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gnocchisworld · 2 days

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Beautiful Stranger

Joost Klein x singer!reader

Summary: reader is playing at a festival and her set is right after Joost's, they meet in the backstage tent after his stage and hang out after reader does hers! Rumors circulate after fans spotted the pair and they reconnect after missed opportunities when they were together :PP

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: no use of y/n, YEARNING! no physical description of reader but uses of she/her and feminine descriptors!

A/N: omgomg this is my first fic ever on here so anyways I am a firm believer of the meeting people twice theory like yes second chances yes reconnection yes!

Entering the backstage tent of the festival, you were immediately hit with a wave of scorching heat, the sun's relentless rays seeping even through the canvas. The energy from the performance on stage outside was pulsing and lively, carried by the young artist who commanded the crowd's attention, music increasing the adrenaline in your blood. Yet even as you prepared for your own set, the background noise and excitement faded to a muted hum as you focused on your vocal exercises and cues. As you readied yourself, the atmosphere surrounding you was as sultry and intense as the heat outside, the hot air seemingly alive with a buzz of anticipation.

With as much haste as the sound disappeared from your brain, a new, baritone voice flowed through the air.

“Ah, sorry. Didn’t see you here.”

You looked up from your daze and were met with a deep, hypnotic blue, one that would make even the skies jealous. The angles of his nose were perfectly shaped, as if God had taken extra time to mould the clay that would later take on his form. From the standpoint of a bystander, the two would seem like the sun and the moon; two opposites that seemingly complimented each other like second nature. As the silence lingered for a second too long and his gaze set comfortably on yours, you choked up the first words that came to mind.

“No worries! I was just lost in my own world there for a moment.”

He was entirely captivating — you were unsure of how to compose yourself as you burned under his stare. As if reading your mind, he quickly offers his hand out to you, eager to make any form of connection.

“You can call me Joost.” He urges, carefully tracing his eyes over every line in your face for a reaction.

Taking his hand in yours, you promptly share your name. A subtle yet powerful exchange — trading names — the fibres in which every invisible string between two people begins to entangle together. His hands felt as though they had once held the warmth of a flame, having the ability to breathe life into anything it touched. For lack of better word, you were electrified.

A careful knocking on the stage door alerted the two and prompted the release of your hands. Your manager walks in, choosing to ignore the other figure in the room.

“Sorry, you’re on in 3.”

“I’ll be there, thanks, Jere.” He nods, closing the door with relative ease and resuming whatever words he was muttering into his walkie-talkie.

A beat passes as Joost speaks up again, “Succes!” Smiling fervently, he lightly brushes the skin on your shoulder with his palm as he walks out into his own dressing room before you could even respond, taking with him the warmth of his presence.

Unsure of how to make sense of what had happened, you drowned in your own quandary. The blood in your veins were still pounding against the valves of your beating heart and your kidney was beginning to beat to the same rhythm. You were unsure of whether this was due to stage fright or your recent encounter, though it didn’t really matter anyways; it was the fact that they were both valid options.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

As you step on stage, the roar of the crowd engulfed your senses like a crashing wave. Your eyes scan the sea of bodies, a kaleidoscope of colours and faces all there to witness your performance. Unconsciously, you were scouring for the blue that looked at you as if you had been the only girl in the world.

Unbeknownst to you, he had joined the crowd to experience the passion that you had brought out with your music — he wanted to get to know you, and music is the window to one’s soul. As you sang your first song, it became adamantly clear to him how the atmosphere shifted and every light softened under your radiance. Your music highlighted the more subtle hues in life that Joost had not seen in awhile, eliciting memories of lustrous summers and fleeting springs; it felt as if his world, which was always turning at 100 kilometres an hour, began to slow. Your voice was mellow, it filled his eardrums and calmed the ringing which usually reverberated in every corner of his skull. He took note of everything you did, from the way you held your guitar to the reds blossoming on your fingertips as you held down on its strings. Ultimately, he was hopelessly captivated — by your lulling melody, your beauty, and the entirety of your being.

Diverting your eye from your guitar to the crowd, you locked your gaze on a familiar aquamarine — a shade you couldn’t get out of your head as it bloomed in your peripheral vision. A smile played on your lips; you couldn't help it. It was as if the corners of your mouth were tugged at, forcing them to curve upwards. The warmth which was previously absent in your stomach began to reignite and it felt as if rainbows were being drawn on the skies of your psyche. Being on stage in front of thousands has never felt so intimate before.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

As your final song comes to an end, your cheeks are numb from the constant smiling — not performatively but rather from sheer happiness. You step off the stage and back into the backstage tents, still dazed from the trance you were under as you had, prior, melted under the beautiful stranger’s gaze. You could feel a familiar set of eyes linger on you and you’re met at eye level with two deep blue pools. He spoke up gently, breaking the silence between the two before it could settle on your shoulders.

Joost grins at you, his eyes still sparkling with the same intensity as before. "You were phenomenal up there," he says. "I couldn't take my eyes off you."

You felt your cheeks flush a rosy pink, with a shy smile you replied, “you weren’t too bad either.”

Joost let out a hearty chuckle, amused by your comment. "Just 'not too bad'?" he teased, feigning offence. A beat passes as you forget to answer, as if wind had been sucked out of you from the mere sight of his laughter. Taking the initiative, he inquires you; “Hey, uh, I was thinking of walking around some more, take a look at some other stages if you wanted to hang out for a bit?”

Your eyes sparkle with a glint of excitement, “I was actually thinking the same thing — I’d love to join you.” Your voice cracking ever so subtly, betraying your nervous plight.

Carefully, he took your hand and started walking out of the tent, leading you towards the next stage — “so you don’t get lost.”

As you shuffle through the labyrinth of crowds, your bodies are constantly pushed together, every small touch prompting an exchange of warmth in return. His doting predisposition was almost overbearing, each time he looked back to make sure you were still behind him was so subtle, yet so appetent. The implications of it all, his hands on yours as you traverse the field of human bodies, wide open for the consumption of a myriad of prying eyes, was not lost on either of you, yet it remained a fact that both of you choose to ignore.

Breathing away the air of silence encapsulating the two of you, he speaks up. “What kind of music are you into? Like what artist do you want to see right now?”

You hadn’t realised how your gaze was so readily fixed on him — as if it were a force of habit, until his voice fills the silence you’d had in your head; racing at 100 kilometres an hour to catch up to the speed of your heart. Without much time to formulate a response, you quickly mutter the first few words that enter your thoughts. “I’ll watch anyone! Plus — maybe you could introduce me to some new music?”

Your words elicited a gentle smile as he tugged you towards a new area; “truth be told I don’t know who’s performing either — but we can discover together!”

As you settle into the crowd and your bodies blended in to the splatter of colour amidst dancing souls, he rested his hand on the small of your back, fingers fidgeting with the fabric of your top — holding dear to you and praying to a higher being so as to not get partitioned in the middle of thousands.

Although you were sure your attention was focused on the performance just ahead, you could feel each time his gaze averted into your eye line — his stare burned into your cheek the same way a kiss would; searing your flesh with a romance that lingered like sun rays on burnt skin. You used each chance he looked away to do the same — to leave a persistent stain on his peripheral vision which sent his heart to the moon. This prolonged back and forth lasted all the way to the end of the artist’s set, his songs being nothing more than background noise as your heart pounded prolifically in your ears.

Eager to extend your time together, you asked to buy him a drink — with which he gladly accepted.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

Minutes passed into hours discreetly — you were lost in conversations about everything and nothing at the same time, until the noise settled and the crowd thinned, bringing your conversation down to weak attempts at staying in each other’s company.

You take the final sip of your drink; you promised yourself this’d be the last. Eased by the momentum of your mutual exchange, you ask him: “Do you ever look out into the crowd and realise that every person that everyone’s ever met was brought together by chance?”

“Like how your set just so happened to be right after mine?”

Hesitantly, you replied, stepping on eggshells as you cherry pick each word carefully, trying to gauge some meaning behind your blooming relationship. “Yeah, I mean like what if I hadn’t been in that tent when you came in? Would you still watch my set? Would you be having a drink with me right now?”

“I’m pretty sure someone with a presence like yours would’ve caught my attention one way or another.” His response was delivered almost immediately, as if the answer were the most obvious thing in the world.

Attempting to hide the smile inevitably slipping onto your face and the pink creeping up your cheeks, you let out a sincere chuckle. “I’m glad you think so.”

As your conversations drift with the sunlight, a call from your manager reminds you of your responsibilities, prompting an exchange of see you soons and subtle glances over the shoulder as you both depart from each other’s warmth.

It was hard to be around him — to be close but not close enough. To say he charmed you would be an understatement, and to say that he didn’t feel the same would be a lie. Being back in your hotel room reminded you of how intoxicating it felt to be near him, and it felt like an itch as you traced back the steps that you took so carefully around him; how the two of you danced around each other so gently. You weren't sure you'd ever cross paths again; the regret of not being forward about how you'd felt with him loomed around you as you lay in bed, phone in hand, wondering if he was still thinking about you. His name rested on the tip of your tongue as you drifted off to sleep, naturally burrowing a home in your chest.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

Waking up to waning notifications and texts hardly alerted you as you were seemingly stuck in the same state of wonderstruck that you had been in the day before. As you recollect your fleeing consciousness, the blots of colour on your screen begin to form coherent shapes, revealing texts from your manager and PR team, all addressed at several tweets and posts discussing you; their messages growing more and more panicked with each one. With a deep breath, you clicked on the Twitter app, bracing yourself for what you knew was coming.

The tweets were overwhelming, discussing everything from your performance to your interaction with Joost. People were making assumptions about your relationship and dissecting every detail of your interaction.

Mindlessly scrolling through the barrage of tweets, a text from a number you have labelled as “Joost :)” halts every single movement and thought previously in motion.

J: hello girlfriend :D

R: joost?

J: have u seen what theyre saying about us??

R: its really brutal

they dont hesitate

J: this is my first time experiencing something like this (・´з`・)

R: me too!

i hope youre ok with that kind of stuff though, its pretty intrusive

J: yup, but im going to have to get used to this (╥﹏╥)

and you are cute, so i dont mind (⁀ᗢ⁀)

R: oh thank you, youre cute too :D

You smiled as you read Joost's messages, feeling a warm sense of relief and happiness. Despite the gossip and speculation online, he seemed to be handling it all in stride – easing any preexisting worry that he’d be weirded out or pushed away by the assumptions forced upon you and your relationship. You stared intently at your screen, your fingers hovering anxiously over the keypad. Your heart rate quickened as you contemplated hitting send on the message, a wave of trepidation washing over her.

R: maybe we can talk more over lunch? just to make sure ure all good!

Was it too desperate? Did it seem like you wanted a second? First? Date amidst an unfortunate impasse? Would he be discouraged? Did he even want to see you again?

J: i’d love 2!!!!

Oh. You release the breath you hadn’t noticed you were holding in, letting the pressure dissipate from your shoulders. Despite the weight of the situation, you found solace in knowing that he had playfully accepted the circumstances and was willing to brace the full extent of the accusations by risking another day with you. Finalising the details for lunch, you got ready and swiftly made your way out the door – towards the destined spot.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

Stumbling through the city, you took in the sights as you passed by slews of oscillating buildings and unnamed parks. Unanswered messages from your manager remain rigid and unread as you lock away your phone, looking forward for signs of the restaurant you were to meet Joost in. Determination sets in to the anterior parts of your brain – the tenacity to express your interest in growing together with the man you had just met the day prior. Although it was sudden, you were sure that getting to know him would only continue to confirm the feelings beginning to harbour at the base of your judgement. Rounding the last corner, you were hit by a familiar warmth; it was sudden, intrusive, preponderant, and all-consuming simultaneously.

“Hallo!” The Dutch accent slipped into his greeting like honey, the same baritone voice you’d come to be acquainted with to fill the air around you, as a blanket would. Suddenly every smell, minute sound, or gentle breeze that was prevalent became subdued – every one of your senses focusing on the presence of the alluring companion standing in front of you.

Your grin evident in your voice, you reply tenderly, “hello, stranger.”

#joost klein x reader #joost klein #joost klein fanfic #joost x reader #x reader #joost klein x you #joost #joost fic #joost klein fic #smau #eurovision #joost klein imagine #joost klein fluff #europapa

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coloursflyaway · 16 hours

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i'm finally going through the comments on heaven to no one else but me (i'm so sorry for the delay, btw, but i was gone over the weekend and you guys were SO sweet that i wanted to take the time to reread everything and make sure i'd respond properly) and i just had A Thought.

i've been putting charles through the ringer lately, which i love doing, because that boy suffers so prettily. but how about a fic in which through magical hijinks charles loses his memory, and edwin is the one left behind?

and charles is like he always is, which is bright and happy and clever and wonderful, and he takes to edwin like he did last time ("so we're best friends? that's pretty cool, i never thought i'd get a best friend this clever! how do you put up with me?") and he's the same, but also, he's not.

because all the time they had together changed charles, just like they changed edwin, and there is something impossibly nostalgic about seeing charles like this, like a snapshot of thirty years ago, but at the same time, it's the most painful experience of edwin's life, because charles has forgotten everything about what made them them.

the synergy isn't there anymore, the ease they usually move with together, the references to older cases and the inside jokes they have.

one time, edwin holds out his hand on instinct; charles asks, "huh? what do you need?" instead of putting their magic screwdriver into it.

edwin doesn't do it a second time.

and there is a beauty, maybe, in watching charles get to know him again, but god, it breaks edwin's heart every second of the way.

and they go through remedy after remedy and nothing works, and edwin has to face the possibility that he might still have a best friend, but he'll never get His Best Friend back, and it's not enough to destroy him, because charles is still there, but god, it is close.

(charles, at the same time, is baffled by everything edwin knows about him and how close they must have been and is this really everything, is edwin keeping something from him? did they - he can hardly think it, because surely it can't be true, this doesn't happen to him, he's not worth of this happening to him - kiss? is this why edwin looks at him so dejectedly when he thinks charles doesn't notice?)

and charles keeps asking questions, like he is trying to figure something out, until one day, he kisses edwin. straight on the lips, a hint of a question in the curve of his mouth, and edwin is both overwhelmed and devastated, because this is what he had been hoping for before charles had lost his memory, and yet he cannot enjoy it now, because it's not His Charles; and yet he cannot pull away, because it is Still Charles and edwin loves him in any way he can.

it feels like cheating somehow, but what if he'll never get charles back, what if this is all that is left of their friendship now?

so he kisses back anyway, and when charles smiles against his lips, edwin thinks maybe, just maybe, it could be okay.

only that a few days, or maybe a few weeks later, something happens and charles suddenly looks at him and he's Back, edwin can see it in his eyes, and -

-and how can he explain this to charles now, that he let himself be kissed by charles when he was not himself, how can he look charles in the eyes when he knows that he has taken advantage of him like this, has he gotten his best friend back now only to lose him again because he couldn't control himself around charles and-

-and charles smiles at him, says, "hi. good to be back. i missed you."

and he takes edwin's hand, who still cannot speak, cannot think, and presses a kiss to the back of it.

"guess i just had to start all over again to realise i could absolutely fall in love with you, huh?" he says, and he looks at edwin like he used to a week ago, like he used to a decade ago, and edwin is crying before he knows it, fingers curling around charles' to hold onto him.

"did you?", he asks, and charles just laughs, sweet and happy and safe.

"oh absolutely. although i think i might have started thirty-odd years ago."

#one day i will not only consist of thoughts about them but today is not that day #dead boy detectives #dead boy detective agency #edwin payne #edwin paine #charles rowland #painland #payneland #paynland #chedwin #charles x edwin #edwin x charles

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cripplecharacters · 2 days

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Hello!! I’m a fic writer and have had the idea of giving one of the characters I’m writing for prosopagnosia. Within the canon, he mistakes the protagonist for someone he used to know (the protagonist is unable to correct him) and doesn’t realize his mistake until much later on, where he then comments that the two aren’t actually similar at all, in reference to their personalities. He’s also known to refer to people with notable visual traits, at least in the online circles I’ve run in.

I have a couple smaller questions in regards to how I should proceed:

Is it reasonable for him not to have been aware that the way he perceives faces is different?

Would it be incorrect to have him identify others by facial features? Not in the sense of “the one with the short nose” or anything, but “this one has red eyes” and “that one has a scar”. Something easily picked out on the face. Would those be identifiable traits at all?

My fic isn’t meant to have much of an overarching plot, and it’s just supposed to be funny/slice of life. This character is important though and will be a consistent presence. What jokes might my characters make, what jokes should I avoid making, and what jokes is the character going to hear the most and get sick of real quick?

Thank you for your ask! Whether or not he realizes he can’t recognize faces depends on both his character and the severity of his prosopagnosia, as it can range from difficulty differentiating faces to being unable to distinguish faces from objects. From the experience of myself and most people I know with prosopagnosia he’d probably just assume he’s bad with faces and not think any deeper than that, but it isn’t a universal experience.

It's also fine if he recognizes people by unique facial features! Despite not being able to picture someone's face he could try to remember key aspects of someone’s face like a prominent mole or a crooked nose, though I agree something like ‘short nose’ is too vague. The more unique and prominent, the easier he’ll have remembering it (to clarify when I say ‘remembering’ I mean remembering that they have that feature, not being able to picture it). He can also try recognizing people by clothes they always wear or unique hairstyles, though it can get confusing if someone decides to change their hair or he meets a stranger with the same hat as his one friend. The easiest way for me to recognize someone is by their voice or calling their name and waiting for them to respond.

Have a nice day!

Mod Rot

Hi!

Usually I identify people by hairstyle or specific articles of clothing, although unique traits like a scar or red eyes would certainly help as confirmation! (Of course, personality as well--but speaking about visual traits, this is what I look for.)

I hate when people change their hairstyles, it makes them totally unrecognizable for a while. Often I can figure out who someone is a few minutes into a conversation, maybe shorter for people I know really well, but changes to big recognizable features throw me off. (Don't ask how many times I've been in conversations with people and had No Idea who I was talking to...)

So yes, it's realistic to go off facial features, although non-face features may be more common as an identifier. It's also realistic to mistake someone for another person entirely. I often think people look alike and they just are similar heights with similar hairstyles to non-face-blind people.

Joke-wise, I make fun of myself for not recognizing people. It's embarrassing, sure, but in hindsight it makes a good story. I don't like being teased about it, it makes me feel bad or inadequate that I can't recognize people. But when I do it? Funny story!

Mod Rock

Hello,

As someone with a similar condition (I've always heard it referred to as face blindness,) I use a few different things to recognize people;

Glasses. A lot of people I know have unique glasses and I use those to recognize them. I know this person because they have blue, red, and gold glitter in their glasses, and I know this person because she has electric teal wire-frame glasses.

Hair. This only works when people have an unusual hair colour or style. If someone has one side of their head buzzed, I recognize them by that. If someone has very long red hair, I recognize them by that.

I also look at distinct facial features. I know someone who wears red contacts and I recognize them by that. Something like a scar or very distinct facial features can help me recognize someone.

Voices. I'm not excellent at recognizing voice but I can recognize a distinct vocal quirk, like a Louisiana accent.

Context is also important. The biggest thing I struggle with is recognizing people out of their usual context. I struggle to recognize most of my old classmates outside of high school and school-related functions like graduation ceremonies. If I see an old classmate or even a family member in the drive-thru, it's hard to recognize them unless they have something distinct about them or I know them really well (such as if they were in my friend group.)

And then there are little things I pick up on that help me recognize people I wouldn't otherwise recognize. I work in a drive-thru so I can recognize a lot of people by their orders or by the cars they drive. I can recognize a few people based on their names when they order on the mobile app- if they order and don't use the app, it takes me a minute. I can recognize most of the regulars because they usually know my name and make conversation.

And yes, like you mentioned, personalities.

I didn't know I struggled to perceive and recognize faces for a very long time, I thought everyone was the same way. If it had never been pointed out to me, I probably still wouldn't know that I need to do things differently. It's not something that's easy to notice without outside help telling you that no, actually, most people can recognize people they know or even people they've met a few times.

So yes, he sounds very realistic based on my experience. He sounds like he has it pretty severely. And, by the way, the same situation happens to me all the time. And it's extremely embarrassing when it happens.

I make a lot of "I barely recognized you!" jokes with people who know I have face blindness. They aren't extremely funny but it's my way of saying "You've changed something about your appearance" or "Wow, it's been a long time!" I don't know of many face blindness jokes either, it's not something we often have the opportunity to joke about. If he draws people, he might make a joke about "Yeah, this probably isn't the best career" or "I know, don't quit my day job." Or he could do something kind of like Toph Beifong and react to someone else's art with "Don't worry, I think it looks exactly like the person." Maybe if they're looking for someone and he points out a random person like "Hey, there they are!" only for the group to realize he's messing with them?

Maybe you could repurpose some blind jokes and make them about "I can't recognize people" instead of about "I can't see"?

Mod Aaron

#mod rot #mod aaron #mod rock #prosopagnosia representation #face blindness #writing reference #writing advice #anonymous

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waywardwritesstuff · 1 day

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Hello, could you create a headcanon for ROTTMNT where Leo and Donnie, separately, fall in love with a female reader who can transform into a giant white snake?

Donnie and Leo x F!Reader Head canons

Tags: romantic, female reader, feelings, confessions Word Count: 900+

Summary: Donnie/Leo fell in love with reader. They didn't plan on it happening but guess what? It did. But how did they act? How did this all go about?

Leonardo

Leo at first was very embarrassed about it, he had known you just as long as he had known April, and you were very important to him. Not to mention the two of you were quite close compared to his brothers.

But despite his feelings, he wasn't a coward, and he wasn't afraid, so he decided to take you out to a sewer pipe he had found perfect for skateboarding and decided to tell you there.

As the two of you were skating around, you in your human form so you could have two legs to stand on the board in the first place, you noticed Leo started to act strange.

"So...you have a boyfriend?" he says out of no where

A bit confused but seeing nothing wrong with his question you answer

"No. Why? Are you interested haha?" You decide to say cheekily, but if you were being honest, you had a small crush on Leo but figured that it was only one-sided, so you never said anything, but that didn't stop you from making "jokes" about it.

"Maybe, what would you say if it did" Leo responded

You are a little unsure now, you are not used to Leo giving a response that wasn't a joke.

"Leo what are you doing" you stop skating now and turn to look at him fully

"What? I'm not doing anything?"

"Your being weird and you know it"

"Can't I ask my friend about their dating life?"

"You can't, not so seriously at least. What is going on"

He hesitates and his green skin starts to darken on his cheeks. Is he blushing? You didn't even know turtles could blush

"Maybe for once I'm not joking, Y/N I have feelings for you" And there it is, he said it. Finally putting his feelings out into the open.

"Leo that's not funny" you say getting a little bit frustraed. This isn't a funny joke and you don't want him messing around with your feelings. Is he doing this because he knows how you feel about him or is he doing it because he genuinely feels the same

"I promise you for once this is not a joke"

"You're being serious"

"I swear on Hueso's Pepperoni Pizza"

Oh shit, he's being serious

"Well, I feel the same. How come it took you so long to tell me?"

"How come it you so long to tell me"

"Touche" You concede

"So are we going to make this official or are we just gonna sit here with these confessions" He asks

With the adrenaline that is now rushing through your body, you step forward and wrap him in a tight hug, giving him a small kiss on his plastron as he wraps his arms around you and plants his own kiss on your forehead.

Donatello

Donnie didn't understand his feelings at first. He ignored the feeling in his stomach whenever the two of you talked, blamed it on bad pizza. He just went about his day like normal and tried not to think about how you made him feel.

But he couldn't deny how important you were to him. He liked listening to you talk, though sometimes he thought you might be a little bit silly he still found whatever you spoke about interesting, simply because you were the one talking. And he cherished the moments when you would sit and listen to him ramble on and on. He knew people got bored of his ranting easily, but you never seemed to lose interest. It was comforting.

Eventually, he figured out what his feelings were and he had no idea what to do about it. He had never had romantic feelings before and he had never been in a relationship. What was he supposed to do?

One day when the two of you were just chatting with him in his room/lab he went quite, which was highly unusual for him. Even when you were talking he was either working on something or simply muttering along to your train of thought.

"Y/N, have you ever fallen in love with anyone?" he asks bluntly

You look at him quizzically waiting for him to go on

"You know...like those feelings when you like someone a lot more than a friend" he explains

"Yes I know what 'falling in love' is, but why do you ask?"

"Well I think that I might have fallen in love with someone, but I do not know what I am supposed to do with those feelings"

"You could tell them how you feel" I say simply

Donnie has a blank look on his face like this was the most insane answer I could have given.

"Ok, well I love you"

You blink once, twice. Before what he says sinks in

"Wait, me? I am the person you fell in love with? But...I'm a mutant" you say hesitantly, why would Donnie fall in love with a mutant snake such as yourself, even other mutants found you frightening.

"So? So am I? What difference does it make?"

You stop "It doesn't but...you really feel that way about me"

"Yes" he says but their is a hesitant note to his voice "Do you not share these feelings"

You were taken aback, you thought after all this time your feelings would have been more obvious to Donnie but apparently not

"Yes of course! I just never said anything because I thought you only saw me as a friend"

"Well I did-" he says truthfully "-but something changed"

Feeling so overcome with emotions you slither up to Donnie and wrap your arms around him before remember how he feels about hugs. But before you can pull away fully he wraps his own arms around you in return.

You couldn't have been more happy in this moment. And you hope to share more moments like this with Donnie in the future.

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chaostroberry1 · 2 days

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Hi! Can I Request a dom! Poseidon and or Hades x female sub!wife reader who is sweet/shy, and kinda oblivious, and they just got married and are trying to navigate their life together as newlyweds. I think logically they would have na age gap as well because I believe (could be mistaken in Poseidon’s case) that their wives were younger than them in the myths. If you could make them dotting towards reader too (bit colder than the depths of the sea/Underworld to everyone else), I just really want a sweet obsessive take on their relationship without them being too ooc if this makes sense. Kinda like they fell for reader and they fell harder almost Yandere level obsessed with her. I really loved your Hades x male reader but really want to see you take on this if it’s not too much to ask. I hope my word vomit makes sense.

This is such a cute idea 😆 thank you!

Note : hades and Poseidon are not romantic/ or shipped to each other! ⚠️ I do not support incest. They are only romantic towards reader, but not each other. Cus they are brothers. They only have love towards their darling.

Hades + Poseidon × reader headcanons.

- tbh, how on earth did you bag not one, but TWO of the strongest gods there is? That's crazy...😭

- not only did you get hades, but Poseidon??? Now you must have accomplished some sort of feat to earn him. Or you were just very loved by the gods. Let's all nod our heads in agreement.

- Considering that there are two of them, gotta say that you take turns being with each of the two.

- it's not very tiring, at least you get a free ride to the underworld and the sea each time you are transported. For example, one day you go to hades, the next day you go with Poseidon. Easy.

- but, it's not always like that. They've insisted on taking you into their own place. but to make things fair, you'd be staying in a completely different home.

- actually, you know what? To make things funnier, what if you were Odin's daughter/daughter figure? You'd be staying with him instead. You have your own room in his place, away from those...bastards..or that's what he liked to call it.

- Like imagine the faces of your beloved darling's when they find you missing. Now that? That really sent them berserk. Harsher and colder than usual, and absolutely will not stop until they found you. Until they did. In Odin's place.

- Bro they all had a staring challenge I swear on my left toe. Like imagine Odin's face when he opens the door to find two gentlemen standing there pissed. And he just responds with "what can I do for you?" With a bitch face.

"I'm here to look for my wife"

"OUR wife, Brother."

"same thing."

- Odin took that personally.

- he was about to say that you weren't there, until you immediately showed up. Your presence filling the room to be more breathable and fresh. You ran over to them happily, embracing them with open arms.

- but let's just say you were pretty oblivious to the death glares they all pointed at each other, a silent warning not to touch you.

- but now let's move on to random ass headcanons I thought about.

- one time a guy called you cute and you never heard from him again. I wonder what happened..

- naughty time with these two is literal heaven. You'd be full in all holes bruv. Do not lie to me, I know what y'all are 🙄

- there would be times where they both have to combine their interests to pick out a dress for you. Believe me, your room is full of so many gifts from both the gods. Trinkets, dresses, jewelry, fancy useless stuff that you find pretty. ANYTHING.

- I can just imagine how sweet and nice they are towards you. someone else tries to talk to to them, they are as cold as the deepest depths of their realms. The moment you enter, they turn their whole personality 360 degrees from what they just displayed earlier.

- and no they will not take flirting from others lightly. A nymph approaches Poseidon? He'd be like, "I'm not interested." Hades?"I'm busy, kindly do not disturb me."

- they aren't really fond of wearing rings, but they do anyway. It's proof of their hold over you, and how they love you lots. You cook for them (or at least you try) and clean around the place.

- you were literally housewife material, maybe a mother one day. At least they hope.

- and as long as you stay, they won't inflict too much harm on anything or anyone. Unless it did smth to you. Let's not talk about it though.

- and yeah.

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dutifullylazybread · 2 days

Note

Hi! Could I ask for hcs of Zevlor being a father figure for fem!Tav?

Absolutely! I do primarily write these lists in the second person, but if any pronouns are mentioned, I'll go ahead and use ‘she/her.’

The timing for this request is a bit funny to me, because the headcanon request following this is for Zevlor in a much different context. 🤣

I have a really bad habit of using the plot of BG3 as a framework for my headcanon lists, so kind of like what I did before, I have general headcanons, and then I have a scenario driven list.

NOTE: she/her pronouns are used for Tav in this list.

Zevlor as a Father Figure for Fem!Tav

General headcanons

Zevlor was a commander who watched over plenty of young recruits. He mourned those who died and celebrated those who climbed the ranks. He acted as a mentor for many of them, but he never would have thought of himself as a father figure.

You are a bit different.

He easily falls into the habit of asking if you have eaten or if you need something to drink.

He ultimately wants to make sure that you can survive on your own, because then he feels like he has helped you in a meaningful way.

He has a hundred hidden skills, like sewing, and plenty of patience to impart that knowledge to you.

But he also thinks he is doing you a disservice if he doesn't teach you those skills.

So, yes, he's going to mend the tear in your cloak, but he's also going to make you follow along and mend a smaller tear.

Will grin ear to ear when you perfect a whip stitch.

Zevlor feels the most accomplished when he can teach you something, but he also has to fight the impulse to offer up useful information at every given opportunity.

Watch him struggle to not point out forageable mushrooms.

He will try in a very roundabout way to teach you what is forageable because he will be damned if his chil—no, this young adventurer—can't feed herself.

So the day you visit him with a perfectly dressed rabbit has him tearing up.

He doesn't expect you to be a warrior like him. He would never impose the difficulties of that life on anyone. But he does want to make sure that you can defend yourself.

If you choose to pursue the life of a warrior, he'll listen to you talk about your victories and your hardships. Should you ask for advice, he will offer it.

He isn't going to be the sort of person to give you unsolicited advice (though he will feel like he is dying if he thinks he can help you work towards a solution and you don't ask).

And, perhaps because you have sought his counsel when it comes to training as a warrior, and because he has taken an interest in not only your growth as a warrior but also the social aspects, you do find it easy to confide in him.

You might initially feel bad for venting about something, but Zevlor assures you he doesn't mind.

He soon becomes your closest confidant.

He will ask if you want advice or if you just want to talk things out. But regardless, he safeguards your secrets with the devotion one can expect of a paladin.

Zevlor isn't the sort of person to outright say “I dislike this idea” or “I dislike so-and-so,” but he does that patented mouth twist/pucker when you mention said idea/person.

“I get the sense that you don't like ___”

“Hmm. I suppose I'm not too fond of how reckless they can be. You'll have to forgive an old man for worrying.”

Also, he is absolutely, 100% the father who will say “I'm not angry, I'm just disappointed.” And if he doesn't say it, he still conveys it with the parent-patented ‘face.’

He won't lie and pretend he isn't protective of you.

If he feels that you have been wronged deeply and irreparably, it's going to take everything in him to not strike out on your behalf.

Everything.

But he also knows that he has taught you to act with a level head, and if he were to respond in a way that runs counter to what he has tried to instill in you, then what was the point?

Maybe it's because he is a Paladin of Helm, or maybe it's because he found his daughter in the last place he'd thought to look, but he wants to shield you from all harm.

He has to come to terms with the fact that he can't always protect you. And the realization nearly destroys him.

But it's in that realization that you mean so much to him that gives him pause.

And he realizes how proud he is of you, and how he wants to remain a part of your life.

Assuming that you want Zevlor to remain in your life, then he will be there for you at every single important juncture (and all of the points in between).

He's there for every heartbreak.

And he's there for every victory.

In everything but blood, he is a father to you.

He is there when you need to make home repairs, ready to offer a helping hand.

He is there at the first sign of trouble

He's there when you need to cry or be angry

And he wouldn't choose to be anywhere else

And when all is said and done, when the storms have passed and the world is quiet, he looks at you and says, “For what it's worth I'm proud of you.”

Scenario-driven Headcanons: Following Game Events - Zevlor as a Mentor and then a Father-figure

Zevlor never expected to serve as a parental figure in any capacity—least of all for an adventurer who stumbled into his path during one of the most stressful times of his life.

But something about you makes him feel paternal.

Maybe there were aspects of yourself that reminded him of when he was a newly recruited Hellrider—unsure of the world but desperate to prove himself all the same—that made him feel that he could, perhaps, act as a mentor to you.

At first, he acts as more of an advisor and a teacher. If you mention in passing that your traveling party is heading to one location or another, he’ll offer to review maps of the area with you. He has done some scouting around the Grove, so he’ll make suggestions about what to avoid and what routes were safest.

If you run any training drills, Zevlor will watch from a distance. He won’t offer feedback immediately—not unless he notices that you’re getting frustrated or that something in your technique creates a lethal opening for your foes. Otherwise, he will wait for you to ask him his thoughts.

He’s also more than content to train with you. He’s strict, but he is a patient teacher. Though he is usually reserved and level-handed with his counsel, the one thing he will never hold back on is your form while training. If he lies to you about that, then he fears that he is sentencing you to death or a serious injury.

But as time goes on, he becomes more aware of your tells—he knows when you aren’t eating or sleeping well. And though he usually wouldn’t pester someone whose health didn’t directly impact the overall safety and well being of the other tieflings, he can’t help but worry about you. He knows that you’re stressed about something (you did come to the Grove in search of a healer, after all), but he doesn’t know what that might be.

So, initially, he might broach the topic by asking if there is enough to eat on the road. He might offer to patch up your blankets or your tent if there are any notable tears.

But if those gentle questions/offers don’t get much in the way of results, he will ask you if you are taking care of yourself.

After training with you, he’ll make a point of fetching you a bowl of stew and seeing to it that you eat a few bites.

Though making sure you get rest is trickier, he will start to ask if you are sleeping enough. He feels like he is dangerously close to crossing a line, but he is worried.

He might not fall apart if you return to the Grove injured, but he won’t tolerate you not getting immediate medical attention.

After you defeat the goblins, Zevlor is practically beaming. He realizes that this is more than just relief over you being alive and the path being cleared for the refugees—he is proud of you.

He won’t claim to have played a role in your growth as a person. More than likely he’ll joke and say that he just made sure that you were holding the right end of a sword.

If you thank him for his guidance, he’ll refocus the discussion to your achievements.

He asks that you be careful on the road to Baldur’s Gate, and he’ll wish you safe travels.

So imagine how he feels when you find him trapped in the Mind Flayer colony.

Not only is he now dealing with the guilt over the Absolute invading his mind and having him urge the other tieflings to surrender, but now he sees you, the young adventurer who put their trust in him.

And that is enough to wreck him.

He wants to beg your forgiveness for not upholding this image of justice and valor, for perhaps going back on the morals that he conveyed to you whilst he mentored you.

If you respond with kindness, he will think he is undeserving. He will try to reject your forgiveness. But he won't deny the sense of pride that burns in his chest. He may have not played a role in your upbringing, but to know that he helped guide a warrior who possessed a moral compass that allowed for forgiveness? Especially for him? It makes him want to try again.

If you respond from a place of hurt/betrayal, he will accept how you feel. He won't flinch away if you berate him or yell at him. After what happened in the Shadow-Cursed Lands, how can he? He is now an Oath Breaker. He has lost everything. Perhaps he should have seen that he would fail as a mentor too.

But he wants to try again. He wants to redeem himself. It might not be possible, but he wants to strive to fill the image that you created of him in your mind. He might never attain it, but he's going to do his damnedest.

Regardless of how you respond, Zevlor implores you to take care. He doesn't care what happens to him, but the thought of you dying rattles him.

After Ketheric is defeated and everyone gathers in the throne room, Zevlor will observe from the shadows.

He doesn't make himself known to anyone. He just wanted to make sure that you were alive before he moved on.

And with the knowledge that you and your companions survived, he departs for Baldur's Gate.

He is proud of you. And he is so, so scared.

So, within Act 3, as far as I have observed/read, Zevlor doesn't reappear until the final battle (assuming you saved him in the Mind Flayer colony).

But I'm taking some liberties here.

After what happened in the Shadow-Cursed Lands, Zevlor is too ashamed to be around you.

But he is also so, so worried.

He knows you're a capable warrior. He spent weeks training you.

But suddenly that training doesn't seem like enough. Why couldn't he have urged you to stay for a few more hours that one day? He might have noticed that your swing was a bit too wide or that you left your right side vulnerable when you feinted that one time. Why the hells didn't he take the time to help you perfect your technique?

Perfection might not save you from all threats, but it gave you a better chance of survival.

Needless to say, he lays awake most nights gripped with anxiety.

Are you actually alright? Have you been injured?

He doesn't have a lot of money to his name, but he spends what he does have reading the newspaper, coveting whatever tidbits of information about you is printed that day.

He quietly celebrates your victories, and he mourns your losses from afar.

He decides one evening to toast one of your wins at the Elfsong.

And he sees you. You're laughing and joking with your friends. Despite everything that has happened. You're bruised and exhausted, but you're smiling in that moment.

He didn't intend on running into you, and he immediately makes himself scarce.

He ducks into an alleyway and lets himself cry.

That adventurer, so bright and full of potential, is now a hero.

He's scared, he's proud, and seeing you stealing a moment of joy for yourself before diving back into the fray has him simultaneously laughing and sobbing.

While he had been hesitant to make himself known to you before, he commits to standing with you at the end.

So he focuses on healing his body and honing his strength. He might renew his vows as a paladin.

But regardless, he is there when you enter the High Hall, and regardless of how you two parted in the Mind Flayer colony, he pledges his strength to you.

He might not be at your side in the final battle, but he keeps the enemy off of your back.

He fights like the Hellrider Commander he has always been.

And he watches you defeat the Netherbrain.

He isn't the first to congratulate you. No, he doesn't want to interfere in the moment that you share with your companions.

But he is there at the end, brimming with pride.

Before you leave to join your companions at the Elfsong, the two of you sit down on the edge of the jetty, looking out on the Chionthar.

The battle is over. You've won.

Zevlor might not hug you. He might not tell you that you are the child he never thought he'd have.

But he tells you how proud he is of you. And, should you be open to it, he'd like to stay in your life. Be that in the smallest of capacities, where you and he occasionally get a drink and you catch him up on your life, or in a larger capacity, where you seek him out for counsel and training, he wants to see where life will take you.

Should you be in agreement, Zevlor is a very consistent presence in your life.

At first, he is there when you call on him.

But at a certain point, he just gets a sense for when you need him there.

He never wants to barge in, but he'll make excuses to swing by and check on you.

Initially, he thought he would always be a mentor to you. And to a certain degree, he still is.

He never expected to be the shoulder you leaned on while you cried.

He never expected that you would make a point to celebrate his birthday with him.

He most certainly didn't expect you to consider his input on life-changing decisions.

But there he is, rubbing circles into your back as you weep over the loss of a companion.

There he is, confused and dewy-eyed as you push a gift into his hands and wish him a happy birthday.

There he is, watching you accomplish the impossible.

He might not have thought he'd ever be a father, let alone a father figure.

But he is more than content to fill that role for you.

#bg3 #headcanon #head canons #bg3 headcanons #bg3 head canons #baldur's gate 3 #zevlor #tav #she/her pronouns #fem!tav #bg3 fanfic #bg3 fanfiction #baldur's gate 3 fanfic #baldur's gate 3 fanfiction #zevlor headcanons #father zevlor #headcanon request

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velaenaa · 3 days

Text

under circumstances \ sosuke aizen x reader

word count: 4.6k tags: angst

“I find you intriguing, Ms. Y/N.” His slender fingers made their way towards your chin, lifting, to meet your gaze. Aizen couldn’t help himself. He wanted to conquer you. He wouldn’t be satisfied if he didn’t have you. You fascinated him. You were soft spoken, yet so blunt, so tame and yet so carefree. He wanted to dissect your brain, figure out what in the world is going on. You were the strongest woman he knew, professionally and personally. He felt the carnal desire to take you; body, mind, and soul.

You were the woman that men and women wanted, craved, and pined for. A woman who knew what she wanted. No nonsense gal. So when he had attempted to court you for the very first time you refused, stating you were better off without him. He wanted you even more. Of course very subtly, and less desperately he would try. Try and try, until you caved, becoming his.

And you did. You were his, and he was yours. You flirted, spent time with each other. Went on vacation together. Did everything together until one day;

“We are not together. Do not forget that.”

Icy tones and dull words, left you empty, but pride refrained you from pleading like some beggar. Adhering to the words, you backed away, until he pushed back to you, pulled away until he pulled you back. You knew you could break it off with this man, be with another woman, or man, or another, but you couldn’t shake him. You felt the connection between you and him that you’ve felt with no other, the pain was great, but the memories felt greater. The affection, intimacy felt greater than any hurt you’ve been caused thus far . As cliche as that sounds, you felt strongly for him. Hell, he even met your family, and you’ve met his. Under circumstances as friends, but met nonetheless.

He looked at you almost lovingly, caressing your cheeks, as you both clinked glasses. He had called you to celebrate his win on something related to his job. You knew better than to deny him a professional victory. You would've wanted the same support from him. You also knew better than to ask of what victory was he celebrating. Work was work and you two knew better than to let that mingle.

He smiles coyly, as he plays with your ring covered hand, your mind races a million miles. You were an idiot, but you were a love struck idiot. You were specifically told not to say anything about your relationship again. You couldn’t bear it though, him looking at you so enamored, it gave your heart an ache, and it tired you out, so with a puff,

“I love you and I want to be with you... Can you answer me and tell me you feel the same?”

It felt forever, he stared at you. You knew he was done. Aizen parts his hands from yours and stands up.

“No Need. It seems I've made a mistake.” You went to grab him but his hands met your wrist first. Feeling your body be pushed into the wall, a small thud, eyes widen, unbelieving he’d push you into the wall. His empty stare made your stomach hurt, anxiety rising to the top. Fingertips linger on the wall as orbs deepened stare. You go to open your mouth, ready to protest, mind going a million miles, but no words come out. Aizen stares, wordless, studying your features. A cornered prey, captured by her predator. You fought back in gaze, not going down without a fight as his hands grazed your curves, landing on your throat. His thumb brushes your lower lips, daydreaming about how they taste momentarily, before stepping backwards, he knew you two were over. You push yourself off the wall, eyebrows furrowed, quivering lips.

“We need to talk about us…Please, Sosuke..” You plead. You sounded like an injured animal, begging for your life.

“No need. I made a mistake.” He repeats coldly, like you didn’t hear it the first time.

It was as if knives plunged down your heart when he responded. You fought tears back as he stared down at you, almost in such a ‘I told you so’ manner. Your arms fall to the side, shoulders in defeat, and you shake your head at him, walking past him, purposefully not moving so your bodies collide. Your heart shatters every step you take, but as you make your way out of his apartment his fingers clasp your wrist, and without thinking you recoil your arms, swiping away from him and grabbing your purse. Thank god you were too strong for this. You weren’t going to deal with this and you certainly weren’t going to be disrespected any longer.

Grasping the card in your hand, your tears come back with full force, coming out like flood gates. A quick swipe and you fly into the apartment. You set your stuff down, taking in the air, attempting to balance out your emotions. Stepping towards the couch you let the tears flow, unable to stop it anymore. How could he say something like that?

Being in the talking stage for almost a year now, not making anything official, dragging the relationship out. Nothing was going your way, all the while you went out of your way to make him happy. He didn’t hurt you, but you gave him every bit of your heart. The time you poured into a relationship that didn’t even exist to him? When you would run to his side when he requested you. Taking PTO from your prestigious job when you were desperately needed, leading to a warning from your boss. It was no game to you, but it was a mistake to him?

You couldn’t even function properly. You felt so disrespected and upset, deleting his contact number, and everything dealing with him, pictures, voicemails. His things in your house. You cried ugly as you removed him from your life, snot and all, but it was sincerely needed. Nobody deserves your tears.

You couldn’t even contact your family, they were in another country and it was night time for them. You were contemplating calling your best friend, because one, she was dating his best friend and as much as you loved her, she told her boyfriend everything. And two, you didn’t want her around you right now, as you were in a fit of rage, not wanting to be calmed at the moment.

Once finished you ran a cold shower, even though you recoiled at the freezing temp, you needed to cool down. It had been a long day, long hours of trying to forget Sosuke Aizen. That dumb… insufferable.. Asshole. One day he's sweet and loving, the next he doesn’t even know you have feelings and disregards them. An enigma. You really wish you knew what was going through his head. You didn’t get why he acted the way he did. Why he didn’t claim you romantically. He wasn’t even seeing other women, not that you knew, so what was the purpose of not wanting to be with you?

The rush of anxiety goes through your head once again and you battle it out by looking at the showerhead, closing your eyes, and breathing slowly. Tears threatened to spill out but luckily the coldness kept it from happening. This was a nice facial for your face.. You missed his facial when he would c-..Your eyebrows furrow, and you let out a loud groan, angry you even thought of that in the first place! Finishing out the shower you step out of the shower and you peer at the counter, your phone buzzing. You ignore it and get ready for your sleep routine. Silk PJs and fluffy shoes for the win tonight, it was much needed. You pour your tea as you look at your work emails, figuring out what you were going to go back to.

The time was 10:30PM and you finished up your tea, and got in bed, looking on your phone at tiktoks. You really were ignoring him and it was proving a success.

10 missed calls.

15 missed facetime calls.

5 messages.

You were going to figure it out tomorrow morning.

The feeling of tiredness enveloped you and you closed your eyes, hoping for a better day tomorrow.

Tomorrow rolls around, and you had been up early. Your car pulls up, ready to take you to work and you order breakfast on your way there. When you said you’d figure it out tomorrow morning you really just deleted all the logs and information, you didn’t even bother to read his messages. It didn’t matter to you at that point. You were adamant on this decision and you weren’t going to turn your back on it.

You discussed plans for the week as you picked up your order for your boss and yourself. Byakuya Kuchiki was your esteemed boss and you couldn’t let him down. He was going to head into the office today, a thing he rarely did, and you wanted to make sure he wasn’t going to be unsatisfied with anything going on in the office. Not that he was going to be upset, you made sure everyone was keeping track, sales were up, training was done, and every milestones needed to be met were. You just did not want anything to pop up. This was also a good thing for you to be preoccupied. Messing around with a man your company was rivals with never really did you any good.

“I will need to talk to you about something when you get here.” His icy tone gave you some sort of comfort.

“Yes Sir.” You promptly say, as you get out of the drive through.

You gave your driver the other sandwich you ordered and headed out of the car, running into the building, since it was pouring heavy. You were greeted by the front desk and you headed towards your office, making sure to stop by a couple of managers on your way in.

Once you settled yourself a knock found itself placed on your door and you shouted at the person to walk in. As you put your glasses on you started reading emails that you may have missed and the man walking in was your secretary. You greeted him warily and he tilted his head at you, “Girl why do you look so sad.” He was a sweet boy, able to read you.Boy problems were the biggest thing the two of you bonded to, and it was great to have such a good support system.

“Oh.. you know..” You couldn’t even finish it and another person approached your office, this time you felt tense. It was Byakuya himself. Your secretary bowed and promptly took his leave. You stood up and bowed yourself, and he dismisses you. He dropped a folder on your desk. You took note of how he looked as he started speaking. His beige colored suit, no dust or crease, his hair slicked back, a bit wild towards the end, but still professional. Truly a perfect being at the pinnacle of his game.

“Y/N.” He says sternly. Your eyes shoot up at him and you blush, grinning sheepishly. “I’m so sorry. I was daydreaming.” He just blinked at you and crossed his arms, “I am aware. Did you hear a word I said?” You shook your head ‘no.’

“I’m sorry. I’ve had a horrible night. Your breakfast is right there.” You motioned towards your other desk and he grabs the food moments later after giving you a couple seconds to compose yourself. He then pulls up a chair next to you and you two get to discussing the future of the company and what he expects of you. Nothing too troublesome, but as he never comes in to the office he thought it would be good to keep you updated on what he wants to envision for the company. You were a reliable woman and he respected you greatly to keep his most busiest and most profitable sector of his company tamed. It was a wonder you could do it, as it stressed even the most level headed man alive.

As you two near the end of the discussion you sigh, and he could tell something definitely was wrong as well. You weren’t your normal cheery self. You seemed ultra focused more than normal as well. As if getting away from something.

“Something is wrong.” He simply mentions as he stopped his typing. You shook your head, and if it was anything he hated were liars.

“You’re lying. You look like you’re about to cry.” You gave up and rolled your eyes, “Boy problems sir.”

“Would you like to talk about it?” He offers and this makes you confused. This is a man who never discusses anything but work and upholding the values of the job. To casually talk to him was way too odd for you, but it felt super comforting that he seemed to care, so you took his advice and your lips part, no words coming out.

“Uh..” You wait a couple minutes to see if you were going to burst into tears but nothing came out thankfully. You did, however, feel hot.

“What would you do if a woman you’ve been chasing tells you that your ‘relationship’ was a mistake?” He tilts his head a bit caught off guard of the question.

“I would move on.” He simply stated

“Even if.. You two did everything a couple does … but he was adamant on not calling you his girlfriend?”

“He did not love you, or he is not mature enough to love you. You can’t afford to play childish games, not at this point in life.” He states again. Your face feels like lava now, fighting the urge to tear up. It hurt to hear that. It was almost a year of trying to love him and showing him that and if that were the case, he couldn’t bother loving you back.

You didn’t know how but Byakuya became part of your support system. He managed to keep it professional as well when needed. It was endearing, and you found it sweet. He’d been calling you more frequently in the last couple months and you had gotten over it at this point. You’d go out with Byakuya when he’d offer and you made it known you were still in the healing process, to which he absolutely honored. He mentioned that this was a complete platonic exchange. He couldn’t afford his most trusted confidante to not be at her A-Game.

You dressed in a short black dress, curves accentuated, black louboutins, and minimal makeup. You had curled your hair and pinned it back in a ponytail, pulling two strands on the side of your face.

Byakuya mentioned that a third would be joining the three of you at dinner as a possible prospect joining the company to help aid him in the region you work in. He wasn’t going to be here forever and was going to have to head back to his mainstay, which greatly saddened you, but it was something you knew was to happen eventually.

The waiter took you to your table to which you arrived first. He mentioned the two gentlemen that you were with will be here shortly. You nodded, thinking not much of it. You drank the wine that was graciously provided for you as a compliment.

You were enjoying the wine, taking in the atmosphere until the relaxed nature was cracked.

You saw Byakuya walking in with none other than the last man you wanted to see right now; Sosuke Aizen.

You almost broke your glass as you wrapped your fingers around the base a little too tight. You breathed through your nose. You weren’t about to piss off Byakuya, so for the sake of the company, you smiled at them. You noticed the visible shock from Aizen as he approached you two.

“Hello, It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Sosuke Aizen.” He holds out his hand towards you and you take it, faking a sweet expression, the anger rising. His warm lips meet the back of your hand and you recoil mentally.. But it felt good. You exchanged pleasantries before you sat back down. Byakuya nodded at you and the meeting dinner starts.

He mentions having Aizen as an asset to the company, ensuring the region's success along with you as the right hand man. He’d originally ask you to become the region's lead, but you’d turn it down, noting that your current position as CFO was far more enjoyable than the one he was asking you to partake in. Aizen was to take on the tasks that Byakuya usually handles, except for this region of the company. Aizen was originally in a rival company that he’d co founded but left due to wanting a different path for the company. He noted that what you and Byakuya were doing were more fit to his liking than his old partners, Kisuke & Shinji. Byakuya saw him as a valuable asset due to his skills and how well he would handle the workload, and he held a very very important role in the financial world. That was a grand asset to have in itself..

“He will take my spot as head. I hope you two get acclimated to working together. Y/N is a great asset and an exceptional member of the team. I trust you will take care of each other.”

“Of course Byakuya. You know me.” Aizen had a small smirk as he raised his glass towards the middle of the table. The three of you toast and discuss more matters of the company, communicating on what you were going to achieve by the end of the year, etc.

Once the meeting ends Byakuya was called to an emergency and was needed immediately so he leaves, entrusting you with the company of Aizen.

“Y/N.” He starts, and you roll your eyes

“I’m going to finish my wine and I will be taking my leave.” You start but you hear him chuckle, deeply, a bit alluring.

“You don’t want to talk, darling?”

“I think I made it clear when I missed your calls.” Voice covered in poison, and Aizen sighed.

“Look, I-” You really didn’t care to hear the explanation, you got your things and took a brisk leave, making sure to tip on your way out. Sosuke followed you out, and when you both made it outside on the street he grasped your wrist. You wormed your way towards the alley way before he released his grip from your hands, and you whipped out towards him, face red with anger.

“How could you?! You.. You pretend to fall in love with me for almost a year… treat me like I was the one… I respect your wish to not be together.. Even though you know what I wanted.. And then you tell me that you made a mistake? That we.. we didn’t matter?” You were in tears, he broke you down completely, you were ashamed at the display, but you were also upset, rightfully so. He silently stood there, and you couldn’t read him. “You’re such a terrible man, Sosuke Aizen, you don’t care about anyone but yourself. All you did was manipulate and hurt me. And then you think that it’s okay to just walk into my life again- especially as my new boss, not a care in the world? So of course, I don’t want to talk.”

Once again you were there cornered by him like some prey wounded in the woods. He didn’t say anything, rather he just took you in his arms and your lips met. It was a fragile kiss. Sweet and tender. Full of feelings. One you’ve never had felt before- not with Aizen. You melted into it, tears begging to continue.

It was like this for a minute until he pulled away. “Come with me.” He said rather demandingly. You complied, and he led you to his car. You hastily climb in. Cursing yourself that he still seemed to have a hold on you, even though you spent so much time getting over him. You didn’t make eye contact as his driver starts, probably towards your house. This wasn’t a new occasion for him.

“I would like to apologize. I made the mistake of letting you go. I’m not one to explain my feelings, but I truly wasn’t ready to be with you, because I was scared. It isn’t a good explanation, and you have every right to be upset with me, but I’m not very good at this.” He was good at other things; taking over the finance world, working his ass off, building an empire from the ground up, making money, but feelings? He was so far disconnected from that concept that it crushed him when he sounded so half assed with his apology.

Truth is, he had gone to therapy to figure out why he was so disregarding of his feelings and others. He had originally only sought you out for purposes of satiating his appetite for sex and intimacy, to conquer a queen befitting for him. You’d prove to show more than that, things he truly didn’t deem he deserved, love and generosity you’d lay out, and instead of trying to overpower that feeling, he succumbed to it, self destructing, uncaring of your thoughts, your feelings, desires. It was genuine, you’d never seen this side of him. This expression was like a child apologizing for the first time. It made you melt. It made you sad. Heart flaring. You weren’t stupid. But you weren’t heartless.

Arms envelop his tousled head, as he gets pulled into his ladies chest. You gently breathed through your nose, silent, lips pursed tight to prevent any emotions from streaming out uncontrollably. You held him as he snaked his arms around you. You knew how hard it must have been for this man to tell you how he felt, albeit a bit hollow, you figure he has more to work on, but this was a start. You were a bit proud, a bit happy, a bit upset, a bit of everything.

“Sosuke..” You were the one to break the silence, grasping for answers. You suddenly felt an overwhelming tiredness overcome you and you lay your head on his shoulder, eyes closing. This entire situation had you exhausted and your body gave out, and you weren’t gonna fight it. Your eyelids felt so heavy as you succumbed to sleep, that you completely ignored the rest of the conversation. Aizen must’ve felt you slipping away, as he cradled you in his arms. He was a bit confused as to why you suddenly fell asleep, but he paid no mind to the technicalities and just rolled with it. Hopefully you could let him slide with fishing through your purse for your apartment card.

You woke up suddenly to the clank of dishes hitting each other. Panicking, you attempt to grab your phone that you normally place on your nightstand, only for it to not be there. Looking down, you were wearing your silk pajamas in your bed, you also smelled a faint trace of tea in the air. That meant Sosuke was in the kitchen. You slipped out of bed and trudged your way over to the kitchen, seeing the man in all his glory. His hair looked a bit messy, his suit jacket off- only dress shirt and his khakis, which made him look delectable. He was busy looking at the tea as he didn’t sense your presence from behind.

Delicate fingers wrap around his waist as he's caught by surprise. Aizen eases into the unnerving hug and after you pull away he turns toward you, lifting your chin and kissing you. You could get used to this. This was what you wanted, what you needed, this was the life, the relationship that you so desperately wanted for him and for you, for ‘us’. He was doing this right now, just like how he was doing it the last time, you still couldn’t wrap your head around it. You furrow your brows mid kiss, trying not to ruin the moment, and it works, for now.

“Darling..” You open your eyes, and his gaze was soft, no intensity whatsoever. Who in the world abducted Sosuke Aizen? He’s never had his guard down like this. “Sosuke..” He goes to smile, but you needed to lay down the law first, “We have to talk. About us, about everything, and what we’re supposed to do.” His attempted smile drops, and he nods, a little hesitant, but he agrees. He pours you and himself a cup of tea before you two sit on the living room couch, situating yourselves and getting comfortable.

“Did you hear the part in the car?” You gave him a nod. This signaled him to continue, “I went to therapy when we ended things. I was able to unpack a lot of trauma, and figure out what I should be working on.. It’s a process, and I'm still going, but it’s going to take a while.” He looked visibly uncomfortable doing this, but he needed to do so, or else he’d never have the courage; “I love you.” Your heart skips a beat, your body feeling warm all of the sudden, “I always have. I just.. I wasn’t in the right mindset to say it back then. I may not even be in the right mindset now, but you were right. I should say it, even if things are difficult.” The cold callous Sosuke Aizen you knew wasn’t here today in front of you, this newfound sweetness, almost porcelain like feel, a loving aura. You felt happy, you never thought he’d say these things. It was like a dream.

“What do you wanna do, from here on out?” He asks, never taking his eyes off of you. You thought for a brief moment, would you be willing to undo and erase all the wrong doings? Do you want to deal with the hardships again? Of course you were, who were you kidding; you were utterly in love with this man.

“I.. I want to be with you.. As a couple, boyfriend and girlfriend, label and all. I want to do it right.”

“I would like nothing else.”

“I love you too.”

This felt like a huge huge load off your shoulders. It was so intensely quiet thereafter, and you two just stared at each other, before it dawned on you, “What about work?”

“I don’t care if you don’t.” As if your heart couldn’t get any bigger.

A couple of months go by, and business was back to usual, you were back to your normal self, and Sosuke was back to his broody mean self, but with you he was gentle, and lovely. You just wanted him to care for you, and he was doing just that. From the top; flirting, spending a lot of time together, and hell since you two work together you two go to lunch everyday. Dates have resumed, all is well. Byakuya even spoke with you about the relationship, and that he was counting on you to make sure it did not affect the workplace. Assurance done, or he had free reign to fire you.

Sosuke was getting adjusted to the lifestyle, it was new to be so poetic with his love, but he's doing better than he credits himself, and you made sure to tell him that.

Authors Note: Hello ^_^ Thank you for reading, this is my first piece here. I don’t tend to have it proofread, so there may or may not be any issues. English is my 2nd language so apologies for any incorrectness. I hope you enjoyed it!

#aizen sosuke #aizen sosuke x reader #aizen sousuke #sousuke aizen #aizen #bleach x reader #bleach x y/n #bleach x female reader #bleach x you #sosuke aizen #sōsuke aizen #aizen sōsuke

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jeeaark · 6 months

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could make for one very strange and very odd tasting triple-date night (feat. Squid buddy, and the poor bachelor squad in camp)...good luck greygold XD

Sorry for the late reply regarding the silly Piña Colada Plan, anon!

Also don't. Don't take this one seriously like at all- I just. really wanted to make that pun. Can't resist a silly knight pun.

#I could not for the life of me figure out how to respond to this #Without just like- simply agreeing with you - an amusing concept to imagine to be sure!#THANKFULLY (or unfortunately) the pun gods threw a bone at my two sole surviving brain cells #But thank you anon! Greygold will take any and all luck that they can get 8'D

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spocks-kaathyra · 5 months

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#vent #wow I will never be able to let myself have friends huh #I am unwanted and inherently unwantable #I have it all figured out I just can't DO anything right. why is breaking silence the hardest thing to do #I can't bring myself to make/maintain/deepen friendships bc I'm convinced that I'm unpleasant to be around and unpleasant to be friends with #my company is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy #<- completely unjustified belief. I am kind and friendly and capable of responding appropriately in the majority of social situations #they reach out and I shrink back every time. no matter how much they reach towards me I can't believe that they actually want me around #and ofc the reasonable thing for them to do is stop reaching! when I never reach back! why would they expect a different outcome this time #so I can't blame anyone. I can't sit around waiting for a saintly mindreader who can see that my actions contradict my feelings #I know I just need to reach out. but how could I do that when I'm convinced it'll only hurt them?#my presence makes their day worse. I'm a mangy dog begging for scraps I don't deserve at their table. I am harming them with my presence #how can I beg for their attention and company and time when I know their life would be better without me in it #<- false belief. when I reach out I make them feel wanted and they feel more comfortable reaching out to me when they know I like them.#everyone appreciates being reached out to. I am pleasant to be around. they like being liked by me. my company is a desirable thing #company in general is a desirable thing. my company is better than no company. people like being liked.#logically I know all this to be true. emotionally? they hate me and I deserve it and the more I show I like them the more they'll hate me #sigh. what a banal problem to have. I'll stop being 18 years old one day. I can't wait until I have better things to worry about #replies appreciated. btw. in the interest of asking for what I want instead of expecting ppl to read my mind lmao #narcissus's echoes

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compacflt · 11 months

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wow very cool. as a european i am learning a lot about the us navy and defense and everything from your blog haha! idk if you've answered this before but what made you wanna work in defense?

Russia invading ukraine on my birthday lol. though i was always interested in military history/military fiction even as a kid. that was just the watershed moment for me personally

i don’t want to work IN defense though. I want to write ABOUT defense. still not sure what that looks like exactly for me. move to DC definitely. maybe get a position at one of the twenty trillion trade publications there are around here. Or comms job, govt job, journalism job… not sure. hopefully i will figure it out ! would love to write fiction for a living but im realistic enough to know that’s an oxymoron

(Also, side note, i am very flattered, & i know i say this somewhat often but i feel the need to repeat it every once in a while… please don’t take anything i say on this blog / ESPECIALLY in my writing as fact. i misrepresent stuff and get stuff wrong all the time, sometimes on purpose for story reasons. I try my best but i simply lack experience & worldview and have spent functionally zero time being an Adult or having to deal with Adult topics [still do not know what a 401k is!]. for instance if you even mention the words “security clearance” or “congressional confirmation hearing” in the general vicinity of my fics, the plot, nay, the entire CONCEPT, goes up in flames, as i discuss in this post. i really appreciate this comment don’t get me wrong But there are definitely better/more accurate places to learn about these topics than a 20y.o. A&D intern who is only just beginning their career & is still confused about many of the basics of real life. I have a lot of growing up still left to do & you really don’t have to listen to me)

#saying this only bc I myself am trying to learn from those better sources #the whole concept of ‘Guy who is closeted even from himself’ doesn’t work when a core part of his job is specifically being asked #‘if an enemy government discovered your secret gay lover & threatened to expose it would you betray the US to keep it secret’#no idea what ice as i have written him would respond tbh #and just that alone is enough to deny his clearance LOL he’s cooked #anyway—ugh don’t get me started on how conflicted i am about my career #as of posting this i have finished my first aerospace & defense internship/job #would do it again #freaking out about what that means for my own personal politics #w/e i have 2 years left of college. not gonna worry about this now.#I have a lot of growing up still left to do.#thanks for the ask anon i think i know who you are. <3 love you.#i could talk about my experience with the nyc ukrainian community for a week straight tbh #getting involved with them was genuinely life-altering stuff #compacflt has finally figured out how to internally link to previous posts on mobile: hallelujah

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innalheid · 11 months

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I have been having such a high dilemma the past several hours I am so lost

#high dilemma as in like. a dilemma that only really happens when youre high #i cannot for the life of me figure out how the tone of this text is supposed to be received #and i cannot figure out how to respond #in like. a very distinctly ''if i were sober i would beable to logically figure out what this means bc of how i know the person''#but i don't have that cognitive ability rn so im like. do i say hey im high as hell is this flirty or are you being a dick?#because what if he was being a dick. where the hell do i go from there #but i feel like itd be insane of me to just like move on and ignore the comment #esp since im starting the conversation back up again after several hours #so like #its obvious i left him on read. for this text. and then decided weeehhh but i wanna talk to you ToT #but it could have also maybe been a reasonable conversation ender sentence?????? im so confused #and im about to get some sleep anyway so like #hwargh

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lymtw · 23 days

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Toji invites you over with a simple text of:

You busy tonight, doll?

To which you respond:

I don't think so... Not that I know of. Why?

Toji laughs through his nose when he reads your message. Even the way you text him has your timidness imbued into it. It's precious.

Come spend the night at my place. You told me you're off tomorrow, right?

I am, but are you sure? Driving home is not a problem for me. I can hang out and go home after.

You're staying. I wanna try something with you and it requires you to stay the night. You can't go home.

Oh okay! I'll be there in 10.

Drive safe.

Toji likes that you're very precise about the time you'll be arriving somewhere, and if you're ever late when it comes to spending time with him, you apologize profusely, nonstop. You won't stop blubbering about why you're late and how sorry you are for making him wait, even after Toji's expressed that he's more than understanding. He's the king of showing up late to plans, so he can't be a hypocrite and scold you when you don't do it often at all.

You're so sorry, though, and you don't shut up about it until he makes you shut up with a kiss. You're helpless, and you can't for the life of you figure out where to put your hands when you're so focused on the grip he had on your waist to pull you up against him.

He releases your lips, cracking a grin at the look of wonder on your face. He can't deny the pride that swells in his chest at his ability to disarm you and prevent you from having a total meltdown over a three minute delay.

Toji has gotten so much better at handling situations like these with you. It's only fair for him to gain satisfaction out of making you feel better. After all, you are a first for him. You're emotionally fragile, you're a nervous wreck, and your voice competes with the wind just to be heard. Toji doesn't set aside the fact that you're also beautiful, warmhearted, and you try for him. He sees your attempts to be affectionate. You'll slowly reach your hand out to hold his and then bail the second he catches you. He ends up having to interlock his fingers with yours because your embarrassment doesn't allow you to try again. He still appreciates that you leave your comfort zone for him and allow him to guide you towards new experiences.

"Stop with the guilty feelings, ma. We have all night and all day tomorrow. What's a couple minutes to ensure you get to me in one piece?" He says, comforting your droopy self. You look like a sad, abandoned puppy, now sporting rosy cheeks from his surprising gesture.

"Okay," you say, feeling a little more at ease. "What did you have in mind for tonight?"

"Follow me," he says, leading you through his living room to his kitchen. He pulls out a stool for you and points at it. "Sit." You want to laugh at the way he says it like he's teaching commands to a dog, but you know he doesn't mean it that way, so you obediently sit down like one anyway.

"Have you eaten anything?" He asks, silently hoping you have because he doesn't have anything to make you dinner. He would have to order in or pick something up.

"I ate a couple hours ago. Still pretty full," you respond, watching him reach up for something in his cabinets. There's now a tall glass bottle with a red label and matching cap sitting on the counter.

"How 'bout it?" He says, a large hand wrapped around the neck of the bottle. "We could go to the couch and watch a movie or something."

He's never seen you under the influence of anything, but based on your reaction, maybe he'll get a show tonight. He's always wanted to know what you would be like if you were more extroverted and outspoken. There's nothing wrong with the way you are, but if things keep going the way they're going between you and Toji, he's bound to meet your chatty alter ego at some point in the future. What better way to have this experience than in a secure place with someone who can handle their alcohol and take care of you if it turns out that you can't.

"Okay, sure." You giggle, excitedly.

You're a lightweight. Even the fruitiest, sweetest alcoholic beverage will quickly take a toll on you while you're sipping on it. Wine is a step up, so you'll have to try your best to keep it together for the sake of not looking sloppy in front of Toji.

Toji brings down two glasses, and pours out the deep red liquid into them. One for you, one for him. He hands the glass to you, and nods at your quiet "thank you".

Toji watches as you immediately take a sip. He sees the way your nose scrunches at what you consider to be a funny taste, but the second you put the glass down, you smile like nothing. You don't like it at all. You hate the bitterness, and the fact that it's made with fermented grapes lives in the back of your head.

"How is it?" He asks, holding back a chuckle. You're too sweet for your own good, pretending to enjoy this for him.

"I like it," you say, pressing your lips together.

"Yeah? I think it's kinda gross. Guess I was expecting more from a fancy ass bottle, but brands are gonna brand, huh?"

You giggle, almost involuntarily. You're one gulp in, and already you're starting to feel the effects.

One of your worst habits includes chugging drinks that don't taste good, just so you can get them over with. You even do this when your drink is messed up at coffee shop. You're too nice to ask the barista to remake it, so you suck it up and drink the incorrect beverage solely for the caffeine you hope it has in it. This time is no different. You hate the taste of alcohol. You don't do plain shots, you can't stand hard ciders, and wine is no exception, but you're doing this for Toji. He cracked open the bottle to share with you, so you're going to drink every ounce of the liquid in the glass, whether you like the taste or not.

You bring the glass to your lips again, taking a much larger sip. The glass is a little less than halfway now, and your eyelids are starting to feel a little heavy. Not in a sleepy manner, but you can't seem to hold your eyes open as wide anymore.

You exhale through your nose, shut your eyes, and then blink them back open to take note of your altered state.

"That was a lot. How are you feeling?" Toji asks, noticing a shift in your demeanor. You seem a little more sluggish now. You turn your attention to him, your eyes rolling when they turn to meet his.

"I'm good, how are you?" You ask, like it was the start of a conversation rather than an ongoing one. Your eyes almost shut completely when you smile at him.

"You're tipsy already, aren't you?" He asks, with a grin on his face.

"Pshh, what? No, i'm not," you say, contradicting yourself with a giggle. "Answer the question, baby. How are you?"

"Fine," he responds, lingering on the pet name. You've got loose lips, now. In any other circumstance, you would address him by his name. Most of the time Toji is the one giving you pet names, for the sake of flustering you. He loves the way you look at him when he calls you doll or sweetheart, somewhat shocked every time the words leave his mouth.

"Yeah? That's good." You pick up the glass one more time, sighing before you mutter, "'scuse me. Gotta finish this."

With that last sip, the glass was now empty. Even Toji thinks you drank that too fast, but he still has the courtesy to ask you if you want more.

"Mhm, I'll have a little bit more. Just a tiny bit." Toji pours as much as he did the first time, chuckling when you nod in approval of the quantity. "That's perfect. Absolutely, perfect. You're a genius, my love." You flash him a smile before starting on the next glass.

Toji was considering having another glass, but that was before you called him "my love" in a tone so warm that he felt like he just had a bowl of hot soup that was now settling in his stomach. That was before you smiled at him in such a free spirited manner. It was too late for him to see you in this state while completely sober, but he sure as hell wouldn't be adding anymore alcohol to his system. He can't miss something like this, so instead he leans forward on the counter, and intently watches your every move.

"I got something on my face?" You ask, dragging your sleeves all over your face. You examine your sleeves and they're clean. "You liar. You're looking at me like that for nothing." You squint at him, a slight scrunch in your nose to define your defensiveness.

Toji laughs, his focus now on the small pinch in your brows. "Don't go picking fights over nothing. It's not a crime to look at my pretty baby."

Your faux tough exterior immediately crumbles, the irked expression on your face dropping to the ground, at the sugary words he uses on you. Your face feels very warm, and now there's an indefinite blush on it. You can't stop smiling at the look on Toji's face. He's so focused that he's gone speechless, and you eventually break into a laughing fit because of it.

"Hey... i'm usually the quiet one. Why aren't you talking, pretty boy? Need me to shut up?"

The pet name has Toji glancing at your glass, noticing that it was full for less than five minutes. This was new— you being flirtatious towards him. He didn't have any complaints about it whatsoever.

Once again, the quantity of the wine in your glass was below the halfway mark. "Nah, baby. Talk to me. You must really like the wine, huh?"

"Mmm..." you lean forward towards him, with your elbow on the counter and your chin in your palm. "What makes you say that?"

He actually snickers this time, earning a sly grin from you. "You're chugging it like it's water. It's either you love it or it tastes like ass and you're dying to spit it out."

You pick up the glass again, one last time. "Let's find out if I like it," you say as if you're not on your second serving. You let the liquid hit your tongue, and you are instantly repulsed by the flavor. The glass is tilted all the way up, signaling that you've finished two cups of wine in less than fifteen minutes. Your cheeks are filled with the drink, blown up like a puffer fish, which makes Toji smile softly with anticipation for your reaction. Your tongue stays on the roof of your mouth, keeping the wine in your cheeks separate, to give you a break for a few seconds. You release the bubbles of your cheeks and your mouth is flooded with the bittersweet liquid. You swallow the burgundy mouthful and smile with your lips pressed together once it's all gone. The mouth drying effect of wine is your least favorite thing about it.

"So?" Toji prompts.

"It's-" you gag, clasping a hand over your mouth with wide, slightly teary eyes.

Toji's chest and shoulders shake as he contains his laughter, his lips pressed together tightly to stifle the smile threatening to show itself, but his eyes tell you everything.

"Wooo, sorry about that," you say, chuckling through the embarrassment. "It's good," you repeat, still muffled by your palm.

"Yeah? Want more?" Toji asks, holding up the bottle with a teasing grin on his face.

You almost gag again but manage to control yourself. "No, thank you. Any more and I'll doze off, and we both know that's not what i'm here for." There was a hint of sultriness in your tone, something Toji was not sufficiently familiar with. It was a completely welcome shift from your normally tentative way of speaking to him.

"I know why you're here, but I wanna know what you think you're here for."

You stand from your stool and lean more of your body onto the counter. Your hand reaches for his, and for the first time, you don't pull back before making contact with his skin. "To love on you, of course," you say, with those pretty rosy cheeks. Your eyes remained glossy and your nose was still red from trying not to bring the wine back up earlier, but Toji thought you looked so cute.

"Is that right?" His thumb brushes over your knuckles, feeling the softness against his rough fingertip.

"Let's go watch that movie you were talking about and you'll see what I mean."

Toji was loving this. Your confidence, your lack of holding back anything you had to say, it was truly baffling how you could be someone else entirely with just a couple glasses of wine.

You keep his hand in yours, and as if it were your house, you say, "come on," and drag him along to the living room.

This time you say "sit" and point at the couch. This time he's the obedient dog and does as you say, sitting on the exact cushion you were pointing at with a smirk on his face. He moves the couch pillow aside to make room for you, but you had another seat in mind. You take two steps towards him before slowly dropping yourself into his lap, straddling him.

"I see you're finally taking your seat on the throne, hm?" He grins, resting his hands on your waist. This is the closest Toji's been allowed to watch you giggle without you burying your face into his neck and it's a trip. He can see the details of the creases around your eyes and the lift in your cheeks as you smile. He feels fuzzy, and he didn't even finish his glass of wine, so he knows it's not that.

"Stop making me laugh and pick a movie, will you? I'm here for that, too."

He picks up the remote for the TV and turns it on. "How are you gonna watch the movie while facing me?"

"Actually,.. can I tell you a secret, baby?" You ask, wrapping your arms around his neck. Your fingers play with the hair that reaches towards the nape of his neck, combing through it gently.

"What's that, princess?" Toji asks, vert eyes flitting between your eyes and that sweet smile of yours.

"I don't wanna watch a movie. I... wanna look at you... and that's it." Your nails gently scratch the back of his head, eliciting a tingly sensation that makes chills run down his spine.

"That's cool, too," Toji says, turning the TV off again, not caring that it was on for less than a minute before you changed your mind. He sighs, adjusting his position beneath you. Your thighs are secured around his hips, your knees touching the backrest of the couch.

"You're so handsome, my baby. God, look at those eyes," you whisper in awe, before giggling and bringing your hands to his face. You trace the bags under his eyes with your thumbs while admiring the haunting shade of green that scopes on you. Toji's hand comes up to loosely wrap around your wrist. He's not there to stop you, he just wants to move along with you as you observe his face.

"I know I don't say this to you enough, but I find you..." you sigh, blinking slowly, "enchanting..." You lean in and kiss the left corner of his lips—his right, and feel the smooth, tattered skin beneath your warm lips. "and I love you," you mumble into the cicatrix. "So fucking much, baby. And i'm sorry that you'll never know exactly how much because you aren't me." You're looking at him with so much adoration and touching him with a delicacy that can't be put into words. It's a deadly combination, one that has Toji in a chokehold and forces him to soften up even more for you.

He tightens the hold he has on your waist, pulling you closer until your stomach is pressed to his, as a result. You being so affectionate towards him is making him feel really good, and you have no idea because you're too focused on appreciating him. He's subconsciously leaning into your touch, his softened gaze meeting your lovestruck one.

"Fuck. I love you, too, princess," he murmurs, squeezing your wrist in his hand. He pulls your hand down to his chest. "Want you to aim for my lips, this time."

"Okay," you say, smiling before closing the distance between your lips and Toji's. He can still taste the remnants of the wine you inhaled minutes ago, but it tastes much better and a lot sweeter on you. Toji can hear your high pitched little hums as you kiss him, happiness pouring into your kisses. You're trying so hard not to laugh in his face, and trying is the best you can do, right now. You never were good at hiding your smile from Toji. He can't see it, but he can feel the way your lips widen, and he's occasionally kissing your teeth when your sluggishness keeps you from matching his pace. With little pants leaving you, you drag your lips away.

He sighs, frustrated by the loss of your softness against him. "Baby..." he groans, the sound almost whine-like to your ears. He wants more, so much more of you, and you're ignoring him. You're too busy kissing his chin, and his cheeks, and the tip of his nose.

You drag your other hand down to his chest and keep your hands splayed out on it as you let your lips trail his jaw, lightly sucking on the skin. Toji can't help but think about how this version of you will be gone in the morning. You won't be as outwardly affectionate, you'll go back to second guessing every move you make with him and shrinking every time he steals kisses from you, instead of confidently kissing him back like you did a minute ago.

You make your way down his neck, pressing kiss after kiss on him before you move towards his ear. "I love you, Toji," you whisper, kissing the shell of his ear after. "Love you, love you, love you soooo much," you barrage, before throwing him off with a bite to his earlobe. You giggle like a menace into his ear, the warmth of your breath luring goosebumps out onto his skin.

He chuckles, repeatedly squeezing the soft skin of your waist between his hands. "Yeah? Tell me again," he murmurs snaking his hands beneath the back of your shirt. Your skin is very warm, and there's nothing to blame but Toji and that shitty wine for making your body react this way.

With uninterrupted hands, you course your fingers through his hair and lean in to bite him again, this time on his neck. Toji chuckles at how you instantly rush to soothe him with your tongue and a warm kiss, even when you inflicted zero pain on him.

"I love you, Toji," you repeat into the wet indentations you left behind. "My love... my handsome man... I cherish you, you know?"

Toji is practically purring at all the affection you're showering him with. The slurring of your words is blocked out and they remain clear as day to him. He manages to hum a deep little "mhm" to your last statement.

"It's just so hard to talk to you sometimes. You... you're so intimidating, sometimes. I don't expect you to understand..." you divert your gaze to his shoulder, not able to look him in the eyes as vulnerability takes sudden control of your emotions. "It seems like I don't appreciate you sometimes—all the time, but I do, Toji. I do appreciate you, and I can't ever say I love you enough to show it. Words aren't always enough."

Toji catches the waver in your voice and his eyes dart to yours. You're tearing up, and you're trying to still your quivering lips by pressing them together.

"Shit," Toji mutters under his breath. You have the saddest expression he's ever seen and it's messing with his heart. He pulls his hands out of your shirt so that he can swiftly pull you into his warm embrace. "Hey," he coos. You're shaking against him, holding your breath to avoid sobbing. Your lungs burn, but you'd rather feel that than make a scene of your tears. "Don't be sad, mama. What's with the tears, hm?" he murmurs. He can feel your tears dampening his shoulder, but the fact that you haven't made a sound is concerning. "Breathe or you'll die," he says, only half joking. He rubs a soothing palm against your back, his other arm around your waist.

You let out what sounds like a mixture between a choked laugh and a sob, slowly but surely regulating your breathing. You don't even feel like saying anything anymore because you know your voice will give way to even more pity.

"You're more than enough for me," Toji says, his chin resting on your head. "I know how you feel, you know how I feel. We're complete." He can feel the way you scrunch his shirt up into your fists. As if he would go anywhere without you. "I get you and you're stuck with me. Got it?" You silently nod against his shoulder in response. "Sit up and let me look at you."

You really don't want him to see you this way. Your eyes feel swollen and you don't feel presentable.

"I can't..." you say, barely audible. You release his shirt and let your hands go limp behind him.

"Why not?"

"I'm not pretty right now. Don't look at me."

"I'm gonna look at you," he challenges with a teasing grin.

"Toji, don't look at me."

"Too late, it's happening. Plan's already in motion," he says, sliding his arms onto your shoulders.

"Toji, don't-" He effortlessly pushes you off his shoulder and gives you a once over. You look defeated and you're unable to look him in the eyes, but at least he can see you now.

"Don't know what you were so worried about. You look the same but more blush-y." You finally give him your slightly reddened eyes, a soft smile appearing on your face. You look like your sober self. "Yeah, you look the same."

"Are you lying?" You ask, still not regaining the full strength of your voice yet.

"I wouldn't tell you if I was, but no, i'm not lying. You're so pretty." Toji wiped away tears that were stuck beneath your eyes, and you giggled. He washed away your sadness within a couple minutes. Toji always did this for you in exchange for your love and affection. He lifted your spirits when you didn't feel deserving of him, and with time, he got much better at recognizing the signs that came with this ridiculous idea you planted in your head.

"You're done loving on me? Already?" He asks in playful disbelief.

"You're not done with me? Do you actually want more?" You ask, hesitantly.

"Don't want more, I need more," he corrects, returning his hands to their rightful place on your waist. "Get all up on me, princess."

You giggle, leaning closer towards him to peck a kiss onto his cheek.

"Mhm, like that," he says, contently, when you pick up the pace and start smothering him. "Yeah, baby, there you go." His forearms go beneath your shirt, encircling around your bare waist and pulling you close to him like before. "Who's getting spoiled like me?" He says through a grin. You're holding back laughs as he continues to praise you for your affection.

"S-Stop," you say through a wheeze, not able to contain the sound any longer when you looked at him.

"What are you laughing at, huh?" He chases you this time, pressing his nose into your cheek before planting a light kiss into your jaw.

"You're so unserious," you say, turning your head as he keeps going with the kisses.

"Mmm... I'm serious about you," he says, feeling the vibration of your laughter against his grin. "So serious."

Your cheeks feel incredibly hot from how much you've been smiling. In this little drunken haze, things are so good. You're so happy, you're so affectionate, and you talk so much. This isn't like you at all, but it's not hurting anyone, especially not Toji. There was one minor slip, but you moved past it so quickly like the words never left your head to begin with. You're just so simple... so easy to take care of.

Toji notices the way your eyes are starting to lid with tiredness, and while he would love for you to doze off in his arms right then and there, you'd probably prefer waking up in a bed.

"Let's go to bed, yeah?" He suggests.

"What? No! I just got here... We can still talk, and kiss and- I'm not even tired."

Toji grins at the way you fight him on this, and he has half a mind to indulge you when you look so adorable, but he has to stand his ground. He's right.

"But, you are. You can't even hold your eyes open, anymore."

You feel sad again because the rest of the night would be going to waste if you both go to sleep early. You're there to spend time with Toji, and yet you feel like it's your fault your time is being cut short. You're thinking you shouldn't have drank the wine so quickly, if at all.

"Listen, doll," Toji says. He doesn't like the sadness that resurfaces on your pretty face. He doesn't think you should look that way because of him. "We're just gonna go lay in bed. We don't have to go to sleep. We can stay up as long as you want. Light on or light off, whatever you wanna do, let's just move it to the room."

You sigh, still not completely convinced that the night isn't over, but Toji managed to persuade you. "Will you carry me, please? My legs feel like jelly."

"Of course. What kind of person would I be if I let you stumble into the room on your own?"

You sigh, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist, your face buried into the crook of his neck. "You'd still be my favorite person, but i'd be a little upset..."

Toji stands from the couch, humming in response to your quiet mumbles.

"...but not really upset. Just a little bummed. Not for too long, though, 'cause I love you, but I would expect an apology from you if I fell down," you draw out.

Toji cracks at your little ramblings. It's a ten second walk from the couch to the bedroom, and the whole time you were working through a hypothetical conflict.

"Yeah? You'd want me to say sorry?" He asks, setting you down on the bed.

"Mhm, and then I wouldn't be upset or bummed anymore," you mutter to yourself as you roll onto your back.

"That's fair. Want the light on or off?"

"Off," you blurt. "Let's tell scary stories," you trill, enthusiastically. You pull the blanket over your lower body until it reaches just below your chest.

Toji makes his way to the bed after turning off the light. He takes his shirt off, and out of habit lets it fall to the floor. "We're not telling scary stories this late at night," he says, joining you beneath the blanket.

"But, they're funny," you say, turning to face him. "I don't get scared, either."

"Depends on who's telling the story. I'm sure as hell not gonna feed you a nightmare, doll."

"Boo," you say, lowly. "Whatever, i'm over it already," you mutter, rolling your eyes.

Toji watches you grow more and more tired as you throw random, nonsensical topics at him. You're taking longer to respond by the minute, and you're dozing off while humming in thought. You shake awake each time it happens and try to keep the conversation going, but Toji just shushes you and tells you to go back to sleep.

"I can see the moon through the window," you mumble, looking past him.

"I know, shh..." he hushes you, again.

"There's only like... one star," you whisper, in awe.

"Baby, come here," Toji says, like he's about to lecture you about the rules of sleep, but really he's just thinking that if his body heat doesn't put you down, he's gonna have to stay up with you until you fall asleep on your own.

You scoot closer towards Toji, tucking your arms into your chest when he reaches out to pull you into him the rest of the way. His body exudes so much warmth, you feel like you don't need the blanket at all.

There was nothing left for you to say when you couldn't see or feel anything but him. It was as if you were gone the second he enveloped you in his arms. You were small to the brink of nonexistence, no longer there to tell him what your surroundings were, or to ask him thoughtless, silly questions. You were no longer there to fight off the sleep he only seemed to bring closer towards you. Feeling his warm skin against you made you change your mind about this invisible fiend that was pulling your eyelids down. You now welcomed the calls to rest from your steady heartbeats.

Your silence gave him the answer he needed, but for good measure, he poked at you with a whisper of, "Ma?" and waited a few seconds for your response. Nothing. He sighed and coiled around you tighter. Thoughts of the night ran through his head. Your soft, yet, occasionally bruising kisses and the imprints of your teeth on his skin, your unapologetic laughter, your certainty in using the pet names that claimed him as yours. He was weak for the amount of times you openly told him you loved him. It was a psychedelic dream, to say the least. One he hoped would continue once he followed you into slumber.

You woke up hours later, completely smothered by your bear of a man. All you could do was stare up at the ceiling, while you waited for Toji to wake up because he was literally breathing down your neck. His arm rested over your chest, his legs were tangled with yours, and his face was right beside your face. You weren't feeling the effects of the wine anymore, and luckily, you didn't have a headache or any signs of a hangover. You were back, which meant...

"What are you staring at?" A deep, raspy voice jolts you out of your thoughts.

You look at the handsome face next to you, and as if your heart can hear and see, it wakes up. "Nothing. Just woke up," you lie.

"Mm... you were staring hard at the roof. I thought it came to life or something," Toji chuckles. You smile, briefly, before looking at the ceiling again.

Toji releases you and flips onto his back, wanting to know what's so fascinating about the space you're looking at. "What are you thinking?" He asks, when he discovers nothing but blank space.

You take your time, not wanting to stumble over your words. Your heart skips a beat when he turns his head to look at you. In the time it takes for you to respond, you both could have gone back to sleep again.

"A penny for your thoughts?" he finally says, following the idiom with a question. "Did I even use that correctly?"

You can't help but laugh, nodding your head to answer his question. "I'm thinking about last night. Sorry if I said anything stupid."

Toji turns his body towards you again, thinking the only thing that's stupid is that he's still staring at the roof instead of staring at you. "You didn't. You were calm, from what I got to see, at least."

"So... boring."

"Not boring," he instantly catches. "You were perfect. You didn't have me running around chasing you, you weren't a brat—it couldn't have gone better, ma." He purposely missed something in his less than brief recount of the night to you. He can think back to the emotions that seeped through your little daze, and your insecurity about outwardly showing him love, all he wants, but there's no way in hell he's bringing that up to you, now. "You ramble a lot," he adds, a soft smile emerging on his face.

You can feel your cheeks warming up. "Oh god," you groan in embarrassment. "That's not- Sorry, that sounds... not so fun. Annoying of me, actually."

"Stop, it was cute," he assures, adding more fury to the blush creeping on your face. "Then you wouldn't go to sleep 'cause you kept seeing stuff outside the window."

You wanted to drown yourself in the blanket. Shame and embarrassment were winning their battle against you, as always.

"That was also cute," he says, watching the way your lips twitch as you bite back a smile. "You know my favorite part, though?" He says, grinning as he leans towards your ear.

"N-No, what?" You ask, trying so hard not to giggle.

"When you kissed me and told me you loved me," he murmurs into your ear like it's a dirty secret.

You snicker, the short sound of amusement evolving into laughter within seconds. You throw the blanket over your face and partially over Toji's face. The sight of your veiled body shaking with laughter lured out a couple chuckles of his own.

"That's funny?" He asks, pulling the blanket down, allowing you to see the sly grin he's sporting.

"A little bit," you respond, smiling— a remainder of your laughter.

"Silly girl. Come here," he says, dragging you back into his arms. There's no reason you should be awake at six in the morning on your day off. "Let's go back to sleep," he murmurs into the crown of your head. "We can go out for breakfast, later."

"Okay," you mumble, eyes shut already as you embrace the natural warmth of his body.

"One more thing," he murmurs. You don't raise your gaze, but your ears are open and you're listening closely. "Tell me you love me."

You didn't expect that, but you weren't going to deny him of such a simple thing. The words were easy to recite because you meant them with every fiber of your being. "I love you, Toji," you comply, immediately.

He sighs, contently, almost like hearing those words revitalized him. "Love you, too, mama."

That went out to every version of you.

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inkskinned · 1 year

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so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.

first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.

it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.

and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.

you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.

and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.

your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.

in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.

in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.

so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.

you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.

once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.

and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"

you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?

hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!

you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.

we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?

#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck #good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen #im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3 #writeblr #the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this''#and like also #''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist #i was <3 punctured <3 during mine #and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion''#so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3 #she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh #ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance #i'd crash on the table #like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it #and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop!#and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just #woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes #she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room #from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing #and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying #and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap #with this terrible memory #i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like #that was too many liters #and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home #i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after #that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty #you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it #while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED #and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.

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monzabee · 12 days

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viva las vegas - mv1 (+18)

masterlist ||

Summary: The one where you and Max celebrate his win in a way you’ve never done before.

Pairing: max verstappen x reader

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, having sex tipsy but there is consent?, manhandling, unprotected sex (are you even surprised at this point), oral (fem receiving), sex (duh), cursing, cockwarming (oops), minors dni!!

Request: “Hey babe! I’m obsessed with your last Charles piece, I’ve been wanting to read something like that for such a long time and you did it perfectly 😍🥹 I was wondering if I could request kind of the same concept with Max Verstappen? Like he always is pictured as a tough guy and stuff, but when you see him in videos he’s kind of a goof, so I imagine the first time he’s intimate with his gf they’d both laugh and have the sweetest time together”

Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! is this my best work? no but it is something i managed to get done for the first time in like a month so here it is!! finishing this fic was a journey within itself, but i can honestly say that it was also kind fun? also, i saw a picture of max in his suit from vegas and that just inspired this whole thing, so i hope you guys enjoy! good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee

Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms.

Max is buzzing with life, quite literally, you can feel him practically buzzing the whole time he’s trying to take you back to your hotel room as fast as possible. It’s most likely due to the amount of alcohol the two of you have consumed after the race. Honestly it is pure luck that you found your way back to your room, given your current state, but instead of joining you when you jump on the bed, revelling in its comfort, he chooses to stand at the end of the bed as he watches you with an entertained smile on his face.

“What?” you ask, a laugh washing through you as you raise yourself on your elbows, “Why are you looking at me like that?”

He lets his eyes wander over your figure, his smile becoming more boyish as he lets it widen on his face, “You look pretty,” he murmurs, bending down so he can lower himself over your body better, “have I told you how beautiful you looked tonight?”

“Um, yeah, Maxie,” you giggle as you point out, “you’ve been telling me that the entire night.” Using your hands as support while raising yourself more so that you could be face to face with him, “I think you look pretty too, you know?”

“Yeah?” Max murmurs, cradling your jaw in one of his hands, his thumb quick to caress the apple of your cheek, which causes you to lean into his touch. “What if I wanted to kiss you, would that be okay?”

The smile you offer him in return is sweet, the way your eyes seem to shine at the offer of feeling his lips against yours makes his heart beat faster in his chest. “Yes, please.” Your voice is softer, almost comes out as a whisper due to you suddenly feeling out of breath.

And who is he to deprive his girl?

He doesn’t waste any time pressing his lips against your awaiting ones, in fact, the movement of his lips are rushed, if not almost desperate. It's as if he can't get enough, as if he's afraid this moment might slip away like sand through his fingers. The taste of alcohol lingers on both your lips, and normally you would be weirded out about it, but you realise it only adds to the intensity of the kiss you’re sharing with Max. His fingers gently tangle in your hair as he deepens the kiss, and you find yourself responding eagerly. You let him take control, mostly because it’s so easy for you to lose yourself in his kiss. He’s lost in it too, if you had to guess, because the way his tongue is fighting over yours for dominance is so different compared to the way Max usually kisses you. You whine at the loss of his lips when he reluctantly pulls away, and if he wasn’t already hard, the sound makes Max’s cock instantly harder. His head is thrown back, eyes closed as he lets out a groan, and he has to stop himself from pulling you in for another kiss. But you clearly have other plans as you drag your lips down towards his jawline, leaving kisses in a random pattern until you reach that one specific point on his neck that absolutely drives him crazy.

And you know it’s only a matter of time until he stops you, again, as he has done for the past whatever months of your relationship. It’s not that you are not attracted to each other, because the attraction is as clear as day, and you have done stuff – not sex, but stuff. You’re not sure Max does that, but you also don’t want to be the one who pressures him into having sex with you if he doesn’t want to. Unbeknownst to you, the same goes for Max, who thinks you’re not ready to have sex with him and wants your first time together to be as special as possible.

So no, you’re not surprised as he gently peals himself from you, causing you to whine again at the loss of him, but instead he gives you a small kiss on the forehead as he mumbles, “Why don’t you take a shower? We’ll go to bed after that.”

“Is that your way of telling me I smell?” You ask in a playful tone, and he responds to you with a roll of his eyes. “What if I don’t want to go to sleep?”

“No?” He asks, actively searching your expression for any sign of discomfort or reluctance. “We’ve had a long day, are you sure you don’t want to get some sleep?” The look you give him in return for his question is enough, and he knows this, but he also wants to actually hear the words, so he points, “Use your words, liefje.”

A puff of breath leaves your lips in annoyance, but, nonetheless, you give him the best puppy dog eyes you can muster as you whine, “Please Maxie, you know what I want.”

“Do I?” He muses, pulling you onto his lap as he ghosts his lips across your jaw. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Maxie,” you drag out his name, whining as your attempt at rolling your hips against his thighs don’t work. “You are being mean.”

“Oh, baby,” he mockingly copies your pout, “I’m sorry. Can I apologise with a kiss?” To make his point, he presses a couple of soft kisses along your jawline.

“Will you kiss me the way I like?” You ask, slightly out of breath, but his agreement that comes in the form of a hum makes you smile mischievously. His lips trail more kisses towards the neckline of your dress, and eventually through the valley between your breasts that is exposed by the lack of fabric. And you have every intention to let him have his way with you, you really do – after all, he won another great race. But a part of you also knows that making him suffer, even if just a little bit, in the process is so much more fun. So, just as he’s about to free of your breasts from the bustier of your dress, you quickly move away, slipping from his hands, trying your hardest not to laugh at the bewildered expression on his face. “On second thought, I think I’m going to take that shower after all.”

“I—what?” Max mumbles, his slightly swollen lips pulled in a pout, and you can’t help but give him a small kiss.

“I’ll see you after my shower, Max Emilian.” Sauntering over to the bathroom, you make sure to add an extra sway to your hips – and the sigh that Max leaves cause the smirk on your face to grow.

It’s pure torture for Max to wait until you come out of the shower. Not that he doesn’t think about just joining you, especially after the show you just put on, but that would be giving into what you want – and though Max is a generous lover, he is also stubborn. He is more than happy to give you what you want, as long as it is on his terms. And so, he waits patiently, until you come out of the bathroom, a robe draped over your body, and he can’t help himself but let his eyes roam over your body.

“How was your shower?” Max asks, trying to keep his voice as nonchalant as possible, a wolfish grin curving up on his lips. He rests his hands behind his head, relaxing onto the pillows behind him. He watches you give him a shrug, the soft-looking material sliding of your shoulder slightly as you collect your hair onto your shoulder. “Are you giving me the silent treatment, pretty girl?”

There’s a coy smile on your face as you shake your head, once, twice, as your teeth press down on your bottom lip. Max wants nothing more than to release your lip, pull you into his lap and have his way with you, but no. No, because Max is nothing if not disciplined. “Come here,” he asks, straightening up in his place. You, being the ever-loving girlfriend you are, oblige his request. “That is a nice robe,” he murmurs, tilting his head as he grabs the towelette belt with the tips of his finger, “is it as soft as it looks?”

“Mhm-hm,” you nod, “do you want to feel it?”

“Do I want to feel it?” Max muses, “Sure.” His arms wrap around your middle so quickly that you don’t realise he’s pulling you into his lap at first. But he positions you with your legs on the either side of his. “You’re right, liefje, it is very soft.” His hands roam on your body over the soft material, but soon enough, his hands dipping underneath it to feel your skin. His eyebrows shoot upwards, a mischievous grin spreading on his lips, “No underwear?”

“Well, I just came out of the shower, Maxie.” You give him an innocent look, shrugging once against as you rest your hands against his shirt-clad chest. “The shower pressure was great, you should’ve joined me.”

He lets out a noncommittal hum, his hands roaming on your bare skin, revelling in the softness. “I’ll have to take your word for it.” He’s methodical as he slightly shifts you in his lap, tearing a gasp from the back of your throat. That gets a satisfied smile from him, “Something wrong?”

“N-no,” you mumble, shifting again to get the same feeling, but his hands still you in your place. “Maxie,” you whine, silently pleading with your eyes.

“Am I being mean again?” He asks, attentive eyes fixed on you, “I would offer to make it up to you with a kiss, but you seem to find ways to evade me when I do.”

“No,” you whine again, lips pouted in disagreement. “I promise I won’t this time.”

His eyebrows shoot up again with amusement, “Oh, yeah? Shall we test that theory, pretty girl?” The smile you give him is shy, but the way you nod is nothing short of coy. With a satisfied sound leaving his lips, he quickly presses his lips against yours. You sigh into the kiss, immediately, when you feel him deepening the kiss, more than happy to surrender yourself to him and let Max take the lead. Though, that doesn’t necessarily stop you from attempting to relieve the pressure between your legs by rolling your hips against his thighs. Your efforts, however, prove to be useless as he stops the movement before you can actually relieve any of it. He slowly pulls away, pushes a stray piece of wet hair behind your ear and tuts – condescendingly, you might add – “Slow down, liefje, I think I’ve had enough speed for one day.”

Groaning at his words, “But Maxie,” you whine, dragging out his name as you let your hands wander on his chest over his shirt and receive a warning look from him in return, “I promise I’ll be good, please just fuck me.”

“Baby,” he coos, his fingers working quickly to unfasten the belt of your robe and push the offending clothing off your shoulders, “I literally just told you to be patient, no?”

You ignore the raised eyebrow, the look of faux-disappointment, and even the way his fingers grab your waist because you’re too busy trying to get him out of his shirt, suddenly feeling too exposed as you sit on his lap naked. “Please,” you whisper against his skin, peppering kisses across the column of his throat as your hands make their way inside his shirt, “I’ll be patient next time.”

“I’m suddenly realising that I spoil you very much,” Max mumbles, pulling his head back to get a look at you.

Pulling back as well you give him a mischievous grin, “Maybe, but you’ll give me what I want this time as well.”

“Yeah?” He asks, “Why?”

“Because I think I’m getting your pants very messy right now.”

Max can’t help the groan that escapes past his lips, his eyes quickly following yours as he takes in the ‘damage’ your wetness has caused on his jeans. He takes a moment to assess the damage, drags his eyes up to look at you when he notices the way your eyes stay fixed down, as your nervously bite down on your lower lip. He loses all the composure he managed to muster up, and he finally gives in, quickly pushing you off him onto the pillows on the bed. The squeal that leaves you is followed by a string of giggles that leave your lips, and when Max looks at you, he takes in the darker look in your widened eyes.

“I was going to be patient; I can’t believe you’re making me not be patient.” He mumbles, taking off his shirt and the rest of his clothes before starting to leave kisses on your feverish skin as he slides down your body and places himself between your thighs.

You open your legs wider to accommodate his body, a breathy laugh escaping past your lips. “You mean, impatient?”

That earns you a nip on your upper thigh and a warning look, but instead of commenting on your quip, he lowers his face, keeps his eyes locked to yours and gets to work. And it’s not that you and Max haven’t done stuff – because it’s the opposite; although you haven’t had sex, it’s safe to say that the two you have explored every option bordering on sex. But how he’s acting right now is much different than the way how he is usually with you. His movements are almost rushed, and the way he drags his tongue through your folds is just enough for your eyes to roll back as your moans fill the room.

Normally, he would be extra careful and make sure he is being gentle with you; but right now, he’s just trying to savour you before he loses all his composure. A choppy gasp leaves you as you feel his fingers enter you – two at first, and the way he pumps them in and out of you makes breathing harder. The speed of his fingers matches his tongue, and for a moment, you think you’re going to pass out. With his free hand, he blocks any type of movement you try with your hips; his palm sneakily presses down on your lower stomach to keep you in your place, but it’s jokes on him because if anything, it just makes you feel even better, and you’re not shy to let him know just how much he’s making you feel good with your moans.

“Max,” you say his name in a breathy whimper, fingers threading through his hair to guide him, “fuck, I’m so close.” You can practically feel the way his lips curl up, and suddenly, everything about his actions gets faster. His fingers are pistoning in and out of you in an unforgiving pace, in sync with his tongue that works your clit just the same. So, it’s no surprise when you find yourself coming on his tongue as his name leaves your lips for the umpteenth time like a prayer.

The smirk he gives you when he pulls himself from between your legs is sinful – he looks absolutely debauched with the way his lips glisten with your release, and he wastes no time before coming up, and capturing your lips in yet another bruising kiss. But this time, you taste yourself on his tongue and this time it makes you lose the whatever little resolve you’ve had left. So, you hook your leg around his thigh to push him next to you on the bed as you practically throw him next to you on the bed.

Though he has other plans. Of course.

So, as you’re trying to fight the seventy-kilogram-something driver into staying under you on the bed, he has no problem manhandling you into rolling on your side. And as you’re pressed flush against his chest, you turn your head backwards to breathlessly whisper, “You promised, Max.”

“And I am a man of my word, aren’t I?” He retorts, his hand that is splayed on your thigh positions it so that it’s bent towards your stomach, “Just needed to get you ready.” You can’t help the guttural moan that escapes you when you feel him pressing the tip of his cock into your entrance. The pleading look you give him must’ve worked, because this time it’s his turn to let out a guttural moan as he pushes himself into you. There is no sign of his mood from mere moments ago as you feel his hands caress your bare hip, an entitled smirk on his lips as he asks, “Out of breath?”

“Fuck you,” your response comes out as a breathy laugh as you’re pushing your hips closer to his to take him deeper.

“Lifje, you are fucking me.” Max giggles into the crook of your neck as he pushes himself in fully. You would be furious with him if it didn’t make you laugh also, and although the laughing decrease, the smiles remain on both your faces as he starts slowly moving his hips.

It’s sweet, unbelievably sweet, considering the sexual tension that was in the room an hour ago, but the way Max is fucking you can only be described as sweet. His hands caress every part of your body that he can reach – your thighs, to your hips, to your stomach, to your chest and then wraps one of his hands around your throat; not in a way that is rough, but in a way that he can still keep you still as he captures your lips for another kiss. The movement of his hips is languid, almost lazy as drive into you, but he still manages to hit all the spots along the way. Breathy chuckles are exchanged when he pulls away for you to organise your breathing, but your smiles still stay on, even when he raises your bent leg and rests his on his own leg. The new angle makes your moans get louder, your hips to move against his faster, and you can feel your orgasm approach speedily.

But Max is so in tune with your body that he knows what’s coming (or rather who) before you get a chance to actually have to say anything. His hand slides down your body so that he can press his fingers to your clit and move them in tight circles, and as if it was possible, his you can suddenly feel him fucking you even deeper. “You are going to come for me pretty girl, I can feel it.” He murmurs into your skin, and all you can offer as an answer is a nod and an affirmative whimper as you squeeze your eyes shut. “Come on, give it to me, come on my cock.” And though he is not the most verbal person to ever exist, except for when he’s in the mood to be an absolute yapper, his words urge you to let go of the feeling that has been starting to brew in your stomach.

Your hips start moving to meet his in choppy movements as you seek any and all kinds of pleasure to reach your high, and he meets your every move with increasing intensity of his own. “Max, yes!” Your exclamation hits his ears as he hits that one particular spot, making you instantly become lax in his arms as he guides you through your orgasm. His name spills out from your lips in constant repetition, “So good, so good,” you keep mumbling in breathless whimpers, trying to press yourself further into his body.

With all things considered, it doesn’t take Max long to reach his own high following your own, since you insistently move your hips in a way that makes you take his cock even deeper when he’s helping you ride your orgasm. So, when you hear him groaning your name in the crook of your neck and feel him spilling himself into you. “Fuck, you feel so good,” he croaks out, holding your hips in place with his hands splayed on your feverish skin. “Why didn’t we do this sooner?”

“How am I supposed to know, dummy?” You ask, throwing your head back to get a good look of his dishevelled state, “Why do you look so good after mind blowing sex?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs, pulling you with him as he lets himself fall back on the bed, “genetics?”

“Mhm,” you murmur, trying to find a comfortable position on his chest as he is still inside you, “remind me to send your mother a flower arrangement when we get back, or something.”

A deep blush covers his cheeks, as if he hasn’t been fucking you for the past hour or so, as he stammers, “I– I mean, yeah.” This time, it’s your turn to give a non-committal hum, followed by a satisfied sigh as you snuggle him closer and close your eyes. “Just go to sleep, baby, we can deal with it in the morning.”

“’Mkay,” you mumble, feeling his hand draw soothing circles on your back. “But you’re still gonna fuck me tomorrow, right?”

This gets another loud laugh from the driver laying down under you, and both of you know that he’s going to do just that when you wake up in the morning.

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katszumi · 2 months

Text

bakugou hated defeat. he was never one to forfeit anything. if he could challenge the ocean to a battle, he would and sincerely believe he’d win.

once, he admits defeat to the universe and chooses to let you slip through his fingers.

when he began to fall in love with your sweet manner, delicate touch, warm smile and witty behavior, he also began to hate himself.

he hated the way he was when it came to feelings. he knew he wasn’t able to express his emotions like a good boyfriend should. he was intolerable, insufferable. something that couldn’t have mixed with you.

love was a foreign concept to him, something he couldn’t grasp but something he desperately wished for deep down, no matter how many times he brushed it off or ridiculed the idea.

bakugou knew love wasn’t designed for him, and he wasn’t ever going to let his silly imagination deceive him otherwise.

but, he knows his heart never stands a chance. especially tonight when he finds you on the terrace of ua. the night-sky wrapped the area in its darkness, the crescent moon illuminating the brightest color it could, and the silent night bringing the greatest solitude it could.

bakugou attempts to leave you be, but your eyes find him faster than he originally thought, him being pulled into your magnetic, overwhelming aura.

“hey,” he begins, a slight waver in his voice from his nerves. “not enjoyin’ the party inside?”

you chuckle slightly, waving his question off. “just needed some air.”

bakugou nods in response. he folded his arms over the railing, taking in the scenery around them.

it was the last night for the third years at ua, everyone celebrating their triumphs, losses, friendships. it was the last time they’d be within this building all together, the last time bakugou could silently admire you from afar. he’d always think about his last day there, wondering if he’d be shouting from excitement. he wasn’t close to thinking that he’d feel like his whole world was coming down.

you were planning to travel to the united states to start your hero debut, receiving an offer there that you just couldn’t pass up. he remembered the moment when you told him so vividly. you wore a huge smile, basically jumping out of excitement. that was the first time bakugou came to the realization that he couldn’t have you.

truth be told, he was scared of breaking paths with you. anger, sorrow, fear. you shone a light on all of those emotions. it felt like his anchor was gone. breaking every stable piece off of him one by one.

“so, what’s next for you? don’t think you ever told me your plan.”

in his head, bakugou replies with, that was on purpose. he wanted to remove everything from his mind. go with the flow and live in the moment until it was officially time to get started on his new path of life. but, he figured there was no more time to put it off.

“stay in the city for a bit. kirishima talked about collaboratin’ on an agency, so been givin’ that some consideration.” he replies somberly. “i don’t know really, just gotta find something to keep me busy.”

you echoed bakugou’s action from earlier, nodding to his statement. a small sigh parted your lips, partly from exhaustion, but also from sadness.

“you scared?” it came out as a whisper, as if it was a taboo subject to never touch on, and frankly it was when it came to bakugou.

he waited to respond, pausing for as long as he could before the silence turned uncomfortable.

“yeah.” something so simple but spoke so much considering bakugou would never admit such a thing. “you’ll be okay though. you got an offer some of us wish we could have, and i heard the states has good job opportunities.”

“i don’t wanna go.” first it came out as a mumble, bakugou unsure if he just understood the words that came out of your mouth.

“what?”

“i don’t want to go.” this time, your voice was much more stern.

“the fuck you talkin’ about? you’ve been excited for this shit the day you got the letter, now you don’t wanna go? as if.” he was aware that he came off a little too defensive, mostly to shield his heart from catching a little bit of hope, he didn’t mean to come at you so harshly.

you peeled your eyes away from him, purposely avoiding his eye contact. looking at him seemed more like receiving a scolding from a parent more than anything right now.

“i mean, the united states? i’ll be there alone, no family, no friends. it’s not the money or opportunities i’m concerned about, bakugou. it’s about my happiness.” you explained. “isn’t that something you’re thinking about too?”

bakugou weighs his options. he thinks he has nothing else to lose, but he also considers the fact of you breaking his heart even more than it is. besides, you were smart, he knew you were going to take the offer anyway no matter how bad your nerves were eating you up.

“you can’t think with your heart about things like this, y/n.” he knows he’s an asshole. he knows you’re looking to him for the reassurance you want to hear but he just can’t give it.

“i’m not! i just want to be happy doing the things i love and that’s not possible in an environment i cant stand to be in.”

“you don’t know that yet.”

“i’m getting a pretty good feeling.”

“because you’re scared.”

you shrug, “so what? you don’t know how i feel. you’ll be here with your mom, dad, and all of your friends. i’ll have to start over from scratch in a country i know nothing about.”

he scoffed, his eyes darting away from your figure. “right because you know exactly how i feel.” his tone bled with sarcasm.

“you don’t tell me how you feel for anything, so sorry for taking an educated guess.” you retorted.

“you never ask to begin with.”

“as if you’d even tell me. you think i haven’t noticed you avoiding me these past couple of weeks? you don’t even talk to me anymore.”

now the roles reversed, you stared at him, bakugou not daring to look into your eye.

he shifted in his position, beginning to become uncomfortable. he replayed in his mind what he should’ve done moments ago instead of coming to speak to you.

“nothing to say?” you were playing with fire, not caring that you were poking the bear. “guess that’s not anything new. you just do whatever you want, say whatever you wish without thinking of the other person, because you’re ‘katsuki bakugou’. the man who cares about none other than the title of being the number one hero.”

“that’s not fuckin’ true and you know it.” he snaps his head towards you.

“do i?” your eyes searched his. “maybe a few months ago i would’ve, but you’ve been treating me like an outcast recently. i thought i mattered to you! i thought we were something!”

“what do you want me to say here?”

“i want you to be honest.”

bakugou clenched his teeth, his jaw sharpening from the action. of course he wanted to be with you, there was no other girl that he could imagine being with. but it just couldn’t work. you weren’t made to be with a monster, and he didn’t deserve to enjoy something so sweet as you.

so, bakugou opted to refuse the truth once again, brushing her off.

“you’re just too good for me.” he simply replies. “don’t waste your potential here. go to america.”

bakugou takes no more time to indulge in your erratic behavior, so he leaves you at the terrace, the noise of the party being heard the moment he opened the side door.

he wanted you more than anything. if the universe loved him a little more, then maybe things between you two would work out. but because of his shitty luck and vexatious attitude, you two just didn’t match.

he also knew there was just someone you were bound to fall in love with in america.

bakugou wasn’t going to lead you on to make a stupid decision. even if that meant destroying himself in the process.

the morning after, your name wasn’t to be found on any of his socials, and his messages to you turned green. if he didn’t know before, then he definitely knew now that he burned anything he had with you.

pt two

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