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#I came here for a good time and am honestly feeling so attacked right now
rosemusic · 1 year
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*poking head out from under my blankets*
Hi.
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bitch why is youtube showing me ads for an anti-trans "documentary"
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gardenvarietywizard · 4 months
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"There's an essential difference between being a poet and writing poetry. There are, in a sense, two poets, the one alone writing a poem and the one in a black turtleneck and beret, trying to look sexy." -Ted Kooser
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lee-laurent · 5 days
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T'es ben chix - Luke Hughes
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Summary: Amélie decides Luke Hughes is the cutest boy she's ever seen, but she doesn't know how to tell him.
wc: 7k
content: fluff, a little bit of angst, kissing, panic attacks, anxiety, quick make out session, a couple dirty jokes, long distance relationship (let me know if missed anything!)
notes: don't let the title fool you, this fic is still in english!! i realized the other day while doing schoolwork that i don't have a fic that discusses being french-canadian. so... here we are! this fic was super fun for me to write and i incorporated experiences and challenges i have faced over the last few years. a lot of the mistakes that amélie makes are mistakes that i have made or that other french speakers make when speaking english bc sometimes we try to directly translate things and it just does not work lol i reallly hope you guys enjoy!!! and to any other francophones out there: let's be friends!!
just finished writing and it's about 5k words more than i was planning
Amélie honestly wasn't the biggest fan of going out back home, so going out in a place where she could barely speak the language was even worse. But a few of the girls she'd befriended had convinced her it was a good way to get to know more people and to let loose. She sat with the three other girls at a small table, her fingers drumming against the glass of her cocktail.
"Yeah, what did you think of that guy that presented today, Am?"
"Hm? He did... good."
"No, silly. Did you think he was cute?"
"Oh, um, he's... how do you say... not my type?"
"Not your type? Then what is your type, Am?"
"Probably that guy she's been making googly eyes at all night," one of the others teased.
"Who? The tall, curly haired guy in the corner?"
Amélie blushed, sipping at the alcohol for courage.
"Ooo, she's totally into him!"
"You should go talk to him, Am!"
"No... I tell you... no American boys," she waved them off.
"Well, that's too bad. Cause it looks like he's comin' over here. We'll be at the bar if you need us."
"Guys..."
But it was too late, the other girls were already up and headed towards the bar.
"Calisse," she mumbled, trying to ignore the tall figure approaching her table.
"Mind if I sit?" he asked. She looked up at him, her lips pursed. He had the same curly hair and boyish smile that her friends had been teasing her about. She really hadn't planned on talking to anyone tonight, let alone any boys. The girls knew her rule: no falling for any boys while she was in America.
"Uh... sure," she replied, gesturing to the empty chairs across from her.
He smiled, sitting down casually, rubbing his palms on his pants. "I'm Luke. I, uh, I thought I'd come introduce myslef since we, uh, made eye contact so many times."
Amélie bit her lip, nodding as he spoke. She barely knew enough English to follow what her friends were saying, and now she had to talk to some random guy at this bar she didn't even want to be at. "I, uh, I am Amélie."
"Amélie? That's a really pretty name. Did I, uh, did I say it right? Amélie?"
Her cheeks flushed, her eyes flickering down to her drink. "Yeah... that is right. Thank you." Her fingers tightened around the glass, trying to think of something to say next, but everything just came in French.
Luke could sense her hesitation, suddenly becoming way more nervous about coming over. Maybe it had been stupid. Maybe he was making her feel uncomfortable. "I just thought... I don't know. You seemed nice. Do you, uh, want to talk, or...?"
She met his gaze, taking a deep breath. He was trying and he seemed nice, like he really wanted to talk to her. "I... my English, it is not very good," her accent thickening as she spoke. "It is... hard for me."
Luke nodded, leaning forward slightly. He had teammates that didn't speak English as their first language, so he kind of knew what to expect. "That's fine. I'm sure it's better than my French. That is your first language, right? French? Sorry, I just assumed cause your name-"
"Yes, French," she cut him off, giggling at his rambling.
"I can barely say anything in French, so you've already got me beat."
His attempt to make her feel better worked... a little. "It is easier... to write. But speaking... more pressure, I forget the words lots."
"I get that. But we can just... talk slowly."
She sipped at her drink, waiting for him to continue.
"So, what brings you to Jersey? Not a lot of French people here."
"Exchange... at Rutgers. I am from Québec. Saguenay. But I come here... and I work on my English."
"That's super cool. It's awesome that you're pushing yourself to get better. I, uh, I went to Umich for a bit, but-"
"Umich?"
"Oh, right. University of Michigan. I lived in Michigan before I lived here."
"You move here because..."
"For hockey. I play hockey."
"Oh... that's cool. I like Les Canadiens. You play in the LNH?"
"The NHL? Yeah, I do. You like hockey?"
"Everyone in Québec likes hockey. Very popular."
"But you didn't know who I was," Luke teased.
"Only like Les Canadiens, sorry," she shrugged.
"Well, that's fair, I guess. The Habs are pretty big in Québec, huh?"
"Yes! My family... all big fan." She felt comfortable talking about her family, talking about home, the things she liked. Her dad watched every Habs game on TV and sometimes he'd even drive down to Montréal for a weekend to see them play.
"My family loves hockey too. Everyone plays. My mom, my dad, me, and both my brothers. It's like in our blood... or something."
"They play for... the same team?"
"One of them does. Jack, he plays with me. My other brother, Quinn, he plays in Vancouver," Luke tried to keep it casual, not wanting it to seem like he was bragging.
"Ah! The Canucks!"
"See, you know a bit about other teams," he teased.
"Shhh," she giggled. "Your family... they seem very... what's the word... talented."
"Guess you could say that."
She took another sip of her drink, her mind buzzing with questions to ask, but none of them coming to her in English. She wanted to ask more about his brothers, about how he started playing hockey, but her mouth just couldn't keep up with her brain. She also didn't want to come off as rude or obsessed with him because of his title, so she just nodded.
"You don't have to worry, you know. I'm not judging you," Luke comforted. "So, what do you do when you're learning English or watching the Habs? You got any other hobbies?"
"I like to... read. And bake... when I have time."
"Reading and baking," Luke mused. "What do you bake?"
"Everything," she giggled. "Tarte au sucre is my preferred. My mom... she always bakes with me."
"Tarte au sucre? What's that? Sugar pie?" Luke's eyes lit up. "You'll have to make me that one day. I've never had it."
"Maybe. You will have to see."
"Challenge accepted."
Amélie went to respond, but her phone buzzing stopped her. It was her friends calling, probably ready to head on to another bar. She didn't want her conversation with Luke to end, but she knew she couldn't stay there all night.
"I have to go. My friends... waiting," she sighed.
Luke's face fell a little but he nodded. "Yeah, I get it. But I, uh, this was fun."
"Me too."
There was silence for a little, neither of them wanting to be the first to say goodbye. "You should give me... your phone number. So you can try my tarte au sucre."
"Sounds like a plan," Luke said, handing his phone over for her. She typed in her name and phone number, adding a '<3' next to Amélie.
"Text me," she giggled, waving goodbye as she joined the other girls at the bar. Luke watched as the four of them started talking amongst themselves quickly, giggling as Amélie told them about her conversation with the hockey player.
He finally stood up, making his way back over to the table where his teammates were sat. Curtis raised an eyebrow at him, a smirk plastered on his face.
"Well, how'd it go, Romeo?" He leaned forward, failing to conceal his grin.
Luke rolled his eyes, "Good, actually. Really good."
Nico raised his pint, "Told you. You just had to go for it."
"So... what's next?" Curtis nudged him. "You ask for her number?"
Luke nodded, trying to play it cool. "Yeah, we'll probably meet up again."
"Probably?"
"Okay, fine. Yeah, we'll see each other again. I'm going to try her sugar pie she was talking about."
"Sugar pie? Is that what we're calling it nowadays?" Nico teased, causing the whole table to erupt in laughter.
Luke shook his head, letting the teasing slide. His mind was too focused on the girl with a French accent and promises of baking him pie. He had to see her again.
~~
Luke found texting Amélie way easier than he'd imagined. She wasn't lying when she said her writing was better than her speaking. Her texts barely ever had mistakes, in fact sometimes they were worded better than his.
They texted back and forth constantly, which earned Luke some teasing from his colleagues. In writing, Amélie was much more confident, returning his flirting with practiced ease. Her personality really shone through in a way it hadn't at the bar. She'd occasionally crack jokes, usually about how he didn't know any French and that she'd have to teach him. Their conversations flowed, talking about their days, sharing stories, discussing the schoolwork that Amélie had, and sometimes sharing pictures of their meals. Although Jack did most of Luke's cooking, he'd never admit that to the girl.
You have to come and try my tarte au sucre soon! Only if you're brave enough though ;)
Luke grinned at his phone, his fingers furiously typing back a reply.
Oh, I'm brave enough. Just let me know when, and I'll be there.
I will. Maybe next week? I need to make sure it's perfect first.
Deal.
~~
Amélie paced her apartment, making sure that everything was in order before Luke came over. She was even more nervous than she had been in the bar. She really wanted things to go well. They had decided to label the event as their first date, and although a bit informal, she was still shitting herself.
The pie was sitting on her kitchen island, untouched. She didn't want to eat any of it until Luke was there to eat it with her. She was worried he'd get in trouble because it wasn't part of his meal plan for work, but he had reassured it multiple times that it wasn't a big deal if he had a little pie.
Just as she was about to rearrange her throw pillows for the third time, there was a knock at her door. She froze mid-step, wiping her hands on her jeans as she made her way to the door.
It was just a pie. And it was just Luke. Nothing to be too worried about.
She hesitated for a moment before she pulled the door open, tilting her head back to look up at Luke. He was standing there in a Devils hoodie and some track pants, a baseball cap covering his curls. He looked relaxed, his hands tucked in the pocket of his hoodie. Amélie hated how nonchalant he looked in comparison to her.
"Hey," he greeted. "I brough my appetite, as promised."
"Good. I hope you are ready," she joked, stepping out of the way to let him in. He pulled off his shoes, taking in her cozy apartment. He laughed when his eyes landed on the big Québec flag hung behind her couch.
"I'm sure it'll be amazing. I'm looking forward to it, don't worry."
She nodded, though her nerves didn't disappear. She led him into the kitchen where the pie sat waiting. The smell of it filled the small space, warm and sweet.
"Wow, looks good, Am. Guess you weren't kidding about being a good baker."
"It's like you with hockey. My talent," she giggled, blushing as their eyes met.
"I don't know. Your baking skills may be miles ahead of my hockey skills."
"Don't lie. Let's see if it tastes as good as the smell," she grabbed a knife, finally cutting the pie into pieces. She placed a generous slice in front of Luke, taking in how comfortable he looked in the situation. She really admired how easygoing he was compared to her. It was their first date, but his demeanor made it seem like they'd been seeing each other for months. Meanwhile, her heart hadn't stopped racing since she opened the door minutes before.
Luke picked up his fork, flashing her a grin before taking his first bite. His eyes widened and he let out a pleased hum, "Holy shit, this is so good."
"You like it?"
"Are you kidding? This is like the best dessert I've ever had... don't tell my mom I said that. But really, Amélie, you've ruined all other pies for me. Can I take some home to show Jack?"
"Of course! I'm glad you like it. Is my mom's recipe."
"You should probably teach me how to make this, so I don't have to beg you every time I want some."
"I wouldn't mind," she giggled, taking a bite of her own slice. The taste reminded her of home and she suddenly felt a lot less nervous about messing up her English in front of Luke. They continued to eat their pie as they talked, shifting the conversation to more personal topics, wanting to know everything about each other.
Luke told stories about growing up with his brothers, sharing embarrassing moments from their childhoods and the occasional hockey-related mishap. Amélie found herself laughing more than she had since she'd arrived in America, her body filling with warmth.
"And that's how Jack ended up chipping his tooth. Our mom was furious, but Quinn and I thought it was hilarious," Luke explained, shaking his head at the memory.
She laughed, her shoulders shaking. "You and your brother... troublemakers," she teased, resting her chin on her hand as she listened to him talk. God, she could listen to Luke talk for hours. His accent was the cutest thing she'd ever heard and his smile curved up more on one side than the other, almost like a smirk. He was so perfect.
"Yeah, we were. Still are, I guess. But what about you? You got any fun stories about your family?"
"One time my dad, he take us to Montréal for a Habs game. And my older brother he had... he liked one girl he saw. But she was anglophone, no French. He goes up to her and he tries to talk English. But it was soooo bad. Even worse than me. He only knew maybe like three word. I think he said like 'Hey, you pretty, drink?' and she looked at him like he was... insane! He... he panicked and ran away. We bullied him for years after. Our dad, he will still talk about it at dinner sometime."
"That's brutal," Luke laughed. "Glad our first conversation didn't go like that."
"I am just better than him."
Luke shook his head, flashing his lopsided smile that made Amélie swoon. "Clearly. You've got the charm, no doubt about it."
"Maybe a little. But still I get nervous. When you arrive, I think maybe that I would die."
"You hid it well. I didn't even notice. I was the nervous one."
"You? Nervous?" she raised an eyebrow, placing her fork between her lips .
"Yeah, you were... well you are, like the prettiest girl I've ever met," he rubbed the back of his neck. "Didn't want to mess it up."
"Is that a joke? You did not... mess up. I like talking with you."
"I like talking with you too, Amélie"
~~
It was their fourth date and they were back at Amélie's apartment. Luke was sprawled out on the couch, his feet propped up on the coffee table as he playfully scrolled through one of Amélie's French-to-English learning apps.
"Come on, give me a word," Luke teased, turning to look at the girl sitting beside him with her legs tucked under her.
"Alright. Alright. Um... try... 'papillon.'"
Luke squinted, trying his hardest to translate it. "Papillon," he reapted slowly. "Uh... sounds like pasta, maybe? Wait, no, wait... um, balloon?"
She let a burst of laughter, learning back against the arm of the couch. "Non! It's butterfly!"
He groaned dramatically, throwing his head back in mock anguish. "Butterfly?! That doesn't even sound like butterfly! What?!"
"You are needing more practice," she giggled, comfortly placing a hand on his thigh.
Luke's eyes widened at her touch, but he couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, clearly I need a lot more practice. You might have to become my full-time tutor."
Amélie smiled, her fingers lingering on his thigh, sending a warmth through both of them. They'd been spending more and more time together, and things were less awkward, but still full of nervousness. The banter between them was easy, but there was an ever-growing tension gnawing at them both.
Luke reached for a throw pillow next to him, lightly tossing it at her. "Give me another one. I swear I'll get it this time."
She swatted the pillow away, but her focus had moved on from French. The space between them had slowly been shrinking and she had just noticed how close they were. She tilted her head, her eyes flickering up to meet Luke's. "I think... maybe you are better at other things than French."
Luke's grin faltered, his breath catching in his throat at her new tone. He glanced down at her hand still resting on his thigh, then back at her face, then back to her hand again. "Oh yeah? Like what?"
"Like... this."
Before he could question what she meant, she leaned in, her lips brushing his, testing the waters. The kiss was soft, hesitant, but the second their lips connected, everything they'd been holding back snapped into place.
Luke's hands moved to her waist, pulling her closer. The kiss deepened quickly, no longer hesitant, but instead filled with the feelings they'd been dancing around for weeks. Amélie sighed against his mouth, her hands sliding up to his chest, gripping his shirt in his fists. Luke groaned softly, the sound muffled by her lips.
Their kisses turned hungrier, more urgent, as the tension in the room built. Luke shifted, gently pushing Amélie back against the couch as he leaned over her, his body pressing against hers as their kisses grew sloppier. Her hands tangled in his hair, pulling him closer, and Luke's hands slid up to cradle her face, his thumb brushing her cheek as the kiss deepened.
Neither of them wanted to pull away, not wanting to be the first to end the kiss. Luke realized he couldn't hold his breath any longer. He gasped for air before kissing her again, harder this time, his lips moving with more urgency than before. Amélie let out a soft, breathless moan in reponse.
They pulled away again, their foreheads resting against each other as they tried to catch their breath. Luke brushed a strand of her hair, that had gotten stuck between them, out of her face. His eyes were still half-closed as he whispered, "I've wanted to kiss you for so long."
Amélie smiled, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she tried to fill her lungs with air. She looked up at him, her lips still tingling. "Me too. I... I did not expect it to feel... like that."
"Good or bad?"
"Good," she whispered, her fingers tracing the back of his neck before pulling him in again, her lips finding his once more. There was no hesitation this time, just unfiltered desire as they gave in to the kiss.
~~
"Where you goin'?" Jack asked, pausing his video game as he heard Luke head for the door. He turned around, noticing his brother wearing his Michigan backpack. "And why do you have a backpack?"
"Amélie's place. I'm spending the night."
"Damn, Lukey boy's finally getting laid."
"Shut up, Jack... there's no confirmation that that's what happening. She just asked if I wanted to sleep over."
Jack smirked, leaning back on the couch with a knowing look. "Uh-huh, sure. You don't pack a bag just to sleep over, bro."
Luke rolled his eyes, adjusting the straps of his bag. "It's not like that. We're just hanging out, maybe watching a movie or something."
Jack snorted. "Yeah, okay. Whatever you say, lover boy. But just in case, be safe."
"It's not like that," Luke groaned, grabbing his keys off the counter, trying to escape Jack's teasing.
"I'm just saying! Good luck, bud!"
Luke mumbled to himself as he stepped into the hallway, heading for the elevator to the parking garage. His heart was racing more than usual, not just because of Jack's teasing but because tonight did feel different. Spending a night together was a big step in their relationship, especially since they weren't officially official yet.
They hadn't even discussed labels yet, and although they were very close, there was an unspoken worry of figuring out where things were heading. Luke really, really liked her, but he didn't want to rush anything. If Amélie wanted to take things slow, then he would take things slow.
He sat in his car, getting ready to leave when his phone buzzed.
Just picked out a movie. Hope you like rom-coms ;)
Only if we watch it in French so I can practice
Deal.
When he pulled up to her building, he practically leaped out of the car, taking his backpack with him. He knocked on her door, his heart in his throat.
Just go with the flow. No pressure
Amélie giggled when she opened the front door, dressed in one of Luke's Devils hoodies and a pair of shorts he couldn't see from under the large sweatshirt.
"Hey. You look cute," he leaned down to kiss her.
"Hey! Missed you."
"It's only been three days," he laughed, allowing her to wrap her arms around his waist, propping her chin on his chest. "You ready for my horrible French?"
"Ready for anything," she giggled as he ran a hand through her hair.
They stood in the doorway for a few moments more, before she grasped his hand and pulled him into the living room. They settled on the couch, a blanket thrown over their entwined legs.
"Am, I've been thinking..." his thumb brushing lightly against her thigh. "I don't want to overthink it anymore than I already have, but... we've been spending lots of time together. And I really like you."
"I like you too, Luke. A lot."
"Good. Because... I want this to be official. I mean, us. I want us to be official. I don't wanna be just 'hanging out' or 'seeing where things go' anymore. I want you to be my girlfriend." His voice softened at the end, his heart out on a silver platter just for her.
"You really want that?" she gushed.
Luke nodded, "Yeah. I want you. I want... us."
"I want that too," she smiled, shuffling impossibly closer to him, pecking his lips.
Luke pulled her back in for a deeper kiss, relief flooding his body. When they pulled apart, Amélie rested her forehead against his, her fingers gripping the front of his hoodie.
"So, it is official?" she whispered.
"Officially official. You're my girlfriend now."
She kissed him again, laughing into his mouth. "Well... now that we have... figured that out. You have French to practice... boyfriend."
"Let's get started then, girlfriend."
~~
"So... when do I get to meet her?" Jack grinned, knocking Luke's shoulder.
"Oh, um, I can ask her."
Jack raised an eyebrow. "You can ask her?" he teased. "What, you haven't mentioned me?"
Luke sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "I have, Jack. I just... didn't think you'd be so excited."
"Dude, of course I'm excited! My little brother has a girlfriend now! And you know I've gotta approve, see if she's good for you. Duh."
"She's not a test subject, Jack. I'm not bringing her so you can interrogate her."
Jack snickered, loving how flustered his brother was getting. "Relax, I'll be nice. In fact, bring her out with us and the guys this weekend. Some of the other girlfriends will be there."
"I can ask her. Just... don't be weird about it. She get's nervous."
"Me? Weird about it? Never. I'm charming."
"That's what I'm worried about."
"Come on, it'll be fun. She'll get to meet everyone, and you know the guys will love her. Plus, if she can survive a night out with us, she's a keeper."
"Look, I'll ask. But I know she's been busy with schoolwork. I'll ask her tonight. But seriously, Jack, don't freak her out. Please."
"Scout's honour, man. I'll be on my best behaviour."
"You're not a-- never mind. I'll let you know what she says."
~~
Luke laid next to Amélie in her bed, his arm draped over her waist. She was scrolling through TikTok, laughing at French words he didn't know yet. He pressed a kiss to her bare shoulder, peeking at the screen where some girl was speaking rapid French while doing her make up.
"Hey, Am."
"Hmm?"
"So... Jack and some of the guys are going out this weekend, and a few of the girlfriends will be there too," he paused, thinking over his next words. "Jack was, uh, wondering when he could meet you. He kind of suggested you come along."
She blinked, "Meet... all of your friends? This weekend?"
"No pressure! If you're too busy with school, I totally get it. I just thought it might be fun. Only if you want to, of course," Luke quickly added.
She bit her lip, thinking it over, and Luke could tell she was weighing her options. "I'm nervous. I would... like to meet Jack. To be... part of your world."
He pulled her body closer to his, pressing more kisses to her shoulder. "You're already part of my world, Am. And trust me, Jack's been bugging me about meeting you since our first date. He's... well, he's Jack. But he means well."
"Okay. I will come. But if Jack, he makes me feel awkward, you owe me a very good dinner."
Luke laughed, "Deal. And don't worry, I'll be there the whole time. Plus, survivng Jack means you can survive anything."
~~
"C'est très cute, non?" Amélie asked, showing her outfit off to Luke.
"You look like a millon bucks, baby," he replied, leaning down to kiss her.
"What?"
"It's... it's a saying."
She tilted her head slightly, repeating the words back to herself. "A million... bucks."
Luke thought her accent made it all the more adorable. "It means you look beautiful. Like super, super beautiful."
"English says, they are so strange. First you tell me it rains cats and dogs... now I look like I am money. You explain me all of these sometimes, yes?"
"Of course, baby. But I mean it, you looks amazing."
"Thanks, Lu. We should go?"
"If we have to," Luke pouted, leaning down to give her another kiss.
~~
Amélie gripped the straps of her purse so tightly that her knuckles were white. She had never felt so nervous in her life, not even on their first date. She had so many people to impress tonight and probably less than half the words they had in their vocabularies.
Luke was quick to notice her anxiety. She usually walked with so much confidence, but her posture was slumped and her lip was held between her teeth. "Hey, you okay?"
She nodded, but her choked voice betrayed her. "I... I don't know if I can do this."
"You'll be fine, Am," he whispered, brushing his thumb over her cheek. "Jack's going to love you, I can promise you that. And it's just a few of the guys--nothing big. And hey, some of them aren't even native English speakers themselves."
Her eyes were still full of uncertainty, her fingers busying themselves by picking at the skin around her nails. "But maybe I will say something wrong. Or they ask me things, and I do not understand them? Or they will all laugh at me."
"You've been doing so well with your English, love. And if you're ever feeling stuck, just squeeze my hand and I'll come to your rescue."
The bar was pretty empty for the most part, just a few tables of friends talking and sharing drinks. In the back corner, Jack was sitting with a few of the other guys and their better halves.
"There they are!" Jack cheered as soon as he saw them approaching, standing up to greet his brother as if he hadn't seen him in weeks. His tone was loud and confident, and Amélie could feel every set of eyes at the table move towards her and Luke.
Luke gave his brother a quick bro-hug before turning to his girlfriend. "Jack, this is Amélie. Am, this is my brother, Jack."
Amélie felt like all the moisture in her mouth had disappeared, her hand gripping Luke's with a vice-like strength. She opened her mouth to speak, but all her words got stuck. "I, uh, I... hi."
"Nice to meet you, Amélie," Jack said. "Luke's told me loads about you."
She gave him a tight lipped smile, her mind scrambling to find a response, but nothing came. She felt like the weight of everyone's expectations were holding her down. She wanted to wow everyone with perfect English, but all she could do was stand there, frozen.
"She, uh, she's a little nervous," Luke interjected. "Amélie's from Québec, she's here in Jersey to learn English. But her French is like the most impressive shit ever."
"No worries. We're just happy you're here," Nico spoke up.
Amélie forced a smile, but it didn't reach her eyes. She sat down beside Luke, her hand still gripping his with immense force. The conversation around the table picked back up, but she remained quiet.
The guys were easygoing, laughing and joking with each other, and the other girlfriends seemed just as relaxed. The more they spoke though, the harder it became for her to follow. She could pick up on bits and pieces of what was going on, but she couldn't seem to form a complete sentence in her head.
"So, how do you like Jersey so far?" one of the other girlfriends, Lexi, asked with a warm smile.
"It... it's very different. But I... I like it," she replied, her eyes not leaving Luke's hand in her lap.
"She thinks back home is wayyyy prettier. Right, babe?" Luke helped to direct her.
"Yes. Québec is very beautiful."
"So what brought you here?" Jack asked, desperately wanting to know more about the girl that had stolen his brother's heart. "School?"
She bit her lip, trying her best to think of how to reply in English. "Yes... I.... study at Rutgers. Exchange."
"That's awesome. What're you studying?"
Her mind went completely blank. She'd even rehearsed answering that exact question, but now, with everyone looking at her, the words were gone. Her hand tightened around Luke's again, taking a sip of water to clear her throat.
"She's studying communications and media. But the point of her exchange is to work on her English skills."
"That's sick," Jack nodded along.
The conversation around her continued, a few questions being tossed her way but her responses were usually just a few words, the gaps being filled in by Luke. The group eventually moved on to a story that Nico was telling, and Amélie used the shift of attention to shrink into herself further. She let Luke rest his hand on her bouncing knee in an attempt to calm her nerves, but his touch felt foreign in the situation.
After what felt like hours, but had most likely only been half an hour, she leaned close to Luke, whispering in his ear. "Je vais aux toilettes." She stood up before he could respond, scurrying off to the bathroom.
Jack shot Luke a curious glance, but he just shrugged, trying to mask his own worry.
Amélie slipped into the bathroom, pressing her hands against the sink as she stared at her reflection in the mirror. She felt like she was suffocating, her eyes burning with unshed tears. She hated feeling like an outsider, not being able to connect with Luke's world outside of her.
She wiped under her eyes, praying that her mascara didn't run. She didn't want anyone to know she'd been crying in the bathroom. She just wanted to be like the other girls at the table--relaxed and confident, going with the flow of the conversation.
With one last deep breath, she made her way back to the table. Luke looked up at her as she approached. He could tell something was off.
"Everything okay?"
She just nodded, falling back into her silence at the table. She laughed when everyone else laughed, smiling politely when someone made a remark towards her. Luke had never seen her so quiet in his life, not even on the first day that they met. By the time everyone had left the bar, her anxiety was so bad she thought she might puke.
Luke opened the car door for her, and she slid in, staring blankly out the window. The silence between them was heavy. Luke could feel it too, his fingers tapping nervously on the steering wheel.
"Am, what's wrong? You've been quiet all night. You barely said a thing."
The tears that she had been fighting so hard to keep at bay finally spilled out. "I... I feel so stupid. I-I couldn't even talk to them. I couldn't even... act normal."
He reached out, placing a hand on her thigh. His heart clenched at her words. "You're not stupid, Am. You're doing amazing. You're learning a whole new language, that's huge."
"But I had to have you help on everything. I could... not even answer Jack's questions. They normally think... I'm dumb. Not good for you." She wiped at her eyes, frustrated with herself for crying.
"Amélie, baby. No one thinks you're dumb. And you are more than good enough for me--don't you ever doubt that. Jack loved meeting you. Everyone did. I could tell. They don't care if you need some help speaking English. Hell, some of those guys could use the help speaking English."
"I wanted... to be better. To show I can do this. But I feel...lost."
"You don't have to show anyone that you can do anything. Not to me, not to Jack, not to anyone. I love you for--"
"You love me?"
"Of course I do, Am. I... I didn't want to admit it like this. But... I am so in love with you, Amélie."
"I love you too, Luke. Sorry if I... embarrass you tonight."
"You could never embarrass me, Am. Never ever."
"I-"
"Nope, that's enough out of you. Let's go back to yours and watch that stupid cop show you like."
"Mensonges?"
"If that's what it's called, then yes."
"I love you, Lu."
"I love you too, Am."
~~
"I don't know, Jack. She was so nervous last time..."
"But last time there were other people there too. Just tell her you've got the place to yourself for the night and then I'll walk in a couple hours later and be like 'Oh! Sorry, my plans got cancelled.' And then we can all hangout," Jack suggested.
"I'm not going to lie to her. I'll just ask if she wants to spend the night."
"Come on, Rusty! You know I'm just trying to help her relax around me. You're making it sound like a big deal. It's not! She's your girlfriend, and I want to get to know her. Plus, I'll make it fun! I'm good with people."
"I appreciate the thought, Jack. But I want her to feel comfortable, not tricked. So I'll just ask her if she wants to come over and spend the night. No tricks."
"Fine, fine. Let me know what she says."
"I will. Just... don't be an idiot."
~~
Amélie followed Luke into his apartment, her backpack thrown over his shoulder. She looked around, noticing how painfully obvious it was that two men lived there.
"I'm just gonna put your bag in my room. You wanna go make yourself comfortable on the couch?"
"Sure."
She sat down, curling her legs under herself, glancing around the living room. She picked up the remote off the coffee table, fiddling with while she waited for Luke.
"You good?"
"Yeah. Just... taking in. It is very... you."
"What, you mean messy?"
She giggled, then tension in her shoulders disappearing. "Maybe... un peu."
"Hey, it's organized chaos, baby. I know where everything is. Well... most of the time."
"I like it. Feels... comfortable. Like you."
"That's all I want, babe. For you to be comfortable."
"Where's Jack?"
"Probably in his room. Why? Wanna talk with him?"
Amélie quickly shook her head, her eyes widening. "No, no... just wonder. I don't want to... bother him."
"You're not bothering him. He's probably playing video games or doing some stupid shit. He'll come out here eventually."
The last time she'd been around Jack, she hadn't been able to shake her nerves. Tonight, she was determined to make a better impression, even if she still felt like puking.
Luke gently nudged her with his elbow. "Hey, you're good, Am. Jack's chill. You don't have to be nervous."
"I know... just... want him to like me."
"He already likes you," Luke reassured, brushing a strand of hair from her face. "He wouldn't shut up about how cool you were after the last time."
"Really?"
"Yes, really. I wouldn't lie to you, silly."
"Love you, Lu."
"Love you too," he leaned in to kiss her when footsteps pulled them apart.
"Aww, did I interrupt a moment?" Jack's teasing voice came from the doorway.
"Relax, Jack. We were just talking... about you."
"Oh yeah?" Jack pushed himself off the wall, making his way to the couch. "All good things, I hope."
"Duh," Luke squeezed Amélie's hand, allowing her to rest her head on his shoulder. "Amélie was just asking what you were up to."
"Probably nothing interesting compared to you lovebirds. Was talking to Trevor--can't let Luke get ahead of me in the whole having a life department."
She tried to think of a quick response to his joke, but came up with nothing she deemed funny enough.
"Luke tells me you like studying here cause it's different. How so?"
"Um, everything... is feeling bigger here. The city, the campus. And obviously... English. There is like... zero English in my town. We use some words... but not lots."
"Well, seems like you're doing great. Don't stress it. Plus you've got this guy," he gestured to Luke, "to help you out, right?"
She blushed, "Yes, Lu is... super."
Luke grinned, leaning in and whispering, "Told you he likes you."
~~
"I don't know how I'm gonna survive without you, Am," Luke admitted, wiping the tears from his face. His usually calm, relaxed demeanor was gone, replaced with a raw vulnerability.
Amélie had told herself she wasn't going to cry, but seeing Luke cry made that impossible. Her tears had started as soon as his had. "You will, Lu. You are so strong. And... I will not be gone forever."
He shook his head, intertwining their fingers. "I know, but... shit's gonna feel so different without you here. I'm used to having you here all the time. And now I won't see you until summer. I don't know how to do that."
"You'll have Jack, the guys, your family. I'm just... a plane away. We will FaceTime, and before you know... I am back. And I will meet Quinn... and your parents."
Luke rested his head in her lap, letting her run her fingers through his hair. She could feel his tears soaking the fabric of her jeans. "I'm gonna miss you so fucking much, Am."
"I'll miss you too, Lu. So, so much."
They stayed like that for a long time, just wrapped in each other's embraces. Neither of them wanted to let go. Neither of them wanted to admit how hard the next few months would be. They just wanted to stay together... forever.
~~
Amélie was sitting at her desk, her phone propped up against her water bottle as Luke's face filled the screen. His hair was a mess and his eyes drooping. She could tell he had just gotten home from practice.
"Hey, beautiful," he greeted.
"Hey, you," she replied, resting her chin on her hand. "How was practice?"
"Exhausting," he groaned. "But seeing your face makes it better."
Amélie blushed, biting her lip as she smiled. Before she could respond, she heard her brothers' voices coming from down the hall.
"Ah, c'est qui, Amélie?" (who is it, Amélie?)
"Son chum?" the other laughed. (her boyfriend?)
"Ahhh, mais Luke, t'es ben chix." (Ahhh, but Luke, you're so hot.)
"Ferme ta gueule!" Amélie shouted. (Shut your mouth!)
Luke burst out laughing at the look on his girlfriend's face. "What're they saying?"
She huffed, rolling her eyes. "They're being idiots. Teasing me about you."
"Teasing, huh?" He raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. "What did they say? Come on, tell me."
She sighed, getting closer to the camera with a small smirk. "They said you're... how would that translate.... that you're 'hot.'"
"Oh, did they know? You must have good pictures of me hanging up then, huh?"
"They're just being annoying. They think it's funny to tease me because I love an American."
"Well, tell them I appreciate the compliment. And tell them I say 'hi'," he teased.
Amélie shook her head but shouted, "Luke dit bonjour!"
From the hallway, her brothers responded with exaggerated greetings in their broken English, making the couple laugh.
"They're something else, huh? I can't wait to meet them one day."
"They'll probably want you to ask Cole for free Habs tickets. But... in a few weeks, I'll be back and I'll get to meet all of your family."
Luke's eye lit up at the thought. "I know! I've been counting down the days, baby. I can't wait for you to be here again!"
"Me neither. Excited to meet Quinn and your parents."
"Yeah, my mom's super excited to meet you!"
"I'm a little nervous though."
"Don't be! They are gonna love you so much, Am!"
"I love you, Lu."
"I love you more, Amélie. Only a few more weeks, then we'll be together again. I can't wait."
"You promise?"
"I promise. And I'm gonna spoil you so much. Just you, me, and the lake."
"Can't wait."
253 notes · View notes
kingluffy5 · 9 months
Note
GRRRRR IMAGINE TAILUNG ( from kungfu panda ) WITH a leopard reader who has a smaller body than him, LIKE IMAGINE WITH THE SIZE DIFFERENCE HOW NICE CUDDLING WOULD BEEEE
All right so obviously I have to change some things around in terms of story. In this Tai Lung when finding out he is not the Dragon Warrior decides to continue training at the Jade Palace as a master, he is considerably less violent but will still be sassy, and in this au he is actually good friends with Po. This one will be small do to a lack of specificity on what you want and nothing to really base off of.
Tai Lung x Leopard Reader (GN)
Tai Lung has been training for a while and Y/N just wants to cuddle
3rd Person P.O.V.
Sounds of kung fu could be heard from the pool of sacred tears as Master Tai Lung was training with the Dragon Warrior, Po.
“If that is all you can do Panda I just might claim the title of Dragon Warrior yet,” Tai Lung jokingly mocked as the two dueled.
“Don’t start thinking this fight is over just yet Tai Lung, KICK OF AWESOMENESS!!!!” Po yelled as he kicked at Tai Lung’s stomach.
“Po you know I can easily block that right?” Tai Lung said as he flips Po over him.
“Yeah but it gives me the chance to do this,” Po revealed as he stepped on Tai Lungs tail.
“AHH! Mother of - ”
“Tai Lung are you still training!” A voice yelled, one that is able to strike fear into the hearts of legendary warriors such as Tai Lung, Po, and even Master Shifu himself.
1st Person P.O.V.
Here I am walking all the way up to the pool of sacred tears when Tai Lung said he would be done training hours ago, after the recent attack on the Valley by Kai he started training more and more and it is like I barely see him any more. I get he wants to train to protect the people of the Valley but I still want him to come home before I go to sleep.
Once I get to the top of the mountain I see Po and Tai Lung shivering which is weird because even if we are this high up it is still pretty warm out.
“You promised to be home hours ago,” I angrily reminded my partner.
“I’m sorry dear you see we just lost track of time,” He said honestly and guiltily.
“Heroes of the Valley my butt you two would lose your heads without me and Shifu here to make sure you don’t overwork yourselves come,” The statement came from a place of care as me and Tai Lung were partners in every way, romantically, as well as in Kung Fu. While I do not train in the ancient art and am smaller than the likes of him and Po, and would likely easily lose most fights, I make sure Tai Lung takes care of himself.
“You’re right dear, let’s go home and rest,” He suggested.
— — —
We ate dinner in silence and were now in bed, also in silence.
“Are you still made at me Y/N?” He asked.
I growled in response, confirming his question.
“I’m sorry that we were training for so long, and I know it probably does not make up for it but we did genuinely lose track of time,” He apologized.
“But why do you have to train so much? I want you to be home more,” I asked.
“When Kai attacked I was almost powerless to stop him, I didn’t want to have that feeling of you not being safe anymore, I want to always be able to protect you,” He said.
I suddenly curl up into him and bury my face into his chest, “Just shut it you big lug,”
463 notes · View notes
inbloomwriting · 4 months
Text
Everything to me - Chapter 2
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Chapter two - Blueberry & Kidney Bean
Chapter 1
Plot: Jamie Tartt is a lot of things: professional footballer, the island's top scorer .... sexually, extremly handsome. But one thing he never saw himself as was a dad. Too bad he has to deal with the consequences of his own actions. This fic follows reader and Jamie as they navigate life and turn from practially strangers to parents. Pairing: Jaime Tartt x female reader Warnings: Pregnancy, swearing, mentions of food and alcohol, slight mention of sexual intimacy (nothing graphic), strained/toxic parental relationship Notes: 5.6k words. I do not have a set uploading schedule. Please bear with me as I work on this story. I know hardly anything about pregnancy, all my information comes from google. I tagged everyone who asked me to do it when I posted part 1. Please let me know if you want to be taken off or added to the taglist. Likes, reblogs, comments are all much appreciated. I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please
The store smells like dust and cardboard and old carpet. It's not necessarily a bad smell, it just doesn't live up to her memories.
She remembers the perpetual scent of menthol cigarettes and some kind of cheap men's perfume wafting through the air. The store used to smell like her dad and now it doesn't. And that just makes it all even more real.
Boxes upon boxes litter the room, filled with records. Some older, some newer. Guitars adorn one wall while the others are covered in posters from tours that happened long ago, some even before she was born.
There is something comforting about being here. It’s like stepping back into the past. Long nights watching Dad and his friends play their guitars after store-closing. Discovering new bands whenever a new shipment of records came in. And yes - she is the first to admit that in her younger years, she mostly chose the records by how cool the cover looked. 
It’s also memories of Dad getting caught up in the after-hours jam sessions and forgetting about her dance recital and that one time he threw a guitar at the window out of anger that a shipment of records got lost. It took him months to get the window replaced. She could probably still trace exactly where the crack used to be. 
Being here is very reminiscent in all the good and bad ways. But it’s a warped version of the past. One that’s laced with all the knowledge she has now. Like a movie that you’ve seen a million times.
“I don’t think pregnant women are supposed to be doing that!” 
Jamie’s voice cuts through the nostalgia-induced fog like a sunbeam through the clouds. And it also gives her a little heart attack as the only sound filling the room up until now had been her moving around and the soft tunes of an Eric Clapton record playing in the background.
“Jesus fuck! You scared me. I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to startle pregnant women either and give them heart attacks.” 
He looks at her with those big expressive eyes of his and a comically overdone pout on his lips. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. But seriously give me that.” 
He’s so quick to take the box of records from her hands (Y/N) hardly has time to process what’s going on. 
Quite honestly, his worry is a bit misplaced here but she appreciates the sentiment even if he might be a little overly cautious at that moment. It feels nice to be cared for. 
“You know I’m pregnant, not sick, right? I can carry stuff.” 
“Yeah but why would you if you got me carrying it for you?” 
He has a point, she has to give him that. 
“Fair enough. Those go over there in the corner please.” 
Jamie follows her order without hesitation and, after setting the box down in its designated place, his eyes dart across the room and light up with childlike wonder and curiosity.
“This used to be your dad’s place, yeah? It looks really neat with all them posters and shit. Like stepping into an old person’s mind but like a cool old person that buys you alcohol when you’re 15 and lets you watch horror movies when your mum said no.” 
Of all the adjectives in the world, (Y/N) wouldn’t ever think of using the word “cool” to describe her dad. He was creative and fun and eccentric and stubborn — but cool? 
Then again he was her dad and no one ever likes to think of their own parents as cool. Oh god, will their kid think she’s uncool?! 
“Uh yeah, the shop and the apartment right above us. He owned it, now I do. I’m trying to get it all fixed up and ready to be sold.”
“What? Why?” 
There is something to be said about Jamie’s face and his absolute inability to mask his emotions. Everything he thinks and feels is mirrored twice as vividly on his face. He’s all furrowed brows and pouty lips. 
“I mean — it’s a record store. People don’t really buy records anymore. Be honest, when was the last time you bought one instead of just streaming the music?” 
“Like two weeks ago.” 
“Fuck off, no you didn’t!” 
“Uh — yeah, I did. Olivia Rodrigo if you must know.” 
A soft giggle falls from (Y/N)’s lips. How fitting for Jamie to buy an album full of teenage angst. 
“Well, you’re one of very few people though. In a perfect world, I wouldn’t have to sell. I’d keep it open. Instead of selling instruments, it’d turn that part of the shop into a little stage with a coffee counter or a bar. Host open mic nights and shine a spotlight on undiscovered artists. But the world isn’t perfect and there is no way I can afford to turn that vision into reality so really there’s no use in letting myself get too caught up in it.” 
There is pity in his eyes and she hates it. She doesn’t want pity, not his or anyone else’s. Has seen enough of it, especially lately. If she had received just one more “Sorry for your loss” card in the mail from relatives she hadn’t seen in decades, she probably would’ve stabbed a fork in her own eye. Pity does no good to no one. 
“Anyway, Jamie. Not that I don’t enjoy hanging out with you, it’s kind of necessary if we want to get this whole beings-friends-thing right, but uh — what are you doing here?” 
“Jesus, can’t a guy just come around to say hi to his baby? “ 
She thinks the way he says the word “Baby” in his thick accent is surprisingly and undeniably adorable. As if it ends in an “eh” instead of a “y”.
“By the way, they’re as big as a blueberry now.” 
And the way he’s keeping track of the baby's growth gets her right in the heart. For some reason, this seems to come so naturally to him when it all still feels weird and foreign and surreal to her. As if it were happening to someone else and she’s just a mere spectator. The idea that something as small as a blueberry will one day turn into a proper baby, a child, a teenager … a whole ass adult - is so wild to her. Almost incomprehensible. A person with their own feelings and dreams and personality. (Y/N) wonders if at any point in this pregnancy, she'll wake up and it'll all just make sense or if that only comes once she's holding the baby in her arms.
“That's cute. Doesn't answer my question though. What brings you here?”
A shadow of something flickers across Jamie’s face. Something unreadable and unfamiliar. Something that makes (Y/N) feel a sense of dread bubbling up in her stomach.
“I uh — I can’t do this.”
And there it is. That unfamiliar shadow is now a metaphorical atom bomb, a mushroom cloud of all that could have been and won’t be.
“Oh okay. I mean no, not okay. This sucks actually. You said you wanted to be part of the baby’s life and now you’re bailing? That’s a shit move, Jamie. You’re a right prick for pulling that crap.” 
“What? Oh no!” his eyes widen as the realization sets in. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Well then what did you mean? Cause you’re truly giving me a heart attack right now. Second one for today. You really need to start working on your conversation starters.” 
She had given him the chance to opt out of being a dad, to not be a part of the baby’s life. It seemed like the right thing to do and, foolishly, (Y/N) had believed that she’d be okay with him doing just that. In this very moment though, she feels everything but okay. The idea of Jamie changing his mind is terrifying. 
Sometimes you don’t realize just how much you need something — or someone until you’re faced with the possibility of losing them.
“I mean, I can’t do this alone. I need to tell someone. All I keep thinking about is the baby and I feel like I am going to explode any second now. I know we can’t tell everyone yet ‘cause of — well you know, things going wrong and stuff. But I need to tell someone. You got to tell Rebecca and your mum, I think it’s only fair I get to tell two people as well, yeah?”
A sense of relief floods her. Starts in her toes and fills her all the way to the top of her head. He wants this — wants the baby. It’s not just her in this. It’s nice to know you have someone in your corner. It’s also scary. Because he deserves to know just whose team he’s on. And being vulnerable fucking sucks. 
“Jamie, that’s fine. Absolutely you can tell your mum.” 
“And Simon? You got two people so — “
“I didn’t though.” 
“Uh yes, you did. I know you told Rebecca.” 
“That’s right.”
“And your mum too”.
The silence that follows his words is deafening. Being vulnerable means also admitting guilt. It means owning up to all of your mistakes. Though we are not the sum of our mistakes, they are what help shape the person we become. And (Y/N) really doesn’t think they make her a very good one.
“And your mum too?” 
More silence.
“You didn’t tell your mum? Why not? “
To his credit, Jamie looks truly surprised and confused. There is no judgment there, just absolute bewilderment and that signature softness that rounds out his features and settles in his eyes whenever Jamie talks to her about something serious. Granted they’ve not had that many conversations but she hopes that softness stays. She hopes that maybe their baby can have those soft, gentle eyes too.
“I’m not sure. I think I’m scared. My mum and I have a — complicated relationship. I disappoint her, she judges me. You know, the usual.” 
“You think she’ll be disappointed because we're having a baby? Is it because of me?”
(Y/N) shrugs, breaking eye contact and fixing her gaze on the old grey carpet with the ugly 90s pattern. What if those soft eyes can look straight through her, see all the ugly parts and the insecurities? That’s too scary for now. Too much too soon.
“No, it has nothing to do with you. Think she’ll just be disappointed I didn’t get pregnant according to the timeline she dreamed up for my life when I was like 2 years old. Had it all planned out for me and I never stuck to it.” 
Jamie is quiet for a moment but (Y/N) doesn’t dare to look back up at him. She can’t deal with any more pity.
“Well if you want to practice telling a mum, we can start with mine.”
“Huh?” 
“You can come to Manchester with me if you want. To tell my mum. We’ll have one mum down then, makes it easier to do it a second time. It’s science.” 
Jamie has the fascinating quality of making you believe in his words just by being so undeniably charming and because he believes in them himself. He makes it look easy when it is everything but.
“And if things don’t go well with your mum at least you’ll know you have at least one mum you can rely on, even if it’s not your own. She raised me pretty much by herself so she knows a thing or two about babies and parenting and stuff.” 
The mocking raise of (Y/N)’s right eyebrow doesn’t go unnoticed by Jamie who opens his lips to a silent gasp and clutches his chest with an overly dramatic gesture. 
“What? You saying I didn’t turn out perfectly?”
“No,” she laughs, a lightness festering in her chest. Like the first rays of sunshine after a cold winter that never seemed to end. Like a glass of wine after a long day at work. Like your favorite song on the radio at the exact moment you need it most. “I think you turned out exactly the way you were supposed to.” 
“Thanks,” Jamie says with that cheeky smile playing on his lips that makes him look a little younger than he actually is. Then he dares to wink at her and it’s a little annoying but also insanely charming. “Not sure you meant it as a compliment but I am taking it. Now when are you free for a trip up to Manchester?” 
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(Y/N)’s been on a lot of road trips around the country when she was younger. She’s even spent a whole summer traveling Europe, partially by train but most of the time was spent stuffed in a Fiat Punto with 3 of her friends and all their luggage. It was stuffy, it was chaotic and it was immensely fun. None of those road trips ever involved a shiny black Aston Martin Rapide though. 
Or a famous footballer dressed in the ugliest lime green sweater (Y/N) has ever seen. 
“That’s all the luggage you got?” Jamie questions as he moves the black shades off of his eyes and sets them on the top of his head, holding back some of his hair. It shouldn’t work so well but it does. 
“I mean, we’re only staying for a night right? Why? Should I have brought more? How much did you pack?” 
He glances at her, then towards the car, and back at her. A sheepish look crosses his face before being replaced by his childlike cheekiness. “That’s confidential. Don’t worry about it, yeah?” 
“I got my ginger lollies, that’s all that matters really.” 
“You feeling alright?” 
“Mh, I’m good. Just pregnant.” 
His eyes drop down to her stomach for just a second before he nods his head in what (Y/N) can only describe as a mix of pride and satisfaction. “Yeah, you are.” 
That’s new. Well not new-new but it hasn’t happened since the day of the funeral. That tingly feeling in her stomach that has fuck all to do with the baby and everything with how the baby got there. Yes, Jamie is hot and (Y/N) is the first to admit as much but there has been so much stress and chaos and she hardly had time to think about anything but surviving and making sure not to completely lose herself in bad visions of what-ifs that her brain has had no time to process any feelings of arousal or lust. That look he just gave her though, that one made her remember it for just a second.
“You sure you’re alright?” 
Jamie’s voice shakes her from her daydream and brings her back to the real world, her eyes focusing back on the obscene car parked in front of her tiny apartment building looking so insanely out of place.
“Uh yes, I’m fine. I just — sometimes I forget that you’re famous.” 
Jamie regards her for a moment before shrugging his shoulder and grabbing the bag from her hands. “I don’t. It’s fun. Now come on, let’s goooooo.” 
His voice is dipped in excitement and there’s a bounce in his step. If this is how the prospect of seeing his mother makes him feel and behave, she must be one lovely woman. Whenever (Y/N) thinks of her own mother her chest fills with tiny metaphorical icicles. Sharp and rough and painful. It’s all regret and judgment and disapproval. It’s “You gained weight”, “you look tired”, and “You should really look into getting a new job”. Daggers disguised as roses. Stabs right to the heart in the name of being honest. “I just care about you, because I love you, because I am your mother!” 
If there is one thing (Y/N) knows for sure, it’s that she will never ever find the need to resort to criticism and thinly veiled malice in order to show her child that she cares. They will know. Every single day. Because she’ll make sure to show them. Every single day in all the big and tiny ways a person can show their love. 
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“Kidney Bean?”
“Kidney Bean. And apparently, the baby is sprouting webbed fingers and toes right now. Oh, and it’s starting to move!” 
“Can you feel that?” 
“No, not yet.” 
“It’s mental. Last week she was the size of a blueberry and now she’s a kidney bean. Kid’s growing up too fast.” 
It’s true. There is so much happening all at once and it’s almost impossible to really process it all. Suddenly there is a tiny spark of a human inside her. Not really a baby yet but a baby to her. And it's moving and developing and changing every second of every day. Fucking insane.
“Wait … you said she. You think it’s a girl?”
Maybe it’s the sunlight casting a glow through the windshield but (Y/N) is almost certain she can just about make out a blush dusting Jamie’s cheeks. 
“Dunno.”
“Jamie Tartt, do you want to be a girl dad?” 
He glances at (Y/N) through the corner of his eyes for just a moment but it’s enough for her to see the sincerity in him. This is something he’s thought about before. Learning new things about Jamie is fascinating.
“Ah,  it’s stupid, really. It’s — It’s dumb or whatever.” 
“No, come on, don't go shy on me now. Tell me.” 
He takes a deep breath. A moment passes then another. There is no rush. Sometimes silly thoughts are the result of harsh truths. 
“Told you my dad was a prick. Like the biggest piece of shit walking this earth, yeah? And I knew that all my life. Thing is I still tried to impress him. I just — I wanted him to like me so badly. Just felt wrong that me own dad didn’t care about me and that made me angry. And I kept that anger inside me for so long. Sometimes when I think about the baby and the future I am scared that if I have a son that anger will jump over to him. Like maybe all Tartt men are cursed or some shit like that. But if I had a little girl maybe that would make it easier for me to be a good dad. I don’t mind either way, obviously, but the idea of having a son scares me.” 
It’s the most vulnerable he’s been with her so far and by the way he clenches his jaw and grabs onto the steering wheel just a little tighter, (Y/N) can tell this isn’t easy on him. It means a lot that he shares this part of him with her anyway. It feels like they are actually becoming friends. So opening up to him in return is only half as horrifying. 
“When I was a kid, maybe 11 or 12, I wrote a short story for school and I won an award. They did this big ceremony thing where the 3 finalists got to read their stories out loud for an audience and then receive their prizes. My mum didn’t show up, not sure if it was because she stayed longer at the office and didn’t care enough to leave on time or if she just didn’t feel like getting out of the house. Point is, she wasn’t there. When I came home that night I was sad, obviously, and I was also pissed. Because why the fuck couldn’t she take one night off to come see me succeed at something even if it wasn’t something she deemed worthy of praise. 
So I yelled at her and I’m sure I said some hurtful things. But I was so devastated and angry and I needed an outlet for once. She called me ungrateful but I was used to that, she always called me ungrateful. Then she looked at me with that look of absolute resignation and malice and she said that she hopes I have a daughter like me one day and that she makes me realize how hard it is to love me. 
When I think of the baby, sometimes I see a little girl too. One that I will love so much she never has to doubt it for a single second. And I will also prove my mother wrong. Because it will be so easy to love my little girl and it would’ve been so easy to love me, her little girl.” 
It’s the first time she’s ever said those words out loud. Truly, (Y/N) had not expected for them to come out in an Aston Martin, on the way to meet her baby’s father’s mother but life doesn’t seem to care for plans very much these days.
Softly, as if to not startle her, Jamie places his hand on hers, squeezing gently.
“I think your mum is a right bitch.” 
“Thanks. I think your dad is a huge asshole.” 
“We’re gonna be better than them, right?” 
It’s not really a question. It’s more of a promise.
“We will. I know it.”
His hand doesn’t leave hers for a good long while. 
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The nerves don’t hit her until they pull up to the quaint little house with the white front. There’s a rose bush to the side and some kids playing football just across the way. The nerves don’t hit her until Jamie puts the car in park but when they do, they hit her like a freight train.
“Woah, you alright?” 
“Huh?” 
“You look all pale and like you’ve seen a ghost or something. Do you have to puke?”
A chuckle falls from her lips at the absurdity of it all. In all honesty, she’s not met a lot of parents yet but the few she did meet were parents of actual partners. People she had been dating for a while. It was a natural progression of steps. This is all wrong and sideways and topsy-turvy. You’re supposed to meet the mum first and then get pregnant. 
Again with the life and the plans. 
“I’m fucking nervous.” 
“Hah,” Jamie laughs. The audacity of this guy. “You’re nervous to meet my mum? Why? She’s an angel.”
“Do you not know how intimidating that is? Like, if she was shit I wouldn’t care but she sounds wonderful and I want her to like me. No, I need her to like me. Desperately. And I can only imagine what she thinks of me already. Some floozy who gets knocked up and really just wants your money.” 
Before she even fully realizes what’s happening, (Y/N) feels Jamie’s hands on her cheeks, framing her face in warmth.
“Calm down, please. I promise it’ll be alright. My mum will love you, I know it. Probably more than she loves me. Actually no that’s a lie, but she will love you and she will love our baby. Promise.”
“She’s not gonna judge me for — you know. Getting pregnant even though we’re not dating or anything.” 
“My mum was married to my dad, worst person on planet Earth. Don’t think she’s in any position to judge you. It’ll be alright, trust me.” 
She hardly knows this man and yet she can’t help but do just that. Trust him.
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The first thing (Y/N) notices about Georgie is her smile. A smile that is so familiar because it looks exactly like Jamie’s smile. Warm and radiant and true. A part of (Y/N) hopes that their baby inherits that same smile. Partially because it’s a really good smile and partially because maybe that could help Jamie realize that he is more than the sum of his father’s problems and mistakes. He is all his mother’s boy.
“Oh, I missed you, my baby.” 
Georgie wraps her arms around Jamie’s middle, getting swallowed by his frame for a moment. There’s no denying that part of (Y/N)’s heart breaks a little seeing how loving of a relationship these two have and wondering where she and her own mother went wrong.
And as it so happens with so many kids that have never been loved quite the way they deserved, (Y/N) can’t help but search for the problem in herself. 
“Yeah sorry for not visiting earlier. You know how it is with training and stuff.” 
“Don’t worry about it. I know my boy is busy being a star.” 
The words hold a slight mocking, never mean but in the way that only people who are close can tease each other. You know every word comes laced with deep affection, with pride, with love.
“And it’s so nice to meet you too. I’m Georgie.” 
It takes a second for (Y/N) to realize that Jamie’s mum is now talking to her directly.
“I uh — oh thank you. Nice to meet you too, I’m (Y/N).” 
Georgie smells like mint chewing gum and floral perfume as she pulls (Y/N) into a hug. She’s soft and gentle and it’s been the first hug from a mother (Y/N) has received in quite some time.
“Sorry, didn’t even ask if you’re a hugger.”
“Oh that’s alright, don’t worry about it.” 
She’s not a hugger, never really was, but there is something about Georgie granting her some affection that isn’t all that bad. Maybe their kid can have at least one grandmother who cares and who isn’t completely disgusted by the idea of showing any kind of positive emotions.
“Jamie never brings girlfriends around so I’m a bit out of my element here if I’m being honest.” 
“Mum we’re not — she’s not.” Jamie takes a big breath before starting again “(Y/N) and I are friends, yeah? Told you about it on the phone.” 
“Right, right. Well, you don’t bring around a lot of friends either so same difference, really. Now come inside will you, I’m sure we got a lot to catch up on.”
Oh if only she knew how true that sentiment really is.
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There are pictures of Jamie staring back at (Y/N) from every corner of the house and Georgie leads them through the hallway and towards the kitchen. Every wall and every shelf holds a memory of him at one point in his life. Gap toothed with a football in hand smiling, surrounded by a field of tulips arm wrapped around his mother’s shoulder, his teenage self smoldering at the camera with an even more questionable haircut than the one he is sporting right now. Oh to be loved in a way that every past version of you is being remembered.
As they reach the kitchen a sweet scent fills the room when a man clad in an apron turns around and faces them with a huge smile playing on his face. He has a dorky kind of charm to him that immediately puts you at ease. Maybe it’s just the frilly apron, maybe it’s the big oven gloves, maybe it’s the smile. Either way, (Y/N) thinks that if they take the news well, her kid might have truly lucked out on one side of the grandparents department. 
“Jamie, welcome home.” 
“Hi Simon, thanks, mate. Glad to be back. This is (Y/N).” 
“The friend, right.” Simon says and shoots Georgie a look that neither of them misses. Subtlety doesn’t seem to be one of his best qualities. “It’s nice to meet you, (Y/N).”
“Nice to meet you too. It smells amazing in here.” 
“I found this new recipe for honey blondies. Not sure if they'll be any good but I guess we'll find out. If you guys want to go have a seat, I'll come bring them over.”
“Actually,” Jamie speaks up while nervously fiddling with his hands. “I was hoping we could have a talk before we do anything else. There’s something I need to tell you both.” 
Imagining the hypothetical scenario of telling your mum you’re having a baby and actually doing it really are two completely different things it seems. Gone is all of Jamie’s confidence and replaced with a whole lot of anxiety. 
“You're worrying me, Jamie. What has you acting so serious? Did you get someone pregnant or something?”
Georgie's words are followed by a thick awkward silence. It's heavy and suffocating and it makes (Y/N) feel uneasy in both her heart and her head.
It doesn't take long for Jamie’s parents to realize what his silence means. Everything communicated by not saying a single word.
“Oh, fuck.”
And there's nothing to add to Georgie's reaction. It's the exact same one (Y/N) had when she first saw those faint blue lines.
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Of all the possible outcomes and ways this day could’ve gone, (Y/N) had not expected to find herself staring at not only a curly-haired Roy Kent but also come face to face with two very persuasive arguments belonging to no other than Keeley fucking Jones. 
“This is surreal.” 
The posters stare back at her all crinkled paper and bleached ink, as if to mock her silently. 
“Ah, well I told them to redecorate when I moved out, think they just haven’t gotten around to it yet.” 
A light dusting of pink settles on the apples of Jamie’s cheeks as well as the tips of his ears. This man can’t hide his emotions for the life of him. It’s quite adorable really. 
“Do they know?” 
“Does who know?” 
“Roy and Keeley. Do they know you have their pictures up in your room?”
“Well no and It’s not my room anymore, is it? ‘S not like I have ‘em hanging at home. Put these up ages ago.” 
A giggle slips through (Y/N)’s lips at his desperate attempt to talk himself out of this situation. 
“It’s okay, Jamie. I won’t tell.” 
“There’s nothing to tell, alright?” he responds in mock offense before sitting down on his childhood bed next to (Y/N). “Just liked boobs and football and those two were the best those fields had to offer, yeah? Can’t really blame me.” 
“Not much has changed has it?”
He shrugs his shoulders in response “Nah. Still like boobs and football but no way I’d put up a poster of granddad’s ugly mug nowadays.”
From the few times they talked about his job, including his teammates and coaches, (Y/N) was able to gather that Jamie’s relationship with Roy is something special. Odd, but special. Maybe that’s what happens when you end up working with your childhood idol. Either way, no matter how much shit he likes to talk about him, it’s clear that Jamie respects and admires Roy a great deal still.
“And uh — and Keeley?” 
“What about her?” 
“Is she — are you — how are things?” 
She still remembers that crestfallen look on his face on the day of the funeral. That infinite sadness in his eyes. She hadn’t put two and two together at that moment but later that night it all clicked. Keeley was the woman he was in love with, the woman who did not love him back. And while (Y/N) knows that she and Jamie are only bound together by happenstance and fate — if one chooses to believe in that, and that there is nothing romantic about their situation, it does sting a little to know that the man you’re having a baby with is in love with someone else.
“We’re good. We’re friends, think that’s all we’ll ever be. Her and Roy, they’re happy and I don’t want to ruin it for either of them. Keeley and I just were not right together.” 
“And you’re okay with that?” 
He nods his head, a small smile playing on his lips “Yeah, I’m alright with it. If I hadn’t made a fool of myself at the funeral then you and I wouldn’t have — you know, and then we wouldn’t be having a baby. Little Kidney Bean.” 
“That’s true. Your mum seemed excited.” 
“Hah, sorry about her. She can be intense.” 
Intense might be the understatement of the century. It took her approximately 2.3 seconds to get over the initial shock of the announcement and really process it before Georgie let out a scream of pure excitement and joy and wrapped both Jamie and (Y/N) up in her arms. She didn’t fully let go for a good 20 minutes. It was intense. It was also phenomenal.
“Don’t apologize. I am so glad she took it so well, Simon too. At least now I’ll have the certainty that my baby will have one set of loving grandparents at least.” 
“Hey,” Jamie says and nudges her shoulder with his “We’ll sort out telling your mum next, okay. I’m sure it’ll go better than you think. And if not we can always call up my mum for some more hugs and a pep talk. Whatever happens, you won’t have to do it alone. I promise.” 
For what is probably the first time in her life (Y/N) lets herself believe that there truly is someone else having her back, undisputedly and all the way. It’s unfamiliar. It’s a little scary. It’s also wonderful.
“Thanks, Jamie. I appreciate it, I really do. Think so far we’re doing alright, huh?” 
“I’d say so. Two sexy parents and a little Kidney Bean.” 
Their laughter echoes through Jamie’s childhood bedroom for quite a while longer until at some point it stills and gives room to soft breathing and quiet snores. The bed isn’t meant for two grown adults and really Jamie truly meant to sleep on the couch but somewhere between talks of baby clothes and childhood memories, eyes grew heavy and tired, and soon enough both of them are fast asleep.
Just them and their little Kidney Bean 
— and a curly-haired Roy Kent 
— and Keeley’s boobs.
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taglist (@ me if you want to be taken off or added): @captainfrisbee - @scaramou - @mischiefmanaged71 - @rexorangecouny - @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog - @tweasley20 - @dreamtrydoforkinggood - @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo - @heletsmelovehim - @snubug - @katdahlali - @oldglitterstory - @lalla-04p - @aiyaiy
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asuyaka · 9 months
Note
GUESS WHO'S CLASSES ARE FINALLY OVER GIRLIES💃💃
Damn, it's been a heck of a while since I last came back to this blog--
Anyways! I've been following the new JJK episodes(I am not fine and it's all Mahito's fault.), so to put a bandage on his gap in my chest, how about some reverse comfort shot for our boy Yuuji during the Shibuya arc? Heaven knows he's in need of it. The prompt would be that he's having the meltdown/panic attack after regaining control over his body after Sukuna raised hell on the city(along with all the memories that come with it) and his lover finds him crying on the ground and rushes to comfort him and ground him.
I just want my boy to get a hug goddamn it, Gege won't give him any breaks😭
- Sincerely, '🌈' Anon.
★ - 'm honestly haven't watched the new episode yet (prayin' s'the "I'm you." timeline !!) but, 100% agree! 'm boy needs a break !! (gege is cruel (;′⌒`) )
☆ - Itadori Yuuji x Reader!
♡ - 'm sososososo glad t'see you again 🌈 !! 've lowkey been burnin' out, but 'm glad you're here !! &lt;;33 (〃` 3′〃)| listenin' to... Skyfall
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Good God— you don't know how you're alive right now.
The stench of curses and blood permeated the air, dried blood from curse users and curses stuck your hair to your face; heavy breaths leaving your lips as you looked around for any familiar faces.
Shibuya is in shambles, nothing more and nothing less. Dead civilians and auxiliary managers litter the streets, and several cars and buildings are smashed and flipped on their sides.
"Fuck," you wheeze, holding onto the scar that stretches to two separate sides of your face.
Your ribs are most definitely bruised or broken— there's no doubt about it. Your ankle is a bit sprained and you can't hear anything from your left ear.
You're really looking for Yuuji, you're lovable, and sometimes (a lot of the time) oblivious boyfriend. It's a bit biased, you know. Though Yuuji is at the top of your priority list, you really just want to find anybody who came to Shibuya with Gojo.
An earth-shattering sound makes its way through your ear(s). You turn around sharply, staring in shock as a few inches away from your foot is completely gone.
There's a presence you've felt ever since you woke up and you more or less guessed it was Sukuna.
If you had moved one step ahead, you would've died by what you assumed was Sukuna's domain.
Sukuna.
Your eyes widen as they stare at the crater formed by the King of Curses' domain. There's no way people aren't dead.
Yuuji.
"Oh fuck, Yuuji?!" Your anxiety goes haywire as you force your body to move. Even though every bone in your body aches in pain, pushed to its limit and beyond during the plethora of curses you've fought, you move.
Your heartbeat accelerates as your breaths get shorter. As fast as you run around the perimeter of the crater, you still haven't found Yuuji. Yuuji and his boyish smile every time you get him a gift, Yuuji, and his airy laugh whenever he sees something that manages to get him just right.
Yuuji and, his adorable love for movies, Yuuji, and his bright demeanor, able to make almost anyone fall under his spell.
Yuuji, who you find scratching at the road with tears falling down his eyes, wailing about how he should be the one to die.
It's right then and there, that your heart breaks.
Forgetting about the pain in your body, you rush over to where Yuuji was a heavy exhale, tears brimming your eyes and throbbing pain coursing through your body.
He turns to look at you with eyes that don't look like your boy, that don't look like Yuuji. He looks as if he's seen a ghost —like he didn't expect someone he knew to still be alive.
"You're alive...?" His voice is hoarse like he's dehydrated. It's missing its usual animated tone, his normal light voice, and his smile — fuck his smile.
"Yuuji," You exhale. "Yuuji, you're alive, fuck— you're alive." You get closer, and your body finally collapses on you. You're able to feel the emotions you forced yourself to push down the minute you stepped into the veil encasing Shibuya.
The hurt when you saw people you hold near to your heart die in front of you, the pain every time you felt your bones cracking, or the feeling of your skin stretching to accommodate the wound that was bound to form a scar stretching across your face.
Yuuji backs away from you, his fingers leaving a bloody trail from where you found him scratching at the road. "No! Get away from me— I'll try and kill you too!"
He'll... try and kill you?
Yuuji hangs his head in his arms as he curls into himself, seemingly trying to make his body as small as normal. "I'm nothing but a murderer! No matter what I do— or what I try to do— I just," He interrupts himself with a hiccup, blood mixed with tears leaking from the bottom of his face.
"I can't help anybody! I killed innocent people, I shouldn't be allowed to live!"
Yuuji continues to cry, his bloody fingers gripping his now dirtied pink hair.
Gently, as to not make him pull away from you, your arms wrap around his body. He refuses, trashing in your hold as he begs for you to let go of him, to distance yourself from him in case Sukuna somehow manages to take control again.
"Yuuji." You say softly, letting your coarse arms run through his hair.
He doesn't respond. Though he isn't struggling to move, he still remains unresponsive. "Yuuji, you aren't a monster."
He shakes his head furiously. "I killed them with my own—"
"Sukuna killed them, not you." You mutter softly. Even though you don't know the whole story, you know Yuuji, your Yuuji, would never kill innocent people.
"Yuuji, you aren't a murderer. You aren't a murderer."
Yuuji sobs into your shoulder, his bloody fingers gripping tightly against your shirt. "I'm sorry— I'm sorry!"
You keep your voice soft, softly running through his hair and rubbing circles on his back as well. "It wasn't your fault, 's okay..."
You reassure him, keep telling him that he wasn't a murderer, that he wouldn't kill innocent people on purpose, and little by little you think he's believing you.
"We, we have to go find everyone else," Yuuji says. His voice is drier if that's possible and his eyes feel so sunken, they don't feel like Yuuji. You don't hold that against him, he just went through a traumatic experience and obviously he isn't going to be the same boy you're used to.
Your shoulder is wet, and Yuuji's blood is staining your back. "Are you sure you're okay?"
Yuuji nods. Though it doesn't feel all the way true, it doesn't feel fake either. You press a tiny peck on his cheek, showing him a smile to let him know that he isn't alone.
As long as you were there with him, he'll never be alone.
"Fushiguro is... is [Name] still alive?" Itadori asks, sitting across from Yuta, divided by their makeshift fireplace.
Fushiguro averts his eyes with a guilty look on his face as he shakes his head.
"Oh."
Itadori Yuuji is alone.
He's lost his best friend, Nobara, his mentor (practically his father), Nanamin, Todo lost his technique because of him, and now, he's lost the one person who he truly felt like he could fall back on.
The one person who saw him at his lowest, and somehow brought him back from that.
"Oh."
He's alone.
And he genuinely doesn't know how he can cope without the help of his lover, his [Name].
272 notes · View notes
starsandhughes · 11 months
Text
Penalty Box Series— Trevor Zegras Edition (Four)
23-24 Season Masterlist
previous: three
next: five
a/n: i skipped the coyotes game bc it was... so boring... and there was zero z content in it
OCTOBER 22, 2023
yourusername
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liked by trevorzegras, jamie.drysdale, and 16,439 others
yourusername welcome back to my post game penalty box update show: sissy missed shatty edition! (alternatively titled "my fiancée took a hard hit and then looked like the greek god he is on the bench and i can't wait to take a trip to mount olympus")
after a long two periods of almosts, mason finslly scored first in the third! thst scoring momentum fid continue, though! just... for the other team...
the ducks did succumb to the bruins, but my z-baby got a penalty! so that's a plus! he slashed marchand and he didn't even get licked! (dear brad, if you're reading this, please lick my fiancé on october 26)
i'm sorry, boys, that you're on a three game lose streak, but i can feel it in my SOUL that you're going to cease that trend soon! use the power of friendship, my dear quackies!
i love you, always, trevy💜 pls do a trick soon! and you looked really cute smiling and watching shatty's video on the bench! prepare for kisses
p.s. dear mom/shatty, I HAVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH! SEEING YOUR VIDEO MONTAGE TRIBUTE ON THE SCOREBOARD HAD ME TEARING UP! I LOVE YOU! DON'T DIE! (@/shattdeuces)
tagged trevorzegras
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trevorzegras am i cute? or am i god like? what's the scale here? is there a graphic organizer? (i love you, forever, my sweet girl💜)
yourusername the graphic organizer is my internal feelings and there's never a rhyme or reason for any decision i make <3
jackhughes @/yourusername so just like how you make every other decision?
yourusername @/jackhughes i could smack you, there's rhyme and reason for that decision
trevorzegras @/jackhughes she's going to set you on fire
jackhughes @/trevorzegras she failed the first time and she will fail again
_alexturcotte @/jackhughes why would you bring up senior year? people can read that
jackhughes @_alexturcotte the people need to know she's insane!
trevorzegras @/jackhughes USED* to be insane
_alexturcotte @/jackhughes don't act all innocent!we didn't call you two the twins of terror for nothing
yourusername @/jackhughes lexi sold you OUT HA
user52 z in this game has me acting up🥵
_quinnhughes @/trevorzegras what's your record streak this season? is it 5, like me?
trevorzegras @_quinnhughes in my defense, one of my penalties was me serving a too many men
yourusername @/trevorzegras and then you hooked hakanpää
_quinnhughes @/trevorzegras you did do that
trevorzegras i came out to have a good time and i’m honestly feeling so attacked right now
yourusername @/trevorzegras mwah!
shattdeuces i love and have missed you, too, daughter! p.s. your post-game goody bag made the other guys very jealous!
yourusername i hope you didn't share anything!
shattdeuces i would never betray you like that
yourusername i appreciate your never ending loyalty <3 where are we on the whole "marchand licking z" thing?
shattdeuces i am not asking him that
yourusername ... accidentally show him my post then
trevorzegras @/shattdeuces please no
yourusername @/trevorzegras just bite him in return
_quinnhughes i’d pay to see that
trevorzegras @/shattdeuces SEND HELP
shattdeuces @/trevorzegras i laughed and he asked what i was laughing at. it's in his hands now.
yourusername @/trevorzegras he lick, you bite, i smooch
trevorzegras @/yourusername that smooch better just be for me
yourusername @/trevorzegras my smooches are only for you
user45 trevor nudging terry to look at the video board before going back to smiling like a fool at it makes me so emo🥹😭 give him shatty back!
jamie.drysdale @/trevorzegras you're not in the negatives yet! that's an accomplishment!
yourusername so true!! he's thriving!
trevorzegras i’m growing up so fast!
jamie.drysdale @/yourusername remember when he was our son? now he's the father of your future children
trevorzegras @/jamie.drysdale she's now crying under my shirt
jamie.drysdale @/trevorzegras i’m on my way
trevorzegras @/jamie.drysdale she's requesting blankets so we can build a fort
jamie.drysdale @/trevorzegras i'm on my way home to get blankets
user9 slash that rat! he deserves it!
user14 the seventh pic shows the face of a man who knows damn well his teammate started a scrum over him
jackhughes you're so obsessed with him
yourusername he's my baby daddy for a reason
trevorzegras @/jackhughes i've been obsessed since the day i saw her
jackhughes @/trevorzegras we know
yourusername and i was obsessed with my rat the day i saw trevor
trevorzegras @/yourusername we know.
colecaufield @/trevorzegras ooo a period! there are some big feelings in those two words
_alexturcotte @/trevorzegras this is taking me back to the good ol' days when you'd come into the room screaming over matthew! so cute!
trevorzegras is it attack trevor day?!
_quinnhughes @/trevorzegras it's always attack trevor day
yourusername @/trevorzegras i love you! always!
trevorzegras @/yourusername mhmm i love you, forever
user76 three game loss streak? a z penalty? roughing penalties? that's ducks hockey, baby!
masonmctavish23 did i just get a backhanded compliment?
yourusername no?
masonmctavish23 am i being gaslighted?
yourusername gaslighting? that's a big word, kiddo, did one of your little friends teach you that?
masonmctavish23 my friends are your friends and your fiancé!
yourusername well they definitely didn't teach you that
trevorzegras @/yourusername HEY
jamie.drysdale @/yourusername HEY
yourusername @/trevorzegras @/jamie.drysdale hi?
lhughes_06 @/jackhughes @_quinnhughes were we just going to let the "trip to mount olympus" comment slide?
_quinnhughes @/lhughes_06 i’ve given up
jackhughes @/lhughes_06 i threw up in the comfort of your bathroom in peace and moved on
yourusername @/lhughes_06 @/jackhughes @_quinnhughes you guys do know how i got pregnant, right?
trevorzegras @/yourusername i think i need a refresher course
lhughes_06 @/trevorzegras STOP IT
216 notes · View notes
avatar-anna · 2 years
Note
so just an idea. what if few years down the line when prof and h get married and he drops her to uni first time after they are married and people address her "professor styles" or "doctor styles" and she cant stop blushing and harry is just smirkingg. you can totally ignore this if this isn't something you like!
Heyyy queeeeeen, first of all HAPPY NEW YEAR! Second off all this is kinda a request/idea : how about y/n is mad at bf!Harry so she gives him the silent treatment and then out off nowhere he calls her y/n Styles and it gets her attention and then they have a talk about marriage and the end up making love?
I've given this a lot of thought, because on the one hand, I feel like Professor would be the type to keep her last name. BUT I also think she would appreciate the idea of shedding her past for good by taking a new name, Harry's name. She talks about it at length with Harry, and he holds his tongue, wanting her to come to her own decision and supporting whatever she wants to do (but he totally has an opinion and it's for her to be Mrs. Dr. Styles). And because you so graciously requested this, we're going with Mrs. Dr. Styles, so here is three times Professor was referred to as Dr. Styles!
The Professor Series
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Harry often thought the way Y/n went on tangents was cute, adorable even, but right now she was being a little...unreasonable.
"Y/n, we talked about this. It happened for a moment, and security took care of it. I'm fine."
"This is not okay! Do you know how many creeps there are out there? So many. I don't need statistics because I encounter them all the time, Harry. This is serious. You could've been hurt, the band could've been hurt, anyone could've—"
"Darling, nothing happened. Come back down to earth for me. Please?" he said, standing up from the hotel bed to come near her.
"I am on earth! Where some...some freak decided it was okay to run onstage and charge you! Why aren't you taking this seriously, Harry? Anything could've happened? So many celebrities are attacked by fans who think they're in a relationship or have a right to..."
And on and on she went.
Harry knew it was scary for her. Y/n got easily spooked by this kind of thing. And he was fine with that, but honestly, hearing about all of this was freaking him out. He'd been fine after the show, but now she was making him uncomfortable.
"Y/n, love, come on. Stop," he said gently, reaching for her hand. But she wouldn't stop, she just kept going.
Harry loved her, he would never want to change a single thing about her. He loved her little quirks and all the things that made up who she was. She wouldn't be his love without them. But sometimes she didn't listen to him, and sometimes she worked herself into a frenzy when she didn't need to.
"Y/n Styles! Stop. I love you, but you need to stop," he said, voice soft but stern.
He didn't even realize what he said until she asked, "What did you just call me?"
"What?"
"Y—You called me Y/n...Styles," she said, and Harry thought she'd probably never looked so confused in her life. "Why would you do that?"
"I...I don't know," he said truthfully. "It just came out. Sorry."
He wasn't sorry, though. Not really. Harry might not have meant to, but he certainly liked the sound of it. They hadn't been together very long, but he knew what he wanted, he knew what his future was going to look like. Harry didn't care how long it took or when that future started, but he could wait.
What he didn't want was to freak his girlfriend out. Harry knew Y/n loved him, but she sometimes got squirrely about the abstract, the unknown.
"No, it's—it's okay, I—I kind of liked it," she said.
Of all the things to happen tonight, that was the most surprising.
Grinning, Harry said, "You did, did you?"
"I know that look. Don't give me that look or I'll take it back," she said, stepping away from him as he got closer.
"What look?"
"That look! Put those bedroom eyes away!"
"Bedroom eyes?" Harry asked, laughing as he cornered Y/n against a wall. In a sing-song voice, he said, "You want to be my wiiife."
"N—No, that's not what I said, I just—Hey!"
"No more talking," he said, carrying her over his shoulder. "We, Y/n Styles, are going to bed."
Y/n tried to say something, but Harry's mouth was on hers before she could make a sound. "I said no more talking," he murmured, nudging his nose against hers. "We're going to bed, and we're going to kiss for a little bit."
"Maybe a little more?"
Chuckling, Harry kissed the top of her cheekbone. "Whatever Mrs. Styles wants, she gets."
"Stop it with that. We're—mm."
"Shh. No more talking."
"It's—It's Doctor Styles," Y/n corrected, wrapping her arms around Harry's neck.
"Of course. Now, where were we?"
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"Have a wonderful, wonderful day, Dr. Styles."
"It's review day. My least favorite day," Y/n huffed, slumping against the seat of the car.
"Impossible," Harry said, leaning across the middle console to kiss her temple. "Today is your first day of work as Dr. Styles, which means it is the best day."
Y/n's cheeks flushed at the sound of her name. Her new name. She loved it, of course, she wouldn't have changed her name if she didn't. But it was just so new. They'd only been...married...a few weeks. Seeing the ring on her left hand still surprised her from time to time.
"Are you going to say Dr. Styles every time you address me?" she asked him.
Harry's grin was broad as he winked and said, "Absolutely, Dr. Styles."
"Harry—"
He took her chin in his hand and kissed her long and hard. When he pulled back, her entire face was red. "Harry! Anyone could see—"
"Let them. I love my wife, and everyone should know it," he said. "I'll be by for lunch, okay?"
"Really?"
Harry kissed her forehead. "Yep. Gonna bring you flowers and embarrass you in front of all your students and make them jealous at the same time. So go, I'm looking forward to being a trophy husband."
He was being silly, he knew that, but he couldn't help it. They were married. Harry would shout it from the rooftops if he could, but he would settle for making Y/n blush every chance he got.
Grinning from ear to ear, Y/n surged forward and kissed him. "Do you have to bring the flowers?"
Chuckling, Harry pecked the bridge of her nose. "I have to bring the flowers, Dr. Styles."
Y/n, Dr. Styles, wrinkled her nose at Harry, her husband, who just wrinkled his at her and kissed her pouted lips. "You better go, Dr. Styles. You're gonna be late for class."
She nearly told Harry to drive them back home, that she didn't want to go back and teach, she just wanted to stay in all day with him. But that was impractical. She had to go.
So Y/n got out of the car and went, but not before one more kiss to Harry's lips.
All day, when students called her Dr. Styles, Y/n blushed. She got through her lectures without a hitch, but she couldn't avoid the teasing questions at the end, or the cheers and whistles when Harry came by as promised, a takeout bag in one hand and a large bouquet of her favorite flowers in the other. He ate up all the attention, then sat Y/n on his lap while they ate lunch together. And when her next class was about to start, he didn't leave like she expected. He stayed in her desk chair and minded his own business while she gave her lecture, though she could feel his gaze on her every now and again, each one more heated than the last.
Y/n could feel each one and tried not to rush through one of her lectures so they could get home. That wasn't who she was, she was a good professor who didn't let her husband's—her husband's—bedroom eyes get in the way of a lecture. She was better than that, she would be better than—
"I think that covers everything. I think you would all benefit from some free study time, so...so get studying!"
Students trickled out one by one, some of them going up to Y/n to ask her a question or congratulate her or both. She answered and accepted each graciously, but her fingers were also tapping furiously against her leg, just below the hem of her skirt. And finally, when the last student was finally gone, Y/n turned around and launched herself at Harry.
"Take me home," she mumbled against his mouth. "Take me home right now, please."
"Darling, you have one more class—"
"Now," she insisted, before going back to kissing him all over. His neck, his jaw, his cheeks, the corners of his mouth.
Harry hummed as he threaded his hand through her hair. He gripped her waist and indulged her in one more kiss before he tilted his head back. "I love you, my darling, darling wife, but no."
"No?"
"No. I know you want to now, but you'd be disappointed for letting your students down later," he said.
Y/n wanted to protest, but she knew Harry was right, so she slumped against his chest. "But I want you right now."
"Believe me, you are not alone in that department," he said, squeezing her hip. "But, we have our whole lives together, hm? So I will wait, and so will you, and when we get home..."
"Promise?"
Harry kissed his wife, loving the feel of her body pressed against his. "Promise."
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"Okay, we're live in three, two, one!"
The host of The Daily Show smiled at the appropriate camera and did his normal greetings after the commercial break, then announced that Y/n was here.
"Welcome Dr. Y/l/n"
Y/n was nervous beyond all reason, but somehow she managed a small smile. "Thank you. I—It's Dr. Styles."
She wasn't used to this. She wasn't used to the cameras and the attention and the live studio audience. Well, she was, but her lectures were different. That was her safe space. This...a live television interview was not her safe space.
"Right! Of course, congratulations!" the host said. "How is married life treating you and your husband? What's his name again?"
"HARRY!" someone in the audience shouted, which caused everyone to laugh and cheer.
Y/n blushed. How long had they been married, and she still blushed at the mention of her and Harry being married? "Good. Good, I guess. We're very happy."
"I'm glad! And I'm so curious to know how the two of you met. A Cambridge professor with multiple PhDs and a world famous pop star. How does that happen?"
The host's voice wasn't condescending, merely curious, but Y/n wasn't prepared to talk about this. She didn't come to talk about her relationship.
Her mind buzzed with an answer that wouldn't be rude but would also change the subject. "We...met during the pandemic, which was when I realized how lacking schools were in...in so much. Which sounds silly, but I skipped most elementary grades and spent most of my time in higher education. But I...I realized I could help."
"Right! You became quite the internet sensation during lockdown to make educational videos, which obviously led to this. Your very own curriculum."
Grinning, Y/n nodded.
She never set out to write a series of textbooks for children. Y/n had a busy life, a fulfilling life as a professor. And yet somehow, she found herself wanting to do more. Harry had a lot of...younger family, and she liked to help them with their homework and projects and such. But her first look at their textbooks was very disappointing.
"This is what they're teaching you? This isn't even historically accurate! Where's..."
It was safe to say once something was on Y/n's mind, she couldn't let it go. Harry was amused but supportive, his usual reaction when she took on a new project.
"How can I help, love?"
"You didn't even finish school. How are you going to help me write a textbook?"
"Ouch, love."
"Well?"
"I mean you're right, but you could always say, 'Thank you husband. I love you so much.' Now you try."
"Thank you husband! I love you so much!"
"See? Not so hard."
"I started by just writing one. A comprehensive American History textbook," she said now, tapping her fingers under the desk where no one could see. " Kids have the capacity to learn so much more than what schools are currently teaching them. Leaving things out or not acknowledging certain events or painting our nation's history in a certain light is a disservice to them."
Y/n wasn't expecting applause, didn't necessarily want it. So she was surprised when the audience cheered for her answer. She smiled despite herself, then glanced to the side where Harry was standing off camera. He gave Y/n a thumbs up and blew her a kiss.
"That's amazing," the host said. "So you started with one, and it just progressed from there?"
"Yes, I—Once my mind is set on a project, I can't let it go, so I carved out time and just...wrote a bunch of textbooks, I guess. Well, I researched and got a Master's in Urban Education first. But then...then I wrote a bunch of textbooks."
"You wrote an entire elementary and middle school curriculum by yourself! That's incredible, Dr. Styles."
The audience cheered again, and when it died down, the host asked her more questions about her books, which she was happy to answer. She talked about her approach and her willingness to not shy away from or hide unsavory history. "In a way that's appropriate for each age group, obviously," she said. "But it's important for children to understand the complexity of history and that there's never just one side to a story. I tried really hard to be respectful and honor forgotten voices that have been left out for too long."
"Would you ever teach to younger pupils, yourself?" the host asked.
"Oh heavens no," Y/n said quickly. "My students at university can barely keep up with me. No, I—I wanted to do my part by providing well-rounded, unbiased material, but I'm not sure kids would want me to teach it."
And when it was all said and done, when the cameras were off, the host shook her hand and thanked her for coming to the show.
Y/n walked off the set and toward Harry, who was quick to spin her around in his arms. "You were fantastic," Harry said.
"I know! I was nervous at first, but I just am so proud of my work, you know? So it was easy to talk about. And I even managed a few jokes!"
Harry laughed because her "jokes" flew over everyone's heads. The only reason Harry got them was because Y/n practiced them on him the night before. "They were great."
She smiled, but it dimmed the longer she looked at him. "You didn't think they're funny."
"What? I didn't say that! Why would you—"
"You didn't have to. It's all over your face," she said, pouting. "You don't think I'm funny?"
"I think you're brilliant, and I think you have so many talents. Can you let the rest of us idiots be funny?"
"I suppose that's fine," she huffed. "Can we go home now?"
Kissing her temple, Harry took her hand and led her out of the studio. "We can go wherever you want, Dr. Styles."
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I went swimming for the first time in a while. I honestly just got discouraged after seeing my weight on the scale stay basically the same. Then came the Fourth of July. I had burgers and hot dogs and a lot of chips. Just generally unhealthy options. I felt like my contributions to my health were not seeing any gains so I spent a few days eating crap and not exercising.
Today, I jumped back into things. My diet is average but I did goto the pool. I could feel the lethargy of missing a few workout days. But the swim was great, especially in this warm weather.
I want to see progress in my health. I'm at 186 right now. What I am currently doing is not working. I've been in the 180's for a while now. I take meds that cause weight gain as well as having several health issues that also cause weight gain. I am trying to be realistic but also want to see some weight loss.
My current plan of attack is 30 min swims and moderate diet. I don't feel like restricting my food or fasting. I think what I will try to do is a swim in the morning and a run in the evening because the sun it out and the weather is nice. As for diet, I need to see myself eating healthy options all day. Not necessarily less, but healthier meaning no super processed foods, avoid carbs and high sodium. Focus on my leafy greens, healthy fats, yummy fruits and basically wholesome food that makes me feel good.
I am also on team moderation, so that'll be a cup of ice cream here or a popsicle there.
Gus is getting on in his years. He now has a lot of white fur on his face. It's the only way anyone could tell he was 11 years old.
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drpoisonoaky · 8 months
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Lala
When you realize you have a new weapon to make fun of your sister, you have to use it even though for you it isn't a weapon. At least that's how Zuko thinks about it.
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Azula: I’m going to kill your friends and my brother.
Katara: Your brother is also my friend.
Azula: But it’s a different crime. And is that what you are worried about in the whole sentence?
Katara: You want to kill them a lot. Nothing new. But don’t.
Azula: Ugh.
Katara:
Azula: At least you could ask why.
Katara: Fine. Why do you want to kill them this time sweetheart?
Azula: I’m going to ignore your tone. They discovered the “Lala”.
Katara: Is another weird tradition of the Fire Nation or..?
Azula: It’s Zuko’s Zuzu.
Katara: Oh that Lala. I think it is cute. But isn’t new, right? Zuko calls you that a lot.
Azula: To them it is. And Zuko is enjoying it.
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Sokka: When you come back to the Southern Water Tribe I’m going to force you to do penguin sledding.
Azula: Why would I eve-
Zuko: Hey buddies.
Azula: Don’t call me buddy ever again.
Zuko: Ok Lala.
Sokka: We were-
Sokka: Wait what, Lala? What is a Lala?
Zuko: You know Zuzu?
Sokka: Are you asking me if I know you? Did you hit your head or something?
Zuko: Not dumbass, the nickname. Azula calls me that all of the time.
Azula: We know, Zuzu. So penguin sledding?
Sokka: Forget that. Did he just call you Lala? Can I call you Lala? Oh god the mighty Azula, princess of the Fire Nation…AND WE CAN CALL YOU LALA.
[Azula proceeds to electrocute Sokka]
Zuko: That was unnecessary.
Azula, getting ready to throw another lightning:
Zuko: LALA STOP IT
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Aang: Azula really did a great job in the meeting.
Zuko: She’s actually really good but she’s really mean.
Aang: Yeah, although I was thankful when she made all of those councilors shut up.
Azula: My pleasure Avatar. I always love to make a grown up man cry. Ask Zuzu.
Zuko: She certainly does. Especially when I’m in that group.
Aang: Anyway thanks for today. Right?
Zuko: Yes, thanks to Lala now we only have like 5 boring meetings to go.
Aang: Wait.
Zuko: There’s more?!
Azula: Oh no.
Aang, grinning: Did he just call you Lala? That’s so cute.
Azula:
Zuko: See Azula, that's so cute. You should appreciate it.
Azula: I will deal with Zuzu later but if you want to use that word again Avatar let me remind you I already killed you once.
Zuko: If you kill him now Katara would break up with you.
Azula: SHUT UP DUMB DUMB *goes away*
Zuko: That’s worse than Lala. But at least she’s angry for the next meeting.
Aang: The next meeting it’s going to be awesome.
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Suki: All of my warriors are spread inside the festival so we are protected.
Zuko: Great. All set then.
Azula: Wait, what about the harbor?
Suki: We are protecting a festival inside the city.
Azula: If I want to attack a festival I would do it through the harbor cause nobody would be there. You bring a few water benders or a Katara and break it all in like 5 minutes.
Suki: I hate to say this but you’re right. Let’s relocate some of the girls.
Zuko: Good job Lala.
Azula:
Suki:
Azula: I’m honestly more angry by the fact you just praise me like a dog than the nickname.
Suki: Yeah Zuko. We’re grown ups.
Zuko: But-
Zuko: Suki, I am giving you a chance to laugh at Azula’s expenses.
Azula: And she’s a grown woman who is doing her job. Shush.
Suki: Yeah Zuko I’m busy now. When I finish I can laugh and use the Lala.
Zuko: It doesn’t feel like a victory.
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[After sparring time with Azula]
Toph: I needed that. Being police is awful.
Azula: Well you are a gun for the government.
Toph: You are part of the government.
Azula: Not the government that has you as chief.
Toph: You and I? In the same government? We will have to stop a coup like every day.
Zuko: But unfortunately you both will stop them.
Azula: Of course we will, Zuzu.
Toph: What are you doing here, Zuzu?
Zuko: Came to see why we were hearing two people fight to death on a Wednesday afternoon.
Toph: I was beating a princess’ ass.
Zuko: And also Lala, can you look at these scrolls? I need a second opinion.
Azula: Sure let’s me clea-
Toph: LALA.
Azula: Shit.
Toph: HE CALLED YOU LALA. IT SOUNDS LIKE A FUCKING CHILD SONG.
Toph: ZUZU AND LALA I CAN’T.
[Toph is rolling while she’s laughing]
Zuko: For once, I didn’t say it to bother you.
Azula: For once, I believe you.
Zuko: I think she can’t breathe.
Azula: Whether she dies because she can’t breathe or she feels more relaxed after a good laugh, she deserves it.
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Azula: I swear to Agni.
Mai: Don’t be dramatic.
Ty lee: Why are you so angry? It never bothered you so much before, Zuko has been calling you Lala for years. It’s cute.
Azula: I mean it doesn’t bother me if Zuko calls me that. But them. Feels like I’m a joke.
Mai: Lala sounds like a joke.
Azula:
Ty lee: I think what’s bothering you so much is the exclusivity.
Azula: Explain yourself.
Ty lee: When he calls you Lala it comes from your “bond”. When any other person calls you Lala they are probably trying to laugh at your cost.
Mai: That’s deeply complicated with only having 2 lines of information.
Ty lee: I manage all the feelings in this group. I’m well trained.
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(many years ago)
Zuko: Why can’t you stop calling me that stupid name?!
Azula: Zuzu, it's cute. Nobody calls you Zuzu. I’m the only one who does it.
Zuko: Oh. That’s…okay you can call me Zuzu but
Azula: What?
Zuko, grinning: I’m calling you Lala cause nobody would call you that.
Azula: WHAT! NO! ZUZU.
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nobody-nexus · 11 months
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TADC Incorrect Quotes
(With have Ragatha/Pomni, Jax/Zooble if you squint, and maybe like ONE Jax/Bubble for shits and giggles)
Ragatha: As your best friend— Gangle: Zooble's my best friend? Ragatha, holding a knife: As your best friend—
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Ragatha: Pomni is at that very special age where an adult only has one thing on their mind Caine: Boys? Pomni: Homicide
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Pomni: You know what? When I join this friend group, I thought you guys would be dealing with my bullshit Caine, Zooble and Kinger continue screaming about mold water Pomni: Not the other way around! Bubble: I dunno, sounds like you need to drink the mold water :)
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Gangle: How do Zooble and Jax usually get out of these messes? Ragatha: They don't. They just make a bigger mess that cancels the first one out
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Ragatha: Just be careful, Pomni! Pomni, heading out the door: I'm always careful, Ragatha! Pomni: It's everything around me that's careless
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Caine: I truly believe that water can solve all your problems! Gangle: Weight loss? Drink water Ragatha: Clear skin? Drink water Jax: Want to get rid of someone? Drown them.
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Zooble: Hold on, I can explain Caine: Really? Can you now? Zooble: I can if you give me a minute to think of a convincing lie
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Caine: You have to apologize to them Jax Jax: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!
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Gangle: I came out here to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now
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Ragatha: Do you guys ever have a civilized conversation that doesn't require insulting each other every time you get a chance? Zooble: No. Jax: No. Ragatha: Didn't think so
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Pomni: Hostage or not, sometimes it’s nice being held Ragatha: Are you okay
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Zooble: When I get Doordash I order 20 Cheeseburgers at a time and heat them up throughout the week so that I don’t have to pay the delivery fee multiple times Ragatha: I hope you understand how food poisoning works Zooble: I hope food poisoning understands how I work. I never met a burger I couldn’t eat
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Ragatha: Wake me up- Pomni: Before you go go Gangle: When September ends Caine: WAKE ME UP INSIDE
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Ragatha, smugly, after security arrives to escort Jax and Pomni out: So, do you wanna walk out of here or do you wanna be carried out? Jax, in defeat: Let’s go Pomni: Wait. Jax: What? Pomni: I’d kinda like to be carried out...
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Gangle: We have fun, don’t we, Pomni? Pomni: I have never been more stressed out in my entire life
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Kinger: Hey Ragatha? Ragatha: Yeah? Kinger: What's your favorite color of the alphabet? True or false? Ragatha: Ragatha: ...What.
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Jax: How high are you? Pomni: Mm, I don’t know how to say it in feet. Zooble: No, he's asking what drugs are you on Pomni: Oh, antidepressants, why?
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Caine: It is 6:09 . Caine: I am wondering why I’m still alive. Caine: Send Wendy’s. Pomni: The whole restaurant?!
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Zooble: I’m the smartest person in this group.... Jax: Really? Then why is your hand stuck in a vending machine? Zooble: I paid for my Mars Bar, I’m getting my Mars Bar.
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Pomni: Which one of you was going to tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water?? Jax: Y- you were putting it in cold water?? Zooble: Pomni. Answer the question, Pomni. Pomni: Yeah??? I thought people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process. didn't realize there was an actual reason. Pomni: Plus, you think I have the patience to boil water? Jax: You don't have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes?? Zooble: Why are you putting it in the microwave to boil it? Jax: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove? Zooble: It takes less than a minute. Jax: Is your stovetop powered by the f#%king sun??? Zooble: How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove? Jax: Like seven minutes?? Gangle: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like 2 minutes... less than that if you use a saucepan! Zooble: Why are you putting the whole mug on the stove?? On medium heat?? Gangle? Your stove is enchanted! Pomni: Every single person here is a f#%king lunatic. Ragatha: Do none of you own a f#%king kettle?
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Gangle: Guess what I'm about to get! Jax: On my nerves.
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Zooble: Jax has discovered "deez nuts" jokes and it's all they say now. Everything is deez nuts. They simply can't stop. Zooble: I asked Jax where he learned that joke. He made me promise him wouldn't get in trouble if he told me. I agreed. Zooble: So, he leans in and whispers, "deez nuts."
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Pomni: HELP! I TOLD RAGATHA I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK! Jax, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?
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Jax: It’s impossible to make a sentence without using the letter A. Ragatha: Despite your thinking, it is quite possible, yet difficult, to form one without the specific letter. Here’s one more to further disprove your theory Pomni: F$%k you.
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Zooble: New challenge! Don't say stupid sh!t for 24 hours!
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Pomni: Coca Cola is a health potion, Pepsi is a mana potion Ragatha, amused: What’s grape soda? Pomni: It’s f#%king purple baby!!!
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Zooble: It doesn’t have a bone Jax: Then why is it called a boner?
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Pomni: Can I get a waffle? Caine and Bubble: *fighting and yelling at each other* Pomni: Can I p l e a s e get a waffle?
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Jax: I committed all 7 deadly sins in 30 minutes Zooble: Wow, I've gotta hear this Jax: I was angry and envious of my neighbor, so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and didn't share Ragatha: You forgot pride Jax: No, I'm pretty proud of this
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Ragatha, trying to be cute: WOW, Pomni, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How AWFULLY lewd of you. Pomni, confused: We literally slept together yesterday? Ragatha: Eh- sweetie no that's not-
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Caine: Can we talk about that mass email you sent? Pomni: Why? It was important Caine: All it says is, "I'm back on my sh!t". Jax, shrugging: The people need to know
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Jax: We’re getting married, bitches! Bubble: And we're about to make it everybody else's problem
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dem-obscure-imagines · 2 months
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I Know the End | Vol. 2
I Know the End
Poe Dameron x Reader
Fandom: Star Wars
Summary: You were one of the Rebellion’s greatest weapons in the Galactic Civil War, a Princess from a distant planet, a Jedi with wings. Now, you’ve found yourself in a new world, a new war, your old friends long gone.
When Poe Dameron was sent on a wild goose chase of a reconnaissance mission four systems out, he never expected to find the key to his heart…
Note: At long last, here it is. Thank you for your patience. I love you all. I honestly wrote this as a long-winded attempt to make Poe Dameron’s dumbest line “Somehow, Palpatine returned” into a gut-wrenching and emotional moment and it got way out of hand. I am no Star Wars expert, but I did a lot of research for this and consider myself waaaaaaay more of a SW nerd now than I was a mere two months ago. Could probably write a dissertation on it at this point (I say as I literally churned out a novel). It is my first time writing for the fandom, though, so, here goes nothing. I did make up a fair bit of stuff and a good handful of OCs for this. Let me know what you think!
Warnings: Canon-typical violence, lightsaber and blaster wounds, alcohol consumption, war and the implications of it, gets a little steamy but no smut, reader has nightmares, misuse of the Force, Rewriting the Rise of Skywalker a lil bit…
Word Count: 82.7k total (Split into four approximately 20k chunks)
Reader Is: 24, a Jedi, a Princess, has butterfly wings
Vol 1. | Vol 2. | Vol 3. | Vol 4.
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Charms in Trees
A few small battles came and went. It was pilot stuff, mostly. They’d go, blow up a First Order transport, and be back in time for dinner. You always offered your help, but it was never needed. Still, you’d take any excuse to go see Poe, especially in that orange jumpsuit. You weren’t sure what it was about it, but you couldn’t get enough of it.
Sometimes you thought about taking it off of him.
It was a growing problem, your little unspoken thing. You’d forgotten just how all-encompassing a crush could be, especially when it was as attainable as the one sitting in front of you right now. You shared a base, lived just down the hall from him. Maker, you could feel that he felt the same way about you, but you still couldn’t bring yourself to shatter the normalcy.
Part of you wanted him to do it, finally take that leap of faith. You were patient. You could wait.
So you did.
Supplies began to dwindle, so you put on a utility uniform and went with some of the others to get more, lifting boxes with your arms instead of your mind. You helped Aspen and some of the other mechs with repairs. You spent time with Soren, both training and not. He was fun to hang out with, a funny guy. Had your sense of humor.
He told you that Laesynda had taken him out to Mariposas a few times when he was growing up. They’d leave flowers outside your pod, light a candle for a while and tell stories. It was haunting, almost, the funerals people held for you despite the fact that you weren’t dead.
Poe had been refurbishing an old X-Wing in his free time, which wasn’t very much to begin with. Leia had been upping his responsibilities, clearly bracing for something. Whether it was an attack or a defensive move, you couldn’t tell, but it had him stressed out.
On a beautiful afternoon, you looked for him in the hangar, armed with some baked goods. BB-8 chirped to welcome you and Poe kicked a shelf in shock, a toolbox teetering for a moment before it started its descent straight on top of him. You caught it in mid-air. The tools floated out of the box, your arm outstretched, heart racing. You set them all down gently, safely away from that pretty face of his.
“Didn’t mean to scare you, Dameron. Came here with a peace offering.”
“Peace offering?” He asked, rolling himself out from under the X-Wing. He peeled his work gloves off, dusting himself off as best as he could.
It looked pretty close to finished, you noted, looking it over. It would need a paint job, of course, but all of the major parts seemed to be accounted for.
“Finn said you’ve been in a mood lately…” You admitted. “Figured I’d bring you something to take your mind off it.”
He grinned, looking at the gift and then up at you. There it was, that infamous flyboy grin of his. “Sunshine, you’re all I need to take my mind off of it. But these are appreciated, too.”
Your heart fluttered at the nickname, handing him the container of sweets. “How’s it going in here? It looks good.”
“Thanks. Should be done soon.” He reported, busting into the box and biting into the sweet, berry-filled tart. “And then we’ll really be in business.”
“I’m sorry about your other one, by the way. I feel partially responsible for that.”
“It wasn’t my first. I knew it wouldn’t be my last.” He chuckled. “At least it got to go out with a bang.”
“And some flames, as well. It was on fire, last I saw it.”
“I am glad I got to take you for a spin in it, though. Think I could get you into this new one sometime?”
“I’m always down for a joyride.” You told him, eyes sparkling, words sincere. “Let me know when it’s done and I can try to fit you into my busy Jedi princess schedule.”
“You’re serious.”
“Always.” You nodded. “I’ve been wanting to spend more time with you.”
He pouted, gazing at you through those dark lashes, a little bit of fruit filling stuck to the corner of his stupidly pink lips. His tongue poked out to get it, but failed. “Wish I’d known that a week ago, I would have carved out more time.”
“Don’t worry about it, Commander.” You said, resting a hand against his chest. You reached up with the other hand, gently wiping corner of his lips. “I know you’re busy, too.”
He held your hand against his cheek, meeting your eyes. “Not too busy for you, your Highness.”
“Good.” You replied, thumb gently stroking his stubble.
He turned his face, pressing a soft kiss to the pad of your thumb. He met your eyes, gaze all innocent despite the way your cheeks were flushing. “Did you get it?”
“I did.” You nodded, making a speedy recovery. “Couldn’t let the best pilot in the Resistance walk around with jam on his face, could I?”
“Well, thank you, for the treats, for sparing my reputation, all of it.” His eyes scanned down your face as you finally removed your hand from the side of his. “You got anything going on today, (Y/N)?”
“Training.”
“Mmm. What time?”
“Soon.” You said, glancing at the watch around your wrist. It had been Luke’s, Leia had given it to you. “About fifteen minutes.”
“Could you move that panel for me real quick?” He asked, pointing up at the wing of his X-Wing, where a patch of machinery was exposed, a heavy piece of sheet metal leaning up against it.
“Oh yeah. Absolutely.”
He set his box of tarts on the workbench and rolled a ladder over to the X-Wing while you lifted the wing cover into place, arms out in front of you, the heavy piece floating in mid-air. He stopped and watched for a second, chuckling to himself.
“What?”
“Still getting used to it, is all.” He confessed, gently pushing the piece into place, where you held it until he started bolting it into place. “This thing weighs like two hundred pounds, and you just…You’re amazing. You know that?”
“You think that’s cool, you should see what I can do with some pretty hefty rocks.”
He glanced over his shoulder at you, the whir of his wrench stopping. “Oh I’m sure it’s phenomenal.”
“Anything else you need while I’m here?”
He shook his head. “I’m all set. Good luck with training. I hope you…you know, move things good.”
“I’ll certainly try.” You chuckled, turning and leaving the hangar.
Over and over in your head, you watched him turn his face and press the gentlest kiss to your thumb. You may have been the one with wings, but he was always the one that gave you butterflies.
***
Your final bits of training that day just so happened to be wing-centric. That morning, you’d flitted from tree to tree, hanging metal charms in the branches with lengths of twine. Rey had been given some other independent activities to work on, but it was clear you and Soren had some ground to cover, or…not cover, flight being the main objective here.
The two of you stared up at them. He looked at you for instructions, but you simply repeated what you’d already said.
“Go get them.”
“What, with the Force?”
“Nope. We’ve been using the Force for hours. Time to stretch those wings, little prince.”
He laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever been up that high before.”
“That’s why I need you to be comfortable with it. If you go about it the right way, you can get some serious height. More, if you strengthen your wings with practice and exercise, and more yet if you use the Force for a little boost.”
“Could you…show me?”
You chuckled, hands on your hips, looking up, up, up at the charms. Yeah, that would definitely be a bit daunting if it was your first time flying. “Sure. I’m not gonna cut them down, though, because I’ll have to go up there and hang them all again.”
You spread your wings, shaking the accumulated dust and humidity collected on them from Ajan Kloss’ temperate ecosystem. And then you took off, running at a stump on the ground and using it as a springboard, wings carrying you to the first branch, where you hit the hanging charm sending it swinging.
You flipped from the first branch to the next, a few feet higher, touching that charm before heading to the next, and the next. You were like a dancer, graceful, fluid, gliding from branch to branch, using your limited flight to climb until you were near the top of the highest tree in your training grounds. You took a moment to look out at the camp, admire the Resistance crew bustling from building to building, doing their daily tasks to keep your movement up and running.
And then, doing one last somersault, you dove down, catching yourself with your wings and a burst of air, kicking up the leaves scattered on the forest floor.
Soren stared with wide eyes, Rey having joined him on the ground.
“And you expect me to do…that?”
“Not all of it.” You assured him. “That last jump is definitely something you’ll have to build towards. It’s a leap of faith. But that’s why I’m here, to catch you if the landing isn’t going so smooth.”
“Alright.” He nodded. “I can try.”
“Do or do not. There is no try.” You said, the words familiar, even if they weren’t yours. Sometimes the Force spoke through you; you could feel that this was one of those times. “Aim for five charms today. Any more than that and I’ll be impressed.”
Soren looked up at the first charm, on a low, sturdy branch, deceptively close to the ground. Like you did, he took off at a run, using his wings to get some height and land–somewhat shakily–on the branch, but he did it, youthful face breaking into a grin.
“There you go!” You encouraged, Rey smiling as she watched.
“It’s really great, what you’re doing with him.” Rey said, voice sincere. She reached for your hand and you gave it to her, just as you had that very first day you met. Long ago, you and Leia had shared a sisterhood, and now you shared that with Rey.
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
“I hope so. He’s…well, he’s my first Padawan. After you, of course, but you had a head start.”
“I wish you had been here when all of this started,” she confessed, squeezing your hand. “It would have been…nice to know I wasn’t alone in this.”
“You’re not alone.” You told her. “A long time ago…I was meditating, trying to find other Jedi out there. Luke and I thought we were alone, too. I found someone, another Jedi, a young woman. The Force works in mysterious ways, of course, because…it was you. You wouldn’t be born for another, what, eleven years? But I know it was you. We were meant to be here. I was meant to help you and…I plan on doing that. No matter what.”
Rey smiled, words failing her. She pulled you into her arms instead, resting her head against yours. You hugged her back, rubbing comforting circles in her shoulders.
“You know, I’ve always wanted a sister.” She admitted with a laugh, tears in her eyes.
“Well now you’ve got one.”
“I got seven charms, Aunt (Y/N).” Soren said, dangling them from their strings when you turned to look.
“How was the landing?”
“A little shaky, but…” He shrugged and then looked back up at the next charm, even higher than the last. “I think I could get another one.”
“Go ahead. Round two.” You encouraged, motioning him up into the tree.
Finn and Poe walked over not long after, chatting animatedly about something, BB-8 rolling alongside them. It was clear, even from that distance, that Finn was teasing him.
You couldn’t help but smile at the sight.
“She getting you up there next, Rey?” Finn asked, pointing up at the trees, where Soren had very clearly already gotten the hang of it, throwing a few flips and flourishes into his movements. You grinned, proud.
“Oh, no, I don’t think so.” Rey shook her head. “I will after you do.”
“Fair enough.” Finn chuckled. “How’s it going, ladies?”
“Good. Really good. Good, productive day today.” You said.
“Good view up there?” Poe asked, shielding his eyes as he glanced up at the highest branch, a glittering charm still hanging from a thread.
“Great view.” You said.
“I thought you said you could only cover short distances, that looks like quite a height.”
“You have to build up to it.” You told him, pointing to all the shorter branches on the way up to that point. “I can’t just fly straight up there. Maybe with some strength training, but these things aren’t what they used to be.” You gave them a flutter, noting the way his eyes caught on them yet again.
“Well, it looked great, from what I could see.”
“That’s high praise coming from you, flyboy.”
“Well, from one flyer to another…you’re a natural. Literally. You were born to be up there, doing that.”
You smiled, voice soft and sincere when you said, “So were you.”
“That means a lot, (Y/N).” He said, head turning downwards for a moment while he thought. “Anyway, uh, Finn and I were wondering if the two of you would join us at the cantina later? Rose’ll be there, too. Things have been so tense lately, we thought we could all blow off some steam.”
“I’d love to.”
Rey nodded. “Yeah, me too.”
“Just let me get changed into something more casual.” You said, flourishing the skirts of your Jedi robes.
“What, the robes aren’t fit for a night on the town?”
“The robes aren’t fit for…much other than looking solemn and kicking ass.” You said with a chuckle. “Unlike your flight suit, which is fit for any occasion.”
“Back to that, huh?” Poe grinned, letting out a laugh. “If you really like that thing so much, maybe I’ll wear it more often.”
You smirked. “I wouldn’t complain.”
“I would.” Finn chuckled. “It needs a good wash, buddy.”
“Alright, alright.”
You watched as Soren landed once again, wings powerful, stance strong. You gave him a nod, pride blossoming in your chest. He was getting there after all. Your training was working. You just hoped that, when danger came, he’d be ready for it.
You hoped you all would be.
Cards on the Table
You sat in your quarters with Rose and Rey, getting ready for your night out with the boys. You braided a few strands of your hair, tying them off with small gold rings at the end.
“This one?” Rey asked, holding the dress up against her frame, a sage green color. It was one of the ones you’d given her.
You nodded. “That color suits you. Brings out your eyes.”
Rey considered your words for a moment before beginning to change. Rose sat at your desk, looking through the accessories you’d pulled out. You plucked a pair of earrings from the collection, setting them in her palm.
“Are you sure? I’ve never worn a princess’ earrings before.” Rose said, staring at them. They were a pair of gold, dangling leaves. They’d go with the blouse she was wearing, a natural pattern on them.
“First time for everything.” You said with a shrug, turning your attention to your own outfit. A wine-colored top with a corset front, the back swooping just low enough for your wings. With it, you’d paired some dark brown pants with flared legs, a decorative gold belt made of metal hoops. You tucked your lightsaber into your bag, instead of displaying it at your hip.
“Oh this…” Rey struggled with the back of her dress. “I can’t get it to stay closed.”
“Here, let me.” You walked over and pulled ribbons from the sides of the dress, tying it closed above the large divot for where your wings went when you had worn it. “I sewed these in for Leia. She and I shared a closet during the Rebellion, more or less.”
Rey’s eyes scanned down her reflection, hands smoothing out the green fabric. “Thank you.”
“You look great.” You told her, words warm and reassuring. “You both do.”
“So do you!” Rose complimented.
A few minutes later, you decided you were ready, not that there was any pressure to be. This was just Finn and Poe you were talking about after all. But you had a feeling quite a few other members of the Resistance crew would be there.
The three of you arrived and it felt like time stopped. Poe and Finn were in a round booth in the corner and they both looked up, faces lit with anticipation at the sight of you. It felt good to be wearing something other than your robes or your standard Resistance gear, a luxury you did not take lightly.
They stood up and crossed the room, meeting you somewhere in the middle. Poe was wearing that leather jacket of his, the one you’d mistaken him for Han Solo in. Beneath it, a button-up that seemed to be missing a few buttons. You swore he was doing it on purpose.
“Hey, Princess.” He grinned. “Glad you made it.”
“Wouldn’t miss it.”
Several Resistance folks milled about, dancing, playing games. A few droids manned the bar, where there were paper lanterns strung from the support beams, casting the room in warm, ambient light.
The five of you shimmied back into the booth, Poe going almost out of his way to make sure he got the seat next to yours, right on the end. His arm settled on the seat behind you, that strong sandalwood scent drifting from his pulse point. Maker, you could get lost in it.
When the droid taking drink orders came around, you each requested something, settling in for a nice, casual night.
A song you recognized came over the speakers in the corners of the room and you smiled. It was familiar. A place like this, people like these.
The more things changed…
“I requested some oldies for you.” Poe confessed, just about causing your heart to melt. “Thought it’d remind you of the good old days.”
“He put ten whole credits in the jukebox.” Finn tattled, earning a pointed look from the pilot. “Stood there forever picking out songs.”
“Well that was very sweet.” You said, leaning a little closer to him subconsciously. “Not to sound incredibly old, but the new music is still…growing on me, we’ll say.”
“How old were you?” Finn asked. “I’m sorry if that’s rude. I don’t think we’ve ever asked.”
“I’m twenty-four. I’ll be twenty-five in…well, I don’t know when my birthday falls now. Four months? Three months? Something like that. Give or take thirty years, of course.”
“You’re younger than me.” Poe murmured, almost in shock of the fact.
He’d taken it for granted, he guessed, just how young you were when they’d put you in that pod. But you’d existed his entire life, etched into legends and stories told by anyone who remembered the war. To him, you’d existed forever. But he was older than you, by eight years.
“Were you…alive when I was?” You asked, running the numbers in your mind.
“I’m thirty-two.” He said, meeting your eyes. There was an odd look in them, like he was asking permission for something. He chuckled, covering the flash of insecurity with a smirk and a quip. “I know I hardly look it.”
“You would have been really young, then.” You bit your lip, letting out a little laugh at the new information. The whole situation was ridiculous. You doubted your paths had ever crossed, so it didn’t matter, ultimately, but still. “That is a little weird.”
“It is.” Poe agreed, eyes still ever-searching yours for some sign that it was still okay, the feelings floating around his heart.
“That means you really are the Han of the group.” You said, in an attempt to diffuse the tension that had blossomed in his chest. It worked. You could feel it instantly. “He was like thirty and the rest of us were in our twenties.”
“Does that make you Leia this time?” Rey asked, catching your eyes, a spark of mischief in her gaze. She knew exactly what she was implying.
“I think it does. Which means you get to be me this time. Congratulations, you are now a princess. Use the title well.” You joked, sitting back against the cushioned bench, also, coincidentally, against Poe’s arm, which was still there, perched on the leather. Warmth emanated from him, both literally and figuratively.
Eventually, the drinks came and you took a few sips of yours, loosening up. You all chatted and joked and laughed. Eventually, Rey and Rose got up to dance with the mechs over on the dance floor. Finn followed behind them.
Jessika spotted you and motioned you over, a broad grin on her face. Beside her was Aspen. Snap was there, too. They were hanging out near the holodart board mounted to the wall.
“Wanna play some darts?” Poe smirked, following your eyeline.
“If you’re ready to get your ass kicked, sure.” You teased, getting out of the booth after him and walking over to where his friends were waiting.
“You look great, girl!” Jessika said. “Give us a spin.”
You did a little twirl, showing off the top, the pants, the accessories. Your wings fluttered behind you like a cape, folded down and out of the way, as they always were.
“Dameron said he was gonna try to get you out here tonight.” Snap said, jostling his buddy’s shoulder. “Glad you joined us.”
“Do you guys do this often?”
“Not often enough.” Aspen said with a laugh, perched criss-cross on a barstool. “But our schedules have us all wound up tighter than a drum. I think we all needed to let off some steam.”
“How have things been for you guys? Missions running smoothly?”
“As ever.” Jessika said. “Thanks, of course, to our fearless commander.”
“Stop, stop, you’re too kind.” Poe said, playfully brushing off his shoulder. “It helps that I have the best team in the galaxy at my disposal.”
Snap motioned you closer, handing you a glowing dart. “Alright, enough chitchat. I want the Jedi on my team.”
“That is not fair.” Poe protested immediately. “It’s only fair if she’s on my team.”
“Sorry, Poe, I’ve been spoken for.” You shrugged, throwing the dart and landing in the outer ring of the bullseye.
Snap’s face lit up and he high-fived you.
“That’s gotta be cheating.” Jessika said, looking to Aspen, who was serving, apparently, as the referee. Pilots took their holodarts very seriously, after all. “Ref, tell her she’s cheating.”
“No, if I was cheating, it would look like this.” You took a second dart from Snap, covered your eyes with one hand, and threw the dart, using the Force to pull it through an exaggerated loop-de-loop on its way to the board, where it hit dead on in the center. You lowered your hand and shrugged innocently. “I just genuinely have pretty decent aim, as hard as it is to believe.”
“She’s pretty and she’s got a sense of humor. You’re a goner, Dameron.” Snap said, elbowing him while you were distracted, laughing with Aspen and Jessika.
Poe chuckled, crossing his arms, eyes teeming with tenderness. “Believe me, pal, I know.”
***
The night went on. You had a few more drinks, toeing the line between tipsy and drunk, but not quite getting all the way there. You and Poe continued to dance around each other, but he didn’t make a move. Well, any further than he already had. But after watching him interact with some of his friends, you’d come to realize that he was a touchy guy. It was definitely his love language.
You sang some songs at the karaoke machine in the corner of the room, sharing the stage with Rose, who had a really good voice, as it turned out.
At the end of the evening, when the crowd began to dwindle, Poe walked you back to your quarters. You, somewhat clumsily, punched in your code, the doors sliding open smoothly. You lingered in the doorway, turning to look at him.
“Thanks for taking me out, Dameron.” You said, breaking the warm silence that threatened to swallow your moment. “I had a great time.”
“Thanks for coming. I, uh…” He reached for your hand and you gave it to him, letting him fiddle with your fingers. It was comforting, his touch. You doubted you’d ever tire of the feeling of those calloused palms against yours. “If you were serious about that joyride…I’m taking it up tomorrow. Little test-drive, checking perimeters. Two porgs, one stone, you know. It’ll still be a tight fit, if that’s alright.”
“Well we both know I have no problem with getting close to you, Dameron.” You teased, giving his hand a squeeze. “What time are you picking me up?”
“After breakfast? Or…well, whenever works. I know you’re busy.”
You nodded, eyes glimmering. “After breakfast works.”
You could feel it again, that warmth sweltering in Poe’s chest. That desire laced deep in his eyes. He was thinking about kissing you. The fantasy playing out in your mind, you weren’t sure if it was yours or his, at this point.
Him, grabbing you by the hip, burying a hand in your hair, kissing you fiercely, passionately, lips exploring every inch of your own. Hungrily. Like he’d been waiting for it. You heard the way his breath hitched, felt his large, warm hand wander further up your back, towards the base of your wings as he kissed you. Cards on the table, heart on his sleeve.
But he didn’t. Didn’t move, aside from giving your hand another squeeze.
You smiled at him, still reeling from the images that had just flashed through your mind, but doing your best to hide the way your heart was racing. “It’s a date.”
These Haunted Wounds
You woke with a start not long after you drifted off. An hour or two at most. Nightmares. Figured.
This time, it was about a different saber. A red one, two little offshoots on the side of the hilt. It looked dangerous. Poorly constructed, if you were honest. One wrong move and the wielder would slice their own hand off by mistake.
No, the scary part was the guy wielding it. Long, foreboding figure, black cloak that drifted in the wind. He wore a mask over his face, voice deepened by a modulator of some kind. It brought back memories in all the wrong ways.
Despite the fact that you hadn’t seen him yet, didn’t know what he looked like, you could just tell. This was Kylo Ren. Had to be. That type of energy could only come from someone who was trying his damndest to stand in the shadow of Darth Vader, an entity you were still all too familiar with.
Luke had made his peace with the guy. You had never gotten that opportunity.
Kylo swished his cape and from his shadow came Insidia, still haunting you after all these years. She plunged her saber into your heart, the pain scorching and real, a scream tearing itself from your throat, and that was when you woke in a cold sweat.
You sat there, hands shaking, heart racing, collecting yourself before trying to lay down to sleep again. Just as you were about to lay back down, there was a knock on your door. Eyebrows furrowing, you swung your legs out of the bed, crossing the room and opening the door with a click of a button on the wall panel.
Poe was standing there in his sweatpants, panting, armed with a piece of a pipe. It was clear he’d run there. “What happened? Are you alright?”
“Huh?” You asked, rubbing at your bleary eyes. You stopped, staring at his bare, toned chest for maybe too long before meeting his gaze. “I’m fine.”
He lowered the pipe. “Oh. I heard screaming.”
Had you screamed out loud? Maybe you had. Maybe you’d projected it on accident, through the Force.
“It was just a nightmare.” You reassured him. You chuckled when you looked at the pipe hanging from his grip. “Nice.”
“Hey, I could do some real damage with this thing.” He defended, giving it a test swing to demonstrate.
“Oh I bet.” You gave a tired smile, let out a sigh, that spot in your chest burning, where Insidia had stabbed you in this dream.
She’s dead. You reminded yourself. She can’t hurt me anymore because she’s dead.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Same old.” You shrugged. “Stabbed with a lightsaber this time. Right through the chest.”
He frowned, nodding. “Is there anything I can do?”
“I’ll be okay.” You promised him. “But thank you for rushing to my rescue. Very daring of you, Commander.”
“Any time.” 
You could feel that he wanted to stay. But you could tell he wasn’t going to ask. Ever the gentleman in the presence of a princess. It was kind of refreshing. You smiled at him. “Get some sleep, flyboy. See you in the morning.”
“You too. Goodnight.” He smiled. He held up the pipe in his hand. “I better go put this back.”
You laughed, watching as he walked back down the hallway. He glanced back at you, meeting your eyes before returning to the room he shared with Finn.
A soft smile pulled at your lips and you lingered in the hallway for a moment before closing your door and walking back to your bunk. You sat there, wondering what it would have been like if you asked him to stay. It wasn’t that you didn’t want him to, but…maybe there was a reason he was waiting.
Maybe he was waiting until after the war to get attached. That would be smart. You knew so many during the Rebellion who did just that. 
Some hashed everything out in the heat of the war, sure. It was hard to get comfortable. It was hard to know which base would be your last, which fight would end it all. Some people chased comfort, wanting to get close to each other while they had the chance.
But others wanted to wait, to make sure they were going to make it to see the peace after the war, and whatever relationship, whatever life awaited them after.
You rolled onto your side, staring at the wall. You wonder if he knew the way he had his hand wrapped around your heart, a little X-Wing orbiting it around and around.
Tomorrow, you promised yourself. Tomorrow you’d say something, up in the X-Wing with him. Arms around you, chest pressed against your back, legs tangled in the cockpit. And one way or the other, you’d finally have your answer.
This time, when you fell asleep, the only thing you dreamt of were his lips.
The Crash
The next morning, Poe met you and the others for breakfast, already dressed in his orange jumpsuit, the collar flipped open. You could not keep the smile off your face at the sight.
“I can’t believe this is really what does it for you.” He laughed, drunk off the look in your eyes.
“It suits you.” You said, eyes lingering on the collar, fighting the urge to reach out and fix it. You rummaged around your mind for some quip to fire back, but came up empty. He’d stolen the words right from your mouth.
The group of you finished eating and Poe cleared your plate, leading you towards the hangar. 
“I don’t have it painted yet, but the mechs checked over it yesterday and gave me the okay.” Poe explained.
“So we’re not going to crash, is what you’re saying.”
“Not with a Jedi on board.” He said, eyes meeting yours. “I still think about that transport you caught. I didn’t know you could just…do that.”
“Took a while to get to that point. Ships are heavy. It helps if I’m not fighting the trajectory. Laesynda’s ship was on its way down, I just…cushioned the fall.” You explained.
“You’re real humble for a Jedi, you know.”
“You think so?”
“More humble than I would be if I could lift spacecrafts with my mind.”
“Oh I’m aware, flyboy. If you were out here with a lightsaber, none of us would ever hear the end of it.” You teased, looking over his flightsuit, still enamored. “You’re already an ace pilot, you can’t possibly have all the skills.”
He opened his mouth to retort, but was cut off by the harsh blare of a distress signal. The two of you looked at each other before booking it to the strategy table, where Leia was, hand still over the button.
“It’s one of our settlements. First Order troops on the ground, TIE fighters.” She made eye contact with you, Rey running into the room right after. “Kylo is with them.”
She dispatched groups of fighters, sent you and Rey and sent out the Black Squadron. Poe marched through the hangar, yelling orders, getting his team ready for battle. You forced your eyes away from him as he loaded BB-8 into his X-Wing, strapped your saber to your belt, and loaded onto a transport with Rey and Finn.
Soren walked over, saber at the ready. You stopped him with a shake of your head, something akin to a maternal look in your eye. “I need you here. It’s just Kylo. Rey and I can handle him.”
“I’m ready.”
“I know you are.” You said, hands on his shoulders. “That’s why I need you here. Someone’s gotta protect the base.”
He nodded, understanding. He took a few steps back, standing with the others as they saw you all off.
You made eye contact with Poe, one last lingering glance before he climbed into the cockpit and took off into the sky, blasting off at lightspeed with the rest of his squadron to clear way for your transport.
The ramp of the transport closed and Finn looked at you. “He’s like you. Soren.”
“Reckless?” You asked.
He shook his head, eyes serious and warm. “Brave.”
You smiled at the thought and put a hand on Finn’s arm. “So are you.”
The ride was short, but shaky. You didn’t like turbulence, especially in a craft that only had thin, tiny windows. It left you uneasy. But eventually, you touched down, saber in hand, leading the charge with Rey.
There were dozens of Stormtroopers, opening fire on not only the scattered Resistance members, but any civilians they could get their hands on. You put yourself between them, deflecting their shots with a few swings of the saber. The fighters that had come with you ran out of the ship, assessing the situation and adjusting as quickly as possible.
In the air, a battle had broken out as well, X-Wings and TIE fighters firing at each other, as well as the ground below them. You tried to identify which ship was Poe’s. You could feel him up there, but it was hard to get a lock. All you knew was that it was a black ship, an orange stripe painted down the side. Black Squadron.
Another trooper shot at you you and you shifted into battle mode. You used the Force to mow over a row of troopers, pushing them onto their backs in the dirt and leaving them scrambling to get back to their feet. One came at you with a melee weapon, electrified, but you did away with it quickly, using the Force to throw him at a tank, the force of it taking out the canon with a loud explosion.
More troopers focused their aim on you and quickly met the same fate.
Overhead, an X-Wing twirled around, almost drifting through the air and taking out one, two, three TIE fighters in quick succession, firing at a cluster of troopers on the ground immediately after. That had to be Poe.
Another turret fired near the civilians and you ran towards it, using your wings to get some height and jumping up the length of it, burying your saber in the metal paneling on the side and riding it back down to the ground as it was destroyed in a cloud of fire and smoke.
Finn ushered civilians to safety, taking out any troopers that got close with a well-placed blast. Rey worked with you to take out the remaining turrets, keeping the troopers at bay as more of them unloaded from landing transports.
You heard a boom overhead and looked, hoping to see a TIE fighter on its way down, but instead catching sight of an X-Wing, black and orange, one of its engines engulfed in flames.
You reached up and caught it with the Force, directing it away from the thick trees it was aimed towards and turning the nose, bringing it down gently in a clearing of grass and dirt, away from the immediate violence on the sprawling battlefield. You didn’t have time to worry if it might be Poe climbing out of it. Didn’t even have time to think before you saw him.
Kylo Ren.
His saber glowed red, contrasting against the lush green of the planet you were standing on, his kyber crystal obviously damaged, the way its blade was flared. He’d forced it too hard, been too rough with it. Maybe that was why the offshoots were there, to redirect the excess energy.
He was dressed like a shadow, long and sleek, all in black, face covered up by that helmet. It was better that way. You were afraid of finding too much of your friends in his broken gaze. Leia. Han. In another life, you may have been something like an aunt to him. Now he stood in front of you, a monster. 
And he was headed right towards you, strides long and elegant.
“Mothim said you were awake, your Highness. It’s time to see if you really are the thing of legends.” He twirled his saber, voice distorted beyond anything human. An intimidation tactic, no doubt, in addition to the obvious imitation of one Darth Vader.
“Ah yes, my best friend’s biggest disappointment. I keep hearing about you, and I have to admit. You’re a lot taller than I expected.”
He raised his hand attempting to use the Force to…you weren’t sure. Grab you, choke you, but you had your shields up, always did, blocking out his attempt. “You’re good.”
“I have to be.” You replied, readying your saber, stretching out your neck.
He swung at you and you deflected, angling carefully to avoid the reach of the flares near the hilt of his saber. So that’s what they were for. One wrong move and it would be your hand he was slicing off. You countered, using your wings to spin into position, leveraging an attack that he dodged, his saber clashing loudly with your own.
“Tell me, did you really face Vader by yourself, or did you have Skywalker to help you?” He locked his saber with your own, mask uncomfortably close to your face. “Skywalker is dead now. I saw to that myself. I finished the work that Vader could not.”
You let out a cold laugh at that. “You’re not Vader. You’re not even close.”
That definitely pissed him off. He let out a strangled yell, running at you with full force. You dodged with a leap, spinning out of the way. He took the opportunity to take a swing at your wings, which flared in reply, flattening themselves out of his reach. Your foot swept through the dirt as you landed, breaking your somewhat clumsy fall.
That had been a targeted attack. Straight for the wings. Not your arm. Not your saber. Your wings.
Rey came over next, putting herself between the two of you, battling him with a rage you knew had to be personal. You could feel that they were connected. Always had been. There were layers here that you did not quite understand yet. But she still fought him, moves quick and deliberate and instinctual.
You jumped back in alongside her, red clashing against blue and pink, sparks flying. Some of the brush caught fire, but never fully ignited, instead filling the ground between you with smoke, partially obstructing the rest of the fight.
You landed a hit on his leg, slashing into the skin. Rey got him on the opposite arm and he let out a burst of Force energy that sent you both flying. You used your wings to recover, repositioning mid-air, an outstretched hand slowing Rey’s trajectory as well, just before the back of her head hit a tree.
“RETREAT!” Kylo screeched, his voice echoing through the trees, birds scattering at the loud, distorted cry.
You’d hurt him. Bad. You could see the blood pooling in the dirt as he stalked away.
The Stormtroopers and other forces retreated into the transports that hadn’t already been blown up. The remaining TIE fighters, few though there were, hopped to lightspeed. One of the X-Wings shot a few transports on their way into the atmosphere, but other than that, the fight was over.
You found Finn among the crowd, making sure he was uninjured. He was fine. There had been some injuries, but no casualties, even among the civilians, who were cheering and embracing, celebrating their safety for the moment.
You looked over at the crashed X-Wing, smoking at the edge of the field and ran over to it, wings carrying you farther and faster than you’d flown in years, just a handful of feet above the grass. You landed on one of the wings and used the Force to pop open the cockpit, the windshield cracked, the pilot still inside.
She tugged off her helmet, long brown hair cascading down her shoulders. Jessika. Not Poe.
You offered her a hand, helping her out. She looked up at you, awe in her eyes, her hand wrapping around yours. You used your wings to lower the both of you gently to the ground.
“Are you alright?”
“I swore I was going to crash. You…you saved my life.” She rushed into your arms and you held her, rocking her comfortingly. “How do I even begin to repay you for that?”
“You don’t. We’re all in this together.” You assured her, wiping some of the soot from her face with a gentle hand. “Now let’s get you back to base. I’m sure there’s lots of room for you on the transport.”
One of the Resistance members from the planet rushed over, putting out her smoking X-Wing engine with a fire extinguisher. “We’ll take care of this. Get it repaired as soon as possible.”
Jessika exchanged some words with the mech, arranging something of a plan to come get it before following you and the others back onto the transport.
“Are you alright?” You asked Rey, checking all your bases, counting faces and heads.
“I’m fine. Are you?”
“I’m good. He…I don’t know what he knows about Mariposans, but he was locked in on my wings.” You said, shivering at the thought. “Someone must have told him to aim there.”
“You think the First Order has a Mariposan?”
“Maybe.” You said. “He…he mentioned someone named Mothim. That’s…vaguely Mariposan-sounding.”
You watched the sky, the X-Wings rounding up. Jessika had her helmet tucked under her arm, which started talking, Poe’s voice coming through the headset. You could have cried with relief that he was alright.
“Pava, come in. Are you alive out there? We don’t have eyes on your X-Wing.”
“I’m alive, Black Leader. Boarding one of the transports on the ground. They hit me in the right wing, but one of the Jedi caught me on the way down.”
He chuckled and you could hear the smile in his voice when he said, “That is great news. We’ll see you back at base.”
You watched as the X-Wings took off, hitting lightspeed in rapid succession. Your own transport followed suit not long after, once everyone was accounted for and all the systems had been checked for damage. You breathed, focusing on the quiet until finally, the ship landed and the ramp lowered.
You walked out, surveying the crowd of celebrating rebels when you spotted BB-8 whirring at you at full speed, beeping a mile a minute. He looked you up and down and then sped away, straight to Poe, who looked down at him. His little head swivelled to you and back.
“(Y/N)!”
Poe sprinted over, pulling you into his arms the second he was close enough. He let out a long breath, his gloved hand cradling the back of your head as he held you. You wrapped your arms around him, resting your head against his shoulder, wings twitching before relaxing completely.
“You…you’re alright? I saw him go after you. I wanted to shoot, but I couldn’t get a clean shot.” He said, regret in his voice, guilt on his brow.
“I’m okay, Poe. Really.” You told him, pulling away for a moment to get a glimpse at his face, check him over for injuries. There was sweat dotted on his forehead, wetting the curls at the edge of his hairline. “I thought it was your ship coming down. I was so scared.”
He shook his head, taking a moment to peel off his gloves so he could touch your cheek with his hand, skin impossibly warm. He rested his forehead against yours, the movement familiar and comfortable. “You saved one of my pilots. I…just when I think you can’t possibly impress me more…”
You wanted to kiss him so badly. So, so badly. Just surge forward and collect his lips as he uttered his sweet, flattering words. You could tell he wanted it, too. That victory kiss.
“Poe…” You murmured, mouth impossibly close.
“I’m right here, baby.” He whispered in response, voice gentle, eyes soft. Sparkling with anticipation. “We’re okay.”
Your breath hitched at the petname, heart racing faster than his X-Wing. You repeated his words. “We’re okay.”
He nodded, closing his eyes for a moment. He took a long breath and then hooked an arm around your waist again, pulling you close as he pressed a long kiss to your cheek. He buried his face in your shoulder, inhaling what was left of your perfume, diluted, you were sure, by the smoke from the battle.
Mood lightening considerably once he’d processed that you were actually okay, that you’d won, that you and Rey had fought off Kylo Ren, he chuckled to himself, remembering your original  plans for the day.
“Sorry about our date, but…she’s probably gonna need some repairs before I take her up again.” He looked back at his X-Wing, untangling himself from you, but keeping an arm anchored around your waist, just beneath the base of your wings. It tickled, where his orange sleeve touched the soft tissue, but you didn’t dare move him.
BB-8 beeped up at him, agitated.
“I was careful, Bee, why do you think we’re standing here?”
He beeped something complimentary of your performance out in the battle.
“Couldn’t have said it better myself.” He grinned, proud. “Really, you were awesome out there.”
“So were you, flyboy. I lost count of how many TIE fighters you took down. Are you sure you’re not Force sensitive?”
He smiled that prettyboy smile, reaching over to wipe some soot from your face, thumb moving deliberately, focused on one spot. “Pretty sure. I’ve just had a lot of practice.”
You saw Soren, ready to approach you, but giving you a minute with your pilot. You nodded at him, a promise that you’d be over there soon.
“I better check on my team. Make sure everyone’s in one piece.” Poe said, looking back towards the hangar where the pilots and mechs were conversing, figure out what all needed to be fixed after the skirmish. “Will, uh…would you grab dinner with me later? You know, since our date got rained out and all…”
You nodded, smiled at him. You put a hand on his cheek and guided him closer, pressing a kiss just beneath his scar. “Dinner sounds great. But when that ship is fixed, I better be first in line for that joyride you promised me.”
He laughed, nodding. “Absolutely, your Highness.”
You went your separate ways, his hand lingering on yours until the last possible second until you were finally pulled apart. And yet, as you met with the other members of the Resistance, talking over the battle, taking stock of everything, he was the only thing you could think of, the feeling of his lips still lingering against your cheek.
Vintage Diplomacy
After the battle, you spent the coming days doing strength training for your wings. Your flight across the ground had opened your eyes. If you could cover ground like that regularly, it could be lifesaving.
You’d spend mornings up in the clearing on the hill. Artoo found you up there once and asked what you were doing as you hovered, wings fluttering impossibly fast. You started with five second bursts, then ten, then twenty.
Artoo timed you, let you know when to stop. And that was how Poe found you one morning before a strategy meeting with the General, as well as her Admirals and Commanders. You’d been hovering for nearly a full minute, kicking up a small breeze in your wake.
You touched down when you saw him approaching, wings folding down with record speed as Artoo gave you the breakdown. Your longest yet. With more training, who knew? Maybe you could be the first Mariposan to rediscover the power of true flight. You could certainly hope.
You stretched out your back, hands on your hips stretching both ways. You hoped the soreness meant you were building muscle, if that was how that worked.
“Hey, Princess. Thought I might find you up here. You eat breakfast yet?”
“Yeah, I had something before I came out here.” You replied.
“Good. Meeting starts soon.”
“Thought so.” You glanced at your watch. “Shall we?”
“Lead the way.” He motioned. He was wearing a leather jacket you hadn’t seen on him yet. It was brown, a rebel patch on the shoulder. Definitely vintage.
“Cool jacket.”
“You like it?” He asked with a smirk.
“Yeah. Is it vintage?”
“It is, actually. Good eye.” He rested his hands on his belt buckle. “Not as vintage as you, of course, your Highness.”
“Hey!” You elbowed him and he elbowed you back, both of you laughing as you strode into the meeting together.
A few eyes caught you, knowing looks exchanged between the other assembled people. You said some hellos, exchanged the necessary pleasantries. You greeted your sister, who smiled warmly when she saw you and Poe walk in together.
You were sure after your little, uh, victory celebration out in the middle of the base, that everyone there must have thought you were dating behind closed doors.
You wished they were right.
Poe sat with the pilots, but you could feel his eyes on you as you mingled with the folks filing into the seats around you. Rey, as always, took the seat next to yours. On your other side, Soren. There was always a certain energy to the room when the Jedi were all together. People paid attention.
Before long, General Organa started the meeting. The main topic of interest: Resistance allies, or the lack thereof.
Since the battle at Crait, Leia had been trying to get in contact with anyone she could think of, friends new and old, anyone the Resistance had helped, but responses were few and far between. The First Order had done their best to silence or…eliminate anyone who wasn’t loyal to them.
“What we’re running low on is hope.” Leia said. “The people don’t think we stand a chance against the First Order. They’d rather hide in fear than stand up and fight. And if we don’t find some allies soon…it’s a matter of time before they take us out. We’re already running on scraps here.”
Chewbacca roared out his support.
“More outreach.” Another Admiral suggested. “The people saw what we did for them in the Endor system, that we stand up for them when it matters. Hell, we got twenty new recruits from that battle alone. When people see the difference we make, they want to fight with us.”
“I think our next move needs to be diplomacy, General. It’s been a while since we’ve had representatives at any events raising awareness.” Your sister reasoned. “How are they supposed to know we’re still here if they never see us?”
“But who would go?” Leia asked, scanning the room. “Diplomatic training hasn’t been very high on our regimen, I’m afraid.”
“I can go.” You volunteered. The eyes in the room fell on you quickly, like they’d been expecting you to say it. “The First Order already knows I’m alive, our allies should, too. They think we have one Jedi, we have three. I think that would spark quite a bit of hope, General. Besides, I have the diplomatic training and I never get to use it.”
She smiled, eyes sparkling. “I was hoping you’d say that. I did catch wind of a gala. It’s…mostly safe. Former Rebel sympathizers, a formal event. It would be as good a place as ever to make a debut. You’ll need a pilot of course, to–”
“I’ll go, General.” Poe volunteered before anyone else even had the chance. “I’ll escort the princess. It would be my honor.”
Leia gave a small, professional smile that you could tell she was all she could do to keep from laughing at the sheer speed with which he offered himself up for the mission. She thought about making him fight for it, and she knew he would. Poe Dameron was nothing if not stubborn, ambitious. It was why she respected him so much.
And at the same time, she knew exactly what would happen if she sent the two of you there, together. Alone.
Maybe it was about time.
“Great. Get packed. It’s tonight, three systems out. Take the Falcon.”
***
After the meeting, you went straight to your quarters, shuffling through your closet for anything…formal. You had a lot of Jedi robes, that was for sure, which might have suited an event like this in the olden days, before even your time, but now…all it would ensure was that you would stick out more than you already did.
“Thought I’d find you here.” Laesynda said, standing in the doorway. “I might have something that’ll work.”
You followed her to her quarters. She opened her wardrobe and pushed aside some clothes, reaching for something specific. She pulled it out with a flourish. A long, midnight blue gown. Off the shoulder. It glittered like stars and truly did look fit for a princess to wear. With it, she had a silver circlet, some silver Mariposan cuff bracelets.
“Mom’s…” You remembered, a hand drifting down the sparkling fabric.
Laesynda nodded. “I’ve been saving it for a special occasion. Maybe I knew you’d need it someday.”
“Thank you.”
“Of course. Now, let’s get you dressed. Sounds like you have a flight to catch.”
Laesynda helped you into the gown, adjusting the flowing fabric so it sat just so, helping to slip your wings through the slot sewn in specifically for them. It was nice, wearing Mariposan garb again, something you didn’t have to adjust in order to wear comfortably.
She put your hair in a simple style, braiding the front pieces back, setting the circlet on your head. You put on the cuffs, put on a silver belt and strapped your saber to it, the final piece of the puzzle. The metal tones clashed, but maybe that was okay. It would stand out, at the very least.
“How do I look?”
“Like a princess.” She replied, a hand reaching out to touch your face. “And like Mom.”
You couldn’t help but tear up a little bit when she said it. She carefully tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear, giving a final nod. You were ready.
You stopped back into your room, packed a bag with some essentials. Among your things, you found your wooden box of Rebel memorabilia. Pins, cuff links, a pair of dangling silver earrings. You tucked it into the bag as well, along with another change of clothes for after the party. As gorgeous as the gown was, you doubted you’d want to be in it all night. You knew how these kinds of parties went. They were long and socially exhausting. You’d be longing for those Resistance standard sweatpants at the end of it.
There was a knock on the doorframe, your door still open. You expected it to be Laesyndra, having forgotten something. Instead, it was Poe, holding a garment bag that you assumed contained his formal wear.
“Tried to get the General let me take my flight suit out for ya, but she wasn’t having it. You ready for–” He stared, voice dropping off once he spotted you, dressed in a dazzling, midnight gown. “Oh. Wow…”
“Ready for…?” You raised an eyebrow, walking closer with slow strides.
“For takeoff?” He asked, Adam’s apple bobbing, eyes half-lidded. “Chewie warmed up the Falcon for us.”
You smiled warmly, nodding. “All packed, Commander. Ready when you are.”
“Perfect. Right. Well, let’s…” He offered his arm and you took it, slipping your arm through his, your bag slung over the other shoulder.
You gave his bicep a playful squeeze, laughter bubbling out of your painted lips. “Loth-cat got your tongue, Dameron? It’s just me.”
He let out a chuckle, meeting your eyes. “That’s the problem, your Highness.”
This Changes Everything
Your friends saw you off, complimenting you endlessly. Rey and Rose demanded you twirl around, showing off the look, which you gladly did.
“You look dazzling, Princess.” Threepio complimented, giving a little bow, arms poised at their odd angles.
“Thank you, Threepio. It was my mother’s.” You said, a sad, proud glimmer in your eye. Poe caught it immediately.
Artoo came with, but otherwise, it was just you and Poe in that big ship. He put in the coordinates, lifted off the planet, and put it into hyperdrive, with you in the passenger seat. Once it was on autopilot, you were free to move around the cabin.
Poe took his garment bag from one of the other seats and moved towards one of the Falcon’s tiny bed cabins to change. In the meantime, you found a mirror and put in a pair of earrings from your box of Rebel trinkets. They were the Rebellion’s symbol, silver and dangling from tiny chains. They completed the look.
Poe emerged a few minutes later, wearing a dark blue formal tunic, dramatic diagonal trim highlighting his shoulders. It was paired with matching navy pants, some black loafers with silver buckles.
“There was a hat, too, but I thought it would be too much.” He said, standing stiff while you looked him over, eyes roving his figure.
“Covering hair like that would be a crime, I think.” You told him, earning a chuckle and that dashing smile.
Your eyes lingered on the ends of his sleeves and you dug around in your box until you found a pair of cufflinks. You walked over to him, grabbing his hand and inserting one of the cufflinks into the end of his sleeve.
“Where’d you get this stuff?” He asked, watching your careful movements as you switched sleeves, putting the other one in as well.
“I’ve had it. Held onto it after the war. Figured we’d wear them to…charity events or something.” You shrugged. You rummaged around the box for a lapel pin, focused as you pinned it to one side of his tunic, straightening it with a quick movement. “Never thought we’d need them for war fundraising, but here we are…”
“My parents were Rebels, you know.” He confessed, voice soft, eyes softer. He’d been holding onto it, unsure why he’d never found the opportunity to tell you until now. Maybe he was afraid the information would shift your already teetering dynamic.
“Hence the jacket.” You noted, meeting his gaze, fingers still lingering on the pin. The wheels turned in your head and your jaw dropped, finally seeing it in his face. Those brows. That nose. Those eyes. “You’re…you’re Kes Dameron’s kid.”
He chuckled and nodded, eyes sparkling. “Yeah. I am. You knew him?”
“I did know him.” You laughed to yourself shaking your head. “Maker, I can’t believe I didn’t put those pieces together. He worked with Han and the pathfinders. I worked with Leia. It was kind of inevitable that our paths crossed. He was a great guy.”
“Is a great guy.” He said. “He still lives on Yavin. That’s where I grew up.”
You hummed, nodding. “That’s really good news, Poe. I’d…I’d love to see him sometime.”
“I’m sure he’d love to see you when all of this is over.” He said, eyes softening when he spoke of home, of family. “Mom was a pilot. Maybe you knew her. Her name was Shara.”
You gasped softly. “You’re…you’re Shara’s son? Shara Bey?”
Poe nodded, smiling. “I am.”
“Poe…I…” You teared up, studying him, dividing his features in your head, which had come from Shara, from Kes. You touched his face, laughed sadly, happy memories bubbling to the surface. “Shara was…so special. She was my bunkmate on Hoth. She and I kept watch together twice a week. We ate lunch together almost every day. We shared wine bottles at parties. I…I always thought there was something going on between her and Kes, but they kept it very professional. Didn’t know they were engaged until after the war.”
Poe got a little misty, nostalgia swirled in his warm brown eyes.
“We don’t have to talk about it, I’m sorry…”
He shook his head, taking your hand and kissing the back of it. “You were there. I always forget you were there. I can’t believe you knew them…”
“Maker, I could tell you so many stories…”
“I want you to. I want to hear all about them when we get home.”
“Okay.” You nodded, shedding a single tear that he was quick to wipe away, pulling you into a hug instead.
He pressed a long kiss to the crown of your head, arms tight around your shoulders, yours wrapped around his middle. You listened to his heart, hammering away beneath his tunic. You felt his lips on your forehead again, lingering for longer this time before he rested his head against yours, swaying slightly with you in his hold.
Eventually, Artoo rolled into the room, beeping to let you know you were getting close.
“Thank you, Artoo.”
He complimented Poe’s pin with a series of beeps and Poe grinned and thanked him.
“Here, I’ve probably got a magnet in here you can wear.” You said, rummaging through your box until you found one. You knelt down and he rolled forward, letting you stick it to one of his panels.
He beeped and whirred in approval, asking how he looked.
“You look very sharp.” You assured him. “You fit right in, now.”
Poe wandered into the cockpit, standing between the back row of seats, watching as the stars flew by at lightspeed. You stepped in after him and he wrapped an arm around your shoulders without a second thought.
He was your pilot, you were his princess. That was all that mattered. You rested your head against him, watching the stars.
***
The gala was being held at a nice hotel, chandeliers glimmering above, painted portraits hanging on the wall and abstract sculptures sitting on pedestals. It reminded you of home, in a way, if Mariposas had been colorless and stiff. There was soft music playing, a band tucked into the corner of the room. Poe took your arm, escorting you through the room of senators and leaders, former Rebellion members.
It was clear that this gala was pretending to be something it was not. On the outside, it had been bolstered as an academy class reunion, probably to drive off any First Order loyalists, keep them off the trail, inside was a completely different story.
You knew these people. A lot of them, wrinkled and graying though they were. Pathfinders, pilots, ground fighters, comm techs…these had been your brothers and sisters on base, and a decent amount of them, seemingly, had bloomed into important people in their own right.
What was holding them back from helping, you wondered, scanning the room. Maybe it was just the fear of the First Order, of making themselves vulnerable just to be eliminated without a second thought. But as the eyes in the room found you, the whispers picked up, speculating how it was you were there, standing there, living and breathing after all this time.
“How’s that for a first impression…” Poe murmured, just loud enough for you to hear, watching the way these legends reacted to seeing you.
“Time to finally use these stares and whispers to our advantage.” You said, leading him over to a corner where some former fighters were standing. You picked one from the crowd, calling his name to your mind. After all, it had only been two years since you’d seen him.
“Y-your Highness?” He asked, looking you up and down. He glanced at the others, as if to make sure you weren’t some Force Ghost standing there in front of him, that they were seeing it too. “I thought you were…”
“Dead? Lots of folks seem to think so.” You replied, offering your hand, which he shook vigorously. “It’s good to see you, Lieutenant. How’s Marsha?”
That was how it started. You navigated through the room, a walking myth.
Once you made your rounds, Poe at your side, chatting with the people gathered there, you felt a tap on your arm and turned to find him. Lando Calrissian in the flesh.
“I was wondering if I might steal a dance, Princess. If you’re not too busy with the Commander here.” Lando motioned to Poe, whose mouth fell open at his sudden appearance.
“Lando!” You all but jumped into his arms, captured quickly in a tight hug. He swayed back and forth, laughing.
“Maker, Leia was right. You really haven’t aged a day.” He said, taking a moment to look at you. He spun you around. “Can’t say the same for the rest of us.”
“You look great Lando. I was wondering when I’d finally get to see you. How have you been?”
“Oh, same old. Leia tipped me off about this…reunion. Thought I could help finally win these stuffy old guys over.”
“No such luck, I’m guessing.” Poe said, scanning the room.
“Not yet.” Lando winked at you. “That’s why she sent her secret weapon.”
“Not so secret anymore.” You said, trying to ignore all the eyes in your peripheral vision.
Lando introduced and reintroduced you to a handful of old colleagues. One of them, a senator now, stiffened at the sight of you, looking you up and down.
“Leia…dressed you up just like her. It would be convincing, if not for the fake wings.” He said with a sneer. “Almost had me there for a second.”
You chuckled softly, malice creeping into your eyes. “Fake wings?” You repeated, raising them slightly.
“I’ve seen them in action, Senator. I assure you, these things are the real deal.” Poe said, expression guarded, tone painfully casual.
Artoo beeped something at him, agitated, but the senator batted a hand. “I don’t speak droid.”
“I can’t translate what he said anyway, it’s hardly appropriate for an event like this.” You said with a laugh. “Do you need another drink?”
“That’s not–” He started to argue, but you held out a hand, using the Force to pull a champagne flute from across the room. It glided smoothly through the air and hovered in front of him. He stared at it, dropping the empty glass in his own hand. He looked up at you in horror as Poe laughed. “You’re her.”
“Obviously.” You replied, plucking the drink from the air and handing it to him. “I know it’s hard to believe. It’s a long story, but I was saved by one very daring pilot, a Jedi, and a fighter after a long time asleep. Imagine my surprise at waking up to another war.”
He shook his head, brows furrowed. “What war?”
“The First Order. The Resistance. Are you unaware of the conflicts, or just too callous to care this time, elevated position and all?” You asked.
“The need for fighting is over.” He said, shaking his head. “I had my war, I’m sure we can all just live in peace.”
“Senator, I don’t know if you’ve been out there, but it’s bad.” Poe said, eyes serious. “What they did to the New Republic…”
“Was a horrible incident, I’m sure, but that doesn’t mean we can all just…hop in an X-Wing and blow things up.”
You laughed at that. “You didn’t even do that the first time. You failed your flight test, if I remember correctly, Senator. Was it two times, or three?”
He scoffed, clearly offended. “Well, I–”
Poe’s eyes lit up, watching as you warmed up to take your shot.
“Don’t you remember what things were like? Under the Empire? Maybe it’s been too long for you. I know thirty years is a long time to hold onto memories, but…it’s only been two years for me. Two years since the Battle of Endor. Two years of quiet after. I remember how bad it was and this is worse. The weapons they have, the forces, the numbers. They have a Sith trying to outshine Darth Vader and Maker knows what else hidden on those Star Destroyers. They are taking children and ruining lives. One of our best friends is a former trooper. I wish he was here to tell you himself the horrors he’s seen aboard those vessels. They can destroy planets with a few button presses. Maybe you feel safe right now. Maybe you’re playing into their pocket, who knows, but someday, they’ll turn on you, too, and there will be no one left to protect you because you didn’t help the Resistance fight back.”
The room fell silent, every ear tuning into your fiery words. Lando let out a proud little laugh.
Someone across the room stepped forward, meeting your eyes. Wedge. Wedge Antilles. One of the best Rebel pilots there was. He’d been great friends with Luke, so you’d known him pretty well. It was good to see he was still around.
“Well, your Highness, where do we sign up?”
***
After a few more hours of networking, of Poe handing out tokens for further communication, taking pledges and handing out contact information for any people they knew who’d like to enlist in the Rebellion, the three of you–you, Poe and Artoo, that is–said your goodbyes and headed back to the ship.
As soon as the ramp was closed, Poe’s face broke into a victorious smile and he took you in his arms, lifting you off the ground and spinning you around. Laughter bubbled from your lips.
“That was insane!” A triumphant laugh escaped him. “You flipped that whole room in less than a minute! I…I…” He set you down, unable to wipe the smile from his face. “I can’t believe that just happened. This changes…everything. We’re gonna have so many new recruits. We’re gonna be able to get so many supplies…”
“New pilots?” You asked.
“New X-Wings. New ships. New blasters. Kriff, new uniforms, even.” He smiled, grabbing onto your arms, just above the flowing, off-the-shoulder sleeves. “Wow, I dunno, I had my doubts when Leia sent me four systems out for a shiny rock, but…I don’t know what we’d do without you here.” He met your eyes, took a step closer, dipped his head down. “I don’t know what I’d do without you here…”
You couldn’t do it anymore. You couldn’t dance around him and pretend your heart wasn’t on fire just looking at him.
You wrapped your arms around his neck and tugged him closer, lips capturing his easily, as you had in your fantasies so many times. He gasped into your mouth, arms winding around your waist and pulling you against him, lips passionate and experienced. Poe held you there with one arm, the other traveling up into your hair.
Your nose brushed against his as he twisted, getting an even better angle, teeth nipping at your lip. You reached up and cupped his cheek, thumb brushing through the stubble accumulated there.
He pulled back, forehead against yours, breaths ragged as his eyes searched your face, looking for some evidence that that had happened, that it was real this time.
“Say something,” you whispered, hand still anchored against his cheek, eyes sparkling with insecurity. “Please.”
“Give me a second. I’ve never kissed a princess before.” He murmured, kissing your forehead, then your cheeks, pressing another long one to your lips. Soft, but filled with so much passion. He let out a breathy chuckle, meeting your eyes. “Maker, you have no idea how many times I’ve dreamed of doing that.”
You bit your lip, a guilty little smile twisting your mouth. “Actually, about that…”
Poe’s eyes widened, jaw dropping before the shock melted into an embarrassed grin. “You…you could feel it, huh? The whole time?”
“More or less.” You confessed. You pulled him back into you and he didn’t resist, nose brushing yours as you whispered, “I couldn’t tell if they were your fantasies or mine, to be honest.”
He stepped forward, cupping your cheek as he captured your lips again, hungrier this time, lit up by your words, by your confession, that you had felt this way about him for just as long as he’d been drawn to you.
Another step forward and your exposed back touched the cold metal of a wall panel, one of Poe’s hands taking yours, fingers interlacing as he held it up against the wall. His other hand tugged your waist closer, closer, closer, like he was trying to fuse the two of you into one person.
You crooned, hooking your arm around his neck, keeping him there.
“Tell me to stop,” he rasped, lips trailing down your neck before crushing against yours again. “Use one of your Jedi Mind Tricks or something.”
“I can’t.” You laughed against him. “They wouldn’t work on you anyway and…I don’t want you to stop.”
“Well good, because I don’t think I can…” He said with a chuckle, nose smushed against yours. He kissed you again, movements tender and slow, smiling against you when he heard your breath hitch. “I thought Jedi weren’t allowed to fall in love. I would have done this so much sooner…”
You laughed. “That’s what was stopping you? I thought you weren’t afraid of bending the rules, Commander.”
Poe let out a breath, smirking. “Well yeah, but…you’re a princess. I thought you might not be so keen on rulebreaking.”
“Well the good news is, there aren’t any rules against Jedi falling in love anymore.” You murmured, resting your forehead against his, hands tugging on the trim of his tunic. “But if there were…I would break them for you, Poe Dameron.”
He grinned that flyboy grin, going in for one last kiss, then another, then one final, lingering kiss, stealing the breath from your lungs, the butterflies in your stomach flying loop-de-loops that rivaled any maneuver he could pull off with his X-Wing.
Soon, you knew you’d have to fly back to base, update Leia on the progress you’d made, return to your schedules and duties.
But now, you shared your breaths with him, heart racing as he cupped your cheeks, whispering sweet words against your lips, promises to steal away more time together as soon as the Maker would allow.
A Little Rebel Spirit
Poe slept in your bed that night.
Your mattress was hardly big enough for one of you let alone both of you, but he didn’t mind, changing out of his formal tunic, carefully returning your Rebellion trinkets to their special little box, and laying in your bed, watching you, hands folded on his toned tan chest, the chain around his neck glimmering against his skin.
You’d changed into some sleep shorts and a tanktop you’d modified for your wings. When you turned to face him again in the dim bedroom, he gasped, eyes falling on your thigh. More specifically, the large tattoo piece stretched across your skin.
“You have a tattoo?” He asked, almost scandalized. “Princess, I knew you were a Rebel, but I didn’t know you were so rebellious.”
“You wanna know what’s rebellious…Leia did this.” You said, fingers skimming over the artwork.
His jaw dropped. “No fucking way.”
“Yes way.” You nodded, walking over to the bed and sat beside him, propping your leg atop his so he could see better.
He ran a large hand over the tattoo, the sheer warmth of his touch sending shivers down your spine. “When?”
“Three years ago.” You answered, before correcting “Thirty-three years ago. We were on some planet, there was a market and she got a tattoo gun for like…twelve credits, which should have been the first red flag.”
“And you let her do that?” He asked, laughing.
“Well yeah. She’s my best friend. I knew it would drive my parents nuts, their second in line for the throne defiling her skin, but…I didn’t really expect to survive the war, to be honest. Besides, I was the spare, what were they gonna do about it? I knew I was never going to be queen.” You said with a shrug. “It’s not half bad anyways. She’s a talented artist.”
“This is…that tree, isn’t it. The one on Mariposas.” He said, studying the lines, the shading. It was a large, sprawling tree, branches thick, covered in flowers. Roots twisted down your thigh, headed towards your knee, and in the roots, were a few stray butterflies. Above it, three moons, their shaded crescents in various stages of their cycles.
You nodded. “The Monarch Tree. From which, all life on Mariposas bloomed, or so the legends go.” You guided his hand further down the art, to where the roots curled into a subtle version of the symbol of the Rebellion. “This was by special request.”
His features glowed with recognition and he met your eyes, reaching up to smooth the hair out of your face. “Wow, that’s…that’s really hot, I’ll be honest.”
You giggled, shifting your body towards him. “Yeah? A little Rebel spirit is what does it for you?”
“You’re one to talk. You’re into that silly orange jumpsuit of mine.” He teased, hand hooking your knee and tugging your leg to the other side of his hips, so you were straddling him, hovering inches from his face.
Your wings twitched behind you as you cupped his face with both hands, nose pressed to his. Tenderly, slowly, you inched in, grinning when he got impatient and chased your lips, hands wandering up to your waist to tug you closer.
“You know, honestly Poe, it’s not so much the jumpsuit as it is the thought of…taking it off of you. How easy it would be to just…reach out and unzip it a little.” Mischief glimmered in your eyes. “With the Force.”
He let out a broken groan at that, throwing his head back towards the wall. “You can’t just say that when I’m not wearing it.”
You smiled, coy. “Next time, perhaps.”
“Oh, there’s no question about that, sweetheart.” He had fire in his eyes when he pulled you towards him, crushing his lips to yours, tongue teasing at the seam between your mouths. You let him in, the taste of him rolling across your tongue, minty fresh from his toothpaste.
You threaded your fingers through his curls, letting out a whine when his lips left yours and started trailing down your neck, stubble rough against the sensitive skin. His hand ghosted up your back, finding the base of your wings, calloused fingertips brushing against the spot between them.
Tingles shot through your limbs like firecrackers and you crumbled against him.
He froze, the panic setting in. “Woahhh, sorry, sorry, is that not an okay spot?”
You took a deep breath, reaching up to cup his cheek, turning his face towards you as best you could from your spot tucked into his shoulder. You laughed sheepishly, cheeks flushed. “S’fine, Poe. I’m okay.”
“No, if it’s not fine, you need to tell me. Baby, I’ve never…touched a Mariposan before, I don’t know what I’m doing.” He confessed.
“It’s…that spot is the most sensitive spot on my whole body.” You said through laughs, pulling his face down to meet yours. “So we just went zero to a thousand all at once.”
“Oh.” He laughed. “So it’s a no-go zone.”
“It’s a ‘we have to work up to that’ zone.” You amended, pressing a kiss to his lips, adjusting yourself so you were a little more upright. “You can touch it, but…it has to be featherlight. Unless we’ve gotten there.”
“Okay.” He nodded, nose brushing against yours. “So, do they…have feeling in them?” He asked, hand hovering just above the crest of one of your wings, still a little afraid to outright touch them, despite the fact that he already had, that night in the kitchens.
“Mmhmm.” You spread one out for him, an invitation. “You can touch them. Just be gentle. Like before.”
Poe reached out, running the palm of his hand down the length of one wing, tingles running down your back as he did.
You let out a contented sigh, lulling against his chest as your muscles relaxed.
“Does it feel good?”
“Yeah.” You kissed his cheek, then the corner of his lips, hand resting against his chest. “It’s like…having your hair played with.”
He smiled at that, continuing the gentle movements while you were curled up in his arms. He kissed you again, lips impossibly soft, like silk, the fine royal satins your sheets on Mariposas had been made of.
“You’re the only one allowed to touch them, though.” You told him.
“Just me?” He asked, absolutely enamored.
“Just you.” You punctuated it with a kiss that he readily reciprocated. “It’s…seen as a romantic thing, on Mariposas. Wing-touching is…very personal.”
“So when you let me touch them that night…”
“I was making a move, more or less. I knew you wouldn’t take it that way, though. It doesn’t mean much to outsiders.”
“It meant everything to me, Princess.” He whispered, kissing your forehead. He basked in the proximity, of the feeling of you in his arms, the way you slotted perfectly against him, like you were made for him. “Should have done my research. Would have saved us both some time.”
You laughed. “I doubt Laesynda would have told you that.”
“True.” He went quiet for a while, thinking over something before asking, “Do you…miss it?”
“Miss what?”
“Just…the way things were, before you went to sleep.” He asked. 
You could tell it had been weighing on him. If you missed people from before. If you missed the relationships you’d had. If you missed Luke.
“Sometimes. I miss Mariposas a lot. I miss my family. I didn’t even get the privilege of losing them, really, I just woke up and…they were gone. Had been gone for decades. I miss Han. I miss Luke…but…He left me there. He just…left me there to sleep for thirty years, so…” You let out a breath. “I try not to miss him more than he missed me.”
He nodded, listening quietly, hand still gently passing over your wing, the sensation soothing in indescribable ways. It had been so long since someone had touched you like that. If he kept at it, he would lull you right to sleep.
“But I like this life, too. I like training with Rey and Soren. I like making a difference again, fighting for something important. And someday, when the war is over, I’ll get to figure out what that peace looks like for me again.” You reached up, thumb gently grazing the skin beneath that tiny scar on his cheekbone. You pulled him to you, locking in a slow, sensual kiss. “I like you most of all, Poe Dameron.”
He smirked. “You’re just saying that.”
“I’m not.” You shook your head, eyes earnest. “You saved my life. You found that pendant. You woke me up. And every day since then, you’ve been finding little pieces of my heart I thought I’d lost decades ago.”
His lips captured yours again, breathing into it. They wandered, down your cheek, past your jaw, down to your neck again. You laced your fingers through his curls, relishing in the burn of his stubble against your skin.
“Maker, I’m so glad we found you…”
He whispered against the sensitive spot he’d found on your neck, the words echoing off the caverns of your mind. That voice. Those words.
It was him. Obviously it was, but the realization still struck you to your core. You’d dreamed of this, dreamed of him for years, and now he was finally yours.
Your pilot. Your Poe.
Can’t Change the Past, Starlight
You and Poe walked down to breakfast separately the next morning. He slipped out of your room carefully, watching for any techs that might be walking by, and hurrying from your room to his to change into some real clothes, as all he had in your room was the formal tunic Leia had loaned him. 
You timed your exit about fifteen minutes after, and ran into Rey and Finn in the hallway.
“How did it go?” Finn asked. “I was kind of worried. I never heard Poe come into the room last night.”
“Oh it was great. I’m sure we’ll hash it all out in the meeting later. Lots of new pledges, hopefully lots of new recruits, too. Ran into Lando Calrissian. He’s…an old friend.”
Rey’s jaw dropped. “The Lando Calrissian. Is he joining the Resistance?”
“He’s thinking about it.” You said with a smirk. “He’s always been hard to pin down, but I have a good feeling he’ll come around. Maker knows we could use his help.”
The canteen was bustling with folks, starting their day. Poe was sitting at the usual table with Rose. You grabbed some breakfast and slid into the seat across from him. A calculated move. He slid you a cup of caf, just the way you liked it.
“There you are. I was worried you’d gotten lost on the way to our room.” Finn said, searching Poe’s face. “Where’d you end up last night?”
“I…slept on the couch down in the lounge. Didn’t wanna wake you, we got back really late.” Poe lied.
Alright, you were officially doing this. You were officially hiding your relationship. It was kind of thrilling, you had to admit.
“Mmm.” Finn nodded, not buying it in the slightest. “Well, how’d it go?”
“Fantastic. (Y/N) has a real way with words.” Poe said, eyes sparkling. “Flipped the whole room, had everyone all fired up. We got so many new pledges and allies. It’s gonna take the droids forever to get all the files sorted.”
“Like I said, diplomatic training I never use.” You said with a shrug, taking a sip of caf.
“How’d you sleep?” Poe asked, meeting your eyes.
“Slept alright. Like you said, we got back late, so I didn’t get much of it.”
“Mmm. Sorry to hear that.” He said through a grin that he hid behind his mug. “I slept great.”
You kicked his leg under the table.
After breakfast, the group of you filed into the meeting, where you were somewhat surprised to see Lando, chatting with Leia. Once she spotted you, she motioned you over, hugging you tightly.
“I never doubted you, (Y/N), but I have to admit, I didn’t expect results like these. This changes everything.”
“I’m glad I could do my part, General.” You said, eyes glimmering. You turned to Lando. “Didn’t expect you to head here so fast.”
“How could I not? You need help. I should have been here a long time ago.” He said, slinging an arm around your shoulders. Just like old times. “I’m here for whatever you need, ladies. Just say the word.”
“Well right now, I need someone wrangling the new recruits. They need to be rounded up from outposts in the Outer Rim.” Leia said.
Lando saluted. “Just give me coordinates and a ship. I can make it happen.”
You left the two of them, turning to sit in your usual seat with the other Jedi. This meeting was a little more broad, more of the operatives from the middle ranks present in addition to the higher-ups.
Laesynda walked past, letting her hand brush on yours as she passed, a knowing smile on her face.
You avoided Poe’s gaze purposefully, but you could feel it on you from across the table. Business as usual, you supposed. He was always giving you those lovesick looks, but now there was something more in those warm brown eyes of his. You loved the feeling.
Leia started the meeting, opening with words of congratulations, the numbers from the previous night broken down in the projection on the holo in the middle of the room. The team burst into applause, several congratulative whoops and hollers sounding. Snap jostled Poe’s shoulder and he finally met your eyes, giving you that charming flyboy wink, handsome features illuminated in the teal light.
Leia moved to the next order of business, the intel Lando had been hard at work gathering. About Mariposas.
“The attack on Mariposas…I believe it was an inside job.” Lando said.
Your heart dropped into your stomach, ears ringing. You looked at Laesynda and she shared the same grim expression you were sure was on your face. You felt Poe’s eyes on you, watching as the rug was torn from beneath your feet.
“I don’t mean to impede on our celebration, I just…With three prominent Mariposans among our ranks, I think it’s a logical conclusion that…two of them were the targets of the original attack. So whoever tipped off the Empire splinter cells, if they’re still alive, could be interested in…”
“Finishing the job.” You said, suddenly exhausted.
“Yeah.” Lando nodded.
He brought up some diagnostics, a map of the planet, a breakdown of the attack. He talked those who were unfamiliar with it through what had happened. You watched as red bloomed across the Healer’s Temple, right where you were, blaster fire taking out the Refuge, where the Healers had retreated. A light attack up front to scare them, a heavy attack on their hiding spot to finish them off.
Immediately, you knew Lando was right. It was an inside job. Only someone who knew the innerworkings of the palace would have known the Healers retreated there in the case of an emergency. Someone who had grown up there, perhaps.
You bristled, watching as the attack continued, further details selling his point further. This was an attack that had been planned and executed by someone intimately familiar with your home. And someone who wanted you dead. Or at the very least, didn’t want you to wake up.
“Maddox.” The name left your mouth coated in venom. “My brother. Had to have been. Only the royal family would have known all of this, to exploit every weak spot in order.”
“Why would your brother…” Poe started, finally daring to speak up.
“He was jealous.” Laesynda said, the memories of him weighing her down, too. “Always jealous. He was the oldest, the heir to the throne. It still wasn’t enough for him. He was jealous (Y/N) was the Jedi of the family. Wanted it to be him.”
“Couldn’t have been our parents. I was asleep, Laesynda was ten. It had to have been Maddox.” You laughed bitterly, shaking your head. “Maker, if he wanted me dead so bad, I don’t know why he didn’t just destroy my pod and kill me himself.”
“Because we were there.” Leia said, voice soft. “We were too late to stop the initial attack, but…Han and Lando got the shields up. I guarded your pod. Luke handled the cultists.”
You pressed your lips together, nodding. “Thank you.”
“By the time the fight was over, all of the Healers’ Pendants had been destroyed or…lost. We tried to use the Force to open your pod, but they were designed with that in mind. Only a healer could open it and they were…all gone.”
You took a long breath, nodding as she explained.
Lando looked at you, features apologetic. “And if he is indeed in the First Order, alive after all this time, it stands to reason that…he wouldn’t be happy that you’re awake again, your Highness.”
“Right. Do we have any…intel that he is? On either account, alive or currently working with the First Order?” You asked, adjusting your posture. Your wings twitched. Rey reached for your hand and you gave it to her, the touch comforting, albeit simple.
“Not yet, your Highness, but…We’re working to figure that out. I just wanted to make sure we were all on the same page.” Lando said, turning the holo off with a click. “Wanted to make sure we all kept our guards up.”
Leia ran the team through a few other things, mostly preparation for new Resistance members she was anticipating. New quarters would have to be prepared, they’d have to arrange supplies and prepare to train dozens, maybe hundreds, of rookies.
After the meeting, you met Poe’s eyes for a moment. And then, you walked back to your quarters, paces brisk. Uncharacteristic of you to just leave one so early with no discussion of meal plans, no chatter with your peers, to just…disappear. Anyone who knew you would know there was something wrong. And Poe knew you.
The door slid shut behind you and you sat on the mattress, letting out a strangled yell, head in your hands, knees tucked up into your chest and wings flaring out behind you.
Your heart raced in the silence after the scream. The force of it, the Force of you had rattled the trinkets sitting on your dressers. You took a few breaths, leaning back against the wall and staring at the ceiling panel, tears streaming down your cheeks.
The door slid open again and Poe slipped inside, closing it behind him. He melted when he saw you there, looking utterly pathetic, you were sure.
“Hey, baby. You okay? That was some heavy stuff.” He crossed the room, sitting on the bed.
You shook your head and reached for him. He pulled you into his arms immediately, a large hand cradling your head, the other wrapped tight around you, legs draped over his. You buried your face in his shoulder, sobs muffled by his warmth.
He started tracing comforting patterns in your back, letting you get it all out before attempting to talk you through it.
“I feel so stupid, crying about it. It happened so long ago…” You confessed, voice soft and broken.
“Not for you.” Poe reasoned, pressing a kiss to your hairline. One gentle hand found your cheek and he used his thumb to gently wipe your tears away. “Everyone here knows it’s still fresh for you. Of course you’re torn up about it, I would be, too.”
You nodded, sniffling. “I always knew he hated me, but…I guess I just never knew how much. I thought after Endor, everything would cool off. But it doesn’t sound like that’s the case. It was quiet for a while, sure, but…I wasn’t here when things started getting bad. I wasn’t here to help when things got worse…”
He listened, empathy rooted deep in his warm brown eyes. “You’re here now.”
“Yeah, but…”
“What happened, happened. We can’t change the past, starlight.” He said, readjusting his hold, one arm cradling you while the other nestled against your cheek, still gently dabbing at your tears as they fell. “I’m just glad you’re here now. For selfish and unselfish reasons. Rey needs you. I need you. You’ve got a lot of good to do here, and you’ve already done so much.”
You nodded, absorbing his words. He was right. He always seemed to be. “What do you have going on today? Is there somewhere you need to be?”
“It can wait. I’m needed here.” He promised, pressing a kiss to your nose, gentle smile turning mischievous with a quirk of his eyebrow. “Besides, they’ll never find me in here.”
You couldn’t help but laugh a little. Poe never failed to bring a smile to your face, even when you were feeling like this.
“It’ll be alright, baby.” He reassured. The name still made your heart do flips in your chest. You much preferred it to your stuffy royal titles.
You sat further upright, kissing his soft pink lips. He kissed back, hand tilting your face just so with passionate precision. “I know it will. We’ll make sure of it this time.”
Rise of the Resistance
It wasn’t long before the new recruits started showing up. Lando ran what was akin to a shuttle service for a few weeks, running back and forth in a tiny transport, trying to avoid as much attention as possible. So far, it had worked.
The new folks were a bright bunch. Among them, Wedge Antilles, who had left behind his flight school, taking most of his pupils with him to help the cause.
“You know, as weird as this sounds, I missed it, Princess.” He admitted, hands on his hips, looking around the base, where soldiers ran in neat columns for their morning workout.
“Missed that Rebel air?”
He grinned. “Exactly that.”
Snap walked over, hugging him tightly and that was how you found out Wedge was Snap’s step-dad. Maker, it was a small galaxy after all. You and the other Jedi took a break from training, trying to help everyone get acclimated. You helped with giving tours, showed rookies where to get their breakfast and sleep, teaching them emergency protocol.
You set up a meditation room in an empty storage shed. It left something to be desired, but it was dimly lit, had some soft music playing, various toys and activities for Force training, cushions on the floor for those who could not float in the air while they meditated.
Aspen led some of the new recruits through while you were organizing your books.
“And this is Princess (Y/N) (L/N) of Mariposas, one of three Jedi we have on base.” She motioned to you. “If any of you think you might be Force-Sensitive, this is who you want to come to with questions.”
“We are always looking for new Jedi.” You said. “But this room is for everybody. If you need to get away for a bit, feel free to come here, do some meditation, read. It’s here for you. It gets rough out there, you need to take care of yourselves.”
Hours later, you had a tour group of your own, leading them through the comms center, then the mech workshop, droid repair, where BB-8 was getting a fresh paint job and beeped and whirred at you excitedly.
You led them past the hangar, where there were pilots milling around, about to head out on a perimeter check. Poe was there, stretching in that orange jumpsuit of his. You couldn’t fight the grin that formed when he spotted you, lighting up. He walked over, introducing himself to the group.
“Any pilots?” He asked, scanning your recruits, standing right next to you, hands on his hips, but his elbow brushing your side.
Professional. So, painfully professional.
“Reggie there.” You pointed him out and Reggie volunteered himself with a proud hand in the air.
“That’s the spirit. Welcome to the team, Reg.” He looked at you, glancing at your holo to take a peek at your schedule. “They’re not giving you too much trouble, I hope.”
“Nope, I’m all set with these guys. Bright bunch.” You replied, meeting those warm brown eyes, where mischief always seemed to sparkle.
“Right. Good. So, you don’t have anything penciled in after lunch?”
“I do not.” You confirmed.
“Alright. Well, uh, I’ve gotta hop in that X-Wing for perimeter checks. See you around, your Highness.” He promised, eyebrow quirked. He turned to Reggie. “Nice to meet you, Reggie. I’ll make sure you get acclimated.”
“Thank you, sir.” Reggie replied, starstruck.
You gave Poe a parting smile. Once the group had turned away, you glanced back. He motioned to the zipper of his jumpsuit, then looked at you with over-exaggerated expectation. Your jaw dropped and you rolled your eyes, laughing. Here in front of all of these people was not where you intended to use the Force to unzip his jumpsuit.
Still, you pinched your fingers together, focusing for a moment as you tugged it down the tiniest bit, just enough to tease him. He gasped, clearly not expecting you to actually do it. The way his eyes lit up, though, you could tell he was into it. Perhaps too into it.
The group didn’t notice, too busy buzzing about their future roles. Some of them were buzzing about other topics, like how hot your boyfriend was.
You moved them along to the next spot on the tour, but one of them pushed.
“Who was that?”
“Who, Commander Dameron?”
“He’s a Commander.” She giggled with the girl beside her. They couldn’t have been older than nineteen. It was kind of cute, admittedly. Harmless.
“Wow, he is something.” The other one agreed.
“Best pilot in the galaxy, in fact.” You chimed, heart surging with pride at your overly casual words. “I do think he’s seeing someone though, ladies.”
They both let out dramatic sighs. “Well, whoever they are, I hope they know how lucky they are.”
You chuckled, watching as his X-Wing pulled off into the air, doing a barrel roll right above the group. Now he was showing off. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t do something to you. “Oh she does.”
***
You ate lunch with Rey and Soren, welcoming a few of the new recruits to your table. Finn was busy with tours, too, training people to do various upkeep tasks around the base, keeping everything running smoothly. Poe was standing in the doorway and Rey looked up at him, then glanced at you, then back at him again.
“I think he’s trying to get your attention.” She chuckled, stabbing at the remains of her salad with a fork.
“Oh, is he?” You replied through a smile, still trying to keep up the act.
“I think he’s into you, you know. Finn and I talk about it sometimes.” She said, tone encouraging. “And he is his roommate. And his best friend.”
“Are you implying Finn has some information I should know?” You asked.
She laughed. “I very well may be. Honestly though, you should just go for it. I’ve never seen him look at anyone like that. May as well give it a shot.”
“Yeah.” You smiled at that. “Maybe I’ll go see what his deal is.”
“Good luck.” Rey said, watching as you crossed the room to where he was waiting in the doorway.
You met him with a cordial, professional smile. “Commander Dameron, is there something I can help you with?”
“Actually, yes, there is, Your Royal Highness.”
“Woah, busting out the big title? What’s the special occasion?”
“I was wondering if you’d like to take a walk down the hall with me.”
“Down the hall.” You said with a chuckle, pushing past him and leading him in that direction. Once you were out of earshot of the canteen, you muttered, “How romantic.”
“Oh I’ll show you romantic, Princess.” He replied, tugging open a closet door and grabbing your arm, pulling you inside. He locked the door with a careful click and then he was on you, calloused hands on your cheeks, lips fluid and hungry.
“Poe,” you mumbled into his lips, taken aback, heart revving like an engine.
“You wanna unzip it the rest of the way?” He asked, the rasp in his voice alone telling you he had been thinking about it all morning.
“That did something to you, huh?” You giggled into his mouth as he latched back on, his steps pushing until you hit the wall behind you.
“Sure did.” He agreed, releasing you and holding his arms open, orange jumpsuit there and ready for you, zipped nearly to the top. “Do it.”
“You sure?” You asked, raising a hand, wiggling your fingers with a coy smile on your face.
“Quit teasin’ me, baby.” He warned.
You bit back a laugh, focusing the zipper. You pinched your fingers together and pulled downwards, the zipper falling at your will without either of you touching it. He stared at it for a long moment, that  dangerous spark in his eyes again before he surged forward.
“That is…wow.” He murmured, fire behind his words. One hand cupped your cheek, the other holding your waist as he stepped closer, closer, closer, slotting himself between your legs.
You grabbed the sides of the jumpsuit, pulling it open, working it down his broad shoulders to reveal the thin white undershirt beneath. On top of it, the silver chain he always wore, a simple silver ring threaded through it. A ring you recognized as Shara’s.
“Rey and I had a…conversation…at lunch.” You said between kisses.
“Mmhmm, ‘bout what?” He asked, tilting your head and kissing down your neck. His other hand roamed lower, brushing across one of your wings, sending tingles up your arms.
You let out a shuttered breath, head tilting back against the wall. “She thinks…” another sigh escaped you as he continued to kiss the spot, jaw movements clouding your vision with stars, “you might be into me.”
His lips curled, poised over the vein on your neck. He paused for a moment. “Oh she does, does she?”
“Yeah, she has it on pretty good authority, apparently.” You said, daring to look down at him, at those dark, sultry eyes.
“Yeah, well, she’s not far off.” He breathed, going back in for your neck, determined to leave a mark in the short window of time you had before you and Soren were doing your ground perimeters. “I’m fucking obsessed with you, starlight.”
You moaned at his passioned ministrations on your neck, fingers threading through those lucious curls and giving a gentle tug. His hands hooked under your thighs and he hoisted you onto his hips, your back pressed against the wall of the tiny closet.
You met his eyes, breathless, wings fanned out behind you. “I can’t believe I get to have you, Poe Dameron.”
“Believe it.” He asserted, nose brushing against yours on the way to your lips. You cupped his cheeks with your hands, kissing all over his face before returning. “Kriff, I still wake up every day in disbelief that I get to do this in a closet with a Jedi Princess.”
“We won’t be in closets forever.” You whispered, eyes locking on his. It was a promise. Someday, everyone would know. It wouldn’t have to be a secret anymore.
He nodded, grinned. “Yeah, but…it is kinda thrilling, right?”
“Can’t argue with that.”
His eyes drifted down to your neck and he pulled a plush pink lip between his teeth, Adam’s apple bobbing. “Hey, uhhh…you have a turtleneck you can wear, right?”
Your jaw fell open. “You did not.”
“I might’ve.”
“You might’ve?” You shook your head. “Poe Dameron, what am I going to do with you?”
He pressed his forehead to yours, eyes half-lidded, lips ghosting across yours as he whispered, “More of this, I hope.”
***
Another week came and went. More recruits arrived, but things had hit something of a plateau. Still, your numbers were excellent, a far cry from the shell of a Resistance that had been left after Crait.
Poe was giving the new pilots a walk around the base, all of them suited up in their bright orange jumpsuits, having been fitted for them for the first time. You and Soren were out and about, dressed in your Jedi robes, lightsabers clipped to your belts. You must have just finished some training, he rationalized.
He noticed how some of the pilots in his group stared, watching the two of you with interest. He figured many of them had probably never seen a Jedi before. Hell, he hadn’t until Rey had moved those rocks from the mouth of the tunnel they’d all been trapped inside on that blasted salt planet.
“Is that one the Jedi Princess or the other Jedi?” one of the new pilots asked, voice hushed, as though you could hear his very thoughts at that distance.
“That one is the princess. You can tell by the wings.” Snap explained. “Poe’s good friends with her.��
Good friends. He thought to himself with a chuckle. Just like you and Karé are “good friends.”
“Is she single? Could you put in the good word?” another asked, earning elbows and enthusiastic hollers from his teammates.
Snap laughed out loud, glancing over at Poe, who could feel his ears burn. Cheeks, too.
“Oh, uhhh, Jedi actually aren’t allowed to fall in love.” He lied through a charming smile. “Believe me, I asked her myself. Breaks some ancient Jedi code or something. Sorry, fellas.”
The rookie pilots let out noises of disappointment and Poe couldn’t help but laugh to himself. There. That’d keep them off of you.
“They’re not, huh?” Snap asked, voice quiet enough that the others couldn’t hear. He motioned to you with his head. “Might want to tell her that.”
Snap was right. Poe glanced over and you were looking at him with that starry-eyed gaze. So lovesick he lost track of his footing, tripping right over BB-8, who had been rolling in front of him.
“Poe!”
Bee let out a series of disgruntled beeps and buzzes and he chuckled, embarrassed. He scratched the back of his neck. “Sorry, Bee. You okay, buddy?”
Bee beeped up at you, seemingly unharmed. He was a sturdy little guy, after all.
“I agree, he needs to watch where he’s going.” You said, hands on your hips. You offered one, helping him to his feet. “You hear that, Dameron?”
“Loud and clear, your Highness.” He chuckled, brushing himself off.
“No serious damage?”
“Not that I can find.” Poe blew the hair from his eyes.
You reached up and plucked a single leaf from his curls, handing it to him. “There. For your collection.”
“Thanks, I’ll put it with the rest of ‘em.” He said with a smirk. Poe turned to the assembled rookies, who were murmuring amongst themselves. “Pilots, Princess (Y/N), Princess (Y/N), our new crop of pilots. Get acquainted with her. If you crash in the middle of a fight, she’s the one that’s gonna catch your X-Wing.”
“If it doesn’t blow up before that.” Snap added, earning a few unsettled laughs from the group.
It was a dangerous job. You’d always known that. You liked to think that you helped protect them when you could. When it was possible to. But Poe was always taking a risk when he climbed into that cockpit, even for something as simple as checking perimeters. He knew it, too, which is what made him so damn brave.
“Right. That.” Poe agreed with a bitter chuckle. “How was training?”
“Good. Making progress.” You said, shrugging. You and Soren hadn’t done anything groundbreaking, just sparring. But still, it felt good, like you were both making habits, challenging each other and learning little quirks of battle.
“Good. Good. Well, see ya around.” He gave your arm an awkward little touch.
You couldn’t help but laugh as you returned to Soren, who had a knowing look on his face. You knew then that he knew. That that Jedi intuition had finally clocked what was going on. But he didn’t say anything. Saved you the trouble of explaining yourself, why you were hiding it. 
The Resistance had enough going on. They didn’t need the drama of one of the Jedi entangled with their ace pilot. Especially if something went wrong.
Tags: @cap-lu20
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polaris-stuff · 4 months
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Okay, this is the fourth time of me rewriting this comment.
And i am gonna try and keep it short ( I failed I am so sorry) . As this is about the Heart to Heart with earth.
Feel free to ignore this if you don't wanna talk about it anymore. If you said something about , I've been trying to put my feelings on this out for a while and it's just not working. (it's also now 4 am, )
I came away from the episode feeling like it was a good episode. Where the characters talked about why they were deciding not to help moon for different reasons.
I thought for most of them it was in character, even if I don't fully agree. I could see what the show was trying to do.
And then i see a lot of people agreeing and being really hurt by the episode. Because they feel like everyone is aboning moon. And leaving him in this vulnerable space.
I feel like i missed something. As to me. the celestial family isn't fully aware as to truly how bad Moon's mental state has gotten.
I have a feeling that (Sun and Lunar, more so then earth) Are taking moon's last words as face value ( wanting to bring solar back for ego/selfish reasons, and not because he truly breaking down)
(I also think monty still hasn't fully filled them in either that moon seems to be thinking he isn't real but I could be wrong!)
I think they'd be behaving otherwise if they know the true depts. they wouldn't wich is why this sucks so much. Moon is driving people away, actively sabotaging his own help.
I sit here wishing i would understand that hurt. I honestly truly do. Maybe because i have the feeling that they will help even if they say now they won't
maybe because i really hope sun isn't gonna make the same mistake as moon.
Maybe i am i giving sun, lunar and earth to much credit, and to many excuses.
I think...in the end. I don't think them refusing to help moon. Is them trying to hurt moon (even if that is the outcome) . But is taking care of themselves as they are all also still not in a good place?
And maybe because i genuinely can't see what they can do for moon to help him. As they offered him help but he refused or actively lied on how he was doing. So I don't get what help people want them to provide for moon at this moment. ( besides not leaving, but can you be there for someone that doesn't want you there?)
I dunno if i am making sense. trying to talk my feelings out is always hard. And I think for the first time I am on the other side of most of the people I usually agree with and respect a lot ( you being one of them ) . So I feel a bit lost and weird about it as to why my view is so different.
( I am honestly hoping Sun will see Moon having hallucinations, and at least will set something up so moon is never alone in that cell like he was. I feel like he thinks, he first needs to stop moon. And then when that is done. He can actively think on what to do next cause offering help first ain't gonna do it)
I am sorry for leaving this long ass comment in your inbox. I truly hope It didn't come off as attacking. AS it wasn't meant to be. Just a fellow TSAMS fan. who was in their own way very confused and hurt i guess and feels a bit alone in their reading of the story?
And trying to understand why people see this a an attack from the celestial family on moon. Or a active decision...instead of .. a series of what is gonna be a slew of bad decisions from everyone involved.
-Noffy.
Alright, I understand your point of view, don't worry about it, and actually, this is a YT series on VRchat so I shouldn't be so mad about this either yk JAJA
Ok, the thing is, the family doesn't know what's happening to Moon, that's right, they have no way of knowing what's happening to him because Moon pushed them all away and lied to them, now, the thing is that Earth knows. Monty told Earth that Moon had a psychosis episode and found him hitting the ground, that Moon could no longer tell what was real from what wasn't, so Earth knows that Moon is in a HORRIBLE mental state. And idk, but if you know that a person is in a state where they can no longer perceive reality correctly, I don't think the best response is not to help them.
Also, I'll highlight Lunar going from "I really don't care" (although he should care, we're talking about Moon, one of his brothers) to "fuck him" which is just weird?? The whole family was with Lunar and supported him when the thing with Eclipse happened but Lunar just does not care when something happens to another family member ??
I'm 100% sure that Sun will help Moon, it's more than obvious that Moon will get out of this situation, but the way the family is handling it is so strange to me. Lunar, Earth and Sun have every right to not want to continue dealing with problems but this is also partly their fault.
Since Solar died no one was with Moon because "Moon was busy", so Moon was alone in P&S with Ruin whispering in his ear and only Lunar went to see him a couple of times. Sun began to hang out more with Earth and Lunar, and Moon was left completely alone. "Oh, but Moon never said he wanted them to come with him! They can't read minds!" Yes, and that's true, but If everyone was aware that Moon and Solar were basically running around together every day, and everyone was aware that Moon was the one who had the worst reaction to Solar's death, the logical thing to do is to spend at least a couple of hours with him, right?
And yes, Moon lied about how he felt so this is also partly his fault for wanting to hide what was happening to him. But Monty is also to blame because he also hide it.
We are at a point where we have been shown that all the hallucinations that Moon has had are created by her consciousness out of guilt (in the same way as Sun when the BM thing happened), Moon regrets the things he said to Earth, Moon wants to stop, Moon wants to go home and apologize, but he can't. He thinks his whole family hates him, that no one wants him in daycare.
Also, I understand that Earth is hurt but she also isn't trying to understand Moon's feelings now that she knows everything Moon has been going through. Now she knows that Moon is going through the worst time of her life and she just decides not to do anything about it because "Moon said a couple of hurtful things to her." (things Sun warned Moon would say to push her away and things that worked).
I feel like of all the people, the only one who has a little more reason here is Sun, and, interestingly, Jack and the computer, who have done more than Earth and Lunar.
I think that now that he is locked up and unable to teleport it is a good opportunity for everyone to talk to him, a really serious and good intervention.
Sorry for the long text! And thanks for the ask and support! It really helped me let off some steam, hehe
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Condal and Co basically managed to destroy the green fandom and I hate it so much . Now everyone is stanning one specific TG character and hate all the others. And when the leaks came out, many were saying how the writers' bs won't change anything and that they would always love Aegon, Aemond, Alicent... But we got this situation. You are one of the rare blogers who actually kept their word about supporting these characters and I really respect that. Do you think that something could change in the future regarding this or TG fandom is dead for good? I'm not optimistic, honestly. 9 don't get why such a big chunk of the fandom is eating up every bs Condal serves and give his team a pass while hating on the characters and thus making the experience in this already unbearable fandom even worse.
Hello!
First of all, thank you so much for your ask! Every time there is a proof that one more person in the fandom does not roll with the writers' BS feels like getting a gift, truly.
Being in the HotD fandom has never been easy, and right now it's nigh unbearable indeed. Seeing some bloggers making posts in support of the entirety of TG the day before episode 4 aired and writing something along the lines of "This is an Aemond hate blog now" after they watched it was disheartening to say the least. Not to mention the general rise in numbers of "Aemond should have killed his bitch of a brother long time ago", "I can't wait for this one eyed freak to die" and "Alicent is the worst mother ever, what a disgusting woman" posts.
The thing is, I can understand becoming emotional over a character's fate or their actions. But when so many people flat out ignore the fact that the actions in question are, first and foremost, the result of a terrible writing choices and choose to hate the character (and much worse - the people who support this character) - that's when it gets really bad. So, as to your question, I'm not really hopeful about the future state of affairs in the fandom either. Things will hardly get much better - not with the way many of particular TG characters' supporters simply do not wish to see anything beyond the fact that their fave was somehow wronged.
And the worst thing about it is that it looks like the hate wave is hitting not only characters but actors as well. I deliberately didn't look for details (I am already upset about the general situation and don't want it exacerbated) but according to a few posts I saw here and info from people I trust some of Tom's fans started to attack Ewan on Twitter and Tiktok - and IMO it's both vile and stupid. Are they expecting Tom to give them a pat on the shoulder and a kiss on the cheek for talking shit about his friend and colleague because he's doing his job? Is it really the best way (or any way at all) to support the actor you admire?
Given all this, one begins to cherish those who remain respectful even more.
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human-space-heater · 1 year
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incorrect quotes (featuring the hazbin hotel cast part 1)...(I am aware im in a ton of fandoms)
Charlie: Pros and cons of dating me. Charlie: Pros. You'll be the cute one. Charlie: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-
Alastor : My life isn't as glamourous as my wanted poster makes it look.
Nifty: Operation no more distractions is a go! *not even 10 seconds later* Nifty: Oh, look! A butterfly! 
Vaggie: I don't dab. I stab.
Alastor : The real treasure was the memories we made along the way. Angel: I almost died. Alastor : That... was my favorite memory.
Alastor : The shadow realm? No, I’m sending you to Ohio!
Cherri: It's not like I try to blow things up, exactly. It just sort of happens. You've got to admit though, fire is fascinating.
Charlie: I came out here to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now.
Husk: I'm not a morning person. I'm barely even a person.
*Angel  is substitute teaching* Student: What did you say? Angel : I said, whoever threw that paper, your mom’s a hoe!
Alastor : What, I can’t be in a bad mood? It’s like people think, “Oh, Alastor  is such a nice person, Alastor  is so happy-go-lucky! Alastor  can’t be in a bad mood!” Well, you know what? Alastor  CAN be in a bad mood. And right now, Alastor  IS be in a bad mood.
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