#Cycle breakers

[thepeacefulgarden]

[the-cessation-cathedral]

Some background lore for the main studio cast…. For short, they’re all dead people trapped in the cycle -WD

(Feel free to ask any of the Cycle Breakers too!)

[scarlet-cookie]

Disappeared again and then coming back after realizing : wait, I have tumblr! Is very crazy

Anyhow I will immortalize these silly thoughts I had on the internet forever

Cyclebreakers but at one point Henry got so bored in his containment chamber he starts telling the rest about his cycle shenanigans while they try to remember dirt about Joey and the studio to tell Henry in return and in the end they all just have a therapeutic gossip session.

Henry : Yeah- crazy, right? Like, 400 something times.. just listening and watching the world go by..

Sammy : I wouldn’t want to imagine how that felt like. Sucks for you. Bertrum : Second that.

Alice : Truly terrible

Projectionist : (Unholy screeching)

Sammy : ….Anyways anyone wanna hear more about Joey’s embarrassing moments that I just remembered?

Henry : Spill the tea

[uschi-the-listener]

When I was a kid, it was immediately evident that I was the wrong person. I was supposed to be a boy named Robert. I was supposed to be blue-eyed and have curly blonde hair.

As I grew, I was even more disappointing. I was not a genius. I learned to read and write at a normal age. I couldn't spontaneously play the piano or compose witty doggerel. I was a loving child who needed affection, most disappointing of all.

I was unwanted and unloved, which was brought home to me all day, every day. I was Stupid and Clumsy and Cowardly and Ugly. I was unwelcome. Anybody could hit or kick or scratch or mock me. If I was bullied, it was clearly my own damn fault. If I tried to fight back, I was a Monster.

I escaped from that family and married into a slightly better one, though similar. I was still the wrong person, but better is better.

And then, I became pregnant. Years later, so I knew I had no idea how to be a good parent. All my "maternal instincts" were dead wrong. After all, I had learned them at the unwilling knee of the absolutely wrong mother.

So I went to the library and borrowed all their parenting books. I went online and bought some I had heard of but couldn't find. I read them all.

I talked to mothers whose kids seemed happy. I watched families at parks and playgrounds and wherever families went.

I tried to train myself to be a good mother. I knew I could never hope to be the perfect mother, but my kid, no matter what, was never going to be treated the way I had been. So I trained hard.

When my kid was born, I could not imagine looking at them and seeing someone wrong. I couldn't imagine not loving them or seeing their perfection. My kid was, and still is, Smart and Graceful and Courageous and Beautiful . . . And much, much more.

Yes, I made mistakes. Every time I wanted to react with violence or cruelty or shaming, I stopped. There were a lot of hesitations and delays, and occasionally, very rarely, I lost it. And made amends after, but no amends is better than not having lost control.

My kid isn't a kid any more. But they are still as wonderful as a person can be.

I think probably the best thing I ever did for them was to just get out of the way and let them grow into who they were. Offer support and protection and approval and a little guidance, but mainly, get out of the way.

My mom is dead, and for the last 30 or so years before she died, we had no contact. My kid was never in her life, as Mom started making things up about them before she even met them. I didn't want my kid exposed to any of that.

My kid and I have a good relationship. They grew up strong and independent. I am so proud of him. I am his Mom.

[bandofchimeras]

more unsolicited advice for poor girls & queer & trans kids: - do NOT MARRY THE UPPER CLASS GUY FOR STABILITY and confuse it for love. - do NOT have his children without a PRENUP & a childcare & custody agreement set up in advance. - you ARE marrying your in-laws. if they look down on you and see you as unworthy of their son, it WILL impact you and any children you have. - re kids: you are making an economic decision. raising children is a full-time job. ensure you are being adequately compensated. - if you can help it, NEVER mask your queerness for this kind of "getting stable" relationship - it will just stunt you late into your midlife and give you a lotta baggage to work through. -usually rich/upper class guys have emotional problems they will feel it is part of your agreement to tolerate & accommodate. be aware, pay attention to red flags or warnings from friends as you are entering an economically dependent position.

If it seems too good to be true, it probably is!

_______________________________________________ Stay safe, and remember if you find yourself being financially, emotionally, or physically abused, there is help out there! Domestic Violence Hotline for US: 800-799-7233 An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Stay smart, remember your worth, stay connected to a community of equals...and FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE is key!

[calltoamentor]

Meaning, Legacy, and What's in a Name

Middle names are one of the few ways women carry on a legacy within the family that has nothing to do with men. What do you do, then, when that legacy is entrenched in generational trauma?

Daily writing promptIf you had to change your name, what would your new name be?View all responses Mackenzie is about as standard of a middle name as you can get for girls in the United States, right up there with Marie, Lynn, and Paige. Funnily enough, all middle names you will find at least once in my family–the first of which you will find at least half a dozen times over.Women in my family…

[funcoolchickie]

[ryandjaxon]

Eventually you can find a mutually beneficial relationship. One way to manage rejection is by imagining you’re an FBI informant attempting as a honey 🍯 pot. Lol! JK! Skip ⏭️

[jay-wasstuff]

Oh my fucking god.

[free-my-mindd]

10/10 recommend

[punkpandapatrixk]

❤️‍🩹I Just Want to be Loved ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

We attract terrible loves for various reasons; so many lessons; but now sorrow has got to lessen. Let’s reveal patterns by exhuming roots. We’ve got to stop this cycle of disappointments. Done being made to feel as if we’re hard to love.

We’re not hard to love. Many of us were simply denied love, warmth and affection as we were growing up… Don’t know how to love self; don’t know how to love others; basically don’t know how to even receive Love… Who’s to blame now?

Why the hell were so many children denied love, warmth, affection…?

What are you going to do with yourself when you were denied love, warmth and affection as you were growing up?

☆♪°・.

‘The child who isn’t embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.’ – an African proverb

People denied warmth and affection tend to fall into a desperate loop of fishing for attention as a result of love-deficiency, right? Some learn to lick love off a knife; some pursue success (whatever that means) all too frantically; some…shoot complete strangers in broad daylight; and some who ain’t got the guts to murder complete strangers in public places go instead for antagonising strangers on social media… Gosh, that is desperate.

But you know what, not all hope is lost because there’s still plenty of us who are blessed with this incredibly RARE thing called self-awareness. There are plenty of us who will take our traumas to the graveyard than pass them down the next generations.

You, don’t deserve to have your sanity and your Life ruined by some psychos who didn’t know how to love you. Reclaim lost pieces of yourself by understanding THREE Houses in your natal chart, babe:

4th House: your roots; tells you what was lacking in your home; explains your erratic 10th House ambitions

8th House: your marriage or your desire for a bond like it; this the House where trauma manifests itself in full spectrum

11th House: your wish fulfilment; where you connect with people who support your visions; breeds a healthy sense of connection, even community

SONG: Emptiness by BoA

MOVIE: Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961)

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 2] [Part 3]

[Patreon] [Paid Readings]

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – Because I Can’t Even Trust Myself

VIBE: Trust by Hamasaki Ayumi

lost pieces (pertaining to 4th House) – Ace of Pentacles Rx

It’s clear your childhood didn’t offer a sense of stability or security—the physical kind that children usually need. It could be that a grownup left early or it could be that you moved around a lot, so you easily lost contact with new friends you’d just made. In essence, it feels like you grew up feeling ‘everything disappears eventually; everyone leaves eventually’.

Some of you might’ve grown up not having a lot of material resources, but for the majority of you tuning into this Pile, it was more a feeling of a lack of warmth. For children, the pain of neglect and a lack of emotional connection do really affect our physical health more severely. You might’ve grown up poor and sickly due to all the grownups around you being inattentive, unaffectionate, and just…unreliable at best.

Because of this awareness, from a young age you realised you would have to do everything yourself. You wanted to grow up quickly and do your own things your own ways. It’s not like you had to grow up fast, you wanted to grow up fast to have your freedom and power! It was…hard to trust adults. It was hard to trust the world at large.

growing pains (pertaining to 8th House) – 8 of Pentacles

On the path of growing up, I think you became a hard worker of sort? This is very nuanced though—there are layers to your developing yourself to become a hardworking person. In many ways, you grew up responsible because you didn’t want to become like the adults who had disappointed you. But since this sense of ‘responsibility’ is a product of neglect and trauma…this is coming off as your feeling responsible for everything. Everything!

Some of you could’ve been too hard on yourself, expecting way too much for your age. You’ve felt like you’re always the one with everything to prove. It’s hard living like that. It feels like you’ve put so much effort into keeping everything together, and yet, nobody sees how much you care. Nobody truly understands the fear in your mind and pain you carry in your heart.

In matters of relationship, you cling extra hard to friends or lovers, too; because deep down you’re afraid of losing things and people, again and again. This unhealthy attachment—and to some extent, controlling behaviour—is truly your wounded inner child attempting frantically to keep your Reality from falling apart…

reclamation (pertaining to 11th House) – 4 of Cups

I’m very sure that at some point in Life, your Higher Self and team of Spirit Guides are going to kick in and meddle with your Earthly business. For some people, it’s possible you could lose contact with everybody you’ve ever known in Life and go into a hermit mode to find yourself again. For some, it could be that your whole Life is simply flipped, without necessarily losing key people in your Life, for you to look at Life and human connections from a very different point of view.

It’s going to be hard, of course. Emotionally, it could be devastating. Themes of abandonment and betrayal are big in your incarnation. But you know, ultimately, all of these challenges serve to remind you that the Cup of Love and Affection you’ve been looking for has always been right inside of you. You’ve had a bitter time with a lot of people because deep down you couldn’t trust them. You couldn’t trust other people’s loyalty because you didn’t even believe that you’re worthy of that Love and Loyalty you yearn for.

Your Spirit Guides are saying, that although at some point in Life things are going to get really tough, know that when you’ve graduated those lessons, you’re going to be rewarded with the most beautiful Soulmate-shit friendships, familyship and relationship. Truth be told, part of your Soul’s scenario in this incarnation is to find your Soul Tribe; and find your Tribe you shall~

A L O N E🔻💗

ALL of you – Red Alchemist (John Dee)

becoming ONE and whole – Priestess of Healing

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – Misled by My Own Compassion

VIBE: Cry Me A River by Julie London

lost pieces (pertaining to 4th House) – Knight of Cups

It’s very likely your 4th House is in a Water sign, but if not, you’re still very much a Water-y person; perhaps your Ascendant or Moon is in a Water sign, or that you have Neptune/Moon near/in your 4th, 7th or 11th House. All of this generally makes you a deeply compassionate person. No matter what outer appearances give, you strive to look deeper into a person’s Soul. You have so much empathy and you want to believe in the good of people.

Alas! This rotten world doesn’t make it too easy. This world is not a world where kindness and compassion are truly rewarded, if we don’t learn to be a tad cruel ourselves. You’re not in the wrong for being so genuinely good and compassionate; it’s this world that’s the wrong world. You know that? Therefore, it is paramount you learn to be a bitchilante! But I’m getting ahead of myself.

In spite of this PAC’s intro, I sense the majority of you tuning into this Pile actually grew up quite well. Many of you actually grew up in loving homes and that’s why it’s been quite challenging for you to grapple with the realness of the ugliness of the world outside of your loving home. Really…people in the real world…are monsters! And you were taken aback!

But some of you instead most likely grew up in chaotic, battlefield-esque homes and that’s why you’ve striven to be so good to a point of detriment.

growing pains (pertaining to 8th House) – 0 The Fool Rx

Be that as it may, you being you… Well, you do put in the effort to try and understand what makes monsters the way that they are, right? It’s all good and wonderful, until you get yourself in deep trouble where nobody can save you but your own monstrosity. Depending on your age when reading this, this could be something that’s happened in the past or will happen; where you will be forced to grow up in the sense of seeing the world as it is and get firm with assholes!

Dr Jordan Peterson has this gold shit to summarise this spiritual lesson you will be taking at some point in Life: ‘You should be a monster, an absolute monster, and then you should learn to control it.’ Well, that’s male speech. In female speech, we just say: ‘you gotta grow up and be a bitchilante!’

Be a bitch only to those who deserve it. How would you protect yourself from monsters if you don’t have the strength to fight them at their own game, darling? If you’re harmless, weak as a fawn, if anything, the real monsters in the world are going to toy with your sanity: ‘I saw my “crazy” side once and decided I wouldn’t be involved with anyone that would take me out of my peace like that ever again.’

Be a bitchilante. That whole concept of ‘good, harmless, love and light, positivity-only’ bullshit was put out there not to really make you good but to weaken you against the truly monstrous ones. WAKE UP, BITCH!

reclamation (pertaining to 11th House) – 4 of Pentacles

So? So what if you’re selective with your affection? Not everybody deserves your compassion. That’s for sure. There are many people in the world and you can’t be nice to all of them. One at point or another, you’re gonna be a villain in someone’s story—so what? Everybody else is the main character of their own Stories; that, you can’t control.

Be careful that you’re not falling victim to your own narcissism in wanting to be praised in everybody’s Story, yeah? So then, pertaining to your 11th House, weirdly enough, your wish fulfilment is in the form of a psychological liberation from your own idea of yourself in the minds of others. I sense that if you’re East Asian this is gonna resonate much harder and louder LOL

Anyway, I want to assure you that once you’ve graduated from your spiritual lessons, you will be met with unique, courageous, rebellious weirdos who will be just as clear as you are about what it truly means to be a good person in a world that’s often very bad. How good should a person be to truly be considered a good person?

‘If I offended you, cry me a river. I’ll bring snacks and a raft. I will literally float down your tears eating chips and working on my tan.’ – Fuckology

A L O N E🔻💚

ALL of you – Green Geographer (Gerardus Mercator)

becoming ONE and whole – Priestess of Success

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 3 – Lights Out; I’m Out to Find Myself

VIBE: To. X by Taeyeon

lost pieces (pertaining to 4th House) – Ace of Cups Rx

I’ve to preface this Pile by saying this the pile that gets a little violent…

You were originally such a positive, happy-go-lucky kid, but quite early on, this world gave you so much darkness. So many reasons to be sad. It’s not been a very kind life, to be honest. Defo many of you have tragical placements here—your 4th or 5th House could start or end in Scorpio; have Lilith/Pluto/Chiron/Saturn there or in the sign of Cancer/Pisces; or it could be that your Venus/Moon is imprisoned in the 8th or 12th House and harshly aspected, too...

If your childhood has been violent or mightily confusing, it’s a group thing, OK? You can think like that. It’s not your fault. Know that practically everybody who has these harsh placements has gone through very similar things as you. So you’re really not the only one who’s failing—whatever that means. You’ve been gaslit a lot into believing there’s something wrong with you, but it was your environment that was just filled with totally terrible Human beings. That much I’d like to assure you.

It wasn’t natural how you were abused psychologically and emotionally. The people around you drew a parallel to Cinderella’s stepsisters in the Disney classic. It’s ridiculous like that. I think you grew up terribly lonely and created comfort characters in your head to console your sorrows? It’s very likely that your comfort characters were in actuality a mirror fragment of your Soul Family’s existence locked in your memory bank.

growing pains (pertaining to 8th House) – XIV Temperance Rx

Life, unfortunately, isn’t a Disney movie. As a result of the psychological and emotional abuse you’ve endured in childhood, your friendships and relationships might’ve been quite turbulent, at times even violent. Juuust a small number of you could’ve dealt with being called a violent kid, or you could’ve struggled with anger management and have terrible tantrums. All of these have made human connections quite difficult to navigate.

It’s not like you want to be a nasty person, right? Many times, you couldn’t help the way you react/respond to what’s being said and unsaid because, somehow, there are many things that people do and say that trigger a trauma response in you. There’s a very difficult Mars thingy going on here. I think many of you resonating with this Pile have some difficult Mars (ruler of Scorpio) placements/aspects that affect the way you manifest human connections in your Life.

Speaking in terms of synastry, it could be that you’ve attracted a great deal of people whose Mars aspected badly in your natal chart—consequently triggering bad traumas and manifesting violent outbursts in your connections. Ultimately though, these negative experiences with other people could’ve enforced your belief about how unlovable you are, which, really, is a false belief…

reclamation (pertaining to 11th House) – 5 of Wands

It is a false Reality that you’re unlovable or unworthy of a healthy relationship. That bullshit was implanted in you through the creation of a harsh environment that caused you a great deal of rage. Of course, you’re accountable for how you behave towards other people, but your foundation was never quite healthy or peaceful or harmonious, so… How about we put it all behind us and focus on healing? After all, it’s not like the people you’ve had a beef with were completely innocent? XP

It's kinda selfish to think like that, but you can depend on your own discernment to distinguish who amongst the people you’ve hurt or had a beef with to apologise to. Remember: sometimes apologies only make you weaker and looking at the unique bullshit astrological placements you were born with… apologising to the wrong fucker would only get you gaslit even more! So, don’t. Don’t apologise for the distress you experienced under other people’s lack of support.

Burn that bridge and detach yourself from that old stinking world. With your sheer willpower, you have it in you to rebuild your own little world of love and peace. After all, those harsh placements you were born with, are you aware of just how much power they bestow you? These placements come with a lot of turbulences but once you graduate your first Saturn Return, they also give you a burst of power unlike any other!

Lights out. Not entertaining aenergies that seek to nip your power at the bud anymore. Burn, baby, burn strong! Burn the whole Tower and find yourself on new lands~!

A L O N E🔻💜

ALL of you – Gold Alchemist (Roger Bacon)

becoming ONE and whole – Priestess of Solitude

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 2] [Part 3]

[Patreon] [Paid Readings]

[thepeacefulgarden]

[tag-devilish]

I have a project to present to you,

dear creatures. One close to my heart that -should it come to fruition- will require your participation. A couple years ago I made a design, The cycle breaking Ouroboros. My skills have grown since then and I try to do a redraw of said design every year.

I’ve seen a few people get this design tattooed on them, I’ve sold a lot of tattoo passes of this particular design but sadly; I have yet to actually tattoo this design on anyone myself.

I aim to fix that this year; but I want to be specific. I really want to do a series of tattoos with variants of this design—featuring different types of snakes on different people. People who have all broken cycles in some manner. If the participants are open to it, maybe we could record the session and talk a little about life. If they rather be private, then we can just record the tattoo process itself.

For these tattoos I’d like to ask for below my minimum, so I can get supplies - $60

and to ensure the participants are serious and will commit to a session.

I’m located in the mountains of Southern California and if this is a project you’d like to be involved in please message me and let’s set something up. This is an idea close to my heart and it will be handled with sensitivity and earnestness. Ultimately this is art I wish to create that requires the collaboration of very special canvases and I hope perhaps I can find them.

Cheers to the cycle breakers.

-Tag

[ao3-anonymous]

Fastest Growing Fandoms on AO3 This Week (07/15/2024)

Every week I pull data on how many fics are in each fandom and compare to the previous week, then calculate the percentage increase to determine fastest growing fandoms.  Since this naturally skews towards smaller fandoms, I have included the same data filtered to Over 1k, 5k, & 10k fics.

Overall:

Over 1,000 Fics:

Over 5,000 Fics:

Over 10,000 Fics:

Source: AO3 Fandom Dashboard

[visenyaism]

rhaegar dying on the banks of the trident, potential forever unrealized, rubies washed away in the current of the river and preserved only insofar as the story and memory of the battle -> viserys fighting the battle of the trident in his mind over and over as a coping mechanism, powerless to do anything but mythologize his own family history which is itself pointless because the battle already happened there’s no looking back->daenerys calm and resolute. in her dreams there is a new battle on the other side of the river, and she melts the ice into dew. thinks to herself: it is time to cross the trident. she does. she will. do you see it yet do you get it

[bandofchimeras]

it objectively Good 4 me not to talk 2 my parents :) they simply can exist over there. Owing me nothing and I owe nothing in return. This is fine. I escaped and began a new life. Friends and companions will come slowly but surely as this newfound freedom is exercised. I'm watching Mallrats and eating sherbet tonight. I'm drawing on all the walls. Someday I will have a child and raise them with multiple partners in a broad and loving if messy community. They will be able to say they come from a union family and listen to their dad sing Kimya Dawson in the mornings. They will not have to fight and scream and ultimately fall silent against the weight of their own neglect. Everyone who raises them will be expected to treat them with all dignity and respect due to every living creature. We will wonder at the calls of birds and learn the language of the land, how to speak with our hands and raise our voices strong, and no cop, no abuser, no small minded bigot will ever cut our spirits down. I don't always mean to prophesy but this is one I stand by. It doesn't matter if the kid comes from my body or anothers, they will learn their roots and respect the soil, and be raised on so so so much fucking love. And if by then their grandparents have come around enough to love them too, they'll be welcome at our table same as anybody. For now, a peaceful silence. The chasm between us fills with the tide and the mood rises over it. We're just across the river, as soon as you all decide to cross it. On the side of peace.