#??? i just wanted mcu to fix the story and do my man a little better

[serpentinespider]

Earth-6198 Flash ref!! Yippee!!

His appearance and personality are based almost entirely off of MCU Flash (with some of my own personal touches obviously), though the reasons he acts the way he acts are different. I also took several aspects from the comics, story-wise. He’s probably the character I’ve put the most thought into for this AU. I love him dearly :]

Abbreviated info under the cut! (It’s still pretty long, though.) Content warning for ableism.

I wouldn’t call Flash a bully exactly, because that would imply aggression; he’s just, well, a teenage boy. He also comes from a pretty wealthy family, which makes him entitled, plus his parents don’t really give him any positive attention. He makes insensitive jokes and generally tries to keep himself as the center of attention because he’s insecure and seeks approval from his peers. Will do pretty much anything to be liked, and if that fails he’ll act out for attention. He’s very resentful of anyone he considers to be smarter or “better” than him. Flash has a running rivalry with Harry Osborn. Harry is somewhat GNC, has stereotypically “cringe” interests, and is disabled (t1d) so he’s an easy target for Flash’s mean jokes. (Flash thinks that he’s “allowed” to make ableist jokes at others’ expense because he himself is disabled.) 

Flash has cerebral palsy which affects his fine motor skills and ability to walk. His parents got him into physical therapy as early as possible, and he responded well to it— but not well enough for their liking. In Harrison Thompson’s mind, the goal wasn’t to improve Flash’s quality of life, but to “fix” him. Flash grew up with his parents constantly looking down on him, insinuating that his disabilities were his own fault. Sentiments like “you just have to work harder to compensate; if you fall behind, it’s because you’re not trying hard enough” were common. He’s taken that mentality to heart, and has very little self-worth + large amounts of pent-up stress and anger that he takes out at anyone else who is also “abnormal” (hence his meanness towards Harry). 

He has also latched onto Spider-Man as a more… positive(?) reflection of these feelings— his father, who’s a police chief, hates Spidey, so liking him is like Flash’s small way of going against the stuff his parents say (even if it’s subconscious/he doesn’t fully know that’s why). 

In sophomore year, Flash dated Felecia Hardy. They were the world’s most obnoxious couple, always getting in very public fights, breaking up but then getting back together dramatically a week later, etc. Felecia and Flash both have huge crushes on Spider-man, leading Flash to have a sexuality crisis and Felecia to break up with him for good after a few months of dating.

Black Cat was commissioned by an anonymous benefactor to steal an “alien clone” from Alchemax… she’d never done anything NEARLY on that level, but she was being offered a lot of money so she agreed. She did manage to steal the thing, but the deal fell through, and suddenly she had one lab-grown alien and no money to show for it.  At a loss for anything else to do, panicking a little, Felicia dumped the alien onto the only person she could think of: her ex-boyfriend Flash. 

Now, despite what his parents might tell him, Flash is very smart, and figured out what the thing was. Flash is, at first, very hyped about this. His first thought is, of course, to become a vigilante like his idol Spider-Man. Flash has a strong desire to be useful— not in the “I want to help other people” sense but in the “I need to prove to others that I have worth” sense. So, he crafted the Anti-Venom identity for himself!

Around this time, Spider-Man was in the process of fighting his first big villain, Hobgoblin, so the two ended up teaming up to try and take her down (in the least violent way possible). This caused some internal conflict for both Flash and Spidey… 

Flash centered his whole identity around "fitting in" to the point that he actually has no identity of his own. He doesn’t know what he likes, he has no concept af his own style outside of mimicking others that he sees as influential, obviously the most prominent of these being Spider-Man. Which obviously comes with its own twisted irony since Spidey himself is so insecure in his own masculinity (mainly because he’s trans). The two of them were sort of trapped in this feedback loop of insecurity and validation when they first teamed up... Spidey longs for connection, but was unable feel comfortable around Flash as he felt like he has to perform to live up to Flash’s expectations. Meanwhile Flash had based his whole personality off of liking Spider-Man and put on this macho facade to try and impress him. But that just made Spidey feel more inferior, afraid he isn’t passing well enough, etcetera… their dynamic made even more complex by Flash’s very obvious (and unrequited) crush on Spidey.  They’re awful, I love them :3

[scattered-winter]

Tell me abt ur correct mcu timeline

this is completely divorced from marvel comics since the mcu is a totally different continuity. it's my house now <3

Captain America: the First Avenger

1941 - Steve gets his powers (age 23) 1942 - the Howling Commandos are organized August 1945 - Bucky "dies" (age 28) approx. a week later - Steve crash-lands in the ocean (age 27) September 1945 - WWII ends

Captain Marvel

Nick Fury doesn't lose his eye to a fucking CAT. instead, he loses it to someone close to him who he once trusted before losing his eye in a climatic battle that forever changed how he deals with people. because in THIS house I don't fucking make my badass characters into a fucking JOKE (forever pissed at how they built Nick Fury up as this badass amazing character who is implied to have Been Through Shit to make him as slow to trust as he is today and then when the time came to shed some light on his story they....turned all that into a joke with the fucking cat. biting tearing maiming.)

Iron Man 1+2

Tony Stark does his thing and is really really obnoxious about it. idk it's been a while since I've seen these but that's pretty much all he does so w/e

Thor

chef's kiss. you stay exactly the way you are, thor 1

The Avengers

Phil Coulson being revealed to not be dead near the end, and thus leading into Agents of SHIELD would be kinda cool narratively, but it's not a must because Coulson's reveal in AoS is pretty badass as it is.

Thor: the Dark World

another chef's kiss

Iron Man 3

Tony Stark moves on from Iron Man and destroys all his suits, and actually sticks to the decision. he only appears in future movies as tech/support, if that. sincerely, someone who can barely stand Tony as he is and fucking hates it when he completely takes over someone else's movie :/

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Ultron is still the main antagonist because it's a fascinating concept, and the rest of the movie largely happens as written except Quicksilver doesn't get killed off because let's be real that was CHEAP. if you're gonna kill off your characters at LEAST do it in a believable way smh.

Captain America: Civil War

this is . a fun one. Tony isn't in the movie at all (<3), and there is very little conflict/screentime with the Avengers because that's a stupid ass thing to do in a Captain America movie. the plot centers around Steve and Co. evading global authorities while trying to prove Bucky's innocence in the UN bombing. no stupid Tony-centric plots and petty arguments in my good Christian Captain America movie

Black Widow

idk I wanted to see her early days in SHIELD. I wanna see how she met Clint and how two very very mistrustful people got to be so close. to be clear I don't ship them and I love their friendship so ideally this is for the aros and the aces <3333

Black Panther

chef's kiss. couldn't make it better if I tried <333

Spiderman: Homecoming

TONY!!! ISN'T!!!! IN IT!!!! <3!!!!!!! instead, the story focuses on Peter Parker (already operating as Spiderman since we've seen Uncle Ben die approx. 3700000 times) trying to become a true hero blah blah you get the idea

Thor: Ragnarok

CHEF'S!!!! KISS!!!!! from this point on, he never fights with a hammer (or hammer equivalent) because the entire POINT of the movie was to establish that HE DOESN'T NEED ONE !

Avengers: Infinity War/Endgame

hooooo boy. I can't even think of a way to fix this one. it's just not there anymore <3333333 and I also can't fix anything that comes after these movies just because it's all so convoluted and fucked up at this point it's beyond repair. but there's definitely no Dr. Hulk, and Steve doesn't go back to live with Peggy because fuck that bullshit

tldr: I don't fucking get rid of character development every time it happens <3333 I let the characters change and grow naturally because I know how to tell a fucking story

[letteredlettered]

Hello!! If you haven't replied already, could you talk about the "Captain Rogers Goes To Washington 6"? 💕 And if you've already done that one, can you talk about "zombie au"? Thank you ✨

Hello, thank you for asking!!!

Captain Rogers Goes To Washington 6 was my next installment in the Responsible Science series, which is an MCU series focused on Bruce Banner, and one of my favorite things I've ever written. I know, I know, I wrote the majority of that series in 2012; the last installment was finished in February 2013--how could I still be working on it? Well, believe me when I say that I still poke at a fic I started in 2007, and that I still return sometimes to the first fanfic I ever wrote, which I started in fourth grade.

This fic had several things going on: I wanted Bruce to get a serum that would block the Hulk; he would use this in a fic later in the series, and it would go terribly wrong (it actually separates Bruce and the Hulk into two different bodies, which Bruce thinks is great because he doesn't have the Hulk living inside him any more. He doesn't really care that much what the Hulk is up to, because as it turns out, the Hulk is deeply connected to Bruce's emotions, so without the Hulk Bruce basically becomes this cold, emotionless scientist without any social responsibility or compassion. When the Avengers fix the problem by reuniting Bruce and the Hulk, Bruce is horrified--he finds himself without the Hulk even more of a monster than with the Hulk--poor Bruce).

My idea for Bruce to get this serum is that someone would experiment on him; the obvious choice was that he would get captured once again by General Ross. This was great, because the other thing I wanted to deal with in the story was Bruce's relationship with Betty Ross; she's not very fleshed out in the movies, but I really wanted to explore her as a character and Bruce's history with her. This WIP kept getting combined and separated with a backstory I was writing for Bruce that dealt with his relationship with Betty before the Hulk and after.

If I remember correctly, Betty canonically lives in Virginia, so I had to give Bruce a reason to go there. I had him kind of thinking about it and that it was a part of his past he should face, but Bruce doesn't take a lot of initiative, shall we say, so he needed another kick in the pants. That kick in the pants is Steve Rogers, who is just . . . sad. He's just sad all the time in his brave "I'm okay, really" way, and Bruce doesn't like it and wants the world to be a better place for this man who tries so hard. So Bruce suggests a little field trip to DC so they can see all the museums and monuments (he imagines Steve is a Smithsonian man. Steve likes museums all right, but is more interested in Bruce's interest in them than the museums themselves, really, but Bruce is convinced that Steve must love them).

I think part of the inspiration was that I went to DC while writing the third part of this series--@mydaroga and I went to con.txt. together and then DC. That was my first time, and I kept thinking what Steve would think of everything. Consequently, the parts of this fic I have written are Bruce and Steve looking at monuments, despising American history and considering the potential of the experiment that is America, and being sad about politics. It's kind of too full of itself and thinks itself too important, but I do love me some Steve being sad.

Then they were going to part ways so Bruce could see Betty and Steve could go to Arlington; this series was started before Winter Soldier, so he still thinks Bucky is dead. Then after seeing Betty, Bruce was going to get nabbed by Ross and given the serum, and while Bruce is blissed out at the thought that he might be able to die (since the serum removes the Hulk), Steve finds out and fights a tank single-handedly to save Bruce, and Bruce is very, very disappointed. Steve is disappointed in Bruce for wanting to die, and Bruce is annoyed at Steve for not understanding him; they drive back to NYC in silence, and it's not a very happy fic.

[soul-dwelling]

I dunno, its funny to me, I hate the SE manga ending, but atleast it had the guts to basically end the institution of "death scythes" and even the endless war between witches and the dwma - I mean it was rushed but still - while BNHA, a series about passing the torch, about the flaws of the old ways, had just minor gradualist reforms?

Maybe I was expecting too much lol

Question received August 3, 2024, answered August 4, 2024--the official publication date of the last My Hero Academia chapter. 

I think this has as much to do with real-world applications. It’s similar to the problem of whether you want gradual change in society or immediate change. Personally I get why some change is gradual for the sake of trial and error to see what works; I also think the United States needs a drastic leftward swing to counteract more than 40 years of rightwing regression, and that requires immediate fixes, not gradual changes to policing, social welfare, financial support and debt cancellation, federalization of industries and services, stronger support for labor unions, demilitarization, de-policing, shifting resources and services from police departments to non-police units, and drastic reforms to economics and industry to protect laborers and the environment. 

This is a work of fiction. I’m surprised Horikoshi insisted on grounding this in some sort of hyper-realism rather than just letting a happy ending exist. It’s the same problem I have had with the MCU ever since the first Iron Man: the insistence on “grounded in realism” means no magic, little sci-fi, no aliens--and then, boom, suddenly all this unrealistic stuff that clashes and leads to power scaling that is not believable and does not dig into how characters would act in a believable fashion. Horikoshi puts these characters into this setting--and their actions do not strike me as believable for what they would do. 

And I do not feel equipped right now to discuss how some of the changes we do see to society are handled. Shoji helped educate against bigotry--why won’t you show us how? Ochaco implemented better counseling in schools to help students with dangerous Quirks--why don’t you show us how? I am so tired of stories that skip past the bureaucratic community organizing--show me those steps. I know Parks and Recreation has its problems, but it was able to make stories out of the process of providing governmental services. I want to see process, even in my action-packed superhero story. 

But I reluctantly agree: at least Soul Eater showed a very obvious change to their society first with the pact with the witches and second with the elimination of any future Death Scythes, making sure to not just tell but show in the form of Kid’s humbling of himself to Mabaa, the witches showing up to save the DWMA members on the Moon, and Soul’s ceremony at the DWMA as the last death scythe. Where were the scenes in Chapter 430 showing Ochaco leading Quirk counseling? Give me another scene of Shoji engaging in anti-bigotry work outside of shaking hands with another mutant-type person. 

[iamconstantine]

[let-me-luve-you]

Separated Cherries

Tom Holland x Sister

Summary: The reader deals with anxiety and one form of the readers anxiety is separation anxiety. She really misses Tom so he flies her to Cleveland while he’s working on Cherry. He later admits how hard it was for him to worry about her and focus on the seriousness of the character.

Warnings: anxiety, separation anxiety, angst, protective Tom, talks of Cherry (nothing is mentioned specific i don’t think, but I do mention that it was hard for Tom to film it and how it deals with difficult topics)

A/N: I’m awful. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry for the late post but I hope you enjoy it!! This was for a special person and I hope they enjoy it! Also I mention a scene in Cherry but don’t go into detail but if you have watched the press tour, you may know what scene I’m talking about. Or if you’ve seen the movie, you may know what scene I’m talking about. I tried to avoid spoilers so I hope you like this story.

MASTERLIST      BUY ME A COFFEE

The days leading up to Tom leaving, you didn’t leave his side. He didn’t mind though. He loved having you around. You grounded him and reminded of the normal life he left behind when he went to be The Tom Holland the world knows and loves.

Earlier this month, Tom took you with him to Utah for a convention. You had never gone to one before so Tom thought this would be a good time. Tom also was being a little selfish and wanted you there with him since he was still dealing with the news of Spider-Man leaving the MCU.

Now he’s about to leave for Cleveland to film Cherry. A movie Tom knew was going to be a challenge for him. The Russo’s fought for him to be in this movie. They wanted Tom in this role more than anybody. They even got a job for Harry. You had asked Tom, when he first learned of the filming dates, if you could go with him. Since Tom knew the contents of the movie and how dark it was, he didn’t want you around that, so he said no.

Now, it’s the night before he’s leaving. You are curled up on his bed watching him pack his bag. “Don’t forget your blue light glasses.” You said.

“Already have them packed in my carry-on with my laptop and chargers.” He said to you with a smile. “Thank you though. I do forget them all the time.” You laughed.

You turned serious, “I’m going to miss you. I know you said I couldn’t go, but I still wish I could go with you.” Tom sighed.

“I know. I’m going to miss you too, but this film is just going to be dealing with a lot of serious issues and I don’t want you to have to see me like that.” He said, honestly.

“I know. Can I still call you though?” You asked sheepishly.

“Always.” He said before turning to his dresser to get socks and underwear. “So, what are your plans for the next few months?”

“I plan on helping mum. She apparently has a lot of shoots. Probably taste test all of Sam’s food.” You laughed.

“I’m so jealous. I have yet to find something I don’t like of Sam’s.” Tom said.

“He is a great cook.” Tom agreed. “Paddy apparently has a show he’s going to be on, so I’ll help him with that in any way I can. And Dad is working on a new book, so whatever he needs me to do, I’ll do.”

“You really are great, you know that?” Tom asked as he paused his packing to come sit next to you. He wrapped you in a hug. “Are you going to do anything for you?” You shrugged. “Do me a favor? Do something for you. Learn to do more for you. You help all of those around you, but you rarely do things for you. Draw more or hide away and read. Go out to a party or go do something with your friends. Remember to take care of you. Promise me, you’ll try to do that.”

“Promise.” You said. He squeezed you tighter in the hug and gave you a kiss on your head before getting up to finish his packing.

The rest of the night was uneventful. Tom finished packing and put his bags by the front door. You both got comfy on his bed and watched a movie. You were the first to fall asleep and first to wake up the next day. Tom’s and Harry’s flight wasn’t until 10 am and it was currently 630. You decided to make them a good breakfast so they would be fine until the flight gave out their lunch.

“What are you doing?” You heard a tired voice. You looked over your shoulder to see Tom walking up to sit at the counter. You smiled at him and fixed him a cup of tea.

“I’m making you and Harry breakfast.” You said cheerfully. You walked back over to the stove and finished making the eggwhite omelet. Tom was on a strict diet so you made something he could eat, but also something that he liked. You put it on a plate and set it in front of him.

“You didn’t have to do this.” Tom said. “But thank you. This looks delicious.” “What looks delicious?” Harry asked as he sat next to Tom. “Oooh. I want one.”

“It’s coming right up.” You said as you set a tea in front of him and turned back to making his omelette.

“Thank you Y/N.” Harry said, taking a sip of his freshly made tea. “Can I hire you to be my personal assistant?” You all laughed. “When we get home, I’ll treat you to dinner via Sam’s cooking.”

“Sounds good to me. I’m holding you to it.” You said. “I’m really going to miss you guys.”

“Just a few months and then we will be home for Christmas.” Tom said standing up to put his plate in the sink.

“I know. Still sucks. I hate when you leave.” You opened up. You had been holding it in. You felt bad for dropping it on him right before he leaves, but it needed to be said. “It always just feels different around here. I don’t know how to describe it, but it doesn’t feel like we are complete.”

“I know it’s not ideal to have two brothers that are constantly traveling for work. That we aren’t here for family dinners, but we are a phone call or text away. Reach out and we will try to answer as quickly as possible.” Tom said looking into your eyes. You could see that he meant them.”

“Ignore me. I’m just in my feels this morning. I’ll be okay.” You whispered. You wrapped Tom in a hug. “I’m proud of you, you know? It’s so great to see you out there doing what you love and seeing the people’s lives that you touch.”

“Thank you y/n/n. I love you.” Tom said kissing your forehead.

“Love you too.” You squeezed him tighter before pulling away and wrapping Harry in a hug. “Love you too Hairball.”

Harry scoffed at the nickname you gave him when you were both extremely young and you were mad at him. “Don’t call me that…” He paused before hugging you back. “Love you too.”

“Now you better get going before you’re late.” You said. “I also packed you small snack bags and put them in your carry ons.”

“You’re the best.” Tom said as he walked to put his shoes on. “Thank you y/n/n.” Harry said doing the same.

You watched them grab their bags and walk out of the house with one last smile. You sighed and went back to your room to take a nap. Already missing your brothers, you decided to turn on Spider-Man Homecoming.

It is now mid-October and you were missing Tom and Harry more than anything. You tried to hangout with Sam and Paddy more to try to not feel the sadness of missing your other two brothers. Paddy didn’t want to hangout with you. He was too busy hanging out with his friends and playing football. Sam was always at the restaurant or in the kitchen at your parents house. You would stay with him and watch him cook, but it wasn’t the same.

Your sleep schedule was messed up due to the fact you were staying up late watching Netflix. Looking over at the clock, it read 3 am. Pulling your phone from your bedside table, you pulled up Tom’s contact and decided to FaceTime him. It only rang for a couple of seconds before he answered.

“Is everything okay?” Tom asked worriedly. You could tell he was laying in bed.

“Yeah. I just wanted to talk to you.” You answered honestly.

“It’s 3 am where you are! Why are you not asleep?” His eyes widened as he realized how late it was for you.

“I can’t. My schedules messed up. I’m fine. Did I wake you?” You asked, scared of the answer.

“No. I was just watching some TV before I went to bed. I have a 7am call time.” He said and you breathed a sigh of relief for not waking him.

“How was filming today?” You said looking at his tired eyes.

“It was good. We did a hard scene today, but it went really well. We have another hard, long day again tomorrow.” Tom rubbed the tired out of his eyes. He was just about to fall asleep when called.

“I’m sorry you’ve had some hard days.” You said sincerely.

“Thanks but it’s okay. Thankfully Harry’s here. He’s really helping me.” Tom sighed.

“I’d help you if I was there. I know it’s hard, but I’m proud of you.” You said with your eyes tearing up.

“Are you doing okay?” Tom asked concern noticing the change of tone in your voice. “Mum said you’ve been at the house a lot.”

“I’m doing okay. I went and got my nails done today with Chandra.” You said showing Tom the Marvel based nails. With Tom only being a year older than you, he got you into Marvel when you were younger. Spider-Man was always your favorite and when Tom got the role, you celebrated just as much or even more than he did.

“I like them. They’re pretty.” Tom said with a small smile. “How are you holding up though with me and Harry being gone? I haven’t asked in a while.”

You sighed and looked away from Tom. You didn’t want him to know how much you missed him, but you missed your best friend. “I’m good. Been hanging out with friends more and I help Sam when he’s at home. Mum, Dad, and I have had movie nights. It’s been good.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked, still concerned. You felt a tear you had been fighting fall down your cheek. You looked away from the phone. “Y/N/N. Look at me.”

Shaking your head, “I’m fine Tom. I just miss my best friend.”

“I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could do.” He said.

“I’ll be okay.” You whispered.

“How about this…” Tom said. “Let me fly you out to visit. We are about to do some of the easier stuff and you can come stay with us while the scenes aren’t so intense.”

“You don’t have to do that. I’m just being weird.” You said not wanting for him to be pressured into inviting you.

“Separation anxiety isn’t you being weird. It’s an actual thing.” He said sincerely. He cared about you. You didn’t know you had this issue until Tom got the role of Spider-Man and left for Atlanta. Your mum noticed you clingy to them more or your other brothers. When Tom arrived home you stuck to him like glue. Your mum decided to take you to a doctor to see if there was anything to do for you. You learned the anxiety medicine didn’t help you and talking to a therapist only went so far. All you wanted, was to be with your whole family.

“I’ll get Harry to schedule you a flight. Pack warm clothes and at least two weeks worth.” He said.

“No, Tom, it’s okay. I’ll be okay.” You fought back.

“I’m serious. Come stay with us. Harry will get your flight.” He kept fighting back.

“If you're sure.” You said softly. Tom almost didn’t hear it.

“I’m sure. I miss you too. Plus having you here may help me.” Tom said, laying back down on his pillow. You could tell he was tired, but he was staying awake for you.

“I appreciate it, T.” You spoke honestly. “I really do miss you. I love you.”

“Love you too y/n/n.” He whispered while fighting to keep his eyes open.

“Get some sleep. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Night.” Tom said before hanging up. You smiled knowing you were finally going to get to see your brother again very soon. You laid back on your bed and finally felt the exhaustion from staying up late. You could worry about what you were going to pack tomorrow.

When Tom told Harry to schedule you a flight out, Harry accidentally scheduled it too early. Tom still had some hard scenes to film. When you landed in America, he didn’t want you to come to set, but he didn’t want to leave you at home either.

Harry showed you where you could go and couldn’t. You basically only went to Tom’s trailer, the bathroom, the food tent, and Tom’s chair. Today, Tom begged you not to come because he knew the day was full of hard things. He knew what the last scene was going to be filmed and he didn’t want you to see that.

You insisted you could handle it. You didn’t want to be alone. You wanted to spend time with your brother. Tom finally gave in after you promised you would stay in his trailer during that final scene.

Throughout the day, you stayed close to Tom. When he wasn’t filming or on set, you were right beside him. He tried to be understanding of how you were feeling, but he really needed to step away from everything he’s been feeling for filming.

“How’s your sandwich?” Tom asked at dinner. It had been a long day and there was only one more thing to film before there were four days off.

“It’s good. How’s your salad?” You asked, pointing at his plate.

“It’s good.” He said nonchalantly. You knew he was craving more food. You had asked Harry to go get him a cheeseburger with fries. You looked up and noticed him carrying a bag from Five Guys.

You smiled and Tom looked over his shoulder. “Thanks for going to get that Harry.” You said as Harry sat next to you. You grabbed the bag and pulled out the burger and fries. “Eat up Tom. I know you’re hungry for more.”

“I can’t you guys.” Tom said in a defeated tone. “I’m still on this diet. I can’t. I can’t do that to everyone that’s working on this film.”

You sighed, “Tom, you have had salads everyday for two weeks. You can have one burger. You need more food.” Tom looked at you and then looked at Harry.

“I mean, I did go get it and I agree with Y/N. You do need to eat more and it will be okay. One cheeseburger won’t hurt.” Harry said. Finally Tom agreed to eating the food Harry brought. “Y/n/n are you going to set tonight?”

“No. I promised Tom I wouldn’t be there.” You answered honestly. Harry looked over at Tom shocked. Harry figured Tom would want you there since it’s such a hard scene. Maybe have someone other than him that’s familiar.

“You can come work with me.” Harry told you.

Tom looked up at him shocked. “I don’t want her to see this. It’ll be hard enough to have her watching it in the movie.”

“I think it’ll be good for her to be there. It’s a hard scene and I won’t be able to be there between takes.” Harry said. Harry was doing a new role tonight and needed to focus on that.

“It’s okay Harry. I can wait in the trailer. I brought my book.” You said with a smile. Trying to help Tom out so he doesn’t feel like he’s being teamed up on. Tom smiled at you gratefully. Harry turned to Tom and started to whisper something to him. You watched Tom’s demeanor change. He rolled his eyes before turning back to you.

“You can come. Bring your book and a blanket. You can sit in my chair.” Tom said finally giving into Harry.

“It’s okay. I don’t mind waiting in the trailer. Promise.” You told Tom. Tom finished eating his food before standing up to go to his trailer with you and Harry following. He walked in and grabbed your book off of the counter and grabbed your blanket. “Let’s go.” Tom said as he walked out the door towards the set.

“Tom. I’m not going.” You said. Harry shook his head and started to push you towards set. “I promised I wouldn’t go.”

“Come on y/n/n. I promise it’s okay. I don’t count this as a broken promise. I want you there.” Tom said with a sigh. You decided not to keep fighting with him about it. You ran to catch up with him and grabbed the blanket and book from him. “Thank you.” He whispered. “This is going to be a difficult scene to watch, so I’m sorry for what you have to see.”

“It’s okay Tom. I’m a big girl. I can handle it.” You said with a small smile.

Later that night, Tom was in the makeup trailer getting his makeup removed. You were sitting in his trailer with Harry waiting to go home. You tried to hold in your tears. You hated seeing Tom like that.

“Are you okay?” Harry asked.

“Great.” You said forcing a smile.

Harry looked at you skeptically and then nodded. He pulled out his phone and sent the video he got to Tom. You were exhausted and just wanted to go to sleep. You decided to lay down and rest your eyes until Tom got back. You were just about to fall into a deep sleep when you heard Tom walk in.

“Should I send this to mum?” Tom asked with a laugh.

“Do it.” Harry laughed. “But first, let’s go home. I think someone needs a bed.”

Tom looked over at your sleeping body. He smiled at you. Harry was right. Having you there helped him. This was probably the hardest scene he was going to have to film in the whole movie.

“Go get the car. I’ll bring her out.” Tom said as he started putting your stuff in your backpack. He quickly put his and your backpacks over his shoulder before he moved over towards you. He picked you up bridal style and made sure the blanket didn’t fall off. “Shhh. It’s just me. We’re going home.” He said when you started to wake.

Pulling up to the house, Tom decided to shake you awake this time. You woke and looked around confused before you unbuckled and walked into the house. You crashed on the couch and watched Tom set your backpack in the chair.

“How are you doing? Today was hard.” You said.

Tom picked your feet up and sat down before he placed your feet in his lap. He laid his head back. “Today sucked. I’m not going to be able to sleep tonight.” Tom said with a sigh.

“Want to talk about it?” You asked.

“No. There isn’t much to talk about. I just need to get out of that mental mindset.” Tom said honestly. “How are you? That had to be hard to watch.”

You finally let a tear slip. “I’m okay. I just didn’t like seeing you like that.”

“I’m sorry. You weren’t supposed to see the hard parts.” He said, pulling you into a hug.

“It’s okay. I promise. It’s scary to think people actually go through that. I don’t want to see you or anyone go through this.” You whispered.

“Hopefully this movie brings light to these situations and starts a conversation.” Tom said, giving you a kiss on the head before releasing you. “Now no more talks of this. Let’s try to forget about today and watch a movie instead.”

Tom started up a comedy to try and bring the mood up. Harry joined you after changing into his pajamas. Mid way through the movie, you fell asleep. Tom looked over at you. He knew you being here helped you, but in his head he was worried about you and everything you were seeing. It was hard to focus on you and filming.

It’s now been a year since Tom finished filming Cherry. Tom invited you to come with him to film Spider-Man No Way Home. He went three months without seeing you after the pandemic due to his heavy film schedule for Uncharted. He knew those were hard days for you since you went from spending all day with him to not even seeing him.

Now Tom was doing press for Cherry since it is due to come out in a few weeks. He set up in the living room. Harry had got a ring light to make the videos look better. You were supposed to be out while Tom was doing his few interviews for the day, but you got back early. He still had one more to go. You decided to sit in your room so you wouldn’t interrupt.

Even with your door closed, you could hear Tom talking to the interviewer. What you heard made your heart stop.

“Tom, your brother and sister were with you when filming Cherry, right?” they asked.

“They were. Harry helped on the film. Even had a small role. And my sister, Y/N, came out to visit and stayed the rest of filming.” Tom answered.

“Did having them there help you?”

“It did. This was a role I had to go to a dark place. Having them there really helped ground me and bring me back from that dark place. They definitely had my back during these times. I was actually on a strict diet throughout filming. Y/N actually made Harry go get me a cheeseburger on her first night there because she knew that I needed a little more substance. I had two weeks worth of salads and she knew I needed a little more. On nights of hard filming, we would all sit in the living room and watch a comedy because it all took us a while to calm down from the day. So having them there was very important to me.”

“That's amazing to hear.” they said. “It’s always good to have family there for you. You said there were hard filming nights. Even though it was hard, which was your favorite?”

“There was one scene that was extremely hard to film. The entire day was hard. Sadly, it was my sister’s first day there. I didn’t want her to see those scenes, but it was good to have her there. The day was a couple of scenes that dealt with something with Emily. The whole day was based on that situation. It was a variety of emotions. I had to be scared, angry, sad.” Tom said. “I actually sent my mum a video from that and she was not happy. She called me immediately to tell me she didn’t appreciate it.” He laughed.

“Can you give us a hint of what that was?” they asked.

“I don’t want to give too much away, but it’s when I’m in the truck. You’ll know when you see it because it involves Emily and it’s very hard to watch.” Tom said.

“You say it’s hard to watch and that was your sister’s first day, how did she handle it? And how did Harry handle it?” you heard them ask. They were starting to dig deeper.

“Harry was the one that filmed that scene so I could send it to my mum.” Tom laughed. He knew Nikki would give him heck for it later, but he knew it was only because she cared. “My sister actually hated watching that scene. She’ll hate me for saying this, but she cried. It scared her because she said it felt real and she didn’t want to see anyone like that.”

“That makes sense. Both of you are close in age, how are the two of yours relationship? It has to be good for you to allow her to visit during such a hard movie.”

“We are very close. She’s my best friend. I can say this because she openly talks about it and helps raise money for charities, but she has anxiety and one thing that really affects her is her separation anxiety. It was great to have her on set because she brought me back to myself, helped me get out of that dark mindset. But at times, I felt I was more worried about her and making sure she was okay. Mixing the stress of taking care of her and the stress of playing the role was hard to take on.”

You listened and felt tears build up. You made Tom’s job harder. You felt a tear fall down your face and you held back a sob so Tom couldn’t hear. You immediately went to the closest and grabbed your suitcase. You started packing your clothes. Once you were finished you set it near the door and grabbed your laptop so you could find a plane ticket. Tom walked in as you were searching.

“Why is your suitcase out?” He asked, confused.

“I’m going home.” You said shortly.

“Why?” He questioned.

“I’m just a burden to you. I don’t want you to have to worry about me while you focus on filming. I just like being in the same city as you. I didn’t mean to add stress to you.” You said as a tear slipped.

Tom sighed, “You heard?” He asked. You nodded. “Did you hear everything?”

“I didn’t need to. I heard enough.” You said honestly.

“So you didn’t hear what I said after that?” He asked. You shook your head. “I told them that it was worth it. That I would go through 20 times the stress if it meant you were happy and safe. That your anxiety wasn’t holding you back. That I used some of the stress from caring about you to help with the film. You remember the emotional scene in Morocco.” You once again shook your head. “I used the stress to make that scene. I know that sounds bad, but I think that really helped me hit the emotion I needed.”

“That was a beautiful scene. From what I saw, it’s one of my favorites for you. It’s heartbreaking, but you made the viewers feel what you were feeling. That was because of me?” Tom nodded his head.

“I’m sorry for admitting to it, but just know, if we redid all of the filming, I would have you there from day 1. I love having you around. I have all this noise around me that is trying to change me and having you here helps keep me the kid from Kingston.” Tom said. “Please don’t leave. I really do want you here.”

You looked around at your room. You then focused on your suitcase. You thought about it. “I’ll stay.” Tom smiled when you looked at him. “Only if you promise me something.”

“Anything.” He agreed.

“If I am stressing you out, in the way, or affecting your work, you tell me. I’ll stay here for a few days or I’ll go home. I don’t want to burden you with my problems.”

“Your anxiety isn't a problem. It’s something you battle and I want to help you fight.” Tom interfered.

“I know. And you will. But if it affects you, it isn’t fighting, it’s a problem. So please promise me that you’ll tell me.” You begged.

“I promise. But know you are never a burden to me. You are my best friend and I love you. I want you here. Trust me on that.” Tom said as he pulled you into a hug. “Now, are you ready to go to dinner? We have an early day on set tomorrow.”

You nodded. You knew that your anxiety was a battle but you didn’t want to bother Tom. You knew he was telling the truth when he said you weren’t a burden. You knew the thought would come back, but you had to tell yourself that it was your anxiety. Now working on your separation anxiety would be worked on at a later date.

[valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn]

I'm seeing certain takes on Stephen's character lately that I disagree with wholeheartedly so I gotta say something (Spider-Man: No Way Home spoilers ahead)

1. The spell. As shown towards the end of the movie, if Stephen isn't distracted it can work easily and without any trouble. I admit he probably should have explained things to Peter a little better before starting because it's clear he didn't know the full extent of the spell and that's on Stephen for not telling him. But it went wrong because Peter kept interrupting him even after being told twice not to disrupt the spell.

2. The multiverse. Unless told otherwise in MoM, Stephen did not cause the chaos in the multiverse. He cast a spell, Peter messed it up, Stephen contained it, Osborn destroyed the box then Stephen had to cast a new spell to shut down the openings and send everyone home. For now the only character we know for sure has caused the chaos is Sylvie, even Wanda's involvement is somewhat dubious.

3. Wong. The scene in the trailer where he's telling Stephen not to cast the spell is NOT in the movie. What happens in the movie is Stephen telling Wong there's a spell that could help Peter, asking him for permission then Wong granting it. Stephen never cast the spell behind Wong's back, he did it with his permission. When the spell went wrong he did hid the outcome to Wong and promised to fix things before he returned though but that's not the same as what we see in the trailer (this is a whole other post but I hate Marvel for lying in trailers. Not giving away critical info is one thing but downright lying? Not cool).

4. Stephen wanted the villains to die (he didn't, it's not that simple). You can't judge his actions and ignore the context and his past. This is a Stephen that had to make a decision out of 14 million different outcomes on which future to choose, knowing full well the whole universe would suffer greatly for 5 years, knowing some people would die and by choosing that future he was leading Stark and Natasha to their deaths and he still feels remorse and guilt. When he's telling Peter that the villains' 'fate' is to die he's thinking of the bigger picture in direct contrast to what Peter cares about (his life, his friends). Their views are completely opposite at that moment and despite Peter's noble quest not working at first it does end well, at which point Stephen backs off. But what if it hadn't worked out? They're lucky that after the fight in Happy's place only May died and not more people, but if they had caused many deaths then whose responsibility is that?

5. Stephen is as arrogant as he used to be in the hospital (no, he isn't). You know that part after Peter has ruined the spell when Stephen is angry, raising his voice at him? He stops himself, says sometimes he forgets Peter is just a kid, and apologizes to him. You seriously think if he was still the same guy from the hospital he would have done that? Nope. Stephen has changed a lot since those days, he's more empathetic and compassionate, but his line of work doesn't allow him to think about his selfish wants and needs, he has a world and universe to protect, which is exactly what he was doing in this movie.

6. Stephen was wrong to think the villains couldn't change. Well, they didn't change did they? They had that change forced upon them against their will. That's hardly a redemption arc. And don't forget that the audience may know these characters but in-universe neither Peter nor Stephen know anything about them or how they ended up that way.

Overall, as a long time (MCU) Stephen fan my opinion is that he was entirely in character for the entire movie and I was left pretty satisfied with his story arc. I can only hope MoM continues this although I have my concerns (and just one last thing, please stop saying What If!Stephen is evil. He isn't. He made a huge mistake, went a little crazy and ruined his universe but he had a redemption arc in the series. Give him a break, poor thing).

[samwilson-saves-lives]

The One Downfall of TFATWS

Something I think @svmbucky  illustrates beautifully throughout their blog is the way that TFATWS focuses mainly on Bucky's trauma and very little on Sam's trauma. Not to say that Bucky's trauma and healing isn't as valid or isn't as much of a priority but Sam's mental health and overall well-being is also a priority; Bucky isn't the only main character with trauma in TFATWS. Sam faces racial profiling, his experiences as a black man are devalued, he was left behind by Steve, someone he dedicated a portion of his life to, he watches a CHILD die in his arms, and he DISAPPEARED FOR FIVE YEARS there's a lot for Sam to unpack and heal from in FATWS but he doesn't. Sam instead spends his time trying to fix everything and everyone: the boat, his family's finances, Bucky, Karli, global relations, Captain America's image, etc. I think the way that Sam supports other people throughout his time in the MCU is great but Sam also deserves that same amount of support and respect in return not just a simple “you okay?” while in the presence of a mission obsessed war criminal who’s just escaped from prison. I know that for some people, and even occasionally my self, it’s easier to help other people with their lives and take on their issues rather than deal with your own and it can be freeing to distance yourself from your own things, but that doesn’t make it healthy. Yes, Sam is helping others and supporting others, but is he doing from a place of being healthy himself and wanting to encourage others to be in healthy place or is he doing it because it’s easier than working through his own trauma and expressing his own grievances? 

I don’t want to compare Sam and Bucky’s trauma in any way, shape, or form because they are very different people with very different experiences but that doesn’t excuse the fact that Sam isn’t allowed have his moments of emotional outburst even while being berated and sometimes even belittled by Bucky (in FATWS, the couples therapy scene) because he chose not to become Captain America after being handed the shield by a man who never considered Sam’s feelings about representing and fighting for a country that has never represented him or his people. 

FATWS does a great job of showing Bucky’s evolution to trusting Sam but, in my opinion, doesn’t allow Sam to really deal with a lot of his trauma in the show to CA:TWS, CA:CW, A:IW, and A:EG. Sam very likely has PTSD and/or anxiety from legit fighting 3 WARS and there is no way in hell anyone can walk away from that and be happy as pie without taking any of it home with them.

 In conclusion, 1) let people of color not be okay sometimes without it becoming toxic for other characters; 2) people of color aren’t fragile but we still need support; 3) characters of color shouldn’t only exist to further the story of the white main character or support the white main character; and most importantly 4) BETTER FOR SAM WILSON!!!

[ladykf-writes]

Challenge: list the WIPs you promised you’d update, and why you haven’t yet

Tagged by @yuzukimist - if you want to do this, please repost and tag me, don’t reblog, because this will be a bit long. I have, uh... a lot of WIPs to address.

A few suggested tags: @vorpalgirl , @wandererriha, @thegeeksqueaks , @lynati , @deadcatwithaflamethrower​ and @norcumii​ if you all would like to? And YOU, you person who’s reading this!

NOW! Being fair the only one I’ve “promised” updates on is Dog Whistle, and I just updated that Saturday, but there was such a hiatus in-between that I’ll address it.

The fact of the matter is, I got stuck on DW because I wanted to do Shelke justice but she’s a very different fighter than the other Tsviets/SOLDIER (and therefore out of my usual experiences as a writer). A traditional fight scene... isn’t going to be what she’s angling for. She is a Brain, the fact that she was out where someone could attack her head on... that was a miscalculation on their part. She would he have been so much better left to manage things behind the scenes. Alas.

But yeah, a lot of these are either “plot got stuck on a problem” or “character in the story was not cooperating” as you’ll see shortly. XD

Cause of delay on DW: 

- differently paced fight scene / figuring out how to get in Shelke’s head. (shoutout to @wandererriha for getting me unstuck with some great ideas!)

I’ve also had a couple people ask about It’s Not a Game (the FF7/Avengers crossover that I haven’t posted on since early ‘19 whups?) And actually, it’s... sort of tricky what happened.

See, I had finished the next chapter, but it’s short. It’s like, nearly 300 words short of my self-imposed minimum count (I aim for between 1500-2500 words on my chapters because in my experience most people can read that in one sitting and at the same time feel like they’ve read a good chunk / me actually advance the plot / character arcs / etc.)

And I got hung up on that. I couldn’t seem to make it organically longer, and it frustrated me, and it wasn’t like I had a plot for this - spoilers: this was meant to be a thought provoking one-shot what-if, not the multichaptered fix it that it’s turning into - so I didn’t want to jump ahead without really knowing where “ahead” was supposed to be.

I have since then accepted that the chapter’s going to just be short and I have some ideas on where I’m going from there. I do, in fact, have a few chapters written now (like, 2.5 I think? maybe 3? I don’t have it open right now) but I want to try and wind up DW before I start working hard core on something as plotty as INAG is threatening to become. To top it off, Age of Ultron (2015) had started my decline in enthusiasm for Marvel (I really only watched the Iron Man and Avengers movies; Guardians of the Galaxy and Ragnarok were exceptions) and in 2019 what happened? Endgame, and a severe blow to my love of the MCU.

Cause of delay on INAG:

- pacing issues + lack of plotting + falling a little out of love with the MCU canon and therefore losing my grip on Tony and Bruce, which makes it harder to write the story.

Some honorable mentions under the cut since this is too long already:

Another WIP is Party of Five, which no one has asked about in a long time but does get a mention because... basically I’ve got at least two chapters edited but I need to make some changes to fix things and... really? The big thing is I fell out of doing MMOs, so I lost enthusiasm for writing about MMOs. XD There’s an unposted, halfformed Sanders Sides MMO AU I’ve even got that never saw the light of day for the same reason.

That said, I’m planning on starting some serious gaming soon, if all goes according to plan, so you might just see me revisiting that!

Cause of delay on Po5:

- quit playing MMOs and lost enthusiasm for a MMO heavy fic

Then of course there’s the Welcome to FFVII series and that one’s been even longer stagnating... and the biggest thing getting in my way is saying “how much am I willing to stick to a canon that doesn’t make sense” + “how do I make it make sense / justify things” and I think anyone in the FFVII fandom can relate. We love it dearly, but it is a hot mess. It’s been a hot mess since day one, and just gets messier the deeper into the Compilation you go.

I’m not even touching the Remake, and doubt playing it would make me change my mind.

Cause of delay on WTFFVII:

- canon is a hot mess and it’s really hard to make it make sense. Brain-bendingly hard. It requires a lot of thinking and tbh I think I’m just going to overhaul the whole thing into something new.

My last two (posted) WIPs are not, in fact, FF7 fics so you guys may or may not have read them.

I have a ton written on Dewprism: Journey to the [Relic] - my seminovelization of the old PS1 game that approximately 5 people remember, because I did it for a NaNo. Frankly, I think it has some of the highest quality prose out of anything I’ve ever written.

It also has no comments. And very simply? I write for myself - I wrote over 50K on this baby for me, because I love it - but I post to share the love. It hasn’t gotten attention, so it’s on the back burner. Why spend time on something no one’s reading?

Cause of delay on JTTR:

- zero feedback on 12 chapters killed my enthusiasm for the project. I’ll come back to it someday, but it’s not a priority.

And finally, Times of Change, which does actually get periodic traffic - I would say probably only because it’s listed as “inspired by” a fic from the fantastic @deadcatwithaflamethrower but who knows.

This one suffered from the same problem Po5 did - it’s a crossover with SWTOR... which I quit playing. It also has the problem that INAG did, in that it’s not fully plotted. And additionally it’s been so long since I’ve read the fic it’s based off of I’d have to go back and do that too. So while it’s not abandoned... it’s way down the list. XD

Cause of delay on ToC:

- lost touch with Star Wars in general, honestly, and specifically the two (fan)canons it was born from to begin with. Lack of enthusiasm = lack of progress.

[princesssarcastia]

2021 Harry Potter Fanfic Primer

im here to point fingers at the incredible authors that have enabled my new interest in HP content.  im still conflicted and upset about it, tbh, but for now we’re leaning into the curve.  we’re getting out our shovel and finding out just how deep we can make the hole we’re in.  hand in unlovable hand my beloved <3.  anyway, these fics are wonderful, their authors are wonderful, and you should go read their stuff. if there’s a star next to it that means im losing my mind over it and always will be.

Creatively Maladjusted, by elumish on AO3, 101k  (they also have a wonderful writing advice blog on tumblr, @elumish, which I recommend following if you are a writer) 

A very excellent re-telling of harry’s first year at hogwarts if he were sorted into Slytherin, plus some more not!fic or piecemeal re-tellings of his second and part of his third year.  Harry, in this, has a slightly different trauma response to growing up with the Dursley’s.  He’s a bit quieter, and the signs are a bit more obvious to the people around him, and I enjoyed that immensely. 

Honestly, if you’re going to get sucked into something you have absolutely no business getting sucked into, elumish is the way to go, their fic is incredible. their teen wolf fic is also immaculate, if you’re so inclined. 

Dissonance, by ImpishTubist on AO3, 2.5k (@impishtubist on tumblr)

Set during fifth year.  Oblivious!Harry has always been a delightful trope when well executed, and this is well executed.  Plus, some angst between Remus and Harry over what Umbridge has been doing to him.

I would certainly recommend a lot of ImpishTubist’s other hp work on AO3, like Lacuna.

blow us all away, by rexcorvidae on AO3, 23k (@rexcorvidae on tumblr)

In progress (like, updated last week in progress).  Currently in the beginning of Harry’s first year.  Fem!Harry, Indian!Harry.  Hagrid puts Harry in touch with Remus when she has questions about her parents, and they become reluctant, traumatized, angst-ridden pen pals who keep missing each other’s true intentions like ships in the night.  hot DAMN do I love this fic.  there’s hints of the way the dursley’s treat Harry peaking through in her letters, and I appreciated the attention to “hmm, her experience as a girl of indian descent in britain under the thumb of a bunch of white people who like being Normal may not have been gucci”

Definitely comb through the rest of their HP fic, too, I may or may not have gone feral over it.

Where the Heart is, by silver_fish on AO3, 15k (@kohakhearts on tumblr)

Woof.  This one said, “hey, harry was probably SUPER depressed in the summer after fifth year.  like, clinically.  maybe someone should do something about that.”  Fuck yeah.  Then this one said, “that someone was Snape.”  You all know my opinions on Snape; generally, Bad.  But damn if this fic didn’t wholly convince me by the end of it.  I thought it was a very realistic way for Snape to start seeing Harry as a person all on his own, and not a proxy for Snape’s angst over James and Lily, respectively.  The angst is wonderful, the ending is even more so.

*bernie sanders voice* I am once again asking you to read through the rest of the author’s HP fic.  a lot of them have similar themes; there’s actually a great one with Molly that i’m not reccing here, Wonder.

☆Bindings, Bindings, by Quietlemonhush on AO3, 60k (@quietlemonhush on tumblr)

WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS TO YOU HOW MUCH I ENJOYED/AM ENJOYING THIS.  If I had to pick a single fic and say “you, it’s your fault I’m stuck here,” it would be this one.  Anyway Lily in the afterlife is So Very Angry about how Petunia is treating Harry, and how Sirius is rotting in Azkaban, and how Remus is alone, that she literally brings herself back to life and drags James and Regulus with her.  All three of them are there to chew bubblegum and fix everything that went wrong after they died—and would you look at that, they’re all out of bubblegum!  There’s only Fury left.  That inciting premise is very crack, but every moment after that is very much not crack.  Lily and James love harry more than anything, the way a child should be loved; James and Sirius have the epic friendship of a lifetime; Sirius and Remus have staggering amounts of resolved sexual tension and take turns keeping each other in check; Regulus, though he realized that Voldemort and his family were shit before he died, is still unlearning all his racist bullshit and, also, years of trauma.  Actually, they’re all traumatized, but hey: now they have one another again and not a damn one of them seems inclined to let go anytime soon.  Quietlemonhush went, “hey, HP has a lot of Awful people in it, and a lot of Righteous people in it, and many of them are Very, Very Powerful; also, love is the most powerful force in the universe” and i said “hell yes tell me more right now.”  And then they did!

Quietlemonhush writes Sirius/Remus in a way that makes it sooo much fun to devour, so the rest of their HP fic is most certainly worth a look, if that’s your thing.

Rebuilding, by Colubrina on AO3, 113k (@colubrina on tumblr)

Hermione/Draco (*shrug emojis into the abyss* yeah, yeah, like none of us have ever been there before).  Takes place during Hogwarts 8th year, and while the beginning is, IMO, a little unfair to Ron, it gets much better.  Tells the story of Hermione and Draco clearing the air, learning to like each other, having some hormones over each other, and then falling in love.  Also tells the story of Hermione and Theo Nott becoming friends; the story of how every single 7th and 8th year student is fucked to hell by the war and the Carrows; the story of how they start an emotional support group about it and all become friends; and the story of, what the hell do you do with yourself after that kind of trauma?

I’ve been dipping in and out of Colubrina’s HP since before I was even on tumblr; I actually found them in those dark yesteryears when the only fandom interactions I had were on fanfiction.net.  Of such fame as Green Girl, which is an HP fic staple, and has also written a lot of wackier, crackier, and darker things than that.  If you don’t take yourself too seriously, I highly recommend many of their big HP works, though I imagine it’ll press some people’s buttons.  Colubrina’s work really does take up a corner of my mind whenever I’m in an HP mood, and will take up yours if you let it.

☆ all waiting is long, by shuofthewind on AO3, 149k ( @shu-of-the-wind on tumblr)

This is so well written that I can’t stop thinking about it.  It is occupying my mind when I lie awake at night, you know?  It’s one of those.  Hermione messes with something she probably shouldn’t have in Grimmauld Place, so when Sirius is sent through the Veil in the Department of Mysteries, she gets thrust into an alternate universe...in 1975.  Instead of handwaving it away, shuofthewind actually gets into the mechanics of it in a way that makes sense, to emphasize that hermione is never going home.  ever. The world she finds herself is shifted slightly to the left, quite a bit darker, but in a “the author is treating the idea of a society-wide conflict over blood purity much more seriously than JKR ever did” way, not a sensationalist way.  Now, Hermione has to grapple with all her grief at losing everyone she’s ever loved or known, the moral/ethical/magical implications of sharing what she knows about her future in an alternate world, and, you know, a goddamn war with people who want to murder her for being who she is.  This Hermione is smart, and she’s kind, and she’s powerful, and she’s making real friends.  If you hate JKR’s guts I’d go read this right now, because it delivers in all the ways she failed us.  It’s plotty, its got great world-building, and it pulls back the white curtain on the wizarding world to show you that, like real life, it’s multicultural and full of queer people...and the discrimination that comes with both.

shuofthewind write epics, mainly for the MCU, and I’ve read some of them a looooong time ago, so this fic kinda seemed out of left field for me but im SOOOO GLAD it exists.  If you want MCU fic you can sink your teeth into, go for it, but alas, they do not have any more HP fic (.......yet?)

Speak Now [+] Listen Now, by mrsfrizzle on AO3, 33k altogether

Harry reaches out to Remus for support because Umbridge is getting to him with her literal torture.  Remus, being a former professor, former mandatory reporter, person who loves Harry and has since he was born, and all around good man, tells Harry he has to tell someone, or Remus will.  It’s everything any adult looking back on that time in HP canon ever wanted, which is for an actual adult to say “what the fuck, those are literal chidlren” and then do something about it.  Then, a far more dangerous task: Harry trusts Remus enough to go to him about the Dursleys.  Harry and Remus’ relationship develops SO WELL, and there’s a bit of exploration about how Sirius may not exactly be guardian material, because he did in fact spend 12 years of his life getting tortured instead of growing up.  I think I’m actually going to go reread this right now, because it speaks to my id.

they do have some other HP fic which did not appeal to my hyperspecific wants, but may appeal to some of yours.  I think they’re also a published author, there should be a link on their profile page.

chase the stars, by Duskglass on AO3, 101k (@felix-duskglass on tumblr)

When Harry is five years old, a picture of him ends up in the Daily Prophet, and Sirius Black, Terror of Ministry Officials Touring Azkaban everywhere, gets a hold of that issue.  He then, in order: breaks out of Azkaban; crosses the countryside to Surrey; Finds Harry: Kidnaps Harry; Breaks Into Remus’ Apartment; starts processing (or maybe just acknowledging) his trauma from Azkaban, the war, and his childhood; and pines after Remus.  It’s a little plotty, and deals a lot (sometimes through flashbacks) with the specific awful things that happened to Sirius—largely because, after years in the constant presence of Dementors, those are nearly literally the only memories he has left.  It’s a wonder he’s got the strength to love Harry and Remus at all.  But then, maybe it isn’t.

This is a Very Serious Fic, but the rest of Duskglass’s HP work is actually just cracky enough to tickle your funny-bone, while still making you think “okay but why couldn’t we have done that in the first place.”

So!  That’s it for recs, for now.  These are all things I’ve found and read in the last month; if any of y’all are interested in my old HP recs, let me know and I can make a post for that, too.  While I’m still very conflicted about my choice of current fandom, I am not in ANY way conflicted about my taste in fic and authors.  Send these guys some love, read their fic if you’re so inclined, and leave some nice comments at the end of it.

[puppypeter]

These are all dark fics, READ THE TAGS before reading the fics. It is your responsibility to check whether what you are about to read is something that you can stomach. While most of these fics are based around trauma, recovery etc many feature triggering scenes or flashbacks as well as darker themes. Please be safe and don’t read them if they can be triggering for you! Proceed with caution! Most of them are Hydra Trash, but still not just the ugly bits as I like there to be a plot. Hiding them below the cut:

between scylla and charybdis | 21590 words

Sam Wilson has been witness to a lot of things he wishes he could unsee. Civilian families shot dead in their cars because of miscommunications at checkpoints. Riley’s body spiralling to the ground in a smoke-plumed plummet. His own face in his bathroom mirror after waking up hung-over as hell at two in the afternoon, the day after the anniversary of Riley’s death, year after year after year.

And now, in an abandoned bunker on the outskirts of Boston, a seemingly unremarkable manila folder at the bottom of a filing cabinet.

Berceuse | 10730 words

There are strange, new things Bucky needs from Steve.

Dreamers Often Lie | 11040 words

As far as Bucky remembers, sex is something that is painful and terrifying if you wake up while it's happening. As the Asset, sleeping through sex was a rare treat. When Steve lets Bucky know he's interested in a sexual relationship, what Steve doesn't know is that they have fundamentally different ideas of what that entails.

despite the threatening sky and the shuddering earth (they remained) | 71532 words

“They really didn’t want the mask to come off.” Hill thumbed through the scans, and pulled out a film that she then handed over to Sam, face mostly expressionless but for the flat line of her pursed lips.

Sam accepted the film and held it up to the light, angling so both he and Steve could see it, squinting at the outline of the Winter Soldier’s skull, and the blips of unnatural white that showed up, God, in his brain, not to mention about half his teeth, plus the mask, with its thin protrusions—

“Those are pins,” Steve realized. He looked over at Hill. “The mask—it’s nailed to his face.”

Hill’s face was as unmoved as ever. “Like I said. They really didn’t want it coming off.”

Fire And Water For Your Love | 77084 words

When the Avengers investigate an abandoned HYDRA base on behalf of S.H.I.E.L.D., they unexpectedly encounter a dark-haired man with a torn metal arm, who leads them to an even more shocking discovery deeper inside the base. The Avengers must reconcile what they have found with the lies S.H.I.E.L.D. has been telling for decades.

Give An Inch | 5070 words

The Captain has a warm smile and clear, open eyes. The Soldier knows these are tricks. He's fallen for them before and he won't do it again.

Humans As Gods | 4818 words

"HYDRA's scientists had been delighted to find their serum-reversal procedure had worked. Their jubilation was dampened by the discovery that Steve's smaller self might no longer be Captain America-sized but was still 100% Steve Rogers, and Steve Rogers was now mad enough to spit nails. A minor oversight in the design of the containment area meant that smaller-Steve had simply wriggled out of the now ridiculously-oversized restraints like an angry ferret escaping a paper bag, and punched the nearest technician in the nuts.

Chaos ensued."

HYDRA scientists successfully de-serum Captain America, only to discover that they are utterly unprepared for Steve Rogers. Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier follows his instructions to the letter. This works out just great.

The Only One That Needs To Know | 6571 words

Bucky can't control his body. He can only control what secrets he keeps.

I Was Wearing My Blue Coat | 11503 words

Following exposure of his past as the Winter Soldier, anonymous postings of explicit video footage, 63 charges of murder and the wrath of the Internet, James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes finally steps into the limelight and tells his story to Zenat Patel of the New York Times.

Compliance Will Be Rewarded | 4767 words

Someone told him once: "Compliance will be rewarded," and he remembers pressing his head against a man’s leg in open supplication. He remembers hands in his hair, and a gentle grip on the back of his neck. He remembers a man telling him "so good, so good for me aren't you?" And he remembers nodding his head in a desperate attempt to be exactly as good as he was supposed to be.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Bucky Barnes is physically free from Hydra, but the hold on his mind lingers still. All he wants is to go home, and he'll do anything he can to get there.

To Burn Your Kingdom Down | 12370 words

The Avengers go after a Hydra splinter cell with a nasty habit of brutalizing their prisoners. Steve has some ugly history with them, and when a rescue mission gone wrong leaves him and Sam in enemy hands, the situation gets uglier still.

Worth The Wound | 7709 words

The asset knows that maintenance is better than punishment. But with Steve, maintenance becomes more pleasant, soft and gentle and everything he could dream of. It was only natural that he decided to prolong that maintenance a little longer.

The Spaces In-Between | 6971 words | Part 1 of What We Tried So Hard To Hide Away

"Memories are like buckets of water: they weigh on the heart and the brain until the body fails. You're blessed to stay forgetful and young, Soldier."

Sometimes blessings feel like curses.

Illuminate The Scene | 7086 words | Part 2 of What We Tried So Hard To Hide Away

The doctors had wanted to keep the Soldier. Shock him and freeze him until he was fixed, or tear him to scrap if he couldn’t be repaired so that he wouldn’t be an entirely wasted investment. Steve is the only thing stopping them.

When the Soldier can't trust his own body, how can he trust anything?

All These Riots Of Broken Sound | 83790 words | Part 1 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

When Steve and the team return to Avengers tower to find Bucky gone, they must venture into B.A.R.F. to figure out what triggered him to leave and hunt those who wronged him. Trapped in a simulation of Bucky's worst memories with rogue HYDRA agents waiting to strike, 100 years of secrets, lies, pain and love drive the team to their limit and push Steve towards a realisation that is a century in the making.

I Was Lost But Left A Trace | 3585 words | Part 2 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

Disorientated, the Asset reached up to wipe at the moisture on its cheeks and was shocked to find it clear, instead of the crimson it has been expecting. It didn’t understand why this misidentification had caused uproarious laughter from the technicians.

“It is not blood,” the Asset told him, “but it is still a malfunction.”

This sobered the technician a little, and he nodded tightly.

“Yes. It is. But we will fix you.”

I’ll Always Be Blamed For The Sun Going Down | 9907 words | Part 3 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

He knows he’s in the right place. He has heard the guys at the docks laugh and joke about the queers who come out after dark, looking to earn a little extra cash. He has seen the johns, when he’s been out late enough, skulking in the shadows like predators hunting for their next meal, looking for something in particular. Sometimes they look at him.

A small, rusty pen knife that his father had picked up in Europe during the Great War sits heavy in the breast pocket of his jacket. Just in case.

Book Of The Moon | 16019 words | Part 4 of Forever Is A Close And Honest Friend

In 1929, Bucky Barnes falls in love for the first time and resigns himself to never telling a soul, let alone Steve, the object of his affections. In 1943, half a world away from the man he can never have and fighting for his life and his sanity, something new begins to bloom.

Habeas Corpus | 18054 words

An unexpected incident in the field leaves Steve Rogers facing the infiltration of a Hydra base and retrieval of important intelligence, all while pretending to be the Winter Soldier. Unfortunately, there are important aspects of the Soldier's past that Bucky hasn't disclosed, and Steve has no idea what he's really walking into.

Bullies | 14979 words

Written for the MCU trash meme prompt:

I wanna see Steve being messed with by his secretly-HYDRA coworker buddies. I want them generally fucking with him, "accidentally" doing terrible things to him or getting Steve into awful situations, telling jokes that aren't really jokes, gaslighting, performing sexual-assault hazing under the guise that "that's what people do now," pressuring him into other sex shit, anything, just fuck Steve up.

Steve isn't failing to fully catch on because he's dumb or oblivious: it's just that he is Steve, so he wants to believe the best of everybody, and he doesn't want to believe that he could be working for/with bullies and that (as Natasha says) he essentially died for nothing.

Not Unwanted, Not Unloved | 50320 words

They'd resigned themselves to never becoming parents - until Bucky gets pregnant and drops off the grid without even a whisper to his mate about his condition. Steve will still raze the earth to find him, but that doesn't mean he likes what he finds.

The Tones That Tremble Down Your Spine | 13889 words

Tony tells him they’re planning a party for Steve’s birthday. He knows how parties are supposed to go.

Lacuna | 62875 words

The Winter Soldier doesn't remember Steve Rogers, but he needs Rogers' help.

OR: The one where Bucky doesn't remember Steve, but falls in love with him anyway.

Not A Perfect Soldier | 93354 words

In a world where HYDRA was wiped out in the '40s, Steve is found by the Army rather than SHIELD. General Thaddeus Ross wants a perfectly obedient super-soldier at his command, and to that end, he sets out to break Steve to his will. As Steve struggles to come to terms with all he has lost, his life in captivity is only made bearable by the presence of another prisoner-- another super-soldier known only as "Soldat". Then the Avengers strike a deal with Ross to "borrow" him for missions, and Steve is faced with a team who dislikes him, an organization he doesn't trust, and the question of what he's willing to do to escape Ross's clutches.

For Want Of Him | 103174 words

It's the twenty-first century, and Steve Rogers has never been more alone. Everything he knew, everyone he loved, is now gone, and a dark, bitter loneliness claws at him, raking bleeding gashes into his heart. And then there's Brock Rumlow. Rumlow is like salt in his wounds; vicious, and cruel. But his dark brown hair and teasing smirk reminds Steve of someone long dead, and his New York accent sounds like home...He's a soldier like him...he understands. And Steve makes the fatal mistake of trusting him.

The Same Measure | 4943 words

The Winter Soldier was never allowed to stop unless an injury was too grievous.

To Be Unmade | 5114 words | Part 1 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

For the asset, things only ever get worse. The external scars fade quickly enough. The internal ones dig deeper and deeper.

But the internal scars are called love, and doesn't that make them worth the hurt?

Do Not Put In The Icebox | 7143 words | Part 2 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

When the asset malfunctions on a mission, Rumlow and Rollins learn more than they ever wanted to know about Pierce's hobbies.

And then everyone has pancakes.

The Knowing Makes It Worse | 4130 words | Part 3 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

No is a bad word and invites punishment.

Or, Alexander Pierce is a very bad man who delights in manipulating and degrading the asset.

Love Is For Children | 5303 words | Part 4 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

Bucky understands how the game works. He can't understand why it makes Steve cry.

But Natasha and the other Avengers are there to help.

I Just Wanted To Be Sure Of You | 4461 words | Part 5 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

Bucky has Bucky Bear; it's only fair for Natasha to have something of her own.

Visiting a toy store wasn't strictly necessary, but if Tony wants to throw money around, no one's going to complain.

“Till The End Of The Line | 6069 words | Part 6 of Alexander Pierce Should Have Died Slower

It's hard to take a friendship right back up when so much has changed over seventy years.

Particularly when HYDRA's conditioning resurfaces.

*if you feel that any of these fics shouldn’t be in this list please just send me a message! :) I have read them all but over the past 1+ years so some of them I might not remember all the details of :)

[madasthesea]

I’ve sort of accepted that all those Irondad WIPs I have are never going to get finished, not only because Marvel has pretty effectively killed my interest in the MCU, but also because I haven’t felt like writing in over a year now (not cause anything’s wrong, I just haven’t really wanted to). 

HOWEVER. There’s a fic that I was going to write about Venom Peter and while the story as a whole is definitely not even close to presentable, there’s a scene I really, really love and still want to share with people even though it has little to no context. It’s under the cut if you’re interested :)

(A bit of backstory for anyone who wants a bit of context. This whole story was supposed to be based on season 3B of Teen Wolf, with Nogitsune Stiles, for anyone that watched the show. Basically Stiles is possessed by an evil trickster spirit, but it takes a little while for it to take over and only comes out in bursts. It gets to the point that the audience, and the characters in the show, never really know if it’s Stiles or the Nogitsune pretending to be Stiles. 

There’s a scene where Scott, Stiles’ best friend and a werewolf, is stabbed through the stomach with a sword. They get away from the bad guys and Stiles soothes Scott like he’s going to take out the sword so Scott can heal with his magical abilities. He puts a comforting hand on Scott’s shoulder, grabs the sword handle, then twists it in deeper instead of pulling it out. This scene is based on that.)

Peter looked down at Tony’s arm, the skin already swollen and red.

“Does that hurt?” he asked, his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

It did, but Tony had had worse and telling Peter that it hurt would just make him feel even guiltier than he probably already did.

“Not much,” he said with a small smile, trying to catch his eye. But Peter was still looking down at the injury.

Peter stepped closer, his head tilting to one side. “That’s too bad.”

Tony’s head jerked up, teeth snapping together in surprise. Faster than Tony could blink, Peter’s hand shot out and grabbed his arm, his grip tight enough to bruise. Looking Tony dead in the eye, he began twisting it, sending white hot agony racing up Tony’s arm as his elbow popped out of place, the broken bones grating.

“How about now?”

Peter’s eyes were alight with curiosity, a childish sort of fascination. He tilted his head to one side as he watched Tony’s face contort in pain. He looked like Tony had just shown him something new in the lab, like they were tinkering with the Iron Man suit.

Tony swayed and Peter put his other hand on Tony’s waist, supporting him.

“Whoa, I’ve got you,” he murmured in that soft tone he used with Morgan, with May, with Tony when they were talking late at night. Tony was going to throw up.

He swallowed convulsively and he tried to even his breathing.

Peter smiled. Then wrenched Tony’s arm again. A hoarse scream clawed up his throat and even that hurt. His eyes watered uncontrollably from the pain.

Looking like a scientist observing a mouse in its cage, Peter reached up and wiped one of his tears away with his thumb, fingers brushing almost tenderly against Tony’s jaw.

Then he raised his thumb to his mouth and licked the tear away. Tony’s nose wrinkled in disgust.

Peter made a sound of appreciation. “You’re afraid. But not for yourself, right?”

Tony eyed the creature in front of him, the one that had taken his kid and used him to wreak havoc and sow destruction in the lives of everyone who knew him. The one that had no intention of letting Peter come out on the other side of this alive and whole. No, he was not afraid for himself.

Peter stepped away, letting Tony stagger backward until he hit the counter, pain still radiating throughout his body.

“Did you know,” Peter said, casually circling to the other side of the island, looking through cupboards as if searching for a snack after school, “that he can smell emotions? Only if they’re particularly strong or he’s really tuned into the person. Like you. That’s how he finds people to help sometimes, he smells their fear. Amazing, isn’t it?”

Peter lingered near the knife block for a long moment, thin fingers dancing over the handles in a reverent manner that made Tony’s stomach clench in anticipatory fear. Then he moved on, peered into the fridge.

“I didn’t know that, when I chose him. It was merely providence.” Peter pulled a carton of orange juice out of the fridge, squinting at the ingredients. After a moment, he wrinkled his nose and dropped it on the floor. Tony heard liquid spatter over the wood and huffed.

“My kind, we are... hungry. Starving. All the time. A bit—” he shot a grin over his shoulder at Tony “—like a teenage boy.”

“If all you needed was a burger run, you could have just said so,” Tony snapped, watching as Peter sniffed the jar of mayonnaise. “So, what, I get a few thousand calories in you and you’re on your way?”

Peter laughed; a familiar snort of amused teenage sass that made Tony’s teeth hurt with how almost-right it sounded. “Not quite,” he murmured. “Some of my kin are satisfied with mere food,” he said with disgust and a cup of yogurt was also carelessly tossed to the ground. “But I require something a little more filling.”

“If you say human flesh I’m gonna spontaneously combust,” Tony warned, his mouth dry.

His injured arm bumped the counter as he shifted his weight and his world briefly whited out. When he opened his eyes again, panting, Peter was suddenly right next to him, eyes fixed on Tony, inhaling deeply. He looked half mad, desperate. Hungry.

“All that feeling and you let it go to waste.” Peter leaned even closer.

“Ok, seriously, back off.” Tony retreated until his heels hit the stairs. He clenched the railing with his good hand.

Peter smiled, a sharp glinting thing and for a moment Tony felt all his animal instincts kick in, half of his brain screaming run and the other half yelling save Peter save him savehimsavehimsavehim. But Peter just turned, meandering toward the sink.

“I’m not a vampire, I’m not going to drink your blood,” Peter said, rolling his eyes. “I eat what you feel. The stronger the emotion, the better.”

He paused in front of the pictures on the shelf.

“Like the anger of a child whose father never loved him,” he murmured, picking up Howard’s picture. Tony grit his teeth as the frame was flicked over Peter’s shoulder, shattering into pieces on the floor. The creature controlling Peter picked up the other frame, the image of Tony and Peter together. The photo that had saved the galaxy.

“Or the grief of a father whose love for his son was stronger than the laws of the universe.” He turned back to Tony.

Tony jumped as the frame was brought crashing down against the marble counter, splintering the wood and tearing the picture as shards of glass exploded outward. A sliver caught Peter on the cheek, cutting him.

It was instinct to reach out to him, to attempt to calm and comfort and protect. Tony didn’t stop himself fast enough.

Peter’s smile suddenly looked much less like Peter, much more like an alien wearing his skin. His laugh echoed off the kitchen walls.

“Imagine your grief when I kill him in front of you. Imagine what it will taste like.”

Goosebumps erupted over Tony’s skin, his heart tripping in fear at the very thought. The memory of ash on his hands, of Peter begging filled his mind and he choked on his next breath. Peter’s grin widened, something feral and foreign.

“Why,” Tony gasped, “Why would you kill him? Don’t you need him?”

“For now,” Peter agreed, casually stepping over the mess on the floor, closer to Tony. “But I’m afraid he’s wearing a bit thin. I’ve almost used him all up.”

Tony’s knees went weak.

“He’s almost too exhausted to fight me, now. Still won’t shut up, though,” he hissed, closing his eyes for a second as if hearing a very loud, unpleasant noise.

“What?” Tony asked, his head spinning. He sat down heavily on the stair behind him. Peter tilted his head, humming.

“You should hear how much he’s screaming.”

“He’s—” Forget throwing up, Tony was going to pass out. “—he’s screaming?”

Peter came closer, a predator stalking his prey. Tony knew he should pull himself together, knew that the thing enjoyed his distress, his pain, but he couldn’t fight the image of Peter, locked inside his own mind, screaming at the parasite controlling him.

“Oh, yes,” Peter murmured, his voice low. “’Not him, please,’ he’s saying. ‘Don’t hurt him, don’t you dare.’ He likes to threaten me. Not very intimidating, but I do admire his creativity.”

“Stop,” Tony whispered.

Peter reached a hand out and seized Tony’s chin, gripping with bruising fingers. Tony stared at him, hatred and love in every cell of his being. He could never hate Peter. He could never forget the way Peter’s face looked as an alien stared down at him, intent on nothing but destroying everything he loved.

“’Please, I’ll do anything,’” the creature continued to narrate. “’I’ll stop fighting. I’ll stop. Don’t kill him.’”

“Peter, no!”

The thing went silent, as if listening to something Tony couldn’t hear. Then he straightened, smiling down at Tony.

“What’s he saying?” Tony asked. “Peter?”

Peter considered him for a moment, glanced around at the cabin around him. “I think we’re done here.”

“What? No,” Tony argued. Peter ignored him, turning and disappearing out the door in the blink of an eye. Mind still trying to catch up, Tony rushed to the door, looking out at the trees and lake. There was no sign of him.

[inknopewetrust]

In Another Universe Part 4 (Marcus Moreno x Reader)

Summary: The reunion you've both been waiting forever for.

Pairing: Marcus Moreno x Fem!Reader (We Can Be Heroes/MCU Crossover)

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: None.

A/N: This is it! Thank you all for showing interest in this series and being so enthusiastic about it. @jupitersmooneuropa, this is for you! You're idea was so wonderful, I just couldn't resist making it into a mini-series and I hope I did you proud. Requests are currently CLOSED but will be open again soon. Check out my MASTERLIST for all other works!

Being a hero meant a lot of different things to a lot of different people. Some loved the fame, the recognition, the money that sometimes came with, while some just wanted to be helpful and loved for their work. But one quality heroes had in common was that they were able to calm their nerves in the most crucial moments.

For Marcus Moreno, that crucial moment was now, and he could barely contain his nerves.

Clint could feel the anxiety radiating off the man. Marcus tried to play it cool because he had everything that made him seem cool: the swords, the tactical gear, his stoic face, but it wasn't enough to mask emotions from a world-class spy. Though Clint was able to sense it, he wasn't sure what exactly to say. He had only heard about Marcus through you, he only knew what little you told him, and that was how he determined Marcus wasn't some alien but the man you've been waiting for.

It was an awkward silence. One filled with the quiet roaring of the engines and every now and again, the sound of alerts from the computers around them. Clint kept his eyes on the sky while Marcus took peaks at the landscape below. The world looked so much like his own... just not as technically advanced as his own. The clouds swallowed the sip and his eyes drifted forward again as he took in a deep breath and exhaled.

"Nervous?" Clint managed to crack Marcus a smile and glanced at the man sitting to his right. Marcus chuckled, nodding his head with a nonchalance.

"You could say that."

"There's no reason for you to be."

"There's always a chance for something to go wrong."

Clint shrugged and flipped some switches as the quinjet began to descend.

"Are we there already?"

"Almost. About 5 minutes out."

Another uneasy silence fell over them but Clint wasn't contributing to it. Marcus just wanted everything to be like it was before. You, Missy, and himself in a home that felt like home. He couldn't have asked for a better partner in life and work, and it was taken away from him just like your life was taken away from you, but he wasn't going to say his life was better without you because it wasn't. Marcus just feared that maybe this life here was better than the one you had built with him. No one's reassurance except your own could tell him otherwise.

"Can I ask you a question?" Marcus glanced at Clint before returning to look forward again, a little embarrassed to be talking about you with someone he didn't know. But he knew you loved Clint like a brother, just as Natasha had been a sister, so he understood there was a level of trust there. Clint mumbled a 'go ahead' but his attention wasn't entirely on Marcus.

"Is she happy here?"

'Loaded question, but alright Mr. other world.' Clint thought before answering with the only truthful answer that could be given. He has watched the progression of a quiet depression become one of reclusiveness and a bitter happiness. You weren't happy here, in this world, with him or any of the Avengers. Natasha was gone, Steve was gone, Wanda was MIA, Bucky and Sam were on their own adventures. No one was here except him and that wasn't nearly enough to support someone who lost everything and then some because of a greedy man with glowing stones. This wasn't your home anymore.

"Was. She was at one time. I don't think this is where her heart is anymore."

Clint gave him a flat smile but Marcus did not return it. The thought alone of you avoiding social contact because happiness was ripped away from you in every direction was heart-wrenching. He never wanted to bring you any pain and a part of him couldn't help but believe that if he tried harder, if he hadn't wasted time being upset with your arrival years ago, things may have been different.

"We're here."

The announcement sent shockwaves through him. A thunderbolt of pure, unexplainable fear and anticipation of seeing you again struck his core. This was it; this was his endgame and the farm that slowly made itself clear out the window was the destination.

"Let me go in and see them first, make sure they're home, and then I'll come back. Is that alright?"

Marcus could only nod and watch the man grab his bags and bow and leave the jet. Marcus unbuckled himself because there was no point in staying in the seat. The back was left open and while Clint had told him to stay, he couldn't help but walk down the ramp and stand just to the side of the jet. He ran his hand over the side of the matte gray finish, slightly impressed by the time it took to get there. It was faster than he thought even if it felt like an eternity.

The house was a nice weathered white. It had seen better days and as Clint approached the door, he noted all the fixes needed. The rusted door handle, the broken pot in the corner, an abundance of yard toys and broken bicycle parts laid around him. He managed to open the door with limited squeaking, but Laura heard it and so did Lila. The boys weren't home because if they were, they would have tackled him to the ground the moment they heard the ship land in the yard.

"Clint!? What are you doing here? I thought you weren't supposed to be back for two weeks." Laura said as soon as she came around the corner from the kitchen. Lila was right behind her with a smile and hug for him–which he gladly accepted.

"Emergency. Where is Y/n? I have something I think she'd want to see."

Laura furrowed her eyebrows and moved to the window. Outside, beside the jet, stood a man who could have been a new Avenger for all she knew. She turned back to Clint, moving away from the window so Lila could sneak a glance too.

"What is it? Who is that man out there?"

"That man is Marcus. That Marcus. He just appeared at the compound looking for her. They apparently have been trying to find a way to bring her back and whatever he did, it worked."

Laura let out an audible gasp, returning to the window and looking at the man. Slowly, just as Clint had hours before, she began to piece together the man before her eyes from the stories you had told her about.

"Oh my God! OH MY GOD!" She almost yelled so loudly the neighbors two blocks away could hear her. Clint shushed her but she couldn't keep the smile off her face. Laura ran to the staircase and yelled up it.

"Y/n! Get down here!"

"Oh my God, Clint! She had a great day today and wow-I just can't believe it."

You had heard Laura's loud enthusiasm from the room you had been staying in. You thought you'd leave her be until her voice trailed up the stairs again and she called out to you. It wasn't like you had any idea of what was going on. You heard the quinjet, figured Clint was back, and it was around dinner time so maybe it was time to eat? It was the first time in a long time that your thoughts hadn't been cluttered with death or sadness, but those feelings lingered. You exited the room, walked down the stairs and smiling at Clint when you saw his face.

"How's the girl?" Kate Bishop.

"She's a real hero." Clint replied and you nodded your head in reply. Doing so, you managed to turn toward the window from your place on the second to last step. Outside sat the quinjet that had taken so many of you and your friends on missions that could have well been your last. But it wasn't the vehicle that caught your undivided attention, but the body beside it. Standing tall in black.

Your eyes had to have been deceiving you.

"What is going on?" Your voice was barely a whisper, but Laura caught it, smiling and grabbing your hand. Your attention never left the window. The man was pacing slightly, a nervous tick you were sure you knew.

"Laura-"

"Go and see for yourself, Y/n." Her voice was quiet too but reassuring and warm, like a mothers should be. The man outside didn't know what was going on, but he left your sight because you descended the rest of the steps and ran out the door.

The door squeaked loudly this time and with a bang, fell shut. You barely made it to the steps before you stopped on the gravel. about 20 yards away, the man heard the door and turned.

Even if the entire world was watching the scene unfold on Clint's lawn, many could not recall who moved first. Laura would say Marcus because that's who she could see, but you were slightly convinced it was your own feet. Nevertheless, after the door had slammed and the two of you met again, the universe drew you together like magnets. You ran, he ran, and with the collision, you both wrapped your arms around each other and soon your feet were off the ground.

You could barely say a word with your blubbering tears, and he wasn't about to make his obvious either so instead of talking, he just pulled away enough to look you in the face. Your eyes the same, your nose the same, your lips still perfect to him. Your hands moved from around his neck to his face. You gently held his face in your hands as you tried to control yourself.

"You're really here?" It was a broken ask but he managed a smile and moved a piece of hair out of your face.

"Yeah, I'm here."

"I missed you s-so much." Marcus couldn't help but grin at the admission. It was everything and more than he wanted to hear.

"I love you. I love you so damn much." His hand rested on the back of your neck and he pulled you to him. His lips were just as you remembered.

Perfectly him and as if they were made for your own.

Reunions were sentimental and good. But they were followed with a series of questions that were often difficult to hear. Marcus had held you for a long time. You weren't sure how long and you weren't exactly complaining either, but there was a linger question: how did he get here and how in the world are you getting back?

You had been adamant in telling him 'yes' the moment Marcus asked you the question about returning to his world. That was the plan for you. There were no other options because life with Marcus and Missy was your life now and whoever was left that loved you like family had to accept that. Marcus had explained the machine built to travel through worlds over dinner with Clint because perhaps he could be the one to help. He had travelled through time before so what is traveling through universes, right?

But later that night, when the reunion had settled and everyone had gone to bed, Marcus sat on the edge of an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar room with a woman he loves. Clint could help you, but he needed time. So, he left with the jet while you stayed with the family and Marcus. He went to go see Stephen Strange because he managed to pick up the phone late that night.

"Do you think they'll be able to get us back? I don't want to leave Missy there all alone." Marcus voiced his worry with a sad reflection. You sat up from your reclined position and waddled over to him, running your hands up his back and then around his shoulders before he gently took them and tugged them around him. He missed your touch so much.

"You've never seen Dr. Stephen Strange do his 'magic' so I think there's a chance."

"Are you sure this is what you want?" He turned his head just enough so he could look at your face. You may have been a spy, but your eyes never lied to him. He knew you better than any interrogator could ever wish to have known you.

"Yes, I want to be with you and Missy and all those heroes with weird names." You laughed for the first time in a long time and it was music to his ears. He smiled to where his eyes crinkled in the corners as your fingers played with the nape of his neck where his loose hair sat.

"I just want you to be happy, Y/n. Your happiness means everything to me."

"I am happy with you. I am happy in our home. This makes me happy."

That was enough for him. The next day you both waited... and waited... and waited for even one word from Clint, but nothing came. Sometime in the afternoon, the heavy engine of the quinjet could be heard in the yard so you dropped the puzzle pieces on the table beside Lila, grabbed Marcus' hand and ran out the door. Clint had a small smile on his face, but it was the sharply dressed Doctor that you focused your attention on.

"Doctor."

"Agent."

"I trust there is a way home if you're here. You wouldn't come all this way to bare bad news."

"Your skills on reading people alarm me, though I would expect nothing less from an Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D."

Stephen nodded and then extended his hand to Marcus who shook it in return. They introduced themselves to one another and Stephen put a gold bar on his fingers before extending his hand to the wide landscape of the farm.

"What are you doing?" You asked with a furrowed brow. This wasn't the way Marcus had come, they were supposed to fix the control pad he had on his arm.

"Do you really think the Sorcerer Supreme can't open portals to other universes? There are so many worlds you don't know, but you found the one you were meant to be in, so let me get you both home."

With a circular movement of his fingers, Stephen opened a yellow portal that slowly became an image of a world you had known before. A house, perfectly structured in the suburbs was on the other side. The grass perfectly mowed and the bushes trimmed, the mail box accidentally left open which you knew was Missy's fault. The curtains were open and the sun shone brightly into the home. Marcus grabbed you hand, squeezing it tightly as you took in the sight. Months had gone by where you dreamed of this moment, of that house and all its residents. Your dream was here now with the man holding your hand to support you.

"Y/n." Clint called out to you, breaking your stare. You turned around and he approached with his family in tow. He held out a small envelope which contained a note from them and a series of pictures that you would later cry over, but it was a final goodbye from your life here on this Earth.

You hugged them all with tears in your eyes but when Marcus re-took your hand, it felt like it meant something more than just running off into the sunset together. It felt normal and needed and necessary to move forward in your life.

"Are you ready?" Marcus asked you to which you could only reply with one word:

"Yes."

Tag list for series: (thanks for the support!!)

@pasckles @jupitersmooneuropa @agingerindenial @karnita-mexicana @mcueveryday @shadowolf993 @computeringturtle @roxypeanut

[fanfic-scribbles]

Smile

Fandom: MCU Captain America/Avengers

Summary: Bucky gives you some reasons to smile.

Quick facts: Romance – Bucky Barnes/Reader – Female Reader

Warnings: Fluff, puns, cheesy jokes, so cheesy

Words: 3344

A/N: I’m going to admit it upfront, about 40 percent of the time spent on this fic was spent on writing it. The other 60 percent was spent on finding the jokes. Also, this story is semi-inspired by the fact that my face is not nearly as expressive as it feels (I basically look like the polite cat meme when I really try and I can’t do it for long before my face hurts too much) so this goes out to other people who get accused of resting bitch/asshole face. And get written up for it. Anyway, please enjoy this goofy little Bucky/Reader get together.

  ~

‘How do you make a tissue dance?’

‘Put a little boogie in it.’

Bucky snorts and coughs when he accidentally breathes coffee instead of air. ‘That’s disgusting,’ he texts back but Sam just replies with an obnoxious smiling face. Bucky shakes his head and goes back to his coffee. It’s actually not so terrible today.

He doesn’t hang out in a dive, but this coffee shop is a type of quiet he almost never sees in the city. It’s too far from the tourism path for convenience and just outside the neighborhood purview where there are many other local (better) favorites. It’s clean enough and decently sized, but it’s decorated like it was supposed to be trendy ten years ago and the place is barely staffed, to match its perpetually nigh-empty interior. There was a short-lived attempt at hiring another person, but after a ridiculous amount of turnover the owners, or whoever, apparently cut their losses and the only constants that remain are Bucky, the lone customer, you, the person actually working the counter, and your manager.

You’re nice. You always speak kindly to Bucky and, when you think you can sneak it, upsize his cup without comment or charge. Also, one time when his glove broke and slipped off, you hadn’t even commented on the arm; you’d even helped him stop panicking enough to see it hadn’t gone far and helped secure it temporarily with a rubber band.

Your manager, meanwhile, is a dick who glares at Bucky and once made a snide comment about him leaning too close to the register, and only talks to you in demanding barks. Like now– but the five minute “hushed” conversation is winding down and soon it will be safe for Bucky to go get his refill.

“I’m writing you up,” the manager says.

You jerk back in shock. “For not smiling enough?”

“It’s what we got marked down for, it’s what’s going on your record,” he says, turns on his heel, and retreats into the back to do jack shit. Bucky glares at his back as he goes. His harsh expression turns to a milder frown when he looks at you, hunched over and staring at the counter with a dead expression on your face.

He looks at his phone, looks at his empty coffee cup, and makes a quick decision.

“Can I get a refill?” he asks when he’s in front of you, startling you out of your stagnant misery. You look up at Bucky and after a second force an unnatural smile on your face. He winces on your behalf.

“Of course,” you say softly, and turn to refill the cup.

When you hand it back to him Bucky shuffles, hesitates, but finally asks, “Why are colds bad criminals?”

You blink. “Uh…why?”

“Because they’re easy to catch.”

You blink again, and then let out a startled laugh. Bucky smiles slightly at the sound, and smiles more at the more natural, smaller turn of your lips as you say, “That’s…that’s a good one.”

“It’s pretty terrible.”

“All the best ones are,” you say, and the door chimes making Bucky break away. But as he watches you talk to the delivery man like normal he nods to himself. He leaves with his coffee to start the day and fires a quick text to Sam: ‘Where do you get your dumb jokes?’

~

The next day when the door chimes and you see your one regular customer, you let yourself smile a lot more naturally than you have been. Your face is starting to hurt and your boss is probably napping in the back, so you take the chance to relax.

“Hi,” you say. “The usual?”

“Please,” he says, polite as ever as he hands you exact change and you go to fix his cup. When you bring it back he asks, “What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?”

“What?”

“Dam.”

You giggle despite yourself. Bucky’s smile is small and guarded, but you haven’t had a moment yet where you haven’t been grateful to see it. Maybe this ‘smiling’ business is all it’s cracked up to be. If only it didn’t hurt your cheeks so much.

But as he tips his cup to you and goes to his favorite corner, you find you don’t mind the ache as much.

~

Every time he comes in now, he brings a new joke.

“What do you call a fake noodle?”

“An im-pasta.”

“What does a clock do when it’s hungry?”

“It goes back four seconds.”

“Why did the bike fall over?”

“It was two tired.”

The delivery is fairly flat but there’s always at least the hint of a smile and, you don’t know, it might be his absolute seriousness that sells it, because every one of them raises your spirits. You don’t know why he’s suddenly telling you jokes. For anyone else you might think they’re flirting, but you don’t get that impression here. He’s handsome, always looks put-together in quality clothes even if they seem picked for comfort over anything else, and even before this he has always been unfailingly polite. If he wants someone, he has to have someone just as lovely. Right?

You can’t help but think about it even after he comes back. And the wonderfully terrible jokes, thankfully, don’t stop.

“Why did the mushroom go to the party?”

You keep pouring the coffee while you ponder an answer. “I don’t know,” you decide and lift your head as you hand Bucky his drink.

The way he smiles is very fetching– not quite a smirk, it’s a little too unsure for that, but it tilts up to the side and gives him a boyish charm that would make anyone weak in the knees. “Because he was a fungi.”

It makes a smile big enough for you to feel, but considering how self-conscious you are now you quickly tell him, “I liked that.”

“I know,” he says. “You smiled.”

“You can tell?” Maybe you aren’t as bad off as you thought. Or maybe he’s just being nice. But he seems honest, and he nods decisively.

“I get not being the most…expressive.” He shrugs. “But anyone can still see it, if they look.”

The implication that he cares enough to look stuns you both to silence. He ducks his head shyly and lifts his coffee cup in thanks before retreating to his corner. When you finally have working vocal cords again you say, “Have a nice day.” It might be the first time you’ve ever really meant it.

~

“What’s the opposite of coffee?”

Bucky’s eyes widen and narrow in quick succession as he goes from surprise to contemplation. He weighs your question with all the dramatic seriousness you could hope for before he says, “I don’t know. What is the opposite of coffee?”

You grin when you say, “Sneezy.”

His smile is bright and he nods his head. “Not bad, not bad.” He leans on the counter, looking more relaxed than you’ve ever seen him. It’s…shockingly warming. You have to remind yourself not to get too close. He showed up out of the blue and he can be gone just as quickly. Just because he’s nice doesn’t mean he has any attachment here. In fact, you hope he doesn’t– you’d question his sanity otherwise. “Why did Mozart hate chickens?”

“I don’t know,” you say, eager to hear the answer.

“Because when he asked them for their favorite composer, they said, “Bach! Bach! Bach!’”

You laugh– that is, of course, when your supervisor pokes his head out of the back and scowls at you. He should be happy that you’re ‘smiling enough’ but you know full well anything you do is never going to be good. You freeze whatever expression is on your face as Bucky’s mood darkens and your heart sinks. “Enjoy your coffee,” you say, infusing meaning into every word. That ekes out a small imitation of a smile as Bucky raises his cup and goes to his seat.

Your supervisor starts to stalk over to you but you are saved by the sudden ringing of a phone, and he blessedly turns on his heel and goes to answer.

You sigh and start cleaning up the counter. Bucky is in his corner, hunched over and quiet as usual. He looks fine, but you feel bad for the interruption, even though you get the impression he understands. Still, this is one nice thing you’ve had in this otherwise miserable job and you’re not going to lose yet one more good person to your superior’s shitty attitude.

You push out a roll of receipt paper, scribble ‘Why did the espresso keep checking his watch?’ on it, and stick it in your apron. You walk over to wipe down an untouched table and, before heading back, make a little detour to drop it next to Bucky’s arm. He grabs the paper as you’re scooting away (plausible deniability in case your boss comes out) but it isn’t until you’re back behind the counter that you realize what that just looked like. Does he think you just dropped your number? He hasn’t opened it yet. Is he trying to figure out a way to let you down? You suddenly regret playing into this so much; he was just trying to be nice, he probably didn’t expect you to latch onto it so–

He opens the paper, reads it, and shoots you a little smirk. You breathe a sigh of relief and mindlessly wipe things down and rearrange well-organized creamers and straws until Bucky comes up for his customary pre-leaving refill. You’re a little disheartened it’s that time already, but it means you’re that much closer to the end of your shift, at least.

“Why?” Bucky asks quietly. It takes you a second before you remember the receipt paper and you surreptitiously check the back to see the door is closed.

“Because he was pressed for time,” you say quietly as you hand back his cup.

He chuckles. “I like it,” he says and takes a sip. “Thanks,” he adds as expected, but then he winks and you…you just stare at him as he leaves.

Should you have dropped your number?

~

A few days later, Bucky is caught off his guard and pays for it.

“What’s this?”

Bucky doesn’t get to his coffee cup fast enough and Sam snatches it and reads. “Sam,” Bucky grumbles but there it is, Sam’s eyes go wide and he turns that stare on Bucky. “Don’t look at me like that,” Bucky snaps and snatches his drink back.

“You’ve been using my jokes to hit on a dorky barista?” Sam asks and follows him across the room.

“I’ve been using jokes from the site you steal yours from to share with the nice woman who makes my coffee,” Bucky says and sits in a chair. He never stays for Sam’s group VA sessions and he should have left sooner, damn it. “I wouldn’t use yours. They’re gross.”

“Potentially inappropriate for a lady,” Sam says. Bucky opens his mouth to argue but, no, that’s exactly it, even though Sam’s tone implies something completely different from what Bucky would have said. “What’s her name?”

“Bucky?”

Steve has never been more of an actual hero to Bucky than he is right now. Right on time to walk back home with Bucky, Steve wanders in, sees the two of them, and stops. “Oh, should I…”

“Let’s g–” Bucky is immediately stopped by Sam’s hand on his shoulder.

“Bucky’s got his eyes on someone,” Sam says, immediately centering himself as Bucky’s most hated arch-nemesis.

…Okay, maybe not, but if Bucky didn’t have real problems he would be.

“I do not,” Bucky grumbles, because he knows it’s pointless and Steve is immediately sitting in front of them and leaning in like he’s the last girl at the sleepover.

“Really Buck? That’s great!” Steve says. “Have you…are you going to make a move?”

“No,” Bucky says and quickly runs down the situation, hoping that it will clear things up but knowing his friends too well. Indeed, Sam and Steve share smirks before looking at him again.

“You’re a real hero,” Sam says, only partly joking.

“I hate you,” Bucky says, ducking his head down. He doesn’t really blush anymore, if he ever did, but the motion is instinctive.

“You don’t.”

“I wish I did.”

Steve grins, as does Sam, and Bucky wants to duck into a hole. Goddamn mother hens, they’re going to want to–

“Should we come by?” Sam asks and leans back in his chair. “Be real wingmen?”

“No,” Bucky says, harsher than he means to. Sam and Steve don’t look bothered– they’ve weathered worse emotional snaps than that– but they wait for him to explain and Bucky doesn’t know if he can. Because what if this is leading to something? Is he ready for that? He thinks he might like you, but would he be okay putting in the effort of getting to know you? What if he can’t handle it? What if Steve and Sam walk in and they’re all you see? Both of them are plenty distracting, and charming, while Bucky can hardly put one foot in front of the other, some days. And what if this isn’t leading to anything, you’re just nice, and it’s nice, but Sam and Steve find out and look at him with all the pity they can muster?

“I just…want to see it through. On my own. Whatever this is.” ‘Or could be’ he leaves unspoken, because hoping for anything still feels like too much.

“Okay,” Sam says first, because of course he does, but Steve nods along quickly. It’s enough to make Bucky exhale deeply and relax muscles he didn’t know he had tensed. He rolls his eyes and stands up to cover for it.

“You’ll keep us updated though, right?” Sam asks, an easy grin on his face as he lounges in the chair.

“Like I’ll be able to avoid it,” Bucky mutters, finishes his drink, and lets Sam know they’re okay by throwing the empty cup at his head.

~

The fact that you’re running out of coffee-related jokes is stressing you out. You wanted to keep on theme but too many more days of this and you’ll be scouring the internet for whatever jokes Bucky hasn’t used yet. There are some coffee-related puns, but…the ones you like carry a romantic hint to them, and you were hoping to save those in case Bucky showed any interest. So far you haven’t picked up on anything, but you’re also very oblivious, and your roommate thinks you’re an idiot and he’s obviously into you.

But he might not be.

You do what you’ve been doing since your boss snarked at you about flirting on the clock and get Bucky’s cup ready with maybe your favorite joke.

‘How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.’

And smile proudly at it. Your small handwriting is getting better– Bucky barely has to squint at it this time, and he gives you a conspirator’s smile when he slides his twenty-dollar bill across the counter at you, with the neatest print writing along the margins.

‘What do you call an alligator detective?

An investi-gator.’

It’s cute and you snicker to yourself as you gather his change and place it gently in his gloved hand. He doesn’t retreat to his corner right away, though, and shuffles in place. “I was…I just wanted to say…” But then his eyes glance to your side and his face freezes in an unfortunately familiar way. “Thank you for the coffee,” he says woodenly and raises his cup just so.

“Of course. Have a nice day,” you say as robotically as possible and watch him go. Your supervisor clears his throat pointedly and you pretend like the place isn’t as clean as it was since the last time you went around. But now you’re thinking. About how awkward Bucky looked, and how he mentioned wanting to say something…maybe…maybe he is open. To you. Potentially.

Tomorrow, you decide with a thrill of nauseating adrenaline. Tomorrow you’re going to bring it up.

~

The next day you arrive at the shop at your usual time in the pre-dawn cold only to find an extra padlock on the door and a note in the window.

You stare, dumbfounded, and read the note. You read it again. And again.

‘Out of Business.’

But nobody called you.

You immediately grab your phone and dial your supervisor’s number. When he doesn’t pick up you call it again because this cannot be real. The job was shit but it was a job, and you knew what to expect, and you’ll never see Bucky again, will you?

It takes almost half an hour for the asshole to pick up– or maybe more, as the sun is starting to show up– and upon answering, he snaps, “What?!”

“What happened?” you ask, just as unkindly.

Your boss grumbles unintelligibly but you wait. “Did you see the sign?”

“I was working yesterday; no one mentioned anything about this.”

“Corporate called last night.” He yawns loudly. “I tried to call you.”

That’s a lie if you’ve ever heard one, but your tongue gets tripped up in anger and he says, “Sorry but there’s no room at the other branches for you, your last check is in the mail,” and hangs up.

You stand there for a while, trying to blink away tears at the sudden upheaval of your life. You should have found a replacement job while you had a chance. You should have asked your co-workers where they were going. You should have given Bucky your number.

You stand there for a little while, debating spending money you shouldn’t on a nice breakfast to wallow in, when the sound of footsteps coming up behind you makes you turn around.

“Oh, Bucky,” you say and rub your face. You think you’ve managed to hold it in, but it’s chilly and any exposed skin feels frozen.

“What’s going on?” he asks and peers around you at the note.

“Um…” You gesture uselessly. “Apparently this location is no longer in business. Just found out.”

Bucky’s jaw drops. “That asshole didn’t even call you?!”

The amount of anger on your behalf startles you. Startles both of you, actually, but just as he’s about to say something you laugh and say, “At least that asshole isn’t my problem anymore.” You sigh. You have savings, and the other job, and there’s always some other crappy job waiting for someone like you. But there’s something here that won’t be, and you pull out your phone and start typing. “Um…Bucky…there’s something I wanted to say to you. But it’s hard to say.”

“Okay?” he asks. You squeeze your eyes tight, brace yourself for impending rejection, and hold out your phone.

‘I like you a latte,’ followed by your phone number, hopefully gets the point across. After a few seconds your phone buzzes and you jump and bring it back, hoping no one texted you anything terrible while Bucky was staring at your phone.

It’s a new number, and the text reads, ‘It’s hard to espresso my feelings for you.’

You look up at him and he’s smiling, mouth parted slightly, and you start smiling so hard your cheeks hurt. But it’s okay. “I only had two more coffee jokes left before that line,” you confess and save his name to his number.

“Maybe you can tell them to me over breakfast? My treat,” he says and extends his arm.

You don’t even have to think about it. “Your treat this time,” you say, and link your arm with his. “In return, I’m going to show you where to get some good coffee.”

“Oh I don’t know,” he smirks at you. “The last place had its perks.”

Lacking a good comeback, you push your face into his shoulder to muffle your laughter. He leans into you, and doesn’t pull away even when you’ve gotten under control.

It’s the beginning of a brew-tiful relationship.

[tuckersgirl]

Possibilities

Summary: You recently joined the Avengers and have started going on missions with them. A mission goes south and it’s your fault. Steve yells at you in front of the team. Bucky comforts you. Sweet, supportive fluffy Bucky. Maybe he’s got a chance at love after all.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: ~2k

Warnings: None. This is my first ever story. I am planning to continue it, but I’m not quite sure where I’m going to take it yet. I realize Stark Tower isn’t necessarily the right setting for the current Avengers HQ per the MCU, but I wanted the story to take place in NYC and I made it so.

The engine of the quinjet hummed in the background as Steve’s voice echoed in the hangar. “You could have gotten everyone killed! What were you thinking, Y/N?!”

You just sat there with your head hung low. You knew you’d been stupid. Trying to prove yourself as the newest member of the Avengers. You hadn’t meant for it to go wrong and now the whole mission was a failure because of you. Steve and Bucky had to swoop in to save you and the opportunity to infiltrate one of HYDRA’s safehouses had been lost.

The quinjet touched down on top of Stark Tower and you were the first to exit, walking swiftly down the ramp and straight for the stairs instead of the elevator the team usually took. You couldn’t stomach being in such close quarters with everyone you’d just let down on the ride to your shared living space. You got as far as the second landing before you sunk to the ground in tears.

What is wrong with me? The voice in your head lit into you. What ever make me think I could be on this team? Steve and Bucky were so close to getting killed to save my ass. God, I’m a complete failure. I don’t even deserve to be here after this.

Downstairs, the rest of the team was milling about, grabbing food from the kitchen, and discussing the mission.

“You shouldn’t be so hard on her, Steve. She’s new here,” said Bucky.

“If I’m not hard on her, how is she going to learn?” Steve replied. “New or not, if she’s going to come on these missions, she has everyone’s lives to look out for. We can’t afford for someone to be cavalier.”

“She wasn’t being cavalier. She couldn’t have known that there were 4 more agents around the corner,” Bucky said, defending your decision to pursue the first 2 gunmen you’d encountered.

“She has to think ahead,” Steve countered. “Anticipate all the possibilities and make the right decision in a split second. That’s what being an Avenger means.”

Bucky sighed. He wasn’t going to win this argument. He felt terrible for you. You’d looked utterly miserable in the back of the jet, obviously blaming yourself for your error in judgment – and for what it had cost the team. He went to your room to find you.

Knocking lightly on the door, he waited but there was no answer. He knocked louder, but when you didn’t open, he assumed you were either still too upset to talk or had gone straight to bed. He decided he would check on you in the morning.

__________________________________________________________

You woke with a start. You were still sitting in the stairwell of Stark Tower, leaned up against the wall. You must have fallen asleep after your pity party. The cool of the concrete walls soothed your aching head. Looking at your watch, you saw it was 1:13 a.m. Probably safe to head downstairs now. Everyone should be asleep, or at least have retreated to their rooms for the night.

As you entered the living room you tried to be quiet. Just as you started to creep towards the hallway a voice stopped you in your tracks. “Aren’t you a little old to be sneaking in? I was worried about you.” You sighed in relief. It was Bucky.

“I just needed some time alone to think about things. Had a lot to process.” You were grateful he couldn’t see your red, puffy eyes in the dim light.

“What happened wasn’t your fault,” he stated, standing up and walking over to you.

“I don’t see how it could be anyone else’s fault,” you came back, emotions starting to swirl again. “How could I be so stupid? I messed things up for everyone and almost got you and Steve killed. I shouldn’t be on this team. I obviously can’t do this.” You closed your eyes in frustration.

“We’re fine. And having each other’s backs is what we do around here. Don’t think Steve hasn’t made a bad call a time or two…. or twenty,” Bucky said with a smirk. The corner of your mouth twitched up in a half smile. “He can be tough, but we’ve all been the new kid around here and it takes a while to find your feet,” he continued. “Give yourself some time. You’re going to be great.”

You sigh and turn your eyes down the hallway. Exhaustion from the evening’s events setting in, and all you want is a hot shower and the solace of your bed.

“Sounds like you should get some rest. Things will look better in the morning.” Bucky placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, and you could feel the warmth radiating off him.

“I hope so. It certainly can’t be worse than today.” you sighed. You offer a small smile and turn to make your way down to your room. You feel calmer after talking to Bucky. At least there was one member of the team who didn’t hate you.

You climb into bed and do your best to not rehash the mission over and over in your mind, thinking about your every mistake and its consequence. Eventually your thoughts turn to Bucky and the conversation you had. He had always been reserved since you started on the team. In fact, you weren’t sure you’d ever really talked to him aside from a quick ‘hello’ when you were first introduced. He seemed quiet and even borderline grumpy most of the time. You were surprised by how supportive he had been when you were feeling at your worst. Maybe there was more to the man besides his gruff exterior. These thoughts gently swirled in your head as sleep finally overtook you.

__________________________________________________________

The next morning you wandered out into the kitchen, silently dreading having to face the rest of the team. Everyone was settled and eating when you entered and made a beeline for the coffeepot. No one acted like anything was amiss and continued their morning conversations as you poured yourself a cup. You saw Bucky sitting on a stool at the counter, so you made your way over to him with a cheerful “good morning.”

“Good morning to you,” he chirped back. You saw several team members whip their heads around to stare in disbelief. Bucky was not known for being a morning person, typically refusing to speak to anyone until he’d had at least three cups of strong coffee. “How did you sleep?”

“Better than I expected,” you admitted. He smiled at that and turned back to his plate.

“Y/N,” Steve piped up from the table. “I was thinking we could work on some training today. Try to go over what went wrong and how to fix it.”

“Yeah, that would be great,” you responded. “I obviously have a lot to learn and I want to improve so something like that never happens again.” Steve nodded, a look of respect coming across his face. You were willing to admit your mistakes and try to learn from them. He couldn’t ask for more than that from a new team member.

You changed into your workout clothes and headed down to the gym. Steve reviewed the events of last night with you, so you understood where you went wrong. He then paired you with Natasha to learn how to handle multiple attackers at once so you would be better prepared for next time. She taught you several new moves that you practiced with her. Then, she called Bucky over to add a second opponent into the mix. At first Bucky took you down to the mat easily. He was a lot bigger and stronger than Natasha. She reviewed the moves with you again and showed you how to leverage your new skills to overpower a larger attacker. You try again and, after a few more attempts, manage to land Bucky flat on his back.

“Hey! Nice job!” he smiled, not bothered at all that he was taken down by a much smaller rival.

“Are you sure you didn’t just let me win?” you ask, grinning.

“Nah, doll. I don’t roll over. Even for a pretty lady, such as yourself,” he says with a wink. You’re a bit taken aback at his flirtatious comment. You’ve never seen him like this. He continues smiling, looking relaxed as he gets up off the mat and offers you his hand to pull you up.

“Let’s go grab some water,” he says. You follow him over to the benches and grab your water bottle, taking a swig. “You looked great out there.”

“Thanks, I was feeling really good about the moves Nat was showing me. I have so much to learn!” you acknowledged.

“One step at a time, doll. You’ll get there,” Bucky replied with another wink. You were beginning to enjoy this banter and decided to take it up a notch.

“What if I like to go fast?” you responded with a raised eyebrow. That caught Bucky’s attention.

“Well, if you like to go fast, I think I have something you might like.” He started walking off and tossed a look over his shoulder that told you to follow. You both walked out to the garage where he showed you his motorcycle.

“Awesome!” you exclaimed. You loved bikes but hadn’t been on one in ages.

“Wanna go for a spin?” he asked.

“Definitely,” you replied. And with that, you were on the back of Bucky’s bike with your arms wrapped securely around his waist.

He drove you both to the city’s waterfront and parked his bike so you could get off and walk around. It was nice to get out of the compound for a bit. With all the endless training it often felt like you never left. You strolled along the water for a while side by side, talking and just enjoying the sunshine. He finally slowed and turned to lean against the railing, facing you.

“You know, I’m really glad you came out with me today.”

You smiled up at him. “Yeah, me too. It’s a gorgeous day and the company is pretty great, too.”

“Oh really?” he smirked.

“Don’t get full of yourself, Barnes,” you mocked, rolling your eyes. “I was so desperate to get out of that place I probably would have come with Tony.”

He laughed at the thought. “Well, I’m sure Tony would have shown you a great time, but I’m glad you agreed to come out with me.” His eyes softened as he gazed down at you, his eyes flickering to your lips. Your breath caught in your throat as your eyes automatically darted to his mouth in response. He leaned in slowly, giving you a chance to back away. When you didn’t, he closed the gap and softly pressed his lips to yours. You stopped breathing, your heart racing in your chest as you did your best to respond to his kiss and not pass out. As he started to pull away, you chased his lips and nearly lost your balance.

“Shh,” he soothed softly. You nodded, eyes still closed, head swimming from the intensity of the kiss. He took a small step back and smiled down at you again. Your heart warmed and so did your cheeks, so you turned your head to look out over the water. He brushed a stray strand of hair behind your ear and let his fingers trail a path down your neck that had you shivering.

“Let’s go, doll.” He led you back to the motorcycle, handed you the extra helmet and you took off again headed back to Stark Tower.

When you entered the living room together, Sam was the first to see you. “And where did you two run off to?”

“Just thought my girl here could use a little time outside of the prison cell,” Bucky charmed.

“Uh huh,” Sam nodded, eyeing you suspiciously. You shrugged with an innocent expression on your face and headed down the hallway to your room.

“So,” Sam started in a low voice, looking at Bucky. “What’s up between you two? Don’t think I haven’t noticed you’ve taken a shine to her.”

“She’s a sweet girl. And she needs someone here to be nice to her. She’s had a rough start,” Bucky shrugged.

“And you’re sure that’s it…?” Sam countered.

“How about you worry about yourself, Sam,” Bucky chuckled as he headed down the hallway leaving Sam to shake his head and laugh. After years of struggling to reclaim his life from HYDRA’s clutches, maybe his friend had finally met someone who could help him open his heart up again.

[yes-i-am-happyaspie]

Updated AO3 Masterlist  (Irondad)

March 24, 2021

My AO3

****Starker-free Zone- I Do Not Ship It.***

[Updated March 24, 2021]

AO3 Profile Name: happyaspie

Joined on: 2018-10-5  

link to Profile

—❤—

A Parent Apparent

Description: May is injured in a car wreck.  Peter calls Tony for help.  Eventually they all grow into their own little family.  

Tags: Tony Stark Adopts Peter Parker, May Parker and Tony Stark co-parenting Peter Parker, Angst, Fluff, Humor and Feels.

Warnings: None   Rated: Teen  Status: Complete  [140+ Chapters]

Link to Fiction

_____

What Was Missing Was You

Description: Post-Endgame (fix-it), Peter finds out that Tony has a tattoo and that discovery leads to a heartfelt conversation

Warnings: None Rated: G

_____

Distracted by a Dime

Description: Homeless Peter Parker ends up under the care of husbands, Tony Stark and Steve Rogers

Warnings: None Rated: Teen

Link to Fiction

———-

Entangled [co-written with Moonchild2593]

Description: Tony calls Spider-man in for an assist during an alien attack and almost instantly regrets it when, together, they are hit with an orb of unearthly magic that forces them to see into each other’s past through shared memories. Both the good and the bad. This leads to a lot of unexpected feelings, a few revelations and a long conversation about whether or not things between them will ever be the same again.

Tags: Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Stephen Strange is Helping, Emotional Hurt/Comfort

Warnings: None   Rated: Teen  Status: Complete

Link to Fiction

_______

—|:|–SERIES–|:|—

Tony Stark is a Good Mentor Series

Description: A collection of stories highlighting Tony Stark and Peter Parker’s close relationship as Mentor/Mentee, some (who and I kidding…most) of them delving into father-figure territory.

Genres: A combination of fluff, humor, hurt/comfort, sickfics & injury  [Always read the tags]

Warnings: None   Rated: G     Status: Ongoing

Link To Series

———-

Beautiful Boy (Darling Pete) Series

Description:  Tony learns about a young Peter by chance and for some unknown reason he ends up taking a liking to him and becoming friends with his guardians, May and Ben Parker. Eventually, he is tasked with caring for nearly-eight-year-old Peter for a week but when the situation becomes tragically permanent, Tony has to pull himself together to be the man his friends saw in him rather than the man he sees in himself.

Genres: Angst, Fluff, hurt/comfort, sickfic

Warnings: None    Rated: Teen    Status: Ongoing

Link To Series

———-

Tumblr Mini Fics

Description: A collection of short Irondad one-shots (all 1000 words or less) written based off of prompts sent to me on tumblr

Genres: Varies heavily by fic

Warnings: Varies by fic [Most have ‘No Warning]

Rated: Varies by fic. [General Audience-Teen]  Status: Ongoing

[Link To Series]

______

Spider-man Stories Not Other Wise Specified Series

Description:  A collection of MCU based fan-fictions that don’t fit into any of the other series.  [Always read the tags]

Genres: Varies heavily by fic

Warnings: Varies by fic [Most have ‘No Warning]

Rated: Varies by fic. [General Audience-Teen]  Status: Ongoing

Link to Series

———-

Peter Parker Omo Files

Description: Unrelated, *Non-sexual* omorashi fan-fictions. This means that these fan-fictions involve pee in one aspect or another including wetting, bed-wetting and desperation.

**Omocute**||**Not Meant To Be Read As St*rker**||**Not Age-play or regression**

Genres: Omorashi, Platonic relationships, hurt/comfort, fluff

Warnings: None   Rated: Teen   Status: Ongoing

Link to Series

——– CURRENTLY ON HIATUS——-

Turning of The Tides

Description: Peter is eighteen now and everything around him is changing. He’s graduating and college is right on the horizon. May is starting a new job that will allow her to travel the country and his friends are all heading different directions to go to school. The only constant in his life right now is Tony, who is ready to guide him into adulthood and remind him that independence isn’t the same as trying to do everything on your own.

Genres: Emotional hurt/comfort, Fluff

Warnings: None    Rated: Teen   Status: On Hiatus/To be Continued

Link To Series

_____

Together Into the End [co-written with Pandalove09]

Description: People tended to think that Tony and Pepper Stark lived a perfect life and that with an abundance of money at their fingertips, they were never in want of anything. However, that couldn’t have been further from the truth. They spent years struggling with pain and grief. Though rather than tearing them apart, it brought them closer together and stronger than ever as they fought for what they’d always wanted, a child of their own.

Tags: Peter Parker is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Peter Parker is Pepper Potts Biological Child, Angst With a Happy Ending, Howard Stark Lives, Maria Stark Lives, May Parker is Tony Stark's Sister

Warnings: infertility struggles and child loss by miscarriage.

Rated: Teen   Status: On Hiatus

Link to Fiction

—–Some Fics From the Above  Series’ Listed by Genre——

Sick Fics:

One Long Night- Peter shows up in Tony Lab with a stomach virus he didn’t even know he could catch

Tony Stark is Not Sick Tony is sick and wants to be left alone.  Peter takes care of him anyway.  He returns the favor a few days later when Peter comes down with the same flu.

Peter Parker’s October [Ch. 6] -Peter had a cold.  Tony wraps him in blankets

Maybe it Was the Taco -Peter gets food poisoning while on a trip with Tony.  

Spider Sniffles - May is going out of town and Tony is going to have Peter.  By the end of the fist night, Peter is miserable with a cold.

Appendicitis it Is- Peter is sure that the stomach ache he’s had all day is nothing.  Spoiler alert- it’s not.

Of All Days- Peter calls Tony to pick him up from school because he has a major migraine.  He wasn’t expecting to meet Rhodey in the process.

Stars- Peter is home alone and sick with an earache among other things… he calls Tony when he can’t take it any more.

Fever Terror- Peter goes to bed with a fever and wakes up later burning up.  He’s disoriented and hallucinating causing him to injure Tony as he tries to maneuver him into a cool shower.

Injury:

What I Really Need is You [Chapter 2] Peter gets shot while on Patrol.  Tony patches him up.

Fourth of July- Peter manages to swing right into a drone leaving him with a concussion.  Tony helps to sort him out.  

One Little Slip Up- One clumsy mistake leaves Peter stuck on the floor with a broken leg.  He’s happy to have so many adults in his life to help him out.

Valentines Night Interrupted- Tony’s on a date with Pepper when he gets an alert that Peter’s been stabbed.  

Mistakes- Peter is injured while on a mission.  He tried to tell Tony but the man is just too distracted to hear him out.  That is until he’s crying.

Lame [Injured Tony] - Tony hurts his back int he lamest possible way.

Stay With Me [Injured Tony]- Tony get some major injuries during a botched mission.  Peter isn’t taking it well.  Happy, May and Pepper all try to offer support.

Don’t Freak Out- Peter calls Tony after getting stabbed.  He’s a little loopy by the time the man gets to him.

Emotional Hurt/Comfort:

Save Me From My Dreams- Peter can’t sleep and the lack of rest causes him to break down in front of Tony.

Everybody Has Bad Days- Peter had a bad day.  Tony tries to make it better.

Australia - Peter is tired and anxious and is mind keeps wandering back to a story his uncle used to read to him.  Tony helps him get what he needs to feel more at ease.

Three Seemingly Small Words- After a nightmare, Peter realizes that he needs to tell Tony that he loves him but he scared of how that might affect their relationship.  When he gets the words out, he’s overwhelmed when the sentiment is reciprocated.

Quiet Company- Tony is having a bad day and tries to send Peter home.  Peter Stays and his  quiet presences is eventually more than appreciated.

Breath Kid (You’re Not Alone)- Ned had died and Peter  isn’t coping.  Tony helps him through.

Entangled- alien space tech causes Tony and Peter to share memories this leads to a lot of questions and feelings.

September- Peter had a very bad patrol that leaves him more than a little shaken.  Tony is there to comfort him

What is Real (A Comfortember Fic) -  After being kidnapped, Tony helps Peter recover.