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burgundybmw · 2 years

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Munson's Mixtape

Masterlist

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Cunningham!Reader

Word Count: 3,342

Warnings: ED mention, Mrs. Cunningham being the worst mom ever, mention of Eddie's shit dad, angst, funeral mention, hurt/comfort.

Summary: Chrissy has been acting weird, and like a good big sister Y/N drives to Hawkins from Notre Dame to check in on her. Only to find out she has plans to meet up with Eddie Munson. Things take a turn for the worse and now Y/N gets wrapped in to the horrors of Hawkins. Hey, at least she has the company of the guitarist she was sweet on back in high school for comfort.

Author’s Note: A mutual trauma dump can be something so special. I promise this is going to be the last of the angst for a minute, until I get to the episode 9 stuff that is. Just a warning, it will be angsty. But this is a fix it fic! So... take that with what you will. Hope you guys enjoy!

Track Nine

They should have left Hawkins when they had the chance. If only she had gotten her shit together after Chrissy died. They could've been in Canada by now, made their way into Alaska or something. It was only the Hawkins police, the FBI or the CIA wasn't involved then. Eddie would have been a wanted man sure, but they wouldn't have found them. They weren't even looking for him, but now they were.

A million and one regrets came tumbling through Y/N's mind. Why didn't they run? Why didn't she try talking to the police first? Before they started pointing fingers at Eddie? She knew they would do that. Knew it from day one. But she didn't do that, she decided to waste precious time. Eddie had to take care of her, because she was a mess. This whole goddamn thing was a mess. Y/N couldn't understand it. How could anyone look at the state of Chrissy's body and think Eddie would do that? How any human being could do that? Didn't they do an autopsy? See how there was no weapon involved? Why were they going after Eddie? Sweet innocent Eddie?

She was pacing around the boathouse trying to come up with a plan. Y/N tried to have faith in Dustin, Max, Robin and Steve, she really did. They had experience with this sort of thing before, the Upside Down, monsters and mayhem. But they weren't familiar with people, those who didn't know about what was beneath. Y/N was. She feared that even if they did win, if they succeeded in killing Vecna, that Eddie would still get thrown under the bus. How could they make the people of Hawkins believe that an inter-dimensional monster was behind Chrissy's death? The government wouldn't allow the truth to come out, so how could they cover it up?

"Y/N stop pacing, you're going to make yourself sick." Eddie had been trying to get her to relax for the past hour. After they heard the police sirens, Dustin and his friends left to go see what was going on. Y/N had been pacing ever sense.

"I can't Eddie. I need to think. I need to come up with a plan." Could they pin it on someone else? Some random killer? Maybe they could contact the government doctor who helped that Eleven girl disappear. What did Dustin say his name was? Dr. Owens? Yea, he could help. They could create a fake serial killer, surely Vecna was going to strike again, that could work. She could say that Eddie and her had been kidnapped. They could get their stories straight, but this plan entirely depends on the help of one man, if they could even find him. Y/N didn't like those odds.

"Dustin has a plan Y/N, we just need to sit tight while they do their thing." A plan? What plan? Find Vecna, kill him, and boom Eddie's safe? That's not a plan, it's barely an outline.

"I don't want to gamble with your life Eddie! We are in some serious shit right now!" She didn't mean to yell at Eddie, but he was playing fast and loose with his life. She wouldn't stand for that.

"Dustin might have plan A in the works, but I'll sure as hell have plans B-Z worked out solid. Then I'll start working on the greek alphabet, maybe throw in some fucking Egyptian hieroglyphs in the mix. Whatever it takes to make sure you don't get blamed for this mess!" Y/N could feel the tears falling down her face, she didn't realize she was crying.

Eddie stood up and wrapped his arms around her. She could smell the weed they had smoked earlier, and the cheap detergent they used to wash their clothes. It was soothing, familiar. He didn't say anything at first, just held her as she cried. She was so sick of crying.

"I don't know why you're so worried about me sweetheart. You're driving yourself crazy trying to find a way to save my sorry ass." Y/N didn't know why he wasn't worried. This was his life on the line.

"I just can't lose you too, Eddie. I can't go home after this and see my fucking parents knowing Chrissy won't be there anymore. I can't go back to Notre Dame knowing you're rotting in some prison cell or worse. I just can't." Eddie was rocking Y/N back and forth as she cried. He didn’t know how the hell he earned the loyalty of Y/N Cunningham, but he wasn’t going to have her shed tears for him anymore. His heart couldn’t take it.

“Everything’s gonna be fine Y/N. I’m not worried, you know why?” Y/N looked up at him then, her beautiful eyes glassy and wet.

“Why?” She sniffled, the tears finally stopping.

“Because you’re right here with me. You’re fucking brilliant Y/N, and if Dustin’s plan fails I know yours won’t. You’ve never let me down before, hell, you’re the one who defeated Vecna first!” Y/N laughed, her face shoved into Eddie’s shirt.

“That was a just a game Eds…”

“Just a game she says. DnD is not just a game Y/N. It’s a lifestyle.” She lightly flicked the side of Eddie’s head before she took a step back from him, getting a better look of his face.

“You’re ridiculous.”

“Yea yea, you still love me though.” He pulled her back into the hug, not willing to let her go just yet.

Y/N stayed silent, she didn’t trust herself not to spill her heart out to him. To say that yes, she did love him. She was falling in love with Eddie Munson. It made her sad to realize this now. The first person she would have told was Chrissy. She likes to think her sister had an idea about her feelings for him. Back when Y/N was still in high school she would talk about Eddie to her after their tutoring sessions, back when she didn’t acknowledge the affection she had for him. Chrissy would tease her, ask her to bring Eddie home with her.

“He looks so scary, Mom would totally drop dead if he took a step into the house.” Y/N just laughed it off, told her not to threaten her with a good time.

“I don’t know about him, but if you like him he can’t be all bad.” Y/N had rushed to defend herself, said it wasn’t like that. Chrissy had a look on her face then, like she knew something her sister didn’t. As if she knew that when they would talk about their futures, Y/N hoped it was Eddie who was with her in the end. She hopes that one day she’ll see her sister again, tell her about what happened after she died. Y/N never really believed in a heaven or hell, but after learning about the Upside Down, she hoped that her sister was out there. Somewhere peaceful, that somewhere over the rainbow.

“Now come on, dry those crocodile tears. I want to listen to that mixtape I made you. I’m sure Rick has some spare of headphones lying around this shit hole somewhere.” She separated herself from Eddie and went to go sit in the boat. Eddie left to go sneak into the main house, leaving her by herself. She grabbed her walkman and headphones, gently placing the cassette tape inside, and let the sounds of Iron Maiden fill her ears.

Hours passed like that, Y/N and Eddie laying on the boathouse floor side by side, listening to the old mixtape. When Rainbow in the Dark started playing, Y/N started crying again. She told Eddie that it reminded her of Chrissy. He asked her if she wanted to skip it, but she didn’t let him. She said it was good to think about her, let her memory live on in her. If she forgot about Chrissy it would be like she died all over again. Eddie held her hand as the song played, both of them seeking that small comfort in each other. They didn’t notice that the walkie talkie Dustin gave them was going off at first. It wasn’t until Eddie went to switch the cassette over to the other side that they heard him.

“Dustin?” Eddie responded after he untangled himself from the intertwined headphones.

“Christ Eddie, I’ve been yelling through this damn thing for that past 10 minutes. Over.” Henderson had such a little attitude problem.

“Whatever man, you’ve got us now. What’s the situation?”

“We found out how Vecna chooses his victims. Over.” That got their attention.

“What did you find out? Why did he pick Chrissy? Did he get anyone else?” Y/N was shooting one question after the other. She had the walkie in an iron grip, Eddie thought it might break.

“Woah woah slow down. One at a time, the reception on this thing sucks. Over.” Y/N took a deep breath, mentally preparing herself for whatever Dustin was about to tell them.

“What do you know?”

“We went through Ms. Kelly’s files at school. Apparently Chrissy and Fred both were seeing her.” Fred? Who’s Fred? Another one of Vecna’s victims?

“According to Ms. Kelly’s notes both of them were experiencing the same symptoms. Headaches, nosebleeds, trauma. Does that sound familiar to you Y/N? Did Chrissy tell you anything like that? Over.” Dustin continued.

“Headaches and nightmares yes. She didn’t mention nosebleeds, but she probably wouldn’t have worried about it too much. Wait, what do you mean by trauma? What happened to Chrissy??”

“Um… I don’t know how to tell you this Y/N… But according to Ms. Kelly’s notes, Chrissy used to make herself throw up... Over.”

“I know, but what trauma are you talking about?” Y/N didn’t see the shock on Eddie’s face. Chrissy made herself puke? Why would she do that? Y/N knew about it?

“Oh. Well, Chrissy told Ms. Kelly that her, I mean your, Mom was always harping on her about stuff like that… She also said that-”

“Don’t tell her that Dustin! She doesn’t need to hear that!” That was Max’s voice in the background.

“Tell me what.” There was radio silence for a moment.

“Tell me what Dustin.” More radio silence. The silence was thick, nearly choking her.

“Chrissy said that it got worse after you left for college. That you always took the heat from your Mom when you were there… but after you left Chrissy was the only person left for her to unleash her wrath on… Over.” Y/N passed the walkie over to Eddie, her eyes distant and cold.

“Anything else.”

“Robin and Nancy have a lead they’re going to check out tomorrow. We’ll give you another update then... Tell Y/N it wasn’t her fault, Chrissy didn’t blame her. She talked about her all the time… Ms. Kelly underlined multiple times that Y/N was Chrissy’s favorite person in the world... Over and out.” Eddie put the walkie back on the floor and turned to Y/N and her thousand yard stare.

“Y/N?” She didn’t respond.

“Are you alright?” Radio silence.

She stayed like that for awhile, staring off into space. The next words out of her mouth scared Eddie half to death.

“It should have been me. Chrissy died because I wasn’t in Hawkins. It should have been me.” Eddie didn't know what to think. Is brain was in information overload. What happened to Chrissy, why it happened. How it could happen to Y/N.

"Y/N..."

"You heard Dustin. Vecna only goes after people with trauma. The Upside Down is only in Hawkins right? He couldn't reach me at Notre Dame... If I was here Chrissy would still be alive." Eddie thought he was going to be sick. The idea that Y/N could have been the broken body in his trailer, he didn't want to think about it.

"Why would Vecna go after you? Chrissy was the one who used to... do that. I mean, I get your Mom, but if every kid in Hawkins with shitty parents got Vecna's curse there'd be hardly anyone left." Eddie didn't want to believe it. He didn't want to believe Y/N could be next.

Y/N looked to Eddie then, like she was begging him to understand. She wanted him to understand something she couldn't say out loud. Eddie tried to, he really did, but he just couldn't think that something so horrible had happened to her to cause Vecna to inflict his curse on her.

"Chrissy wasn't the only one." A rock settled in Eddie's stomach.

Chrissy wasn't the only one. Chrissy wasn't the only one. Chrissy wasn't the only one. Chrissy wasn't the only one. Chrissy wasn't the only one. Chrissy wasn't the only one. Chrissy wasn't the only one. That one sentence was banging against the walls of Eddie's skull over and over again.

"What..." It was barely audible when it left Eddie's mouth. He could hardly bring himself to speak.

"It was both of us. We both did that. Our mother did that to us." Eddie was never a hateful person. There were people he didn't like, people he couldn't stand even. But there weren't many people he hated, but he sure as hell fucking hated Mrs. Cunningham.

"Chrissy and I used to lock ourselves in the bathroom. I would sing to her and run my fingers through her hair while our mother would bang her fists on the door. Shouting at us, telling us we were fat, disgusting, pigs... Just horrible awful things." Eddie's fist was clenched so hard he'd thought he'd break the skin. His whole body vibrating with anger. How could she do that? To her own fucking daughters. How the fuck did Eddie not notice. How did he not notice something was wrong. How many times did he watch Y/N during the lunch, watch her walk out the doors of the cafeteria 10 minutes before the end. He was angry with himself. He paid too much attention to how her skirt swished around as she walked to put the pieces together. He was startled out of his thoughts when Y/N started laughing. It wasn't her normal laugh, bright and cheerful, it was crazed, nearly manic.

"I mean Jesus Vecna! What are you doing! I'm the bigger fish! You have soooo much material to work with!" She was pacing again now, shouting at the ceiling of the boathouse.

"What do you want to start with huh big guy? Gonna have mother show up in my dreams next? Show me the same shit you showed Chrissy? Or do you want to mix it up? Huh? Be fucking original! Gonna show me mother dearest threaten to give me up again? Tell me that she wished she never bothered to adopt me? That I wasn't even her real daughter? Maybe that's why you don't bother to show your face to me! I've dealt with monsters my entire goddamn life! Lived with them under the same fucking roof! Who the hell do you think you are? Have we not suffered enough! Fuck you!" She wanted to scream. Scream until her lungs collapsed. She wanted to break things. Destroy.

Eddie watched her unleash her anger. His heart ached for her, but he could feel it too. Not at her, never at her. Everything else. Vecna, Mrs. Cunningham, fuck, even his own parents. Who gave them the goddamn right?

"Yea! Fuck you Vecna!" Eddie shouted into the ceiling. This wasn't a good idea, people could hear them. But in the moment he didn't care. Didn't care about any of the consequences.

"Fuck you Vecna!" Y/N shouted again.

"If you think you're next on the chopping block, then I'm following you right through the depths of the Underworld baby. You hear that Vecna! Wanna take a peak at my psyche next?!" Y/N watched as Eddie joined her in the screaming match against the boathouse ceiling. He was glorious.

"Gonna show me dear old dad next! Have him call me some pansy ass satan worshipper! Like he's so high and goddamn mighty sitting in federal prison! Gonna show me Jason fucking Carver and his laundry basket bunch call me a freak every chance they get! All the people of Hawkins looking at me like I'm nothing but trailer trash! Come onnnnn Vecna! You know you want to, you self righteous piece of shit!"

Eddie and Y/N just screamed after that. Screamed at nothing. Screamed at everything. Just got it all out of their systems. After awhile they just stood there, facing each other: hearts pumping, adrenaline rushing, throats aching. Y/N didn't know when they got so close to each other.

Eddie had a wild look in his eyes, like he was determined about something. Y/N had the same look, but she knew what she was determined about. She was going to kiss Eddie Munson. She was going to kiss him till she couldn't breath anymore. She's was going to kiss him like the world was about to end.

Right when she was about to close the distance, finally get her hands on him, the sound of the walkie went off.

"Eddie? Y/N? You there? Over." The sound of Dustin's voice breaking the spell between them. Eddie cursed under his breath and snatched the walkie from the floor.

"Yes Henderson?" He gritted out.

"I just realized I forgot to tell you both something else about Vecna. Over."

"Can it wait?" Eddie loved Dustin Henderson, he was like the little brother he never had, but right now he wanted to shove that walkie up his big mouth.

"Can it wait, pssh, like you guys are busy. Over." Why yes Henderson, Eddie was busy, busy trying to have the balls to kiss Y/N Cunningham.

"What is it Dustin?" Y/N asked, her voice much calmer than it was before. The moment was over, Eddie lost his chance.

"Vecna had another victim, Fred Benson. I mentioned him earlier? Over."

"I gathered that Dustin. Anything else?" Y/N asked. She tried not to sound annoyed with the kid, he didn't know what was happening before he called. Maybe it was a good thing Dustin interrupted, stopped Y/N from making a fool out of herself.

"Yea, Max. Vecna is going after Max next. Over." Eddie and Y/N looked at each other, why was Max cursed? She's just a kid.

"How do you know? Is she safe?" Y/N didn't know Max, she just met her the other day, but she was so young. Too young to go out like that.

"She's safe for now. Max has been having the same symptoms as Chrissy and Fred. She has a bit of time, Vecna follows a pattern with his attacks. Hopefully we can figure something out soon. We'll keep you posted. Over."

"Sounds good man, ugh, let us know." Eddie sighed, it seemed like every time they spoke to Dustin all he had was bad news. Eddie was tired of bad news.

"Oh and Y/N? Over."

"Yea Dustin?"

"Chrissy's funeral is tomorrow. Over." Her funeral. Her sisters funeral. They were burying her tomorrow.

"Oh... Thank you Dustin... for letting me know." Did she want to go to the funeral? See her mother's face? Knowing she was the reason why Chrissy was dead? Could she do that alone?

"Yea well, that's everything. Over and out." The walkie went silent. Y/N slowly sank to the ground, she was exhausted, all of the energy in her body slowly bleeding out of her. Eddie followed her to the ground, just as tired as she was.

"Are you gonna go?" He asked.

"To what?"

"Chrissy's funeral?" Was she? Would Chrissy want her to? To dress up in black, look at her casket, watch her slowly descend into the cold hard ground. Have people come up to her, tell her that Chrissy was in their thoughts and prayers. Tell her how much of a tragedy it was, that someone so young and beautiful be taken so soon. As if she didn't already know that. Y/N knew what she was going to do, she just hoped Chrissy would have approved of her decision.

"No."

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reddrobins · 4 years

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damians happiness [d.wayne]

Older! Damian Wayne x Reader

Summary: The batboys begin to notice a shift in Damians behavior. Being the detectives they are, they decide to find out what could possibly could be bringing the demon child happiness.

“I’m worried.” was all Dick said when he made his way into the large kitchen.

Tim picked his head up from his computer, a look of confusion plastered on his face, “About?” The teen asked.

Dick leaned against the far countertop, looking at his younger brother. “Damian.”

Though Tim and Damians relationship had never been peachy, some part of him still cared for Damian, so he continued, “Is he okay?”

“Yes.” Dick said, waving his hands, “That's why I’m worried! He’s not his angsty self anymore, Tim!” Then he dropped his voice to a whisper, “I saw him smiling yesterday.”

Tim spit out his coffee. Damian? Smiling? “What? How? When? Does Bruce know?”

Dick passed his brother a paper towel and then shrugged, “I don’t know why or how or whatever, All I know is that somethings up.”

While wiping the spill, Tim bit his lip in contemplation, “Should we ask him? Like just in case he’s being mind controlled or under some toxin or something?”

The older son nodded, “Look, normally I wouldn’t spy on any of you, but this is worrying. I'm just thinking, maybe tomorrow we hang out with him. Forge it as some brotherly time and just see how he acts. A little recon mission.”

“Should we get Jason in on this?”

Dick shook his head, “No can do. Said he was on a mission with Roy and the gang.”

“Bruce?” Tim then suggested.

“Not yet. We’ll tell him if things get bad, don't want to bring too much attention to operation Annie.”

Tim quirked an eyebrow, “Operation Annie?”

Dick shrugged, “Yeah, you know, like orphan Annie. She's like always singing about how tomorrow will be happy and stuff.” At the look on Tims face, Dick rolled his eyes, “Whatever, I don't normally come up with mission names… Leave me alone idiot.”

Tim grinned and having nothing better to do the next day, agreed to his brother's plot.

“I’m telling you, beloved, that a single bad mark isn't going to stop you from getting into Metropolis University.” Damian said into the phone, “Plus, if it just so happens to halt your admission, tell them you're dating Bruce Wayne's son.”

You laughed on the other side of the phone, “Dames, I am not using you as a way to get into college. That's just wrong.”

The teen vigilante shrugged, “They would be imbeciles to not let you admit anyway. It would be their loss.” Then, “And my love, why do you even want to go to Metropolis? Its so far away…”

“Aw,” You teased, “Will a certain boy miss me?”

Damian scoffed, “Obviously. The days are long and boring without my beloved.”

Blushing, you asked him, “Enough about me. What are your plans after this semester?”

Damian thought about what graduation meant for him. Full time as Robin. Was the only thing to come to his head. Of course though, he couldn't just say that to you. He hadn't mentioned that part of his life yet.

“Most likely boring business meetings.” The wayne teen said glumly, “Of course if you were to come work for my father…” He trailed off.

“Damian, I told you. I would love to but I already have my heart set on the Daily Planet.”

The stupid Daily Planet. That had been your dream since your eleventh grade journalism class. Damian didn't know why you had settled on somewhere as far as Metropolis, He thought the Gotham Gazette was just as commendable.

“I know, I will just miss you my love.”

You laughed at his neediness, “Dami, I will still talk to you daily. We have phones you know.”

“I know, it's just not-” A knock sounded at his door, “One minute (Y/N), someone is calling for me.”

Damian got off his bed and walked towards his grand door. Opening it, there stood Dick and Tim, suspicious smiles on their faces.

“Dames!” Dick said, grinning at his brother.

This caused Damians suspicion to grow, “Grayson.” He said formally, “What's the occasion?”

“Nothing special,” The man spoke, “Can’t a brother just want to spend time with his own?”

No, Damian wanted to say.

“What about you Drake, is it brother time as well?”

Tim shrugged, “I mean if Dick says so.”

“Damian, should I go?” Your voice rang out in a quiet whisper from the phone.

The addressed teen put a finger up, signalling his brothers to silence and then brought the phone up to his ear. “I’m sorry bel- (Y/N), our conversation will have to be continued later.”

Nodding in understanding, you said, “Of course, no worries Damian. Love you, have a good day.”

He hung up before he said it back, not wanting to clue his brothers in on his new secret lover. Before he could stop himself, a small lovestruck smile made its way to his face.

Too late.

“Who was that?” Dick asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

The youngest child rolled his eyes, smile dropping, “No one of your concern. Just a schoolmate needing help with work. Now,” Damian acknowledged the two at the door, “Can we get this brothers day over with please.”

The day started off just as Damian had suspected, boring.

Dick had suggested the three of them go get ice cream and take a walk around Gotham Park.

Damian had already yawned a multitude of times, wanting nothing more than to go back to the manor and talk to you.

“So,” Tim spoke, “This is nice, I feel like we never do this.”

Dick nodded in agreement. Though, Damian not so much.

“Yes Drake, I love being dragged from my room to walk around a people infested grounds area. Certainly this is how I wished to spend my day.”

At that, Tim looked over at Dick, scrunching his nose. So much for Damian being happy, His eyes seemed to say. Dick just shrugged in response, maybe he did just imagine his brother's happiness.

Just about as he was going to speak, Damian's phone rang and the youngest teen excused himself.

“(Y/N)? Is something wrong?”

As your conversation continued, Tim and Dick had one of their own.

“It's that girl again.” Tim said. Dick nodded, “Look at him, he's smiling.”

The two turned to watch Damian, who was now smiling into his phone, kicking the dirt beneath him absentmindedly.

“She's the one that’s doing it to him. She's making him happy.” Tim deduced.

The eldest son rubbed his chin, pondering, then, “Tim. I have an idea.”

“Oh no,” The teen mentioned, moaned, he knew that look. It was the classic, ‘Grayson is up to something stupid’ look.

“You’re a genius with computers.” He spoke, Tim nodded along, “Tonight, we get a hold of Damians phone. You trace the call back to whomever (Y/N) is and tomorrow, we invite her to the manor!”

Dick, being the optimist he was, thought his plan was foolproof, Tim couldn't help but disagree.

“Two things, Dickie-bird, First, how the hell are we going to get his phone?” Tim asked, And secondly, this sounds like a horrible idea. I can't help but see this fall apart in like a million ways.”

Before Dick could disagree with his brother, Damian returned. “I apologize for that. What have I missed?”

Tim was going to fill him in, but Dick interrupted, “Who was that Damian?”

The teen mentioned glared at his older brother, “None of your business, Grayson…” Then, “But if you have to know, it was my classmate again. They had another question on the homework.”

Tim passed him a smug look, “You two seem to be awfully close or just classmates” He teased.

“Tt.” Damian gave, “At least I have game, Drake. Why don't you go back and talk with your minecraft girlfriend?” Dick laughed as Damian smirked while Tims face brightened to a cherry red colour.

That night, you had received an odd text before heading to bed.

Hi, is this (Y/N)?

Was all it read. With hesitance, you responded:

Yes, and this is?

The next text was much more cheerful.

hi! My name is Dick. I’m Damian's older brother. The little man's phone broke so he’s asking me to message you. Tomorrow, he was asking, if you’d like to come over for Lunch? Here's the address: 1007 Mountain Drive, Gotham

You stared at your phone. Damian was inviting you to his house? Though this invite didn't really seem like a Damian move, you accepted.

Sure. Is 12 a good time to swing by?

Dick responded with a quick ‘perfect’ before saying goodnight.

Turning off your phone, you rolled over and went to bed. All the while dreaming about what tomorrow would bring.

“Done.”

Tim looked up from his computer, making eye contact with Dick. “Done with what?” He questioned.

“I texted the mysterious (Y/N) and invited her to lunch.”

The younger brother's eyes went wide. “How,” He questioned, “How did you get Damians phone?”

Dick smirked, waving his own phone, “I didn't! It was genius, I just did a quick search on the batcomputer and her info popped up. So I texted her.”

“If Bruce finds out, you're dead.” Tim then shrugged, “I have to hand it to you DIck, that was pretty smart.”

Flashing a glimmering smile he spoke, “What can I say? I’m not all looks, Timothy. I have some brains in here.” He tapped his head.

Twelve o’clock had arrived much sooner than expected.

After being dropped off by a taxi, you stared up at the big house. You had always imagined Damians house to be large, but this?

Shaking your thoughts away, you gingerly made your way up the stairs and to the front door.

Do you knock? Ring the doorbell maybe? Your thoughts were rampant, not wanting to make a bad impression.

Before you could even lay a finger upon the button, the wide doors swung open, revealing a tall man with sparking blue eyes and a disarming smile.

Dick Grayson. You knew from the tabloids.

“Um, Hello?” Your greeting came out more like a question, leaving Dick to chuckle.

“Hi!” He said excitedly, “I’m so happy you could make it… I mean Damians happy you could make it. He planned this after all!”

You eyed the older man, suspicious at his wavering tone of voice, but dismissed the distrust. “Yeah… me too.”

Silence took over the conversation as you stood waiting to come inside. Dick finally caught on, “Oh, my bad. Want to come in?”

Nodding, he led you inside. You almost fainted while looking at the sheer greatness of the manor.

“Welcome to Wayne Manor!” Dick said, proudly,”I know its a lot to take in at first, but you'll get used to it.”

No I will not. You thought.

“This way to the dining room, if you'd like to take a seat. Alfreds just finishing up lunch.”

So many questions swarmed in your head, Who’s Alfred, Why is their house so big, Where is Damian?

You nodded along, following Dick into the grand dining hall. You didn't know they made tables this long.

Before Dick went to check on lunch, he said, “You can sit anywhere… I'd suggest the last seat on the right, that way you'll be next to Dames.” His tone suggested teasing and you had to restrain yourself from rolling your eyes.

Be polite, you scolded yourself.

Taking a seat, you patiently waited for someone else to come into the room. When the door opened your heart picked up, hoping it was your loving boyfriend.

Alas, it seemed to be another raven haired and ocean eyed man. He seemed to pause when he saw you, confusion masked on his face. “Um, Hello?” He said, gripping his mug tighter towards him.

“Uh, hi?” You said, questioning tone once again.

You watched as the gears turned in his head until a lightbulb went off and he nodded to himself, “You must be (Y/N), right?”

“Yup.” Then, “You are?”

“Tim Drake. Damian's older brother.” How many brothers did Damian have? “The midget will be down soon. I’ll let him know you’re here.”

Midget? Damian was like what? 5’11? Taller than you that is.

Tim left and you were left by your lonesome again. That was until Dick bursts back into the room, a tray of sandwiches in his hand. “It's fine Alfred,” He called into the kitchen, “Don't worry, I got it.”

He then turned to you, “Butlers am I right?”

Not knowing how to respond because you never had one, you nodded along.

“Does PB and J work for you? I know it's Damians favourite and I assumed it would just be yours too, seeing how close you are.”

Your cheeks flared at his words, did they all know you were dating? You thought it was a secret?

“Yes, works with me.” You said with a shaky laugh.

While you and Dick awkwardly made small talk, a bigger commotion was going on upstairs.

“Drake!” Damian pounded on his brother's door. “Drake open this up right now!”

Following Damians commands, Tim walked to his bedroom door, cracking it open, “Yes, Damian?”

The taller though younger brother pushed the door open all the way, stomping into the room. “Why is (Y/N) here?” He hissed.

Tim quirked a brow, folding his arms, “How do you know?”

“Tt,” Damian gave, “I’m not deaf, you imbecile. I heard the car pull up. Who invited her?”

Now, don't get it wrong, Damian was totally ecstatic to see you somewhere other than school, but he was not okay with his whole family being here.

“Me and Dick.” Tim said bluntly.

Damian's glare hardened, “When? Why did you think it was a good idea, you backstabbing al'abalah!”

Tim put his hands up in defence, “Listen. We saw how happy she made you and we just thought it'd be a nice treat to see her in person.”

Damian agreed, it was a nice sentiment, however, why here? “That doesn't excuse you both for betraying my trust. I wanted to keep my relationship private for a reason, Drake.”

His older brother smirked, “Relationship, huh? Thought she was just a classmate.” He teased.

The youngest Wayned groaned and stormed out of the room, racing down the steps.

Your laugh echoed throughout the dining hall. Damian stood in front of the door, smiling with butterflies in his stomach and palms sweaty. He couldn’t believe you were actually at his house.

Opening the door, he heard Dick say something stupid causing your laugh to erupt once more.

Upon opening your eyes, you caught Damians, the two of you staring at each other. Dick smirked and pushed his chair out from under him, “Well,” he started, “Guess this is my cue, have fun you two.”

At that, the man walked out of the dining room, not before giving Damian a wink.

The youngest Wayne rolled his eyes at his brother, then turned back to you.

“(Y/N).” was all he could muster.

“Damian.” You replied.

The teen raced over towards you, immediately grasping your hands and pulling you up from your seat, engrossing you into a hug. “You’re really here.” he whispered into the embrace.

You pulled away, smiling, “I am, my love.” You whispered back.

Damian let go of your hands and took the seat across from you, “I apologize for the odd circumstances of course, this was not how I wished to introduce you to my family.”

Nodding in understanding, you dismissed his apology with a wave, “Damian, it doesn't bother me at all. I quite like your brothers.”

Groaning, Damian spoke, “Can't say the same, beloved. They did plot against me, after all.”

Smirking, you reached across the table, playing with his fingertips, “If they hadn’t, we wouldn't have seen each other today. Maybe you should be thanking them.”

Damian soothed the back of your hand with his thumb, “I would’ve found a way to see you. I can’t stand to live a day without seeing you.”

At his flirtatious words you blushed, “Damian Wayne, you are the only one for me.”

It was his turn to blush, “Same for you beloved.”

You pulled your hand away, lifting the silver cover from your lunch tray, “Good. Now, time for sandwiches or?”

Damian pondered for a moment then, “I have a better idea.”

The two of you sat on a big red blanket, settled down in the front yard of the Manor. While you munched on your freshly made pb and j, Damian sat with Titus in his lap, stroking his fur.

You couldn't help but admire the view, he looked like a prince. Strong jawline, bright green eyes and soft well kept hair, and it was all yours.

You sighed lovingly causing Damian to look over, “Enjoying the view?,” He teased.

Playfully, you rolled your eyes, bringing your arm up to ‘hit’ him.

He caught it, turning your play punch into a handhold.

Brining your grip towards his mouth, he kissed your palm, leaning against the warmth of your hand.

Enjoying the calm and serene moment, the both of you stayed in this position for quite some time, too in love to notice the car pull up.

Inside the Manor, Dick and Tim stood by the large front window, looking out at the scene on the lawn.

“Something wrong boys?”

The two brothers jumped at the voice behind them. There stood Bruce, dressed in business attire, briefcase still in hand as he had just got home from WE.

Tim was the first to speak up, “Yeah actually. Damians smiling.”

Bruce gave his signature bat-smirk at his son, “And that's a problem?” Yes, though it was odd, Bruce found comfort knowing that something in this word could make his angsty teen of a son happy.

Tim looked up at Dick for help, He quickly jumped in, “Of course not Bruce, it's just… odd? We’ve spent years trying to get him to laugh, to smile, anything and then suddenly, he's enjoying himself?”

Bruce could've sworn for the kids he considered intelligent, they sure had no grasp on relationships, platonic or otherwise. The tall man made his way in front of the two, looking out on the lawn.

A smile crept onto his stoic face as he saw Damian, curled up against you, laughing at something you had said. “He’s in love.” Was all Bruce said.

He walked away from the windows, only stopping when he realised his sons were still spying on the couple. “That's enough,” He said, waving them away from the window, “I’m sure you’ve both intervened already, leave the boy be.”

Though Tim and Dick still yearned to watch their little brother fall further and further for you, they listened to their father and backed away from the tall window, closing the curtains.

“They’re gone.” Was all Damian said to you.

Picking your head up from his lap, you furrowed your brows, “Huh?”

“My Brothers,” He explained, “They were spying on us. Though, they are gone now.”

“Oh.” You responded, laying back down.

Damian went to play with your hair, “It is just us now, beloved.”

You hummed in response, loving the feeling of his head massage. Comfortable silence took over the conversation until you felt Damians hand stop.

You looked up at him, confusion on your face, “Something wrong, Dami?”

The teen shook his head, “No, I was just thinking.”

“About?” You pushed.

“Kissing you.” He said bluntly.

Face turning red, you gave out another ‘Oh.’ You sat up once more, turning your body to face him.

“Can I?”

Instead of using your words this time, you lightly placed your hand on the back of his neck and pulled him close, sealing your lips together.

Little did the two of you know, up in the second story study stood Bruce, smiling down at his son from the window.

#damian wayne #older!damian wayne #older!damian wayne x reader #older! damian wayne x reader #damian wayne x reader #batman imagine #batman x reader #batfamily #batfamily imagine #batman

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wonderfulworldofmichaelford · 4 years

Text

Michael in the Mainstream: The Dark Knight Trilogy & Its Negative Impact on the Superhero Genre

Superhero movies have come a very long way in the past couple of decades, cementing themselves as a genre unto themselves rather than the odd action movie here or there. Almost every year a few new ones of varying quality pop up that incite equal parts excitement and derision. It’s definitely a genre people feel very strongly about, but even people who tend to not love superhero films will admit that Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy is fantastic.

From 2005 until 2012, Nolan reinvisioned Batman in a way that grounded the character in reality. There’s no fantastical elements, there’s no insane science, there’s no superpowers… Everything in these films could happen in the real world. In a post-Batman & Robin world, this was seen as a breath of fresh air, and the critics loved it. In particular, The Dark Knight helped to usher in the modern age of superhero films, releasing the same year the MCU kicked off and widely being hailed as one of the greatest films of all time. That’s right, not even superhero films, films period. These films were impressive, groundbreaking, and… they fundamentally ruined superhero movies for quite a while.

Look, I don’t particularly hate these films. I think all of them are pretty good, in their own ways. But they have a lot of glaring issues that really hamper them a fair bit and yet, somehow, they became the blueprint that studios decided to look at for what they thought a successful superhero movie should be. Nolan’s films are serious, brooding, dark, and lack the whimsy and creative insanity that makes comics such a fun and engaging medium, and I think this right here is what has hurt comic book movies the most over the past decade. These are films that feel absolutely ashamed to be comic book movies, and they desperately want to seem like they’re “mature” and for “adults.” And, unfortunately for the rest of us, this shame translated over into a lot of other films, something we’re only just now recovering from.

Looking at the greatest strength of the trilogy shows this issue pretty well, that being the villains. Nolan’s films gave us truly iconic portrayals of characters like Bane, Joker, and Scarecrow, and you’re not gonna hear me say much bad about them. Cillian Murphy, Liam Neeson, Tom Hardy, Anne Hathaway, Aaron Eckhart, and Heath Ledger all do fantastic jobs as the insidious rogues of Batman. But the issue I have is that by grounding these characters in a realistic setting like this, it kind of misses the point. Joker isn’t using exploding cakes and laughing gas, Ra’s al Ghul isn’t an immortal warrior, Bane isn’t a drugged-up super soldier… They’re all just Guys. They’re Guys With Gimmicks, yes, but at the end of the day they aren’t what should be looked at as the be-all, end-all of the character’s portrayals.

And yet everyone acts like no one should ever play Joker again, because Heath Ledger’s Joker was just so good, guys! And he was good, but I don’t think Ledger’s Joker should be the absolute final Joker ever. Quite frankly, I prefer Phoenix’s Joker, because even if that version is also in a rather grounded film missing the overt weirdness of comics for the most part, he still dresses in a colorful costume, acts weird, tells jokes, and is in general more Jokery. Out of all of these villains, I think Bane and Scarecrow at least come within the ballpark of being close to how they should be, but Scarecrow is horribly underutilized and Bane is given a rather undignified sendoff.

Then there are the bigger issues. Batman himself is really downplayed throughout the trilogy, getting fairly little screentime compared to villains and side characters. This was a huge point of contention when The Dark Knight Rises came out, with most of the film featuring Bruce Wayne, and in hindsight it highlights how unwilling Nolan was to engage with the comic book trappings of what he was adapting. I like Christian Bale a lot, he’s a great actor, but I don’t think he really carries any of the films; in fact, it’s usually the villains carrying the movies. Bale is certainly not as bad as Val Kilmer in the role of Wayne/Batman, but he’s no Keaton, he’s no Clooney, he’s not even an Affleck. A lot of the time, he also just feels like… a Guy. And Batman should not ever, ever just be a Guy.

But perhaps the most egregious fault of the films is what it did to Gotham City itself. In Burton’s films, you really get a feel for the Gothic atmosphere of the city with how it’s designed, and this goes for Batman: The Animated Series too. And even the more cartoonish, colorful Gotham of Schumacher’s films pops and leaves an impact. But Nolan’s Gotham? It’s very much just a City. There is nothing distinct about Nolan’s Gotham, it’s literally just a generic city, and if you even have the faintest knowledge of Batman you will know that Gotham is not just a city. Gotham is pretty much a character itself, a dark, imposing landscape in which Batman does battle with his costumed foes. Every other adaptation I can think of knows to make Gotham feel unique and distinct, but this one just absolutely drops the ball. You might as well just have the city be New York if you’re going to put no effort into giving it personality.

And that all brings me to this: every reviled superhero movie of the past decade, from F4ntastic to The Amazing Spider-Man to Dawn of Justice, all have their genesis in Nolan’s trilogy. He laid the groundwork for these films to exist, and a large majority of the blame needs to be put on Nolan for sapping the fun out of comic book movies. Now, to be totally fair to Nolan, he’s not entirely responsible for what happened to the comic book film landscape; prior to him, the X-Men film series was giving all of the heroes dark costumes and being a bit more serious. But despite those films playing a bit of a part, there’s one major reason I don’t fault them nearly as much: The X-Men films never once felt ashamed to be comic book movies.

You have to understand, people loved grit and edginess in the 90s and had just violently rejected Batman & Robin a few years prior to the original X-Men film, so it’s hard to really fault it for wanting to avoid being too campy. But much like Blade, the films never tried to act like they weren’t still crazy comic book films. Scott still has eye lasers, Mystique is still blue, Nightcrawler looks like a demon, there are Sentinels and Apocalypse and even Dazzler shows up at one point! The X-Men franchise wasn’t always good, but it managed to balance between being silly and taking itself seriously pretty well for the most part. Magneto is still a Holocaust survivor, his relationship with Xavier still has impact, there are still emotional moments here and there, but then you also have Deadpool movies and the multiple comic book style retcons to the timeline that leave the continuity a mess, and something about that just feels right. And all that makes Logan less egregious despite being the sort of brooding, angsty superhero drama Nolan would make, because even if it is those things, it still centers around a dude with metal claws coming out of his hands trying to stop his best friend from wiping out everyone with psychic seizures. Nolan could never make this superhero film.

Nolan’s films, on the other hand, did. These films did not feel like they wanted to be comic book movies, they felt like they wanted to be serious crime films but Nolan was stuck with Batman so he just mashed the two together. And honestly, I’d probably be more forgiving if it weren’t for the hugely negative impact these films and their critical success had on the superhero genre even until this day. The first decade of superhero films as a major contender in cinema were colored by these films. People outright balked at silliness in superhero movies for quite some time, with a lot of criticism levied at the early phases of the MCU for being too goofy; in fact, at times it seemed as if the MCU was going a bit too far in the goofy direction without striking the proper balance, with films like Age of Ultron having most of its tension defused by constant wisecracks. And on the DC side, Nolan’s grounded approach lead to Zack Snyder’s flaccid filmmaking with dark coloration, moody atmosphere, and not a shred of joy to be found. Nolan is essentially the peak of dark, grounded superhero films, and Snyder is the nadir, but Snyder’s awful DC films wouldn’t exist if not for Nolan.

It was a slow crawl getting to what superhero movies should be. Guardians of the Galaxy and Ant-Man were films tossed out only when Marvel was certain they could take risks, because absurd concepts like those would just not have been able to survive if not for years of good will beforehand. That’s not even getting into some of the more bonkers elements of later films, such as Ego the Living Planet and basically everything about Doctor Strange. In fact, Doctor Strange, for all its issues, is still a massive step forward for a genre that outright rejected magic for a long time, instead for a time turning Thor and his costars into a cast of hyper-advanced aliens, with later films having to clarify that there is magic and zombies and so on. The recent WandaVision was able to further clarify this by making Wanda unambiguously magic and not an evil Nazi science experiment.

Superhero animation didn’t suffer quite so much, but that’s mostly because, much like comics, animation is still seen as “kid’s stuff” by way too many people. And even then, they didn’t escape the shadow of Nolan totally unscathed; one need only look into the infamous Bat Embargo, which limited Batman villains so there could only be one given incarnation of said character in media. For instance, the Scarecrow being in Batman Begins meant he could not appear in the animated series The Batman. This lead to such things as no Batman characters appearing in Justice League Unlimited. It was truly a stupidly frustrating time to be a Batman fan when some of his most iconic foes were relegated to only certain appearances because it “might confuse kids.”

Let me again clarify this: I mostly like the Nolan films. I usually like Nolan, though he has become unbearably, obnoxiously pretentious these days. I think a lot of elements of them are great, I feel like they mostly have strong villains, and I don’t disagree that The Dark Knight is a fantastic film. But the thing is these are only good as AU stories, as their own thing; they should not be the template every superhero movie should follow, or any superhero movie for that matter, because they lack the ability to engage with the things that make people love comics in the first place. People love wacky, off-the-wall concepts, superpowered aliens, magic, talking animals, evil living planets, alcoholic ducks, and all that fun stuff.

People desperately want the fun, camp, and wacky stuff back in comic book films, as the success of the goofier DC films like Aquaman, Shazam, and Birds of Prey as well as the success of shows like Doom Patrol in comparison to the critical and audience revulsion of Snyder’s films, with Shazam in particular giving us such bonkers concepts as an entire family of superpowered children and Mr. Mind, the evil alien caterpillar. Thor: Ragnarok and the Guardians of the Galaxy films have become some of the most beloved MCU movies despite being weird, wacky, and wholly embracing the joy of comics to the point the latter films feature Howard the Duck and the aforementioned Ego alongside bizarre characters like Rocket Raccoon, Groot, and Taserface. And the thing with all of these films is that they’re able to balance the weirdness and wackiness of comics without losing sight of human emotion, moving storytelling, and drama. They’re both fun and deep, goofy and yet meaningful. This is what comics are, and what they should be, and anyone who thinks comics should be grim and gritty really needs to think about why they think an entire genre needs to be colored in with only the dullest colors.

I think what I’m trying to say here is this: Make a Detective Chimp movie, you cowards.

#Michael in the Mainstream #mitm #review #movie review #the dark knight trilog #the dark knight #batman begin #the dark knight rises #superhero movie #christopher nolan #DC

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whumpbby · 4 years

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With the sickly au!Jason fics and such, what would Damians reaction to Jason be? This could be reverse Robins if you want. Or it could be that Jay never really got better, he was never Robin, more like what Oracle is.

Aw man, a sickly little Jay picked up by the reverse-WaynesTT

Bruce found him in the streets as usual and brought him home - because at this point he already had Damian and Tim, and Duke was his Oracle, and Steph was the budding Batgirl (Say, he was adopted by the Commish and Babs’ older bro who didn’t know about his powers - yet;]) and he was used to kid-acquisition, okay? He knew how it went - he’d try for a moment to pretend he’ll give them out to some other good family, only to inevitably end up with the kid back under his wing, because he was a man who couldn’t let go;]

So, to skip the charade, he brought Jay back to the Manor. Damian was picking up the slack of angsty Red Bat with the Titans, Tim was back from the dead and causing chaos, Duke was tortured by the Joker and barely escaped with his life (and maybe-maybe-not discovered he wasn’t quite human) and Steph had a little mute tagalong she couldn’t seem to shake, and Bruce needed something to focus on - something that was good, and normal, something he could help with.

It wasn’t Robins Bat needed, after all, it was the children behind them - the family he could return to at the end of the day, softness he could feel without pain of tragic memories. Help he could give to someone without it turning sour.

And Jay needed help - a small thing, he needed food and warmth, and medical care. Heck, Tim was a small kid when Bruce adopted him, but Jay was beating him here - Tim was just slender, but well-feed, Jay was malnourished and wasted by a never-quite-healed pneumonia. Living in the cold and damp did a number on his respiratory system, knocking out his bronchi and sinuses, rendering him asthmatic and nah, Bruce wasn’t going to hand the kid over to the services in that state - at this point he already knew he couldn’t trust them.

So, Jay got his own room and Alfred took to his medical care with gusto - the man also needed something to focus on, the issue with Tim was painful for everyone. And Jay was starting to believe his luck might have turned finally for the better.

So, it was Steph who saw him first - he was asleep on the couch after a rather tiring bout of sickness, swaddled in blankets and flushed with fever (Alfred allowed him to spend the day downstairs so the boy wouldn’t be alone and was easier to keep an eye on). She was back form a patrol, walking to the kitchen for a snack, wiping her hair after a shower and speaking loudly to Alfred - when the man peeked out of the kitchen and gave her the most powerful ‘shush’ in his arsenal.

Only then she noticed the bundle on the couch - a fine detective she was, huh - and her first reaction was “Is he freaking serious?!” and the second was “Wow, he’s a little cutie, isn’t he? We didn’t have a redhead yet!”

(in this au Jay had red hairXD)

From there Duke was send photos (because of course he was) and was “Oh no, I will protect this baby with my life!” because he’s a good guy and his older-brother instincts were rock-solid.

Damian learned about his newest sibling when he returned to the Manor for Alfred’s birthday (they were at odds with Bruce at the time) and saw the slip of a child hiding in the corner of the kitchen, watching Damian give Alfred his best wishes. His instant reaction was anger (because it was his go-to reaction in most cases at the time) and poor Jay ran away scared. Alfred was not impressed.

It took a bit of time for the kid to stop fearing the big scary man - Bruce was big, but he was soft and not scary at all. Damian was big and tough and had a perma-frown and Jay saw him on some portraits int he Manor, but in person he was more imposing than the boy from the pictures.

Damian was unhappy about another stray his father brought home. At least Staph had all her vaccinations! (To which Steph threatened to lick his face while he was sleeping, because that was the relationship they had). That sickly little thing was going to die on the streets! He was in no way going to be Robin!

But Bruce didn’t want another Robin. He wanted to give this child a good home and education and future. Yeah, Jay was very poorly and it was doubtful that he’d ever be strong enough for the feats of athleticism their job required, and that was okay, he didn’t need to be. If he ever learned their secrets, it would be one thing, he’d never go out into the field. He could be like Duke, who stepped away form Robining when he became a fulltime older brother and decided that he could do more good for Batman and his dad behind the screen.

(Damnit, now I want Damian and Duke to have this relationship of equals where Dami was the Robin and Duke was the Bitgirl Black Bat and they are grown up now and have this cordial brotherly bond where Duke is not afraid to verbally trash Damian when necessary and Damian pretends to ignore him, but always takes his advice into consideration, and they both roll heir eyes at Bruce and his drama, and they’re both shattered over what happened to Tim, and they have each-other’s back, and it was Duke who taught Damian to stand the fuck still when someone hugs him)

So, Damian now had to creep back into his baby brother’s good graces, because somehow Alfred took the boy under his wing and one needed to keep the Butler sweet. And okay, Jay was a good kid, smart, eloquent, scared of being abandoned, desperately needing a family. He liked halva. He was okay. And it was good to have a baby bother again, to have some life back in the Manor, to have Bruce smile again from time to time over aced report cards and books stacked neatly next to the couch.

One day, a few months in, Damian came back home with a present for his newest sibling.

He brought Jay a cat.

#headcanon #reverse!robins #baby!jay #duke&dami #man i want that #Anonymous

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silvadraconis · 4 years

Text

Wanted to write a bit more about my Mastersona Silva, and some of her general feelings through the later singularities! Buckle up cause this is gonna be a bit angsty XD

also adding these here in case anyone wants more info on who she is and what her deal is!

Her Backstory!

Trivia!

(and also gonna tag some peeps, i dunno if i should keep tagging ya’ll but you guys seem to like XD if it gets annoying please tell me)

@panyum @xviicprc @tricketra

America

That's where things started to really hit hard

Up until that point, things had been hard sure, there had been some rough moments, but everyone always managed to pull through for the most part.

But America

The failed assassination

Silva had had a bad feeling about it when they set off, but shook it off, "They'll be fine, I'm sure of it!" she thought to herself, and resolved to focus on their part

But when Robin came back, alone, and told everyone what all had happened, what all had been lost

It was like getting hit with a truck

And one word kept repeating in the back of her mind

Sacrifice

*Nononono this wasn't supposed to be like this!* she thought *I'm the one who should be at the forefront! I'm the one who should be taking the risks! I'm the one who's living one borrowed time!!*

Over and over in her mind as new plans were made, moral was bolstered again, and eventually, came to the final confrontation, where again, some would have to be sent off, to hold off the pillars, while they dealt with Cu

All that was going on in her mind as the fight raged, and she shoved her all into the battle against Cu

Sacrifice

Camelot

The villagers at the gate, Arash, Da Vinci, entire villages of people

More and more that she couldn't stop, again and again despite her best efforts

Sacrifice

Babylonia

A desperate struggle against what seemed like the whole world, more and more given to the fight, and more the fight demanded

"500 is more than nothing" Said a king to them on top of that building "500 is something"

And it was

*But it's not enough!!!* She wanted to scream, what was the point of it all if they couldn't save everyone, if they couldn't fix things, why was she here if she couldn't stop this?!

Sacrifice

Solomon

Friends and allies alike come in force to help push back the end of the world, everyone they'd met along the way, again it tore at her, but she knew that there wasn't any other choice, they had to finish this, had to get to the end, they had to finish this

They made it, with the help of their allies, and even more unexpected friends at the last terminal

They made it to the throne

But it wasn't enough

Ripping and tearing and clawing and it wasn't enough

Mash

Mash…

Sacrifice

Again and again

They wouldn't go down, but they couldn't win, even with seemingly everything given, desperately pushing against the impossible

And when it almost seemed like the end

Nonono

Not you too

Roman

The man who'd be there since the beginning, who'd been by all their sides, who'd made calculations on the fly to account for their impossible existence, who had lead everyone when he never asked for it

The man, who it turned out, never had a chance at a normal life

Whos one wish was denied, as soon as it was granted, taken away by his future sight

And now

Sacrifice

With Romans last gift to humanity, they fought

They fought and they tore and they clawed

Gave everything ripped through everything

So many up to this point

*I will carry your memory, I won't let it be in vain!*

And against all odds, against seemingly the whole world

They did it

They won

Racing back they struggled to make it to chaldea

Only to be stopped again

"...My sworn enemy. My hatred. My destiny.

I want you to witness this.

This brief moment is now my story."

And carrying the memories of all that had come before

They understood, and agreed

"I WILL WITNESS YOU!"

A last fight, a meaningless fight, a rage against their fleeting existence

Oh she understood very well

And swore once it was done, to carry their memory as well

A small proof, the only proof, of their existence

Time went on, Remnants popped up when things were supposed to be finished, but they were quashed just as swiftly, but more and more she found that despite everything, there were times where they were just as helpless as back then, helpless to do nothing but watch as others were slaughtered around them

In shinjuku, refusing to leave behind and abandon anyone

"I don't care if its a city of fakes, you're here now, I won't leave you, I won't abandon you, and when this is done I won't forget you"

Shimosa. Hiding in that hay pile took everything she had and then some, biting their lip so hard that they tasted blood as they were forced to listen to the screams

Salem, struggling to watch as their friends and innocent villagers alike were brought to the gallows as she could do nothing but watch

Sacrifice

The remnants were defeated though, and finally, it seemed as though, things were coming to the end

She was a bit frightened, but had accepted it as best she could

"Now that the world isn't ending, I won't be needed anymore. Will I disappear? Should I disappear? Where will I go?"

Turns out these questions never mattered

As she watched everything around her fall apart

As once again she heard screams in Chaldea

As they rushed to the hangar under the guidance of Sherlock, reassuring he'd go after survivors, knowing we'd never leave otherwise. Mash struggling to maintain her servant form as we ran

And as we get there over the intercom, Gordolf

The pompous prick who Silva was going to be happy to leave before everything went to hell

Pleading for someone, anyone

Her and Guada agreed that they couldn't leave him, not again, not anyone again if they could help it

But it cost them

Saving him allowed that priest to catch up

And Da Vinci…

Sacrifice

Bading us to run as she held him there

And run we did

We had no choice

And as they ran she watched the world and timeline she clawed and bleed and cried for, struggled against the entire world for, vanish at the words of the crypters

Everything was gone

As Guada held mash back comforted her

Silva was seething

Plagued by one question

Why

Why destroy everything that everyone had given so much for

Why tear down what some had given everything for

"We're going to fix this" She told mash, almost to herself as well "We've fixed the timeline before and we'll do it again, we haven't come this far, and lost this much to give it all away to some chumps with a god on their side. We're going to fix this, one way or another"

And that is the promise and the creed that she's been holding through the lost belts

More and more moments that only they will remember

"I promise to witness you" a promise after the first lostbelt

A promise to remember

And an unyielding rage and fury against those who caused this, those who tore down and destroyed everything that everyone fought so hard for

All for the sake of possible timelines that had already been proven to fail

Everything erased for their chance at being gods, at being the heros, or whatever reasoning they each have

She doesn't care, she'll hear it and remember it, but there is no excuse

She does not fault the lost belts for fighting, does not anger at their retaliation

"I will witness you"

But she wont stop, she cant stop. She will keep fighting for what was won until she can't fight anymore

"We will not go gentle into that good night, so rage, rage, against the dying of the light"

#mastersona #fgo #fate grand order #i feel like a kid walking into an art gallery goin #look i made a picture too #to all these freakin masters #just #hallo you guys have very cool sonas i also have a sona would you like to see?#again please tell me if you dont want me taggin you in my stuffs

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nekojitachan · 5 years

Note

For the ask meme thing, circus au, with marriage proposals or braiding/brushing hair. (Although I am parshal to a non angsty "it's not you, it my enemies, because, well its *Neil*)

*******

Last one!

Ha, this turned out more like an actual story?

Hmm… well, the last one had braiding hair in it so….

Very brief references to violence and a tiny bit of gore (not explicit), fair warning.

*******

Andrew is content as is possible for him (or so he thinks), traveling with the Foxes’ Court circus; he has his brother and cousin with him, the others know to leave him and his alone, it’s a different city every week or so, and it’s the safest he’s been in his life.

He helps set up and tear down the tents as well as handle any customers who get out of hand, while Aaron assists Abby, the crew’s healer, and Nicky helps draw in the crowds. They each have a job they do well, have found a place in Wymack’s ragtag crew of Foxes.

And then the bleeding heart bastard had to go and hire a new animal tamer.

Neil Josten arrived with a bag strapped to his back, two large felines (a black panther and a mountain lion) and such a strong aura of danger that set Andrew’s nerves on edge at mere sight of the young man.

Nicky said it was just his hormones reacting to a major hottie and nearly got stabbed.

The majority of the Foxes were their usual idiot selves and fawned over their newest recruit, desperate to get Neil to reveal something about himself, but not Andrew. He noticed how Neil was careful to never let any real details about his past slip, how his black hair had an odd sheen to it at times, how the dark strands normally fell onto his (too attractive) face to hide his (too pretty) pale blue eyes, and how he never went without his costume’s mask when the circus was open to paying customers.

How well he treated his overgrown pets (Sir and King, what ridiculous names) and put up with a prattling, attention-starved Nicky.

There was a lot of downtime when the circus wasn’t putting on a show, so Andrew took to hanging out around Neil (normally found with his cats when not dragged off by Matt or Allison). At first Neil ignored him, but when the mountain lion (Sir) showed an interest in Andrew (surprisingly not to eat him), Neil enlisted Andrew’s help with the oversized furballs.

While he pitched in to clean their enclosures, feed them and (safely) play with them, Andrew and Neil exchanged a few simple truths – Andrew being fostered out while an infant, Neil traveling around with his mother, who taught him how to raise and train the cats, various likes and dislikes. He pondered how to get to the real truths (who the hell are you?) when there started to be little ‘accidents’ around the circus.

Accidents like rigging coming loose, one of Dan’s horses escaping its stall, Robin realizing that the safety net for the trapeze act wasn’t set up properly….

Odd how it all started after Neil joined.

Odd how Neil grew withdrawn and took to walking around at night with his cats.

Andrew ‘allowed’ his coworker his space at first; after they set up in Binghamton, he snuck out one night to follow Neil and the cats at a distance, only to watch them run between the tents where Bee read cards and Abby sold her potions. There was an odd sound similar to a choked-off cry, which made Andrew curse and burst into a run himself, visions of Neil being harmed in his head as he rounded the corner to find….

To find King mauling some stranger while Sir batted around… something that had once been attached to said stranger. Andrew gulped then scowled at Neil, who was poking around in a leather bag, and felt a return of that ‘danger’ sense when the bastard smiled at him.

He ended up helping to bury a mauled body that night.

Still, unwanted exertion aside, it helped to break the rest of the ice with Neil, who apologized while shoveling and told Andrew that it wasn’t him making Neil so standoffish, but his enemies. It seemed that he and his mother had really been on the run all those years from his powerful and abusive father, and she’d trained the cats to protect Neil.

She’d managed to kill his father a couple years ago (and died in the process), but some of his people were still after Neil – not many, but some. So he continued to run and hide, and picked them off one by one when they came after him. He’d seen the advert for the circus and, tired of running, thought why not try something new?

After that, things changed between Andrew and Neil (funny what burying a body together could do to a relationship). Andrew told Neil more about his childhood (about the abusive foster homes – not everything, but Neil was smart and figured things out after a while, especially after the ‘please’ truth), spent more time together until Sir allowed Andrew to groom him and feed him by hand.

Until Andrew dared to ask Neil ‘yes or no’ and be told ‘yes’, and discover that Neil could be as careful with him, as mindful of boundaries with him as he was with the damn cats.

The Foxes Court traveled around the country and put on show after show, and every couple months Andrew had to help bury a body (he didn’t understand why Neil didn’t let the damn furballs eat everything, and was told it wasn’t good for them – well, being up half the night burying a pile of shredded human wasn’t good for him… at least Neil made up for it during the rest of the night).

It was during their show outside of Belmonte when the Malcolms struck – the last two loyal followers of Neil’s father. Neil had gone to check on the cats one more time before bed, when Andrew heard a faint knock on the door.

It turned out to be Renee, who’d noticed something ‘odd’ while on her way back from returning something to Dan, and so she’d come to Andrew. Suspecting what that ‘odd’ was, Andrew slipped free a knife and went in search of his wayward boyfriend. Renee, who hadn’t always been the darling of the trapeze (more like the terror of the slums back when she’d been Natalie Shields), quickly followed.

The Malcolms had Neil trapped between them, right outside of the cats’ enclosure; he had managed to fend them off until then, not exactly defenseless without his cats to back him up.

Andrew and Renee were more than adequate substitutes for the furballs.

Renee, the bitch, left without helping to bury the bodies.

Neil was in a bit of a daze for the next few days as it sunk in that with the Malcolms dead, he should finally be free of pursuit from his father’s people. Andrew waited on tenterhooks to see if he’d leave the circus and settle down somewhere, and when a week passed finally worked up the nerve to do something.

He marched into the cats’ enclosure where Neil was grooming King and stood in front of his boyfriend. At first he tried to ignore Sir, who leaned against him and demanded that his ears be rubbed, but it was difficult to do that with such a large cat so he obliged while glaring at Neil and asking the gorgeous idiot to move in with him.

To share the same caravan.

Neil might have only been with the circus for about a year, but he knew what it meant when a couple officially shared the same caravan; he gaped at Andrew for several seconds before he stuttered out if Andrew was sure, if it was a joke or not – and got yanked forward.

Andrew said he was not joking, and asked ‘yes or no’. After a slight pause, Neil smiled, a truly beautiful sight to behold, and said ‘yes’ before he leaned in for a kiss, one which Andrew savored right up until they both went down beneath the weight of two overgrown, purring furballs.

*******

Ah, I had fun with these.

#nekojitachanfics #fantasy mashup prompt #aftg #andreil #neil josten #andrew minyard #circus au #sir and king!#sorta #proposal!#renee walker #courting your loved one through the burial of bodies #mumbling into the void #i think we all can agree that i have issues #but that's fine because these boys have issues too

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writtingfiction · 5 years

Note

Hiya! Is it alright if I asked an angsty Chrobin? Like Robin attends Chrom's wedding despite having deep feelings for him. She hopes oneday they'll be together in a better life. Timeskipped to modern-day, Chrom is in love with Robin except Robin is in love with somebody else.

Alrighty! Your story has arrived and is filled with angst! All a board the angst train with my first story back!ヾ(´▽｀;)ゝ

pairing: Chrom x Robin

words: 1.7k

Robin breathed in deeply, eyes closed and hands palming at the dress that hugged her. It was quiet with the exception of footsteps scurrying by her door every once in a while. She opened her eyes, seeing the regal purple dress that reached her ankles, with a slit for easy movement. Her white hair pulled back into bun with a borrowed accessory from Lissa shimmering in the light. Where a smile should be, there’s a frown.

She tried again, eyes closed once more, hands relaxing at her side, relaxing her tense muscles and breathed in slowly. Trying to not let the emotions take her, trying not to think about him, to not think about him standing at that altar smiling widely as can be, not to think about how it could have been her walking to him in that long white dress. Trying not to think about how it could have been her wearing that wedding dress being wed to the love of her life. Robin exhaled, brown eyes locked with her own in the mirror.

“Robin…!” Lissa gasped. Robin flinched, muscles tensing at hearing the princess’ voice. “Oh, sorry for scaring you, but you’re magnificent!” Robin couldn’t help the blush on her cheeks, hand over her heart.

“Thank you, Lissa. Is it time already?”

“Oh no, Chrom has asked for you though. Needed to see you ASAP. Come on, I’ll take you to him.” Lissa said and all Robin could feel was nervous. She cursed herself for being so nervous, she was only going to speak to him, but there was a sickening thought in the back of her mind, she wouldn’t dare delve further into it.

She stood in front of Chrom’s door a little quicker than anticipated but she swallowed the rising feelings and words and knocked on his door. She bid Lissa a small wave when he called her in. She closes the door behind her before her eyes see Chrom. He looked handsome in the fitted suit, dashing. He took the air out of her lungs without even trying.

“Robin…” He said in an airy relieved voice, making her stomach do flips. “I’m so glad you’re here, how do I look? Ok?”

“You look amazing.” Robin said. Chrom smiled.

“Good, and one more thing, I was wondering if you could…” Chrom trailed off and it made her heart race. The hope of him saying that he’s pressured into marrying his fiancé and would rather take her instead. It comes quick and fills her with anticipation, however she should know better by now. “If you could become my advisor, our advisor. Olivia knows how important you are to me, and me to you. We wouldn’t have it any other way.” She should really know better than to hope at all.

“What?” She says in slight shock, trying to play off the broken heart she still had.

“Become our advisor, Robin. Your intellect of the battlefield and your smarts on books will give the Ylissian court great boon.” Chrom said, hands resting upon her shoulders. However, his words make her giggle.

“‘A great boon’? You never cared much for the Ylissian court before.”

“Yes, yes, I know but I’m going to be forced too soon enough.” Chrom’s response made her smile, heart aching the entire time.

“Take this whole Exalt thing at your own pace, everyone will support you. They know you’ll treat this country with great care.” Robin said with a wide smile. Chrom’s smile makes her weak, and she knows she has to leave soon, the clock is ticking.

She soon leaves Chrom so he can prep for the wedding as she makes her way to sit in her seat. Heart heavy, and breaking further when she see’s Olivia in the white dress, red face visible through the veil. However, when it’s removed and Olivia’s eyes make contact with Chrom’s, she knows that nothing else mattered right where they stood. She knew the feeling, looking at him made everything else disappear. Her hands curled into fists as she realized how happy he looked in Olivia’s presence. She couldn’t compete, but perhaps in another lifetime. Perhaps she could win then, win over his heart before someone else could.

Even with Chrom and Olivia making and promising their vows, she wouldn’t interfere. If they were happy, so would she. After all, it’s all she wants, for him to be happy even it can’t be her.

— — —

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“I don’t know, this seems a little odd to me.” Robin sighed heavily as she looked towards Chrom. She wore a deep purple dress that reached her knees, the long sleeves with a fancy lace covering them. Her white hair pinned up into a bun, a light makeup covering her face.

“You say that every time. You’re turning into an older brother.”

“That’s because I am!!” Chrom cried out. “You do know you can stay here tonight watch a movie with me? Doesn’t that sound like a more eventful night?”

“You’re saying that because you don’t want me to go out.” Chrom pouted at her witty response, maybe that was the truth. Perhaps he didn’t want her to go out with him, that stranger, because staying the night in with him would be more eventful. He could make her feel more at home and comfortable than any other guy could. At least, that’s what he hoped for.

“Maybe, besides why put the effort to impress someone else, when you can stay here and not worry about putting on a forced smile?” Chrom said and Robin turns from her mirror to face him with a firm look.

“Chrom. I’m going out and you can either wait up for me, or go to sleep and I’ll tell you about it in the morning.” Robin said as the doorbell rang. She grabs her purse and pats his shoulder as she makes her way towards the front door.

Chrom follows in behind, heart aching as he watches her slip on her shoes and take one final look in the mirror before opening the door. Chrom’s heart immediately shatters upon seeing her date; it was Lon’qu. That shy man he had seen Lissa hang out with time to time. He was so sure, that those two had a connection. How wrong he was.

“Chrom?” Lon’qu spoke up, spotting the blue haired male from the doorway.

“Lon’qu! What a surprise!” Chrom said with a wide smile, but he did not move an inch to greet him. He stayed glued to where he was, leaning against the wall. He did notice the way Robin’s lips pulled into a wider smile.

“You live here?” Lon’qu said. Chrom gave a firm nod, lips sealed shut.

“We live together here, we’ve known each other since High school.” Robin explained and Lon’qu nodded stiffly. Chrom bit down on his tongue as Robin put on her coat and waved him a goodbye as the two left for the evening.

When that door closed, his fists balled up and he breathed in heavily. He could see the way her eyes lit up when she saw that they knew each other. The smile when the two of them interacted. She knew that Chrom knew Lon’qu, and would most likely approve of the man, but it was just the opposite. No one would be good enough in his eyes unless it was him, but he couldn’t hold onto that ideal for too long. He’d have to spit up his feelings soon enough. Maybe when she gets back, he’ll say something.

So, he waits, watching TV, playing games, texting, eating, doing something until she came back. The clock ticks slowly for him, minute by minute he’s constantly checking his phone waiting for Robin to text him and say that the date isn’t going well and she needs him, but it never comes. He hopes that she isn’t enjoying Lon’qu’s company too much, it made his heart ache at the thought that she might like him.

He wanted to be the one that made her smile. He wanted to be the person where he could cheer her up with a simple hug. He wanted to be by her side while she paved her way through her life. He wanted to be able to wake up to someone that was his other half. His other half that just completed him in so many different ways. He sighed heavily, eyes locked on the clock.

10:35

How much longer? How much longer until she comes home? How much longer will he have to wait for her? Biting at his lip, he knew he would confess to her tonight cause he can’t handle it anymore. He knew tonight would be a good idea, because this date will just be like all the others. There was no spark between the two of them and he would comfort her, and confess. Give her time and space and then see her response. He hopes that she’ll return the feelings, he knows she’s happy in his presence. He knows that he makes her happy, but is it enough?

He hears laughter outside the front door before it opens. He barely hears what they says as they say goodnight. He feels heavy when he hears the door close and hears Robin sigh dreamily. He picks himself up from the couch though, needing to see.

“Chrom!” Robin says and her entire image hits him hard. She’s practically glowing in the light. Brown eyes sparkling with happiness, smile wider than he’s ever seen and he feels so lost. “You won’t believe the night I had. Listen to this…” And he listens, mouth shut as he watches her walk into the home they shared, hands flailing to explain how amazing the night was. Lighting up even further when she talked about him.

All Chrom could feel was his heart sink to his feet. Realizing that he had no chance against Lon’qu and it had made him spiral. He thought, he could be the one where Robin talks excitedly about him and would never tire, but it looks like it isn’t him.

A small smile appears on his lips as he listens to Robin continuing her explanation of her night. He can’t help but feel sad, however, at least she’s happy. It’s all he wants after all, for her to be happy, even if it can’t be him. For that’s how reality works, it’s unfair.

#request #chrom x robin #robin x chrom #chrom #chrom fire emblem #robin fire emblem #chrobin #fire emblem #fire emblem awakening #robin #angst #angst train #not my greatest works but at least im putting something out #first story of 2020 #noice

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divine17 · 5 years

Text

↳ LOVE HER TOO | MASTERLIST

Fandom: Stranger Things

Request: “hey!! could you make steve x fem!reader where robin has a crush on steve’s girlfriend (reader) and robin gets drunk and tells steve this ! tyyy” - Anon

Warnings: Sadness/angst but slightly inspirational if you squint, a minor consuming a loooot of alcohol, minor ripoff of robin’s coming out scene (you decide whether or not that happened already or if this is that), i accidentally used some arctic monkey’s lyrics somewhere in here, that’s probably it

Word Count: 2123

A/N: this is actually kinda angsty/sad because i have no clue at all what direction you wanted this to go in so... i made it sad. because that’s what i do best.

“Your girlfriend...” Robin hiccuped, her gaze falling to the tiled floor. Her knees pressed up against her chest, her arms around them. She knew she should’ve been nervous as she internally prepared to spill her heart out to the brunette boy, but the warm alcohol coursing through her veins prevented that. She knew that she shouldn’t be doing this, that she’d regret it in the morning. Her newfound friendship with Steve would be ruined, most likely. But the liquid courage which she’d consumed (in an absolutely obscene amount) certainly didn’t want to let her hold back.

Robin wasn’t even completely, absolutely, one hundred percent sure how she ended up here, sitting in the kitchen floor of Steve Harrington’s parents house. She was at a party, some girl who works in the food court in the mall had invited her. Then she ditched her, not a word, no “Sorry, I can’t make it,” nothing. So while she was there, Robin decided to drink. Drink until she couldn’t feel the confines of her body anymore, drink until she was having a good time in the stuck-up party, drink until she forgot about the girl completely. Next thing she knew, her Scoops coworker was roping through the crowd to find her, gently taking her wrist and leading her back to his dark red car. She remembered being excited to see him at first, then annoyed that he made her put down her cup. Frustrated when he told her she was in too deep, but excited when he promised her a cheeseburger when she was sober. Delirious, yet relieved, when he told her that she was going to stay the night at his so her parents didn’t see her like this.

Steve took her into his house, silently thankful that his own parents were away for a couple days. Not that they’d care notice, much less care, that he had a drunk girl in the floor, but still. That’s one thing that he’d rather not have to explain. He gave her one of his t-shirts and a pair of boxers and a hair tie, taking her clothes that smelled of that too-familiar scent of vodka and sweat and putting them in the wash. She changed clothes and disappeared, and found her shortly after sitting on the cold tile. So, naturally, he sat down opposite her. Both were silent until she spoke, asking about his girlfriend. Odd.

“Y/N? What about her?”

“You know... Do you remember when I told you about Mrs. Click’s class? At work, the other day? About me being jealous, and... obsessed? it was never because I had a crush on you, Steve. I just want you to know that.”

“Robin, you don’t have to-“

“It was because you had her. You had Y/N. She looked at you, and she still does, like you’re her whole world. Like you’re the only person she sees, the only one she cares about. She only had eyes for you. I was so mad, so upset, that of all people, she was with King Steve, ‘The Hair’ Harrington. I didn’t think she deserved you.”

“Robin, let’s talk about this when you’re sober...” He tried to stop her, to keep her from spilling her guts or saying something she might regret. But the girl just kept on, not even slowing down to listen to him speak. So instead, he listened to her drunken ramblings, morbidly curious. His curiosity would kill him one day, he was sure.

“I was mad because I wanted her to look at me like that. Iike I was the only person she wanted, or would ever want. I wanted her to hold my hand between classes, sneaking kisses in the stairwell before school started.”

“And I just didn’t understand why... Why she loved you like that, why she looked at you like that. All the heart eyes and rosy cheeks when you talked to her. And I really just didn’t get it. You were so messy, you always asked dumb questions and passed notes around in class. You partied hard on the weekends and did stupid stuff. But she stayed home, cleaning up your messes every single time you got into something you shouldn't have. I just didn’t understand why she stuck with you through all that, and then I realized...

“Steve, she does all of that because she loves you. She loves you so much that she was willing to put up with all of your shit just to be with you.”

“I know.” His head dropped, not able to look her in the eye, knowing she was right. He should probably be mad, frustrated, upset that she just confessed her crush for his girlfriend. But he felt everything but those emotions. Steve knew Robin was right. He didn’t deserve her then, not in the slightest. And hell, he wasn’t sure if he deserved Y/N now. She was the best goddamn thing that had ever happened to him. He loved her more than anything or anyone else in the entire world. But he always had that hanging paranoia of whether or not he was good for her, that loud cloud of thunder that rained over him, making him so anxious and drowning in the overthinking it caused, making him wonder if he truly did deserve her.

“If really shocked me, shocked me to my core, Steve. but I like you, I really like you. You’re a good guy now. But I also just really really like Y/N, and every time I look at you, all I can see is her. The memory of her looking at you like that and remembering how much I craved for her to look at me like that.”

Steve found himself stunned. Speechless. Shocked. Surprised. Whatever word you want to use. He was just at a complete loss for words as she spoke, not bothering to look up at the drunk girl. And so he just opened his mouth, letting whatever came out come out. He didn’t care. It’s not like she would remember much of this in the morning anyway, given how much she had drank. How many shots she’d downed, how many cups and bottles. Nights are made for saying things that you can’t say in the day, right? Fuck it.

“King Steve, high school Steve. He didn’t deserve Y/N, not in the slightest, not even a little. I didn’t realize that then. I didn’t realize how serious it was until school ended, the popularity began to fade And King Steve died and she was still by my side. She loves me for me. And a whole year of our lives, our relationship, I treated her like shit, pretty much.”

“Yeah.” Robin agreed. It was blunt, but quite frankly, she didn’t have much of a social filter at the moment. Couldn't bring herself to have one.

“I’m a bad boyfriend. Even when I was with Nancy Wheeler, I was a bad boyfriend. And you know what? I’m glad she broke up with me. Byers is better for her, and I know that, I do... And now, I try to be good to Y/N, learn from the mistakes, but fuck... I just don’t know how. I always manage to fuck it up. Always. It’s a talent, really. But she doesn’t care, she never has. She’s so good to me, Robin. She’s the best girl I’ve ever met. She shows me so much love and cares for me so much, and what do I do for her in return? Nothing, it feels like.”

“You’re a bad boyfriend, yeah. King Steve-era-you didn’t deserve her at all. I think it’s a miracle that she stayed with you through all that. But now? Harrington, you’ve changed. I don’t know what happened from Point A to Point A, but you’re a different person now. I mean, for God’s sake, I’d call you a friend now. You could’ve offered me a hundred dollars back then and I never would’ve called you that, I would’ve laughed.”

The two of them fell silent after that, simply letting the silence overcome them. Robin’s eyes grew heavy, slowly closing on her as she began to doze off. Meanwhile, Steve was invested in his thoughts. His mind raced as he fidgeted with his hands, anxious. Filled with questions from his conversation with the girl opposite him. Did he even really deserve you? Or was Robin right, that he’d changed into a completely different person than he'd been this time last year?

A few moments later, he finally spoke up again.

“I wonder what Y/N would say if she was listening to this right now.” He laughed lightly “She’d giggle all sweet, she’d pull me close. Probably laugh and joke with you and point out all her flaws to make us feel better.”

She shrugged, coming to. “Maybe.”

“I’m really sorry that I ignored you in Click’s class. And I’m sorry that I was messy and passed notes around and that I made out in the stairwell when we thought no one was looking.”

“It’s okay, Steve. I promise. It’s not like we could’ve been friends anyway. Band geek and the King? Unlikely.”

After a moment, he noticed the girl’s drooping eyelids, her shallow breaths.

“C’mon, you look tired. Had a long night.” He stood from his spot on the floor, holding out his hand to the smaller girl beneath him. She took it and stood with him, following him as he led her to the living room. Steve gestured to the couch, and she laid down on her side, letting her eyes wander over the room. He gave her a blanket, spreading it over her body. She’d be knocked out soon, he was sure.

“If you need anything, I’m upstairs and right down the hall. Second door to the left, alright? Bathroom is just down the hall there.”

She nodded, pulling the cozy blanket further up her chest, letting her eyes begin to flutter closed. But as he began to walk away, she couldn’t help but call his name.

“Steve?” She asked. He turned back towards her. “Thank you, for this. You didn’t have to rescue me.”

“That’s what friends do, isn’t it?” He teased, switching the light off, leaving the dim glow of the table lamp. “Goodnight, Robin.”

“Goodnight, Steve.”

It wasn’t long before he found himself in bed too, silent in the pitch black darkness. But he couldn’t seem to fall asleep. Something was eating at him. He grew restless as his thoughts grew louder and louder until finally, he turned the lamp beside his bed on, grabbing the phone. The brunette boy quickly dialed your number, not expecting you to pick up. It was late, after all. Just past midnight, last time he looked at the clock. It was certainly well past one in the morning by now.

“Hello?” Your sleepy voice said. He smiled upon hearing you speak.

“Hey, baby. It’s me.” He said lightly.

“Steve?” You were happy to hear his voice. He sounded tired, stressed. But that melted away with every second he was on the phone with you, relief washing over him. “Is something wrong? It’s late, you should be asleep.”

“No, no... I just needed to hear your voice. I was gonna go crazy, I think.”

“What’s up?” You asked, leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen. You’d fallen asleep on the couch a few hours ago while watching some old rerun on TV and when the phone rang, it woke you, and in your hazy state, you answered. And God, you were glad you did. “Talk to me, baby. I’m here.”

“Nothing, nothing. It’s just... I don’t know.” He lied. Wasn’t a very good cover, and he was sure you knew it was a lie. You could nearly always tell when he lied. His voice would get shaky and soft and he would play with his hands more than usual. “I’ve been thinking. And I just wanted to tell you how much I love you, Y/N.”

You smiled. “I love you too.”

“I love you so much, and I know I’m not really a good boyfriend sometimes. And I’m going to work on that. I promise.” The boy said lightly, leaning back against his headboard. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, you know. But I don’t know why you keep me around anymore.”

His last sentence was punctuated with a soft chuckle, making you blush. His laugh always made you blush, causing you to laugh as well. “Well, it’s been almost a year, right? Little late to toss you out now. Guess I’m stuck with you.”

“No refunds, baby.”

“It’s a good thing I don’t want a refund then, huh?”

#steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington one shot #steve harrington fanfiction #joe keery #joe keery imagine #joe keery one shot #joe keery fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things imagine #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things one shot #st1 #st2 #st3

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crosbys-guccifloral-crocs · 6 years

Note

Helloooo, please can you write an imagine where Y/N and Harry were best friends at first then were a couple for almost 1 year and a half but break up and she’s now in relationship with a guy and he told her at a family dinner that he still loves her but she told him smt like “You were my real first love and love story, and I love you but I love him more. He’s the man of my life. But we can still be friends.” Something like this❤️

Warnings: not proofed. Angsty as hell, teen!harry, X factor!harry, best friend!harry.

***

Y/N and Harry shared everything: a street, toys, friends and even a birthday (Feb, 1, 1994) just as their mothers had. Given that they were also childhood best friends. Y/N and Harry had been friends for years — but then, the X Factor happened… Y/N hated those 3 words. They were the words that had changed the entire dynamic of their relationship; as both friends and as a couple. Well… as much of a “couple” as love sick 16 year olds could be. They’d dated for just over a year before he auditioned for the X Factor. They had been each other’s first everything: first kiss, first real person, first time and of course, first heartbreak. First he broke hers. It happened when news broke that he had made it past the first round of auditions.

“I made it, Y/N.” he’d said. It was totally casual and caught her by surprise. They were lying in his family’s living room in Holmes Chapel watching The Notebook with Gemma, Anne and Robin.

She shot up straight from her position on his lap.

“W-what?” She gasped.

“I made the X Factor.” He said, sitting up to pause the film.

“O-oh. That’s great! I knew you could do it, H!” She stammered hugging him close.

“We’re moving to London.” He mumbled.

“Wait… what?” She questioned.

“We’re moving to London, Y/N. as long as I’m in the competition I need to be on set, and because I’m not 18 mum and Robin need to be with me on set.” He murmured.

“Oh… well London’s only 3 hours away. I could come visit on weekends.” She quipped.

“I don’t know, love. That’s a pretty big commitment. We can’t even drive yet, and that’s a lot to expect from your parents.”

“You could just tell me you don’t want this anymore Harry. I don’t need your pathetic excuses.” She cried rushing out of the living room.

“Y/N, honey! Come back please!” Anne called out.

“BABY PLEASE!” Harry cried running barefoot down his cobblestone drive. But it was no use, she was gone.

Over the next few weeks before he left for London, H made every attempt to contact Y/N. He waited for her at her locker at school, outside of her classes, showed up at her doorstep every morning before school with his famous iced tea that she loved so much and everyday she would walk right past him as if he were some stranger passing her on the street. She’d even resorted to blocking his number on her mobile and not allowing her mother to answer their home phone when his number showed up on the caller ID.

Eventually he learned his lesson and stopped attempting to contact her. But not before he could leave a note in her locker before he left for London.

“Y/N,

I’m so sorry baby. I didn’t mean what I said the way it sounded. Please let me explain.

I love you,

H.”

——

It had been nearly 3 months since Harry had made any more attempts to contact Y/N, and she had made no attempts at all to reciprocate those attempts. But nonetheless, it still broke her heart to even think about Harry in the arms of another girl — let alone an older woman… not to mention a woman 14 years his senior! It was sickening. She tried her hardest not to pay attention to the rumours and wanted nothing more than believe they were false, but when every media outlet in the UK was reporting about the supposed relationship between “16 year old X Factor contestant Harry Styles and the host Caroline Flack, aged 30” the rumours became rather hard to ignore. But she had to see for herself, so one weekend, close to the show finale, she decided to take Anne up on one of her multiple offers to make the trip to London because “Harry was dying to see her.” She, Anne and Gemma decided to surprise Harry and meet him at Nando’s one evening to surprise him with her visit, only to see him show up hand in hand at the restaurant with her.

That’s when Y/N truly decided to let Harry go. She no longer tuned into the competition, deleted him on all social media and no longer hung-out with the friend group they shared at school. Instead she became a secluded introvert, only going from school to work.

—— 8 years later (January, 28, 2018) ——

It’s been 8 years since Harry and Y/N had physically laid eyes on one another. Not even at Robin’s wake or service. She went of course she did. He was almost as much of, if not more of a father to her than her own dad, she just sat in the back and only made her presence known to Anne and Gemma when Harry was no longer in the room. She decided to unblock his number for a short while and send him her condolences on Robin’s passing, but then she was back to ignoring him. That doesn’t mean that she’s a stranger to her ex boyfriend’s crazy success and scandalous relationships. She’s run into Anne now and again when she was out and about in Holmes Chapel visiting her mother. She also still had the occasional girl’s day in London with Gemma whenever their schedules meshed properly.

She’d moved there 6 years ago when she was 18 after being accepted to Oxford for (your choice in major). She decided to stay in town after she graduated, she received a job offer with a salary that was impossible to pass up just weeks after graduation.

Soon after she started her new job was when she met Kyle. The way they met was kind of serendipitous, if you will. She’d literally spilt her iced tea on him after they collided turning a corner on the street. They’d been inseparable ever since. He’s been her everything for the past 6 years. Which is amazing, considering she never thought she’d feel this way about another man ever again. Not after he broke her heart all those years ago. Anne and Gemma were happy for her, but would be happier if it were Harry she were still with. They liked Kyle enough though, he treated her well and that’s all they ever wanted for her.

Now, four days before their shared 24th birthday she’s sitting on the sofa in the flat she shared with Kyle trying to get Gemma off the phone.

“Gem, how many times do I need to tell you I. Don’t. Want. A. Party. 24 is no special occasion. I’m not 16, or 18 or 21. ‘M just another year older. Can’t we just go to Greece for a weekend? Just the 2 of us and the mums?” (Anne and Y/M/N). Y/N begs.

“Ugh. Fine. I guess, if that’s what you want. But are you sure you don’t want anything on your actual birthday? Y’know like dinner or summat?” Gemma questions.

“Um, no. I think Kyle’s taking me to Gordon Ramsey’s new restaurant in Chelsea that night. Think he wants it to be a surprise though. I over heard him making the reservation a few weeks back.”

“Oh yeah, I know the place. Fancy little bloke inn’he?” She giggles finding her own sense of humour rather amusing.

“Ha ha, Gem. Laugh it up. S’more than you can say H—-“ Y/N stops herself just before her friend’s brother’s name leaves her lips. “Never mind. Sorry. I didn’t mean that.” She retracts.

“No, Y/N, S’okay. I get it. Know he’s m’brother and what he did was a while back but it still makes him a wanker.” Gem agrees.

“Okay. I’ll call you in a few days to sort out the details of the trip, Gem. Talk soon.” Y/N smiles.

“Laters, baby.” Gemma laughs.

—4 days later, Birthday evening (Feb, 1, 2018) Gordon Ramsey’s restaurant.—

“Wow, Ky. This place is amazing, you shouldn’t have.” Y/N gasps as the hostess brings them to their table and informs them their server will be by shortly to take their orders.

“Course I should, love. S’not every day the girl you love turns 24.” Kyle smirks.

Just as the sommelier (wine expert) approaches their table.

“Excuse me, are you Miss. Y/L/N?” He questions.

“Um yes? What is this about?” She asks sheepishly, confused. Kyle himself seeming just as clueless.

“This is for you. Compliments of the gentleman over there at table 4. Enjoy your meal. This pairs lovely with the prime rib, if I do say so myself.” The wine master smiles as he departs from the table.

Y/N looks over Kyle’s shoulder to see the one and only Harry Styles smirking at her from across the dining room. “Happy Birthday, love” he mouths, lifting his own glass of wine in a “cheers” salute.

“If you’ll excuse me, Kyle I need to take care of something really quickly.” Y/N says, giving her date a tight lipped smile before marching over to Harry and hauling him up from the table by the cuff of his Gucci suit jacket.

“Oi, love. That’s no way to greet an old friend on his birthday is it?” Harry jabs as she continues to maneuver them out the main doors of the restaurant.

“First of all a $300 bottle of wine? Are you freaking kidding me, Harry? Second of all… s’tha’ all I am to you, an’ “old friend?” And third, how the bloody freaking ‘ell did you find me? Especially tonight of all nights?” She whisper yells as they gat far enough into the parking lot.

“One, happy birthday. I know you love that wine. He probably would’ve ordered you some cheap $50 merlot. Two, no love, yer much more to me than just and old friend. S’what I came ere to tell yeh. And three, I’m Harry freaken Styles, love. There’s nothin I can’t do. Not to mention Gordon owed me a favour after I performed at his daughter’s graduation last year. When Gem told me yer new bloke was bringing yeh ere tonight I decided to call in that favour.” Harry smiles, taking in the appearance of the girl he’s loved for the last 20 some-odd years of his life. The same one he hasn’t seen in nearly 8 years. But seeing her here, tonight looking gorgeous as ever in that tight black dress and killer Louboutins, with him?? Well that was a hell of a kick in the nads.

“Why did you really come here, Harry? Because I know it wasn’t just to give me expensive wine and say happy birthday. But if it was, happy birthday, Harry. Goodbye.” Y/N mutters, shaking her head and walking away.

“N-no, baby please! Don’t walk away. Not again.” He begs grabbing at Y/N’s wrist and pulling her into him. “Please, baby. I love you. Don’t walk away again. If you do, I don’t think I can take it.” He says, full on sobbing now and literally begging on his knees outside the busiest restaurant in the Chelsea district, not caring who sees him.

“Get up, Harry. You’re making a scene. Im not your baby anymore. I haven’t been for the last 8 years. And that was your choice. I loved you, but I love Kyle, now. I’d still like to be friends though, yeah?” Y/N says in an attempt to plaster a fake sad smile on her face and look away from Harry to wipe her own tears.

“Not Harry to you baby. ‘M anything but. What happened to H or babe or love or handsome?? Anything but Harry. That makes it too real. You know we can never be friends. We’ve been through too much.” He sobs, standing up to hug her again.

“M’sorry, H. I love Kyle and he’s inside waiting. I’m sure I’ll see you around yeah?” She says, releasing herself from his embrace and kissing his cheek before reentering the restaurant and leaving Harry out in the cold.

——

Fin?? But could definitely see this being a small series if you all like it! There are plenty of places I could go with this! xx M.

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles blurb #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfiction #best friend!harry #angst #answered #anonymous #request

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dangermousie · 6 years

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Reading list for the month - hooray for the Middle Ages!!

I’ve not really been watching much lately (except that I just discovered the Legend of Fuyao and it’s AHMAZING) but I have been reading a bunch, hence the reading list. I also have a v short attention span so while I am not reading all the books listed below that I recently got and/or put on my kindle, I am reading about five of them at once.

As you can tell, I am on the Middle Ages kick right now. Also, as you can tell, current historical crushes are apparently William the Conqueror and Edward the Black Prince and Richard III (always.) Hmmmm.

Valerie Anand, King of the Wood - how many novels are there about the time of William Rufus aka Fabulously Gay aka Killed By Arrow Mysteriously Probably By Orders of Baby Bro? This one revolves around William and Ralph de somebody, a minor nobleman who comes over to get lands and power. Ralph is young and hot and William fancies him and even though Ralph is not inclined that way, he is not going to turn down a roll or dozen in the hay with the king if it gets him closer to his goal. Apparently this all leads to mixed results, eventual death of William, ancient pagan rites, Ralph getting some land and a hot wife, and overall a very sympathetic portrayal of William Rufus. I have not started yet though.

Anna Belfrage, The Cold Light of Dawn - the fourth and possibly last in one of my favorite medieval series that follows the lives of a minor knight, Adam, and his arranged but then more, wife, Kit during the reigns of Edward II and III. This is such a lovely lovely series and this book so far is as good as the rest. Adam is a protege of Roger Mortimer (of the “de facto ruler of England, lover of Queen Isabella’ fame) and when the book 1 starts is slated to arrange marry a spoiled aristocrat who is missing so her family hastily substitutes a bastard daughter and lieeeees. The books follow them as they fall in love, reveal their secrets, try to survive in a pretty horrible time period etc etc. Adam eventually becomes close to Edward III which causes all sorts of internal conflicts. Book 1 is probably my fave (though second half of it is a giant trigger warning as Despenser takes Adam and, to lesser degree, Kit, under his notice) but all of them are good and the latest is wonderful as always. Frankly, by now, I love the lead couple so much, I could just read about them going about their business in their residence for 500 pages.

Anna Chant, Three Times the Lady - I can’t believe I found a novel about Judith, first Countess of Flanders! If you do not know who she is, Judith was a daughter of a Frank king who married her to a much older king of Wessex. When the old man died, she married his grown son (this was a few centuries before the Church would have fits about this) and when that man died, she returned back home. Daddy King did not want to lose such a valuable bargaining chip (who was still quite young) either to make her own marriage or to be taken by some lord via kidnap so he stuck her in a remote fortress while he decided which potential husband would make the best bargain. Ummm. Hunky Baldwin was guarding the place, he and Judith fell for each other and with the help of her brother ran off and got married. Daddy King lost his mind, took Baldwin’s lands, the lovers had to go to the Pope to beg for help blah blah eventually Daddy King cooled down, Baldwin became the first Court of Flanders and got nicknamed Iron Arm for how hard he fought to protect his father in law. So basically, this is a RL medieval romance, of the “hot dude in chainmail holding pretty lady on cover” variety. Seriously - I am very surprised this is the only novel of her I know. I realize records were not as good as they were later but this just gives more room for license. I am quite excited to read this since I’ve read a couple of other books by Chant set around that time and loved them.

Joanna Courtney, The Conqueror’s Queen - Matilda, Mrs the Conqueror. Hmmmmmm. I am about 1/3 in. The book’s odd insistence on Matilda liking but not loving William despite his being amazing in beddddd and generally a stud muffin of stud muffiness is a little odd (it’s just an odd combo) but it’s a fun light read. What I would really love is for someone like Sharon Kay Penman to write a giant doorstopper of a series about that reign.

Joanna Courtney, The Constant Queen - about Elizabeth, the Russian wife of Harald Hardrada. I am about 60% in. It’s not as good as it could be (it doesn’t make Harald interesting which, even reading a short summary of his life on wikipedia - the man had an insane life) but it’s about a subject that’s not novelized often or even that well-know (in fact, prior to this book, the one thing I knew about Harald was that he was defeated by Harold Godwinson who then had to take his exhausted troops and march to fight William the Conqueror. If not for that, England now might be ruled by Harold’s and not William’s descendants.) Also, Elizabeth herself is likeable and the author does a good job on selling me that the two loved each other even while not falling into the trap of making the relationships modern (Harald has a hand-fast wife because he needs sons; it’s not much of an issue etc.) It’s a pleasant beach/travel read.

Dorothy Dunnett, King Hereafter - my favorite stand-alone period novel of all time and I am gonna reread it and bawl. It’s about Earl Thorfinn of Orkney, who Dunnett supposes to be the basis for historical Macbeth. It is simply the best historical novel ever written and if Thorfinn/Groa don’t move you, you have no heart. It’s also a rare book where people feel like people of the period, not modern people playing dress up.

Parke Godwin, Sherwood/Robin and the King - I used to love this bleak, emotional, amazing duology which moves the story of Robin Hood around the time of the Norman Conquest. I just got my hands on it again.

Karen Harper, The First Princess of Wales - ok, this is pretty much a romance novel. About Edward the Black Prince and Joan of Kent. So bring it on!

Justin Hill, Viking Fire - a novel about Harald Hardrada whose life I am fascinated by now

Thomas W. Jensen, As a Black Prince on Bloody Fields - I am currently about a third into this and loving it. It deals with basically the first half of the life of Edward the Black Prince, who is one of my favorite historical what-ifs. Oldest son and heir of Edward III, the Black Prince was a hell of a medieval warrior, very involved in Crecy and in charge in Poitiers, two of the three biggest English victories in the 100 years war. In the latter, heavily outnumbered English captured the French king himself. Also, interestingly, he married for love in quite a scandal. Instead of marrying a foreign royal, he married an English noblewoman, older than him (she was 32 when they married!!!), a widow with five children AND a scandalous history (her first two husbands had a fight that went all the way to the Pope about which one of them was her actual husband. There were secret marriages and all that.) He married in secret, his father eventually came around etc. He would have probably made a King in the scary but effective mold of Edward I, but on one of his campaigns, he contracted one of many nasty medieval diseases - dystentery - which crippled and eventually killed him shortly before his father died, leaving his small son to become Richard II. If the Black Prince was better about drinking clean water, Edward III would have been succeeded not by a small child who, as an adult, wasn’t particularly cut out for the rough business of medieval Kingship, but by a competent and scary adult warrior. Thus no Henry IV revolt (do you really want to face the man who almost conquered France), no war of the Roses, no Tudors, no Church of England. Anyway, he was a fascinating man, in some ways an epitome of medieval warrior class ideals but probably because of that, there aren’t too many novels about him in the last whatever years. Like Henry V, his virtues are a bit too alien for the modern world. He is VERY medieval. But I find him fascinating beyond measure and deserving of more books about him, so this excellent excellent novel is such a pleasure.

Susan Fraser King, Queen Hereafter - about Margaret, wife of Malcolm (of the son of Duncan, killer of Macbeth fame.) I know little about it except the topic interests me.

G. Lawrence, The Heart of the Conqueror - Matilda, again. Matilda here is portrayed as rather an anti-heroine, vain, ambitious and picking William because he’s the scariest and most capable man she met. They are monsters in love (though, frankly, their attitudes are not such much monstrous as early medieval) and I do love them so. I find it quite odd that the author chose to start her novel with the apocryphal story of Matilda insulting William’s courtship and calling him a bastard and William riding in to beat her up in her own father’s town and her deciding this is what she digs in a dude. Lawrence makes the beatdown, already possibly fictional, quite brutal, so it makes me wonder if Matilda is insane to decide William is it because of it. Also, he never lays a finger on her again so wtf. Oh well, historically they did seem to have a rare successful marriage so there is that - I don’t mind him being a good husband since it’s historically accurate, it’s just the weird start to the relationship that makes me boggle.

Rosanne E. Lortz, I Serve: A Novel of the Black Prince - you can tell I am on the Black Prince kick, right? This is about a squire to him and looks quite interesting but I haven’t read it yet.

Isolde Martyn, The Knight and the Rose - sometimes you are just in the mood for an angsty but happy medieval romance.

Anne O’Brien, The Virgin Widow - Romancey take on Anne and Richard III? Yes PLS. If I like this, I might end up getting more of the author’s books as she appears to specialize in known but not super famous medieval women with strong romantic relationships, so YES. I did find it tragically amusing that in order to make the end happy (I peeked), she ends before all the bad stuff happens - their son dying, Anne dying, Richard being killed etc. But then I bawled with the Sunne in Spendour so....

Edith Pargeter, The Brothers of Gwynnedd - reread. It’s a great, epic, tragic, poetic tale of the end of the Welsh independence and surprisingly, in light of all the tragedy, somewhat of a comfort read.

Judith Merkle Riley, A Vision of Light - about a widow of a medieval merchant, this has been recommended to me by multiple people. We shall see.

Anya Seton, Katherine - I read that book so long ago, I barely remember anything. But it’s a classic and Katherine Swynford has always been interesting and I am a sucker for RL romance so reread!!!

Freda Warrington, The Court of the Midnight King - a fantasy AU of Richard III where he gets to live and be happy with his mistress Kate (modeled on mother of his illegitimate child in RL) Oh YES.

#books #middle ages

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swanandapirate · 7 years

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face it alone (in the heart of the winter) (1/2)

Happy holidays to the lovely @ahsagitarius ! I loved getting to know you and discovering all of the things we have in common, but I’m also very happy I can finally leave the shadows of anonymity. To celebrate this joyous event, I wrote you a fic! It’s a combination of the things you love the most (part one is a teeny bit angsty, sorry about that) and I hope you’ll like the fic itself too. ♥

summary: They’d always told her she had inherited her mother’s intelligence and her father’s wit, but when Isa Elizabeth Jones somehow accidentally ended up in the past, she felt anything but smart and far from making a clever remark about it. She needed to get back to the future as soon as possible. Oh, and preferably without her parents in the past finding out who she really was.

~3,700 words / rating: T for some swearing

ao3 // ff.net (link now added)

Title taken from the oh so beautiful Glacier by James Vincent McMorrow

(Note: The storyline of S7 is not mentioned in this fic, there is one small reference, but besides that this fic does not contain anything to confirm or deny the events of s7. It can be seen as both canon-compliant and canon divergent. To keep it simple for this story: CS’s kid was born about two years after Zelena had baby Robin.)

On December 20th of the year—well she wasn’t really sure of the year—Isa Elizabeth Jones knew she had thoroughly fucked up. She knew her parents would be livid when they found out she had thoroughly fucked up, and even more so when they discovered she was also swearing like the sailor her father was.

It was safe to say this was all a big mistake. It wasn’t her plan to end up in the past; it wasn’t even the plan to end up anywhere at all. She simply wanted to spend her time doing things that were less boring than an uptight town Christmas dinner her grandmother had organized and where everyone was making awkward small talk. So, when her cousin Robin—who wasn’t really her cousin but Isa had lost track of who was related to whom years ago, so Robin was just that— had texted her, asking if she wanted to get out of Storybrooke Hall, Isa’s reply was an all-caps yes.

After having told her dad she had forgotten something at home and after innocently smiling while he had eyed her and nodded his consent, Isa had disappeared to the location Robin had told her to meet. She recognized the place, a rooftop with a view of the clock tower, from her parents’ wedding pictures. It had brought a soft smile to her face as she could imagine them standing before her, her mom in white, Dad in all black saying I do and starting a new journey, beginning their adventure of being husband and wife to eventually become a mother and father to her.

Robin had shouted to catch her attention again and had smirked as she proposed to practice their magic. Isa should’ve said no, should’ve said that they were only allowed to with their moms or aunts present but she hadn’t and her purple flash had clashed with Robin’s green shimmer and then something else she couldn’t quite discern was added, rendering the flux of magic dangerous, almost dominant and threatening in how it had swirled around them. The hairs on her arms stood erect and in a flash, a split second of distraction, she was gone.

And had ended up here.

The past.

Fuck.

One might wonder how exactly Isa knew it was the past. Storybrooke was, even in the future, a dormant town, change taking place so slowly that it hardly felt anything was indeed different. Well, the first thing that struck her as odd was that before the appearance of the ominous magic, it was evening and now it was not, the sky grey but light and the streets bustling with movement. The second thing was the people; how much they might’ve desired it, they weren’t immune to the effects of time.

The first person she had run into after she’d left the now empty rooftop and ventured onto the Storybrooke streets was Aurora, the owner of the clothing shop she frequented, and who simply walked past her as if she didn’t exist. Isa was about to turn around, to indignantly shout when she noticed her hair was not in its usual bun, flowing freely in the wind, and that she wasn’t wearing her pair of trendy designer glasses that were normally glued to her nose.

When only two minutes later the exact same thing happened but with Sneezy this time, Isa had figured it all out.

But what she was supposed to next was still a big mystery.

A shiver ran up her arms, the dark green dress a perfect match to her eyes but not to the December cold.

Isa gravitated, furiously rubbing her hands over the bare skin to create some kind of heat inducing friction, towards the warmest spot she knew, both actual heat and the kindness and spirit of the place frequenting it: Granny’s.

The bell chimed as she hesitantly opened the door. She’d done it a million times before but now she could not predict what would lie beyond it, what faces would greet her and how they would look at her.

In contrary to what she expected, Granny’s’ patrons seemed undisturbed by her entrance, still vividly conversing and enjoying their food, not even granting her a glance. Eyes cast downwards, Isa searched an empty spot, a corner where no one could question who she was or why she was wearing almost no clothes in the heart of winter.

It didn’t stop someone from approaching, the footsteps growing in sound as she shrunk more into her seat.

“Are you okay?” the person said, the voice so familiar that Isa couldn’t help herself from looking up.

The pixie cut was still pitch black, not a trace of silver streaks. They had the same eyes, the same green, hazel irises all of the women of their family had. Those were the eyes staring at her but they lacked the soft crinkles around the edges Isa had grown used to.

Her grandmother was supposed to be young but not this young.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thank you,” was her answer to wave away any concerns and any mandatory conversations. It was better not to risk anything.

“You look a bit cold, that’s all,” Snow attempted again and Isa knew she would persist. It was Snow White she was talking about, that is.

“A little bit,” she admitted, her eyes slowly daring to meet her grandmother’s again. “I forgot my coat at home and I can’t go and get it.”

“Well, sweetie, if you want I can give you one of mine? Ever since my son was born, I keep a spare one in the car, it doesn’t take a lot of being spit upon to learn.”

Did that mean that Neal was still a baby? That would be inexplicably weird. Neal was her fun uncle that was allowed to do more stuff than her fifteen-year-old-self was and who took her on adventures and now he was just a baby—a puking one to be exact.

“Oh, don’t worry,” Snow continued to talk, misinterpreting Isa’s musing silence as hesitance. “The pullover is clean, Neal has outgrown the stage of randomly puking, thank god.”

The bright eyes continued to stare at her, patiently waiting for an affirmative nod to appear so Snow could be set into motion to go retrieve the pullover. It was giving her nerves, because Isa knew what she wanted to reply and she knew what her grandmother wanted her to reply, but she also shouldn’t reply that exact thing because it would lead to involvement and more questions and she hadn’t even figured out in what year she was or why she ended up here.

Ugh. Being stuck in the past was all very inconvenient.

Pinching her hands together, Isa worriedly nibbled on her lower lip, her tongue immediately soothing the small dents in the flesh. She needed to give an answer now.

“That would be great.”

Snow immediately smiled and put her hand on Isa’s bare shoulder. She gently squeezed, another warm gesture towards someone who, even if they shared the same genes, was a complete stranger to her.

“I’ll be right back,” Snow reassured before walking away, turning towards Granny and telling her something Isa couldn’t understand, but Granny did as she resolutely nodded. The bell announced that her grandmother had left and it took only one worrying minute before a steaming cup of hot chocolate was set in front of her by Granny herself, the elderly lady smiling as she watched Isa’s eyes widen at the sight of the cup.

“Enjoy it, girl,” she said, peering down through the half-moon glasses perched on the tip of her nose. “On the house. I like people who can appreciate a cup of hot chocolate.”

Isa could, believe her. She was her mother’s daughter, after all.

She dared to take a first hesitant sip from the mug but the beverage was still too hot, sending pain through the tip of her tongue and as she gave her tongue the time to recover, Snow walked back in, a grey pullover in her hands.

“Here you go,” she presented the piece of clothing with pride. Isa accepted it, not having any choice but to, and let the fabric slide along her arms as she put it on. She brushed her dark locks away in order for them to land on the collar of the sweater.

Snow went to sit across from her, a determined air about her and Isa knew it meant trouble. Time for her poker face. She was lucky her grandmother didn’t have the same superpower as her mother did or she’d be royally screwed.

“I haven’t seen you around town before,” Snow stated, her eyes narrowing and her head tilting as if she was assessing Isa’s whole being in addition to her presence at Granny’s.

“I’m just visiting,” she replied. She lifted her shoulders in a shrug that hopefully conveyed some sort of innocence.

“Alone?”

This was the question she was dreading. She couldn’t exactly tell her that she was indeed alone but that her family was both here and in the future, but they simply didn’t know yet now.

“Umm, so… If we’re being technical, then yes, I came here alone,” Isa admitted. “If we’re not, then… I still came here alone. But I’m in search of some people and finding them would not make me alone anymore, so that would solve my problem.”

After that very terrible answer, Isa decided to take a sip of her cooled down hot chocolate, hiding behind the mug and mountain of whipped cream. She had no way of anticipating what her grandmother would reply, so it was an anxious wait for some kind of reaction—a laugh, a scoff, anything would be better than this stretching silence.

“Well, if that’s the case, it’s your lucky day. My family is experts in finding people. If you want, we can go to the sheriff’s station and start your search there.”

The sheriff’s station would be a bad place to start her research because one: her problem was created with magic so there should be a magical solution as well and she wouldn’t find that at the station, the vault at the graveyard was a more valuable starting point. And two: there were two people who she would most likely run into and Isa would love to avoid that particular encounter.

-/-

As Snow showed her all of the Storybrooke sights, pointing at certain buildings and providing Isa with backstories, she could do nothing but nod. She knew all of the stories, what every building’s use was. She’d grown up here, ran along the streets while racing her Dad, fell on the concrete as her mom was teaching her to ride a bike. This was her town and yet it wasn’t.

“Here we are.”

They stopped in front of the familiar building and Isa hugged herself in both an attempt to get warmer and to prepare herself for what would take place.

“My husband and daughter are the sheriffs here so I’m certain they’ll be able to help,” Snow granted some reassurance, seeing the nerves in Isa’s posture.

Opening the door, Snow extended her hand, letting Isa lead the way. Politely, she smiled in gratitude, doing her best to not let the smile transform into a grimace.

“Emma? David? Are you here?” Snow yelled as they walked towards the office. Isa closed her eyes and wished that no answer would sound through the hallway, that it would stay quiet and they would have to return without any progress.

“I’m here, Mom,” was the reply.

Isa flinched but still continued to approach the source of the voice, her grandmother following closely.

And there she was. Mom.

She closed a file, her golden hair swishing as she turned on the chair to face them.

“Hey,” Emma said and smiled, an aura of light surrounding her. Her eyes curiously darted towards Isa, who was avoiding them with might and main.

“Hi, Emma.” Snow smiled back and looked back to Isa. “This is my daughter Emma. Emma, this is …” she halted as she realized she had no idea what Isa was called.

Isa couldn’t tell them her real name. There were too many risks tied to that. But in the stress of the situation, the adjusting her brain had to do, it couldn’t come up with a name. Every name she’d ever heard vanished from her mind and the only thing she could remember was hers: Isa Elizabeth Jones.

She needed to say something, this silence was becoming way too long and suspicious, Snow’s hand still hanging in the air as she gestured towards Isa.

“E- Elizabeth,” she stammered, hoping that it didn’t come out as uncertain as she felt.

“Elizabeth,” Snow finally finished her sentence. “Elizabeth is in search of some people but she hasn’t found them yet and I thought you might be able to help.”

“Is that so?” Emma questioned, a strange tone to her voice that surprised Isa, making her accidentally meet her mother’s eyes.

She stared and stared, she couldn’t seem to be able to pull her gaze away. It wasn’t that her mom had changed a lot over this past decade—an estimate on Isa’s part—nothing more than her blonde hair still being long instead of the short hairdo she had in the future and the other small things she’d noticed while looking at her grandmother. It was simply her whole being. It was as if there was a whole other air to her.

“I know what you’re thinking,” her mom said and for a second, Isa wanted her to really know what she was thinking. That her superpower was more than just spotting lies, that her magic extended further than the Savior's power. Emma couldn’t know what she was thinking. “It’s weird that my mom and I look the same age, but that’s a really long story.” An apologetic smile and shrug followed, telling Isa Emma wouldn’t tell the story and she was just supposed to accept that fact of life.

Understandable, you couldn’t tell a stranger about curses and magic and a fairytale land.

“That’s fine.”

She already knew all of it.

“I need to go get Neal,” Snow announced, her watch revealed by pushing the white sleeve of her shirt out of the way. “Emma, could you try and help Elizabeth?”

“Sure, Mom. Could I have a quick moment with you before you go?” Out of the corner of her eye, Emma subtly stared at Isa, but Isa knew her mom. She wanted to discuss her presence without her presence.

“Can I go to the bathroom, please?” Isa was giving them an out, an excuse to talk about her without having to send her away. She’d rather not know what they would discuss.

“Sure, sweetie. It’s right in the hallway.”

She could feel them waiting until she’d left the room before beginning to talk and it brought an unsettling feeling to her stomach.

Isa sat down on the closed toilet seat, running her hands through her hair, combing the brown locks to distract herself from the situation. It was a nervous tic she had; it was like how her dad scratched the back of his head when he felt embarrassed or stressed, she’d inherited that too.

After what she felt was a respectable amount of time spent on the toilet, Isa stood up, unlocking the door with one click and straightening her dress. Her lungs expanded as she inhaled, a feeble attempt to prepare herself for the conversation to follow.

The office was empty when she walked towards it, but after scanning the rest of the room, Isa saw her mother sitting on the couch that stood against the wall, a Pop Tart and a can of soda on the table in front of her. Isa could see through the supposed act of kindness, through the soft smile on Emma’s lips. It was a way to gain her trust, to let her acclimatize to the strange setting. It was a subtle approach to bribe her for information so Emma herself could trust this strange girl sitting in her office. She couldn’t hold it against her mom, however. She was impressed, even. It would’ve worked with any other kid, food was always the way to go, but Isa knew too much, had too much to protect to fall for it.

Shit, she was in charge of the future. That seemed like a very unwise responsibility for a fifteen-year-old to have.

She sat down on the opposite side of the couch, leaving enough space between the both of them, and stared at her hands curling around her knees. In the background, she could see the Pop Tart and soda moving on the table, being pushed closer to her for easier access.

Some food wouldn’t be so bad, to be honest. Her last meal was the appetizers at the Christmas dinner and that was a couple of hours ago. And a couple of years in the future even though that was actually in the past for her. Wow, timelines were confusing. Maybe the traveling back counted as more hours, did time traveling magic have that effect? She’d probably be hungrier if it did because a more than a decade was a long time. Giving up on attempting to understand, she grabbed the Pop Tart and took a bite.

“So…” Emma began speaking, “You wanna tell me who exactly it is you’re looking for?”

Like she expected. Bribe.

But it was working. Isa felt guilty about giving her mother the silence treatment after having received provision. Lying wasn’t an option either because her mother had a freaking superpower that not only ruined all of Isa’s sneaking out but also her valiant attempt of preserving the future.

Man, she just loved her life.

Swallowing the last bit of strawberry, Isa licked her lips and decided to tell the truth but also to be vague enough about it.

“Let’s say that I’m looking for my parents.”

“And that’s the truth?” Emma questioned, her blonde eyebrows rising.

“Yup.” Isa’s lips plopped as she answered.

Something seemed to shift in her mother’s conduct, moving from wary to understanding, her eyes softening and shoulders losing their tension.

“I know how it feels.” she said quietly, “You know, I was an orphan too. Abandoned on the side of the road and I searched so long for my parents. All orphans do it, thinking their parents must’ve had a good reason for abandoning them, that maybe it was all a misunderstanding.”

Isa couldn’t hear more. Her parents hadn’t abandoned her. They were probably madly searching for her after she’d disappeared. She’d left her parents who both had both been abandoned by the people who they loved most and had lost their loved ones. All because she was bored at dinner.

“I’m not an orphan!” she yelled, the emotions overcoming her and causing an outburst that interrupted the story. Her mother had a shocked expression about her and Isa immediately felt guilty. She was only trying to help, trying to soothe a lonely child by baring her own troubled past. “Look, I’m sorry,” Isa apologized, having regained her grip on her temper but the tears gathering in the edges of her eyes nonetheless. “I know who my parents are, I just don’t know how to get back to them.”

And she needed to. As quickly as possible.

“Is there anything I can help with?” Her mother moved closer, gently rubbing Isa’s shoulder in a soothing gesture.

Her hands were fiddling with the hem of the grey cardigan that smelled exactly like her grandmother did.

“I don’t think so.” She shook her head and the motion caused a tear to fall down that she immediately wiped away again. “I truly appreciate what you and Gra- your mother have already done.”

She furiously rubbed her eyes, trying to chase away the tears and to find her strength again. She could do this. She was the daughter of Captain Hook and the Savior, for god’s sake. She was born with perseverance and resilience, she was brought up with love and wisdom. This was her moment to show her parents they deserved to be proud of her. This was her moment to show she was part of her family of heroes.

“Do you have a place to stay?”

“No.” Her head moved from left to right another time. “But I’m sure I’ll manage.”

Perseverance and resilience.

Her mother didn’t agree with that apparently.

“Elizabeth, it’s winter and dark. You’re not going to stay outside,” she said, her words final and not to be contradicted. Exactly how her future self would announce Isa was punished for doing something she wasn’t allowed to. “Look, you seem like a really great kid and I think your parents must miss you a lot so I’m going to do everything in my power to help you find them. Right now, though, my priority is getting you somewhere warm and safe, getting you some warmer clothes and giving you a place to sleep.”

She silently challenged Isa to disagree but how on earth could she be against any of those things? Warmth, sleep, food, those were all positive words in Isa’s dictionary. She nodded, a strand of hair falling in front of her eyes. Her fingers caught it and brushed it behind her ear.

“Would you be alright with coming home with me tonight? There’s room enough in my house. You can pick a room, take a shower, eat something warm.”

She could sleep in a familiar place, in her home, with the people she loved the most near her. Even if she didn’t have her parents, at least she had some version of them. She could rest and then go in search of a solution with a fresh mind. In the end, the joint power of the pros outweighed the one big con (WHAT IF SHE ACCIDENTALLY TOLD THEM WHO SHE WAS)

“That sounds great,” she said honestly.

“Perfect.” Emma stood up and grabbed her coat, extinguishing the lights in the station as she locked everything to prepare for her departure. “I think you’re going to like my husband Killian. You remind me a bit of him.”

Well, fuck.

A/N: Poor, poor Isa. Part two is (hopefully) coming soon and involves lots of family fluff, lots of Isa worrying about the future and lots of swearing (because how would you be in such a situation) Perhaps someone might figure her secret out, oooooh.

#captain swan #cs ff #csss #cssecretsanta #captain swan secret santa #please excuse any mistakes this was already late so no time for proofreading #my words and sentences

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skylarmiller04-blog · 6 years

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James Dean- The Rebel With a Cause

In the past few years, Taylor Swift has become a well-recognized singer who appeals to young girls and teenagers. All six of her albums have had hit songs and one of her most recent albums, 1989, stayed the number one hit album for a record amount of time. That album happened to include Style, a song written about Harry Styles and their time together. The song used catchy lyrics, had a nice beat to it, and the words happened to stick in my head. In it, she compares Harry Styles to James Dean by making the reference, “you’ve got that James Dean daydream look in your eyes” (Swift 2014). Not many people can say that they have a look named after them, but James Dean can. As much as I don’t like to admit it, I didn’t really know who James Dean was until I heard Swift’s song. After listening to Style I was curious on who James Dean was and proceeded to research him. I found out that he was an actor in the fifties prior to his tragic death at the age of twenty-four. I don’t know if I could pinpoint what exactly it is that draws me in towards James Dean, but he certainly interests me and I hope to figure out why. Even though he died at a young age, James Dean is considered “a Cool original,” to many people, like Pountain and Robins, the authors of Cool Rules: Anatomy of an Attitude (70). Not only has he had songs written about him, like James Dean by the Eagles, but people, like James Franco, have styled themselves after him. Having managed to become an iconic actor after starring in only three movies, Dean’s level of influence is unprecedented. Something I have noticed about James Dean is that there is not just one thing that draws my attention towards him. Not only was he attractive, but he was also a rebel both on the screen and in real life. As sad as it is to admit it, I have not met a rebel and am starting to think that I haven’t met any rebels and cool people because the first thing they tend to do is drop out of school and I have been in school all of my life. Something that is essential to cool is dropping out of school, which Gwendolyn Brooks argued for in her poem, We Real Cool, by writing “we real cool. We left school” (1). It’s a known fact that cool people tend to drop out of school; just look at Rihanna, Charles Dickens, and Elton John. They chose to abandon the education system to pursue their passions. And let’s not forget that Marlon Brando was expelled for riding a motorcycle down his school’s hallway. The bottom line is that cool people do not stay in school. Whether they leave voluntarily or not, they are still leaving and that is what matters. So it is no surprise that in 1951, James Dean dropped out of the University of California, Los Angeles to pursue acting. That was a cool move on his behalf, and his acting career skyrocketed afterwards. If I were given the option to drop out, I don’t think I would take it. To me the surest path to success is by attending and graduating college. Sure I could drop out and become the next Steve Jobs or James Dean, but the odds of that happening are low. While this may not be the coolest move on my behalf, I am going to fully commit to school, not just cruise on by. I am going to take a rigorous course load, actually learn what is being taught and not just memorize information for tests, and I am going to be proud of graduating from college. School isn’t for everyone, that’s why people leave it when the opportunity arises, but others stay in school and that’s fine too. Despite what Brooks argued, I don’t necessarily think school is uncool. I think it has more to do with the amount of effort people put to their education. If one don’t want to put in the work, then he should drop out. But if he stays in the system, he should really commit to it and take control of his learning. After all, control plays an integral role in cool and if people have control over their education, then to me that makes it cool. As aforementioned, James Dean starred in three movies prior to his death- Rebel Without a Cause, East of Eden, and Giant. In Rebel Without a Cause, Dean took on the role of a high schooler named Jim Stark who recently moved to a new town and didn’t really start off on the right foot there. In fact, the film began with him passed out in the middle of a street where police officers found him and took him to the station (Ray 1955). If that doesn’t scream rebel, then I don’t know what does. James Dean perfected the role of being a rebel in Rebel Without a Cause. The title of the movie clearly speaks for itself and James Dean set the path for teenage rebels of future generations to come. James Dean was known for being one of the first teenagers in America. In the past, people were either boy or man, girl or woman. But, Dean managed to create this in-between space that didn’t really exist before. Of course people still went through the ages of thirteen to nineteen, but they took on more of an adult role. For instance, when my grandparents were nineteen, they were already married and my grandfather started a construction company. But at nineteen, James Dean was attending UCLA trying to figure out what he would do with his life, kind of like what I am currently doing. Right now, I am at UM trying to figure out what I want to major in, if I want to transfer universities, and what I want to do with my life. These are all major decisions to make in today’s world, but this was uncommon in the past. Teens prior to Dean, and myself, did not have that privilege, they had more responsibilities and had to take care of themselves and sometimes their families. Thus, James Dean created the American teenager. Something worth noting is that Dean didn’t only create the American teenager, he also created the rebel. While some people thought this teenage rebellion was a ploy for attention, and a phase angsty kids go through, others sympathized with Dean and saw him as “a rebel with a cause, and that cause was escape from the suffocating web of family ties, school, suburban respectability and labour discipline that the new ‘mass society’ imposed” (Pountain and Robins 70). In other words, he was rebelling against things I am drawn towards. Just because Dean got to live the life of a teenager doesn’t mean his life was easy. In fact, he was mostly raised by his aunt and uncle after his mother passed away when he was nine. The death of a parent deeply affects and influences a child and I’m sure Dean was no exception, perhaps this is where his fascination with the macabre came from. Also, let’s not forget that while he was living with his aunt and uncle, Dean was molested by Reverend James DeWeerd (“James Dean Biography”). This is another area where Dean and I differ. The most difficult thing I have had to deal with was my parents getting a divorce. Perhaps this was the event that triggered Dean to have sexual encounters with many people, like Marlon Brando, Marilyn Monroe, Steve McQueen, and Pier Angeli, or perhaps that abuse was part of what added to his broody, mysterious, and rebellious aura. Something I find it ironic is that James Dean wasn’t an advocate for teenage rebellion even though he symbolized it. In fact, he advocated for teens to do the opposite and follow the rules. For instance, during an interview with a sheriff Dean was asked how he felt about teenagers speeding. He responded by saying people shouldn’t drive fast because it’s not safe and is dangerous. But he seemed to be a into hypocrisy considering he died speeding in a Porsche. So, while Dean might not have verbally encouraged this kind of teenage rebellion, his actions made him the epitome of it. To me, this is uncool. His actions and words contradicted each other. I hate it when people, like my grandfather, tell me, “do as I say, not as I do.” If I am supposed to act in the way someone is telling me to, but they don’t act that way, then why should I? Perhaps that was why teens didn’t heed Dean’s advice on driving the speed limit. Maybe they figured that if he wouldn’t take his own advice, then why should we? In this instance, I think they were cooler than he was. I’m also fascinated that James Dean’s motto seemed to be “live fast, die young, [and] leave a good looking corpse,” which he did all of the above (“James Dean Quotes”). He was constantly involved in risky activities, like smoking, speeding, and racing, died at a young age, and was quite handsome at that time. It makes me wonder if his mindset made it inevitable that he would die young. If he didn’t die on September 30th, would he have died the next day, month, or year? Once again I don’t have an answer to this, no one does, but when one involve himself in activities like he did, death is a factor that needs to be acknowledged. Something cool that I think James Dean did was that he seemed to acknowledge the fact that life is about balancing living and dying. He, like many cool people, flirted with death. He acknowledged the fact that at some point he will die and there is no in acting like immortality is a thing. My father once told me there are two things you have do in life, pay taxes and die. So when you acknowledge death, you can dance and flirt with it by pushing the boundaries of living that border death. James Dean’s favorite way to flirt with death was by driving fast cars and breaking speed limits. This is portrayed in the Eagles song, James Dean, in which they wrote “along came a Spyder and picked up a rider” (Eagles). James Dean wasn’t nicknamed ‘One Speed Dean’ for no reason. His one speed was fast and that ended up costing him his life. He even received a speeding ticket hours before his death, but that didn’t slow him down. So sometimes flirting with death, means that death wins, but eventually everyone will die. It is an inevitable truth humans cannot escape. No matter how hard one tries, he cannot outrun death, even I am guilty of trying to avoid death. I go to Zumba classes and eat kale and quinoa salads somehow thinking that this will increase my chances of outrunning death, even though I know that’s impossible. This is uncool on my behalf seeing as humans cannot control when they die. But sometimes the unexpected happens and death comes earlier than expected. James Dean was no exception to this. In fact, Pountain and Robins argue that Dean’s “untimely death in a car crash sealed his status as Cool’s first martyr” (70). As aforementioned, James Dean died at the age of twenty-four. This makes me wonder, do we regard him as highly as we do because he died so young? James Dean only starred in three movies before he died. That isn’t a lot to base a movie career on. Think about it, Robert Redford and Clint Eastwood have both starred in over forty-five movies each. That shows that they are both actors have strong acting skills that make them sought after to star in movies, but James Dean doesn’t have that kind of track record, per se. The three movies he starred in, he received praise for, but if he didn’t crash his Porsche on September 30, 1955, would his career have continued to carry on the upward trend it was on or would it have plateaued or even plummeted? While no one knows the answer to this question, it is interesting to think about. Also, James Dean would’ve not only continued to act if he didn’t die, but he also would’ve continued to age. It would be interesting to see what he would’ve looked like as he grew older. I think one of the reasons people, like Pountain and Robins, regard James Dean as “a Cool original,” is because he was and is so attractive (70). Thanks to photography becoming more widespread in the twentieth century, James Dean was captured on film quite frequently, which wasn’t common in the past. These photos show what James Dean represents and why he is considered attractive to many people, including myself. In one of his many pictures, Dean is shown reading a large book, The Complete Poetical Works by James Whitcomb Riley, at a kitchen table while smoking at the same time (Farr). Not only is smoking an act of rebellion, but it is also wildly attractive, especially when caught on camera. The way Dean is holding the cigarette in his hand is almost as if he is dangling it between two fingers (Farr). In fact, he doesn’t really have a grip on it. He manages to hold the cigarette in a nonchalant and subtle way that if one were to glimpse at the picture, he might overlook it. Not only is the cigarette an attractive aspect of the picture, but the glasses he is wearing and the book he is holding are as well. As stereotypical as it may be, when I see someone reading a book, I think they are intellectual and that makes them attractive. And the round eyeglasses Dean is wearing give him a touch of geek chic. Something that is cool about James Dean in this photo is the fact that he isn’t smiling at the camera like most people do. In fact, he isn’t even looking at the camera- he’s reading his book (Farr). That’s a cool move, he’s not being cheesy and smiling like most people, including myself, would do. James Dean’s pose is not the only attractive part of him in the picture. He himself is attractive. He’s both young and handsome, and that essence is captured in this photo, like all James Dean photos considering he did not live past the age of twenty-four. Not only was his face wrinkle free, but his hair was still on his head and he was sporting the messy bed head (Farr). His hair wasn’t neat and gelled back, it was messy and unkempt, standing up in different directions, and yet he still looked attractive, maybe even more so. I think this James Dean is attractive in this picture because he managed to do so in an effortless way. But, I don’t think I would see him as attractive as I do if he lived to grow older seeing as some people do not age well. Another thing worth noting is that Dean lived and acted in the mid-fifties, which was roughly seventy-two years ago. A lot of things have happened in those seventy-two years. People have walked the moon, started carrying phones on them, and constantly use the Internet which was nonexistent in 1955. Society has changed drastically and while people, like myself, may not want to admit it, it affects who they are. If James Dean was born sixty years later than he was, I’m sure he would still be a rebel today, but it would be interesting to see society’s effect on him.

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lovehotelreservation · 8 years

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how would robin, kamui, odin, libra, lon'qu, niles, leo, hinata, and shura deal with/express neediness?

OOOO BOI HERE WE GO!

ALSO JUST GONNA

CASUALLY ADD ALFONSE TO THIS LIST

When hit with feelings of neediness, at first Robin attempts to shrug it off. Approaching you about his sudden desire to do nothing else but be by your side makes him feel embarrassed, feeling as though you would find him clingy and overbearing. At first, he would try to busy himself with developing new strategies–whether legitimately for an upcoming battle, or for leisure. However, each plan he composes falls short, as thoughts of you quickly take over his mind, causing him to “lose” in every battle he’s strategizing for. Unable to deal with these feelings on his own any longer, he would seek you out, his failed strategies in hand. Under the guise of asking for your opinion on his plans, he would, at last, feel relief as you try to compose new tactics together–particularly with him standing behind you, his body hovering over yours with his arms on either side of you as his hands rest on the table.

The idea of neediness may be a foreign concept to Lon’qu, but is certainly one that annoys him to no end. While his love for you is unquestionable, the thought of being reduced to nothing more than a yearning, love-struck puppy makes him feel like a weakling, which he attempts to do away with by taking up his sword to either train or peel potatoes–yes, with his sword. However, his attempts remain as such for he is unable to rid himself of the neediness that overwhelms him. He would wander over to where you are, greeting you quietly–though almost making you jump due to how sudden and gruff the call of your name would be. His eyes boring into yours and his face turning red with embarrassment, he would ask if you have ever felt needy for him and, if so, how did you deal with such a sensation. Regardless of this intense desire to kiss and take you into his arms, you would have to be the one to initiate things, as his ~warrior pride~ would leave him far too flustered and embarrassed to do so.

Could neediness be considered a sin? The question would float around Libra’s mind as he wonders about this intense need for your presence. His hands–so used to being clasped together in prayer–would suddenly feel a faint tingle, a twitch that could only be sated if he were to go and cup your cheeks while he leans over for a kiss. While an innocent wish, the desire to express his affection for you physically would simply be much too strong for him to simply pray away. When he does eventually approach you, he would ask if you mind if he were to be a little indulgent with you. Slightly sheepish yet all in good, gentle humor, he would tease you gently, remarking how you seemed to have bewitched him with your love just before he leans forward to kiss your lips.

With his time spent growing up at Northern Fortress, Kamui would have become used to feelings of neediness, especially when it came to his Nohrian royal siblings and feeling all alone whenever their visits came to an end. While unfortunately, this became a feeling he would be used to, the sensation of neediness would take on a whole new level once you were in his life. As opposed to before, when feelings of neediness for interaction with his loved ones were amended through playing the piano, writing poetry, etc., now this sensation could only be properly addressed by being by your side. Furthermore, given that he would not be in the position to wait for his loved ones to come to him, now he would instead seek you directly. At his sudden arrival, you would ask if he was in need of anything, to which he would smile sheepishly and nod, just before stepping forward, his arms reaching out to embrace you as his mouth finds its way to yours.

Neediness. What a complexing–if not utterly annoying–sensation. Leo would be left massaging his temples, sighing as he wonders how to go about this feeling, one which leaves him unable to win a game of chess–let alone enjoy it–for all he could think about and desire for is nothing else but for your attention, for you to dote on him. Logically speaking, of course, just wallowing around wouldn’t yield anything productive, thus would be why he would go forth and approach you. While not being too direct about his sudden need to see you, he may have on hand a chess box or a book, asking if you would like to spend some time together partaking in either of the two activities and more. To either have a clash of wit–with him reigning superior, obviously~–or to have you nestled against his chest while sitting upon his lap as he reads to you, both are two simple yet effective solutions to his perplexing emotions.

A needy Niles is a pitiful one, or so he would consider himself to be. So used to being the one inflicting pain onto others–in your case, only if you asked nicely, else he would just tease you incessantly as he always would–to suddenly find himself in a state where he could not find any sense of relief or completion unless you were right there with him would only make him smirk bitterly to himself. After all–while something he does not have to worry about–if you were to leave him and he was stuck with these same very feelings, how else would he be relieved of this desire? Thus, without questioning his feelings, he would seek you out–or in his words, hunt you down. Slithering up right behind you–as he always found you so cute when you were startled–his arms curl around and entrap you in a tight embrace, a kiss to your lips his way of greeting you. When the two of you part, he would grin, his tongue trailing over his mouth as he hums about how it was going to take a lot more than just a kiss for his neediness to be eased. After all, as the source of this wretched feeling, you must be punished accordingly~

How do you feel about a lute rendition of “What Is Love?” Oh the throes of intense love! No one could possibly begin to understand the burden of being as divine of a lover than Odin Dark! And yet, in the same vein, there was no one around who could even begin to handle the passionate embers of his love, one which could stand against sun. However, such overwhelming affection came with overwhelming burden, especially when he was in need of your attention and affection. His pride in the way, he attempts to relieve his feelings through hours of angsty poetry, attempts at making full-length epics of a lost soul–who, by the way, is ripped, handsome, could bench press a knight in full armor, and is like, the prince of darkness. And yet, as this is Odin, it honestly would not take long before you are surprised–and even alarmed–to find your lover weakly crawling up towards you, his expression pitiful while his hands make grabbing motions as he pleads and begs for you to shower him in your affection.

The moment Hinata feels any slight pangs of neediness–which, honestly, is practically a near-constant occurrence–he is taking off running for you. After all, why delay the inevitable with feelings of hesitation or embarrassment? No matter the time or day, he would always be in need of you, especially when it comes to laying his head on your lap, his expression jubilant as he receives your affection. Greeting you with a chirp, his arms would latch around you, his face nuzzling your neck as he goes on about how much he just wants to see, kiss, and hold you.

What was he, a foolish boy? Suddenly taken and overwhelmed by this odd yet undeniable sense of neediness, Shura would be shaking his head at and scolding himself. Certainly by now, he should be much too old to still be feeling this way, which in turn makes him smile bitterly as he–a man of his ~ever illustrious caliber–was in love with you, someone who deserved better. A feeling that hangs in the back of his head, you couldn’t possibly see a future with a man like him–an old, battle-hardened thief who has done more bad than good, regardless of his intentions. This in turn leads to him distancing himself away, believing it to be better for your sake, even if his need for you is eating up at him. You would have to be the one to confront him about this, to which he would have to concede upon, now that you were here. With a wry smile, he would gesture to his lap, asking if you “wouldn’t mind indulging this old man here with your company.” With you seated on his lap and tucked securely in his arms, it would always be here in this position, these moments shared with you that all his fears and insecurities would be eased.

Considering his stance on attachment, any feelings of neediness would come off as confusing and perplexing to Alfonse. While there was no need to fear that somehow you would be traveling back to the world from which you came from, there were still plenty of other matters to be concerned about in this new realm you now refer to as home. Though this does certainly cause him to behave more protectively around you, there is still this underlying feeling that fears that you would somehow be taken away from him. While his initial instinct–from the days before–was to detach himself away from you, now all he desires is to embrace you without any intent of letting go. Though his mixed feelings does earn plenty of teasing from the likes of Sharena and Anna, he does not mind their comments, especially when he eventually approaches you, his arms ever so eager to wrap around and hug you close, his mouth seeking to press against yours.

#fire emblem awakening #fire emblem fates #fire emblem heroes #kamui (fire emblem)#niles (fire emblem)#robin (fire emblem)#lon'qu #libra (fire emblem)#leo (fire emblem)#odin (fire emblem)#hinata (fire emblem)#shura #ashura #alfonse (fire emblem)#corrin #support fluff #anonymous #management will return in a queue minutes

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