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#Damian and the batkids need to mess around like real siblings
frownyalfred · 8 months
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I don’t think the other batkids give Damian enough shit for calling himself the “blood son.”
like what do you mean you’re proud of being related to that man? Bruce can’t maintain an emotional conversation for more than two seconds, drinks raw egg yolks, and walks into walls after not sleeping for 72 hours. he keeps flirting with his enemies and knows every Jeopardy answer before the prompt is fully read and he ruins it for everyone by saying it out loud every time. him????
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sleeping-lilies · 3 years
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robin era jason, dick, and babs headcanons because there’s too much comedic potential to ignore
- dick and babs were the ultimate gossip buddies. whenever dick was with the titans for long periods of time, babs always filled him in on everything
babs: dick you’ll never believe what hal said to bruce last night, i even have videos. dick, the look on his face please—
dick, immediately locking doors so his teammates don’t hear the mad shit about to be dropped on main: tell me everything
- vice versa too, dick filled babs in on everything going on with the titans and all they can say is thank god those lines are bat secured with no villains being able to listen in, imagine deathstroke hearing through bat gossip that joey’s dating who?!?! 😳
- batkids have been and always will be the holder of superhero gossip. it’s a business, you see, but we’re getting off topic 😡
- lmfao anyways this is literally how dick finds out about jason
babs: anyways, jason—
dick: who the fuck is jason
babs: ....
dick: barbara?!?!
babs: ok promise you won’t freak out
- babs and dick’s first reaction upon meeting jason being “why is he so small i wasnt that small” “dick you were literally nine when you were robin—“ “he’s tiny” it’s like those two share the same braincell
- i’m making it so that dick gave jason his number earlier because i feel like it 😡😡😡 (not that it changes much other than the fact that i want more gossip dropped in dm’s)
- when dick gave jason his number, he went to babs like “give me jason’s number” “didn’t you literally just give him your’s?” “ya but i’m gonna make sure he texts me” “ya ok that’s fair”
- whenever jason didn’t want to be in the manor (fight with bruce, boredom, etc) he went to wherever the fuck babs lived and they would facetime dick and talk mad shit. it was a thing.
- despite them all being able to drive, babs was the only one during this time with an actual, legitimate, legal license (jason was too young to have a license and dick is too lazy/busy/whatever-excuse-he-wants-to-use to take the permit and driving test) so babs drove them around everywhere and it was a mess™ consisting of a bunch of backseat drivers
- “dick omg look at this video i found from the batcave” “omg he said robin gives him magic” “robin gives him magic” they both cry about it for years to come
- babs sometimes kidnapped jason after school after telling the head of wayne manor (alfred) and took him to get ice cream, then to the library while she worked. jason was the greatest kid in the library, he even had his own throne special chair just for him whenever he came provided by library staff who adored this absolute angel.
- jason 🤝 babs 🤝 dick -> i believe in annoying yet endearing nicknames supremacy
- nicknames include (some used by some more than others or just one, or by both equally because they’re annoying pick and choose my good people)
little wing (iconic, we all know this one fellas and who uses it)
red (used for babs, absolutely fantastic, but in the future it gets confusing because some people with their goddamn hero names 😡)
boy wonder (classic, babs calls them both that)
barbie (for babs, jason uses this one and he’s the only one able to get away with it)
dickie (jason just really gets away with everything huh)
dickhead (jason’s lucky he’s cute)
baba black sheep (jeez i’m on a roll with babs’ nicknames she’s so nickname-able and that’s very cool and sexy of her)
jay z
jay allen
jay jay jay (shut up, dickhead—)
big bird
and a bunch more i’m too tired to look for them in canon or make new ones up, but you get the idea
- dick can totally bake, and babs and jason keep bugging him when he’s baking and add more chocolate chips while pretending to not notice that he can see them 😡😡😡
- headcanon that jason had hero worship for babs and dick because they’re so cool in and out of costume and it never really went away when he got older listen his older brother and pseudo sister are so cool and that’s not his fault but he’ll never admit it
- barbie movie marathons because barbie is an iconic legend and they all recognize it. they have the fucking “she’s the queen of the WA-A-A-AVES” song memorized along with all other barbie movie songs, they sing it on patrol.
- dick and jason’s sibling dynamic was and is basically “ur a little shit and i hate you but i will literally kill for you”
- dick had tension with bruce while jason was just a little shit who would totally cause drama for the sake of it, and people never take advantage of this absolute power duo for destroying bruce
- dick sending cryptid texts to jason through a burner phone because he’s dramatic jason totally knew it was him about things that drive bruce mad, like leaving the shower turned to the coldest setting before bruce got there, leaving the lights in the batcave on, etc. jason, a wise little child, totally took advantage of this. bruce came to accept his fate
- the gc names, guys the group chat names
- jason crashing into titans tower whenever he wants and dick doesn’t bat (hAH) an eye, occasionally he very sweetly asks babs to come with him and she agrees but only sometimes because some people have jobs, jason—wait dick is being flirted with by who?!?! i’ll leave it up to your imagination ;) and they totally crashed titans missions too
- one time bruce was busy with the league while alfred was on vacation and bruce absolutely could not dip (i’m imagining bruce getting a call from the headmaster during an honest to god fight and bruce just picking up while punching the daylights out of some asshole) (“mr wayne, what is that noise in the background?” “sorry, headmaster, the cat is having a seizure”), so when jason got into a “fight” (read: some jackass picking on jason before he snapped and yelled at him and the bitchass kid tried to punch him and jason’s no quitter) bruce called dick who was an adult and legally family (yes dick is adopted sometime after jason was, stay mad) like “son... son please” and dick was like “oh no need to plead with me, this is too good” but of course this bitchass doesn’t have an actual lisence yet and he was hanging out with babs anyways so he and babs rolled up to gotham academy and the kids stared at them like “holy shit they’re so cool” ya dick and babs are those power couple, whether romantic or not, that turn heads, they’re just that powerful strolled into the office, bailed jason out while intimidating the headmaster because the altercation was the result of school staff negligence of actual bullying like those cliche tropes, said “ayyy you got that brat good” and get him chili dogs or whatever the fandom made robin jason’s favorite food. omg i just made an entire fanfic in rough draft form someone please steal it and write it in full form and send me the link
- jason is very very tiny, you see. babs and dick pick him up and move him for any reason, whether because they want to sit on that chair or to just throw him out of harm’s way and take the bullet for themselves.
- jason and dick both get adorable blushes on their faces it’s genetic yes that’s how genetics work shut up meanwhile babs’ ears turn red when she’s embarrassed and all three of them clown each other for it
- i yelled about this to my mutual (cough cough @littlespaceboii) who also added to this absolute dogshit headcanon and then in the discord full of mutuals, but the basement of wayne manor is haunted. dick found it when he was a little gremlin (i stand by that dick was the original demon child) (“you see damian, before there was you there was me” the real reason he was good with damian lmfao) and was like “omg this is so cool” @littlespaceboii came up with that it was just alfred fucking with bruce and so when jason first came and dick was comfy around him he was like “so have you been in the basement” and jason was like “im literally robin i’ve been in the batcave?!?!” and dick goes “no the basement, the haunted one” and jason’s like “hAUNTED?!?!” cuz jason has at least some self preservations and knows not to fuck with the spookies until he too became a spooky and bruce was like “there’s no ghost it’s not haunted” because he’s a skeptic and a party pooper and babs is like “no go on let him finish” even though she knows full well there are no ghosts or does she? and uhhhh basically they becomes ghostbusters 2.0 but cooler and funnier
- this trio is basically baby pan/bisexual jason and two resident expert pan/bisexuals solidarity but that’s literally canon. they go to pride every year that jason’s alive what who said that?
- they all tease each other for their crushes like all siblings/family friends do, i don’t need to say it but it’s important that’s emphasized for my well being
- yelled about this in the discord to the mutuals who added onto this absolute train wreck too, but jason used to play baseball during his robin days, and dick never showed up to those games with being busy as an excuse, but babs always showed up with bruce and alfred and took pictures for dick so dick could be like “mlb players are jobless now that little wing is on the scene” babs (and sometimes bruce) always shouted loudest for jason whether he was in the field or in the dugout and jason would get this extremely adorable blush on his face (jason finds out in the future why dick never showed up (cough cough ptsd from two face’s massive baseball bat which led to everything that came after including being fired and veangance academy and nearly killing two face and omg that’s a ride) and is like oh my god my childhood is even more ruined—)
- remember when i said dick got adopted after jason did in this new absolutely fabulous canon i just created? bruce did that because “ahhh fuck that’s my kid and i want him to know i love him through every means possible since i have the ability to do so” i believe in good dad bruce supremacy and made a whole thing where he invited dick to dinner for like a week to work up the courage and bonding to ask him and show him the adoption papers and then everyone cried :) bruce decided to finally adopt dick after jason referred to dick as his brother and bruce was like “...oh” and alfred was like 👀
- dick, as the first child hero and one of the first heroes period like at least a year or two before babs, holds the “back in my day” card over literally everyone in the hero community in general and pulls it out to annoy babs and jason even tho babs literally joined the scene only a year or two after dick
jason, shaking in his panties: it’s so fucking cold
dick, standing strong in his tits out outfit, who had to wear the panties on his own decision: oh, you’re cold? back in my day—
babs, throwing her boot at his face: god shut the fuck up—
and then dick doesn’t give back her boot and it becomes a whole thing with lots of tackling and play fighting and someone nearly gets thrown off they rooftop for funsies but anyways
also on a side note, babs would take off her cape and wrap it around jason whenever she noticed his discomfort with the weather, or use the weather as an excuse whenever she saw him uneasy for whatever reason and they never mention it to each other
- yelled about this in the discord to the mutuals at some point too holy shit i have friends, but those three are team rocket. they went out as team rocket for halloween one year after bullying bruce to let jason out only jason because he can’t tell dick and babs what to do and jason is under his care and when they do convince him, dick and babs bully jason into being meowth. manifesting jason in a meowth onesie ARTISTS PLEASE—
- dick finally took his license seriously and took his driver’s test after babs became paralyzed.
- those were a rough few months for those three. and then another rough few months for those two
- yikes, sorry to throw angst at you (sorry (unfeeling)) anyways, in the future alfred finds those old photos and shows the rest of the fam, so dick and babs bully jason, 6’2 jason that towers way above both of them, and once again bullies him into being meowth “for tradition, little wing!” “shut up, dickhead” the rest of the batkids lose their shit over this, naturally. bruce and alfred stand in the back teary eyed reminiscing the old days when things were a little more simple.
- discowing walked so terrifying handsome squidward red hood helmet could run (even tho the ugly helmet tripped and fell and missed the mark because discowing wasn’t ugly and will always remain superior, i feel i have committed a terrible crime comparing the two)
dick: jason what the fuck is that
jason: it’s fashion
dick: it’s terrifying
jason: i’m only following in my older brother’s footsteps 😔
dick: listen here, you little shit strangles him haha just kidding that illegal wait theyre vigilantes they don’t follow the law—
- these three and cass refer to the rest of the batkids as “the kids” (if she’s older than jason, sometimes she is and sometimes she isn’t and i’m really confused but whatever)
- babs and dick’s relationship with jason pre death literally shaped how jason treats his siblings post pit madness like he literally goes “what would red and big bird do?!??” when he needs to go into big brother mode over the “little ones” (“little” because tim and steph are adults and duke is nearly an adult himself oh my god he’ll graduate from high school soon and jason never got to do that himself he’s totally going to the ceremony legally dead or not) 🥺
- holy trinity continue hanging out with each other, whether lunch or games or whatever, and just enjoy each other’s company after long, rough years
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sun-moon-stars-jedi · 3 years
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Batfam Ficrecs - Part 3
Don’t have anything to read during the holidays? No problem, here are some great Batfam fanfics. Most of them are fairly recent, so hopefully you’ll find something new. The focus is on fluffy and funny gen Batfam stories, but I also included a few H/C stories and two JayRoy ones.
My other Reclists for fluffy Batfam fics are here and here if you’re looking for even more. Have fun reading =D
Short and Sweet Stories:
How To Break Up A Knife Fight by RubyofRaven (Gen, 1.5K, Rated Gen): In which Alfred is away, Bruce has an emergency, and someone needs to be left in charge. Family fluff Batfam style with a perfect ending.
A Hindering Hand by collectivefandomstuff (Gen, 4.3K, Rated T): When Dick is refused the opportunity to coddle Damian, he decides to lavish his other siblings with his questionably helpful assistance. They are palpably ungrateful. Dick being an annoying older brother is hilarious and sweet at the same time. Good feel reading.
Halloween Wonder by alecmagnuslwb (M/M, 1.7K, Rated Gen): Jason and Roy take Lian trick or treating and she has a specific request for their costumes. Sweet JayRoy family fluff.
Get Out Of My Room by damthosefandoms (Gen, 2.2K, Rated Gen): Dick likes to mess with his little brother. Jason enjoys being a little shit to his older brother. Everyone always says they’ll get along when they get older. They’re not so sure about that. Sweet and funny story about Dick and Jason being brothers.
Have I Told You About Minnie? by Hinn_Raven (Gen, 4.5K, Rated T): After you’ve known Matches Malone long enough, you get used to him telling you about his kids. Not that his kids know about it. Bruce is a proud dad, even when he is undercover, and can’t stop telling everyone about his awesome kids. Nice focus on the relationship between Bruce and Stephanie.
Night at the (National History) Museum by collectivefandomstuff (Gen, 7.2K, Rated T): The Batbros cause havoc at a gala and it is hilarious.
Nutella by good_ho_mens (Gen, 1.7K, Rated T): Dick just wanted Nutella, and Jason didn't feel like getting shot today.
One Wrong Step by good_ho_mens (Gen, 3.0K, Rated Gen): Damian steps on a mine and Jason refuses to leave. Also, Tim worries. Batbrothers bonding during a crisis and it is so good.
Put On Your Mask (We're Going Shopping) by shanahane (Gen, 3.2K, Not Rated): It's been... some time since Bruce has done any sort of shopping. Still, somehow, miraculously, the trip to the supermarket is a not a complete disaster. One could even describe it as successful. Wholesome Batdad with his sons.
Friends That Say (You’re Not Alone) by ProsperDemeter (Gen, 3.5K, Rated Gen): Clark visits Wayne Manor during Christmas and sees a totally different side to Bruce in how he behaves around little Dick. Sweet and wholesome, good dad Bruce and little ray of sunshine Dickie.
siblings being siblings series by envysparkler (Gen, 12.3K+, Rated T): The Batkids notice that Bruce never confronts Jason about little mistakes and start to use him as a scapegoat. It spirals from there. Super funny, especially once Jason gets his revenge.
 Hurt/Comfort Stories:
in doctor's office lighting (i didn't tell you i was scared) by good_ho_mens (Gen, 8.9K, Rated T): Tim gets meningitis and it isn’t pretty, but his family is there for him. A sickfic that goes pretty deep, including the first real look at how Tim’s missing spleen will influence his life. Hurt comfort done super well.
Tough Love by iselsis (Gen, 7.6K, Rated T): Jason finds his mother dead on the bathroom floor, but his grief is interrupted when a strange man breaks into his apartment and kidnaps him. The moment you get what is happening this story changes completely and it is so good.
Zoetic by PurpleArrowzandLeather (Gen, 4.2K, Rated T): Jason goes inside a burning building to save people who are trapped in their apartments. He doesn't come out. Emotional and sad, but so satisfying. (And Chapter 2 makes everything better again.)
Looking for Home by Team_Alpha_Wolf_Squadron (Gen, 11.8K, Rated T): Bruce and Jason are lost in the woods, not knowing how they got there, or even where they are. A little road trip even when there is no road is always good for bonding though. So, so great. Not gonna say more to avoid spoilers. Background Bruce/Clark, but that’s not really important.
Broken Bodies, Daisy Bloom Series by RandomReader13 (Gen, 15.6K+, Rated Gen to M): The Batfam during the zombie apocalypse. A very realistic take on how to survive the zombie apocalypse, with emotional family moments and the expected worst case scenario happening but with a twist.
Waylaid by Elya_Rho (Gen, 31.7K, Rated T): All Damian wanted was to spend the day alone with his father. Then Drake had to go and ruin everything by getting himself kidnapped... Damian pretending not to care about Tim while simultaneously doing everything possible to safe him is so good. Very nice Batbro story.
 In Progress:
Keeping Score by Elya_Rho (Gen, 67.3K+, Rated T): Brothers can turn anything into a competition … including saving each other's lives. Don’t worry about it being a WIP, there are no unresolved cliffhangers. The individual missions are so good and get even better with each chapter. I reread all of them several times already, so definitely worth a try.
the thing with feathers by bacondoughnut (Gen, 16.3K+, Not Rated): When Dick and Bruce go missing and Tim can't find them on his own he turns to the only other person he can think of for help, Jason. He just hopes they can keep from killing each other long enough to save their family. Jason reluctantly helping Tim, great detective work and begrudging brotherly bonding, what more could you want?
Drink Deep in the Morning by GordandV (Gen, 4.0K+, Rated T): Robin era Jason talks Dick into taking him driving. Sweet Batbrothers in an interesting magical realism AU. A WIP with only one chapter, but the world is established in such an interesting way, it’s really worth a read.
A Change Of Scenery by Sun_Moon_Stars_Jedi (M/M, 18.5K+, Rated Gen): Jason finds himself stuck in the past while Roy has to deal with the fourteen year old version of his husband. Time travel is just so much fun! I’m shamelessly putting my own fic here, it’s fluffy and funny, so if you’d like to, give it a shot.
Epic Series:
Emotional Motion Sickness Series by Batbirdies (Gen, 348K+, Rated Gen to M): A series beginning with Bruce Wayne finally deciding to go to therapy, and the ripple effect afterwards. I can’t put into words how good this series is. If you like Bruce as a good dad, who makes up for his faults and is there for his kids, you absolutely have to read this!
Flightless Birds Series by Ionaperidot (Gen, 181K+, Not Rated): A Bruce without the Batkids meets one with them. Cue Batdad collecting abandoned kids from the multiverse. The progress Bruce and each of the kids makes is amazing, an absolute must read. Slight TimKon, but the pairing is not the focus of the stories.
In For a Pound Series by Cdelphiki (Gen, 248K+, Rated Gen): Talia gives Damian to Bruce when he is still a baby and it changes everything. I’m sure everyone has already read this amazing series, but on the off chance that you haven’t, go do it. Everything Cdelphiki writes makes you feel warm and happy, family fluff of the highest quality.
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