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#HOLLAND WHAT WERE YOU THINKING-
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low effort offspring meme incoming
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idk why but the “what your favorite band says about you” videos never include the offspring even if they include other punk bands like blink-182 or sum 41 or bad religion
anyways this isnt my best work but i did do this on my phone because i was too lazy to get my computer out
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thevalleyisjolly · 2 years
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Society if instead of tying MCU Spider-Man to the Avengers, they had him connect with the Defenders instead.
#the valley is posting#the biggest disservice they did to holland!spidey imo#and you can tell that the individual movies tried so hard to break him away from the legacy of the a v e n g e r s#except the group movies kept sucking him back in until there was no way to ease up on those relationships without destroying all continuity#but. what if. hear me out. friendly NEIGHBOURHOOD spidey got to network with other new york vigilantes instead.#you can still have spidey questioning his own identity and motives! and it'll mean more because it's actually against comparable heroes!#what makes spidey different from dd? from jessica or cage or danny?#it becomes so much more meaningful for spidey to explore and define himself against people with similar experiences and situations#than trying to measure up against the legacy of big supers whom he has very little in common with and the power imbalance is so huge#anyways i have very little stakes in this but you'll never convince me that tying spidey to the a v e n g e r s was a good narrative choice#i'm not saying you can't be a fan of the relationships spidey formed within the a v e n g e r s#i just think it was a poor decision driven solely by capitalism and corporate greed to introduce spidey in that way at all#yeah; it's happened now; and there's nothing wrong with enjoying spidey's relationships with other heroes#i just wish it hadn't happened in the first place and we got to see spidey movies that were actually about spidey#instead of; y'know; spidey AND the a v e n g e r s
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maddy-ferguson · 11 months
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The way noah os given first 3 scripts to get ready for what its coming and that means he could get vecna'd or some shit like that which means we will have to see him like that in that terrible wig and clothes :S. This is so bad i just cannot believe tmhe wasnt given a proper hair style and clothes. The ga is right in shaming the wig i am afraid bc i cannot deal with those serious scenes while noah is looking like that. #shallowreasons
😭😭😭😭
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agirlwithglam · 6 months
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conversation tips + how to be funny
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talk about the other person. i know, this is said basically everywhere so im not gonna go too deep into it. everybody likes talking about themselves, where they've been, experiences they've had, etc. so just keep asking questions about themselves!
another thing id like to mention is don't just let them talk the whole time, thats not how a conversation works. instead add in your own opinions, and experiences! make them laugh!
literally just find out things about the other person- linking back to the first point- be genuinely curious about the other person. be curious about them! how they think, how they are, find out stuff about them that you can use later- ex: if they mention they like star neckless, maybe one day you can buy a star neckless for them to show that you care!
absurd analogies.
share funny & embarrassing stories from your past! this makes you look more confident and people feel more comfortable around you bc you're able to laugh about a cringe moment in your past. but its best to do this when the laugh is at your expense, and not at others.
make people feel good about themselves. make them feel special.
watch how other people do it. take inspo from others! you can even look at celebrities interviews and see how they've made people laugh and have an interesting conversation. some rly good interviews that i'd recommend are: ryan gosling / the tv show percy jackson / Zendaya & Tom Holland /
finish other people's sentences with something funny and ridiculous. when someone's trying to remember what they were about to say, you can fill in with a ridiculously funny idea to end their sentence! dont overuse this tho, otherwise it can get pretty annoying.
EXPRESSIONNNN!!!! laugh at their jokes, nod along, be sympathetic. just express and overreact in a way that makes them feel heard and special!!
playful teasing.
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doromoni · 22 days
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Not Over the Papaya | OP81
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⊹ 。•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
Ships : Oscar Piastri x Popstar! Reader , Ex!Lando Norris x Popstar! Reader
Genre : Fluff Smau
A/N : Here ya go peeps 🧡
Face claim : Jennie Kim
Warnings : Cursing, Grammatical Errors
Song : Love is Weird - Julia Michaels
Summary : Y/N and Oscar cope with their own breakups by making the Heartbreak Club.
Masterlist | Series Masterlist
< Previous | Part 10 | Next >
*your message was sent successfully
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Notification: you received a message from Charles
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Y/N. close friends 4mins
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*replies are disabled
*Incoming call from Y/bf
Pick up or Decline
Pick up
“Hi”
“Did you get to sleep at all yesterday?”
“A little bit.”
“Oh honey, I wished I was there with you”
“I wish you were here too Y/bf.”
“At least try to have power naps today alright?”
“Ok”
“Do you want some good news?”
“hmm, sure”
“your EP is in number 1”
“Yeah… yey”
“Y/N…. I’m really sorry for what’s happening. Neither you nor Osc deserves this”
“I know… hey Y/bf, I kinda tired. Call you later? ”
“Okay.”
call ended
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*your message was sent successfully
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mclaren
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liked by user1, user2 and others
mclaren Lan 🤝 Osc . United and ready for Quali!
Ln4 LETS GO!!
user1 I could sense a PR cover up when I see one 🙂
user2 Admins are really trying to cover up what Lando did yesterday…
user3 Ok let’s all pretend that they dont want to kill each other
user4 Oscar is acting the shit out of that smile.
user5 I’m sorry Mclaren, I love you… but covering up what Lando did is just a no no
user6 United? really??
user7 Can’t hear you… Until ur Dead EP is playing on Max volume
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*Calling Osc 🧡
*Ringing
*Ringing
*Ringing
*The number you have dialed cannot be reach, please try again later
*Would you like to leave a voicemail?
“Good luck with Quali, Luv.”
“I love you Osc”
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*incoming call from Osc🧡
Pick up or Decline
Pick up
“Oscar! I’m so glad you called…”
“I’m sorry for not coming back to our room sooner. I just needed time to think alone. “
“I won’t lie Osc, you scared me shitless. but I completely understand. I- uhm … uh. Did you get my voicemails? ”
“ Yes… but I didn’t open it, I’m sorry. I wanted to talk to you in person … about everything, about us— I- haven’t opened any of my socials because i wanted to hear from you first.
“Oh… thats probably the smartest thing to do. Osc I’m really sorry for dragging you into this.”
“I know you are Y/N. I uhm — I really need to know something right now. It’s driving me crazy”
“Yes of course. whatever you like Osc. ”
“Was the photo real?”
“Yes. but it was from years before”
“Do you still love him?”
“No. I don’t love Lando. Not anymore”
“Y/N… I-. Look I love you so much Y/N and I love what we have right now.”
“Oscar… You’re scaring me.”
“I don’t think I can do this anymore”
Series Taglist : @champagneproblems17 @itsjustfranzi @cheriwritesig @forza-charles @awritingtree @sltwins @gr1mes-cc @hwalllllllelujah @btsfluffsworld @tillyt04 @landotd @booksandflowrs @czennieszn @thatsouthernblondewiththeass @tellybearryyyy @wobblymug @alittlechaotics-blog @bingussthirdtoe @mirrorball-6 @demandealalune @heartsforleclerc @yoongi-holland @maneskin-slave @alenix @forensicheart @bloodyymaryyy @stereading @hahahjej @youre-on-your-ownkid : closed
Maintaglist : @myescapefromthislife @peterholland04 @charlottef1 @fangirl125reader @mel164 @gnarlycore @chloelovesln4 @vickykazuya @merchelsea @ln4author @qzmef @nxk1309 @styl1shl1v @lottalove4evelyn @gr3yhues : closed for now
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yandere-writer-momo · 8 months
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Yandere Head Canons:
Predator and Prey
Yandere Various Beastmen/ women x Human Afab Reader
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You live in a world ruled by beast men where you are the lowest on the food chain. Sadly for you, you’re often treated like a play thing by your coworkers…
Tw: Breeding, lesbian sex, smut, mounting, predator/ prey dynamics, Yandere behavior, etc
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Leveret- Holland Lop
Leveret was your sweet childhood friend and loyal companion! He was incredibly shy to the point you’d always have to stand up for him. He has always looked up to you ever since you were kids… you were his hero!
Leveret is your standard pretty boy. Hyper feminine and lean, he often wears pastels. His fawn colored hair is usually a bit long and very fluffy, just like his floppy ears! Leveret is very cute but equally pathetic. He never stands up for you, but you’re never upset with him since he is a rabbit. What could prey do to a predator other than run away? It made his heart soar that you were never upset with him… Leveret wouldn’t be able to live with himself if you hated him!
Leveret went to work in the office with you so the two of you are together forever (just like you promised as kids). He doesn’t want to lose sight of his shining star!
Leveret love when you scratch his ears. He automatically thumps his foot which makes him embarrassed so you often reassure him. Leveret loves how sweet you are to him.
Leveret secretly idolizes you and has an entire shrine dedicated to you. He’s a pathetic man. He’s too scared to confess his overwhelming feelings so he settles for collecting keepsakes from you. Nothing you’d ever miss of course, but they meant the world to him!
Chapsticks, silverware, panties, it didn’t matter! It was all kept in a box under his bed for him to romance through when he felt especially pathetic.
Leveret often huffed and humped your soiled panties like the pathetic loser he was! He’d be over the moon if you saw him like this… if you told him how pathetic he was. It was his deepest fantasy! To be dominated by you! To have his small, pathetic cock inside of you. He’s a bunny so he could go for hours! Whatever you want…
Leveret often stalks you when you’re not around him and it turns him on to see you taken advantage by the other beast men, especially Amara.
He often wishes he was a predator so he could be more dominant and confident but he’s okay being a prey instead. You’re never suspicious of him this way… so it’s much easier for you to let your guard down around him
Amara- Spotted Hyena
Amara has a dirty blonde and black spotted wolf cut and scars from one side of her cheek to the other. Her whole body is covered in scars from her constantly picking fights.
Amara is a bully. She’s the meanest coworker to you just because of your species (human).
She often slams her shoulder into yours, knocks your papers out of your hands, or spills food/ drinks on your clothes. Luckily her bullying is only physically since the entire office dislikes her. Arielle is especially not fond of Amara.
You often see the African lion and spotted hyena get into spats
Her loud cackles always fills the office which raised the concerns of your coworkers. Arielle is often the one to come to your rescue. Which only makes Amara more agitated
Yet despite her cruelty to you, you’re not mean to her since you understand why she is the way she is. She had a hard home life since she was the youngest in her pack so you knew she was trying to seek power elsewhere
It’s when Amara hears you defend her to Arielle that the bullying begins to stop. “I know it’s just Amara’s nature and if it makes her feel like the leader then she’s fine picking on me. I’m just a human anyways, it’s not like I could ever defend myself.” You understood her instincts? Amara didn’t think a human would understand her more than other beast men would… it started her interest in you.
Amara will stop being physically mean to you since you’ve shown submission to her. Now she will share her lunch with you in an, albeit, forceful way. She will scare off your bunny beast man friend so she can sit with you in the break room instead. The hyena insistent that you needed more protein or you’d be too weak.
Amara is insistent on walking you home. Her hyenas ears flip back and forth on her head to listen to any danger. Her scarred and muscular form was enough to intimidate anyone away from you. Not to mention her 5’11” frame. She was definitely a predator not to be messed with.
Amara will become suffocatingly clingy to the point your boss has to separate the two of you in fear of your safety (and a lawsuit). But that doesn’t stop her from finding you during break time (and to rip you away from Leveret)
Be prepared for the spotted hyena to corner you in the bathroom, her hands grabbing you in every place she can reach as her nose is buried in the crook of your shoulder. How could she not votive how good you smell?!
It isn’t long before she has you bend over the sink, her pseudo penis pressed against your backside as she humps you. She may not be a male, but her organ is perfectly functional for mounting. Won’t you indulge her? Amara hasn’t mounted anyone yet and you said you understood her nature. So won’t you indulge her? It’s not like you could defend yourself, you said so yourself…
Amara may be a woman but she was sure she could please you just as much as a man! The two of you could be mates!
Amara is quite rough and her psuedo penis is quite big. She’s a true dom and has a biting kink. It’s best to avoid being alone with her… unless you enjoy being mounted
Arielle- African Lion
Arielle is a respectable figure in the office. Her ginger hair is usually kept in a pixie cut. She’s a handsome woman with a scar across the right side of her lip. She’s usually the best dressed in the office. She often has to shave her face and arms since she’s a trans woman. Arielle hates her mane that constantly tries to grow back and the excessive body hair (but she’d be over the moon if you tell her you like her hairy arms, she’ll keep them then),
Arielle was the first in the office to take you under her wing and to protect you from the others. She isn’t very fond of the way the others treat you. You’re a rare human! You should be respected…
Arielle often carries extra set of clothes on her so you have something to change into when Amara decides to make you wear a meal or beverage. As much as Arielle hates Amara, it satiates a part of her that adores you in her clothes. Something about it is sexy to her. Especially from how much smaller you are than her.
If you seek her out for help or guidance, you’re instantly in her good graces. You feel safe around her? She’ll keep you safe. You like her clothes? She’ll bring you more. You like her hairy arms? She won’t shave them anymore. You think she’s a beautiful woman? She’ll show you how beautiful she finds you.
Arielle is the most passionate amongst the beast men. She loves to trail kisses across your neck and chest. Her clawed hands are always gentle so she doesn’t hurt you. She’s so happy you don’t mind her genitalia. It makes her cry and purr to be accepted.
Arielle is a little sucker for praise of any kind. She’s quite a lax lover but don’t let that fool you. Arielle is quite protective of you and is willing to shed blood for you if she has to.
Arielle doesn’t mind sharing you with Eden but she’s not fond of the other workers. She especially dislikes Amara and Leveret.
She scents you more than the other beast men. You often find lion hair all over your clothes after a night with her…
Conan- Eastern Wolf
Conan hates humans so he avoids you like the plague. If you try to talk to the gray haired man, he will leave the premises.
Conan is a very attractive man with long gray hair and icy blue eyes. He’s usually quite stoic and quiet so no one ever knows what he’s feeling if they look at his face… his tail tells a different story.
Conan will eventually open up to you when he sees how hard you try to understand the beast men’s behaviors. You’re not a bad human like the others he met and it was rude of him to make such an assumption.
Conan will apologize to you but he still keeps you at arms length, until he notices a certain rabbit being odd. Hell, everyone was odd to you. And Conan didn’t like it.
Conan will offer you solace if the others start to be too much. He’s a bit higher up in the office so you can hide in his office to get away from the stage five clingers but it won’t be long until they find you.
Conan is great at giving advice and he is a great listener. He just never expected to grow fond of you as well… you were too nice for your own good.
Conan refers to you as little red riding hood. “Little red, don’t you think you should avoid someone like me?” And you’d always smile at him. “I think you’re nice though, Conan. You have such kind eyes… I’m happy you became my friend.”
Curse you. Curse you and your kindness. Your gentle scratched behind his ears and your soft words that made his tail wag. Conan began to crave you more and more until all he wanted to do was to breed you like a proper mate should.
Conan will try to stay away from you when he’s in heat by locking himself up in his office. If you choose to ignore the “do not disturb” note on his door because the others are scaring you, he cannot guarantee he won’t pounce on you.
Conan would apologize the entire time as he stuffs you with his knot. But this was your fault. You should know not to get too close to a predator. Didn’t your family ever warn you about the big bad wolf, little red?
Eden- Grizzly Bear
This giant woman was in love with you at first sight. You’re so small compared to her and that meant you needed to be protected!
Eden is the tallest amongst the other people in the office. She’s built like a powerlifter with strong arms and a strong back but has a tummy on her. Her hair is in a chocolate brown mullet and she’s covered in tattoos. She is also openly lesbian.
Outside of work, Eden wears flannels and resides in a cabin in the woods. She enjoys hikes and wood cutting. You jokingly call her a lumberjack.
She loves to talk. Eden is the office chatter box with a gregarious personality. She’s quite boisterous but she’s not a bad person. Eden is thrilled that you don’t mind her incessant chatter, you’re one of the few people…
This giant woman often greets you with a toothy grin and shoves Amara away from you. She’s one of the few people in the office that likes humans. 
Eden will share all her snacks with you from the get go and she will be so happy if you share yours! Sharing is caring after all!
Eden loves honey straws that are supposed to be used for tea. She sucks on them like suckers any chance she gets. You often stress concern for her and her love of sweets but not to worry! She’s a grizzly bear! She will be perfectly okay!
She may seem like an idiot but she’s far from it. She notices the way Amara changes her beat around you in a second. And she doesn’t like it. If you build a strong bond with Eden, Eden will go to the bathroom with you and she will pull Amara off you. A bear is not to be messed with, especially not a grizzly.
Now you have this tank of a woman following you around work. Eden offering you snacks and protection in exchange for you talking with her. She’s a lax Yandere save for her over protectiveness.
Eden will take you on hikes and foraging in the woods. She will even teach you which berries and mushrooms are edible! Whatever you want, she will be happy to oblige.
Eden is perfectly okay with just being friends too. She doesn’t mind! Eden just likes being around you. But if you want more with her or if you want a third, she’s open.
Eden is a very giving lover. You will be her cute little princess pillow almost every time. She’d rather do all the work so the two of you can cuddle and watch movies but won’t reject you if you want to go down on her. She gets especially riled up if you offer to suck her strap. How naughty
Eden wouldn’t mind sharing with her best friend, Arielle. She finds it kind of hot to have you crying and moaning under her and the lioness. She’s kind of jealous that Arielle would be able to get you pregnant while she can’t, but she’s still happy to stuff your cute pussy with her strap or her fingers. You’re so fucking cute. Won’t you stay with her forever?
The two (or three) of you could live a pretty efficient life in the woods. So why don’t you just stay here where she can properly protect you?
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softspiderling · 5 months
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illicit affairs - part one | r.c.
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summary:
“I’ll be upstairs with Monique, a’ight?” he said, muttering in your ear. “Are you okay getting the drinks to the boys?”
“Yeah yeah,” you huffed with a wave. “Go on. Be safe.”
Rafe smirked at you, ignoring how Monique was staring daggers at you. “Come get me if anything’s wrong, you hear me precious?”
OR; Topper gets duped by a pretty “bartender”, Rafe (almost) has another hook up, and you're trying to tell yourself that this is enough.
pairing: rafe cameron x reader
warnings: mention of drugs and alcohol (weed!), this chapter has no smut, but the later parts will so 18+ MDNI!
word count: 2,5k
author's note: wait... is this finally the first chapter of illicit affairs?🤭 yes it is!!! ik i've been teasing it for so long but it's finally hereee!!! inspired by my own tom holland fic (don't talk to me pls) and it has evolved into a series... i hope you love it so much!!!
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
part one: "don't call me kid"
Women and men can’t be “just friends”.
You had always hated that saying. Like, why the hell couldn’t men and women be friends? All three of your best friends were guys, and you didn’t even remotely want to be anything more than friends with any of them.
Okay, maybe you wouldn’t mind being more than friends with one of them.
Bane of your existence.
Pain in the ass.
Annoying as hell.
Your best friend, Rafe Cameron.
You tried so hard to not be in love with him, to only be his friend. Mostly because it would make your life so much less complicated, but also because you hated proving that saying right by being in love with your guy best friend.
“Hey, you still with us?”
“What?”
Rafe stared at you with a frown, before he plucked the joint from your lips.
“You nearly smoked the entire thing by yourself. What’s got you thinking so hard?”
He raised an eyebrow at you while taking a hit from the joint, barely pulling it from his lips before Kelce snagged it from him.
“Greedy bitch,” Rafe huffed before he turned his attention back to you. “You tired, precious? Want to leave?”
You rolled your eyes at the nickname - despite the long tradition of it - and shook your head. “Nah. It’s not even one. And Topper hasn’t made a fool of himself yet.”
“Fuck you,” Topper shot back immediately, moving his cup out of the way when you reached for it. “No, no drinks for mean girls.”
“Come on, don’t be such an asshole,” you whined, smacking your mouth a little to get rid of the dryness the joint has left. Making grabby hands at the cup, you annoyed Topper until he finally gave in, handing you his cup. You took a big gulp, before you pulled a face, pushing the cup back into his hands, barely able to swallow whatever the hell he was drinking.
“Ew, what is that?”
“Some girl in the kitchen made it for him,” Rafe told you, snickering. “I don’t think he was even watching what she was pouring into his cup. Too entranced by her pretty eyes.”
“She said she’s a bartender,” Topper said defensively and you only snorted. He made it far too easy for girls to mess with him.
“Top, I love you,” you said, getting to your feet and straightening your clothes in the process. “But please, you can’t keep falling in love with every pretty girl who pays attention to you.”
“But I’ve been in love with you for six years precious,” Topper proclaimed as he clutched his chest melodramatically, “When will you give me a chance?”
You only scoffed at his antics, twisting your hair up before putting a hair clip in it. “You wish,” you said, slapping his hands away. “I’ll get us some new drinks.”
“I’ll come with,” Rafe offered.
“Can you get me one too?” Kelce piped up and you pinched his cheek, making him wince.
“Vodka soda?”
Kelce gave you a dirty look, rubbing his cheek before he nodded petulantly. You gave him a thumbs up, grabbing Rafe by the wrist to drag him inside.
It was incredibly packed as soon as you entered the house from the backyard, the body heat from about 50 drunk people raising the temperature indoors and it smelled like the inside of a beer keg. Rafe kept his hand on your lower back, to not lose track of you as you carefully weaved between the people on your way to the kitchen. You tried not to get distracted by how his hand occasionally brushed over your exposed skin whenever your top rode up. He had always been this way. Running a hand through Topper’s hair to annoy him, clasping Kelce’s shoulder whenever he drank too much and was hanging over the toilet, squeezing Wheezie’s arm in a quick hug, and keeping his hand on your lower back whenever the two of you were walking somewhere crowded. He liked to show affection the way his father failed to do. So you refused to overthink it when his hands splayed over your skin, despite your heart racing whenever it happened.
Losing yourself to your thoughts for a second, you didn’t pay any attention when some guy walked into you, too busy talking with his friend to watch where he was going. You nearly went flying face down on the ground, but Rafe’s hand quickly found your waist, steadying you.
“Hey, watch it!” Rafe snapped at the guy, who only raised his hands in defense.
“I’m fine,” you insisted, gently pushing his hands off of you. “We’re nearly there, don’t start a fight.”
Out of the corner of your eyes, you could see Rafe giving the guy a stink eye before you reached the kitchen, where it luckily wasn’t as cramped, with only a handful of people mingling and talking. Grabbing four cups off of the stack on the kitchen island, you pursed your lips as you let your eyes roam over the options, rows, and rows of alcohol.
“Do you want a beer or something harder?”
“Beer, I think I might have to drive us home,” Rafe replied, grabbing the vodka bottle that was on his left, and handing it to you.
You unstacked the cups on the counter and poured vodka into three of them. Rafe reappeared by your side - not that you had noticed him leaving, you were too focused on making sure there was an equal amount of vodka in all the cups - sipping on a beer, a jug of cranberry juice in his other hand. You grabbed the jug out of his hand, wordlessly, filling your cup to the brim.
“Where’s the club soda?” you asked, glancing at him over your shoulder. Rafe only shrugged.
“Couldn’t find it.”
“Here’s club soda, Rafe,” a flirty voice suddenly said, and Monique Colver batted her long, fake eyelashes at Rafe.
“Thanks Monique,” Rafe replied with a smirk, taking the bottle to give it to you, which you accepted wordlessly.
Here we go.
“Call me Moni.”
“Moany?” you muttered under your breath while you filled the other two cups, barely wincing when Rafe gave you a side eye, acting like he was listening to every word that left Monique’s lips.
“- but I told my dad I really wanted to travel a bit so he got a me a trip to Europe.”
“Oh yeah? What countries you tryna see?”
Ugh.
You downed your entire cup in one go, already refilling it when you heard “show you” and “upstairs” and you rolled your eyes. You lifted your cup to your lips, basically putting your entire face in it, really, anything to remove yourself from this conversation, only pausing with drowning yourself when you felt Rafe’s hand on your lower back. Again.
“I’ll be upstairs with Monique, a’ight?” he said, muttering in your ear. “Are you okay getting the drinks to the boys?”
“Yeah yeah,” you huffed with a wave. “Go on. Be safe.”
Rafe smirked at you, ignoring how Monique was staring daggers at you. “Come get me if anything’s wrong, you hear me precious?”
You flipped him off and he took that as a sign to leave, following Monique as she dragged him upstairs.
“Bitch,” you muttered to yourself, grabbing the three cups on the counter and heading back outside to the boys.
It was a miracle that not a single drop was spilled on the way, probably because you were too busy trying not to imagine what was going on upstairs.
“There she is!” Kelce greeted you. “Almost died of thirst. What took you so long?”
“Don’t ask,” you muttered, handing them the drinks and Topper eyed you suspiciously. Acting like you didn’t notice it, you plopped yourself into the empty seat next to them, taking a big gulp from your drink.
“Where’s Rafe?”
“Where do you think?” you said with a sigh, giving him a look.
You weren’t jealous.
Okay, you were.
But it wasn’t the main reason why you were so annoyed.
You just hated it when the girls Rafe hooked up with always treated you like you were their competition, like you would take him away from them.
Which, fair, you could if you wanted. If you faked an injury or being sick, Rafe would immediately drop them to get you home.
But he’d never want you the way he wanted them. Yes, you knew he loved you, and yes he was your best friend, but you couldn’t help but want more. Maybe that was selfish. You let out a small sigh, leaning your head on Kelce’s shoulder, missing the way he glanced at Topper. Lucky for you, they decided against pushing it. Taking a sip from your drink, you tried not to think about Monique and Rafe. It didn’t help that the vodka and the joint were starting to work, spreading into your system, making you feel all warm and woozy, your head cloudy.
Your eyebrows shot up when Rafe suddenly appeared, squeezing himself between you and the armrest, his hair disheveled. You were still stewing, looking at him with a crease on your forehead.
“That was quick,” you noted. “Where did you leave Moany?” You couldn’t help but ask, putting emphasis on her nickname.
Rafe only shook his head, plucking your cup out of your hand to take a big gulp.
“That man is traumatized,” Kelce pointed out, nodding in understanding like he didn’t need any further explanation.
“Wait, Monique Colver?” Topper asked. “She’s pretty, isn’t she?”
Rafe held up his hand, stopping him. “Yes, but that wasn’t the problem.”
You rolled your eyes, already knowing what was coming. He was such a drama queen sometimes.
“What did she do?”
Rafe didn’t answer, taking another sip of the drink, before he winced. “She told me to call her precious.”
“What?!”
“HUH??”
“Ew!”
“You know what’s the worst?” Rafe groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. “I didn’t even get off.”
“That’s your biggest problem??”
He rolled his eyes at you, shifting on the sofa. “Pretty big, yeah.”
“Ugh.”
“Can we get back to Monique wanting you to call her precious?” Kelce interjected. “Did Rafe call you precious in front of her?”
“Yes, very clearly. There’s no way she didn’t hear,” you replied.
“Maybe she hates your guts and she wanted to roleplay being you while Rafe abuses her in a sex-way.”
“Kelce, literally never open your mouth again,” you groaned, covering your ears with your hands, while Topper cracked up, Rafe only pulled a face.
“It makes sense,” Topper insisted. “Like, precious is the only girl who’s been around us, or well, Rafe, constantly. You know, apart from Sarah and Wheezie. Maybe that was Monique’s way of telling you she wants to be your girlfriend.”
“What?” Rafe asked, his forehead creased.
You snorted, shaking your head. “You’re giving her way too much credit, I think she’s just weird.”
“You’re biased,” Topper pointed out, reaching behind Kelce’s to boop you on the head. “I don’t think you’ve ever liked any of the girls Rafe hooked up with.”
“Ugh, what’s there to like? They either act like I’m invisible or are passive aggressive bitches,” you huffed, smacking his hand away. Rafe snickered, throwing an arm around your shoulder to pull you close, pressing a kiss on your head.
“They’re jus’ jealous, cuz you’re the only girl I keep around.”
“Get off me,” you grumbled, your cheeks warming regardless. Rafe knew how to make you feel special.
Kelce yawned, stretching his arms, laying one of them on top of Rafe’s arm around your shoulder. “This party sucks. And I’m starving.”
“I’m so down for tacos right now, do you think Mateo’s still open?” Topper asked, sitting up straight because if there was one thing he took seriously, it was tacos.
“It’s two am on a Saturday,” you pointed out, and his shoulders sagged. You exchanged looks with Rafe, a grin growing on your face. “His truck is definitely still open.”
“Alright!” Topper cheered, jumping up. “Let’s go then!”
He dragged the rest of you off of the couch, herding you through the backyard and to the car, all the while laughing and joking around. You ignored the dirty looks you received from others as you got into the passenger seat, Rafe getting into the driver’s seat of his truck.
It didn’t take long until Rafe pulled up into the parking lot where Mateo’s food truck was parked, the four of you tumbling out of the car, Topper nearly falling flat on his face as he sprinted to the food truck. The light was still on, with faint Spanish music playing in the background.
“If it isn’t my four favorite Kooks,” Mate said, wiping the counter with a towel, before throwing it over his shoulder, eyeing you expectantly as you stood in a row in front of him. “Can I help you?”
“Do you have any carne asada tacos?” Kelce asked, peering over the display.
“Even four would be enough,” Topper added, wringing his hands nervously.
Mateo sighed and you’d already come to terms with having to go to bed with a taco craving, before he grinned at you, shaking his head fondly.
“Grab some drinks and have some patience, I’ll feed you in a second.”
Ten minutes later, the four of you were chowing down on some tacos, washing it down with ice-cold cans of coke.
“Fuck, I so needed this,” Topper moaned, biting into his third taco and you rolled your eyes at him, dabbing at your mouth with a napkin.
“Get it together Top.”
Rafe nudged you with his knee, giving you a look. “Give him a break, I know you’ve been craving some tacos as well,” he said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, which made you pull a face.
“Eurgh, please use a napkin you slob.”
You pushed the stack of napkins in his direction and he only grinned at you, picking up some off the stack to wipe his mouth.
“What would I do without you?” he teased, but you only rolled your eyes fondly, picking up some nachos.
“Whatever, eat your damn taco.”
Rafe squeezed your wrist with his clean hand, and you only leaned your head on his shoulder, starting to zone out when they started talking about some new boat, just enjoying their company. Honestly, you were glad you had them. Even if they were boys, incredibly dumb, and lacked a little tact sometimes, you wouldn’t trade it for the world. You glanced down, where your legs were pressed against Rafe’s as you sat next to each other on the picnic bench, just like always.
Maybe, you thought to yourself, maybe this was enough.
“You good?” Rafe asked, raising a brow at you, taco halfway into his mouth.
“Yep, ‘m perfect.”
It had to be.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦
author's note: tell me what you think pls!!!
🏷️list: @maybankslover
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bunnys-kisses · 2 months
Note
Hiii can I please have a profiteroles with a side of Martini and juice served by Charles Leclerc
bakery menu
want to order something? check out the menu! there are all kinds of things on it for your liking! these delicious items are waiting for you! if you want to submit for an order outside of formula one, please do! as for this, i feel so bad that i haven't written enough charles! charles is who got me into f1 originally, so to not write him a lot feels so weird! (the verstappen brain rot is real)! as for this, i love a good mafia au.
profiteroles ("come away with me. for a week, together. anywhere you want, we'll go.") + martini (mafia au) + juice (cockwarming) served by charles leclerc (formula one)!
cw: smut/pwp, mafia au, mafia boss!charles, cockwarming, clingy!charles, breast play/worship, college student!reader, devoted!charles
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you often found those mafia romance novels that were sold in the grocery stores rather amusing. the cheesy covers and titles, the dumb plots and the over exaggeration of characters. it was all very.. funny.
mostly because you had nabbed yourself your own mafia lover. and while he was one of the most dangerous men in monaco. around you he was a huge suck-up.
while in public he was smiles and a sharp eye. behind the scenes he was vicious and scary. but, when it was just the two of you alone in the mansion you called home. charles leclerc, was mafia prince of monaco, wanted nothing more than to feel the soft flesh of his lover between his calloused hands.
and love you like the precious gem you were.
he had come from a week in the netherlands. it was always nice to see his long time friend, you knew business was talked about, but you tried not to pry too deeply. charles tried to keep your name and face out of that line of work, the last thing he needed was his princess to have a price of her head.
for all everyone knew, you were a simple university student in one of the most beautiful places on earth. he had arrived home and beckoned for you to join him in the shower.
you kissed his bronzed skin, you chuckled when he returned the kisses. even brushing his lips across each of your fingers like a quiet worship.
he noticed the bandage on your finger and held your hand up to you. he tilted his head to the side like a puppy as he asked, "what's this, what happened?" his voice tinged with concern.
you chuckled, "i was chopping onions a few days ago and i nicked my finger. trust me, it was nothing serious. just keeping it covered to heal." you smiled at him.
he nodded and kissed your fingers, "you have to be careful, mon amor. i can't have you getting hurt when i'm not here." he kissed the bandage softly.
once your shower was done, you helped dry him off before you took him to the bed to get comfortable. you were both naked and curled up in bed together. you chose a movie to put on in the background while you became reacquainted with his body and him with yours.
you pressed your palm against his and noticed the difference in your hand sizes, "what was holland like, it's been so long since i've been there."
he chuckled, "same old, same old, mon amor. max had asked about you, he always asks about you. i told him to back off, he cold have any woman he wanted. but you are mine."
you giggled, "he's probably saying it to get under your skin." while you flew under the radar most of the time, at least with forces that could hurt you. but close friends of the family knew of you. like max verstappen, a close ally of charles. as a result the dutchman knew to mess with charles he simply had to bring you up.
it was like the time he mailed you a nijntje plush and charles was almost on the next flight to utrecht to kick his ass. in reality you had asked max to do that for you because you wouldn't be able to get it in monaco. (charles just forgot).
your lover's hands roamed your body and his cock twitched between his legs. he said softly, "i need you. i've needed you all week. you were all i could think of." his jaw tensed, "you drive me mad, mon amor. you're all i ever want."
you got him seated upright against the headboard and you straddled his waist. with a little help you sank down on his cock, but you didn't ride him. instead you warmed his cock as you straddled him. it slipped in with ease and the feeling made him shudder.
he wrapped those strong arms around you and held you. you got comfortable against his chest and kissed at the side of his neck. he melted into your touch, loving the feeling of you around him.
"i thought about you every moment i was away." he dipped his head towards your chest, he peppered kisses along the soft flesh, "i wondered if you were eating, sleeping, if you were going to classes." he sighed.
"i know, my dear." you said as you held him close to your chest and combed your fingers through his dark hair, "you were constantly texting me. i'm sorry that i couldn't text you during my lecture, you know all about that professor."
he sighed, "i could kill him."
you pulled away further and wagged your finger at him, "don't you care, leclerc. he is one of the best professors in the region." and he whined, you let him press himself back to your chest.
you let out a small noise when he mouth captured your left nipple. his hands explored your bare back, yearning for the closeness. his cock was heavy inside of you and you played with his hair.
the movie played on in the background, the light from the television cascaded you in a soft glow. you rolled your hips a little to give him a bit of friction, which made a shiver run up his spine.
"i love you." he said.
"i love you too." you yanked on his hair a little bit and he moaned with your nipple in your mouth. he played with your breasts, cupping them in his hands.
oh lord, you were perfect. those beautiful eyes looked to you and you smiled down at him. you leaned in and kissed his forehead. you rolled your hips a little more and let the feeling wash over both of you.
to just be so softly intimate felt nice, after time apart from one another. to feel close to your mafia boyfriend, felt good. he left a few marks across your soft breasts which only made you clench around his cock.
"you're my whole world, mon amor. to the ends of the earth, i love you."
"and i love you, charles." it wasn't the easiest thing being in love with someone so powerful. but the way he looked at you, the way he wore his heart on his sleeve for you. all the risks seemed to fade away, you loved him and he loved you.
you two continued to kiss once more, you knew that he was getting hot all over. his skin felt electric as you pressed your hands on his chest. you could feel his racing heartbeat as the two of you made out.
he looked up at you as you held his face, you rubbed the scar on his cheek, you could see the hearts in his eyes. "my world." he said.
"my universe."
he chuckled, "you always have to one-up me, huh?" he kissed your neck softly as felt the shudder of pleasure through his body. he knew he was close, he held onto you while the movie played and softly thrusted up into you. he couldn't handle it anymore. he kissed at your collarbones and groaned against your warm skin.
"i love you."
"and i love you more, forever. you are mine until the sun swallows the earth whole." he promised. he just wanted to be smothered by you, to hold onto you tightly. to love you with all of his heart.
he was in heaven, heaven was you. you were the angel that whatever god sent down to him. and he'd worship the ground you walked on until the ends of the earth. you were his soul, his beating heart.
not even the mafia lifestyle could pull the love he had for you out of him. you were the reason why he never got cold.
he shuddered as orgasm took over. then it ended with you on your back and him looming over you. those eyes of his transfixed you as he panted heavily. he pulled you in for a kiss, "i love feeling close to you." he said quietly. he looked down at you, his cock still buried in your at the hilt, the movie droned in the background. he kissed your jaw, "come away with me. for a week, together. anywhere you want, we'll go."
you smiled at him and draped your arms around him. you yearned for your own orgasm, you leaned up and kissed him on the lips, "i'd like to go back home."
"home? i thought i was your home." he pressed himself against you, his mind clearing up from the orgasm.
"i mean my childhood home." you played with his hair, "you've shown me your world, now i want to show you mine. it might not be as extravagant as monaco, but.... i want to make memories with you there."
he perked up at the thought. you wanted to show him your life. the life you had before you met. he broke out into a grin and wrapped his strong arms around you. he kissed at you face and said, "of course. i would love to meet your family, see your home. thank you! thank you!"
you smiled and kissed him once more. even with his cock still snugly inside of you. it was cute to see him light up. you've seen the headlines and his face in the paper. you've seen what he's capable of. but when he was with you, he was nothing more than a sweet puppy.
you kissed him once more before you shifted and asked, "now why don't you make me cum before we start to make plans, handsome?" you giggled as you pulled him in for a kiss once more.
those romance novels were silly, because if they were writing mafia bosses the way that your beloved charles was, the stories would be a lot less steamy and a lot more clingy. <3
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apoemaday · 5 months
Text
Death Is Nothing at All
by Henry Scott Holland
Death is nothing at all I have only slipped away into the next room I am I and you are you Whatever we were to each other That we are still Call me by my own familiar name Speak to me in the easy way you always used Put no difference into your tone Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow Laugh as we always laughed At the little jokes we always enjoyed together Play, smile, think of me, pray for me Let my name be ever the household word that it always was Let it be spoken without effort Without the ghost of a shadow in it Life means all that it ever was There is absolute unbroken continuity What is death but a negligible accident? Why should I be out of mind Because I am out of sight? I am waiting for you for an interval Somewhere very near Just around the corner All is well. Nothing is past; nothing is lost One brief moment and all will be as it was before How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!
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malertop · 4 months
Note
OMG,can you do Peter Parker (Tom Holland) x Male Reader where Peter is fucking himself on a dildo while moaning about Male Reader and then Male Reader caught him (let's say because he just kissed Peter and wanted to see him) and then Peter stop's and pulls out the dildo but his asshole was so sloppy and gaped/wrecked/opened that he couldn't move and then he uses that moment and snatched the male reader, first he gave him a blowjob and then he started to fuck himself on male reader cock,ahd in the end he becomes a mess and his asshole was gaped even more when Male Reader pulls his cock out
Peter Parker x Male Reader
CAUGHT YOU
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"Oh, oh shit- ah~" Peter breathed out as he was slowly picking up the pace of fucking himself on his dildo. His thoughts wandered, his mind only thinking about what it would be like if it was Y/N's cock, long and thick, thrusting deep inside of him. He closed his eyes as he started bouncing on it more and more, unable to suppress his needy moans. He couldn't stop himself. He was thrusting the dildo deeper inside of him, moaning from the painful enjoyment as his hole was starting to get bigger and sloppier. "Ugh-Ah Y/N~" Peter moaned again as he continued bouncing himself towards the dildo deeper and deeper, his hands were on his nipples as he was playing with them, just making him moan more and more, god knows how the bed is still okay after his hard and fast bounces from his legs.
"Hey Petey I wanted to te-" Y/N said as he barged through the door,not noticing the moans that left from Peter's mouth until he entered and heart them himself.Peter opened his eyes and seeing someone who he did not expect to see, his boyfriend , the person he is just fantasising is Infront of him and indeed shocked. Peter pulled out the dildo as his hole was gaped opened, his rose revealed and his hole opened as it was very much to add sloppy and wet. "I-" Y/N said with a shocked face as he couldn't say a thing, his eyes were on his boyfriends hole and body. Peter stayed in the bed as he was panting not knowing what to do now.
1 Hour ago:
"Okay so we're here" Y/N said with a smile as he was holding Peter's hands "Thank you for coming with me" Peter said as they both stood Infront of his and aunt May house/apartment "Don't mention it Petey, you know I will always do anything for you!" Peter blushed as Y/N finished his sentence, Y/N and Peter let go of their hands now no longer holding their hands "Okay Petey, love you but I need to go" Y/N said as with a smile again and started to walk out but then he felt a hand stopping him "Wait!" Peter said as he held Y/N's hand "What is it?" Y/N asked with a smile and confused voice "Just...That!" Peter said and put his lips on Y/N's mouth and kissed him, the kiss continued for 2 minutes but then aunt May opened the door "Hey boys-Oh, Sorry!" She said as she entered inside again, giving them privacy as they both let go "Okay..I think now it really is time to go!" Y/N said with with a smile while they both chuckled as they both smiled and looked at each other.
Present:
Peter looked at Y/N and thought that maybe that was finally his moment and he should use it while he can, Peter shot a web on Y/N's chest and snatched male reader towards him, Y/N landed in the bed next to Peter who started to kiss him, he let his tongue inside Y/N's mouth as Y/N didn't expect that, Y/N followed and did the same after 1 minute. Peter put one of his arms on Y/N's face while the other one was on his tight , Peter finally let go of the kiss as he placed his hand on Y/N's place and went straight for the zipper. "W-Wait Pete..you know I am a virgin" Y/N said with a shaky voice as he was still shocked and now nervous from Peter's actions "Well you know..it's time to change that" Peter said with a smirk as he started to unzip Y/N's pants "Wait!" Y/N shout as his cock was now revealed "I knew you were big..but not that big Y/N" Peter said with a smirk as his hands touched Y/N's cock, Y/N cock leaked out pre-cum from Peter's touch which made Peter blush and smirk more and was now more than ready for his next step, he looked at Y/N eye's and put his tongue on his tip which made him leak more pre-cum.
"Ahh-Pete..W-augh~" Y/N moaned as he felt Peter's mouth on his cock, Peter started moving his head up and down, Peter was taking Y/N's cock fully inside his mouth, gagging on his cock as he moved his head up and down but that didn't stop him. Peter had the majority of Y/n's cock in his mouth, sucking him off at a rhythmic pace. His hand was around the base, jerking the other off. Peter only wanted for Y/n to be sent over the edge, so he did his best - adding to the pleasure with his hand in compensation for what he couldn't fit in his mouth. His eyes rolled as he continued to gag on Y/N's cock as Y/N moans didn't stop, Peter stopped at the deepest he could, gagging himself as his eyes rolled again as he could feel Y/N's cock in his throat, Peter let go with the sound of a 'pop' and started panting, breathing for air as he looked at Y/N who was also panting and all red from blushing.
"You know Y/N.." Peter said as he was still breathing for air "for a virgin...you last long" he said with a smirk as he got on top of Y/N "guess we're going the next way, the one I've always wanted.." Peter said with a smirk as he could feel Y/N's cock touching his asshole, he looked at Y/N and said "you will fill so much better Y/N..just let my hole handle it.." with a smirk and entered himself on Y/N's cock "Oh-F-Oh, shit!" he moaned as he felt Y/N's cock inside of him,opening his hole "Pete-Oh my gosh!" Y/N moaned as he felt Peter's walls around his cock. His tight hole was easily starting to open as Peter started sliding even more thanks to his sloppy hole "Fuck Y/N, you're wrecking me!~" Peter said as he finally took Y/N's cock fully inside of him, which made his eyes wide for a second as he gasped , feeling Y/N cock fully inside of him was something he always wanted and now he has it. Peter fastly started fucking himself on Y/N's cock , not giving a second to be wasted as he wanted Y/N to cum inside of him "Fuck Y/N! You're destroying my pussy!~" Peter moaned as he looked at Y/N who couldn't even move as he was all red, blushing from the situation as he sees his nerdy cute adorable strong boyfriend fucking himself on his own cock, losing his virginity. Peter started thrusting himself on Y/N's cock faster which made his eyes roll from the enjoyment "Fuck-Ah, fuuuuuck my boy cunt is getting so wrecked!~" Peter said as he started losing his mind "Pete w-wait I feel like I am going to cum!" "Then cum inside of me Y/N, cum inside my boy pussy and make it a mess!~" Peter said as he was thrusting faster, moaning so much that probably his neighbours could hear him "FUCK MEE Y/N! DESTROY MY CUNT AND FILL ME UP WITH YOUR CUM!~" Peter loudly said with moans "Wai-No Pete..I-i am cumming!~" Y/N said as he finally Y/N came inside of Peter who's eyes rolled as he stopped thrusting "finally..I got your cum inside of me" Peter said with a smile as he pulled out of Y/N's cock, his asshole was gaped even more than before as his rose came out for a second, Peter looked at his hole which was gaped as his rose was out and then slapped it which made the rose go back inside of his gaped asshole, cum falling out of his hole, dripping Y/N's cum out as Peter smirked and looked at Y/N "you destroyed me N/N..and it was so so so good.."
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etherealstar-writes · 3 months
Text
I WANNA BE YOURS | WOSO X READER | PT 16
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pairings: woso x reader
summary: in which you're accidentally added to a random group chat, not knowing they're all actually famous footballers, and obliviously end up having many of them competing for your love and attention.
part: sixteen
part one here
✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦
THE NATIONAL DIVING TEAM
the imposter aka y/n ❤️
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felt lotte 😔
neev you went to a wsl match and to an arse-nal one of all ?! i thought you were a chelsea supporter y/n 😔 how could you do this to me bae
kyra who the hell would be sane enough to support chelshit?
elton PLS
willybum CHELSHIT HAHAHA
neev are we seeing this rn sam @ samtheskippa the disrespect
sam the skippa kyra lillee cooney-cross
kyra erm mum, save me @ stephy
stephy i ain't getting involved in this
kyra 😔
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meado oh my lord
tom holland's twin i have a concussion y/n ✌️ twinning
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ want me to come over and we can watch movies i'll bring ice-cream
tom holland's twin pls do 🙏
stairway why is lotte getting special treatment? i sprained my ankle the other day
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ sucks to be you
elton are you seriously still mad at us for accidentally giving you a concussion
the imposter aka y/n ❤️
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neev i'll make it up to you with nandos i'll pay 🙏
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ okay
willybum that's all it took for you to forgive her? nandos?
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ hey, nandos is fire 🔥 only ppl with taste can understand
mccard real
kyra real
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ and i can never stay mad at you guys for long
the REAL karate kid yayyy
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ but tillies are still my number one
willybum NOOO
kyra YESSS as you should 💪
the REAL karate kid okay but you support arsenal yeah? 🥺🙏
neev NAHH chelsea 🤍💙🥺🙏
brightness chelsea 🤍💙
flaming hot chelsea 🤍💙
sam the skippa aye up the blues 🤍💙
elton NAHH yanited 🔛🔝
earpsy yesss ❤️🖤
zelem ❤️🖤
turner ❤️🖤
hempo it's actually mancity thank you very much
lani ayeee
esme yess
chloe that's right
kyra nah y'all are absolutely delulu it's fairly obvious y/n should support ausenal we're superior 💪
wilybum you mean arsenal 🤨 ❤️🤍
kyra yeah that of course 😁 ❤️🤍
the REAL karate kid ❤️🤍
meado ❤️🤍
tom holland's twin ❤️🤍
mccard ❤️🤍
ford ❤️🤍
stephy ❤️🤍
stairway NAH WHAT THE FLIIP WE HAVE MOST OF THE ARSENAL TEAM HERE THIS IS UNFAIR
neev YEAH UNFAIR FR
cha cha i was gonna suggest spurs ....
willybum OH HELL NAH
the REAL karate kid NO
elton ABSOLUTY NOT
cha cha okay okay geez
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ i think i should remain unspoken about this topic before things get more out of hand ....
neev NAH this is an important life decision y/n
rusty metal wait y/n barca will welcome you with open arms
willybum THEY AREN'T A WSL TEAM LUCY
rusty metal i thought it was just clubs in general 😔
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ barca is lookin very convicing ngl and i most def support ausenal (and lotte) 🇦🇺✊
mccard technically i'm an honorary aussie so do i count in ausenal 👀
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ of course
neev i thought we had a connection y/n 😔
willybum why not lionessenal 😔
meado that is a terrible name
the REAL karate kid fr
willybum sue me for tryin why don't you think of something better then
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ nahh doesn't hit the same as ausenal
willybum i liked it better when you didnt know who we were and supported me 😔
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ that isn't very cash money of you willybum
ona you should come to barcelona y/n!
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ anything for you ona 🙏
stairway nahhh come support bayern in germany 💪
kie barca is superior actually
rusty metal that's right!
willybum they're overrated
kie you did not
ona added la reina
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ MOTHER ALEXIA EKBHFlkuweqBFQLUEB NO WAY OMG IVE PASSED AWAY
neev HELP the alexia putellas being added to this gc was NOT on my bingo card this year 😭
ona alexia, leah williamson just said barca is overrated
willybum deleted a chat
willybum i don't know what she's talking about alexia you're amazing
la reina thank you? your nickname is ... creative
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ alexia will you adopt me?
la reina what?
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ what? erm you are insanely peng oml
ona i thought i was peng 😔
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ YOU ARE
ona then you need another compliment for her
kyra alexia is very mother actually
cha cha she is fr
neev seconded
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ but steph is mother for me 🙏 alexia is literally la reina, my queen 😩
stephy what in the world are you guys talking about 😭
rusty metal wait what am i then?
neev grandma duh
rusty metal i shouldn't have asked 😭
ona grandma lucy hahaha
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ ona i'm packing my bags rn coming to barca right away for you
ona i shall be waiting
willybum i can't believe we're being forgotten about 😔
kyra no one cares lord farquaad
willybum you pest 😒
willybum changed kyra's name to pest
pest wow
willybum suits you very well
pest that's not gonna stop me from pestering you, willybum you do realise that
willybum steph control your child
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ but i never did anything 😔
willybum NOT YOU ALSO SINCE WHEN HUH? 😭
stephy do you have a problem with my children, williamson?
willybum erm no
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ mother, kyra is hogging your favourite son from your favourite daughter
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stephy kyra give calvin back to y/n
pest wow i'm the neglected middle child i guess 😒
the imposter aka y/n ❤️ L
✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦
not me finally posting another crappy chapter 🤭
next part here
478 notes · View notes
Text
Marry you
Pairing: Elizabeth Olsen x Fem!Reader
Summary: During an interview, someone asks you to marry them and your girlfriend isn't happy about it
Disclaimer: English is not my first language.
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MASTERLIST | READ PART TWO | READ PART THREE
“My next question is for Y\N.”
Hearing your name being said from somewhere in the crowd in front of the stage, you looked up and quickly finished drinking your water to put the bottle back on the small stool they placed between your and Evan’s chairs. That was the first question directed at you since everyone else who got a chance to ask a question to the Marvel actors seemed more interested in asking things to the people who had been a part of that universe for longer. You couldn’t blame them because that was your second year being a part of that large cast and that was your first ComicCon, not to mention that your colleagues and friends were very entertaining to watch answering the fans' questions.
Now, however, someone was about to ask you something and you got excited very fast. You had prepared to be asked a number of questions about your character, who had featured in two different movies in the MCU and was about to get a movie with her very own name after making success among the fans. You took the microphone that Scarlett elegantly gave to you from where she was sitting in front of you and waited to hear the question. Your eyes scanned the large crowd to find who was about to talk to you, finding someone standing with the microphone in hand after a few seconds.
“Yes?” You prompted the man to talk and also to let him know you were paying attention to what he was about to say.
“Will you marry me?”
There was a beat of stunned silence before the theater erupted in laughs. You were so surprised by his words - and fairly disappointed for having to hear that type of question when all the men got asked very deep questions before - that it took you a moment to go back to the present. You pressed your lips in a thin line and looked around while you thought about your answer. You didn’t want to be rude, but you also didn’t want to let this guy think he was so amazing for asking that type of thing.
Most of your cast mates were laughing around you, but you saw the way Scarlett turned around to throw you a sympathetic smile, which certainly brought you some comfort at least. Brie was also one of the few who didn’t think it was funny, and you thought you may have seen Holland grimacing a bit. There was another roll of chairs behind you and you couldn’t see the reaction of anyone sitting there. You couldn’t see if your girlfriend, Elizabeth Olsen, was sharing an awkward laugh with everybody or if she was as stunned as you.
You had been dating for quite some time now and, although you didn’t make any effort to keep it a secret, the public hadn’t connected the dots yet - which was a first. You liked to think you knew Elizabeth enough to know she didn’t find that question to be funny, though. Not because she would go jealous or anything, but because she could see it was a sexist joke to make every man in the room laugh. The guy himself was accepting the catcalls his friends were throwing his way like he was the most amazing man on Earth, and that’s what made you decide to shoot back instead of going for a simple answer.
“Really?” You asked on the microphone. “You have the right to make one question, and that’s the question you’re going to make?” You added incredulity in your voice and more laughs filled the room, then you shifted to sarcasm - your greatest weapon. “I mean, we’re not going back to you. You know that, right? You have one question, you make it, and that’s it. You can’t make another one.” You could see Scarlett laughing honestly at you, her eyes shining with mirth, and then Elizabeth’s chuckles reached your ears as well. Before the guy could say anything else, you kept talking, dragging him without remorse. “I will give you two seconds to think if that’s what you want to ask.”
For dramatization, you raised your hand, slowly taking two fingers down while everyone else seemed to have fun with your actions. Even the guy who made the question was laughing, although you doubted he realized you were making fun of him.
“Fine, you can ask your question now,” you joked, pointing at him and reclining against your chair. You crossed your legs, placed an arm on the back of the chair, and turned your body to the side a bit to look directly at him.
And then, the question got asked again: “Will you marry me?”
Of course, laughs sounded all around one more time, even louder, and you bit the inside of your cheek while swinging the microphone in front of your mouth for a few seconds. Then, when the laugh died a bit, you crossed your arms. “Give me a reason to do it. Come on.”
“I have money!” The guy shouted since the person mediating the questions had already removed the microphone from his hand to move on to find someone else who wanted to participate.
“So do I, my dude!” You shouted back before remembering you didn’t have to.
However, as you realized everyone else was laughing again, you knew it was a nice reaction to have for the public. Brie, sitting a few chairs from you, had thrown her head back to laugh, and Scarlett placed a hand on your knee as if to show you support. You risked throwing a glance behind you and caught the way Elizabeth was smiling at you and that’s all you needed to keep going on with that crazy conversation.
“Really, I have money. So, unless you’re an Arabian Prince or something, I don’t think I will be too impressed with your bank account,” you provoked and then leaned over to point at him with your free hand. “I mean, if you are an Arabian Prince, you wouldn’t want to marry me to start with because, you know, I’m not a virgin. That ship has sailed, my friend.” More laughs. “Are you a prince of some sort?” You watched as the man shook his head and started sitting down, laughing so hard you were a bit worried he would stop breathing soon. Well, at least he wasn’t offended by your reaction, but you kind of wished he was. “There we go. So you’re not a prince. And I have money, so I’m not interested in that. I’m not saying I’m richer than you, but I would only get impressed if you were a prince, sorry.”
“Someone is going to have nightmares lost in the desert tonight,” Robert joked over his own microphone, causing some more laughs.
“No, really,” you kept talking, looking at him now. “He had one question and that’s the one he chose. I even gave him a chance to make up his case because I totally ignored the biggest reason why I wouldn’t marry him. I’m gay! Everyone knows it.”
Now you were just drawing the moment because you couldn’t help yourself. People were laughing and they were having fun, and you wished to keep it like that. Also, it was a way of letting everyone know you wouldn’t put up with stupid shit like that. It could’ve been much worse, you knew that. You had seen the amount of sexist questions Scarlett got asked through the years, so you should be glad that it was a minor thing. Harmless, even, albeit very annoying. Even so, you wouldn’t let people think it was okay to brush your work to the side to ask those types of things.
“By the way,” you said, looking back to the crowd even if you couldn’t find the guy anymore, “thank you for ruining my first proposal.”
“No one ever asked you to marry them?” Holland asked in his overly excited manner.
“Nope.” You shook your head. “It just got ruined for me now. My first proposal and it happened like that.” Then, you pretended to be sad, pouting and everything.
“Oh, no,” Scarlett joined in the joke after stealing Robert’s microphone. “I hope the second one goes better.”
“Not as special as the first one.” You shrugged and that put an end to the subject, finally.
Everyone shared another laugh and the panel moved on after that. It was filled with more funny moments and you got asked some good questions after that, so, once it was over, everyone was in a good mood. Some of the cast had to attend another panel starting soon, but some of you decided to enjoy the mood to have a little celebration at the hotel bar. Once you all got there and got your drinks, your friends started talking about the things that happened during the panel, obviously addressing one of the most memorable moments.
“You dragged him!” Brie exclaimed with a laugh. “The guy has no idea what hit him!”
“He has no idea because he didn’t even realize he was wrong,” Scarlett pointed out gently, although she reached out to squeeze your shoulder. “But, damn, that was awesome.”
You rolled your eyes and shook your head. “If they don’t fire me now, I think I’m safe for another ten years or so.”
While everyone else chuckled and started talking among themselves, you noticed that Elizabeth was quiet beside you. She was sitting on the chair by your side, nursing a fancy drink that she had only taken a sip from, and looking from face to face without paying attention to what was being said. You couldn’t ignore it, of course, and quietly moved your chair a bit to get closer to her so you could lean over to whisper against her ear, masking your actions by pretending you were only getting closer to kiss her cheek.
“You okay?”
You pulled away a bit, but kept close by leaning your elbow on her armrest. Elizabeth glanced at you with wide eyes and surprise written all over her features, and you watched as she opened and closed her mouth a few times. Her pale cheeks acquired a pinky shade and, even if you worried with her, you also couldn’t help but think she was the cutest person on the planet.
“Yes, I am. Why do you ask?”
“You’re very quiet,” you pointed out gently.
“I’m always quiet, sweetie,” Elizabeth declared with a chuckle.
It was an earnest chuckle, not forced or faked, and it made you relax almost immediately. You rolled your eyes fondly now and leaned closer to kiss her cheek again “Not always,” you whispered before pulling away with one eyebrow arched, giving her a very meaningful look.
Elizabeth picked up the meaning behind your words and blushed a deep shade of red, which caused you to laugh loudly, bringing the attention of everyone back to you. Everyone there knew you two were dating and they quickly jumped in to tease both you and Elizabeth, much to your amusement and her distress.
The night was amazing despite that - or maybe because of that - but you all said your goodbyes before you got too excited with the drinks. Everyone needed to get up early the next day to be a part of more panels and other interviews, not to mention that having half of the Marvel cast getting drunk in a hotel bar was a very bad idea, so you all decided to call it a night.
You and Elizabeth kept company to Scarlett, walking her back to her room so she wouldn’t be alone, and then took the elevator again to go to the room you were sharing. As soon as you stepped inside, you kicked off your shoes and started taking off the vest you were wearing on top of a long-sleeved shirt. Elizabeth stepped in behind you, being much more pragmatic in her actions. She took her high heels and placed them neatly beside her empty luggage, then she started taking off her earrings while walking towards the safe deposit box where she had placed everything valuable. Meanwhile, you threw the vest away and lay on the bed with a deep sigh, arms and legs stretched out like a starfish.
“Oh, I wish I could sleep all day tomorrow,” you groaned, feeling the ache in your body make its presence known.
Elizabeth had her back turned at you, but you heard her chuckling softly at your words. “You should go take a shower before you pass out on the bed.”
You whined but you knew she was right. Elizabeth knew you better than anyone and she knew you could fall asleep in a minute without even realizing it. You were a bit sweaty and you also needed to remove the make-up you applied earlier that day, no matter how tired you were. Making loud noises just for drama effect, you got up and made your way to stand behind Elizabeth. She was slightly higher than you, something she liked to tease you about. You kissed Elizabeth’s shoulder gently and hummed when she leaned back against you. Your arms wrapped around her waist and you smiled when she rocked her body from one side to the other with you.
You stayed like that for a moment, just enjoying her presence and the silence in the room after a day filled with attending crowds and making interviews. After a while, Elizabeth turned around in your arms with a loving smile that made your heart a bit warmer. She pecked your lips before her hands moved to start undoing the buttons of your shirt, slowly revealing your bra beneath it. It wasn’t a sexual gesture at that moment, just something she decided to do for you to keep you close to her for another minute.
“Go take a shower,” she told you again. “You’re smelling like Evans.”
“He hugged me like a thousand times,” you complained, earning a kiss from her and an amused laugh.
You eventually managed to take the said shower, taking your precious time under the warm water to lose up some of your tense muscles. You would have to wake up extra early to wash your hair to have enough time to get to your first interview, and you wished you could stay in bed with your girlfriend all day. After getting out of the shower, you went through your skincare routine - the one that Scarlett forced on you until you put it in your daily agenda - brushed your teeth, and finally left the bathroom ready to jump in bed and go to sleep.
As soon as you stepped outside, though, you realized something was different. Well, it wouldn’t take a genius to notice that the lights around the room were almost all dim or the soft music playing in the background, but it surprised you enough that you stopped short in your tracks as you looked around. You opened your mouth to call out for Elizabeth when you spotted your girlfriend standing by one of the corners where a champagne bottle was left at some point when you were taking your shower.
You arched your eyebrow at her, but Elizabeth didn’t say anything as she walked towards you holding two glasses and smiling at you. She was still wearing her beautiful black dress, feet bare, and cheeks just a bit red, and you found yourself being rooted on the spot, hypnotized by her. You took one of the glasses when she got close enough and saw your girlfriend reach out to close the bathroom door behind you.
“What’s going on?” You asked when she took your free hand gently to pull you to the middle of the room. Elizabeth didn’t reply and you couldn’t help but keep talking out of nervousness. “I feel underdressed now. I already put my pajamas on, didn’t know we would be celebrating tonight. What are we celebrating, by the way?”
Elizabeth smiled throughout your rambling, eventually stopping you by squeezing your hand once. “There’s something I need to tell you,” she said.
“Okay,” you mumbled, suddenly much more nervous than before. The mood wasn’t somber, so you didn’t think it would be something bad, but you could never know.
“I had a plan,” Elizabeth started to explain. “I was going to wait for our anniversary, take you to ski or something equally dangerous because you enjoy this type of thing,” she chuckled fondly at that. “I would have more time to prepare a speech and there was going to be roses. I was still debating if I would do it before or after dinner.”
You had no idea what Elizabeth was talking about, so you didn’t try to stop her. Your heart was beating so fast inside your chest that you were afraid she might be hearing that, though she just looked utterly content looking at you.
“I got the champagne, at least, but the hotel couldn’t provide me the roses this late at night with such short notice. And we don’t have snow. It’s actually very, very, hot outside, and our dinner was old peanuts from the bar downstairs,” Elizabeth kept talking, her hand still holding yours and your glasses were dangerously forgotten. “You’re already in your pajamas and I’m not wearing the very cute dress I was thinking about wearing when I did this, but…” She paused, took a deep breath and let her eyes fall to your joined hands for a moment. “But I don’t think all of that would have made it any more special.”
“Lizzie,” you whispered, making her eyes snap back to yours. “I’m lost.”
Elizabeth laughed lowly and nodded. “Right, sorry.” She blinked at you. “I’m sorry someone ruined the first time you got proposed to and I can’t let you go with that lame proposal as your only proposal for longer.”
Okay, now you had a very clear idea where that was going and you felt your eyes widening immediately. Your racing heart started going even faster when Elizabeth let go of your hand to pull out a small blue box from somewhere between the folds of her dress. You had no idea how she hid that there, but you also didn’t care. Not right now. Elizabeth gently opened the box, with the inside turned at her yet, and smiled when she saw what was inside. Then, she held the box with the same hand that was holding her glass and reached out to take your hand again.
And then, because life wasn’t already crazy enough at that moment, Elizabeth got down on one knee in front of you.
“Y/N, will you marry me?”
She showed you the ring finally, but you honestly didn’t even mind what it looked like. What mattered was the woman in front of you asking you to spend the rest of your life with her. You loved Elizabeth and had known for a while that she was the one you wanted to share your life with, but you had never imagined she would be proposing to you. It surprised you enough to delay your reply for a couple of seconds, even if you had no doubt what your answer would be.
“Yes! Of course! Yes!”
Your voice was way higher than it had to be, but neither of you cared.
Still ignoring the box between you two, you leaned over to kiss her, bringing your hands to cradle her face. You forgot about the glass in your hand though and your kiss got interrupted by a yelp when Elizabeth felt the cold drink falling down her shoulder and ruining her dress. You parted and shared a look before bursting into a fit of laughter. You helped her go back to her feet, still holding her face - more carefully now - and you shared another kiss before she slid the ring on your finger.
Turns out you were wrong. Second time was even more special.
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niqhtlord01 · 8 months
Text
Humans are weird: Human's greatest hatred
( Please come see me on my new patreon and support me for early access to stories and personal story requests :D https://www.patreon.com/NiqhtLord Every bit helps)
Announcer: Welcome back to Fibnar’s most popular talk show
Crowd: NOMAR’S CORNER!!!!
Announcer: And here’s our host, NOMAR!
*Nomar slithers on stage, waves at camera and crowd*
Nomar: So nice to have a live audience for a change.
Nomar: Last rotation we taped in front of a crowd of Cyberdiams and I swear they were so quiet I could hear the electricity running through their circuits.
Audience: *Laughs*
Nomar: Tonight we have a real treat for you all with our first guest Holland Mackavich, author of the latest best seller “The mind of humanity”.
Nomar: Now I want to tell you all that Mr. Mackavich is in fact a human and it took a hell of a lot of effort to get him here tonight.
*Audience murmurs*
Nomar: That’s right.
Nomar: We had to offer him everything we had in the fridge and one of our interns as a sacrifice.
*Shocked audience*
Nomar: Don’t worry about the intern; we drew a smiley face on a lamp and said they were part of an exchange program.
*Audience laughs*
Nomar: Now let’s bring out our guest, Mr. Mackavich!
*Mackavich walks on stage and smiles at crowd before shaking Nomar’s hands and sitting down*
Nomar: Thanks for coming out tonight.
Mackavich: You know I could hear all of that back stage, right?
Nomar: Oh come now; you’re not upset about a few jabs are you?
Mackavich: Of course not.
Mackavich: You’re right about human’s being rather hungry.
Mackavich: In fact your wife invited me out to dinner later tonight.
Nomar: What?
Mackavich: She said she wanted to get a hold of some special man meat herself.
Audience: Ooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Nomar: *Forced chuckle* Well played.
*Nomar holds up book*
Nomar: Now you’re best seller here is doing well with non-humans as it tells them how your kind think and act.
Mackavich: That’s true.
Nomar: Aren’t you afraid this would be used by, say, military leaders?
Mackavich: My people are still here, so clearly they’re not reading it right.
Nomar: Well I have read this book, and it’s a great book.
Nomar: But there’s one thing I wanted to ask you that isn’t mentioned in your book.
Mackavich: Ask away.
Nomar: What species in the galaxy do humans hate the most?
Nomar: Is it the Fellions and their constant staring eyes? Or maybe the-
Mackavich: *Laughs*
Nomar: Do you find this funny?
Mackavich: A little bit, yeah.
Mackavich: Here I was preparing for hard questions and you give me the easiest one.
Nomar: Really?
Nomar: So who do human’s hate the most?
Mackavich: Humans.
Nomar: Excuse me?
Mackavich: Humans most hated species in the galaxy are other humans.
Nomar: Well…..that was…ah…that was not what I was expecting.
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waitimcomingtoo · 1 year
Text
And I Wouldn’t Marry Me Either
Pairing: Tom Holland x singer!reader
Synopsis: you release some songs about Tom after a disagreement ends in a breakup
Masterlist
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“Marry me.”
“Right now? But I just got comfortable.” Tom mumbled into his pillow with a sleepy smile.
“I’m serious.” You whispered through a laugh and shook his shoulder. Tom’s eyes slowly opened and he could see the blurry outline of you lying next to him in your bed.
“What?”
“I’m just thinking.” You began. “We’ve been together five years.”
“I’m aware.” Tom laughed and snuggled back into his pillow.
“So we should do it. We should get married.” You propped yourself up on your elbow to look at him.
“We are married. Everyone knows you’re my girl.” Tom said without opening his eyes and pulled you into his arms. He tried to go back to sleep but you still wanted to talk.
“I know.” You laughed. “But I want to make it official.”
“What, in Gods eyes and all that? I didn’t think you cared about that.” He laughed dismissively and rolled over. You sat up fully in the bed and looked down at him.
“It’s not about that. I want the flowers and the dress and the rings. Don’t you want that?” You asked and shook him a little to clue him in that you were trying to have a serious conversation. You watched Tom shrug and roll onto his back to look up at you.
“I don’t know. I always found weddings kinda dumb.”
“What? What do you mean dumb?” You forced a laugh and tried to hide the disappointment in your tone.
“I mean, like, they’re not even legally binding. It’s this whole big celebration that people spend their life savings on just to get drunk and slid rings on each other fingers. You still have to go to the courthouse to get married and even that’s just a piece of paper.”
“Oh. I didn’t realize you felt that way.” You laughed shortly and picked at your nail polish to look busy.
“I didn’t realize you felt a different way.” He said and rolled back onto his stomach. Tom closed his eyes to go back to sleep and you felt your heart sink in your chest. You got out of the bed and opened the curtains a little to distract yourself with the view. You touched the silky white curtains and smiled to yourself as you thought of all the pictures of white dresses you had saved on your Pinterest throughout the years.
“I’ve always dreamed of my wedding.” You said over your shoulder. “I think every little girl does at some point. Every rom com I grew up on ends with the perfect fairy tale wedding. I always wanted that. I wanted my happy ending.”
“But those are just movies. I bet half those couples wouldn’t last in real life.”
“But it’s sweet that they plan that special day together and then get to celebrate their love in front of all their family and friends.”
“Yeah, all that planning just so they can get divorced before the first year is up.” Tom snorted. “I think the whole idea of weddings are stupid. I mean, you spend all that time and money planning for a one day event that people will just attend for the free booze. Plus, women starve themselves for months and spend thousands of dollars on a dress they’ll wear once? It doesn’t make any sense.”
“Wow. Tell me how you really feel, Tom.” You laughed shortly and folded your arms to glare at him. Tom sensed your tone and sat up in bed to pay better attention.
“I just think it’s all so ancient.” He shrugged. “I’m surprised you don’t agree. Weddings cannot exist without all the bullshit sexist traditions. I mean, the white dress to symbolize the brides supposed purity, the father of the bride literally “giving her away” to another man after being asked permission to get engaged in the first place, and then to top it off with her taking his last name because she’s now his property or something. It’s all so trivial and perverse.”
“It doesn’t have to be like that. Those traditions may be rooted in old fashioned thinking but I think it’s sweet to ask for my fathers permission. And yeah, I do want my dad holding my hand and walking me down the aisle. He’s not giving me away to be another man’s property, he’s standing by my side as I enter a new chapter of my life. Which is why I want my mama right there on my other side. Plus, lots of people hyphenate their last names nowadays. It doesn’t have to be this monstrous sexism fest you’re making it out to be.” You rolled your eyes and walked into the bathroom that was attached to your bedroom. Tom frowned when you shut the door. You usually left it open a crack when you did your morning skincare routine, but today, you were shutting him out. Tom got out of bed and walked into the bathroom to see you. You didn’t look up at him as you washed your face.
“Come on. Are you seriously mad because I dissed your rom coms?” Tom said as he put his hands on your hips and kissed your shoulder.
“I’m not mad about that.” You mumbled and brushed him off.
“Then what are you mad about, sour patch?” He teased and kissed your shoulder again.
“I’m mad because I’ve been getting my nails done weekly leading up to our five year anniversary just in case you proposed and you just told me that’s never even crossed your mind!” You exclaimed as hot tears of embarrassment brimmed your eyes. You stormed out of the bathroom and when Tom processed what you had said, he followed after you.
“I don’t believe in marriage, okay? I think it’s unnecessary. Why can’t we just live like this forever? What’s the difference?”
“The difference is pretty big. But I guess you don’t see it like that.” You shrugged and kept walking away from him.
“Can you honestly tell me what would be different between us if we signed a stupid piece of paper at the courthouse or didn’t?” Tom said as he put his hands on your shoulders to keep you in place for a second.
“The difference is I’d be your wife and not just the pathetic girlfriend who stayed even though you didn’t lock it down.” You raised your voice at him and pushed his hands off of you.
“So you only want to get married because you care what people think? How romantic.” Tom rolled his eyes at you.
“That’s not the only reason. I want to get married because it’s important to me. It’s a public commitment where we promise to love and protect each other forever. I want that.”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t. I don’t need a ceremony to do that. I can promise you that right here.” Tom calmed down and took your hands.
“But that’s not special.” You sighed and withdrew your hands.
“If you don’t find that special then maybe you don’t love me as much as you think you do.” Tom said, immediately regretting it.
“What?” You whispered and looked into his eyes to see if he was serious.
“Look, darling, I’m sorry.” He said softly. “I just don’t see the point in marriage. I don’t need to prove I love you with a ring and wedding. I chose to love you every day. That’s enough for me.”
“What if it’s not enough for me?” You genuinely asked him as you wondered it for yourself.
“Then maybe you need to stop being so shallow and materialistic and ask yourself if you’re with me because you love me or because you want to play out some childhood fantasy that you saw in a stupid movie.” He shouted.
You both instantly got quiet. You were quiet for a very long time.
“I didn’t even mean that.”
“I don’t even care.” Your voice cracked as you grabbed your purse and slammed the front door behind you when you left.
“Is this one okay?” Harrison asked, pulling Tom out of his daydream. He replayed that fight over in his head about a dozen times a day. If his mind wasn’t occupied by something at all times, he’d perform an autopsy on that last conversation with you to try and understand what he should’ve done differently.
“What?” Tom asked without looking at his friend. He was too busy staring at the seat you always used to sit in at the kitchen counter.
“Can I use this one?” Harrison repeated and held up a muted purple mug as the tea kettle went off in the background. Tom tore his eyes away from your chair and when he saw the mug, all he could picture was your lipstick stain that used to stain it.
“That’s Y/n’s mug.” Tom said, descending a chill over the room. Harry and Sam’s attention was caught and they looked at Tom to see where this conversation was going.
“Oh. Sorry. I’ll put it back.” Harry said and quickly went to put it back in the cabinet.
“It’s fine. She’s not using it.” Tom shrugged. Everyone looked at each other as the awkwardness became palpable.
“How’s she’s doing?” Sam asked and sipped his tea to seem less interested than he really was.
“She’s good. Shes been recording some stuff at her New York studio. New music and whatnot.” Tom replied. He didn’t know this because you told him. He knew this because he’d been stalking your fanpages for every possible sighting of you.
“Have you guys talked lately?” Harry asked.
“Not really. Not since she left.” Tom admitted without looking up at his friends.
“You guys didn’t break up, did you?” Harrison asked, worsening the icy tension. Tom froze at the question for a minute and then shrugged. He didn’t really know what the answer was. In the weeks you’d been gone, you’d make small talk sometimes about work and the weather, but it never went beyond that. It was more to be polite. You kept in touch enough to know what the other was up to on a weekly basis, but you both knew you were dragging out something that had died. You wanted Tom to just say it was over already instead of pretending everything was normal, but he was never going to do that.
“I don’t know. We left things kinda up in the air.” Tom replied. The boys exchanged glances and Harrison nodded to let them know he was gonna take charge.
“Up in the air?” He questioned.
“Yep. Up in the air. Ambiguous. Vague. Open to interpretation. Call it what you want.” Tom shrugged again like it didn’t matter, but it did.
“Well what was the last thing you said to each other?” Harry wondered.
“She said she needed some space and was going to New York. And I said okay.” Tom recalled.
“What about before that?”
“I don’t know. We didn’t talk much in the days leading up to her leaving.” Tom replied and took a long sip of his tea.
“She didn’t speak to you?” Sam asked.
“She did.” Tom nodded. “Sometimes.”
“You didn’t speak to her?” Harrison asked, already knowing the answer.
“I didn’t have anything to say.” Tom shrugged. Nobody spoke a word, but all the boys were thinking the same thing. They knew how bad this was, and that it signaled the end of your relationship.
“What?” Tom asked when he noticed the shift in vibe.
“I’m just surprised.” Harrison shrugged. “You guys were never like this. I can’t even remember your last fight.”
“We didn’t fight. You can’t fight when you don’t speak.” Tom said with a sarcastic smile.
“You should call her.” Harry suggested. “It’s gonna be at least a week since she’s been there, right?”
“Four weeks.” Tom corrected without meeting anyone’s else.
“Mate, you gotta call her.” Harry said quietly and put his hand on Tom’s shoulder.
“I can’t.” Tom shook his head.
“Why not?”
“She can’t break up with me if I don’t talk to her. As long as we don’t have that conversation, we’ll still be together.”
“I’m not sure that’s how it works, Buddy.” Harrison said apologetically. Tom sucked in a sharp breath and looked at his friend with tears brimming his bloodshot eyes.
“I don’t know what else to do.” He said with a crack in his voice.
“Oh shit.” Sam said suddenly, getting everyone’s attention.
“What?” Tom asked.
“She’s dropping a song tonight. She just announced it.” Sam said and showed Tom your Twitter. Tom took Sam’s phone to read your announcement better. Sure enough, you had posted a picture of you dramatically lying across a piano bench with your left hand covering half of your face. You had a ring on every finger except for your ring finger, a detail that wasn’t lost on Tom. He handed Sam’s phone back and look at the floor.
“You didn’t know about this?” Sam asked, and Tom shook his head. He’d gone from being the first person you played every song for to finding out on Twitter that you had a song coming out.
“What’s it called?” Harrison wondered. Sam looked down at his phone to read the title and gulped.
“Who cares?” Sam forced a laugh and put his phone away.
“What’s it called?” Tom asked again.
“You Don’t Know Me Anymore.” Sam mumbled. Tom shut his eyes and hung his head in shame. He hadn’t even heard the song yet but knew it was going to be bad news.
“When does that come out?” He asked Sam.
“Midnight. Tonight.”
Tom’s friends stayed with him all day until midnight rolled around. At 11:58, Tom placed his laptop on the kitchen table and opened YouTube. He knew you always released lyric videos when you dropped a new song and he needed to reach every single world you said. When midnight came, he refreshed his screen and clicked on your video. The background image was a picture of you looking in a mirror with messy hair. You had digitally added sparkly, purple tears to run down the still image of your face. You played a couple notes on the piano before the lyrics appeared beside your face in your handwriting.
“I wish you’d just put me out of my misery
You already know I’m at your mercy
I don’t know why you’re dragging this out
You have all the power, if that’s what this is about
I’m not gonna be the one who walks away
So I need you to say what you want to say
I already know it’s over so just let it end
Please don’t give me the pity of asking to stay friends.”
“I don’t think we should be listening to this.” Sam said as he paused the video.
“Play it.” Tom demanded. Sam sighed and pressed play while the other exchanged looks.
“I’ve been feeling you leaving
I hate this part more than the ending
The moments leading up when I know your heart has changed
I don’t know why we keep pretending
If it’s done just say it’s done
Don’t just change your mind and not tell me
I already know so just let me go
Don’t just watch as I sit and bleed.”
“I don’t think-“ Sam began as he paused it again.
“Stop pausing it.” Tom cut him off. “Play it. I need to hear it.”
Sam pressed play again and Tom pulled the laptop over to himself so he could control it.
“Cause I cut my hand on that first crack in the glass
I feel the icy air between us when you pass me
So I took your chain off from around my neck
I’ll think of something else your initial can stand for
You don’t deserve to see me wearing it anyway
You don’t know me anymore.”
Tom didn’t realize he had started to cry until his tears his his keyboard. He couldn’t see the video anymore from his blurry his eyes had gotten. He wiped his face and leaned on his hands to give the song better attention.
“You know I would die for you in secret
Like that song I showed you in my car
I don’t think you even listened to it
You didn’t draw stars around my scars
You drew your arrow and let it fly
Right into my heart and let me die
Actually, I wish that was the curtesy you provided
Instead, you let this love become one sided
And now we’re shattered like a glass that was dropped
You broke my heart until the day that it stopped
You never got down on knee
Even when I crumbled onto both of mine
I wonder if you ever really wanted me
How did you think we were fine?
And at what part did you realize you liked the idea of me?
But who I actually am isn’t someone you wanted
I miss who I was before we met
Now I can’t go back, I’m haunted
And you were right not to marry me
If I could walk away from me too, I would
You were right to leave when you did
I know I would too if I could
But I’m stuck here with myself
Forever scratching and clawing at your door
Keep it all, even my memories
You’re lucky you don’t know me anymore.”
Everyone sat in silence once the song ended. Tom wiped his eyes again but tears just kept falling down his face.
“That probably wasn’t even about you.” Harrison said after a long beat of silence. Tom gave him a look before turning to his brothers.
“What do you think?” He asked Harry.
“It sounds like she’s hurting too.” Harry shrugged. “I think you’re both waiting for the other to say you’re broken up.”
“Well I’m not saying it.” Tom stated. “She has to.”
“And if she doesn’t?” Sam asked kindly.
“Then we don’t break up.”
“Again, I’m not really sure that’s how it works.”
“Well it’s what I’m going with. Because I can’t break up with her.” Tom sniffled and shut the laptop.
“But you can’t go on like this either.” Sam pointed out.
“She’ll come home when she’s ready.” Tom said, but no one in the room believed him.
And didn’t come home for a while.
After another week of silence, Tom flew to New York to see you. He got to your apartment and knocked on your door without any particular plan in mind. You opened it with a smile but when you saw who it was, you tensed up.
“Hi.” He said with a sad smile.
“If you came to to propose to me as some kind of grand gesture-“
“Please, let me talk.” He cut you off. You sighed and nodded as you leaned against your doorway.
“We have different opinions. But I don’t love or respect anyone more than you. So I am willing to hear your side, which is not something I did last time we spoke about this. I was just listening for what I could rebuttal against. I wasn’t actually listening to understand your thoughts and feelings. But I’m ready now.” He said. You nodded again and seemed to drop the wall that you had put up.
“It matters to me that we get married.” You told him. “I know you think it’s pointless and doesn’t change anything, but it changes things for me. If you picked out a ring, asked my parents permission, and got down on one knee, that would all make me feel special and loved. Those things matter to me in a relationship.”
“Okay. I’m sorry. I didn’t know that.”
“But now you do know so if you propose, I know you’re just gonna do it to appease me. I’ll always know that you think it’s stupid when I look at the ring.”
“I admit that it found it a little dumb in the past. But it matters to you. And nothing that matters to you can be stupid.”
“I can’t get married to you knowing you don’t really want it. It’s not fair to you and it’s not fair to me.” You said and went to close the door.
“But I can’t lose you. My thoughts on marriage literally do not matter to me in the slightest. If it’s important to you and if it is what it takes to make you feel special and loved, then I want it too.” Tom pleaded as he pushed your door back open.
“But you don’t want it. You just don’t want to break up.”
“I can put on a tux for a night and suffer through if it means that much to you.” He said with a slight laugh to lighten the mood. Your face changed and he had somehow made the situation worse.
“Suffer?” You asked quietly with a told of your head.
“I’m sorry. That was a poor choice of words. But darling, I’m saying we can get married. I’ll do whatever it is you want. Why do you still look so upset?”
“Because you don’t get it.” You shook your head. “And I’m afraid you never will.”
“What don’t I get? I don’t understand. I’m telling you I’ll give you what you want.”
“But you don’t want it too. That’s what I’m trying to say. It’s the principle, Tom. Remember how disappointed I was that one time when I said I wanted ice cream so we went to the shop but you didn’t get anything? I didn’t mean I wanted ice cream. I meant I wanted us to get ice cream together so we could eat it and spend time together. This is like that but times a million. You can’t compromise on marriage. You either believe in it or you don’t. So even if we did get married, it wouldn’t mean to you what it means to me. I would always think back to that conversation we had and remember how you really feel about marriage. I keep replaying all the things you said that day in my head. We both know how you feel about marriage and we both know it’s not something you want.”
“So that one conversation ruined it for you? Completely?” He asked.
“Yes, it did.” You answered truthfully. You stared at each other for a minute as both your eyes welled with tears. You both knew you’d reached a stalemate and there was nothing more to be done.
“So what do we do now?” Tom asked without looking at you.
“I love you. More than I’ve ever loved anyone.” You told him, making him perk up.
“So do I.” He smiled as tears rolled down his face.
“But what if that’s not enough?” You asked him. Tom froze and felt the situation escaping from him fast.
“We’ve been together almost 5 years, darling. That’s five birthdays, Christmas’s, anniversaries. You make up so much of my life. We’re exactly right for each other. It’s supposed to be you and me in the end. I can’t do this with anyone else.”
“And I can’t do this with you.” You laughed sadly and gestured to him. Tom’s heart dropped in his chest when it became apparent that this was more than just a fight.
“Are you breaking up with me?”
“I think I am.” You nodded. Neither of you could believe the words that were coming out of your mouth but it was too late to take them back.
“Does marriage really mean that much to you that you’d rather break up instead of just living a long, happy life together?” Tom asked you.
“I guess it does.” You realized. He stood there in shock as you put a hand on his shoulder and brought him closer to kiss his cheek.
“Goodbye, Tom.” You smiled sadly at him and shut your door.
Another month went by and you did not come home. You busied yourself with your music and dove into your next album, but that didn’t stop you from thinking about him on midnights when you were left alone with your thoughts. Tom thought about you a lot more often, like every time he saw your face on his TV. He tuned in one night to watch you debut your latest music video of your newest song. His eyes were glued to the TV as the video opened with your back to some brown eyed actor.
“You say “I don’t understand” and “I say I know you don’t.” We thought a cure would come through in time, now I fear it won’t.” You sang with your eyes glued to the floor. The setting changed and you were walking through an apartment that Tom recognized.
“She filmed this on Cornelia Street?” Tom whispered to himself and sat back on his couch.
“Remember lookin' at this room, we loved it 'cause of the light.” A smiling version of you sang as she walked though the apartment holding the hand of the actor playing Tom. The setting changed again and you were still in the room, but the lights were off and you were sitting alone in the floor.
“Now, I just sit in the dark and wonder if it's time.” You sang while not looking in the camera. The rest of the video followed in suit. You flashed between happy, golden hued memories with the actor to grey toned solo shots of you sitting alone at your piano or on the floor. The difference in the moods made Tom reminisce on the old times and he wondered how long it has been since he had made you smile the way you were doing in the video.
“Stop, you’re losing me. Stop, stop, stop. You’re losing me.” You sang while looking directly into the camera as a purple heart monitor line ran through the background behind you and eventually flatlined. Tom felt like you were staring right into his soul and realized this was the closest he’d gotten to making eye contact with you in a while. He watched the sad, grey version of yourself split from the happy version and suddenly, there were two of you on the screen while the actor playing Tom ignored them both.
“How long can we be a sad song till we were too far gone to bring back to life?” The both of you sang while Tom’s counterpart read the newspaper and didn’t look at either. He thought of the days leading up to you leaving for New York where he’d be doing exactly that, reading the newspaper to pretend to look busy when he felt you glaring at him. He wiped his face and watched as the scene changed to the three of you at a party. The sad version of you was clinging to Tom’s counterpart defensively while the other version of you yelled at him with a drink in your hand.
“Fighting in only your army. Front lines, don’t you ignore me. I’m the best thing as this party.” You yelled and drunkenly stumbled around while the rest of the party watched.
“You’re losing me.” The grey version whispered into Tom’s ear. He assumed that version represented the part of you that missed him while the other version represented the you that knew it was over. The scene changed again and this time, you were back in the Cornelia Street apartment with an open ring box in the center of the table. There was no ring inside, just a burning flame.
“And I wouldn’t marry me either. A pathological people pleaser.Who only wanted you to see her.” You said into the camera while Tom’s character threw things into a bag behind you and went to leave.
“And I’m fading thinking do something babe! Say something! Lose something, babe. Risk something. You’re losing me! Chose something, babe. I got nothing to believe unless you’re choosing me.” The grey version of you desperately said to Tom’s counterpart as she pulled on his arm to beg him to stay. It was like he couldn’t see her at all and just kept walking towards the door. The golden version of yourself opened the door and pointed for him to get out while the other version of you jumped in front of him and dropped to her knees to get him to stay. Tom’s character walked right through her and she faded to dust, leaving just the one version of yourself to watch him go. The music stopped and you ended up running after him, but he was already gone. You turned and ran down Cornelia Street but didn’t go back into your apartment. You just kept running down the street and turned the block so that the camera couldn’t see you anymore. The camera panned out to show the Cornelia Street sign and a violin version of your song by the same name played in the background as the street sign turned grey and faded into dust. The screen turned black and Tom was left alone in the silence.
After another month, he found himself outside your door again. He knocked on it and felt his heart pound until you opened it up.
“Tom? What are you doing here?”
“I’m here for you. I came to fix this.” He said simply.
“Tom, I don’t know that we can fix this.” You said apologetically. It felt amazing to see him, but it didn’t change the fact that you ultimately wanted different things in life.
“You were right. You can’t compromise on marriage. And you either believe in it or you don’t.” He began before getting down on one knee.
“Tom?” You asked skeptically as your eyes went wide. He pulled a ring box out of his pocket and opened it up for you.
“It’s your moms ring. Your dad gave it to her for the third Valentine’s Day they celebrated together in college. She doesn’t wear it anymore because it’s one size too small, so she gave it to me when I asked them for permission to marry you.”
“You asked them?” You smiled in surprise that he had done one of the things you said mattered to you.
“I did. It was a little awkward to find out your mother already knew all about our previous conversations about marriage so you can probably guess how confused I was.” He said with an embarrassed laugh.
“What did my dad say?”
“He said as long as I make you happy, he’s proud to have me join the family.”
“See? No one’s giving me away to anyone. We’re just creating a bigger family for the two of us.”
“I see that now. I see a lot of the points you made. And what your dad said got me thinking.”
“About?”
“All I want is to make you happy. Which is different from agreeing to things I don’t want to do to appease you. I do want to watch you walk down the aisle in a dress that’s been in your Pinterest board since you were 13. I do want to plan the seating arrangement and introduce my weird friends from college to your weird friends from college. I want to plan the entire thing because that’s something we can do together, and those are my favorite things to do.”
“What about the ceremony? And the marriage license? You don’t want those things.”
“I didn’t at first.” He admitted. “But after actually thinking about it and reevaluating the opinion I formed before I ever even had a serious relationship, I realized I feel differently. You make me feel differently. I would proudly sign my name next to yours on a marriage license. Because I happen to think our names look pretty good together. And as for the ceremony, I know we can’t compromise, but we can collaborate. It doesn’t have to be a huge blowout party. It can be the best elements of the both of us. And we can plan it together.”
“That all sounds very lovely, but it doesn’t change the fact that you didn’t believe in marriage just a few months ago. Am I really supposed to believe you’ve truly changed your mind? What if this is just some grand gesture to win me back that you end up regretting?” You asked him.
“I will never end up regretting promising my love for you in front of our family and friends. I’ll never regret hyphenating our names so that everyone knows I’m a part of a duo. I’ll never regret choosing to legally attach myself to my vets friend and spend the rest of my life with her. But I can tell you with the utmost assurance that I would regret letting you walk away and become a name I wince at for the rest of my life.”
“You felt differently not too long ago.” You quietly reminded him. You wanted so badly to believe him, but you couldn’t fully trust it.
“I changed my mind. I realized somethings are more important than other things. And that you’re more important than anything.”
Your skeptical expression turned into a coy smile as you slid your hand into the one that wasn’t holding the open ring box.
“You never actually said the words.” You told him, making Tom break into a relieved smile.
“Darling, would you make me the happiest man-“
“Eh. Try again. Too cliche.” You cut him off. Tom smiled and shook his head, knowing you weren’t gonna make it easy.
“My love, I don’t want to spend another minute as just your boyfriend.” He tried again.
“Lame. Thumbs down.” You shook your head and pointed your thumb down.
“Would you do me the honor-“
“Yawn.” You interrupted.
“Will you just marry me, you annoying brat?” Tom groaned.
“Tom! I thought you’d never ask!” You gushed over dramatically and put your hand over your heart.
“Is that a yes?” Tom asked as he stood up.
“I have to think about it. I don’t know if marriage is for me.” You shrugged as he slid the ring onto your finger. You looked down at the ring and remembered the time you tried it on as a little girl and how it didn’t fit your finger until now.
“Yes. I will marry you.” You smiled as you looked back up at Tom. Tom broke into a grin and scooped you up to spin you around.
“Sorry I wrote all those emo songs about you.” You said into his ear, making him laugh.
“It’s okay. It’s what you do.” He couldn’t stop smiling as he set you down. He then pulled you in for a long kiss to make up for all the time you were apart. When you pulled away, he pulled your face back towards him with his hands to kiss your left cheek.
“I see you.” He said, then kissed you right cheek.
“I choose you.” He continued, then kissed your forehead.
“I love you.” He said, the kissed your nose before looking into your eyes.
“And I know you.” He told you. You smiled softly and nodded your head.
“You do?” You asked him. “You really know me?”
“I do.”
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whomst-the-hell · 2 years
Text
The babysitters’ club, as the older members of the upside down crew have dubbed themselves, meet at least once a week. Sometimes it’s only a few hours, just long enough to watch a movie together, to confirm that everyone is still alive and coping. Sometimes it’s all night, and Argyle plies them all with good California weed while they attempt to work through their collective truckloads of trauma.
Sometimes, like tonight, they spend it goofing off and having fun like the dumb kids many of them couldn’t afford to be.
They’re gathered in a circle at the Harrington mansion, deserted as always, playing truth or dare. Nancy has just admitted to smoking weed in her freshman year, in the drama room with Barbara Holland, and she has set her know it all, meddling, journalist eyes on Eddie.
“Truth or dare,” she asks, a challenge clear on her face.
Eddie knows that, with most people, picking truth may be seen as the cowardly option. With Nancy, that couldn’t be more wrong. If he picks dare, he will be safe, but he will be mocked relentlessly by every single person in the room.
“Truth,” he sighs reluctantly.
“Who-” she pauses dramatically for effect, a theatrical detail that Eddie honestly respects, even if it fills him with dread, “-was your most embarrassing crush! And it has to be a person we know, no celebrities allowed!”
Shit.
He feels his eyes dart to Steve. Nancy smirks. Bitch. He can’t even lie about it then.
Time to face the music, he supposes mournfully.
“I would like to say, for the record, that I was in junior year, ok. And, in retrospect, with the knowledge I have now, it’s not even that bad, but at the time-“
“Spit it out, Munson,” says Robin, the fucking traitor.
“IhadacrushonSteve,” he says, all in one breath.
“What was that, dude, I didn’t catch it?” Argyle says, voice mellow. Eddie honestly doesn’t know if he’s in on this or not, but he glowers all the same.
Face red, he repeats, “I had a crush on Steve.” He resolutely does not look at Steve.
“No you didn’t!” Steve responds, immediately, aghast.
Eddie can feel his heart tearing in two.
“Don’t get your panties in a twist, Harrington, this was years ag-“
“You literally rejected me!”
Fucking what.
He knows he must look ridiculous right now, mouth hanging open, cheeks still red with embarrassment, but he does not have the capacity to care.
“Wh- what do you- huh?” he finally manages.
“When you were in junior year, and I was a sophomore? We were lab partners-“
And ohhh, hadn’t that just been sweet, sweet torture. Pretty, perfect Harrington had had to sit next to him all semester, where Eddie could see his freckles and smell his cologne, but-
“You spent the whole semester making fun of me!”
“What the fuck are you talking about, man?” says Steve, eyebrows furrowed in that way he does that makes Eddie want to kiss his forehead and- Fucking focus, Munson.
“You always used to make passive aggressive comments about my clothes, or my hair, or my books or whatever!”
Steve buries his face in his hands and groans.
“I wasn’t being passive aggressive.”
“You- what the fuck do you mean, you weren’t being passive aggressive! Why else would you have said any of that shit?”
“Because I meant it?”
Because he- what? Eddie played back as many of their interactions from that year as he could remember. I like your jacket, Steve had said when Eddie had started putting patches on his denim vest. Your hair looks nice today, he had said when Eddie had tied it back to beat the heat. Oh, that sounds interesting, when Eddie described the plot of the book he was reading.
“Oh my god, you were flirting with me.”
“No shit! I once told you you had really pretty eyes!“
“I thought you were bullying me!”
“How on Earth could ‘I think you have really pretty eyes’ be bullying?”
“I don’t know! It made more sense than it being flirting!”
“I asked you to go to the drive in with me! That is the most classic first date in the book!”
Holy shit, Steve Harrington had asked him out. Steve Harrington had asked him out and he’d said no. This was the worst day of Eddie’s life.
His face must have looked some kind of way, because Steve just groaned again. He sat there for a second before peeking up from behind his hands, a move that should not have been as cute as it was, what the fuck.
“If I tried again now, would you still think I was bullying you.”
Holy shit did Steve Harrington want to date him? This had to be a trick or a prank or something, right?
Except that he’d thought that in junior year as well, and apparently it had cost him a boyfriend, so.
“No- nope, I would definitely pick up on it, uh huh. Definitely,” he said in a rush. God, he was normally so good with words, fuck.
Steve emerged fully from his hands, face pink but expression determined.
“Eddie Munson, would you like to go to the drive in with me? They’re playing Jaws next saturday and I’d love to watch it with you.”
“Absolutely, Stevie. It’s a date.”
There are groans from the rest of their friends as they rifle through their pockets, each passing money to a very smug looking Nancy.
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overtake · 3 months
Text
Was on a train from Berlin to Amsterdam after Euro quarters and thought what if backpacking Daniel (late 20s, mild crisis about what he wants from life has led to him bumming around Europe) and football fanatic Max (just finished university, his teaching job begins next school term) were also on a train from Berlin to Amsterdam after Euro quarters
Daniel’s greasy curls are matted against his oily face and he can still catch pungent whiffs of last night's nauseating adventures, despite the two showers with gritty bars of hotel soap he’d taken before running for this train. His hair has dried down gross and stringy, crushed against the hood of the jumper he should not need in July. Suffice it to say, he is not looking nor feeling his best, and it manifests in his arms trembling as they weakly attempt to throw his oversized duffle bag onto the train rack.
“Jesus fuck,” he mutters. He’s never been this hungover in his life, probably. His mouth tastes like stale beer and his eyes feel like sandpaper, and he’d really like his body to stop shaking.
“Do you need help?” A voice says from behind him, sounding lightly amused at his suffering. He turns — too quickly, very bad idea for his dizziness — to see a guy around his height but twice as broad, an orange Dutch national team kit stretched tight across his wide shoulders and showing off the round shape of his soft chest. There’s remnants of last night’s face paint still on edges of his cheekbones, the heavily smeared lines vaguely resembling what was once Holland’s flag. Blond-brown hair pokes out the edges of a garish bucket hat, and a crowd of friends in their own patriotic attire behind him are observing them with interest.
How these guys escaped the Euros viewing less fucked up than an Australian watching the sport for the first time is beyond Daniel’s comprehension, but he’s too grateful for the assistance to do much more than grunt an assent and thank you as the guy reaches up and pushes Daniel’s bag up the final few centimetres.
Daniel heaves out a grateful breath and collapses into the open seat below his settled bag, prepared to curl up against the window and contemplate all his life decisions on the six hour train journey and attempt to not spew in a public and embarrassing manner.
Dutch guy glances over at his friends, who have taken up three of the four seats at a table, and then, insanely and without invitation, seats himself right next to Daniel.
“Big night last night?”
Daniel stares at him for half a second, trying to make his brain come online enough to form words. “Uh, yeah. Was in the fan zone. Don’t think I stopped drinking until two hours ago.”
The guy offers him a big, crinkly smile. “Oh, same. Haven’t slept yet.”
“How are you so put together?” Daniel asks. He grimaces as the train begins to move, throwing one arm over his eyes and squeezing them tightly shut until the motion sickness eases ever so slightly. “I’m going to die, I think.”
“Practice,” the guy says solemnly, patting Daniel’s shoulder sympathetically, then letting it linger for a few seconds longer. Oh. Oh. Daniel’s too hungover to even think about the movement involved in sex right now, but like, yeah. This guy is big and strong and hot, and he’s quietly pleased with himself that he can pull even looking and smelling like this.
“I might need some of your training,” he says, flashing a big smile and then remembering the food stuck between his teeth that he couldn’t get out with brushing, floss long lost in the depths of his hellhole bag. He purses his lips together quickly, trying to hide the evidence.
Hot Dutch boy doesn’t seem to notice anyway. He just pulls a water bottle from his blue backpack, propped carefully on the fine hair dusting his delicious thighs, and offers it to Daniel. There’s a fancy luggage tag on his bag, and Daniel steals a glance at the MEV spelled out in delicate gold letting. Very cute, him branding a cheap backpack like that. “Thirsty?”
“Very,” Daniel says, gratefully taking the bottle — opened, he notices, which means these little plastic coils have been sucked between the plush pink of this guy’s lips and rested against the cute freckle decorating the top one — and swallowing down a long gulp.
“I’m Max, by the way,” he says when Daniel is done drinking, careful to ensure his fingers brush against Daniel’s hand when he takes the water back. He’s not aiming for any subtly in his intentions, particularly not with the intense stare he’s directing at where Daniel licks the remaining droplets of water from around his mouth.
“Daniel,” he responds in kind. When Max has placed his water back into its pocket, he takes Max’s hand and pumps it dramatically. “Enchanté, Max.”
Max has long fingers, his nails short but well-groomed. They’re a sharp contrast to Daniel’s bitten stubs, the edges of his thumbs permanently red and half-bleeding. The dark hair of Max’s arms trails up to his hands, which are moisturized, strong, and big enough to wrap around the expanse of Daniel’s throat.
“Will you be staying in Amsterdam long?” Max asks.
Daniel shrugs, tapping one worn-down, stained Van against Max’s navy blue sneakers. “Dunno. I could be convinced to extend my trip if I had a good tour guide.”
He knows Max’s friends are listening in, can see them whispering and giggling and taking photos to probably send in a larger group chat, but he focuses his attention on Max’s pretty blue eyes and the way Max’s hand is still loosely holding his.
“I don’t actually live in Amsterdam,” Max admits. He bites at his lower lip, dragging it through his straight, pearly-white teeth. “But I don’t mind sticking around for a bit.”
One of Max’s entourage leans over, says something to Max in Dutch that sounds like a protest, but a dark-haired boy slaps him in the stomach to shut him up and rolls his eyes at Daniel as if to apologize for his friend’s behaviour.
“You can rent a car and drive yourselves back,” Max snaps at him in English, then turns his soft attention back to Daniel. “So, tour guide. I better work on a good list while you sleep.”
Daniel drops his head down to Max’s shoulder, already making a plan for how he can casually rearrange his body to end up with his head on those plush thighs. “I guess we should find a few things to do around the city while the cleaners replace our sheets, yeah.”
Max laughs. “Do you enjoy football? We can go out and watch semis together, maybe.”
“To be honest, I’d never watched before,” Daniel admits. “I’m mostly into UFC. I just thought it seemed like a good time.”
Max brushes his fingers through Daniel’s gross hair as if it’s something soft and precious. “I’ll explain it all to you. It’s really such a good sport. Do you know anything about English football? Virgil plays for Liverpool.”
He’s off after that, explaining leagues and players and rules to Daniel, doing all these cute hand gestures and making himself laugh with all his little jokes. Daniel doesn’t even mind that he can’t drift off to sleep. He’s content listening to the rumble of Max’s voice, steady like the movement of the train, as he curls himself up into a tiny ball to rest his cheek on the smooth, pale skin spreading out of Max’s terrible khaki shorts.
He thinks he’ll like Amsterdam.
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