#(Oi! A two for one?? XD)

[redbritishsniper]

📼📼

The rifle was heavy when she touched it. Even when she pushed it a bit, it was still heavy. It was a training rifle her father prepared for them. Her and Nathan. At the age of 5, they're finally learning how to shoot a gun. Well, not yet however. They have to listen to the Baron explain the mechanism to the rifle, the year it was created, and the history behind it starting with him being the original owner of it rifle when his own father gifted it to him. It bored the twins but with their father being a storyteller and in his past life being a Soldier for RED, they put up with it.

That was their first lesson. Their next lesson will finally be learning how to shoot it. Their next lesson is learning to play the piano. Nathan didn't want to but their mother insisted he will or else he won't learn medicine with her.

While Nathan find it boring despite playing the song, Natasha was enjoying it. She liked banging her fingers down to mess with her tutor's patience while being a little angel at the piano whenever their nanny or their mother came to check on them. Such a little menace she can be but she still like learning how to play the piano.

[orchidyoonkook]

PG | KTH

Title: PG 

Pairing: Older Brother's Best Friend!Kim Taehyung x (F)!Reader

Rating//Genre: (M) | One Shot, Friends to Lovers, Age Gap, Slice of Life, Angst, Smut and Touches of Fluff

Summary: You aren’t delusional enough to think anything would ever happen between the two of you, not for a damn second. Be it the age difference, the fact that he’s your brother's friend, or the extremely high likelihood that he sees you as nothing more than Fourteen’s annoying little sister that he can use to rile said best friend up.

But that’s about it. Nothing more. And reality is something you’re able to keep a solid grasp on when it comes to him. You don’t let it go for the sake of acting on a one sided and unrequited feeling you know will pass… eventually.

Warnings: nicknames! a disgusting amount, language, assholes being assholes but being put in their place, brotherly love, sibling antics, tae is a swimmer and knows judo, also a Dan is--for the lack of better phrasing--a high belt level in judo. think of it like a black belt, OC cant keep it in her pants and neither can tae, mutual pining, lots of great gatsby references because I'm tyring to be that bitch (I am joking), tae has tats, OC's brother is an overprotective idiot but we love him anyway, slight physical abuse not by tae or reader or fourteen--basically someone grips an arm too harshly, some panic but no panic attack,

Explicit warnings under the cut.

Word Count: 11,521

Release Date: September 15, 2024. 12:00PM

A/N 1: The biggest most huge thank you to @violetsiren90 for being my sounding board, tech support and beta. She's a real one and y'all are sleeping on her work if you haven't alread read it. Go check her out!

A/N 2: My access to the adobe suite was aha....revoked. So! this is my first time making a banner and divider without photoshop. Therfore, the banner and the divider are a bit different than what I'm used to having XD. Tumblr is also absolutely destroying the qualty which is sooooo great. It looks wonky and blurry to me on desktop but fine on mobile so it is what it is. If i ever get adobe access again I'll probably come back and update the graphics.

Explicit Warnings: *ahem* nicknames, teasing, kissing, biting, marking (several ways), hand and finger kink (duh), voice kinklet (duhhhh), hair 'pulling' (m rec), semi public if you squint, hella foreplay, tae has a big dick, penetrative sex, oral (m+f rec), fingering, handjob?, multiple orgasms, body worship, switch like activities but mostly dominant tae, posessiveness, confessions, reader takes what she wants but so does tae, exhibitionism if you squint, slight cum play/eating, implied squirting, choking, cream pie. Pretty sure thats all of them. i never reailse how many i need to put until the list is done and wow *chuckes while blushing*

“Oi, can you fucking not? My sister’s right fucking there,” your older brother, Fourteen—nicknamed for his forever mental age—ridiculously and unneededly overprotective as always, says.

It is especially unneeded and ridiculous as he’s saying it to Tae, when all he’s doing is taking off his shirt to go for a swim in your pool. Like he’s been doing since you were tweens.

Well.

Since you were a tween and they were nearing the legal drinking age. But that’s besides the point. 

Best friend to your knuckle head of an older brother, you honest to god have no idea how they became friends. 

Taehyung is poetry and jazz and button up cotton shirts. Old book smell and expensive cologne, ringed fingers and whiskey, neat. The kind of vibe someone would get from being raised by a very successful lawyer for a father and a top ranking university professor of literature for a mother, while Fourteen is… your older brother. 

Maybe it’s a younger sister thing to not understand how her older brother has any friends. Considering you grew up with him, know all of his weird and gross habits, have a lovely dash of sibling bullying thrown in that you two share equally, and more. Yet, by some miracle, he and Tae manage to balance one another out. 

Tae—fucking somehow—makes your brother into a more presentable human being. He showers more than twice a week and wears deodorant every day now—even puts the seat down after peeing, a habit you’ve been screaming at him to stop doing since you could use the toilet. While Fourteen gives Tae a rougher edge he previously never seemed to be able to grasp, despite trying his best too. 

For example, the several delicate tattoos he now has all over his body, your favourite of which is an old timey record player on the inside of his forearm. They were something he’d been wanting to do for years, but only finally bit the bullet on and did once Fourteen took him when they were twenty two. 

Since then the collection’s only grown, much to your inner glee and mental dismay. 

And don’t even get you started on the delicate, thin rimmed glasses he occasionally wears—golden and the perfect shape for his face—or the ear piercings that just really fucking cement the tortured poet look that makes your heart clench every. single. time. you look at him. 

Similarly to what it’s doing right now, though no one ever knows due to your truly oscar worthy talent for acting completely oblivious to the beautiful shirtless man about to dive in. Call it over a decades worth of practice, and the fact that it’s also nothing you hadn’t gloriously taken in all teenagehood long. 

Every time you could get it. 

Which was a lot because Tae was on the high school swim team. 

For four years. 

And then the university swim team.

For another four. 

Teenage you was a lucky bitch. Now you’re only blessed with this sight when he comes over to swim laps or attempt to drown Fourteen. Which, admittedly, was still often. But not nearly as much as back then. 

The sight in question however, is curled black hair that frames eyes so warm you swear the sun’s relocated to his irises, and a jawline that makes the Statue of David’s pathetic in comparison. It’s fingers that make your mouth water from the way they flip book pages and thighs that make you think thoughts and things you never thought you would. 

It’s the scribbled text: ‘To err is human; to forgive, divine’ tattooed across his ribs, and a lean torso, muscled but not outrageously so. Just enough to have you forcing yourself not to stare at the delicate lines of his abdomen every time he comes over for a swim. 

Thank god for sunglasses. 

“Nah, I’m sure PG can handle it, Dumbass. I’ve only been using your pool every summer for the last 15 years give or take,” Tae says with a quirked brow and a half smile directed at you. 

Behind your sunnies, you heat up a touch, and internally sigh. Have you mentioned his smile yet? 

Because oh yeah, his fucking smile. 

Tae’s a nickname kind of person, hence why even you call your brother ‘Fourteen’. Taehyung’s called him Fourteen for so long now that calling your brother by his birth name just feels wrong. 

This being said, PG is Tae’s nickname for you. 

It stands for the TV rating ‘Parental Guidance’ because you’re younger by enough that when you were still under the age of 18, they—see: your brother and Tae because they’ve been joined at the hip since they met—were usually assigned babysitting duty. Very much the ‘take your sister with you’ sibling, but they never complained. Not once.

As much as you and Fourteen bully one another, you’re actually quite close when you aren’t verbally sparring—which is where his annoying overprotectiveness comes in. Even when it comes to Taehyung. 

“Yeah, Dumbass,” you copy, earning a smirk from Tae as he leans down to take his shoes off. “It’s just Tae.”

“It’s not about that YN, it’s about respect. You’re my little sister, and Fuckass over here,” you brother jabs a thumb in Tae’s direction, which earns you a second hidden smirk from the Fuckass in question, “Still doesn’t know how to respect that fact even after a decade and a half apparently.”

You shrug as Fourteen finishes his point and narrows his eyes at his best friend. Tae gives him a shit eating grin that screams ‘what are you going to do about it’ and your brother gives him a two fingered salute before shaking his head and taking off his own shirt. 

You take that as your cue to put your head back down because you don’t need to see that. 

Currently in very comfortable linen shorts and tank, you’re sitting on a padded pool lounger, rereading The Great Gatsby for the hundredth time. It’s one of the classics that never gets old for you, has the benefit of being a shorter read—therefore perfect for the poolside—and happens to be the copy Tae’d gotten you for Christmas a couple years ago. Pure coincidence, you tell yourself. Nothing more. 

With the beautiful addition of your very darkly glassed sunnies, it also makes the perfect decoy as you watch Tae over the top of the open book without risk of being caught. 

You firmly follow the rule of a little looking can’t hurt. 

You aren’t delusional enough to think anything would ever happen between the two of you, not for a damn second. Be it the age difference, the fact that he’s your brother's friend, or the extremely high likelihood that he sees you as nothing more than Fourteen’s annoying little sister that he can use to rile said best friend up—see: current shirt stripping debacle. It’s not the first nor the last time he’ll do something like it, and you’re pretty sure you and Tae have an unspoken agreement at this point to push as many of Fourteen’s buttons as you can together, just to see how far he’ll let it go before freaking out.

But that’s about it. Nothing more. And reality is something you’re able to keep a solid grasp on when it comes to him. You don’t let it go for the sake of acting on a one sided and unrequited feeling you know will pass… eventually. 

Despite the flames that rage and roar on in your heart. 

Despite the green light on the dock across the way tackling your brother under the water. 

You hold on. And only in these little moments of in between do you allow yourself to look. Pockets of time where a peek won’t be seen or recorded, and a moment of self indulgence keeps your sanity from trying to escape its tightly locked box.

You look and look and look until the green light is covered in fog once more, and the lid of the box seals tight.  

Another day, another glorious abuse of best friend privileges, Taehyung thinks to himself as he continues his butterfly down the imaginary lanes in Fourteen’s pool. 

He tries to come over at least three times a week. Four or five if he’s able, the more he’s over the higher chance he has to see you, not just Fourteen. But he’s rarely able to these days. 

Though the wind appears to have shifted in his favour today. You’re sitting on the lounge chairs again, reading away in the afternoon sun. 

It’s his favourite view. And it’s sweetened by the fact that you’re in the shorts he loves and reading a book he gave you. Something he’s done since before he could remember, really. 

Christmases and birthdays, he’s always given you a book. Usually a classic, sometimes something else. If it caught his eye or reminded him of you, he’d grab it and save it until the next Christmas or the next birthday, whichever came first. And you’ve always loved them, so he’s never stopped. 

They’re gifts that seem harmless to Fourteen, and for the most part they are. But these last few have been…different. Had deeper thought put into them. The titles, the story lines, the prose. He swears you notice it, but maybe that’s just his own wishful thinking. 

And he sure as fuck can’t be doing any of that. 

This cold water isn’t doing its job well enough.

Finishing his set, Tae swims over to rest before starting on his front stroke. Forearms hold him up on the edge of the pool, his chin balancing on stacked knuckles while his breath catches. 

He also uses this little break as an excuse to talk to you. He only ever freely can when Fourteen isn’t around, and right now his best friend is inside grabbing drinks, towels and probably relieving himself–which, knowing Fourteen—could take anywhere from thirty seconds to thirty minutes. So he has to take advantage of every moment he gets. 

“Got any new recommendations for me PG?” 

Books are an easy starting point when it comes to you. Fourteen may be a graphic novel at best kind of guy, but your brain can’t seem to inhale enough books to satiate it. And just the thought makes his temples rush with heat. 

He should dunk his head again.

You lower your Fitzgerald by one inch and raise an eyebrow to counter it. Just like your brother, you’re always one to give him a hard time. Make him work for every millimeter of ground conquered. And he’s pretty sure you have a smirk hiding behind the pages, though he can’t be certain due to the sunglasses hiding your eyes. 

“Maybe,” you say. “What do I get in return?” 

Answering that question about fifty different ways in his head, Tae decides none can be said out loud. He seriously needs to fucking reel himself in. Fourteen could return at any moment and the last thing Tae needs to have is a problem between his legs because you never make it easy for him. 

But rather than listening to his very rational thoughts and very logical brain, he instead decides to say fuck it, and croons in the voice that used to fluster you as a teenager. 

“What do you want in return, PG?” Hoping to soften you up, even the playing field a bit. 

And it works like a charm. 

Your body releases its tension on an exhale, your page is marked, book set to the side, and your legs extend and stretch before crossing at the ankle. It makes him wonder if your little girlhood crush on him still exists somewhere in the back of your mind. Probably not.

Scratch that. 

Definitely not.  

“What if I wanted a new nickname?” you ask.

Both his eyebrows raise in surprise. “What’s wrong with PG?”

“It makes me feel like I’m eleven,” you explain. And then hit him with a dose of his own medicine as you croon, “I’m not eleven anymore, Tae.”

No you sure as hell are not. And it kills him in a way that has him wanting to die over and over again. 

He could consider it. But he doesn’t think he’ll change it, not when PG can stand for so many wonderful things. Things you would never think he’d let it when addressing you. Things that would have Fourteen trying for drowning attempt number two thousand four hundred sixty three, and succeeding. 

“I’ll think about it—Fair?”

You ponder before agreeing. “Fair.”

“Now about those recommendations…” He reminds you, and that’s all it takes to get you going.

Fourteen comes out about ten minutes later, but by then, Tae has a new list of books to grab from the store, two laps under him with eight more to go, and you’re reading again—one bare leg bent at the knee he’s trying very hard to ignore when he comes up for air. 

By the time he’s due for another breather, you’re talking to your brother about plans for the weekend. 

“I’m going out early on Friday for Rei’s birthday, remember? And I’ll probably crash at her place after,” you say. 

Fourteen is sitting on the second lounge chair across from you, most likely playing a game on his phone if Tae had to guess. But at your reminder, your brother looks up.

“Fuck that’s right. Okay so no dinner then, I’ll just grab something on my way in.”

“Sounds good. What about tonight?”

Fourteen gives it about two seconds of thought. “How about Don’s?”

Your face lights up at the suggestion. “Fuck yes! I’ve been craving their milkshakes for like a week. Hey Tae!” you call to him. “Don’s for dinner? There’s a chocolate shake with your name on it if you’re down.”

Tae pushes himself out of the water onto the pavement and doesn’t miss the sly once over you give him while Fourteen chucks a towel at his chest, covering your eyes with his other hand. 

He catches the projectile before it can knock him back into the pool, and uses it to dry his hair.

“Dude! Seriously? Go find a fucking shirt or something, no one wants to see that.”

You swat your sibling’s hand away and give him a look that screams ‘grow up’ while Tae drapes the towel over her shoulders, a hand gripping at each end. 

“I’m only down if Dumbass is paying,” he says, smirking at your brother. 

“—What—”

“That sounds like an excellent idea,” you agree, holding out your hand in his direction. 

“—Hey wait a seco—”

Tae grabs and shakes just to watch the steam flee Fourteen’s ears at the contact. He meets your eyes conspiratorially, and you both nod before rushing Fourteen. 

“—You fuckers!—” is all he gets out before Tae and you are grabbing an arm and a leg each and throwing Fourteen’s fully clothed ass in the pool. 

He curses the both of you out several times as he treads, drenched and dripping, up the stairs and out of the water. Tae throws him the towel. 

“You’ll pay for that, Asshole,” Fourteen tells Tae, and Tae grins. 

“Oh, I’m counting on it. Worth it though.”

“And you!” Fourteen says, eyes on you. “What the fuck dude? The betrayal to your darling, one and only brother hurts. I’m wounded,” he lays it on thick, walking up directly beside you. 

You're a hairsbreadth too late to realize when he shakes his hair out directly over top of you and you shriek, pulling your knees up, protecting the book under your shirt and behind your legs at all costs.

“Fourteen! The book! I will kill you if you damage it!”

Fourteen chuckles. “Payback’s a bitch Little Sister.”

You sneer at him, checking your prized possession for injury. Not a scratch. 

“And sopping wet is your colour, Jackass.”

“Big words for someone who can just as easily be thrown in the pool.”

You pause. Eyeing him directly. 

“You wouldn’t.”

“Wanna bet?”

Your brother looks at Tae with an evil plot in his eyes and you screech as they both nod once. You drop your book behind you as they yank you up by your arms and fling you into the pool, too much momentum from them and not enough resistance from you leaving you matching your darling, one and only brother.

As you come up for air, two colossal splashes ricochet from the left and right. Tae and Fourteen having both cannonballed in on either side of you. You choke on splattered water for a second before you’re attacking them with splashes, merciless in your pursuit for revenge. 

“You both suck!” you half giggle half yell. 

“Yet you love us anyway!” your brother falsely—correctly—claims. 

You roll your eyes before trudging out, heavier and dripping with your soaked clothes.

And it's not until weekend plans are cast aside for current memories, Taehyung treating you all to dinner, and you treating everyone to milkshakes, that all is forgiven. 

It turns out Rei’s dad knows the manager of the most exclusive club in the city—Youth—and managed to call in a favour. So now you, her, and your other bestie, Lea, are all on the dancefloor to celebrate her birthday. 

Rei’s first request for the night besides not paying for a single drink, was to dress up in the hottest, sluttiest outfits the club's dress code would allow for. 

This, for you, meant a black, square necked, low cut, and thin strapped satin slip dress that hugged you in all the right ways, matching heels adored with ankle strap bows and a sultry makeup look. Lea chose a dark blue shimmery number with a high leg split, vibrant graphic eyeliner, and wedges, while the birthday girl found the skimpiest forest green mini dress you’ve ever seen paired with heels that wrap ribbons up her legs, and a subtle dewy look on her lids. 

She’s glowing, and needless to say, they both look hot and so do you. 

Rei’s second request for the night was to dance until you either collapsed or threw up, whichever came first. A goal you were all making a steady descent towards as the night progressed. 

That is, until your blood runs cold at the sight of your cheating ex boyfriend making his way through the crowd in a direct beeline towards you. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. 

You’re alone right now. Rei and Lea are taking a bathroom break. 

You insisted you’d be fine for ten minutes. It was just ten minutes. What could possibly go wrong in ten minutes?

But apparently god just loves to play jokes because here you are, three shots in, not emotionally prepared enough to be near him, let alone speak to him, and by yourself in this huge crowd of strangers while he’s making very good time on his route to you. 

Fuck! You do not want to deal with him right now or—fucking ever, actually. 

He’d cheated on you four times that he admitted too throughout your two and a half year relationship, all while faking being blindingly happy directly to your face. He’d lied to you and hurt you and made you wonder what you did wrong for him to do that to you. It took all of your third year of university and more therapy sessions than you care to admit to realize you were never the problem, and that he was a piece of shit. 

So, with the fifteen feet between you two quickly shrinking, you try your best to hide from him in the crowd, only to run directly into him when you duck past a fellow club goer. 

Son of a b—

“Heyyy Y/N, how’ve you been?” he says like he didn’t destroy your entire sense of self worth for a couple quick fucks. 

You want to down three more shots just to be able to puke all over him. Intentionally, you haven’t seen him in years and just the reek of his stale ass cologne has you close. 

“Fuck off Micah, don’t you have somewhere you need to be sticking your dick—like a garbage disposal?” You snark, doing your damndest to not let him get close. But the throng of bodies surrounding you have other ideas and you’re thrown against your least favourite person in existence.

Delusional as ever, Micah sleezes, “Doesn’t seem like you want me to leave just yet, Kitten,” and you shove him off you as hard as you can while bile rises at the horrible name you used to beg him not to call you. 

You need to get off the dance floor.

Now.

Before you can, Micah grabs your arm and he pulls you back into him, hard.

Tae watches you out of the corner of his eye, wondering why in the hell you came to this club, of all the clubs out there. 

The club he was at. Wearing that and truly testing the limits of his self control.

Music blasts through speakers that move the ocean on the dancefloor. Bodies sway like waves, some crashing into one another with teeth and tongues and passion, others pushing with the current, grinding and gripping and grabbing at anything they can get their hands on. The louder and faster the notes whirl over their swells, the harsher the storm rages on, people flowing in and out of the eye when needed. 

He’s sitting at a booth on a dais high enough to watch you in the hurricane whilst being out of eyesight, notably with one or two faces he barely recognizes enough to most likely be your friends. 

They appear to be currents. They drag you into deeper waters and you let them, helpless to their siren call. Leading you to your place amongst the sea life, and reveling in the way the melodies wash over you again and again with every song that plays. 

His eyes follow you as you dance, curious if Fourteen knows you’re here before flinging the thought out of his head as quickly as it entered. You’re grown now, don’t need protection anymore. A lesson he learned the day you returned from university after graduating. 

No longer his best friend's kid sister who they kept an eye on, but a woman who was and still is growing into herself beautifully. A woman who is steadfast, strong and more often than not, correct in her opinions. A woman who is well read and equally if not more so well spoken when she deigns to acknowledge his existence. A woman who knows how and when to turn all of that off in order to team up with him in a roast battle for the books against her brother. 

He thinks of that day as the beginning of his downfall. 

He can humbly admit that his intelligence, demeanor and education are things that have been nurtured into existence by his parents and carefully maintained by himself with practice and both mental and physical exercise. He takes care of himself, inside and out. Exercises regularly, eats well, has good hygiene. He’s level headed and patient. Respectful and responsible. Controlled and competent. 

He prides himself on these things. Actively works towards keeping them maintained. 

And yet. 

Somehow when it comes to you, he is little more than a single brain celled idiot. 

All of the things he uses to measure his self worth evaporate whenever you enter his field of vision and he becomes fucking ravenous. And all of his focus goes into controlling himself.

He’d never noticed before, never thought of you in the way he does now. How when your currents break from formation and head towards the bathrooms, their outgoing force creates a riptide that some fuckhead with a stupid haircut uses to sweep in and dance with you. 

But you push him away. 

He doesn’t get the memo, and the mophead tries his best to yank you out to sea again.

Magma flows through Taehyung's veins, thunder cracks in his ears and all he can think about is storming through the crowd to steal you from said fuckhead by claiming you for himself.

But he won’t. 

Can’t.

All because of his darling best friend. 

Fourteen doesn’t know about his feelings for you of course. And Tae rather likes being alive and in one piece, two things he most definitely would not remain should he act on any of these feelings.

You are wholly off limits, forbidden. A little too young, a little too immediately related to his best friend, a little too perfectly his fucking type. It kills him every time he can’t even look at you without Fourteen going into what he calls ‘asshole mode’. 

So you remain in his very close periphery. Untouchable to the fingertips he aches to caress you with as you dangle your existence in front of him. Your wicked tongue, your delicious intelligence, your sexy fucking legs—fuck!

He has to stop thinking about you like this.

But that only makes him want you more. 

It’s like the gods handcrafted you for him. Every piece, every detail of you immaculate, but he committed one to many sins in his past life, and now they’ve locked you away forever as punishment. 

You float across the night sky, stuck in a golden cell. Its fourteen bars hold you hostage amongst the stars, all while he’s chained to the bottom of the ocean floor gasping for air. 

But fuck the gods and fuck their gilded cages. 

He’d break from his chains, swim to the surface of the sea and grow wings. Would break your prison apart with the sheer force of his wanting, then drag you down to the depths if it meant he got to keep you for himself. 

He would. He really, really fucking would. If his world wouldn’t implode completely if he did. 

So he keeps these thoughts to himself. Forces them down as they try their damndest to bubble over and burn him, because they will if he lets them. If any of them get outside these little moments, the ones where he allows himself to feel, he would burn and burn and burn until there was nothing left. 

Therefore, Taehyung has never been more grateful that his best friend was stuck on the night shift while he watched you dance and enjoy yourself, because it granted him this sliver of time to pretend like your brother doesn’t exist. 

That you are something he could let himself have, if you wanted him to.

And he’s solid in his decision to only observe, to stay inside his little moment, until fuckhead doesn’t get the message for the third time and Taehyung is out of his seat before he can think. 

Because Fourteen isn't here. 

And old habits die hard. 

“What the hell? Let me go, Micah!” You see his eyes then, red rimmed and glazed. He definitely has more than one thing in his system as his grip on you hardens further. The more you struggle, the tighter he grasps and—ouch, ouch, ouch, yank, fuck! Ow!—it’s really starting to hurt. 

“Just give me one more chance Kitten, I promise I’ll do better,” he whisper in your ear over the music, and you cringe back from how loud he is. But that doesn’t stop him from continuing, “I fucked up, I know I did. But that was years ago, and I learned my lesson. Just one more chance Kitten, just one more, and I—I promise. I promise it won’t happen again. It won’t. I really miss y–AH! What the fuck!?”

The hand on your arm releases the second Micah yelps in pain. You look down to see familiar ringed fingers around Micah’s wrist, clutching so hard they’re white knuckled and skin bruising. 

A broad chest comes to rest at your back, and an arm snakes around you. Its large palm rests on your stomach and hip as it pulls you tightly against its owner. 

Words covered in sharpest ice are spoken from behind you, their baritone so recognizable they have you melting back into him. 

Safe. 

You’re safe. 

Exhale.

“Do. Not. Touch. Her.” Taehyung growls so deeply, so powerfully, you feel the rumble from behind his sternum reverberate into your body. 

Micah’s focus shifts from his wrist to the man several inches taller and several years his senior still holding it. You watch as his face contorts from pained to confused and then to murderous. 

“The fuck are you to tell me not to touch my girlfriend?” Micah seethes, and you stiffen because no the fuck you are not, and haven’t been for several years. 

How blitzed out of his mind is he right now?

You don’t even get the chance to deny his words before Taehyung’s on Micah like fire to dried grass.

“Don’t make me laugh, Asshole. No way in hell an pig faced looking fucker like you could pull a woman like her. Now,” Tae roughly shoves Micah’s hand back to him, and it forces Micah to stumble into the people behind with the force. “Get the fuck away from My Girl before I make you My Problem. And trust me,” Tae says in a tone so dangerous, you’ve never heard him sound so terrifying in the fifteen plus years you’ve known him, “You don’t want me to make you my problem.”

And you realize, that this isn’t the Taehyung you’ve grown up with; seen through his awkward teen years and watched come into his adult life with. This isn’t jazz music and poetry Taehyung. 

This Taehyung has only ever come out the handful of times you’ve ever been in trouble. The one who studied Judo with Fourteen growing up, the one who has his fourth Dan. 

The one who does not play when it comes to you and your safety. 

It’s enough to know that Taehyung is more than pissed off, and more than a little ready to beat the absolute shit out of Micah, if the whiskey on his breath says anything about his loosened inhibitions. 

Micah seems to sense this too, and decides to back off. But not without a stupid macho expression and two middle fingers directed at both of you as he disappears into the crowd, and out of sight. 

You can feel the tension radiating off Taehyung in waves, a coil so tightly wound that a gentle breeze could set him loose, so you turn around and attempt to safely unwind. His hand moves from your stomach to your lower back, and you ignore the trail of wildfire it leaves in its wake because Tae’s eyes haven’t wavered from the spot where Micah just stood. 

“Don’t.” You say, loud enough for him to hear. And his flame filled irises snap to yours, burning. “He’s not worth it.”

Your words seem to bring him back somewhat because Tae sniggers. “Damn right he’s not,” then softens. “Are you okay?”

You look anywhere but at him, the reality of the last three minutes crashing down onto your head like broken glass while the both of you are still caught in the middle of the dancefloor. 

The people around you seem to understand something’s happened, and you’re left mostly untouched aside from the gentle nudges of inebriated party goers whose balance isn’t the best at the moment. 

Like the mellowed waves in the eye of a storm.

Taehyung seems to make sense of this at the same time you do, and lifts his free hand for you to take. Slipping your fingers into his, he leads you to an unused and out of the way emergency exit hallway somewhere in the back of the club. It’s completely empty and dark, undisturbed besides the occasional server passing by. 

It’s private. 

It’s safe. 

You’re safe.

You’re safe.

He lets go of your hand and looks at you again. “Now, are you okay?” 

The adrenaline is wearing off, and you can feel yourself start to shake. You ignore it. Sort of.

“I’m okay,” you say. But he’s eyeing you suspiciously and rightly so, so you repeat yourself, trying to convince your own brain more than his right now. 

“I’m okay, really! I’m good. I’m–” you exhale a shaky breath and he doesn’t ask before pulling you to his chest. Wrapping both his arms around you, one around your back while the other holds your head protectively to him. Your own go around his waist as you grip him back tighter.

“I’ve got you,” he says.

“I’m okay,” you say again, muffled into his black high necked shirt, taking deep breaths of his soothing, familiar scent. You do it and again, and again. Repeating the pretty lie to yourself again and again until it becomes the truth. 

He doesn’t let go until you do, and you don’t let go until you’ve finally stopped shaking.

You look up into his eyes, and all signs of his previous wrath are gone. It seems the hug didn’t ground just you, it grounded him too. Got him out of the headspace that would’ve been required for action first, words later. But now the sun is back, it shines down on you, and you bask in its warmth. 

“I’m good now. Thank you,” you say in an even and unwavering voice, because you are. The panic and immense relief having washed over you, and you’re once again simply, pleasantly buzzed. 

Though you do have a new problem in the form of the warmth pooling low from the feeling of both his hands still on your lower back. 

You’re trying to convince yourself it’s his way of keeping you safe.

But the lock on your box has the key inside it, and it’s just begging for you to turn it. 

“Good,” he replies, still not letting go. And it’s chipping away at your sanity. “Who was that guy? I only caught the last bit of his pathetic ramblings.”

You wince. Due to a lovely combination of not being very active on social media, not being much of a picture taker, and the newly dyed hair Micah seemed to be sporting tonight, you’re not surprised Tae didn’t recognize him. 

“Ah. Uhm…That was...Micah,” you admit, unable to meet his eyes again. That’s when you notice his outfit tonight is all black. 

Oh you are so fucked.

 “As in Micah, Micah?” Tae asks neutrally, familiar with what your ex had done, just not what he looked like. 

“...Yeah...”

“I see.”

“Yeah...” You say again. Because what else could you say?

Tae cracks a smile. “Should’ve let me kick his ass. The balls on him not only to approach you, but to call you his—” he cuts himself off, biting the inside of his cheek before continuing in a hushed, caring tone. “After everything he’s done to you, you should’ve let me, PG. Consequences be damned.”

Your cheeks flame at the nickname so close to your ears. So tenderly said. And you honestly can’t tell if you still hate it in this moment, or if it’s only adding kindling to the fire his hands are fueling at the base of your spine. 

The new name he’d called you earlier, its ignition point. 

My Girl.

My Girl.

You swear, even in your panicked state, you’d momentarily forgotten how to breathe before inhaling far too much all at once. 

Fuck, what you won’t give to hear him say it again. But you’re 98.9% sure that’s the three shots of vodka talking. Trying their best to turn the damn key. And maybe they succeed in turning it half way—hell, maybe all the way, because you look him back in the eyes and hear yourself say,

“Maybe I should’ve, but I was far too distracted by the new nickname you finally gave me to give a single fuck about anyone else.”

The moment the last word is out Taehyung stiffens beneath your touch, fingers locked on your back, and you’re very pretty sure you just fucked absolutely everything up. 

Years of good behaviour, of keeping yourself in check. Of pockets of time and side long glances and knowing nothing would ever happen, stolen from you. By your own big, fat, adrenaline depleted, vodka loosened mouth. 

You're a second away from damage control before his grip shifts from your lower back to your hips. 

Higher. Tighter. Controlling. Oh fuck.

He leans down to murmur, “Liked the new name, did you?” in your ear.

Shivers shoot from your crown to your core and down to your toes. Having his deep, deliciously inviting voice so fucking close to your pulse point has you millimeters away from drowning in it. You know he can feel it course through you, just like you can hear the smile it makes him display away from your eyesight as he does. 

“You did then,” he responds for you, a cat toying with its meal as he lifts his head once more to look into your eyes. 

You don’t need a mirror to know the state of your pupils. Your gaze is glazed over in the sinful kind of way.

“I did,” you needlessly confirm, looking up into similarly blown out ones.

The fingers twined behind him release, and make their way around to his abdomen. They pause to splay for just a second at the defined ridges, before slowly crawling up his chest and meeting again at the nape of his neck. 

They play with the soft hair there, gently scratching their nails at the skin beneath where it grows and you watch as your ministrations cause his eyes to roll back, flutter shut, and his head to meet the wall behind him. A barely audible moan escapes the confines of his lips before he swallows,  the divine bob of his adams apple as he tries to regain his composure is the dawn of your undoing. 

“Fuck, PG that isn’t fair,” he groans towards the ceiling, his hands on your waist clamping down harder, pulling you so close your bodies touch in more places they definitely shouldn’t be. The contact has you reeling and all you want is more, more, more of it. 

More of him.

“PG isn’t the name you called me earlier,” you hum, yanking on a single loose strand and Tae sucks in a steep breath, biting the corner of his smirking lip with a canine. 

You want to hear him say it again. Badly. So you release the sensual grip you have on his nape, and let his head lul slowly back down to where it was, his deepening amber wholly fixated on your now entirely onyx. Your heart is begging for release from your chest, and for a moment you wonder if he can see your pulse thrumming in your eyes, because you sure as hell can feel it.

“No, it’s not. But it also hasn’t meant to me what it means to you for quite some time now,” his voice like honey, thick and dripping its way over your body. It’s making you dizzy and weighty with want. It has your mouth opening slightly as he leans closer still, knocking his nose gently with your own. Inhaling in your exhales. Teasing you. Making you work for it. 

“And what does it mean to you?” you ask, barely above a whisper, irises never straying from his as your bottom lip brushes against his in one solitary, intoxicating moment that has you more buzzed in one touch than three shots has had you all night. 

“Pretty Girl,” he breathes onto your lips, pushing his thigh between your legs at the same time he pulls you impossibly closer. You hear yourself moan ‘fuck’ at the contact it gives your throbbing cunt. Too focused on the need coursing through you like a live wire—your body pure water—to think about what you’re saying.

It’s a sweet sound and a violent pleasure he devours as his lips finally, finally, finally crash into yours, pinning you in place and allowing him to take every piece of you he wants. One hand slithers up your naked spine to hold you, your backless dress doing you every favour imaginable as his other continues to help you grind over his thigh.

His tongue slips into your mouth and you suck on it, causing him to jerk into you once with the rapidly growing want pressing into your lower belly. But your hands hold firm at his neck as you pull him into you, a knee lifting to meet his hip. Needing more contact.

The electricity filled pathways his fingers leave down your back, over your ass and across the bottom of your thigh to support your search for pleasure do nothing but spur on the overwhelming need to touch him everywhere. 

No holds barred. No clothes worn. Nothing stopping you. 

He uses his new grip to spin you around and press his hips into yours as your shoulders meet the wall. You’re left to moan sickly sweet sounds of bliss into his ear as Taehyung frees your mouth in favour of your jaw and neck, sucking gentle purple hues down the column of your throat and onto your collarbone. 

“Pretty Girl,” he whispers between love bites, “My Pretty Girl.” Over and over and it has you melting so far into him, the only thing keeping you apart is fabric and a potential audience. Though from the colour you’re going to have to cover with far too much concealer tomorrow, you don’t think he quite cares about that last part. 

It drives you farther into insanity. Years of want and restraint and pretty white lies you told yourself are crashing down on one another and it shows in the fervor of your touch, your wants, your pleads.

“Fuck, Tae—please. Please, I need you— please,” you beg, and the bite he leaves at the junction where your neck meets your shoulder has you gasping for air that refuses to be consumed gently. 

But Taehyung is a man on a mission. One who will not be deterred, and you can’t tell if he will be your pinnacle or your inevitable end. 

With what is very clearly great effort, Tae pulls himself back from your decolletage, only to kiss your lips once more. Open mouthed and dirty, tongue clinging to you like the only thing he’s concerned about is swallowing down as much of you as he can while you’ll let him, and you’ve never felt more desired in your life.

He’s hoarse as he says, “Not here. Not for the first time. Not…not here.” 

“Then where,” you ask, near impatient and far too eager as you let your hands roam wherever they want. And you find your thumbs tracing the waistline of his pants, dipping a nails width below where they should. They trail over the indented V of muscle you know is hiding under his shirt. He shudders. 

It makes you smile wickedly. 

“Then where, Taehyung,” you murmur into his neck with that wicked smile in your words as you trace your nose along his jaw. 

“Fuck, you’re something,” he says, almost pained, bringing you immense delight. To know you affect him as much as he does you. That you have him as much as he has you. 

Sly hands slowly pull his shirt from his trousers in an attempt to urge him on. It works, and his response is quick. 

“My place. It’s a ten minu—fuck PG,” he almost scolds as your digits toy with the hair at his navel, dipping lower—enough to feel the beginnings of something—but not low enough to discern anything. 

Yet.

 “Can you behave for that long?” 

You smirk. 

Retracting your hands, you hold them up to show you can be good, do a quick once over to make sure you're decent and spin on your heel to walk towards your booth. Tae is behind you immediately, hand placed low on your back, thumb rubbing circles on the sliver of skin it touches. You ignore the goose bumps that arise.

Rei and Lea are at your table, thankfully. You explain to them you ran into Micah and that it really shook you, so Tae’s going to take you home. They know who Tae is, so they’re not worried when they give you goodbye hugs or when they tell you to text them when you're home safe. 

You promise you will, and hope that the rest of Rei’s birthday goes well. 

True to his word, it’s a ten minute rideshare before you’re pulling up to a tall, black windowed apartment building.

You’ve only been to Tae’s a handful of times with your brother, mostly for things like pick ups for concerts and such, but now that you’re here—alone with him—you’re trying hard not to jump him in the fucking lobby. 

The pulsing between your legs has only worsened since you removed your hands from his waistline, and you’re close to crawling out of your skin with need. 

His hand stays in its place at your lower back as the elevator climbs. 

It’s not helping and completely helping at the same time.

Fuck.

Tae lives on the sixteenth floor and the view is incredible. It’s the first thing you see past the island when you walk in the front door. There’s the kitchen to the left past the entrance, which turns into the living space that’s furnished in a way you can only describe as pure Tae. 

Books littering every surface, warm neutral toned furniture to counterbalance the colourful artwork he keeps on the walls. There’s an old record player with a collection of vinyls in the corner and what you assume is this morning's coffee mug on the art book filled coffee table.

To the right of the living space is the bedroom. It’s a studio apartment, but Tae’s managed to keep the flow of the place beautifully with some creatively put, gorgeously decorated room dividers. And the tall floor to ceiling windows wrap around it all, showcasing the lights of the city as they blend into the stars in the night sky. 

Mesmerizing. 

Just like the man locking his door behind you.

A kiss is placed on the back of your neck as you slide out of your shoes at the front door. You angle your head to allow more space, letting the arm that folds around you bring you closer to him. The feel of his arousal begins to grow behind you once more and you push back against him. A faint grunt meets the shell of your ear before his hand delicately slides up from your lower stomach and past your sternum. It teases your neck for just a moment before it meets your jaw to turn your lips towards his. 

He captures them in a brutal kiss, drinking you in for all you’re worth and then some as his other hand replaces the one that now holds your jaw in place. He pulls you into him but you spin in his hold, throwing your arms around his neck once more and dragging him towards the living space. He sheds his jacket in the process, uncaring of where it lands on his floor so long as you are still kissing him. 

You only stop when your ass meets the top of the couch and Taehyung palms the back of your thighs to lift you, your legs wrapping themselves around his hips as you sit on its edge. 

He growls at the contact and it has you raking your nails down his neck and over his shirt as you open for him once more, tongues clashing and teeth scraping at the desperate nature you both share. You yank his shirt up and he breaks from your embrace for only the amount of time it takes for the fabric to hit the floor before he’s back on you, adding twin bruises to the other side of your throat. 

You let the strings holding up your dress fall naturally to the side, revealing your chest to him, and a  low, “Fucking hell,” is murmured somewhere below your ear before a nipple is in his mouth and you’re arching into his touch, slices of need shooting straight downwards. Giving no mercy to your attempts to draw out the pleasure. 

One large hand cups a breast, molding it to his wanting before he switches and you’re groaning into the air above you, begging him for more, determined to have his tongue anywhere and everywhere you can get it. He lavs at your peaked bud, roaming over the sensitive flesh, making you squirm at the sensations he’s drawing from you. 

You never want it to end as he makes his way back up to your mouth, dragging his bottom lip over all of the freshly deepend skin it trails in its wake, making you hazy with the feel of him and his marks. 

His delicate touch wanders the insides of your thighs and your cunt aches for it the higher it climbs. But it slides up not down, reaching around to your ass and hoisting you onto his hips. 

Turning, he walks the eight paces to his bed, places a knee on the mattress for support before setting you down. His lips never leave yours he crawls over you, settling his hips over yours for mere moments, allowing you to thrust only twice before he’s removing himself completely and sinking to his knees. 

The fingers you’ve spent way too much time thinking about can’t get enough of your skin as they skate down your sides, taking the dress bunched at your hips with them. You raise your hips to help him get the scrap of fabric off, leaving a delicate, black lace thong the only thing keeping any of your remaining modesty intact.

You watch as his now fully blackened gaze takes you in, jaw dropped in slight at the sight of you with your legs opened on his bed. Like you were the prize he’s been waiting years to claim, and now that you're here and that you’re his his, he can’t quite believe it. 

It’s then you realize that he wants you, and has been wanting you. That your attempts to stay in reality these last couple years weren’t just harder for you, but for him as well. 

It hasn’t been one sided.

He wants you. 

Taehyung. 

Off limits, older brother’s best friend, swim club participating, jazz and poetry loving, judo knowing, book gifting, perfect smile having, protective, Taehyung. 

Wants you. 

You can physically feel the gush that rushes from your core at the thought and you know Tae can see it through the lace.

“Holy fuck…you’re fucking drenched and I haven’t even properly touched you yet,” he rasps, unbelieving. 

“Then touch me and find out just how much I want this,” you whisper. Begging, pleading, praying your words have their intended effect. “How much I want you, Taehyung.”

The sound that leaves his throat is a mixture of a whimper, a groan, and a guttural noise indicative of pure desperate want as he takes hold of your legs and spreads them further. Those mother fucking fingers trace from your ankles to your knees accompanied by the occasional light kiss, back up your inner thighs, and finally to the spot where you’ve been weeping for him for the better part of thirty minutes with a heaping side of ten years yearned. 

He places one open mouthed kiss on the top of your clothed clit and that simple touch has you arching, lightning crackling through your veins with the pleasure it brings. Tae slides one single finger down your covered slit before pushing it under and pulling it to the side. 

At the mere sight of you he’s swearing so fiercely under his breath that you involuntarily clench and he can’t fucking take it anymore.

His mouth is on you and you buck at the sensation. Yielding you no mercy, his tongue swipes from opening to clit in one long lick that has you gasping, clutching bed sheets above and below your head to keep from screaming. 

“Oh my—Fuck—Tae. Ohmygodohmy—” you’re rambling. Incoherent. A mess. 

He’s consuming your very being, no nerve left untouched, no reaction too minimal for his learning as he snakes his hands around your legs to haul you closer, pull you deeper into his mouth and you can’t fucking take it. You’re screaming out at the intensity he circles you with, and you can feel your impending orgasm come rushing to the surface. You’ve barely even processed it’s begun before you’re spasming so hard Tae has to remove an arm from your leg to throw around your pelvis. 

His devious fucking eyes meet yours for one earth shattering moment as he slips two fingers inside and begins a secondary merciless pursuit on your already overwhelmed senses. Using the pads to press upwards in time to the motions he never ceased with his tongue, a second wave is cresting before the first has ceased and you feel yourself clamping down, legs holding him in place as the intensity of your release climaxes. 

You’ve never felt a pressure so intense before, it’s like your body is a volcano and you’re erupting for the first time while someone sets off fireworks from its peak. The lava flows in waves, your hand holding his hair as you ride his face, shuddering at the vibrations his moan into your cunt leaves on the most sensitive parts of your body. 

Gentle strokes and licks calm as your pleasure begins to wane and you can breathe in more than just stuttered inhales again. 

“Holy fu–” you try to get out, but your voice is hoarse, like you’ve been screaming the entire time. 

And fuck, maybe you have been. You sure as hell can’t remember or think of anything more than the warm fuzzy feeling currently radiating from every single pore in your body. The damningly  deliciously dizzying feeling in your head not allowing for coherent thoughts to pass. Your limbs are loose, your body wholly relaxed. 

You’re…Well. You’re fucking perfect right now. If you could stay in this moment forever you would without second thought. Locked in this room with him for all time sounds like the best way to live out the rest of your days.

Until you wince as Tae blows warm breath on your core and he chuckles, then does it again. 

“Hey,” you say, sounding much clearer now, “Stop that and come here.”

You slip your hand down his face and grab him by the jaw, pulling him up and over you. Tae tastes like fire and whiskey and ambrosia and you as you kiss him with abandon, near feral as you take what you want from him and he revels in it. 

He’s on his elbows and a knee over you, and you use it to your full advantage to palm him over his pants and—Fuck he’s big. No wonder he was so thorough on you. This is going to hurt no matter how much prep either of you did.

He hisses at the contact and that only spurs you on, grasping firmly at his base and roving up and over the head with the heel of your palm, squeezing gently in time with his reactions.

“Christ PG, if you keep doing that I’m going to cum in my pants,” Tae laughs into your neck before rising to sit back on his heels. He gets as far as undoing his belt buckle and button before you take over, sitting up and pulling him out. 

He is disastrously beautiful, just like the rest of him, and your mouth waters at just the idea of him in your mouth. 

Licking your lips, you hear him curse quite colourfully as you take the tip into your mouth and swish your tongue over the head. Once. Twice. Thrice. 

Tae raises one hand to his eyes and the other behind him to hold him up as you take him deeper, shaking from restraining himself so hard, murmuring to himself, “Oh fuck. Fuck me, can’t believe—so fucking good, pretty—perfect—ohmygod,” and you seal the motherfucking deal by taking him into the back of your throat and looking up into his eyes at the same time. 

Taehyung barks and bucks once into your throat before removing himself and throwing you down onto the bed. He looks furious in the way that gets your heart racing, your cunt thrumming and your breathing so fast your chest feels like it might shatter from the crosscurrents. 

He grabs each of your hands and raises them above your head, sliding his fingers up your wrists and between your own, holding them in place on his pillow.

Leaning down, he uses his lowest timber to speak darkly into your ear, teasing your swollen clit with the tip of his cock. Sliding back and forth, sending bolts of white hot need through you. 

“You drive me fucking insane,” he starts, thrusting, teasing, torturing. And you moan at the contact. 

“You make me want to throw away a decades old friendship just for the chance to touch you.” 

Thrust, tease, jolt, whine. 

“And what’s worst of all is you’re the best thing I’ve ever tasted, the most beautiful I’ve ever seen, and you turn me into a complete idiot the second you enter the room. It’s like your fucking presence takes away all the working functions in my brain and leaves me with only the incurable fucking desire to make you cum until you can’t remember you own fucking name. Only mine.”

Thrust, squeeze, glide, jolt. “Tae...” you whine, delirious with pleasure, drunk on his greed and  delighted by his torture.

“I call you PG because it’s the only way I can get away with calling you anything more than your name around him.” He sounds almost angry with how low he growls. “And it means so much more than you could think.”

He leans further into you, so close now that his lips brush your ear as he speaks. 

“My Pretty Girl,” thrust, “My Precious Girl,” moan, “My Perfect Fucking Girl.” 

He releases one hand to line himself up with your entrance. “That’s who you are to me. That’s what I’m calling you when I call you PG. My Pretty, Precious, Perfect Girl. My Girl.” He slips past your walls, sinking deep and you both groan in euphoric unison. “Mine.”

Tae pulls out, slow and controlled. 

Blissful. 

Then pushes back in, methodically. 

Torturous. 

Feeling every inch you can take, which is every single fucking one.

Inevitable.

Bottoming out for the second time, you whisper, “Yours,” into his ear, and he turns fucking ravenous.

Setting an absolutely ruthless pace, he claims your body, taking what’s so clearly always been his. Your legs wrap around him again, digging a heel into his ass as you drive him closer, harder with every push. Then lay claim to the one thing you’re able to, taking his lips with yours and biting down hard enough to draw the most sinful groan from the back of his throat. Hoarse, deep, almost broken with how raw it is. 

One hand bruises its fingerprints into your hip while the other holds him up over you, and you use this to your advantage, slipping one leg around his and flipping the both of you over. 

You trail your tongue down his jaw to his clavicle, he tastes of sweat and lust and sex and it is the most intoxicating thing you’ve ever consumed. Creating your own gardens of little blooming flowers down one side of his neck and up the other, Taehyung moans greedily into your ear as your ride to match his thrusts, sending him deeper while you decorate your willing canvas. 

Because as much as he wishes to lay claim to your body, you want to claim his as well. 

“Mine,” you say, positioning yourself to take over completely, using the springs of the mattress to do most of the work for you. 

“Yes,” he says. But that’s not good enough. 

“Mine,” you demand, and let loose, pressing down on the mattress with your knees rapidly, creating the glorious effect you wanted. You watch as the up force from the mattress causes Taehyung to be driven into you so quickly he throws his head back, mouth dropped in pure ecstasy. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, YN, What the fuck—” he rambles, lost to the pleasure, biting his lip, going slackjawed, clenching and unclenching his fists into bedsheets that already have your handprints seared into them.

And you keep going, a little torture creation of your own. 

“Mine,” you demand again, and this time, it clicks.

“Yours! Fuck, yours. All yours, only yours,” he surrenders and you slow back down to a regular pace, breathless. 

It’s a great move but it’s exerting. 

You all but collapse on his chest and he takes over, thrillingly pissed off due to your power play. 

“So that’s how it’s going to be?” he asks, and you clench at his tone. 

He removes himself and you whimper, but he’s maneuvering you like a ragdoll on the bed and you’re more than fucking willing to be thrown around. 

He’s kneeling on the bed, lifting your hips and sliding into you in a doggy style, but then he’s doing the most insane thing you think you’ve ever seen. With an arm around your stomach he brings your back to his torso and twists you both to face the open floor to ceiling windows. One of your legs is thrown over his that’s up to splay you wide for the skyline to see, and you can see your reflection in the glass. 

You look beyond fucked out, and so does he, and it’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen. But then his hand is sliding to your throat, and a whispered, “Is this okay?” finds your ears. You nod.

Gripping the sides of your throat, he slides his other hand to graze your clit before beginning his own version of the move you just pulled. Pumping into you at a pace that has your g-spot screaming from all of the attention it’s receiving, his fingers swiping deftly over the bundled nerves at the apex of your thigh whilst lightly cutting off the blood supply to your brain. 

It has you twitching and hazy and dizzy in seconds. You can see yourself losing to the feeling so steadily building at the base of your spine in the glass. Mouth open, body willing, the man who’s been at the center of your wanting for longer than you can remember, its deliverance. 

Dark, sex tousled hair, muscled forearms holding you up and driving you insane. Blackened eyes focused on you and only you through the mirror the darkness of the night’s sky has created for you. 

It’s that visual that sets you over the edge when he releases your throat, and you feel a gush flowing from where you two meet.

“Fuuuck yes. My Perfect Girl, cum all over my sheets, drench my cock. That’s it,” he purrs in your ear and it’s doing nothing but sending shock after shock into your already over sensitive and pulsing cunt, letting your consciousness float somewhere above or below you, you don’t really care. 

All you know is that you feel light as a feather and not of this earthly plane. 

Taehyung removes himself and lies you down gently. He’s back inside soon after and it just feels right as he fills you, like it’s where he’s meant to be. 

He hovers over you once more, and you lift a single knee to his hip, mimicking your position from the club as he thrusts into you with fervor, chasing his own high after delivering three mind shattering ones to you. 

Reaching one hand to his cheek, you hold him as he kisses you, working himself to completion. 

Using your other to deliver a few expert circles to your clit, so you can come together, you breathe in each other's release and  drown in once another’s embrace. 

You leave his name on your tongue this time. A gift. A cry so delicate that a tear falls from your cheek and he kisses it away.

Taehyung inhales sharply, before stuttering his exhale and an exquisite warmth fills you.

“F-f-uu-ckkk,” he shudders as he lets the aftershocks of his release claim you in the most basic and animalistic of ways. You drink in the vulnerable sound, taking his mouth with yours one final time as you bask in each other's pleasure. Silent but for catching breaths, exertion evident as you hold one another. 

Taehyung rests on your chest. Lines are sketched gently with your nails up and down his spine and into his hair as he comes down, content in the afterglow, where nothing is wrong and everything is perfect. 

Before consequences kick in and regrets form. 

When he decides he’s ready, Tae lifts and removes himself from you and you can feel the remnants of your combined efforts slide down to the bedsheets. 

Tae takes a single finger and gathers it up before pressing it back in. You hiss at the now tender flesh. Though the pain doesn’t stop the warmth newly pooling at the sight and feel and meaning. 

He pumps it back in once, twice before removing his finger and placing it in his mouth to clean off. Your cunt flutters at the sight and Tae smirks, leaning forward to share his findings with you in the form of a filthy, open mouthed, tongue filled kiss. It’s slightly salty, slightly metallic but you pull him back for one last lick when he tries to pull away. 

Watching him kneeling there, in the glow of moonlight, you realize just how truly beautiful he is. The shape of his illuminated profile, the expanse of his chest as he breathes in, the colour of his skin under silver rays. He’s stunning. 

You smile up at him, spent, sated and so astronomically fucked if your brother ever finds out. 

Tae must see the thought on your face, because he says, “Don’t worry about him. I’ll handle it.”

But you honestly don’t give a fuck about that right now. That’s a tomorrow issue. What you want to know is, “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what, exactly?” He specifies. 

You sit up, eye to eye as he sits on the edge of the bed, one leg on the ground. 

“All of it. Any of it.”

There. 

Now it was out in the open. And the rest is up to him. 

You could drag yourself back down to reality. Chalk this night up to booze and bad timing and perfect timing. Could convince yourself it was just one night and that it would have to be enou—

“All of it,” he interrupts, the most sincere expression you’ve ever seen on him on full display. “Definitely all of it. Every last fucking word.”

You slump on your exhale, so fucking relieved you didn’t have to keep trying to lie to yourself that you could forget this happened. 

You’re laughing before you can fight it off, shoulders shaking. Smiling so wide it hurts. 

“Uh..YN?” Tae asks, clearly not sure how to take your reaction and you compose yourself. 

“That’s PG to you,” you say as you crawl onto his lap, and kiss him into oblivion. 

It’s interesting to finally sit on the dock across the way in East Egg. 

The fog is gone, the sky is a brilliant blue, and the little box you kept sits open next to you, the lock and its key lost somewhere to the depths below your feet. Funny how harmless it seems now that there’s nothing locked inside anymore, like it could never really have hurt you in the first place. 

You take in your newly emptied creation, and quirk a brow when you see it move. 

A wiggle at first, before it’s shaking and spinning and shrinking, turning from a box into a glass windowed locket. Golden and delicate and beautiful, with a matching chain. You ponder for a moment what it could be for, before turning to look down at the green light to your right. 

An idea strikes. 

Unclasping the little window, you lift the opened pendant to the green light. And to your delight, the emerald hue hops into its new home, closing its tiny windowed door. 

You smile at the clever little light, lacing the chain around your neck, resting it on the middle of your sternum, right above your heart. Its brilliant hue shining brightly through the pane for all to see.

Funny how the green light you so longed for, longed for you back, and is now yours for keeps.

A/N 2.5: This is what has been rotting in my brain for the better half of two weeks so please enjoy, it was supposed to be short and trope filled to cure my writers block but apparently I am incapable of short. But trope filled it clearly is. Overall tho, I'm quite pleased with this one.

A/N 3: As always, thanks for reading, loves. Xoxo, - Yoon <3

Masterlist

[once-upon-an-imagine]

You're Still The One - Sirius Black

A/N: ahh! well here it is! I really hope you loves like it as much as the preview! so, here we go!

Requests: - Anonymous asked: Sirius x Potter!sister where she raises Harry and they reunite once he’s out of Azkaban but she has to tell him that he’s a father too (up to you if they had a son or daughter) - twilightlover2007 asked: I would love to see post-askaban Sirius with a single mama(witch or muggle). The little one could be hers or she adopted the child when her friends were killed, thinking the little one is 6months to a year and when able to walk the little one just FOLLOWS Sirius everywhere. Even bumping into his legs when he stops walking suddenly. His own little duckling! Please and thank you!

Warnings: this is very much AU because Sirius gets out of Azkaban earlier and Remus was kinda working his case and visiting him there, so if you don't like that then, this is not the story for you xD, also mentions of sex and I think that's it but let me know if I missed anything!

Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter :) gif isn’t mine :D  

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

You're Still The One

You’re still the one I run to The one that I belong to You’re still the one I want for life

“Hey, Remus, do you have any milk? I ran out and didn’t have time to go to the store-”

As soon as you walked into Remus’ home, Sirius instantly froze when he heard your voice. That beautiful voice he hadn’t heard in three years. It wasn’t something unusual for you to walk into the next house as casually as you did. But this wasn’t the way it was supposed to go. Sirius was still getting ready to see you. Which is why, when you came back up, the milk bottle slipped out of your hand and broke down on the floor as soon as you saw someone standing in the living room— a half-naked someone covered in tattoos, who definitely wasn’t Remus.

“Love” Sirius smiled, looking at you. The same smile he always had when he looked at you. He was about to walk your way, but you quickly grabbed what was nearest to you, which happened to be the newspaper on the table. You cursed silently for leaving your wand in your own kitchen. “What are you gonna do? Kill a spider-?”

“Who are you?”

“Bambi, it’s me-” he started, but you backed away.

“No! Do not call me that! It can’t be you! Y-you’re not here!” you said, feeling your eyes welling up.

He couldn’t be here. Sirius was in Azkaban. You knew that. You hadn’t seen him in three years. He couldn’t be just standing here in the middle of Remus’ living room.

“Sweetheart, I can explain-”

“REMUS!”

“What?” you heard Remus’ voice coming downstairs with clothes for Sirius. “Oh shit” he muttered when he spotted you.

“What the fuck is going on?” you asked, still with the newspaper in front of you.

“Calm down, okay?”

“Calm down!?”

“Bambi-”

“Shut up! Don’t call me that!” you said, turning to Sirius with your paper and he placed his hands up in surrender.

“Okay, put the paper down” Remus said, walking closer to you and pointing his wand to clean up the milk on the floor. "Just calm down, and listen to me, okay?"

"I'm listening..."

"Are you calmed?" Remus asked.

"...I'm listening" you repeated.

“Look, first of all, please don’t be mad at Moony, okay? I asked him not to tell you I was getting out until we were sure” Sirius insisted.

“Oh, and just how long were the two of you in on this?”

Sirius and Remus exchanged a look you had seen too many times back at Hogwarts before Remus responded.

“Two months” he said, taking a few steps back when you were going to hit him with the paper again but Sirius got in the middle.

“TWO MONTHS! You have been in touch with Sirius and you knew he was getting out and you hid this from me for two months?! You knew all this time and you didn’t tell me? You kept the love of my life away from me?”

“So, I’m still the love of your life?”

“I don’t know! I’m still mad at you!”

“What? Why are you mad at me for? Be mad at Moony!”

“Oi! You just told her not to be mad at me!”

“I know but I’d rather have her be mad at you than me!”

“Enough!” you yelled, making the two of them look at you. “One of you just… tell me what the bloody hell is going on!”

“I didn’t do it, love” Sirius told you.

“Well, I obviously know that part” you frowned.

“Y-you do?”

“I told you” Remus repeated, rolling his eyes. “Look, I didn’t want to tell you until we were certain and we could actually have enough to get him out” Remus explained.

“Why are you two looking at me like that? The last time you looked at me like that, you told me Remus was a werewolf” you said, nervously.

“It was Peter” Remus told you.

“W-what?” you asked, feeling your heart drop. You slowly sat down on Remus’ kitchen table. The two friends looked at each other and sat down with you. “B-but Peter’s dead-”

“He’s not” Sirius told you. “We decided, James and I…” he said, noticing the pained expression on your face when he mentioned your brother. “I suggested Peter should be the Secret-Keeper and not me. We didn’t tell anyone” he explained. “I- I didn’t think he would-” he choked as a few tears ran down his face. “I am so sorry, love” he said, trying to grab your hand but you quickly pulled it away.

“James would have told me” you said, not really knowing what else to think. You always knew it wasn’t Sirius. It couldn’t have been. You knew Sirius would die before he’d let anything happen to James or Lily. But you couldn’t believe it was Peter either. “H-how come none of us knew?”

“We thought it was best that way” Sirius confessed. “After… what happened” he continued. “I tracked Peter down and when I cornered him, he yelled for the whole street to hear that I’d betrayed Lily and James. Then, before I could curse him, he blew apart the street with the wand behind his back, killed everyone within twenty feet of himself- and sped down into the sewer with the other rats” he explained.

“Scabbers” you muttered. “He’s been hiding as Scabbers this whole time?” you said as more tears ran down your face.

“I didn’t want to tell you because I had to find him first” Remus told you. “I couldn’t get Sirius out if they still thought Peter was dead” he explained.

“So you-” you said, looking at Remus. “Y-you found him? You found Peter?”

“I did” Remus nodded.

“And he’s-?”

“He is” Sirius assured you.

“H-how long have you known it was Peter?” you asked Remus, who nervously looked at Sirius.

“Since the night Sirius was taken away” Remus replied and you only nodded.

“D-do you have any other questions, love?” Sirius asked.

“What time is it?” you questioned, getting up. “I have to go back and make breakfast and-”

“I’ll take care of that” Remus said, getting up too. “I think there’s still a lot you two need to talk about he said, looking between you and Sirius before he pulled you closer to him as Sirius went back to get the clothes Remus had brought for him. “He doesn’t know” he informed you and your eyes widened in surprise.

“Y-you didn’t tell him?”

“I couldn’t” Remus admitted. “Look, I know you begged me a million times to take you to see him-”

“You always said no!”

“Yes, because he made me promise to never take you there and he’s right. You don’t ever want to see that horrible place” he said. “And you wouldn’t want to see him that way” he continued. “He was completely shattered, and the biggest part that was killing him was that he had failed you and Harry. So, I didn’t have the heart to tell him there was someone else. It would have killed him” he explained.

“Okay” you nodded.

You knew it wasn’t Remus’ story to tell. You had to do that. It just made you incredibly anxious but when you looked back at Sirius, you felt the same butterflies you did so many years ago. This was Sirius. Your Sirius.

“It’ll be okay, love” Remus said, kissing the side of your head. “I’ll be next door when you’re ready” he smiled.

“Thanks, Rem” you smiled back at him, giving him a hug.

“Just please don’t have sex on my bed… again” he muttered, making you push him off.

“No promises” you chuckled.

“I mean it, Potter!” you heard him yell as he left.

“What’s he on about?” Sirius asked as you entered the living room.

“He doesn’t want us to have sex on his bed” you told him. “Again.”

“Well, there goes my question to know if you wanted to go have sex on Moony’s bed again” he said, raising his eyebrow suggestively at you and making you chuckle slightly.

“I think we scarred him for life when he walked in on us in school” you reminded him, making him laugh. Merlin, how you had missed his laugh. You slowly walked closer to Sirius and sat on the sofa too.

“Hi, sunshine” he smiled at you.

“Hi” you said shyly, playing with your hands, which Sirius knew meant you were nervous. He slowly reached out and held your hand in his. “I’m sorry” you smiled, shedding a few tears and squeezing his hand tighter.

“Why are you sorry, love?”

“I don’t know” you chuckled. “For threatening you with a newspaper?”

“It’s not the first time” he reminded you before you threw your arms around his shoulders and he quickly wrapped his around your waist, bringing you closer.

“I missed you so much” you said, clinging on to him, feeling that they would rip him away from you again at any second.

“I missed you too, my love” he said, feeling his eyes watering as well.

“I-” you said, sighing. “How-” you stuttered. “I- um-”

“I’m fine, love” he assured you, knowing that’s what you wanted to ask him. “I’m here with you and I’m gonna be fine, and that’s all that matters, okay?”

“I knew you didn’t do it” you said, with your voice breaking a little. Sirius pulled you away and cupped your cheeks with his hands. “You know that, right?”

“Of course, I know that, sweetheart” he assured you. “You and Harry were the only thing keeping me sane in that place” he said. “I knew I had to make my way back to the two of you” he smiled.

“S-Sirius-”

“Oh, and Moony, if he asks, I mean” he smiled. “How is Harry? He’s about four now, right?”

“He is, b-but um, Sirius-”

“Merlin, I am dying to see him! I bet he looks just like…” he stopped, not wanting to mention James’ name again and make you upset. “Um… does he- uh… does he know about me?”

“He does” you nodded, making him smile brightly at you. “But… um… Sirius, there’s… something we need to talk about” you said, nervously.

“Oh, I… well, I understand if you don’t want me to see him… right away, I mean, I don’t want to come back here and expect you to change your whole life for me. That’s regarding us as well, I mean, I guess we should have that conversation-”

“Sirius!” you said, getting up and walking away from him. You took a deep breath and tried to calm yourself down. “I know that… there’s a lot of things that we have to discuss and talk about but… um…” you said, looking away and sitting down on the coffee table in front of him. “There’s something very important that I need to tell you” you said feeling extremely anxious.

“What’s wrong, love?” he asked, worriedly. “Is it about Harry? Do you not want me to see him yet?” he said. “Cause I would understand if-”

“No, um, is not about that” you said. “Well, I mean, it is, but… umm… Sirius” you said, taking a deep breath as he held your hands in his. “There’s… there’s someone else” you said, making him let go of your hands instantly.

“Oh” he said, with his expression stiffening a little as he felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. “I uh-” he cleared his throat. “Well, I uh-” he said, brushing a hand through his hair frustrated. “I didn’t think you’d be waiting for me and- I um-”

“W-what? No! Sirius, that is not what I mean!” you said, grabbing his hands again and he looked at you, still a bit unsure. “Sirius… you are the love of my life” you said, with a few tears rolling down your cheeks again. “That was never going to change. I would have always been waiting for you” you assured him. “What I meant was is… there’s someone else… other than Harry” you added.

“W-what do you mean?”

“Um… a few weeks after they took you away I… I found out I was pregnant” you informed him.

“Y-you-? W-what?” he asked, looking stunned. “Y-you- um- we, we have a child?” he asked, feeling his heart beating incredibly fast and breaking at the same time.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I… didn’t really know how. And Remus wouldn’t let me go with him-”

“No!” he snapped a little, bringing you closer to him. “I never wanted you to go there or see me like that” he said, cupping your cheek with his hand. “Sweetheart, I am so sorry you had to go through this all by yourself! I- I wasn’t here for you! I-”

“No, Sirius, you don’t have to be sorry” you assured him.

“I can’t believe we have a kid” he said with a beautiful smile appearing on his face and you gently grabbed his hand from your cheek.

“Her name is Lyra” you said, making Sirius’ heart stop again as he felt tears rolling down his cheeks.

“We have a girl?” he asked, choking a little and you nodded, smiling.

“Would you like to meet her?”

“R-really?”

“I know there’s still a million things we have to talk about but, if you want to, I would love for you to see Harry and meet Lyra” you said getting up and pulling him with you. “Ready?” you started walking towards the door but Sirius didn’t move. “Sirius?”

“D-do you think they’ll like me?” he asked worriedly, warming your heart. You cupped his cheek and smiled at him.

“They’re gonna love you” you assured him. “They already do. Harry has always been dying to know his uncle Padfoot” you informed him. “I told him he was traveling around the world so he’s probably going to ask you a billion questions” you said, smiling. “And he’s always telling Lyra how cool you are” you added. “She smiles a lot when she sees your picture” you explained. “I told you, I knew you didn’t do it” you said. “And I was not going to let Harry or your daughter grow up thinking you were a-” you choked, not able to finish that sentence. You were never able to. You never believed Sirius would kill your brother and his wife. He would have died before let anything happen to them.

“I love you” he said, hugging you closer to him. “I love you so much” he said with tears streaming down his face as he brought you closer, kissing your forehead.

“I love you too” you smiled, wiping away his tears before you pulled him closer and kissed him. It felt like every single time you had kissed Sirius. It didn’t matter what else the two of you had to discuss. Your feelings hadn’t changed. You knew that. Sirius was the love of your life. And now, he was back.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

As soon as Sirius walked into the house next door to Remus’, he instantly felt at home, just like he did when he ran away to your parents’ house all those years ago. Except it was a lot cozier and it certainly had your touch everywhere.

“Please don’t mind the mess” you smiled nervously at him as you started grabbing some things and finding your wand somewhere so you quickly fixed everything up. “I would have cleaned up but- um… well, I wasn’t really expecting-”

Sirius cut you off by giving you a peck on the lips. “Please don’t ever apologize for that. Not to me, love” he insisted and you smiled back at him.

“Harry, are you up, sweetie?” you asked, hearing noise coming from the kitchen.

“I’m in here, Aunt Bambi” you heard. You were about to walk over there but Sirius pulled you back.

“Aunt Bambi?” he asked with an arched eyebrow.

“He kept pestering me one day asking why Moony had a nickname, his father had a nickname and you had a nickname, and I didn’t, so Remus told him you used to call me Bambi, and… it kind of stuck with him” you explained.

“I’m glad you kept hearing that nickname you claim to hate so much” he smirked.

“It kinda grew on me” you admitted, rolling your eyes a little. “Hi sweetheart” you said, spotting Harry with chocolate all over his face.

“Uncle Moony made chocolate chip pancakes!” he said, excitedly.

“I can see that” you chuckled, walking over to him and cleaning his face. “And where is Uncle Moony?”

“He’s upstairs, changing Lyra” he replied as you finished cleaning him up.

“Um, honey, I would like you to meet someone” you said as Sirius stood at the entrance. You saw Harry’s face light up as he got off the stool and ran over to him.

“UNCLE PADFOOT!”

“Hey, bud” Sirius said, kneeling to pick Harry up. “You’re so big now!”

“It’s so cool that you’re here!” Harry said excitedly. “Uncle Moony has told me so many stories about you!” he said, making Sirius smile back at you. “What are you doing home?”

“Well, bud, I guess I just… missed you all so much” he said, kissing Harry’s head before putting him down.

“Do you want to see my broom? Aunt Bambi says it’s just like the one you and dad had, but she never lets me fly it-!”

“Hey, that’s not true” you complained.

“She won’t teach me Quidditch either-!”

“That’s because I don’t play Quidditch and neither does your Uncle Moony” you reminded him.

“But you said Uncle Padfoot played” he said, excitedly before turning back to Sirius. “Would you teach me?”

“Of course, I would” Sirius said, feeling his eyes water a little.

“Are you okay, Uncle Padfoot?” Harry asked a bit confused.

“Yeah, mate. I’m fine” he said, giving him another big hug. “I just… missed you so much” he said, with his voice breaking a little.

“Why don’t you go get your broom, love? I’m sure your uncle Padfoot would love to see it” you said, kissing his forehead.

“Yes! I will be right back!” he said excitedly, jumping up and down before he ran upstairs.

“You okay?” you asked, Sirius who was still looking Harry’s way.

“He just…” he said with a few tears rolling down his cheeks. “He looks so much like…”

“James, I know” you finished for him, pulling him closer. “He has Lily’s eyes though” you smiled.

“He does” Sirius said, kissing your temple. “I’m so sorry, love” he said, making you look at him a bit confused. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you” he said, cupping your cheek. “I-” he sighed. “How-” he stuttered. “I- um-”

“I’m okay” you smiled sweetly. “I mean, there are good days… and not-so-good days” you admitted. “I just miss him” you said with a few tears falling from your eyes. “And I hate that he and Lily aren’t here to see Harry” you said.

“I know, love” Sirius said, wiping away your tears and hugging you to him.

“Hey” you heard Remus walking down the stairs with someone in his arms. You pulled away from Sirius and walked over to them.

“Good morning, my love” you said, taking the toddler from Remus’ arms.

“Mummy” she smiled brightly at you as you kissed her cheek.

Sirius felt like his heart was going to explode. He had no idea how he could love you even more. Or how he could love someone at first sight. And there you were, holding the most beautiful girl he had ever seen in his entire life. She was the other way than Harry. She looked just like you, but she had his deep grey eyes.

“Sweetheart, I’d like you to meet someone” you told her as you walked back over to Sirius. “Sirius, this is Lyra” you said, as Sirius felt his entire heart melting when Lyra smiled shyly at him. “Can you say, hi, honey?” you asked as she waved her little hand at Sirius.

“H-hi” she said, resting her head on your shoulder.

“Hi, Lyra” Sirius said, as new tears rolled down his cheeks. “You are so beautiful” he smiled.

“Uncle Moony says I look like mum” she said.

“You do” Sirius nodded. “You’re just as beautiful as her” he smiled.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

“I made this for Uncle Padfoot, do you think he’ll like it?” Harry asked you, showing the new drawing of him with Sirius.

It had been a few weeks since Sirius was back and each day, both kids were getting more attached to him. He was basically Harry’s new favorite person, and you couldn’t blame him. Harry spent the entire day asking him questions about James, playing Quidditch, and Sirius basically doing whatever he wanted, and spoiling him with gifts.

And then, there was Lyra. at first, she was a bit shy but it wasn’t long before she started warming up to him. Every single time Sirius appeared in a room, you saw your daughter’s face lighting up just as much as his did. She followed him everywhere. She cried whenever Sirius had to leave again because he was still staying with Remus since he said he didn’t want to turn your life upside down or the kids’ lives for that matter by him being back.

And it was no secret that Sirius was instantly wrapped around Lyra’s little finger. You could tell he loved Harry as much as you did. He was practically becoming his best friend and he loved spending time with him. But Lyra had brought something out in Sirius that you had never seen before. Which is why, you wanted to ask him to move in with the three of you. Firstly, because he was practically living here already. He came in before the kids woke up and he left when they were tucked in. Mostly so Lyra wouldn’t cry when he left. But also because you had missed him so much, and now he was back. And you wanted him back. With you.

“I’m sure he’ll love it, sweetheart” you said, kissing Harry’s head as he and Lyra had breakfast on the kitchen counter.

“Are you going to marry Uncle Padfoot?” he suddenly asked, making you choke on the coffee you were drinking.

“W-what?”

“I asked Uncle Moony if you and Uncle Padfoot were married but he said no” he said, casually. “I think you two should be married” he shrugged.

“Why do you think that, love?” you asked, as you fed Lyra.

“Because you’re my godmother and he’s my godfather” he said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“W-well, I’ll… think about that” you smiled. “But… how would you guys feel if um- uncle Padfoot comes stay with us?”

“You mean live here?” Harry asked, excitedly.

“Yes” you nodded.

“With us?”

“Yes” you repeated.

“Where would he stay?” he asked, curiously.

“Um, well… he would stay with me” you explained.

“So, you are getting married?”

“I don’t know, Harry, I mean, I would have to ask him first” you chuckled.

“Uncle Moony said he asked you” he replied.

“What? Stop talking to your Uncle Moony!” you complained.

“Uncle Moony” Lyra repeated, smiling.

“Look, I will talk to Sirius today and I will ask him if he’d like to live with us” you explained. “So, I wanted to know what you guys think about it” you smiled.

“Really?”

“Yes, because we are a team. And you two are the most important people in my life” you said, poking each on their noses. “So… what do you think?”

“We love Uncle Padfoot!” Harry insisted. “Right, Lyra?”

“Yes!” she smiled, looking up at him.

“Okay, then. I guess I’m going to have to ask Uncle Padfoot” you smiled, nervously.

“Ask Uncle Padfoot what?” you heard Sirius walking in on the back door. “You monkeys are already up?” he said, messing Harry’s hair with his hand and picking up Lyra from her chair, kissing her cheek.

“Aunt Bambi wants to ask you to marry her so you can come live with us!” Harry said, excitedly.

“Harry!” you widened your eyes, feeling your cheeks burning instantly.

“W-what?” Sirius asked, looking at you.

“We want you to mawy mummy” Lyra repeated.

“Okay, that’s enough” you said, taking her from Sirius and placing her back on her seat. “Um, Sirius, could I see you in the other room for a moment?”

“Sure. Lead the way, Bambi” he smirked.

“Bambi” Lyra giggled.

“So, what’s this I hear about you wanting to marry me and move in with you?”

“Shut up, Black, and stop looking at me like that!”

“Oh, it’s Black now” he smirked. “I see you’re really riled up, Potter” he chuckled.

“Look, I just… wanted to ask you…” you started, avoiding his eyes. You knew he was enjoying this.

“Yes?”

“Well, I was thinking about the possibility of you… moving in with us?”

“That’s not what your kids said” he smiled.

“First of all, they’re your kids too” you glared at him. “And secondly, it’s only because Harry asked if we were going to get married” you explained.

“Really?”

“Yes, he thinks we should because you’re his godfather and I’m his godmother” you told him.

“Kid’s got a point” he said.

“Sirius! I’m not joking!”

“Neither am I” he said, dropping his smile and looking at you.

“What?”

“I don’t see why we shouldn’t get married” he shrugged. “I asked you before. You said yes” he reminded you.

“That was three years ago. A lot has changed since then-”

“Well, my feelings for you, haven’t” he clarified. “Have yours?”

“No, of course not!”

“I’m not saying we have to do it right away” he told you, smiling sweetly. “I’m just saying… if you’d ask… I’d say yes” he said.

“You think I’m going to ask you?”

“Why not? I asked you last time! It’s only fair, love!” he mocked you as you crossed your arms in front of your chest with a raised eyebrow. “You know, I forgot how cute you looked when you were mad” he said, pulling you closer. “I’m not going anywhere, love” he said, cupping your cheek with his hand. “You are the love of my life. You always have been. And you, Harry, and Lyra are the only thing that matters to me” he continued. “And Moony, if he asks” he said, making you chuckle. “Look, I’ve missed three years already and I don’t want to miss another second” he said, making you smile. “So, I will ask you, however you want me to, whenever you want me to, as many times as you’d like me to, my love” he said, wrapping his arms around your waist and you gave him a peck on the lips.

“I love you” you said, smiling.

“I love you too” he said, kissing you again. “You wanna go tell the kids?”

“Yeah, might as well” you said, kissing his cheek and pulling him towards the kitchen where the two of you saw Harry helping Lyra get down from her seat. Sirius felt you stop at the entrance and he grabbed your hand. He noticed the look on your face. In the past weeks, he noticed you getting that look whenever Harry was with Lyra.

“Harry’s a really good big brother” he said, kissing the side of your head.

“Yeah” you smiled. “He doesn’t just look like James” you said, resting your head on his shoulder.

“He’d be really proud of you, you know that, right? So, would Evans” he told you. “They picked right” he smiled.

“Yeah” you said, kissing his cheek. “They did” you told him. 

The End

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

A/N: I hope you loves liked it! and I hope this keeps rolling xD I have a few 9-1-1 imagines coming up, and also Stranger Things, and/or Remus, James hopefully!

tags: @twilightlover2007 , @hisparentsgallerryy

[cheapshrimpysheep]

Onesie Party

SUMMARY: Ace and Deuce, with a hint from Cater and financially support from Kalim, gave you a costume made Grim onesie. And decided to throw a surprise (to only you) onesie party at Ramshackle Dorm and invite all the students you knew. Onesies were the mandatory dress code!

CHARACTERS: All NRC Students. (Leona is mentioned because, let’s face it, he would only wear a onesie if he was forced to)

TAGS: Fluf; GN Reader.

WORD COUNT: 3.780

COMMENTS: I'm new at posting here on tumblr. This is the first thing I write as a fan of something. I already read other things like this here and I enjoyed them. One night I was wearing my own onesie and got this idea. I also like to write so, why not?

I hope you enjoy reading. I did enjoy writing it.

BTW: English isn't my first language.

You were on Ramshackle Dorm. It was already late night, and you were getting ready to go to bed when you decided to make one last check at your Magicam.

You had a massage from Cater. He sent to you a post. It was a photo of someone wearing a black cat onesie with red fire in its ears.

Cater: It reminded me of Gri-Chan

Cater: they're making custom onesie!!

Cater: a Grim onesie would be so adorbs!!!!!

Cater: and you'd look so cuuute on one ;)

That made you giggle. You checked the post just to confirm what you´ve already thought.

You: They’re sooo CUTE!!!

You: I would love to have a Grim onesie but…

You: they’re so expensive :(

You: That and Grim would probably tease me about it and his ego would inflate even more -.-

Cater: hahahahaha He would do that because he would love to see you in that too XD

Cater: but yah... it's a shame it's so expensive :(

Cater: Ow... I need to go... Don't want to lose my head to be up past hours

Cater: nighty night~

You: good night ~

Little did you know Cater would tell your two dummy best friends about the onesie thing.

It was a chilly night, some days after that chat, and the sun was just a few seconds of set, when you heard a knock on the front door.

Grim smelled the air. “I smell FOOD!” he said, rushing to the door.

You hear Ace and Deuce's voices. And then you see them appear in the lounge where you were sitting on the sofa. If you were drinking something, you would have spit it out or choked on your laughter.

Besides having some bags with snacks, they were also wearing onesies. Ace had an ace of hearts onesie and Deuce had a two of spades onesie. They say that line of onesies were made based on the Queen of Hearts card soldier.

Ace was loud when he greeted you. Deuce was probably still embarrassed about the situation.

“You look so adorbs!” You said, purposely imitating Cater, and laughing. That made Deuce blush a little.

“HA ha ha. I know right?” Ace said, “But don’t think can escape from join us.”

“I would love to, but unfortunately for you, I don't have a onesie.”

“Are you sure?” Ace took out one of the things Deuce carried in one of the bags.

“OI!” Deuce protested. And Ace threw you a paper bag. Like a package that arrived in the mail. When you picked it up, you realized that by the softness, inside the bag there should be some kind of clothing.

You opened the bag while they took the snacks out of the bags and placed them on the table. And unfurling a gray onesie with a trifurcated tail, blue fire coming out of the cat ears and a black and white striped bow around the neck, which the zipper handle being a pendant.

“Don't just stand there looking at it. Go dress it before the party starts!”

“Party?! What party?!”

Ace had a mischievous smirk on his face.

“Sorry, (Y/N).” Deuce said, “I wanted to tell you, but they wanted it to be a surprise.”

“They? You mean there more people than you two who are involved in this?”

“Of course.” Ace said, “That thing was expensive. Who do you think we tricked to… I mean, who do you think offered to pay for the whole thing when he knew about it?”

You looked at him with a raised eyebrow. And someone else nocked at the door. Either it was a huge coincidence or a great timing. You put the onesie on the sofa and went to open the door.

Kalim’s greeting was as warm as always. He was wearing a red parrot onesie. He had his signature smile, until he saw your clothes.

“Oh, did we come too soon? Ace and Deuce haven’t arrived yet? I hope I didn't ruin the surprise.”

“Oh no. They are here. I just haven't put on my onesie yet.”

He sighed with relief “I got scared for a second. Then go try it one! I can’t wait to see how it looks on you!”

You smiled “Ok, I’ll go. After you enter.”

Kalim wasn't carrying anything, but the person who came in after him and greeted you had about three boxes stacked in his arms. You controlled your laughter because you knew he wouldn't like that. But Jamil looked so cute in his dark red snake onesie. You felt the need to say something.

“Don't be mad at me, but you look kinda cute on that.”

“D-don’t worry. I’m not mad” and he quickly balanced the boxes on one arm to pull the hood up to cover his blushing face with the other. “Thanks.” He whispered. That just made it worse. He was now even cuter.

You went to one of the empty rooms to change to your new onesie. When you returned to the lounge all the boys ware looking at you the same way, but Kalim was the one saying what probably all of them were thinking.

“Aw! You look so cute (Y/N)!”

“Myahaha. Looks like we find the perfect uniform for my hench-human.”

And before you could say something back, another knocks the door. You were so excited about seeing another NRC student in a cute onesie than you almost rush to the door.

OMG. Now it was Trey and Cater on a three of clubs and four of diamonds onesies. They'll tell you that the four card soldier onesies pack was on discount, so they took it. And of course, Trey brought one of his cakes. Like Deuce, Trey was a little embarrassed. But Cater...

“OGS, you look cuter that I thought! I need a pic of us (Y/N)!”

(OGS = Oh Great Seven)

They entered and after them… surprise of surprises:

“Riddle?!” It was already too late to try to sound less cooked. And he was wearing a red hedgehog onesie. “I-I didn’t thought… um…”

“Think, (Y/N), I didn't think.” He corrected you. maybe because he would anyways, or maybe to try to soften the soft blush that was already starting to form. “Well, since you always go to our unbirthday parties when invited, and sometimes even help preparing them, I thought the minimum I could do to show my appreciation was to attend to one of your parties.”

After he entered, something on the back of the onesie caught your eye. You weren't looking at that, swear! But that little round tail was so cute.

A few minutes later, new knockings on the door.

“Kalim?” You asked, “How many people did you invite?”

“Well, to be honest, I was thinking about inviting all the students at school. But Jamil said that you could not like that especially because it was a surprise party, so he suggested only invited the people you know.”

You smiled at Jamil as saying thank you.

“So I only invited… um, let me see… Jamil, Riddle, Trey, Cater, Leona, Ruggie, Jack, Azul, Jade, Floyd, Vil, Rook, Epel…”

Another knock interrupted Kalim’s list. Whoever it was from that list, it was better to open the door and fast.

Ruggie was wearing a hyena onesie. You were as happy to see him as he was to see you but... “Isn’t it a little bit… weird for you?” You asked.

“Hey! I'm a very loyal guy to my roots. Shehe.”

“That and Leona-senpai said it was either that or a lion onesie.” Jack said. He will revel to you that Leona was the one paying for Ruggie's onesie. and he wanted to buy the lion one for Ruggie, just to mess with him, but eventually Ruggie convinced him to buy the hyena one. Jack himself was wearing a dark blue onesie with little stars and little moons that glowed in the dark, what made you look confused and with a lot of questions at him.

Jack blushed. “L-listen, it's a long story. It was the only thing I had. I bought this a couple of years ago because of my little sister. I can explain it later...”

You didn’t saw anyone else with them. “Oh, what a shame Leona couldn’t come.” You say to Ruggie with a smirk on your face. Despite you really wanting to see him in a cute onesie, you know he wouldn’t do such thing.

And speaking of him, if you’re questioning why Leona would buy Ruggie a onesie just for that party. They made a deal. And Ruggie’s part of the deal was sneakily snap some pictures of your pretty figure on that cute onesie for Leona. And maybe he would save some copies to himself too.

Them entered and you saw that Ruggie’s onesie covered his entire back. So, his little tail was inside. Unlike Jack's tail, which poked out of his onesie and struggled not to wag like a happy dog’s one.

After the two of them entered the lounge, Ace started messing with Jack, and Ruggie started messing with Riddle because of they’re onesies. Nothing to make neither of them too mad, but it made you star worrying about other possible gests.

Not long after, you open the door again.

“Awww... why an azarashi-chan onesie? You should have got a Shrimp one.” Floyd whined. “Ne Jade?”

“He Floyd.” His Twin agreed “Oh, but you still look adorable on that direbeast onesie.”  After Ruggie, it was no surprise seeing them on eels onesies. The funniest thing about their onesies was the feet getting out of the onesie while the tail continued a little further back.

But honestly, even more funny was Azul in front of them. Was he using an octopus onesie? Unfortunately for you, no. He was wearing a… business onesies! A onesie that looked like a suit. How did he even find one of those? You could have asked if you didn't just start laughing.

Azul looked a little upset about your laugh.

“I told you that one was stupid.” Floyd said. “You should have got a cute one.”

“I didn’t want a cute one.” Azul said back to Floyd, and then asked you: “Is there something wrong about the onesie I chose?”

“No, no.” You assured him, still giggling a little. “There’s nothing wrong with it. It’s just that I never saw a onesie liked that. I didn’t even know those existed.”

“I would rather see Azul on an octopus onesie myself as well.” Jade said with his signature smile that only the people who knew him knew it was a mocking smile.

“Absolutely not!” Azul reiterated. And as if trying to change the subject of the conversation. “Though, (Y/N), despite the preferences of my colleagues, I may say that you look wonderful in those clothes.” Oh, he tried to control the blush, but little did he know it was stronger than his wishes.

The Tweels smiled mischievously but didn’t say anything about it. Looking at them and thinking about the people that were already on the lounge, you realised something. You opened your arms in a signal for them not to enter yet.

“Wait, just… Can I please ask you something?” you opened your arms in a signal for them not to enter yet. But you quickly remember when you saw their, let's say, villainous smiles. You wanted a favor from the Fish Mafia, hum?

“Of course, prefect.” Azul said with his charming smile. “Anything you wish. You already should know that.”

There was only one thing you could use to your advantage when dealing with those three. And especially in this situation. They soften when their poor unfortunate souls are cute.

“Can you please not anger anyone? You know, teasing them about the onesies? I wanted everyone to enjoy the party.” You asked with only the necessary amount of puppy eyes.

“Anger anyone?” Floyd repeated, then smiled. “Is kingyo-chan here?”

Time to increase the puppy eyes, directed at both at Floyd and Azul. And while Azul was thinking you thought of a possible offer to Floyd. “I'll buy a shrimp onesie!”

Floyd’s smile softened and warmed. “Really~? And would you visit me with it dressed at Octavinelle whenever I ask you~?”

“Not whenever you ask.” You stood.

“And what if we set a maximum limit?” Jade said, as if that deal was of his interest as well. “Once a week maximum?”

“Once a month.”

“Twice a month” Floyd pouted.

“Fine. Twice a month maximum.”

“Okay~! What do you think Azul?”

“Um… Allow me to be the one selling the onesie to you, and we have a deal.”

You signed. “Fine.”

“It’s a deal then, my dear (Y/N). It’s always a pleasure to do them with you.”

If it makes you feel better, remember that you just made a dela with them while everyone wearing onesies. And little did Azul know he would be teased for his choice of onesie as well. At least Jamil had that to counterattack.

Next knocks on the door.

“Beauté! Oh, Trickster, your onesie is magnifique! Such clothing specially designed based on a close friend! What a wonderful show of beautiful bonds.” And Rook did it again, made you blush with his flourish. “Ah~” he whispered at you with a smile. “And of course, you could get even more beautiful.” He was wearing a light purple bear onesie.

“Rook, don’t spoil (Y/N) already with your complements.” Vil said. He was wearing a peacock onesie. He looked at you and smiled. “But I agree, it is a pretty cosy sight to behold. I even dare say you may look better than Grim himself.”

You smiled, still blushing. “Don’t say that in front of him.”

They entered and finally you see your fellow Pomefiore freshman. Epel was wearing a purple onesie with white lines with little drawings (like a Christmas onesie, but purple instead of red). But the biggest surprise was seeing him with his excited smile. You would think he from all people wouldn't like a party like this. I mean, it's kind of hard looking anything other than cute on a onesie. But he seems looking forward to the party.

“Ah! I love your onesie.” You tell him.

“Thanks! My grandma did it for me some time ago. I never had the opportunity to use it with other people wearing their own onesies too!”

“I also told him that he wouldn't need to worry about being the only one being called cute on this party.” Vil said.

“Oh! I'm eager to see what our dear schoolmates chose to wear on this night.”

“Um, Rook?” You ask before he continued followed the other two to the lounge.

“Oui?”

“I’m curious. Epel is wearing a onesie that his grandmother made. Vil is wearing, well, the animal that I most associated with him.” You giggle. “But I was wondering why you’ve chose a bear?”

He smiled at you. “I’m glad I picked your curiosity.” Rook had his, let’s say, hunter smile on his face. “Well, since you’re the host, I may tell you. You see, I always found fascinating by how a huge beast like a bear could turn into a soft and cute toy for children. Both an efficient predator and a fluffy friend. I thought it was a good fit for both the party and me. Wouldn't you agree, trickster?”

“Indeed.” you smiled, slightly worried.

Some minutes later, more knock on the door.

“HIII, prefect!” And you thought Ortho couldn't look cuter. He was wearing a magenta onesie with little horns, and with the ways he was moving you were able to glance a pointy tail behind him as well. He even changed his flames hair colour to match the onesie. “Wow! The Grim-san onesie is so cool! It looks so good on you.”

"Thank you. Your onesie is so cool too."

“Ha ha, thank you. They are from characters we really like. We thought it would be cool to matching clothes for this kind of party.”

“We? Matching?”

“And I’m already regretting that.” You heard a familiar deep voice saying somewhere outside.

“Ni-san! Come on, you said you wanted to show everyone how superior our onesies are.” Then he imitated Idia's voice. “There's no way those guys have better onesies than this. I personally upgraded mine from their standard self to accommodate my shut-in needs.”

“Fine, fine… you don't need to info-dump everything in one line of dialog.”

Instead of waiting for Idia to came out of his hiding place, you snick out your head to find him crouching to the wall close to the door.

“Heep! N-no need to jump-scare me.” He was wearing a onesie similar to Ortho’s, but his was teal, and the horns were longer than Ortho's. He was using the hoodie to hide his face, despite the long blue flames of hair that lit him. You could also see the pointy tail lying on the ground.

“Sorry.” Your eyes widened. “Your onesies are so cool! And the fact they’re matching is so adorable.”

Idia looked up at you, saw your cat ears with flames that match his own hair, and the ends of that same hair began to turn pink.

“(Y/N), could you help me convince my brother to enter the party. Please.” The please wasn't needed, he was asking you with his cute little brother's voice, and you existed heart couldn’t say no to that. That and you also wanted Idia in the party.

“Um… If I tell you some of the onesies others are wearing, would you feel more comfortable?”

“That could be considered a spoiler but… yah… If the game offers you some hint about the element of your opponent’s attacks, you’re a noob for not taking advantage of that.” And with it he at least got up. Making you be the one looking up.

“Let me see… Ace, Deuce, Trey and Cater are matching to. They’re card soldiers.”

“Um… I think I saw the pack online…”

“Riddle is a red hedgehog.”

“WHA-? Riddle-shi is here?! And on a hedgehog onesie?!”

“Right? I was as chocked as you.”

“Well, from the small sample my theory still holds.” Idia whispered with a smug smile.

“So, will you enter with me Ni-san?”

“Y-yes. I-I can go with you.”

Ortho happily thanked you and tugged his big brother by his onesie sleeve. After they entered you could see in both onesies a little pair of demon wings.

You were still waiting for someone else. But it seemed to be taking longer than the others.

“Kalim. Please tell me that you didn’t forget to invite de guys from Diasomnia.”

“I could swear I invited everyone… AH! That's what I forgot to tell Lilia in music club meeting!”

“What?! You didn’t invite them?!”

“Don’t warry, (Y/N).” Jamil said to you. “I made sure to go to the music club room after their meeting was over and I came across Lilia on the corridor. I can assure you that I informed him of the party.”

You could hug and kiss this boy right there and then and it shown on your eyes. “Oh Jamil, you’re the best!” he said it was nothing as he hid his face in his onesie's hoodie.

Despite that, you were only relieved when you finally heard another knock on the door. You open it with an expectant smile on your face and...

Nobody?

“Goodnight, (Y/N).”

“Aaaahh! Lilia!” you scold.

Lilia just did one of his popped out of nowhere upside-down things. This time appearing on the top of your door trim.

“Fuhuhu. Forgive me, but I couldn’t resist.” He said as he turned to land his feet on the floor. He was wearing a black dragon onesie, with fluffy horns and tail and a purple belly.

You looked at him, he looked at you.

“You look so cute!” you both said to each other at the same time. And while you were laugh it off, three tallest figures appeared behind Lilia.

They were all wearing the same black dragon onesies. The only exception was that Malleus' onesie didn't have the fluffy horns. Instead, there were holes on the hoodie specially made for his real horns take the place of the fake ones. He had his charming, delighted smile on. The smile he always has when he's invited for something.

“Indeed, that is certainly a flattering attire. Especially on you, Child of Man.”

“Thank you.” You smiled and blush. “Come on in! I want to see your onesies better.”

“HA!” Sebek yelled. “A human capable of understand the grandiosity of waka-sama to be willing to admire his figure in such admirable garment.” He was probably calling the onesie admirable because it was design based on the dragon form of the Thorn Fairy.

This also made a sleeping Silver standing next to Malleus wake up. He sighed. “I knew this onesie was too comfortable.” He was the last one entering the hall.

It was funny seeing Sebek so proud for using a dragon’s onesie alongside his Waka-sama. Seeing sleepy Silver on that onesie was one of the cutest sights of the night. But you also felt sorry for him because he was struggling more than usual to stay awake.

And Malleus, the warm way he was looking at you on your Grim onesie plus how cute he was on his, you suddenly felt like hugging him. He would probably like it. Sebek wouldn't.

You told them they could join the others on the lounge, and they started walking there. But you saw Malleus staying behind with you, and with a little help from Lilia, the other two didn't realise it. The moment they walked in the lounge you heard Sebek starting an argument with Ace about their onesies.

“Is something wrong, Tsunotarou?”

“Do you remember me giving you permission to touch my horns?”

“Yes.” And you already did it once or twice.

“I know they are part of your suit, but would you allow me to touch your ears?”

It took you a moment to finally answer with a wanna-be smug smile. “You can touch them, if you're willing to suffer the consequences for the audacity.” And you even dared to try to strike one of Malleus' powerful poses.

“Ha ha ha ha.” You successfully made him give you one of his genuine laughs. “Fine then. I have never been one to cowered over anything.” He got closer to you, reached out his hands and started petting your cat ears.

And while he was entertained by that, you hugged him. He widened his eyes looking down at you on his chest.

“The consequences.” You told him. What made him giggled and return the hug.

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

[mlmxreader]

Brat | Alfie Solomons x nb!reader

『••✎••』

↳ ❝ “Don’t be a brat” +“Make. Me” + Teasing (this seems like an Alfie and feisty pairing prompt to me xD but whatever you want) ❞

: ̗̀➛ Alfie's staying up all night working and you're frustrated and annoyed by it, but there's only one way you can think of to properly pull him away from it.

trigger warnings : ̗̀➛ swearing, smoking, anal fingering, anal sex, praise kink, breeding, spanking, teasing, edging (brief), sex without lube, cockdrunk, drool/spit

↳ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

↳ (1) Feisty, (2) Acceptance, (3) I Want You To Stay

•───────────────★•♛•★──────────────•

Planted firmly on Alfie's windowsill, you lit up a cigarette as you scowled at him; he had spent all day working, and now that it was trickling into the early hours of the morning, you could only glare at him. You regretted agreeing to staying up with him to keep him awake. He was fucking intolerable. Grumpy and snappy.

He was lucky you tolerated him so much and threw him a few puzzles from the newspapers as the lights flickered from being overused.

You were growing bored, though, and flicking your cigarette ends out of the window was starting to give you an idea; aiming carefully, you lined it up perfectly with his forehead before you sent it flying.

He snapped to look at you, narrowing his eyes. "What the fuck was that?"

You shrugged, raising your brows slightly. "Huh?"

"Don't," he said lowly. "Don't fuckin' start this shit with me now, sunshine, I ain't in the fuckin' mood for it."

You pursed your lips slightly, shaking your head. "Not sure what you mean, Solomons."

He rolled his eyes. You still wouldn't call him Alfie. You only did that when you were upset, and even then, it was Alfred; Alfie was when you were livid at him and couldn't stand the sight of him. He had grown used to it, and even liked it when you called him by his last name. It kept him smiling when he didn't want to.

"Don't do it again."

You waited for a few minutes, then picked one out of the nearby ashtray; again, you managed to get it to smack him right on the forehead.

"Oi!"

"What?" You hummed innocently. "You do it to me all the time!"

Alfie scoffed. Another few minutes passed, and you grew bold; you pulled his chair back, planting yourself on his lap with your hands on his shoulders.

"Stop fucking working."

He rolled his eyes, trying not to smile. "Can't do that, treacle. Papers gotta be done by tomorrow and shipped out by the afternoon."

"Stop," you demanded.

"You're in no position to make demands," Alfie hummed, letting his hand rest just above your ass. "You're the one beggin' for my attention."

"I'm not," you huffed. "I'd sooner shit in my hands and clap."

He finally caved, grinning. "So, if I did this, you wouldn't care?"

He slipped his hand under your trousers, grabbing your ass; he felt your hips jerk in response, your fingers digging into his shoulders.

"No," you managed to say. "I wouldn't give a shit."

"Don't be a brat," he whispered, ghosting his mouth against yours. "Say what you want, treacle."

A shaky breath left your lips, blowing against his as you swallowed thickly. "I'm not stroking your fucking ego."

Alfie hummed, his grip on your ass getting slightly tighter. "C'mon. I promise I'll stop workin' if you do. You just gotta speak to me."

You held steady, letting out a long sigh as you adjusted your hips on his lap. "Make. Me."

"Alright," he mused, moving his hand and circling the tip of his finger around your ass hole. He heard you whisper to keep going, so he slipped one finger into you; slowly pumping it in and out as you bucked your hips against him. You let out a soft whimper, rubbing against him to try and get any friction that you could.

"You gonna speak and tell me what you want?" He asked lowly.

You shook your head. "You're gonna have to do a lot fucking better than that. Not even two fingers could make me say anything to you."

"Challenge accepted," he grinned, slipping another finger in.

Slowly, he pumped them in and out before moving them in a scissor motion; you trembled a little, gritting your teeth and practically humping him as you moved with the rhythm of his fingers.

"You're gonna- gonna have to do better," you growled out. "I reckon three wouldn't do anything either."

Alfie laughed lowly, slipping the third in and stretching you as much as he could as he picked up the pace; quickly, he pistoned his fingers in and out of your ass, moving you so that he could get a better angle.

Your chest was against his shoulder as he pulled your trousers and underwear down, spanking your ass with his free hand as you egged him on and told him to keep going.

But suddenly, Alfie stopped. Leaving you feeling empty and needy as he leaned back in his chair and hummed innocently.

"Ain't so fun, issit?"

You growled in frustration, getting off of his lap and stripping down; you threw your clothes on the floor, and started to touch yourself in front of him. Alfie clenched his jaw, swallowing thickly as he focused on the movement of your hand.

He couldn't help it, dropping his hand under his trousers and stroking his cock; coating his hand in his own precum as he glared and scowled at you. He pushed his trousers down to his ankles.

"You ain't getting anywhere, Solomons," you growled out. "I can finish myself off if you won't."

"I fuckin' well will," he grunted out, waiting for you to get cocky enough to move closer. He grabbed you pulling you onto his lap so you could feel how fucking hard he was. "You ready?"

"I wanna see you try," you challenged, holding your cheeks spread so he had easier access.

He lowered you down onto his cock, bottoming out and moaning loudly; he didn't waist any time, thrusting up into you as quickly as he could as you gripped his shoulders and gasped his name loudly. He grinned.

"You gonna talk?"

You shook your head, kissing him harshly. "Nope. You're just gonna have to keep going."

He growled under his breath, grabbing your hips so he could fuck you harder; the sound of skin slapping skin filling the office as he kept going. He could feel your drool leaking onto his shoulder as you panted and tried your best to keep up with him; so easily cockdrunk, he wanted to laugh.

A quiet whimper of his name and "Don't stop" came from the back of your throat; so fucking desperate that there were tears in your eyes. You tried to fuck yourself on his cock, but Alfie was pounding into you too quickly. You were shaking as you clung onto him, desperate and needy.

You felt so good though, you didn't want it to end; you wanted him to cum in your ass, you wanted to feel it and to have it fill you until it leaked out slowly, only for him to fuck it back into you. Fuck, just the thought of it was making you so fucking weak you could hardly stand it.

Alfie growled out your name, holding you as close to his body as he possibly could; he wanted you to cum on him, wanted to taste it when he scooped it up on his fingers and licked them clean. He needed it, more than anything.

He picked up his pace, practically using you as a sex toy as he grunted out your name and pushed you back enough to look at your face; he grinned at the sight.

You leaned into his touch, your tongue hanging out of your mouth as your face grew hot to the touch. He leaned forward, running his tongue up yours before capturing you in a harsh and deep kiss.

He wanted to cum just from you moaning into his mouth like that.

He was hitting all the right fucking spots, which only made things worse.

"Oh, treacle," he chuckled softly. "You look so fuckin' good right now, it's a shame I ain't got a mirror."

You gripped his shirt, sweaty palms leaving stains on the nice light fabric. "Solomons... wanna... wanna cum... I'm gonna... gonna fucking kick your teeth in... if you don't... don't let me..."

"Aww," he cooed, smacking your ass as he smiled. "Ain't you just a fuckin' perfect little ball of feisty sunshine?"

He continued to fuck you as hard and fast as he could, trying not to smile when your ass clenched around him; your breath hot and shallow, sweat dripping from your arms and neck and face.

Your tongue lolling out of your mouth with a thin line of drool starting to pour. You squirmed and bucked your hips, you didn't care anymore. Desperate to cum.

But when Alfie finally came inside you, he didn't stop; fucking it into you until it started to dribble out a little as you moaned loudly.

He kept grunting your name, little praises as he told you he would fill you; you agreed eagerly, begging quietly for it as you came completely undone before him.

Your eyes rolled into the back of your head, just short of howling his name as you collapsed against him, burying your face against his neck as you caught your breath. Alfie stilled, giving your ass a soft slap.

"You alright?"

You nodded, daring to press a gentle kiss to the sweaty skin. "Don't go back to working."

"Hmm," he ran his hand up and down your back. "We'll see, sunshine, can't promise much... unless..."

"Unless?"

"You wanna go for round two," he mused with a shrug.

You smiled against his skin, grinding against him. "I'd sooner shit in my hands and clap."

"Is that a yes?" He hummed.

"Make me say it."

༺═──────────────────────────────═༻

thank you so much for reading! if I could just borrow another moment of your time, I'd like to draw your attention to Shahad; Shahad is a Palestinian in Gaza and, along with her family, is desperate for donations so that they can continue to survive during the genocide. if you could donate just £1, then that would mean so, so much to this family who are truly desperate for any means to continue living. please, consider donating.

[alexa-fika]

The Tale of Cats and Birds (Zoro x gn!Reader)

A/N: I really went back and forth with this one, I almost dropped it but I kept going and I think I COOKED, here is my first platonic!reader x character!

Dividers by @/saradika

“Again? Nami, you are definitely setting this pair buddy things up; how is it that I have been Zoro’s partner every single time we draw straws?” Reader sighs holding up the straw with the matching number said man was holding.

"Well, can you blame us? Zoro can’t find his way even if he is stuck in a straight line! So you are the perfect buddy system!”

“First of all, “us,” so all of you were in on it? Second of all, you have been pairing me with him all this time because of my homing instinct?!” They exclaim, their feathers ruffling up

“Yeah. We think he needs a buddy partner to navigate while he does the heavy lifting. I mean, just look at you and him! You two work like a well-oiled machine.” Nami explains.

“Im part Dove, not part compass,” they sigh

“Come on! You were born to be his buddy partner. If we didn’t put you two together, everyone would see just how incompetent he really is,” Sanji chimes in.

“Watch it, Curly eyebrows,” Zoro sneers

“Sure, Mr. Lost,” Sanji scoffs

“Shut up!”

“Okay! Okay! I think it’s time we head out! Off we go, Zoro!” reader quickly said, stepping in between them to dissolve the fight

“Hmph,” Zoro mutters. He then looks at you and rolls his eyes. It’s clear he is still ticked off, but he follows you down the ship’s gangway anyway.

They sighed, relieved that they had managed to avoid yet another fight between the two

As the two of you walk, you notice Zoro glaring at the clouds, his eyebrows furrowed together. He then lets out a deep sigh and grumbles to himself.

“You want to go take a nap? I saw a pretty tree close by.”

Zoro snorts.

“That sounds like a good idea…”

They grin

“You are like a cat, even got yourselves sharp claws like one,” they said, pointing at their swords

“You’re grumpy like one too.”

“Shut up…” Zoro grumbles, but he is unable to hide his slight blush at the thought. He follows you over to the tree and then sits down, resting his head against the trunk. The grass beneath him is soft and welcoming.

“You’re not denying it, though.” They giggle, fluttering to a branch above them and settling down, lying face down so they are able to stretch their wings and talk to the man below them

Zoro remains silent, unwilling to admit he sees a little truth in their words. He leans back against the tree, closing his eyes to enjoy the peace. The birds flying past him chirp happily, the sun warms his skin, and the soft grass underneath him is comforting. After a few minutes of relaxing, Zoro finally lets out a deep sigh.

“Oi, bird, catch.”

“Hmm?” They squeak as Zoro throws a small bag their way, scrambling to catch it and flapping their wings to maintain their balance on the branch they laid on.

Zoro chuckles as you hurry to catch the bag. Once you catch it, you unravel it and find it’s filled with sunflower seeds.

“You got me my favorite?!” They cheer

“Yeah, yeah, don’t get your feathers fluffed,” he replies, though he can’t entirely hide his amusement.

“Zoro… you really are like a cat. You act grumpy, but you’re really a softy, aren’t you?”

He grunts, but he can’t really disguise the redness on his cheeks.

“Yeah yeah, just eat your damn seeds…” he mumbles.

They grin, plopping a few in their mouth

“Thank you, Zoro.”

I have wanted to experiment with different hybrid readers or reader of different species, listen guys I did a roulette I swear I din’t mean for all of my current hybrid!readers to be birds XD.

Taglist

@imaginarydreams

[hangeslefteye]

Getting held by the armored titan

A short drabble where Reiner holds the annoying reader <3

***

''Reiner!''you yelled and ran to the corner of the roof you were standing.

For a couple of days now you were insisting him to hold you in his titan form.You knew how he felt about his titan so you thought this could help him to see his titan something other than just a death machine.Yet he refused you countless of times before he gave up and agreed.

You looked at the brute before your eyes.You had to admit how scary it looked with his armored muscles and shining golden eyes but knowing who was in the control of this giant only brought peace to you.

Armored titan walked close to the house you were standing on the roof of.He brought his palms together and looked at it for a moment as if he hesistated to lay it to you.

''Reiner bring your hands closer!''you yelled again.His titan didn't have the ability to speak so he nodded before he did as he was told.He brought his two huge hands to your reach.You didn't lose time to climb onto it.İt was suprising how tough it's exterior was yet inside of it was squishy like pillows.

You sat on his huge hands comfortably.He looked at you in his palms for a moment before he pulled his hands off roof and closer to his face.

''Aaaah Rei you are comfortable, you know baby?'' you said shamelessly and threw yourself completely onto your back to lay with your hands behind your head.His face was so close to yours so you couldn't resist the urge to pet his nose lovingly.

''Your titan is almost as handsome as you too!''you said playfully as you kept petting him.You were eager to tease him today since he couldn't speak.

As a sign of your victory, he unclenched his jaw to relase some built up steam.''Why are you getting hot for?''you said and laughed whole heartedly.But then the armored titan opened his mouth completely and brought you close to his mouth.''Oi oi oi,Reiner no,you can't eat me!''you screamed and got up to get out of his grasp.

Then you saw his huge wet tongue as it came to your direction.And he licked you.

He dragged his tongue all over your hair to your upper body.Unable to understand the situation you gave a high pitched ''EWW'' but that seemed to amuse the giant and he made a deep grunting sound.You understood this is how titans laughed.You tapped his armored mouth to say ''Reiner you are disgusting'' but he made an another grunting sound which made his golden eyes shine.

Despite the titan saliva on your hair you sighed happily.You were ready to do anything to see him having fun and being light hearted like this.

***

I go to asylum when?? xD Also I can make a taglist for those who want.I got one (1) person for now :D @roseofdarknessblog

I think I'll do it for other shifters too stay in tune if you liked <3 (Porco and Pieck inc)

[zorosjuicymelonsx]

Finding You

A/N: Hey guys, I'm back with another chapter :D

I plan to post the chapters out minimum once a week but since I had this ready I thought why not XD

Chapter Two Previous Next

The silence surrounding the crew sat in an ever growing bubble of dense shock and suspense. No one could fathom the news, it was too hard to digest for anyone including the swordsman in question. However, after a few still moments, the bubble popped and unanimous deep breaths were taken before the shouts of shock were released. 

“WHAT??”

You looked over to see Luffy laughing, the majority of the crew's jaws were still dropped practically to the floor including a skeleton fellow you weren’t sure was real or not. As for Sanji, taking the news to the core of his soul, he dropped to his knees going through the five stages of grief. 

“HUSBAND??” Sanji screamed, crumbling further into the floor trying to figure out how the marimo had a wife before him. 

“I am not your husband lady, I don’t even know who you are.” Zoro stated, you turned your head back to him, hurt evident on your face. You let go of the swordsman and made your way to your backpack, opening it and pulling out a document. You made your way back to Zoro and lifted the paper in front of him. 

“You are too, this is our marriage certificate you signed a few years ago. See?” Zoro suspiciously eyed you before hesitantly taking the document from you. He read over it, seeing the signatures at the bottom and recognising his own. He sighed, looking back up at you with doubt etched on his face.

“How do I know you didn’t forge this?” Zoro questioned, you scoffed and laughed out loud at the accusation as you crossed your arms over your chest. 

“Do you really think I would go through all this effort for one man just to forge this?” You questioned back. As he was about to defend his point, Nami had heard enough and decided to take matters into her own hands. 

“Hi I’m Nami, would you mind if I take a look at this? I’m pretty sure I can authenticate this.” Nami offered, you smiled and nodded as you took the document from Zoro and handed it to her. A quiet thank you from Nami was the last thing heard for a few minutes as she examined the document, looking over for any forgeries. 

“This…this is real Zoro.” Nami sighed as she confirmed, you smiled as you looked back at Zoro who was looking at Nami concerned before taking the document back from her to look over it more. 

“Oi Zoro, how do you not know your own wife? Did you get lost and forget?” Usopp jokingly laughed out, the others now gathered around Zoro to look at the marriage certificate. 

“I can even see this has a stamp from Shimotsuki village at the top.” Robin added, curiosity built in her by what the story could be behind you two.

“Bro congratulations, that's SUPER cool! The first one of us to get hitched.” Franky said, his hand landed on Zoro's shoulder and gave a friendly squeeze as the others now started to congratulate as well seeing the blush bloom on the swordsman's face. The crew decided to start introducing themselves one by one. 

You smiled at them all and attentively listened to each of the members, content that Zoro had made great friends. However nothing had prepared you for Luffy’s interesting personality as you noticed at the corner of your eye, the hole in the floor was still open but now occupied Luffy's head stretching out into the hole. You turned to gape at him, the crew turned to look at the captain but were unphased by his actions turning back to you.

“Wow this feels weird hahah, did you leave any food behind in here Y/N?” Luffy's voice echoed through the hole, Nami rolled her eyes and walked up to Luffy to pull his neck and get his head out of the hole. Nami gave a stern ‘behave’ look at Luffy but he just shrugged and laughed.

“Oops, forgot about that. I should really close that now.” You made your way over to the hole, reaching your hand out and a small white light came out of your palm. The hole had started to shrink out of existence, the crew in awe as they watched you close the hole and the floor of their ship returned to normal. Zoro would never admit that he was impressed. 

“That was AWESOME! How did you do that?!” Luffy asked, you were flattered at the compliment and began to giggle. 

“I ate the Tele-Tele no mi fruit which allows me to travel around the world through the holes I create”.

“Oh it's like that Branch lady who could travel through mirrors.” Luffy awed out, you politely nodded, not familiar with that particular devil fruit. 

“I’ve spent almost two years looking for Zoro, it was hard to find him but I’m here now.” You lovingly looked back at Zoro. Zoro merely rolled his eye at you at your confession.

“Do you want to join our crew?” Luffy put the invitation out there, your eyes widened and nodded excitedly at the offer. Zoro froze and finally stepped forward to stand next to you as he had enough. 

“Luffy, there is no way your letting her on-” 

“She's your wife, she's one of us by default and her ability is super cool. Can you take people with you through these holes?” Luffy questioned, clearly first in line to try this out of the crew. 

“I can take people with me but the disadvantage of my ability is it takes a lot of energy out of me so I limit its use to once a day. I’d be happy to use it with you sometime if you like Luffy?” You clarified, Luffy nodded and elongated his arms to wrap his arms around you in a hug. You didn’t question why his arms stretched out like rubber, deciding later would be best to ask about it. 

“We got ourselves a new crew member, guys let's have a party to celebrate Y/N.” Luffy announced, the crew cheered to the announcement. 

“I’ll make arrangements to have a room setup for the couple, I’ll make it SUPER cosy.” Franky announced, making his way to his workshop to get started. Zoro choked on nothing, about to protest but couldn’t find his voice. He couldn’t take much more of this and decided to walk away from everyone. 

“Franky, could you also make Y/N her own bed to have put in the girls room please incase Zoro messes things up with her.” Nami asked, Franky lifting his hand up to show a thumbs up and disappeared downstairs. 

The crew began to disperse, you turned around to find Zoro again only to see he’s disappeared. Your heart ached and you really couldn’t figure out why he had forgotten you already. 

'Maybe father was right..maybe he didn’t want me anymore.' 

“Finally another woman on this ship. Y/N, let's get you set up with us in the girls dorm and freshen up, you must be tired from your journey.” Nami wrapped her arm around yours, Robin taking your backpack from the floor as you three walked towards the dorm. However, Nami abruptly stopped and turned her head to Sanji. 

“Sanji…if you don’t knock it off right now, I’m going to beat the crap out of you.” Nami threatened the cook, you were taken aback at the sudden switch. Nami turned to smile at you sweetly before taking you to the dorm. You smiled back, making a mental note never to get on Nami’s bad side. Reluctantly, Sanji stood up, sticking his hands in his pockets as he muttered curses at Zoro, making his way to the kitchen to start preparing for the party.

————————————- ⚔️✨ ———————————————

As the evening twilight set, the Straw Hats were gathering for one of their famous parties. The deck was set up with fairy lights, tables of sides and other snacks Sanji had lovingly prepared and an abundance of booze and other drinks. Lawn chairs were placed around a BBQ pit in a bonfire-like setting. Sanji had Franky manning the grill of meats sizzling away whilst he glazed the meat with his top-secret sauce. At the same time he was brushing the sauce, he kept his left leg propped on Luffy's chest to keep him away, he could swear he felt his captain's drool roll down his ankle.

You walked out onto the deck with Nami and Robin by your side, you were dressed in a comfortable pink sundress Robin had kindly lent you that elegantly flowed and hugged you in all the right ways. Your hair styled down and light makeup painted your face. You were nervous, you didn’t do great with being in the spotlight but you were grateful you had Nami and Robin on your side. In the few hours you spent resting and getting ready with them, they made you feel like you had known them your whole life. 

You gazed around in awe at the party setup and could see everyone was there except for Zoro. Robin noticed your change in demeanor, taking your hand in hers to gently squeeze it with reassurance.  

“Don’t take it personally, our swordsman has a hard time dealing with his emotions.” Robin whispered quietly into your ear. You nodded, knowing Zoro was not the most expressive but couldn’t help but feel guilty considering how he reacted to you earlier. You hadn’t expected the reunion to turn out like this. 

“Y/N, let's sit over here.” Nami pointed at the chairs in the corner, you smiled at her and walked over where all three of you had now officially sat and joined the others. To your right, you had Nami, Luffy, Jinbe, Chopper and Brook. To your left, Robin, Usopp and a few empty chairs that you guessed were for Sanji, Franky and Zoro. As you sat in your chair, Sanji turned away from the BBQ to kneel in front of you, picking up your hand in the process. 

“Y/N, I would like to apologise for my behaviour earlier. No lady as lovely as you should have had to witness that.” Sanji said to you as he kissed the top of your hand, you could hear guilt laced in his voice.

“Don’t worry about it Sanji, you must be very close to Zoro. Anyone would react that way if their best friend held information like this from them.” You smiled. Hearing your words, Sanji's right eye had almost popped out of its socket, his forehead vein bulged out, sputtering incomprehensible words while the others roared in laughter. You gave a nervous laugh, gently taking your hand back and looking around at everyone confused by why they were laughing at him. 

“Best friends?? You’re hilarious Y/N.” Usopp managed to say out loud as he laughed, holding his stomach to try and control himself from falling off his chair.

“Am I missing something Nami?” You quietly asked as you looked over to her. 

“I’ll explain later.” She promised, still giggling as she got up to grab herself something to drink. Luffy seeing Nami move made him give up on his conquest for uncooked meat as he sprung from his spot to the food on the table. Silently swearing, Sanji put his marinade brush down and chased after him to make sure he didn’t eat everything. The others all began to move and mingle amongst themselves, you were too comfortable to move from your seat. 

The evening continued and thrived with music, joy and laughter. You were able to get to know your new crew members a lot more, taking in how different in character they were yet meshed so well together. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d felt this happy and comfortable. The food was out of this world, you made sure to pay your compliments to Sanji who ended up a blushing mess, blood gushing out of his nose and Chopper rushing to his aid. The concern you had over the cook quickly left you when the others assured you this is a normal occurrence for him.

“Pft, how pathetic.” A familiar voice joined, you looked up from the bleeding cook and panicking doctor over to Zoro who had sat in the chair meant for him. You couldn’t help your heart racing hearing his deep voice, your ears twinged red from embarrassment that you couldn’t control your excitement over seeing your husband. 

You smiled at his arrival, realising he hadn’t had anything to eat or drink since earlier today. You stood and walked over to where the food was on the table, feeling Zoro’s intense stare on your back. You made him a plate with the things you knew he would like, grabbed a bottle of sake and made your way over to him. You were now standing in front of him, offering the plate and drink to him. You heard a few quiet awes in the background. 

He looked at you, then looked at what you brought over. He stood up, pushed past you and made his way over to the table to grab himself a bottle of sake. Your smile dropped, you looked down at the floor of the deck and decided to return back to your seat leaving the plate and bottle to the side of your chair. You would never know that the plate of food disappeared a few seconds after by the captain who happily munched away at it. No food waste was allowed on the ship but you would learn that soon enough. 

No one knew what to say, you sat in your own mind wondering why he had become so cold towards you. You decided you couldn’t take it anymore for today, you thanked everyone for the party and walked away to the girls dorm to sleep for the night. After you left, angry eyes moved to look at Zoro who seemed to be nonchalant over his own behaviour. 

“You’re being an asshole right now, what's wrong with you?” Nami stood from her chair in annoyance, pointing at Zoro.

“I didn’t ask her to do anything for me, I don’t know why you guys are gushing all over a complete stranger.” 

“This isn’t how you treat someone who went through so much to find you.” Nami walked over to now stand in front of Zoro with her hands on her hips. 

“I never asked her to look for me, I don’t even know who she is or why I agreed to marry her. We are clearly nothing alike, I mean look at her; she's all delicate and shit. How is she going to defend herself if we get attacked by pirates or marines? She's just another head to count for.” Zoro bluntly said, going back to his sake to take a swig.

“Marimo, the fact Y/N even married you is a miracle in itself. I’ve spent all afternoon thinking how she could even consider a brute like you, especially how you’re talking about her.” Sanji angrily voiced, bringing a cigarette to his mouth and lighting it. 

“Stay out of this perverted cook.” Zoro bit back.

“Make me shit head.” 

“That's enough. Clearly, something happened to Zoro’s memory. We confirmed your marriage certificate is legit. Why are you so against this?” Nami questioned, Zoro rolled his eye over remembering that stupid piece of paper. 

“Because now I have to do all this husband crap and it's just going to take up precious time I can be using to train. Can’t I just divorce her?” Zoro said, a wave of gasps and disapproving looks from everyone daunted over him. 

“That's going too far now, Zoro-san.” Brook voiced. 

“Y/N is so kind, how can you say that?” Chopper sadly spoke.

“Maybe if I kick him in the head hard enough, he’ll remember.” Sanji threatened. 

“Swordsman, if you mind me offering you some advice. I think you should get to know Y/N again. She clearly cares for you, we can train her up to make sure she can defend herself against attacks and maybe you’ll be able to recover the lost part of your memory.” Robin piped in, Zoro looked at her and couldn’t find fault in her advice. 

“Let's say for argument's sake something did happen to my memory, that I did love Y/N once upon a time. What if I can’t recover it? I have no interest in romance, it would be cruel to give her false hope that I could love her the way she wants me to.” 

“I could try to develop a medicine that could help to uncloud that part of your memory so we can see what happened.” Chopper chimed in, excited at the prospect of conducting new medical research. 

“Never say never to romance Zoro-bro, you may surprise yourself. She’s a beauty.” Franky winked confidently at Zoro, the others hummed in agreement. Zoro grunted, hating himself that he couldn’t deny you were very attractive on the eyes.

“I’m leaving, this is ridiculous.” Zoro stood up, grabbing his sake and walked away to the Crows Nest to start his night watch shift, irritated by the hopefulness of his crew. He felt nothing for you all the while rethinking the same question he had to himself over and over again;

“Why can’t I remember you?” ————————————-⚔️✨————————————

A/N: I hope you guys liked this chapter :3 I'm planning at some point to review the layouts on my tumblr posts to make it look prettier.

Now with the Tele-Tele no mi devil fruit, I genuinely believed I made this up until I researched and saw its an actual devil fruit in One Piece. However, the description/imagination of it was completely from my own head. I'll be back next week with the next chapter!

[giggly-squiggily]

Hi! How are you doing? THANK YOU for opening your requests, your writing is so fricking good! I have two fic requests in mind (you can choose one if you're doing one request per person :3).

platonic Lee! Sigma Ler! Dazai (BSD.). Plot: Sigma is 'air ticklish' and cannot deal with any form of anticipation without becoming a giggly mess and Dazai is a teasing jerk who takes advantage of this. That's it, that's the request XD.

platonic OR romantic Lee! Dazai Ler! Kunikida (BSD.) Plot: Dazai is ticklish but Kunikida is not. So, Kunikida finally has something to hold over Dazai's head and thus can get him back for annoying him. Little did he know, Dazai's ticklish laugh is different (read: CUTER) than his regular laugh and Kunikida accidently makes a comment about it out loud. That comment is now something Dazai can hold over Kunikida's head!

I'm not too sure how far you are in BSD, so feel free to ignore my requests if you don't feel comfortable writing it. Have a nice day and stay safe!

EKJEKJRJKE WAA! Thank you so much, anon! I appreciate the kind words! So- unfortunately I don't know Sigma yet, so I can't do that one; but I can do the Dazai and Kunikida fic! :D It's such a cute plot and I freaking love it akjejrkaejkrjaejrk I hope you like it!

Cloud 9 (Taglist peeps):

@thatbigbisexual29 @dirtpie39 @duckymcdoorknob @cupcake-spice13 @t-wordiiish @rachi-roo

“Oi.” A finger tasered his side, making Dazai shoot up in his seat with a yelp. “Stay focused.”

“I am! I am focused- I just…” Dazai huffed some upon meeting Kunikida’s eyes, turning back to his desk with a small pout. “I’m so boooored~ It’s all paperwork! And you won’t let me have my headphones-”

“Cause you spend the entire day dancing around the office and singing.”

“Hey- I raise the office morale with my incredible performances.”

“If by morale you mean headache risk, then sure.”

“GAH! My heart!” Dazai clutched his chest dramatically before falling against his desk, face down and slightly twitching.

“Paperwork. Now.” Kunikida went behind him, giving his ribs a quick tickle before heading out, leaving Dazai shooting up with a startled laugh.

“Mm…I’ll get you back, Doppo. That’s a promise.”

~~~

Dazai wasn’t kidding around either. He was determined to get Kunikida back.

Since the discovery of his…weakness, Kunikida had been adamant on using it against Dazai everyday. Not doing his paperwork? A poke to the ribs. Explaining his elaborate plan for his newest suicide attempt? Cut off with fingers against his neck. Singing and having a grand ol’ time? A squeeze to the thigh that nearly took him to the pearly gates.

Granted, he really shouldn’t have been dancing on the desk…

The point is- Kunikida was being a tyrant, and Dazai was gonna find a way to break him down!

“Hehehehe, this should work just fine…” The bandaged man grinned as he laid out his trap- like a carrot to the rabbit, he’d lure Kunikida in and attack! “Try to resist this, Kuni. Hehehe~”

~~~ “Where is that moron? First he bails on paperwork, then he has the audacity to dance on my desk-” Kunikida’s mutterings came to a halt when his eyes landed on a particular book lying across the coffee table. “Is that…no way!”

But it was! Upon the table was a brand new notebook! Pristine and shiny- untouched by other’s ideals and just waiting for Kunikida to sink his pen into! It was even by his favorite notebook creator- this had to be for him, yes? Oh how he wanted to touch it…

Just as quickly as it came, his excitement was snuffed out- replaced by suspicion. Was it really for him? Sure- he may be the only one to use notebooks for his ability, but that didn’t mean no one else had purpose for them. He shouldn’t be so bold.

….Surely just admiring it wouldn’t hurt, right?

Giving in to his weakness, he came over to the table, studying the craft with careful eyes. Oh, it was so beautiful! Wrapped in plastic to keep from dirtying and oh so lovely! With that- surely he could touch it? He reached out and…

“HA!” Dazai all but yelled from behind, latching onto Kunikida’s waist and digging in. “Gotcha! Gotcha gotcha gotcha! You can’t escape…me.” The brunette blinked. Why wasn’t Kunikida laughing? He pressed into ribs, wiggled his hands against his belly and sides, even pinched his hip! How…

Looking up slowly, he met Kunikida’s raised eyebrow with a sheepish grin. “H-Hello there. How are you today, Kuni?”

“Fine. Yourself?” Kunikida turned in his arms, gently taking Dazai by the shoulders as he forced him back into the couch. Dazai stiffened some, eyes wide as he leaned away. “You look nervous.”

“Oh no- no, not at ahahhall-” Dazai scrunched some with a giggle as the thumb closest to his collarbone massaged circles into his skin, already ticklish. “Dohohoho you like yoohohohur presehehehnt?”

“Oh, so it is for me? I’d say I appreciate the gift if it weren’t so obviously a trap.” The thumb on his otherside began to swirl, making Dazai scrunch up further, his giggle fits increasing. “Did you really think that would work? I believe I’ve told you before I’m not ticklish.”

“Thahahhahat’s buhuhuhuhuhuhuhull! I sthihihihihihll behehehhet you ahahahhahre- ahhhehehahah wahhahhait whahahahhait!” Dazai leaned back further when fingers began tracing his neck, his shoulders all the way up to his ears as he kicked. “Dohohohohon’t not my neehhehehheck!”

“Is it too ticklish for you, Dazai?” Kunikida smirked as he dropped his hands, giving the other a chance to breathe. “Very well then. I’ll skip your neck.”

“Whahahit reahahahally? Cause I don’t mih-Hhehehehehhehehehehehhehehehend!” Dazai shot up with a proper squeal when his ribs were assaulted from the front, ten fingers finding all the soft spots of his torso as they scratched and scribbled against them. “Aheahhahahhahaha, Kuhuuhuhuhnikihhihihihiihda! Gheahahahhaha, it tiihiihihihihckles!”

“That’s kind of the point.” The poet almost laughed himself, shaking his head as Dazai squirmed and giggled beneath him. Wait- what did he say earlier?

With a curious hand, he swept it up and tickled Dazai’s neck some more.

“AHEHAHAHAHAHHA!” A snort squeal shot out of his lips as Dazai attempted to curl up, falling sideways on the couch as he swatted at Kunikida’s hands. The laugh he let out was startling cute- soft and deep; rich with genuine glee as the brunette turtled up. “KUUHUUHHUNIKIHIIHIIHIDA!”

Oh right- he was still tickling. “Yes?”

“PLEHAHAHAHHHASE!”

“And thank you?”

“YOU KNHOOHOHOW WHAHHAHAHT I MEHAHHAHHAN!”

“Do I really?” He snuck a hand beneath his armpit, making the brunette wheeze into near silent laughter. “Come on- speak up. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.”

“eheheheheHAHAHAHHAHA!” The sound came back when Kunikida removed his hand, returning it to Dazai’s waist and kneading gently. “STahhahahaap tiihiihihickling mehehehhehe!”

“Heh. Very well. I suppose you’ve learned your lesson.” Kunikida gave him one last scritch against his neck before pulling his hands back, watching Dazai slump. He looked so defeated- it was rather…

“Adorable.” Kunikida found himself saying outloud.

“Huh?” Dazai blinked, face red as he stared up at Kunikida. The poet felt his own flush a rivaling color, stiffening up at what just came out of his mouth. “Wait- Kuni-”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You just called me-”

“No! That was the wind.”

“You think I’m adorable! Is that why you always tickle me?” Dazai didn’t look alarmed anymore. If anything, he was grinning from ear to ear, eyes sparkling. “I knew you loved my antics! I knew it! No wonder you’ve been playing with me more recently!”

“H-Hush your mouth! I most certainly do not!” Kunikida twisted away, willing his face to cool. He was this close to getting away too! “Your antics are ridiculous and your behavior is that of a child! I find you annoying!”

“Say it to my face then, Kuni~”

The poet turned to do just that, but found the words stuck in his throat at the cheshire grin Dazai was wearing. “Oh, you son of a- GAH!” He turned to leave, marching out of the sitting area of the office.

A few seconds later, he came back, collecting the notebook.

“I’m keeping this. It’s my payment for the stress you give me.” He grunted before leaving again, Dazai’s childlike laughter following him out.

Dang…even his laugh is adorable.

Bastard.

Thanks for reading!

[chenziee]

Of Murder bunnies and stray marimos

Second of my @zosanauzine fics! This one is a part of the digital NSFW add-on~ (Even though they only kiss and say fuck a lot, sorry xD)

The aftersales are still going and B/C grade books are in stock now too so check it out if you haven't!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

[ READ ON AO3 | KO-FI ]

—————

The sun was setting.

The sun was really fucking setting.

They were supposed to have met up hours ago; even Luffy had made it back to the Sunny on time—if only because Nami had told him to be back an hour earlier than everyone else—yet, the stupid swordsman was nowhere to be found.

Not that anyone was surprised but hunting for his… directionally-challenged ass all over the island was always such a waste of time. Not for the first time, Sanji wondered whether they shouldn’t just get a leash for him and tie him to the Sunny’s main mast. Limit his area of unsupervised operations.

Sadly, knowing the Marimo and his track record of making Chopper cry by removing his bandages, he’d just end up chewing through the leash and getting lost anyway.

“Nami~! Let me go explore more,” Luffy whined, drooping over the railing with a pout.

“No,” Nami refused without even looking up from her cartographic notes. “We don’t need two lost children to worry about.”

At that, Luffy stuck his bottom lip out even more. “But I’m so bored!”

“Let’s just leave Zoro here,” Usopp sighed from where he was laying sprawled on the lawn.

“I second that,” Sanji joined in without missing a beat.

More and more voices of agreement started joining in, including the Heart Pirates who had accompanied them on the journey between Wano and the next island, and Nami groaned, “I wish.” She paused to rub the bridge of her nose. “Anyone wanna go look for the idiot?”

“Sanji,” Usopp decided immediately.

Sanji froze in the middle of serving coffee to Robin before he turned to stare at the sniper. “Why the fuck should I go? Do it yourself,” he hissed, then turned back to the most important matter at hand. “Here you go, Robin-chan.”

Robin smiled, accepting the cup. “Thank you. But Usopp is right. You do have the uncanny ability to somehow find Zoro every time.”

"It's not like I—"

"Please, Sanji," Nami said then, giving Sanji an adorable pleading look.

Sanji knew it was on purpose.

He knew she knew he couldn't say no to a lady's request.

But somehow, Sanji couldn’t bring himself to care. He was a proud slave to love, after all. "Of course, Nami-san."

Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Usopp quickly covering his mouth to stifle his snort; Sanji simply clicked his tongue and threw his serving tray at his head. He was only slightly disappointed when Usopp barely managed to avoid the projectile before finally bursting out in uncontrollable laughter.

Bastard.

—————

Sanji grumbled to himself as he made his way through the jungle. It wasn’t that hard to follow the trail of cut off branches and dead or unconscious animals but he couldn’t help but wonder; why him?

Why did he always have to be the one to go look for Zoro?

“Man, this is so fucking annoying!” he snapped, throwing a kick at the next animal to attack him. As if the stupid wandering mosshead wasn’t enough, why did he have to deal with the aggressive wildlife on top of that?

He was really quite done with this island; it had offered a nice variety of cooking ingredients but the bloodthirsty, man-eating bunnies got really old, really fast.

“Oi, Marimo! I know you’re around here! We need to set sail already!” 

Silence. Sanji couldn’t say he was surprised.

He lit himself a cigarette, taking a few drags before he tried again, “Hey, Number 32!”

“What did you just call me, shitty Cook?!”

There we go, Sanji thought to himself, quickly wiping the smile that pulled on his lips off his face. He did not just think Zoro was cute for immediately raising up to the challenge. 

Absolutely not.

So, instead he put on an annoyed expression before making his way through the bushes in the direction the voice had come from.

“There you are, stray Marimo,” he sighed when he made it to the other side and the Marimo in question came to view.

He was standing there, a few of the murder bunnies lying at his feet, a defiant look on his face as he asked, "What do you want, Curly?"

Sanji raised an eyebrow. "Do you realise what time it is? We were supposed to be long gone by now."

"It's not my fault you moved the ship," Zoro snapped.

He obviously tried to sound angry, but at the same time, his eyes veered off to the side, the man refusing to look at Sanji as his ears turned red—although that might have just been the setting sun playing tricks, Sanji chose to believe otherwise. Zoro crossed his arms over his chest before he grumbled something about hopeless crewmates who always got lost the second Zoro took his eyes off them.

Sanji rolled his eyes, biting back the laugh that threatened to bubble out of his chest. Always the same story, always the same excuse.

"The ship hasn't moved since this morning," Sanji said matter-of-factly. "Can't you just admit you're completely fucking lost?"

"No." He sounded so much like a petulant child that this time…

This time Sanji couldn't hold the laughter back. Shaking his head, he sighed, amusement still clear in his voice, “You’re hopeless.”

“Shut up! I’m gonna cut you,” Zoro growled, obviously not happy with Sanji’s teasing—or his glee—while his hand reached for Enma.

Sanji snorted before taking a slow drag of his cigarette, his lips twisting into a challenging smirk as he stepped forward, coming to stand right in front of the swordsman. “As if you could even find me, with your sense of direction.”

“As if I need to look for your ass when you’re right next to me!” Zoro shot back just before the tell-tale metallic sound of a katana leaving its scabbard reached Sanji’s ears.

Taking that as his cue, Sanji moved quickly. He bent his knees slightly, lowering his centre of gravity before shooting forward. Quickly taking his cigarette out of his mouth, he stepped far into Zoro’s personal space, then straightened up, pressing his lips to Zoro’s in a quick kiss.

Zoro froze, his reaction making a smirk pull on Sanji’s lips. “I win.”

Finally, Zoro woke up; resheathing Enma in the most unhappy fashion that he possibly could, the Marimo clicked his tongue in annoyance before he hissed, “That was dirty.”

“I don’t remember there being any rules against it,” Sanji said with a shrug. “Now come on, the others are waiting.”

Turning around, Sanji started heading back the way he came but before he could so much as reach the nearest tree, a hand on his wrist stopped him. He paused, his eyes dropping to where Zoro's fingers held onto his hand before slowly looking up at Zoro questioningly.

He was looking straight at Sanji, an unreadable expression on his face as his grip only tightened. Sanji wanted to ask what was wrong but as soon as he opened his mouth, he closed it again. Seconds passed while the two of them simply stared at each other, neither saying anything, unspoken tension rising until Zoro finally moved.

Or more accurately, pulled on Sanji's hand until he stumbled forward, nearly tripping over his own feet and tumbling to the ground.

Catching himself at the last second, Sanji glared at Zoro. "Oi, Marimo, what the fuck are you—"

Before he could finish the sentence, all words were stolen straight from his mouth when warm lips pressed against his own. Sanji's eyes widened in surprise; for a moment, he couldn't even process what was happening, much less react in any way. He simply stood there, letting Zoro kiss him, the hand that had been gripping his wrist releasing its grip to instead slide down Sanji's palm to lace their fingers together.

It was only when Zoro’s tongue ran over his lips that Sanji’s mind caught up. “What are you doing?” he asked, his voice deceivingly level considering the speed at which his heart was racing.

“What do you think?” Zoro said while rolling his good eye. He didn’t move away the slightest bit either and Sanji could feel every word, every breath on his skin, sending shivers down his spine. “If you were going to do it, you should have done it right.” As soon as Zoro finished talking, he leaned forward, closing the distance again.

This time, Sanji didn’t protest.

He returned the kiss easily, a small laugh escaping him as their lips moved against each other with practised ease, his cigarette slipping through his fingers and falling to the ground when Sanji’s hands automatically wrapped around Zoro’s shoulders. He’d have to remember to pick it up later… but right now, all thought escaped him.

The shitty swordsman was the only thing on his mind; the taste, the smell, the feeling of Zoro against him was familiar, warm and comforting, and it was something Sanji would honestly never get tired of. Just like he would never get tired of the butterflies that fluttered in his stomach every time Zoro touched him like this—not that he'd ever admit to there being any butterflies.

Sanji welcomed the hand that soon found its way on his hip, pushing him back and guiding him until his back hit a tree. Sanji gasped at the impact, a curse on his lips that got swallowed by the tongue that slipped past them. Sanji couldn’t say he was complaining.

Not breaking their kiss, Zoro let go of Sanji’s hand to instead reach upward. Seconds later, warm fingers brushed Sanji's cheek; he had to stop himself from moaning when Zoro buried his fingers in his hair, scratching the scalp slightly. 

Zoro was absolutely doing it on purpose, Sanji knew.

When he cracked his eyes open a little to glare at his partner only to see the cheeky glint in Zoro's gaze, Sanji decided it was high time to push back.

He pulled away slightly, just enough for Zoro to let him go, before going straight for Zoro's neck. Weak point for weak point, right?

Sanji relished in the gasp that Zoro couldn't bite back as soon as Sanji started sucking and licking at the skin just below the swordsman's ear.

But that wasn't enough for Sanji.

He let his hands trace the hems of Zoro's coat before finally slipping them inside, running them over the warm skin of his stomach, then his sides, pushing Zoro's coat open more and more.

Every sharp breath Zoro took, every slight tug on his hair… it was all just making him feel hotter, his skin tingling all over.

If they didn't stop soon…

Suddenly, something rustled behind them.

“Fucking seriously?!” Zoro groaned and Sanji could do nothing but agree with the sentiment.

Moving in tandem, both Zoro and Sanji pulled away from each other, Enma leaving its scabbard at an impossible speed while Sanji’s leg shot out, scalding blue flames licking at his foot. It took only a second for all the fucking bunnies who had attacked all at once to fall to the ground, whimpering after the pirates’ joint attack.

A single second… yet even that was enough to completely murder the mood.

Sanji sighed deeply, pulling out a new cigarette and lighting it, taking a long, long drag. Then another and another. Finally, after most of it was gone, he felt the frustration subside. He turned to look at Zoro, who was still standing there with his katana in hand, looking like he was about to slaughter the entire bunny population on this goddamned island.

Sighing again, Sanji took the few steps that separated them now. Closing his hand into a fist, he sharply knocked Zoro over the head. “Let’s go, Marimo. Or the ship will leave without us.”

It took Zoro a moment to move, but then he slowly put Enma away, his face twisted in annoyance as he looked back at Sanji. “You’re making this up to me later.”

“For what, the fucking bunnies? Forget it,” Sanji hissed before he turned around to lead the way back.

“For getting me all worked up for nothing, you ass,” Zoro grumbled and Sanji could only roll his eyes. "You're worse than the damn bunnies—" 

“Not my fault you’re such a horny Marimo. Also—where are you going?” 

Zoro froze at his words, slowly turning around, obviously searching for where the hell Sanji was talking from. Only when their eyes met, did he open his mouth to reply. “To the ship.” He sounded so confident when he said it, too.

Sanji wanted to rip his hair out.

“I’m literally leading the way! What are you, a toddler?!”

“What did you just say?!”

—————

It was almost dark already by the time two animal noses twitched on the decks of the allied pirate ships.

“Captain, Black Leg and Roronoa are back!” Bepo called from the Tang.

At the same time, Chopper rushed off from where he was playing with Usopp and Penguin, jumping onto the Sunny’s railing to look out towards the island, waving one of his hoofed hands at the two. “Sanji! Zoro! You’re late!” He sounded entirely too cute considering the scolding tone in his voice.

“Fucking finally,” Law muttered to himself, prompting Straw Hat and Nico Robin—who were the closest to him—to snicker at his suffering. As if it was his fault that he had been forced to sit there doing nothing for hours.

“Chopper, can you throw us the ladder?” Black Leg called toward the little reindeer who immediately tapped his forehead with his hoof and ran off.

“What, not gonna show off with your Sky Walk?” Zoro asked.

As expected, Black Leg immediately snapped back, “Are you asking me to carry you up there, princess Marimo?”

Law couldn’t help but roll his eyes. These two really couldn’t go five minutes without fighting—or flirting?—awkwardly, could they?

Before the exchange could escalate, Chopper interrupted the starting fight. “Sorry, here you go!” he called as he dropped down the ladder. “By the way, are you holding hands so Zoro doesn’t get lost again?”

Immediately, complete and utter silence settled over the two ships. It was almost as if even the ocean froze in its tracks, the crashing of the waves fading away while eyes went wide and mouths fell open. Holding hands? Those two?

The same two idiots who had been dancing around each other for as long as Law had known them, the same two idiots who kept making their fighting look like foreplay, the same two idiots who had been filling the Thousand Sunny with unbearable sexual tension constantly? Without ever doing anything about it?

Were the innocent, uninvolved people like Law, the people who were forced to watch them… finally free?

The rope ladder creaked, and the sound echoed around the deck like thunder. No one moved, just waiting quietly in a trance until finally, Black Leg’s head poked out from behind the railing. First his hair, then his face.

His red, burning face.

He looked like a tomato with blond hair and if he wasn’t so stunned, Law would have laughed in his face at the sight he made. As it was, he could only follow the Straw Hats’ lead and stare blankly as the man reached the deck, his eyes glued to the floor; he still refused to look at anyone when he muttered something about dinner and all but ran to the kitchen.

“Impossible,” Nami whispered and suddenly, the spell broke.

“Oh my, I can barely believe my eyes! Although I don’t have eyes!” Brook said.

“We’re getting drunk tonight, oh my god! The tension will finally be gone!” Usopp shouted, his fists shooting high into the air with a relieved laugh and everyone else cheered in agreement.

Just then, Zoro hauled himself over the railing. “Oh, shut up,” he snapped, a highly annoyed expression on his face as he glowered at his crewmates one after the other.

“Hey, man. It’s your own fault we’re super happy about it!” Franky shot back, pointing an accusing finger at Zoro, then at the kitchen to indicate Sanji. “It was high time you two got together.”

Zoro rolled his eyes, opening his mouth to growl something back, but Chopper interrupted him.

“What happened? Why is everyone acting so weird?” he asked innocently.

A few glances were exchanged before Penguin oh-so-helpfully explained, “Because someone finally kissed and made up.”

“Eh?” Chopper let out, his face scrunching up in an adorable, confused frown. “But Zoro and Sanji have kissed before…?”

And the heavy silence was back as this time, everyone stared at Chopper in shock.

“What? What?!” the poor reindeer cried, completely panicked, looking around as if begging for answers.

“You’re fucking kidding me,” Usopp groaned, burying his face in his hands in despair. “Are you telling me we’ve been dealing with all this sexual tension even while it was being resolved? Is there no hope for us?!”

Nami, on the other hand, strode over to Zoro, poking at his chest angrily. “Why didn’t you tell us? When did this start? Do you know how much money I have riding on you idiots?!”

“It’s not my fault you bet on stupid shit!” Zoro hissed back, slapping Nami’s hand away. “And it’s not like we were hiding it when none of you asked!”

“Are you listening to this asshole?” Penguin said, strangely frustrated for a man from a completely different pirate crew.

Law raised his eyebrow while shooting Penguin a look. “You bet on this, didn’t you?”

Penguin only shrugged, not even having the decency to look ashamed. “What can I say, I can never resist drama that doesn’t involve me in any way.”

Law sighed. He was surrounded by idiots.

At that, Straw Hat started laughing. The sound was loud and carefree, reverberating around the entire ship and through Law’s chest from where Luffy was leaning against him, sounding like a happy chime that slowly made everyone relax.

Nami threw her arms into the air and huffed before leaving Zoro alone. Usopp let go of a deep breath and shot Zoro one last glare. Nico Robin only chuckled at the crew’s reactions, looking so relaxed the entire time that Law wondered whether she had had an inkling about Zoro and Black Leg’s relationship.

Even Law felt a tug on the corners of his mouth, a smile trying to force its way on his lips.

But then, something else dawned on him.

“Oh my god,” he groaned, his head falling forward until his face was buried in the crook of Luffy’s neck. “I’m never setting foot in the crow’s nest ever again.”

“Why?” Luffy asked.

Law marvelled at his innocence. “Why? Because they definitely fucked in there!”

“Torao, don’t be a baby,” Nami said, and Law could basically hear her eyes rolling.

“Well, excuse me for not wanting to touch anything that anyone might have fucked on,” Law snapped back, not even bothering to look up and simply hoping his voice would convey the disgust he felt.

A beat of silence passed.

“Torao…” Franky started slowly. “Luffy’s literally sitting on your lap right now.”

“I don’t see your point,” Law muttered back.

Law felt Luffy nod in agreement. “Yeah, we’re not fucking anywhe—mmmfff!”

“Not one more word in front of Chopper,” Nico Robin said firmly, a clear threat in her voice.

“Nico-ya, he’s a doctor. I’m pretty sure he knows how this—” Suddenly, a bodiless hand slapped over his mouth, probably in the same fashion as it did over Luffy’s.

“I don’t care. Not. One. Word.”

Oh, for fuck’s sake…

When Law finally looked up to give her an unimpressed stare, he startled at the glare she was giving him. Suddenly, he remembered who she was—Nico Robin, the Demon Child; someone who had been on the run from the entire world all alone for twenty years. This was a woman who had definitely killed before… and who certainly didn’t look like she was above murder now.

Law was ashamed to admit he was too scared to protest her demands right then.

Thankfully, before anyone else could notice how he froze in fear, a loud yawn attracted everyone’s attention. “If we’re done here, I’m going to take a nap.” Zoro announced, then took a step forward.

Immediately, Nami, Usopp, and Penguin turned to him, identical sharp, positively greedy looks in their eyes.

“Not before we find out who won that bet, you don’t!”

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS LOST EDEN WonderGOO Tokuten Drama CD ”Coffin Decoration ~ Out of the Counsel of Three comes the Greatest Fashion Sense”

Original title: 棺桶★デコレーション～三人寄れば最強のセンス!?～

Source: Diabolik Lovers LOST EDEN WonderGOO Tokuten Drama CD

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Midorikawa Hikaru, Takashi Kondou & Tatsuhisa Suzuki

Translator’s note: This CD added three days to my lifespan with how absolutely ADORABLE Subaru is. ;w; I love it when he gets super excited about coffins and such, haha. That being said, Ayato and Yuma were hilarious in this CD as well. I loved how they all work together in the end to make what is probably the strangest coffin in all of human and Vampire history. xD 

Ayato: …Goddamnit, Reiji. Can he just stop complainin’ ‘bout every single damn thing? I’m not the only one whose room is a mess! It’s my room so it can be as messy as I want it to be, right? …Huh?

Ayato suddenly comes to a halt.

Ayato: Is that…?

Subaru: …

Ayato approaches Subaru. 

Ayato: Oi, Subaru! Whatcha doin’ over here? …It doesn’t happen every day that Mr. Shut-In leaves his room. 

*Rustle*

Subaru: Shut up!! It’s none of your fuckin’ business, is it!? I’m busy right now so leave me alone!

Ayato: Busy? All you’re doin’ is lookin’ inside some store. …Ah? 

*Rustle* 

Ayato: What’s this? 

Subaru: Can’t you tell? It’s a customizable coffin. 

Ayato: Oh. Now that you mention it, it does have these weird decorations on it. …Oh! Are those different kinds of sweets and candy on top? Interestin’! 

Subaru: You like that overly cutesy one? The one on the far right is obviously the coolest!

Ayato: Hah? The one with the black wings? …Also could they have fit on any more skulls? It’s way too much.

Yuma approaches them.

Yuma: …Aah? If it isn’t the Loudmouth and the Shut-In. What brings ya two here? 

Ayato: Subaru wants to decorate his coffin, apparently. 

Yuma: Decorate? Is that the sorta thing you’re into mate? 

Subaru: I’m not…!! I never said I’d actually do it, did I!?

Ayato: But you’ve been lookin’ at this even way before I came here, right? I bet you actually want to give it a try.

Subaru: …!! W-Well…

Yuma: Heeh…Well, check it out! It says that right now, ya can put on as many ornaments as ya can fit on there!

Subaru: …

Ayato: If you’re too scared to go inside by yourself, I can come with you? I’ll even help you pick out some stuff! I’ll sniff out the real cool stuff!

Subaru: …I can only see this endin’ badly. 

Yuma: In that case, I’ll tag along too! Let’s make a coffin that would turn anyone into a shut-in. (1)

Subaru: You guys are makin’ fun of me, aren’t you? Besides, aren’t you outside for a reason as well!? 

Yuma: Yeah. I’m on my way to buy stuff for tonight’s dinner. But I still have plenty time, so it should be fine. 

Ayato: I only left the house to escape from Reiji’s ramblin’. …Come on, let’s go inside already. 

*Rustle* 

Subaru: …Hey!

Ayato: You grab his other arm, Yuma. 

Yuma: Gotcha. 

*Rustle* 

Subaru: …! Ugh…!

Ayato: Don’t worry. You’ll be cryin’ tears of joy by the end.

Yuma: Exactly. Leave it to us!

They drag Subaru inside the store. 

Subaru: As if…!! Why do I have to do this with you two fuckers anyway…!? I can already tell you’re goin’ to turn it into some kind of weird shit…!! …So stop pulling me…!!

*TIMESKIP*

Ayato: Oh…They’ve got so many decorations to choose from. Wow.

Subaru: Aren’t their coffins a lil’ too big as well? This is pretty much twice the size of my current one. 

Yuma: You’ve got a point. This doesn’t look like it’s meant for one person. 

Ayato: What are you sayin’? Not only does it give you more space to work with, but it’ll obviously be more comfortable to sleep in as well!

Yuma: Is that how it works? 

Subaru: Che…I can’t keep up with you idiots any longer. I’m goin’ home. 

Ayato: That kind of defeats the purpose, doesn’t it? …Let me see…Oh! What do you think ‘bout this one? 

*Rustle* 

Yuma: Ah! Why a huge cross out of all things!? Ya really think this guy will like that?

Ayato: Ah…? I guess you’re right, it’s kinda creepy. Oi, Subaru. Let’s go for somethin’ else after aーー

Subaru: Not bad…

Ayato & Yuma: Haah…!? 

Subaru: I should probably put this one on the lid. Also…It’d look even better by adding a pair of bat wings. …Wait, no! The dragon wings are kind of temptin’ too…

Yuma: No way…That’s the sort of thing he likes? What’s wrong with your lil’ brother’s taste!?

Ayato: Don’t ask me!!

*Rustle* 

Subaru: Oi, you guys should bring me some decorations too. If they’re good, I’ll even use them. 

Ayato: That arrogant tone pisses me off, but seems like he finally got in the mood. …Let’s do this. I’ll put on some weird shit and turn it into the lamest coffin ever seen. Hehe…

Yuma: I mean, I guess this is a decent way to kill some time, so count me in.

Subaru: What are you two whisperin’ ‘bout? 

Ayato: Nothin’! I’ll go fetch somethin’ that’ll blow you out of your socks, so just you wait!

Yuma: You just stick to bein’ your usually loner self and have fun decoratin’ ‘kay? 

*TIMESKIP*

Subaru: …Okay. This should do for the lid. 

Ayato: Oi, Subaru! Check this one out…!!

*Rustle*

Subaru: Ah? What? Also, what took you so damn long!? I’m pretty much done except for the sidーー …Wait, that’s…

*Dun dun*

Ayato: It’s a mini-sized takoyaki grill! If you put this on your coffin, you’ll be able to enjoy takoyaki all while livin’ the loner life! Isn’t that amazing!? 

Subaru: Hard pass! Besides, if I start grillin’ takoyaki inside my coffin, I won’t be able to sleep from the stench afterwards, will I? 

Ayato: Haah? But it’s the best smell in the world…? You really don’t get it. 

Subaru: I’m pretty sure you’re the only person in this world who feels that way. 

Ayato: Fine then. Guess I’ll have to make do with this one instead…

*Rustle rustle* 

Subaru: …Please don’t tell me that round thing is a takoyaki. 

Ayato: Huh? Are you really that stupid? What else does it look like to you? Well, it’s only a decoration and not the real thing though. 

Subaru: But why!? You’re the only person who’d be happy havin’ that thing on their coffin!

Ayato: You already rejected the takoyaki grill so at least let me have this? You’re really provin’ the point that the youngest child is always the most selfish one. 

Yuma walks up to them. 

Yuma: Are ya’ll havin’ an argument again? Ya never grow tired of that, do ya?

Subaru: We’re not! It’s just Ayato’s who’s tryin’ to put stupid shit on my coffin!

Ayato: Ah…? Maybe you should stop shootin’ down all of my suggestions!

Yuma: Oh come on, lay it off. You’re causin’ issues for the store. …Anyway, I brought some stuff with me. 

*Rustle* 

Ayato: Let me see…

*Rustle rustle*

Ayato: Carrots, peppers, eggplant and cabbage…These are all vegetables, aren’t they?

Yuma: Gotta get those greens in. Works wonders for yer health. 

Subaru: No but…Those are not somethin’ you’d put on a coffin, right?

Yuma: Nah, don’t worry. They’re all just incredibly well-made replicas. 

Ayato: Heeh, these as well? After seeing the takoyaki from earlier as well, I have to say that they really upped their replica game. 

Subaru: That’s not the issue…!! What I’m tryin’ to say is that these don’t fit the aesthetic at all!

Yuma: Hah…? You are in no position to judge, are you!? The fuck did you do to this coffin? 

Ayato: Geh…! Now that you mention it, Subaru’s creation is…on a whole different level. 

Yuma: Skulls and crows…Ah? And are those thorny vines and snakes running across? 

Ayato: And can we also mention the really creepy face in the middle? Is that a monster of some sort?

Subaru: Take a proper look! It’s a devil! Can’t you see its horns? 

Ayato: Do devils have horns?

Yuma: Beats me. …Or rather, why would a Vampire put that on their coffin? 

Subaru: I just thought the design looked cool, that’s all. 

Ayato: Then these spider web-like patterns were done on purpose too? 

Subaru: Obviously. 

Yuma: I don’t get it. 

Ayato: I don’t even want to understand. 

Yuma: Guess I have no other choice but to fix it up for ya a lil’...

*Rustle rustle* 

Subaru: Oi! Don’t be changin’ the composition without my permission!

Yuma: Oh come on, just watch. 

*Rustle rustle* 

Yuma: First you put this here…and then…

*Rustle rustle*

Yuma: …There we go! The carrots add a nice touch, don’t ya think?

Ayato: Heeh…You had the crows hold carrots with their feet, huh? 

Subaru: I mean…I guess it doesn’t look half bad…

Ayato: …Oh!

*Ping* 

Ayato: I just had a genius idea as well…! If I put the takoyaki inside this lizard’s mouth…

*Rustle rustle* 

Yuma: Ah! I kind of like it!

Subaru: Say, don’t you think the eggplant would fit well with the color palette as well? 

Ayato: It’s purple after all! Why don’t you try wrapping one of those chains around it?

*Cling cling* 

Subaru: …Not bad. 

Ayato: Let’s add a basketball while we’re at it as well. See? It looks good with a crown of thorns placed on top of it.

Yuma: In that case…The cabbage should go inside the skull, right?

Subaru: No, wait. Tomatoes would work way better. 

Yuma: I’d say we go for cherry tomatoes then. It’d look way better if we stuff a bunch of them inside. 

Subaru: Yuma, you…You’re a genius!

Ayato: Oi, Subaru. We need somethin’ big which really stands out. 

Subaru: Ah, now that you mention it…I saw a spider ornament with really long legs earlier. It didn’t click with me earlier, but it might actually improve the overall design! I’ll go get it!

Ayato: Yeah! We’ll decorate some of the other empty spaces while you’re gone. 

Yuma: Hurry up, ‘kay?

Subaru: Kuh…Don’t mess it up!

Subaru runs off.

*TIMESKIP*

*Rustle*

Subaru: …It’s perfect!

Ayato: Yeah! We created a true masterpiece!

Yuma: We didn’t skimp on the details after all. 

Subaru: I was kind of worried for a sec…But I never thought the end result would be this good!

Ayato: That’s all thanks to my help. 

Yuma: What are ya sayin’? I’m the one who did such a great job with the composition. 

Subaru: Hah…? We were able to achieve this result because I did the lid first.

Ayato: Excuse me!? 

Subaru: Got a problem, huh!? 

Yuma: For the millionth time, don’t start fightin’ inside the store! …Anyway, don’t we need to square up now?

Subaru: Ah, right…

Ayato: I hope you’re not gonna tell us you don’t have any money.

Subaru: Hah? Of course I do!

Subaru walks to the counter. 

Yuma: Anyway, how much does one of these cost? 

Ayato: Hah? Didn’t you say that there’s an all-you-can-fit deal? You must have seen the price then, no? 

Yuma: Nah, I didn’t pay attention to that.

Subaru: (muffled) ーー Haah!? Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me!? 

Ayato: …!? What’s that guy’s problem? Why is he shoutin’ out of nowhere? 

Yuma: Should we go take a look? 

Ayato and Yuma walk up to him.

Ayato: Oi, what’s up?

Yuma: Did ya forget yer wallet? 

Subaru: I didn’t! But look at the damn total!

Yuma: The price? …Ahー It’s surprisingly…expensive, huh? 

Subaru: I don’t have nearly enough money on me. 

Yuma: I’ve only got some small change as well. …I mean, there’s the money Ruki gave me to buy food butーー If I use that, my head will be on the choppin’ block…

Ayato: Oh geez, guess I have no other choice. I can easily pay this mu…

*Rustle* 

Ayato: Hm…?

Subaru: Ayato…

Ayato: Now that you mention it, I didn’t bring my wallet with me. 

Yuma: First ya talk all big and now this!? 

Subaru: Or rather…If my pocket money isn’t nearly enough, I doubt addin’ yours to it will make much of a different. 

Ayato: Ahーah. We put so much time and effort into it as well. 

Yuma: We should have probably checked the price tag first.

Subaru: Haah…My coffin…I’ve decided! I’ll start a part-time job at this store and one day that coffin shall be mine!

Yuma: Haah!? What are ya sayin’...!? 

Ayato: It’s not worth goin’ that for, is it? 

Subaru: Right! You two should come work here with me as well. I’ll go have a word with the manager, so stay right here, ‘kay!?

Subaru runs off.

Ayato & Yuma: Haahーー!?

 ーー THE END ーー

[moltengoldveins]

Episode 6 Commentary because I can (first half of the ep. Cause I have the Attention Deficit in High Definition:

Dani low key implying Elyse can run if she needs to, my girl XDDD

Kyana and Dani both scanning for people in white to murder my beloved, I just learned that was a job of the MOH and I’m so happy about it.

Nell in the mother of the bride dress I can’t.

VR-LA is so Handsome, my Son, I Love Him.

Karundetrassi and Hira are just….. the funniest duo I think I can imagine. Bellbottom jeans taken to the cartoonish extreme, jangly pants made of shiny saucers, sheer button up alllll the way up, nips on Full Display, these two don’t know how to dress themselves for a wedding.

Delphine lookin GOOD. DANG.

Gosh darn reporters, why. (VR-LA was like two seconds from teleporting her into the sun my guy XD)

“I guess this is what we’re wearing.” Vahs my beloved.

“Is she wearing white?” “She is wearing white.” “ABSOLUTELY NOT.”

(Wine thigh holster is an amazing mental image and one I find unnaturally appealing. I might do that for my bffs wedding.)

-Aaaaaand it’s KYANA WITH A BOTTLE OF WIIINE!!!! *Air horn noises*-

“Well well well, if it isn’t the consequences of our… fricken… backstories, ah whatever, I Cast Fireball.”

(my phone really hates spelling Vhas’s name. So far I’ve gotten autocorrect to write Bans, Vans, Chas, and Baja. I’m loosing my mind.)

anyway, Vahs&Kyana battle friendship is my new favorite thing :D

Dani!! Taking charge!!! Making plans!!!

“Oi! Bloodbag!” Is my new favorite greeting.

“Ugh, I keep forgetting my dumb wedding and it’s dumb bonus effect to my dumb ac.”

“I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE AGAINST YOU MUSHROOMS!!!!” “I do not see it, I do not believe it.” This just in, Area Man Actively Incapable of Gaining VR-LA’s Respect Despite Multiple Attempts, More at 6

Noir and Sophia’s cold read of ‘She gets knocked down, but she gets up again.’ ‘They’re never gonna keep her down.’ While in the background Kyana carves into the bride like a firm salami is probably my favorite part of this fight so far XD

CURSE AUSTIN AND HIS INTIMATE KNOWLEDGE OF VR-LAS ABILITY TO COUNTERSPELL ONLY ON REACTIONS NO-

…. Vahs Backstory Pog???

aaaaaand the Break

[once-upon-an-imagine]

Bad Liar (Chapter Five) - Fred Weasley

A/N: ahhhh xD I have no idea how this turned out! I hope you guys like it though :D

Prompt List

Warnings: Adrian Pucey, I think that’s it xD let me know if I missed anything though

Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter :D gif isn’t mine :)  

Your name: submit What is this?

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Bad Liar

Did all my dreams never mean one thing? Does happiness lie in a diamond ring? Oh, I've been asking Oh, I've been asking for problems, problems, problems

“(Y/N), are you listening to me?”

“Huh?” you were snapped out of your thoughts and looked back to your friend. “Uh- y-yes” you insisted.

“Really? What was I talking about?” Angelina smirked.

“Um… about… the Yule Ball” you tried.

“Lucky guess” she glared at you. “Merlin, could you be more in love with him?” she laughed.

“W-what?” you asked, nervously. How does she know?

“Fred! You can’t stop staring at him” Katie intervened. Right, you’re ‘dating’, so nothing seems out of the ordinary to them. “I think is so sweet” she smiled.

“Yes, you look so much happier with him than you ever did with Cedric” Angelina added.

“Really?” you asked, smiling a little.

“Yes! Fred treats you like you’re the only thing that matters to him” Katie told you.

“That’s not true” you said, feeling your cheeks burn before you felt a small paper ball hit you on the head. You turned to see where it came from and saw Fred smiling at you from the other side of the classroom. Fred looked back at Professor Snape to make sure he wasn’t looking and then he started motioning to you so you would get his message. He pointed at you, then he made a stupid little dance, and then he pointed at himself, mouthing the words: ‘You. Ball. Me.’ You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help to laugh a little and nodded at him. “Yes” you nodded with a big smile that Fred returned before winking at you. “What?” you asked looking back at your friends who had their eyebrows raised at you.

“You were saying?” Katie smirked.

“Shut up!” you insisted, relieved when Professor Snape released the class and you all made your way to the Gryffindor Tower. It wasn’t long before Fred caught up with you and your friends.

“Hi, sweetheart” Fred said, throwing his arm around your shoulders. “I got this for you” he said, placing two chocolate chip cookies.

“Oi! Those were mine!” you heard the faint voice of Ron not so far from you.

“Thank you, Freddie” you smiled, kissing his cheek.

“What were you ladies talking about?” he asked, holding your hand and you closer to him.

“Nothing-” you started.

“Actually” Angelina interrupted you. “We were talking about how cute you two are” she smirked at you too and you rolled your eyes.

“Why, thanks, Angie” Fried smiled, kissing your forehead and smiling dreamily at you. “I believe so” he stated. “Don’t you, darling?”

“O-of course” you chuckled nervously as you finally reached the room where you had to wait for Professor McGonagall.

“Settle down everyone” Professor McGonagall said walking inside the room. You were standing on one side of the room with Angelina and Katie as the boys stood on the other side of the room. “Now, the Yule Ball has been a tradition of the Tri-Wizard Tournament since its inception. On Christmas Eve night we and our guests gather in the Great Hall for well-mannered frivolity. As representatives of the host school, I expect each and every one of you to put your best foot forward, and I mean this literally because the Yule Ball is first and foremost… a dance” she stated as groans emerged from the boys’ side and the girls seemed a lot more excited. “Silence” Professor McGonagall continued. “The house of Godric Gryffindor has commanded the respect of the wizarding world for nearly ten centuries. I will not have you in the course of a single evening besmirching that name by behaving like a babbling, bumbling band of baboons” she warned.

“Try saying that five times faster” George whispered to Fred making the guys laugh.

“Now, to dance is to let the body breathe, inside every girl a secret swan slumbers longing to burst forth and take flight” she said looking at the girls.

“Something’s about to burst out of Hilary but I don’t think it’s a swan” Ron whispered to Seamus, and they laughed.

“Inside every boy, a lordly lion prepared to prance” Professor McGonagall said glaring at Ron. “Mr. Weasley, will you be so kind to join me?”

Ron’s smile fell from his face as Professor McGonagall pulled him up to dance. You saw the faces of Harry, George, and Fred and you were trying really hard to contain your own laugh.

“Now, place your right hand on my waist” she told him.

“W-where?” Ron asked nervously.

“My waist, Mr. Weasley” Professor McGonagall repeated. Ron did as he was told and heard a wolf whistle coming from the crowd that you knew came from Fred. He turned to glare at the exact direction where he knew it came from and saw Harry trying to hide a laugh while the twins smirked at him. “Now, bend your arm. Mr. Filch” she said. Filch put on the record player and the music started. “And… one, two, three… one, two, three…” she repeated dancing around with Ron who was not having the best time of his life. Fred mocked his little brother, dancing with George as he smiled brightly at you, as you tried extremely hard not to laugh. He really loved this girl.

“Promise me you will never let him forget this” Harry leaned down to whisper to the twins.

“Never” they both said at the same time.

“Now, everybody, come together” Professor McGonagall said as she kept on dancing.

“May I have this dance, love?” Fred said, bowing in front of you, and you giggled loudly before taking his hand.

“Of course, Freddie” you said sweetly as you started dancing around the room.

“So…” he said, getting your attention. “I’ve been thinking-”

“Really? Well, that’s a first” you mocked him and he glared at you.

“Do you want to know, or not?”

“Sorry, continue” you smiled.

“Well, since this is the last Hogsmeade, I thought maybe we could… go on a date” he said, hoping you didn’t notice the blush rushing to his cheeks.

“Y-you… you want to go on a date with me?”

“Well, you know, given that… I’m your boyfriend and… we’re going to the Yule Ball and all” he chuckled. “It occurred to me that we never really had a date” he told you as you raised your eyebrow at him. “Fine! Ginny and Hermione asked me about our first date and when they found out we haven’t been in one, Ginny nearly kills me” he admitted.

“Fred, you don’t have to take me out on a date” you giggled.

“I know I don’t have to but, firstly, you deserve it. I mean I would even be a worse boyfriend than Diggory if I don’t take you out on a date” he explained.

“That’s sweet, Freddie” you smiled. “What’s the second motive?”

“Ginny terrifies me and she said she would actually kill me if I don’t” he quickly said.

“Well, I wouldn’t want her to kill my boyfriend and only prospect date for the Yule Ball” you chuckled. “So, I’d love to go on a date with you” you told him, trying as hard as you could to ignore the butterflies in your stomach when he smiled brightly at you.

“Great” he said, trying to contain his own excitement. “It’s a date, then” he smiled.

“It’s a date.”

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

You stood outside of Gladrags Wizardwear after you and your friends bought the perfect dresses for the Yule Ball. You were nervously waiting for Fred to arrive so the two of you could go on your first official date. You weren’t sure why you were so nervous. This was Fred. your best friend since you first arrived at Hogwarts. But now, suddenly, everything had changed.

You felt butterflies every time he smiled at you. You felt your cheeks burning when he complimented you or he kissed you. You thought it was probably because your last relationship ended up being a shitshow and Fred was the first person to show you any kind of love. Even a better love than Cedric ever did. So, you decided that today you were going to rationally organize your feelings for Fred. Because you could not be in love with your best friend, right? So the only logical thing to do is to take feelings out of this and just, think about it instead.

“Hey, love” you heard that beautiful voice behind you. Okay, this may be harder than you thought.

“Hi, Freddie” you smiled, turning around and smiling at him.

“What are you doing out here in the cold?” he asked, taking off his scarf and placing it around your neck. And here come the stupid butterflies.

“W-well, I was just waiting for you” you told him. “It is chaos in there” you said, waving at the store. “There are a billion girls trying on different dresses, if you went in, you’re never coming out” you told him.

“Well, that’s very thoughtful of you” he said, holding your hand and pulling you away. “Wait, where is your bag? Did you not get a dress?”

“I did, but Angelina took it with her” you told him.

“Why?”

“Because it’s a surprise and I knew that if I had it with me you would take it out and see it” you smiled.

“That’s not-!” he started. “Okay, yeah, that does sound like me” he laughed.

“So, where are we going?” you questioned, intrigued.

“Well, don’t worry, we are not going to Madam Puddifoot’s because I know you hated your dates there with Diggory” he told you.

“Y-you remember that?”

“Of course, I do” he said as if it was nothing. “So, instead, I thought we could go to Zonko’s, Toms and Scrolls, Honeydukes, and then the Three Broomsticks” he suggested.

“Really?” you asked excitedly.

“Yeah” Fred said, getting nervous all of the sudden. “W-would you rather do something else? I knew I should have asked you, but Hermione said-”

“Fred” you stopped him, kissing his cheek. “That sounds like a great date!” you smiled.

“Yeah?” Fred smiled at you.

“Yeah” you nodded as Fred kissed your forehead.

After visiting all your favorite Hogsmeade spots, you were now sitting in a booth at the Three Broomsticks and Fred brought two butterbeers to the table. Your nerves quickly faded away with Fred. Because this was still Fred. He was still your best friend. And you were now 100% sure that you were in love with him.

“So… all of the sweets are to make you ill?” you asked as Fred explained to you his latest invention with George while the two of you ate your Honeydukes candy. The Skiving Snackbox.

“Yes, not seriously ill, just ill enough to get you out of a class when you feel like it. They're double-ended, color-coded chews. If you eat the orange half of the Puking Pastilles, you throw up. Moment you've been rushed out of the lesson for the hospital wing, you swallow the purple half which restores you to full fitness, enabling you to pursue the leisure activity of your own choice during an hour that would otherwise have been devoted to unprofitable boredom. That's what we're putting in the adverts, anyway. So far we have Fainting Fancies, Fever Fudge, Nosebleed Nougat, and Puking Pastilles” he said, happily.

“Freddie, those sound brilliant!” you said, munching on a Sugar Quill. “You and George are really geniuses, you know that, right?”

“I think you’re probably the only person who’s ever called us that, love” he chuckled, eating another Chocolate Frog.

“I’m pretty sure I won’t be the last” you smiled, sitting closer to him. “Um… Freddie?”

“Yeah?”

You felt your heart beating a bit faster when he smiled at you, with a bit of foam on his upper lip and you cleaned it with your napkin. You wanted to tell him.

“I uh-” you wanted to say that you loved him and that you wanted this to be your first actual date. But instead, something else came out. “I have to go to the bathroom” you chickened out. “I’ll be right back” you smiled nervously, getting out of the booth.

Fred sighed, hoping that he hadn’t made anything weird. He had actually been looking forward to today all week. Well, if he was being honest, longer than that. A lot longer. He thought he might just see where you stood with him after a date and maybe he would get the courage to tell you that he wanted this to be your actual first date. Everything had been perfect so far, and he had been dying to kiss you since he picked you up in front of Gladrags Wizardwear.

“Well, isn’t this sweet?”

Fred was snapped out of his thoughts when a very unpleasant, yet familiar voice sat on the booth in front of him.

“What do you want, Pucey?”

“Relax, Weasel, I come in peace” he said, grabbing one of your Sugar Quills and Fred glared at him. “My bad, Weasley” he corrected with a smirk. “Sorry, force of habit. But, I do come in peace-”

“I seriously doubt that” Fred told him.

“Look, mate, I’m just looking out for you” he said, starting to eat your Sugar Quill.

“You’re looking out for me?” Fred asked with an angry chuckle.

“Yes, mate, I don’t think it’s fair, the way (Y/N)’s using you” he said.

“(Y/N)’s not using me” Fred said defensively.

“Isn’t she? Then why are you pretending to date her?”

“I hate to break it to you, but I’m not pretending. We’re in a relationship, no matter how that breaks your… well whatever it is you have instead of a heart” Fred told him.

“Uh-huh. So, that’s why she was Diggory’s treasure in the last task?”

“Look, you don’t know what you’re talking about-”

“I do, mate. She’s just going to use you until Diggory wants her back and then she’s gonna dump you” Adrian shrugged.

“That’s not true” Fred said, rolling his eyes.

“Isn’t it? Then I guess I’m wrong and the two of you are completely and madly in love” he smirked, taking a bite of the sweet.

“I really don’t get why this is any of your business or why you insist that (Y/N) and I are not dating-”

“You’re not” Adrian added.

“But, I can assure you that we are very happy with each other” Fred told him, starting to feel a bit on edge.

“That’s not what I asked you is it?” Adrian smirked. “See, I can clearly see that you’re in love with her. You have that stupid face whenever she comes near you. But, she doesn’t seem to feel the same way about you” he explained. “So, that means that this whole ‘thing’” he said, making air quotes with his fingers. “It’s until she gets bored. Dumps you, and runs back to Diggory.”

“Why the fuck would you even care? You need to leave (Y/N) alone-”

“Or what?” he snickered. “This whole ‘jealous boyfriend’ thing is not a very good color on you, Weasley” Adrian sighed.

“Is this because she hates you? Because you would probably be the last person she would date? Because you’re really not helping your case by being here and telling me all this” Fred told him.

“She doesn’t hate me. Trust me” Adrian told him, glaring at him a little.

“I think that out of the two of us, I know her pretty well” Fred said. “And believe me, she does” he smirked.

“How well do you actually know her, Weasley?” Adrian said, returning the smirk. “Because I will admit, if you are at least getting those benefits out of this, I might be just a little bit jealous” he said, noticing Fred’s cheeks and ears turning red.

“Get the fuck out of my table” Fred said, smashing his fist against the table. “I swear, Pucey, if you speak about (Y/N) like that again, I will kill you with my bare hands” he said between clenched teeth. Adrian simply smiled at Fred and stole another one of your Sugar Quills.

“Fine. I’ll leave” he said as if it was nothing. “But when she gets tired of you and runs back to Diggory, don’t say I didn’t try to warn you, Weasel” he said before getting up.

Fred took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down before you came back. He didn’t want you to see him like this, even if you would probably notice something was wrong like you did whenever he was upset. I can clearly see that you’re in love with her. But, she doesn’t seem to feel the same way about you. He hated to admit it but, Adrian was probably right. Not about the part of you using him, of course, he had agreed to do this with you. But what was going to happen once this whole thing was over? He hadn’t thought that far ahead. He wasn't sure if he would be able to just go back to being your friend. But what was he supposed to do? You didn’t love him back. Probably worse than Adrian being right, George was right. All along. He kept saying that this was the worst idea but he still did it. And now, he wasn’t sure how to out. Because he didn’t want to get out. But he knew you would.

“Hey” you said, snapping him out of his thoughts and sitting down next to him again. “Sorry I took so long, there was a line” you lied. You were trying to think of the best way to tell Fred that you were in love with him. But now his mood seemed to have shifted. “Is… everything okay?”

“Yeah” Fred quickly said, clearing his throat. But you could tell he was lying.

“Are you sure? You seem upset-”

“I’m fine, (Y/N)” he insisted. (Y/N). Not ‘love’ as he usually called you. Even more, now that the two of you were dating. You knew he was hiding something. Which was what really worried you. Fred never lied to you. “I’m gonna get something else to drink, okay?” he asked, getting up and walking away before you could respond.

“O-okay” you said, deflated. Maybe today wasn’t the best day to tell him after all.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

“I’m in love with Fred!”

“BLOODY HELL!” George jumped, sitting up on his bed. “What the fuck, (Y/N)? What if I had been naked?”

“I would have been scarred for life! Did you hear what I just said!”

“You can’t just barge in on me like that! What if I was taking a huge dump!”

“Well, you weren’t!”

“But what if I was?”

“Then, gross! Did you fucking hear what I said!”

“Yes, yes. You’re in love with Fred” he rolled his eyes.

“I’m sorry to dump this on you, it’s just… well, everyone else thinks I’m already in love with him, you know? And now I am and I don’t know what to do! I didn’t see this coming!”

“Really? You didn’t think that pretending to date someone, holding hands, hugging, and kissing as much as you two do would make you develop feelings for him?”

“No…” you insisted but George glared at you. “Okay, fine! You were right! You said one of us would end up falling for the other and those feelings would not be reciprocated and IT HAPPENED!” you said, freaking out. “I’m the one! I’m the one who fell for Fred and now I don’t know what to do!”

“(Y/N), calm down. You’re overreacting!” he laughed.

“OVERREACTING?! No! George, I fucked up! We promised we wouldn’t do this! What am I supposed to do now? I can’t be with Fred anymore, but I also don’t want to break up with him because… well, I do want to be with him! But that’s not fair to him! That would be extremely selfish of me so… what do I do now?”

“Well… you could… tell him how you feel?” George suggested.

“Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Or… or, I don’t tell him and then I save myself from embarrassment when he rejects me!” you said, slapping his arm.

“So what is your plan then, to fake date him until he falls in love with you?”

“Do you think that could work?”

“(Y/N), this is ridiculous! Just talk to him and sort this out so you can both admit that you love each other and stop driving me crazy!” he snapped, widening his eyes when he realized what he had just said. He hoped he was wrong, but the look on your face told him that he had just fucked up.

“What did you just say?” you asked nervously.

“Uh... um... n-nothing! I said nothing at all!” he panicked.

“George!”

“I just said that you should tell Fred that you love him-!”

“No, no, no.... the, um, the... love 'each other' part?”

“E-each other? I don’t recall saying anything about each other-”

“Oh, Merlin!” you gasped. “Fred- Fred’s in love with me?”

“Did I- uh? Did I say that? I don’t think I’ve said that!”

“George!”

“Alright, fine! You two are a couple of idiots that are ridiculously in love with each other and are too idiots to notice!”

“W-well, what else did he say? I mean, does he… want to go out with me? R-really? Not this fake thing we’ve been doing?”

“Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee or something!”

“George, this is serious!”

“Look, if Fred finds out that I told you this, he’s going to kill me!”

“If you don’t tell me what you know, I’ll kill you!” you smiled sweetly at him.

“Fine” he sighed. “What do you want to know?”

“How long has Fred been in love with me?”

“Probably since the day we met you on the Hogwarts Express, but he admitted it to me a few years ago” he said. “You didn’t really notice? You’re the only one he lets call him ‘Freddie’” he said.

“That’s not true, you call him Freddie!”

“Yes, whenever I make fun of you!”

“W-well, why didn’t he ever say anything to me?”

“Why do you think, (Y/N)? For the exact same reason you were just freaking out about him finding out you love him” he explained. “He didn’t want to make things weird between you two” he told you. “That’s also why he kind of distanced himself from you when you were dating Diggory” he said, rolling his eyes a little.

“Oh, Merlin” you said, sitting on one of the desks. “Then… w-why did he agree to pretend to date me? Now I feel horrible” you told him.

“See, this is why I said it was a bad idea. I just…” he sighed. “I didn’t want him to get hurt because I knew the more time he would spend with you, the more he would fall for you. I must admit though, you falling in love with him was a plot twist” he smirked.

“Shut up!” you glared at him. “Wait, so… this is a good thing!”

“What is?”

“I love Fred and he loves me so… I just have to talk to him so we can be together… but you know, seriously this time” you told him.

“Really?” he glared at you. “That’s the first thing I told you to do and you yelled at me and you slapped my arm!”

“Well, that was before I knew Fred loved me too!”

“Okay, so… now you know” he smirked. “So, what are you going to do about it?”

“That’s a good question! I mean, I’m gonna tell him, but how should I tell him?”

“For Merlin’s sake! Just walk over to him and tell him!”

“What if I do it at the Yule Ball? Don’t you think that would be romantic?”

“Sure, whatever ends this conversation” George said, exasperated.

“George!” you glared at him.

“What do you want me to say?” he laughed.

“Okay, that’s fair” you sighed. “I’ll tell him at the Yule Ball. I’ve decided” you smiled.

“Brilliant” he smiled, trying to be supportive.

“Just, do me a favor?”

“What’s that, love?”

“Don’t tell Fred” you told him.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake!”

“George! I promise I will tell him!”

“Okay!”

“I’m not joking, George. You have to pinky promise me!”

“Fine!” he said, sticking out his pinky. “I pinky promise!”

“You know that this is bigger than an unbreakable vow, right?”

“How is this big than an unbreakable vow? If you break an unbreakable vow you die!”

“Yeah, but if you break my pinky promise, I will kill you in a much more painful way than any unbreakable vow ever could” you said staring at him dead in the eyes. “Got it, Weasley?” you asked, glaring at him and George tried to not look as nervous as he actually was.

“G-got it!”

To Be Continued

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

[Ch.1] [Ch.2] [Ch.3] [Ch.4]

A/N: ahhh so what do you think? part 6?! xD I think this story has two or three chapters tops left, depending on the inspo I have (if you have any suggestions for more, my inbox is always open :D)

tag list: @venomsvl @chaoticgirl04 @bubsonnobx @wanniiieeee @thebadassbitchqueen @crazylokonugget @elinalfrida @itsccc @getosugaru @bubsonnobx @egghasnoleg @kiwi5335 @staygoldsquatchling02​ @theanonymousloser​ @mxgvmiii​ @marimarvelfan​ @im-literally-just-trash @wordacadabra @ssophiebirkas @baker0703 @tisdawnseason @delfonicstheme-blog 

[diana-bluewolf]

I was taking screenshots of Chris sitting on a bench, and then Sebastian came and sat right on him. This chap has no clue about the concept of a private space, does he? Look how proud of himself he is XD

I couldn’t help writing a humorous drabble about it. 

Characters: Sebastian, Chris (MC), Ominis, Garreth.

Without ships except for Garreth x potions.

Stubborn

“There you are. Move over, by the way, you’re sitting in my spot.”

Chris, who had been reading a book on a bench outside the DADA classroom, raised his head. Sebastian stood over him. Chris glanced sideways at the vacant place right next to him and nodded towards it, arching his eyebrows.

"Nope," Sebastian said, "you took my seat, so you should be the one to move." 

“You have just made up this my-seat-thing, right?” Chris frowned, trying to remember at least one time when he had seen Sebastian sitting there. 

He didn't want to move - it was pretty cold, and his seat was warm and cosy only because he had been sitting there long enough. “We’re going to the classroom in a few minutes anyway, why all the fuss?” 

“All right then,” Sebastian said and, without further ado, took a seat on the other boy's lap matter-of-factly. 

“What the hell are you—” Chris broke off, quickly accepting the game rules, whatever it was. “Fine,” he simply brought out, casually turning to the next page of his book as if he were reading again. 

Sebastian had to admit - his plan had failed. Though initially, it had nothing to do with "his spot". He just needed to have a word with Ominis, who was sitting on the floor right beside Chris and who had been careless enough to spill the beans about some secret scriptorium yesterday. Since then, Sebastian hadn't missed any chance to speak with him and find out more, though to no avail.

Now, the idea to embarrass Chris so that he would leave didn't seem that good anymore. And even though the opportunity to talk with Ominis before the class had been ruined, there was no way back now. Sebastian was determined to get “his” seat, even if it meant sitting like this the entire day. Sooner or later, his opponent would get tired and flee the battlefield. 

Meanwhile, the opponent was thinking about the same tactic, still pretending to be engrossed by the book, yet his gaze was fixed on a single line. The line read, “Hippogriffs can be tamed, but they tend to be prideful and stubborn.” It didn’t help.

At the same time, Ominis was dwelling on the destiny of his eyes, which most certainly would be sore by the day's end due to their frequent rolling. He only hoped that his ocular muscles were strong enough already - after all, it was not the first day he knew these two.  

“Psst, Ominis,” he heard a whisper. Who did it belong to? Oh, right, Garreth Weasley. 

“Are they…dating? It’s not my business, but I kinda made a bet with Imelda, so—”

"Do you have a potion that could make me deaf?" Ominis interrupted him.

“Nuh-uh… At least not yet, but thanks for the idea!” Garreth’s eyes sparkled with enthusiasm. ”Why?”

“Because I’ve heard that question only once so far, but I know that I’m doomed to its perpetual recurrence from now on,” Ominis muttered, standing up. 

“If you are done acting like five-year-olds, it’s time to go to the classroom,” he said, addressing the bench beside him. 

Neither the bench nor the pair on it hadn’t even stirred. 

Perhaps it may have taught Sebastian and Chris a good lesson if Ominis had simply left now. He did not doubt that both of them were mulish enough to sit there for a whole day or even longer. But it was he who would be attacked with all the interrogation and gossip during that time. 

“Fine.” Ominis sighed, aiming his wand at Sebastian. “Wingardium Leviosa!” he said firmly and headed towards the classroom, Sebastian floating in the air behind him. 

“Oi! Ominis, put me down!” Sebastian protested. “It doesn’t count, you haven’t won!” he shouted to Chris.

“Sure, sure,” Chris drawled with a grin, following them. 

Ominis couldn’t help rolling his eyes again. What had he done so wrong in all his miserable life to deserve these two?

[thescholarlystrumpet]

I mean... you're doing a Rocky Horror Picture au. So....

"Transvestite", obviously! 😃 and if that's too obvious, I will throw out a GOAD staple and say "snex".

😘

Haha good thoughts but we actually haven't used the word "Transvestite" in the text yet... and I know without searching I've never used "snex" outside of chat XD (tho I can't speak for @hakunahistata)

but I will give you another snippet of Crowley playing MC:

He sauntered back to Sandwich and dangled a hand over her shoulder, fingers dipping into her deep cleavage. She swatted at him playfully.  

“Oi! Cheeky! That cost extra.” 

“Oops!” Crowley dragged out the vowel and popped the consonant as he swept the mic from her hand. “Was just tryna get this back, Sweet, so I can wrap us up. Everyone knows I’m the one to see about a happy ending.” Several people made wolf howl sounds and Crowley bent forward, hands to knees, creating what modest cleavage he could above the sequined corset top. He blew them a kiss then brought the mic back up. “Two victims—I mean Virgins—down and one left.”

He crossed back to Aziraphale and held a hand over the man’s groin, nowhere near touching but that wouldn’t matter. “What do you say, Transylvanians and other Degenerates? Should I pop this sexy librarian’s cherry? Right here on stage?”

There was a riotous reaction, mostly in the affirmative. 

Crowley winked at Aziraphale as he moved to stand in front of him, legs spread. He bent again at the waist and gave a little roll of the hips before snapping back up and shaking his forefinger at the crowd. “The fuck kinda show did you think this is? Bunch of absolute sex fiends. Ugh, I love it but we’re not licensed for that. I know, I know. The Donkey show is next door.” 

[tobiasdrake]

The Disappearance of Nagato Yuki-chan, Episode 3 - Haruhi Suzumiya!!

Despite my wishes for Yuki to be allowed to be happy, my character is here to fuck everything up and make everyone miserable. Let's go!

Given the lack of supernatural forces in this show, my money's on Love Triangle antagonist.

Oh thank Haruhi, she's still an asshole. Gonna be honest, the pleasant evening Yuki had with her last episode made me nervous that they'd sanded her edges off.

I'm still so nervous. I can feel her getting ready to create conflict.

She's here to get revenge against Yuki for stealing her God powers, by stealing Yuki's boyfriend. Who. Yuki. Also stole from her.

...okay so if Haruhi drowns Yuki in the nearest river it could reasonably be argued to be justified but I still don't wanna let her.

PROCESSING. PROCESSING. PROCESSING.

SYSTEM CRASH

This program has performed an illegal operation and had to be shut down.

You can take the girl out of the robot but you can't take the robot out of the girl.

"Sorry Haruhi but we don't have time to talk about aliens because we need to meet up with Ryoko Asakura."

The show did that on purpose. XD And I appreciate it.

She was going to kidnap Santa Claus! Not just meet him. She planned a full-on abduc--

Yo is that a bag of CEMENT!? Haruhi. Haruhi. I desperately need you to explain what the plan last night was.

Haruhi rejecting Yuki's gratitude on the grounds of, "Fuck you, I'm a selfish prick so you go ahead and take this credit for your personal achievement on yourself. The meanest possible way to build another person up.

This resonates with me so hard. Like. Actually, Haruhi's wrong. This is Individualist propaganda. It's okay to lean on others for support. Humans are social creatures.

But Haruhi's a selfish, violent misanthrope. She's young, stupid, and full of herself. So for her this is super endearing. I love that Haruhi gets soft moments but they're always filtered through the lens of Haruhi's personal shittiness.

HAHAHAHA It's okay I don't think she saw us HAHAHAHAHA

This show is so fucking good oh my god.

Every time I see Ryoko's cooking in closeup, I'm reminded of the fact that anime food must always, always be the most high-resolution incredible art imaginable. We don't want a repeat of the Bad Cabbage Incident that brought cultural shame to anime as a whole.

Thanks to badly drawn cabbage, drawing food so photorealistic that it ends up higher-quality than the animation around it is now a way of flexing in anime.

Oh shit, we're officially her friends.

It was a plot point in the Disappearance movie that Haruhi would have trouble getting in the school. Visibly wearing another school's uniform makes it clear that she's not supposed to be here.

How will Haruhi solve that problem this time around?

Fuck you, rules are fake. Anything is legal if you sprint fast enough.

XD I am so anxietous about my character being back in the show and yet so happy to see her. That's mah girl! She's here to make trouble!

Okay I said it before but.

I was worried last episode that they were sanding off Haruhi's edges. Making her nicer. Less shamelessly criminal. But no. This episode has put all of those concerns to rest.

Haruhi changed both herself and Itsuki into Kyon Gym Clothes Haruhi and Itsuki so fast I could practically hear her saying, "Oi! Kyon! We need to wardrobe-reference the movie so GIMME." In the movie, they had to wear Kyon's gym clothes because they were out in the streets trying to figure out a way to look inconspicuous with limited resources.

Here in the school building under no pressing urgency and with Haruhi's criminal proclivities, I feel like there were a million other ways they could blend in. They're doing this just because they did it in the movie.

Not a fan of that. For the last two episodes, the show's done a great job of blazing its own trail, which is what I like to see out of AU stories. While Haruhi shouting "Kyon! Gym clothes! Now!" so she can change into one of her other Movie Costumes feels inorganic and overly referential.

I love that Itsuki has taken Kyon's job of being Haruhi's luggage. And yet, there is an unmistakable flaw in Haruhi's approach. Well. Two flaws, given that the other is "This is not a magic world".

My bestie likes to feed birds on our balcony. They leave out a bowl of seed, and the birds come by and eat. They also leave peanuts for some of the larger birds like blue jays. Consequently, we have birds coming and going from our balcony all the time.

Our cat is very intrigued by this. During the day in spring and summer, he loves to go out on the balcony and hunt the birds. He can't wait to get his claws into a nice, juicy bird. The idea captivates him.

So we let him out onto the balcony and he hunts. By which I mean, he climbs up on the table and sits his ass next to the bowl. In plain sight. Supremely visible. And then he waits.

And waits.

And waits.

To date, he has never caught a bird. For some reason, the birds are reluctant to come to the balcony when a visible predator is sitting next to their food bowl. His enthusiasm is great, but he has produced a 0% success rate not because birds don't exist, but because birds will not approach under the conditions he creates.

That's her. That is Haruhi. She's dragging Itsuki around by the ear so that she can be nearby when he reveals his true secret nature. Failing to realize that he will never reveal his true secret nature (even if he still had one) so long as she is around to see it. That's what makes it secret.

Last night's Santa experiment is very much the same. Santa never sprang Haruhi's trap. But is that because Santa does not exist? Yes. But more importantly, even if he did exist, Santa would be unlikely to drop what he's doing to go to a random park just because some girl standing nearby wrote a message saying "HEY COME HERE I HAVE CAKE".

Haruhi's methodology needs a lot of work. Her self-absorption deprives her of the subtlety required to create an effective trap.

YUKI NO

DO NOT SURRENDER CONTROL OF YOUR CLUB LIKE THIS

You worked so hard for this. Do not let Haruhi take her powers back control of your club away from you!

Ryoko! RYOKO COME DO SOMETHING

Oh thank Haruhi, Ryoko is here to fuck up Haruhi. We're good. Everything's fine. That girl doesn't even go to our school. There is no way Lawful Menace is going to stand for this.

SHE STOOD FOR THIS WHAT THE FUCK

Ryoko no you were our last hope

I do admit, I'm interested to see where this is going to go. Ryoko didn't get to interact with Haruhi, like, at all back in the original show 'cause it was so Kyon-centric. And also 'cause she died moved to Canada.

I said before that I like it when AU stories go in new directions rather than trying to skew too close to the original source material, and letting Haruhi and Ryoko hang out is certainly a new direction.

(continued in reblog)