web. Exercise 1: Definiteness of Purpose-Definiteness of direction is the beginning stage of all accomplishment. Without a reason and an arrangement, individuals float heedlessly through life. This angle is urgent to have before you even turn on your PC. Set aside the effort to make sense of your qualities, what you like doing and are great at. Get a thought of what it is you really need to do to get cash before you begin your hunt. Having an unmistakable picture as a primary concern enables you to see the open doors that are directly for you, just as stay away from tricksters. Exercise 2: Mastermind Alliance-The brains rule comprises of a union of at least two personalities working in ideal agreement for the achievement of a typical target. Achievement does not come without the collaboration of others. Many do feel that since you are telecommuting, you are working alone. This is really impeding to your prosperity. You need to get around the individuals who are having accomplishment in their own business and are happy to share data and thoughts. Having these individuals as your guides will assist you with being in the correct mentality for progress. Exercise 3: Applied Faith-Faith is a perspective through which your points, wants, plans and purposes might be converted into their physical or money related identical. Numerous individuals think a solid portion of wariness is what is important to explore through acquiring on the web. While you ought to assess any open door you go over, you additionally need to keep a receptive outlook and confidence that there is an approach to win the pay of your wants from your PC JUST FOR YOU. Exercise 4: Going the Extra Mile-The activity of rendering more and preferred administration over that for which you are directly paid. When you go the additional mile, the law of pay becomes possibly the most important factor. When you discover the road of acquiring that is best for you, you should start giving more than what you are as of now paid. On the off chance that you find an online line of work, this would mean going well beyond in your characterized position; on account of business, contacting everybody that you convey on board to the business and help them in the most ideal manner you can, regardless of whether you are paid for that help or not. Making this a reliable propensity will impel you to new and awesome statures in your picked setting. Exercise 5: Pleasing Personality-The whole of one's psychological, otherworldly, and physical qualities and propensities that recognize one from all the others. The factor decides if one is loved or disdained by others. When you are in your picked scene, the principal thing that will separate you from every other person will be a satisfying identity. This is the thing that pulls in individuals to buy from you, and trust the data you are giving. It likewise calls the consideration of supervisory people to help you in climbing the positions towards your prosperity. Exercise 6: Personal Initiative-The power that rouses the fulfillment of that which one starts. The power begins all activity. No individual is free until he figures out how to do his very own reasoning and gains the mettle to follow up on his own. Once more, when you telecommute you have nobody behind you guiding you. This is an opportunity however it accompanies profound duty. You must have the order to meet booked working occasions and assignment objectives as given. Much more so on the off chance that you work an independent venture. You should make those calendars and objectives for yourself at that point accomplish them. Exercise 7: Positive Mental Attitude-The privilege mental frame of mind in all conditions. Achievement pulls in more achievement while disappointment draws in more disappointment. Regardless of where you are throughout everyday life, what has occurred in the past with different organizations, or how frequently you endeavored the online income you had always wanted; you should unquestionably put stock in your capacity to accomplish your objectives and continue toward acquiring them. On the off chance that you harp on the negative conditions that you have encountered previously, you are destined to experience more hardship. Remain concentrated on the objectives that you have, and how you will feel when these objectives are accomplished, this will move you towards more and proceeded with progress. Exercise 8: Enthusiasm-Enthusiasm is confidence in real life. It is the extraordinary feeling known as deep yearning. It originates from inside, despite the fact that it emanates ostensibly in the statement of one's voice and face. This is one of the fundamental explanations behind the standard in business that "Individuals don't join openings, individuals join individuals" remains constant. At the point when an individual joins a chance, it isn't on the grounds that it's the best out there, it's that the individual that acquainted them with the open door had the capacity to get that individual amped up for the business and to see themselves in the chance. The main way this should be possible is to demonstrate eagerness in each get in touch with you make. This additionally necessitates you be in an open door that you trust in past just pay, IMHO. Exercise 9: Self-Discipline-Self-discipline starts with the authority of thought. In the event that you don't control your contemplations, you can't control your necessities. Self-control requires an adjusting of the feelings of your heart with the thinking personnel of your head. Another integral reason, yet little discussed reason that individuals neglect to see steady cash in online business is that some can assembled every one of the pieces and win a decent single amount beginning in a specific business; however as opposed to putting a bit again into said business, they do different things that in the end stop their progression of leads into their channel. Another purpose behind disappointment returns to Lesson 6; many are accustomed to having a set rundown of directions and somebody behind them driving them to finish their work task. Presently, with the nonappearance of these drivers, they neglect to reliably put exertion towards the training and advancement of their business; again making their traffic evaporate. So as to prevail in online business, you should have the self-control to make a planned routine of the considerable number of errands you have to perform so as to acquire cash; at that point put that reliable exertion behind getting these undertakings finished all the time. Exercise 10: Accurate Thinking-The intensity of thought is the most risky or the most useful power accessible to man, contingent upon how it is utilized. The central factor of home business has nothing to do with what business you are in or how you advance that business, its trusting that IT CAN HAPPEN FOR YOU. You need to know without question that you can prevail in the endeavor that you have picked. The minute you start to question that you can learn or execute, that is the minute that you begin to come up short. Exercise 11: Controlled Attention-Controlled consideration prompts authority in a human undertaking, since it empowers one to center the forces of his brain upon the accomplishment of an unequivocal target and to keep it so coordinated voluntarily. This exercise centers around two kinds of individuals that neglect to see income on the web; those that quit once they don't see a million dollars medium-term, and the individuals who have the "program container disorder. The two of them miss the mark because of a certain something, expecting the open doors they are in are genuine: They neglect to put any enduring exertion behind any one framework to see the outcomes they are searching for. One you have picked a chance, you should then gain proficiency with everything you can about the open door itself and the most ideal approaches to approach possibility for that business. What's more, that realizing must be executed on a reliable premise too; never get into "examination loss of motion" Learn an expertise, execute that ability on a predictable premise, ace at that point proceed onward to the following. Exercise 12: Teamwork-Teamwork is agreeable participation that is ready, intentional and free. At whatever point the soul of collaboration is the ruling impact in business or industry, achievement is unavoidable. Amicable participation is an extremely valuable resource that you can gain in extent to your giving. Despite the fact that you are in an independent venture it doesn't imply that you should work alone. Numerous organizations do offer gatherings and meeting where individuals meet up and share thoughts and systems; anyway go further and work with every individual that you convey locally available to your chance. Offer thoughts and what procedures have by and by worked for you. As the idiom goes; "In the event that you help enough individuals get what they need, you will get what you need." Exercise 13: Adversity and Defeat-Individual achievement more often than not is in accurate extent of the extent of the thrashing the individual has encountered and aced. Some so-in mask. Many take the barriers they experience in advancing self-start venture as motivation to surrender... on the off chance that you need achievement this can't be you! Rather, each opportunity you face a barrier, you should perceive any reason why your endeavors have flopped and afterward alter them as needs be. Disappointment is impermanent, it possibly winds up changeless when you acknowledge it all things considered. Exercise 14: Creative Vision-Creative vision is created by the free and courageous utilization of one's creative ability. It's anything but an inexplicable quality with which one is talented or isn't skilled during childbirth. Never fear your thoughts, EVER! As you keep your mind ....... It is amazing to see that what Dr. Hill wrote many years before the internet was even conceived still applies seamlessly to Online and Home Business today. If your goal is to have tremendous success from home, you must align yourself with the 17 principles above, or else suffer along with the 97%

#illustration logo psd illustrator stock vector twist Service best tracing Trace ImageTracing graphicsdesign graphics art drawing sket vect

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sapphim · 7 years

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400+ tiefling virtue names

I started out brainstorming a couple more names for Verity’s backstory and ended up going way overboard. Enjoy.

Abandon, Able, Absence, Abstract, Abundance, Abyss, Adept, Adore, Affinity, Agony, Aid, Allure, Alone, Amaze, Ambition, Amity, Amuse, Anarchy, Anchor, Anger, Anguish, Apology, Aptitude, Ardent, Aria, Arise, Art, Ash, Assurance, Audacity

Balance, Beauty, Belief, Benevolent, Bitter, Blame, Blaze, Blessing, Bliss, Blithe, Bond, Bravery, Brazen, Breezy, Bright, Brilliance

Cacophony, Calm, Candor, Capable, Care, Caress, Carrion, Casualty, Caution, Celerity, Chance, Change, Chaos, Charade, Charisma, Charity, Charm, Chastity, Cheer, Cherish, Chime, Chivalry, Clandestine, Clarity, Clement, Clever, Cloud, Comedy, Comfort, Command, Compassion, Condolence, Confide, Constance, Contempt, Content, Conviction, Courage, Covert, Craven, Creative, Creed, Cryptic, Curiosity

Dare, Darkness, Darling, Dart, Dawn, Death, Defiance, Defile, Deft, Delight, Delirium, Deliverance, Dementia, Derision, Desire, Despair, Destiny, Destruction, Devotion, Diamond, Dignity, Diligence, Discord, Discovery, Disdain, Divine, Divinity, Dodge, Doom, Doubt, Dread, Dream, Dulcet, Dusk, Dust

Earnest, Ecstasy, Edge, Eloquence, Elusive, Ember, Empathy, Endure, Enigma, Ennui, Envy, Epiphany, Essence, Esteem, Eternal, Ethereal, Euphoria, Ever, Excellence, Experience

Failure, Faith, Farewell, Fascination, Fate, Favor, Fear, Felicity, Finesse, Flair, Flaw, Flight, Fluke, Forsaken, Fortune, Frailty, Free, Fright, Future

Gaiety, Gallant, Gamble, Gem, Generous, Gentle, Gift, Glee, Glory, Golden, Grace, Greed, Grief, Guile, Guilt, Gutter

Hale, Harbor, Hardy, Harm, Harmony, Harvest, Haste, Haunted, Haven, Havoc, Hazard, Heart, Hearth, Hero, Honesty, Honor, Hope, Horror, Humble, Hunger, Hunter, Hurt

Idea, Ideal, Imagine, Increase, Inferno, Infinity, Instinct, Integrity, Intrepid

Jaunty, Joker, Journey, Joy, Jubilee, Judgment, Just, Justice

Kindness, Knack

Lament, Laughter, Legacy, Legend, Level, Liberation, Liberty, Light, Lively, Loathing, Lord, Lovely, Loyal, Lucky, Luxury

Magic, Majesty, Malevolence, Martyr, Mayhem, Meander, Melody, Memory, Mercy, Merit, Merry, Midnight, Miracle, Mirth, Mistake, Mockery, Modesty, Moral, Motive, Muse, Music, Mute, Mystery

Noble, Nobody, Nothing, Nowhere

Obscure, Open, Origin, Original

Pain, Panache, Panic, Pardon, Parry, Passion, Patience, Peace, Plague, Pleasant, Pleasure, Poetry, Power, Praise, Precious, Presence, Prestige, Pride, Principle, Promise, Prosper, Prudence, Purity, Purpose, Pursuit

Quest, Question, Quicken, Quiet, Quirk

Radiance, Rage, Rain, Random, Ransom, Rapture, Rarity, Raven, Raze, Reason, Rebel, Recollection, Refrain, Regal, Regret, Remark, Remember, Remorse, Repentance, Rescue, Resent, Resolve, Respect, Rest, Retreat, Retribution, Revel, Revelation, Revere, Revile, Revolt, Rhyme, Riches, Righteous, Riot, Rise, Risk, River, Rotten, Royal, Rue, Rumor, Rush, Ruthless

Sadness, Saga, Sage, Salvation, Sanctuary, Sarcasm, Savage, Savvy, Scorn, Secret, Serendipity, Serenity, Severity, Shame, Sharp, Shelter, Silence, Sincerity, Sly, Snow, Soft, Solace, Solemn, Song, Sorrow, Spark, Speedy, Spirit, Stellar, Still, Storm, Strength, Struggle, Subtle, Success, Suspicion, Swift, Sympathy

Talent, Temerity, Temperance, Tempest, Tenacity, Tender, Terror, Thankful, Tolerance, Torch, Torment, Tragedy, Tranquil, Treachery, Treason, Treasure, Tribute, Triumph, True, Trust, Turmoil, Twilight, Twist

Umbrage, Undone, Union, Unique, Unity

Valiant, Valor, Value, Vanity, Venture, Verity, Vice, Victor, Vigil, Vigor, Violence, Virtue, Visit

Wait, Warning, Warrant, Wary, Way, Wealth, Weary, Welcome, Whisper, Will, Wisdom, Wish, Wistful, Wit, Wonder, Worth, Wrath

Zeal, Zenith

#d&d #tiefling #names #dnd blogging #there are so many easter eggs in here I've probably already forgotten most of them but congratulations if you find any #100 #500 #ttrpgposting

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chaj · 5 years

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via www.hotnewhiphop.com

Since it first lurched out of the boroughs to take the world by storm, hip-hop has had a very clear set of governing principles that were meant to be upheld at all costs. Built on a foundation of respect and authenticity, these two traits-- along with an awareness of the founding four elements-- were regarded as pre-requisites for a successful career. Paying homage to the past was not only advised but near-mandatory. Referred to in the same way as a warrior’s code, any departures from these sacred commandments would lead to either verbal or physical consequences as you strove to keep your honor intact.

Tupac posing at KMEL Summer Jam, 1992 - Tim Mosenfelder/Getty Images

Spearheaded by a new generation of brash and uncompromising artists, these closely-held values are now being degraded from a cultural necessity to a form of outdated scripture. In many ways, this era of indignation and dismissal of the past was instigated by the divisive Lil Xan. Regarded with wariness from the outset, devout hip-hop fans soon had all the relevant evidence to bestow a cultural death sentence on young Diego. Xan declared, without a hint of irony, that the late Tupac Shakur’s output was “boring music” and he quickly incurred rap music’s collective wrath because of it. An irrevocable trespass in the eyes of many, the hip-hop community quickly vocalized their outrage and the debate reached its peak when Waka Flocka and T.I decreed that Xan was “banned” forevermore. Amid all of the uproar, a few scattered voices leaped to his defense and presented a case for clemency.

No stranger to incensing hip-hop fans in his own right, one of the most vocal combatants of the persecution of Lil Xan was his peer and friend Trippie Redd. Relayed over Instagram Live, Trippie believed all of the criticism to be not only unwarranted but irrational:

“Do you see who he is? Of course he don’t like 2Pac … He don’t necessarily gotta like 2Pac to be Hip Hop, nigga. If he think that shit boring, he think that shit boring. That shit is not a part of this new era anyway.”

What Trippie couldn’t have known is that his remarks have captured the spirit of a generational shift towards disregarding hip-hop’s longstanding code of conduct. A week before Kodak Black gained the world’s ire with his blatantly disrespectful comments about Nipsey Hussle and Lauren London, the ever-contentious rapper echoed the sentiments of Lil Xan from a year earlier. Once again, the dangerously unfiltered nature of Instagram Live brought Kodak’s barbed tongue to the fore and led to the Project Baby unloading his views on why Biggie and Pac are so revered:

“People tryna say, oh, I can't put myself in the category with 2Pac and them," Kodak told his Instagram Live audience. "Actually, I'm better than them n***as. You know why? Like, 'cause, I live what I rap about. Them n***as was just like, them n***as was just legends 'cause they died."

The Notorious B.I.G at the Billboard Music Awards, 1995 - Larry Busacca/WireImage/Getty Images

In the past, no rapper on the come-up would’ve dared to say something so sacrilegious in fear of alienating their audience and thus lightening their pockets. For this new, defiant generation, they don’t seem to be emulating the stringent self-policed headspace of hip-hop’s past, rather, another rebellious subculture entirely. Formed on the same DIY spirit that empowered today’s internet-spawned artists, the ideology of the UK punk scene of the late 1970’s bears a striking resemblance to the impudence of hip-hop’s new breed. Disenchanted with the pomposity of the world’s biggest rock outfits, the architects of punk regarded the technical wizardry of prog or psychedelia as a pollutant and instead stripped guitar music back to its bare bones.

Conceived of as the antidote to Led Zeppelin, Yes, King Crimson and Pink Floyd among others, the difference in their ethos and sound would soon serve to undermine these fully-established acts. Where the globe-trotting artists of the day were increasingly enamored with complex musical theory and pretentious concept albums, the bands of the emergent underground were working with a maximum of three chords and made their lyricism and melodies punchier and more conversational. Sound familiar?

The Sex Pistols performing live in Copenhagen, 1977 - Keystone/Getty Images

In order to fully illustrate this analogy, the focus will hinge upon two of punk’s most incendiary and beloved bands: The Sex Pistols and The Clash. Concentrated around the Kings Road in London, these two bands made a name for themselves by embodying the unrest and discontent that its youths were experiencing. Although they may not be the first British punk band, the ragtag group of snarling misfits known as the Sex Pistols rejected the status quo and were even banned from their native UK’s airwaves for tracks such as the treasonous “God Save The Queen.” Hounded by the press and the law at every turn, their notorious profanity-laden interview with Bill Grundy courted the same sort of widespread outrage that the unvetted Instagram Live’s of today’s hip-hop artists contend with. Away from the music, their desired destruction of the past bled into their clothing as they donned t-shirts declaring “I HATE PINK FLOYD.” Years on from his tenure as an agent of chaos, The Sex Pistols’ frontman Johnny Rotten conceded that Pink Floyd have “done great stuff” and that he “loves” their seminal Dark Side Of The Moon LP.

Coinciding with The Sex Pistols’ rise was the formation of The Clash. Born of ethnically diverse areas such as Ladbroke Grove and Brixton, the four-piece of Joe Strummer, Mick Jones, Paul Simonon, and Topper Headon took the fast-paced barrage and weaponized it to take on social inequalities. In spite of this, they found plenty of time to take aim at the rock music ruling class, seen as an extension of the machine, on “1977.” As blatant as any diss track, the track’s chorus sees Joe venomously bellow “No Elvis, Beatles Or The Rolling Stones.” No matter how scathing it sounded, the late Joe Strummer would later admit that hearing The Rolling Stones in his boarding school dorm room was instrumental in pursuing music as his key concern in life.

Vince Staples performing at ComplexCon, 2018 - Earl Gibson III/Getty Images

Through these historical examples, our current hip-hop artists disdainful renouncement of the past may be easier to comprehend. By vilifying the very artists that they’d grown up on, punk music was unshackling the expectations of what came before them and they were free to forge their own legacy. Unbounded by comparisons or supposed influence, their motivations to destroy and rebuild ensured that they contributed their own distinct fragment to the rich tapestry of musical history. Informed by that same desire to stand on their own two feet, Vince Staples labeling the 90’s greats as “overrated” and Lil Uzi’s vehement refusal to freestyle over a DJ Premier production has a great deal more validity than just cultural naivety. Just like Lil Yachty’s claims that “older hip-hop people don’t understand evolution” or 03 Greedo’s insistence that there’s no onus to pay homage to 2Pac, they’ve all made a concerted effort to distance themselves from the past.

Thus, could it be that the perceived disrespect from new rappers doesn't come from a place of ignorance but rather, may be informed by an ambition to surpass their predecessors and claim their own spots on the hip-hop Mt. Rushmore? Far from being something to revile, this unwillingness to treat the genre with the solemn, unchangeable respect of a war memorial is pivotal in ensuring that hip-hop doesn't end up at a creative standstill or fall victim to complacency.

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kimvtae · 8 years

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Drag Me Down (To Hell) | 02

↬ Summary: There’s a darkness to your city, a murderous underbelly filled with crime and deceit that you’ve sworn to avoid at all costs. But the universe has funny ways of forcing your involvement in the form of a notorious mob boss and his young daughter. ↬ Pairing: Jeongguk x reader ↬ Genre: mafia!au ↬ Rating: Mature (for themes; will change in later chapters) ↬ Word Count: 9.931

Part 01 - Part 03 - Part 04 - Part 05

When you had told Jeongguk to only call you for matters pertaining to Surin, you hadn’t expected that call to come so soon.

Two full weeks have not passed since the day you learned who Jeongguk really was, since the day you noticed something amiss at the park and realized you felt some kind of drive to keep Surin safe. She was a young girl growing up surrounded by gangsters, guns, and violence. Yeah, she could use a little help.

Taehyung had been avoiding your calls, sending each to voicemail every time you dialed his number. You knew why, of course. Taehyung had kept his involvement with Jeongguk a secret from you, and you’d be lying if you said learning of his affiliation hadn’t angered you beyond belief. He’d kept you safe for longer than you could remember, and from the moment you met him you’d sworn to do the same. How were you to keep him out of trouble if Taehyung was working for said trouble?

Jeongguk calls you one night a few hours before sunrise, and you have a suspicious feeling that he probably hadn’t slept. You speculate briefly, squinting at the caller ID in disdain, if Jeongguk killed anyone tonight.

“Yes, Jeon?”

Jeongguk sighs, sounding absolutely exhausted. “I asked you to call me Jeongguk.”

“And I said no. You’re an employer and nothing else.” You prop yourself onto an elbow, rubbing sleep out of your eyes. “Why’d you call?”

“Can you watch Surin this Saturday? Show up around nine am?”

“Yes.”

“Great,” Jeongguk says. “Y/N, thank y-”

You hang up, tossing your phone to the other side of the bed, and fall asleep wondering if one of Jeongguk’s thugs had tucked Surin in that night.

On Saturday Taehyung was waiting for you outside the door to your apartment, sitting against the opposite wall. His expression was blank, his hair dye already beginning to fade, and when he gestures for you to follow to his car, you comply without a word. You’d been planning on taking the subways, of course, but it was still cold out and you needed to talk to Taehyung. Needed to ask why he would risk his life in the underground, and most importantly, why he would risk it for the Jeons.

Usually there’s music playing in Taehyung’s car, ranging from violent rap to American pop love songs, but never a quiet moment whenever you accepted a ride from him. This time, there was nothing playing when Taehyung starts the car, and the first half of the drive is silent.

Finally, it gets to be enough. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Taehyung merges onto the highway before answering. “Remember before I graduated high school? I said I got job offers from a couple of sketchy guys and you brushed me off, said my life was mine?”

“Was it an offer from Jeon?”

“No, but he stopped me from joining the Zhangs.”

“The Zhangs!?”

“Yeah,” Taehyung chuckles, but you don’t miss the way his grip tightens on the steering wheel, his knuckles straining. “Yeah. If I’d joined them I’d probably be dead by now.”

If the Jeon mob was the most deadly, well-known association in Seoul, then the Zhangs were the most deadly, least-known association. Men like Jeongguk’s sometimes were caught, sometimes were written about in the paper or spotted in the underground, but the Zhangs were notorious for silent hits. Although any mobster had to have stealth and control of a situation, almost all of the time the Zhangs managed to get in and out and get hours away before anyone realized someone had moved.

“You almost worked for the Zhangs,” you breathe, slumping into your seat. It was bad enough learning that your brother, the only person you trusted completely, had been working for criminals, but to learn that he nearly set foot in the Zhang association? Well, that only made matters worse.

“Yeah. Jeon saved my ass, and here we are today.”

“Did you know?”

“Know what?”

“Know it was Jeongguk when I showed you that flyer?”

Taehyung takes a deep breath, his jaw tensing for a moment before he nods. “Why do you think I was so adamant about you not taking a damn babysitter job?”

Taehyung merges off of the highway and onto a back road you don’t recognize, but after a few minutes you see Jeongguk’s estate coming into view. From here, you could see a man on the balcony on the second floor, and as the car approaches, you can see the gun the man is holding.

“Taetae?” You ask quietly, after Taehyung gains clearance to the grounds.

“Yes, love?”

“Can Jeon be trusted?”

Taehyung climbs out of the car, nods to someone you can’t see, and leans back through the window to smile hesitantly at you. “Strip away the gun and power, Y/N, and Jeongguk’s just a guy trying to keep his daughter safe. Use your judgment. You know he’ll let you walk away the minute you’re uncomfortable. Don’t do anything stupid, and keep your eyes and ears open.”

In the weeks that follow, you have a suspicious feeling that a kind of switch was flipped within Jeongguk’s estate. Before, you only spotted Jeongguk when he left or returned from his meetings or missions, and only ever saw his men if you couldn’t sleep during the night and happened to witness one walking their rounds.

Now, however, Jeongguk’s men were in and out of the house several times a day, everyday. If you arrived in the morning to watch Surin, at least three men or women were seated at the dining room table, drinking coffee and arguing over files, laptops open and pistols on the table. If you came over for the evening, you saw them leaving or returning with bloodstained hands and conspicuous bags. Worst of all, if you were over for a whole day or weekend, you would see Jeongguk’s men interact with Surin.

At first, you hadn’t thought much of that. Jimin interacted with Surin all the time, helped her to bed or school if you or Jeongguk wasn’t available. But you quickly noticed that these men and women held their guns in hand whenever they saw Surin, or had the pistols and revolvers in their back pockets. They waved at Surin with bloody hands or grinned, showing missing teeth from an interrogation that had likely gone bad. On those nights, when you can’t get Surin out of the room before one of the men get home, Surin doesn’t sleep. Instead, she begs you to stay in her bedroom with her, and spends the night clutching your arm, tossing and turning instead of getting any rest.

“She can’t go on like this,” you say one spring afternoon. You’re standing in the gardens, Jimin on one side of you and Taehyung on the other. Namjoon, Hoseok, and Seokjin were helping Surin to build a big playhouse that Jeongguk had brought home. Yoongi was napping in one of the patio chairs, his gun tucked under his sweater.

Recently, you had snapped at a man named Bogum when he tried to high-five Surin with a bloody hand, and since then you’ve done your best to keep Surin around the few of Jeongguk’s men you liked to think you knew. Taehyung told you one night, after you’d had a few shots of tequila and called him crying, that there were a few men of Jeongguk’s mob that he trusted with more than his life, and you were trying to adopt the same principle. You were still extraordinarily wary of them, but you’d recognized Namjoon as one of the men you saw during your first nights in the estate, and for some reason that had calmed you somewhat.

“Like what, Y/N?” Jimin asks.

“Let me rephrase that. I don’t want any of Jeon’s other men interacting with her.” Surin waves at you from the top of Namjoon’s shoulders, and you can’t help but to smile back. She was too precious for this life. “They’re not like you guys, and who knows? One of them could fire without notice, or the gun could have gone off when that idiot Yugeom tried to teach her how to clean it!”

Taehyung grimaces. “Yeah, Jeon chewed him out for that. You’re not wrong. Jeon was a little more concerned with burning his last alias when he bought this place than with training his men on how to act around his infant kid.”

You scoff. It’s common knowledge not to wave a loaded gun around a damn child. “They treat her like she’s a thug in training!”

Jimin wrinkles his nose, but doesn’t comment on your choice of words. “What’s your plan?”

Shrugging, you kick at loose pebbles on the ground. What could you do, really? You had no power here, no say in anything that happened. Hell, if Surin wasn’t around you would never have stepped foot on this property again. What could you do?

“I’ll keep her away from them, I guess.” You say. You see Taehyung glance at you, but ignore it. “Until they can learn how to act around a child.”

But that proves to be much easier said than done. As glorified, bulky spies, Jeongguk’s men know how to sneak into and out of buildings, and know how to return to Jeongguk’s estate silently when it’s late and they assume Surin’s asleep. And most of the time she is, but sometimes she falls asleep on your shoulder after a movie, and you’re loath to move her until you need sleep as well. Tonight, you startle as a woman by the name of Victoria walks in, shouldering two guns, and your movement wakes Surin. There’s blood on Victoria’s face, and the three men who walk in wave with bloody hands before they go off to clean their guns, and you’ve had enough.

“Time for bed, Surin,” you say.

“Stay with me?” She asks, staring up at you with wide, terrified eyes.

You swallow down your disgust for the men you can hear stomping around upstairs, and carry her into her room. “Of course, but I need to speak to your dad before I can.”

“Is daddy home?”

“I’m about to find out.”

It’s difficult to leave Surin alone in her bed, curled into her sheets and shaking a little. She was far too young to be this scared of her own damn home. Jeongguk wasn’t supposed to be home until the morning, but he had a habit of getting home early, and if a lot of his men were trickling into the house, then there was more than a good chance that Jeongguk was in, too.

“Hey,” one man, you think his name is Jaebum, says, reaching for your arm as you approach Jeongguk’s office. You dodge him, saying nothing. “You can’t go in there-!”

You shove the door open with a little more force than necessary, the handle slamming into the back wall. The office was exactly how you remembered it from the first and only time you’d been inside nearly two months ago, and for a split second you marvel at how quickly things could change. Two months ago, you were ready to walk out of this estate without a second glance, and now you were back inside to demand change to better protect a mobster’s daughter.

“Not now, Y/N,” Jeongguk says. He’s sitting behind his desk, wiping at his bloody arm with a towel. He looks exhausted, eyes drooping as he tries to focus. Out of everyone in the estate, you’d seen the least of Jeongguk since agreeing to stay as Surin’s nanny. “Y/N, please-”

Undeterred, you stalk toward Jeongguk’s desk on heavy feet, weighed down by your own fatigue and disgust and knowledge that any person in this home could snap your neck without a second thought. You slam your fists on the desk, breathing heavily from working yourself up. Jeongguk stops cleaning his arm, and glances at you with an eyebrow raised. His hair was matted with what you really hoped wasn’t blood.

“This needs to end.”

Jeongguk frowns. “Are you resigning, Y/N? Can I at least have two weeks-?”

“No, Jeon. I’m not leaving.” His brows furrow in confusion, and you sigh heavily. “Surin’s being raised around more guns than people, Jeon. If one more of your men come in covered in blood to see her, I’m convinced she won’t sleep again. This needs to change, Jeon, and it needs to change now.”

“Okay.”

“Don’t try to fight me! You’re a father, you should know- Wait, what?”

Jeongguk’s lip twitches up into a weary smile. “I said okay, Y/N. I’ve never liked how freely my people wave around their weapons, anyway. I’ll make the announcement in the morning. Anything else?”

“Um-uh.” You’re caught off guard, leaning away from the desk hesitantly. How could this man, who was smiling at you gently and agreeing on how to better raise his daughter with you, be the same man that allegedly strangled half of the Son mob a few years ago? His tired face looked too young for any and everything you know he must have done. “No, Jeon. No, I think that’s it.”

“Very well, Y/N. You’re welcome to stay the night, if you’d like. I’ll still pay you for the hours.”

You turn to leave, ignoring the little goodnight! he calls after you. Both of you know you won’t accept the check he leaves on the refrigerator in the morning. But you also know that Taehyung is the only other person who knows your bank account, and that it’s no coincidence when deposits are entered the days after you care for Surin.

“S’daddy home?” Surin slurs when you accidentally nudge her awake while crawling under her sheets. She immediately huddles into the warmth of your body, snuggling into your arms with a content little sigh. It’s hard to believe she’s so young sometimes when she’s already experienced so much. You don’t know the circumstances of Jeongguk destroying his old life to move to Gangnam, but you do know that whatever it is, Surin was still feeling the effects without understanding why.

“Yes,” you say, smoothing your fingers through her dark hair. She hums happily, body heavy in your arms as sleep tugs on her. “He’ll say hi in the morning, okay?”

You don’t sleep very well that night, but Surin doesn’t wake once and you consider that a small victory. Despite Jeongguk being home, you still help her get ready for school, carrying her in your arms down the stairs and walking into Jeongguk dismissing a meeting of what looks like almost all of his men in the living room. Taehyung’s eyes light up at the sight of Surin, and she giggles shyly, hiding her face in your neck.

Jeongguk’s demeanor shifts instantaneously, his frown disappearing into an enamored smile when Surin reaches for him. You swallow, feeling uncomfortable as you stand to the side. Jeongguk kisses Surin’s nose and then peppers her cheeks with kisses as she squeals happily, begging you to let her skip school to spend time with her dad.

The teachers at Surin’s school know you by now, but they don’t know you properly. They think you’re Jimin’s fiancée, soon to be his wife in the upcoming months. You’d blanched when Jimin introduced you as such the first day you picked Surin up from school with him, but he’d explained it was the easiest way for you to gain the trust of the administration without raising any red flags.

“Won’t we have to get married now?” You’d asked, as Jimin began to drive you home.

“Nah. Surin only has another year or so in this school, and then she moves up. We’ll tell those administrators that we’re already married. Seokjin is an expert forger, he can get us the proper paperwork.” The- if you’re still here in a year, went unsaid by both of you.

Jimin’s plan had worked perfectly, and now your presence was never questioned at Surin’s school. When you dropped her off, her teacher, a pretty young woman by the name of Soojung, waved at you, and when you picked her up, the principal always shook your hand. Still, you kept your eyes and ears open, and always scanned the grounds of the school whenever you were on them. If there were any new faces, you made a note of them. If anyone was missing, you tried to connect that to someone from your memories. At times, it seemed a little outrageous to you, feeling paranoid and checking over your shoulder every day, but if it ensured Surin’s safety, then it wasn’t questionable at all.

Today, you’re waiting outside of Surin’s school on an unusually warm Friday afternoon. Jeongguk had called you late last night asking for the help. He had a “meeting” this afternoon and required you to watch her until he was able to get home. When the bell rings, hundreds of young students storm out the front doors, and you keep your eyes peeled for Surin.

“Eonnie!” Surin comes charging out the door nearest to her classroom and launches herself into your waiting arms.

“Hi, kid,” you greet, a grin on your lips as you nudge your nose against hers. “How was school?”

“Good! We made pasta art.” She shows you the picture she’d been holding in one hand, unfolding it to reveal a picture of a fish made out of macaroni and tiny pom-poms glued to the paper. “Do you think daddy will like it?”

You brush flyaway hairs away from Surin’s face. “I’m sure he’s going to love it-”

“Miss Y/N?”

You look up at the voice, finding a woman smiling kindly at you from a few meters away. She was dressed smartly, in a black pencil skirt and fitted blue blouse, dark hair pinned away from her hair.

You adjust Surin on your hip. “Uh, yes?”

She holds out her hand, speaking as you hesitantly shake it. “I don’t believe we’ve been properly introduced since you began showing your face around here. My name is Sowon, the vice principal, I’ve been here for about two years.”

“Nice to finally meet you,” you say, hoping your smile looks more sincere than it felt. “Surin talks highly of her teacher, so I’m glad to see the hospitality runs deep.”

“Who is Surin’s teacher again?”

“Miss Soojung.”

“A lovely young woman, don’t you think?”

You nod. Surin’s playing with the end of your ponytail, whisper-asking if you can take her home yet. “She is very pretty.”

“And an excellent teacher, I’ve heard. Surin is in good hands.”

“Thank you.”

On the subway ride home, Surin busts out her coloring books and pencils to practice her coloring. You keep a hand on her back, staring out the window and watching the grungy walls as they pass. It’s five stops from Surin’s school to the stop closest to Jeongguk’s estate, a trip that sometimes takes a long time if there’s congestion. Today, the subway is pretty empty; an elderly man reading the newspaper, a man in a suit glaring at his phone, a teenage girl talking loudly to what sounds like her father, and-

“Taehyung?”

A man at the end of the subway car jolts, pulling his hat further down his face, but it’s too late. Irritation prickles along your skin, jaw locking as Taehyung chances another glance at you, smiling sheepishly when he sees that you’ve spotted him.

“Uncle Tae!”

“Dammit, Taehyung, get over here.”

Taehyung moves slowly, shuffling his feet and keeping his head hung until he reaches you, smartly choosing to sit on Surin’s other side and not directly next to you. Surin seems to register the tension electrifying the air, and instead of asking Taehyung to color with her like you had expected, she goes back to drawing quietly.

“Hi, love-”

“What the hell are you doing here Tae?” You snap, trying to keep your voice down. “Are you tailing me?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t fucking lie to me, Tae- wait.” The east with which he answers catches you off guard, your voice falling silent and eyebrows furrowing. “Why are you and Jeon being so truthful lately?”

Taehyung shrugs. You notice Surin’s got her hand linked with his. “I can’t speak for Jeon, obviously, but you’re my sister and you deserve the truth when it’s applicable. Jeon assigned a tail for you as soon as you agreed to work for him. The person varies based on availability.”

“God dammit, why does he want me followed?”

“You’ve gotten yourself mixed up with someone dangerous, love. He’s just doing his part to keep you safe.”

“I can keep myself safe, Tae. I don’t need a thug following my every move.”

The subway comes to a rocky stop. You stand, collecting Surin’s things into her backpack. When you don’t pick Surin up, Taehyung takes her hand and follows you off the subway, your arms crossed and expression purposefully neutral.

“Y/N,” Taehyung warns as the three of you make your way up Jeongguk’s driveway. He’d stayed quiet with you, but spoken adamantly with Surin about the giraffes at the local zoo, and whether there would be time this weekend to visit them. “Whatever you’re thinking, whatever you’re planning, don’t do it.”

“Who says I’m planning anything?”

Jeongguk’s sitting at the table in the kitchen when you finally get inside. Surin’s absolutely ecstatic to see him, dropping her backpack and sprinting to his side, climbing up onto his back as Jeongguk laughs and pokes at her side. Finally she settles in the chair next to him, and Taehyung brings over her folder of homework, and after a moment it’s father and daughter working side by side.

Jeongguk glances up, and seems surprised to see you still standing in the threshold of the kitchen. “Will you be joining us for dinner, Y/N?”

“Why do you have a tail on me?”

He falters, his easy smile slipping from his features into the detached expression you were coming to expect from him. He sighs, making a show of putting his pens down with the utmost care. “Now is not a good time to bring this up, Y/N-”

“Oh, it isn’t?” Poisonous sarcasm drips from every word cascading from your lips. Jeongguk’s expression darkens slightly, but it’s clear he’s keeping a hold on himself for Surin’s sake. “When would be a better time, Mister Jeon? When you’re coming home covered in blood? Or how about when you come stumbling in the middle of the night with your gun still smoking? Or-”

Jeongguk stands abruptly, nearly knocking his chair over before he’s stalking toward you, curling a hand around your bicep to pull you from the kitchen. “Keep an eye on Surin, Kim,” he calls over his shoulder.

“Let go of me,” you hiss, struggling against his hold as he leads you to an adjacent hallway. “I swear to God, Jeon, I’ll-”

“You’ll what, Y/N?” Jeongguk shoves your arm away from him, glaring at you fiercely. The light from the setting sun reflects into the room, casting his face into dramatic relief and sharpening his features into something terrifying. Your breath catches in your throat. “As far as I recall, only one of us here knows fifteen different ways to kill a man. Only one of us here has a gun always on their person, or a knife tucked somewhere even a thorough search couldn’t find. Only one of us here is wanted dead by no less than a dozen people, Y/N, so tell me. You will do what?”

You don’t have an answer. You never had one and Jeongguk knows that. You’re standing before a Jeon, backed up against the wall of one of the most powerful men in all of Seoul. The house is silent around you, no sign of Jeongguk’s men, no noise coming from the kitchen, and you briefly worry that Surin might have heard the dangerous tone her father was capable of taking on. Jeongguk was staring at you with flames licking his irises and threats dancing on the tip of his tongue when he should be spending his afternoon with her. Your hands curl into fists, but both of you know that nothing will come from the gesture.

“Why are you tailing me?”

“You’re a smart young woman, Y/N. Figure it out.”

“I’m not in the mood to play games, Jeon.” You attempt to put some distance between the two of you, but only succeed in knocking into the side of a painting hanging from the wall. Jeongguk settles it. “Call your men off of me.”

Jeongguk shakes his head. “So long as you work for me, Y/N, I’ll keep you under my watch.”

“No.” The same bout of anger you’d felt on the train resurfaces, and you have to physically keep yourself from biting out what you say. “No. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”

“Are you?” Jeongguk raises an eyebrow. “Tell me, do you know how to incapacitate a man coming at you with two guns? Or how to shake a tail when it’s not one of my trusted men? Better yet, do you know how to lose a tail, disarm a gunman, and get my daughter to safety before anyone has a chance to act or call for backup? If you do, by the way, you really should update your resume.”

“What the fuck is your point, Jeon?”

“My point is that you work for me now, Y/N, and that puts a very large target on your back. Men who want me dead will be interested in who you are to me-”

You snort, unable to help yourself. “You mean nothing to me.”

Jeongguk glares at you pointedly. “As you’ve made exceptionally clear. However, you also care for my daughter, and I value Surin’s life more than I value my own. So long as you work for me, you will be under my protection. If you’re unhappy with that, well then, you know where the front door is.”

“You’d ask me to leave?” You ask slowly.

“Only if I find that you don’t place Surin as your top priority when you’re here.”

“Fuck you, Jeon.” You mutter, rubbing at your temples with both hands. A dull pounding was beginning in the back of your head, and you wanted nothing more than to go back to your apartment, down a few shots of whatever cheap tequila you had left, and fall asleep for three days. “I didn’t sign up for this shit.”

“Yes, you did,” Jeongguk says softly. When you open your eyes again, he isn’t looking at you. Instead, Jeongguk’s looking back towards the kitchen, where Surin can be heard laughing exceptionally loudly, his smile small and fond and heartbreaking. “You signed up for it the moment you agreed to stay Surin’s as nanny.”

“I’m leaving.”

“Have a good night, then.”

For the first time you don’t say goodbye to Surin before grabbing your bag and leaving. The front door is too heavy to slam behind you, which was disappointing to say the least, and you stalk past Taehyung’s car without a second glance. From the corner of your eye you see Jimin trailing after you at a pace far enough away not to raise suspicion. You throw your middle finger over your shoulder without a word and wait for him at the subway turnstile.

“Y/N, get up.”

“No.” You’re whining and you know it, but this is the first day you’ve gotten to go to bed early in almost two weeks and, sure, maybe seven at night was a little too early to go to bed, but you’d almost been asleep.

“Come on, Y/N,” your best friend, Hyorin, is laughing as she tries to shake you awake. She pokes at your shoulder, sitting on your legs to keep you from moving around. “Come on, babe, I haven’t seen you in forever! If you’re not in class you’re not here, and honestly I can’t go into the library again looking for you. The librarian thinks I’m weird.”

“You are weird,” you say, turning halfway onto your back to glare at her. “How did you get in here, anyway?”

“Taehyung-oppa let me in.”

“Tae was here?”

She nods, drumming an unheard beat against your kneecap. “He said something about dropping off pizza roles.”

Dammit. He knew you couldn’t stay mad at him whenever he brought you food. And not that you were truly ever mad at him, but you were a little irritated with the secrets he had to keep. And it had been almost three weeks since Jeongguk called you for Surin, and truthfully you missed the young girl. You found yourself constantly wondering who was putting her to bed, and whether or not she felt comfortable with them. It had been long enough at her side that you were becoming aware of her moods, of the way her face would either light up or fall depending on which of Jeongguk’s men walked through the door. It had come to a point where you’d begun texting Taehyung each night for the names of who helped her, and Taehyung promised that Jimin did it as often as he was able.

You push yourself into a seated position, staring into Hyorin’s bright blue eyes. “Do I have to come out?”

Hyorin nods enthusiastically. “Absolutely. It’s Mingyu’s birthday and his girlfriend booked an open bar at some club. How often are you able to get drunk for free, Y/N?”

“Whenever I ask Tae to bring me stuff?”

“Doesn’t count. Now get up.”

“I’m not showering.”

Hyorin laughs, skipping off to your closet to pick something for you to wear. “At least throw in some dry shampoo. You got a rat’s nest, babe.”

You don’t clean your hair out of spite, instead choosing to pull it into another ponytail and be done with it. Hyorin’s outfit is innocent enough, a pair of dark jeans, a sheer black blouse and an undershirt, and a pair of boots. The weather was starting to warm up, but you’re always been a little cold, and you appreciate her remembering that.

The club she’s taking you to is called Inferno, or something equally as stupid. You don’t pay much attention as she drives there, mind wandering between which of your friends would be there, the amount of pizza roles you’d probably eat in the morning while in the throes of your hangover, and whether or not your tail for the night had seen you leave. When Hyorin’s crossing into Hongdae, you’re beginning to wonder why the two of you didn’t just take a taxi, especially if she was planning on drinking as much as you were.

“Come on,” Hyorin says, after parking the car a block or so away from the club. The Club Inferno sign was outlined in red and orange, a few crudely drawn flames lining some of the windows. It was so expected it was almost funny. “Mingyu and the others are waiting in line.”

Standing in line, your suspicions are confirmed when you don’t spot anyone watching you. Either your tail was keeping his distance or no one was assigned to keep an eye on you tonight.

“Y/N,” Luna whispers, tugging on your sleeve. “The bouncer’s pretty cute, don’t you think?”

“Hm?” You follow her gaze to the front of the line, stepping forward automatically as the line shifts, watching as the bouncer lets in a small group. His brown hair was gelled back, eyes disappearing as he smiles a painfully familiar smile- “Jimin?”

Luna looks confused, glancing between you and Jimin. “Do you know him?”

“What-? Ah, no. I was thinking of what I want to name my daughter.”

“I thought you liked the name-”

“Y/N!” Jimin spots you then, despite your oh-so clever attempt to block your face from his view by hiding it behind your shirt. You grimace as he starts waving you toward the front, but even though you dig your heels in and try to melt into the wall, Hyorin and Luna realize Jimin’s gesturing to you, and both grab one of your wrists to pull you to the front of the line. Jimin smiles kindly as your group arrives, ignoring the indignant grumbling coming from the other people waiting in line. He says, “You guys can go right in.”

Hyorin and Luna hurriedly thank him, giggling loudly as Mingyu and Kihyun lead them into the club. You hang back for a second, glaring at Jimin with your arms crossed.

Jimin’s smile fades slightly. “Y/N-”

“Please.” You interrupt, raising a hand. “Please do not confirm what I’m thinking.”

Jimin nods his head toward the club. “Go enjoy yourself, Y/N. Make sure the bartender knows that anything you order is on us, okay?”

You ignore the red light word in that suggestion, turning on your heel to walk inside, and it’s exactly like any other club you’ve been to before. The hallway leading into the main room was nicer; you’d admit that, with what looked like song lyrics painted on the walls instead of mysterious stains and glow in the dark paint. The club itself was packed, as expected of a Friday night. Bodies move and sway to a remix song playing through high-powered speakers; people crowd the three- three- bars within the room, and couches line one side of the room. Stairs lead away from the dance floor to a second floor, and you find that instantly you have a headache.

You find your friends at the bar against the back wall, having waited for you before taking the first shot for Mingyu’s birthday. The bartender looks vaguely familiar, but you think nothing of it as you take another shot, and then another before you’re pleasantly buzzed enough to accept Hyorin’s invitation to dance.

Laughing on the dance floor, allowing the heavy bass of the dance songs to guide your movements, you forget the stress of the last couple months. You let yourself forget about Jeongguk and his reputation, about Taehyung nearly joining the Zhangs, about Jimin being here, about Namjoon standing by the stairs, but not about Surin. Even as you take the shot Mingyu brings you, you don’t let her leave your mind.

“I’m glad you came tonight, Y/N,” Mingyu’s saying sometime later. Your head is a little heavy, but you’re having a better time than you had anticipated. Mingyu’s hands are on your waist, yours around his neck as you let him lead for the ballad playing through the speakers. “We haven’t seen much of each other lately.”

Your smile feels a little forced, attention divided between him and the movement at the other side of the club. Namjoon was whispering into Jimin’s ear, and then they were trading positions. Yugyeom was sitting halfway up the staircase, and following the path you see Bogum at the top of the stairs, and Jeongguk through the glass window to one of the rooms on the second floor.

“No,” you whisper.

Mingyu says, “No?” And your attention is brought back to him.

“I mean happy birthday.”

He chuckles. “Odd way to say happy birthday.”

“It’s French, I think.”

Before Mingyu can say anything, Jeongguk’s glancing at you and a hand is tugging on your arm. You swallow back your surprise, the warm feeling in your stomach shifting into annoyance as Hyorin grins at you. She doesn’t give you a chance to inquire into her wickedly excited expression as she takes your arm and Mingyu’s and begins dragging both of you to the stairs.

“Hyorin, where are we going?” Mingyu asks, looking your way for answers, but you’re not willing to give them.

Hyorin’s grin only widens. “We’ve been invited into VIP.”

“No,” you say, trying to wrestle your hand out of her grip. Jeongguk’s disappeared from the window upstairs, and you would like nothing more than to crawl back into bed and pretend this night never happened. You are definitely not drunk enough for this. “No, Hyorin, I’m feeling sick. I’m really drunk I want to go ho-”

“I know your limit babe, come on! How many times will this happen to you?”

In Jeongguk’s favorite terms: too many now that you work for him.

“I really don’t think this is a good idea-!”

Your protests fall on deaf ears as Hyorin meets back up with Luna, Kihyun and the other girls you had arrived with earlier. Hyorin keeps a firm hand on your back as she all but pushes you up the stairs. Yugyeom winks at you, still leaning against the railing. The walk up the stairs feels like a journey up a mountain, your head pounding and heart dreading what was to come.

Hoseok meets your group at the top of the stairs, smiling kindly. He tries to catch your eye, but you purposefully look away. “I see you all got Mister Park’s message, hm?”

“Can we ask what this is for?” Mingyu asks, and you’re vindictively glad to hear a bitter tone in his voice.

“The boss just wanted to show a little appreciation for such good customers,” Hoseok says. “And we hear there’s a birthday tonight! Come, the best champagne is in the private room.”

Hoseok directs your group into a room to the right, Luna and Jihae immediately giggling at the sight of the poles on either side of the room. Jeongguk slips in just behind your group before Hoseok gets the door closed, balancing three bottles of champagne in his hands. Everyone disperses, but you stay close to the wall, watching as Luna and Jihae cuddle up next to Hoseok on one of the couches, Hyorin trying her luck by sitting next to Jeongguk. You snort, imagining her face if you told her that was definitely a gun in Jeongguk’s pocket. Even Mingyu and Kihyun, whom you’d expected to stay mildly annoyed all night, were putty in the hands of the pretty girls in the room.

Jeongguk raises an eyebrow, pouring out champagne for everyone’s empty glasses, and you take that as a challenge.

There’s a desk in one corner of the room, carved of expensive oak and blissfully unoccupied. Your friends giggles and laughter are nearly as loud as the music playing outside, muffled by the thick door, but Luna’s attempt at sticking her hand down Hoseok’s pants and Kihyun’s face buried in a stripper’s neck are the least of your concerns as you dig around the desk, finally locating a pad of sticky notes and a pen.

Walking swiftly, you shove the items at Jeongguk’s face, nearly making him drop his glass. “Park,” you say, irritated with using Jeongguk’s fake name again, but the last thing you wanted was word getting out as to who these people were.

“Y/N,” Jeongguk says, staring up at you in confusion. Hyorin’s still attached to his arm, but he gently breaks her hold with a kind smile. “Excuse us for a minute, won’t you?” She doesn’t go far, only scooting to the end of the sofa while glaring brutal daggers at you. Oh well. “What’s this about, Y/N?”

“Write down every establishment you own in this country.” You say, waving the pen in his face.

Jeongguk laughs, and the amusement painted on his pretty features only serves to infuriate you further. “Why would I do that?”

“So I can be sure never to visit them.”

“You’re being ridiculous,” Jeongguk says, keeping his voice low and calm. Hyorin was still watching and by now Luna and Mingyu were looking, too. One word spoken too loudly, and you’d have to come up with a plan to get out without revealing how you knew anyone in this room. “You’re welcome here.”

“I don’t want to be. Je-Park, who’s watching Surin tonight?”

Jeongguk’s eyes soften imperceptibly. “Taehyung is.”

You breathe a sigh of relief, sitting heavily onto the couch. If everything were to go wrong tonight, at least Tae had Surin. “Where’s the tail?”

“Split as soon as he saw you were heading here.”

“And-”

“Sorry, do you know each other?” Hyorin reclaims her previous spot, aiming a sweet smile at Jeongguk that you’d learned how to read through years ago. She looks between you and Jeongguk expectantly. In her eyes, you were making moves on her target for the night. If only you could tell her that was the last thing on your mind. “You look a little familiar with each other, is all? Y/N, is this a friend you’ve been hiding from us?”

You make a face, ignoring the way Jeongguk rolls his eyes at you. “No, Hyorin, it’s nothing like that-”

“She’s my nanny,” Jeongguk cuts in with a smug smile.

“You asshole-!”

Hyorin looks disappointed, but not terribly so. “Is that like… a sex thing?”

Jeongguk chokes on his sip of champagne, properly shocked and looking nervous as he glances at you, grinning. He made his bed. From across the room, Hoseok laughs too loudly for whatever Luna was whispering to him. “No, no it is nothing of the sorts. Y/N cares for my daughter.”

“Does Taehyung-oppa know you got a job?” Hyorin asks.

You purse your lips, carefully contemplating how to answer. Both people staring at you knew bits and pieces about you, but neither knew enough. To avoid suspicion, there was really only one answer you could give. “Yes.”

“And he’s okay with that? Considering-”

“Hyorin, don’t.” You snap, harsher than you’d intended. Her entire body tenses, lips falling shut as she appraises you. Tension swims uncomfortably between the two of you, Jeongguk stuck in the middle and positively confused. Hyorin holds your gaze for a few more long seconds before she nods.

“I should get Mingyu back to his girl, anyway,” Hyorin says, sullen. “Thank you for inviting us up here, Jeongguk-oppa.”

“Now, see?” Jeongguk says quietly, as Hyorin’s reminding Mingyu of his girlfriend waiting downstairs. Everyone else remains unbothered. By now, the shots you’d taken earlier in the night had all but worn off, your headache returning tenfold instead. “Why can’t you be that comfortable with me?”

“She doesn’t put my life at risk.”

Jeongguk’s smile falls, concern lining the corners of his face. He puts his glass on the coffee table, and you belatedly realize he hadn’t poured you a glass. You don’t look at him as he tries to search your face for clues, letting your gaze stay on a slight discoloration of the carpet. “Y/N-”

“I should go, Jeongguk.”

He nods. “I’ll drive-” At the sight of your glare, Jeongguk hurriedly backpedals. “I’ll have Jimin drive you home.”

“Thanks.”

The drive home is silent. You spend the entire time feeling bothered by the fact that you were bothered by what had happened tonight. Truthfully, you shouldn’t be feeling any way about it, but the uncomfortable feeling in your chest refused to lift even as Jimin bade you goodnight with a bright smile or when you got home to find Taehyung asleep on your couch.

Jeongguk hadn’t written down his businesses, and you were beginning to wonder if keeping with this job was as terrible an idea as Taehyung had initially suggested.

In the last few weeks of Surin’s classes, the weather reaches record highs and makes both drop-offs in the morning and pick-ups in the afternoon nearly unbearable. It didn’t help that the subway was subject to the outside weather, and if it was warm outside, it was stifling while waiting for a train.

There are fewer parents waiting outside today, likely due to the increase in the number of play dates that accompany the lure of summer. You’ve made a note to talk to Surin today and ask her a few important questions. One, ask her why she was afraid of the cleaning service. Two, ask which of Jeongguk’s men scared her most so you could have Jimin keep them far away from her. And three, ask her of any friends she had so you could set up play dates for the summer.

You stand under one of the trees in the courtyard, the little shade not doing much against the intolerable heat, but at least you wouldn’t burn. Save for the murmur of parents talking, the air is still and silent. Your preliminary scan hadn’t shown anything out of the ordinary-

“Say one word and I’ll shoot.”

Body stiffening, all of the breath in your lungs leaves you in one fell swoop. Something conspicuous and obvious presses into your side, hidden in a coat angled just above your hip, and your heart stutters several times. To your side, someone in a long, light coat stands next to you, but far enough behind you that you can’t see their face from your peripherals. Thick boots and a raspy voice, the man shoves the gun that much harder against your side.

“Now that I have your attention,” the man laughs, keeping his voice low so only you could hear. With every word he says, you swear your heart skips in fear. The sweat lining your brow has nothing to do with the heat. You feel death knocking at your door, and briefly, Jeongguk’s face passes through your thoughts, but only long enough for you to curse his name. “When you answer me, keep your voice down, or answer nonverbally. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” you breathe, voice barely audible over your heavy breathing.

“Calm the fuck down,” he snaps. “Make a scene and I’ll kill you. I don’t give a fuck about Jeon’s newest pet.”

Swallowing is drastically more difficult than it has ever been before. “You know me?”

The barrel of the gun is shoved against your hipbone, and you bite back your noise of terror. “Did I say you could speak? Leave. Leave Jeon’s company or leave the country, don’t matter to me. Jeon’s dangerous-”

“Says the man with a gun at my side.”

“I will shoot you, girl,” the man growls. It’s feeble, but you hear the sound of the safety being clicked off, and any bravado you’d garnered is gone in a flash. “Jeon shouldn’t be in power right now. That fuckin’ child is sitting on a castle of sand, ready to destroy everything we put into it. Do you know what that means, girl?” You shake your head, nails digging harshly into your palms, but this is no dream. “It means that castle is about to crumble. And do you know what happens when royalty dies?”

“No-”

“Hostages are taken,” the man sneers. From the corner of your eye, you can see he’s staring at the school and thinking about the only person in that school who’s connected to Jeongguk. “And hostages die.”

“Don’t touch her-”

“Shut up!” He shoves the gun into your stomach with enough force to have you wheezing, mind reeling and body trembling, but you remember his warning, and try to look as inconspicuous as possible. Only a few more minutes until the bell would ring- “Heed my warning. I’d hate for two pretty young things to die because of Jeon. But of course, there are… other uses for a girl like you around here.” You bite your tongue; eyes squeezed shut as you refuse to react to his threat. “Breathe a word of this to Jeon, and I’ll know. Trust me when I say I won’t hesitate to kill you on the side of the street. Such a shame that hit and runs are on the rise, isn’t it?”

The bell rings and young kids race out of the doors to find their parents, to find the safety they expect in the adults in their lives. The man at your side retreats, but he only goes so far as the other side of the courtyard where he could keep an eye on you if need be.

Surin comes running out the front door, grinning widely as she crashes into your legs. It takes you too long of a second to compose your expression, but Surin doesn’t seem to notice anything off when you take her into your arms. You wave at Soojung and Sowon at the doors and walk quickly down the block, well aware of the man, whose face was covered by a hat, trailing behind you. You curse quietly. Of all days for Jeongguk not to have one of his men tail you.

“Eonnie?” Surin asks, as you’re waiting for the train to arrive. “Can I tell you something when we get home?”

“Of course,” you say, willing your heart to settle back down. The man had disappeared into one of the crowds a couple blocks away, but that didn’t mean he was gone. “I want to talk to you about a few things, too.”

Despite the heat, Surin tucks her head beneath your chin during the ride home. You keep her on your lap the entire time, arms locked securely around her frame, and at every stop you watch each person that steps onto or off of the train.

“We did pasta art again,” Surin’s saying once you step off of the train. “I made a dog this time, but I don’t know if I want to bring it back to daddy. I want it to look like the dog daddy wants, but I don’t know what that dog looks like. Jinyoung says dogs all look the same when they’re made of pasta, so I punched him.”

“You punched him?” You ask, wrenched back to the present task of carrying Surin up the driveway. The guards knew you enough to open the gates when you showed up.

“No,” Surin giggles. You sigh in relief; you hadn’t been sure how to tell Jeongguk of that. “But you were distracted. Are you okay, eonnie?”

“Yeah,” you lie. “Yeah, I’m okay. Finals week is kicking my ass, that’s all.”

“You said a bad word!”

You find yourself smiling, ruffling Surin’s hair affectionately. “Don’t tell your dad, okay?”

There are an unusual number of cars in the driveway this afternoon, but the estate is motionless when you get inside. You hear voices coming from Jeongguk’s office and swallow back your nerves, knocking loudly on the door despite Surin’s protests. The voices cut off inside the office, and then Jimin’s opening the door, looking confused when he sees you.

“Y/N?”

“Jiminie!”

“Hey bug,” Jimin greets Surin with a kiss to her forehead. She reaches for him as you adjust her on your hip, but Jimin frowns. “Your dad’s a little busy right now, it might not be the best time-”

“Hyung, who is it?”

“It’s, ah,” Jimin glances back into the room. “It’s Surin and Y/N, boss.”

“You can let them in,” Jeongguk’s saying. “This isn’t some prison.”

Once inside the room, Surin makes a beeline for Jeongguk, who happily accepts her onto his lap. Instead of the kisses you’ve come to expect when Jeongguk gets to see his daughter, he props his chin on the top of her head and looks at you. Appearances, and all that.

There must be upwards of twenty people in Jeongguk’s office, all of them staring at you with various expressions of confusion or disgust. Taehyung waves at you from where he’s standing behind Jeongguk’s chair. The fear and uncertainty you’d been feeling comes rolling back, crashing into you like an uncontrollable wave, and the neutral face you’d tried your hardest to keep slips slightly. Around the room, the men you were closest to exchange concerned looks.

Taehyung says, “Y/N, love-”

“Is this a staff meeting?” You try to joke, but your voice sounds hollow even to your own ears. Jeongguk frowns, smoothing Surin’s hair so it doesn’t tickle his nose.

“Not quite,” Jeongguk says quietly. Then, he seems to remember his place, and his eyes harden. “I called enough of my men because I’ve been noticing movement. I expected the Zhangs to take control of the power struggle in Ilsan, but there’s a family that’s been stirring shit up in Myeongdong, except I don’t know who the fuck they are-”

Surin nudges Jeongguk’s arm. “Language, daddy.”

“Sorry, sweetheart.” Jeongguk kisses the top of her head, and you bite back the comment waiting on the tip of your tongue to let you take Surin out of the room. She had her arms around Jeongguk’s middle, her eyes downcast, and you really didn’t want to take her away from her dad. “Anyway, I’m going to be deploying some of my men to do rounds around Ilsan and Myeongdong, but also to Gwangju. I need to see what I can manipulate, and find if anyone’s planning anything against us.”

“I may be able to help with that,” you say into the resulting silence.

Jeongguk’s gaze is suddenly heated when he glances at you. “Elaborate. Now.”

You take a moment to compose yourself, briefly remembering the man’s threat to your safety if you were to tell Jeongguk about him. But he was one man, and Jeongguk had dozens to employ. “A man threatened me outside of Surin’s school today. I don’t know whom he belonged to,” you say, relaying the conversation that had been playing in your head for the better part of an hour.

When you finish, the room is sickly silent and Jeongguk’s fist is curled on the top of his desk. He speaks, thinly veiled fury in his voice. “Bogum, take Surin to the gardens to play.”

Surin pouts. “But daddy-”

“I’ll fetch you soon, Surin. Please go with Bogum.” Jeongguk waits until the door shuts behind Bogum, Jeongguk snaps, “Out! Everyone out, now! Except for you, Y/N, everyone get the fuck out of my sight!”

“Boss,” Jimin tries, hands raised to placate Jeongguk. Jeongguk hadn’t moved from his chair, but his entire body was tense like a coil poised to explode, or a bomb ready to destroy everything in its path. “We need to-”

“We will discuss the ramifications of this later,” Jeongguk hisses. “Now. Get the fuck out of my office!”

The door closes behind Taehyung, the last person from the room, and Jeongguk hurls one of the books on the shelves at the opposite wall. It doesn’t stop there. Jeongguk throws any book he can get his hands on, chucking them at whichever wall he chooses in that second, before moving on to things like the expensive looking paperweight on his desk, or the ornate clock nestled on one of the shelves. He curses the entire time, hair falling messily against his forehead as he curses at Surin’s school, at his own men, at the man who threatened you, and more that you can’t catch.

“Jeon, that’s enough,” you say. Jeongguk shatters a lamp on the floor, and you flinch. You knew he was dangerous, but that fact had never seemed quite as pertinent before this moment. The look in his eyes is wild when you finally get his attention. “Jeongguk! Fucking quit it!”

“Her school,” Jeongguk spits, stalking around his desk to kick at one of the chairs in the room. “They were at her fucking school! And I don’t know who the fuck they are!”

“Jeongguk, stop! Stop!” You grab one of his wrists, holding on with both hands as he tries to wrench himself away from you. “This isn’t going to solve anything!”

Jeongguk whirls on his heel, all but crowding you against the nearest wall. He’s breathing heavily, lips curled and hair a mess. “Did you see his face?”

“No,” you say, stroking your thumb along the back of Jeongguk’s hand. His free hand was pulled into a fist against the wall by your head. You try to remember any of the techniques for calming people down, try to remember what you and Taehyung had shared, but it all seems so futile in this moment.

“Fucking- dammit. Who the fuck was supposed to be keeping an eye on you today?”

“I don’t know-”

“Could you recognize his voice?”

“I- probably, Jeongguk, but why-”

“I’m going to fucking kill him. Kill him and the entire family he works for-”

“Calm down!” You grasp Jeongguk’s face in your hands, forcing him to look at you. He blinks rapidly, mouth losing some of the tension. His shoulders slump slightly, but he doesn’t look away from you. “This isn’t going to help anything, Jeongguk.”

Jeongguk looks pained, blinking away the impending wetness in his eyes. “They were at her school, Y/N. Her school!”

“I know. I know, Jeongguk. And you’re going to make sure he doesn’t lay a hand on her, make sure no one gets to her in that school, right?” Jeongguk turns his face into your touch, and something heavy stirs uneasily in your chest. “The last thing Surin needs right now is her father throwing a temper tantrum in his office.”

“But- Y/N, they were-”

“At her school. But she probably heard all of the commotion, Jeongguk. She’s probably terrified. Go to her. We can make a plan later on, after you’ve calmed down.”

Jeongguk doesn’t move for almost ten minutes, still leaning heavily against your hands. His eyes fall shut, shoulders pulling taut again before he finally sighs and leans away from you, looking wearier than you can ever remember. The look in his eyes when he opens them again remind you of how Surin looks when she zones out- when she thinks you’re not looking.

“Y/N.” Jeongguk speaks quietly, carefully. “Thank you.”

You chew the inside of your cheek, heart thudding erratically for too many reasons to attempt to name at the moment. “For?”

Jeongguk smiles. It’s small and it’s tired, but it’s there. “I’ll tell you another day.”

Jeongguk leaves the office, and a few minutes later you do as well. He finds Surin in the gardens, playing kickball with Jimin and Taehyung and races to join them, letting Surin tackle him to the ground with extra enthusiasm. The threat hasn’t been forgotten, but you tell yourself not to worry. Jeongguk would do anything to keep his daughter safe.

When frantic knocking on your door breaks the silence of the night, you immediately fear the worst. Stumbling out of your bed, you trip over dirty clothes on the floor and desperately try to wake yourself up. Fury and confusion and fear fight for precedence in your mind, visions of Taehyung, bloody and hurt; or Surin, desperate and crying; or of Jeongguk, broken beyond belief-

It takes too long and no time at all to reach your front door, your fingers shaking as you undo the locks. The knocking still hasn’t ceased, and if anything, it’s only gotten louder.

The name, “Taehyung-” trips over your tongue as you wrench the door open, but it’s not your brother waiting for you on the other side.

Jeongguk stands in the hallway, bruising evident on his cheek even in the shitty lighting of the complex. Questions begin and die on your tongue when you see he’s carrying Surin, who looks like she’s fallen asleep again in his arms. He’s out of breath, glancing over his shoulder every other second. He holds his gun in his other hand.

“Jeong-”

“I’m sorry,” Jeongguk blurts, ushering Surin into your arms. Her tiny backpack looks full. “I’m sorry, Y/N. Please-”

Jeongguk doesn’t finish his thought, backtracking out of your hallway and then running out of sight without another word. Surin shifts a bit in your arms. Your heart is the only thing you can hear besides the ringing in your ears, still resounding in the echo of Jeongguk’s furious knocking.

And there is nothing for you to do but triple-lock your door, tuck Surin into your bed and curl around her tiny frame as you attempt to fall back asleep, worry keeping you awake until the sun begins to rise.

#jeongguk scenarios #jungkook scenarios #jeon jungkook #jeon jeongguk #bangtan scenarios #my writing #fic: dmd #eee i finally got motivation for this #i'm not planning on making this too many parts #so this chapter serves as a lot of buildup #please tell me what you think!!

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