#Hopefully this answered most of your questions about the thought I've put into it at least haha ♪

[vargaslovinghours]

Gosh I am so in love with the dating sim idea <33

Partially because I'm interested in computer programming and partially because, like, the ✨dynamics✨ man!!

The idea of Scriabin internally struggling between "I don't *hate* this person" and "This person trying to steal Edgar from me >:0" is just asdf-

What type of endings would there be?

Could you befriend one/both and not go as far as dating?

Could you date both?

Also love love love the UI concept art so much like the yarn-themed dialogue box and hearts system is so creative aaa

Sorry if this is a lot of questions just <333 going feral over this concept <33

Haha no no, no problem at all ♪ We’re both on the same page here, I love the design side of games, backend stuff is super fascinating to me ♫ Plus I just super love the idea of them in a Dating Sim ah ♥

It sounds like a whole heap’a your questions are answered in my first post in the Dating Sim tag :D

However, since I have The Most fun imagining what it’d be like to write/play a Vargas Dating Sim, I will take this opportunity to talk about it more lol:

As you can see in the Endings flow chart, yes, there are a bunch of different endings, all based on the ✨dynamics✨ that the Player pursues with each of the Vargases. In my current draft there’s not a way to date both exactly - at least, you can’t date both behind the other’s back, they will always be generally aware of the relationship status the other has with the Player, Scriabin moreso than Edgar, but Scriabin can’t help but gloat and they talk in their own scenes, so Edgar still knows. You can positively pursue both of them though, which leads to its own ending!

(You can keep both of them at ~5 ♥s and under, but that will still culminate in the Neutral Ending; at least one of them has to be at 7+ ♥s to get a different Positive ending; so, yes but no but also yes??)

You can also deepen your relationship with one over the other! Those, of course, lead to the Bad and Worst Endings, who could’ve guessed :3c Those are some of my favourites, because who’s “Bad” ending it is really depends on the perspective - the Bad (Edgar) Ending is one of Scriabin’s better Endings, as far as his manipulation and possessiveness is concerned. It’s definitely a Bad Ending for the Player tho lol

While the Best Ending doesn’t get as messed up as the Bad Endings (I mean - ideally lol), there is still definitely a lot of tumultuous emotions! They have to share the Player with each other, and each other with the Player, at least to better get to know each other! Scriabin isn’t the only one who feels possessive, even in routes where the player gets closer to Edgar there are still a lot of mixed feelings about being away from Scriabin, even as he starts to get more violent. They’re always weird about each other, they’re the ultimate package deal! 💕

[countrymusiclover]

2 - Coffee Thank You

Part 3

Detective Stabler's Daughter

Tag list - send an ask to be added @hiireadstuff

It had been a few weeks since I started my classes and I was doing fairly well in them except for the newest assignment in Professor Reid’s class. Kathleen wasn’t really concerned with the class like I was. Re-reading over the notes I had taken I had zoned out the fact that he had ended class for the afternoon and everyone else was leaving until my sister shakes my shoulder. “Hey! Hey Y/n. Class is over.” 

“It is. Uh sorry.” I looked at her, noticing that she had her backpack on her shoulders standing in front of me. 

I glanced back down at my messy notebook. “Hey, I'll meet you later. I have some questions to ask the professor.” 

“Okay. Hopefully you won’t come off as a serious college student in your last year.”

I sent her a glare. “Kathleen.”

“I just want to have some fun with my sister.” She walked down the aisle and out the large door. 

Walking down the rows until I reached his desk he was putting his notebook away in his bag getting ready to leave. “Professor Reid, could I ask you some questions about our newest assignment?” 

“Of course.” He set his bag down back on the large desk. “What are your questions?” 

Sitting my bag down on the ground tile I scanned over the questions I had written down. “I’ve been looking over the assignment but I don’t understand how we are supposed to profile these past cases.” 

“Being a profile isn’t easy. But let’s look at the situation I gave you.” He suggested eyeing my papers. 

I nervously nodded, handing him my papers. “Okay.” 

“The situation reads : A man abducted three blonde girls and held them captive in a basement. He forced these girls to have sex with him and if they refused he held them down and he used a medication to make them go blind as punishment.” He read over the assignment description. “Tell me your thoughts on why this guy chose this punishment or what type of pattern this would fall under.” 

I clicked my tongue avoiding his gaze since I was nervous that I might be wrong. “The reason for punishment was that he wanted to be in control of the girls and if they didn’t find attraction towards him then - he used it to make them feel the pain he felt.” 

“And what do you think the trigger was?” Professor Reid asked me. 

Brushing hair out of my face I paused for a few minutes before answering him. “The trigger likely could have been that he had a girlfriend or a girl he was interested in that looked like the girls. And she rejected him, not finding him attractive.” 

“Exactly. You’re exactly right.” He smiled at me. 

I raised a brow. “Really?” 

“Yes. Now if you just write all that down and bring it on the day it’s due. You’ll get a good grade.” He cheered me on handing my notes back to me. 

I took it from his outstretched hand. “Thank you, Professor Reid.” 

“You’re welcome, Ms. Stabler.” He swings his bag over his left shoulder heading towards the doors. “I’ll see you in class.”

“Wait. Professor Reid, how can I thank you - um more properly.” 

He paused in his steps. “Oh I don’t think that is necessary.” 

“Well I think I should do something. Considering most of the professor's that I've had aren't always open to questions and have told me that I should be able to figure it out on my own.” I explained to him putting my notebook back up and shrugging my bag over my shoulders. 

My professor clicked his tongue. “Well I suppose it's okay. Just nothing too serious.” 

“How about going for coffee near campus?” I suggested with a slight smirk on my face. 

He finally agreed to that idea. “That's good.” 

We made our way across the campus just silently walking until we passed the entrance sign of the campus. His class was my last one on Thursday’s so I was done for the evening. It was a nice day when we reached the nearest shop where he held the door open for me to go in first like a gentleman. “Thank you.” 

“No problem. Ms. Stabler.” He replied following behind me where we sat down at the nearest round table. 

“One Strawberry Creme Frappuccino for you, Ms. Stabler. And a White Chocolate Mocha for me.” Spencer came back with two drinks in hand since I had told him what I wanted. He sat back down in his chair across from mine. 

I sat across from him hanging my bag on the back part, correcting him in the nicest way possible. “You should call - can call me Y/n if we go out for coffee like this again. I mean only if you want to.” 

“You’d want to go out for coffee again?” 

I sipped my coffee cup. “Maybe. Unless that’s super unprofessional in our situation.” 

“It’s more than that.” He tapped his fingers on the sides of the plastic cup. 

Taking a long sip from my coffee I wasn’t sure what had come over me. Yet I didn’t feel that nervous around him. “What do you mean?” 

“I can’t entirely understand how I feel about you. But I just - I think that I want to know more about you.”

Tilting my head to the side my curiosity came over me. “Like wanting to go on a date type of thing?” 

“Y-yeah. Only if you’re up for it.” He rubbed the back of his neck.

“Hmm let’s see. Tell me something most people wouldn’t know about you just by looking at you.” 

Spencer thought briefly for a second tapping his fingers on the table before snapping his fingers at me. “I’m banned from casinos in Las Vegas, Laughlin and Pahrump because of my card counting ability.” 

“Woah. You really must be a genius.” 

He sent me a shy smile. “I graduated high school at the age of 12.” 

“That is incredible. And please don’t take offense to this but how do you not have a girlfriend or wife already?” 

He shrugged his shoulders, finishing the rest of his drink in his cup before sitting it down on the table avoiding my gaze waiting for my response. “Typically I haven’t been the best at talking to other people. I um - I feel like I always come off as weird or awkward talking to women  - which is way too personal when we haven’t even been on a date yet.” 

“One thing about me is that I am a Detective’s daughter.” I clasped my hands together resting my chin on the palms of my hands. 

Spencer raised a brow at me. “Can I know the detective's name? Unless that’s too invasive.” 

“Pfft it’s totally fine. My father’s name is Detective Elliot Stabler. He works for the Special Victims Unit here in the city.” 

He chuckled softly. “I already told you this in class but I do work for the FBI. Specifically the Behavioral Analysis Unit.” 

“That’s pretty impressive.” I smiled back at him. 

Spencer met my gaze with his brown eyes that deeply looked into mine when he asked the question that popped into his head and was making him super nervous on the inside. “At the risk of overstepping you can decline. But uh - would you maybe wanna go out with me tonight?” 

“We’d have to go off campus. But yes that sounds like fun.” I finished off my coffee throwing both of our drinks away then we headed back to the campus. 

Comments really appreciated ❤️

[lola-bunn1]

❥ a/n: saw a lot of people going around tumblr with this idea so i thought i'd give it a try! hopefully this doesn't suck ok bye

Toruk Makto is a mighty warrior, he was known across the entirety of Pandora. A lot of women saw him as a fine young man, so why out of all of them, you were the one eywa picked.

He had come over with Tsu'tey to see you, Tsu'tey told him about you and how the olo'eyktan needed a woman with him and spoke highly of you.

You sat with them quietly until your mother finally broke the news right in front of them

"No! I do not like him! I cannot just-"

"Y/n! Have some respect, he is olo'eyktan. You should be grateful."

You looked to him and he just looked away, you shook your head and left, ignoring your mother's calling.

You didn't want any of this. You wanted to fall in love, choose a mate that also wanted you. You wanted to find a mate in your own time, what did you do so eywa can do this to you?

You heard footsteps behind you, you quickly turned, pulling your knife out in defense

"Whoa there" It was none other than Jake, raising his hands up, "Relax, it's just me"

"I do not want to talk to you" You sighed and sat back down

He sat next to you, "Look, I know this isn't exactly ideal to you. It isn't to me either, I didn't even know I needed a mate. Thought I would just be...whatever, you know?"

"What does be whatever mean?" You questioned, reminding him of the fact that you don't share the same lingo

"I mean...like I would just be there, without having to find a mate or something, just live my life" He explained and you sighed

A moment of silence filled your ears

"I thought that too..." You spoke, "I wanted to find a mate...but on my own terms."

"Alright, listen" He said and looked into his eyes, "I know you don't like me and no offense but I share the same feeling, so we can just...live. We don't actually have to like each other, you get it?"

You nodded

A few days later, you got married. The two of you haven't mated, just got married.

It was hard. When he first talked to you that day, when he was being understanding of your feelings, you thought something could work. But after the second you got married, it felt you were a box he checked off his list.

He was never home, he barely talked to you, you were at Tsahik training most of the time. But whenever you were both true, he would still avoid you.

You were in a loveless marriage and it sucked, it sucked and it hurts.

Not just that, but there were rumors, rumors of him and Neytiri. That he loved her, and he was chasing after a mated woman.

So to sum it up, not only were you in a loveless marriage. But you were also in a loveless marriage with an unfaithful husband, you hated the moment you agreed to marry him.

The hope you had for this marriage to work was gone. He acted as if you didn't exist, so you do the same. You focused on your Tsahik training, you hung out with your friends more often, you did your own thing.

One day, you came home late to see him sitting there, waiting for you. You ignored him and put your stuff away

"Where were you" He said, not even bothering to look at you

You didn't answer and began making dinner

"I'm talking to you"

You ignored him again and went to get the food but he grabbed your wrist and turned you to him

"Answer me" He said sternly

"I was out in the forest with my friends" You said, pushing his arm away and going back to doing your thing

"That's it? You're not gonna say anything? I've been waiting here for hours"

"Oh you've been waiting for hours?!" You yelled, turning back to him, "I've been waiting for weeks! Weeks, Jake! You're never home, you don't talk to me, you act as if I am not there but the second I do something wrong you act like the victim?!"

He went quiet

You sighed and wrapped the food before you felt arms around your waist, you pushed them away and turned to him, seeing the look in his eyes

"I'm sorry" He said in a sincere tone, "I'll do better, I promise, baby."

You blinked at the nickname, and slowly put his arms around you again, and went back to making the food

You two had dinner together, talking about what you did that day, you updated him on your training, and he updated you on his. As you two talked, light touches were shared, and went you went to sleep, you fell asleep in each others arms

You began letting your guard down, something you've never done. You saw each other more often, you actually acted like yourself around him and he enjoyed it, you would go out at night in the forest, watching the stars together, joking together, laughs echoing through the forest

You had never felt this sort of connection with anyone, he made you feel comfortable, safe, you liked being around him, you were no longer married to a stranger

That was until you were at Tsahik training, on your way there, you heard mutters and mumbles, one of your friends suddenly stopped you.

"What's going on?" You asked

How could you be so stupid.

Later that day, you were at home, making some beads for your hair in silence, you felt lips to your cheeks before you moved away, Jake looked at you in confusion, leaning down to kiss your cheek again before you moved once again

"How was your day?" He asked you, dismissing what you did, you didn't answer

He was about to speak again before he heard a sniffle, his eyes widened

"Hey..." He said, touching your shoulder before you pushed him away and got up, turning to him

"Do not touch me, Jake Sully!" You yelled, his eyes softened at your sight, he had never seen you cry, you were a very tough person

"What's wrong?" He asked

"I do not know how I was so foolish to fall for your tricks"

"What's going on?" He asked again

"I should've known better than to marry a man who was after another woman."

"Wait...what?" He asked

"Why did you marry me, Jake Sully?" You asked

"I..."

"You married me to make Neytiri jealous, didn't you?!"

"Hey-no"

"I should've known" You fell on your knees, sobbing, he rushed to comfort you but you tried pushing him away

He grabbed your face, you put your hands on his wrists

"Listen to me, please" He spoke, wiping your tears, "I...I did like her, alright? But that was in the past! I don't like her anymore"

"Just leave me alone..." You sighed

"No-"

"You were right, Jake Sully. We do not have to like each other, we can be married without having that-"

"But I don't want that!" He yelled, "I lied, okay? I like you I...what's that thing, oh yes- I see you. I see you, y/n please listen to me"

"You do?" You said

"I don't want Neytiri, I don't want anyone else, I just want you, y/n." He spoke, "Please tell me you see me too, please." He said, noticing your quiet state

"I see you too...Jake Sully" You said

He kissed you, feeling your soft lips against his, the two of you grabbed your braids, and looked to each other before finally bonding them

You felt each other, his heartbeat, your breath, everything

You touched foreheads, "I am with you now, ma Jake"

Good, because he never wants to let you go.

[20dollarlolita]

Hi friends,

it's absolutely okay to use disability aids if they help you, and you are allowed to be the one who decides if they will help you.

I spent Christmas in a non-weight-bearing cast, and a friend of mine suggested I use her backup wheelchair so that I didn't have to use crutches for the whole time. I was initially resistant, but I'm glad I got over it.

It made a huge difference. It allowed me to work my job with minimal accommodation, and allowed me to be independent outside of work. I was able to go out and shop for holiday presents. I could leave my house and not worry about if I was going to get too tired to move. It was better for my body, because I wasn't putting my entire body weight on one hip or leg. It helped me be treatment compliant, because I didn't have the constant temptation to put my foot down and put a bit of weight on it. It allowed me to carry things and shop on my own. I was able to work at my job, make sales, and earn commission. The only work-related things I needed help with was to have us move our office plant (whose name is Randal) and to get help carrying large or heavy boxes. My doctor had approved return-to-work paperwork that said I had to sit down for 75% of my shift, and with a wheelchair, I was easily able to do this without going on disability or medical leave.

Here's a collection of pictures of me, not being stuck on the couch in my house.

And people, both friends and customers, were so very weird about all of this.

A lot of people questioned if it was some kind of overkill, because many people who can't bear weight on one leg will use crutches or a kneeling scooter. Other people commented on how inconvenient is had to be, and how difficult things had to be when I was using a wheelchair.

And I realized that other people saw me, compared their level of ability to what they thought mine was, and decided that using a wheelchair was difficult and inconvenient. What I saw was what my level of ability would be without the wheelchair, and what it was with it. Carrying a drink wasn't doable via wheelchair, crutches, or kneeling scooter, but I'd be unable to carry a drink in the wheelchair and people would see it as a huge inconvenience. (BTW the answer is just to get boba at a place that seals the lids on, carry it in your lap, and punch the straw through once you're at a place where you can set it down. Boba lids are wheelchair-friendly).

I think people see "wheelchair" as the ultimate in disability, but for me it was freedom to take care of myself. People want to save using a wheelchair for when you absolutely cannot function without it, but you deserve to be happy and not just to function.

And the fact is, if people are unable to judge my disability aids by understanding the options to them, and if they're only able to judge my mobility aids by comparing their personal ability to how they'd feel using my mobility aid, then there's no way whatsoever that someone else can judge if I actually need it, or not. But I deserved to be using the thing that gave me the most freedom, impacted my life the least, and was the least damaging on my body.

Anyway, I've spent the morning trying to convince someone I know who broke their leg that using a wheelchair is better than staying at home on the couch. I'm not making a lot of progress with that, so hopefully I can make some progress with my friends on the internet who might be going through something. You deserve to be comfortable and happy, and not just to exist. If you do things that take care of your body, instead of hurting it by refusing to take the help that you need, you'll be able to function better. Wheelchair isn't a bad or dirty thing, and it doesn't have to be a means of last resort. You can use it if it helps you.

[canon-transgender-virgil]

ALRIGHT I HAVE SOME TIME SO LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS (also shut up i only noticed the typo when i was taking this screenshot-)

Okay, so I noticed a common theme in all the videos that orange (or Orange) is in: right after you see the color orange, you can see some form of shame or embarrassment in one of the characters.

Let me explain.

Let's take the flash card scene from Learning New Things About Ourselves.

As many people know, right when you see Logan crumple up the flashcard in his hand (like the upwards POV shot), you can see orange light coming from up the stairs. Many people (as I've pointed out, like, three times now) believe this to be the first time we see Orange show up.

Now, logically, many people take seeing the color orange show up when someone is visibly angry to mean that Orange is the representation of anger, but I think I disagree.

Look at Logan's face immediately after the flashcard hits Roman.

That's not anger. That face says a lot of things, but it doesn't say rage. It says, most notably, "I wish I hadn't done that".

AND! I can't believe I forgot about this but Logan literally says "I do regret throwing that paper at puppet Roman" in the Five Years Later episode! He says the words "I regret throwing the paper"!!

I'm going to get back to the Five Years Later video later but keep that in your mind.

I wouldn't put much thought into this if it was just a one off thing, but it's not - Logan's not even the only who exhibits this sort of behavior!

In Putting Others First, what is the first live action scene we see (that isn't the recap of course)?

That's orange. That is Thomas bathed in orange.

And again, Thomas may be angry here but this anger is mainly directed at himself for letting himself go to the wedding and not the callback!

Patton I feel is in the same boat, where he regrets or else is embarrassed by not being able to answer "Logan's" questions (for context here, Lilypadton's eyes are orange).

And then there's Working Through Intrusive Thoughts.

Logan was mad of course, but I think, once again, this is more so the regret of not putting his foot down earlier and making Thomas listen to him (hence the lashing out not thirty seconds before Thomas decides to abandon their plan).

Alright, on to a more solid bit of proof: the Five Years Later video.

There is a whole segment in this episode about C!Thomas and the other characters talking about their regrets.

Aside from the aforementioned Logan's regret of throwing the paper at Roman, there were some other notable reactions to this question:

Roman's regret of making Thomas go to the wedding in the first place (cementing my earlier point that that wasn't fully anger on Thomas's face but rather regret about the situation entirely) is a major one, but then there's Virgil's entire CVS receipt of a list (ranging from "boiled carrots" to "achieving consciousness" - mans is full of regret), to Roman's mirrored regret from Logan's about wishing he'd thrown something at Logan before Logan got the chance to throw the flashcard at him, to Janus's regret of "lack of attention to detail" (which, while unrelated to this discussion, I thought was an interesting point to make before the release of the season finale - hopefully we get to see more disguised Janus content in the finale? 👀👀 )

It's also interesting to note that in the Five Years Later video Remus is the only one who doesn't have any regrets about, you know, anything. That makes sense obviously in the context of who Remus is as a character but it also tracks that the one of the only characters who doesn't seem threatened or scared of the Orange Side has no regrets.

This is all I have for now, but if anyone would like to add on to this please do.

[sexymandescendant-archive]

MOVING BLOGS!

Hey everyone, Mod Bee here.

When I first started this blog, I had no idea what I was doing. I thought my silly little original post wouldn't get too big, and that I would be able to handle the scope of sharing all the awesome fanmade descendants, answering questions about the silly little universe I've helped create, and telling the story of Sexyman Descendants.

...Turns out that was WAY too much for me to handle. The sheer load of attention I was getting had me WAY too overwhelmed, and to be frank it made me super intimidated to revisit Sexyman Descendants in any form whatsoever. Which is a shame, because I miss these characters as much as you guys do :(

Now that I've taken a step back from the blog for a bit and have a grounded, clear head, I've decided to limit the scope immensely and start fresh. I'm starting a fresh blog over at @/sexymandescendants (aka, the old url for this blog) where I can hopefully interact with the Sexyman Descendants universe in a more healthy manner. It will mostly be RP-focused, but I'll most likely still be reblogging fanart and whatnot over there too if the opportunity ever arises.

I hope that one day I'll be able to revisit some of the more ambitious projects I've started and/or talked about on here (ie: an archive of fanmade descendants, a Discord server, etc), but for now I'm putting those plans on indefinite hiatus. They only contributed to my burnout with Sexyman Descendants, and it'll be best for my mental health if I leave those projects behind for now. Thank you for your understanding!

TLDR; this blog will be up as an archive, but all Sexyman Descendants activity from now on will be at @sexymandescendants. Hope to see y'all there!

[prepolyglot]

Langblr Reactivation Challenge

Hello everyone! As you may know I've created this challenge to help revive the langblr community. It's a three week challenge designed to get you back into learning languages and (hopefully) give you ideas on how to study and share your knowledge of them. It is completely optional to do, but try to reblog other people's posts if you aren't participating.

The challenge is designed to be done daily, however if you miss a day, you can go back and do it later or continue from where you left off. I do encourage you to do your best to keep up with the challenge though. Tag your posts with #langblr reactivation challenge so that others can find your posts.

If you have any questions, please send me an ask or a message and I'll do my best to answer it.

I'll put the prompts under a read more so this post isn't ridiculously long. Good luck to everyone participating! Remember the best way to promote the langblr revival is by reblogging other people's work.

Week 1

Day 1: Create an introduction post about yourself. What's your name? What languages are you studying? What languages do you hope to study? What do you hope you'll get out of this challenge? Add whatever else you’d like to your introduction post!

Day 2: Write a list of goals you have for your target languages. Make both long term and short term goals. An overall goal could be to have the ability to talk with native speakers with ease and a smaller goal would be to finally learn that difficult grammar point that's been plaguing you for ages. How will you achieve them?

Day 3: Create a list or a Mindmap of vocabulary topics. Start with a broad topic and narrow down to more specific topics. An example could be bedroom - furniture - closet - clothes or travelling - languages - study words - school supplies. Keep a hold of this because you'll use it later to create vocab to study. Some broad topics to start with: house, school, work, travelling, friends and family, nature, city. Feel free to use these or think of your own. Share your mindmap so others can get some ideas if they need it. Here are some mind map creation tools (x) (x) (x).

Day 4: Create a vocab list for one of the topics you created yesterday, if you want to make more, feel free to make as many as you like! Share your list and reblog other people's lists. And most importantly, make sure you study these words!

Day 5: Find a video in your target language and watch it as many times as you need to in order to understand it. Make a post about the video. What was it about? Did you like the video? Was it difficult to understand? Make sure you link the video. Try to write your answers in your target language, but if you can’t that’s okay!

Day 6: Look up 3 idioms in your target language and explain what they mean and how you use them in a sentence (with an example!).

Day 7: Send asks to other langblrs (bonus points if it's in a shared target language!) asking them about whatever (for example, ask how their day was, ask questions about their target languages, or share some of your thoughts with them). If you receive one, answer it! You can ask more than one person and it can be on or off anon.

Week 2

Day 1: Over the next week, create a playlist/playlists of songs in your target language(s), they can either have a specific mood or genre or they can be a collection of songs you've discovered. When you feel like you're done with your playlist, share it so others can find some new songs. If you already have a playlist, you can add songs to it and update it.

Day 2: Write an explanation on a grammar rule in your target language (such as verb tenses, exceptions, word order, etc). Include sentences to show how and when it is used.

Day 3: Either make a vocab list or find a vocab list you like and make sentences using those words. You can make them as long or as short as you like. This is a good way to contextualise vocab words and learn them in context. Share your sentences and highlight the vocab word.

Day 4: Record yourself reading an article, short story, or passage (basically anything written in your target language). Listen to it and see if you can point out any areas you can improve with your speaking and any areas that you're doing well. You can post your recording if you wish.

Day 5: Post at least 2 songs that you like in your target language. Make sure you add a link to them so people can go listen to them.

Day 6: Share a study tip you have. This can range from how you organize your notes to playlists that help you study to apps you use to review. Just something that you find makes studying easier (and more fun).

Day 7: Share with everyone some langblrs you enjoy seeing on your dash, try to put at least 5 people (and make sure you @ them!).

Week 3

Day 1: Remember that playlist you made/are making? Take a song you really like and make a vocab list of words you don't understand, learned from the song, or recognize but don't quite remember. Post so others can see and link the song. If you have extra time and/or want a bit more of a challenge, translate the song as well, either into English or another language.

Day 2: Write about a festival or holiday that is celebrated in a country that speaks your target language. This can be either something you’ve celebrated yourself, have wanted to participate in, or have never heard of before. You can write this in any language you’d like.

Day 3: Make another vocab list from the list you made at the beginning of the challenge. If you are learning two or more languages, make the vocab list in 3 languages (meaning for example: French, German, and English or Japanese, Arabic, and Ukrainian).

Day 4: Find a recipe written in your target language and translate it into your native language (or another language of your choice) or find a recipe in your native language and translate it into your target language. Bonus points if you actually make it (share pictures if you do)!

Day 5: Create a collection of resources you use to study/learn your target language. Add links to them if possible so others can also use them.

Day 6: Create a post explaining a grammar rule that you had/are having difficulties learning. If you’re currently having difficulties, do your best to explain and ask others to help you understand it better. Include example sentences in your explanation.

Day 7: How do you feel at the end of this challenge? Did you meet any goals while doing this? Do you feel more confident in your language abilities? Where do you think you'll go from here? Answer these questions either in your native language or your target language.

Hopefully you guys enjoy/enjoyed this challenge. After you've completed the challenge, I encourage you to continue your studies in your target languages and support others in theirs.

[draventhedemon]

Hi, after what we saw today I'm ready for the new fics! So may I request Clay or (Dream) x fem!reader were they also announce that they are getting married after he revealed? "Also we're getting married in 3 months" P.s -can you make it were none of their friends knew, and found out sametime as the fans?

Because of the fact that the video clearly took more then one take to get it right. I'm gonna make that one of the key points of the Story.

⚠️ Warning for swearing ⚠️

(When recording the video)

For the past few minutes Clay has been doing take after take. Trying to get the perfect way to drop the news of us getting married. But after at least 10 minutes of him mumbling at a camera I just got up from the bed in the corner and walked behind him.

"Do you need help?" I ask with a chuckle as I pull up a chair. "Hi camera, you might know me as Y/n, Y/u/n or just that random person who betrayed L'manburg with Eret and starting dating Dream afterwards" I say with one breath.

But I stop at the sound of the tea kettle sitting beside me doing his iconic wheeze before I continue "And you also may be asking why I'm in this video, it's about Dreams face reveal, not some random girl" I get cut off by Clay suddenly saying

"your not a Random girl" as he kisses me on the forehead and turns back to the camera "And the reason why she is here is because a month ago we got engaged" Clay says with less mumbles then before.

"Dear god, this is gonna be weird to post" I say as I hold up my hand to show the ring he got me. "The wedding is happening in 3 months and we are both hoping for all of our friends and family to show up. And hopefully he doesn't start a WAR with Tommy at the wedding". I look at him with a strong death glare.

"I'm more mature then that" Clay says as he turns a bit in his chair. "Clay, we make governments in Minecraft for a living. There is no such thing as being mature" I say as we spend the next few minutes explaining what's gonna be happening and when.

(Putting the video online)

We have been looking at the chat flying by during the face reveal, saying either hateful or kind things about him. And I've been standing behind him and leaning against his gaming chair from moral support the entire time.

"How many people are gonna say that your hot?" I ask as he laughs and responds with "There hearts are gonna be shattered at the end of this video". "Most probably more by the fact that it's me and not George." I say as we break out into a fit of laughter.

"I love you, remember that no matter what they say I will still love you" He turns to me in his chair and pulls me onto him so I sit on his lap. "I love you too" I kiss him as we turn back to the monitor, "Here we go!" I say as I show up on screen.

'Who is she?'

'Is that Y/n?!?'

'Who the fuck is she'

The chat says but when we suddenly say the big news the chat completely changes and turns into.

'WHAT?!?'

'Will someone explain to me who she is!?!'

And

'POG!'

And some hateful things but we don't pay attention to those because suddenly from across the house we hear Nick scream

"WHAT THE FUCK!" Which completely catches us off guard and sends us into another fit of laughter as we hear him run up to the door and open it. "Why didn't you tell me!?!" But we don't answer because of us still dying on the floor.

Ring!

"oh dear god someone is calling" I say as I get up and check who it is.

Ring!

"Some- someones calling me too" Clay picks up his phone while trying to calm down his laughing as Sapnap is just left there with no answers to his several questions.

(The aftermath)

We had to answer a lot of calls that day. And when George got to the house he stole my ring and wore it the rest of the day. And I also spent half of my day talking Eret into being my maid of honor because of both of us being the traitors of Lmanburg and also the bride and maid of honor would be very funny to me...

(this was a lot funner than I thought it would be so I might make a part 2 thats the wedding so... Stay tuned!)

[vellichorom]

hey!! That Anon that’s new to the TSP & Narratorverse - thank you so much for explaining things! I’ve gone through the threads you’ve linked and looked at some of the creators connected to them. Also, I have another question (I hope I’m not intruding on your time, and you have no obligation to answer this), but what is the Lovebug sickness thing? I’ve also seen that around.

ok admittedly I actually don't think I'm as knowledgeable with the Lovebug Virus concept as I would be with Paraverse, but as I've actually been engaged with it a LOT as of late & at least understand the base concept ( I think? ), I'll try to relay ALL that I know to you, dear non! & i thoroughly encourage anyone who may know more to add onto my post!

TDLR; in essence an AU / trend begun by user @things1do that stems from the idea of The Stanley Parable, particularly Stan/Nar, getting infected by a particular love-virus! that's pretty much it I think. lovecore parable, baby!

SO - the " Lovebug AU, " also known as " the Love Virus " is a concept originated from the user mentioned above ( Bubo ) in which, if we're to take the tags from this original post to heart, the/their Narrator opened an email with a virus attached ( implied to be the infamous IRL computer worm ILOVEYOU / LOVE_LETTER_FOR_YOU.TXT.vbs or some variation of it? ) & ended up getting the game bugged.

rather than your standard computer bug effects though, said worm corrupts the parable & simply injects a lovecoric aesthetic into everything, which includes - of course, Stanley & the Narrator; shown through individual outfit, aesthetic, & personality shifts to befit. given their popularity as characters & as a couple, they're most often the characters you'll find if you search the AU anywhere, though I believe any character IN the parable can be lovebugged!

MORE INTERPRETIVE LOVEBUG DISCUSSION BELOW;

& beyond this concept, I don't think there's been much other story added to it? at least, not from Bubo, from what I can tell. truth be told, i think the concept of the Lovebug Virus is just a good, canonically appropriate excuse to draw Parablites in lovecoric outfits & doing shippy/affectionate things with one another!

...but that's not stopped some people.

given the rather open concept with no apparent set story beyond a simple shtick, people have taken it in NUMEROUS different directions with their respective Parable renditions & interpretations.

some stick with the simplicity of the original concept; some others decide to take it a bit further & really harp on the " virus " side of things, either turning it into a literal sickness on cold with a flu or some kind of unfavorable phenomenon in terms of bodily health or the game's code; some others make it a one-sided thing from either Stanley or the Narrator's POV, with the other trying to avoid or cure them- & on that note, I've even seen it translated as a sort of lovecoric zombie virus ( hi @blackkatdraws ); some take it in a more Visceral or thought-provokingly disturbing direction with the virus enhancing the affected's feelings to an obsessive / destructive degree; & then you've got some that take it as an excuse to depict stan/nar as more Lustful, with befitting, revealing / promiscuous clothes to boot. ( you know who you are & i know WHAT you are )

etc etc -- & to each their own, i suppose! it's a very loose, interpretation-based concept that you can really push & play & have fun with, so long as you stick to the main " hearts, pink & red, lovey " theme!

ALSO HI-

I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR ACTUALLY TAKING YOUR VALUABLE TIME TO LOOK THROUGH THE LAST POST & MAYBE EVEN THIS ONE; it makes me so very happy to know you took the time to look into my ( maybe needless ) ramble esp when i tried putting a lot of dedication in it, & i LOOOOVE to talk to excess & i love to be thorough about WHATEVER it is i'm explaining, so thank you forever & i'm so VERY VERY happy that hopefully it'll lead you to finding some TSP creators you may want to get into! this is going to be us if you keep that up

[rageprufrock]

Hi Pru, this is a career question... I am in my mid-twenties, female, not quite the most junior employee at my organization but treated often as one. The workplace is highly male-dominated, competitive, the older supervisors sometimes hilariously old-boys'-club, and the younger men (my age) mean well (feminist, etc.) but have their own territories to defend. For complicated reasons I cannot leave. I knew some of this coming in but am ashamed to say that

You’ll love this: my response is so late because I too girlbossed too close to the sun and have accidentally reached mid-senior leadership status at my organization and the past month has been the most hilarious cluster of fucks. Insert clown emoji herey.

ANYWAY.

I have a few thoughts on this one, and hopefully one, or some, of these are helpful as you're navigating your early career.

To address your most immediate question: is it meant to be this hard? I think "is it meant" or "is it always" are two different questions, and each with branching answers completely dependent on your field and profession. Some are notorious for early career hazing--banking, medicine, etc--and then the answers are that the suffering is a feature, not a bug, for these industries (this can be debated ad nauseum but you know what I mean), and then for many, many other professions, the answer is that while it's not meant to be this difficult, it still is, and that it's all we can do to survive it.

But setting aside the macro issues, of whether the role itself is objectively hard or if the environment you're in is objectively sub-optimal, the more nebulous and inescapable thing is that each one of us, individually, in our early career are undergoing one of many puberties and all its attendant implied indignities. I find it weird that culturally we don't talk about this much--at least not in Western or the Eastern cultures with which I'm most conversational--but think about it: in the first five to ten years of your working life, you're often simultaneously navigating a staggering number of life-changing systemic shifts that have a tectonic impact on your lived experience. I

For a lot of us, beginning your life as a working adult means you're likely moving out of your parents' home, which adds a huge amount to your mental load and financial burden.

For a lot of us, these early professional jobs are also the first time we're operating in a performance-reward system for which there is no clear rubric or understandable progression monitoring--there aren't any grades, and I can't tell you the number of people who I've spoken to in my career who have been shocked when they're told they're being put on performance improvement plans even though they thought they were doing fine.

It's like being sent to college with no class list, textbooks hidden in eight different departments run by varyingly helpful people, while trapped in an inescapable group project run by someone who seems just as frazzled as you are, and told "okay well you should need to bring me your completed degree by EOD Thursday." This doesn't even take into account your genetic assignment to play this entire game on hard mode by failing to be a cisgendered man in the dominant cultural demographic.

People who've had multiple jobs and career changes can attest, every new job, no matter how seasoned you are, is fucking exhausting. It's almost a joke among my friends at this point how often I change jobs, and every single time I do, there's at least a six month run where at the end of every day, I'm fucking spent. I couldn't calculate 1+3 if my life depended on it, because I've spent my working day so furiously trying to read the professional tea leaves and figuring out what the actual fuck I'm supposed to be doing--which, funnily enough, is never as clear as you would think! Even if you are at increasingly senior levels of responsibility! It's really fun and good! Your boss's boss's leadership team meetings? Surprisingly similar to when I used go get coffee during my break working at an ice cream shop to complain about our customers and equipment and boss! It's amazing how no matter how much changes, everything stays the same!

So I think in the end, my answer to your question is this:

Is it meant to be this hard? Depending on what you do, maybe.

But should it be this hard? Of course not. Life is short and lush and wonderful, but already so filled with challenges, and it's a shame that being rooted in capitalism, we're all forced to participate in a system that's so unbending and unforgiving.

But does that mean it's going to be forever? Or that you can't survive and thrive and have fun in the process? Absolutely not.

However awful you feel, however bad the job is, it doesn't have to be forever. This role you're in now may be just what you need to find your next, better, better paid opportunity. And maybe that one won't be the ideal for more than a year, maybe two, but that's why you keep an eye out and a keen focus on what you want, and what's most important, and like a shark, you continue to move and grow as you get clearer on where you want to move and how you want to grow. The person I was at 24 could not have imagined the person I am at 38, and I'm guessing that the woman I am today can't fathom who I'll be in another 10 years. Whoever she is, I hope she's still choosing to do hard things and--to the very best of her ability--having a good time in the process.

It's okay to cry about work. It's okay to cry at work, even though I strongly recommend that you do this huddled in a restroom in privacy because otherwise it gets messy--fairly or otherwise. It's okay and normal to do these things. It's okay and normal to feel like a fucking disaster, to feel--or to in actuality!--be categorically failing. It is okay and normal to hate and love your job, and to love money and hate the work. There is no right way to do this, and the only wrong way is to give up on yourself, or to create a situation where you cannot have the freedom of your choices or your future.

It's also going to get easier with time. Even if you don't feel it, every day you're getting more experienced, more confident, more discerning. Those microscopic, atomic changes in you accrue, and I'm sure if you're honest with yourself you can already identify how even today, you are a stronger, more capable person in your professional context than you may have been just a year or two ago. Even if you don't mean to do it, just the experience, the bruises, the callouses from throwing yourself at the brick wall over time will rewrite the person you are--if you do this with your eyes open and intentionally, all the better.

Five years from now, ten years from now, you might still find yourself crying about work. But hopefully you'll share the good fortune I have been privileged enough to have, and find yourself the type of good friends who say, "don't care during work hours, it's beneath you to give them the satisfaction--cry later," and actually have the wherewithal to follow that extremely correct guidance.

So anyway, it shouldn't be this hard, but it is. The good thing is, you're better and stronger than it is, and you can look forward to the day you get to look over the shoulder at all the worlds you've conquered as you get ready to do it all over again.

💖

[crimson-calligraphyx]

Tag List: @cheyfi @kingdomof-omens @daylightlvrs @blade-in-red @jay02bo @itsmrsfuentes @cncohshit @catj422 @lma1986 @chels3a-smile @kiwi475 @cookiesupplier @timid-raccoon

I've been miserable ever since Noah left for the make-up shows from when they had to cancel due to his illness. Sleeping was hard without him, having been using him as a body pillow—we didn't think to grab an actual body pillow, not realizing how reliant I was of Noah for sleeping purposes.

Which is exactly why I was currently dragging one through the front door of our home all while simultaneously grabbing the mail. And grabbing my phone from my back pocket now that Noah was calling.

"Hey," I huffed into the receiver once through the door and threw the pillow onto the couch. "How are we doing?" he asks, a smile evident in his voice. "Good," I smiled lightly to myself; I loved hearing him say 'we' instead of just 'you', knowing he was not only asking about me, but the baby, too. "Tired, but good." "Still not sleeping well?" "Nope, so I bought a body pillow. Hopefully it helps." "Hopefully. But hopefully not too well that you won't snuggle me anymore," he laughs.

I put my phone on speaker and chuckled, shaking my head as I sat down on the couch with the mail in my hands, and flipped through it. There were mostly pre-approvals for credit cards amongst other junk, but one piece in particular caught my attention. It was addressed to me, the returning address of my childhood home back in Virginia, but the name made my heart skip a beat.

Warren Foster

"What the fuck?" I questioned under my breath, immediately tearing it open to read the letter and coming face-to-face with my name written in an all-too familiar script. The first few lines had tears pooling in my eyes and my hands trembling.

My dearest Heather Olivia,

If you are reading this, then I am no longer on this earth, but I am still watching over you. I had Mom keep this so she could give this to you when you needed it most.

My lips quivered and I squeezed my eyes shut, tears now rolling down my cheeks. I couldn't bear to read the rest of it right now and put it back in its envelope, tossing it on the coffee table. I brought a hand to my mouth and tried to stifle the cry I let out, but it was of no use. I couldn't hold my emotions back.

"Liv, why are you crying?" Noah asks calmly before his panic-stricken voice cuts through my hysterics. "Oh my God—are you in labor?" I shake my head 'No', though he can't see it. "Do I need to book a flight back home?" I choke out a 'No'. "Answer me, please, you're freaking me out." I suck in a choppy breath and let out one last sob before trying to answer him. "I-I got a letter from...from my dad." "What the fuck?" He sounded just as shocked as I was. "But your dad is—" "I know," I cut him off. He didn't need to say it.

Dead. My dad is dead, and I never got to see him before he went. Each time that thought crossed my mind, it was like a sucker punch to my chest. I'm back to hysterics in no time.

"Fuck, Olivia, I'm sorry. What did the letter say?" "I-I couldn't read it," I whimpered. "I read the first two lines and put it down. Said he gave it to Mom for her to give me when I needed it most." In a sense, it was comforting. Dad was thinking of future me before he passed, Mom was thinking of me during my pregnancy. She knows the doubt that I sometimes feel, and I'm assuming there was something in that letter that would be uplifting. But I couldn't read it. Not alone.

"What can I do for you?" Noah's voice is soft. "Bring my dad back, just for a minute," I mumbled, fresh tears welling in my eyes. He sighs deeply. I can picture him combing the front of his hair back with his hand. "You know I can't do that, love. I wish I could." "I know," I whisper dejectedly. "I can't wait for you to come home." "I'll be home to you two in no time, I promise." I sniffle, wiping the back of my hand under my nose. "Okay. I'm gonna try to relax some," I huffed. "Are you sure you're alright?" he asks warily. "Yeah, I'll be okay. I love you." "I love you, too. I'll call you later, alright?"

We hung up and I picked up the letter once more, bringing it and the pillow with me into our bedroom. I shoved the piece of mail into my nightstand so I didn’t have to look at it; it was tempting to read, but I know that I wouldn't be able to contain myself if I read it alone. I couldn't have it tip me over the edge and lead to...that.

I sighed and made my way to my bathroom, deciding to take a quick bath to help calm me some. I ran the water and threw some Epsom salt in, all while making sure the water didn't get too hot. I stripped of my clothes, piled my hair on top of my head, and carefully lowered myself into the tub.

It took a moment or two to get situated, trying to find a comfortable way to rest as he wriggles about in my belly. "I love you, but you gotta chill out, dude," I chuckled quietly, and I swear he retaliates with a swift kick to my side. "Asshole," I glare at my stomach, only to laugh at my foolish banter with my belly. I ran a hand over my bump, feeling him start to settle a bit, and I let out a slow breath as the warmth encased me, my eyes falling shut.

I didn't bathe for very long; one of the downfalls of being pregnant is that I couldn't for more than 15 minutes, and I loved taking long baths. As short lived as it was, it certainly helped me calm down—after dressing and getting comfortable with the body pillow, I was out like a light.

-

After a few days of using it, the pillow was easily becoming my best friend, and when I felt it begin to slip from my grasp, I grumbled and clung onto it. I nuzzled my face into the side of it, my arm and leg hooked over it tightening their hold. There was a muted chuckle as I sighed peacefully once I got comfortable again, feeling myself start to fade back into sleep.

In my sleep riddled haze, I can feel the bed dip behind me, but I paid no mind to it. Not until I felt a comforting heat on my back, a ghost of a tingle running down my spine when my hair was brushed away from my neck, a pair of warm lips left in its wake. I whined, bringing my shoulder up to hinder them from tickling me, and a deep chuckle vibrated against my back.

"Hey, love," Noah's velvety voice whispers in my ear. With my eyes still shut, I smile. "Hey. You're home early." "I am," he concurs, leaving a kiss on my cheek. "Took the earliest flight that I could after the last show." I shift, blindly bringing my arm behind me to lace my fingers through his hair, scratching lazily. "Why?" I peek my eyes open, and I can just barely make out his face from the moonlight filtering from the skylight. He grins at me. "To make sure you two are alright," he tells me simply, his large hand splaying over my belly.

I hum, giving him a kiss on his chin, and my eyes flutter shut once more.

"I take it the pillow worked well for you," he says after a moment of silence. "Mhm. I might choose it over you now." I muse, smirking. "Oh, hell no," he grumbles playfully. He slips it from between my legs and tosses it off the bed, landing in a soft thud. He shifts so he's on his back and gently rolls me towards him, my leg instinctively settling over him. "Mine," he states, tightening his arm around me. I laugh, shaking my head against his chest, laying a kiss wherever my lips landed. "Yours."

In the morning, I woke up in the same position; his arm around me, my head nestled against his chest and my leg over top of him.

I glanced up at him, admiring the peacefulness painted on his face as he continued to snooze. With his jaw slack and lips parted, quiet snores sounded from him, and I knew he was exhausted from returning home in the middle of the night. The sunlight pouring over him hadn’t bothered him one bit—usually he’d wake up the second it hit his face.

I carefully removed his arm from around me so as to not disturb him, trying my best to roll as gracefully as I could off his body. It wasn’t quite as easy as it used to be, now with a basketball for a stomach, and I more or less scooted my way out of bed praying I didn’t wake him. When he didn’t so much as stir, I made my way to the bathroom before our son decided to wake up and kick my bladder.

Once I had finished my business and exited our bathroom, I was surprised to see Noah had woken up, him lazily rubbing his eye with his fist. “Good morning,” he croaked, and I immediately apologized for waking him. “You didn’t wake me,” he tells me with the shake of his head, but I’m almost certain I did. “Did you sleep alright?” I smiled lightly, making my way back over to him. I raked the front of his hair back and leaned down to kiss his forehead. “Best sleep I’ve gotten in two weeks.” He takes hold of my hand and presses his lips to the back of it. “Good,” he mumbles against me, and I can feel his lips curl into a smile.

It had been such a short amount of time, but God did I miss waking up to his sheepish, sleep-filled grin and hooded eyes, and the raspiness in his voice that came with the day’s first words.

“Would you like some breakfast?” I asked him. He groans quietly as he sits up, stretching his hands high above his head. “Sure, love, that would be great.” I grin at him before making my way to the kitchen with him following behind me. "What do you feel like having?" "Whatever you feel like having," he sidles up behind me, his arms snaking under mine with his hands settling on my belly. His thumbs run against me in gentle sweeps as he kisses the back of my head. "Hmm...how does French toast sound?" "Sounds perfect."

He unravels himself from me so I can start cooking, persistently asking if I'd like help. I denied him each time; eventually he gave up and parked his ass at the table like I kept telling him to.

With Noah off my back, it doesn’t take very long to set plates down for both of us, and I join him at the table, taking the syrup after he was done dousing his toast with it. He digs in as I put a normal amount of syrup on my breakfast, and I chuckle when he groans after the first bite.

“Good?” I smirk. “So good,” he mumbles through a mouthful. I rolled my eyes, wishing he’d stop talking with his mouth full. “I haven’t had a home cooked breakfast in far too long.” I snort, shaking my head. “It’s been two weeks, Noah.” “And? I missed your cooking…amongst other things,” he winks.

Heat rises to my cheeks at his insinuation, and I hide my smile by taking a bite of the toast. He laughed, and I knew he could see the blush crawling over my face.

“Sorry, I had to,” he snickers. “On a serious note, have you read your letter from…your dad?” He hesitates on the tail end of his question, and my heart leapt to my throat from the mention of it alone. “No, not yet,” I mumble dejectedly, my gaze dropping to the food in front of me. I circle my fork through the puddle of syrup on my plate, swirling the trail of cinnamon into it. “I’ve been waiting for you to come home. I can’t do it alone.”

“Hey,” he says quietly, his fingers grazing over my knuckles to gain my attention. I bring my eyes back to him, seeing his chocolate irises glistening with generosity. “You don’t have to do it alone, I’m here now.” “I know,” I nod shallowly, placing my fork down on my plate to lace my fingers with his.

He gave my hand a squeeze to which I returned, a faint smile grazing my lips as a sense of security washes over me. He was the courage and comfort that I needed for a moment like this, and I was more than grateful for his understanding about it.

I decided after breakfast that we could read it together. He helped me clean up, loading and starting the dishwasher as I wiped down the counter and put the ingredients back to their designated areas. When we were finished in the kitchen, he took my hand in his and asked where I wanted to read it, and he guided me back to our bedroom when I answered him.

I opened the drawer that I had shoved it in two weeks prior and took it out—it was the heaviest thing I have ever held. My eyes immediately watered as I stared at my father’s name on the returning address. Noah slips the envelope from my hand and places it on the nightstand before taking my hands and sitting on our bed.

“Come here, love,” he says in a hushed tone. “Let’s get you comfortable and I can read it to you. How’s that sound?” All I could do was nod as he sat back on the pillow he propped up, his hands pulling me gently into his embrace. I rest my head on his chest, and he reaches for the letter, bringing it to his view. “Ready?”

I take a deep breath, nodding against Noah’s chest as fresh tears fill my eyes from anticipation. He gives me a reassuring kiss on the top of my head before he flips it open, clearing his throat. He read the first two sentences that I had beforehand, and I closed my eyes, my tears spilling and staining his shirt.

“From the day you were born, I knew just how special you were. You easily became the littlest love of my life, my precious baby girl, who later became my Christmas Angel…I’m sure you remember that one time we took down the tree trying to put the topper on it.”

I couldn’t help the choked-up giggle after Noah read the last sentence, the memory was still so fresh in my mind. He pressed his lips against my head once more before he continued reading.

“You blossomed into the most beautiful, courageous, and strong-willed woman that I know you still are to this day, and I enjoyed watching you grow as the years passed. I cherished them.

I remember all the tough days you had when you were in school, how badly you wanted to give up when studying became too overwhelming, or when you didn’t get the grades you wanted on your tests. But with tears in your eyes, you pushed yourself through it, and you passed with flying colors by the end of it all.

The same thing goes for when you got the job for the city. I knew how scared you were, I knew you were afraid of letting me down or not meeting my expectations or whatever it was dragging you down, but you never let that stop you. But I am so, so proud of you for never giving up, and I admire you for your strengths.

If I was half as strong as you are, I wouldn’t be lying on my death bed writing this letter to you. I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough to be able to watch you continue to grow, I’m sorry I succumbed to this disease and left you.

If there is one thing that I want you to remember, it’s that you truly are unstoppable; there isn’t a thing in this world that you cannot accomplish—I said that with my chest, and I took that to my grave.

If there is ever a day that you are doubting yourself, I want you to read this over and over until you find who you are again: the strongest, most beautiful, and courageous woman to walk this earth. The woman I am so proud to call my daughter.

I love you so much.

Until we meet again.

-Dad”

I was a blubbering mess by the time Noah finished reading the letter to me. He puts it back on the nightstand before wrapping his arms around me, rocking me back and forth ever-so-slightly while I cried it out.

In all reality, it wasn’t that bad of a letter, but it made me miss my dad that much more. It made me regret following in his footsteps, which ultimately lead me down a path to where I never got to see him before he passed. I was weak then. Oh, so very weak—and at times, I believe that I’m still weak, unlike what his letter had been telling me.

It took me a long time to recover, and I ruined it after three whole years of being sober. That is weak; I wasn’t the strong-willed person my dad thought I was. And even if I’m strong enough to be sober now due to the pregnancy, there’s always that thought in the back of my head that worries I’ll relapse after having him. But I can’t let that happen.

I won’t let that happen.

|Chapter 24|

[bloggingboutburgers]

hi! so, uh, I wasn't really sure where to send this, but you seem nice and (hopefully) have some advice. I'm aroace, specifically sapphic-oriented cupioromantic ace, and I think I have a squish on this one girl. or maybe mesh? idk. all I know is that I really like her and want to be close to her, I think the word for me is alterous attraction? or maybe platonic or aesthetic, because I think she looks really cool too. honestly, I'm not really sure what the heck I feel :') could be a crush, squish, mesh, or just wanting to be friends. uhh anyways, I'm not really sure what to do about it. idk, I guess I want to become closer to her?

anyways, sorry for bothering you. basically I was wondering if you have any thoughts on what im feeling, what I should do, and also maybe how you and your qpp got into a qpr with each other? if u dont mind.

oh! and congrats on you engagement, your 'no one can know I dont like sex' comics make me smile and also have helped me figure out myself! thanks.

Hey!! I'm so sorry I'm replying to this ask so late T^T Kinda buried myself in other projects of let myself get distracted for this blog for a lil while... Either way I hope I'm not too late TwT And don't worry, you're not bothering at all!! (Also thank you so much for the kind words, they mean a lot TwT)

I guess... Whatever you do about it is up to you honestly, as vapid as that probably sounds of me! Heck, maybe you've already taken some steps since writing to me too, late as I am...

I also don't wanna put a label on how you feel, because it's a very personal thing, but I'll say – honestly you don't even necessarily NEED to put a label on it, not yet or not ever (whatever works for you), if you're not sure how to call it. The most important thing is if you're vibing with what you are, besides that you don't owe anyone any explanation. Though I guess it's also understandable to want to know what to call it if you're gonna bring it up to her... But also (maybe I'm naive, but yeah) I think there's nothing wrong with just sincerely saying you don't know how to call things yet either, even to her. I feel it'd be fair to both of you still, personally.

As far as me and my QPP, I didn't do anything – they were the one who realized they had a squish on me and took all the steps originally to get it going 🙈 Which they told me was definitely nerve-wracking! But yeah, their handle is @civiart if you want to reach out to them too for more advice, or they can also answer further questions here on my behalf, they told me whichever is fine with them^^

But also in case it helps, I've actually drawn how it went down for us here in the past, and I tried to elaborate a bit on my own experience of a QPR here and here!

And sorry again for being late TwT I wish you the best though!

[finnitesimal]

you reblogged that old ask about pissa ever going anywhere with their relationships and i've had some thoughts about this topic and it's probably gonna become a little bit of a rant so no pressure answering or even reading it's your askbox of course. so firsts things first jusr as you said the the answer to that task missa would definitely have to be more present on the server for this to not fall flat and feel very surface level. that being said the ender king stuff that's been going on with phil could potentially be a catalyst for things to move forward but personally i don't know if i like this idea 100%. while it is crucial to phil's character because well it's his lore! i presonally wouldn't like missa to become just an extension to him and a plot device for his story. i'd love missa to have more developement on his own or with other people first because as you said yourself a lot of the times when he's on the server him and phil barely leave each other's side.

the thing with phil ignoring missa's feelings in a way is that it could be easily attributed to him being a repressed old bird, which well, he totally is. and the threat of the ender king constantly looming over him and his loved ones definitely doesn't help with opening up to people these days. but that's where a lot of developement could happen for him and he's already been talking more to his eggs so hopefully he can exchange that trust and honesty to missa soon. and if it takes the ender king to do it then so be it i have more faith in missa being open about things on his own accord than this guy.

honestly i think i saw a post similar to what i'm going to say but i really hope the prison kiss will push some unspoken boundary between them that makes them perhaps question some things or move forward. i'm personally any type of pissa enjoyer but i just hope they can confront each other at some point and talk about how they feel. there's a lot of potential for a very sweet story here it would be a shame if nothing ever happened with it. i know it's probably wishful thinking but hey i can dream.

also we don't really know how the server is going to look and to what extent it's going to be reset but it could be a good chance for them to hang out more if let's say some bases get yeeted or they need to gather resources. or even if the bases are untouched it feels like a good moment for less active members to join since there's been a little bit of pause. what i'm saying is missa please log on more it's really crucial to this.

WOOHOO

i do agree that Missa should get to write his own lore whether it coincides with Phil's or not, he doesn't seem to be into scripting interactions with the others he's more likely to just start playing a bit and then bouncing off that for his cubito's story (spreen's betrayal and him leaving roier's house for it, kidnapping by wolves, being in love with phil, fortnite cheese putting him in prison) overall there's no evidence missa's gonna be involved in the ender king plot in canon unless he and Phil have talked about it

definitely think having a lot of new untouched space could take most of the pressure out of just walking around and seeing everything expand so quickly and being worried about building somewhere someone might have already claimed or on someone else's grounds

canon romantic pissa is still up in the air but ccphil and missa are most definitely aware that they're playing into a traditional romantic love story, theyre gonna have to decide if it'd be better or funnier to keep pivoting around the subject and drive everyone on the island insane or to get the ball FUCKING rolling

I'm going to Have Faith that he will log on more. I'm going to Hope and Pray. Calacaland will prevail

[mazzystar24]

Hello, I hope you are having a good day. I was wondering if I could ask your thought and possible speculation for next episode. I've read what you've answered so I hope this is not a redundant ask.

I know and we all know that this is gonna hurt Buck to feel left behind to be replaced even maybe not feel good enough to be Eddie's friend (or more but my shipper heart need to calm down) and most of us realise that this is most likely, hopefully the time where buck is gonna realise that he feels more towards eddie. But my question is more regarding Eddie, what do you think happens in his pov? Like eddie doesn't have the same problems as buck regarding abandonment issues but he knows buck has them. You think he gonna realise them like during their basketball fight or after (that is gonna hurt to watch) or maybe someone will point it out? And if he realises it would he also go on a journey to realise his feelings or at least have him question why buck feel that and him wanting buck to realise that he should never think eddie will leave him?

And last then I'm stopping cause I don't want to be a bother, but what about Christopher? You think he's gonna be mentioned? Maybe Tommy mentioning him or something switch the flip for buck to start a fight (I know it's mostly and accident but I dont know how else to put it) or eddie uses christopher to anchor him (more episode 7x05 I guess then)? But that feels like the first one hurts way too much and the second like eddie would mask his feelings by using Christopher as a sort os middle ground/shield.

Sorry for the long ask is just that I ve always been the person whose friends preferred other friends and never picked for teams that sort of thing so just the sneak peak hurts to see and I wanted some insight and I've really liked your take on the whole thing. Also, fun fact the only person that did pick me I ended up marrying so eddie please take note lol

Hey anon thanks and you too! <3

I think Eddie’s perspective is super interesting to get into this episode because I genuinely think that he genuinely doesn’t realise that buck could be jealous because in his head he’s reassured Buck so many times and he himself is so self assured in their friendship and their places in eachothers lives that I think it genuinely doesn’t cross his mind at first to even think buck may be jealous. Like you saw him in that sneak peak like he saw buck and started bouncing on his heels like OMG BUCK IS COMING? YOU SHOULD HAVE MENTIONED THATS SO GREAT!!!!!🥰😍👏🏽👏🏽

I think like when he sees the jealousy that seems to be apparently directed toward him over tommy(??) and also towards him having other friends that he’ll be a little pissed and hurt and confused inside but nothing like deep or angsty I think he knows buck enough to like understand how deep his insecurities lie and will very easily overcome this little conflict

I don’t think from his perspective he’d question buddie things based off of this because their relationship has always been different than other friendships and buck has always been very insecure in general so he may hash it up to that, but if buck were to point out that not only is he feeling replaced on a friendship level by Tommy and maybe mention something about Marisol it could cause a little 🤨👀👀👀 moment but I think that’s the secret optimist in me

Ah stop don’t worry about being a bother I legit love these asks, on the Christopher front I think that’d be hard to fit in but would be cool to see, like I think that based off interviews it’s supposed to be a very lighthearted episode so I’m not expecting an overt amount of angst. But Chris is such a huge part of Eddie’s life and this is a character driven episode so I can see them mentioning him. Also I sorta made a joke about this but I can see them not so subtly comparing player Chris at the start of the season to this funny little jealousy thing going on between buck and Eddie.

Again DONT APOLOGISE FOR THE LONG ASKS AND I WONT APOLOGISE FOR THE LONGASS RAMBLING ANSWERS (that’s a lie I will continue to do that but I’m a hypocrite) I totally get what you mean like that is such a shitty feeling but I don’t think that this episode seems to be that angsty so hope it’s lighthearted for you too when it airs. That last part was so adorable btw yes Eddie should take notes from you and your spouse 😌

[butterfly-casket]

Sometimes breaking down and crying to your primary care physician....works

I was desperate for answers at the end of 2023. I mean, it's been 3 years and I still don't have answers. I had lost all hope, as I was gaining new symptoms, and still no one had any idea what could be wrong. Until I read about MS, and it fit nearly all of my symptoms. I scheduled the first appointment I could to discuss it with my primary. After scheduling it, I realized I had only scheduled a 20 min appointment, and spent 4 hours getting all of my symptoms typed out with dates of when they started, how long they lasted, when they got worse. I typed out a script to communicate to my doctor all of the most important/relevant information in the most condensed form possible. I was ready to be in and out, spend 5 minutes getting him the information, and the next 15 discussing with him the plan of action.

Instead, my doc was pissed that I was even there. I had only seen his NP up until this point and he was so upset that I, a person with so many issues, had come in to see him personally the Friday before his Christmas break. He made sure to spend the first 5 minutes of the appointment interrupting me to express his frustration, and I started to feel like he wasn't going to help me at all.

I couldn't help it. I couldn't stop myself as I started shaking out of fear, and then the anger-override kicked in. I whipped out my symptom list, and his demeanor immediately changed. I told him as calmly as I could in the moment "THAT is my symptom list. Are you just not going to help me?"

He started saying "Well its just that you're going to try and make this appointment take 3 hours—" I cut him off to say "No, I wanted to make this appointment 20 minutes but you just spent the first 5 putting your problems on me." *cues the flood gates* "I've had doctors, nurse practitioners, specialists all innaccurately record my symptoms, if they ever even recorded them at all. I have to walk with a cane, I haven't been able to work for a year and a half, I have NO income, I am just trying to survive and I've been dismissed and not believed over and over again, to the point that it's effected my medical records. It makes EVERYONE think I'm fucking INSANE. I just want some help. I just need some fucking help. I just need some fucking answers. Please."

He started getting in my chart and got to business. He immediately ordered about 8 retests and 6 new ones. He got me a referral to Neurology, ordered X-rays, a swallow test, and MRIs to check for MS.

I went to the Rheumatology appointment I already had scheduled a few weeks later. I felt like the doctor was actually listening to me for the first time in forever. He made a point to record every one of my symptoms as I listed them. He seemed to care. I just came back from my swallow test today. The person performing the test acted like he read through my whole chart and was asking me a lot of questions about my other issues. He asked me if I had the MRIs yet before the test, and when going over the results he said "If it does turn out to be MS, come back to us. We will help you, figure out what works for you."

I've been terrified of being too direct with my doctors, I wouldn't even tell them the diagnosises that I thought it COULD be out of fear of them going "You've just been looking up things on the internet, I'm giving you a munchausens diagnosis." But I was desperate. It was a real cry for help. And thank fuck he saw that. Even if I still don't find answers, I've brought to their attention the mistreatment and carelessness I've been dealing with and they have decided to change that. Hopefully I will be treated like a normal human being and get my symptoms recorded correctly.

[perfectlyvalid49]

Hello, I am not Jewish, but I grew up in an area with a noticeable population of Jews who, historically, were able to be openly Jewish. I learned from a young age about the horrors that have happened to your people throughout history, and have been disgusted by the rise in more blatant antisemitism that has reared its ugly head in the days and months since October 7th, a day which also horrified and disgusted me. I have also long considered myself to be pro-Israel, seeing the neccessity for Jewish self-determination in this world.

With my background out of the way, I saw one of your posts mentioned things we non-Jews might not notice are antisemitic due to it being part of our culture and what not, and I was hoping you could tell me some of them? I've detested antisemitism for as long as I can remember, so if I've been unintentionally doing anything that fits that, I would like to stop. Thank you and have a nice day.

I want to start by saying that I really appreciate the fact that you’re trying, and that you want to learn to do better in case you’re making any mistakes. I am a firm believer that EVERYONE has blind spots when it comes to how they treat members of minority groups, be it antisemitism, racism, homophobia, or whatever else, and that while intent isn’t all that matters, it matters a lot. While I’m answering your question, I’m going to cover some stuff you may already know based on the background you gave in the hopes that this answer will be useful for other people as well. I hope you don’t mind.

I also want to put a couple caveats on what I’m about to say. The first is that this is not a comprehensive list. It’s just whatever came to mind while I was typing this up. I’m sure I’ve missed things, but hopefully this gives you an idea of the kind of thing I was talking about. If anyone sees this and wants to add additional examples, please do!

The other caveat is that different Jews will have different definitions of what is and is not antisemitic. The big obvious stuff, like people chanting “Gas the Jews,” or accusations that Jews use the blood of Christian children to bake their bread, almost everyone is going to agree that’s antisemitic. The more subtle stuff, which is what we’re going to be talking about here, is more likely to prompt disagreement. For example, last year there was a lot of conversation on Tumblr about how the goblins in the Harry Potter game were an antisemitic caricature. The reaction from Jews I know in real life basically boiled down to, “Yeah, I guess I can see it. I don’t really think it’s that big of a deal though.” So, some of the stuff I mention, other Jews might disagree that it’s antisemitic. And there are some things that I might leave out because I don’t think they’re antisemitic that other Jews think really are antisemitic. That’s OK!

I think that if we’re going to talk about antisemitism that is present in Western culture, then we need to talk about the antisemitism that’s baked into Christianity, and acknowledge that because a lot of Western culture has been heavily influenced by the church, even if a person is not religiously Christian, if they are culturally Western, then Christianity has had a large impact on their culture, and we can say that they are culturally Christian. And if this post gets big, I know that I’m going to get murdered for that statement, but that’s ok, there’s nothing Christians love more than a crucified Jew (THIS IS A JOKE (mostly.)) I don’t know if you’re Christian or not, but I live in the US, and most people here are heavily influenced by Christian thought and philosophy without realizing it, even if they’re not Christian, and these are the people I was talking about when I made the comment that prompted the ask.

So how is antisemitism baked into Christianity? Well, to understand that, we need to understand some of the problems early Christianity had, namely, the fact that the Jews of the time rejected their beliefs and the fact that Rome persecuted early Christians pretty hard. And we also need to talk about Supersessionism.

Early Christians had a major issue with contemporaneous Jews because the Jews rejected their teachings. Like, Jesus and his followers were Jews, and after his death they wanted all other Jews to agree that he was the messiah, even though he didn’t do all the things the Jewish messiah was supposed to do. This is both why Christianity has the second coming (so that he can do those things) and why the New Testament opens with a genealogy linking Jesus to David (the messiah is supposed to be from the line of David), the early Christians were *desperate* for legitimacy in their new religion. And when the rest of the Jewish community rejected it, they got a little mad, and decided that Christians clearly understand Jewish holy texts better than Jews do (up to and including editing said texts to better support their views), something that persists to this day. I have actually seen Christians show up on posts about being Jewish and try to explain to the Jews about how we’re wrong about our own religion. This is absolutely antisemitism, and it does really happen.

The other thing early Christians decided is that the Jews have been presented with the true word of G-d and have rejected it, so they must be evil. This is true of the early Christians, but I also want to stress that almost every major player in the Protestant Reformation absolutely HATED Jews. Luther literally published a treatise entitled “On the Jews and Their Lies”, and some scholars think that there is a direct line between Luther’s hatred of Jews and the formation of the Nazi party. I think Luther was the worst of them, but none of those guys were cool with Jews, so just know that all of the protestant denominations were founded by guys who would kill me if they could.

Because the Jews were now considered evil, the Christians concluded that the covenant G-d had made with the Jews now applied to the Christians. Now, in Christian thought, they were the Chosen People, and the Jews were no longer so blessed. This is the premise behind supersessionism, and it basically posits that Christians have replaced Jews as the true people of Israel, and it was embraced by many of the men who shaped what Christianity is today, in virtually every denomination of Christianity that exists.

The early Christians dealt with their Roman persecution problem by allying themselves with the Romans. One might think that this would be difficult, as the Romans are very much the bad guys in the new testament. Like, the guys who arrested Jesus were Roman, and following Rome’s orders, Pilate was Roman, and the men who put Jesus on the cross were Roman. So how could Christianity ally with the people who killed Jesus? Well, it’s simple, they were already mad at the Jews for rejecting their new religion, so they would claim that all of that was the Jews’ fault so the Romans could be allied with for political power. And Rome didn’t like the Jews anyway, so they loved it when the Christians threw the Jews under the bus.

So, a lot of cultural antisemitism has its basis here, with this idea that Jews are not like the rest of us, they’re somehow worse (“the rest of us” meaning people in Christian cultures). And while a lot of it has turned into more overt antisemitism (“Jews killed Jesus,” Jews kill Christian children for their blood to make bread/matzoh, Jews control money/media/government). But this also turns into things like sermons about the evils of the Pharisees or praising Jesus for the cleansing of the Temple. How is that antisemitic? Well, the Pharisees are the fathers of modern Judaism, so if their evil, then the modern version of our religion is based on the thoughts of evil men. Jesus’s cleansing of the Temple was, from a Jewish perspective, a story about a man deciding that the systems that Jews established to make worship easier should be taken away. Praising that is praising the disruption of Jewish worship.

And on the other end of things, we have people (mostly Christians, but some not), who are in love with the idea of Jews, but not actual Jews. In non-Christians, this looks like people with the opinion “Christians suck, but the Jews are cool.” As an example, I had a guy show up on one of my posts to let me know that he used to hold Jews in high regard because he thought our culture would make us immune from nationalism and far-right ideologies. He was so disappointed in us when we behaved just like other groups of human beings. And while he said that he had thought well of us, he still thought of us as being not like other human cultures – that’s antisemitic. And being mad at us for acting like other humans? That’s antisemitic too.

In Christians, it usually looks like people saying “We love Jews, Jesus was a Jew!” This implies that the only reason to love Jews is because of a relation to a deity we don’t believe in. It ignores real, live Jews in favor of people who if real, have been dead for 2000 years, and makes it seem like our only value is that you like one guy from a very different version of our culture (modern Judaism is VERY different than what Jews contemporary with Jesus would have practiced). These people are also the ones who are most likely to try to connect with Judaism through cultural appropriation. The most common example of this is churches that hold a “Passover Seder.” Judaism is a mostly closed religion, and our holidays are not for other people to play dress up. Like, imagine if a church in the US said it was going to do a Native American ceremony with no Native American input, and you have an idea of the level of cultural appropriation. And people would rightly call that out as not ok, but churches do this all the time. The excuse that they use is that the last supper was a Seder, but while that may be true, the modern seder, which is what most churches try to do, is not how Jesus would have celebrated in the time of the Temple. So, their reasoning doesn’t hold much water, Jews tend to be pretty clear that it’s not ok as far as we’re concerned, so this behavior is very problematic.

Moving on from Christianity, there’s also stuff that has been around so long we’ve forgotten their antisemitic origins. I mentioned goblins at the start of this, but did you know that witches are also based on antisemitic stereotypes? The green skin, the big nose, the hat which matches hats Jews were required to wear in parts of medieval Europe, the magic received from a deal with the devil – these are all heavily based on antisemitic caricatures of Jews. And while I don’t think witches by themselves are antisemitic, if you start pairing them with other antisemitic things it gets bad fast. Like, a witch is not antisemitic, and a person kidnapping children is not antisemitic, but a witch kidnapping children is raising some serious red flags. And a cabal (the word cabal is derived from Kabbalah, which is a Jewish practice, and its use is ALSO antisemitic) of witches doing so is a big freaking problem.

Or we could talk about Charles Dickens. His works are considered classics, and are often required reading in school. But Fagin in Oliver Twist is a walking antisemitic Jewish stereotype, and that’s never called out in lesson plans. So to people who have never met a Jew, but have read this classic of English literature, Fagin is what they think of when they think Jews. For the classes with one Jewish kid – how do you think it feels to have everyone in class be like, “Oh you’re Jewish, just like Fagin the bad guy!” Of note, Dickens did write a much less antisemitic Jewish character in a later novel, Our Mutual Friend, but of these two, which one gets taught?

I also want to talk about institutional antisemitism. This is similar to the idea of institutional racism, if you’re familiar with that concept – the idea that racism has worked its way into how our very society is structured, so even if you try very hard to be anti-racist, the society you live in is designed to make life harder for POC. Institutional antisemitism is the same thing, except the system is rigged against Jews instead.

We’ll start with one that Jews and Blacks have in common – redlining. It’s the practice of not allowing people (mostly Black people, but also other POC) to buy houses in certain areas. Usually this was done by banks not giving mortgages to people, but there are also homes where it’s in the deed to the house, or in the by laws of the local HOA that you’re not allowed to sell to Black people. It turns out that some houses/HOAs also have “no Jews allowed” rules as well. And it’s super subtle – is a neighborhood Jew free because we’re an incredibly small portion of the population and just so happen to not live there? Or are they legally barred from living there? It can be hard to tell without doing some significant digging. My synagogue actually had a booth at our Purim carnival last year so that we could see if our neighborhood still had anti-Black housing laws so we could work on getting them changed if so. Solidarity.

There’s also probably some institutional antisemitism in your workplace. There sure as heck is in mine, and the last time I brought it up I was told that I could find work elsewhere if I had an issue with company policy. One of the more common ones it that many jobs that require work on Sundays give a higher rate of pay for that day. The historical reason for that is because Sunday is the Sabbath, and if your company is going to force you to work on the holy day, then they’re going to value that time more highly (my company does an extra dollar an hour for Sunday hours.) But Sunday isn’t the Sabbath for Jews, and when I asked if I could be compensated for my time on MY day of rest, well, see above for the answer I got.

You can also look at the holiday situation. My company is open 357 days a year. Of the 8 days we are closed, one is for Christmas, one is for Easter and one is for New Years on the Christian calendar (It’s the Gregorian calendar after POPE Gregory). Most people don’t work Sundays, so there’s no pay for Easter, but Christmas and New Years are both paid holidays. But the Jewish New Year, which is a religious holiday, is not. Nor are any other Jewish holidays. And we have a lot, and many of them require that you not work if you’re religiously observant. Enough that most people would have to spend their entire allotment of PTO for the year, just to have off for religious observance. You could argue that Christmas and New Years and Easter are federal holidays, except Easter isn’t, and also at my company we aren’t given off for all federal holidays (we’re open for president’s day and MLK day and so on), so you actually kinda do have to defend why these made the cut. Also I’m still waiting for the reason why a Christian holiday is also a Federal holiday in a country that supposedly values the separation of Church and State.

Jews also feel this at school. In college I had a professor schedule a midterm on Yom Kippur – the holiest day on the Jewish calendar, and a holiday that is observed, in part, by not consuming any food or water for 25 hours. I asked if I could take the test on a different day, and my request was denied. I’m sure my school probably had someone I could have talked to about this but I didn’t know that at the time, so I felt like my options were come in to class on a holiday or take a 0% and screw over my grade for the semester. I chose to celebrate as best I could, and duck out of services for an hour and a half to take the test. The professor (in what I’m sure he thought was an act of kindness) had brought several barrels of apples, so that we could each have a snack while we tested. I almost committed murder that day (what, my blood sugar was low enough to be non-existent at that point and I was feeling pretty cranky). And like, I don’t think the professor was trying to be antisemitic. He was trying to be fair by making us all test at the same time, and kind by bringing us a snack. But in effect, he made life much harder for the one Jewish student in his class by refusing an easy accommodation.

And is not being accommodating to Jews antisemitic? Yeah, kinda? It sure feels that way when it seems like your only options are 1) things are shitty because people won’t accommodate you, 2) you have to work extra hard to figure out how to accommodate yourself, or 3) you can stop being Jewish and then everything suddenly is so much easier. Another really common example of this is getting invited to a party, and then none of the food is kosher. Your options are 1) go hungry, 2) bring enough food that’s kosher for yourself and everyone else (otherwise they might eat the kosher stuff and you’re back to 1), or 3) the problem goes away when you stop keeping kosher. And the reason I feel this is antisemitic is that the host is making the space unwelcoming to Jews – you can come, but you’re not gonna like it, so you might as well not come. 

The last thing I want to talk about is treating Jews as white. A person might think that this is a good thing, like it’s granting us access to white privilege, but in reality it’s ignoring our needs as a minority. Claiming that Jews are white ignores that some Ashkenazi and many non-Ashkenazi Jews are definitely not even close to white, and it downplays the real discrimination Jews face. Studies have proven that it’s harder to get hired with a Jewish sounding name, and an article recently came out that said the prosecution was deliberately excluding Jews from juries (this is illegal discrimination) because they were less likely to give the death penalty, as examples. And even for white-passing Jews, the Shoah was very much about how Jews were not white. That was a pretty significant part of the Nazi ideology.

And this becomes an even bigger problem when the people who should want to be allies – other minorities and their white allies deny us the ability to seek help from them. When we talk about the discrimination that we face, we’re very frequently ignored, or told that we’re white and that we don’t know what it’s really like. This is what the left is doing right now when it calls us “oppressors” or “colonizers” – it’s denying our history of being oppressed and our history of being colonized because some of us look like we came from Europe.

Anyway, if you’re still here (I know this is VERY long), I hope this was helpful in understanding some of the ways that antisemitism can be present in small things, from church sermons to pay rates to fairy tales. And I want to be clear, I’d much rather deal with the antisemitic implications of Hansel and Gretel than deal with people chanting “Jews will not replace us.” But in an ideal world, I wouldn’t have to deal with either.