#Gandalf was just bored

[casually-eat-my-soul]

I’m just picturing bilbo talking about courting habit of hobbits to the company (maybe ori was asking questions idk) and he off handily mentions that hobbits court via food.

Cue the company wondering that if them eating his entire pantry and him letting them means something. This increases into an argument wether over whose the better dwarf. (Not that any of them are planning on doing anything but they were trying to figure out how to let Bilbo down and it spiralled into who was the best)

“I have better hair”

“I’m a BETTER FIGHTER”

“Well I can cook, Hobbits like food and lots of it.”

Thorin is silently stewing but can’t say anything. That is until Gandalf says that the courting only counts if the hobbit themselves cooks the food for you and serves you. (He thinks the drama is hilarious and wanted more entertainment)

The entire company then remembers that only only person he technically served was Thorin with the soup he cooked.

This only makes the fighting worse, and makes Thorin more smug. Fili and Kili are outraged

“We’re both royalty and younger and more attractive. What does uncle have that we don’t”

But they use this against him when he’s being rude to bilbo “oh be careful uncle, he might trade you in for a better model”

Balin is overjoyed because bilbo is persuasive and politically smart and doesn’t like gold. Dwalin doesn’t know whether to clown on Thorin or be scared over his future as a royal guard because bilbo is somehow worse than Thorin when it comes to death defining stunts.

The rest of the company still argues up until Thorin and bilbos wedding whether or not bilbo was counting them as well. They also make bets because or course they do.

Gandalf takes great, great pleasure in claiming credit for bringing the couple together but honestly he was just looking for entertainment.

[fatedtime]

some tidbits from my brief time playing book of yog

the aforementioned pussy-out girl. genuinely I do admire the boldness.

“would you like your yae miko to be claire’s or hot topic”

“You know, it WOULD be cool if zero-2 had claws” and some genuinely interesting design-choices by juxtaposing rabbit and butterfly theming.

These two are the same person I am NOT fucking shitting you, one is a skin.

And, my favorite summonable SR —

[anghraine]

Just thinking about all the in- and out-of-universe rhetoric around Quenya as a higher linguistic form than Sindarin or Common. While I like Quenya a lot, I do find the discourse around it pretty obnoxious.

Also thinking about Gandalf, a Maia of Valinor who remembers his Valinorean name, using Sindarin for magic.

[agneswarda]

just a lil thought I need to get out of my system: love how the byler shippers in general have such a good understanding of the show, its themes, in which direction it should go. but also I worry that they understand the show much better than its actual creators. i'm worried that the hype will eventually lead to a lot of disappointment. I say so as a former believer in tjlc 🤡

[mushroomates]

legolas headcanons:

is, by all accounts, the worlds most awkward elf

most of the fellowship doesn’t even realize how weird he is

thranduil did not socialize his boy well. legolas is not aloof he just has no idea what he’s supposed to be doing.

will walk very slowly with exaggerated movements around hobbits because he thinks they won’t see him otherwise.

the hobbits thinks this is elf custom. frodo theorizes this is because elves want to rest their eyes and ears when they’re at home, so other elves like to announce themselves so no one gets spooked.

this is aided by the fact that legolas loudly announces his presence whenever he enters the room, just incase you missed it.

this conclusion is false. legolas will approach other elves by charging at them, full speed. alternatively, shooting an arrow in their vicinity for a vibe check.

he also likes shooting at people to wake them up and/or scare them

legolas likes that it’s a gentle reminder to his companions that he could kill them at any time and they should be honored that he doesn’t.

aragorn has options about this. legolas tells him that he should be grateful that such a skilled elf is on his side and cares for him. aragorn maintains that if legolas really cared, the elf would stop waking him up with ‘good morning’ shots. he also would like to note that legolas’s loud singing is only slightly better than an arrow flying at you first thing in the morning:.

legolas tries to make friends by staring at them from afar and when they look at him he looks away. like a cat. he will also blink at u as if to say “look! i like you! i’m closing my eyes!!!” again, like a cat.

will bring you small gifts to curry favor, also like a cat. interesting rocks and pretty feathers, samples of dirt, fallen leaves in different shapes and colors, and whatever flowers are near by and catch his eye. gets very upset if you don’t marvel at them for the appropriate amount of time.

will eat bites off of your plate. this is a form of endearment. he’s showing he trusts you and likes you. he’s also showing his inability to cook and hopes you’ll take pity on him by sharing your food.

sometimes will intentionally walk loudly around the camp if he’s bored, angry, or lonely so he can wake aragorn up and they can be awake together :)

likes to sing, loudly, at inappropriate times

no one in the fellowship has seen him piss. some of the hobbits are under the impression that elves don’t pee. aragorn and gandalf do not correct them.

up at the asscrack of dawn. this is annoying, because he’s chipper, looks amazing, and is a tad judgmental that you aren’t as well.

captain obvious as well as worlds most unhelpful elf ever. will point out your mistake, claim to know how to fix it and half the time not offer the solution or his assistance.

cannot do laundry. he doesn’t even get dirty enough to consider it, and with how little people in middle earth wash their clothes anyway, none of his clothes have been cleaned for easily centuries.

is very confused by dogs. doesn’t understand what he’s supposed to do with them. they’re always so happy and want (physical???) attention and,, it’s not a one and done thing either. you’re supposed to keep petting them? after you already pet them.

they’re like wolves, but smaller and maybe stupider. they also stink. boromir has explained to him many times that dogs are man’s best friend and are beautiful creatures. this worries legolas, because that means either dogs are more evolved than they let on,, or men are significantly further behind than elves than he first thought..

can not play the harp. is upset by this fact.

never really bothered to learn how to harp, either.

he believes he should be able to play the harp regardless because the harp is just a big bow with many strings. this is, in fact, false.

will eat anything. mushrooms and questionable berries mean nothing to him.

this upsets aragorn as he believes legolas is setting a bad example for the hobbits, dispite hobbits having the most durable digestive systems. (note: elves can eat almost anything, but hobbits have the stomach of a labrador retriever. they are always hungry, can can eat anything, even what they’re not supposed to)

DID set a bad example for boromir, who mistakingly ate some of the berries legolas offered him and had the shits for weeks.

is like 90% sure who frodo is. it’s definitely one of the hobbits. it’s probably not the one with the pony.

is faceblind. he can’t recognize other people’s faces for the life of him. if you asked him to pick out aragorn in a sea of humans, he’d panic dispite knowing the man for 50+ years.

this also goes for all races, including dwarves. gimli thought he might just be racist and covering his ass, but then watched him stall for like 30 minutes making small talk with some lorien elves and try (and fail) to pick celeborn out of the crowd.

does know what galadriel and thranduil look like. has a hard time pointing out elrond.

will forget your name almost immediately after you tell him. guys like 3k old and has met a lot of people give him a break

to be fair he does know who you are and what you sound/look like. defining features like voice and hair help a lot. it’s just if you were to give him a book of cropped faces and ask him to name, just one,,, he’d panic and throw it at you.

feels robbed of the golden ages,, resents the fact that the world he knows is drastically different that the world he could have been. wishes there were more elves his age and just more elves in general.

that being said he wouldn’t change this for anything as the world he’s in gave him the friends he’s made and the adventure of a life time :)

he doesn’t wash his hands. like ever or at all.

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

Not now, kitten

Written for @astrangersummer week 13

Words: 972

Prompt: Cat

Relationship: Steve/Eddie

Rated: E

Tags: Explicit sexual content; Fluff; Humor; Awkward sexual situations; Cat dads Steddie

“Pretty thing,” Eddie purrs. His breath tickles the tip of Steve’s cock, overly sensitive and slick with spit and precome. “God, I love when you're like that. You enjoying yourself, honey?” 

Steve hums his approval, stretching his arms over his head and arching his back, eyes closed in bliss. The movement is slow and lazy, and it makes Eddie’s fingers drag along that sweet spot deep inside, the one that makes fireworks explode at the base of his spine and patterns of light dance in the darkness behind his eyelids. Eddie chuckles and presses a kiss to the underside of his cock, just below the slit. 

Somebody mewls. 

Eddie laughs, low and pleased. “Love the sounds you make for me, sweetheart.” 

Steve's eyes fly open. Because, see, that wasn't him. 

A pair of big, neon green eyes stares back at him. They glow in the moonlight falling in through the curtains. 

“Eddie…” says Steve. 

Between his legs, Eddie moans. “That's right, baby, say my name.” 

Steve groans, kicking at his back with his heels. 

“No, dumbass, stop it. We've got company.” 

Eddie flinches, fingers bumping Steve’s prostrate. Steve hisses. 

“Oh hey, buddy,” Eddie coos. “What are you doing here?” 

“Mrrrp,” say the eyes. 

Eddie smiles, full of gooey fondness, then turns his attention back to Steve with a wrinkled brow. 

“All that drama just because of the cat, Stevie? You had me afraid it was Buckley again. I mean, I get why you'd want her to have a spare key, but she really needs to learn how to knock if she doesn't wanna see things, especially after-” 

“Excuse me?” Steve snaps. Eddie’s rant barrels to a confused stop. “What do you mean, just because of the cat? This isn't- … You don't- … I can't do this with him staring at me like that.” 

Steve feels Eddie shrug more than he sees it. Having a guy's fingers knuckle-deep up your ass will do that, he guesses. 

“Just leave him, he'll wander off in a minute.” 

“Alfie,” Steve says. “Go away.” 

The tiny gray cat tilts its head at him. “Mrrrewl,” it says. 

Steve groans. “Couldn't follow directions if your life depended on it, huh?” 

“That's because he's a cat, not a dog,” Eddie says, lazily propping his chin up on Steve’s thigh. “They're free spirits. Also, that isn't even his name. Gandalf?” 

The kitten's ears flick. Eddie shoots Steve an obnoxious grin and clears his throat importantly. 

“Take thine leave. My love does not wish for thou to behold him at the pinnacle of his ecstasy.” 

“What the- the pineapple of what?” Steve squawks. 

Gandalf purrs and starts licking his paw. 

“Gandalf, c’mon,” Eddie pleads. “I had a good thing going here.” 

Gandalf gives him an unimpressed side glance, using the wet paw to wash his ear. 

“I told you we should've named him Mittens,” Steve says. “I'd also refuse to answer to that, if I were him.” 

Eddie grumbles something unintelligible under his breath. 

“Ignore him,” he then mumbles, kissing the inside of Steve’s thigh and curling his fingers just so. Steve gasps, eyes fluttering shut without his own conscious doing. “He'll get bored and leave. All you need to focus on right now is this …” 

Steve tries, he really does. Tries to focus on the feeling of Eddie’s fingers scissoring him open, the feeling of Eddie’s tongue teasing at his entrance, the hot, tight sensation pooling at the base of his spine. 

“That's it, baby,” Eddie praises, and adds another finger. Steve gasps, eyes snapping open. 

“Mrrrow,” says Gandalf, inches from his face. 

“Eddie,” Steve whines. 

Eddie sighs, forehead thunking against the mattress. 

“Alright,” he relents, shuffling off the bed and scooping the confused kitten up in his arms. “C'mon, Mitt-randir. You heard your mom, time for you to go.” 

Steve leans against the headboard, gathering the sheets around himself, and watches how Eddie gently deposits Gandalf outside the door. 

“You know,” he says, once it has clicked shut and Eddie has joined him again. Eddie lifts one arm and Steve eagerly slots into the space. “I've been thinking. Maybe we should get a second cat.” 

“What, really?” Eddie chuckles, kissing the top of his head. “Says the guy who didn't even wanna get this one? What're you hoping to achieve, get double cock-blocked?” 

“Shut up, he's grown on me,” Steve grouses. “And maybe … I dunno, I thought that, if he had a friend, he'd be less bored.” 

Eddie gives a thoughtful hum. 

“Sound reasoning, good sir,” he then admits. “I can talk to Wayne, if you wanna. Someone at the trailer park is bound to have kittens at this time of year.” 

“Cool,” Steve says, tracing the black lines of Eddie’s tattoos with his fingers. “Can I name this one? Since it was my idea and all?”

Eddie sighs, burying his face in Steve’s hair. “That's fair, I guess. What noble name do you have in mind for Gandalf's future companion? Socks? Whiskers? Mr Tiddles?” 

“Nah,” Steve smiles. “It thought it would be cool if we got a little brown tabby. Name him Radagast.” 

Eddie goes still. He goes so still, Steve’s afraid he's somehow fallen asleep mid-conversation. Then, he sits up. His eyes are large and bright in the dark room.

“What did you just say?” 

Steve's smile widens. 

“I said-” he starts, but that's as far as he gets before Eddie grabs his face in both hands and crashes their lips together. 

“I love you,” Eddie says when they finally part for breath, leaning their foreheads together, fingers playing with the hair at the base of Steve’s neck. “Have I told you that?” 

“Well,” Steve hums in mock-thought, pulling him in for a brief, open-mouthed kiss before he begins to guide him down towards his spread thighs. “I believe you were about to show me.”

[invisiblewashboard]

Small Child’s Thoughts on “Helm’s Deep”

Sounds like there are way too many bad guys.

Are they happy because the king is there? Hm. Because the king will help them fight the bad guys? I feel happy when my dad comes home because he helps me fight my sisters.

I think you should maybe not listen to someone named Wormtongue. But maybe it’s not his fault that he’s named that. Maybe his mom and dad just didn’t like him.

Mom, can I have a horn to make horn blasts with? (No.) But I would only use for good things, like to tell you if there was danger!

The van? If they have vans they can have trains. (No, no, Small Child, that means “vanguard.”) Hm. That is boring. They should have a van instead.

Gimli wants to kill lots of orcs and that is very good. I like that.

Hundreds and hundreds more bad guys is not a good thing.

Lightning plus bad guys is going to equal a very bad time for everyone.

I just do not really know what is happening. You are reading lots of words but I am confused. I only know there are orcs and lightning.

Why did Legolas spend all his arrows? (Because that’s what happens in a battle.) Well, he should have just brought more with him.

I tried to jump off a wall once. And you told me it was bad. But Gimli did it and you said it was good.

Wow! 21 is a lot of orcs! Good job, Gimli. You’re doing very good work!

Two dozen? (A dozen is 12, so how many is two dozen?) Oh, I see. 24! Legolas is winning now. Who is going to get more points? I do not want to wait to find out, I would just like you to tell me now. (Just be patient! You will find out soon enough.)

How many orcs did Aragorn kill? (I don’t know, I don’t think he is playing the game with Legolas and Gimli.) Why? He should play and not ruin the fun.

So, Mama? Blasting fire is like a bomb, right? Like a big explosion? I think if they have that, they can maybe have trains soon. Trains would make things easier because they could go places fast.

Saying his spear was long seems just so unnecessary. Spears are long. That is why they are spears and not just little stumpy stabbers.

Is that Gandalf the White Rider? Good. I think things will be okay now if he is here.

Hey Mom? You told me that if I was patient I would find out who got more points. But you stopped reading and I still do not know.

[dekariosclan]

so bear with me for a second. gale with an elf. the elf is aware humans don't live too long, but isn't that great when it comes to understand the passing of time. one day gale find them crying, is all worried, just to hear that his lover is worried about his death being near. "aren't you fifty or something? humans don't live that much. how many months do you think you can take?" the deal is because gale is a wizard he got to somehow learn to live long enough (i'm looking at you elminster, gandalf, radagast). so he's like: "dear heart, we have been together for the last three centuries. are you aware of that? is very important for me that you are." in this essay i will-

LOL This made my day and gave me a laugh! I could absolutely see this happening.

First of all, I am fully confident Gale would find a way to extend his lifespan to match his love’s. No question. The man is capable of figuring out how to achieve godhood, so the small matter of finding out how to add centuries to his mortal life would be no problem at all.

Second, I think he would be amused at his love’s complete lack of awareness at how long they had been together. He’d enjoy teasing them at every opportunity: “It’s gratifying to know that even after 300 years you haven’t tired of my company yet, my love.” “Perhaps in another few centuries we will run out of things to say to one another? I shall start researching new topics of conversation immediately.”

I mean this is the man who tells a romanced Tav in the epilogue that he ‘could spend an eternity in your company.’ So the 750 years that elves live on average would be no problem at all; Gale would cherish every second with his love, and he would never grow restless or bored.

And hey, with seven centuries to live, he might actually be able to finish reading all those books in his tower, too!

[spinnenpfote6]

I think you need to consider that not only *did* Boromir obviously care about the little hobbits, as shown by the scenes he has with them, but also the book context of "We cannot stay here! It will be the death of the hobbits!" on the Pass Of Caradhas is him literally saving Frodo's life who had fallen asleep in the cold. He is described to have a weird dream about being in his cozy home where Bilbo is telling him that his journal entry for this day is boring because it's only "Snowstorms on the 12th of January!" and he doesn't need to come back if that's all he's writing and Frodo replies that he just wanted to get some rest and sleep until he jerked awake my Boromir fishing him out of the snow -who tells Gandalf that the hobbits will die in the cold if they do not get out of there. This feels like Frodo was already on the brink of freezing to death and only survived because of Boromir's watchful eyes who realizes that if one of the little hobbits has already had a brief brush with death, it will hit another one of them sooner or later.

Frodo's dream sequence reminds me of this trope where a severely injured character is unconscious and wakes up in a perfect sunny place where they get told/realize themselves that they cannot stay there because it's a metaphor for heaven (aka dying).

Kinda wish they had added this to the movie, it would've been an oddly haunting scene.

[maximwtf]

Hello person- I must say I love reading your lil fanfics always keeps me busy when It's in the middle of the night and I can't sleep lmao.

If I may, if you are still accepting requests- A Legolas x reader, where the reader isn't aware of a custom that elves have about braiding their hair and basically just accidentally confesses to him when they get bored one day and just start braiding his hair and only finds out when the Fellowship congratulates them for confessing or something along those lines hehehe

Legolas x reader

words: 1930

google docs pages: 3

warnings: none? fluff :D 

opening: One day while you’re bored, you begin to braid Legolas’ hair, unaware of its meaning to the elves. It’s only later, when you find out the message behind it. 

AN// Thank you so much for this request, love the idea! (this also gives me a reason to not write the other ideas I've been putting off xd) idk if this is a little ooc, but I hope it’s okay^^ It’s also lovely to hear that you enjoy my work!^^ Reader can be any gender !

         “A time for congratulations?”

It hadn’t been long since you had joined the fellowship from Rivendell, like most of the others had too. The only one you knew better than the others was Legolas. Him you had met more than a few times in the past, mostly as an accident, but you did genuinely enjoy his company. You’d never admit it to anyone in the group, but you were happy that he had been the one from Mirkwood to join. You heard it had been his father who had suggested befriending Aragorn to him, and it was when Legolas had begun to look for Aragorn that he had met you. Aragorn you had only met a few times, and back then only knew him as “strider” like most. The others you had only met when the Fellowship had been formed, but all of them had seemed okay. 

Now, trailing behind Legolas, you examined your surroundings silently. Old trees with roots going all across the forest blocked the view on your right and on the left only a few trees were growing, enjoying the sun they were able to get. The trees on the left casted dark shadows on the almost non existent road you were walking on. Gandalf had seemed to be very certain that there was a trail going here, but you weren’t so sure. But since no one else had doubted him, you had decided to just follow along. At least you weren’t going to get lost alone.

As your gaze moved from left to right, amazed by the sturdy old trees, being able to stand for such a long time, you noticed Legolas turning to look at you for a moment. It was only for a split second, but it made you humm to yourself. Perhaps he was happy to see you too. It was rarely that you could spend more time with him, mostly just short bump ins every now and then. He was a prince, and probably had a lot to do.

The group seemed to have noticed the darkened shadows of the trees, and decided to set camp for the night. The sun seemed to be setting, making the casted shadows even darker before the sky would begin to follow along. Spreading the darkness of the upcoming night all over.

You had agreed to take the first watch shift of the night before anyone could steal it from you. You’d rather stay up late and go to sleep than wake up in the middle of the night to take your turn. Boromir and Gimi seemed to have collected some bigger pieces of wood and some sticks that Aragorn had been able to set on fire to create a campfire. Legolas, you and the hobbits helped to bring some rocks and logs around the fire so everyone could sit. Sam had requested if he could make something to eat, and surprisingly enough no one had disagreed. The start of the night seemed to be going smoothly. 

As Sam had begun to cook some kind of a soup or a stew, everyone else had spread around the fire. Some were fixing up their weapons and others just talking. You swore you had seen Merry and Pippin bothering Boromir too. You on the other hand had found a spot close to the fire. Most of the ‘seats’ had been taken, but that just allowed you to sit closer to the warming flames of the campfire. Legolas had seated himself near you. You could hear him lowering his bow and the quiver against the log he was sitting on. Other than that and the quiet talking, the only noise you could hear was the mixing of the soup Sam was making. Sometimes the ladle would hit the edges of the saucepan, causing a small noise to break the silent gaps.The moon was only a half, but since there weren't a lot of clouds in the sky, it was able to shine its light all over the forest. At times it felt like time had stopped after the sun had started to go down, and was still shining some light over the fellowship. It was only the cold night air that let you know it indeed was almost time to go and rest. 

You shivered under your clothes, pulling the cloak closer to you, making sure it was properly over your shoulders. Something rustled behind you, and soon another cape was placed over you. A small ‘huh?’ left your mouth as you turned to look who it was. Legolas clipped the front clip shut so the cloack wouldn’t fall off of you. “You seemed cold.” He said, smiling slightly as he sat back down. “I- Thank you.” You said, still confused by the gesture. “Aren’t you going to be cold?” You then asked, feeling bad if he’d have to freeze because of you. The elf laughed lightly at your question and shook his head. “Elves can tolerate the cold better than humans, therefore you should keep it.” He explained to you. 

You had never really thought of how different you were to him. Sure, you were friends with him, but you had no idea that the elves could tolerate the cold better than humans. Maybe you’d find out something else about him as the fellowship continued. This had to only one from many things that made elves so different from you. 

You noticed that the faint light of the moon made his almost white hair look magical. The usually well braided strands of hair had opened up from the fighting the group had gone through with a few orcs earlier that day. You had noticed that the prince usually kept his hair well done, but maybe he hadn’t noticed yet. 

Not being sure if you’d embarrass him if you pointed it out, you got up and sat next to him. You weren’t an elf but you had gotten your hair done before and over the years learned how to braid hair in different styles. So without another word, you took a hold of one of the half opened braids and began to undo it completely. Legolas seemed to have tensed up for a moment and you felt his eyes on you, but to your surprise he soon turned his gaze away and let you continue. 

You braided the first strand of hair, pulling it behind his ear the way you’d seen him usually have them. After starting to fix the other one, you felt another pair of eyes on the two of you. With a quick look you found out who it was. Aragorn was sitting on the other side of the campfire with an amused look on his face. Not understanding what he had found amusing, you kept on working on Legolas’ hair. The prince’s hair was smooth and easy to work with. Humming to yourself, “you have lovely hair.” You said quietly, seeing the man shiver, but saying nothing about it. You were enjoying the moment, getting to feel closer to your friend for once. The warmth of Legolas’ cloak and the fire kept you warm and protected from the gusts of wind. The smell of the soup Sam had made was good, and it felt great to know you were going to be eating something that not only would taste good but also would be warm. You felt like you had only been eating bread and apples for such a long time. 

You finished the other braid and mixed it in with the unbraided parts of his hair. “Both are fixed again.” You hummed mostly to yourself but out loud so Legolas could hear it too. You felt his eyes on you for a moment before they moved to Sam, when he handed the both of you a bowl with some steaming soup in it. You thanked the hobbit with a nod, and began to eat. From the corner of your eye, you caught Aragorn telling Gimli something and them both silently laughing. Trying not to pay no mind to the conversation, you couldn't help but to wonder if it was about what Aragorn had found so amusing earlier?

After that night, many more passed. Some worse and some just as good, but what kept everyone going was the mission and the people in the fellowship. Legolas never mentioned anything about you braiding his hair, and he even let you do it once or twice after. But after every time, it felt like more eyes were on the two of you. It was first only Aragorn, then Gimli joined and soon even Gandalf was in on it. At times it felt like even Legolas knew what was going on. 

After some time of you being oblivious of what had been going on, you decided to bring it up. You had so many theories of what they could have been up to, that you just had to find out. Making your way from the back of the group to where Legolas, Aragorn and Gimli were, you prepared yourself. “What are you hiding from me?” This got the attention of the three, all of them slowing down their walking speed a little. “Whatever do you mean?” Legolas asked, giving Aragorn a quick look, almost as if he was trying to tell the man something. “You all clearly have been sharing a rumor or something along the lines of that.” You replied, but didn’t get an answer from anyone for a moment. “You should tell them.” Gandalf’s voice rang from the front of the group, clearly also aware of what you were talking about. “It isn’t a rumor per say.” Gimli started, looking at Aragorn for a moment, hoping he’d take it from there. You saw Legolas look away, not taking part in the conversation. “We wished to congratulate you on confessing to Legolas.” Your eyes widened for a moment, and without even wanting to, a “what?” Left your mouth. “They weren’t aware, Aragorn.” Legolas finally joined in, looking at his friend. “What is this all about?” You tilted your head. “When you braid his hair. See, to elves it has a significant meaning behind it.” Aragorn tried to explain. Your hand traveled over your mouth, clearly shocked. “And you didn't think to tell me?” You blushed slightly, smacking Legolas’ arm lightly. He stopped, taking a light hold of your hand to pause you as well. “I wanted to explain it to you but I found that..” He tried to look for words for a moment, and you let him. “I found that I cared for you that way, and I wasn’t certain if you had found the meaning yourself...” His eyes met yours again, after traveling for a moment. You stayed silent, not even noticing that the rest of the fellowship had also stopped near the two of you. “But I am aware that I should have told-” Legolas broke the silence but you stopped him before he could finish. “It’s all okay. I feel similar.” You admitted, looking away for a second. “Is this a better time for congratulations?” Gimli’s voice asked from behind you as Aragorn walked closer as well. “Yes, yes it is.” You smiled and turned back to Legolas. His eyes looked at you with admiration in them. “Gi Melin.” (I love you)

[ghost-proofbaby]

twenty four hours (modern!eddie munson x fem!reader)

HOUR FOUR

in which eddie munson and you absolutely hate each other's guts. what happens when your friends make a bet that you can't spend more than twenty four hours consecutively together?

→ tropes: enemies to lovers, forced proximity, slow burn

→ warnings: strong language, eventual smut, upside down does not exist, minors dni

→ pairings: modern!college!eddie x college!fem!reader

→ wc: 3.8+

masterlist.

spotify playlist.

◁ previous part, next part▷

4:00 ──ㅇ──────────────── 24:00

BIRDIE created a groupchat. 

BIRDIE added DINGUS, NANCE, JOHNNY, & ARGYLE 😎

DINGUS: why the fuck is my name dingus

BIRDIE: so… are we going to talk about how in love they look in that photo?

NANCE: Eddie looks like he’s going to commit a federal crime, Robin.

DINGUS: how do i change my name

ARGYLE 😎: a sign of true love my friends

BIRDIE: @NANCE SEE? he gets it. 

JOHNNY: Is this chat really necessary? 

DINGUS: guys seriously. how the fuck do i change my name?

—

HOUR FOUR - 7:00 PM

Let the record show that you don’t normally care about Lord of the Rings. You’d seen the movies out of obligation to your friends, nothing more, nothing less. You usually held complete indifference towards the trilogy. As a matter of fact, you’d nearly given Robin an aneurysm the day you’d informed them all you preferred the Hobbit trilogy over the original movies. 

Eddie, it seems, holds a similar sentiment to Robin. 

“I can’t believe you just said that to me,” he sighs dramatically, sinking into the couch and looking far more comfortable than he had previously. A bottle of cheap beer dangles carelessly in his hand. He’d decided to grab both of you one the moment this argument had begun, “You casually bring up Gandalf, and then you proceed to have the worst opinions on the greatest franchise of all time. A crime against humanity.” 

“I’m sorry,” you say sincerely through genuine laughter. 

You were laughing. You were sitting on Eddie Munson’s couch, in his apartment, laughing with him rather than at him. It was a fluke in the system, a blip in the Universe. You tell yourself it’s just the effects of the beer. 

“What’s next? You tell me you prefer Star Wars over Star Trek? Or, let me guess, you’ve never read the books?” 

He looks nice like this, at ease. This hour might be setting the track record for the longest the two of you had gone without insulting one another, and you begin to wonder why you’d never been able to hold such a civil conversation with him before tonight. The two of you might not be agreeing or seeing completely eye to eye, but there was enough agreement to keep the entire debate chugging along. 

He notices your silence as you take a sip of the beer you’ve nearly polished off, smirking around the rim of it, a bit of beer lingering at the corner of your mouth. “Oh my God. You’ve never read the books.” 

“I never said that!”

“You never said you did!”

Your mouth is open, fighting back at the curl of the corners, unable to defend yourself because he was right. “I- Who even reads anymore?” 

“Excuse me?” his voice pitches as he sits up straight suddenly, “Oh, no. There’s no way you just said that. There’s no way you don’t read.” 

You shrug, and his beer is quickly set to the side. 

“C’mon, everyone reads. You’ve got to have a guilty pleasure book.” 

“Nope,” you tuck your bottle between your thighs, and catch the way his eyes had followed the bottle before snapping back to yours, “I just prefer the movies, I guess.” 

“No one prefers the movies. You’re a goddamn liar,” he shakes his head and some of the frizzy curls fall against his collar bones rather than continuing to tickle his shoulders, “You have to read something. Romance novels, boring essays, the news. Hell, even magazines or that written porn shi-” he cuts off when you smile at the mention of magazines. “Why are you smiling like that? Stop it. It’s creepy. Do you read those porno books?”

“God, no,” you laugh. A lie - you’d certainly read excerpts from Fifty Shades of Grey he was referencing to understand what the hype was to no prevail, “Just ironic you bring up magazines. You probably consider yourself a real connoisseur, don’t you?” 

He flushes crimson. His cheeks that had tinged pink from the warmth of the beer are now flaming red. “I have no idea what you mean.”

He clearly did. 

“Right,” you drawl, “So which article in that Playboy caught your eye? The one about the psychological deep dive into what makes sex so great, or the interview with that one porn star? No, wait, I got it! It was totally the one that gave fifteen ways to drive a girl crazy-”

“It’s not a fucking Seventeen magazine,” he snaps, but the malice in his voice is dull, “There’s no lists on how to get the girl, it’s a porn ‘zine, Jesus H. Christ.” 

“I know that, do you?” you press, reveling in the brush crawling its way down the side of his neck. 

He runs a hand over his face, groaning, “I’m not even going to entertain you with an answer. Fuck off.” 

“Do you just ignore all the photos of the beautiful women?” you don’t hold back your teasing, subconsciously leaning his way as your voice lilts with sarcasm, “Ignoring all those bushes? Or maybe you just prefer the Brazilian cut?” 

“I liked it better when we were talking about your illiteracy,” he deadpans, staring straight ahead at his entertainment center. 

“I never said I couldn’t read, just that I choose not to most of the time,” you finally pull back a bit, scared to push it all too far. You pull your legs up beneath you on the couch and move the beer that has gone warm to the table on the opposite end as his, “Sue me for trying to make friendly conversation.” 

You await his expected response about how this was not friendly conversation. You start to do mental gymnastics of a way to bring up the specific model he had marked the pages of, of the eerie resemblance she bears to you and a way to push his buttons regarding it. This conversation was following your script, not his.

Or at least, it was. 

“Fine. I prefer the bush, I always find the lack of hair kind of weird,” he says, throwing you off your game effectively. He stares at you with now expecting eyes, “What about you?”

You’re grateful you’d stopped nursing the beer, or you surely would have choked, “What?” 

“What’s your preference?” he clarifies, not backing down, “On yourself, on partners. Whatever.” 

“I- I don’t- I never-” you stumble over your words, at a complete loss for an answer. It only makes him smirk as he’s now the one leaning in closer, close enough to catch the smell of his cologne concentrated on him. 

You hadn’t realized you’d adjusted the boyish smell of the apartment until this very moment. 

“See? Not so fun when you’re the one getting asked the personal questions.” 

He’s right – you shouldn’t dish out what you can’t handle him throwing back into your face. 

“Fine,” you mimic him, squaring your shoulders, “Bush.”

“On yourself or others?” 

“Myself,” there was no use in being shy now, “But also on, uh, partners. Kind of unfair to expect something from someone I wouldn’t give in return.” 

He nods in surprising consideration at the notion. His face twists as if he’s taking words you’d thrown out there so carelessly to heart, as if there’s some hidden message that even you hadn’t realized was laced in the notion. For a moment, you start to believe he’s committing the words to memory before he answers you. 

“That’s fair,” is all he says. 

A moment of intense thought for that?

“What? That’s all you’ve got to say?” you scoff, and busy yourself with the beer again out of nerves. It’s warm and bitter on your tongue, but it’s better than looking him in the eyes. Warm, honey eyes you’d never really cared to notice before.

“Yeah,” he lifts his shoulders into an offhand shrug, “I mean, what else is there to say? Like you said, you can’t expect something from someone you can’t return.” 

Another silence drags out, and this time, it’s stifling. You never thought you’d live to see the day where Eddie being quiet would bother you, but it does. The lack of words in the air is leaving too much room for thought from both of you. It’s giving you too much time to think on those warm, honey eyes and those damn dimples. Trivial things about Eddie that you don’t care to remember past tonight. 

“My friend collects vintage Playboys,” you blurt out, internally cursing yourself immediately. What a stupid conversation segway. 

Should have teased him about the dog-eared pages, you regretfully think as you dare to look his way. 

His face is surprisingly smooth, eyebrows quirking up into the frayed edges of his bangs, “Oh really?”

You nod, “Yeah. Hell of a lot more bushes in the seventies.” 

A lot less of that model you like, you silently add, once more not voicing that concern out loud.

The dimples return. Those fucking dimples. “Hm, guess I should check them out, then.” 

“She collects them for aesthetic purposes,” you continue to ramble, filling the air, unsure of why you’re even defending yourself. You’re just waiting for the other shoe to drop, for Eddie to dissect the small piece of your life you’ve offered, “It’s… It’s really cool, actually.”  

“It sounds cool,” he agrees gently. 

The other shoe is left dangling in the air, if it even continues to exist. 

You think about his earlier question, of whether you really wanted to keep up a miserable act for the entire twenty four hours. If the last hour hadn’t already solidified your answer, you knew now for a matter of fact that he had a point, even if he did proceed to insult you after the question. You didn’t want to spend this time miserable. The passing of time came easier when it was like this, all rounded-edged banter and friendly words exchanged. When Eddie Munson wasn’t being an asshole and making personal digs at you, he was actually a nice person to have around. 

You’d never tell him that, of course.

“It’s why I collect all that,” he motions his hand towards the shelving of figurines and trinkets, “I just think it’s cool, you know? I… Uh, I sort of lied earlier. Most of that shit isn’t that expensive. But it’s not about how much it’s worth money-wise, it’s just worth a lot to… to me.” 

A glimpse of crimson, a flash of vulnerability that proves that Eddie has a heart just as you do. It beats erratically, and it can bleed just the same. 

“That makes sense,” you offer in response. You may not get it, but you wouldn’t push his buttons on the topic. They may be nothing but clutter from your perspective, but the same could be said about the vintage Playboys your friend collects. The same could be said about plenty of things that are sentimental to you. “Doesn’t it get creepy, though? Like, you bring home a girl-”

“Or a guy,” he interjects, making you smile. 

“You bring home a girl, or a guy, and you’ve just got Gandalf staring you down while you make a move. Or… Or, Darth Vader?” you squint to pinpoint another figurine, “Is that Darth Vader? Didn’t you say Star Trek is better than Star Wars?” 

“Never said that,” he points at you with a tilt of his head, “I just don’t prefer Star Wars over Star Trek.”

“Have you seen Star Wars? It’s way more entertaining.” 

“Have you seen Star Trek?” he counters, but it’s clearly rhetorical as he continues on, “I like both. Having a preference for one doesn’t mean I’m completely against the other. Besides, the light saber effects are fucking incredible.” 

“So you prefer the prequels?” you ask eagerly. 

“I guess. I mean, the original trilogy is still badass and a classic,” he stands abruptly, and you’re worried you’ve said something wrong, but he just walks over to the Darth Vader figurine to pick it up and bring it back over with him as he flings down onto the couch, now several spaces closer to you rather than opposing ends, “It’s kind of hard to beat the ‘Luke, I am your father’ reveal,” his voice dips down to a deep tone, a fairly spot on impersonation, “But it was also nice seeing his origin story.” 

“Plus Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen are gorgeous,” you add, almost daring to lean over and bump shoulders with him. But you don’t. You keep what little space remains between the two of you. 

“Of course,” Eddie rolls his eyes, “The eye candy is what gets you.” 

“And the cool effects!”

“Right. Next you’re going to say you definitely watched for the plot, huh?”

“Oh, absolutely.”

“And the plot’s name just happens to be Ewan.” 

You bite down the grin that starts to ache your cheeks, because you’re not supposed to smile around Eddie this much. “Now you’re getting it.” 

The hand holding the Darth Vader figurine suddenly thrusts out in your direction, and you find yourself jumping a bit. When you don’t take it, he waves it around a bit, raising an eyebrow, “It doesn’t bite, you know.” 

“You said to not touch your shit.”

It’s a pathetic lie, you both know it. But he doesn’t know how scared you are to brush fingertips with him, how the way his arm being so close has electricity buzzing from the soles of your feet to the crown of your head. One small shift, one outreached hand, and your skin would brush his. 

It would surely be nuclear. An explosion with no survivors, least of all you. 

“Oh, c’mon. You’ve disregarded that rule the entire time, why start being a goody two shoes now?” he teases. 

Which is fine, except Eddie teases a certain way – with his entire body. His knee knocks into yours, he leans into your space, a boyish grin spreads over his lips. You’ve seen him dance around this kind of lighthearted conversation with everyone else in your friend group except you. It’s uncharted territory, and your heart nearly breaks out of your chest from its rapid racing.

You’re just lucky that there’s two layers of jeans between your knees. The nuclear explosion will have to wait for another day.

Instead of an answer, you reach out and grab the figurine nimbly by the small leg. Your fingertips narrowly evade Eddie’s and you’re eternally grateful and his arm retracts. You poke and prod, gently wiggling the red, flexible stick that serves as his lightsaber and pinch at the edges of his cape. 

In your silence, Eddie speaks, “It’s not a crazy collectible or anything, like I said. It probably would have been more valuable to keep it in its packaging, but one time Wheeler brought his little sister over while they were in town, and she wanted to see him out of the box, so I took him out. You know Wheeler, right?” 

You shake your head, inspecting the figurine even closer now. It still looks brand new; you’d never be able to tell that a child, presumably, had played with the ‘toy’. 

“Oh,” Eddie looks taken back, faltering slightly, “Sorry, I- I just sort of assumed that…. You, uh…. You had met Steve’s children.” 

“Oh!” your head shoots up from where your nose had been nearly pressed into the figure, taking in the detailing of the chest piece, “You mean Mike? I’ve heard about him, yeah. Just in passing, though.”

There’s more for Eddie to say, it’s clear in the way his mouth falls open with the corners quirked, but then you’re interrupted by a phone ringing. 

Your phone. 

Steve’s contact photo occupies the screen for the second time tonight, a ridiculous photo of him scowling at the camera in a yellow jumper while holding a can of pringles in front of him, one of his hands bringing a single chip to his pouting lips. 

“Let me answer it,” Eddie insists, holding out his hand as you stare down at the phone, still chiming annoyingly. 

“Were they supposed to call this often?” you ask, knowing well enough that Eddie didn’t have the answer. 

His hand waves in impatience, and you don’t put up a fight as you let him take the phone and swipe the answering bar, focusing instead on the Darth Vader discarded into your lap as he puts the call on speaker. 

“Hello?” Eddie answers in a chirpy tone. 

“How many times do we have to te- hold on. Munson?” Steve starts off aggressive, but his tone melts into confusion, “Why the hell are you answering her phone?” 

“Because I’ve murdered her,” he flatly replies, but his face doesn’t match his tone at all. 

He fucking winks at you. Your grip on Darth Vader tightens until you’re afraid you're about to snap it. 

“Not funny.”

“Not a joke.”

“Where is she, Eddie?” Steve sighs like an irritated parent, in no mood for games, “Please tell me you didn’t manage to make her lock herself in a room again.” 

“I told you. She’s gone. Sacrificed to the Dark Lord or whatever. Just got to go dump her body in the lake-”

You shouldn’t joke along with him, but you still whisper the correction of, “The canals.” 

“Sorry, I mean the canals.”

Another deep sigh. You can picture the way Steve was currently pinching the bridge of his nose at the two of you. 

“I heard her, you idiot. Now that we know you’re both clearly alive and well…. Where the hell is our photo proof?” 

You both share a look, and you quickly mouth, already?  

Eddie shrugs and mouths back, I guess. 

“We lost track of time,” you finally say out loud, still locked in eye contact with Eddie. His brown eyes are surprisingly captivating, several autumn shades all woven together. Burnt orange leaves, red apples, brown sweaters. You never thought you’d be able to see a season in someone’s irises, yet here you were, picturing it clear as day. “Let us hang up and we’ll send the photo.” 

Steve starts to speak, but Eddie’s thumb is quick to end the call. The moment your lock screen stares back at both of you, you look at the time. 

7:41. Shit. 

“Oops,” Eddie whispers as he hands the phone back over, “They really gave us quite the grace period that time.” 

“Yeah,” you breathe out, quickly opening your damn camera app. “So, how do we want to do this one?” 

Eddie thinks for a moment before he launches himself back to his side of the couch, and motions for you to toss him your phone. 

And once again, you put your faith in him, not even hesitating this time. 

It happens naturally; you both mirror each other, drawing up your knees, your sock-clad toes bumping firmly against one another. Your back is supported by the worn arm behind you, similar to how Eddie’s is, as you face him. 

He quickly angles the camera towards you, sticking a hand out into the frame while raising his middle finger. You don’t know what to do, so one hand holds up the Darth Vader as the other mimics flipping him off. 

A soft click from your phone. The photo’s taken, and you’re not even sure if you were smiling. 

“Trade,” he leans forward, one hand holding out your phone, the other reaching out for Darth Vader. 

You oblige, and go through the same process for his photo. His white socks contrast your black ones, and the corners of his lips twitch upwards no matter how hard of a line he presses them into. You can’t look at him directly, and settle for watching him through the screen as you hit the small grey button to snap the photo. 

Just as quickly as he had shoved away from you, he’s back at your side, watching you send off the photos to the group chat with a thumbs up emoji. You take a deep breath, scanning over the pair of photos until it’s confirmed that they’re delivered, and lock your phone. Your brows are furrowed in your reflection staring back at you through the black screen. 

“Do you really want to keep up the miserable act the entire twenty four hours?” Eddie’s voice echoes in your mind. 

No, you don’t. No matter how wrong this levity with Eddie feels, no matter how uncomfortable it is each time you remember that he’s meant to be the enemy and not someone to share laughter and smiles with, you don’t want to waste these remaining twenty hours being miserable. 

“What’s up?” Eddie’s actual voice echoes in real time as you continue to stare at your reflection.

“Just thinking,” you grunt. The thought of admitting your decision to Eddie is much more intimidating than simply acknowledging it to yourself. 

“Dangerous.” 

Instead of quipping something rude back, you decide to be vulnerable with Eddie. You decide to crack yourself open just a small bit, just as he had done microscopically when he spoke of his collection of items. It’s a dangerous gamble, and you don’t give yourself the chance to overthink it. 

“You were right, earlier,” you force the words out, fighting the way they try to cling onto your tongue and remain safely in your throat. 

“About… what?” He looks distrusting, and for good reason. He said plenty of things earlier - you could be preparing to remind him of any number of rude things he’d spewed. 

“About keeping up the miserable act,” you explain, turning your head to him and abandoning the phone, “You were right. I don’t want to be miserable this entire time. It… It goes by faster when we’re not about to strangle each other, believe it or not.” 

You swear you see his shoulders sag in relief. “Well, yeah, I could have told you that. I did tell you that, actually.” 

“Shut up,” you force a scowl, “My point is… I don’t know, maybe, we could try to- try to just- we could be-”

“Civil?” he finishes the sentence you stumble over. 

You nod, “Yeah. We could be civil.”

The word feels foreign on your tongue. Civility was not something you’d ever considered with Eddie, but the last hour had proven it to be possible. 

“Okay,” he nods along with you. He turns his entire body to face you, knees once again bumping as he sticks out a hand for you to shake, “Deal. We will try to be civil the rest of the time.” 

“Civil,” you repeat yourself again, more sure this time, still staring at his offered hand.

An olive branch. The opportunity to work together to survive the next twenty hours. The opportunity for his bare skin against yours. 

You think again of nuclear explosions and pulsing electricity, of open chests and matching scarlets, of smashing glasses against walls and ruined parties, of wounds healing over in scar tissues as they glow a gentle pink.

Civil. You wonder if that’s one of the words they’ll include on your gravestone as you reach out your hand and let Eddie’s palm meet yours. 

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[tasteofpomegranate]

Bagginshield idea:

Thorin succumbs to the gold madness. Bilbo slips out to meet with Gandalf, Thranduil, and Bard. Gives them the Arkenstone and asks how quickly Thranduil could make him a sheer robe of warm colours.

Thranduil's eyebrows levitate to somewhere several feet above his head, but he haughtily says that Elven craftsmen are peerless in their speed and quality. (Also, he may or may not already own such a robe that just needs to be adjusted. Look, he's immortal and immortality is boring.)

The next day, the whole scene with the Thorin talking to Bard and Thranduil and Gandalf shakes down, but when Bilbo does his dramatic "No, it was me. I gave them the Arkenstone" reveal he's wearing this sheer satin robe (that fits his curves sinfully) and what is basically a thong that he wove from flowers like one might make a flower crown.

Thorin just stares at him and after 3 minutes of silence Bard loudly and awkwardly clears his throat and Thorin is just dismissively like "yeah, sure, whatever, it's just gold and gems and those things are worthless compared to his truest treasure"

Thranduil is flabbergasted. Bard is still just sitting there awkwardly. Gandalf has the world's biggest shit eating grin.

[minaturefics]

Though I Know My Heart Would Break

Request: For the poll that Legolas won! You guys sent in a few prompts, I've incorporated: sick (injured, rather) fic, hurt/comfort, everyone lives, and reader confesses first! Hope you guys like it! (Title is from Hozier's Francesca that has me in a chokehold)

Legolas x Reader

Gender-neutral reader

Content warnings: Mild injury (no overly graphic descriptions)

3.7k words

---

You walked through the forest, ducking under the cedar branches, weaving between the cypresses. The air was rich with the scent of herbs — thyme and sage, marjoram and parsley. The late afternoon sun filtered in through the canopy, specking the forest floor with light. Legolas’ footsteps were silent on the soft ground, but the steady clopping of the horse he was leading reassured you of his presence.

With the coronation over, and Eowyn and Faramir wed, attention was turned to restoring Minas Tirith and setting up a settlement at Emyn Arnen. You and Legolas were tasked with surveying the land and forests around Emyn Arnen. Sam was curious about the plants, hearing how new and different they were to those back in The Shire, but Frodo’s reluctance to stray further than the Citadel kept him in Minas Tirith. 

You paused by a cluster of pink rockfoils, thumbing the thin stems before plucking a few small flowers and tucking them into a waxed pouch. 

“Mellon nin,” Legolas said, sounding half-amused, half-exasperated, “Why do you pause and pluck? You have been doing so since we arrived. ”

“They’re for Sam. He might have agreed to stay in Minas Tirith, but I saw the shade of disappointment in his eyes. I thought perhaps I could bring the forest to him instead.”

His lips tugged up at the corners. “And what will you give the forest in return?”

“What do you mean?” You frowned and stood. 

He smiled, soft and knowing, eyes wandering over the barks and branches. “These trees have been left at peace for many years, the bushes and shrubs untouched. They are not used to wandering fingers and restless feet.”

You glanced down at the patch of rockfoils, the decapitated stems looking more brutal in light of Legolas’ words. Your lips twisted and he chuckled, and your eyes drifted back to him.

He had always been so full of light and laughter, even during the endless days and dark nights, even after Gandalf fell, even after the hobbits were taken. Ethereal, that was what people said of the elves. Otherworldly. 

But he looked so human, so normal, standing in a patch of sunlight, laughing at the concerned expression on your face. There were smudges of dirt on his boots, dew dotting the bottom hem of his cloak, and even a small leaf lodged in his hair. 

Yes, Legolas has always just been Legolas to you. 

Perhaps that was why it had been so easy to lose your heart to him. How could you not? While the others regarded him with a deference, or awe in the hobbits’ case, or even confusion at his elf customs, he had never truly seemed so different to you. His eyes, brown and alive in the light, still crinkled at the corners when he smiled. His voice, low and melodious, still cracked when he spoke of sorrows. And his hands, delicate and strong, still bore soft calluses from his bow. 

The last couple of days had been so indulgently wonderful. Without the threat of war or the constant need for secrecy and vigilance, being out in the wilds once more was soothing. It was a great secret joy, of course, that you had Legolas’ undivided attention. 

He had been more loose limbed and free with touches. Hands grazing yours as you walked, his knee against yours while you sat. His eyes too, seemed to melt into an amber by the fire, a tenderness in his gaze. It felt as though the seed of friendship had slowly, slowly, started to grow into something more. 

“Shall we continue on?” He said, and inclined his head towards the distant sound of water. “We can set up camp and leave our things while we walk the forest.”

You nodded and smiled before looking away, eyes scanning the forest floor before they landed on a patch of flowers. They were strange looking, three pronged with large paper-like petals. You knelt by them, carefully cutting the blooms with your knife, and idly said, “It is beautiful here, is it not?”

He hummed in agreement. “I could envisage residing here for a time, should Faramir allow it.”

You glanced at him over your shoulder and chuckled. “You should speak to Sam. Aragorn has already consulted him on some of the gardens in the Citadel, it would not surprise me if Faramir would ask him to Emyn Arnen to design something.”

“Those flowers,” he began, stepping closer and inspecting them, “they are… strange. I do not know what they are, and perhaps it would be better to leave them be.”

“Are they poisonous?”

He leaned in and sniffed them. “No, but as I said before, this forest is unaccustomed to such things. Gifts must be freely given, and what is not must be a fair exchange.”

You dropped them into the pouch and laughed, continuing through the forest. There was a strange note in his voice, something older, wiser, than the Legolas you knew. But what harm could there be in a few cuttings? The forest was vast; a few flowers and leaves here and there would not be any loss at all. “Come now, Legolas, you speak as though —”

A stone caught your toe, your knee buckled, and you fell to the ground. Sharp pain jolted up your wrists and knees, then a hot stinging spread across your palms and shins. You blinked, eyes focusing and unfocusing on the rotting leaves in the dirt, before warm hands rested between your shoulder blades.

“Are you alright?” Legolas said, crouching and easing you back into a sitting position. You stared at him, eyes drifting from his eyes to his lips. Had he always had such beautiful lips? “Mellon nin, are you alright?”

“Yes… I —” The shock of tingling subsided from your hands and legs and only a dull throbbing remained. You looked down at your knee, the same knee that had been shot, and found your trousers ripped and the old wound reopened. It was not as bad as the initial wound, though still relatively deep, and was bleeding sluggishly through the matted dirt. “Oh, I’m… bleeding.”

His eyes darted from your knee to the divot in the ground where a leaf caught in your fall was stained with blood. His lips tightened before he let out a soft sigh. “It is as I said: a fair exchange.” An easy smile spread across his face, the hand on your shoulder loosened its grip, and his voice took on a merry lilt. “However, I do not believe we will have any more trouble on our little trip here.”

The shock of the fall had subsided and you looked at the pouch still clutched in your fist. “Well, I suppose I should make the most of it then, and collect what I can for Sam.”

He laughed, squeezing your shoulder affectionately. “Never one to pass up an opportunity. Come, let us set up camp by the river and have a look at your wound. I do not wish for the matrons at the Houses of Healing tomorrow to claim I have neglected you.”

He pulled you to your feet, and looped an arm around your waist to help you hobble along. His arm was warm, his grip firm but gentle. Pressed up against him you could smell his scent, something fresh like grass or water, unsullied even by a couple of days in the forest. The both of you found a suitable spot under shelter by the trees, and after tying the horse up, he led you to the banks. 

His nimble fingers pried apart the shredded remains of the fabric by your knee and started to wash the wound. He dressed it with some honey from his pack and untouched moss from the forest floor and some spare wrappings you had in your supplies for such an eventuality. 

While he worked, you watched his hands. Long and lithe, they were precise and delicate with their motions. If only you could reach out, and lay your hand on top of his, to sweep your thumb over the back of his knuckles. But your hands were still muddied, and the new closeness you shared with him was too new and too tenuous for something like that. 

Legolas set up camp with a practiced efficiency, and soon the both of you were sitting beside each other by the fire, eating your supplies of bread and cheese. The fire crackled and popped, and around you the forest became alive at night. Owls hooted in the trees, and critters rustled in the bushes, and then, very softly, Legolas began to sing. 

The words were lost on you, but the melody was enough. The notes drifted in the air, curling around you, seeping into your skin. It sounded slow and adoring, leisurely and lazy, and the sensation of lying on sun-warmed grass, your lover’s touch skirting up your arm, filled your body. You leaned back on your arms, sinking into his voice, letting it carry and caress you. 

When the last few words rang in the air, you opened your eyes. Legolas was looking at you with a fond expression, eyes half-lidded and lips in a soft smile. 

“That song,” you whispered, “what is it about?”

His smile widened and he said, “I’ll tell you another time perhaps.”

-

Legolas stood on one of the parapets that overlooked the entrance to the Houses of Healing. Your wound was not healing as well as it should, most likely because of how bad the initial arrow wound was, and you were getting it redressed by the matrons. He sighed and let his eyes wander from the stone flagstones, to the rooftops, to the plains. In truth, the sight of your flesh, angry and inflamed, shook something in him. Even something as minor as your wound, was enough of a risk for infection, for fever. 

Humans were so fragile, so… final. 

He blinked at the thought. Yes, of course, how could he forget? Humans were mortal. Boromir was, Aragorn was. Even the merry little hobbits and Gimli were. How strange to think that such a thing slipped his mind when it came to you, but it was far too easy really. 

There was a vitality that seemed to pour from your being, an almost stubborn resilience, especially in the grim shadow of misfortune. It was the way you would play with the hobbits, even after a long day of walking, or grit your teeth and carry on, even harrowing experience after harrowing experience. When you smiled, the day was better, brighter, and he always found himself trying to get another laugh from you. 

And yet… such a light could be so easily snuffed out. 

He shifted on his feet and watched as you limped from the Houses of Healing. He had intended to go with you, but Sam had wanted to discuss garden plans, and Boromir had gone with you instead. He was about to raise his arm and call out to you, when a figure emerged from behind the line of trees. Boromir walked towards you with outstretched arms and pulled you into his side and helped you along, vanishing from his sight beyond the trees.

Ever since the end of the war, it had felt as though things were shifting between him and you. It was only small, nearly imperceptible changes — softer smiles, more frequent dinners alone, hands that reached and fingers that brushed. And yet… Why did it feel as though you were on the other side of something he could not cross? 

He thought of the cry of the gulls, the perpetual tugging at his heart for the sea. Oh, how he wished he had never heard them. Was this how Arwen felt all the time? Longing, aching. She was happy with Aragron, he knew, but sometimes he would catch her gazing out of a window, eyes forlorn and smile sad. Aragorn knew, understood even, and in those moments he left her to her quiet longing, never hurt or bothered, and welcomed her into his arms when she went back to him. 

But would you understand? Could you accept that there would always be one part of him that belonged to the sea, to the distant shore he would never reach? Or would it be a burden to ask such a thing of you? Maybe you would be better off with someone… mortal. He sighed and wandered back towards the Citadel proper. 

“Boromir, this is unnecessary. Put me down!” Your laughter rang out and you and Boromir emerged onto the courtyard. You were in his arms, limbs flailing as he wrangled to keep you held properly. “Boromir, I — oh, Legolas.”

“Ah, Legolas,” Boromir said as he gently replaced you back on the ground. “I return them to your care.”

He forced a smile onto his face. “How is your leg?”

“Mild infection but nothing to worry about,” you said, hobbling over to him. 

He instinctively reached out and wrapped an arm around your waist. You were warm underneath his hand, warmer than usual, and you smelled strongly of herbal poultice. He could detect traces of burdock and comfrey, and underneath it all, the smell of you. He took a greedy breath, filling his lungs with proof of your life. “You should be resting. Let us go back inside.”

“I’ve been inside the past week. I’m bored to death,” you grumbled. “Let’s sit outside for a while.”

He helped you to one of the stone benches and you collapsed onto it, hissing in pain. You gingerly stretched your leg out and sighed as you settled. He sat next to you, his eyes lingering on your knee. 

“Oh, stop fussing. It’s quite minor, really.”

“I have seen men succumb to infection from unassuming cuts. I do not think I will rest easy until you are fully healed.”

He followed the line of your leg up to your waist, then shoulders, and along your jaw and lips, up to your nose and eyes. Such beauty, destined to fade, to vanish from the world forever. How could he bear it? How could anyone?

“What is on your mind, my friend?” You asked.

“I was just thinking about the fading nature of men. I do not know how your kind bear it.”

“Death?” You chuckled. “But elves can die too, can they not?”

“Yes, but… it is not in our nature. In peace times, it is very rare for our kind to die. For men… even now, where there is no suffering any longer, you still experience the sting of mortality.” His chest constricted. “How can one stand to behold love and light, knowing it will vanish?”

“It is because they do not last, that we relish in them.”

“Even if it will bring you pain later?”

You smiled, gentle and indulgent, and placed your hand on top of his. His shoulders relaxed at your touch, the tension seeping out of his muscles. He wanted to capture the moment, to bottle it somehow, keep the image of you with the sun on your eyelashes and the feeling of the softness of your skin forever preserved. 

“Yes,” you whispered, “even then.”

Something shifted in his heart, just slightly, and a smile crept onto his face. Yes, he thought, especially then. 

-

“Sam,” you said, surveying the small garden. He had done a good job with it — the shrubs were well trimmed and flowers burst in orange and yellow all around. “Are you certain it will look good?”

He nodded and grinned. “It’ll look real pretty with some candles about. I still remember what it looked like in Lothlorien. We don’t ‘ave the sort of fancy holders and the like, but I’ll do my best.”

You smiled and laid a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t know how to thank you for this. I would do it myself but my knee…”

“No thankin’ needed. If anything, I should be thanking you. You brinin’ me those plants and flowers, even when the forest didn’t like you doin’ so.” His eyes fell to your knee. “I’m real sorry it caused you such trouble.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that.” You chuckled and patted him on the back. You looked around the garden again, trying to imagine the candles and cushions that Sam said he’d arrange for the night time picnic you had planned. “Do you think he’ll like it?”

“I think he’ll love it. Mighty romantic, if I can say.”

You shifted on your feet, stomach suddenly lurching. “What if I’m mistaken, Sam? I’m not sure I could bear the embarrassment.”

The last week or so had been so lovely it had felt like a dream. Nearly every night, Legolas had invited you to sit with him at the top of some tower or parapet. He would point and tell you stories of the stars and of the elves that had come before. There were so many instances where he would lean in close, eyes half-lidded, and talk in a low, murmured tone. You would watch his lips, and watch as he watched yours. But then he would draw back and glance away. 

“The elves are funny folk,” he said with a sigh. “I couldn’t tell you what might be goin’ on in Legolas’ mind, but I doubt he would be spendin’ so much time with you if he didn’t have some… reason to do so. If you catch my meaning.”

“I hope so, Sam. Well, I’ll leave you to it. I need to go to the kitchens to see what cheese and fruit they might be able to spare me.”

He gave you an encouraging smile and with a little wave, you set off downstairs. 

The sun was just setting when Sam called you back to the garden to assess what he had prepared. Candles were dotted all around the courtyard, separated on candelabras and clustered in small groups around the picnic blanket. Plush cushions were laid out and there were little white flowers scattered on the soft wool, perfuming the air with the faint smell of jasmine. 

“Sam,” you gasped. “This is — I cannot —”

“I’ll be takin’ your speechlessness as a compliment?” He smiled shyly and ducked his head. He reached for the picnic basket in your hand and placed it on the blanket. “There, now it’s complete.”

“I’ll repay you for this Sam, I promise.”

He blushed. “Like I said before, there’s no need. Anyway, I best be hurryin’ along. Wouldn’t want Legolas to stumble upon me here and get any wrong ideas.”

You laughed and he vanished back inside. You limped over to the blanket, wincing a little as you lowered yourself, and tried to slow your breathing. Legolas would come, wouldn’t he? What if he took one look at the scene and fled? You shook your head. No, he wouldn’t do that. If you were truly mistaken about his feelings towards you, he would tell you gently and bear you no ill will.

“Mellon nin,” Legolas said from behind you and you turned, heart thumping in your chest. His eyes were wide and a slow smile was spreading across his face. “I received your message. Why have you asked me here?”

You swallowed. Did he not know? “Is it… is it not obvious?”

“I have an inkling, perhaps.” He wandered over, his steps lazy and relaxed, and sank onto the cushions. The tightness in your chest eased a fraction. “But I do not wish to presume what may or may not be in your heart. Will you not give me the truth?”

“Legolas, I…” You cleared your throat. By the Valar, why was it so difficult to speak? He arched an eyebrow at you and you glanced away, speaking more to the picnic basket than to him. “I… care for you. A great deal.”

He took your hand, and you dared to lift your gaze. He beamed at you, and then a flash of mischief entered his eyes. “As a friend?”

You scowled at him. “Do you often plan candlelit picnics for your friends, Legolas?”

He laughed and pressed his lips to the back of your hand. They were soft and warm, his breath hot on your skin. “I am teasing, meleth nin.”

Heat crept up your neck and you tried to withdraw your hand. He held fast and planted a line of kisses up, up, up, from your wrist to your elbow to your shoulder. His eyes were almost sparking in the dim, the dots of candlelight flickering in his dark irises. He kissed your jaw and your nose and your temple before dipping his head to capture your lips.

He kissed slow and languid, as though savouring the feeling of you against him. He tasted tart and sweet, no doubt from the berry and honey biscuits you knew he liked to snack on. The strange tension in your stomach snapped and vanished, and you melted under his touch. His growing smile made you giggle and your teeth knocked against his, making him laugh. 

“I am curious about what you have in that picnic basket of yours,” he murmured. “There will be time for such enjoyment later.”

A flush coloured your cheeks. “I suppose it would be a waste if we simply ignored all the food I prepared.”

“Though, before we continue, I must ask you a question first,” he said, growing grave and serious. His eyes drifted down to your joined hands, and he brushed his thumb over your knuckles. “Could you bear being with me, living with me, when part of my heart is forever owned by the sea?”

You reached up and brushed a stray strand of hair behind his ear. “My love, could you bear to be with me? If you stay, you will fade.”

“It would be a worse fate to live eternity without you,” he whispered. “That I could not bear.”

“Legolas…” It seemed all the more tragic that he, of all people, should die. He was light and joy and the thought of him growing cold and dim wrenched at your heart. “You deserve to… I cannot…”

“I have made my choice, meleth nin. Let us be happy together.” He cupped your cheek, a smile spreading across his face. His eyes were soft, but certain, his touch gentle but sure. He kissed the tip of your nose, chuckling, before he slanted his lips against yours. The kiss was chaste and quick, and all the more sweeter for its casualness. 

“For however long we have,” he murmured, “let us be happy.”

“Alright,” you said. You rested your forehead against his, inhaling his scent, breathing his breath. Yours, for now, for ever. “For however long we have.”

---

ok but what is it about the immortality of elves that has me appreciating/relishing/romanticising our mortal lives. i swear this is the second time ive done this with legolas.

Taglist: @sotwk

[live-laugh-legolas]

Omgg I was wondering if you could write how the fellowship would react to getting the silent treatment?

I love prompts like this! Short and simple :)

I can’t imagine giving the silent treatment for anything serious; so this is all based on if you had playful banter and you are being fake petty

The fellowship getting the silent treatment

Aragorn:

-Really?

-He’s kinda annoyed ngl; but in a loving way ya know?

-An eye roll and a shake of the head with a small smirk on his lips

-He’s a patient man and he may play into it a little but doesn’t let it last too long

Legolas:

-I’m indecisive on this one

-Either he doesn’t understand what you are doing and starts following you around like a lost puppy

-And will rush to Aragorn or someone to ask their advice and if you are sick

-Or

-He does it right back

-He can do this forever; he definitely inherited his father’s pettiness

-Immortal beings are patient; he will win this

Gimli:

-Puffed up chest

-He’s stubborn; “Well two can play this game”

-He’s not good at it and breaks pretty quick

-He will sulk off to make you feel bad that you immediately talk to him again because he’s like a sad teddy bear

Boromir:

-He will lecture you for being immature

-But not because he’s being mean

-He is covering for the fact he is upset that you won’t talk to him

-But also may play into it by being overly dramatic

-“what ever shall I do?” While placing his head to his hand and falling to his knees

Frodo:

-He is very playful about it

-“well I guess you don’t want to (I can’t think of anything)” “wait!” “Gotcha”

Sam:

-Don’t even think about giving this sweet boy the silent treatment

-It would break his heart and send him into a spiral trying to figure out what he did

Merry:

-He just shrugs and acts like you aren’t doing it

-He will purposely make decisions that you won’t want just to try and get you to break

-He strikes me as someone who also likes to give the silent treatment

Pippin:

-Doesn’t notice (jk

-He talks enough for the both of you though

-He figures you will get bored of this and talk again soon

Gandalf:

-He doesn’t give two shits

-He rolls his eyes and mutters something under his breath

-And takes a big puff of his pipe because he has a problem

[pinetreesandtea]

WACKEST Crossover? IDK IM BORED BUT-

LOTR Characters playing ✨Minecraft✨

I’m sorry

Frodo

Has built a perfect replica of Bag End

Works together with Sam, Merry and Pippin to recreate the Shire

Very chill, has a pet dog named after Bilbo

Built a perfect replica of the Shire and the path to Bree and Rivendell

The best person to go to for maps

Just for gags, he has a secret dungeon under his Smial. You’d have to go through the pantry and through secret passages. He’s bored

Also has a Nether portal in his dungeon

Special enchanted sword named after Sting

Merry and Pippin have ‘accidentally’ killed him more then 40 times

Boromir accidentally killed him once, he didn’t really care but Boromir apologized profusely (He tapped Frodo to grab his attention and Frodo died bc he had half a heart left)

Frodo likes listening to the In Game music

Prefers to explore and build but doesn’t usually get into combat with mobs (Unless the fellowship drags him into an adventure)

Usually is working on his maps

Terraforms with Sam

Enjoys making noteblock music

On the vc, his mic is very quiet so his voice comes out as a whisper

He usually mutes himself and replies through the game chat

Gamer tag - fFr0d0_Bags

Sam

God at farming

Also is stacked in every food item there is in minecraft

Sam has his own farm with Horses, Llamas and Donkeys

Has a book and quill where he records the Horse’s family Trees

Named all his animals

Built a replica of his smial

Hardcore protector of Frodo

He’s killed Merry and Pippin double the amount of times they’ve killed Frodo

Uses eggs and occasionally snowballs as a weapon

The times that Frodo did die was whenever he wasn’t around

Beat Aragorn to death once

Oddly enough, Iron Golems love him

Usually dies protecting Frodo, falling to death or Eating poisonous potatoes

Bill the Pony has killed him once

Enjoys Terraforming with Frodo

Randomly gives cake, pumpkin pie, and cookies to everyone

Decent mic, polite on vc and is a mod on the minecraft server and discord server

Gamer Tag - S_GamGG

Bill the Pony

It’s a mystery on how exactly Bill is playing

Even Gandalf doesn’t know

It freaks everyone out

His player is a horse somehow

Has killed Sam brutally(he found out Sam named a Donkey after him. Was insulted that he was considered a donkey.)

He’s not on the discord server

Doesn’t type in the chat

Either stares,or nods/shakes head

Gamer Tag - Bill_the_Pony

Merry

Always running around, up to no good

He has the second most deaths in their Server

Likes to test fireworks on Frodo with Pippin

He tried making an underwater base with Pippin, it failed

So now their base is near Bree, a very nice cottage/mansion

Also uses eggs or fireworks as a weapon

Loves going Fishing

Collects flowers

Has four dogs, all named after Legolas, Aragorn, Boromir and Gimli

Gimli accidentally killed Legolas the Dog, Legolas thought he did it on purpose, so he shot down Gimli the dog with an enchanted bow. (Flame III)

Merry was devastated

he held a funeral for Legolas the Dog and Gimli the dog, he forced/guilt tripped everyone in the server to attend the ceremony 

Frodo was the priest 

As revenge, he planned to breed Aragorn the Dog and Boromir the Dog to make Legolas II and Gimli II

Boromir left the game

Aragorn promptly hunted Merry down before he could

he beat Merry to death with a fish, then used his mod powers to strike Merry with lightning. 

Aragorn the dog and Boromir the Dog ended up dying too, as when Aragorn killed Merry, they attacked him and he KO’ed the dogs.

Merry held another funeral for Aragorn the dog and Boromir the Dog 

Spams the crouch to dance/bop

He’s tried to follow Aragorn around (with Pippin of course)

Aragorn somehow knew they were following him, even though they were crouching and shot them dead with a trident

Constantly stealing from Sam’s gardens and farms

Good at building  but actively chooses to use the ugliest materials

Horrible at interior decorating

his mic is ok, it cuts out, sometimes sounds like he’s getting possessed

Gamer tag - MERRY_the_BESt

Pippin 

runs around with Merry

chaotic

Has been killed by everyone in the fellowship except for Legolas

Came up with the idea of testing fireworks on Frodo

has a firework bow

uses fireworks as a weapon

Also loves fishing 

Loves going Mining 

spams the crouch button

always testing mods on his own time 

for the life of him, he can’t build 

Good at redstone

Also likes to make the redstone jukebox songs

Forgets to wear armour 

During the whole ordeal with Merry’s dogs, he was actually exploring and got a bunch of pet cats 

Named all the cats Meowagorn, Meowerlas, Meowmli and Meoworomir

Frodo had to Teleport Pippin to the funeral and back to wherever he was

gets lost when he explores

Frodo has to guide him by looking through his locator maps and points him into the right direction

Pippin has the highest death count in the server

Mostly killed by Frodo, Sam, Aragorn and Gandalf

died from hunger at least 7 times

He acts as a delivery person, basically transports trades across the map 

Kills the wandering trader on sight

He has a pet donkey that he travels with during adventures, named it Treebeard 

Horrible at exterior decorating but is actually pretty decent at interior decorating

his mic is horrible

cuts out, lags, hurts everyones ears

you can hear Pippin’s family in the background (random screams, his mom shouting at his siblings, etc) 

Surprisingly, a mod on the Discord server 

Gamer Tag - Pip1INs

Aragorn

Pro 

a menace in regards to combat

a mod on their server

He’s helped Frodo with the path replica to Rivendell and built his own Rivendell

Keeps an eye on Merry and Pippin

They usually don’t know he’s watching them 

Drags the fellowship into adventure/expeditions

he takes up ‘quests’ given from the fellowship and in return they give him prizes like ores or other valuable items 

They essentially get him to do stuff such as ‘Collect A stack of glow stone for 30 gold’ or something like that

Regularly trades with Everyone

He’s only died twice

He got beaten to death by Sam with a raw fish 

The second death was by Bill the Pony, it was so brutal that Aragorn stared at the ‘You Died’ screen for five minutes straight 

Usually hanging out with Boromir, Legolas, and Gimli

Get’s his weapons + armour from Gimli

Has made a beautiful monument/statue of Arwen 

Its veryyyyyyyyyyyy far tho

He sends letters to Legolas (Delivered by Pippin) in Elvish. But it’s just silly stuff

Always exploring, he buys maps from Frodo

Collects rare items

He’s got stuff from the Nether to the Ocean Monument

Trades with Gandalf in regards of Nether wart, blaze rods, etc

He can usually find Pippin whenever he gets lost exploring

His base is at Rivendell

He also built a secret Ranger base cuz he loves his ranger homies

Has a great sense of direction (from his Ranger skills) and is able to get to everyone else’s bases with Coordinates or maps

Fills out Frodo’s maps for him

As much as I want to say he has a great mic, he doesn’t

He really gives the vibes of having the most crappiest and spotty mic.

“Fr—o- I —— *KSHHH*—- sun——, isn’t that right?”

Frodo: 👁️👄👁️ …. Right.

Despite this, he constantly tries to still use his mic until someone tells him they can’t understand him

Ends up using the chat halfway through

But uses full on sentences with perfect grammar and everything

Gamer Tag - Str1der

Legolas

Rebuilt a new and improved Greenwood

On his father’s throne, there’s a sign in Elvish that says ‘Doodoo head’

He somehow breaks into Aragorn’s base and leaves silly insults written on a book and quills or signs

Such as “you stupid” “u ugly” “doodoohead” “yo mom” “ur musty”

Legolas absolutely loves doing it

Didn’t get Minecraft at first

When I say he was a noob in the first few hours of playing, HE WAS A NOOB NOOB

Aragorn and Pippin had to guide him through

Usually found PvP’ing with Gimli

For the life of him, he cannot keep a pet

It’s like bad luck

No matter how hard he keeps the pet safe, they’re always killed

Merry’s graveyard is filled with his previous pets

Swore to never tame another animal

A god at decorating

Whereas Merry is good at building, Merry is horrible at decor. And so, he helped out with decorating Merry and Pippin’s base (which is how Pippin learned how to decorate)

They cornered Legolas and started to do the Crouch bop and begged for him to help out

Legolas will not admit aloud but he found it endearing

He has a soft spot for the hobbits lmao

However, he has shot both Merry and Pippin with potions arrows

Hasn’t killed them tho

Legolas’s skin was made by your truly, Merry

(NOTE: I made this back in likeeee 2021 (?), wrote a huge chunk after this line, forgot to press save, only had it up to here, and I had to just put my phone down. The frustration I felt 😭 Buuut it’s been sitting in my drafts for literally years cuz I was THAT frustrated and had no motivation to try and remember/rewrite what I lost. Was just checking out my drafts and remembered I haven’t finished it. So, Voilà.)

Enjoys annoying Gimli IMMENSELY

Is absolutely helpless when it comes to mining and the Nether. Most of his deaths come from either mining (Falling from tall heights, suffocating from gravel, falling in lava) and the Nether (Again, falling in Lava, trying to kill Pigmen, trying to sleep in the Nether)

As expected, absolute god at archery

Great at parkour and makes parkour in Greenwood

Once the group defeated the Ender dragon, he was the first to use Elytra and LOVES it

Has a good mic but usually forgets to mute himself

Also writes in full sentences, proper grammar and fancy words in chat

Gamer Tag - LEG0_LAS

Gimli

Obviously he’s the miner friend

He’s a proud dwarf, so of course he’s gonna do what his people do best

Rebuilt Erebor/The Lonely Mountain, the Glittering caves/the White Mountains, and The Misty Mountains

Like he really went crazy with the builds

But it was all because he had too much blocks

Makes extremely complicated and vast mines

Even Aragorn gets turned around

They all somehow connect and Merry n’ Pippin get lost every time they try to explore his mines

He has to go retrieve them every time

In the end, he made some rails that directly connect everyone’s bases so that no one (the hobbits) gets lost

An absolute demon at Redstone

Secret doors, bases, and passages

He has A LOT of resources

Collects everything that he mines even if it’s Andesite

He made the Lonely Mountain as a base for all the materials

Literally chests upon chest filled with resources

Trades with the fellowship

The hobbits trade any enchanted books or food for building supplies

Aragorn and Boromir trade meats, wood, and dye for armour and tools

Gandalf trades enchanted books, potions, and exotic stuff he finds for potion materials (lapis, redstone, glowstone, gold, spider eye, coal, etc.) and a place to stay lmao

At the beginning, both Legolas and Gimli refused to trade with each other

Begrudgingly, Legolas began to trade other types of wood and rare items or loot like a Trident for building materials, nether materials and ores once he realized that he was hopeless with mining and the Nether

Enemies to BFFS fr

They do lots of competitions and prank wars

Dabbles in enchantment, makes high quality armour and weapons

Uses an axe for combat

Repairs any abandoned mineshafts he finds

Best builder in the fellowship

Everyone has to spam the chat in order for him to go to sleep for a quick sec

the only times he isn’t underground is when there’s a raid at one of Boromirs villages, trading with the fellowship (and even then, he’ll just send Pip to deliver it or send it in a minecart chest) or group events/quests

Otherwise, he won’t be seen for DAYS

Brings the whole squad down into the Deep Dark to fight the Warden

Has an ok mic, usually fine but occasionally cuts out

Writes in shortened words in the chat

Ur, K, gtg, brb, r, cya

It annoys Gandalf and Legolas

Gamer Tag - G1ml1_Son0f_Glo1n

Boromir

He’s the type to find villages, fix it up and improve it

Turned an Abandoned zombie village into Minas Tirith and healed the zombie villagers

He’s decent at building but not the best with creative builds

Basically only good at building Gondorian architecture and medieval style architecture

Claimed a huge chunk of land that nobody was using and named it Gondor

He looks after numerous villages and maintains them

But likes to visit everyone, tours Gimli’s mines, tries out Legolas’s parkour in Greenwood, stays at Rivendell and helps out Aragorn with whatever he’s doing, and ‘vacations’ at the Shire

(Merry and Pippin mainly drag him into whatever shenanigans they’re up to)

A duo with Aragorn when it comes to adventures

Exploring the Nether, bastions, jungle temples, desert temples, ocean monuments, the deep dark, and the End.

Amazing at combat and PVP

Uses a shield, sword, and occasionally a crossbow

Also has a soft spot for the hobbits

Merry and Pippin definitely exploit the crouch bopping to convince him

He was the one that found Frodo’s secret dungeon underneath his smial

Was secretly a bit freaked out and never said a word until everyone else found out

“Why didn’t you tell anyone?” “I’m afraid Frodo might’ve sacrificed me or something along those lines”

Is constantly gifted flowers by the hobbits

He has no idea what to do with him but felt like he couldn’t refuse when even Frodo and Sam gave him flowers

might think its a bit stupid at first and Completely oblivious to the fact that hobbits like to communicate through the language of flowers

Is secretly flattered tho

Once it got boring when nothings really happened with his villages (he of course already expanded them and built fortifications like walls) he ended up claiming another chunk of unused land and recreated Rohan

He loves Rohan so he couldn’t help himself

Got into horse breeding he was finishing up Edoras

Named his best horse after Faramir

Made roads connecting everyone’s builds and bases

When he finished, that’s when he realized that Gimli already did that but underground

Boromir, exhausted and sounding defeated: “why didn’t you tell me before I started this project?”

Gimli: “how was I supposed to know! I thought you knew the railways were all connected to every base”

Decent mic, you can hear him grumbling in the background as he’s doing whatever

Idk why but he seems to be the type of guy to sneeze like a dad

Temporarily deafens everyone’s ears when he sneezes with his mic on

Doesn’t use the chat

Gamer Tag - B0r0m1r

Gandalf

To be honest, I don’t really see him playing

If he did, it would be on rare occasions and make surprise appearances

Does not have a base

Instead he’ll randomly crash at other people’s bases

The hobbits, Gimli and Aragorn don’t mind

Legolas and Boromir are like 🤨

Collects enchantments and makes looooots of potions

Also makes a ton of potions

Hasn’t died yet

Travels in the Nether like he’s enjoying a stroll in a park

Supplies Merry and Pippin with fireworks

Explores A LOT

Doesn’t really bother with building

Likes to enjoy some good scenery while listening to the peaceful in game music of Minecraft

Has collected all the music discs

He creates a lot of traps/pranks and chuckles to himself as he goes off to find another spot to lay a trap

Because he isn’t on the server often, everyone won’t even think it’s him

Merry and Pippin will often get blamed for Gandalf’s traps and it started a war

As everyone’s fighting it out, Gandalf is watching with a small smile on his face

Doesn’t use a mic

writes the same as Legolas and Aragorn (full sentences, proper grammar and fancy words), but also rhymes his words for fun

Gamer Tag - Gandal_The_Grey

[anghraine]

I was just wondering with all the weirdness about Númenorian pregnancy and childhood how you think Denethor fits with this. Do you think he was considered a strange child? Was he especially ‘difficult’ for his parents? How does this in turn relate to Faramir?

Oh, interesting!

One of the finer points of the bizarre Elvish/peredhel/Númenórean pregnancies is that much of the difficulty derives from the nature of the child or children, rather than just being a characteristic of the parents. The idea is that there's something so remarkable about these people that biologically producing them involves significant physical and (especially) spiritual strain for both parents, though more for the mother.

(Thus, Fëanor drained Míriel's spirit more than Finwë's, while with Arwen in NOME, the emphasis is on the strain her power and uniqueness put on Celebrían despite Celebrían's relative youth. Even Melian bore the chief strain of producing Lúthien and was apparently like "never again, this is Too Much Materiality and Gender.")

So the logic is that the direct transmission of the parents' special qualities to the child(ren) is itself difficult, and in addition, the more exceptional the child, the greater the difficulty and impact of creating them on the biological parents.

And there are repeated suggestions that among Elves, peredhil, and on Númenor, this variable but always-present spiritual cost of producing such beings is so much a fact of life that they have established cultural institutions for accommodating the higher difficulty of reproduction among their peoples.

(Tangentially, I wonder about how relatively low reproduction rates coupled with extremely low child mortality rates would operate culturally on Númenor itself ... like, are there orphanages? Is there a need for them when disease and even injury are so rare, lifespans so long, medicine so sophisticated, and children so valuable?)

But anyway, Denethor! The point of all this is that I suspect this variable spiritual/physical strain on the parents, beyond the natural strain of childbirth, would have somewhat diminished by the late Third Age. But it's pretty clear from LOTR that there are still distinctive qualities being consistently transmitted to Númenórean children from their parents, and thus the strain of Númenórean reproduction would still occur.

We know, for instance, that Denethor showing signs of old age in his 60s struck Gandalf as alarming for any Gondorian Dúnadan, though particularly one from Denethor's family. But it would be unusual anyway; it's not just that Denethor is uniquely strange, though he's certainly exceptional (Gandalf: "He is not as other men of this time" / Appendices: "a proud man, tall, valiant, and more kingly than any man that had appeared in Gondor for many lives of men").

Tolkien also explains Gandalf's "whatever be his descent from father to son" remark about Denethor as indicating that Gandalf doesn't know the particulars of the Stewards' genealogy but he can tell they're Elrosian. Imrahil's Númenórean-Silvan ancestry is also extremely visible to Legolas, who similarly doesn't know their family history but can see the sort of imprint of it on Imrahil (and now I'm thinking about Legolas's struggle with sea-longing, his rapport with the distinctly Elvish Imrahil, and Imrahil's sister longing for the sea...).

Okay, Elizabeth, focus. The point of all this is that you'd expect a certain difficulty with the gestation and delivery of ANY Gondorian Dúnadan even this late, and we continue to see the characteristic small families and general signs of Númenórean low fertility/low mortality. But Denethor is a markedly unusual child even by these standards. And he's implied to be the third of either three or four children, but is pretty clearly the only one who is that weird in his family, and possibly in the entire country, when he's young.

(The potential fourth child, a younger brother, is so comprehensively out of the picture by the WOTR that I suspect he was retconned out, but theoretically he could have been killed in battle without having children, or might be ineligible for war and inheritance for some other reason. To me it makes the most sense that he was retconned out, leaving Denethor as "the baby," but sometimes I imagine the younger brother does exist, and has a disability that keeps him out of both war and the succession according to the practices of Númenórean elites. I could believe that Gondorians would suspect that something "went wrong" with Denethor's brother specifically because Denethor is so exceptional, etc.)

I think Denethor being, in Tolkien's phrase, "almost purely Númenórean" would ensure that he seems normal by the standards of Gondorian Dúnedain at birth, but soon would head into full uncanny valley Númenórean child vibes (per NOME). On Númenor, there's a cultural expectation of children just being like that, but I suspect it would not be normal at this point, at least not to nearly so great a degree. And since Denethor is the third child, the contrast with the two older ones would make it all the clearer that something different is going on with him.

For all of Gondor's records, I suspect there's a lot about ye olde Númenóreans that has simply been lost by this point. I imagine Denethor became ultra-learned in lore both for its own sake, and to understand his own experience of the world, which would only diverge more and more markedly from other people's as he grew older. There's a lot of knowledge that simply has never been recovered and he would have had to figure much of it out by sheer strength of will.

I imagine that Denethor's parents, older sisters, and caretakers did love him, but he was strange and off-putting, and they couldn't give him ... it feels very therapy-speak-ish to say "scaffolding." But there used to be a common framework for understanding the development of Númenórean children as they once were that has largely dissolved. I think the people around young Denethor did their best, but it wasn't enough for anyone concerned.

It's come up a few times on my blog that when it comes to the "powers of mind" type of Númenórean abilities, it's a bit difficult to compare Aragorn with Denethor and Faramir, because Aragorn is so much subtler and more adaptable. He can turn the eldritch strangeness off and pass unnoticed when he wants to. Denethor and Faramir's own eldritch strangeness may not be as "remote," but with them it seems like it's always on and there's no missing them or their capabilities when they're present.

Maybe this just has to do with the particular abilities they favor, the bleedover of temperament and nature, etc. But it's also possible that part of the unobtrusiveness of Aragorn when he wants to be vs Denethor and Faramir's neon "Númenórean" sign blinking at all times is that Denethor and Faramir weren't raised by Elrond amidst a community of Elves who would be familiar with both a long line of Elrosian Númenórean children and with the oddities (and even cultural protocols) that Númenóreans mostly share with Elves in the first place, even if the pace is different.

But Denethor and Faramir have never been normal in their context. There was no Elrond for them. And while young Faramir at least had Denethor himself to instruct him and perhaps even model Númenóreanness for him, however fraught that instruction may have been, it's possible that Denethor didn't really have anyone at all.

(The fact that Denethor married late and specifically married and dearly loved the Elvish-coded sister of notable Weird Cool Guy Imrahil seems perhaps significant.)

I think that while Denethor values his own abilities and is very proud of who and what he is, this experience of the world would have been incredibly isolating even amidst the oddities of Gondorian Dúnedain in general. I suspect Gandalf is actually spot-on when he says that Denethor loved Boromir all the more because Boromir was unlike him. I also suspect it would be clear quite early, especially to Denethor and Finduilas themselves, that Boromir was very different—the "strain" would have been fairly light.

(Boromir is distinguished not only from the high-octane Númenóreanness of Denethor and Faramir and even Imrahil, but from Gondorian cultural norms in general. He is a Dúnadan without question, but as a "type" he has more in common with the Rohirrim and seems to have an especially strong rapport with them.)

I also suspect that if Faramir had been born first, he might well have been an only child. As it is, the actual process of his gestation and birth was likely an ordeal for Denethor and Finduilas to begin with, even if her physical health was not in question at the time (which I actually presume, given that she lived for five more years and her early death is in no way attributed to Faramir ever). But Denethor would have known from early on that Faramir is special in the way that he himself is special, that the weird isolating experience he's had, that it was such a relief to see Boromir spared from, will happen to Faramir. And I'm guessing they also would have understood that Faramir being so exceptional ensured there would be no other children.

Sometimes I wonder if Denethor's knowledge of the experience Faramir was facing actually contributed to their fraught relationship. He could be about as normal a parental figure to Boromir as the ruler of a desperate nation could ever be to his heir. He could have something that looked like the lives of other people in that specific context. But his relationship with Faramir was never going to be normal, could never be.

There was probably a really peculiar period for Boromir and Faramir as brothers when Boromir was maturing normally while Faramir was the weird kid absorbing information from lore, from Denethor, from true-dreams, from other people's minds. I can even imagine that the young Boromir's role as "protector" of Faramir was not just his powerful elder sibling energy but related to child Faramir being genuinely strange. But by this time there would at least be a framework for understanding Faramir's development and more bizarre qualities—he's like Denethor, oh, okay. Any way that he's not like Denethor could probably be attributed to Finduilas's own peculiarities.

The tension between Denethor and Faramir is so profoundly shaped by their commonalities despite their somewhat different philosophical conclusions etc that it's difficult not to see that as a factor. They love each other and resent each other and see through each other in some ways but not the basic fact of their mutual love. Denethor is anxious about Gandalf stealing Faramir's love and loyalty from him while Faramir likes Gandalf but presents his influence as distinctly minor and calls for Denethor as he's dying, etc. They're two of the most Númenórean people alive and their perspectives on Númenor, Gondor, the war, their political situation in general are extremely shaped by it.

But I kind of wonder if Denethor also saw a bit of Thorongil in Faramir—someone akin to him, with such strikingly similar abilities and appearance, who even thinks similarly to him in many ways, but whose circumstances ensure he's always had a context and framework for understanding why he's so different and guidance in handling it. Yes, it's Denethor's choice to provide that guidance, but still, it does mean that Faramir is never quite as isolated as the young Denethor likely was.

To us it can seem obvious that Ecthelion's favoritism of Thorongil above even Denethor is unconsciously replicated by Denethor with his own sons (with Boromir as "the Thorongil" and Faramir as "the Denethor" to Denethor's Ecthelion). But I suspect it looks very different to Denethor.