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#:im not upset i just dont want this to become a thing ya know:
jordan-the-pious · 3 months
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Why do you refuse to help those in your flock captured in the hands of a wolf? Even if devoted to your church you refuse to protect those in the grip of bailey, who plan's to give their body's away to evil and sin if unable to pay. You work as a hypocrite in the lords home for turning your back on innocent souls who reach out their hands for protection.
You seem to be confused my dear. There is room at the temple for all who are worthy. We hold a vigil once a week at 8 pm on Sundays, where initiates who have sufficiently proven their grace and devotion to the temple may undertake the vigil to become fully-fledged members of our order.
I will not say that it is an easy task, but any may do it, should their devotion to the temple be strong enough. Even those who are sullied and have broken their vows are allowed in if they show that they have sufficient drive.
We are a temple my dear. We help the poor and unfortunate, but we are not a charity. Those who need our services need only live by our rules and be remorseful if they fail to do so.
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franciswasteland · 1 month
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TECH!LEO VALDEZ X THEATER KID!READER
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MASTERLIST
Summary: You land the role of Veronica Sawyer in a musical your high school is putting on, and your tech boyfriend tries to be supportive and reassure you when you need it.
Warnings: Highschool!au, Mortal!au,already dating fic, Beware spelling errors, im lowkey dyslexic. I DONT KNOW HOW TO END FICS….
Authors Notes: HIII GUYS IM ACTUALLY REALLY EXCITED TO WRITE THIS I LOVE LEO SO MUCH. ALSO THIS IS PARTLY FOR SOME DISCORD FRIENDS !! Possibly not canon written Leo 😭🙏
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You were in the drama/theater club at your high school, often appearing as the leading or supporting roles in musicals your school would put on in the auditorium. It was amazing, both fun and something you were good at! But what made it even better was one of the tech kids, Leo Valdez—Who was your boyfriend!
A few weeks ago, you scored one of the lead roles—Veronica Sawyer—in a musical your school was putting on called ‘Heathers’. But, there was a rather… intimate scene with another character, Veronica’s love interest, in the show during the song ‘Dead Girl Walking’, and Leo tried to tolerate it and support you the best he could, but it was getting a little unbearable for him.
“Baby…” Leo whined as you ranted to him about your role in the musical, even though you should have been practicing your lines. “Shouldn’t you be, uh, practicing or something?” He didn't want to send you away like that, but he could go on hearing you talk about that scene.
“Sorry, sorry, you’re right. I’ll go practice my lines. Thanks for the reminder. Love you, bye!” You say apologetically, kissing his cheek quickly (If any teacher or adult at the school saw you do that you’d probably get detention.) and running out from backstage where you were talking to Leo as he worked on… Whatever he does.
It was a few hours from the first showing of the show as your high school was doing a morning and afternoon show. You were backstage getting ready, changing into costume, and makeup, making sure you had your lines completely memorized and you could hit each note in the songs—Which you could. Expect you couldn’t help but be a bit worried about this. Sure, you had played so many roles before throughout the years you’ve been in high school, but you were worried about little things, a lot of little things which slowly added up to become one big thing for you to worry about—Making sure you’d sing the school appropriate version of the lyrics, making sure you wouldn’t blank on stage (How embarrassing would that be?!), making sure you were perfect.
Then you got an idea.
There was one person that you knew for sure thought you were perfect. Your boyfriend, Leo! Of course, you’d be able to get reassurance from him! So naturally you ran—Not too fast though, you couldn’t ruin your costume—off from where you were sat to find him.
It didn’t take you long to find Leo, he was exactly where you had expected him to be after all. “Leo!” You called out as you walked up to him, placing one of your hands on his arm so he would turn around to face you. And he in fact did turn around and face you like you had suspected he would.
“What is it?” He asked, sounding confused. He thought you would be getting ready for the musical, not running up to him for a chat. “Did ya miss me that bad you had to stop getting ready to come find me?” He added with a short chuckle, gaining a smile.
“Nono,—Well yes, but that’s not why I came to find you.” You replied, worry practically seeping through your words the more you spoke. Leo noticed almost immediately.
Your hand was still on his arm, Leo put his hand on top of yours. “Wow, I’m hurt.” He teased. “Well then, what is it? Whatcha need?” That was one of the things you loved about Leo; he always seemed to know when you were worried or upset about something, even if he didn’t know how to comfort you.
“I dunno, I guess I’m just nervous about this. I’m scared of messing up on stage.” You admit to him, and Leo seems to immediately understand what you mean. “Oh, don’t worry about it. You’ll do great, trust me.”
Then, when you were finally getting that reassurance from your boyfriend, it was about roughly 15-to-20 minutes until curtain—Until you would be on stage. Oh, brother.
You were feeling a little more better as you rushed back to the backstage area of the auditorium, Leo’s words ringing in your ears. The backstage was suddenly not as easy to navigate as it was before you ran off to find your boyfriend. People—Either in the show themselves or apart of tech like Leo—Were running around, trying to make sure the preparations were all set and everything was ready for the first showing of the musical.
Then you got told by one of the tech team members to get in your place on stage.
After about 2 and a half hours, the morning show of your high schools performance of ‘Heathers The Musical’ was over. You bowed before the audience, sweating, your throat sore and hurting from singing for almost 2 hours straight. At this point, all you could think of was the bottle of water that was waiting for you by your bag backstage.
As soon as the curtain closed, you ran off stage to where you had set your bag in desire of the bottle of water you had gotten before hand. And there it was waiting for you, along with Leo, your boyfriend.
“See? What did I tell you? You did amazing, just like I said you would.” Leo said, wrapping one of his arms around you, seemingly not minding the fact that you were practically covered in sweat.
“Yeah yeah, I know,” You groan in reply. “Just lemme grab my water before you start praising me.” You let out a dry laugh, —Dry to the fact that your throat was now killing you. You reached out your hand for your bottle of water, but Leo grabbed it before you could. You thought he would hold on to it tightly and reach his hand up high, making you reach even farther for it, but he didn’t. Instead, he opened it for you and handed it to you, seemingly recognizing how tired you were after performances.
“You look tired,” Leo mused, knowing exactly where this was going to go. After most shows and performances, you would be tired and feel miserable. So miserable and tired that you would just crash in his arms. “Come here..” He said, opening his arms for you to fall into. You quickly leaned your whole body against him, leaning into his arms.
“Thank you,”
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weixuldo · 10 months
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Enigma// ch 18
anakin x reader
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a/n: shit man, stuff is getting tough! i really didn’t think this fic was gonna b as long as it’s becoming hahaha/ ngl even if ppl r losing interest, im still gonna continue it for me heheh- i really like this story :)
The night gets worse and worse
warnings: cursing, cannon disabled character, insecurity, alcohol abuse, emtephobia (barf and stuff…), DONT DO WHAT ANAKIN DOES PLS LORD, ableist comments
_______________________________
As it does, time went by and you tried to move on.
When school ended you moved in with Ahsoka and split rent; it was nice having your best friend around whenever you needed it, plus the two of you shared groceries so the cost of living was much more affordable than if you had gotten your own place. 
As much as you tried to remove Anakin from your mind, he just wouldn’t seem to leave so you enlisted the help of a professional. 
You would go to therapy sessions twice a week; not solely because of Anakin but he definitely was part of it.
Mainly you went to try and deal with the reality of being such a young mother and work on letting your stress out in positive ways: though on occasion you would try to gain insight on your relationship with the older man.
When the therapist asked about him, you explained all he had been through and let her know you knew some of the reasons he acted the way he did; but your therapist assured you no matter the reasons, that didn’t negate the validity of your feelings. 
The first few times you went you were skeptical; how was talking to some random person supposed to help you feel relieved and emotionally stable?
But after a few sessions, you started to see a difference in your moods and outlook on things. 
It was a few days after Anakin’s results came in that Ash told you about the visit she paid Anakin; she recapped her argument with him, his relapse, and that she made him go to the clinic, she told you that she would relay his results to you as soon as she could. 
You worried that she would be upset that you didn’t tell her that he was the father or that the two of you were together, but she brushed it off, “I kinda had a feeling, ya know?”.
You felt bad that he relapsed and was all alone, but then you remembered he was alone on his own merit, his behavior pushed those who cared most away… it wasn’t your fault. 
You didn’t know how long fertility tests usually took, but you awaited the results anxiously.
Every day you woke up hoping that maybe he would reach out or that maybe he would show up at your door, but each time you only set yourself up for disappointment. 
It had been around a week after Ahsoka told you he got the test; sure these things took some time, but he should have the results by now.
You weighed the option of just asking him flat out because you were frankly over his asshole hermit bit. 
The weather was nice and you didn’t have any responsibilities today… ok, maybe you would pay him a visit. You rested a palm on your stomach as you bent over to grab your shoes from the shoe rack; you were definitely showing much more than you were during the first trimester. 
You were about to head out when your phone began to ring; it was Ahsoka.
“Hey Ash, what's up?” you asked as you searched for your keys. 
I finally got it
“Got what?”
It took a lot of coaxing, but I finally got the results
You stopped at the door and placed your keys back onto the counter top; maybe you wouldn’t have to see him. 
y/n…he’s viable.
A weight felt like it had been lifted from your chest, now he had undeniable proof you were telling the truth the whole time- everything he said was for nothing and you were vindicated. 
“That’s amazing news'' you exclaimed into the phone; surely your friend could hear the huge smile on your face just from your voice. 
Yea, but what are you going to do now? He’s the father and now he knows it… you aren’t just going to let him back in after all he did, right?
“No Ash, He knows the truth now and if he wants this or is mature enough, he will come to me and apologize. The ball is in his court” you explained.
Atta girl
You smiled at your friend’s support, “Thanks Ahsoka” 
Anytime
The phone call ended and you went back to your room- hopefully you would be hearing an apology soon or at least hearing from him in general. 
_______________________________________
Across town Anakin sat on his couch and absentmindedly flipped through the channels on his tv; he told Ahsoka the news this morning and it drained him to make the call.
Ahsoka thanked him for getting the test and asked how he felt about the news. He answered quickly and hung up. He knew she was going to tell you and that he should tell you himself and apologize. But what would that do?
It would just solidify that he was a complete asshole- you deserved so much better. Surely you would do the same that he did to you…shut you down completely and demand you leave. 
Maker, why was he such an arrogant shit?
His half drunk mind wasn’t operating at full capacity and he was making a lot of dumb rationalizations to his problems;
You already thought he was an asshole, so why even bother telling you the news himself? 
You deserved better so he should just disappear from your life and not weigh you down.
He really nothing going for him, so fuck it- he was gonna get shitfaced. 
Soon he had made his way back to the couch with a six pack of bud lite and he cracked the first one. Cheers to the pathetic joke that was his life. He gulped them down one by one and sooner than he thought, the pack was already gone. 
He had a good buzz going and went to fetch more but when he scanned his messy fridge for the tinted glass bottles he couldn’t find any. 
“Fuck” he muttered, that was his last case. 
He groaned and slammed the fridge door shut. There was nothing here to cure his itch for alcohol, so he decided tonight would be a great night to go out and get shitfaced in public, cause why the fuck not?
He got his phone out and grabbed one of the many styluses he had scattered through the house for his convenience. He called for an uber to pick him up.
As he waited he changed into pants, a long sleeve, and his gloves- it had been awhile since he had gone out and he forgot what a hassle it was to put all of that shit on. 
By the time he was dressed and collected his wallet, the uber was there. Anakin was an experienced drinker, so even though he already had six beers packed away, he could sober up if he needed to be able to get into the bar. 
The car he rode in was a nice sedan, it was silver and looked like a new model; the problem for Anakin was getting in. All of the cars he usually rode in (yours, Ahsoka’s, Ben’s, and his own) were bigger and sat higher up, so he wasn’t used to having to crouch down to get in. 
He sighed and placed a stiff hand on the roof of the car to steady himself as he lowered himself into the car; he sat with a thud and grunted.
The driver was probably only a few years his junior- he wore big circle glasses, a patterned button down and had a clean shaven face. He looked like a pushover.
Anakin winced at the overwhelming smell of eucalyptus that entered his senses; he wondered how this guy was driving for a job like this- how would he defend himself against a potential threat? By throwing his eucalyptus at them?
Ahh, what was he doing? He was being judgmental for no reason. 
“Are you alright sir?” the man asked.
“Yea, i’m fine,” Anakin said, crossing his arms. 
The man nodded and began to drive to the bar Anakin had entered into the app. 
The bar he wanted to go to was one in the heart of the city, he didn’t want to talk to anyone tonight, but he also didn’t want to be alone; this bar was perfect for that because there were always people doing some random shit that he could eavesdrop on. 
They pulled up to the curb and the driver parked the car. Anakin thanked the man and opened the door to exit. Maker, he was getting nauseous from that fucking air freshener. 
He swung one leg out of the car and pushed himself up with his opposite hand. He stood and grabbed onto the hood of the car with his hand; that was harder than it had to be… damn these prosthetics. 
Once he was standing he shut the door just as the driver was asking if he needed any assistance.
Groups of people crowded around the entrance of the establishment. Some were old regulars whose teeth looked like they were gonna fall out from all of the substances they abused and on the other side there were a group of younger kids who were trying to figure out who was going to try out their fake ID first. 
He scoffed as he pushed through both groups to get inside. The bar was warm and smelled of weed, smoke, and liquor- relief washed over the melancholic man, this is where he would be able to forget. 
An open barstool was soon occupied by him and a bartender quickly made her way down to his seat. 
“I’ll have some of that honey bourbon I've been hearing people rave about” he said, a $10 bill folded between his fingers. 
“Alright, hun, that’s commin’ right up” the busty lady on the other side of the counter said as she grabbed the 10 from his hand, her hand lingering longer than he liked. 
Anakin could tell she was trying to flirt to get a better tip; back before you, he would have gladly indulged her game and revel in every motion she would do to purposefully push up her breasts and flirt back 5 times harder than she was… but now, he had no desire.
All he could think of when she tried to flirt was how he’d much rather be having a quiet night with you, not some bartender who didn’t give a rat’s ass about his life.
His drink was placed in front of him and the woman smiled, “here you are handsome”.
Normally that wouldn’t bother him- she was just doing her job… But tonight he just couldn’t. 
Once he thanked her, she sauntered away; Anakin raised a judgey brow as she intentionally swayed her hips back and forth. When she was finally busy with another customer he called over one of the other bartenders.
“Hey man, you think you could serve me tonight, I don’t really appreciate all of her flirting” he said as blankly as he could. 
The man cleaning glasses on the other side of the mahogany surface chuckled and nodded, “haha, yes man, no problem. She does lay it on pretty hard sometimes, I get it”.
Anakin thanked the man and continued to down drinks. 
As it got later, more and more people began showing up and it became uncomfortably hot. The music started to give him a headache and the smoke was getting thicker; he knew it was time to go when he could hardly suppress his coughing (no thanks to his fucked up lungs). 
The cool evening air felt cleaner than it ever had before as Anakin stood a few yards down from the bar. He had gotten far enough out of the way that he could still hear and see the lights from inside but no line was around him.
He shoved his hands into his pockets and looked up at the sky; the city’s light pollution hid the stars; he still liked to imagine how they’d look. 
He had no idea how much he had in that bar, but he felt like it wasn’t enough- he needed to do something crazy- he needed to interact with people. He wasn’t completely gone yet, but he was pretty drunk (even if he wouldn’t admit it). 
He stumbled down the sidewalk as he made his way to another bar, not far from where he was, that was a “no-smoking” establishment; he wouldn’t have to worry about choking on air there.
The sidewalk seemed to move as he steadied himself by placing a hand on the wall of the buildings on the way to his destination. 
He was feeling pretty good; his problems were far from his mind, instead he was focusing on getting to the bar. He finally made it and attempted to sit on the barstool that just couldn’t seem to sit still. Eventually he caught a bartender’s attention and got set up there with a 20 oz draft beer. 
This bar was crowded too, but less head-pounding music and young adults. He sipped his drink peacefully as he watched the others in the bar; there were a few couples on dates, a group of guys playing pool, and another group throwing darts. 
He downed his beer and placed the glass on the bar as he waited for more- this was definitely one way to spend his army money. 
As he waited a brown haired woman came up behind him and placed a lingering hand on his shoulder.
“Hello, you look lonely tonight, anything I could help with?”.
The lady wore a dress that was way too short and it did not flatter her body at all. She smelled of overwhelming cheap perfume and beer. He was already over it. 
“Nah, I’m just fine,” he said, attempting to wave her off.
She caught one of his gloved hands and began taking off his covering as she asked, “ooh, you have very stiff hands, must be strong-lets see..”.
She managed to get the glove halfway up his palm before he snatched his hand to his chest; “what the fuck you think you’re doing?!” he hissed.
She laughed, “You’re like a robot or somethin’ haha, I’m sure I could please you better than that plastic could, and I only require a pack of cigs after, no monetary charge” she promoted proudly. 
“Not in a million years lady” Anakin mumbled as his cup was replaced with a full one. 
She scoffed and put her hands on her hips, “well that’s alright, I didn’t really want to fuck a cripple anyways”.
At that moment Anakin had the urge to grab her by that pathetic excuse of a dress and throw her against the nearest wall, but he knew he shouldn’t.
“Fuck off”
“No wonder you look lonely, with a personality like that you must be impossible to be around” she huffed before finding the next guy to latch on to. 
He was getting drunker and her words hit a little too close to home- he needed to be more wasted. He began to find random people who would do shots with him. Soon he was blacked out and drinking with everyone. 
“ and i-its its sooo fucked, ‘cause I… I really do love her, but she… I don’t think s-she… I don’t know, WHO WANTS TO DO MORE SHOTS?!” Anakin was everywhere.
He sat at the bar and did two hurricane shots right after another (where you drink it then get water thrown in your face then the bartender slaps you across the face). He was at the point that he couldn’t even feel that-he was gone. 
Though soon after, the shots began catching up with him and he started feeling nauseous. He laid his forehead down on the bar and puked in between his legs and the counter. Some people around offered to help and the bartender got him some water; he insisted he didn’t need it but the alcohol was definitely making him dehydrated. 
Through the middle of sounds he heard a staff member say, “someone needs to get him outta here, we can’t have him in the bar like this”. 
The fuck were they saying? He was completely fine. 
Before he could tell what was happening he was being carried out of the bar and was sitting on the curb outside. Fuck, what was going on?
Everything was blurry, he felt nauseous and all he could focus on was this sharp pain in his side and the pounding headache that was plaguing him.
________________________
Anakin had no idea where he was, but he knew he didn’t feel good. He sat up and puked.
He felt a hand on his back and was about to protest when another wave of nausea hit- when would it end?
More shit happened in a blur and he eventually made it into an Uber and headed home. 
————-about two hours earlier—————
After he was thrown out of the bar downtown he was picked up by a group of frat boys who thought it would be cool to challenge a random drunk guy to a drinking contest.
In his inebriated state, Anakin went with the men (even though they basically had to carry him to the club they were going to). 
No one in their right mind would still allow Anakin to consume drinks, he was visibly not well and clearly needed to be cut off; but that wouldn’t be any fun for the frat.
They took him to a club where they frequented so the staff allowed them to do whatever the fuck they wanted. 
Anakin continued to drink and drink… and drink. 
Once he started puking again, one of the relatively kinder boys took time to ask his address and got him an uber home.
And that's where Anakin was now. 
He rested his forehead against the back window of the sedan and the driver drove quickly; he was probably worried that Anakin was going to yak in the back of his car. They arrived at Anakin’s apartment in decent time and the driver asked Anakin to leave. 
Anakin nodded and tried to get up but he couldn’t quite get his footing; the driver huffed and helped him out of the car. 
The driver helped Anakin into the house and saw some cash lying on the end table; sure, he helped Anakin inside but that didn’t mean this guy was a saint. 
Anakin leaned against the wall for support the driver swiped the cash and dashed out of the door. He had no clue what happened or what was going on, all he knew was that he felt awful and he needed to get to bed. 
He headed that way but he tripped over himself and landed on the floor with a thud.
A groan escaped him and his vision went black. 
***
a/n: more self destructive behavior… what’s new? lolll, srry the updates have been spaced out a bit, i’ve been doing a lot at work haha
taglist : @dnamht @sxoulohvn @angeelcoree @wtf-andys @httpeachesblog @katsukiswrld @jetiikote @poisonedsultana @imarimone12 @fallinlovewithevil
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itafushin · 1 year
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Do you have headcanons about macaque's recovering process from bpd and his copying skills (like about holding back extreme emotions or apathy, how does he regularly motivates himself to keep healing and so on)?
thats honestly a really good question...strap in, its a long one
macaque is definitely prone to bad spirals and bad episodes, as evident in the show, and he tends to internalize a lot of it and lash out in aggression. because of that i feel like starting the healing process was really hard for him. with lbd off his back and a lot more free time, im sure he thought alot about the things he did in the last few centuries. he probably stayed holed up in his dojo for a good while after the lbd stuff and just...thought. all that thinking led to spirals and breakdowns and he spent that time crying more than hes ever cried in his life. but afterwards i think he felt fine, stagnant even, and thats when he finally decided he could move on.
its hard giving up your fp and if hes anything like me im sure he didnt want to let go. he didnt want to break off those ties he had with wukong because those were familiar, safe. he fell back onto bad habits a lot, (i headcanon that he has s/h stims and he pulls on his fur when hes really stressed which adds to his bald spots), and found himself in spots where he felt the urge to go and fight wukong again, like before. during times like these his shadows are actually really helpful ! they help ground him and im sure rumble and savage help talk him through his breakdowns when theyre alone together. they help drive him to keep going, i think, because they know as well as he does that he needs this.
i think mk is another big motivator for macaque too, if not the biggest. he cares about mk so much, way more than he was ever expecting to, and i think he does hold some guilt and remorse about the way he treated mk. he wants to repair their relationship and actually become friends in the genuine way that mks friends with everyone else. and mac knows he cant get that if hes still holding onto the past, ya know. he wants to be someone mk could go to when wukong isn't available (he makes that...very very clear its honestly a little endearing) so i think he always thinks about mk while hes going through the process of healing.
and honestly, repairing his friendship with wukong could be something of a motivator too. he wants them to have something thats normal, im assuming, and maybe thats why he hangs around ffm still. but its also a little bit of a bittersweet memory of sorts, to see everything still as it was. to see bits of him still there.
with the holding back extreme emotions, macaque is the type to bottle everything up util he explodes. which isnt...healthy AJVKSKCJ i think overtime and mk exposure showed him its okay to feel those things...its okay to cry and to be upset and to just. be a person...obviously he only ever lets himself feel those things in the privacy of his dojo but hey, at least its something !
he does have set backs, as everyone does because healing isnt linear, and he still has days where its almost like hes back to being that hard-headed smartass trying to kill everyone...but i think now its a bit easier to deal with those days because he has a support system. he has people to rely on that wont shun him away, even if things are rocky between them all. but hes trying and he'll keep trying because as much as he lets it on, i dont think he actually enjoys being alone as much.
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pinkmoondoll9shihtzu · 2 months
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i am working through something and i wanted to express it somewhere but it feels too personal to say publicly.. and your blog feels like a safe place to confess things.. I want to go on hrt but am terrified of my mother's reaction. she knows im trans and is a lot more ok with it than she used to be but she still doesn't understand and is really bothered by her own lack of understanding. and my sense is that when my appearance changes from T shes going to hate it and be extremely upset. I'm an adult and I dont want to be controlled by my mother's feelings but due to my family dynamics growing up I have rotated around her feelings my whole life, its not as bad as it used to be but i still feel her feelings are dangerous and painful to me. I have a great support system, im blessed with so many friends and even my older siblings who I wasn't close with have been very supportive of me being trans. I dont need to be scared, materially I will be safe and loved even if my mother hurts me. but still its so terrifying to me. I want to get over this and not feel so dependent on her approval, but at the same time i dont even know if its possible. who can help wanting their mother to love them? or even more than love, because i know she does love me and thats really why its so hard, i want her to approve of me and be happy for me. I dont want the happiness i know i will feel from going on hrt to be ruined by her hating my life choices. my spiritual life is pushing me to take control of my life and bring my internal self and reality into the material, I know i cant keep ignoring my own physical desires and living with dissonance between the internal and external...so im moving towards that and i know i'll get there regardless its just terrifying and i wanted to talk about it.. uhh ya sorry this is so personal and emotional i hope it isnt uncomfortable for you or anyone else to read because i know these are really painful issues for many people. and i don't expect you to have any advice necessarily i know htese are huge issues to work through... i just wanted to express it and put it into the world that i'm working on this. thank you for letting me use your askbox to talk! hope your day is great
thankyou for trusting me with your confession anon <3 its not at all uncomfortable to me for you to confide your feelings.. Does anyone who's transitioned have supportive advice they cld leave for anon in the replies? i dont want to speak on something i havent personally experienced.
One thing i do relate to immensely is having a mother who doesn't try to see you as a unique individual, and becomes very displeased when u act in ways that don't align with her worldview. my mom will straight up tell me i look ugly with pink hair. my mom knows i make music but she's never asked to hear one of my songs. she doesn;t want to know about anything that interests me or my motivations in life. etc etc. and it's that same feeling of like, well, she does Love me i think, but i'll never feel that she truly approves of me. idk what the answer is..in my own life it has lead to me being quite a distant person, and rebellious in nature, i coped with it by purposefully leaning into the parts of me she disapproved of most. but idk if that's been healthy for me.
ultimately, we will disappoint everyone in our lives at one point or another.. Sometimes even when u try ur best to please someone it still doesn't work out. so please dont be too hard on urself <3 One thing im learning to cope with my ocd spirals (usually body dysmorphia or guilt related) is to "zoom out", try and redirect my thoughts to the bigger picture of life, it makes my own problems feel smaller in a way that doesn;t silence or dismiss them, just re-contextualizes them in that moment and makes it feel less imminent & overwhelming. mayb i can talk more about methods and analogies for this sometime.
Hope u can find some peace anon and i'm sure your hopes and dreams will materialize for u if u just keep going & focusing your energy on ur dreams. Stay safe <333 PMD9
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itsalola07 · 2 years
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"Maybe you should go home, I dont think Sally wants to see you today." Cassie said lightly, patting Jeremiah on the shoulder as she guarded the front door.
"Come on Cas, she's gonna want to see me, she always does."
"Well, normally I'd be with you, but she specifically said to 'beat away any boys from the door with a broom if I had to.' Sorry."
"Don't worry about it, I'll make it work," he sighed with a shrug, picking his bag off the porch and heading around the side. Cassie watched as he walked away, knowing he'd still get in, but this was no longer her problem, so she went back in to watch tv.
Jeremiah was used to climbing the oak tree in their yard, he had done it a lot since he had become so close with Sally, he could do it pretty quick. The issue was getting in. He could see her silouette through her blinds, so he reached out and slide open the glass of her window.
"Fuck! Who the fu -Jeremiah??!" The blinds whipped open, Sally jumping at his attempt to get in. Jeremiah quickly hopped over to the window sill to stick himself in before she had a chance to slam it shut.
"Jeremiah, you get your stupid fucking ass out of my goddamn window now or I'll push you out myself." She yelled, attempting to shove him, but he was already halfway in. He had gotten stuck before, and they figured out he could shimmey his way in if he turned his hip a certain way.  With a loud crash, he fell onto her floor, checking nothing fell out of the bag.
"Here to stay, Sal." He smirked, brushing himself off as he sat up to her bed.
"Cas! You bitch, I said no boys!!" Sally screamed loud enough that they knew she could hear.
"She did her best, that's why I snuck in, Don't be mad at her, ok?" He said a little gentler, trying not to upset her more.
"I'm not mad at her! I just dont want anyone to see me! And you're seeing me!" Sally's anger quickly shifted, as her lip quivered and there was a glimmer of unspilled tears in her eyes. She gave a gross sniffle and started to cry, plopping down next to Jer.
"I don't mind seeing you." He reassured her, putting his hand on her shoulder. She looked at him, honestly looking a mess. Her hair was down, a rarity, wearing an old ratty, pink hoody and grey sweatpants, and her face was beyond red from crying and or anger.
"I look like shit."
"You've looked fucking worse, trust me."
"Oh ha fucking ha.," the tears had stopped and she looked angry again.
"Remember the time you got in that fist fight with henderson, you looked like ground meat, way worse then."
"Sorry, no matter what you say, I'm not going to feel any less yucky than I am," she flopped back on her bed, hands resting on her stomach.
"Well I have something that will maybe help?" It peaked her interest. Jeremiah dumped the content of his bag onto her bed, her eyes lighting up. There was a large, wrapped up chocolate cupcake, some candy bars, a heating pad, and a bottle of painkillers.
"Oh my god, you're my fucking hero, holy shit, that cupcake. Give it here."
"I got ya," Jeremiah laughed, unwrapping it and handing it over, Sally immediately taking a large bite. She looked ready to cry again, but a happy cry at least.
"I don't know shit about girls periods and stuff, this shit helps, right?" Almost all of Jeremiah's friends, especially his close friends were girls, he was slowly catching on to these things.
"You have no fucking idea," she giggled, quickly finishing off the cupcake and taking out some pills for her cramps. She had a bottle of water by her bed and took some.
"Now you happy I snuck in here?"
"No, im still an ugly bitch right now. I'm on the verge of trying to beat the shit out of you."
"You're always a bitch though" Jeremiah smiled, nuding her slightly. She almost looked mad, but he saw the smile peak under the grimace and then she started laughing too.
"Fuck off." She pushed him back, and continued laughing long after he stopped, giggling uncontrollably before wincing in pain and pressing her hand on her stomach, giggling turning into crying.
Jeremiah wasn't equipped with what he was supposed to do, so he did what he knew best and pulled her close into a hug, running his fingers through her hair soothingly. She grabbed at his shirt, resting her head against his chest.
"Can I do anything?"
"You've done fucking more than enough. Honeslty, just like, whatever you're doing, please." She grumbled again him, crying stoped but still visably in pain. Jeremiah guided her so they could both properly lay down next to each other, and he did his best to hold her until she was okay to go back to snacking and smiling.
Written by: @25thhanabusa
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coolkidstuffsblog · 1 year
Text
apologize.
misty x nat
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misty held onto natalie "you wont leave me right nat?" misty looked up to nat "ofcourse not misty..i'll never leave you." misty smiles as nat places a kiss onto mistys head and went back to watching tv.
__
nat laid next to kevyn after her agruement with misty she called kevyn to had sex with again, nat turned arount 'dont feel bad for her.' nat furrowed her eyebrows and thought about mistys face if she finds out.
natalie wouldn’t be able to forgive herself if it ever happends, if misty finds out nat will end up dead and she already knows that misty wouldnt forgive her no matter what.
but why did she turn to sex? instead of solving it out she just had sex with kevyn, shes with misty..mistys her girlfriend or lover who knows but the point is! is that she and misty are together and she has to get rid of this manwhore on her bed.
__
misty stared at nat with widened eyes "i..i slept with kevyn." mistys bottom lip trembles as she launches foward and back hands nat "what the fuck!" nat felt blood inside her mouth "y-you betrayed me! you lied to me?!" nat scoffs "duh misty, we just-" misty cuts her off "god! how could i be so stupid! your natalie scatorccio ofcourse this would've happend!" misty began to cover her face as she began to feel herself crumble into pieces "i-i thought you loved me..was that a lie." nats face dropped and she walked to misty trying to touch her hand to get it off her face "no it wa-" misty shoves nat "dont touch me!" misty turns around "misty..it was an accident it wont happen again." misty scoffs.
nat sighs "misty..i-im sorry..i love you." misty turns around "well i dont." natalies face turned pale as she walks out of her own house leaving nat in there.
__
misty drove a bit far before breaking down into tears "how could i've been so stupidd.." misty grips onto her steering wheel in anger.
misty began to sob even more as she imagined nat and kevyn probably begin dating and get together "who knows maybe they'll have kids i dont know." misty sighs and laid against the window, she was exhausted and she felt sad and upset and every other upseting emotion she could feel the nausea in her mouth "oh my god..if nat kisses kevyn then kisses me? OH GOD." misty began to gag and ended up puking on the streets in disgust.
__
misty went back into her house til she turned noticing the walls had yellow balloons and nat with flowers and caligula with a little hat "hi misty.." nat was flustered from embarrassment, misty felt her heart melt "i wanted to talk this out..ya know?" misty nods "i mean we werent even together yet so i dont even know why im so pissed." misty shrugs.
after a couple tears and bitch-fest misty forgave nat because she already knows what to do if kevyn even gets near her.
nat sat on the couch and misty sat on her lap wrapping her arms around her girlfriends neck happily kicking her feet as natalie turns on the tv and places her hand onto mistys waist to hold her in place.
misty sighs "you wont do it again right?" nat shakes her head "nah..he has a small dick anyways." misty chuckles "if you went to him so many times then your lying." nat rolls her eyes "hes just good at going dow-" misty pulls back from nats arm "NUHUH! NO i dont wanna hear this." misty crosses her arms "alright alright..but your better then him anyways." misty turns "really?" nat chuckles "yeah! your 10 times better then him in sex! a 100 percent!" misty scoffs "i dont believe you." nat shrugs "so me screaming out your name wasnt real?" mistys face turns red at the memory "nat, he probably made you feel nice too." nat shook her head "not better then you!" nat wraps her arms around mistys waist and began swaying them both.
"hes not that good really..barley even knows what hes doing." misty giggles and goes back to watching tv, nat places a peck onto mistys cheek and places her head on her shoulder "when are we gonna become a thing?" misty asks "now." nat smiles up at misty "alright..um misty quigley, would you like to be my girlfriend?" misty smiles "i'd love to." misty and natalie share one kiss before going back to watching tv, caligula flies next to them and sat near them.
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moss-sprouted · 3 months
Note
Lets say.... even numbers!
thats so many and this took so long but i mean if you want it here ya go
0: Height
5'4 last i checked
2: Shoe size
uhhhh 7.5-8?
4: Do you drink?
absolutely not i think id die
6: Age you get mistaken for
i think i mostly just get that im 18+ so not really mistaken for much
8: Want any tattoos?
i think id like a memorial to my animals one day but i have no idea what style or where
10: Want any piercings?
i would like to get my septum pierced but but my body hates fun so who knows if it would take
12: Relationship status
in a non romantic relationship but also polyam
14: Biggest turn offs
uhh probably just focusing on yourself or sending unsolicited personal pictures if i dont have an established relationship with you
16: I’ll love you if
you make an effort to talk to me a decent amount, it just makes me feel like you want to spend time with me and think about me, doesnt have to be everyday but i usually am in peoples lives longer if it is almost everyday
18: Most traumatic experience
theres a lot of them,physically traumatic would be getting bronchitis, the most psychologically would be probably be a couple different relationships and how they ended
20: What I hate most about myself
how bad my mental health is
22: What I want to be when I get older
it'd be nice to eventually be in a job involving animals
24: My relationship with my parent(s)
nonexistent but also bad
26: My biggest pet peeves
people no longer wanting to engage with me when i dont want anything to be sexual
28: A description of the person I dislike the most
i cant remember any facial features of him but hes older than me and a pedophile and a groomer lol
30: What I hate the most about work/school
not having a strict schedule or days off
32: What words upset me the most
honestly nowadays its just being referred to as a girl or having majorly feminine words applied to me
34: What I find attractive in women
honestly anything i can find attractive in women i can usually find in anyone,and physical features barely matter to me cause if i become attached to you and youre nice then i usually find you attractive, it rarely comes before that
36: Where I would like to live
somewhere that the people i care about also are, but i think it needs to be sunny and warm sometimes because im a lizard and will die otherwise
38: My childhood career choice
i think i would always choose vet when in asked but i dont think id really enjoy that since the animals would be hurt
40: Who wish I could be
myself but less fucked up lmao
42: The last thing I ate
i think chamomile tea and some sourdough, have not had anything today
44: A random fact about anything
one of my childhood cats had thumbs
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pinkadork · 6 months
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I haven't really talked much but like.
Between being sexually harassed trying to get to work since my car erupted into flames and then paying that mf ( and ofc people i trust) to take me to work (when they do since its not like i havent been left either at the house or at work and had to either stay home, walk or beg people to pick me up, between my family hanging money over my head trying to get me motivated and help me get a car when i could really use it more to help with bills, the immense summer guilt thats just become the norm atp. I feel it. I've been tired for so long. I try to fake some kind of mojo on some fake it til ya ma it shit but i stg everyday is some other bs. I've had stuff get cut off temporarily in the past so it shouldnt be a big deal but idk. I just wish things couldve been different i guess.
I shouldve been fired ,which I'm glad im not but the anxiety knowing im well past the point limit and feel like at any moment im gonna either get a call that im fired or get dropped off just for my ID to not work and be stuck walkin back is constantly on my mind.
I always feel like im still messing up relationships with people i love and care about even though im trying and have been using the coping skills ive since ive been seeing a therapist again. Yeah i say im lonely but is more than that honestly, im just devastated everyday goes by like this, i had to address and try to figure out the situation of their stuff a few months ago because i felt immensely guilty over everything. I packed stuff up months ago im still washing and packing. Or i was. I feel like i dont get to so shit now but disappoint and upset people. I couldn't even explain that im upset because i feel like ive had to try and motivate myself so much just to live and that i feel like i dont go to work for anything. Hearing everyone talk about the good money we make at work knowing i havent been able to make it a full work week with out something happening irks my soul, even more so when its like im still trying and then either the response is try harder or give up and throw away the progress. I dont necessarily care about money but its obvious niggas need it. Ive been eating out of the convenience store or at work since August. Ive bought groceries twice in the last 3 months and groceries is being charitable because if im being honest i bought some breakfast food and have been esting on that to the point where i might be tired of it. I've always had to take care of myself against the stupidest of odds so sue me if im bitter that instead of chilling and relishing like everyone else about owning my house after being homeless and getting kicked out, thrown around, feeling like i have to mold into this nigga, that nigga to get through shit. I'm sorry that after every funeral, fight, breakup, sudden job change, shitty living environment, and overall fuckup ive done in my life wont mean a goddamn thing. Its always just gonna be something i couldve done more with, did better, tried harder. I dont want too anymore.
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moemoemammon · 3 years
Note
im so sorry i dont know how to format this but could i request hcs of mc walking into one of the brothers rooms in the middle of the night and being like “um i had a nightmare.. can i stay with you”🧍if not its okay though!! :]
I Had a Nightmare...
(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)
✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦
Lucifer
Lucifer always keeps his door locked when he's asleep, so you took a gamble in choosing to come to him for your post-nightmare comfort. Luckily, the eldest is a night owl so he's awake.
He looks up when you enter his bedroom, currently sitting on his bed and reading a book. He's about to scold you when he sees the face you're making.
You don't even have to tell him something's wrong, because he can tell. He sets his book aside and gestures to the empty side of his bed.
Once you climb in, Lucifer shifts slightly, just so your arm is pressed against his own. It's like an invitation for you to lean in if you want, and should you choose to, he'll wrap you in his arms and carefully rub your back.
"A nightmare, hm? It's interesting to think that there are things that can scare you, considering where you are right now. But there's nothing for you to be afraid of. After all, I have no intention of letting anything bad happen to you, so long as I live."
Mammon
Mammon startles awake the moment you enter his room, nearly toppling out of his bed in the process. Grrr, he could've seriously gotten hurt! What're you trying to pull, suddenly barging into his room like th-
Oh. Oh.... He takes one look at your face and all that anger of his fizzles out into nothing. He's a little self conscious being shirtless and all, so he awkwardly tugs on a tshirt that's been tossed to the floor, and makes his way over to you
What happened? Did someone do something?? Ah.. a nightmare, huh? Mammon's big brother instincts are taking over, and he's pulling you into a tight hug, squeezing out all your worries.
And when he's finished, he ruffles your hair and gestures to his bed. A human like you still needs to get their rest, so you should try to sleep some more. But if you really can't, he's not against the idea of the two of you bundling up and watching a movie or something.
"You're like a little kid, ya know? But don't worry, the Great Mammon's gonna chase away those bad dreams o' yours, no problem! ...Hah? Whatdya mean 'that's cheesy'?? I'm being serious here!"
Levi
Levi's definitely awake when you enter his room, but he doesn't notice you. His computer monitor has his undivided attention, and his headphone are drowning out the sound of your entry.
So it takes you tapping his shoulder for him to react, and boy does he react. Levi nearly has a heart attack and only calms down when he realizes it's only you. Did you come to play games? You should've texted him and he’d set everything up! But wait... that's not it?
You had a nightmare and of all the places you could go, you came to HIM?? Levi's having a hard time pushing down the grin on his face, but he collects himself for your sake. Now's no time to be feeling giddy when his best friend is in need!
He might not be great at comforting people, but he knows what helps him when he has nightmares. So he wraps you up in a blanket and pulls up a chair for you to use so you can watch him game. This is better than thinking about that other stuff, right?
"I'll turn down the screen brightness, and- UWAH! W-wait! Um... no, it's fine. I don't mind if you lean against me like that. You're tired, so it's probably more comfortable like that. I'll keep still, okay..?"
Satan
Nightmares aren't something Satan experiences often, being born of rage and the only pure demon in the house. He reads enough horror novels that he's practically become immune to anything scary.
But that doesn't mean he never has bad dreams, so when you come into his room to tell him about yours, his expression softens up. You caught him in the middle of reading, but you're more important than any silly book.
Satan gives you that warm look he reserves only for you (and cats), and gestures for you to come closer. He's got the second comfiest bed in the house, the first being Belphie's. Topped with warm quilts and plenty of pillows to support him as he reads, you're wrapped up in warm comfort once you join him.
Especially when he wraps an arm around you, giving you a curious look. He can be a little too curious at times, so he immediately asks what your nightmare was about.
"If you're interested, I have a guidebook for dream interpretations. I could try to find out the root of your worries, or... you could spend the night here instead? I wouldn't mind having you by my side until morning."
Asmo
Asmo is VERY invested in his beauty sleep. Even a slight deviation in his schedule could be disastrous for his complexion! His brothers know better than to disturb him lest they feel like dying, but you? You're the only exception... Lucky, huh? ❤️
When you touch him, he barely stirs. It takes a couple of shakes to get him to wake up, and then he's whining and grumbling until he realizes who's there. How could he be upset when he gets to wake up to your gorgeous face?
But right now.. your expression isn't bright and sunny at all. You look distressed, and he soon learns it because a pesky nightmare has been harassing you all night. He couldn't be happier that you chose HIM of all people for your comfort!
While there are many things he could do to help you forget about your bad dream, he opts for carefully guiding you into his bed, cooing sweet nothings until he's got you in his arms. You're enveloped in the smell of his sweet body lotion while he presses kiss after gentle kiss across your temple and down the bridge of your nose.
"There there, love. To think a nightmare has put you in such a state.. It's unforgivable! I'll get rid of all those worries so you can spend the rest of the night dreaming about my beauty! Or... about you and I. Wouldn't that be the perfect dream?"
Beel
Beel sleeps almost as soundly as Belphie does, and his monstrously loud snoring drowns out most sound, including your quiet knocking on his bedroom door.
But when you come in and tug on his sleeve, Beel's eyes blink open and he lets out a confused grunt, letting his eyes focus on the darkness around him. Where did that mountain of rainbow pizza go?? He wasn't even halfway done, and- Oh. MC.
You had a nightmare?? Beel stands up immediately and wears a look of worry, pulling you into a gentle hug. You look like you need one.
He's not the best when it comes to comforting words, but he can just show you how he feels. That's good too, isn't it? Maybe if he hugs you for long enough, you won't remember your nightmare.
"Do you want to take my bed? I'll sleep on the sofa, so- ah. Together? ...That's fine, too. I'll hold you close, so you don't have to be afraid anymore."
Belphie
The heaviest sleeper in the entire Devildom, it's a literal miracle that you managed to wake him up. Still, he's only half awake, and staring blankly at you while you explain why you're there.
A nightmare, huh? He's had plenty of those. If that's all it is, then just climb into bed with him. Belphie lazily pulls back his blankets and opens his arms for you, gesturing expectantly.
And once you're nice and cozy, he pulls you even closer until the gap between you is closed, and all you can feel is his warmth. He buries his face into your neck, tickling your skin with his breath.
His slow, heavy breathing makes you wonder if he's fallen back to sleep just like that, but he gives your side a reassuring squeeze and lets his eyes open slightly to look into yours.
"Must've been pretty scary if you came all the way here. No matter how many bad dreams you have, I'll be right here when you wake up. It feels better to wake up in my arms, doesn't it?"
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hitoshisbabygirl · 3 years
Text
Author's Notes ♡:Sooooo I wrote this once with no mythological background and it was so blank because one I half read and two it had no pizzazz. So here I am...enjoying this collab wholeheartedly. For some context the readers dad is Dionysus, yknow the festive, wine maker? So I tried to incorporate that with being a potions maker! Rappa is based on a mix between Behemoths and the Kusarikku, so i wanted him just a big and a bull man hybrid but not fully a Minotaur! I hope whoever reads this enjoy it as much as I did writing it! (Also I’m slowly realizing how much I hope this man)~ bunny ❥
Here’s the lovely masterlist of the others beautiful arts!
Warnings : NSFW again! (◎_◎;)
A use of pet names l, uh some heavy size kink (if you know who I based him on, also is one of my kinks showing yet) , Needy Rappa, breeding, Light cursing, a bit of a pussy job, female oral and a bit of overstimulation.
Word count : About 6.5k (ooof) !
Paring(s) : Bullman! Kendo Rappa x F!Reader
Summary : Being a demigod had perks, you could travel, you had god and goddesses as siblings and family members and of course the power! But what happens when you have to help a stubborn farm...pet?
Enjoy ♡
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Growing up as a demigods daughter who owned a garden on earth was one experience. All types of people, gods, goddesses and hybrids needed her experience with all sorts of plants and other things from nature ; rather it be for healing medicines , a bouquet for an upset lover or for help with livestock growth, [ ] and her parents helped with every little working class they could. As [ ] went from child to young adult she was used to her fair share of men from every place asking for her attention. A human asking for her hand and giving her the bare minimum, a god, wanting to make her a goddess, or just simply flirting to warrant her attention. But alas to them all she gave them no leadway, keeping her same polite smile and overall sweetness to each and every person she dealt with. On a warm day in the heavens as she walked the sky castles grounds she ran into a farmhand, one she remembered worked for Demeter approached her hesitantly, his eyes wandering to the young maidens “U-uh M-miss [ ] right?” The male asked her , her eyebrow raising as a silent answer “Lady Demeter would like to speak with you, she need some help but she did not tell me exactly what” he said with a bow and soon turned to leave. Wondering what the goddess could want she headed to her ranch, watching the cattle and other animals graze. Suddenly the door swung wide, revealing the deity to her “[ ] my favorite niece how are you love!” The tall woman sing songingly yelled, hugging the wide eyed girl “Hello Auntie Dem, im quite alright! Uhm, what seems to be the problem? One of your hands came to get me” [ ] said as she took in the ranch home her harvesting aunt had, all sorts of gains, wheats, fruits and more spewed about in her living room “Ah yes! Your father told me how great youve become with your potions and mixes of herbs, being the daughter of Dionysus im not surprised! I told him to let you grow and do more now look at you, serving us gods and mortals alike!” Demeter went on, handing her confused niece a large apple as she took one for herself. Becoming her to a table by the window they both sat, eating on their fruit as she explained her issue.
“You see, i have a lot of cattle, different kinds, different kins and legacies, but im a bit stuck. My favorite mare, had a child a little while ago and he seemed to just be your average bull at first….but..as time went on he out grew his father, my prized minotaur bull and even his normal cow and bull family.” Taking a glance to the field they watched as the minotaur children and some sheep danced and played, other average cow cults running to join. Sighing Demeter continued “Hes a hybrid, my prized minotaur as his father and well, my biggest and prized heifer as his mother. He wont come out of the shed, doesnt deal with his other kind, minotaur or not. Hes around your age now, getting to be his prime but..he wont converse in the fields. Both his father and mother voiced concerns to me about his health but when i checked on him, hes fine! Fields away under a sun and away from my younger and ready cows! I dont get it! Maybe because hes more human than he is bull, he does have a human face and even body, just taht everything below is...well bull. Tail, those wonderful breeding-” “Auntie!” Before she could finish [ ] was hushing the woman, waving her arms “I get it i get it Bull bottom human top i dont need to hear about his loins!” She pleaded.
Laughing, the goddess reached to a pile of hay, whistling to feed some of the nearby cows “Ah you silly girl, I was only gloating about my finest bull yet! I even tried bringing him mortals but...he crushed them, saying they were too small. Every single one! Younger older it didnt matter, he wanted nothing to do with them and just squashed them like a bug under his hoofs! I'm at my wits end, Im not sure what he needs, and hes so large i cant just let him walk around the palace place, he intimidates the clerks and huffs when talked to!” Dramatically laying against the table she looked to the thinking girl, her eyes shining with an idea “Hey auntie, how about you take me to him, i can see if hes loss any weight or seems sickly anywhere. Where do you think hed be at this time?” [ ] asked “Ah you brave girl, what time is it, almost high noon? He might be in the field but its the one with my giant tree that he likes” Demeter responded, pointing to a large tree up a few fields with nothing much around it but luhs grass. “Doesnt even matter if i put up a fence, he walks on two legs so he just hops over it” She sighed again as the duo headed outside.
Seeing a tall minotaur coming towards them [ ] stopped along Demeter, her goddess aunt speaking “Ah Milvor, how are you and Altine?” “Lady Demeter and I'm guessing this is [ ], we are fine. The misses is in the field now, seeing if she can see our boy” He said. Realizing that this was the after for her case [ ] spoke up “Uhm sir have you noticed anything amiss with er-” “Kendo, his name is Kendo” The Minatour said “Ah yes with Kendo, anything seem to be hurt or missing from his way of life” She asked. “Well..not particularly. Hes always fought some of the other males here so bruises and marks are a common thing we see from him. Besides a broken horn he doesn't have anything major going on. Just that he refuses to be around anyone here. Even us at times when were out with the others” He said solemnly , looking at the girl. Grabbing her hands he pleaded “Please, help our son? I know he can be rude and dismissive but down there our sweet boy is in there, were worried sick about him” Milvor said, a sad moo coming from his approaching wife “Miss i do appreciate you checking on him, I just hope he'd be home soon” A half cow women spoke , coming beside this Kendo’s father “Well i'll do my best, it doesnt sound like hes too hurt or anything serious so i'll make sure to try and get him to be with you both” Giving a reassuring smile [ ] started off, heading to the tree at the top of them hill. Just before she got far Demeter called to her, handing her sweet wheat “Heres some of his snack, he sometimes will come back if we offer him more” She said. Taking the wheat and putting it in the side of her flowing peplos. Soon with enough treading uphill , she got close to the tree , soon seeing a tail swish from in front of the tree. Hesitantly she walked forward before seeing hooved legs, also covered in black fur, pop out from the tree. Placing a hand at the side that had no person on it she peeked over to in fact , find a rather giant back in the sun, small flecks of freckles on the toned skin. Holding her gift closer she walked to the male before hearing a snort “ ‘M tellin’ ya Elinor I dont want nothin’ to do with ya, go on, go back to the heard” A rough and deep voice said, a larger hand coming up to wave off whoever was behind him. Feeling a bit bad for this mysterious Elinor and offended, she was brushed off [ ] walked closer , standing at the ends of his legs until the male growled. “I told ya to-'' Stopping himself from yelling once he turned around he was surprised to find not hybrid named Elinor but in fact the small [ ] her eyes widening as amber ones looked down “Yer not Elinor” He said as [ ] giggled “And im guessing youre Kendo” She said as the bull sat up, cruising his legs and the curious woman in front of her. “Whos askin?”
He huffed as [ ] looked at him as she did the same , sitting across from the hybrid “A…. doctor of sorts. Your parents, along with Goddess Demeter asked me to come check on you, see how youre doing” she said as he huffed again “ ‘M fine, now why did they send you” He said as he watched her pull things out, paper , a quill, ink and is that..? Pointing to the bustle of wheat he called out “Is that… for me?” Blinking [ ] looked at the almost childish Kendo, smiling as she untied the snack “It is for you, I heard you liked it. Brought it in the hopes youd talk to me?” She questioned, holding a piece out for him to take. Hesitantly he did, gnawing at it as he hummed in delight, his tail swishing. “ So uhm… Doc what do want to know” He asked, watching as the smaller girl touched his chest and arms, squeezing lightly as she wrote down different things “If ya wanted to touch me ya shouldve asked” He teased, taking his own hand to her face. Felling he face warm up she moved back, poking him with a finger “Now now be good im just seing if youre injured. Besides that horn, do you have anything broken or doenst feel well?” She asked as she waved a pisces of wheat, making him focus. “Nah, im as fit as a fiddle” Side eyeing his response she still gave him a piece , hearing him hum in delight as she wrote more notes.
“So no injuries, no pain , nothing?” shaking his head he continued to eat , taking some pieces from her bundle as she reached for the uneatten pieces “Hey! No you get these as a reward for answering me not to eat at your leisure!” She scolded. Reaching as far as she could she grabbed at his hand before he lifted them higher, smirking “Well miss doc i want what i want, and I want my snack” He said before she grabbed his arm, poking a manicured nail at it hand “Well Kendo ill let you have it if you tell me whats wrong, without covering it up deal?” Feeling him flinch at her poking she did it again until he moved away , glaring at her through his bangs that hung low “Fine! Stop poking me though, ya nails hurt! And theres nothing wrong, i just dont like ‘em cows! They stink!” He said as he knelt closer, moving her from his arm. “They stink? How old are you 5? Why do they stink!” [ ] huffed back as he chewed more of his treat, looking to the flustered girl “Im 22 in human years little girl , and like i said they stink! Reeks like open sores and meat” He said as he kept eating , laying in the sun. Thinking over his words it dawned in her what he could be talking about “And what do i smell like Kendo?” [ ] asked, catching the half bull off guard “I dunno, you dont stink, Neither does lady Dem” He said as he turned to her. Leaning over she gave him a piece of wheat again but this time, pushing herself a bit forward, watching as his body shook before he took the piece , eating it. “Well Kendo, my name is [ ] and ill be checking on you moreoften okay? I need to run down to the house but ill be back if that's okay with you?” Silently he shook his head, watching her run off as he opened his still crossed legs, feeling himself unsleeth as he groaned ‘Shit...now why am I gettin turned on’ he thought to himself, rubbing away what he could before the girl came back
As soon as she got to the farm she was met with the eyes of the worrying three, the first to speak being his mother Altine “Oh! [ ] youre back!” She said, the bell on her neck dangling as she ran to the fence “How is my boy? Kendo is he alright?” she asked as Demeter and Milvor came soon after for the report “Well maam i can confirm he is healthy, not is wrong with him the only thing is..” [ ] hesitated as she looked at them “He might have a heat approaching, is this his first one by any chance?” SHe asked as they all looked at eachother, Demeter speaking up “Well not exactly, this is why I kept bringing mortals up here, he wouldnt mate with the cows, and even other hybrids! Nothing! Hed turn his nose up at them all and go back to that field. He actually broke that horn of his fighting a bull from a neighboring farm who wanted to cow that was trying to get his attention” Demeter said, sigh as she saw her nieces blank face , afraid she overwhelmed her “Its alright if you dont think hes fixable [ ] i can-” “No hes fine. I can help him, and i think it wont be that hard either” [ ] said, giving the group a smile. “Watch him for a few days for me , im gonna go back up there with him, see how he is then come back in a few days with some of my things, ill stay here as long as need be to help your son” She said as she gave them all a smile, going inside to get her something to eat. Soon she hear her aunt appear, shuffling about to give her a basket to put her things in “Here, Im so gald helping him is a easy fix” She said sighing happily as she continued “I know he should mate on his own time, but im more concerned for his heath of it all, he doesnt even release into anyone or even by himself” Glancing towards her auntie she took in a breath before saying something “Well, i know it has to be bad now, he even said the er, cow women here stink, so their hormone have to be covered with other bulls or maybe he genuinely doesnt see appeal with them” [ ] said. Thinking it over Demeter gave her an almost alarming look “Well if thats the case just as you arrived he asked me what i was cooking, that something smelt good. I told him I didnt have anything and he just retreated back to his part of the barn before leaving for the field again.” Slowly [ ] realized she might be in for more than she imagines but brushed it off. “Interesting..” She said as she took her full basket “I have an idea, im gonna see if his heat hits its peaking times in a few days, I do plan on staying here if youd have me here?” She asked as a delighted look spread across Demeter’s face “Of course dear child! I missed having you around! Your Father was bad at bringing you over, him and his festivals” Demeter huffed before she poked her nieces cheek “Besides! We can have a girls night, or well er, weeks depending!” She said as the laughed together “Well it's a deal!”
Heading back up the hill she saw that Kendo had moved, facing a running river as he sast in the sun once more, looking content. [ ] smirked to herself before grabbing some of the things she had ; a brush, a lavish soap and a towel. Heading to where the behemoth of a hybrid laid she noticed his ear twitched, before he opened an eye to look back at her. “Hey Doc, ya back.” He said as she gave him a smile, sitting beside his head “Why yes I am. You seem to be enjoying yourself” She teased as he smirked, turning to face her. “Well i do enjoy the sun, keeps me warm nd my hair soft.” Looking him over again she noticed that his hair was always up in a bun but his bangs covering his eyes, a different hue of color, more of a rustic red than his black furred legs. “Well about that...Im gonna give you a bath!” the giant bull flinched at her words, seeing the happy look gracing her face “Oi now look, ‘m fine i dont need no bath” He argued as she pouted “Why sure you do! I know you dont go when the others get theirs, and if that bun of yours is any indication, you need to wash all of that dirt and grime off. Now let me help you” She barked back, pointing the soft looking brush towards his face. He stood up, now overthrowing the girls height as he pointed a finger at her “Now look, I like being this way, it keeps those girls offa me if you clean me now they wont leave me alone!” [ ] sighe before stepping closer, pointing her own small hand at his face, moving closer “Now you listen to me Kendo, I have things to help keep them off of you, this is for your own health! I can leave you here, dirty but your hair and fur is gonna get so matted theyll have to shave you!”
At hearing a potential that hed be shave Kendo flinched, moving his bangs so his soft eyes could meet her determined ones “Theyll shave me? Ion wanna be like the sheep” he said she she gave him a satisfied look. “Well go into the water then and ill make sure you wont!” Reluctantly he sighed, walking into the river as she followed behind, pinning her longer robe so it wouldnt get too wet as she sat at the side of the river. Holding a hand out she waved him closer, the male coming to her as she undid his hair. To her utter surprise it fell down his shoulders, stopping just short of his waist. Gently she pushed his bangs back to see his pretty amberish eyes looking up to her [ ]’ed ones. He had a typical Bull hook through his nose , the gold shining in the warm sun. He was quite handsome, sun kissed skin and a clear face, broad shoulders and a nice body. Even with his mostly human body his horns, tail and ears were bull, on top of his legs and...neithers , that were covered in fur. Softly she traced a scar under his eye, the wound slightly tender as he jumped from the touch. Going to her wrist she tied a string to hold his long bangs up, a giggle falling from her lips as he almost looked like a younger child getting a bath “What're you lookin at me like that for” He huffed as she laughed more, pushing his face together “You look like an upset child is all. Now go ahead and dip in the water for me , ill scrub you after.” Listening to her, Kendo dropped watching as some of the debris and dirt washed off around him as he stood up, shaking his hair “Good enough?” He asked as she shook her head, pouring some of the sopa on the brush as she started to was his chest,making sure to scrub him as clean as she could from land. Sensing her struggle he reached to her, lifting her over his body as she squealed “Sorry, you were just strugglin so i thought i'd help you” Kendo said as [ ] hesitantly started to wash as much as she could, tapping his arm anytime she needed to move. Being up there did help, she was able to was his horns and his hair, revealing the rust orange and copper hair underneath. Surprised she ran her finger though it, giving him a shy smile. “See dont you feel a bit better?” She asked as he shyly nodded, noticing how her clothes clinged to her chest. He reached to put her back on land, coming out of the water himself as he allowed her to scrb his legs and hoofs, the dull black fur coming to life as he watched in awe. She didnt mind helping him, still came to bother him when he said he didnt want help and now she was bathing him. Kendo mulled over how helpful she was, and realized she was more comforting than most. After scrubbing his hoofs shiny she tapped his legs, signaling she was done.
“All right! Now that youre all clean and such Ill make sure you stay this way okay Kendo?” [ ] said as she went back to the basket, pulling out two apples. The bull in question watched as she came back to him, handing him the other one “Here ya go! Thought you could use something sweet” kendo took the apple from the girl, before biting into it, thanking hier softly as they sat in silence. Soon [ ] spoke up, breaking their silet aurora “So...ill be around here the next few days or so, ill probably stay longer, giving how nice it is” She laughed, looking at the curious male beside her “Dont be afraid to ask me for anything okay? Im here to help you” With that Kendo nodded, going back to the apple. Quietly Kendo touched her arm, making [ ] look to him as an unfamiliar look went over his face. Gently herself, [ ] put her hand on his, shaking her head as a signal for him to talk. “Would you mind...pettin me?” he asked before [ ]’s eyes went wide. Now feeling a bit more embarrassed he spoke up again “I have problems going to sleep, ‘ts why i like it out here in the sun, its warm , nd comforting…” Pausing he continued after he got his words together. “You do the same thing like the sun. Youre warm...comforting.. And make me feel sleepy...so if you pet me...ill be comforted to sleep..its what my mama did, but im too big to be in her lap” With that kendo finished, glancing to the girl who gave him a soft look “Of course i can! I have to get pick some more clothes up but once i get back, I can stay with you out here.” Shaking his head Kendo looked back to the river “Ya dont have to sleep outside with me just...put me to sleep” Unable to stop herself [ ] hugged his arm, looking at him through her lashes “Oh cmon you big baby, I dont mind it! Havent slept under the stars since i was a kid!” Brushing off her dress she ran a hand though his thick locs of hair, giving him another warm hug “Ill be back before sundown, now you be good” And with that he watched as his new found friend walked down the hill.
As promised she brought a blanket and joined him, laying under the tree as the large male went to sleep on her lap, contently humming as [ ] ran her fingers through his hair, making Kendo groan as he fell asleep like mentioned, hugging her thighs as he slept the most comfortable he had in weeks. Watching the hybrid sleep she saw all types of scars, some down his back , others on his chest. A few on his arms and only one on his face, plus the broken horn. He obviously got himself into different groups of problems, but he was sweet, not as curt as he expected. Running her fingers down his back she watched him shiver, going to wrap his arms higher around her torso. Giggling as softly as she could [ ] started to braid his hair back in his sleep, the moving under her ceasing as he was well resting once more. Thinking to herself ‘ If he’ll be like this it should be a breeze to help him.’ Oh how wrong she was.
A few days passed with little to no incident , [ ] going around helping with the daily chore and hanging out with her deity auntie. As the two of them sat in the living quarters, drinking a mixed juice that her father set them they heard a bell appear towards the window, it being Kendo’s mother “I'm so sorry to bother you , but i think something is gravely wrong. Kendo is whining in the shed, earlier he even started to-” Before she could finish a thumb came from his shed, followed by a groan “and that, he's been head butting his room” sitting up [ ] looked to his shed, seeing the door shut but large banging still coming from inside “Hey Auntie, is it alright if we could move him to the other field? I dont want his lashing to accidentally hurt anyone here” Coming besides [ ] Demeter chewed at her lip, thinking “Well, if we can stop him then yes, I'd get the boys to move it quickly”. With that answer [ ] got up, heading to the rocking shed. Taking in a breath she knocked, hearing that the groans subsided. The door slowly creaked open, showing a heaving Kendo “[ ].....?” He whispered, looking over her body as she reached to his forehead, pressing her hand against it. Hot, way too hot. “Kendo, sweetie come with me okay? We’re gonna go to the fields and we're gonna move your shed there okay?” Silently he nodded, coming out of his place. He was gasping, chest heaving as his eyes swirled a darker color than normal. Taking the outstretched hand of [ ] his larger fingers curled against it, following the light pull of the girl. Softly, He nudged her back “ ‘M hot..” he said as she looked back at him, making sure the fever wasn't wearing him down. He gave her a weak smile, rubbing the back of her hand “ ‘M alright princess, just hot” Kendo said as she noted how his voice dropped octaves. “Well theyre gonna bring a bigger shed for you out here and ill check on you every hour. Does anything hurt?” [ ] asked as they walked up the hill “Nah, but my horns are ackey.” “Is that why you were bashing them on the shed?” “Yeah...its like trying to scratch an itch you can reach” Kendo sighed, seeing his usual tree coming into view. As the duo got there he dramatically fell under it, pulling [ ] with him. “K-kendo! Careful!” she fussed as he let go of her apologizing as he drifted to sleep. Soon some of the workers had started working on the new roomed shed for him , finishing just before sundown as they would inform Demeter of where she was.
Gently pushing the deep sleeping boy from her lap she went to his new place, checking everything out. It was more of a small home than a shed, filled with a huge bed and a nice aesthetic to them, the touch of the goddess laced through the look of the place. Going around to sort some of the things they brought for Kendo, [ ] felt a presence behind her “whats all this..” the groggy bull said, ducking down to walk into his lavish bedroom “Your new home! I had them build something spacious but also not overwhelming, and these white are just so lovely.” [ ] kept talking as she soon felt two large arms wrap around her torso “ Ya did this for little ol me..?” He whispered as she ran a hand over his forearm. “I did...you need somewhere to relax in this state” She responded, trying to get from his grasp as he tighten it “Uh uh dont leave...tell me whats wrong with me doc..why cant I stop feeling hot...and anytime you come around I...cant help myself” He ended with a groan , burying his face in the shorter girls neck “Well once im sure of you being in a state of need ill be back okay? Just...relax for me and i promise ill be back.” finally convincing him to let go of her waist, not without a pained groan as he went to the bed, hazy eyes glancing over the short dress wearing girl “Get some more rest okay? Im gonna get something to eat and ill be back in the morning. Call me if you need me okay?” [ ] said as he just groaned a meek response, turning to his side.
Earlier the next morning [ ] woke up to an empty house. Stretching she found a neatly written note with some food on the table
Dearest Niece, Im currently headed to your Uncle Poseidon's place, I should be back some time later ; an update on Kendo, hes been begging for you all day, wont let anyone touch him or check on him. He should be awake now but do be warned ; He’s a lot more scatterbrained than usual
Auntie Demeter
Reading over the note again [ ] sighed, putting on her more comfortable and workable dress as she headed up to his new little house on his hill, the sound of groaning and whines coming to her ears as she got to his door. Seeing it ajar she pushed it open slightly, the place dark except from a crack of light coming from the window. Going to the shades she opened them, hearing a hiss from the bed. “Kendo its me..[ ]?” She called out as the wild set of hair came into view. He was even more disheveled, eyes filled over as he looke to the girl before growling, crawling out of the bed to her. With a gasp she was in his arms, body shaking as she was met with unnaturally feral eyes from the boy. “You left me yesterday..” he rapeseed out, burying his face in her neck again as she grabbed at his thick neck “Kendo honey, i told you id be back this morning didnt i?” She calmly said as he held her tighter, pushing her chest to his “Dont care, ‘ts too long” Realizing why he was so needy [ ] tried to reason with him “Well im sorry love, here lets sit down on the bed” Trying to get him to move she walked forward only to feel something large and hot push into her bare thigh. Nervously she looked down only to be faced to what she feared it was ; His hanging member. A wicked laugh came from above her as she was met with his ever lust driven eyes, a hand of his going to cup her ass and pull her closer “See what you left me with? No matter how hard i fuck my fist i cant cum, it wont come out” He whined and burried his face again, rocking himself on her thigh “Please ill do anythin..youre the only one who sgotten me like this...the only one i want..[ ] please princess help me” Overwhelmed but the situation she tried to pull back, eyes searching his “K-kendo youre getting yourself worked up relax-” Without warning he picked her up, making her screech as he brought her crouch to his face, inhaling as he whimpered, reaching down to his growing dick “Fuck you smell good, like flowers...and sweets..” Letting his tongue roll out he sucked over her panties, making her squeal as she gripped his messy hair “N-no kendo put me down i need to help y-you!” She moaned as his tongue flicked over her clit, a mutual groan coming from both of them. Soon a hard tug to his hair resonated, cause him to put her down as she barely touched the floor, hand grabbing his biceps “Kendo please, please sit down youre overworking yourself.” Trying to calm her racing heart she saw how hazed he was, his hand coming to wrap around his visually throbbing head, stroking himself as tight and fast as he could, looking at the awe struck girl infront of him. His hips lifted up as he was chasing a high but he soon groaned, thrusting meekly in his fist “I-I cant, fuck I cant do it doll, ‘t hurts...p-please” Finally snapping from her haze she got closer to Kendo, hand still trying to milk himself as she put her hand over his, stoping the motion.
“K-ken..ill help you okay? Youre gonna rub yourself raw at this pace..” nervously [ ] pulled his hand away, precum coating it as she gulped. He was huge, red and swollen tip curved in the right places. Even with his bull heritage he was still humanly manageable, but with a lot of work to try and get it to fit. With her staring at the intimidating size it twitched , curving up to his belly button as he gave her a lop sided snarl “ Cmon darlin, he... er, we need you . ya keep staring make me feel a bit exposed” He laughed as [ ] gave her own light chuckle. Facing her fears she wrapped a hand around his tip, a hurting yelp falling from Kendo at the touch made her eyes flicker to him but what she saw was pure lust, eyes blown with his tongue licking over his lips “Y-yes finally...shit I-i can feel somethin” Kendo couldnt help himself. Reaching down he grabbed her other hand , wrapping them tightly around his tip as he thrusted between them. “Mhmm im cumin, im gonna cum o-oh shit” As soon as she twisted her wrist to help him he felt himself twitch , spurts of warm cum splattering on [ ]’s face and the floor a he gave her a nervous laugh “S-shit doll face yer good...im sorry i couldnt hold it in..” he said shyly as [ ] gave him a sympathetic look, stroking over his still throbbing head. “[ ] please...can I fuck you? I-I promise ill go slow its juts the smell of you is..mhmm intoxicating” Kendo pulled her up from her knees, pressing his mouth against her clinging panties ,pulling them with his teeth. [ ] squeaked, grabbing his hair as he pushed her hips closer, trying to lick her. “W-wait ill take em off” Pushing at his shoulders she pulled the piece he had in his mouth out, sliding the flimsy lace as she came a bit closer, a growl coming from his lips as he pushed her dress higher, finally able to taste her. Throwing one leg then the next on his shoulder kendo fell back, making her fall onto his lips.
[ ] let a pitched moan come out, startled by his rummaging in between her thighs , his diligent uskcing on her clit taking a toll as she came, bucking her hips onto his mouth. Swallowing her juices Kendo flipped her on her stomach, pushing the fabric of her dress up and over her shoulder to release her covered chest, now exposed “mhmm i want more of that sweet nectar baby why dont you give it to me?” whispering in her ear and now bucking his even harder dikc between her small lips [ ] started to panic “K-Ken wait I dont think youll fit!” ignoring her thrashing Kendo looked over her body, seeing how she shook at every stroke of his tip against her sopping core “I told ya ill be gentle, hold still [ ]...i wouldnt hurt my mate” The heaviness of those word took over [ ]’s body as she looked back to him, only to see the save behemoth size push against her ring of muscles. Agonizingly slow he pushed, letting his tip slide in as he pushed each small inch he could in, a whine falling from them both. Once he was halfway in he slowly thrust his hips, causing the girl to yelp “I-its alright i got ya okay? Youre fine...its okay im here” Constantly praising her , Kendo was able to slip more into her, each mini thrust pushing him a bit closer to her, the sounds of squishing and pleasure filled moans filling the room. Becoming overwhelmed at almost being full [ ] pushed her hips back to take the rest, making Kendo yelped and [ ] moaned, the sudden feeling of him bottoming out almost too much as he placed his hand on her stomach, feeling him brush her cervix. Swinging his hips more fluidly he started to pounder her even more, gripping her neck as he pushed her deeper in the bed “Fuck yeah i knew youd be my perfect little minx, taking me so well i cant wait to see you swollen with my babies” He huskily whispered , the stretched out girl too blissed at taking him whole to care about his words.
“I bet youd love being my mate, wouldnt have to lift a finger for anything , id take good care of ya..” Continuing his beating against her cervix he felt something strong hed never felt before, a blind need to cum hitting him like a train “mhm..please let me breed you, this pussys’ mine, all i ever wanted...ill make you a cute little house wife hm? Make you swell with cute little us running about.” Feeling her weakening clench over him he reached for that bundle of nerves, switching his hips to hit even deeper, his throbbing dick pushing against that sponge in her walls. Crying out [ ] fell lower, feeling him slip impossibly deeper as he sped up.” Cmon [ ] , babygirl cum for me..give me it..t-then i can give you what you want yeah? Fill ya to the brim so you can bear me a strong child….”Finally at that the little sense of control snapped coming from a particularly hard push and roll of her clit she was whining , grabbing the arm beside her head as angry red lines welted up. Feeling her hit her peak Kendo got to his knees , nursing her bud as she tried to tug him away, thighs shaking as teary eyes looked down to his fierce lust filled one. As soon as she started whimpering and pulling her hips away he stopped, scrubbing his tip along her folds as he entered without too much pull, [ ]’s mouth falling open “Mh..i'm so close baby...just wanted to look at you when I fill you full..” Kendo felt his tip twitch, making his hips stutter as he picked his pace up again, watching as her arms went are far as they could to his back, stretching his shoulders as he came with a growl, and almost audible sound of him pumping in her heard as she weakly pulled him closer, their lips meeting in a intimate kiss.
With care he pulled from her lips, seeing her eyes fill up again as he kissed tears away “Its alright...its okay ‘m here princess...its alright..I didnt hurt you did I?” Kendo asked as he looke at her slightly bulged stomach, a satisfied smirk on his lips “ Hey [ ]...” He started as she gave a weak hum he continued “Be my mate..I know i didnt ask before filling you bu...id be honored to make such a caring woman my mate and wife...treat you just like my father does my mom..…” He said, nuzzling her cheek before [ ] pulled his face up, kissing him lightly as she gave him a tired smile, rubbing his cheeks “I-id be honored to be your mate..take good care of me okay? Or Auntie Demeter has your head..” Laughing he kissed her lips again, sealing their new deal
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ladydevoir · 3 years
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Weiss coming out as trans to her team?
The halls of Beacon were quiet as Weiss walked through, though she was glad for the peace as her mind was swimming in thought. She was silently dreading returning to her dorms, knowing what was waiting for her. But, she had decided tonight was the night, and she would not cower away from what she had decided to do. Best to get it over with rather than continuing to let her dread grow. Soon a voice broke her train of thought. “Hey Weiss~!” She looked back as the owner of the voice caught up to her, a plastic bag in hand. “Hello Nora, It’s good to see you. I see your trip to Vale was productive.” Nora beamed back at her with her usual energy. “Good to see you too~ And heck yeah it was~ Me and Ren found that cute coffee shop you told us about, Jaune actually managed to not throw up on the ride there, though he was wasnt as lucky on the way back, and me and Pyrrha went shopping for our dresses for the dance~ Oh, and here’s the stuff you wanted~” Nora held up the back for Weiss who took it and looked through it, a set of razors and shaving cream along with some skin care for after. “Thank you very much Nora. Im afraid I was starting to run low, and our team won’t be free to travel to Vale for a few days. Please, what do I owe you?” As she began to sift through her bag for her purse, Nora held up her hand. “Nuh uh uh, you dont owe me anything. Girls like us gotta stick together after all, and you’d do the same for me~” Nora’s usual high energy voice had softened as she spoke, to which Weiss was grateful. Since coming to Beacon she had been nervous about the truth coming out about her, thankfully Nora had seen through her immediately and been a true pillar of support. Weiss had been surprised and rather relieved when Nora had revealed she was just like her, and in moments like this it was wonderful to have someone to talk to and help her without any worry about questions she was not particularly wanting to answer. As if sensing some unease, Nora gently squeezed her shoulder and nodded her head towards a small bench in the hall. As the two sat down, Nora spoke up. “Hey, you doing ok? You seem off.” Weiss sighed and nodded. “I am just...nervous. I promised myself that tonight would be the night I tell the rest of my team, the truth about me.” Nora watched Weiss’s expression, seeing the build up of worry on her face. “You know the others aren’t going to suddenly turn on you just because of this, right? I cant imagine this would be a big deal for Ruby or Yang, and I doubt Blake would mind really.” Weiss let out another sigh and leaned her head back against the wall, closing her eyes before responding. “I am fully aware that no one on my team will be upset or treat me any different.” “So...whats the problem then?” Weiss looked down, her eyes darting left and right to make sure there was no one else listening, before she spoke. “When Blake accidentally revealed that she was a Faunus, I….did not handle the news with grace. I accused her of having lied to us, keeping the truth hidden from us. And while I did apologise for it afterwards, I still cannot take back what I said. And that is why I am worried. I was so quick to accuse her of lying and hiding the truth and yet here I am, having done the very same thing since starting Beacon.” Her hands gripped one another as she looked down, shaking slightly. “My standing with Blake and the others is not exactly on stable terms, and I am afraid that revealing myself after all I said to Blake might cause more strife between us.” Nora listened quietly as she gave Weiss’s back a gentle rub. Thinking carefully before responding. “If you’re this worried, then why now? Why not wait?” Weiss took a deep breath and looked straight ahead, as if steeling herself for it. “Because I owe it to my team to be honest with them, especially after how I overreacted to Blake. I cannot allow myself to hide the truth any longer, even if…” She looked down at her hands, starting to tremble. Instantly Nora knelt down in front of her and gently cupped her face, speaking softly. “Hey hey, dont go working yourself
up over ifs and maybes. Sure, you said some things, but you said sorry, and they forgave you. Im sure they wont be bothered by this. And if things go south, hey you can always just join our team~! Though we’d need to work out how to include W to JNPR~” Weiss let out a sniffle and smiled, raising her head from Nora’s hands and slowly standing, Nora instantly hugging the girl, to which Weiss reciprocated. “Nora, thank you so much. You have been a wonderful friend to me and I cannot repay you enough.” Nora pulled back from the hug with a wide smile, her usual energy returning. “Hey come-on, thats what friends do, we look out for one another~” Weiss picked up the bag from the ground and nodded back, the two girls walking back to the dorms, idle chatter filling the time before they arrived, Nora giving a big thumbs up before entering her room, leaving Weiss with her hand on the handle, taking a deep breath before entering the room, barely having time to duck as a pillow came flying towards her, narrowly missing as she looked upon the scene. Ruby holding a pillow and swinging hazardly at Yang, who weaved out of the way and returned with her own swing, before the two registered Weiss and stopped. “Hey Weiss! You wanna join in~? Blake might join if its two on two~” Ruby chirped excitedly, her energy seemingly limitless. “Yeah come-on princess, I’ll be more than happy to whoop your butt as well as my little sis’s~” Yang said with a smirk on her face, before dodging a well timed throw from Ruby. Weiss sighed and picked up the pillow that had nearly hit her and closed the door, shaking her head. “Honestly it is a wonder how the two of you are considering becoming huntresses when you act like little children.” “Ah cmon Weiss-y, you gotta have a little fun now and then, whats the point of life if you stay ridged all the time~?” Weiss shook her head and made her way to her bed, placing the pillow onto it and sitting, restless as her worry was building up again. “Weiss? Are you..ok?” Weiss looked up startled at the last member of the team over on her bed, slowly closing her book and focusing her attention on her. “You seem….kinda tense.” Weiss took a breath to help calm her nerves as her other two teammates looked over, all showing a similar sign of concern. “Actually Blake, I need to talk to you. All of you, if that is ok?” Yang flopped down onto Blake’s bed and looked over at her, while Ruby sat down beside her, all eyes on her. “Whats wrong Weiss? Blake’s right, you’re looking real tense.” Weiss’s eyes focused on her hands as she fidgeted, trying to come up with the right words. She silently cursed herself, this should not be this hard. A hand coming to rest on her knee drew her from her thoughts as she looked over at her partner, a soft-yet warm smile on her face. “It’s ok Weiss, whatever’s wrong, you know we’re here for you, right?” Weiss felt herself relax slightly, thankful for her partner’s kind words. “Okay, I do not know how to properly say this, so please, be patient with me.” With a reaffirming nod from Ruby and an audible “Mhm” from Yang, she continued. “The truth is...I have not been entirely honest with the rest of you. And for that, I am sorry to all of you, but mostly, I am sorry to Blake.” Blake looked over, confused. “Weiss, what are you-” Weiss raised her hand to stop Blake, taking a breath. “I was not at all kind to you when you revealed the truth about yourself, despite the fact that in doing so, I was being extremely hypocritical myself. Ive been hiding a truth myself, and after all that has been said and done, I feel I owe it to all of you to be honest.” Weiss took a quick glance at her team, Yang’s expression was clear confusion, Ruby was still giving her the same calming smile, while Blake had become more focused on her. She took a deep breath and continued. “The truth is, I….was not born a girl.” Weiss waited for a response from the others, but when none came, she looked up at her three teammates. Yang looked somewhat shocked, Blake still had her focused look on her, though it was clear she hadnt
expected that. Ruby however, didnt seem shocked or surprised in the slightest. “So, like Nora?” Weiss nodded, and to her surprise found herself being wrapped in her partner’s embrace. “Aww Weiss, you dont have to be nervous, its not like we’d think of you any diferent, ya know?” Yang looked over, shaking off her shocked look and sitting forward. “Yeah, Rubes is right, you’re still our icy princess after all, right Blake?” Blake looked over at Weiss, her expression no longer one of shock, but of understanding. “You were worried I’d be mad at you, werent you?” Ruby and Yang looked to one another as Weiss nodded slightly. “I acted like you lying to us about yourself was such a big deal when I have been lying this entire time.” Weiss continued to hang her head. “Its ok Weiss, really. You already apologised more than enough times for me to know you mean it. And I get it, really. Growing up where you did, I know that kind of thinking isnt easy to get rid of.” Blake shifted herself and stood up. “But, you’re wrong about something.” Weiss looked up hesitantly as Blake stepped over to her, kneeling down in front of her. “You haven’t lied to any of us.” Weiss looked taken aback, not sure what to make of that. It was far from what she had expected Blake to say. “I...I am not sure I follow.” Blake smiled at her softly, resting her hands gently over Weiss’s. “You havent lied to us, because you arent pretending to be something you arent. You’re a girl Weiss, even if you weren’t born one. You haven’t hidden anything from us. From day one, you have been honest to us.” Yang soon walked over, sitting on the other side of Weiss. “Blake’s right, ya know? You’ve always been honest with us about who you are, and you didnt have to feel like you owed us to tell us.” She felt her eyes begin to well up, she knew they would accept her but she had fully expected Blake to be mad at her. To find not only was she not mad, but giving Weiss words of kindness and understanding as she had, it felt overwhelming. Said team was quick to embrace her as she felt a few tears flow, a small smile on her face. “T-thank you, all of you. I-I suppose I should not have been worrying so much over this.” Ruby gave her a gentle squeeze. “Well, worrying about things too much is something you’re best at.” “Hey!” They all laughed as they remained in their embrace, Weiss giving a gentle chuckle. Of course Nora has been right, she shouldn’t have been worried about hypothetical ifs and maybes, especially not with her team. A team that, day by day, Weiss would consider more and more her real family. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Whooo boy, this, this was a tough one. Im proud of how her talk with Nora went at the beginning, I felt like I wrote that well, and yeah I HC Nora as trans. But writing her coming out to her team, I kept erasing and redoing parts because I really did not know how to do it right. This is one I feel like I should come back to when ive gotten some more experience writing.
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trshpando · 3 years
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Rewriting Twilight (2009) cause I’m bored
- I may or may not be looking into this as a modern thing bc fuck the 2000s lmfaoooo so let’s say... 2017? that works right ?
- Okay, starting off, can we pLEASE give Renee a better reason for ABANDONING HER TEENAGE DAUGHTER? literally just the while leaving to be on the road thing just, pisses me off so badly
- okay okay okay hold on if i have to go into that route to fit with the story🙄 can we at least do it so that renee and phil take bella to forks instead of just being like “yup here’s your plane ticket see ya whenever” like renee at least takes bella and helps her settle in, even if she and charlie aren’t on the best of terms they’ll get along for their daughter
- growing up, charlie was way more involved with bella. she would spent several weeks during summer with him in forks, and the occasional time in several other places given that charlie got the time off
- while in forks, bella and charlie would spend time with the blacks; billy, rebecca, rachel, and jacob. she and the twins were closer than she and jacob ever would be, but the four of them were always disappointed when bella had to return to arizona
- bella and renee were like a perfect lil mother-daughter duo up until bella realized how lonely her mother was and encouraged her to date. although she was the one to encourage her, there was an immediate shift in their relationship
- when bella moved to forks, she hadn’t seen charlie for years—having decided herself to just, stop visiting. the few days renee was spending in forks with her were very much, as the kids say, awkward as fuck
- the boys in the high school weren’t just, so attracted to her? like have you been a new kid in a school? you’re the interest for like a week or two and then everybody is like eh whatever
- she still met mike, jessica, and angela and whoever the other guy is, um his name isn’t on the wiki so pardon me and they are absolute best friends, minus mike who 100% has a crush on her from the moment he sees her
- ERIC HIS NAME IS ERIC
- jessica, angela and bella totally have girl nights and you cannot tell me otherwise i mean theyre 17 ofc theyre gonna have girl nights and hangouts all the time
- jessica and angela help bella settle into the school, angela actually asks for bellas help for tips for the newspaper from time to time
- CULLEN TIME BB
- bella and edward are intrigued with one another but after that one day in science (biology? idk science class let’s go) bella thought he was kind of a massive dick and didn’t want anything to do with him, especially after jessica mentioned that he was totally closed off from everyone except his family
- okay fr cullen time
- i 100% am keeping the stories of emmett rosalie esme and carlisle cause yes
- one thing i do want to change, my girl rosalie is poc<3 fuck that white cullen vampire bullshit
- jasper was nOT a confederate soldier, fUCK THAT he was drafted, upset about it, but he still tried his best to make his country proud—which maria took advantage of.
- alice is poc too<3 we love poc women in this home<3<3
- (im only saying poc the rest is up to you<3>)
- can we pUHLEASE have the cullens act like regular people? instead of “oh those foster siblings and their love lives, oh dr cullen adopt me pls” can it be like, yeah carlisle and esme are foster parents and the only ones they’ve really “adopted” are edward and alice. rosalie and jasper are twins, and they just kind of have permission to live with the cullens and then emmett comes from let’s say an abusive home and the cullens were like wow fuck that shit we give you shelter AND THATS LESS WEIRD THAN FOSTER SIBLING LOVE
- AND THEY DONT SPARKLE IN THE FUCKING SUN, PLEASE
- okay back to regular programming
- edward still saves bella from getting crushed, and bella tries to talk to him about it but after edward is rude once again bella just says fuck you and bounces off
- jessica angela and bella say fuck boys and decide to do a girls group to prom bc my girls are besties
- edward knows that bella is his mate but he is pushing her away bc of her being human and he’s hurting bc of it
- despite his protests, alice befriends bella on her own and becomes close to her, with bella even inviting alice to join her and the girls to girls night — alice 100% tries to invite rosalie, but she only goes when she has nothing to do
- victoria james and laurent are still 100% tracking the cullens
- jessica angela bella alice and rosalie all go dress shopping. rosalie goes for the dresses while alice goes to watch over bella for edward. bella still detaches from the group, and gets harassed by that group but ITS ROSALIE THAT SAVES HER bc fuck if she’s gonna let another woman go through what she went through
- it’s through alice and rosalie that bella realizes the truth about the cullens (with the help jacob and his lil group making comments about the cullens)
- alice invites bella over to the house a lot, mostly trying to get edward to get close to her but it mainly just became a thing of bella getting close to literally everyone but edward bc he’s a pussy and doesnt wanna be near her out of fear of hurting her
- it isn’t until the baseball game (which rosalie thoughtfully invited bella to) and james victoria and laurent attack that edward finally admits that he is attracted to bella but at this point she’s like yeah that’s cool but you’ve been nothing but rude to me so
- as much as it pains him, he settles on just being friends with her
- the same tricky james story is the same. he tricks her to the ballet studio and tries to kill her blah blah blah
- edward tries to suck the venom out of bella’s system and nearly kills her in the process; rosalie and carlisle practically have to drag edward off of her, with rosalie taking him out of the building while carlisle takes care of bella
- everything is happily ever after, bella is in the hospital but edward isn’t there. he can’t trust himself around bella anymore, nor does he want to be near her after having almost killed her, though she doesn’t blame him cause he was really just trying to save her life
- bella still goes to prom, but it’s as a group instead; her, jessica, angela, mike, eric, and tyler (the guy that almost killed her with his car lmao) all go as a group.
- the cullens be there too with edward watching over bella but the moment she tries to talk to him, edward bounces.
- victoria still watches over, a plan already set in motion to kill bella as revenge for the cullens killing james
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kaz11283 · 3 years
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Chapter 7
Warnings: slight cuss words, some angst if you squint
Summary: after the blow up during breakfast your more confused now than you ever was, after the night you had and now flames shooting from your hands theres only one person that you trust being around.
Loki Masterlist
Fire and Ice Masterlist
~~~~
"Theres the girl i remember most." Loki said smiling down at you.
"What the hell is going on? What are you talking about?" You asked looking back at him.
Steve got up to stand beside you. "Y/n, your eyes. They changed color." He answered confused. "Tony we need to let the others know. Wanda can help her understand whats going on." Loki turned his head dropping his hands from your face.
"You under estimated me when I told you she could be dangerous. You decided to bring her back, to reunite us. I told you she was powerful but no one listened. Now? Now you want a mear mortal to teach her how to use her magic?" Loki asked threateningly walking toward Steve. Steve stood there glaring at him.
"Yes, yes I do. Wanda knows whats she is doing just as much as you do."
"Yeah, girl that still has no idea what the hell is going on sitting right here." Your heart was beating so fast you thought it was about to beat out of your chest, the room was spinning. "And not that any of you fine gentlemen care but im pretty sure I'm about to pass out." You grabbed your head sitting back down in your chair.
All three of them came rushing to you. Tony giving you a damp rag to whip your face, Steve standing there worried.
"My Dear, you must calm down. Just that little burst of magic probably drained you. Deep breaths, I want you to look at me. Not at them, me. Eye contact, now breath with me." He took your hand and placed it on his chest so you could feel him breathing and could copy him. "In." He took a long breath in. "Now out." He said blowing out the breath. "I want you to answer me honestly y/n, how much sleep did you get last night?"
You kept eye contact with him as you shook your head causing him to sigh. "None, I.... I couldnt sleep. I just tossed and turned till it was time for my class."
"Come with me. We need to get you in bed. That little display probably whiped you out thats why your so exahusted." He said offering you his hand and helping you stand. He placed your hand in the crook of his arm and started to lead you out.
"Hey, no. No no no nope. Steve can take her. You can stay right here." Tony said putting his hand on Loki's shoulder.
"If you honestly think for one second that I am going to take her up there and ravish her aginst her will then you are highly mistaken." Loki spat at him yanking his shoulder away from him. "Asguardians would never ever do that to a woman." He placed his other hand on top of your to lead out from the room.
"Im sorry Loki." You said as you walked quietly back to your room leaning aginst him.
He laughed lightly before looking down at you. "What could you even be sorry for? You havent done anything."
"If I wasnt here there wouldnt be this much fighting. You would have to be reliving all of those memories that you have with a completely diffrent me. You wouldnt be having to practically carry me back to my room." He stopped turning to you.
"There would still be fighting between me and Tony, I absolutly hate that man. I have relived those memories day in and day out since we were seperated. And I dont mind carrying you, you weigh far less than Thor and ive had to carry him to bed a few times after he has gotten to drunk to walk." He laughed. "Come lets get you to your room so that I can take advantage of you." He shuddered st the thought.
"Hello Lady y/n, Loki. How are you this morning?" Thor asked walking from his room. He took notice of your exhausted stated and stepped forward grabbing your bedroom door for Loki to help you walk through.
"Im tired. Did you know that I could shoot blue flames out of my hands? Ya know what, nevermind, of course you knew. I just didnt." You let go of Lokis arm and stumbled to your bedroom leaning on the side of the wall. Both men tried stepping forward but you raised your hand stopping them. "I've got this." You mumbled slamming the door to your room and falling on your bed passing out instantly.
"What happened?" Thor asked turning to Loki. Loki was proped on the arm of the couch with his arms crossed.
"She got upset this morning during breakfast and her flames appeared." Loki sighes deeply falling back onto the couch. "Theres more though, brother, it seems as if the more time she spends with me the more of her old self awakens. Its as if my power is slowly waking hers up."
"But Loki, isnt that a good thing? Thats what we have all wanted. Thats what she wants. She wants to know her past." Thor asked sitting beside him.
"No, thats what you have all wanted. The more of her power she regains the more powerful sge becomes. Thor, what if that is not a good thing at all. What if she turns back into the person that she was before the allfather whiped her memory and tossed her here? I honestly dont know what to do." He said leaning his head back.
"But brother, what if this time you show her how to use her magic and shes still the same person or even better for that matter. What if she decides to do good instead of evil?"
"Thor, do me a favor. Tony and Pepper are taking the others to the new compound today to show us all our rooms and to have a 'cook out' to rest and relax. Will you make sure that the three of us have our own wing? I want to make sure to keep her and the others safe if anything was to happen."
"That sounds like a wonderful plan brother." Thor answered with a smile walking to the door. "I am assuming that your joyful self will be staying here to keep an eye on her?"
"Of course brother. That and the fsct that I simply dont want to go." Loki said causing a book to appear, crossing one leg over the other. "But do give my best to the others."
Chapter 8
~~~~~
Tag list:
@high-functioning-lokipath
@serpentargo
@drbaureid
@poetic-fiasco
@kgirardin
@sophlubbwriting
@supbeeches
@rosaline-black
@jesuswasnotawhiteman
@natandersonnla
@delightfulheartdream
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Text
Ya know, I've been thinking about why a lot of the goth stuff I used to love doesnt appeal to me much anymore- looking through my old pinterest fashion board is just sort of... eh... to me as of late, and I havent listened to the old goth bands much either. It's kind of sad, and I wondered if I was getting over goth. After proudly proclaiming it wasnt a phase and I'd always be this way for so long, it's kind of upsetting! But I came to a realization-
Everything I used to really "LOVE" about goth is the influencer shit that was sold to me as a teen, and the bits of the subculture that love to hate everything and everyone. The "I dont have to look the part or listen to the music or anything I can just IDENTIFY as goth!! Bigit!!" And the "if you dont listen to three bands no ones heard of and know the personal lives of their band members burn in hell for calling yourself goth, intruder!!"
The old fashion I liked was all expensive as hell corporate shit and "glam" makeup looks that were a trendy thing at the time and required lots of expensive products to try and replicate. All the models/photos were touched up in post, and each one was sponsored by some cookie cutter nu goth fashion brand. All of them used the same filters, and looking back I couldn't tell you which one was which because it was all a slurry of the same content. A blur of black and white and the occasional religious symbol they didnt know the meaning of.
And I fell for both of these things because I was a dumb teen and dumb teens fall for anything that can give them a sense of belonging. (Im really sorry teens, but you'll agree once you're older, trust me)
So then I start to drift from that- I dont have any want to be precise and "glamorous" or made up, I dont want to spend tons of money on clothes and makeup, hell, I barely want anything to do with most "feminine" things anymore (but that's a story for another day). And honestly, maybe that's why.
The politics and new aesthetics of goth just aren't for me. Not one bit. They suck. They're soulless, tired, and bitchy as all hell. And as I've gotten into new things and started to come together as a person, that part of my past has become, well, ugly. Everytime I tried to replicate that style and those things, I felt subpar. It was awful.
I still love the music, but it's on the back burner as I discover new things I love and return to old musical flings.
And nowadays, I look to trad goth photos from the earliest beginnings of goth-
And boy, do those look a lot more appealing. The character, the love, the messiness. That I can behind. Just being yourself in a tiny, tiny little subculture finding its wings? Hell yeah.
Maybe this rant wasnt necessary, in fact I'm pretty sure it's all just dumb rambles. But I wanted that out of my system. This thing we built isnt all that nice anymore, so I'm just going to circle the mess in my own little bubble while it hopefully sorts itself out. Lemme know when that happens, yeah? And tell me what ya think. Well, uh...
Fuck.
-D
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