leffee · 8 months ago
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Man nevermind, we're most likely going to put my dog to sleep tomorrow, this sucks
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callmerainman · 9 months ago
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Alastor in a relationship with a pure hearted s/o
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a/n. the relationship can be interpreted as queerplatonic or even romantic if you wish, but not sexual in any nature. hope Alastor is not ooc!
tw! canon typical violence
"cuddled up with a heart condemned, I should love you and I swear I do"
it's true that Alastor is touch averse, but this doesn't apply if it's you we're talking about.
also, we saw that Alastor dislikes physical touch only when it's someone else getting handsy with him. he can be pretty touchy if he wants to and likes to be close to you.
sneaking an arm around your waist, putting his hands on your shoulders, pecking your forehead. also, arms intertwined while walking around the city.
hand holding is more occasional, but not excluded at all.
he likes the sound of your laugh, and has a soft spot for your smile. he thinks that it suits you so well like a perfect-chosen accessory.
veeery protective. he knows you can be naïve and that Hell loves to take advantage of more innocent inhabitants.
he prefers to go with you when you have to leave the Hotel and strikes deathly smiles to anyone who dares to look at you with any kind of intention.
you're the only person who can see him drop his smile sometimes. he doesn't have to use it as a tool when you're around so there's no reason for him to always keep it. he doesn't feel vulnerable around your presence.
sometimes he comes back to the Hotel covered in blood. you don't approve his ways, and he knows, but he's just like this.
you shrug your shoulders, sigh, and then take some towels to clean him up.
"you'll end up ruining your coat and your pretty face like this"
loooves to dance with you. swing dancing specifically. maybe to the rhythm of an upbeat jazz tune in your room.
you were completely wack at dancing the Charleston, but he taught you well since he's an absolute beast at it.
you occasionally slow dance, it's a really intimate moment for you and Alastor and makes you both feel closer to each other. your favourite spot to slow dance is the forest in his room, especially at night under a clear and starry sky.
you like to drink together, he's a classy type of drunk and you make the best conversations while sharing a glass together.
sometimes, he'll start ruminating about the possibility of you redeeming yourself and leaving the Hotel.
he doesn't like ruminating, it makes him feel weird because he doesn't believe in redemption in the first place. so case closed...right?
he says to himself that even if you were to be, he would find a way to let you stay.
but he immediately tells himself that he doesn't want to force you. but he also starts to get concerned because it's not like him to contain himself and his cold heart. more ruminating, more concerned Alastor.
he's aware that he cares about you, and that you're special to him and that he feels a deep rooted love. but he never thought it would affect his evilness and now he's confused.
you like to cook for him, since you're aware that he's a huge foodie. and he loves to do the same for you! he likes to share his mom's recipes.
loves to call you "my darling"
you like to hang out at his radio tower, just listening to him intently while he hosts a program.
sometimes even asks you to join in to talk about jazz!
very occasionally sleeping together, just holding your hands with fingers intertwined.
honestly Alastor doesn't even know what love is, but he just knows that he feels it for you.
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he-calls-me-kitten · 5 months ago
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Sugar, Spice and a Tempting Vice (1)
VA! MC x OM! Characters
TW: Eh it's more fluffy than smutty I'd say, but minors DNI. Loads of random lore for the sake of immersion. Now to brainstorm the rest of the characters.
INTRO
Tagging: @romaissa @eliciana @your-favorite-god @april-notthemonth69 @ikevampharem @k8tznd8wgz @futureittomain @m-majoko @the-auguer @yurinayumi @i-am-empress-irish @deepazur @rippedbutnotamasterpiece @pomegranateboba @ra1ns70rm @anjodedesgostoeerros @sammywo @annoyingbiscuitathleteland-blog @ourfinalisation @creativecupcake @snowthatareblack @angelofbooksworld
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"After a freak accident, you and a group of 5 people get teleported into a fantastical world together. Who will you team up with to try and leave this place? Or will they convince you to stay and have a new life with them here instead? Or will you stumble across the biggest secret that this new world holds...?"
You read out the summary for them at a group dinner at Diavolo's castle. Apparently, it was to celebrate your debut as a VA. They all clapped and bombarded you with questions. You tried to answer as many as you could without any spoilers.
They were supposed to have already started playing the game but the game servers got a little overwhelmed and had to go under maintenance with so many people downloading and making accounts at the same time. So Diavolo hosted this party instead.
"So how many endings can you get with a single character?" Simeon inquired.
"Well on an average there's around 12 endings per character, but there's a varying number of endings depending on the character you choose. I'm not sure I remember for all of them-"
"We just want to know yours." Belphie smirked.
"Oi come on, it makes it sound like you're all just going to play my character, don't do that! The other characters are also incredibly well written!"
The sheepish grins and side glances told you that they were clearly going ignore your last advice.
"Honestly you guys, one of the characters here has a teleportation ability, one can read minds, and another one has insane fighting skills - the only thing you know about my character is that I don't have a name!"
"Omg this means they are definitely building you upto to have the most OP ability of them all!" Levi exclaimed excitedly.
"Oh yes that's usually how it goes in these tropes. The most unassuming character ends up giving you the secret ending." Solomon nodded in agreement.
"Both of you, shush! Just play the game normally okay?! You will get to interact with all the characters anyway until the second phase." You reprimanded, sighing, knowing no one would listen anyway.
Lucifer - Saved by the Belle
"Before Tyla takes us home tomorrow, would you like to spend your last day here with me, Lucifer?"
Lucifer and you worked with loyalty and rigor under Tyla, an old world Sorceror. It was because of you two specifically that Tyla's magic was powerful enough to create a portal back home. Your character was so much like you - it felt like he completed this whole journey of freedom with you, and not just an image on screen.
> "Of course, MC. In fact...I would like to spend the night with you too."
MC blushed on screen, looking away and nodding. "Oh? Well then... I'll look forward to it."
He enjoys this way more than he thought he would. He visits for the last time, all the places you both had been together. The first tavern, the first forest path, the first temporary abode - the HumbleBee Inn.
> "It's late. Should we go back here again, for old times sake?"
"Why not? Maybe they'll accidentally put us in the same room again and get overbooked so we have no other choice. Maybe this time it'll be a bit more...eventful." You said with a sly and knowing smile as you skipped ahead.
Lucifer's knee jerked upwards, hitting the table. Just what kind of lines are these? And what are those expressions? Who else was in there listening to you when you recorded this? The way your voice sounded, Lucifer was convinced you were thinking about someone special. If only you saw the effect you were having on him.
> "I've been holding back all day. Forgive me if I'm too rough."
Lucifer pushes you against the wall, caging your body. You blush in the dark, your arms wrapping around his shoulders. It was driving him insane. He could feel his pants getting tighter at the crotch.
Last time he endured the sexual tension of sharing the bed with you, constantly trying avoid your body even though he was desperate to feel it's warmth. This time there wasn't any reason to deprive himself.
"It's okay...I can take it. Please don't hold back..."
Oh hell, you were about to be the death of him. These...are these really the sounds you'd make in bed? Godamnit you are ruining his mind. He can't relax until he's jerked off now. And it's all your fault.
The next couple days, you notice Lucifer hesitates to keep eye contact with you. In fact, he has a rather visceral reaction every time you simply call his name, standing at his door. Only he knows how badly he wants to pull you into his bed to ravage you - practice your lines with him, why don't you?
Mammon - Stranded Together
"Guess they didn't want either of us huh, Mammon?"
Nah Mammon was mad at this ending. He gets why the group left him behind - he made too many questionable choices like stealing the last reserves of food or money (so you never went hungry), running away from the monsters instead of staying and fighting with the group(with you ofc so you wouldn't be in any danger), finding new shelter and not telling anyone (except you).
> "I'm so sorry...it's because of me that they left you too. You did nothing wrong yet...no this will not stand! I'll go threaten them into taking you too!"
"Mammon wait- no don't! Alright fine I was lying! They didn't leave me...I chose not to go!"
Mammon was stunned. He stared at your character blushing and looking elsewhere while holding onto his arm. His heart beat just a little bit faster.
> "Wait...what? But you wanted to...don't you want to go back and keep looking for your family?!"
"Who knows if the family I was looking for even exists?! But you...you are real. And you are so kind to me, and so great. So..."
Your character moved in closer and closer to him. Mammon leaned back too far from the screen, falling backwards on the floor. He was not ready for what was about to come.
"If I really want a family that bad...I can just make one here...with you. But only if you wanted that too ..."
> "I do! Of course I do! We can both find work and home in the kingdom now that big monsters are all dead! I'll be yours and you'll be mine!"
Mammon pressed it on instinct, not knowing his character was gonna grab yours and pin them to the ground. His face burnt up in excitement seeing you all cornered like this. You blushed and whispered as you leaned in to kiss him.
"Hehe...Mammon...I'm all yours already. But there's others ways you can claim me if you like..."
Your sleeves fell loose, and off your shoulders and his hands began to wander. Mammon almost screamed the house down, grabbing at his sheets, humping his pillows, struggling to look away from the screen. But he couldn't stop.
How the fuck was he supposed to face you tomorrow at the breakfast table?! Yet, Mammon re-played that part at least 30 times. And now every time you whispered to him in class, Mammon had to grip his knees and stop himself from imagining the unholiest things.
Leviathan - Power of Friend-ship??
"We did it! We actually did it, Levi! Can you believe it?! Look even the people are cheering for us!"
Levi punched the air in glee, he definitely must have gotten the best ending right?! That was such an intense combat scene - he almost cried when he thought you got swallowed by the Giant of The Depths, then he watched you burst out of its stomach with all the other victims while he slashed through its neck. You and him - the two underdogs dealt the final blow. At this point, every other character was shipping you two together.
> "Let's go Army of the Third Lord!"
MC cheered and high fived him from the screen, while the rest of the group danced in celebration! Ah MC had already become one of his favourite characters of all time. He had already preordered the action figures, posters and a body pillow (yes the ecchi one).
"Come on Levi, won't you join the celebration feast!? Everyone is calling for you!"
Oh no this was Levi's nightmare. Loud and crowded parties - but it was you asking him to go, what if he missed out on an important secret ending. Just to be safe he chose a neutral option to see what you would prefer.
> ... I'm not too sure.
"Then...would you like to celebrate in private with me? I know a quiet place with a good view."
Levi almost fell out of his seat. It's happening. This is where he unlocks the hidden erotic ending. The blush on your face, the way you held out your hand for him to take - biting down on his knuckles in excitement.
> I'd really prefer that! Thank you!
You smile and nod, leading him by the hand to a nearby pond. The moonlight shimmered on the water, the reflections dancing on your skin as you both lay down next to each other. Levi could feel himself falling for you all over again.
"Look Levi, in the pond! The Gloriees are back! Aren't they beautiful?"
Levi looked at the pond in awe, glowing orange fishes swam around in the waters, jumping in and out. He watched the fishes swim around the hand you put in the water. It was like you and hundred Henries in the water.
> "So beautiful..."
"They are my absolute favorite....they have the same color as your eyes..."
Your hands reach up to touch his face, pulling him closer and Levi feels all his self restraint jump out the window. He tried to grab and kiss you but ended falling in the water with you instead.
"Oh? I didn't know I excite you so much... don't worry, it makes me really happy..."
You rose from the water, laughing and coughing slightly, your entire body now laid bare through the transparent white cloth. And if that wasn't already bad enough, he heard your moans as his character started going at it with you in the lake. You were so professional, so skilled at it...he thought he was prepared for it but he clearly wasn't.
Levi couldn't resist jerking himself off there and then, soiling his computer screen with light ropes of his cum. Now every time you announced you were going to shower, this image just popped into his mind, giving him instant boners at the most unfortunate times. And god forbid he sees you walk out of the shower with your hair wet - he'll have to rush to his room to hide that he's creamed his pants.
Satan - Bridge to Televithyia
"Satan, I will be waiting for you always. I know if fate wills it, I'll definitely get to see you again."
Satan cursed himself for this ending, almost chucking his phone at the wall. His magical powers no longer worked since the portal now connected him to his own world. And while you could use all your magic here, it would lose all power in his world. With both worlds needing help after a long and destructive battle, you both knew it was selfish to abandon your either of them - especially since you two were the only Great Guardians left.
> "I will find a permanent path between our worlds. I swear upon my life, MC."
Damnit this game had better not cut his story short. He was willing to keep going, trying to fix the playthrough so he could make a good ending out of this. Just you wait MC, he's not letting you go. A part of him wanted to go into your room and hug you, just to make sure you're there atleast in real life.
Satan rubbed furiously at his eyes as you waved him goodbye. His total playtime could rival Levi's. After gathering enough resources and magical knowledge - he could finally get started on creating the bridge. But to his pleasant surprise, he only needed to build half of the bridge, because there you were standing on the other - building your own path towards him too.
"Satan...is this a dream? Are you really back? Or is this another magical illusion again...?"
Satan blushed as you rushed to hug him peppering kisses all over his face. He had to physically get away from the game, walk around, and silently scream into his hands before he could calm himself down. Because he knew even better things were yet to come.
> "It's really me, MC. I'm sorry did I make you wait too long? I missed you so terribly...I have so many things to tell you about..."
"Come with me, we've been rebuilding our town. I know a place we can catch up...it's a special place I helped build with you in mind."
Satan follows you, your arms intertwined. You point out places to him - old renovations and newer projects. You tell him about everything that's been happening since he left.
How some endangered species came back to life, how the remaining smaller beasts were tamed and how the cursed were given peace. You stopped suddenly in front of a quaint little cottage.
"Welcome to my humble abode. I'm sorry I didn't prepare a separate room for you...because I thought you wouldn't mind sharing a bed with me..."
He blushes and grips your hand as you open the door to your room. He sees pictures of both of you on the wall and next to the bed.
> "You already built a home...with me in mind. *Smiles* Yet...the bed looks in it hasn't been slept in for a while? Did you get no sleep for the past few days?"
"Actually I haven't slept in the bed yet. I sleep on the sofa - I know it's silly but I really don't like sleeping alone in a place of two..."
Satan grips the phone tighter, as he makes his character push you on the bed. How sweet - you both get to enjoy it together for the first time. He climbs after you, trapping you underneath him.
> "Good thing I'm here now, MC."
He cups your face and trails his hands downwards, undoing some buttons on your clothes. You kiss his palms and tug down his collar.
"It's a pity though...I don't think we'll be using the bed for sleeping tonight afterall..."
He watched the screen, slack-jawed as I heard your sultry voice echoing through his room. He fell back on his pillow, hurriedly attaching his earphones. It proved to be more lethal. He could almost imagine you in his bed right now, kissing your way down his chest, while he fondles your bottom.
When you approached him later asking if he liked your work in the game, he had to cover half his face to hide the redness. He couldn't possibly tell you that he had downloaded snippets of all your moans and saved them to a secret folder. Or that he listened to them quite frequently.
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mrsdesade · 4 months ago
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What about some Homelander x needy fem reader smut? He made her cry and then he goes soft on her? :)
Say no more anon, here's something for you! It will definitely be something long because I liked the idea so much!
Afterparty;
Pairing: Homelander x fem!super (Ophera as usual) TW: NSFW, mention of drugs, teasing, smut, fluff, aftercare Words count: 2,6k
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You and Homelander are attending a night party hosted by Vought, a grand event where the company's high-profile visitors and staff gather to mingle and celebrate.
Was as extravagant as ever, with celebrities, influencers, investors, and a few lucky civilians gathered together in an opulent ballroom. Laughter and music filled the air as people mingled around, engaging in small talk and celebrating.
You've had plenty of conversations, meetings with executives and public appearances with Homelander. By the looks of it, you've both done your part to keep up the public image that Vought has made of you two.
Exausting.
As the night starts slowly to wind down, you find yourselves with a brief moment alone. Homelander looks at you with a mix of tiredness and relief, as if he can finally let his guard down now that you two are out of the spotlight.
"Goddamn, these parties are a pain. I know they're important for the image, but dealing with all those people trying to win my favor… it's starting to wear me down."
He lets out a frustrated huff, his eyes flitting over the crowd around you.
"I swear I could snap the neck of the next person who comes up to me asking for an autograph or a selfie..."
You simply let out a little laugh, but your eyes are wandering around, and your arms are crossed at your stomach, you seem distracted.
Homelander notices the hint of something amiss in your laughter, his sharp senses picking up on the fact that you're not quite comfortable.
"Hey, you alright? You're not your usual self tonight."
''I think I drank too much, I've been feeling strange ever since the party began...but I only drank two glasses of champagne, alcohol usually doesn't cause me problems.''
It's clear that something is wrong, the more he looks at you, the more the signs of your discomfort are visible. Under the beautiful make-up that has been done on you, your cheeks are red, and a few small drops of sweat slide down your temple. Quite strange, since it's December, outside is snowing.
"Two glasses of champagne shouldn't have that kind of effect on you. You're a damn superhero, and a strong one. Are you seriously getting ill from some champagne? I was waiting for a more epic weakness, you know? Something like kryptonite, I don't know."
''If you're here to make fun of me you can go back to the party. Fuck, they must have mixed some kind of drug in my drink. Maybe something that would kill a human has that effect on me. That's the only explanation I have..."
''Someone was stupid enough to drug you? I should find whoever did it and rip their damn head off."
''You're not helping me.''
Your look of disapproval is eloquent, you would like to explain the situation to him better, but you can't do it explicitly. He seems really stupid to you right now. You're holding your chest tight with your arms, your legs are shaking slightly and for the first time you're struggling to stand on your heels.
"What do you want me to do, hold your hand and comfort you? I'm not exactly known for my tender side, you know."
Despite his words, he comes closer to support you with a hands on your back, it seems like you could fall to your knees at any moment.
But immediately he can feel your skin unnaturally warm to the touch. It's at that moment that he starts to notice something unusual, a change in your demeanor. Your breathing is rapid and shallow, and your eyes have a glassy look.
Homelander's eyes widen in realization, as he finally connects the dots.
''...those bastards. They have put an aphrodisiac in your drink.''
''Wow, It took you a while to understand, men never think about these things, I honestly envy you.''
The situation is quite embarrassing for you, but you still manage to want to make fun of him. You have found a stable and comfortable position holding on to his arm, everything seems normal to the people around you, but you know that you will be able to control yourself only for a short time.
He notices the change in your behavior, feeling your hand gripping tighter onto his arm, and the proximity of your body next to his. He clears his throat, trying to maintain his composure.
"Yeah, laugh it up. But you're the one who's struggling to stand still. How the hell did they pull something like this off? I thought Vought security was supposed to prevent something like this from happening."
It's clear that you're not listening to him, you feel the warm from your legs coming up to your throat. You bite your lower lip trying to think as little as possible, but your gaze falls on his hands, causing your mind to drift to absolutely less pure thoughts.
"What are you looking so intently at my hands?''
You lean in a bit closer to him, your playful demeanor turns more tempting, and your voice lowers to a sultry tone, his right hand still holding onto your waist and your running up on his fingers.
''Can't you imagine?''
Homelander tries to maintain his cool demeanor, but he's failing miserably.
Your fingers continue to softly caress his hand, tracing circles on his knuckles, adding to the tension between you two. You take a small step closer, your body now almost pressed against his, and look up at him through your eyelashes, a sly smile on your lips.
"All the things I'm holding myself back from asking you to do to me right now."
His mind suddenly fills with images of what you're hinting at. But he remained silent, faking a smile to the guest who are still walking around the room.
''Come on Homelander, let's get away from this party. I need you. I crave your touch. On me. In me.''
Your lips ghost along his jawline, pressing the promise of a kiss near his ear. You know exactly what to say to convince him, even If your mind is not completely clear, you know what you want and how to get it.
"Please, I'm begging you."
His self-control is about to snap.
''Fine, let's get out of here before I lose my damn mind. Follow my lead and act natural."
He starts guiding you towards the exit, with a certain urgency, casually nodding to guests and saying brief goodbyes as you make your way out of the room.
As you make your way through the crowd, you try your best to act normal and compose yourself, but it's becoming increasingly difficult to keep up the facade. Finally, he finds a secluded corridor and leads you into an empty room, shutting the door behind him.
The moment the door closes, the illusion of control shatters. The tension that have been building up between you two throughout the night reach their peak, and he takes a step forward but you are the first to close the distance and kiss him. Your body wants nothing more than him, the effect of the drug is getting worse and although you haven't said anything, your body language is more than eloquent.
The sight and feel of you, craving for him so openly, is intoxicating.
"God, you're too damn beautiful, Ophera. I've never saw you so messy and needy... only for me.''
''Oh, just for one time, could you just shut up and use your hands for something useful?''
"Eager, aren't we? Don't worry, I'll gladly indulge you.''
He wastes no time in doing as you demand. Your sparkling red dress falls to the floor, but the heat you feel continues to increase, you feel his hands descend on you, and his fierce kisses forbid you to breathe.
He pushes your legs apart with one hand, then he starts caressing you, making you release a sudden moaned whimper. The feel of his leather clad fingers moving so slowly it immediately brings you closer to the edge.
Ridiculous, how is this possible? You think. Ah, yes, that's right, the aphrodisiac, this sensation is like nothing you've ever felt. But it feels so freaking good.
His two fingers slides inside of you, he's enjoying the idea of torturing you. He can feel himself hardening more with every wet sound and moan from you, but driving you insane is going to be way more fun for him than sharing a temporary pleasure.
''...look at you, so needy just for my fucking fingers. You are truly shameless.''
Back against a cold wall, hands on his shoulders, balancing precariously on your heels while your legs tremble and your mind doesn't think clearly, this time he's in control. He's the one in charge.
Time begins to pass. Half an hour, an hour, two, three.
You're whining, you're moaning, and it sounds gorgeous.
What you don't know, is that from the exact moment he saw tears appear in your eyes, he wants to see you cry in his arms. He want to see you desperate for pleasure. You're nearly scream his name.
''You're making such a good show for me, keep going. Keep going...''
He’s enjoying how you’re desperately thrusting against him. Begging him do not stop. Ah yes, sxx between superheroes, durability is the key word to having an extreme fun. Or extreme pleasure. Y'know.
At a certain point you feel his hand move away a little, perhaps his intention was to move on to something more substantial, more thicker. But you immediately block him by grabbing his wrist. Your eyes meet again, and you really are a beautiful mess.
''Don't you dare...to stop...''
''You’ve had thirty orgasms. I'm at zero. How greedy you are.''
Bastard. He’s been keeping count.
''I don't care...touch me again, only one more time. Please...''
Your mind, now overwhelmed by ecstasy, having now the most intense moment of your life. It seems like you can't get enough, and here's his chance to get what he wants. He wants to see you cry.
''Then beg for it.''
His hand that he had leaning against the wall now comes violently wrapped around your neck. Since he can't satisfy himself, he decides that he will have fun in another way. Can't have the pleasure? Then he will have violence. Both are perfect.
Your legs are shaking again and your breath becoming more shallow. You murmur his name in short moans, begging him as he ordered, eyes closed as your makeup slowly begins to run on your cheeks, accompanied by a few small tears.
He is extremely fascinated by you in that moment, you're so lost in pleasure, so desperate for his touch to the point of crying.
''Homelander...''
You cried out as your body finally release, another orgasm coming down hard from your desperate wait. Your body shudders as your walls squeeze tighter around his fingers.
Then he pause, fingers slip out, he stopped for a second looking at you, still lost in the pleasure aftershocks.
Your body is drained of energy, your breathing ragged. You are too tired to speak, the intense moments you’ve experienced leaving you breathless. Your body feels weary and heavy, the afterglow of your passionate encounter still lingering in your core. And then your legs give out, and you stumble, risking falling, but the fact that he is in front of you, saves you.
''Hey-- you feel good? It was too much?''
He asked a bit worried, his arm wrapped securely around you.
A small, weary smile curves your lips, acknowledging his unexpected concern.
''Are you serious? It was...incredible. I assure you I'm fine, more than fine. Just a bit tired.''
He holds you firmly against him, his strong arms encircling your trembling body. He notices your exhaustion and the way your legs give out, nearly toppling over.
''Don't lie to me, tell me If there's something wrong.''
''Dear, I'm being more than sincere right now, do I seem regretful or unsatisfied? I don't think so.''
You laughed, taking him off guards with your spontaneity.
''Well--uhm, yeah okay, good. Now, let's get back to my apartment. The effect of the aphrodisiac has worn off, and soon you will feel cold with only this fancy dress on.''
''Sure...let's get back to the 99 floor.''
You try to move away from him a little, just a little to walk to the door, but you feel the balance missing and you fall back with your hands resting on his shoulders. Your expression is tired but amused, you find funny even a moment like this.
''Where do you think you're going? Come here, you tired diva. You don't have to walk, I'll carry you.''
He lifts you in his arms carrying you as you weigh nothing, and then he let out a short phrase whispered with kindness.
''I'll take care of you.''
He pauses for a moment, realizing the unfamiliar words that just slipped out of his lips. He clears his throat, trying to cover up the unexpected softness in his voice.
Your reaction is one of mild surprise mixed with a hint of amusement. You look at him with a sly smile, raising an eyebrow. Knowing damn well that he's not used to doing such things.
''Oh, what happened to the tough, domineering Homelander? Suddenly, you're acting all caring and loving.''
"Listen, why do you have to be so annoying?"
Homelander rolls his eyes in response to your playful remark. He knows you caught him in a moment of unexpected tenderness.
''Don't get used to it, doll. This is a one-time exception.''
You let out a small, satisfied laugh at his response, knowing you got under his skin again, like usual.
''Oh come on, lighten up. It's quite charming, you know. You playing the concerned and gentle lover.''
''Concerned and gentle lover, that's not really my thing, if you didn't notice.''
He watches you with a hint of skepticism, waiting for your next smart answer.
''So why did you put your cloak around my shoulders when you lifted me up? It was a spontaneous gesture and you didn't even notice it.''
Homelander froze for a moment, caught off guard by your observation. It was true, he had subconsciously done that without even thinking. He lets out a defeated sigh, realizing that you know that he cares, no matter how much he tries to deny it.
''Fine, you win. I didn't like seeing you shivering. And maybe because I…care.''
"Aww, who would have thought? The great Homelander, soft? For me? How unexpected. Maybe I should thank the one who put the drugs in my drink, without his intervention I would never have discovered this side of you.''
You smile warmly, teasingly caressing his hair with your hand while he's walking outside the room, It's now late at night and there's no one one around. Only the silence and the neon lights of the big Vought tower.
You hug him, staying close to him, safe in his arms, enjoying that moment of kindness that you don't know if it will ever return. But for tonight that's fine. You give him a gentle kiss on the cheek and let him carry you to his room.
''Damn you for making me say things like that.''
He whispered, after after gently placing you on the bed, where you will sleep together that night. You sink into the soft bed, a soft smile on your lips. You look up at him in the dim light, waiting for him. That smile will be his downfall, or yours, who knows.
He's secretly pleased by all of your lovely reaction, and he adores you so damn much, but he will never admit it.
-------
Thanks again for the request, it was really entertaining to write, hope you like it! Kisses <3
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lightfeltmemories · 11 months ago
Text
episode one: phantom troupe and romance; headcanons from least toxic, to most toxic
characters include: chrollo, machi, pakunoda, shizuku, uvogin, shalnark, feitan, phinks, bonolenov, kortopi, hisoka, illumi, nobunaga, franklin. (not in order)
tw's: nsfw but nothing explicit, mentions of non-con, spoilers for the deaths of pakunoda, shalnark, kortopi and uvogin, toxic relationships, lovebombing, mentions of torture (not on reader), mentions of cheating, mentions of reader's death,
notes: a completely self indulgent post, you can probably tell who im biased towards by how long certain sections are.
because this contains mentions of nsfw, do not interact if you are under 18, you will be blocked if you do !! also, do not leave negative comments please, they will be deleted :)
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pakunoda
out of everyone, guaranteed, she'll be the best partner out of everyone else, you might even end up shocked that she's apart of the troupe if it ever comes to you finding out.
she's a darling, spoils and cares for you like anyone else, a great listener and partakes in your interests in hobbies, its (almost) like a fairytale by how the relationship is, the troupe knows you but you don't know them! and she wants to keep it that way, of course still she's a murderer, so it would break her if you were to have found out about everything, she vowed to never let you know or even have you close to knowing about what she does, but you just can't help but wonder what she's doing when she's away for long periods of time.
until it comes to her death.
now, you eventually find out that she died from a close friend of hers, but he knows paku doesn't want you to know about the troupe, so, he's a bit vague, and a bit creepy.
--
nobunaga
personally out of everyone else, i feel like nobunaga would be other most normal when it comes to relationships, but then again, he's an enigma, he doesn't strike me as the type to be the best boyfriend literally ever or very very toxic, i feel like out of everyone else, if you're looking for someone to be in a semi normal relationship with, nobunaga is your best shot, but of course, he's a part of the phantom troupe, and any member apart of it isn't exactly the best partner by default.
he's still a murder and thief, like all members i believe that he would definitely steal things that remind him of you, he'd most definitely kill for you.
unlike someone like feitan or machi, he doesn't exactly have a problem with being vulnerable when you get to know him, he'll tell you about himself, and of course, because he's a criminal he can't exactly tell you what he does for a living, but can't bring himself to lie about it either, he's just hoping that one day, if you know, you won't leave or judge him for it, his childhood isn't exactly all sunshines and lolipops, y'know?
he'll love you from the ends of the earth, but he definitely won't let you walk all over him, quick to put your in your place and won't allow you to manipulate him, he won't lie to you (about trivial things, at least) so why should you? (who knows, maybe you're apart of a criminal organization and is pretty much a wanted criminal yourself :P)
--
bonolenov
similar to nobunaga i think if you want something that's somewhat normal, bonolenov is also a nice choice! (100% not putting him up so high because we don't really know that much about him it's totally because he would be a decent partner! honest!)
for one, you would definitely be introduced to usual romantic gestures and advances that come from his tribe, he'll tell you all about how things work with him, he'll do dances he learned when they were still here for you to show how much he adores you, and dresses you in garments that resemble such from his tribe, it's pretty cute, honestly!
now, what concerns him a bit is.. how you'll react without his bandages, he's not exactly sexy like chrollo but (to me, TO MEEEEEE) he's not the ugliest thing in the world! he just hopes that eventually if you see him in his true form, you don't scream and run away at the sight of him, its okay if you do! ..... kind of.
and if you don't, oh you'll mean so much to him!
--
kortopi
now, here's another one we don't know much about! but i'll try my best either way (i just want to contribute to the lack of attention him and bono get in these spaces.) he's another somewhat normal one, he also doesn't strike me as the type to be the absolute worst, but still is apart of a troupe of murderers and thieves.
similar to everyone else, he'll steal and kill for you (idk if this guy even has a body count but lets pretend he does.) and is a lot more open to being vulnerable than some other members.
now, nine times out of ten you'll be taller than him because this guy is even shorter than feitan, so, he'll definitely be wearing your t-shirts and hoodies, and he ain't complaining about it!
and eventually, he dies, now, honestly, something told you that kortopi seemed... like the odd one out when it came to the troupe, he doesn't seem like the type to be apart of... that! you better hope that hisoka doesn't care about you, or things are gonna turn ugly faster than you can blink.
--
uvogin
he's big (as hell), but he's sweeter (you know why they're in bold italics) than the others twice his size.
physically the strongest, you're rather lucky to have him has your partner, if someone won't stop messing with you, they're dead within a millisecond, or at least scared off since you know.. he isn't exactly built like the average guy and having someone that's eight foot fucking two walking up on you not really excited to see you is quite terrifying, depending on his mood they'll sometimes get away.... sometimes.
enough of that, how is it like when it's just the two of you? sitting on the couch or laying in bed watching movies together, his arm around you, it's basically a pillow! a hard ass pillow at that.
not the most vulnerable, he's not some weird incel who see's women as sex toys or anything, he's decently capable of being in a normal relationship, you won't see each other often sadly, but when you do, he'll pay 95% of his attention towards you, he'll even let you know straight up that he won't know when he'll get back, but he will! ... until he doesn't..
ah yes, his death at the hands of kurapika, how will you react? hell, how would kurapika react to your existence? something tells me that kurapika might kill you too, send you right off with him, or, in a rather strange twist of events, he might try to fuck you and take you to the other side, not in the way of barging into your house and straight up non con, nah, more like a get to know you then get in your pants type of way, uvo won't be there to protect you now would he? of course the latter is highly unlikely, but to be honest it's kind of fun to think about.
and now that you think of it... you don't even know what uvo was doing or where he was going, you choose how you want to react to how you found out about his troupe business.
--
shizuku
another woman! she's similar to another person right below her! she looks cute, but she's anything but!...... sort of.
she's not the best or worst partner, she's pretty normal, a bit distant but it's not something you can't manage, maybe she just needs some space and you're overwhelming her, but something that really gets to you is her forgetfulness.
at first, she'll forget things such as your birthday or your anniversary, but going further into the relationship, she becomes less and less forgetful (she might even remember things that you don't even remember.)
what exactly do you guys do together? well, she does try to partake in your interests, and does try to get things you like!
--
franklin
he's similar to uvo, he's big, he's actually nicer than he appears.
what makes him so low is.. well to be honest i don't know, i don't feel like he could be high up but not so low, so, this is the perfect spot for him.
for one he does have a bit of an anger problem, not as bad as phinks, but he doesn't mind a slight argument, good thing he wont assault you, and is quick to make up for the argument.
i don't know how to write him, so, please forgive me for how small this passage is. :(
--
shalnark
we're starting to get into uh... strange territory, he looks kind, and seems normal, but he's anything but that, he's not the most toxic but he also isn't the most caring and understanding either, similar to nobunaga he's kind of an enigma.
he's a love bomber and very good at manipulating, definitely takes advantage of his rather cute looks, he'll figure out what you're insecure about and compliment those things specifically, i do think he is capable of loving someone genuinely, but he sometimes does things without realizing that they aren't really normal, maybe he's getting his troupe personality mixed up with the one he has with you.
he does come off as sweet at first, brings you flowers and takes you on some rather expensive dates (an uncanny feeling creeps up on you about how the waiters act, but you don't pay much attention to it.) and sometimes he's more distant and a little bit aloof, you take this as him needing his space.
he's not abusive, but he isn't the absolute best partner, there's definitely better out there.
his death doesn't hit you as hard as the others but it was still devastating, you best hope hisoka doesn't come for you, and if he does, you hope he swiftly kills you, because you really don't want this murder clown to take an interest to you.
--
phinks
phinks is another one 'that's kind of odd to me, i don't want to judge a book by its cover and say "yeah he's a piece of shit!!" but again, he's a lot better in comparison to anyone below.
he's similar to shalnark in quite a few ways, one, he does things that kind of makes you think he's a bit of an odd ball, he's intimidating to look at and is the second strongest physically in the troupe, so you're lucky to have someone like him if you're looking for protection.
i don't see him as the type to take you out to fancy restaurants and bring you flowers, stuff like that is a bit too sappy for him, he shows other ways like giving you thinks you like or taking you to like carnivals or other fun events.
his main problem is his anger issues, he won't physically harm you especially if you don't use nen, but he's not above arguing with or yelling at you, he doesn't do it often, but he might call you an idiot or a bitch if you take him to that point.
the relationship is somewhat normal besides that.
--
chrollo
chrollo is weird, some say he's loving, caring, blah blah blah while some might say he's the exact opposite.
for one he is charming, he's a relatively good looking man, he's intelligent, and is looking for someone who's also intelligent.
i feel like chrollo definitely has a type, he likes people who are elegant, he wants someone that'll make him look good while he's in public, he doesn't care much for how people view the relationship outside of that, he also looks for someone with a personality he doesn't want someone who looks good yes, but is boring to be around, someone he can have a deep conversation with and talk about his interests with.
for one, you will not know about the troupe's existence, until he is 100% ready to tell you, which will definitely take a while, but he's confident that the troupe and himself will protect you from anyone who tries to avenge.
now, what makes him so low on this list? well, he's quite manipulative, a gaslighter, too, what do you mean you saw me with another woman? it's all for business, i'm just trying to steal her nen ability.
he does want to be a good partner, but this relationship is kind of a "too good to be true" type, something is happening behind closed doors and the thought is too persistent to ignore.
--
illumi
this guy is... strange, for one, his beady ass eyes make him look like a bug (affectionately), and section.. his very warped perception of what love even is.
i agree with the fandom that he has a breeding kink no doubt, his intention on dating is marriage, and you will bear his children, no ifs, ands or buts.
you'll meet his family but you'll never meet the troupe, he doesn't want you getting involved in fighting (he might have someone teach you some basic self protection) because he doesn't want you to die, that'll fuck with him... kind of, you're basically trapped in the mansion.
his overprotection is toxic on its own, you don't have that much freedom, you can't go shopping unless he's with you (or if he can't be there, one of his servants will accompany you), you're never truly alone unless he's away, and when he's here, things are no better, he's distant and cold, there's not much to talk about with him, sure, he loves you, but doesn't know how to express it much.
--
machi
one out of three toxic ass individuals, one of them consists of machi.
lets start off with the fact that she's cold hearted, as hell, if you cry in front of her she'll look at you like you're crazy, if she's really in that mood she'll tell you that you look stupid and you need to suck it up.
not good with physical touch or romance, who knows how the two of you managed to continue the relationship, she does leave flowers for you but won't tell you that they're from her, won't admit that she's the one who got them for you.
i feel like similar to a certain clown, she won't care much for you if you aren't either powerful or capable of protecting yourself in some way.
but all she's really doing is putting up barriers, she's actually caring in her own weird way, she'll still be there for you, patch up your wounds if you managed to get cut or stabbed and would probably mourn your death.
--
hisoka
were getting lower, and a certain sadist who loves torture is worse, but somehow, hisoka is slightly better than him in some way or another.
for one, hisoka probably won't be that interested in you if you aren't powerful, it would be worse if you were a regular civilian, he'll take that as an opportunity to take advantage of you sexually, physically, psychologically and mentally, and the relationship will be literal hell..
but, lets say you are pretty powerful, dare i say a troupe member yourself, he won't be as interested in fighting you as much as he would chrollo, but he would be interested in... other ways.
how you managed to get into a relationship with this freak is unclear, but you two one day just.. hooked up, and it all goes downhill from here.
he has no problem killing you if he gets tired of you, he already killed two and plans on killing the rest of the spiders, why not kill another? especially you? or, in an alternate scenario where he does manage to kill off all the spider, you're the only one who's left, this can go two ways, one, he can fuck you one last time then kill you, or, he takes you with him! if you managed to have a lasting impression on him, that is.
outside of sex, he just isn't a good partner, he's probably the only one on this list that's probably willing to cheat on you (don't you dare get back at him, both you and your lover will die) he's manipulative as hell, he doesn't necessarily care about how you feel and he'll provoke you just to get a reaction out of you.
--
feitan
and last but not least, feitan, oh boy, good luck to you for managing to have this man attracted to you. (im a feitan girlie, so this one might be a big longer than the rest)
for one, he'll hate your rotten guts for making him feel this way, for making him feel so weak, so emotional... he might even contemplate on killing you, but when that time comes he can't bring himself to do it.
i don't want to say yandere is his default since he doesn't really know how to properly love, because i do think he has some potential, but it does make sense for him, because there has to be something about you that makes you interested in him, maybe you're his polar opposite? maybe you're also a sadist?
he's not the most romantic partner, he doesn't want to come off as vulnerable, or sappy, so, what considers as a date to him? he's the type to probably take you to a cemetery at night as a form of a date.
he will not allow the troupe to know you or you to know them, for one he's going to be teased from hell and back for finally managing to pull someone and second while it appears that he doesn't care for you much, him protecting you from them is his way of showing you that he cares.
he can't find himself being vulnerable, he might teach you his language if you're up for it, and he might bring you some things he knows you like, but thats kind of it, also he won't force you to see him torture people.. unless you betray him in a way.
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she-lovesmovies · 1 year ago
Text
Sodo × fem!reader
She/her reader
Words count: 2 486
Summary: You have a fight with Sodo and he gives you the silent treatment after that.
Warnings: hurt/comfort, angst/fluff. She throws up at some point but it's short and not details. She also eat less for a short time so TW for ED.
Notes: English is not my first language so some lines may be grammatically incorrect, + typos, sorry.
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(Pic coming from Pinterest)
"Mountain I don't know what to do. I feel like he doesn't want to talk to me. At first I understood: he's angry, l'm not gonna talk to him, l'm gonna wait. But it's been hours and I really feel like we need to talk about it... "
"Honestly, I personally don't think what you did was that bad. He's just annoyed by anything and everything. You should try to talk to him."
"Ok..? You sighted.
Rain was looking at you, shaking his head no.
But what could you do, really?
You had walked on his guitar and broke two of the buttons. Not just broke in the he could put them back on way, but you had crushed them.
You couldn't even remember how it happened.
But you remembered how Sodo had looked at you.
How the atmosphere of the room had instantly changed. For the long time you had been with Sodo, or hang out with him, you had never felt that.
It was your fault, clearly. You knew your boyfriend was always leaving his things on the floor so you should have been careful.
After your initial shock, you had fall to your knees and tried to put the pieces back. But he had harshly told you to leave the room. You had quickly complied. And he hadn't talk to you since the incident.
You hadn't even had the chance to apologize...
You trusted Rain. But you had to talk to Sodo.
————————————————
So here you were, in front of his door.
"Sodo ?"
You knocked on the door and opened it. Discreetly walking inside.
He was sitting on the floor, his back to you. His ears and head twitching at the sound of your movements.
His tail was moving violently.
He looked like an animal.
"Sodo ? It's me….. Ijust wanted to say l'm sorry."
"Get out." He growled.
Ok.
So it was gonna be a hard one.
"Sodo, I'm really sorry, can we talk about this ?"
"What about ? You broke my guitar. I won't be able to play it. That's it. Get out.?
"I'm not getting out until you're looking at me. You're clearly not well and I'm not leaving you like this."
He angrily turned around and looked at you dead in the eyes.
He wasn't wearing his mask so you could see his eyes. And now you knew why they were ghouls. Why people thought of them as demons.
"And why would I want you being the one to help me?"
"Because I'm your girlfriend…..?" You answer quietly, forced to look at the floor under his cold scary gaze.
He laughed sadistically and you knew it had been the wrong thing to say and you were both gonna get hurt now.
" You're just a girl I fuck and hang out with. I could do it with any other siblings or sisters. Do you think you have anything special? Because right now apart from breaking my guitar, you didn't do much around here."
He doesn't mean it.
You knew he didn't mean it.
He is just angry.
He loves you.
You knew he did.
After everything you went through together.
But it still hurt.
"You don't mean it. You're just angry.."
"Just angry? Just angry? I could fucking kill you right now! don't know why i'm not doing it. Probably because my brothers would murder me after that. But trust me I would fucking rip you apart if I could. You're fucking useless in the clergy. Copia is being nice to you because that's who he is. He doesn't care about you. I don't care about it."
"No, you don't mean it..." your lips started shaking.
"I- mean- every-words- I- said." He articulated.
At this point your whole body was trembling.
"Stop fucking trembling. It's pissing me off!" He harshly said before turning back to his broken guitar.
"Sorry." you muttered.
He doesn’t mean it.
He doesn't mean it.
He doesn't mean it.
He doesn't mean it.
Both of you didn't say anything for the next two minutes.
It can't end on this.
This conversation can't end like that.
How can I arrange it ?
How can I fix his guitar?
"Sodo, tell me what should I do...?"
You could hear the tears in your own voice.
You knew his guitar was the thing he loved the most in this whole world.
He always had play with this guitar since he stopped being a bassist.
"Fucking leave me alone and don't talk to me again. I don't want to see your face."
You couldn't just stop talking to him.
Or hang out with him.
Did that mean you both were nothing now.
"Are you breaking up with me ?" You ask with a quiet voice.
He didn't answer.
You were in the wrong.
He had every right to not talk. He had asked you to leave him be and you were in the wrong.
So you turned around, defeated, and walked out of the door.
You were in the wrong.
He didn't answer...
——————————————-
4 days had passed since your fight with Sodo.
You both hadn't talk to each other.
You were trying to reach him but he just kept avoiding and ignoring you.
You had heard from Aether that he was in the studio, talking with Copia.
So you ran to them, knowing he couldn't avoid you if he was talking with Copia.
You entered the studio.
Copia glanced at you but Sodo kept talking not acknowledging you or the sound you made.
He probably heard or smell you coming.
"Sodo...”
The ghoul kept on going on.
Copia looked at you, then Sodo.
"Sodo. Please can we talk ?"
No answer.
“Sodo answer me !” You yelled.
Copia looked at you and opened his mouth to say something to Sodo but the ghoul was faster.
"We can keep this conversation elsewhere if you're distracted Papa."
Copia looked like he didn't know what to do.
The silence grounded itself in the room.
“Please talk to me." You whispered, your voice shaking.
Silence again.
Then Sodo started talking with Copia again, who clearly wasn't listening but just looking at you with pity, extending his hand toward you to reach you.
“My dear maybe if...”
Tears rolled down your face and you whimpered just before running out of the room.
You were embarrassed.
Being treated like that in front of Papa.
Being treated like you were nothing.
Like you were useless and didn't exist.
You arrived to your bedroom and locked yourself into your bedroom.
You ran to your bathroom and toilet.
You started throwing up.
Your mouth and throat were sour because of the vomit.
But the way Sodo treated you had triggered some background traumas you had.
You've been through similar things in middle school.
You had to endure those type of behaviors from people you loved.
And it had leave the child you were, traumatized by some specific things.
You couldn't help the way your body was reacting.
And for the next 3 weeks, you had been throwing up every night.
After your duties. After all the pressure was gone. Your body was letting it all go.
But it hurt you.
Your stomach, your throat, your head was hurting you.
Your whole body was exhausted by throwing up for hours. So after the first week you started eating less to vomit a little less food.
Your body kept trying to vomit something and it hurt, but it wasn't as painful as when you were eating.
You also had sleeping problems because of that. It was not often that you were throwing up in the middle of the night and apart from thinking too hard about everything that was going on, you frequently were woke up by nightmares.
You had learned from Rain that Sodo's guitar had been fixed a week ago. You were glad. But the silent treatment kept going on. And honestly it was almost like you had accept it, it pained you everytime you saw him, but you were getting use to it. It didn't mean you were more happy. Getting use to it didn't arrange anything. You still felt miserable. Wandering in the corridors, doing your tasks like a ghost, you still felt useless.
Right now, you were trying to eat your breakfast. The only meal you had everyday.
Thinking about what you could do today.
You knew how it was gonna go: you were gonna go to your bedroom, lay in your bed, start thinking about Sodo, about your relationship, about everything you did, about how you did the same as when you were young, about your last relationships, about how in the wrong you were. About how apart from the guitar you were just a pain in the ass and uninteresting.
About how you knew Sodo was stubborn but if he really loved you he couldn't avoid you for that long.
About how he had always been right: he was saying the truth and didn't want you.
And you would throw up, and cry. And wish someone was there, but at the same time wished no one would see you like that, and wished to only disappear and die.
"Y/n. I know you want and need some time alone, but we're really worried about you.."
You didn't dare to look at Mountain while eating your cereals.
"Hm."
"He's right, you don't look good." Agreed Swiss.
"So that's why you all decided to sit with me this morning? Then that's really kind of you, for once, to sit with me. But don't worry I'II be able to achieve my duties. So you can tell Copia to stop sending his ghouls because whatever my mood and state I'll do my job. I don't want to get thrown out of the clergy."
You stood up from your chair and took your bowl.
But before you had the chance to walk away, Mountain's tail grabbed your forearm.
"Y/n, you need to talk to him.” Mountain muttered.
You started laughing hysterically.
"He's been giving me the silent treatment for 5 weeks. At this point he just doesn't want me in his life. Plus, last time you told me talk to him and look how greatly it went. It's okay. I fucked up. It was stupid of me to think he cared and loved me. You all don't have to pretend. I’ll just stop annoying everyone."
Cumulus tried to speak:
"Y/n it's not what we-“
You didn't let her finished as you took your forearm back and quickly walked out of the cafeteria.
"We need to do something. Sodo is fucking up all the rehearsals and she clearly is not doing well?”
"I don't care about the fucking rehearsals Aether. She's gonna kill herself if she keeps going on like this." Said Mountain.
"We need to talk some fucking sense in Sodo's ego and brain." Agreed Cirrus.
——————————————-
You were in your room.
In your bed.
Under your white sheets.
Your head below your pillow.
Your head was hurting you so bad.
You didn't know if the pillow was suppose to take the pain away, to cut yourself from the outside world, or just suffocate yourself to die instantly.
The tinnitus in your ears was so loud you didn't hear your door opening.
"Y/n.."
You groaned. Still deaf from the person entering.
"Y/n, it's me, Sodo."
You were on the verge of passing out.
The bucket for throwing up next to your bed was almost full.
You didn't know why tonight was that bad.
"Talk to me, please?
Sodo thought it was only fair that you were giving him the silent treatment back, after what he did to you. But he couldn't stop himself from getting worried at the sounds leavingg your body.
He rushed to your bed when he clearly heard cries.
He pulled the sheets and you shriek.
You curled on yourself even more than before, as if trying to protect you.
Sodo took in the sigh of you.
You were pale.
Really pale.
It looked like you hadn't eat for days.
He kneeled next to the bed, where your face was now resting and caressed it.
"Y/n open your eyes."
You shook your head and he stood up, just to sit on your bed and tried to pull you up so you were sitting.
You were just limbs and as you sat up, your head fell past his shoulder. Your chin resting on it as your chest was laying on his.
"Sodo." you finally whimpered.
You had recognized him.
"Yeah, it's me darling."
"You're talking to me." She sobs.
And Sodo’s heart couldn’t hold it anymore.
It broke on itself and tears started to well up in his eyes.
And a sudden wave of immense sadness and pain washed over him.
He was overwhelmed by sorrow.
It took him a second to realize it was your pain he was feeling.
His arms encircled you and he hugged you like he had never hug anyone.
"I'm so sorry. l'm so sorry. I was being immature. It was never your fault. For anything. I let my guitar lay around. I was an asshole to get angry at something so stupid. It was just buttons. I didn't mean anything I say. Please believe me. I love you. I love you so much. Please."
You closed your eyes from relief.
Your head was still hurting you like hell therefore the need to vomit was starting to vanish.
But then your mind reminded you of those past 3 weeks.
"Why? Why did you do that to me? For 3 weeks. You're lying. You don't love me.."
You tried to get out of his embrace but you were just too weak.
"I'm sorry. I was angry at myself. And then I thought you would never forgive me. That you were just better without someone so immature. I'm so sorry. I don't want our relationship to get toxic. l'll never do that to you again. I'm so sorry. l've never been more miserable. Please come back."
You cried even harder as you heard Sodo's own cries.
"I don't know. I don't know. I'm so tired Sodo. I love you so much. But right now I'm too tired to think."
"Okay, okay don't worry darling. I brought you some biscuits so you can eat and then we'll just lay down and talk about all this tomorrow. Do you want me to go ?”
"Please. Stay. I need you to hold me."
Sodo nodded. He didn't loose his grip on you as you both laid down on the bed.
He hugged you from behind.
"I love you so much. I'm so sorry. So sorry." He sobs quietly.
"I know Sodo." whispered as your mind drifted into unconsciousness.
The ringing in your ears had stopped.
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pet-pet-peet · 1 year ago
Note
For the 100 follower event can i request the pocky game hcs like the dorm leaders but with the vice dorm leaders this time? If thats okay
👉👈
I’m very down, vice dorm leader requests = bat daddy requests Story: When visiting you in your world, you introduce him to pocky and say you have to play the pocky game since it’s pocky day! * This is female reader, but I generally don’t use many gendered terms in my writing..just know that I’ll opt more for feminine ones if I add any (aka, probably good for anyone, but the occasional gendered term will be female) Tw: lots of kissing and intimacy, Lilia's is a bit spicy as always, ORTHO IS INVOLVED BUT HIS HAS NONE OF THE PREVIOUS THINGS MENTIONED HIS IS WHOLESOME AND PLATONIC AND THERE IS NO PHYSICAL TOUCH INVOLVED
Pairing(s): Trey, Ruggie, Jade, Jamil, Rook, Ortho (platonic I promise), Lilia x female reader playing the pocky game (separate)
𝕿𝖗𝖊𝖞
He’s heard of something like pocky before, but he’s never tried making some
Probably asks if you want to make some with him so you two can try it out and see how it goes; ends up being pretty fun!
After making sure they tasted okay, you told him about the pocky game and it had him curious, he asks you to tell him more
After your explanation, he smiles kindly and asks if you want to play it
You both bite your respective ends and muffle a “three..two..one!” Thus, the race begins
As you almost reached the halfway mark, Trey took a big bite and beat you to it, looking at you with a mischievous gaze
Your pouting only made him feel more accomplished, and he quickly agreed to a rematch
You put a piece of pocky between you both and continue the rematch
This time he got as close as he could before pulling back suddenly and laughing a bit, saying you won
Every turn after is a mixed bag of reactions from him, but he definitely keeps you on your toes
𝕽𝖚𝖌𝖌𝖎𝖊
This little shit- don't expect anything fair..
He's honestly not too interested in the idea of a pocky game, he doesn't think you should play with food
That said, he did get kind of curious when you explained it to him
He would agree to only one round, but he wouldn't do anymore (for free)
You put the pocky between you both and both of you bite down on your respective ends
Then no one moves- you both just stare at each other while holding pocky between
You decide you'll go for the kill, but figure out you actually can't move
Ruggie laughs at your puzzled expression
He uses his unique magic to just make you give him the stick of pocky and he eats it quickly before you could do anything
Pecks your lips before getting up and leaving with the rest of the pocky
𝕵𝖆𝖉𝖊
You ask if he's ever had pocky, to which he says he's heard of it but never had it
You then make a terrible mistake by asking it he wants to try it by playing the pocky game
You have his curiosity, so he asks you to explain the roles; he listens intently with a calm smile
He requests that you demonstrate what you're meant to do, his smile grew as if he was talking about his beloved mushrooms
You go ahead and set the game up between you two
You start taking slow bites towards the center, but notice that Jade's not moving at all
He stayed like that for a bit longer, just watching you chew closer and closer
At some point, he puts his head on your chin and gently pull you closer, giving you a short kiss
He smiles innocently when you pull away, saying he thought it was an interesting game and that you two should play more
Sits silently like a menace as he "innocently" watches you stumble over yourself
𝕵𝖆𝖒𝖎𝖑
He doesn't usually have much time for games, or himself..or you for that matter-
But anytime he can be around you, he wants to make sure you're satisfied
Kind of concerning, between worrying about Kalim's need and worrying about your needs he doesn't seem to have much time for himself
So you decided that this would be a good way for him to let loose a little
You both sat under a tree, his head laying on your lap as you both shared a box of pocky
You asked him to just hold one in his mouth, so he did while looking at you with curiosity
He lowkey got flustered when you leaned closer and ate at the pocky, he almost choked on it, but he kept in that position
You made it to his lips and kissed him sweetly, he returned the gesture but was a bit confused on your approach with it
You told him he should have more time to just be, and not have to worry about satisfying people
He was slightly embarrassed about being called out, but he let you take care of him a bit more afterwards
𝕽𝖔𝖔𝕶
He was on board as soon as you mentioned that there was a game
No hesitation, he put a pocky in his mouth without even hearing the rules
When you asked if he wanted to know them, he shook his head and stared at you expectantly
He watched as you started to eat the pocky, but he didn't move
When you were about to touch his lips you pulled back, which confused him
You laughed at his thoughtful reaction and proclaimed victory, making him think even more
In the end he just laughed and congratulated you for your victory
Endless praises as he asks in a chivalrous way for a rematch, which you accept
It essentially was the same as the first round, which made you feel a bit bad since in your mind he clearly didn't understand the rules
Head went empty when he pulled you into a kiss before you were able to back away, though
𝕺𝖗𝖙𝖍𝖔
He noticed you always talk about pocky with Idia, so he found a way to make some for you!
Brought out his (slightly burnt) homemade pocky sticks during one of your binge nights with him and his brother
You ate them regardless of their faults, but felt a bit bad that Ortho couldn't indulge in his creation too
So you asked him and Idia if they wanted to play a game with the pocky!
Idia was a bit on the fence but asked for you to explain the rules
You distributed an even amount of pocky to each of you, saying that whoever makes the best creation (via Magicam poll) with the limited amount of pocky in 30 minutes wins
Both brothers seemed interested, so you set the timer and all of you rushed to stack pocky pieces
It wasn't the easiest, since pocky didn't exactly like to stay in the positions you put it, but you gave it your all
Ortho had the advantage, as he could use a small laser to melt the chocolate enough to stick them together
Magicam agreed, as Ortho's cute little pocky cabin got majority of the votes
𝕷𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖆
He was incredibly curious about pocky since it's not something he's experienced
In all his travels, never once had he heard of it, so trying the snack from your world was something he was very invested about
Especially with how much you seemed to gush about it
As you pulled a box out and toward him, he noticed a cute slyness twinkle in your eyes, and you mentioned a game
He asked for the rules, so he knew what he was getting into; it was inevitable that he'd accept the challenge
He made sure to run his fingers over your scalp and behind your ear, attempting to fluster you as you took your positions
Otherwise he played fair for the round
Playing fair doesn't mean going easy, he gave it his all and it payed off
He won and gave you a celebratory kiss
You probably don't play anymore rounds after, he'd rather take the intimate opportunity to make out with you
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purplekissinger · 11 months ago
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Hungry heart
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Your yandere is the 'hide the zombie bite' type of guy. 
TW: yandere themes, disease themes (if that makes you nervous please proceed with caution. I personally wrote this to cope with fear of zombie virus). Angst at first, wholesome then. Also my english is hrr drr eww.
‘I bet my ass you were bitten,’ you said coldly.
One couldn’t look at Michael without tears. From the very morning he looked… unwell. He clearly had a fever, and a strong one; despite this, he did his best to cheer you up and even tried to make awkward jokes, but when he thought you weren’t looking, he would quickly roll up the sleeve of his sweater and look at his wrist anxiously. His (more so than usual) erratic behavior made it straight up obvious. You put two and two together easily and played along with him for a while, but honestly? All this would be charming if it weren't lethal.
It seemed impossible for Michael to blush any more than he already was, and yet he managed.
‘Biten?! What do you mean?’ his nervous laughter turned into a strained cough, but he immediately pulled himself together. ‘It's because of the flu, right? Y/N, I swear, I’m just a bit under the weather. Yesterday it was terribly cold…’
‘In the middle of July?’ you raised an eyebrow. ‘By the way, since when do you wear sweaters in the summer?’
‘I love this sweater, after all, you gave it to me!’ Michael exclaimed passionately. Well, at least that was true. ‘Our 32nd date, remember?’ he added dreamingly. 
‘Don’t change the subject, Michael, you’re being ridiculous,’ said you tiredly. That was hell of a night, with him, covered in cold sweat, restless and moaning, clinging to you like there's no tomorrow (and there probably wasn't). ‘Please, show me your arm. Just let me see the bite and be over it.’
Michael hid his arm behind the back quickly and forced a smile. He never was a good liar. 
'Y/N, honey, you h-have to believe me,' he choked on his own words with another cough, much stronger this time, and that cough was louder than words. When he could breathe again, you looked straight into his eyes, and whatever he read on your face made him let out a small sob.
“Michael,” you said with an unusual harshness in your voice. If he chose to be a little whiner, you should have taken responsibility for you two. “I'm literally traveling through abandoned cities with my crazy stalker who just won't shut up about how exactly he was obsessing over me before the zombie apocalypse. Is there anything else left that we are hiding from each other?”
He shook his head, unable to speak.
“Was that a yes or no?”
“No,” Michael whispered and, with a gesture full of despair, hid his burning face in his hands. His shoulders shuddered slightly.
You took a small step forward and reached your hand forward as if to comfort him.
“Michael,” you whispered. “Michael, hush, please.”
He peeked at you through his fingers with both horror and hope. You finally placed your hand on his shoulder and gently stroked it.
“Hush, no need to twitch. Unlike someone, I don’t bite,” you smiled weakly. And at that moment he finally lost it and burst into tears in full force. You held him tightly, hugging him with all your strength, feeling his fever rise and knowing that even now you would never leave him. Especially now.
* * *
“I thought you were above the “hiding a zombie bite” trope,” you joked awkwardly as you bandaged Michael’s arm with a clean cloth. At this point it wouldn't help him any more than a bar of chocolate, but at least he'd spend this day as a human being and not as a scared abandoned pet.
“I am, in fact,” he said and gave you a small smile. “Would it be any other group of survivors, I wouldn’t hide it.”
"Oh?!" you poked his shoulder playfully. “Do you particularly hate me or what?”
"No, not at all!" he said quickly. His mood seemed to have changed for the better now. “Not at all, Y/N, really. I... just don't want this to end. I don’t want us to end.”
He definitely needed painkillers. You turned to the cabinet where the medications were kept.
"Explain yourself."
“Everything... Absolutely everything was going so perfectly,” Michael said sadly. “You and I are finally together, alone in the whole world. Everything was as I always dreamed. You have only me, I have only you, no one and nothing can separate us and we will never part. It was heaven. I just didn't want this to end. Not now, not ever. Y/N, I swear, I have never been happier than during the zombie apocalypse.”
“My friend, you're not right in the head,” you rolled your eyes.
He grinned. “Tell me something I don't know. But really, I was utterly happy all this time. Were you?" he looked up at you.
“You can be funny sometimes,” the corner of your mouth twitched.
“Was funny,” he sighed. “I think this is how we should say it now.”
“No, this isn’t,” you said sternly. “Open your mouth now and drink this. That's it, good boy. What if you come back as a friendly zombie?”
Michael laughed in disbelief. “It doesn’t work that way,” he said. “No matter how much I adore you now, I will forget everything very soon. I'll be just as dead as before I met you, only… deader. Although, of course, the thought of eating you has always been tempting...”
“You’re terrible,” you snorted. "No, seriously though. I’m positive that something will remain? You may not be able to learn nuclear physics, but you will remember at least something, and, of course, I will help you with this.”
The meaning of your words did not reach him right away. Then Michael shook his head furiously.
“Y/N, no,” he said pleadingly. “Don't even think about it. It's too dangerous."
"Why not?" you shrugged. If he chose to be a little whiner, all you have left was to save both of you. “We’ll find you a nice collar and gag. Would you prefer it pink or black?”
“This is not a joke,” he protested, and then he realized that you weren’t joking.
…You sat there, hugging each other, thinking about tomorrow with horror, but also with hope.
“Promise me,” Michael whispered. “I don’t care if it’s pink or black, but it should have a “Y/N's Personal Property” tag.’
You kissed his cheek tenderly.
"Promise".
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h-c-u · 2 years ago
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Uncertainty
Summary: You're a 3rd driver for the Mercedes team, in a secret relationship with the team principal and you fill in for Lewis during the race. The car malfunctions, you completely lose control over the steering and can't avoid crashing. And it's bad. 
Pairing: Toto Wolff x fem!driver!reader
W/C: 6.1k
Rating: M. Car crash, talk about injuries and surgeries.
TWs: Car crash, near death injuries
A/N: I swear to gods, my mood when it comes to writing changes so quickly -,- It's dark, sad, and heavy. Also - like 90% of the fic is happening when the reader is in surgery, but the idea just dug it's claws into my brain and didn't want to let go.
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- Bono, something's wrong with the steering, there is a slight delay in response, and I'm unable to predict how much I should correct. - you were honestly getting scared. You didn't want to lose the 5th position, especially this late in the race. You knew yourself well enough that you could get at least 3rd before the end, but not with a car that behaved like that. 
- I'm running the diagnostic now to see if we'll be able to do something about it remo... FUCK. CRASH. Be careful. - you instantly felt cold, but it wasn't your first time in a dangerous situation. When Bono told you about the crash, you hadn't seen it just yet, because it was hidden behind a turn, and as soon as you turned...
- Breaks are not working. And I completely lost control over the steering. - everything was happening in slow motion, and you couldn't do anything. There was no fancy "eject" button like in a James Bond movie; you were able to just watch and brace for impact. - Bono. I'm going to crash into them. Don't let me die. - you whispered, tears very slowly gathering in your eyes under the helmet. 
You didn't say another word. You didn't swear, you didn't scream. You knew what was about to happen and somehow you managed to remain calm. You just fastened the straps holding you to the seat even more and held your arms close to your chest. 
You heard people screaming over the comms, familiar voices full of panic and desperation but the one voice you were hoping to hear... wasn't there. So whatever others were saying didn't matter. 
And then you were flying. The nose of your car wedged under someone else, and it sent you into a barrel on the track. You closed your eyes, not to get nauseous, but it was a small comfort, especially when the car turned to its side and continued to barrel toward the wall. How you were able to stay conscious for so long - you weren't sure, but then suddenly... there was nothing. 
- TOTO, NO! YOU CAN'T GO THERE! THERE IS PROTOCOL!
- FUCK PROTOCOL!!! - he was trying his best to get from Bono's and Ricardo's strong arms, but they held him steady and didn't let him run out of the garage.
- Medics and the crew are already at the scene. She will be in the ambulance before you get to that part of the track. - James stepped in front of the man, blocking his way, and put his hand on his boss's chest stopping him from moving any further. No one ever saw Toto this distressed. Sure, he could get angry, but this... This was different. - Calm down and think. 
- I... I can't. - his shoulders slumped and even though he wasn't trashing and trying to get out anymore, his thoughts were galloping at the speed of light, running through every possible scenario. - I just can't... - Bono and Ric loosened their grip on his body and exchanged a worried look with the technical director. - I don't know what to do... - he admitted, his voice completely broken. 
- We're gonna get to the hospital and we'll go from there. - James realized it was his turn to think about everything, and even though he didn't completely understand why Toto reacted this way - he wanted to help in whatever way he could. All of the people in the garage were shaken up, but this... This was new. Toto was oozing fear and desperation from everywhere. His posture, his voice, the frantic look in his eyes... - Toto. - the technical director wasn't sure if his words even reached his friend, but Wolff finally nodded slowly. - Yeah...? - he made sure. 
- Yeah. Hospital. Let's go. - he whispered eventually. He was in no condition to drive, so he let his friend do that. He didn't take his eyes from the view behind the window once, even though he was seeing none of what they were passing. He dug his nails into his knees, bit his lower lip until he drew blood, and tried his best not to break down completely. Not before he knew if you were dead or alive. 
When they arrived at the hospital, Toto didn't even wait for James to park properly, he was out of the car as soon as they reached the entrance. He run into the emergency room and quickly located the admission desk, but before he said anything, he took one last, deep breath. 
- Hello, my name is Toto Wolff. I'm the emergency contact for Y/n Y/l/n. I would like to know in what condition she's in. - his voice was surprisingly calm. Even in such a state, he knew that whatever happened wasn't the nurses' fault and he didn't want to take out whatever he felt on them. 
- I have to confirm your identity first. Can I see your ID? - the old nurse asked, but she was already typing something on the keyboard. Toto frantically patted his pockets in search of a wallet, momentarily mortified, because he got afraid that he left it in his bag, in the garage, but James came to his rescue with said wallet. He quickly fished out his ID and presented it to the nurse. 
- She was admitted about 10 minutes ago and is being prepped for the surgery. She already had a head CT, but there are no results yet. There is also no information about planned procedures. - she explained with a soft tone, even though the news she was sharing wasn't exactly... good. 
- What does it mean...? - Toto asked, fearing the worst. 
- It means there was a head injury and she's unconscious. They don't know exactly what's wrong, but it's serious enough for emergency surgery with neuro, orthopedic and cardiothoracic surgeons. - she added, quieter. Sure, she could have omitted a few facts, but something told her that it would have the opposite effect on the man in front of her. 
- Her... Her heart...? - if he weren’t holding the high counter in front of the admission desk, he would have slumped to the floor. 
- Or lungs. - she clarified. - I'm sorry I can't give you better news... But she's in the best hands in the country. I will ask one of our interns to take you to a waiting room... - she waved at one of the young men, who was currently filling out papers, and quickly told him what to do. - And sir... - she added, just when they were about to leave the area. - It will be a long surgery, but the longer the wait, the better. It means that she's still fighting. - that was the first thing that gave him hope... You were still alive. Still fighting. And you weren't the type of person who easily gave up. 
Toto Wolff was not a religious man. He honestly couldn't remember when was the last time he visited any place of worship, but now... Now he was going through every prayer he knew. He begged every god, every angel, every demon, every saint he could think of, not to let you die, and if that's necessary - to take him instead. Logically he knew that wasn't possible, but he was willing to try everything, no matter how stupid it seemed at the moment.
James left his side only once, to get some shitty coffee from the machine, but it was left untouched in between Toto's feet. He didn't know what to say, what to do... Other people came and went. The pit crew, engineers, other team principals, drivers... A few stayed. Mostly other drivers, and from the closer circle - James, Bono, George... And Lewis - without even saying a word was on a video call with Bono, feeling extremely guilty. 
- Did... - George finally broke the silence. - Did anyone call her family? - he asked, and Toto just clenched his fists. 
- She doesn't have one. - he whispered eventually. - She's an only child and went no-contact with her parents just as she started racing. - he added and the others looked at him trying to hide the surprise. - She will kill anyone who’ll let them know about anything even remotely connected to her life. So as far as things go... she doesn't have a family. - he ended in a harsher tone than he intended and almost immediately sighed. 
He was still in the clothes he was wearing during the race... The track pass was tucked in the pocket on his chest, and the headphones were still around his neck, but he didn't even notice them, and no one in the room dared to say a word. 
Just as three hours passed since they arrived, a young-looking woman called out your last name, and the four men immediately stood up, three with hope, one in fear, because it was much too quick for the surgery to end. 
- Hello, my name is Alex and I'm one of the residents helping with your... - she stuttered for a second, realizing she didn't know the relationship between her patient and the men in the waiting room. - With Y/n's surgery. We were able to stop the bleeding in her brain and remove all the debris lodged there without major issues. The head of neurosurgery is currently reversing all four of the aneurysms, but compared to what we already did - it's the easiest thing. - she started explaining and everyone except Toto sighed with relief. 
- What else...? - he asked, afraid of the further news. - Please tell us everything, no matter how small or ugly. I need to know... - he pleaded, and James put his hand on his boss’s shoulder. There was some hesitation on the young doctor’s face, but eventually, she continued. 
- Eight of her ribs are broken... Two of them were lodged in her right lung and the cardiothoracic surgeon was able to remove one and is working on the second. One pierced her kidney, but due to the positioning... The lungs take priority. Her spinal cord is intact, but three of the lumbar vertebrae are fractured and we will have to realign them later. Her right femur is broken in six places, left in two and our head of ortho is currently working on that. Both of her tibias and feet are by some miracle intact. All the bones in her shoulders, arms, forearms, wrists, and hands are also free of any injuries. She didn't sustain any burns or lacerations because of the suit, which will help during her recovery. - with every word the relief disappeared more and more from the men's faces, and Toto's lips became almost invisible. 
- Her heart...? - he asked eventually. 
- Intact and strong. She's not on any assistance during the surgery, although we're ready for that if the need arises. She's a fighter. - the young doctor added with a gentle smile. 
- You've mentioned her recovery... Does that mean...? - he was afraid to finish the question, especially when he saw Alex's face drop just a little.
- I... I shouldn't have said that. I can't promise you any type of outcome, especially with such severe injuries. - her voice softened. - We know what's wrong. We know how to fix it. And we will do our best to do so. Three of the best surgeons in the country are currently working together to keep her alive, so objectively - the chances of success are high. But I can't promise you that everything will be perfect. – Toto nodded, acknowledging the situation. 
- Thank you for taking the time to explain everything to us. - he whispered, suddenly feeling weak in the knees. - Would it be too much if I asked for an update after every major stage? Doesn't matter if good or bad... I just need to know... - George was the one to notice how shaky Toto truly was, so he helped him sit down, so the man wouldn't fall over. 
- It wouldn't be too much at all. I was planning to do so anyway... But it... - she started, but Wolff cut her off.
- It's gonna be a long surgery, I was told. I will be here. - his voice was stronger than his body, and the young doctor gave him one last smile before she turned around and went back to the operating block. 
None of the men knew what to say, so they just sat in silence, trying to process what has happened. 
There was a moment when George started quietly sobbing, and without even thinking, Toto put his arm around him and pulled him into a hug, trying to give him the comfort he so desperately needed himself. But the only person who could give it to him was currently lying cut open on the operating table. 
- George, you officially got second place with 18 points... - James eventually broke the silence, but none of them were able to say after how long, because time had become something immeasurable. - Congratulations... - he added, but that was the last thing on young driver's mind. Few other drivers in the waiting room took out their phones to check the results, but in the end - there were more important things than that. 
- Holly shit. - someone whispered and almost immediately added. - Y/n crashed after the red flag. She got 5th. With the fastest lap. - all heads turned to Carlos, who was sitting on the floor. Even Toto couldn't believe what he just heard. He knew you were good, damn... He believed in you since day one, that's why he was so quick to sign you. And now... Now Y/n Y/l/n was officially the first woman since 1975 who scored points in F1, which was a historical achievement. 
- She got 11 points... - James confirmed after checking his email once again. And then there was silence again. There should be a celebration, all of them knew that. And even though someone will contest that, because technically you wouldn't be able to finish the race if it were resumed, and your team would fight tooth and nail for that not to be taken away... But for now, in the official FIA statement, you finished in 5th place. 
There were some murmurs and whispers, but none of it mattered to Toto more than you actually living, so when he saw the familiar face of a young doctor again, he almost jumped from his seat. 
- Hello again... - she smiled, which he took as a good sign. - The orthopedic surgeon finished working on her legs and we were able to close them. There was no additional damage to the thigh muscles, so we didn't have to take any part of them, which means that she will be able to regain a full range of movements, in time of course. The neurosurgeon just finished reversing the aneurysms, and the new head CT didn't show any additional injuries, so we will be able to slowly close her skull as well. We were also able to remove the other rib from her lung, and the head of cardio is currently working on repairing her right lung, but we don't know for sure if it is viable, which means... - she stopped for a moment, not sure how the man in front of her would react to such news. 
- That there is a chance you will have to remove it. But she could live with just one lung, right? - he made sure.
- With some restrictions, but yes. 
- Then in the end it doesn't matter. How about her kidney and spine? - he asked, eager to know more. 
- The kidney is being worked on as we speak, but the spine... - she stopped for a moment, trying to find the best words to explain the situation to someone unfamiliar with medical jargon. - The best way to get to the lumbar vertebrae would be from the back, which would require a change of position. And since the injuries on the front of her body are so extensive, the new position might be dangerous for her, so there will be benefits to closing her up, letting the body rest and regenerate for a few days, and proceeding with second surgery later in a week. 
- Wouldn't leaving it as it is, be dangerous as well? I mean - is there a chance of the fragments moving and injuring her spinal cord?
- That's exactly why we haven't decided on the best course of action just yet. We still have to finish working on her kidney, lung, and ribs, while the neurosurgeon assesses which option would be the safest and does more scans to see if going from the front would be possible. It's unconventional, but it has been successfully done. - she explained and Toto nodded. 
- Thank you for explaining that to me... - she just smiled gently and walked away. 
It was the first time he looked at the clock, and it was almost midnight, but he didn't feel that at all. Time was weird, because he felt like the crash had happened just a few seconds ago, and at the same time as if centuries passed since he saw your car barreling down the track. And then he heard an unfamiliar voice calling out your name. He instantly turned around in that direction and saw a medical responder in full gear. She repeated your name once again and Toto finally put his hand up. 
She quickly came closer and sat in front of him.
- Good evening, sir... I was one of the first responders to the crash, and I was responsible for intubating Y/n. - she started explaining, and Toto was too exhausted to ask what it was about, or even to introduce himself. - But before I did that... She was awake for just a moment. And she asked me to pass the message, the problem is... I don't know to whom. - it was like he caught a second wind because he instantly focused on the woman in front of him. 
- What did she say...? - he asked, leaning forward. He knew everyone was listening, but he didn't care. 
- She said... "Why didn't I say it back... Please tell him that I love him." - Toto blinked a few times as if the words had trouble reaching him, but when they finally did... He started to laugh like a maniac, and everyone looked at him in worry that he actually snapped or went crazy.
Earlier today, when you were both just waking up with the first rays of sunshine peeking over the horizon, he said those three magic words for the first time... Three words, eight letters... He didn't expect anything in return, because he knew how hard expressing any emotions came to you, but it was important to him to assure you that he, indeed, loved you and wasn't planning to go anywhere. He also knew that you loved him, because you had your own way of showing that to him... 
So, to hear that when you were convinced you were dying, the last thought in your mind was telling him something he already knew for a while was... a bit absurd. But then it hit him... You did that because you thought that he didn't know you loved him. And your possible last thought was letting him know that you weren't in it just for fun, that you were serious about your relationship. And that made him freeze. 
- Sir...? - the lady in front of him reached to touch him but stopped last second. 
- I'm sorry... I know who that message was for... Thank you for passing it on. - he gave her a weak smile, and she just nodded. - And thank you for what you did for her... It means a lot to me. - he added quieter, and just like that, she was gone. 
The atmosphere in the waiting room was still extremely tense, but that didn't stop a few of the drivers from dozing off. Someone even ordered pizzas, but Toto didn't move... He didn't eat, didn't drink, didn't say anything... He was a shell of himself while his heart was being cut open, stabbed, prodded, and stitched back up on the operating table just a few meters away. 
And while at first people were brushing it off as a team principal caring for his driver, the few closest to him realized that there was more. Finally, Bono had enough and sat right next to him.
- How long...? - he whispered quietly enough that no one else was able to hear. 
- I don't know what... - Toto immediately wanted to deny everything and play stupid, but one look from his friend and he folded. - 5 months... - he said, barely any sound leaving his lips. 
- And the thing the paramedic said...? - he asked, but only got a nod in reply. - Shiiiiiiit... - this time Toto looked at him confused. - I lost the betting pool.
- What? 
- We have... Well, now had... A betting pool because we noticed that you were much happier for quite some time. The most popular option was antidepressants, and I bet on that, not gonna lie. - Toto just blinked a few times, still trying to process what was being said. - There was also a winning streak, therapy, someone you hated dying, that you got laid, but Lewis was the only one that bet on a new relationship. I mean - there were a few more people who bet on the relationship, but Lewis nailed the 5 months. - Toto still couldn't believe what he was hearing, but somehow, the absurdity of the situation helped him relax just a little.
- You make bets... about my private life? - he was genuinely curious if it was the first time. 
- Well... Yeah. Because you're all mysterious and shit. It's easy to make up some crazy stories just for fun. - Bono just shrugged. - None of us suspected that you and her... I mean, in public, you were equally close with... - he stopped and pointed with his chin in the direction of the familiar face in blue scrubs. 
- We were able to save the lung and a kidney. All ribs are secured in their places. - Toto sighed with relief for the first time since he saw the car tumbling on the tracks. - The head of neuro managed to find a way to repair the vertebrae from the front, but it will be a long procedure. The angle he has to go in from is very unusual and taxing, but we will be able to do everything today. Her vitals are stable, her heart is strong... She's doing well, sir. We still don't know the extent of her brain injury, which will have to wait till she wakes up, but we are optimistic that she will. - she smiled softly and gently squeezed his arm. 
- Thank you... - and with that, she was gone again, and Toto looked around the waiting room... It was almost 3 AM, and the surgery started... around 10 hours ago. And yet the whole younger generation of drivers was here, most of them still in gear... Some were on the uncomfortable chairs, some quietly talking, and few even fell asleep on the floor. Even though you were all competitors, and you weren't even a full-seat driver yet, they still respected you and your skills a lot. - Guys, I think you should go back to your hotels and get some sleep... Or just rest... I'll let you know in the morning how the surgery went. - few heads turned in his direction, but no one moved. Lando finally broke the silence. 
- With all due respect sir, she wouldn't leave any of us... - Toto couldn't help but feel... pride. Not just for you, but for them. Just 10 years ago this type of situation wouldn't be possible... After the crash, maybe one or two drivers, who were the closest to the injured one, would be in the hospital, but never for this long... And never this many... They were good kids, and it meant that the times were changing. 
- I can't disagree with that... - he smiled. - Thank you all. - he added and sat right back. Now, that most of your injuries were under control, he let himself think of anything else, and that turned out to be those boys behind him. He quickly wrote a few messages to the other team principals, letting them know where most of their drivers were and asking them to arrange at least a change of clothes, because the majority of them still had sensors under their gear, and that must have been uncomfortable. He also took time to bring every single one of them a cup of that awfully sweet hot chocolate and spent a few minutes talking with them one on one about whatever they needed to get off their chests. And next to being worried about you, most of them were scared... 
It took a while, but he finally came back to his original chair and for the first time - leaned back in it and stretched, but that wasn't near enough for him to release all the tension collected in his body. But now... Now he allowed himself to hope. 
The next time he saw Alex, she was with another doctor, and it was already getting bright outside. All of the drivers - now in regular clothing - were sleeping on each other in different combinations, and only George was awake beside himself. 
- The operation was a success... - she started, and Toto felt as if someone finally took the weight of the whole world from his shoulders, the relief of it forcing tears out of his eyes. - She's already stitched up, and soon we will move her to a recovery room, where you will be able to see her - for the first few hours, just through the glass and then in person. - you lived. That's all that mattered. - She will be in a medically induced coma for at least a few days to prevent her brain from swelling more. We will continue monitoring her, and based on the results we will decide when will be the best time to wake her up. - the young doctor explained and when she looked over the waiting room, she added. - She... She's stable, but she doesn't look well... - the tone of her voice was enough to convey what she really wanted to say. 
- They won't take no for an answer... They will want to see her. - he quietly said. - They look young, well, they are young... It's hard to explain, but they need to see her. They need to see for themselves that she's alive... - Alex looked at the older doctor who gave silent permission. - Thank you for all you did... For saving her...
- I can take you to see her now, but the rest... Groups of 3 the most. - Toto nodded and another sigh of relief escaped his chest. He still couldn't believe what happened. When he saw the crash, he was mentally preparing for the funeral, but now... Now you were alive. Still extremely injured and with months if not years of therapy in front of you, but you were alive. Fuck everything else. 
- Can you give me a minute...? I'd like to tell them myself. - he explained and after getting a quiet “sure”, he went first to Bono and James, who were sleeping in the chairs next to each other, and very quickly explained what he just heard. After that, he went around the room and quietly told everyone else. Some of the younger ones immediately started crying from relief, and he couldn't blame them, because he did the exact same, so he just pulled them into a wordless hug until they calmed down. It definitely took more than a minute, and he felt a bit bad for keeping the young doctor awake, but when he took a quick look in her direction, she smiled at him, letting him know that he can take as long as he needs. This was definitely an unusual situation. 
But eventually, everyone was up to speed, and the atmosphere in the room relaxed a bit. There were even a few awkward laughs, but Toto wasn't there to hear them. He was walking a couple of steps behind the young doctor who was kind enough to update him over the last fifteen hours, and he tried to mentally prepare himself for what he was about to see. You were alive. That's all that mattered. 
It wouldn't be the first time he saw someone after the crash, hell - he was in one himself. Albeit not such a serious one... He was around the track long enough to know that even the nonlethal injuries weren't pretty, he saw what could happen to drivers who either weren't careful, skillful, or lucky enough. But you were definitely careful and skillful enough. But today, well... yesterday. You didn't have enough luck. A mechanical failure. Two of the things that had so many fail-safes, he wasn't sure he could count that high. But somehow all of them failed... He knew there would be an investigation, but that didn't matter. Because you were alive. 
So, when he finally saw you through the thick glass... He broke. He had to hold himself on the metal barrier in front of the window just not to fall over, and the young doctor put his arm under his, trying to assist him until he'd be able to stand straight. You looked so small connected to all the heavy machinery in the room. A thick tube down your throat, a bag of full blood connected to the IV port in your arm, all the cables coming from under the bandages on your chest... The draining tubes coming from under the bandages on your thighs... Your face was swollen, with bruises in multiple places, and your head was shaved and covered in bandages. He couldn't help but laugh at that one detail... You wanted to shave your head for ages but never found the right moment with all the press and photoshoots. 
And your hands... Somehow, they didn't fit the picture... They were pristine, not counting the IVs... No bruises, no bandages, no anything... Your long fingers looked exactly the same as they did this morning when you intertwined them with his, just as he was about to tell you he loves you.
- I'm sorry, it's just... - he started, but he couldn't finish, so he just rested his forehead on the cold glass in front of him, trying so hard not to let tears into his eyes.
- It can be a lot, seeing a loved one like this... I understand... 
- She's alive... - he failed. He tried to convince himself that it was enough, but seeing you like that... So small, so... weak. It hit him. He wouldn't be able to live without seeing you wildly dance on the roof of one of the many hotels you stayed in during the racing season... Without hearing your broken singing from under the shower in the morning... Without your contagious laughter at something stupid, he said... He needed you more than he needed to breathe, and it scared him. 
He wiped the tears with the back of his hand, straighten his posture, and did his best to compose himself. Not for himself, but for the people who were about to see you like that. You lived... and for now that had to be enough. 
He didn't leave your room since he was allowed to enter it for the first time... Sitting at your bed, holding your hand, putting on the music he knew you'd like, reading aloud... And with every passing day, you started looking... stronger. The color started returning to your skin, and the bruising and swelling on your face slowly started healing. The drivers kept visiting you, and when they had to leave to prepare for the next race - they kept sending you gifts. 
Lewis stayed the longest after he finally got well enough to leave his room... He spent the entire day at your side, holding your hand, apologizing profusely, and praying... And after he didn't have any more tears left in him, he started telling you stories he knew you'd love. He was also the one to bring that perfume you bought in Egypt and which you absolutely adored; he put a drop of it behind your ears and on your wrists and left the bottle on the nightstand. 
George was the one to take it the hardest... Even though he tried his best not to show it when he was visiting, Toto knew. He knew how close the two of you were, and all the crazy adventures you shared. You were like siblings on crack and the things you could get into when let out of the bullpen... He honestly couldn't believe that you haven't been arrested yet for some of the stuff you pulled... That's why the last time he visited before leaving the UK, Toto suggested talking to a therapist and George agreed.
It took more than the few days Alex mentioned after the surgery, but the decision to wake you up was finally made a bit over two weeks after the crash. And he felt like a babe in the woods the whole morning; happy that the medication will be out of your system, but afraid of what would happen if you didn't wake up.
Alex was the one who sat with the both of you in the room, watching your vitals like a hawk, and as soon as she saw any change, she explained to Toto what exactly it meant. Around noon, she made the decision to stop intubating you, because it looked like your brain took over that function. She of course was ready with a new tube, just in case, but it ended up not being necessary; even though one of your lungs wasn't fully healed, enough oxygen was getting to your brain. 
Around noon he started to get antsy, but Alex quickly calmed him down and explained again that it might take even a few days because there is no way to tell how your brain would react. It didn't help much, but having someone to answer his every question was a godsend because he wasn't able to think about worst-case scenarios when there was a professional who said otherwise. 
He wasn't able to eat, but he didn't care... He didn't want to miss the moment when you woke up. But the day ended and nothing changed. In the evening one of the other residents took over for Alex, but Toto still didn't move and didn't let go of your hand. Not even when he rested his head on the bed next to your legs for just a moment. But the moment became a bit longer when he closed his eyes...
A familiar sensation woke him up... Long, cold fingers running through his hair, and he couldn't help but smile, at first - not realizing what it meant. But then it hit him. His eyes shot open, and he immediately sat up. 
Your beautiful eyes were open and full of tears, while your hand found his, and squeezed it tightly. 
- You're awake... - he whispered the obvious... - She's awake! Get a doctor here! - he shouted when he realized you two were alone in the room.
You tried to say something, but the words stuck in your throat due to pain.
- Shhh... Don't say anything just yet... You were intubated and the doctors said it might take some time for it to heal... - he said, without even noticing he started crying, but you decided to ignore him; your determination was much stronger than a little bit of pain. Well, ok... More than a little bit. 
- I... - you started, but the rest of the sentence didn't want to come out...
- I love you... And I know you love me too... I have known it for a while now. You never had to say it... I knew... - he said, brought your hand to his lips, and started pressing soft kisses to the back of it. You extended your finger to wipe one of the tears from his cheek, and his other hand quickly followed, wiping the rest. You looked around the room and noticed all the flowers, the teddy bears, the toys... There was even a... Tamagotchi...? And a brand-new Nintendo Switch...? 
You looked back at Toto with a question painted on your face. 
- The other drivers brought most of this stuff... They still keep sending things even though... - you nudged your head forward, urging him to continue. - Even though they had to leave for the next race. The accident was over two weeks ago, I'll explain everything later, I promise... But now the doctors will have to run some tests, ok...? - you nodded in response and shifted your gaze to the doctors that came into the room just a moment ago. They started simple, asking you to follow the light with your eyes and look in certain directions. And you did whatever they asked, not letting go of Toto's hand. 
You were scared and in pain... But somehow you knew everything will be all right, because despite everything - you weren't alone. And that was certain. 
A/N 2: Please don’t feel obligated/pressured to reblog, because I write mostly for myself. A comment would be appreciated though :) Love, G.
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si1verghosts · 7 months ago
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you and me found love (lost under the shade)
re4r leon s. kennedy x fem reader (no use of y/n)
wc: 3.3k
18+ | cw: mentions of drinking, smoking, sex | tw: illusions to suicidal thoughts; author's general preoccupation with death and dying
read on ao3
title: falling asleep on a stranger by pierce the veil | art: taft bridge under the rain [#127] by carmonamedina
a/n: i honestly don't know if i am doing this whole tagging thing right idk how to tag on here so sorry if i missed anything.... anyways, this is the first thing i've managed to finish in months - i did not imagine the first leon fic i'd actually post would be reader insert but here we are!! i hope u enjoy :D
not beta read - all mistakes my own or done purposely due to my general disrespect for the grammatical conventions of the english language.
i do not own leon, yadda yadda, please don't sue me <3
please do not use my work to train any sort of AI chat bot and/or writing generator.
-----
"I can't be what you want," Leon had said, voice even. "Maybe you should try to find someone else; someone who can… be around."
Someone who can give you a straight answer. Someone who doesn't come home bloodied and bruised and can't tell you why. Someone who doesn't make you feel like it's all just a lie. 
You had never heeded any of Leon's suggestions before - "You should go," he had whispered after that first night, and the second, and the third - but you wish you had; so you give it a shot now. 
You let your friend set you up with the guy in accounting at her job she had been telling you about for months. "And get this - he always wears a tie bar! He just seems so put together," she had raved to you over drinks the weekend prior.
Accounting, tie bar, put together. Nice, neat, safe. 
You had shrugged, "give him my number."
He's waiting for you outside the bar when you arrive, jogs over when he notices you approaching, holding his umbrella out over you. It's unnecessary - the cold precipitation is hardly a mist, barely coating the strands of your hair. "You look beautiful," he smiles. It feels rehearsed, platitudinous. You thank him, letting him guide you inside. 
His hand brushes your arm as he helps you out of your jacket, skin soft. You pull away with the shock of it, covering with a small wave of beckoning. He falls in behind you as you traverse the familiar path through the room to your usual spot, settling in before he can manage to make a show out of pulling out your chair.
Same table, different seat; back against the wall - it's a whole new perspective. No longer focused solely on the person across from you, it's as if the whole world falls into your line of sight. It suddenly makes sense why you always found it so difficult to hold on to Leon's attention.
He slinks away to acquire your requested vodka soda from the bar. You pick at your nails until your fingers shake, shifting to look out the windows. The rain has picked up, pelting the glass and obscuring the view. You long for your car and the pack of menthols tucked away in the glove box, nobody to quit for now. 
He returns with your drinks, water for himself - "trying to cut back on carbs, you know? I've been making real progress with my lifts lately." 
"That's great," you smile. 
He leans in, beginning to chatter away excitedly about weights and protein and bicycles and Wall Street. His cologne reeks of business school, of polo shirts and white picket fences and 2.5 kids. You hope you are nodding at all the right moments. His tie bar catches the light of the Budweiser sign hanging behind you, silver glinting red, as if informing you you aren't.
It's hard, much harder than it reasonably should be but you've forgotten how to do this. Leon and you hardly spoke; the silence was easier - until it grew violent from your overreliance. 
You catch the ring of the doorbell over the drone of his voice, a familiar shape of blonde hair and brown leather entering your peripheral vision. You turn, a sick sense of satisfaction slithering up your spine. 
Shoulders hunched and hands shoved deep in his pockets, he shakes off the water droplets clinging to his hair like a dog. He picks his head up, blue eyes and dark circles meet your gaze almost immediately.
You raise a brow, I took your advice; happy?
He spins around, setting the bell off again as he slips out the door. 
"I'm sorry," you interrupt your date, who had been entertaining himself, seemingly never even recognizing your shift in attention. "I'll be right back." 
You are out the door a second later, shoving your arms back into the coat you thankfully remembered to grab, shielding your skin from the rain clouding your vision. Blinking away the droplets from your lashes, you spot Leon making his way down the sidewalk and take off after him, catching up as he nears the corner. 
You call to him, voice near enough to stop him, but only for a moment. "Go back inside," he throws over his shoulder, continuing forward.
You want to reach out and grab him, make him turn to look at you, but his shoulders are set in a tense line. Your touch is sure to set him off like a slingshot. 
Steeling yourself, you dart around him, blocking his path. You find yourself in front of him without any idea of what to say. You gape at him stupidly, chest heaving from the exertion of chasing him down; maybe you should've asked what's-his-name for a good gym recommendation before you ran off.
Leon entertains you for a moment before he huffs, eyes narrowing, "what are you doing?"
It's an excellent question - one you had never bothered to stop and ask yourself. 
What are you doing? 
Why did you agree to go for drinks? Why had you put on the dress Leon had carefully unzipped and let pool around your ankles just a few weeks ago? Why had you asked Mr. Tie Bar to meet you at the bar you knew Leon always popped into after work? 
Fuck. 
You swallow harshly, "trying." 
"Trying?" Leon reiterates, almost laughing. "And what is it that you are trying?"
Normal. To get over you. To make you mad. Honesty. To make you look at me. To make you want me like I want you. Safety. To hurt you. To get you to say something, anything. Trust. To get you to make me stay. To get you to stay. 
You feel yourself frown, the familiar pressure of tears building behind your nose. You try to swallow the feeling but it just mixes with the venom stuck in your throat, bubbling back up after mutating into a bitter twinge of anger. "What the hell does it look like, Leon? You told me to try to find someone else - that's what I'm trying."
He rocks back on his heels, crossing his arms. "Well, it doesn't really seem to be working out, does it?" 
"It was going great, actually." You smile, hoping it's not as hollow as you feel. 
"Oh, yeah?" He cocks a brow, lips pulling into a sly smirk. "Then why are you out here with me?
"You," you huff, at a loss. His words seem to be coming easier than ever while you choke on every one. You shrug, "You looked upset when you left."
"And I'm sure that's exactly what you wanted, right?" His smirk stretches into an acetous grin. "Came to relish in the tears, huh? Sorry to disappoint." He moves to brush by you, but you plant yourself in his path once again. 
"I can't believe-" you start, but stop short. Because you can believe he'd think of you that way - you'd never given him a reason to think otherwise. 
You think back to the silence that had made its home between the two of you, realizing you had used it as a confidant, letting it absorb everything you should've given to Leon instead. 
"I just wanted to check on you, see how you are doing." Your voice comes out as small as you feel under the weight of Leon's gaze. It's ironic - all this time you just wanted him to look at you, and now you wish he'd turn his eyes anywhere else. 
He snorts, short and irascibly, "I don't need you worrying about me."
"I know you don't, Leon," you throw your hands out, rainwater flicking off your skin with your exasperation. "You've made that very clear. But I can't help it - I'm going to anyways." 
"You shouldn't."
"Why not?" You half-yell, half-whine. You cringe at the sound, feeling slightly delirious; freezing cold and nearly begging him to let you care. 
 "Because you can do better." His voice is even once again, feelings stacked neatly away and locked up tight. 
"You don't get to decide that for me," you spit, ears ringing with the echo of your too-loud voice. 
"Yeah," he nods. "I do." 
He steps around you again, intending to disappear down the side street. But this time you grab him, fingers latching onto the slippery leather of his jacket, his arm as tense as a bowstring under your grip. 
"Let me go," he requests without turning to look at you, voice still even, even, even. It's a courtesy, he could easily pull free - but you are sick of his kindness, his courtesies; that's how you ended up here. You don't want them anymore.
"Make me." 
"Let me go," he repeats, slower and thicker. 
"No." If you want me gone, you'll have to force me. You don't say it, but you know he got the message when his shoulders slump, fight draining out of him all at once. 
With the thrill of victory that ripples through you, you make the mistake of loosening your hold on his jacket. He seizes the opportunity, twisting your arm and grabbing you by the bicep, pulling you close. He is running hot despite the chill of the rain, you have to force yourself not to relax into his heat. 
A moment passes, and then another. Neither of you move. The precipitation falls in sheets around you. You can't bring yourself to care. 
Your gaze slides from his chest to his neck to his jaw, backtracking the path of a stray raindrop. You chance a glance at his eyes, finding they are already on you, steely blue shimmering with the light of the streetlamp behind you. 
You love him. 
You wish the ground would crack open, allowing you to freefall straight down to hell. You imagine that would feel better - less painful - than this. 
You love him, and your skin burns with the feeling of it. You want to throw up. You want to kiss him. You want to pound your fists against his chest, curse him for doing this to you. 
You settle for allowing a sob to escape your throat. 
He releases you from his hold instantly at the sound. You scramble to grip his jacket to keep yourself upright - it's pitiful, the teeth of the zipper biting into the skin of your hands. The sharp pain comes as a tether, gifting you the space to ground yourself, to shove the tears back down. 
"I'm sorry," he whispers, tight and clipped. "I didn't mean to-"
"No," you cut him off, voice rough, grating. "It wasn't. You didn't hurt me."
"Okay," he mutters. 
You laugh. You love him and you can't help but laugh, sinking into the insanity of it. 
You feel him start to stiffen again, unsure. The feeling of his discomfort building under your fingers forces you back into yourself, realizing where you are, that you've been causing a scene on the corner down the block from his apartment. 
You release him, but you don't step away, tilting your head just enough to take in the sight of him - parted lips and a handful of freckles, blonde hair tinted green by the neon sign over the entrance of the convenience store a few feet away. 
"I'm sorry," you croak out, drifting back; wishing the rain would melt you down, suck you into the storm drain. That's the only thing that could pull you from him, you think; swirling down the gutters with the cigarette butts and the fallen cherry blossoms until you're laid to rest at the bottom of the Potomac. 
His nose twitches. "For what?"
That I can't find someone else, can't force myself away from you.
That I love you, but can't tell you.  
"For," you throw your hands out, weaker than before. "All of it."
He nods, "It's okay."
You don't want it to be, but you suddenly feel exhausted. Too tired to fight, to pull any more truths from him. 
"Take me home?" You request, you plead. 
He nods again, holding his hand out to you. "Yeah."
You intertwine your fingers with his own, the roughness of his callouses and scars soothing in their familiarity. 
The walk to his place is short. You don't bother trying to shake off the water before entering, leaving a trail of raindrops up the stairwell, down the hall, through his front door, across his apartment to the tiled floor of his bathroom. 
He reaches into the shower, cranking the hot water, allowing the stream to heat up as he helps you out of your wet clothes. He removes the drenched fabric piece by piece - jacket first, then your dress, unzipping it with even more care than the previous time. It doesn't slip off with the same ease, but his gentle fingers pull it from your skin until it falls away. He crouches to undo your shoes, allowing you to step out of them before reaching up and rolling your nylons, guiding them down your legs. 
He moves to do the same with your underwear, fingers resting on the waistband as he glances up to you, silently asking your permission even though he already has it, always will. There's no heat behind his actions, but the tenderness sears your skin all the same. You nod, a low ache settling into the center of your chest as he slides them off you before standing. You unclasp your bra; he doesn't comment on the matching set.
The steam of the boiling shower envelops you as you undress him in turn. You struggle with his belt buckle, stiff fingers uncooperative. He takes over and you drop to your knees to untie the laces of his boots, finding them mercifully secured with single-knots. You make quick work of them and he reaches down to help you up, moving you out of the way before he kicks them off. 
You assist him in pulling his shirt over his head, peeling the cotton away from his skin. You unbutton his jeans as he removes the clips from your hair, wet strands falling limply in front of your eyes. 
"Go ahead and get in, I'll go throw this stuff in the wash." His voice is mellifluous, sickeningly soft. 
It makes you feel like a kid, incompetent and helpless. You hate him for it. You hate yourself for twisting his kindness into something dark and disgusting. 
"I can help," you offer, because that's all you can do; already leaning down to collect your things. "You have to hang the jacket, it's-"
"Wool. I know," his hand brushes your back lightly, "it's okay. I'll be right back."
You straighten up, allowing him to guide you across the bathroom and help you into the tub. You slowly ease your way under the hot stream as he slides the shower curtain closed. 
You watch the shape of him through the cloudy plastic, shucking off his jeans and pulling off his socks. The sobs you had just barely choked down twice before make another escape attempt, clawing at your throat as you watch his shadow collect your clothes and move down the hall. 
You shut your eyes against the sudden emptiness of the room, against the tears and the silence and the panic; against the loathing and inferiority. You take the coward's way out, turning away from it all to hold your face up to the showerhead. 
He returns quickly, rustling around for a moment before slipping into the tub behind you. His presence awards you the bravery you needed to crack open your eyes, to clear your throat. "You're wrong, you know."
Exhaustion overshadows his amusement as he hums in question, "about what?"
Picking your hand up, you reach out slowly to slide your fingers along his collarbone, circle the puckered scar on his shoulder. "That I can find someone better." 
He scoffs, dropping his head, hair fluttering down to obscure his face. 
You move your hand to his neck, thumbing his jaw. "If anything, it's me who doesn't deserve you, Leon." 
He shakes his head, but you ignore the action, continuing before he can protest. "Nobody can take care of me like you do - not even myself. I'm sorry" - for needing you, for burdening you; for loving you even though I'm unworthy of it - "for pushing you. I understand there are things you can't share, but I want whatever you can."
You sigh, shifting your hand at his neck to pull him to you; he follows you easily, achingly. "Even if it's just this." 
He nods minutely, hooking his arms over your hips and resting his forehead on yours. Answer delivered on a breath that floats across your lips, "alright." 
You remain in his arms, his agreement echoing in your mind in time with the beat of your heart in your chest. Seconds morph into minutes, only moving when the water begins to grow cold. 
You wash first, your shampoo and conditioner still on the rack next to his own. Leaving him under the stream, you make your way to his room after wrapping yourself in one of the towels he'd brought into the bathroom. 
Home. You had asked him to take you home and he brought you here, despite your own place being just a few blocks further in the opposite direction of his from the corner you had been on. But his assumption was right; this - he - was home to you.  
The emptiness of his apartment was unsettling at first, but it quickly grew comforting - no regrets staining the carpet; no photos on the dresser of you as a girl you don't remember being. Here you could be untethered from the past you didn't want; white walls graciously offering a clean slate, even if you didn't deserve it, didn't earn it. 
There is a shirt of his waiting on the bed for you, a pair of your pajama pants in the drawer next to his. Your stomach turns at the sight - no wonder he had tried to push you away; you had subconsciously settled into his space, his closet and his bed. 
Your mug in the sink, your pills behind the mirror - the reckless domesticity of it all is startling, terrifying. He had given you an inch and you had taken a mile, too eager for the chance to be something new. 
You pull on the clothes, making your way towards the balcony, a wave of nausea rolling through you under the soft cotton. Outside, it's still raining, translucent ropes sluicing off the overhang of the roof. 
You almost immediately regret stepping outside, feeling as if it's a betrayal of the care Leon took to get you warm; but you needed it. The chill of the air forces your thoughts to line up, to wait to be addressed one by one.
His hand leading you home, your wool coat hung to dry, his shirt waiting on the bed for you to occupy - each act a silent invitation; the realization stirs inside you, grips your collarbones from the inside. 
Could it be…?
You should ask him, but you've asked for more than enough tonight. 
He slides open the glass door, sweatpants low on his hips; the lamp on his nightstand illuminates him from behind, feathering out all his sharp edges. Maybe it's not love; maybe it's just lust, desire - a need so great it's all-consuming. You have no point of comparison to use as a frame of reference, to assist in finding the distinction. 
"I was away for a few days, there's not much in the fridge. Is ramen alright or do you want to order something?" He asks and it's love, you are suddenly sure of it. 
You turn; the sight of Leon in the buttery glow of the bedroom acting as a beacon, guiding you through the terror. "Ramen is fine."
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saey707 · 10 months ago
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I am BEGGING for more Yandere heartsteel Yone!! What do you think he would act like if during his carreer he found himself falling in love with someone or even dating them?
I feel like the fans would know nothing about the fact that he has a partner he loves very… very much. Imo he would want to keep them out of the spotlight as much as possible to “protect” them (aka nobody can have them other than him) and he has to manipulate his way into making reader into the perfect obedient partner that has eyes only for him.
✿ Prompt: Yone wants to "protect" you ✿
♡ champion focus: yone ♡ tw: yandere-ish, manipulation ♡ Gender-neutral reader
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From the beginning of your relationship with Yone, you always felt something was... off about him. Of course, that was a given, especially considering how little everybody knew about him.
Nobody truly knew a thing about Yone, other than the simple facts: He loved cold brew, was a Taurus, was an INFJ, and frequently micromanaged the chaotic life he and his friends lead.
Overall, Yone was a private person, preferring to not manage any socials, let alone be a figure in the spotlight on television Instead, he would occasionally hop onto corporate socials to answer any burning questions the Heartbeats had regarding new projects, songs, or tour dates. He'd stray towards the back and allow his friends to have the front floor. It's how he preferred things to be.
Upon meeting you, Yone never believed he could fall in love with someone as conservative as himself. Someone who preferred to keep the intimate details to oneself and valued a small circle. A person who didn't want to put all their personal information, memories, and photos out for the public to gaze upon.
It seemed fate had a way of drawing the two of you together- Him to you and you to him.
And ensnared within the jaws of Yone's adoration, his obsession, the desperate producer took all measures necessary to root out every fragment of information he could about you. His torment to understand you was extreme. Yone was extreme.
"There's still so much I have yet to discover about you..." "Heh... I could say the same to you."
Secrets Yone always confined and kept to himself effortlessly flowed past his lips when it came to you. Yone was hungry to know all the little things about you that the world didn't know. And the world just may... Never truly know a thing about you either.
Because you were- for the most part- off the grid, it didn't make it hard for Yone to keep you all to himself. In fact, he wanted nothing more than to do just that. Why should the world get to know you as intimately as he did?
"I'm thinking about making an Instagram account..." you voiced aloud, staring at your phone. This immediately caught the attentive ears of Yone. Turning your attention to your boyfriend, you failed to notice how he tensed up, lips forming a tight line. His trepidatious fingers bounced on the rim of his mug.
"Is that so?" he began in a low and quiet tone.
You shrugged, "I mean it could be a nice place to put all of our memories!" Yone chuckled coldly, shrugging his shoulders. And with that, he picked up his mug and made his way over to you.
"Sure, sure, sure... I'm just worried that this will take away the mystery from our love lives." Your brows furrowed in confusion. So the producer continued.
"You know... Putting our business out in the public? Honestly... The last thing I want is for the fans to say something to you. You know how they act when one of us starts dating... Constantly prying for information, wanting to know more..."
He cleared his throat, "...I just don't want to put you under the spotlight, you know- public scrutiny could hurt."
"Yeah, I get it." You responded, forlorn that your lover didn't seem invested in the idea.
Yone wrapped his arms around you from behind the couch, and with a sigh, pressed his lips to your temple. "Ultimately, it's your decision. I'm just worried you'll become overwhelmed with all the attention."
Nodding your head, you pushed your head against his neck. "You might be right about that. I'll think on it a bit longer before deciding."
Still, even with a decision that still had yet to be sorted out, Yone still wasn't pleased with it. He hated that he was out of control. He hated that you were even considering putting yourself out there!
It made him feel like someone could easily take you away from him- Like others would have the ability to uncover all of the secrets that should only be confined between you and him!
So he made the hard decision to lie to you one evening.
"The fans have become quite violent lately." He voiced, looking at an article on his laptop. "They're starting to bump up our security. Or at least, that is the plan I've decided..." Yone sighed. A look of concern crossed your face.
"Why?" You questioned, cautiously walking over.
Yone turned his head to peer towards where you were standing. "There's... A rumor going around. Heartbeats are speculating that I'm dating someone." He informed with a forged sadness on his face, watching your eyes widen in shock.
And how he loved the look of fear in your eyes.
He had you in the palm of his hand, wrapped around his finger. He knew if he scared you just a little bit you'll be at his mercy. Yone knew you'd come around and listen to him.
"I'm sorry..." "Don't be. It's not your fault. I should have done a better job of protecting you."
You shook your head stubbornly. "Stop. You shouldn't be beating yourself up over this, Yone. You do plenty to protect me." You rushed over, wrapping your arms tightly around him. You felt for a second that if you let go, you would lose him. You felt... afraid.
Aimlessly, you were trying to feel a sense of security, one of which Yone would happily provide with his following statements:
"It's best the two of us just lay low for now. Okay?" He smiled, kissing the top of your forehead.
"As long as you listen to me, I'll keep you safe in my arms. Always."
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goldlockets-and-redwine · 8 months ago
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You're The Worst | Chapter 1
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Pairing: Touya Todoroki x Reader
Word Count: 875 words
Summary: Paw's and Claw's has a fun staff. However, the nosy bad boy, Touya, loves to pick on you. What will happen when he notices the array of bruises hidden under your sweatshirts? Maybe he isn't so bad after all.
Author's Note: So, this fic idea has been in my mind for a while. I hope everyone likes it. This will be a multi-chapter fic as I don't have a ton of time to write. Oof. Please be patient with me. Also, I inserted my cat Thomas because it's almost been a year since he passed, and I think of him every day. I know. So self-indulgent.
TW: Domestic Violence (Not from Touya), Fem!Reader, Violence in general (There will be a fight, not in this chapter though.), drinking, smoking, cursing. Let me know if I missed anything!
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“That looks like shit.”
Good god, I wish he would just shut up. This is the third time today he’s butted into my work.
“No, it looks great Touya. You’re just an ass with shit handwriting. Jealous much?” We looked over my work. The sign looked great honestly. I really outdid myself this time. In delicate script it read “Tom” adorned with little hearts around the name. I put up the sign on Tom’s’ kennel, a large grey and white cat sitting at the farthest possible corner of the kennel away from the door. “Do you have his bio?”
“Of course, what am I? Incompetent?” He made quick work of putting up his bio underneath the name card I made. He typed his up like normal. I gazed sadly at the big tom cat sitting in the cage. “Hey doll, he’ll get adopted. You always get too attached.”
I grimaced at the pet name. He always looks for a way under my skin. However, he took it upon himself to never call me by name. I need to come up with my own for him. Maybe he’ll leave me alone if I come up with something heinous.
“Some of us have hearts, jackass.” Wait, that one fits. Still not original enough. I glanced at him to see him already staring at me. If looks could kill. You would think working in a shelter there would be nice coworkers here. Everyone else was nice. Not this guy. His intimidating look didn’t help his case. Tattoos were everywhere but the one on his face gets the most frowns from potential adopters. The row of flames over his left brow. Wait is that… “Touya, did you redye your hair? You should do a better job of not getting that shit on your skin. You look insane.”
“Why you lookin’ at me so hard? Like what you see?” My face was already showing my irritation before, but now I could feel it twist in disgust.
“No. The hair dye stains are really not doing it for me.” I do a swift 180 degrees and make my way out of the cat room and into the lobby once more. “Hey Toga! Any new applications come in?” Her face lit up as she looked up at me. Her sharp canines stuck out as she smiled.
“(Y/N)! We had one come in for Mochi!” She was practically jumping out of her chair. “Dabi! Come and look at the place!” Touya leaned over the counter and looked down above the monitor as I walked around the desk. It was a beautiful house in suburbia with a huge fenced in back yard. “Mochi will love it, don’t ya think?”
“He’ll love it little vamp.” I said. My eyes hovered over the screen to notice the time. “You should head out. It’s 5:30! You know the boss won’t be happy about you staying over too much.”
Toga pouted, but I was right. Tomura gets so pressed when she stays over. It must be that big brother dynamic. She got up to gather her things for the evening and shut down the computer. “He’ll be fine, but I’ll tell him you guys said hi!” With that she gave me a big hug and skipped towards the door and out to the parking lot. Touya turned and stared at me as soon as he had locked the door. Without saying a word I got to work cleaning the lobby. Working with animals was messy and there was a mix of dog and cat hair being swept up. I heard Touya’s heavy boots moving towards the hallway leading to the dog kennels. I instantly relaxed and continued my chores, completely blocking out my thoughts.
-
“Doll,” My body was on autopilot as I put away the cleaning supplies. “Don’t ignore me doll. It’s time to bail.” I quickly finished putting things up and grabbed my bag. Both our footsteps synced as we made our way to the door. Touya held the door open. “Ladies first.” I could hear the cockiness in his voice. He wasn’t going to get a reaction out of me so late in the day. My car’s taillights blinked as I unlocked it. Today was a hot one. The evening sun was shining on me. I pushed up the sleeves to my sweater and was nearly to my car when I heard Touya’s deep voice closer to me than expected. “That’s a nasty bruise.”
The sweaters I wore for the last 6 months were to avoid these questions. It was no secret Kai, my boyfriend, wasn’t the best guy. His record was a mile long. No one would know he mistreated me, however. Kai made a good show of being a loving boyfriend while also being a piece of shit in every other aspect of his life. He won me over with gifts and treated me like a princess. He said I was his perfect girl. Do men treat perfect girls like this?
“Mind your business.”
Touya’s eyes narrowed. “I’m not a dumbass, (y/n).” With that he got in his black 5.0 mustang and pulled out of the parking lot leaving me standing next to my car.
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fluffymiyaa · 2 years ago
Text
Ditto
Bestfriend!reo x reader
Tw: reo being obsessive and creepy towards reader, but that's just how he is.
Summary: what happen if you finally confessed to your best friend and he doesn't know it?
I got nothing to lose 널 좋아한다고 ♡
Masterlist
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The wind blowing against your sensitive skin gives you goosebumps. the raindrops that bounced off the ground made you take a few steps back under the roof of the school terrace. Feeling of restlessness and regret arises for forgetting to bring an umbrella.
You sigh thinking of ways to get home without getting wet. You have asked your friends to share umbrellas but they are already full. And your best friend Reo has practice today. And to be honest don't want to face him right now. You can't. Not after what you just did.
A tap on your shoulder interrupted your thoughts.
"Haah, sorry, have you been waiting long?" He asked with panting breath.
You frowned. Questioned why he was here.
"Reo? What are you doing here? Don't you have practice?"
"Ah, practice got cancel today" He said as he fixing his bun hair. One of his habits that makes you like him even more.
"Oh"
A bunch of girls pass by you and and greet Reo.
"Reo go home savely! Don't forget to eat the chocolates i made~"
"Reo-senpai otsukaresama~, read my letter ok?
"Reo-san see u tomorrow~"
Reo just said thank you and smiled at them. But deep down he was irritated by those noisy chirping. But he can't show it, not infront of you.
"Should we go now?" He asked
"What do you mean? Aren't you going to be picked up by car? or together nagi?"
He gasped. "Ouch, today is valentines day and MY DEAR best friend refused to come home with me" he said by dramatizing his words and his voice made it sound like a deep hurt. Put his hand oh his chest.
You sighed. "I didn't say no Reo. I also didn't bring any umbrella with me"
Reo stared at you for a moment. He opened his bag and took his umbrella and opened it.
"Well? I guess we have to share umbrella, huh?" He grinned.
"How did you get an umbrella? You never bring it before" you ask suspiciously.
"Hmm, doesn't matter"
You rolled you eyes, though your heart starts beating so fast. "C'mon, we need to walk faster before the rain get worse". Just started walking a few steps Reo suddenly grabbed your shoulder.
"Get closer, you'll get wet"
"Oh yeah, thanks"
After a while, you two walk without saying anything. There was only the sound of raindrops and the stomping of feet on the muddy ground from both of you.
"You're a little quiet today, we haven't talked much." He finally talked. His words made you flinch a little.
"Oh, sorry.. it's just today it's valentines day.. and people have been around you all day to gave you presents. Unlike you, nobody gave me any presents or chocolate... I just keep a distance to not bother you."
It's honestly makes you sad and insecure about it. You feel like you don't pretty enough and doesn't deserve to be Reo's side.
"Huh? Don't do that! You're not bothering me! Stop keep a distance on me okay? We've been friends fo long. No need to hold back like that. And who cares about the present or chocolate?! If you something you could just ask me, i'll buy a whole chocolate factory for you!" He annoyed. He's not joking tho. He would , if you ask him to.
You chuckled. "Okay okay Reo"
He smirked. "I got a unique present in my locker today"
You gulped. "Yeah? What is it?"
"A lego flower"
Fuck.
"With a small letter"
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Nervousness devours your body. You play your fingers trying to distract yourself.
"You're so lucky. It needs days or all night to make lego flower" you said trying to calm yourself.
His smile widened, he even bit his lower lip to hold it in. His face getting red. He looked away so you wouldn't see him. Then he turned back to you embraced you closer to him make your bodies touch. His hand was still tightly gripping the handle of the umbrella.
"Hmm you right.. maybe i should accept their feeling? You have any idea who send this, Y/n?" He whispered right to your ears. Makes your back shivered and whole body heats up. You pushed Reo a little from you.
"Ugh why would i know? Don't pulled me like that"
"Sorry. But.. something off about this person"
You and Reo walk back down the street to your house which is in the same complex. The rain has started to subside.
"How?" You asked
"I wonder how the person put it in my locker. Nobody knows the code except me, nagi.. or you. Well it couldn't be Nagi, he's with me since the morning"
"Re-really? Could there be a stalker? Maybe it's one of your fans?"
"Eh, i should be more carefull then"
You both fell silent as you continued walking. You turned to Reo and stared at his beautiful feature. He is a tall young man with a lean and strong build. He has chin-length purple hair, his tied in a high bun, leaving two locks of hair framing his face. And also his bright purple eyes. Until your eyes catch something.
"Reo! Y-your shoulder is getting wet!" You panicked and push the umbrella to cover him up. But he gripped it tighter and pushed it in the opposite.
"Ah, it's fine. I'm gonna take a shower anyway." he said casually.
"But-"
"Shhh, let's walk faster."
His right hand grabs your hand and dragged you. The grip of the left hand never left tge the umbrella handle. Splashes of water stain your shoes up to your calves makes them dirty. But you don't care. What you care about right now you and Reo are holding hand and running through the rain. You both laughters are buried by the sound of the rain. But as long as you guys can hear each other that's enough.
"Haahhh finally we arrived" he groaned.
"Well we are arrived at MY house. Your house still a couple blocks from here." you said
He raised his one eyebrow. "So? It's still the same. C'mon" he dragged you into your house. Opened the door for you to enter first, then closed the umbrella first and put it in the basket. He immediately closed the door so that rainwater does not enter into more of the house.
"Where's your mum?"
"At aunt's"
You opened you shoes and he followed. When you were about to take your shoes and his to put them in the shoe rack, he stopped you. "No, you're hands will get dirty. I'll do it myself. Just go and get clothes for me, yeah?"
You nodded. "I'll prepare a clean clothes for you and make us a hot chocolate. If you finish just go upstairs and wait in my room"
•••••
Reo who is alone in your room, felt he was almost crazy now, he couldn't stop smiling and giggling at what he had just seen now.
He found a box of lego flowers under your bed.
Fu*k she's so cute
He staring his shirt and his short on your bed that you already prepared for him. He quickly changed his wet uniform.
Knock knock
"Reo? Are you finish changing?"
"Yeah, come in"
You go in and found reo sitting relaxed on your bed with the clothes you prepared earlier for him.
"You still keep my clothes, huh?" He teased
Blood rushing to you cheeks. "You never bring you clothes with you after sleepover here. So i keep it."
It's true though. Reo always refused to take the clothes from the day before because he likes the fact that you will wash his clothes and keep it in your little wardrobe together with your clothes. And now you and him share the same smell.
You walk towards your floor table and put the 2 cups of hot chocolate. Reo staring at you still wearing your school uniform. "Aren't you going to change, y/n?"
"O-oh right. Wait"
You open your wardobe and take out your t-shirt and shorts. Then go to the bathroom. Reo was holding back to says "why don't you just change you clothes here?" But no, he won't going that far. But he'll be lying if he doesn't want to know what your reaction would be. It must be cute he thinks.
You got out from your bathroom already changed. You see Reo already sat on the carpet as he drinks his hot chocolate. He looks at you and tapping his empty side gives a signal to you to sit down.
You both sit there in silence. You drink your hot chocolate try to break the silence but it's not working. It feels awkward and you got more nervous. You think maybe you should just confessed to him right now but you're too scared. What if Reo doesn't feel the same way and you friendship will get ruin.
In the other side, Reo knows whats happening, he can see how shaking and confused you are and he likes it, way too likes it. He almost feel bad. But he couldn't help it you just so cute and looks fragile to him.
"Reo.. say something..."
He chuckled. Your whine sounds just melodies to him. And the next think he said is surprised you.
"Ditto"
You look at him in wide eyes.
"E-eh?"
"Why? You look surprised" he smiled at you.
You really thought that word was for you. But there's no way, Reo doesn't know that it was you, right?
"No, it's just why you randomly said that like you answering the letter."
He laughed.
"I never show you what's inside the letter, Y/n. How did you know?" His face getting closer to yours.
"......"
"......"
Eh? He never show it? I thought-
Ahh what am i going to do?!
Did he find out?!
How?!
You frozed. Speechless. You opened your mouth but nothing comes out. Your heart beats fast. Your body heats up even though it's cold outside due to the rain. You just sit there look at him who still smiling at you.
Ah, my y/n just so clueless. Oh, is she gonna cry? Cute.
"I said that i like you too you know, aren't you happy about it?" Reo pouted.
"N-no i- of cource i'm happy, Reo!" Your hands cling hard on his tshirt. You get too overhelmed you didn't even realize tears coming down to your face. You've been waiting for this for so long.
"God, you're so pretty" he whispered. He's gone mad.
He's getting closer to close the gap between you two till your lips touched. He placed his hand under your jaw, his other hand squished you hip as you hands still clinging on his tshirt. He open up lil bit his mouth so you did it too. Now you both can taste each others sweetness from hot chocolate. Then he pulled away makes you whined.
He licked his lips. "Sweet". It makes you feel more embarassed.
"Thanks for the flowers, baby. I love it" he said as he stroked your cheeks. You nodded and shying away.
"Oh, i have a present to for you. Here, Happy Valentines day, y/n" he hand you a purple little box.
"Can open it?"
"Hmm, go on, sweety" his petnames gave you butterfly.
You open the box. And there were two hairpins with Kuromi's face inside. It makes you eyes twickled, you smile at it.
Reo rubbed his back neck. "Well i know it's not really special or expensive. I just want make it as a symbols that we're official now. You see.. there's two of it, one for me and one for you. Ah but you know, i would buy anything for you, okay? Is there anything i could get for you?"
You laughed and shook your head. "No, thank you, Reo. These are so adorable, i like it very much." You took one hairpin and placed it on your hair. You took the other one and placed on Reo's hair.
"Aww we're pairing right now, so cute hehe. Lets take some pictures, Reo?"
How could he says no to his baby, of course he said yes to everything you want and need.
These wholesome romance scenes makes him forgot about a bad things he did. From canceled his practiced and told his driver to not pick him up so he can go home with you. From he took advantages one of his fan and took her umbrella without caring how she's gonna get home. From how threating any guys that want to get closer or have a crush on you and it makes you feel insecure and sad, he feels bad about that one though. But it doesn't matter, you only need him, you're gonna choose him and him only. Well you just did.
You're all his now. Though, you already his since the first time you met. That's why you always together. He's always been there for you whenever you happy, sad, angry, he's there with open arms. He treats you well too, bought you anything you want or need, always satisfied you and makes you happy with him.
He deserves you right? You deserve each other. That's why you chose him. And he won't let that change.
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Reblogs are more appreciated! Thanks for the notes<3
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marshmellowtea · 1 month ago
Note
For fun: any agereg headcanons for Will Clarke :0
oh my gosh so many you have no idea alkgjdaslkf. i know i've made posts about him before but i don't think i've made a headcanon compilation post for him yet (and if i have uhhh i forgor 💀) so i'm gonna use this ask as an excuse to do that hope you're ready—
i already know this is gonna get long so i'm gonna put it under a readmore. tws for mentions of canon abuse and cults, and discussion of diapers. let me know if i should warn for anything else <3
will generally regresses anywhere between 0-5, but usually he hovers near the 1-3 end of that spectrum. he baby
his main caregivers are mike, tanya, and yu (who i like to picture adopting him in a happier au 🥲), but martha, ellie, and fisher and hutchins (for my tedfishyu fans out there lol) also step in from time to time. i think jimmy also sometimes looks after him but that's usually when he and regina have playdates (i also headcanon her as a regressor but that's a thought for another time lol)
i think mrs. hutchins steps in to look after him from time to time too, especially before he's taken in by his adopted family (which she's also a part of i'm not leaving her out, she's just there first and before it's official lol). i don't think she knew he was regressing per se, she just knew he was a vulnerable teenager who acted kinda childlike sometimes so she did her best to look after him when he needed it <3
lila also pops in from time to time in nice aus where she exists still, either as a headmate or as a separate person—she's my beautiful, evil babygirl so i usually tend to write her in somehow lol. i see her as a regressor leaning flip but she only ever really looks out for will, and she's more of a big sister figure to him than anything.
will is not picky about using caregiver titles, lol. if you're looking after him there is a strong chance you will get called mama/papa/dada at some point, even if you're just a babysitter and especially if he's regressed super duper young. i think they're like verbal stims for him when he's little, so unless you're tanya, mike, yu, ted, mrs. hutchins or fisher he doesn't necessarily think of you as a parental caregiver, he just really likes saying those terms :') and yes this is a bit of a projection on my part lol
will is not a permaregressor per se, but i do think once he finds his family he spends a lot of time regressed due to being forced to grow up too fast and the abuse he suffered from his mom and the fraternity (and lila, depending on the au. i love her but she's also canonically a villain and sometimes i do explore that in agere aus)
he's also definitely a padded regressor, i think he has a lot of incontinence issues due to disability and the aforementioned trauma that get exacerbated when he's little so it's just better to keep him in diapers or pull ups. i think they also just generally make him feel safe and comfortable, so he doesn't mind wearing them—he did have shame about it at first for needing them, but his found family has been nothing but supportive and kind about it so he's able to embrace needing them and find comfort in them :')
he has so many soft and comfy clothes!! onesies, big t-shirts (many of them stolen from his cgs hehe), overalls, super soft sweaters, and a few nightgowns/dresses/spinny skirts cuz gnc will reigns supreme in my head lmao. i think he has a wide variety of styles too because basically all of his caregivers have bought or lent him him clothes at some point and they all have drastically different styles so what he's wearing highly depends on who's looking after him and what cute outfit they wanna see him in XD
he enjoys it though! it's kinda fun being their dress up doll sometimes, especially cuz they like to coo at him and take pictures of him when they dress him up. it makes him feel very pretty and loved <3
honestly will doesn't really care much about gender in general, and that's doubled when he's little. he has a wide variety of toys ranging from traditionally "masculine" like trains and legos to traditionally "feminine" like play dress up costumes and a gorgeous dollhouse he got for christmas one year. i'm also shamelessly stealing this headcanon from @whenthedeeppurplefalls but he also lovessss puppets and has a handful of those as well, along with a puppet theater lovingly handmade by mike and tanya for a different christmas (or his birthday, i haven't decided lol)
honestly a lot of these headcanons have probably been at least partially stolen from tanya so shout out to her give her some appreciation <3
his taste in tv shows is similarly varied i think. going back to the puppet thing his faves are definitely the muppet show and sesame street but i like to think he's also a strawberry shortcake, scooby doo, my little pony and blue's clues kid also projection don't worry about it, pfft. he'll watch most things without complaint but those are his faves :)
he's a very touch starved kid so he can get pretty physically clingy sometimes and it's very adorable 🥹 sometimes he goes through periods of touch aversion (usually due to trauma flashbacks or overstimulation) but most of the time he wants to be close to his cgs so he's frequently being held in their arms or lap or just holding their hand waugh
generally will's a really easy kid. he's very sweet and doesn't like to act out, and if he does act out it's usually cuz he's overstimulated or having a bad brain day, and occasionally he will have meltdowns. his cgs have developed gentle protocols for dealing with those days and ways to prevent them because it is NOT fun to see their baby hurting and upset :(
loooooves playing pretend, especially if he gets to play an animal :3
he loves animals in general, whether it's watching shows about them or being read books about them. he canonically feels a kinship with them after all!
related but every time he's taken to the zoo or aquarium it's the best day of his life aglkjdsklfjd. he also likes going to the library and the park, and sometimes for a special occasion his family takes him to an amusement park or festival where he gets to go on the rides (it's very stimulating for him in a good way, you know how little kids like to be thrown around sometimes? it's like that <3)
he's pretty clumsy even out of headspace so his balance is naturally even worse when he's in headspace alkgjadsklf. his caregivers often have to catch him when he wobbles, and if he's younger than two, they often need to carry him (at that point he's usually crawling anyway, but if there's places he needs to go that's when they just ask if they can scoop him up......assuming he hasn't already asked to be carried, that is 🥺)
okay this has gotten out of hand so i'll end it here lol, but god i have. so many thoughts about this kid i forgot how much i loved little will waaauuugh 🥹🥰
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jiyansthesis · 2 years ago
Text
NOT A ROOKIE ☆ ANYMORE
SIMON "GHOST" RILEY
x fem reader
summary: it's been a few years, and you've quickly made it up the ranks with your craftmanship and sheer skill when it comes to hand-to-hand combat and guns. when you get put on a new mission, you never guessed who would be there to save you
note: part 2!! honestly some people wanted to know when pt.2 came out, so should i make a taglist for my ghost fics? just comment or msg me if you want me to put you on it! i don't really like this i feel like it's so rushed or something?? idk it doesn't click. THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING A KISSING SCENE PLEASE B NICE
tw: brief mention of non-con (but does not happen to any character in past or during this ff)
pt.1 // not proofread
☆☆.
shadow.
shadows can be your greatest fear, not knowing what lies in the darkness ahead of you. an enemy, or is it your mind playing tricks on you?
it can also be a safe haven, a refuge from the blistering sun, or other things.
but that can simply be a facade, a trap for others to fall into.
using the shadows to your advantage can be lethal. being quiet, deliberate in your actions as you sneak up behind someone and take them out without causing alarm.
when harnessed correctly, shadows can be your greatest weapon.
. .
"i've got him in my sights. ready when you are." you said, staring at the back of your target's head through your scope.
you waited for confirmation, but no response came.
"captain?" you spoke, even momentarily taking your eyes off the man who isn't aware of what's about to be his untimely demise to inspect your radio.
"fuck." you wouldn't shoot without orders, having learned your lesson way back, during the mission right after you met ghost. that mission also led you to be called shadow.
you heard a crackle, and what you could make out to be, "go."
you immediately put your finger on the trigger, realigning your gun, and once you were ready, you let out a deep exhale and added pressure, the recoil always making you blink against your will. you watched as the man almost immediately slumped over.
"target down." you began packing up your gear and gun, trying to get to the rendezvous before anyone came to check out the noise.
"shadow. shadow, can you hear me? shadow, how copy?" you heard.
"captain? what's wrong?" you asked, already going down the stairs of the building, sprinting.
"did you shoot?" price sounded slightly worried.
"yes. didn't you give me the affirmative?" did you mishear him? fuck, the only reason why he wouldn't want you to shoot was probably because you shot the wrong target. "don't fucking tell me i shot the wrong person."
"no, you got the right one alright. i just need you to watch out. turns out a lot of people have already found out about your little assassination. they were ready for it. be careful making your way back. i've got a little surprise waiting for you here."
"a prize? you finally rewarding me for my hard work?" you chuckled, now on even higher alert for soldiers coming at you.
"honestly, it's up to you if you think if it's a prize."
"is it a medal? i fucking hate medals. the fuck am i gonna do with them?" you scowled, the balaclava you had on shifting as your nose scrunched up.
"nah, you might actually like this. just get here safe."
"i'm looking forward to this, price. don't disappoint me. or i'll make sure you won't touch another cigarette in your life." you grinned as you stuck to the darker areas, trying your best not to be seen by coincidence.
you paused, hearing loud footsteps. you could tell that it wasn't only one person, but multiple.
"fuck," you whispered under your breath. you took out your knife and strapped your gun onto yourself, ready to do some close combat.
you saw them turn the corner, seeing three men, all armed with guns. there was no way you were going to be able to take them all down, but you can hope that they wouldn't notice you.
you pulled your balaclava down even more on instinct, waiting for one of them to sound the alarm and shoot.
you stayed close to the wall, thankful for the shadows that were keeping you from their line of sight.
two of the men split off, turning left before they could make it to you, but one kept making his way over. as soon as he made it in arm's length to you, you quickly covered his mouth and lodge your knife into his throat, watching as he struggled.
"sorry man, i just had to." you frowned as you let him go to eventually die on the floor, retrieving your knife.
you continued on, realizing that the other two had went the way that you had to go. there was no other route that you could go on.
"fucking hell," you grabbed your gun again, ready to fire before the duo could notice you.
you followed them, and sooner or later you caught up. they kept walking, deep in conversation. letting out two quick shots, they had no time to react.
"that was unfair, wasn't it?" you said to yourself. as you made your way around the bodies, trying to get as far as possible before another group came along.
sadly enough, you couldn't get far enough before another trio intercepted your path, also all armed with guns.
you quickly raised your arms up. how the fuck were you getting out of this one?
"what are you doing here?" one of the men said, and you realized that you were far enough way from everyone you've killed for them to even known what you've done. maybe you could play off being one of them, but that would be very hard considering the fact your gear was so much different from theirs.
you looked at him questioningly as if you couldn't understand him, simply letting out a "huh?"
the trio looked at each other, then back at you. you weren't tricking anyone with the tactical gear you had on and gun in hand.
"come with us," one of them smirked. this fucking can't be good.
you knew you were outnumbered, especially with all of them having guns. there was no way you were going to be able to run away or get past killing one of them before you got shot down.
you nodded hesitantly, and the three huddled around you, one of them holding a metal barrel to your head. you could feel it through the fabric, and you began sweating. this was the closest to death you've ever been, and one wrong move could be the last move you would ever make.
they led you away from the bodies, and closer to where you were originally going to go, thankfully, and you made it to a big house, in better shape than all the other house around.
a cloth quickly made its way over your eyes, and someone pushed you to the floor, tying your legs together, but for some reason not tying your hands together, when that's the most useful thing you could have in this situation. you felt the weight of your gun being taken off your body and be set somewhere else.
"just wait a moment sweetheart, someone will be here to talk to you. they'll be so happy to see you," you could hear that guy smirk. when you got out of this situation, you would make sure you pinned his fucking balls to the wall.
you could feel their presence leave the room, and you went straight to your radio.
"price, you there?" you lowered your voice, not knowing when they could come back.
"shadow, where are you? you should've made it back by now." price responded.
"i've been captured. i'm in some big house, in better shape than all the houses around. it's not that far from the rv point. it's on the route i was taking."
"fucking hell. how many are there? you hurt?"
"i don't know. there was three men bringing me in, said they were going to go get someone. i haven't been hurt- yet." you heard a door open and slam shut, followed by what you guessed was four people.
"look who we have here. ain't you a pretty one, darling?" you made sure to take your hand off the transmission button after he spoke, so price wouldn't respond and get your radio taken away or even worse, cause you to be moved to a different building.
that must be the guy they retrieved, but what the fuck was he going to do with you. you stayed silent.
"not talkative, huh? been a while since i saw someone as cute as you walking around." you felt a force lift your chin up.
you knew that if you did anything too rash, they would shoot you. it's obvious they don't want you for any intel, so that means you're easily disposable.
"i've been looking for a sweet little girlie like you. wonder what you can do." he released you, and said. "why's her hands not tied?"
"didn't have enough rope, sir. you'll already have her tied up in that bed of yours anyways."
they all burst out in laughter and you frowned in disgust. that's what they were doing? you decided to try and get up, placing your hands on the floor to drag yourself upright, when something sharp pressed against your neck. ironic to be threatened in the same way that you killed one of their men.
"don't try anything." the guy you assumed was their superior crooned into your ear, making you shiver. and not in a good way.
sticking to not speaking, you nodded, and the blade's pressure disappeared from your neck.
"good girl," they praised, but you cringed inwardly. you would've smiled hearing that come from anyone else's mouth, especially a certain someone. a certain someone you wished could come save your ass already, but you haven't seen them in years.
simon really was a ghost. you let out a chuckle at your own thoughts.
"something funny?" another person questioned. you shook your head quickly.
"leave her here. and go get some more rope, you think some rope around her legs are going to stop here from leaving? fucking idiots."
you laid the side of your head down on the ground, and slowly began lifting up the blindfold around your eyes.
you heard the scrape of a chair, and then the guy, who you were going to call, "the boss", sat down with a sigh.
"who do you work for?" he asked. "nevermind, that's a stupid question. i bet you're with those fucking assholes who killed our leader."
you smirked a little. little did he know you were said asshole who killed him.
"fuck this. those bastards can't find anything even if it was up their ass." you could hear the rustle of clothes as he stood up and felt him grip your wrist.
"what the fuck are you doing?" you spat. you could take him on in a fight as long as no one walked in with a weapon.
"the only reason why you're still alive babe, is beca-" he was cut off by the sound of yelling and gunshots.
"is that your fucking friends?" you heard him growl.
you shrugged. "probably," you cheerily agreed as you grabbed onto his hand that was on your wrist and twisted it as hard as you could, causing him to yelp in pain.
he let go of you and you grabbed your knife, not needing to see where it was due to memory, and quickly cut through the ropes around your ankles, standing up before the boss tackled you, pinning you to the floor.
you didn't need to see to quickly flip him over, trained in being able to overpower even the strongest person. you brought your legs over his back and used your weight and his momentum to make you the one on top. you didn't know if he still had his knife on him, and didn't take any chances. you brought your blade down on his leg, and he howled.
taking this chance, you ripped the blindfold off and made eye contact with the person in front you, some ragged looking person who could be in his late 30s.
"disgusting." you spat as he held his leg, tears streaming down his face. you saw no weapon on him, and you weren't going to wait around for someone else to come along and attack you.
you got up, getting rope and tying his wrists together, doing what he and his men didn't do to you, and you knew he wasn't going to be walking anywhere anytime soon. you put the blindfold around his mouth and held a finger up to your lips.
"you should be more fucking quiet like a good boy." you stood up, running out the room with your gun to the commotion coming from the front of the house.
peering out from a corner to make sure you weren't going to run out into a bunch of bullets, you saw a familiar man with a mask, and four men on the floor, one in the grasp of who you never expected to see.
"nice to see you're alive, rookie." ghost said as the man he carried crumpled to the ground.
"rookie?" you raised an eyebrow, only to realize he couldn't see you do that since half of your face was covered.
"got a mask of your own?" he walked up to you, and he still had so much height over you, looking down at you as you looked up.
"personally, i think mine is much cooler. it looks better on me." you laughed.
"shadow, you there?"
"nice call sign, shadow," ghost let the name roll of his tongue and your cheeks heated up.
pressing a button, you responded.
"i'm here, price. is this your little surprise?"
"couldn't stop him from going. he was eager to retrieve you."
you shot a questioning look at simon, who wasn't looking at you anymore, but instead looking if anyone else was in the house.
"what are you even doing here?" you asked ghost.
"well, i came to help you guys find someone for your next mission, but i think you already found him," he pointed behind you, and you turned to see the piece of shit crawling over to the two of you. how he even made it this far was beyond you, using his soldiers to propel himself forward.
"this fucking bitch?" you scoffed.
"i see the two of you already met," he noted the stab wound in the man's leg and the rope around his wrists.
"you wouldn't believe what he wanted to do with me."
ghost narrowed his eyes.
"he wanted to do something with you?"
"how else do you think i'm alive right now?"
"sheer will. i heard you've gotten good at close combat." ghost went over to the man and crouched over, and the guy looked up in terror.
"what the fuck should we do with you?" he hummed.
"do we have to bring him back alive?" you asked. you would not hesitate to lift your gun and shoot him.
ghost didn't respond, instead going back over to you, placing a hand on your shoulder that made you jump in surprise. the last time you were this close was when he was taking debris out your arm on that first mission.
"do whatever you want. we don't need him."
you grinned. "yes, lieutenant."
☆☆.
you were happy to be back on the base. that was probably the biggest stroke of luck you've ever had, being captured by the stupidest enemies you've ever seen, and by so few of them being at the house with you.
price was happy to see you back, and presented the prize you already knew about.
"aren't you happy to see ghost?"
"beyond elated. i'm currently pissing my pants of joy right now." the sentence might've sounded sarcastic, but you broke out into a huge smile.
looking over at ghost, you saw his eyes had a glimmer of amusement in them.
"i'll be in the other room. come over if you need me,"
you took off your balaclava and tactical vest and weapons as soon as you got in the room, sitting down on the cot. as soon as you swung your legs up and laid down to take a short nap, a rapid series of knocks sounded at the door.
you groaned, going over to open it to reveal ghost.
"simon?"
"can i come in?" he said gruffly.
you gestured for him to make his way in, and you shut the door.
"anything you want, lieutenant?" you emphasized his rank, still remembering the first time the two of you met.
"you ever gonna show me some respect, shadow?"
you held a hand to your heart, letting out a dramatic gasp. "me? not showing you respect? let me apologize."
you could see his eyes roll.
"since you seem like you were going to take a nap, i want to do some close combat with you. need to see how good you got since you were a rookie." it sounded less of an invitation and more of a demand.
"you asking me as a superior or am i allowed to decline?" you put your hands on your hips, tilting your head.
"are you really going to say no?"
"absolutely not. anything to fucking beat your ass."
☆☆.
the two of you were lying on the floor, and you were sweating. hard.
"thought you were better with guns, simon." you exhaled.
"thought you were better at hand-to-hand combat," he retorted.
you glared at him. "i will pulverize your ass."
he didn't reply, and you took the chance to get up and make him get up also.
"one more. whoever wins gets bragging rights."
"bragging rights?" he questioned, but you already began throwing punches and attempting to get him to fall.
he blocked majority of them, but you didn't let him have a chance to get offensive, instead opting to simply go for his waist and push him to the floor, with you attached. this led to you bear hugging his waist, your face in his chest.
you accidentally took a huge inhale through your nose, and you could smell him. he smelled like gunpowder, dust, and. . . wood?
"are you fucking sniffing me, y/n?"
"well, i'm fucking breathing, aren't i?" you could feel him attempt to flip you over but you kept yourself grounded.
"fucking christ. check where your legs are at." ghost groaned, and you peered down to see your leg against. . .
"holy shit, i'm so fucking sorry," ghost took this opportunity to successfully flip you over, and now you were pinned down again. for the second time today, too.
the space between you too was so small, and you could feel his body pressing on yours. your breathing sped up at the distance.
you've been infatuated with the masked man ever since you met him, never being able to forget those moments you had with him. those times you got to work with him, which was barely, had you cherishing those memories of him.
price obviously caught on, which was why he was calling ghost a prize. a prize you were happy to get today.
ghost could tell the look on your face with your half-lidded eyes and parted lips.
he leaned even closer.
"something wrong?" you could hear the smirk.
"fuck off," you turned your face to the side.
"look at me." you immediately went back to glare at him, but you couldn't with how close you were. "i asked you a question."
"nothing's wrong, ghost."
"so if i checked your heartbeat, it would be normal?"
"you trying to touch me, lieutenant?"
"so what if i am?" you had no response to that, opening and closing your mouth, trying to find the words to represent how you were feeling.
the two of you stayed in silence, just like usual, until you broke it.
"can i kiss you?" you murmured.
"close your eyes." you did as he said, and heard the sound of his mask being pulled up, followed by the feeling of his lips pressing against yours. he didn't let go off you wrists, leaving you to have to lean forward to return the kiss.
you kissed as if you had been thinking about this for years, which you had, and he kissed as if this was something that his life depended on. something that he's needed and has been craving desperately.
you never opened your eyes, waiting for the moment he decides to show you himself on his own terms. besides, doesn't it add to the mystery?
he pulled away much quicker than you wanted him to, pouting. you heard him as he slipped his mask back on and told you to open your eyes.
"sorry gorgeous. remember, i'm too pretty to be showing you my face. might dazzle you too much."
you laughed.
"i'm always ready to be dazzled by you, simon. you've dazzled me since the moment we met."
"oh really? you like it when guys insult you?"
"makes me feel like i've done something." you accepted the hand he held out to help you up as he stood.
"definitely have done something to me," he spoke to himself.
you grinned. seems like you both can dazzle people.
☆☆.
i absolutely despise this. i apologize sm
tags !!
@urfavsunkissedleo @shyyxzi
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honeyhotteoks · 1 year ago
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i'm just...... going to rant under the cut for a minute because people have been on my last nerve today BUT for all of you lovely readers of TNT who are kind and wonderful, i want you to know i wrote basically all day today and i'm making progress on more!!
anyways ranting under the cut...
tw - discussion about homophobia/rude comments etc.
so i received a pretty aggressive anon message earlier about the sanhwa scene in TNT... and i already deleted it because honestly i found it fairly offensive, but to that anon if you're reading this.... not cool. i understand that not all people are into m/m fic... but telling me it was ruining the fic and that i should have been clearer about tagging and warnings? it's genuinely been bothering me all day and kind of offending me. i write m/m pairings as part of my work all the time - you can see it in aurora, and definitely in my husbands series (fucking obviously).... and it's going to keep happening.
while i would never assume the real members sexualities (it's obviously none of our business), these are fictional characters and representations. they can be whatever i want them to be IN FICTION. if that offends you or troubles you or isn't sending the plot in the way you want, go find something else to read.
i also should not have to mark an m/m relationship in a fic with the same severity as a trigger warning. it isn't triggering, it's a relationship pairing. if you prefer other pairings, go elsewhere, but don't expect me to bend over backwards in my work on my blog to make queerness palatable for you.
this combined with some frankly rude messages on ao3 are just doing me in today. i understand that not everyone wanted to go down the woosanhwa road, but i wrote this fic for me and that's what i wanted. their relationship is meant as an intentional foil for yungi, the heats are supposed to be starkly different to help the MC understand herself and her feelings. y/n isn't perfect nor are any of the other characters and that's the fun of it. if you just want smut, find one-shots to read.
i just want to remind people that if you're writing comments on ao3, putting comments in your tumblr reblogs, etc., the author is going to read them!! be kind. if you don't like something, stop reading. your constructive criticism / helpful suggestions aren't necessary, they're rude. i'm not a published author, i'm a random on the internet posting fic for free, i don't want or need your negativity or your supposed help. you need to get a hobby or try writing something yourself.
anyways that's it. i'm kind of shocked at how negative a few of y'all have been given how overwhelmingly kind and positive everyone else has been. but i'm beyond shocked at the thinly veiled homophobia in my ask box earlier. what you said you said to a queer person and it hurt, and very quietly i'd like to ask you to do better and to not message me like that ever again.
i'm going to go back to writing now. and if there's a wild gay makeout session later in this fic, it's fucking dedicated to you.
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