#I literally wrote this in 2 hours and im tired but im posting it anyway idc if its cringe

[v1ct0r1an]

A Graduation Present

Now, Minute doesn’t always know what to expect from his brother. They don’t talk often. Spoke is way too busy doing tours to spend time with family which is expected from a wanna-be rock star. It’s not like his brother even meshes with the rest of their immediate family either. He’s always been loud and abrasive, always brushing aside school for his dream.

So, imagine Minute’s surprise when he sees Spoke at his graduation. He didn’t even invite him, he’s certain no one did. The guy just showed up. On second thought, it’s not all that surprising actually. Minute had made local news with a couple other students featuring as “top graduates”.

What’s actually confusing is why Spoke is walking over to him with an egg cradled in his arms, looking like living death.

“Hey Spo-” Minute doesn’t even have time to finish his greeting before the very same egg is shoved into his arms. His brother has this dumb smile on his face despite pallid, almost sickly look. He clears his throat, carefully looking over the egg before his eyes flit to Spoke’s. “Uhm, what’s this exactly?”

“A pokemon egg, duh,” Spoke answers like Minute didn’t already know that. It makes him grit his teeth.

“Okay, but what’s in it?” Minute asks, his pale eyes narrowing with suspicion.

Spoke scoffs and crosses his arms. “If I told you, that’d ruin your graduation surprise,” He states, rolling his eyes. He laughs to himself a bit as if he was being funny. It only makes Minute more suspicious.

“So we’re trolling?” He assumes out loud, drawing out the “so”. He doesn’t believe for a second that this will be a good surprise. He takes note of how light the egg is. It’s only a few pounds and he can even feel movement inside. Spoke must’ve been carrying the thing around for a while before handing it off to him.

“I would never,” Spoke retorts, looking away, lying. “Listen, little brother of mine, I just wanted to give you a present for graduating! Is that really a bad thing?”

Minute sighs and adjusts his hold on the egg. He doesn’t want to risk dropping it, even if pokemon eggs are rather sturdy. “No,” He says reluctantly. “I just don’t get why. Like, why a pokemon and not anything else?”

“Hey, hey, what’s a better gift than a brand spanking new member for your party?” Spoke asks in return. That shit-eating grin of his hasn’t left. Seldom does Minute ever see him not smiling; whenever he does see him that is.

“So it’ll be useful?” Minute queries. If this mystery pokemon is expected to join his team, then it must be something with potential. Something strong.

“Depends on how you use it. I’ve found it very useful on my team. Anyway-” Spoke chuckles to himself, his gaze flitting away from Minute and across the room, obviously distracted. “Do you think the school would let me perform here?”

“Probably not,” Minute states, still caught up on the fact that this is from one of the pokemon on his brother’s own team. What could it possibly be? A Toxel, maybe? A Grooky? Noibat or Kricketot perhaps. The egg is certainly heavier than he expects a Kricketot egg to feel so he thinks can knock that off the list immediately. The other three certainly do have potential…

“Oh,” Spoke sighs, his shoulders slumping but he still looks infuriatingly joyous. He straightens up right away though, not one to be caught even the slightest bit dejected, and pats Minute on the shoulder, making the other tense up a bit.

Spoke is surprisingly strong for how thin he looks. It makes Minute think the ghoulish look might just be an aesthetic thing. “Well, I’m proud of you for making it through, little bro,” He states, his eyes crinkling as he grins and Minute, for once, does believe him.

“Yeah, thanks. It was actually pretty easy,” Minute says, feigning nonchalance. It makes Spoke’s face scrunch up a little.

“Well- I’m glad you managed to get through it,” Spoke bites out, his voice is slightly restrained and Minute can just tell he’s annoyed him.

It makes him smile back.

Out in the crowd around the two, Minute can spot Jumper right away just by seeing her Hoppip hair bow. And also by her all pink attire. She really sticks out in the sea of graduation robes and well dressed parents. “Well, I think I’ve got to go now,” Minute says to Spoke, taking the first step back.

“Oh, really? You can’t spare a few more minutes with your brother? Not even a thank you?” Spoke asks and Minute hesitates to even show a hint of appreciation for this mystery egg.

Through gritted teeth Minute manages a “fine. Thanks,” before he hurries off to meet with his friend. He manages to catch her by the elevator while Spoke just watches until they’ve lost sight of each other.

“Hey Minute, having fun?” Jumper asks as he rolls up the sleeves of her sweater. Minute can see her eyes catch on the egg in his arms before they meet his eyes.

“Yeah. I ran into Spoke just a second ago too,” He mentions. He holds out the egg a bit and Jumper nods as she narrows her eyes.

“Really? I could’ve sworn he was touring Galar this week though,” She says. With a hum of confusion she looks around but Spoke is already long gone, either lost and trying to find his way out of the building or he’s straight up left.

“I didn’t know that,” Minute mutters. He looks down at the odd egg and as much as it pains him to even think it: Spoke had actually been sweet for once. Even worse, he feels a pang of guilt for not thanking him properly. It’s probably too late now to try and find him though. “He gave me this. Wanna head over to Professor Mystic’s with me tomorrow? I need to find out how long this thing has until it hatches.”

And Jumper nods, always ready to go along with whatever plans are presented. “That sounds good to me. Oh- and can we stop and get some Casteliacones on the way? I just need to grab a couple treats for the team.”

“Sure. I mean, it’s on the way there already,” Minute agrees with a shrug. He was planning on dropping by somewhere for some rage candy bars anyway.

[jellyaibo]

ok so disclaimer: i literally started writing this almost immediately after i woke up so there will be a bunch of typos which i dont bother fixing cuz im still very tired

had a dream where tpot 3 came out and i think it was 2 hours long and it was this HUGE bfdi finale video that had ALL the bfb characters (except…the tpot guys???? excluding 2 they were here at some point i think) i remember not watching the whole thing cuz it was fucking late at night so i skipped to near the end but right before i did there was this ?? intro to the episode where its just cary in front of a greenscreen thianking everyone who watched battle for dream island and when he said this an image was shown on screen that looked like the "I HATE CHOCOLATE" lady from asoingbob. anyways before ihe could continue i skipped REALLY far in the video where 4 and x have everyone gathered by a stage

(drew this on my phone sorry it looks like dogshit i didnt feel like redrawing it SKDJHFSDJF)

he was gonna reveal…something?? but before that he started doing this REALLY sarcastic and 4th wall breaking speech that basically made fun of the osc and people that didn't like post split??? it was so fuckunf weird it felt like cary/michael/whoever wrote this was having a breakdown while writing yhat. but thankfully it was just a joke thing and all the contestants hated him for that because i think at some point during the speech 4 started making fun of them too??? i swear they described everyone as "marketable disney stereotypes" and went off abt each one like. ok

while listing off each contestants flaws on stage, loser suddenly TRIES TO interrupt 4 multiple times but it doesn't rlly work out (plus her voice is different?? kinda… i described it as "more manly and…hunk-y sounding" so take that wgat you will)

anyways loser was fed up w this and stands up to 4 and getd all of the other contestants to GET THEIR FUVKING ASS so all the contestants get up onto the stage and start destroying the thing that was under that tarp (it was some kind of bad machine thing?) and the whole time this was happening 4 was just going "ohhhh oh nooo" in the most deadpan monotone voice possible. and ooohh this descrution scene ends with loser flinging himself AND CAKE up into the air like this was some anime shit and she slammed into the machine with one fist while holding cake in the other arm. this made me fucking get out of my bed and start punching shit (very positive) oh my god i was freaking the fuck out here

i remember i coudlnt stop replaying that scene NOT ONLY CUZ IT WAS THE FIRST LOSER & CAKE INTERACTION IN . A FUCKING WHILE but i also wanted to take a screenshot of cake's face cuz he had the funniest expression (too lazy to draw it but he was blushing SO MUCH and also screaming cuz he was falling w loser) BUT I COULDNT TAKE A GOOD FUCKING SCREENSHOT SO. MOST OF THE REST OF THIS DREAM WAS ME ANXIOUSLY TRYING TO GET A SCREENSHOT OF THIS FUCKING THIGN. oh yeah also cake's design was slightly different, he just had a white (or light yellow) center rather than a darker brown one.

then after i THINK i managed to grab a screenshot i went on a rant w lan abot how forced??? loser's little arc felt cuz there was no buildup ig and i just ended up complaining abt post splt and how bad jnjs writing was

THE END thats all i remember, i woke up drenched in fcking sweat at 2 am cuz of this (/hj itsalso just really hot in my room)

[quantumfeat72]

hey what’s up i’m depressed and i want to do art but my wrist is still sensitive and i don’t trust myself to start working on comics at the risk of re-injuring it so if y’all have OCs send me a ref and i’ll do a shitty colored sketch like this one here because that was actually really fun and i want to participate in something joyful

i can’t promise i’ll get to everyone since idk if i’ll get a lot/any requests but i’ll do up to five today unless my wrist starts hurting again.  restrictions: you have to have a reference of some kind, i will be posting the sketches so don’t request if you’re not ok with that, it doesn’t have to be your oc but tell me if it’s not (and make sure the person who designed them is ok with this), au versions of existing characters count as ocs for this but i won’t do a genderbent chara or frisk (undertale) or kris (deltarune), and as always keep it sfw

[hookingminor]

4 times his friends posted you on their instagram + 1 time he did - mat barzal

a/n: I wrote this literally back in july so lets just ignore how idealistic this is regarding quarantine but im a slut for some barzy this is all fluff

word count: 4,733

summary: like the title says, some friends (with benefits?) to lovers + a tyson cameo, fluffy summer quarantine fic

tagging @davidpastrsnack​ so kate can get on the barzy train

-

1.

To say the whole quarantine thing was an inconvenience was an understatement. School had ended online, your summer internship was cancelled, and it seemed like your summer would turn into an uneventful couple of months stuck in your apartment in, probably, the worst place to be stuck in during a pandemic: New York City.

Or so you thought.

You’d planned on having the most boring summer ever until your friend, Mat, had invited you to hole up away with him and a few friends in a lake house back in Vancouver. Well, friend was a loose term. The two of you were friends… just ones that kissed occasionally… and sometimes more than kissed. You’d met him about a year ago at a bar while he was out with his teammates after a game. A cliche meeting, but you hit it off instantly. Instead of ending up in his bed at the end of the night (which you would eventually end up at after a couple months), it turned into an exchange of numbers and an invitation to hang out later in the week.

You hadn’t thought anything of it at first, just thinking he was being friendly and wanting to end the conversation, so you were surprised to get a text the next day from an unknown number asking if you’d wanted to go on a bike ride.

Flashforward a year later and the two of you still went on bike rides together. At least, up until the pandemic started.

When the text came telling you to pack your bags for a month or so, you thought he was joking. Surely he couldn’t have meant you to join him in Vancouver over the summer? You were proven wrong when he showed up at your apartment the next day, two coffees in his hand.

“Uh, hi, Mathew,” you said hesitantly, opening your door to reveal your disheveled state, having just woken up.

“Why are you dressed like that? We have a plane to catch in four hours,” he said, pushing himself through your door, uninvited, to set the coffees on the counter.

“What are you doing here? What plane? You’re not supposed to be going out,” you reprimanded him for showing up unannounced and in the middle of quarantine.

“I told you we’re going to Vancouver, I know you read my text. Now let’s hurry up and pack, we gotta get going,” Mat rushed, already on the way to your bedroom.

You followed him after a brief moment once you’d processed what was going on. Mat had already pulled out your suitcase and set it on top of your bed by the time you entered the door. He was in the middle of rifling through your drawers and grabbing random garments to throw into the suitcase when you’d spoken again.

“You’re actually serious about this?”

“Of course I am. What better things do you have to do in a city on lockdown for an entire summer? Honestly, I’m doing you a favor,” he explained easily, turning back to grab more items.

“Oh, you’re doing me a favor? Thank you, Mat, for saving me from a summer of suffering. It’s not like I had other plans to find different internships or focus on my summer classes,” you replied sarcastically.

Mat rolled his eyes. “I am doing you a favor, and you’re doing me a favor by going. I need a hot piece of ass to get me through this, or I will lose my mind.” You slugged him on the shoulder in offense, but all he did was chuckle.

“And anyways, you can still do your classes in Vancouver. Instead of doing them locked in this apartment, you can do them lounged out under the Canadian sun. Preferably in a bikini,” he finished. You slugged his arm again, harder this time.

“In fact, you should take the red bikini, it makes your tits look amazing,” he said, noticing you shuffling through your swimsuits. You rolled your eyes at him but grabbed the red one anyway along with a couple others.

With both of you folding and packing, your bags were ready to go in record time.

“Alright, baby, let’s go.” And so you were off.

A week had gone by in total bliss. As much as you hated to admit it, Mat was right. Vacationing in Vancouver in a secluded lake house was a lot better than being alone in your apartment, even if you did still have classes to do. Mat teased you about it, but he always left you alone for a few hours in the day for you to focus on your work. Unless he really wanted something… like right now.

Mat had joined you laying on the couch while you were in the middle of annotating a book for class. He wiggled his way between your arms, causing you to break your hold on your book. He rested his head on your chest, arms wrapped around your middle, and nuzzled his face into your neck. Joining your hands back to your book and bringing your highlighter to the page, you continued to underline phrases you’d come back to later. A couple minutes passed in silence before Mat started sighing. And then he sighed again.

“What do you want?” you huffed out, closing your book with the pen marking your page.

“Let’s go swimming,” he said, pushing up to his elbows to look at your face.

“I have to finish, like, three more chapters today,” you explained.

“You can do that later. I want to go swimming now,” Mat whined.

“You know you sound like a petulant child right now, right?” you asked, moving a hand to his head, pushing his hair back as he pouted.

“Stop using big words on me. Let’s swim,” he said, rolling his eyes.

You paused to think about it for a moment, “Hmm… okay, I guess,” you said with a smile. Mat returned your smile with one of his own before hopping up to drag you to your room to change. It didn’t take much to convince you to swim. It was a really nice day out, and you didn’t really care to finish reading about 17th century philosophy.

You changed into your red bikini, Mat swapped his shorts for a pair of swim trunks, and threw on a backwards baseball cap. You went out back to join the rest of his friend group, who were in the process of loading up the boat with supplies and equipment.

“Oh, look, if it isn’t Brainiac and the Beast. Are you two finally going to go boating with us?” Tyson shouted from the dock. You rolled your eyes at his nickname they created for you and Mat. It had only been a week in Vancouver, but the chirps about you and school were tired by now.

“Princess here wants to swim in the pool, maybe next time!” you shouted back, pointing to Mat.

They laughed at your response, turning their attention back to the boat and running supplies to and from the house. You turned your attention back to Mat, who was taking off his hat and was about two seconds away from jumping in the pool.

“Mathew, stop!” you yelled out, “Get your ass over here!”

“What is it?” he asked, stopping just short of the deep end. He grumbled before marching over to you.

“You need to put sunscreen on first, dumbass,” you reprimanded. As you turned your back to grab the bottle of sunscreen, he rolled his eyes.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me, Mat,” you said sharply, turning back to face him with a raised eyebrow.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, baby.”

You ignored him, opening the cap and squeezing lotion onto your hands. You gestured him to turn around, and you spread the lotion over it, making sure to rub it into his shoulders.

“I don’t see why I have to put sunscreen on. It’s not even that hot outside,” he muttered.

“First of all, you’re a dumbass. Second of all, heat doesn’t automatically mean the UV rays aren’t strong. And lastly, you’re white, baby, you’ll burn like a sun-dried tomato and being in water only increases the amount of sun you’re exposed to,” you explained, reaching up to rub some on his face.

“Sorry, Miss Meteorologist,” he grumbled, clearly not happy he’d lost this argument.

“One of us has to have brains. We can’t all get by on our good looks and skating ability,” you replied, slapping his cheeks when you were done for good measure.

“Okay, well, if you’re finally done,” you nodded in confirmation, “Let’s go.” He picked you up from under your thighs and ran at full speed towards the pool before you could even process what was happening. You screamed his name in protest begging him to put you down, claiming you hadn’t had time to put on sunscreen yet. He ignored you as he jumped into the deep end, dragging you with him.

You emerged from the water clinging to Mat’s wet body, your hair sopping and hanging over your face like you had come straight out of the movie The Grudge. Mat was laughing at your chaotic look, knowing you were well pissed at him. You jumped higher in the water on top of him to dunk his head under and tried your best to drown him.

It wasn’t until you were relaxing on the couch later that night doing your routinely social media scroll that you saw one of the guys recorded your sunscreen interaction by the pool, you calling Mat a dumbass, and him throwing you in the pool onto their instagram story with a caption “all these two do is fight” with some laughing crying emojis added for effect.

2.

After a long day or hiking, you’d immediately crashed on the couch once you’d gotten back to the house, not bothering to walk all the way to your room. It was only early in the afternoon but you’d been out since sunrise, and dealing with people for hours on end had drained you. The group laughed at you as you plopped your body down onto the couch, curling your head under your arm instead of grabbing the pillow two feet away from you. The rest of them gathered in the kitchen, refueling their bodies with assorted snacks as they started popping open bottles of beer, ready to start the night. It seemed that even an entire day on their feet had not emptied them of their, seemingly endless, energy.

“Jesus Christ, we hiked for, like, six hours and you’re all still bouncing off the walls,” you sighed deeply.

“We’re about to go hit the boat and go water skiing, too. I’m assuming you’re too tired to join us?” Tyson teased.

“I will not be joining you because unlike some people, I need a nap. Now get out of here, you’re all giving me a headache,” you said, pinching your fingers on the bridge of your nose to emphasize your point.

They all snickered but kept quiet as they shuffled around, packing up more food to take outside. You heard the sliding door shut and close a few times as they ran in and out before it was finally silent. You let out a sigh of relief as you took solace in the calm quiet.

That was until you felt a pair of arms shifting you closer to the edge of the couch. You peeked one eye open to see Mat rolling your body over to give him some space as he climbed over your body to nestle himself between you and the back cushions.

“Not going out on the boat?” You asked as he tucked a pillow under the both of your heads and pulled a blanket over your bodies.

“No. They’re exhausting. I need some time for myself,” Mat replied, wrapping his arm around your middle to pull you into his chest.

“No offense, but if you’re with me, you’re not by yourself,” you explained, closing your eyes again as you settled into a comfortable position.

“Yeah, but you’re you. You don’t exhaust me,” he said quietly. You didn’t know what to say to that, so you didn’t answer. Within a few seconds you heard Mat’s breathing even out, and you followed quickly behind him into a deep sleep.

-

A couple hours passed in a dreamless sleep when you heard the sliding of doors and laughter travel through the house. It stirred you from your sleep and you both shifted around, letting out displeased groans.

“Are they both still asleep?” You heard one of them ask from the kitchen. Neither of you wanted to answer in hopes they would leave you two to continue sleeping.

You were sadly mistaken.

“Hey! Sleeping beauties! Time to get up!” Tyson shouted from somewhere above you.

You both groaned out a “Fuck off, Tyson,” without opening your eyes, both of you giving him the middle finger. Tyson laughed to himself and you expected him to keep bothering you, but you heard his footsteps lead away from the couch. You turned over on your other side, tucking your face into Mat’s neck before falling back asleep.

-

When you woke up later that evening, you checked instagram again to see Tyson posted a new story. It was the video of him bothering you two and flipping him off with a caption that said “I get no respect around here :(“

3.

It had been raining all day. Which meant everyone was stuck inside watching movies and eating pizza. It didn’t take long for you to get bored of lounging on the couch, especially when all they wanted to do was watch Fast and Furious movies. You sat on the loveseat you were sharing with Mat, and you distracted yourself from the boring movie by tangling your hands in your hair, French braiding the strands into pigtails mindlessly. You unbraided and rebraided your hair into a fishtail after the pigtails, and then into a regular braided ponytail after that. You let yourself get caught up in daydreams as you stared blankly at the TV when Mat started tugging on your leg. Dropping your braid, you finished tying it off with a hair tie and turned to look at him.

“Let me practice on you,” Mat said quietly.

“Practice what?” You asked.

“Braiding,” he said, shuffling to sit upright. He tried to gently push you off the couch until you got the hint and moved to sit between his legs on the floor.

“You think you can do it?” You asked, ready to offer him a demonstration.

“I’ve been watching you for the past half hour, I got this,” he replied, pulling out your hair tie. You rolled your eyes at his confidence, but let him continue unraveling the strands.

Every few minutes Mat would sigh exasperatedly before pulling out the twists he’d made to start over. Eventually, he’d almost gotten all the way to the end of your hair before he sighed again, clearly fed up by how long this was taking him. You didn’t say anything as he restarted for a third time, going for a straight back braid instead of a French braid.

After another ten minutes, Mat had finally completed his simple braid, tying your hair off with the tie. He tapped your shoulder to indicate he was done, and you pulled the long tail over your shoulder to look at it.

It was a braid.

An extremely loose one where he mixed up the strand order in a couple places, but a braid nonetheless. You turned around to get back up on the couch, and you were met with his triumphant smile.

“Good job, bud,” you complimented, leaving the braid in as you resumed your previous position on the couch.

-

You checked your phone to find a notification of a new story tag. You opened the app to see a picture of you on the floor, staring at the TV while Mat had his hands twisted in your hair and a confused look on his face and tongue poking out of his mouth. Next to your instagram tag was “he’s been knotting her hair on purpose for 20 minutes now”

4.

Your final exams for the summer classes you were taking were in a week. Finals stressed you out more than anything else in the world, and when you were stressed, you did a lot of baking. A lot of baking. After finishing your finals study schedule and nearly breaking down almost twice because of the amount you had to get done, you decided to start baking instead of going to sleep. So, at 3 in the morning when everyone was asleep, you’d  turned on the oven and brought out the bowls.

It began with a few dozen cookies. You figured everyone could at least enjoy the cookies. Who didn’t like cookies?

Cookies turned into muffins, muffins into cupcakes, and then cupcakes into pies. By the time everyone was waking up, it was nearly eleven in the morning. You’d gone to the store twice and had taken a few twenty minute naps while you waited for your desserts baked in the oven. And right now, you were in the middle of finishing off some cinnamon rolls for breakfast

“Oh my god, what the hell happened here?” Mat had asked with a scared expression, taking note of the disastrous kitchen. You didn’t answer him as you were topping off the rolls with some icing.

A few more bodies had gathered in the kitchen and began to fill the seats at the countertop while they watched you with worried eyes.

“What?” You asked innocently, placing the plates of cinnamon rolls in front of all of them. Their eyes followed you carefully as you pulled more goods out of the oven where you were keeping them warm. Plate after plate you set on the counter, all the cookies and muffins and cakes.

“How long have you been up?” Tyson asked cautiously. You swear you’ve never heard him use a softer voice than right now.

“I’m not sure. I never went to sleep, I guess? What time is it now?” You asked, pulling out glasses for orange juice.

“Nearly noon. You seriously didn’t sleep?” Tyson asked. The others had delved into the confections, eyes bouncing between the two of you as they stuffed their faces.

“She’s stress baking,” Mat replied quietly, helping himself to a cinnamon roll.

“What the hell is tress baking?” One of the other guys asked.

“Yeah she does this when she’s stressed. Usually when finals are coming up,” Mat said, directing it more towards you than his friend. You gave him a sheepish look, deciding not to comment since he already answered for you.

Mat was used to your stress baking as it resulted in you showing up at his place in the middle of the night with bags full of pastries in the late hours of the evening. It was always against his diet and he frequently gave most of your desserts to his neighbor, but he could never tell you no when you arrived with gifts.

“Well, I’m all out of flour, so, I’m going to run to the store again to get some more supplies so I can make a chocolate cake later,” you said hurriedly.

You did a quick double check of the kitchen, flashing all the guys a bright smile before heading out the door with your purse in hand, all of them staring until the front door shut behind you.

-

When you came back, you found Mat in the kitchen doing the dishes and nearly all the sweets you’d baked earlier were eaten or wrapped and put away. Maybe there was a plus side to being in a home with five other people.

“Mat, you don’t have to do that,” you said, setting your groceries down and hip checking him away from the sink.

“You’re already stressed, I figured doing the dishes would take away some of that,” he said with a shrug. He continued rinsing out some bowls as you gave him a small smile.

The two of you continued to wash the dishes in silence, moving to clean the countertops when you were done. After half an hour, the mess you’d made was gone and any signs of a baking breakdown had been erased.

It was a shame you were about to tear up the kitchen all over again.

“How about this,” Mat said, noticing the frown on your face at the thought of making another mess, “Let’s have a competition.”

You quirked your eyebrow, “I’m listening.”

“You said you were making a chocolate cake, right? How about we see who can make the better cake,” Mat propositioned.

You raised both your eyebrows this time. You both knew you were the better baker by a long shot. You did have this same breakdown at least twice a year. You weren’t even sure Mat knew how to make anything that didn’t come with box instructions or included possible salmonella-inducing ingredients.

You knew what he was really trying to do. He was trying to distract you from all the stress, and he knew you couldn’t turn down a competition. You were just as bad as him when it came to winning. Thankfully, this was something you knew you’d win.

“Fine, but I hope you’re prepared to lose,” you agreed with a smile.

“I don’t know, I have been practicing my cooking skills lately,” he said, grabbing the bowls he’d just dried off.

“Yeah, I’ll believe that when I see it,” you replied with an eye roll and heavy sarcasm.

You joined him in gathering all the ingredients and materials on the counter, setting up your respective stations. Mat divided the workspace in half, drawing a line in flour which made you laugh. You split the bowls between the sides and set up the ingredients on the second counter just like an actual cooking show.

“Okay, ground rules first. Half an hour to make the cakes, we bake them at the same time, and then another half hour for decorating at the end,” you explained, tying your hair back in a ponytail. Mat nodded at your statement and set a timer on his phone for 30 minutes.

“Ready.”

“Set.”

“Go!”

-

After about two hours, your creations were done. Well, they were supposed to be. Mat’s cake looked more or less like a brown lump coated in frosting and stripes. You’d tried your best to decorate yours with small chocolate roses, but you could’ve turned out a plain cake and probably would have done better.

“I think I won,” you stated confidently.

“You’re not allowed to decide, you’re biased! I’ll make a poll on my story,” Mat said, going to grab his phone.

“You can’t do that, your followers are going to pick yours.”

“Fine, we’ll get someone else to do it— Josty! Come here,” Mat called to his friend passing through the kitchen. He hesitantly walked over to where you were, not wanting to come in the middle of whatever you two were shouting about.

“We need you to make an instagram poll to see who’s cake looks better. Oh, and you’re going to taste test them,” you said, picking up your cake to pose for a picture as Mat did the same. Tyson sighed before realizing you two were serious and he opened his app to take a picture.

He added the photo to his story with a poll asking “Which one is better?” With two options, Y/N’s or Mat’s.

After you set the cakes back down, Tyson picked up a fork before stabbing them to pick out a chunk from each. He ate yours first, nearly moaning at the taste.

“Holy shit, this is, like, the best cake I’ve ever eaten,” Tyson said, shoveling down another forkful. You gave Mat a shit-eating grin.

“Okay, okay, try mine now,” Mat said, displeased. Tyson rolled his eyes before forking out some of his.

“Uh,” he coughed, “it’s a little,” cough, “dry.”

“What? No, it’s not! Let me try,” Mat shouted, outraged, and grabbed Tyson’s fork to try for himself.

It took him two seconds before he was spitting the cake into a napkin.

“Fine. You win,” Mat conceded, throwing a dish towel against the counter in mock fury.

You gloated for another 5 minutes, pointing out Mat’s terrible baking skills as Tyson continued to eat your cake and laugh at Mat.

You won the instagram poll too.

+ 1

It was the last week before you and Mat were flying back to New York. The past month had passed quickly, and Mat needed to get back for the start of training camps. As the summer began to end, the whole crew thought they’d spend one last day on the boat before everyone started parting ways.

It’s not like you were opposed to being on boats, but when all the guys did was water sports and no one wanted to slow down to teach you, it wasn’t as fun.

Today, however, had been quite calm as you sat against the front of the boat, a seltzer in hand as you watched Tyson wakeboarding in the back. Mat was curled up behind you as you leaned back against his chest, tanned skin shining in the summer sun. You reached back to grab the baseball cap off his head, placing it on yours to shield your eyes from the sun. You’d forgotten to bring sunglasses, and you figured Mat could part with his hat since he had a pair.

The day passed peacefully as all the guys took turns until it was sunset. Mat had joined you back on the seat, skin wet from just getting out of the water. He wrapped you in his arms before pulling you onto his lap, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek.

“Hey, Tys, take a picture of us real quick,” Mat said, shoving his phone into Tyson’s chest.

You thought nothing of it, you and Mat had taken many pictures together, and this was no different. Mat rested his chin on your shoulder, his arms wrapped around your stomach as you both gave your cheesiest smiles to the camera. A quick shutter indicated the picture was taken and Tyson gave Mat his phone back.

-

Mat called your name from your bed as you stood in the adjoined bathroom, finishing your nightly routine.

“Hey, do you mind if I post that picture of us on my instagram?” Mat called out.

“The one from the boat? Why?” You asked, drying off your face with a towel.

“It’s a cute picture,” he shrugged when you reentered the room.

“People are going to start talking if you do,” you warned with a cautious tone.

He paused for a second.

“Would that be such a bad thing?” Mat asked quietly, looking up to meet your eyes.

You stayed silent as you climbed in under the covers.

“What are you trying to say, Mat?”

He took a deep breath, “I think you’re amazing, you know that. And we’ve been friends for so long, it kind of feels natural, doesn’t it?” His fingers began tapping against the sheets anxiously as he held his breath and waited for your response.

You gave him a small smile, moving your body around to fully face him.

“It does,” you agreed, “But if you want us to be something more, you’re going to have to ask me on a date first.”

“A date? After I’ve already gotten you into bed? What’s the point?” You knew he meant it as a joke since he could barely finish the sentence without laughing, but you gently slapped his head as he began to apologize.

“I’m kidding!” He said between chuckles, “Will you go on a date with me once we get back to New York and it’s safe to go out again?”

“I’d love to, Mat,” you replied, leaning in to give him a sweet kiss.

“I’m still going to post that photo tomorrow, though,” he said after a short pause, smiling against your lips.

-

The next day when Mat had gone on a fishing trip with the guys, you saw a notification pop up on your phone.

“@barzal97 tagged you in a photo”

You unlocked your phone.

“Isolation isn’t so bad when you have this girl to spend it with”

[chasseuses]

reasons why i love jade leech part 3

I don't know why I'm doing this again I am a big fool goodbye ☠️ but ahhahahwhahjwhsjfhfjfnfkbdsjbdkdbjd im a doormat for him so. haha. I'll just. fukcignvkjgknv everyone pls look away this is the last post i swear 🤩

Part 1, 2

So.... 🤡 Hi I'm back again with another simp post I'm your local Jade simp and I'm here to point out reasons why I'm an absolute doormat for this eel and why I'm staying as one.

I'M FUCKIFNCGD. SCRVEN AMWIANAJWBAJVWKQVWKAGAKAVDKFBYKDGSKEIANSJAMEINSLENDKEBEKSBEKSHEKDJEKSJRKDJRKDHSKDHKEHSKEBSKEJDLDHDKDBDKHRKDBEKSHEKSUSMS

Ok so, URGFKFHDKDUDKSJSKFHDKGDKDHD if you've been here long enough or something i think i posted something about his initial birthday suit up illustration here which i wrote while i was sobbing and being overly emotional over him.

BUT BASICALLY. IT WAS ABOUT HIS SMILE. I MEAN RTHGJKHJGK JADE LEECH..... SMILING.............N N .VJV.JV. WITHOUT ANY ULTERIOR MOTIVES...... IM FUCKFING DEAD YO!!!!!

HEAR ME OUT. I JUST GJVKJGKVNGKV ... dont u think there's just something about someone as shady as jade who looks shady 90% of the time look like he's not shady for the first time ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

idk if that made sense but yeah.

ALSO IDK IF ANYONE WAS SIMPING HARD ENOUGH TO NOTICE BUT LIKE 😭 IF U COMPARE HIS HANDS TO FLOYD'S THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.

and now if you've known me long enough to know that i am a big fan of his hands, you'll know that i went absolutely crazy over this detail!!!!!! THEY WERE ROUGHER THAN FLOYD'S AND THAT WAS JUSTHGJJGKGKFNKFKGNGKGNFKDDJFKGNGKFJF A DIRECT HIT TO THE GUT WHAT THE FUCK DISPLEX YOU CANT DO THIS TO US 😭😭😭😭😭

do u see the fork he's holding?

yeah

i wanna be that fork so bad

im not even kidding

i legit want to be that fork.

why?

.

haha.

you dont need to know

ANYWAYS. ONTO THE STORY 🥰

we got a lot of lore for the twins this time around and i am tHRIVING :BIBBEK:

"However, and this is unusual for me, but so many people wishing me ‘Happy birthday’ has made me rather embarrassed." HELP?????????&(&!4(£;#(-__8-##(-_(£+£(£ I II I I I I HUCHJWNWISHEJDHWOHSKWGSKSYAKGSKA HI KAUAKSGKAGSKSGSJAYJAGSJAGAJSYSIGSJGSJSHSJAHsks

Their mother!!! Uses!!! -san!!!! At the end of their names!!!!!!! Which got me going 🧐 that is not usual at all!!!!! wtf is going on in the leech household

a lot of ppl theorized mafia stuff and all of that which honestly makes sense imo and also because i find that hella hot HAHSMDGSKDHKSJS mr leech...... 😳 mafia.... HELPGKFJKGJFKF

wait. won't that mean he's rich.

bonus points eyy /j GFJFHFJDHJFNF

"Well, they do say that married couples take after each other… It’s good that they get along well." MR LEECH YOUR HAND IN MARRIAGE RFNJVJKHKGKGKOGJGKVJKFCKIJGKTJKFFJKDHDKXHFFHFJ

guys im losing it

if that wasn't already obvious RHUFHGUF

HELLO????????? ONE OF THE REASONS WHY HE LIKES TERRARIUMS??1?"!"!'! HELPFKVKV CONTROL IT'S CONTROL

"Whether they live or die is also up to me…" i just think.

no i dont think but you get what i mean why the fuck is that line lowkey hot lmfao something is wrong with me

i dont knwo why the fuck but the fact that he likes unpredictability is also kinda????? lmao how boring was ur life that everything u did went exactly your way 😭 how does that bring u amusement i cant relate gomen mr leech

or am i completely wrong idk 🗿 mr leech tell me more about you onegai

Ok honestly, before the birthday card came out, I thought their earrings were like,,, from their parents or something. like heirlooms!! i thought they were precious in that aspect but what i rlly didn't expect is for them to fckinghgkgngknfkf FIGHT A DAMN STURGEON FOR ITS SCALES 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

deadass why would a sturgeon challenge them anyways 🧐 and the twins were just like, "ok sure but can we have your scales if we win" and they rlly did 😭 just how strong were you guys before middle school wtf!!!!

and they turned the scales into earrings 🧐 which is now what they wear!! p cute

they're apparently popular to use as amulets in the coral sea so i. i fucking rotted over this AHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA hrufhfigjofhckfbcjc should i delve deeper into this? no. but perhaps you can find out what my rot is about just by reading this single bullet

"Floyd and I have gone near beaches on nights with fireworks as well." HELEPEHLEPDFKLEGSLDOSODB EGHFKCNDKMCURLDHLDGSMX

WATCHIFNFG FIREOEKSKF WITHHF JADE AJFNJFVJFHKDHF

ohmigod this is getting way longer than intended 🤡 should i continue

yeah fucj it HFJVHFJHCJFHJCJ everybody pls ignore my rot 😌

as all of you know, jade wears purple eyeliner. that's right.

Purple eyeliner.

Why does this matter, you ask? Oh sweet summer child, it may not matter to you but to me—eyeliner is super fucking hot I kid you not I started crying at night when I thought about this and wrote a mini essay about it like a fool so I'm just going to.

I am legitimately losing my shit over this like-?? Who allowed you to fucking put on eyeliner? You're already deadly without them and more so with them.

It honestly makes me wonder if he puts this on his own or not but seeing how deft he is with his hands, it's not a stretch to assume that he puts it on his own.

And I find that really hot since look at those clean strokes..!! He's better at applying them than me. I have this desire to let him do my makeup but when I think about it I start making incomprehensible noises and bury my face into my pillow. Purple eyeliner just-? Looks so good on him?

It should be illegal at this rate he looks so tempting I hate it. Sometimes I just have this urge to ruin in, I don t care how I just want to smudge it for some reason. Like deadass, I just want you all to appreciate how good his eyes look!

HELP HIS EYESDHFHTKHEKFHDKFHDMFHKDHFKSGDK IM FUCKFINDG LSOING IT

WHY DO I LOVE HIS EYES SO MUCH I DONT FUCKING KNOW I'VE NEVER BEEN A FAN OF CHARACTERS WITH MISMATCHED EYES BUT WITH HIM IM JUSTHGJJFJG KG NVM

His eyes are fucking beautiful, man. 🤡💞 Could stare at them for hours and never get tired!!!!

Need I say more?

BRO IM FUVKGIGNVJKGVKNGKFHFKFFJF HIS TEETH IM CRYIGGN WHAT THE ACTUALLY FUCK I KNEW THEY WERE SHARP BUTJGKVJGKGJFKGJCKFJKCFJKFFHKCJFKGJDOFHKDHFKDHDKDHDJ BARKBARKBARKBARK

I mean what 🗿

guys displex is insane because they literally made jade have two ssrs in a row with banners that were available at the same time do you know how painful that was for me

when jamil bday card dropped all i lost ebg because i panicked over the thought of a jade bday card and started saving!!! and i did!!!! i managed to save up 100 pulls and i was so fucking chill after that but then,

abema stream happened

i was asleep when that happened so when i woke up i had like 283628 pings in discord telling me that he has an ssr for the halloween event and i was just 🗿 yo say sike his bday is soon displex must be joking

haha nope! they were dead serious.

that shit was painful i started crying 🤡 what the fuck because i didn't have enough gems for both ssrs and his halloween card was just absolutely beautiful.

so i went insane and saved 200 copies of the same jade card in attempt to make him come home before pity so i dont have to whale

I mean,

Black nails.

The bandages.

The harness.

The hat is kinda ugly but that's ok.

THE BELTS AT HIS WAISTFJTKDJRKFBFKFHOFHDKDHDKSGDKSHSKXHSKJS

SO I WAS REALLY DESPERATE AHHSHDHFJFGHJFJF THANKFULLY THEY BOTH CAME HOME BEFORE PITY SO TYSM JADE I LOVE U FOR THAT AHAHJAHDJ

oh shit this got long so imma just end this here 🐬 if you read this far, congrats HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

[llazyneiph]

its been a busy fuckin week for this mod my ladz!!! i thought i would just give an end of week run down how everything is going, everything added so far and my to do list! also discord!!! and patreon!!! but i’ll talk abt that after this!! a general run down if u dnt know what this wip mod is:

The Royalty Mod gives your sims the opportunity to being the reigning Monarch of your game. They have the chance to become a Beloved Ruler or a Despised Tyrant (and will be treated as such!) They will be completely in control of a custom tax system, will the be benevolent and keep the taxes low or be greedy and fill their coffers with their subject’s simoleans? Be careful though, your actions will affect your citizens and their views of you! Your Monarch will be the most important piece of the puzzle, as they will be able to give titles to family and friends... or even a random street vendor. Having your Monarch bestow titles such as Crown Royals, Royal Partners, Servants, Court Wizards and more, keeps you out of CAS and IN your game! No more stopping and starting your gameplay!

A general overview of everything included so far:

Monarch: - A custom Heir system: Your Monarch can choose anyone bestowed with the title of Crown Royal or Royal Partner to become the next in line to the throne! And if they decide they made a mistake, the Heir can be disowned :((( sad lyfe As soon as the Monarch passes away, the Heir will automatically claim the throne! - If your Monarch dies before they get a chance to name an heir, then any Crown Royal or Royal Partner can vie for the throne. Whoever the people choose (gets to reputation level 6 - very good) first, will become the next Monarch! - Teens and up can become the Monarch, (lookin at u edward the 6th) - Custom tax system! Raise taxes to get more money instantly and in your weekly tax collection, but incur the ire of your subjects! Lower taxes and you will lose money and earn less each week but your subjects will love you! - Your Monarch will draw a crowd wherever they go! Even with no fame points they’ll attract a mass of adoring onlookers. (But no paparazzi for my historical players) - Make world-wide decrees - Listen to your subjects pressing concerns by telling your Trusted Advisor that you will hold a hearing, get that gud gud karma!! - Make anyone a Crown Royal! - Make the land celebrate your own birthday with a new Monarch’s Birthday tradition, with custom goals to be met! - Don’t walk like the rest of these peasants, make sure to enable your royal stride to royally stand out from the crowd. Not enough? Enable your regal glow to really drive home that you’re better than everyone else! - Royal greetings! - Allow your subjects to commence Sunday trading on a lot with the Market lot trait! Townies will come and man the stalls every sunday 9-3 and the royal family can peruse and purchase to their hearts content! -probably more that im forgetting!!!

Heirs, Crown Royals & Royal Partners: - Titles are bestowed by the monarch, crown royals & heirs can be titled at birth and Royal Partners can be titled after marriage! - Both can be named as Heir, and both can vie for the throne if the Monarch dies unexpectedly! - Your Monarch can make anyone a Crown Royal, so if you gameplayed that your Monarch adopted a poor orphan kid, then they can have a shot at the throne too! - All have multiple different social and skill modifiers, so they can make new friends fast and be better at everything than them! - Also all have their own socials - ALSO all can be completely banished from the royal family - u can defo marry into the royal family if u wanted, and make ur peasant family the next gen of royals ;))) - loads more but im so tired

Trusted Advisor: - Your Monarch will choose their trusted advisor! they advice! u on stuff! so choose wisely! - everything about taxes, beginning situations, domestic affair (and planning to add LOADS more) goes thru ur advisor, just like it does in real life and by real life i mean i think i just made that up - way more 2 come bros

- brand spankin new custom animations!!!!!!!!!!

Planned to Add (p much the same as last post): - unlockable interactions based on skills such as charisma - bad monarch reputation and tyrant trait to have the possibility of triggering a revolt??? - Custom situations to trigger weekly events such as royal hearings, banquets ect. - custom situations to trigger a bunch of npc servants (big maybe) - Mass Excitement over royal babies - Mass Mourning over passed over Monarchs - Mass Excitement over new Monarch - Options for crown royals to steal the throne - Sentence to death - Way more custom socials - looking into craftables - Perhaps more of a focus on the working class - more magicky type interactions for court wizards - just like. so much more. but its 1:30am and my brain has stopped working

ok now i wrote this out it rlly doesn’t look like a lot but i have so many gatdamn plans for shit i still gotta add. plus i will probably end up making hair and a few clothes and objects too. also omg guys im totally gonna make one of those fancy fuckin trailers for youtube :))))))))))) also was i on fiverr lookin at voice actors to narrate it...? maybe bitch

anyway i said i would talk abt patreon so here it is!!!

first things first, let me just say that no, i absolutely do not think i am entitled to a single cent of anyone’s money!!! I would/will still put 110% into this mod and my future mods because I absolutely love doing this. At the moment I’m currently working on this mod about 8-10 hours a day, 5 days a week (animations bruh), which is kinda insane. but I want this to be everything everyone’s wanted from EA for years.

I made a Patreon for those who would like to support me. If you do decide to become a Patron I am endlessly thankful for that, not just the monetary value of it but the fact that you believe in me enough to do that.

Every cent of any pledge goes towards my saving fund for my course next year, which for those of who don’t know, I’m currently a first year Game Design student!!! In complete clarity, I’m looking at a $15,000 loan atm, so literally anything helps if u do decide to pledge!

Tiers start at $1 and all tiers have access to a private patrons channel in my discord! u can go read what u get with the tiers over on my page! I’ve offered as much as I can, but since im super not down with exclusives, pls let me know if u think there’s anythin more i can offer u guys!!!

Tier 2 does include a one week early access to my content. I feel like this is the most I’m comfortable offering, and I will always stick to or under EA’s rules when it comes to Patreon.

Tier 2 also offers first picks for Beta Testing, but depending on how many (if any) tier 2 patrons I get, it may work on a rotational system as I still want to include people from tumblr in the beta testing. I don’t want anyone who can’t afford patreon to feel left out, so I would still offer some beta testing spots here and it’ll be first come first served like normal! i don’t want it to feel like i’m gatekeeping my cc. i hope this is okay with you guys! For those who aren’t in a place where they can become a patron, but still want to stay included in everything related to this mod, I now have a Discord Server that anyone can join! speaking of >>>>

we have a discord ladzzzz!!!!!!!!!

If u wanna stay up to date on everything I’m doing regarding the mod, or u have a question or suggestion, or there's something wrong with one of my mods that u need fixed, or tbh if u just wanna hang out with some cool dudeeees n chill n chat n have a jolly time then com join the discord!!!!!!!!

i’m going to be posting updates and screenshots of the mod process much more frequently there (probs like a few times a day tbh lmao) and it’s much easier to get a hold of me there if u have any suggestions.

and tbh we just gonna have a chill time and i want a metric fuckton of memes and gifs. if that doesn’t sway u, we have a whole channel dedicated to only pics of guy fieri. u will be banned if u post anything else there. u were warned.

ok god im so sorry this is literally 10 years long but i just had a lOT to say but like, mods goin good lads. i just want to make something that gives the game more play ability and keeps u in game and out of CAS. its excitin stuff. thanks for listenin.

                              PATREON | DISCORD SEVER

                    see all royalty mod updates on my tumblr here

also im v sorry if u join the discord like right after this is posted bc i am most definately fuckin asleeeeeeep

[dontyouhearmehowling]

oh my god. Ok so I just scrolled through your blog and my heart hurts because there is so much love and just so much stuff I can relate too and I just ahhh damnnn it I cant even but like can I please have the story of your relationship with this girl your with? please? i'm a hopeless romantic I feel too much I love so hard my own love life is complicated but i know the kind of love you talk about thats exactly how i love the love of my life too so yours is a story I need to hear

ok so. it all started on April 31st, 2018. i reblogged one of those ask games and she sent me an emoji that said “i’m too scared to talk to you but i think you’re great” and i was like do it!!! and she did!!!! she texted me after i had already gone to sleep tho, so i only answered the next day. but then we talked all day. and the next. and the next. and we never ran out of things to talk about and even only knowing her for a few days i already felt comfortable enough with her to talk about anything?? it was wild. since day 1 we’ve had this connection that i’ve never had with anyone else and its my favorite thing in the world. after like a week we already had a bunch of inside jokes, something that i’d never had before, and i was already crushing on her. ok so we became very close friends like immediately, and i mostly ignored my crush on her bc i thought she didn’t like me back and usually i’d get meaningless crushes on everyone at first before i met her. but then this other girl and i started flirting and i realized i didnt like her bc i liked c too much, so i broke things off and kinda went like “oh shit this is real” and decided that i’d just stay friends with c until i eventually couldnt take it anymore and had to tell her abt my feelings bc thats how i am. anyways ok cool meanwhile i made her watch the good place on rabb.it with me which will be relevant later.

ok so fast forward to may 21st or something around that time. its time to sleep bc i have school the next day so we say goodnight, but then i guess she says something or reblogs something and i get sad bc i realize she doesnt like me back. so i make some hashtag sad posts abt yearning and then i realize i told her i was going to sleep and i didnt want her to think i didnt want to talk to her so i text her again and say like “ok i was going to go to sleep but then i got sad abt my crush” and SHE GOES “you have a crush????????” and im there like. what in the hell bc not only did i not try to hide it At All, i constantly posted about it and had an entire tag about her and i thought it was pretty obvious. so anyways i go “yes?? i thoought you knew that?? im literally always posting about it??” and she asks me to talk abt the crush and who it is. i say “just stalk the tag if u want, im going to sleep” then shes like “nO WAIT WHO IS IT” and im like. blatantly ignoring that and my heart is already beating out of my chest but she Really wants to know and then at one point i say “please dont make me answer that” so shE SAYS “you’re making me think that its me” and i say “i dont know what you want me to say” and SHE GOES “I WANT YOU TO SAY THAT ITS ME BC I HAVE A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU” so i just. die. right then and there. also yknow we talk about it and its like after 1 am and im just happier than i’ve ever been. ok so 2 days later she asks me out Officially and its great and shes the cutest gf ever and she made me feel more wanted than i’d ever felt in my entire life. then 6 days later she sends me a big big big text on tumblr and long story short (bc it was kinda personal), she would be deleting her all social media for the summer.

so she was gone. and we had only dated for a week at this point, but we’d known each other for 2 months, and i already loved her. i already knew she was the love of my life. i didnt even try to move on, i’d tell people i didnt wanna move on cuz i knew i was meant to love her. i had another blog like this that i used to talk about how much i loved and missed her (so like. exactly like this). i literally reasoned with myself that like. that happened because before i met her i was in a really bad place after a terrible relationship and i was almost giving up on finding someone who actually made me feel loved bc i thought it would never happened, so i was like “ok so i was in a really bad place, so the universe brought my soulmate a little early just for a while so that i would know i had to hold on, and when its actually time for us to be together, it will bring us to each other once again” like i actually told myself that, in those words. and yknow what? i wasnt even wrong. on july 15th she texted me from an empty tumblr with her old url and at first i literally couldnt believe it but we talked for hours and hours and i asked her what happened bc i thought she was disconnecting for the summer and she said “i was. i am. i just couldnt not talk to you anymore” and she said that she thought about me every single day, and i told her i missed her and she said she didnt text sooner bc she thought i’d be angry at her and ofc i wouldnt, i could never be angry at her and besides, she was just taking care of herself and i said i dont think i could be anything less than head over heels for for, and she said she felt the same way, but wasnt ready to be more than friends yet. but that had always been more than enough for me. just having her in my life would always be more than enough for me. so we stayed friends.

then, on august 9th i got this ask.

and she saw it after i said i was gonna go to bed (bc again, i had school the next day) and she texted me a whole thing about how that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said about her and that i should be asleep but she had to get it out of her chest and that her anxiety made it hard for her to show how much i meant to her so she was sorry if i didnt know and this would probably make no sense but she was tired of keeping it to herself bc shes the luckiest person alive for having met me and that it was gonna be so hard because shes so difficult (shes not) and her anxiety is difficult but that she literally spent every night thinking about me and of buying plane tickets to come see me so that she could be with me. then she was like “im sorry if this is uncomfortable to you and you can just ignore it but i think im in love with you and this is over text and not romantic at all (it was the most romantic night of my life) but you’re asleep (i wasnt) and we arent together but i want to be one day” and until this i was Trying to fall asleep and then i checked my phone that kept RINGING and died a thousand times over and started to answer and she sent other texts saying “i’ve never felt this way about anyone before i’m so in love with you its fucking ridiculous and this is gonna be so complicated but fuck i want this so bad / i’m sorry it took me so long / would you move to new york with me?” and i was This Close to literally fucking exploding like. how the hell was this happening how was it not a DREAM. so we talked and i obviously said i loved her too and eventually she asked me out and thats still probably the best night of my life. other highlights: “i’ve loved you way before august 9th so jot that down” and “off topic but i love you / you’re honestly my other half” and, after i said “you cant make me laugh its 2am”, she answered “i’m going to make you laugh for the rest of your life so help me god” and thats my favorite thing anyone has ever said to me probably and so far she’s kept her word.

anyways we got back together and then she told me that she never even told her friends she broke up with me??? bc that way she could keep pretending we were still together???? literally like sjdksndk imagine being this loved. i dont have to. anyways she wrote poems abt me sometimes and her christmas gift for me was gonna be a book with all her poems and she called it “what we owe to each other” because of the good place (remember how i said it’d be relevant later? its later) bc like she said that when we were watching tgp together on rabb.it thats when she realized that she Really Truly liked me like For Real. and the inscription on the book was going to be “to the girl i love / and what i owe her” and. yall. i cry. anyways one of the poems had a huge impact on us. heres the story:

and she got them but we broke up before she got to mail them to me. what happened was she had some mental health problems and she said she couldnt give me what i needed at the time but knew i’d still give her my all bc thats just how i am and she thought it wouldnt be fair so she broke things off to work on her mental health. she said she would need some time before we could be friends. the last thing we said was that we loved each other. this was in like november 2018, and we didnt talk for months. i actually tried to move on this time after a while, but it didnt take. and then i gave up for good. havent tried since. but anyways, then, on march 11th, 2019, i had my first day of college back in my home country, and we have this “pranks”/games that seniors get to do to the freshmen, and one of them required eggs, and they asked us to paint them, so i panted mine as iron man bc it was easy, but c LOVES iron man. like. LOVES. like in a Whole New Level of loving. once when we were dating she said she loved me more than tony stark and i was like. shook. like she tattooed “T.S” on her ankle after him. u get the point. she loves him very much, its adorable and endearing and i love it. anyways. so i sent her a picture of it saying like “you dont have to answer this but i made this for my university and i thought you would like it” and she answered and IMMEDIATELY something clicked and we talked and talked and talked and it was never weird or awkward or uncomfortable. it never is with her. its incredible, i cant explain it. i Know shes my soulmate like thats the ONLY possible explanation for this kind of connection. its unreal. anyways. we became friends again! all was well.

then one beautiful night she drunk texts me sndjkajs she sends me so many texts and says it sucks that we live so far away and that she saw my posts (in this particular case, one that said something about like. when she talked about love now, was it about someone else?) and she said that it wasnt. and then she went to sleep and i only saw the texts when i woke up and i was DYING bc we had a 4 hour difference and it’d take a while for her to wake up. when she did, we talked and she said she wasnt over me and was scared she might never be, and even though we were still gonna stay friends, it was nice to know that she still loved me. ok so fast forward a bit more and i was starting to wonder if she’d moved on again, when she finds out her best friend had a crush on her, and that conversation ends up with her saying “it was 100% platonic for me / sorry if thats weird i just wanted you to know that” and it was NOT weird it was GREAT NEWS bc i was Hella jealous of her best friend and at first i wondered if they were dating and anyways the fact that she wanted me to know that was a pretty good hint that she still had feelings for me. ngl im still somewhat jealous of h (c’s best friend), but thats just bc im an insecure lil bitch and also bc they get to go out and do stuff together that i cant do with c bc of the distance, yknow? but anyways. then she went on a graduation trip in mid to the end of june and she bought me a magnet. just. out of nowhere. i cannot stress enough how Incredibly unexpected this was. so much so that i actually convinced myself that it meant she was over me????? literally. what the fuck. anyways we named him together and coincidentally (or bc of soulmate powers. who knows) we both had the same favorite names. i still love that.

okay so then we go to july 29th, 2019. first of all theres one of my favorite interactions Ever which was like after i was venting about something and i was thanking her and i said “you’re always here for me” to which she answered “nowhere else i’d rather be” and i still think thats peak romance and i will take no criticism on this. anyways so then she sent me a poem that she wrote based on a song i’d sent her (the song i called “heaven is a place” and its the BIGGEST mood for being in love and i sent it to her bc it was how i felt about her so her writing a poem about it?? literally the best thing ever. love it) anyways it was a beautiful poem and i cried and got very emotional and kinda went too far in my compliments (aka being very obvious about my romantic feelings) and then i was like oh no sorry if i made u uncomfortable and she was like. “you have NEVER. EVER EVER EVER EVER made me uncomfortable” “you’re the only person on planet earth i am comfortably myself around” and “there’s nothing you could ever say that i wouldn’t wanna hear” and anyways it was just very good and romantic conversation even tho we were just cough cough platonic hashtag gal pals hashtag no homo ✌️ and then she was like ok wait. i need to talk to u abt something. and in short she said she was waiting for us and i was like well what are you waiting for exactly? and she was like idk?? for us to accidentally bump into each other in new york in a few years?? WHICH WAS LITERALLY WHAT I’D DAYDREAM ABOUT BACK IN JUNE 2018 BEFORE SHE CAME BACK OKAY so anyways we had a Great conversation and said i love you about a thousand times each and she decided she was gonna buy tickets to come see me. and then she dID like TWO DAYS LATER. lichrally. queen of impulsivity but in the best way possible.

—————

ok quick edit here cuz i forgot to say that when i found out she was coming i asked for my mom’s help to make a necklace pendant for her from scratch. my mom works with prosthetics so she has the material to make jewelry and back when c and i were dating in 2018 i had made this lil design for a necklace that had the moon and the ocean (bc duh) and i was gonna give it to her for valentines day in 2019 but we broke up before that so i didnt get the chance, but when i found out i was meeting her i knew i had to. so i made the necklace in wax, like this:

and my mom took it to her work and heated it up to melt it and keep the shape of it to fill with silver, and this was the result:

i gave it to her when she got here and she wore it while she was here and it made me so happy. ok edit over

—————

ok so we kept being like couple-y but not officially in a relationship bc we didnt want to make her anxiety worse. also at one point she was like “so about the ‘i love you more than the moon/ocean’ thing, since we BOTH love BOTH of the moon AND the ocean, i think its only Fair if we update our love declarations to ‘i love you more than the mocean’ bc its mix of both but thats not a word, buT its pronounced exactly like ‘motion’. therefore we should both start saying ‘i love you more than the motion’”. so now we have both the wonderful, romantic, original version, and the NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL DO U HEAR ME C??? version :) and after this day she always started with the WORST!!!!!! version, and i always started with the Only Valid Version, but we’d still answer each other’s ofc because. well. thats love i gues?? it sorta goes like this though: her: i love you more than the motion / me: i hate u / me: i literally hate u so much / me: i Also love you more than the motion

but anyways she was coming to visit me but the plane ticket wasnt for my home country it was for where i was going to university at (a new university, i was starting over) and when i first got here on this campus, i didnt have a working phone number for this country, and i wouldnt be able to access the wifi for 3 days, so i had no way of talking to her. it was TERRIBLE and i missed her more than anything in my LIFE but when i got wifi (after CRYING to the people here bc theyre the most unorganized uni ever and i was already very overwhelmed and stressed) i immediately called her and she’d sent me over 100 text messages dkfjssjks it was amazing, there were two (2) videos of her singing (which is like. objectively the best thing in the world, and the song was rlly romantic and i love it sm when she showed it to me for the first time she said it made her think abt me), a poem, AND a HUGE text with “i love you” written like. a THOUSAND TIMES. seriously i have a gif of it opening and scrolling bc it was so long that the text wouldnt show up directly on the chat screen and u have to click on it to see the rest. i’d never felt more loved in my entire life by anyone ever. anyways so then it came the day for her to get here and i had to wake up at 5 am to go get her at the airport and the uber was like $40 but who CARES it was the best day of my LIFE and i got there 20 minutes earlier bUT GUESS WHAT SO DID SHE (hashtag just soulmate things) then we facetimed the entire time while she was walking through the airport and getting her luggage and then she hung up to walk to the door where i was and we hugged for like 5 minutes and we were totally in people’s way and also almost fell but it was the best thing in the world and i never should’ve let her go. but, we had to go home, so i did. and we spent 4 days together and im not gonna go into details bc this is already too long but u can always send me another ask about her visit if ur not a coward. also i bought her a hoodie from my uni and whenever she wears it i just. die. in short, those days were the happiest i’ve ever been. this campus res had never felt like home before that friday and it hasnt again since that monday, but i swear to god, during those 4 days, this was the only place i could possibly belong.

anyways then she left and i cried for the entire uber ride home and then i cried all day. lmao. also when she was here she gave me the poetry book, the magnet, and the bracelet. still wear the bracelet every single day and i love it more than anything. but then personal stuff happened and we kinda stopped being couple-y again and we’re just friends now but before new years i asked her if she still loved me and she said yes and she said she’d tell me if it changed so ✌️✌️ im assuming it hasnt. even tho my brain is a bitch and everyday its like. today. today is the day. this is when its gonna happen. buT yknow we’ve spent months before without even talking to each other and we got through that still in love, so i mostly ignore it. and tbh i know that actually like, even if we grow apart now (god forbid, but still) we’ll find our way back to each other eventually. like, i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: nothing, not even the universe itself, can convince me that shes not my soulmate. and even if it turns out i’m not hers, loving her is still the greatest honor i can think of.

another edit: also i started drawing recently and the first person i’ve ever finished drawing was her and also (surprise surprise @c since you’re already seeing all my feelings anyway) bc of my second drawing i almost missed the deadline for one of my midterms (which was a take-home test) bc instead of writing it i spent the entire day before the deadline finishing the drawing which was a secret valentines day gift (secret as in she didnt know it was supposed to be a gift, she thought it was just a drawing inspired by a quote that she loves) and i finished at 2 am but shes 3 hours behind so for her it was still 11 pm which MEANS it was still valentines day so it still counts, i win, lesbian rights!

[miafic]

this is literally me just writing in the tumblr text box. no planning. no real editing. i just wrote this in a few minutes. it’s cheesy af but im posting it because we need it almost as much as he does.

set between the end of mia and the start of 2. no concrete spoilers.

(in which mrs. wood is all of us~)

awsten and mom are home. otto and his dad are out. it’s night. it’s warm outside. the cicadas are doing their thing. 

and awsten - he’s lying in the bottom bunk, knowing he should have been asleep hours ago. but he's not. he’s under the covers, staring at the wall, the thoughts running through his head over and over and over and over, and something about that night is different - something about awsten is different - and for some reason that means he just can’t stomach it like he usually can. he can’t bury the memories, can’t shove them away, can’t distract himself or distance them or make them feel small. he is thinking about EVERYTHING. everything he’s been so desperately avoiding all this time.

and he breaks.

it’s not loud; not at first. it’s a little out of control, and the sobs come fast, one right after the other, which scares him a little bit, because he still feels numb. but the tears are coming, and his lungs are trembling behind his rib cage, and he gives in after a minute, letting his body do its thing. he doesn’t hold back. 

he knows he sounds like a pathetic little kid, but keeping it in is physically painful at this point. trying to restrain himself is making him sick to his stomach. yeah, the volume and desperation tearing from his throat are embarrassing. but this is necessary; his body refuses to avoid this any longer. he couldn’t stop this if his life depended on it.

he thinks he hears something from the other side of the house, but he can’t really tell because his own voice is so loud in his ears, and he hasn’t cried in so long, not since... and not really since he... 

he hears footsteps hurrying down the hall toward him, and the door flies open, and in rushes mom, who’s the only person in the entire world that awsten wouldn’t kick out of this room right now. 

“awsten?” she asks, afraid and sad and brave all at the same time. 

she reaches to turn on the light, but he whimpers out, “n-no!” and she stops. 

“okay. okay, honey.” and she goes over to him, sinking down to a crouch beside him, right up by his pillow, and she presses her warm hand against his wet cheek, and he squeezes his eyes shut. two more tears slide out as she leans forward to put her lips to his forehead. 

“i don’t know what’s happening,” he chokes out. it’s messy and crackly, but she seems to comprehend it just fine, so he continues babbling. “i’m not sad. i didn’t even have a bad dream. this just... started, and i don’t know why. i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i don’t know what’s making me do this. it’s just happening, mom. i don’t know how to make it stop.” 

“that’s okay, my baby,” she whispers, and she sounds so sure that, god help him, he believes her. 

his right hand emerges from under the blankets, reaching for her, and she understands him again, this time shifting onto her knees so she can steadily wrap her arms around him. he’s been crying the whole time, but as soon as she hugs him, it’s as if he breaks all over again. 

sobs shake their way out of him, rough and unforgiving, and he closes his eyes, wiggling closer to her, trying to fight off his thoughts that are unkindly reminding him, you’re eighteen years old now. 

“i’m here,” she promises softly, kissing his temple as a particularly heartbreaking sob emerges. “mama’s here.”

“m-mom,” he sobs, half thankful, half a plea for her to stop being so nice. she’s just making him cry harder.

“you’re not alone, sweetie,” she assures. even though she’s still holding him tightly with both arms, her fingers start carding through his faded hair. “there is nothing wrong with you. i love you, and i’m here, baby. i’m here.” 

“no...”

“what, honey?” 

he shakes his head tearfully. 

“what?” she asks again, pulling back to look at him. he bites his lip to stifle a fresh sob, and she frowns. “awsten, you can cry. you don’t ever have to hide in front of me.” 

“no, i-”

“no buts,” she insists, and she kisses him again, right where his bangs land on his forehead.

his eyes close. it’s all too much. all too much. how is he ever supposed to...

“shh, sweetheart... you can cry.”

he does.

a new round starts, the tears coming out angrily this time, and he moves closer and clings to her, his fingers pressing into her shoulders. she smells good, smells like the faintest hint of her perfume, and it comforts him more than he’d ever admit. 

“i h-hate this,” he sobs. 

“i know, honey.” 

“i hate everything! i hate michael. i hate my parents.”

she’s quiet, listening. 

“i hate side effects, and growing up, and therapy, and money, and...” he shakes his head. that’s something he can’t say to her. she’d understand, but he can’t do that to her. 

“i hate all of that, too,” she admits softly, her voice a quiet murmur against his ear, “but i love you.” 

for some reason, that gets him to quiet. he doesn’t let go of her or even loosen his grip. but his head suddenly gets a little clearer. 

his body is still crying without his mind’s permission, but it’s tamer, like the rain still pattering lightly on the sidewalk after the thunderstorm is over. it drops into tiny hiccuping cries that subside as she starts murmuring to him about how strong he is and how she loves him so much and how she’s so proud of him. 

he knows it’s all bullshit - except the fact that she loves him. he really does believe that now. (how could he not after everything that happened this summer?) but he lets it all sink in anyway. her voice is so soothing after his jagged, frustrated sounds. 

“you okay now?” she asks. 

“mom,” he whispers back softly, voice destroyed.

“it’s okay, baby. it’s okay.”

his eyes flutter shut.

“good... there you go.” she starts stroking his hair again, starting lower down so that she’s running her hand over his forehead, too. it feels so nice.

he adjusts a little, getting comfortable on his pillow. he feels her pull his blankets up to his shoulders the way he likes them. he slowly drags his eyelids back up.

“shh,” she murmurs immediately. “close your eyes.”

and he’s so fucking tired that he doesn’t protest, not even once.

she hums, “i’m here, baby. i’m not going anywhere.”

and suddenly, sleep feels so close and so possible. where had this been fifteen minutes ago? his breathing begins to slow, and everything feels better, but then her hand disappears. his eyes open instantly.

“okay,” she says quickly, placing her fingers back on his skin. 

he can see that she was wiping her own tears away, but he’s far too tired to process it.

“i won’t leave you,” she assures, so his eyes shut like she instructed. and when he feels her kiss his forehead again, he lets himself relax.

one last sob ripples weakly through his chest, but she easily soothes it away. 

“i know,” she tells him, ever so gentle. “mama’s here.”

and that’s the last thing he remembers before he falls into a deep sleep. 

[imadeletingmysocials]

My scores for E3, because apparently now i’m a dumb 4channer who thinks this /v/ meme shit matters, like it’s not gonna affect sales or anything it’s pointless as all hell [this is lenghy, but hear me out ok]

EA: 

4/10 - people will probably play the games regardless of how shitty this presentation was but... It felt pretty insulting. 

Battlefield V is probably gonna make a lot of money regardless cuz people like war games and it seems pretty well done, the more footage they have shown seemed better than their weird advertizement that made world war 2 seem very wacky, which honestly regardless if you’re a sexist neckbeard or not, seemed like a poor advertizement move. 

TinyBuild:

No one watched this lol and it was just 1 GAME and a fun cute musical that made people who aren’t strong enough to musicals die, 6/10 because it made nerds die and their song is catchy, i dont really care about their 1 game.

Microsoft:

 9/10 - I'm giving this much of a high score because I would play practically almost all of these games showcased (they’ll probably be available on PC which I’m biased for cuz I have a gaming PC), no kidding, I pretty much liked everything I saw and it was fairly straight to the point. Many gamers don’t appreciate the finer details of each game and think they’re generic but that’s just fanboys who haven’t played a single game outside of their favorites. 

Also my cousin uses those Xbox One netflix rip offs that gives you games so i’m happy for him. The presentation had a lot of diamonds in the rough games that will I will probably appreciate more over time (they might even become cult classics like Metro or Dying Light) than any of other games at other e3s. As for the stuff I won’t be playing: It’s mostly harmless so eh.

There was an abundance of trailers! It was like one after the other, pure goodness, it seems as if they left out all of the Sports games to EA to present and the only thing they showed that might not be anyone’s cup of tea was “Forza”, but honestly? I appreciate it, it seems like a good racing game even if I’m not one to buy racing games.... But the more you think about the number of good games presented, the less you’ll think about that, I mean they showed DEVIL MAY CRY 5!!! 

...The Funko Pop game made me scream though.

Bethesda: 

8.5/10  I cannot deny that these are games I will want to play regardless if they’re good or not. Sad to see nerds not enjoy the opportunity to meet ANDREW W.K. but I’m glad all of the divisions they own are making sequels to stuff I already like, so pretty much Bethesda played it safe.

Devolver Digital:

 8/10 It’s like that one b-movie film your college students made and you had a laugh with creating.

Square Enix: 

5/10 seriously, 30 minues of just trailers? Most of which we saw?? I guess it could be worse but who uses E3 screentime for mostly MMORPG deals! The new stuff was too vague to be excited about too.

Ubisoft: 

7/10 - I liked it when they made funny quirky things and their games are probably gonna be okay like usual, Ubisoft has dedicated fans that like their collectathon games they release every year, and it’s usually that one game you play when you’re bored and got nothing else, it’s okay. 

Gamers hate fun and dancing and all that stuff but I kind of find stuff like that exciting, while nerds who never went outside and who are sensitive as all hell to any representation of fun find it “cringey”. A panda dabbed, and that settles it, Ubisoft was the only E3 Brave enough to dab this year. 

PC Game Conference (it was fairly long):

I know none of you watch this one cuz y’all fake as hell but listen... Fuck you LOL, these are the type of games people actually play over 400 hours and really get people’s money. Like these are games built to last that might be on the best-selling Steam front page for MONTHS, like how Frostpunk was comfirmed last year during this conference, PC Gaming has been known for sleeper hits that nobody knows about (because the attention goes to cinematic experiences on consoles most of the time) but suddently everyone’s playing it. 

PC gaming has always been an alternative lifestyle and seeing as many people didn’t watch this one, that just proves the point that it still relatively alternative. Maybe it’s because everyone sounds dumb as fuck when saying “PC GAMER MASTER RACE” and acting like an elitist. 

The PC Gaming conference is always more of a talk show than a regular E3 which is why I respect it every year, fuck the hyperactive gamers that just wanna see flashy trailers, this one’s more SOPHISTICATED!! It feels a lot more human and less artificial. Either way, lot’s of what you might’ve expected: Simulators and Survival games you’ll probably spend 3 years playing until they make a better minecraft clone. 

Gamers like to act as if they’re tired of Battle Royale (already? It’s a new fad it still is here to stay for a little more) but the numbers and success of it doesn’t lie that it isn’t a fad that proves itself to be highly tempting to try out for developers. Go cry to valve that they didn’t release Half-Life 3 cuz you haven’t played any other FPS game without even researching that Valve pretty much fired all of it’s developers and you’re just being annoying.

I feel as if I need to comment what I saw at this e3 cuz nobody watched, they made a mod I liked from skyrim into a fully-ass game, they’re rebooting Star Control which not a single gamer today knows of, the HP Lovecraft open world detective game also seems very good. YAKUZA IS COMING TO PC!!!!!!!!! Killing Floor 2 stuff, Road Redemption stuff, SHARK RPG, cute indie games, Jeff Goldblum was there, Wall-E with a gun in VR which seems to have promissing good vr design by Insomiac games (yes the spyro people), 2 games about Taxi driving... Like sure I think it’s a good format for story telling but.

A cell-shaded art game, star citizen is still being made, and it’s gone to the point nobody really wants it anymore even if it’s... Still being made you know? So most guys are wrong that it was gonna be canceled. After that was the technical graphic card stuff which gamers don’t have enough capability to understand, stuff like 9k laptops that SELL a lot mind you. Rich people love that technical stuff. 

A space defense sim game, Don’t Starve Sequel, Just Cause 4 detailed explanation of the engine, Overkill’s The Walking Dead gameplay which has been in development hell for years now now has a release date, I discovered Clementine’s voice actor is white... Go figure, a literal pixelated roguelike (not what you think it is, it’s Noita), 

Theme Hospital REBOOT!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! And the doctors were cute. Probably one of the funniest games presented... Followed by REALM ROYALE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That harvest moon clone with a cute art style is still being made: Ooblets, no release date sadly. Anno is still going, cyanide and happiness still exists? and they’re making a battle royale? lol okay. How was Hitman 2 not announced during Square Enix?? Anyways it’s here at the end, the trailer was amazing and it’s coming out this year. 

I don’t have that much strong feelings because it’s just a normal conference and not a special one you know? But I’ll give it a 8/10 or 7/10 im not sure cuz I seem to like most games and I found Frankie cute.

Sony: 

Yo usually Sony makes like a huuuuuuuge thing about their conferences (like this year they didn’t even showcase indie games) but this year they started from a church for the sake of immersion?? It reminded me a little of their first E3s during the 90s, and it almost felt like a indie gathering for musicians, I swear to god, Sony is borderline experimental trying to balance out their E3 across stages. Jeb played the banjo and people just ACCEPTED it... AND THEN someone played some JAPANESE FLUTE? aRT. It might come off as a bit arrogant for some tho.

Nerds hated it and thought it was bizzare, which is why it means it’s good. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH BITCHES. Anyways could have been a little more fast-paced... But then again when it was fast-paced it was just like: Huh? What was that? I’m a big Resident Evil Fangirl, RE2 was my childhood but ignoring that for a sec: finally, Death Stranding gameplay, remins me of shadow of the colossus but post-apocalpytic, survival horrorish and abstract sci-fi.

 Kind of feels more Metal Gear than MGSV did already Cuz Norman Reedus sounds like snake a lot more than the 24 hours guy, and because from what I’ve seen in the footage, someone acts like Otacon to “Sam”. I think most now can figure out the plotpoints of this game with what has been established. I might be a bit sad at the fact that this will be a PS4 exclusive just like Metal Gear Solid 4, which I still haven’t played fully because it’s PS3 exclusive and I only have a gaming PC. 

Also this E3 was surprisingly entirely SINGLE PLAYER, I sorta don’t believe in the “single player doesn’t exist” myth honestly, especially now. I’m not sure if that makes Sony’s E3 better or worse, maybe it needed more variation, like I’ve commented, usually they have an indie showcase which this year did not. There were few games shown but for what it was worth, it’s still interesting... But yeah just 5 games? No Spyro? (easy picking), nothing extra? I can understand why many people felt this E3 was upsetting.

8/10.

Nintendo

Here it is, the most overhyped developer of all of E3, the source of “Nintendo wins E3 by doing nothing” memes because Nintendo fans really don’t care about anything except Nintendo and then act surprised when they only care about Nintendo when they try to be a little more open-minded (and fail) even if other E3s probably make more games built to last in comparisson, cuz we gay people only care about NINTENDO YOU KNOW? Shade asside... 

I was pleasantly surprised this E3, it wasn’t just a series of okay at best releases, a strong 9/10. 

tHAT WAS WHAT I WROTE IN PREPRATION....

BUT THEN???? IT WAS JUST THAT??? NO PRIME 4 NO ANYTHING LIKE JUST 3 GAMES BASICALLY? (maybe there was 5 games but eh) I mean smash is good.. It’s pretty much just an update of the last smash, every character is REALLY FUCKING GOOD BUT.... JUST THAT? jeez.. Like, the only stuff I wanted from it was Mario Party and Smash... Okay maybe that 1 Mecha game. Also I guess fornite is now on Switch but I can play that anywhere else really.

I guess a 7/10 is all I can give to just Smash, if there was a little more I’d give it a 9/10 for sure but... ehh Just Smash? jeez, fuck... i MEAN I kind of get it, Nintendo doesn’t do “e3″ normally, they usually do 1 big game at E3 and then wait a couple of months to do that little seasonal announcement thing they do across the year, ugh.. Okay. Yeah I guess i shouldn’t have expected much. Still isn’t it weird that Miyamoto was in Ubisoft’s E3 but not this one??? what!

Anyways

[sunlightbi]

hi guys !! i promise i’ll do a proper follow forever later in 2018 when we survive 2017 but today i want to give a shout out to some amazing people whom i’m very proud to call my friends and best friends. all of my mutuals are extremely special but these ones mean the whole world to me as we always talk and laugh together and i’m pretty sure i’d die for every single one of them. i hold each one of you very close to my heart :’) so here’s a list of people that make me smile every day and also make my world brighter and my dash a better place !! (1. idk how long it takes im sorry i lov y’all 2. also idk why i have this summer pic as my header but happy new year i guess)

i’ll start with the most important person for on this website @alloutshirt. lisa, you’re truly my soulmate and i can’t even imagine my life without you now. you always make my happy by just liking random posts on my blog or tagging me in pure stuff. i just want you to know that i’d do anything for you, i care about you so so much and i don’t think i’ll ever stop. i hope you’ll always be happy because you’re too precious and incredible and you have my whole heart. i love you to the moon and back, baby :’) YOU’RE ALSO THE PRETTIEST GIRL IN THE WORLD DON’T FORGET THAT

@twofronteeth amal even tho you never check ur activity page and have a face like a goddess (no kidding im crying every time i see your selfies) somehow we are mutuals and friends, i still don’t know why the fuck you noticed me but that was the best day of my life. please please never change, you’re literally the cutest person i know and your spelling mistakes make you even cuter !! just the way you talk to ppl makes you cute idk how you do that. you truly deserved your nickname ‘baby honey’ and i’m very proud to call you that i love you

of course i can’t even imagine myself without Pure Squad even tho it exists like 3 minutes but !!!! these people are already so important to me that i cry every time we interact

@spaceboysweater arsh i swear i couldn’t love you more because you’re one of the purest people on this website. and ur laugh !!!!! oh my god this is the best thing i’ve ever heard i need it as my ringtone. i will love you forever, you always make me smile and i wanna hug you so tight !!!!!!!!!

@babieharrie ahhh karri you’re just the most adorable person ever and i love you so so so so much. we almost made it !!! almost started a gc aksjfgffkj. you are incredibly lovely and you have a special place in my heart even tho you hate cats which i still can’t believe oh my god

@rainbowsboa 1) where the fuck are you i miss you 2) i’ve never seen a blog with more posts than yours i swear i need hours to scroll through it. but bella you’re my sunshine and you always bring me happiness, i really enjoy talking to you and omg i just love you so much i’m sorry i’m crying

@bibi-harry becca i can’t even put into words how much you mean to me !!!!!! i appreciate it so much when you come to talk to me because you’re sad or feel alone. i’m really glad i can help because you’re too amazing and flawless to be sad ever. i just hope you’ll have the best 2018, i love you with my whole heart cupcake !!

@haryslytherin eleanor baby it feels like i’ve known you for ages, you’re such an incredible person even tho your blog is a mess aklsjkdh. i love talking to you, you’re a pure bean. please make more 1d edits in 2018 that’s a need for me !! your art is wonderful just as you :) also i hope in 2018 you won’t change your icon every day

@fireprooof le !!!! just as you said i can’t imagine my tumblr experience without you too (tbh that message made me cry i love you so much). you were one of my first larry mutuals actually and i’ll never forget how excited i was that day. and i was extremely happy when you messaged me and said you miss my likes !! that was iconique. your edits give me life, i’ve never seen anything more beautiful, i just want to make a whole sideblog to reblog everything you make.  hope you’ll have an amazing 2018, i love you endlessly :’)

@louieh ghadeer aka the most iconic fanfic writer i know ;);)));)) i know this had been a tough year for you but i hope 2018 will be much better !!! you deserve the best only, i love you so so much and appreciate you more than you could imagine. i wanna give you the world and the stars and the moon and everything pure in the universe !!!!! i just hope everything will be okay darling :)

@stylesappreciation flo even tho you forgot about me i’m still here like hachi bc i love you very much a lot. anyways !!! skldjdfbhdskl you’re one of the most iconic people i know and your edits make my heart melt, i cry every time you post something new. we don’t talk as much as we used to which is sad but that’s okay, i’d sill give you my liver and everything you want. hope 2018 will treat you well baby :) ( @nosuchblue take care of her !!! i love u too erin and wish you all the best in 2018)

@liamsgrammys and @blushlouie you just go together and i can’t tell you apart. we actually don’t talk but you two are the most iconic gays ever and i’m so glad to witness ur gay relationship and reblog ur gay selfies and cry my gay tears !!!! i hope 2018 will be amazing for you, i love you two so so much, this gay experience is very important for me

@rosesau syeda aka ome of the most popular binches ever. i’m shook that like everybody knows you??? wtf??? how you do that honestly. you’re truly iconique and i’m pretty sure you make everyone’s tumblr experience much better. your text posts are my favourite thing ever and i just love you so incredibly much !!!! have the best 2018 biatch

@honeyhaz jackie !!!! the most precious flower in the land, i adore you so much. i really really really love talking to you, you’re the loveliest person ever, i hope you’ll have a lot of friends in 2018 !! you deserve only pure things darling. you make my heart burst with love every time you appear on my dash and i would just like to clarify that i love you to the moon and back :’)

@iconichalo well your url just speaks for itself so !!! i only wanted to say that alex you’re really an amazing person and i’m hella glad that we met thanks to gorgeous people we both talk to. i hope in 2018 we’ll become closer because i really like you !!! wish you the best stuff in new year darling :)

@ann-fortunately maybe i’d love you more if you stopped exposing me !!!!! alsjddgdgdkdj nevermind i actually love you very much a lot, you’re a pure puppy and i just wish 2018 treats you really well. all the love my dear !!! (also pls make more edits)

@dreamsmp3 eden baby idk when you’ll see this but i just want you to know that it’s not the same without you here, you’re incredible and i hope you’re taking care of yourself !!!!! i’m still thinking about that post i made when i just saw you on my dash and i oliterally became so overwhelmed that wrote big ass paragraph about how much i love you on the verge of tears and tbh this is Mood. you make everything better and brighter and i just want to wish you the best things in 2018, you deserve the whole world my love :’)

@lwtrainbows gio !!!! i’m so happy that i’m friends with arsh’s soulmate aldjfhfgjn you are just wonderful !!! i hope you won’t ever be sad, you need to always smile and laugh because the world needs more of this. you are one of the purest people ever and i just want to wrap you in a big blanket and give you forehead kisses. i wish 2018 treats you well sunshine !!!!

@alwaysycu well rhian you’re just an angel (my-my-my-my only angeeeel) that deserves better, always better. you make my heart go ‘!!!!’ when we talk and you’re just so nice and sweet always. i hope you’ll never be sad in 2018, it just goes against nature tbh. you were created to spread love and light so i hope next year will be the happiest for you :) i love you very much a lot

@iamlouis oh damn sarah !!! (this is just The Mood always with you) you’re a popular bitch and i’m still wondering why we are mutuals because your cool ass is too cool for me. everything you do is iconic and i’m tired bc you’re too good and pure wtf !! but i wish you become iconicer in 2018 because why not we all deserve some glow up i lov u

@delicatelou pinja you’re the softest person i know !!!! like literally. everything about you and your blog is so aesthetic and beautiful and just perfect??? h o w. i’m friends with a literal angel what the heck !! hope 2018 treats you well, you deserve the best only my pure baby. i’ll love you til the end of time darling, you’re amazing :’)

@ftdtlouis @lesbianhoran @larriez @definegirlfriends i’m only mentioning you because you broke my heart to pieces !!! but it’s new year so i gotts forgive you so you could dissappoint me in 2018 with something new. ALSMJDHNDG JOKES I LOVE Y’ALL EVEN THO I WAS HELLA SCARED YESTERDAY i just want all my mutuals to be happy and fine. is that too much to ask?.. anyways i wish you all the best i hope the nest time this shit happens i won’t be online bye

@rainbowstyles sabine i wouldn’t ever forget about you !!! you’re the sweetest creature ever, so so pure and lovely that you melt my heart. you deserve lots of love and happiness and laugh in 2018 and always. i hope you won’t ever be sad even tho it’s impossible but you are meant to be a sunshine !! i love you so so much, please don’t forget that :)

@poshlouis and @louari you two are iconic bitches and i couldn’t love you more. amanda thank you for always being nice to me and aline ,,, just thank you. you are a dream team and i love seeing you two interact on my dash !!!! hope you’ll have the best 2018, i love you two very much a lot

i hope all of my amazing mutuals will have the best 2018, you darlings mean so so much to me, i love you with all my heart !

[arreumddawo]

22/1/21

yo! its like nearly 2am hahah AND it HAS been such a long time since i last posted here and i’m so sorry. i’ve just re-read my past posts and i’m hiding right now ya! HIDING. i’m so embarrassed of who i was back then in 2019?? and i thought i was matured???? please. lah. nabs. my 23 year old self now is cringing!!!!!!

so anyways, a ton of things have happened. i started school! lately, i’ve been saying yes instead of no. i’ve been moving like a train. and surprisingly, i’m doing okay so far. i have a year of school and then i’ll have to start serving my 1 year bond and i’ll..... have to start planning for the two years after,, lol. i really dont know what im doing with my life but i have a rough plan to be a child protection officer in the future but i guess! we’ll see?

there’s just so many updates i feel? i dont even know where to start. 

1. i guess i’m over the 19 year old bustop guy who i wrote a letter to (so sad but yeah he’s just too young and i’m just.. too old!)

2. i am in a terrible taylor swift phase (folklore and evermore omgggg i cant) and i can’t seem to get out of it. maybe i won’t. her songs are healing even though half the time they really just make me want to fall in love with someone. but its okay lah eh sudah nabs

3. i’ve been spending alot of time with my friends (which is good cos they honestly keep me sane and im so thankful for them,, like i honestly think i scored in this department). i even met old friends for goodness sake! lately, end of 2020, i’ve been feeling all sorts of lonely i dont even know man. adulting makes you feel really lonely. and going out with my friends is my only coping mechanism. i just guess i have to get used to this and just!! live! haha its ok nabs you will be ok. you will be lonely but as least you will be rich (inshaAllah) hehehehe

4. i miss my previous nursery class so much. like, so so much i cant even. i’m literally still mourning. they will grow up and forget about me but i’ll be left alone here with my feelings and love for them,, i just cant. im just suppressing my sadness cos i just cant afford to live in the past.

5. met yani yesterday for a meal and it left me soooooo... hais... happy. i loved getting to know her and she was such a cool and super chill person and i’m so happy we could click. she said alot of nice things about me and i’m so happy that someone who used to be a stranger, now thinks THAT nicely of me (even if i dont deserve it). actually, it even made me feel a little better about who i am and i started thinking that, maybe i shouldnt be so hard on myself like no one will like you nabs but if there’s a handful who does, then you are good? not everyone has to like you, you know? deal with it ah? ahh yesterday made me think alot about my authenticity and i was just so thankful for the short time. ive always had this fear that people actually wont like me for who i truly am or like me in general so i guess im very self-conscious about how i carry myself but i feel that i want to worry about this aspect less and just be me. anws i was also so glad she loved the mashed potatoes and the milk pudding at poulet!!!! we talked for like 3 hours until kena halau HAHAHAH BUT YA it was a really great time nonetheless. guess who we sat next to?? SONIA LOLLLLLLL BYE LAH EH AND THANKS GOD

6. met jannah too and we started reminiscing about our past and how we actually just miss,,, being young in general. we talked about memories from the past and even though i hated who i was back then, i really thought for a moment that they were actually really nice times (more for jannah i feel HAHA). made me think about how i’ll turn 24 this year and that this is the youngest i’ll ever be and i just- idk man,, time is running out. time is running out and theres so much i have to achieve both in the dunia and the afterlife and im still stuck in the past. 

7. kak nurul is getting married march 20th. how time flies really. thinking about it actually really made me feel emotional. 7 weekends before she’s married. 7 weekends. i’m....... sad? i’m really sad

as usual i have so many thoughts and i want to share so much more i guess but im so tired and i dont want to write nonsense hahah so i’ll call it a day? thank you for listening againnnn <3 

[atomicsurvivor-isleofskye]

Ep. 3 - “ Anyone who argues with me on Hanukkah is racist CONFIRMED  “ - Rebecka

https://atomicsurvivor-isleofskye.tumblr.com/post/168517002366/tribal-immunity-3-selfie-scavenger-hunt

IT WORKED!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who the hell had the extra vote and why the fuck would they vote for heather? clearly, like fishbach, they have no fucking idea how to use it. oh well

I voted Jake S. I am incredibly angry cause I feel like my whole alliance was shattered. I need to talk to more players, but I don't want to seem like I'm scrambling. I do feel like Jake S and me can work together now though. I don't know, I just hope that this challenge won't send us back to tribal or I will die of shock.

Even though we won by a mile in the last tribal I still feel worried about my performance when compared to others, I don’t want to be a challenge beast but I want to pull my wait, which is why I want to impress in this challenge

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1ppIUdlIWA

Why the fuck did I volunteer to do this when I have two finals coming up??  I just knew that the jakes probably wouldn't I guess. ugh. 

Well... Madison is gone. My plan went accordingly. She is livid at me though, so if she comes back from Redemption Island my game is #toast. I feel awful. I really enjoyed playing with her, and it was truly out of my hands by the time the plan took won’t. I wish she knew this, but oh well. For now, I am going to lay low and ensure there are bigger targets than me going forward. Olivia seems annoyed that I feel bad about the vote. Heather feels bad too. What a world.

I feel so tired but... back to the real game. Gotta move on with heads held high and win this challenge.

I'm glad I'm safe another day! Anyway this challenge is fun I hope I don't cause us to lose!

So I’ve talked with Tim and we’ve agreed to vote for Aundra if we go to tribal, but leak that we’re voting for August so he plays his idol.

Well it is almost four in the morning. I have just completed 2 out of 3 essays due in 12 hours. So..time for a confessional. Luke and I have our work cut out for us tomorrow. It seems at this point that the 5 of us who volunteered for this challenge are going to all participate and try, but AnnMarie and Trip may need a little more pushing. So tomorrow the three of us (Heather included) are going to be the best cheerleaders we can be (and the quarterbacks). Since Madison was the one mapping out the moors we have to try and attempt to take over her role and do the same. We also have to do some intense trust building and keep an eye on Trip. All of us want Trip gone so if we lose this challenge (knock on wood x 1,000,000) he will be the easy target. However he is elusive in his experiences with the moors so in case of an idol the five of us will have to unfortunately split the vote between AnnMarie and him, even though we want to work with her. It would be hard to should that happen, I imagine. I do not want to come off as any sort of leader or anyone calling the shots, so should we lose (the wood is broken at this point but I'm still knocking) I am going to try, with the aid of Luke, to let them propose the plan and take the helm of this one and make them think they're calling the shots. Just hoping at this point that we don't have to. I need to trust build with the Jakes, particularly Canada Jake, and with Heather. I don't think I'll be able to get her to trust me like she used to but I need for that to happen. I can feel her slipping away from me for some reason. So that's about it. On to essay three! Counting down the seconds until this semester is over and finals are done...

hello i have had 3 hours of sleep and luckily that is when i seem to think best! someone is obv gonna find where the cursed idol is (which btw i own) sooner or later so i thought i would go back there so i could find the message of what it says when you visit it after someones taken it, i then rephrased it to tim, who freaked! wooh! and now we're panicking about who has the ~second~ idol. he offered to make an alliance w stephen n i which shows hes close to stephen n trusts him, i also think he has an alliance w august bcos he originally tried to make one w him n me before august and i had beef so i need to watch out for that too. i'm glad i've gained trust from tim but unfortunately tim thinks ain has the cursed idol bcos ain mentioned going to the swamp (where the idol is) before. HOPEFULLY she can talk him out of it, n he can like blame august or something lol. that is today. from me. ps i lvoe ain. happy holidays!

So thankfully the challenge ends on Friday which means I can actually get Home to do it. Most of the videos I can’t do but I’ll try everything else. Finding loopholes in this is super fun. I was so glad Tim and Ain switched. Tim is soooo awkward. Also August is digging his own grave. Stephan is pretty great, Rebecca is always distracted with irl stuff which I don’t blame her for. I don’t even know everyone else. They’re so silent

A potential swamp idol is in play! Tara brought that to my attention that it had been found (If it is even an idol)! And we are losing our shitss. Ain doesnt have it, I dont, Tara doesn't! And here I thought i could relax since I didnt compete in immunity! Boy was I wrong!

I currently love Tara she is a great person and the only person I talk to in the game I would talk to people more but irl my life is in shambles and I don’t know if I’ll be able to to stay in the game much longer hopefully we continue to win challenges and if we do lose hopefully they won’t vote me if we do lose of course my second chance is getting ruined but we will see

Ever since Madison left, Trip has been out for blood and trying to find out who betrayed him. I feel sooo guilty about the whole situation, but its part of the game. I am trying my hardest in the challenge, but so many things are hard to find. I'll make way some how and hopefully end this losing streak we have.

So last tribal, I got a vote which is super scary and made my heart drop. I have no idea who wrote it, but I've been thinking about it and I think it is someone who was in on the Madison plan and had an extra vote, saying that there were 9 votes and not 8. First of all, my name was written in script on the parchment and only one other name was written in script and that had Madison's name on it. Then again I also suspect it wasn't anyone. I gave up an advantage because it could have interfered with the plan to get Madison out, but maybe giving up the advantage put a vote against me. I don't know, but I plan on finding out sooner rather than later.

Trip is stressing me the fuck out I can't take it. I just want to win this challenge so much, that's all.

Anyone who argues with me on Hanukkah is racist CONFIRMED

Well tribal went as planned! The 3 votes for me were from trip, Ann, and Madison, who ended up being voted out. The only issue is there are 8 people on the tribe and 9 votes being read... WHAT!?!? My hunch is someone got an extra vote. ORRRR someone on the other tribe voted for heather. Orrrr heather fucked up in the moors and automatically got a vote cast for her. Idk. But now I feel secure in my 5 person alliance and if we have to go to tribal again, trip or Ann will be leaving us.

it feels like im praying for a win here, it sucks to be on the sidelines but with how busy i am come closer to holidays it worked out, i dont wanna have a huge numbers disadvantage compared to Iolaire, outside of those thoughts, the fact the moors hasn't turned up much is kinda sad, nestle point has been worthless because i was beaten to the punch, well i guess im gonna explore the rocky area

I should have signed up but I wouldn’t have, catch my drift?

Omg I love Heather so much she actually recorded herself singing the song I did for the challenge and I literally cried. So glad we're together and I'm so glad my initial doubts proved to be false. What a sweetheart :')

Some parts of the challenge were embarrassing to do but I did it so yayyyy. I hope we win!

Btw Tara? is winning!

Well... we are on the final day for the immunity challenge. Heather, Olivia and I have been doing VERY well in it, and AnnMarie and Trip have been falling behind. I don’t blame AnnMarie because no one else was stepping forward for the last spot, so she elected to. Trip, however, signed up without telling anyone and has done the least. 

From what I have heard, Trip has also been trying to pin the strange extra vote for Heather on me. I don’t know why he would single me out (aside from the fact that this is Trump’s America and I’m a gay) but he needs to stop before I #snap. I’m hoping the tribe doesn’t get big-move-itis and wanna get me out, so I’m hoping they stick to voting Trip if we lose. 

As for gameplay, I’m still close with Olivia and I am starting to warm up to Heather. I made fun of her in a video I made for the challenge, so hopefully she takes that as bait to talk to me 1 on 1.

Hey friends thirsty?? Here’s e some tea my bff Tara found the idol but it was gone somebody already found it she told the tribe andTim messaged her saying he thinks it was Rebecca who has the idol. Now I could use info to try to get numbers because I’m on a tribe of star war geeks and on the outs so if there’s a merge I’m going to need to be solid with some people so idk what to do cause if we lose they’re probably going to vote Rebecca.

The Saorsa tribe win immunity.

https://atomicsurvivor-isleofskye.tumblr.com/post/168590740101/tribal-immunity-3-results

I cant believe we lost tbh it's probably my fault! I don't want to be voted out yikes

So I was the worse out of all of us in getting things but that’s okay. I think it’s nice that we’re finally going to tribal since I do want to get rid of some people, preferably a male. Not that I have anything against them but the numbers are uneven and it’s annoying me. Or I could leave, who knows. I think I’ve been pretty annoying. However, a lot more people are never there so who knows.

Im literally so shook. I cant believe we lost. I thin we need to vote out an inactive.

My life is already a mess and to add to it my game is about to be a mess. So Tim wants me out and Tara and I are an double pack so when he told her she told me. But she came up with this plan that I pose as a girl and work in this all girl alliance so that way we can have the votes and vote Tim. The only problem is I’m a guy and this thing could flip on me

I hope we get one of the boys out!! Currently I'm gunning for Tim but I wouldn't mind if August leaves. Hopefully Rebecka is honest and wants to join us!

So Tim and the rest of the clone wars want me out because I’n “too quite” when I haven’t had WiFi all week and Even if I wanted too talk to them all they would do is make a small fake convo then talk about the game so idgaf what they think and really hope its one of them tomorrow and not me

So I just heard my name and I'm shook!! Apparently Vi wants to vote ME out over Aundra?!!? Vi sweetie this is our first tribal its too early to get me out!

Ok so theres a bit of scrambling about whether or not we should blindside August and potentially get their idol out or whether we should vote out Aundra for tribe strength. I hope a swap is coming soon though. Also Vi wanted me out because Im a threat but i convinced Stephen into talking her out of I by telling her she's "playing too hard too fast". This first tribal is bout to get interestinggg.

So I laying down enjoying a nice Friday night when August comes at me talking code and what not and I’m sitting around trying to figure out what he’s saying and we’re speaking this secret spy language learning we both want the same person out and I just can’t wait for tribal cause this tribe is full of player and this is going to be WILD

Voting time, hopefully this is a rarity. Straight into it, tim has lead pretty much everyone I’ve talked to onto a vote for aundra. Aundra hopes to vote tim instead, which I think is impossible, but I’ll fuel that fire. Tim was talking to me, offhand I said I was talking to him and someone else and he spiked that “Who is the other person” these kind of questions are the worst. I could really do without them Also, jg and Stephen might be in a “tim is god” cult not sure yet Oh and amazingly and annoyingly infinity suggested randoming his vote.. ????

i kind of need to work on my patience. tim almost immediately mentioned aundras name as someone we could vote and it spread really quickly. aundra is someone i adore!!! so i knew i needed to fix it real quick n needed a way to rope in the votes to make sure aundra could stay. both me and ain have confused aundra for a girl in the past (sorry we love u aundra) and thought it could've been a mutual confusion for a lot of people. i thought if we used that confusion, and told rebecka that aundra was a girl, we could give the impression that the boys have an 'all boys alliance' and are targeting the girls. aundra was down to pretend to be a girl and rebecka bought our story! we were all set to vote august, as long as there were no other drama, but then stephen messaged me saying he wanted to plan a blindside on august!! um perfect?? so currently ain, me, stephen, tim, and rebecka are planning to vote august, whilst vi and aundra will split votes on tim, and i assume jg and august will probably vote aundra. if august does end up using an idol, i'm pretty sure vi and aundra can convince him and jg to flip on tim since tim straight up lied to them both. that means in a revote me, ain, vi, jg, and august will most likely be voting tim. wooh! but yeah! tim and stephen basically saved my butt and threw their own under the bus with their plan. i love!! ps ain is the best and i love her lots

Meant to do this earlier but it took ages to upload https://drive.google.com/open?id=1RO9jF4muRQ1-f8ldV4Jx4Q1HyIV-7vr6

So I’ve been thinking about risks, and how risky this blindside is, but how riskier the alternative is. Sticking with the alliance Ive made is a loyalty move, and one that could give me power and take power away from August. However there are two risks, either August plays his idol or a person flips and one of us goes, or it works, but I become a target for pulling it off. The other option isnt much better, I could go to August and work with him, but thats a traitor move and would betray people who I doubt would forgive me, and paint a target on my back that would feel very familiar. I think in the end I have to stick with loyalty, I need that reputation, and even if it all goes wrong I believe it would be Tara or Tim, or even Rebecka over me, but you never know, and it depends on which scenario plays out. This round is really intense, so many variables, I just have to hope I’ve situated myself so theres less scenarios that end with me going home. So to speak.

WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON WE WON YES YES YES YES. I am so happy!!! I'm glad that I don't have to vote anyone off. I'm also glad that I am going to see what the other tribe is like, and the cracks that they have.

So this tribe keeps getting messier by the minute first I’m the target because when aren’t I. Then we say Tim’s going. Now they want to vote August because he might have the idol (which I think he might) which isn’t really a big deal in my opinion because it’s not. He wants to work with me and I want him saved but saving him could get me Thebes boot plus Tara and him have really bad blood Soviet idk what to do because if Tim has to stay i might go off

AYYYY WE WON. I could not sumbit some stuff for the hunt sadly but I did do a lot. AnnMarie was kind of useless.

https://photos.app.goo.gl/E3Va5mec2byaCMcS2 Me before this tribal

The plan to blindside August needs to come through! We're supposedly making him feel comfy so he doesn't play his idol and vote me out! That would be devestating.

All seriousness I have no clue how tonight's gonna go.  If what everyone is saying is true then august should be going, but I know there's an alliance that Tim, Stephen, and I'm unsure who else are a part of.  I've been talking to Tara and ain and we're going with the men's vote. Im also trying to make connections with people on both sides this time (a trick I learned from Ashvika shoutout to Ashvika) and hope it doesn't get me into too much trouble!

I haven't spoken in it, but I do have a girls only chat for future voting and alliance purposes, especially after Madison being voted off. I still trust lukas, and I want to work with Jake s, but I am not interested in working with trip. I don't like the vibe he gives off. I went to the Moors today, and saw a green thing at the cairn, which I think is a creature where you trade a part of yourself for magic, or something similar to that. I wonder what role it plays in the game haha. I'm so excited to see how the tribal for Iolaire goes, especially their confessions. I don't know any of them, so it'll be nice to see what they say, since I'm planning to getting to the merge. I can only hope and see what the future gives me.

Oh and also vi threw my name out there for being voted out and idk why  so I'm nervous about that but hoping I don't leave tonight!!!

I honestly won't be shocked if I'm blindsided tonight I have a bad feeling about this. Hopefully the vote is simple and we all vote Aundra out. Hopefully no power or idol comes into play or I'll be screwed. Time will tell where people stand cause it's a easy vote , I beki

I’m gullible af and I’m probably leaving so if this is my last confessional, good luck to my right hand woman Tara

Aundra says they are voting tim.. and everyone else is voting aundra. I’m voting tim just in case aundra does pull out an idol, no other reason why. Not telling anyone, including aundra

https://atomicsurvivor-isleofskye.tumblr.com/post/168623103951/tribal-council-3-iolaire

August is voted out 5-3-1-1. 

[sadrien]

wanna chat? pt.23

on ao3 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23

i wrote this because being on tumblr and seeing posts about taz hurt my heart. i was going to make this silly and meme-y, but honestly? i wasn’t feeling it. ive been having a Weird Time, and having something so important to me end earlier the day i started this didn’t help.

and then today happened and just.........i am So Tired

we’ll get back to the goofs next time, but i tried to make the end of this chapter a bit lighter? yeah i failed (multivitamin = adrien, mystic dragon = nino, monster alarm = alya, elfen whatever the heck = mari)

hail and well met all. i hope you enjoy

3:21 in orange wake up mari!!!

multivitamin: Do you ever stare at the ceiling and think about the future And realize you have literally just No clue what you’re doing And you don’t know if you’ll be happy Or successful And you’re just looking at the ceiling And debating your entire life And looking at all these choices you have to make and paths you have to choose And what you HAVE chosen so far and how it’s shaped your life And how everything could be different if you had just changed That one thing But you didn’t And now you’re here Staring at the ceiling

3:57

mystic dragon: one sec i cant do this with this nicknam e

mystic dragon has changed their nickname to mental support

mental support: first things first you ok? you dont sound ok

multivitamin has changed their nickname to existential crisis

existential crisis: I’m fine just Feels weird

mental support: dude im sorry i wish i could tell you that itll all be good but we both know thats a fucking lie but man youve got so much going for you youre talented as fuck you come from an amazing family youre an awesome person youre super smart its chill if you dont know what you wanna do right now weve got time and the past is the past we cant change it (and yo if we could we really really shouldnt) so like…why get hung up on it ok that was bad wording its super easy to get hung up on it especially when its ass oclock in the morning and your brain hates you   just like deep breaths man youre gonna be ok id hug you if i could but none of our parents would be chill with that

existential crisis: …… Can we do a call

mental support: of course you dont even have to ask gimme a sec to grab headphones and turn on a light

existential crisis: Ok

PM between mental support and existential crisis

4:06: Call started

6:35 in orange wake up mari!!!

monster alarm has changed their name to love and support

love and support: in this chat we love and support adrien agreste and each other

love and support has renamed this conversation to in this house we love and respect each other

love and support: brains suck and im sorry u feel like this marsh least it decided to hit u w/ that on a weekend r u feeling any better??

existential crisis: Yeah a little I might go take a nap in a little bit

love and support: sleep is great 10/10 would recommend its like practice for death

mental support: why are you up al?

love and support: sisters they were moving around attempting to make toast or something an d knocke dover some pots now we r all up im trying to convince my mom to make pancakes

mental support: best of luck dude

love and support: ill send you them somehow if she does

PM between mental support and existential crisis

7:13: Call ended: 3 hours 5 minutes 42 seconds

existential crisis: Thank you

mental support: anything for you dude <3 love you. sleep well

existential crisis: I love you too

PM between existential crisis and elfentrank fairy drink

existential crisis: I wish we could tell them

8:36 in in this house we love and respect each other

elfentrank fairy drink: Does this mean  I need to change my nicknam e

love and support: yes

elfentrank fairy drink: Ok um Hol d on a sec

love and support: take ur time babe

elfentrank fairy drink: Got it

elfentrank fairy drink has changed their nickname to snack support

love and support: amazing im proud of u

snack support: I do have snack s I need to go find breakfast brb 

PM between existential crisis and snack support

snack support: I wish we could too One day???

13:20 in in this house we love and respect each other

mental support: sup dudes i just had the wildest dream it involved clouds, adrien flying, and like 50 cats brains are fucking weird

snack support: That is so many cats Too many cats

love and support: no such thing

snack support: Youre a dog person???

love and support: and?? i want to die under a pile of animals that love me soft and fluff

mental support: yo al did you ever get your pancakes

love and support: yessss mom is The Best the twins drowned theirs in choclate sauce

mental support: hell yeah got any left over??

love and support: yup want lunch?

mental support: *breakfast just woke up im supposed to clean the apartment today but my moms might not mind me leaving for a bit

love and support: nah i wanna get out of the house for a while besides i wanna chill w my bf without the twins annoying me @mari @adri u 2 want any? i can swing by and/or pick u up on my way

mental support: i think hes still knocked out hopefully he is anyway he looked really tired last night this morning he better still be sleep

snack support: Im good al but thanks! Spend some time with your bf without me in the way

mental support: yo wtf

love and support: u!! r not in the way!!!!!!

mental support: ^^^

snack support: Its fine really!!! Ive got a dress to work on today!!!!

mental support: youre sure?? youre not just giving us space??

snack support: Yeah Im positive Ill send updates The pattern is kicking my ass

love and support: kick its ass right back babe ill hold your flower

mental support: have fun dude!!!

love and support: btw ill b over in like 20 nine cool???

mental support: not changing out of my pjs

love and support: thats a mood see u then?

mental support: yup! <3

PM between existential crisis and snack support

snack support: Im on my way over Dont freak out Which…...wont be helpful if youre asleep

 16:20

existential crisis: I know you’re probably still on the way home but Thanks for coming over <3 And yeah One day

[cronagorgon]

@pink-spaceturtle5 first off i want you to know that i waited all day to type this post because my sane awake self was too embarassed to even think about it. i am now tired as fuck and ready to .. dissert.............. anyway. (inhales) i havent seen it in a good minute so i do not remember the details and like fuck am i gonna rewatch it now but my MAIN beef was that everything was drawn out wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too much. its like fuckin 300 in here, movies only like 40 minutes long if you'd just cut out all that goddamn slow motion. i wanna stress though that the point isn't remove the drawn out shit, the point is wrap up and replace it. instead of spending like 8 hours on whats her face naomi the fuck's husband and random past and like how she knows shit about kira just to have her killed off before anything ACTUALLY happens could they have like... i dont know. expanded on the mysterious shinigami realm which we know jack shit about. i mean its just a suggestion. that brings me to my second point. the show dragged me in because of the shinigami shit, it was so mysterious and cool!! but they don't expand on it NEARLY enough. the most we get about it is from those fuckin rule cards at the beginning and ends of commercial breaks. lame. i'd have LOVED to see like, an afterlife, the canon purgatory everyone goes to when they die, the shinigami king, maybe shinigami politics, buildings, SOMETHING. i get that it's like.. supposed to be some kind of empty purgatory-like wasteland (the same one everyone goes to when they die?? but where are they?? are they all shinigami??? wouldnt that be way too many shinigami????????? this is exactly the problem) but it'd have been SO cool to see some lovecraftian architecture or some kind of weird fucked up alien/extradimensional society with different heirarchies and priests and shit (that worshipped the king?? thinking emoji?). along with this literally why the fuck do shinigami even have death notes. how and why does the king make them (does he make them? i think i remember reading about that somewhere but honestly who knows), why does he give them to other shinigami, why doesn't he ever make 2 for a shinigami, what happens when a shinigami dies, why isnt there like a surplus of notes because of dead shinigami, why is the king the king and can he be usurped and if so how?????????????? like im really glad i know everything about like actual japan but could they not have given me like 5 minutes of detail about the fantasy world that i can't google. for my final angry point of tonight, what the FUCK was that shit with the bells?? why did l seem like he knew he was gonna die???? what the hell was that shit. was there like a thing with that? i mean it would've been cool if there was some kind of connection between the human and shinigami world that was like ancient you know, like people had been given death notes since the dawn of time and wrote that shit down, made a religion, i dont know SOMETHING, and it was somewhat like hidden like freemasons or whatever conspiracy and like maybe he knew about it?? was part of that secret society?? i mean?? theres potential there right. and at the very least it would cut out like 100% of the jumping to conclusions that happens 68% of the show (as in most of the show until right before l dies and suddenly no more conclusions are jumped to. crazy how that works. how it just feeds right into the plot like that. so mysterious). also i lied bc i have two more minor complaints and they're this: if they're named can you kill animals and even plants with a death note, and rem should not have died holy shit

[survivormoheli]

Episode Eleven - “I've never felt so popular” - Eric K

Tim

This literally could NOT have been a more worse challenge for me. I did this in Lago De Atitlan and my ass gave up on it because I could never get the correct answer so I quit and or never submitted. Im literally cryinggggg this is like the worst. Mastermind was robbed of being the final 7 challenge tbh.

Eric K

The one day I actually don't spend my life in the lab and I'm away from my laptop and my phone's dying and everybody is messaging me! I've never felt so popular... But obviously the desperation to stay was real for Dani with a few missed Skype calls I noticed once I got my phone plugged in. I'm happy with y current position but the thought of me potentially being at the bottom of the totem pole in my alliance is definitely in my mind. Richie has approached me but I feel like that's out of desperation to stay in the game. I think I'm going to message people individually in my alliance to see what I can get out of it in terms of reassurance...

Lynn

okay okay okay yay i’m safe and as stressful as this vote was it was really nice that my alliance was there for me and willing to go to rocks to keep me in the game! it really made my heart happy and i love them! 

Blake

The plan worked! Tara got him to trust her by telling him she wud take him to F3 with Eric and that she wud take me and Lynn out! And j got to Erica by baiting Dani into saying she wants to vote Tim out! And she also said the same thing about Eric so now I know inhale gim with me the entire game! Bc I also got quotes of Richie and Phoenix saying they wnat Eric out! Quotes are magical I’m leaneing so much about skype! And well witht I’m i was like you really wanan go to rocks for someone who wrote your name down and only Flipped in the last hour. Me and Tara go to him we r a great team!!

Tim

SO I completed the Immunity challenge in about 5 minutes and honestly I'm shook. I may not have it in the bag but I'm proud of myself for completing it nonetheless. I just wonder if Lynn and Blake's time advantage will allow them to snatch the win. I'm just not entirelyyyy confident that I have a good time but who knows. 

Phoenix McInroe

DANI!!!!! Nooooo :-(

Blake

tbh im scared to do this challenge bc ik i need to win it bc im definitely gettin votes tonight. BC i dont knwo iff eric is fully with me...

Blake

F3 will be me Lynn and Tara you are hearing this first here on Moheli Confessions thank yo have a good night.

Blake

If Tara or Lynn flip on me my heart is broken and they deserve to win this game

BLAKE

HI YES HELLO BLAKE IS AN IDIOT AND DOESNT KNOW HOW TO COPY AND PASTE HJSKDFJSDNKDF  I WUD LIKE OF HAVE LIKE 45 SECS SHAVED OFF MY TIME IF I WASNT A FREAKIN IDIOT I HATE MYSELF! CCOPY AND PASTING IS GONNA SEND MY ASS HOLE HOME OMG RIPPP!

Lynn

a lil aggravated at my closest alliance rn but ik i can’t let my annoyances ruin a good ass alliance but god i’m a little tired of working with him and it’s killing me slowly inside to continue 

Eric K

Hi I won! I'm honestly so surprised!! But yayyyy!!!

Eric K

I'm thinking of putting in Raffi and JG because I was iloj good terms with both of them before they got voted off. I know some of the members of my alliance may be in danger but I'm hoping they will make a decision that's best for me in the end. Fingers crossed!!

Blake

I AM SOO GLAD ERIC WON! maybe lol idk im suspicious of him bc like i hope he sees me more as a friend then a threat bc he cud easily turn on me ... just one more vote. then it wont matter what he does! me lynn and tara are planning to go all the way with this!

Tara

me n phoenix r gonna hang out irl tomorrow!!! i'm so excited!! we're gonna see love simon n eat ice cream. i think i'm getting voted out today tho...... so drama! hhopefully i don't bcos i rly wanna see love simon HAHAHA 

shoutout to ISAAC!!!! thank u for drafting me. u r the bomb dot com. ko te isaac ko te poma. thats some maori for u!! maori is the native language in nz i'm tryna use it more in my vocab. um anywayyy thank u isaac for drafting me i think i don't know u either but it'd b rly cool 2 chat! can u believe i got to f7?? i rly thought i was getting premerge but wowzas i' m here! i hope i get u lots of points and u win. ka pai! haere ra, e noho ra! 

Tim

With Raffy and JG voting this round things are going to get intensee. Im really relying on them voting Blake so Richie can live. Also Eric winning immunity and making him less goaty? Surprising. 

Richie

well...... last round i was so suspicious that things weren't going to go well and i was right which sucks... there was a big thing where dani wanted to take out tara and tim wanted to take out lynn so i was trying so hard to work on that situation to nail down the plan before doing anything else and then all of a sudden tim was like "i got the votes to get rid of lynn" and i was like....?????? and then he said  he had tara and i was like !?!?!?!!?!!!!!???? and i was trying to seem trusting of tim bc im still probably on thin ice from the raffy vote and he assured me that everything was in place but i should have done more and then the votes came in and it was a tie and i tried to get eric but he ignored me and i was like fuck bc i knew tim wouldnt risk rocks for dani so shes gone and now blake/lynn/tara are all still here and all i have now is tim and phoenix and me and phoenix havent talked since l i t e r a l l y day 3.... i knew i had dani and dani had phoenix but now shes gone its like.... fuck

i went to the group chat of me tim and phoenix and really reiterated that we need to stick together and i was like hey we havent been the best group but the only way we make it is if we're together....bc if theyre desperate and think its one of them i dont want them going around throwing me under the bus to save themselves this round!!!!  ive been working on building a personal relationship with eric and during the revote debacle i proposed a f3 deal with him but idk where that stands im hoping thats something that can save me bc hes #4 in blake/lynn/tara who are a strong group if i'm promising him f3 thats the better option for him.... god i hate this i just want to survive this vote bc 7th place sounds so much uglier than 6th place 

Richie

also i was reading the rules and it said there was no idols in this game but there were still rules on how to play an idol....... and all the rewards in this game have been super immediate like advantages for the current round or the following one but i remember there was one week where someone won reward and nothing came out of it..... and i thiiiiiiiink it was blake??? so im not sure but i wouldnt be surprised if he pulls something out tonight since its his first time being openly non-immune that he probably feels in jeopardy but id rather take the shot at him tonight and risk it than play it safe bc im probably going home anyway and if jg and raffy are voting from the jury they'll hopefully direct their anger at blake??????? which might make it so we dont even need eric?????? ugh who knows... i feel like if blake really felt in trouble tonight he would have come to me about this vote.... 

Tim

Based on Tara's answer she's gonna be solid with Blake and Lynn and ughhh that hurts but here is the tea: https://brandnewconfessionalblog.tumblr.com/post/172461067963 

Blake

I’m scared af about this tribal! Richie is smart he’s gonna try to get Eric to vote me out! Sooo nervous I hate not being immune this is worse than the open world. It’s getting so close to F3 and I just want to get there soo ba domg i hav worked sooo hard I voted ppl out I care about and I don’t want that all to Ben in vain! And I’m super excited about the F6 twist I want to know So bad! This is my last super scary vote! After this Ik me Lynn and Tara will stay together. This is the last time it won’t be a tie vote or majority I think unless some advantages come into play! 

[ts-crossroads]

Episode Nine - “I’m An Indecisive Mess” - John

I really hope that this is the round that we get Julia out. There's one thing that I do not tolerate, and that's people who LIE ON ME. Julia was in on the Ned vote the entire time and wouldn't even own up to it after the vote until I confronted her on it. I went from trusting her the most to not trusting her at all. This round is crucial. From what I've gathered, the other side wants to take out Sam and I can't lose another ally. I need to keep numbers on my side so that I can gain back control in the game. Ryan wants Sam out because she got mad at him on call and apparently made a chat with him the first round of merge and then voted for him. Julia somehow knows that Sam and Autumn are voting for her (probably Ryan) so she wants them out too. It comes down to Dane and John. Dane told me straight up he didn't want to vote Sam out, so I think he's good. But John is being weird. He wants Julia out because I told him she called him shady a bunch of times but he's constantly worrying about what Ryan will think. STOP PLAYING RYAN'S GAME! I need John to side with us regardless if Ryan agrees or not to make this move.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XS5jlv-lEcQ

I think im gonna go pray to the godess an calm down. I honestly feel like im being paranoid. I mean do I trust the 6 alliance anymore? No. Hell no. Do i trust some of them? Yes. Rebecka, haley, an ryan. Autumn has been asking who people are voting, so it makes me think sam may have the idol, or that sam dosen't and autumn just wants to ride majority. So im hoping this is the case. Still nervous but, ya know.

At this point in the merge nothing really exciting is going on anymore it's kinda easy sailing since I'm in majority and then have my own alliance within that one. Jake sam and autumn are just sitting ducks at this point and then the rest pluck one by one 

So last vote was almost a success. I wanted to get to the end without a single vote cast against me, but what can you do when we have bitter betties? Okay so i have 10 minutes so my plan overall right now is to blindside Julia with Rebecka, but Ryan doesn't know that and he's supposed to be my f2 but he was fake to me before tribal council so I'm not trusting him atm. I'm going to pretend that Rebecka isn't flipping and I'm acting defeated that my plan isn't going to work out, but it will. 

Okay so I haven't made a confessional since reward was posted. I was stressed about immunity bc I tied with jake and then I lost the tie breaker, which sucks. But I think I can work something out. I found another half idol so NOW I HAVE A FULL IDOL! I am playing it tonight. I don't know who is voting with me or against me, but I don't think I have the numbers and I am NOT going home with an idol. Ned did it and I would rather waste it than take it to jury. Me Jake Autumn and MAYBE Dane and MAYBE Rebecka are voting Julia, but I'm not confident enough to trust them. Everyone else is voting me so. Also, I need to stop crying about Ned and Bryan. Time to start playing the game. I am ready.

I'm an indecisive mess. 

Okay tribal just happened. I'm sweating a lot. I wasted my idol basically. I did get votes, but only 4 of them. There were 4 for Julia and then I voted for Ryan. If I would have voted for Julia and not played my idol, I would still be here AND have an idol for the future. But since I switched my vote, it tied and then my idol made her go home. It's hard bc a part of me is pissed that I wasted it. But another part of me sees a light in the distance. Autumna and Jake are the only ones who know I voted Ryan. Not even Dane knows. Right now, Coffey and Ryan think it was Rebecka. This hopefully will cause them to trust her less. But Dane's crazy advantage may mess us up right here. There is no immunity. Dane can sit out of tribal tomorrow, be immune, and not cast a vote. Or he can come, vote and potentially be voted out. He told me that he is too busy and he is sitting out, which sucks. Now there will be 7 votes. And I know Haley, John and Ryan won't vote with me. My only hope is Rebecka. And either way, none of those 3 believe that she voted with them. Julia got 4 votes. The obvious solution would be me, jake, autumn, and dane. They would never assume I would throw away a vote to ryan, especially how low I am, numbers-wise. AND there was a voting confessional for Julia (I think Autumn wrote it) but it said "this is for imperium" and i have literally cried to ryan and john about how sad i was seeing ned then bryan go back to back. They most likely think that was me. I think this then created distrust among them and rebecka, so hopefully we can pull her to our side. I think the smartest vote this round will be Ryan. He has had it out for me for a while and he has the closest connections on the other side. Let's face it, he is holding the other side together. John and Haley are not close, but Ryan has been playing both of them against us. I'm stressed whew. I'm lowkey mad at Dane for skipping, but it makes sense for his game so I don't blame him. I just need to work on Rebecka right now. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtkSVB5MpwU

Never thought I'd be able to say this in Crossroads but I'm in the majority and the dog days might be over!!! http://cdn.playbuzz.com/cdn/812ff861-5e39-403c-899c-9e6e33e7d36c/d5504a1c-f8e2-4028-96f6-6b038180e644.gif Highkey told Dane before tribal that I'd hang him out to dry if he flipped back to voting Sam and voted Imperium out for the 3rd time. And we all know I'm cracked enough to deliver soooo we stan tough love haha. He's still cancelled, BUT John and Ryan can enter jury before him/ they already have 3 strikes. I'm so done with John I can't even; he has no backbone and all his does is flop and lie. How are you gonna say we should work together every round and then ghost whenever it's time to vote or when I ask you what's happening? Fakest person in here and he's voted someone Imperium the past 4 rounds; I want him gone so bad but I gotta maximize Dane not being able to vote and put the target on Ryan

 Also y'all saw Owen use his admin powers to blow up my game on camera by reminding everyone that I'm on Imperium and that the tribe has voted out Imperium the past 3 rounds right? OK COOL JUST CHECKING http://i.imgur.com/uN6iEBs.gif So if the tribe speaks this week and I suddenly go to jury, do me a favor and riot cause Owen is rigging for the uglies thanks

My sleeping meds are making me miss this whole game Bc I'm always SLEEP rip 

Everyone is still trash and thus they are still cancelled. Ryan and Haley are pressing me about the vote and I'm like what is there to talk about?? Y'all been coming for my side of camp the past 4 rounds. Flattery will get you nowhere. In other news Rebecka and I are officially on the same side/ working together!! Our parents Duncan, Mitch, and Amanda are probably so proud. Also I think Dane is done flopping and is back to being trustworthy?? But never say never Also John is going home tonight because he can't stop lying, constantly flip flops, doesn't have a backbone, has voted someone Imperium out the past 4 rounds, etc. It's funny cause I like John as a person hahaha; he's just doing too much and he needs the Boardroom's permission to do anything. The Boardroom would be John, Ryan, and Dane because anytime me, Jake, or Sam try to talk game to them, they say "ok I'll talk to the guys" and disappear for 4 hours. Then they come back like "ooh uhhh I don't think Dane/Ryan/John is on board" or "yeah I still don't know what I'm gonna do" when the vote is due in an hour. Anyway, I'm tired of building each round around what The Boardroom may or may not do. NOW LET ME OUT OF THE WOODS DAMMIT IM OWEN https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a4/76/7e/a4767e9175f6fd603aa51d12b23c1ddf.gif

Hi VL!!! Sorry I didn't start talking to y'all until recently because I only recently learned that vl confessionals are a thing that I'm allowed to do lmao. Anyway you guys are in for a treat tonight- people swear they're going home even though they're not getting votes while others aren't even talking to me and I've already used majority to seal their fate. So a lot of games and drafts are getting wreckt tonight and you don't wanna miss it. Watch Crossroads tribal tonight at 10 pm EST!! 

Tribal is happening soon. I'm very nervous. Me, Autumn and Jake originally had a plan to get Ryan out, but apparently he has an idol he wants to use tonight, so we had to switch our target. Hopefully he still plays it. We are voting John out, and Rebecka is telling us she is with us, so hopefully he goes 4-3. Dane isn't voting with us so we can't rely on him to save us this time. Haley came to me earlier and asked me for a name. It was really weird. I know she went to Autumn and Jake as well. I don't know if she truly is desperate in this game or she thinks she can actually get information out of us. We told her Ryan, and she says she will write down any name at this point to not go home. There are 2 scenarios that could happen from this. 1. Haley goes immediately to Ryan, he plays the idol on himself and it is wasted. or 2. She votes out Ryan because she is so desperate to not go home. Then we vote out John, and then Ryan is left and knows that Haley flipped on him. Having those two here and not trusting each other would be great. I feel like Ryan has such a handle on John and Haley and we really need to split him away from those two. It's scary to think about the future, because I don't know if I will be there. A part of me wants to start planning my FTC speech and my f3 (which would most likely be Jake and Autumn) but Haley told me a few hours ago that John and Ryan were voting for me this round too. They think it's safest because my idol is gone. Now I' m stuck with just 2 coins that I'm impatiently waiting to exchange them for something. I'm really annoyed at Ryan and John constantly going against me and my side. I understand why Ryan is, I flipped on him and voted him out when we technically did have an alliance together (even though my heart wasn't in it). I just don't understand why I can't get along with John in this game. I have done nothing wrong to him. All I have done is listen to him and be lied to ever since merge started. It sucks that he has been so against me, especially because I thought we were good friends outside of this game, but he wants nothing to do with me, and he wants me out of the game so badly. I'm definitely getting votes tonight. I just don't know how many. Me Autumn and Jake are voting for John. If Rebecka joins us, we have majority. I just worry about any idol plays. It's getting to the end and people won't have much longer to use them. I need to compete hard in this upcoming immunity if I'm still here. Also I don't think me voting Ryan was the worst move anymore. Haley today told me that she thinks Rebecka voted for him, and I knew Ryan and John already think that. Also, another thing, I'm nervous that I may have lost some trust with Autumn and Jake over having the idol. Because I told Jake in pms first and then hours later he was like maybe we should tell autumn and I'll pretend I don't know, and I was like that sounds great. So I told them. But Autumn was a little hesitant with me when I told her. I hope it was just shock and not betrayal she felt. I really need these two to make it in this game. I couldn't even imagine having to strategize with Haley or John. 

Sooooooooo, I decided to make a move this round by pushing for Julia to go. I love Sam and Autumn but they want John out and are working with Rebecka to do it and I can't vote out John. I brought it up to John and Haley and then talked to Ryan and they seem down to do it. Rebecka seems to be extremely close to Dane, and Dane seems to have ties with just about everyone in this game...except me. I'm sorry but why should I vote out John who's always been honest with me and talks to me over Rebecka who hasn't bothered talking to me all game. I need to take some power away from Dane before he takes us all out.

Wow what a twist! Definitely didn't see Julia going home last night definitely miss her psycho ass. People are all on edge and think they are next to go and people don't know who has idols anymore in this game or who has half. I just hope we can keep the numbers and john, Ryan and myself will go to finals.

https://youtu.be/Unb-Fl7JsUQ