#And I know everyone is different but personally as an artist I hate when someone insults the thing I like enough to make fanart for

[infriga]

Just a small request to anyone who follows me or checks out my blog, please don't insult something I enjoy in the tags if you're going to reblog something about it from me that isn't already a critique.

[peapod20001]

When I love a song, I’ll love it forever

[recuira]

Buggy Headcanons ˗ˏˋ꒰🍒꒱ˎˊ˗

★ — OPLA Buggy the Clown ♡

﹢he's the type of guy to follow the "i hate everyone but you" trope. the second he sees you, his heart lights up and he drops everything he's doing to go talk to you, even just for a moment. he could be heated, yelling at his crew, but when he sees you, he smiles and drops everything until you leave.

﹢he's a sucker for cuddles. absolutely loves them. if he's had a long and stressful day, he'll just fall on top of you and pass out. he loves to lay on you. his head on your chest as he rub his back or play with his hair. he definitely snores. not too loud but not quiet either. sometimes it'll get loud and you'll need to wake him up to get some decent sleep x)

﹢both a morning/night person. he goes to bed late and wakes up early. he doesn't get too much sleep because of how busy he is. sometimes the only time he gets with you is when you're both in me. if he's not deathly tired, he'll lay on his side with his head propped up on his hand as he listens to you talk about your day. your voice soothes him.

﹢he's very insecure. lowkey hates himself. his ego is forced and a facade for others so he can intimidate them. he hates his nose. he hates the subject being brought up in any conversation. when he was younger, before meeting shanks, he would wear a mask to hide his nose.

﹢i know everyone is like "buggy is a sex god and dominant and-" no. sorry. he is extremely insecure. it took him a while to show you who he really was. he lets himself unfold with you. he is himself with you. his true self.

﹢the crossbones on his forehead and upper cheek are tattooed on but he paints his face with makeup. his eyelashes are naturally long but he does wear falsies to accentuate it and make himself look more like a clown. his hair is naturally long but he tends to tuck and pin it back underneath the striped bandana.

﹢he likes things to be equal during sex. no top or bottom. as cringe as it may sound, he loves to call it 'love-making'. no fucking or hooking up - rather making love with one another. he worships you, especially in the bedroom. constant kisses and praise. loves doing all of the work, especially if you're stressed out. his favorite position is when you're both laying down on your sides and your holding each other while he makes love to you.

﹢he's a strict believer in taking care of you. pays for meals, surprises you with presents, doesn't want you working- he wants you to be completely comfortable and satisfied. someone as special like you should never even lift a finger. he has it all covered.

﹢loves to let you do his makeup. sometimes he'll be reading the newspaper while you're painting his eyes or lips. it's like he's an actor and you're his makeup artist. he can never get the lines as precise and as neat as you can. once you're finished, he gives you a kiss on your cheek, leaving a red mark. this happens every time.

﹢he's a goofy drunk, very humorous and silly. but as he sobers up, he becomes extremely clingy and doesn't let go of you.

﹢in the public eye, he acts very possessive of you, like he's the one in control. he always needs to be touching you. if you're apart, he'll send a hand your way and hold yours while he's busy. preferably his off-hand so he can still get some work done.

﹢people are scared of him for obvious reasons but when it's just the two of you, he's a big baby. sometimes he'll even use a certain voice whenever he talks to you. you tease him in public, telling others he's a completely different person when you two are alone. he laughs, calls you crazy, and plays it off.

﹢he loves no one more than he loves you.

﹢whenever he performs a show, he always gets you a seat up front. makes sure you can kick your feet up, your popcorn is always full, and you're enjoying yourself. whenever he pulls someone up on the set to help with one of his acts, you're almost always the person he picks.

﹢his favorite moments with you are when you're sitting on the deck of his ship, everyone else is asleep, and the two of you are counting the stars together and admiring one another.

﹢he loves to eat. if you two are eating together, he'll ask for the rest of yours and then some. messy eater, too.

﹢he's a great listener. loves to hear about your day.

﹢he loves to give you massages. just loves to pamper you, in general. your feet will be kicked up on his lap as he rubs them and you vent about your day or your laying on your back and he's above you, massaging your shoulders and hips.

﹢he just loves you. and he is a sweet and delicate man so treat him like one. he's the type of guy to sacrifice the world for you, not you for the world.

[suniverseastro]

ASTROLOGY OBSERVATION #14

Mars in the 2nd house is very possessive

Moon Aquarius is easy to sympathize with those around, although they may have many bad qualities, they will often be ignored by people because of their support in the team. Some in this group when they don't like someone and hate openly can easily recognize their feelings, these people can play bad tricks like using crowds, councils to bully

Here are some of the positions that I don't like very much, doesn't mean they will all be the same and I hate everyone with this aspect, it just brings some difficulties and disadvantages, takes a lot of time time to recognize and transform it:

1. Moon Square/Opposite Pluto: often emotionally volatile and explosive, has difficulty controlling anger, may experience more bad luck with women

2. Moon square / Opposite Uranus: actually this is one of the most horrible corners for me because as far as I know and actually it means about their separation from the mother physically or mentally

3. Venus square/opposite Mars: causes sexual attraction but often changes partners too quickly and gets nowhere

4. Mars Libra: passive in problem solving. The house in this position plays an important role, like the one who moves the pieces tactically. I think it is necessary to add other angles to strengthen this position, especially Pluto to increase ambition and determination.

5. Venus Gemini: often emotional, easy to play emotional roller coaster with others, unpredictable, interesting, but for me this is not a very good position in love, they easily find it difficult. hard to find the right person

6. Moon square/Opposite Saturn: often encounters problems in childhood such as abandonment, working in a difficult, deprived environment, shouldering responsibility, loneliness; They have quite a lot of psychological damage, rarely share, confide, and find it difficult to open their hearts to others. When they learn to be less strict with themselves and learn to accept and love themselves, the door in their souls will lead them to the good things that are waiting for them on the other side of their hearts.

7. Venus square/opposite Uranus: feel less interested in wanting a relationship Some positions I like:

Moon trine/sextile Pluto: I once wished to have this aspect because it gives the ability to read other people's psyches and understand emotions deeply and they themselves also have a protective covering for their minds. mine

Sun trine/sextile Pluto: have their own privilege in society, they can be people whose image others consider as an authority and important figure, admire; Their passion is strong and they will try to do it

Mercury conjunct/ trine/ sextile Neptune: they have acumen, speciality and development in language, can know 2 or more languages, have artistic abilities, their voices are quite cute

Venus trine/sextile Mars: they easily radiate sexual attraction to other people (regardless of gender), which makes it easier for them to have relationships

Ascendant trine/sextile/conjunct Mercury: usually curious, cheerful, child-like eager people, they often have an active, playful appearance.

Ascendant trine/sextile/conjunct Sun: confident, shine, positive energy

Moon in Sagittarius/9th: very active, cheerful, likable, open and optimistic, they respect others and different cultures and religions

Mercury in Gemini: funny people, lots of topics to talk to, easy to talk to anyone, except people they don't like

Mercury conjunct/trine/sextile Pluto: their voice has charm, weight, usually straight to the point, analytical, inquisitive and rarely afraid of knowledge and reason

Moon sextile Venus: cute girls and boys, graceful words, pleasant, non-aggressive, cohesive and peaceful

(a position can't say who you are, everything will change, maybe for the better, maybe for the worse) try to take a deep breath and try to feel the peaceful moment in the present

Thank you everyone for inspiring me to write articles on this topic. Thank you for your love for me; love you all. Wishing you all good health, peace and luck ⭐

[thisismeracing]

Ex | MS47

SOCIAL MEDIA AU

Pairing: black!singer!reader (she/her) x mick schumacher

Warnings: curse words, Twitter environment, breakup, mention of food, pregnancy, it's not proofread, etc etc. Minors DNI!

summary: Y/n and Mick used to be the golden couple in the paddock, that's why the internet went wild when they announced their breakup. Imagine how they reacted when Y/n dropped a song about not wanting to be his ex. Would the couple have any hope in getting back together?

a/n: none of the pictures used are mine, they are all from Pinterest and other apps. everything else is made up by me and I do not give permission for it to be published on a different platform. I would appreciate it if those things could be taken into consideration 💛

my masterlist | my taglist

yourusername

liked by dualipa, mercedesamgf1, and others

yourusername New song is out 🖤 Hope you guys like it!

view all 19,976 comments

schumicedes This feels like such a personal song, it gave me chills!

⤷ yn1990 It's like she recorded a voice message for him and then dropped it as a song.

f1sainzito I still can't believe they broke up, I'm still mourning their relationship

⤷ charleslechair1 I bet they will get back after this song lol

ynprincess I love her but this cover feels so...weird, idk, like it's rushed

⤷ mickeyn someone made a thread on twitter explaining it a bit, but it's basically a picture mick took of her, she wanted to make her message clear and that's why it's so artistically beautiful, it goes beyond the aesthetic

jorjasmith you’re so brave and pure, Ily!❤️❤️

winteryn Yn wanting to be friends with her ex, meanwhile I literally changed cities so I wouldn't see mine again

⤷ cruelsummer1 that's why I feel like they like gave themselves time, not really broke up fr, and now they realize it was not the best idea because they literally love each other.

dojacat Don't make me miss my ex, yn!!!! ☠️

woffantastic NOT THE MERCEDES ADMIN LIKING IT

mickschumacher

liked by georgerussell63, mercedesamgf1, and others

mickschumacher ⛰️

comments on tihs post have been limited

ynandschumi I wanted to comment something but I just know it will be deleted, so I'm just gonna say: you guys look good, hope you enjoyed your hike!❤️ also Angie seems a bit sad without her mother doesn't she....................

⤷ mercedessummer bestie, you did not LMAO

lewishamilton Roscoe says he's mad he was not invited!

mickschum90 I love you, mick!

sunandstarsyn This does not give happiness vibe...

dailycelebsupdate

liked by wonderfulyn and others

dailycelebsupdate We woke up this morning to the leaking of Y/n Y/l/n’s baby shower. The singer spent a little over a year off the radar after her breakup with F1 star Mick Schumacher, only to show up now pregnant! Who are we betting on to be the baby daddy?

view all 10,467 comments

ynlove we aint betting a thing, and stop saying “only to show up” as if these pics were posted intently, they were LEAKED. Respect Y/n’s right to her privacy!

sainzsunny I hated the fact that the leaked something that she did not want people to know, but my bet would be that she and Mick are back together since that song release 🤐

mickeyf1 You guys are disgusting

swiftieyln She lookes so peaceful, glowing and everything 😭

⤷ ynhundreds that because she was being able to keep her private life to herself.

f1gossipupdates

liked by user90, and others

f1gossipupdates Is everyone thinking the same thing?

view all 9,789 comments

schumacher47 Is leaking season? Wtf the wrong, why cant celebs have their privacy??

⤷ f1khalid especially Mick, he’s really open about how he likes to have his personal life respected. 😔

ynstars BABY SCHUMACHER ON ITS WAY!!!

hockeyf1d They MARRIED???!!!

ynbrasil I just know Yn will be pissed when she open her socials to this shitshow

yourusername and mickschumacher

liked by mercedesamgf1, estebanocon, and others

yourusername It's been a long ride and we wanted to share with you guys in a different way, the circumstances, however, did not help, so we are sticking to the good ol' Instagram announcement. We got married last year and decided to keep living in our particular heaven, I hope you guys don't get this the wrong way because we love the love and support some of you give us, but Mick and I needed to bask in our own love without interruptions or assumptions. This love grew bigger than us and it will be walking around the world in a couple of months. We appreciate our friends' discretion, and our fans' love, we see you and we love you. We hope you guys can respect our privacy and our wishes on keeping some details to ourselves. Love, Mick and Yn Schumacher

view all 34,572 comments

ynweeknd SHE SIGNED AS YN SCHUMACHER OMGGGGG

schumickeyf1 "This love grew bigger than us and it will be walking around the world in a couple of months" PLEASE IM SO LONELY THIS IS A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF ROMANTIC

mickschumacher Forever, mrs. Schumacher ❤️

⤷ yourusername forever and some more, my love 💗

charles_leclerc omg thank goodness you guys told everyone, I was so scared I would let it slip

⤷ lechair16 Charles ☠️☠️ LMAO

lewishamilton you guys deserve all the happiness in this world 🤍

ynandmick I was right and nature is healing

twentyoneyns So let me get this clear, my ex gives me a reason to go to therapy, while Y/n's ex gives her a ring, then all the love and orgasms in the world, and then a baby??????????? God definitely has its favorites.

⤷ schumercedes not the orgasms 🗣🗣 HAHAHAHAHAH

ynandmickey MOTHER AND FATHER

⤷ popyn Literally

mercedesamgf1 We already have a spot for them 💜

sunnydaysyln Are we calling the baby schumini or minimacher? or baby schumi? or macherbaby?

⤷ yourusername HAHAHAHHA I love them all

********************

If you liked it, make sure to like and reblog <3 feel free to talk to me as well, my inbox is always open!

I will start a taglist on my posts, to be part of it you just gotta comment/send an ask saying so, and most important: have your age in your profile (I don’t interact with minors!). See you guys next story! <3

[penncilkid]

Been thinking about my experiences as a POC within fandom while also being an artist and how much that sucks sometimes. This is primarily in regards to the Redacted fandom, but could be applied to any other fandom honestly.

Proper "fussing" under the cut (for those who would rather not see):

Sometimes, I really stop and think about what it must be like to be a white person in fandom, especially when you're an artist. To see yourself reflected in the spaces you exist in all the time. There are some exceptions to this, of course. For example, lack of body diversity is just as much of a problem in my opinion (Like fat people exist. Disabled people exist. Fat, disabled people exist. You can draw them, y'know? /rhet) But generally speaking, it's not difficult to find designs that probably look like you. There will be blondes, brunettes, redheads even— It's everywhere you look.

I don't think most people realize how isolating that ends up feeling though.

Because it's not just the fact that most of the art/designs you'll stumble upon won't resemble you. It's the fact that the prevalence dictates how everyone else interacts with fandom too.

Do you know how much it sucks seeing a post saying "So we all agree that Asher's blonde, right?" and knowing that most people are thinking of a white guy and nothing else?

Or noticing how Alexis, a generally "hated" character in the fandom, is the only vampire most people are willing to make visibly brown?

How about the fact that Gavin, the "thrilling" and "sexy" incubus, has so many black and brown designs— But I can count the non-white Lasko designs I've come across on my hand?

People can do whatever they want. I've said it before, and I'll continue to repeat it when I make these rambles. If you want to make every single design you have varying shades of white and never stray from that, that's your prerogative. But for the love of god, I wish I didn't feel like I was fucking crazy for talking about how much that shit sucks to see as a person of color.

On top of that, do you know how frustrating it is to watch white artists get praised for generic diversity when POC artists have been consistently bringing forth such compelling, stunning designs to table? Like I see the kind of shit that gets praised in this fandom and what doesn't. Racial ambiguity or the slightest addition of a curl gets treated like it's revolutionary— And that's only if it's the "correct" character. It has to "make sense", right? The same way Sam has to have sun-kissed, golden skin even after he's been turned, or the way Guy has to be white because there's no way someone with that personality could be anything but.

Do you know what it's like to be filled with such a sense of joy because someone made a design where a character had your skin tone or hair texture or facial feature? Like, I genuinely have a strong reaction whenever I find a black or brown design in this fandom because they're so rare in comparison to everything else. And when I really stop to think about that, I realize how fucked up of a phenomenon that is.

I love the designs that I've made, but I've also noticed which ones "do better" comparably. I don't change much of anything with how I go about posting or promoting them. The only difference is that some of them fit what is considered widely "canon" in fandom. And the others... don't. I go out of my way to make every design POC in some regard, and you can usually tell visually even without the addition of colors. I'm not gonna stop doing that because I know why I started in the first place. But fuck, it does start to hurt seeing white artists with the same general white designs get hyped up endlessly while I internally debate if I should even make another character look like me or not. If it'll even matter to anyone but me.

Some days, I just really wish it didn't feel like shit being black in this fandom. I hate knowing that I'm gonna post this, and I'll probably get responses for other people of color primarily.

But maybe putting this out will help that pill get easier to swallow.

[blubushie]

What are the things you Like and Dislike about Sniper? (Valve's Sniper and the fans' interpretation of Sniper)

I've got no issue with canon Sniper and love canon Sniper. I'm so sorry anon, you've woken the dog. Ignore me as I proceed to bark angrily for the next half-hour, because I have many issues with fanon Sniper.

But first I'll start with what I like about fanon Sniper. I love how everyone has their own little twist to him, even if most I don't agree with. I love how I can see how authors and artists have interacted with people and the scope of experiences they've heard about off how they write Sniper. I like that I can make judgements on people off how they treat his character (not in a "they make bad things happen to him" kinda way, but in a "how does this person handle Sniper's being adopted" kinda way). I like that I can use Sniper as a looking glass into the author/artist. I'm sure this applies to other characters too, but looking through Sniper just comes easier to me because I suppose I can put myself in his shoes? Iunno.

Now that that's over with, please allow your actual resident bushman and professional sniper to get on his soapbox, thank you.

List of shit I hate about fanon Sniper:

Fandom constantly referring to him as a Kiwi, completely ignoring his entire character arc in the comics where he realises that he is in fact Australian and that the two people who raised him all his life are in fact his "real" parents. The fandom needs to re-assess how they view adoptees/migrants and their relationship to their adopted culture, especially when they show no interest in assimilating into their birth culture and have no knowledge/experience of it. This is such an issue to me that I, someone who emigrated to Australia when I was two years old and grew up Australian despite being born in another country, will just outright block people who call Sniper a Kiwi cuz I already know how you're going to see and view me before we even get to talking.

I don't like how half the fandom twinkifies him. There I said it. On the other hand, I don't like the other half of the fandom often makes him very muscular. Do you not know what lean muscle looks like?

I don't like how the fandom calls him "stinky" or says he's unhygienic. None of the fandom understands how well animals can smell and how much of a successful hunt depends on animals not being able to smell you. You know what makes animals flee fastest? The smell of smoke and the smell of human body odour. If you're upwind of your target they are going to smell you and flee. Sniper, professional hunter for yonks, would not fucken stink considering it'd make him a completely useless hunter. He'd shower daily, wear scent cover (NOT deodorant--Sniper would not smell good, he just would not have a scent at all). Also none of the fandom understands how important hygiene is in the bush. Sniper is not walking around covered in dirt and such. He would be very clean and practise good hygiene because if you don't stay clean you end up smelly (ruining his chances of a successful hunt) and/or end up sick--especially with skin problems.

I don't like how the fandom has generally accepted out-of-characters traits as canon. For example, Sniper being "shy". Reclusive DOES NOT EQUAL SHY. He's a fucken assassin, does the fandom not understand how that works? Shy people do not get hired. No one is going to hire a hitman who's quaking in his boots because a client looked at him a little too long or applied a little too much social pressure. Sniper would be more than capable of blending into his surroundings when needed, such as a crowd, if it means making his hit or getting where he needs to go to make said hit. Sniper would be capable of lying to cover his arse on the spot and making it believable. Sniper would be able to manage being flirted with in public and play it off cooly--though privately is a different matter, so go wild with that all you like. There is a major difference between someone not caring for the company of other people and someone who gets shy or nervous around them. Professionals have standards, and Sniper would keep his shit together for the sake of getting his mark.

He wouldn't smoke cannabis. Whether it's because he just doesn't care for the high, whether it's because it doesn't do much for him, whether it's because THC in particular makes him anxious (you know that man is paranoid, all hitmen are)--the bottom line is that the smoke of cannabis clings to your clothes like nothing else, it takes forever to get the smell out, and yeah sure you can mask it with other smells but the issue is that Sniper, as a hunter, cannot be smelt by anything he's hunting. And you know what scent cover DOESN'T conceal? Cannabis. (Sauce: I have tried.) I could defo see him doing edibles though. But why do you think he's doing shrooms, ay? Because shrooms don't leave a smell.

None of the fandom knows how sniping actually works. Just. At all. I've seen horrendous fucking takes. He is not "feeling it." He is not cracking off a shot at 1200yd a second after taking aim. That's not how this works, that's not how any of this works. DO ANY OF YOU KNOW WHAT ELEVATION OR WINDAGE IS?

Sniper would not be bothered by the cold. A camper has SO LITTLE INSULATION (I live in one!!) and the outback gets BELOW FREEZING AT NIGHT IN WINTER. Sniper would be well-adjusted to handling extreme temperatures at BOTH ENDS of the temperature range. He might be a little more susceptible to cold because he's experienced less of it, but he would not be shivering at fucking 15c/60f. It's also fucken cold during the day in winter because it's the outback and there's no trees to trap the heat in. Temperatures fluctuate wildly, and bushmen need to be highly adaptable or you die.

Not Sniper-specific but the fandom also doesn't understand jack shit about weapons. You clean them after you use them. That's not a clip, it's a MAGAZINE--yes there is a difference. YOU ARE NOT PUTTING A DIRTY SWORD INTO ITS SCABBARD. That's not how revolvers work. No, that either. That's a double-action, you don't have to cock the hammer to fire it. That's a single-action, you do need to cock the hammer to fire it. Bolt-action rifles don't have hammers. You don't rack a bolt, you cycle it, you rack a slide on a semiautomatic pistol or a pump-action shotgun. I'm hitting you with my old man bitching cane.

Continuing from the above point: people who draw Sniper with his finger on the trigger of his rifle/any firearm when he should not have finger on the trigger of a firearm. YOU ONLY PUT YOUR FINGER ON THE TRIGGER WHEN YOU ARE READY TO SHOOT. TRIGGER DISCIPLINE, PEOPLE. IT SAVES LIVES.

Most of the fandom has no idea what the fuck they're talking about or doing with this bloke (or his job, or lifestyle, or where he comes from) and it shows. There, I said it.

[filmofhybe]

a song from me to you

pairing : park jeongseong x reader Genre : Producer x singer , angsty , ex to lovers , fluff warnings : swearing , kissing 1196 words

a/n : been thinking about producer Jay after he was listed in the credit of sweet venom. So proud of my boy and I hope this comeback would be a success as always!!

> masterlist of all my work

© filmofhybe on tumblr — do not copy , translate or share.

Y/n Y/l/n, a talented singer-songwriter who had a gift for pouring her heart and soul into her music, creating songs that resonated deeply with listeners. Y/n’s career had taken off when she met Jay, a skilled producer who believed in her talent and helped shape her sound.

Y/N and Jay not only shared a professional relationship but also a romantic one. They were deeply in love, and their connection fueled their creative collaborations. Jay is always willing to guide y/n through during recording, praising her from time to time like a good boyfriend he is. Staying up late just to produce songs that are now top hits of hers, supporting her through everything. Both of them were so thankful for each other.

However, as time went on, the pressures of the industry and their personal lives began to strain their relationship. As time goes on, both of them eventually realize their ideas aren’t colliding together anymore, nothing seems to be working between them. As stress and disagreements starts involving constantly, they decided to part ways both personally and professionally. Leaving piles of unfinished lyrics and production behind.

After their broke up, Y/N had written a poignant song for Jay, a heartfelt tribute that mirrored the love they once shared. But she had never released it, believing that without Jay's production, the song wouldn't reach its full potential. It remained hidden away, a secret piece of her heart.

“So have you ever have a song you wanted to release so badly but just can’t?”

Currently, an interviewer is asking y/n about the unreleased song during an interview.

“yeah. I always will have. And it will always be that song.”

“And why’s that..?”

“I wrote it for someone, or should I say ex now. I scrapped it, not because it wasn’t nice or it brought bad memories. Is just I think without him helping me produce it, it just won’t be the same as my other songs. And it just won’t hit different.”

Y/N poured her heart out, explaining that she hadn't released it because she felt it needed Jay's touch to truly capture its essence.

“I feel like I know who it is…”

“I think everyone knows. He really means the absolute world to me. I’m just mad the industry broke us apart.”

“If you guys ever cross path again, would you release it?”

“Absolutely. 100% actually. Because this song can imply with anyone if you are still so In love with that person your no longer with.”

Upon hearing y/n’s words, Jay found himself overwhelmed with emotions. He realized the depth of Y/N's feelings and the impact their collaboration had on her music. They realized none of their music would be perfect without each other. They both needed each other without realizing it until one spoke up. Filled with hope, Jay decided to reach out to y/n, hoping to rekindle their relationship and artistic partnership.

A few days passed, y/n was initially surprised by Jay's contact

“Hey I saw your interview.. it was really meaningful.”

“haha thank you..”

“I know it’s about me. I’m willing to risk everything I’m currently doing just to work with you again. Not just work but to continue our love again. You don’t understand I only work best with you.”

“I know.. you’re the only person that gets me. If I’m being honest with you, my songs aren’t the even close to being the best without your producing. I hate how we thought us separating was a good decision.”

“Baby you know I’ll always wait for you, for you to reach out once again. So I can produce more songs and memories with you.”

“Then what are you waiting for? Come over tomorrow I miss you too much..”

they both took some time to reflect on their past and the love they shared. After careful consideration, she decided to give it another chance. She believed in their connection and the magic they created together.

A few days later, Y/N and Jay found themselves back in the studio, working side by side once again. There was a renewed sense of purpose and understanding between them, having grown individually during their time apart. They poured their hearts into their music, creating an atmosphere of creativity and passion. The studio was once again filled with laughter, pictures and Polaroids of each other, kissing and cuddling section through out, and jay’s praises filled the air once again.

“Baby you’re doing really good, I just need your voice to be more high pitch there alright? You’re doing a good job baby girl.”

“Ugh imma die from all these notes your telling me to do..”

“The other producers must be going easy on you because I ain’t, now focus.”

“Kisses for reward?”

“Always my love..”

“You know you’re so good at producing sometimes is scary.”

“And you’re so good at writing lyrics it scares me sometimes.”

“Stop making me Flattered” I mumbled against his neck. Arms wrapped around his neck as I cuddle into his lap. Watching him focus on fixing the track.

“I’m not I’m just being serious love, you’re really good at it.. the lyrics are beautiful. I can’t believe this song is about me and I’m producing it.” As jay looks at you with much adoration in his eyes

“Everything about you is beautiful that’s why the lyrics are always. And with you producing it, it makes it ten times more better!” You laughed and before you know it jay kisses you deeply before mumbling a small “thank you” against your lips.

And finally, the day arrived when Y/N felt ready to share the song she had written for Jay with the world. Titled "A Song from Me to You," it was a beautiful testament to their love and the journey they had been through. Y/N's heartfelt lyrics, combined with Jay's personal touch as a producer, made the song truly extraordinary. She was so thankful for Jay, so grateful that she can finally share this song she once scrapped to the word.

When "A Song from Me to You" was released, it made waves in the music industry. Listeners were captivated by the raw emotion and the undeniable chemistry between Y/N's vocals and Jay's production. The song struck a chord with people from all walks of life, touching their hearts and reminding them of the power of love. After a year of hard work, the song was now a top hit once again.

Y/N and Jay's reunion not only brought them personal happiness but also propelled their careers to new heights. The success of "A Song from Me to You" opened doors for more collaborations, making more memories in the future, loving each other and them continuing to create music that resonated deeply with their fans. Y/n and Jay's journey was a reminder that sometimes, second chances can lead to beautiful outcomes, both personally and professionally.

And I was delighted to know that jay and the world can hear the lyrics of “a song from me to you.”

taglist : @surefornext @spilled-coffee-cup @skepvids @amymyli @in-somnias-world @okjaeminn @nonotwice1 @thinkmyg @blubbfsh

Reblog , comment or dm to be on my perm taglist !

networks : @k-films @k-neighborhood @k-labels @kflixnet

[thisliminalspacedaydreams]

Do not confuse Enthusiasm with Entitlement.

Hello!

I’m relatively unknown in the fanfiction world which is great, but I’ve got some friends who are known, and I’ve got things to say, from an outsider perspective.

I’m a writer, but I’m also a reader. I participate in the fandom in the way I know how, which is through writing stories.

Here’s what fandom should be. It’s a village, called Fandom, and people all interact in the village in some way. Write, Art, Ideas, Comments, Reblogs, Kudos, Podfics, Bookbinding, Etc etc etc. It’s a Smurf village, because currency doesn’t exist, and everyone does what they can for the community to thrive, for fucking free. They offer gifts, and encouragement, and once a week we all gather round in the center of the village and scream about it in a very unhealthy way. Some people are more active than others, some like to be known, some prefer to remain anonymous, some watch from the sidelines and everything is done with care and a warm heart between our teeth.

There are pockets of that, which, great.

Here’s what fandom is, sometimes.

1/People elevating others to the point of God, sometimes dragging other writers down (for no reason, no one asked to be rated as the best fic writer of all time) to make a point. What is the point? Is there one?

2/People harassing writers for more things. Write an epilogue, write another chapter, write this and that. Writers aren’t your own personal AI machine to make what you want to write. A lot is blamed on age, and perhaps there is an element to it, but I believe it’s just decency. An 18 years old kid is capable of making sensible decisions, just like a 24 years old, just like a 14 years old. Your age doesn’t give you a passe-droit to be a dick to people you admire (!!!???!)

3/I won’t even touch on the subject of hate reading because that’s just straight up insanity.

But it’s just… hate and tantrums and anger breeds more hate and tantrums and anger. There isn’t a virtuous way out of that, and I’d love for people to…just, cater to a more positive experience for everyone.

When your fingers are typing rot on your computer, you are venomizing everything that it touches: the people who will read it AND the people who will respond to it.

So far, from what I have seen, this behaviour leads to only one thing: depressed writers/artists/etc who stop writing/drawing/etc, or pull their work, or take breaks, or retreat from the limelight because it is too much.

You are pushing too much.

Enthusiasm is wonderful. It’s a powerful tool and should be used, everyone on this fandom is posting because we looked at The Thing and thought, “yeah.” No one in the history of the world (I hope) has posted after thinking “that is straight up shit and I hate it with a passion.”

Enthusiasm does need to be curated in a healthy way. I understand that Fandom is for fans, but it is also by fans. No one here is better, everyone here is different.

Some writers have a voice that resonate with more people, or stories that resonate with more people, and that is perfectly fine, but, once again for the people in the back, do not confuse Enthusiasm with Entitlement.

In what universe, in what galaxy do you believe complaining about someone’s work will make them go “oh right, nevermind all the work I put into this thing I love, let me just do the thing a random stranger is asking me to do.”

Do not confuse Enthusiasm with Entitlement.

Maybe I sound like bitch, but by god, the shit I’ve heard from my “popular” friends the past few months is absolutely mad. Mad, people.

You are normal people, and SO ARE THEY.

They have lives and interests and they are people. Treat them as such.

Do not confuse Enthusiasm with Entitlement.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk, I hope everyone enjoys Le Mange Dieu et le Dévoreur de Mondes, which we wrote and enjoyed writing, and which does not mean other writers weren't doing their own thing and writing other stuff in the meantime, and I HOPE we can all start to have some fucking respect for the people who spend hoursdaysweeksmonths pouring over a project and posting it for fucking free, all at once, so it’s not stressful for the reader. YOU.

Because against all fucking odds, we actually care about our readers. When you’re being nice.

Thank you and good day from a Fandom Elder.

[shygirl4991]

Chapter 2 Artistic Ringmaster

Art done by @alianarepasa do not repost Summary:  After the event of Splits into Three everything felt like things were back to normal, that is until Three’s boyfriend kicks down his front door announcing he has fallen under the same spell he did. Together they will learn the secret of the cherry potion and with SMG4 splits put an end to the evil gang's plan.  Sequel to Split into Threes Last Chapter Next Chapter

Tags: Fluff, Angst, Comedy, Romance, action and adventure

SMG4 sits there wide eyed at the story, Producer nods taking notes trying his best to take all the information in. Four gets up looking at his boyfriends face, now that he was told the story he started to see the difference in Three’s appearance. He gently touches Three’s face “You do look softer with a bit of sharpness…so the reason you really were pink was because I was talking to your heart. Heh explains why you seemed so open, I was literally talking to your emotions haha!” 

Four starts to do a panic laugh, Producer gets up and holds on to Fours arm “It’s okay original, i know…it's scary since if we mess up we lose everything but T-three did it so maybe we can to?” Four turns looking at his personality studying his appearance. This is what he acts like when those thoughts take over, the sleepless night and panic that his next video won't be perfect. The thought causes an image to flash in his mind.

“IT’S GOTTA BE PERFECT!”

He stands up straight holding his breath while Producer holds his head “Ah OH GOD!” Three panics running over to the personality to make sure he was okay.  He talks gently to the personality helping him relax before turning to his main boyfriend “Hey uh..everything okay you both just freaked the hell out.” Four opens his mouth to answer only to be interrupted  by a cheering crowd, they all turn confused as the crowd gets louder. Then they hear a voice “WELCOME EVERYONE TO THE MAIN EVENT I RINGMASTER 4 SHALL BRING YOU A SHOW YOU WONT FORGET!”

Three and Four exchange a look before running out of the castle, where they saw a huge stage was set up in the middle of the showgrounds. On the stage was a red SMG4 dress like a showman, he smirks at the crowd as he tips his top hat and twirls his cane “Remember folks like what you see then like, comment and subscribe to my amazing channel!”  He hits a button making the cannons on the stage shoot out youtube pillows with the channel link on them. Three catches one and stares at the pillow, his face going blank “I see..you have a showman personality, why am i not surprised.” Four blushes as he watches the personality doing tricks. It was impressive how resourceful this personality was, any mistake he made he just twirled his cane and went with the flow of it making it into a joke.  SMG4 walks closer to the stage, red eyes looking right at him “Ah a shame i must end the show folks, it seems the main character of the story is here and needs me!” the crowd boos and starts leaving the showground, he jumps off the stage with a flourish “Ah Chang Noi! Happy to see you will be with us on this journey. I see producer is here,” Producer does a small wave as he anxiously messes with a page of his notepad. 

Ringmaster smiles at them as Three stands there confused as to what the personality called him, Four lets out an awkward smile offering his hand “um nice to meet you?” the showman chuckles as he shakes SMG4 hand “Pleasure i'm Ringmaster your Imaginative side!” Producer scoffs “More like a walking Ego.” The comment surprises Three as he turns to see the personality pouting as Ringmaster glares at him, Four notices looking at the two worried “um is everything alright with you two?” Ringmaster walks up to Producer and lightly smacks his back “We are fine! Producer isn't wrong…I may be labeled as egocentric but that isn't all I am!”  SMG3 nods hearing the annoyed tone dripping from Ringmaster. Seems something Four hates more than anything is someone pointing out his ego, shame they weren’t rivals this would have been a gold mine of information. SMG4 lets out an awkward chuckle “I mean I may have had one when I was younger but there is no way I have a huge ego now right?” he turns to his boyfriend who was standing next to  Producer. They both blink at him before they exchange a look, Three gives a small smile “You uh have gotten better…you know till you decide to be an asshole about things,” Four’s eyes go wide. Then he and Ringmaster both put their hands on their hips and in sync yell “When the hell were we assholes?!” Four blushes as Three points to his cafe “My opening?”

Four bites his lip as Ringmaster chuckles “Please we explained to you, it’s what we do, we tease and fight only now is it wrong to do since you became our corazón!” Three facepalms feeling a headache grow as he talks to the red personality. He just wished something would happen to get everyone on track to the mission of finding all the splits, they were so close just one more and they could try to figure out what's wrong with Four. SMG4 stared at the cafe frowning as he remembered how he took things too far, could it be he has been blind to the way he treats others. He could feel eyes on him, turning, Producer was looking at him, eyes glowing. He could feel a flutter of anxiety grow in him ‘what if i'm not good enough for SMG3’  with that thought he turned away fast only to catch the sight of purple running around the cafe. 

Producer noticed SMG4  looking at something and followed his line of sight to catch a glimpse of someone , slowly he started to walk over to the spot. Seeing this Four walks after him leaving Ringmaster and Three to fight, they get closer and get hit with a strong smell of paint. That's when he saw himself in purple, he had his tongue out and was covered in paint. Looking closer he had a sweater tied around his waist and like ringmaster the hat was different it was beret. He was humming as he moved the brush on the wall of Three’s cafe, he wasn't sure what to say given how lost in his world the personality seemed. Three noticing the pair left he walked over “WHAT THE HELL WHO IS PAI-,” he freezes as the artistic personality turns looking into Three’s eyes.

His eyes flicked violet as he stared at the man in front of him, looking around and noticing what was going on he laughed “OH! You found me haha sorry about that. I was feeling a bit sketchy today haha get it?!” he winked at the crew making Three’s face go red. The purple personality fixes his hat “Well hello everyone im Artist! Without me SMG4 wouldn't be so creative and funny, ah speaking off your cafe needed a little something Mcdreamy so i painted dead memes on your walls to celebrate you!” 

Three looked at the mural and gasp “Terrance…you painted Terrance and the others on the wall..” his eyes watered. Four smiles softly wrapping his arm around his boyfriend for comfort “Thanks Artist.” He nods, pleased to see that he managed to make their partner smile, Ringmaster looks at the art and scoffs “You really think this can bring attention?” Artist glares at him “Remember your place red, you think you can do half of what you do without my humor?” Producer was panicking and grabbed onto SMG3 for comfort. SMG4 lets out a chuckle “So this is what you went through with your three huh?”

SMG3 frowns watching the fight, his splits never acted like this. They all acted like siblings since they all seemed to get along, that's when he remembered something Book told him, making him wrap his arms around Four and Producer. He sighs “Hey scrub…are you doing okay?” his boyfriend gave him a confused look, Three looked at Ringmaster and Artist fighting about making content stressing out Producer “Four, these guys are you. Looking at the three of them they can't stand each other, it's okay if you need to talk to someone about what's going on in your head but you can't brush aside that none of your personalities like each other!” 

Four shakes his head “I’m fine three, now we have to all get along and this will be done shouldn't be hard!”

Ringmaster smacks Artist with his cane making the purple personality growl “All right you egomaniac, you may think the world is all about you but SMG4 needs us!” Ringmaster chuckles “Cute you call our Original by his name, must be nice to be liked.” Three was hearing the conversation and it clicked, he accepted Spade and Book easy that is until heart came into the picture. He almost killed his emotions, Four seems to be having a hard time accepting these parts of him. Letting out a sigh he lets go of four and turns to producer “Hey PD i need to know something, is something holding you three back?”  

Producer looks down “I…he..” seeing the personality was going to break down he takes a step back and comforts him “Whoa okay its fine PD was just making sure.”  Four eye twitches hearing the fighting, taking a deep breath he walks towards Ringmaster “Look I do understand you're a part of me, it's just hard to process everything. Let's just relax and figure this all out.” He gives them a sheepish smile then shows a meme on his phone hoping to stop the pair from fighting. The pair exchange looks and sigh after watching the video, Four wasn't sure what the reaction meant but was pleased to see the fighting had stopped. 

Three gentle touches the pins on his overalls thinking, this wasn't going to be a one day thing. There was something his boyfriend isn't telling him, whatever it is seems to be making it hard for his personality to connect. He stands there thinking about what the missing link could be until he hears a shout from the Personality holding him “M-my notes! Oh no, without them we cant do the video and no video is going to disappoint all our viewers!” Looking up he sees the page has been blown away and landed on the roof of his cafe.

He gives a pat on Producer's head “It’s fine i can go get it, just sit here and don't…uh pass out okay?” while Four attempted to get Ringmaster and Artist to get along Three started to climb the ladder to get the page. Producer looks up nervously catching the Artistic personality attention he turns and looks wide eyed at Three “Uh hey Three the ladder isn't really stable i broke it when i was messing with paint!” Four looked up in panic “THREE!” Not hearing the group due to the winds Three grabs the page and smiles at them waving it, the wind picks up knocking SMG3 hat off and making him lose his grip as the ladder bar snaps. He closes his eyes as he feels himself fall “I SHALL SAVE YOU MY FAIR MAIDEN!” with that yell he felt warm arms catching him. He opens his eyes only to scream “THERE'S MORE THEN THREE!?” 

[twosoulss77]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but you are allowed to have a favourite ship, canon or not, out of a particular show.

Shipping is just a way for artist and what not to explore different dynamics, or even their own. That’s why I believe we should let people enjoy what they like, without forcing our own image of a certain spectrum into them. Especially cause shaming those people, for trying to explore their identity through art, might cause actual harm to them or cause them to not enjoy doing what they like anymore, bc of hateful comments from someone who hides behind a fake identity to hate on a fictional ship, which in itself it’s a very sad and pathetic way to live, but just cause your life is miserable doesn’t mean you need to make others people’s life miserable you know. Go touch Grass when you feel like being a dick!!!

As an AroAce fellow with no desire for a sexual relationship, I applaud and adore all those people making content of my fav husbands, let it be a fics smut or just normal fluff, I love it all SO MUCH Hazbin Hotel ep 5 changed my whole chemistry, and Say what you will about radioapple / appleradio, but I will always be entertained by the idea of Lucifer angrily doing acts of kindness for Alastor because it's what ‘Charlie would want’, and Alastor being a stupid ‘Bambi’ and try to wiggle himself out of it at the beginning, but then realise that he actually doesn’t mind the king of hell company at all. Both slowly growing to actually tolerate and maybe even like being around the other. Exchanging snarky remarks in a more playful way, playing music together, telling dad jokes, hating on the same delusions glorified iPad …like there is so much potential there that it’s crazy how much it pisses people off. It might be cause I am a sucker for Enemies to Friends to Lovers, but by God if that isn’t the best trope.

I know there will be some smart people out there, that are gonna be like “Alastor is ace”, but so are half the people who ship him!!! I hate when people make assumption on us, on who and how we want to love. I might not be interested in participating in sexual stuff myself, but that doesn’t stop me to explore my own ace-spectrum with these two characters, who if they wanted to could and would kiss each other, Cause for one I says so, I have the power to make that happen *insert hysterical laugh* And second It was confirmed that Alastor is a repulsed Ace, but would also be down to date someone if they were strong asf, (Confirmed in a stream, take that with a grain of salt) still makes this ship more possible than others.

Al being Aroace, doesn't mean he can't date or have sex, he's just not all that interested in it, but that could also derive from the fact that he hasn’t found the right person yet, so it doesn’t feel important to him yet. (fun fact aromantic wasn't the part of my struggle accepting that I was aroace it was actually accepting I was ace bc of my hyper sexual tendencies)

Also Alastor being aro just makes radioapple infinitely more funny to me, or any relationship with him for that matter. He is just this 7 feet tall demon with zero interest in romance, but always managing to find himself having beef with someone, possibly a guy, and act like he is either about to kiss or kill him XD

I really needed to get this off my chest and I absolutely mean every thing I said in here. Everyone has their own likes and dislikes, but you'll be surprised to see how much happier you will be when you stop focusing on what other people are doing and instead focus on what you like.

Thanks for listening 😊💜

[oppaspearl]

𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘼𝙧𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙇𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙂𝙤 (𝙆𝙈𝙂)

Pairing: Idol!Mingyu x Non!Idol reader

Genre: heavy angst. 

Summary: you both don’t want this, but you know you had to do this. 

Date of release: 12/3/22

Words count: 9, 151 words. 

━

Author notes:

Hello, everyone! after uploading a fluffy shot, I would like to share my latest work that made me cry my eyes out for a few days. It was indeed such a long journey of story development, and I want to share it with you. I use Lisa as Mingyu's ex because FOR ME they are the perfect match. No hate for the queen. My inspiration was a video on TikTok about how seventeen broke up with you. And after watching that video, I have the urge to combine it with the story line that I have before. I really hope you guys enjoy it as much as I do. Any constructive criticism will be good and I apologize if there are any mistakes in grammar or any other else that you found in my writing. Enjoy!

with much love, oppaspearl.

━

Playlist:

You know it was wrong to think that your boyfriend is out of love for you anymore when he gives you his world to you, treats you like a queen, stares at you with so much love in his eyes, and always be on your side. 

Maybe it’s the insecurity that blinded your mind.

The insecurity that you kept hidden deep down in your thoughts from the day you meet your boyfriend for the first time. He was a stranger back then, a friend from one of your friends that introduced to you at a party. Without asking who is he, what his job is, and how could he can be invited to one of the parties filled with so many Korean top public figures, you know that your friend introduce Kim Mingyu to you. 

It feels like yesterday when he shook your hands and give you sweet smile as he mentioned his name. You still can remember how the warmth of his strong hands holds you that night, how you melted inside as your eyes met his. The world seems to be stopped at that time as you both drowned in each other eyes, like in every romantic movie that you always watch when you were fourteen. The butterfly seems to be joyfully flying on your stomach as both of you drowned in conversation that night. Starting from there, you and Mingyu then spent time together a lot. 

Then it must become a question if you were so happy with him then why are you feeling insecure? 

Here is the thing, working in the Korean pop industry you know a lot. And by mean a lot, sometimes know everything without having to ask. You know how every celebrity goes on date without the fans and media knowing, how they act when the camera was not around them, and furthermore. Working with so many idols from different agencies, making you and your team talk about everything that happened. And Mingyu is one of the hot topics that your coworker always talked about. 

How they could not, Mingyu is the perfect package that every girl wanted. Do you want someone tall and bulky? Mingyu got it. Do you want to wake up with the view of your boyfriend cooking breakfast and shirtless in your kitchen the next morning after you have a date? Mingyu could do it. Or do you want to have a boyfriend who understands you and knows you more than you know yourself? Well, Mingyu is the one. 

It is not a secret that everyone loves Mingyu since also he is an optimistic guy that radiates positive energy to people around him. As someone who works behind the stage, it was also not a secret for you that some girls from any group or even solo artists are enchanted by Mingyu's charismatic energy. So when most of them know that you become close to Mingyu and had some projects with his group, Seventeen, the girls don’t hesitate to ask you to introduce them to him. You did, but in the end, Mingyu asked you to stop doing that since the person he wanted to get to know more is you. 

As your relationship become grow more intense than just friends who spent time together a lot to become a lover, you start digging more about him. Thankfully, you have a wonderful team that told you anything about Mingyu. Well, not talk bad about him, more like his history and other related. You then learn that Mingyu turns out already has two exes and one of them is working in the same industry as him. Your insecurity was risen by thousands as you then learned that the ex that works in the same industry as him is no other than Lisa Manoban, the Black Pink maknae. 

You’ve worked with Lisa before for few times and you could tell that she is a living angel. If you could describe her in three words they will be cheerful, kind, and gorgeous. She’s dropped-dead gorgeous. But she’s known as someone who is private and has high professionalism. 

If you look back again, you realized that Lisa is the female version of your boyfriend. 

You and Mingyu never talk deeply about his past relationship with Lisa, but you know that they dated for almost three years which you are pretty shocked because you were never taught that the relationship can be perfectly hidden for such a long time. What you learn from Mingyu is that they broke up because they start to grow distant due to their job schedule. He also told you that they broke up on good terms and they still be friends. 

Many of your best friends think you must be jealous of the relationship that Lisa and Mingyu had especially after knowing about their past relationship. But you assure them, that you are fine with it because it’s part of adulting. 

However, you start to feel that you are not fine when the thoughts of your boyfriend don't love you as they used to start to haunt you. More likely the thought of your boyfriend seems not entirely moved on from his ex. You know it’s normal especially when you dated Mingyu seven months after he broke up. This made sense since you read once that mostly after break up, a man starts to realize that he didn’t move on yet from his past in the six months after the breakup. 

Also, you may not have the thoughts if something did not happen. 

First, it started as a little shadow. You remembered very well it was last month when you accidentally look at your boyfriend's phone screen as you feel it vibrating beside you. While Mingyu went to the kitchen to get more popcorn for both of you, he left his phone on the sofa which landed beside you. Your eyes caught what was on the screen and you realize that it was room chat between him and Lisa. Turned out Lisa just missed calling Mingyu and not after that there was another message from her. 

Lisa 

23.30

I’m scared, what if something happened? Can you please come here? 

“Alright, let’s continue the movie, jagi.” 

Mingyu's voice already broke you down as he made his way back to beside you. You quickly turn your gaze to the television before you press the play button on the remote. There are thousands of thoughts running through your mind right now. Why was Lisa calling you Mingyu this late? Why did she ask Mingyu to go to her house at this moment? 

But what strikes you the most was turned out all this time when you focusing watch the movie on the television, Mingyu stole some time to chat with Lisa. You know that it’s childish to be upset about it, but you can’t help it. Sighing slowly, you hold yourself up. Maybe Lisa needs Mingyu's help and she was in a dangerous situation when no one could help her. You know the most that Mingyu doesn’t want to make people disappointed or felt alone. 

“Are you okay, baby?” Mingyu looked at you with more concern, and his arms wrapped around your shoulder, bringing you closer to his body. 

Smiling, you peck his cheeks to assure him that you are fine. When you have a thousand thoughts in your head. “I’m good, just suddenly think about work.” 

“You shouldn’t think about it when you're with me, baby.” he pouted before kissing your head. “This is why we have a movie night, remember? Just you and me, with love, not stress.” 

You just smirked at his words and nodded. Looked at your response, Mingyu just grinning and softly pushed your head with his free hand, so it can be rested on his shoulder as he holds your tight. 

“I love you so much, you know that?” he muttered to your head before kissing it again. 

“I know, I love you too.” 

“So much?”

“So much, baby.” 

Then for the rest, both of you just enjoy the movie tangled to each other. As your mind started to peaceful condition, your eyes slowly close halfway through the movie. The strokes of Mingyu's hands on your hair made you slowly drift to sleep. When you are about to get into a deep sleep you feel Mingyu’s phone start to vibrate for few times. Not only that you can also feel his right finger typing on his phone screen. You just drop it off and let the sleep take care of you. 

But the sleep turned out only last for a few hours because you were woken up by the wet feeling on your forehead. Opening your eyes for just a little and between the blurriness, you could see Mingyu strokes your hair for few times before he left you alone in his bed. You closed your eyes, not moving for the next half hour. Your eyes then looked to the digital clock on Mingyu's desk to find turns out it was two in the morning which was two hours after you drifted to sleep on Mingyu's shoulder. 

His apartment was too quiet for you and by that, you slowly rose from his bed then opened the door slowly. 

You slowly walked to the living room and found it was quiet and dim since the only lights that turned on were only the small light near the window. Your head turned to the kitchen which has an open concept, and you found it still neat and dark. A sigh left your mouth slowly as your cold feet made their way to Mingyu's office which was not too far from the living room. After walking slowly, you finally reached the door which was closed. Your hands slowly turned the knob but you did not find any trace of your boyfriend in the office either. 

With empty hands, you just walked back to his bedroom but your walk stopped as you realize that Mingyu's phone laying above the cold marble of the coffee table in the living room. Sighing, you took his phone and brought it with you to his bedroom. Seems like sloppy is still Mingyu's middle name. He always forgets about his phone when he was in a hurry which results in you calling his manager and telling him to pick it up. 

The door of Mingyu's master bedroom is closed and you make your way back to the bed to get some sleep. As you put Mingyu's phone on his wireless charger that is placed on his nightstand, the screen lights up. Narrowing your eyes to adjust the light, you saw that it was a new chat from Lisa.

Lisa

2.00

Just get it when you come, the pin is still the same. 

There was nothing bigger than your curiosity that night. You really wanted to know what they talked about. Mingyu and you know the boundaries about each other privacy but you both also don’t mind if one of you just want to use your phone because in the end if something was off you just talk about it like every adult does. Tonight, however, you just really to know what they talked at least to make you calm your noisy curiosity in your mind.  So, you decided to know the full version because you just don’t want to have another thought or even the worst thoughts that could make a huge impact on your relationship. 

Turned out the message between them two was growing more… intense? You learned that Mingyu accepted the offer that Lisa previously asked him which you already read earlier. You also learned that turns out Mingyu visited her yesterday before he went home. The funny thing is that it was the same time when he told you that he went to groceries to get some ingredients for him to cook. 

You just standing frozen and staring at the screen. Inside your mind, you were battling with yourself. Should you see the full chat of them to make sure that they didn’t do the last thing that you hoped? Or should you just cool it off and just be okay with it? But is it normal to act like nothing happened when your boyfriend visits his ex without bothering to tell you? 

So the heart won, and you decided to let it go and just bury yourself in the thick blanket that has Mingyu scents over it. As you landed on the perfectly comfortable bed of Kim Mingyu and were ready to get more sleep, your eyes didn’t corporate with you. Either it’s because of the coffee you had this afternoon or maybe the strange feeling that was caused by the winning of your heart, you didn’t realize that you’ve been tossing around for hours. Your eyes closed briefly but your mind was busy as hell. It was like a playground, with a lot of screaming, yelling, and storming mixed in one place which was in your mind. 

You opened your eyes and find out it was already four in the morning. Sighing you grabbed your phone and play your social media to distract your mind. But as you heard the sound of the main door opening, you put back your phone and close your eyes. You pretended to sleep as you heard the master bedroom door open. Not so long after that, you heard the sound of the shower running, then ten minutes later you feel arms wrapped around your waist and Mingyu's soft breath on the back of your neck. 

And so after what happened that night, you never asked Mingyu where he went or what was the reason why he left you alone for two hours. Mingyu also did not tell you about it, so you just let go of it even when you feel an unknown and strange feeling in your heart. 

You choose to ignore it. 

But you know you couldn't help to hope that it will be the first and the last time Mingyu did that. You kind of wish that Mingyu will just tell you about it without you having to ask first. On another side, you also know that his intention was just to give a hand to help Lisa. It was no secret for you and Mingyu that your boyfriend is such a people pleaser and sometimes you told him that he has to endure it. You know that he has a pure intention to help, not only Lisa but most people that asked him for help. 

The worst part is that the feeling and thoughts that you’ve been avoiding kept chasing you, especially when you realize that Mingyu almost spent his time off with Lisa. Mingyu still spent his time with you, but other than you and his groupmates, he spent more time with her. Usually, they went out alongside the 97 groups that you know.  Mingyu as a caring boyfriend explains to you that Lisa is currently homesick and since she couldn’t back to Thailand in a short time, she feels lonely. By that Mingyu told you that he and his 97 groups try to cheer her up. 

You try to be okay with it and pretend that it was not big deal. But eventually, the reality woke you up. The first thing that made you realize is that you and Mingyu slowly rarely meet each other or have dates like you used to have. Besides that the communication between you is also not more than asking about each other doing and activities. It just feels like you are back to the first stage. It was strange because usually no matter busy you are or he is, both of you will have your way to meet each other such as going home to your or his place, having a breakfast date or even just having a quick coffee run in the middle of your lunch break. You knew that during that time, Seventeen also have a flexible schedule since they just finished their world tour and awards season. 

You never thought that it will be a big storm after calming night. 

---

“So, are you gonna tell him?” 

Your head looks up and finds your boss, Suhoon, leaning at your door with arms crossed. Your lips slowly turned to smile as you leaned into your chair while Suhoon walk towards you with both of his hands in the pocket of his pants. Above your glass desk, there was a piece of paper in your grip. Your grip on the paper starts to loosen as you look at it with a blank expression. 

On your hold, the letter of scholarship acceptance in New York City for your postgraduate program was laid and you don’t seem happy at all. It was supposed to be a jolly night when the letter came when you are supposed to be celebrating your acceptance for the study program that you worked for about a year. You should celebrate it with your loved one, but here you are feeling empty. 

“YN,” Suhoon calls you softly. “You seem lost, are you okay?”

You nod, still looking at the paper that you held. Suhoon who knows you for more than five years, let out a sigh and you know he didn’t buy any of your response. 

“Don’t lie, tell me what happened.” 

“Just some issues,” you answer slowly.

“With Mingyu?”

Your right hand previously rubs the paper that you hold. Lifting your head slowly, your eyes then met with his brown ones that have been staring at you. 

“What’s happening?” Suhoon narrows his eyes before taking sit on one of the chairs in front of your desk. 

“I don’t know,” you say, with a low tone. 

Suhoon sighs and rubs his temple slowly. Working as your boss for the past six year makes Suhoon knows about you more than everyone in the office. Besides the fact that you regularly spent more time with him in the past to get your job done, you also hung out with him a lot. It made you become his litter sister that he always dream of. For Suhoon, you are one of the strongest women that he knows so far besides his mother and his wife. 

Being the last child of the kids in the family and with your family living overseas, makes you grow up alone and used to being alone. Suhoon even didn’t understand why you choose to live alone in Seoul and work hard while you can enjoy living in Europe with your family and work as you wanted. 

Little you didn’t know, Suhoon knows you are a fighter, but not for love. 

“YN,” Suhoon whispers. “Please just tell me, maybe I can help you.” 

“Is it normal for a man to visit her ex at two in the morning while his girlfriend sleeps in his apartment? Is it normal that I don’t want my boyfriend to spend more time with his ex? Is it normal for me to feel sad when my boyfriend even forgets about the scholarship that we kept talking about for months? ” 

Hearing your question, Suhoon looks up and his jaw drops. But different from him, you just sit there and didn’t have any expressions that show your true feelings. Suhoon clenched his fist and sighs as he realized who you talking about. All he wants to do right now was to punch Kim Mingyu in the face, but he know he couldn't do that. 

Because you love that bastard so much. 

“Oppa,” you call him softly. “I don’t want to move to New York, just because I need to run away from someone in here.” 

“You know you don’t have to,” Suhoon tells you. “You could just pick a great uni in here and you could move on.” 

“But..”

“YN,” Suhoon stands from his seat. “You are YN, one of the best fighters that I know, and one thing I know for sure is that you fight your ass up to finally achieve all this, to achieve the scholarship that you want since you are in your freshman year in college. You deserved to have a life like what you deserved.” 

“And what kind of life that I deserved?” 

Suhoon sighs again before looking into your eyes. “The life that made you realize that you have to let go of the person that you love, so then both of you can be better.  The life that could give you all the love that you deserved after a long journey.” 

You nod your head and open your mouth to speak further but then it was interrupted as you hear your and Suhoon's phone vibrates. Without thinking twice, you grab your phone and Suhoon too. Turns out it was one of your team who send messages in the work group chat of your team. 

DISPATCH 

UPDATE: SEVENTEEN’S KIM MINGYU AND LISA OF BLACKPINK SPOTTED BACK TOGETHER AND KISSED?! FIND OUT MORE [LINK] 

As you read the headline, your fingers start to tremble. Not after you read that, your coworker sent you the photos of them. Your eyes look to four photos that are being sent on the group chat. It was them, it was them.  The height difference, the broad shoulder of your boyfriend, and even the cap. The baseball cap that you gave him six months ago. Your thumbs just hover over the screen as you look at the final photo which showed that your boyfriend grabs his ex's waist and kissed her on the lips. What is so funny is that in the article it said that they kissed on November 19th, the day of your anniversary. 

You could feel your world start to crumble. Your hands couldn't grasp your phone anymore, and your eyes were blurred by your tears. The phone falls back to the carpet and you can see that there is someone calling you and you know who. 

Without you realizing it, Suhoon grabs you and hugs you tight. Your head leans to his chest as tears start to stream down your cheek. You feel numb, you feel like you cannot do something, and Suhoon keeps whispering some words to you that you couldn't point at the moment. 

It was like Suhoon hugging a mannequin. But that’s what you feel even when your head was in a chaotic situation. 

Your body is in pain like you were just falling from the highest building on earth to the lowest ground. Tears cannot stop streaming from your eyes, you wanted to scream but then you were just too hurt to do anything. 

--

You used to don’t know what is worse than going home with a drunk head. 

But now you know the answer. The answer is that going back home to your apartment with your non-stop ringing phone and a broken heart. Your heart begins to pound and your head is ready to be blown up any second. After Dispatch release the photo, Suhoon insisted to drive you back home, and using the privilege of being your boss, you accepted his offer. 

On the way back to your apartment, your eyes just focused on the view outside of the car. Your body leaned to Suhoon's leather car sit as he drove beside you. Your cold hands grip your bag as you keep telling yourself to not cry in front of Suhoon. Suhoon who drove the car just let the atmosphere become cold and quiet. He knows that the last thing you need is him bickering and asking how you feeling when he already knows the answer. As his Mercedes-Benz reached your apartment complex, you mutter thank you but you avoid his eyes. 

Before you step out of his car, Suhoon's hand holds your cold ones and makes you turn your head to look at him. There were ten until twenty seconds of silence before he told you that he is one call away if you need anything and the only response that he got from you was only a nod. 

Still, in your clothes, you are now sprawled out in your bed. Your bag was not too far from you, as you can see that the sky become darker in minutes. Your phone still ringing and you know who try to contact you. You just start blankly at the sky as it becomes darker and darker, while your mind was screaming. You don’t know which was hurt since it was too painful. 

Deep down, you know what makes you hurt the most and it was yourself.

If only you know that the man that you love still loves his past, maybe you are not in this position now. You could just live happily and he can do that too. So, you wonder again, is this how the universe trying to tell? With you being Mingyu's girlfriend, make them realize that their love was stronger than ever. Was the universe send you to him, so he can realize how much his love for her?

You wanted to scream.

You wanted to yell to the universe. 

But all you do now is just lie in your bed as tears slowly left your eyes. It feels like you are dying slowly. The pain was too hurtful to bear, to at least make you furious. You just feel…numb and stupid. Stupid because you know it will happen and you don’t stop yourself to get hurt. 

Slowly you turned your head to your bag that sprawled not too far from you. Your eyes stare at it for a few seconds, before you let out a sigh and slowly sit on your bed as you reach for your bag to get an item. Your hand took your phone from your bag and again for the nth time, you take a long deep breath before your phone screen lights up. 

There were some missed calls and new messages that spammed your notification. Of course, most of them were from Mingyu and the rest was from your best friends and all member of Seventeen. Your best friends asked where you were and how are you holding up after the news. From your notification, you can read how they are yelling at each other and how they want to fight Mingyu at the moment. 

Besides your best friends, all members from Seungcheol and Chan also asked about your well-being and asking where you were. You get the most message from Seungcheol and Seungkwan who are pretty close to you. From their message, you can feel their worry about you. 

Then the last you read how your boyfriend handle the situation that was caused by him, well accidentally caused by him. Mingyu has missed calling you about thirty times, and most of his messages were telling you that he can explain what’s happening, asking where you were, and he told you that he was on his way to your office so you can go home with him. It was roughly five minutes when you arrived at your apartment. 

Either it’s because your job to handle some crisis or it was too painful that makes you numb, you sigh and write a message to him. 

To: Mingoo ❤️‍🔥

21.00

I’m fine and I’m already back at my apartment since five minutes ago. I think I need time alone to calm myself, please.

So you just hit the send button before turning off your phone. You don’t know what to do, and for the first time in your life, you don’t know what you should do. It hurts every corner of your body, and you just want to sleep it off, hoping the nightmare was gone when you woke up in the morning. 

Maybe it is a good idea for you, to clean your make-up, has a hot shower, and then sleep. 

Rising from the bed, you slowly take off your coat and put it on your chair before moving to your wardrobe. Heck, you even couldn’t walk properly. Besides the fact that it hurts every inch of your body, your mind still can’t function properly. Like your mind was torn into some parts that are buried in different yet deep places inside of you. What made it worse is that you don’t have enough energy to look for each piece and fix it like it used to. 

Deep down you cursed yourself. 

You knew it will happen, but why didn’t do anything?

Why were you just peacefully sitting there while you know it will make you hurt? 

There were so many questions you asked yourself, but you couldn't answer one of them yet. You wonder what Mingyu truly feels, was he mean it when he says that he loves you? Was it coming from his heart, or it was just to convince himself that he loves you more than Lisa? 

You cannot lie to yourself that you didn't love him because hell you love him more than you love yourself. You realized it when it was already two months after you have the first date with him, you know it was such a short time for you to admit that you love him. Heck, you won’t be this painful if you don’t love him. 

As your hand takes some shirts from your wardrobe, your eyes then focused on a black box that is perfectly hidden between your shirts. Without realizing it, your hands slowly grab the box. Tears start to gather in your eyes as you realize what was inside the box.

It was supposed to be Mingyu birthday present. 

You remembered very well how you secretly contact so many people as you looked for the jacket that Mingyu always talks about. You remember very well how Mingyu talks about it and sadly said to you that jacket was discontinued. It’s a simple black jacket with the hoodie on, but there were some details on the pocket that made it look chic, which made it suit Mingyu. And luckily you find the jacket in his size. 

You are the type that has a hard time keeping everything in secret. So, keeping your gift from Mingyu is a very big challenge for you. It is also the reason why you hid it deep inside your wardrobe. Walking towards your bed with the box on, you keep glancing at the box before you open it. 

The jacket was still there, neatly packed with some white tuile to protect it from any dirt. Above the jacket, there was an envelope that has not been closed. You decided to open it and realize that it was a letter that you wrote alongside three polaroids of you and Mingyu. On the first polaroid was you and Mingyu who stares at each other with big smile and so much love in each gaze. Mingyu arms are wrapped securely around yours, as your right hand were on his chest. You realized that it was the photo that you took when you visit his family for Chuseok and the polaroid was taken by his sister as the three of you enjoying the evening view from Mingyu’s balcony. 

In the same place as the first one, the second photo has the same background but it has differences. In the second photo, Mingyu looked at the view while you look at him with so much love in your eyes. His arms are still wrapped around you but your hands, not his chest. And the last one was the polaroid of you wrapped around each other at Wonwoo's birthday dinner. Smiles were wide on your and Mingyu’s lips.  

Seeing those pictures made you miss Mingyu more. It feels like you just want to run to his arms and beg him to stay. But all of your thought was ripped as your eyes focused on the second picture. It made you wonder if that is how your and Mingyu’s life could be if you just let all of this go. You know that by loving someone, you also need them to be happy. 

Those big smiles that you secretly found on Mingyu's lips several times as he typed something on his phone, or the times when you look at his happy expression as Chan danced to one of Lisa’s songs in their fan meeting has made you realize something. Maybe letting Mingyu go, will make him find his happiness which is on Lisa. 

Yes, you will be hurt. 

Yes, it’s gonna take a long time to heal it. 

But you know that you could not make Mingyu happy. You love Mingyu and he loves you, but you know that his love for Lisa is bigger than what both of you have right now. You are not blind, you clearly can see it in his eyes and how acts. 

You know it’s time for you to leave and stop being in the middle of two people that fall in love. 

And so by that, your body collapses on your bed as tears stream around your eyes. You try to scream but you can’t because it is just too painful. It was too painful for you to let the person that you love the most go and back to his happiness. 

But you know, sooner or later it will be more painful to see him pretending to be happy when he’s not. It will be more painful to finally realize that you could not make him happy. 

You realized, right now is the perfect time for you to leave. 

---

Seungcheol

19:00

He just left the dorm, on the way to his apartment. Are you there? Please be safe, call me if you need anything.  

Your eyes look at your phone screen. Reading back to the message that Seungcheol sent to you fifteen minutes ago, you sigh slowly and lean into the chair. You tighten your hands as you mentally prepare for what you want to talk about. Turning your head to see the view outside, you realize that it was already snowing. It’s the perfect time for you to play with some snow and enjoy a cup of hot chocolate. Your mind traces back to the memories of when you used to play in the snow outside with your brother while your mom told you to go back before you catch a cold. 

Speak of your brother, you missed him. You missed having him around you, you missed how you can talk for hours about all your problems with him, and you missed how he hugs you to assure you that you are safe. Those warm hugs that keep you calm in the middle of the storm. 

Maybe after all of this is finished, you will back home and call your brother right away. 

“YN?”

Your head turns to where the voice has called your name softly.  The voice was too familiar for you. Standing not far away from you, Mingyu looks at you with his mouth half open. Your eyes meet his and you can see that he looks fresher than ever. Mingyu walks slowly towards you with his eyes still on you while you raise for your sit. 

“Baby,”

Please don’t call me that, you beg silently in your mind. 

You try to keep your tears in place but your mind betrays you. A tear left your eyes as you sadly smile at him. The mixed feeling that you got as you look at him after two days of radio silence was so overwhelming. Deep down all you want to do was bury yourself in his warmness, but you know you couldn't do that. 

“I-I’m sorry,” Mingyu whispers before he walks to you and hugs you tight. As his arms wrapped around you, your arms just stay in the position. You didn’t hug him while he hugs you like there is no day for tomorrow. Tears flow down your cheek as you also can feel a wet feeling on your hair. Indeed, both of you cry. 

“I-I’m sorry,” Mingyu whispers again and again before he looks into your eyes. “We can fix everything right? I love you,” 

I love you too, but I know you love her more. 

You just stare at him blankly. His brown eyes with so many worries as you try to memorize them closely. The moles on his nose, his puppy eyes, every detail of Mingyu that you know will be missed. Especially those lips. Gosh, those plumpy lips that kissed you with so much love and passion. Those lips that give your head and cheek pecks whenever you are wrapped around his arms.

“Mingyu-ah,” you take a deep breath before looking straight into his eyes. You realize how his eyes widened as you call him by his name instead of the nicknames that you always used. Not Gyu, baby, babe, loves, chagi, but just Mingyu. “I-I think we need to talk about it, about us.” 

Mingyu looks at you like he knows what will you talk about. Lowering his gaze before letting out a sigh, he then nods slowly before sitting on the sofa. You sit beside him, giving space between both of you. For a few seconds, there was huge silence between you, as you glued your eyes to your hands that were on your lap. You still don’t have any guts to look at Mingyu back but you know he was looking at you. 

“Before we talk,” Mingyu’s husky voice ripped the silence. “Can I hold your hand?”

Still lowering your head, you nod at him and take his hands to yours. Now in your sight, you can see clearly how your hands holding his right hand. The difference with your cold hands, his hand was warmer and it makes you hold it with both of your hands. But the warmth of his hand also pulls you to the reality where you have to talk about it right now. 

Mentally prepare yourself for the second time, you take a deep breath before asking, “It was true, wasn’t it?” 

“Chagi,” 

“Please don’t lie and cover it up,” you mumble to him. “I need the truth.”

There was firmness that Mingyu felt in your tone and he knows you already know something. Something that is cruel and has been hurting you. None like other people who punch him in the face, you just sat there beside him and still held his hands. 

“Yes,” Mingyu weakly answer. 

“Does she knows about us?” you ask. As the question left your mouth, you prepare yourself for his answer next. You were silently thankful that you are holding his hand because it was a distraction so you don’t have to look into his eyes. 

“No,” your thumb that slowly caresses his hands suddenly stops. 

You were frozen as you heard his answer. Among all the problems, it was one thing that made you feel like just being punched by someone in every inch of your body. But then again, your thoughts just laugh at you, knowing it will be happening. You should have known this. Why did Mingyu bother to let Lisa knows about your relationship with him when he was still in love with her? Stupid you. 

It made you realize too that your relationship with Mingyu was being hidden pretty well like how you hid the black box in your wardrobe. 

A tear escapes from your eyes and touches his hands. Feeling the wetness of it, Mingyu becomes a little bit tense and you can feel it from his hands. Cursing yourself for letting the tears out, you just nod. You just nod like it was a normal thing that you heard every day when it was not at all. 

“I think we should end here, Mingyu.” 

As the sentences left your mouth, Mingyu straighten his body but not pulling his hand from yours. You know that your sentence must be shocked him because it honestly shocked you too. 

But you don’t have any better choice. 

“Y-YN…”

“Let’s end whatever we have in here, Mingyu.” 

This time you look into his eyes. There was no trace of stars or even love that you used to see before. His eyes scream confusion, fear, and any of it that you never imagine seeing in his beautiful eyes. While your eyes screams pain and tears welled up, your lips however tugged a beautiful smile. It hurts you too, more than anything.  

“Chagi, no.” Mingyu shakes his head and holds your hands with his. His voice becomes tremble as you can see tears in his eyes. “No, we can fix this, please, I-I-I love you… I’m sorry. It wasn’t supposed to be this far, I swear. W-we can talk about it, I tell her now about us and--” 

You lower your head and shake your head slowly. “There is nothing we can do, Mingyu.” 

“B-But I love you!” His hold on your hands becomes tighter as his voice increased. Yet, you still lowered your head and avoided his eyes. “P-Please, just let’s talk about it and I swear… gosh… I swear to start to forget everything about her. Please just… stay.”

“I can’t,” you look at him. “You love her, Mingyu, you still love her and I can see it clearly in your eyes. Even if we fix whatever it is, it can hurt us, it can hurt you even more.” 

There is a pause between both of you, and as Mingyu doesn’t reply to your last sentence, you take a deep breath before continuing. 

“I don’t want to do this either,” you chuckle softly. “But I cannot force the person who I love to stay with me because I know it will hurt them, it will hurt you. You deserve to be with someone that you love, Mingyu. You deserved to live and earn that happiness, even when it does not come from me.” 

Mingyu lowered his head before you could see his shoulder shake. You know he cries and it hurt you too. Without knowing it too, you also silently cry. Both of you still held each other hands, but both of you also drowned in the cries. Looking up, you sniffle and without thinking twice you pull Mingyu into your arms. In seconds his arms make their way to hug you and you can feel that he still softly cries on your neck. 

“I’m not mad at you for loving her, Mingyu,” you say softly as your hands threads his soft hair. “Because you have the right to love the person that you want and you deserve that. You deserve to be happy with someone you love and I don’t want to hold you from that. You still have me on your back, whenever you need me... I’m just call away even when I’m not yours or the otherwise. I love you, and let me love you with my way from now, okay?”

“I’m sorry,” Mingyu looks up. You can feel how your heart broke as you look into his glassy eyes. “I’m sorry I used you, YN.” 

You shake your head. “No, you’re not, Mingyu.”

“But I am,” he sighs. “I took you for granted… gosh I used you as my rebound, YN. I used your love to heal my feeling, then I just run away from you by bringing your heart with me. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, hey.” you softly call Mingyu and make him look straight into your eyes. “It’s okay, I will be okay, Mingyu.”

“But I hurt you the most,”

“You are worth it,” you sadly smile. “You are worth the pain that I have, Kim Mingyu.”  

--- 

The street was… emptier than usual. 

It was around eleven o’clock when Kim Mingyu’s Range Rover slid through above Gangnam streets. As his left hand was on the wheel and his eyes focused on the road, his right hand was nestled on your hand. Your eyes are glued to the outside view as you lean on the leather seat. Between both of you, the silence was thickly lingering which was different from the usual. Usually, at this hour, you and Mingyu were nestled in each other arms on his bed or having some karaoke car night as you both went to some fast food restaurant. 

But tonight, it was different. 

There was a box of your clothes in the back seat. Clothes that you purposely put on Mingyu's wardrobe. You decided to take them all with you back to the place they were from tonight. Alongside your clothes, your heart also comes with you tonight as you put back Mingyu’s back into his hand. 

After your talk, Mingyu insisted to drive you home. You declined the offer at first, saying that you just take a taxi and you don’t want to make him go back pretty late. Deep down, you just don’t want to be in the same car with Mingyu, especially in the car that always accompanies your date with him. 

“I know it's selfish, but let me just…drive you back for the last time. I just want to spend more time with you as… a lover, before today ends.” 

You sigh as you look at Mingyu's expression as he told you the real reason why he insisted to drive you back. To be fair, you have the same wish as him but you buried it as the thoughts came to your mind. Looking at his lost blank expression, you then finally accept his offer. But as Mingyu look at the box that was filled with your clothes, he was frozen. As you mention to him that you are ready, Mingyu sadly smiles at you before grabbing the box. 

“C-Can I hold your hand? Please?”

As Mingyu steps into his car after closing your door, Mingyu looks at you. You look at him with a blank expression before nodding. This time, Mingyu pulls your hand to his as he starts to drive. After that, both of you just drowned in each other thoughts. 

You don’t know what’s on his mind, but you do know very well about yours. If someone asks you about what you feel right now, you honestly don’t know what to answer. Not only you were tired, but you just don’t know where to start to explain it. You love Mingyu and you never expect to be in this situation where it forced you to let him go. But here you were, sitting on the passenger seat of Mingyu's car and holding his hands while you can feel yourself starting to lose yourself. 

“We are here, love.” 

Blinking your eyes, you realize that both of you are already in your apartment block parking lot. You take a deep breath, before nodding and taking off the seat belt. Mingyu’s driver seat door was just open as you call his name softly and tighten your hold on his hands. Not three seconds, Mingyu turns his head and finds that you still sit in your seat with glassy eyes that look forward. 

“Mingyu-ah,” you take a deep breath before looking at him. “I’m sorry.”

Hearing you apologize, Mingyu frowns at you before sighing. But as he open his mouth and was ready to speak, you cut him off by continuing, “I know I should fight for us, but I don’t think I could…I don’t know if I can be strong enough in the future and I don’t want to trap you in the relationship that holds you from your happiness.”

“Oh, love--”

“I love you, Mingyu,” you say between your tears, tightening your hold on his hands. “This past year was… pleasant to have you in my life. Thank you for making my life more…happy and colorful with your love. Thank you for loving me even when I’m at my lowest, and thank you for always being there. I’m glad that I met you and am yours.”

“YN,” 

“Don’t cry,” you sadly smile and wipe his tears with your thumb. “Please don’t make it harder, Gyu.” 

“I’m sorry,” he says between his tears. “Gosh, I love you… I do, YN, please believe me that. I’m sorry for this happening to you, I’m sorry that I can’t move from my past, YN. Sorry for seeing you as her.”

“Hey look at me,” you cup his face with both of your hands and look him forward with your glassy eyes. ”It’s not your fault, okay? Don’t blame yourself because you falling in love with someone. Mingyu. I’m glad you have her in your life, I do, and I know that you can do so much better and happier with her. I know you can love and protect her more than me, Mingyu. I know that.” 

“But I hurt you, YN!” Mingyu snaps. “You, the person that put your heart into me, the one that always sees me even when no one does, the person that taught me so much, the person that I suppose to love only and--”

Without any word, you pressed your lips to him. For the last time, please. The kiss feels different while there are nothing changes. You still can feel the softness of Mingyu's lips, the mint flavor, and the feel of his hand grasping your neck softly. Physically nothing changes but mentally everything changes. You know after this kiss and after you left him, there will be no us between both of you. 

There will be no YN and Minyu as a couple. There will be no more nights spent in each other arms, no more late-night calls when Mingyu is overseas, no more Mingyu who accompany you working late in your living room, and no more sweet kisses from Kim Mingyu. 

You are all alone again. 

“I love you,” you whisper as you broke the kiss. “I will always love you, even when you are someone else’s.” 

Mingyu nods and closes his eyes. “I love you too, YN YLN, always and I’m sorry.” 

“I’m sorry too…” you nod. “Goodbye, Kim Mingyu.”

And so you take a deep breath before letting go of his grasp. Wiping your tears, you mentally support yourself to get a little bit stronger at least until you are already secure in your apartment. You smile at him before you pull the door open. Tighten your hold on your coat, you then go to the back seat to take the box. You don’t want to bother Mingyu who seems lost and still in his seat as so take the box and close the door.

Before walking to your apartment's main door, you wave your hands at him as he stares at you blankly. Without wanting more time, you just walked to the door as tears streamed down your cheek. You hold the box tight as you silently cry. The pain was stronger than before until it make you cannot walk properly but you force yourself because you don’t want Mingyu sees you like that. 

Don’t turn your back. 

Don’t look at him again. 

Just walk and cry, YN. 

“YN,” 

You heard Mingyu calls your name and make you stop walking. Betraying your mind for the nth time, you turn your body to look at him. Mingyu stood all 187 cm, and the dark navy coat that has a grey collar that he wore perfectly shaped his body. His eyes were red and swollen same as yours. 

“Thank you,” pause. “Thank you for letting me love her.” 

Smiling at him, you just nod while your heart cries loudly. You then walk inside your apartment building, leaving him back in his car. As you wait for the elevator, tears cannot stop leaving your eyes. The pain was too painful to bear with it, and it made you realize that you are alone now, without Mingyu. 

---

“So, did you tell him?” 

You look up from your phone before turning your head to Suhoon who sits beside you.  The departure from Incheon Airport was empty when you arrived. Cold morning breeze haunts your skin even when you are already protected by your thick Burberry coat. Today is the day when you will be leaving for New York and Suhoon alongside his wife was accompany you tonight like how your parents do every time you leave Europe. 

Heck, you were even already in the airport six hours before check-in opened. 

You shake your head for the answer to his question. Instead of giving you long lectures, Suhoon just stares at you before slowly nods. He knows that maybe it was the best decision and he believes you have your own reason why you didn’t tell Mingyu about your departure. It’s been a month since the breakup, and Suhoon already noticed some changes in your life that mostly you don’t want to discuss it. He is thankful for the scholarship because of it most of his time was being used to process some documents for your departure. But Suhoon cannot cover the fact that he is also sad because he lost the happy version of you, the colorful version of you. 

Suhoon who knows you for years even shocked too by the way how you calm and managed to survive the pain that he knows hurts you the most. Yes, he did see you cry. Yes, he noticed how your eyes looked puffy when you walked to the office. But with you sitting beside him, Suhoon just sees any trace of peace and calmness on your face. 

“What happened if one day he come to me and asked where were you?”

You sigh, then look down. “Just tell him where I’m, it is okay.”

“Why?” Suhoon furrows. “Most of the people I know that have the same case as yours, most of them didn’t let the person who hurts them know where they were. But why are you just letting him know your whereabouts?”

“Because it means, you already have peace with it, oppa,” you explain. “I love Mingyu, and I already know the fact that his love now is for Lisa, not me. If we really meant to be together, there will be thousands of ways that make us back to each other. But if not, then we just really need to let go or else we get hurt more.” 

“Will you miss him?” 

“Of course,” you smirk. “But it’s part of letting go of someone you love”

You know you will be missing Mingyu and in fact, you are missing Mingyu. There is no day you didn’t think about him, about what he does at the moment. But you know that it was not your name that was on his heart right now, and you try to make a peace with yourself for it. Let go of someone that you love is… tough, but forcing someone who stays and loves you while his heart is already placed in someone else is tougher.  

Maybe in another lifetime you and Mingyu will be together forever and you become his happiness.

But not in this current lifetime. 

How is it? I really hope you cry because I did for two days straight after writing this LOL! By the way, Part 2 is in progress and yes it will be multiple chapter and my target is finished it by next month, so please tell me more about what you feel after you read this. with much tears and loves, oppaspearl.

[poopingonthefloor]

Davesport is Toxic NOT abusive

(((WARNING: PRETTY LONG POST UNDER THE CUT.))) I've seen some people making the claims that Davesport is comship/proship (ok well i've more seen people bitching about it) and im tired of the Davesport slander so this will be an analysis of their relationship. My motive isn't to force anyone to ship it or anything- i really dont care what you do with your life, my frustration is just when people try to make up REASONS why they don't like the ship, even though its literally canon (and not badly written). My main point is -- You can hate what you want. You don't need a reason, and it doesn't need to be bad just because you don't like it. But I will not take any slander on their ship nor any slander of people who like davesport. Davesport is absolutely toxic-- No DSAF fan would disagree. They are literally child murderers with little to no souls and literally are physically disfigured to the point they don't have the capacity to feel proper humanity anymore. You cant expect 2 men who live their lives willingly murdering and then partying in vegas to celebrate on repeat to be gentle and kind to themselves or anyone else.

However, its NOT abusive. I've seen multiple people (mostly from twitter screenshots) claim that Davesport is abusive or the way people portray it is in a fetishy or romanticizing way of abuse, when that's just not the case. I don't blame a lot of people, since a lot of it comes from reading context and intent of the artist, which not everyone is good at-- BUT I'm here to assure you that MOST people don't intend to do that much and just like to portray how their dynamic is canonically like or portray Daves obsession with Jack. Another argument I've seen (by a twitter screenshot...) is that people are comshipping Davesport because people draw Jack annoyed a lot at Dave when...thats not true? That's just Jack's personality, first off:

(From the Dave x Reader fanfic by Directdoggo)

"Jack is a bastardman not very touchy-feely. We can see this in many scenes, where Dave more or less says “I love you” and Jack responds with deflecting humour, or outright scorn. When Dave says it for the final time, this time, Jack tries to say it back, but can’t outright, only getting out: “Why is this so hard?” and “I hope you can find peace with what you’ve done.” Which Dave understood the meaning of. (Hey, better than Henry (LEGACY Jack) hearing “I love you” and proceeding to tear Dave limb from limb, huh?"

(Directdoggo describing Jack's personality)

I know it can be a little confusing to some people, but as someone who struggles with similar issues, just because he struggles to express intimately doesn't mean he can't love anything. Sometimes people are just different and communicating like that doesn't come as easily, even to the people you're closest to. To make it as easy as possible to comprehend-- He's quite literally a tsundere. (Minus the exaggerated ridiculousness in anime) He loves Dave, he just cant bring himself to say or act like it. The dismissiveness or rudeness in response to Dave's affection is not abuse, it's just a defensive response since he doesn't know how to say it back. (His way of being "shy") -- Also note its important that Dave UNDERSTANDS this about him by that point.

However Jack isn't the only thing I've seen regarding the claims that their ship is abusive-- and to debunk all of those I'm going to explain the three points that keep Davesport from being abusive, and I'll use Henry x Dave (which is what I'll call it to prevent it getting confused for FNAF willry) as an example alongside it since its super obvious why that one is messed up. Firstly, They are both bad people. By this point, Dave and Jack are murderers. It's just not surprising that they will be willing to kill each other at at least some point, considering they are willing to kill 5 year olds without remorse- and they'll both deserve it. It's only their own faults that they teamed up with the other, and it's meant to be the ultimate irony when Jack becomes even worse than Dave by "An ending". My point is- they're bad people. It's not like they're owed perfect company or would choose wholesome people to hang out with when they're literally both child murderers. Dave wasn't evil and didn't want to kill by the time he teamed up with Henry (and even after it was Henry's fault), so by that point his suffering was absolutely undeserved.

Secondly, They're lacking any specific power dynamic. Unlike Henry and Dave- whom have several levels of "Age, Father figure, and Employer", the most important one is that Henry is Dave's abuser. He manipulated him and purposefully harmed him both mentally and physically, whereas Dave never had any intention of doing either because Dave loved him and didn't want to lose him (because he had nobody else) This obviously much different with Dave and Jack, whom other than being taller and several years older than (which you can argue their 6 year age gap is weird but they didnt get to know each other till they were both older than 30 so by that point age difference doesnt rlly matter and (also theyre "mentally" like 24 and 22 canonically anyways (as much as I usually hate that argument)) Other then that they are only co-workers. This is a bit more arguable during DSAF 1, where Dave comes across more threatening and comes across like he's manipulating Jack, but I don't exactly count that because I wouldn't say theyre "shippable" or in their "situationship*" by that point (but also because them even being a ship was barely considered by the creator at that point obviously)-- whereas Dave is certainly more easily recognized as sincere to Jack in DSAF 2. Jack also is not someone who is afraid to defend himself against Dave, as shown by the fact he's willing to call out Dave's ridiculous behaviors (which is reasonable of him to do).

(Also from the Dave x reader fanfic) (I just think this specific screenshot debunks any sort of "power dynamic" claim)

My Third and Final point: There is a CHOICE involved I haven't really done much Dave defense in this post, but his defense is very simple: He is literally physically unable to comprehend guilt or conscience. Dave didn't want to murder anyone in the first place, but it was Henry who fucked with his (literal) head so much to the point he stopped being able to feel guilt. He doesn't care about murder and doing wrong because he CAN'T care. You can't really let that reflect Dave as a character when he's really not in control of himself in the first place. Now with that, that doesn't change the fact he could certainly affect and hurt people, and it's fully up to Jack as to whether or not he wants to deal with this purple man's freakish life choices and hobbies or not. And that's honestly super dependent on the ending you decide to base Jack on. Most people see the 'canon' endings to be: Gnarly ending (DSAF 1) -> An ending (DSAF 2) -> Good ending (DSAF 3) Where in all of these, Jack DOES choose to deal with Dave and basically is completely cool with murder. You don't have to follow those endings if you don't want to, but that's just typically what the modern "Davesport" is known for, but its what I'm using for my defense (considering this is a defense of both fandom and canon Davesport.) Though as opposed with Henry and Dave- Dave had no choice. Henry only ever manipulated him into thinking he did, and Henry made sure to feed this whole 'we will be a family' ideal into Dave (who never had one) so that Dave would be terrified to lose him. Jack never manipulates Dave (when teamed up with him), and Dave never manipulates Jack (tho arguable in DSAF 1 as well). They stay with each other despite all of their issues, and I believe its due to some co-dependency (imo I think Jack is also obsessed with Dave just in a different way before DSAF 3) Which isn't healthy, but not...inherently abusive.

I believe my main three points kind of cover the most of why I dont consider Davesport to be inherently a bad ship, but like I said- if you don't like it, none of that matters anyways. You dont NEED a reason to like something, and I wont try to convince you why you should ship something because I like it. Just don't hate it just because of what someone else says-- 90% of the dsaf fandom aren't comshippers, and Davesport isn't gross or "toxic /neg" just because it's not healthy. I think "Don't fetishize/romanticize literal abuse like its normal or sexy" and "We should explore more complicated and unhealthy dynamics" can and SHOULD coincide with each other!!!! I think Davesport is great because of how bittersweet it is that these two people finally found solace and acceptance in each other but couldn't get past the self-sabotaging nature of what Henry turned them both into, ultimately making it impossible to work out forever. I think embracing the Davesport makes the (kind of aged) trilogy a lot more enjoyable of an experience and I DO encourage any davesport skeptics to keep an open mind. [Pretend I wrapped this up super nicely I can never do that--- Also this is open for conversation and/or debate, and also yada yada my bad if i said something randomly terrible I have extremely poor social skills lol let me know so I dont do it again yada yada] *Also if anyone doesnt know a situationship is (at least in the context im using it in ive heard other definitions for it but its not a real word so i actually dont care) when 2(or more) people basically treat eachother like lovers but they never communicate this outright and dont technically officially date but like they treat and commit to eachother like a partner would) (So its kind of what all those people who playfully flirt and call each other their spouses as a commited running joke are in)

[inamagicalhallucination]

i had the best bsd famous no powers au headcanons because i got the mental image of dazai saying he “hates” chuuya and none of his friends should listen to him because chuuya sucks and atsushi sadly putting the chuuya poster he wanted to buy back

and also “wait so dazai can sleep with chuuya but i cant listen to his music??? wtf ???”

most of them would be in the entertainment btw but a few exceptions here and there

okay first of all a lot of the ways every one met every one would be different for the sake of like creative liberty sfakdj like dazai and atsushi would have met earlier ; i would probably not put akutagawa in the music industry so his relationship with dazai would be different - but i havent actually worked any of that out yet so ignore this

anyway

first of all - a key plot point would be that chuuya and dazai had a falling out - and i mean an actual falling out like they cant stand anyone bringing the other up

which really sucks for the ada becuz like chuuya’s music >>>>>>>>>>>

anyway here are what i think some of the characters would be like

chuuya: 

- he rose to fame as a teenager - he’s wildly known for his good music and his smexy face 

- a good portion of younger artists like his music and look up to him

- he likes writing his own music but sometimes feels conscious about more dark/personal songs

- had a falling out with dazai at some point becuz of this he does not like ppl listening to the music that comes from dazai’s friends but he does secretly like a lot of their songs

- has secret social media accounts to stalk dazai

- has cried becuz he convinced himself at some point about dazai ‘being with’ almost everyone at the agency (at different time periods) and was not right even once

- every single one of his friends knows that half of his music is obviously about dazai but no one knows how to bring it up

- every one’s favorite thirst trap

- you know how a product will appear for a .000000000000000001 sec w/ a bts member and immediately get sold out ?? yeah thats how it is for him

- he’s very strict about crediting ppl - like someone will say like two words to him that’ll inspire him and he’ll credit them as co-writer

//

dazai:

- im not sure if i want him to be a singer or not but he’s definitely involved in other aspects such as writing producing etc

- HATES chuuya 

- so much that he’s constantly thinking about him like the pathetic wet cat that he is

- he has forbidden everyone in the agency from listening to chuuya’s music

- there may or may not be a secret underground community within the ada that listens to chuuya’s music and fangirls over him and it may or may not include everyone but dazai

- when someones mad at dazai they blast chuuya’s music

- *listening to chuuya’s music, secretly* wait is this fucking song about me ? ... nah

- atsushi once wrote a song about dazai and how glad that he was that he had a brother figure like dazai and dazai cried for 24 hours straight 

- atsushi is no longer allowed to casually write about him 

- he acts really playful and aloof but he streams all of his friends music religiously and is secretly their biggest fan

- has tried to convince everyone he knows that sings to sing his suicide song - no one has agreed yet

- he has trouble finding inspiration but when he does he latches on - sometimes he’ll disappear for days and then come back with the most perfect songs 

- really only openly nice and supportive to atsushi tbh 

//

atsushi

- i want him to be with dazai earlier becuz i think it would let their dynamic really settle and atsushi trauma-response personality won’t be as prominent if that makes sense

- atsushi’s favorite musician is everyone :D no im kidding thats what he says but its actually chuuya 

- yeah he’s the younger brother of dazai (not sure if their kinda like brothers or just adopted brothers or what yet) and he’s in love with chuuya it runs in the family

- he’s in a band

- it’s called snow beneath the moonlight - it’s him, naomi, and junichiro

- maybe they’ll add lucy and/or kyouka but idk

- atsushi’s the main singer - juni’s on drums - naomi’s on guitar - but they switch around for the funsies

- im gonna create a separate section for them actually and keep the focus on atsushi for now

- atsushi’s solo music is....

- the first album he released came after weeks and weeks of people spotting him going to the studio in bright fun clothes - and he posted a lot of fun things

- so everyone thought it’d be a fun, motivational bop album

- it was so fucking sad like holy shit what the fuck atsushi go to fucking therapy

- really good tho :>

- like if you could u would inject his voice into ur veins 

- ya know lyn lapid’s song detached 

- yeah

- if atsushi sang that itd be about akutagawa btw im not saying anything but i am

- a lot of his clothes are styled by rashomon - a fashion brand owned by the akutagawa siblings - half because of however celeb - brand partnerships work - half because he somehow became ryuu’s muse 

- i want him to live with dazai - which is one of the reasons why they need to meet earlier because i had the mental image of atsushi talking about moving out and “yeah so i moved out of my brother’s place and ya know it’s strange. good at times but strange. Like i can do so many things i was never allowed to - like i can get wasted, try acid, invite someone for the night, buy chuuya nakahara posters, put up my chuuya nakahara posters, listen to chuuya nakahara’s music, own chuuya nakahara’s albums”

- since i think dazai would probably let atsushi drink as long as he’s not insane about it , throw kunikida in there too

- has a lot of songs about ryuu but he’ll never tell him

- ryuu listening to any love song by atsushi “wait is this fucking song about me??? ...nah”

- he may or may not be fucking ryuunosuke akutagawa i cannot deny or confirm anything

//

akutagawa:

- he owns a fashion brand with his sister solely becuz i showed him to my friend a few months ago and i said “sorry he dresses like a sad vampire victorian orphan thing” and she said “that is the sexiest man i have ever seen” or something like that its been a hot second

- may or may not be in love with atsushi you cant prove it - well okay sure he has collection after collection inspired by atsushi but-

- okay so maybe he listens to atsushi’s music when he’s coming up with designs but-

- okay so maybe he has all of atsushi’s albums hidden where atsushi cant find them but-

- okay so maybe atsushi’s been at his place enough for akutagawa to think ‘oh no what if he finds all the albums’ but-

- anyway

- he had a lot of goth, punk, etc, vibes and stuck to a dark, muted color range

- and then one day dropped a gold-violet colored bright not-at-all-like-his-previous-stuff collection and pretended it was normal

//

snow beneath the moonlight - band

members: atsushi, junichiro, naomi

- it was started in highschool by juni going to atsushi and being like ‘wanna start a band’ and atsushi, who was sleeping a little cardboard box in the spot where the sun was, was like “hmmm? um sure zzzzzzzzz” if that makes sense 

- naomi found out about it and joined before atsushi and juni could ask her

- so typically it’s atsushi on vocals, naomi on guitar, juni on drums, but they can be pretty versatile like atsushi’s usually got a guitar on him sorry i cant think of the words rn and juni can play the piano and naomi can do all of that

- naomi and juni sing too if they want - theyre not strict about roles 

- they wrote their music together in highschool 

- they still do - but now when their stuck they dont cry they ask others for help :)

- very sweet and fun vibes

- they literally just do whatever they want - if there is a style or genre they want to try they probably will

- naomi has to do a lot of the talking becuz juni gets uncomfy and atsushi’s attention span causes him to leave ppl mid conversations becuz he saw a cool leaf

okay

//

quick notes:

- not sure if oda and his orphans will be alive but itd be weird to kill them off in this au for me but idk

- oda’s a writer

- poe is also a writer 

- idk where to stick ranpo in becuz it hard for me to imagine him being anything but the world’s best detective

- i kind of want yosano to be in the industry but i also want her to be a doctor

- the ada is just fukuzawa’s adopted children that do whatever they want career wise becuz of him - nepotism babies btu theyre all orphans 

- kyouka’s a singer and so is kenji

- katai’s a producer

- kunikida’s someones manager but who knows whose he only ever babysits dazai and the rest of hte agency

- so as you can see im still working out the kinks of this au

- if you have suggestions or comments lemme know

- this would be equal parts skk and sskk and whatever the fuck everyone else’s got going on

- kouyou would also be a singer - im thinking classical

- q is that child artist that you love but cant help but wonder fi theyre being exploited

- lucy is trained in america and started off there but has recently moved to japan idk how thatll work for her

- sigma is a big atsushi fan btw

- the ada is so chaotic and disorganized and half the ppl there arent even in the industry but it’s just a cover for fukuzawa’s children so it still works

anyway i might continue this and update as i go

feel free to ask more about this au or give ideas or whatever <33

[starandcloud]

42!Miles Headcannons

I am on a kick of Spiderverse, so Tumblr gets it-

Miles has separation anxiety with you, which got a lot worse when you started dating, him being the prowler and all

He cannot handle the sound of guns, it makes his anxiety race.

He'd never admit it but he genuinely likes your company, like he'll deny it then go out of his way to find stupid reasons to hang out with you. Which his mom plays into. Miles: Aye, Idiota. Come over. My mom misses you. Y/N: Ooookay? Rio, hugging Y/N: Y/N I've missed you, how've you been? Are you feeling okay? Have you been eating enough? Y/N, laughing: I'm okay Mrs. Morales, thank you for worrying about me though Miles: *Absolutely smitten by how you interact with his mom*

Leaves you gits randomly, like if he's out on a job with his uncle and he sees something he knows you'll like he'll swipe it (and leave money) and either leave it on your desk or put it on your window sill. You've yet to catch him

He HAS stopped and watched you sleep when he left you a gift, not in creepy way more like a "God... They're so perfect..." His eyes, hidden behind his lil mask, softened on you. He only left because the hallway light flicked on and he panicked. That was the loudest he had ever fled from somewhere, he didn't even close your window.

He is really artistic too, he has dozens of sketches of you in his sketchbook. You're his favorite thing to draw

Don't get me wrong, I'm a sucker for Miles wanting to kill someone for you. But he would only think it, he'd never actually act on those thoughts. He couldn't bear the weight of taking a life, even if it was for you. He's a vigilante, remember

As terrifying as he seems, Miles is a HUGE baby when it comes to getting hurt. He'll act like he's fine, but when he's with his Uncle or Mom he cries. Like ugly cries, he's a huge baby-

Has Trypanophobia (The Fear of Needles), hates the sight of them and cannot handle it when he has to get shots

When he cannot handle anything anymore he goes to his dad's Mural and just sits there, he doesn't talk or make any noise. He just sits against the brick, sometimes he cries, sometimes he doesn't but he's always there late at night so no one really sees him

He doesn't talk to anyone he actually has a crush on, like he's flirty as hell with everyone but the person he actually likes he's really blunt and distant. Like a dumbass

I can 100% see Miles being Omni, like he could like anyone as long as he's close to them

We all know Miles' sleep schedule is FUCKED, he's a Vigilante, he doesn't get to sleep much due to everything being at night. But he still gets good grades and sleeps when he can

This is literally one of his posts on Twitter and you CANNOT tell me otherwise-

He isn't really bothered by people who're taller than him, or people who are a few inches shorter. But if you're below his chin he's wary, he's heard enough from Ganke not to mess with people that short. "They have to climb to get things, I don't wanna mess with someone who climbs counters.

I can see him being taller than 1610!Miles, cause 1610!Miles is 5'8" so I can see 42!Miles being anywhere from 5'9 to 5'10". Like it's not a noticeable difference if you're not paying attention, ya know?

Miles does Photography, but it's more of a hobby. He doesn't plan on turning it into a career, but he does it when he's got the chance, his posts look like this

Bubbly_Rose and Vanilla.Coffee.Addict. Are both his mom, different accounts to support her son. Best mom 100%

Miles has dozens of playlists on spotify, most of which are for his friends and family.

Cat person but has a german shepard named Luna

Had dreads ONCE and decided he hated them, so he stuck to his braids

Miles can cook, really really well. His mom and him used to bond through cooking and now it's something he does when he's stressed or upset

Depending on how tired Miles is, is how he sleeps. If he's just a lil sleepy, his legs are kinda bent and his arms are by his head, HOWEVER, if it was after REALLY tiring job with his uncle he kinda just falls onto his bed and sleeps like that

He usually doesn't go to anyone for comfort and comforts himself unless it's really bad then he goes to his mom or (if he really REALLY trusts them) his significant other

Miles has a tendency to flinch/move away from any form of touch that's not from his mother. He gets pins and needles if he's not expecting a touch and it is almost painful, I wouldn't say he's touch-starved but with his mom working so much it's easy to see that he would be

The one thing that brings Miles' to tears is watching his mom work herself to the bone and never being able to take a break. It makes him so mad that he can't help her, without it being obvious, that it reduces him to tears

He cries when he's mad

He hates it when people go through his things or move them. He has everything in a place, everything has to be perfect. Major OCD when it comes to his room, it's his space and he wants it perfectly clean

Miles takes really good care of himself, he keeps himself in shape (outside of being the Prowler) and makes sure to eat and hydrate right

Miles. Is. A. Huge. Softie for little kids. He acts like he can't stand them but the minute he's flashed a toothy smile from a little kid, he can't help but smile back

He considers a few people who aren't family, his family like Ganke

His idea of "A Perfect Vacation" is going anywhere with his mom and Uncle. It could literally be a trip to his Paternal Grandmother's house, and as long as his mom isn't working he is perfectly content

Miles tends to bite his nails and chew on his lips when he's nervous

By FAR the strangest thing Miles has ever seen was one of his classmates straight up touching their eyeball, that happened when he was 13 and it still freaks him out

Miles accepts advice relatively well, he doesn't show it but he does

He hates most pictures, but there was a few that his version Gwen took of him.

He is horrible at talking to someone he's got a crush on, like worse than 1610!Miles ;-;

Miles wakes up before his mom, when she's home, and makes her breakfast, he eats, showers, and goes to school, comes home, does his homework, goes to his boxing class (curtesy of Uncle Aaron), and depending on the day either goes on a job or goes to sleep

He has a few scars on his face from one of the first few jobs he was on when he wasn't far enough away from a bomb when it went off

Ocra. He CANNOT with the texture of it.

He loves stormy weather, its relaxing to him

He loves Fall and winter, the crisp air makes him smile

As a way to waste time, he goes to the gym or draws

When Miles wakes up from a nightmare, he kinda just lays there until he puts his headphones on and falls asleep to whatever song he's listening to

Miles collects little doo-dads from the street, it gives him something to fidget with

Miles knows English, Spanish, and French. He had to take a second language class and he COULDN'T take Spanish, so he's relatively fluent in French

Miles is the type of person to give someone the tightest most affection hugs, like even if he's just friends with the person. Hugs are like "I love you"s for Miles, they're sparing things from him

If Miles had three wishes from a genie he'd wish for: 1. His mother to either be paid more or for her to work less 2. His city to have less issues 3. To talk to his dad again

CROSSOVER: Miles is a gryffindor, with a Kingfisher Patronus and an 11.25 in Applewood wand with Unicorn hair ((I don't support J.K. Rowling))

Miles saw you in his clothes once and it MELTED him, he physically leaned against the wall and smiled stupidly

If you don't typically wear glasses (despite needing them, like my dumbass) and you wear them around Miles. The first time he saw you in them, he was distracted enough he walked into a wall.

Miles will protest being called cheesy things likes "Babydoll", "Pumpkin" "Sweets", "Bubba", "Light of My Life", "Tater Tot" (this happened ONCE, "Sunshine", "Dumpling", "Bambie", and "Babyface". He genuinely loves it when you call him that. Specifically: Babydoll, Pumpkin, and Sunshine. He still likes the other ones but loves those more.

[wangxianficrecs]

💙 The Difference a Stab Wound Can Make by RadAceFriend

💙 The Difference a Stab Wound Can Make

by RadAceFriend

T, WIP, Series, 49k, Wangxian

Summary: The sword went through Wei Wuxian's chest. Suihua went through Wei Wuxian's chest. Kay's comments: Another series marked as incomplete, but the story definitely feels complete! In which, at Qiongqi Path, it's not Jin Zixuan who dies, it's Wei Wuxian. So, Jin Zixuan lives, but at what cost? The cost is that he has to grow up and grow as a person as he realises how corrupt the Cultivation World is. Everyone is congratulating him on killing Wei Wuxian and he's just really not feeling it and I really loved this Jin Zixuan POV. Also has the nice effect that the Wen remnants live, something the second and third story of the series deal with. Wangxian get a happy ending in the end as well, because Wei Wuxian still gets to return as Mo Xuanyu. Excerpt: His father ordered a stone tablet carved of his noble deed and Jin Zixuan wanted to scream. The design the artist had drawn to give over to the stone carver showed his sword piercing Wei Wuxian, the expression on his own face one of righteous judgement while Wei Wuxian’s was one of murderous rage. There was a second drawing, one of him in the main hall with A-Li against him. In that one, Suihua dripped blood still, and A-Li’s face was one of sorrowful acceptance, and his one of peaceful resolution. Jin Zixuan hated them. Jin Guangshan ordered for both of them to be carved and put up with the images of his own accomplishments, so that everyone would know what his heir had done. It was only at night, when A-Li was asleep, and Koi Tower was quiet, and he was as close to alone as he could get with only the peepholes he could find blocked against peering eyes and listening ears, that he took A-Ling from his cradle. A-Ling was still so young that he did little but eat and sleep. But sometimes, he was awake, and not crying, and this moment when Jin Zixuan picked up his son was one such moment. He pulled out the bell and tassel. “Someone wanted you to have this.” He said quietly. He spoke in a low voice rather than a whisper. One of the first things he had learnt from his mother was that a whisper travelled further and could be more clearly heard than a low tone. “He made it, to protect you.” A fastened the bell to A-Ling’s swaddling clothes. “It will have to be a very strong resentful creature if it wanted to harm you.” He gently pressed his lips against A-Ling’s forehead, where the vermillion mark had already been painted. “I’m sorry that you will never get to meet him.” He rocked his son back to sleep, ignoring the pain still lingering in his ribs and chest.

pov jin zixuan, pov wen qing, pov lan sizhui, canon divergence, jin zixuan lives, jiang yanli lives, wen remnants live, canonical character death - wei wuxian, thirteen years of wei wuxian's death, butterfly effect, lan wangji/wei wuxian get a happy ending, not jiang family friendly, jiang family dynamics, grief/mourning, survivor guilt, cultivation sect politics, angst with a happy ending

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